#CAN CONFIRM - there were some tears shed

[wexhappyxfew]

shannon hi!! i've been eyeing bessie and thomas for a while, so could i ask for them and the prompt "smiling by instinct when they see the other/breaking into a grin and being unable to stop it" from the subtle otp prompts? thank youu and happy ttpd day!! ;)

BLU!!!! HELLO!!!! the fact it's been such a long-time-coming getting to this prompt, so very sorry for that lol! college finals hit and i was swamped and *NOW* we have some time haha! pleased to say, you are my final prompt from my prompt collection (and we can tell how long ago that was - i happily enjoyed ttpd day more than ANYTHING and i hope you did too!! <3 lets just say ive been looping 'loml' for some reason haha!!) THIS PROMPT!!!! literally for bessie and tommy i was obsessed with and went to town.....and then i went back and added a bunch of stuff because i went this is for BLU!!!! SO, i hope you enjoy these two!!! <3

my bessie marie

(a/n): blu, my #1 bessie x tommy stan, please enjoy this look into the before and after of their lives <3 bessie carlisle is an absolute joy to write - from her good-hearted nature, willingness to be kind and caring to all, her steadfast and natural call to doing what is right and her easy-going humor - by far one of my favorite Silver Bullets girls to write! <3 she just always has such a presence in scenes for me - so please enjoy her and tommy! :D

Bessie Carlisle had always been in love with Tommy McKenzie down the street ever since she was little.

And that was just a fact.

She always lived by the truth, by the facts and by the book.

So usually when things went off the page, in a different direction than intended - that's when life started to go haywire. That's probably why she excelled in school - everything was either fact, truth, or reality. Things were what they were at the end of the day. Attending Barnard College had opened up more opportunities than she could imagine and with Tommy right in Columbia, they'd been able to get closer to one another more often than not in those times, sharing all those secret promises amongst one another before finally admitting their feelings their junior years. And since then, they'd been inseparable, side-by-side, doing everything and anything they could together. And it had all been fact, truth and reality.

Dinner on January 4th, 1942 changed that.

"Bes, honey!" her mom called up the stairs to her, as she slammed her book closed and came to the threshold to her room, hearing the doorbell ring, "Tommy's here, dear - we'll be eating in a bit though, your father's not home yet!"

"Coming!" Bessie called, a smile riding her features as she quickly turned to the little mirror above her dresser and smoothed out her baby blue dress, fixing the small collar and turned to hurry down the stars like she was a 16-year-old lovesick girl again.

Coming to the front door, she pulled open the golden handle and there stood on the other side was her Tommy McKenzie with that beautiful glowing grin on his face. A smile broke out on her own cheeks as she stepped forward and launched her arms around his neck, pulling him into her embrace, relishing the comfort it brought to have his arms wrap right around her at the contact.

"How's my Bessie Marie?" he whispered quietly in her ear, a small laugh leaving her lips as she gave him an extra tight squeeze before pulling back and resting her hands on his arms, meeting those bright blue eyes that never left her mind.

She was never just Bessie to him - always Bessie Marie. And supposedly, from some of his friends, he'd started calling her Bessie Marie at the end of high school, and they had teased him about it for years. And now she got to be his Bessie Marie.

"Happy. Happier now that you're here," she said with a grin, catching her eyes on the book in his hand, "new book?" Tommy grinned at her, before swooping down to press a kiss to her cheeks.

"Billie wanted to give it to you," Tommy said, pulling the book from hands and gently handing it to her with another one of his winning grins that had quite honestly won her over in the first place, "he knows how much you love to learn more about the lay of the land. You should've seen how excited he was to get it to you. He would've been standing here by my side if I didn't tell him I was going over for dinner and not just a hangout." Bessie broke out into laughter as she looked down to the book cover and found it entitled A Deeper Understanding into the Geography of the Appalachians.

Tommy's 13-year-old brother, Billie McKenzie, was by far one of the smartest people she knew and someone she'd become incredibly fond of with family dinners at the McKenzie's, along with library trips. He always had the best books and it always made her heart warm to know he was thinking of her when getting books out.

"Found it and he swore up and down that he had to give it to you," Tommy said, sticking his hands in his pockets and rocking back and forth on the balls of his feet, "you mentioned the Appalachians one time and he zeroed in on it." Bessie let out a chuckle and looked back up at Tommy, reaching up a hand to cup his cheek, her thumb delicately brushing against his soft skin, the quietness of his gaze holding that smile on her lips.

"I love it," she whispered softly, "thank you, my Tommy Dean." And yeah, she got to be his Bessie Marie, but he was her Tommy Dean.

That was their thing with each other. And it felt so sacred and special that she would never let it go.

Tommy smiled at her, and God his smile got her heart going in all sorts of directions, before he reached forward, his fingertips delicately resting on her waist, pulling her closer to him, flush against his tall and broad form, that soft smile gracing his lips.

Gently, he pressed his lips onto hers, and she could feel all her worries about school, what was going on across the Atlantic and Pacific, and every other horror that existed in this world drip away.

But, something in her stomach felt off, something about the hold he had on her, that look in his starry-eyes, like it was the last time he'd see her, made her uneasy. She pulled back from the kiss for a moment and looked into his eyes boring into hers. Her smile fell a bit - despite the fact they'd only been together for a year, they'd been friends, the best of friends much longer, and she could pick out anything that was wrong with him in a second.

"You okay, Tommy?" she asked him quietly, her eyes turning sad with the way he was watching her. Something deep down was telling her something was wrong, but she couldn't figure it out.

Tommy was already set for graduation, alongside her in early May - he was going to get involved in his father's business and go for an even higher degree. And they'd talked about it all - their future, staying in New York City or moving to the suburbs - they'd talked about marriage. All of it. Kids, a family, a black cat named Milo. But something was off. Something that made her want to hold Tommy as close to her as she could and tell him whatever was wrong would make things alright again.

"Yeah." Tommy whispered quietly, the corners of his lips struggling into a smile, "Just…." He stared at her a little longer than he normally did, his gaze roaming every inch of her face, like he was trying to memorize each and every aspect of her face from her lips, to the freckles across her cheeks and nose, to that scar on her forehead from the fall she had taken as a kid when playing with the local kids outside.

"Just what?" Bessie asked him quietly, reaching up to brush a piece of his brunette hair behind his ear - she really loved his hair - soft, lush, always beautifully combed and gelled. She loved him.

"Ask me again later." he said quietly, "Your mother's meal smells delicious." He smiled at that and Bessie couldn't help but feel her heart sag. Her gut was still telling her that something was off, something was wrong and she needed to figure it out.

Bessie smiled at him though, and took his arm, shutting the front door behind her as they waded into the family dining room where her mother was setting the giant roast she had cooked up - beef, carrots, onions, celery, potatoes, with a house-made salad and a champagne bottle to top it off along the table.

"Oh, Tommy, how are you, honey." her mother said, coming towards Tommy with open arms, pulling him into her.

Her mother loved Tommy McKenzie with her whole heart - she was always cooking him extra things; just last week, she had baked up strawberry scones, but made an extra blueberry one because she knew it was his favorite. She usually kept old newspapers and cut out different clippings she thought he'd like, along with always setting an extra spot at the table incase he'd be stopping by.

Her father was just as loving towards Tommy as her mother - probably more so. Her father loved having daughters, he always spoke proudly on it, but in a way, it healed that youthful boy part of her father, to have someone who was like a son. They talked politics, baseball, economics - everything. They'd sit outside at night, share a cigar or a cigarette, talking about life. They'd have a laugh and real heartfelt conversations. Her father usually made sure to invite him out when he could, or bring up opportunities that he heard about.

Bessie's little sisters loved Tommy, too. At 17 and 14, Jillian and Krissy Carlisle were always loving on Tommy when they could and if anything, Tommy had taught them the proper way to be loved right back.

"I'm doing well, Mrs. Carlisle, how about yourself?" he said, pulling back and squeezing her mother's arm gently, "Food smells delicious."

"Well, I knew you were coming, dear, and we can never have enough food," she said with laughter that sounded like Bessie's own, "go on, have a seat. Bessie, can you go grab some napkins?"

"Sure, Mom." Bessie said, looking to Tommy with a grin, before she stepped past them and into the kitchen, where she found Jillian and Krissy sitting there and giggling.

"What's got you two all giggly?" Bessie said, coming in and grabbing from the stack of napkins her mother always had in the corner, "Is that Joey Spinelli still coming around knocking, Jill?" Jillian let out a laugh and shook her head.

"Maybe-" Jillian started, but Krissy bounced up.

"He's in love with her! I swear!" Krissy said, "You gotta start asking Tommy what it means when a guy offers to buy your ice cream and not anyone else's - do you think he likes her?" Bessie looked to Jillian and raised a brow, watching as her sister's cheeks turned red.

"He bought only your ice cream, hm?" Bessie said with a smile, leaning back against the sink, "Jillian Cassidy Carlisle, when were you going to tell me this?"

"I didn't think anything of it!!" Jillian swore standing to her feet and waving her arms, "We were in a group, I was near the back, he offered because he was in the group, too. He was just being nice!" Krissy scoffed and crossed her arms.

"Just being nice my ass-"

"Watch your language, Kristen." Bessie said with a look to Krissy who pouted and crossed her arms.

"Ask the romance books, Jilly, you'll see otherwise." Krissy offered back.

"Romance books?" Bessie heard Tommy's voice say as he entered the kitchen, ducking through the entrance a bit because of his height, "Didn't think you'd be reading those yet, Krissy."

"Tommy! Tomo!" Krissy yelled excitedly, forgetting about her previous admonishment with Jillian and racing towards him, and jumping into his arms for a hug, "You won't believe it, Tomo!" her nickname for him, "Joey Spinelli down the street is in love with Jilly and she doesn't believe it!" Tommy let out a chuckle and glanced at Jillian standing there, red in the face and pouting.

"You sure about that?" Tommy asked Krissy who nodded."He bought her ice cream. The only one out of the group." Krissy offered.

"He was just being nice." Jillian surmised and placed her hands on her hips, "That's it." Tommy let out a chuckle, before Krissy let go of him and he looked to Jillian.

"Joey Spinelli, huh?" he asked her and Jillian nodded, "You know, I know his older brother - Luca Spinelli, I could ask hi-"

"Don't you dare, Tommy!" Jillian said, her cheeks turning a deeper red as she reached out and gave his shoulder a shove, "I can't face that." Tommy let out a chuckle as Krissy looked to Jillian with a smart look.

"You know Tommy bought dinner for Bessie that one time-"

"We were already dating, Krissy-"

"It counts!" Krissy said looking to Bessie, "Isn't that right, Tomo?"

"Sure, kiddo." Krissy proudly looked to Jillian.

"Party in the kitchen?" Everyone turned to find her father walking into the kitchen, work bag on his shoulder, suit looking as pristine as ever and a smile on his face.

"Dad!" Krissy called excitedly, as Bessie went over and hugged her father, Tommy shaking his hand and Jillian hugging her father jus as tight.

"How's it going, Mr. Carlisle?" Tommy asked her father as he pulled his work bag off.

"Same old, same old," her father said with another one of his winning smiles that hers looked nearly identical to, "stock market's up." Tommy laughed.

"Always a good day to hear that," he said and Bessie watched her father laugh.

"Alright, dinner is set, everyone bundle in!" her mother called coming into the kitchen, pressing a kiss to her father's cheek. People chattered as they went to settle into chairs and pulled napkins onto laps, Bessie placing the stack of napkins she had pulled from the stack onto the middle of the table, before everyone was settled in. They said prayer, and then everyone sat awaiting when they would be allowed to dig in.

"May I say something real quick?" Tommy asked from beside Bessie, his voice a bit more solid and confident than it had been when she first had opened the door to him. She watched him for a moment, and her parents exchanged glances with each other before encouraging him on.

"Go on, Tommy," her mother said with a smile. Jillian and Krissy looked to Bessie who could only shrug. Tommy cleared his throat.

"I just….I wanted to thank you all for being like a second family to me. More than anything. Feeding me, taking care of me, allowing me to be with your beautiful daughter, Bessie Marie," he said with a smile, before reaching out and taking a grip on Bessie's hand and squeezing it tight, "and I felt it was important to tell you all this now that we're all here. Because it matters to all of you and to me and especially to Bessie." Bessie watched him.

"I enlisted. For the Marines." he said, his voice sounding slightly constrained in his throat as he spoke, "And I ship out for training in a month."

Bessie woke up to knocking on the door. Her head pounded, her mind was scrambled, and her heart ached. Jack Kidd had come and sought her out with a tapping on the door to the women's barracks, where the front door had an interesting poster saying Silver Bullets.

Marianne had gracefully painted the sign one evening until Frank, that pesky orange cat, had gotten the one corner of it and nearly tore it to shreds. Now, it hungry quite lopsided with teeth marks in the side. Judy surmised that is gave it some character. They all went along with that.

Annie had answered the door, looking half like she had fallen out of bed to get to the door and then had shaken Bessie awake at the call. Bessie came hurrying to the door, sticking her crusher cap on her head and attempting her best to get the tie on herself before following after Kidd to the mess hall.

"What's up?" she asked him - the thing with Jack Kidd was, he was firm, to the point and ironed things out into straight lines - but she had been just the same back to him and had earned the capability to not have to therefore, be so formal. Not everyone was like that but Bessie…..let's just say, she'd attended college before with plenty of stuck up pricks with enough money it was coming out of their eyeballs. Jack Kidd wasn't like that, but he seemed to get along with her capability to maintain herself above water with the higher-ups. Therefore, 'what's up' was probably the most pleasant thing she could've said.

"Seems that making me Air Exec was the most recent decision with that new Colonel Harding showing up - West Point guy." Kidd said and Bessie raised a brow.

"Damn, Air Exec, you look thrilled," Bessie said and Kidd sighed and glanced at her.

"Demoted Bucky then?" He nodded and she made a clicking noise with her mouth and nodded.

"So, what's that gotta do with me?" she asked him, stopping him and looking his way with a smile, "There a reason I'm up as the sun's rising, or is this just for fun?"

"Figured you could give us some extra hands in Operations, flight paths and all. You'll still fly in Silver Bullets, but I trust you more right now than some of these other guys with all these variables moving about." he said, "You'd get a new title, too."

"New title, huh? Which is?"

"Lieutenant. Lieutenant Carlisle. 1st that is."

"Intriguing."

"Take it or leave is, Bes, we got work to do."

"Alright, deal." she said, and followed him towards Operations. Opening the door for her, she stepped inside and removed her cap to find a group of the navigators all awake and huddled around the center table, talking quietly with one another and sending each other looks.

"What's this, Jack, a get-together or an intervention?" she murmured to her side and watched as Jack shut his eyes and sighed.

"Gathered all the navigators up. Seems like in coming missions, they want to go deeper into Germany," he said, catching her eye, "wasn't my plan. Not ideal. But it's what's happening." Bessie looked away from him and caught Crosby's eye, who removed himself from the group and came up and over to her.

"Met Harding yet?" he asked her, giving a salute to Jack, "He's been extra curious about your crew."

"Afraid not, Croz, but if he happens to stop in this morning, I'll be sure to shake his hand and butter him up," Bessie said, before giving him a smile and nodding to the rest of the navigators, "Boys. How's it going?"

"Morning, Bes." A few greetings came as she moved in beside Croz and stared down at the map of continental Europe in front of them and the formations of planes scattered about. For about half an hour, the group went over ideas, as well as drawn-out arguments for what the plan was for the next mission. And it wasn't until nearly about lunch time when they were dismissed, did a runner come in from outside, calling her name.

"Lieutenant Carlisle?" Bessie turned from her conversation with Crosby and walked over to the runner, who held out a letter in his hand and smiled at her quickly, "For you, ma'am, seemed urgent." Then he was gone, the letter was in her hand and her heart was racing.

Slowly, she looked at the front and there it was, her name, in his handwriting. She hadn't realized she missed until she had started getting his letters and seen him signing it as Bessie M. Carlisle. She didn't realize she'd been standing there frozen until she was heading outside and peeling open the letter in a rushed frenzy just to read it.

Dear Bessie Marie,

Just staring at those first words, she couldn't remember the last time she'd gotten a letter from him. A few weeks? Nearly a month? He had said the fighting had been bad. She didn't know how bad, he never did tell, probably not to freak her out or get her riled up. He knew that sort of stuff always did her in. He knew her too well sometimes. But just seeing those few words at the top had her breaking out in a wide grin, knowing he'd held that paper, writing to her, in that delicate bit of handwriting, just for her eyes to read. He usually always got that grin she wore right now on her face, even when he wasn't around. Even halfway across the ocean.

Dear Bessie Marie,

I'm sorry it has taken me a bit to find some footing and get to some letter writing. The war out here has been downright horrid and I wouldn't even want to try describing the horrors we have encountered here to you. I have no doubt, telling from your last letter, that you are experiencing the same in your own ways, if not worse in those flying birds. No doubt I must have worried you, and I'm sorry for that. As I sit and write here now, one of our younger guys, Armstrong, is sick with a fever and the shakes - he tells me he's been trying to write to his family, but he can't seem to think straight or hold a pencil long enough to get his thoughts out. I've been helping him the best I can, especially at night and usually the letter writing takes a whole lot of time then. But a lot of the guys just want to get those letters out, just want to make sure their families know they're okay. So, I didn't mean to worry you, Bessie Marie, just know I am safe.

I got a recent promotion; my Senior Officer thought I'd be suited best for moving up in the ranks. You can consider me your Lieutenant Tommy McKenzie now! I still have my guys with me - Armstrong and Godfrey included, those two goons, but I enjoy their presence so. As well as all the others I've been with. I think it's because of how fast we lose guys out here, they can't be switching you all around, up and down, sideways and back. They keep you where you're comfortable for the time being.

I hope you've been doing well though, my Bessie Marie. I know I write it every time, but it is me in my truest form that I can not wait to get back to you in Brooklyn. Just the two of us, in our own home, going about our everyday lives side by side. I wish things were that simply again, back home. I guess as a kid I thought going out and fighting this sort of war was all I ever wanted. But I think what I wanted most was just for things to be normal again. For you and I to have our own place, start a family, finishing out schooling, get comfortable. Dance at night, have dinners together, have our friends over, spend our nights side by side. I wish I hadn't wanted to race into my adulthood as fast as we both seemed to.

I hope your crew is doing well - Annie Bradshaw sounds like she's got herself in order to be leading the plane, especially after what happened to your Birdie. I'm really sorry again for those circumstances, and if I could hug you from this island I'm on, I would. Bradshaw sounds good though - I don't think the Air Force would make the same mistake twice. Tell the other women I said hi, and let Judy know that Godfrey's been enjoying the book she recommended. Little Women I believe? He found it on the shelves out here when he was sent on medical for a little while. Came back raving about the March family, he loved it I must say!

Bessie Marie, please know I count the days until we can be together again. For now, stay safe, write back whenever you possibly can, and know I am thinking of you across this war-torn sea. I love you with all of my heart and there isn't a day that goes by where I don't think of you. Stay safe in flight, my love!

Yours,

Tommy McKenzie

Bessie stared at the letter with an onslaught of wet tears in her eyes, but unable to keep the smile from her face and truly feel those grieving emotions previously. Even if she couldn't look upon him fully, she could still see his face in her mind and that look he always gave her. Tommy McKenzie would always find a way to make her laugh even if she couldn't see it on his face. She smiled, wiping at the emotions crawling down her cheeks and let out a shaky sigh.

"Hey, Carlisle, you okay?" Bessie looked up and found Crosby coming towards her, hands shoved in his pockets, a concerned look on his face as he approached - if anything, Crosby was one of her closest companions outside of the girls and someone who looked out for her on the daily.

"Yeah, yeah," she said quickly, wiping carelessly at her cheeks again and letting out a sigh, "what's up?" Crosby watched her for a moment and then quirked out a grin.

"I asked you first." Bessie stared at him; she rolled his eyes and stepped forward to wrap an arm around his shoulders as they walked back towards the door to the inside of Operations.

"Must it always be how I am, what about you, Croz?" she said, squeezing his shoulders lightly, "Please, enlighten me." Crosby looked over at her and shrugged.

"You were the one outside."

"You were the one that came to find me."

"Key word, Carlisle; I came to find you." Crosby said with a chuckle, before his face dropped, "Seriously what's up." Bessie watched him for a moment as they continued to walk and then sighed.

"Nothing." she surmised, "Just….a letter from Tommy that's all." Crosby caught her gaze.

"Good, I'd assume?" Bessie smiled and nodded.

"Good." she said softly and then felt her smile widen, "Good."

[nkogneatho]

𝐉𝐉𝐊 𝐌𝐄𝐍 𝐀𝐒 𝐃𝐀𝐃𝐒 (𝑭𝑨𝑻𝑯𝑬𝑹'𝑺 𝑫𝑨𝒀 𝑺𝑷𝑪𝑳)

—cw: fem!reader, diabetes worth fluff, soft and protective dads, megumi, tsumiki as yours and toji's kids, mention of childhood trauma in geto's, dad jokes, not proofread

—a/n: I hope you shed a tear and laugh out loud. Don't let this flop. I actually wrote all of these from my personal emotions and experiences :)) Reblogs appreciated.

#mlist #art commissions #taglist

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗ TELL ME WHO WAS YOUR FAVORITE DAD!!! ༊*·˚

𝐆𝐎𝐉𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐑𝐔 .ೃ࿐

All these jjk women clowning gojo makes me think his daughter roasts him at every chance she gets. It's not even on purpose. It's just wise words out of a child's mouth.

"Hana-chan~" he calls her in a sugar laced tone. "How do I look in this?" Satoru pointed towards the awful shirt he was wearing. The outfit was all over the place. It was so bad that even your five year old could tell it.

