#And with the ''make a better world'' thing my guess is the count lured them with exactly that promise

[bellmo15-blog]

Changing Cocoon Capers

Once again, my sona's found himself in some more cocoon based peril ladies and gentlemen. And ironically this one’s also green two like the last one I put my self insert though lol. I just can’t stay away from them, can I? Though there’s a lot more slime in this one. And hypnosis. So you know, it’s right up my ally! This is one of the Changeling Cocoon’s from My Little Pony Friendship is Magic. Yep, this is an MLP: FiM based pic meaning this is bound to get some flak from people who still think it’s the 2010’s and haven’t moved on from there hate for this show just from this pic simply being associated with said show lol.

No but seriously, if you do STILL have a rabbid hate boner for this show even after over a decade and a half or you still make it your mission to make fun of people who do like it then that’s a good indicator that you need to go outside, touch grass, realize that there are better things going on in the world than people liking something you personally don’t and while you’re at it, do something actually productive for once!

Of all the things in Friendship is Magic that I had a massive fascination with, Queen Chrysalis and her Changelings were one of the biggest. I mean if the fact that my original Ponysona was also a changing didn’t give that away the fact that those cocoons of theirs would remain on my mind for a VERY long time even after I admidatlly fell out of the show will. And I could never figure out why I had such a fascination with them until later in my life. So I guess this could count as another one of those “scenes from my childhood I never understood why I had such a fascination with until I became an adult?” Kinda? I mean I got into this show when I was 17 years old meaning I was a year away from becoming an adult so I guess this does still kind of count even if it was at the very tail end of my “childhood.” I don’t know, 2014 was kind of a transitional period for me.

Well, I’ve had these things on my mind again a lot this year. Even playing out some fun scenarios in my head of Queen Chrysalis using her powers of shapeshifting and hypnosis to lure my sona into her hive by turning herself into Shantae and then storing him inside one of there cocoons to feed on there love for the half genie later. Which is also the story behind this pic. I’m sure the real Shantae will come save them soon though… once she get’s out of her own coccon that the queen has trapped her in heh.

Artist is ~SnakeyThingyBoi.

[reitziluz]

finished with slay the princess. it was neat. best thing i got out of it was inspiration for a fully different kind of story.

(spoilers, btw)

maybe i'm just not feeling this type of cosmic horror. idk. "don't try to rationalize that which defies logic" the game says and keeps on logicking itself without committing to saying anything concrete in case it could be too weird or stupid or smth. not that it needs to do what i want. it's just... i mean, it did tell the story it had set out to tell with just minor wobbling towards the end. it wasn't bad. it just didn't have the oomph it would have needed to speak to me.

maybe because the romance ended up kinda basic "because Love" kinda thing. maybe that too was because... the routes you took ultimately had very little effect in the endings. it would have been a nightmare to actually make it all count, of course. but still. i'm left feeling a bit empty, after being hooked so strongly by the premise.

now the fully different kind of story. what with the always present empty shackle and how the narrator wants to keep you in there forever, i fully expected the pc to be the actual beast of the end. and the princess to be bait, a lure, a part of the trap that's like. tragically gaining true selfhood through the repetitions. man, it could have worked with the true nature of the narrator what with how he had separated and made tangible the gods by giving one of them his body (i mean, assuming how the reflection decays into nothing and is then revealed to be how the narrator looked like). like it could have been a case of ooh in his hubris he had birthed or even become the end of everything and then had to try and contain it! the decision to preserve or end a world that wasn't already naturally ending would have felt way more... consequential. more relevant.

idk. it would have been a bit more spicy and complicated that way. as is, the narrator side of the story is... rather weak and simplistic. not bad, but not Enough for me.

hm. i guess my main gripe with the story that was actually written is the lack of... coming together. the game tells you the shifting mound is the totality of all the potential vessels, but that's not what's shown or experienced. you literally can take the third option of leaving with just one vessel. and you leave the voices behind, or they hate you, or they act as your posse. an insane moment of "you are the friends made along the way" was right there! it would have worked with the themes! the high romance of creating each other in your own image! how we exist not alone on our own but in the intersections where we meet each other! giving up control and preconceived notions and the safety of an omniscient view and instead going out to discover the world and yourself and each other! accepting that there's multitudes and things unknown! all this could have been delivered better, or at least with more and wilder pathos!! hell, some of the route endings did just that, where did that energy go in the finale?? such a missed opportunity not to have the voices coalesce and voice the previously unvoiced lines and take the decision making away from the player AT LEAST in the ascension ending. c'mon!!

still like a 7/10 even from the pov of my personal enjoyment, tho i doubt i'll ever get back into it. i do admire the skill and effort it required to pull it off. the ending also was serviceable, and the parts where the narrative got a bit muddled can be overlooked if you're not afflicted by Chase The Logical End Points Of Implications disorder. 10/10 for giving me fuel for mansion of the end (a story that's been on the backburner)

-10000 points for not having the mc be a dragon for maximum princess/hero/dragon symbolism and shenanigans (i am biased but also Right)

[kaluawoo]

Okay I know we're all still upset about the Happenings this chapter, but one thing I don't think I've seen anyone mention yet (spoilers, I'll try to add a read more once I'm not on mobile anymore bc idk how to do it in the app):

Mikuni's thoughts after the flashback. "I wonder if it's really true that [no one] could put him back together again if [he] fell from the wall" (the kanji for he was the one for Egg, and the ones for no one were the ones for iirc "even the king", because Mikuni was thinking about the Humpty Dumpty thing).

Mikuni is imo planning something with Tsurugi's "broken"/dead body, something that probably involves trying to "put him back together", because that'd make the little flashback scene make the most sense. (Or it was just general foreshadowing that he may come back, but I'm willing to bet that Tanaka Strike put "Is it really true that no one could a broken Tsurugi together again?" right before Tsurugi losing a very vital body part with at least some intention to follow up on that.

I'm still gonna cry about it until we finally do see Tsurugi get put back together, though.

... also, that implies Mikuni was thinking about chopping off Tsurugi's head and sewing it back on, or some equivalent, since he was a teenager. Classic Mikuni tbh.

[murderousginger]

Another Mess

Angel on Fire Chapter 5

John Shelby x reader

Word count: 2,362

Warnings: Drug use. Crass talk. Angst. They're criminals guys, they do bad things.

Note: This is where I upset everyone. This is the moment the fluff goes a bit sour and John's really got to earn his title of loverboy. Can he do it?

You walked to John silently, noticing his grip on the phone made his knuckles white as he leaned against the doorway looking into the kitchen. He jumped when you rested your hand on his shoulder. 

"Tell him I'll do it," you said softly, mouth going dry.

John spun, eyes wide as he looked at you. 

"You don't have to--"

"I'll be there in a bit, 'Zay," you said louder so he could hear you. 

"It's okay, John," you whispered as you held his face and touched his forehead to yours. "One night at a time, eh? And you gave me such a good day."

John squeezed his eyes shut for a moment as he took a deep breath. 

"We'll be there within the hour," John said to Isaiah. You heard an excited yip on the other end of the line before John hung up. 

"Do you need to change? Anything you need before we go?" John's eyes flashed between annoyance and care like a lighthouse in the night. 

You kissed him softly, feeling him stiffen then relax in your hands as you nuzzled against him. 

"One night," he repeated,  more to himself than to you. "We can get new bait girls. You can stop like you want."

"Let's go get me changed then," you said in between a few more kisses. "Go save 'Zay and your little brother from a bad night."

"I'll give them a bad night for interrupting us," John smirked as he bit your lip and pulled you in by the waist.

"Or you could make my night better once we're done," you giggled.

"Let's go before I forget why we need to stop in the first place, love," John growled into your ear, giving you goosebumps.

----

You pulled up to the Garrison, John's warm hand on your beaded thigh and his coat wrapped around your shoulders. After he parked, he walked around to let you out of the vehicle.

You took his hand as led you out toward the busy bar. You both looked at it for a moment.

"John," you whispered, feeling his hand entwined with yours. "We can't walk in this way."

John squinted at you as you let go of his hand and went to take off his coat.

"You know that no one will talk to John Shelby's girl," you said as you shot him a look. "I'm here to save your asses and sell snow, am I not?"

John sniffed as he took his coat, head dipping.

"Yeah," he said. "I guess that's true."

"Hey now," you said as you took a step toward him and put your hand on his cheek as you kissed him. "Don't look at me like that. Do you really want this to be the night you present me to the world beside you? A bait girl, selling snow and luring customers, with the John Shelby? Finn would faint. What will the rest of your family think?"

"Tommy has no room to talk," John muttered bitterly. "And Polly will love you after she meets you. Arthur likes everyone."

"Do you want me to do what I came here for,  or do you want me to be your prize?"

"I want us back at the house without interruptions and your clothes laying as far from you as possible, love," John murmured into your lips as his hand snaked around to grab your butt. "But I'll have to watch you shimmy around the pub instead. Maybe once you're done we can sneak out and have both."

"I'll sneak with you anywhere, Mr. Shelby," you said breathlessly. "But business always comes first, doesn't it?"

"You don't know what buttons you push, woman," John groaned as he squeezed your butt harder before letting you go. "After you, miss. I'll come in a few moments after."

You smiled and kissed him one more time before turning to walk. John smacked your butt and you stumbled forward with a giggle before finding your step again and opening the Garrison door.

Busy was an understatement. The bar was practically packed wall to wall, with Isaiah and Finn looking panicked at the end of the bar. No one noticed that you didn't exactly have an escort, only that a new girl in a slim beaded dress entered the room. You smiled at the onlookers and began your rounds to lure men and groups to the boys for snow. 

You brought two energetic young men to the boys, greeting Isaiah and Finn with a smile. 

"Boys," you said. "These two men want a dip in the snow. Give it to them?"

"Can't say no to a lady," Isaiah said with a smirk and a sparkle in his eye before looking at the men. "How deep do you want to tread tonight?"

----

John sat in the Blinders business corner with Arthur with the door open. He wanted to watch the packed bar and see her bait them in. He wasn't sure if it gave him a thrill to see her flirt so brazenly or if it burned him inside.

"Watching that bait bird awful hard," Arthur said as he finished off his glass. "Does our John have a crush?"

"And if I did?" John said as he side eyed his brother. Arthur chuckled. 

"I'd say be careful of the young ones, brother," he said as he clapped John's shoulder. "Their cunts are sweet but they'll break your heart if you don't watch out. Be gone like a whore with her dollar."

They both laughed as Arthur pulled John toward him in a slide hug in the booth.

"She looks sweet enough, you sure you ain't gonna break Finn's heart taking her?" Arthur joked. "Or Isaiah already claiming that one in a closet somewheres? Best stick to drugs and women you pay, brother. That's my motto."

Arthur pulled out a small blue bottle and smacked it down on the table. He made two lines of snow directly on the table. Harry came in with a new bottle of whiskey and refilled their glasses, purposefully not looking at the men and drugs in front of him. He left with a nod.

"Join me, brother," Arthur boomed once Harry left. "To loose women and loose morals. More so when they meet."

"... one line can't hurt on a night with no work, can it?" John laughed as Arthur egged him on. 

"Why stop at one?"

----

Hours later you had dutifully flirted and baited plenty of men and groups to the boys for a sale. Your feet were starting to hurt in your heels and you were growing tired of the plastered smile on your face. The night was winding down but the bar was still full, just not overcrowded.

Harry brought you a shot as he delivered a table their order, and you gave the old man a real, grateful smile in return. The whiskey burned its way down your throat and warmed you, easing through your body and helping you relax. Bar close was soon; not long now.

You had felt John's eyes on you most of the night. You could feel his stare and even his annoyance as customers flirted or touched you. It put you uneasy, not sure how to both do your job and keep John secure that it was just a job, one that his family benefited from and wanted you to do. His possessiveness had come so fast and it worried you. 

As the night moved on you felt his eyes leave you more and more, and when you would sneak a look in that direction he was going on with Arthur, talking and laughing. Good. The distraction of his brother made your job that much easier. You'd have to talk with John once the night was over. Even if you quit being the bait girl, you couldn't live under someone who made you feel like you weren't trusted. 

You sent another boy from out of town, a well off Londoner that came to Small Heath to be close to the danger of gangs to have a story to tell his mates, to Finn for a hefty amount of blow to take back as a prize for the night. You smiled at Isaiah as he clapped Finn's shoulder, made eye contact with you and nodded for you to follow him. 

You made your way across the room and disappeared into the storage room in the back moments after Isaiah disappeared behind its doors. You found him in the back of the room with the barrels of whiskey and beer.

"You did it!" He exclaimed with a laugh as he picked you up by your waist and spun you around, making you erupt into laughter. "You really saved our asses tonight, (Y/N). I don't know how to repay you."

He set you down in front of him, hands still on your waist as you looked up at his giant boyish grin. It was infectious.

"We'll starters is you could never interrupt my dates again, 'Zay," you playfully chided as you snapped his suspender under his jacket. "And secondly you could find more bait so I can get out of this mess."

Isaiah's eyes widened as his smile grew mischievous. 

"Date?" He whistled low. "With one of the big men? That's why I found you at John's?"

You nodded, one eyebrow cocked at his response.

"I knew he was watchin' but no clue he was serious," he said more to himself than you. "Figured you were just playing with a boss man while you had his attention."

You smacked his shoulder, making him laugh and pull you into a hug.

"Oh shush now, girl," he said as he held you close. "It's a good night with good money made. No need to ruin the celebration."

"So you are a fuckin' tarte after all," a cold voice called from the door. 

You spun to see John with his arms crossed, scowling at you and Isaiah. 

"What?" You said, watching John's eyes flicker with anger. 

"It looks like you're about to have a celebratory fuck for the night before running back to me to have me drive you home like a good little soldier, that's what," John hissed. "I've been a fool this entire time, haven't I? You've just played a game this whole time. Damsel in distress is actually a trifling whore."

"John, calm down," Isaiah said as he let you go and took a step forward with his hands up. "It's not at all what you think--"

"Shut the fuck up, Isaiah, and get out of here before I cut you," John seethed.

Isaiah stepped forward again. 

"I'm not leaving--"

"Go, Isaiah," you said softly. "I'll be fine. Just go."

Isaiah turned to protest but stopped when he saw your face. He sighed and nodded, walking past John who stayed in the doorway. The door closing behind Isaiah made you flinch at the sound.

"Since when do my boys listen to you over me?" John squinted. "What sort of hold does that cunt have--"

"What's wrong with you?" You asked, stepping forward as your anger raised. "Do you really think--"

"Why did you sneak off with Isaiah if not for a fuck, eh?" John snarled, his arms still folded as he strolled to meet you nose to nose. "Why are you hiding in the storage closet in his arms?"

"Why are your eyes so blown out?" You asked as you scrunch your face. "And why is there some dried blood near your nose?"

You reached up to wipe it away but he bucked away from your touch, grabbing your wrist.

"Let go," you said, your tone dangerously low as you looked at him in his practically black eyes. "My friend wanted to update me on the sales for the night away from the buyers. He was excited he made enough money for you. If you don't trust me, why would you want to date me? Now let me go."

"Big tone for a little girl," John said as he looked down at you. 

"I could start yelling at you instead," you said flatly. "But I don't particularly want to have a screaming match. I'd much rather talk to you, or rather, talk to the John I just spent the entire day with. I'm not sure who I'm looking at right now."

"Still John."

You hummed, looking him over. Something was off. He was too easily agitated. Too full of himself. Too bull-headed. This was the John of legend, and you hated it.

"I thought you were tired of the life," John said. "Maybe I was wrong. Whisking you away to the country can't turn a whore to a proper woman."

"Are you trying to save me for my sake," you said, exasperated, "or yours?"

He blinked, his face blanking at the question. 

"This doesn't feel like it's about me at all," you hissed as you jersey your arm from his grasp. "I think this is about you and I want no part in whatever this is. Goodnight, John."

You moved to walk out.

"I--"

You stopped beside him in the doorway, standing on your toes to fully look him eye to eye on his own level.

"I said goodnight, John," you said firmly. "Do not follow me. Do not speak to me. And for fuck sake, do not go after a girl's heart just to call her a whore ever again."

You stomped out, hiding yourself from Finn and Isaiah as you snuck through the crowd and out into the cold air. You sniffed, realizing you had tears on your cheeks and your nose was running.

"Miss--"

You turned around quickly to see Arthur, bushy brows knitted together in confusion as he bounced on his toes with his cigar in his hand. 

"Oh no," you said as your voice cracked, your hand shooting up in a 'stop' gesture before he could walk toward you more. "I've had enough of the Shelby's tonight. Goodnight, Arthur."

Arthur shot you a confused look but stayed in place. 

"Alright, then," he said with uncertainty. "G'night then, miss."

You turned and ran into the night before anyone else could see your tears.

[chuckbass-love]

Johnny smut#4

Hello lovely anon. Thank you so much for this request, again, i’m sorry for the long wait but i didn’t want to write this when i didn’t have much motivation and then have it turn out any less than perfect. I hope it’s worth the wait for you and that you enjoy it.

Also a lil A/N for everyone: To everyone who has requested, i’m gonna get back on it and try and get at least 2 or 3 out per week if possible. I lost motivation for a hot minute but i’m back. I love you all so much. Also, part 7 to only love can hurt like this will be up sometime in the next week or so. I’m still working on it but i already can’t wait for you all to read.

Disclaimer: My work is not to be posted anywhere else other than MY Tumblr, Wattpad and Ao3 without my permission. However, reblogs are welcome.

Pairing: Johnny Storm x Fem!Reader

Prompt #4: “You’d better be quiet if you don’t want to get caught”

Warning: Smut, explicit content, sexual intercourse, hair pulling, choking, mouth covering and swearing. 18+

Word Count: 5,160

GIF NOT MINE!!! Credit to @mcustarks go check them out❤️

Best Friends Brother

As your eyes glance around the beautiful garden filled with white chairs either side of the aisle with flower arrangements all the way to the alter. You can’t help but feel utterly enchanted by the scene, it’s stunning. However, you’re in the wrong place right now, Sue specifically asked you to meet her out back to help her get ready but as soon as you turnaround to head there, you bump into Johnny of all people.

To put it simply, Johnny isn’t exactly your favourite person and you’re not his either. Well, that’s a lie. When around others you don’t get along, you don’t hate each other you just don’t really have much to say since he’s always so cocky and you’re his older sisters best friend. But behind closed doors, the sexual chemistry is off the charts and you’ve spent too many nights tangled up in his sheets to count on two hands.

No one knows about your late night rendezvous though, especially Sue. And she can never find out. It would hurt her. You’re her best friend and Johnny is her little brother. So it’s a secret and it will always remain one.

“Wow” his lips curl up into a genuine smile as his eyes take in your figure in the floor length  dark purple bridesmaid dress you have on “you look, great” he says as he tugs on his bottom lip with his teeth, clearly unable to stop those dirty thoughts running wild in his head.

“Just great?” you ask, brow raising slightly before you chuckle and move to walk past him but he grabs your arm just in time to stop you from going anywhere “not just great, but gorgeous. In fact if this wasn’t my sisters wedding then i’d say you were the best looking one here” he turns his head in your direction, his dreamy blue eyes meeting yours, both filled with lust and need. But you can’t do this here. Today is Sue and Reed’s day.

“Johnny” you whisper lazily, the feel of his skin on yours makes you shiver with desire for him to fill you up, kiss you and make you cum around his cock multiple times but that will have to wait. You really need to snap out of this. So you do, you blink and look back up at him before slowly pulling away from “Sue needs me now, i have to go” and just like that he’s behind you, watching as you walk away. Mostly just to watch the way your ass moves in that dress. You can’t say you blame him though, your ass does look good.

The second you step foot indoors you hear Sue moaning about anything and everything to who sounds like Alicia.

“Your saviour is here” you announce and Sue turns around, beaming at you and you can’t help but stare at her. She looks absolutely breathtaking and her dress is the most beautiful you’ve ever seen. She looks just like a princess.  Alicia then leaves to go and check on Ben, leaving you two to it.

“Sue, you look amazing” tears brim in your eyes, drowning out your vision, she spots it immediately, rushing to hand you a tissue “don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry. You’ll ruin your makeup”

You take it from her, dabbing underneath your eyes before taking the eyeliner from her to re do what couldn’t be saved in time “i can’t believe you’re finally getting your big day” you finish zipping up her dress before helping her out with her veil.

“Well i’ve waited long enough” she laughs as you finish up and you turn her round so she can look at herself in the mirror.

“Now, i just need to finish my make-up. Help a girl out?”

You don’t even bother to respond, instead you start helping, picking up her bag of products. Her foundation is done so it’s just her eye makeup and lipstick that’s left to do. You go with a nice subtle smokey eye with a little silver glitter on top. Then to finish it off you apply some nude lip gloss to her lips before leaving her to do her own mascara, you would hate to mess it up after all.

“Oh i forgot to check with you, is Johnny outside?”

Even the mention of his name has an obvious effect on your body and it’s something you’ve never been able to control but instead of letting it show, you put your poker face on, clearing your throat and mumbling a quick “yes” and thank god she doesn’t catch on or say anything. You must have hid it well.

“Right, ladies the guests are arriving now and Reed is helping them all to their seats so are you ready?” Johnny pokes his head into the room and Sue nods, letting out a deep breath.

He glances at you before Sue walks over to him to make their way to the other room in which she’s going to be leaving out of to walk down the aisle, leaving you standing there sighing.

Guess it’s time for you to take your own place too. You follow closely behind them and then you and Alicia wait for your queue to go, she goes first, then you. Flowers in hand, smiling around at all of the guests, every one of them dressed up in bright colours, wedding hats galore. And as you take your place next to Alicia at the side of the alter, you watch your best friend walk down the aisle with pride. She means the world to you and if there’s one person who’s the most deserving of happiness, it’s her.

Reed wipes away tears as she stands next to him and you feel your heart melting, more tears forming. Johnny watches you from across the way, wiping your own tears of joy before his focus shifts to the vows.

Sometimes he gets urges to ask you out on a date but as quickly as those urges form, they fade. There’s not a chance in hell of you saying yes to him and he knows it. He’s just a hookup and he’s no stranger to half platonic relationships. He’s never particularly been one for commitment anyway but something about you changes his mind. Since you’ve been Sue’s best friend for god knows how long now, he’s watched many guys come and go in and out of your life. He’s watched and even listened to the many times Sue has held you whilst you cried and to tell the truth, he’s never been able to fathom why anyone would ever want to hurt you. Why anyone would ever cheat or leave you. He always had the biggest crush on you and it’s never left. 

Hence why one day he made a move, giving you his best cheesy pick up line at a party Sue threw one weekend. But you ignored him, it was only 2 hours into the party and you weren’t drunk enough to be taking him seriously. However, multiple drinks and shots later, he tried his luck again, and he hit the jackpot. You took him up on his offer. Whilst Sue was in the other room trying to clean up after her guests, you were in Johnny’s room, stripping off in-between heated open mouthed kisses.

It’s pretty obvious where that lead and the next day, you were so mad at yourself for letting it get that far. You cursed alcohol and your stupid brain as you quickly re dressed, repulsed at yourself and your actions. That’s when Johnny shot up, trying his best to make you stay, shutting the door as you tried to open it and standing in the way. You made eye contact with the player and he kissed you. You can’t recall anything else other than feeling captivated by him. His lips moved in sync with yours like they were always made to touch and you couldn’t control the way your body yearned for more.

And the rest is history. Since then you’ve been late night texting and meeting up whenever you could to hook up. Johnny eventually got his own apartment too which only lead to more often than not, the pair of you fucking like rabbits.

It hasn’t just been hookups though, as much as you’d love to lie and pretend that it doesn’t mean a thing, it does. You like Johnny, of course you do. He’s actually the only guy that’s ever been able to make you cum. The only guy who isn’t completely selfish in bed. He makes it all about you, every dam time and you feel torn when it comes to him. A huge part of you knows the two of you feel something deeper and more than just sex. You feel something more intimate. It’s definitely not love but it could be, one day.

Before you know it, you’re ripped from your Johnny themed thoughts as everyone starts cheering and clapping. You join in, watching Reed kiss Sue passionately before the two of them walk back up the aisle. You, Alicia, Johnny and Ben all follow behind with the guests joining in.

The reception is just inside and as soon as you all enter, the music begins. The real old school music. You’re The One That I Want from Grease. The DJ really has a way of luring everyone onto the dance floor right away. Usually at weddings, everyone sits down drinking and chilling before the buffet food comes out but not this wedding.

Sue grabs your hand and the two of you re enact the classic Sandy and Danny scene, overly dramatic though of course and unbeknownst to you, Johnny is watching your every move, unable to stop himself grinning like a cheshire cat. It’s very clear you’re having the time of your life and all he wants is to be able to dance with you.

Once the song is over, you walk around the room to look for the table that you’re going to be sitting at until you hear “over here” and you know that voice anywhere. You turn around to find Johnny sat down, a large glass of wine next to his beer. He ordered for you? Why?

“You’re next to me, hope that’s okay” he stands up, helping you into your chair and tucking it in for you before taking his seat again and sliding the glass of wine to you.

“White wine is still your favourite, right?” nerves fill his voice as he keeps his eyes locked on you “yes, it is. You remembered. Thank you” you waste no time in taking a big gulp of it, you can practically feel yourself getting aroused just by sitting next to the man and to think you’re going to have to deal with it the whole day is torture.

You press your thighs together, trying your hardest to stop whatever is happening in its tracks.

“You not going to dance some more?” he asks, sitting back in his chair, one arm draped round the back of yours “maybe in a minute, i’m still recovering from the first one” you giggle nervously, scared of being seen with him. Sure, you were put with him by Sue herself but what if your farce comes apart now, after all, he is being nice to you and the resting bitch face is missing instead a happy expression has taken its place.

Maybe no one will notice since it’s Sue’s big day, that could be the excuse you use if anyone says anything but then again, why should you care to make excuses? If you enjoy his company that shouldn’t be an issue. Maybe Sue won’t care. She’s always wanted Johnny to settle down with someone nice and you’re nice, right? She’s also wanted you to find someone too. But her best friend and brother getting together probably isn’t what she had in mind.

The song Crazy In Love by Beyonce comes on and Sue practically summons you to the dance floor, so you down the rest of your wine before you rush over to join her. Skipping the regular moves, you and Sue both start dancing like it’s just the two of you. No move off limits as you both grind your hips in circles, shaking your asses and laughing your heads off. She is the only person in this world that can make you laugh like that and you feel incredibly lucky to have her and to be here for her big day.

As your moves get more risqué you catch Johnny adjusting his cock in his dress trousers before drinking more of his beer.

The tension is building within you and you’ve never had to fight temptation so much in the whole year that you two have been doing this. You’re usually very good at waiting and making him wait for it but right now, it’s too hard. The next song that comes on is Check On It by Beyonce, again.

The more of the song that you dance to, you notice the lyrics surprisingly match your situation and a wave of confidence drenches you like rain.

