#But it does come across as. A very isolationist way of thinking.

[sskk-manifesto]

(´･ᴗ･ ` )

[icebrooding]

I need more brain-to-words ability to convey this better but. Trahearne's aversion to his Hunt and actively trying to hide from it and postpone it due to fear of failure and that being connected to his position as the first of the Firstborn and seeing a reflection of how he took his role as the eldest.

He clarifies that it is an instinct for a creature to 'defend its young' (paraphrased), using this in clear reference to the sylvari as a whole, on how to care for the newly awakened.

And, as the oldest sylvari, to him this could mean the other firstborn too. Despite his best efforts, I think there is a lot of 'failure' of this principle regarding his interactions with the other sylvari in their youth.

Riannoc. The first three dead secondborn. Malomedies. The 20-something dead secondborn. It's entirely possible that, as the oldest, he may have seen them all as his responsibility. And while he says that something may not always be successful in protecting their young, we only really see instances in the sylvari youth where things went very, very wrong.

It would be one thing to make mistakes at times, but wouldn't this just come across to him as constant failure? Even if things were outside of his hands to do anything about.

He seemed to be around the Grove more consistently in his youth, but this obviously changed at some point to where he became 'that weird semi-isolationist sylvari who spends all his time in long-dead lands'.

Personally, I think the incident with the secondborn was the final straw before he started leaving for long stretches of time, since we don't really see the aftermath. If this was his way of perception, what do you think exactly would happen to him, mentally, if due to his age/position he sees himself as the one who should be keeping the other sylvari safe, but so many have died or been maimed in horrifying ways, and he hasn't been able to do a single thing to avert it? (This coming not long after what happened to Malomedies does not help, and it's possible that Cadeyrn could have exacerbated it, knowing how volatile he was the last time.)

I would think that maybe he turned to treating things at home the same way he would treat his own Hunt; trying to run and hide from it. He had the perfect excuse to leave the Grove behind and not have to think about having to take care of the other sylvari, and thus possibly fail them. He needed to distance himself as the only way to cope with the expectations he's put upon himself. To cope with not living up to basic instinct.

But it's something of a double edged sword; something he does to protect himself because he simply does not know how to otherwise, but his time away alienates himself from his home and family to the point he feels 'distant' more and more each time he comes back.

A lot of Trahearne's character is kind of about this person who manages to form many bonds with people, yet remains lonely. Someone who is looked up to and confided in, but has none to confide in himself. Someone who is a natural leader, but has nobody to guide him. Someone who is accomplished, but too scared to achieve what he wants.

(I mean, doesn't it say something when his most important life decisions were not of his own choice but rather things he was set up for by forces outside his control or through other people's suggestion?)

Trahearne eventually is able to overcome his fears regarding his Hunt, or at least is able to confront them, when the Commander comes into his life and becomes one of the few if not the only person he can look to the same way everyone else looks to him. By the end of the Personal Story, he is something of a changed man.

And I think, in some way, HoT could also be about him coming to face and cope with his other fear, regarding the sylvari and who he was to the rest of them.

At least, this is how I personally can read his character, and its a reading I like, since I really wanted to know more of what life was really like from his side, one full of expectation and responsibility and pressure.

I've re-written this exact thing several times now, because I just struggle to fully get across the idea I have here, but I figured I might as well throw it to the wind. and hopefully not get bullied for 'being too analytical on stuff that doesn't matter' again cri

[the-raging-tempest]

Fuck it rambling.

I am really enjoying (in a like tragic cathartic way) fleshing out the past love interests. Like for example.

Oria being a faithful servant of Calistria manifests as getting revenge for their mother against the unjust rule of Cheliax. Galt being in the tail end of the Red Revolution… when Zrise shows up. They are in full political anarchy. Killing nobles and senators in the streets as entertainment. Oria and their family eagerly sharing information they gain working as courtesans to the Grey Gardeners. Galt’s political executioners. So committed to the cause that even made guillotines that take the soul so Hell can’t even get that win.

They fundamentally see Zrise as an outsider. Forever. Yes he’s a bastard, but he’s a noble. A man who directly benefits from being part of the ruling class. Even though he’s not a noble in Galt. He’s basically a nobody there. But his family is from Kyonin. And they are powerful there. Enough that he’s treated as ‘untouchable’ in the church. Kyonin being a neighboring country that keeps all refugees out of their boarders. Isolationist. Yes, Zrise has no control let alone any idea about most of that. But it colors their interactions with him.

Oria and Relik in some ways just see a vulnerable naive noble kid and think ‘let’s fuck with him’ and that’s how it starts. Like when a popular kid takes a nerd as a friend but it’s mostly to bully them and make fun of them. Take advantage of them. Yes, they get to know him and start to feel sympathy for him. But that only makes them angry. Complicates the simple answers they have.

You can also see why Zrise would think he’s ‘saving’ Oria by offering to get them out of Galt. Not realizing that the reason they fight what they see as Cheliaxian influence in their home is because they want to. It’s their purpose. They care deeply about their home. They view it as insulting that he can just ‘leave’ whatever situation he finds unpleasant. Using his family and their money. Why they would feel he doesn’t actually even ‘love’ them because if he did, he’d understand this. Like Relik does.

Zrise’s version of love being that he wants to protect. Make someone safe. But it very much comes across as possessive and controlling instead. Growing up reading those same books as Lariel he always hoped in some way he could be some kind of knight in shining armor. Only to be so so so wrong.

This is also where Zrise gets is hatred of nobles. It’s like he can’t unsee it after Galt. Going back to Mendev and seeing his family host grand parties and buy stupid expensive things he just feels bitter. So yes, he uses his nobility and their connections, and their money, to the best of his abilities. Knowing full well it tastes awful. Thinking it’s a bitter pill he must swallow because what else does he have?

If he’s hated for being a noble, and he’s hated for being a bastard, and he’s hated for being undead, and he’s hated for being half-elven, and he’s hated for being Calsitrian, he’s hated for being an Inquisitor… well then fuck it! He might as well embrace it and use it. If no one will like him, then he’ll just stop trying to be likable…

[dragonsfell]

[ INBOX / accepting ] ⸻ @mccnrxse sent in ⸻ “ I am the problem here and I am fully aware, but I made the decision to inflict me on everyone else. ” [ to - up to you; from - Gale ]

Their gaze shifts from the gathering folk around the campfire, back toward the wizard and regards him for a moment. Green and purples eyes looking on, taking in the way his shoulders holds a weight that seemed unbearable; but they, like everyone over by the fire, knew where the weight was truly coming from.

Cora'kesh couldn't imagine that of a goddess with a face and form; the Nine and Six and One were in everything, but there were no avatars or chosen, no material forms. The Gods never spoke, but existed in everything but to hold on higher than an other. Aureon may be with every magewright when he or she opens a book, but that was equally as much as Onatar was in every clink of an artificer's hammer. One may be louder to you than another, but if you prayed, you prayed to all of them but you bore no punishment if you didn't believe. The Gods would not scorn you for turning away. To give a god a face, for goddesses to have faces that seemed almost wrong; but Cora'kesh wouldn't say.

They'd hold back their own judgements, for Khorvaire did not understand the Path of Light for which they walked as it was. Cora'kesh does not look on with pity, or tries not to and they remain silent a moment further. Mull over what Gale says, with the weight that he carries and new knowledge. Turns the words until they find ones that could be offered as insight. Enlightenment was a life long venture, even if they had been named as yannahilath among their community. Priest or lightspeaker among their community to offer guidance.

❝ I speak not for knowing the weight of destruction in my chest, but you are still living and breathing, are you not? ❞ It may be limited time, but they had a point here to be made. It's a very druidic approach, but druidism has been their first connection to all things. ❝ You own your condition, that is the first step; but you cannot be a creature of solitude, Gale, most aren't by birth. ❞ To say that he inflicts himself others is statement that comes with pain, of which they wouldn't probe to far into but both their soul and spirit were healers. Physical and spiritual.

❝ You are not an infliction upon the world, your punishment nestled in your chest may be, but we know this is what you carry, it is, of our own choosing, to remain and you can't take that from us; no one can carry our burdens of own making; I bear mine, you bear yours but that does not mean we need to make ourselves isolationists; you have those willing to walk with you. If one such would offer a hand ⸻ ❞ They hold out their hand toward Gale to make their point come across.

In all things, they hope to give Gale a moment of respite, to shed some light onto his shoulders. Different ways to think. It's not to cast judgement, or make small that he holds barely bound catastrophe, that was bad but ever a follower of the light; that didn't cast him out from compassion or redemption. ❝ You are not inflicting me for taking it. ❞

[angel-milano]

November 20 – Personality Playlist

♏It's Scorpio Season, Babey🦂

Scorpio Personality Traits: Passionate (Read: controlling), Persistent (Read: obsessive), Strategic (Read: Secretive), Loyal (Read: vengeful), Fearlessly curious (Read: morbid) [x]

Chandelier by Sia

I'm gonna swing from the chandelier From the chandelier I'm gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist Like it doesn't exist

Although equally as destructive, Angel can be a passionate person, going way too hard in what she does. This often is seen in the way she parties, both to have fun but also trying to numb herself to everything.

2. Bug Like an Angel by Mitski

There's a bug like an angel stuck to the bottom Of my glass, with a little bit left As I got older, I learned I'm a drinker Sometimes, a drink feels like family

Angel has had multiple "families" throughout her life, all of which have fallen apart for one reason or another. It's caused her to be isolationist, to pull back into her herself, and use unhealthy coping mechanisms. Despite the loneliness is causes her, she is controlling of her own narrative.

3. Bad Girls by Tennis

The truth you know I'll never find I'll never have any peace of mind It's true I know I'll never find I'll never have any peace of mind

Angel sees herself as a bad person incapable of ever being good, but she continues nevertheless. She is persistent in her survival, as well as her newfound goals of unraveling the mysteries of her life.

4. Gods & Monsters by Lana Del Ray

In the land of Gods and Monsters I was an angel living in the garden of evil Screwed up, scared, doing anything that I needed Shining like a fiery beacon

Over the course of finding out the truth about her family and heritage, Angel has become obsessive over how her life was fucked from the start and how it can't be fixed. She's reckless both in how she copes and also her pursuit of her father.

5. All Men Are Pigs by The Studio Killers

You are one of them Everything but femme I won't be fooled again You've got the same kind of specs As the sex of men

Angel very much plays into gender stereotyping when it comes to the ways she interacts around others, especially men. Whether it be playing along with terrible pick-up lines or pretending to be interested where she isn't. On the flip side, she'll be the first to degrade men with other women. No matter who she is with, she is strategic in all of her interactions.

6. Normal Girl by SZA

Wish I was the type of girl that you take over to mama The type of girl, I know my daddy, he'd be proud of (Yeah) Be proud of (Yeah) Be proud of, be proud, you know, you know

In many ways, Angel wishes she was normal--that she had a normal life and could form normal relationships. But due to everything that's happened, she doesn't allow herself to be, and all of her connections tend to fall apart. She is both secretive about herself and her history, but something always comes out that ruins it all.

7. Love Like You by Rebecca Sugar

I always thought I might be bad Now I'm sure that it's true 'Cause I think you're so good And I'm nothing like you

Despite all of this, Angel does want that connection and will pursue it in spite of herself. She will go into a relationship knowing that it won't work out, but is so desperate that she'll pursue it anyway, just for the moment of reprieve. During those times, always with people who she sees as better than herself, she is loyal. Until she's gone.

