#Can Allah bring someone

[islamicspecialistforloveback]

Wazifa For One-Sided Love

Wazifa for one-sided love is very perfect for you. This medicine will work very well to match you with your loved one or a special one. It will affect your one-sided love, which will soon be your complete love or both-sided love after its impact on Wazifa For One-Sided Love. The deeper the one-sided love, the deeper its pain. As we all know love is a very beautiful flower in this colorful…

[runawaycarouselhorse]

Me, looking at the new wave, having never stopped wearing masks outside: huh.

[shellsandsalt]

What really hurts about religious discourse is how much we all have in common. I know being a Hellenist brings me unfathomable levels of warmth and comfort that I can’t find anywhere else. And I know there are people of other faiths that feel that way with their deities.

There’s so much emphasis on who is “right” or “wrong”, but I don’t believe there’s one truth for everyone. We all have such different lives and paths. The way religion is used as a weapon of hate and not a tool for love and compassion will always sadden me.

I may not personally worship every deity of every religion, but I acknowledge that the feeling of spiritual fulfillment that other religions give people is real. That is enough for me to find love in my heart for them all.

If Allah can bring you that feeling, THATS BEAUTIFUL!! If Jesus can bring you that feeling, THATS BEAUTIFUL!! If any deity of any faith can bring you that feeling….THATS BEAUTIFUL!!!!

Personally, I don’t see my religion as an undeniable truth for everyone. I see it as spiritual connection that brings me love and warmth like no other. I know Lady Aphrodite is real in my heart, because I feel her. I can never give you an equation or a fact that proves my feelings, but I know it’s true in my life. How could you look someone in the eyes and tell them they’ll be punished for seeking love and warmth?

I know I’m just rambling, but I just wish we could live in a world where religion wasn’t a competition of who is right, but a way for us to find more beauty and fulfillment in our worlds.

[yeosbbm]

Cowabunga

Smut | MDNI

starring: surfer! yunho x lifeguard! fem reader

genre: mutuals to lovers, perfect match

summary: being a lifeguard is fun since you get paid just to keep the peace and keep people from drowning. it does get boring however…that’s until you saved yunho from drowning while surfing and he repays you back with a small date and more...

warnings: size kink, sweet/dirty talk, indirect exhibitionism (you don’t get caught/nobody around), oral (fem+masc received), fingering, unprotected piv

A/n: This shit took forever to write so if it flops then oh well I’ll just delete it allah please.

The sun is beaming and the cobalt ocean sways and rolls into itself. Today was a good day to be a lifeguard. A lovely view paired with rarely having to get down from your chair tower.

The most you have to do is yell “No trash thrown into the sand please!” Or “No fighting!” every now and again. A person hasn’t had trouble in the water except for once or twice.

It’s a calm low effort job. BUT, you really do wish it was more exciting, there’s only so many sunsets you can watch and shaved icees you can eat.

During your silent contemplation you feel someone knock and bump your lifeguard tower. While getting ready to curse you notice it was just Mingi and the others.

“Hey ! (y/n) .” Mingi says while lightly knocking on your tower. “Min. PLEASE. Stop knocking the tower.” You say pinching the bridge of your nose.

“We told him not to.” Wooyoung and San say in unison.

“You dropped your whistle by the way.” Seonghwa chimes.

You sigh while coming down from your tower. You look around for the “dropped whistle” but still don’t see it in the sand. “Where’s the whistle.” Mingi points and shows it was still around your neck.

“We just wanted you to come down since you haven’t left the tower all day.” Mingi chuckles. You want to be mad but you were a bit hungry and aforementioned bored out of your mind.

“The Tiki Cafe ?” You ask squinting from the sun’s brightness.

Mingi nods “Yeaa Tiki Cafe, gotta meet with Yunho anyway.”

You all head over to it. It’s a small cafe most people at the beach or locals go to. You all order your usuals and begin to talk and eat.

In the midst of a conversation Mingi looks over at the door and smiles. “YUNHO !! Over here !” He whisper shouts. Yunho walks over to the table and leans over onto it with his board.

He greets the other guys and nods his head at you. Yunho is Mingi’s closest friend as well as a known surfer. Him and Mingi surf together all the time. You two have spoken before and follow each others instas but your convos stay short and casual.

You can’t lie. This man is beautiful. His tall toned body paired with his perfectly set face, the cheesy smile and sweet boyish charm. You most definitely found him attractive.

You bring yourself out your staring when you notice a large crack running down Yunhos surfboard. “Wait what happened to your board.”

“Yikes man, what DID happen.” Mingi says grasping the nose of the board to ogle at the crack.

Yunho looks down at it and gives a shy smile. Gosh he’s handsome. “Dropped it on the asphalt. It should be fine..I’m still heading to catch the big wave today.”

“Really ? You sure your board will be able to stay up ?” You’re not exactly a surfer yourself but you know that cracks can be detrimental.

Mingi’s eyes widen at the news of the big wave. “Bro the waves about to come in 10, let’s go catch it !” You roll your eyes and ask for a to go box. Yunho pats your shoulder. “No need to worry, I can always swim if I get wiped out.” He gives you a playful wink before heading out with the guys.

————————-

You guys return to the beach. You pull out your to-go box and munch on your leftovers while watching the beach goers and occasionally watching the guys and their antics.

Yunho stops by your tower with his board. “Hey do you got any board wax ?” You usually have some but Mingi used up the last bit. “Sorry I’m all out” Yunho was staring at you as though he didn’t care.

“It’s ok, by the way there’s sauce on your shirt.” You look down and see the grease spot that you couldn’t see due to your lifeguard swimsuits’s red hue. “God. Thanks Yunho.”

“Don’t worry you still look good..I mean you always look pretty.”

“Oh..thank you, again.” You practically shrink into yourself after the compliment. Yunho fondly stares “I was wondering if..”

“ YUNHOOO THE WAVES HERE.” Yunho quickly turns before grabbing his board. He turns back to you looking torn between the wave and the convo. “Talk to you later ?” “No worries just tell me when you’re done.” He smiles and rushes over to the guys getting ready in the water.

Time passes and you see the guys close by splashing water on each other. However, you realize Yunho isn’t there ? Your intuition screams for you to look farther with your binoculars.

You see him riding a large wave. Focused and concentrated. But. You noticed where the crack in his board was began to split, and soon Yunho gets engulfed into the water. When you see him not come back to the surface you know somethings wrong.

You get off the tower and run down into the shore. You tell Mingi to come with you to help Yunho.

After swimming over and a draw boat comes, Yunho is finally safe. You, Mingi and Yunho go to the nearby clinic to ensure he’s fully ok. You waited in the waiting room while Mingi was inside with Yunho. Finally, Mingi comes out.

“Hey is Yunho ok did they- ?”

“He thinks you’re cute.” Mingi shrugs and takes his phone out.

You can feel the heat fill your face from the random info. “I didn’t ask that, but thanks ? Is he ok though.” You’re sure he is from Mingi’s calmness but still need the verbal assurance.

“Yea he’s perfectly fine, waves just knocked the wind out of him.” Mingi’s demeanor is unphased..which is a switch from how scared and worried he was initially, it seems like he’s even smirking from your concern.

“That’s good..thank god.” Relief washes over you but you can still see Mingi’s smirk.

“So when are you telling him you like him.” He says still typing away on his phone.

“What,,your bestfriend just almost drowned why are you asking silly shit.”

“My bestfriend is completely fine and I’ll let him know to text you.”

“What.”

Mingi starts to walk back into the room Yunhos in. “Just let him take you out.” He closes the door, and now you’re just sat there speechless.

————————-

“Meet me at the shaved ice shop at 8 ?”

That’s the text Yunho sent a week after the surfing incident. You already know Mingi told him to text you. You’re whirling in a mixture of nervousness and embarrassment.

You sit at a stool in the icee shop checking your phone trying to keep yourself occupied. Then you see him. In a plain black tee and grey jeans..outside of his typical swim short and sandals attire.

You both begin to talk. You expected an awkward conversation considering how you two were aware of one another but not close..however, you two meshed so well ? Finishing each others thoughts and falling into each others jokes with no hesitation. Such a smooth and clean interaction.

“I just wanted to thank you..the guys would’ve never knew I was in trouble if it wasn’t for you.”

“No need to thank me..it’s my job, but like literally.” Yunho let’s out a breathy laugh at your words, covering his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Hey shop closes up in 5, time to head out.” The shop manager tells you while gesturing at the door. You both head out and walk over to Yunho’s car.

He stops you with a hand on your shoulder. “I have my swim trunks and a blanket so we could swim and hang out if you’re not ready to go home.”

“Do you always keep a blanket in your car ?” You laugh.

“No no but, I really did want to spend time with you alone…we can leave now if you want…” Yunho looks away, running his hand through his hair.

“It’s ok…come on let’s go.” You reach your hand out to Yunho, fingers interlocked you two walk to the lower part of the beach. You take off your clothes..your swimsuit being underneath.

“Do you always keep a swimsuit under your clothes.” Yunho playfully mocks. You roll your eyes trying to hide your amusement.