"Papa's good at fighting, not fashion." His jaw immediately dropped and he could hear you trying to control your laugh.

He knelt so he could be a little more "Hana-chan, don't be mean to papa. It's making me cry."

"She's not being mean, baby. Just telling the truth. I'll divorce you if you wear that one more time," you stated, walking towards both of them.

"Oh yeah," he picks the five year old in his embrace, "I'd fight your lawyer. Daddy's the strongest. Right, hana-chan?"

"But you lost the argument to mama las' night." It was amazing how she can sounds so sweet while ripping your husband apart. You finally laughed out loud because you just couldn't control it.

You would expect Toru to put up an argument at times like this but he just giggles, and squeezes you both in a tight hug.

Yeah. He might be the strongest, but he'd always loose to his two girls.

𝐅𝐔𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐎 𝐓𝐎𝐉𝐈 .ೃ࿐

Your four year old and seven year old were determined to surprise their daddy for father's day. Toji never credits himself. He does so much, but expects nothing back. The thought of "what my kids might gift me for father's day" doesn't even strike his mind. He goes out and sees all the decorations on the stores with big glittered alphabets spelling "happy father's day" that's how he comes to know about it. Yet, the man wouldn't expect anything. He knows you three love him. He just doesn't want anything in return. His love doesn't come at a price for you all to pay. So when he came home to utensils clanking to the ground, he was worried.

"Oné-san, no. That's not how I wanted yout two write," megumi complained.

"Megumi, I am older. I know what to do." They both were trying to dominate each other on what to write on the cake. When they heard Toji's footsteps, the little boy pushed you towards the kitchen entrance.

"Mama, don't let papa come in now." You were laughing as you get kicked out of your own kitchen.

"Hey, sweetheart. I heard some noise. 's everything alright?" Toji gave you a quick peck after the question.

"Oh? Oh that yeah! Everything's fine. I just dropped the pan."

"Are ya hurt?" His eyes look completely concerned.

"Uh hun, I am fi—" before you could complete the sentence, your two cute munchkins came squealing, holding the little cake with small hands.

You moved your figure out of the way so your man can see what his kids made for him.

"Happy father's day, papa." They both wished him with a hearty smile. Toji was surprised. His heart suddenly warmed up to the feeling of the view in front of him. His two babies with flour patches on their tees, tsumiki's messy bun and megumi with cream near his lips, confirming he must've snuck in a taste when his sister was looking away. He wanted to cry.

You looked down and noticed there was a spelling mistake with the word "world" on the cake which was supposed to spell "to best daddy in the world"

"Gumi, Tsumiki, there's a mis—" Toji looked at you and shaked his head, speaking with his looks, telling you to not say it. He did notice it, but he didn't care about the mistake. All he wanted now was to gobble down the cake that his babies made. He pat them both on the head, ruffling their hair. "Thank you, little bears. Lesgo' enjoy this and then papa will take you and mama to the game world you like."

With the way he is looking at them, you're sure he'd eat that cake even if it was poison.

𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐔𝐆𝐔𝐑𝐔 .ೃ࿐

Geto didn't think he'll ever have kids, but when he was gifted with twin girls, he claims he is the luckiest person alive ever since.

He loves spoiling his little girls. He takes them shopping, pampers them all the time, helps them learn their nursery rhymes. If they ever were to grow up being too bratty, you are prepared to blame him because he never scolds them. He would dare not to. But that is the thing about kids. You don't yell at them. You don't have to be so harsh. You just have to ease it in and make them understand how their wrongdoings can affect others, hurt others as well as themselves.

Something always triggered inside you when you saw him being soft with Rumi and Arohi. You wished you were treated that way in your childhood. You only thought about them being bratty if not yelled, because that's what your childhood was like.

You were working on some documents, when you heard the door unlocking. Rumi and Arohi walked in with their pink bunny bags on their back.

"Mama, we're home!!" they squealed and ran into your arms, as you quickly set the files aside.

"Aww, seems like you had fun without mama. Where's your dad?"

"There." They pointed at the 3 foot box with legs on the door.

"AH! OH MY GOD. Who are you? How did you get in?" Your mother instincts hid the girls behind your back, as you tried to find something to hit the man with.

"Y/N, NO. IT'S ME," the box monster yelled. He moved his head revealing his fox eyes and you could recognize him.

"Suguru? Oh dear."

"A little help please," his voice felt struggled. You quickly sprinted towards the door, and helped him trying to get the box on the floor only two reaveal all the bags he had behind him.

"Did you guys buy the whole store? And what's this? A lego set?"

"That's for you, mama," Rumi stated.

"Yes mama, we got it for you. The biggest one in the store," said Arohi, running towards her shopping bag filled with toys.

"Suguru, for me? Why?"

"Darling. I always see you doing so much for us," his palms now cupped your cheek. "It broke my heart when you told me that story when you wanted the lego set but the responsibile daughter in you felt you did nothing to achieve it so why ask for it. Well here you go."

"I still don't understand," you shaked your head.

"Y/n. It's okay to spoil yourself. You don't always have to work hard to give yourself a little love. These things that you wanted were always yours even if all you did was try." Tears started streaming down your eyes. You felt the seven year old girl in you finally smile.

"Rumi-chan. Arohi-chan. Let's play with mama's gift." All three started sabotaging the tapes and lables in the big blue box.

You felt happy to have this family. You know why he's a great father? Because Suguru doesn't care for two kids. He spoils three. Your daughters, and that little girl in you who wished to have all that you do today.

𝐍𝐀𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐈 𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐎 .ೃ࿐

A man like nanami will always be a great father. No doubt. But here's one thing you probably don't know about Nanami Kento.

He's a full time salaryman, and part time comedian. Well...probably the worst one because his dad jokes are awful. You wanna know how it started in the first place, right? So it was when you were feeding the two year old the baby food, that you suddenly heard your phone ringing. Kento quicky replaced your place and took over the feeding as you walked towards the hall.

"Aww look at you. Aren't you the cutest baby in the world?" He took the spoon off the alligator cartooned bowl and extended it near her mouth. "Do you want to hear daddy's joke?"

Three mintues later you walked in two the sound of your little girl giggling and laughing. She's never laughed so loud.

"Oh my god. She's laughing."

"Yes. I made her laugh, beloved." Kento looked so happy with the biggest smile.

"Really? What did you do?"

"I said a joke." You luaghed too soon. Was that line a joke because Nanami Kento being comical? No. Impossible.

"I am sorry, baby. It's not true, right?"

"It is. You wanna see? Okay here we go." He moved his head back to harumi. "Harumi, do you know what do you call an alligator in a vest?" Your eyes were hooked on to them.

"An investigator." You couldn't believe your eyes nor your ears. She was really laughing. You chuckled too. Harumi must really loved his dad. Either that, or she has a poor sense of humor like the blonde in front of her.

Since then, Kento always collects dad jokes like pokemons and records her giggling.

𝐑𝐘𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐍 𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐔𝐍𝐀 .ೃ࿐

Trust me or not, Sukuna is a great father. I'll tell you why. You don't see his protectiveness? Yeah he doesn't show much care on the surface, but you don't spot how he is always lurking behind you to whoop anyone's ass who tries to hurt his loved ones?

That's how Sukuna is even as a father. He wants his kids to stand up for themselves, but he'd always be having their back. To hold them and catch them if they trip.

"Oh they sure do grow up fast. You blink and they're already in college, y/n," your neighbor laughed with you. It was Akio's fifth birthday party.

"Everything looks great, but... " she scanned around, "don't you think pink theme is too girly for a boy? Especially the flower tiara on Akio's head.

You were irritated. How dare she say that? Unfortunately for her, Sukuna heard it and quickly walked to you. He kneeled to place the sanrio stickers on Akio's cheeks.

"Yeah so?" Your husband questioned the woman. "Who said pink is for just girls? And even if it was, there wouldn't be anything wrong with Akio liking it." The silence followed made it clear she didn't expect the clapback.

"Plus the tiara makes him look the cutest. Maybe you should try one. It's on the counter. You can surely use..." he eyed her head to toe"...some glow up.

She immediately rushed out of the door with her son and not apparently the counter. You three burst out laughing.

"Ugly Bitch telling my son what he should like."

"KUNA!" you slapped his back for swearing in front of your child.

"What?! Hey, if Akio ever wanted to call her that, I will galdy let it slide. In fact, I'll support him."

He might act like an immature kid sometime, but you know you had kids with the right person when he makes sure his children are raised in healthy environment.

Taglist: @denji-star @simp-lauren @katsukichu @bbytamaki @thebrokenkitkat @his-saiko @loml-riri @milophiliac @aztecbrujeria @tohokuu @chailattle @erintaro @pumpumrins @lilitudemon @suyacho @keiskyutie @aiizenn @fluffy-ai @bibemiiu @4sat0ruu @namcore @yuujispinkhair @buerriberry @vagabond-umlaut @thedead101

[f1girliefics]

Their Reaction to You Being Pregnant - Preferences

A/N: Both planned and unplanned pregnancies below.

Daniel Ricciardo

It was a planned pregnancy and yet it hit you like a truck. You have been trying for so long, you almost gave up.

You planned a special dinner and even bought a special gift for him.

Little socks.

You gave it to him during dinner and watched as his face morphed into confusion.

"Isn't this too small for me to wear?"

"For you, perhaps, but not for our little one." you put him out of his misery as his smile grew bigger and bigger and tears fell from his eyes.

He would be so proud to finally become a dad.

Max Verstappen

Your pregnancy was unplanned but it was a nice surprise.

You had a stable relationship and you did talk about children before.

The way you told Max was not cute or romantic, you just basically blurred it out one day while watching TV.

"Come on Max! Your baby mama is craving some popcorn."

Oops.

He was shocked but then you spoke again. "I'm pregnant." to confirm what you just said.

Once he is able to close his mouth and talk, he will tell you that he is indeed happy.

"I just can't believe it!" he said.

"With the way you behaved for the entire summer break... I'm not shocked." you gave him a wink as he handed you the popcorn.

Fernando Alonso

He always wanted you.

Even if you were years younger. You didn't care about his age, you loved him.

It was a complicated love with many headlines.

Your pregnancy became one of the biggest, claiming you are a gold digger.

But Fernando didn't care for the headlines. He loved you and your baby.

Even if it was an unplanned baby, it was definitely not an unwelcome one.

"I would do anything for the two of you." he promised you the day you told him about your pregnancy.

Lance Stroll

You told him about your pregnancy on his birthday.

At first, he didn't believe you, but then he would be so thrilled he picked you up and spun you around for two minutes.

You had to tell him you would throw up if he didn't put you down.

Lewis Hamilton

You two would be trying to have a child for years when you finally get pregnant.

Both of you would be told by your doctor after weeks of hope due to your symptoms.

He would be so happy, he would shed many tears and he would be unable to stop hugging you.

On your way home, you would stop by to start and plan your baby's room.

George Russell

He would be in the middle of a meeting when you texted him. He could only check your messages after the meeting. George would drop his phone upon seeing the picture you sent.

5 pregnancy tests, all positive.

He would pick up his now broken phone and call you, rushing to his car to go home.

But you picked up the phone and you sounded so happy, it made all his worries lift off of his shoulders.

"We are having a baby George! I'm so happy!"

All his worries and doubts, out the window, the second he heard your laugh.

George will never forget that moment and how he cried of happiness at a red light.

Lando Norris

You two constantly joked about you getting pregnant.

When you started using pills instead of condoms, it was a constant joke between you two.

Lando did like to play with the idea of getting you pregnant.

But neither of you was serious until you took a test.

Positive.

"Okay, that is only a little plastic, the doctor needs to confirm." he would say and the next day you would be at the doctor's.

And the doctor did confirm, you were indeed 3 weeks into your first pregnancy.

You two sat in the car after the visit in silence.

Your mind was empty yet is was filled with thoughts.

"Let's grab something to eat before we go home." he would finally speak, making you look at him, you smiled when you saw the happiness in his eyes.

All your worries were gone because you knew you two can do this.

Oscar Piastri

To say that your pregnancy was a shock would be an understatement.

Both of you stared at the result for hours in silence.

Then, you finally spoke up. "Well, at least now we know I don't actually hate you."

He would laugh. He would laugh so hard that tears would fill his eyes.

You and your baby will be in good hands. Oscar would be the best father ever.

Carlos Sainz

You were on a vacation in Spain when you started to feel sick. You thought it would pass but Carlos insisted on visiting a doctor. This is when the news of your pregnancy hit you.

You didn't speak much Spanish, but that word, you understood.

Almost like a truck, it knocked all air out of your lungs.

When the doctor left, you turned to Carlos.

"Looks like we will have a little one running around soon." he spoke as he laughed but tears also left his eyes. "I'm so happy." he said, finally calming you down.

Charles Leclerc

After getting Leo, you didn't even talk about babies anymore. You were happy where you were in that moment.

But of course, the universe and a heated night had different ideas.

Your pregnancy was confirmed by the doctor and now you just needed to tell Charles.

You travelled to his upcoming race and had a plan.

But that plan all went out the window the moment he finished first.

Suddenly you completely forgot about everything and everyone as he hugged you close and you told him.

"Now our baby can say their father is number one!" you didn't even realise what you said.

"You're pregnant," he said and you nodded, crying from happiness. "PREGNANT!" he yelled as suddenly the trophy in his hand wasn't the most important thing.

[dancingbirdie]

Behold my labor of love: Astarion SMUT.

This idea came to me after writing my last fic Something Imagined / Something Real. I wanted to backtrack and reimagine Astarion and Tav's first night together after the tiefling party.

If smut is not your thing, no worries! You can scroll down to the first set of asterisks (***) to avoid reading those parts. You don't miss much at all plot-wise.

This is my first time ever writing smut. Please be kind. And I hope you enjoy!

EDIT: This is a flashback fic! Part 2 is Something Imagined / Something Real. And subsequent vignettes to come!

I Want It To Be You

Rating: Mature/NSFW

Pairing: Astarion x f!Tav

Word Count: 5.2K

Warnings: Detailed description of consensual sex, Tav's first time having sex, descriptions and references to Astarion's trauma/trauma responses, description of panic attack/anxiety, minor Act 1 and Act 2 spoilers, FLUFF, angst

“Are you absolutely certain about this? About… me?” 

If she weren’t already lying naked in his arms, she would have shed her clothes for him for that response alone. He wasn’t treating her like some oddity. And he was honoring her decision. It was more than anything Tav had dared hope for. 

Her eyes welled with tears that threatened to fall. She laughed, suddenly elated, before nodding her head vigorously. 

“I’m sure, Astarion,” she confirmed. “I want this to be with you.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

TWO WEEKS AGO

THE NIGHT OF THE TIEFLING PARTY

Let’s wait until things quiet down. Once the others are asleep, we’ll find each other. 

Astarion’s parting words replayed over and over again in her head as she padded quietly through the woods, away from the campsite. From the comfort and familiarity of the party. They hadn’t agreed on a meeting place, but Tav assumed his heightened senses would locate her soon enough. She was grateful for the extra moments to herself. Her stomach was knotted from nerves and anticipation for what the night might bring. 

She hadn’t told him that she was a virgin. He probably deserved to know, she realized that, but she hadn’t wanted him to change his mind just because he’d be taking something no one else had before. It was her choice, her body to give, she reasoned to herself. Whether for the first time or the hundredth time, it shouldn’t matter. Right?

Her past experiences certainly influenced her reticence. Divulging that particular information about herself had resulted in people immediately halting romantic pursuits with her, or leering at her like she was some sort of top-shelf prize they were about to take home. She didn’t want to know if, or where, Astarion might land on that spectrum. Didn’t think her heart could take either reaction from him. Besides, she’d read enough of those dirty romance tomes and scrolls throughout her life (for educational purposes, of course, she justified to herself) to have a general understanding of what happens during sex. Surely she could bluff her way through this. Right?

She wanted to please him. Wanted him to want her as much as she wanted him. It was no secret that Astarion had quickly become her favorite companion in this unlikely band of heroes she was traveling with. He was absolutely gorgeous, of course, but the longer she lingered around him, the less that seemed to matter. He was funny, in a devilish sort of way. Intelligent and cunning. Perceptive. And, while it was obvious that it unsettled the rest of the group, she genuinely appreciated how he prioritized his own self before bending over backwards to help someone else. Secretly, she wished she could emulate that a bit more in her own life, but years and years of people pleasing to win what scraps of affection she could was a hard habit to break. 

Clearly she was no closer to doing so, as there she stood. In the middle of a forest. Preparing for a midnight tryst with a person she had just met but grown to genuinely care for. And she wasn’t even sure that he would, or wanted to, return her sentiments. 

“There you are. I’ve been waiting.”

Astarion’s voice broke the mundane quiet of the forest that had lulled her into such ruminations. She turned toward the direction she had heard him speak and marveled at the sight of him slipping gracefully between the trees, moving ever slowly toward her. 

He had removed his shirt and was clad only in his leather breeches and boots. His alabaster skin practically glowed in the silvery light of the moon. He was the most beautiful person Tav thought she had ever laid eyes on, and it wasn’t only because she could now see the taut, sinewy muscles of his abdomen. He was perfectly fit in an elegant sort of way. Not like Halsin, with large bulging biceps, thick torso and sturdy legs. No, Astarion was like a leopard. Lithe, agile, regal even. And his face. Gods, the poets and painters could opine for centuries on his beautiful face without ever growing weary. 

“Is that so?” Tav called out in reply, walking to close the distance between them. By her estimate, she sounded much braver than she felt. Good. 

Astarion nodded, raising one hand to cup her cheek. “Waiting since the moment I set eyes on you. Waiting to have you,” he finished, the pad of his thumb grazing sensually across her lower lip. 

“You don’t have me yet,” she whispered teasingly, although both of them were clearly aware of how she had shivered when he touched her. How her head bowed into his touch, like a lovesick little thing. 

“Don’t I?” he smirked. “You’re here. And I don’t think you want to talk.” He stepped closer, completely absolving them both of any personal space. His free hand came to rest along the curve of her waist. 

“I think you want to be known. To be tasted.” He purred, lowering his head so that his lips ghosted the shell of her ear while he spoke.

Tav was thankful for the steadiness of his hands on her. His insinuations alone were quickly rendering her a quaking mess. But she didn’t want to be a selfish lover, and so she collected herself enough to pose a question in return.

“What do you want, Astarion?” she asked, bringing a hand to rest softly against his chest, over his heart.

She noted the way his brows drew down briefly, seeming almost confused by her question. But as quick as it came, the expression vanished, replaced by something much more confident. More assertive.

“What do any of us want?” he breathed. “Pleasure. Yours. Mine. Our collective ecstasy.”

Gently, so very gently, he began to trail hot, open-mouth kisses down the column of her neck. Tav’s breath caught audibly in her throat, and Astarion hummed in approval at her response.

“That’s what you want, isn’t it?,” he murmured into the crook of her neck. “To lose yourself in me?”

It was fast becoming difficult for her to string two thoughts together. Astarion touching her like this sent shockwaves throughout her body. That curious heat she’d only known from touching herself began to kindle low in her belly. She clenched her thighs together subconsciously, trying to sate that feeling the fire was stirring up inside her. Astarion noticed her squirming, to his immense satisfaction.

“Well?” he coaxed in between kisses across her collarbone. His prompting reminded Tav that she had yet to answer his question, so lost was she in the feeling of his cool lips against her rapidly warming skin.

“I want to be with you. Share this night with you,” she answered honestly, unable to spare enough brain capacity to consider whether or not it was a good idea to be so forthcoming. 

“Such a charitable little thing,” he chuckled. “How could I deny you?”

And then his mouth captured hers. It was a searing, passionate kiss. A kiss that promised so much more pleasure to come. One that Tav had never known before, despite having partaken in her fair share of kisses over the years. But this kiss? This was the kiss of time-fated lovers. And Tav was desperate to match Astarion’s pace, desperate to feel more, more, more.

She moaned as he ran his tongue lightly against the seam of her lips, granting him entry to fully sweep in and plunder her mouth proper. Her fingers carded through his silvery blonde curls, nails scraping lightly against his scalp. He groaned in response, the sound vibrating in her mouth. 

She finally was forced to break their kiss after a few moments, hungrily gulping in air to alleviate her starving lungs. Astarion moved to ravage her neck once more, licking and sucking the soft delicate skin there. He gripped her ass possessively as he did so, walking her backwards until he was pressing her into the nearest tree.  

He lifted a knee to knock her legs apart before raising it higher to press into the juncture of her thighs. He delighted at how Tav immediately parted her legs for him, how she moaned from the pressure, how she subconsciously began grinding against him. 

“Look at you, you naughty thing” he crooned in her ear. “Riding my leg for some relief?”

Primal behavior called out, a scarlet blush immediately bloomed on Tav’s neck and cheeks. It only goaded Astarion further. 

“Go on then, darling. Rut against me. But I’m getting these lovely tits free first,” he whispered.  

He began undoing the laces on the front of her corset. Tav watched his progress, entranced by the gracefulness of his long, slender fingers. She was nearly trembling with anticipation. Once finished, she helped him extract her from the offending garment and allowed him to lift her chemise up, over her head, so that she was fully bare from the waist up. The cool night air turned her skin to gooseflesh, her nipples hardening.  

The sensation roused her lust-addled brain enough to realize just how vulnerable she was, standing there half-naked before him. She’d never been so exposed to another person before. Her fingers fluttered as she fought the sudden bout of nerves that insisted she cover her breasts from view. 

“Don’t you dare,” Astarion growled, plainly reading the self-conscious expression on her face. “I’ve been dying to see these for days now,” he continued, cupping one full breast and flicking her nipple lightly with his thumb. 

It sent a pulse thrumming directly to her core, and Tav moaned openly at the sensation. She could feel her simple linen breeches were completely drenched, was certain she was also dampening Astarion’s leg as she continued to grind against him.

