#Bro is about to drop dead he did NOT expect this /silly

[cartoonsatfazbenders]

You wouldn’t happen to have a favourite flower, would you? ~ 💜

I- um- I really like peonies??

[whyse7vn]

KIM NAMJOON

RANDOM 01:

!gc namjoon who has never experienced peace since joining the group

!gc namjoon who feels like being in the group has aged him 50 years

!gc namjoon who despite this would rather drop dead than have not met all of you

!gc namjoon who knows every single member like that back of his hand

!gc namjoon who often worries his members find him boring

!gc namjoon who forced everyone to download life 360 while on tour because you all wouldn’t stop getting lost and it was stressing him out

!gc namjoon who has a fun fact about everything like fr everything its kinda crazy

!gc namjoon who still to this day checks the life 360 app (that thank god none of you have deleted) every morning afternoon and night to make sure everyone is safe

!gc namjoon who has now reconsidered his position on having kids if parenthood is anything like looking after his members you can count him out actually!

!gc namjoon who on one random night in 2017 went to an equally random art gallery on his own “impulsively” and definitely NOT because you briefly mentioned you needed “artsy guy” in your life

!gc namjoon who after the “impulsive” art gallery trip which he actually did enjoy way more than he expected to seemed to have a complete personality shift finding interest and beauty in the smaller and simpler things in life

!gc namjoon who won’t admit this out loud but one of the reasons he hasn’t learnt how to drive yet is because he enjoys the fact that you drive him everywhere, you’ve even given him the silly little nickname of “number one passenger princess” that makes him feel all giddy inside

!gc namjoon who always puts his members first

!gc namjoon who wouldn’t of minded having you as his roommate but when 21 year old jungkook came to him all puppy eyed and nervous asking namjoon if you would like the idea of living with him all joon could do was smile “that’s a great idea kook! i’m sure she’d love it”

!gc namjoon the most patient man you know

!gc namjoon who buys you flowers for every single major holiday without a fail

!gc namjoon who once set you and jungkook’s kitchen on fire

!gc namjoon who has almost asked you to be his girlfriend a total of 5 times so far

!gc namjoon a true gentleman and romantic at heart

!gc namjoon who gets so upset when you refer to him as RM whether it’s a joke or work related it’s joon to you always and forever

!gc namjoon who for every piece of artwork in his home from paintings to poem books can relate said artwork to one of his members, he finds comfort in collecting pieces that remind him of his favourite people

!gc namjoon who genuinely freaks out if the group chat isn’t active at least once everyday

!gc namjoon who went through a really intense gym phase and would genuinely force all his members to wake up at 6 am and go on runs with him. however the whole group run thing only ended up lasting around 3 days turns out yoongi is really not a morning person and jimin surprisingly was (at the time) and that does not mix well !! long story short yoongi punched the shit out of jimin while tae recorded, you and jin laughed, hoseok was on the brink of passing out, jungkook was crying… for some reason? and namjoon was stressed safe to say group runs or work outs never happened again after that and namjoons intense gym bro lifestyle slowly mellowed itself out

!gc namjoon the groups designated decision maker no matter how small all large the issue what joon decides is right and final an unspoken agreement between the members

!gc namjoon who often wonders how you all put so much trust in his words and decisions honestly it scares him a little a LOT

!gc namjoon who hates boba

!gc namjoon who allows you to meal prep for him, he thanks the lord you do this for him actually saving him from having to cook for himself most days

!gc namjoon who is really good a board games

!gc namjoon who talks in his sleep

!gc namjoon who is quite a traditional man

!gc namjoon who doesn’t believe in hookup culture, flings and friend’s with benefits

!gc namjoon who prefers cute dates, long walks and sharing interests

yet !gc namjoon who lets you lead him into an empty room away from the obnoxiously loud party thrown for jungkooks 24th(?) birthday

!gc namjoon who from then on lets you steal kisses from him

moments with him

!gc namjoon who doesn’t believe in “casual”

!gc namjoon who can’t do “casual”

!gc namjoon who is aware of his feelings and of everyone’s feelings

!gc namjoon who knows his members like the back of his hand

he knows their realising their own feelings

each others too

he knows jaehyun was a wake up call not just to him but to everyone

!gc namjoon who knows he’s running out of time

!gc namjoon who wishes he was selfish

wishes he was an asshole

a self serving piece of shit

who wishes he could just shout from the rooftops how utterly obsessed and fuck he’ll admit it at this point in love with you he is

he wishes that he could love you without hurting others

!gc namjoon who has become a casual in your life

a casual kiss

a casual fuck

a casual dinner

casual moments

!gc namjoon who has become accustomed to being your romantic casual because despite initially not believing in the concept namjoon is more than willing to throw away all his morals and beliefs if it means he gets to have you hold him for a night, kiss him for a night, be with him for a night

namjoon is willing to do pretty much anything and everything to be a part of your life, a temporary go to, name it and he’ll fill that role no questions asked

kim namjoon is willing to be

your casual.

—

tags: @piw6n @92jinnies @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizza1 @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @jazminethecreator @k4ngelz @jmnscutie @sopebubbles-replies @cynicalyoongs @lightningpussy54 @eunthv @gigiiiiislife @lowkeykin @elissasimp

[cressthebest]

Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 46

chapter 70:

1. “And now the furniture is covered in dust, the books haven't been touched, the flowers are dead, the food has spoiled, and all the little pieces of himself from before feel foreign to him, like they're from a complete stranger.”

why did i blindly hope that crimson rivers couldn’t get more sad??

2. “Regulus couldn't have imagined it, then. Barty dying. Being dead. He was safe, aged out from reapings, and he would have made it if the war hadn't taken him.”

i want to gnaw on something. this is driving me crazy. i need to go eat dirt oh my god

3. every time i briefly forget about evan in this fic, his name is name dropped like a fucking bomb from the sky and i literally want to break a window

4. “And then there's Sirius, who barely knows what to do with his own pain, struggling to balance it, like he's not allowed to have it, feeling like an imposter for simply daring to grieve a man who wasn't his father as a father, as if that man didn't love him as a son.” the monty and sirius bond are still making me cry, actually

5. “I know I will be dead long before you read this,”

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

once again, had to voice memo my freind

6. welcome back to another round of lily vs the fridge

7. mary: you love dorcas

lily: NOOO!!! only you babes 😘

mary: fucking dumbass

8. idk how to explain it, but i’m glad that mary and lily (and dorcas and marlene) had such complex relationships. they weren’t just the badass lesbians who had it all together and had a perfect relationship that scoffed at the silly boys. they love just as hard and fumble just as hard. their relationships are far from perfect and are very messy. i love it

9. “His dad watched these flowers bloom.

His dad never saw them die.”

*eye twitch*

10. maybe i shouldn’t blame dorcas, but i’m kinda pissed at her for not showing up to marlene’s funeral

11. “Barty got a funeral, too. Regulus planned that one, and you could tell, because it was done so delicately.”

screaming crying throwing up

what if i never spoke again? as like some sort of stupid protest? as like a statement to show how upset i am over bartys death? huh?? what would you do then bizzarestars????? huh?????????

12. “Vanity got honored as a war hero in the Hallow, a statue raised in her honor on the castle grounds, replacing Riddle's legacy.” i’m actually losing my mind. i want to shovel grass in my mouth and chew stained glass. idk or drink a latte or something

13. bro i’m so mad that sirius was 100% right about how james wouldn’t grieve around him, always wanting to take care of sirius, which is why he has to leave. i’m so mad. i’m so mad. this is gonna hurt

14. “”Fucking hell, James, we're still in love, so calm down. It's—it's not an actual breakup, you know."” -sirius

😭😭😭 they’re such soulmates omg

15. oh god it hurt more than i thought. james thought sirius was about to break the news about remus leaving. not sirius leaving. james never once considered that sirius would leave

16. SNSKDNJSNSMSKSM THEYRE KISSING YAY OMG JEGULUS KISSS OMGGG AFTER LITERALLY TWO MONTHS THEYRE KISSING AGAIN

chapter 71:

1. “[Regulus] is such a sweet boy, and yes, yes, [Effie] has seen him murder, but that matters very little to her, overall�� me talking about my favorite characters 🥰

2. wolfstar

currently wanting to gnaw through concrete and plywood over them

3. “Remus also calls Lily every day. They're more discreet about it, not practically confessing their love and trying to make out through the screen the way James and Sirius do”

remus: this is my boyfreind sirius, and that’s my boyfreind’s boyfreind, james ♥️

4. remus thinking of sirius as a helicopter parent towards regulus has me in fucking tears omg that’s so funny

5. “That's the first time they have sex after the war, when Remus tells Sirius how he made Riddle pay for all that he'd done.”

idk, but that’s not the sentence i was expecting

6. 😭😭😭 remus realizing that lyall never liked any of his ex boyfreinds, and the fact that he approves of sirius, the murderer, is laughable

7. jealous sirius kissing remus within an inch of his life 😭😭😭

8. “It's no secret that Sirius likes the hickies, but it's not just him; the truth is, the only thing Remus likes more than getting to put them there is getting to see them there.”

uhhh um uhhhhh hot

9. 👀 they getting nasty

10. james being a teacher >>>>>>>>>>>

11. what are sirius and regulus gonna get up to?

12. it’s heartbreaking that lily and mary have to raise bingley. on one hand, it’s domestic and it’s their little family. on the other hand, they never should have had to do this. lily cooks and tucks him into bed and raises him. but she’s not his mom. and mary raises bingley. but she’s not his mom. and it’s so scary to navigate this

13. THE BAGELS

14. james’ knife kink >>>>>>>>>

15. omg i’m a blubbering mess. they have a home together!!!

16. hello!???? they’re dancing together????? in their home?????? what if i burst into tears?????

17. AWWWWW JAMES PROPOSED AGAIN

18. please please please please tell me we get a marriage chapter

[thorne-antics]

THE DRAGON PRINCE SEASON 5 SPOILERS

So... my thoughts on season 5!!

Episode 1: Domina Profundis

- so I'm assuming Callum and Rayla talked after the events of Escape From Umber Tor because I expected them to be still a little awkward but they're not, it looks like they're friends again and that makes me so happy!!

- why does Rayla need to take off the nails on the painting in front of the secret passageway? Can't Stella just make a portal to the other side of it?

- okay I hate Karim but did the sunfire elf guard really have to take his ring? I think Janai would've let him keep it. And the guard was like "it belongs to Queen Janai now" and then proceeded to drop it on the ground. Wtf bro

- Opeli telling Callum why Rayla was arrested and Callum being like "okay, so what?" will never not be funny to me

- Callum really said "it's okay she just got too silly"

Episode 2: Old Wounds

- their little conversation about trust... they're healing their relationship YIPPEE

- domina profundis looks so fucking cool I wish we saw more of her

- I now expect to see Barius invent a new pastry every season from here on out.

- CALLUM DOING PUPPY DOG EYES AT RAYLA GAVE ME SO MUCH SEROTONIN

- watching Soren, Ezran and Corvus laughing about shit jokes did give me slight secondhand embarrassment but surprisingly it was kind of funny. Definitely an upgrade from the god-awful fart jokes in season 4

- THIS IS ONLY EPISODE 2 AND ALREADY THEY'RE GOING HAM WITH THE RAYLLUM CONTENT. THEY SPENT THE NIGHT AT A COZY INN TOGETHER. AND THE BANTER BETWEEN THEM AFTERWARDS IS SO CUTE. ugh yes s5ep2 "Old Wounds" my beloved (Actually I love the whole first 4 episodes but we'll get to that later)

- "I know dark magic created this place, but it's a bridge between our two worlds, and now here we are, crossing it together" I'm screaming.

- the banther chase was so cool! I love the battle duo dynamic Rayla and Callum have going on, and the way the banther was animated looked awesome. (Also I find it hilarious how when Rayla's arrow hit the Banther, it literally got right back up but it was like "actually, fuck this" and just dipped)

- Viren's dream sequence with baby Soren ripped my heart out

Episode 3: Nightmares And Revelations

- Ezran literally befriended the entire dragon population except Sol Regem, Rex Igneous, and the archdragon of stars (if there is one) (no moon archdragon I'm pretty sure? Because the last one was Luna Tenebris and she died) and I love that for him

- Callum's reaction to finding out Amaya and Janai are engaged was priceless. I was so excitedly waiting to see that and it was everything I'd hoped for.

- THIS WHOLE CONVERSATION

They really said "Wanna do something foolish?" "Do you even have to ask?"

Episode 4: The Great Bookery

- Kazi you nerd I love you

- Amaya being the best aunt!!

- UGH THE RAYLLUM MONTAGE

- MMM YES CALLUM AND KAZI THE BOOKWORM DUO

- "I would do anything for you" oh. my. god.

- THIS WAS SO FUNNY

- BANTHER FIGHT BANTHER FIGHT BANTHER FIGHT

"Rayla, I was wrong. I waited too long. I hope you know--" "I know." UHM, I DON'T? WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT? (I'm guessing this is them saying "I love you" without saying it but I NEED TO KNOW FOR CERTAIN)

- The only reason Amaya and Corvus survived is because they hid in the book drop and Amaya thought to do that because Kazi pointed it out earlier so basically Kazi saved their lives. Good job Kazi.

- question: how the fuck did a fall from that height NOT kill Corvus? I'm glad he's not dead but HOW?

Episode 5: Archmage Akiyu

- "Oh no... You're making me the deciding vote, aren't you" Imao 😭

- Terry is such a good boyfriend.

- everyone's faces when the giant birds swoop down at them

I AM CACKLING

- Callum fistbumping Rayla... I will cherish this forever.

- Rayla asking Callum to push her into the water because she doesn't have the courage to jump in herself, Callum holding her hand as they dive in together instead... oh I'm sick. He's so patient and sweet and gentle with her I'm gonna cry

- the sheer amount of rayllum hand touches we're getting this season is incredibly satisfying

- Tidebound Tina/Archmage Akiyu is so silly. I like her a normal amount

- IT'S KIM'DAEL!!

Episode 6: Bait And Switch

- let Soren have the best lavender essential oils in all of Scumport he deserves it

- when Ezran goes to see Finnegrin and Callum stays outside and he says "it's fine I'll just get to know my new friend here" and Elmer says they aren't friends, Callum lets out this little giggle and it's the cutest thing. FOR WHAT? LITERALLY FOR WHAT

- I'm conflicted about Claudia fighting the dragon. I mean, slay, but also... I'm scared 😃

- BABY GLOW TOADS!!

Episode 7: Sea Legs

- I need to know what Bait said when he grunted and Ezran said "that's not very nice, Bait"

- "baby mage" Nyx I'm gonna have to stop you right there because I will not tolerate this falsehood and this slander towards my boy Callum

- I love how when the baby glow toad fell overboard, Nyx was like "I'll get it" and Callum was like "no I'll get it" and then there's Soren, who hollers "SORENBALL!" and just yeets himself in.

- Callum carrying the episode with his sky magic ugh yes (partially Soren too, for saving the baby glow toad, and Villads bc of course he's a great captain and the squad couldn't do this without him, but Callum is slaying I'm so proud of him)

- Amaya finding out Kim'Dael took Janai may have broken my heart just a little

Episode 8: Finnegrin's Wake

- IT'S CALLUM IN THE INTRO INSTEAD OF VIREN OH FUCK

- please excuse my excessive use of "fuck"

- they hurt my boy ☹️

- "I'm not gonna help you murder the archdragon of the ocean" "Murder? When you put it like that you make me sound like a bloodthirsty fiend" YOU LITERALLY ARE 💀

- Rayla screaming at Finnegrin to let Callum go when she sees that Callum got beat up... the pre-s5 speculation fanfic writers are probably losing their shit rn

- THIS IS MY FAVORITE SCENE IN THE WHOLE FUCKING SHOW. OH MY GOD.

I have never seen anyone more angry at any point in the entirety of this show than Callum is in this scene. He's been angry before, but rarely, and when he does, he remains level-headed. But then Finnegrin starts torturing Rayla, and that's what sets him off. And seeing a character like him, who's always been so sweet and gentle and kind, going absolutely fucking feral because someone hurt his loved one, is so satisfying to me. He loves her so much, the worst thing to him is seeing her suffering. I'm going insane over this.

