#Hi decaf lesbian

[born-in-hell]

Hi!

As some of you might know, southern Brazil, specifically the state of Rio Grande do Sul, has been struck by heavy rains and a consequential flood. The rains started on monday (29/abr) and only stopped today (5/mai), in Porto Alegre ─ the state capital, and the city i live in ─ and in the other cities nearby.

The lake that borders PoA (named Guaíba) has reached more than 5m up its normal level. This is higher than on the historic 1941 flood. The city's center ─ a big residential and commercial hub, beyond being the host of most of our public services (such as the city hall and the state government) ─ is completely taken by the water. Many other neighbourhoods were also affected.

Smaller cities that also border Guaíba were even more heavily affected, such as Eldorado do Sul, whose territory was almost 100% flooded.

The state is, for a lack of a better word, abandoned by the people that were supposed to aid.

Our governor, Eduardo Leite, is more worried about his plitical campaign ─ making dramatic videos, changing his facebook pfp to one of him with a public defense vest, making streams with no useful information ─ than with the people's lives. This year, he destinated only R$50.000 (~ USD250.000) for the Civil Defense. For the entire year. He is now, delegating the responsibility of recuperating our state to the Federal Government, stating that "the rbuilding of the RS will demand a Marshall Project".

Porto Alegre's mayor, Sebastião Mello, has vanished. He sold our city out to big enterprises ─ Melnick, Zaffari and Panvel, mainly ─, and hasn't destined any public resources to maintaining the Mauá wall (a wall built after the 1941 flood with a system made to protect the city from other floods), which caused many points to fail and the water to invade the city.

This is the danger we all face with a neoliberal system.

Neoliberalism is an individualist ideology. All these people and companies I named did close to nothing to help us. Or even made it worse. The Civil Defense, for example, published a map of all the areas that would be affected, but had to take it back, since it didn't consider the topography.

Its the people for the people.

This situation is being aided by people using their own resources. Donations of various natures and volunteer work. It is very beautiful, in a way. It shows that colaboration and union can do great things. It shows, at least to me, that the world can reach, one day, a self sustaining way of living, contrary to the ultra-individualistic capitalism some preach. Humans can, and are, good.

But it also lays out how much the people that govern us failed us.

Human lives were lost because of their negligency.

This flood isn't normal. It is a product of the huge levels of degradation multi-billionaire companies are causing the world, supported by higher class and their representatives. Eduardo Leite changed almost 500 points of our state's Environmental Code, for the worst, when he was first elected in 2019. His actions, and the actions of all other neoliberal politicians, such as our ex-president Bolsonaro, are what created this situation. They are responsible for everything that is going on here.

This flood isnt the only environmental crisis this state has faced in the last 6 months. This isn't the last one that will happen.

This text is, beyond a personal vent, a warning. We need to keep fighting against a system that is actively trying to kill us. Please, do not support ideals and people ─ especially if said people will rule you ─ that go against the environment, that preach that the capital, the money, the posesions, are more important than lives. Of the people, of the animals, of the environment. Fight for a better world, i know there can be one.

Always be aware of the climate in your areas. Things like this won't happen only here. Please be safe.

Sorry for the long post.

If you're interested in donating, @decaf-lesbian made this post with some links for international and national donations.

-> If you're from Brasil, check this link, that has a copilation of maps of risk areas, shelters, places to donate to, etc, made by a UFRGS student.

[howlinchickhowl]

It's day four and we're posting up early today because a gal's gotta work tonight. As usual thank you @gallavichthings for this fun list of prompts and for putting this all together.

To Sir, With Love four - teachers

The teacher’s lounge is like a time capsule, set in resin in the late ‘70s and never changed a day since. There’s something kind of comforting about it.

The whole neighborhood has changed so much the last few years, housing developers and rich lesbians and ‘young professionals’ transforming the bleak streets of his youth into lush green pastures and driving up the price of every single fucking thing. The price of beer at the corner store by his apartment is fucking insane, and if he wants to eat a vegetable every once in a while he practically has to take out a loan.

The teacher’s lounge though, that can always be relied on to look and feel and smell exactly the same as the day before, and the day before that, and the day before that. Piles of papers stacked high on every surface, a collection of typewriters and ash-trays in the corner by the microwave, remnants of a bygone era, the disposal of which seems to be nobody’s job. The faded sparkles in the stained linoleum that try valiantly to glimmer, the stale but sustaining aroma of years of coffee brews and spills and stains. Day in, day out, exactly the same.

Not today.

Today there’s a new smell. Not wholly new, but different. The rich aroma hits him in the face right as he opens the door and he stops short.

“The fuck’s that smell?” He asks the room, already quietly bustling with the regular crowd of overtired public school teachers he calls co-workers.

“Good morning Mickey”

Ian Gallagher, fresh-faced and too fucking smiley for this ungodly hour of the morning greets him from over by the coffee station, clutching his favorite mug in both hands like he’s a fucking teenage girl. He brought the mug from home, it’s got pictures of a bunch of kids on it, his family, he told Mickey once at the start of the year. Weird kinda family, two redheads, two brunettes, some guy who looks like a fuckin’ rat and a little black kid, probably about twenty years between all of them Mickey’d guess. He’s never asked.

Gallagher’s a new hire, fresh out of qualification at the start of the year and clearly overjoyed to be here, shaping young minds or whatever. Mickey knows he’s got at most a whole school year of feeling that way before the fucking grind of it starts to get to him. Too many kids and not enough money and no resources and a senior staff so apathetic that there’s no hope of anything ever getting better.

Normally he finds the fresh meat irritating, they’re too friendly, too enthusiastic, he gives them a wide berth and waits for them to learn, or to burn out.

Something about Gallagher though, sweet-natured and keen but not naïve or over the top, he’s kind of hoping that this one will survive.

Helps that he’s easy on the eyes. Bright red hair, pale, freckled skin, calm green eyes and the body of a fuckin’ cross-fit dad. Mickey doesn’t hate to look at him, wouldn’t hate being tossed around by him neither if it came to that but he doesn’t have a good read on the guy yet. They’re friendly, kind of. As friendly as Mickey ever is with a colleague. Maybe a little more. He likes talking to the guy. Likes looking at him.

“Gallagher.” He replies by way of a hello. His question about the smell still hasn’t been answered. “Why does it smell weird in here?”

Gallagher smiles, a sweet little thing that speaks of a giddy kind of smugness.

“I changed the coffee. Do you want some?”

It’s not that Mickey was attached to the old stuff, it was basically watered-down tar at it’s very best, but it was at least familiar. The devil he knew. And there’s no telling what kind of hair-brained scheme Gallagher might have replaced it with.

“It’s not fuckin’ decaf is it?”

That gets him a warm little chuckle and a friendly eye-roll.

“No, Mickey I would never do that to you. It’s just different. The stuff we had ran out and there was some disagreement over whose turn it was to go and buy it and it was fucking awful anyway and I saw an opportunity. I got us a subscription.”

“A subscription?”

“Yeah! The finest blends, delivered straight to our door. And all the proceeds go towards supporting women’s healthcare in Sierra Leone. Isn’t that cool?”

Is it cool? Mickey’s unclear exactly on why they should give a shit about helping people in Africe when there’s plenty of healthcare problems here at home, but if the coffee’s good he’s not exactly gonna kick up a fuss.

“Is it good?”

“What does your nose tell you?” Gallagher asks him with a tap to the nose, and Mickey rolls his eyes. The guy’s hot but he’s a fucking cheeseball.

It does smell pretty fucking good. It tastes pretty great as well, he has to admit when Ian passes him a cup, Mickey’s own favorite, not that he’d ever tell anyone he has a favorite. It sends a funny kind of warmth through him to think that Gallagher might just have noticed.

“It’s decent.” He admits, and Gallagher’s mouth opens to respond but there’s a knock on the door, and Mickey, being the closest faculty member to it, reluctantly turns to swing it open.

It’s a kid. Which makes sense, adults don’t normally knock, but it’s early still for kids to be in the building, even with extra-curriculars. He takes in the girl, he doesn’t know her. She’s skinny, reminds him of Mandy in her ripped black jeans and vintage band tee, kind of funny that kids are still dressing like that. She’s staring at him apprehensively, one hand still raised where she had been knocking.

“What?”

She looks taken aback by his brash question, a lot of the teachers are kinda soft with the kids, treat ‘em like babies. Not Mickey.

“Um. Is—Is Mr Gallagher here?”

“No.” He barks, and swings the door closed.

“Mickey!”

Gallagher’s face is incredulous, half a foot from his own where he had clearly been on his way to meet the student when Mickey had closed the door.

“What?” Mickey feigns innocence, and it gets him a laugh.

“I’m right here!”

“She doesn’t know that. It’s too early for kids, you ain’t even really workin’ yet.”

That much he’s right about, everyone gets in early but no one’s supposed to be working ‘til seven, and Gallagher would do well to learn a thing or two about boundaries. He’s got to learn to separate himself from the kids, take the time for himself. He doesn’t seem ready to hear that though, rolling his eyes, even though he’s still smiling.

“It might’ve been important. Who was it?”

Mickey shrugs, takes a gulp of his actually really fucking good coffee.

“I don’t know. Girl. Dark hair. Didn’t give a name.”

“You didn’t ask.” Gallagher fixes him with some attempt at a reprimanding look that Mickey has to duck his face into his mug to hide his response to.

“Eh I’m not your messaging service, alright.” He says once he’s got his grin under control.

“No you’re a fucking menace. Get out of the way, I’m gonna go find her.” Gallagher brushes past him, almost a full body check, really, that Mickey is certain wasn’t necessary. He grins into his coffee and goes to sit down, content to feel the ghost of Gallagher’s body up against his for the rest of the morning.

(btw the coffee subscription is a real thing run by the brothers Green, it's called Awesome Coffee Club and proceeds are donated to Partners In Health in Sierra Leone who are their long time charity partners.)

[prongsiess]

Once again, things my friends have said as incorrect marauders quotes:

James: we should get a hermit crab and call it Henry

Regulus, to Barty and Evan while doing his morning stretches: did you know that you live longer if you’re as flexible as a cat *winks*

Dorcas, looking at Reg zoning out looking at the gryffindor table: apparently cats think about marauders, not goldfish

Remus drunk off his rocker at a quidditch party, slurring his words: marauders for life man!

Peter, having a discussion with Marlene and Mary: I have the world’s most lesbian nails ever

James to Sirius in the Potters’ kitchen: of course not silly, Aslan (my hc name for the Potter’s gold retriever) can’t make dips!

James, showing off his shaved armpits to Marlene: it’s my little feminine trait, I don’t have armpits

Barty in care of magical creatures: hippogriffs are like speedbumps, the faster you run them over the less you feel them

Pandora, dead serious: I would kill Evan before I kill Reginald (my hc for the skittles’ pet snake)

Mary, to Sirius: just remember that I have a kitchen knife in my bag, I’m not kidding

Marlene: hey Minnie! You need to buy teenagers!

Sirius, discouraged that Remus doesn’t seem interested: NOOO I can’t have him but of course I can pick up old hags at madam pudifoots!

Peter: I am 99% banana and 1% wizard

Pandora, arguing with barty about Reginald: he doesn’t get constipated when I FEED HIM, I have magic fingers

Remus: Pompfrey’s my mum

Lily, standing behind Minnie with her arms crossed after Sirius just got detention: you’ve been Minnied

Mary consoling a first year after their first marauders prank: it’s okay the trauma will pass

Evan: my religion is pumpkin juice

Dorcas: me in the Great Hall on the morning that Reginald dies… “DEAR STUDENTS”-

Barty, literally unprompted: that child is postpartum

Marlene: Sirius, be honest, have you ever shoved a tampon up your ass?

