#AND SO I JUST HAD TO SPEND A FULL 10 HOURS WITH THEM AND NOBODY ELSE AND OH MY GODDD I CANT TAKE IT ANY MORE

[vitamin-zeeth]

Just had to third wheel for like 10 hours today if I see a single romantic "___ bf X ___ gf" post ever again I'm going to blow up a building

[wizardrousactivity]

They Promise. Part I

Next>>>>

Synopsis: After the break up with your two partners, you find out you're pregnant. Causing you to fall into a depression and bankruptcy, a month after you give birth they show up at your door. Pleading for you. CW: Pregnancy, depression, break-ups, reader is fairly young. (early twenties) so [age gap] hurt/comfort It’s been about 10 months since König and Simon had left you, knocked up and depressed. You were breastfeeding your month old while sitting in your kitchen, eating up the last of some spaghetti you made. - everything felt empty, sultry and lazy. Spending most of your time weeping in your room until the baby screamed, rushing over to soothe it whenever you could. You needed to care for this baby, he’s all that you have. Your fingers trace over his small hands, rubbing them softly, it gave you comfort that you had another breathing - living human besides yourself in this house. Kissing his forehead you gently lowered him into the crib, looming over the wooden bed before making your way back to the kitchen. Till you hear a knock at your door, stopping you in your tracks. Staying cautious at who could be there at such an hour, you turn on your heel and peek through the blinds. A man the size of a grizzly bear and another man roughly his height. You can’t recognize the both of them till you see the familiar sniper hood and skull mask. Anger boils in you, a slight pang of guilt whirling in your stomach when you think of them seeing the baby. - Wrapping your hands around the handle, a lump growing in your throat once you open it to meet their eyes. Both of them are almost at their knees when you appear at the door, still the same. So perfect, so pretty for them. But they can’t forget they left you, sad and depressed for the entirety of 10 months.

 - Then suddenly you’re back to the first 5 months, trying to stay content with your situation so as to not stress out. You cried almost every day, rubbing your belly and thinking of what was growing in there. The shock was too much for you, causing you to nap through the day just to escape everything. It took a while to realize that it wasn’t the answer to anything, you accepted the baby. But you couldn’t accept the break-up yet. The sound of Ghost’s voice breaks you out of your thoughts, a deep gruff voice almost full of guilt. “We need to talk.” “What the fuck is there to talk about?” You retort, you were surprised they even came back. Leaving you deserted so coldly, with a baby they didn’t even know about. Tears build up in your eyes, dripping down your face immediately.   "Liebling- please.." König  interrupts, his hand reaching out to rest on your shoulder till you swat it away. Voice weak and dry. "Don't fuckin' touch me!" His heart pangs with guilt, he needed you. They needed you. The months they spent without you were cruel, half of the girls they met only being hookups to fuck and leave. Crack whores showing up at their shared flat almost every week. Everything goes chaotic until the baby begins to shrill, crying out for his mama upon hearing the noise. Cursing under your breath in panic - rushing upstairs to soothe him once again. König  and Ghost follow you upstairs, stopping in their tracks to stare at the tiny child you are holding in your arms. Patting it's back to calm it down. "Y\n?" König  begins to speak, dumbfounded by the baby. "Where did he come from?" You scowl, look at him with utter disgust. "Its my baby. You guys left me when I got pregnant." Memories begin to flood with your first 3 months, throwing up every morning, nobody was there for you. The food was the hardest part, you barely had any money to spare during that time. You still don't. Guilt boils in their stomachs, watching you care for it with such gentleness. Gentleness they'll never experience again, only touch starved and lonely again.

"Can I hold m'?" Ghost asks, making his voice more gentler around the premise of this now sleeping baby - holding his hands out. Swallowing, you hand him the baby. "What's his name?" He says as he gently engulfs the baby, holding it with ease and security.

"____, that's his name." You dryly respond, licking your lips and putting your hands together. He notices your nervous gesture and hands it back to you. Sighing heavily Ghost puts his hands on your shoulders, rubbing circles in them softly with his thumb. The action making warmth grow in your stomach. Finally speaking amongst the silence, your voice comes out deprived and quiet. "You guys know I can't forgive you after..." Your voice comes to a stop, tears beginning to trickle down again.

"We'll prove it to you then, give us some time baby. We promise." König  makes a grunt at that, putting his hand on your jaw and making you look at him. "Sounds good, nicht?"

[zvmz]

A few Cerise Hood HCs <3

okay so obviously- shes tall. like 5'11

ramona is 6 foot, tho. she constantly brags about being taller

once every few months, her whole family rents an air bnb in the middle of nowhere. they all go meet there and spend a few days together where no one can see. they do a full week twice a year

cerise is very ticklish, and her mom is a tickler

nobody in school knows shes ticklish because her friends are very respectful of her personal space, since cerise is uncomfortable with physical contact, and everyone else is too scared to touch her, much less tickle her

MUSCLES!!!! LOTS OF THEM!!!!!!!

she has a very unhealthy obsession with hot chips

and she will put an absolutely insane amount of hot sauce on her food. she used to use only a normal amount of hot sauce on her food, but has been slowly increasing the amount just to mess with raven, who has zero spice tolerance

always asks raven if she wants a taki when she buys a bag. again, just to mess with her

loves film bro movies. yk like christopher nolan, quentin tarentino, martin scorsese type stuff

is starting to get genuinely concerned as to why cedar hasnt picked up on her being half-wolf. i mean they LIVE TOGETHER

the truth is every time cerise slips up and does something um wolf-like, cedars like hmm interesting i guess thats just a human thing i didnt know about and forgets about it

sparrow considered cerise his cool cousin. cerise considers him her annoying cousin

used to sneak liquor with sparrow at family reunions (hood side only obviously)

does finger guns way too much

she has on multiple occasions used her cloak to pretend shes batman while singing "something in the way" in a raspy voice

knows so much gossip bc shes so quiet and in the shadows that people forget shes there and talk right in front of her

has a habit of biting her nails

went through a fnaf phase when she was 10-11

has had the same pair of ratty, falling apart converse for years now and refuses to buy new ones

running with carmine through the forest is like therapy to her. any time shes stressed she'll go for a run to take her mind off things

sometimes she'll decide to take a quick nap with carmine, but she has a habit of just falling asleep for hours in the forest

sometimes she would accidentally sleep out way past curfew and have to sneak in to her dorm

cedar taught her how to paint (i think theres actually a frame in the series showing cerise painting a wolf)

cerise doesnt paint often, but occasionally when cedar is painting, she'll come sit next to her and do her own thing

cerises dad loves rock music. he was definitely a "what band is this?" dad. music is one of the things they bond over the most

he gave her a diskman for her last birthday and has bought her a cd every time they've visited each other since then

she talks and moves around alot in her sleep

its scared the crap out of cedar on several occasions

will bite you if you steal her food

has bit ramona for stealing her food

has been bit by ramona for stealing her food

is always uncomfortable around the rich royals, but has always felt somewhat at ease around ashlynn for some reason, she has no idea why

cupid knows cerises secret, of course she knows how to spot a werewolf

she has very fast reflexes

when the students had their year book pictures taken, the photographer refused to take cerises picture unless she took her hood off. cerise argued with him for a while before she finally just walked out

she tried explaining the situation to headmaster grimm but he just told her that if she wants to be in the yearbook, she has to follow the photographers rules

the truth is grimm was getting suspicious about the hood and wanted to see what was up. he paid the photographer to try to get her to take the hood off

anyways now hes even more suspicious

eventually, once a good amount of students join the rebellion, cerise reveals her secret

once she finally looses the hood, she decides to get a haircut. she gets a wolf cut, of course

a few months after her secret is revealed, its as if her personality did a complete 180. she becomes much more confident. louder. happier.

[povbeth]

six roses | percabeth (0)

series masterlist

chapter summary: it's been two years since percy left town (read: annabeth), and neither of them can stop thinking about each other.

wc: 2.8K

warnings: it's just a lot of emotional constipation and regret and sadness and- [car crashes into me]

a/n: hellooooo :p honestly don't know what i'm doing bc nobody posts percabeth fanfic on tumblr but guess what? i do! i've been wanting to do a series like this for a while so i'm glad i'm finally getting started on it. lmk what you think here!

also posted on ao3

prologue: thinking about you.

Grover has been watching Annabeth lose herself for the last few hours. 

Had she known, Annabeth would argue that Grover does this every morning. But today doesn’t follow their normal routine. The two canceled their shift at work for the next morning and took an early leave to prepare. Instead of locking her bedroom door and rotting in bed, Annabeth hobbled over to her best friend's house for a night with no sleep and a bag full of candy, ready to binge watch Disney classics till the sun peeks through the windows. 

It’s an annual event, one that follows a 10 year tradition; One the same day every year, Annabeth and Grover have a sleepover, in which they total approximately two hours of sleep and six hours of movies. 

It’s supposed to be fun, and Annabeth does find it fun. But for the last two years, it’s been different. Tainted. Scarred. And Grover knows this, but will never say it out loud. 

“Whatcha thinkin’ about?”

He’ll make her say instead. 

She’s not surprised at the question. Really, it was inevitable. Grover knows what joy looks like, and he knows what a lack of it looks like on Annabeth. She could feel his eyes observing her as she stared at Lilo and Stitch without a single tear rolling down her cheek. He can always count on her to sing along with Gaston, but not a peep left her lips. He knows how emotional the Little Mermaid gets you, but he couldn’t hear a sniffle from her. 

She doesn’t bother turning her head to face him. She won’t let him see the silent tear trails on her face. “You already know.”

Does he ever wonder?

Does he ever wonder like I do?

About the memories he’s left behind on a whim, in the hopes for a dream that was miles away. Away from the town he’s been in since he could babble a few incoherent words, towards a city filled with unfamiliar faces Away from the town he can only remember by your name. 

About the memories that haunt her at night, but they swear they’re here to keep her at ease. They should be comforting, but they’re holding her tight enough to be suffocating. 

Maybe they’ll let her sleep tonight if she cries a bit. Just a teeny bit. 

Before she knows it, her eyes are teary. Grover feels her shift on the makeshift bed the two made on the ground. “You good?”

