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iwritefandomimagines · 1 year

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NO LONGER IN DENIAL

masterlist

pairing: anthony bridgerton x reader, bestfriend!benedict bridgerton x reader

description: anthony has made no secret of not wanting to marry, despite it being more than clear that he is head over heels in love with you, his “best friend”. benedict decides he is fed up of anthony’s denial, and takes matters into his own hands — by inciting jealousy from his older brother.

warnings: angst, jealous!anthony cos i’m a sucker for him hehe, benedict being a shit stirrer who i adore, fluffiness at the end <3

“Lady Y/N is joining us for dinner this evening, I believe,” Benedict hummed, a small smirk gracing his face as the eldest Bridgerton’s head snapped up, “Mother told me she hopes to, anyway.”

Anthony watched as his sisters fussed excitedly over seeing you, for it had been at least a week since you had graced Aubrey Hall with your presence and they missed you dearly.

Anthony had too, of course, though he’d never admit it was for any reason beyond how highly regarded you were in his family and how much he enjoyed your friendship.

“I very much look forward to seeing her,” Benedict continued, still smirking devilishly, “Though I did have the pleasure of bumping into her as she left Modiste yesterday.”

Anthony furrowed his eyebrows at his brother, “You didn’t tell me that, brother.”

“Must I share every occasion I see Lady Y/N with you, Anthony?” he quipped in reply, crossing his arms over his chest as Colin stifled a laugh, well aware of what was going on, “One might think you jealous.”

“Jealous? You jest, brother. She is my closest friend, I am simply surprised you would not mention even in passing that you saw her,” Anthony spoke through gritted teeth, “Regardless, I look forward to seeing her.”

“Ah, perfect timing!” Francesca grinned as Lady Y/N’s arrival was announced moments later, and in you walked with a gloriously bright smile on your face, though this faltered as you saw the bitter look on Anthony’s face.

“Is everything alright, my Lord?” you asked shyly, taking a few steps towards Anthony, whose expression softened at this, “Have we chosen a bad day to visit? If so I apologise—,”

Suddenly Benedict was at your side now, “It’s quite alright, my dear Lady Y/N. We are all pleased to see you. Might we take a turn about the room? We have some things to discuss!”

“No fair! You saw her yesterday, I want to show her my embroidery,” Hyacinth pouted, though Benedict raised his brow at her and flickered his eyes in Anthony’s direction as if to explain his actions.

Everyone in the family was well aware of the affection shared between you and Anthony, even if he dared not admit how he felt because of his apparent desire not to marry.

Benedict believed he just needed a push to see that you had myriad other options, and that he could only push away his feelings for so long.

“I’m sure Benedict has something important to share, my dear Hyacinth, but I would love to see your embroidery promptly after,” your voice was like honey to the eldest Bridgerton, who fought off the desire to make his own request for a moment of your time, “There is enough of me to go around! My brother will be arriving shortly, also.”

Benedict began whispering almost as soon as you had crossed the room, endeavouring to make you well aware of his plan so as not to cause any discomfort to you.

He didn’t wish for you to be confused by his sudden flirtation, so immediately indulged you with the details of his concocted plan to induce jealousy in his older brother that might finally allow him to be honest about his feelings.

With some hesitation, you accepted his plan.

Benedict was well aware of your feelings for his brother, and you knew this — after all, you had confessed it to him yourself because you trusted him dearly. Much to Anthony’s dismay, nowadays Benedict was your closest friend of all.

Anthony had once filled that role, but as each year passed and your youth slipped away, you had fallen far too in love with him to be so satisfied with a friendship as you were with Benedict.

Benedict was your best friend — Anthony was the love of your life.

Though he did not admit it, you were the love of his too. This is why Benedict’s interference was so necessary as far as the second Bridgerton son was concerned.

It was unfair for you to believe your love unrequited when it was merely his stubborn refusal to see beyond his ‘duty’ as Viscount and head of the household that prevented him from giving in to his feelings.

The plan seemed already to be working by the time you were seated for dinner, far closer to Benedict than to Anthony who sat at the other side of the table.

He scowled as he watched his brother gossiping with you, still irritated by both his earlier remark about seeing you yesterday and his persistence with being the only person in the room to maintain your attention.

“It is working, my dear friend,” Benedict beamed across at you, leaning forward to both better execute his plan and so that you could hear him better, “If looks could kill, my brother would have seen me long since dead and buried.”

You brought your hand to your mouth, hiding the giggle that escaped as you waited to calm before looking across at Anthony, “Benedict!”

You drew in a deep breath, composing yourself before glancing across at the Viscount and catching his eye immediately. His glare was suddenly no more, his lips curling up in a smile that sent your heart racing.

You mouthed a small “Hello,” to him, blushing crimson at the intensity of his stare. Despite the conversation going on around him, all he could do was look at you.

The staring contest you seemed to find yourself in was swiftly broken by Benedict’s voice calling your name again, returning you to conversation with him.

The rest of dinner passed much the same — small conversations here and there with the other Bridgertons, longing stares from an increasingly restless Anthony, and teasing comments from Benedict, who was certain that Anthony would be confronting you tonight.

“We should probably call for our carriage, I suppose,” you smiled sadly, disappointed with both how quickly the night had passed by and the fact you’d hardly spoken to Anthony throughout, “I’ve had such a lovely evening. I only wish I could stay longer!”

“You could!” Anthony exclaimed, an unusual outburst for the eldest sibling but one that made all at the table laugh as he rose to his feet, “We could have a room put up for you. It is late, and Wellsbury Hall is quite the distance.”

You bit your lip, smiling at him as he sat back down again, “Oh we couldn’t trouble you with that, my lord.”

“Perhaps my dear friend is right,” your brother disagreed, “It is getting late, and if it is no trouble we would be incredibly grateful. And I hope we might repay you with an invitation to Wellsbury in the near future? I hope to host a ball before the season ends so that my darling sister might finally find a husband.”

His eyes flickered between Benedict and Anthony for a moment and you realised that he must have been in on Benedict’s little plan.

You looked around the room cautiously at every smiling face, before settling your gaze on Anthony with a nod, “Very well then. I’d be delighted. The many childhoods spent staying here overnight are often much missed.”

Lady Bridgerton grinned, “Fantastic. Then it is settled,” she turned to the maids stood by the door, “Please prepare two rooms for our guests as quickly as possible. It is, after all, late, and I’m sure they will soon wish to rest.”

The way Anthony watched you for the rest of dinner made you impossibly nervous.

When the maids told you which rooms were readied, you stood to retire to bed, but not before Benedict offered to show you to the room as it was in his opinion the best decorated.

“Brother, I don’t believe it’s appropriate for you to show Lady Y/N to her room,” Anthony huffed, having had enough now of him being stuck to you like heavy-duty glue, “Perhaps you should allow one of our maids to kindly do so.”

“It is quite alright, Anthony. We are in the comfort of our own home, and I know Y/N quite well enough,” Benedict sing-songed, “Unless you would prefer to show her? The maids are quite busy clearing up.”

Anthony’s jaw clenched at his brother’s comment about knowing you ‘quite well enough’ and so he found himself at your side quickly.

“In fact yes, perhaps I should,” he agreed, a sternness in his tone you’d become used to again today. He was so much gentler with you, but today with you so seemingly far from him he has grown stoic again, “After all, I am the head of this household and you have not let me spend a minute with my closest friend, hm?”

Colin interjected now, aware of all eyes on the conversation, “Perhaps Lady Y/N can make the decision herself?”

“I—,”

“Fine, I concede,” Benedict raised his hands in surrender, “I suppose I’ve not let her leave my side this evening, though you cannot fault me for that. I will bid you goodnight, Y/N. Goodnight brothers.”

He took your hand in his, lifting it to his lips for just the gentlest of kisses to the back of it, before he bowed and quickly left the room.

With Anthony facing the other way, towards you, Benedict turned to shoot you a wink before leaving, and nerves bubbled in your gut at the unknown of what was to come.

The kiss to your hand was the final straw for Anthony, who linked his arm with yours and lead you out of the room without another word to anyone else.

You were silent for the walk, but once you stopped still outside of the room you were to sleep in Anthony turned to stand in front of you, his breathing jagged as his eyes searched your face for clues to why he was feeling so furious at your friendship with Benedict.

“Is my brother courting you?” he came right out and asked it, his chest heaving and yours doing so now too as you shook your head.

“Not at all, my lord,” you bit your lip again, before looking down at the ground to avoid his gaze.

He brought his index finger to your chin, lifting your face so that you were forced to look at him again, “And do you wish him to be?”

Again you shook your head, but his finger never left your skin for a moment.

“I was so sure—,”

“Forgive me, my lord, I have just been finding comfort in his friendship of late as I see him regularly about town,” you frowned, suddenly even more conscious of how little time you spent with Anthony in recent weeks.

He leaned ever so slightly closer, “Finding comfort in his friendship? And what of ours?”

“Our friendship, my lord? I—,”

“I apologise, Y/N, but I do not like to see you so close with my brother. Not least because of the fear of a scandal if others saw his behaviour,” he gritted his teeth, “He touches you too often. Leans too close to speak with you and it… it is misleading.”

You gulped, “Why would you be so infuriated by the notion of him courting me, my dear Anthony? He is your brother, and he cares for me. Even if it is not him I wish did so.”

He cocked his head in confusion now, before his eyes widened in realisation of his brother’s scheming. And in considering that, he realised that it had worked.

He’d never wanted to marry, and especially never for love.

But with you stood right there at his finger tips, smiling up at him nervously with a twinkle in your eyes, he threw caution to the wind and realised that you had changed that in him.

He could no longer deny his desire to hold you, to have you entirely as his, to make you his Viscountess.

“Who do you wish to treat you as such, my lady?”

“Surely you can see the answer for yourself, Anthony.”

“I simply wish to hear you say it. But if I must do so first, as a consequence of my foolishness in not seeing it sooner, then so be it. I dislike your closeness to my brother because I miss your attention being mine. I wish to have you at my side always, to laugh with you and dance with you and just talk with you all evening. I do not wish to see Benedict court you because I wish to do so myself.”

“Anthony—,”

“Please, my love, let me finish. I have most probably been in love with you for as long as I have known you, and yet chosen not to see it out of my own stubbornness. If not for my scheming devil of a brother, I might still be in denial. But I love you most ardently, Y/N. And if you feel at all the same then I should like to make you my wife. My viscountess.”

You were speechless, perhaps for one of the first times since meeting Anthony.

You had always told him everything, always saved your last dance for him at balls, always rooted for him in every game of Pall Mall even as his competitor.

And now here he was, the famously anti-marriage Viscount asking if you too wished to wed him.

“Anthony, I had hoped it was clear as day that I too have been unfathomably in love with you for longer than I can explain,” you blushed crimson again under his gaze as a smile spread across his face, “To marry you, well, would be the only way I might find joy in marriage. I know you’ve never sought a match, let alone a love match, but I love you most dearly, my dear Anthony.”

He captured your lips with his as soon as you stopped speaking, knowing that he shouldn’t do so but hoping nobody was around.

Besides, he would soon make you his wife, and he couldn’t contain the excitement.

“I know I’ve previously had my reservations but I am no longer in denial, and I’m sorry for taking my liberties with you by kissing you before we are wed but I could not help myself. And I wish to spend a lifetime kissing you, Y/N. Will you marry me?” he looked shy all of a sudden, which you had never seen before, and you grabbed both of his hands in yours to kiss them.

“Of course, my dear, there is nothing I would like more!”

His smile became impossibly wide, and once more he kissed you out of sheer excitement.

“I’m sorry that this was so abrupt, and I have yet no ring. But my mother will be ecstatic and I plan to give you her betrothal ring because— you are the only woman worthy. And I shall spend our whole life ensuring that I make up for taking so long to do this,” he was vulnerable now, still shy under your careful gaze,

“I had no desire to marry because I had no desire to put the woman I love through the pain of losing me like my mother did my father. She was distraught but— I see now that it is no good wasting time with this fear. However long I might live, I wish to spend those years loving you and making you happy, so that any pain might be worthwhile.”

You kissed him now, tearing your gloves from your hands and reaching up to cup his face and kiss him, “I love you, Anthony Bridgerton. Always. And I cannot wait to be your wife. It will be the greatest honour.”

You were both hot and flustered, and it was taking everything in him not to push open your bedroom door and sweep you off your feet.

But for you, he was a gentleman, and so he settled for one final kiss atop your head and a sweet goodnight.

“We shall tell the others as we break fast tomorrow, perhaps?” you could see the dizzy joy in Anthony’s eyes as he asked this of you, and you nodded profusely.

“I cannot wait, my dear.”

“Then I will bid you good night, my love. I will dream of you, and look forward to seeing you in the morning. Sleep well, my future viscountess.”

“Sleep well, my love.”

As you went to part, you heard a rustle a little way down the corridor, both looking up to see a smug Benedict smirking, leaning on the wall just down the hallway.

“Even I underestimated my own plan. Congratulations, brother. You finally saw sense.”

———

hello! i know this is completely random as i’ve been writing for djats lately but i has this idea and felt the neeeeed to write it. feel free to request more bridgerton fics, as i’m inspired at the moment and rewatching it.

in the meantime, here is my masterlist!

#bridgerton #anthony bridgerton x reader jealous #anthony bridgerton #anthony bridgerton x reader #benedict bridgerton #bridgerton imagine #anthony bridgerton imagine #anthony bridgerton one shot #jealous #jealous anthony bridgerton

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sweet-as-an-angel · 11 months

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Miguel’s Reaction to You Calling Him a DILF

Warnings: Implied Smut, Dominant Miguel, Profanity, Use of ‘Daddy’, Lyla Trying Her Best <3, Fem Reader.

Despite spending every day with Lyla, an absolutely chronically online AI, Miguel knows little in the way of internet jargon.

Thus, this term - DILF - is one he’s never come across before. Namely because Lyla has never seen it fit to implement it into a conversation.

But, when Miguel overheard you calling him your “Favourite DILF; just a gorgeous, scrumptious specimen,” he had to ask Lyla to translate for him.

Miguel swore he could see her eyes widen, her brow stiffen and crease.

“It’s…it’s — uh — well…”

Lyla scratched the back of her head, her stare sloping off to the side — away from Miguel’s cattish stare. Her teeth gritted, a gateway, a preventative measure to ensure your safety and wellbeing. The only barrier between your open secret and miguel’s discovery of it.

“Oh, come on, Lyla,” Miguel crossed his arms over his chest, as if to inhibit the anxiety starting to bloom there. He doubted that you’d ever bad-mouth him, especially given how close the two of you were, but Lyla’s apprehension was starting to spark some doubts. Regardless, he persevered, kept his stare hard and neutral. “It can’t be that bad.”

“It..it means…” Lyla sighed, pinched the bridge of her nose beneath her glasses. She didn’t look up at Miguel, instead finding you in her mind’s eye and cursing you. And wishing the best for your safety.

“Dad I’d like to fuck.”

She came out with it, the words almost poisonous and sour on her tongue as they passed through. And the fact that she’d had to say them to Miguel of all people didn’t help.

At first, Miguel didn’t think he’d heard Lyla correctly, his posture and face remaining unchanged in the fallout of his discovery.

It was only after three seconds passed, four, five, that he truly heard — understood — what Lyla had said.

“Oh.”

A warmth bled across Miguel’s face, a creeping blush hidden only by the console’s yellow hue. Without another word, Mifuel turned tail, unfurling his arms, unravelling to his broadest potential. He began his descent, his destination clear as day in his mind’s eye.

Lyla’s’s eyes widened further, almost bulging from her head. She called, stammering: “(Y-Y/N) probably didn’t mean it! Not like that! So-so don’t go too hard on ‘er, okay?”

Miguel searched the entire facility for you, his face a concoction of emotions nobody (save for yourself) had ever seen before, thus making his mood indecipherable to all that were not you.

He eventually found you, isolated, in a room. Practically begging for what was to come next. He slipped inside, closed the door behind him.

You turned and smiled, sensing Miguel’s presence; the impression of authority.

“Hey, Miggy!” you chimed, eyes crescents. You turned back to checking off your stock list, paying little heed to the shadow advancing on you.

“Playing innocent, I see,” Miguel’s voice swooped and glided as the greatest bird of prey does, coming to stand mere centimetres behind you, his warmth at your back; a dark sun.