8. Howl by Florence and the Machine

If you could only see the beast you've made of me I held it in but now it seems you've set it running free The saints can't help me now, the ropes have been unbound I hunt for you with bloodied feet across the hallowed ground

Angel's father was a werewolf, careless and reckless in his endeavors, thus creating a child doomed to a cursed and unhappy life. Deciding to lean into it, Angel now relishes in the vengeful nature of the wolf, looking to hunt down the man who made her what she is.

9. Sinful by Marina and the Diamonds

You kicked me out and hung a rope down from the roof The Christians came out, they watched me tie my noose I spoke a silent prayer, they began crying They knew that I'd applied to hell, they knew I got in

Angel never had much of a moral compass growing up. She's fearlessly curious and will pursue the things she wants, whether or not it's good for her or others. She doesn't particularly care what others thinks and in fact enjoys offending people.

10. Oblivion by Grimes

You know it's good to be tough like me But I will wait forever I need someone else To look into my eyes and tell me "Girl, you know you've got to watch your health"

Having spent so much time on the streets and by herself, Angel has gotten to see the best, but also worse sides of people. While she has been able to hold her own and protect herself, it's given her a cynical view of humanity and how to live life. She's got a rather morbid outlook that shines through.

[scarasweetheart]

pls share ur xiao self ship hcs he actually told me hes in love w u too

character(s): stares. blinks. me. and xiao.

genre: sfw (themes of fluff; light angst)

a/n: doing sth new today ig ! uhm. self-ship hcs below the cut !!

         ↬ oh my oh my ok so

         ↬ he's just like me fr. which. which doesn't seem like it'd be good for a relationship by any metric 💀💀💀 BUT BUT hear me out, i think it'd cancel out like pemdas LMFAO

         ↬ yeah we're both emotionally unavailable and isolate ourselves but together we're emotionally compatible and isolated together

         ↬ let's rewind a lil tho, it absolutely took A While to get anywhere relationship-wise w him 🚶 both platonic and romantic, but i'm so insanely stubborn and persistent and obsessive until i get my way so yk there was no way he was ab to get rid of me 😭💀💀

         ↬ now. to address the mutual emotional unavailability. or like. our mutual "give me space" attitudes or whateva 🔥🔥

         ↬ since we r both like. not suffocating !!!! and understand when the other needs space that does Wonders for the relationship

         ↬ it is. it is also, unfortunately, a gateway for mis/lack of communication :// xiao would be aware of any problems in the relationship, but unless they affect him immediately and personally, he just. won't bring it up — which means i'm gon have to do that and. oh lord 💀

         ↬ speaking of communication, xiao is. yikes. Very straight to the point and Blunt — even moreso than i am 😟😟 and its v easy for him to come across as cold and/or uncaring even if thats not the case. and i do think sometimes it would sting (maybe more than) a lil bc i'll have my moments of Sensitivity but !!!!!!! i can see myself exerting a great deal of patience w him :( lord knows he needs it 😭

         ↬ derailing for a sec; even further in the relationship, i do think xiao is still somewhat emotionally isolated ???? bc of his karmic debt and his refusal to accept any sympathy or help :(( which. i understand 💀 but also :/ once again i would be as patient as i could but 🤨🤨 i'm gonna help him w this whether he likes it or not it's unavoidable [lovingly]

                 ↬ in a gentle way tho !!!! gentle but stupidly fucking persistent. but i also think this is where. Many problems would occur. bc xiao is stupidly stubborn and has such– he's actually horribly self-deprecating. :(( n also a lil emo he would try to push me away bc "he doesn't want me to get hurt" as if i don't know what i signed up for 🙄 he can isolate and devalue himself all he wants but i'm not going anywhere and i'm not going to stop trying to help

         ↬ so anyway, fast forward to the more domestic(?) sides of the relationship, i'm gonna touch on both our love languages and how they intertwine rq

         ↬ i think xiao's love languages are quality time, acts of service, and physical touch !!!!

         ↬ quality time for an assortment of reaons: his isolationist tendencies, he's so old and has seen so much come and go and xiao is very aware of how fleeting human life is, and now that i am someone he holds near and dear to his heart, whether he likes it or not, i think he'd like to capitalize on his time w me

         ↬ we don't even have to be doing anything — or even talking; just one another's company is more than is enough <3 sometimes u will not hear from either of us for days at a time bc we are just simply hiding away from the rest of the world (together more often than not, but not always)

         ↬ acts of service bc words r not xiao's strong suit 💀💀💀 by any degree 😭 but he's doing his best and i appreciate that :(( he's just not very good at expressing himself or his feelings overall (this has lead to a handful of slightly damaging Miscommunications but thankfully im Very intuitive and do, in fact, know what's wrong)

         ↬ but anyway when i say acts of service is one of xiao's love languages, i do NOT mean cooking and cleaning 🧏 i mean like. its more akin to "the littler things" yk what i mean ????? like maybe he'd do lil tasks for me here n there throughout the day (whenever he can) or maybe run an errand or two if it's important 🙏🙏

         ↬ and lastly physical touch !! now. now just hear me out. xiao is so insanely touch starved it's literally not even funny i am Genuinely worried for him 😭😭😭 and so he was 100% touch repulsed at the start of our relationship, but that's ok !!!!! i am a very patient man when i want to be and have no problems w waiting for him to warm up to touch

         ↬ now. once xiao is ok w physical touch i think he becomes so physically clingy ????? bc he's like 2000 years old and was . Was Fighting for years and years on end this man has never felt a loving touch in his life (sobbing rn fr)

         ↬ by physically clingy i do not necessarily mean cuddly, i mean he is just. always by my side as often as he can be. i don't think he'd take the initiative to like . actually touch me ?????? (not for a while anyway) bc he's scared of messing up or doing sth wrong and would just straight up die [Metaphorical] if he were to ever hurt me — accident or not (this def ties in w his past)

         ↬ but that's not to say he cant be cuddly !!! xiao very much enjoys cuddling but ???????? one, he doesn't even know what its called tbh (he's so out of touch w mortals but that's ok im here to help) and two, he doesn't know how to ask to cuddle either 😭😭😭❓❓❓❓ poor thing :(( probably comes up from behind n wraps his arms around my waist n puts his head on my shoulder 🧐🧐 either that or he'll grab my wrist n like ??? pull me against his chest ?? or sth to that degree anyway 🚶 but obvi i'll take the hint n offer to cuddle w him <3

                 ↬ OOOOO ALSO he absolutely fucking melts whenever i play w his hair :( it's just so. its it it its so. soft. its so simple but so sweet :((

         ↬ now its time for my love languages !!!!! :0

         ↬ so. my love languages definitely mirror those of my partners 💀🙇 but my most consistent ones are acts of service (it's that goddamn virgo venus) and physical touch !!

         ↬ not only is it convenient, but i do think it works in our favor that our love languages are the same :)

         ↬ now, my acts of service. anything u need, anything at all, i am at your service 🧎🙏🏃 when i truly love someone theres hardly a thing i wouldn't do for them, and with how down bad i am for xiao ? YEESH (god please let me take care of him please please please ple)

         ↬ i'd learn to make almond tofu SO FAST 😭😭😭😭😭 n i'd do anything n everything i could to help him in anyway possible :((

         ↬ physical touch in my case. blushes and giggles. while i do not normally entertain others touching me, it's different w xiao (or in any close-knit relationship but 🚶)

                 ↬ i'd very much enjoy napping w him (RAINY DAY NAPS PLEASE GOD) or just sitting next to him or on his lap yk <3

         ↬ i think kisses would tie in w this too ?????? shakes and cries. i would just. i would give him so many kisses :((( a gentle kiss to his forehead, on each of his checks, the tip of his nose, his neck, shoulders, everywhere :(( AND HES SO PRETTY TOO HOW COULD I NOT SMOTHER HIM IN KISSES ,'?"!,:;!,"?",???:,??!?;,

         ↬ and as for quality time, i think this one is v self explanatory. me and my lil addictive personality. uh oh. 😊 ab to get addicted to his presence fr 🤒🤒 just. just spending any sort of time w him. it doesnt matter what we're doing or where we are so long as i'm w xiao :(

         ↬ as much as i'd like to pretend i'm not codependent. i very much am. physically anyway 🧏🚶 we dont even have to talk or interact or anything — which is nice bc yk we both understand the need for Emotional space, so this works out very well i'd say. if we r in our lil isolatory episodes, then there is a sharp decrease in our actual physical interactions ???? rather we'll like sit on opposite sides of the room, not even rlly talking, and jus doing whatever but its comforting knowing that we're like not Alone yk

         ↬ " uhhhh might add more later today but its 3am and im tired so this is it for now " maybe i will write more one day

[sockablock]

When Essek's old alter ego is suddenly asked by Da'leth to work at Soltryce Academy, nine semi-retired adventurers are thrust back into a web of danger, intrigue, and wizardly shenanigans. (Surprise, surprise! I’m back with another Shadowgast WIP)

Chapter 1: The Worst-Case Scenario

Caleb watched Essek hover back and forth like a miniature, panicked storm cloud.

“This is ridiculous! It must be some kind of joke. We haven't had any contact for years, and now he expects me to believe him? What is he playing at?”

“Breathe, Essek, breathe. You will not solve this mystery by wearing a hole in—above—the carpet.”

“What?” Essek looked down, then stopped floating. “Oh. My apologies. I’m a bit…well, you know.”

“I would be too.” There was urging in Caleb’s voice. “Take a seat, Schatz. Let me see the letter.”

Essek obliged, handing over a crumpled scroll right before collapsing heavily into his chair. The fire of a cold late-autumn evening cast their den in gold and orange light.

“Does he explain himself?” Caleb turned the scroll the right way around. “Does he say why?”

“Has Da’leth ever done that?” Essek snorted. “All he wrote was that I—rather, that Thain, had been selected. And I only have two days to respond.”

Caleb waved his hand, and a glowing orb appeared. He brought it closer to the parchment. “May I?”

“Please.”

“To the esteemed Lord Dezran Thain of Nicodranas—good grief. He really isn’t subtle.”

“Tell me about it,” Essek said.

“Perhaps,” Caleb continued, “you are aware of the ongoing investigations into the Cerberus Assembly. If so, then perhaps you have also heard that Archmage Tversky and Archmage Margolin will be leaving our ranks by the end of the week—ah yes, Beau was quite proud of that.”

“She should be,” Essek said miserably. “It’s about time. Read the next part.”

“And so it falls on the surviving members of our organization to fill these vacant roles. We believe, for the safety and stability of our country, that the next Archmages of Conscription and Dysology should come from within the Empire; however, it has been brought to our attention that adding a Nicodranian mage to our ranks could be quite valuable. Such an alliance would strengthen our ties to the Menagerie Coast, as well as assuage any concerns that the Empire is isolationist or inflexible. Therefore, as we have been friends for some time—really?”

Essek made a face. “I would not have called him my ‘friend’ in any form, but we have known each other for a few decades. Unfortunately.”

“Unfortunately,” Caleb commiserated. He smoothed out the letter and found his place again. “—I wished to have the pleasure of informing you that on behalf of the Cerberus Assembly, you, Lord Dezran Thain of Nicodranas, have been extended the honor of replacing Archmage Margolin in his secondary capacity—as the distinguished and peerless Headmaster of the Soltryce Academy. Oh. My gods.”