If you got it flaunt it, boy I know you want it While I turn around you watch me check up on it Oh you watchin me shake it, I see it in ya face Ya can't take it, it's blazin’, you watch me in amazement

You continue to show off your best assets, making sure you tease and wind him up more before you make any kind of move which is what you usually do. Any time the two of you fool around, you make him wait and earn it, but it’s one of many reasons why he loves hooking up with you, you’re not easy, you know your worth and you’re 100% worth the wait.

The song finishes leaving yourself and Sue breathless almost. Reed stalks closer, handing his bride a drink and you head over to the bar to get another for yourself before sitting back down again. The buffet will be available soon and you’re desperate for something to eat. Peckish isn’t the word.

“Hello again” Johnny beams and you sip some more wine, a rather big sip yet again before you respond “hello. Are you gonna sit here the whole night?” you question with genuine curiosity, he only really danced a little when the Grease song was on but that’s about it and you aren’t oblivious to the other women checking him out.

“No i intend to dance i just need to be drunk enough for it first”

“I see, maybe then one of those lovely ladies will get a chance to dance with you” you say, observing one in particular who has been staring non stop.

“Please, i’d rather dance with you”

Your heart skips a beat and dare you say it, your vagina develops one. He’s such a sweet talker.

“You looked good out there, y’know” he motions towards the dance floor as if you didn’t already clock on to what he meant and you can’t deny the way your cheeks start to heat up as you thank him shyly.

That’s when he leans closer to your ear, his arm round the back of your chair again as he rasps “and that ass of yours in this dress, baby you got me so hard” his breath fans your neck as he returns to his normal sitting position but he doesn’t miss the way your breath hitches at the dirty comment. He knows all too well the effect he has on you and you know the effect you have on him.

In the past all it’s taken for him is for you to bite your lip and stare him down for him to get hard before. You’re his weakness.

Before you can even go to respond to him though, he clears his throat, tapping away on his phone as he stands up “anyway, if you’ll excuse me, nature calls” he slips his phone back into his pocket, walking away towards the toilets which just so happens to be right behind the DJ.

Your phone buzzes and you check to see a message from him ‘You coming?’ the text reads.

And that alone is enough for you to choke on your own saliva. You quickly sip your drink before standing up yourself and making your way over to the mens toilets. Thank God no one saw you.

“Johnny” you whisper yell until one of the cubicle doors opens, the bigger one at the end. He winks at you as he appears in the doorway and you strut over to him, allowing him to pull you in and lock the door. Your body is flush against his as he starts to kiss your collarbone first. If Johnny is anything it’s a man who loves to savour the moment. He hates quickies and loves to take his time with you.

You’re obviously not the first woman to fall victim to his touch but you’re the only one right now and you’re glad that he’s had experience, it’s clearly made him all the more sensational  in the bedroom.

“Oh” you throw your head back on a quiet moan, hoping not to be too loud despite music blasting outside making it impossible for anyone to hear you.

“Every time you dance, you drive me crazy. Shaking that perfect ass of yours in this dress, making me want you so bad” his lips hover over your sweet spot, his breath fanning it just like it did before.

You wrap your arms loosely round his neck as your back arches and his lips attack your neck like a man possessed, everything about this moment should feel wrong and yet it feels so right. The thought crosses your mind that everyone is out there dancing and most likely eating now all while Johnny is playing with your dress, lifting it up to reveal the new panties that you brought for today. Purple lace to match your dress.

“Oh baby” he groans, tugging on his bottom lip at the sight as his fingers wonder down and slip inside. His cold palm cups your sex making you shiver in surprise before he makes you forget all about it by spinning you around so that you’re pressed against the wall. Caged in by his muscular body as he towers over you.

He presses a chaste kiss to the back of your neck and heat starts to rise to your cheeks, you can’t contain the flustered feeling that fills you. He’s always had a way of being so dominant and stealing all control from you in an instant, since you’re so used to the roles being reversed in your life, he was more than into changing that. And to tell the truth, it’s one of the many reasons that you keep coming back. He pushes you out of your comfort zone in more ways than one.

His fingers play with the flimsy material of your new panties, grazing over your clit multiple times until you’re poking your ass out into his hand. “Someones keen, huh?” his low, raspy and taunting chuckle fills your ear sending shivers up and down your spine and causing goosebumps to form all over your hungry body.

“Please, Johnny” you beg pathetically, once again pushing back against his hand in hopes that he’ll get a move on and touch your properly. Which of course he does. You know he can never resist your charm. All the more reason why he’s slipping your panties to the side now so that his fingers can circle your arousal covered hole, almost dipping into your honey pot but holding back.

“Beg for it” he growls, taking your right earlobe between his teeth and biting down lightly “beg like the good girl i know you are” he continues and you gasp before breathing out a quick plea “p-please touch me Johnny, i need it” as your hands find purchase on the wall.

The feel of his knee spreading your legs apart gets you all the more excited for what’s the come and that’s when he gives you all that you’ve been craving, slipping two thick digits inside of you, coating them in your juices as they hit that spongy spot. He’s never had much trouble when it comes to finding your weak spots, he knows your body inside and out at this point and there’s not a time where you don’t cum when you’re with him.

“That good baby? My fingers getting that little cunt ready for my cock”

Your eyes roll to the back of your head in reaction to the pure filth leaving his not so innocent mouth and just as you go to let out a near enough pornographic style moan, throwing your head back too, the restroom door opens making you stop yourself. Footsteps make their way to one of the cubicles that just so happens to be next to the one your in.

Johnny then takes it upon himself to pull his drenched fingers out of you, reaching his hand in front of your face and shoving them into your mouth for you to suck on, using his free hand to undo his belt and now you know that you’re done for. You know exactly what he’s about to do. His cock rests at your entrance, staying there for a second before he slides in. Your walls welcome him in the best way, wrapping around his cock as he splits you open, stretching you beautifully yet again just like he does every time. The all too familiar feeling consumes you.

“You’d better be quiet if you don’t want to get caught” he mutters in hushed tones, switching it up so that his hand is fully covering your mouth, suffocating you as he drags his cock along your warm velvety walls deliciously. Obviously you don’t want to get caught but right now the anticipation of what could happen is enough to make you clamp down around him, earning a hiss.

A noise that obviously catches the attention of whomever is next door to your cubicle since the unsuspecting gentleman speaks up “are you okay in there, man?” shit. It’s Ben. You feel a wave of shame wash over you as Johnny picks his pace up slowly “yeah, everything's fine” he chirps, as if he has all the time in the world to converse when he’s buried balls deep inside of you.

“If you say so” Ben responds before flushing, washing his hands and then leaving the room. Now it’s just the two of you again. Johnny takes full advantage of the alone time by pushing you right up against the wall, your cheek squished against the tiles, his calloused hands splaying across your ass cheeks now and spreading them apart. Only so he can take a good look at the way he disappears into your tight chanel with ease.

“Doing so well baby, taking this cock like a fucking pro” he grunts, wrapping his hand around your neck and pulling your head back with the help of his other hand grabbing a fistful of your hair at the scalp but keeping your whole body pressed into the wall.

Sinful moans escape your mouth and at this point you’re way past the point of caring or trying to be quiet. Unless someone walks in then you’re going to let go and revel in the feel of him. The way his body traps you in makes your clit pulsate, you love being manhandled and you always have but only by him.

Anyone that takes even so much as a look at Johnny, they think ‘player’ and they’d be right but they’d also think he’d never be the type of man to be as filthy as he is in reality. Not only has he got a foul mouth on him but he’s kinky not to mention skilful in more areas than one. Dick and tongue game on point as well as those magical digits of his and the way they dance across your sex both delicately and brutally all at the same time.

You’re certainly not complaining though. 

“Fuck, Johnny” your back arches even more so than it was before as you shakily cry out his name with the kind of want that only he can spur on “what is it baby?”

“Don’t stop, i’m so close” you whimper desperately.

His pace is now rendering on animalistic as he fucks you into the wall with such vigor, wanting nothing more than to feel you come undone all over his cock, something he’ll never grow tired of.

“Come on then baby, give it to me” he eggs you on, keeping one hand wrapped around your neck still, tightening as the seconds tick by whilst his other hand smacks down on your exposed ass cheek, making it wobble a little which earns him a satisfied hum.

The two of you go crazy with you pushing back to meet his thrusts and him spanking your ass, both of you hungry for that release.

All of a sudden though the blaring music coming from outside stops. Making you panic. Johnny on the other hand is so close to reaching his peak and he knows you are too, so he doesn’t bother to stop.

But you hear the faint laughs of the wedding guests before what sounds like the DJ addressing everyone. Fuck. This better not be the speeches. You had one planned and so did Johnny.

He continues to fuck into you, grunting, growling and panting in your ear, driving you closer and closer to that edge. You can feel the coil twisting and turning in your stomach, on the verge of snapping at any second and you don’t think you’ll be able to hold back the noises when it happens.

“Gonna make you cream all over this cock baby and best believe i’ll be filling this sweet cunt up with my cum”

You rest your hand over his around your neck as your whole body starts to shake. You clench around his cock some more and just as you can taste the orgasm, the addition of his fingers pressing down on your clit push you off the edge and your head drops back onto his shoulder. The music starts up again, allowing you to really enjoy this. Your mouth hangs open whilst you scrunch your eyes closed, seeing stars as you fall into a pit of ecstasy. You can feel your legs shaking and threatening to give way but luckily for you Johnny moves his hands to your waist, wrapping around you so he can hold you up whilst he comes close to reaching his own end.

“Fuckkkkk, squeezing me so good baby”

You do it again for good measure and sure enough, he twitches inside of you, his hot cum painting your walls just like he said and a fucked out spent smile forms on your face making him laugh when he sees.

He rides the two of you through your highs before his thrusts come to a halt and he slowly pulls out. He then grabs some tissues, dropping to his knees and pressing yet another chaste kiss to your clit this time before cleaning you up. He can see that you’re struggling to stand so the second he’s done he rises to his feet, pulling you flush against him and then proceeding to push you up against the wall.

The two of you stare deep into each others eyes for a couple seconds, both of your chests rising and falling as you try to normalise your breathing. That was certainly an adventurous, dangerous and thrilling experience, one that you won’t be rushing to partake in again anytime soon. But it was amazing to say the least. The way he’s looking at you right now makes you want to throw caution to the wind and kiss him. So you do. You crash your lips to his, wrapping your arms loosely around his neck and as expected, he kisses back. His grip tightens on your hips, pulling you even closer if that’s even possible.

“What was that for?” he asks as you come up for air and you shrug, not even sure of what it was yourself. But all you know is you like him and this isn’t just some fling to you, some form of messing around until the two of you get bored. There is a genuine connection there, one that you can’t wait to explore some more.

“I don’t even know” you giggle, pecking his lips again.

Silence falls upon the two of you before he finally blurts out “go out with me” as if he’s telling you rather than asking.

“What?” you furrow your brows in confusion.

“Go out with me, on a date”

“I thought Johnny Storm didn’t do dates” you quip back, raising your brows with a smirk to match “i don’t but i’d like to try if it’s with you” and that alone warms your heart. The same heart that’s been crushed and broken so many times before and it’s almost like he’s mending it. Not that you’re complaining.

You take no longer than a second to think before you’re agreeing and kissing him some more. That’s when the music stops and you both look at each other.

He quickly zips up his pants, doing his belt up again and shrugging his jacket back on before turning back to you. With you both now looking decent again, you get him to check your makeup, he wipes the stray bits of mascara that smudged before kissing your forehead.

He lets you leave first whilst he waits an appropriate 2 minutes before he heads out too. No one suspected a thing and now it’s time for the speeches.

This is definitely going to be a wedding to remember...

---------------------

Me and all my hoe personalities after writing this one: 

General Tags: @deadlymistress24 @coffeebooksandfandom @chris-butt @holtzkinnon @mychemicalimagines @llamadelreyx @haus-of-bitch-talk @buckstaybucky @thewinchestergirl1208 @chrissquares @patzammit @dummiesshort @cevans-fics @americasass91 @toni9 @aaliferous @bradfordmyworld @thereisa8ella @kaminorogers @yassspose @randomsevans 

Just Chris & His Characters Tags: @onetwo3000 @persephonequeenofthedead @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @rynabarnesrogers @princess-evans-addict @stxvercgersslut @chris-evanslover @bval-1 @thejemersoninferno @denisemarieangelina @janeyboo @evansphnx12 @whxre4cevans

LMK if you wanna be added to my tag list...

[edenmemes]

assassin’s creed valhalla starters

words within ‘()’ are additional, optional choices! more maybe to be added at a later date. some n/sfw present. 

❝ you should see the other man. he got the worst of it. ❞   ❝ and who better to lead us to glory than me? ❞ ❝ i am most at home helping others. ❞       ❝ i’ve waited long enough for you, and you for me. ❞   ❝ thank you for not saying anything about my past. ❞       ❝ know that however far away, you’re always in my thoughts. ❞   ❝ when you see your god, tell them i sent you. ❞   ❝ what you make up in muscles, you’re lacking in spine. ❞   ❝ i almost envy you, to see the world through such a muddy glass and live with such petty concerns. ❞   ❝ i smell the stink of a dozen kingdoms in your beard. ❞   ❝ this feud is not yours, yet you fight it all the same. i find that strange. ❞   ❝ by the look on your face, you have lost your will to live. ❞   ❝ my arms are numb from battle. does it need any dressing?    do you think it is a serious wound? ❞   ❝ oh dear. this is not how i foresaw things. not at all! ❞   ❝ should we take this to your chamber? ❞   ❝ i want this. i want you. ❞   ❝ turn around, walk away, and you keep your insides inside. ❞   ❝ stay back! back! i will fight you! ❞   ❝ you look like reddened shit. what happened? ❞   ❝ i have always wanted to experience the world as you do. ❞   ❝ you come like a valkyrie out of a fog. but i have no dead to give you. ❞   ❝ all right, stay close and do as i do. ❞   ❝ home. or...it was home, once. now it is nothing but bone. ❞   ❝ i’ll have no qualms wiping clean your grin. ❞   ❝ just take care. such hatred can make you careless. ❞   ❝ away from your table for a day and you are already lusting for blood. ❞   ❝ if i did not know any better, i would say you are teasing me. ❞   ❝ the dream of new lands is a powerful lure. ❞   ❝ i love climbing up here. makes me feel as high as a raven. ❞   ❝ if i don’t find your horse, i will steal you a new one. ❞   ❝ i feel somewhat trapped. in this room, in this settlement, in this life. ❞   ❝ you are lost in a sea-storm of your own making. ❞   ❝ the poet in you sings once again. ❞   ❝ tonight, we will eat and drink like gods and wake in a kingdom made new. ❞   ❝ i wish i understood you better. for those i do not understand, i do not trust. (and i cannot stomach a lack of trust.) ❞ ❝ i’ve been called worse. ❞   ❝ you have nothing to fear from me. i bear you no ill will. ❞   ❝ you are a shadow of your father. weak and witless. ❞   ❝ what is this? is this...are we in hell? ❞   ❝ keep company with kings and you will soon have a crown of your own. ❞   ❝ a toothless cub may grow to be a dangerous wolf. ❞   ❝ you are far too young to speak so wise. ❞   ❝ i need clear, sound judgement. i need you. ❞   ❝ kind and courageous people live the best lives, but it can be a difficult path to keep. ❞ ❝ i want to say...i love you. and i have for some time. ❞ ❝ you smell that? the stink of jealousy. (of our budding friendship, i think). ❞   ❝ ah, while i have you, i’m reminded...i have this for you. ❞   ❝ your lies are just like you. big and bold. ❞   ❝ don’t excuse yourself. you enjoy this too much. ❞   ❝ you've come back. why are you wasting your time with me? ❞   ❝ care to sing a song? helps me pass the time. ❞   ❝ that is twice you have earned my admiration. ❞   ❝ you have only the setting sun to tell you when to stop. ❞   ❝ i want to know what you know. name your price. ❞   ❝ people like you deserve something worse than death. ❞   ❝ they called me a lout, a disgrace. they were right. ❞   ❝ i will have to get used to watching the sights of war from afar now. ❞   ❝ there’s no other way. fight or hide. it’s up to you. ❞   ❝ do not think me a coward. i am not afraid of war. ❞   ❝ friendships end. often at the point of a spear. ❞ ❝ i will make you beg as your father begged. ❞   ❝ (until that time,) it would be best to keep all discussions about...    about us to yourself. ❞ ❝ without you i would have lost my way a thousand times. ❞   ❝ you have no other friends. so tread lightly here. ❞   ❝ be it a blessing or a curse, family is always first. ❞   ❝ let’s not walk too far with that idea. i need you right where you are. ❞   ❝ you bested me. yet, i’m the one left standing. ❞   ❝ it’s a pleasure to meet you at least. ❞   ❝ you and your people here have done more for me than i could ever repay. ❞   ❝ you have my highest respect, regard, and trust. ❞   ❝ you’re not shy, are you? ❞   ❝ if we do this, you’ll earn the right to call me friend ten-thousand fold. ❞   ❝ does this have the stench of betrayal to you? ❞ ❝ today has meant so much. we rode, we fought, we drank, we laughed. (you showed me your world.) ❞       ❝ your end was written the moment you came for me. ❞   ❝ i am a sellsword. i ask what i please, and i take what i’m owed. ❞ ❝ you move and i will take your eyes. you hear me? ❞   ❝ i will leap first. on my word, you must follow. ❞   ❝ many times i wished to tell you. wished to say what was in my heart and what i desired. (but duty kept me from it.) ❞   ❝ these wounds will heal quickly. you’re lucky. ❞   ❝ anything to help you feel at home. ❞   ❝ our friendship is the best thing to come from this mess. ❞   ❝ you will be remembered for this, for years to come. ❞   ❝ i thought i had lost you. for good this time. ❞   ❝ you have shown me a great kindness. it is only fitting that i do the same. ❞   ❝ the mess you’re in...you don’t know the half of it. ❞   ❝ you have drawn a dark conclusion about me, haven’t you? (that is all well and good. i’ve drawn some about you as well.) ❞   ❝ you seem...strangely familiar. ❞   ❝ here i am, an upright man who never once learned how to bend the knee. and yet...i shall try. ❞ ❝ that’s a bread knife. do you mean to butter me? ❞   ❝ is that not something you worry over? ❞   ❝ a blind pursuit of vengeance has made you predictable. ❞   ❝ no matter where you are, or how far you travel, i will hunt you down. ❞   ❝ i came for you, looking for a friend and ally. ❞   ❝ people change.    it may be that you change with them, or you go your separate ways. ❞   ❝ i wish you whatever peace you may find in this new life you’ve found. ❞   ❝ i want your word: you will follow my orders. ❞   ❝ the day is new, and the air is bracing. are you ready for the fight ahead? ❞   ❝ er...good to meet you as well? ❞   ❝ what riches are worth so much misery, and the deaths of honorable men and women? ❞   ❝ my destiny is mine to weave. ❞   ❝ my road forward has been a muddy one. slick with blood and tears. (but we can reach its end together.) ❞   ❝ it is a wise leader who considers the needs of others. ❞   ❝ i think my mouth has gotten me in enough trouble today. ❞   ❝ at the end of all things, you will find yourself with nothing but your regrets. ❞   ❝ you saw fit to keep me guessing through your fits of madness. ❞   ❝ by all the gods, what was that? ❞   ❝ i was...restless. a quiet walk alone clears the head. ❞   ❝ when winter is past, summer will come and wind you in a flowered skirt, for you are beauty and shall not wither. ❞   ❝ ...unless you had a more interesting day planned for us? ❞   ❝ i do hope you see it now, for all you have done for me. ❞   ❝ your passion, your strength. i have never met such a burning soul. ❞   ❝ i have no guilt nor regret for what we have done, but we should be careful. ❞   ❝ i see before me a person full of passion, vigor, and a love for their people. ❞   ❝ if i wanted to hear you talk shit, i’d cut out your tongue and shove it up your ass. ❞   ❝ you! you look stronger than most of the others. ❞   ❝ your hatred for me burns bright. i could warm my balls on it. ❞   ❝ you’re quite like your arms: incredibly thick. ❞   ❝ i fought as i do, as hard as i do, to survive. (for i know what awaits us in the end. only darkness.) ❞   ❝ a shameful trick. you are your father’s child. ❞   ❝ you destroyed my life. i will take yours. ❞   ❝ you snore a little, like a wounded bear. ❞   ❝ that’s when i knew i would live and die for you. ❞   ❝ i’m going to pretend your last words were taken by the wind. ❞   ❝ i might still kill you yet, if your prattling doesn’t cease. ❞   ❝ you are weak like your father was weak. (you dance better than you fight.) ❞   ❝ have you ever seen muscles as massive as mine? ❞   ❝ i’m honored by your faith in me. and your confidence. ❞   ❝ after my missteps, i worry what you must think of me. ❞   ❝ with so much blood in the water and death in the air, i’d like to know your name and purpose. ❞ ❝ i have a good feeling about this place. ❞   ❝ you helped me reclaim what i had lost in myself. ❞       ❝ you speak of honor. where’s yours? ❞       ❝ you will throw away all reason to defend what you sworn to. ❞       ❝ you really are like a hero out of folk tales. ❞       ❝ how much would you sacrifice to be freed of fate’s shackles? (would you give your tongue, your hand, your sight?) ❞   ❝ there’s no power strong enough to do what you say. ❞       ❝ please, you must fight for me.    who knows what vile people might come to harm me? ❞   ❝ i have no need to count my kills. they number too many. ❞   ❝ i appreciate you for all of your qualities. ❞ ❝ not even the gods can change fate. ❞       ❝ i think it is time i take my leave. ❞ ❝ you really thought my life was in danger? (and you risked your own life...) ❞ ❝ the path ahead is bright, with glory at its end. ❞ ❝ it is easy to lose one's way on the road to glory. do not let false victories blind you to what is true. ❞ ❝ the act of leaving so beloved a home, there is a sadness to it. ❞       ❝ so there’s nowhere...you call home? ❞   ❝ all things end. ruins are not a warning, they are a testament. ❞   ❝ be nice to sleep in a real bed when this is over. ❞   ❝ in my sleep i dream. and in my dreams i see an end to the doom that will grip the earth once again. ❞   ❝ even when we win, we lose. ❞   ❝ i am as good with my lips, as i am with my tongue. ❞   ❝ is this your idea of a pleasant ride through the country? ❞   ❝ no whispering god brought me here. i brought myself. ❞   ❝ i would like very much to pass some time with you. ❞   ❝ ...and that’s how i got that scar. ❞   ❝ do i now haunt your dreams? ❞   ❝ it was never in their character to lead, it was always within yours. ❞   ❝ so easily wounded by words. imagine the ruin my axe would inflict on your flaccid ego. ❞   ❝ i have felt this way for some time now. i care for you. ❞   ❝ i have not felt safe since then. not really. ❞   ❝ how long have you been chasing me? seventeen winters? eighteen? ❞   ❝ you are not always to be trusted. your passions overcome you. ❞   ❝ i like you. you may help me here or step on me...and by the look of you i’d welcome either. ❞   ❝ it is good to have you in this fight. ❞   ❝ you need only know my impressive scale and flawless build. ❞   ❝ i am better than any man here. ❞   ❝ i can tell by looking at you, you are not a great warrior. (you know it too, there is no reason to deny this.) ❞   ❝ i am looking for honor, and have become lost as a result. ❞   ❝ many apologies. you are no child, simply a frail and fully-grown fool. ❞   ❝ i was stupid, selfish, reckless, blind, boneheaded, and i smell like blood and shit. ❞ ❝ anything to say for the mess you led us to? ❞   ❝ how was your...first kill? ❞   ❝ you squirm like that and my axe will miss your neck! unpleasant for both of us. ❞   ❝ i know you would defy me to the death, fighting for a glorious end.     that i will not allow. ❞   ❝ most men choose to be loud or stupid. impressive, that you managed both. ❞   ❝ you are a great warrior. conquerer of this land and that of your birth. ❞   ❝ you’re chasing shadows like a madman howling at the moon! ❞   ❝ quite a hit you took. how many were lost? ❞   ❝ well fought! even if your wits were somewhat rattled. ❞   ❝ we suffered no losses in this fight, and the men who humiliated us are dead. what is there to say? ❞   ❝ i would like to be close to you. ❞   ❝ if you are a warrior with honor running like sunlight in your veins, then you may help me fulfill my destiny. ❞ ❝ you are a long way from any warm hearth, warrior. Is this where you call home? ❞ ❝ am i to go the rest of my days without love or attention? i think not. ❞   ❝ the gods favor you. they always have. ❞   ❝ the others, they are like clubs. blunt and ungainly, you are nimble, like a knife. ❞   ❝ people with eyes that gleam like yours are always up to something more. ❞   ❝ only a fool stays awake all night worrying. you are tired when you get up, and the problem is still not solved. ❞   ❝ i liked you from the first. i saw something in you that captivated me. (as if a forgotten memory of an old friendship had suddenly resurfaced.) ❞   ❝ you've done nothing but give me your blind word! ❞   ❝ did you bring me any treasure? ❞ ❝ the woodsmoke from your firepit does sting the eyes. but the warmth is welcome. ❞ ❝ it is not something i can speak on. or wish to. ❞ ❝ i'm with you. only say the word. ❞ ❝ until we cut off this serpent's head, it will poison us, day by day, drop by drop. ❞ ❝ get some rest and return here at first light. ❞ ❝ i missed having you at my side. how i wished i could have taken you along on my travels. ❞ ❝ i do not like this, but i will not stop you. ❞ ❝ i have waited too many years for this day. when ___ stands before us, give me the final blow. ❞ ❝ why do you carry such a useless burden? let it go. ❞ ❝ i have waited years for this, but i will not risk losing it through rashness. ❞ ❝ i cannot fathom your game. you are either a young fool...or deceptively wise. ❞ ❝ your confidence blinds you to so much in plain sight. ❞   ❝ it’s good to be here, with you and your people. (i feel my life has found a new road.) ❞   ❝ there has always been war, even among the gods. ❞       ❝ my honor has been stained. until it's wiped clean, i want nothing else. ❞ ❝ i lack the patience for pole fishing. i would have better luck with my bow. ❞   ❝ if we tell all our stories, we’ll be here for a week. ❞ ❝ can you teach me the art of archery? ❞   ❝ bury the past. build the future. ❞       ❝ i missed you. your clear head and your courage. (we have not had enough of both in recent months.)   ❞   ❝ i have a good feeling this war is near its end. ❞ ❝ explain in plain words why you have willfully disobeyed my commands. (do you mock me?) ❞   ❝ the gods favor you. they always have. ❞   ❝ my love for you rises tall and strong, like the tree of life. ❞   ❝ the prize is some of my time. (a walk in nature, maybe more if that is where our conversation takes us.) ❞ ❝ together, we are unstoppable. ❞ ❝ it is natural to fear change. to resist it. (but all things change, and all things end.) ❞ ❝ you said nothing of this to me, not a word. ❞ ❝ so long as men and women fight to secure honor and freedom, their allegiance hardly matters to me. ❞ ❝ i care for you. i do not know how to say it any other way. ❞   ❝ love can burn brighter near death. ❞ ❝ i knew this would be difficult, but sometimes the weight bears down heavily. ❞ ❝ you are young and still foolish, so i will spare you your life. (but cross me again or harm anyone i cherish, and you will join your friends in hell.)   ❞ ❝ if you are as brave as you appear, you will come. ❞ ❝ this is not a natural quiet. it's as if a curse has befallen this place. ❞ ❝ there was a curse here long before i came along. ❞ ❝ we’ll forge a warrior from your softness, hammered on the anvil of war. ❞ ❝ you are different than the kind my flights of fancy attract. burdened, decorated and…delicate. ❞ ❝ i do not know what else to say. m-my memories are faint, hazy. ❞ ❝ how are you doing? you survived a serious blow. ❞   ❝ we’ll weave our sagas together, thread upon thread. ❞ ❝ i try to use my knowledge to help others. i am only a threat to those who fear the unknown. ❞   ❝ slap some moss on that gash and wrap it well. ❞   ❝ a knife to the back is a wound that never heals. ❞       ❝ with me you have wisdom! glory! power! what more do you need? ❞       ❝ if your hell is real, i’m glad you’ll get to see it. ❞   ❝ to fight beside such legends is an honor. (i've only heard tales of your conquests. now i get to live them.) ❞   ❝ i have tried to live well. it is enough that the gods know that. ❞ ❝ a cloud hangs over you. is something wrong? ❞   ❝ you have plunged my city into chaos. ❞   ❝ my sword is gore-greedy. i am ready to fight. ❞   ❝ accept your fate and die a coward, here before your people... and i will spare the rest. ❞   ❝ you would take the rescue for yourself, so the victory song is written about you? ❞   ❝ kneel, and i will spare your life. ❞   ❝ it has been some time. what brings you so far to see me? ❞

[the-widow-sisters]

Tracing My Love

Summary: When Yelena is bored one day, Natasha asks Yelena to lay her head on Natasha's lap. Yelena is confused until her sister introduces her to a gentle activity that fully satiates the touch-starved beast within Yelena. Just innocent sister fluff.