“I thought you’d be at home, caring for our child.” His hands came to sit on your shoulders, heavy and large. For a second, you were befuddled, believing Miguel to be spinning you a riddle. Then, realisation. Your heart dropped; you knew Miguel could feel it. Oh my God, Lyla.

“We…don’t have a child, Miguel,” you laughed, humourless and breathy. You knew you had to play your cards right. Carefully. Miguel gave a heavy, brief chuckle.

“Not yet,” he squeezed your shoulders, hands slipping down the length of your arms, the feeling of spiders creeping along your skin. “But seeing as you’re so keen on calling me daddy, I see no harm in pretending.”

His lips came to your neck, pressing deceptively soft kisses there.

You were frozen, though a fire stoked within you. One you couldn’t bring yourself to put out.

“After all, I am your DILF, aren’t I?”

You bit your lip, eyes squeezing shut as Miguel’s hands slid to your waist, pulling your back to his front where you felt something thick and large and bulging against your tailbone.

“A baseless accusation, don’t you think ?”

Your breath shuttered. “I didn’t mean it as a bad thing—“

“It doesn’t matter how you meant it. What matters is it’s inaccurate,” Miguel spoke with a stoic logic you’d seen one too many times. He pulled you to him, tighter, closer, his heart pounding against your back.

“But, luckily for you, I’m in a giving mood. I’m not going to punish you for your little transgression. Instead, I’m going to give you an out.” He descended upon your skin again, nipping it between his blunted teeth, the threat of his fangs in your periphery.

“What…what’s that?” You almost didn’t want to ask, your heart creeping up your throat as if to muffle your words.

Miguel’s hand slipped from your waist, sliding sharp fingers down the expanse of your back, leaving trails of goosebumps. You felt his hand come between where the most prominent part of himself and you connected, his knuckles digging into the small of your back. He ran a hand over himself through his suit, palmed himself. His eye twitched. “You just have to be a good girl and lay down and take whatever I give you until I say we’re done.”

His grip on you tightened. You could feel how dark his gaze had become, weighing heavy on you like a robe.

You said nothing – could say nothing.

“Now, you wanna say that again,” his voice was muffled by your skin, his kisses becoming wetter, languid. He pushed himself against you, taking you by the hips and pulling you so he caught you just right. You spied his eye twitch in the reflection of the filing cabinet across from you as you cracked an eye open, a steady redness overtaking Miguel’s stare, his lips turning up at the corners, revealing his fangs.

“Or are you gonna keep that pretty little mouth shut and make me into a real daddy ?”

Reblog for more content like this! It helps creators like myself tremendously and it is greatly appreciated :-)

Masterlist Masterpost

Yandere Masterlist Juicy Original Content <3

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rogersideup · 3 months

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｡°✩ ♊︎ The Gemini ♊︎ ✩ °｡

Chapter 3

Expendable

Series Masterlist

Previous part: wine and dine next part: pink peonies

Word Count 5,333

Warnings: My blog is 18+ only. All minors or blogs without an age in bio will be blocked. Minors DNI. Mentions and descriptions of sexual acts.

Standing in front of a human shaped dummy in the private training room, Steve was showing you all the best ways to direct an attack to assure your opponent goes down, and stays down.

After your mission and injury, Steve was out for a few days on a business trip the same day that you were medically cleared to get back to work. So, it had been a while since the last time you trained together.

You both decided it was a good idea to just take it easy and review what you already know as a means of studying for your final evaluation coming up.

Every agent had to take a final evaluation upon completing every single training course shield had to offer. It was a big deal, and though nobody had any doubts that you were ready for it, it could never hurt to review and improve.

"Knock knock, bitches." Bucky announced, causing both of you to stop.

"Hey, Bucky boy" You greeted him.

"What's going on, Buck?" Steve questioned.

"I dunno, I'm bored." He shrugged. "Can I just sit and watch?"

"Don't you have work to do?" You asked with a giggle.

"I finished!" He defended himself. "You two get to spend so much time without me, it's only fair I get to insert myself here whenever I want to."

"You act like this is personal and not us doing our jobs" Steve raised an eyebrow at him.

"That's a technicality I'm choosing to ignore." Bucky sat on the ground with his back against the wall.

Steve looked at you to make sure it was okay that he sat and watched, but he caught something he wished he hadn't. Just for a split second, you narrowed your eyes at Bucky, and he gave you a very subtle nod back.

He realized that it very well could've been nothing, but it definitely seemed like it was something.

Though Steve didn't bring it up at all, he made mental note of it. He was confident in his deep knowledge of both of his friend's behavior, and he was choosing to trust his gut on that observation.

The rest of your time together, Bucky sat and watched quietly, only occasionally responding to conversations that would break out that weren't work related. Towards the end, Steve wanted to confirm some scheduling, so he cut the physical work a few minutes early.

He sat on the bench with you as you pulled a sweatshirt over your head, and your everyday sneakers onto your feet.

"Okay, so, your final evaluation is one week from today." Steve noted. "So this week will be really simple, we can keep doing this, just reviewing what we've already been over. But our training together is still supposed to run until the end of the month so we have three extra weeks together."

"What am I supposed to do when this ends?! I'll be so bored without you!" You exclaimed.

Steve chuckled. "You should be happy that you survived my course!"

"I mean I am, but then what?"

"Maybe another Avenger will take you under their wing." Steve shrugged.

"I can only think of one Avenger with wings" you noted.

"What do you want to cover in the three weeks together after your evaluation?" He asked.

Your lips formed into a pout. "I know what it should be, but I don't wanna do it"

"Restraints?" Steve questioned sympathetically.

"Restraints... I guess." You grumbled.

Every fighter had a weak spot. Just one thing that made their stomachs turn and their hearts race, something that really scared them regardless of mental work or preparation. Some people couldn't handle heights, didn't do very well when they saw blood, and really freaked out over handling certain weapons.

You just happened to be terrified of being restrained, which unfortunately was a very plausible situation to find yourself in as an agent. There was no reason why you were terrified of it, nothing happened in your life to make you fear it as much as you did. But the thought of having your hands or legs tied made you feel claustrophobic in a way you couldn't even describe using words.

"It'll be scary at first, but we'll work on it" Steve reassured. "Wouldn't you rather learn how to get out of any sort of restraint with someone you trust then find yourself in a situation where you're tied up at the hands of an enemy with no way out?"

"Logically yes, but in reality I would like neither of those things to happen." You responded with a twinge of sarcasm.

Steve laughed, "okay well, I wouldn't like that to happen to you either! But once you learn how to escape from a bunch of different scenarios, you won't be scared of it anymore. Knowledge is power!"

"I know you didn't just knowledge is power me, you loser!" You joked with a snort.

"Oh I certainly did, and I'll do it again." He stated with a smile. "Confidently!"

"Okay, I guess I trust you enough to teach me." You committed to the endeavor.

"Good job, pushing yourself is how you grow better as a fighter." Steve praised your bravery. "We'll start with the easiest and work our way up to the hardest, then you'll be such a pro at it that nothing could ever hold you back."

"Yeah, yeah." You playfully rolled your eyes.

"Then after our training together is officially over, I'm going to block off my schedule these same two hours every day to just cry." Steve put a hand over his heart.

"Can you do that to my schedule too? Maybe we can cry together?"

"I'll see what I can do." Steve agreed, before opening his arms up for a hug. You happily hugged him back. "Good job today! You're going to do great on your assessment no matter who is assigned to asses you. We all know it."

"Thanks for teaching me!" You smiled. "In all seriousness, I've really enjoyed getting to learn from you. Thanks for all the time you've put onto me."

"Anytime, Bug. I've been enjoying it just as much." Then Steve turned to include Bucky in their conversation. "What are you guys up to for the rest of the day?"

"Nothing, well, I think that's pretty obvious considering I'm just sitting here" Bucky shrugged. "Do you guys want to hang out? Maybe we can walk to that cool park a few blocks from here? Watch the sunset and get some fresh air?"

"That sounds good to me." Steve agreed. "Buggy, you in?"

Both boys watched as you stood up and slipped your gym back onto your shoulder. "As fun as that sounds, I can't. You know Agent 563? We made plans to have an early dinner together so I have to get ready to leave here soon."

"Booooo, buzz kill!" Bucky announced dramatically.

"That doesn't mean you can't go on a cute little sunset date with your boyfriend without me, Bucky." You smiled at him. "By all means, you boys have fun."

"I think that's great." Steve told you, ignoring the boyfriend comment. "563 is a great agent, and I think it's important that you girls stick together.

"Lord knows we need some time away from the amount of testosterone in this place." You agreed.

“Even me?" Bucky pouted.

"Even you." You smiled at him, approaching him for a hug that you had to bend over pretty far to get. "And Steve. I love you both, but I need to interact with other people than just you two!"

"Hey! I only talk to you and Steve and I'm doing just fine" Bucky defended himself.

"What about Natasha?" Steve wiggled his eyebrows suggestively at him.

"Don't bring up Natas-" Bucky started passionately

"I'm leaving!" You announced before an argument broke out. "Love you boys! Have fun on your date! I hope you hold hands and kiss each other's foreheads!"

Steve and Bucky stared at each other as you walked out of the room. The door closed behind you, and your foot steps faded until completely inaudible to either of their heightened ears.

"Why are you actually here, Buck?" Steve asked.

"You're in love with her." He claimed deadpan.

Steve's heart sank, but controlled himself the best he could as to not bluff. "Why would you say that?"

"I figured it out last night." Bucky admitted. "I was trying to sleep but my brain wouldn't turn off. I was thinking about the dynamic of our little friend group and it hit me like a train. I had to come confirm it with my own eyes."

Steve puffed out a performative chuckle and put his hands on his hips. "You understand how crazy that sounds, right?"

"Is it though?" Bucky raised an eyebrow while standing up from his spot on the floor. "I never noticed it until today. Your eyes physically twinkle when you look at her. Your cheeks have been pink since I got here, and you never stopped smiling until she left the room. Encouraging, sweet, considerate..."

"It's my job to be encouraging towards her, Buck. I'm her boss." Steve huffed, feeling annoyed and attacked by this conversation.

"Why won't you admit it?" He asked.

Steve stopped in place and noted Bucky's furrowed brows. "Wait, why do you seem so upset about this?"

"I'm not upset." Bucky denied, shaking his head. "But if you're actually pining after her, Punk..."

"What?" Steve's heart was pounding.

"Do you like her?" Bucky asked one more time, his tone was nothing but serious. His face was stone cold.

"I'm her boss." Steve slumped. "There's a power imbalance, I can't break her trust."

"And if she joins the Avengers?" His head tilted.

"She just got out of a relationship."

"It's already been a month since then." Bucky insisted. "Steve, this is between me, you, and the grave. I'm serious."

Steve threw his head back with a groan. It had been a while since he had seen Bucky this worked up about anything, so he knew it was important. But getting the admission to slip past his tongue felt morally wrong and partially impossible.

"Steve."

"Yes." He said simply, staring up at the ceiling.

"How long?"

"How long what?" Steve sighed.

"How long have you had feelings for her?"

"Since the day I met her..." Steve mumbled.

"Oh my-"Bucky rubbed his face with his hand before running his hand through his hair. "You hid it too well."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Steve froze up as his mind ran laps around Bucky's behavior. He already knew what was coming before he could admit to it.

"You're going to hate us, but I need to tell you something..." Bucky said apologetically.

Meanwhile, you were having a fantastic time with Agent 563, Clara. Though the two of you were friendly around the compound, you never had the chance to actually sit and have a long conversation with her before. Both of you getting the chance to vent about the workplace environment and culture to someone who actually understood what it was like to experience it in the unique way you did was refreshing to say the least.

After dinner neither of you were ready to end the conversation there, so you grabbed ice cream on the way back, and walked the whole way home together. At a certain point, work was a topic long forgotten as you two bonded over other similar interests like movies, hobbies, family, you two even shared the same love for video games.

By the time you made it back to your apartment, there was a smile on your face and a lightness to your heart you hadn't felt in a while. It was obvious that work was making you feel heavy and alone for a while, but you didn't realize how bad it actually was until you got away from it.

That smile was wiped off your face when you opened the door to Steve sitting on your couch with a stiffness in his body and an anger on his face you had never seen before.

"Hey, are you alright?" You immediately asked as his head snapped over to you the second the door opened.

Alarm bells were instantly ringing. Your heart dropped into your stomach, and raced with a speed you didn't quite know was possible.

You had given Steve and Bucky a key to your place just like you had keys to theirs, but the three of you typically hung out at Steve's place. Either of them coming to your apartment was a rare occurrence, and them ever using your key was even more rare.

Steve watched you kick off your shoes and hang up your purse, he felt so many emotions all at once that he couldn't even begin to get the words out.

You hesitantly approached, he still didn't answer. "What's wrong?"

"Why didn't you tell me?" Steve questioned. His tone very obviously gave away his state of emotion, it only made you feel more anxious.

You had a suspicion what this was about, but number one rule as an agent was to never incriminate yourself. "Tell you what?"

"Don't do that with me." Steve denied. "Bucky already told me. I don't understand why you guys would do that and keep it from me."

Your posture slumped knowing that this reaction was exactly why you and Bucky decided to keep a dirty little secret from Steve. So you sat down on an armchair next to the couch he sat on so you could explain.

But, he didn't even give you a chance to defend yourself before he spoke again. "Did either of you even consider how hooking up with each other would affect me?"

"Hey now, let's get some facts straight." You didn't let him go any further. "I feel like the term hooking up is giving what we did way more credit than what it was worth, and yes, we did consider you, which is why we both agreed we weren't going to tell you."

"Great, thank you so much for the consideration. That makes me feel really secure in my friendships with both of you!" Steve said sarcastically, feeling betrayed and admittedly heartbroken beyond words.

"Wait" You shook your head. "I know that sounds bad, but you have to understand that we all have different morals and personal opinions when it comes to sex and we knew you wouldn't understand."

"What is there to not understand?" He questioned. "You two had sex with no regard to how it would effect our friendships with each other."

"First of all, it wasn't sex, there was no penetration." You corrected. "Second of all, we didn't think it would effect our friendships because that's all we are to each other."

"I don't care about the details or what actually went down between you. Had either of you told me you liked each other from the get go it wouldn't have been a problem. I would've been happy for you two." He grumbled.

"We don't like each other." You denied. "We were just at the right place at the right time, things moved fast, and that's that. There's no romance happening, nothing to make social group weird. We all know Bucky likes Natasha."

"Well it's weird now." Steve glared at you.

"What do you want me to do now? It already happened, I can't go back and change it." You noted. "Want me to suck your dick too and call it even?"

"This isn't funny and I really don't appreciate that comment." He scoffed.

"It wasn't weird for you until Bucky opened his mouth, huh?" You asked him. "Was it weird for you two weeks ago when it actually happened?"

"I don't care." He swallowed thickly.

Feeling quite taken back by his behavior, and a little more that a little annoyed that Bucky spilled the beans, your attitude came out. "I'm a grown woman capable of making grown choices, and I don't owe you an explanation of what I choose to do with my body, Steve."

"No, you don't." He agreed, but you made him snap. "But I'm feeling betrayed and disrespected by the two of you, and that, I do feel like I'm owed an explanation for."

"Are you mad at Bucky too?" You snapped right back. "Huh? Did you yell at him?"

"He told me the truth." Steve rationalized.

"Yeah, well I never lied to you." You pointed out. "And why did Bucky feel the need to tell you what we did privately? Huh? Do you feel like I'm allowed to feel betrayed and disrespected for him going against our word?"

"I'm not here to tell you how to feel. I'm here to try and rationalize any of the choices we're making right now." He raised his voice. "My friends are the only family I have, and I refuse to lose a friend I've already lost many times before over a stupid choice."

Just with that one sentence, he broke your heart. "And that right there, is exactly why I thought it was okay in the first place." You growled as all of your self defenses came rushing in to protect you from the words you always knew to be true but never wanted to admit.

"What do you mean?"

"I'm expendable to you and Bucky. I always have been." You stood up from your spot next to him. "You say you're upset because you didn't want to ruin the dynamic of the friend group but guess what? The dynamic has always been you and Bucky hanging out and me just kind've being there. You'll always choose each other, and everyone will always choose someone else over me."