Essek groaned. He had his head buried in his hands.

“You Identified this already?” Caleb managed eventually.

Essek nodded. “I wish I hadn’t.”

Caleb continued to stare at the letters. The fluid, curving script seemed to blur all together. “That’s…gods,” he said again.

“Agreed.”

“I…can’t imagine how you’re feeling right now.”

Essek snorted. “Actually, if anyone could, it would be you.” Then something occurred to him. Suddenly, the hearth shone an odd color in his eyes. “This was delivered to our home. To this house, in Rexxentrum. Yours. That…bastard.”

Caleb was quick to understand. He took a deep breath, then reached over for Essek’s hand.

“Maybe it was just enchanted to find you wherever you are. Like a Sending spell.”

“I’d hate to think otherwise. That would mean—”

Caleb interrupted him out of mercy. “Every inch of our tower is warded from divination. Besides, you’ve adopted an endless array of personas. I don’t even think we’ve been seen together with you as Thain, not since the party years ago.”

“Still.” Essek rubbed his eyes. “The timing makes me think he knows something. That, and the fact that it’s for Thain, I mean—what has Thain accomplished? I don’t even remember telling anyone I was a mage!”

“That, ah…that might have been Jester’s fault. She really enjoyed adding to your personas. You needed a past, after all, otherwise you would have just appeared from nowhere.”

“So she told everyone that Thain was a famous wizard?”

“The best lies are often true,” Caleb shrugged. “Though I admit that she might have gone a little overboard. You know how much she likes to praise her friends.”

It was a testament to Essek’s troubled mood that he barely acknowledged this. Caleb squeezed his fingers. “They said…they did say you could reject them. And their political reasoning is not unsound. Maybe that is all there is to it—the Assembly needs someone to be the Headmaster, and they thought of you.”

Even after so many years of trying, Caleb’s reassuring voice still left some things desired. Essek shut his eyes.

“My love, the very idea that the Cerberus Assembly is even thinking of me is a nightmare.”

 “Fair enough.”

“I just want to know why,” Essek muttered. “Why now? Why me? What is he after?”

“I don’t know,” Caleb said. “I wish I did.”

Essek suddenly turned toward him. “I—I hate to ask this, but can you find out? You know…ask our old friend the newest Archmage.”

“Ah.” Caleb’s face gave a complicated shuffle, one common these days when Astrid was mentioned.

“If you don’t want to—” Essek hurried.

“No, no, I can…try.” He scratched his chin. “She’s just been less open, lately. She’s not…pleased by how thorough the Soul is being. Beauregard is relentless.”

“It has been seven years. That’s a lot for your kind, but probably just enough for Da’leth to finally realize they mean business—” Essek blinked. “Do you think that’s why he picked me?”

“We don’t know that he’s behind this,” Caleb said lamely. At Essek’s expression, he relented. “Alright, alright. I’ll stop suggesting otherwise.”

“It’s not unappreciated, I just prefer to be direct. It is clear that Da’leth is trying to use me again. This time, in order to hurt you and the Cobalt Soul. There is no point in believing otherwise.”

Caleb brushed Essek’s face. “No, that would require him to think he could use you in the first place. But that is impossible, because Thain does not know Widogast.”

“He does, though.”

“Yes, but is Da’leth aware of that? He cannot be.”

“I thought we put an end to that.”

“Only to statements of idle hope, not facts.” Caleb was now holding both his hands. “The truth of the matter is that…yes, perhaps the Martinet does want you for some devious plan—”

“Oh, lovely—”

“—however, any plan he has cannot be based on our connection. We have been doing this…being us, for seven years now, Essek. If he were going to play against that hand, he would have done so already. This must be something else.”

Essek huffed. “What, though? What reason does he have? I haven’t been important to the Kryn for years. I resigned, I’m virtually a stranger there, and I certainly don’t have any more secrets for sale.” He paused. “Well, ones that Ludinus would desire. I’m useless to him.”

“I highly doubt that,” Caleb said. And his voice, while kind, had a faint edge to it. “You are right in that there probably is some motivation here. It might be related to the investigation in other ways—after all, two members of the Assembly are leaving. That makes four upheavals in under a decade. And if the Soul and the crown are both pushing for the appointment of more partial Archmages, then it might very well be the case that Da’leth just wants someone he can control. In your case, through blackmail.”

“Hooray for me.”

“He probably wouldn’t, though,” Caleb said. “Since, as you said, this is a situation of mutually assured destruction.”

Essek grimaced. “I have been somewhat wishful in that department. Even with your support, it is still my word against the Martinet.”

“Our word. That includes the Cobalt Soul.”

Essek shook his head. “You’ve seen how well he’s stood up to them so far. Can you honestly say that my safety is a sure thing? Don’t lie to me, Caleb.”

There was a pause.

“Essek, I will do everything in my power to protect you.”

"I know." He patted Caleb on the hand.

Outside their tower, far away, the evening bells of the Rexxentrum began to ring. One, and then two, and then almost a dozen, loud and bronze across the dimming sky.

“There is one way to find out for sure what Da’leth is planning.”

Essek sighed. “I know. But I don’t like it.”

Caleb leaned back in his seat. “Neither do I.”

The cry of the great bells waned. In their den, all around the wall, points of magelight flared to life—flickering and purple harbingers of night.

“Will you do it?” Caleb said.

“I don’t know if I have a choice.”

“You do,” Caleb said. “The worst-case scenario is that Da’leth tries to talk, and we…deal with that.”

“We’ve been trying to deal with him for years,” Essek said. “And…maybe this is bold of me to say, but the worst-case scenario isn’t that—it’s not knowing. Maybe I can…maybe I can find the answers here. If Da’leth thinks he is controlling me, if he trusts me to do his bidding, maybe I can finally learn something to break his hold.”

“As long as he never truly controls you,” Caleb said. “That is a risk I cannot accept.”

This time, Essek was the one to offer assurance. He gently pressed a kiss to Caleb’s hand.

“You forget,” he said wryly. “I am a powerful wizard. Haven’t you heard my title?”

“Shadowhand?” Caleb said. He did not look fully mollified, but he managed a chuckle. “I thought you were retired.”

Essek smiled. “I was, my love, but now it seems that I have a new role. Starting soon...you will be sharing your home with the next Headmaster of the Soltryce Academy.”

—

✨ Ko-Fi Link in Bio! ✨ | Requests are OPEN :3

[vyeoh]

this is your chance: wax poetic about an Empires or DSMP character of your choice to a fan who is new to both. Explain why I should love them. I need guidance in this new and meme-populated land.

okok this is a lot of pressure haha. Spoilers for EmpiresSMP and DreamSMP below, obviously. I wrote a lot so prepare yourself, anon

I watch a lot of empires POVs but the ones I most anticipate every week are Scott and Sausage.

c!Scott (I'll call him Smajor for the sake of simplicity) starts off the series chilling, not really getting involved with the rest of the server, and staying aggressively neutral. After all, he's an elf. He has lived far longer than most of the other rulers already, and will most likely outlive them for many years. So, the best thing is to stick to his mountains and not get invested in the dealings of mortal affairs, maybe sometimes causing problems on purpose and dipping because what's life without a little spice right.

But then, this demon comes to the server, Xornoth. He's going around causing havoc and wants to send the world into an eternal winter, but he doesn't bother the kingdom of Rivendell much so Smajor stays tentatively cautious but ultimately unbothered. But then, the puzzle pieces start falling together. The first thing that the audience noticed was was Xornoth sounded like Smajor, but we mostly thought that this was just due to cc!Scott voicing both of them and there was nothing more to it. However, then, the people the demon starts possessing start chanting in elvish. The demon hates mortals, and the elves are conveniently one of the two confirmed not fully mortal races in Empires.

This culminates when Smajor stumbles across a cave that contains the backstory of the patron god of Rivendell, Aeor. Basically, there's two opposing forces, Aeor and Exor, and both have a champion. In a previous life, those champions were two brothers, where Aeor eventually prevailed and banished Exor. In this life though, the champions are - you guessed it - Smajor, and the demon Xornoth.

So now Smajor is like. Well fuck. It's my literal god-given destiny to be responsible for defeating this demon who is technically my brother, and if I fail the server gets plunged into an eternal winter. And I have no fucking clue what is happening because I've just been here on this mountain actively trying to stay out of the issues outside my kingdom. We watch him panic and teeter on the verge of spiraling for an entire episode, and when the followers of Xornoth go to the End to kill the dragon, releasing Xornoth's full powers, he fails to stop him. Smajor is a character who was used to being the smart one, the prepared one, the one who has the least deaths on the server. But he's also a character who runs away from his problems and ignores them. Before and during the dragon fight, we hear the desperation in his voice, as he's thrown into a situation he is wholly unprepared for, and it's bigger than him going to the Cod Empire to kill their king, or assisting in other people's plans to kill the codfather. He can't run from this. cc!Scott plays this scene so well as well, as I've said before, one of the best parts of Scott's acting is how he's never super dramatic, but he's so effective in the little things like inflection to make you feel, viscerally, the panic and dread.

So after the dragon fight, Smajor realizes, I can't do this on my own. I've tried and failed. So he gets allies. We watch him, someone who has so strongly been an isolationist, learn the benefits of allies and watch him learn to trust others and watch him learn how to get that trust in return.

My favorite thing about Smajor's characterization is that he's an incompetent protagonist, but not in the way of the "plucky young adventurer". He's capable skill-wise, and fairly jaded and very pessimistic. However, his issue is that up until recently, he did not care about the rest of the server at all, and by the time he learned to, it was way too late.

Also, in 3rd Life, cc!Scott and cc!Jimmy were canonically married and they reference it sometimes in Empires. Like, Scott goes over to the Cod Empire every so often both in and out of character to kill and/or flirt with Jimmy, the ruler of the Cod Empire, which may develop as a secondary plot into the future who knows. So ty Scott for giving the gays what they want o7

Now onto Sausage: his is a story of Icarus, his hubris and ambition being his downfall. He's one of the two followers of Xornoth, who promised him endless power in exchange for his servitude. He started the series being eccentric, but not outright unhinged, but slowly gets more and more extreme as the series progresses, as he gets brought more and more to Xornoth's side.

One of the best parts of Sausage's character, in my opinion, is how his gradual corruption affects the people around him. Initially, he got into a conflict with the Cod Empire and was allied with two other people in the Witherrose alliance. They were allies, but also close friends. The fandom liked to joke that the three had sibling energy, and I'm pretty sure the ccs played to that even more lol.

It was painful to watch the other two members, Gem and fWhip, watch Sausage get corrupted right in front of them, and see them desperately clinging on to this old idea of Sausage in their head because if they faced the truth, it would mean that their friend was gone. Eventually, they do finally cut him out of the alliance, leading him to fully commit to the side of the demon. Sausage felt very clearly betrayed by this, and declared the remaining two Witherrose alliance members to be enemies.

He gets more and more possessed, and we even see the other Empires, his enemies even, slowly realize that something is very wrong with the ruler of Mythland. He starts doing more and more evil things, like killing people more, making sacrifices to the demon, and eventually helping to kill the dragon to free Xornoth. So things are good for Sausage, for a bit. He won, and is more powerful than ever. Then he finds out: he's going to die. Xornoth's possession is slowly killing his soul, and eventually, his body going to be fully taken over and he himself is going to be trapped in the spirit realm. So how do you react to this? Over the next few episodes, we watch Sausage struggle between "the demon is literally killing me" and "the demon has given me so much, and I love it", all while Xornoth takes over more and more of him. We hear him exclaim that "don't worry!! I'm still about 15% there!" while trying to downplay every time Xornoth completely takes over his body. We watch him willingly oppose anyone who is trying to end the thing that is killing him.