Word Count: 2093

  “I’m bored,” Yelena whined, drawing the last word out in a much too dramatic fashion. She could feel Natasha’s gaze upon her as she looked up from the book that she had stuffed her nose into.

  “Go for a run,” Natasha suggested, and Yelena shook her head from her position on the other side of the couch, just groaning loudly.

  “It’s too hot and miserable for that,” Yelena informed her, looking at her older sister and taking in the unhidden grin spreading across the redhead’s face.

  “You could get one of those nasty slushie things you like,” Natasha spoke, and Yelena scoffed immediately in reply.

  “The store is not open on Sundays. Besides, the slushies are a delicacy. Second only to vodka,” Yelena informed her, and Natasha just grinned a bit wider, a laugh rising in her throat, and Yelena felt quite satisfied with herself for bringing such emotion to the redhead.

  “So that must be why you like them,” Natasha suddenly piped up in response. Yelena shifted her gaze to her in slight confusion.

  “What?” Yelena asked, suspicion in her voice as she noted how smug and pleased that Natasha sounded with herself. She had to admit that it was quite nice to have the privilege of hearing Natasha’s voice in such a pleasing, happy tone.

  “You must be mixing vodka in so you can’t taste the actual slushie,” Natasha told her, keeping her voice perfectly level, and Yelena narrowed her eyes a little in a playful glare. Natasha’s light greens were sparkling with mirth as she glanced up from the book.

  “Ha,” Yelena just faked a short bark of laughter.

  “There’s food in the kitchen,” Natasha suggested, and Yelena just pouted a little in response to the statement.

  “There is no sour cream and onion chips,” Yelena shot down her sister’s proposal,

  “I bought some for you yesterday.”

  “Yeah, about that… I finished the bag yesterday,” Yelena admitted with a slight grin, completely unashamed of her feat, and Natasha’s eyes widened a little

  “Seriously?!” Natasha questioned, some surprise in her voice as she looked up from her novel once again to gaze at Yelena.

  “What?! I’m a growing girl, you know!” Yelena defensively declared, and Natasha just shook her head with mock disappointment.

  “If you keep downing a whole bag of potato chips all at one time, you’re going to grow. Not sure if you’re going to like how you do, though,” Natasha commented, raising her eyebrows.

  Yelena brought her foot up, gently kicking Natasha’s arm that was holding up the book. However, she overdramatically did it, so it looked like she was putting more effort into it than she actually was. Natasha skillfully kept her hold on the book, just trading hands as she kept reading.

  Yelena groaned before scooting over closer to Natasha, her eyes locked onto the side of Natasha’s face. She eased ever nearer to the redhead, and she finally was close enough to rest her chin on Natasha’s shoulder as she lazily raked her gaze over the words inside the book, not truly reading any of it. Natasha raised an eyebrow, craning her neck slightly and looking down at the blonde.

  Yelena just shifted her honey-green eyes upward to meet Natasha’s.

  “What are you reading?” Yelena questioned curiously, and Natasha huffed a little. She delivered a swift, soft kiss to the center of Yelena’s forehead before looking back down at the book.

  “Probably nothing you’re going to find interesting.”

  “Try me,” Yelena challenged, and Natasha simply looked down at the younger girl with blatant skepticism evident in her stare.

  “I will have you know that I am very educated in the world of literary… ness,” Yelena proclaimed, her voice a little uncertain despite the bravado she forced into it. Natasha just chuckled fondly, shaking her head a little.

  “It’s Gone with the Wind,” Natasha told her, and Yelena wrinkled her nose with disgust. She tilted her head, trying to get a better look at the cover. She scoffed as she spotted a man and a woman on the front in a loving embrace.

  “Are you sure this is appropriate reading material?” Yelena asked, trying and failing to hold back the laugh in her voice. Natasha raised an eyebrow with slight confusion, not exactly understanding Yelena’s mirth.

  “Yeah. Why wouldn’t it be?”

  “It looks like it has some… adult themes,” Yelena suggestively spoke, waggling her eyebrows ridiculously, and Natasha finally flipped the book to actually take the time to look at the cover. She quickly caught on, just laughing at the younger girl. Yelena chuckled but awaited an answer.

  “No, no, none of that. Just pure romance. Not anything too out there.”

  “Ick. Sounds sappy,” Yelena blew her off, her chin still resting on Natasha’s shoulder heavily, and she noticed out of her peripheral vision that Natasha was rolling her eyes in reply to her.

  “Natashka, I’m bored,” Yelena drew the words out tiredly, unable to think of anything she wanted to do and hoping that her awesome big sister would think of something. Natasha finally put down the book on the table nearby, pursing her lips ever so slightly as she grew lost in thought.

  After a painstakingly long moment of this, Natasha seemed almost as if she had settled upon something or came to some conclusion or another. She looked at Yelena and shifted slightly so that Yelena would raise her head from its place on her shoulder. Yelena felt the need to complain about the loss of her comfy place, but she held her tongue, curious as to what Natasha was coming up with.

  Natasha looked at her for a long moment before finally speaking.

  “Lay down,” Natasha patted her lap, and Yelena started to do it without question, eager to take advantage of her sister’s offered affections. However, she quickly paused in the middle of her movements, looking at Natasha skeptically.

  “Wait… Why?” Yelena asked, and Natasha rolled her eyes fondly, nothing but warmth in her eyes.

  “Just do it,” Natasha told her, and Yelena hesitantly complied, not sure what to expect but trusting Natasha nevertheless. She was not sure if she was being lured into a tickle trap so she carefully kept her arms clamped to her sides once her head was in Natasha’s lap.

  “Relax. No tickle fights,” Natasha assured her, and Yelena loosened, hearing the genuineness in the redhead’s voice. She hesitantly slid her arms up so that they were resting on either side of her head and across Natasha’s lap.

  To her surprise, Natasha rolled up the back of her shirt, and Yelena stiffened just barely. She quickly loosened up, though, trusting Natasha wholeheartedly. Before she could ask what the older woman was doing, she suddenly felt feather-light touches raking across her back gently.

  She almost shivered from the feeling, and her eyes were open wide as Natasha’s digits tickled barely along her back, tender across her skin.

  “I’m going to trace a word on your back, and you’ve got to tell me what it is,” Natasha explained, her voice soft and quiet, and Yelena just nodded barely, worried that if she even breathed wrong that the attentions would stop. The ministrations were unlike anything she had ever felt, and it made her mind completely overload with the sensations of the most trusted person in her life touching her so lovingly and so gently.

  Y-E-L-E-N-A.

  Natasha stopped once she had spelled it out, and it took Yelena a painfully long moment to respond to the redhead as she tried to get her thoughts back in order from the overwhelmingly kind touches.

  “Yelena,” Yelena answered softly, finding herself eager for the next word that would be traced if only to feel Natasha’s gentle fingers running across her back.

  “Good job,” Natasha softly praised, and Yelena felt her chest constricting with something that was so purely the love of an adoring little sister that thought her older sister’s praise was as valuable as the air she breathed. Of course, she would never admit this to herself, but it nevertheless was an emotion that was coursing through every fiber of her being.

  “Two words this time,” Natasha explained quietly, and Yelena almost impatiently awaited her sister’s tender touches.

  S-W-E-E-T.

  G-I-R-L.

  “Sweet girl?” Yelena asked, almost embarrassed as she uttered one of Natasha’s special nicknames for her.

  “That’s it,” Natasha quietly agreed, and Yelena felt herself melting even further with the love in her voice.

  It was all that Yelena had ever wanted in her life. She had just wanted her sister’s affection, approval, and love. While she felt ridiculous on one hand for finding such satisfaction and pure happiness from a silly game like this, on the other hand it was something she craved deeply.

  Natasha soon started writing again.

  L-A-P-O-C-H-K-A.

  “Lapochka,” Yelena affirmed, feeling a slight smile coming to her face, and Natasha chuckled warmly.

  “Thought I’d switch languages and make it a little more complicated,” Natasha told her, and her voice was filled with nothing but affection. Yelena felt herself inflating a little with the loving, proud tone in Natasha’s voice. She knew she had really accomplished nothing significant, but it was still a huge deal to her that Natasha approved even of something as dumb as guessing a word right.

  Natasha traced another word on her back, and Yelena concentrated on it carefully.

  “Rooskaya,” Yelena acknowledged, and Natasha swept a hand across her back as if she were erasing the word. Yelena closed her eyes, enjoying the contact from someone that she trusted so deeply.

  “I,” Yelena read once Natasha wrote and paused for a while. It was confusing to her, and she did not know what exactly Natasha meant by just one letter.

  Natasha swept a hand across her and started again. Yelena furrowed her brow as she felt the letters across her back.

  “Love,” Yelena spoke, and Natasha started writing again, her finger moving carefully along Yelena’s skin.

  “You,” Yelena finished, and she quickly realized that Natasha had written her a message. Goosebumps covered Yelena’s back, and Yelena moved her head so that her chin was on top of Natasha’s leg. She looked up at the redhead, feeling her heart overflowing with pure adoration. Natasha was looking down at her softly, her eyes warm with care.

  Yelena felt her lips tugging down at the corners just a little, and she valiantly fought the tears of love, happiness, and awe that were threatening to come over her. She moved a bit closer to Natasha, burying her face into the redhead’s stomach and wrapping her arms around Natasha’s waist slowly and tightly.

  She ordinarily would not have cried at her sister telling her that she loved her, but somehow, this time felt so much more meaningful. It was through that physical contact and affection that Yelena so craved and needed, and the fact that Natasha had somehow combined verbal and physical methods to tell her how she felt was almost more than Yelena could take.

  “Ya tebya lyublyu, Natashka,” Yelena spoke against Natasha, and Natasha ran her fingers through Yelena’s hair before gently pulling Yelena’s shirt back down over her back.

  “Ya tozhe tebya lyublyu, milaya devushka,” Natasha reciprocated, and Yelena just pressed herself against Natasha harder, feeling her body as it moved with her breaths.

  After a long moment of this and when Yelena was sure she could trust her voice again, she pulled away from Natasha and rolled over so that she was laying on her back with her head in Natasha’s lap.

  “Wait… Isn’t it your turn?” Yelena questioned softly with a slight quirk of her eyebrow, trying to convey more chill about this whole thing than she was really feeling. Natasha chuckled a little, reciprocating the eyebrow raise.

  “Sure,” Natasha replied easily, and Yelena sat up from her place in Natasha’s lap and straightening her legs on the couch so that Natasha could lay across her. Yelena just watched her expectantly, and Natasha smiled softly before laying her head down in Yelena’s lap carefully, her arms brought up so that her hands could gently hold onto Yelena’s leg.

  Yelena softly pulled back Natasha’s shirt and looked down at the slightly scarred canvas before her. She quietly thought for a moment before a wicked smirk came onto her face. She began to trace the word.

  Natasha was quiet for a moment, and Yelena finally reached the last letter, waiting eagerly for Natasha’s response. Sure enough, Natasha quickly caught on, and she spun on her side, looking up at Yelena with mock offense.

  “Poser?!”

  Yelena just cackled.

[liptonsbabe]

Remember me [F.O]

Finnick Odair x female! reader

Chapter 1, Chapter 2

Summary: Something’s different at the Capitol. All victors must return to their respective districts within the week. Snow’s orders. Nobody can oppose and Finnick has a bad feeling about that

Word count: 1.5K

Warnings: none

English not my mother language so pls tell me if something’s wrong

Chapter 2: Homecoming

The morning feels different, as if something has changed right off the bat; the air feels less heavy and I feel less exhausted.

The sun's rays stream through the window and I shiver as I feel Finnick's strong arms pulling me tight against him; he’s bothered by the sun too. I smile and place my hands over his.

“Finnick, close the curtains”

“What? Why me?”

“You're closer to the window than me”

“And your point is...?”

I try to get up and Finnick stops me. He laughs over my shoulder without letting me make another move.

“Leave them like that. Don't get up”

“I want to go back to sleep," I tell him, "We didn't get enough rest last night”

Finnick's face scrunches up, but then returns to normal, wearing a bright smile. He pulls me to him and hugs me

“But it was a good night, wasn't it? At least it was for me. I got the best news in the world”

“Sure, it was”

I try to smile, but worry don't let me. I feel a weight off since last night, but the situation makes my hair stand on end. what would happen when Snow found out i’m pregnant? He hates me to death and he would do everything to make me suffer

It all starts years ago, in my games. It was an important year, the games were organized as a special event for President Snow's birthday, everything had to go perfectly. I was chosen in the reaping along with Derek, my District partner.

Arriving at the Capitol people always have a favorite and Derek was theirs. With hundreds of sponsors raining down on his shoulders and hundreds more female fans who would surely help him. Finnick was one of the few people -along with Maggs, Annie, Johanna and Haymitch- who helped me survive in that place.

Sometimes Gamemakers can be too stupid. On the last nights of the games, Derek had died, unleashing the anger and discontent of most of the country, leaving me with all the pressure of at least being the last to die.

I reached a cliff, a boy from District twelve was following my steps to the top. I was cornered. In an instant of carelessness, the sword I was carrying fell into the cliff and seconds later, it came back to me.

It was a force field, and I used it to my advantage.

That annoyed them very much cause, according to them, with my indiscipline I ruined President Snow’s birthday

Up to this point Snow hasn't deigned to make me pay for that, but I don't deny the fact that he wants to do it later, like now he wants to get revenge on that girl from district twelve who did her little berry trick with her partner. And when Finnick and I started a relationship, he was the first to congratulate us on such a good decision.

Snow is still pissed at me, I can tell by the scandalous looks he sends me every year in the mentor room where we watch our boys fight for their lives. I sense it when he tries to approach me when Finnick walks away, but comes back immediately after when he sees the intentions Snow has for me. And it's not like he can take it out on anyone in my family. I have no one left but Finnick

Finnick's fingers rest on my shoulder and he gently caresses it, trying to make my sudden cloud of unease dissipate.

“We're going to be fine”

“I haven't said otherwise. I just know it won't be what you'd call easy. Snow hates me”

“I know a lot of things about him that he won't want the whole country to know," he says, sitting down on the bed with me following his movements.

“That business of secrets again," I say rolling my eyes, "I hate to think of the way you got them.

“That was before I met with you” He swears with a little smile. I tap him on the shoulder

“You better”

Later in the day Johanna arrives at our house laden with some packages wrapped in newspaper. I help her place them on the table and Finnick goes to the kitchen to get something to drink. We sit together in the living room and Johanna starts questioning me.

“I guess you've told him the news already, haven't you?” I nod and she takes my hands “So, how did he take it?”

“He took it well. Surprisingly well. I told him yesterday in a... not so good situation” Johanna raises an eyebrow waiting for me to continue “He got upset when I went to the bathroom during the night”

My friend from district seven laughs out loud, infecting me with her effusiveness. She denies as she laughs and looks at me unable to contain herself.

“I think Finnick has become more stupid than he already was”

“What?”

He comes up to us and puts the tray of drinks on the coffee table. Johanna takes the drink and takes a sip.

“Nothing, nothing," says Johanna, "We were talking about how shity is to live in here, right?”

“Johanna..." Finnick mumbles back, knowing they could hear us. She shrugs her shoulders

“What? your depressed faces tells me so. I don't blame you, though. I'd rather go back to those damn games than live here”

“Be careful what you ask for," Finnick says, sitting down next to me.

“As if that's even damn possible”

Johanna slams her drink and leaves the empty glass on the table, she licks her red lips and turns back to us.

“I just stopped by to see how you were doing and to give you some news”

“What news?”

“Oh, I guess you're going to love this”

“What is it” Asks Finnick desperately. Johanna smiles

“Well, I think that Snow's cold is already getting old. He's even more stupid than usual” Finnick tenses at her words and I take his hand to calm him down “Anyway, the thing is that this morning he has given the order for all the mentors that are in this hell to return to their District”

Finnick and I jump up excited and stunned by the news. He looks at me and I return the gesture by squeezing his hands.

“What are you talking about, Johanna?”

“About that thing you heard, love bird” She stands up and stands in front of us “The old man has given us permission to return to our home. Can you believe it?”

The small sense of relief I feel dissipates as soon as his words make sense. I am overwhelmed by such a sudden surprise and by the fact that after some time we’ll return home.

“I guess you guys have a lot to talk about. I'm leaving, Blight is waiting for me” She rolls his eyes and walks towards the door. Before leaving he turns to us with a raised eyebrow “Your train leaves tomorrow at eight o'clock. Good luck”

The echoing of the door floods the room, but we are both too immersed in uncertainty to let it pass. Finnick turns me toward him and grabs me by the arms.

“We can go back. We'll go back," he says, excitement overflowing from his pores. I nod and without knowing why, I'm worried about going back to the district.

.

Maggs smiles at me as he sees me enter the train with Finnick. I take a seat next to him and he immediately takes my hands.

“Hi Maggs” I stroke her face and she smiles even more. She puts a hand on my belly and then looks at Finnick out of the corner of her eye ”Yes, Maggs, I told him already”

My former mentor pats my stomach and that's when Annie Cresta appears. Her eyes are downcast and her long hair looks disheveled and brittle. Maggs looks at her with sorrow and I invite her to sit with us.

“How are you, Annie?” She doesn't answer and her gaze is lost in the train. For a minute she looks at me and then she starts crying.

“I want to go home. I don't want to go back. I don't want to”

“You won't. Calm down”

Annie leans against my shoulder and I hug her so she can calm down. After a few minutes she falls asleep on me and I hold her until we reach the shore.

Finnick helps me wake her up and get her off the train with Maggs in front of us. As the hatches open the saltiness of the water floods my nostrils. The fishermen are doing their work and the women are making nets for their husbands to lure the fish to the shore.

I take another breath  and the smell of our district food fills my heart and drives away the worry that has settled in me since yesterday.

I’m back

I’m at home

[myevilmouse]

Hello there!! 😍💙

May I ask 💰 💡 💋 for the Fanfic Ask Game?

🤗PS Have a nice weekend!😊

Thank you so much for the ask @ele-millennial-weirdo!! These were a lot of fun! I appreciate the distraction--and it definitely is contributing to a nice end of my weekend (which hasn't been particularly great 💙).

💰 What’s one trope you wouldn’t write, except for money?

When I read this question, the first thing that came to mind was EASILY mpreg. It just shot into my brain at hyperspeed, as like yeah no thank you. So I had to make sure it counted as a trope because sometimes I still feel like I'm learning in this crazy fanfic world 😁 But yeah, I am squicked by all things pregnancy in RL and DEF don't have any interest in writing a pregnant Luke or Thrawn but but but if someone was going to pay me to do it, I might be able. I can just imagine it now: the phone rings...I don't recognize the number. It's Kathleen Kennedy on the other end of the line: EVILMOUSE, she breathes in her best 'we're gonna please the investors' voice, THE GALAXY NEEDS MPREG and YOU HAVE TO WRITE IT! Here's a blank check. Now go make Luke impregnate his clone or something. And I, trying so hard not to tarnish the legacy of my favorite Jedi, succumb to the lure of Disney Dollars. "It's all fanfic anyway," I tell myself, "and it'll really be Jake and not Luke shhh." Mark Hamill supports me completely, and we commiserate over blue milk backstage at Galaxy's Edge when my screenplay debuts, with Max Lloyd Jones playing opposite Sebastian Stan because they decided why the hell not give the fans what they want for change, completely missing the point.

Oh my that got long. But yeah, mpreg. No kink shaming, just very much not my thing.

💡 What’s the weirdest thing you’ve been inspired by?

While it’s not weird in general to be inspired by music, I’m going to have to say the weirdest thing I’ve been inspired to write was instigated by @ap-trash-compactor who mentioned a Billy Joel song in passing on the Thryce Discord as having Thryce vibes and my psychotic muse went off on a Sunday afternoon bender, resulting in Thryce:  The Musical, using all Billy Joel songs and inspired by her fic A Dealer In Hope.  For more on that madness you can ready my Trivia Tuesday about it here, and despite having only 14 kudos, I still am proud of it.  It’s insane and it was made for an audience of two (me and my sister who loves Billy Joel and knows nothing about Thryce) so that’s 14 kudos more than I expected 💙 

💋 Fuck marry kill 3 of your own fics (asker’s choice of fics).

I love this question, an excellent exercise, and since you didn’t give me three fics, I get to pick them myself!  

Fuck:  COPY THAT.  I mean, it’s a Luke Skywalker AND his four clones gangbang, I just can’t imagine anything better (or I would have written that instead lol).  With all those hunks around, I can share with Mara, no problem.  Definitely the most fuckable of my fics.

Marry:  Oh I would marry any of my Luke fics--he’s such a dream--but I guess I am going to go with COMFORTABLE, which is an old married Skywalkers one-shot and it makes me warm and fuzzy inside.  I’m answering this not from like the fic that is my fave POV, but the fic that would give me the best happy ever after to live in it/marry it, and this is definitely it. Master Skywalker is wonderful (and hot).

Kill:  I love all my fics (or else why write ‘em?!) but perhaps the one I’m least attached to on a personal level is PROXY, which is my Ventress/Luke.  It was written because I have an ongoing mission of Luke x All The Ladies and I am quite fond of Ventress, plus we had the Luke Deserves All The Blowjobs Challenge.  So...Yeah.  A lot of reasons to write it.  And I like it OK but it’s the one that would be least upsetting if it got killed.  Goodbye, loving descriptions of Luke’s *cough* mansaber and overused pronouns!

This was a wonderful distraction and I am grateful to you for it!  I hope you have a wonderful weekend too @ele-millennial-weirdo!  Sorry these answers were sort of light on our evil blue stud 💙😘

Anyone else want to ask? The list is here.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed, Episode 01

(Masterpost) (Next Episode)

Warning: This is **FULL **of spoilers, not just for this episode but for the entire series. If you haven’t finished all 50 episodes, please don’t read it! 

Intro: 2020 continues to be much much too much while also being incredibly boring, and Im done with Shen Wei’s Lewks, so now I’m doing a deep meta dive into the Untamed. Let’s roll! 

Prologue: The Battle of Mordor

The Demise of our Protagonist

Unlike some other shows I won’t name, The Untamed kills its suicidal queer protagonist immediately, rather than waiting four seasons, so we know what we're in for. 

This is Wei Wuxian, who is about to yeet himself off of a cliff. He is having a bad day. 

Note: if mouth blood bothers you...C-Drama might not be your thing. 

Reasons for mouth blood: a sampler

Anyway...cliff time

Note: if (fictional) suicide bothers you...C-Drama might not be your thing. 

To be fair there are hardly any suicides in The Untamed. No more than ...five? As long as you don’t count the entire population of the Wen Corporate Headquarters in Yiling or those wall bandits in Qinghe or Madame Yu or all those Wens who supposedly threw themselves into the mud puddle or that Mo guy who broke his own neck. Plus watching Wei Wuxian’s cliff drop several more times from multiple angles. So, you know. Hardly Any Suicides. 

This is Lan Wangji, who is about to have his first losing encounter with physics. He is having a bad day.

In fact, if it is possible to have a worse day than the guy who is currently falling to his death, Lan Wangji is having that.

This is Jiang Cheng, who is feeling extra stabby from this camera angle. He is having a bad day.

Camera operator: why you gotta take it out on me? 

(Much, much more after the cut!)

The Amulet Situation

This is the Stygian Tiger Amulet. Yes, by all means, (Netflix) subtitles, let's use a 12-dollar word, “Stygian,” that every English speaker who is not a Shelley/Byron shipper will have to look up. Let’s not use a normal word like "deathly" or "corrupt" or you know... "Yin" which is clearly what they are saying on screen.

Why does this tiger amulet look like a chameleon crossed with a remora? Wei Wuxian can paint photorealistic bunnies on a flimsy lantern while sitting in a field having distracting teenage lust, but two months of meditating with super magic gets him a tiger that looks like a chameleon. And don’t try telling me this is a traditional-Chinese-art vibe because this jade tiger from frickin 1000 BCE is way more tigerish than Wei Wuxian’s attempt. 

Try harder next time, Wei Wuxian.

This is thousands of cultivators having a battle.  What do you mean, it looks like about 40-60 dudes?

 Any time someone in The Untamed refers to a number of people, it is like when you do your high school play and look off into the wings at nothing and say “Hark, A Ship Approaches!” and everyone’s parents nod indulgently.

Jin Clan Mountain Hunt:

*viewership nods indulgently*

This is Captain Blowhard, over on the right, courtesy name Clan Leader Yao. His job is to talk smack about Wei Wuxian and stick up for whoever is the biggest asshole in any given scene.  

He represents mainstream cultivation-world values so here he is shanking one of his allies to take the deadly amulet of evilness.

The Present Day

Spilling All That Yiling Laozu Tea

Down at the Exposition Tea Shop, the Lan juniors are chilling and listening to Tea Dude tell the story of Yiling Laozu. 