- HE FUCKING UNLOCKED THE OCEAN ARCANUM. I'M SO PROUD OF HIM

- remember when he told Rayla "I'd do anything for you"? Yeah... (I'm totally writing a fanfic about this)

- if you couldn't tell, I fucking love Callum (this is probably the hundredth time I've said this)

Episode 9: Infantis Sanguine

- Callum looks so pretty here. He always looks pretty but MY GOD

- I'm gonna cry. The way he looks at Rayla like "Hey it's okay I'm right here with you :)" has me in a chokehold

- Rayla getting scared about being underwater and swimming back up to the surface and Callum immediately going after her to see if she was okay... no one fucking touch me

- I had no problem with Claudia at the start of the underwater fight but then she threatened Ezran and I was like "sweetie I can't defend you anymore"

- bruh they couldn't talk underwater anyway so what the fuck was the point of threatening Ezran to make him talk?

- I know it's a fantasy cartoon and the logic doesn't matter but RAYLA SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ABLE TO SHOOT THOSE ARROWS SO PERFECTLY WHILE UNDERWATER.

- Aaravos has been in ONE EPISODE this season and nearly every speaking line he has is so sus

- I always hated Viren because him manipulating and gaslighting his kids reminded me of my dad who I haven't spoken to for 3 years now, and I've had to accept that he's never going to change, but I'm glad Viren has changed and I'm proud of him

- so... Viren dead? Viren not dead? Fuck if I know! Find out in 8 months!

okay, my final ranking of all the seasons so far: this one comes out on top, then below it is season 3, then season 2, and at the bottom, season 1 and 4 are tied. And I'm so excited for season 6. Thank you and goodnight.

[chipthekeeper]

one last Acolyte commentary drop, just for me because i'm sure no one else cares:

- One last Acolyte night, maybe for the season, maybe forever. Will we find out? I doubt it

- I truly don't know what to expect from this. Keeping my hopes low. Haven't been too excited about it all day, so probably won't be let down if I think it's missing things.

- We don't get an episode title?

- They can't fuck with Vernestra. I'm gonna disown this whole thing if that happens

- (Qimir/Osha stuff in the previously on section) [exhausted sigh] Forgot I have to deal with this shit again

- I was about to get all excited and say, oh god the next time I get to do this it's gonna be Andor, but that'ssss not true. It's gonna be a show that we know fucking nothing about

- Dry your hair, freak

- (Mae freaks out in the helmet and Qimir gets possessed? by someone???) What the fuck?.....What the ffffffuck is happening?....Is sh…she possess him?? I'm so fucking confused already….What the hell? [incredulous chuckling] 

- [whispers] What is fucking happening? What? What?

- “The future isn’t fixed” Okay Yoda ((heh, foreshadowing))

- (Sol’s just sitting on the floor) Don’t you have a chair?

- “See you in hell, Jedi” [cackles] What a line. Welcome back, Han

- [lots of delighted giggling as the chase through the ring starts] Dude!!!....It’s not the Eye but it’s pretty sick…..Targeting computer!!

- [perfect Maverick impression] hit the breaks, he’ll flight right by…….okay maybe not right now

- (Bazil yelling) Too bad Yord’s not here to…tell us what the fuck that was

- Awwww she's going to be nice even to evil Pip. Why did you have to make him evil if you're going to be nice to him?

- [perfect Obi-Wan impression] Another happy landing…….And I don't mean that ironically. How are they so–

- (Mog appears) His face is…..difficult. I have to go yell at a cat

- Who’s this guy? Oh that's that guy

- “I think the Jedi are a massive system of unchecked power, posing as a religion. A delusional cult that claims to control the uncontrollable” Well you had me in the first half

- Alright, Mr. Shady Guy Senator. That's never gone wrong before

- (Osha and Qimir shit) [another exhausted sigh] I'm just not interested in this…..Hey you put your dumbass cape on backwards again

- Already a third of the way through and nothing has—WHO THE FUCK IS THAT!!??!?! OH my GOD…Holy shit. So that was..Plagueis. Right..? Oh, my g—as I’m saying nothing has happened [laughs] Alright Leslye, you got me

- (Vernestra trying to talk to someone but not Sol like I thought) What the–what? What? Who is she trying to talk to? [whispers] What the fuck….?

- Bro, I'm…….so scared

- [theorizing mumbles] So Qimir is being puppeted by Plagueis….who learned…how to do that from….Koril..possibly? And Aniseya?......doubtful but again I’m…so fucking confused....

- “Or we could climb” I was going to say, you can fucking climb up the side obviously we've seen

- (Qimir straight up disappears) The fuck? Is he even real? Everybody's thirsting over this guy and he's just like a dead puppet probably. That’d be really funny to me. He's like actually a silly little guy called Qimir but…gets puppeted…by this ugly motherfucker

- (Mae climbs out of the pit) And we've come full circle!

- (Qimir talks to Sol through his helmet) I’ve got PTSD from that voice now

- Don’t have your gauntlets on this time, you can only use your head. You have to risk getting your neck chopped off

- Ooooh! Oh, bitchin’.....Wire work hello. That was cool

- A lightsaber battle in broad daylight where they can't use a weird—very nice. Woah! Aw, why didn’t he chop his leg off?

- (Sol does that move to deflect the lightsabers) Ohohoho okay!!! Okay!!! Let's gooooo!!!!

- [creaky door groaning]

- Fuck fuck fuck…..Noooooo, evil Pip!!!

- (sister fight) This is some impressive shit

- So glad they’re not in the fucking Volume

- Well, look who's here. So Vernestra was in hyperspace again and we didn't get to see it AGAIN??

- Wait, is it Vernestra? Or is it someone worse? Zombie Yord. I hope it's Zombie Yord–no, he would come in a Vector. Zombie vector

- Short his own lightsaber on his own helmet!!!

- Gotcha, bitch

- Stab him in the faaaace!! For Yord!! For Jecki!!! Do it. I know I was mad at you for killing somebody last time, but you should really do it this time…..(he doesn't) of course

- No, Mae…Why? Wait ooh let her kill him. Ooh yeah, there we go

- “I want him to face…the Republic” That's not gonna happen

- (Osha starts choking Sol) Jesus. Okay….Dude. Okay [nervous chuckling] Hot damn….yeah this is way more painful than if she’d used the lightsaber

- (kyber crystal starts bleeding in the saber) Oh!!! Bleeding in real time and she's not even holding it in her hand!!!! Hot shit, oh my god. That’s fucking awesome

- Wow. Spend one day with a naked guy and this is what happens

- [there’s simply no way to describe the noises I made when the lightsaber turned red] YOOOOOHOHOHO. That’s. FUcking. Sick. Oh my GOD. The music!!!!

- All these Jedi gonna die too? Fucking shit

- What is that guy? Hellooo what species are you?

- Oh the hood up [scared groaning]

- I'm so nervous. We’ve got so many red shirts….and Mog

- Use the tracker? What?

- Use that light whip to fuckin’ take his head off. I'm ready. Let's go

- So cute they're back together, I hope nothing happens!!

- Oh that tracker. He has a name!!!!!

- Alright now what? Now we're just at a tree

- You two kill that guy and then go run off together. It doesn’t–nothing else matters, just get rid of this motherfucker [angry grunting] fuckin’ hell

- BAD IDEA!!!! Ew

- I don't like this….better be getting season two or I swear to fuck

- Tell me Pip was recording everything

- “They say I killed someone?” Killed a few someones……..well just two I guess

- Well we had one funeral at least……..This hurts man….

- “A pupil of mine, before he turned to evil” Ah eh oh! [Leo pointing meme] That was a very Obi-Wan line. God dammit. Don't Obi-Wan Vernestra!!! God that pisses me off [sad chuckle]

- Season two tease or we riot. Like you can't just say hello Plagueis is here and then—(shippy stuff happens) Ew, stop that! Stab him!!!!

- Gonna have to sit through years of this shit now. Ew.

- Here's Yoda! Yep [laughs] Cute. So what is she going to tell him? Everything and he's going to cover it up even more. Yeah. Wow

- Alright. That was good and fun, but I'm upset and have questions still so….Pretty much what I expected

- That was a lot of fun though, and that's mostly what I care about for this. Lots of fun. Looked cool. Had me yellin’. I'll take it

[toytulini]

I saw Barbie last night, I dont think i have a long film review of it for yall but idk I'll put some thoughts under a readmore I guess?

-Right off the bat, I enjoyed it, it was fun. It was a fun pink poppy romp. Thats about what I expected of it, and thats pretty much what I got

-Its not particularly radical in its gender/feminism takes, its very basic, which, I saw a number of ppl mention that before I saw it so I wasnt expecting anything radical. It couldve done better. it was. fine. im shrug about it i guess.

-My mom enjoyed it and was apparently not expecting any sort of emotional depth or story at all so it caught her off guard. I heard her crying. she cries easy at movies. I'm glad my mom liked it. Maybe she'll absorb some of the very basic feminism it drops idk.

-I knew the Kens adopted patriarchy and introduced it to Barbieland but it felt lile that happened very fast, idk.

-The ending....I. is her going to a gynecologist supposed to be like. shes gotten a vagina by deciding to be human?? or is she trying to schedule a surgery or something? that felt pretty weird to me if im honest, i thought it was gonna be a job interview or smth... Especially with how everyone was like "Barbie is ace (heheeh i agree) cos she has no genitals! (sorry what. excuse me. wanna run that by me again?)" like okay that makes that headcanon reasoning even more dewply uncomfortable that it already was?

-I enjoyed weird Barbie. i wish theyd cast someone else cos iirc ka/te mckin/non was a transmisogynist? unless she apologized or said she changed her mind on the topic since like 2017?? but i havent seen anything? idk. just. annoying to keep platforming these ppl. i guess theres probably other actors involved that have shit views of trans ppl. whatever i guess.

-I did dress up a little. i feel like my outfit had Weird Barbie Vibes. maybe ill post a pic.

-I did enjoy it and it had a number of shots and or transitions i liked, i think the one with the disco ball to the moon or whatever was enjoyable.

-god we really are so weird about barbie

-it just feels factually incorrect that all dolls pre barbie were baby dolls? idk. im sure it was the most common kind. but idk. not to be weird about The History Of Dolls but like. the porcelain dolls from the Victorian era. idk if those count as baby dolls. iirc those were to help young girls practice prepping dead bodies of loved ones for funerals or smth??? but i guess porcelain dolls have a sort of babyish look about them. and are fragile so you cant play rough with them.

-Like i Know its a 2hr long toy commercial for mattel but also god that cant be right. even if they werent filling the same niche as barbie as idk basically a fashion doll? there had to be other dolls right?

-I know the flat foot thing is Supposed to be over the top and silly for them all to get upset about but also tbh. as a bitch with falling arches the way some of yall make jokes about flat feet still is uh. well. rude. but also lmao man. the day my arches started hurting for no reason while i was barefoot did sorta feel emotionally like her feet falling to the ground lol.

-i want to introduce barbie to margot robbie's harley quinn owo. i think that would be Fun :3

-i want Ken's job. how do i do Beach as an occupation.

-I actually liked how they handled Ken and Barbie's rship til the end. i feel weird about that ending overall and also it feels weak wrt her dynamic as Ken. they make him grapple w her not reciprocating his feelings the same way but then she just leaves barbieland anyway?? and ig they dont get to explore a friendship or qpr dynamic. ok. its fine i guess.

-her saying she has no genitalia felt so transgender in a way im not sure it was intended to. ken saying he has all of the genitalia felt even more transgender. headcanoning them both as extremely transgender in fun weird new ways and no one can stop me.

-Allan is my favorite character i think. bro me too

-bibbleless movie. add bibble.

[thebeautyoffanfics]

Idk if you already made this but Hanako, Kou and mitsuba jealous Hcs with their girlfriend that is quite popular among the students pls? thank u!!

hanako x f!reader, kou minamoto x f!reader, mitsuba sousuke x f!reader

a/n: sure thing!! No worries, I haven’t made it yet :D you’re so very welcome, and thank you so much for requesting!! I love jealousy headcanons tho I don’t think I’ve ever written them? I hope these turn out alright, and I’m so sorry for the time this took!

warnings: jealousy?

word count: 1,936

Hanako <3

Oh boy- can I do anything but wish you luck?

Hanako is already a fairly clingy and jealous guy, that’s practically canon. He’ll stand between you when you’re talking to anyone, and I mean aaaaanyone. He just can’t risk losing you!

(It’s got a whole lot to do with his insecurities, of course- while he wouldn’t admit it, not wanting to drop his “ah? I’m just an innocent little boy, free of issues and perverted thoughts <3” attitude, he does struggle a lot. He’s a ghost, a murderer, and imperfect in more ways than those. You’re popular for a reason. You’re so pretty, so kind, so lovable- you’re alive, and probably have morals. What are you doing with a dead murderer?)

Wow, ANYWAY- we’re here for jealousy, not Hanako’s issues, though they will probably resurface shortly.

Seeing everyone around you… always wanting your attention, always complimenting you…

You deserved it! He thought all of those positive things and more-! But… at this point, so many people admiring you, why were you still with him?

Even if you explain to him constantly that you love him dearly, and wouldn’t leave him for anyone else, he still gets somewhat possessive. Eventually putting the “but why does (Y/N) still love me,,” aside, he just wants others to keep their hands off you :((

It’s no fault of yours, and he acknowledges that! But it’s the fault of others getting so close to you >:((

Though they can’t see him, when people go up to you, talking joyfully- he’s standing there, arms wrapped around you, head on your shoulder as he glares daggers into their souls.

BRO IF SOMEONE FLIRTS WITH YOU OR TOUCHES YOU??

You’ve never seen him super angry, much less murderous. He doesn’t want you to see him that angry normally- but holy moley is he about ready to beat someone.

Yet, he’s still just a ghost- plus if he did something Teru would exorcise him, booooo. So, he settles for continuing to glare, standing between the two of you, hitting their arm if it’s resting on your shoulder. Once again, they’re completely unaware of it, but you aren’t!

“Hanako, you know I won’t leave you for them. They’re a classmate, I barely know them, really.”

“But they want to know you. And I don’t want them to know you… they’re gonna try and take you from me, (Y/N)!”

“I won’t let them take me, you big dummy. So, if you could please let go of me so I can get back to class?”

“No :((“

Not only does he cling to you, of course- though he hugs you bunches and squishes your face just because you’re cute- you can also expect a lot of kisses. Ranging from quick “hey, I’m here, and please don’t choose someone else over me”, “hey, my kisses are better than theirs!! Here’s proof!”, “you’re my girlfriend, not theirs, and if they keep treating you like you aren’t taking I’m going to stabby stabby (but I can’t stab cos Teru’s here, but I would if it wasn’t upsetting)”, etc, etc. It’s… almost strange how easy it is to understand what he means from the way he kisses you- but, I digress!

Overall, he gets jealous fairly easily, and gets very clingy when jealous. He’s not amazing with words, so he wants to show you that he loves you with actions!! However, those actions, more often than not, end up just being… clinging to you, and glaring at people who try to get too close to you.

(RIP Akane, Kou, and Nene for bearing witness to you walking around the school with a visibly angry Hanako. Though the worst the others get is the feeling that someone is staring at them, they get to witness his jealousy from off to the side.)

Kou Minamoto <3

He’s nearly completely opposite from Hanako, actually! He doesn’t get jealous very often, trusting you to actually tell him if something were wrong in the relationship. And, when he does get jealous, he does his best to not show it.

He’s not fond of being jealous. It makes him feel like he’s betraying you…? Like him being jealous is the same as him saying that he doesn’t trust you. But, similarly to Hanako, he trusts you. He just doesn’t trust others quite as much. Not with his very cute and very pretty and very sweet girlfriend :((

While it takes a lot to get him jealous, two things that really can make his temper cut short are (similarly to Hanako) when someone outright flirts or touches you. Especially if they touch you and the two of you aren’t at least friends-

If someone flirts, he’s going to casually slip into the conversation, if he wasn’t there already. A quick “hey, (Y/N)! Wait, sorry, I didn’t realize you were talking-“, then he’ll stand next to you, grabbing your hand lightly. One thing about Kou is, he does his best to be gentle all the time! Even when he’s jealous, he’d never ever hurt you intentionally-!!

If someone’s touching you, he’ll hop into the conversation as he does when someone flirts, adding a “I need your help with something, when you can.” This time, or any time really, if you’re uncomfortable you can use it as an excuse to get away!! Kou’s got your back!!!

If it’s been a day where people just constantly seem to be needing your attention, he’ll start to let his jealousy get to him a bit. It’s not even that some people like your attention- heck, he gets it! He likes having your attention as well. It’s more that… they constantly need your attention. Someone always needing something, even when he just wanted to have a conversation with you :((

In that case, he’ll be slightly clingy, and slightly pouty. Almost like a young child. His lips will be pouted slightly, eyes looking a bit lower to the ground than usual. His hand will be secured in yours, and your shoulder will be lightly pressed against his.