My favorite thing about Sausage is that he is undoubtedly evil and proud of it, but he's also undoubtedly human. If you like to watch evil characters go absolutely feral, he's the guy for you. He makes the deal with Xornoth in the beginning, knowing and fully embracing the evilness of the demon, but at the same time he knows what he's doing is detrimental to both himself and everyone around him, but he's gotten in way too deep at this point, and to be fair the demon has held up its end fo the bargain, right?

Also, I would be damned if I don't talk about cc!Sausage's editing. Every one of his videos is like a movie. The way he does camera angles and uses music is so skillful- every lore scene feels like something out of a high fantasy action saga (think: LotR). Every big lore event I always wait in anticipation for Sausage's ep because his editing truly takes lore to another level.

I'm just generally very excited to see where this series goes. Empires is such a good mix of talented builders and good lore. Part of the reason why the series is so immersive for me, beyond any other lore smp, is that they have the settings to back it up. There is a certain charm to the DreamSMP's objectively terrible builds (with a few exceptions) but in Empires, the settings help sell the plot so much.

Another part of why I love EmpiresSMP is how much the ccs are involved with the fan community. I'm sure you've seen the memes about Scott being on tumblr, and Sausage regularly goes through the EmpiresSMP fanart tag on Twitter and likes art, even ones not related to Mythland. Most of the ccs, in fact, have brought up tumblr content on stream at some point or another. Like, several ccs have said that they read tumblr lore theories and hcs and stuff and sometimes take inspiration from them. Fun fact: Rivendell's church was inspired by my pinned drawing; confirmed by Scott Smajor himself. It's just such a good cycle of ccs and fans being excited about each other.

As for DreamSMP, I'm gonna be honest here, the only person I really am invested in in Technoblade. I started watching when he joined the server, and he's the only person whose lore I keep up to date with.

Techno's fun to watch because he's like the Deadpool of DreamSMP. Virtually unkillable, very skilled and scary, but consistently cracks jokes and breaks the 4th wall during plot. His POV is just fun. Like, he does wild plans and gives speeches and some of the stuff that happens to him should be called deus ex machine if it wasn't for the fact that Technoblade is the one who's doing it, and all the stuff is grounded in the fact that cc!Techno is just that good at the game.

However, the fact that he rarely takes anything seriously makes the few times Techno is 100% serious so much more impactful. His whole character has a basis in being perceived as inhuman and being treated as such, and therefore in return trying to hide his humanity. So, when he shows that humanity, whether that's fear, anger, or genuine love for his friends, it really makes you go "oh shit."

Techno's often said not to have character development, but I'd argue that while he remains steadfast in his moral code, he develops leaps and bounds as a person. Like, at the beginning, he's brought onto the server to help Wilbur and Tommy overthrow a government; them knowing he's 1) an anarchist and 2) very very powerful. His character was more of a plot device at that point and was treated as such in the canon. Wilbur and Tommy straight-up lie to him about their plans to establish another government after they overthrow the current one, while he was led on to believe that they were abolishing all governments in the area. But he isn't a plot device. He's a person, as much as he only shows the terrifying, blood god side of himself.

After the establishment of New Lmanburg (the new government its a long story), his friend Phil joins. And for the first time, we see him be fully human with someone and we see someone treat him like a human. Like, we saw glimpses before, with Wilbur and Tommy in Pogtopia, but Phil is the first person we noticeably see he trusts 100%. Then Doomsday happens, and Techno essentially retires to the tundra. During this time, we see Techno learn to be more human, first with Ranboo, then Niki when he establishes the Syndicate. In fact, the two of them, along with Phil, canonically throw him a birthday party, which is a far cry from his treatment in Pogtopia.

Techno's development is one of a god learning to be human, and I just think he <3

[warrioreowynofrohan]

On Doriathrin Isolationism

I’ve seen a fair number of takes in the Silm fandom on the topic of either “the Noldor are horrible imperialists” or “the Sindar are horrible isolationists”, so I thought it would be interesting to take a closer look at Doriathrin policy.

Firstly, how isolationist are they, following the creation of the Girdle of Melian? They still have close relations with the Laiquendi of Ossiriand, and some of them come to Doriath. They still have close relations with Círdan and are in communication with him. They’re fairly close with the children of Finarfin: Galadriel lives in Doriath, the others visit, Finrod is close enough with Thingol to act as an intermediary between him and the Haladin, and Thingol is the one who tells Finrod of the location for Nargothrond. The dwarves continue travelling to Doriath, and trading, and living there for long periods to do commissioned craft-work, through long periods of the First Age, even after the Nirnaeth - the Nauglamír Incident could never have happened if not for that. All these people can pass freely into Doriath. So we’re not talking about Doriath cutting itself off from the rest of the world, not by any means. We’re talking specifically about its relations with three groups: 1) the Fingolfinian and Fëanorian Noldor; 2) the Edain; and 3) the Northern Sindar.

Every time I try to write this post it gets really long, so here I’m going to focus on Doriath’s relationship with the first and third groups, other Elves, and leave the Edain for a separate post.

Doriath and the Northern Sindar

Thingol’s attitude towards this group is the least excusable, and something I wasn’t aware of until I got my hands on a copy of The Peoples of Middle-earth (HoME Vol. 12):

[Thingol] had small love for the Northern Sindar who had in regions near to Angband come under the dominion of Morgoth, and were accused of sometimes entering his service and providing him with spies. The Sindarin used by the Sons of Fëanor also was of the Northern dialect; and they were hated in Doriath.

Now, to be clear, Thingol is wrong about the Northern Sindar being shifty. They’re the ones more commonly described in The Silmarillion as the grey-elves of Hithlum. They make up a substantial portion of the people of Gondolin. They include Annael and his people, who raise Tuor. (Presumably others live in, or moved to, East Beleriand along with the Fëanorians, as the Fëanorians speak their tongue.) 

Here is what I think probably happened. We have statements in The Silmarillion that Morgoth captured elves when he could, and that:

“The Noldor feared most the treachery of those of their own kin, who had been thralls in Angband; for Morgoth used some of these for his evil purposes, and feigning to give them liberty sent them abroad, but their wills were chained to his, and they strayed only to com back to him again; therefore if any of his captives escaped in truth, and returned to their own people, they had little welcome, and wandered alone outlawed and desperate”. 

If Morgoth also captured some of the Northern Sindar - who, living closer to Angband, would be more at risk of this than Doriathrim, Falathrim, or Laiquendi - there could, as with later Noldor prisoners, have been some who were under his control and attacked and betrayed other elves. The Doriathrin Sindar, living further from Angband, might have been unaware of their capture, conflated this with deliberate and willful treachery, and so mistrusted the Northern Sindar.

That does not excuse Thingol’s attitude. He is stereotyping, and he is claiming kingship of all Beleriand while writing off a substantial portion of his own people, and this is unacceptable. One cannot claim rule of a people while simultaneously disdaining them and forswearing respinsibility for them. It is little surprise than the Northern Sindar largely joined themselves with various groups of Noldor and would have been glad of their arrival.

Doriath and the Noldor

This case is more complicated. I don’t like conflations of Thingol’s attitude towards the Fingolfinian and Fëanorian Noldor - or the Edain, for that matter - with anti-immigration sentiment. The basic concept of immigration is that you want to go to another country and live as a member of that country. When you enter an existing realm, claim its territory as your own, set up your own government, and justify it on the basis of “you’re not militarily able to stop us” that is not immigration. That is called an invasion, or annexation, or something of the sort. (Even if the realm in question is currently under invasion by enemies! Imagine if the British, after D-Day, had tried to annex half of France.)

(I will also note here that Thingol did not abandon the rest of the people of Beleriand prior to the Noldor’s arrival. The First Battle was the Doriathrim fighting alongside the Laiquendi. When Morgoth’s invasion became too large to fight on every front, the creation of the Girdle was the right choice. When assaulted by an overwhelming enemy force, the best, and indeed only militarily possible, option may be to withdraw as many of your people as possible to your fortress (as Thingol does - many of the Laiquendi and as many as possible of the grey-elves of Western Beleriand are evacuated to Doriath) and buckle down for a siege.) 

And the Noldor didn’t come with the Sindar’s benefit in mind. (As I have noted before, they were not even away of Angband’s existence. The Return was focused on fighting one very dangerous individual, regaining the Silmarils, and setting up realms in - if we’re being generous to the Noldor - presumably unoccupied territory. If we’re not being generous, the aim can equally well be read as setting themselves up as the rulers of the elves of Middle-earth. If their goal, or even a tiny part of their goal, was “rescue the Sindar”, then they could have pitched that to Olwë to get him on board - “help us rescue your brother from Morgoth” is a way stronger argument than “you owe us, you cultureless barbarians”.)

So, given that they’re annexing his territory without even considering that it might be someone else’s territory, it’s very understandable that Thingol isn’t pleased by the Noldor.  

On the other hand, Beleriand does benefit from the Noldor’s presence. Maedhros is quite correct when he points out that Thingol’s alternative to having the Nolder in northern Beleriand would be having orcs there [ironically, the Fëanorians do more harm to Doriath than orcs ever do, but that’s far in the future]. So given that the Sindar and Noldor have a common and very dangerous enemy, Thingol should at least try to work wth them. His deliberate isolation from the Noldor even prior to finding out about the Kinslaying comes across as prideful and petty. I am thinking particular of the absolutely minimal Doriathrin participation in Mereth Aderthad, when Fingolfin was specifically seeking to build a Beleriand-wide alliance, something that was in all their interests; and, addtionally, of not allowing the Nolofinwëans into Doriath. It automatically precludes any high-level negotiations or, just as importantly, any amount of in-person interaction that could lead to greater understanding. I can understand Thingol’s attitude towards Mereth Aderthad on some level - Fingolfin is in effect acting as though he is High King of Beleriand, something Thingol would resent - but it is nonetheless shortsighted.

It’s also worth noting, though, that acting with more tact and treating Thingol as King of Beleriand - as in fact he was throughout the Ages of the Stars - would not necessarily have posed any great difficulty or impeded Noldoran autonomy in decision-making in northern Beleriand. Notably, Thingol is on good terms with Finrod, gives him the location for building Nargothrond, and has no problems with him setting up a realm governing a large swath of West Beleriand. And yes, being relatives doesn’t hurt, but what stands out in this relationship is that Finrod treats Thingol with respect. He understand that Thingol knows more about Beleriand than him, and asks advice; when the Edain arrive, he’s the only one of the Noldor to consult with Thingol on his decisions (and that willingness to consult is what gets Thingol to agree to the Haladin settling in Brethil). And none of this prevents Finrod, or Orodreth after him, from having autonomy from Doriath in their decisions as lords of Nargothrond.