"That's not true." Steve denied. Although he was seeing red with anger, your words made him sad for you.

"I'm never anyone's first choice, Steve. You'll always choose Bucky, Bucky will always choose you. My sister will choose her husband, Harvey will always choose literally anything but me. Nobody else here is willing to be my friend because it's like social suicide, and I had to completely isolate myself from my normal civilian friends for this job." You explained. "I'm the best agent so I get used and abused and harassed out of the pack, but if I become an avenger I'll be singled out as the worst one. You and Bucky claimed you'd always have my back but now I know that's not true."

"Stop saying that." Steve shook his head.

"Nobody wants me." You spat, Steve could tell you believed that to be true.

It shattered his already broken heart, because if you had even the slightest clue of how bad he wanted you, you'd never say those words again. But he couldn't tell you, it simply wasn't an option.

"Nobody wants me ever but that night, Bucky wanted me. So forgive me for latching onto any ounce of human connection I can get these days. That choice was never about you, and I'm sorry that it hurt your feelings but I'm struggling more than I ever have and right now I need to put me first."

"Bucky and I have always loved having you around."

"That might be true, but you proved my point with your own mouth." A single tear fell down your cheek, but you wiped it away just as fast as it fell. "You said you weren't willing to lose Bucky. But right now it feels like you're willing to lose me."

"Don't be mad at him." Steve shook his head.

"He had no right telling you that without consulting me first." You denied. "Unless he broke some kind of code or something there was no rea-" Your own words made reality wash over you like an angry ocean wave trying to swallow you whole. "Oh my god."

"No-" Steve shook his head.

"He broke bro code, didn't he?" You asked Steve, feeling suddenly nauseous.

Steve felt nauseous too. His brain couldn't think of anything but the truth at the moment, but he was horrified. Though he tried to formulate the correct response, nothing felt right at the moment. "You slept in my bed."

"Oh my god." You took a slow step back, unable to process what information you were just receiving. He watched as your face turned just as red as his. "You like me?"

A billion different things came to mind. So many scenarios, so many possibilities, every single time you suppressed your own feelings for Steve because you never thought a man like him could ever love you. It was wrong. Yet all this time, he was harboring a secret of his own. And even then it was still wrong.

"You slept in my bed while you had a boyfriend." Steve spoke so firmly you swore you could feel the bass vibrating the floor.

"This whole time you we're hoping I'd jump right into your arms after breaking things off with Harvey?"

Steve knew where this was going, and the look on your face was just as horrified as he felt. Your lip was wobbling, your hands were shaking, and with every statement you took a step back. "No. But I did think that there was enough happening between us that you wouldn't go for Bucky."

"I slept in your bed because I trusted you, you asshole." You cried, pointing a finger at him. "I slept in your bed while staying with Harvey because he was the only man crazy enough to actually love me and I didn't ever think anyone would be crazy enough to love me ever again."

Steve opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out. His jaw hung open for a moment, before it closed, then opened again. "Well then I guess you were wrong."

"I was wrong." You agreed, wiping your face once more as you watched his eyes tear up. "I trusted you to keep me safe in training, protect me against the people who are harassing me. I trusted you as a friend, a confidant. I even trusted you enough to see me naked, but I was wrong."

"This is exactly why I didn't tell you." Steve mumbled. "Because you trusted me and I didn't want to break it. Bucky didn't know."

"So let me get this straight. You had a secret that you kept from both of us, but Bucky's actions are excusable because he didn't know. My actions are inexcusable but I also didn't know, and we did the exact same thing together?" You asked. "You spend a lot of time talking shit about men's double standards around the compound for someone who turned around and is treating me the exact same way."

"I'm trying to talks through this so we can all go back to being friends."

"You we're never my friend." Your words cut through his heart like a knife. "You we're someone being nice to me in hopes of getting in my pants one day."

"No, that's not true." Steve pleaded, blinking back tears. "Our friendship means a lot to me. That's why I'm this upset in the first place."

"I don't think I can ever go back to being just friends with your or Bucky ever again." You cried. "All of you guys here are the same, I can't do this anymore."

Steve watched you clutch your stomach, as you spun on your heels and walked straight for the door. Little did he know, you felt so nauseous you were trying your hardest not to throw up.

"So that's it?" Steve asked, standing up from the couch. "You're going to throw away everything the three of us have built together as friends because we can't have a rational conversation?"

"A rational conversation? You can't even admit that you're only mad at me because you wanted to get into my pants and now you feel like you can't because Bucky got me first." You turned around to look at him. "That's all I am to anyone. That's the only relationships I've been able to form since I've gotten in this compound. You, Bucky, Harvey. I'm not a human to you guys, I might as well just be a glory hole."

"You're misunderstanding me." Steve shook his head, eyebrows raising upward like a sad puppy.

"That makes two of us." You turned back around and grabbed your packed duffel near the door that you always kept for emergencies.

"I care about you, you know that right?"

"It sure doesn't feel like it right now." You denied his claim.

"Where are you going?" Steve asked. "This is your house."

"The compound has never felt like home to me." The door swung open. You didn't even look back at him before stepping through the doorway. "Don't worry about where I'm going, just say the fuck away from me."

And just like that, the door slammed behind you and rattled the ground. You set off like a storm on the other side, and Steve was left on his own to crumble. Only when he was sure you were gone for good did he let tears fall down his face.

Trying your absolute hardest to hold it together you rushed through the compound hallways, desperately trying to avoid seeing anyone you knew before you made it to your car.

You didn't have it in you to have a face to face conversation with Bucky at the moment, but you did feel like you needed to tell him that the friendship was over, so you called him instead.

"Hey, bug." He answered sympathetically.

"Why did you tell him?" You cried.

"I had to." There was a deep sigh from the phone line. "What did he tell you?"

"Why the fuck are you protecting him?" You asked. It was admittedly a little harsh, but Steve had already amped you up.

"So he told you everything." Bucky stated. "I figured out he was in love with you last night. I couldn't in good conscience keep our secret anymore. He needed to know because the longer we kept it from him the worse this would've been."

"He doesn't love me, Bucky." You denied. "What he did wasn't love. It was control, and it was power, but it's not love."

"I can tell you're upset with him, but I don't think that was his intention." Bucky calmly denied. "Give it a few days to settle, alright? You can be mad at us all you want and I understand why, but emotions are high right now and it seems like both you and Steve are villianizing each other."

"I'm going to be gone for the weekend." You stated, needing to set firm boundaries. "I love you, but you hurt me and I need to get away."

"I'm sorry, bug. I really am." He apologized.

"You, Harvey, and Steve will all be blocked from reaching me unless it's during work hours. And as of now, I can't be a friend of yours."

"I understand" Bucky accepted the repercussions of his actions, though he was sad about it. "I hope you know we care a lot about you. I'm sorry this is all happening this way, but I still want you to be safe. Will you let someone know where you're going? Maybe Commander Bennett?"

"Yeah, I will." You agreed, feeling relieved that at least Bucky was being rational. "I hope in a little while we can figure this out between you and I, but it's going to take some time."

"I hope so too." He agreed. "Stay safe, and be smart. I'm here for you whenever you're ready."

You hung up, drove off, and the second the compound was in your rear view mirror it felt like the weight of the world was off your shoulders.

The weekend came and went simultaneously way too fast, yet painfully slow at the same time. You stayed with your sister who welcomed you with widely opened arms, and really took the time to listen to you when you spoke. She let you get it all out, she wiped your tears, then by morning you'd put on a brave face for Luca.

Spending a lot of quality time with him was truly the only reason you hadn't fully lost your mind. By Monday you felt well enough to face the shit show that was work, but it didn't last very long.

You had made it a whopping 4 hours into the work week before getting sent to Steve's office with an ice pack pressed to your cheek and Commander Bennett opening the door for you.

Steve looked up as the two of you entered, but your eyes were glued to the floor. You didn't need to look around to see where the chair was. You already knew.

He hoped that Bennett couldn't feel the thick tension that filled the room, but it was unusual for him to follow you to his office, and he did take note of how bad you looked.

Well, unfortunately for him he always thought you were stupidly beautiful, but your eyes were swollen. You looked exhausted, drained, and nothing like your usual fiery self.

"We need to do something about 212." Commander Bennett cut straight to the chase. "We can't keep cutting into her work time and having her get hurt because 212 and all his awful friends are picking on her."

"What happened?" Steve asked, trying to see what was under the ice pack.

"I saw them trip her with my own eyes. I don't know if they thought I wasn't watching, or if they thought they were being sly enough that I wouldn't notice, but this cannot continue." He stood firm. "Poor thing smacked her face against the floor, but she still is claiming that reprimanding them will make it worse. So what's the solution?"

Steve sighed and leaned back in his chair. "Do you have any ideas, Commander?"

"Give them one more strike. Let them all know that if they pull this again one more time before evaluation we will disqualify them from taking the test." He suggested. "That includes physical, and verbal attacks."

"That's a really good idea, thank you." Steve agreed. "I'll talk to them today."

"Are you comfortable with that, 306?" Bennett asked you.

"Yes, sir." Your voice was hoarse.

"I'm going to give her the option of cutting her work day short or continuing her training, but no matter what we all know she doesn't need more training." He noted. "I'll leave her with you so you guys can figure out your schedules."

"Thank you." Steve said politely.

Bennett left and the door clicked shut behind him, but your eyes stayed glued to the floor. Your options were go to your apartment and sleep the rest of the miserable daylight away, or spend two hours alone in a room with Steve.

You both already knew what the choice was going to be. There was no need to discuss the schedule change.

Steve knew you hated his guts right now, and he was still feeling hurt by you, but it took a few moments for it to dawn on him that he still needed to be a boss and a leader regardless. So he put his best foot forward.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

There was barely any compassion in his voice, he might as well have been a robot, so you didn't bother responding. You didn't even bother looking at him.

"Would you like to talk about the incident?" He pushed.

"No, Captain." You responded, coming to the same awareness that he was still your boss.

Your use of his title and refusal to look at him felt like a shot to the heart. "Would you like to be relieved of duties until tomorrow?"

"Yes, Captain."

"You are dismissed."

Just like the last time he saw you, you walked out on him without as much as a glance back knowing the next time you'd be forced to see him would be evaluation day.

Next Part: pink peonies

Ooooohhhh we have some ANGST! Who’s right? Who’s wrong? I want to hear ALL your opinions! Sound off in my inbox! Team Bug, Steve, or Bucky? Let me know!

Tag list: @saranghaey @firephotogrl74 @selella @talesofadragon @ss28 @nekoannie-chan @jaqui-has-a-conspiracy-theory @spikeluv84 @crazyunsexycool @callmissrogers @xxxalicerogersxx @whore-for-chris-evans @em8rin @mulbsstuff @qalijahbydior @awkotaco24 @buckybarnessimpp @nicoline1998enilocin @buckysteve @rogersbarber @mybuck @dbnightingale24 @ynstark

Tag list is still open! Lmk if you want to be added 🌟

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hwaitham · 7 months

Text

𝓹𝓪𝓭𝓲𝓼𝓪𝓻𝓪𝓱 𝓹𝓾𝓭𝓭𝓲𝓷𝓰 ꒱ྀིა . ｡˓ ❤︎ ˖ ݁

al haitham x f!reader . sfw . established relationship ﾉ fluff + suggestive ﾉ reader is in a saree + haithie is in a sherwani :3 ﾉ reader has a rather cutesie personality ﾉ al haitham wubs u vvv much but ohhh ! is he ever the litl tease ( ˃᷄˶˶̫˶˂᷅ )

㌥( ྀིง ˙˘˙ )ว㌥ . . halloooo happie deepavali fwens :D ! ! this is my silly littl gift to u . . . it’s quite rushed + not my best work , but i rllie wanted to post something for today ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´ω`ﾟ)ﾟ｡ regardless of whether u celebrate the holiday or not , i hope everything that u wish for comes true && u r blessed w all the joys the universe has to offer ⭐️ ! !

fireworks shower the night sky with ribbons of light, colouring sumeru in vibrant reds and yellows and pinks. amidst the muffled pops and fizzles they create, you can hear the crowds pass by al haitham’s home up along the cobblestone path of the divine tree— laughter from happy couples and cheering from akademiya students, children ushering their parents to ‘hurry up’ lest they miss out on a good spot outside the sanctuary of surasthana to catch the fireworks (and all the sweets are sold out!).

you seem to exist in a similar vein, al haitham finds, when you begin to huff and whine, tilting your head up to pout at him in the mirror while he continues to calmly pin the jasmine garland he’d bought for you earlier in the day into your hair.

“haitham, we’re gonna be late.”

“we won’t be if you’d just keep still for a moment.” with a finger, he pushes your head back down, his lips curling into a soft smile and carving dimples into the apples of his cheeks when he hears you mutter under your breath. “truthfully, i don’t think you’re so preoccupied with being late as you are worried about all the padisarah pudding being sold out when we arrive.”

“yeah, w-well! well…” flaring up in embarrassment, you grumble, gather your cheek within your molars and bite down, avoiding al haitham’s gaze to look down at your hands— nails manicured and wrists sounding off little tinktinks! at the clinks of the bangles that adorn them. “hmph. so what if i am?”

your lover chooses not to dignify you with a response, and instead works a bit more hastily to finish decorating your hair, the rich floral notes and slightly sensual muskiness of the jasmine surrounding his senses until all he can really think about, feel is you.

oh, you darling girl of dreams. sweet, sweet light of his.

dressed the way you are in baby pink, the georgette fabric of your saree pleated and draped perfectly, bindi centred right between your brows, you look nothing short of doll-like, delicate and precious and the prettiest flower in the meadow.

“oww, haitham, you’re tugging on my hair!”

when he notices you wincing, al haitham is drawn out of his head and he ceases his movements in threading bobby pins through your hair, watching you raise your hand to massage the sore spot that blooms across your scalp.

“so fragile,” he leans down over you, his voice lilted into a playful tease, yet his touch so tender and cautious— as if to apologize for the pain he’d caused— before he lays a kiss to the shell of your ear all the while sliding one last bobby pin through your hair.

it’s only brief, but he hears the catch in your breath, how you stiffen your shoulders at the kiss, feeling its aftereffects as a warm trill travelling up and down along your spine.

so fragile, indeed. he staves off the temptation that bubbles in his chest at your meek little display, pocketing it to have his fun with you later in the night.

after all, padisarah pudding comes first!

“there, you’re all done.”

with a few more firm pats of his fingers around the bobby pins, al haitham secures the jasmine garland to your scalp, scritching your head sweetly and sealing his handiwork with a gentle press of his mouth to your temple. he admires you alongside yourself in the mirror, bringing two of the flower chains around either side of your neck, letting them fall along your chest.

“you made me look so pretty!” an airy giggle spills from your lips— soft and glossy as you step back from the mirror to do a twirl for him, reaching out to tug on his sleeve and bounce on your tippy toes, thanking him with a wet mwah! of a kiss to his cheek. “thank you, haitham!”

“wait a minute missy, we’re not leaving just yet…” before you can scamper away out of his clutches, al haitham wraps his fingers around your wrist, tugging gently in a silent command to stay facing him. when you do, he takes your cheeks within the cradles of his palms— searching your eyes and scanning your lips with sharp cerulean, a mischievous smirk.

pretty.

you’re so, so, pretty. something of a little butterfly that he’s come to grow perhaps overly fond of— with your tiny pearlescent wings, the flits and floats when you play among the summer flora, your delicate dances over teacups and honeypots. you fly circles around his heart and entwine it in pink ribbon, drinking its sweet nectar, making a home in the palm of his hands, the strong junction of his neck.

“haiyi…?”

he sighs rather dreamily when you squeak his name in confusion, his teasing smirk dissolving into something more tender as he tucks a loose tuft of your hair behind your ear and adjusts his hold on you, now squishing your cheeks together to effectively pucker your lips. “i think i require more than just a kiss as a thank you.”

“b-but—” you're caught off guard by his close proximity, looking anywhere else but his eyes in an attempt to fight off the roses blooming in your lungs and their petals stuffing your mouth full, leaving you void of oxygen. “but, padisarah pudding…”

at your deflated little whimper, al haitham laughs breathlessly, the corners of his mouth tugging up into a loving smile when he realizes just how endeared he’s become to your puerile nature. he’s hunching his back to hover over you, ghost his lips on top of yours, letting his breath fan spearmint over your face before he dips his head down into the crook of your neck.