Nights spent on the phone talking about forever, an eternity that would only last a little over a year. Had the word stayed true to its meaning, she wouldn’t have hated it. Spending forever with him. She’d sigh and tell him this in hushed whispers as she’d lay in bed with her phone beside her pillow, and he’d giggle a bit. If she wasn’t too caught up with the idea of eternity with him, she would’ve realized that he’d never reply with confirmation. That he thinks about it too, that her idea of forever exists in the realm of possibility. 

Did he ever toy with forever like I had?

She doesn’t respond to the silent boy next to her, who waits for some kind of response. There’s a pile of memories clogged in her blue veins, and they choose tonight to flow properly. 

And so she does what she knows best. 

Lie. 

“I’m good.”

Her memories unravel themselves quickly. They’re only a few years old, but they’ve learned fast.  Really, they’re not evil in nature – sneaking out at one in the morning to see him at a park near her house, writing exclamations of love into his skin during class, holding his hand as he walks her home – but they’re sharp. Short strands, but they have an edge to them. They know where to poke her, where to prod, where to stab. Like shards of glass, meeting her chest with good aim. 

(But it doesn’t seem like an issue. She’d relive them in her head regardless of the pain.)

It doesn’t take Grover long to realize that she won’t say anything more than that. Instead of pushing for an answer, he lazily turns his body to face her. “I miss him too, y’know.”

And that’s what makes Annabeth break. 

Because it’s not just her – it’s Grover, her cousin, and more importantly, his best friend. The boy he’d known way before you, since the two were in pre-school, squalling nonsense that only made sense to them. Brothers who knew each other better than themselves (though Grover would argue that he never really knew him). 

Grover’s hurt too, and it makes everything hurt more. 

She’s sobbing before she knows it, staining her cheeks and pillow in the process. It’s an unmapped cry that escapes her, one that doesn’t sound like her. She tries to pin it on something – regret, distaste, sorrow – yet it doesn’t land quite right. Must be something ugly, something that can only exist in a person who’s come across Percy Jackson.

“It’s been two years,” she manages through the tears. “And I’m still feeling like this.”

“I know.” Grover comforts her. She’ll never know it, but the tears he holds back are only for her. 

“He doesn't even think about us. And I know he did it for himself, for his career, for his family, but it’s just… I don't know–”

“You feel greedy,” Grover tries to grasp. “for wanting him to stay–”

“No, that’s not it!” she barely recognizes the noise that’s coming out her throat. Is this what her memories have done? Turned her into a foreigner of her own voice? “That's not even what I wanted! I just – I just wanted him to tell me… and to tell you…”

…that he was leaving. Not that he didn’t – he did, just on the day of. 

That’s one memory that she can’t unravel. She doesn’t remember how her day started, or how the conversation came about. All she recalls is the moment he said, “I have to leave.”

The rest is a blur. She remembers looking at him incredulously, as if he was joking. She remembers arguing with him, angry at him for choosing to tell her now, when his ride to the big apple was an hour away. She remembers watching him leave, his shoulders slouched as he walked away from the ruins of their relationship. 

She wonders what remains of her now. In his mind, perhaps he only remembers a lousy town with a girl with perpetual mascara running down her face. Maybe he remembers her name, not her face. Maybe she’s a distant memory that he can’t bother to recall, not when he’s at the peak of his career. 

Years pass, and so do her emotions. Hatred has dissolved in her heart, but she’s sure she can build it back up if she wants to. She’s more understanding, that maybe it was for the best. Sure, she wishes he executed things better. But she gets it – Percy was a boy with dreams. And she, better than most people, should know what it means to reach for them. 

It means to sacrifice the things you love the most – and maybe, it was proof that he did love her, at least back then. If that were the case, she wishes that she wasn’t on the top of the list. 

Maybe nothing of her remains, and that’s what scares her the most. Especially when his everything is engraved in her. 

It’s been exactly two years since the day he left, yet the realization only settles in her bones now – she’s afraid that she’s worth nothing more than dust to the boy who once loved her from the sun and back. 

The truth is, Percy wonders too much.

His ‘friends,’ if that’s what he could call them, told him the night was still young. To be clear, it was an hour past midnight, and Percy just wanted to crash at his hotel room. 

To be even clearer, he didn’t know these guys well. He's seen a few of them in that new movie with vampires, and the others are fellow singers whose songs he’s heard far too many times. They smile on the red carpet, baring their fancy looks for the cameras, and wipe the smiles off their faces as soon as they take a step off it. He thinks it’s fair – he’s done the same today – but it doesn’t excuse them from being absolute assholes to everyone who isn’t an A-list celebrity. 

Of course, Percy doesn’t fit in the category of nobodies for them. He’s topping the charts with every new release and bagging every award he’s been nominated for. To the famous clique, he’s one of them, just haven’t been acquainted yet. 

So when Percy happened to have a table near theirs, they invited themselves over with a bottle of alcohol that he swears was not on the menu. 

Percy knew nobody besides Jason, his first friend in the industry, and his only friend at this event. He'd really been hoping that he and Jason could leave without anyone noticing. Like the incredible actor he was, his friend called Percy’s manager and convinced her that the two of them were actually feeling sick. 

“Never going to a gala again,” Jason groans as they enter the hotel lobby. “That was terrible.”

“Yeah,” Percy mumbles. “I just wanna crash right now.”

Percy has never been a man of many words, Jasons noticed. He’s still the shy boy from the small town, even when he has to smile at the paparazzi that followed him practically everywhere. But today in particular, Percy hasn’t been talking much.

Despite the obvious lack of words from the raven haired boy, Jason says nothing. Even as they head up the elevator, the two stand in silence. It’s comfortable, but it’s different from their usual fall of words. Percy’s eyes are closed, not in concentration, but in an exhaustion that Jason can’t seem to pinpoint. 

Jason doesn’t know anything about the town Percy left behind two years ago. He doesn’t know that today marks two years since he’s left it behind, and wouldn’t understand the weight that it holds, even if Percy were to tell him. 

He’s been wanting to ask if something is wrong for the past few hours, and so he finally does. He's not expecting much, but Percy looks at him as if he’s finally hit his tipping point. 

And that’s how Jason finds himself in Percy’s hotel room, having been dragged into the room by his older friend. He’s concerned, surprised by the sudden emotional act Percy’s put on. 

“It’s just…” he heaves as he sits down on his bed. “It's been a long day.”

An understatement at its finest. He knew what awaited him – beyond the gala, there was his family. Sure, they’ve been on good terms, great even, but the weight of his ticket back home seems to weigh the room down. There’s his friends from back home, whose texts pile up on his phone (which Percy ignores). 

And then there’s Annabeth. Clouding his thoughts before he woke up, appearing in his dreams and haunting him before he could take his first breath of the day. 

It’s a given, he thinks, knowing that he’s made peace with everything else back in town. His parents were always supportive, his friends came to understand. But there’s a distance of time and heart between Annabeth and him, and the fact that it’s tainted his perception of who she is now has him begging God to shrink him into nothing. 

So his day was rough. He can’t recall a moment where he didn’t feel an ache in his chest. 

“Wanna talk about it?”

Percy fiddles with the bottom of his tie, rolling the material between his fingers. “well…”

He does, but the last thing he wants to do is say her name out loud. 

“It's been two years since I left my hometown,” he mumbles. It’s easier to say than I broke up with my girlfriend two years ago and haven’t gotten over it since. 

“I see.” Jason says, though he doesn’t really get it. He grew up in the city, and even though the two boys are practically the same, there’s a difference in experience between them. Where Percy grew up was vastly different from this place, so Jason tries to understand. “You miss it?”

“Mhm. I miss my parents, and…”

And Annabeth.

“There's something bugging you,” Jason notes with a frown on his face. “You can tell me, y’know. I won't judge.”

“It’s not that I don’t want to tell you… it’s just complicated, I guess.”

“Well,” he sighs, running a hand through his hair. “I'm all ears.”

Percy doesn’t know what to say. But since his friend’s standing there, leaning against his dresser and waiting for him to speak, he supposes he has to spit it out at some point. 

“Just… thinking about someone.”

“A girl?”

He goes silent for a second too long and Jason panics. “Oh, is it a guy–”

“No, no. It’s my girlfr– well, ex-girlfriend.”

He nods in sympathy. He’s never been in a relationship, but he can imagine how hard breakups can be. “Yhings were rough, I’m guessing?”

Nothing was rough, actually. Things were as perfect as they could possibly be. 

The two were enemies as kids. He remembers bits and pieces – young Annabeth kicking sand in his face, swearing that she’d never go close enough to catch cooties from him. 7-year-old Percy splashing water in her face (read: soaking her with a water bottle) and running away before she could tell his mom. Swore that they’d never be friends unless it rained cows. 

Except things didn’t go as planned; she ended up dating him through highschool, and he ended up leaving her at the end of it. 

“I guess you could say that. We broke up the day I left town.”

Percy doesn’t tell him that it was because of him, or that it happened right before he was leaving for the train station. He doesn’t mention how he was feeling blue for his first year here, and that even though it’s past one year, he feels sick at any memory of you. He doesn’t even say her name, because the weight of his guilt lays heavy on the vowels and it’s too much to bear. 

Instead, Percy does exactly what Jason wanted – unpack how he feels. He lets his feelings escape the lid, listens to them pour out without caring about how selfish he sounds, how terribly hoarse his voice is. 

Annabeth always seems to do this to him. A single memory of her has him feeling like he’s eighteen again. Every memory of that time leads to a dead end, and though a small part of him wishes he could forget her, his mind tends to run back to that time. 

It's incredibly stupid of him to miss her when he was the one who left. He knows this, but can’t help but indulge in the longing he feels. 

And by the time he’s done talking, there’s a box of tissues in his lap and Jason beside him, patting his back as if it could erase every bad emotion he’s feeling.

Jason’s at a loss for words. He didn’t know, but he feels like he should’ve. He should’ve connected the dots when he caught Percy reading old text messages a few days. He should’ve gotten the hint when he saw Percy standing next to another girl as if he was a stiff tree. He should’ve caught on to how his friend never liked to talk about relationships, excusing it as something he wasn’t interested in, despite his unrivaled passion for romcoms.