Astarion chuckled, clearly pleased by her reaction. 

“So responsive,” he whispered before lowering his mouth to latch onto her breast. He sucked lightly, while his hand continued its assault on the other. She fisted his hair in one hand, kissing the top of his head lovingly while he worked her into a frenzy.

Tav felt like she was quickly losing any ability to maintain balance. Her body was aching, whining, for more. She wanted to be laid out on the ground, wanted him to press her into the soft earth, taking everything. 

“Astarion, please,” she panted, pulling at his curls. He groaned in response, releasing her nipple from his mouth. 

“Please what, pet?” he teased, kissing and licking up her sternum. 

“I need… more,” she whined, bucking against his leg. 

He huffed a laugh before sweeping her up in one smooth motion and lowering her to the soft grass beneath their feet. 

He began to loosen the fastenings of her breeches with a practiced ease. Tav watched, breathless, as he slid the fabric down her thighs, his mouth following with indolent, open-mouthed kisses. Each touch of his lips on her heated skin left her skin tingling, her hips canting slightly into the open air.

Finally bare before him, she watched as Astarion surveyed her from where she lay beneath him. In nearly all respects, he looked primed and ready to ravage her. His nostrils flared, detecting the heady scent of her arousal. His chest rose and fell with shallow, ragged breaths. For the first time, she took note of the considerable erection straining against the leathers he still wore. 

After a moment, he came down to lie beside her, pulling her onto her side so that her chest was pressed flush against his. He trailed a hand down her side, over the rise and fall of her curves, until he reached her thigh. He hiked her leg onto his hip.

But something was off. Amid her clouded thoughts, Tav thought she could sense it, even if she couldn’t precisely put a finger on it. Perhaps it was the look in his eyes? Or the perfect nature of his behavior? He seemed almost too practiced, too formulaic. Like an actor who’s rehearsed their lines to the point that the words have lost their meaning. He was there with her, but somehow he wasn’t, at the same time. 

“Are you all right?” Tav asked in a hushed voice, lifting a hand to cup his neck. She rubbed soothing circles with her thumb across his jawline.

“I’m more than all right, darling,” he replied with a smirk, squeezing her ass lightly.

 “You seem like… you’re not wholly present,” she explained.

“It’s difficult to decide what I’d like to do to you first,” he reasoned, sidestepping her unspoken question. “I’m torn between tasting you with my tongue, or fucking you with my fingers,” he smirked. 

Before she could respond, his fingers took an experimental swipe between her folds. She gasped at the feeling, her hips bucking against him. She watched, speechless, as he lifted that hand to suck the wetness from his fingers. Her wetness. In his mouth. 

He groaned in approval. “Mmm. You’re pure sweetness, darling.” 

All thoughts eddied from her mind. A singular, primal focus took over, and she suddenly clutched at Astarion’s neck with newfound ferocity. 

He seemed to know exactly how his behavior had affected her, if his impish grin was anything to go by. He lowered his hand to swipe against her once again, his fingers stopping to circle that sensitive bud at the apex of her thighs. Tav jerked in response, but Astarion had been prepared for it. He used his other arm to brace against her back, locking her in place against him. 

As she writhed against his hand, he repositioned himself to insert a finger inside her. She was deliciously warm and soaking wet. Soft, like velvet. His thumb continued to circle her clit, eliciting a long, low moan from Tav. Embarrassed, she attempted to muffle her voice by ducking her face into his chest. 

He chuckled again. “That’s it, sweet one. Let me hear you,” he goaded her. Her moans pitched higher in response. 

After a few moments of pistoning in and out of her, he inserted a second finger. But despite how drenched she was, he met considerable resistance, to his surprise. He stilled his fingers in response, uncertain. 

It took a moment for Tav to register that Astarion had stopped moving inside her. Caught somewhere between discomfort and satisfaction, the increased sense of fullness his two fingers brought was strange but not altogether unwelcome. She exhaled, but it came out as more of a hiss than a sigh. After a moment of stillness, she raised her head to look at him.

“What is it?” she questioned..

“You’ve never done this before, have you?” Astarion murmured. 

Tav flushed. He’d realized, despite her best efforts to cover up that truth. Absently, she wondered what had given her away. 

She said nothing at first, just studied him. He didn’t seem angry. But then again, she had quickly learned that Astarion was very skilled at masking his true feelings. 

“No. I haven’t,” she admitted.  

At her reply, he gently removed his fingers from inside her. He moved his hand to clutch her hip instead. 

She sighed, rolling onto her back, gazing up at the stars. “Is that going to be a problem for you?” 

Silence. It felt deafening in her ears. But then –  

“I’m a bad choice, darling,” he replied, his thumb rubbing absentmindedly over her hip bone. She failed to see the sad smile that graced his mouth. “A terrible choice, really. For your first time.”

“It’s my decision,” she retorted, lolling her head to the side so she could look him straight in the eyes. “I want it to be you, Astarion. But if this is going to be a… problem for you, or become some ordeal where you feel guilty or weirdly triumphant, then we can just–” 

“It’s not a problem for me. It’s your decision,” he affirmed softly, interrupting the beginning of her tirade. Some unknown emotion flitted across his features. He schooled his expression before she could really identify it.

“But I have to ask,” he continued, studying her seriously. “Are you absolutely certain about this? About… me?” 

If she weren’t already lying naked in his arms, she would have shed her clothes for him for that response alone. He wasn’t treating her like some oddity. And he was honoring her decision. It was more than anything Tav had dared hope for. 

Her eyes welled with tears that threatened to fall. She laughed, suddenly elated, before nodding her head vigorously. 

“I’m sure, Astarion,” she confirmed. “I want this to be with you.”

His eyes softened, obviously touched by her response. It was the first time tonight, she realized, that he had appeared vulnerable to her. He was staring at her as though he were seeing her for the first time. Like he couldn’t believe that the woman between his arms was real. 

Without another word, he captured her mouth in a passionate kiss. His tongue swept in her mouth at the same time he inserted his fingers again, tasting her gasp of pleasure. His thumb began circling her clit once more, and Tav was powerless to silence her moans.

“Good. So good, sweet girl,” he whispered in her ear after a few moments. “You’re so close.”

She let loose a whine, squeezing her eyes shut as she chased that ever-nearing precipice inside her. Astarion’s voice in her ear only pushed her that much closer.

“That’s it. Come for me,” he urged, and she felt her orgasm rip through her at his words. Stars collided behind her eyes as she tumbled from that cliff of pleasure, Astarion holding her and whispering soft praises as she floated back down to earth. 

Eventually her eyes fluttered open to see Astarion smiling openly at her. She felt her lips stretch up to return his grin.  

“That was… incredible,” she breathed. 

He huffed a soft laugh. “I’m not nearly finished with you. Unless you’d like to sto–”

“No,” Tav blurted, a little too loudly, interrupting him. “No. I want more. Please. Show me.”

“Of course, darling” Astarion promised, planting a soft kiss on her forehead. He gently released her and stood, beginning to remove his own clothing. Tav watched him brazenly, drinking in the sight of him. 

She moaned softly as he removed his breeches, his impressive length springing free. He remained still, allowing her to take in the sight of him fully naked before her. Curious, she sat up and lifted a hand to wrap around him. She marveled at the way he felt. Like velvet-wrapped steel. She gave a tentative stroke, thrilling as he groaned in response. She stroked him again, harder, intent on learning how to give him as much pleasure as he’d already given her. 

But he stayed her wrist with a gentle touch of his hand. She paused, looking up at him, confused. 

“As exquisite as teaching you how to stroke me would be,” he explained in a sultry voice, “I’m much more interested in teaching you something else tonight.”

Tav nodded mutely, lying back once more. She opened her legs for him to return to her. Astarion smiled, lowering himself on top of her. He braced his forearms on either side of her head, one hand absently combing through her hair. His hips fit perfectly in the cradle of her thighs, and she moaned as she felt him gently nudge against her entrance. 

“This is going to hurt at first,” he explained in a hushed whisper. She nodded, her breathing a bit uneven in anticipation of what would come next. 

“But then it will stop. You’ll stretch around me. And then it will feel good,” he continued. 

She nodded again, trying to remain focused on his words. But the primal part of her mind was warring against her. And it was winning. She subconsciously bucked her hips into him, marveling as she felt him slip between her folds just slightly. He hissed at the sensation, clenching his jaw.  

“Greedy little thing,” he chastised teasingly. “All right, enough talking. But you will tell me if you need to stop, yes?” 

“Yes,” she breathed. “Yes, I promise.”

“Good girl,” he purred.

And then slowly, gently, he sheathed himself fully inside her with a groan. 

Tav gasped in response. It was unlike any feeling she had ever felt before. Astarion had been right; it was painful at first. A pinching sensation. A mind-bending feeling of fullness. But then, but then, the feeling was phenomenal. She felt her walls stretch to accommodate him, felt herself clench around him, accepting him in his entirety. 

Astarion’s head dropped to the crook of her neck. His whole body trembled, as if it was taking all his restraint to remain still so she could grow accustomed to him. 

She canted her hips into him a bit, testing the waters. He groaned again in response, and she released a breathy chuckle. 

He raised his head at the sound, peering down at her. “You little minx,” he breathed. “You have no idea what you’ve started.”

She thrilled at his words, crying out in ecstasy as he began to thrust in and out of her. The pace he set was addicting; the rhythm had her pushing her hips up to meet him, her legs locked around his back to pull him closer.

“You’re taking me so, so well, darling,” Astarion grunted, ratcheting up his pace. “You’re so tight. So. Perfectly. Fucking. Tight.” 

His words were a fuel to her flame. She cried out his name again and again as he continued to rut into her, reveling in the feeling of him claiming her completely and totally. She was lost to the sensations, adrift in the fullness of Astarion inside her. 

Finally, or perhaps all too soon, she felt his pace begin to grow more erratic. His hips lost their rhythmic pumping. His groans grew louder. Sensing his release was close, Tav clutched him tighter, digging her heels in his back to pull him closer, clenching around his length inside her. 

“Yes, yes, FUCK,” he barked all at once, and her eyes rolled back into her head as he slammed himself to the hilt inside of her one final time. She could feel his release spilling inside her. 

Lost for words, she simply held Astarion as he half-collapsed on top of her, one arm still braced on the ground beside her head. Listless, euphoric, and utterly at peace, Tav raised one arm to gently caress his back, listening to his erratic breaths slow. Distantly, she noted the raised, rough sensation of scars on his upper back, but she was too consumed by their mutual pleasure to give it a further thought. 

Eventually, Astarion slipped out of her. He lowered himself to lie down beside her, curling one arm around her waist. 

Tav closed her eyes and curled into his side, suddenly overcome with drowsiness. “Thank you, Astarion” she whispered faintly. 

“For what, my darling?” he crooned, tucking an errant curl behind her ear. 

“For making my first time so wonderful,” she replied. 

She was asleep before he could think of a sufficient response. 

***

The panic was a monstrous thing. Clawing at his chest, its vice-like grip squeezing his lungs until inhaling felt like breathing through a reed. He could barely think. Barely move. Barely registered the lovely woman still sleeping peacefully beside him. 

The part of his brain that wasn’t frozen in fear chastised himself for behaving this way. He had taken plenty of virgins before. In fact, he had sought them out specifically. They were a much easier prey. They became attached to him so quickly, attributed so much more meaning to their first bout of lovemaking than perhaps more… seasoned individuals. 

He should have been elated. She was obviously besotted with him. His plan to ensure her loyalty was moving forward without a hitch. So then why was he feeling so horrible?

He turned to observe Tav. So close to him and yet so far away. Swept into that blissful sleep that continued to elude him. He watched her chest rise and fall with deep, steady breaths. Watched her eyelids twitch as her mind made its way through some dream. She was so very vulnerable in this position. And so very trusting. Of him, of all people. 

Astarion didn’t like many people. But he had developed a fondness for Tav, despite the short period of time they had known one another. She treated him like a person, not a monster. Not like the others in their party. She seemed to accept him for who he was, cynicism and vanity and all. He couldn’t remember ever knowing someone as kind to him as she was. She was… incredible.

And then it struck him. He was developing… something… for her. Feelings? Affection? The sentiments were so foreign to him, he didn’t even know what to call it. 

But the realization caused panic to clutch him even tighter. No. He couldn’t feel this way. He wouldn’t. 

This thing with Tav was purely transactional. It had to be. There was no other viable option. She had needed to feel something with someone. He had needed to secure an ally. That was all.

That is all this is, he thought, quashing the weak sentimental part of his mind. 

And come morning, he resolved he would make certain that that was all this was for her as well.  

***

Tav woke to the sound of birds chirping, high in the trees above her. The early morning sunlight filtered in through the forest, dappling her skin and warming her in the places that it touched. Opening her eyes, she spied Astarion, already dressed and standing a few paces in front of her. 

His back was facing her, his face lifted toward the sun. She noted how he held his arms outstretched by his sides, palms facing up as though he were trying to collect all the sunlight pouring into their little grove. Despite his preternatural sense of hearing, he didn’t seem to be aware that she’d awoken, so lost was he in his enjoyment of the sun’s rays. 

Tav’s heart nearly swelled to bursting as she watched him. Before all of this, he hadn’t felt the sunlight on his skin in over 200 years. Now, he was reveling in it. His joy was such an innocent, pure thing. 

How many times had Tav taken the sun warming her skin for granted? Probably all of her life, she supposed. To see someone so appreciative of something so utterly mundane to her… well, it was a sobering reminder to acknowledge those little pleasures in life, especially the ones that seemed so constant to her. 

She also took the time to study the strange pattern of scars on his back. She had felt some of the rough ridges last night, as she clutched him closer while he spilled himself inside her. But she hadn’t realized just how intricate and intentional the markings were. The sight of them sparked a rage inside her. Whoever the monster was who’d done this to him, they deserved to pay a price worse than death. 

Someday soon, she swore she would ask him about those markings. But not today. Not right now. Not in the aftermath of spending such a wonderful night together. No, the only thing she wanted for them both today was to revel in post-coital bliss. 

Not wishing to startle him, Tav intentionally laid back to stretch out her blissfully sore muscles, rustling the grass and fallen leaves around her. She threw in a halfhearted yawn for good measure. Secretly, she hoped he would return to her, take her again in this quiet forest, beneath the warmth of the sun.

“You sleep light,” Astarion chuckled, half-turning to speak to her but not meeting her gaze. “I thought you’d be exhausted after last night.” 

Tav hesitated at his tone. It wasn’t cold per se, but he sounded much more guarded than he had been last night. Perhaps she was just being extra sensitive in light of what they had shared, she reasoned.

“Did you enjoy it?” she asked hesitantly. She watched his back, waiting for a reply. “It felt like… you weren’t truly there…” she added, after a beat of silence. 

“I was… holding back a little, it’s true,” he finally responded. “I didn’t want to lose control. Delicious as you were… I didn’t want to go too far.”

“Oh, I see,” Tav replied, a bit dismayed. “I’m sorry you felt that way.”

Astarion turned and gave her a trademark smirk. “Think nothing of it, darling. Now,” he intoned, clapping his hands together. “Shall we get on? We’ve wasted enough time already.”

The words were like a lance to her heart. 

“I… I didn’t consider it a waste,” she murmured, trying with some difficulty to hide her hurt. 

“I didn’t mean it that way,” Astarion huffed. “I just meant I’d like to break camp and get out of here before those tieflings drag us into another one of their messes.”

“Sure, of course,” Tav nodded, smiling up at him, though it came across as more of a grimace. Then she broke eye contact, bending over under the guise of collecting her discarded clothing. Really, she didn’t think she could look at him a moment longer without crying. 

“I still need to dress,” she said, attempting a casual sort of air. “You go ahead without me.”

She sensed rather than saw Astarion hesitate at her suggestion. 

“Are you sure? We’re a fair walk from camp. I can spare a few moments and wait.”

“Positive,” she replied with false cheer. “Go on ahead. The last thing either of us need is the party jeering at us if we’d return together.” 

“Fair point,” Astarion conceded. “All right. Then… I’ll see you, back at camp.” Then he was walking away, back toward the direction of their fellow party members.

Tav waited until she could no longer hear his footsteps before she let loose a quiet sob. She wasn’t exactly sure why she was crying. Maybe it was just the stress of everything that had finally overwhelmed her. Maybe it was how abysmally this morning had gone. She didn’t know how she’d expected the morning after a sexual tryst to go, but she certainly hadn’t imagined what had just taken place. She hadn’t expected Astarion to slip that aloof mask he wore so well immediately back on, not when it was still just the two of them here. 

Then again, she reasoned, perhaps there was a perfectly justifiable reason for his actions. They barely knew one another, after all. He didn’t owe her anything beyond general respect. They hadn’t made any promises or ties to one another. They had simply agreed on a night of pleasure. That night had passed on. She should move on as well. Right?

But she had hoped. Oh, she had hoped. That maybe last night could have been the start of something new for her. For both of them. She knew she was a dreamer at heart. But still, part of her couldn’t help but hope that some silver lining would come out of all of this mess. 

In any case, she knew she needed to pull herself together before reentering the camp. She would not let anyone see her cry, especially Astarion. So she remained standing in the grove for a few moments longer, collecting herself. 

She forced her mind to focus on anything, anything else. She counted the birds she saw flitting amongst the tree limbs. She watched leaves swirling in their light, airy dance toward the ground. And she said a silent prayer to whatever gods were out there and possibly listening. She prayed that everything would work out the way it was meant to be.

[inuyashaluver]

can you please do one where less and reader is dating but some rumour came out ( like reader is cheating) or something because reader is seen with someone else quite a lot and they just have a argument but it turns out that reader is just planning to propose to less? Ur fics are the BESTTT

i can’t believe you - alessia russo

alessia russo x reader

description: in which your special surprise for your girlfriend gets spoilt by cheating rumours

warnings: angsty, mentions of cheating, multiple tears shed, miscommunication but happy happy ending

a/n: ahhh! this was so 🤍, thank you so much for the love, baby!!, i hope you enjoyyy ❤️ no joke, i teared up while writing this because i felt bad

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

you and your girlfriend, alessia knew each other better than you knew yourselves. you knew each other majority of your lives when you played for the same youth clubs.

you followed each other everywhere. whatever alessia did, you did, whatever you did, alessia did. it was simple.

you were two peas in a pod and that’s how you liked it, after your years of friendship, you both began dating when you studied in north carolina. she loved to tease you that you only made a move because she wore the captain’s armband, you would not confirm nor deny.

—

when you both came back from college and signed with manchester united, people saw the true alessia and (y/n) that were obsessed with each other.

it was a random day when you both went to training, hand in hand with cheesy smiles as you enter the change room that had numerous groans of teasing echoing in the room.

you both find it really hard to be apart from each other but alessia genuinely thought the world would end if you weren’t holding her hand. your cubbies are directly next to each other but she drags you to squeeze in hers.

if you get up to move, she’ll pout at you until you kiss her to make her feel better. you know her little tricks but you’re not complaining.

you stand up from her cubby after lacing your boots, squeezing her thigh before you get up, “where are you going?” she protests immediately, rushing to grab your hand to stop your movements.

“to the bathroom, baby, i’ll be two seconds” you giggle affectionately, kissing the crown of her head before making your way to the bathroom. her eyes watch you intently as you walk out of the room before ella plops down next to her and puts her in a choke hold.

“can’t survive without your little girlfriend, huh, less?” she teases, alessia grumbles and pushes her off, “fuck off, yes i can” she scoffs with a roll of her eyes. ella’s smirk turns into bright laughter when alessia’s face visibly brightens when you come back.

alessia glares at her until you come to stand in between her legs. she immediately wraps her arms around the back of your thighs while her head rests on her stomach. you smile as she leans into you as you play with the ends of her ponytail.

“why is my girlfriend pissed, tooney wooney?” you tease, giggling when alessia pulls you closer, almost making you fall on top of her.

“i just said she couldn’t live without you” she shrugs, alessia rests her chin on your stomach to look up at you. “baby, tell her i can!” she pouts, you smile amusingly at her and nod with a coo, “you can, lessi” she smiles satisfied and buries her face into your jersey, missing how you winked at ella.

you don’t blame your girlfriend though, you’re always together, it was the normal for both of you. ella masks her laugh and winks back at you before moving off so you could sit in your regular spot next to your girlfriend.

she immediately kicks her legs into your lap, you pull her closer while you smile sweetly at her. she puckers her lips at you and you close the gap without any second thought, kissing her gently a couple of times before pulling away and hyping her up for training.

“come on, star girl, training!” you tap her legs and she groans, shaking her head. “no, babe” she challenges, you smile at her, “hm, yes, babe” you tease her with a grin. she narrows her eyes at you for a second and rolls them when you cock your head at her.

“fine” she huffs, placing two hands on your hips to pull you into another kiss, one of her hands moves to the back of your head to deepen it and you have to push her away with quite a lot of strength to separate. “lessi” you warn, she squeezes your hips in response, you lean closer to her so her lips ghost yours, “training” you whisper, pecking them quickly and leaving her a flustered mess.

you pair up for training and giggle with each other, your bright smiles contagious for everyone on the team.

—

when you and alessia moved to arsenal, things couldn’t have been better. you both fit in like you’d been there all along. you and alessia moved to a new house and everything was just perfect. you two were extremely happy, so happy that you had a special plan up your sleeve.

it was extremely hard to keep it a secret but you were finally ready to propose to alessia. you’d bought the ring years ago, literally when you came back from college but the times didn’t feel right.

but everything recently had just been falling into place, you just needed the perfect plan, and who else would you employ other than leah williamson to help you out?

you and alessia were extremely close with leah, having known each other for years. you wanted to ask lotte but you and her collectively agreed that alessia would catch on quickly.

and so you started the planning with leah.