“gosh, you’re just too cute…”

he lays his wet, open mouth over your pulse and kisses, and licks, and sucks, and oh—your head spins and your knees buckle as you press further against him, grapple at his shoulders to try and regain any sort of leverage over the dizziness that falls upon you. “hai-haitham; we gotta… gotta go…”

brows knitted tightly, al haitham only hums dismissively at your blubbery words, sliding a warm palm under the drape of your saree to take you even more by surprise. it smoothes down the side of your torso, tugs gently on the gold chain adorning your waist to bring you flush against his chest. his knuckles graze your flesh and his fingertips tease the clasps of your blouse and his touch—tender yet commanding—makes you want to sin.

and it’s only after he’s worked you up to this headspace, needy and clingy and wanting more, pawing at the buttons of his sherwani and panting rather eagerly into his clavicle, that he retracts, pinching the dip of your waist between his thumb and forefinger to bring you back down to earth.

ever the tease.

“hey!” you yelp, he chuckles, you frown, he smiles.

“c’mon. we don’t want you missing out on any padisarah pudding, do we?”

“you’re a horrible boyfriend.” weakly, you bat at his chest before turning away from him to slip on your heels.

he beats you to it, kneeling in front of you before you can reach down for your shoes, gathering the skirt of your saree in one hand before fitting the heel to your bare foot, kissing the gold ‘𝓐 ’ pendant of the chain that rests delicately atop your ankle. “oho, is that what you think of me, dear?”

softening around the edges, your heart skips several beats at the romantic gesture, and your forgiveness is instantaneous, for all you find yourself wanting to do in that moment is kiss and hug and love on him without inhibitions.

“i suppose you’re not all bad…”

he pats your head, rubs his nose against yours in a little bunny kiss. slathering you with his affection is the only way he knows how to apologize to you. “that’s what i like to hear.”

and just as he guides you out the door, on your way to stuff your pretty little face with as much padisarah pudding as your heart desires, he kisses the crown of your head once— for good measure— and pinches your waist, yet again— for good luck!

#𝓭𝓸𝓵𝓵𝓯𝓸𝓵𝓭𝓮𝓻 ⑅˚˖ ݁ ˓ ෆ #alhaitham x reader #al haitham x reader #alhaitham x you #al haitham x you #genshin impact x reader #al haitham fluff #genshin imagines #al haitham x y/n #haitham ❤︎

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selitoxicmoon · 6 months

Text

[FNAF AU] The Glamrocks

"Let's bring a bright welcome to our redesigned, pushed to their potential and superstars to the Glamrocks!"

People have the desired for me to redesign the Glamrocks for my AU "Security Breach: Revision" so here they are!

I am so happy how is getting together this AU which the next step is bring 'em the introduction and start this AU! But don't worry! THIS IS NOT EVEN THE HALF OF ALL THE GANG AROUND THE MEGA PIZZA PLEX.

The Glamrock take their places in the show stage and their own places and rooms. The Glamrocks proceeds to be in Rockstar Row as their room locations, meanwhile the Glampops are in the Popstar Path in the opposite side of the Rockstar Row. Entering to the show stage located, Rockstar Row is placed on the left side, while Popstar Path is on the right side.

The Glamrocks and the Glampops doesn't... like each other that much, there's a misunderstanding between them, an argument of which is the best music genre: Pop or Rock? Meanwhile Glamrock Freddy hasn't got any problem about it as his Glampop version, the others seems to not understand that it can be a good mix between Pop and Rock.

The Recycled has no problems with non of those gangs, even tho, they're fascinated by their concerts in the show stage wishing someday to be able to perform regardless their looks.

Reminder of this AU:

"Security Breach: Revision" amplifies the size and space of the Mega Pizza Plex and brings a second chance and update to FNAF 2, 3, 4 and Sister Location animatronics. More new locations, reincoporated and modified animatronics for a better experience and new places to explore!

This AU would be shown as comic and doodles to make you know about the characters interaction with each animatronic and discover lore behind them. Details, facts, exploration and even more forward the actual story prologue before Security Breach, either way is a completely reimagined story of the actual game and universe which NON OF THIS IS CANON.

Animatronics are NOT Possessed by any children, or similar, no corpses inside the animatronics, nothing, they're clean and their personalities comes from advanced AI system programmed by the technicians and Fazbear Entertainment.

So with it, I can introduce you to them:

Glamrock Freddy: The leader, the rockstar, the best father figure you might ever seen (daddy issues?); Freddy is someone really caring and the main character of the megaplex, adored by many of course. He cares for the children, makes sure nobody's hurt, makes sure everyone is having a faz-errific day and a good stay, he gives joy and smiles and what he loves most is to be with the ones he cares most and help anyone in need. He's a good mentor by the way.

Glamrock Bonnie: The most respectful one, Bonnie is everyone's bestie and he's really extroverted. He has got no shame at all but he does everything right, a good icon to follow I tell ya, he takes the electric guitar side while Freddy sings. He's a cool guy and actually loves cooking along Chica, he takes the Bonnie Bowl place and his star meal is carrot cake!

Glamrock Chica: An extroverted fella full of energy but not too clean nor neat at all- Chica smells like strawberry pie because she BAKES! Rockstar and baker? Why not my guy, she loves pizza, sheloves food in general and her star meal is strawberry pie. Chica is passionated with her work as guitarrist, never stops rocking as a Barbie girl (bc of the colors)! She's kind and really warm friend to be with but she rarely goes by herself to someone. Seems she's making distances.

Roxanne Wolf: She's the best! A good rockstar, the best keytarrist, a badass mother to take care of your children in Roxy's Raceway. She has many fans and as her clothing looks like, she loves so much car races and anything vehicle related. She's a good racer but a bad loser, to any birthday kid losing a race, she goes straight away to stop those other racers trying to make the birthday boy to win. As the security guards requested to Roxy, she takes care of Cassie and she has full access and membership forever because her dad passed away by "strange circumstances" deep down the Pizza Plex (do not worry tho, Cassie has mother so she just comes visit the place often). Roxy might have a really high ego and pride but... she blames herself a lot when plans don't go as she would like to.

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silvershiningtarot · 10 months

Text

🌀Pac 18+: Channeled Message From Your Soulmate ❤️💋❤️❌💋

Pile 1: This is our new beginning, I miss you so much, my love. I believe that you and I will have so much fun together. Can’t you see that? Because I can. I noticed that you've been worked up about something. Tell me what is it? What's bothering you, my love? I wish that you can talk to me right now. I have something for you. I want you to close your eyes and imagine how great our life will be. I want you to know that I care about you so much. You've fucking made it through everything. I wanna just hold your hand and tell you everything okay. I just wanna kiss 😘 all the time. Do you remember our first kiss? I've dreamt about our first kiss together. Date, child, wedding, honeymoon, and our future together and whatever how long that takes. I've got you, babe. You and I are meant to be together. I believe in our future. Do you? I know I've seen impatient or I'm forcing you to wait but I'm not. I'm just trying to tell you how I feel about you. I wish that I can hold you right now. So you can tell me all about your dreams when you wake up in the morning 🌅 so I can stare at you all day while you tell me all about your dreams. You've been my hero since day one. Look how strong you are. Look how beautiful you are. You are my world. I've been thinking about you all the time. Even though my job, I think about you. I remember my co-workers snapping their fingers at me because I was constantly daydreaming about you. Woo 😯 I am thinking about you right now. God! Help me lol 😆 I'm sorry my love. I am literally obsessed with you. Totally, I've got a crush on you. Baby, I have a little secret to tell you. I have a breeding kink. Yikes 😬. Shh 😯 don't tell anyone. Never tell anyone.

Pile 2: Hey, how are you? OMG did you know that I'm coming? Totally, coming into your life soon. 😯 so what are you going to tell me? I know I have tons of questions for you and us. You are such a ball of sunshine. It's like fucking weird 😕. I don't know how to explain how much sunshine you are. You light up my world. You've given me anything and everything👰. You are the bride-to-be for me. Shit! You've already my wife. So I can't wait to get to know you already. I don't know maybe, is this excited energy you giving off? If it is then I am fucking feeling it. You are my best friend. We can start over again, so we can move forward with our lives together. I feel like you should talk to me more. I wanna be your everything. Can I be your everything? I know that you are my favorite person in the world to me. 💋Can I kiss you? Can I hold you? Like forever. Is that okay? Be my forever.

Pile 3: True Love ❤️, I know you've been through a lot. You've sacrificed a lot to get the where you needed to be. But I am right here. I am here for you no matter what. I have two ears so I can listen to you. All day long. You've been through hell. But I am here for you. If you wanna talk to me in private we can. Baby, have you ever been somewhere that you feel left out still? Even when you hang out with friends and family you still feel left out. So fucking wack right? I can't think of anything right now. I'm bit frustrated a little bit. But anyway. You know you are my true love 😍 you are. Regardless, of our struggles, and problems can't we just run away we don't deserve what we deserve right? We deserve the world. Remember that. Make it your affirmation. You deserve better. Always deserve better. Never deserve what you deserve. Or maybe, I'm just deflecting and that's okay. I don't deserve what I deserve. I deserve someone like you. You! Are my one. Manifesting each other for a very long time. Thank you for being my ears 👂. I love you! Talk to me so much more. I wanna talk to you more. If you can. Please, I'm begging.

#pac reading #free tarot reading #tarot reading #fs pick a pile #pick a pile #tarot cards #divination readings #love reading #intuitive readings #pac reblog #paid services #paid readings #love #channeled reading #channeled message

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cyberrose2001 · 10 months

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my time has come. *rubs hands together*

i rlly hope this is allowed but... okok so op comes back from a mission/patrol or whatever, a little bit injured. like he needs to stay in the medical bay for a bit. fem!reader is very obviously worried abt their beloved op and refuses to leave his side, even after ratchet confirms that op is just fine. right right so then it's late at night and after ratchet is used to reader sleeping beside op, he wishes them goodnight and leaves the medbay for the night. op and reader are cuddling and op decides to reassure his conjunx that he's okay with some tender loving care, in the form of sexual activities aka fuckin on his very own bed.

TFP Optimus x fem!Reader

I feel like I could’ve written this better, but I’m sore and in pain from my monthly’s (my uterus is killing me slowly), but regardless, I hope you enjoy! <3

Warnings: AFAB reader, fem reader, human reader, mentions of pain/death, reader tops OP in the med bay, general smut.

Word count: 1563

18+ ONLY MINORS DNI

“You scare me too much. You know that, right?”

It was starting to become more and more common. Optimus would be out in the field doing what he does best, kicking Decepticons aft first and taking names later. Well, honestly, it’s the other way around. Your mech always had a way with words, but occasionally, those words bite back.

Optimus is injured. Again. Though nothing too significant, as assessed by Ratchet, it’s still enough to send your heart into a frenzy of anxiety and dread. Your mind always anticipates the next time he comes back through that ground bridge, it will be his last. Injuries too severe for him to heal from.

But Optimus, the ever-persevering mech he is, is convinced that you have healing hands.

“I know,” He smiles, it’s reassuring, but you can see the small winces he tries to hide when you glide your hands across his dented chassis, “And I am genuinely sorry for it.”

“You always say that,” You exhale under your breath, resting your head under his chin, “One day, you’re never gonna come back to me, and sorry’s won’t make up for it.”

His vents hitch. Your words were harsh, like a blunt knife. And akin to being stabbed, Optimus is painfully aware of the risks every time he steps foot on the battlefield. He wonders what life he would leave you if he never returned, but the mere thought of that pains him more than a sharp edge.

“I know,” Optimus closes his eyes, and his smile falters, letting his servos trail delicate lines along your spine, “But I am fine. There is no need for you to bare my wounds; your solicitude is unnecessary.”

“Unnecessary? Optimus, I lay awake every night when you’re not in berth with me,” You scoff in disbelief, “Do you have any idea how many times I’ve cried myself to sleep because I’m so scared you’re never gonna… god damn it, I don’t wanna lose you. I can’t.”

Optimus watches as tears roll down your cheeks. He moves a servo from your back to gently wipe them away, “You’ll never lose me. That is a promise I will always keep.”

You bite back a sob and lean your head into his servo, “You better, but still, you’re hurt.”

“Only temporarily, if not at all,” He hums, the servo stroking your back creeping down to loosely cup your ass, “But if you still need reassurance, I am happy to demonstrate my optimal health.”

You feel a digit push behind the hem of your pants, and you know precisely what your mech is asking for.

“Optimus, there’s no way,” You wipe the rest of your tears away before pushing yourself up to straddle his pelvis, “If you hadn’t noticed, we’re in the med bay, and you’re in no shape to have sex.”

“You underestimate me,” Optimus purrs, and fuck; he’s squeezing your ass so nicely, “What better way to reassure my love that I am fine than by fragging them?”

You bite your lip and weigh your options. You both might get caught by Ratchet and risk not looking him in the optics again or have amazing earth-shattering sex with Optimus, but risk hurting him. You glance at his face again, and you shouldn’t have because optics have dimmed with pure arousal.

You gulp, “Are you sure?”

Optimus tugs down your pants, now hanging loosely at your ankles. He leans up and kisses your shoulder, “Undoubtedly.”

He’s pulling your underwear down now, and it seems that your body has decided for you because you’re utterly drenched. Fuck it.

“Forgive me, Ratchet.” You lean forward and collide your lips with your lover. Optimus returns the kiss with equal enthusiasm, grunting as you push your tongue into his mouth to tangle with his own.

During the breathless kiss, Optimus pushes his servo between your body, pressed against his own. He runs a digit along your wet slit, and you can feel his shutter against your mouth. He pushes a digit inside, and you let a desperate moan slip.

“So wet for me already,” He breaks the kiss and pumps his digit slowly, “Remove the remainder of your garments, please.”

You oblige, sitting upright again, and, in turn, pushes the digit further inside you. You struggle to rip your shirt and bra off as you feel him curling against your g-spot, throwing them somewhere off to the side.

“Please, Optimus.” You shiver and lean your arm back to paw at his interfacing panel, which feels ready to burst, “Let’s be -fuck- quick.”

He withdraws his servo from underneath you, and it glistens under the surgical lamps with your fluids and leaves you longing for something to fill you. With the same servo, he fumbles with his interfacing panel and unlatches it, spike pressurising against your back.

You ready yourself over his weeping spike, a hand splayed on his abdomen and one wrapped around his spike. Biting your lip, you press his tip inside and push your hips down as far as possible. You moan at the fullness, lip quivering once you’ve fully sheathed yourself around him.

Optimus grunts at your fluttering walls and moves to grip your hips, massaging your flesh to keep himself under control. His optics flicker to your eyes, “Remember, be silent if you wish not to alert the others.”

You nod and slowly lift your hips, slamming them back down, and choke. Optimus rarely lets you ride his spike, preferring to top and fuck you himself. But god, every time you do feels better than the last. The feeling of every little bump and groove along his thickness is pleasurable beyond imaginable, and you’re finding it harder to keep quiet.

Optimus’ grip on your hips tightens, and before long, he’s guiding you to slam down on himself more forcefully. The only sounds filling the med bay are the lewd echoes of flesh against metal and your combined hushed whimpers.

Your lover groans, optics trained on your soft body bouncing on his throbbing spike. He loves the way your breasts and stomach jiggle every time your hips meet his own. And fuck, he can feel his impending overload.

Optimus reaches his arms around your back and forces you to lie plush against him, and before you can protest, he covers your mouth with a servo.

“Shhh, you wish for me to be quick, hmm?” Optimus growls lowly, readjusting his hips underneath you.

You nod and moan against his palm, wiggling your hips for more friction. He satisfactorily hums.

“Well, you must be quiet,” Optimus rolls his hips upwards slowly, “If not, and we are discovered, I will not hesitate to use a gag next time. Are we clear?”

Well, now you know for sure that Optimus is fine; his dominant side is showing off. It always creeps out of him when he is nearing overload, which means lying down and taking it. And you fucking love it.

Optimus removes his servo covering your mouth and returns it to wrap around your back. His hips start slow before transitioning into a break-neck pace, and the force causes your head to rest on his chassis.

“Oh fuck,” You whine softly. Your eyes squeeze shut, and you bring your hand to your mouth to bite the flesh of your palm, a pathetic attempt to silence yourself. His spike hits deeper than before, hips craned at the perfect angle to rub against your g-spot.