“Kouuu, tell me what’s wrong~,” You spoke, poking his cheek with your index finger. When he was like this, it was easy to tell he was embarrassed about whatever he was pouting over, and not upset over something too serious. It was the perfect time to mess with him.

His face would flush as it usually did- and he’d look away, pouting a bit harder as his eyebrows furrowed slightly. “It’s nothing, (Y/N), really.”

“You’re pouting. Come on, now, you really can tell me. I promise I won’t think of you any less!”

“…it’s just… well- well, seeing all those people around you all day, and I couldn’t really… even get to talk to you. You even had to leave early during lunch-! I’m not angry or anything- it’s dumb, it’s dumb, really-“

“Awwwwh, Kou! Don’t be jealous, sweetheart! It’s not dumb, I actually find it sweet. You know I’d choose you over any of those people. I’d much rather spend time with you than them, but it’s not exactly easy to say no… but, if it makes you feel bad, I’ll make sure they know that, at least, lunch is off-limits.”

“Y-you don’t have to, but… that’s up to you.” (AKA “I want you to, but I don’t want you to feel obligated to do something just for my sake.”)

Overall! Kou’s going to be a sweetheart, even when (not very often) jealous. He doesn’t want you to think he’s silly or not trusting of you when he does get jealous- so he does his best to hide it? Still, he fails, since he can’t help but want to be at least a little closer to you!! Plus the way he pouts- he’s easily read in most situations, and that type is no different.

Mitsuba Sousuke <3

Ahh, where to begin… I suppose the same way I’ve been beginning the other two-

Mitsuba is… a complicated jealous boy? He gets jealous rather easily- and… doesn’t admit it, but makes it painfully obvious. He thinks he isn’t being obvious, but it’s practically plain as daylight.

As he does all things, he masks his jealousy in insults at first! Making his way into whatever conversation or interaction your having, offering an ‘uninterested’ “what’re you doing?” After that, he criticizes every little thing the other person does- his levels of mercy depending on how much the person deserves it.

A quick question? Minimum amount of insults. Maybe one, two if they drag it out.

Just having a normal conversation? More than a short question, but not an excessive amount. If they drag it out too long, the insults go up.

Flirting? Lays the insults on THICK. Plus, after a moment, an annoyed and rather cocky sounding: “why haven’t you gotten lost already? Can’t you see I’m (Y/N)’s boyfriend? You idiot. Moron. Pervert. Who talks to a taken girl like that??”

Touches you? Doesn’t even happen. They reach for you, and he’s smacking their hand away. “Idiot. What right do you have to touch my girlfriend?? That’s invasive. Gross. You’re so weird, trying to put your sticky little hands on her.”

But! If it’s a situation he can’t interfere with, be it because he’s dead and the other person’s alive, or in which the people needing your attention goes on for too long- he enters Sulky Mitsuba Mode.

Don’t get me wrong, Sulky Mitsuba is still full of insults, just… sad. In those times, as a ghost, he can’t help but wonder if you’re content in the relationship. Look at you… popular with other students- other students who could leave the school, buy you things, and such. He was a cute ghost, but he was a ghost. He wasn’t even really Mitsuba- he wasn’t the classmate you once knew. How hard was it for you? Yet, you gave it your best to get to know him again-

Luckily, Mitsuba has the ability to tell himself “if (Y/N) did that much for me, she must at least care.” However, it won’t get rid of all his doubts- and he’ll still sulk once you finally catch up with him.

“Hey, Mitsuba! Sorry, I’ve been busy!”

“Mh? Have you? I’ve barely even noticed you were gone.”

Terrible acting skills, Mitsuba. He looks annoyed, his voice sounds uninterested, but… it’s still somehow easy to see through his little act. He’s jealous, and you’re bound to be aware of it.

Take a seat next to him, and he’ll scoot away. Be patient- when he’s jealous, it’s like approaching a stray cat. No sudden movements or you’ll scare him away!

“I’m sorry, Mitsuba. I know I’ve been caught up today, and I’m really sad that I haven’t seen you much until now. Did you have anything you wanted to do? I’m all yours now!”

“Tch, whatever. I don’t have anything I want to do, so just leave it be.”

Ah… do I even have to mention that he’s stubborn. Apologize a bit, he’ll dismissively forgive you, and go from there. Lighthearted conversation, asking him about his day, talking about yours- slowly move closer to him, and! Next thing you know, his heads on your shoulder as he rants about something that happened.

Overall, Mitsuba does get jealous rather easily! He’s stubborn as always, partnered with his insults constantly ready to be fired- it’s interesting when he gets jealous. He never outright admits that he trusts you, and doesn’t consider much more than “I’m feeling a bit jealous since this person keeps taking (Y/N)’s attention, but he’d never put the blame on you. Just… like I said, be patient, and don’t get too offended.

[bellafragolina]

Can I see the sub bros, Elesa, and Burgh meet a s/o who says bad pick up lines all the time? Maybe they try to be smooth but end up in cartoon esque situations where things go comically wrong, maybe they just drop a handful of limes and say they needed a good pick up ‘lime’.

Oh, babe, as you've seen, I am so very down for the bad pick up lines.

🍓🍓🍓

Ingo:

Ingo is. In. Love. with you. He watches you stammer over a pick up line, or drop the corniest line on him with this big confident grin, and he just dies a little. It's so damn cute, he can't hardly stand it. How are you getting away with being this cute? It must be criminal

He's susceptible to a few of the smoother lines, and all the raunchy ones make him turn beet red. Pin him to the wall and drop something dirty on him and watch him malfunction. Good lucky getting a coherent sentence out of him after that.

Tell him train related lines. He thinks they're funny and sweet. Grin like a doof and tell him that he must be a train, since you're so a-track-ted to him, he won't be able to take it. He'll laugh and then have to excuse himself to go scream into a pillow over how precious you are. You can't keep getting away with it!

Emmet:

Emmet is the king of pick up lines, so he's armed and ready whenever you come at him. He knows a lot of bold and raunchy ones, so after you stutter out a sillier line, he's coming back and swinging for the fences. You're usually the one that ends up flustered after all is said and done.

Should you come back at him with similarly raunchy lines, however, he's pushing his sleeves up. You both fire bad lines at one another, and the first to laugh loses. Whoever wins gets treated to some sweets from y'all's favorite cafe, not to mention bragging rights.

It's a fun competition that you often win with your "pick up limes" trick and all. You wrote your number on one to give him at the station and he cried from laughing so hard. Ingo and the passengers were concerned, but you were just grinning. You got a nice slice of cake that night

Elesa:

She thinks you're cute. She has a million pun-related lines she likes to use on you, and you always laugh at them. She laughs at yours too, and thinks you're very endearing as you try and flirt with her this way. She's always been fond of more awkward flirting than confident anyway

Should you pull out something bold or dirty on her, expect a shocked look before she's laughing hard. Not at you, just at your sudden boldness. The surprise does her in, and she's quick to ask if you're serious about your offer once she's done giggling.

You two can get into little wars with your sillier lines. She'll give you endless bad puns, and you retaliate with corny lines. Skyla and the train twins always leave whenever you two get started because they know you're not stopping for a while. You two know way too many bad jokes and pick up lines. It's a little concerning

Burgh:

He un-ironically swoons a little if you manage to land a line. Otherwise, you make him laugh and coo. Burgh knows a few bad lines of his own, so you may be going back and forth for a bit before you both break down into laughter.

Should you mess up a line, however, he just chuckles and pretends to swoon dramatically, even falling into your arms. He exclaims how he has been struck dead by your charms, and how only a kiss from his true love can awaken him. Should you give him the kiss he wants, he's smiley and nearly hanging off of you afterwards

Pull the "pick up limes" trick on him, and watch him wheeze, half in disbelief you're doing this to him, half from the endearment of the flirt. He's so enamored with you and your silly ways. How did he ever get so lucky?

🍓🍓🍓

I'd think they'd all be pretty smitten with you and your silly lines <3

Have a great day, love!

~Renee

[sp00kyjellybeans]

Constant Pining [Mickey Altieri x reader]

A/N: I wanted to write something cute tee hee. Lmk if you guys want a part two to this because this was supa fun to write and I might continue it. Gender neutral reader by the way!

Word Count: 2,089

Warnings: College drinking

---

Mickey entered the lecture hall with a bounce in his step. It was his third class of the day and by far his favorite. Well, second favorite. A good runner up alongside his film class. As soon as he passed through the doorway with his folder in hand, his eyes fell to where you sat in the middle of the lecture hall. 

You were writing in your planner, five minutes early to the class as always. Mickey approached and realized you were clueless about your surroundings. Students would shove past to find a seat and you didn’t even give them hum in response.

Mickey grinned at this. He crept up behind your hunched figure and grabbed both of your shoulders, shaking them violently. 

“RAHH!!” He growled. Instead of a scream, Mickey earned a hard glare. You furrowed your eyebrows at the boy, not saying a word. “Really?” He said, exasperated. 

“You messed up my planner. I was writing something.” 

“Seriously. Not even a squeal?” Mickey dropped into the seat next to you. 

You cracked a smile, “I saw you coming. I thought about acting surprised but... I like making you work for it.”

“I’ll scare you one day, I promise you that.”

“Oh, I bet you will...” You chuckled, turning back to your planner. 

Mickey’s smile grew wide, watching your precise yet comfortable mannerisms. His glance lingered until he felt a small hand tap on his shoulder. 

“Mickey... you’re in my seat,” The film student turned to see Halley with a hand on her hip. His face drew back into a look of confusion.

“What? This isn’t third grade, we don’t have assigned seats.” 

“Maybe not but I like sitting next to (Y/n). They take good notes.”

You turned your head to watch your friends bicker. It was entertaining.

“Then I will use that to my advantage,” Mickey said and turned back to face the front. 

Halley huffed in frustration. Once she realized that Mickey wasn’t going to move, she rolled her eyes and grabbed Mickey’s shirt collar. The fabric squeezed his throat, making him jump up in surprise. Halley took her place quickly before he could do anything else.

Mickey placed his hand around his throat, glaring at the girl in front of him. “Jesus Christ son of Mary... You’re brutal...”

“Don’t mess with me, Mouse,” Halley said, not giving him a second look.

The sound of bells rang from campus meaning class was to begin. Any seats near you were taken, so Mickey was forced toward the back of the hall. He dropped his head in defeat once the professor entered.

“Did you really have to do that?” You whispered. “I mean- ...it was funny don’t get me wrong but he wanted to sit next to me.”

“And I want to pass this class,” Halley said. You pursed your lips. “Besides, this adds for a nice build-up.”

“Build-up?”

“For when he finally gets the guts to ask you out. This makes him want you more.”

“He does not want me!” You gasped. 

“Yes he does,” She grinned. “He’s staring at you right now.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Yes, I do. If I’m right, you have to come to the Delta Theta party tonight.”

You glared at Halley, “That’s Mickey’s frat house. No way. You know they get rowdy.”

“Just look!” 

You rolled your eyes, complying, and took a tiny peek at the back of the lecture hall. There sat Mickey, his head rested on his hand and looking right at you. 

The boy was in a dazed state, his eyes falling onto the back of your head in the minutes prior and he had forgotten to pull them away. Your hair was gorgeous. It fit your head perfectly. You had a really nice neck. 

The wave of your hand snapped him out of his trance.

Shit!

Mickey sat upright in his seat. He totally just got caught. Shit! Shit! Shit! His sudden movement scared the living daylights out of the students next to him. Realizing he caused a scene, he dropped his shoulders in embarrassment. Just relax, he thought. He was staring at you like a creep. No problem.

He waved back. There, that was good. You took it well. Now you’re looking away. All is well.

If he could, Mickey would have slapped himself silly on the spot. This wasn’t the first time he was caught drooling over you. All of his friends and frat bros wouldn’t let him drop it. Not since the first day of school. They could tell that his crush on you grew bigger as time went on. They would remind him of that.

And hell, he wasn’t the only one who thought you were a sight for sore eyes. He could specifically recall Randy Meeks scheming up a plan to ask you out, but the little weasel never got the courage. Other people have thought and tried but you always turned them down.

Mickey never bothered asking you out on a date, despite his strong feelings. He considered himself smooth and confident up until the idea popped in his head. What if you turned him down?

Now, a year had passed and as he feared... he was in the friend zone. He couldn’t be happier about how close you two were... but he wanted more. 

Mickey rubbed his face in exasperation. He needed a chance, he thought. Staring at you, waiting for results, won’t get him anywhere.

Since Halley’s assumption was correct, you were coming to the party. You mentally cursed her eyes that sat in the back of her head. The sound of the party blared through the wooden door in front of you. It was fine. Just a party. You don’t go to parties, but it’s fine.

You creaked open the door since it was left slightly ajar, and looked over the sea of dancing college students. This was unlike anything you’ve been to in months. At best, the most action you’ve seen was the tame cocktail mixers that sorority’s hosted.

Pushing through the crowd you made it to the backyard of the frat house. There was a pool and a few tables set up for drinks, drinks, and more drinks. Some people were even swimming. 

You scanned the crowd in hopes of finding one of your friends. Halley was nowhere to be seen, great. You let out a sigh, turned back to the sliding glass door where you had entered but stopped dead in your tracks.

Mickey stepped through the glass pane, also looking around. His hair was messy but cute and he was wearing a t-shirt that was a little tight. It squeezed the biceps you didn’t know he had. 

That was a lie. You knew very well that he had muscles.

One of his friends approached for some awkward greeting and he grinned. He smiled his toothy smile that made you melt. He was so casual yet sexy.

Goddamn you, Mickey. 

Oh no! He was coming this way! You placed a hand on your head and looked around viciously. You desperately needed to act casual. Nearby sat a table of shots. You snatched it and downed the liquid. It burned your throat but it managed to calm your nerves. 

“(Y/n)!” Mickey’s voice called out. “I didn’t realize you were coming tonight.”

“Neither did I,” You clapped your hands together. “Halley convinced me.”

“Awesome...” He smiled. Damn that smile. “You wanna dance?”

This is where you felt every pulse, every organ in your body freeze in motion. Dance? Did he just invite you to dance?

“Uh-”

“If you don’t want to-”

“No! I mean, yes... I do!” You smiled sheepishly. “Let’s dance...”

Mickey nodded in satisfaction and gripped onto your hand to drag you back into the frat house. On the way, you snatched another shot off of a table for some liquid courage, feeling the tension release from your muscles. A warm feeling spread across your chest.

On the outside, he was keeping it cool, smooth, as he always was. But the instant the word “dance” tumbled out of Mickey’s mouth, his heart was pounding a mile a minute. A part of him wished he was not sober right now. It would make this a million times easier. But he feared he wouldn’t enjoy it as much if he weren’t. 

The lights in the living room had dimmed since you first arrived. The music had definitely become louder but it was darker, the only light drawn from a lamp and a rainbow disco ball on the floor. You and Mickey were able to see each other’s faces clearly, only since the two of you were squished in the crowd of dancing college students. 

The colors on your face flashed from red to green to blue in the room, igniting a flame inside of Mickey. Your eyes shined a different way with each color. The rainbow surge that danced on your skin was breathtaking. You were breathtaking, he thought. 

“I can’t really dance that well,” You said, now realizing the mistake you made. 

“What?” Mickey yelled. The music was too loud.

“I’m terrible at dancing!” You matched. Mickey laughed, dropping his head next to your ear, his fingers touching your elbows to bring you closer to him.

“Let me show you,” He said normally. If the room wasn’t so loud, you wouldn’t have given this a second thought. But hearing his deep voice, his breath hitting your ear, break the deafening sound of music made you shudder. You nodded, looking back at him with those big eyes. 

Mickey’s hands traveled from your arms down to your hips. He pulled on the belt loops of your jeans to bring you closer to his body, “Is this okay?” You bit your lip and nodded once more. “I’m going to guide your hips...”

His large hands rested on a respective hip bone and rocked them side-to-side to the beat of the music. The song was a medium pace, a consistent beat to follow. Perfect for this moment. You looked down to see his waist matching the speed of yours, but never made contact.

“See... Easy.” Mickey said. 

He loved touching you. His hands were melted to your lower body. Everything about this felt just right. The spinning lights, the music, the lack of space between the two of you. Everything was loud and nonstop but at this moment all senses excluding sight and touch were lost. Mickey expected you to reject him before he got this far. But you didn’t. Could that mean something? Were you okay with him touching you like this?

The film student inclined his head instinctively, your own was tilted upwards for perfect leeway. Your smell was potent. Intoxicating even. It lured him in. Mickey found his nose nearly pressed against the tip of yours. 