Peter: it’s the peterphilia, the cult of my lawless village

Lily, dodging Marls, James, and Sirius trying to hug her after the won a match: do not fucking crust near me

Evan in herbology: if I put too many seeds will my plant overdose???

Remus close to a full moon: when I walk behind you I can smell your trail

Sirius: oh my god PENIS i’m freezing

Dorcas: not as if Barty can find the clit anyways

Regulus crying after he got less than an O: i’m not used to being stupid

Remus, talking about padfoot: I once saw him eat a squirrel and spit out its head

Sirius after any minor inconvenience: fuck school, fuck life, fuck this and someone please fuck me

James, sliding around the commonroom in his socks after accidentally having normal coffee instead of decaf: Lily move over I wanna drift the corner

Pandora: sorry i’m blonde, it’s not my fault!

James, after coming back from the slytherin common room: I’ve decided, slytherins are bipolar!

Sirius, scrutinizing themselves in the mirror: the more I think about it, the more I look like a rhinoceros

(These were all slightly changed to fit the context and some are translated from french as well, but the meanings stay true to the original)

[legolasghosty]

Hello my love! For the AU thing, what are your thoughts on an AU where the characters work at the mall, but at different shops? Where would they work? How would they meet?

- @michelangelinden

Hello!!!! Okay, I'm intrigued....

Okay, Luke would work in a music store, no questions there. Maybe a fun little out-of-the-way music shop that has a bunch of vintage stuff? Not usually super crowded, but pretty popular with those who know about it.

I kind of love the idea of Julie and Flynn running a wedding boutique together. Julie handles more of the up front stuff and the sewing, Flynn handles the business side. They make a good team and work with tons of different kinds of couples. They absolutely adore it when a lesbian couple comes in to dress shop together. It's adorable.

Willie would totally work at a boba place. I have no evidence for this, it's just what makes sense. They'd fit right in with the chill vibes, love mixing all the different kinds of drinks, and is definitely really good at making those funky bubble waffle things that I see at those places sometimes. He has to be careful about what kinds of drinks he gets for himself though, cause they have ADHD so them and caffeine is... not a good combo.

Because of this, plus the lack of noncaffeinated boba drinks(I know, I have a lot of friends that like going out for boba and there's like 3 things on the menu I can drink usually), Willie will often pop across the way to this sweet little coffee bar to get a drink, since it's easier to get decaf there. Noooo, it definitely doesn't have anything to do with the pretty, blond barista who has a really similar schedule to him. Or the fact that the barista, Alex, comes over to the boba shop sometimes on his break and will chat with Willie and he's really sweet and funny. Or the fact that they've memorized each other's usual drink orders and have started regularly swapping free coffee for free boba. Nope. Definitely wouldn't have anything to do with any of that....

Alex works in a coffee shop, one of those sweet, independent-type places where all the drinks have funny names and they have a billion kinds of milk. And he definitely doesn't have a crush on the boba-rista(something I literally saw on a job posting one time) who works across the way...

Reggie and Bobby work in a pet store together. Reggie was already the shift manager when Bobby started working there, and Bobby came in expecting some chill, older lady to be running things, so imagine his shock when he meets a literal ball of sunshine with more energy than the puppies that got brought in the day before. Reggie decides to make it his personal mission to coax a real smile(not a customer service smile) out of this new guy. Turns out, he has a really nice smile. And laugh. And he's also really cute when he stops putting up the stormcloud act all the time...

As far as meetings...

Julie and Flynn can't help but notice the mutual flirting going on between the guy that work at the coffee shop they go to on their breaks and the guy who works across the way. Eventually, they start conspiring to get them to actually go out. They are victorious, and gain two new friends out of the deal too!

Bobby becomes a regular at the boba place cause the chill vibe is a nice break from the frantic energy of the pet store. He usually ends up there during low rush times, since it's on his breaks, and so gets to chatting with Willie cause neither of them are really that busy. So when Willie ends up accidentally adopting the kitten that showed up outside of his apartment and doesn't seem to be leaving any time soon, they know exactly where to go for help.

Reggie actually isn't a huge fan of quiet, it makes him uncomfortable when things are super silent, so he found the little corner music store less than a week after he started working at the mall. He doesn't usually buy anything, but he and Luke become fast friends and start swapping mall gossip. And when Luke finds out he plays bass on the side, it's all over.

Eventually, Reggie drags Bobby into their little jam sessions too, since he plays guitar as well. And then Willie mentions to Bobby that their boyfriend(!!!), Alex, plays drums, so of course he has to come too. And then Alex finds out that Julie can sing and play piano, and it just becomes a lovely little jam party. They usually go to Julie's place, since she has a nice garage/studio to play in, and Willie and Flynn will join when they can as well. It's very chill and fun.

Yeah that was way more than 5, sorry...(not really).

Thanks for the ask boo!!!!!

[sttoru]

Hi! https://www.tumblr.com/decaf-lesbian/749476004536451072?source=share —> could you reblog this, please? It's very important!! Ty!

yes ofcourse !! 🙂‍↕️

[awyldepoetry]

Small and fragile things

Bitter black sips with Sara, 35 years my senior, she tells me about the building she bought back in Winnipeg in the 80s five lesbians in an old fire station, selling tickets to dances every weekend to make the rent and years later on the island, volunteering in the women's book store, the titles were so many she'd never seen how Never Again means handwritten letters to her representatives even now, a single handwritten letter is worth 1,000 emails, she tells me and maybe I will write her letters now, grateful to meet one who helped pave my way

Foamy cappuccino in the capital, stories from the homeland it's all mother tongue, bachata, the price of flour and rum my grandmother, hands with the same knots as mine, veins and tendons raised to the touch, and mine are still taking their time she tells me how she left, alone at seventeen in the middle of her engineering exam, just stopped, just picked up, just left to become free and how she sees that same searching, that same seeking, needing the freedom leading me

Water on the sidewalk outside of the bar the university students are in line still trying to get in, I meet young Ayla, her confidence reminds me of the version of myself that hadn't yet been told what to cut out to be allowed to fit in she studies music and climate science, remarks on the unlikely pair but I see it, I see how they mesh both ripping at the edges to make another living thing hold their truth, purpose, both begging for reality to be allowed in through the cracks underneath the door we don't recognize each other, don't need to and in a way that's the liberation

Decaf only these days, Alvin gives me a funny look when I ask for it in the morning at the donut shop We ride in the truck he's maybe driven all his life, and it looks it He looks at me funny when I order the non-alcoholic beer at the bar, too, but he still tells me how he spent his son's 21st birthday with him in a helicopter in Las Vegas Tells me about the advice he gave his young niece at her grandparents house, that someone who doesn't like her is none of her business, and not her problem

and I have a niece now, too I am here and alive, my two feet on the ground I am breathing the same air as these strange and miraculous beings sharing these moments, so tender and brief I am me, with all my own stories, and many to write I am me, I have a niece and aren’t we all such small, and fragile things

-

A. Wylde

April 10th, 2024 NaPoWriMo 09/30

[itsthemysterykids]

@artwritebeast

Coraline: Yeah, yeah we got it. No coffee, don’t let him cause trouble, and no puppy eyes.

Raz: We can handle it!

Dipper: You guys just literally gave him coffee while you were talking! *Takes mug away from Devon*

Raz: We’re not perfect, sue us.

Lili: Some day, but not today.

Devon: ‘Can I at least have decaf?’

Wybie: No… Maybe.

Devon: ‘Please?’ *Puppy eyes*

Norman: *Uses Lili as a shield* Everyone! Get behind Lili!

—

Devon: ‘Real talk man, they call you their mom and you don’t bat an eye?’

Wybie: No, not really. I started off as a joke, but then I just embraced it. It makes sense, I cook for them, patch up any injuries they have, and even do their hair sometimes. So… Mom friend.

Devon: … ‘Do you… Want some help with that?’

—

Neil: Lesbian moms!

Wybie: We’re not lesbians!

Devon: ‘Or married!’

Lili: Don’t care, I’m telling everyone I got two moms now.

Mabel: Let them interpret it how ever they wish!

[lets-just-daydream]

Masterlist - July 2020

DOOMFIST X READER

S/O who is the Talon commissar

Doomfist with touch-sensitive reader (NSFW)

Domestic HCs

GENJI X READER

Seeing S/O remove fake lashes for the first time ever

S/O has their glass heart in a lockbox

Comforting S/O whose family member is in hospital

S/O who is presumed dead is found alive

“Be you, no one else can.”

S/O with sensitive skin

Reactions to an S/O with SPD and ASD

Reaction to S/O who feels worthless

Genji is moving things a little too fast

Genji cheats on you and Hanzo saves the day

“Do you like it when I touch you like that?” and “You have no idea what you do to me”

S/O is a meme

“Open up” and “Good girl” (NSFW)

“Are you okay?” and “About the baby… it’s yours”

“No strings attached” NSFW

“I haven’t slept in four days” with nurse!S/O

Young!Genji in an arranged marriage with his best friend

Comforting S/O who’s insecure about weight and height HCs

Reactions to tiny reader in huge armour

Genji cheats on reader, Hanzo saves the day

Reader loves touching Genji HCs

Sick reader comes to a meeting

Genji and male reader’s first time (NSFW)

Genji’s reaction to S/O being afraid of the dark

Reader is Moira’s daughter and runs away after the Venice incident then reunites with Genji and McCree

Genji comforts sexually abused reader

Child comes out of the closet

Genji smut (NSFW)

HANZO X READER

Reader has a son who Hanzo adopts and they develop dragons

Seeing S/O remove fake lashes for the first time ever

“Are you hitting on me?”

S/O has their glass heart in a lockbox

With an S/O who has wings

Undercover kissing Avengers style

Hanzo’s dad sabotages your relationship

Hanzo confessing his love for chubby reader

Reader spends all day teasing Hanzo

Hanzo proposes to pregnant long time love

S/O who is presumed dead is found alive

“I didn’t think you could get any less romantic”

"You can't banish me! This is my bed too!" and "How is my wife more badass than me?"

Quiet S/O has to body slam a jerk

S/O with sensitive skin

Reaction to S/O who feels worthless

Reader is Moira’s prized experiment

A birthday surprise for Hanzo

Hanzo asks S/O to sing to him

Break-in

Genji cheats on you and Hanzo saves the day

Reader is afraid of Vampire!Hanzo

Reader is “initiated” into Okami!Hanzo’s pack

Learning languages

“I lost the baby”

“I hate you” and “Why do you hate me?”

“You’d be a great mother”

“If you’re bored; wanna have sex?” and “What did you just say?”

“Do you believe in ghosts?”

Comforting S/O who’s insecure about weight and height HCs

Young!Hanzo tries to win reader’s heart at a Dragon Festival

Reader walks into work with bruises on face and neck

Reader doesn’t take injury seriously

Powers like Polaris

Hanzo has a crush on McCree’s little sister

Genji cheats on reader, Hanzo saves the day

Quiet, insecure reader

Playing with Hanzo’s hair

College AU

Hanzo the ice-cream man

Hanzo spots your tattoo

McHanzo’s pregnant S/O

Skin Clouds (Soulmate Tattoo AU)

Reader cries because she finally belongs

Reader is obsessed with Hanzo’s tattoo

Blind fem!reader

Reader is accused of something they didn’t do

Child comes out of the closet

Scion Hanzo likes waitress reader

Reader breaks up with cheating Hanzo

Waking up next to Hanzo for the first time

Hanzo shows off for reader

“Babe”

JUNKRAT X READER

Reactions to S/O expecting a baby

Developing a crush on reader

Break-in

Kissing HCs

What it’s like being in a relationship

Trying to seduce crush

“Can I kiss you right now?”