Optimus’ restrained moans emanating from his chassis vibrate your skull, “So warm and tight, I’m sure you’re enjoying this, needing to keep quiet, hmm?”

“Yesss,” You whisper, only loud enough so he can hear you above the wet sounds of his thick spike entering you, “I wanna cum… please.”

Optimus groans and kisses the top of your head, thrusts his hips into you harder, “Frag, you’re so good for me. Overload then.”

That’s all it took before a white-hot flash of pleasure explodes in your lower stomach, tight walls clench around him like a vice as your orgasm shakes your body. Your teeth clamped on your palm loosen, and your jaw drops in a silent scream, taking all your strength to suppress your vocal cords as Optimus pushes himself to the hilt, hot trans fluid shooting up into your sore pussy.

You move your head to look up at him, and by the Primes, does he look gorgeous. His jaw is clenched, and his optics are screwed shut in utter euphoria. And the most admirable thing is that he didn’t even make a sound. You make a mental note to applaud him for it later.

You feel his arms loosen against your back as he spurts the last of his trans fluids inside you, dripping out onto the gurney below, a concoction of your combined fluids that will most likely need multiple rags to clean up.

Optimus unclenches his jaw, and an ungodly amount of smoke shoots out of his exhausts. He looks down at you and gives you a soft smile, venting raggedly.

“Was that enough proof that I am fine?” He whispers, cupping your face to give you a breathless yet passionate kiss.

You hun into the kiss before releasing from it, “I suppose so,” You turn your head to observe the sheer amount of fluids coating Optimus’ hips and the gurney, “But let’s clean up before Ratchet kills us.”

#transformers prime #transformers prime x reader #tfp #tfp optimus #tfp optimus x reader #tfp optimus x human reader #valveplug #cyberrosewrites

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pixelatedraindrops · 3 months

Text

Hello everyone!! Today I grow a year older :3 (and I hate it lmao) FEEL FREE TO REPLY BIRTHDAY WISHES IF YOU WANT :3

So, over the time I've come back here, I've become pretty confident and proud of my once hidden passion about sick characters, sickfics and sick comfort/whump... 🌡️

And you all have been so supportive and sweet despite my weirdness so I thank you for that. You helped me feel more confident in my otherwise weird fixation <3 So, for my birthday I thought I'd try and make up a little drawing challenge for anyone who wants to give it a try... There are soo many talented artists on this site (and in this fandom)

So... It's your turn to target your faves now. You will see how fun it is and hopefully understand why I love doing it so much. 😈🌡️

(plus it's my birthday and I require some sustenance LMAO JKJK)

But yeah anyone can join in. This is just for fun though! You don't have to if you don't want to! I think its okay to ask for some food on my birthday though...right?? X'D So if you wanna do sth for my birthday...then... 👉👈 💦

CHALLENGE BELOW~

DRAW YOUR FAVE ON A SICK DAY CHALLENGE🌡️😷🥵🤧

~~~~

(Mmmmkay, I am lying to myself when I say this isn't mostly aimed at the RainCode community... X'D Can't help myself. But anyone can join regardless of the fandom!!)

So here's the challenge and the rules!! (featuring my two main lil targets ofc :3)

Regardless of who it is, put your fave through some sickness hell >:3c I'd love to see it! Make em' as miserable as you want!

destroy them 😈 jkjk XD

If you're in the RainCode community you can target anyone, but as you know, my main targets are Yuma and Makoto. If they're also your faves and who you decide to use, that will make me extra happy!

Some tips for anyone new to drawing a sick day scenario art. A few things that make it look convincing are the following:

Pajamas or Loungewear

Messy Bed Hair

Fever flushed face w sweat or at least a red nose

Tired Eye bags

Shivery body

Ice Pack or a Compress on the head

Thermometer sticking from their mouth

LOTS OF BLANKETS

Tissues or medicine surrounding them

Tea or Soup (or both)

Those are just to name some from the top of my head. If you'd like some pointers on how to make a character look ill, check out my Fever Coloring Guide. This is for digital artists but traditional artists can try it too!

You can add injury or angst to the scene but I'd like illness to be the main focus of it.

The scene can be anything you want to, it can be fluffy and wholesome (with a caretaker) it can be angsty, or it can be silly. Its all up to you! Do it for the sake of fluff! Caretaking scenes are the best for any kind of relationship >w<

Either way, have fun with it!! I look forward to see what people make if they decide to give it a try! It doesn't even have to be a full on picture! Doodles and sketches are fine too! Just show me something >w<

(feel free to tag me and say happy b-day and mention my challenge, I am proud to be known for this and would love for many to participate :3) I wanna see you take a go at it :3 Show me your style! :D

~~~

(wow look at me misspelling the word writing on text when I did it fine with my own hands lol)

Now, I know not everyone can draw...

Well never fear! I accept writing as well! ✍️✍️✍️

(hi vivia lol sorry for giving you a cold, at least you have an excuse to read and do nothing now haha x3)

Sickfics are one of the biggest things I live for! Any little drabbles or full fics with more than one chapter are welcome! Again target who you want any fandom you want, but I'll def be super happy if you make a RainCode fic. And even happier if you target my faves as well, but again, anything will do! Just make a cute story about your fave being miserable and being tended to! Trust me, it's super fun!

You can add injury or angst to the scene but I'd like illness to be the main focus of it.

Feel free to post your writing here and tag me or mention my AO3!

If you need a start to your fic, look on my blog for illness prompts! Maybe it can help give you a good start or give some inspiration! (thats why I share 'em :3)

I look forward to anything you try to write!

That's about all!! I hope you decide to participate! ✨

Good luck, have fun, and godspeed you future whumpers! 😈

(nah jk XD)

AGAIN THIS IS FOR FUN! NO PRRSSURE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO!

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beansprean · 2 years

Text

Guillermo tells us how to feel.

Like, consistently. He is the closest thing we have to an audience surrogate and HE tells us what our baseline expectations should be based on his reaction to the world. Luring virgins to a house of vampires to be murdered? All in a day's work! Chopping them up into bits and burying them in the backyard? Gross, but necessary! Re-deading your ex-wives in a Bachelor parody? Morally questionable but I'm not gonna stop you. Hypnotizing a man so many times his brain explodes and he dies? Sounds sad but can't talk, I'm embezzling and committing fraud atm. WWDITS is close to being an anti-comedy like IASIP or Seinfeld because the main characters are all awful people who commit terrible atrocities, but we DO care about them and their happiness because we are given that baseline to work from and know what to take seriously and what to laugh at.

The reason s4e9 felt so cruel was because Guillermo responded to it that way. Because HE was hurt and HE was upset and the last shot of the episode was his heart breaking on screen!! We are SUPPOSED to feel how he feels!! All season things have been getting better for him; he has been more appreciated and respected and has taken more control of his life and now the rug is pulled out from under him again. He/we are left wondering: Guillermo, what now? Is all this still worth it? Is it time for you to leave?

The vampires, as a rule, NO NOT CARE ABOUT HUMANS. They're livestock and free labor and occasional entertainment, and that's the way it's always been. (We haven't even talked about the fact that Nadja killed Sofia Coppola 😂😂😂) Vamps are too long-lived and jaded and used to killing to live for it to be any other way. Humans are playthings!! Unfortunately, that includes Nandor's wives. It includes Marwa, it includes Guillermo's family, and it includes Freddie. But it's starting to NOT include Guillermo.

Like Nandor, we are supposed to FEEL THE GAME ENDING. He was having fun, making a new human to play with because he was bored of his old one and getting to spend time with his best…man and literally could not compute that any of this would be upsetting to Guillermo. Because why would it? They're only toys, they can always get more. (Here, Guillermo is already held separate and above other humans)

But Guillermo was upset! He was angry! He didn't think it was fun, he didn't think it was a game, and this human was IMPORTANT to him and we see Nandor falter, stumble over his words, get quiet and soft and ashamed. The comedy is over and he stops having fun. And he does his best (best is debatable but he is very stupid) to fix it!!

Idk if these events will be specifically addressed next ep because we have important Colin things to do and there had to have been a decent time skip between Freddie leaving and Memo going to London, but I want to point out that THIS IS THE DARKEST HOUR MOMENT. Nadja is losing her club, Laszlo is losing his boy, Colin is losing his youth, Nandor lost his wife/boytoy and Guillermo's trust, and Guillermo lost his boyfriend and got his heart broken for the upteenth time. Things SUCK FOR EVERYONE right now - and that's the point!! Ep 9 of season 3 ended with Colin Robinson DYING. Next ep, things will start to look up. Right before something insane happens that makes everything SIGNIFICANTLY worse and leaves us on a year-long cliffhanger! 😃 And I for one am excited to see it lmao

(Also Marwa sidenote bc look how they massacred my girl:

I will miss Marwa and I'm sad about her (I know not everyone was fond of her like I was lol but idk if the writers expected anyone to feel a way about her regardless), and I'm left thinking "is this even Marwa?" If she has none of her own memories or body or personality left, can we even consider it her? Does Marwa no longer exist? May be the best outcome for her mental state if she now exists only in 1300s Al Qolindar again lol. But if the wishes get reversed or something else happens to return her to Marwadom I'm hopeful she will pull a Derek and return one day!! Wwdits is well known for bringing back one-off characters, and Marwa was a season regular in like 7/10 episodes so I'm not giving up on her yet... My fanart will continue.)

#wwdits #wwdits spoilers #wwdits s4e9 #wwdits speculation #not art #nandermo #freddermo #marwa wwdits #I ain’t mad bc I try not to get mad at tv shows anymore I spent all my tears on spn but I am anxious for what’s next lol #my post.#I may have to wake up at like 6 or 7 wed morning to watch

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landhoehoehoe · 2 years

Text

across the line - Logan Sargeant

Part 2 to blur the line

I'm sorry, I know you've waited a long time for this, but I just had sm stuff to do this last week 🫠

I am officially handing out holy water to anyone who reads this!🫣

Also this probably is my favorite part out of the 3 parts :)

Song recs:

The Monster - Eminem feat. Rihanna

High for this - The Weeknd (for the smut part)

Warnings: smut smut smut!, unprotected sex (do not do this pls), Dennis the menace, stupid Liam lol

Logan Sargeant x reader; A drunk night changes things between the two of you

Obviously the victorious weekend in Austria had to be celebrated, so later that night you found yourself in a way too revealing dress on the dance floor of an Austrian club, dancing to generic pop songs with Dennis.

He spun you around, occasionally colliding with you due to both your high alcohol levels.

Even though you wished your friends from home could be here with you, you felt at ease around your teammate and Fred, who made everyone laugh regardless of how well he knew them.

You would have felt the same way about Logan, too, if it weren’t for the champagne incident earlier today.

It had thrown all your thoughts on the wildest roller coaster ride.

There was only one thing about Logan you were absolutely certain of: He made you nervous in an inexplicable way while, strangely, at the same time, calming you down.

But right now you were having the time of your life, celebrating your third place like you’d just won the race.

Because frankly it felt like you’d won: You’d finally shown everyone that you belonged in F2, you’d finally silenced your critics.

Dennis twirled you around, making you laugh about his not very graceful drunk movements.

The Norwegian laughed, too, but this time he accidentally spun you around too fast.

He lost control over you and you crashed right into the person coming up behind you.

Hands found your waist, holding you close to the person’s chest to stop you from spinning.

Before your drunk self had even realized who you’d bumped into, you almost lost your balance again, leaning even further into the guy holding you.

He laughed.

You knew that laugh.

“Y/nnnn! The driver of the day!”, Logan exclaimed, tripping over some of his words because he probably was even more drunk than you were.

“Loooogaaannn!!”, you replied with equal enthusiasm, hugging him like you hadn’t seen each other in a long time.

You had met all of the guys at the club, but Dennis and you had lost Fred and Logan halfway through the night.

“Where’s Fred?”, you laughed, your hands wandering around Logan's neck when he started swaying to the music with his arms still wrapped around your waist.

“Don’t know! He wanted to talk to some Danish girl!”, Logan shouted over the loud music.

When you went to answer, he lowered his head towards your face so that he could hear you better.

You stood on your tiptoes, your lips softly brushing his ear when you spoke.

“And you didn’t find an American girl to hook up with?”, you asked teasingly, watching as he rolled his eyes.

He mumbled something, but the music was too loud for you to understand.

“What?”

He laughed, his signature smirk back on his face.

“Nothing, I just thought I’d be a gentleman and save you from Dennis’ dance moves.”

That’s when you noticed you’d completely forgotten about Dennis.

“Oh shit. Dennis!”, you turned around abruptly in Logan’s arms, ignoring the butterflies in your stomach when Logan pulled you back against his chest.

Dennis wasn’t where you’d left him anymore.

You scanned the dark room for your teammate, but he was nowhere to be found.

With panic in your eyes, you turned back around to Logan.

“We have to go looking for Dennis! He’s way too drunk, he could barely even talk straight.”

Logan nodded.

“Let’s check the bar first, then. Follow me.”

As Logan made his way through the dancing crowd, you tried your best not to lose him, but it was sheer impossible.

Elbows and shoulders were shoved into your way, sweaty people’s backs bumping into you here and there.

“Logan!”, you called out as loud as you could when you were about to lose sight of him.

His head snapped around and searched the crowd for you.

Quickly you waved, shouting his name again.

When he spotted you, he fought his way through the crowd again.

“Take my hand!”, he shouted over the deafening music, reaching out for you.

Gratefully you took the hand he offered you, letting him guide you through the club.

It took you and Logan a few tries until you finally found Dennis almost an hour later, sitting on the sidewalk outside of the club.

A nice group of girls had called you from his phone, letting you know where they’d sat the Norwegian down because he couldn’t really stand on his own anymore.

“Dennis!”, you exclaimed, so relieved that he was okay.

He lifted his head from his hands, smiling drunkenly when he recognized you.

“Y/n! So nce t s u!”, he slurred, and you could only guess what he had said.

You exchanged a helpless look with Logan. “He definitely needs to go home.”, Logan concluded, crouching down next to Dennis, resting a hand on his shoulder.

“Mate, y/n and I are gonna take you home now, alright?”

Dennis pouted. “No home! Party!”, then his head fell into his hands again. “Dennis, don’t you want to sleep?”, you added, hoping Dennis wouldn’t make an even bigger scene out in public, where any of you could easily be recognized.

“Sleeeeeeeeep!”, he groaned from between his hands.

Logan sent you an amused smile when you rolled your eyes. “Let’s get a taxi.”

Getting Dennis into the taxi turned out to be more of a challenge than you thought it would be. You put one of Dennis’ arms around your shoulders and Logan did the same on Dennis’ other side.

Like that you tried to maneuver him to the taxi while he kept telling the people passing by that you were his best friend who had just won a race.

“He can’t go back like this to the Prema apartment. René’s first gonna kill him, then kill me.”, you concluded when the three of you finally sat in the taxi, Dennis sitting between you and Logan.

You looked at Logan helplessly across Dennis, making the Carlin driver furrow his brows in contemplation.

“Let’s go to my apartment then. I’m sharing it with Liam, but there’s a couch and Liam won’t bother. Besides, he’s out partying right now, too.”

“Thank you.”, a small smile crept onto your face, which Logan returned.

With one last look to Dennis, who was already passed out between you two, you thanked the gods you didn’t have to try and sneak him past René.

Logan told the taxi driver the address and soon enough you started moving.

There was a pleasant silence when you leaned your head against the window, watching the Austrian nightlife rush past you.

“Dennis, wake up. We’re here.”, you whispered, nudging him carefully to not wake him up too abruptly.

You still sat next to him in the taxi, which was now standing in front of Logan and Liam’s apartment for the race weekend.

Dennis’ eyelids fluttered, but other than that you didn’t get a reaction out of him, so you nudged him a bit harder this time.

Logan gave the taxi driver an apologetic smile, now gently shaking Dennis’ shoulder on the other side.

“Wake up, Hauger. You can’t sleep here.”

Dennis only leaned away from Logan towards you, still refusing to open his eyes.

Slowly but surely you were running out of patience.

“Dennis, get your ass out of this car. Now.”, you slapped his cheek lightly, making sure not to hit him too hard but hard enough that he’d finally wake up. And it worked: Dennis opened his eyes in shock, giving you an accusing look.