“Holy shit, (Y/n)! At a FRAT party?” Randy Meeks slurred, landing his hand on your shoulder. “This is like seeing Bigfoot..... or some shit-”

You guys jumped away from each other, snapping out of whatever was about to happen. Mickey’s moment of ecstasy was shattered. By Randy fucking Meeks. A drunk Randy Meeks.

“I know,” You chuckled nervously. “What a surprise.”

“I totally-” Randy hiccuped between words- “Meant to ask you this sooner.... but we need to go see the next Alien movie. It’s the third out of the franchise.... and I know you LOVE sci-fi.”

Little did Mickey know, you felt the same side effects of that moment. Although you loved Randy’s geekiness, this just wasn’t the time. You wanted to shoo him away but here came another obstacle.

“(Y/n)! There you are...” Halley squealed, drink in hand, “I thought you’d never show.”

“Here I am...” You said in a sarcastic sing-song voice. Mickey was the only one who noticed your tone.

“Come here, I need to tell you something!” Halley said and yanked your arm. “Sorry Mr. Pink, but I’m taking them with me. See ya...”

“Just... glad you know the reference,” Mickey called after you two, which neither heard. He stuck his hands in his front pockets and glared at Randy. “Really?”

“What?”

“I was totally-” Mickey snapped but stopped himself from yelling. He pressed his hands against his face. “Never mind.”

Mickey ditched the geek, threading a hand through his hair. He stood in the backyard frustrated. He wanted more than anything to dunk his head in the glowing pool in front of him. But instead, he snagged a shot of tequila off of the table, letting the drink burn his throat.

So close. He was so close. 

[heyitsyn]

Nekoma!Manager!Male!Reader

a/n: never written male reader before but this was a funny request and i really do see the irony in this

anon request:  

absolutely LOVED your seijoh hcs! you said you wanted to do the other schools so i thought, how about nekoma but with a MALE manager bc it would be so ironic to have a male god as their manager rather than a goddess that they always talked about!! thank youuuuuuu!!!!!!!

yall the nekoma fanchant is literally stuck in my head

hehe uwu lets step on the pedal

ong jesus take the wheel pls

so basically,,,

being the nekoma manager is a MESS

lets say youre a second year and was only the manager bc you were begged into taking the job

like wouldnt leave you alone and pestered you 25/8, screaming about needing their own god manager

also just because, you are fairly popular and you have your own fanclub of girls in nekoma and they thought it would give them more exposure and more chances w girls :’)

tora was actually the first who came up to you and begged you to be their manager during class one day bc they are in need of one but they arent allowed to have a girl manager so he turned to having a handsome male

‘I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY IT HAS TO BE A BOY’

‘so you wont be all over him abd be distracted w showing off’

‘WHO ARE YOU TO QUESTION MY SE-’

‘tora, please’

initially, you refused bc you just couldnt be bothered to be part of a club where you basically babysit a bunch of overgrown children

but kenma, your childhood friend, was the team’s last attempt to get you in since kuroo mentioned that he was the only one you listened to

‘kenma, babie, i love you, but i am your friend, not your nanny. so unless i am paid, i will not waste my time taking care of of all of you. especially that chicken head’

‘y/n, yaku is on his last leg here. we really need a manager and we need it fast’

‘you went for years without one so why do you need it?’

‘we’re scared that nekomata would just drop dead any minute now’

‘yanno? im surprised hes even still alive with yall’

‘....... ill show your fangirls that picture of you when we were 5 when-’

‘okay, kenma. rude about the blackmail but okay. dont expect me to be the maid or anything’

nope, you were actually the maid

and the cook

and the nanny

and the laundry person

the everything

it baffles you that kuroo is about to graduate next year yet he still doesnt know the difference between fabric softener and detergent

the amount of times you sent him to pick up more and only to send him back when he ended up buying 2 softeners or 2 detergents

‘they all look the same!’

‘kuroo tetsuro cAN yOu NoT rEAd?!’

ngl i still mix them up sometimes

during matches, youre basically their mother, their nanny, and nekomata’s notetaker, and their personal cheerleader

naoi, the other coach guy, and coach nekomata has adopted you as a son bc of how hard you work and the less the burden is on them

like your notes about their playing percentages really works and helps them and added with the chores you do for the team?

godsend

also, lets put your popularity in here

you dress with a white shirt and zip up your red nekoma jacket with your red sweatpants so you look like one of the players, right?

but how come every time they have practice, youre the only one with the fangirls in the bleachers?

youre literally wearing the same thing as them yet youre the only one who gets looked at?!

even kuroo, who was quite good looking, doesnt have that many girls pining after him yet you, resident anti-tryhard, seems to get the female population to fall for you just by doing the simplest things like breathing

youd be doing normal things like using your whistle as you hold a clipboard and girls would be screeching at you 

‘omg m/n is so hot!’

‘hes just !!!! uuggghhhh’

‘siri how to be a whistle?’

i am uncomfortable with the energy we have created in the gym today

tora complains about it all the time bc first, they cant have a beautiful manager, two, they have a pretty boy who’s taking the attention away

‘SO NOT FAIR! M/N, TURN UGLY!’

you bonk him on the head in anger and threaten to quit all the time

‘say that again and you’ll be filling your own water bottles tomorrow’

but in truth though, the guys really do appreciate you and everything you do

they know that you balance them with your personal life and classes and still make time to do their laundry and make them food

so they have started easing off the burden and weight off of your shoulders

at first, you were very suspicious when they told you that they already filled their water bottles

‘huh? i didnt think you even knew where the water fountain was’

‘wym weve been doing this for years’

-kuroo

then, you heard kuroo tell the others to put their sweaty jerseys in the basket in the corner of the room and for the last person to carry it to the laundromat

‘um, sir, we dont want to have another pink jersey disaster again’

you stopped inuoka from lugging the basket but he shook his head and gave you a wide grin

‘nope, m/n-senpai! i’ll carry it for you! i’m strong, see?’

he flexed his right arm muscle while holding the basket with one hand but it was too heavy so it fell to the ground, spilling out all the practice jerseys

you sighed before bending down to pick them up and babie inuoka’s eyes watered, thinking you were mad at him

‘gomen, senpai’

he whispered but you looked up at him from your position

his watery eyes made you frantically stand up and wipe his tears with the pads of your thumbs

‘inu-kun, why are you crying? you said you were strong right? dont cry over silly things, okay?’

he nodded and you were still confused as to why he was so emotional but you patted his fluffy hair 

‘now cmon, lets go take these to the shop’

unbeknownst to you, the team was actually seething from behind the wall

naturally, as a,,, manager,, you became their,,, energy?? 

like the slightest affections from you made their health bar increase tenfold and they didnt necessarily have any intentions towards you

you were like,,, their own,,,, happy drug?? like a human seratonin??

just the fact that they had someone like you to fall back on and give them love when they lost or something

it was comforting

usually it was just the team’s responsibility to throw away their own sadness and comfort each other

but with you,,,

they could easily cry with no fear and you would comfort them until they didnt need to be comforted anymore

eventually, they ended up straight out competing against each other on who would get the most affection

clearly, inuoka used his first year card and everyone knew you were soft for your kouhais

like you would just grab them and hug them because of how cute they were

uwu especially lev?! 

he may be a giant but hes just a really REALLY REALLY BIG CAT

;)

LEV LIVES TO HUG YOU

like the mans is beanstalk level of height and despite the age difference, he just picks you up and cuddles you and youre just like ‘okay, let it out babie’

DKSFJSLD ANYWAYS

you are always a hot topic w all the students in nekoma and even some in other schools

like during training camp, bro you making everyone question their sexuality

omg akaashi and you are probably the prettiest people there and can i just say how everyone cant focus on a practice match bc youd be laughing together or something and they havent heard anything so beautiful??

and the kitties get really defensive over you and hiss at anyone who even tries to approach you

hiss hiss

DKJFSLKDFJDWHAT IF EVERYONE IN THE TEAM IS BI

OMG WHAT

like the little touches from you make them so red and confident gays like kuroo and bokuto call you out on them and tease you 

while the quiet ones like akaashi and kenma are just blushing and stutter and you tease them instead?

*inhale* BOI *exhale*

the uke and seme dynamic is real on this one

however, there are times when the turned tables

there was that one day that you were seriously questioning if bokuto wore leggings or just really high knee pads and you cornered him after baths to just figure it out

like our poor confident boi turned to a shy babie and shrunk against the wall, covering his red face

‘y-y/n-kun’

‘bo-san, i just want to know’

DKFSJLKDFJFJSDKIM DYING OVER HERE LIKE PLEASE I DONT OWN Y/N

after seeing the smidge of skin at the top of the kneepad, you nodded and brushed your fingertips over the flesh

‘hmm~ so i was right~’

FROM THEN ON POOR BABIE OWL COULDNT LOOK AT YOU THE SAME!!!!!!

it worried everyone so much when bokuto would glance at you in the sidelines and he would competely miss akaashi’s set bc his eyes would focus on you rather than the ball

like he absolutely couldnt take his eyes off of you and when you do turn to meet his eyes, he shrinks back and looks away, completely missing your amused smirk

now, your kitties werent happy about that

theyre very protective of you and they felt that this owl could snatch you right up and fly away

and kuroo, being the captain and the head of the familia, took it upon himself and dragged you to the back of the gym while the others were practicing

kurat pushed you against the wall and basically kabedonned you

KUROO IS LIKE 6′2 OR 190 CM I CANT

‘you seem close with bokuto, l/n. almost, too,, close’

an amused smirk etched itself on your lips and you pressed a hand on his chest

‘oya~? captain-san, am i being punished?’

SFDKLFSJKLDFJL SIR Y/N IS SUPPOSED TO RADIATE SEME ENERGY BUT HE ISNT AND I CANNOT-

ofc he was taken aback by your flirty attitude but he smirked and softly brushed away your bangs that slightly covered your eyes

‘hmm~~ depends, y/n-kun. are you going to be a good kitty and stay with the clowder? or are you going to stay with those pesky chickens~?’

DKFLSJDKFJSL BRO DID YOU KNOW A GROUP OF CATS IS CALLED A CLOWDER?! I DIDNT EVEN KNOW THAT BUT I HAVE A FEELING KUROO WOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT BC HE BIG BRAIN

you chuckled and gently wrapped your arms around his shoulders

but your hand grabbed the hair at the back of his head and harshly pulled him to be closer to you

your eyes blinked innocently but your sharp teeth were shown from your malicious grin

‘ive always been a bad kitty, captain. so i dont care what you say because you cant tell me what to do~’

👀👀👀👀

imagine what happens next bc i cant write something unholy

anyways

so you learned that tetsu CAN in fact tell you what to do and you avoided everyone else which caused them to wonder but one look at your neck

well,,,,,

you got attacked by a cat 

a cat named tetsu

SKDFLJSDKFJSLKUROO IS THE ONLY SEME YOU CLASH WITH

THE OTHERS ARE ALL UKE

EVEN BEEFY BUFF CAKE BOI BO

but you toned it down to not be attacked again

ngl the whole team was all jealous and they even whined to kuroo about it

‘thats not fair!!!!’

‘stop abusing your role as captain!!!!’

they hated the fact that kuroo got you first so they all rally over to keep you away from him

like baby kenma would nudge you over and bring him to sit next to you, saying he needs you to help him with a certain level

‘kenny, im not sure how to play this game’

‘hmm,,,, youre a quick learner, y/n, and youre really quick with your fingers so you could pass to the next level’

*insert lenny face*

‘oya? and you would know how, kenny?’

and baby kenny would fluster a little before glomping to your side and burying his face into your shoulder to hide away

OR

the first years would absolutely use their kouhai priviledges and bring you over to help them with ‘homework’

‘you guys realize i passed because kuroo would beat me into studying right?’

‘but senpai! you mustve learned a thing or two in your classes!’

‘bold of you to assume i was even awake in my classes’

but they still make you spend hours trying to help them which turn into just messing around 

KSDLFJSDKFJD MOVIE NIGHTS YOU GUYS THATS IT!!

there isnt really a single calm moment in your guys’ practice

poor you have already started seeing lot of gray hairs

you literally decline every single confession just because youre too busy for a date and you cant handle having to take care of another person

its like youre dating the whole team!!

soon the entire school have just accepted the fact that you are just simply not in the market anymore just because you joined the club

not because youre actually taken by a girlfriend but youre taken by a bunch of teenage males

imagine how that works out

anyways

youre not really the best volleyball player out there but you know a thing or two

well,,, its more like your stamina doesnt allow you to play long bc a single lap literally destroys your lungs

but you still know when yaku complains about having a shaky receive

‘oh, momo-senpai, youre bending your knees too low so gravity is pushing down on your-’

ugh chemistry i hate it

despite your lack of athletic or physical skills, they still appreciate you for your keen eyes, your caring nature, and your overall looks that give them motivation to play harder to impress you personality :)

all the boys love you

and tbh

you love your boys too

even though it was a blackmail caused event,

you still would’ve joined otherwise

this is kinda short but its going to be longer if i find some plots or somebody asks for a plotline that i can write about for a long time

anyways

byeeeee :)))))

a/n: this isnt exactly the best manager one ive written but ill probably find a good prompt for this or again as stated ^^ someone sends in an ask for it and ill write a story for our favorite male manager :’D

[nbrook29]

💞 My ultimate Sobbe fic recs 💞

Recently, I have gone through Robbe/Sander tag on ao3 and I decided to compose a list of fics that are absolute gems for me. A few disclaimers first:

✔ I didn’t include works in progress (WIPs), however I did include fics that are only on tumblr

✔ the order of the fics below is random

✔ this is the list of my personal favorites so if your favorite fic is not on the list it doesn’t mean it’s bad or that I consider it bad - we just vibe with different things :)

✔ if there’s a fic on this list that you decided to give a shot and loved it, please remember about leaving a comment under it to let the author know that

✔ I’ve been trying to add the “read more” thingy but it doesn’t show, I’m sorry, I know long posts are annoying af

under 1k

we’re keeping it simple by noobishere | G

Summary: Sander comes over unannounced and attacks Robbe’s very person (a.k.a the one where Sander teases Robbe on Eenvoud)

This is a guaranteed mood lifter. It’s short, sweet, to the point, and oh so funny. The banter. And I’d die to see that in the show. 

1k - 5k

Fizzy Colas by Foxsake5 | M

Summary: Let’s say this is a clip (hopefully not as short as the standard 1:40 of this season) with Sander as the main on a ‘bros night out’ 🍻

This author is my queen/king alright? They take a simple idea and turn it into the most lovely/cute/soft story. This fic is exactly that. Sobbe’s chemistry here is out of this world and the banter is to die for.

high for this by flowersmaze (@bowieskam) | G

Summary: In which Sander remains a Flirt™ and in love with Robbe even when he can’t feel his face after a medical procedure

The summary says it all. Loopy Sander is the cutest and funniest thing.

Pull Me from the Dark by TheOceanIsMyInkwell (@theoceanismyinkwell) | T

Summary: Sander discovers that Robbe has recently been prescribed antidepressants, and Robbe opens up to him about the night he almost stepped off the bridge. Only love will show how much they’ve grown and pull them through.

This time, the boys talk about Robbe’s mental state which is unusual in fics. This oneshot is communication 101. And this line is just 👌🏻 “But after the dust of their first kiss and their first vows of commitment settled around them, Robbe took a look at the space in which he floated and realized, somewhere along the line, that finding the love of your life doesn’t fix you.”

diminuendo by noobishere

Summary: Waking up feels like an ordeal. His eyes are heavy, arms a dead weight, he isn’t sure if his limbs are even in the right places, but eventually, Sander comes to. (a.k.a a take on how Sander fairs after Robbe left for school.)

Sander’s POV after Dinsdag 7:27. It’s a great insight into his headspace during that time. This could be a scene in the show because it fits so well.

you’re wonder under summer sky by nothingbutniall | M

Summary: Two city boys go camping. What could go wrong? (Everything, apparently.)

Those boys are a chaotic mess okay? They’re such dorks. This fic has the best kind of grumpiness there is and sobbe is written so in character here.

if we can make it through december (maybe we’ll make it through forever) by nothingbutniall | G

Summary: Robbe and Sander at the Christmas market.

Can you imagine those two dorks at the Christmas market? Well you don’t have to anymore because this fic is everything you need and more. And this line “Couldn’t,” Sander sulks. “You can’t hold hands properly with mittens on.” makes me go all gooey inside every.single.time 😍

A New Sunday Feeling by Foxsake5 | M

Summary:  Sander before Robbe: Ugh, Sundays 😒 Sander after Robbe: 😏🥺🥰

The way this author writes sobbe’s intimate moments is just pure talent. They have such way with words.

memories painted with much brighter ink by nothingbutniall | G

Summary: Saint Nicholas is the perfect excuse for an evening of gifts and banter with the flatshare. (Basically all five of them being cute together, and then Robbe and Sander being cute with just the two of them.)