Reader comforts crying Junkrat

Jealousy HCs

Junkrat falls in love with lesbian reader

Secretly strong fem!reader

Reader breaks up with cheating Junkrat

Self conscious chubby S/O HCs

Junkrat goes down on virgin fem!reader (NSFW)

LUCIO X READER

Injured S/O drabble

Reactions to S/O expecting a baby

Lucio comforts suicidal S/O

Reactions to tiny reader in huge armour

Quiet, insecure S/O

Playing with Lucio’s hair

When reader is made fun of, protective Lucio strikes

Reader learns to skate in Lucio’s skates

Reader changes her appearance and surprises Lucio

McCree walks in on reader and Lucio (NSFW)

MCCREE X READER

“Stop being so cute”

S/O brings a cute lunch and everyone is shook

Undercover kissing Avengers style

Reader and McCree reunite years after the fall

Comforting S/O whose family member is in hospital

S/O who is presumed dead is found alive

“I lost our baby”

“The ladies love a man who’s good with kids”

Quiet S/O has to body slam a jerk

Reactions to an S/O with SPD and ASD

Reaction to S/O who feels worthless

Reactions to S/O expecting a baby

Reader has huge wings

McCree gets blackmailed by Talon agent

Developing a crush on reader

Cuddle HCs

McCree saves abused reader

Injured S/O

Break-in

Anaemic reader

Kissing HCs

What it’s like being in a relationship

“I lost the baby”

McCree with a loud S/O sequel

McCree with a S/O who has violin hips

Trying to seduce crush

Reader and their S/O are caught sneaking around by McCree

“Can I touch you?”

Comforting S/O who’s insecure about height and weight HCs

McCree with touch-sensitive reader (NSFW)

McCree and reader are happy until a spy brainwashes him

Reader comforts crying McCree

McCree and D.Va swap bodies and reader confesses her love to the wrong person

Reactions to tiny reader in huge armour

Reader walks into work with bruises on face and neck

Jealousy HCs

Quiet, insecure reader

McCree likes lesbian reader

Playing with McCree’s hair

McHanzo’s pregnant S/O

Loud S/O comforted by McCree

Reader is Moira’s daughter and runs away after the Venice incident then reunites with McCree

Reader is Moira’s daughter and runs away ... part two

McCree comforts sexually abused reader

McCree walks in on reader and Lúcio (NSFW)

McCree helps bigger reader with anxiety and self-confidence

Reader is accused of something they didn’t do

Child comes out of the closet

Reader dies in McCree’s arms

Reader breaks up with cheating McCree

McCree comforts S/O going through phantom pain

Reader has a crush on McCree and he slept with someone else

Young reader with joint pain

Waking up next to McCree for the first time

McCree finds S/O after she showers (NSFW)

McCree cares for sick reader

REAPER X READER

Gabriel meets mermaid!reader

S/O has their glass heart in a lockbox

S/O brings a cute lunch and everyone is shook

Undercover kissing Avengers style

Busty S/O drabble

Reaper saves Reader from Talon fire

Injured S/O drabble

Comforting S/O whose family member is in hospital

Celebrating Prefall!Reaper’s birthday

Reader is turned into Reaper

S/O who is the Talon commissar

Reaction to S/O who feels worthless

S/O calls Reaper “boo”

Anaemic reader

Reader is basically a storage unit

“It’s lonely here without you”

“It’s lonely here without you” part two

Quiet, insecure reader

Waking up next to Gabe and he spots your tattoo

Convincing Reaper to leave Talon

Short fic of Gabe doesn’t love reader anymore

Reaper comforts sexually abused reader

HCs of Gabe doesn’t love reader anymore

Reader is accused of something they didn’t do

Reaper76 vampire AU

Reader has a crush on McCree and he slept with someone else

Gabe helps exhausted S/O

Gabe helps reader with body hate

Fluffy pre-fall Gabe

Reader has a self-harm relapse

Gabe doesn’t have time for games

REINHARDT X READER

Cuddle HCs

Reader walks into work with bruises on face and neck

Reader steps up to help Reinhardt with a flashback

Reinhardt helps reader catch her dog

ROADHOG X READER

Developing a crush on reader

Kissing HCs

What it’s like being in a relationship

Trying to seduce crush

Reader comforts crying Roadhog

Jealousy HCs

Waking up next to Roadhog and he spots your tattoo

Roadhog finds S/O after she showers (NSFW)

SOLDIER 76 X READER

Reader is turned into Reaper

Reader is Moira’s prized experiment

S/O switches coffee to decaf

Reader accepts her fate with Slasher76

Reader is basically a storage unit

Sick reader goes to meeting

Child comes out of the closet

Reader dies in Soldier 76′s arms

Pre-fall Soldier 76 helps reader catch her dog

Reaper76 vampire AU

Soldier 76 deals with annoying clients

Soldier 76 helps reader with body hate

Reader has self-harm relapse

ANA X READER

S/O builds Ana a mechanical bodyguard

“Mommy, could you please pass the salt?”

Fluff and kisses

BRIGITTE X READER

Argument before Brigitte leaves for mission

Injured S/O

Domestic HCs

“Shut up  and kiss me” and “Is that my shirt?”

Fluff and kisses

D.VA X READER

Reader would like to sponsor her work

Reactions to an S/O with SPD and ASD

Reaction to S/O who feels worthless

Noticing self-harm scars

S/O shapeshifts into D.Va

D.Va doesn’t feel the same way

S/O is a meme

D.Va with a S/O who is getting famous

D.Va introduces reader to Korean food

Reader loves touching D.Va

Fluff and kisses

D.Va cheats on reader

MEI X READER

Fluff and kisses

MERCY X READER

Helping reader quit vaping

“Welcome to fatherhood”

Reader would like to sponsor her work

S/O with sensitive skin

Sleepy and cuddly drabbles

S/O builds Mercy a mechanical bodyguard

Reader is turned into Reaper

Reaction to S/O who feels worthless

Noticing self-harm scars

Reader has huge wings

“Are you high…?”

“Mommy, could you please pass the salt?”

S/O switches coffee to decaf

Reader is basically a storage unit

Mercy with tied up reader

Reader loves touching Mercy

Sick reader comes to meeting

Mercy finds out she’s pregnant HCs

Fluff and kisses

Mercy cheats on reader

Mercy wakes up next to reader for the first time

Reader finds vampire Mercy drinking blood from a donor bag

MOIRA X READER

S/O brings a cute lunch and everyone is shook

S/O builds Moira a mechanical bodyguard

Learning S/O can shapeshift

Moira thinks rabbit!reader is self-aware

Moira reacts to crush almost dying

Reader is Moira’s daughter and runs away after the Venice incident then reunites with McCree

Reader is Moira’s daughter ... part two

Moira finds out she’s pregnant HCs

Fluff and kisses

S/O gets overwhelmed and cries

PHARAH X READER

Tracer sets you up on a date

Sleepy and cuddly drabbles

“Mommy, could you please pass the salt?”

Male S/O meets Pharah’s parents

Pharah and S/O fight before S/O faces death

Fluff and kisses

SOMBRA X READER

S/O can teleport

Clingy Sombra is jealous of S/O’s ex

Reader would like to sponsor her work

Sleepy and cuddly drabbles

S/O who is the Talon commissar

Reaction to S/O who feels worthless

Noticing self-harm scars

Reader has huge wings

S/O switches coffee to decaf

S/O shapeshifts into Sombra

S/O is a meme

Learning S/O can shapeshift

Moira thinks rabbit!reader is self-aware. Sombra thinks Moira is crazy

Sombra reacts to crush almost dying

Sombra and roommate finally kiss

Pregnancy HCs

Fluff and kisses

S/O gets overwhelmed and cries

SYMMETRA X READER

Fluff and kisses

TRACER X READER

Seeing S/O remove fake lashes for the first time ever

S/O can teleport

Reaction to S/O who feels worthless

Fluff and kisses

WIDOWMAKER X READER

S/O can teleport

Reader is Moira’s prized experiment

“Mommy, could you please pass the salt?”

Assassin reader defending Widowmaker

Learning S/O can shapeshift

Widowmaker shibari

Widowmaker reacts to crush almost dying

Widowmaker is bad at flirting

Widowmaker almost leaves reader for dead

Forest nymph/dryad reader discovers injured Widowmaker

Widowmaker finds out she’s pregnant

Fluff and kisses

S/O gets overwhelmed and cries

ZARYA X READER

Injured S/O

Domestic HCs

Zarya doesn’t know you can speak Russian

“Fuck me”

Fluff and kisses

Zarya cheats on reader

Zarya and fem!reader on first date

Reader is panicked and Zarya helps

[sadaveniren]

🎄 31 Days of Recs - @disgruntledkittenface 🎄

tell me what you need

“And a fresh cherry?” he asks, pinching his bottom lip between his fingers. He waits as Louis stares him down, his brow furrowing.

“No? What the fuck,” Louis rasps, looking bewildered.

 

coffeeshop AU based on this iconic prompt:

harry: can i please get a semi-iced half caramel half vanilla decaf latte with no foam using fresh almond milk with a small swirl of whipped cream covered in a pinch of cinnamon and a fresh cherry?

louis: ...no? what the fuck

Caught up in your love affair

Royal AU. Prince Harry announces his engagement to Louis Tomlinson in an interview with longtime friend and BBC host Nick Grimshaw. Inspired by Prince Harry and Meghan Markle.

You came into my life

When the Queer Eye cast and crew sweep into Louis’ small town and fire station to make over his best friend and coworker Liam, Louis’ carefully constructed walls start to fall down and he has to face his fears – and the only guy he’s ever been able to see a future with.

Mix it up and down my body

Harry and Louis use a blindfold for the first time. Girl Direction AU.

Please forgive me if my lips quake

Harry's pet cat wing-womans her into a date.

An honest mistake

Louis has ridden the elevator with his neighbor all week. The first time they speak, there’s a misunderstanding.

I must admit I thought I’d like to make you mine

Louis fell apart when her ex broke up with her and moved across the country. Just as she’s starting to move on, Zayn comes back to town for their mutual friends’ wedding – with a new girlfriend as her plus one.

Blindsided and scrambling to save face, Louis lets herself get talked into a fake relationship with her new friend Harry. Their arrangement makes Louis feel pathetic and embarrassed, but it’s only going to last a few weeks. She just has to get through the wedding – what could happen?

Dream lover

A Real Housewives of New York AU.

Pink like the paradise found

Harry's friends take her out to the local lesbian bar to celebrate after she comes out. They joke about getting her laid, but the way the hot bartender is looking at her makes her think it might actually happen.

Just one look (and I fell so hard)

Harry has wanted to go to the Shubert Theatre ever since he moved to New York and lucked into a rent-controlled apartment just outside of the Theatre District. When he finally gets his chance, he hopes the night can meet his sky-high expectations. But the last thing he could have expected was the man seated next to him.

[aaliyah-babe]

Pilot: Part One

Pairing: eventual joey x reader

authors note: i do not own anything from friends, all credit goes to their respective owners. feedback is always appreciated.

Feedback is the glue that holds my writing together!

the group of five sat in the coffee house, monica and pheobe on the long sofa with chandler on the arm of it, and then joey and y/n sitting on the chairs next to it, as monica explained her ‘not a date’ date,

“there’s nothing to tell! he’s just some guy i work with,” she explained,

“come on. you’re going out with the guy, there’s gotta be something wrong with him,” joey pushed her to tell him, which made y/n hit him on the back of his head,

“now, now, joseph. play nice,” she warned before turning to monica, “does he have twelve fingers?” she joked,

“so does he have a hump? a hump and a hairpiece?” chandler joked which made everyone laugh at his comment.

“wait, does he eat chalk?” pheobe asked, which made everyone stare at her in confusion, once she noticed the stares she explained her question, “just ‘cause i don’t want her to go through what i went through with carl- oh,” she sighed at the memory.