—

“baby, i’m just going to leah’s to help her with something around the house” you rush out after you both get home from training. she looks up at you confusingly as she sits on the couch, you always cuddle and watch something when you got home.

“what does she need help with?” alessia questions, watching you scramble to get things together. “just a flat pack or something, baby” you say randomly, her eyebrows furrow but she chooses not to question it. “oh okay” she says quite sadly and you feel bad, instantly.

“i’ll be back soon, love, i’ll get takeout for dinner and we can cuddle when i get back” you suggest, smiling when your girlfriend’s expression softens. “okay” she smiles, nodding at you, you lean down from the back of the couch and kiss her gently, pulling away with multiple pecks to her cheek making her giggle and squirm.

“i love you” you whisper in her ear, “i love you too” she whispers back, you grin at her again and kiss her quickly once more before rushing out the door.

—

over the span of two weeks, alessia was left at home for most of them. she trusted you with every bone in her body but things were popping up in the media that she couldn't help but look at them. pictures were popping up of you and leah in town, shopping, hanging out and people were questioning your loyalty.

alessia knew you wouldn’t cheat on her, she knew how much you love her but she’s only human, maybe the photos didn’t look friendly, you were hanging out with leah a lot, you were leaving her at home to be with leah. thoughts were lingering and she couldn’t help it.

—

the reality was that you and leah were perfecting the little details for your proposal. the plan was simple: you would take out alessia to dinner at her favourite restaurant, getting her flowers and chocolate.

after that, you would take her to the beach where you have an elaborate set up waiting for her. a large heart made out of rose petals with candles lighting up the sand. a photographer would be hiding and you would propose.

then, you’d take her back home, all your nearest and dearests waiting for the two of you. photos would be plastered of the two of you all over the place, it was alessia dream proposal, you knew she would love it.

—

you’d come back one night after being at leah’s all day basically, you were proposing tomorrow. alessia went to get dinner with lotte, which ended up being cut short by the blonde crying in lotte’s arms asking why you didn’t want her anymore. (you didn’t know this)

“baby?” you sing out excitedly, your eyebrows furrow at the human golden retriever not bounding over to you like she always does. you rush and get your jacket and shoes off, moving closer into the house to try and find your special girl.

it was when you entered the dimly lit living room that you heard the soft sniffles coming from a bundle of blankets that you felt your heart shatter into pieces.

“lessi?” you ask softly, moving the blanket off her to see her tear stained cheeks and red nose.

she cries more when she sees you, “don’t, ‘lessi’ me, i can’t believe you” she cries, harshly wiping the tears off her cheeks. you sit down next to her instantly, “hey, what’s wrong?” you place a hand on her thigh and she tenses, you pull back instantly with a pained expression.

“you” she sobs, her body is wracking with tears and you don’t know what to do. “baby, what did i do? talk to me” you plead, your own eyes are filling with tears at seeing alessia sob, in all your years of dating, she’s never cried this hard.

“you don’t want me anymore” she chokes out, “you want leah” the tears are falling at a frantic rate and she’s rubbing them so harshly with the sleeves of her (your) hoodie.

“what?” you exclaim loudly, “what are you talking about?” you grab both of her hands and wipe her tears off her cheeks, much more gently than she was previously doing.

“you’re never home! if you don’t want to be with me anymore fucking break up with me, say it to my face!” she sobs, you pull her to your chest and she thumps her fist on it.

“i don’t want to break up with you, alessia, please-” you start but she hits you again, it’s not enough to hurt you physically but it’s doing wonders emotionally. each one felt like a stab to the chest.

“why are you always with leah, why don’t you want me anymore?” she cries, leaning into you slightly as you hold her to you tightly. “fuck, alessia, no, baby, me and leah are just planning something, please, it means nothing” you assure, she shakes her head. another hit.

“but it does mean something, you’re not here, i’m alone every night, my fucking phone is blowing up and it’s driving me insane.” her tears are soaking your shirt but you don’t care.

“alessia, look at me” you say sternly, she swallows the lump in her throat and looks up at you through her wet lashes, she sniffles when you make eye contact.

“alessia, i love you, i love you more than anyone in this world, leah is a friend, our friend and that’s all she is. you’re my person, i love you” you choke out, tears were falling down your own cheeks now and alessia instinctively wiped them.

“you know what? fuck it!” you get out of the embrace and sprint to your bedroom, throwing it apart to get the ring you’ve been hiding for years. you stumble as you run back to her on the couch and look at her breathlessly, ring in hand behind your back.

“leah has been helping me in planning something very special for you” she sniffs as she looks at you, listening to you intently.

“i had this big, fucking, elaborate plan but it’ll have to wait for tomorrow, i don’t care, i’m doing this now” you quickly wipe a tear before getting down on one knee. alessia gasps loudly and covers her mouth with her hands, she’s sobbing all over again.

“alessia mia teresa russo” you choke out, taking a deep breath before taking the ring out from behind your back, alessia’s eyes widen when she sees the ring, sobbing uncontrollably.

“my pretty girl, my favourite person in the whole world. the first time i met you when we were 10, i told my family that i was going to marry you and i kept my promise” you swallow, she looks at you trying your best keep her composure, each word clinging to her ear as you spoke.

“my alessia, you’re kind, smart, beautiful and the sweetest person alive and that’s only some of the things i love about you.” you take a deep breath, tears were falling fast and hard for both of you.

“i love the way you can’t sleep without me scratching your back, the way your nose crinkles when you laugh, the way you drag me along to all your nail appointments to make me get matching nails with you”

you both let out a wet laugh, alessia looks at you with sweetest expression, her eyes were filled with love, but nothing compared to the way you were looking at her right now, she takes a mental photograph of it to replay it forever.

“you’re my best friend, my person, i couldn’t imagine a life without you, and so, i’m asking you to be my best friend forever, will you marry me?” you ask nervously, alessia lets out a sob and nods, pulling you into a bone crushing hug while kneeling on the floor with you. her face buries itself in your neck as you both cry, clutching onto each other for dear life.

“i love you, i love you so much” you coos, running a hand through her hair while her arms grip you tightly. “i love you” she breathes out, moving back to look at you. “my future wife” you breathe out in slight disbelief, her heart jolts. “my future wife” she parrots under her breath, her eyes tracing all over your face before you pull her into a passionate kiss.

it’s frantic and needy but soft and loving all at the same time. you’re moving completely in sync and she hums against you in relief. she pulls away to rest her forehead on yours, “i’m so sorry for everything” she sniffs, choking back her tears as you look at each other. “don’t be sorry, baby, it’s okay” you coo, moving a stray piece of hair from her forehead.

“fucking media bullshit” she grits out, you laugh affectionately and peck her lips a couple times, she smiles into you, “fucking media bullshit” you say in agreement, looking at her with a cheeky smile.

“can i put the ring on you, beautiful?” you grin as she nods instantly, “yes please” you take it out from the box and slip it in her finger, a complete, utter perfect fit. her breath hitches when she sees it on her finger, looking up at you then back at the ring and back at you again.

she surges forward to kiss you again, “i love you” she mumbles against your lips, you smile into her, “i love you too” you grin, kissing her deeply as you pull her to sit on the couch. after a whole lot of kissing and talking, you and alessia cuddle, she lays on top of your chest as you run your hands on her back under her hoodie.

“can we still do the proposal you planned?” alessia looks up at you from your chest, “but you have the ring already, baby” you chuckle, pinching her cheek affectionately.

“but you worked so hard on it, i feel awful” she admits, pressing a gentle kiss to your sternum. “i’ll still do what i planned and you can wear the ring, lessi” you smile, “you don’t need to feel bad at all, i can’t even imagine how you felt, i'm sorry i wasn't there for you” you look sad and alessia scrambles to straddle your waist.

“no, we’re not going to be sad, we’re forgetting all of this and being happy alessia and (y/n) who are now engaged” she says sternly, you smile up at her affectionately while running your hands over her thighs. “okay, baby” you coo, smiling when she leans down to kiss you.

—

you do your original proposal as planned and alessia and you share tears at every location. it was so special for the two of you and you were so appreciative of each other. ‘in love’ was an understatement.

when you get back to your house to all your guests, alessia looks at you like you hung all the stars in the sky. you do an emotional speech about alessia before thanking everyone for coming, she cries again when you never take your eyes off her as you spoke about her so affectionately.

you do your rounds together gaining congratulations and as soon as she sees leah she sprints to her. she pulls her in a tight hug and apologises profusely, leah’s eyebrows knit together in worry and confusion as she hugs your now fiancé, looking at you for any answer and you wink in response.

alessia then grabs your hand, dragging you off to look at all the photos around the room, smiling and laughing at old memories.

so no, your proposal didn’t happen the exact way you wanted but you got your girl in the end. it was definitely a story for the books. you love each other dearly and it shows.

⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆

liked by leahwilliamsonn and 44,232 others

alessiarusso99: my best friend, cheers to forever 🥂🍾 i love you x

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yourname: my beautiful girl, i love you so much

↳ alessiarusso99: i love you, baby

leahwilliamsonn: my babies are all grown up

↳ alessiarusso99: i’m so sorry, i love you

↳ leahwilliamsonn: why do you keep saying sorry

↳ yourname: long story

ellatoone: told you! i knew you couldn’t live without her, cheers to my sisters 🥂

↳ yourname: tooney wooney!! sister forever 🥂

↳ alessiarusso99: i won’t even lie, it’s true

↳ ellatoone: sappppppp

[bakuliwrites]

Ebb and Flow- Prince Sidon x Reader

Rating: 18+ (MINORS DNI)

Fandom: The Legend of Zelda

Relationship: Prince Sidon x Reader

Summary: “I will not accept that all we’re meant to be are star-crossed lovers,” Sidon states passionately, his tone filled with a steady resolve, “I cannot accept it. Was it not here that I pledged myself to you? And you to me? Was it not here that we promised our hearts to one another? Aren’t we more than just crossing tides?”Sidon is given earth shattering news. His duty as a Zora Prince outweighs all else. But how can he accept that when his love for you is so deep?

Tags: Female Reader, Smut, Angst, PIV, Semi-Public S*x, Outdoor S*x, Oral S*x, Shark Anatomy, Established Relationship, Star-crossed Lovers, Romance

Read here in this post or over on my AO3

DISCLAIMER: TOTK SPOILERS, 18+

Sidon wonders if he had spoken too softly. He expected some sort of reaction from you, even if it wasn’t a dramatic, soul-wrenching one. But your silence comes as a shock to him. Your unreadable gaze penetrates him from where you’re seated by the window in your quarters. Quarters he had specifically modified to house a Hylian such as yourself. Just for you. Fashioned to house you for what he thought would be forever. From the luxurious water bed on one side, where the two of you have shared so many passionate nights, to the cozy, crackling fireplace on the other- it’s all been for you, and him, and what he thought would be your future together.

“Y-you what?” you finally manage, confirming to Sidon that it wasn’t that you didn’t hear him, but that you couldn’t believe what he’d said. He hadn't wanted to tell you until he returned from his diplomatic mission, but he couldn't keep it a secret from you. Sidon's words stick to his throat. They feel barbed, razor-like, cutting his tongue on their way out.

“My father has decided- He’s arranged my marriage,” Sidon repeats, words seeping from his mouth like blood. But he tastes nothing when his tongue grazes over his lower lip, checking for a fresh wound. Still, he tastes metal, haunting and sharp. You’re bathed in moonlight, a silver gloss draping elegantly over your skin. Tonight, you appear to Sidon like an ethereal ghost, distant and untouchable, a curiously beautiful and captivating goddess. Like the moon delivered you to him and has come back this night to steal you away. 

“Not only has my father found who he considers to be a ‘suitable match’ for me, but he’s arranged the date of our meeting,” Sidon goes on, wanting to fill this deeply uncomfortable silence with something, anything, “Of our marriage.”

He trails off, glancing down at his feet and willing himself not to shed the tears that are stinging his eyes. He’s always known there was a risk that his marriage would be arranged. You aren’t Zora, you’re not royalty. It was a small chance that King Dorephan would even consider you in the running to marry Sidon. Your duty to Hyrule and Sidon’s duty to his people were always meant to clash. But he never thought it would be something to worry about this soon. His father’s decision to step down from the throne came as a shock, and the decision regarding Sidon’s marriage that much more shocking.

Your silence is killing him, gnawing at his insides, anxiety running rampant in his mind. Say something, anything. Please, he silently begs.

“When?” is all you’re able to question through your stupor. The look he gives you is grave, crestfallen.

“In less than a fortnight,” he almost whispers. He watches as your eyes fall slowly shut, as you clench your fists, your jaw. Every part of you tenses, but not out of anger. You take a deep breath and Sidon can tell you’re trying to hold in your tears. But when you exhale, they start to roll down your cheeks, dripping freely to the floor beneath. Droplets of pure moonlight shimmering as they fall. He rushes to you, scoops you into his arms, your small, Hylian form fitting so perfectly in his embrace. 

“I fought for us,” Sidon continues, as if he needs to prove to you that his love is genuine. As if you didn’t already know. Your shuddering sobs into his shoulder seem to shake the very foundation beneath you.  

“I fought so hard for us,” he whimpers, holding you closer, tighter, as if he were to let go, the moon would finally take you back to your celestial throne, “But my father wouldn’t agree. He wouldn’t- No matter how much I protested. How much I argued and debated-” 

“It’s okay,” you manage through tears, littering Sidon’s face with kisses, “I know you fought. I know you tried as hard as you could.”  

Sorrow blooms in every facet of your irises as you stare into Sidon’s gilded ones. If his heart hadn’t shattered in its entirety before, it certainly does now. He opens his mouth to say more, but he realizes he’s not even sure what he wants to say. He can’t reassure you. He can’t even reassure himself. 

A knock at your door pulls him begrudgingly from this private moment. An attendant calls out to him, "Your Highness, we should leave before it gets much later."

“They can wait,” Sidon speaks, turning back towards you, not wanting to leave you after such devastating news. You smile softly, shaking your head.

“No they can’t, my darling,” you gently return. He knows it, you know it. His royal duties, his people must always come first. You’ve never quibbled with him about this, something he deeply admires about you. 

Sidon presses a deep, lingering kiss to your lips. He can taste the salt of your tears, the salt of his own. He hadn’t even realized he’d shed any until the soft pads of your thumbs wipe them from his cheeks. He gazes at you underneath his furrowed brow, memorizing the features of your lovely face. If you dissolve into moonlight while he’s gone, he would never forgive himself for not kissing you one last time. 

“Wait for me,” he breathes when he pulls back, “We'll figure this- something out.” You nod, leaning your forehead against his and closing your eyes. Desperately, Sidon wishes he didn’t have to leave. Not in the middle of such an important conversation. 

“I should be no more than a few days,” he promises, giving you one final kiss before he wrenches himself from you and reluctantly slips out of your room. He doesn’t dare look back, knowing your melancholy gaze will destroy him if he does.

***

Sidon's diplomatic meeting with the Rito was a success, though it was mostly just a formality. The Zora and Rito are already on quite friendly terms, so he wasn't too concerned in the first place. The entire trip, however, his mind was preoccupied with you, with marriage, with grief. He's mulled over every possible solution. He contemplates further arguments with his father, knowing full-well that he won’t win them. But for you, it’s most certainly worth a try. He thinks about running away with you, eloping under the light of the moon, starting a new life on some remote island, far away from everything. But he knows he couldn’t leave his people behind, and he is certain that you won’t let him. Sidon could refuse to marry anyone at all, but that would mean he couldn’t be with you. But wouldn’t it be better to live his life alone if he can’t live it with you?

These thoughts swirl endlessly around his mind, a vortex of confusion and possibility. Nothing seems right. He loves you. No one else. He can’t imagine loving someone else. Or growing to love someone else. Up until now, Sidon has imagined spending the rest of his life with you. Of proposing marriage to you, in the customary Hylian fashion. Starting a family together, running the Zora kingdom together. Growing old with one another. Nights spent gazing up at the stars, held close in one another’s arms. Mornings waking up in your warm embrace. 

With his father’s decision, all hope Sidon had of making a life with you has been dashed. On his journey home, he tries to come up with some sort of solution, but as the Zora kingdom draws nearer and nearer, the Prince frustratingly comes up with nothing useful.

***

An attendant greets Sidon on the bridge leading into the palace, handing off a small slip of paper before dashing off again. The Prince unfolds the note, recognizing your handwriting immediately. “Meet me in our usual spot,” it reads, followed by a small heart and the first letter of your name. Sidon politely excuses himself from his fellow travelers and bolts off to meet you, hoping that you haven’t been waiting long for him.

By the time Sidon reaches Toto Lake, the moon is hovering high in the night sky, casting swathes of silver light across all of Hyrule. Its reflection wavers on the surface of the lake as Sidon’s keen eyes search for you. He spots you in the lake’s center, gliding through the water, every stroke disrupting the liquid mirror around you. The lake appears to envelope your form, encompassing you almost lovingly. Toto holds so many memories for Sidon. It’s where he sought solace after his sister’s passing. Where he found peace during the devastating years that Calamity Ganon reigned. The temperate waters have provided shelter in his most distressing times. It’s also where Sidon first pledged himself to you, promising his heart to you. And where you promised yours to him. A sacred, secret promise.

Sidon watches you for a moment. You cling to the crumbling ruins in the lake’s center, gazing up at the distant, twinkling stars above, not seeming to have noticed him yet. Crickets chirp in harmony with the nearby ribbits of hot-footed frogs, hiding stealthily amongst the scattered lily pads near the shore. Sidon wonders if this is the last time he’s ever going to see you, a thought that pierces his heart like a vicious barb. He can’t help but notice the pile of bags and personal items that you’ve left in the nearby clearing, like you’re prepared to travel a great distance.

Sidon is pulled from this painful thought when you wave to him, having finally noticed him lingering there. He waves back, somewhat apprehensive, but collects himself before diving into the lake. Sidon swiftly cuts through the water, desperate to reach you, the red of his fin cresting the surface of the lake. He wonders if he’ll reach you in time before the moon summons you home again. 

“My darling,” you exhale as he reaches you, pulling you into his embrace and holding you close. You cling to Sidon, the gentle thrum of your heart against his chest reinvigorating him after his long journey home. Why do you puzzle-piece so perfectly into his form? It seems like a cruel, cosmic joke that you would fit so neatly, so completely in Sidon’s arms. 

“You’re leaving?” he questions, pulling back to meet your sorrowful gaze. Gently, his large hand cups your cheek, one thumb smoothing over your soft skin. You lean your head to the side, letting your eyelids flutter shut as you press a tender kiss into the palm of his hand. 

“I must,” you state just barely above a whisper, a quiver in your voice that threatens to shatter Sidon’s already fragile calm, “I heard word around the palace that your bride-to-be arrives tomorrow.”

This is news to Sidon, news that washes waves of vertigo and anxiety over him. They threaten to drown him, pummel him into the silt and sand until he is nothing more than a smoothed over shell, tossed about in the surf. Sidon steadies himself, taking a deep breath, using your pleasant scent, your warmth as an anchor to this moment. Your cheeks are flushed and when you open your eyes once again, Sidon can tell that you’ve been crying, though you shed no tears in front of him. He wants to beg you to stay, to beseech the moon above and bargain that you might grace him just a little longer with your presence. What would it take for the heavenly bodies to allow you just a few hours longer with him?

“I will not accept that all we’re meant to be are star-crossed lovers,” Sidon states passionately, his tone filled with a steady resolve, “I cannot accept it. Was it not here that I pledged myself to you? And you to me? Was it not here that we promised our hearts to one another?” 

“Aren’t we more than just crossing tides?” he finishes. You contemplate this for a moment, before leaning your forehead against his. Beneath the cool sheen of water on your skin, Sidon feels the heat of your blood flowing strong through your veins. Your strength, your poise in this painful time serves as an example to him. He is always put together, always princely and regal. You let him fall apart, without judgement. Sidon can feel his composure fracture at your next words.  

“I think we come from the same ancient waters,” you begin, your hands coming to rest on either side of his face, “In some primordial sea, we rode the same tides. Perhaps someday, we shall again. But maybe this time around, we are only meant to flow together briefly, before we part.” 

“This cannot be,” Sidon whispers, voice wavering and tears beginning to roll down his cheekbones,“I feel your spirit ebb and flow inside of me. You inhabit me in a way that no one else ever has.” 

“I am with you, always. My soul is woven into every fiber of your being. And yours, mine,” you return, and with your exhale, warm tears flow from your bright eyes, “Sidon, I love you, body and soul.” 

He can take no more. Sidon crashes his lips into yours, feverish and desperate. You drape your arms over his shoulders, press yourself tightly to him. Perhaps the gracious moon will allow the two of you to merge, to live out the remainders of your lives as one being, one body, one soul. 

You wrap your legs around his waist, resting on his narrow hips while he grips your supple thighs. You’re bare to him already, your naked form bathed in silver moonlight. You are glorious, mesmerizing. A bright star, fallen to earth so that Sidon might marvel at your beauty, your mystery before you ascend to your place carved out in the heavens once again.

Sidon can feel his arousal growing as you palm his bulge, claspers pressing against his sheathe. Your warm tongue languidly explores his mouth, breath fanning softly against him. His hands smooth over your slick curves, worshipping every part of you. He commits the plushness of your body to memory, stores your soft moans and tiny gasps so that he might recall them later, in his loneliest hours. The way you breathe his name is holy and nearly brings him to his knees. 

“My darling, my pearl,” he whimpers pathetically as you trail kiss after searing kiss along his jawline and down his neck. Your teeth leave their bittersweet marks in his flesh, his talons dragging down your back, agonizing and delightful all at once. 