This is the perfect fic for an October evening, when Christmas is just around the corner and you’ve just made yourself a cup of coffee and want to read some heart-warming well-written christmassy fluff. 

5k - 10k

Let’s Dance by msleviss (@sander-driesen) | G

Summary: Robbe and his friends go to a club to check out Amber’s DJ cousin.

THIS PERSON PREDICTED DJ SANDER Y’ALL. And Robbe thirsts over him. And there is an instant connection. And Robbe dances. And it’s so cute.

video phone by tokyometropolis (@luludemauryyy) | E

Summary: AKA OH MY GOD, THEY WERE QUARANTINED…except not together, because life is cruel. Thankfully it’s 2020 and when Robbe has an…er…intense dream about Sander in the middle of the night, all he has to do is press one button and Facetime him about it. Thing is…sometimes FaceTiming isn’t enough.

Look. I get that smut fics are not everyone’s cup of tea. And that’s totally fine. But. If you’re looking for a well-written smut that’s in character and where you can feel the love between the characters, this is it. Hands down. Sorry not sorry 💁🏼‍♀️

10k - 20k

our camp of dreams by robbesanderx (@robbesdriesen) | M

Summary: a summer camp!AU where robbe and sander are both co-counselors

Misunderstandings lead to pining. Teenage angst at its finest. I really like camp stories, it’s my thing.

Falling For You by silver_etoile (@azozzoni) | T

Summary: Robbe only knows one thing about football: that Sander Dreisen is the hottest player on the FC Utrecht team. When Jens drags him to a match, the last thing Robbe expects is to meet someone so perfect, and it’s all he can do not to mess it up, but will he succeed?

Sobbe in a different setting with a bit different dynamic yet still having that special something. It’s a nicely written story of the development of their relationship, first meeting, falling in love, ups and down, all the best things in fics. And Sander as a soccer player is a pretty 🔥 concept (and I think Robbe agrees).

This isn’t our first time around by noobishere | E

Summary: One moment they are in the kitchen of their shared apartment, the next, they’re in this strange but familiar room.(a.k.a the au in which they accidentally go hopping through multiple universes)

The universe takes matters into their own hands and shows those silly boys that they are meant to be. Sign me up for the ride.

Coffee and Croques by peaceoutofthepieces (@peaceoutofthepieces) | G

Summary: Sander works at the on-campus coffee shop with Eliott, and he might just have a crush on the cute boy in the brown coat.

I’m a sucker for coffeshop fics. There is just something so good about them. This one is the coffeshop!AU that sobbe deserves. Oh the pining, and the secretive looks, the silly boys, and a pinch of Elu. Me likey ☕

The finest of the meadow by allforyoumylove | M

Summary: The universe brings two lonely boys together in a flowering meadow. They fall for each other fast and hard among delicate daisies, warm summer breezes, and shooting stars.

This is magical. My comment on the work was “So soft, so beautiful, so THEM, ugh.” and I MEANT that. This is just the right amount of sweetness. This is a must read. I’m not messing around. 

two side of the same coin series by MajorAccent (@acespaceacepilot) | E

Summary: the valleys and mountains of sander’s bpd

How the boys handle Sander’s ups and downs. Robbe being the best boyfriend ever. I love how good he is for Sander, being there for him, not treating him like a baby, and not controlling him. How much he tries to make it at least a little bit easier for him. If you don’t want to read explicit stories, at least give the first part a try since it’s not E rated. 

Zaterdag 9:58 by Foxsake5 | M

Summary: What happened after the croissants dropped to the floor 🥐🤭💕

I meant it when I said Foxsake5 has great way with words. Every single piece of theirs is just “chef’s kiss”. This fic is a definition of a domestic fic. Oh, and it happened. Totally. It’s my headcanon now.

its an unrequited love by eggsntoast | G

Summary: Sander works part-time at a museum every Sunday. Robbe is a frequent visitor.

A Sander POV fic. I was sold from the beginning. The development of their relationship here is so cute, and they’re being so stupid with their pining instead of just talking to each other and you just want to shake them but at the same time you’re rooting for them so hard. Oh and did I mention pining?

20k+

Jij Verliest series by ravenbrenna09 (@djsander) | M

Summary: For the past three months, Robbe’s life—and what it once was—had been stripped away and rearranged. Now, if anything, his life had become a bit repetitive: homework, stream, ignore Thomas’s Instagram, repeat. But one Friday evening, Robbe meets a hurricane in the form of a platinum-haired tattoo artist who just might show him everything that he’s been missing.

This is a long series okay? But oh so worth it. It’s captivating and you don’t want to stop until you finish. And once you finish you’re sad it’s over even though you’ve just spent 8 fucking hours reading it. It’s amazing. But you probably know that because it’s quite popular (rightfully so). The best thing is that you expect it to go bad halfway through because it’s difficult to keep the quality on the same level in a fic that long. But it doesn’t.

Visitations by lucidpantone (@lucidpantone) | E

Summary: Does Robbe and Sander’s relationship survive into adulthood. This fic takes place in two simultaneously timelines: the past and the present.The present occurs in one entire day. Both timelines are completely out of chronological order. Everything is in clips.You can be dropped in at anytime of the day in any timeline. So clip by clip you will need to piece together what happen to Sander & Robbe and why the present looks the way it does and what happened in the past that got them there.This love story is a journey. So be prepared.In the words of one of our Even’s. It’s a complicated love story between complicated people.

This is not a regular fic. The author put so much thought into it, there are so many gems, so many little things that you have to pay attention to because it.all.matters. And there is not one interpretation. Don’t you just love when a story forces you to think and use your brain? Cause I do. Not gonna lie: this story hurts, and like the author says themselves, it’s a journey. But oh my god get in because it’s amazing. And the ending is just sjsjsjsjsddhdhsdsgdsg 🤯

the night we met by themoongirl (@dearsander) | T

Summary: Robbe Ijzermans has a brain that won’t let him sleep, a chest that feels far too heavy and thoughts that never stop.During his first year of college he meets Sander Driesen. Robbe finds what he never went looking for.

A college AU. This fic is a journey of pain and fluff and humor. It has awesome friendships. And sobbe falling in love. And liminal spaces. I read it a while ago so I don’t remember it as well as the others but you know what? I still remember that it was great and I’m lowkey happy I don’t remember it that well because now I can go and read it again. 

The Stars Look Very Different by @peaceoutofthepieces 

Summary: Robbe is bored. He’s bored of listening to his friends talking about girls, and his other friends making out, and no one ever doing anything. He’s tired of having to put in all the work, of making his own fun. He’s tired of feeling nothing so he doesn’t have to feel like nothing. His party stunts are pushing the limit, his thrill seeking beginning to worry even his friends, and his carelessness is toeing the line of dangerous.

He’s a little tired of being ‘dangerous’, too.

Sander may or may not have a crush on the older boy with the apparent death wish. He wouldn’t mind a little danger.

Once I started reading this fic, each day I was waiting for an update at the edge of my seat which was a feeling I expected from s4 that did not deliver. TSLVD definitely delivered. My favorite sobbe social media AU

Ziggy Stardust Series by skamsnake (@skamsnake) | M/E

A collection of fics taking place throughout the season. Most of them are E rated so be aware of that but it’s a really cool mixture of fluff and spice *fans myself*

[summerofpinecestcontest]

My Pinecest

by angelilith

The right words," was the last thing he had said to her.

"You don't measure your words, you don't use the right words and even less to express what you feel."

But what precisely was it that he felt? If he dug deep inside his mind he felt the sweat on his hands the moment he opened the locker, his heart racing and in the end he just dropped his head inside it to lose himself in his garbage.

The days had been long, especially amidst the questions of all the curious as to why the surprise breakup with her boyfriend Demian had not been so formal but after a couple of months things were shaky between them. Or according to him, between herself.

Mabel was drowning between the corridors thinking if someone perhaps, could also think the same as he did. Although they had made an agreement that they would say it was a mutual decision, she knew it wasn't, that Demian had his reasons, his good reasons for ending it all, as much as he loved her, and that she claimed to feel the same way. To him, it was a lie.

She never measured her words, much less her feelings.

Worst of all is when that anguish could not even appear at home, from being seen between curious eyes, to that of his parents or his brother who also wondered the same thing. She could go through stray bullets of uninteresting questions and issues, in teenage matters as her mom excused, but with Dipper things were different.

Where were her feelings? She wondered over and over again in the wee hours of the morning, tossing and turning in her bed, seeing if it was right to send a message to Demian, if talking to him again would help. Who else but she could help her in those wee hours of the morning? Where it seems like everyone is asleep, and she is the only stranger who is invaded by so many crazy ideas, and none of them seem to be right.

At that moment a soft knock on her door brought her out of it all, setting her phone aside, she shuffled her feet, finding her twin on the other side, full of worry.

- Are you all right? - He asked the moment he saw her

- Y- Yes... Why do you ask? I thought you were sleeping, by the time it's .....

- I can hear between the walls the noise that you make....

She lowered her head apologetically and wished him good night, trying to close the door, wanting to end that conversation quickly.

- Wait! - Quickly Dipper stopped the door - I couldn't sleep either, what happened at school?

- What do you mean? It's all good...

- I mean with Demian....

That question she had dodged it many times, more coming from her brother, where no matter what she would say, he would quickly realize that she would lie, and the truth at that moment even she didn't have it, because her now ex-boyfriend had only left her more doubts than something for granted, she didn't hate him or anything. But it wasn't right either.

- Only term...

- Just a term? That's all?

- Dip... I'm really tired, I really want to sleep...

- It didn't seem like a few minutes ago...! - His brother's voice grew louder with every word he uttered.

Dipper hated it when Mabel avoided him like that, when she wasn't honest with him, and even more so when something affected him and he couldn't help her, and this was one of those situations.

- Just go to sleep

- Answer me! Why don't you want to be honest with me?

- What do you care about this?

- You are not well, I have been feeling it for days and I want to help you!

- You help me by leaving me alone!

It was the last thing he said before Dipper gave up his arm and the door slammed shut.

Silence took over everything after that. Between Mabel's insomnia, and until the next day, during breakfast, class hours, lunch alone and now, just missing one more class before leaving.

She really wanted to just lie there in her locker without caring about the stares of others or the murmurs she could hear. She just wanted to survive a few more minutes and then get out of there.

She raised her head again, fixed her hair and looked for some books waiting to hear the bell.

No sooner had she closed her locker to stride forward to her classroom than footsteps stopped behind her.

- Mabel...

- Yes?

He turned to see his brother, it seemed that the last time he had seen him was last night in the midst of those screams, for he barely noticed his presence at breakfast.

- Sorry about yesterday...

- I should be the one to apologize, I didn't have to yell at you like that.

- No, I was meddling in your business....

Dipper's gaze was glued to the floor, he scratched his head nervously.

- Calm down silly, it's all right - I said while tapping him on his shoulder

- I know, I just think we need some time away from all this.

- Time out?

- Well, movie night, remember? We used to do it all the time. And I thought in a "peace accord" and before exams, some quiet would be great....

He slurred every word, sounded somewhat tense and avoided looking at her.

- Great, count me in

- Well... Well...

- I'll see you on the way out bro, we'll look for tons of junk food.

Mabel was whispering in his ear as the bell rang and they both headed to class.

On the way out, Mabel was looking for her things and leaving when she received a message from her brother, he would be a little late, he needed a book from the library for the weekend.

She went out to the parking lot looking for that gray car, a gift from her last birthday, but that lately Dipper ended up driving alone because she was going with Demian or taking the bus, like the last few days.

I needed to be alone at that moment.

I looked everywhere, seeing those who arrived and left quickly, or those who organized parties surrounded by several groups.

She didn't expect to see her ex before her brother, who approached her sweetly helping her, as her vehicle alarm went off.

Before he could hear her voice, a hail of gunshots rang out in the air, followed by screams, causing many to run everywhere, others to jump into their cars and speed off.

Mabel began to search through the crowd for her brother, calling out to him, but there was no answer. Demian grabbed Mabel pulling her away, but she insisted on staying.

The gunfire grew louder, and whoever was the perpetrator seemed to be approaching where they were.

- Let's go..! - Demian insisted

- No, I can't, Dipper was on his way, he might cross paths with him to look for me....

Demian was heard to grumble grumbling, it was nothing new to her.

Mabel struggled with the boy trying to get him to let her go in his "foolish" attempt to save her, but without any success, she had to give in.

Then we have to hide...

They both stood under the car, where they could only make out the feet of people coming and going.

Quickly the running came again, followed by more screams, and more gunshots. The shooter was right above them standing in front of the car. The tip of the rifle could be seen at his feet.

All Mabel could think about was where her brother was, Demian had pulled her so quickly that her backpack had been left on the hood of the car.

That person seemed to have chosen his point guard, he turned on himself over and over again while raising his weapon. The minutes just below their feet became eternal for both of them, Mabel's breath hitched not knowing what to expect and she could only console herself by holding the hand of the man who had been her boyfriend.

At that moment the sirens were heard, there were several patrol cars approaching, that guy looked nervous, but he raised his rifle again and charged it.

Letting hear a dry gunshot plummeting in front of both young men.

She let out a scream and Demian pressed her against him, waiting for someone to get them out of there.

Dipper took longer than he thought to get a damn book out for his report, no matter how advanced the internet was, many professors still liked to screw around with mandatory library bibliography for their papers.

He looked at his phone in search of a response from Mabel, but there was none, she was probably upset, leaning on the edge of the car with her arms crossed and a somewhat mocking look on her face.

As soon as he got it sealed so he could take it with him, he hurried his pace, but before he reached the door he saw many people running in shouting to close the doors.

"They're shooting outside!"

He was in disbelief when he tried to run out to look for his sister, but they stopped him by slamming the door in his face.

- The police are on their way, we must keep the students safe.

- Many were left out! - shouted Dipper

- If the armed subject enters here it could be much worse.

Some teachers separated the kids and led them in groups to the gymnasium, some nervously crying as they flagged down their parents to pick them up. Others were checking social media to see if there were any intrepid kids recording them live outside. Dipper, on the other hand, looked again and again at the exit door.

Although at first he had been positive to find his sister in the incoming crowd, he was discouraged at first, then dialed her several times in a ringing tone that exasperated him even more.

He didn't want to jump to conclusions, he was afraid to jump to conclusions that his worst fears would become real. He dialed again and again hoping to hear her voice, until the sirens stopped to the relief of many who were there.

Most parents and relatives had approached the school seeking the safety of the teenagers, or perhaps to make sure that their children were not among the number of children with serious injuries or deaths.

Dipper could hear as they said "there are five teenagers dead and over eight injured" those words had caused his whole body to shake and the insistence on the phone to return.

But only for a few minutes, when his mother's voice brought him out of his trance.

He stood up and hugged her tightly, for the look on her face reflected how frightened and worried she was. She would get him out of there, she would take him to Mabel.

At the front door, again, everything was surrounded by police, ambulances and yellow ribbons lining the street. Dipper ignored his mother, detouring his way to the parking lot. It wasn't too hard to miss Mabel's backpack on top of his gray car, as well as the fresh bloodstain on the ground right next to him.

He turned his eyes to his mother, waiting for answers, he knew she knew where his sister was.

- Come on Dipper - She repeated, grabbing him by the shoulders and pulling him towards her car.

He simply grabbed his backpack until he climbed into the vehicle, pulling his phone from inside with the thousands of calls on it.

- Where is Mabel?

- At home, she is fine

- Wounded? This wound?

- No

- Are you lying to me?

- Calm down, it's okay. Your father looked for her at the hospital...

- Hospital...

Something wasn't focusing on her mother's words, nothing gave her the security she felt, let alone peace of mind.

It took forever to get home, after passing a long line of cars on the way to school, cameras and other people who were just trespassing.

As soon as the woman parked, Dipper bolted out of the vehicle and ran to her house, turning the door handle down again and again, realizing it was locked. With the lights on inside.

Hearing the turn of the key, she saw her father on the other side, his eyes looked tired, he was still wearing the shirt he had put on in the morning, although she knew that he usually came home later, it was more than clear that he had gone out for "an emergency".

- You can calm down and be quiet," his father chirped.

Dipper took a big breath of air before stepping over the threshold of his home, seeing the living room surrounded by several pillows and blankets leaving him to notice his sister asleep on the edge of one of the couches.

Before he could run over her, he felt a gentle tug, from his father stopping his stride.

- Let her rest. She had a nervous breakdown, they took her to the hospital because they couldn't calm her down. And from there the school called me... She's still sedated...