“okay, everybody relax. this is not even a date. it’s just two people going out to dinner and not having sex,” she said which made chandler speak up,

“sounds like a date to me,” he said which made everyone nod in agreement,

time had passed and they hadn’t left the coffee house, but moved seats, monica and chandler were still on the couch, pheobe was on the ground, joey was sat on the green chair, and y/n sat on joey’s lap.

“i’m standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and i realise i am totally.... naked,” chandler explained,

“oh yeah,” joey nodded, implying that he’s had that dream,

“i’ve had that dream,” monica laughed,

“then i look down, and there is a phone.... there,” chandler explained further.

“instead of?” joey questioned him,

“that’s right!” chandler yelled, which made everyone shake their heads no this time,

“cant say i’ve had that dream, bing,” y/n sighed,

“all of a sudden, the phone starts to ring. and it turns out it’s my mother, which is very, very weird because, she never calls me!” he said, making everyone laugh a little.

it was a while later and they were still in the coffee house, joey and y/n we’re talking,

“okay so if i win, you have to buy me a cookie,” y/n explained,

“yes, but if i win, you have to buy me a cookie,” he said holding out his hand,

she shook it before replying, “deal!”

“or you two could just eat the cookies chandler bought,” monica motioned to the plate of cookies, y/n and joey shared glances before reaching over and taking one each.

the coffee house doors opened and ross walked in, with a sad look on his face,

“hi,” he said sadly, and joey leant over to y/n,

“this guy says hello i wanna kill myself,” she pushed his head back to ross and the rest of them,

“are you okay, sweetie?” monica asked her brother,

“i just feel like someone reached down my throat, grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out my mouth and wrapped it around my neck,” he said walking over to chandler’s side of the room, where chandler raised his plate of cookies to him,

“cookie?”

“carol moved her stuff out today,” monica explained for ross,

“oh, i’m so sorry honey,” y/n said to him,

“let me get you some coffee,” monica said, getting up,

he thanked her before sitting down, pheobe immediately gasped, and started cleansing ross’s ora,

“no. oh, no. no, don’t!” he yelled at her, making her stop for a second, “stop cleansing my ora,” she continued anyway, “no just leave my ora alone,” making her stop ross said,

“i’ll be fine, all right? really, everyone. i hope she’ll be very happy,” ross lied,

“no you don’t,” monica said from the counter,

“no i don’t. to hell with her she left me,” ross declared,

joey shook his head before asking, “and you never knew she was a lesbian?”

“no. okay? why does everyone keep fixating on that?!” he asked angrily, “she didn’t know, how should i know?”

“sometimes i wish i was a lesbian,” chandler said, still focused on the paper, he looked up before realising, “did i say that out loud?”

“alright ross, look. you’re feeling a lot of pain right now. you’re angry, you’re hurting. can i tell you what the answer is?” joey asked him and he nodded, “strip joints!” he said which made mos of the group roll their eyes. “oh, come on. you’re single. have some hormones!”

“see, but i don’t want to be single, okay? i just, i just, i just wanna be married again,” he stuttered, just as he said those words a woman in a soaked wedding dress ran into the coffee house, frantically looking around.

“and i just want a million dollars!” chandler motioned to the door,

y/n noticed something about the girl, very farmiliar and she saw that monica noticed too, monica looked at y/n, “is that?” and y/n nodded excitedly, her and monica getting up,

“rachel?” they both asked,

“oh god, guys, hi!” she smiled looking at the two, she hugged them both before continuing, “i just went to tour building and you weren’t there and then this guy, with a big hammer told me that you might be here and you guys are! you are,” she hugged them again, before y/n walked back over to the couch couch,

“can i get you some coffee?” the woman behind the counter asked,

“decaf!” monica pointed at rachel before walking her over to the couch,

“okay, everybody this is rachel another lincoln high survivor,” monica introdouced everybody to her before she introdouced ross.

“and you remember my brother ross,” monica said in more of a question tone.

“sure!” she smiled, and held out her hand,

ross got up to shake it but when he did the umberella popped open, invading the space between them, making them jump.

rachel sat down, as if she isn’t wearing a wedding dress,

“so you want to tell us now?” monica asked her,

“or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids?” y/n laughed a little at her comment.

“oh, god. well, it started about a half an hour before the wedding. i was in this room where we were keeping all the presents, and i was looking at this gravy boat; this really gorgeous limoges gravy boat. when all of a sudden,” she started but the lady walked up with her coffe, “sweet and low?” rachel asked, the woman nodded so rachel continued.

“i realised that i was more turned on by this gravy boat than by barry! and then i got really freaked out and that’s when it hit me; how much barry looks like mr. potato head. you know? i mean, i always knew he looked farmiliar but.. anyway, i just had to get out of there and i started wondering, why am i doing this and who am i doing this for? so anyways i just didn’t know where to go and i know that you, you and i have drifted apart but you guys are the only people i knew that lived here in the city,” she said pointing at y/n then at monica,

“who wasn’t invited to the wedding?” monica asked her and y/n raised her eyebrows,

“oh, i was kind of hoping that would’nt be an issue,” she said.

they decided to head back to the apartment and watch some tv, while rachel was on the phone to her father.

on the tv was a spanish telenovela,

“so i’m guessing that she bought her the big pipe organ, and she’s really not happy about it,” monica guessed,

“daddy, i just. i can’t marry him. i’m sorry, i just don’t love him... well it matters to me!” rachel said to her father over the phone.

there was a woman on the stairs of the show and she was wearing pants that she should not have been wearing,

“oooh, she should not be wearing those pants.” chandler said,

“i say, push her down the stairs,” joey said and everybody started chanting,

“push her down the stairs! push her down the stairs! push her down the stairs!” and when the woman pushed the other woman down the stairs everybody cheered.

“come on daddy listen to me!” rachel said which made monica turn off the tv and everybody turned to her,

“it’s like all of my life, everyone has always told me, your a shoe. you’re a shoe, you’re a shoe, you’re a shoe! and then today i just stopped and said, what if i don’t want to be a shoe? what if i wanted to be a purse? or-or-or a hat?!” rachel frantically said, “no i don’t want you to buy me a hat, i’m saying i am a hat- it’s a metaphor daddy!” she yelled into the phone,

“you can see where you have trouble,” ross said walking back and sitting down next to y/n.

“look daddy, it’s my life. well, maybe i’ll just stay here with monica!” rachel yelled into the phone and everybody turned to monica,

“so i guess we’ve established she’s staying here with monica,” monica said, and everybody turned back to rachel,

“well maybe that’s my decision. well maybe i don’t need your money. wait, wait! i said maybe!” rachel yelled before placing the phone down, her father had hung up on her.

the guys were in the kitchen while the girls sat in the living room with rachel, who had a brown paper bag over her mouth to calm her down,

“okay, just breathe. that’s it,” monica soothed her,

“don’t worry rach, just keep breathing,” y/n told her,

“just try to think of nice calm things,” monica told her,

“raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens, doorbells and sleigh bells, and- something with mittens, la la la something with string, these are a few...” pheobe began singing, poorly when rachel cut her off.

“i’m all better now,” rachel told her, making her stop singing and smile,

pheobe turned around and faced the guys, “i helped!” she smiled.

“okay, look, this is probably for the best, you know?” monica asked her, motioning for y/n to help her,

“yeah! independence, taking control of your life,” y/n side-hugged rachel.

“and hey, you need anything you can always come to joey,” joey said, putting his hand on rachel’s shoulder, “me and chandler live right across the hall, and he’s away a lot.”

“joey!” y/n hit him on his arm,

“joey stop hitting on her, it’s her wedding day!” monica reminded him,

“what? like there’s a rule or something?” he said.

the intercon buzzed so chandler checked who it was, “please don’t do that again it’s a horrible sound,”

“uh, it’s-it’s paul!” paul shouted through the speaker,

“buzz him in!” monica told him and he did,

“who’s paul?” joey asked her,

“‘paul the wine guy’ paul?” ross asked from behind her,

“maybe,” monica smirked,

“wait- so this whole time your ‘not a date’ date was with paul the wine guy?!” y/n screeeched excitedly,

“he finally asked you out?” ross asked her,

“yes!” monica exclaimed,

“ooh this is a ‘dear diary’ moment,” chandler joked,

“i can’t believe this!” y/n said excitedly,

“wait- rach, i can cancel,” monica said to rachel,

“please, no, go! i’ll be fine,” rachel insisted and monica turned to ross,

“ross, are you okay? i mean, do you want me to stay?” monica asked him,

“that’d be good,” ross said,

“really?!” monica and y/n said,

“no! go on! it’s paul the wine guy!” ross exclaimed, and right on cue, paul knocked on the door,

she opened it and said, “hi! come in,”

he walked in and everybody stood watching him, “paul, this is... everybody,” monica introdouced,

“everybody this is paul,” monica then turned back to paul,

“paul the wine guy!” everyone yelled,

“i’m sorry, i didn’t catch your name. paul, was it?” chandler asked him,

“sit down, i’ll be two seconds,” monica said running into her room,

y/n, joey and chandler went to sit down with paul,

“so paul, long time no see huh?” joey asked him,

“you’ve never met me before,” paul said making y/n and chandler laugh a little,

“right,” joey said embarrassed,

“so, how’s working in the restaurant?” y/n asked him,

“good, it’s uh, it’s good,” he stuttered,

it went silent and awkward until joey pulled y/n away, leaving chandler on the couch,

“what’s up, joey?” she asked him,

“nothing, just didn’t want to be there for any longer,” he told her, handing her a beer,

they stayed in the kitchen as ross talked to rachel, before chandler joined them,

“anyway, if you don’t feel like being alone tonight, joey and chandler are helping me put together my new furniture,” ross said to rachel,

“yes and we’re very excited about it,” chandler sneered,

“thanks, but i think i’m just going to hang out here tonight, it’s been a long day,” she said walking to the bathroom,

“hey, pheebs? you wanna help?” joey asked her,

“i wish i could but, i don’t want to,” she said which made y/n laugh,

“y/n/n, what about you huh?” joey asked her, squeezing her shoulder,

“meh, okay i guess, but i got to leave early though, because i got these new bath salts i want to try,” she smiled

“can we join you, or...” chandler joked, and she laughed, pushing him away,

it was later on and the guys and y/n had headed off to ross’ apartment, and started putting the furniture together, which was not working out so well,

“i’ve finished with the bedside table,” y/n told ross and everyone looked at her with their mouth open, as they were not close to being finished,

“okay, great! thank you! go take it in that room, please,” ross told her and she nodded, walking into the bedroom, she placed the table next to a bed, probably ross’ bed.

she walked back out, “anyone need any help?” she asked them and instantly, three arms flew into the air,

“okay...” she walked to ross since joey and chandler were working together,

“so what are we doing?” y/n asked him,

“well, i’m supposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little worm guys. i have no brackety thing, i see no worm guys whatsoever, and i can not feel my legs,” he said standing up,

ross walked over to the kitchen and y/n joined chandler and joey,

“what’s this?” y/n picked up a piece that wasn’t on the bookcase,

“i have no idea,” chandler told her, while joey shook his head and shrugged,

joey grabbed it off her and tossed it into the plant pot before shouting, “done with the bookcase!”

ross walked in sadly, holding a canned beer, “this was carol’s favourite beer,” he told them,

they looked at eachother, before looking back at ross, “she always drank it out of the can, i should’ve known,”

“hey! wait a second, i drink out of the can and i’m not a lesbian,” y/n said grabbing her beer, “see, look,”

she took a sip of her beer, from the can, after she finished she turned to joey and grabbed his face, pulling him in for a kiss, the kiss only lasted a few seconds before she pulled back,

“see!” she smiled at joey who was smiling happily at that,

“okay, uh ross, let me ask you a question.” joey started after he stopped smiling, “she got, the furniture. the stereo, the good tv. what did you get?” he asked him,

“you guys,” ross told them,

“you got screwed,” joey replied,

“not a good trade,” y/n said at the same time,

“oh my god!” chandler exclaimed.