You both swam together. Splashing water alongside of Yunho trying to teach you some swimming tricks he learned for if he wiped out on his board. The moonlight and stars leave bright streaks in the ocean swallowed by the night.

Soon you both get tired and return to the higher part of the beach while Yunho lays out the blanket. You both started sitting away from each other, talking more and finishing things discussed in the shop. Slowly it became you and Yunho laying side by side, hands brushing against each other.

“Hey..” he tilts your head to look at him. “Yes…” He looks into your eyes and looks away before returning them back. “I know we don’t talk but..I think I really like you.”

You stare, heart pumping harder at his words. He bites his lip in regret “I know that was too random, sorry I’ll take you home.”

“…Yunho don’t…I like you too..” You’re both facing each other, close enough to wear you feel each others breaths.

“You do….”

“I do.”

In seconds Yunho’s lips were on yours. His kisses were slow and methodical, his hand cupping your cheek while the free hand was set on your hip. Soon his tongue was brought into it, slowly whirling with yours.

Now..you knew what you were about to do was bold. But you couldn’t help it. You got on top of Yunho, hands sliding down his bare torso on his damp skin. This kiss continues and you feel him bring his hands to your hips.

You begin to grind down, not as fast or steady as you wanted due to nervousness. Yunho understands though, and ground you into him for you. The kiss finally breaks and you take a breath..the reality of it all hits you and you hide your face away in an attempt not to be consumed by his gaze.

Yunho can’t help but to want to see and relish in your shyness and glassy eyes. He puts his fingers to your chin, making you look at him.

“Getting shy on me ?” He says stroking your chin. He brings the hand back down onto your hip and continues to grind you two together. You can feel his bulge, the sensation intense from the thinness of your swimwear bottoms.

After mustering enough courage you reach down his swim trunk’s waistband.

“Can I...” Yunho is reeling at the fact you can’t even look him in the eye. “Go ahead baby..” Yunho nods and watches you go further down his torso. You pull the shorts down and there it was. His cock springs up, unbearably hard and oozing precum.

You lightly pump him in your hand and he winces in pleasure. After bringing your confidence up you bring your lips to the tip of his cock and suck. Yunho’s head is thrown back, lips parted. You begin bobbing your head up and down, struggling to take it all in your mouth. Yunho’s ok with that though…he actually finds it cute.

“Fuck…you’re doing so good for me.”

He gather your hair in his hand and helps you make your way up and down his cock. You peer up at him seeing him with a face of content while also taking airy breaths. You feel him twitch in your mouth. That’s when he pulls you away.

“You’ve helped me too much, I need to return the favor…” Yunho swiftly lays you back and pulls off your swim bottoms.

Such a view for him. Your skin moistened by the remaining sea water sitting on it, body unveiled to him..breast peaking from your swim top due to it being disheveled from all the movement. He opens your legs, another lovely view..your heat is sopping wet. He groans from the sight alone.

He pulls your swim top off, it was barely hanging on anyway. Parting your legs, he leans down and places kisses across your inner thighs. Then begins nipping and sucking at the skin. Your hips begin to stutter up from anticipation.

“Mm someone’s getting impatient hm ?” Yunho lightly swipes his thumb across your clit leading you to sigh.

“ ‘need your mouth on me…”. Your face is beyond warm and hot…being so exposed has you losing your mind but in a way…gives you more sexual gratification.

He takes his thumb away and begins licking and nipping at your clit. Fingers making their way into your hole, curling in a “come here” motion. You find solace by grabbing his hair, gently pulling which makes him take it farther.

He laps at your cunt. Sucking at your clit while speedily fucking you with his index and middle finger. The alarming pace with his fingers easing more of your arousal out. “..Yunho..more, please fuck..” He takes his fingers away and starts making out with your cunt. You’re bucking into his face while his tongue takes you apart.

“Cum on my face for me ” You’re done for. His tongue finds the perfect rhythm flicking against your clit. Then he places open mouthed kisses on your cunt.

You cum all over his face and he licks up as much of your essence as he can. He comes back to your face and kiss you; tasting yourself and his lip balm. “We can stop now if you want…” he whispers kissing down your neck, his cock hard against you.

You shake your head no. “Inside..I need you inside..” Yunho loses it at the confirmation. He opens your legs up for him and kisses you while bringing his cock into you. He presses all his weight onto you while slowly thrusting his cock into your soaking core. You’re filled to the hilt..his cock stretching you while his tip thumps against your gspot.

It’s all so intoxicating. The scent of the cool beach and him mixing with your own scent. Combined with the wetness shared between your bodies and the sensation of his cock stuffing you full over and over again.

Your senses are overloaded. All your pussy can do is clench around his cock. Yunho is just as fucked out..feelings your plush walls tighten around him.

“Fuck. Almost everyday..” His hips meet yours in a harsher fashion. “Almost everyday I see you…in that swimsuit.” The drags of his cock are becoming heavier and heavier. “And I just think about having you all to myself..pull the swimsuit off you and fucking you…just like this.”

Yunho takes notice of how your cunt sucks him in with his words. “I bet you knew…I bet you wanted the same..” He slams into your cunt with the punctuation. “So fucking good.” Your moans are loud. Praying nobody is taking a late night visit to the beach because they’d know exactly what you were doing. You naturally quiet yourself by biting your lip.

Yunho stops your silence by snapping his hips faster while kissing you. He holds your face in his large hand while he fucks into you harshly. He pulls his lips away, his sighs and groans in unison with your moans and whines. “Who cares if someone hears..I need to hear you.”

His thrusts become sloppy and lose their tempo. He’s just as close as you are. “You gonna cum on my cock for me ?” Only moans of affirmation can be vocalized. After his tip hits the right spot a few more times you cum on it. Your arousal covering his cock and lower abdomen.

His thrust falter. He pulls out but his tip is still pressed onto your cunt’s bud and he cums all over your pussy. You can feel his warm seed run down your folds.

You both fully collapse onto the blanket. The air is filled with sex and the humidity from the weather. You can hear the ocean sway and Yunho’s breaths. Above you the still moon and stars. Your eyes begin to lull before Yunho rises and picks you up off the blanket.

He takes you both to the mini showers used for washing sand off and cleans you both up. You both put your clothes on, him helping you put on yours while asking if you’re ok and whispering affirmations.

Soon you both head back to his car and begin to ride along the beachside. His hand occasionally resting on your thigh during the ride. Soon you both finally arrive to your home to drop you off.

“Are you on beach duty tomorrow.” He asks drawing shapes into your hand with his fingers.

“I shouldn’t be.” You begin holding his hand, rubbing your thumb against his.

“Meet me at the shaved ice shop again ?”

[9amartt]

The gheerah of Allah

Allah is not pleased with that the one who knew him, and tasted the sweetness of being close to him, and the peacefulness of being connected to him leaves to the love of someone else, or neglects him, so when his servant does such act, he makes his life depressed, and covers him with a dress of weakness and humiliation and helplessness to punish him, or perhaps bring him back.

And from his gheerah, he made immoralities forbidden in public and private, and made the punishment of those who commit them severe in dunyah and akhirah, for he can see his servants at all times, and he hates to see them in sin.

And from His gheerah is that when the first man, Adam عليه السلام , desired to live in Jannah forever instead of obeying his lord, he made him and his offspring exit it until the judgement day.

And from his gheerah, when he noticed that Ismail عليه السلام took a part of the heart of his father ibraheem عليه السلام which Allah used to fill before Ismail was born, he ordered him to kill him, as a test and reminder to Ibraheem عليه السلام.

Beware from Allah, for when he sees that the heart of his servant is filled with the love of someone else, he seals it, and makes returning to his worship hard, and loving him all again almost impossible, and one cannot then blame anyone but himself for choosing someone over his lord.

So when you see your heart darken, and your life worsen, ask yourself, who's the first one you think about when you wake up, and who's the last one you think of before your soul returns to it's creator every night, then you'll know the cause, and returning to your lord will be then the solution.

Woe to those who sold the connection to paradise for a fake temporary enjoyment in Dunyah which leads to an everlasting punishment!

-Qamar -inspired by Ibn Al Qayyim's commentary on the ayah 28 of surah Aal Imraan.

"And Allah warns you about Himself."