Percy loves torturing himself by thinking about Annabeth, but talking about her is the opposite – any mention of her seems to bring the mood down for not just him, but everyone around him. The weight of her name is so heavy, it’s a burden on anyone who knows your situation with him. 

It's especially terrible when your Annabeth is inscribed in his heart, his veins adorned with engravings of her. The vessels are shrinking under her load, pressing his chest and squeezing his throat. 

With every mention to Jason, her name escaping his lips makes the weight increase. 

It's been exactly two years since the day he left, yet his heart feels heavier than before. 

[but-the-library-of-alexandria]

This might be controversial but I'm saying it anyway: we need to stop blaming healthcare staff for poor care even when it seems like it's genuinely their fault, because despite what it seems, 90% of the time when doctors dismiss you, nurses are rude to you, and professionals 'don't know enough' about your conditions - these things are caused by systemic issues and not personal failures. They do care, they've just been broken by the system and unfortunately - despite their best effort and then some - they don't have endless patience and smiles left in them.

Let's use an analogy more people will relate to: say you work in a restaurant. Your manager has, for some reason, booked the restaurant out at double capacity. There are people who booked weeks in advance queuing for their tables, and there are walk-ins, too; not just people looking for a nice time, but road-tripping families with hungry kids who can't find anywhere to eat, people who have been sent here because the place they booked at unexpectedly had to close. They're hungry and many are in a bad mood.

If you're good at you job, I'm sure you could manage - despite the stress and vitriol - to handle things in a friendly and apologetic way. I'm sure you'd be able to politely turn people away with recommendations on alternative places to go, apologise when you were late with meals, and still do your best to refill cups and take payments with a smile.

Imagine your manager starting booking at double-capacity every single day.

Imagine watching this become standard practice throughout the city, then the region, then the country. Nobody has anywhere else to go. Let's pretend most of these people have no kitchens and can't cook at home; you are the only source of food for these people, and they need to eat. Every day you spend 10 hours dealing with hundreds of people sobbing, fainting, wasting away in front of you, but you still only have 30 tables and 4 line cooks. Every day you go home knowing you managed to get some people fed, but others are still waiting. You had to go home knowing they might be dead by tomorrow, but if you didn't leave, you might be.

How long do you think you could stay kind? Keep smiling? Keep empathising? All of these people, you know, have every right to eat. They need it. They come here because it's where people come for food. It's your job to feed them. But how long do you think it would take for you to start feeling like people are entitled, when they raise a hand and ask for more water? They're thirsty, and they've waiting a long time. They deserve that water. But do you not think that in your head you'd be screaming, you're thirsty? I haven't had a drink in 8 hours! there's a line out the door of people collapsing from dehyrdration! You're lucky to even have a seat! Do you not think that when someone came to you and said, please, do you have a seat, I haven't eaten all day and my stomach hurts, that you would think about the chaos inside - the chaos they can't see, the starving masses they can't see, the dying and dead they can't see - and tell them to go home and deal with it? How much sympathy could you have, knowing you had barely enough food today to keep everyone in the building alive, and people are complaining that it isn't enough? You know it isn't, but all you have.

Can you image going home, opening up your phone, and seeing an internet full of people talking about how mean you are, talking about their bad experience, saying if they hate serving me so much, why do the job? Would you think of quitting? Would you think of quitting, knowing they wouldn't replace you, and then think of all the people who would be getting one less drink, one less seat at the table, think of the colleagues who'd get one less break, ten more tables to wait?

The point is, you have a right to good healthcare, and the staff trying to give it to you are just as upset that they can't. Try to have some empathy. Your health issue is probably the only one you've dealt with today; the doctor that's telling you it's probably not a big deal has probably just seen ten people with a worse problems, and that doesn't make yours matter less, but she's been given 8 hours to help 100 people and you can't blame her for lacking patience when she knows her next ten minutes could save or doom a life. The nurse that rolled his eyes when you said you were in pain has seen so much pain today. He's jaded, broken, traumatised, a shadow of the genuinely good and caring person his is at his heart. Do you think you would be kind, patient, taking your time, empathising with everyone, if you'd been through the kind of abuse and trauma they have? No offence but some of y'all can't even be kind to people talking about their problems online without telling them to stfu until palestine is free

Please can we stop blaming each other. I know how easy it is to blame the person in front of you, especially when they're rude or dismissive and when you're suffering. I'm not saying it's okay or that you should be okay with it, and I'm not claiming that there are no genuine bad eggs in medicine, but let's not have patients blaming staff and staff blaming patients. Give people grace. Let's support each other in our shared suffering instead of lashing out. The healthcare system is abusing all of us. Stand together. Support the strikes. Empathise.

(note: I am England-based, this is about the NHS but could apply to many healthcare providers. I am also not a healthcare worker, but have friends who are, so that's the peek I've had behind the curtain)

[wildsupernova]

oh, brother.

summary: after a trip to indianapolis, steve starts a long distance relationship with the lead singer of a band performing at a popular grunge bar. little does he know he’s actually dating his best friend’s sister.

word count: 2.4k

warnings: vulgar language, insinuations of sex

authors note

i’m gonna be honest with you guys, this is kind of a shitpost chapter just so i can put something out while i work on more serious stuff lol. i don’t really know how i feel about it but hey, i think it’s pretty funny, so enjoy.

x reader prompts list | full masterlist

Steve had no idea Eddie had a sister until he started dating her.

Looking back on it, it should have been obvious. Despite minute physical differences in appearance, they were practically the same person; same attitude, same likes and dislikes, same sarcastic looks and semi-annoying attitude. Eddie had talked about her once or twice, never really knowing enough about her to share any useful information. All he’d ever said was that his uncle told him he had a sister he’d never met. 

Steve had only met her on a roadtrip to Indianapolis with Robin. It was an impromptu trip to mark Robin’s last summer before college (even though she was only enrolled in community college a half hour away), with Robin claiming she wanted to enjoy her ‘last few days of freedom.’ They’d already spent the first half of the week with the rest of the group, so when Robin suggested she and Steve pack a few things and spend the weekend in Indianapolis, Steve was quick to fill his bags and grab his keys. 

They’d been itching for something to do since driving into town, dropping their bags off in their cheap motel rooms and aimlessly driving around town to find something to do. They’d seen a few small paper signs taped to light posts about a concert going on in the basement of some grunge bar, deciding it was about the only thing they could find that wasn’t closed at 10 pm on a Thursday. After a 15 minute drive through downtown Indianapolis in an effort to find a place, they finally pulled into the dark parking lot behind the building and made their way down the ramp to the basement. 

The basement was probably no wider than the basement of Steve’s house, packed from wall to wall with teens and young adults that were drunk, high, or both. A small stage sat against the wall across from the bar, a few stage lights hanging from the ceiling and a black curtain cutting off the stage from whatever laid behind it. The band’s equipment sat on the stage; a drumset, an electric bass, a guitar. The bright purple guitar sitting next to the microphone stand reminded Steve a lot of Eddie’s, making a mental note to tell Eddie about this place next time he tagged along.

Steve and Robin didn’t know how long they had been standing there before the stage lights kicked on, the second hand high and alcohol all mixing together thanks to a bar that didn’t card and a smoke circle going on in one of the far corners. Anyone else from Hawkins might have had a heart attack seeing it, but Steve was just glad nobody had started popping pills or snorting lines; he’d been to far too many parties with those kinds of people. 

Steve, deciding to spend the night sober considering he was the one that had to drive the two of them back to the motel, was on Robin babysitting duty, despite the fact that he was doing a really shitty job of it; she’d already found her home with one of the other girls in the venue, drink in hand and distant look in her eyes. When he went over to make sure she was alright, the other girl assured him she was sober and Robin was in good hands, so he decided to let her have her fun for the night and mingle amongst the crowd.

As soon as the curtain on the back of the stage opened, the crowd started to go wild, sending out whistles and cheers at the performers that began to fill the stage. He hadn’t seen the name of the band on the sign, nor was it anywhere in the venue, so he didn’t know what to expect. This wasn’t exactly his usual hangout, only coming to places like this whenever Eddie landed a gig or wanted to get loose for the night. He decided to just stand to the back of the crowd and watch as the band set up, eyes never leaving the stage as the last band member came through the curtains. 

You were probably one of the most beautiful girls he had ever seen, basked in the red and blue stage lights shimmering a few feet above you. The black leather skirt you wore covered very little, so short it was a wonder it covered anything at all. A white t-shirt covered in colorful paint splatters was tucked into it, covered by a leather jacket littered with patches, doodles, and pins. The fishnet tights that adorned your legs were ripped in various places and disappeared under the tops of thick black combat boots, with a belt loosely hanging around your waist that tied everything together. Your maroon painted lips curled up in a confident smile, and you winked at Steve as the two of you locked eyes. 

He was hardly able to focus on anything except you, taking note of the way your eyes closed when you got particularly into your performance, or the way your black painted nails shimmered in the light as your delicate hands wrapped around the neck of the guitar. He drowned in your cover of Pat Benatar’s Heartbreaker, and let every note flow through him and cover him like the smoke floating around his head. 45 minutes later and the set was over, much to his dismay, and he sighed as he watched you walk back through the black curtains behind you.

Fully prepared to leave and never see you again, he went on his search to find Robin, finding her engaged in a heated game of drunk Rock-Paper-Scissors with the group of girls she’d found a home with at the beginning of the night. Steve, deciding to let her be, decided to take a seat at the bar, nursing a Coke to pass the time.

“Quite the show out there tonight. The usual?” The bartender, a thin blonde woman wearing the most extravagant goth makeup Steve had ever seen, spoke to someone behind Steve’s back as she dried out one of the glasses. The woman she was speaking to sat down in the barstool next to Steve’s, leaning her top half on the bartop.

“You know me better than anyone.” The bartender nodded and smiled in response, setting off on getting you your drink. Steve glanced at you out of the corner of his eyes but didn’t say anything, much to your disappointment. “I’ve been waiting for you to say something to me all night. Figured you’d at least come a little closer to the stage.”

“Didn’t want to bother you.” He saw you swivel the barstool towards him, legs crossed and leaning one arm against the bar. 

