#All My Fault Chapter 9

[giuliettagaltieri]

Giggles and Wiggles

Pairing: Husband!Gojō x Pregnant!Reader

Chapter Synopsis: Gojō Satoru vs. a pregnant woman's hormones.

Warning: pregnancy, mood swings, flirting, suggested misogyny, jujutsu society stigma, implied cunnilingus

Word Count: 973

7 of 9

It was difficult for Gojō to understand how much strength your body has to be able to carry all that weight.

He was aware of his physical stature, a hundred and ninety centimeters tall.  He knows he is not exactly small, and with his genes growing inside your cute belly, he worries your pregnancy will be difficult.

And there you were, rounded and full, and you were only seven months pregnant.

The day started quiet and warm.  You in his arms, sighing softly in his chest.

And then your son decided it was a good idea to send a power kick through your belly.

Your eyes pop open, watering immediately at the impact.

Gojō cradles your belly as he hushes you, his lips pressed in your temple.

It took a while to calm you and even after that, you were already grumpy, lips turned upside down as a frown pinched your brows.

Gojō knows better than to bother you further so he started the day on his own. He padded to your shared closet and selected his clothing, eyeing your heavy kimonos with much contempt. He was in the middle of a big yawn when your distressed cry reached his ears.

His clothes were dropped on the tatami mat and he rushed out of the walk-in closet.

And there he stood at the foot of your bed, watching you. Just…watching you.

You had tears streaming down your cheeks, your temples beaded with sweat as you made grabby hands at him.

“I-I can’t get out of bed, Toru.”  You whimpered.

It made his cock strain.  He clears his throat and quickly supports your back as he lifts you off your bed.

Your warm bare thigh brushes against his manhood and you cry harder.  How could your suffering arouse him!  How dare he!

“‘S all your fault!”  You cry on his chest and Gojō bites his cheek to stifle a snicker.  “You did this!”

He simply nods as he strokes your hair, peppering your head with kisses.

“Of course. Mmh, yes.  Yes, it’s all my fault.”  His arms were wrapped around you as he swayed you from side to side.

After a gentle bath with you, with Gojō doing everything for you, your hormones decided to take a break.

And you were smiling up at him again as he brushed your hair, you were lavishing your skin with the moisturizing creams he bought for you and kept asking for kisses.

Gojō was happy to do so.  He liked seeing you happy.

But your sweet spirit slowly dissipates with every layer of clothing you wear.  Formality returning as you become what is expected of a Gojō lady.

Your husband did not like that.  He liked being playful and endearing to you, and he was almost grateful for the change that your pregnancy did to your emotions.

Although, he was still always careful with the boundaries he crossed. 

It is just, there are moments in which he loses himself after catching sight of your bare skin.

A soft moan has Gojō’s eyes traveling to his right, there you sat, your face in a twist as you stretched your back.  His eyes followed your hand as you rubbed your waist.

“You alright?”  He asks before sipping his tea.  His hands glided the fountain pen faster in the paper to finish his work.  He enjoyed your company when he was at home, but being stationary in your seat, despite you almost drowning in cushions already, might be causing a strain on your pregnant body.

He caps the pen and places a paperweight on the documents.

“Wanna take a walk?”  He asks as he stands up to stretch.

“Oh, yes.”  You say softly.  He slips his hand under your forearms and helps you up with a soft grunt, your cheeks warming at the sound.

Gojō places a hand on the small of your back as you walk and immediately feels how stiff your posture is.  He might need to get serious about those stretches you do, maybe he can join you more often to help.

His eyes glance at you as you sigh and attempt to subtly roll your shoulder.

“You should probably take those clothes off.”

Your hands fly to your chest, one on top of the other as you look at him in pure horror.

“N-not in that way.”  Gojō scratches his head, a small smile playing on his lips as he watches your reaction.  “Still acting like a maiden when you’re heavy with my child?”  He rubs his knuckle on your cheek and your hands cover your flushed face.

Gojō guides you forward to continue your walk.

“I meant, you should reduce the layers you wear.  Your belly is heavy as is, you don’t need to carry unnecessary weight.”

You frown at him.  “I don’t mind.  The lady of the house is expected to wear such clothing.”

He clicks his tongue.  “I don’t care what’s expected of you.  I say you should wear comfortable clothing.  And whatever I say, goes.”

You choose not to speak further as his tone turns to a more assertive one, and you are reminded that the man you are walking next to is the head of the clan.  His word is law in this house.

The elders seem to have a difficult time understanding that.

So Gojō Satoru brought it upon himself to wage war with your closet.

One by one, your pretty kimonos started disappearing.  Your tight obis vanish along with them.

After some time, the clan elders simply had to raise their concerns as the wife of the clan head was no longer wearing the appropriate clothing.

Gojō started a bonfire that night.  The pretty silk being fed to the blazing fire that was shot from the fingertips of the man who has his head buried deep between your thighs.

Where the Blue Roses Grow

[deliciousangelfestival]

The Imperfect Couple - 8

Character: politician!Bucky x ex-wife!reader

Summary: A separated couple must pretend to be happily married while the husband runs for Vice President, dealing with old issues and political pressures during his election campaign.

Warning: The couple's arguments could be triggering.

Chapter 1 , Chapter 2 , Chapter 3 , Chapter 4 , Chapter 5 , Chapter 6 , Chapter 7 , Chapter 8 , Chapter 9 , -

Main Masterlist || If you enjoy my work, please consider buying me a coffee on Ko-fi 🙏🏻

Thank you to everyone who has read this chapter. Leave a comment and Reblog, please. I'd love to hear your thoughts. ❤️

The next day, the headlines dominated the news:

"The Barnes Brothers' Hidden Scandal Exposed"

"Shawn Barnes: The Untouchable Elite Dodging Justice"

"Political Candidate’s Family Ties to Corruption Unveiled"

At the campaign headquarters, the atmosphere was thick with tension. The usual hum of activity was replaced by silence, only broken by the sound of phones ringing off the hook.

Steve stood near the table, crumpling a newspaper in his hands, frustration written all over his face. Bucky stood by the window, his posture rigid as he stared out into the distance, lost in thought.

Steve let out a heavy sigh, massaging his temples. "I didn’t expect they’d bring up Shawn at the debate."

Bucky turned slightly, his voice calm but carrying an edge. "You know Brock. He always hits below the belt, always makes it personal."

Steve glanced out at the campaign team, who were scrambling. The room beyond was a flurry of chaos: phones ringing non-stop, staff members anxiously typing responses, pacing as they fielded questions from the press, all trying to extinguish the flames of the scandal. Steve ran a hand through his hair as he watched, feeling the weight of the situation.

"The numbers are tanking," Steve muttered, his face grim. "After this, the public’s furious. Voters won’t back a candidate whose family used connections to dodge the law."

Bucky’s jaw tightened as Steve continued, "People hate it when those with power think they’re above punishment. That’s the real damage here. It’s not just about Shawn—it’s about what it represents."

The trend #CatchShawnBarnes was everywhere, climbing to the top spot on social media. The timing couldn’t have been worse. The firestorm had erupted, fueled by rumors and bots likely hired by Brock and Edgar’s teams, intensifying the outrage.

Bucky broke the silence with a quiet, "I’m sorry."

Steve looked at him, shaking his head. "Don’t be. This isn’t on you, Buck." His tone softened. "Besides, it’s not your fault."

Steve had known the Barnes family long enough to understand the full story. Shawn, the eldest son, always had an ego, fed by the wealth and privilege of his upbringing. With everything handed to him, he acted like the world owed him, seeing himself as untouchable.

In truth, it was Shawn who was supposed to enter politics. But unlike Bucky, he lacked the charisma and leadership qualities. Caroline, their mother, had long since given up hope on her eldest son, who had failed to live up to expectations.

Back then, Bucky had been a quiet presence, almost invisible in his own home. Caroline had never even heard his voice much, even though they lived under the same roof. But everything changed when Bucky entered law school. There, he shone.

He joined clubs, became student president, volunteered, organized demonstrations, and eventually graduated as valedictorian. Every trait of a leader was there, clear for everyone to see—especially Caroline. She shifted her attention to Bucky, molding him into the perfect candidate, ensuring he stayed on the path to success.

Shawn, once the golden child, watched as the spotlight shifted to his younger brother. The attention, the purpose he had once enjoyed, slipped away. He felt lost, purposeless. That’s when the spiral began. The drugs were his escape, his way of coping with the emptiness.

At first, it was subtle. But soon, it became public knowledge—Shawn Barnes was a cocaine addict. In an attempt to save face, Caroline and Julius sent him to rehab. But the real disaster struck when Shawn escaped, driving under the influence. That’s when the accident happened—the night he hit someone with his car.

Steve didn’t know the full details after that. What he did know was that Shawn had paid bail and was sent to another rehab, the entire incident hushed up. The Barnes family had buried the scandal deep, hoping it would never see the light of day.

But as Steve thought to himself, no matter how deep you bury something, eventually the stench of rot seeps through.

"I’ll fix this," Bucky said, his voice low but determined.

Steve raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms. "How, exactly?"

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

The Barnes household felt colder than ever, the tension suffocating the room. Shawn sat in the corner, hunched over, hugging his knees. His fingernails were chewed down to the skin, his pale face etched with panic.

"Shit... shit..." he muttered under his breath, eyes darting around the room like a caged animal.

Across the room, Caroline and Julius were in a quiet panic. Caroline paced, wringing her hands, her face pale with fear. Julius stood by the window, his jaw clenched, staring out as if searching for answers that weren’t there.

You sat on the sofa, watching the unfolding chaos like a distant spectator. It was almost theatrical—the Barnes family, once so composed, unraveling before your eyes.

Just then, the door creaked open, and you turned to see Bucky walking in. His face was a mask of determination, his eyes dark and unreadable.

You rose from the sofa and approached him. Before you could speak, he cut you off with a low, firm voice. “I want you to stay out of sight. Away from the windows.”

You frowned but nodded, sensing the weight of his words. He brushed past you without another glance and made his way toward Shawn.

Shawn looked up at Bucky, his eyes wide and filled with fear. He seemed so small in front of his younger brother, almost shrinking under the weight of Bucky’s presence.

“Get up,” Bucky ordered, his voice hard. Without waiting for a response, he reached down and pulled Shawn to his feet.

Shawn stumbled but didn’t resist. He followed Bucky like a lost child.

“Where are you taking him?” Caroline’s voice trembled as she rushed forward to stop them, but Bucky didn’t break stride.

“What he should’ve done years ago,” Bucky answered coldly, dragging Shawn along.

Caroline hurried after them, her heels clicking against the floor. “Bucky, wait! What do you mean?”

Bucky led them outside, the sound of the door swinging open making Caroline stop in her tracks. She froze as her eyes widened in shock. There, right outside their home, were TV station cameras, police cars, and flashing lights.

Caroline’s heart pounded in her chest. “Bucky,” she hissed, her voice sharp with disbelief. “How could you do this? This is a public execution! You’re putting a guillotine to your own brother!”

Julius stepped forward, his voice tired but stern. “Son, is this really the only way?”

Bucky turned briefly to look at his parents, his expression cold. “We have to set an example.”

Caroline’s face twisted in fear, her voice dropping to a near whisper. “Bucky, please... don’t do this.”

Before Bucky could respond, Shawn’s voice rang out, shaky but clear. “Stop!” he shouted.

Caroline flinched, her eyes locking with Shawn’s. His face was pale, but his eyes, for the first time in years, looked determined.

“Mother,” Shawn said quietly, his voice thick with emotion. “I’ve been free from jail, but there’s been a shackle on me ever since. Guilt has haunted me every day. I’ve been hiding, running, pretending it didn’t happen. But it did. And I need to face it.”

Bucky gave his brother a nod, and Shawn took a shaky breath before turning to him. “Let’s go.”

They walked toward the press together. Cameras flashed as Bucky led Shawn to the bouquet of microphones, the press shouting questions over one another. Shawn took a deep breath and stepped forward. His hands trembled as he gripped the podium.

“I made a mistake,” Shawn began, his voice cracking. “I was reckless... I hurt someone. I ran from it, and I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry—for what I did and for hiding it for so long.”

As the words left his mouth, you could see the weight of guilt lifting from his shoulders, though his face remained heavy with regret. He glanced at Bucky, who stood beside him, stoic but supportive. Bucky knew how much the accident haunted Shawn, how it had eaten him alive from the inside out.

After Shawn finished his confession, he stepped away from the podium and voluntarily walked toward the waiting police car. The press erupted with questions aimed at Bucky. One reporter shouted above the rest, “Why did you expose your own brother like this?”

Bucky met the reporter’s gaze, his voice steady and firm. “Because no one is above the law.”

As Shawn was driven away, Caroline stood frozen in the doorway, her face a mask of fury. She didn’t want to look at Bucky, not now, not after what he’d done. Julius said nothing, too exhausted to protest or intervene.

Once the commotion had died down, you walked up to Bucky, your voice low. “You don’t feel guilty? Sacrificing your own brother like that?”

Bucky leaned in, his breath warm against your ear as he whispered, "I'll do anything to get that position. It’s all for you too, babe." His voice was low, dangerous, the tension between you crackling like a live wire.

You could feel the heat radiating off him, the intensity in his gaze as his lips hovered just inches from your skin. The closeness sent a shiver down your spine, your heart pounding in your chest. There was something intoxicating in the way he said it, like a promise that left you both thrilled and unnerved.

You met his gaze, your pulse racing. "You’re crazy," you muttered, though the words felt weaker than you intended.

Without another word, you pulled away, leaving him standing there, the charge of the moment lingering long after you had gone.

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

The next day you returned to the campaign headquarters, where the atmosphere was thick with tension.

So much had happened in the past 48 hours. The campaign team buzzed with a frenetic energy, fueled by the fallout from Shawn’s confession. Despite the chaos, there was a flicker of optimism; his admission had managed to regain some trust from the voters.

Yet, you could sense the undercurrent of anxiety. Everyone was on edge, aware that the storm wasn't over. Phone calls rang out, strategy meetings were called, and you could see the weight of the situation pressing down on each team member's shoulders. You felt a mix of relief and dread—relief that there was hope, but dread about what might come next.

Your brother, Tim was still focused and serious as he poured over the reports, his usual calm replaced by a quiet intensity. You watched him for a moment, feeling a strange pang of guilt in your chest. But you couldn’t linger on that.

“I’m going to get some coffee,” you muttered, more to yourself than anyone else.

The streets were busy, but your mind was elsewhere, lost in the chaos of everything that had happened. The scandal, the press, Bucky. It felt like everything was unraveling. The nearest café was only a block away, and you pushed through the door, grateful for the brief respite.

That’s when you saw him.

Ian.

He was leaning casually against the counter, a cup of coffee in hand, but the moment he spotted you, something changed in his expression. A smirk tugged at the corner of his lips, but it was far from friendly.

You froze in place, staring at him for a beat too long. “Are you spying on us?” you asked, your voice low but sharp as you crossed your arms, trying to keep your emotions in check.

Ian's smirk widened as if he’d been waiting for this. “Isn’t it obvious?” he replied, his tone almost teasing but dripping with bitterness. “I work with the other side now.”

You felt a surge of frustration, but more than that, something inside you twisted—an old wound reopening. You took a step closer, your eyes narrowing.

“We’ve worked together, Ian. We’ve seen injustice and unfairness in the world. But this…” You hesitated, searching his face for any trace of the person you used to know. “This feels personal.”

Ian’s smile faded, replaced by something darker. He snapped his fingers, and in an instant, everyone in the café left, leaving just the two of you inside.

You were taken aback, a chill running down your spine as the door swung shut behind the last customer.

He stepped forward, closing the distance between you, his voice dropping to a dangerous whisper. “You got that right,” he said, his eyes burning with something deep and unresolved.

“The person who died in that car accident? The one your dear Bucky’s brother killed? That was my twin brother.”

Your breath caught in your throat, the world around you narrowing to just Ian and the heavy weight of his words. “Your twin…” you whispered, the realization hitting you like a punch to the gut.

Ian’s expression hardened, his hands clenching into fists at his sides. “Yeah. My twin brother. Both of us were put up for adoption. I didn’t even know he existed until I was fourteen years old.”

He turned his gaze away from you, the memories clearly painful, but he didn’t stop. “I was adopted by a British couple. Grew up thinking I was an only child. It wasn’t until I did some digging into my adoption records that I found out about him. My twin.”

You felt a chill run down your spine as you listened, unable to speak. Ian’s voice was tight with emotion, but he pressed on.

“I was so damn happy when I found him. We bonded right away, as if we’d never been apart.” His voice softened, but the pain was unmistakable.

“We stayed in touch. Became close. We had so much to catch up on, and it was like I finally had someone who understood me in a way no one else could.”

He shook his head, his jaw clenching. “But then…” He looked back at you, his eyes blazing with anger. “Then Shawn Barnes took him away from me. He killed him. And your husband family covered it all up.”

You flinched at the venom in his words, your heart pounding in your chest. You had no idea. You hadn’t known the full story, and now it was staring you in the face.

Ian stepped even closer, invading your space, his eyes searching yours for something—maybe regret, maybe guilt. “They buried it. Buried him. And now you’re standing by their side, supporting the man whose family let my brother’s killer walk free.”

You opened your mouth to respond, but nothing came out. You felt frozen, torn between your loyalty to Bucky and the weight of Ian’s grief and anger.

You knew about the cover-up involving Shawn, but who were you to uncover the truth, especially knowing it would be futile to fight against Caroline?

Now, guilt washed over you for having ignored this. It turned out the victim was closer than you had ever realized.

Ian’s voice softened, but the intensity didn’t fade. “Tell me,” he said, his gaze piercing into you. “After all of this… after everything you know… do you still trust him?”

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Lift Me Off My Feet

Chapter 12: Finale

Masterlist

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12

“You are not listening!” You shout, frustrated with the man.

In the couple of weeks that you have known and lived with them, you never expected that you would end up arguing with them. Even less with Price.

“No, Birdie. You are the one that needs to listen!” The man argued back.

“You got me fired, John! What else do you want me to hear?” You ask, running your hands through your hair. 

It finally set in, the reality that the idyllic life of living with the four of them without a worry was just an illusion. You were here because you were hiding, and they were here because they were hiding you. 

“I didn't get you fired, Birdie. Your boss did.” Price says, crossing his arms.

“Don't get sassy with me! He told you that they needed to know if I could get back to work any soon or they would be forced to fire me and you told them to do so!” You shout again, feeling like Price is lying to your face. “Why would you do that?!”

“Because you hate that job!” He shouts back. “And you don't need to work!”

“Yes, I do, Price! Yes, I do!” You say, a dry laugh leaving your throat. “Like everyone! I can't just live sponging off of you guys!”

“That's not what's happening and you know it, birdie!” He exclaims. “Don't manipulate the situation into making it look like a bloody transaction!”

“I'm manipulating the situation?!” You ask, pointing to yourself. 

“Yes! You are making it look like we are paying you to stay with us, birdie!” He explains, moving his hands to his hips.

“Oh, for god's sake, Price!” You exclaim, rubbing your face. “Why don't you exaggerate it a bit more?! I don't even know why I'm arguing with you about my job!”

“Neither do I?! Because I think it is pretty much settled!” He says, walking away towards the kitchen. 

“IT IS NOT SETTLE!” You scream, shocked by his response. “The reason why I don't know why we are arguing is because I don't know who gave you the right to choose over me!”

That makes him turn around, looking at you like you grow a second head. “Well, excuse me. For believing I have a say in your life, I just assumed I could since we bloody love each other and all that!”

“Don't pull that shit on me, Price! This has nothing to do with love!” You say, crossing your arms. “I don't have a say on your work! So why should you have it on me!”

“It's not the bloody same!” He says, rubbing his face.

“It's not for you because it doesn't benefit you!” You scream, looking back when you hear the door open as Gaz, Soap and Ghost enter the house. The three of them having left the house not too long ago to buy breakfast. 

“What's going on? We could hear the shouts from outside.” Gaz asks, entering first and looking between Price and you, seeing the wide cliff between the two of you.

“Nothing!” Price barks, crossing his arms again. 

You ignore the looks on everyone's face, instead walking to the door. 

“Where are you going now?!” Price asks, moving to be able to see you.

“Out! So I can fucking breathe without feeling I'm choking!” You say, opening the door after the boys closed it. 

“Don't go far!” Price says, still caring under all his bad mood 

“I KNOW I CAN'T GO FAR!” You say, slamming the door on your way out.

You hate screaming, hate shouting, hate raising your voice and even more if it is at Price or any of the men inside. It's not their fault and screaming at each other is not the way to fix it. But you can't help it, tired of being pushed around at everyone's mercy without asking what's your choice. 

Sitting down on the step right outside the house, not wanting or needing to go any further, you hide your face behind your hands, letting your palms get wet with your tears. 

“Hey, you alright?” A man's voice says, making you look up, to come face to face with an unfamiliar face. 

You don't have time to answer, because something hits the back of your head and everything blends to black.

Price updates the boys once you are out, he tells them your ex-boss called, told him you needed to get back to work the next day or he would fire you, he tells them how he told him to go ahead since you couldn't go back to work jet, he tells them about how he wasn't able to tell you about the empty position at base that you could filled to work with them because you started screaming, he tells them about how he lost his cool and just screamed back instead of explaining.

He tells them everything, feeling like the worst person in the world for making you leave the house with tears on your face. It's Gaz the first one to stand up. “I'll check on her.” He mumbles, as he walks outside to an empty staircase. He walks down, checking both sides of the street only to find it just as empty. 

An anxious feeling starts to brew on his stomach, entering back to the house with a worried expression on his face. “She's gone.” He says almost casually, as if not voicing one of the biggest fears the men around him have had for the last month.

“What do you mean she's gone?” Soap asks. “She must be around the block, she'll be back in a bit, mate.”

No one believes him, not even himself. You wouldn't have walked out of his sight like that, not without dragging them with you, not without a phone, not without telling them. 

There is a beat of silence, each debating whether it is plausible that you simply left, all of them feeling that the most possible chance is that something happened to you. 

“I'll check the car camera, it is parked right in front of the door.” Ghost says, taking his phone out to check it. 

They all check the screen, seeing the door open and close. They see you sit down, body shaking as you cry, Price feeling his heart shrunk at the sight knowing it was his doing. 

They then see the two men walking in front of you, how one of them takes advantage that you have your face covered to stand behind you, how the other calls your attention to look at your face, and how once he knows it's you he nods to the other man, who knocks you out hitting you with a bat at the back of your head.

The wave of all the different emotions hitting them at once keeps them in place for a second, paralyzed on their chair. Soap jumps first, talking about checking the cameras on the street, checking the cars, their licence place, anything. 

But it doesn't reach Price's ears, the only thing he can hear is the voices in his head telling him that he has failed twice now. The first one he wasn't able to keep you close enough when you left in the middle of the night, and now he was the one that pushed you away. 

You were just on the other side of the door a moment ago and now… now he didn't know where you were. All because he didn't explain himself and let his emotions take control of him.

“Price!” It's Ghost's voice that wakes him up, standing beside the sergeants. “Move.”

That's all he says, and that's all Price needs. 

They'll get you back, whatever it takes. 

Two weeks.

That is what it takes them to finally find a trail.

That is what it takes Price to breathe again.

That's what it takes Simon to let be seen outside the office.

That's what it takes Soap to let himself be embraced by any of the others.

That's what it takes Gaz to stop baring his teeth to everyone. 

They have a trail. 

And god knows that's all they need. 

What you need, is a doctor. A shower. A glass of water. A nap. Anything that is not forced or thrown at you. 

Two weeks of torture. 

Two weeks of just getting hurt, insulted, humiliated, all of it just for the purpose of causing you pain. 

The henchmen of the man you used to say good morning to were the ones that have stolen you away. 

The ones that have thrown you into an empty dark room.

The ones that have “interrogated” you about who you worked for. 

The ones that have “interrogated” you about how much they paid you. 

You didn't say a word, which usually resulted in a punch to the face or a kick to the ribs. 

You want to believe that they will find you. 

That they will take you back home.

That Price will forgive you for shouting at him.

Hell, if you die and the last thing you did was shout at him.

You'll live.

They'll find you.

Two weeks.

Of fighting with yourself.

The side that says you'll live.

And the side that tells you to give up already.

The second one usually wins.

Like today, when the man that enters the room every day walks up to you, limping and with a knife in his hand. 

He yanks your hair, pulling you up on your feet and pressing the knife on your throat. “Make a sound and it'll be the last thing you do.”

He moves you into a chokehold, pushing you in front of him as he walks down the hall. There is shouting and the sound of guns inside the building. 

The moment he sees the car where they push you in, the one they saw on the cameras; Price almost needs to pull Simon back from running inside the building.

This is it.

This is the headquarters they couldn't find for so long. 

The headquarters where all the important information and the guns they have looked for so long are at.

The headquarters where everything that matters is.

The headquarters where they kept you at. 

Price sends Ghost to the building on the other side of the road, not trusting the man in face to face with what they can find inside. 

And he obliges, hating the rank differences.

They move in, clearing room after room.

No sign of you.

The move to the second floor.

You are not there.

More and more people that hit the ground when they found them.

You are still missing. 

Until you see it. 

The unmistakable blue cap on Gaz's head.

And you shout.

You shout louder than you shout at Price.

You shout louder than when Soap scared you hiding behind the door. 

You shout louder than when you called for Ghost when you thought he fell on the shower but it was just the shampoo bottle.

You have never shouted at Gaz.

Until now.

And the moment you do you feel the blade dig into your skin, moving your hand between the knife and your neck.

The three of them turn to you, immediately updating Ghost and telling him to move. 

The window behind you is almost like a target for a perfect shot. 

But Ghost can't shoot.

Not when he can see your head.

Not when there is a possibility that he may hit you. 

But he can when you move.

When you grab the blade, breaking the skin of your fingers, and you pull back just enough to squish yourself down. 

You are still against his chest, the man still holding you. But Ghost can now see your head, lower than before. And the arms around you quickly go limp, falling forward taking you with him. 

A ringing in your ear keeps you from Price's voice calling your name. Everything is dizzy for a moment, there is a warm sensation on your elbow and when you look back a red pool of blood is bleeding onto your clothes.

You liked that t-shirt. 

You'll need to try with peroxide, see if you can take the stain out. 

Your brain ignores the corpse lying next to you, but for some reason you can't stop looking at the blood on your elbow.

It isn't until Price cups your face, your grimey, bloody and sunken face. And you look up to him, his blue eyes. 

And you let yourself cry.

After two weeks.

You cry.

So hard you can't see nor hear anything. 

You cling onto Price, hiding your face on his neck, digging your nails on his back needing to feel him under your skin. 

Apologies fly from one to the other.

For shouting, for pushing away, for failing to protect, for not shouting, for being taken away.

You feel two more pairs of arms around you, feeling the fourth person only when you start to leave the building. 

Not much longer an ambulance arrives, finally taking you to safety.

The four men in the car right behind. 

Recovery is just as slow.

No permanent physical damage.

But not all the wounds are on the skin.

Those heal quite fast. 

And soon you are back on your feet. 

On your scared, wobbly feet.

The boys are back around, always one of them close.

“I'm never leaving you out of my sight again.” Price says, cupping your face as he kisses your forehead. “I don't care if I sound like a madman.”

They make it easy to get back.

Price finally tells you about the job at base, which you gladly apply for.

Surprisingly you got it, and started working soon.

It was easy.

You got a better flat, easy to pay when four more people chime in for the bills. 

You got a better job, with better pay and a better boss.

You got, not only one, but four lovers. 

And you have all the time of your life to heal everything that's left. 

You still wonder how you managed to get into your garage that night. 

But now you're glad you did.

And with this, ladies and gentlemen.

Lift Me Off My Feet comes to an end ❤️.

Thanks for joining along, for all the support that you have given me the last couple of months, for the patience between chapters, special thanks to @darkangel4121 for listening to me complain so much and to everyone who has joined and will join the blog.

I love you, my lovelies 💗

TagList: @whos-fran @thevoidwriting @sklt987659 @kayden666 @dumb12bvtch1212 @thatonepupkai @darkangel4121 @cassiecasluciluce @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @tired-writer04 @evolutionarry @prettykinkysoul @pagesfalling @skyler-loves-rick-grimes @readerofallthingss @onewattson6529 @mynameismothra   @renabear88 @lolliepopsicle @reap3erslov3 @tooloudarts @sodavrr @anirok2 @lilliumrorum @ladyxtiger @multy-fandom-lover @thriving-n-jiving @lotionlamp @spicyspicyliving @xxeiraxx @vampirekilmerfic @keiraslayz @risingofjupiter @witchthewriter @soupinasock @phantomly27 @arbesa-mind   @multifandomheathenannie  @spadekip @cmbghost @herefor-tojis-tits @tooloudarts @panikk-attackkk @reap3erslov3 @mothsdrabbles @ghosts-hoe

[oval3000]

Chapter 3

Yandere Psych Patient König x Nurse Reader

Warning: Possesive, Obsession, Death, Gore, Blood, Smut, Toxic behavior, age gap.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

(This might suck idk. I don't know German so it's all Google translate)

-------------------------------------------------------

He hasn't left his room for a month. They kept him in their with the straitjacket on. His meals are just vitamins that he has to swallow. You would go in to check up on him, but new orders from the administrator's to not go near at all, so you pass by his room. You would peak through the little window and see him laying on his back with little no to motion on his arms or body entirely. His psychiatrist, Dr. Smith is the only that goes in there. They have sessions in his room instead of the usual spot they have it in.

She was pissed at everyone, specifically you. You are her punching bag, even though it was Ben's fault. "Why hasn't he been given his meds!" She yelled at you.

"We are not allowed to go i-" you tried to explain your her, but she could care less.

"You are his nurse right! Your job is to give him his meds! How did you graduate when you can't even do that!" She yelled at you.

You plead for her to listen to you "I'm sorry, Dr. Smith. I can't it's Mr. Millers orders. No one can go in except you because you are his psychiatrist."

So she strolled her way to the administrator's office.

Ignoring his assistant from telling her that she can't go in. Slaming the door open to see him sitting on his chair, writing whatever cral he writes on paper.

"Sarah calm down!"

"Do you have any idea how dangerous he is, and you want me to deal with him alone! On top of that the lack of guards is making my job harder!" Dr. Smith argued with a hand on her hips and her finger pointing towards Ben.

"Do you remeber when you wanted a nurse to look after him." She rolled her eyes. Yes, you, the nurse. "Do you have any idea how much money is going towards her. Triple the pay for looking after him."

Her hands swing in motion, showing her frustration. "She can't even do her fucking job Ben!"