How did they get permission to take this field trip? “Principal Qiran, we want to go downtown to hang out with the local rabble and learn about your favorite person, Wei Wuxian.”

Waiting in the wings is the man with a fan and a plan, Nie Huaisan(g), who is paying tall loot to get these stories told.  

...Why? Is Mo Xuanyu having tea here and listening? Or is Wei Wuxian being summoned back by hearing all this smack being talked about him? *Shrug.*

Gank Your Soul

Drunk flag guy out here talking about spirits. Wikipedia tells me that In one school of Daoist thought, a human being has a collection of physical souls (魄 pò) and ethereal souls (魂 hún). Drunk flag guy is saying “hún ” at the moment. 

The many types of souls don’t translate well into English, where spiritual vocabulary has always been shackled connected to Christian beliefs, and is too limited for this context. So when the subtitles have conversations like “Is it a soul eater? No, no, it’s a spirit taker!” just roll with it. (Speaking of hún, if you have any interest in linguistics, do yourself a favor and go read all the wonderful meta @hunxi-guilai​)

The spirit-carrying flag looks a lot like Raava and Vaatu from Korra which...probably doesn’t mean anything.

The Demise of our Trill Host

Suicide #2 happens about 8 minutes in. 

Mo Xuanyu is that hippie roommate with the annoying wind chimes and bead curtains and blood spatter.

He is super mad at his terrible family and also at Jin Guangyao, who sent him home to his terrible family. I wonder if Fan Man Nie Huaisang influenced Jiggy’s decision-making there. Mo Xuanyu’s choice to die for revenge might be excessive, given how easy it actually is to murder the Mo family.

Being Alive Is Fine I Guess As Long As I Get To Fuck WIth People

Wei Wuxian starts his new life by splashing a little water on his face, which instantly makes his hair go from this

to this. 

He looks at his reflection and wishes he was dead, which--mood--but he gets over it as soon as he finds someone whose day he can fuck up.

And he is ALL in on being crazy. 

OP wishes she had the Wei Wuxian kind of crazy instead of the kind she actually has. 

Meanwhile, this is the sane Mo cousin:

This asshole is wearing one of the best fabrics in the whole show, incidentally. Asshole.

My favorite bit of Wei-Mo craziness is when Wei Wuxian does a meaningless 360 all the way around this dude before ducking in the opposite direction, which is like when I make 4 right turns around a whole block to avoid making a single left across traffic.

Perhaps I Do Miss One Thing In This Life

Wei Wuxian has pining thoughts about Lan Wangji, so he plays WangXian on a fucking blade of grass well enough for Sizhui to recognize it from his dad's guqin jams. 

Wei Wuxian is a better flautist than even Inspector Gadget BeatBoxing Flute Guy (Google it).

Our Many Many Spirit Lure Flags have Lured A Spirit, Oh Shit

Lan Clan has a Plan and Wei Wuxian is a Fan

Having one single lure flag stuck in Wen Ning’s torso caused spirits to basically eat him alive, so to catch one evil spirit, 6 disciples holding flags on the roof plus 8 more flags on the ground seems like a good amount. Wei Wuxian is like “yep, a single one of these will lure every spirit for five miles, carry on, younglings.”

Baxia Does the Heavy Lifting

Wei Wuxian is supposed to kill four people because of this curse situation, and in the course of the series they all die, and he kills exactly zero of them. The curse on Wei Wuxian’s arm should be called the scorekeeper curse. 

Baxia’s spirit pinballs around the Mo clan, rapidly killing three people on Mo Xuanyu’s list plus a couple extras for good measure.  Who's a good blade? Baxia is! Yess you are! Yes you are!

This here is the exact point in the show where your friend, who has listened to you squee about The Untamed for three months and finally agreed to watch it with you, will say “what the fuck am I watching?” and try to get up off the couch. Tackle them! 

This also the point where we all realize that the prosthetic and practical effects in this show were probably not made by the people who made the clothing, because the quality is...variable. The white eyeballs are pretty good, but the glove of death is ridiculous.

Camera operator: why you gotta take it out on me?

While Baxia goes to town on the Mo clan, the Lan Clan babies...watch? And tie up the various victims after they are already goners. 

Narrator: Her son is dead.

Meanwhile, 

Wei Wuxian, you motherfucker. You’ve been alive for like 7 hours and you’re already building a new zombie army. No wonder you don’t want them to call Lan Wangji.

Hanguang-Jun Cut It Up One Time

Lan Wangji shows up and very slowly kicks zombie ass with his guqin. If you are used to Hong Kong action speeds, you will find The Untamed very peaceful.

 All of the baby Lans fan squee up at Lan Wangji like he's the cultivation world's David Bowie and...they're not wrong. Jesus Fuck, he’s charismatic.

Lan Wangji is soft boi when he discovers this murderous sword full of dead-bastard energy, because it reminds him of his true love.

Like the talk about souls, the conversations about the nature of the murderous entity really don’t survive translation into English.

Servant: it’s a ghost! 

WWX: it’s not a ghost, it’s a spirit

Babies: It’s a spirit

LWJ: it’s not a spirit, it’s a [...] ghost

Our Protagonist gets the FOH

Wei Wuxian is soft boi when he sees Lan Wangji, but not so soft that he considers actually, like, sticking around. 

Wei Wuxian is also clueless boi, noting Lan Wangji’s white clothing and thinking, as in the past, that he looks like he’s dressed in mourning. The term he uses is 戴孝, which google tells me means the type of outfit worn by Jiang Yanli after Wen Ning rips her husband’s heart out someone who is in mourning. 

Actually, Wei Wuxian, you dumbass, he is in actual mourning, actually, for you. Dumbass. He probably packed away all of his blue outer robes 16 years ago and only takes them out occasionally to reminisce about that nice date you had on your mountain of corpses. 

On his way out the door Wei Wuxian manages to find a red ribbon for his beautiful hair, so things are looking up. 

Where to go next...hey I know, how about that one haunted mountain with the killer statue, you know, the one that all my executed friends and child came from? That’ll be fun and a great way to put the past behind me!

Episode 02 Restless Rewatch is here!

[aereres]

Loving You Was A Mistake - Elias Lindholm | Rock Band AU

Summary: Elias was trouble, Amelia could tell from the moment they had first met. With his flirty smile, stormy eyes that brought crowds of girls to his feet, and a cocky personality, he was the last person Amelia wanted to deal with. But with alcohol flowing through her system, she had never been the one to make good decisions.

A/N: I kinda like how this fic turned out, and I hope you’ll enjoy it too!

Word Count: 12,6k

Warnings: SMUT, drinking, anxiety and panic, heartbreak, swearing

“Rum and coke,” Elias yelled over the loud rhythm of the music he hated - the music he listened to almost every night. The bartender spared him a quick look, nodding his head as he registered the order before leaving the guitarist on his own to look at the thick mass of dancing bodies in the middle of the dance floor.

Elias Lindholm had been the party scene ever since High School, in search of fun, girls, alcohol, and drugs. It was who he had grown up to be, no shame in what he loved to do, and his rise to fame truly didn’t change his lifestyle: in some way, it made his nightly adventures even better.

There was a moment before a manicured hand grasped his arm, grabbing his attention. His charming smile appeared on his lips without an order, and he was left to face the smaller girl who had touched him with hungry eyes.

“Looking for something, sweetheart?” Elias said, enjoying the way her hands slid from his bicep to his chest.

“A man to spend the night with,” her words were said in his ear, her sweet voice not as sensual as he had hoped it would be. His light eyes searched for hers, a hint of sexual tension filling the air as he put his needs before everything else. He wasn’t going to refuse a night of sex, especially if it was with someone as hot as the girl in front of him.

“A man to spend the night with,” he repeated, smirking as he let his hand ghost the curve of her ass. “I can work with that,”

The girl smirked too, lips slowly inching closer to his as the music surrounding them subsided. He was left to kiss her hungrily, not a care in the world that he was in the middle of a packed club. Elias just kissed her, trying to lure her to his bed, just like he did every night.

He pulled away just when he couldn’t bear it anymore, turning around to take a sip of his drink. Except, it wasn’t his drink. Dry martini was burning his throat as his flushed face took a look of disgust, his eyes roaming around to find the bartender in search of an explanation.

All he was faced with, though, was another face of disgust, pretty lips pulled in a pout as the girl next to him swore. “Fucking hell,”

The liquid inside her glass was dark, and Elias could only guess she had taken a blind swig of the alcohol - just like he had done. “Where’s my martini?”

Elias smirked as he forgot about the girl he had just kissed, taking a seat next to his new companion as he switched their drinks confidently. “There you go,”

The woman next to him turned around with her features tugged in a frown, hands moving quickly as she pushed the glass of martini back to him. “There’s no way I’m drinking that. You just exchanged spit with that chick, man,”

Elias chuckled, jaw clenching as he gave the new stranger in front of him a once-over. Her dress was tight against her skin, red lipstick sticking out even under the dark lights of the club. She was breathtaking, and the girl from a few minutes prior was already more than forgotten. She was part of the past, the woman in front of him was the present.

“Looking for someone to dance with?” He asked smugly, finger ghosting over the rim of his glass, the print of her lipstick still coloring one side.

“You definitely wouldn’t be that someone,” the woman stated, signaling for the bartender to come closer, ordering another glass of dry martini.

“Put it on my check,” Elias said, ignoring the woman’s annoyed groan. His eyes went back to her, smirk still painting his lips. “What do I have to do to learn your name, sweetheart?”

The woman laughed ironically, eyebrows arching as she took a good look at him. “You think I’d be interested in you? Very funny,”

“We both know you’ll end up in my bed, by the end of the night,”

Elias’ words made the woman scoff, eyes rolling as she grabbed the new glass of martini the bartender had just passed her. “Keep telling yourself, scout,” she hummed, tipping her head back and taking a large gulp of the drink. “I got better things to do than to sleep with an egocentric asshole,”

Elias just smirked, his stubbornness making his body light up on fire as he watched her stand up from her stool. He was going to have her. “I’ll see you later, sweetheart,”

“The name is Amelia,” she hissed his way, looking behind her shoulder. “Just so you can stop using those basic pet names on me,”

“Elias,” he smirked, watching her hips sway as she left his side, disappearing behind the tall wall of people on the dance floor. Elias was left to himself as he looked down at his drink, a grin forming on his lips as his new acquaintance stayed on his mind.

Amelia was still scoffing as she headed for the dance floor, hips automatically swaying to the rhythm of the music as she found a spot in the middle. She felt numerous eyes on her as she danced, hands feeling her body up as she pushed the tension off her shoulders.

Who the fuck did that stranger think he was?

He was a very good-looking stranger, if she had to be honest, but he for sure wasn’t worth her time. He let his charm get to his head, she thought as she danced, shaking her head softly when she realized just what she was doing. She was thinking about him, and he didn’t deserve to be talked about.

So, she danced, even with strangers. She couldn’t exactly place it, but dancing with random men sent her body in a frenzy. She heated up as she swayed her hips, forehead growing sweaty, throat drying. Amelia felt like an animal, the club her natural habitat.

Even if on her own, she danced until her legs couldn’t hold her up anymore, until she felt sweaty, until she couldn’t take it anymore. She went back to the bar just when it was really needed, hoping that the stranger from earlier had left and she could enjoy a drink on her own.

Elias was still there, though, uncharacteristically silent as he nursed another glass of rum and coke. He was surprised at himself for spending the night alone: normally, he would have been at home by midnight, having sex with the girl he picked up that night. Instead, he was there, eyeing his prey as she made her way towards the other side of the countertop.

Their eyes met, Amelia’s squaring him as her eyebrows furrowed. She couldn’t believe he was still there. Elias couldn’t keep his eyes off of her, and Amelia couldn’t help herself either.

Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was the heat, but she couldn’t deny the sudden attraction towards the man a few feet away from her. All her self-control seemed to leave her body when he stood up from his chair, taking his time to make his way past the crowd surrounding them. She filled with jitters as she downed her drink, letting the alcohol burn her insides and wake her body up.

A firm body pressed against her back just as she put her glass down, a huff of warm breath hitting her cheek as a familiar voice snapped her out of her trance.

“I knew you’d give in,” Elias whispered in her ear, voice sending shivers down her spine. “You can’t resist me, nobody can,”

“Don’t let it get to your head too much, boy,” Amelia hissed, turning around to face him, her index finger stabbing his chest. “You’re still a stuck-up, egocentric dick that-”

Elias’ lips crashed against hers quickly, her body freezing for a sharp second before she could get comfortable again. Her arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer just as his tongue parted her lips, his hands leaving a hot trail everywhere they touched.

Amelia felt in heaven for a second as she let him have control, her fingers burying themselves in his hair as he started to pull away, keeping him closer for one more second. Elias parted ways to call the bartender, ordering two shots before paying his check.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Amelia asked, confusion and annoyance coating her tone as she looked up at the man.

“I’m doing you a favor,” Elias smirked, grabbing the smaller glasses and pushing one her way. “Drink, so you won’t bitch in the morning,”

He made the shot glasses clink before throwing his head back and downing the drink, admiring Amelia when she followed his lead. Her features scrunched for a quick second before she looked up at him, grabbing the neck of his shirt to pull him down, their lips meeting quickly.

“You better make it worth it, asshole,” Amelia whispered against his lips, the smirk painting his features making the fire inside her burn even more.

“You won’t regret it, sweetheart,”

-

Amelia woke up in a gray, unknown room, head aching in the most terrible way and her mouth dry. She was confused, laying on her side as she looked around, trying to figure out just where she was.

It looked like she was in a hotel - the decorative plants and paintings being too basic for a normal house -, and definitely not her apartment. She was eager to find her phone and see where she was located, but huffed when she discovered her purse was on the other side of the room, too far away to reach.

Amelia laid back down, sighing as she tried to relax her tense muscles. She was uncharacteristically not worried about the fact that she had slept in a foreign hotel room after a night out, and she wasn’t too scared to take her time, either - it was a Saturday, after all.

She seemed to feel the weight of an arm around her waist just then, as if her body had been numb the entire time. A sudden wave of flashbacks hit her like a truck as she shuffled out of the bed, her awakening being rougher than she had expected.

She had slept with the stranger.

Amelia had slept with the cocky asshole from the club, and she was standing in front of his sleeping frame in just a pair of panties and a way-too-big shirt that certainly didn’t belong to her.

In a state of shock, she stumbled towards the window, parting the curtains to reveal a cloudy Times Square. She realized in less than a minute that she was inside the Kimpton Muse, the five-star hotel she could only dream about.

“Fucking hell,”

The sudden voice made her jump, spinning around quickly to see the stranger - well, Elias - stretching under the warm comforter.

“What the fuck did we do-” Amelia mumbled, a mix of exasperation and panic coating her words as one of her hands ran through her messy hair.

Her own voice seemed to scare Elias, his eyes jumping towards her as a satisfied smile painted his lips. “Well, good morning, sweetheart,” he murmured, sitting up on the bed and letting the duvet fall away from him, revealing his naked chest.

Amelia groaned at the sight, his toned body bringing back another set of flashbacks as she remembered his hands on her body, his lips on her neck. “Didn’t think you’d still be here,” Elias continued.

“Didn’t even know I was here,” Amelia mumbled back as she searched for anything to put on, in a rush to leave the room. A sudden wave of panic hit her as she remembered they had slept together, that she hadn’t just come back to his place to sleep in his bed. She also registered the ache between her legs just when she ran towards the closest trashcan. “Tell me we used protection,”

“Amelia, relax-”

“Elias, fucking tell me,” the woman hissed his way, a scowl on her face as her stormy eyes focused on his, his cocky demeanor slowly fading.

“We did,” the guitarist admitted, mindlessly pointing towards the en-suite. “You can go check the garbage in there,”

Amelia’s heart slowed down just after his answer, her body slowly moving towards the bathroom and checking, a relieved sigh leaving the lips when she saw a discarded condom inside the trashcan.

“Thank God,” she whispered under her breath, stepping back inside the room to search for her dress. Amelia wanted to leave the hotel - and Elias - behind as quickly as she could. They had made a mistake, and the quicker she could forget about it, the better it would be for everyone.

Elias was left to look at her as she scrambled around the room, running a hand through his messy hair as he held back a chuckle.

“What?” Amelia asked when she caught him staring, her eyebrows furrowing.

“Why are you rushing? Got somewhere to be?”

“As far away from you as possible,” Amelia spat out, discarding the shirt she could only guess was his and not really caring that she was topless. He had seen every part of her anyway, right? She pulled her dress back on, groaning when she struggled with the zipper.

“Why?” Elias asked, throwing the duvet away from his body as he stood up to help her. His hands were gentle as he touched her back, zipping her up before letting his fingertips linger against her skin.

“Because it was a fucking mistake,” she stated quickly, grasping her purse from the couch a few feet away and grabbing her phone, sighing when she realized it was dead. “It was nice meeting you,” she lied, grabbing her heels and keeping them in her hands. “Have a nice life,”

She didn’t leave him time to say goodbye, leaving his hotel room and heading for the elevators as quickly as she could. As she rummaged inside her purse, her fingers caught onto something cold, small.

Amelia’s eyebrows furrowed as she fished for the object, only to find a familiar ring. Elias’ ring. She had to search through her mind to remember when he could have lost it, and her only conclusion was when the two of them had been messily making out inside the Uber, right before getting to his hotel.

A huff automatically left her mouth, her inner self questioning whether she should bring it back to him or just throw it in the trash. The elevator opened, though, interrupting her inner monologue, and she was forced to do her walk of shame in front of the rich patrons of the hotel.

She felt like she truly started breathing again just when she reached Times Square, calling a cab and finally relaxing in its backseat. Amelia had slept with probably the most annoying stranger she had ever met, not only blowing up the promise she had made to herself to never sleep with cocky assholes, but also hating herself for it.

Why the hell did she do that?

All she could remember was how good he was, how earth-shattering the orgasms he gave her were, and how worth it he had made it.

She hated herself for it, but she couldn’t deny the fact that she had enjoyed it. She had enjoyed his chasing, she had enjoyed his attention, and she had enjoyed the sex more than everything.

Amelia needed to forget about him, though, and nothing was going to stop her from doing that. She didn’t need a man like Elias in her life: men like him were a waste of emotions, a waste of time, and she had a life to live.

Yet, when she arrived home and emptied her purse, his ring didn’t go in the trash. She let it sit on her nightstand.

She needed to forget about him, but maybe that task could wait a little longer to be done.

-----

Elias didn’t know what he was doing, if he had to be honest. His mind was elsewhere as he sat on the couch of his hotel, guitar in hand as he strummed an improvised melody. The sounds were entering one ear and leaving from the other, working as background noise.

Chordback’s world tour had ended just a few weeks prior, and he was more than happy to enjoy his stay in New York, one of his favorite places in the world. Sure, it didn’t feel like home, but there was nothing as comforting as the Big Apple’s nightclubs for the guitarist.

He was the life of the party, and New York was the party.

Elias couldn’t understand how he had gotten there, though: on a Saturday night, alone in his room, missing the first ring he had bought himself after signing his contract. He couldn’t understand just why his body was so against going outside, why his mind was agreeing with that decision too.

One thing he was sure of, was the fact that he couldn’t get Amelia out of his head. Images of her naked body appeared in his mind, interrupting his sleep and leaving him hot and bothered in the middle of the night. And when he considered calling an old hookup to take care of the mess he had become? His body would just refuse to collaborate.

It had been one week ever since he had first met her, one painful week. He didn’t know what to do with himself anymore, and all he wished for was to have one more night with her.

Elias had never been one for encores, and he was shocked at his own self for even wanting the same woman that badly more than once. But he did what he had never thought he could do, grabbing his phone from the coffee table and dialing Chordback’s personal assistant’s number.

He took a swig of his beer as he listened to the hums of the line, gripping his guitar with force as he waited for Deborah to pick up. He couldn’t take it anymore.

“Hey, man,” The voice he heard, though, didn’t belong to Deborah. Matthew had answered the phone, words slightly slurred as Elias heard some munching coming from his bandmate’s line. “What’s up?”

“Chucky,” the guitarist chuckled breathily, running a hand through his hair as he rested his neck on the back of the couch. “Is Debby there? I need to ask her something,”

“Oh, uh- yeah, we were just making muffins,” Matthew mumbled. “Babe, Elias needs to talk to you- I’ll see you soon, man,”

“Yeah,” Elias mumbled, listening to the shuffling from the other line until the assistant’s voice ringed through his ears.

“Elias? You doing okay?”

“Yeah, no, I’m doing just fine,” the guitarist admitted. “I just need a favor,”

Deborah hummed, probably sitting down, as Elias blew out a sigh. “You didn’t just get someone pregnant, did you?”

“No, no!” Elias squeaked, making the woman laugh gently.

“Then what is it?”

A sudden wave of nerves hit the guitarist at that moment, his confidence long gone as he asked himself just what he was supposed to say. ‘I met a girl and I can’t get her out of my mind’ was definitely not something he would normally say. That wasn’t him.

The words came out before he could even stop them, eyes shutting close as soon as he finished his sentence. “I slept with a girl last week and she has my ring,” as if that was all he needed from Amelia.

“That ring?” Deborah’s voice grew more tender as she realized what he was talking about. The ring had a meaning deeper than one could expect, and that was why Elias couldn’t exactly live without it. “She stole that ring?”

“N-”

“Give me her name,” Deborah stated, voice serious. Elias kept silent for a second as he internally cursed himself out for being that stupid. Amelia hadn’t stolen the ring: he had been dumb enough to play with it while being drunk, and it fell inside her purse. “Elias, give me her name,”

He just wanted to talk to her.

“Amelia,” he mumbled, chest filling with regret. “I don’t have her last name, but I know she lives in New York,”

“Alright,” Deborah pressed, voice harsh. “She will hear from me,”

“Debby, I’ll handle it,” Elias interrupted her mumbling, selfishly using the mess he had created to reach his goal: talking to her again. “I just need her number,”

The woman on the other line stayed in silence for a second. “I’ll start my research right now,”

The call was ended quickly from her, leaving him in shock and silence in the middle of his room.

What the fuck had he done?

-----

“Hello?”

Amelia’s tone was painted with uncertainty when she answered the call, eyebrows furrowed as she balanced the phone between her ear and shoulder.

“Hi, this is Deborah Miller, personal assistant of the band Chordback. Amelia?”

“Uh- yes, that’s me,” Amelia mumbled, entering the back of the haircare store she owned to hear the woman on the other side of the call better.

“I’m calling regarding your encounter with Elias Lindholm, last Friday night,” the woman stated, making Amelia’s eyes close shut. Oh, God. She had fucked up. “I was notified by him that his ring went missing, and that you could be the one who stole it,”

Amelia stayed in silence for a second. She most certainly didn’t steal the ring.

“Stole it?!” Amelia almost yelled. “Ma’am, I don’t know what you’ve been told, but him losing his ring in my purse certainly isn’t stealing from my side,”

There was a moment of silence from the woman, Amelia’s hand resting against her forehead as she thought about the situation she had found herself in. All because of that damn stranger at the club. “I’ve given Mr. Lindholm your number so you could sort things out, but we won’t be afraid to take legal actions if the ring won’t be given back,”

Amelia was given no time to respond, the call being abruptly stopped right after the unknown woman finished speaking. She was confused to say the least, but the rage inside her made her body burn.

Elias literally wanted to sue her for carelessly losing his own ring, how was that her fault?

The bell of the store sounded just as Amelia’s phone vibrated in her hand, a text from another unknown user making her screen light up.

“I’ll be with you in a second!” She yelled at the customer, unlocking her phone to read the text.

Unknown: Hey, was wondering if we could meet up so I can get back my ring? x - Elias

Amelia rolled her eyes, face taking a look of disgust as she answered his text.

Tomorrow, five p.m. sharp at Upper West Side Central Park.

If Elias thought he was going to see her again after that, he was wrong.

-

Amelia was enraged as she sat near a tree, the cup of coffee in her hand long forgotten as her other palm held a ziplock bag. The ring was secured in there, ready to be given back to its original owner.

After the call, all she wanted to do was to give the ring back to Elias, and get back to her life - her life without the trouble that the stranger had brought as soon as they had met.

She had been threatened to be sued by his personal assistant - why the hell he had an assistant in the first place, she didn’t know -, so how was she supposed to believe he was someone to trust?

“Hey,”

The voice that snapped Amelia out of her trance was more than familiar to her, the scowl on her face not fading as she looked up at the man. She stood from the bench, keeping the distance from Elias as she threw the bag his way.

“Now, get out of my way,” she spat, ignoring the way his smile faded. “And for good, this time,”

She turned on her heels, starting to walk away from the man she had grown to hate. She had a life, places to be, and as she had first thought, Elias wasn’t worth her time. “Wait- Amelia, what the fuck happened?”

He grasped her arm, stopping her in her tracks and making her jaw clench. “You’re really asking me that, Elias? After sending your assistant my way to threaten me?! Really?!”

Elias seemed confused as he let her words sink in, eyebrows furrowing. “Wait, what?”

“Oh, now you’re acting confused,” Amelia pressed, a look of disgust painting her features as she looked in his eyes. “I stole your ring?! Really?!”

Her words started to make sense just then, Elias’ eyes shutting as he realized what Deborah had done. She didn’t listen to him. “Listen, Amelia, I told Deborah I’d handle it, she didn’t listen,” his words didn’t seem to make a difference, though. Amelia was still furious, disbelief hiding behind her orbs. “I know you didn’t steal the ring, I don’t even know why Deborah thought you did,”

“You blew your last chance, Elias,” Amelia said, interrupting his monologue. “There was a reason why I was trying to stay away from you. You’re trouble,”

Her words hit the guitarist like a truck, his heart sinking to his stomach as he watched her leave without a single ‘goodbye’. As he stood in the middle of the park like a fool, he was left to his own thoughts.

She was right, was all he could think. He had been trouble ever since he had been a baby, so he wasn’t even blaming her for parting ways. He had brought chaos in her life, and she didn’t deserve it.

Elias blew his last chance, and there was nothing he could do about it. All he could do was to see if the universe would bring them back together.

But he didn’t have much hope left in him.

-----

Elias had never been a hopeful person. He had been stubborn his entire life, but not hopeful, and not patient either. He wasn’t one to hope and wait for the universe to send a signal his way, he preferred to find the signal as quickly as possible, on his own.

With Amelia, though, he had seemed to quiet down. He knew he had no more chances with her, and he wasn’t going to make himself hate her even more. He was going to be patient, he was going to be hopeful: everything his mother had always wished he could have been as a kid.

The Big Apple was as loud as it always was, the music from distant clubs sending shivers down his spine. Elias needed to move on, and getting back in the party scene was the best option for him to succeed.

The bouncer in front of the club took one look at him, not even checking his ID before letting him inside, the blue lights feeling like home as he entered the packed space. Everything felt familiar as he pushed towards the bar, trying to get one drink in before starting to bring back the real Elias, the one that didn’t let a random girl stop him from living his life.