Logan tried to mask his laugh with a cough.

“Ouchhhhh. What was that for?”, Dennis whined, holding his cheek.

“We’re here.”, you replied, getting out of the car before turning back to unbuckle Dennis’ seatbelt for him.

“I think I have to throw up…”, the Norwegian suddenly groaned, climbing out of the car in slow-motion.

Logan, who had also gotten out of the car gave you a concerned look.

The last thing you needed was for Dennis to vomit into the taxi.

“Okay, um…you just…get out and we’ll find you a bucket…”, you answered with slight panic in your voice, beginning to pull on Dennis’ arm.

When Dennis made it out, you placed Dennis’ arm around your shoulders once again and Logan came to his other side to support him.

The taxi driver wished you good luck before he took off into the night.

“I’m gonna throw up.”, Dennis mumbled again and almost made you fall to the ground when he leaned onto you too much.

Luckily Logan reacted in time and pulled Dennis back off you.

With more than one stop, the three of you somehow managed to struggle your way upstairs to the apartment.

“Keys?”, you panted breathlessly, holding Dennis’ arm in place around your shoulder.

Logan searched his back pocket for the keys and unlocked the door. From the door it wasn’t a long way to the living room anymore and you were more than relieved when you could lie Dennis down on the couch, finally freeing yourself of his bodyweight.

“Do you have a blanket and a bucket?”, you asked over your shoulder while you stuffed a pillow under Dennis’ head. Logan nodded, then left the room.

Dennis had already closed his eyes, drifting off into his drunken dreams again.

“Thanks, y/n, you’re a great friend.”, he could only mumble, but it still made you smile. “No problem, Den.”

Logan cleared his voice behind you.

You tucked Dennis in with the blanket Logan gave you and put the bucket next to the couch.

“Good night, Dennis.”, you whispered, before leaving the living room behind Logan.

When you’d closed the door, you let yourself fall against it, the exhaustion of the trip getting the better of you. After all, you were still pretty drunk yourself.

Your eyes fell closed for a second as you focussed on taking deep breaths.

Only after a few moments did you remember you were not alone.

So you opened your eyes again and looked at Logan, who was already looking at you.

“I should probably get going.”

Logan shook his head.

“No way you’re going home by yourself drunk in a foreign country.”

“I’m a big girl. I can handle myself. But thanks, Logan, for all of this.”, you gestured towards the living room while already making your way to the door of the apartment.

“You’re not leaving, y/n.”, Logan retorted, stepping in front of you quickly.

His head tilted to the side, a mischievous expression on his face now.

“Besides, I still have to take you up on that grilled cheese offer.”

You couldn’t help but crack a smile.

You liked that he’d remembered your conversation even though it had already been a few months since then.

Maybe you could stay a little while longer?

“You really wanna test my drunk talent theory?”, you replied with a smirk.

Logan shrugged, still smiling.

“Why not? I could use some food now, and I wanna see how talented you really are.”

“Challenge accepted, Sargeant.”

Once Logan had given you all the ingredients you needed for a grilled cheese sandwich, you got to cooking in the small kitchen of the apartment.

You stood in front of the stove, flipping the sandwich in the pan while he leaned against the counter, watching your movements intently.

“You know, you are a really good friend to Dennis, with the way you look after him and everything.”, Logan suddenly said, making you turn your head to look at him.

“Because I didn’t leave him wasted at the club all alone?”, you replied sarcastically, avoiding his gaze to stop the butterflies in your stomach.

“Well, yes, but…you always take care of everyone. You always want to make sure everyone else is comfortable, but you forget about yourself sometimes, it seems.”, he answered and you were almost taken aback by how accurate his observation was.

So you focussed on the grilled cheese in the pan in front of you, shaking your head.

“Nonsense. I just…want what’s best for the people I love.”

You could hear Logan stepping closer behind you.

“So you love Dennis now?”, he asked, watching your reaction closely.

“Well..I wouldn’t go that far..but yes, he’s like a brother to me.”, you gulped nervously, looking at him over your shoulder.

Logan nodded, stepping even closer to inspect the grilled cheese in the pan.

You could basically feel his chest against your back now.

“I guess it’s true that you’re a good cook when you’re drunk.”

You smiled at him over your shoulder proudly.

“Want a bite?”

When he nodded, you fished the sandwich out of the pan and put it onto a plate.

Before you could realize what you were doing though, your drunken mind had already convinced you that it would be a good idea to take the sandwich into your hand and feed him.

He smiled, his eyes wandering in-between the sandwich and your hand.

His eyes rested on you the whole time when he took a bite and you almost melted, cursing yourself for your stupid idea.

You were definitely still too drunk to think straight.

You swallowed, quickly taking a bite to avoid having to speak.

Logan chewed in contemplation.

“This is good. Really good.”

“Thanks, I’ve had many drunk nights to perfect the recipe.”, you replied, making him laugh as he licked over his lips.

You turned off the stove and leaned against the kitchen counter, taking another bite of your heavenly grilled cheese.

“So…you never told me what your drunk talent is.”

Logan thought about his answer for a second.

“True….but..I don’t know what my drunk talent is, to be honest.”

“Come on, there has to be something.”, you encouraged, offering him the rest of the sandwich. This time you didn’t even intend to have him eat it out of your hand, but instead of taking the sandwich out of your hand, he leaned forward again and looked at you with the same hungry eyes when he bit into the sandwich.

You squeezed your thighs together.

How could a person be so fucking hot?

Once Logan had swallowed, he cleared his throat.

“Well, there is one thing I’m good at….”

You tilted your head.

“Oh yeah? What’s that?”, your voice had gotten lower and scratchy now.

Somehow the atmosphere had shifted completely again, the tension getting thicker and thicker by the second, causing the wetness to gather in your underwear.

“I’m a pretty good kisser.”, he answered in the same low voice, a confident grin on his face.

He took a step closer to you, now being so close that you had to look up at him.

He’d caught you completely off guard, your cheeks turning a bright shade of red instantly.

Thanks to the dim kitchen light, Logan couldn’t see it though.

When had the conversation taken this turn?

“I don’t believe you.”, you faked a confident laugh, crossing your arms over your chest with a challenging look on your face.

“You wanna test that theory?”, he replied cockily, placing his hands on either side of you to trap you against the counter, leaning into you ever so slightly.

“Maybe…”, you whispered, swallowing hard.

You couldn’t even do anything about your gaze falling to his lips, as you sucked in a sharp breath. Logan smirked, his face getting closer to yours inch by inch.

“Let’s make a deal: If you like my kiss, I get another grilled cheese.”, he suggested, not taking his eyes off of you.

Subconsciously your body tried to put some space between you and Logan, pushing against the kitchen counter behind you.

Logan noticed it, his smirk growing even wider.

You wanted this:

Him, now.

“Deal.”, you could only shakily breathe out before you couldn’t help yourself anymore.

You leaned forward to finally connect your lips, hands automatically wandering into his hair.

He moaned into the kiss, pressing his body against yours.

You could already feel his dick getting hard against your core, which only added to your own arousal.

When the kiss got wilder, Logan’s hands found their way to your thighs, hoisting you up so you could sit on the kitchen counter.

Then he pushed your legs apart to stand between them while he continued kissing you passionately.

You arched your back into him, craving his body like you’d been starving for days.

His hands crept up your thighs to give your ass a quick squeeze, before they moved further upwards to the low-cut back of your dress.

You whined when you felt his fingers grazing your spine, so you tugged at his hair to make him move faster.

However, Logan just smirked against your lips. His hands left your back as fast as they’d gone up there and his lips left yours.

You took a second to breathe, taking in his messed up hair and his slightly swollen lips.

“So? Did I lie?”, he asked, his voice dripping of confidence.

“Meh.”, you shrugged, trying to hide how desperate you actually were for his touch.

“It was mediocre.”

Logan scoffed, jokingly slapping a hand to his chest.

“Mediocre?!”

You laughed loudly, pulling him back to you, resting your arms around his neck. “I’m kidding, come here!”

Logan let you pull his face back down to you, but he turned his head away from you so that you couldn’t kiss him on the lips anymore.

However, that wasn’t a problem for you: You just started sucking on his neck, pulling a groan from him almost immediately.

“Y/n…”, he whispered breathlessly, turning back to you, causing you to stop your actions to look at him as well.

You caressed his neck with your nails while he looked deep into your eyes. Both of you breathed heavily, the desire for the other too big to resist.

In this moment you would have loved to know what Logan was thinking about right then.

What was he seeing when he looked at you? A quick hookup?

The beginning of something serious? A casual friends with benefits situation?

Quickly you shook your head to snap out of your spiraling thoughts.

You didn’t want to worry about the consequences of this hookup now, so you decided you’d deal with it tomorrow.

Maybe you could even blame it on the alcohol…but deep down you knew this wasn’t happening because you were too drunk to control yourself.

You wanted Logan, no matter if you were drunk or sober.

You just didn’t know how Logan felt about all of this.

However you didn’t have much more time to think about it, because Logan’s lips crashed into yours, the excitement in your body taking over again.

Logan leaned into you, grinding against your core, your hips moving impatiently against him in return.

“You’re so sexy in that dress.”, he whispered into your ear, making you shiver.

His hands gripped the fabric of your dress needily until they got a hold of your ass.

Then he picked you up and carried you to his bedroom without interrupting the fiery kiss between the two of you.

Your legs wrapped around him, giving you more stability to grind your core against his crotch.

When he’d reached his room he laid you down on the mattress.

Instead of following you though, he stood over you and took you in.

He admired your beauty, lying there on the bed only for him.

“What is it?”, you asked breathlessly, your mind racing with the wildest thoughts of his lips on your skin.

“Nothing.”, he shrugged, a smile creeping onto his face.

“Just think that you’re beautiful.”, he explained, before he crouched down to take off your heels.

At a loss for words, you sat up on your elbows, watching as he carefully freed you from the uncomfortable shoes.

Once he’d succeeded, he pulled you towards the edge of the bed by your legs, making you gasp.

His face was now directly in front of your clothed core.

You sucked in air loudly in anticipation.

“Gonna show you that this is not just mediocre..”, he growled, pushing your dress up and pulling your panties down, exposing your core.

“Logan..”, you panted, feeling his breath against your core.

You were so wet by now that you were desperately craving your release.

“All in good time, pretty girl.”, he smirked, spreading your legs to give him more room.

His hands slowly crept up your thighs while he kissed his way up from your inner thigh to your core.

It was so slow and sensual that you couldn’t help but moan again, your hips bucking up in need for some friction.

“Someone’s impatient today.”, he laughed when you huffed.

“Don’t worry, baby. You won’t forget this one, I promise.”

His words sent a pleasant shiver down your spine.

Then finally his tongue flicked at your core, making your mouth fall open for a silent moan.

You writhed under the sensation until his arm came up to your waist to hold you in place while his tongue made you see stars.

“Logan..”, you moaned again, your mind not able to function properly.

“Tell me what you want.”, he replied, not stopping.

“I want..”, you tried to speak, but were interrupted by a pornographic moan falling from your lips.

“I want..”, you began again, but the rest of your sentence was lost in yet another moan because he started sucking on your clit.

“If you want my fingers just say so baby.”, he whispered, two of his fingers slipping into you with ease.

Your hips bucked up uncontrollably, your high building up rather rapidly.

“I’m gonna cum..“, you whined when he sped up his fingers and curled them inside you perfectly.

“Good. Want you to make a mess all over my fingers.”, he panted, his tongue circling at your clit continuously.

His words were all you needed to send you over the edge.

With a few more thrusts from his fingers you clenched around them, coming undone while moaning his name.

While you were still coming down from your high, Logan freed himself of his shirt and pants before he crawled on top of you. He pulled your dress up and over your head.

“You ready, pretty girl?”, he asked, engaging you into another passionate kiss.

When he moved his hips against you, his dick slid through your folds, leaving you wanting more once again.

“Fuck me, Logan.”, you breathed out, keeping the intense eye contact with him as he aligned himself at your entrance.

Slowly, slowly, he pushed into you, enjoying the way your walls clenched around him.

You gasped at the feeling of him inside you, filling you up completely.

“You’re so pretty under me.”, he smirked, then picked up his pace.

His fast and deep thrusts immediately hit all the right spots inside of you, causing a string of curse words to fall from your lips.

It only spurred him on further, pushing your whole body up and down the mattress with his thrusts.

Your legs wrapped around his hips and your eyes were screwed shut, simply enjoying his touch. However, he didn’t like that.

“Look at me when I’m inside you.”, he commanded with a raspy voice, not stopping his movements.

“I… can’t.”, you replied with a whine, which only made him even more annoyed.

Quickly his hand came to your neck, squeezing rather harshly.

You squealed, opening your eyes in shock. Logan smiled, satisfied again.

“Not so hard, is it?”, he asked with a confident grin, leaning down to give you a sloppy kiss.

His thrusts were still fast and hard, making you go insane.

You made sure to keep your eyes focussed on him, even though you almost melted under his gaze.

When he filled you up and rested his hips against yours for a second, your mouth hang agape, your mind not able to cope with the sensation.

He pushed his hips further against yours, pushing you up on the bed.

“Still mediocre, pretty girl?”

You were quick to shake your head, letting out a loud moan.

“Fuck no! You fuck me so good!”, you praised, remembering last second that you were supposed to leave your eyes open.

“Such a good girl for me.”

Logan continued his thrusts, bringing you to the edge once again.

“I’m close..”, you gasped between your constant moans.

“Let go, baby.”, he encouraged, his fingers finding your clit to press down on it.

It made you clench around his dick, pulling an animalistic groan from him. “Fuck, you’re so tight.”

His thrusts got sloppier as he tried not to cum before you. He didn’t need to wait long though, because it only took you a few more thrusts until you came around his dick, moaning his name loudly.

He panted, in desperate need for his own release now.

“Where can I cum, darling?”, he groaned, almost breaking off the eye contact between you two.

“Inside me. Want to feel you..”, you whispered, riding out your high.

You didn’t have to tell him twice: He came inside of you within seconds, his sperm painting your walls.

Then he pulled his dick out of you and let himself fall onto the bed next to you. Both of you were breathing heavily, coming down from your highs slowly.

Once you felt like you could think straight again, you decided you hadn’t had enough of him yet.

So you rolled onto your stomach and crawled on top of him.

He watched you with a lazy smile on his face, letting you take over control.

After sharing a brief kiss, you peppered his neck with soft kisses, sucking at it every now and then.

You felt his hands coming up to your ass, squeezing it in appreciation, accompanied by a low moan.

You worked your way down from his chest to his abs, enjoying the way he twitched slightly under your touch.

“Y/n…”, he whimpered when you finally reached his already hardening dick.

“Easy, cowboy..”, you whispered, licking a stripe up his dick, planting a kiss to his tip when you reached the top.

His hips shifted uncontrollably, making you grin.

It was your turn to make him writhe now.

Still amused, you started moving your lips up and down on his length, hollowing out your cheeks. His hands went to your hair to hold it out of your face in a makeshift ponytail.

“Fuck…”, he hissed when you added your hand to jerk him off.

“You’re so perfect..”, he praised, to which you responded with a moan, your lips still around him.

Before you could continue though, he suddenly pulled you off of him.

You looked up at him with a confused expression on your face.

“Did I do something wrong?”

Logan immediately shook his head.

“I just.. wanna feel you around me again.”, he explained, before he pulled you up to him, his hands finding your ass again to push your core down against his dick.

You gasped at the sensation, feeling his dick between your folds, already getting wet again.

“Feels so good..”, he groaned, moving your hips slowly.

You couldn’t help but smile as you let him guide you.

“Desperate for me, Sargeant?”

Logan rolled his eyes and bit down on his lips.

“Maybe..”

Then he stopped his movements and you understood: You aligned yourself with his dick to sink down on him.

Both of you groaned, the feeling so incredibly good.

After adjusting to his size you started moving up and down on him, pulling another moan from the both of you.

“Fuck. You fill me up so good.”, you cried out, exhaustion making you slow your movements.

Logan didn’t want to slow down though, so he took matters in his own hands.

He fucked up into you, moving his hips at a steady pace.

You whined, taking his hands in yours to guide them to your boobs.

He squeezed them, making you lose your mind.