However, another interesting point is that Thingol’s early attitude towards the Noldor is not driven only by resentment of their infringements on his authority, but also by outright mistrust that doesn’t seem to be clearly grounded. Note that, after Galadriel tells Melian about Morgoth’s slaying of Finwë and theft of the Silmarils (which is well after Mereth Aderthad), Melian and Thingol talk, and Thingol says of the Noldor, “Yet all the more sure shall they be as allies against Morgoth, with whom it is not now to be thought they shall ever make treaty.” [Emphasis mine.] Which means that prior to this, he was genuinely worried about the Noldor allying with Morgoth! To paraphase The Order of the Stick, Thingol took Improved Paranoia several levels ago. (But he always seems to be paranoid about the wrong things. The Fëanorians are a threat, but not because of any possible league with Morgoth. Likewise, he is hostile to Beren because of dreams of a Man bringing doom to Doriath, but Thingol’s death and the first destruction of Doriath is instead set off by the actions of Húrin in bringing the cursed Nauglamír.)

So on the whole, neither the Noldor nor Thingol are behaving ideally in their early relations. After Thingol learns about Alqualondë, I find his hostility - especially to the Fëanorians - very warranted.  These aren’t some distant, once-related group of elves, these are his brother’s people! And “willing to betray and attack their friends” is not a quality anyone is looking for in an ally, nor something that is going to lead to trust.  

This also carries over to everything relating to the Leithian and the Silmaril. (Again, it is important to note with respect to the Leithain that Thingol states outright, after giving Beren the quest that he has zero expectation of - or desire for - Beren to obtain the Silmaril.  It’s a combination suicide mission and “when pigs fly” statement, and most people who say “when pigs fly” aren’t aiming at the invention of animatronic flying pigs.) In a theoretical world where the Kinslaying didn’t happen and the Fëanorians had no involvement in the Quest of the Silmaril, they might have had  a good shot at negotiating for it! (A much better shot than they had at getting it out of Angband, which they never even tried.) But of course Thingol would have no interest in handing it over to the people who, on top of the Kinslaying, also 1) betrayed his nephew and sent him to his death [that’s kind of on you as well, Elu], 2) kidnapped and attempted to rape his daughter; and 3) attempted to murder his daughter. And there should not be any reasonable expectation that he ought to do so! By their actions, the Fëanorians have forfeited any right to demand anything at all from Thingol, or from Beren and Lúthien, or from their descendents. 

(This is, in fact, the very point made in the Doom of Mandos: their oath shall drive them and yet betray them. Every Fëanorian action driven by the oath is counterproductive to them obtaining any of the Silmarils.)

Conclusion

In short:

- Yes, the Noldor are imperialist in their goals, but in they end they’re not ruling anyone who isn’t willing to be ruled by them. And the Northern Sindar who are part of their realms are people who Thingol had explicitly written off, which doesn’t reflect well on him.

- Doriath is not as isolationist as it is often portrayed and has close relations with many of the peoples in Beleriand. It also does participate in the wars against Morgoth (I’ll go into that in more detail in my Edain post). And they have valid grievances against the Fëanorians. However, Thingol’s deliberate snubbing of the FIngolfinian Noldor (and even before he knew about the Kinslaying), despite the evident benefits of planning a common defense of Beleriand, is selfish and petty.

[gaslightgallows]

29. Her ancestors sometimes come and peer out of the windows of her eyes. (Blake's 7, Cally) @bunn1cula

Sometimes Cally wondered what her people would think of her, if they could see her now. There had been no time on Saurian Major to mourn for what she had left behind, for the home she had turned her back on, the family, the history—and then when there was time to mourn for her own losses, she was too consumed with rage. She had been unable to join her fellow fighters in death, so she would find companions to die with her.

And so she had, though not precisely in the way she had expected.

She liked Avon the most of her new crewmates; she believed in Blake and she trusted them all to have her back in a crisis, but Avon was the one she simply liked. He was the same as her—an outsider among his own people, as she had been among hers. She could not exactly say that she confided in Avon, but they talked, sometimes, as they were working on the engines or the communications systems.

And he listened. Even when he was making a show of ignoring her, Cally knew he was hearing every word she said. Cataloging information for his own purposes, to use later. He didn’t entirely trust her, she knew, because she was an alien, but then, he didn’t trust anyone else on the ship, human or otherwise, so she didn’t take that lack personally. It wasn’t important. He listened.

“I wonder, sometimes, what my twin and my other sisters would think of my life now.”

Avon didn’t look up from the diagnostic read-outs. “Does it matter?”

“I suppose not. It’s not as though I can go back to Auron and ask them.” Cally passed him the laser probe in response to his unspoken request; they had fallen very quickly into an understanding of one another’s body language. It wasn’t mind-reading, but it was good to be able to communicate with Avon without the need for speaking aloud. Bodies were less imperfect than words. “And after all, they would hardly understand. ”

“That is the nature of families. And of isolationist societies.” He reached over her arm for another tool; his presence in her space was like a physical impact, but for all that, not offensive. He never overstayed his welcome, and she was careful to always do the same. He met her eyes briefly as he drew back. He frowned as he studied her, and Cally wondered what it was that he was looking for, or seeing. “There’s no context, among such people, for what it’s like to be an alien among aliens.”

“No,” Cally agreed.

Avon was right, of course. He frequently was (although not nearly as often as he thought he was). Even if she had been able to communicate with her people across such vast distances, either via the ship or her own telepathic powers, who could she have spoken to? And what could she have said?

She lay in her cabin during her assigned rest periods and wondered, debated, longed for home, if only for the chance to state her case before the elders again as to why she should be allowed back, why Auron should not stand idly by. When she slept, or even sometimes when she was awake, visions came to her of her parents (who raised her) and her foremothers (from whom she had been cloned over countless generations. And they asked her, What are you fighting for? Why?

Cally always had the same answer for them. But she never quite remembered it, when she was alone.

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

HASO “Dream Come True.”

Hope you guys enjoy, and hope you all have a great day!

Adam took a drink before setting the glass back down on the table. Across from him, Donovan Red took a pull on his whisky, drinking deeply before setting his glass down wiping his mouth with the back of his hand.

“I’m Sorry about your man….. I didn’t intend for things to go that way.” Adam said staring down at the amber liquid in the glass before him.

Donavan signed, “Not your fault. Sometimes pride gets the better of us, and it’s hard to admit that an outsider might be able to beat us at our own game.” he patted Adam on the shoulder, “But you saved my life, which means I am, and will forever be in your debt.” He smiled 

Adam tilted his head.

“That doesn’t seem to bother you too much.”

“I think there are much worse people to be indebted to. A least I know you won’t ask me to do something I don’t want to do. Not like other men I know.” He took another drink, the tattoos on his neck bobbing once and then twice as he swallowed, “So, tell me this favor that you are looking for. How can me and mine be of service.”

Adam sighed and slumped back in his seat. He felt like he should definitely be keeping quiet about what he wanted to tell the man, but it was hard keeping it to himself and the people on his ship.It would be nice if someone else knew what was going on.

And wasn’t that the point.

Isn’t that why he had come here.

“When I joined the UNSC, I never thought about politics. I was a fighter pilot and then a spaceship captain. I am no politician, but more and more I find myself having to do politics like things. People ask for my opinions on policy, and they encourage me to support one group over another. I have to manuver as a diplomat for the GA without trying to piss off the actual diplomat, who isn’t too happy that I sometimes get in the way of them doing their job.

I am the human representative to all of humanity, and I have to behave the right way, but, sometimes, in doing what I know is right people get mad at me for it. I am worried one day they are going to give me an order that I just can’t follow. Not to mention that I have suddenly become the figurehead for an entire political movement. Sometimes I have to make speeches now.” he threw up his hands, “I represent a coalition interested in cooperating with the GA and all her interests, but there is a very heavy isolationist mindset on earth that is mad that we ever even joined the UNSC. They have already attempted to assassinate me once, and I have no doubt that they are going to do it again.”

Donavan grunted and looked him over, “Yes, I remember hearing about that.” He looked Adam up and down slowly, “No offence, but you would make a shit politician.”

Adam sighed and nodded, “I know. The only reason that I have so much pull in the arena is based on what I represent, and how the GA feels about me, but now…. Now I am learning that there are factions of the GA that want me gone.”

Donavan rased an eyebrow in surprise, “The GA?”

Adam shrugged and sighed pushing his glass away from him, “Yes, some very powerful people are after me for something I never intended to do.”

“And who is this exactly?”

Adam shut his mouth forcing himself to think about it for a moment before finally making his decision.

He sighed and leaned back in his chair, “The chairwoman of the GA herself.”

Red almost choked on his drink, spewing some of it out onto the table before swallowing hard and setting his glass down very slowly.

“WHAT!”

“Adam nodded. I was chasing after some information, and infiltrated the pirate wing of the anti-alliance coalition as a man named captain Kell.”

Red held up a hand, “Hold on, YOU are Kell, no shit. I heard the guy was one badass pirate.”

Adam adjusted his eye-patch, “I AM one badass pirate, but either way, I used that cover to get to their leaders and saw a transmission being sent from the chairwoman of the GA that was ordering those men and women to kill me if they could manage it, and now I don’t know what to do. The chairwoman pretty much helped me get my job. As far as I can recall she was one of the most supportive when it came to my promotion to captain. Thought we were allies if not friends, and now I come to learn that she has been operating behind my back to stage my assasination.”

Red leaned up against the table, “Well no shit, that does suck.” He tapped his fingers together, “And of course you can’t tell anyone without proof, otherwise they aren’t going to believe you. If you are going to come up with allegations like those, then you are going to need hard evidence against her.

Adam nodded, “And I do have some evidence, the recording of what she said, but those sorts of things can be doctored. I need to expose her somehow. I don’t know how all of this fits in of course, but it is partially why I came to speak with you.”

Red waited and Adam continued.

“I can’t trust anyone within the GA, or even within the UNSC. My only option is to go outside the law like my enemies are doing. Fight fire with fire so to say. If they are using the criminal underbelly to try and kill me, then maybe I can use it to try and save me.”

Donavan was nodding slowly, “And you are hoping to fight fire with fire to speak?”

Adam sighed, “I don’t know what I am hoping , but I know for a fact you and your men have the most power in this system, enough that everyone knows but no one questions it. I know you can go deeper than I can ever attempt, and I was hoping that maybe you could keep an eye out for me, track the movements of the criminal underworld so to speak while I try and deal with those people who are pretending to do things legally.”

Red nodded slowly, ‘That is something I can do”

“But is it something you are willing to do?”

He tilted his head back thoughtfully to look up at the ceiling above, “I think it is. Not much different from things my men and I already do accept this time it is going to be for a worthy cause.”

He grinned, his gold capped teeth glittering in the dim light, “I-”

Just then, the implant in the side of his neck began to buzz. He held up a hand for Red to be silent, and the other man nodded leaning back in his seat to finish his drink as Adam answered the call.

“Madam president.” His tone of surprise roused red who raised an eyebrow.

“I have to say this is…. This is rather shocking. I didn’t know that you had this number.”

“I can have any number that interests me Admiral.”

“Yes of course.” He shifted nervously in his seat, “What can I do for you ma’am.”

“Do you know what important event happened on July 20th 1969, Admiral.”

He paused not entirely sure if this was a trick question.

“Go on. I know you of all people would know it.”

“The Apollo 11 moon landing ma’am.’

“More precisely, the 2051 anniversary of the Apollo 11 moon landing. And it has been long in coming but   the Global Aeronautics Space Division has decided to celebrate the occasion by recreating Apollo 11 down to every historical accuracy. The calculations will be done partially by hand and partially by computer. The Ship design will be exactly that of Apollo 11, etc. etc.”