“well kiddos, i’m going to head home, take that bath,” she said and saw chandler about to say something so she interrupted him, “alone!”

“let me walk you out,” joey said, walking with her,

they got outside of the apartment and joey closed the door, “well, that was... interesting,” joey smirked,

“oh joey! shut up!” y/n smiled at him,

“i’m just saying, you’re a good kisser!” he smiled at her,

“thank you, you are too,” she said.

joey called a cab and y/n got in it, waving at joey who started walking back to the apartments.

she got back to her apartment which was next to monica and rachel’s, before walking in.

she took her coat off and set it down on the kitchen chairs and got changed in her room, before watching tv.

there was a knock at her door, she got up and turned the tv off, opening the door to reveal rachel, a sad rachel,

“honey, come in,” y/n hugged her and she layed with her on the couch for a bit.

“want to talk about it?” y/n asked her and she shook her head no.

“well i’ve got something that might cheer you up,” y/n said running into her room,

she went into her closet and pulled out a black dress, that she didn’t like on herself, but knew it would suit rachel,

“i’ve had this dress for quite some time now, and it’s not my style, so here, take it,” y/n handed her the dress and rachel thanked her,

“oh it’s beautiful, thank you so much y/n/n!” rachel hugged her greatfully.

it was later on and rachel had went back to her apartment and y/n had decided to go to sleep.

read Part Two here!

[thatoneloser-kid]

Can I please request Ellie surprising Aster by showing up at Aster’s first big art showing for Art school please?

She and Aster hadn't talked much at all over the past two years. There was the odd message over the holidays, birthdays, but other than that there wasn't much. 

Aster never came home after her first summer, word quickly spread that she was dating a girl at college, and as much as that hurt, Ellie was proud of her, happy for her, even. 

She and Paul still talked every day, which is why it wasn't odd for him to call her at ten pm on a Wednesday. 

"Hey," Ellie murmured, her eyes not leaving her paper. 

"Hey," Paul greeted. "Okay, so I know I'm not good at romance or nothing like that, but I have an idea."

That got Ellie's full attention. "What?" 

"Aster has an art show in a small church thing for a project." Paul said. "You should go."

"Paul, I have papers to finish."

"I know you've finished them, and proof read them a million and two times." Paul shot back, and Ellie couldn't really argue, he knew her too well. "She is in Michigan, it isn't far, the train is a little under a day. Ten hours or something."

"I don't know, Paul." She said thoughtfully. 

"Bold, remember?" Ellie could hear the huge smile in his voice. "Come on, El. You've told me about soulmates and stuff, and the greeks, maybe Aster is your greek… or whatever."

"That's-" Ellie smoothed her fingers over her forehead, deciding against correcting him. "Close enough, well done, Paul."

"Thank you," Paul said. "So? Will you go?"

"I don't know," Ellie sighed. "What if she doesn't want to see me, Paul?" 

"You won't know for sure unless you go." Paul urged. "Come, El. Take the jump."

"Plunge," Ellie corrected absentmindedly. "Fine, okay. When is it?" 

"Yes," Paul cheered, Ellie knew he fist pumped, too. "I already emailed you the ticket, don't worry, it was free."

"Free?"

"Mm, I think they needed numbers or something, but you can buy paintings. It said on the Facebook page that the money goes to the art department at the school or whatever."

Paul sent her comforting and hype messages throughout the day she was traveling, which was surprisingly helpful, especially when she looked at herself in the mirror of the seedy motel she was staying in, dressed in a pair of black slacks and a black jacket to match, a simple white shirt underneath. 

"Is it too much?" 

"No, you look so good!" Paul assured. "Besides, I read that lesbians love girls that wear suits and stuff."

"You don't even know if she's gay or not."

"She's a little gay," Paul said, just before the phone tumbled from his hands and into the food he was making. Her curses as he scrambled to get it, and Ellie could hear his mother scold him for it. "Sorry mom." he called as he reappeared, that big smile still in place. "You look good, El. College has been good to you, you've gotten more attractive."

They had gotten over the awkwardness of Paul claiming he loved her. Turns out, he did, but not in the way he thought, having misinterpreted best friend love with romantic love. 

"Thanks, dude."

"Sure," He smiled. "Go sweep her off her feet, Princess Charming."

Ellie scoffed. "I'm not charming."

"Aster is certainly charmed by you." he disagreed, but before she could question him his mother was telling him to get a move on. "Gotta go, El. Let me know how it goes!" 

--

She had been there for half an hour and still hadn't seen Aster. 

It was busy, so she wasn't really surprised, she just spent the night strolling around the church, looking at the paintings, stopping at one of the larger paintings. 

She recognised it immediately, a painting of the graffiti she and Aster had made back home.

It was a little more abstract than the actual thing (Ellie would know, she had taken a picture of it when it was finished, it may or may not be her laptop background), and had the silhouette of two people standing in front of it. 

Ellie loved it more like this. 

"What do you think?" A voice asked somewhere to her left. 

"It's… amazing. They all are." Ellie said, her eyes not leaving the painting. 

"It's my favourite." they said, and Ellie turned to look at them, blinking in surprise when her eyes landed on Aster, who was wearing that stupidly charming half smile. "Brings back happy memories." 

"Uh, yeah." Ellie murmured, cursing herself because she practiced this, what she would say when they met again. 

"What're you doing here, Ellie?" Aster asked, no sense of malice in her voice, just curiosity. 

"I, uh- Your art show, I wanted to- Paul called and told me about it, said it would be romantic if I came, or whatever." Ellie could feel herself starting to blush, especially when Aster's smile grew mischievous. 

"Romantic, huh?" she took a few, slow steps toward Ellie, until she was stood directly in front of her, fingering the lapels of her jacket. "You look good, Ellie."

"So do you," And she did, dressed in a pretty green dress, her hair shorter than Ellie remembered. 

"Thank you," Aster smiled, dropping her hands but not moving out of Ellie's space. "How have you been, Ellie?" 

"Good, I have finished all of my school work, I think I'm ready for exams. I can't wait to get home for the summer." Ellie answered. "You?" 

"Really good, getting out of that town, I feeling I- I just -" 

"Like you can breathe." Ellie whispered, and Aster gave her that soft smile she had given her that day in the bathroom. 

"Yeah," Aster breathed. "Exactly."

They stared at each other, Aster with a soft smile and Ellie probably looking like a dumbstruck loser. 

"Aster," a hand clapped onto the girl's shoulder, and Ellie quickly looked away, taking a step back as she pushed her glasses up her nose. "Someone wants to speak to you before buying a painting."

"Of course, professor." Aster nodded, "I will be right there."

He nodded, eyeing Ellie briefly before leaving. 

"Hey," Aster reached out to take a hold of her hand, giving it a squeeze. "Will you stay? It is almost over."

"Of course."

Aster beamed at her, and Ellie swooned. "Great, have fun."

Aster disappeared, and Ellie quickly pulled out her phone to call Paul. 

"Hey, have you seen her yet?" 

"Dude, I was a mess." Ellie sighed. 

"You at your messiest is still so much better than me at my best, and she went on two days with me. You'll be fine." Paul assured. 

That was oddly comforting, in a way only Paul could be. 

Ellie strolled around the room until it started to empty, then Aster found her again.

"These are the keys to my car, you can go wait inside while I clean up." Aster offered her keys. 

"I can help," Ellie offered. 

"Oh, you don't have to."

"I don't mind," 

Aster looked somewhat surprised, but nodded. "Okay, all of the paintings sold, so the people here will take care of that, but we need to put away the tables and stuff."

Ellie nodded, and followed Aster's lead, slipping off her jacket and setting it over a railing, rolling up her sleeves messily before helping up stuff away. 

It was fine, until Ellie realised that Aster kept staring at her, or glancing over at her, and she felt herself getting a little flustered. 

It was a little over half an hour before they clambered into Aster's old car. "That was amazing. Your paintings were amazing."

"Thank you," Aster looked down at her hands for a few seconds, before looking at her. "So you want to get coffee?" 

"It's nine pm."

"Decaf," Aster offered. "I know a cute little place, it's open late 'cause it serves alcohol."

Ellie nodded. "Okay," 

Aster smiled. "Okay."

The cafe was small, but cosy, with sofas as well as tables, and a fireplace crackling in the corner. It was empty, it was nine pm on a Monday after all, so she and Aster settled on the safe sofa beside the fire. 

"So, tell me everything." Aster probed, turning to face Ellie, tucking her leg under herself, which caused her knee to press into Ellie's thigh. 

Ellie told her about college, about the small group of friends she had made, about Paul and his actually very promising future with is dumb good concoctions. 

Ellie relaxed into it, and come mid night they were laughing and giggling with ease, like it was how they had always been. 

Aster dropped Ellie off at the motel after they were kicked out of the cafe as it was closing. 

They sat in silence for a short while before Aster spoke up. "When do you head back?" 

"I'm getting the six am train tomorrow."

Aster looked disappointed, chewing the inside of her cheek as she nodded. "Can I take you to the station?" 

"You don't have to," 

"I want to." Aster promised. "Pick you up at five."

Ellie nodded, pushing her glasses up her nose. "Five."

"Goodnight, Ellie Chu."

"Night, Aster Flores."

Ellie clambered out of the car, only getting a few steps away before Aster was calling after her. "Ellie?" 

"Mm?" Ellie turned to her, and Aster grinned cheekily at her.

"Did you find something to believe in?" 

Ellie nodded, somewhat thoughtfully. "Yeah. Myself."

That seemed to be better than Aster had hoped for, if that beaming smile was anything to go by. "You're amazing, Ellie."

Ellie didn't know what to say to that, nodding once awkwardly before waving and disappearing inside. 

Ellie didn't sleep much that night, too restless, her mind running wild with the events of the day.

Aster was outside bang on five, giving Ellie the one over as she smiled. 

"What?" Ellie asked, pulling the sleeves of her hoodie down over her hands self-consciously. 

"You look cute." Aster shrugged simply before driving off. "I think I'm going to come home this summer. Dad asked me to, I don't know if he wants to try and fix things."

"That’s good, right?”

“I’m hoping so, but we will just have to wait and see.” Aster shrugged. “I’m excited to be back, it has been so long.”

“Everything is the exact same.” Ellie said. “I’m trying to convince Paul to go for a scholarship in culinary school, but he said he couldn’t leave his family like that.”

“He’s too loyal, that guy.” Aster shook her head.

“I have applied for a whole bunch of scholarships for him for the new school year, and I’m going to talk to his family when I get home, to see if they could convince him to go.” Ellie said. “He is wasted in that town.”

“He dropped off a little cooler to my place the first summer I came home, ding dong ditched.” Aster laughed fondly. “Left a note apologising about everything that happened. It was his famous sausage tacos, they are really good.”

“I know, right?” Ellie said, fiddling with the sleeves of her hoodie as they pulled up outside the station. “You know we never wanted to hurt you, right?”

Aster shut off the car, chewing the inside of her cheek as she nodded slowly.

“I know you probably don’t want to hear it, but I didn’t get the chance to explain myself.”

Aster glanced at the clock on her dash. “You have twenty minutes before you should go inside.”

Ellie nodded, taking that as a go ahead to continue.

“It was only supposed to be one letter, Paul asked me to help because he was convinced he loved you, and you should have heard the first letter, Aster, it was awful, he talked about his dead grandma.” Ellie laughed, and Aster grinned softly. “The real reason I did it was because I’m stubborn and he challenged me, but I didn’t have a clue about love either.”

“So, you plagiarised Wim Wenders?” Aster arched an eyebrow at her.