"I will bear your marks for all of time,” he announces, voice husky and low, “And know that I am yours, and you are mine."

“I am yours always. Sidon,” you coo, hand massaging torturously slow over his painful bulge, “In this lifetime, and the next. In all that we should ever exist in together. And even those that we do not.”

Sidon’s fingers tangle in the wet strands of your hair, tugging as he tilts your head so he can have better access to the tender spot of flesh behind your ear. He luxuriates in the lyrical moans that flutter from your lips as he nibbles and sucks at your sensitive skin. His warm tongue drags along your neck, goosebumps appearing in his wake. Your excitement fuels him, thrills him like nothing else does. His fingers find his way to your slick folds, running its length, dousing himself with you. 

He can’t contain himself any longer, his claspers freeing themselves from their sheathe. You're quick to grasp one, pumping slow and rhythmic. 

“Sidon, please, allow me,” you entreat, your doe-eyed glance up at him only spurring on his arousal. He releases his grip on you, gently setting you back in the water and letting you push him onto a nearby ledge of the ruins. If his people saw him now- oh, the very thought. How un-princely of him- an idea that inexplicably excites him. Prince Sidon- always so put together. Always so collected and proper. Prince Sidon- with the lips of a Hylian warrior, a celestial goddess, around one cock and her hand wrapped around the other. 

Your tongue swirls around his swollen tip, making him throw his head back in overwhelming pleasure as you doubly stimulate him. Your hand strokes him at one speed, while your mouth works at another, before you fall into a rhythm with both. Every once in a while, you pause to lick a stripe up either shaft, before diving back in once again. Desperate to have you near, Sidon weaves the fingers of your free hand with his own and grips tight. You squeeze back, letting him know you’re still present, though you seem happily preoccupied with both of his cocks. 

“Oh, you work miracles, my love,” he groans, chest heavy with pleasure. He stays your hand, lets you work with just your mouth on one of his claspers. It would bring him no greater pleasure than to come inside you, he explains. 

“Your wish is my command, my prince,” you impishly return, mischief glinting in your eyes. You only ever call him, “Prince,” in court, when you have to be more formal. Or in private, when you want to tease him. An electric pulse runs through the length of Sidon’s body at your devilish gaze. You grasp his thighs, nails digging into his flesh. The sensation sends waves of pleasure through him. As your head bobs up and down, Sidon tries his best not to buck his hips into you, but it’s so very difficult. The coil in his core tightens, threatening to snap at any moment. And when it finally does, you help him ride out the electrifying pulses of his first orgasm that night.

***

A burst of salt hits the back of your throat. Bright brine graces your tongue. Your chest feels warm as you swallow, like your body is trying to imbue itself with Sidon. Like you're trying to weave him into every fiber of your being. His ragged breath is music to your ears as you slide your mouth off him. With a wet pop you release him, a string of spit connecting him to you. A connection tenderly wiped away by one of Sidon’s massive thumbs. When you glance up at him, his eyes are dark with lust, slitted pupils wide in pools of molten gold. Sidon’s cheeks are rosy and his body temperature warm, so very warm compared to his usual chill. 

You hardly have a moment to catch your breath before Sidon draws you up to him, smashing his lips against yours. Your nails dig into the hard muscles of his back, his streamlined body pressed so deliciously against yours. Your heat is throbbing, every ounce of you heavy with arousal. Carefully, Sidon flips you over, laying you ever so gently on the slab of rock beneath. Your head is cradled by some of the snaking ivy growing on these ancient ruins. Sidon gazes down at you, eyes glimmering in the night. His look is one of curiosity, awe. Though he’s seen you bare to him so many times before, he looks at you like it’s the first time. 

“I am at your mercy,” he hushes, sweeping strands of your hair out of your face, before leaning down to tenderly press his lips to yours. He lays kiss-upon-kiss over your cheeks, down your neck, along your collarbone. Featherlight, he trails his lips down your chest, suckling gently on each of the pert buds of your nipples. His sharp teeth graze them softly before he makes his way down your abdomen. His hands knead your hips, cup and massage your breasts as his mouth reaches your heat. He wouldn’t dare tease you, but he can’t help nibbling at your thighs a bit, leaving little love-bites in his wake. After a moment of reveling in your plush inner-thighs, Sidon turns his attention to your pussy. His tongue is languid, warm, as he drags it along your folds. The moan that escapes your lips is salacious. You hear Sidon growl with excitement. He flicks his gilded gaze up at you before he softly kisses the sensitive nub of your clit. 

Sidon dives into you, lapping up your arousal like it’s his lifeblood. Like he simply cannot survive without the taste of you. He savors you, tongue slowly circling your clit, testing your entrance. You squirm under the firm grasp he has on your hips, bucking into him, causing him to chuckle at your eagerness. He hoists your legs over his broad shoulders, burying his head deeper into you. Sidon drinks you in like he’s parched. With each of your tiny mewls, you feel Sidon’s happy hums reverberating through your body. 

“Sidon, please,” you whine, smoothing one hand over the sleek fin atop his head, “I need to feel you in me.” 

He withdraws, the cool night air hitting your overheated folds surprising you. You gasp at its harshness, but Sidon is quick to replace the loss of heat with his hand, palming your sensitive pussy. When his lips meet yours, he tastes of you. 

“My darling, I’m yours. Entirely, completely. Every part of me. All parts of my soul,” he promises, his voice filled with conviction, with an aching passion. 

“I am yours, Sidon,” you return, breathless and longing, “Forever and always.” 

Tenderly, he spreads your legs, letting you wrap them around his waist, placing a large hand on the small of your back to help angle you. The stars overhead seem so close, so clear, like you’re encompassed in an endless dome of them. 

“Are you ready, my love?” Sidon asks, his cheeks flushed, breaths laborious. You nod enthusiastically, more than ready for him. He’s so slick, he slips into you with more ease than you expect. But he’s so big, you can feel him stretching out your entrance. He goes slow, gentle, allowing you ample time to adjust. Every few moments he asks if you’re alright. You stabilize yourself, arms slung around his chest, hands resting on his sinewy back. He’s cool to the touch, a sheen of water over his skin. 

With one of Sidon’s cock’s inside you, the other rests against your stomach. It’s hard again already, having recovered fast from your earlier ministrations. You grasp it gently, pumping rhythmically with Sidon’s rocking motions. A sultry moan falls from his lips at this double stimulation.

Sidon grinds slow and shallow for a while, before pressing deeper into you. You let go of the clasper resting against your stomach, allowing it to rest against you. With every pump into you, Sidon’s cock presses against the soft pad of your cervix. The pleasure is intense, your body quivering with each voltaic charge Sidon pulses into you. The heat generated between you is overwhelming, your bodies trying so desperately to merge into one. Your fingernails dig into his back, his talons into your thighs. Sidon buries his head into the crook of your neck, suckling little bruises, marking you. He delights in the way your breasts bounce with every motion. 

Goddess, please, let the moonlight fuse us into one, he begs, but he knows this cannot be. The two of you try your very best to do it yourselves. 

As Sidon grinds into you, the grip you have on his back prompts him to pick up his pace. 

“My darling, my pearl,” he manages to whisper, his breathing heavy, “You are, and always shall be, the light of my life.” 

“You are my moon, my stars, my light in the darkness,” you return, voice constrained by the taut coil in your core. Your walls quake around Sidon’s quivering cock. 

“Ha,” he huffs, pounding harder into you, “So close, my darling.” 

And so are you, but you can’t speak. For a moment later, the straining coil in you springs loose. Sidon’s name echoes through the clearing, a prayer in this ancient water temple. You cream around Sidon’s cock as he falls apart, his pace erratic as his hot cum fills your cunt. You feel even more paint your stomach, threads coating your abdomen from his other cock. Sidon calls out your name, a hymn to match yours. Sidon wonders if the moon hears the adoration, the infinite love in his voice. You know it does. 

When you’ve milked him for everything he’s worth, when he’s spent himself entirely inside you and on you, you pull Sidon down, crashing your lips into his. Feverishly, the two of you press kiss after kiss to one another, heated and yearning. You let the silence wash over you, grateful for the cool night breeze on your overheated bodies. After a while, Sidon gently pulls out of you, cock slick with your combined efforts. He pulls you into his embrace, cradling you in his arms. You belong here, enveloped by him. Enveloping him. How could the Goddess be so cruel to make you fit so perfectly, only to take you away from him?

“Leave in the morning,” Sidon begs, pressing a small kiss to the corner of your lip, “Please, stay one more night. Besides, it’s not safe.”

You shake your head, a rueful smile on your lips and sorrow in your eyes, “If I don’t leave now, it’ll be that much harder for me to leave tomorrow. And don’t worry, Zelda has sent forth people to retrieve me. They’ll be here within the hour. I’ll be okay.” 

Sidon’s heart can’t drop anymore, but if it could, it certainly would. He’s not sure what he expected to feel after everything that’s happened. The depth of his melancholy is too great for him to understand at the moment. It will take time for him to process. He doesn’t feel numb. No, instead he savors your embrace. He holds you close, littering your face with kisses, gently stroking your back while you rub small circles into his. If he could live in this moment forever, he would.

A horn blows in the distance, drawing the two of you out of your tender sanctuary in time. In the distance, you see lights on the bridge of the palace. It’s a Hylian caravan of guards, no doubt from the palace. No doubt sent here for you. You cling to Sidon’s back as he swims the two of you to shore. 

“I wish you could whisk me away on your back. I wish we could just keep swimming and not look back,” you murmur to him, laying a gentle kiss on his fin. 

“I do, too,” is all he can manage, trying so very hard not to shed any more tears. You dress quickly and Sidon helps you gather all your things. These are your last moments together. The bitter sweetness sticks in Sidon’s chest, viscous like tree sap, clinging to his ribs. Hand-in-hand you walk back down the cliff side and make your way to the bridge. Just out of sight of the Hylian caravan, you pull Sidon aside and lay your lips against his one more time. Your kiss is passionate and conveys every immense bit of your love for him. He hopes you can feel the same from him. 

When you pull back, your eyes are filled with adoration. And his with sorrow and love. You smile softly.

"The sea will carry us to one another,” you begin, tears trickling down your cheeks, “Time and again. I will find you in the next life, where our tides will be one and the same."

Sidon leans his forehead against yours, allowing his tears to fall freely.

“My heart belongs to you, always,” he breathes, “You reside in me, sheltered and safe.”

“You will always find a home in my heart,” you return, pressing one final kiss to his lips. Your hand lingers in his for a moment, before it slips from his grasp. Prince Sidon of the Zora watches your form grow smaller and smaller on the horizon, before it disappears behind the cliff sides, and he is left alone once again. 

A/N: Okay, don’t get me wrong, I actually think Lady Yona is adorable and I have all sorts of plans for some OC/Sidon/Link/Yona headcanons and drawings. But I couldn’t resist writing some Sidon/Reader angst!!!!!! Oh gosh, if I ever decide to do a follow up, there's just too many good options. a) Sidon refuses the arranged marriage and declares that he's marrying you, against his father's wishes b) Sidon decides to runaway with you and you live out the rest of your lives on a secluded island c) Sidon goes through with the marriage and you go your separate ways or, perhaps my favorite option, d) you, and Sidon, and Link, AND Yona become a happy little polycule because that would be adorable and wonderful (and I've said it before, but I'll say it again, if you know me, you know I love anything poly!!!!!!) Thank you so much for reading! This was a delight to write, though it definitely filled me with a lot of sadness. As always, likes and reblogs are greatly appreciated! Hope you are all doing amazing! Lots of love 💜

[straykuds]

Arguments with skz (hyung line)

This took an insanely amount of time and yep, my phone passed away twice before I could even complete it, so I managed to complete it on my laptop. I apologize for any mistakes found. And just to let you know, there is also a short fanfic after every argument.

This is purely fiction. Good luck reading, my fellow delulus

Warning: angst, comfort

This is my first time writing a fanfic, so please go easy on me. Merci 🌜

Bangchan

With tears in your eyes, you threw your phone on your bed, purely out of rage and hurt. All you wanted was nothing but his attention and of course, he just had to hurt your feelings, making you feel like you were nothing to him.

Eventually, you ended up sleeping after a while of crying your eyes out but then you woke up to a weighted feeling on your waist.

Already knowing who it was due to the smell of his cologne, you reached out to his arm and shoved it away. There was no doubt that you were still very mad at him.

" Y/n" he called your name, but you didn't dare move an inch, nor make an effort to see his face.

Chan let out a soft sigh. It was very clear that he'd regretted what he'd said to you earlier. He didn't mean it, he never meant all those things he said to you.

" I'm sorry" he apologized. " All those things I said earlier, I never meant any of them, I promise." He explained, hoping to get some reaction from you but your face was turned away from him, beads of tears brimming your eyes.

Knowing Chan for a very long time, you knew he probably didn't mean any of those things he said to you (even though they were hurtful words).

" I don't want you to pressurize yourself into being around me if that makes you happy"

Just after those words spilled out of your mouth, you felt his arms around you and before you knew it, you were already facing him with his soft lips connected to yours. You didn't fight back, you'd missed him too much to push him away.

Pulling away, he stared into your eyes lovingly. " I'm the happiest when I'm with you, darling," he smiled softly. " And just to let you know, you're not selfish to ask for my attention. I'm sorry for not being the boyfriend you need me to be. I'm sorry for letting you down. You don't deserve any of th-"

He paused immediately as you brought your lips to his. " I forgive you." You mentioned.

" Really?" He asked, his eyes widening a bit. Nodding, he gave him a peck on his lips for more confirmation. But then your little moment was cut off by you letting out a yawn.

" Can we go to sleep now?" You asked, your eyes already starting to feel droopy. Pulling you closer to him, he wrapped his strong arms around you but right before you fell asleep, you heard a soft " I love you"

Lee know

" Good gracious, y/n what are you doing here?" Felix exclaimed, his eyes widening in utter shock. I mean, who wouldn't be when a person appears on their doorstep at midnight.

" Can I sleep here tonight? I don't really feel like sleeping at the apartment"

Not even needing to consider it, he opened the door widely, letting you in. He was your best friend after all, there was no way he'd say no to you.

Sensing that something was wrong with you, he decided not to question you knowing fully well that you'd only talk about it when you're ready so instead he gave you the extra bedroom he had for tonight.

Space was all your boyfriend needed and that's what you were giving him.

And with that thought on your mind, you drifted off to sleep.

Two hours had passed. Your bloodshot eyes slowly opened up. Your throat, dry as the Sahara desert, your body temperature, hot as hell and your head, pounding. All because of the tears Lee know had caused you to shed.

Looking around the room, you felt empty. Yes, you were extremely mad at your boyfriend but at the same time, there was no denying that you missed him. His touch, his kisses...his everything.

You reached out for your phone on the nightstand and to your utmost shock, you'd gotten over 30 missed calls all from Lee Know. To be honest, you felt very touched at the fact that he was worried for you and a tiny bit of you had forgiven him even though he was yet to apologize.

But at that moment, all you needed was a glass of water. Walking out of the room, you couldn't help but hear muffled voices coming from the living room. Recognizing Felix's voice, you wondered who he was talking to. Curious, you advanced further but then stopped in your tracks when you made eye contact with a familiar face.

" Lee Know..." You whispered to yourself. Before you could process anything else, you were pulled into the arms of your worried looking boyfriend.

" I'm so stupid. I shouldn't have asked you for space. I don't know what I was saying. I was so worried about you, y/n. I'm so sorry for hurting you. I was having a bad day and took out my anger on you, that was so low coming from me. Please forgive me" he rambled, not even sparing a breath.

Not having the strength to shed any more tear, you pulled away from him and looked into his eyes. " It's okay, you're forgiven." You faintly smiled.

Coming closer to you, he pecked your forehead and looked down at you, considering your height difference. " Let's go home, shall we?"

Changbin

It was your two years anniversary with each other and you'd planned a well prepared dinner for just the two of you in the comfort of your home. You'd stayed up waiting for him, dressed in your finest clothing and simple jewelry.

The expectations you'd have of the night was brought down to the drain as now, you were sat on your living room floor, trying to drain your tears with ice cream. You couldn't believe it.

A year ago, Changbin had made a promise never to drink again, knowing fully well on how much you despised alcohol because it reminded you of your bad childhood. You still couldn't process the fact that he'd forgotten about your anniversary.

Your thoughts came to a halt when the doorbell rang. Knowing it was him, you got up from the ground and walked over to open it up for him, allowing him in and now here you were, the both of you staring into each other's eyes. None of you saying a word.

Looking at him made you feel more pissed off than before. Trying to walk away from him, he grabbed your hand and turned you to look at him.

" Can we talk?" He asked, now sober and back to his senses.

" There's nothing to talk about. Goodnight." You wriggled your hand out of his grip.

" Y/n..."

" Look Changbin, I'm very tired right now and literally have no strength to talk to you. Whatever you wanna say can wait."

Just like that, you walked away from him and made your way to your bedroom where you cried the rest of your tears to sleep. Safe to say, he found it hard to sleep that night.

The very next morning, he'd done everything possible to earn your forgiveness and let me say, it took a really long time because he ended up making up for the previous day, but on the bright side, y'all's relationship was back to normal.

Hyunjin

" Babe, hear me out," Hyunjin pleaded, following you around the house as you did basic chores. After the last text you'd sent to him, he came running all the way from work to apologize to you and unfortunately for him, you were having none of it.

" I'm sorry, I swear I didn't mean it."

Sighing frustratingly, you whipped your head around to glare at him. " Can you stop trailing me around? You're starting to get on my nerves now." You told him.

" I'm very sorry. You're not annoying, nor are you pushy. I'm just very dumb and stupid for even saying that. You deserve to be treated like royalty"

" You like someone else?" You asked, crossing your arms.

" Fuck, no, y/n. You're the only one I love, please forgive me for what I said. From now on, I promise to give you all the attention you want."

" You mean it?" You asked again, squinting your eyes at him. He nodded frantically. Giving him one more look, you forgave him and almost immediately, he tackled you into a hug and spoilt your face with kisses.

At the end of the day, the both of you ended up spending your evening at the cinema.

I hope you like it. Sorry for any mistakes found 🤗

[noahjustcried]

Sagacious (Service Top!Reader x Sub!Emily Prentiss)

part two of the slightly cohesive Shrewd series.

Warnings: NSFW MDNI 18+, Not gonna lie this one is raunchy, angst, period sex (I didn't spare any details so... if it makes you uncomfy DO NOT READ) , emily snaps at reader, gets kinda fluffy, emily sheds tears, reader being an adorably understanding bean

You were basically brain dead at the moment. The only sound that could be heard was the rushing of your blood in your ears. The only thing you could see was Emily with a blank look on her face but piercing eyes that told you exactly how she felt.

Emily had been short today. Aggravated even. And you couldn’t put your finger on why. Her steps were heavier as her heels clicked around the precinct while she gave orders and built a profile. She’d even dressed differently. Usually she’d throw in some sort of bold color to her outfits: a red shirt, a blue blouse, a cream sweater. But not today. Today she had on that black turtleneck, and black slacks. She looked ominous.

You weren’t allowed much time to analyze before she was barking orders at you and rushing you to the M.E.’s. You confirmed her stiff attitude with Penelope on the way to the examiner’s. 

She’d agreed Emily was acting pissy.

“You seem focused.” JJ muttered sarcastically when you got back to the precinct and immediately collided shoulders with some beat cop in the hallway.

“Like a laser.” You replied not even sparing her a glance as you passed by her.

The woman was harder to read than the Necronomicon when she wanted to be. And she hadn’t had an actual conversation with you in three days. You couldn’t reach her. Until you reached the hotel.

The brunette handed out everyone's key cards in the hotel lobby before making an excuse to take the next elevator claiming she’d forgotten her bag, though it was in your hand. You were standing away from the rest of the group glaring at a vending machine in the corner of the lobby and missed the interaction. Well you hadn’t missed it, you avoided it. And you weren’t glaring at the vending machine you were glaring through it at the reflection, Emily’s reflection.

“Y/L/N, are you gonna buy something or what?” Her voice had an edge to it, one you hadn’t earned.

You took a deep breath before replying. “I’m good," You turned on your heels and glared at her more directly. Your eyes scanned her figure then her face, “Are you?”

The older woman huffed dramatically, her shoulders falling and her hand came to rest against her forehead in what you could only assume was ever-building frustration. “I’m fine, here.” She stalked towards you, her footsteps still heavier than usual. She held out the card with the hotel’s logo printed on the front. You took the card between your index and middle finger.

“Emily...”

“Don’t start.” She interrupted before striding toward the elevator with you trailing after her.

“Em—“you tried again when the elevator started moving.

“For fucks sake, can you not!” She snaps. Her voice was pitched upwards and she was avoiding your gaze.

You cleared your throat before sucking your cheek between your teeth, chewing in thought.

“You’re frustrated.”

The woman trilled her lips, her palms came up to her face and she buried her face inside her hands. “I’m not frustrated, you just don’t seem to know how, or when to shut up.”

You raised your eyebrows, your lips were curling upwards. You could take her words personally but that wouldn’t benefit anyone right now. the doors slid open with a ding. You followed close behind her a few steps removed.

Your room was across from hers, perhaps just another way for her to keep an eye on you. she liked having you under her nose even if she didn’t claim you outwardly.

You watched her click her door open and without a second thought you handed her her bag before shoving her forward gently and basically forcing yourself into her hotel room. The door clicked shut behind you.

She had already opened her mouth to curse, yell, scream? You weren’t sure because the words never made it out of her mouth because you slapped your hand over it. When she brought her hands up to slap you away you nabbed her wrist continuing to back her up until she was in the center of the room, the bed a foot or two behind her.