“Come on, baby. I know you got a third one in you.”, he spurred you on, which only resulted in you clenching around him, causing a loud groan to escape his mouth.

“I- oh my god!”, you exclaimed, letting go of his hands to steady yourself on his chest.

You looked down at him, tits bouncing with each of his thrusts, hair falling into your face.

He was a sight for sore eyes: abs contorted, eyebrows furrowed, messy hair sticking out in all directions.

His hands wandered back to your hips, his fingers digging into your skin as he picked up the pace further.

You rolled your hips against him, allowing him to hit the deepest spots inside of you.

And for the third time this evening you felt your high approaching again.

“Logan, I’m gonna-“, you tried to warn him, but it was too late: your high washed over you, making you scream in pleasure.

“Fuck, baby, you’re making me go insane.”, he praised, then he thrust into you one last time before releasing inside of you.

For a second you worried you might pass out from the overwhelming feeling.

So you let him slip out of you and wanted to get off of him, but his hands quickly held you in place.

You frowned at him, curiously waiting for what he was going to say.

“Stay. Please.”, he whispered softly, all the cockiness from before wiped from his voice.

You weighed your options for a second: either you could wander through the Austrian nightlife with nothing but your dress and filthy thoughts about Logan on your mind… or you could stay here, spend the night.

“Okay. I’ll stay, but only because Dennis needs me tomorrow to find his way back.”, you replied, letting out a small laugh when Logan rolled his eyes.

“I’m sure Hauger would be fine without you..but if it means you’ll stay, then please: stay.”

He sat up with you in his arms, looking at you intently, taking in every feature of your face.

“Stop staring.”, you whispered, connecting your lips to stop him from inspecting your face.

He sighed into the kiss before he flipped you over so that he was towering above you.

Then he broke up the kiss, got up from the bed and put on some grey sweatpants.

Confused, you watched as he disappeared into his connecting bathroom only to appear moments later with a small wet towel.

He walked back over to you and carefully spread your legs again.

You let it happen, not knowing what to say.

When he noticed your dumbfounded look, he tilted his head at you.

“What? You’ve never been cleaned up before?”

You looked away, avoiding his eyes.

“No…”, you mumbled lowly, suddenly embarrassed to admit it.

Logan tsked, shaking his head disapprovingly.

“Some guys don’t know how to cherish beauty when it’s lying right in front of them.”, he continued cleaning you with delicate movements, very aware of how sensitive your clit was right now.

You let yourself fall back into his soft pillows, enjoying the silence and his treatment.

Suddenly his phone rang next to you, interrupting the peaceful quiet mercilessly.

Logan groaned, equally as annoyed by the disturbance as you were. “Can you check who it is?”, he asked, bringing back the towel to the bathroom.

“It’s Liam. You should probably answer it, maybe he pulled a Dennis, too.”, you called after him, which made him laugh out loud.

“God, I hope not. But you’re right.”

With a few quick steps he was standing by the bed and you handed him his phone.

“Liam? What’s up?”, he held his phone to his ear and you couldn’t exactly hear the words the Kiwi driver was saying, but you could make out deafening techno music and Liam shouting something at Logan.

“Liam, Liam, listen!”, Logan tried to gain his teammate’s attention while rolling his eyes at you. You laughed, shamelessly taking in the sight of him: the sweatpants had your mind wandering to all kinds of dirty places in your mind immediately.

Thankfully Logan didn’t notice your staring since he was too busy with drunk Liam.

“Where are you? I’m gonna come get you.”, Logan sighed, rubbing his hand over his face.

After a few more tries, Logan finally managed to get Liam’s location and he hung up.

He sent you an apologetic smile, shaking his head.

“I’m sorry, Liam’s probably worse than Dennis right now. I have to go get him.”

You nodded, getting up from the bed, too.

Logan probably didn’t want you to stay in his room all alone.

“No, no, please. I’ll be right back, don’t go anywhere!”, Logan stepped towards you and softly pushed you back onto the bed.

He laid a kiss to your lips before he put on his shirt and searched his drawer for a fresh shirt.

“Here. If you need pants, they’re in the lower drawer.”, he smiled, handing you one of his comfiest Carlin t-shirts.

You scrunched up your nose and tried to hide your smile when you didn’t take the shirt out of his hands.

Logan frowned.

“That would be treason though: me wearing Carlin.”

Logan chuckled, then turned back to his drawer once more.

“That’s a shame because the colors would look great on you.”

“Hm… I think you would look better back in red to be honest.”, you replied with a smirk when he handed you a different, neutral shirt this time.

He rolled his eyes playfully, admiring the sight of you in one of his shirts.

“Now go, there’s a Kiwi in need of your help.”, you reminded him of his mission, snapping him out of his thoughts.

“Are you sure you’ll be fine?”

“Yes! Go, Sargeant, I can cope without you.”, you laughed at his overly dramatic hurt expression.

Still, he stepped towards you again, leaning down to kiss you.

“Don’t go anywhere.”, he whispered, then turned around to leave.

Once he was gone the tiredness and exhaustion hit you like a bus. You only managed to lazily pull the sheets halfway up before your eyes already fell closed.

You woke up from the sun shining directly into your face.

Slowly you opened your eyes and were about to sit up, when something prevented you from moving.

Logan’s arm was wrapped around you tightly, pulling you closer to him in his sleep.

Only then did you realize where you were, the events of last night washing over you.

You’d had sex with Logan. Amazing sex.

With Logan!

Thousands of alarm bells rang in your mind all at once as the gravity of the past night sunk in. You’d slept with a driver on the grid.

A thing you’d sworn yourself to never do because you didn’t want to be judged by the media: The only female Formula 2 driver already sleeping around with other drivers.

Your whole body tensed up, panic overcoming you.

Even though you wanted to stay here in his arms, even though you liked the feeling of his body close to yours, you couldn’t breathe right now.

So you removed his arm from your waist rather ungently, freeing yourself from his blanket to stand up and frantically search his darkened room for your dress.

Fuck.

Where did Logan take it off of you?

It must’ve been here, right?

In your panicked state you didn’t realize that you’d woken Logan up.

He blinked and stretched, until he noticed you weren’t lying next to him but were currently pacing up and down his room.

“Y/n?”, he asked with a sleepy voice, running a hand through his hair.

You froze, cursing yourself for being so loud.

How the hell were you supposed to explain to Logan what was going on?!

“Um…hi. I…I was just looking for my dress...”, you stumbled over your words in the process of trying to find the right ones.

Logan looked at you long and hard, like his brain was trying to comprehend the events that got you here, in this situation.

Suddenly he was very aware again of what had happened last night: The two of you had crossed a line. But you were just too tempting, even now: standing in the middle of his room with messy hair and his oversized t-shirt.

Logan didn’t want to admit it, but you’d done something to him.

Something scary.

Something he hadn’t felt in a long time.

Apparently you didn’t feel the same way he felt, though, because it was clear to see from your tensed up body language that you didn’t feel comfortable right now.

So he did the one thing he knew was best for his own heart: he nodded, slowly got up from the bed and handed you your dress wordlessly.

Apparently the panic had made you blind, because the dress had been lying in front of you the whole time.

“Listen, y/n. About yesterday…”, he started, not looking at you.

“Can we just skip the awkward part and pretend this never happened?”, he scratched the back of his neck nervously, knowing full well that he was lying to your face.

Maybe if he hadn’t been so focused on sounding believable, he would have noticed how your face fell for a brief second.

But when he looked at you again, you’d already had enough time to regain your composure. You swallowed.

“Um…sure. I was about to go now anyway..”, you replied, trying to hide the disappointment in your voice. This was what you’d hoped for, right?

That Logan would reassure you this was just a one time thing.

Why did it hurt so much then?

You stood in front of each other hesitantly, the easiness from last night long gone now.

“Hello?”, you suddenly heard Dennis mumble in the kitchen.

Your eyes widened, mirroring Logan’s shocked expression.

You’d completely forgotten about your teammate.

“Answer him!”, you whisper-shouted to Logan, unsure whether you wanted Dennis to know you’d spent the night in Logan’s bed.

Logan went to the door with some quick steps, then he stepped out of his room before closing the door to leave you alone again.

“Hey, mate. How are you feeling?”, you heard Logan say to Dennis, who answered with a loud groan.

You would have laughed if you weren’t in such a bizarre situation right now.

You were unsure about a lot of things but there was one thing you were absolutely certain of: You’d have to forget this night with Logan ever happened.

Or else it would be impossible for you to move on and to continue racing against him.

So you changed out of his shirt and slipped back into your dress. Better to start cutting the ties to Logan right away.

“Where’s y/n? Did she get home safely?”, Dennis asked Logan on the other side of the door as you were just about to open the door.

You took a deep breath: you had to look as composed as possible.

If Dennis asked, you’d simply slept in Logan’s bed.

Nothing had happened.

When you heard Logan stumble over his words, unsure of what to answer, you opened the door and joined the two drivers in the kitchen.

Dennis’ hungover mind needed a minute to process the meaning of this, but when he finally realized, his eyes went wide and his mouth fell open.

You hoped he wouldn’t say anything stupid now.

Logan cleared his throat nervously and quickly turned back to the coffee machine.

A steaming mug was already placed before Dennis, who sat around the kitchen table.

“Um….so what does this mean?”, Dennis asked, a cheeky grin tugging on his lips already.

You sat down in front of him, giving him your best death stare.

“Nothing. You were so blackout drunk that we couldn’t possibly have gone back to our place so Logan offered to let us sleep here.”, you shrugged, hoping you looked unfazed enough even though you were nervous as hell.

Dennis looked at you intently, trying to see through your facade.

“I don’t recall sleeping in Logan’s bed.”, he commented, and you knew he was trying to get a reaction out of you.

That’s when Logan sat another mug down in front of you and took the place next to you.

You narrowed your eyes at Dennis, ignoring Logan’s gaze on you.

“You probably don’t recall anything from last night.”, you bit back, regretting that you’d ever helped Dennis.

“Enjoying your headache?”, you asked in an overly sweet tone, smiling at Dennis dangerously.

Dennis sighed, taking another sip of his mug.

“Don’t remind me of it.”

Needless to say the morning was awkward. Dennis wallowed in self-pity over his hangover while you tried your best to avoid Logan’s eyes.

Dennis didn’t ask anymore questions about what had happened yesterday, but you were sure that he would bombard you with them once you’d left the apartment.

To top it all off, Liam made things even worse when he finally appeared from his room, wearing nothing but his boxers.

Only when Logan coughed, drawing attention to Dennis and you sitting around the table, did the Carlin driver notice you.

“Y/n? What are you doing here?”, he asked, obvious confusion in his voice.

Dennis took the opportunity.

“That’s what I’d like to know as well.”, his gloating smile was directed towards you, making you roll your eyes in annoyance.

That’s when Logan felt the need to say something.

“Let it go, Hauger. She needed a place to sleep after you almost threw up in our taxi.”

You stared hard at the coffee in your mug.

Liam laughed, Dennis raised his eyebrows.

“And that place was your bed?”, he wiggled with his eyebrow suggestively.

Only then did Liam realize what Dennis was implying. The Kiwi gasped.

“You slept together?!”

Logan rolled his eyes, clearly annoyed. You just stayed silent, holding your breath.

“No, we did not. We just slept in the same bed, get over yourself.”, Logan snapped, and you took a big sip of your coffee to avoid looking at anyone.

Dennis grinned like a child on Christmas Eve.

He’d finally gotten a reaction out of one of you.

“But you slept together in the same bed, correct?”, Dennis exchanged a glance with Liam. The Carlin driver was invested now and leaned onto the kitchen table.

Logan threw his hands up in the air. “What part of we didn’t sleep with each other did you not understand?”

“Then why did you make her your favorite coffee?”, Liam shot back, nodding towards the mug in your hands.

Dennis’ eyebrows almost shot up to his hairline while Logan’s face turned red within seconds.

You looked at the coffee in your mug, then checked what was in Dennis’ mug: tea.

Not coffee.

Liam saw the confusion on your face.

“He brings his special coffee blend along to every race we go to. Thinks it brings him good luck or something…He never lets anyone else have some, not even me.”, he explained.

Your heart was beating way too fast by now.

Logan was a riddle you just couldn’t figure out.

Now the three of you looked at Logan, whose face got even redder.

“It doesn’t mean anything.”, he tried to defend himself halfheartedly, but Liam laughed and Dennis joined in his laughter. Traitor.

“Yeah, sure mate. And tomorrow you’ll sign with McLaren.”, Liam didn’t believe a word of what Logan had said.

You however didn’t know what to believe anymore. The facts were that Logan had told you himself that he wanted to forget about this.

You couldn’t imagine that he’d lie to you.

“We didn’t sleep with each other.”, you commented suddenly, making all three of their heads turn in your direction.

You avoided looking into Logan’s eyes when you spoke.

“I could never sleep with Logan. You know my type, Dennis.”, maybe you should have chosen your words more carefully, but maybe you just wanted some revenge, to hurt Logan the same way he had hurt you.

Liam failed to hold back a laugh, but at least he patted Logan’s shoulder to console him.

Dennis nodded in contemplation, then shrugged.

“Makes sense, I guess.”

When your eyes met Logan’s, you swallowed heavy.

He looked at you with the same hurt expression you had had on earlier when he told you to forget about everything.

“Thanks again…for letting us stay.”, you said as you stepped out of the apartment, turning around to Logan.

After Liam had teased Logan about his special coffee for another annoying few minutes, the Kiwi had gone back to bed and you and Dennis had decided it would be best to get back to your own apartment.

“Sure.”, Logan answered with a tight-lipped smile, his demeanor having changed drastically ever since you’d said he wasn’t your type.

You’d noticed it right way: How closed off he had gotten towards you, not looking at you anymore, instead focussing entirely on making conversation with Dennis.

But Logan had been the first of the two of you to say something hurtful, and you had simply returned the favor.

You went to go after Dennis, who was already trotting down the stairs slowly.

“Y/n..”, Logan stopped you, making you turn around to him again.

“I..I wanted you to know that-“

“Don’t worry about it. Last night is long forgotten… my lips are sealed. You should rather check to make sure Liam won’t tell anyone though, because he’s definitely figured it out.”, you interrupted him quickly, not wanting to hear whatever he had to say.

You were already hurt enough that the last night hadn’t meant as much to him as it did to you.

Logan pressed his lips together, his hand wandering to the back of his neck.

“Yeah..yeah, you’re probably right…I’ll see you in France then?”

You shrugged, not sure whether you could pretend that nothing had changed between you and Logan in front the dozens of cameras.

“Maybe. I’ll be pretty busy.”

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lotties-ashwagandha · 2 years

Note

ur rhaenyra fics are all amazing !! i was wondering if you’d ever write for Alicent? maybe with a lady in waiting reader, or governess to her kids, whomst Ali would shower with affection and attention, that it may start whispering at the court but who cares bc the green queen loves her lady <3

YOUR LIPS, MY LIPS, APOCALYPSE

pairing: alicent hightower x fem!reader

word count: 602 (sorry it’s short i’ve been so busy!!)

notes and warnings: this is such a cute request omg,, title from “apocalypse” by cigarettes after sex

Gently, you buttoned her dress, glancing at her in the mirror from time to time. Her eyes exposed her exhaustion, yet though her expression betrayed the day’s anxieties, she also held a sense of ethereal peace.

You were Alicent’s lady in waiting, though titles meant next to nothing when the two of you were alone; you were her love, and she was yours, and nothing else mattered. The queen told you her every secret, every political plan, and every night and day you listened fervently to her rants and rambles.

The sun cast a gray-white glow through the window of Alicent’s bedchamber that made everything seem new, fresh. Her dark eyes gleamed in the gentle light, and every curl of her dark auburn hair was ethereal in the newness of the morning.

You leaned down to kiss her neck, feeling goosebumps arise on her skin. You rested your forehead on her shoulder for a moment, simply basking in her presence.

“What was that for?” She whispered, her voice angelic. When you looked up, she offered you a small smile in the mirror.

You shrugged, returning her smile as you got back to buttoning her dress. “You’re just very beautiful is all.”

Her face reddened a bit at your compliment, but she attempted to disguise it by turning to pick up her hairbrush.

“Let me,” you said in amusement, taking the brush from her. “I am your lady, after all.”

Alicent rolled her eyes. “I hate that it’s that way. There’s been whispering in the court, you know.”