“Rum and coke,”

It felt like a déjà vu as he ordered his drink, smiling at the bartender before letting his eyes roam around the crowd of people dancing. He needed to forget about Amelia, and that’s what he was going to do.

As he got handed the drink, he kept his eyes on the scene, blocking out every thought. He needed to have alcohol in him before the night could start. The liquid went down his throat quicker than he had expected, his glass hitting the counter before he could join the mass of bodies in the middle of the room.

He let his body get used to the beat, the music so loud he feared for his hearing. But it was what he wanted, what he had missed. He wanted to forget about Amelia, forget about her stupid red lipstick, and her stupidly perfect curves.

Elias had turned into a man he didn’t know after meeting her, and he needed to get back to who he originally was. He wasn’t going to let a woman he had met once turn him into a man he didn’t know.

So, he danced. He danced with a pretty stranger that got attached to his hip a few moments after he had joined the crowd on the dance floor. He offered her a drink, fantasized about her luscious red lips on his body, and then realized just who he was thinking about.

In his head, who was kissing his body wasn’t the blonde grinding against him. It was Amelia. He grabbed himself a shot, and another, sequentially ordering heavier drinks with every passing hour. He knew coping with alcohol was never going to be a good decision, but he couldn’t care less.

By the time the clock hit one in the morning, he was drunkenly kissing the blonde from the dance floor, screwing the idea of making his hookup sign an NDA. He hadn’t made Amelia sign one, either, so why was he supposed to bother?

The woman was in his bed naked, ready for him, and by the time he was on top of her, Amelia had left his mind. As he kissed down her body, he thought that Amelia had become part of his past.

But as he fucked the blonde, Amelia was all he thought about.

-

Elias woke up in distress, sharply inhaling air as he sat up on his bed, pushing the burning hot covers away from his heated body. The hotel room was still dark and, as he looked to his left, his heart started beating out of his chest, his breath shortening.

The blonde from the club was sleeping next to him, cuddled on her side with her hair sprawled over the pillow. She was peaceful next to him, too peaceful for Elias’ liking as he left the bed, throwing a shirt on.

The foreign feeling inside his body made him rush out of the room to clear his mind, the need to breathe in some fresh air so desperate he took the stairs. Waking up next to a stranger had never been a problem for him, sometimes it even led to morning sex, if he was lucky. He had never had a small panic attack over a hookup spending the night.

So, why did he leave the room?

As he nodded his head towards the night staff of the hotel and headed towards the doors, he checked his phone. It was well past three, the moon still high up in the sky as he found himself in the middle of Times Square.

The city was still loud even at that hour, with cars driving past him and people quietly talking. He was grateful to be in such a lively city, he couldn’t live in his own silence anymore.

Elias let his body move with no destination, walking around the streets with an empty mind as he hoped to understand what went down just a few minutes prior. Maybe he felt trapped, when he woke up next to the stranger; or maybe, it was just the panic of waking up next to someone he didn’t know.

Either ways, he couldn’t believe that had happened to him after years of letting himself fall into hookup culture. He couldn’t help himself but wonder if that was how Amelia had felt like when she had woken up next to him. At least, he hoped she didn’t, the feeling being truly overwhelming.

Elias’ legs stopped him in front of a Chinese restaurant, its dim lights on even at three in the morning. It was lightly populated inside, but a familiar mass of hair was what really caught his attention.

There was no red lipstick, no tight dress, but he could recognize that woman out of the rest of the population in the blink of an eye. Amelia was sitting right behind the glass wall, eating dumplings mindlessly as she scrolled through her phone.

Elias’ body filled with jitters as he froze. There was a moment where he asked himself if it would have been a good idea to join her inside, her disgusted words from that day in the park playing in his head like a broken record. You blew your last chance, Elias.

He pushed the overthinking aside, though, and entered the small shop. He ended up at the register in silence, ordering himself some noodles even if he wasn’t hungry. His eyes couldn’t leave Amelia’s frame as he waited for his food to be done, and by the time he had his bowl in hand, his nerves were ready to knock him out.

He dragged himself towards her lonely table, sitting right in front of her. “Hi,” was all he said, heart skipping a beat when her eyes met his.

He was relieved to see that her face didn’t take a look of disgust, rather displaying shock as she dropped her chopsticks. “Elias,” she mumbled, scratching her neck as she let her phone rest on the table. “What are you doing here?”

“Uh- woke up hungry,” he mumbled, knowing just how big of a liar he had become in the last two minutes. “How are you doing?”

“I’m doing okay,” Amelia said, plopping a dumpling in her mouth as she rested her chin on her palm. “You?”

“I’m fine,” he had just had a panic attack over a random girl, he wasn’t fine. Silence built up between them as they ate, the sounds of the kitchen behind them filling the air. The tension was still thick, but Elias felt relatively better for talking to her, it had been what he had hoped for for weeks.

“I’m sorry,” he blurted out, her eyes snapping from her food to his face. “For everything,”

Amelia stayed in silence, eyes layering with a cold look as she remembered what he had done. “I know a stupid apology won’t fix things, but I just wish we could try to make things work. Even just as friends,”

Elias didn’t know how to be just friends with someone, so why the hell was he blurting things out like that?

Amelia gave him a strange look, a look he couldn’t decipher, but eventually popped another dumpling in her mouth. “I don’t trust you, Elias,” she mumbled, mouth full. “Especially after that shitshow with the ring,”

“I know, and that was my mistake,” Elias pointed out, running a hand through his hair. “But I’ll do anything to have you back, I promise,”

Amelia chuckled breathily, shaking her head as she looked down. There was a moment of thinking - probably wondering whether it was a good idea to give him one last chance - before she talked. “You need to keep your hands off of me, drunk or not,”

Elias nodded, looking at her as she kept talking. “I don’t need to make another mistake like that,”

“Alright,” the man mumbled. “That’s all?”

“And don’t bring trouble in my life again,” Amelia added, pointing a finger his way. “You do that one more time and we’re done,”

Elias only nodded, letting his light orbs find hers as he bit his lip. “I won’t fuck up, this time,”

“I really hope you won’t,”

-----

Amelia didn’t know why she let herself cave in. She had promised herself to stay away from Elias and the mess that was his life, but his beaten up face at the restaurant was more than pitying. She didn’t know if he realized, but the bags under his eyes didn’t look too well, and neither did his hollowed cheeks.

Regret had washed over her when his feeling spilled through his words, and as she laid on her bed in the darkness of her room, she felt pity.

Had she been too harsh on him? The deal with his ring had clearly been a misunderstanding, so her holding grudges just seemed petty, from her point of view.

But she also couldn’t help but ask herself if she had made the right decision by taking him back, even as friends. He was a dangerous game, and she stubbornly kept going back to play, just to eventually get hurt.

Elias was impossible to figure out, but something inside her soul was pushing her to him, pushing her to understand him and his life. She wanted to see what he really was about, who he could be. As much as Amelia tried to hold back, she couldn’t help the curiosity that filled her body whenever she thought about the mysterious man.

Amelia’s phone vibrated from her side, screen being the only source of light inside the pitch black room. She took a moment to breathe out a sigh before letting her eyes focus on the device, the name on the screen making her heart skip a beat.

Talk about the devil, she thought.

Elias had just sent her a text, and she despised her heart for letting his minimal attention get to her. She was better than that.

Elias: It was nice seeing you again yesterday. Going to a club tmrw, wanna join? x

Amelia sighed again. Was she ready to get back into that? Into the life of the party that was Elias Lindholm?

Her brain was asking her to just stay home, avoid the darkness of the New York clubs and the buzz of the alcohol; but her heart was opposing: it wanted her to see Elias.

So, she gave in another time, telling herself it was going to be the last one before sending him back a small text of approval. She didn’t know whether she would regret it or not, but she knew she was going to have the time of her life.

At least, she hoped so.

-

“Dry martini.”

“Still don’t get how you can drink that shit,” Elias yelled in her ear right after Amelia ordered her drink. “Tastes like pure shit,”

“It’s classy,” Amelia explained with a smirk, thanking the bartender with a raise of her eyebrows before letting the alcohol burn her mouth.

Elias only chuckled, taking a sip of his own rum and coke, as he let his eyes travel over Amelia’s body. She cleaned up well in one of her tight dresses, her signature red lipstick making his cock stir inside his pants.

The night had started well, with them meeting in front of the club before joining the crowd inside. Elias had kept his hands to himself, pushed intrusive thoughts away, and let the night roll just like how he had expected it to do.

After two rounds of dancing and a second drink, his views had very much changed. Under the influence of the alcohol, all he could think about was Amelia and how stupidly hot she looked. In some ways, keeping his promise seemed more difficult than he had expected it to be.

“Elias? You still there?” Amelia waved a hand in front of his eyes, snapping him out of his trance. The guitarist laughed, nodding his head before letting his eyes focus on the scenery surrounding them.

A familiar face struck out to him in the middle of the crowd, and it was a matter of seconds before the man he had recognized walked closer to where Elias and Amelia stood.

Jake Bates was as tall as Elias remembered him to be, his beard neatly trimmed surrounding the smile that painted his face. He was intimidating, just like back in the days, and Elias felt more than happy to see his old friend again.

“Hey, man! Long time, no see!” The guitarist yelled over the music, sharing a hug with the tallest man Amelia had probably seen. “What are you doing here?”

“Just enjoying a night at the club,” Jake admitted. “Congrats on the new album, by the way,”

Elias chuckled, thanking him softly as he remembered about Amelia just then, letting his hand brush against her lower back. “Jake, this is Amelia,” the guitarist explained. “Amelia, this is my friend Jake. We used to play in the same band back in High School,”

Amelia’s eyes widened, her hand sticking out to shake Jake’s as she introduced herself. There was a moment before she looked up at Elias, the realization of what he had said hitting her. “You used to play?”

“I, uh- I still do,” Elias admitted, scratching the back of his head. “I’m the guitarist of a rock band, right now,”

“That’s cool,” Amelia mumbled, body filled with amazement at the new discovery. “And you, Jake? You still play, too?”

“Oh, no,” the man chuckled. “I’m a personal trainer, now,”

“That’s great, man,” Elias said, smiling his way before another woman interrupted the conversation.

“Babe, I’m heading out to smoke, I’ll be back in a sec,” she yelled in Jake’s direction, smiling gingerly at Amelia and Elias.

“I’m coming with you, just lemme say goodbye,”

Jake turned around to face the old friend and the new acquaintance, wishing them a good night before leaving them on their own at the bar in silence. The music was still loud as they finished their drinks, both in their own heads.

Amelia thought she was stupid. She had just become friends with Elias, and still didn’t know anything about him. Hell, she didn’t even know if being a guitarist was a job or a hobby, for him. How could she maintain a friendship with him if she was in the dark about his life?

“So… you play?” Amelia asked with her last ounce of courage, looking up at Elias’ light eyes as she let herself focus on him.

“Electric guitar, yeah,” he mumbled, tipping his head back to finish his drink. “I just recently finished a world tour,”

“Woah,” the woman muttered, a hint of amazement in her voice as the bullet points inside her head started to make sense: he had a personal assistant, he had no trouble partying every night, he stayed at one of the most expensive hotels in New York. Elias could be considered the life of the party, but Amelia realized he was just living the life of a rock star.

“You never told me what you do,” Elias changed the topic, making Amelia become the center of the conversation. “I’ve just seen you around at night,”

Amelia chuckled, calling the bartender over for a couple of shots. “I own a haircare shop, so we sell products for any kind of hair,” she stated, pushing three shot glasses Elias’ way. “Straight, wavy, curly, braids, wigs,”

Elias hummed, smiling her way as he downed his first shot, waiting for her to follow along. The tequila was burning his throat, but the sweet sight of Amelia’s features was enough to make him feel numb.

She was slowly letting lose thanks to the alcohol, becoming the carefree woman Elias had met on their first encounter, and there was nothing in the world that could stop his heart from beating as quickly as it did.

Amelia threw her head back, finishing her last shots just to frown lightly. The music suddenly changed, a squeal leaving the woman’s lips as soon as the darker melody entered her ears. “I fucking love this song!” She yelled. “I’m going dancing,”

Elias only chuckled, watching her hips sway as she left his side and joined the crowd on the dance floor. She let the music embrace her softly, her body moving to the beat as she lightly sang. The red lights of the club illuminated her face in the best way, putting her features on display as Elias stared at her, as if she was the only woman in the world.

It became painfully hard to just watch, Elias’ body trembling with need. He needed to be close to her, to feel her, to touch her. Flashbacks of their night together appeared in his mind, sending him in a frenzy as he let the autopilot take over.

He downed his last shot, leaving the countertop to reach the dance floor. The music was easy to follow as he snuck past people to reach Amelia. Her dark dress was everything he could focus on, and when he was able to let his hands rest on her waist, it felt like the whole world stopped.

It felt like they were alone in the middle of the dance floor, dancing the tension away, Amelia’s body so close to his he could barely breathe. Every thought about the promise he had made seemed to disappear from his mind, all he could think about being Amelia and her body under his. He couldn’t help his needs anymore, and she didn’t seem to mind his attention.

“Fuck,” he whispered in her ear, breathing ragged as he pulled her closer. “Amelia, what are you doing to me?”

She laughed giddily, letting her arms wrap around his neck as her back hit his chest. The need to lean down and press a kiss to her neck was burning Elias alive, but Amelia let all the sexual tension fade when she turned around and kissed him with everything she had.

Her lips were as hungry as Elias remembered them to be, and as he let his palms slide against the curve of her ass, he couldn’t help the feeling of déjà vu. “Bring me home, Elias,” she whispered seductively in his ear, letting her palms slide down his chest.

Realization seemed to hit him just then: the promise, his last chance. “Amelia-”

“Please, I want this, Elias,” she muttered, biting on her lip. She didn’t know what - or who - was possessing her body, but she knew she would regret it in the morning. Her body needed him, though, and she wasn’t thinking straight anymore. “I can’t keep myself away from you,”

Her consent was all he needed to tug her away from the scene, getting inside the first taxi leading to his hotel. With burning hands and heated bodies, they struggled to make their way inside his room. Drunk giggles were leaving their lips as Elias opened his door, locking it behind the two of them before he could lay Amelia on his bed, kissing her lips like he wanted to rock her world.

With her body sat right on the edge of the mattress, Elias fell to his knees, letting his lips find the crook of her neck, slowly moving to her chest. His kisses reached her breasts, fingers eagerly ripping her dress apart.

“Elias! I fucking loved this dress!” She whined, a low moan leaving her lips when his mouth found one of her nipples, interrupting her train of thoughts.

“I’ll buy you a new one,” he muttered, out of breath. “Fuck, I’ll buy you the whole store,”

His hands sneakily found her underwear, pushing it down her legs as he kissed her stomach, spreading her thighs to take a good look at her center. She was glistening - ready for him -, and every ounce of responsibility in Elias’ mind seemed to disappear.

He blew cold air on her clit, loving the whine that left her lips at the denied pleasure. Elias chuckled darkly, letting his head dip down until his lips closed around Amelia’s clit. She breathed out a sigh, fingers carding through his messy curls as all the tension left her body.

The alcohol had gotten to her head, but she was sincere when she admitted to herself that she was more than conscious at that moment. His mouth on her heat was making her see stars, and all she could do was moan.

“Elias-” Amelia breathed out, the ghost of his fingers over her entrance making her strangle a scream.

The man only smirked, letting his eyes meet hers as he gave her bundle of nerves another suck, her moans becoming music to his ears. Eating her out felt like paradise, and all Elias was missing was to see her cum.

His goal was to have her at his mercy, totally helpless as she orgasmed around his fingers. All he wanted was to feel her, touch her, call her his own. He shrugged the last thought off as he inserted a finger in her wetness, her moan making his cock stir.

“Elias, I can’t-”

“Cum for me, princess,” he whispered against her pussy. “Let go,”

Amelia was able to take in a shaky breath before the most powerful orgasm she had ever felt had her body shaking. Her walls squeezed around Elias’ fingers as his mouth lapped up her juices, a proud smirk on his lips when he looked up at her.

Amelia eagerly cupped his cheeks, pulling him close and kissing him hungrily. She moaned at the taste of herself on his lips, her hands traveling south to strip Elias of his pants. She needed to feel him close, to feel him inside her again.

“This is the last time, Elias,” she whispered between kisses, knowing damn well she was lying to herself. “This is the last time,”

-

“Fucking hell-” Amelia hissed, her hand rubbing against her aching forehead. Rays of sunlight entered the hotel room, making her tired eyes squint. She breathed out a sigh, turning on her back as her thumb rubbed the skin of Elias’ arm on her waist.

As much as she hated herself for spending the night again, she couldn’t hold herself back from taking a moment to relax next to the guitarist, the events of the previous nights replaying inside her head.

The panic she had felt the first time she’d slept with Elias was nonexistent, at that moment. She didn’t feel the need to run away, to hide from him and hope to never see him again. She wanted to enjoy his closeness one last time, and she didn’t care it might make her look smitten.

Her heart skipped a beat when she looked to her side, noticing Elias was still asleep on his stomach, lips pulled in an involuntary pout. The thought of waking up next to him every morning found its way inside her brain, her chest filling with warmth as she let herself daydream. Because it was going to be just a daydream.

Amelia’s free hand tangled itself in his hair, softly massaging his scalp as a sense of peace made her blow out a sigh. Her eyes fell on the nearest clock just when Elias started to stir, a groan leaving his lips.

“Keep doing that,” he mumbled groggily, referring to Amelia’s motions on his scalp.

“Good morning to you, too,” Amelia giggled, fondly looking down at him, heart speeding up. His light eyes held tiredness as he looked at her, but she thought the look suited him, in some way.

“What time is it?”

“A little past nine,” she whispered, remembering a shipment of products was supposed to arrive by ten, the need to open the shop making her sigh. She wished she could spend the entire day in bed with Elias, her own thought leaving her quite shocked. How did she go from being cold, heartless towards the man sleeping next to her, to wishing to spend the day with him in the span of one night? She truly didn’t know if there was something wrong with her.

“Just in time for breakfast,” Elias muttered, sitting up against the bed frame and pulling Amelia closer to his body.

“I, uh- I’ve got to go open the store,” she mumbled. “It’s just Tuesday, you know,”

“Right,” Elias sighed, watching her as she awkwardly rolled out of bed. She started to search for her dress, at least until the guitarist pushed himself out of the bed too, opening the dresser and pushing some clothes her way. “Wear these, I can’t let you work in that dress,”

“Thank you,” Amelia said, voice a whisper as she let her eyes meet his. Tension filled the distance between them as Amelia pulled the large sweats and shirt over her body, thankful for the comfort they brought to her. Wearing the dress to work would have been an uncomfortable experience - especially if paired with a migraine -, and she was thankful Elias thought about it before she could.

Meanwhile, the guitarist was inside the en-suite, brushing his teeth as his eyes focused on her mirror reflection. “I owe you breakfast,” he slurred through the mouthful of toothpaste, spitting it out just after finishing his sentence. “Twice,”

“We’ll find a day to do that,” Amelia mumbled, joining him in front of the mirror to figure her hair out. She pulled it in a quick ponytail, walking back inside the main room to grab her purse and the rest of her belongings. “I just really have to go now,”

Elias nodded his head, joining her just to let his hands cup her cheeks, pulling her close for a gentle kiss. “Text when you get there,” he whispered, pulling away to kiss her forehead.

Amelia’s heart was ready to give out on her after his actions, her body automatically giving him a shaky nod before she headed towards the door, saying a weak ‘goodbye’. As she left the hotel, all she could think about was the way the morning had played out, how gentle Elias had been.

A little voice inside her head told her she could get used to it, but she shrugged it off. Loving a man like Elias unconditionally would lead to trouble, and she knew it. But if the moments she had just lived were part of what loving him would be like, then all she wanted was to be his.

To be his, unconditionally.

-----

Amelia didn’t expect it to go that far. She expected it to happen two times - both drunk and in need of release -, but she didn’t expect Elias to be that addicting. His voice, his touch, his kisses: they had all become something she couldn’t live without.

She found herself thinking about him at work, under the shower, right before bed, and she couldn’t even think of a life without him. To think she hated him, just a few months prior.

Amelia found herself accustomed to his hotel bed, spending more nights there than on her own, and Elias wasn’t one to push her away. She didn’t think he could. The way she looked at him - the same way he looked at her - was not usually how people looked at their one-night-stands - or friends-with-benefits, if you wanted to call it that.

To say she was confused was an understatement. The feelings inside her chest were something she hadn’t experienced before. They were called love, said an article online, and she had despised the word from the moment she had first seen it.

Amelia wasn’t ready to love Elias. Heck, she wasn’t ready to love, at all.

But when he looked at her, had sex with her, talked to her, all she could think about was love. As she headed towards the Kimpton Muse, under the streetlights and the New York moon, she wondered whether it was a good idea or not to be playing such a dangerous game. Opening herself up for him, letting him see all of her fragile parts, becoming vulnerable - it wasn’t something she wanted to do.

All the nights - and the morning after their second hookup especially - they had spent together had just been multiple mistakes. So, she entered the hotel with a task: making it clear that she wanted nothing to happen.

Amelia waved at the cute clerk down the hall, whose smile reached his eyes as he watched her pass by, before she headed towards the elevators. She didn’t exactly know why she was that nervous, but as she walked towards Elias’ room, she couldn’t help her hands from shaking.

There were slight sounds coming from his room, but she shrugged them off. When she reached his door, the sounds became more clear, more loud. They sounded like whimpers, grumbles of his voice occasionally reaching Amelia’s ears too.

She knocked. No response. She knocked a second time, waiting for anything to happen. Just when she was about to knock a third time, the door opened, revealing a disheveled Elias.

His pupils were dilated - their darkness replacing the light color of his orbs -, his lips were swollen, red, hair a knotty mess on top of his head. He gave her a once-over, the smirk Amelia knew so well painting his lips.

“Hey,” just his first waft of breath was enough to make her face scrunch. He smelled like pure alcohol, and even with one word she could tell he was slurring.

“Are you drunk?” Amelia asked with a whisper, looking around the hallway to see if anyone was around. She didn’t want the other rich patrons to see him in that state. Elias only laughed, nodding slightly.

“I also had some weed, such a shame you weren’t there to try it with me,” he slurred.

“Let’s get you back inside,” Amelia sighed, trying to push the door open just to be stopped by a loud yell.

“No!” Elias said, his own loud voice making him flinch. “No, don’t come in. Please, princess,”

His words had Amelia’s brows furrowing. She had been in his room countless times, why was he holding her back from entering? She had seen the hotel room in its messiest state, what was he worrying about?

“Elias, I can’t have people seeing you like this,” Amelia whispered, using just a small amount of force to let herself walk in. He was weaker than she had imagined him to be, letting her hands cup his cheeks to examine him quickly.

“Took you long, tiger,”

The voice was foreign in Amelia’s ears, the seductive tone sending shivers down her spine. She looked to her left, eyes falling on the messy king-sized bed where a much-sober girl was kneeling, half-naked.

The way Amelia’s heart fell to her stomach had her knees almost giving up on her. She gave the woman a quick look before glancing back at Elias, voice small. “I’ll, uh- I’ll leave you to that,”

“Amelia-”

“No, get back, Elias,” she whispered, the anger inside her staying at bay just because he was under the influence, basically unconscious. “I don’t- I don’t have time for this. Goodbye,”

Amelia was out of his room as quickly as she had entered, heart pounding. She found him with another girl. She walked inside the elevator in shock, eyes glazing with a set of tears she didn’t want to spill.

He didn’t deserve her tears, her attention even less.

That’s what she meant when she thought that loving him was going to be a mistake. At one point, she knew one of them would fuck up, break the other person’s heart, and then leave. That’s what she had foreseen, and that’s what had happened.

She had caught him with someone else and, even if they weren’t in a relationship, it hurt. Amelia didn’t know if what she was feeling for Elias was really love, but her reaction to heartbreak was enough to answer all her questions.

Throughout her month of being Elias’ friend-with-benefits, Amelia had fallen in love with him. She was admitting it.

One lone tear slid down her cheek just as the elevator’s doors opened, revealing the quite empty hall of the hotel. Amelia wiped her skin, taking a deep breath before starting to make her way out. A familiar voice caught her before she could leave, the dark, slicked-back hair she had grown to recognize appearing in front of her.

“Hi, Amelia,” Andrew, the clerk she had waved to just a few minutes prior - and also had talked to whenever she was at the hotel, waiting for a cab to get back home -, said. “How are you doing?”

“I’ve been better,” she chuckled sadly, running a hand through her hair. “What’s up, Andrew? I’m in kind of a rush,”

Andrew took a second to look at her, clearing his throat. “I was wondering if you were free tomorrow? There’s this new place in the Upper West Side, and I thought we could go there together?”

The sudden invite had Amelia shocked for a quick second, her eyes widening slightly before she could nod her head. She was going on a date. With someone that wasn’t Elias. “Uh- yes! Sure!”

Andrew smiled, it reached his eyes. He pushed a stray hair out of her face before slipping her his number, the smile still on his face. “I’ll see you tomorrow, then. Text me,”

He left Amelia on her own in the middle of the hall to get back to work, her heart hammering against her rib cage. She was going on a date with someone she genuinely liked, and it wasn’t even out of spite.

The events with Elias were quick to leave her mind as she thought about Andrew and how he had asked her out. Elias hadn’t even done that. She breathed out a sigh as she left the Kimpton Muse, heading back home for the night.

After what happened with Elias, all she needed was to move on. And Andrew was just the right person to do that with.

-

Amelia hadn’t been on a date in years. The last time she had been wined-and-dined had been more than a year prior to her date with Andrew, and it felt good to be back in the dating scene.

The restaurant Andrew had brought her to was the right amount of fancy, with finely dressed waiters and good food she would remember for a lifetime. The prices were affordable, and the wine was divine. It was the perfect place for a date, and the guy in front of her was the perfect date.

He had picked her up, helped her sit down at their table, and Amelia was pretty sure he was going to pay for her dinner. And he was listening to her, genuinely interested in what she was talking about, something Elias rarely did. He wasn’t one for talking.

Amelia shook her head at her brain’s mention of Elias, giving herself a mental slap for even thinking about him. She had a wonderful man in front of her, and there should have been no space for Elias during the date.

“I mean, the hotel is pretty crazy, right now,” Andrew kept talking, playing with the edge of his napkin as he did so. “Don’t get me wrong, I love my job, but there has been trouble with the employees and I’ve basically been reassigned,”

“Reassigned?” Amelia asked with a frown, tone coating with curiosity.

“I’m still at the check-in station, but we’ve lost the bartender due to an argument with our boss; so now I’m a bartender, I guess?”

Amelia giggled, shaking her head at the craziness of the situation. “So now you have to learn all those complicated drinks?”