You gestured for her to be quiet then dropped your hand from her pink lips. Your voice was soft yet assertive as you spoke. you stripped your jacket off your shoulders. “You are frustrated..or stressed. I don’t know you suck at communicating but the point is you are not fine. You have been bitchy, and combative all day if it isn’t one thing it’s another.”

“Bitchy?” Emily challenged. You could tell her repetition of the word was not due to a lack of clarity, it was a challenge, or mercy. A chance to take it back. You wouldn’t.

You bent down and ripped your loafers off your feet before shedding your overshirt, leaving you in a pair of patterned slacks, black socks and a black tank top. “Bitchy.” You reiterated. “And it got me thinking..."

"...Three days of silent treatment; I was left with nothing but time to ponder.” You grumbled, gathering the top layer of your hair and tying it behind your head.

“It didn’t click until I saw you getting all watery eyed on the elevator.” Emily was lost for words as she watched you fall to your knees in front of her. She knew what you were planning to do, and she couldn’t let you proceed. So, when your long fingers met her belt buckle she stopped you.

“I can’t.” She cracked. “I’m uh—” you waved her off.

“On your cycle? I know.” You nodded firmly your eyes meeting hers with nothing but lust, determination, and something much softer. “Let me take care of you.” You purred, pulling her belt free from the buckle and working on the button and zipper.

“Y/N,” she whimpered. Literally whimpered. “I’m bleeding, that’s unsanitary at the very least.”

“Emily.” you reassured. “I don’t care.” You tugged her pants down to her thighs then past her knees. “But if you say no we can stop right now and just go to sleep, or if you actually want to be alone I’ll leave right now just tell me what you need so I can help. Her eyes had begun to water again her lips pursed together as her hand came up to your cheek.

“You don’t have to do this, baby.” She whispered, sniffling immediately after.

“I want to. More than anything in the world. I want you, all of you everyday of the month, blood isn’t gonna get in the way of that, not for me.”

You watched her carefully scanning her tear stained face for the first time in days you saw that light in her eyes again. She nodded at you and you grinned a Cheshire grin.

You started with her shoes this time tugging them from her feet then doing the same to her pants and turtleneck she was near bare. Left in a navy blue bra and cotton panties to match.

“Tell me if it’s too much.” You muttered guiding her the last foot until her knees met the comforter and she took a seat.

You placed a kiss on each thigh. Before you reached for the waistband of her panties. She stopped you.

“I want them on.”

“Okay.” You smiled softly and instead of going with your original plan you placed a hand over her diaphragm and applied pressure ushering her into lying down.

“Just try to relax, darling.” You drawled letting your hand caress over her tummy. Rubbing against it as your other hand teased between her thighs which she had clamped shut. You sighed some frustration of your own trying to boil its way to the surface.

You brought your hand to her right bosom and gave a soft squeeze that left her knees trembling.

“Sensitive?” You inquired, slipping your fingers below the material and groping at the flesh again

This time you could feel her pebbled nipple scraping your palm. You ran a thumb over it, which sent a shiver down the older woman’s spine and made her clamped thighs fall apart slightly.

When you looked up at her face she was already looking down at you with her lip tucked between her teeth as she nodded in response.

You purred, dragging your hand further up her thigh with an open palm. Your left hand came to rest over her cotton covered mound, a curious thumb softly ghosting over her puffy labia. Your right thumb did something similar to her nipple.

A high hum vibrated from the older woman’s throat, a moan muffled by her bitten lips.

“You’re so beautiful, Emily.” You purred as you pinched her nipple gently. Sensitivity was fun, until it wasn’t and you didn’t want to hurt her, not in any way she wouldn’t enjoy, though it was entirely too soon.

You felt her cunt throb against your teasing thumb and smirked pushing her panties aside and parting her lips with two fingers. You smiled at the little string hanging from her entrance and leaned in experimentally. You inhaled, her sweet scent enveloped your nose. You placed a small kiss on her pink button and felt her thighs twitch.

“Emily?” You called. Voice barely above a whisper. Her head popped up from where she had relaxed it on the mattress. “Why don’t you go in the restroom and take this out for me, darling.”

You suggested softly while giving the string a minute tug. She looked as if she wanted to argue or maybe she didn’t believe you when you said you didn’t care.

She cleared her throat and sat up despite her reservations, which had nothing to do with you and everything to do with the fact she was overthinking. “I don’t know if—”

Your eyes darted to the wall behind her head. You felt it was time to reiterate your point. “Go in the restroom and take the tampon out so I can devour you the way you deserve, please.”

Emily’s eyebrows raised while you quirked your head daring her to challenge you. You sighed after another thirty seconds of staring. “Okay, you know what.” 

With that you rose on your knees to kiss her lips, your thumb making circles against her clit, causing her to moan into the kiss as you worked her up. Your lips slid from hers to her cheek then her jaw, you nipped at her ear lobe and felt her clit pulse, so you did it again and again until she wouldn’t stop pulsing against you. Her hands placed on the mattress propping her up as you worked her over with just your thumb and her swollen bundle of nerves until she was trembling at the touch.

“Three,” you whispered, brushing her clit faster. “Two,” she moaned out into the open air as you added more pressure, her eyes squeezed shut and her arms trembling under her weight. All while your pointer finger was wrapping itself in the string dangling from her entrance.

She was close. You could tell because her arms were faltering, about to give out any second and her legs kept trying to clamp shut around your torso, though you wouldn’t let her.

You watched her arms give out and her back arch, soon after her heels were digging into your back to pull you closer.

“Please.” She whimpered out.

“One.” You breathed and tugged the string until the bloody cloth was free and her legs clamped around you as your ministrations on her clit pushed her over the edge.

“Oh! Fuck!” She cried. You tossed the tampon in the nearest bin from where you were sitting and you grinned leaning forward to finally indulge.

Your tongue dipped into her entrance hungrily. The metallic taste not deterring you in the slightest. In fact, with the way you were slurping and sucking at her labia and entrance Emily was fairly convinced the taste was spurring you on, though she was more focused on the pleasure your tongue was bringing to her, and here she thought your fingers were amazing. Which , they are but this, this was something else and it was driving her crazy.

She hadn’t stopped cumming and her juices as well as your saliva were smeared across your face and beginning to drip past your jaw.

“You taste so good, baby.” You pulled away but only to use your fingers to spread her puffy pink folds apart.

“Holy Fuck!” She expelled before tumbling into another fit of moans as you sucked at her clit and flicked it with your skilled tongue rapidly. Her own hands came up to squeeze at her heaving breasts. You had to close your eyes or you’d have another accident like last time.

One of her hands tugged at your hair and ripped you away from her folds much to soon and Emily almost came again at the sight of you, your perfect hair messy and flowing between her fingers, your flexed jaw, and hungry tongue lapping up her blood and arousal that was smeared on your lips, your hands flexing on her thighs, and your dark eyes glassy and hazy mind only on one thing: her pussy.

The way you were eating her made her think you forgot that the organ was attached to an actual person.

“Fuck, you’re so hot.” She whispered dragging you atop herself and leaning up to kiss your swollen, blood stained lips.

“Thanks, mami.” You breathed, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand ungraciously.

“Better now?”

A smirk slid across her cheeks as she chuckled. “Much.”

“Good.” Your hoarse voice breathed out resting your head on her milky thighs like the perfect forbidden pillow.

"You have to learn to let me take care of you. You can push me away as long and as far as you want, I will always be here to take care of you."

"Always?" came her broken whisper her eyes watering again as she brings her slender fingers to stroke through your hair and massage your scalp delightfully.

"As long as you'll have me. Until the day you can look me in the eyes and tell me that you want nothing to do with me. I'll be yours." You mumble confidently, planting an affectionate kiss on her thigh reveling in the feeling of her fingers stroking your scalp.

Her other hand comes up to her own face and swipes away the stray tears sliding down her cheeks as her heart flutters. "Okay." She replies softly pulling the covers up to cover the both of you your head under the blanket as you drift off to sleep with her fingers still stroking your hair as you rest on her thigh.

[jjameslily]

tied to you, ch.2

soulmate au - a continuation of my microfic posted for jilymicofic's august prompt.

ch. one | ch. two on ao3, chapters are 1k or less

James sat at the kitchen table, his small hands clasped around a glass of milk. His mother hovered nearby, her eyes trained anxiously on her son’s face.

“Do you want more strawberries, sweetheart?” she asked, her voice laced with concern as she placed a plate of freshly sliced fruit in front of him.

James nodded absently, a tear trickling down his cheek as he stared at the red slices. His mother’s brow furrowed, and she knelt beside him, brushing the tear away with a gentle thumb.

“You’re crying again,” she murmured, more to herself than to him, her heart tightening with each tear he shed. She’d already scheduled another appointment with a different healer, her mind racing with the possibility that they had missed something – some crucial detail that might explain these sudden outbursts.

As James absentmindedly nibbled on the fruit, his mother leaned back against the counter watching her son eat the very same fruit he’d had a deep-seeded aversion to for years.

She knew, deep down, that he was special, a miracle born to them after years of trying. But the worry gnawed at her, making her question whether they were doing everything they could for him, whether they understood him fully.

​​"A soulmate?" James repeated after the healer, the word foreign on his tongue.

He sat on the cushioned chair of the medical room days later, his small legs dangling above the floor, as the healer’s gentle gaze rested on him. His mother’s hand settled on his head, her fingers lightly stroking his hair.

James blinked, the weight of the healer’s words sinking in. He looked up at his mother, her eyes shimmering with a soft light, a smile playing on her lips.

“Those feelings that don’t seem like yours,” the healer said, her tone tender, “those stray thoughts and odd sensations – they belong to your soulmate. She’s hurting, and when her pain is strong, you feel it too, because the two of you are tied.”

“My soulmate is sad?” he asked, his voice small.

The healer nodded, her expression full of understanding. “It seems so,” she confirmed gently.

His small mind turned over the idea and a simple, childlike conclusion formed. If having a soulmate was a good thing, then he should do everything in his power to make sure they were happy.

Determination filled his chest, and he beamed up at his mother, his eyes bright with resolve. “Then I’ll always be as happy!” he declared, his voice rising with excitement. “I’ll think of all my best memories and tell so many jokes! Then they can laugh and not be sad anymore!”

His mother’s smile widened, a hint of pride shining through. She leaned closer, brushing a lock of hair from his forehead. “My special boy,” she said, her voice brimming with warmth.

---

Please come back , she called out, a desperate plea repeated over and over.

The voice he had yearned to hear, the one he had imagined he'd heard in countless dreams, now reached out to him – soft and muted, as though straining to breach the wall she had carefully constructed over the years, layer by layer. 

For the first time in what felt like forever, he truly felt her presence. But it was no longer the accidental, almost imperceptible brush against the edges of his consciousness that he had grown accustomed to. This time, her presence surged through him, powerful and urgent, breaking through with a force that left him breathless.

Tears welled up uncontrollably, his chest tightening so much that he curled his fingers around his chest to try to ground himself. It was like a hole opening inside him, and yet, even in knowing these feelings were not his own, the realization only made the pain sharper and the ache more unbearable.

James was slumped on the floor, his breath hitching as the wave of sadness washed over him. It had been years since he’d felt their connection with such force – so long since she had let him in. He could sense the darkness swirling in her mind, an ache deep and unrelenting.

He closed his eyes, trying to find anything that might bring her comfort. But no matter how desperately he wanted to break through, it was like shouting through soundproof glass, his voice lost before it even had a chance to reach her.

His heart ached with the desire to share her joy, to feel her laughter ripple through him. But all he ever glimpsed were these shadowed corners, these fleeting moments of pain that she couldn’t hide. He was left on the outside, only able to hope that he might one day know her.

For now, all he had were these accidental moments, these brief windows into her troubled soul. And even as he longed for more, he knew he would treasure every glimpse, no matter how dark, because it was the only way he could be close to her.

He whispered a string of reassurances like prayers, his voice barely more than a breath. Each word felt like it was traveling through a long, dark tunnel, trembling with the uncertainty that this might shatter their fragile connection.

It’ll be okay. It’ll be okay. It’ll be okay.

I know you’re hurting. I know you’re hurting.

I’m here. I’m here. I’m here.

He felt her presence falter, retreating again into the shadows until it was almost gone like mist dissipating in the night.

Just as James thought he was alone again, something stirred in the quiet recesses of his mind. A faint hum, barely noticeable, buzzed at the edges of his consciousness. It was weak, almost lost in the vast emptiness, but as he focused, a tiny flicker of light sparked.

Though dim, James clung to it, knowing that as long as it burned it would be his guiding light, the beacon that kept his childhood promise alive – to bring her the happiness he had vowed to give, no matter how many years had passed.

[nxrdamp]

For a S/V prompt, how about some fluff with Arven & gender-neutral MC taking a well-deserved rest after the events of Area Zero.

I used to have a puffy vest like his, and they are SOFT. I imagine resting one's head on his chest must feel like heaven.

Arven x Gn! Reader -Comfort at Last

Masterlist

After the devastating realization that the only parent he “had”, hadn’t been there the whole time, Arven felt more alone than ever.

Even when Nemona insisted they all walk back together, he stayed silent.

“How the hell can she be so happy?! That was my parent, back there as a AI!!! The AI even left me….”

I don’t even think my (mother/father) got a proper burial….” Arven thought to himself, struggling farther and farther behind the group

After a few moments, the group left him entirely, as he snuck away. While everyone else was headed back to (Naranja/Uva) Academy, he ran back to his (mother’s/father’s) old research center by the lighthouse

He locked the door as soon as he ran in, and collapsed, letting the tears flow from his eyes.

Mabosstiff came out of his pokéball on his own, snuggling up to Arven to comfort him.

“Why Mabosstiff? Why did you have to raise me? I love you, but I just want them back. I want my (mom/dad)….”

Mabosstiff let out a sad bark, nuzzling his face into Arven’s neck.

Days when by, and still not sign of Arven. Nemona couldnt really bother herself to look and Penny didn’t really know him that well.

(Y/n), however, was searching all over Paldea for him. Even going back to Area Zero to see if he was hiding in the 4th research station to mourn his loss

Eventually, they were walking back to their mother’s house, to seek advice.

Arven was loosing his mind, first he lost his parent, and then Mabosstiff ran away. Was it because he was too pathetic to face reality? Or something else. He didn’t know.

————

(Y/n) was strolling down Poco path, before being pinned to the ground.

“H-Hey! What the hell?!”

They crawled out of the captor’s grasp, to get a good look at them.

It was Mabosstiff, he had left Arven to find help.

“Hey Mabosstiff” (Y/n) said, worried,”Where’s Arven? Is he okay?!”

Mabosstiff shook his head no

“Can you show me to him?”

Mabosstiff gave a bark in reply, agreeing to their request.

“Alright” (Y/n) replied,”We’re going to him right now. I’m……I’m really scared Mabosstiff. I want my friend back. I want him.”

Mabosstiff took that as all the confirmation he needed, and took off, dragging (Y/n) behind him across Pogo Path, leading to the place where they first met, the place where Arven’s (mother/father) used to conduct research.

The two of them walked up to the door, before letting out a shaky sigh.

“Here goes nothing…” They whispered to themselves

(Y/n) then gave a firm knock on the door, only to hear a response of shuffling around the room, and disgruntled noises.

“Ugh. Go away.” Arven said, not even bothering to open the door to see who his visitor is.

Mabosstiff barked, demanding the door to be opened at once.

He ripped the door open, ready to pounce on whoever had his partner.

“YOU-“ Arven said, stopping in his tracks before locking eye contact with (Y/n).

Mabosstiff jumped on Arven, giving him a puppy-hug, as (Y/n) stepped into the dusty, once not so long ago abandoned, research facility.

They coughed from the dust being stirred up, only to find an inflatable mattress on the floor, that looked as if it had seen better days. It was adorned with tear stains and shedded fur.

“Why are you here? Student council girl send you for ‘attendance’ or something?” Arven said, shutting the door to let no one else in.

“No. She actually doesn’t know I’m here. Penny either. I……I care for you Arven. I do. I know Area Zero must have fucked with you in the head. I know that, but….please…I wanna be there for you. I’ll never be or replace your (mom/dad), but you do have people that care for you in your life! Well, I don’t know anyone else’s true feelings, but I know mine. You….mean so much to me. I can’t stand you being so….alone”

They walked over to him, cupping his cheek as tears flowed from his eyes at their sweet, encouraging words. “Arven…” (Y/n) said,”I love you. Always will. Plus, you can’t get rid of me. Mabosstiff will just team up with me again.”

Arven let out a chuckle, before hugging them so hard they both fell onto the aged mattress.

“A-Arven!!” (Y/n) laughed, crawling out from underneath him. They then rested their head upon his fluffy, yellow vest.

“I love you too (Y/n)….please know I wasn’t abandoning you-“

“Don’t apologize.” They said, holding him tighter to hear his increased heartbeat,”You lost a parent for Arceus’s sake! I was worried about you, not mad Arvy.”

He sniffled,”Thank you” He said quietly,”Thank you for always being there for me….no one else is-“

Mabosstiff let out a rebuttal, but in the form of an angry bark.

“-besides you and Mabosstiff” Arven finished, laughing his tears away as Mabosstiff tried to smush the both of them on the mattress.

“Just rest” (Y/n) told him,”We’ll worry about Clavell and Nemona chewing our asses out for attendance later”

He gave them a kiss on the forehead, and the three of them got some well deserved rest

Word Count: 898

[electronickingdomfox]

"The Entropy Effect" review

Novel from 1981, by Vonda N. McIntyre (same author of the novelizations for the Star Trek movies II, III and IV). This is also the first TOS novel of the Pocket Book line, not counting the novelization for TMP. Even though the Bantam books have some nice stories (in particular, those by the Haldeman brothers are pretty decent), they all seem more like episodes of the series. This is the first time I had the impression of reading a proper novel, and the leap in quality is evident. I really, really liked this novel. It's also veeeery sad; it even made me shed some tears. Of course the reader knows this is Star Trek, and everything will turn out fine in the end, but the sense of despair the author conveys is quite effective nonetheless.

The characters are given much depth, and even the bunch of new additions receive proper attention, and their own side-stories and aspirations. The relations between the triumvirate are pretty much flawless (with echoes from "The Tholian Web"; Spock and McCoy are the real protagonists here). And surprisingly, Sulu has his own subplot and a romance story.

I can't really think of many downsides. Maybe it's a bit slow at the beginning, specially since it needs to introduce the new cast. But as I found the original characters interesting and likeable, it wasn't a major issue for me. Also, the story involves time-travel, so expect the usual head-scratching moments. Though as far as I noticed, there were no plot holes.

Some spoilers below the cut:

Spock is investigating an unusual black hole, and his observations make him reach the disturbing conclusion that entropy is rapidly accelerating, and the universe may have little more than 100 years to disappear. He's about to confirm his suspicions, when the Enterprise is suddenly diverted to the Aleph Prime station by a maximum priority message, so Spock has to leave his work half-finished.

In the station, they're greeted by prosecutor Ian Braithewaite, who is confused at first, since he didn't send any urgent message. Nonetheless, he had asked for a ship to help him bring a prisoner to a rehabilitation colony, so Kirk accepts, once he learns the identity of such prisoner. He's an old physics professor of Spock: George Mordreaux, and Spock is sure he can prove his mentor's innocence, for the charges of murder and unethical experimentation. But when he tries to learn more about the case, he finds all info and details have been erased, so there's something definitely fishy about it all. In the station, Kirk also reunites with Captain Hunter, an old girlfriend, and has serious doubts about his decision to break up with her. He even considers the option of leaving the Enterprise and giving another chance at their relationship. For his part, Sulu has fallen in love with the new security chief: Mandala Flynn. But leaves her, and the Enterprise, to join Hunter's crew, in the hope that this will further his career.

Thus the Enterprise, minus Sulu, starts the trip to the rehab colony, with Modreaux and Braithewaite aboard. Spock insists the professor isn't dangerous, and places minimal security on him. Everything goes awry when the professor appears inexplicably on the bridge, and shoots Kirk and Mandala with a spiderweb gun. This spiderweb has really gruesome effects: it creates some sort of metallic web inside a body, which expands quickly through all organs, even covering the eyes. However, Mordreaux doesn't seem to have left his cell at all, and no intruder or imposter is found aboard. Soon thereafter, Mandala is dead. While McCoy completely breaks down, and insists on keeping Kirk artificially "alive" through machines (though deep down, he knows Kirk is dead for real). In the end, Spock convinces McCoy to disconnect the machines. And there's a gut-wrenching scene, in clinical detail, where McCoy starts turning off all the life systems on him.

After Kirk's death, Spock and McCoy are left in a similar situation as in "The Tholian Web". Though in the episode Kirk had simply disappeared, so there was still hope. Here things are far more depressing. McCoy can't accept Kirk's death, and pressures Spock to try time-travel to save him. Spock refuses to play like that with the space-time continuum. However, while interrogating the professor in his cell, Spock learns that the real reason he's convicted, is because he's been tampering with time travel through a new device. This disruption may be behind the entropy effects Spock had previously discovered. And it's also behind the murder of Kirk, at the hands of a future, insane version of Mordreaux. Since all these events are the results of time alterations, Spock needs, in fact, to travel back in time, and restore things to their original order.

With the help of the (still sane) professor, Spock initiates a series of failed attempts at fixing things in the past. While gradually deteriorating through each time travel. And McCoy has a hard time, being left in charge of the ship and covering up for Spock (they can't tell anyone else about the device, in fear of being arrested for it, just as Mordreaux). Meanwhile, Braithewaite is being a pain in the ass, and gets paranoid about Spock and McCoy having conspired to murder Kirk. He even manages to make Scotty suspicious of them, so things get even more complicated.

In summary, the stakes are pretty high, and the story gets really exciting (and sometimes frustrating for poor Spock and McCoy).