"If she's alive, then she's doing her job well. What's making this hard, is you barging into my office and telling me what to do when you are the one demanding this." He stood up from his chair, fixing his navy tie. "We're loosing staff. People don't want to go near him. Gabriel is threatening to sue the company. Gaurds are quiting left and right so sorry that there aren't enough staff attending your needs."

She crossed her arms with an annoying sigh leaving her lips tinted with red lipstick. "Then hire more people, I don't see the problem?"

"Did you not hear what I said" he walked towards her, standing toe to toe to her. "Majority of our budget is going towards (Y/n). She's been here for two months now, lasting longer than any other nurses. We can't afford another hire with the same pay to deal with König. Besides he hasn't actually killed anyone in those two months, I'll take that than dealing with someone who has a broken jaw from a simple punch."

"Then ask for more money." She scuffed like if it was a joke she said.

He laughed at her face, "Do you think the government cares to fund more for this place, I already have the staff on my ass for new medical supplies, do you think they are gonna hand me the budget to hire someone with triple pay just because you are scared."

"Then fire (y/n) and hire a new guard, maybe someone with military experience."

"Why would I do that. You came into my office, spreaded your legs cause you were so desperate for a nurse and now you want me to fire her. She hasn't done anything in particularly wrong."

"She doesn't follow orders!"

"She does, you just make it difficult." He came in defense.

"Wasn't she trying to stop you from putting him into a straitjacket?" She smirked while her arms crossed at her chest.

"Yes, and she was right. Putting him in a straitjacket does nothing. He was fine it's just that..." he closed his eyes taking deep breath.

"Just what?" She came closer to him, placing her hand on his shoulder, gently caressing it.

He turned his head to her, he used to lovy dovey with her seduction, but now it's more annoyance. "Eli, the other guard, came to my office the other day and told me that Gabriel was provoking König."

She rolled her eyes, looking around his office. Paying attention to the paintings hanged up on the wall and the light objects he has on his desk. "Like what? Making fun of him? We all make fun the people here what else is new?"

"I don't know the full details, but that's what he told me." He sat a bit on his desk.

"Why does that matter?" She shook her head without a single thought in her brain.

"Gabriel is threatening to sue us. If we fight the legal action, we'll have to defend König. König, just like any other patient represent us, our care. If they find out that Gabriel was the one that caused this, making König the victim it doesn't look good after we placed him in the straitjacket. Like we silencing him out. It will ruin our reputation, we'll all loose our jobs and you fucked your way up here for nothing."

"But he harmed a worker, beside murdered multiple people." She let out a little chuckle, placing her hand on his chest.

He didn't give in, instead, he gave her a stare. "He's ex- military and as for you being his psychiatrist, you'll have to speak on behalf of him. Meaning that people will find out about you, how you never studied to become a doctor you fucked every professor you had to get your degree."

"What are you saying, Ben." Her smile dropped.

"I won't fire (Y/n). She stood up for König, making us look like we care about our patients. As for Gabriel, all he's asking is for some 20,000 thousand dollars, which we can easily give him worth than standing infront of the judge. Which means that we can't afford new guards for you. Besides they're taking off his straitjacket today, so stop being so scared and do your dam job."

"I still think you should fire, (Y/n) atleast." She hummed, wrapping her arms around his waist.

"I'm not doing that. Beside she's the only staff that doesn't barge in here demanding stuff. She nice and sweet...." he looked down to the side, " and...young and beautiful. "

She let go of his waist, clenching her jaw. Yes, you being so beautiful. "So what? You want to fuck her? Is that it. Never head young pussy before?"

"You should leave, I have work to do and so do you. This discussion is over." He walked to his desk, sitting down on his chair, unbutton his last few buttons from his dark, navy, blazer.

She stormed off his office, angrly stomping on the white tile floors with her heels creating a louder noise.

You heard the word going around that their taking of his straitjacket, so you quickly gathered what you need to check him up. You saw as the guards took off. He let out a big stretched, flexing more of his muscles. It caused a scare to the guards like a lion letting out a roar.

You walked up to and saw more of his face. He stared at you.

He missed you. He never thought he would miss you. During that month of not seeing you was a time he contemplated about you. Are you made for him or not. He will shut his eyes and images of you will pop up. You smiling at him. Taking good care of him. Watching you squirm under him as you take his full length cock inside your pussy. He'll treat you with respect as long as you do what he says that's all. Seeing your belly swell up with his baby. Can't wait to fuck your tits filled with milk. Can't wait to impregnate you with multiple of his children, making one big happy family. How protective he'll be for his kids, for you. To stand up to the bullies, to show them not to be scared of anything. To hold them if they cry.

He should kill you for making him react this way. He should just kill you. You are just another nurse thinking they have control over him. He use to give orders to people, being the colonel and all, he got the respect he fought for, why does he feel weak around you. You are so sweet and joyful to him. If he was back in the field and saw you, would he kill you. Or maybe fuck you. Maybe that's it. He hasn't done it in so long, so long he hasn't touch a women. He should've just fucked one of the other nurses. Yes, maybe he should do that. Fuck a nurse, just to see. I mean what's the harm in that.

"Aah...yes. right there ngh.... yes...oh fuck that feels good."

The sound of König's footsteps were low that they couldn't hear over the sound of skin slapping against eachother. Watching a men fucking his girlfriend on his bed.

"Does your boyfriend fuck you like this?" Slaming her ass back and forth on his cock.

"Ah....a-aah....he-..he could barley...make me- fuck!..mmgh....wet." She grip the bedsheets hard while he kept pounding her.

No. No. He can't. Not you. He can't. He can't betray you like they did. He can't imagine the face you'll make if you know he fucked another girl. No he should be pure to you. You should be the only one he touches.

He needs you. Okay, it's done. He'll make you his and you'll love him. You'll love him and care for him. Rather you like him or not it's done.

You wrapped the cuff around his bicep and squeeze the bulb reading the numbers on the circle, writing it down. Doing the usual things you have studied for. As you were checking his heartbeat, he reached up which caused you to flinch a bit. His index finger, gently, caressing your cheek. Your back was turned to the guards, making it hard them to see what's going. You stared at him as he touched you with such charisma. His thumb reaching to your chin, hovering over your lips. He placed the tip of his thumb on your bottom lip, gently pulling it out a bit.

You shouldn't have this feeling at the pit of your stomach. You couldn't tell of you didn't smack his hand away because you are scared or because you enjoy it. You never had this much attention, not like this.

"I don't have time to argue with you (Y/n)! Go to your room!" The little girl tuged at her moms shirt.

"Where's daddy?" She felt tears running down her face as her mother poured more wine into her glass, already finishing up the fresh new bottle.

"(Y/n)! Seriously go to room! You are such a headache! Why couldn't your father take you with him! Nauseating!" She dranked the entire glass, slamming the cup on the table.

"Where's daddy?" She said one last time not letting go of her blanket. The same blanket her father got her when she told him she was cold.

"HE LEFT! HE LEFT US (Y/N)! LEFT US FOR THAT BITCH! AND NOW I'M STUCK HERE WITH YOU. HE RUINED MY LIFE. I COULD'VE DONE SOOOO MANY THINGS! But no! I'm stuck to take care of a brat!"

He palmed your cheek, feeling your warmth. He went in closer to you. You could feel his hot breath, quicken as he got closer to your lips.

You pulled back, "I shouldn't- we shouldn't. I mean." You whispered to him.

"Mein liebling (my darling)." He whispered to you. The first time he spoke to you. You couldn't understand him, but he spoke to you. "Du bist mein (you are mine)." He pulled you closer to him, he didn't care if the guards were staring, if anything, he enjoys it. To show everyone that he is yours to touch. "Mein schatz (my sweetheart)," his lips were hovering yours, you felt a little tingle at how close he was.

You know this shouldn't happen. You turned your away from his. You walked back, feeling his grasp letting go. He stared at you witch a smile on his face. You saw the smile he gave you.

When your shift ended and went back to your apartment, the thoughts of what happened lingered into your mind.

That night, you couldn't sleep. He was in your dreams. What if you never pulled way. Were you really going to kiss him. You glazed over the parts where he touched you.

You searched the words he said to you to translate it. Sweetheart, darling, mine.

You felt the butterflies in your stomach again. You never felt so complicated before.

Having a crush on a patient.

You have a crush on König.

[joelalorian]

Fall Into Me - Chapter Three: No Mirror for Monsters

dbf!Joel x f!reader

Summary: Joel is hanging on by a thread as a single father to a tenacious 10-year-old Sarah. Feeling like he's drowning, like the world is about to spit him out, he needs some help before he breaks in half. At your dad's insistence, you show up in his life and change everything.

Story is inspired by the song Fall Into Me by Forest Blakk. Chapter titles will be lyrics from the song.

Word Count: 4.3k

Chapter Warnings: Mature, under 18 take a hike. No outbreak AU. Lots of feelings, confusion, and self doubt. Joel goes on a date but not with you. Two idiots falling and pining for each other. Lotta swearing, because, yeah, I like it. Reader has long enough hair for a ponytail and likes comfy clothes. Age gap of about 9 years (Reader 24/25, Joel 33/34). No use of y/n. Reader has a nickname used by her dad.

Dividers by the wonderful @saradika-graphics

Thank you for reading this little tale! I did not expect all the love - my heart is fit to burst over all the wonderful comments and reblogs!

Chapter Two | Main Masterlist

“Good morning, Millers!” you greeted as you let yourself into their house the following morning. Nearing late October, it was a beautiful day outside and the crisp morning air made you happy. It would heat up later, but for now you were enjoying the comfort of a beloved hoodie and yoga pants.

“Hi darlin’,” Joel replied with a lot less enthusiasm as he leaned against the kitchen doorframe. Still nursing his first cup of coffee, his sparkling personality hadn’t kicked in yet. “Sarah’s just gettin’ dressed. Want some coffee?”

“Nah, don’t drink the stuff. Smells good, but the taste is just…” You scrunched up your nose, at a loss for the right word to describe how utterly disgusting you found the taste of coffee. You moved through the house to join him in the kitchen.

Turning back to the counter with a chuckle, Joel poured himself another cup and shrugged. “There’s no accounting for taste, I guess. More for me, then.”

“There’s the silver lining!” you teased. “So, you guys have any big plans this weekend?”

“Nah, should be qui—Oh shit, I almost forgot!” Joel closed his eyes, bumping a fist against his forehead. His gaze was shuttered when it met yours again. “Would you mind watching Sarah on Saturday evening?”

“Yeah, sure. I don’t have any plans, so I’m happy to hang with the nugget. You got a hot date or something?” You meant it as a joke, but the way Joel winced clued you in. Your face fell at his next words, and you hoped he didn’t notice.

“Uh, yeah. Tommy set it up.” Joel drained the rest of his cup, tossing it into the sink, and ran an anxious hand through his curls. “First one in a while, ya know.”

No, you didn’t know. But it wasn’t really your business, was it? Sarah’s arrival in the kitchen saved you from having to say anything else as the little girl launched herself at you.

“Hey nugget,” you said, wrapping your arms around her little body as she clung to your waist. Despite your best efforts, your greeting lacked your prior enthusiasm. You could feel the heavy weight of Joel’s gaze on you like a laser, but you refused to look in his direction. “You ready to go?”

“Uh huh, I already ate breakfast,” Sarah said proudly, spinning to hug her father. “Bye Dad, love you.”

You turned away, already heading for the door as Joel pulled her in for a bear hug, feeling your heart constrict at how much they loved each other. You didn’t bother to say goodbye.

Joel had a date.

A date who wasn’t you.

Man, that fucking sucked.

Could you blame the guy, though? He was still young and handsome, hardworking and responsible to a fault. And, most of all, he didn’t know that you harbored growing feelings for him. Nor could he ever find out, you reminded yourself, not when your dad was his best friend.

The ride to drop Sarah off was full of silence, your mind weighed down with thoughts of Joel and the valiant effort of trying to convince yourself to stop thinking about him. Coming out of the fog as you moved up in the school drop-off line, you wished Sarah a good day and watched as she bounced up the steps into the building. You envied that sweet obliviousness of youth.

Driving away from the school, anxiety started to kick in. The thought of going back to your house to sit alone as the four walls closed in on you made your stomach churn. You drove around for an hour, no real destination in mind, and ended up at Peace District Park. With nothing much else to do, you walked the trails of the urban oasis and let nature work its magic in calming your nerves.

It worked.

As you sat on a bench watching songbirds flutter around the flora, you texted one of your best friends from high school who still lived in the area. You needed a girl’s night out.

Distractions were dangerous in his line of work, but Joel struggled to get his mind to focus all morning. He fixated on the way your face fell and your entire demeanor changed when he mentioned the date, like you were disappointed, hurt even. But that couldn’t be, could it?

There was no way you felt something for him. Was there?

Joel went over and over every interaction between you two since the day you met, trying to see if he was reading into things too much. He wasn’t the most observant guy, he knew that well enough, but there were moments when he’d catch you gazing at him with this look of wonder in your eyes… that had to mean something. Right?

Fuck. He was really bad at this stuff. So out of practice and lacking confidence.

Maybe he just imagined it all. Maybe you had something else on your mind and didn’t give a shit about someone like him going on a date.

What could he do about it if you liked him anyway? Nothing. Absolutely nothing. So, what did it matter. You were JB’s daughter and Sarah’s babysitter, nothing more and nothing less.

Joel’s mind continued to cycle through the same thoughts all day, until he smashed his thumb with a hammer because he was so distracted. Pissed off and in pain, he called it a day a couple hours early, leaving Tommy in charge of the site. He needed to get home and put some ice on his thumb.

By some cosmic coincidence, he arrived home at the same time as you and Sarah. He couldn’t hide his thumb from your eagle eyes as the three of you entered the house.

“Jesus Christ, Joel!” you hissed, trying not to swear in front of Sarah, your delicate hand already reaching for his larger, dirtier one. “What happened to your thumb?”

“It got in the way of a hammer,” Joel mumbled, doing his best not to wince as you gently prodded at the swollen digit. He also did his best to ignore the softness of your skin and the warmth of your touch on him, wishing you would touch him everywhere. “You don’t have to fuss, darlin’. It just needs some ice.”

“Oh, hush up, you. Go wash your hands then sit down and relax, I’ll get you some ice and aspirin to help with the swelling. You’re lucky it’s not broken!”

“Bossy lil’ thing, aren’t you,” he grumbled, doing exactly as you ordered once his boots were kicked off to the side of the foyer. Sarah nestled against him on the couch once he sat, fussing over his thumb just as much as you did. His lips quirked upwards at the thought that it meant you both cared about him.

You returned minutes later with a bag of frozen peas, two white pills, and a bottle of cold beer in hand. “Take these,” you directed, offering him the pills and beer. Once he swallowed, you placed the bag on his hand, carefully adjusting it to wrap around his thumb. Your teeth bit into your bottom lip as you concentrated on not hurting him and he nearly groaned as an ache built up in his belly at the sight.

“Thank you, darlin’,” Joel said, voice deep and husky before clearing his throat. His eyes clocked your movements as you stood up straight and your eyes widened when they met his half-lidded gaze. He catalogued the moment to add to the growing list of moments between the two of you that hinted at something deeper, something more lingering in the air.

You waved off his thanks and headed back to the kitchen, calling over your shoulder, “I’ll make some dinner for your two before I leave.”

He wanted to follow you, to let you know he wanted you to stay for dinner, and maybe watch a movie with him and Sarah afterwards, but Sarah’s sweet little voice distracted him.

“Will you help me with my homework, Daddy?” She peered up at him with eyes that matched his own and his heart swelled with love.

“Of course, my little nugget. Let’s see what you’ve got.”

They worked on math problems until you called them for dinner, Joel relieved at the break. An exceptionally bright girl, Sarah didn’t really need his help, but she enjoyed it when he tried. Math made his head hurt, a headache starting to build between his eyes. The headache grew at the sight of only two plates full of spaghetti on the table.

“You’re not eating?” Sarah’s voice squeaked, making her dissatisfaction clear. Turning to him as you shook your head, she added, “Daddy! Tell her she can stay!”

Joel’s mouth barely opened before snapping shut again. You were already speaking, cutting off whatever he would have said.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, nugget. I gotta go now.”

“Oh, okay.” Sarah’s disappointment broke his heart, and Joel felt helpless.

“You sure you can’t stay? I thought maybe we could watch a Disney movie after.” He looked at you with unmasked hope in his eyes. He wanted you to stay even more than his daughter did, but he couldn’t tell you that.

Something flashed in your eyes but disappeared before Joel could figure out what it was. “Sorry, I have plans with a friend and I can’t stay. You two enjoy the movie without me,” you said with a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes. “I’ll come by at 4:30 tomorrow, okay?”

Joel nodded, cringing at the reminder of his date, and watched you leave with a pang of disappointment rivalling Sarah’s.

Emily never changed. She was still the prettiest girl in the room and funny as hell, lifting your mood just like she did back in high school. The pair of you sat at a swanky bar downtown, catching up like you never missed any time together. You stayed in touch a bit over the years, but the distance and different priorities led to your friendship taking a back seat to everything else. Now that you were back, it was easy to dive right back into that unbreakable bond the two of you always shared and pick up where you left off.

You didn’t realize how much you missed that bond until now.

The bar filled with the typical Friday night after work crowd as the two of you sipped at your drinks and rehashed the past few years. Soon, the conversation moved to your current love life – or, more accurately, your complete lack of one.

“So, you seeing anyone lately?” Emily asked, signaling to the bartender that you were ready for another round. “Last I heard, you were with that dude… what was his name? The one that would gaslight you and always insisted your tears were weaponized when he made you cry.”

“Yeah, Tom. That asshole. I wasted too much time on him not knowing any better, but we broke up about a year and a half ago, thank God.” You cringed at the thought of all the emotional damage you had to overcome after that one. You worked hard on finding yourself again after that disaster. “No, I’m not seeing anyone.”

Ever the receptive one, Emily picked up something in your tone that you couldn’t hide. Tilting her head curiously, clocking your movements with her sharp eyes, she continued, “But there’s someone who caught your eye? Do tell!”

Without hesitation, you launched into a long-winded explanation of how you met Joel and how you’re now a mess over the guy.

“Dad’s best friend, huh? When did you become such a cliché?” Emily teased, her shoulder gently bumping yours. “He sounds dreamy, though!”

“I am not a cliché! We don’t all get to all get to marry our high school sweetheart because we met ‘the one’ when we were 15. Talk about a cliché!” You cackled, drawing the attention of two men in suits a few seats down from you, but you ignored them.

“Alright, alright,” Emily mock surrendered. “Back to dad’s best friend. What is the problem? The JB I remember is a cool guy who wouldn’t have a problem with you dating his friend, not when said friend is only a bit older than you and such a good guy.”

That caught you by surprise. “You really think my dad would be okay with it?”

Emily shrugged. “I mean, I haven’t talked to your dad in years, but I remember him being a pretty reasonable guy and he always wanted the best for you. Why wouldn’t he want you to be with someone responsible and caring like this Joel guy?”

You nodded thoughtfully, your teeth worrying your plump bottom lip. “Even if my dad was cool with it, there’s the fact that Joel is not interested. He’s going on a date tomorrow, for fuck’s sake.”

After a moment of consideration, Emily asked, “Does he do that often? Date, I mean.”

You shook your head, fingers dancing absentmindedly along the edge of the bar. “Apparently not. He said it’s the first one in a long time.”

Emily’s eyes narrowed. “And you don’t find the timing suspicious?”

That caught you off guard, your eyes darting to hers. “Should I?”

Shoulders shrugging beneath long layers of dark hair, Emily hummed. “Maybe? From what you just told me about your interactions, I find it interesting that he’s suddenly going on a date. Makes me think he has feelings and he’s struggling with them just like you are.”

“Yeah, I don’t know about that.” You blew off her observations, you couldn’t afford to start having hope now when he was going on a date tomorrow. Instead, you changed the subject. “So, how are you and Ed doing?”

The rest of the night passed in a blur of conversation and mixed drinks with the occasional interruption from a few brave men hitting on you. It crossed your mind to flirt with one or two of them, but you were having too much fun catching up with Emily and blew each of them off. Before you knew it, the hour was late and Emily’s husband, Ed, picked you both up to make sure you got home safe.

“What the hell am I doing?” Joel asked his reflection as he tried on his fourth shirt from his closet. He wasn’t looking forward to this date at all, his mind a mess between feeling guilty about leaving Sarah, the confusing mix of emotions revolving around you, and his complete lack of confidence.

Torn between trying too hard and not trying at all, he huffed in frustration, ripping the buttons of the shirt open before tossing it onto the growing pile of discarded clothes on his bed.

He had no business going on a date. What had he been thinking when he agreed to go?

Joel slumped onto his bed in defeat, his right fist coming up to bump against his forehead. How could he ever think that going on a date would get his mind off you? Not to mention, he felt like a dick for asking you to watch Sarah while he went on said date.

God, he really wasn’t good with this kind of shit.

A glance at the clock got him moving. You were due to arrive shortly, and he had to pick Annica up for a 5:30 reservation Tommy insisted he make. There was no room to dilly dally.

Another glance through his closet and Joel settled on a blue flannel and dark jeans, paired with newer black boots. Best to just be himself, he thought. Using a bit of gel, he pushed his curls back from his face. His beard was freshly trimmed, and he ran his truck through the car wash earlier in the day.

“That’s as good as it’s gonna get,” he said to his reflection before leaving his bedroom, the doorbell ringing as he reached the bottom of the stairs. Joel opened the door to find you standing there, your feet shifting uncertainly. You looked tired, yet beautiful as always and he gulped. “Hey, why didn’t you just come in? You have a key.”

“Hey Joel,” you greeted with a shrug, your voice quiet. Your eyes scanned from his head down to his feet like you were drinking him in. “Just didn’t feel right, I guess.”

“Ok?” Confused, he waited for you to explain, but you kept your mouth shut. Something was off with you. He wondered if something happened last night – you said you had plans, had it been a date of your own? His heart skipped a beat as he shook his head clear. “Well, come on in. You doin’ alright, darlin’?”

“Mmhmm,” you hummed back causing Joel’s brows to pull into a frown as you followed him into the house. “You look nice. Ready for your date?”

Was it just him or did it seem like asking that question pained you? What the fuck was wrong with him? Shaking his head free of thoughts like that, he blushed. “Oh, uh, thanks. As ready as I’ll ever be, I guess.” After a beat, he added, “I’m kinda nervous, actually.”

Joel watched your eyes soften at that. “You shouldn’t be. Any woman would be lucky to go on a date with you.”

Including you? he wondered. There was a wistfulness to your voice that shattered him, leaving him ready to ditch his date and stay there with you and Sarah. “Hey, I, um—”

“You’re here! Finally! Come on, I want to show you something!” Sarah sprinted into the living room, grabbing your hand, and stealing your attention before Joel could finish his sentence. Maybe that was a good thing. God only knows what was about to come out of his mouth.

“Slow down, nugget! I’m coming,” you laughed as the young girl dragged you toward the stairs. It was the first smile of yours Joel glimpsed since you arrived, and his heart beat heavy in his chest when you turned to speak to him over your shoulder, your broad smile dimming with your next words. “Have fun tonight, Joel. You deserve a nice night out.”

“Thanks, darlin’,” he replied, the words heavy in his mouth. Clearing his throat, he called out, “Be good, Sarah! I ordered pizza for you both, should be here soon.”

“I always am, Dad! Love you!” Sarah yelled down the stairs, her attention already focused on whatever she wanted to show you.

“Love you, too.” Joel continued staring up the stairs long after the two of you were out of sight, a sense of yearning knotted deep in his chest. Forcing himself to look away, he grabbed his keys and headed for the door, once again asking himself why the hell he agreed to this date in the first place.

“Can we go see it tonight? Please?” Sarah gazed up at you with her dark eyes widened like a baby cow and you were powerless. How did Joel ever tell this precious, sweet girl ‘no’? It was impossible.

“Let’s see what the showtimes are first. We can’t be out too late.” Scanning the movie listing Sarah pulled up on her tablet, you found the showtimes for the latest kid friendly adventure movie she wanted to see. “There’s one at 6:30. We can totally do that one and still have you home for bedtime. Sound good?”

“Yes! Can we get popcorn?”

“Of course! No trip to the movies is complete without popcorn.”

The two of you ate some pizza before getting ready to go. You liked getting there early enough to find your seats and see the trailers before the movie started. Texting Joel on your way out the door to let him know you were taking Sarah out, the two of you climbed into your car.

The movie theater was busy as usual for a Saturday evening, but you found a good parking spot beneath a light post not far from the entrance. There were lines for tickets and concessions leaving you relieved at arriving early. With tickets in hand, you led Sarah to the shortest of lines in front of the concessions counter. That’s when you saw them.

A tall blonde with big hair and legs for days, wearing tight fitting jeans like a second skin and yapping away while walking closely with a taller man with broad shoulders and curly, dark hair. The man’s sleeves were rolled up, his left hand placed low on the woman’s back, gently guiding her as she gripped a bucket of popcorn and a fountain drink. Another fountain drink was clutched in the man’s right hand. As if he felt the searing heat of your jealous gaze, the man turned, and your stomach plummeted.

Joel’s dark umber eyes met yours in surprise, his hand dropping from the woman’s back as he watched your face fall. He looked uncertain, like he didn’t know whether to carry on with his date or rush to your side. His eyes darted to find Sarah standing at your side, her focus on the snacks displayed within the glass counter. Forcing a half smile to your face, you dipped your head in greeting and turned to move forward, your attention refocusing as it was your turn to plan an order. All the while, your mind raced with thoughts of Joel and his date. Knowing that he wouldn’t want to introduce his daughter on a first date, you never told Sarah that you saw him.

Handing the bucket of popcorn to Sarah, you said, “Careful now. I’ll grab napkins and carry our drinks.” You led the way past the concessions toward the designated theater, which was, thankfully, on the other side of the building from where Joel and his date had been heading.

You phone buzzed in your pocket once you and Sarah were seated – in the middle of the aisle, at Sarah’s insistence, because you’d have the best view. It was a text from Joel.

JM: Sorry darlin’ just saw your text. Hope you and Sarah enjoy your movie.

Torn between responding or just leaving him on read, you went with a third option and gave his message a thumbs up before shoving the phone deep into your pocket. Minutes later, you relented with a sigh, pulling the phone back out to respond a little kindlier.

You: Thanks. I didn’t know you were taking your date to the movies or we would have gone somewhere else.

Bubbles appeared as he was typing, but you didn’t want to see what else he had to say. Silencing your phone, you shoved it back into your pocket.

You were distracted the entire movie, staring blankly at the large screen as you over-analyzed every detail about Joel’s date. She was closer to his age, maybe even a bit older, with big, perky boobs and a pretty face covered with a thick layer of makeup. Her hairstyle fit the old quote, “the bigger the hair, the closer to God” and likely took her an hour or more to style. She made an effort, that’s what seemed to matter. Meanwhile, you sat in the theater with your hair scraped back into a messy ponytail and wearing worn jeans and a hoodie. You felt like a child compared to Joel’s date.

Part of you wanted to hate her for having all the features that Joel apparently found attractive, but you couldn’t. It wasn’t her fault the man you were pining over wasn’t the least bit interested in you.

Finally, the credits rolled, and you pretended to have paid attention to the movie as you listened to Sarah gushing over it for the entire ride back to the Miller house and in the moments between brushing her teeth and tucking her into bed.

The living room couch was particularly comfortable when you sat on it, your body settling into the pillowy cushions with a sigh as you stretched across it. Staring at the ceiling, eyes blinking tiredly, you wondered when Joel would be home, both eager for and dreading his arrival. Still mortified over nearly crashing his date and self-conscious about not fitting the mold of what he found attractive, you wondered what you’d even say to him when he walked through the door.

The pull of sleep too strong to fight, you submitted to the emotional exhaustion, dozing off until a gentle shake of your shoulder caused you to stir.

“Darlin’, go sleep in the spare room,” Joel murmured as you blinked your eyes open.

It took you a moment to come back to your senses, your body following his orders before your brain kicked back to life. He stepped back as you got up, one strong hand reaching out to hold you steady as you wobbled. You met his eyes as the haze of sleep began to clear. He gazed at you with such a soft look you trembled.

“You okay there?” he asked with a quiet laugh and your eyes flicked down to his mouth, catching the glint of something on his cheek, just above his beard. Focusing on that spot, it became clearer. A very distinct lipstick mark. He wasn’t even bothering to hide it.

Wrenching yourself from his gentle grasp, you slipped on your shoes and pulled your keys from your pocket.

Joel watched your every move, confused and clearly not wanting you to leave. “Hey, where are you going? Just take the spare room. You’re still half asleep.”

Shaking your head, you avoided looking at him. “Nah, Imma head home. G’night Joel, see ya Monday,” you said, turning your back on him as you headed for the door. Unable to help yourself as you wrenched the front door open, you added, “Might wanna go clean your face off.”

“What?” his baffled question echoed behind you as the door closed.

tbc

Taglist: @mellymbee@untamedheart81@anoverwhelmingdin@runningmom94@leilanixx@pedropascalfan221@lovelyjess69 @sarahhxx03 @sofiparallel @tammythr @lulawantmula @islacharlotte @allyourfavesinoneblog @lover-of-books-and-tea @pedropascalsbbg @ashleyfilm @brittmb115

[ganymede-princess]

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧ these violent delights | davos blackwood (part 9) *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 ❤️‍🔥| Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 ❤️‍🔥

ship: davos blackwood x fem!oc

warnings: 18+ explicit smut

summary: they fuck

word count: 5333

a/n: this chapter is long asf and I was almost going to publish it as a two parter and leave you all with blue balls once again but I decided to just wait it out until I finished it! So sorry about the extra long wait. Next chapter is the END (I hope) not counting the epilogue okay bye

written by @ganymede-princess

When Cersha returned to her chamber, she was not surprised to see Davos perched on the bay windowsill, his fingers laced around his bent knee while his injured leg stretched out beside him. She had expected him to be blistering mad at her abrupt dismissal earlier that afternoon, but he was a vision of weary resignation as his forehead rested on the glass. The watery light filtered through the fresh linen shirt he had dressed in, showing the curve of his torso and the sinewy length of his arms. He lifted his head and smiled as the door creaked shut, she saw that he was rid of the patchy beard that had grown in the twelve days since the battle. Had it really been such a short time?

“My, I’ve never seen you so clean.” She teased.

“All in service of you, my lady.” He got shakily to his feet and bowed mockingly.

“Davos, please.” She sighed, the elation of her epiphany at the sept already waning.

“What?” He cocked his head to the side and offered a slanted smirk. “I’m your sworn protector, aren’t I? Chastely sworn… we both know how that turned out, now don’t we?”