Despite the stress he had been under the last few days, he felt his heart skip a beat.

“Wait, are…. Are you serious! That is amazing!”

“Yes yes.” She said cutting him off.

“And they want…. Or all of us want you to pilot that ship and command the mission as Commander Neil Armstrong would have in his time.”

The only response he was able to manage was a squeak, and he could feel the fangirl in him coming on hard and fast. He tried to clear his throat and remain professional, his heart pounding, a wide grin setting off across his face.

“Yes Ma’am you can count me in.”

“How confident are you that you can pilot the rocket?”

“I can fly anything ma’am.”

“Even so, we would like you back on earth as soon as possible to prepare for the event. This is a big historical recreation, and we want it to go as well as possible.”

“yes ma’am.”

The line went dead and he was no longer able to fight back the grin on his face.

Red watched him before standing, “We will get to work Admiral, and we will keep in contact. It’s good to know that my men and women are going to have something useful to occupy their time instead of sitting around twiddling their thumbs.”

Adam stood as well and took the man’s hand, “It should be a pleasure working with you.”

Red snorted skeptically, “You are too kind. I doubt it will be so pleasant, but consider yourself as a man who has friends in very low places.”

The two of them nodded and Adam excused himself back to his ship, racing towards his rooms with the giddy excitement of a school boy. The clind in him had awoken. He stopped to sit on the edge of his bed staring at the tiny recreated model of the lunar module sitting on the shelf above his bed glowing blue in the neon light above.

How cool was this going to be.

How dangerous was this going to be?

***

Eris was pleased to learn that she was not lactose intolerant. They hadn’t been sure based on her half alien half human anatomy if she would be able to handle some of the more harsh foods of the planet, but everything seemed to be working properly, a fact she was forever thankful for as she polished off her second bowl of ice cream.

She found the treat novel and delectable.

Leave it to human to think of eating flavored snow, or at least frozen cream.

And she liked it when they put little bits of candy on top.

Martha Sat on the floor next to the couch, and her husband sat in his chair watching ‘the Game’. Eris wasn’t sure what the rules were, but she liked watching them crash into each other. She wasn’t a big fan of all the talking they seemed to do in between the crashing together.

Martha and Jim had invited her to stay over for as long as she wanted after she told them the more detailed story of her life. They had been shocked  but ultimately unsurprised to learn that she was less than three years old feeling sorry that she never got to have her childhood.

That’s why they were treating her like this, she knew.

They wanted to give her that little bit of her childhood.

She worried that they would be annoyed at her presence, but they seemed to have time with her sticking around indefinitely as far as she could tell . She wasn’t sure how long she was going to be staying, but for now, she was happy where she was.

Of course part of her being welcome had something to do with how Martha had no one to model clothes for her. Since her youngest son left the house she had been forced to model them herself, which made things difficult when she wanted to make alterations. But now that she had Eris, things were going much more smoothly,

At first Eris had been embarrassed to put on the clothing for her.

Once upon a time Eris hadn’t known better in thinking her body was weird. She had floated around without it using a gravity belt and no clothes, letting her long dark hair and ribbons cover what needed to be covered, but the more she learned about humans, the more self conscious she had grown, until hoodies and baggy pants were the only things she wore.

Martha did not approve of her wardrobe seeming to think Eris would look very striking in red or black.

Eris had tried on a few outfits for her nervousness at just how much of her alien otherness tended to show, with plunging backs and short skirts to show off her marble whie legs. Martha seemed to think the ribbons were pretty, and in everything she had Eris try on, they were on full display.

“Do they work like starborn ribbons?” Martha wondered, “I know they act sort of as solar sales, storing energy from the sun and using that to glide.”

Eris paused, “I don’t know. I was born on noctropolis where there is no sun, so I have never tried it.”

“I think you should.”

Eris shifted nervously, “But.”

Martha just smiled at her, “our backyard is fenced in, no one is going to see you.” Eris thoughts bout it for a moment and then set her bowl down to the side. She stood slowly and walked to the back sliding screen door and stepped out onto their back porch.

Technically it was only fenced in on two sides. The backside was open where the forest  met their lawn growing deep and black as it went further back in to the depths.

Nervously Eris reached up and pulled off her hoodie dropping iit to the ground.

The tank top she wore had been made by Martha to accommodate her ribbons.

Once upon a time her gravity belt had allowed those ribbons to wave and undulate, but here they sagged with gravity and flowed behind her in the occasional wind current.

She turned around so they were facing the sun and waited.

And waited.

She felt nothing happening and was abut to go inside when.

When something started to happen.

She felt more…. Energized. Her blood seemed to grow warm and a smile spread across her face. At  first she thought it was just all in her head, but then the warmth continued to blossom over her.

Her eyes went wide and she hummed softly feeling recharged from the sun like a battery.

She had her eyes closed and was just enjoying the radiation when she heard something ringing from the inside of the house followed by voices.

She was able to tear herself away from the warmth and stick her head inside.

“Adam, how are you doing.” Jim said and Eris could see Adam’s face projected on the TV.

She recognized a bit of herself in him. She had his nose, and his eyes shape.

“You are not going to believe who just called me.”

Martha smiled as she walked over to sit next to her husband, “Adam I wouldn’t be surprised if it was the president herself.”

Adam frowned some of the wind momentarily taken out of his sales, “Ok, yes it was the president, but.” e lit up almost immediately, “But you are not going to believe what she asked me to do.” He didn’t wait for them to guess, “She wants me to fly a recreated mission of the Apollo 11 moon landing. Historically accurate and everything!.” His grin was so wide it looked like he was going to split his face in half.

Martha’s eyes widened, “Really?”

Jim frowned, “That is great Adam, but…. Historically accurate?”

He nodded vigorously, “Yeah.”

“Son yu do realize the computer they used was less powerful than your mother’s automatic blow dryer.”

He waved a hand, “Yeah yeah, I know I know. Most of the math is probably going to be done by hand.”

Jim snorted and Martha grimaced, “Adam, sometimes I wish you had safer hobbies. I mean flying the omen is one thing, with those shields she could probably survive a meteor impact, but you understand the Apollo 11 mission flew in a rocket that  that parts no heavier duty than your average tin can.”

“yes , and that makes it even more awesome.”

“I think you are getting dangerous and awesome confused again, son.”

“Oh come on, this is like a dream come true for me. ‘

Finally Martha and Jim sighed and broke out into smiles, “There is no changing your mind as usual.”

Adam grinned, “Nope.”

He turned his head just then, seeming to look through the camera, his eyes falling on Eris. Shock spread across his face, “Eris, is that you?”

She smiled shyly and moved forward, “Yeah, It’s me.”

“What are you doing there, I thought you were working at the hybrid foundation taking care of Glados and the others.”

She shrugged guiltily, “I…. well glados and the others wanted to go back to the adapted planet, and after that others started getting adopted, but then I sort of burnt out and wanted to come here and meet…..” She paused not sure if she should say 

Martha put an arm around her, “She wanted to meet her grandparents and extended family.”

Adam looked surprised for a moment as if not having expected that before shrugging, “Just try to avoid mom’s side of the family if at all possible.”

“Adam.” Martha scolded, though she wasn’t actually mad.

He grinned, “I’ll be home in a few days.” he looked at eris, “Maybe I can show you around town when I get back….. If that’s something you’d be interested in?”

Eris shuffled her feet and quietly looked down, “Yeah,i’d like that.”

She wished she could read his thoughts in that moment. Was he only offering to be polite? She knew better than anyone that her birth had not been his fault. He had had his DNA stolen to  make her, but still she couldn’t help but feel an affinity towards him. One that she knew wasn’t fiar for her to feel.

He hadn’t chosen for her to be born after all.

Not like other people 

Did he just feel guilty?

Was she unwanted?

[jackoshadows]

TWoW speculation and other rambling thoughts.  

One of the things I am most curious/interested about in the next book is if Jon Snow is going to lose his POV. I think there is a 50% chance that he does because of two possible factors:

Jon comes back as a zombie fire wight. In which case, like Lady Stoneheart, we don’t get to read his thoughts anymore.

Jon becomes KITN in the next book through Robb’s will and as per GRRM’s unofficial rule, kings in the books don’t have POVs.

So there is a strong possibility that we will start seeing Jon through Melisandre, Theon, Asha and Davos - POVs in the North. GRRM has mentioned that he will bring together as many POVs as possible in TWoW. We already have confirmed Mel chapters in TWoW.

If he does lose his POV, it would make for a different take on Jon since we are no longer in his head. We would read him as we did Robb Stark. The issue would be that Jon is a very internal character. He does not say a lot but we understand where he is coming from with his POV. So I am not going to be happy losing that viewpoint.

Especially since we have the much awaited Jon-Arya reunion still pending. Him having to meet Dany. Jon and Tyrion.  And the revelation of his parentage -  one of those moments I am very much looking forward to reading.

Jon has very complex feelings about Ned. He loves and admires his father very much. The only fault that he attributes to Ned is his bastardy - that even the honorable Ned did this. He blames Ned in a way for his suffering. His relationship with Ygritte is complicated by the fact that he does not want a child of his to go through what he did. So finding out that Ned’s only fault - fathering a bastard - is not even true any more? That Ned forsake honor for his sister and her son. The emotional upheaval of everything he believed in being wrong. Is he going to be conflicted about Ned sending him to the wall without telling the truth?

I don’t think Jon is going to have any strong feelings one way or another about Rhaegar and Lyanna. I have read speculations of Jon either hating Rhaegar or loving him. Jon is going to be really surprised and be like “Whoa...Wut?”. But other than hearing the rare story about them, he does not know them enough to engender strong emotions about them. Ned never talked of Lyanna - she’s a statue in the crypt. Rhaegar is this mythological figure. I think Jon’s strongest emotions are going to be reserved for Ned Stark and a re-examination of his bastardy.

I have often read of how Jon wants to be a Stark more than anything else and that’s rather different to how I interpret the character’s need for belonging. Having grown up being otherized, Jon just wants to belong. He wants a tribe, a pack that he can call his own. Even his desire for family - for a wife and child - are connected to that feeling of having something of his own.

And we see that as he gradually embraces the brothers of the NW as family and considers Samwell to be a brother as dear to him as Robb. As the books progress, Jon’s notion of family widens farther than just the Starks. Arya being the only exception of course, because their bond is special. They belonged to each other. Jon thinks that Arya’s home is with him.

His feeling here are similar to Dany’s desire for the house with the red door, family and a childhood she never got to experience. Not about being Targaryen, but to belong and experience family and love.

This is the same underlying message of ‘The lone wolf dies while the pack survives’ that Arya is embodying in her narrative arc. This is something that Ned tells her to ask that she get along with her sister, but at it’s base is about ‘United we Stand, Divided we Fall’ and being about togetherness instead of division. It’s not just about the Starks.  Arya makes her own pack and tribe wherever she goes. Lommy, Gendry, Hot Pie. Syrion and Yoren. Brusco and Talea and Brea. Merry and her whores. This idea of packs is so entrenched in her that even her direwolf Nymeria has formed her own pack in the Riverlands.

And that’s why it’s so disappointing that the show took this theme of unity in Arya’s story and gave it to Sansa to make it all about the idiotic ‘Northern independence’ and turned the Starks into isolationist, xenophobic, traitorous fucks backstabbing an ally who helped save their lives against an existential apocalyptic threat.  That’s why it’s a sacrilege of everything Arya stands for in the books to reject Dany because ‘She’s not one of us’. That’s why Sansa wearing that crown and sitting on the throne after sowing division and hate instead of unity against the Others and Cersei makes the ending entirely nihilistic and bitter instead of bittersweet.