- It's my fault," said Dipper, gritting his teeth. - If I had come out earlier...

- Don't say that son - She interrupted him - They are both fine and we are grateful for that...

- Well? - His eyes were beginning to water, for a few minutes before he had only tragedy in his head.

When the guy collapsed on the floor Mabel was sure she could see his eyes wide open along with the shot mark on a fully opened head.

Demian pressed her against his chest trying to avert his gaze as he crawled backwards trying to get out from under that vehicle.

- Don't worry, it's all over - I kept telling her over and over again.

She returned his embrace, wiping away her tears for the moment with the cuff of her sweater.

Police were approaching where the shooter's body was already lying, and others were approaching them.

- Are you all right? Ambulances are on the way

- We are both fine," said Demian, raising his hands in peace.

Mabel turned away from him looking around again and again.

- Dipper... Demian, I need to know where my brother is.

A policeman stopped her

- It is better that they stay where they are until some authority comes, there are several boys injured, and others dead. The best way to facilitate this is to stay out of our work.

- My brother was coming here before this started, he could be hurt...he could be....

- Mabel, they shot your brother! - shouted one of her companions who was being carried by a paramedic.

- No- no-no-no

She let go again trying to run, this time it was Demian who was pulling her to the ground to keep her still.

- You heard the officers, you may hinder their work if you interfere.

- What if he is injured?

- Look around Mabel, there are ambulances and others that will be arriving to help.

- And if this -

Demian just looked away, not knowing what to say...

- I have to see it for myself

- And what will that accomplish? You were going to risk your life just to look for Dipper, he can take care of himself too. He can take care of himself too. Can you?

She looked up at him, her lips trembling along with her whole body.

- I need to know where it is

Demian refused to let go of her no matter how hard she struggled, kicking or screaming. Even he couldn't recognize her under those situations.

She managed to attract the attention of the medical staff by forcibly assisting her.

After a few hours her father appeared at the hospital, taking her home, assuring her that everything was fine, that her brother would be home any minute. And although he repeated the same thing a thousand times, Mabel burst into tears, not believing anything as she hesitated, words without understanding, her face covered in tears.

For eternal minutes we both lay on the couch looking for something other than the news replaying the tragedy.

And before he could notice she was falling asleep surrounded by pillows and blankets.

Perhaps, when he wakes up he would be better off.

- It was just a scare - repeated the man, his son, giving a little peace of mind.

- Go take a shower, Dipper, and come on down. We'll wait for you here

Dipper looked at his parents and then at his sister who was sound asleep.

- She may not wake up until tomorrow, she'll be fine.

He climbed up at a slow pace while he thought about every action before that "accident" and reviewed everything in reverse, until he reached the moment of the fight.

He watched the half-open door to her room, before entering the bathroom and losing himself in the shower for a few minutes.

If I had done something different... Maybe things would be different. But in a good way?

Once downstairs, everything seemed to have calmed down.

Still, no amount of talk, no amount of questions could undo the knot she felt in her chest. Both parents' attempts were in vain.

After a few hours her father tried to carry Mabel upstairs, and she began to whimper, moving around and getting rid of him no matter what he said. Falling back onto the couch. covering herself under the blankets.

- And so it has been since he arrived," sighed the man.

- Can I - Can we stay here?

Asked Dipper stumbling over the words.

- Are you sure?

- You said it, we're fine...

Soon the lights went out and he lay on the sofa bed next to his sister.

He wasn't tired, but he wanted to give his parents some peace of mind, until they went to their room.

He waited a few minutes before crawling right to where Mabel stood whispering her name over and over again.

Suddenly hands came out from under the blanket colliding with her face, giving her small, slow caresses that made her heart race.

All a breath of air before discovering her removing the blanket and seeing a face drenched in tears, as she whimpered almost silently so no one would hear

- Hey, what's going on?

He moved closer to her who jumped up grabbing him by the collar, pulling him onto the couch beside her.

Dipper returned the embrace listening as she continued to cry.

- All is well. You are fine.

- You're here - She stammered

- I don't want to be anywhere else

- But someone said you were hurt...

- No- No, I'm fine look at me

Mabel forced a smile, unable to hold in all the pain, as she pressed herself closer to her brother's chest. Listening to his racing heart and how his arms pressed her tighter against him.

They were silent for a long time, no one dared to say anything. Their planned night was left in absolute darkness.

- Are you asleep?

- Demian told me the same thing again, the same words of the breakup....

- Were you with him?

- It was just a coincidence, the shooting started the second he crossed my path.

Mabel slurred every word. She was lying on top of her brother watching a muted television while he slowly played with her hair.

- He wanted to get away from it all, he dragged me along trying to get us to escape... but I couldn't abandon you.

- I was inside the school... it took longer than I thought in the library, I'm sorry...

- I wasn't going to abandon you, Dipper...And that bothers him.

- Wait... They broke up because of me? What?

- No, no... that's not it....

- What did Demian tell you?

- Your safety and your well being really matter a lot to me Dipper, I don't know what I would do if something happened to you.

- What did Demian tell you, Mabel?

- If only you could feel half the love you have for your brother with me... No matter what you tell me, no matter what you deny me, you don't measure your words Mabel and much less your feelings... And we ended up with

Dipper felt some of the air escaping from his lungs, his hands trembling.

- What are you talking about?

- In the hallways some spit a "weird" Demian is not bad, but....

- Are you wrong?

- I don't know, what do you think?

- That I didn't deserve you

He let out a slight chuckle causing his sister to stand up to face him a little surprised.

- What do you feel, Mabel?

- I don't know...

- Well, do you want to know how I feel? A few hours before I was so afraid that something was going to happen to you, I yelled to my mom hoping they would tell me about you. I had seen blood near the car and just thought the worst. You are my best friend in the whole world. And when I saw you okay, it was like being able to breathe calm again, I don't care what anyone else says, what Demian says. Wrong or not I care about you too much too, I would die if anything happens to you. I love you too much that many times I just hope to come home and see you. I just want to see you well, and I want you to be happy with someone, anyone, who can understand you with all you are....

Before he could speak any further he felt Mabel's lips on his, and before she could pull away he moved in closer deepening the kiss, letting his tongue enter his sister's mouth, feeling her breathing begin to quicken.

As soon as they parted they looked at each other somewhat surprised, but he was holding her hand and she was holding his face.

- Today you are all I need. You're all I want

The pieces fit together of how Mabel avoided him at times, how he really felt weird in the face of indifference, but they couldn't, no matter how much they wanted to, be apart for long.

And that early morning, both of them piled up on the couch proved it.

How their hands searched for each other at the same time as those longed-for embraces, and little kisses between dreams.

In the morning everything was totally silent. Her parents had gone out earlier.

Dipper was slowly opening his eyes, his whole body ached from how uncomfortable the two-person couch was, but Mabel didn't even seem to notice.

As soon as he tried to free himself, she woke up.

Her half-open eyes and a somewhat blank stare resembled his.

As good as everything had turned out, the last few hours left him with a raw hangover of honesty and reality.

Although at times they preferred to ignore it all by tidying up the mess in the living room. Facing each other at the breakfast table, it was hard to pretend there was nothing there.

He was the first to react by taking her hand to get her attention.

- Last night...

- It's okay... I think it was an impulse, we were nervous about what happened.

- What did you tell me about Demian?

- Just forget it Dipper

What else could be done? They couldn't just stop being siblings overnight, or start a relationship easily.

They tied a noose around their hands struggling with their feelings and doing the right thing. Fears arose at the mere thought that if they assumed their impulses the rest was uncertain and unsafe.

Would they take the risk and could their parents tolerate it?

They both looked on, their tired eyes forming. Maybe this way, without words, without actions they could understand that they should finish something that had never started.

For the best towards each other.

Mabel picked up his plate and went up to his room, and he only listened to the footsteps until his door closed, before holding his head in both hands, resigned, tormented with so many feelings that he couldn't even digest one.

He loved her so much, so much not to drag her down with him.

The whole scare to death just made everything I was feeling worse.

He understands that he was not losing her, they would simply take the distance that needed to be taken, she would never leave his side, would she?

He walked to his room, he would just let the hours pass, let time settle everything. For all he had in his head were bad choices.

But before she buried herself in her only shelter the door next door slowly opened revealing her sister.

- Aren't you going to tell me anything anymore?

Her words were full of fear, her crystalline eyes stared at him without wanting to turn a millimeter away.

- What do you want me to say?

- The first thing on your mind

- I love you

[hoseokslefteyebrow]

WANTED || J.JK || 2

HER

Pairing : Jungkook X Reader

Genre : fluff, angst, crack

Summary : “Let me geuss, your parents are dead and you're family with one of my mates so that's why you're staying with us for a while?”

“Um, no. Sorry. Just running for the authorities and your window was open.”

Wordcount: 0.7k

WARNINGS : none it's only the prologue calm down.

WANTED MASTERLIST || NEXT 

" At what time are you supposed to be home? Or do you live by yourself?" Jin asks you as you, him, Jungkook of course, and their five housemates are all watching a movie together.

" Oh, uhm, right. I think it's time that I go home." You say while smiling sheepishly.

" Do you live on quite a distance?" I can drop you off if you'd like."

" No, it's alright. I live on a walking distance." You answer him.

" Oh okay. Jungkook can walk you home." Jin smiles.

Junglook looks up in suprise from his bowl of popcorn, and you are suprised too.

" That's not necessary. I can walk home by myself just fine-"

" No, don't be silly. You're Jungkook's geust. He can at least drop you off at home." Says Jin, as if you even know Jungkook.

" No it's alright, else he'll have to walk home by himself even later and that can be even more dangerous-"

" Jungkook has a black belt in Taekwondo. He'll be fine. I just want to make sure you get home safely." Jin says before he slaps Jungkook's tigh.

" Get off your lazy ass and bring your friend home." He tells the younger.

Jungkook rolls his eyes, but to your suprise he actually listens and gets up.

" C'mon. I want to be home before midnight."

A few minutes later the two of you walk outside. You put your hood on so that people won't recognise you. You don't want to meddle Jungkook in your mess after all.

" So where do you live?" Jungkook asks after a moment of silence.

" Not far from here." You answer dryly.

He looks about done with you.

" You said you were running for the authorities. What exactly did you do?" He asks curious.

" I can't tell you a lot about it because else you'll be involved in this mess too. But it's not exactly my fault." You're fairly proud by your answer.

Jungkook rolls his eyes.

" Thats much I understood yeah. For how long do we have to keep walking?" He complains.

You shake your head and stop walking.

" Nope, we're here." You say.

" What? You live in the container?" Jungkook jokes as the two of you stop in front of an alley.

You shrugg your shoulders.

" I live everywhere and nowhere." You say with an emotion which Jungkook does not know how to adress.

He looks around before it suddenly clicks in his mind.

You look fairly taken care of, so Jungkook hadn't expected this.

" If your bros ever ask for me again, just tell em' that I moved out of town or something. Also, thanks for the meal. I truly appreciate that." You smile at him, as if you're actually heading in a house.

You turn around to walk away, but he grabs you by your wrist before you can take a step away from him.

" How many times do you eat a day?" He suddenly asks with a dead serious expression.

" Does that really matter?" You ask him dryly.

" Yes answer the question."

" Listen, it don't matter-"

" Goddamnit Y/N! Just answer the question!" He yells in irritation.

" Five times..." You mutter.

He gives you a look which tells you to carry on.

" .... A week... If I'm lucky six..." You say in shame as you avoid eye contact.

Jungkook breath stops as he just looks at you.

An idea enters his mind, but he's not sure if it's a smart one.

Becausr in the end, he knows nothing about you.

Only that you might be some kind of criminal.

But as he looks at you right now, with no jacket, a thin shirt, and walking around in summer shoes while it's autumn, he already knows you're most likely not lying.

He doesn't believe his own words as he speaks, but he doesn't take them back.

" Come live with me. For now at least."

[ A/N: Y'all seem to like the crack, but it's got an actual plot so get reAdy for sad moment- no, sike but jk.]

[tloujm]

Part XVII: Funnel of Love

Author’s Notes: Sorry it took so long.

Genre: Fluff + Angst = this chapter

Summary: This takes place right after the last chapter. The newly engaged couple share the news with their loved ones. The wedding planning pressure is on. 

Ship: Joel x Reader

“Well, well, well. Big bro is doing it for real this time, huh.” Tommy began with a wide grin on his face. “Congratulations, Joel. I mean it. I always knew it was gonna be the two of you since the first day y’all showed up at the gates.” Joel relieved one of the watchtower guards so he could talk to Tommy about the proposal. They were both up in the small wooden shelter, rifles in hand, glancing between each other and the world beyond the gates.

“Thanks, brother.” Joel donned a bashful smirk.

“So do I get to be best man?” Tommy asked.

“Weren’t you already best man?” Joel countered.

“Yeah, but that time didn’t really count.” Tommy explained. Joel shot him a glare as a response to the dismissal of his first marriage. He knew that this time was different though, so he couldn’t blame him.

“‘Course you’re my best man.”

*****

“Joel? Miller? Of the infamous Miller brothers?” Jesse exclaimed.

“You knew we were together.” You said. Jesse was your closest friend at the settlement, therefore, he was the first person you told. You had reservations about sharing the news with him because, for a moment while you and Joel were broken up, you grew feelings for Jesse. It was something you never shared out loud or in your journal. Not sure of whether the feelings truly stemmed from Jesse himself or your emotions from Joel, you didn’t feel right giving weight to those thoughts. Despite Joel’s suggestion, you always figured Jesse’s feelings were purely platonic anyway.

“Yeah, I know. It just seems very official. I didn’t think people still did that these days.”

“He did manage to surprise me. It was very romantic. You should take some notes just in case you feel compelled to do the same with a special somebody.”

“Take notes? From Joel? Miller? I can be quite romantic on my own, thank you.” Jesse turned to you. “But listen, I’m happy for you. Whatever you need for your upcoming nuptials, let me know.”

“Thank you, I appreciate that.” You responded. It fell silent for a moment while the two of you were cleaning up the stable. 

“I bet you Joel can get you guys a senior discount on a wedding cake from the bakery.” Jesse spoke up. He broke into a fit of laughter as you dropped your broom and threw a handful of hay at him.

“He is not even that old.” You responded defensively.

“No, no. He’s just regular old.” Jesse reasoned jokingly.

“He’s young at heart!”

“(Y/N), He plays the guitar on a rocking chair and whittles for fun.”

“He does other things for fun that I can tell you right now he is not too old for.” You replied with a coy tone in your voice. 

“Alright, alright.” Jesse shook his head playfully and continued sweeping up the straw on the ground. “The jury is still out on how old he is, but I suppose we can both agree that he’s not geriatric.” He reflexively ducked when he heard you drop the broom again to pick up some more hay. 

“So I’m invited to the wedding then?” He asked seriously.

“Of course you are! You’re my best friend.” You replied.

He clears his throat. “Yeah…”

*****

“Honey, I’m home.” Joel said. The words flew out his mouth in a jovial tone. He had never said those words before. It reminded him of a husband from the 1950s coming home from a day at the office. That particular visual didn’t enthuse him, but the idea of seeing you again did. He knew that he’d never wear a suit and work in an office, but he hoped that the rest of his life consisted of coming home to you.

“My love, I’m in here.” Your voice carried from the kitchen. He quickly followed until he stopped right behind you. His arms snaked around your waist as he kissed the top of your head. “What did you do today?”

“I spent some time with Tommy.” He went to go sit down at the island.

“Oh?”

“He asked how our trip went.” He began. You turned to face him.

“You told him about us?” You asked, smiling. He nodded.

“Yeah,” He chuckled. “He asked to be my best man. Did you tell Maria?”

“Yeah, I told her after Jesse.”

“Oh good. He knows.” He began sarcastically. “I better stop catchin’ him gazing at my bride then.”

“Joel, stop. He always knew we were together. But as for Maria, she was super excited. She started talking about wedding stuff like we weren’t living in some fungal zombie infested world. It’s not like I can go dress shopping, or cake tasting or pick out venues. I mean honestly, what’s the point of a wedding?”

“You don’t wanna have a wedding?” He asked.

“I don’t know.” You shrug. “All I want is to get married to you. She was just planning it all out the second I told her and I was feeling overwhelmed.”

“She’s just excited. Take a breath then go back and talk to her. If anyone’s got the connections to throw a wedding, it’s her.”

“What was your wedding like?” You asked.