She reddened at the memory of his lips stamping wet marks across her skin. She said nothing, only rolling her eyes. He sat back heavily on the sill and clucked his tongue.

“Were you sitting on that lie for long?”

“Only since…” She drifted off, feeling a wave of residual panic at the memory of the night before. Davos’ face softened and she shied away from the earnestness of it. “Look, I’m sorry. I am. I just, I wasn’t sure how Oscar would take it if he knew who you were or that a Blackwood had killed a Night’s Watchman on his land, I thought he might…”

“Execute me on the spot?”

“No! No, he’d never kill unless he had to. I was afraid he may send you back to your family to be punished for desertion, or that he might have just thrown you in the dungeon or something for starting this whole mess.”

“’Starting this whole mess,’ is that what you think? Is that why you still don’t trust me after all we’ve been through?”

“No! You were defending your family’s honour, I cannot fault you that, but the battle began with the swing of your sword. That is the truth. I feared Oscar’s retribution, but his ire is for the lord regent who instructed the default on the assize.”

“Always trying to protect me, aren’t you? What ire could that boy have? He looks as if-”

“As much ire as I’ll have if you speak ill of him.” He just scoffed and shook his head. “Asides, it matters not. Oscar recognised you.”

“I could have told you that,” He said. “If you’d only told me of your plans.”

“I see that now.” She ran a hand through her hair. “I surmised you would not take kindly to concealing your identity from the regent high lord. I did not want to fight you.”

“Why?” His expression darkened as he pushed to his feet and limped a step closer to her. “Are you afraid of me?” A step closer. “Think I might kill you?”

Another step closed the gap between them, his hand coming to rest feather-light on her neck. Her eyelids drooped as the tickles of his callouses fizzed through her brain.

“We’ve come this far crow boy.” She looked up through her lashes, seeing him obscured behind soft focus and beige streaks. “If you wanted to kill me, you would have done it by now.” She pressed forward until there was a slight pressure on her throat. “I’ve seen the fire in you, but I’m not scared. It burns for me, does it not?”

“Aye.” He swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing as his pupils blew out into glossy black discs in the confines of his dark eyes. “All for you, my lady.”

That was enough to make her melt into his touch, savouring the warm, full feeling that radiated from his rough hand as it formed the perfect collar around her swan-curved neck. That feeling, not of possession but of belonging, as people sometimes belong to each other. Her hands found his neck in some attempt to mirror the experience back to him, thumbs stroking the smooth skin from his ears to his collarbones as his eyes drifted closed. His breaths grew ragged as he leaned in to rest his forehead on hers.

“I think…” His nose brushed hers, lips so close that every breath was a heady exchange of essence, hearts racing in syncopated time. “...I want to know what it’s like to kiss you.”

“Is that so surprising?” Her fingers stroking his jaw pulsed a rhythm in his veins.

“I don’t kiss.” He growled weakly, stomach fluttering like a virgin maid.

“Why?” Her breath on his lips was the ghost of a kiss.

“Brings all sorts of… feelings.” Her hands were in his hair now, scratching gently at his scalp and savouring the rabbity softness of his freshly washed locks until blissful tremors weakened his knees.

“Is that such a bad thing?” He let go of a whimper as she rubbed her nose against his.

“If I kiss you, I’ll never stand to be parted from you. I’ll have to marry you.”

She pulled back, all the silvery feeling rushing through the channel of their meeting eyes.

“Kiss me.”

In that soft afternoon light, safe at last behind the stony battlements with the dull roar of the rushing moat shielding them from silence, in a room lovingly furnished with the colours of their liege, with the perfumed steam from the bath behind the fish mural divider wreathing around them, they shook off their houses like two bucks losing their antlers in spring. It was as if there had been a levee between them, weeping water from long spiderweb cracks, and now the stones came bursting out and there it was. The torrent of feeling, the lips parting, the passion, the crush, the smelting together of two beings in this primeval ritual.

At last they broke apart, her gasping for air and him kissing down her neck, whining against her perfect skin.

“Davos.” She panted. He nipped her. She took a handful of black hair and tugged it firmly. “Davos!”

“Mm…” He tilted his head back and she saw his eyes clouded by lust.

“Behave.” She pecked his swollen lips. “I must bathe first. I stink.”

A mischievous grin spread across his face and he buried his nose in her neck, inhaling deeply.

“You smell-” Sniff. “-fantastic.”

As she lifted her arm to push him away he stuck his face right into the pit and drew in a long breath.

“Like a woman.” He sighed dreamily and began peppering kisses across her chest.

“Get away!” She laughed, lifting her arms and throwing back her head to give him more access to the skin exposed by her dress. “You foul beast.”

He just chuckled and kissed all over her collarbones, bending double as she backed away until they bumped into the tub. He whined when he realised where they had ended up.

“Sweetling.” He pouted, trying to coax her back toward the bed.

“Davos, anyone would think you’re starving.” She rolled her eyes with an exasperated smile. “Come on. Won’t you wash my hair for me?”

“You know slavery is outlawed in the Seven Kingdoms?”

“Just get in the bath.” She pursed her lips derisively, letting her hands wander up under his shirt to explore the dips and curves of his back. “Just… soak with me for a while. Please?”

He scoffed and she could see him fighting against a blissful smile as her nails raked up his spine.

“Fine.”

“Thank you.” She murmured. “Was that so hard?”

He smiled in that exasperated way, peeled off his shirt and dropped his breeches and underclothes in a swift, practical motion. For an instant she was stunned by the beauty of him; the subtle dips and rises of muscle on his thin limbs and torso, the grazes, bruises and old faded scars that each served as a reminder of passionate fury roused when something he loved was at risk, and the supple pink skin of his dick that hung half-hard by his thigh.

“What?” He grinned. “Like what you see?”

“Your wound.” She pointed to the bandage on his thigh, trying to save face.

“Of course.” He rolled his eyes. “Do you want me in the bath or not?”

She bit her lip.

“You can dress it again later.” He had pulled it off and clambered awkwardly into the milky water before she had the chance to protest, gripping both sides of the tub as he gingerly lowered himself down. “Gods, that’s lovely.”

“You’re always putting yourself in harm’s way for me.”

“You love it.” She did love it. “Though I hardly think a bath can be considered ‘harm’s way.’ Besides, this is far nicer than the bath they drew for me. Just hot water, a rag and a bar of soap. No…” He picked out a floating rose petal and inspected it before letting it float away like a grumpkin’s sailboat. “...luxury.”

She noticed then that she had indeed been showered in what little frills Riverrun could afford with an encroaching war. Roses from the gardens floating on water white from goat’s milk; she suspected from the lactonic, pastoral scent that it was not the cow’s milk favoured by most highborn ladies for bathing. The water was silky through her fingers, from salt and honey she assumed, and lavender oil turned the steam heavy and narcotic.

“The boy favours you still.” Davos remarked as he reached for a brown-skinned pear from the tray on the side table, cut in half and loaded high with soft cheese and a crust of walnuts, and popped the whole thing in his mouth, wiping the juice with the back of his hand.

“Enough about Oscar.” She flicked a scoop of water at him, making him sputter. “And don’t eat all those, I’m starving. Did they not feed you earlier?”

“They did, but I’m never satisfied, my lady.” He smiled sweetly. “Minnows and cress on toast, though the ones you catch are far sweeter.”

“Thank you.” She preened, though his flattery was obvious, and took a pear for herself, a little moan escaping her at the flavour. “I must confess, I have missed real food. I hope they give us lamb tonight, or veal. Something that’s fed on grass and hasn’t had to fight for every morsel-”

“Are you getting in or not?”

She huffed at his blunt tone and expectant face, and finished her pear in two irritated bites. The amusement on his face was almost enough to make her storm off, but stronger than the annoyance that was only heightened by the bubbling fear of removing her clothes in front of him was her desire to be close to him. She turned her back to him and unlaced her dusty riding gown, letting it fall in a heap at her feet. In just her smallclothes, she hesitated. His eyes burned her from behind as the air burned her from inside. She heard the water slosh and Davos’s hand found hers, dripping water on her gown.

“Hey.” He said softly, squeezing her hand gently until she turned and met his eyes. “I’m not gonna hurt you. I’m not gonna laugh at you. Whatever you’re afraid of-” He tapped his temple. “It’s in here. I think you’re beautiful.”

She closed her eyes, letting the words settle inside her, then lifted his hand to the lacing on her top. In a few deft movements he had pulled it loose, letting her free herself from it along with the bottoms. Instinct told her to cover herself, but she balled her fists and held them at her sides, letting his gaze roam across her form. She had always thought of herself as ungainly, all sharp angles and no curves, but under his eyes she felt her jutting hip and shoulder bones held the beauty of an ancient gnarled willow, and her long sinewy arms still covered in dirt were like the wings of a falcon rising from a bath of dust. She was a dryad and she glowed.

“You are…” He kissed her hand. “…so…” Again. “...fucking…” Once more. “...gorgeous. Gods, I don’t know what you’ve done to me, woman. You’re all I ever think about.”

The haze of steam caught the candlelight and danced in wisps around him. His hair turned black as pitch in the damp, the blood rose to his cheeks, and beneath that deep grey, his eyes were so green. Green like moss and agate and beetle wings. He was made of frown lines and scars, taut muscle, crooked teeth and passion like fire.

“Davos.” Her hand found his face. “I meant to say before, but… I suppose I was frightened. But, you’re- you’re… a vision. I am so glad to have met you.”

She kissed him, and for a moment it was all lips and fig sweetness until he smiled against her.

“Get in the bath.”

“Fine.”

She tried to glower as she clambered in beside him, but the warm embrace of the water was far too enticing. The surface sloshed as he spread his knees, making room for her to sit between his legs, and the level rose so high it nearly ran over the edge when they were both settled.

“Was that so hard?” He mumbled as he kissed her shoulder.

“Shut up.”

They sat that way for a while, cloistered in hot silky water. She ate her pears and washed the dirt from her skin, and he hummed a ballad so sweet that she could have cried. When she was done he freed her filthy hair from the braid, lathered it with soap and washed it with deft fingers massaging her scalp. She could not help the little groans of satisfaction that escaped her at the gentle tickling touch. She could feel him pressing into her back as he fisted her wet hair tightly and let his lips rest flush against the shell of her ear, his hot breath sending tingles to her toes.

“I’m warning you, my lady, if you keep making those filthy noises I might take right here in the bath.”

“Maybe you ought to.” Her voice was barely more than a whisper.

“Would you like that?” His lips parted to kiss her ear and she felt her eyes slip out of focus at the sensitivity there.

“Please.”

His free hand found her nipple, already a hard, pink marble beneath the hot water, and rolled it between his thumb and forefinger. Her hips lifted and her hand fell between her spreading legs in an involuntary response.

“Please, please,” Came his rough whisper. “Please what, my lady?”

“Please…” She gasped. “Please touch me.”

“Where? Where can I touch to please you, my sweet-” Kiss. “-virtuous-” Kiss. “-Bracken-”

A slosh of water hit the ground as she whipped around and took hold of his cock, feeling it hard, yet supple under her grasp like a lance wrapped in silk. He whimpered as she pulled her hand in slow, deliberate motions around the head.

“If you don’t stop teasing me I’ll rip it off, I swear.”

“There she is.” He relinquished his grip on her hair as he rocked his hips, letting his length slide through her hand as he gripped her thighs. “There’s the fire.”

He pulled her legs apart without another thought and ran his fingers along her slit. She was slick where the water had not washed it away, and he could feel the folds of her were swollen blooms beneath the wiry swathe of hair. She jolted when he found that little button at the top, a high keening coming from her throat at that sweet agony.

“It’s okay now, my love.” He assured her.

“It’s…” She whined. “It’s so…”

“It’s so good, sweetling, I know. I know.”

He spread her open with one hand, pulling back the hood of skin that covered that nub and rubbed his fingers in steady circles, drawing moans from her like music from a harp. Her hips pushed up against him and she lost hold of his cock, but he didn’t care. All he wanted was that beautiful rhythm of her reaching for him, reaching for that incomprehensible height. His fingers slowed, he needed her lucid for a moment.

“Cersha.” He spoke against her ear. “Are you listening darling?”

“Mm.” She nodded, desperately pushing up against the minute rotations of his digits.

“Have you ever touched yourself?”

She nodded again.

“On the inside?”

“No.” She shook her head, her voice strained. “Never inside.”

A puff of breath escaped him.

“Do you…” She panted. “Like that about me?”

“Does it make me… perverse if I do?” He growled. “If I want to claim you before anyone, before even you?”

“I want it to be you.” She admitted freely.

“Then it will be me.” He kissed her cheek reassuringly, his fingers circling her bud a faster now.

He worked on her for a while, bringing her back to the peak, and as pleasure rolled through her like white-capped waves, a finger plunged inside her. It slid in so easily that she scarcely registered the change until she grew aware of a strange tightening, and a thickness that she clenched against. She gasped, earning a chuckle from her lover.

“Is that good?”

She nodded, her hand flying to her mouth as he began to slowly, incrementally pump it in and out. Just as she was growing used to the rhythm, he curled his finger inwards and seemed to hit some strange point that sent a jolt of pleasure through her. She shrieked and covered her face.

“That’s good, isn’t it, sweetling?”

He nuzzled the side of her face as his fingers rapidly fluttered against her sweet spot, his palm bumping her bud, radiating syrupy, heady sensation. She gave a little yelp and buried her face in his neck, making him grin.

“More…” She managed to say. “...please.”

“As you wish.”

She felt empty for a moment as he drew back his finger, but soon enough she was gasping against the overflowing fullness of two thick, calloused digits drawing over that sponge of mystifying bliss.

“Gods, you’re tight.” He muttered darkly, thrusting them as deeply as he could.

“Davos, I think- I think I’m...”

“Let go, my love.” He whispered, his hand moving at an impossible pace. “Cum for me.”

It was those rough-spun words that were her undoing. She seized and gripped the bathtub, rolling over the wave of boiling pleasure. It was a brief thing, a blink of bliss wherein her thoughts were entirely drowned out, clenching rhythmically around his digits until she relaxed, flopping back against his silken torso. His arms found their way around her stomach and he squeezed her tight against him.

“You did so well, sweetling.” He rocked her gently for a while, until she felt strong enough to speak.

“That thing you did for me at the inn,” Her voice was barely above a whisper. “That thing you did with your mouth...”

“I ate out your cunny, sweetling, that’s what I did.” His eyes stirred with lust and mischief. “You want more?”

“No- yes, but no. I want to do it for you. I want to- to…”

“You want to suck my cock?” He put a hand to her cheek, his expression a mix of want and concern. “You don’t have to, Cersha. It’s gruelling work, I should know.”

“What do you mean?”

His cheeks tinted and a strange flash of agony passed over his face before he shook it away.

“Well, I’m no stranger to buggery, but I always preferred the fairer sex. Let’s leave it at that.” She felt a rush of curiosity at his words, and he must have noticed as he sighed moodily. “One day, I’ll tell you about the boy. I promise.” She swallowed her questions and nodded. “Shall we move to the bed?”

She got up eagerly, splattering more water onto the floor as she went, but was slightly alarmed to find her legs were already trembling. She offered Davos her hands, and he eyed them speculatively for a moment. She thought he might try to drag himself up on his own, but he took her help and soon they stood, holding one another as the water rolled off them in rivers. He giggled impishly, kissing her all over and before either of them knew it they were flopping down on the bed, still sopping wet like two otters in heat.

“We’re getting the sheets wet.” She protested weakly.

“We’ll sleep in my chambers.” He muttered, shuffling around until his injured leg had room to stretch out. “The bed is just as soft, if not so lovingly furnished.”

“Are you comfortable?” She fussed, hating the sight of his wound without a bandage. The messy sutures she had administered had been replaced by neat little stitches since they had arrived at Riverrun; the work of a Maester, Cersha supposed.

He put his hand to her cheek, a half-mocking look of amusement on his face.

“I am not made of glass. Now, are you sure you want to do this?” She nodded eagerly, and he guided her face gently downward. “Alright, I’ll show you how.”

She settled herself by his waist and watched, almost in awe, as he spit in his hand and gently tugged his length. The fold of skin pulled back and slipped easily up and down the moist, pink tip. He groaned lightly as he worked on himself, and in a few smooth strokes he had grown stiff and engorged. Cersha felt her mouth water, and was surprised to find that she felt no shame. She knew he would be big- in the pitch dark of that night in the inn, she had felt his impossible length slide through her hand- but nothing could have prepared her to actually see a man’s naked form, and it excited her more than she cared to admit.

“Put your mouth around the tip.” He instructed, using his free hand to gather her hair and hold it at the base of her neck. “Use your lips to block your teeth, that’s it, darling.”

She had to stretch her mouth wide to take him in, but it was worth it for the salty sweetness that spread across her tongue.

“Good girl.” He growled. “Good girl. Now feel around with your tongue. Do you feel that?That ridge, just there, right- right there.”

On the tip of her tongue rested a firm seam of skin, just at the base of the head. She flickered her tongue across it in a rapid flurry, and he whimpered. His hips lifting and an inch more of his length entered her mouth triggering a gulp of surprise.

“Oh, yes. Yes, sweetling that’s it, that’s it, just focus on the head.” With his hand in her hair he tenderly guided her head up and down, up and down, never forcing himself any deeper than she could comfortably take. “Bob your head like that, just take it in and out. You don’t-” He interrupted himself with a weak grimace. “-you don’t have to take it deep. It’s lovely if you do, but… but just do what you can, darling. Keep working with your tongue, you’re doing beautifully my love.”

He relinquished his grip on her hair, trusting her to keep up the rhythm, and wrapped his hand around his shaft, jerking himself into her mouth, while his other hand found his plump stones, rolling them in his palm. Cersha gripped his thighs, growing light-headed as she moaned and slurped around the size of him. It seemed he had given up on words, and instead fell into a frenzy of… moans? No, growls. He was like an animal, half-way between deep rumbles and high keening whines, his hips rolling and thrusting upward, seeming to forget his earlier gentleness. She took him deeper, gagging as he hit the back of her throat. Before she knew it, his hands were on her forehead and he was pushing her off of him.

“Did- did I bite you?” She gasped.

“No! Darling, no, I made you gag.” He struggled to sit up and held her face in his hands, stroking her hair, his face a mask of concern. “I cannot believe I did that, I’m so sorry, Cersha.”

“You didn’t mean to!” She eagerly reached for him again, but he caught her hand and kissed them all over.

“Still.” He implored. “I’m sorry. Besides, we had to stop. I would have finished in your mouth, I’m sure you wouldn’t like that.”

She considered for a moment.

“I… I suppose not.”

His face softened sympathetically.

“I want you to… to, um, to cum, though. It’s only fair.”

He chuckled at her choice of words and kissed her forehead.

“I can use my hand, if only you kiss me while I do it.” He gauged her disappointment with an impish smirk. “Or… I could fuck you, I suppose. If you want me to, that is.”

“Oh, please!”

He tossed his head back and laughed, pulling her into his embrace.

“Oh, my girl…” He pushed her wet hair away from her eyes. “I would work for hours like a draft horse if it would please you.”

He struggled to heave himself up, but she pushed him back by the shoulders. He made a little oof sound and his puggish nose crinkled in annoyance.

“I’m not an invalid.”

“I’d rather it this way.”

A grin dimpled his cheeks and his eyes glittered.

“Oh, really?” She just smiled knowingly and set about piling up pillows behind him to prop him up. He sighed dreamily. “I feel like a princess.”

“Prince of Crows,” She murmured, straddling him. “On a weirwood throne… with…” Her fingertips found his forehead. “…a red eye.”

He noticed her eyes had crossed out of focus, half closed. He took her by the arms and gave her a gentle shake that seemed to rouse her.

“You’re a witch, Bracken.” He laughed, though his heart thundered in his chest.

“I get it from my mother.” She shook her head, giggling nervously. “Anyway…”

Her hand reached between her legs to find his cock, stroking it gently. He laughed airily, happy to forget her strange words. The calloused pads of his fingers found their way to slide along her slit, and he scoffed.

“Gods, you get wet from nothing.” He seemed almost annoyed as he sunk two digits into her with no resistance. “Soaking wet…”

He withdrew and held up his fingers to show the glistening slickness that coated them, then slid them into his mouth. She gasped as he wantonly swirled his tongue around them, and pulled them out with a pop.

“The sweetest I’ve ever tasted.” He told her. “The only one I ever wish to taste again. I suppose mine could not have been such a joy to sample.”

“It was beautiful.” She kissed him, catching the ghost of herself on his lips. “You are beautiful.”

“Ah, I’m a busted old thing.” He flushed, lining himself up with her entrance. “But, thank you all the same, my lady.”

She felt the very tip of him sliding into her, and she hesitated.

“Davos, I… I do not wish to have a child.”

He palmed her cheek, as he loved to do.

“Then no child you shall have. I will spill myself upon your stomach every night until we are married, and every night thereafter until you feel the time is right.”

“And if I do not wish to marry?”

“Then unmarried we shall be.”

“And if I never want a child?” She thought of her mother then, the screams, the smell of blood like iron…

A pained expression crossed his face, but it was gone as soon as it was there.

“Then no child you shall have.”

“Do you promise?”

“On mine honour.” She searched his eyes for a sign of dishonesty, but found none, so she nodded.

She sunk down onto him, feeling her inner muscles clench and tent out as they adjusted to the thickness prising them apart. It hurt, it could not be avoided, his girth was simply too great. At the alert of her pained whimpers, he gripped her hips, holding her up until he was sure she had taken enough time to grow used to the feeling. He held her steady as she incrementally shimmied down, down, down until he bottomed out with an inch or two to spare. She cried out as she felt him pressing his bruising tip into her roof, but by then it had become a good pain, a cleansing pain.

“My girl.” He murmured. “My sweet girl.”

She lifted up from her knees, focusing on that exquisite feeling of his veins and ridges sliding against her walls, then lowered back down. Up and down, up and down, she repeated the action until she noticed he was holding his breath.

“Is that alright?”

“Yes,” He managed to utter, panting. “Gods, you’re just so tight. I can’t… I can’t see myself lasting long at this rate.”

She giggled as he whined, his hands finding her buttocks and bouncing her up and down on his rigid length, deeper and harder until she collapsed against him, grasping him like a tree in a windstorm. She grunted as he adjusted her on his lap and hit that sweet place inside her.

“Oh, fuck!” She hissed.

“That’s it, isn’t it?” His hot breath passed across her ear. “That’s the spot.”

“Oh, gods, Davos…”

He pumped upwards as he bounced her, and she felt his tip rubbing across her sweet spot before it punched against her roof, every single time. It was brutal, yet tender, and she could feel his restraint. She knew then that this man could fuck like an animal if she set him loose.

“You’re my girl.” He insisted. “Say you’re my fucking girl.”

“I’m y-your…” She spluttered. “I’m…”

Suddenly it stopped. He held her up, nothing but the tip left in her. She wriggled in his grasp, desperate for that overwhelming in-out-in-out-in-out.

“Say it, sweetling.” He cooed.

“I-I’m your girl.”

“Fuckin’ aye, you are.”

He plunged her back down, filling her in one thrust. Wave after wave of pleasure built up inside her, pump after pump, after pump until she had to bite into his shoulder to contain the half shrieking moans that had taken over her speech. It was this that broke his restraint, and as his thrusts grew sloppy, he slammed into her, fingers digging into her bony frame so harshly that they would have drawn blood were his nails longer.

“I’m c-”

The climax struck her dumb and she let out a guttural snarl as it seized all sense and reason from her. She clenched on his cock, still incessantly moving inside her, again, again, again, her eyes rolling, white fishes shimmering across her vision, until finally-

“Fuck!”

He pulled out, furiously rubbing his cock as he reached his own peak, his body stiffening and writhing as he spilled his hot seed onto her stomach. When he was done, he paused for a moment, eyes glazed and staring at nothing, until he noticed her and a flash of feeling passed across them. He did not hesitate to pull her to him, the strength of his arms evident as he crushed her against his torso, caring nothing for the stickiness there. It was then that she realised she was weeping. For what, she did not know. Perhaps, just the beauty of it all.

“Shh, shh.” His voice was flute soft again. “My beautiful girl.”

When she had regained some composure, she cleared her throat, forehead resting against his.

“I fear we need another bath.”

Thanks to my lovelies @aemondslove @disillusioned-phantasma @anaviieiraaa @deepestlovert @flordiakilos @kitty2984 @kpopfanfictionfantacies @sometings @nikkilsworld @gladiatorgladiator @borislava17 @oshun22 @spider-stark @marvelenthusiast10 @itsyagirl01 @nixtape-foryou @giggles-andkicks @benijbol @darlingcharling-blog @writervaul-t @kayrakhan @unicorntrooper @frogoerson @aphroditeanadyomene @councilofcastamere @ellxpsismm @teapomp @fuckalrighty for your reblogs and comments! I'm doing it for you guys :)

[lamentationsofalonelypotato]

You Call It Madness But I Call It Love

Chapter 9: Wedding Bells or Gong of Destruction?

Pairing: Soldier Boy x f!reader, Reader POV

Summary: When the reader left Payback 40 years ago after a falling out with her childhood best friend she never looked back, but when two men show up to her apartment and start asking her questions about the past, the reader begins to think those things can’t stay hidden and starts to question what’s real and what’s fantasy.  This is a re-telling of The Boys Season 3, where the reader is a supe who's known Soldier Boy since 1927. The chapters will fluctuate between past and present. This is chapter nine of my "You Call It Madness But I Call It Love" series. (I'm so bad at summaries please forgive me!)

Word Count: 3.3K

Warnings: References to sex, Cursing (a few times), Soldier Boy might be, is, really, absolutely, a little OOC, pining, fluff, some angst.

Note: This is told from Reader's perspective. Any references to the reader is made using you or your. There is minimal use of y/n. I tried my best to proofread, but nobody's perfect. Reader is described as "curvy" occasionally. If you don’t like, don’t read, but if you do like, you’re my favorite!

Internal Monologue is in first person and is in italics

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

****************************************

Philadelphia 1941

You paced at the foot of your bed, wringing your hands together, heartbeat frantic against your ribcage as your world seemed to spin to a stop. You didn't know whether you wanted to laugh or cry, scream or sob, throw up or have a stroke. Your entire body was electrified with your nerves, popping and crackling loud in your ears as the impulses jumped from synapse to synapse with ease.

And it was Howard's fault.

After three years of courting, of you trying to make up excuses to lengthen the distance between you two, of trying to find a way out, of trying to find a way to tell Ben that you loved him, it had finally happened, Howard had proposed. It wasn't out of the blue, you had been courting long enough and you were well past the age of usual engagement, something your mother continued to point out, but that didn't make any of this any easier.

Your eyes drop to the offensive chunk of jewelry on your left hand. Not only was it the ugliest ring you’d ever seen, but it was from the wrong man. You knew that deep down in your bones, knew it the second Howard came to Sunday night dinner and dropped to one knee in front of you. Hell, you knew it the second you met Howard for the first time. He was nothing compared to Ben, no one was.

You had looked Howard in the eye stunned, unable to speak, then raised your eyes to your father and mother hoping to find your voice and a plausible excuse, but before you could give him the honest answer you knew in your heart to be true, your mother had shouted "Of course she will!"

Because she's controlled everything else about my life, of course she'd do this as well.

Your tried again not to think about how ugly the ring and how it was utterly wrong for you in every way. When Howard dropped to one knee and opened the velvet box, all you could think of was Ben. You wondered what ring Ben would have chosen for you and wondered if the ring from him would have been right.  He knew you better than anyone else.

Which begged the question: shouldn't your fiancé?

You tried not to compare your best friend to Howard, because you knew who would win. Every time you began to compare them, Ben had more pros than Howard did. But you couldn't keep waiting for Ben, didn't want to. Howard was promising you a future, a family, marriage-

A loveless one. The thought is immediate and makes your heart seize in your chest.

You knew that a marriage with Ben would be different, filled with passion, romance, love-

But he doesn't love you. So basically if Ben married you it would be the same for him as you marrying Howard. A one-sided love.

Despite dating Howard, you still allowed Ben in your life. Ben stayed over whenever he wished, walked with you to the park, stole you away for drinks in the bar down the street where Howard wouldn't be caught dead in, and took you to the occasional baseball game. Howard didn't drink and he didn't like being outside. Those moments with Ben made you feel more alive than you'd ever felt and then you'd meet Howard later and try to summon the enthusiasm to sit with him at dinner, all the while you were still buzzing with happiness from seeing Ben.

It made you feel like a traitor, feeling that good and thinking about another person while Howard tried to be everything you wanted.

Whenever Howard would kiss you goodnight, it made you feel like you were kissing a statue, cold, unfeeling, and despite his attempts to slide his tongue in your mouth it was passionless. And it made you think about what Ben said about Howard's name and what he would be like in bed, as improper as it was. You think back to all the moments you and Ben had been pressed against one another when you woke up in the morning, how perfectly you fit against him. Whenever Howard tried to hug you or hold you close it was all wrong. He wasn't tall enough or broad enough, not to mention sometimes you thought if he'd even be able to pick you up. Howard was more lanky than muscular, certainly not as strong as Ben, who picked you up one time on a dare from Adam when you were all really drunk.

Howard didn’t make you feel warm when he touched you accidently, he didn’t make you feel brave whenever your mother was around, and he certainly didn’t make you feel as happy as you did when you were with Ben. Not to mention he never let you draw him, said that there were more important things that he could be doing rather than siting there posing for you.

Howard wasn’t spontaneous. He’d show up exactly on time, call when he said he would, time every single minute of your dates and he certainly never tried to surprise you the way Ben did. The only time Howard ever seemed excited about anything was when he was talking about the fiscal progress of the United States in comparison to Europe, which he weaseled into every conversation you had together.

Even when he asked you to marry him it sounded more like a business proposal than a happy moment. You always thought that when you got engaged the other person would make at least some confession of love. He hadn’t done that. Howard successfully sucked the life out of a moment you thought you would remember forever. You couldn’t even remember what he said before he got on one knee, just the awkward silence and the feeling of dread that clamped tight around your heart when he asked you the question that ruined your life.

Legally am I bound to this, because technically my mother said yes for me?

You wondered if Howard proposed because the U.S was finally joining in the war or if he genuinely loved you. He brought by flowers often, roses even though you liked lavender more, brought by caramels even though you liked chocolates, and sent you books on the financial history of the United States that were helpful when you couldn't sleep at night, they sent you right off, not to mention you'd started sketching street scenes in the pages making them much more interesting, but you weren't going to show Howard that. His head would probably explode.

You sigh again, pacing faster at the end of your bed.