“Exactly,” Ellie laughed. “But then you wrote back, and now you were challenging me, so I said to myself it would just be one more. It was just so easy to talk to you, I felt like we just clicked, even thought you thought I was Paul, I still felt special, somehow? I had your attention, you wanted to speak to me, and that made me feel so incredibly special, and it was hard to stop. I enjoyed just sitting in my booth, texting back and forth about really personal shit or what our favourite hand soaps were, it didn’t matter. I just enjoyed getting to know you. But i’m sorry that I did it how it did, and that I lied to you.”

“You know, I probably would have been just as happy had those letters been signed off by you.”

“No, you wouldn’t have. Maybe now, but back then, you weren’t ready back then.”

“Maybe not. But now? I wouldn’t want to get a letter signed from anyone else.” Aster gave a little smile. “And the kiss?”

Ellie flushed. “I just- I couldn’t leave without kissing you.”

“Not our kiss,” Aster smiled, her Ellie felt like her face was on fire “Between you and Paul.”

“Oh,” Ellie nodded. “That was Paul thinking he loved me. And he did, just not the way he thought, we are best friends. But that was nothing, we were never, like, making fun of you or anything. Honestly, we were both just enamoured by you.”

Aster nodded. “You know, back then I convinced myself that I was so mad because I was so jealous of you.” She laughed softly. “I know now that’s not true, I was jealous of Paul.”

It took Ellie a stupid amount of time to realise what that meant, and when her head snapped to Aster, she was staring at her with a mischievous smirk.

“That I’m sure of now.”

“Yeah?” Ellie breathed.

“Yeah,” Aster’s smile softened. “But we still have two years of college left, we shouldn’t start anything when it is going to be long distance from the start.”

“That’s the only reason you wouldn’t want to start anything?” Ellie asked, peering up at Aster through her eyelashes as she pulled on her sleeve.

“Yeah,” Aster hummed, covering Ellie’s fidgeting hands. “If we were closer I would take you out tonight.”

“But we can’t?’

“No, not long distance, Ellie.” Aster said, and Ellie understood, agreed, even, but that didn’t make it suck any less. “Hey,” Aster whispered, bringing Ellie's eyes back to her. "What's a couple more years, right?" 

"Right," Ellie smiled. "I should go, you know it can take a while to get through the turnstiles."

"Of course." Aster agreed, leaning across the centre console to press a kiss to Ellie's cheek. "Text me when you get home?" 

"Sure," Ellie grabbed her hand and clambered out, trying and failing to hide how flustered she was. 

"Ellie?" Aster called, peering at her through the passenger side window. "Thank you, for coming. It was really good to see you."

"It was amazing." Ellie said. "Drive safe, Aster."

"Bye, Heathen."

Ellie found herself smiling at the nickname, giving a little wave as she headed inside. 

Paul called her just as she got on the train. "So? How was it?" he asked, and Ellie could tell his mouth was full of food. 

"It was really good, actually. She left me explain, and we hung out for a bit last night."

"Dope. So, are you guys, like, dating now?" 

"No, a couple more years."

Paul groaned loudly. "You guys are so weird."

[hollyharper]

For awhile, I’ve been working on some of my own stories. This is the half of the first Chapter to my novel: played into love. I will be making alterations, replaceing DC references with characters form my storyline: Legacy.

I login into my computer, just as the microwave beeps. I dodge around a metal support, and skip over a box of wires. I swing the microwave door open, and another yawn escapes. In the next cabinet, I feel around for a spoon. Savory, warm Ramen scent filled the room. I should clean up. I shake the notion away and start to stir my unhealthy dinner. I think about cleaning again, As I open a Coke. And a third time, as I dance around the mess, dinner in one hand, and an open soda in the other. Email is the last tab I use. The other five tempt me with names of comic series I haven’t finished reading. Half of the emails are ads. Hobby Lobby and Jonains are having sales. I glance at the billboard covered in cosplay designs. It would be a great time to pick up martials for my next cosplay, if I wasn’t tight on money. Half of my inbox is work related. One email pops out. It’s from Kate. Kate and I had grown up together. We went on vacation together, cosplayed together, read books together, and even moved to New York together. About a year ago, she had gotten her break as an actress and had to move to Hollywood for work. I missed her, but my robotics job keeps me too busy to visit. I open the email. A smile spread immediately. It’s an invitation to a massive comic convention in Chicago. Her boyfriend, Mark lives there. They were planning on going as Black Canary and Green Arrow, but now are doing the Birds of Prey. Kate knows I have a 2014 Batgirl cosplay. The email simply said, what hotel they were staying at and that we would be meeting two other cosplayers, who were coming as Nightwing and Huntress. I glance over at my cosplay rack. A purple leather sleeve sticks out. I want to go, but… I’m on a tight budget, and I don’t know these other two cosplayers. There are a hundred ways that could play out. Huntress could be mean and give me the silent treatment. She could be lesbian and like me. That sent tremors down my spine. Or she could be dating Nightwing and hate me because of some photo we take together. Nightwing could be snarky and awful to me. Or he could be fat with bad habits and hit on me. The image that pops into my head, ruins my dinner. A shirtless Nightwing, with skull tattoos over his chest, and cigarette breath, backing me into a wall, while Huntress glares wickedly. I set my roman aside, before I have a chance to puke on it. On the other hand, I haven’t seen Kate in months, and I’ve met Mark. Both of them are good people. But two strangers? Miles from home? That is a bit much. Still, I want to see Kate. If I drive, I can leave whenever I want. That eliminates the possibility of getting stuck around people I dislike. A quick google maps search reveals it would be a twelve hour drive. I’ve done longer, though not preferable, it’s not inmangeable. The two strangers still unnerve me. Kate would never put me in a bad situation. I remind myself. It’s true, but my imagination is still running wild. I type a response and hit send before I can talk myself back out of it. My reply is short: I’m in.

The hotel Kate had chosen was right across from the convention center. I park the car in the closest stop to the door. The moment my feet touch the ground I stretch. A large yawn escapes. Sluggishly, I unload my bags. I swing the backpack over my shoulder, slam the trunk close and drag my two suitcases towards the door. I check in as quickly as possible and finally lug my bags into my hotel room. The king bed calls my name, but I unpack anyway. The coffee maker calls my name. I fill a cup with water from the sink, and almost fall asleep on the counter. The firmerill sound and scent for brewing decaf coffee fills the room. I stack my clothes neatly in the provided drawers. The coffee machine continues to gurgle. The sound slowly disapates. It beeps, an jarring reminder to awaken. I waddle over. Decaf won’t give me much energy, but it's better than nothing. Another, bigger yawn escapes. I find the tv remote. It takes a little bit to find a good channel. I settle down for the final task of the day. I pull out my cosplay and run a final inspection on it. Thank God, I find no holes. Nothing was damaged during the growling thirteen hour trip. Satisfied that everything is ready for tomorrow, I climb under the covers.

[demigodsanswer]

Do you have any other AUs?

None that are written other than the Everyone Lives AU and the Ballet AU. But I would love to write a Friends AU for all my favorite minor and secondary characters (I haven’t, because it would just be me writing out the dialogue and scenario every episode of Friends with the names changed.) The cast would break down: 

Rachel: Silena 

Ross: Beckendorf (without all the Rossy-y-ness) 

Monica: Clarisse 

Chandler: Chris 

Phoebe: Lee

Joey: Pollux 

(might do more incorrect quotes along these lines tho)

And it would look like this: 

Title: So No One Told You Life Was Gonna Be This Way 

Chapter title: The One Where it All Began

“There’s nothing to tell,” Clarisse insisted. Her friends were sitting around her at the coffee shop, pressed in too close for her personal comfort, demanding details about her not-date tonight. 

“Come on,” Pollux said. “You’re going out with the guy, there’s gotta be something wrong with him.” 

Clarisse rolled her eyes. Sure, she didn’t have a great track-record with guys, but Paul was 1) nice and 2) it wasn’t a date. 

“So does he have a hump? A hump and hair piece?” Chris asked. He was perched on the arm of the couch. She easily could have pushed him over if she had the energy, but she had gotten so used to his sarcasm, she just tuned it out. 

“Wait, does he eat chalk?” Lee asked. Everyone turned to look at him, confused. “Just cause I don’t want her to go through what I went through with Carl.” 

“Everyone relax. Okay, this is not even a date. This is just two people going out to dinner and not having sex.” She said. 

“Sounds like a date to me.” Chris said. 

They wasted most weekend (and weekday) afternoons at the coffeehouse, chatting about nothing. 

“So, I’m back in high school, right?” Chris said, explaining his dream from the night before. “I’m standing in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realize I am totally naked.” 

Everyone groaned with empathy. 

“Then I look down, and I realize there is a phone ... there.” Chris said, gesturing towards his crotch. 

“Instead of ...” Pollux asked. 

“That’s right!” 

“Never had that dream.” Pollux said. 

“All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring.” Chris said. “And it turns out it’s my father, which is very, very weird because ... he never calls me.” 

Beckendorf, Chris’s college roommate and Clarisse’s cousin didn’t show up until it had started to rain. He walked into the coffeeshop wet, despite having an umbrella in his hand. 

“Hi,” he said in a miserable tone. 

“This guy says hello, and I want to kill myself.” Pollux said. Clarisse slapped his leg. 

“You okay?” Clarisse asked. 

He shook his head. “I feel like someone reached down my throat, pulled out my small intestine, and wrapped it around my neck.” 

“Cookie?” Chris asked, holding up a plate of snickerdoodles. 

“Miranda moved her stuff out today.” Clarisse explained. Everyone nodded in understanding. “Let me get you some coffee.” Clarisse offered, standing up. 

“Thanks.” Beckendorf sat on the couch next to Lee, who immediately recoiled. 

“Ew, oh.” He said, poking and pinching the air around Beckendorf’s head. 

“No, no, no, don’t, stop. Stop cleansing my ora.” Beckendorf told him. Lee started to protest, but Beckendorf shot back: “Just leave my ora alone, okay? I’ll be fine, alright. Really everyone, I hope she’ll be very happy.”

 “No you don’t.” Clarisse corrected, bringing him his coffee. 

“No I don’t,” he agreed, “to hell with her, she left me.” 

“And you never knew she was a lesbian?” Pollux asked. 

“No, okay? Why does everyone keep fixating on that? She didn’t know, how should I know?” 

“Sometime I wish I was a lesbian.” Chris said casually, not looking up from the magazine he was reading. When his friends stopped talking, he looked up, nervous. “Did I say that out loud?” 

“Alright, Beck, look,” Pollux said, “you’re feeling a lot of pain right now. You’re angry, you’re hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is?” Beckendorf nodded. “Strip join! Come on, you’re single, have some hormones!” 

“Okay, but see, I don’t want to be single.” Beckendorf told them. “I just want to be married again.” 

The door opened behind them, and everyone in the coffee shop turned in time to see a young, rained-on woman in wedding dress enter the shop. 

“And I just want a million dollars!” Chris yelled, holding his hand out to the door, sarcastically hoping it would produce his wish. 

Clarisse recognized the woman and stood up to speak to her. “SIlena?” She asked. 

Silena turned to her. “Oh, god, Clarisse! Hi!” Silena pulled her in for a hug. She was shaking and breathing heavily. “Thank god. I just went to your building, and you weren’t there, and then this guy with a big hammer said that you might be here, and you are, you are!” She was smiling wide and bouncing a little. She pulled Clarisse back into a hug. 

“Coffee?” The waitress asked. 

“Decaf.” Clarisse said. “Okay, everybody?” She walked Rachel over to her friends. “This is Silena, another Olympus high survivor. This is Chris, and Lee, and Pollux. And you remember my cousin, Beckendorf?” 

“Sure, sure!” Silena said, taking a few steps forward to Beckendorf with her hand extended. Before she could get to close to him, Beckendorf’s umbrella opened up in between them. Silena let out a startled yelp as Beckendorf tried to get him umbrella under control. 