McSpirk Meter: 10/10. I usually only rate the Kirk/Spock material, since is far more common, and ranges wildly from one novel to another (with some of them being borderline slash). But in this occasion is impossible to separate the members of the triumvirate, as the love goes in all three directions.

For starters, there's Spock casting aside all his reservations about hand touching, when Kirk is shot with the spiderweb (maybe this is the first time it's explicitly stated that Vulcans avoid touching hands?). He tries to mind-meld with Kirk while he's dying, perhaps to die himself instead, but Kirk pushes him away to save him.

Then there's the absolutely devastating effect that Kirk's death has on McCoy. He gets totally drunk, breaks down among sobs, and finally passes out. Spock carries him in his arms and puts him to bed; then keeps watch while he sleeps. Later, McCoy starts crying again while viewing Kirk's last will. But once he learns it's possible to bring him back, he's all sunshine once more. Still, the mere reliving of his death is enough to bring him to tears, even while on the bridge. McCoy's pain for losing Kirk is also compared to that of Hunter (who was Kirk's lover), and Sulu's grief for Mandala (also a lover). When Hunter asks McCoy what he has to gain by helping Spock in his mysterious plans, he answers "everything".

Spock deals with the loss of his Captain in a far more subdued, Vulcan way, but it's evident he's falling apart too. He doesn't want to stay in the Enterprise anymore, and once he completes his duties aboard, he's probably going to leave Starfleet altogether.

McCoy has also some tender moments with Spock while treating his wounds, and choosing civilian clothes for him (which he says that enhance Spock's eyes).

Once everything's been solved, Spock lies in bed while recovering, and Kirk and McCoy take turns watching him. Only Spock remembers the events of the altered timeline (for everyone else it feels just like a nightmare). And Spock's reaction upon waking up and seeing Kirk alive has to be read to believe it. Let's say, a mixture of "this simple feeling", and his smile at the end of "Amok Time".

[writing-for-life]

So, you mentioned something about Thessaly in a 90s context in one of your responses to another post, and I was wondering if you could expand on that. Because yeah, I have no problem with her *existing* as a character, because obviously she has a role in the narrative, but I highly suspect that her perceived role has changed a LOT in the intervening years since the initial writing.

As someone who first read Sandman in 2022, I figured that her character role was to get us to question what we think we know about Morpheus. Can we really trust that he's changed or improved, or that he's even all that likeable, if he's literally jumping into bed with this thoroughly unpleasant woman who likes violent murder *way* too much and also seems to be transphobic to boot?

At the same time, though, I got the uncomfortable sense that we were supposed to *like* Thessaly. In a sort of, "You go girl, be a #girlboss, let's show these boys we can be JUST as good at killing as them!" sort of way. Which I rationalized as "well, that probably was progressive in the 90s, but the idea of cold blooded violence and emphasis on the possession of a womb being feminist ideals has aged poorly."

So, yeah, I'm wondering if that is anywhere close to how she seemed in the "intended" context.

[As always: Send me asks about everything Sandman-related!]

This is such a good ask, and I feel there are a lot of bases to cover here. Not sure if I’ll do it justice, but here goes…

Disclaimer straightaway: I absolutely detest Thessaly and everything she’s done narratively, and I’m neither a Thessaly-apologist, nor someone who loves her as a character. But I think we need to discuss her with a bit more nuance than I see in lot of fandom spaces.

I think first of all, we need to look at:

Thessaly as a fictional character

As you already pointed out, she naturally has a role in the narrative. I also think parts of her role in said narrative are sometimes a bit misunderstood. One prime example would be the idea she never loved Morpheus. And yes, she absolutely always put herself and her own interests first, so from that angle, she loved herself more than she loved him. That doesn’t mean she never loved him at any point though. Many people quote her saying that she never did as proof that she didn’t. But what people say doesn’t always align with what they feel or do: She says at his wake she swore she’ll never cry over him again—and cries while she’s saying it. That tells us two things: She *did* cry because of him before. And she *does* cry now.

Again, she is a selfish, utterly horrid bitch, but she loved him at some point, and she was mad at him for neglecting her and not paying her enough attention. That’s when it turned sour (and we know how absolutely shit at communicating with women Morpheus is, so they’re both as bad as each other in that regard).

I see her as someone who is totally disconnected/dissociated from her emotions, to the extent that she probably really believes what she says, out of some deep-rooted fear of any kind of vulnerability. Why that is—we can only speculate, because Neil never went into it, hence nothing we assume will ever be canon.

What can be considered canon, however, is that Neil has confirmed the fact that she *did* love him at some point—most notably in the Sandman Companion:

Hy Bender: […] Of course, she’s lying when she says she never loved the Sandman.

Neil Gaiman: Of course; I think that’s made explicit by the final panel, where she says, `I swore I would never shed another tear for him’ while crying. But after he’s won her and then returned to his duties, he wasn’t enough for her anymore. She wanted attention; and when she wasn’t getting it, she said, “Right. We’re done,” and walked out on him.”

I’d also like to point out that the most trans-exclusionary prick in the whole of AGoY is actually George, just that he’s not a woman, and hence, no one ever seems to mention it (he’s actually the one egging Wanda on, not Thessaly). Plus, walking the moon road is maiden, mother and crone to a T, and consciously so. Foxglove is the maiden, Hazel is pregnant, and Thessaly is ancient. So Thessaly’s choice was also based on that, and the only one who Wanda really could have *potentially* replaced would have been Foxglove; she presumably never had penetrative sex, unlike Hazel (in the archaic definition of what penetration means, so we don’t need to argue about lesbian sex practices now). We don’t know that about Wanda, no matter if someone sees her as a man or a woman. I didn’t mean to get that explicit about maiden status, but I guess it *is* important in this context (although yes, of course Thessaly said Wanda is a man, and I’m not arguing that either, but I still think it was grounded in her belief how moon magic works).

Which brings me to a very important point: Thessaly is ancient. Culturally, we can’t compare her to someone who grew up in the 20th century, also with regard to her violent inclinations. She is thousands of years old. She’s seen it all. She has a fierce sense of self-preservation, maybe even rooted in some fears or trauma of her own. All not very nice character traits, no, but that’s not the yardstick, and probably was never supposed to be. I also remember Neil saying he consciously wanted to oppose neopaganism and the watered down, new wave witchcraft of the time (late 1980s/early 1990s, and that, I really remember), which was all about the “divine feminine”, female empowerment, tarot cards and incense sticks. I’m being a bit flippant now, but it isn’t far off. It was more of a trend than anything. He wanted to consciously oppose it with someone who would still act according to ancient, rather violent codes and rules. And Morpheus will have known those, and probably found them less surprising than we do (doesn’t necessarily mean he’d condone them either).

The fact whether Thessaly should make us question Morpheus in the comics is a tricky one. What she definitely *should* make us question is: Morpheus could have quite easily broken some rules in the Kindly Ones when Thessaly had set up the protection circle for Lyta, and the consequences probably would have been less disastrous than playing by said rules. And we can safely presume he knew. We are also supposed to question the same when he lets Nuala call in her boon and doesn’t just say: “This isn’t really a good time, can we do this later?” (and he absolutely COULD have done that), but actually follows through with going ,“Well, what gives, I basically grant you your boon now and leave the Dreaming, even though I know the potential consequences.” So yes, Thessaly is supposed to make us question Dream’s choices, but probably not the way we think. And for that, we perhaps should look deeper into…

Thessaly the TERF and Feminism in the late 1980s/early 1990s

This might get a bit longwinded, and I am showing my age here. I grew up at the intersection of second wave and third wave feminism, and as a bisexual woman, I made a lot of experiences during the early 90s that feel wholly aligned with the plot of AGoY (which was written during that time). I don’t want to write a whole essay about feminism here, but second wave feminism was on its way out in the late 80s. A lot of the bad associations some people have with feminism today stem from that time (not always justified, because a lot of good was achieved during that period. But parts of it in specific sub-communities—definitely problematic). Equality vs equity discussions within the feminist movement were dominating everything, and the divide between radfems and libfems was getting deeper. People like Audre Lorde IMHO rightly criticised that failing to understand that not all women start on equal footing, that not all women are the same, is problematic (so you could easily see how this is incorporated into the narrative of AGoY).

Second wave feminism wasn’t just about making sure women had rights. It was very much about “all of us can do everything men do, and we want the same a man gets”. It was all about the workspace (so often very white, CIS, middle class), not being at home with the kids etc (of course there were also other topics, but this one was really quite dominant). You could even see it fashion (massive shoulder pads etc). All the while, actually *being* a man was vilified (again, just in certain quarters).

So I feel you’re on to something with your #girlboss comment, only that I don’t think it was intentionally set up to like her, but rather as a criticism of what certain quarters of the feminist movement were like at the time.

Personal anecdote: I got that type of schtick from WITHIN the LGBT community at the time. Bi-erasure was big. And there were radfem lesbians that would actually tell you that being bi doesn’t exist, that you are basically a traitor to your “sisters” and just a lesbian who isn’t fully out. The same shite they used to criticise about men who would say you’re only a lesbian because you haven’t found the right guy yet. And here they went, telling you that you can’t be attracted to men if you’re also attracted to women.

Third wave feminism has a much stronger focus on the individual woman and what it means to be a woman to HER. This also included trans women, much more than during the second wave. Judith Butler’s work is actually exemplary for this (in essence, there is no such woman as “the” woman—we’re all different despite sharing common traits and problems. Trying to make us all the same will only harm us in the long run).

And with AGoY and Thessaly, we are exactly at the moment in time (in the comics) where that shift happens. I think Neil got it right for the time, and understood a lot of what was going on. Many people in queer communities felt really understood and seen, myself included. I absolutely see how that translates differently today. But it always saddens me when the historical context gets completely stripped away, and people don’t take the time a work of fiction was written into consideration and only measure it from today’s viewpoint. We can, and absolutely have to be critical if the TV shows fails to address these points and just translates everything 1-2-1. Which I am fairly certain won’t happen, because Thessaly has already been stripped off a lot of her obvious TERFiness in the Audible. I’m not even sure if we’ll get her in the show—we’ll hopefully find out.

Phew, that was long, I’m gonna lie down 😂

[staycalmandhugaclone]

You'll Have to Go Through Me Pt 5

Part 5 of You'll Have to Go Through Me, the next arc of Doc's Misadventures! If you're new, start at the beginning with Touch Starved!

It's come to my attention that my previous attempts at tagging through this arc were wildly unsuccessful. Here's to hoping it works this way, but, for those of you who are just learning about this arc, at least you have plenty to enjoy! (my bad, guys)

Warnings: Nightmares, guilt, reference to torture/gore, reference to murder/assassination, profanity

WC: 4,150

Waking from sedation isn’t the same as waking from sleep. There’s a long moment in which your body is awake – you can see and hear and recognize the world around you, but you aren’t really there. I felt the rumble of subtle snores vibrating against my cheek as I stared blindly toward the empty bunks across from us without granting them a moment’s thought as to why they were empty, vaguely noting how Wrecker held me tightly to his chest with his back resting against the rear wall of his bunk, that his head had tilted forward so his lips still just touched my temple.

My entire body shifted with each lazy rise and fall of his deep breaths as I listened to a distant, rhythmic hum that sounded nothing like the Marauder’s engine, and I remembered counting him through slowing his breaths, willing some trace of calm into him. That felt like months ago… maybe it had been months…

Thoughts drifted through my mind absent intent as that memory led to the first time I’d guided him through that simple exercise in the hopes of lulling him into a quiet that would let me work the tension from his muscles. I thought about those precious seconds that eased Hunter from that agony tearing through his head and the tears Echo shed in the quiet isolation of the storage room as he felt touch offered for the simple comfort it could bring void of expectation or necessity. I remembered how Tech had needed his datapad to distract himself initially, but then grew so relaxed that he managed to fall asleep in my arms. I remembered the note of surprise breaking through Crosshair’s rage as I pushed the inflammation from his injured hand, how long it had taken for him to finally begin relaxing into that gentle trance as I worked over each knuckle…

The sickening pop of wrenching those fingers from their sockets.

My chest jerked with a tiny gasp, eyes going wide as my body tensed, forcefully swallowing back the sudden rush of nausea from that wretched memory. I tried to keep myself still, reluctant to risk jarring the man behind me from his sleep even as the violent surge of panic left me shaking. He hadn’t noticed yet, unhurried breaths still dancing lazily through him.

Movements carefully mediated, I guided first one massive arm away from me, and then the other before slowly easing myself to my feet, tense sigh flowing past pursed lips upon finding no signs that Wrecker had noticed. I didn’t know how to feel upon waking in his arms, nor was I prepared yet to discuss why I’d needed such comfort at all, still mortified that, of all the members of the squad, it had been him to see the monstrous scene left in the wake of my desperation. That was something I couldn’t avoid for long, but I was eager to delay it for at least a short while more.

The ship was unnaturally still, and it didn’t take long to realize that the distant humming was ocean waves rather than the Marauder’s engines. I tread quietly toward the medbay to confirm that Echo was also gone, and dread pierced my chest. Had he been awake last night? Did he hear what I’d said? Maker, I hoped not… I didn’t want to risk him feeling even a whisper of guilt over what I’d done to save him…

Moving quickly passed Wrecker once more, I ducked into the main cabin and was surprised to note that most of the others’ armor had been left behind. Hunter and Tech had taken only their lower gear, while Echo didn’t bother even with that. Crosshair, however, took not only his full kit of armor, but his rifle as well…

Beyond the open ramp lay a blanket of tawny sand dappled beneath flickering shadows of palms dancing overhead. I could feel the ocean breeze, could taste the salt weighing down the damp air, and I wanted to let myself imagine what it might be like to be granted the freedom to enjoy the paradise awaiting me just outside the metal walls, to relish its beauty in the company of this incredible family free of impending horrors and inescapable regret that clung to every impossible step forward in this wretched war.

I wanted to hear Wrecker’s laugh and savor Hunter’s smile. I wanted to listen to the wonder in Tech’s voice as he spoke of the intricate secrets hidden beneath the waves. I wanted Echo to enjoy the warmth of the sun’s light. I wanted to watch Crosshair nap in the shade without fear of what dangers might lurk within the trees. As I began walking down that ramp, however, I knew I’d find none of those precious moments awaiting me in the deceptive beauty of this hidden land.

The crystalline sands were just hot enough to nearly burn my bare feet as I sunk a few inches in just that first step. Impatiently, I reached down to pull up the fabric about my ankles so the abrasive grit wouldn’t get trapped between the cloth and my skin but found myself wincing at the attempt to use my right hand. My jaw tensed at the memory of why that pain emphasized even subtle movements, and I forced myself to finish the task regardless, almost spiteful of the way that memory made my heart twist within my chest.

Arms wrapping around my waist, I glanced down to look over the collection of footsteps disturbing the wind-kissed grounds. While there was a clear trail leading away from the distant roar of waves, the path going slightly downhill was far more heavily traveled. Gently sloping dunes dusted with tall grasses that swayed elegantly in the winds obscured the ocean I found myself repeatedly assuming to be just over the next ridge, but it was several minutes before I saw anything beyond the picturesque landscape.

The instant we saw each other, Hunter went just as stiff as I did, wide eyes carefully studying me as though he’d come across some feral animal rather than the friend who’d held him when his headaches got bad, the squad member who’d spilt blood and tears to keep them safe, and a cruel whisper churned like poison in the back of my mind that maybe he was right to find himself so on edge around me.

He'd just crested a rather steep hill, wind lashing his hair about his face as he stared down at me, and I couldn’t help but loath the knowledge of what he was looking for, brows furrowing slightly as my hands tightened against the urge to turn and run, to flee before I could see those eyes tainted with pity or disgust from what I’d done, from what had done to me.

“Are… are you…” The words fell from his lips in an almost nervous whisper, and I found myself rebelling from the concern in his voice. I think I wanted him to be repelled by me, to justify my own self-revulsion even as I still couldn’t bring myself to regret it.

“Awake?” I offered in a mockery of the teasing lilt I once used so freely with him, and quickly looked away upon hearing how broken it sounded. “Yeah.” I added shortly. I wasn’t sure what I expected. Would we fall back into that rage-filled tension? Would he awkwardly strain for a gentleness that would never feel natural between us again? Or would he merely continue on silently as though neither of us had spoken at all?

When the hiss of falling sand voiced rushed movement before me, I looked up in surprise to find him quickly moving forward, heedless of how he stumbled and slid as the shifting ground latched around his feet with every step down the abrupt edge of the dune. There was no reservation to the urgency of his strides nor the heartbreak twisting his handsome face, and I couldn’t begin to react before his arms locked around me, wrenching me against his chest with a desperation that left me stunned.

“I’m sorry.” He pressed the strained words into my hair. “I…” A sharp breath escaped him in something too near a sob. “I’m sorry.” Finally, I remembered how to move, how to think as a relief so consuming it nearly broke me anew burst through my chest in a flurry of heat that sent tears clawing up my throat.

“It wasn’t your fault.” I whispered, tilting to press my cheek to his, lips nearly brushing against his ear. “What happened… It was a trap, Hunter. Nothing would have changed if I’d been with him from the start.” He shook his head, breath catching to voice some argument, but I didn’t wait for him to explain. Those soldiers had entered that room ready for a fight. If I’d been there, I probably would have been killed long before anyone even knew what was happening. Taking them by surprise was likely the only reason I’d been able to rescue Echo. “It wasn’t your fault.”

My hands slowly reached out, touch hesitant at first as it slipped over the nearly trembling muscles locked taut along the length of his back, his shoulders, before finally letting my fingers tangle into his hair, clinging to him with the full brunt of a need I’d forced myself to deny, that I’d buried and crushed beneath anger and fear and any other emotion that might let me hide from the agony of thinking I’d lost him forever, and he held me even tighter because of it. Still, I didn’t want him hurting beneath a guilt he didn’t deserve.

His shoulders crept forward, breath steadily losing its fleeting grasp of stability until he finally let his head fall, face nestling against my neck, and I wondered if he was listening to the too-quick beating of my heart, if he could smell the unshed tears burning my eyes. For a long while, he merely held me, and I shamelessly relished every passing second, fingers absently tracing meaningless lines atop his scalp.

“I shouldn’t have pushed you away like that.” When those hushed words fluttered over the sensitive skin just beneath my jaw, I couldn’t help but shiver as gooseflesh danced down my arms. Letting out a slow sigh, I shifted to press my lips to his brow.

“I think we both made some mistakes.” I murmured against him. “I shouldn’t have run off the instant we got to Kamino… and I shouldn’t have ignored your messages.” He let out a small scoff.

“Not like we were being very understanding of things.” He offered quietly, and a small chuckle shook through me.

“Probably should have done a better job breaking the news.” Hunter shook his head and, taking a final, deep breath, stepped back. I didn’t want to let him go, teeth quickly catching about my lip to force my arms back to my sides.

“It’s…” He glanced briefly away from me as he thought over his words. “It’s going to be hard… getting used to this.” He explained in something that almost sounded like a question, and I so nearly reached out for him all over again at the sorrow bleeding through the apology in his eyes. “But Wrecker’s right… you both deserve whatever happiness you can find.” I swallowed back the fresh surge of tears, swallowed back the words vying to be shouted from my lips telling him that he deserved that happiness, too… but that risked touching something I couldn’t let myself acknowledge, and I had to turn away from him to steel myself against the agony of forcing those thoughts into silence once more.

“Are… are Tech and Echo…” I started, both desperate for and loathing the need to offer us both some distraction.

“Yeah,” He murmured with the same resigned acceptable I felt sinking through my chest like ice. “They’re both on the beach.” He didn’t meet my eyes as he nodded over his shoulder, tongue absently slipping over his lips. “Tech’s been checking over Echo’s cybernetics practically since he woke up – hasn’t found any issues yet.” That, at least, granted me a relief I felt no need to hide, shoulders sinking in a rushed exhale.

“Good.” I breathed, but, when he offered nothing more, I couldn’t keep the note of guilt from my voice, “And…?” Still, I couldn’t bring myself to say his name, not when even that felt like it might rekindle the horrid tension between us, but Hunter didn’t hesitate.

“Cross went off on his own.” He looked past me, and I thought of the second trail that led away from the sound of crashing waves.

“‘Went off on his own’ to mope or to keep from shouting at everyone?” I asked, and my heart leapt at the earnest laugh that drew his lips into a grin.

“Might have been a bit of both.” There was a warning and an apology in those words, and I readily returned his smile with one of my own.

“Well, I’m either going to make it better or much, much worse.” I sighed. “Wish me luck.” Smirking, he reached out to let his hand trail down my hair before pulling away to let me leave.

“Hunter.” I called, freezing in my tracks after barely a handful of strides. He said nothing as I glanced back toward him, attention focused on me with that familiar attentiveness as he heard the sudden dread in my voice. “Don’t…” I started, stumbling over the effort to force myself to speak, to remember that fight and the nightmares it brought, “Don’t tell Echo…” His shoulders sank with understanding before giving a small nod, and I was so violently grateful that I didn’t have to explain what I meant. I didn’t want Echo to know what I’d done, nor how those actions had broken me, and I didn’t doubt that Hunter knew exactly why I was so eager to keep that knowledge from him.

“Thank you.” I whispered before continuing once more back toward the Marauder.

Wrecker’s snores still hummed steadily from within those metal walls as I continued past the ship deeper into the tropical forest garnishing the heart of the island. Brightly colored wings flashed between the dancing fronds, fleeing my presence with a chorus of offended cries. The air felt heavier the further I walked from the oceans, that luxurious breeze stifled by the trees, trapping the damp heat within their dancing canopy. Even the taste of salt faded beneath the oppressive humidity. This far from the beach, the sands steadily morphed into something more akin to soil, but I was still able to follow those tracks with little difficulty.