Howard wanted a quick wedding within the week before he shipped out to military training on Friday, and maybe you should be scared about your fiancé going to war, but the only person you were worried about was Ben. He'd probably also join the military to prove something to his father and take your heart with him when he left. You knew that Ben was the only one you wanted to hold your heart in his hands.

You look back down at the ring on your finger, filled with dread and thoughts about a passionless future.

How am I going to tell Ben?

The tap on your window is familiar, but frightens you, because you didn't know how to tell him or how he'd react. Each time you brought up Howard around him, Ben would make a sarcastic comment and change the subject. You think about the night you danced together, when Ben said that you couldn't be Howard's and also his friend.

Does that mean he'll never want to be apart of my life when we get married?

The thought makes your heart break. You couldn't imagine a life without Ben and you didn't want to, but you could image a life without Howard.

Ben is crouched in the window, a wide smile on his face,  but this time he doesn't wait for you to let him in, he rolls up the window himself and he crosses the room to hug you.

The hug surprises you. You were usually the one that initiated them, but the hug breaks something in your chest and you hug him back tighter than you ever had to stop the tears from falling, pressing your face into his rumpled suit.

"Hey Sweetheart." Ben pulls back, but frowns when he looks at your face. "What's wrong?" Ben's hand gently cups your cheek, trailing warmth where his fingertips touch. You're surprised at the boldness of his touch, but you ascribe it to the alcohol, given the sharp tang of whiskey that floats through the air between you.

"Nothing." You clear your throat, stepping back so his hand falls and covering your ring finger on your left hand with your right nonchalantly. "How are you?"

Ben frowns for a minute at your reaction, but then shakes it off. "I've got great news." He smiles so wide that it makes the urge to cry rise in the back of your throat again.

You knew that as soon as you married Howard he would forbid you from seeing Ben. He already had after the night at the dance hall, but you didn't pay attention to him. Unfortunately, you knew that once you were married you wouldn’t be able to defy his wishes. You respected what marriage represented far too much to cross that line.

"Um me too." You smile tightly, your heartbeat so loud you wonder if Ben can hear it.

"Oh. Well-" Ben begins to say, wanting to let you talk.

"No. Please, you go first."

He won't tell me what news he has if I say my piece about Howard.

"Well, I've been thinking about what you said to me the other day about trying to figure out what I want-"

You remembered the conversation clearly. It was another day at Fairmount Park and it was an attempt to get Ben to start thinking about his future, though when you had told him to figure out what he wanted you hoped that it meant he would consider you, consider turning your friendship into something more. Your heart surges, hoping that this is it, this is Ben finally saying that loves you, that he wants to be with you.

"And I'm finally going to make something of myself." Ben's green eyes shine brightly with his excitement.

"Huh?" Your heart sinks.

"I talked to my dad." You don't miss the way Ben's jaw tightens when he says it. "And I've decided to enlist-"

"Enlist! Ben-" It takes all you have to beg him not to go, not to leave you here. Because you knew that you couldn't live without him and the thought that he would die overseas in a war destroyed you.

"Wait, listen." Ben smiles wider, confusing you. "My dad has friends in the war department, friends that are looking for volunteers for a military project."

"A military project?"

"It's a serum or an injection that's supposed to make us stronger, better-"

"What do you mean?" You ask mildly confused. You hadn't heard of the government announcing any kind of experiments or projects in the newspapers. Surely Howard would have told you about it, he was always boring you with things like that.

"I'm a not a scientist" Ben shakes his head. "But all I know is that they're looking for volunteers and they want men and women."

Surprise flits through your mind. It was odd that they were also asking for women. Although you knew that the military was beginning to accept women in their ranks, it was still surprising that they wanted female volunteers for a government project. Especially if they were experimenting on them.

Like lab rats?

"What are you saying?" You're still confused as to what he's trying to tell you, unusual given the fact that you were usually very good at reading him.

"I want you come with me." Ben can hardly contain his excitement, his smile is so wide it nearly splits his face.

It was the last thing you expected him to ask. "What?" You blink.

"I don't want to do this without you." He says in a tone that makes your heartbeat stop. "And I want you to come with me." He repeats.

Your immediate reaction is to scream yes, let him take you away from all of this, but then you remember Howard, and your mother and feel the weight begin to settle on your shoulders again.

"Ben I can't." It breaks your heart to say it to him, to watch how his face falls.

“Why not?”

"Howard is-"

"Come on, you really think things are going to work out with that son of a bitch?" Ben shouts so loud you're afraid that he'll wake up your parents.

"He loves me-" You begin to say, the urge to cry coming back strong, burning against your eyes. Because now it was that you were choosing Howard over him, even though you didn't want to, it was what your mother wanted. The future she laid out for you.

"You don't know that." Ben snaps, rolling his eyes.

"Ben, he-" You struggle to find your words, taking in a deep breath to strengthen your voice. "He- he proposed. I mean it's been three years, we're both of age-"

Ben's eyes drop to your left hand and this time you uncover your hand so he can see the engagement ring. His shoulders tense and the muscle in his jaw clenches and unclenches.

"When did he ask you?" Ben says in almost a growl.

"Tonight. He came to dinner, my mother is so excited-" You successfully keep the tremor from your voice, but it quickly feels like you're running out of air.

"But you're not." Ben mutters

"Of course I am-" Your voice cracks with emotion.

"No you're not." Ben raises his gaze to look at you.  "I know you." The look in his eyes is unfamiliar, almost afraid.

But Ben isn't scared of anything. You try to remember a moment that he acted afraid, the only time is the memory of when you first met, when his father was looking for him and you lied to help him hide. Ben was fearless, it was something that you admired about him. You could always rely on him to have your back, be strong when you knew that you couldn’t be. To see him afraid was different.

"Ben-" You try again.

"Please." His jaw clenches together. "Don't marry him. Come with me."

"What?" You blink a few times to comprehend what he's asking.

Is he saying that he wants me to marry him? To run away with him?

"You're worth a hundred of him and I don't want to do this without you."

"Ben you're asking me to give up my future, my life-" You say trying to strengthen your resolve.

As unwelcome as Howard's proposal was, it was a future of sorts, what Ben was asking you was to dive into the unknown and you weren't sure if you were strong enough to do that. To leave everything you knew behind you and go with him. But apart of you was thrilled. Maybe it meant that Ben cared for you, needed you and this was the only way that he knew how to tell you. The three little words jump to the tip of your tongue again, the words you wanted to say when you danced together under the twinkling lights all those nights ago.

"You mean the future your mother wants for you." Ben sighs.

"Ben-"

"You’ve been trying to please her your whole life. Please don’t do this for her. Don’t marry him for her." Ben says, trying to catch your gaze, but you look down at his chest for a minute.

"But-"

"You are worth more y/n. And even if she can’t see your worth I can."

"Ben-"  You look back up at him, trying to find the courage to tell him that you love him.

He stares back at you, green eyes wide and honest before he takes your hands. They're warm and rough, familiar in the best way. "Tell me that you want him. You’ve never lied to me before and I don’t think you’ll start now."

Your words die on your tongue, because you know that you can't lie to him, you never could.

"Is that really what you want? To spend the rest of your life with him? If it is I'll leave, but I want to hear you say it." His eyes are filled with promises that make your voice catch in your throat, like two blazing green fires that see through you. Ben might have acted aloof with other people, but he always paid attention to you and knew what you were thinking.  No one knew you as well as he did, well except for the most obvious thing.

No it's not what I want. All I want is to be with you. The thought is immediate.

"But what about my mother-" You say, squeezing his hands.

"If you come with me, you'll never have to worry about her ever again." He says. By now tears are trickling down your cheeks, frustration and confusion building in your chest. Ben was promising you a future with him, but you couldn't understand if he was doing it because he wanted to be more or if he wanted you with him because you were his friend.

He drops your hands and instead brushes away your tears from your eyes. "I know you don't want to marry him."

"I don't." You whisper. "But I don’t know if I'm strong enough for this-"

“Do you trust me?”

Your hands come up to the front of his chest before you can stop yourself, feeling the warmth that surges underneath your palms. “Of course I do.”

His eyes are inviting, pleading, filled with emotion. "I swear that I will be strong enough for the both of us." His hands cup your cheeks. "I swear that I will look out for you like I always have.  I swear that I will never leave you. And I don't want to leave you behind. Please y/n. Come with me." The earnest look in Ben's eyes makes you cry harder, but you know that all you want is to go with him.

You don't want him to go and leave you here, where no one understands and the future that you see is cold, emotionless, and the path dark. You see the coming years with Howard, living together, having children, lunching with other women you hardly know and talking about nothing that mattered.

When you were with Ben everything you talked about seemed important, every moment with him was fused with wonder and expectation, you were never disappointed and were always excited about what you would do together even if it was something as mundane as sitting on a bench with Ben talking while you painted. You could imagine spending the rest of your life with him.

But could he imagine the same thing with you?

The future you see with Ben is warm, inviting, filled with promises you know that he’ll keep because he’s never broken a promise to you no matter what.

But you wonder if it's the promise that you want.

You stand there in the silence of his plea, hearing the ticking of the clock on your bedside table, the sound of cars outside your window, and the sounds of the night vibrate through you bones.

He wasn’t saying that he loved you. He wasn’t confessing his love. He wasn’t making a promise to marry you.

But maybe this was his way. Ben had never been the best at expressing what he was feeling, but the look in his eyes, the way his fingers hold your face to his-

It spoke volumes.

“Yes.” You whisper. “I’ll come with you.”

Ben’s smile breaks your heart as he pulls you tightly against him, laying his head on top of yours as he hugs you and sets every nerve ending on fire. Because the hug is different. It’s filled with the unspoken words between you, the memories you’ve shared, and the great unknown that stretches beyond both of you.

And you cling tight to him, the only part of your future that’s certain.

Or so you thought.

********************************

a/n: I know, I know there's a lot of unresolved tension.😂 I promise it will all make sense and that it is going somewhere. But I will say the next few chapters are kinda... rough and are painful to write, but I can't wait for y'all to read them.

Thank you so much for reading! If you'd like to be added to the taglist for this series let me know :)

Taglist: @roseblue373 @anundyingfidelity @cheynovak @cassiecasluciluce @muhahaha303 @deans-spinster-witch @kayleighmeister @demodemo909 @fruitfacess @bobbobbobinogs @bughill126, @simplyfixated @sleepjam, @tiredstrangerr @freefallthoughts,@onlyangel-444

[animehideout]

LOVE IS THE MOST TWISTED CURSE OF THEM ALL

Part 9

Gojo Satoru x Fem! Reader

Part 10 here ✨🆕

Check out part 8 here if you missed it.

A/n: I'm back with another long chapter, grab a snack and a warm blanket and your headphones 🎧 . This story is ticking closer to its ending, i hope you enjoy this part as well 💖.

Your feedback is highly appreciated ✨🫶🏻.

Music suggestion ♪:

Dove Cameron - Boyfriend & The Weeknd - House Of Balloons.

W.c: 5.2k+ not proofread

Fuming with anger, his chest tightening. You and Nanami hadn’t notice him but he couldn’t take it anymore, he couldn’t bear to linger in your and Nanami’s presence a moment longer or he might not be able to control his shit. Hurriedly, he made his way through the dimly lit hallway to the bathroom, his steps heavy with frustration.

Once inside the bathroom, Gojo leaned over the sink, aggressively splashing cold water on his face attempting to repress the rising tide of his emotions. As the water flown on his face and chest, closing his eyes for the cold sensation to take him, your smile whenever you talked to your students, your laugh whenever Yuuji cracked a joke, the sparkle in your eyes whenever you explained new techniques and moves to your class, the hair strands falling on your face while you slept peacefully. But alongside those beautiful memories lingered the image of you and Nanami a few moments ago, your face inches away from each other as if you were gonna kiss, the way Nanami treated you with gentleness, with love and respect as if he’s your husband and not Gojo. A pang of envy ate him up from the inside. Also remembering how you and Nanami were so casually discussing how he had to kill his only bestfriend, it was too much to handle in only one night.

Clenching his fists, with a sudden burst of emotions, he slammed his hand against the wall, inches away from the mirror. The sharp sting of pain momentarily distracted him from his thoughts.

Alone, looking at his reflection in the mirror, struggling to make sense of the conflicting emotions that swirled within him.

“No it can’t be! I’m not jealous! I hate her…”

Longing, jealousy, deep-seated sense of inadequacy and emptiness. Being the strongest comes with a high cost; being lonely.

With a deep breath, after composing himself in the bathroom, Satoru splashed his face once more with water before turning to leave. As he exited, his mind still racing, he bumped into someone,

“Gojo? What a surprise!”

“Mei Mei?”

She stood before him with a sly, her eyes gleaming with mischief as she scanned his face. Trying her best to catch his attention with the lingerie she was wearing, seductively touching her neck.

“Couldn’t sleep Gojo?”

“Nah, just used the bathroom and now going back to my room”

“Why the rush? Fancy the change of scenery? I’m sure you’re sick of seeing Y/n beside you for the whole night?”

“Nah I’m good-” he replied coldly,

 he knew what she’s attempting to do, he’s aware of her feelings towards him but he clearly rejected them a long time ago but she doesn’t seem to get it, especially that it’s his fault to give her a chance to get close to him just to annoy Y/n. And now he regrets it.

But she was persistent, not planning to let go of him. As he walked pass her, she grabbed his arm and spoke,

“Come on Gojo, I thought we’re on the same team! Maybe I can distract you from what’s on your mind right now.. or Y/n is allowed to have fun with Nanami and you’re not ? let’s talk privately in my room, maybe I can help? We’re friends after all, aren’t we?” she smirked.

The thought of Y/n and Nanami together made his blood boil again, completely blinded by anger.

“Okay then, lead the way” he relented,

He knows that probably Nanami and his wife are not like what they seem, but his narcissism told him that he needs to take revenge. If his wife spends time with another man, he’ll spend time with another woman. Even though he’s the one who started this cycle in the first place. He knows its wrong, he can’t even stand Mei Mei, but for his own pride, he had to do it, even though you wouldn’t even see him with her but at least in front of himself. He wasn’t planning to do anything with Mei Mei, he was just there.

“Come in, so do you wanna drink something?”

“I’m good”

“Why do you keep pushing me away, I’m trying to help you know” she said taking off the part of the lingerie that was covering her shoulders. Now completely exposed, only in her laced silky lingerie as she took a seat on her bed.

Gojo sighed, knowing her intentions and the game she was playing. He was feeling extremely uncomfortable.

“You said you wanted to talk.. Go ahead”

“I see you’re rushing! Don’t tell me you already miss sleeping beside your wife, or let me guess! She’s not even there cuz she’s having a date with Nanami?”

“Mei Mei shut up” he said calmly.

“Why? Did it trigger you? Don’t tell me you caught feelings while she’s completely ignoring you for another man… I guess your plan to offend her didn’t work Gojo but rather made her happy to find Nanami”

“I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP” he yelled,

“NO I’M NOT GONNA SHUT UP, I’M NOT GONNA GIVE UP AND LET YOU FALL IN LOVE WITH HER”

“Do you hear yourself? What love are you talking about?”

“I know you have feeling s for Y/n Gojo! But as long as I’m in your life, I wouldn’t allow it to happen..” she paused crawling closer to him as he sat on the bed egde “You deserve someone like me Gojo, why can’t you give me a chance? Divorce with her!! Why would you wait for her curse to break, you know she’s useless either way”

“I won’t divorce her. I won’t give you a chance Mei Mei”

“You sure about that? Look at me, I have everything she doesn’t. You can do whatever you want with me, I offer you my body for tonight and for every night Gojo”

“NO! can’t you see that I don’t want you Mei Mei.. I’m not interested in touching you”

“I was the one who helped you Gojo to offend her and make her life a living hell, is this how you thank me by rejecting me?”

“I paid you for it, you’ve got the money what do you want more?”

“YOU! I LOVE YOU GOJO SATORU” she yelled, her hands reaching his private part to touch it but he slapped them away.

Without saying anything he walked towards the door to leave her room. He walked outside, but she followed him,

“Not so fast, you can’t just leave me like that-” she exclaimed desperately.

She grabbed his face and attempted to kiss him but before he could push her away, a voice spoke behind him,

“Satoru?” you said, your eyes widening.

You caught them in a very wrong time, Mei Mei was basically half naked, only in her laced lingerie that exposed her chest and barely covered her thighs and Gojo shirtless while their faces were close to each other and in front of her room. You couldn’t help but think that both of them half naked, did something very intimate; sex.

“Cheater” you mumbled and started walking away,

“Y/n wait” said Nanami, but you were already gone.

Gojo heart sank at your sight, your expressions a mixture of shock and betrayal. He watched helplessly as you turned away, your footsteps echoing in the silence that followed. It’s true he wanted revenge from the very beginning; he’s the one who asked for Mei Mei’s help. If he got caught in this situation at the beginning of your marriage he would be happiest but now? It made him more frustrated. He wanted to immediately run behind you, but he stopped himself. Why would he if both of you hate each other? You were with Nanami as well,  but he knew it wasn’t the same case. Mei Mei told you a lot of false information about her and Gojo being together and hooking up so seeing them both half naked could only mean one thing to you, that he fucked her and cheated on you.

“Fuck” he muttered under his breath.

Mei Mei smirked, seeing you like that made her happy and satisfied. Gojo rounded on her, his eyes narrowing with anger.

“You’re pathetic Mei Mei…. You’re living a false fantasy in your head and I pity you” he spat

“Aren’t you the same with Y/n? Living in your daydream about being with her while she’s out there with your colleague?” she spoke offensively.

His hands clenched into fists, his chest heavy with pent-up emotions. He was completely lost, he couldn’t understand why he felt his way, why it bothered him so much that he got caught. You were going to divorce anyway right? The realization of the consequences of his own actions hit him like a ton of bricks, but he can’t blame Mei Mei, the only one to blame is himself, he knew Mei Mei’s intentions from the beginning but he followed along, driven by his narcissism and ego, and now he’s silently paying for it.

“I don’t love you Mei Mei get that through your head, you took your money, now leave me alone-”

“You’ll regret that Gojo, you’ll regret breaking my heart”

“If there’s something to regret, is regretting involving you in the first place” he said through gritted teeth and then left.

“Don’t follow her Gojo, she clearly doesn’t wanna talk to you and she needs time now” said Nanami as Gojo walked past him.

“This will be my last warning Nanamin, stay away from my wife!” he threatened pointing his index finger at him.

“You dare to call her wife after cheating on her, your arrogance will end you someday Gojo Satoru”

“I. Didn’t. Cheat. On. Her”

“That��s not what it looks like…but you fucked up real bad”

“Mind your business” spat Satoru then left the his room.

….

You hesitated to knock on the door but you did eventually. Ain’t no way you’re spending the night with Gojo, you felt disgusted, and your heart was aching so much. Why would it hurt like this? Why would it affect you so much? You felt your inside organs sinking, as if someone got your heart in their hands and started squeezing it tightly making it bleed. Even though you were with Nanami, but both of you were respectful and didn’t cross the boundaries and most of all, fully dressed. Always eminding yourself that you’re a married woman and even if you don’t respect Gojo you still respect yourself and the others around you.  

“Y/n – sensei? Is everything okay?” said Maki as she opened the door.

Summoning your courage, you mustered the strength to voice your request,

“Could..could I spend the night here?” you asked.

“Of course sensei, come in please!”

Despite her sharp personality, Maki was always sweet and understanding towards you. She respects you a lot and over time both of you developed a good friendship even though she’s you’re student. She as well can’t stand Mei Mei and Satoru, so she knows well your struggle.

“Are you alright?” she asked worriedly,

“Mhm” you nodded

“You know if you wanna talk about it, I’m all ears!”

“You’re so sweet Maki! But I’m fine don’t worry I just don’t wanna spend the night with Satoru, you already know, haha the whole school knows that our marriage is fake so it’s kinda hard for both of us to share the room” you said trying to hide the truth that you actually caught your husband half naked with another woman.

“Is it Mei Mei? I know she always causes problems”

“Nah it has nothing to do with her” you reassured “Go back to sleep Maki, you have a long day tomorrow”

Maki moved a bit, giving you some space to lay there.

“Make yourself comfortable”  she smiled, giving you an extra blanket.

Anytime you closed your eyes, the sight of both of them creeped up in your mind, your eyes getting wet , you didn’t notice until that one single drop of tear fell on the pillow.

“No it can’t be…I hate him so much” you thought to yourself, trying to ease the heaviness you felt in your heart.

Finally, the sun rose. Announcing a new day. While Maki was asleep at night, you had a full conversation with yourself, giving yourself “the talk”. Convincing yourself that once you divorce him, things will get better and maybe you’ll meet the love of your life when you’re finally free from your curse and from him.

You headed to the common room with Maki to have breakfast, being with her while chatting about random things made your start of the day a lot better, you knew you’d find him there but you weren’t sure how to face him or repress that uncontrollable sting you felt. But your approach was to pretend, pretend as if you didn’t care, as if what happened yesterday was just a bad dream. You took a seat next to Nanami and Megumi and started munching on your food. Completely ignoring Gojo’s sad eyes that were looking your way and Mei Mei’s smirk that was directed to you. You actd as if both of them weren’t there. You enjoyed your breakfast, chitchatting with Nanami, he was as equally confused as Gojo. Didn’t you get pissed yesterday, how did you control your emotions in one night, how strong could you be. But Nanami was happy that you were doing alright, a cheater is definitely not worthy of your tears. Gojo tightened his grip around his cup, excusing himself from the table, barely finishing his food.

You spent your day teaching as usual, but having extra fun and laughing extra hard. To others it seemed real but inside it was nothing but a pretend. Laughing to not give a chance to your sorrow to take over you. Laughing and being a social butterfly, joking around with your students just to hide how empty you were feeling from the inside. The void inside of you got more bigger, and it requires more efforts to conceal it. You’ve got this, you’ve been dealing with emptiness and disappointment since a very young age, but as you got older you learned how to hide it but let it break you when you’re completely alone.

You watched as your students were gathered in the school field, chatting and having fun, a smile tugged on the corners of your mouth, having friends and enjoying your teenage years is something you never experienced but it made you happy to see others enjoy it; cousins and siblings, sharing inside jokes and discussing events that happened at school , gossiping about teachers while you sat in a corner, forced by your parents to sit with them, just so you don’t lose your social skills of being at home for your whole life. Funny how they were scared that you might lose your social skills while you already lost yourself.

And now it’s repeating itself, you’re watching your students laugh together and enjoy their time. But it’s never too late to have. You walked towards them, yes, you’ll join them and act as if you were a student, for once you wanted to experience that.

“Hey guys, watcha doing?” you said with a smile.

“Oh Sensei! We were just having fun” exclaimed Yuuji excitedly,

“Oh , mind if I join?” you asked

“You’re always welcome in the friend group sensei” said Nobara

You sat with them, joining in the fun, carrying the conversation with them. Maybe you had nothing positive out of this new life, out of this marriage but at least now you have friends; Nanami, Maki, Yujii and the other students. Funny how these young students are way mature and respectful than Gojo and Mei Mei. Proof that power isn’t everything if you can’t be a decent human being.

As you were laughing at one of Panda’s jokes, you were taken aback from a deep voice that filled the space and got you al mute instantly.

“You brats are so loud, wonder how Y/N is bearing you”

You kept looking for the voice, when Yuji slapped his face.

“Eeh apologies sensei, he likes to intervene in the most unexpected times”

“Huh?” you looked at Yuuji and you saw a mouth popping up on his cheek.

“What is that?” you asked again

“That? Tch I’m Ryomen Sukuna the king of curses”

It was the first time you see him, or only his mouth. You knew Yuuji was the vessel but you didn’t know that he could show up like that. Suddenly, tattoos started appearing on Yuuji’s face.

“Oh this can’t be any good” muttered Megumi.

You looked in disbelief, the jujutsu world is full of surprises. Scary but interesting.

“Now kids excuse us, I need to talk with Y/N alone” said Sukuna making you furrow your brows.

All of them stood their ground, ready to exorcise him if he ever touched you. You heart warmed at how they were considerate and protective over you but it made you feel weak. A teacher is the one supposed to protect the studenst and not opposite.

“I won’t let you hurt Y/n-sensei” said Megumi

“That’s okay guys! I’ll be fine” you smiled towards them “Go back to your classes, I’ll join you later”

Well you weren’t sure if you’ll join them later or not, given that Ryomen Sukuna is standing in front of you and he could snap you in half before even trying to take your last breath. But you wanted to face a real danger, you’ve never seen a curse and you had the honor to see the king of curses.

Sukuna looked at you with his red eyes and a playful smirk drawn on his face.

“So you’re the rumored to surpass me?” he started

“E-excuse me?” you said in confusion, how would you surpass the king of curses.

“Oh yeah I remember, they’re hiding a lot of things from you, a lot of information from you….but I’m not one to spoil the fun but rather run with the flow if I like it of course…so imma just say, I can’t wait for you curse to break.”

“What are you talking about? What info? And why would you wait for my curse to break?”

“To finally have the legendary duel that everyone is waiting for, including your husband”

You froze in place, as fear crept into your bones like a chill.

“There must be a mistake, what duel? I’m not even a sorcerer”

“You will be! You don’t know your potential yet, surprised that that brat Gojo Satoru hasn’t told you, he likes to spoil everything”

“So is this an indirect way to say that you can’t wait to kill me?”

“Something like that yeah”

“oh wow wonderful” you chuckled nervously, as your hands started sweating.

What a way to finish your day, by getting threatened by the king of curses himself.

As you were talking, Mei Mei interrupted you. You rolled your eyes, being threatened by Sukuna is way better than seeing her face. But you had to act cool.

“Oh look who’s here” she begun “The famous Ryomen Sukuna”

“Isn’t she scared that he might kill her?” you thought to yourself.

“I’m having a private conversation so get out of here” he spat ruthlessly

“Oh don’t worry, I have no intention in fighting you Sukuna just wanted to check up on my friend”

“Talking as if you stand a chance against me in a fight, so don’t make me say it again, piss off NOW”

“Alright, but I see that Y/n is having fun, surrounding yourself by men! Married to Gojo, hooking up with Nanami and now hitting on Ryomen Sukuna… not only a gold and power digger but also a curse digger…. Now I see why Gojo chose me- because you’re a slut”

You couldn’t take it anymore, so you slapped her as hard as you could, you hand connected with her cheek in a sharp crack. The force of the slap sent a shockwave through Mei Mei’s body, her head snapping to the side with the impact. For a moment, time seemed to stand still as she registered the sting of pain radiating from her cheek, a burning sensation that pulsed with each rapid heartbeat. As she found your eyes, she was met with a fury gaze that burned holes through her. She’s been provoking you and pushing you to the brink for days now, and you finally snapped.

Sukuna watched with amusement, you didn’t disappoint even though you’ve got 0 cursed energy. He knew you were different from the day you succeeded in landing a punch on the famous Gojo Satoru, he’s formidable enemy. But know he’s no longer interested in Gojo, his new target is you.

Mei Mei took a step closer to you but Sukuna stood in front of you,

“You dare to lay a finger on her and I’ll chop you into pieces” he threatened, his red eyes glowing .

“I know you won’t, you have a pact with Yuji and you can’t break it”

“Who said I can’t? know your place fool, I’m the king of curses”

“Ahh” she laughed in disbelief.

“Are you thick in the head or what? I SAID PISS OFF BITCH”

Mei Mei left both of you alone, walking away like a loser she is. You looked at Sukuna, he was threatening you a few minutes ago and now defending you?

“Why’d you do that? Defend me? I thought you wanted to kill me?”

“Because you’re reserved for me, no one can harm my future opponent, gotta keep you safe fpr now so I can enjoy fighting you later” he smirked.

You glared at him,

“So I’m supposed to thank you?”

“Nah you’re supposed to find out why your curse didn’t break yet, aren’t you curious?”

You were indeed curious but you had nothing you could do except waiting, you married Satoru and that’s the ultimate thing you could do. After making your vows that bond was automatically created, you knew breaking the curse takes time, but it took longer than you expected, but what can you do except waiting? So you avoided it and just let this invisible bond do its thing. Now after meeting Sukuna you were questioning if you truly wanted to become a sorcerer, since you’ll probably get killed by him.

“I’m not” you simply said and left.

“We’ll meet again Y/n, so better count your days” he teased, his devilish laughed echoeing in your ears.

…..

“Sensei are you alright?” asked Maki

“Yeah I’m fine, just had a small talk with Sukuna” you reassured them

“SENSEI” yelled Yuuji as he ran towards you.

“Yuuji-kun?”

“I’m sorry Sensei I couldn’t stop him from swapping…I’m sorry if he scared you” explained Yuuji with an apologetic expression, as he engulfed you in a hug.

“Aw, you’re the sweetest Yuuji! But no need to worry about me, I’m really fine” you smiledwidely, patting his head.

“I’m glad you’re okay!”

“Now go on to your dorms, it’s getting late”

….

You closed your room’s door, taking a heavy breath as you started changing into your pyjamas,

“And I thought my life wouldn’t get any worse”

Settling on your bed, you didn’t want to spend the night with Satoru but you had no option. You can’t spend the rest of your life in Maki’s room. As you were trying to calm yourself down from the storm that raged inside you, your stomach twisting, expecting Gojo to show up at any given moment, you grabbed your book, flipping the pages. You couldn’t concentrate or keep your focus on anything, your thoughts scrambled, too many threats, too many problems and it was already a success that you didn’t lose your shit yet. Trying your best to stay composed and to not go completely crazy on anyone who tries to talk to you.

As your eyes focused on the page in front you, words not making any sense, the door creaked open, shattering your desperate attempt of having a peaceful night. Your heart leaped into your throat, you knew he’ll join you eventually, but forseeing it didn’t make you any prepared. A wave of panic washed over you, feeling as if you were going to puke from how anxious you were. You averted your gaze back to your book, avoiding him even though you felt his eyes boring into you. You didn’t know the reason behind his intense looks and you weren’t ready to find out as well. Your jaw clenched tight as you tried to keep your emotions in check, your silence already spoke volumes.

He grabbed a t-shirt and one of his sweatpants from his wardrobe and started changing, you weren’t phased by him changing in front of you, you were actually ignoring his existence. He knew you were done with him when you didn’t yell at him for changing in front of you, for not even being bothered by his appearance. You were boiling inside, but you kept a poker face. And it broke him into pieces, it have made him loads better if you screamed and yelled at him, if you voiced your anger like you usually do, but your silence scared him for the very first time and he thought it was the end.

He joined you in bed. By his body language you could tell he was preparing to say something. He cleared his throat, hesitant to say anything, but he had to keep that cool and confident image.

“Hey about last night, just so you know I didn’t cheat on you- it’s not like what it seemed, we di-”

“I don’t wanna hear anything, I don’t wanna even hear your voice Satoru” you said coldly

“I’m not dying to express myself but I don’t like it when someone msiun-”

“THEN SHUT UP” you snapped out of frustration

“W-what?”