[sabrgirl]

things that aren't inherently islamic but have improved my deen ♡

practising mindfulness

mindfulness meditation (focusing on my breathing for 10-15 minutes a day and bringing my attention back to my breath every time my mind wanders) helps with concentration in salah. through practising this every day, you're able to bring your attention back to the moment much better as you train your brain to do so with your breath.

helps to ground myself in the moment rather than stress about the future and past - allows me to surrender to Allah سُبْحَٰنَهُۥ وَتَعَٰلَىٰ much better and have tawakkul and sabr by learning to enjoy each day as it comes

journalling

shadow work

islam is fundamentally based on disciplining and self-regulating the nafs/ego. if you do not discipline your nafs, you will end up inclining towards evil: '‘And I do not hold my own self (nafs) to be free from weakness; for, the soul is surely prone to enjoin evil, except that whereon my Lord has mercy. Surely, my Lord is Most Forgiving, Merciful.’ (12:54). it was a saying by many elder islamic scholars and early muslims that 'he who knows himself knows His Lord'.

shadow work is when you address the hidden parts of yourself that we naturally and/or subconsciously suppress inside because we don't like them. the ego/nafs does this. you can find journal prompts on google, for eg 'shadow work prompts for anxious attachment' or 'shadow work prompts for male validation' etc - whatever it is you know is a problem about you. or, if you don't know where to start, just type in 'shadow work prompts' on google and you'll find something for you

through understanding in more detail what my ego does through addressing my fears in life and hardship/trauma i've experienced, i'm able to let go of those parts of myself, make an action plan to do things differently and become a better person. as a result, i'm able to make better decisions based off of righteousness and what pleases Allah, rather than acting based off of what scares my ego.

for eg - something happened when i was young that made me have an internal fear of being replaced which i had *no* idea i had. yet, i was acting on this fear subconciously, as i've always wanted to be original and i've had such distinct/original things that other people don't usually have so that i can stand out and it can become impossible to replace me. i was doing this so subconsiously but my nafs/ego was scared inside. when people asked me 'where is that from?' i wouldn't want them to know and would become very upset if they tried to 'copy me'. it wasn't until my best friend wanted to know where my perfume was from and i didn't want to tell her and ended up arguing with her that i realised i have a problem. i did shadow work and journalled about it to figure out why i'm acting this way. after doing this shadow work, it led me back to that big change in my life when i was a child and i realised that it hurt my ego a lot and resulted in me having a big fear of being replaced, with the outcome being i want to stand out and have things that are my own that it becomes so hard for someone to be me. after addressing and realising this, i've now let go of that fear and that part of me. i'm much more kinder to the creation now when they ask me where something i have/am wearing is from and, as i feel much more peaceful inside, i tell them where it's from with genuineness and sincerity. doing this can help with so many internal behaviours like jealousy, anxiety, being unhappy when other people get something you want, anger, attachments to people, love etc.

shadow work helps me get rid of attachments to worldly things and people (as the ego gets attached easily) after understanding why i am / why i act in a certain way too

gratitude

gratitude journalling helps me be thankful to Allah for what he has done for me. in hardship, i'm able to recognise the good that i still have. i've written more about how this has helped my deen here.

writing my feelings when i'm angry and/or upset

helps me process my emotions better and not act on my feelings by being rude to others in the moment

prevents me from backbiting and gossiping bc i just journal about how people have made me feel. backbiting is when you slander someone behind their back to someone else. through journalling, if i'm upset, i can write down my feelings, i can call people losers and get it all out of my system because it's just to myself, no one will read it. after this, why do i need to go to someone else and gossip? i don't need to. i've already released it all.

yoga and pilates

the physical body, mind and soul are all linked. as shown in the book, 'the philosophy of the teachings of islam':

this means that exercising our body affects our mind and soul too. science has shown that trauma and stress is stored in the shoulders and other parts of our body. having movement and especially exercises like yoga that focuses on stretching, flexibility, breathing and regulating blood flow in the body releases this emotional baggage.

islam is a religion of discipline that requires effort. when you feel good inside, you're more likely to be more disciplined and put in the effort, as opposed to when you feel bad inside which can often lead to laziness and fatigue. doing yoga and releasing my stress through exercising and stretching helps me feel positive and good inside, enabling me to fulfil my religious duties better with a positive mind and body. in islam, maintaining physical health is highly encouraged and our Beloved Prophet ﷺ emphasised having a strong and healthy body.

[mysticheathenn]

What Is Your Next Tower Moment?

Hi, Hexlings!

This pick-a-card reading is for my Patreon All Tiers. This pick-a-card reading is all about what chaos will the universe (God, Allah, etc) bring to shake up your world to bring in change.

This is a general reading, remember to take what resonates and leave what does not. This reading does not supplement your need to seek professional help. Tarot should be used as entertainment and not a for sure answer to your problems but as a guide, a sense of hope, and amusement.

Take your time when choosing your pile. Ask yourself the question and choose the picture that you can’t stop looking at. Listen to your intuition.

Extended Patreon Includes:

Why Is this Happening?

What outcome can this tower moment bring?

Extra Messages

MasterList

Patreon Link

Ko-Fi Donations

Pile l:

What is Your Next Tower Moment? Tarot: 10 of Swords, 8 of Wands (reversed), Judgement, The Tower, The High Priestess (reversed)

Endings. There is something in your life pile l that you keep ignoring your intuition that is causing you displeasure, pain, unhappiness, etc that you are taking your very sweet slow time in trying to correct or remove this issue from your life. This could be a dead-end relationship, a job, your living situation, etc. Overall you are in a toxic environment and I feel you have been given so many chances to try and correct, end, or do something with this situation and you keep ignoring your intuition to the point the universe and spirit guides are starting to get a bit frustrated because they want better for you. They are close to taking matters into their own hands and literally rocking your world if you do not take care of this situation yourself in a timely manner. For those who are in a relationship that is either dead or toxic the quote that came to me "Never let someone tell you they don't want you twice." That "twice" is going to be the universe stepping in to cause a situation they know you can no longer overlook to end things. This doesn't have to be a relationship, this could be a job, even school. Some of you I feel are in a major that you don't want to do anymore or at a school you no longer want to be at but because it's cheaper, your friends are there, it's close to home, etc you decide to keep attending. Patreon Post Link

Pile ll:

What is Your Next Tower Moment? Tarot: 8 of Wands (reversed), 10 of Cups (reversed), The Fool, Ace of Cups, 6 of Wands

"What you want is on the other side of fear." - Will Smith. At first pile ll I was a bit confused because you have nothing but successful cards that came out for you. 8 of cups is all about rapid movement, Ace & 10 of cups is all about varied fulfillment (emotional, financial, etc), The fool new beginnings, and 6 of wands is the victory card...so why the long face in this reading you may ask and I believe there are quite a few of you that may have resonated from my previous reading "Where does your life require focus". You may have chosen pile ll or pile lll maybe even a part of pile lV but mostly pile ll and lll where I discussed acting on and believing in your goals, dreams, and etc. This is also your tower moment where the universe/your spirit team are ready to push you from the nest whether you are "ready" or not. Ready or Not by The Fugees is playing in my head. It's the chorus part:

"Ready or not, here I come, you can't hide Gonna find you and take it slowly Ready or not, here I come, you can't hide Gonna find you and make you want me"

They are tired of you wanting to do things when you are ready. The time is now to act on your visions, goals, and dreams. "If you never start you will never act." "There is never a right time." So many quotes are coming in for you pile ll and I think you know all of this but yet there is still no movement on your part. It's as if you hear and see things that encourage and remind you to take the jump and you get inspired but then never act on the things you are being called to do. It's getting to the point where some of you are getting annoyed because you can't escape these messages...well here we are again love. So sorry to be the one to do this to you as well to remind you to just jump. This is very specific for a few of you but you do not need to have an aesthetically pleasing place to live to shoot videos, nor do you need a billion dollars to start. You have everything you need just use the resources you have and start. Patreon Post Link

Pile lll:

What is Your Next Tower Moment? Tarot: 3 of Pentacles, 2 of Swords, Five of Wands (reversed), 10 of Pentacles (Reversed), 10 of Cups

Avoidance. Loss. This is my passive-aggressive pile. Some of you may hate dealing with confrontation and deal with things either passively-aggressively or just sweep things underneath the rug to keep the "peace." Unfortunately for you pile lll you will no longer be able to keep doing what you are doing. The blindfolds are coming off and you will have to deal with your circumstances one way or another. For some of you, this has to do with finances, I'm hearing you letting someone borrow money and they fail to pay you back or even you failing to keep a budget and overspending because you are constantly treating yourself and/or filling the hole in your life with things and not addressing the real issue. For others of you this is more so about the people around you that is causing you to feel this intermoil. You keep turning a blind eye to everything they are doing and not holding people accountable for their actions even when they are hurting you and others around you. The Ace of Cups card is a cup that has a hand and a cup that is overflowing with love, fulfillment, and peace but instead of that for you it's as if you are constantly always overflowing with chances, don't worry about it, I'm fine, etc. It's getting to the point where your cup is about to run dry on the behaviors of others around you and even yourself when it comes to your financial situation. This may be really specific for a few of you but stop letting other people stop your bag. For some of you, this is your management team at your job, family, friends, etc. Someone could be stopping your bag because of horrible scheduling at work, you not wanting to be around certain people so you keep the peace knowing management is trash, whatever the reasoning is you are taking a financial loss by allowing others to constantly walk all over you. Some of you are keeping the peace because you want a promotion, raise, etc when really you are taking a loss emotionally, financially, etc. Patreon Post Link

Thank you for liking and reblogging my readings. I always appreciate you guys on here and on Patreon.

Stay safe and be blessed

[mlmxreader]

A Grounded Pilot | Alejandro Vargas x trans!m!reader

Anonymous asked: And well it means I'll request again.