“Yes,” Andrew groaned, burying his face in his hands before peeking at her through the gap between his fingers. “And all the rich entrepreneurs always ask for the most intricate shit. Like, man, I’m from the Bronx. I don’t even know where to begin with that Upper East Side bullshit,”

His last sentence made Amelia laugh, louder than she had laughed in what felt like ages. She was having fun, and the night felt young. Her phone - which had been long forgotten inside her clutch for the entirety of the evening - seemed to snap back to reality with its loud ringtone, Amelia’s eyebrows furrowing.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered, heart skipping a beat when Andrew waved off her apology. He let his chin rest on the palm of his hand as he admired her, watching attentively the way her face scrunched into a frown after reading the name on the screen.

Elias.

Amelia didn’t know whether answering was the right choice to do. Her heart - as gentle as it had always been -, begged her to swipe right, ask why he was calling. Her brain, though, reminded her she was in the middle of a date, with a guy that actually cared. So she swiped left, her phone became silent again, and she put it back in her clutch.

Amelia couldn’t even open her mouth to restart the conversation before the ringtone bothered her and the rest of the restaurant-goers a second time. Another string of apologies left her mouth as he scrambled for her phone.

“You should probably take it,” Andrew mumbled, pointing towards the device with a tight-lipped smile.

Amelia nodded, that time swiping right and pressing the phone to her ear. “What do you want?” She asked, words quick, voice cold.

“To apologize, I don’t know what happened to me last night,” Elias stated, sounding more than tired. “And I owe you an explanation,”

“I don’t need an explanation,” the woman stated. “I have to go, I’m busy, right now,”

“Too busy for me? Why don’t you come over?” The cocky tone of his voice made Amelia roll her eyes. “I can apologize to you and then we can make up the adult way,”

Amelia’s nostrils flared as anger filled her system, a fist balling under the table. “I don’t have time for you,”

“Where are you? I can send a car to pick you up,”

“I’m on a date, Elias,” Amelia spat out, voice coated with anger. “And I’d very appreciate if you’d stop calling me, right now,”

There was silence on his end, Amelia breathing heavily after her small rant. She clenched her jaw, too angry to be faced with his silence. “Goodbye,”

She ended the call, putting her phone on silent before sliding it inside her clutch again, taking a deep breath before looking back up at Andrew. “I’m sorry, let’s just pretend this didn’t happen,”

“An ex calling you up again?” Andrew asked, a smile on his lips.

Elias wasn’t exactly an ex, but Amelia felt like she could consider him so. They had had a friends-with-benefits relationship - that partially leaned into more from her side, apparently -, he had broken her heart, and she was done with him. Too many times had she given him a second chance, he didn’t deserve her anymore.

“Yeah, I guess so,” she answered, taking a sip of her wine. “Back to you, though. You were saying?”

The night went back in full swing, the conversation with Elias long forgotten after a few minutes as Andrew and Amelia went back to their own world. Amelia’s forgotten phone lit up in her purse with a text she would eventually see at the end of the date, a text from Elias.

I really owe you an apology. Tomorrow night, Kimpton Muse.

-

Elias wasn’t happy. He hadn’t been happy for a while.

The hotel room was as plain as it had always been, but he seemed to realize it just then, while being in a state of numbness. The bags under his eyes were more prominent than he had thought they would be, and his hair had reached a state where it was impossible to fix.

He had closed himself up in his room after the night, and he wasn’t ready to leave it. If anyone of his bandmates had seen him in that state, he wouldn’t have lived another day in peace. He felt delusional, not just because he couldn’t get out of bed to even take a shower, but because he ruined the best relationship he had ever had with someone.

Amelia had become the ray of sunlight in his dark life, she had brought happiness to his depressing days stuck in his hotel room, and she had become his person. It was too bad he couldn’t figure out how to treat her correctly.

It was the way he couldn’t control his own self from being the careless asshole he really was that had pushed her to go on a date with someone else, and he had lost her. He was sure about that.

At eleven, he was lying in his bed in a pair of sweats and a wifebeater. His suitcase was packed, resting beside him on the bedside table was a ticket to Calgary, a ticket to go back home if things with Amelia didn’t fix.

He was tired of staying in a hotel room that didn’t feel like home, he was tired of New York, and he couldn’t live with his embarrassment anymore. He wanted to go back home and build himself a new life. If he was lucky, with Amelia.

Her name brought back memories inside his head, like the day they had spent in bed naked, together; or the time she talked about her family to him. Memories he hoped to relive, maybe more than once.

As much as Elias had hoped to see Amelia one last time, the knock on his door came as a shock. He didn’t think he’d be able to see her one last time, and he most certainly didn’t deserve to even give her an apology, that’s what his mind kept telling him.

He scrambled towards the door, trying to hide the empty beer bottles littering the floor behind the closest curtains. He didn’t want her to see the mess he had become. When he opened the wooden door, the sight of the girl he had grown to love - even if he didn’t show it - made his heart skip a beat.

“Hi,”

“Hi,” Amelia reciprocated the greeting, voice cold.

“Uh- come in,”

As Elias opened the door wider for her, he hoped she couldn’t see just what he had become after the night. Amelia didn’t take a seat on the couch, and neither on the armchair, so he stayed on his feet, too.

Silence filled the air as he watched her arms fold over her chest, her mouth in a thin line. It was clear that she didn’t want to be there, in front of him.

“I’m sorry,” Elias started, biting the insides of his cheek when Amelia’s jaw clenched. “I fucked up. That night was a mistake,”

“Just that night?” Amelia spat out, a dry chuckle leaving her lips. “You think that only that night was a mistake?”

Elias didn’t answer her questions, taking a moment to think of what to say. “I went to a house party and got shitfaced because I couldn’t help it. I- I was confused,”

“Elias, you called me,” Amelia hissed. “You called me when you were drunk in your room, asked me to join you, and then I had to be faced with the reality that I was right all along. Nothing ends well with you,”

The information spilling out of the woman’s mouth was new. He had called her? In his hungover head, she had come over out of the blue, catching him in the middle of something with a girl he didn’t even know the name of. “I called you?”

“You did,” Amelia said. “And I came over to help you, Elias. I came over to take care of you for the night, because I knew you wouldn’t, you never do,”

Her words made his heart clench, regret making his eyes blurry with tears. “I’m sorry,”

“I thought we could have had something,” Amelia whispered. “I really thought we could. I was ready to give you my world, help you become the best version of you,”

“Why would you do that for me?” Elias asked, body numb as he let his back slide against the wall, his body hitting the floor soon after.

“Because you deserve to be loved, too,” Amelia sniffled, a lone tear slipping down her cheek as she looked down at him. “And I loved you. Well, I still do, I guess,”

Elias’ eyes closed as soon as the words left her mouth. Regret, pain, heartache, all wrecked his body into little pieces as he tried to stay calm, the pain in her tone punctuating the truth behind her words.

“But this can’t work out,” she whispered, her own hand wiping her tears away as she took in a shaky breath.

As much as Elias wanted to understand where she was coming from, he didn’t want to see her go. He wasn’t ready to let her leave his life that quickly. He had fucked up, but something in him took over, something that could fix the mess that he had started. “It can, Amelia. We can make it work,”

Her jaw clenched, the heartbreak she was feeling slowly turning into anger. “This is one of the reasons we wouldn’t work, Elias,” she spat out. “You can’t take a no,”

“Come to Calgary with me,” he ignored her words, lifting himself up from the ground to grasp her hands. She pushed him away with a scroll, a look of disgust on her face. “We can start from zero over there, I’m sure we could work out,”

“I have a fucking life, Elias,” Amelia raised her voice, not caring if she looked crazy. “You think I’m going to drop everything for you? After everything you’ve done to me?”

“You could open a store over there, and we could live together in an apartment,”

“Oh. My. God,” she scoffed. “Do you hear yourself? My store is here, Elias. My people are here, and so is the guy I have a chance to date. I’m not going to leave just to make you happy,”

Her words felt like a slap to the man’s face. She didn’t want him, and he didn’t get the second chance he had begged for. He didn’t know why he had turned into such a selfish asshole by the time the conversation had shifted, but he regretted it. There was no way he could fix what he had done, and he knew it. No apology would make her change her mind.

“Amelia-”

“Loving you was a mistake,” she stated, taking a look around the room before heading towards the door. “I was just too dumb to see it,”

Her words seemed to engrave themselves inside Elias’ mind as he watched her leave, ending their conversation, and the relationship they had built as well. Elias was left on his own once more, regret making the tears that had coated his eyes fall down his cheeks.

He didn’t know what happened to him, what had gone through his head when he had proposed to her to leave the world behind and start from zero. Amelia had always been an independent woman, and he knew he had fucked up the moment her nostrils had flared. There was no coming back, though, that time.

So he made himself courage, grabbed his phone and called for a taxi. He looked at the plane ticket from the distance, grabbing it just after a few minutes of thinking before zipping up his suitcase.

Elias used the phone inside the room to order room service. He felt numb as the hums of the line rang through his head, emptying his brain of any thought. The voice of a man snapped him out of his trance, his voice cutting the clerk off. “A dry martini,”

“Loving you was a mistake,” her words still rang through his head as he ended the call, their truth making his heart clench. He was unlovable, and it was all his fault. “I was just too dumb to see it,”

Taglist: @thirstyybitch @bellaguarneri @boqvistsbabe @trashforbarzal @tonguetiedstan​ @keithseabrook27 @heatherawoowoo​ @tysonsjosty​ @besthockeyfics​

[generallypo]

in all sincerity, kim dokja makes me happy and he deserves to be so too :^(

incoherent yelling and sobbing under the cut. these fEELINGS will not be contained aaauuunnghhh. 

------

anyway i binge-read all 500+ chapters of ORV this week and i honest to god feel bad for this -- completely! fictional! aghhhh -- guy. in case you haven’t figured it out, the following is some spoilerly shit

i went in expecting a fun, brainless power trip fantasy for dudes with an isekai addiction. instead, it turns out ORV is actually a gigantic, self-deprecating prank on the entire genre itself. kdj plays more into the sad -- if high-functioning-- clown trope than the sexy, edgy, chuuni bastard type i was prepared to laugh at. there were -- gasp! -- female characters with personalities! parents (aka ADULTS who act like ADULTS) who actually survive and feature prominently! adorable children! a real sexy, edgy bastard! a power trio with amazing fashion! sexual tension and bickering! friendship! life and death bonding! 

*breathes in deeply* fouND FAMILYYYYYYY.

like, yeah, the plot around the first few arcs seems a little aimless, but the buildup is worth. the world-building is pretty decent. there’s discernible effort put into the fight scenes, and i can appreciate that. but -- but! what i stayed for were the characters -- namely, the fantastic OT3 of KDJ, HSY, and YJH -- who come together despite their initial rivalries and end up saving each other’s asses, like, every other day. granted, the other characters don’t get as much focus, and they do fall into certain character tropes.. 

but a trope done well is nothing i would gripe about. every significant character in ORV has a coherent, and more importantly, respectful take on their respective trope. maybe it’s because sing-shong is actually a married couple, but all the interactions between even minor characters are a convincing blend of awkward rambling, suggestive humor, sharp remarks, and casual banter. in other words, this cast of mostly working adults (plus a teen and two kids) talks like working adults. the relationships built throughout the story are, frankly, some of most realistic of its genre. sing-shong has managed to craft a dynamic that undoubtedly brims with fluffy fondness all around, but also drips with sarcastic tension, with unspoken urgency, with a wariness that softens into sincerity over the course of many, many chapters. it’s the kind of progression that makes even stock characters read like more than just the 2-bit villain or comrade or love interest. here, we have relationships both straightforward and not, strained or otherwise, romantically-oriented as well as decidedly the opposite -- and then numerous others scattered along the spectrum with the freedom to shift either way. 

it’s also an interesting point of note that our MC kdj actually does not end up with a stated romantic partner, much less a conventional heteroromantic harem. he gets teased about that fact from time to time, but it’s with less of the sleazy shonen locker room humor one would expect and more of the good-natured ribbing you’d find among friends or that one especially nosy auntie at the yearly family reunion. kdj is a grown ass man. in the background, i applaud his maturity, and he handles all the prodding like a champ. 

so instead of finding and fulfilling his horny, he builds himself a wealth of loving family. yeah, there are beautiful men and women around him. yeah, they unequivocally adore him. but they’re also adults, and they have priorities, too -- which are not so much finding a way to bang kdj’s brains out and more so simply keeping the damn guy alive. this is truly not ‘oblivious mc with his thirsty, sex kitten harem’. it just so happens that a guy proves himself to be unflinchingly gentle and capable in an apocalyptic setting despite his broken self-esteem, and lots of people find that attractive, romantically and platonically. 

it.. kinda makes sense? he’s a hard worker, thoughtful, and good with kids. kdj is the kind of guy you know would make a reliable partner, and anybody with eyes can plainly see and appreciate that. 

and it’s not that our MC’s a total brick wall. in fact, it’s likely the opposite, and he’s just too darned repressed to admit it. from what has been implied, kdj does indeed recognize and accept love, or at least a primitive concept of it. i like to imagine that the kind of love that he ends up seeking out simply manifests itself more easily as acceptance and safety, as warmth and a home of people to return to every day. even better, the people who surround him know this, and they give him exactly that. it’s refreshing, and honestly, really sweet.

(as a side note, i really, really do appreciate the cosmic bi energy radiating off of kdj, who canonically earns the title of being loved by all and is all but in name married to yjh and hsy. he also respects women and small children and honestly anyone who isn’t total scum to him or his family. i respect that.)

but the happy stuff aside, you know it it just ain’t ORV without the generous screaming dollop of angst. admittedly, there’s self-sacrifice, injury, lonesome wandering, more sacrifice, some epic fighting, reunion and confrontation. all of it is a lot to digest, sure, but never does it feel entirely hopeless, or truly, truly heart-clenching. ORV, up until the final act, is a mostly light read. you relax in your chair, thinking that nothing beyond this point can disturb you. 

yeah fucking right.

------

and then the beginning of the end arrives. when the squad finally break through to their ‘ending’, the scene that kind of breaks me is the reveal of the Most Ancient Dream. it ties so much thematically into the little tidbits that we get of kdj’s past, and it though it feels like almost a joke that the source of the goddamn apocalypse is a kid with bruises smeared across his skinny ass body -- it’s such a pathetic picture that it’s kinda poetic, actually. you’re left mystified but somewhat convinced, like a math problem explained halfway through. this.. child.. is a villain somehow, isn’t he?

and then 999th turn uriel speaks up, and she. just. hugs him. 

[[You are this universe’s most powerless existence, aren’t you.]] 

that. that gets me. kdj’s reaction immediately upon this revelation? absolute murder. seeing him essentially self-destruct upon realizing that all these people he’s surrounded himself with -- some who continuously proclaim their loyalty and affection for him throughout their journey, some who suffered eons of war and loss and trauma because of his existence -- not only forgive his younger self but smother him with unconditional acceptance and love is stifling, is too vulnerable and exposed and he simply can’t cope -- it’s so telling of his true mentality, of his crippling insecurity and crumpled sense of self-worth. kim dokja is a liar, through and through, so much that he fails, or perhaps refuses, to comprehend the veracity of others’ kindness and love towards himself. 

by some miracle, the events at the end of the world somehow resolve.. or so it seems. there is a departing train, a liberated team of ex-gods, and a child rousing from his slumber. in the aftermath, i am left shaking. somehow, despite the ending having been (happily?) reached, there’s still another chapter ahead. what is this witchcraft?

------

and then ah, yes -- the epilogue arc. i teetered on the edge of being critical for a little bit there -- is that display of deus ex machina, of sad, self-sacrificing nobility a bit too egregious to be acceptable? is this some wild last let-me-yank-this-outta-my-ass plot twist to drag out the chapter count? i sincerely thought that the arc before it would have been the finale. i was wrong. thank god.

anyways, as an answer to the above: no, and no. i stake my firm claim on the belief that the epilogue arc was meticulously planned out well in advance of its release, confusing and time-warpy as it is. i liked it. tremendously. even if it entirely invalidates all of kdj’s supposed development (”haha lol yeah sure i won’t sacrifice myself or anything anymore guys don’t worry about me” -- KDJ, at some point because he’s a lying rat bastard). actually, our beloved MC disappears for a large chunk of this arc, and i think it’s great. in his absence, the other characters not only go absolutely fucking nuts, but they have to figure out this new problem on their own, even if the lure of peaceful complacency in the newly saved Korea might convince them otherwise. 

and then the whole time paradox thing comes around. yjh goes to space, hsy saves the only life she can, and kdj grows up. the crew waits, holding onto their hope even if it bleeds them dry. sing-shong does a damn good job of illustrating their fraying calm, their lurking madness, the unseen but pervasive depression that seeps in from kdj’s absence. the kids lose their father, lhs and jhw lose their reliable leader figure, ysa loses a best friend and confidant, lsk -- as distant as she pretends to be from her son -- loses her only child. and then there’s hsy and yjh , who are essentially bereft of the other half of their existences. their pain is palpable, is grounded in the hopeless, gnawing frustration of an utterly meaningless victory. emotionally, ORV hits all the right -- if agonizing -- beats.

however, a story can’t sustain itself just through its pathos. i’m happy to say that ORV doesn’t drop the ball after the first milestone, and after all the hurt, the characters do leap straight back into action. even better, the plot holes actually do get patches, and the poetic cycle of writer, protagonist, and reader comes full circle by making use of all those supposedly throwaway characters from the myriad world lines. 

at the end of the road, there is a distinct sense of unity, of a delicate but undeniable cohesion to the world lines and their origins. sing-shong lets us guess a little here at the finish, but there’s just enough information to feel hopeful. maybe there never had been a definite start -- or finish -- to the story of kdj company, and... that’s okay. everybody ends up where they were meant to be, where they fought and struggled to reach. it’s.. almost like a happily ever after, if we’re allowed to dream of that.

------

now, i realize, this was all an orchestrated maneuver.

i’ll take it.

to me, all of this work sounds like someone put some serious thought into this behemoth of a plot. it cements the entire original premise of the story. it suggests -- but never explicitly confirms! -- the possibility that breaking free of the cycle is possible through the exact same system that sustains it. it’s terribly interesting -- and inspirational! with all the dramatic revelations and life-threatening scenarios  and the cast’s resigned acceptance of them that essentially make up ORV’s entire mood, there’s still that last hint of rebellious and righteous anger that lights up the whole damn nebula. it’s like the kdj company blasting away at the heavens just to yell into the nether: we’re not looking for the happy end, but the free one. stay alive.

it’s subtle, and yet it’s such an emotional gut punch. i came away with the most ruinous, frustrating, bittersweet sense of longing in ages. i pined. for these fictional darlings. god, i am weak.

so. yeah. ORV is pretty good. flawed, but ambitious and impressively thought out.  i’m stoked that the webtoon is making pretty good progress, even if it’ll take an eternity and a half to meet that monstrous chapter count. i’m still gonna follow it. hell yeah. 

------

(by the way the idea that secretive plotter and co are literally gonna take care of and raise baby kdj and spoil him and be the best friggin family a kid could ever want does things to me. protect him. he’s suffered too much. let at least one worldline’s version of him know happiness. and actually, aLL OF THEM DESERVE DOMESTIC BLISS TOGETHER IN A BIG OL MANSION WITH SUN AND FRESH AIR AND TENDER FAMILY MOMENTS UGH)

------

and there you have it, folks. you made it to the end. in the far, far distance, i’m cheering you on and crying my eyes out in gratitude. thanks for tuning in!

[ragewerthers]

Relaxation Therapy

Summary:  Iwa has gotten himself so caught up in his paper that he feels he doesn't have time to relax. Luckily his boyfriends know just the way to get him to listen to reason. A little relaxation therapy is definitely in order!

A/n: Hello there!

This is written for a prompt sent to me from @lady-namo​!

She asked for:

'matsuhanaiwaoi? iwaizumi is really, REALLY stressed by whatever and they try to relax him. actually i don't mind how exactly you do it, i'd just be happy with teasy af mattsun!'

This was so much fun to write as I've never gotten to write these four before, but they are ridiculous and amazing to write banter between! I hope that you enjoy it, my friend!

You can also read on AO3 at: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28599321

Enjoy! :D

Word Count: 3937

--------------------------

Iwa growled in frustration as he ran a hand through his hair, staring hard at the readings laid out before him on the kitchen table.

If this civilization wasn’t already lost to history, he would be cursing the ancient Minoans as the texts he looked over spoke of them.  How dare they be so god damn interesting that he decided to write his history paper on their mysterious disappearance?  How dare they lure him into trying to read through dusty old texts that only offered up the same three conclusions each and every time?!  Three conclusions does not a paper make!

With another deep growl he let his head fall to the table with a resounding thud that he immediately regretted more than the Minoans existence.  His pen had been in just the perfect spot for his forehead to land against, sending a nice little shockwave of pain through his forehead and making him reel back in his chair with a shout.  Sadly the force that he’d pushed himself away with was enough to send said chair tilting backwards at lightning speeds and his life flashed before his eyes.

Sadly the only thing his mind supplied was the Minoans.

The bastards.

Squeezing his eyes shut he waited for the cold, hard impact of the floor, but soon just found himself suspended mid-air.

Slowly, almost fearfully, he let his eyes peek open only to be met with the amused and gentle smile of Mattsun.

“Issei?” Iwa said a little dumbly, having thought his boyfriends were still out of the apartment for a grocery run.  When Oikawa was involved this usually meant that the trip could last hours and it felt like they’d only just left a few minutes ago.  Oikawa shouting something sassy from the hall, Hana rolling his eyes and Mattsun promising that they wouldn’t lose Tooru… again.

Now, it seemed, they had all returned just in time to see the Minoans attempting to take him out with his own pen.

“The one and only.  Appears we didn’t get back too late for me to be your knight in shining armor, Hajime,” the taller man said lightly, ducking down to press a careful kiss to the red line already starting to appear over Iwa’s forehead.

“What was that thud we heard when we came in, Iwa?” Hana called, carrying in at least four grocery bags collected on his arms and trying to carefully place them on the table and avoid Iwa’s work.

“Yeah, Iwa-chan!  Mattsun literally jumped the sofa to get in here when he heard you yelp,” Oikawa said with a teasing smirk, putting his own single bag of shopping right on top of Iwa’s work and spreading out his papers even more.

Matsukawa quirked an eyebrow at Oikawa before carefully setting Iwa’s chair back down on the floor.

“This coming from the man who literally elbowed Hana in the face trying to unlock the door when we heard the commotion in the hall.  Don’t act all cool and collected now,” Mattsun teased, watching as Oikawa’s ears tinged red and he puffed his cheeks out into a pout.

“I did no such thing!  I know Iwa-chan is more than capable of handling himself in any situation,” Oikawa huffed, turning around and heading back toward the living room to drop off his coat, scarf and shoes.

“I thought he was going to cry,” Hana whispered to Iwa as he passed by with a few frozen pizza’s in hand, apparently deciding to put away their frozens before taking off his things.  Though he also seemed incapable of dropping a kiss to Iwa’s brow before continuing on and making the man's cheeks warm up more at all of this attention.  Though the thought of Oikawa blubbering in the hallway did make him chuckle a bit.

Soon Iwa felt a strong hand lightly starting to massage the back of his neck and the chuckling instantly quieted down into a soft hum of content.  Closing his eyes, he tilted his head forward reflexively, feeling the way Mattsun’s hand worked its way up to his hairline before soothing gently circles back down toward his shoulder.

“You still didn’t answer the question though, Hajime,” Mattsun said softly as he watched Iwa slowly melt in front of him from the simple contact.  “But if I had to guess, I’d say this paper is putting up a fight?”

Iwa gave a little nod, though he tried to stay as still as possible to enjoy the gentle attention he was receiving.  “The Minoans have decided to haunt me from their graves.  But be careful what you think of them.  They’ll attack you with pens and tipped over chairs,” he grumbled, getting a little snort from Hana who was somewhere near the cupboards now.

“They also seem to be able to turn your muscles into nothing but knots and stone,” Matsukawa murmured softly, bringing his other hand up to start massaging along Hajimes shoulders properly and earning himself a deep groan of pain and contentment.  “Why don’t you take a break?  When the ghosts of dead civilizations start to attack, it’s usually a sign you need to take a step back.”

“Did I hear that right?  Iwa-chan is allowing papers to attack him now?” Oikawa cooed as he came back in, grabbing one of the other grocery bags and the table and carrying it to the counter.  “That’s what turned Issei into a track star?”

“And you into a panicked mother hen?” Hana teased, getting a swat to his arm with a bag of milk bread Oikawa had moments before had cuddled to his chest like a gift from heaven.

Iwa blinked his eyes open to give him a little half-hearted glare.  “No, Shitty-kawa.  I just… got a little stuck in my thesis and it got away from me a bit.  But I’ll still conquer this paper.  I just have to focus more,” he mumbled before giving a little whimper as Mattsun’s fingers kneaded deeper into the muscles of his shoulder.

“Hajime, I can actually feel your muscles coiling up again as you speak,” Mattsun murmured in his calming baritone.  “I think it would do you some good to take a small break with us.  Just a little breather to get your thoughts refocused?” “I can’t,” Iwa said quietly, a little scowl starting to reappear over his features.  “I only have a couple of days to get this all sorted out and I know that if I keep going I’ll be able to break through this little writer's block I have.  I’m sorry, but… maybe later once I get some thoughts on paper I can take a break with you all.”  Leaning forward slightly, Iwa gently broke the wonderful contact of Mattsun’s hands from his shoulders. He could hear a little exhale of air from behind him as he picked his pen back up and knew that wasn’t what the man had wanted to hear, but it’s what he needed to do. Reaching forward he began to try and reorganize his papers from the mess Oikawa had made of them.

“Oh Mattsun-kun.  You should know better than trying to get through to Iwa with gentle words,” Oikawa said as he drew closer to the table.

“Yeah, Mattsun,” Hana teased from his spot by the sink, turning to watch with a little smirk playing over his lips, his arms crossed over his chest.  “You know that Hajime is only just slightly less stubborn than Tooru.”

Iwa grumbled at that, hunching his shoulders to try and ignore his boyfriends talking about him as if he wasn’t there.  ‘ Now where did that pen go? ’

“I mean… you’re not wrong,” Oikawa chuckled and Iwa could hear him moving around the table to stand next to Issei.  “But… if there’s something I’ve learned about our sweet Iwa-chan it’s that there are better ways of getting your point across.”

Sadly, Iwa was now starting to get back into what he hoped was a groove for this paper and didn’t notice the shared look between his three ridiculous partners.

“That’s right,” Mattsun said, his voice still sounding measured even as the hint of amusement tinged his words.

“Gentle words aren’t enough,” Hanamaki agreed, his voice sounding closer and making Iwa hunch more into himself.  God, why didn’t he grab his earbuds to drown out these idiots ?

“That’s right,” Oikawa’s voice purred, making the back of Iwa’s neck prickle slightly.  “Hajime needs to be persuaded out of his bullheadedness…,”

“Pfft… you’re one to talk, Trashy-kawAHAHA!” Iwa startled as he felt two strong hands send a couple quick squeezes against his lower ribs, making him jolt out of his seat and sending some of his books and papers tumbling down to the floor.  Turning around he saw Oikawa’s hands still extended forward, Hana and Mattsun flanking either side of him with twin looks of mischief and determination on their faces.