Silena took a seat on the couch in between Lee and Clarisse, not saying anything. 

“So, you wanna tell us now, or are we waiting for four wet bridesmaids?” Clarisse asked. 

Silena took a deep breath. “Oh god, well, it all started about a half hour before the wedding. I was standing in the room where we were keeping all the presents, and I was looking at this gravy boat. I mean, this really gorgeous crystal gravy boat. And then, suddenly I realize that I was more turned on by this gravy boat that I was by Luke. And then I got really freaks out. And then it hit me! How much Luke looks like John Kennedy. I mean ... I always knew he looked familiar but ... anyway, I just had to get out of there. And I started asking myself, ‘why am I doing this?’ And ‘Who am I doing this for?’ So anyway, I just didn’t know where to go. And I know you and I have kind of drifted apart, but you were the only person I knew who lived here in the city.” Silena finished, looking at Clarisse. 

“Who wasn’t invited to the wedding.” Clarisse added. 

Silena scrunched up her face. “I was kind of hoping that wouldn’t be an issue.” 

[mollymauk-teafleak]

Decaf Coffee

Something very self indulgent I wrote basically for myself and @spiky-lesbian

Part of my modern AU Percildan series, Black Coffee

Warning: discussions of trans male pregnancy

-----------

It started as a series of small realisations. Alone, they were just moments passing by, it was only when Vax thought about them all at once that things made sense.

It was the way Percy would only cry over a film if it included a family, particularly if there was an emotional reunion at the end. It was how he’d linger in the clothes sections of stores, finding an excuse to hang back amongst the children’s clothes, smiling at racks of mini dungarees and shoes that looked impossibly tiny for any feet. It was how he’d eagerly make plans with Molly and Caleb, only to spend the whole time hunkered down on the floor with their son and daughter, happily playing any role they gave him in their imaginary games.

And it dawned on Vax at the most random time, when he was stood in the doorway that lead to the en suite, watching as Percy stretched out across the bed. He just looked so peaceful in that moment, lying on his stomach, hair sticking up from the shower.

Vax just stood there and let it sink in that he had his whole life ahead of him with this man. He’d signed for him and everything; he had the ring to prove it.

And maybe it was that thought, that idea of the future they had together, that knitted those dispirate moments together in a way that made sense.

Still tasting peppermint toothpaste on his tongue, Vax padded over and curled up next to Percy, wrapping his arms around him.

Percy laughed softly as he turned to embrace him, hand slipping down and resting lightly where his oversize college rugby jersey ended and Vax’s thigh began, “Finally come to join me, darling?”

Vax nodded, “I was just thinking.”

“Oh?” Percy’s lips softly met the crown of his head. Vax was notoriously clingy, the way he immediately anchored onto him like a drowning swimmer to a life preserver wasn’t worrying but there was something in his voice, “Would you like to share what you were thinking about?”

His husband seemed to pause, exhaling softly before he murmured, “You want a kid, don’t you, Freddy?”

Percy stopped, his mind running through the long list of things he’d been expecting before that question. And it wasn’t even a question really, it was a statement, a question mark only put at the end for grammatical correctness.  

He opened his mouth to say that he’d never thought about having children before, that it wasn’t something that had entered his mind. An oversight, maybe, given that they were approaching their first anniversary but not something that he’d considered.

But the words wouldn’t come. Because it was in that moment that he realised they weren’t true.

“I...I suppose I do,” Percy murmured, after he realised he hadn’t said anything for a very long time, “Though I haven’t given it a lot of thought. Does it... bother you? You seem bothered?”

“I’m not bothered,” Vax didn’t pull away from him, staying tucked up against him like he was a little embarrassed, “I mean, I’m confused. But more about how I feel about it, not about you wanting it.”

Percy’s fingers worked through his hair, enjoying its smoothness after just being brushed, “It’s okay to feel confused. I mean, I didn’t even know I wanted to be a father until now.”

“Really?” Vax looked up then, eyes wide and dark like some nocturnal animal, “I realised before you did?”

“Have you tried to be in my mind, Vax? It’s all blueprints and circuit diagrams up here, I don’t understand emotions,” he rather hoped the joke would undercut the realisation that they were talking about quite serious adult stuff now.

Vax did manage a smile and kissed Percy’s bare shoulder, “I just...I know you and me had shaky relationships with the whole idea of family…”

“Something of an understatement,” Percy said quietly, feeling a very familiar unpleasantness open up in his stomach, the one that followed having emotionally distant parents and difficult siblings for the biggest part of your childhood, only to have them violently ripped away from you and having preserving their legacy be the only thing able to keep you going through your grief. And once that was done, being unsure why you even did it.

Vax had his own trauma. He’d talked about it in the same fits and starts, punctuated by nightmares and sobbing fits, that Percy used talked about his own. Their common language.

He knew he and his twin sister had been taken away from their mother to live with their emotionally abusive father, only to then lose their only source of parental love when their mother passed away. Such a simple way to talk about an event that had shaken Vax so totally, left him unsure of himself, terrified to love anyone for fear they’d be taken away.

Of course the idea of being a father would terrify Vax. As it should terrify Percy.

But it didn’t.

Percy stroked his hand down Vax’s nack, fingers making soothing circles in the tighter curls there, “I know we’ve had some… less than ideal role models. But I think that just makes me want to do it more? I think I want the chance to make some things right. Like it might be a way to heal.”

Vax was quiet for a moment, absorbing that, before he murmured, “I think I want that. Or I want to want that. But I don’t know how to be that brave, I mean I have no idea how to even be a good dad. All I know is… mine. And I couldn’t bear to make someone else go through that?”

Percy shifted down so he and Vax were eye to eye. So close that Vax could see the little indents on his nose where his glasses sat.

“Vax’ildan,” he murmured softly, “You are not your father. You’d never act the way he did because you’re a genuinely good person and you’re kind and brave and brilliant. You’re so good to those around you and you’ve already proven that the things he did haven’t got to you. Part of the reason I’m so sure I want to have a family with you is because I know they’d be getting you for a parent.”

“Oh,” Vax seemed unable to say anything else, doing what he always did when he was confronted with emotions, particularly positive ones about himself, and hiding against Percy.

Percy had to giggle fondly, his own throat a little thick. He rocked his husband gently, waiting until he was ready to unfurl himself and keep talking. Getting through to him when he was curled up so tight like a woodlouse would be impossible.

Eventually he felt him relax a little and Percy immediately took the opportunity to kiss both his cheeks, his nose, his eyelids as delicate as a feather. Soon Vax was grinning in spite of the large red spots of blush on his cheeks.

“Now,” Percy rested his forehead against his husband’s, “I know my words won’t fix everything. And, I do mean this honestly, we absolutely do not have to have a family if you aren’t ready for it. I love what we have right now and if this is what the rest of my life looks like, I’m already the luckiest guy in the world.”

Vax looked tempted to dive again but he managed to just smile thinly and stroke his hand up under Percy’s pyjama shirt, “I… I kind of guess it’s been in the back of my mind when I’ve been watching you brood so much you can see it from space-”

“Kind of an exaggeration…”

“And I guess it’s been...um...what’s that word for the thing coffee does when you leave it a long time?”

“Percolating?”

“Yeah, that’s it. It’s been doing that. And I think I’ve realised I would like to have a kid, even if I’m kind of terrified of the idea. Does that make sense?”  he looked at Percy nervously, like he’d just confessed to something horrible.

Percy smiled tenderly, feeling like he really was going to cry before they reached the end of this conversation, “I think that’s exactly how parenthood is supposed to go, actually.”

That seemed to cheer Vax up, he leaned in and kissed Percy happily, a kiss that had a promise held within it.

“And I mean,” Percy hummed, holding Vax close, unwilling to have those lips too far away from his own, “The adoption process can take a really long time. Plenty of time to feel more comfortable with it.”

Vax blinked, “I mean, yeah, that would be nice, I like the idea of giving a kid a home. But… I have all the kit inside me right? I assumed when you were thinking about it you meant… you know, home grown?”

Percy’s eyebrows shot up, “Oh, really? I didn’t know if that was an avenue you’d want to go down?”

Vax shifted, biting his lip, “I don’t know, it’s just… it’s the first thing I pictured? It would be a pretty big change though…”

Percy nodded slowly, getting the sense that this was a time to stay quiet and listen. He was getting better at spotting those rather than jumping in with a million solutions, desperate to help rather than just sharing the weight of problems. Kiki had pointed that out to him.

“I… I want to think I can do it,” Vax’s fingers traced anxious patterns up and down his husband’s spine, “But there’s so many voices in my head saying different things about it and I don’t know how to sort them out.”

“Well…” Percy brightened, realising he could say something useful now, “We could make a list?”

Vax looked at him steadily for a moment before bursting into helpless laughter, “Of course. Of course that’s your answer…”

“Hey!” Percy grinned, cheeks darkening a little but delighted to see his husband laughing, “Don’t knock it until we’ve tried it!”

“Fine, you adorable nerd…”

Five minutes later and Vax was curled up in his duvet on the overstuffed, cracked leather sofa Percy kept in his workshop for those nights before he met Vax when he’d just give into exhaustion and collapse there, ready to rise like a zombie and keep working the next day.

Percy brought his chair over, glasses perched at the end of his prominent nose. He put his legs up beside Vax, resting a pad of paper on his knees. It was meant for sketching design ideas but it would do.

“Okay, so we’ll start with the cons,” Percy drew a line down the middle of the page, “What would be bad about carrying this baby? No wrong answers, just say what’s on your mind.”

Vax sighed and pulled a face, “The dysphoria is the main thing. I’d pretty much be at the mercy of it for nine whole months.”

Percy nodded, adding it to the list.

Once he’d gotten the first one out and realised the sky hadn’t fallen in on him, Vax picked up speed, “I’d be passing on my dad’s genes which is just ugh…childbirth doesn’t look like a whole lot of fun… it would affect my career, I wouldn’t be able to dance for a while and then I’d have to work really hard to get my fitness levels back up… I’d have to come off T for a while, right?”

Percy nodded, tongue poking out a little as he concentrated, pencil flying across the paper, “Anything else?”

Vax looked like he was trying to get more words out but they were fighting him, “I mean...would it, um...gods, this sounds stupid but would it affect how attractive you found me?”

“Oh Vax…” Percy’s eyes softened.

“I know, I know,” the half elf hunched further into his mass of blanket, “I just need to hear it?”

Percy nudged Vax gently with one foot, “Vax’ildan, you are the most gorgeous person I know, you’re beautiful inside and out. Nothing will ever change that.”

The tips of those slightly curved ears went cherry red, “Thanks, babe.”

“Is that all of the cons?” Percy smiles, thinking how badly he wanted to kiss those ears and see if they were as hot to the touch as they looked.

“Yeah,” Vax nodded, “That’s all the ones I could think of.”

“Righty ho,” Percy turned back to the paper, getting very into this now, “Pros. What would be good?”

Vax seemed to relax, eyes drifting far away, “It would be faster than adopting...and adopting would still be a good option in the future. I haven’t had a real bad period of dysphoria in ages and… well, even if I did, you’d be there to help, right?”

Percy smiled gently, “Every step of the way.”

“And that’s another thing, I really like the idea of doing this with you, making a baby with you...oh, the sex! We’d be obligated to have sex every day, that would be cool.”

“We have sex pretty much every day anyway,” Percy grins but he didn’t disagree.

Vax softened, “I’d be holding onto a piece of my mama. That would be special. And…the amount she loved me and Vex’ahlia, feeling a love like that would be incredible...and Vex, of course, she’d love to be an auntie and she’d be an amazing one.”

Percy nodded slowly, thinking the same of Keyleth, who was his sister in all but blood, and Cassandra, how this would bring some light into her life and maybe make the city their family died in less of a nightmare for her.