I had in mind alejandro vargas x pakistani!ftm reader where reader is again a pilot and he has to go on a mission but, his jet goes off the radar for a week before the people that were sent to search for him bring him back, he had injuries but he wasn't severely injured. He would be devastated about his favorite jet. With this prompt "I was so fucking worried, when they'd said that you-" "Hey, it's alright. Look, I'm fine" 

Sorry if this is too specific and confusing, feel free to ignore it :)

-🦝

summary: Alejandro is all too aware that being in the air force is dangerous, but that won’t stop him from worrying when the man he loves suddenly disappears. 

tws: mentions of blood/bruises/minor injury, plane crashes, swearing, smoking 

Every day had felt like a curse as Alejandro religiously checked his phone and checked any letters that had been addressed to him, always chewing his lip and reading things once, twice, three times, sometimes four, just to make sure that he had read them properly; he didn’t want to think that it was true, he didn’t want to think that every day, another squadron of the Pakistan Air Force had been sent out to retrieve you and had come back empty handed every fucking day. Sometimes, Alejandro would ask Allah to do him a favour, and to keep an eye on you, keep you safe until you could be found again, but he knew that it was a lot to ask; it had been several days since you had gone off of the radar during a mission, and nobody had seen hide nor hair of you and could hardly even stomach the thought of thinking the worst. Not you, you couldn’t be dead, not when you were an aerial ace in your own right and when Alejandro knew, he fucking knew better than anyone else, that you were the most talented, most lethal, most dangerous pilot that the Pakistan Air Force had to offer. 

You couldn’t be dead, Alejandro knew that, but his hope that you would ever be found was beginning to fade; he didn’t think that you would be dead, he knew better than that, but captured? Held somewhere either for ransom or so that some asshole could torture you for information? Those were both likely, especially where the game of war was considered; it could have easily been the case that someone had grabbed you when you landed for a moment, and that they had dragged you off somewhere. You could be chained up, bloody, beaten for all Alejandro knew. You could be bloodied and bruised and weak and on death’s door, begging for mercy and begging for you life, maybe even trying to bargain your life for someone else’s; Alejandro was giving up hope that you would be found, if he was honest, he knew that the chances of you being found in a warzone went from slim to none within hours, and as the days crawled by and started to approach a week - a week with Pakistani pilots telling him that they were sorry, but they had not found you - Alejandro knew that the chances of you being alive got smaller.

“Will you find him this time?” Alejandro asked, tears in his eyes and desperation in his voice as he held Ansharah’s hand tightly. “Iqbal, please, you have to find him.”

Ansharah gave his hand a little squeeze as she sniffled and licked her lips, not really sure how to answer as she shook her head and swallowed thickly. “Ale, I will do what I can, I promise.”

“You have to find him,” his voice was getting more desperate, more weak and pleading. “You have to bring him home.”

“I’m gonna do my best,” her voice broke a little bit as tears came to her eyes, shaking her head as she cleared her throat. “I’ll do my very best to find (y/n), you know that… you just focus on getting yourself cleaned up, Ale - go shower, go get something to eat. Please?”

Alejandro nodded, but didn’t dare to break apart as he pulled her into a tight hug, careful not to mess up her Hijab as he buried his face against her and shook his head. “I miss him… the fucking pendejo shouldn’t have gone out…”

“I miss him, too,” she murmured, rubbing his back. “But he was never the type to follow orders… couldn’t keep him grounded…”

Alejandro eventually broke away, still teary eyed and still hardly able to speak without pleading as he took a step back and wandered off to the showers while Ansharah prepared to go and search for his boyfriend; she had a map with her of where she had not yet looked, and started from the furthest area, making her way back steadily - but as she was turning around to head back to base, she spotted it. The wreckage of a JF-17 Thunder. Her hands shook as she brought herself down to land nearby, shaking her head and repeating the word ‘no’ over and over again as she raced towards the wreckage.

You were there alright, sat on the broken wing as you puffed on a cigarette and waved at her, a grin on your face. “Mornin’ Iqbal - I was starting to think you’d never show up.”

Ansharah’s first instinct was to smack the back of your head, nearly causing you to drop your cigarette as she growled at you softly. “You fucking asshole! We’ve been out looking for you every fucking day! And you’ve just been sat here?!”

“All my Comms were down,” you started, “no radio, no satellite - couldn’t even show up on radar if I tried… the trek to base is fucking three hours, too, mind.”

She frowned at you, then kneeled between your legs as her shaky hands roamed your body, searching for injuries; but all she found were a few scrapes and a few minor cuts that had already healed, mostly cleared up bruises, and ash and charcoal littering your skin. So she didn’t hesitate, waiting for you to finish your cigarette before she dragged you back to her own plane, loaded you up in it, and started the flight back to base.

“The Air Marshal is gonna have my guts for garters,” you sighed. “My fucking plane got wrecked, and it’s my fucking fault.”

Ansharah shook her head, keeping her eyes on where she was going as she sighed. “I know you loved that plane, (y/n), but just be glad that you’re alive - be glad you haven’t been captured, either.”

“But I don’t have a plane,” you pointed out. “What fucking use is a pilot without a plane?”

“One that’s lucky enough to be alive and uncaptured,” she admitted. “Get some rest, Flight Lieutenant, we’ll have you back home soon, anyway.”

You did as she said, getting as comfortable as you could and doing your best to doze off, but you couldn’t sleep; your head was swimming, thoughts of your poor plane, reduced to nothing but rubble and ash as it sat back at the crash site, thoughts of Alejandro, your loving boyfriend who you knew would be worried and would be glad to see you, making you feel guilty for ever leaving in the first place. You shouldn’t have accepted the mission that day, intercepting an enemy aircraft, you should have left it to someone else; maybe if you did, then you never would have worried Alejandro in the first place, you never would have worried anyone if you didn’t leave that day. You didn’t get any sleep, and when Ansharah landed, you were the first to get out, first to run off and to find Alejandro; he crashed into you, wrapping his arms around you tightly as he held you so close, his eyes wide and teary.

“You pendejo,” he grumbled. “I told you not to go! I told you not to leave! You… you could’ve been killed, amor… fuck, I was so fucking worried when they’d said that you-”

“Hey, it’s alright. Look, I’m fine,” you pulled away so that he could get a good look at you, smiling weakly as you allowed him to put his hands on you, roaming your body as he asked if it hurt. “My plane’s fucked, but I’m alright.”

“Oh, amor,” he said softly, raising his brows a little as he gently cradled your face in his hands, shaking his head. “(y/n), mis disculpas, I know how much that plane meant to you…”

“I’m grounded, Ale,” you said, shaking your head. “I’m useless.”

“No, no,” Alejandro shook his head again, daring to press a sweet kiss to your forehead. “You’re not useless, mi rey, you’ll get another plane…”

He couldn’t stop himself, grabbing you and pulling you in close again as he sniffled and pressed his mouth to your shoulder, keeping you so close to his own body that he could have sworn he could hear your heart thudding gently; he had been so worried, so fucking terrified that he had lost you, that you had gotten captured or worse, that he couldn’t help but to be a little overwhelmed with joy to have you back. To hold you in his arms again was just a way of making sure that he knew, that he could not doubt, that you were well and truly back and that, above all else, you were alright. He didn’t even try and hold back the few tears that he dared to shed against your jacket, leaving little wet spots as he did his best not to become too overwhelmed and give himself a headache; but then you pulled away, your eyes glistening with unshed tears as you reached into your pocket, and pulled out the packet of cigarettes that you had managed to save from the wreckage.

“Ale, you want one?”

He nodded, letting you light it for him before he dared to take it, taking a long drag and hoping that it would steady him slightly. “Gracias, mi amado… shit, it’s so good to have you back.”

You smiled when he grinned, nodding slowly as you took a drag from your cigarette and cleared your throat. “Take me home, Ale… please?”

“Of course,” he agreed without even needing to think about it. “But catch your breath a moment… are you sure you’re okay?”

“I’m not broken,” you told him gently, shaking your head. “I’m not broken, I’m not even that bruised - it’s all shit that’s healed over, or mostly healed over.”

“Have the medics checked you over?” He asked, and when you told him that he was the first person you had seen, he sighed. “Come on, we’ll get you checked out by them before we go home, estúpido, you should know that I can wait!”

“Alejandro,” you couldn’t help but to laugh, looking at him so terribly fondly. You didn’t move as he started to walk off.

But then he turned back, and he dared to smile again as he swiped a hand down his face. “Sorry, amor, but-”

“You’re worried,” you dared to catch up to him, taking his hand in yours and daring to rub his knuckles with the pad of your thumb. “I know, but you don’t have to be. I’m alright.”

“I won’t believe that until a medic says otherwise,” Alejandro admitted, scratching his jaw as he let out a long sigh. “Por favor, mi amor, for me?”

You looked him up and down, realising just how worried he was, and you couldn’t help but to nod slowly as you licked your lips. “Alright, alright, for you, I will go and get myself checked out - once I get the all clear, can we please go home?”

He nodded, kissing your forehead as he dared to crack half of a smile. “Of course, but only if you get all the all clear. Is that understood?”

“Yes, Colonel,” you teased, and when he shot you a playful glare, you dared to grin. “Still don’t think I’m perfectly okay?”