“Pretty face like yours could never be a bother.” Steve felt the redness rush to his cheeks. “First time here?”

“Is it that obvious?” You laughed.

“Let's just say you don’t exactly look like one of the regulars here.” You thanked the bartender as she put your drink down in front of you, a red concoction of alcohol he didn’t know. You took a sip, barely flinching at what had to be heavy liquor based on the vodka bottle he’d seen the bartender pick up earlier. “Where are you from?”

“Hawkins. A couple hours away from here.”

“I’ve got family there, an uncle and a brother. Never been to a place like that, not really my thing. What brings you to Indianapolis?”  

You and Steve shared small talk for what had to have been an hour, based on how far the hands of Steve’s watch had moved, but neither of you were in a rush for the conversation to end. The conversation had quickly become flirty, a tone initiated by you, and the next thing Steve knew he was driving you back to his motel room. 

He spent the rest of the weekend traveling around Indianapolis with you, spending time at parks, restaurants, practically anywhere that provided any sort of entertainment. When he left to drive back from Hawkins, you exchanged numbers and vowed to stay in touch, and before either you knew it, you were embroiled in a 3 month long long-distance relationship. Robin often made fun of Steve for driving to Indianapolis a few times a month just to see you, but he simply ignored it and kept his usual routine. 

He was ecstatic when you called him and said you were coming down to Hawkins for a few weeks to see family, planning out everywhere he could take you in town (which really limited his options, but he was being optimistic). He really should have connected the dots when Eddie had mentioned his sister from Indianapolis was coming down to Hawkins to meet him and his uncle, but he was too clouded by hormones and his own stupidity to see the signs. 

Now here he was, sitting on top of one of the picnic tables in Eddie’s trailer park, patiently waiting for Eddie’s sister to show up. Eddie had been begging Steve and the rest of the group to meet her ever since he heard she was coming down, barely giving them a choice. Steve had been engaged in a conversation with Robin when the car pulled up, Eddie rushing forward to greet the driver. Steve froze when the door opened and she stepped out. 

“So, naturally, I said- hey, dingus, you still with me?” Robin slapped his arm to try and get his attention, and when she followed his line of sight, she practically cackled like an evil witch. 

Because you were standing there a few feet away, hugging the long lost brother you had met only a few days ago. Your brother. One of Steve’s best friends. Steve was dating his best friend’s sister. 

Oh god. 

He slapped Robin upside the head to get her to shut up, shooting down the barrage of questions now being fired at him from Nancy and Jonathan. He tried to stay casual when the two of you walked over, but the moment the two of you locked eyes, both of you went red as a tomato. 

“Steve?”

“Hey, Y/n.” Eddie’s head ping ponged back and forth between the two of you, raising an eyebrow in confusion.

“Wait, you two know each other?” Robin got up from her seat and hid the ear to ear grin on her face, tossing her empty beer can in the trash.

“I am going to go get another beer before this shit storm hits. Good luck, you two.” She held up a salute as she walked back towards the trailer. You cleared your throat, putting on the most innocent smile you could muster.

“You know that guy I was telling you about over the phone? The one I met at the bar?” Eddie still didn’t connect the dots, only looking at you with a confused expression. “Eddie, that guy was, no is, Steve.”

The words hung in the air for a second, the silence far more deafening than anything Eddie was going to say. Nancy covered her mouth in an effort to hide the laugh threatening to slip from between her lips. Jonathan’s lips were pursed to stop from smiling, and Steve could see Robin peering out from around the corner of the trailer to watch from a safe distance. When Eddie finally registered it, he clenched his fists and took a breath. 

“WHAT?” The next five minutes were a shit show. Nancy finally let out the laugh she’d been holding in, Jonathan let himself snicker and smile. Steve only sat there and flushed red as Eddie threw a variety of particularly vulgar words at him, yourself trying to hold him back and prevent anything from turning into a physical confrontation. Eventually, you dragged him back to the trailer, shutting the door behind you to shut him off from the group and calm him down. Robin came back laughing, fresh beer in hand. 

“Oh god, what are the odds?”

“I cannot believe that she’s the girl you kept talking about! You call her everyday, how did you not know?” Nancy wiped the tears from her eyes, shaking her head.

“He hasn’t just been calling her everyday, he drives there every other weekend to fuck her, too.”

“Robin! Come on, you’re just making it worse.” He held his head in his hands, trying to hide the red flush on his face. “How was I supposed to know? When she talked about her brother that lived in Hawkins I never thought she was talking about Eddie!”

“Yes, because it’s so difficult to figure out when Eddie also kept talking about his sister from Indianapolis.” Robin rolled her eyes. Steve sat there for a second and sighed.

“Wow, I am an idiot.”

“I wasn’t gonna say it.”

A few moments later, he heard the door of Eddie’s trailer open and then slam shut, looking up to see Eddie stalking towards him, red in the face. He braced himself for something along the lines of a punch, but Eddie only pressed a finger to his chest.

“You do anything to her and I swear to god, I’ll kill you.” Steve only offered a nervous nod in response, watching as Eddie sighed and shook his head. You appeared behind him, biting your bottom lip. “God, I need a drink.” 

When Eddie left, you approached Steve, letting out a relieved sigh and a smile.

“Hi.” He smiled at you. 

“Hi.” You shoved your hands in your pants pockets, rocking back and forth nervously. “If I’d known, I would have told you. I told Eddie he couldn’t blame you, since he never even told you my name. And I guess since I never told you his.”

“Well, let’s just hope the awkwardness has faded.” The two of you shared a laugh, and then fell into introductions and re-introductions with the rest of the group sitting at the table. Despite a few sideways glances from Eddie, the rest of the afternoon went smoothly, and by the time the sun dipped below the horizon, you were relishing in the feeling of family.

And hey, at least you wouldn’t have to go through the awkwardness of introducing Steve to your family, considering he already knew them.

[writing-with-rain]

"Firsts"

Bluepulse Week 2023; Day 1

Dec. 10, 2023

"Young Justice"

Summary: Bart is more than excited for the night ahead, practically vibrating through the floor with every passing second – very slow seconds, he unfortunately laments. This evening, at 5 on the dot, Bart is expecting a knock on the door from his favorite hero in Blue. Sure, his feelings had been conflicting when he had first arrived, Jaime was cute, but Bart had a mission, one that centered around blue and black clad hero he stuck so close to, but dangers had since past, and Bart had found it harder to ignore that gnawing thought. And finally, finally, Bart was going to be going on his first date, both in general and with Jaime. 

Time moves quicker than his own internal clock. 

Bart knows this. Every speedster knows this. Even Don and Dawn, in all this small toddler minded glory, are grasping at the concept that time just moves differently for them. After all, super speed was never just that. 

But this was getting ridiculous. It was as if the world had caught a whiff of his excitement for the night and personally pulled on the reins of time to slow it to less than a trickle. He had been staring at this clock for the last two hours (it had been 2 minutes), and still he seemed no closer to the hour hand landing on the 5 as it was supposed to. 

Jay, who had been all too amused with the situation, had left the doorway he had been standing in – so when Bart let out another over exaggerated sigh there was nothing but a laugh from the older man two rooms over. 

“The clock isn’t gonna get to 5 any faster.” 

Bart’s face scrunched at the comment. “It will if I move the hand.” 

“Don’t you dare, besides,” Jay chimed as he entered Bart’s line of sight once more, “it won’t make Jaime get here earlier.” 

Bart didn’t give more than another annoyed huff, rolling over on his bed and facing the wall. 

“You’ll mess your hair up, Bart,” Jay called, walking back to the kitchen. “Again!” 

He couldn’t help but laugh at that, sitting up and glancing in a mirror to run a hand through his hair once more in a half-hearted attempt to tame it. As unruly as it could be, he did want to look presentable for his first date. Especially when that date was supposed to be with Jaime. 

It was a lulling thought for the moment, a flash flood of memories and emotions in quick succession. 

Too skinny Bart Allen had managed to get to the past, with the sole mission of stopping the Reach apocalypse at any cost. And then he had been face-to-face with The Blue Beetle and hadn’t even realized it at first. His one-track mind had been faster than he was and soon enough Bart had been spending as much time with one Jaime Reyes as he could. But then things had gotten a little complicated – Bart had never let himself become too comfortable with the past, not until he was sure it was fixed, but that hadn’t stopped those little budding feelings from taking root in his brain, deeper and deeper, every time he was around Jaime. 

Small things he did, the way he laughed or the way he rolled his eyes and looked away to hide his smile every time Bart cracked a particularly bad joke were imprinted in his head. And then the speedster caught himself doing it on purpose, just to try and get one more smile or one more laugh out of his friend. 

Surprisingly, the first time he had caught himself calling Jaime his friend, the realization didn’t set him on edge. It had felt completely normal. All of it did, along with those little nudges of protectiveness that he embraced in full force. 

It the Reach was going to take Jaime from him, or even Khaji Da, they were going to have to take Bart out kicking and screaming first. 

And nobody could say that the speedster hadn’t stuck to his guns the moment he decided he was going to pour everything into protecting Jaime – throwing those (now not so reasonable) alternatives to the wind. 

He had. 

He had given every bit of himself to making sure he brought Jaime home. And Jaime had been there for him just as much when Bart was left reeling at the sacrifices it cost. That the Reach had cost them. 

That was how things had stayed for a time. With everyone just figuring out how to heal, and how to navigate a new kind of normal. 

But caught up in his own world and stretched like a starfish across his bed, Bart hadn’t realized that father time had finally gotten around to granting his wish, with the hour hand finally ticking gently over the 5. His mind was still a mile away before he was jolted back to the present by a swift knock on the front door. 

Jay hadn’t even moved from his spot to answer it, knowing Bart would be there faster than a heartbeat. And he was, swinging the door open with a smile bright enough to put the sun to shame. 

For what it was worth, Jaime returned the look with upmost adoration, taking a moment to just look at Bart before the speedster was nudging them out the door; he knew full and well Jay was going to try getting photos for Iris, Bart had heard the conversation earlier over the phone. 

Thankfully Jaime let Bart drag him along without a fuss, following in quick step next to the younger of the pair. “You look good.” 