Three of GRRM’s main POV characters deal specifically with the underprivileged and dehumanized sections of society.  Jon and the Freefolk, Jon and the uneducated, common folk, prostitutes and thieves serving at the wall, Dany and the slaves, Dany and the Dothraki/unsullied, Arya and the smallfolk brutalized by war, Arya and outlaws and whores. They are each forming their own packs and tribes and unifying across cultures and class. And yet, D&D turned GRRM’s message of unity beyond borders and people to some twisted notion of Northern nationalism and supremacy.

So yeah, that’s why the show ending continues to be so unsatisfying in every way that matters and why GRRM’s books are telling an entirely different story. Will the reveal of Jon’s parentage make a difference in any way? I am not sure. But I sure hope that we don’t lose Jon’s POV and I get to read that emotional punch that is Jon’s reaction to this truth.

Write the bloody books, George 🙏🏼. Please.

[dungeoneering102]

The Virus of Common Language

So here’s a question for yall?

Why does everyone in D&D speak Common?

Well, there are two answers: 1) mechanical and 2) narrative ones. So let’s dive into that. 

Mechanical Answer

The pretty obvious answer as to “Why everyone knows Common” is so people can talk in the game. If your elf and my dwarf don’t both speak a shared language, being in a shared Party will very quickly become annoying as we cannot communicate in ANY way at all. So to mitigate, the VAGUE Common language is created, to have EVERY player speak the same language. For many this is enough. But here at Dungeoneering, we gotta be a bit more extra.

Narrative Answer

This is where it gets hard. Say you are a DM. How do you answer the above question? Why do the high elves, who are very xenophobic and tend to look down on most other races, would bother learning Common? Why would the dwarves, who are renowned for being isolationists? Or the orcs? Or anyone else really? There are multiple ways to answer this and here I provide you with 3 options, going from my LEAST to MOST favorite.

Option 1: Your PCs are Special.

This is my least favorite option, mainly because it’s a copout. But, it still works just as well as any other option. To the question of “Why can everyone speak Common?” just say that members of your Party are a unique case. They all happen to learn Common and that’s what allowed them to meet up and become friends. Others in the game world won’t be as multilingual.

Option 2: It’s Like English.

So in the IRL world, there are some languages that are shared inter-culturally. English is our prime example. Due to Britains love of colonies, a lot of nations have been exposed to Queen’s English. Its popularity in media through Hollywood has further cemented the language as the most commonly used language on Earth. If D&D was set here, in our real world, it’s likely Common would be the English language.

This is the most COMMONLY (pun intended) accepted answer. Just as with English IRL, you can find Common speakers in almost every country, although some have less than others. This is a perfectly fine solution, and if you use it than bully for you. BUT... 

I think this is a bit too basic for our fantasy setting. And we also need to remember: with D&D we aren’t really talking about different ETHNICITIES that can trace their history back to common ancestors. We are talking about altogether DIFFERENT creatures, who discovered their native language PURELY on their own, before coming together in the Material Plane. So, may I present...

Option 3: The Parasite of Language.

We are in a fantasy setting yes? We have gods, demons, devils, aliens, ghosts, and a fuck ton of other weird things in our setting. So, may I suggest one more weird thing to toss in your games: the Language Virus.

Suppose EVERYONE in your world speaks Common. Or at least every sentient creature. Why? No language can naturally expand to such limitations. And you’re right. None can. What CAN expand to such limitations is a virus. A tiny, microscopic creature that spreads by any means you want, from one creature to another. Upon infecting someone, it has no negative effect really. It’s primarily harmless, which is why it hasn’t been dealt with. BUT!!! by infecting a body it gains access to the mind. Here, it develops a way to communicate with its fellow viruses on OTHER bodies. 

Since the virus is a very basic organism, the communication method developed is always the same, perhaps only slightly affected by the languages the carrier creature knew in life. Thus the Common language is less a creation of one culture, but rather a viral infection, spread across the globe that inadvertently allows living things to communicate with one another. 

So did I sell you on my ideas for Common language?

How do you implement/explain away the Common language in your games?

Would you wanna see more stuff from me about language?

I’d love to hear what feedback you guys got. There’s nothing more fun than reading your interesting ideas for how to run a good game world. I hope my post was an entertaining read. Until next time...

The Unfair DM 

[alinaastarkov]

Honestly, like ... it's funny cause I actually liked Sophie before Season 8 aired, because I wasn't paying that much attention to her and her behavior outside the show, you know? Other than Emilia and Kit's interviews I wasn't really following the any of the actors outside of the show. But after the finale aired and everything exploded and fell to pieces, it was like a magnifying glass was put on all of them for me. And then I saw the shit Sophie had been saying for YEARS. (1/?)

Like how it wouldn't be fair if Daenerys got the iron throne because she had dragons, that Daenerys couldn't have EvErYtHiNg - as if she was personally affronted that Daenerys was so popular. And it was the same with Arya! She was constantly saying Sansa was the best character (and like, ok, a lot of actors probably say that about their characters, fine), but also going on about how 'smart' Sansa was and complaining that she wasn't as popular as other female characters (2/?) because she didn't 'act like a man'. 

Thank you so much for this long ask! To keep things organised, I am roughly going to answer this in sections.

I agree with you. I did not pay much attention to any of the cast really, and I’m still not hugely bothered about them. GOT is done and I rarely get invested in cast members. It’s characters I’m interested in. But I remember randomly coming across bts footage of the Jon/Arya hug from season 1, and I just fell in love with those two actors in particular, and I happened to see an interview with Emilia and adored her too. And that’s when I happened to see more of this cast and understand what they were like. But with the final season, and seeing pretty much everyone’s reactions that ranged from forced awkward laughter to straight up saying it sucked, it became incredibly obvious when any single person reacted positively. Even former cast members were saying it sucked, and celebrities not even involved were dragging it, so Sophie’s words on this topic (which I will touch on in a second) were put under a microscope, and subsequently everything she had said before was too. Her hatred for Dany was definitely fed to her by D&D, but there was definitely a jealousy about how other characters and actors were more popular than her. But her comments about female characters in general were so toxic.

I was even annoyed for a hot minute with Maisie too, because of all the shit she and Sophie said about Daenerys while promoting S8 (calling her power-hungry and saying she was worse than Cersei). BUT THEN. I noticed exactly what you said in an earlier post about Maisie going along with WHATEVER Sophie said. And when I re-watched those interviews it was always SOPHIE saying those shitty things, and Maisie just agreeing. (3/?) I even saw the interview you mentioned where Maisie kept changing her answers to match Sophie's. They're friendship comes off as really uneven and toxic, tbh, cause it felt like Sophie was CONSTANTLY running roughshod over Maisie.

Yeah, Maisie’s attitude initially seems off as well, especially with regard to Daenerys. But as you said, she never says this sort of thing in solo interviews, or interviews with other actors. It’s such a shame that there are so few without Sophie, so we rarely get to see what she’s like on her own. It would be one thing I suppose if Maisie gave similar answers to Sophie without much prompting, but she always has one answer, then Sophie speaks, and she changes it based on what she says. That really clearly shows you she is amending her behaviour to fit in with Sophie, which is not good. It does feel so uneven and I’ve had friendships like that and it took a while for me to cut them out. Once I did I felt much better. We obviously don’t know the ins and outs of their relationship, but it does feel very similar.

Sophie's also made uncomfortable comments dealing with racism in the past, she claims to be an advocate for mental health but then behaves abominably towards her castmates (4/?) (making insensitive comments about Kit's drinking during an interview, saying shit about Daenerys when she knows how much that could affect Emilia, etc.), the way she said she "loved" Sansa's rape scene because of how twisted it was, all that in addition to how she defended the show's final season (with it's STRONG xenophobic, isolationist undertones) even though she didn't even watch the last 2-3 episodes (5/?) - how she seemed so smug and happy about the (tone-deaf) ending, even seemed to be celebrating it when it was brought up in interviews (talk about not being able to read the room - seriously, everybody else seemed to realize it, and kept their mouths shut after the required promo period) - her history of sicking her fans on people who disliked Sansa/said anything negative about her on social media even when they didn't @ her (6/?) 

Her comments about race and mental health always made me uncomfortable too. I was sympathetic to her struggle with mental health, but then she invalidates everyone else’s struggles and it just made me dislike her even more. You can’t be an advocate for mental health and then say stuff like that about other people. Those two things do not go together. You could see when she said that stuff about Kit’s drinking that, though the audience laughed, everyone in the cast including Kit gave awkward smiles and giggles to cover how uncomfortable they were because they didn’t want to make a scene. And the way she talks about other characters is disrespectful. These characters mean a lot to the people who play them, and she does not react well when people give the same back to her. It reminds of John Boyega and his comments about Reylo and Ben Solo especially, knowing how much his castmates, Adam and Daisy in particular, love the character and how much he means to them, and he went ahead and said those things anyway, fuelling his fans to be cruel to other fans. It’s not as bad as Sophie perhaps, but it’s just poor form when these people are supposed to be professional. Sophie’s comments about Sansa’s rape scene came straight from D&D’s mouth, but she has to be at least a little self-aware about how that sounds and how gross it is, especially when she loves it because of how gross it was. You don’t see Emilia defending Drogo, do you?

Her reaction to the ending was so telling because it was the single positive opinion in a sea of negativity. Everyone else, including people no longer in the show and celebrities who were never involved, hated it and called it out to varying degrees (there was still contracts to fulfill) for how tone-deaf and nonsensical it was, and there was the table-read were everyone was devastated, but Sophie was grinning the entire time. She liked the show because her character won in the end. Sophie is not a writer, and it’s obvious when she praises the writing of this show (and criticises others which had far fewer problems than this). She did not care how nonsensical and crass the rest of the show was, as long as her character ended up on top, and then went out of her way to criticise people who hated it. Other actors have done the same, but on top of everything else it’s not a good look. And don’t even get me started on her behaviour on social media. It’s gross and not something we can blame on someone else.

after all that, everything about her just reeks of this 'woe-is-me I'm so oppressed white feminist' bs. It makes it impossible for me to like her now. Like, I think I'm only 1-2 years older than her, I don't come from nearly as much privilege as she does, and she has all the resources in the world to be educating herself and improving herself but...I don't see anything resembling that kind of growth in her. (7/7)

Yeah I can only agree. I’m five years younger than her and you would never catch me acting the way she does. She’s 24, she’s an adult, and obviously early fame and the producers affected her, but at some point we can’t keep absolving her of blame. She could be educating herself and alleviating her own ignorance, but it seems like she’s just doubling down. Maisie has had the same troubling influence from an earlier age, and she is younger, but she is not acting this way. I’m not hugely into following actors’ lives as I said, but when this was brought to my attention it rubbed me the wrong way. I am perfectly fine to ignore her as best I can, but I don’t have to like her. You don’t have to like celebrities if they’re not great people, and I don’t like her. And I’m glad the show is over so her castmates can go on to bigger and better things and leave that toxic environment the show created behind.

[felassan]

if it's not too much to ask, which of the characters introduced in tevinter nights do you think have "potential companion energy" and why?