“No,” he deadpanned, removing his hand from your grasp so that he could wrap his arm around you, keep you close to his side so that he wouldn’t forget what it felt like to hold you, to be close. “You’re getting checked out by the medics, (y/n), I won’t take you home unless they say you’re fine.”

“You worry too much,” you told him softly, kissing his neck so awfully tenderly. “Y’know that, don’t you?”

“Maybe I do,” he agreed. “But you don’t worry enough, Flight Lieutenant.” 

if you liked this fic, REBLOG IT - you SHOULD reblog it; if you don’t wanna reblog, then you’ll get blocked; reblogging is the BARE MINIMUM.

[lughatul-qurania]

Forgiveness Is for Allah ﷺ 🤍✨

It is of vital importance to recognize that your forgiveness of someone who wronged you is not for that person’s sake. It is an act of worship that you are doing for the sake of Allah Most High alone.

With this outlook, one realizes that forgiveness is not only given to those who deserve it or on condition that they are remorseful – it is given as an act of worship to Allah Most High.

We can see this in the life of the Prophet (may Allah bless him and give him peace) very clearly. When he was chased out of the city of Taif by the riffraff of the city chasing and stoning him – what did He ﷺ do?

Even though he was given complete permission from Allah Most High to destroy them, the prophet ﷺ forgave them and prayed, “It is my hope that Allah will bring forth from their loins those who will worship Allah, alone.”

In another similar situation, He ﷺ prayed, “O Allah, guide my people, for they know not.”

In neither of these cases did the people have any remorse for their actions, rather, they persisted in them.

Forgiveness is Honor

The Prophet ﷺ said, “… Allah does not increase a servant when they pardon except in honor, and whoever is humble for Allah’s sake, He raises their rank.”

[Muslim]

Forgiveness Is a Means to Be Forgiven

Allah Most High says, “Do not let the people of virtue and affluence among you swear to suspend donations to their relatives, the needy, and the emigrants in the cause of Allah. Let them pardon and forgive. Do you not love to be forgiven by Allah? And Allah is All-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” [Quran; 24:22]

This verse was revealed about Abu Bakr al-Siddiq (Allah be pleased with him) when he refused to continue financially supporting his cousin, Mistah, who accused his daughter Aisha, the wife of the Prophet (may Allah bless him and give him peace), of fornication.

Allah Most High advised him and us to forgive as a means of seeking Allah’s forgiveness for ourselves.

A close friend and respected scholar gave a beautiful point of advice:

“Beware of being majestic (jalali) with people, lest Allah be so with you.”

We should treat people the way we want Allah to treat us. We would not be able to take Allah’s complete justice for ourselves. We need Allah’s mercy, so we should live with mercy.

The Prophet ﷺ said, “Those who show mercy will be shown mercy by the Most Merciful. Have mercy on the inhabitants of the Earth, and the inhabitants of the Heavens will have mercy on you.” [Tirmidhi; Abu Dawud]

[b-lessings]

On a super serious note, I know in modern day psychology it is advised not to bring up " faith " to a depressed person or someone struggling with their mental health because it might backfire, and it might cause them to feel guilty, feel like a not good enough Muslim for example, worse still, they could risk to denounce the whole concept altogether in a moment of anger or despair. However, reflecting on my personal experience. A couple of years ago I was on SSRIs and I suffered strong side effects and decided to go off of them all by myself (I totally do not recommend that). And now I am thinking how did I manage to wire my brain in a way it reabsorbs little miss Sarah Tonin on its own after that? What was the " agent " that helped my brain to function properly if I went off of my SSRIs ? Only to find that the answer was Eman. Faith. And learning to have tawakkul on Allah swt, learning how to shape your life around Allah swt, learning how to make Allah swt the center of your life and the essence of your existence, relate everything to Him swt, understand everything through Him swt. That's what got me afloat and then brought me back to shore. Sübhanallah. But, not to romanticize the struggle , I am well aware that writing comments like " you should read Quran" or " go make prayer " to someone who's opening up about their depression or any similar draining mental illnesses can sound very insensitive. You have to understand that this person may not be able to lift their head off of their pillow or leave their bed for days. The role Eman plays here starts in the heart. The light needs to sneak through the cracks of their heart, and that is something only Allah swt is capable of doing. They just have to be open to let that light enter. I think what I wanted with this is for it to be a little message of hope, a sign if you're looking for one, whatever you're going through, you'll overcome it, I promise. We all did. We are all still here, with hearts beating, loving, and worshipping their Creator. Alhamdullillah. Turn toward Him and rely on Him, because that's the only way out.

May Allah swt mend all broken hearts, tired hearts, sinking hearts. May Allah swt revive the dead hearts,make them flourish with the beauty of Eman, brigng them closer to Him and show them His straight path. Ameen.

- A.Z. 🤍🍃

[islamicspecialistforloveback]

Dua To Get Your Ex Husband Back After Divorce

If you are reading this article right now, it means that you have experienced a separation or divorce from your partner and you want to know how to put the pieces back together. Though I know that you are experiencing a considerable amount of heartache right about now, I want you to know that you have come to the right place Today we will share an Islamic Dua To Get Your Ex Husband Back After…

[sjsmith56]

More Than a Client - A Private Man, Chapter 3

Summary: Tracey admits that she has become emotionally involved with Bucky. Before she’s free to date him there is a two month cooling off period with no contact. While she is gone, an incident occurs.

Length: 4.3 K

Characters, Bucky, Rebecca, Tracey, Amina, Marie.

Warnings: Some angst from Bucky. Intervention in a crime.

Author notes: I’ve tried to show a “normal” sibling relationship between Bucky and Rebecca. She likes to tease him but she loves him dearly. He loves her just as much but doesn’t quite know how to respond to her teasing. Shukran lika – Arabic for thank you [from Google Translate].

<<Chapter 2

☕️ 🍪 🍕

On Tuesday Amina showed up at 1:30 to watch Rebecca, bringing some ingredients with her to do some more baking for them.  When Bucky offered to pay her for her efforts she put her hand out in opposition.

"No, Mr. Bucky," she stated.  "I bake because I like you and Mrs. Rebecca.  You are friends and it is my pleasure to bake for my friends."

"But you do so much already," he said.  "We were strangers 10 days ago."

"In my religion there is a saying," she replied.  "If you help someone, Allah helps you.  Someday my family will need help and I am ensuring that I will receive it."

"You're very kind," replied Bucky.  "Shukran lika."

"You're very welcome.  Now go to your meeting.  Say hello to Miss Tracey Harris."  He looked surprised at her.  "You think none of us noticed the looks between you?  She is a good woman and needs a good man.  You can be good for each other.  Go, don't be late."

Shaking his head Bucky left for the coffee shop, located a few blocks away.  He arrived first and ordered himself a regular coffee.  Nursing it, he waited patiently.  When Tracey arrived he stood up and pulled a chair out for her.

"What would you like?" he asked.  "My treat."

"Um, a caffè latte, please," she said.  "I wouldn't mind a snack.  I didn't get lunch today.  Just a muffin, perhaps."

Bucky nodded and ordered her coffee and a carrot muffin.  He waited for the coffee and brought it the table.  Sitting across from her he sipped his drink.

"Foggy Nelson came yesterday," he said.  "Rebecca really likes him.  He suggested a different way to make sure I get the house, joint tenancy with survivorship ... something like that.  It means my name goes on the deed and if anything happens to Rebecca then I'm her immediate survivor.  She is still doing a will for her personal possessions.  He's also going to look into my back pay claim.  I won't hold my breath on that."

"He is very passionate about his job," said Tracey.  "He and his partner have helped a lot of people who have lost faith in the system.  If he can get your back pay settled you could switch to day shift and live a more normal life.  That's your goal isn't it?  A normal life with your sister?"

"I guess," replied Bucky, trying not to stare too much.  "I haven't really had a normal life since the 40s.  Not sure I remember how to live one.  Although I guess if I switched to day shift I could start dating, if I met someone who would go out with me.  I tried the dating apps but ...."

He stopped, embarrassed at telling her what type of woman swiped right on his profile in the dating apps.  She smiled sympathetically.

"I can understand what you're going through," she said, "more than you think.  I've been divorced for four years and I think I've had maybe four dates in all that time.  Two of them wanted me to go home with them right away and were angry that they spent money on me and I didn't put out."  Bucky frowned at that admission.  "One was angry over his own divorce and spent the entire date complaining about women who were out to emasculate men."

She stopped and took a drink of her coffee.  "And the fourth one?" asked Bucky, gently.

She took another drink of her coffee before speaking.  "Was charming and sociable.  Then I woke up alone in a cheap motel and didn't remember how I got there .... You can guess the rest."

Bucky seethed inside, that someone would do such a thing.  He knew of guys who had done similar things before the war and had taken justice into his own hands a few times.  He swallowed his anger and looked at Tracey.

"I'm sorry," he said.  "It didn't happen often in my day but even once was too much.  It must have put you off of dating completely."