He didn’t move when I finally found him. His rifle lay forgotten at his feet, arms locked tightly across his chest as he leaned back against one of the swaying palms, body hidden by that darkened armor. Drawing a steadying breath, I stepped quietly toward him. Still, he wouldn’t look at me even as I leaned against that same tree, purposefully letting my shoulder gently bump against his.

“I’m sorry if I worried you.” I whispered, eyes turned blindly away from him. A silence hung between us, pressing me to say something more. “But I had to do it.” I continued, throat shifting uncomfortably over words I was still trying to force myself to believe. “We would have lost Echo if I hadn’t.”

“I didn’t know how to help you.” My gaze darted toward him, caught off-guard by the depth of remorse in those words he barely let himself whisper. The lower ridge of his helmet clicked against his chest plate, and I didn’t need to see him to know exactly how the muscles locked about his jaw, teeth grinding beneath the effort to force his voice steady. “You were…” His mic caught the slow breath he forced himself to release before he continued. “I had no karking idea what I was supposed to do.” His armor creaked from how tightly his hands clenched around his arms.

I wasn’t expected that. I’d half feared he was mad that Wrecker had comforted me through the night instead of him, or frustrated that I’d placed myself in such a dangerous position to save Echo… but this…

Movements hesitant, waiting for any sign of refusal, I stepped in front of him, hands tentatively reaching for his helm, but he made no effort to evade me as I gently eased it free. His brows were furrowed sharply above eyes glaring at the dirt beneath our feet. I set that delicately calibrated bucket down before reaching for him, hands whispering softly up the sharp line of his jaw as my thumbs danced lightly atop his cheeks.

“You did help me.” I murmured, but his frown only deepened. “You took care of me… You may not think that was important, but it was.” His shoulder tensed, and I could see the dismissal just pulling his lips into the beginnings of a scowl.

“Didn’t do a damn thing to keep you from breaking down last night.” He retorted, disdain dripping from every word.

“Yeah…” I breathed, that familiar guilt rekindling through my chest. “But there was nothing you could have done to stop that, Crosshair.” His scowl only deepened.

“Didn’t take Wrecker long to figure out how to help you.” That’s what I was expecting; the way he nearly snarled his brother’s name despite how clearly his anger was directed only toward himself.

“I didn’t come all the way out here looking for Wrecker.” I whispered, hands stilling against him in a silent plea, and I nearly sobbed when his eyes reluctantly met mine. I’d never seen him so full of doubt.

“I tortured him.” I whispered suddenly, and I told myself it was to break him free of the self-deprecating thoughts that tormented him, to rend myself open and reveal that raw, festering truth both as distraction and to alleviate those whispers of inferiority. This was something I hadn’t told his brothers, wouldn’t tell his brothers, and, as his attention darted fully to me, I knew he understood that.

“I broke his elbow so he couldn’t fight… and then I hit him… I hit him until he could barely speak…” My voice sounded… hollow, lips still frozen in that earlier smile though I was certain it looked wrong beneath the emptiness of my eyes. “Echo was trapped. I couldn’t get his scomp out of the terminal… He wouldn’t tell me how to get him out… so I broke his fingers… and then I shot them off.” There was an edge of horror darkening that gorgeous amber. He wasn’t horrified by what I’d done, but I wanted him to be. I wanted him to berate me for my monstrous actions so I wouldn’t be alone in my disgust, but I knew his horror was only for the way my own words ruined me.

“I broke him… and I got Echo free…” My voice dropped into a hoarse whisper, tears I’d barely noticed clawing up my throat finally slipping down my cheeks as I added, “And I killed him.”

Crosshair’s shoulders rocked beneath too-quick breaths, brows drawn together sharply enough to form a deep crease between them. My hands belatedly pulled away from him to return aimlessly to my sides.

“He’d already given up.” I whispered. “I’m a medic.” Finally, my voice broke. “I only wanted to help people.” His throat shifted stiffly, lips parting but unable to bring himself to speak. “The way he screamed…” My faltering breaths robbed those words of their clarity, but he understood, and whatever spell had held him still broke as his arms darted around me, clutching me against him for mere seconds before his hands frantically reached up to cradle my head, fingers burying themselves into my hair. His forehead pressed almost painfully against mine as he fought to steady himself before pulling back just enough to meet my gaze.

“Damn it.” The growled curse hissed through gritted teeth. “You should never have had to do that…” I stood unmoving before him, frozen by the rage in his voice despite knowing it wasn’t meant for me. “But you didn’t do a damn thing wrong!” He nearly snarled, straining to keep himself under control.

“I took an oath, Cross… and I-”

“Yeah, and I shot your damn brother, but you don’t blame me for it!” He snapped suddenly. The silence that followed forbade either of us from moving, from breathing. Neither had brought it up since that night. Whether that was because time simply hadn’t allowed it or due to some unspoken fear of what might happen if we breached that silence, I couldn’t bring myself to say, but he couldn’t take back those words regardless the regret that washed through him. They hung between us like poison; bombs waiting to see who might trigger the first explosion.

“That was different.” I listened to that vain effort to fight back the tension between us before even realizing I’d begun to speak.

“The only difference,” he argued quietly, “is that you knew why you were doing it… You knew that it would make a difference – that it would let you get Echo out of there.” That wretched darkness tainted the brilliant gold dancing through his eyes, and I wanted to sob at the sight of it. I remembered the emptiness he’d hid behind to mask the sorrow in his voice when he’d told me that it wasn’t his choice to become a sniper, that the choice was forced upon him purely due to the nature of his mutations.

“The only reason I had to pull that trigger… were orders from someone I’ve never met.” His hands fell away from me, and I had to fight to keep from reaching up in a desperate plea to keep him from pulling away.

“You’re right.” I said, almost shocked to hear the anger suddenly fueling my voice. His eyes widened in surprise before that heartbreaking resignation stole over him, as though he’d been awaiting this for days. “You had the choice to either follow that order or be chastised for failure. You had the choice to kill a soldier of the enemy army or risk whatever kriffed up punishment those damn long-necks have waiting for soldiers who refuse to thoughtlessly obey.”

Each word grew sharper, louder, emboldened with a rage all my own that he was placed into that position at all, and I was suddenly struck by the realization that we’d both been forced by circumstances beyond our control; that he was right in comparing how effortlessly I blamed myself with how adamantly I refused to blame him. That realization must have shown through in my expression because his eyes refocused intently on me.

I drew a slow, deep breath, gaze softening as I looked up at him. Without a word, I stepped forward and wrapped my arms around him. He paused for only a beat before returning the embrace, hands slipping lightly over my shoulders.

“Thank you.” I breathed, and his touch instantly lost all hesitation. One hand slipped up my neck to again let his fingers tangle through my hair while the other wrapped around my lower back, locking me against him, the edges of his armor pressing unapologetically into me. “I really hate your armor sometimes.” I mumbled. He was quiet for a moment longer before letting a breathy chuckle escape him, and my heart leapt at the sound as he leaned over me.

“Can’t make it that easy for you to get me undressed.” He teased, lips dancing lightly atop my forehead.

“I haven’t gotten you undressed yet.” I reminded almost petulantly, brow hitching as I shifted just enough to glance up at him. He returned my glare with a quiet smirk that sent warmth fluttering through my chest.

The shrill chime of an incoming message drew a short sigh from him, attention reluctantly falling to his comm.

“Hunter’s asking if you found me. I’m tempted to say ‘no’, but apparently, he wants me to bring you back for lunch.” He droned in feigned annoyance, and I found myself biting back the threat of laughter as he tucked the comm away without replying. “Come on.” He muttered, stepping away to grab his rifle and helmet before looping his arm around my waist. “If we wait too long, he’ll come hunt us down himself.”

“Cross?” I called hesitantly after we’d begun walking back. His gaze shifted toward me, but I didn’t turn from the path stretching out before us. “Don’t tell Echo what I did.” I whispered the plea before glancing only briefly at him. His thumb brushed against my hip, fingers tightening so gently around me, I almost missed the comforting gesture as he continued forward in silence, but I didn’t doubt he understood.

Next Chapter

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[dozhdevik]

My thoughts on chapter 418 and 419.

In fact, the first part of this post was written by me long before the spoilers of chapter 419, but it simply was not published. I think it's time to share my opinion.

I saw a post a while ago in which a person complained about some annoying anonymous people who claimed that AFO was nothing more than evil in the flesh and that he had no feelings. This inspired me to write a post about this because I strongly disagree with this opinion.

While this is not a surprise given the AFO flashback chapters, I think people shouldn't take the Narrator's words in these chapters at face value because All for One is the most unreliable narrator I've ever seen. The same Tomura in chapter 418 experiences an identity crisis, because for the first time he began to realize that he was not created for destruction. You can watch the end of chapter 237 where Shigaraki comes to the conclusion that the reason he killed his family was because he really wanted to do it, but that's NOT the case.

This is what AFO convinced him of, repeating over and over again that Shigaraki was born to destroy.

This is what AFO meant when he said in Chapter 418 that Tomura had never made a single independent decision in his entire life: because AFO had brainwashed Tenko so much that even when AFO wasn't there to show him the way, Tomura continued to think that way in a way that supported the ideas of destruction that AFO wanted from him.

At the same time, All for One constantly denies that he has any human feelings or emotions, to the point of convincing himself that the tears he shed in front of Kudo were a tool of manipulation, although this makes no sense. I was always convinced that AFO, no matter how much he pretended to be an emotionless monster, always felt heartache over the loss of Yoichi.

Now that the spoilers for chapter 419 have been released, despite my overall shock at what happened in this chapter (I really didn't expect Izuku to lose his arms, even if there were signs for it), my opinion hasn't changed much. While I have to admit that I couldn't have foreseen the extent to which AFO interfered in Tenko's life (to the point where AFO encouraged Kotaro to have a second child), it did confirm what I wanted to write about Chapter 418. AFO controlled every aspect of Shigaraki's life, right down to his thoughts, without Tomura realizing it.

At the same time, I think chapter 419 also confirmed that AFO was an unreliable narrator in chapters 407-408, and that he actually has feelings, despite how much of a monster AFO presented himself as in those two chapters. If you pay attention to AFO's eyes when he took over Tomura's body in Chapter 419, you can see how AFO is devastated.

Despite AFO defeating Shigaraki's will, he does not feel triumphant. He doesn't seem to care about his victory. And the reason for this is quite simple: he lost Yoichi. AFO has lost his little brother, and now all he can do is return to his main plan to take over the world. Although without Yoichi it doesn't mean as much to him now.

[houseforwhores]

indecision pt 3 | billy loomis x reader

a/n: yeah yeah it's been awhile life sucks not much to say about that, i'm trying here 🫡

wc:885

part 1 part 2

your p.o.v.

you were sitting in the edge of your bed, it was only four in the morning. you had another seven hours before you were supposed to go meet billy. your stomach was twisting in knots as you tried to calm your nerves. sleep has long evaded you. you weren't sure how all of this would work out. but it was too late for regrets now in your mind.

you heard your window being shimmied, you'd rushed over, your eyes nearly buldging out of your sockets as you saw who was in the other side of the glass. you unlocked your window and pushed it open wide so he could get in, he must've changed his clothes somewhere along the way. his new clothes free of corn-syrup and blood. you yanked him inside, he fell on top of you again, much like a few days ago, you cushioned his fall.

you rolled him off top of yourself, before you stuck your head out the window looking both ways before quickly shutting it and drawing the blinds together. you didn't see anyone watching but you were a bit paranoid at the feeling of someone seeing him here.

"billy." you'd said softly almost as if you didn't believe he was here.

"hey doll, god, i've missed you." billy's hand caressed the side of your face pulling you back down to him.

"billy. what are you doing here? what if they've seen you?" your mind losing its filter as your mouth began running like a waterfall every scenario you could think up leaving your tongue before billy pulled you into a kiss, his tongue gliding against your bottom lip asking for entrance which you granted him, his tongue whirled against yours as his hands embraced your waist making all your worries melt at the moment. billy pulled away softly before looking you in your eyes.

"something felt off, i couldn't wait that much longer to see you," billy said wiping the stray tear from beneath your eye, you didn't even know you'd shed.

"billy they wanted me to set you up, they think they're gonna apprehend you in the morning, behind the theater."

"that's where we were supposed to go for our first date," billy paused a small smile gracing his face. "then i decided to take you to that little italian restaurant."

"giovanni's." you confirmed "why'd you come here? what if they're watching me?"

"i hopped a few fences i didn't use the side walk, i think i'm good here." billy said he started to sit up, he looked to still be a little sore, you lifted up his shirt to get a glimpse of the injuries you didn't get to see when he'd initially came to get you. you'd seen some jagged stitches and some yellowing bruises, but it looked like he'd survive, just a few flesh wounds.

"im alright baby, i think we sh-" billy was cutoff by a knock on your door.

"hun? who ya talking too in there?" your dad started to fiddle with the handle

"not dressed!" you shouted before bolting to the door, almost planting face first into the wood as you used your whole body to close the door, while you locked it.

"oh , sorry honey! are you alright? i thought i heard you talking in there to someone?"

"it was just some lame movie dad, now can i have some privacy?" you said more confidently

"ohm, alright. i'm here if you need me honey, i know you don't exactly like me right now- but i- i'm still your father. i still love you." your dad said, he hadn't left the door you could still feel his presence and see the shadow of his feet at the bottom of the door, blocking the hallway light, he must've been waiting for a response.

"yeah, love you too, see you in the morning." you'd rushed out. you saw his feet walk away from the door, you waited a bit more before you decided to relax.

"i think we should go now." billy said and before you knew it you heard gravel crushing the rocks outside as a car pulled in front of your house.

"wait, billy, someone's here." you heard the knock on your door, you listened as your father walked to open the door. you heard the series of locks being taken off the door before your father opened it, your ear was pressed to the door. the words were muffled but you heard them clearly enough

"agent grant? what are you doing here?" you heard your father question. your mouth dropped open as your throat went dry.

"billy!" you whisper shouted as you dashed across your room to grab the bag you packed, you tossed it to him so you could began dressing yourself into something warmer.

"y/n what's going on?" billy asked in a whisper throwing the straps of the bag over his shoulders.

"no time to talk." you said as you began sliding your window open but before you could scatter out your window there was a knock on your door

"y/n" it was your dad again, he'd paused for a moment giving you time to respond, though you hadn't thought of a response. "agent grant is here, he'd like to talk to you."

[neuroprincess]

Abbott Elementary - Having a baby with Melissa Schemmenti (Headcanon)

Melissa Schemmenti/Female Reader

Classification: Fluff

Warnings: None

Word count: +1600

Part One | Part Two

- She is scared to death of the idea of being a mother, first of all that it's something she put off all those years married to Joe because she knows it's a big responsibility she's not ready for, and second that Melissa thinks she's too old to have a baby. When you bring up the subject she immediately denies and laughs nervously, putting her cards on the table being sincere, you understood and respected her;

- But nothing is the same after that conversation, the famous "baby fever" happens and all she sees are babies, dozens and dozens of chubby babies, full of hair, gaping smiles and sweet eyes. And then her cousin had a daughter, Sofia, a baby who is obsessed with you and won't leave your lap at family reunions, in those moments she catches herself imagining how a baby of the two of you would look like. She always imagines a chubby baby with rosy cheeks, olive eyes, and a Schemmenti appetite;

- And it's at one of these reunions that she decides to give the possibility of having children a chance even at 50, you are cradling Sofia in the bedroom when she enters, with a plate of lasagna in hand and a rehearsed speech in mind, but when the teacher sees the scene she softens completely forgetting any words she has rehearsed. "I think I want one." She whispers sitting next to you on the bed, absorbed in the beauty of the scenery, pushing her own insecurities into the background and imagining a shared future;

- When you start talking about the possibilities, she tells you that she knows a guy and soon realizes the equivocation, retracting it by saying that she knows a guy who owns a fertility clinic and owes her a favor. After a few consultations you opt for artificial insemination and spend weeks choosing a donor, Melissa thinks it's stressful at first, but soon gets excited, especially when she and Barbara start ranking the "ugliest men no one would choose". After almost a month you find the perfect man, Italian family, green eyes, red hair, law degree, in appearance almost a male version of your wife;

- The first attempt is frustrated, there were six negative tests thrown away and a sensitive redhead for days, she is impatient and can't wait to work. The team finds her behavior awkward, and you fend off curious colleagues, choosing to hide from them and everyone else that you are trying to get pregnant, except Barb. The second attempt filled you with hope with a false positive from the pharmacy test and that was snatched away from you with the blood test, Melissa left the clinic silent and on the way home asked if you still want to go through this, the hormones, consultations, procedures and the disappointment. And it's not as if you can continue to pay for so many attempts on a teacher's salary. You say you feel equally frustrated, but want to give it one last chance and that you can turn to adoption;

- As some say, the third time is the lucky one. One trimester after the second attempt you decide to give insemination one last chance and, not wanting to give your already frustrated wife hope, you decide to do the test alone when suspicious. Almost a dozen positive pharmaceutical tests and one blood test confirm what you both hoped and wished for. A Schemmenti baby on the way;

- The reveal is simple but symbolic, you order an apron with the words "Mommy Schemmenti" embroidered on it. Melissa weirds out the random gift, especially since she hardly ever wears an apron for cooking, so she makes a sexual joke, teasing about a new kink she's heard about and whether this is an invitation for you two to try it. When you tell her that the two of you will be Schemmenti mommies she finally understands and can't help but shed tears of happiness, lovingly hugging and kissing you for the rest of the night, thanking you for bringing your child into the world;

- You decide to keep the pregnancy a secret, at least during the first trimester because it is the most delicate and intimate, the teacher is a fierce, loving and protective mother. The first weeks were physically exhausting, all those nausea, excessive trips to the bathroom, the fatigue and vomiting, the last one was the worst part, the baby apparently rejects any food that is not salad and yogurt. Melissa seems almost offended when you run to vomit after eating pasta a carbonara and questions the Italian origin of the donor while rubbing your back in front of the toilet;

- This woman has always had a hand on you, whether it's over the table at a dining table, the hand on your thigh at work meetings, on your back while you're leaving Abbott, etc. But since the discovery of your pregnancy this has become more than frequent, she simply won't leave your side, accompanies you everywhere you go and to all your appointments (she has even considered combining your two classes in just to be with you), takes care of your every need and desire. Do you want a weird milkshake in the middle of the night? She'll do it. Do you feel pain in your back or feet during class? Melissa will give you a massage at lunchtime. Did someone bother you? She will already be taking out her earrings to make that person cry;

- And that's how everyone finds out you're pregnant, you've just reached your second trimester and the baby has started to show, a visible lump that you hide with clothes. But Janine broke the air conditioner, again, and you had to take off the extra layer, which caught Ava's attention, the woman commented that you have put on weight and said she would send you a tik tok of a diet that is making success, Melissa doesn't lose your look of pain knowing how much you are struggling with the physical changes and self esteem. "She's not fat, she's carrying my baby, idiot!" your wife raises her voice and stands up, already taking off the earrings, ready to attack but you stop her;

- The team is simply delighted with the news, the next day they show up with gifts (among them an Eagles bodysuit and another written "Philly, No one like us. We don't care.”, brownies and Ava starts a bet about the baby's gender behind your back, Melissa secretly enters the bet, she is sure that the baby will be a boy. Earlier the redhead wanted to find out almost immediately, so you were weirded out when she suggested a cliché baby shower reveal and insisted it be at the school. Obviously Barbara was in responsible, the only one who wouldn't open her mouth to anyone and so it was, you found out only when the slice was removed from the cake, revealing a dark blue. She, Janine and Gregory won the bet;

- The Schemmenti's don't exactly know how to react or what to say with the news, the siblings and cousins soon show excitement, always waiting for the moment when Melissa would bring additions to the family and a cousin to their children. Her parents seem more skeptical, they have seen their daughter have her heart broken and everything seems so fast with you compared to her previous relationships, deep down they are just afraid that she will over indulge and get hurt again, but they quickly get excited about the arrival of the new grandchild, her mother shows you all the embarrassing photo albums, told you about how Melissa was as a kid and gave you tips, you come home with copies of photos of your wife as a child and a happy heart knowing how lucky your child is;

- She likes to call the baby "Tesoro (Treasure)" and "Amore mio (my love)", Melissa has the habit of talking to your belly, the boy is very agitated by the presence of the other mother, but is also easily calmed down by her voice and affectionate nicknames. If he won't let you sleep, your wife will read children's books. If he is agitated while you are teaching, she will lecture the little Schemmenti, which he seems to understand and won't kick your internal organs for the rest of the day. Before bed is her favorite time to talk to your son, Melissa likes to have deep conversations with the child while you fall asleep, admiring their interaction;

- Although it doesn't seem so, she is still scared to death to be a mother, but ready and willing to do her best for your son. Sometimes insecurities surface and Melissa soon goes looking for advice, usually from Barbara, the first grade teacher reassuring her about motherhood and always giving affirmations about how she will be a great mother, the kids love her and so does the bambino, and he hasn't even been born yet;

- When your waters break a month earlier than expected, the usually composed and rational Melissa gives way to a terrified and crazed mother, running around before putting you in the car and making at least three tickets on the way to the hospital. She doesn't leave your side at any time, except when you ask for something, and she holds your hand through the six hours of labor, not caring about the painful squeeze and the swear words directed at her, the redhead knows it's not easy and all worth in the end, when you hear that loud cry that sounds like music to your ears;

- Melissa is the first to hold him and suddenly she finds herself very vunerable, the teacher can't help but shed tears as she stares at your little angel curled up in her arms, fragile and lovely, so perfect as you once imagined, with coppery hair, olive eyes, chubby cheeks and a killer smile, moody like his mother, a perfect little Schemmenti.

Schemmenti Family Masterlist