Not at all! It’s just feelings I get mind. Cut for length and obviously there’s spoilers under there.

One is Strife. This is partially wishful thinking on my part, but not completely. He’s both City and Dalish, bringing knowledge of both perspectives in one slot. He’s an example of City-Dalish solidarity/working together, which I think we need more of, especially in the face of what’s coming. I can’t see him not wanting to improve the lives of the remaining City Elves, and I’ve said before I’m in desperate need of a modern elf who is FOR!! modern elves as a whole, not other or semi-related groups like slaves and the little people (which are absolutely worthy causes, just not the thing I mean). Members of both elf factions are followers of Solas, I’d like for members of both these factions to be represented among our companions/followers/agents as well. He’s older (and not in a “I’m an immortal ancient being” way), which we haven’t had before in an elf dude companion or indeed in any elf companion before. He’s explicitly pro-Dalish, as in how they are in the present, and is proud of being Dalish/an elf which is a perspective we’ll be sorely in need of on the companion roster in the next game (like if it’s lacking in this I will be frustrated. It was already lacking in DAI which I think is a game that really needed it). He’s “elfy”; we haven’t had an “elfy-elf” male companion. He seems happy with his new Dalish life and has good relationships with his clanmates. He’s also not a Dalish exile. Love Merrill and Velanna, but wouldn’t it be nice if we had a Dalish companion who wasn’t an outcast with a strained relationship with their clan? Give me examples of that BioWare. He’s not explicitly attached, like Irian. Not that his single-ness matters (this comment isn’t in terms of availability as an LI) or that having an SO precludes someone from being a companion. But for example, Irian also has Big Energy, but I think it’s probably a bit harder/less convenient to write a companion who has an active SO with whom they have a close, healthy and current relationship with elsewhere? Oghren was kinda estranged from both Branka and Felsi in those games, and Aveline and Donnic, while lovely and wholesome, was player-choice dependent and not from the very outset of the game. The love between Viv and Bastien was real, but he dies in the game. Strife is also not an isolationist-Dalish - he and his clanmates are clearly interested in and troubled by the current events unfolding in the wider world, worried about how it will effect/what it will mean for the Dalish, and wanting to keep an eye on it, to the extent that they launch an intrepid covert mission to infiltrate a Vint city while it was the middle of being invaded by Qunari (dangerous!!) to steal info on the Qunari plans. “Clans” implies multi-clan cooperation which I’m interested in, and there’s your motivation - Strife is clearly interested in doing dangerous things in order to protect his People, even if that involves being away from his clan. You could easily turn that into “I’m going to help the DA4 PC stop Solas, because I want to protect my People [and again, for him this = City and Dalish both, potentially saving another slot from needing filled/represented]”. He also has Felassan-style energy and I think quite a few folk are interested in having an elven companion like that. And he’s cool, with his height and silver hair.

He has a notable snappy name and gets a lot of spotlight in that short I feel, and that’s a prominent place to have, in the opening story to boot. The language describing him is consistently complimentary. His role in the story is heroic. And he’s clearly super-skilled/competent! Just from memory, he’s intelligent/smart/a quick thinker, strong and sturdy and spry, a decent hand-to-hand fighter, is able to infiltrate a Vint city, a great archer, light-footed, an agile tree-climber, brave, possesses elfy-knowledge, is open to changing his mind/new perspectives (character development), knows some elven, can navigate in the woods, etc. He’s also fairly sassy which is generally always welcome in companions.

I got the biggest companion energy from Lucanis though. I’m less interested in having him and therefore another Crow as a companion (no offense to my boy Zev, it’s just something that’s been done before), but he is pretty cool/interesting and his story really seemed to idk like.. talk him up. He’s obviously a skilled combatant as an expert Crow, one whose reputation proceeds him and whom others/those he is hunting are largely super afraid of/concerned about. Literally evil powerful Magisters cower in fear at his name, and he’s a lowly foreign non-mage! They’ve started calling him “The Demon”, that’s how afraid of his prowess and him coming for them they are! Heck in this short alone his recent body count starts at 9 Venatori (and that’s just his recent contracts) and he ends it having killed like, 8 guards, 1 Magister and inadvertently like 40 decadent slave-having-approving Venatori-supporting/sympathetic partygoers!! He’s clearly intelligent and smart, agile stealthy and resourceful, has keen senses. He’s visually striking, lean, dark hair, umber eyes, basically sounding dangerously handsome in a rugged sort of way, and wears a badass Designated Cool Guy black leather greatcoat. “Focused and intense - the kind of man you couldn’t look away from. Until he looked at you.” Arsenal of daggers and throwing knives. He seems like he was made with “attractively brooding” in mind lol. Quiet bad boy with a heart kinda deal. This isn’t a crit or saying he’s one-note or one-dimensional, not so, he has a lot of character for a character in a short story. He’s uniquely-skilled for a non-mage, with these instincts he’s developed - able to feel magic energy and tell when the Veil is thin or when there’s tears in it/mages are pulling across it. He also seems to have some knowledge of Veil/artifacts/demon/mage/red lyrium/magic stuff, more than you’d expect from a random non-mage normie Thedosian. Despite being a Crow he’s very different to Zevran, so it wouldn’t be a duplicate situation. Despite being a gruff killer and stuff, he had a lot of emotional depth like. He’s written sympathetically - he has standards (e.g. no red lyrium), a soft heart which he tries to hide even from his cousin, and which his enemies i.e. remaining Venatori know they might be able to exploit (his kind treatment of Effe, risking things to free the Magister’s slaves, ending the suffering of the experimented-on people and allowing them to take vengeance), and espouses stuff the fanbase just devooours, like loving killing racist evil supremacist Magisters. “[I LOVE] killing racist blood mages who have it coming”, lol! He’s the Great Lucanis, no Ordinary Crow, Master Dellamorte. In contrast to his sassier, chattier, more “lolol” and dramatic cousin, he’s the ‘straight’ man, but still has that dry/wry wit/sense of humor thing going on people are suckers for (again not a crit). His marks all have a gleam in their eyes that show they’re evil (i.e. they deserve it and showing he usually only takes such contracts), he thinks ignorance is not innocence. He says cool badass stuff. He’s like a bingo-board of all the things people love. He does the brooding “we’re not freedom fighters, I know what I am, I’m a killer” thing, but you get the distinct impression that he’s not just that. The Magister’s obscene cruelty makes him rage. He’s like a mashup of Thane (custom-designed to be an LI) and Ezio (a very popular character). Important to note that his brooding is really mild, not at all annoying, not overdone, which are common crits of such chars. AH! He’s like Antivan Batman lol.

Seems like he’d have interesting stories to tell. He’s noted to be more widely travelled than his cousin. His orientation hasn’t been specified so there’s wiggle-room. The return to being hero protector freedom-fighters rather than what they are right now thing for the Crows is hinted at for at least some parts of the Crows in the 8 Talon story. Lucanis’ relationship with his cousin and gran, and the issue of the First Talon succession/his grandmother would be a perfect loyalty/personal mission/arc and in general are really interesting. He admits that it’s impossible to refuse his gran, only prolong her. I can imagine exploring his feelings about his grandma and the life she made him live in order to become strong. Is he really ok with that history? Does he not share his cousin’s bitterness? His cousin is like how long are you going to keep doing this, our gran’s bidding? His cousin also offers that if he was First Talon, he’d let Lucanis quit and be free. I can imagine the peeling away his layers stuff and the “you’re not just a killer” “your calling is more than death bro!” char arc. His anti-Venatori crusade is not complete, and the story ends with setting up his clearly insanely cruel/evil enemy Magister Renata - unfinished business much. If the plot of DA4 has a route the remaining Venatori arc, he could show up and fit right in. There’s your motivation-y stuff. The Crows are prominent in the book and seem like they will be prominent in the next game (Antiva’s only line of defense against the Antaam invasion), and this guy is a high-ranking Crow related to Queen Crow. If it turns out his mysterious hirer for the Venatori jobs was Solas/a Solas follower, there’s potential for the little “aw shit” reveal. 

I would like Teia to show up in a Briala-esque role. She’s amazing but I don’t want to separate her from her cute, finally!! newly-budding close romantic relationship with Viago.

[msg refs this post]  warning, Tevinter Nights spoilers at link

[funkymbtifiction]

Hi Charity!

I think, I need a little help with my enneagram. I believe myself to be an enfp 471 sx/so, although I thought a whole lot about being so/sx I eventually came to the conclusion that my sx is way more evident than my so.

The problem is that I’m not quite sure if I’m a 4w5 or 4w3. I mainly get 4w5 in the tests I take and my best friend, who’s a 5w4, sais she can see more 5 than 3 tendencies. I’m just a bit unsure, because all the 4w5s I’ve come across in my research seemed very mellow and stoic, and while I do act like that whenever a topic of interest comes up, I also can be perceived as quite bubbly from time to time. I wonder if that stems from my issues from my mental health or if that’s an indicator that I could be 741 after all?

Thank you so much!

Tritype shouldn’t be considered until you are positive of your core, and even then I’m not sure it actually exists (I waffle, but your core/wing/social variant stacking really does ‘account for everything’ when you have the right one).

If you could only have one Enneagram number that explains EVERYTHING about your usual tactics… which would it be, 4 or 7? A lot of people mistype as 4 because they are just going “sure, I want to be special,” but they don’t identify with the core ‘sin’ of the 4 which is – I want to wallow in my misery, and don’t you dare fix me; I am broken, and unless I am broken, I am unimportant. Fixing me, and my tragic circumstances, would mean I am no longer broken, ergo… no longer valuable. For a 4, their art is how they work through their complex feelings. You are indeed correct that 4w5s tend to be melancholy – they are the Mary Shelleys and Tim Burtons of the world. All their art carries a theme of… abandonment, alienation, and brokenness! The weirdo nobody understands. For a 4, their art is ‘personal’ and symbolic of themselves. 4 dwells, and 5 wings retreat into learning things or homebody distractions to avoid going out into the world and taking risks (“Instead of trying to market my book, I’m gonna work on the sequel!” <- every 5 wing NFP writer I know, including myself, lol).

This is not at all like the optimistic, energetic, ‘more is what I want’ 7 who has a can-do, optimistic, sunny attitude that goes naturally with Ne-dom “it’ll all turn out okay :)” idealism. 7s run away from their problems by avoiding them, justifying them through mental arguments (evasion, misdirection, convincing you with charm, anything to avoid admitting they were wrong / selfish, etc) and depending on their wing, retreating into anxiety (6) or aggression (8).

Read through both numbers, in as many books and variations as you can find, until one of them kicks you right between the eyes. That’s your core. A number on one side of it is going to also kick you between the eyes. That’s your wing. If it’s all sunshine and rainbows and “my type is so kewl” and no major “oh my god, that’s how I screw up my life and self-sabotage every day!” … you either are not admitting to what shame / avoidance / fears are driving you, or you have the wrong number. You should be able to look back at your life, once you ‘get it,’ and suddenly understand WHY you did everything you did – which avoidance tactics you were using to do it, and how it’s caused problems in your relationships.

I read a random comment about Enneagram this morning that made me smile but was also true – Enneagram is about how you screw things up!! Do you screw things up because you are using 7 deflection tactics or 4 tactics?

For the record, most ENFP actual 4s have 3 wings; a lot of INFP 4s have 5 wings, since Ne-doms are more extroverted and less isolationist / avoidant.

- ENFP Mod