“Idon’t wanna hear any more lies Satoru, you can fuck her as much as you want you, it’s not phasing me at all”

“Then why did it bother you like that to the point that ran away-”

“Because I’m disgusted of you” you said through gritted teeth throwing away your book on the floor

He didn’t say anything, but looked at you with wide eyes as you threw a tantrum.

“Why’d you insist that I’m a cheater huh? Because I’m not! She pushed herself on me! It was just a wrong timing”

“I.Don’t.Care!” you said as you left the bed

“Yeah clearly, you don’t care about anyone except yourself” now he started attacking you,

“WHAT?”

He took a step closer to you, his hand grabbing your wrist forcefully, pulling you towards him,

“I said you only care about yourself! You see what you want to see, you understand what you want to understand, you don’t even try to connect with people on a deeper level because you’re empty and you hate it, because you know once they get to know you they’ll find nothing from the inside”

He did strike a sensitive nerve, and hit a sensitive spot in you, using your trauma against you is a terrible thing to do, such a cowardice. It’s like voicing his own trauma but using it to insult you.

“You don’t have any right to say this, you don’t even know me!”

“And you don’t have any right to call me a cheater, you don’t even know me!”

“All I know is that you’re broken, alone and desperate…hiding behind power but the night exposes you, you nightmares humble you-”

“If you say any other word, you’ll regret it Y/N”

“Yeah threaten me all you like, I’m going to die anyway” you said the last sentence as a whisper but he heard it.

It pissed him off, how you caught all vulnerable, he hated to admit how his nightmares scared him, how they haunted him for years but you simply used them against him. He took a step closer to you,

“I pity you Y/n, you dare to speak nonsense because your entire life is nonsense itself.. Yeah that must be hard for you, being ignored by your parents and family, of course you’d grow up to become a disappointment, a failure. You failed your family and now you’re failing everyone around you in Jujutsu high..” he spoke,

His words like daggers that were thrown directly at your chest, you wanted to fight him back but deep down you knew every word he said was true. Your family didn’t even call to check up on you since the day you got married, as if you were a burden and finally got rid of it. They didn’t even believe that your curse would break, they had a bit of hope that Gojo would do something but definitely not you. 

You stared at him, with a smile that hid your sadness , you grabbed your jacket, and left. Closing the door behind you. He didn’t mean any word he said, he was just driven by jealousy, and you saying that him and Mei Mei didn’t bother you drove him crazy, making him think that you don’t have any feelings towards him and that you want Nanami instead.

*Timeskip to the morning*

As the morning light filtered through the big window, casting a warm glow over the breakfast table, Gojo took his seat, ignoring Mei Mei who was trying hard to get his attention. As the minutes ticked by, your absence became increasingly conspicuous, concerned whispers filled the room.

“Where’s your wife?” asked principal Yaga

Satoru’s brow furrowed in confusion,

“I thought she was here…maybe she’s in the bathroom or something” he replied, shoving food inside his mouth.

“I was in the bathroom, and she wasn’t there” said Maki

A sense of panic rippled through the group, Nanami quickly stood up from his chair and started searching in the whole school, but you were nowhere to be found. Followed by your students, principal Yaga and now Gojo whose heart started pounding as he looked for you everywhere. Only Mei Mei calmly sitting still, enjoying her food.

Once again gathered in the common room, after their failed attempt to find you, they called you multiple times but failed to reach you.

“Did something happened between you two?” asked Principal Yaga, his voice cutting through the chaos.

Satoru swallowed hard, the weight of his guilt settling heavily upon his shoulders,

“We-we had an argument last night….” He admitted “she left the room and I thought she was just going to the balcony or something…I didn’t realize she had left”

“SHE WAS YOUR FUCKING RESPONSIBILTY SATORU!!” yelled Yaga sensei

“Sensei I truly didn’t know!”

“You know that there’s a murderer on the loose that’s targeting her and you didn’t care ..”

“Wait what?” asked the students in union since they didn’t know about Toji’s plan to murder you.

“Instead of protecting her what the fuck where you doing?” asker principal Yaga once again

“He was with me!” said Mei Mei taking the last bite of her toast “Gojo was with me” she repeated

“If you dare to throw any other lie Mei Mei I swear to God I’ll kill you” threatened Gojo walking towards her but Nanami stopped him.

“Don’t blame others for your own mistakes Gojo “ she said offensively

As they were fighting, trying to have a plan on how to find you, Gojo received a text on his phone, that got his eyes widen in fear,

[Gojo Satoru, I wanted to inform you that your wife is with me, I don’t think you care that much , but so you can save yourself and energy from the hassle of searching that the higher ups would put you through – Toji Fushiguro]

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[devilfic]

❝right place, right time❞

vignette. strawberry candies.

parts: previously / next plot: while at your place, you discover that someone has hurt judith. you turn to the only person who can help. pairing: battinson!bruce wayne x gn!reader. cw: surgeon!reader, secret identities, slow burn, mostly bruce-centric, fluff, a bit of angst, bruce dealing with kids, mention of guns (no shooting), mentions of alcohol and smoking, bruce will get on this old lady's good side if it kills him. words: 3.2k. a/n: while outlining the next chapter, I thought up a sweet little filler chapter that takes place all in one day before and during the events of chapter 9. warning for the POV change after the first scene.

"Judith, what happened to you?"

The old lady feels your thumb brush the bandage above her eye and closes her fingers around your wrist, dragging it away, "It's nothing. It's nothing."

"Hell if it is," you rush her inside your apartment, shutting the two cops out with a kick to the door. You lead Judith to your couch, sitting her down as you kneel before her. Other than the bandage on her eye, she looks the same except for something small. You've noticed her nervous shakes before, never peculiar, but they were hard to ignore today. They rock in her lap as she keeps them folded, "Did you fall?"

She looks insulted at that, kisses her teeth at you for it. She'd had very few falls in the past, as sturdy and stubborn as a bull. But even as you examine her demeanor, you know it isn't that. Uneasiness sets in your chest. "No, I... I ran into some boys on my way home from church. That's all."

Your uneasiness begins to bubble into wrath, "Who?"

"It doesn't matter, child."

"Judith, I'm serious." Her eyes bore into yours, trying to show herself immovable, but you can feel yourself begin to tremble at the thought that Dimitri might have-

"It was some kids on the corner." She finally relents, looking away from you. "They wanted my purse, that's all."

"The corner where? By the liquor store?" Her eyes cut away from yours, guiltily, "Judith, what were you doing walking that far? You never get off the bus that early."

It was why she started taking the bus in the first place. People lingered on the streets that late, waiting for any easy target to snatch from or snatch up. With the rise in dropheads, people would take whatever money they could get, however they could get it.

The men on the corner usually kept to themselves though, nursing paper bag bottles and hiding out from the rain underneath the overpass. They usually cast a sneer and let you keep on walking if you ever found yourself around their side of town. You'd never gotten close enough for them to want to attack.

Judith frowns, "I missed it. I thought I'd walk."

"What did I tell you about walking home alone? If you have to, you call me, or you call one of the deacons, or a cab-"

"I did call you," Judith snaps, making your blood run cold, "and you didn't answer. So I called again. And then I figured you were busy or working late, so I walked on home. I'm old but I'm not senile."

Your frown deepens, "I didn't mean it that way."

"I even came to your door and you weren't there. So I handled it myself."

"You were right. I was working late." Your fingers brush your pocket where your phone lies dead, "I'm sorry I wasn't there."

Proud as she is, she doesn't look you in the eye, but you feel some of her anger melt away over time. Her hand finds yours and squeezes it, "It's not your fault. It's mine. I should've known better."

You want to bite your lip until it floods your mouth with blood. You couldn't imagine what might have happened if she'd been hurt worse, left to fend for herself in the dark. If they'd been angry, looking for someone to take it out on, and she'd been in the wrong place...

And Judith with all her pride. You can tell she barely wanted to talk about it, had hoped you might not notice. "Listen, Judith," you begin, feeling her watching you from her peripheral, "I'm not gonna be around for a while. I won't be far, I'll still be in the city, but I won't be... here."

"You're finally getting a real place?"

You laugh, "Sort of. It's temporary. Look, I won't be right here anymore so I need you to take care of yourself. I'll come running if you need me but-"

You're silenced by her two, chilly hands cupping your cheeks in between them. Stern as ever, Judith fixes you with a strong look, "I'll be okay. Don't you worry."

"You sure? I don't wanna have to call the nursing home on you."

One of Judith's hands takes your cheek into a pinch and pulls, hard, "I said I'll be fine." Despite the pain, you smile all lopsided at her and she eventually releases you.

You make her tea, but all the while your eyes keep finding the white gauze above her eye, itching and itching at you until you think you might scratch yourself raw. You couldn't let this one go.

This feels decidedly more sinister, posing on an old lady's fire escape instead of yours. Bruce can see through the lace covering the window that Judith is still up, putting on a pot of tea, and he hesitates in knocking on the glass. He couldn't exactly walk through the front door, and if he came in through the rooftop, he'd risk being seen by neighbors in the hall. This was the only way, and it just might scare the living shit out of this woman.

Gently, he curls his fingers in and knocks.

Judith does not move from the stove. He knocks again, a little louder this time. Still, no reaction. He's seconds from asking you to call Judith to get her attention, looking away for just a second, when his eyes drift back to the window and there she is.

She's got a cast-iron skillet up above her head and the meanest mug he's seen this side of the east coast. It could put Penguin to shame.

They both stare at each other for a while.

When Bruce makes no move to leave, Judith yells through the window, "Go away, demon!"

Bruce had never gotten to know his grandparents on account of them all being dead. There was no old woman at Christmastime to spoil him with gifts and candies, no lovingly crafted wrinkles and sweet smelling perfume to remember a grandmother by. He had never been the type of person to walk old ladies across the street, either. He knew his place.

There was no way to make himself small enough for her to not see as a threat, and so they each watch the other, waiting for them to make a move. He certainly wouldn't be first.

After a good few (painstaking) minutes, she points the pan at the window and asks, "What do you want?"

"A friend sent me."

Her brows furrow, and then an even deeper frown overtakes her face (if that was even possible). "I don't want your help."

"Our friend is worried about you. And worried about anyone else those guys on the corner might hurt."

"Leave or I'll call the police!"

Bruce considers his options. On the one hand, she might call and they might show and think that he'd just scared the woman creeping by her window. He'd get a slap on the wrist and a reminder to take the roofs next time. On the other, he might get a trigger-happy recruit who'd need disarming and a detective who'd need explaining.

He figures he might take his chances with this one, if only to be a true glutton for punishment, "What did it look like?" Her eyes narrow in confusion, "Your purse. What did it look like?"

"I said I don't want your help."

Bruce hides a grumble in his throat. He has half the mind to just leave. He'd take the verbal lashing from you if it meant ending this conversation sooner.

But there would be a million more grumpy old ladies, and he'd be no better at talking to them then. "You used to keep a lighter in there. It was your husband's." Judith stills. Bruce feels himself getting a bit more confident, recalling what you'd told him, "He always kept it on him. I can get it back for you."

She doesn't say anything for a while, still holding her pan at arm's length. He feels a bit silly talking at her through the window, curtains still partially drawn, and he doesn't suppose he looks any cuddlier shrouded in shadow. But all she does is stare at him.

Bruce feels more elated than he expects to when the pan lowers.

"I doubt you'll find it," she starts, and he can almost barely hear the next part through the glass, "it was silver with our initials engraved on it. C and J."

Judith is looking away when she says it. It feels as good a time as any to get going, but he lingers there until she's looking at him before making his escape. He'd like her to know he heard.

It's not hard to find them.

A group of about five men are standing on the corner, all of them just as you'd described. They look inebriated enough to not even stand straight, and Bruce wonders how they'd had the brainpower to handle a woman like Judith just walking by.

Bruce hangs in the shadows, perched on a ledge above them as a train rumbles by above his head. One of the men flicks open a light to light his cigarette, and Bruce's eyes zero in on it. He can't see initials from this far, but its silver glints under the streetlight just so. It's enough to go off on.

Bruce drops from his ledge, catching only one of the men's attention as he lazily turns his head over his shoulder at the sound. He's slow to recognize him, but quick to gather close to his friends on the brick wall, "Fuck!" He shouts, slurring a bit, "Let's get out of here!"

The one furthest from him starts to run, but Bruce's grapple gun wraps around his legs and yanks him onto his back, dragging him further into the alley and closer to him. The others look loyal enough not to run off without him, but their fighting stances are weakened by their stumbling.

"Fuck you man, we didn't do anything." One argues, raised fists wobbling in front of his face.

"Yeah!" The others chime in.

The one held captive at Bruce's feet is whimpering and clawing at the wire digging into his ankles, pulling at it to no avail. Bruce places a boot on his chest and forces him back down, "I hear you've been stealing from old ladies."

"What? No way, man. We don't do that shit."

Bruce digs the heel of his boot into the space between his ribs, feeling him squirm in anguish, "Last night you did. You took her purse. Where is it?"

"I'm telling you, we didn't do that shit. We... we weren't even here last night." The man under his boot is pushing at it, desperate to get away. Bruce has the sinking feeling as he watches him, like a rat with his tail caught in a trap, that he's telling the truth.

"We're not the only ones who hang out on this corner, we swear," one of the bigger members of the group pipes up, looking worried for his friend, "some assholes beat us here yesterday. We hung out by the docks instead. Honest."

Another chimes in, "Yeah. Ask boss inside. He lets us hang all the time. He knows we weren't here last night." He gestures toward the liquor store and Bruce watches them for a moment longer, eyes probing. They had every reason to lie: they were all drunk off their asses, and his reputation preceded him. Even with the five of them, he'd have it handled.

But that sinking feeling comes back.

Bruce gives it a little bit before he finally takes his foot off the man's chest, and he watches him scramble to his feet, running back to his pack. Before they can run to safety, Bruce grabs the one with the lighter and snatches it from his grip, checking the sides. All silver, no initials. He tosses it back with just as much kindness.

"You know who they are?" Bruce asks, holding him by the scruff.

"You gotta promise not to rat boss out," he stutters, looking back at the store, "he knows the guys. One of 'em's his nephew."

A flash of irritation rushes down Bruce's spine. These things were never easy.

Bruce catches the store owner on his smoke break, seconds from lighting a cigarette before he makes himself known. The store owner shrinks back, and before Bruce can even ask, his voice comes out in a tremble, "Where is he?"

Bruce gets the feeling it would be better to say nothing.

When he doesn't answer, the store owner starts to beg, inching closer to him even as his expression contorts in fear, "You didn't hurt him, did you? He's just a kid!"

"Your nephew is the one hurting people."

The owner winces, but doesn't refute it. "Please tell me you didn't hurt him."

"Not yet," Bruce sidesteps the man, circling him in the low light, "and I won't if he stops robbing old ladies."

"He'll stop. I promise. I'll handle it."

"You knew what he was doing and you didn't stop him before."

"I... I've tried, okay? He doesn't listen-"

Bruce grabs the man's shirt and shoves into the side of a dumpster, the sound reverberating through the near-midnight air as he stares down at him. His name tag reads "Brian", and the sweat that slicks his brow is starting to coat the collar of his shirt. "Where is he now?"

A click sounds from behind his head. Bruce doesn't turn at first, but he already knows what's pointing at him from behind.

There's a kid there, no older than 17, holding a gun to the back of Bruce's head. He trembles like his uncle, "Let him go."

Being held at gunpoint doesn't get any less frightening, even if it happens to you every night.

There's still this primal urge clawing under Bruce's skin to duck and hide, something he shakes off the second he grabs the gun and forces it out of the kid's hand. The thing clatters to the ground and he kicks it away not a moment later, taking the teenager and shoving him into his uncle's arms. Bruce almost feels sick at the scared look on his face. As if he hadn't been the one about to pull the trigger.

Bruce leans down to pick up the gun and goes to unload the chamber, but there's nothing. His gaze coasts back up to the kid's and he feels his stomach churn at the sight, the thought. This kid had seen Bruce and still thought, even if it was a long shot...

Bruce holds the thing by the barrel, "You know how to use that thing?"

"Yes!" But Bruce doesn't believe him.

"Not loaded, but it's enough to scare old ladies, isn't it?"

The kid forces himself to look tough and mean, falling flat to Bruce regardless, "How the fuck would you know?"

"Her purse. Where is it?"

"What? What are you talking-"

"If you don't have it, your friends do. Do you want me to look for them too?"

A flash of fear. The kid hardens his expression but he's too late, "There wasn't even anything in it."

Bruce glances at Brian. He hasn't taken his eyes off him. He looks as if he'll jump between any blow he might throw at the kid. His eyes glide back to the kid's and he forces his voice to soften, "There was a lighter in it. Engraved. She wants it back."

Recognition replaces the fear. The kid is hesitant to move or say anything at first, but when his uncle places a hand on his shoulder, it's enough to push him forward. He swallows down his pride for just a moment, "It's in the store. Upstairs in my room. I... we spent the cash already but all the other stuff's in there."

Bruce stares at him, and without another word, the kid runs back into the store. Bruce listens for the sound of feet pounding against the staircase to make sure he wouldn't try to book it, but he returns just as quickly as he'd left, shoving the purse into Bruce's hands as if he couldn't wait to be rid of it.

A quick ruffle around in it reveals the lighter and a pocket Bible, among strawberry candies and pens. True to his word, the wallet looks and feels empty.

He wants to leave it at that.

But one more look at the kid and Brian and he's shoving the empty gun into Brian's chest, gritting through his teeth, "You clearly love him. Don't let him do something he'll regret."

Brian goes rigid. Fixes his jaw tight. He says nothing in response, but it's enough.

He'd meant to leave it at the window, but Bruce is surprised to find Judith still awake in her recliner, fingers twiddling with another copy of the Bible. No wonder she only mentioned the lighter.

Bruce knocks and Judith does jump this time, genuinely surprised. He holds the purse up and she moves as quickly as she can, prying open the window a crack. Just enough for him to slip it in.

He's careful as he slides it through and she snatches it from his grasp, digging through it until her fingers grasp the lighter. Bruce takes advantage of the opening to speak to her, quieter this time, "The cash is gone, but they didn't touch anything else."

She says nothing. She holds the lighter in her hands and it shakes, her lip trembling just so. Bruce feels his chest swell with nervous feeling. Three years of this and he was as if a novice all over again.

He's about to leave when he feels a hand tugging on the bottom of his cape and when he turns, he sees the window propped wide open and Judith's hand fixed into the material of it. She isn't crying but she's misty-eyed, holding onto him with all her strength. He forces himself still. He awaits a "thank you" or even a firm nod of approval, but in her other hand, she holds out a candy. One of the strawberry candies. His brows furrow. He can't make out where it's from, but he knows he can't refuse.

He plucks the candy from her palm and tucks it into his utility belt. Judith releases him, saying nothing more, but as he begins his descent down the fire escape, he feels her eyes watch him all the way down.

You stare at the candy in wonder, eyes twinkling. Bruce cannot understand why you're so excited, "This familiar to you?"

"You've been given the Judith seal of approval, just one step down from getting invited over for tea." Bruce frowns. "Oh, come on. Don't tell me you've never had one of these before. Everyone's grandma has 'em."

"I didn't know my grandmother."

Your eyes soften, chuckling nervously, "Ah, well. To be fair, your grandmother was in another tax bracket. She probably would've given you... I don't know, gold-flaked truffles."

Bruce narrows his eyes at you, though a smile creeps up not far behind, "Colorful imagination. Is that what you want for dessert tomorrow night?"

"Don't you fucking dare."

[jagibee]

Call Me Luna

(Stray Kids x Reader)

Chapter 9

4,843 Words

A/N: A bit of a filler chapter, but I hope y’all enjoy!

TW: Casual discussion of sex, butt patting shenanigans, slightly suggestive make out scene

…

“‘“What’s up, party people?”’”

“For fuck’s sake, Han Jisung!” Hyunjin startled, lifting his head off your shoulder and glaring at the beta as he stepped into the studio. “We are trying to have a moment and you come in here screaming? It’s hard enough already with a sweaty Changbin in the corner.”

“Yah!”

Innie choked on a cracker as he cackled and you handed him his water as Jisung squatted behind him and wrapped his arms around the younger alpha. “I think sweaty Changbins actually make moments all the more special. There are people all over the world trying to have moments with their loved ones but they don’t have a sweaty Changbin setting the mood, so their efforts are futile.”

You glanced over at Changbin to see him rising from the floor with a smirk. Quicker than you would have expected, he launched himself over to Jisung, throwing himself at the beta and pinning him down to the floor. Changbin’s knees were on either side of Jisung’s waist while his elbows were resting by the younger boy’s ears. The entirety of Jisung’s face was being enveloped by Changbin’s chest as the alpha puffed it out, pressing his weight into the floor and sandwiching Jisung.

“How do you like my sweat now, Hannie? Is this a special enough moment for you? Are you getting choked up by my sweat?”

“I’m getting choked up by your stench! Hyung! Let me go, you barbarian!”

Next to you, Hyunjin was watching the two with a bored expression and Jeongin’s eyes were crinkled in amusement as he shoved his last cracker in his mouth.

Suddenly, Changbin yelped loudly and rolled off of Han in the direction of the couch, clutching his left pec.

A few feet away, Minho set down his water bottle and uncrossed his legs. He sighed and leaned forward over Changbin. “What happened?”

Jisung scuttled over Changbin and made his way to the couch, where he took up residence under Minho’s arm. “I bit him,” he declared, a proud smile lighting up his face.

“On the tit?” Hyunjin questioned, raising his eyebrows.

Jisung scoffed. “Of course it was on the tit, it was the only place my mouth could reach.” He pushed himself closer to Minho like he was trying to merge their bodies together. “It was his fault, really. I was complimenting him and he practically suffocated me. I was just being fair.”

Minho brushed his lips along Jisung’s forehead. “Of course you were, jagi. How was your vocal lesson?”

Han hummed. “It was fine. I drank some nasty restorative tea, I learned some new exercises. Sang a song. Now, I’m hungry.”

Changbin sat up from where he had been rolling around, still clutching his chest. “Well, I would have offered you some of my barbecue chips, but you chose violence so now I’m going to eat them in front of you and watch you starve.”

Jisung’s eyes widened. “The good barbecue chips? From the vending machine on the fourth floor?”

At Changbin’s nod, Jisung turned a betrayed face towards Minho. “Hyung! You let them have a snack break, took them to the good vending machines, and you didn’t even get me anything?”

Minho rolled his eyes. “I didn’t do any of that. Jinnie and Y/N came here a few minutes ago when they finished talking and brought snacks for the three of us. I’m sure that if they knew you were coming, they would have brought you something as well. For now, I have a protein bar in my bag, and when someone goes up to get Channie-hyung and the others in a few minutes, you can go too and stop by the good vending machines on the way. Okay?”

Jisung’s eyes sparkled as he looked at Minho. “Okay, hyung. Thank you!” He swooped in and pressed a chaste kiss to the side of Minho’s neck before bouncing over to a duffel bag on the other side of the room and rifling through it.

You smiled at Minho as Changbin rolled over to Hyunjin and demanded a kiss on his chest to heal it. “Wow, do they even need a caretaker when they have you?”

He kept his eyes on Jisung as he answered you. “Well, somebody has had to keep these lemmings alive before you got here. Yah!” he shouted at Jisung, “Don’t forget we’re going out to dinner later, only one bar and then the barbecue chips.”

Jisung walked back over, holding an unwrapped protein bar in his hand and took his previous place under Minho’s arm. His left cheek was stuffed with the bite he had taken, but he paused in his chewing to speak. “You know, lemmings don’t actually commit mass suicide. That’s a myth that Disney came up with for some reason during the 1950s.”

Jeongin butted in. “Maybe he was just calling you a lemming because you’re a rodent.”

Jisung gasped and promptly choked on his protein bar. Between coughs, he specified, “Hyung said lemmings, as in more than one, my fellow rodent!”

Jeongin scoffed. “Please. I’m the one person in this group that can take care of themselves and hyung knows it. That’s why I’m his favorite,” he added with a smug smile. “But also, I’m a fox. I eat rodents for breakfast.”

Hyunjin’s head popped up from where he had been trying to escape his own less intense Changbin chest smothering. “Can I be a rodent? Innie can eat me for breakfast!”

Jisung’s nose wrinkled. “Gross.”

“That’s not what you said when literally this morning-”

“Jin-ah!” Minho barked. “I know that you are all happy that you can talk about your sex lives freely in front of Y/N, but that does not mean that she is happy to hear the dirty details. Also, we all know how the bickering between you two ends, and we don’t have time for any rendezvouses before dinner.”

Um, Y/N would actually be very happy to hear the dirty details, and also she could definitely clear up some time on her schedule if you wanted to ‘rendezvous’.

You were quite glad that no secondary gender presentation came with mind-reading capabilities. The last thing you needed was to be fired for sexual harassment.

It was a bit weird to have horny thoughts for your clients. Your previous employers were more family-focused packs, where you spent most of the time babysitting the kids, while this was a pack of stunning, mega-talented men who were all in a relationship with each other.

And wasn’t there some kind of ethical boundary? You had heard several stories of caretakers becoming pack members of their clients, it was fairly natural to become close with people who you knew everything about. However, this felt different. This was a globally famous band whose members already dealt with crazy fans and antis and saesangs, and they didn’t need another crazy person right under their noses, especially not one who knew all of their personal business.

It’s just a few celebrity crushes, you told yourself. Once I get to know them more in-person, the feelings will fade away.

It didn’t seem likely, but you held on to that theory with both hands.

Suddenly, an alarm went off, pulling you from your thoughts and making Jeongin and Hyunjin jump on either side of you. Minho reached over with the arm not pinned down by Jisung, and grabbed his phone.

“Okay, time for one more run-through before we get the others and head home to get ready for dinner.”

The boys groaned but got up anyway, Jisung and Hyunjin complaining when Minho forced them to practice as well, saying that they weren’t even supposed to be there. “Well, then don’t go to places you aren’t supposed to go,” he responded, giving them each a pat on the butt.

As they moved into the beginning formation, you moved to gather up the snack wrappers and throw them away, except for the half-full bag of barbecue chips which you set next to you as you settled back on the couch to watch them.

The choreography looked even better with two more members, each bringing their own energy to the dance.

Contrarily to the way that the song had ended when you and Hyunjin had first shown up, the boys were panting a bit, but other than that, relatively normal. There was no collapsing on the floor or gasping for air, though they were a bit zombie-esque as they each stumbled to grab their bags.

Hyunjin and Han flopped down on the couch next to you as the others wiped off their sweat and applied their scent blockers and Changbin finished off his barbecue chips, eating them in Jisung’s face as promised while the other boy tried to shove him away.

“Okay.” Minho stretched his arms skyward as he finished. “Hannie is going to go get his barbecue chips, so Hyunjin, you go with him to get the others.”

Hyunjin whined and draped his arm around the back of the couch behind your neck. You tried not to react too obviously, but you felt your shoulders tense anyway.

“Hyung, why do I have to go? Can’t Innie or Changbin-hyung do it instead?”

Minho dropped his arms and turned to narrow his eyes at Hyunjin. “If I send Changbin, Channie-hyung will ask him for advice on something ‘real quick’, and then he will be sucked into producer mode and dragging Jisung down with him until they finish ten songs and suddenly it’s past midnight and our reservation has flown by.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Changbin hunched over his bag, smiling mirthfully.

Hyunjin pouted, maddeningly close to your face. “Hyung, Seungmin and Lix would stop them.”

Minho snorted. “You think those two chaos monsters would stop them? They would slip out unnoticed to go to dinner themselves, happy about the extra space at the table. Maybe Yongbok would be able to convince Seungmin to drag the rest of us along.”

Hyunjin shifted in his seat and you could feel his bicep flexing against your neck.

“Hyuuuuuung. What about Innie? He wouldn’t get sucked into producing anything, and Channie-hyung would drop anything if Innie told him he was hungry.”

Minho crossed his arms and moved to stand directly in front of Hyunjin. “Because he did several hours of dance and did a good job, so he gets to rest.”

“Yah, why didn’t you use that excuse for me?”

Minho smirked, still staring at Hyunjin as he ignored Changbin. “I suppose I could do it, but that would mean doing something as a favor to you, and I’m still mad at you.”

Hyunjin whined. “I’m sorry that I didn’t wish Dori a happy gotcha day! I didn’t realize that everyone else knew about it!”

Minho narrowed his eyes, prompting you to intervene. “I could do it.”

Everyone paused and turned their gazes to you. Feeling insecure under their gazes, you shrugged. “Jisung knows the way so I could go with him to get the others if you all want to stay here.”

Immediately, Minho started shaking his head. “No. Absolutely not.” Oh. You felt a stabbing sensation in your heart before he went on. “You are not seeing that studio before we have the chance to clean it. The stench is enough to send you to the mountains to live life in a cave as a hermit and never speak to any humans ever again. Changbinnie’s sweat is like an air freshener compared to that room. Hyunjin will go. And next time, he will remember to wish my master a proper gotcha day, complete with a present and treats.”

Hyunjin sighed and rose from the couch. Once he was behind Minho, he rolled his eyes theatrically at you. You tried your best not to laugh, but when Minho whipped around, causing Hyunjin to flinch, you couldn’t keep it in. Jisung had also seen the whole thing and was cackling beside you.

Changbin looked up from where he had been spread out on the floor having a conversation with Innie. His eyebrows furrowed as he watched Hyunjin grab Jisung and scamper out of the room, the younger boy still laughing. “Do I even want to know?”

Jeongin, who had been watching the entire thing from over Changbin’s shoulder just rolled his eyes. “They were laughing at Hyune-hyung’s anti tissue reflexes.”

Changbin nodded and rolled over. Minho smirked and stalked over to Jeongin. “If you were any less cute, you also would have developed anti-tissue reflexes by now, you menace.”

Innie propped up his chin with his hand and raised his eyebrows. “It’s okay, hyungie. Jisungie-hyung left. You can admit that I’m your favorite.”

Minho stepped over Changbin before sitting on his back. The younger alpha wheezed but didn’t protest or move while Minho told Jeongin, “You’re my favorite maknae. Isn’t that enough?”

Innie rolled his eyes. “I know I’m your favorite. I’m everyone’s favorite. I’m probably already Y/N-noona’s favorite.”

Three gazes turned to you and you startled. “Ah, you’re all tied for my favorite?”

Jeongin groaned. “That’s boring. And probably not true, noona. You’ve known Channie-hyung the longest, you gave him food, and he brought you coffee. He’s definitely your favorite.”

You snorted. “I’ve known him exactly one day longer than I’ve known you, it’s not like we’re childhood besties.”