“You wanna know?” You nodded. He sighed. “It wasn’t much. We cut costs wherever we could so I wore a hand-me-down suit from my dad and Tommy wore a hand-me-down suit from me. The only thing that matched on our suits were the buteniers. It was in one of her aunt’s backyard. It was dead in the middle of summer after school let out, but the only decorations were red, green and blue Christmas tree lights that she put on the bushes. I remember her aunt tasked me and Tommy with going to get some flowers. She gave us some money, but my God, I had no idea how expensive real flowers were. I bought Sarah’s mom a bouquet from the florist while Tommy dumpster dived for some dying flowers that they had just thrown out for the rest of the wedding party.” He shrugged. “The ceremony was quick. The reception was a potluck; everyone brought a dish and their own fold out chairs. Outside of my cousin singing a song, the music was from a boombox. It was simple, but it all came together. I had my own issues with my parents and her side of the family didn’t like me much after I knocked her up, but for that one day, we all got along and it was nice.” 

“Oh. Wow. At least everyone got along.”

He chuckled. “I know it was nothing impressive. It was a shotgun wedding for a couple of teenagers. But I don’t want you to worry about how that went. What matters is now and how we want things to go for us.”

You smiled. “Our wedding can go the exact same way and I wouldn’t care so long as you’re there.”

****

“So,” Maria slammed down a stack of wedding magazines on the coffee table. “I think looking through these would be a good start.”

Maria invited you and some other women over one evening to have a girls night. She had never done this before, but she felt your impending marriage was a good excuse to have one. You didn’t have many female friends. Most were acquaintances, so none of them were as close as Maria and Wendy to you. They were there, but so were a handful of others you’ve only ever spoken to in passing.

Maria had a growing wine collection. She would trade for a bottle or two every so often. For your special occasion, she dusted off two bottles. Wendy made you a homemade pin that said “Bride to be” which she insisted you wear all night. Maria passed the magazines all around the circle you guys made on the floor.

“Maria, where did you get all of these.” You asked.

“I’ve had them all this time. While I was on a scavenging trip one day, and this was years and years ago, I saw them and grabbed them. It was impulsive. I don’t know. Me and Tommy had been together for a while and you know, naturally I started hearing wedding bells even though he never really proposed. I know it's silly to expect happiness in the middle of all this craziness, but it became normal for him and I and despite all this, he stuck by my side. I spent my whole life pre-outbreak wanting a wedding. I mean I wasn’t obsessed with it, but what girl doesn’t want a little fairytale wedding?”

“Tommy never proposed? I thought you guys were married?” Sheila spoke up in between sips.

“We’re basically married. Obviously not under law, but we committed ourselves to each other. I wanted to stop running and just build a future, even a tiny one, for us. He wanted the same. So we settled down and built this place. Well ‘settle down’ as much as we can in this type of world now. But, it was all casual. He brought it up one day while we were eating. He asked if I’d ever want a husband. He asked if it mattered to me.”

“What did you say?” Wendy asked.

“I told him, of course it mattered. At least to me. He gave me that famous Miller half smile,” Maria looked to you as to say ‘You know what I’m talking about’. “And asked if I thought he was husband material. I kinda strung him along for fun. I told him ‘As close to husband material as he can get’. He let out this little laugh and said ‘Well it’s settled then.’ and I thought to myself, I get to be someone’s wife! But not just anyone’s wife, his wife. At that point I couldn’t stop smiling. It wasn’t a proposal in the traditional sense. I guess it still counts, but we never did anything about it since. I guess we just assumed marriage from that point on. We expressed our love for each other, but never spoke the traditional vows. He never called me his fiance. As a matter of fact, the first time I heard him call me his wife to another person was when you and Joel showed up at our door.” She spoke in a roller coaster of tones, switching between enthusiastic and disappointed. “So I want you to have something special to commemorate this moment with. It’s not going to be a big, fancy wedding, but something nice nonetheless.” She said to you.

“Thank you.” You replied.

“Ohhh, look at this dress! I think this would go great with your figure, honey.” Darlene stated as she handed you the opened magazine. You admitted it was nice, but you couldn't see yourself in it. 

“That’s a bit plain, don’t you think? How about this one.” Maria handed you her magazine. The dress was exceptionally grand. It had a train and was adorned with crystals and lace.

“That’s quite the dress, Maria.” You commented, not wanting to hurt her feelings.

“But do you like it?” She asked.

“I do,” It wasn’t a whole lie. “But what’s the point in looking at dresses? I’m not gonna be wearing any of them from these magazines. I don’t own any white dresses at all. Just a white t shirt with sweat stains and holes in ‘em.”

“It doesn’t hurt to fantasize a little bit. Besides, maybe we’ll go out and find a store with something nice to wear inside.” She replied. 

“Drink up, honey, you're supposed to be happy.” Darlene said as she watched you nurse your glass.

“I am happy.” You replied with a straight face.

“Let’s play This or That and let’s pretend it was 13 years ago and the world was normal again. I’ll ask you to choose between two different things, wedding themed of course. I want you to give me an answer quickly to ensure it’s the truest answer.” Maria suggested.

“What were you doing 13 years ago?” Darlene asked you.

“Just graduated college. Didn’t even get a chance to apply my degree anywhere.”

“Oh, you were just a youngin’. Still had milk ‘hind your ears.” She playfully slapped your thigh. “And let’s see...Joel must have been how old…” She pondered seriously.

“Vanilla or chocolate?” Maria spoke up.

“What?” You asked.

“Cake. Vanilla or chocolate for your wedding cake?”

“Uh, chocolate.”

“Outdoor or indoor venue?”

“Indoor, I guess.”

“DJ or band?”

“DJ?”

“Lillies or Peonies for your bouquet?”

“I don’t think I know what peonies look like, to be honest.”

For the rest of the night, you and the other women played wedding themed games that you were sure Maria made up. They fiddled with your hair and dabbed beet juice on your lips and cheeks to appear as makeup. Despite Darlene rubbing you the wrong way, you took her advice and ‘drunk up’. Getting loose helped, but it still was all a bit overwhelming to you. Part of you wanted the fairytale like Maria said, but part of you didn’t even want it at all. While a fairytale would look nice, it would come with too many cons and then you would think ‘what was the point’. There would be too many people, and as an introvert, you weren’t prepared for that. Having to coordinate a large amount of food to feed the party, acquire a form of entertainment to keep everyone busy, ceremony rehearsals, picking loyalties when choosing between your sister in law and your good friend for made of honor and so on. Honestly none of your female friends were as close to you as Jesse, though, but you didn’t think he nor Joel would be cool with him being your main bridesmaid. 

Still buzzed, you walked into your empty house and beelined it to the bathroom. You sat at the edge of the tub, warm water running through your fingers as you watched it fill up. You grabbed your portable CD player and headphones out the drawer next to the toilet. You adjusted yourself into the inviting bath and immediately slipped your head under the surface. Being underwater was always a relaxing feeling for you so long as you knew you were in control. Your hands held onto the sides of the tub, keeping you under. You stayed there with your eyes closed until you couldn’t take it anymore. The curls of your hair laid flat against your head as you took in a large breath. As weird as it was, it helped the anxiety that you were currently harboring. The cherry on top was your music. You reached over the edge and felt for the play button before sliding the headphones over your ears. Again, you closed your eyes. You weren’t thinking about anything in particular: your patrol duty tomorrow morning, your promise to have lunch with Maria and Darlene, and sure as hell not your wedding. 

The buzz was wearing off, but the warm water took over the job and continued to relax your muscles. You were three songs into the album you were listening to when they abruptly tensed up. Your eyes popped open at the sudden splash of water that landed on your chest. It felt as though only a moment ago you were alone in the world and now sitting on the edge of the tub is Joel. He watched as you scooted up, sloshing the water around. 

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to splash you that hard.” He chuckled before pointing to your CD player. “You gotta be careful with this, (Y/N), you know. Gotta have your wits about you even in a place like Jackson---”

“I know, I just wanted to unwind for a moment---” You butted in.

“I don’t mean to chastise you like you’re a child, but I just want you to be safe. What if it wasn’t me here.”

“All the doors are locked.” You reasoned.

“Still.” He gave you his famous glare for a solid moment before his eyes drifted down to your body in the water. “Room for one more?” He lifted his eyebrow.

You frowned. “I was about to get out.”

“Didn’t look like that to me, darlin’. If I’d chosen to watch you for longer, you’d still be laying there with your eyes closed.”

“How long were you watching me for?” You asked, starting to feel a mix of self consciousness and arousal.

“Doesn’t matter.” Joel’s face was rid of emotion save from his eyes. His eyes were lit up with lust despite your rejection.

“The water was getting cold. I was just waiting for the song to end before getting out.”

He lifted the same eyebrow. “Is that so?” His eyes followed your body as you stood up in the tub. He unfolded his arms and grabbed the towel on the back of the door. Holding it out, you stepped out of the tub and into the soft fabric. He slid his hands up your arms before massaging your shoulders. His hands were rough and ungentle, but you still let him continue. “Baby, tell me what’s wrong. Who hurt you? I’ll go grab Tommy’s bat and smash their kneecaps in.”

You chuckled. “While I’m sure you would,” You turned around, releasing your shoulders from his grip. “No one hurt me. I’m just...I just got some stuff on my mind.”

“Care to share?” He asked. You shrugged. “Was it something that happened at Maria’s?”

“She threw me a bridal shower.”

He sat on the toilet and pulled you down onto his lap. “That was nice of her.”

“I mean yeah, it was nice. It just...It felt forced. Women were there that I hardly knew. We were planning the wedding, imagining details I knew would never work. I feel like Maria wants this to happen more than I do and I hate that. I should want this the most. I mean I do want this,” You point between you and him. “But I just don’t know how I want to go about it. I thought seeing her again would help me make up my mind about things, but I feel just as confused and flustered.”

He kissed your shoulder. “I don’t want you to stress out over this. It’ll all work out, because the most important thing in the end is that we have each other. I promise,” He kissed your shoulder again. “Ok?” He waited for you to say it back before tapping your thigh. “Now, just because you didn’t want me to get in with you doesn’t mean I don’t want a nice, relaxing bath too. Last chance before you put your clothes on.” He pointed between you, him and the tub as if asking for you to join him. 

You smile with a shake of your head. “No, my skin is all wrinkly but I promise to only keep the towel on if you promise not to make me wait long.” You winked at him. 

[cabinofimagines]

In the end, cleaning wins.

Percy x gn!reader

Summary: Percy and Y/n are trying their best to be adults. Between work, school, being a demigod, and keeping up the apartment, something or someone was bound to snap.

A/N: Bro I’m always so bad at writing fight scenes since I’m such a peacekeeper lmao. I try to avoid conflict often so rip if this isn’t good.

-Day

_______________________________________

Being an adult is exhausting. 

No seriously, it is. Percy hadn’t slept in over 26 hours at the fault of his new job at the aquarium. It held unusually odd hours, the only upside being a nice pay and working with sea creatures. He loved it, but the position and people he had to work with were obnoxious in many ways.

He stayed up all night trying to cram for a chem exam coming up, but he would’ve slept an hour at least if he’d known the bullshit coming his way. He left home yesterday morning for his bio lecture where he zoned out for 2 out of the 3 hours. Unfortunately, homework was assigned based on the day’s lecture. Amazing. Then, he was called into work directly after because the opening manager flaked out. Also amazing.

The school was across town from the aquarium so he figured he could catch some sleep on the subway, but before he even boarded, a group of dracaena ambushed him. He took off running, hoping that maybe he could lose them instead of having to fight. If he fought in this sluggish state then he’d probably screw up and shish kebab himself.

 He could probably just run to the aquarium from here, take a few back alleys and shake off the slithering psychos. He turned to check if they were still following and to his surprise, they were right on his heels. Pretty fast for creatures with no legs. Or would having the ability to just… glide be faster? Like being on skateboard?

Now really wasn’t the time to be thinking of dracaena with skateboard bodies.

He turned sharply and took the fire escape three steps at a time. He wasn’t sure where this was going, but he was fairly certain that in the prospect of jumping buildings, the person with legs had the upper hand. He could hear the dracaena hissing out things like “get back here, sssson of the sssssea god” or “come here, child”. How the Hades are they still behind him?

He saw the edge of the building approaching and realized that maybe it was a little too far of a jump. But he was already flying over the gap and praying that his ankles don’t snap like twigs when he lands. 

Luckily, he made it. He hit the ledge with his chest, his arms pulling him up. He scrambled to his feet, ready to turn and fight if that jump didn’t shake them. Turns out that it did work, because he’d the pleasure of seeing the failed attempt of the hissing heathers falling one by one into the gap between the buildings. He heard them yelp out curses on the way down, but wasn’t sure if they combusted into dust or not. 

He decided to roof hop for most of the way to work, one because it was a little faster this way and because he had less of a chance to run into bored monsters. Man, he was glad that he didn’t have a manager to answer to this time, they’d probably just be glad he showed up.

---

Percy prided himself on being a pretty chill person both at work and on the regular. However, there wasn’t a day that passed where he wondered if he should just hop in one of the tanks and pretend to be a fish. The sea otters seem pretty stress-free.

He was exhausted and running on energy drinks he’d bought from the gas station a little ways from work. What was supposed to be a 6-hour shift on his one day off turned into him working from 11:30 am to midnight after the evening manager decided to leave early. Percy was never one to complain when others went home before him, in fact, he usually chooses to go last unless he has homework due at 11:59. But when Cooper decided Percy could handle closing the aquarium by himself, he lost it. 

He took the last bus home, thankfully, his trip home was quieter than his trip to work. He sat in the back, head tilted toward the window as he tried to calm the headache that tortured him. He was pretty sure that Y/n would be asleep by now, they had an early morning and he didn’t expect them to wait up for him… but tonight, he really hoped they did.

The promise that Y/n would be there, asleep or not, was comforting enough to him. He wanted nothing more than wordless cuddles and a deep sleep right now. 

----

Walking through the building door he noticed the hall light was off– correction, it was blown. No biggie, Percy had found his way in the dark multiple times, but the stairs seemed to be a different story. He tried so hard to be quiet on the way upstairs, but he managed to trip over the ledge. He swore quietly, fumbling for the railing and hoping his neighbor was dead asleep.

Ronnie often threw fits over the amount of noise the couple made, even if it wasn’t much of a ruckus, Ronnie always claimed that his keen ears could hear everything. He still hadn’t forgiven Percy for the quip he made about maybe turning his hearing aids down, but he will. Hopefully.

Somehow he made it to the apartment door in one piece fumbling for his keys and unlocking the door. He took note of the darkened place and figured that maybe Y/n really did go to bed. It’s alright, Percy was ready to crash and catch a few hours of sleep.

But the lamp was on in their bedroom and the door was cracked open still, so… are you up?

Percy kicked off his shoes and dropped his book bag by the door, trudging over to the bedroom and nudging the door open. Sitting upright in the bed sat Y/n reading a book he’d bought for your birthday. Percy smiled, you looked so cute bundled up in his old uni t-shirt. 

Your eyes shifted to him, crinkling with happiness, “You’re back?” You didn’t move though, clearly comfortable under the heavy duvet. 

He nodded with a small smile, moving over to your side of the bed and placing a quick kiss on your forehead, “I’m gonna take a shower and grab something to eat, you go ahead and get some rest.”

After he turned to leave you heaved a sigh, not sure how to bring this up when he’s as tired as he is. Maybe this could wait until tomorrow? Then he’d be less tired and maybe… no, you already put this off long enough. He’ll be tired regardless of when it’s brought up, might as well get it over with.

So you sat there, not really even reading the words on the page anymore, your thoughts wandering from the universe the author had written about. It really shouldn’t have been this nerve-wracking. It’s a basic thing that needs to be done in every house and you were getting tired of doing it every single time.

Cabinets shutting brought your attention back to the present. Reluctantly, you pushed the duvet back and shuffled towards the kitchen, Percy eating a PB&J sandwich coming into view. He looked like a little kid, leaning against the counter in his black sweatpants and a graphic tee, munching on a small sandwich he made. You grinned and leaned beside him, ignoring the confused glances he gave.

“You miss me that much?” He joked, mouth full of food.

You snorted and looked down, something you tended to do when you got nervous. He seemed in a good mood despite whatever may had happened today, so it’s now or never.

“I actually wanted to talk to you about something,” you mumbled, “And I know you’re tired but I feel like this is only going to get worse if we don’t talk about it now.”

Percy blinked and continued to eat, his silence a cue to continue. He didn’t really want to talk about anything right now, he just wanted to eat his sandwich and go to bed. But it seemed important so he figured he’d survive a little longer.

You studied your sock-clad feet closely, “I know we’re both really busy and it’s hard to find time for certain things like time with each other, time to study, or cleaning. But it’s something we have to find time for, y’know?”