"It did," she admitted, then she sipped her coffee and looked at her cup.  "Then I met a kind, quiet, private man who faced his own challenges.  He asked me out and I had to turn him down because he was technically a client but as of yesterday he's not anymore."

She kept looking at her coffee for a moment then raised her eyes to his surprised look.  "Me?  You're talking about me?"

"I talked to my supervisor," she said.  "Told her I stayed the night at your house to watch your sister while you worked the night shift, and that I gave you both a ride to the newcomer centre for a social event on the weekend, then organized a Sunday meeting with the volunteers at your house.  She agreed that I've become emotionally involved with you and Rebecca.  Another nurse will take her on as a client."

"You're not in trouble, are you?" he asked, his face and voice full of concern.  "I never wanted you to get into trouble."

"No, it's a hazard of the profession," replied Tracey, with a slight smile.  "I reported it right away like I was supposed to.  After a cooling off period I'll be free to go out with you, if you're willing to wait a bit."

Bucky felt a warmth inside that he hadn't felt for a long time, not since the war when he thought he fell in love with an army secretary.  He never had the chance to find out about her because he fell from the train a week later.  Tracey's cheeks were coloured pink and she looked anxious, as if she had put herself out on a limb and was afraid to climb back to the safety of the tree trunk.

"How long is the cooling off period?" he asked, trying to keep his voice calm.

"Two months," she replied.  "No contact with each other.  The new nurse has been fully briefed on the situation and agrees that Rebecca needs to be at home with you.  The volunteers are doing a great job and if you get the funding to hire someone they can apply for the job and actually get paid for it."

Bucky took a big breath and sat back for a moment.  He never expected that Tracey would take the step of transferring Rebecca's case to someone else.  She still wasn't looking at him and he realized that he hadn't really said he would be there for her.

"I came here with the intention of asking you to give up Rebecca as a client," he admitted.  "I like you, a lot.  You're a kind woman and you've been very understanding with me.  I'll wait as long as it takes for your cooling off period.  You're worth it to me.  I just hope I'm worth it to you."

She smiled shyly and it was like a fountain began flowing inside of him at the sight of her lovely smile, that she was gifting to him.  They both took a drink of their coffees and Tracey finished her muffin.  When it was time to go Bucky walked her to her car, waiting patiently as she unlocked the door and opened it.  He looked intently at her, unable to take his eyes off of her lips.  Suddenly she put her hand on his cheek and he leaned down kissing her gently.  They each smiled self consciously then he stepped back while she got behind the wheel.  As she pulled away he watched until he couldn't see her car anymore.  Both of them had the same soft look on their faces.

When he walked in the door of the house both Amina and Rebecca noticed Bucky didn't have his normal stoic face on.  Instead he had what Amina thought was a hopeful face, as if he had seen something that made him feel good about his life.

"How did the coffee date go?" asked Rebecca.

"It wasn't a date," said Bucky, sounding positive.  "It was a meeting with your former nurse.  I say former because you'll have a new nurse starting Friday.  I forgot to ask for her name."

"What about Miss Tracey?" asked Amina, taking a tray of cookies out of the oven.  

"She asked to be removed as Rebecca's nurse," he said, stopping so that he was in between the kitchen and the living room, visible to both women.  "Apparently, if she is emotionally involved with a client it's not ethical for her to stay on as their nurse.  She'll be able to visit as a friend in two months."

"Two months is a long time," noted Rebecca.

"I'll manage," said Bucky.  "Amina, I need to take a nap.  Are you going to be here for a while?"

"For about another hour," she said, looking at the clock on the wall.  "Sweet dreams."

Rebecca snorted as Amina giggled.  Bucky’s face coloured up a bit but nothing was going to affect the good feeling he had since he kissed Tracey.  Kicking his shoes off, he laid on top of the bed.  The window was open and he could hear bird song outside.  Focussing on that he fell into an easy sleep quickly.

There's a song playing as he and Tracey are standing close to each other.  He's heard it on the radio before but he doesn't know the title or who sings it.  The lyrics include references to Rudolph Valentino and Greta Garbo but what he really likes is that he's in a suit, Tracey is in a dress and they begin dancing to this song.  They're in a garden, with fairy lights all around, and the moon is making everything glow in its silvery light.  The song ends with him falling in love with her and what is even better, her falling in love with him.  As the dream fades to darkness Bucky kisses Tracey passionately.

Bucky opened his eyes and sat up.  That song was in his head.  He could hear it but except for Valentino, Garbo and falling in love he couldn't discern the rest of the lyrics.  He got up and noticed Rebecca was asleep on her bed.  For a minute he watched her chest rise and fall as she rested, then he closed the door.  A note was on the kitchen counter.

I helped Mrs. Rebecca go to bed at 3:30 pm and left shortly after.  I'm happy for you and Miss Tracey.  She is worth waiting for.  I will see you Thursday for my regular shift.

Amina Nyok

He smiled then opened the fridge and took out the chicken breasts he defrosted.  He also took out mushrooms, baby spinach and three cloves of garlic.  He sliced the mushrooms, crushed the garlic and put them both in the frying pan with some olive oil, then added the baby spinach and some thyme.  While that cooked he sliced pockets in the chicken and seasoned them with salt and pepper.  He stuffed the mushroom filling in the pockets, added some mozzarella and sealed the pockets with toothpicks.  Adding some more butter to the frying pan he added the chicken breasts and browned them then transferred them to a baking dish.  For a moment he thought he heard something and he checked on Rebecca.

"Are you awake?" he asked quietly.

"Just," she said sleepily.  "You must have heard me stretching."

He chuckled and came to the side of the bed.  "Do you want to get up?" he asked.  "I can get you up now or continue to make supper and get you up later."

"Now is good," she said.  "Bathroom first."

He helped her sit up and transferred her into the bathroom.  As he lifted her up with one arm he helped her remove her pants and the diaper then lowered her onto the raised toilet seat.

"You good?" he asked.

She nodded and he went back to the kitchen to get the next set of ingredients out for the rice.  When she was done Rebecca called him for help then he carried her into the living room and placed her on the arm chair.  Turning on the TV he put it on the news and returned to the kitchen to continue making dinner.  Half an hour later it was all ready and he served her meal then went back for his.  They watched the news then Bucky watched Jeopardy with Rebecca, trying to guess the answers with her.  During a commercial break she looked at her brother.

"You usually read during these shows," she said.  "What's got you in a good mood?"

"I guess I feel good about Tracey," he said after a moment.  

"I'm glad for you," replied Rebecca.  "I just hope her replacement is as nice as she was."

"It'll be alright," said Bucky.

The commercial ended and they continued to watch Jeopardy.  By the time Kalyna came for her shift Rebecca was all ready for bed and Bucky read her another bed time story, this time a chapter from Tuesdays With Morrie.  He kissed her goodnight, said goodnight to Kalyna and ran to the docks.  The following morning Foggy was back with all the documents and they signed everything.

On Friday morning Bucky made sure the house was clean and he had coffee ready.  Amina had baked again, lovely almond cookies that he had a hard time not eating.  When the doorbell rang at 9:30 he went to the door, looked through the cutout window and saw an older woman waiting.  Her eyes grew big when she saw him.

"My goodness, it really is you," she said, then she offered her hand.  "Marie Peters.  I'm the public health nurse assigned to your sister, Rebecca Proctor.  You must be Bucky Barnes."

"I am," he said.  "Come in, please."

He introduced her to his sister and offered a coffee, bringing a small plate of the cookies which she smiled at.  She got right to business, checking Rebecca's blood pressure, pulse, heart, lungs, strength, and asking her several questions about her mental state.  When she was finished she sat back and looked at the two of them.

"Well, Tracey wasn't kidding," she said to Rebecca.  "You're lucky to have a brother who takes such good care of you.  The volunteers who look after her overnight must be good people.  As far as I can tell you're in excellent health.  As for you, Mr. Barnes ... well, most of us were wondering why Tracey would pull herself off this case but I get it now.  You're a handsome man for someone so old."

Bucky's face reddened and Rebecca smiled at this nurse.  "Even the volunteers could see there were sparks between them," she said.  "Tracey is a lovely lady.  How is she doing with her new cases?"

Marie looked at them blankly.  "She didn't tell you?" she asked.  "Tracey is on leave.  She's taken two months off to do some volunteer work in Central America."  Marie noticed Bucky's face.  "Oh dear, it looks like I let the cat out of the bag.  Look, don't see anything nefarious in this.  It was something that came up and she probably took it so that she wasn't tempted to make contact with you during the cooling off period.  If you care about her you'll accept that she'll be back in two months and you'll both be free to see each other."

Bucky nodded but both women could see the disappointment on his face.  When Marie left Bucky plopped himself down on the sofa and looked at Rebecca.

"Why would she leave and not tell me?" he asked.  "I can accept she would remove herself from temptation but to not even say goodbye?  What am I supposed to think?"

"Have faith in her Bucky," said Rebecca soothingly.  "It will be alright."

As happy as Bucky had been the previous few days once he heard Tracey was out of the country he seemed depressed to everyone who cared about him.  During the week the volunteers brought special baking to cheer him up.  While he was polite to them it was obvious their efforts were not enough to help him feel better.  After Marie's next visit the following Friday even she commented on his demeanour when he abruptly excused himself to go to the store while she was there.