Jeongin narrowed his eyes in thought. “I need to beat him. Then I can manipulate you just like the others.”

Changbin squawked indignantly while Minho smiled proudly. “That’s my maknae. I’m glad to see that my efforts to corrupt you have paid off sufficiently, even with Chan-hyung trying to thwart me at every turn.”

Jeongin smiled sweetly. “Don’t forget, I can manipulate you too, hyungie.” He stood up to press a kiss to Minho’s head, receiving a soft butt pat in return, before striding over and dropping down next to you on the couch. “You gave Channie-hyung food, noona. Will you give me food as well?” He batted his eyelashes like the main damsel of a 1960s film.

Two could play at that game.

You leaned in and poked his dimple. “I already got you the crackers, didn’t I, aegi-alpha? Looks like the next move is up to you. Where’s my coffee?”

Jeongin playfully nipped at your finger. “I’ll get you coffee tomorrow if you admit that I’m your favorite.”

“Well what if I ask one of the others to get me coffee and they do it without asking for anything in return? Then they will probably be my favorite.”

“Yah, Y/N!” You both turned to Changbin, still pinned on the floor underneath Minho, but smirking nonetheless. “You want me to get you coffee tomorrow?”

A smack rang out, echoing against the mirrored walls and wooden floor followed by a sharp whine as Minho slapped Changbin’s butt. “You have that magazine interview with me and Kim Seungmin tomorrow at five in the morning. I doubt you or Y/N wants to wake up that early just for you to give her a coffee. Looks like you can’t be the favorite, Changbinnie.”

Changbin scowled and wiggled, making a show of trying to dislodge Minho like he was a parasite. “I may not be the favorite today or tomorrow, but my time will come. I’ll write a title track all about Y/N and it will be amazing and it will go viral. People will be doing dance covers from all around the globe. Which one of you can do that?”

Jeongin crossed his arms. “I’m not so sure the company will agree to that, hyung.”

Changbin shrugged as best as he could while being pinned to the ground. “It doesn’t have to have her name or anything. You know our songs are all about subtext. Or did you think that Red Lights was about stoplights?”

“Or that Drive was about driving?” Minho piped up.

“Or that Taste is about Korean barbecue?”

Jeongin smiled widely. “I’m pretty sure that they were actually about stoplights and driving and food. Maybe you two are just perverts.”

Changbin smacked the floor. “Yah, I’m not the pervert! All of my songs are completely innocent!”

Minho smirked and leaned in to murmur into Changbin’s ear. “Wasn’t Yongbok’s section of Taste inspired by the time you two-”

“No!” Jeongin clamped his hands over his ears. “We are not talking about that right now! Hyung, you literally said that we shouldn’t talk about the dirty details of our sex lives in front of noona, and here you go!” He turned to you. “Noona, I am so sorry that these hooligans have no filter. I would tell you that they’re not always like this, but we all know that it would be a lie. Sorry in advance for all the things you will have to deal with. I don’t know how much the company is paying you, but it’s not enough and you should have asked for more.”

Shit, baby, I would do this for free.

“It’s okay, Innie. I sort of knew what I was signing up for. You may be world famous and crazy talented and everyone puts you up on a pedestal, but you’re also just a bunch of hormonal twenty-year-olds who live together and are a pack and go through heats and ruts. Even though I haven’t worked for a pack on this level of fame before, I am specifically trained to ensure that everyone I’m looking after has a healthy sex life. Even if you’re not used to talking about sex with someone you’re not in a relationship with, and I’m not used to talking about sex with someone as famous as you, I hope that you will eventually become comfortable enough with me to say whatever you want without any filter.”

Three sets of eyes blinked at you before Minho started up again. “Does that mean you want to hear about how Bbokie begs Changbin to blow his back out?”

You let out a startled laugh. “I mean, if you’re comfortable sharing it, I wouldn’t mind. I will say that since Felix isn’t here to give his consent, maybe we leave that story for later.”

Minho pouted briefly before the door was thrown open. “Noona! Innie!” Felix practically flew to the couch and landed halfway in your lap and halfway in Jeongin’s.

Minho’s eyes widened a fraction before a more serious expression formed. “Speak of the devil. Or angel. Yongbok, do you want to tell Y/N about the origins of Taste?”

Seungmin joined Minho on top of Changbin, Jisung settled down between Seungmin’s legs, happily chomping his way through a bag of chips, and Hyunjin came over to sit on the couch on Jeongin’s other side.

Chan stayed in the doorway, hands in his sweatshirt pockets. “What exactly are we doing?”

Felix had been too busy peeling off the very edge of Jeongin’s scent blocker to hear Minho’s question or Chan’s, and the others didn’t do anything to stop him.

Felix seemed focused on trying to get at Jeongin’s scent without having to take the scent blocker all the way off, but evidently he gave up and peeled off the whole thing, wadding it into a ball and tossing it over his shoulder. It was only a second before Felix leaned in and you saw a flash of pink as his tongue began to flick over Jeongin’s scent gland repeatedly. The little kitten licks quickly evolved into something slower and more deliberate. Jeongin tilted his head back and tugged on Felix’s middle, his large hands almost completely overtaking the omega’s small waist. You were half sure that you heard a whimper, though you couldn’t be sure which of them it had come from.

You were completely frozen at the two doing this practically in your lap. Felix had shifted his weight so that it was mostly on Innie, but his leg remained thrown over yours.

Felix’s scent was still covered up by his own scent blocker, but with Jeongin’s blocker off and everyone else’s on, the buttery toast scent filled the room, dripping with affection and desire, along with a little pride that he was the one Felix had chosen to seek out.

However, the others didn’t look too put out. Everyone else was just as transfixed on Felix and Jeongin as you, if not more so, yet there was not a trace of jealousy in the air.

On the other side of Jeongin, you could see Hyunjin’s eyes darken. His fingers started to fiddle with the hem of Felix’s oversized t-shirt.

Changbin had his chin resting on his crossed arms, posture relaxed, but eyes sharp and focused.

Seungmin and Jisung were tense as they were wrapped up in each other. Seungmin’s hands clutched Jisung’s chest, leaving you certain that there would be little bruises imprinted in the skin despite his neutral face. Jisung had his bag of chips crumpled in one hand, the other digging into Seungmin’s knee. His own expression was not as passive as Seungmin’s, the older beta’s lower lip caught in his teeth and his eyebrows furrowed just the slightest bit.

Next to them, Minho was leaning back onto his hands, looking just as relaxed as Changbin, but his eyes slightly narrowed and his teeth peeking out from between his open lips.

Finally, your gaze turned to Chan. Instead of the same heavy-eyelidded daze as the others, he looked almost contemplative.

After a moment, he stepped forward. “Felix,” he half sighed, “oh, baby, are you slipping into pre-heat already?”

Felix gave no hint that he heard Chan, moving to gnaw at Innie’s neck.

You were a bit uncertain of what to do. As a caretaker, it would make sense for you to step in and try to bring Felix back into himself, at least until he could have more privacy. However, Felix seemed pretty deep into his headspace and you didn’t want to disrupt that when he was so vulnerable, especially since you had only known him for a couple days. Even if Chan, his head alpha, tried to bring him out of this emotional state, it would be jarring.

Choosing the middle road between a harsh awakening and doing nothing, you slowly peeled off your own scent blocker, allowing your scent to fill the room slowly but surely. You peeled just a little corner, in case you had to reapply it quickly. While it was very unlikely, there was the slightest chance that Felix would turn violent. You didn’t force any specific feelings or hormones into your scent, not even calmness or peace. Hopefully, just the presence of it would be enough to bring Felix out of his trance.

Your scent seeped into the room and you saw the exact moment it hit Felix. He froze, stopping his assault on Innie’s neck and pulled back. His eyes were confused and slightly out of it before they cleared and widened. His head whipped towards you. “Noona! Fuck, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have done that in front of you. I’m so fucking sorry-”

“Felix!” You interrupted. “It’s okay! I know you just got carried away, and like Channie said, I think you may be entering pre-heat. Are you feeling okay to still go out to dinner? We can cancel it or move it if you want to stay in until after your heat.”

He shook his head, starting to look embarrassed. “No, I’m good to go to dinner. Just got carried away, I guess. Sorry, Innie.”

Jeongin blinked the haze out of his eyes. “It’s fine, Bbokie-hyung.” Despite his words, you saw that his hands were still clutching Felix’s waist like a lifeline.

You reapplied your scent blocker as Chan came over and wrapped his arms around Felix from behind. He laid a gentle kiss on the omega’s head before turning to you.

“Thanks for that. I didn’t want to interfere and interrupt his headspace, so I wasn’t really sure what to do.”

You shook your head ruefully. “Bang Chan, you need to stop thanking me just for doing my job. I’ll get used to being thanked and start expecting it and one of these days you’re going to forget to thank me and I’ll just snap.”

He smiled, dimples on full display. “Well, I’ll just have to thank you every time.”

I.N made a disgusted face, sticking his tongue out and fake gagging. It was obviously for Felix’s amusement, maybe even for Chan, but when he caught you watching him, his eyes widened and his ears darkened. “Ah, sorry, noona. That wasn’t directed at you, I’m also thankful for you, but hyungie was being gross and someone has to let him know. Otherwise, he might continue to be gross.”

You tilted your head at him, still smiling. “Well, I am sure that you’ve done your best to keep him in check, but if he’s still being ‘gross’ after all this time, maybe your methods need some alterations.”

“Ah, no,” Chan chimed in, “his methods would work if it was anyone else, but since he’s my maknae, it really just encourages me to be as ‘gross’ as I can, just so I can see that cute little disgusted face of his.” Chan moved closer to you, beginning to stage whisper. “It’s really mutually beneficial when I’m mushy towards anyone because he likes it but gets to pretend like he doesn’t, and I get to see his reaction. It’s a win-win.” His eyes wrinkled as he smiled at you. “Maybe even a win-win-win if the person I’m being ‘gross’ to also likes it.”

You felt your face heat up before Seungmin saved you from having to respond. He forcefully made his way between Felix and Jeongin, kicking a little more than necessary, though you could tell that he was careful about not actually hurting anyone. “Okay, I’m getting hungry and I’ll lock all of you outside if we miss our dinner reservations. And I’m not going to dinner with Binnie-hyung sitting next to me in a sweaty t-shirt. Let’s go, hurry up.” He started clapping to inspire urgency, still perched precariously halfway in Jeongin’s lap.

Chan nodded reverently, arms still around Felix. “Yes, hyung-nim, we will hurry up. Please take care of your precious dongsaengs as we go back to the dorms. I’m sure you’ll treat us well to dinner.”

Seungmin stared blankly at Chan. “I’m not paying for you, Bang Chan-ah. You’re not even moving like I told you to.”

Chan scooped up Felix, the younger boy giggling, and jogged him over to the door, managing to grab both of their bags without dropping Felix.

Changbin was finally freed from Minho, though he laid there for a few more moments as he stretched out his back. Jisung and Hyunjin held hands at the door as they waited for the others. Seungmin pulled Jeongin up off the couch and you followed.

“Okay.” Chan set down Felix who immediately leaned back in between Hyunjin and Jisung. “The reservation is at eight, so we’re going to go to our dorms, and Y/N back to her hotel room so we can all freshen up. This is a nice-ish restaurant, so please, no dinosaur sex t-shirts or sweatshirts with rabbits flipping people off.”

Changbin grinned as he finally made his way over to the rest of the group. “Hey, the company didn’t even censor mine, let alone telling me to take it off. That shirt is classy as hell. They should be begging me to wear it when I get invited to the Met Gala.”

Seungmin huffed and crossed his arms. “You should not be allowed to wear anything to the Met Gala.”

Felix grunted. “Agreed.”

“You know I meant that he shouldn’t even go-”

“Okay!” Chan interrupted. “Before we’re picking what to wear at the Met Gala in this entirely hypothetical situation, let’s pick out what we’re wearing to dinner tonight. Lino-yah, please control your children.”

Minho tugged Jeongin to his side and reached across Jisung to grab Felix’s hand. Walking the out through the door with them, he called over his shoulder, “These two are mine. Kim Seungmin is yours that I’ve been forced to adopt through this scam of a marriage. As soon as you become a billionaire, I’m taking my kids and half of the money and leaving.” You all trailed out after him as Minho continued his plans for divorce. “We’ll start our own music group. In-ah can change his family name to Lee and we can be Leeracha. Then, Hyunie and Seungmin can become a group, and since they’re both tall, or at least, tall-ish, they can be Treeracha.”

Making your way down and out to the sidewalk, the other members started deciding the other Rachas they could be with the common traits between certain members. At one point, they asked you to judge who seemed the happiest for Gleeracha.

As you got into the car and waved them off as they got into their own, you couldn’t help but think:

I could be every single member of Gleeracha with how happy they make me.

…

Taglist:

(Bold means I can’t tag you, sorry for the inconvenience!)

@eastleighsblog

@detectivedoodle

@niaalove

@scarletrosesposts

@royal-shinigami

@peachbokkie

@yuhjoeyuh

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@queen-in-the-shadows

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@sunghoonieee

@urmomsgayforme5

@bonza-bear

@stayconnecteed

@enchantedgrunge

@jen176pink

@finestflora

[absolutebl]

This Week in BL - Japan is Winning on Kisses & Other Alternate Realities

Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.

March 2024 Wk 4

Ongoing Series - Thai

Two Worlds (Thurs IQIYI) ep 3 of 10 - It would be great if we got the alternative romance with dead Kram from Tai’s perspective (JBL style.) Still I like this show. It’s a little bit like I Feel You Linger in the Air only with a love triangle. And while I'm not a fan of triangles as a general rule, I don’t mind it here because the set up is clever. Wayu and  ao are fun sides too. It sure is moving very quickly, which I like. I’m not entirely sure what’s going on. But that’s normal for me with this kind of Thai drama. 

Deep Night (Thurs iQiyi) ep 4 of 8 - They are extremely sappy boyfriends. I love that mom has a secret gf. Could we please have more of them? The love triangle sides are ridiculous, but I do like that it’s all out in the open. I also like they are actually addressing the complicated parental dynamics of owning a sex club. Honestly, I think Khem should have to be a host too. Learn him the right way, girl!

City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) ep 9 of 12 - It’s good, I like the fallout and them actually having to deal with crazy fans and past relationships. They’re so good at communicating it’s kind of a pleasure to watch them suffer through external pressures, because I have faith that they can make it through.

To Be Continued (Thai C3 Thailand grey) ep 6 of 8 - They are such cute puppy dads and so clearly meant to be together, the fact that they aren’t is just frustrating. The fight thing was stupid. And not a whole lot happened... plus singing. I’m getting fatigued with this one. 

1000 Years Old ep 7 of 12 - Did I miss something happening, or did nothing happen? 

Kiseki Chapter 2 (Sun iQIYI) ep 2 of 6 - It’s so boring, there’s so much guitar playing, and it got weirdly voyeuristic (in a very much not sexy way). I’m totally out. DNF

Close Friend Season 3: Soju Bomb! (Weds iQIYI) ep 3 of 6 - I can’t tell if this is trying to be a BL Romancing the Stone, or a BL Hangover, or both. The problem with situational comedy is it must be both situational and comedic, not just option one. The problem with calling something BL, is that it must be BL. This show got 1 of 3 claims correct. 33% is not a passing grade. DNF 

Honestly, it's the HANDS with these two. They do beautiful beautiful things with their hands. If you're one of those hands-obsessed BLabies you should be watching LIBTSTA!

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Unknown (Taiwan Tues Youku YouTube & Viki) ep 6 of 11 - So the worst finally happened. The mountain of pain has fallen down upon us. And now, hopefully in the second half things get better for our boys. But what a rough ride. Normally, this is not my style of BL, but everyone is doing such a gorgeous job with it, I can’t fault it… except that it hurts. The red thread symbolism was elegantly done. I’d like to hope we get a reunion in the next one, but knowing this style of series they’re gonna draw it out. There's gonna be a more pain first.

Love is Better the Second Time Around AKA Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto (Japan Weds Gaga) ep 4 of 6 - Those fuck me puppy dog eyes were perfectly executed. I would not have been able to resist either. Gosh they are so damn cute. This is a great show.

Jazz for Two (Korea Gaga/grey) eps 1-2 of 8 - This comes from the Shoulder to Cry On team so I'm scared, but this one is all actors* not idols so maybe they'll be braver. Boy howdy does it have a fantastic opening sequence. Also the lead is fucking adorable. Mr Broody McBroodypants is cute too. Korea sure loves “pretty but broken.” On the JBL end of the spectrum, is everyone in love with their siblings? That’s weird. The dining room scene was painful. All in all, it's good, I'm intrigued. Let's see how you go little show.

I stand absolutely corrected the lead is a member of NEWKIDD (in my defense I'd never heard of them until Build Up last month). I did recognize him from To My Star because at the time I thought he was too pretty to be only a side character.

AntiReset (Taiwan Fri Viki/Gaga) ep 10 fin - Again there was overuse of previous footage and maudlin navel-gazing grief over something we knew was going to happen. So I didn’t really feel much emotional connection to the drama. 7 year time gap.? t was a cute reunion but the moral quandary never really got resolved. I don’t know how to rate this, I’m not sure I will ever watch it again, so that is a big mark against it.

There’s nothing objectively wrong with this BL except how upsetting it is because of the foundational pygmalion story - grown man falls in love with an android who is basically both his slave and, by maturity level, a child. Yet that premise is crystal clear from the get go, so we watch it eyes open. The actors are cute, the romance sweet, the physical chemistry on point (of course, it’s Taiwan) and yet I was left ultimately unsettled by the concept, content, and plot. 7/10 

My Strawberry Film (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 7 of 8 - I'm so ready for this to be over, and for Gaga to have something good on. Soon please?

It's done, ready to binge, but I suck

What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps

It's airing but...

Graduation Countdown (Taiwan YouTube) - It's too much to ask me to keep up with 2 minute verticals, I don't have that kind of TikTok endurance training. Waiting to binge.

A Secretly Love (Thai Sat WeTV grey) 10 eps - I watched the first ep but grey is too much work for this inferior of a show. I may pick up and binge if it gets distribution but for now, it gets a DNF from me. KimCop might have held this crap together but Kim without Cop? No thank you.

Lady Boy Friends (Thai WeTV grey) 16 eps - reminds me a bit too much of Diary of Tootsies only high school. Not my thing. DNF unless it turns a corner and is truly amazing.

Tangential to the genre

There has been the occasional discussion on this topic here in this little corner of tumblr so I thought there might be a few intersted in this podcast: AmericanThaiGuy Ron Weaver on the Complicated Issue of Racism in Thailand (The Bangkok Podcast)

Thailand passed its Marriage Equality bill through the lower house. It's expected to pass the high house and get signed by the King, but that hasn't quite happened yet.

And MaxTul dropped a photo shoot.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Starting Soon

3/31 Only Boo! (Thai GMMTV YouTube) 12 eps - New main couple for GMMTV in an idol romance about a boy who dances good and a food stand vendor. Other side of the tracks grumpy/sunshine pair who fall deeply in love but, of course, baby boy idol can't date. Boyband but from GMMTV? Control your singing and I'm game.

3/31 The Next Prince (Thai ????) 12 eps - trailer. ZeeNew in a fantasy/historical set in a palace where Zee plays a knight and Nu a prince - YES PLEASE. (Apparently this is just the pilot, not the start of the actual show, see comments.)

4/1 Love is like a Cat (Korea ????) 12 eps - This completed filming Aug 2022(!) which means there have been serious problems with post-production. This is another of Silkwood's Korean+Thai colab projects. Mew Suppasit plays a rookie film star, called the Cat Prince (for his cold arrogance) who goes up against a charismatic puppyish animal daycare director (JM of JUST B). There is a side romance (love triangle?) with a veterinarian. Geonu of JUST B is also in the cast. Dual languages.

Hum, trash-watch-a-licious?

4/3 We Are (Thai GMMTV YouTube iQIYI) 12 eps - University ensemble BL featuring PondPhuwin, WinnySatang, AouBoom, MarcPawinPoon - basically the good kind of messy gay friendship group (so more My Engineer and less Only Friends). Looks a bit like the Kiss series but everyone is queer. I'm IN!

4/11 Living With Him AKA Kare no Iru Seikatsu (Japan ????) 10 eps - Kindly Ryota goes off to uni only to find his new roommate is his childhood bestie, Kazuhito. Kazuhito doesn’t have a girlfriend and Ryota tries to help him figure out why, they fall in love along the way. Same director as Old Fashion Cupcake.

4/11 Gray Shelter AKA Gray Currents (Korea ????) 4 eps - SooHyuk is only just surviving and reunites with YoonDae, an old friend. They end up living together. One of the leads is played by Choco of Choco Milk Shake.

4/18 At 25:00, in Alaska AKA 25 Ji, Akasaka de (Japan Gaga - may not be global) 10 eps - Yuki lands his first starring role in a BL drama alongside superstar Asami (previously his senior at uni). Said superstar suggests they form a sham relationship until filming concludes. As they actually begin to fall in love, the spotlight begins to burn.

Seriously? You're killing me with these titles, boys.

4/26 My Stand-In (Thai iQIYI) 12 eps - adaptation of Chinese novel "Professional Body Double" by Shui Qiang Cheng. Stars Up (Lovely Writer) and Poom (Bake Me Please) directed by the same team as KP (not a recommendation IMHO - my biggest criticism of that show was the clashing directing styles). This one looks well complicated, lemme try: Joe is a stuntman for famous actor Tong. Joe falls in love with Ming but Ming sees Joe as nothing more than a Tong-replacement. After learning this horrible truth, Joe dies. Joe then wakes up in the body of another man also named Joe. He manages to rebuild the same life as before—with the same people eventually re-meeting Ming. Ming wants Joe back but Joe doesn't understand why. But Ming seems to know what's going on and wants to give him some kind of explanation.

I'm exhausted just trying to describe the plot.

Knock-Knock Boys (Thai WeTV) - 4 college friends conspire to help their friend lose his virginity. Familiar faces like Seng (yes, Billy's previous partner) and Best, news here.

Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.

NOTE: It looks like one of my personal favorites of last year Unintentional Love Story is getting a spin off!

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENT

Just these two, in my head, rent free. Thanks Japan!

(Last week)

Streaming services are listed by how I (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are too much work.

The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog @mmastertheone @pickletrip @aliceisathome @urikawa-miyuki @tokillamonger @rocketturtle4

If ya wanna be tagged each week leave a comment and I will add you to the template. Easy peesy. (With so many tags when does a weekly tumblr post become a newsletter? That is this week's philosophical question...)

[ladykailitha]

Icarus Part 16

Hello! This story is back and will be for at least the next two weeks. After that I will be taking a two week break in posting so that I can have a good backlog again. Moving and vacation absolutely destroyed the nearly 20 chapters I had waiting in the wings. I went from 18 to 8 and while I am up above 10, it's not much above 10 (as of right now? 11).

I have four stories going on right now and the goal is to get at least four chapters each so I can have 16 in my backlog. So from Aug 18th, to the 31st, I won't be posting any chapters from any of my stories. I will still post ideas, meta, headcanon et al, but no story updates.

Anyway back to your regularly scheduled metal band Steve!

In this we find out what happened to Barb and why it drove a rift between Steve and Nancy, more about how the bands formed, and Vickie gets a feel for her new clients.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15

~

Steve spent the night with Eddie after that horrible day he had. Once everyone had gone home and it was just Steve and Eddie, Steve curled up on Eddie’s chest and held on for dear life.

“I’m sorry, baby,” Eddie cooed, running his fingers through Steve’s hair, gently scratching his scalp. “When I suggested her I didn’t realize she still held a grudge against you after all these years.”

He let out a long shuddering breath. “Our breakup was entirely her fault. When Barb used my party to runaway with her boyfriend, a boyfriend no one even knew she had by the way, Nancy was so sure that she had been trafficked. That Will just wasn’t kidnapped, but there was a ring of child abductors taking anyone they could get their hands on.”

“As if that’s how that works,” Eddie said rolling his eyes.

“Right?” Steve huffed. “Anyway, she went on this one woman crusade to bring Barb Holland home. Even after Will Byers was kidnapped by a guy who thought he was his son. I tried to be supportive because Barb just up and leaving was scary for everyone. She was making me put out fliers and dragging me to dinners with Barb’s parents. They even hired a private investigator to find her. Had to sell their house to cover it all.”

“So what happened?”

“Finally the PI found her,” Steve murmured, “living in Florida on some beach somewhere, having the time of her life, not even caring about her family and friend thinking she was dead. But by the time they found her she was eighteen and they couldn’t do anything about it.”

Eddie winced and pulled Steve even closer. “What about the guy? How old was he?”

“Twenty-five.”

Eddie’s eyes went wide. “Come again? Couldn’t they have gotten him for kidnapping and statutory rape?”

“They couldn’t prove he was the guy she had run off with and for all they knew they got together after she turned eighteen,” Steve explained, picking at the blanket absently.

“I guess I’m just not seeing how this was any of your fault,” Eddie admitted dryly. “It sounds like it was Barb’s fault.”

Steve let out another sigh. “It was my fault because I took Nancy’s attention away from her friend when she needed her the most and Jonathan knew what it was like, not knowing when a loved one was ever going to come home. That he was sensitive and caring. That he wouldn’t beg for one night of being a teenager and go to some Halloween party.”

“Ouch,” Eddie said with grimace. This was sounding worse and worse for Nancy. He couldn’t believe he had ever trusted her.

“She was already cheating on me before the party,” Steve said, finally looking up into Eddie’s eyes.

Eddie pulled him onto his lap and kissed the top of his head. “I’m sorry, babe.”

“Do you want to know what her excuse was?” Steve said with a scoff. “It was because I was just phoning it in and that I really didn’t care about her, about Barb, that I was just some self-centered jerk. As if that absolves her cheating.”

“You’ve never just phoned anything in in your life, sweetheart,” Eddie said fiercely. “You are always one hundred percent passionate about everything you do. Even crappy jobs like Scoops Ahoy and the coffee shop.”

Steve looked up at Eddie with a soft smile. “Those were the two best jobs I’ve ever had, because if I hadn’t done them, I wouldn’t have been able to do this one.”

“How’s that, honey?” Eddie asked after giving him a kiss on the temple.

“The first one is where I met Robin and the second is where I met Simon, Shane, and Spence.”

Eddie threw back his head and laughed. “That’s definitely one way to pick up friends.”

“Well, we all can’t have the good fortune to have met in middle school and never break up ever,” Steve snarked.

“Wait until I tell you that Gareth isn’t our first drummer and we used to have a different bassist, too.”

Steve shot up and looked Eddie in the eye. “You’re joking, right?”

“Nope,” he said shaking his head. “Our first bassist was Doug Teague and our first drummer was a girl named Ronnie Eckers. Ronnie’s parents forced her stop the band after the middle school talent show when I threw up the devil’s horns and they thought it was a gang sign.” Steve chuckled. “And Dougie, Dougie wasn’t made for fame and fortune. He wanted a simple life with a white picket fence and 2.5 children. He sent Brian a message when we put out our first single saying that it was Brian’s addition to the band that was the reason we made it big. Brian printed it out and has it taped to the inside of his bass case.”

“Holy shit,” Steve whispered. “I never knew. I thought you guys were like The Struts or whatever and never changed band members ever.”

Eddie smiled. “I’m glad you think we have that kind of chemistry, but no. It’s been a bit trial and error before we got this far.”

Steve snuggled back into Eddie’s chest and he wrapped his arms around his waist. “I hope we never have to swap someone out,” he murmured. “Otherwise we’re going to have to hunt down someone with the same initial as the rest of us and probably even snipe the leaving member for good measure.”

Eddie burst out laughing. “That would make for some very interesting entertainment, that’s for sure.” He suddenly straightened up. “Wait. Is that why all your onstage personas begin with an A? Because your real names all begin with an S?”

He looked down at Steve, who was trying not to laugh. “Oh my god! It is! That is fucking hilarious! And no one has ever put two and two together?”

“Nope!”

Eddie just shook his head. “I think it’s classism. The reason they haven’t put two and two together. Why would two rich pretty boys fallen on hard times form a band with two blue collar boys? They just can’t fathom the idea that people from all walks of life can be friends.”

“Simon and my families still can’t understand how we can hang out with you and Robin and the rest of our friends,” Steve agreed. “But I fear that our friends might be playing into it too. That Stupid Steve and Flighty Robin who have always had low paying jobs couldn’t possibly be an international rockstar and his fashion plate manager.”

Eddie sighed. He wanted to refute that, but just last week Steve had gotten a call from Dustin who had spent most of the call berating Steve for not having any ambition. And even some of the nicer kids had expressed concerns that their friends didn’t want to be more than peons at some fancy record label.

Never mind that Steve said he loved his job and being able to work along side his friends was the dream. Steve explained it as doing what he loved no matter how much it paid him, but they couldn’t see that.

“I’m sorry, babe,” Eddie cooed. “Let’s get a shower and then go to bed. It’s been a long day for everyone and we need the rest.”

Steve nodded and got up to pad over to the en suite bathroom. Eddie followed close behind. They merely showered, taking care of each other and then got slowly ready for bed.

Eddie slipped under the covers first and then held out his arms out for Steve. Steve wordlessly went willingly into his boyfriend’s arms, knowing that Eddie would be there for him come morning.

They snuggled under the covers and slipped silently into the warm embrace of slumber.

~

Vickie was working out great and had set up a meeting with Steve and Eddie to go over their relationship status.

“I understand you won’t be able to go public with your relationship for awhile is that correct?” she asked once they got settled into her office, her choosing not to do the meeting in public.

“Yeah,” Eddie said. “I have a history of bad relationships and Steve can’t be out as Abbadon which would make sense public wise.”

Steve nodded.

“Would you want Abbadon and Eddie to come out as a couple at some point?” Vickie asked, shifting the papers on her desk.

Eddie and Steve shared a glance. But Steve shook his head.

“I want Eddie and Steve to be the couple that everyone knows about,” he muttered. “It’s completely selfish of me but I want to look at publications, tabloids, sound bites and all that other shit and know it’s not me they see with Eddie, but Abbadon. The much cooler one.”

Vickie nodded. “But you two were friends before the fame and during, right?”

“Yeah, we were friends in high school,” Eddie agreed, his knee beginning to bounce. “We somehow stayed friends through the first couple of years I was out in LA for that first record. And then Steve and Robin moved out to Pasadena. Which I thought was because our young friend Dustin got into school out there–”

“But it was because he got his own record contract?” Vickie supplied.

Steve nodded and rested his hand on Eddie’s knee to calm him. “Yeah. It was a great excuse, our friend’s mom has always been over protective due to a disease he has. I don’t know if people are expecting us to move out to Boston when he graduates and goes to MIT, but that was never the plan.”