“Don’t I always?” 

Jaime could only roll his eyes and scoff, “let me compliment you, chiquito.” 

Bart shrugged, looking away as the two made their way down the street and headed further into the city. “It just feels a bit different now, you know?” When he glanced back over to Jaime it wasn’t hard to miss the soft smile on his face. 

“I get it,” he cast a lazy glance over at Bart, meeting his eyes for the first time. “I spent two hours picking my clothes before Mils started making fun of me for worrying.” 

That was an easy scene to picture, Milagro sticking her head into Jaime’s room or sitting on the bed and poking fun at him before he chased her out of the room, or his mom can up to collect her. It was endearing either way it would have played out. 

“I would have thought you looked good either way?” 

“Sure, but you dressed up for our date,” Jaime chimed, knocking shoulders with him for the moment. 

“I had Iris to worry about.” Instead of pulling away, Bart slips his hand into Jaime’s to intertwine their fingers. 

“You’re doing it again.” 

“What?” Bart asks, genuinely puzzled. 

Jaime swings their hands absentmindedly as they continue, taking the lead. “Your nose is scrunched up again, you’re overthinking.” 

Bart hums in acknowledgment. “I’ve been thinking about it since you asked me out -” 

“Since you almost jumped me about it,” Jaime corrects with a sly grin. 

“Since you asked me.” He huffs. “But are things going to change between us? Like, a lot - because what we have is pretty crash.” 

Jaime was quiet for a moment, tugging Bart closer until he was tucked comfortably against his side. “I don’t think it’s going to change as much as you’re worried about.” 

“Good, because I like us.” 

Jaime couldn’t help but smile once again, his hand slipping from Bart’s to tighten around his waist as he dragged him forward for their date. “I like us too.” 

[princesscolumbia]

Pride Month 2024 - Day 9

I have had 10 hours of sleep in the last 48...welcome to parenthood.

And now, get ready for a good egg cracking AU!

Return to Recipient

Summary:

Ranma hasn't been feeling right for as long as he can remember, and he just figured that's normal. But after Jusenkyo, and especially after Jusendo, the feeling of "wrongness" has been getting more and more noticeable... ...because he doesn't feel it in his cursed form. He continues to just cope, keeping his struggle to himself, until he finds a letter tucked into his old travel pack addressed to him, written by him, from a 48 hour period that he doesn't remember and nobody will talk to him about.

Notes:

During the writing of 🔞 And at This Point I'm Afraid to Ask 🔞, [NOTE - Yeah, these two are being posted in "most recently updated" order, so the fic that came first is being posted tomorrow for this little calendar event -Helen] I realized I was speed-running Ranma's egg-to-hatched trans journey and made an author's note of that. In the comments for that work, I got a note bemoaning the fact that I didn't spend more time on Ranma's realization, coming out, and social transition as a woman while understanding my reasoning. I replied stating that I needed a good hook, something that hadn't been hammered to death by other authors, and at the time I didn't have anything. I really got it in my head that I should do something, so I posted to Tumblr and started putting it out to the universe that I was Poly Transwoman Author Seeking Story Inspiration and Motivation, in Open Relationship with current WIPs. I was scrolling through the "Ranma 1/2" tag this morning trying to find something I hadn't read when I bumped into Dear Diary by JaquiK. I've read it, of course, and it's short and, for what it sets out to do, good. "Feels like it needs more," says I, "Wish the author would continue it, make something more of it than they did." The little author that lives in my head rent free and looks remarkably like Ranma-chan ran up behind me and socked me in the back of my head, "Dummy! There's your plot hook!" Then she backed a dump truck up and dropped about 3/4 of a story's worth of ideas on me. [*le-gasp* It me! -Christy] With the 2023 holidays in full swing (it's Cyber Monday as I type this) I'm not sure how quickly I'll get to outlining this or getting chapters 2-5 out (my personal metric for whether the author is serious about a work is if they have 5 chapters out. This has been a solid rule of thumb for long-form fiction and hasn't failed me regardless of fandom), but I wanted to get at least chapter 1 out as quickly as possible. Tags will be added as I add more chapters, mostly because my writing process means I'm not sure what tags will apply until I'm writing something that necessitates them. 😋 I hope you enjoy it.

Obviously, at 6 chapters and 35.5k words, I've met my own personal metric for being serious about a work. 😉

This one is a particular pride and joy, and I hope that people reading it are getting the 'gag' of the title and the chapter titles. While not all the chapter titles are home runs, I have put a lot of thought into making them meaningful to the story as a whole. For example, the title itself, "Return to Recipient" is a play on the postal service standard, "Return to Sender" (and, yes, made a cultural signpost by that one song by Elvis). In the case of the "sender" of the letter that kicks the whole fic off in chapter 1 no longer exists. And, yes, I could have gone with the now-standard practice of making "that girl" an alt in the system known as Ranma, but that wasn't what this fic was about. This is about Ranma's transition as prompted by her own self demanding she be true unto. And that version was a result of a dissociative episode caused by injury and never properly treated, requiring Ranma's rapid healing (likely qi assisted) to repair the damage...and part of that damage was the entire mental state triggered by the injury. (And, again, the bigger questions of whether that was a separate entity that deserved a life to live are outside the scope of this fic...or is it? 😉) So if Ranma, theoretically, wanted to return the letter to the sender, she'd be returning it to...herself, the recipient. Therefor, "Return to Recipient."

In the spirit of things being spoilertastic without revealing too much in these posts, I present to you the chapter title list:

Note to Self

Doctor's Note

Passing Notes

A Noteable Occation

Akane One Note

A Note on Shampoo's File

Notes, Beats, and Measures

Back of the Napkin Notes

Notes from Abroad

Navigational Notation

Autographs on Notebook Paper

Veterinary Notes

Bank Notes

A Noteworthy Event

Self-Analysis Notes

Ending on a High Note

Epilogue - [REDACTED]

The blue are already published, enjoyable speculation on the rest is welcome in the notes. 😁

[straightbaittournament]

only the option with the lowest percentage will be eliminated! propaganda under the cut (and more is always welcome!):

tim drake and stephanie brown:

Tim and Steph are a thing for most of their history. Then stuff happens and they break up and soon after that Tim is confirmed to be bi and starts dating Bernard (former random side character who nobody thought would ever be relevant again)

lisa cuddy and gregory house:

The show spends 7 seasons hinting that House is going to end up with Cuddy, and then writes her out in season 7. In the finale, he has a flashback of people who impacted his life and she doesn’t even show If House and Wilson can’t be together, then House and Cuddy should

nell serrano and edward:

Not Dead Yet? More like Not Together Yet

ash ketchum and misty:

They’re basically set up as a kind of enemies to friends story and they make recurring jokes about how she clearly has a big crush on him, but nothing ever happens My childhood, i shipped them when I was 10

matthew and mary crawley:

They spend multiple seasons full of tension to get their happy ever after. There are so many tropes used between these two. They finally get their shit together and get married, and then have a beautiful child together. Matthew is so happy about his child being born that he doesn't pay attention to the road and fucking DIES IN A CAR CRASH. And that's how their story ends. It makes me so livid every time I think about it lol they really killed him off like that right after and I mean RIGHT AFTER his child is born. It's so foul and every man that they set Mary up with after that doesn't feel nearly the same

maka albarn and soul evans:

Throughout the series, they have a deep friendship with each other which is consistently extremely important to the story's narrative. In order for them to be able to fight, they must get along and resonate with each other, and due to the mechanics of their world, fighting independently of each other is extremely difficult. In multiple instances, they are shown to be willing to put themselves in harm's way to extreme degrees to keep each other safe. They are even shown to live together. They are The Singular Straight Ship I have ever shipped and I love them. Also they are really cool and Soul can turn into an awesome scythe weapon that like only Maka can wield. And they fight really awesomely together.

grace blackthorn and christopher lightwood:

Okay so basically in Shadowhunters there was this family tree, and on it it stated that Christopher and Grace got married and had a kid. And in the book series they were just good friends. Cassandra Clare (the author) has said it’s inaccurate. But like cmon you said they were going to get married 😭😭

kipo oak and benson mekler:

It only lasts a few episodes, but this is a very clear INTENTIONAL straight bait from the writers, as it's a female main character with a male major supporting character, and Benson even takes Kipo to a carnival, which Kipo interprets as a date, until she confesses attraction to him, where he tells her he's gay and just wants to be friends.

cali and flynn:

It starts off as a one-sided crush on Flynn’s side, and later becomes mutual when Cali develops feelings for him in the Skylanders IDW spin-off comics, their romantic tension lasts for most of the franchise (five games, a chapter of a spin-off comic, and a few bits and pieces in the spin-off books and mobile games), so far they’ve never gotten together as the franchise is currently still in hiatus mode (says this while on extreme copium) I think we need to appreciate the tropes in Calynn: Opposites Attract, Tough Girl x Himbo, Smart x Dumb, “You’re stupid, I like that in a man” vibes all over this ship! Seven year old me didn’t see Cali calling Flynn her guy in the sky whilst Flynn looked at her with heart eyes to lose to some other pairing!

good luck everyone! now go vote!

[weed-ols]

Reviewing Every UKISS Release: By Unpopular Demand

Nobody asked for this, I don't even think anybody wants this, but I have a voice, and I'm gonna use it while I have a mild mental breakdown over how long it's taking me to rip their concert DVDs and consequently breaking my only USB and therefore forcing me to shell out even more money after splurging on them. Like it's fine, it only took me two hours to rip Action after spending an hour fiddling with the damn DVD reader before giving up and using a busted old laptop.

Anyway.

So to start, some general opening remarks about this whole unasked project, some rules or whatever:

They have a ton of music. I saw someone on twitter mention it a while back, but after writing down everything I need to listen to, it's a lot. There's about 11 studio albums, 13 mini albums (granted, one is a Christmas repackage + 2 new songs), and a bunch of JP singles (most of which made it into albums, but still they had to promo those).

I have no idea what to classify their clothing album Only You as. It's only 4 songs long, but I feel like that's enough to call it a mini album/extended play/whatever? Also, it has like no presence whatsoever on YouTube or Spotify, and the only reason I remember it exists is because for some reason I have the album art on a random USB (not the one I broke).