"You'll have to excuse him," said Rebecca.  "Tracey really connected with him.  He's not happy she didn't say goodbye before leaving."

"I emailed her," replied Marie, lowering her voice even though they were the only ones there.  "She feels terrible about it, thinks she might have offended him."

Both women shook their heads over the couple.  Bucky returned shortly before Marie left, carrying a couple of bags of groceries in one hand and mail in the other.  He went straight to the kitchen to put things away then stood at the counter looking at the envelopes.  One of them caught his attention and he looked at it with his jaw set firmly.  Looking up as Marie said her goodbyes he waited until she left before he came into the living room and sat near Rebecca with the envelope.

"It's from Tracey," he said.  "Postmarked Belize."

"You going to read it?" asked Rebecca.

He glanced at her and opened the envelope, unfolded the letter and began reading it.  Rebecca watched as his face became more relaxed and soft.  Then he looked at his sister.

"She's sorry.  She wanted to tell me but was afraid of my reaction, that I would think she was abandoning me.  She did it so that she wasn't tempted to show up at the door."

"Does that make you feel better?" asked Rebecca.  

He flushed and nodded.  "I thought she changed her mind about me.  You know ... my issues were too much for her."

"Bucky, come here," ordered his sister.  He got up and kneeled before her as she took his hand.  "You are a good man.  You're kind, understanding, and you feel things deeply.  What you went through affected you.  Even I can see that.  What's important is that you keep on trying.  She obviously cares if she sent you this letter.  Even if you don't hear from her until she returns believe that she thinks about you.  Because you're worth it."

She placed her hand on his face and kissed his forehead.  He nodded his head in acknowledgement and hugged her.  Her words comforted him and he was glad to hear them.  Just at that moment his phone rang and he pulled it out of his pocket.

"It's Sam," he said, as he touched the Accept button and put it to his ear.  "Hey, how's it going?"

"So, did you talk to that nurse?" asked Sam's voice on speaker.  

Bucky blushed, forgetting he had it on speaker.  Rebecca grinned at him and sat back.  

"Yeah, we talked," said Bucky.  "She already asked to be released from Rebecca's case.  There's a two month cooling off period where we can't communicate so she's gone to Belize to do some volunteer nursing work there."

"That will go by fast," said Sam.  "Listen, I have some lobbying to do in Washington next week.  You up to having me sleep on your couch for next weekend?  Figured it was time to connect with my friend and his sister.  How you doing, Rebecca?  Did he leave the phone on speaker?"

"Yes, he did Sam," laughed Rebecca.  "You're more than welcome to spend the weekend.  Maybe you and I can go out for a night on the town.  Hit up a blues club or something."

"I like your style," said Sam.  "You're a lot more fun than your brother."

"I like the blues," said Bucky weakly.  "Rebecca's usually in bed by 9:30.  Those places don't even get going until then."  Rebecca punched him on the arm and Bucky recoiled, rubbing the spot where she hit.  "Thanks, Sam.  My sister just assaulted me."

Sam chuckled.  "You're the one calling your younger sister old.  I'll see you next weekend."

"Hey Sam," said Rebecca.  "Bring the suit.  Perhaps you can make an appearance at the agency that's been helping us out.  They're great people and I know they would love to have a visit from Captain America."

"I was bringing the suit and I think that's a great idea," replied Sam.  "See you both.”

Bucky put his phone back in his pocket and stood up.  "How do you feel about pizza for dinner?" he asked.  "It's been a while."

"Loaded but no onions," said Rebecca with a smile.

"You got it," he replied, and searched his phone for the nearest pizza place, ordering two large loaded pizzas, no onions.  "You want a beer with that?  I could run out quickly and get some before they deliver."

"Sure," she answered.  "Leave me some money in case they come early."

He pulled out enough cash for her and headed out to get some cold beer, a two block run.  Quickly grabbing a six pack he brought it up to the cash register, noticing the cashier's face was red with some tear tracks.  She didn't make eye contact with him and he could feel his senses go on full alert.  Calming himself he listened for her heartbeat realizing it was pounding away.  What was more, there was another heartbeat, from under the counter in front of her.

"Hey, do you have any of those, what do you call them, coolers?" he asked, then he pointed below the counter and gave her a thumbs down.  "I looked but I couldn't find what I wanted.  Do you think you have more in back?"

She nodded and moved to help him when he saw the tip of a sawed off shotgun coming up from below.  Quicker than anyone could react Bucky grabbed the muzzle, yanking it up and out of the robber's hands, pulling him up with it.  The man grabbed the girl while holding a knife in his other hand but Bucky cocked the shotgun and placed it against the man's neck, using his left hand so he didn't get his fingerprints on it.

"I can fire this before you take your next breath," said Bucky.  "Put the knife on the counter and let her go." The man did as he was told and Bucky looked at the woman.  "You okay?  Go ahead and call the police.  He's not going anywhere."

She phoned the police then came around to Bucky.  He put his arm around her shoulder as she began to cry.  Keeping his eye on the robber Bucky tried to calm her.

"You'll be okay," he said.  "I've dealt with assholes like this before.  They're cowards."

"Thank you," she said, as her sobs subsided.  "I thought he would kill me.  Three other people came in and said nothing.  Just bought their stuff and left."

"Well, I'm not them, am I," stated Bucky.  They could hear the sirens get closer.  "Police are almost here."  He looked at the guy.  "Get down on the floor and put your hands behind your head.  Do it, before my trigger finger twitches.”

The man did as he was told and Bucky put the gun on the counter beside the knife.  When the police arrived he pointed to the man on the ground.  Quickly he told them his name and what he did.

"Listen, I've left my sister alone at the house," he said.  "She's in a wheelchair and isn't supposed to be on her own for too long.  Can you come and take my statement there?  She's probably wondering where I am as I was only supposed to be here a few minutes."

Bucky showed them his driver's licence to confirm his address and the officer said he could go.  The girl hugged him then gave him his six pack in thanks.  He ran back home and found the pizza delivery guy sitting in the living room with Rebecca, chatting.

"Here he is," she said.  "What took you so long?  I didn't have enough money.  I need another eight dollars"

"Sorry," said Bucky, pulling out a ten dollar bill and handing it to the man.  "Would you believe the store was being robbed?  Poor kid at the till was terrified.  The police are coming here to take my statement."

The man looked at the ten dollars and pushed it back to Bucky.  "Keep it.  If you stopped a robbery I can cover the rest of bill."

"No, I couldn't ask that of you," said Bucky.  "Pay it forward.  I'm good."

The man nodded and left.  Bucky took the pizzas into the kitchen, getting some plates out.  He put two pieces on a plate for Rebecca and brought it out with a beer.  Then he put four pieces on his plate and opened a beer for himself.  Just as he sat down the doorbell rang and he opened it to the policeman who came to take his statement.  As Rebecca sat and beamed at her brother he told the officer what happened.  After Bucky signed off on his statement the officer stood up and offered Bucky his hand.

"I heard of you when you were the Winter Soldier," he said.  "I was on duty when you and Captain America took on those Flag Smashers.  You did good that night.  You did good today.  It's been an honour to meet you Mr. Barnes.  You're a good man."

Nodding at Rebecca the officer left and she ate her second piece of pizza, proud that her brother was Bucky Barnes.

Chapter 4>>

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[asma-al-husna]

Allah’s name Al-Lateef— The Subtle, The Most Gentle, The All-Kind— occurs seven times in the Quran. Al-Lateef is the One Who disposes of our affairs in the most beneficial way without us even perceiving it. He is Al-Lateef to His slave, being kind, gentle, and merciful, and He’s Al-Lateef of His slave; He’s fully aware of your situation, your deeds, what is in your heart, your thoughts, and your desires!

Most Kind, Most Subtle, the Gracious

Lateef comes from the root laam-Taa-faa, which points out to four main meanings. The first meaning is to be kind, gentle, mild, affectionate, soothing, and to bestow with kindness. The second main meaning is to be thin, delicate, and refined, and the third to be subtle and to know the details of all affairs. The fourth main meaning is to treat with regard for circumstances.

This root appears eight times in the Quran in two derived forms. Examples of these forms are walyatalattaf (and let him be cautious) and lateefun (is Most Subtle).

Linguistically, the concept of lutf refers to being so kind to someone that they don’t notice as well as something that’s too tiny or too subtle to be seen or felt. It also means to know secrets and minute details of things and to be able to do what others can’t do.  Al-Lateef refers to His infinite kindness and His complete knowledge, with which He bestows gifts and favours on us, taking us gently from one situation to another and causing us to benefit without us even knowing it.

Al-Lateef Himself says: Vision perceives Him not, but He perceives [all] vision; and He is the Subtle, the Acquainted. [Quran, 6:103]

The two main purposes of the universe

Allah subjected the whole universe to man for two main purposes, first, to help us know our Lord’s ultimate wisdom, might and power, and attributes, and second; to honour us by creating for us such a great universe.
For example, if you know Allah ‘azza wa jall by contemplating water, you grasp the major purpose of why water was created. But if you drink a glass of water just to quench your thirst and fail to contemplate it, you achieve only the minor purpose of its creation, which is to make use of it.