“I think Steve was saying that as long as they are masked,” Eddie put his hand over Steve’s on his knee, “that he didn’t want to come out as a couple.”

Vickie leaned her elbows on her desk and clasped her hands together. “I see here that you and Shane are having your personas Abbadon and Astraeus are coming out as bisexual and gay respectively, is that correct?”

“Yeah,” Steve said, rubbing his thumb over Eddie’s hand, for his comfort or Eddie’s, he wasn’t sure. “That’s another reason for wanting to wait on coming out as a couple.”

“You’re worried about the fallout?” she probed gently. Steve nodded. “That’s fine. That’s what I’m here for. For the first twenty four hours after you’ve gone live on your coming out, I will keep track of all your phones so that you aren’t reacting to a gut punch right out of the gate.”

“But Celeste and Eddie will still have their phones?” Steve asked, rearing his head back in confusion.

Vickie cocked her head to the side. “Robin will need her phone, but I can’t take Eddie’s. Not unless he wants me to.”

Eddie grinned and stretched out, putting his hands behind his head. “I can’t promise I’ll be good, but I know how far to take things now.”

Vickie nodded. She had expected that to be his answer. And if she was honest even to herself, she wanted Eddie standing up for Abbadon. Because Eddie had already handled his coming out and would be seen as a powerful ally.

“Even if you aren’t publicly friends,” she said, “Eddie defending Abbadon is publicity money just can’t buy.”

They talked for a little while longer until they finally wrapped it all up. As they walked out of Vickie’s office to Eddie’s Jag, he got a phone call.

“‘Ello?” he greeted. “Hey Dr. Owens.”

He stopped and held up a finger to Steve as he listened. “That’s great news.”

He listened again. “Yeah, of course. Um...” he paused. “It’s not like I doubt you or anything, but after last time...”

Eddie rounded his shoulders as he repeated, “Uh-huh. Of course,” over and over.

Steve reached out and took his free hand in his. He gave it a comforting squeeze and Eddie’s shoulders got a little less rounded, now that Steve was holding him.

“Yeah, talk to you soon,” Eddie said. “Bye.” He turned to Steve. “How soon are you guys going be finished with your album?”

Steve blinked at him for a moment before he tilted his head to the side. “About a month or so, why?”

A slow small grin spread out over his features. “I think that will be perfect, actually.”

Steve just blinked at him in confusion.

“Gareth is being let out of rehab at the end of the month,” Eddie said gleefully. “So we can finally go on tour!”

Steve grabbed his arms and started squealing. Eddie jumped up and down with him.

It was finally happening. They were going on tour.

~

Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21

Tag List: CLOSED MAXIMUM REACHED!

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[love-lilly02]

The Challenge— Chapter 9

When you died, you were going to have an all white funeral. 

It was something that had been decided by your entire family, not even by your agreement but by tradition. According to them, a funeral was a celebration, not an occasion to be sad. 

When you joined the 141, they were required to ask how you wanted preparations to be set up, if there were any “special requests.”

Your mom answered that one for you. 

Never in his life did Gaz actually assume he would show up to a funeral in white. 

He almost thought he would have to do it. 

“This is bull shit!”

Soap’s yell snaps Gaz out of his thoughts, and he looks back at where the man is sitting on the edge of his seat yelling at the others in the room. Specifically you, who’s sitting there half in tears. If your laughing or crying is still completely unknown to him. “That clue is bull shit and you know it.”

“I’m literally HANDING you the answer!!” You yell back at him, almost choking over both your words and laughter at the same time. 

“NO. YOU ARENT. THAT ANSWER IS SO SHITTY A TOILET WOUKDNT KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH IT!!!” Soap hollers back, and the rookies explode with laughter. 

“ITS A FUCKING MOVE THEY DO!”

“I don’t know what the fuck a pas de deux is but it does NOT. EXIST.”

“Bitch i was one of these hoes for twelve years, I WOUKD KNOW”

And so it continues. It had started out with a simple game between the four of you, well, three considering Si opted out, but it quickly turned into a good natured screaming match over the game. Headbands always turned out like this though, at least whenever Soap played. 

“Thirty seconds, suds.” Price grumbled from the couch, and you snapped your fingers quickly, trying to think of something to give him a hint.

“Fuck uhhh, okay The Nutcracker?”

“Actor?” 

“No, no but you’re close. They move around a lot more?”

“A soldier.”

“No, damnit. Like, like— fuck, fuck!! Okay pink fluffy skirts-“

“DANCER!”

“Yes!!” You scream, and you both jump for joy. Everyone in the room cheers, and Gaz even notices Ghost crack a smile under his mask. 

“Fuckin ‘Pas de Deux’ what kind of a clue is that” Soap grunts, knocking back another drink. You just roll your eyes, sighing loudly. 

“It’s literally a dance move everyone knows. I could have said pirouette and you still wouldn’t catch on, I don’t see a difference.” The silent insult makes him chuckle, and Gaz’s smile widens.

“Lay offit ay? Not my fault nobody knows dance terms.”

“I actually knew that.” Gaz pipes up, and Ghost nods in agreement. “It is a pretty common dance move.” 

You throw your hands in the air as if to say see fucker, I was right. 

Soap just rolls his eyes. 

“Didn’t know you danced,” Gaz said, lifting his drink to his lips. He tries to ignore the way your eyes follow the movement, or how it takes you a few seconds longer than usual to respond. 

“Mhm. Did it with my sister for a while. Wasn’t very good, unfortunately.” Gaz nods, humming. 

“When’d you quit?” He asks, pretending to swirl his drink around in the glass. 

You eye him suspiciously, trying to blink through the haze the alcohol has made in your mind. “Few years back, round the same time I enlisted.” 

Gaz nodded. It felt wrong, using you for information like this. But this had become more than just some challenge for him, it was genuine curiosity. Like there was a constant itch in the back of his mind that he couldn’t get to die down unless he got some answers. 

Usually, Ghost was the tech person. He would be the one to hack cameras, snoop on people, be the physical stalker. The problem they all ran into, though, is that a lot of your life was online. You were the youngest of them all, younger than Gaz even, and while they gave you shit for it, it meant you were way more online than they were. 

Because of that, they couldn’t rely on just your files to tell them everything. There was a world hidden somewhere in all your deleted accounts, messages encoded in emails and photos from after your graduation. Piecing them together was too big of a job for one man alone, especially men of their age. 

So they didn’t do it alone. 

It took your near death experience to make grown ass men to realize how fucking stupid they were being about this. Simon said it himself, the 141 didn’t operate by itself. It was a team. They were a team. They did things together, which meant they would get  their answers together. It also meant they would get to share you at the same time, but that wasn’t a foreign concept to them. 

And none of them really had an issue sharing with each other. 

That night, after everyone else had turned in , Gaz got to work. He used the best lead of you he had (your beginning of the year photo for Junior year, taken just before everything disappeared) and worked his way down. He flew through all of your files, finding names, dates and addresses. Long ago he figured out that numbers were the most important thing in a task like this. Without them you could get nowhere. He followed paths he had taken dozens of times, different directions to get to the same conclusion. There wasn’t anything there. Just like you predicted, it all stopped at your junior year. 

This time, though, that wasn’t what he was looking for. 

Once he hit that wall again, He went back and retraced his steps. He included references to clubs in his search, finding every extra circular at your school and looking into their history. Nothing came up for a long, long time. 

It was nearly sunrise before he found something. Normal people would have seen this and not batted an eye, but Gaz was too keen in his research to miss it. 

In an article about your schools dance team, just a few months before graduation two names glared out on the screen at him. Your name, and someone else’s who rhymed quite well with yours. The gears spun in his head, and he laughed to himself in pure shock.

They were on a a wild goose chase for the wrong person. 

It explained why he was physically unable to find anything on you, because he wasn’t even looking for you in the first damn place. He was tracking down your sister. 

He took the two names and pasted them into his system, hitting enter on the keyboard. 

Over three hundred search results came up, but only one caught his eye. 

“Local College student gets killed in school shooting, family is left devastated.”

He might have to do a bit more digging than he thought. 

Finding the photos was the easy part. Now that he knew who you were, they were everywhere. You really had gotten up to a lot behind their backs, you had at least tried out every club once and volunteered everywhere in your damn state. It was impressive that you managed to switch personalities so quickly, going from someone so loud and outgoing to… well, you. He knew hiding this much information wasn’t easy, having to go under an alias a few times to escape capture taught him that the hard way. But you did it with ease, as if you…

Oh. 

Oh.

He had to tell Price.

AN: if you can spot the audio reference and tell me which audio it comes from, who made it and give me a time stamp i’ll post the next chapter early (as in; as soon as i see the ask/comment)

[shapard]

Feather of Fate🕊️

Lucifer x seraphim!fem!reader

Soulmate arc

I wrote this late at night so not proof read yet.

It's going down~

little Angst, Violence, major death

True Story

Chapter 9 > Chapter 10 < Epilogue

Shock and being scared was an understatement of feelings that Lucifer, Charlie and the others are facing right now. The others follow Lucifer like a lost puppy, as they walked through the halls of the horror Playhouse. 

Lucifer remembered every angle of this place. This is where he began creating things for heaven and then for Lilith. 

Or rather it was. 

His eyes were set on the horrible victims of Michael. The Mangled Angels that looked like the worst demon. 

Worser than any of the demon he saw in hell. Probably even worser than Rue.

At some point they were standing in front of an empty cell that was stained with golden blood and your aura.

Beside the cell there was none other than Leonardo looking right at the group. 

He was already expecting them.

“Long time no see, Lucifer.”

….

You walked with your bare foot on the golden floor, beside you stood Michael, Azrael, and Gabriel. 

They were guarding you up the stairs. Watching you like hawks do with their prey with those glowing dangerous eyes.

You’re going to meet him, the famous God almost everyone is worshipping.

The one you served such a long time.

The one who let you down so easily. 

The God that you were sure despites you with his very being.

Maybe it was wrong to think that way. But you couldn't shake off the feeling that something will happen.

Your hands were still chained up, but your feet were walking almost on Autopilot.

You wanted to stay in that cell and rot in there in peace, rather than facing someone who let you down easily. 

“Y/n?” Your eyes widen at that voice, a warm feeling spread around your chest, and you felt like you wanted to cry. Nothing is more calming than a mother’s voice to its child.

And yet you didn’t look up nor give her nay response that you’ve heard her. After all you didn’t forgive her how she just let you fall and that it was her idea in the first place. 

Michael told you everything.

Even though he can’t be trusted you couldn’t help but believe him. The bittersweet taste that allures you into his darkness was tempting.

You were tempted to fall into his madness. But the memories you and Lucifer shared were the only thing that destroyed you and kept you sane.

Gabriel glared at Sera, “why is she here? She isn’t supposed to be here.” He ushered towards Azrael who just shrugged him off. 

Your hand clenched hard. You don’t want to see her. Not when she looks at you with these pitiful eyes, even though it is her fault all alone. 

“What have you done to my daughter?” Sera looked in horror at the bruises on your wrist and body. The bruises around your wrist were almost deep purple, black almost.

The guilt in Sera was indescribable. It was eating her alive in these last few Months.

It was all her fault; it was a simple punishment that ended in torture. 

“Not much.” Michael answered giving Sera a white rose. “Father wants to see you too.”

You wanted to disappear. The heavy load on your shoulder was too much to handle. 

The hurt of the betrayal from Lucifer was too recent to forget and that your mother showed up is your worst luck.

The pain in your chest spread when you looked finally at you Mother. Feathers all scattered, it seemed she haven’t preened them in a while. 

You miss your wings. 

The walk ended in a huge sky land and pastel clouds were surrounding the area, the light was all centered in one direction where you could see a silhouette. 

A soft tune played. A tune Lucifer used to hum to you when you dozed off on his lap. 

The ghost feelings of his clawed fingers massaging your scalp, not hurting you in the process.

Unwilling tears fell from your eye socket. As much as you wanted to hide your weakened state, you couldn't.

After all that has happened you miss him. 

You missed the Hotel, you missed hell. You missed the time with your friends Husk and Angel.

The soft tune that hummed in the area comforted you in a weird way and a soft way.

A voice called you into the light. 

Don’t go into the light. 

Your mind was screaming at you to run. 

Danger. 

Michael gestures for you to step forward. You wanted to move, but your feet don’t move. The anxiety was filling your lungs making it even harder to breath and stopped every body movement. 

You forced your feet with all your strength just to stand in the light that was a few meters away from you.

“My, My. After all those months and years, I finally can speak to you in person.” You’ve never heard his voice before, but you just know its his. 

His Voice echoed through the wind and in your body through Skull and bones.

The sound of Gods heels meeting the quartz ground was in an even rhythm. As the steps grew closer and closer you found yourself in a panic like state.

What will he do with you? Is he going to kill you or make you his puppet?

A warm but somehow cold finger pushed your chin up and you saw a tall figure with four eyes surrounding its silhouette. 

He has almost the same hat as Lucifer and the same shit eating grin. 

“Poor Child.”

Your eyes twitched; you don’t need any pity from anyone. Not from Leonardo. Not even from God himself.

“I don’t need any of your sympathy.” He only chuckled at your comeback, It interested him indeed.

Even after such a heartbreak you still fought back. “I was almost worried that my son may corrupted you. Michael is a lot to deal with, I must admit.” God lets go of your chin and you almost fell on your knees. 

The sudden weakness surprised you. God snapped with his fingers and the chains broken loose. 

“But I don’t appreciate this type of violence towards my daughter in law. Lucifer wouldn’t be happy to see you in this state darling. So, let’s get you patched up, hm?” This is off. 

Why is he so nice? 

Doesn’t he hate Lucifer? 

Doesn’t he hate you?

God laughed at your cute little misunderstanding. “Oh, my dear I hate nobody. Not even towards Lucifer. I’m just disappointed that this all came so far. You got treated the wrong way because of my recklessly. That’s not how I planned you two to meet.” He sighs, “So answer me one question.” He turned towards you and lifted you up.

The bruises on your body slowly disappeared into your skin. And the pain faded with it.

“What do you desire?”

…

“How do you know we were coming Leonardo?” Lucifer looked with his scarlet eyes into Leonardo’s golden ones. 

“Who wouldn’t save their soulmate. I would, even if it means that I’ll get cast away from heaven. I knew you’d come” Leonardo took few steps forward, but Lucifer stayed on his grounds.

“Tell me Lucifer, what would you do for her?” Lucifer growled. 

He’d do anything for you. 

He wants your back; he needs your back. 

Leonardo lunged at Lucifer with his spear landing a cut above his eyebrow. 

“Fuck.” Lucifer cursed as he tried to find a place for the others to hide. 

There's no escape. 

“Charlie! Find Y/n while I fight him off!”

…

You wanted so much and as soon as these words left none other than God, you found yourself empty headed. “What I desire?” God hummed and looked down at his cane. “Is it money? Or is it something that hides deep inside you dear. I’ll give it to you but choose wise.” Well, that isn’t helping.  

God laughed at your thoughts, sometimes you forget that he could read your thoughts easily. “Let me help you dear.” God stepped forward and folded his hands on your eyes. 

A low glow made you almost slum into a deep sleep. 

But before you could fall into this feeling a loud crash followed and God sighed in frustration. Having children is a bliss but also a stick in the ass. 

Lucifer and Leonardo fought in the air and crashed together in front of Michael who seemed to be amused by the fight. 

“Y/n!” Charlie shouted your name and you turned towards her. “Charlie?!” A happy smile spread on your lips. A little shine of hope burst your heart. “Charlie!”

You ran towards her and threw your arms around her, and Charlie happily hugged you back. “I’m so glad you’re okay!” She said as she squeezed you tightly. “We all were so worried about you!” Angel hugged you from behind, “yeah, the short king almost lost his mind!” you giggled at Angels nickname for Lucifer. 

You were so drowned in your own misery that you’ve forgotten how much you love the others. You always were head stuck on Lucifer that you forgot your drink buddies. 

You break the hug and swipe the tears that escaped your attempt to hid them. 

You watched as Lucifer fought his three brothers. Azrael swung his scythe around his waist to get a better hit on him. The gold blood splattered on the quartz floor, and you hissed at the injured Lucifer who had a huge gash on his chest. 

“I wish I had daughters than sons…” God sighed as he looked at the mess they caused. Gods smile never left his face though.

Leonardo kicked Azrael away with the end of his spear making him land with full force on the quartz floor, ouch. Azrael laid unmoving there and groaned at the back pain. “I’m out.” He said before collapsing on the floor. 

“Why did Leonardo defend dad?” Charlie asked pointing towards Leonardo who stood before Lucifer. “He was always on his side. He just wanted to check if he’s willing to die for Y/n.” God answered and held Azrael under his arm. 

“Now let me take care of this mess.” God let Azrael go and he fell on his stomach. “Really?!” Azrael huffed in anger. 

God levitates down to his sons and they immediate stopped. “As much as I like the reunion, you’re destroying the peace me and Lucifers mate had.” This hurt Michael deep. No not again.

“Really father? You’re defending Lucifer and his soulmate?” Michael gritted his teeth as anger build up in him. After all he has done for his father Lucifer always gets preferred. 

But not with him. 

Michael took the opportunity and flew towards you. You stepped in front of your friends protectively, no one will hurt them. 

Just by your dead body. 

His sword went smoothly through your ribcage right between your heart. Charlie screamed and shouted your name as the sword was in her view. 

The sword went right through you. 

Quite a disturbing beautiful sight. A fallen Seraphim protecting sinners as she gets killed by an Arch Angel.

Lucifer looked in horror and his heart felt like tearing apart. 

He wanted to hold you close but his wings felt like bricks on his back. Every time he tried to fly up to you, he fell lower and lower. And when Michael’s laugh hollowed in Lucifers ears he started to feel immense Anger and rage. 

More than he did last time he fought Michael. 

A monstress growl escaped his sharpened teeth as the fire between his horns grew bigger and more violent. Lucifer felt no empathy as he smashed Michael’s skull to pieces. 

It was the least he could do for you. You were hurt, in despair and he couldn’t help you through it. 

And now Michael took again what was most precious to him. 

You. 

You slumped on to the ground as Michael hold on you stopped and Husk was quick to hold you in his arms.

“Don’t die on me kiddo.” Husk voice broke, the sadness couldn’t hide the truth. 

You’ll die. And nothing can change it. 

Husk pressed plunged the sword out of your chest and replaced it with his hands. 

His power as an overlord was gone, but Lucifer could heal the damage, right? 

The hard breathing broke his heart as he watches you taking his hands softly. “Husky. Promise me-“ you coughed, and blood splattered onto his fur, but Husk didn’t cared. 

“Stop talking, you’ll only use your left power.” Husk pressed deeper onto the wound, but the blood still gushed out at the tiniest hole. You shook your head softly, you’ll die. 

This is your dead end. 

A tear escaped with a few whines, “Promise me to take care of them. Please husk.” Tears met your forehead as you said those words to him. 

Husk cries. 

He actually cries. 

“Don’t say that. You’ll live!” You squeezed his hand as he screamed, one last time and muttered a soft I love you to them all besides Lucifer. 

He wasn’t here with you as your life slowly crept away from your body. 

The dull vessel of your soul just dropped into Husks arms and Husk hugged you close. 

Charlie was a mess. Her crying filled the battlefield and Angel dust was having a complete meltdown. 

Lucifer stopped his Tantrum as he heard Charlies desperate and hurt cries. His body reacted on its own fast and flew towards her and you. 

He fell couple times but tried neither less to get to you two.

Lucifer landed painful on the harsh surface, but he didn’t care. 

He crawled up to your corpse and took it away from Husk as Lucifer hugged you close to him. 

Your usually warm body was now cold, and those live filled eyes were dull and soulless like the void that crept back to him. Before his mind could even collect words, he apologized to you in a mantra. 

He was sorry. 

He wasn’t there when Michael did that to you and Lucifer wasn’t there when you shifted to the dead.

Forgive him.

“Forgive me Apple Pie.”

…

The soft tune played into your mind, painting a picture in it. Flashbacks of your life appeared till you stand in that familiar space with the table and mist. Across the table sat Lucifer but in a light blue and golden appearance.

“Lucifer?” You asked out, your hand twitched. You wanted to feel the golden hair one last time. 

But he was with Lilith, not with you. The bitter truth you avoided, and it hurts you much deeper every time you remembered it. 

Please stop. 

”Y/n?” The way he called out your name and the soften voice that allures you back into the warmth. 

Hot tears burned their way down to the cold stone table. 

What is he doing here? You’re dead right? 

Yes, you miss him very dearly but the betrayal was to recent to just forget it. 

“Just wait for me.” 

You looked at Lucifer, cold. A sting on Lucifers heart but it wasn’t really him. It’s an Image from you and God. And your desire to see him again. 

To hear him at least out, maybe it was a misunderstanding. Maybe Azrael showed you just mere lies. 

“Even though I am not the Lucifer you desire,” he took your hand softly into his pearly white one, “I can tell that your Lucifer loves you dearly and wouldn’t do that to you.” He smiled up to you and stroked the hot tears from your face. 

“But I am dead Luci, and you- He wasn’t even there with me.” And the fake Lucifer gave your hand a quick squeeze. 

“I’m sure he wanted to. Still a fucking idiot but he was fighting Michael off of you, right? That’s a start.” He chuckled and you huffed. 

The doubts and insecurities were another trap you chose to fall in. Maybe he wanted you dead so he can have Lilith.

“But Lilith is-“ He interrupted you with a soft squeeze on your hand and cheek, “Don’t continue that. Yes, he loved Lilith. But he loves you more. Even though I am just a copy of Lucifer from yours and Gods memories. I love you more than anything. Listen to him not to his bitter twin. Hear it from him and if you’re correct you can be mad all you want.” He let you go and gave you a last smile. 

What does he mean? 

You’re dead, no refund. 

Gone.

“Our time Is up. Choose wise apple pie.” The world around you fade away, “What is your true desire?” you stretched your hands out for Lucifer.

you want to go back to him.

“I want to go back to him. Please.”

The soft tune hummed in your head as light surrounded you. As the light slowly creeped away you felt tears on your neck. 

Your eyes flutter open, and you saw Lucifer face buried into your neck. He hugged you tightly, the thought of dying again because of Lucifer hard grip wasn’t one you were burning for. 

“Lucifer?” You called out his name and he quickly retreated from his favorite place, and he watched perplexed at you. 

“Y/n?” He called out, “Is that really you?” He sounds so broken. You nodded and answered with a short yes. Lucifer held your hand in his left hand and pressed you onto his lips so soft and hard. 

His lips danced around your as sparks flew across your body making you feel butterflies all over your stomach. He kissed like it was his last meal. After seconds of intimate making out, he broke the kiss. 

“Don’t leave me again.”

A/n: Feather of Fate is now Over! (There is an epilogue coming!") Hope you enjoyed the short story.

There will be more! But first I want to concentrate on Scenarios and One Shot, till I feel ready to post another story with our Short King. ❤️

Love y'all Pookies❤️

Special Thank you to @ayanazoldyck, @marydragneell and @avadakadabra93 ❤️

💫

Sadly couldn't Tag you.

And of course thank you all Pookies❤️❤️❤️✨

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And thank you to my silent readers

Why do I write like this my last day here💀✋🏽

[lonelystarrs]

He’d Never Admit it -Prt 2

Gojo had a funny way of dealing with feelings, unfortunately it might be a little too late for the sorcerer when he finally realises what they are.

♡ part one ♡ part two ♡

Gojo Satoru x FemReader (Senior High School)

Word count: 5.5k (oops)

Warnings: BullyGojo . Gojo bring a dense menace . Crack . Smut . 18+ MDNI. Dirty Talk . Angst . Cliffhanger. No comfort (this chapter) . Jealous Gojo .

Seven days had passed since the incident on making a mess on dipshits desk, a nickname that Gojo had given the guy who was talking to you more and more as the days went.

It was annoying him, spurring him into feeling agitated -an emotion that was foreign to the six eyes.

He watched as your attention towards dipshit had started to focus more, you were smiling and chatting with him so easily.

So for the last five days Gojo took a slightly new approach to getting your attention.

He was going to cause the problem and then fix it, show you he was charming n’all that stuff that get girls attention, y’know the hero vibe!

Genius right?

Pftttt…

You were currently on path to walking past the strongest sorcerer as he stood acting like he was listening to the girl talking to him in the hallway. When you past he stuck his foot out making sure to catch yours, your books against your chest splayed out across the floor as your hands went to stop your face from hitting the ground.

But Gojo caught you, he never caught you, blinking at the hard floor his hand was gripping your shirt from the back, bunching the material in his hands as he grinned down at you like a Cheshire Cat.

“You’re so clumsy~ can’t have that pretty face all smashed in can we~!” he sang, thinking his smooth little plan had gone his way.

It really seemed it had. Until you squealed.

The buttons popped from your shirt, breasts straining against the material from Gojo gripping it at the back, your whole weight put into the flimsy material. Your arms flew to cover your chest as your tits practically burst from it, buttons popping as they echoed from their bounce down the halls.

Your knees tucked under you and your glared over your shoulder at Gojo, his smirk had dropped clean from his face.

Well, that didn’t go to plan.

“I didn’t-“ Gojo tried, his face not even hinting any amusement as he stared down at you.

“You’re such an asshole!!!!”

“It’s not my fault! Y’ storing cursed energy in those tiddies or something? You lost five buttons! They’re not even massive!”

He instantly regretted the words that left his mouth, he knew he was blabbering nervously but it came out a lot witter than he actually felt. But he couldn’t let anyone else see he was getting jittering could he?

Humour is his defence and deflection tactic after all.

The blush formed across your face as you tried your best to ignore the students who had stopped to watch the scene unfold.

Gojo blinked, eyes drifting to your breast squashed up and exposed from the torn shirt, your arms doing their best to cover you up.

They do be looking good like that though. He thought.

Ah man, he was getting hard again, seriously why did you always affect him like this? You looked so flustered… one of the cupboards wasn’t far from here maybe he could drag yo-

“Look at them tits! Wonder how big they are!”

“Man, a perfect handful maybe a little more!”

Your head snapped around to the boys gossiping who instantly shut up.

“Yeah? How big are your dicks huh? A thumbs length at most, maybe a little more.” You spat sarcastically.

“8.5 inches, 9 on a good day.” Satoru announced whilst he shrugged before bending closer to you and lifting you to him slightly, like you weighed nothing.

“-and it’s always a good day with you.” He whispered the last part winking at you.

“NO ONE ASKED YOU GOJO!” You seethed.

The boys sputtered, girls giggling in the background at them as the attention was briefly taken from you.

Which soon returned when a jacket was thrown over you and Gojo’s hand.

Ah, we meet again, sir dipshit. Gojo thought as his eyes narrowed on a blazer being placed over you.

“C’mon, you have your blazer in your locker right?” Dipshit suggested, smiling at you with some Prince Charming fucking look.

You nodded and stood with his help.

“Nice one, Romeo.” Dipshit mumbled whilst looking over his shoulder at Satoru.

That was day one of Gojo being left stood dumbfounded as to why his tactic didn’t work.

0 to Gojo and 1 to dipshit.

Day two came and he bought you a box of your favourite Mochi as an apology .. without having to actually verbally say sorry.

But Satoru ate the whole box on the walk here.

Gojo frowned as he looked down at the box, seeing one left sitting innocently as if to mock him.

You said to yourself she won’t notice if you have just one and here I am.

0 to Gojo 1 to his sweet tooth and lack of self restraint.

The third day went better, as some one opened their locker a little too harshly and Gojo had got there in time to stop it slamming into the side of your head. His hand flat pressed against the locker door and he grinned at you, you rolled your eyes and shut your own, turning away from him. He looked over his shoulder and glared at the boy who laughed nervously.

“Watch it will you?”

Gojo’s mood changed as he pouted looking at you disappearing into the hall way, his long legs caught up with you quickly and he grabbed your shoulder…

“Hey! I just saved that pretty face again, you’re not gonn-“

He didn’t realise you were drinking some water, tugging your shoulder back had caused the bottle to leave your lips whilst still tilted, pouring it down your shirt which instantly became see through.

Gojo eyed the bottle of water -was it bubbling? It looked like it was boiling in your hand. Blue eyes turning to you answered his assumption.

“Heh, you’re mad at me.”

Your eye twitched, but his eyes kept flickering down to that pretty lacy bra you were wearing under your white shirt, which was now sticking to you like second skin on your chest.

“Fuming.”

Gojo took a step backwards and held his hands up innocently. The bottle soon colliding with his head knocking his glasses half off his face.

“Take your jacket off Satoru!”

Your hands started gripping said item, causing him to laugh at you fumbling with his clothing. He kept his hands up in a surrender but it didn’t stop his cockiness.

“You’re not usually this keen to get my clothes off~! Heh look at you go!”

He was happy to see you walking away with his blazer around you, absolutely swallowing you cause y’know, he’s a big boy and he grinned smugly.

1 for Gojo.

Later that day you’d found him after your last class, handing back his blazer that he couldn’t help notice smelled so much like you now, mixed with his own scent.

Fuck it was a good combination.

“Here,”

“Hmm, I think you owe me for borrowing it all day. I’ve been all cold without it!” Satoru chimed giving you a smirk, eyes looking at you over the rim of his glasses so you could see his mischievous intention.

“You’re kidding right? It was your fault in the first place!”

“Nah I done nothing wrong!”

He didn’t take him much to back you into a nearby cupboard, hiking your skirt up to your waist and pushing your panties to the side. Your hands gripped against the cupboard shelves as he pulled your hips back into him, his breath fanning across your neck as he placed little bites along the skin.

Pressing the tip of his dick between your slick folds and rocking his hips, a long airy moan left him, your hips twitching back as his head caught your clit.

“Watch it then,” Satoru pushed your head forwards, forcing you to watch as his dick slid between your thighs, rubbing along your clit in the process. The head glistening with slick as it pushed through your folds, using them and your thighs as a flesh light. Gojo leaned forward to bury his face in your neck, his hand in your hair still keeping your head down to watch as he thrusted.

“Shit this feels s’good - Hah -I ain’t even done anything and y’so wet already, bet I could slip right in huh?”

“Nah-“ you huffed, arching your hips back before bringing them back as you started to rut against him yourself, Gojo stopped moving and watched as you rolled your pussy against him, tightening your thighs. “-you’ll have to try a little harder.”

Gojo chuckled behind you before pulling back, with the wet slap of his cock hitting his stomach before he spun you around, hands gripping the back of your thighs he lifted you up to wrap them around him. One of your hands gripped the shelf behind your shoulder, the other gripped the hair at the back of his head. Pink dusted both your cheeks as the closet started to get stuffy.