Neither Spotify nor YouTube Music have their full discography. Spotify is missing all their JP releases prior to Panic (meaning we're missing the Christmas album and a lot of b-sides), while YouTube Music has their JP discography, but is missing Collage, Moments (funny enough, the Mysterious Lady single is still there), Mono Scandal (which was there right up until last week).

While hunting for some of their music, I found an OT6 version of Ready For U that someone mixed, and I also found out there's a version of OT6 RUN A WAY, but I don't think it exists anywhere publicly.

A lot of their songs have a bunch of different versions, courtesy of their unstable lineups, but I probably won't touch on all of them. A lot of them are from their concerts, so maybe if I do concert reviews if the DVDs start cooperating, and I'm not masochistic enough to sit through every single ManManHaNi performance.

I won't do their JP singles separately, I'll do the entire album, then do the b-sides grouped by album release.

Format is something along the lines of -- actual music, music video(s), and music show stages. I found my feelings varied quite a bit from music-music video-music show due to costuming and choreo.

This is mostly for archival purposes, as in I'm just dumping all the info I know on these releases here for myself, and whomever finds it helpful. A lot of things are from my own memories from back in the day, so they might not be totally accurate since a lot of the sources are gone. Feel free to add/correct if the 10 Kissmes on here are willing.

[filet-o-feelings]

7. To shut them up -- David & Patrick please :)

I'm so sorry this has taken me 6 weeks to write! My brain has not been cooperative at all, lately, but thanks so much for the prompt, anon! I hope this is okay, I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it but it got me out of my head about Library Boy for a bit and I'm happy to have written some words today!

Patrick glances past the customer he’s ringing up and watches as David continues to pace back and forth across the store. He’s wishing they were busier today, not even for the business (which is always welcome) but simply to keep David occupied.

He’s been at it all morning - what’s left of morning after he strolled in at 10:00 with a coffee and a tea for Patrick, and a bag of pastries he’s been stress eating between laps.

When the store is empty of customers, he mumbles his anxieties, and sometimes the mumbles turn into full volume rants directed at nobody or Patrick, he’s not sure.

“David,” Patrick starts as the door closes behind the latest customer, “it’s going to be fine. This is not doing you any good.”

“What else am I supposed to do then?” David shouts, and Patrick frowns. He never takes David’s shouting personally; it’s just how his anxiety manifests. Patrick counters with a calm tone, stepping out from behind the counter.

“We’re going to run out of body milk before the next shipment is ready, and Alexis hasn’t been answering my calls or texts all day and who knows what trouble she’s getting up to in New York and I can’t afford to save her like I used to and the house needs so much work and it’s just never going to end,” David continues, summing up the biggest of his worries in one frantic breath.

“Hey, if we run out of body milk that means it’s selling well, and that’s a good thing. We’ll order extra next month, it’s not the end of the world. Alexis can take care of herself, you know that. She’s grown up a lot since you had to rescue her, and from what you’ve both told me, she could handle herself just fine back then, too.”

“Okay, maybe you’re right, but the house-”

“The house will be fine, David. This is home ownership. We own a house! A house where I get to spend all of my free time with you, creating a life together. A house where I get to take care of you, love you. We have a solid roof over our heads and a comfy couch we can curl up together on while we watch the game tonight.”

“Game? What game? Patrick, I’m freaking out here and you want to watch the baseball?”

“I do, I do want to watch the baseball, because there’s nothing we can do about the things you’re freaking out about right now. They’ll work out. We’ll talk to Ronnie about helping out with some of the house stuff. Alexis will answer you when she can, she’s probably out doing amazing things that will make you proud.”

“I don’t know, Patrick, I don’t know what to do!” David throws his hands in the air and starts pacing again, mumbling some more. Patrick sighs before stepping forward to follow him. When David reaches the wall and turns around, Patrick is there to catch him.

“Hey, David, sweetheart,” he says, placing a hand on David’s arm.

David opens his mouth, eyes wild with anxiety, ready to spout off another list of things out of his control, to which Patrick rolls his eyes, grabs David’s shoulders and pulls him in, stopping the words in their tracks. He swears he can feel David’s anxiety melt away under his touch. He’s kissed his husband a thousand times, but he’ll never tire of the feel of David’s lips on his. He’d be lying if he said he only kissed David now to stop him from spiraling any further; it does the trick, sure, but it grounds Patrick just as much.

And for a moment, they both forget about inventory, and a sister who’s too busy to answer her phone, and an old house in need of repairs. They also forget that they’re store owners, in the middle of their store, during business hours, making out in front of the floor to ceiling windows in full view of the town.

When the bell signals someone entering the store, they’re both relieved and irritated when it turns out to be Stevie.

also on AO3

[the-apples-were-monitored]

general rules for customers in a retail store that actually make our lives so much easier:

i've been in retail most of my working career and people do some fucked up things that i'm just like...okay i was basically raised by wolves and i would never do some of the shit you guys do (talking to you, lady who left bloody tampon underwear in the tj maxx fitting room). so here are rules to behave in public just in case you didn't know.

(1) if you don't want to put something back where you found it, give it to one of us. flag us down or give it to us at checkout. it saves us time and doesn't make the store look trashed. throwing it in a random place means we have to spend more than an hour after we close the store hunting for out of place items and putting them back. i've heard people claim they're doing this to help us have jobs. putting aside that it doesn't even make sense, no the fuck you're not. you're not thinking of job creation when you put something in the wrong spot, you're not thinking of anything. you're being lazy. we're literally not even mad at you if you give it to us. some us us work 3 jobs or have kids to pick up or have chronic disabilities and want to go home. please don't make us have to spend time cleaning up after you. (also why do some of you put something almost in the right spot when the correct peg is right next to it? it's not so hard to just put it in the correct spot.)

(2) don't just throw shit on the ground. i work in a halloween store and people throw masks and hats on the ground. that's gross. would you want to buy a mask people might've been stepping on? why are you throwing it on the ground when you can put it back?

(3) things that go on pegs have holes at the top of the packaging. those holes are used to slide onto the pegs. don't put a mask on the peg by hanging it from the elastic band or by putting the mask itself on it. the cardboard packaging is what goes on the peg. it's not that hard.

(4) if you pulled something out of the costume, we're not asking you to refold everything and make it nice (nobody has time for that) but please put it back in the package and don't throw it on the floor. i know the packaging can be a bit confusing but slide the cardboard piece in first, then put the clothes in the side that doesn't have the picture so other customers can still see what kind of costume it is and so it doesn't look like trash.

(5) don't touch animatronics you haven't paid for. they're fragile and we have 5 broken ones. no you can't pull the face off an animatronic to use as a halloween costume

(6) this one isn't exclusive to halloween stores but go a month early to get stuff for holidays. if you wait til the week before or god forbid the day of any holiday, the good stuff will be sold out and it will be your own fault. by the time halloween rolls around, most major retailers have backrooms full of thanksgiving and christmas. there's no sense in getting mad at us for not having anything good left the day of.

(7) please don't walk in wearing nothing but a banana hammock. can't believe i need to say this

(8) if a store has what looks like low shelving in front of the register that's in a maze shape, they want you to walk through the maze to get to the register. yes it's partially to tempt you with useless items but the maze shape helps lines not get super out of control. if you just have an uncontained clump of a line, the store can get confusing and crowded very quickly. making the line wind through the maze gets more people into a smaller space. please don't just cut to the front even if it looks like no one is in line. go through the maze. and if you have to wait in line, wait at the end of the maze, do not just stand directly behind someone. give them space while they make a transaction. can't believe this has to be said. i miss when we had rules to stand 6 feet apart sometimes.

(9) retail employees are not responsible for an item being out of stock or your card not being accepted

(10) check your coupons to make sure they're not out of date and don't expect employees to have extras at the register

(11) put down your phone during the checkout process that's super rude oh my god

(12) pay attention in line. don't stand in a clump talking. don't mosey over super slowly either, move in a timely fashion because people are waiting behind you

(13) don't hit on employees unless you know them

(14) make sure you had money cashapped to you before you get to the register. don't hold up the line by calling someone to get money

(15) don't be gross. the fitting room is no place to clip toenails or masturbate

(16) store policy isn't the fault of the employees. return policies don't always mean you have a few days from time of purchase to bring it back. particularly with seasonal stores or holiday items, the receipt will specify that there is no money back on those items after a certain point because the odds of selling that stuff after the holiday is very slim.

these are such simple rules. wish people would follow them.

[worstlovesong]

asks for distractions: what are your favourite lucy lyrics? (solo + boygenius inclusive!)

Thank youuu <3 I apologize in advance for anyone who thought I could be normal about this because I am simply Insane about Lucy’s writing <3

“We had a lot to measure / We had more past than pleasure / And time grows deep like weeds” - Dream state…

This song hits me hard post-bad-friendship but this lyric sticks with me. Realizing that even if there was a lot of memories built with someone, they may not be Good Ones. Realizing after the fact that perhaps the time spent together wasn’t as good as it once seemed. Time is always moving forward and now that you’re away from them, you’re left with a mind full of invasive weeds to pluck through in search of new growth.

“If beauty is the only way / To make the nightmares go away / I'll plant a garden in your brain / And let the roots absorb the pain” - Trust

This chorus makes me so !!!!! Like oh my god. It’s just beautiful, it’s a promise of a loved one wanting to ease your pain and soothe your fears in the gentlest way. It’s a promise to yourself, to find beauty in the world and hold onto it because then there’s a reason to keep going.

“Don't hold your breath, forget you ever saw me at my best / You don't deserve what you don't respect / Don't deserve what you say you love and then neglect” - Night Shift

This song in its entirety is just a fucking masterpiece. I love it so much and I struggle to express why. This part specifically gets across exactly what I want to say to someone who hurt me and it honestly helps me reframe my thoughts because No this person does not deserve me at my best or at all because they did not respect or love me like they said they did ‼️

“Believe me, I'm speaking plainly and painfully/Trying to stay elegant, eloquent and delicate to you” - Body to Flame

This one just scratches my brain tbh. This whole song is beautiful and just the very human concept of knowing someone so well and yet somehow not fully understanding them because we are all so unpredictable

“The future isn't worth its weight in gold / The future is a benevolent black hole” - Cartwheel

Not being ready to face the future, especially when it takes things and people away from you. Change is hard, change is scary, change is autism’s worst nightmare (and therefore mine). Yet she also implies that the future, while vast and unknown and forcing change, is not inherently evil. The future can bring good things, even if you’re not ready for it.