Percy hummed, “I can ask off on Saturday if you want? We can spend the day together, we haven’t had a whole day in a while.”

You gave a small smile because while that is a concern, that’s not what you were talking about. You won’t say no though. You stole a glance at him, “I have missed being with you, I guess.”

“You guess?” Percy said a little louder, poking your stomach teasingly, “What’s that supposed to mean?”

You chuckled, swatting his hand away, “Be quiet! Ronnie will be at our door in a second, you know that.” Just do it, he’s in a good mood! “I was actually talking about the cleaning…”

At that, Percy took a look around. The dishes weren’t overflowing and the laundry wasn’t piling up, it didn’t look like something needed to be addressed. He finished the last of his sandwich, “Okay? What needs to be done?”

“Well between the two of us there is hardly any time to do anything else right? Well, it feels like I’m the only one taking care of the place-”

“But I do take care of the place,” He interrupted, “I pay the bills and I pick up after myself so-”

“But you don’t.” You spoke exasperated, “You don’t always pick up after yourself. Look, you left the bread and the PB&J out!” A fight isn’t what you wanted so you tried to approach it a different way. You took a deep breath, “...I understand you’re busy, I am too. I just want you to make a conscious effort to put things away where they belong.”

He scoffed, a disbelieving smile on his face, “I’m not a kid anymore, Y/n. I know how to clean up after myself, my mom made sure of that.”

“Then why don’t you? You used to be really good about helping me out–”

“I’m exhausted Y/n, what do you want me to do?!” 

“Fucking help me, that’s what!”

It went quiet, staring the other down and wondering who would back down first. It was silly honestly, but you were tired of picking up the slack. The work in the apartment used to be equal but lately its looking a lot like you do 88% and Percy does 12%.

You relented, huffing and shaking your head, “Okay then.” You turned on your heel, going over to the front door and putting your shoes on along with a jacket. You needed to calm down, a little fresh air to maybe come up with a different way of approaching this. 

The convenience store across the road might still be open. You could grab one of those bottled iced coffees for tomorrow morning, maybe a small snack too. Hopefully the small errand would be long enough for you to think of another approach. Maybe one where Percy was less of an ass, or less tired, whichever one really.

Percy followed you around to the door, his crossed arms dropping to his sides when he noticed what you were doing. He furrowed his brows, “Where are you going? It’s past midnight.”

“I’m well aware of the time, Perseus.” You hissed, “I’m going out to grab a few things.”

He shook his head, his black hair still wet from the shower, “You can wait until morning for that, come on!” he spoke lowly as he approached you, “let’s just get some rest...”

You pulled from his reach and twisted the door knob open, walking out without another word. You closed it behind you and padded over to the stairs, hopping down the unlit steps like you normally did. 

Unluckily, your foot narrowly missed the next step and without the light to see where you could potentially catch yourself, you fell. Yep, you hit every step on the way down. If Ronnie hadn’t heard the argument you just had, he had to have heard your swears as your body fumbled down to the 1st floor.

Percy flung the door open, the light from your apartment lighting up the dark stairwell. His footsteps thundered down the stairs and there he sat in front of you, words flying out of his mouth so fast that you didn’t even know what he was saying. The fall caught you so off guard that you weren’t sure what was happening right now.

Ronnie threw his door open, profanities slipping out his mouth at the noise, “And this is why I never rent to young couples!” He shouted, but the threat of his words were tame without his dentures to help him spit it out. He turned his head to the bottom of the stairs where Percy leaned over your confused figure, fumbling over his words and oblivious to Ronnie.

“Well shit...” Ronnie muttered, backing back into his apartment quietly.

You snapped out of your daze, noticing how much your ankle actually hurt. Okay you’ve definitely dealt with worse, but the pain was still annoying. You started to push yourself off the steps and into a standing position, using the railing to steady yourself on your good foot.

Percy’s hands slid up your body, settling on your waist and attempting to help you back up the stairs. He kept his mouth shut on the way into the apartment, knowing that you’re probably even more irritated now.

Once you were sat comfortably on the couch, he rushed off to grab a bag of frozen peas to put on your ankle to stop the swelling. You did appreciate the thought, but you were not dealing with this any longer than you had to.

“Percy, there’s some ambrosia in my dresser, bottom drawer on the left.” 

He blinked and wandered off to the bedroom, shuffling through your stuff before muttering, “It’s not even in here.” He spent a couple of more minutes looking around for the Ziploc bag you had, but clearly wasn’t really looking.

You hauled yourself off the couch, chuckling and shaking your head at his antics. Hobbling into the room you saw that he was looking in the night stand, not the dresser like you told him to. No wonder he couldn’t find it. 

“Kelp head, I said the dresser not the night stand.” You laughed, limping over to the dresser and lcoating the bits of ambrosia. Percy was by your side in an instant, leading you back towards the bed and helping you situate yourself there comfortably. You said nothing as you opened the bag and nibbled on one of the pieces, a warm feeling washing over you.

You could feel the pain in your ankle easing off slowly and hopefully it would only be a little sore by morning. Percy took the bag from your hands and set it aside wordlessly, he muttered something about closing the front door before leaving the room.

You could tell he felt awkward about what just happened and he probably felt a little guilty about the argument you just had, even if it wasn’t all that serious. The two of you have had worse fights about worse things, but this is the first time in a while. It was bound to happen.

He came back in right as you shifted under the blankets, turning the light off and slipping underneath with you. He didn’t snuggle up to you right away, waiting to see if you were still pissed at him, but you didn’t make a move to kick him out the bed.

“I’m sorry for being such a dick, Y/n.” He whispered, “I didn’t know how much it bothered you and I’ll try to clean more often. I swear.” 

Nothing was said, for a moment, Percy thought you’d fallen asleep, but you turned slowly to face him, eyes scanning his face in the dim light from the window. You brought a hand up to his face and traced his jawline gently, “That’s all I wanted you to do, stupid.”

He huffed and inched closer to nuzzle your nose with his, “And all it took was a sprained ankle for me to figure that out.”

You laughed and knocked your forehead against his, “It’s my fault for being so deadset on grabbing coffee for tomorrow morning. I should’ve just gone to bed.”

“Do you want coffee now? I can go grab it–”

“No, I’m not getting up tomorrow. Go to sleep, fish brain.”

[spiiderwiick]

Yet Another Bad Idea

For a moment they had thought that was it. That was the end of little Wick the spider. The claws and teeth were too close, they wouldn’t be able to outrun them and knew that trying to run now would just set off whatever predatory instincts were leading the creature. Their voice caught in their throat, they wanted to yell for help, call Benrey. He could protect them, he always protected them when they needed it. All they could do was cower, squeeze their eyes shut, and maybe hope that they came out of this only missing a limb or two instead of just dead.

The growling cut off abruptly and Wick flinched, anticipating something crunching through their carapace. Much like the last time they’d found themselves in front of an angry monster, nothing came of it.

Instead as they lowered their arms and slowly opened their eyes, they found the strange creature turning tail to run back into the woods. In the dark of the night they couldn’t make out much behind them. Something dark. And close. They could see the light of the full moon glinting off many white somethings. Teeth. They realized, a new lump of dread growing in their stomach. Teeth that were nearly wrapped around them as if poised to crunch into a tasty spider snack.

Wick lurched forward, stumbling away from the horrifying wall of teeth. In the blurry cover of night with their flashlight on the ground, they couldn’t make out what they belonged to, but they knew. Of course they knew.

As they scrabbled to pick up their flashlight without tearing their eyes away from the shape in front of them, it stepped forward. The teeth gnashed together before disappearing with an uncomfortably wet sound as she returned to a more normal form just in time for them to find their flashlight. Some part of them was glad they couldn’t see whatever Patches had turned herself into in its full, unsettling glory, “Hoohoo~ Aren’t you lucky I’ve been coming out to play every night~?”

Their shaky hand shined the flashlight up at her, causing her pupil to shrink to a slit and a frown to spread across her face as she shielded her face with a clawed hand, “Don’t your silly little rules classes teach you not to shine lights in people’s faces?”

Wick found themselves speechless. Had she just.. Saved them? All they could do was stare up at her, dumbfounded.

It wasn’t quite the reaction Patches had expected, but maybe the little arachnid was in shock, “I don’t know why you thought pestering some feral monster on the full moon was a good idea, you moron.”

Wick just nodded. Yeah. You know what? They were a moron. They did a very foolish, very dumb thing, and they nearly paid the ultimate price for it.

Still no reaction. A disappointment. Patches hummed faintly before closing the distance to roughly heave Wick up off the ground and back onto their feet. She turned to start walking away, “Better get a move on before it decides to come back.”

“w-wait..” Finally, they piped up, “you.. you saved me?”

Patches stopped, though not abruptly, she’d expected this question, “No. I scared it off. Scaring people in this woods is what I’ve been doing this whole time.”

Okay so she was still in denial, they concluded, “... thank you.” They trailed off for a moment. Patches had been here most nights, hadn’t she? Nobody had raised any complaints though, and nobody had gotten hurt. Had she been behaving for once in her life? Wick managed to let out a wheezy little laugh, “i thought you didn’t like all our fakey fake scares. they weren’t real enough for you.”

“I’m real.” The smile in her voice was apparent, even with her back turned, “And oh when someone recognizes me, or realizes I’m not some dollar store prop hung from a tree? That’s the fun part.”

Normally they might have taken offense at the dollar store prop comment, the stuff at their haunt was some damn good quality stuff. Currently it wasn’t worth their energy to argue that point. Besides, they had yet another bad idea brewing in their head, “...... so you do like the haunt. you just.. think you can do it better.”

“I can do it better, but go on.”

Wick shook their head faintly, “you said it was benrey’s idea.. you coming to bother us each night.”

“You’d hardly even know I was here had I not been bragging about it online.” It seemed she would not let this drop without arguing every one of their points, “And yes, he suggested it.”

“... well. what if.” This was a bad idea. This was a really, really bad idea, “you.... joined.. officially?”

In the dark it was difficult to notice, but their sharp eyes managed to catch a flick of the ears at their suggestion. They’d caught her interest.

“Officially.” Finally, she turned to face them again, eye narrowed, “You want me in your silly little show?”

Patches was incapable of saying anything without negging.

“i mean.. you’d have to follow the rules. no touching people, no hurting them, no killing.” They’re not sure they have it in them to do a Patches version of the rules class right this second, but, “could probably put you in a set benrey could keep an eye on you in. make sure you behave... but. it kinda sounds like.. you have been already.” They were quite sure she’d broken a bunch of rules, but the bar was pretty low when it came to murder clowns.

Hm. Her head tilted slightly at that, so they had noticed after all.

“i.. gotta go check back in. and.. let everyone know what happened. i don’t know what the fuck that thing is but-”

“Weremoth.”

“what.”

“It’s a weremoth. Duh.”

Wick stared up at Patches incredulously. She seemed completely nonchalant, as if this was something that was supposed to be common knowledge, “okay how much fuckin’ monsters and magic shit is real in this world and how much of it do you already know about?”

“A lot.” Cheeky clown hours were now, apparently.

Wick quickly decided this was a conversation they wanted to try and pin Patches down for, but not out here in the middle of the dark woods at nearly midnight. They glanced up the dark and empty trail. There was no trace of blue glow to indicate the creature was still around and yet they suddenly didn’t feel quite as comfortable alone in the dark anymore. In fact, they felt so uncomfortable that the literal murder clown accompanying them sounded better than going it alone, “..right. okay. why don’t you come back to the lodge with me?”

Patches shrugged but followed along behind them. Wick had never been more thankful for the eyes in the back of their head. They didn’t trust her not to try anything, even though she didn’t. The entire walk back to the lodge she was quiet and just trotted along behind them.

----------------------------------------------------------------

Wick had never been so relieved to step through the threshold of the lodge and into the light. Nearly all the volunteers had gone home by now, there were just a few board members and Benrey left, waiting to make sure Wick made it back safe. Benrey ran over to them before stalling a bit, looking over at the doorway.

Patches had stopped just outside the threshold of the door, waiting for the inevitable reaction to finally revealing herself.

Nyx, a wide-eyed black and red moth, was the first to react, “That’s- Fucking clown.” Very astute. He jumped up from his seat as though ready to throw down right then and there.

“i know- i brought her back here.” Wick admitted sheepishly.

Benrey gave Wick a quizzical look for that. Bro? What doing? Clown times? Why bring feral clown into house?

A very tall trilobite beetle stepped forward, “Wick honey... Are you alright? She didn’t do anything to you, did she?”

“no, calla, i’m fine- i. fuck. she saved my ass.” They were sure Patches wouldn’t appreciate being accused of saving them, but they figured it would be the fastest way to get everyone else more on board with their harebrained idea.

“She what.” Nyx had his eyes narrowed, everyone else remained in stunned silence.

A silence that Patches decided to fill. She ducked her head through the doorway to enter the lodge before straightening back up to her full height, the only one in the room who could match her was Calla, “Your idiotic little friend thought they could placate a feral monster with a candy bar. I happened to be in the area and I’m a bigger, scarier monster. That’s all.”

She was doing herself no favors. The entire room save for Benrey and Wick tensed as she stepped into the building. The haunt crew had known about her since last year, they’d seen her on the cameras and kept a close eye out after Wick had reported in about her. Wick had also kept them filled in on how dangerous she was, so seeing her waltz into the safety of the lodge, seeing her for the first time in person, that was something entirely new.

“she’s. apparently been lurking around the show again this year-”

“Then she’s been doing a damn good job avoiding the cameras.” Nyx frowned.

Patches brightened at that, “Thank you, I try~”

Wick grimaced faintly at that additional strike against the idea they have been trying to propose, “and i was thinkiiiiing.... since she’s beennn... “good”...” They made heavy airquotes around that word with all six arms, “that maybe... she’d be... areallygoodadditionalsurprisescareonhalloweennight.” The words tumbled out quickly, before they could get interrupted again or stop themselves from finishing their bad idea. It sounded bad, they knew it sounded bad and that they were forgetting something.

“with supervision.” They added hastily.

Well. If the room was stunned into silence before, it was nothing compared to now. Even Nyx didn’t have any deadpan comments to add. Wick could feel all the eyes in the room boring into them.

Calla was the first to break the silence, “Hon... If she’s as dangerous as you say, who exactly would be able to step in if she did do anything? And why would we take that risk?”

“Oh yo that’s me.” Benrey piped up. While he had been nervous about haunt stuff, he was an expert in handling this clown. Clown wrangler Benrey.

Wick nodded in agreement, “i kinda figured he’d handle things. but..” They  glanced up at Patches, who loomed silently above them. Wick could feel her dislike of being supervised by Benrey. It radiated from her, “if she plays by the rules, he won’t have to do anything.”

“Does she even want to?” Another spoke up, this one a luna moth, “And who exactly is giving her the rules class? Cause it sure as hell isn’t me.”

“no- i mean yes she does, and no you don’t have to.. i’ll do it.” Wick could feel themselves wilting the more they wrapped themselves up in this foolish idea.

“Do I though?” Patches added unhelpfully. Though it was true, she had never confirmed nor denied wanting to involve herself.

Benrey found himself about to open his mouth, but glanced over to Wick first and stopped himself. Maybe they needed to say something first.

Wick felt the stress and frustration growing, part of them wanted to melt into the floor away from all the scrutinizing stares, the other part of them wanted to yell at the clown. For the second time this month, the latter won out, “could you stop being a cagey bitch for two fucking seconds and give me a straight answer!!! you’ve been hanging out here for two years now! of course you want to fucking  do scary shit in the show! you always say you can do better than we can and how much you hate all our fake shit! why don’t you fucking prove it! scare people without hurting them! without touching them! do it somewhere we can see! prove us wrong! show us how great at being scary you are! benrey’s already doing cool monster shit with us, why don’t you upstage him! show us you’re the scariest fucker in the park!!!”

Patches hadn’t expected them to blow up at her that quickly, the other monster encounter must have left their nerves more frazzled than she thought. An amused expression settled onto her face, “Alright... Maybe I can play nice for one night.”

“Bro! Nice clowns aren’t scary. You gotta be mean! But like.. Mean lite! Little nasty clown! As a treat!”

A look of mild irritation crossed Patches’ face at Benrey’s feedback, but the amusement returned quickly, “Of course.. You’re right. How silly of me.”

“Nooooooouh… not silly! Scary! How you gonna upstage me if you can’t get this right, yo?” This disagreement would continue for some time if left unchecked...

Nobody in the room looked thrilled by this idea, least of all Wick. They still fumed, though it had waned some after they finally got the damn clown to agree to something. They didn’t trust her to keep her word, of course, but that’s what all-seeing eldritch gods are for, right?