Gojo looked down to the slight gap between you, cock rested against his abdomen, he flexed it watching the trail of slick and pre cum link from his bellend to his stomach.

“Reckon? It’s dripping from just rubbing ya.”

You groaned and pulled his head back roughly, he winced but let out an airy moan.

You rose an eyebrow before a smirk spread on your face. You tugged his hair again, even harder and watched as his dick flexed, his hands tighten on your thighs and a moan caught on his throat.

Oh, the cocky bastard liked it!

“You’re pathetic Satoru, you really have no idea do you? Hurry up and fuck me then before a change my mind.”

You lifted and rolled your hips forward, your hole catching at his head, it only took him one thrust to slid in. A moan leaving you both as you clenched squeezing him. his cock flexing again in you as he felt you adjust around him.

“Shit -how are you always so fucking tight?”

He shifted you, lifting you a bit higher than him and wrapping his arms around your waist. He went to press his face into your neck but you pulled his head back again by his hair to take in his expression. Blue eyes glazed over, light pink across his cheeks and his mouth slightly open.

“You look so fucked out already Sato’”

He didn’t say anything, his eyes drinking you in.

“Open your mouth,”

And he did, your hand pulling his hair back again as you let spit gather on the end of your tongue, Gojo watched as you slowly let it dribble onto his own. Cock flexing again he moaned, closing his mouth he swallowed without even being told.

Because this was his way of being sorry, ‘cause he fucking loved it when you took control of him like a dog.

But he’d never admit that.

“Guess I can be a lil rough,” he mumbled before twisting his hair from your grip and burying his face into your neck, arms wrapping even tighter as he started to fucking rut into you. His heavy moans and sighs fogging against your neck, vibrating down your skin and making you clench around him

“S-slow down Gojo-“

“Nah, I’m way too fucking fired up now.”

Day four however took a turn of events, he hasn’t actually seen you today which was unusual.

However when he did see you it only spurred something ugly in his chest.

Anger wasn’t an emotion that Gojo felt often, if at all. He was far too care free and lacked any real connection to most things, he didn’t care deeply enough for things to get him angry.

Or so he thought.

Seeing you at that coffee shop with that fucking guy?

That did it.

Yeah that guy! The Dipshit.

Gojo didn’t get it, did you not understand the message he was giving you when he made you cum all over the guys desk? The guy who was asking you about your dating choices?

The message was clear, so he thought anyway.

You’re mine.

But he’d never admit that, right?

You actually ended up going out with him even after Gojo made a sloppy mess between your legs and had the name Satoru falling from those pretty plump lips of yours as you cum over his tongue again and again. He didn’t even relieve himself with you that day on the desk- that’s how selfless he was being that day! Yet you were actually went on a damn date with him! Even after he fucked you dumb yesterday in the closet!

And you were happy.

You were laughing, smiling and fucking flirting with him.

You didn’t smile at him no matter his goofy behaviour -you never laughed at Satoru Gojo.

That really bugged him. He was always goofy and silly!

And he knew your body inside and out -he always made you feel better after he upset you. That guy didn’t, as far as Gojo knew anyway.

Shit, wait, what if you cum for that guy like you did the six eyes? Was he better than him? No freakin’ way! Is that why you were happy and smiling with that guy? Shit, shit, shit.

“Satoru, you good?”

“Huh? Yeah m’fine,” he waved Suguru off side glancing at you again from his booth at the cafe.

“Really? You look like you’ve just been dumped.”

“What? I’ve never been dumped, no one’s dumped me!”

The all too fast reply was humorous, it didn’t match his trying to look cool facade -in fact he broke it altogether.

Geto rose an eyebrow, a smirk twitching at his lips, his eyes had seen his best friend staring at you with another guy and he seen those blue eyes of Gojo’s stealing another side glance like he was worried to miss something.

Suguru chose his words specifically when he said the dump word.

Plus that defensive sputtering of a reply that was so out of character from his usual cocky, flippant friend?

Oh no, this was hilarious ! Satoru was actually hung up -he was upset. Over a girl.

“I didn’t say you had, said you looked like it,”

“Tch, whatever. There’s not even an expression for that kinda crap, you’re talking shit Suguru.”

Geto’s eyes widened slightly, pink dusting across Gojo’s cheeks, his body and emotions totally betraying the look Gojo was trying to give -flippant and unbothered.

“Man, look at you!” Geto laughed, leaning forward on the table to point at Satoru’s cheeks “-the blush brings out the blue in your eyes~”

Gojo slapped his hands away and glared over the rim of his glasses. Leaning back into the boot he swung an arm over the spine of it, man spreading and shifting his pose to deflect his feelings as if trying once again to convince his emotions into what his body language was showing, however they still weren’t meeting to agree.

“So you’re not into her?”

Gojo snorted and rose an eyebrow at Suguru,

“Her? As if,” Gojo waved his hand dismissively “-not my type.”

Suguru nodded, crossing his arms and leaning back into the booth seat, turning his head up to the ceiling as if he was in thought.

“Yeah, gotta be honest you’d be punching with her Satoru. Guess you’re not into wife material,”

Suguru was playing the game and it was working.

Gojo frowned as he looked away eyes unfocused as he stared aimlessly into the cafe.

“Aren’t you dating Gojo?”

“-who said that?” You practically spat, you were flustered but it came out more aggressive than you wanted, seeing as you cleared your throat and asked again in a nicer manner, still looking at the guy like he has grown three heads.

“Uh I mean the whole school is whispering about it, you not seen that little fan club of his death glaring at you?”

“What idiot would date Satoru?” Your nose wrinkled as if he disgusted you, as if the thought of actually being with him was so unimpressive that you couldn’t imagine someone that would go for him. HIM, GOJO SATORU UNIMPRESSIVE! The audacity!

“So, you’d be up for me taking you out for a coffee? It’s the least I can do y’know.”

The conversation ran clear, even as he ate your pussy an hour after they were spoken it still rang at the back of his head. That insecurity of his that he buried being triggered.

You’re not good enough, everyone thinks you’re annoying and only see you for your potential -only see you as the six eyes.

The whole conversation you had and he heard, your reaction to dating him was actually hurtful -why did he disgust you? Sure he teased you a lot, but he always made you feel better! It was part of the game right? He teased you, you get angry and you both make up.

He was good looking -incredibly so if you asked him and most people. He always smelled good -he bought really expensive cologne. He was hygienic, his clothes were always clean and stylish. He had money. He was the strongest sorcerers around even at 18. He was the pride of his family.

So why did he disgust you? Why did you act like he wasn’t good enough?

Tch.

So you wanted to act all high and mighty huh? Like he wasn’t good enough for you.

Well, Satoru would settle the score -he’d stop the rumours and clear things up no problem!

Let day five commence.

“Oi,”

Your shoulders hunched as you heard that dreaded voice appear in class, it was Friday and clock out was fast approaching, in fact this was the last lesson of the day before a few weeks holiday. You were sat at your desk grabbing your book for the study session.

A hand slammed down on your desk as he half bent over, reluctantly you looked up and your face fell. His shit eating grin was smug, eyes glistening over the rim of his glasses as they reflected from the sun bouncing on them through the window.

“You left these at my place-“

Hanging from Gojo’s index finger were the panties he’d ripped off from you last week, looking innocent as they swayed so silently from his digit as he lifted them to gain focus on it -no he lifted them so the whole class could see them.

The gasps from the room flooded your ears, your eyes darting to see everyone in the class was looking at you both.

“Satoru that’s too fa-“

Oh? The fact Suguru was finally saying something was perhaps enough to kick your brain into drive that this was actually happening.

“Ah, they didn’t fit you Satoru? What a shame,” even though you were trying to deflect him the heat was rising to your face, feeling up your neck like bugs under you skin.

Like Gojo fucking Satoru under your skin.

Gojo snorted and rolled his eyes.

“Wrong pair those looked great on me. These I ripped off you remember? Hence the condition, thought you’d want’em back for your new dipshit boyfriend.”

In a fluid movement he bunched the panties in his hand and pointed that thumb over to someone behind him. Your eyes followed and landed on the guy you’d been to coffee with, your eyes then followed to where he was sat and it clicked.

That desk..

“He’s not my boyfriend, you’re the dipshit!”

“Yeah yeah, s’what you said ‘bout not dating me yet you’re leaving this at my place hmm?”

He grinned at you, if you were less upset you’d maybe see that his eyes weren’t entirely amused like they usually danced with when he teased you. You’d see he was hurt, he was annoyed there was a slight hardness to them.

But he’d never admit that.

Your hand covered your mouth and cheeks in an attempted to cover your face going beet red, eyes filling with tears as the shear embarrassment hit you like a train. There were so many eyes on you and you felt corned. Your heart sank to your stomach, drowning in the acid that sat there, eating away at you so viciously you felt nauseous.

You stood from your seat, clumsily grabbing your bag and books, looking at Gojo with enough pain on your face to make his own expression fall.

The glistening of feral amusement from his eyes dulled as he set his gaze on what he could only guess was his first look at heart break. -his first look at really hurting you.

No, this wasn’t right, it wasn’t supposed to make him feel like this.

Your hand lowered slightly to release words that made him freeze.

“I hate you Satoru,”

It was eerie how quietly and calmly you spoke, yet it was just so fucking sad how your gentle voice cracked. There was no insult, no temper -nothing.

No, this was different to your usual anger, this wasn’t how it usually goes. You started off like you always did, keeping him place and bantering back. But this?

You never said you hated him, you never looked at him like that before. These weren’t tears of frustration this was something else.

Suddenly he didn’t think your eyes looked so pretty like this, glistening with tears that he caused.

You turned and he stood frozen at your run from the room, everything slowed as you left. How your hair whipped around you, how those stray tears left you dancing a battle through strands of your hair. It was all so clear as time slowed and that was nothing to do with his unique eyes.

The class wasn’t full of people yet -you hated crowds and always got here early but there were a few here.

Suguru gripped the back of his collar and pulled him back, dragging him out the class.

“Satoru, you’re beyond dense. You really outdone yourself this time.”

The next few weeks of a short holiday flew by and Satoru heard nothing from you, his texts not delivered and his calls straight to answer phone.

Satoru > Yo pretty

Satoru > you ignoring me now? Don’t do that :( you’ll miss me too much~

Satoru > c’monnnn babe don’t be like this :( I know how you make you feel better~! ;D come spend next weekend with me! I’ll even take you to get some Mochi, there’s this Zunda and cream flavour you gotta try! I’ll buy you a box!

Satoru > oi stop being a big baby, talkkkkk toooo meeeeeeeeeee!

Satoru > oi

Satoru > hellllllooooooo

Satoru > ╰⋃╯ both know mines bigger :D he misses you <;3

Satoru > Hey, it’s been two weeks, seriously you good?

Satoru > Hey, y/n you’re not back at class, can you just let me know you’re good?

The return to senior high for the last few weeks before everyone left for university or careers came and went quickly -he never saw you again.

He never seen you to tease and he missed it, he missed finding you to annoy you. He missed burying his face in your thighs to cheer you up, he missed pushing that silly school skirt up, he missed how your thigh high socks felt under his hands as he grabbed your thighs whilst bullying his dick into you.

But he’d never admit that to you.

“Y-You’re a r-real asshole you know that?”

A flat line presented on Gojo’s mouth, cracking his can of drink open his head tilted in the direction of the voice, blue eyes looking over his glasses as he stared at the guy without much expression. The guy brave enough to stutter an insult to him.

Yeah, the guy who took you out on a date. Sir dipshit.

“S-s-sorry what was that?” Satoru mocked uncaringly, stuttering to remind the guy he was scared to talk to him.

“Yeah, that! Exactly what I mean. She never dated me you idiot -I asked her out for coffee so she could help me come out to a guy I liked, who’s now my boyfriend.”

Gojo’s heart accelerated in his chest, he finally understood what the phrase meant ‘the colour drained from their face’ because he literally felt the blood dropping from it.

God that was weird, he’s never felt that before.

Outwardly he stayed collected -he stayed cool because he was Gojo Satoru.

“So?”

“So?! Everyone’s noticed how grumpy you’ve been, you deserve much worse after what you did. You should have just asked her out like a normal person would, but your crappy god complex wouldn’t allow that would it!”

“Who said I liked her like that?”

He deadpanned at Gojo, the silence between them was thick as the blue eyes stared at him without much expression trying so hard to remain cool. Trying so hard to not show his discomfort.

But his heart was bouncing against his rib cage, his lungs were trying to pick up his breathing as his emotions started to physically unsettle him, Gojo’s palms were sweating yet he felt a cold rush over his skin.

What the hell was going on? Was he sick?

“You’re kidding right? Do you not realise you’re completely head over heels for her? The whole school knows it, how do you not? Y’know, you don’t deserve her, good job you have no idea, you were so mean to her because you couldn’t figure out you liked her and you’re useless in dealing with it. You saved her from it.”

Turning and fanning his hand dismissively over his shoulder Gojo was left to stand by himself with his can of drink fizzing against the silence he was plunged into.

Eyes blinking, his cool attitude and posture absolutely crumbling to a dumbfounded display.

He liked you?

Is that what this was?

No he didn’t like you!

Right?

The whole school knew? The fuck?

Gojo collected his phone from his pocket, turning on his heels he walked down the hallway whilst making a call.

“Satoru,” Geto answered

“I like her?”

“What? Was that a statement or a question?”

“The whole school knows I like her, what-“

“Oh, her. You finally realised huh Satoru?”

“YOU TOO?! Why didn’t you tell me!”

“You’re hopeless,” Suguru sighed heavily down the line, “-like you’d have done anything about it. Thought it was best forgotten after the last day you seen her, it’s been weeks and schools over, s’a bit late. She’s gone Kyoto for university Satoru.”

“How do you know that? She’s not carrying on as a sorcerer?”

“I seen her last week at Jujustu Tech. Her dad died recently on a job and he wanted her to get away from it all.”

“Her dad died?”

“Yeah, that mission couple weeks ago with the train, that special grade took him out and she finished it off, she has a pretty nasty domain apparently. She had a meeting with the higher ups about it, she was injured.”

You never told him about that, ah man, if Gojo didn’t know what guilt felt like before then he sure fucking did now.

Is that why you weren’t messaging him?

“Just let it go Satoru, you screwed up, move forward.”

No, that wasn’t why you weren’t messaging him.

You weren’t talking to him because of what he did, because of how he was treating you. Because of what he did the last day he saw you.

He tried to forget it because hearing you say you hate him was horrible, seeing you truly upset was weighing heavy on him and the fact he wasn’t there this time to wipe your tears, or make you feel better didn’t sit right with him.

But you’d disappeared from his life, you’d ignored his texts and calls, you left him.

Was it really too late?

You really had left.

Your house was sold, waiting for a new family to occupy the building. Gojo stood before it frowning, hands in his pockets as he looked over it looking so empty and lifeless, a mere shell of the comfort it would bring him. He’d see your cursed energy residing within it, sometimes your dads if he wasn’t away on missions.

The same building that looked so different now, weird to think it had your window on it which Gojo had thrown stones at in the middle of the night when he was having trouble sleeping. He rarely needs a lot of it and his eyes are the reason for his lack of sleep, not to mention his intake of sweet things to try keep his mind stimulated.

It was only getting worse as he got older, he seemed to realise. Yeah, both his eye sensitivity and his sweet tooth.

You were never particularly happy about it, him rattling stones at your window when your dad wasn’t home.

“Piss off will you?! It’s like 2am you menace! Quit throwing stones at my window and find someone else to torment.”

So he did.

Stop throwing stones at your window that was, he’d still turn up only this time floating innocently outside your window knocking on it asking to be let in.

“I told you to quit it Satoru!”

“Nah, said stop throwing stones at ya window so I did, just knocked instead.”

“Get in before someone sees you!!”

Worked like a charm. Every time.

Now though? Doubt he could be getting away with that at the new owners. Besides you weren’t there.

Turning he left the house behind him and found himself walking past it at least once, maybe twice a week for the next two years.

He hoped he’d find your cursed energy there, maybe the new owners were distant family and you’d come back to visit.

But the family held no cursed energy, not even a flicker of it. So Gojo eventually stopped walking by, but one place he did return to was the grave of your dad.

He’d leave a flower there.

“Guess I shouldn’t have been such a dick to her huh?”

Silence as usual.

He’d stand and leave, sighing as he now replaced his glasses with his blind fold he had started to wear because it was being too much for his eyes to deal with.

Everything was so damn blinding.

At first he thought of you everyday, thinking he never used to think this much about you when you were around.

At least he didn’t think he did. Besides Suguru and Shoko he didn’t really rely on anyone, but perhaps you were someone from his past that he could have included on that list back then that only seems to get shorter.

When Suguru dumped him outside KFC, not one of his classiest moments, Gojo truly started to feel alone in this life.

As the weeks turned into months, months turned into years and he gradually forgot about you the best he could, only occasionally being reminded of you every now and then.

Usually when another girl asked him about his past relationships.

“So you’ve never had that special someone?”

They all thought they’d be that thing for him but they never were, 90% of the time he couldn’t even get around to sleeping with them. He wanted something deeper than surface sex, sure it felt good but something was missing.

He never had a relationship, because he just wasn’t the kind of guy to be involved with someone like that. His work was dangerous, he alone would make anyone around him a target. So Gojo kept his distance, his god complex grew trying to bury that deep, gnawing insecurity and stomach churning loneliness. His infinity kept people at bay, both for his emotional and physical protection, burying his sickening need for touch by something that loved him.

These girls after you? They never stood up to him, they were pillow princesses and only aided his dominant nature. He never got that rush that he got with you -that high and low.

He was never as hard as he was for you, that 9 inches on a good day? Yeah, definitely remained at a 8.5inches

He stopped comparing to you after three years, he stopped thinking about you and he buried his head into his work because the weight of Suguru leaving him was another thing for him to carry. He was lonely and he didn’t want more people close to him again and feel that loss.

Funny, because the people he loved were still alive and left him, it hurt more than people dying around him that he knew.

Suguru was a deep friendship lost, you were something he didn’t fully understand.

He started to get comfortable, he started to move forward from you and Suguru…

Then the order came from the higher ups.

Stood in the usual room, Gojo remained in the centre, bored and irritated with these douches already sputtering at him.

“There has been an issue in Kyoto, we need you to go and investigate, students have been going missing. There have been rumours that a cursed object has been confirmed, resulting in a reincarnation of a past cursed spirit rising. You are to investigate and execute, minimal damage and lives lost Gojo, we mean it this time.”

“-and put a damn curtain up will you?”

He didn’t even reply, turning he fixed his eyes in front of him, he heard them and had nothing to say because his mind was else where.

Returning back to you, just when he stopped thinking about you almost three years later.

Kyoto?

That’s where you went right? He’s pretty sure Suguru told him you’d be studying at a university there.

Well, I hope you guys enjoyed <3 I’m tempted to make this into a part three in a slight time skip. Hmm! We shall see, do we need a part three for closure & comfort? Cause I think so 😎

Thank you thank you thank yoouuuu for all the comments / reblogs etc 🥹

Tags: it isn’t letting me tag everyone! Sorry! I’ve tagged the accounts that are letting me. I’ll try again tho. <;3 ps I won’t engage with ageless blogs or blank ones!

@tomiokas-lunchbox @krisp0415 @ifartmangos @ritsatoru @ekaterinatepes @angrydaughter @jessie9008 @marie-morningstar @love-me-satoru @jspenft

© pharix 2023 permission is not given to repost, translate or post anywhere else.

[anundyingfidelity]

I'M A RUIN — Soldier Boy/Ben (Part IX)

Summary: After the events of the Seven Tower, you present Grace Mallory a new secret project you're working on already to develop a cure to Compound V. The only problem? You need Soldier Boy for that.

Pairing: Soldier Boy/Ben x female reader

Word count: 2.3k.

Warnings for series: set after S3 (spoilers), some OOC!Ben, some depressed!Ben, angst, hurt/comfort, eventual smut, slow-burn, language, PTSD, reader has Compound V (she's no Vought supe tho), Soldier Boy being an usual asshole, reader is a fucking liar.

Warnings for this chapter: some spoilers and references to S4 and Gen V, mentions of sex, mentions of kindaping, so much lying from these fuckers!!

Notes: idk who's still interested on this crap because my original drafts went to hell once S4 dropped (but also my fault i was waiting for that lol), anyway I'll try to be consistent with this is giving me nightmares i swear. thank you if you're still here 😭

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And if it wasn’t much worse, there he was still, lying down on the other side of the mattress, sleeping and snoring like a stray dog you just took in to protect him from the dangers of the night. Who would have thought? But you wanted this. You fell for it eventually. And you didn’t give a single shit about it, not yet. It was great, you had to admit that. In the end, Ben was right, he could fuck pretty good and could bark about that with good reasons.

Part IX: Nobody’s Business

Rolling on your side of the bed, your eyes fluttered open. There was a warmth coming from the mattress, one that you were not used to every time you woke up. That side always came up empty, but then your mind replayed the memories of last night's events. The small and soft light emanating from the window forced you to sit up abruptly, covering your breasts with the bed sheets. The clock told you it was almost 9 a.m.

But duties are duties, you told yourself, sitting down and reaching your phone on the nightstand. There were six missed calls from an unknown number; you were pretty sure who that was. With a scoff, you got on your feet and full in your naked glory, stepped out of the room, just taking your dress from the floor to put it on as best as you could while you heard the line from the other side.

“Oi, I’ve been calling you, answer the damn phone,” the British voice on the other side spit.

You grimaced, pulling the phone away as he yelled at you before speaking. “I had important things last night. Sorry for having a life,” you lied gracefully, making your way to the kitchen to boil some water for a tea. “Besides, since do you care? I barely fucking know you, so tell me what is it before I hung up.”

Butcher sighed from the other side of the line. “I need the kid back.”

“Ryan?”

“Yeah, and I need something for it. I don’t wanna force him, but tough times require even tougher methods…”

There was a silence coming from you, trying to process his words. Soldier Boy wanted the kid, Butcher wanted the kid, and Homelander of course wanted his fucking kid. You didn’t know who was the best for Ryan. Homelander was out of the league immediately, but maybe Butcher was the only sane motherfucker between them to take care of him. After all, he was his dead wife’s son.

“What do you want me to do? You’re not gonna kidnap him, right?” you asked, unsure of what would happen if you agreed to help Butcher on it.

“No, but don’t play innocent. Can imagine you have plenty of analgesics to take down an army, doctor.”

You pictured that fucked up smirk on his face at his words, and followed his game to see if you could get somewhere.

“And what do I get in exchange? I’m not giving anything for free.”

“Novichok. Put him to deep slumber and can test the strongest drug you have on Soldier Boy without getting killed,” he whispered over the phone, as if someone was hearing his words.

“Alright, deal,” you accepted, taking off a cup to pour your tea. “Send me the address and we can meet today. Just don’t mess with me, I don’t have enough arguments to trust you right now.”

“And I can respect that. Should be receiving it soon, darling.”

With those final words, Butcher hung up the call.

Your head felt spinning, as if something had crushed you so bad. Your body hurted, and you were sore. Probably you regretted it. Not because it wasn’t good, it was something else. What had happened between Ben and you wasn’t supposed to be. It just simply couldn’t. He was a killing machine you were just reaping, eventually discarding him when you took what you needed. However, the right time to test the Anti V prototype had yet to come. Sipping from your hot tea, you heard hard steps from the stairs, and for some reason, you were not prepared to face him the morning after.

“Ah, preparing my breakfast already, doll,” Ben said cheerfully, much to your liking, and approaching you as you faced your back to him.

His arms wrapped around your waist, and as much as you wanted to enjoy his touch, you pushed him away and turned on your feet to see his confused grin.

“First of all, good morning. And second, no. You can make yourself a sandwich,” you replied.

A smile appeared on your lips as his own slowly faded away.

“So, nothing for me, even if I made you feel so good with my cock?”

“God, you’re so gross…”

Ben snorted, leaning to give soft kisses on the skin of your neck as he whispered. “I don’t remember you complaining about it last night.”

As an impulse, you shut your eyes. His touch and lips over your sensitive skin were too intoxicated for you to react quickly and stop him. Ben took the cup of tea from your hand, putting it on the countertop; the place he fucked you so good the night before. He would kill to go again, with you beneath him, yearning and crying for his dick. Or maybe he’d fuck you in the couch before taking you to your bed, exactly like he did after you did it in the kitchen…

“Stop,” you said, pushing him away softly.

He did as you asked rapidly, licking his lips, and watching your lustful gaze intently. You wanted it as much as he did, but it wasn’t the right time.

“I’m still sore,” you continued. “And I have some stuff to do right now. I have to go.”

He nodded. “Right.”

To your surprise, Ben gave you some space and you stepped up, not before taking the cup and your phone between your hands again. You stopped, standing by his side for a moment.

“Maybe later?” you said, watching his face attentively.

That sleazy smirk curved on his lips. “Later.”

You walked away then, feeling his eyes over your figure. God, you were so fucking regretting offering yourself to him already for some reason.

You sat down on the dining table as he settled down a saucer and two cups of tea with a bowl of biscuits.

“It’s not necessary–”

“Nonsense, take it,” Butcher said, taking a seat in front of you.

He served you and him the tea with an elegance only a British man could ever have, not that you expected him to have that inside. Butcher was a soldier once, now an undercover agent whom you had no idea what to expect, besides the few things Grace had told you about him, but she wasn’t there. This meeting was hidden from everyone. Butcher crossed his arms on his chest, looking at you with an expression you could not decode. You were barely knowing him after all.

“I’m not trying to poison you,” he joked, taking his own cup to taste the tea.

“Well, thanks for your kindness,” you took the cup and sipped the warm drink. It was surprisingly good. “So, weren’t you after Victoria?” you asked, following the previous conversation you had with him before sitting down.

“Yeah, cunt’s indestructible,” he remarks. “Can’t do anything now, planning on just retiring and just leaving it all...”

“There’s a fucking outburst right now between Homelander’s cult and Starlight fanatics, Victoria is almost there along with Robert Singer at the White House. Why you wanna give up on that?”

“I’m not part of the team anymore,” Butcher confessed, taking you aback.

“Is that the reason you want Ryan back?”

He nodded and you sensed vulnerability coming from him. The tough facade, the immoral plans, the thirst for revenge for the fucker who screw up his life and made his wife’s a living hell… Even your own thirst for payback and burning Vought to the ground wasn’t as big as his own grief. After all, you were just another piece on the chessboard. Butcher saw you as one, and you did the same with him and Ben. You were just taking in things that would help you to reach your own, selfish goals. One can’t compete with that.

He coughed in the middle of the silence you shared, and you noticed there was a black liquid coming off one of his ears you have never seen.

“Are you okay?” you worriedly asked.

Butcher looked like he noticed your eyes staring at the side of his face and wiped up the substance with his finger, cleaning it up with a napkin.

“You stopped taking the temp V?” you insisted on his silence.

“Yeah, I fucking did, and then had it again. The true V this time, didn’t help. Just accelerated my own death,” Butcher seemed like he didn’t give a shit as he told you.

“Fuck, are you crazy?!” you exclaimed.

“Thought it’d save me, alright?!” he ranted. “Thought it could. So I could say I had more time with Ryan, but I don’t. That’s why you’re here. Do you have what I asked or not?”

Grumbling, with your jaw tight, you took from your jacket a small packet of white powder and tossed it on top of the table.

“A sedative. Will keep him asleep for days if you’re not careful,” you announced. “Give me the gas now.”

Butcher stood up abruptly, and searched for something in one of the kitchen cabinets. He took out a grey cylindrical vessel, similar to a fire extinguisher, and left it on the floor by your feet.

“There you have it,” he said, before taking his seat back.

You didn’t say ‘thank you’, neither did he, but Butcher dared to speak out again.

“Can you come when Ryan is here?”

“Excuse me? I don’t know the kid, I don’t see why I should be here.”

“Another secret is good enough for ya,” he insisted. His face was just as plain as yours.

You didn’t know what else to expect from him at this point, but you followed him up.

“And?”

“There’s something down Godolkin. A virus, created to exterminate supes,” he explained, leaning forward and whispering as if someone else could hear outside the walls. “If your cure ain’t working, maybe you could use some help from there.”

Ben emptied the last drawer in your room. There was fucking nothing. The only pleasure he took in from sniffing into your stuff was checking your underwear, from the most comfy cotton panties to the lingerie he’d love to see on you while he fucked your brains out. And then, nothing. Emptiness. No secrets, no files. Nothing.

Not caring of putting your stuff in place, he just tossed them into the drawer. If you were to indulge back there, you would certainly notice the mess. But he didn’t care if you did. He fucked you good, but that didn’t mean he trusted you. That’s why he spent the last hours of the day checking the whole place after you left him all alone and by himself. The past few days, he had spent checking everywhere to find a clue or something that could give you away easily.

Tired, Ben went down to the living room and checked between the bookshelves, only to find dust and old books he didn’t give a shit about. He scoffed to himself, and walked to the back of the room, where the aisle ended. The carpet felt different, as if another floor was down there. He knocked on the floor with his fist. He was right; there was another floor down the living room.

“What are you fucking hiding in here?” he mumbled to himself, his mind pulling the tricks of any stuff you could probably have down there.

He pulled the carpet away and found a small metal knob, unlocked. He opened it just to reveal stairs and he went down carefully. A heavy metal door stood in front of him, an electronic panel with numbers by the side. The walls were also made of the same material, and he tensed. It wasn’t a good sign. Before, he noticed you would sneak out of your room some nights. There was no other place you should be visiting but here.

He thought of breaking the door, but it wasn’t that subtle. There was a code to get inside, probably he could get it. It had to be something important for you, right? Shouldn’t be so difficult.

But he knew better than to continue playing this fucking game of hiding the thruth from him. Anger seized him in a second, thinking of endless possibilities this could be a hidden lab. You were a doctor after all, he knew what those cocksuckers were capable of. You were no exception.

He clenched his fists tightly, and heard in the distance the sound of your car. Ben quickly climbed the stairs and covered the door to the basement. The click of the door announced you were home and he made his way to the kitchen to take out a bottle of whiskey and two glasses.

Once you stepped up, he poured the liquor. You left a couple of bags full with groceries on the kitchen counter as Ben gave you a dirty smile and offered the whiskey to you. It was his way of disguising what he really felt.

A quick fuck should do, he thought.

“So, later, right?” he said, taking a sip from his glass.

Immediately, you knew what those words meant.

“You’ve been waiting so long I see,” you smirked.

He pulled you closer with a single hand before claiming your lips in a harsh kiss. He smiled when you moaned against his tongue and he pulled away, this time his lips claiming the sensitive spot on your neck.

“And can’t wait any longer, sugar.”

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