The examples of Al-Lateef are all around us; on hot summer days He makes fruit ripe for us while we’re heedless of it. He causes the teeth of young children to gently swap for permanent teeth without it causing them pain. Can you imagine a dentist removing even one tooth from a young child to make place for new ones? Al-Lateef lets situations flow smoothly from one into another.

Daily life guidance from Al-Lateef

Have you ever heard someone say something you just needed to hear, for no apparent reason? Have you ever attended a talk and the topic specifically addresses your problem? Have you ever had a class recommended to you from out of nowhere, that brings you closer to Allah? Has anyone ever said that one word that lifts you up, reminding you of Allah ‘azza wa jall while they don’t even know what you’re going through? You might think it’s your friends comforting you, but it’s Allah Al-Lateef who sends you such friends.

Have you ever loved something that was displeasing to Allah and slowly just got “off” it to the point where you didn’t even know why you ever liked it in the first place? These are the ways of Al-Lateef, helping and guiding you in your life. As Al-Lateef Himself says: Allah is Subtle with His servants; He gives provisions to whom He wills. And He is the Powerful, the Exalted in Might. [Quran, 42:19]

How Can You Live by This Name?

1. Be gentle and kind to others.
As a way of being thankful to Al-Lateef for His gentleness, we should try our best to be a source of gentleness and kindness to others. Make a special effort to look out for the poor, orphans, widows, prisoners, and all those in need around you and to do something to make their lives easier. Give extra clothing, write a letter of support to a prisoner, etc. As the Prophet said: Show gentleness, for if gentleness is found in anything, it beautifies it and when it is taken out from anything it damages it. [Abu Dawud]

2. Reflect on yourself and your surroundings.
For example radio waves: they can’t be seen, but they bring about much benefit for us. The subtle air, which is not heavy to breathe, the change of the seasons, ripening fruits, the day flowing over into the night, the body and mind of a child developing in perfect milestones, people coming onto your path, an uplifting word at the right time, and events occurring out of nothing but with perfect wisdom— the ways of Al-Lateef can be found all around you. Take them all as opportunities to actively remember Him.

3. Grow your love and amazement for Al-Lateef.
Love Him and be grateful to Him, for He’s been kind to you in ways you don’t even realize. Al-Lateef may put you through things that you dislike, but be patient, and when He gives you what you love, be thankful for it. Say a lot of alhamdulillahs in your daily life, even for the things you don’t notice but that benefit you greatly. Say subhanAllah at any spare moment for His perfect ways to guide you through life.

4. Have the right intention in all you do.
Al-Lateef knows all you do, every minute detail, every thought, every desire, and every intention, so take account of yourself. Before you do anything, ask yourself: Am I really doing this for Allah or for something else?

5. Make dua for lutf.
Make dua to Al-Lateef, asking Him for His kindness and to aid you to be kind to others. Ask Al-Lateef for His blessings for your loved ones.

O Allah Al-Lateef, we know You are the most subtle and perceive every detail. Make us fear You as if we see You. Aid us to always be thankful for Your kindness and patient in hardships, make us of those who are kind and gentle to others, inspire us to contemplate your beautiful names and attributes by reflecting on the universe and all that’s in it instead of merely using it to satisfy our needs. Ameen!

[maukiki1-but-cringefail]

i swear to fucking god im not a hater but if i see another fucking badly-made thumbnail boring neurotypical straight guy with lame monotone voice talking over buncha mfb clips video of the worst metal fight beyblade takes ive ever seen with the unfunniest jokes im gonna rearrange the DNA sequence of the closest person to me to that of a Doto greenamyeri nudibranch because i swear to god just shut the fuck up.

how the fuck do you meatheads base how much you like a character over powerscaling and win ratio. would you prefer a wild bear over your own mother because the bear is stronger than her? thats how you fuckin sound like. i gotta rant this shit out because i had enough if i hear another fucking "ryūga da goat🥶🐐" "beyblade really is that serious🤣" "This show is so acoustic😵" "did you know that moses split the sea with a be-" WE FUCKING KNOW THE WHOLE WORLD KNOWS AT THIS POINT. ALSO IF YOU DEADASS USE AUTISM AS AN INSULT LET ALONE USE THE WORD ACOUSTIC OR ARTISTIC FOR IT STAY 7 KILOMETERS AWAY FROM ME AND ALSO DONT WATCH METAL FIGHT BEYBLADE EVERYONE IS GAY AND AUTISTIC YOU KNOW WHY⁉️ which cishet neurotypical out there makin spinning tops fight with neon green or blue whateverthefuck hair half the cast looks like they been hiding in closet before their debut episode.

PRIME example of these bad takes is , because of powerscaling again the hate on masamune ? i thought people hated him because they thought he was annoying (like how i did when i first watched it when i was little) (FOUR YRS OLD) and like id get that as in he talks alot or whatever but people hate him because. fucking. "he has a low win ratio and claims to be the number one blader" BITCH THATS A 15 YR OLD. or like around that age somewhere you get the point. so what if the taco doritos colour palette guy a little confident in himself bitch you hate fun you hate sillyness. people also use him as like a tool to praise kenta? constantly i see takes like "kenta is like masamune if masamune didnt suck" or something as in they both try to rise to the top and get stronger but one of them doesnt talk shit like did you know you can praise a character without putting down the other one motherfucker. another one is "masamune isnt a legendary blader because he talks shit but cant actually back it up" Hey my brother in Allah lets play a little game. which one of the fucking legendary bladers talks big about himself. you have ten seconds. 10...9...8....KING. KING IS RIGHT THERE .

also saw someone say damian shouldve been a legendary blader⁉️⁉️mf that boy was on rearrangement stereoids the effects of that wouldve already worn off by the time of metal fury how does that even WORKK😭😭 he was probably off with 3 big fucking pet dogs to eat custard pudding or sumn idk .Ryūga dickriding has been a thing for for ever but right now for some reason people decided they didnt talk about that guy enough. theres so many videos on him guys there are other characters to talk about i can write a three billion word essay on damian but i dont think i can say anything about ryūga that hasnt been said at this point. also the people who claim hes alive BECAUSE hes alive in the manga is crazy like yall cant see those as two different universes? im not saying wether if i think hes alive or not this isnt about that dont miss the point. i wanted to make text posts about mfb for forever but i was embarrased for god knows why so i just posted my mfb fanart on my main but i cant take it anymore (eatina burger with no honey mustard) must speak this time im afraid

also sorry if this is hard to read im not good at ending sentences where i should punctuation jumpscare. powerscaling mfs will hear u say u like a character like for example tsubasa or sumn and immediately bring up ryūga like shut the fuck up this shit happened on twitter i dont even use twitter i opened the app for 000.1 seconds. you just jelaous ryūga will never serve like did mf also im not a ryūga hater anyways i reached the character limit fuck

[revert-and-queer]

i have a very strange relationship with rules and "shoulds" in religion.

as im finding my way in islam, i am being very careful about what i internalize and what i do not. i've learned over the years of looking at religion how i avoid getting hurt by it, but by no means is it perfect. i've learned not to accept any human interpretation that does not serve me well. i will use it as a guide, of course, but in the end i disregard what doesn't suit me.

on one hand, i sometimes fear i am "selfish" for this or like i am bending religion to suit me. on the other hand... so what. allah knows my heart, knows my intentions. i trust that if he is there like i hope he is and like i feel he is, he is the perfect judge and the most merciful.

when i was agnostic and a friend told me she was converting to christianity, i told her to view it in the long run as a source of comfort. to toss aside anything that hurts her. i am trying to apply the same logic here.

if right now, due to my trauma and due to my mental illnesses, i can not do certain things, allah knows and understands. he knows i am doing my best. if i can't make salah every day, if the best i can do is duaa, he knows that i am trying to reach out in the best way i can. allah does not burden anyone with more than what they are capable of.

if my memory issues cause me to forget things, to only recall in hindsight i should say "bismillah", he knows it is not out of malice. instead, i praise him whenever i remember. i thank him for my blessings, for my cats, my partner, the beauty of nature. he comes to my mind naturally in moments of joy and beauty. isn't that wonderful? isn't it wonderful to see your creator in all that is good?

i heard someone say once it is more important to focus on doing things right than not doing things wrong, and i think a healthy relationship with religion needs that. no one can perfectly follow the rules and doctrine of any faith. as a muslim, i strive towards these things, but i am human and flawed. rather than freezing over what i can't do, rather than hiding in shame because i couldn't do this or that perfectly, i bring him what i can. i show him my efforts and what i can do, i do as much as i am able. inshallah that is enough.

[arif786]

Nobody can remove hurt except Allah SWT. Even if someone tries to cause you any hurt, stay firm in your belief and remember that no one can cause you any pain if Allah does not desire it for you.

And if Allah touches you with hurt, there is none who can remove it but He; and if He intends any good for you, there is none who can keep back His favour; He brings it to whom He pleases of His servants; and He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.