“I wanna run my fingers through you / You say nobody understands you like I do” - Partner in Crime

Once again this just makes my brain go ‼️

“You called me cerebral / I didn't know what you meant / But now I do, would it have killed you / To call me pretty instead?” -Brando

This line and I Don’t Wanna Be Funny Anymore hit me for the same reasons. Growing up being forced into the role of the funny one or the smart one but I was never pretty. It’s just that frustration with people who can’t even bother to give straightforward praise/compliments, calling you an old soul or wise for your age or cerebral. What does that even mean, when you’re 10 years old and just like to read books but they paint you as a scholar or you’re 15 and you’ve never had someone other than your grandmother tell you you’re beautiful. Like goddamn just let me be pretty for once.

“I'm staring at my hands / Red, ruddy skin, I don't understand / How did they betray me? What did I do?” - Triple Dog Dare

After I came out to my family at 15 years old I wasn’t allowed to see my friends outside of school for months. I internalized it, I mean I was still dealing with severe internalized homophobia from the church and I thought it must be My Fault. I remember apologizing to my friends, crying, because I wasn’t allowed to come over or hang out with them. As if it was my fault. I would spend hours regretting coming out, wondering what I did that was so wrong. This line just sits in my brain and wow Lucy Dacus is just like me fr

“I want you to tell me that you miss me / Want you to hold and hurt and kiss me / I wanna run away and live on your family's boat” - Triple Dog Dare

As you can tell by my pinned post I have Feelings about this verse. I’ve posted about this before but this song is the perfect example of young queer love and how adults interfere and see it as impure. This line specifically just highlights that need to be with that person, for them to hold you and kiss you and even if they’re hurting you at least it’s proof they’re there. The need to to run away with them because even if you’re missing at least you’re together in the end. God this song makes me fucking feral.

“But it feels good to be known so well / I can't hide from you like I hide from myself / I remember who I am when I'm with you / Your love is tough, your love is tried and true-blue” -True Blue

I’m really gay and I love my girlfriend <3

But also like this song just fucking hits oh my god. Being known and loved by someone in a way that is so genuine, so honest, so raw. The parts of yourself you are ashamed of they embrace openly. A dependable and honest love that makes you remember yourself, truly see yourself.

“I wanna live a vibrant life / But I wanna die a boring death”

AND

“Oh, it hurts to hope for more / Oh, it hurts to hope the future / Will be better than before” - Afraid of Heights

I remember after my first listen of this song I just sat there stunned, crying. This song is so dear to me and Lucy has my entire heart. I relate to the concept of a toxic friendship in which the person pushes your boundaries and shames you for them. Every word of this song resonates and I’m so tired so I don’t think I can do it justice but I truly have many thoughts on it.

The wish to just live a bright and exciting life but not die in a risky, stressful, painful way. The pain of the unknown, of the future, once again going back to the benevolent black hole. Just hoping that one day things will be better because it’s all you can hold on to but it hurts so much some days

This got so long 🫠 I recognize I have a problem and I just want y’all to know I love Lucy Dacus she’s everything to me <33

[rowavolo]

hi were you aware you are the FUNNIEST person on my dashboard by the way? i haven’t thought about pfps or them of me (I AM NOW THINKING ABOUT BOTH HOWEVER) but i do have a full list of my contacts of them ! i have gone into detail about my reasoning and also cannot stop talking about these guys so this ask is likely 3 miles long. anyway

the one gc with a solid name is “sweet tooth,” with barbatos, luke, n i. based on ‘sweet tooth’ and the fact that i feel my ability to bake would SKYROCKET if i had their numbers. there’s one with lucifer and dia that’s essentially just the ship name and whether or not they realize the significance beyond just “oh it’s our names” is constantly up in the air.

lucifer — ‘COLOGNE(?!)’ to ‘inkwell’. he 100% has a very distinctive cologne, i know you can tell him apart in a dark room. he uses fountain pens for official documents still (a mishap has been caused where one of his bottles spilled over his suit)(don’t ask)(satan may or may not have been involved) and at some point the name had to change. i also just think it’s a sweet nickname.

mammon — ‘monopoly man’ to ‘anklet haver’. his pants are never short enough to see it but he always manages to wear one. it’s like a shiny jumpscare. the first time i saw it it sparked a half hour discussion and the consequential contact change. he was only mildly upset (they don’t have monopoly)(he didn’t know what it meant outside of maybe ‘monopolizing time’ which is the cause of his problem with it)(stop fussing this isn’t some declaration i’ll never spend time with you again)(his contact for me after this is probably ‘anklet.’ he insists it’s because of like manacles cause “you’re always botherin me” but nobody buys it)

levi — ‘levi-fi’ to ‘jean main :/‘ after i put genshin in yet another media because he got lucky one time and it has become his entire genshin career. i like to think he’s biased towards turn-based strategies, stuff with very obvious and clear cut metas, so he probably didn’t pick up genshin (he does know a few characters and their surface lore, owns an acrylic stand of like keqing maybe, but nothing in depth) until i brought it up. i need to talk w him for hours about lore it would be good for my mental health

satan — sebastian, at first. autocorrect from a poorly written attempt at his name that stuck. he gets confused because ‘that’s not my name, and it’s not a joke, so why is it my contact?’ and after explaining it we both start to periodically change the other’s contact to be something further and further away from their name each time. think of the barnacle codswallop joke but taken to the extreme because it’s him and i’m me and we both quietly one up each other by sending screenshots of the new contact.

asmo — cycles ‘PINK(IE)’ and ‘dni after 10pm’. both are self explanatory and said affectionately. he gets mock offended whenever it’s the second one (“is my contact set to dni” “yeah” “so you hate me?” “asmo.”) and changes the heart in my contact (you know there is one) to a 💔 every time he notices. he doesn’t fix it until i, direct quote, “kiss it better.” despite his phrasing it typically is just his excuse to take me to a cafe for a while or something

beel — ‘chef gordon’ to ‘nokia brick.’ can he cook? yes. does he? not often, he’d rather eat the raw ingredients. was just brick but it was soon discovered he can navigate the most complicated uis to order his lunch but he has no idea how to like. change his brightness. it doesn’t bother him so he never looked it up.

belphie — ‘totally not suspicious’ to ‘pillow princess’ change after an invisible arc that the devs didn’t decide to show where [i devolve into an irritated blur about chapter 16]

luke — macaro(o?)n. i still forget which ones which. i think it would be fun to call him so he’d have to explain it out of his Baker Pride or something. he feels like the type to send you 10 links to various cooking sources if you ask “how do i make scrambled eggs” because he doesn’t know which one you mean.

simeon — golden bunny. bunny is autocorrect from ‘bonnie,’ logic is angel -> michael -> william. sidenote but he’d either get so startled at jumpscares or he’d be completely stonefaced and both are hilarious outcomes. levi is very conflicted about this (can’t criticize him, he’d die, but also very confused about the situation)

barbatos — barbie girl 💞💞💞. self explanatory. this one starts fights sometimes (/silly)

diavolo — ‘princiPAL’ to ‘dewdrop’ after a friendship arc. no justification i just think it’s cute and fits him :]

barbatos naming his close contacts after tea is brilliant and i am stealing it. if you’d like to use this ask to share your headcanons about their little mannerisms pretty please feel free to share!!! id love to hear them :]

- blue !

WAAAAH thank you i do enjoy making people smile/laugh . also thank you for this ask being so long its been so delightful to read over :D sorry my reply is going to be about the same length because im so AWWAAWWAAWAAA over your ideas honestly

sweet tooth is SUCH a fun group chat name . yall better make sure to share those sweets with me okay /silly

also subtly not-so-subtly shipping diavolo and lucifer to their faces is so funny. i feel like lucifer would Know but he doesnt want to admit that he knows or bring it up at all in case it makes dia uncomfy sdkfjhkds

i really like those lucifer ideas. he definitely wears a very distinctive cologne . the only thing i can liken it to (to me at least) is the way gin feels going down your throat, but like . in smell form instead, if that makes sense?? and inkwell is so fitting but simultaneously i feel like hed be Cross over it (but only on a surface level. if somebody else notices it he gets all grumpy but as long as its just you hes cool with it)

im losing my mind at the idea of mammon wearing an anklet . when i first read the nickname my brain immediately went to those house arrest anklets people wear. like, lucifer putting one on him because mamms is a mischievous little guy. HIM BEING HTE MONOPOLY MAN IS SO FUNNY TO ME ACTUALLY . you know he always insists on being the banker when you introduce everyone to the game and skims cash off the top, citing "interest" and "handling fees" and the like.

YEAH yeah in my brain i want levi to be into genshin but i think hes kind of blase about playing it regularly. he plays the occasional event and will hyperfixate on it once every few months and catch up, and also log in to spend all his money on characters he thinks are Neat (or that he's read are going to be the New Amazing Awesome Cool OverPowered Meta Guys) . he seems like an enjoyer of all the most 'typical' genshin characters, like keqing, ganyu, ayaka, raiden shogun and kokomi . like thats the extent for him sjdkhkjsd

i love the imagery of satan initially being Mildly Annoyed and Confused but the moment he's let in on the joke he's fully on board. i feel like he's that way with a lot of things, he just loathes being excluded and doesn't know how to word it so he gets snippy or even just downright mad. i could also see satan assigning haikus to peoples contact descriptions that get increasingly more ridiculous as he comes up with them.