The world seemed to pause in time for a few heartbeats as Iwa’s eyes looked over the three of them… his mind racing to catch up with what was happening when all of a sudden the moment of stillness was broken with two words.

“Get him.”

Hana and Mattsuns smiles turned devious as each of them took flight.  Taking off from either side of Oikawa to race around the table toward Iwa and looking for all the world like those evil winged hell monkeys the wicked witch of the west had sent off after Dorothy.

Though to be fair, Oikawa’s accompanying menacing cackle would’ve even sent a shiver down that witch’s spine! Iwa instantly turned and ran out of the kitchen and toward the hall, his heart beating thunderously in his chest as he realized what sort of doom awaited him if he were caught.

“Fly my pretties!  Fly!!!” Oikawa cried from a little further down the hall as Iwa heard Mattsun and Hana slowly starting to catch up to him as they neared the living room.

Oh yeah… Oikawa was never allowed to watch the Wizard of Oz again!

“Get the hell away from me!” Iwa called over his shoulder, only hearing a rumbling laugh far closer than he expected.

“Sorry, Hajime… not gonna happen!” Mattsun called back, his fingers just brushing the back of Hajime’s shirt and making Iwa yelp as he raced around one side of the coffee table… only to find the pair once more splitting up to give chase.

“Damn it!” Iwa shouted, though he was surprised to find the barest hint of a smile tugging up at the corners of his lips from this stupidity!  “Kn-Knock it off!  I’m trying to get some work done!  OOF!”

Iwa had glanced behind him for only a second and that was apparently all it took for Oikawa to make his grand entrance, quickly catching Iwa up in his embrace as he attempted to make a break for it toward their bedroom.

“Oh, what have we here?” Oikawa cooed in that far too smug voice, practically bearhugging Iwa to his chest.  “Why... I think it’s someone in desperate need of a study break!”

“I told you!  I don’t neheheed a breahahahak!  AH!  Stahp it!” Iwa instantly bit down on his lower lip as growly giggles already started to bubble up from his chest.  Oikawa’s fingers dug lightly into that spot under his lower ribs making his legs already feel like jelly as his body tried to twist away from the tingly touch. “Was that grumpy and sassy Iwa just now?” Hana teased as he and Mattsun drew closer.

“M’nahahat!” Iwa giggled despite his best efforts, a little yelp escaping as he felt a third hand reaching up to lightly tickle against the side of his neck as another hand began to squeeze near his hip.

“What was that, Iwa-chan?  Did you just say you weren’t being grumpy?  Because I’m positive I heard you trying to defy me and not take a break,” Oikawa murmured back dangerously as Iwa tried to weakly swat at the hands seeming to come at him from all angles.

“Stahahahap it!  I… I hahahave to gehehet back!” Iwa gasped out between giggles, soon finding himself being lifted off the ground as another pair of arms wrapped around him.

“Oh no.  I think you are in desperate need of a bit of relaxation therapy,” Mattsun said softly, seeming to be the one doing most of the lifting now before Iwa found himself unceremoniously dropped onto their sofa.

Before he could sit up he found Oikawa already straddling his thighs, Mattsun pinning his wrists overhead and Hana settled on his calves.

“And if I remember correctly, a little bit of laughter can go a long way in helping someone relax,” Mattsun teased.  The look in his eyes instantly making Iwa try to wriggle his hands free from the former blockers grasp.

“No!  R-Really!  You guys don’t have to do thi-HIHIhihihis!  Hahahana nohohoho!“ Iwa gasped out as he felt the light scribbling of fingers against his arches, his legs trying to weakly kick out, but with Oikawa and Hana both settled on his lower half he knew he wasn’t going anywhere soon. Oikawa turned to catch a glimpse of Hana’s focused attention on Iwa’s poor feet, chuckling at the reaction it was already causing.  Turning around he caught Issei’s eyes and gave him a devilish smile as he listened to Iwa’s giggles already bubbling up so sweetly. “Well, Mattsun-kun… we can’t let Hana have all the fun.  We need to be here to help our sweet, Iwa-chan too!” he teased, his fingers sneaking under Hajime’s shirt to start lightly fluttering along the sides of his tum, just barely scribbling as they moved lower and lower toward his hips.

“NO!  NO nahahahat my hihihips, Tooruhuhuhu!” Iwa squeaked out, his body already starting to shimmy side to side in the hope to block some of what was to come. “Oh, Hajime,” Mattsun crooned in his deep voice.  “I think you have so much more to be worried about then just your hips.” Iwa only had a moment to try to register what Mattsun was saying before he felt the man's fingers settling on one particular rib on his left side.  His eyes instantly widened and he began to squirm more as he knew what was coming. “WaitwaitwaitwaAHAHAHAGAHAHAD!  NOAHAHAHA!” Iwa instantly cried out as Mattsun began massaging and vibrating his fingers deeply against that particular rib.  Years ago he had cracked it during a match and a bad collison and somehow upon healing it had managed to become far too sensitive to even the lightest touches.  He regretted ever letting these bastards find out about this particular weakness!

“I think Iwa is really enjoying his study break!  Look at how big he’s smiling!” Mattsun called over Hajime’s laughter, bringing his hand up to flutter against one of his exposed armpits and making the poor man try to tug his arms free once more.

“Look at that sweet blush!  Oh Iwa-chan I wish I had my phone to capture this!” Oikawa crooned softly, his hands moving to settle into the little dips of Hajimes hips, his thumbs starting to rub deep, quick circles right against the hyper ticklish spot and nearly sending himself and Hana flying off the sofa with the way Iwa jolted.

“NO PLEHEHEHEASE!  I CAHAN’T!  I CAHAHAN’T!” Iwa cackled wildly as Oikawa’s thumbs found a rhythm that had him bouncing what little he could on the sofa.  His head was tossed back against one of the throw pillows and his entire body felt like one giant sensitive spot. Hana snickered from where he was lightly tracing his fingers over Iwa’s socked arches, making the man's toes curl and his feet twitch from the light contact.  “Can’t what?  Escape?  We know that already, silly Iwa,” Hana teased, finding a nice little spot right in the center of his partners arches that seemed to make the poor guy shriek. “Oh!  I think I definitely have the best spot!”

Tooru huffed from his spot on Hajime, looking down at the mans face already turning pink from laughter.  His own hands had paused as the light tickles to his feet from Hanamaki seemed to be driving him into hysterical giggles.

“That’s not fair, Hajime!  How come you let Hana have your best spot?  You always told me it was your hips!  Were you lying to me, Iwa-chan?” he asked with mock suspicion, narrowing his eyes and fighting a smile as his hands gave Iwa’s hips a few warning squeezes.

“NO!  NO Tooruhuhu!  I… I didn’t lie! I dihihihihidn’t!  AHahahagahahad!” Iwa cackled, turning his head into his outstretched arm to try and hide a snort that escaped him when the squeezes turned into scribbling fingers that raced up his sides before quick and nimble fingers began to vibrate over his tum.

“Hmmm… I don’t know.  Sounds like this is also a good spot!  Have you been hiding them on me?!” Oikawa gasped dramatically, though this time he didn’t bother hiding the soft smile he had on his face as Iwa laughed so brightly and openly.

Mattsun had paused his own tickling as well as he watched Iwa losing himself to his laughter from the other two.  His goal had been to make Iwa relax and really this was already having the desired effect.  Iwa’s brow was no longer furrowed in grumpiness, his expression soft and bright with laughter pouring out of him.

However, this didn’t mean that he didn’t still want to truly drive home how much Iwa deserved this and how much he needed to listen to his boyfriends every once in a while.

“Oh, Hajime.  I think you were keeping secrets from us,” Mattsun teased as he lightly fluttered his fingers against his right armpit and then his left, making Iwa jump with each soft attack, his giggles always intensifying when he did it.

“Nehehehever!  I w-wouldn’t!  I prohohomihihihihise!” Iwa squeaked out, his laughter already starting to become quieter as he neared his limit.  Unlike Tooru, who seemed to gain energy during their tickle attacks on him, Iwa always seemed to have one big burst of energy before becoming absolutely compliant in their arms.

Mattsun chuckled at that and shook his head.  “Hmm… I don’t know… you’re getting pretty jumpy with these tickles here.  I think the best way to make sure you aren’t hiding any more secrets from your boyfriends is to attack all these good spots at once.  What do you guys think?” he asked, watching as Oikawa and Hana both perked up with bright smiles, their resounding ‘YES!’s’ easily covering up Iwa’s frantically giggled ‘NO!’

“I think the majority wins!  Ready, Hajime?” Mattsun murmured fondly, though judging from the way the man was already giggling so hard his cheeks were turning pink he knew he wasn’t about to get a proper answer.  “Then here we go, on the count of three!  One!” he counted, fingers wiggling just above Iwa’s torso and making him shiver.

“Two!” Hana called, letting both of his index fingers zip up Iwa’s soles in warning of what was to come, a startled squeal and wriggle the only answer from Hajime.

Oikawa glanced down at his Iwa, watching as the man peeked his eyes out from where he had been trying to hide against his arm, his smile bright, carefree, but still with that little bit of challenge behind them.

Oikawa’s smile grew at that in return.  Never one to take a challenge lightly.

“Three!” he cried, and instantly, all of their hands were on the attack… and Iwa lost his mind.

Hanamaki’s fingers scribbled and traced all of his soles, moving from his arches to under his toes and drawing out the ugliest snorts Iwa had ever heard himself make. Tooru’s fingers exacted lethal attacks against his stomach, sides and hips.  His fingers would massage and vibrate against the bones of his hips before moving up to massage deep circles against his lower ribs and then moving to scuttle around and vibrate against his sides and tum making him bounce and jump at the deeply ticklish touches.

And finally there was Mattsun, the instigator to all of this if Iwa had to name someone.  He’d abandoned his hold on his wrists to use both hands to attack his upper ribs and armpits with fluttering fingers and scribbles that had made Iwa shriek before dissolving into wild and carefree laughter.

His arms had instantly clamped down on Mattsun’s hands and he tried for all his worth to try and wiggle away or curl into the sofa, but there was no escaping three evil boyfriends hellbent on teasing him into relaxation and oblivion all in one.

“NOHOHOAHAHAHA!  PLEHEHEHEASE I… I CAHAHAHAN’T!  IHIHIT TIHIHICKLES SO BAHAHAHAD!” Iwa cried out through his hysterical laughter, his mind completely taken over by nothing but ticklish sensations and absolutely nothing left to remind him of his earlier troubles, the Minoans, the paper… nothing but how terribly his boyfriends were wrecking and how much it tickled! “Do you think Iwa’s had enough?” Mattsun chuckled, already starting to slow his tickles as Oikawa and Hana both smiled softly at Iwa.  Even their fingers started to turn from terrible tickles to lightly soothing over those spots.

“I think Iwa has learned his lesson,” Oikawa cooed softly, his hands soothing against his boyfriends sides as Iwa slowly regained back some sanity, giggling and panting even as he felt the tickles starting to subside.

“L-Lehehesson?” he giggled, voice a little hoarse from his laughter as Mattsun nodded. “Yes.  To listen to your boyfriends.  To take a break.  To enjoy some relaxation therapy.  To not take your papers so seriously they almost hurt you,” Mattsun listed off, carefully removing his hands from under Iwa’s arms and making him shiver before starting to sooth his fingers through his messy hair.  “This is really all we wanted to achieve, Hajime.  For you to have a moment to just let loose and step away from those things that were stressing you.  Apparently we can only get that across that stubborn brain of yours with some well placed tickles.” Iwa felt his cheeks flushing a bit, giving a little hum and closing his eyes as his breathing started to calm more and more as he felt the gentle touches now moving over him.

“I’m… sorry I didn’t listen sooner,” he chuckled, melting a little more as Oikawa began to lightly massage down his arms and Hana moved, lifting Iwa’s legs so that he could sneak to sit on the sofa, letting them rest in his lap so he could soothe along his feet, ankles and calves as well.  

“No need to apologize, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa murmured softly, ducking down to press a few soft kisses against his boyfriends pink cheeks before carefully moving off of him, sitting beside the sofa as he watched Iwa starting to relax more and more.  “Besides… we achieved what we wanted.  You’re relaxing and taking a breather now, right?  So we’re really all winners here.”

Iwa gave a gentle, tired chuckle at that, his eyes already closing as he was pampered so lovingly by them all.

“Re… Remind me… to do this… more often,” Iwa murmured, his voice already growing softer as sleep carefully called to him after his intense tickle attack.

“I think we can do that,” Mattsun murmured fondly, giving Iwa a soft tickle behind his ear, making the man giggle softly before his breathing evened out and soft snores could soon be heard.

If this was the end result of their efforts to get Iwa to relax, they would definitely have no problem reminding him time and time again.

[like-rain-or-confetti]

Who Knew? (Demetri Volturi x Reader)

Who Knew - P!nk

You took my hand You showed me how You promised me you'd be around

Demetri came into your life with a charming smile. You had no choice but to be in awe of his beauty- he and his coven. Just like it stunned you with every other vampire you met. However Demetri told you why that was. It was apart of the vampire genes, to lure in prey. 

He had said it was his pleasure to meet you but you couldn't help that the pleasure was yours alone.  In fact, you were almost certain that Demetri said that to everyone. A charmer, just as his smile had told you when he first met you. 

Slowly, he broke through any walls you set. Trickling into every crack of those walls until it was pointless to have the wall. He acknowledged your hesitation around him and his kind. He even pointed out you felt a little more safer with the Cullen's. It was understandable but he wouldn't hurt you. In time you'd see that. He told you more about his kind and his backstory. He was honest from what you could figure out. Just when you had begun to somewhat consider him a friend, there was talk about him and the other Volturi leaving. To your relief, he promised you it wouldn't be the last you'd see of him. You were still human after all.

I took your words and I believed In everything, you said to me

He told you the Volturi's perspective upon the Cullen's actions and suddenly the Volturi didn't seem so villainous as the Cullen's had made them out to be. It led to you questioning him as to why you were still alive. You were human and knew the secret. Demetri would simply smile at you. "Not for long, darling." It became apparent why Demetri was so truthful. In all honesty, he had no reason to lie. "Would you rather I lied to you?" Demetri asked. "No." You said firmly. He smiled. "That's good, I'd find it difficult to lie to you. I am quite fond of you." You scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous. I'm nothing special, especially to you." Demetri's eyes gleamed. "My dear, you are very incorrect but...there's another time for that."

If someone said three years from now You'd be long gone I'd stand up and punch them out 'Cause they're all wrong I know better 'Cause you said forever and ever Who knew?

"You know this can't last forever." Bella said quietly. She continued as you narrowed your eyes on her. "He'll have to go home eventually and you haven't got any intention to go with him." "Yet." You reminded her. "I will one day, just not now. If I leave now there will be questions." "I get that. I just...worry. I don't want you to get hurt." You scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous Bella, I'll be fine. Besides, it won't be for long." You smiled brightly. 

You never anticipated how difficult it could be to leave your human life behind. Yet when their was an opportunity, you hesitated. Bella made it all look so easy and so hearing those words from her set a fire of anger on your chest. One you had to fight back every single time. You didn't doubt your feelings for Demetri, not even once. So why did it seem to be the case to everyone else? If anyone knew Demetri and yourself better than anyone it was you and Demetri. Demetri promised you forever, and forever is exactly what you'd get.

Remember when we were such fools And so convinced and just too cool

Many of the Volturi, Caius especially, thought you and Demetri were fools. Yet somehow, you couldn't bring yourself to care and neither could Demetri for that matter. No one could ever tell you two otherwise. In his eyes, the bond was too strong fight off and on your eyes, no one else understood. It was the perfect formula for you and Demetri against the world.

I wish I could touch you again I wish I could still call you friend I'd give anything

Now that you and Demetri had been apart for months. You wanted nothing more than to be with him again. You understood he was busy but how could you not miss him? You missed the way he held you, even down to the simplest of details as the feeling of his jacket against your skin. Sometimes, you couldn't help but wonder if it was gave been easier if you two weren't mates, if you were simply friends, would that have made things easier between both the Volturi and the Cullen's? Would you have been as separated for as long as you had been?

When someone said count your blessings now 'Fore they're long gone I guess I just didn't know how I was all wrong They knew better Still you said forever and ever Who knew?

You didn't anticipate being apart for so long. You tried to remain positive, anything to hold back the emptiness and constant reminder that Demetri wasn't around. You tried to acknowledge just because he wasn't, doesn't mean it's all bad. There was plenty of good things in your life other than Demetri. It was all about perspective, what you chose to focus on. Although you couldn't help but recognise that they were right in the end. The Cullen's, Bella and even the Volturi warned you that this was coming and you were too in love to heed their words. Only one thing mattered in the end. Demetri promised you forever.

I'll keep you locked in my head Until we meet again Until we, until we meet again And I won't forget you my friend What happened?

From the day you parted, Demetri would keep you in his memory. Locked away in his head, safe and with him. He'd often imagine you before him, dressed in the same clothes you wore that day with a heartfelt smile. He'd raise a hand to your cheek and feel the heat radiating from your skin. He'd hold you as you said the most strangest of things. Things that never always called for an answer. "If a dream is an experience, doesn't that make it real?" You said that often and Demetri couldn't help but wonder if maybe that was his mind trying to repair the empty hole in his chest now that you were apart for who knew how long. You'd stay there until the day you came back to him, locked in his memories and imagination. Always meeting him with that same lovely smile he had grown addicted to. You wouldn't be forgotten, not even for a moment. Never. Thinking back to those times together, he couldn't help but wonder what had happened to bring the two of you divided for so long. Although he'd wait forever and a piece of him, despite you being human, knew that you would too. 

If someone said three years from now You'd be long gone I'd stand up and punch them out 'Cause they're all wrong and

Regardless of what anyone said, he had promised you forever and he meant it. Anyone who ever got in the way would be annihilated. Anyone who thought otherwise would be proven wrong because they were. If he had to break a few bones or rip off a few limbs to prove a point.. then so be it.

That last kiss I'll cherish Until we meet again And time makes It harder I wish I could remember

When Demetri had a spare peaceful moment alone, his mind often drifted towards you. He thought about you a lot but tried to keep it to a minimum whilst on duty.However, when those peaceful moments arrived. His mind wandered to you. What you were doing, what you were thinking, did you think about him as much as he thought of you? He'd think back to that last kiss he had shared with you. The feel of your lips against his. He'd run his thumb across his bottom lip, as the memories ran through his mind. He remembered every one. However the last kiss you two had shared was more important. 

It was the kiss that you both shared knowing that neither of you knew when you'd see each other again. He cherished that kiss every single day and he would continue to do so until you met again. Although as each day passed, he wished he'd remember that difficult it was to be away from you. Time wasn't always forgiving to a vampire, it might have made something easier but in this particular situation, time only made it harder.

But I keep Your memory You visit me in my sleep My darling Who knew?

Even if Demetri was miles away, you kept him in your heart, day and night. You'd miss him throughout the day, even within the minutes before you went to sleep. Although when you fell asleep, he was with you again, giving you that charming smile. Sometimes you'd dream that he was there with you as you slept, watching him smile down at you. You didn't know when you'd next see your love again. Although you'd wait for him, your comfort being the memories you both shared. Neither of you knowing at the time you'd be apart.

[rowyn-writes]

Dying From a Broken Heart

Part Two of Confidence

Warnings: Violence, angst, language, arguing, blood, fluff

Pairings: Jack x Winchester!Reader

Characters: Jack Kline, Sam Winchester, Dean Winchester, Castiel, Rowena, Eros, Reader

Word Count: 3.1k

Summary: While you and Jack are at the motel, you make a shocking discovery. You're not dealing with a pack of werewolves like you thought, but Eros, God of Love and Lust. You finally figure out the connection between Eros and the victims. . . Only to find out that you're next.

You and Jack were still doing research when Sam and Dean came back. "Okay, so get this." You said, turning around in your chair. "Every year, six people go missing and are found dead with their hearts torn out."

"A ritual?" Sam inquired.

"Exactly what I was thinking, dear brother." You grinned. "Now, big city like this, six missing people is something you'd hardly notice."

"Yeah, but why would a werewolf preform a ritual?" Dean asked.

"That's what Jack and I kept asking ourselves." You said, looking over at your boyfriend. "Why in the world would a Purebred werewolf need to preform some kind of ritual?" You stood up, rummaging around in your backpack for a book. You gave a triumphant smile as you held up your Greek Mythology book.

"Eros. God of Love and Lust." You opened the book to the page that was dedicated to the god.

"But their hearts were torn out." Dean furrowed his eyebrows. "What would Eros want with hearts?"

"It's a sacrifice for him." You informed the men. "Think about it. None of the vics had bites or even scratches. At first, I thought it was a Purebred werewolf because the attacks didn't line up with the lunar cycle. But the more I thought about it, the more that this makes sense. People used to worship Eros and make sacrifices for him, but now hardly anyone believes in him anymore. So Eros goes out and gets his own sacrifices."

Sam and Dean seemed impressed while Jack seemed proud. "Okay." Dean nodded. "That means that since he failed with the last victim, he's going kill again."

You tried your hardest to think of some kind of connection with all the deceased. You knew there had to be something in common since they were dealing with a god. They seemed to be picky with their sacrifices.

"What are you thinking about, Y/n?" Jack asked, resting his hand on top of yours, something that didn't go unnoticed by your brothers. Dean was about to say something when Sam stomped on his foot, earning a grunt from Dean.

"I'm trying to find the connection between everyone. Because I know there has to be one." You picked at a tear in your jeans while you tried to connect the dots.

Then it hit you like a ton of bricks. You stood up abruptly, startling the men in the room. "I know what Eros looks in for a sacrifice." You stated, grabbing your notepad to look at the stuff you had written down. "Everyone we interviewed said the victims just had a big announcement. The 55 year old man was celebrating his 30th anniversary with his wife, the 28 year old woman was newly engaged, the 45 year old man just started dating again after his wife died, and so on until the fifteen year old girl. She had just gotten her first girlfriend when she was attacked."

"What are you saying, Y/n?" Jack questioned.

"I'm saying that Eros is targeting people with an immense amount of pure love. That's what he's looking for!"

"Wow." Sam said, looking at his little sister in admiration. "That's genius, Y/n." He patted her on the shoulder, only to furrow his eyebrows. "What's that on your collarbone?"

You gave Sam a confused look as you headed to the bathroom. There, on your collarbone was a dark red circle. You sucked in a sharp breath.

"I know who the next target is." You told the men.

"Who?" Jack seemed worried by the look on your face.

"It's me."

.

. .

. . .

"How did this even happen?!" Sam exclaimed.

"I don't know!" You defended yourself, your voice raised slightly. "The whole time we were out I was with you guys. Jack and I never left the motel room while you two were gone."

"That is true." Jack nodded. "Y/n and I stayed in here and she agreed to be my girlfri-"

You put your hand over his mouth. "Now's not the time, babe." You could feel Dean glaring a hole through you and Jack.

"Okay, let's think about this for a second." You said, trying to calm everyone down. "Maybe this is a good thing."

"A good thing?!" Dean roared. "Y/n, how in the hell is this a good thing?!"

"Dean." Sam hissed, cuffing his brother. "Calm down and let Y/n talk." You threw Sam a grateful look.

"This way we can lure Eros out, and kill him. Apparently all it takes is a wooden stake dipped in lambs blood."

"I don't like this plan." Jack muttered.

"See! Thank you." Dean said, clearly pleased with the Nephilim.

"Jack-"

"No, Y/n. You're not going to put yourself in danger just to kill this god. I won't allow it."

"Oh for the love of-" You sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose. "Eros is coming for me either way. It's better to be prepared and have a plan rather than to just sit here and let him tear my heart out!"

"Don't talk like that!" Jack insisted angrily. You understood that he was worried about you, but you were a grown woman and could make your own decisions.

"It's inevitable, Jack." You said softly. "Eros will come for me. We know from the victims that he kills them 24 hours after being marked. I have maybe 18 hours at best."

Dean was furious. "This is your fault!" He growled at Jack. "You're the reason my baby sister is being targeted!"

Jack looked taken aback. "I didn't want this for Y/n." He said sincerely. "If I could trade places with her, I would."

"That's the problem!"

"Dean-" You started, only to get interrupted by your oldest brother.

"You think you're in love with her, but you're not! It's unnatural. Nephilim, they can't fall in love. All those stupid movies that Y/n and Sam let you watch made you think you're in love with her. You can't love Y/n."

You felt your throat close up, hurt by Dean's words. "Is it that hard to think someone could love me?" You whispered.

Dean's hard glare softened as his eyes landed on you. "Of course not, sweetheart. But Jack. . . He's not right for you."

"Oh, and you know what's best for me?" You growled. Your hurt turned to annoyance and anger.

"Yes, I do. I'm your brother."

Sam and Jack gave each other looks. It was bad when Sam and Dean argued, but when you and Dean argued, it was catastrophic.

"And John was my dad, and he never knew what was best for me! That doesn't mean anything!"

"Oh, so family doesn't mean anything to you?"

"Dean, come on man, you know that's not what she meant." Sam tried to reason.

"Stay out of it, Sam!" Dean yelled.

You could tell Sam was growing annoyed with Dean. His frown deepened, his eyes hardened, and his hand began to twitch.

"No! I won't stay out of it. I am tired of you mistreating Jack and Y/n!"

"Oh, I do not mistreat them!" Dean argued. "Jack, do I mistreat you?" Jack seemed uncomfortable being put on the spot. You knew he looked up to Dean, but Dean had also said some rather hurtful things about Jack.

While Sam, Dean, and Jack continued their argument, you were able to slip away unnoticed.

You were crying now, the thought of dying scared the crap out of you. And your brothers and Jack arguing didn't help the situation.

You looked around the parking lot, looking for something to hotwire. You came across a black Harley Davidson Dyna Super Glide Sport. And the dumbass was stupid enough to leave the keys in the ignition.

You started the engine, listening to the bike purr. You threw back the kickstand and began driving. You didn't know where you were going, all you knew was that you had to get out of there.

You weren't stupid, of course, you had your gun and a silver dagger just in case.

You planted both of your feet on the ground at a stop light. You were still crying, and you couldn't figure out why. You were just so angry.

You ended up stopping at a small dive bar outside of Little Rock. There were a total of ten people there, and most were men.

You flag down the bartender and order a beer. Around twenty minutes later, a man slide in the seat beside you. He said nothing as he ordered a drink. The man seemed so familiar to you, but you couldn't put your finger on it. He had curly, dark brown hair, and beautiful blue-grey eyes. He was handsome in all aspects of the word. But he was nothing compared to Jack.

"I've never seen you here before." He said to you.

"Oh, I uh - I'm just passing through." You gave him a tight smile.