“Let them whisper. There’s nothing they can prove.”

You began to arrange Alicent’s hair into an updo. The silence between you was one filled with comfort. No words were needed, for you had each other, and it was perfect.

“I have something for you,” Alicent said once you were done with her hair. She could barely contain her smile as she began to dig in her bedside table. Eventually she pulled out a small white cloth bag, handing it to you.

You raised your eyebrows and her smile only widened.

Inside the bag was a necklace of a hundred jewels, diamonds and sapphires strung together delicately and sparkling in the silver sunlight.

You could hardly breathe, your breath caught in your throat. “Alicent, it’s beautiful… what is it for?”

“Do I need an occasion to buy you pretty things?” Alicent teased. “Like you said… you’re my lady.”

You shook your head in amusement, your gaze fixed on the necklace.

“Turn around, I’ll put it on you.”

Her hands brushed your neck as she clasped the necklace and you shivered.

“It’s beautiful,” you said, looking into the mirror. “Thank you.”

“Only the finest for you, darling.”

The way the sun came through the windows, the way Alicent’s voice echoed so melodically off of the stone walls, made everything seem perfect. You wished never to leave this moment, for the mornings you spent together were everything. The rest of the day did not matter, for the best moments of your life had been spent when the sun went down and as it came up again.

“I wish we could spend every moment together,” you said softly.

“I do too,” Alicent agreed, her voice soft. “I suppose the times we spend unable to see each other, however, make our moments of privacy that much more sacred.”

And she said it as if every moment you spent with her was not sacred regardless.

The rest of the day faded from your mind as you turned and she kissed you, the rest of the world fading to complete and unbreakable silence.

#alicent hightower #hotd #house of the dragon #hightower #house hightower #lgbtq #alicent hightower x reader

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khoipyan · 2 years

Text

you’ve received a text!

headcanons of octavinelle’s texting styles when texting with you!

warnings; no major ones, hinted to be dating in azul’s and jade’s, can be seen as platonic or romantic

notes; snore mimimi.., FLOYD I LOVE YOU FLOYD LEECH FLOYD LEECH WAAAAAAHA SOBS SNIFF CRIES COUGH 😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️ im sorry

(notes have nothing to do with the fic i am just so in love with floyd)

azul ashengrotto

formal all the way. Capitalized letters, punctuation in place and even uses BIG BOY WORDS?!

when texting azul, he tries his best to keep formal even with you.

sometimes uses emojis, but very rarely and only with you. i think his favourites are 😊😓🤔 in the most non-joking way possible.

If he's in a rush or just happens to slip up, there may be a time where he forgets to put the proper punctuation endings (.?!,), but he'll be sure to correct himself in that moment.

EXTREMELY RARE but he might use acronyms (unless it's something like ASAP)? only because i can imagine him going:

"Love you, in a rush, TTYL. ❤️"

honestly an average speed texter but much better using a keyboard, probably owns a tablet with some sort of keyboard attachment.

barely uses the texting app on his phone because he's more used to emailing people. not enough for said messaging app to catch dust, but you get the idea.

(also kind of think he doesn't understand tone tags but he'll try if you want him to, not that he'll use them often but if you ask then he shall.)

jade leech

another formal texter... this time he doesn't slip up at all. sure, he'll make very infrequent typos, but he'll catch himself before he hits send.

bro does NOT use any of those yellow emojis to express how he is feeling over text. he's old fashioned.

generally doesn't use emojis unless with people he considers to be more than clientele (even if you guys are just seatmates or something), but when he does...

your two choices are :) or :(. that's it. maybe even the winking versions if he's feeling a tad bit extra.

regardless, he makes use of the emojis that aren't the people/yellow emojis. his favourite emoji has to be the mushroom one because he thinks it's cute despite the fact it doesn't realistically look like a mushroom at all.

(also yes, i know mushrooms with red caps speckled with white do exist, BUT DO NOT BE TELLING ME THOSE SPOTS ARE THAT BIG. maybe i'm in denial but THERES NO WAY.)

he'll be putting that mushroom emoji with anything.

"Did you have a good day today, dear? 🍄" "May I come over today? I wish to see your face again. 🍄" "Can you perhaps come over to Mostro Lounge today? Floyd wants to play with somebody, and you'll be able to see me while you're at it. 🍄"

literally the most random uses for the mushroom emoji.

it's ok we love jade for that

floyd leech

his texting habits are so irregular you don't even know WHAT to expect. usually does capitalize his letters at the start of his sentences, but sometimes he'll start capitalizing random words out of NO WHERE.

"Hey shrimpy..... wanna Play With me.... come Over to mostro im bored"

when he's upset he doesn't bother capitalizing anything, why put in the extra amount of work when you're moody?

emoji user REAL. typically anything you'd expect from genZ slang, to be honest. his favourites are 😱😇🤬☹️ and you know what, HE PROBABLY USES THOSE SHARK MEMOJIS BECAUSE HE THINKS IT'S FUNNY (and it is).

the most non-driest texter ever, also if you don’t respond to him within 0.0001 seconds he’ll start exploding your phone with spam messages (unless you’ve told him not to do that, then maybe he’ll only send 2-3 after-messages from then on)

has absolutely no intent of using proper punctuation, the type of guy to use multiple ellipses in one message.

honestly, his texting habits make him less intimidating than he actually is in reality.

— due to be edited at anytime —

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liliesonpandora · 1 year

Text

The First Peaceful Sleep

Sweet story of Neytiri and Lo’ak spending some time together after Neteyam’s death. They are still grieving, and Lo’ak feels like his father blames him. Neytiri comforts him and assures him that he is loved <3

Neytiri and Lo’ak returned from the village meeting, trying to enter the marui as quietly as possible. The moon shined brightly outside the pod, signifying another long night. Jake, Kiri and Tuk were laying together in the biggest hammock, fast asleep, not even stirring from the sounds the two made as they entered the home.

Jake was laying in the middle taking up most of the space, with one arm wrapped around Kiri’s waist and the other hand resting on Tuk’s head. Kiri’s head lay in the crook of his neck and shoulder while Tuk was sprawled over his chest, her little body rising and falling with his breathing. Her children looked so small next to him, but they were getting bigger every day. Everything moved so fast, Neytiri wished she cherished the days with them even more than she already had.

She smiled to herself as she watched them, and walked over to where they were in the hammock. Tuk was always such a reckless sleeper, but Jake loved that about her. And Kiri was soft and gentle… no matter what she did. She was a gift from the great mother. She looked at peace here in her father’s arms. She was glad they could have one moment of normalcy despite this war that continues to rage on.

Neytiri was happy to see her husband getting some well-needed rest. He has had little sleep since they buried Neteyam. He deals with the grief by putting his energy into work. He has been helping Tonowari with the rest of the clan and the cleanup of the battle… which is why Neytiri volunteered herself to go to the meeting in his place today. Ronal had asked for her anyway, wanting assistance from another Tsahik… well Tsahik-in-training technically. Neytiri had told Jake to stay back with the kids and get some sleep, and he reluctantly agreed. Lo’ak wanted to go to the meeting with his mom though, as he felt like he needed to help out more.

As Neytiri thought about all that’s happened here, she couldn’t help but wonder what would have happened if they stayed at home, with the rest of the Omaticaya. Would her eldest son still be alive?

Although she did not agree with Jake’s decision to flee, she always respected him and tried her best to trust him. He has always protected them before, and she didn’t know what she would do without him. They were a team regardless of the circumstances. All of Neytiri’s choices led her to this very moment.

She thought back to that faithful day where she spotted a dream-walker lost in the forest. When she trusted the sign of Ewya, lowered her bow, and chose to spare him. She looked at Jake as he lay sleeping with their daughters and she sighed. She loved him so much, and despite knowing what she knows now… she would choose him every time.

Neytiri placed a kiss on her daughters’ and husband’s foreheads. When she did this, Jake’s eyes drifted open and focused on his wife.

He smiled softly at her. “You’re back.”

“Mhm. It ran very late. I’ll fill you in tomorrow,” she spoke softly.

“Where is Lo’ak? Is he okay?”

Lo’ak looked up when he heard his name and Neytiri glanced back at him. He was sitting in the corner with his knees pulled up to his chest.

“Our son is here and he is fine. You can go back to sleep my beloved,” she said while she stroked his cheek with her thumb.

He leaned into the warmth of her hand with his face and let his eyes close.

“Are the girls making you uncomfortable? Shall I put them in their beds?”

“No, I’m fine. Don’t wake them,” he murmured with his eyes still closed. She smiled at him once more and turned to her son.

“Lo’ak, do you want to sleep?” She asked him.

“No, I’m wide awake now,” he said as he traced the woven pattern on the floor beneath him.

“So am I,” Neytiri responded. “Are you hungry?”

“Not really.” Lo’ak was now staring at his father and sisters sleeping, and Neytiri wondered what the look on his face meant.

“Come my love, let’s sit and talk then.”

“Wont we wake them?”

“They’ll be okay, they’re heavy sleepers.”

She reached her hand out to him and he took it while smiling at her and moving to sit next to her.

She put an arm around him, pulled him close, and rest her head on top of his. “My son, tell me what’s on your mind.”

Lo’ak took a deep breath and tried to speak the words without crying, but he couldn’t.

“I miss him, mom” his voice trembled and the tears streamed quickly down his face, as if he was holding this in all day.

Neytiri cupped his face with one hand while the other remained around his shoulder. She wiped his tears away with her thumb. She broke down when seeing her son like this and she began to tear up as well.

“I know you do, my love. He’s your older brother, he should be here with you. Im so sorry you had to lose him and suffer like this.” She hugged him tighter.

Lo’ak looked up at her, “No, Im sorry mom. I convinced him to go back to get Spider, if it wasn’t for me, he-“

“Stop.” Neytiri cut him off before he could continue.

“It is not your fault. And I don’t want to hear you saying something like that again. Those demons killed your brother. Not you.”

Lo’ak closed his eyes tightly and shoved his face into his mom’s embrace to muffle his cries.

This pained her so much. She held him like this for a while and waited until his breathing regulated.

“Look at me,” she told him. He didnt move.

She released him and took his face in her hands but he refused to open his eyes. Neytiri’s lips trembled as she looked at her son.

“Lo’ak please,” she begged and Lo’ak opened his eyes when he heard his mother’s pleading voice.

“It is our job as parents to protect you and your siblings. And we failed you.” Her voice cracked as she said this and more tears fell. “Don’t you ever think that you’re responsible.” She took a deep breath. “I wish you didn’t have to grow up in this world, so quickly like this. Its not fair and I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t cry mom.” Lo’ak reached up to caress his mother’s face. “It’s not your fault either.”

“I appreciate you, my love.”

She hugged him tightly and Lo’ak layed his head on his mother’s chest while she stroked his hair. They once again looked at each other’s tear-stained faces and let out a chuckle. They sat for a while in the silence and it felt nice… to just be with each other.

“Come, I’ll loosen your braids and we can re-do them in the morning however you like,” Neytiri offered to her son.

“Okay.”

Lo’ak sat crosslegged on the floor of the marui and his mom kneeled behind him to begin working on his hair.

She always played in her children’s hair to get them to fall asleep; it was her best trick and it still worked even now when they were teenagers. But in this moment, she just wanted to spend some time with her son. It’s been too long.

She worked quietly for a while, trying to be very gentle so he would feel relaxed.

Apparently this was not working because Lo’ak soon broke the silence.

“I know you don’t blame me mom… but does he?” Lo’ak gestured to his sleeping father.

“No, he could never,” Neytiri answered swiftly.

“It feels like he does.”

This pained Neytiri to hear her son say… even though she knew Jake was acting a bit distant from Lo’ak these days.

She wanted to reassure him. “Your father has been grieving in his own way. He wants to busy himself with work so he doesn’t have enough time to feel pain. He also feels at fault for bringing war to these people, so he has been distant… preoccupied. But he does not blame you.”

“That sounds like an excuse. He can barely look at me sometimes. I see how he is around me. He doesn’t treat Tuk and Kiri that way. It’s just me.”

“You know your dad has always treated your sisters differently from you and your brother. He babies them.”

Neytiri knew she was struggling to defend her husband’s actions. She didn’t like how Jake was so harsh, but she understood why he needed to be that way.

Lo’ak seemingly ignored her response and continued, “I will never live up to the great Toruk Makto. I’m nothing like him.”

“He was not always that great warrior. You know… you are more like your father than you think.”

“Really?” Lo’ak asked in disbelief.

“Mhm. When I first met him, he did so many troublesome things. He went head-first into danger every time. He had no fear. You must have gotten it from him,” said Neytiri.

Lo’ak laughed lightly at this and Neytiri felt better that she made him smile. But she wanted him to understand.

“When he looks at you, he is reminded of himself…so much so that it scares him.”

Lo’ak turns to his mother in surprise at this.

“Dad? Scared?”

“Mhm. Don’t tell him I told you this as he would rather not worry you… but he is fearful of losing you. All of you. Back where he is from, he had no family. He was all alone, and he lost his brother too. But now he has all of us, and he loves us so much. Unfortunately his fear turns into anger when you get into trouble, but he just wants to keep you safe. He was trained to be a soldier when he was very young… you know this story. He raised you boys so harshly because he didnt know how else to do it. When the sky people left back then, we did not imagine that they would return the way they did. Well, at least not so quickly, and so much bigger and more powerful. And especially not while our children were still so young.”

Lo’ak was quiet, taking in this information.

“Your dad’s worst fear came true when we lost Neteyam. He doesn’t want us to see it, but he is falling apart and trying to keep everything together.”

Lo’ak turned back to look at his mom when it sounded like she started to cry again.

“So, please try to understand okay?” She asked him.

“I understand a bit more now, Mom. Thanks for telling me.”

“You deserve to know his true feelings. Im sorry he is taking so long to tell you himself, but give him some time. The wound is still fresh for all of us. He is making mistakes now, but he will correct them… he always does.”

“Okay, mom.”

“You look like him,” she says with a smile and she kisses his temple.

“I know. I got his fingers, toes, and his eyebrows to prove it,” Lo’ak responds in annoyance.

“You got all his handsome features, too.”

Lo’ak smiled to himself as he heard this. He has always gotten bullied for looking differently. He was often called a “freak,” just like his older sister. But there was a small part of him that liked being the only biological child to resemble his father in this way. It made him feel closer to him, and sometimes, it was the only thing he had.

Neytiri finished loosening Lo’ak’s braids and brushed his hair to remove all the knots. Then she placed another kiss on his cheek and wrapped her arms around him from behind.

He held onto her forearms with both hands and they stayed like that for a little while. Her hugging him… her head over his shoulder and their cheeks lightly pressed together. A mother and son.

Lo’ak closed his eyes and breathed deeply. Its been so long since his mom held him like this. He got scolded so often, that he forgot how much he yearned for this affection from his parents. He tried to take it in, and cherish it.

His mom released him and gestured for him to lay his head in her lap. “Lay down, baby.”

Lo’ak did as she said, and she began to caress his head and run her hands through his hair. He felt the fatigue take over but he refused to sleep… not wanting to waste any time with his mother.

She spoke softly to him, “my son please remember this. No matter how stubborn and troublesome you may be at times, I see you… and I know you are so much more.”

Lo’ak turned his face up to look at her and she smiled warmly down at him.

“You are compassionate, warm-hearted, and headstrong. You are determined and hardworking. And you have so much love to give. All of you kids do. You saved us and we are so grateful for you. Your father and I have so much to learn from you. I love you so much.”

After hearing his mothers words, Lo’ak felt full inside… after a period of feeling only emptiness.

“I love you too, mom.”

“Its very late… lets sleep now, okay?”

“Okay,” Lo’ak was already drifting into sleep as he said this, he could no longer fight it.

Once she knew he was asleep, Neytiri carefully lifted his head from her lap and lay him on the cushioning of their sleeping mat. She spooned him from behind and interlocked her four fingers with his five.

As she relaxed and inhaled her son’s scent, she felt sleepiness overcome her. She had not noticed how tired she actually was. She let her eyes close and in a few short moments, she fell asleep to the sounds of her loved ones breathing. It was the first peaceful sleep she has had in a while.

Got randomly inspired to write about these two. I hope we get to see more of their relationship in the future. I love Lo’ak as a character and he deserves the world! Hope you enjoyed :)

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