Asmo's are so fun and silly too, i feel like he gets so grumpy if you message him too late or too early so the DNI is totally warranted but hes SUUUCH a bad sport about it . he WILL whine about it to an absurd extent. i can totally see him having hearts in almost everyone's contact name but he has this whole dictionary in his brain of the different heart emojis and their meanings . (i was gonna say something about yours being blue (because of the nickname you chose) but honestly i associate you with more of a minty green ?? not sure why. its a compliment though!) i just love asmo being SUCH a drama queen but like you know that he knows that you dont actually hate him and arent mad at him he just plays it up, its like an intricate game of cat and mouse to him. he plays the damsel in distress and you have to go save him from the evil dragon ( the fake villainous version of you that he basically made up for the funny)

IM REALLY OBSESSED WITH BEEL BEING NOKIA BRICK. THERES SOMETHING SO AMUSING ABOUT THAT TO ME. i read it initially more in the sense that he can take anything that's thrown at him (or that he gets thrown at) without a scratch . man can eat all kinds of weird nasty food without even BLINKING. the idea that he can hardly use technology simply because he doesnt really Care is also very amusing to me. hes the epitome of "damn bitch you live like this?" because he just doesnt care to learn about the things that he doesnt feel are necessary (a complete opposite to belphie, who must have everything Just Right or else he goes bonkers insane. beel will learn to do things for belphies sake i think).

Belphie is so pillow princess coded honestly, youre so right. i do not blame you for being irritated about chapter 16 it is so. its so. it is. yep. like. sorry solmare these characters are mine now ill develop them good and also not flanderise them so its okay.

ok i think macaroons are the chewy ones, and macarons are the meringue ones. i love luke so much i feel like he's a chronic over-explainer like. you ask him where a place is and he's like "oh its in this place thats sort of near this other place, do you remember when we did (xyz)? yeah its kinda adjacent to there but also not really. the building next to it is this colour and sometimes they have a sign outside oh but also sometimes they dont so its like... yeah." and you find out its like the biggest building on the main street and its just like . "dude why didnt you just say that" and he just shrugs because he genuinely didnt think about it in that way . hes a very visual thinker and he has to explain every little detail forever or else he loses his little mind (yes im projecting no i dont take constructive criticism )

calling barbatos barbie and barbie girl genuinely always SLAUGHTERS me its so so funny . come on barbie lets go party <3 . i feel like the best solution to that starting fights is to mention it to diavolo who will then be Ecstatic at the realisation because he loves barbie and suddenly he will ONLY call barbatos 'barbie' and oh boy you have opened pandora's box there barbs would NOT be happy sjkhfks

princiPAL made me giggle a lot its so silly and fun. dewdrop is also an ADORABLE name for him he is soooo dewdrop coded to me . i feel like dia loves the first one especially because he loves goofy puns and also knowing that people think of him in like a friendly light. he aches to be approachable and friendlike as opposed to a Distant Unapproachable Demon King Grr Scary

thank you so much again for sharing all of this with me, it was so so fun to read and respond to i feel like we are So on the same wavelength about a lot of things and its really delighting me :D

[darlenealive]

Back from my Scandi vacation!

Felt like I took it for granted leaving my brain back in SG and letting Ax do the planning and the navigating. I brought my spirits though! Spending my day off today looking back at the trip which was such a great use of my time. Really appreciating this extra day off after my vacation.

Some tips for Norway and Denmark travels first

1. It's cashless even in the small towns. Cash was more of a liability as it forced us to spend it all

2. Hotels cost as much as Airbnb for 2 pax so opt for hotels as there's guaranteed shampoo, soap, hair dryer, heating and laundry. Most of our airbnbs were missing soap or shampoo which we didn't bring any of, in order to travel lighter. The bnbs we stayed in were also commercialised houses so there's absolutely no feelings attached. Checking in and out would also be more convenient with hotels. We had to return one of our keys from a convenience store which wasn't open in the early morning, in time for our flight.

3. Groceries are marked down on Friday if they expire Monday. If you're in Norway, go to Kiwi or Coop for basic groceries as it seemed to be the cheapest. However, each shop will hv their own discounts (not standardised across the same chain). Eg. We went to a place with 40% discounts on Freia choc which was only available at a particular store.

4. Northern lights chase was the coldest we experienced. Basically, the guide said that if its frost on the floor, it's worse than snow as there's no insulation for your feet. Not the coldest real temperature but coldest we felt. Bring extra clothes and heatpack just in case. The bonfire didn't do anything for me because it's too cold. We went with GuideGunnar which updates its aurora sightings on a daily basis. These guys are crazy and would bring you as far as Sweden just to chase the lights so bring your passports along! They also offer a 50% off the next trip if you don't see it on the day.

5. There's no heat packs there so bring them from home.

6. In Copenhagen, we recommend the Copenhagen card. It's only 65USD for 24hrs and you get free transport, museum pass and boat rides. We only decided to get the card after our boat ride which cost about SGD25-30, which was already a quarter the cost of the card. In Copenhagen, checking of bus tickets was a regular thing.

7. Useful apps for riding public transport: Oslo uses Ruter, Tromsø uses Troms billet, Copenhagen uses Dot tickets. Ticket checking was not very often in Norway. We did not cycle as it felt too cold for more wind to hit our faces.

8. Skip Oslo if you dw to visit a city. We spent 3 nights there and it felt too long. We wanted to do our last minute shopping at Oslo but everything was expensive throughout the whole trip that we started to buy souvenirs earlier when we saw marked down prices. With one more day in Tromsø, we could've gone whale watching.

9. Take into account daylight savings from 29/10. You have 1 more extra hour to sleep but your days are much shorter. We slept a lot because of the cold, about 10hrs of sleep each day and it felt just right.

10. Personally I would have brought instant noodles as the food there isn't flavoured with the same umami as I'm used to. I would also bring a thermal flask there to enjoy my hikes even more, taking a comfortable and warm rest at the peak.

11. If driving, please remember to pay for parking. There's usually a machine to start your parking. Otherwise, the fine is 660NOK. Don't let the rental company settle it as it'll still be billed to you with an extra fee. We would also recommend full insurance since we aren't used to left hand driving and Norway is famous for its narrow roads (at least from Stavanger to Odda where we drove).

12. We used waze for driving and it seemed that speed cameras are only in tunnels but nobody was following the speed limit anyway.

That's about all of the suggestions Ax and I thought of!

Hope these suggestions come in useful for someone.

[thatbritishbastard]

I Guess I’m Not British Anymore. . .

So, I went to the UK and checked on my Mom and family - my wife happened to get a tattoo, so we did that, too. But, I guess I just wasn’t expecting the culture shock.

 Upon going back, I had been gone for 2 years and 10 months. Everything was different. Some things I expected, but some were a legitimate shock.

Never before have I been treated like a tourist in the very place I was born and raised. People looked at me kind of strange, even though I knew exactly what I was looking for and how to get there, and even more so when I opened my mouth to speak. I was asked what I was doing there and where I was from. It was weird, but also self-affirming. 

Everything seemed the same, even after the pandemic. The occasional person wearing a mask, sure, but not something that you couldn’t see in London before COVID had hit, either.

My family had told me that I looked well, and I told them the same. After not seeing someone for 3 years, it’s always nice to see the changes they’ve made, and to talk about the ones you have made for yourself. We’ve always been a close-knit family. It had been a long flight, so I figured I’d sleep it off before our first family function that night.

It turned out to be a great evening. Everyone was wonderful and nobody hesitated to tell me how different I had become. “You’ve got a proper Yank accent now,” they’d tell me. And that was a comfort to me. Before this trip I really wondered about how I was perceived by other people. I didn’t mind so much if I stood out when I was in the UK – I was only going to be there for 4 days – how people see me in the US means a lot more to me, nowadays.

The next day was just spending it with my immediate family. It was great to see them – I’d missed them a hell of a lot. But they had changed, and so had I. We are different people now, and we’re going to need to learn how to deal with that. For now, it’s a little bit of tension, and a little bit of compromise. It isn’t bad, but it is different. I was ready to come home after less than 48 hours in the country. That’s when I realized that I wasn’t coming home, I’d left my home for this vacation – that’s what this was – it was a vacation to visit my family.

Then it came to the tattoo. It wasn’t in the greatest part of the city, so my wife and I agreed that I would take her to the studio and pick her up when she was done. I wandered around the city center, and that, in itself, did feel the same, but the people didn’t. I guess I didn’t feel the same to them, either. People still asked me where I was from when I spoke to them – I guess they picked up on my newfound accent.

Wherever I went, you could hear people talking about The Queen having passed away. On the London Underground, I felt like the only person around who couldn’t care less. I’d long since lost my affinity with UK and the Royal family. Being a tourist in the place you grew up certainly hits differently to what I had been calling “visiting home”.

I went to pick my wife up from the tattoo studio, and we went out to dinner. Her favorite place in the city had been a steakhouse that my parents had taken us to, so we went there. Whilst we were sitting and talking, the table beside us full of 20 or so drunk and loud patrons. They’d gotten to talking about different kinds of people in the city, and when they landed on Americans, they dubbed the country full of “fat, obese dollar-spenders”. I guess that’s the best you can come up with after several pitchers of booze. The waiters were nothing but perfectly pleasant to us, but hearing them ask where we were from was sobering. There hadn’t been a single person that I’d interacted with on this trip that hadn’t asked where I was from. I found it interesting, but there’s a stale feeling in there, too. I love being a resident in the US, and I wouldn’t trade it for a thing.

Once we got home and on US soil, I was mentally preparing myself for dealing with the CBP officer. I’d gone through some horrifying scenarios in my head that even with a Green Card, that there was a chance that I wouldn’t have been allowed to come home. These were ridiculous, of course, and I had been working myself up for nothing. I’d been expecting to fill out a customs form – even US Citizens had to fill those forms out. But those never came. I was sure I’d be in for a ton of questions, submit biometrics, and hope for the best, like all the other times I’d flown into the US. Why would this be any different? When it was my turn, I wished the officer a good morning, and presented my passport. He asked me to look into his webcam for verification purposes, asked for my Green Card, and stamped my passport. That was. . . everything. No third degree, no proving why I was re-entering, or searching my personal effects. I was welcomed home, despite everything. For the first time I felt safe to be here. I know that I’m allowed to be here, and that the government is more than comfortable with my being here.

I left the UK as a British man looking for a new life, a fresh start. I’m not just the holder of a permanent resident card anymore – I’m an American resident. I belong here and this is my home.