You felt your phone buzz in your pocket. You grabbed it, looking down to see that Dean's as calling you. You sent him to voicemail, something that was bound to piss him off.

"Guy troubles?" The man inquired.

"More like brother troubles." You laughed. "I'm Y/n, by the way."

"Elliott." He smiled, showing off a gleaming row of white teeth. "So, what's going on with your brother?"

"Brother's, actually. They treat me like a baby, just because they're older than me."

"That's what brothers are supposed to do." Elliott shrugged. "They're supposed to look out for you, protect you." Your phone rang again, this time, it was Sam. You sent him to voicemail as well and put your phone on silent.

"Yeah, I guess." You agreed. "But -" You cut yourself off, not wanting to dump all your feeling onto this random stranger.

"But what?" He asked, curious to what your response was.

"There's this guy, this amazing, wonderful, sweet and funny guy. He cares about me, and I care about him, but my oldest brother, he thinks we shouldn't be with each other." You confessed, taking a sip of your beer.

"Is he respectful towards you?" You nodded. "He cares about you and treats you right?" You nodded once more. "Then what's the problem?"

"I don't know." You mumbled. "My brother just doesn't trust him, even though he has no reason not to."

"Call it a brother's intuition." Elliott grinned. You blinked as your vision began to blur. "Hey, you okay?" You let out a slurred response. "Let's get you some air." Elliott helped you out of your chair and outside. You felt the cold air nip at your cheeks, making you feel a thousand times better.

Your head began to spin, the world shifting around you. "I don't feel so well." You groaned. Your body went limp, and the last thing you felt was a pair of strong arms wrapping around you to keep you from falling.

.

. .

. . .

"Guys!" Jack yelled over Sam and Dean, trying to catch their attention. "GUYS!" Jack's eyes flared orange, finally getting Sam and Dean to stop arguing. "Where's Y/n?"

Sam and Dean looked around the room frantically. Jack looked into the bathroom and found nothing. "Damnit!" Dean growled. "How could she have left without us noticing?!"

"Well, you and Sam were rather angry, I think it was very easy for her to slip away." Dean glared at Jack.

"So help me God, if a single hair on her head is out of place, all hell will break loose, and it'll be on you." Sam sighed, shaking his head.

Dean dialed your phone number, looking apprehensive. "Y/n, I swear if you sent me to voicemail on purpose, I am going to kill you! Answer me, damnit!"

"Let me try." Sam mumbled. "Y/n, please call and let us know you're okay. We're worried."

"I can find her." Jack said hopefully. He closed his eyes, searching for any sign of you. He saw you sitting next to a guy in a bar, he saw the man put something in your drink, and he saw you pass out outside of the bar.

Jack grew angry. He knew what happened to you was wrong, he could feel you were in distress. "She's in trouble."

.

. .

. . .

"Wakey wakey, sunshine!" Elliott cheered as he threw water on your face. You gasped, bolting awake. You found that you were bound in a chair, the thick rope cutting into your skin. You looked around to see that you were in some kind of a abandoned building.

You were relieved to see that you still had on all your clothes. "I was worried for a second. I thought I might have given you too high of a dose for your body."

"You roofied me." You groaned.

"I did! But you have to understand, Y/n, I would have never gotten you out of there otherwise. You're one of the strongest sacrifices I've ever had."

"Eros." You said in realization.

"Ding ding ding! We have a winner!" Eros almost seemed happy by the situation. "You are going to be one of the best sacrifices I've had. A hunter with a strong heart full of compassion and pure love. The perfect candidate."

"Please," You whimpered. "Let me go."

Eros sucked in a breath, faking remorse. "You see, I wish I could. . . But I can't. I need you. Ever since the last sacrifice escaped, I've been looking for a new one. And then your brother's, boy wonder and you roll into town. I knew as soon as I saw you that you were perfect. Almost too perfect."

You felt a tear slip down your cheek. "Please. I don't want to die. I'm only 21, there's so much things I haven't done yet. Let me live." You pleaded.

"I was hoping you'd say that." Eros grinned, pulling up a chair in front of you, sitting with his chest on the back of the chair. "I was actually looking for a wife." He gave you a wicked grin that made you squirm in your seat. "I need an heir, or heiress, I don't discriminate. I just want someone to pass my powers off to, to teach. So, I can let you live if you agree to be my wife."

"Rot in hell." You spat, disgusted by the thought of marrying Eros. He grew annoyed, as he punched you, your head snapping back.

"That's too bad." Eros shook his head. "But, at least I'll get to enjoy killing you."

You watched in horror as Eros' fingernails grew into sharp, claw-like hands, almost like a werewolves. You screamed in pain as he drew his finger over your face. "Shh, shh, love. It's gonna be okay." You gave out a small cry, struggling against the ropes.

"The more you struggle, the more it's going to hurt." Eros said in a singsong voice.

You began whispering apologies in your head, to Sam, Dean, Jack, Cas, Rowena, everyone. There were so many unfinished words, so many unsaid 'I love you's,'

"I'm sorry." You whispered. You screamed out once more as Eros dug his nails into your chest.

"Y/N!" You heard Dean yell. Sam, Dean and Jack appeared from behind a crate, your brothers carrying guns, and we'll, Jack himself was a weapon.

"Ah, ah, ah." Eros grinned wickedly. "I am holding her life in the palm of my hand; literally. So put down those shiny guns, and step away from them." Sam and Dean looked at each other. Eros scowled as he dug his nails deeper into your skin. You cried out in pain, feeling his nails getting closer to your heart.

"Alright! Alright!" Sam said hastily, setting down his gun and stepping away, encouraging Dean to do the same.

You were quite the sight for the men. You had blood coating your clothes, a bruised eye from the blows that Eros landed earlier, your hair was a mess and you face was streaked with tears.

"Get away from her!" Jack bellowed.

"Oh, look, it's your lover boy." Jack's words only made Eros angrier, as he retracted his hand, and swiped his claws over your face, creating four long gashes.

"I said get away from her!" Jack's eyes began to glow orange, and he trembled with anger. Eros looked frightened as he was sent flying back into the wall.

Sam and Dean surged forward, both carrying a wooden stake dipped in lambs blood, while Jack went to help you.

"It's okay," He whispered. "I've got you." You gave out a small whimper as he cut the ropes. "Can you stand?" You tried to stand up with the help of Jack, but your knees buckled beneath you. Jack scooped you up in his arms. You buried your head in his chest, turning away from you brothers, who were currently killing Eros.

"Take me home." You mumbled before darkness enveloped you.

.

. .

. . .

When you awoke, you were in your bed at the bunker, surrounded by Cas, Sam, Dean, Jack and Rowena.

"Y/n." Dean breathed a breath of relief as he hugged you. You winced in pain, your body still sore from you attack. "I am so sorry. I never should have said those things to you. I'm so glad you're okay."

"It's okay, Dean." You assured him. Even though you said you were fine, there was still pain swimming in his eyes.

"We couldn't heal your wounds with magic," Rowena informed you. "Since Eros was the one to injure you, it will have to heal naturally. I did make you some herbs that will stop the pain, however."

"Thanks, Rowena." You smiled. The room began emptying out, everyone wanted to let you rest. Jack, however, didn't leave your side.

"I'm sorry, Y/n." He whispered.

"Why are you sorry?" You asked, squeezing his hand.

"I let you get hurt. I should have gotten there sooner." You saw there were tears in his eyes. You frowned as you scooted over.

"Come lie beside me." Jack hesitantly climbed into the bed, pushing aside the covers. You wrapped your arms around his middle and rested your head on his chest. "You got me out of there when you did. I'm okay, and that's all that matters."

"But-"

You cut Jack off with a kiss. "I don't want to talk about it anymore." You mumbled, cupping his cheek. "I just want you to hold me."

"I can do that." Jack nodded, pulling you closer to his body. You decided to put on a movie as you and Jack cuddled. Halfway through the movie, you ended up falling asleep. Jack didn't sleep that often, but he felt so at peace that he fell asleep as well.

When everyone came to check on you again, their hearts melted at the sight of you and Jack. "Oh, just look at them." Rowena whispered to the men. "They're so cute."

"Yeah," Dean nodded. "They are."

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Tag List: @mila-dans @blairrrose

[bybdolan]

ANYTHING THEY WANT TO HEAR [based on cowboy like me by Taylor Swift and this edit] Word Count: 4225 ; Rating: T+ ; TW: slight mention of corruption of minors ; AO3 PLAYLIST

“I'm trying to save my money when it comes to small things like that, you know.” She pushes her sunglasses up. “This thing has an expiration date for me.” “What do you mean?” “I'm getting older, Jack. My beauty and my youth are my currency, and they won't be mine forever.” He looks at her for a very long time. “I don't think you'll ever not be beautiful,” he says after a while, and Isis knows he actually means it. His voice is almost plain when he's being honest, it's so different from his usual act.

read below the cut.

“May I have this dance?”

His voice is dark and low in all the right ways and for a moment Isis is almost lured into his sweet web, but then she remembers how he talked to the old lady with the sapphire ring earlier and she knows that he wants something from her she isn't willing to give him. So instead of answering, she lazily stretches her back like a cat in the sun and takes another sip of her champagne.

“Dancing is a dangerous game,” she replies after a while, and it's almost a bored sigh.

He laughs and exposes a perfect row of white teeth. “Cynical, aren't we?”

“Takes one to know one.”

Her eyes scan the crowd and she catches the eye of a man who is looking at her over the shoulder of the woman Isis assumes is his wife. Isis looks away. This is only her second day here. She has to give the men time to take her in first, let them see her exit the pool in her wet swimsuit and cross her long legs while waiting at the bar; so when they finally get to undress her, it feels like a relief, like unwrapping a gift you have been waiting for. It makes them feel special, to think that they of all people charmed her. Isis knows that men like that.

“You know that he's a married man?”

Isis smiles. “Hasn't stopped me before. It's their choice, not mine.”

She turns back to the man beside her. He's very handsome, all dark skin and dark hair and dark eyes. There's something rugged about him, as if he was a statue somebody had left unfinished, and Isis has the sudden urge to put her hand on his cheek and feel the roughness of his beard against her palm.

He reaches out his hand and Isis takes it. His long slender fingers wrap tightly around hers.

“Jack. Nice to meet you.”

“Isis.”

“Did your parents give you that name?”, he asks, and she laughs and shakes her head.

“No. I did.”

“What's your real name, then?” He lowers his voice and Isis has to smile because she knows what he is trying to do. There's a glimmer of disappointment in his eyes when she doesn't lean in to hear him better.

“It was a church name. A good church name for a good church girl.” She enjoys the sight of Jack's white-teethed grin for a quick second before she turns away.

“I'm sure that's what you are,” Jack says, his voice still low and dark, and it sends shivers down her spine. He's good. If she talks to him for too long, he might get her where he wants her, but Isis isn't willing to give him that satisfaction. So she puts her now empty champagne flute on a tray a waiter carries past, rolls her shoulders in a way she knows makes her shoulder blades look good, and gives him an apologetic smile that he will know is fake.

“Well, Jack, it was nice meeting you, but good girls like me shouldn't talk to young men for too long. It gives them ideas.”

Her high heels are softly clicking on the tennis court floor as she is walking away and she can tell that Jack is looking at the silky skin of her back, exposed by her sequined gown, and for once she actually feels good about it.

The gentle wind that blows across the town square tugs at Isis' napkin and her blouse, but she doesn't mind it because the breeze is making the heavy heat slightly more bearable. Jack is sitting across from her, Aviator sunglasses up in his dark curls, head thrown back as he enjoys the cool air.

“Had I known how awful this heat would be, I would have gone to England,” he groans, and Isis smiles.

“I personally prefer sunshine over constant rain, but that might just be me.”

“Of course you do.” He grins. “It allows you to wear the skimpy bathing suits you love so much.”

Isis rolls her eyes at him over the rim of her sunglasses, but she doesn't actually mean it. “If you don't like me doing that, you have done a very bad job at showing it.”

Jack chuckles and looks up into the blue sky again.

They have been spending some time together these past weeks. It's beneficial to both of them to be seen together occasionally, in situations that suggest they are romantically involved. When Isis goes out with an older man later in the day, his ego is soothed by the impression that somehow, Isis chose him over Jack, and it's the same with the ladies that Jack dines with. Isis is aware of the way they look at her. Most with jealousy, some with desire. Isis feels sorry for the latter.

Of course they sleep together sometimes, secretly, and Jack always sneaks out of Isis' room when they are done, leaving her alone in the big, cold bed. She enjoys the arrangement, it is nice to do something just for her own pleasure, without submitting to others' wishes or expecting monetary gain from it. As much as they publicly exploit their sympathy for one another, their friendship – though Isis wouldn't necessarily call it that – is genuine.

“Do you think that store over there is selling an English newspaper?” Jack asks and Isis follows his eyes to the small shop across the square. She shakes her head.

“I doubt it. But why don't you just wait until we get new ones at the hotel?”

Jack shrugs.

Every week or so, there is a fresh stack of newspapers on the receptionist's desk, and Jack is always the first to buy one. He spends the entire morning standing around somewhere, hair dishevelled, completely engulfed in whatever news he's reading, and Isis knows he actually cares about the articles because there is a spark in his eyes that isn't there when he is reading Albert Camus by the pool.

“Why does it interest you so much?” She cocks her head to the side and drinks her Espresso.

“Because I care about what's going on in the world,” he replies, “I actually wanted to be a journalist when I was younger.”

It surprises Isis. For some reason, she automatically assumed Jack was like her, with no aspirations besides getting the most out of what they were doing.

“Is that why you started doing this?” She makes a vague gesture with her hand. “To get money for college?”

He laughs and shakes his head. “I wouldn't sit here with you if that was the case.”

“Then what was the reason?” She doesn't know why it suddenly interests her so much.

“I didn't want to go to war.” There's a moment of silence. “All my friends got their drafting letters and none of their weird tricks to get out of it worked, so I figured the only way to not get shipped to Vietnam if my number was pulled was bribing the officers. And since I didn't have the money myself, I had to find somebody to pay for me.” He picks up his coffee cup, but instead of drinking he just stares at the dark liquid. “I borrowed a suit and snuck into the fanciest bar in town and somehow managed to get this widow – her name was Rebekah – wrapped around my finger. When my letter came, she gave the officer a thousand bucks to let me off the hook. I couldn't fuck her while being dead in the jungle, after all.”

The silence between them suddenly feels as heavy as the heat. Jack finally drinks his coffee, then his eyes go to Isis.

“What about you?” he asks. She looks away, gaze fixed on the child playing with a stray cat by the fountain in the middle of the square.

“I just wanted pretty dresses,” she says plainly. “My parents were very religious in an almost puritan way, my sisters and I weren't allowed to do anything that was deemed a distraction from our faith. I hated it. I wanted to be like the other girls in school. So whenever I could, I would take the bus into town and look at the dresses in the shop windows or flip through every fashion magazine I saw. And one day this guy came up to me in the streets and told me he'd buy me the dress I was looking at if I did a little favor for him.” Isis looks back at Jack, eyes all cold and icy through her tinted glasses. She puts her chin up, even after all those years. “I wore that dress like an armor. I felt like fucking Joan Of Arc. It was a fuck you to my parents and my church and my teachers and everybody else who thought they could control what I wanted in life.”

The wind blows her hair into her face. It sticks to her cheeks and her lipstick and Isis combs it back into place with her fingers angrily. It's an unusually rough motion for her.

“And then I just went with it, I guess. Always on the lookout for men who were willing to pay for my attention. It's so easy, you just look pretty and tell them anything they want to hear and that's it.”

Jack nods slowly, fingers toying with the white paper napkin tucked under his cup. “That's one of the reasons I didn't go to college with the money I made. I was scared of not being any good.”

Isis looks at him and her features soften. “That's a stupid reason for not trying.”

Jack gives her a crooked grin. “I guess.”

He looks at his hands and then at his wristwatch and makes a face. “Fuck, I've got to get going.”

“Do you have an appointment?”

Her choice of words makes him laugh. “Yes. The blonde lady who always carries those expensive leather handbags, I'm sure you know her.”

Isis nods. “She looked at me this morning when I sat with you during breakfast and I'm surprised I didn't drop dead right then and there.”

Jack laughs again and runs his fingers through his hair. “She's the jealous type. I'm sure she'll be willing to do me a lot of favors if it only means I won't look at you for a few days.”

“You won't manage that.”

“Maybe.”

They both grin.

“If you are planning on ignoring me,” she says, “You should at least pay for my coffee.”

He shrugs. “I guess it would be the nice thing to do. But let it be known that I always pay for your food.”

“I'm trying to save my money when it comes to small things like that, you know.” She pushes her sunglasses up. “This thing has an expiration date for me.”

“What do you mean?”

“I'm getting older, Jack. My beauty and my youth are my currency, and they won't be mine forever.”

He looks at her for a very long time. “I don't think you'll ever not be beautiful,” he says after a while, and Isis knows he actually means it. His voice is almost plain when he's being honest, it's so different from his usual act.

“A lot of people don't think like that.” She looks back at the child near the fountain. The stray cat is gone. She feels a tightness in her throat. “So it would be nice if you could pay for my coffee.” Her voice is a little shaky and she hates it.

Jack silently pulls his wallet from his pocket and puts a bill on the table.

“Thank you,” she says, without looking at him.

He stands up and nods his head as a good-bye.

Isis feels terribly embarrassed and uncomfortably close to him for reasons she can't quite explain, and when she watches him walk to the brown Chrysler he parked in one of the neatly marked spots on the other side of the town square, she has the urge to say something that will make him forget about how unusual this conversation was for them.

“You're really just in this for the fancy cars, aren't you?”

It's a stupid thing to say, now that she knows how untrue it is, but she hopes it's shallow enough to erase what they just shared and make them go back to the sly back-and-forth they've gotten so used to, always vague enough to be fun.

There is relief in his laugh that warmly bounces off the buildings and echoes over the piazza. He throws up his hands in an almost triumphant gesture.

“Damn right I am!"

And that's how Isis knows everything is fine between them. The smile eases its way onto her face without her noticing at first, but when she feels the warmth in her cheeks and in her gut, she bites her lip to make it stop.

Five weeks after his arrival in Italy, Jack gets sick. Isis blames it on a bad oyster, which makes him laugh because she says it in a way that allows no discussion and reminds him of his mother. There are flowers in his hotel room with Get Well Soon!-cards written in fancy ink, but it's Isis who goes to the pharmacy to buy him medicine using her broken Italian, it's Isis who comes to air out his room when he's too tired to leave the bed, and it's Isis who wipes the sweat off his forehead and reassuringly runs her fingers through his greasy hair.

She knows she has better things to do than sitting by his bed and conversing about the topics they only educated themselves about to appeal to the rich folk. The man she has slept with for the past two weeks has flown back to England (not without declaring his love for her in the form of a letter and a diamond necklace), and there are new visitors at the hotel who look at Isis the way she wants them to look at her, and she should be by the pool with her head thrown back and legs curved, or at the bar, touching their shoulders while laughing at the stories they tell. Instead, she is sitting on the cushioned chair in Jack's room with her legs comfortably stretched out, arguing about whether or not Andy Warhol is any good. Sometimes it scares her how much she enjoys his company. She'd rather spend the days with him than alone in her room, she doesn't remember the last time she felt like that about another person.

Her visits get rarer and shorter once Jack gets better and Isis finds a man that takes her to fancy restaurants and buys her flowy dresses in the shops in town, but she makes sure to see Jack at least every other day. One time, as she is about to leave, he tells her to wait and rummages through his bedside table until he pulls out the sapphire ring she had seen on the hand of the lady at the tennis court dance, all those weeks ago.

“For you,” he says, “As a thank you for your time and care.”

When Isis hesitates he cocks his head to the side. "I won't miss it. Blue is more of your color anyway."

Isis lets him slide the ring on her pointer finger and looks at how the blue stone catches the light.

“I'm surprised you actually scored that lady,” she says softly, “I would have bet she wasn't interested in you.”

It's not what she actually wanted to say and they both know it, but they let it slide, and Isis manages to hide how fast her heart is beating until she is alone in the hallway and presses her palm to her chest.

“Do you want me to light that cigarette for you, sweetheart?”

Isis nods and leans over so James can reach the tip of her cigarette with his lighter. She knows that her pose allows him a good look down her dress, and she can tell that he enjoys it.

“Thank you,” she says after her first exhale. The smoke drifts away over the town. The restaurant they are at has a nice view, but maybe she just thinks that because when she looks at the city, she doesn't have to look at James.

It's not that he is ugly – he still has a lot of thick brown hair and some of the bluest eyes Isis has ever seen – but she can't look at him without thinking about his wife, Elizabeth, who had left the hotel last week because she missed their children back home.

Usually, Isis doesn't care about the casualties of her actions, but guilt has slipped into her mind over the course of the past few days. When she told Jack about it, he just shrugged and said he doesn't care, he knows how these people would treat him if he wasn't staying at their hotel but working in his father's garage, and while Isis understands him, her skin is still the same color as theirs and so it’s not her anger to share. Besides, she doesn't feel bad for the men she lies to about her feelings, she feels bad for their wives.

She has never thought much about what it must feel like for them, to be betrayed by the ones they've sworn to dedicate their lives to, be hurt and discarded by the ones they love. Love had been a commodity to Isis, as long as she can remember, and it worries her that the term has started to feel more and more like the vague idea of ‘sacrifice’ she has read about in countless romance novels. It had always seemed so foreign to her, but she kind of understands it now.

“Is there something wrong?” asks James and Isis smiles sweetly and shakes her head. Her mind is trying to replicate how it had felt when Jack kissed her temple last week, when she asked him to stay after they had slept together. Of course he left anyway, but the tenderness of his goodbye kiss made Isis so happy that it frightened her.

“I'm just admiring the view.” She takes another drag of her cigarette and tilts her head in a way that shows off her long, pale neck.

James looks at her and grins. “So am I.”

It takes everything in Isis not to roll her eyes. Instead, she throws her head back with a laugh that bubbles like champagne, covers her mouth with her one hand and puts the other one on James'.

“Oh, stop it, Jac– James!”

The C is a full stop in her throat and she can tell by the look on James' face that he heard it. She intertwines her fingers with his and strokes his thumb to make him forget.

“I’m going back to San Francisco.”

“When?”

“In two days.”

“Why?”

Jack shrugs. “I’m bored of this place. These people. And the heat.”

Isis nods. She knows she would feel the same if it wasn’t for him, but it still feels like he punched her in the gut. She’s not reason enough to stay.

“I just felt like you should know,” he says when Isis doesn’t respond, and she nods again.

“Thank you for telling me.”

There is an uncomfortable silence. Isis doesn’t know what else to tell him, except for the truth: “I’m going to miss you, you know.”

“I’m going to miss you, too.” She can tell that this isn’t all that he wants to say, but he stays silent after finishing his sentence and she wants to grab him by the collar of his stupid yellow shirt and call him a fucking coward. But she doesn’t. Instead, she grabs her book from the table next to her and tells Jack that she has to get ready for dinner.

When he knocks on her door hours later and asks her why she wasn’t at the dining hall, she tells him a lie.

“Come to L.A. with me.” The words fall from her lips carelessly. She had a plan on how to ask him, but then the sunlight made his skin glow even more than usual and suddenly, her words were stronger than her self-control.

“What?” Jack turns around, the look in his eyes somewhere between bewildered surprise and a deep sadness Isis wasn't expecting.

“I'm serious,” she says, voice shaking, “Come to L.A. with me. Or I come to San Francisco with you. I don't care.” She presses her hands into the wall behind her back. “We can live together and sell the other apartment so you can pay for college and finally become a journalist, and I'm sure that I'd find something to do, too, and –”

“Isis,” he interrupts her, and his voice is so gentle that it breaks her heart, “I... Why?”

She shrugs and looks at the shiny tiles on the floor. “I like being around you. And I want you to like me, even though there's nothing in it for me. I've never felt that way about anybody before I met you. And I don't want it to go away.” Her back is pressed against the wall so tightly by now that she feels like the wallpaper is going to swallow her. She doesn't dare to look at Jack.

There is a long moment of silence. Jack looks at his suitcase and sighs. His left thumb is pressed into the palm of his right hand, as if to distract him from pain somewhere else in his body.

“Do you think we can do this?”

It's not a no. Isis feels like she could cry.

“Maybe. I don't know.” Her voice is barely above a whisper.

“But what if we fail?” He turns to her and his eyes are filled with worry. “We both haven't done anything besides this in our lives. Do you really think we can just stop?”

“That's a stupid reason for not trying.” She puts her chin up. “The fear of failure. I've told you that before.”

He exhales and his shoulders drop.

“My god, Jack, look at us. Have we ever failed before?”

“This is different.”

“But it's still us.” Her hands are numb by now from being trapped between her back and the wall, but she doesn't care. She feels the same way she felt as a young girl, standing in front of the storefront windows, so determined to get what she wanted.

Jack looks very lost in the middle of his room. It's the first time Isis notices how big it is. “I'm just scared of hurting you,” he says softly.

“The fact that you care is enough for me.”

There's a short moment where neither of them move, as if they were frozen in time. Jack looks past Isis through the window, out into the sky, then back at her. She holds his gaze. She wants this. She wants him. So much that it’s clawing at her from the inside. He should know that.

Finally, slowly, he closes the space between them, wraps his arms around her waist and puts his head on her shoulder. He pulls her away from the wall and Isis feels the blood rush back into her hands. She buries her fingers in his hair. Jack softly rocks her from side to side as if she was a child.

“You know, I've always wanted to go to L.A.,” he murmurs into her neck and his words are echoing in her bones, “The palm trees look very pretty.”

“They are,” she whispers, “They are.”

“I’ve forgotten how uncomfortable these seats are.”

Jack chuckles beside her. “You've been in Italy for too long.”

Isis sighs. “Yes.”

She feels her body vibrate as the plane starts to drive. It will take them to Rome, from there, they will go to Los Angeles. Her stomach starts to twitch, like it always does during takeoff, but there is more to her anxiety today. The rattling of the tires on the concrete and the roaring of the engines drown out her thoughts. She closes her eyes.

“Are you okay?” Jack's voice is as soft as ever and yet she understands him just fine.

“I'm nervous,” she replies.

“Is it because of the plane?”

Isis opens her eyes and smiles at him. It's an unsure smile, flickering somewhere between excitement and fear. She can tell from the look in his eyes that he understands what she is trying to tell him.

He reaches for her hand and starts drawing small circles on her skin with his thumb. The plane lifts off and suddenly everything feels very still and quiet, despite the engines’ constant roar.

Jack's thumb rests on the sapphire ring on her pointer finger.

“I can't believe you're actually wearing it,” he murmurs, “Considering how it came into my possession.”

Isis puts her head on his shoulder. “It was the first gift you ever gave me. It's mine now. It doesn't matter how you got it.”

Jack laces their fingers together and kisses her forehead. Then he turns his head back to the window and they both watch as the plane breaks through the clouds, into the bright sky.