“And...well…” Vax bit his lip, looking suddenly uncomfortable, “I’m...I’m going to live a lot longer than you, Freddy. If I had a child, they’d...they’d still be with me even after…”

The pencil suddenly slipped on the paper, leaving a streak of grey across the divide between their columns. Percy felt a hollow open up inside him. It was true, as a half elf, Vax’s lifespan far outstripped his but they both hated being reminded of that. It was a darkness that lurked in the back of their minds, able to be beaten back on a daily basis, but every so often it would lurch to the forefront just to remind them it was, and always would be there.

He managed a brave smile, looking up at Vax, “That’s a really good point, darling.”

Vax nodded, sighing softly, “And I mean...we’d have a baby. A beautiful little baby who looked a little like me and a little like you and entirely themselves. And every time I looked at them, I’d know… I’d know I could do anything. I could make something as amazing as that.”

The tears were falling down his face before Percy really realised it, landing on the page and blurring the words a little.

“Don’t cry on our list,” Vax laughed, teary eyed himself, “We worked hard on that!”

Percy gave a damp laugh, wiping under his glasses, “Sorry...is that everything you want to put on the list?”

Vax thought, fingers twisting gently in his hair, “Well...Caduceus makes a really nice decaf coffee.”

Percy’s face split into a wide smile, “That he does.” On the list it went.

“So…” Vax smiled shyly, “I think that means we’re doing this? We’re going to have a baby?”

“Looks that way,” Percy murmured, emotion welling up in his chest. He had the sense that it was going to be a teary year ahead of them.

The list was left on the floor as Vax opened his arms for Percy to move into, crashing together into tear-stained kisses. But it would be picked up later, carefully folded and kept in the drawer by their bed. It would be taken out and reread many times over the next year, mostly the pros column, even added to a few times until it far outweighed the cons. It was badly needed a few times, a lifeline when Vax stopped his hormones, when they struggled to conceive for the first few months, the hectic day when they went to the first scan and realised it was twins, the two of them having forgotten somewhere along the way that this particular genetic quirk ran in both of their families.

And the day Elaina and Johanna de Rolo finally entered their lives.

[losersweregoingclownhunting]

The One Where The Losers are F·R·I·E·N·D·S

Or The One Where Ben Gets a Roommate 

So I rewrote the first Friends episode, but with the Losers as a stress relief? It’s probably really bad, but I figured I post it somewhere. Sorry if it’s full of errors and mostly dialogue or if it’s been done before.  

Beverly, Richie, Eddie, Mike, and Ben were in sitting in the coffee shop near their apartments. It was a normal day for the Losers. They spent most of their time together, telling stories and giving each other updates. Nothing out of the ordinary ever happened. Bev had just finished telling the Losers about her almost-maybe boyfriend.

“Seriously? Bev, you know I love you, but if you’re dating this guy, something has to be wrong with him!” Richie laughed, leaning towards Bev. “Is it a hump? A Hairpiece? A chalk eater?”

The others laughed as Bev shoved Richie. “Everyone can calm down. We’re not dating. We went to dinner a couple times and didn’t even have sex.”

“That sounds nice Bev,” Eddie said.

“Nice? Even your mom and I have more exciting dates than that,” Richie said.

Eventually they stopped talking about Bev’s dates. Richie was telling everyone about one of his stranger dreams when Bill walked in. His shirt and hair were wet, despite the umbrella in his hand. He looked around; eyes glazed over. He sat down on the couch between Eddie and Bev.

“Greta m-m-moved her s-s-stuff out t-today. B-but I want her to b-be happy.” Despite the stutter, Bill sounded really calm. The others didn’t say anything, just stared at him. He started speaking again, this time with more anger. “Okay fine, I hope she goes to hell. S-she left me and all anyone can t-talk about is that she’s a lesbian. Like, how was I supposed to know that when even she didn’t!”

“Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian.” Ben didn’t look up from his newspaper. He continued to read for a moment until he realized nobody was speaking. He looked up, panic in his eyes. “I said that out loud didn’t I?”

Mike handed Bill a cup of coffee before sitting on the couch across from everyone. “Bill, I know this is probably painful and you’ll want a quick fix-”

“Good thing there is one, the strip club!” Richie interrupted, lifting his hand for Eddie to high five. Eddie rolled his eyes, breathing out a sharp breath.

“I was going to say there is no quick fix. But, hey there’s a lot of good things about being single.”

“B-b-being single is the worse. I’m m-meant to be married. I want that life, to be married again.”

The bell above the door rang. The Losers turned without thinking. Someone walked in wearing a suit that still had the boutonniere pinned to the jacket. He looked frantic, as if looking for someone. Like Bill, the rain had soaked his clothes and hair. The guy ran to the checkout muttering something to the waitress.

Bev stood up, recognizing him from when she was younger. She tapped him on the shoulder, wondering how much stranger the day could get. “Stanley?”

Relief washed over his face. “Beverly, I’m so glad you’re here. I feel like I’ve been running all over the city looking for you. Someone at your apartment told me that you come here often.”

Bev walked Stan towards the group. He was shaking from rain. “Let me introduce you to everyone. Everyone this is Stan. We went to Derry High together. This is Eddie, Richie, Mike, and Ben. Of course, you remember Bill from when I lived with his family?” Stan smiled and said hi as Bev said everyone’s names. Bill jumped to his feet to shake Stan’s hand, but the umbrella opened, hitting them both. He heaved a sigh, dropping back down onto the couch.

Stan laughed softly, awkwardly walking to sit next to Mike. Bev took her spot next to Bill again. Nobody spoke, just stared at Stan. “Oh, you’re probably waiting for me to tell you why I am came looking for Bev.”

“I was wondering where you got suit, it’s wonderful,” Richie shrugged. He went to the counter and ordered a decaf coffee for Stan.

Stan nodded trying to figure out the best place to start. “So, you see, today was my wedding day. Everyone is waiting for the wedding to start and I’m just standing in this room with all the presents, you know? And there’s this gravy boat. I never really got why you would need a gravy boat, but it looked nice. Then suddenly,” Stan paused to grab the coffee from Richie, “I realized I don’t like the girl I was supposed to marry. I was so freaked out thinking about spending my life with Patty and I decided I had to get out of there.” Stan looked kindly at Bev. “I don’t know anyone in the city except for Bev. I know we aren’t as close, but I just didn’t know where to go. Sorry I didn’t invite you to the wedding.”

Nobody moved. Bev didn’t care about not being invited to the wedding, but she didn’t know how to help. She hadn’t talked to Stanley in years and certainly wasn’t prepared to help him after he ran away from a wedding. Stan shivered, spilling some of the coffee.

“Why don’t you finish your coffee and then you can come back to my apartment and take a shower. I’m sure one of the guys has some clothes you can borrow.”

Back at the apartment, the Losers were gathered around the TV. The only thing that was coming in in the storm was a Spanish soap opera. Richie and Bill were poorly narrating the show. Everyone was laughing at the normal dialogue they said to the dramatic acting. They continued speaking, despite Stan a few feet away on the phone.

“No, dad, I get it, but I can’t marry her… I don’t love her for one… I’m tired of people telling me who I have to be. It’s like if you’re whole life people say you’re a shoe. Well today I decided I wanted to be a purse, or a hat…No that’s a metaphor, not me asking for a hat.” Stan looked at the others, exasperated. Mike turned the TV down so everyone could listen to the conversation. “I’ll just stay with Beverly.” The others looked from Stan to Bev, who just shrugged, knowing Stan could stay at one of their apartments. “Fine, if you think you need to cut me off! Maybe you should just fire me too…Wait I said maybe!”

Stan held the phone away from his face. His dad had hung up without a goodbye. He turned to the others, but suddenly couldn’t breathe. Stan’s hands moved frantically to show he needed help. Eddie rushed to the kitchen and grabbed a paper bag.

“Just breathe. I’ve been through this a million times. Try to think of calming things.” Eddie rested his hand on Stan’s knee. Ben started singing the lyrics to a few of my favorite things. After a few lines, Stan lowered the bag. “I think he’s alright, Ben.”

“Isn’t this for the better Stan? Now you’ve got independence and can be that hat?” Richie asked from the kitchen where he and Bill were making sandwiches. He handed one to Ben as he leaned over the back of the couch. “Plus, you’ve always got me.”

“It’s his wedding day Richie, what is wrong with you?” Eddie said, slapping his hand off Stan’s shoulder.

“Hey your mom and I aren’t exclusive!”  

“BEEP BEEP RICHE,” Bill and Bev both yelled from the kitchen.  

“Just ignore him, that’s what we do,” Mike explained. The door buzzed and all of them cringed. Nobody liked the noise, especially not Mike. He pushed the intercom button. “Hello?”  

“It’s Paul!”

“Buzz him in!” Bev yelled. Bill opened his mouth, ready to make a comment about Paul. “Okay, yes, before you ask my date tonight is the wine guy. My we’re-not-dating date is with Paul the wine guy. He finally asked me out.” She looked at Stan, still in wet clothes on the couch. “I can cancel if you want me to.” Stan waved her off and then she saw Bill’s sad face. “Do you need me to stay?”

“No, go. You’ve been trying to date this wine-guy forever.”

Ben leaned over to Mike. “Does he sell wine or drink it? Or is it like whine with an h?” Mike shrugged at the same time Paul knocked on the door.

Bev crossed the room and opened the door. “Hi Paul, this is, everyone I guess.” They were standing in a line next to the door smiling. After Bev finished her sentence everyone started mock cheering Pauls’ name. “I’ll see you all later tonight.” Bev pulled Paul out of the apartment.

Stan sat down, a sad look settling on his face. For a second, he regretted telling Bev to leave. He didn’t know anyone in the apartment except Bill and Ben. He’d known Bill years ago and Ben he’d only met in passing when Bill came home from school. Bill pulled out the chair next to him.

“So, any b-b-big plans for tonight?” Bill asked, failing to be casual.

“I was going to be flying to Aruba for my honeymoon, but I’m not going to be doing that now.”

“Oh Aruba would be great…I-I mean, gross Aruba. This time of year, there’s…b-b-big…lizards?” Bill waved his hand. “If you don’t feel like being alone tonight, the guys are coming over to help me put together my new furniture.” Richie and Mike groaned in response. “They’re super excited.”

“That’s really nice, but it’s been a long day. I’d rather just get some dry clothes and be alone. Do any of you have clothes I can borrow?”

“You know what? You can come to my apartment,” Ben announced. He was the only one with an empty room. Richie had just moved in with Bev, Eddie and Mike lived across town, and Bill was moving into a one-bedroom apartment. “I have a spare room after Eddie moved out.” Stan followed Ben across the hall to the other apartment.

Eddie was sitting on the counter ledge at Bill’s apartment watching the others put together furniture. There was paper laying everywhere. Random screws were scattered on the counters and Bill looked ready to pull his hair out. He was reading the instructions of the bookshelf, but nothing he said made sense.

Richie stepped back from the bookshelf he’d just built with Mike. Mike clapped softly. Richie’s foot bumped a piece of the bookshelf that hadn’t been used. The two of them looked at it before Mike shook his head. Richie glanced at Bill then tossed it in the plant next to him.

Bill picked up a can of beer sitting next to Eddie. He looked at the label before sniffling. “Greta used to drink this. It was her favorite.” Eddie nodded like that meant something to him.

“Bill, I’ve got a question. What did you get in this divorce?” Ben asked.

“You guys?” The others groaned, looking around the room for something else to build. “Yeah, you’re right, I got s-screwed. I’m d-divorced at 26, how pathetic is that!”

Riche rolled his eyes, tossing a hammer onto the table Bill had been building. One side of the table snapped and the hammer clattered to the ground. “Bill you got to love someone for four years. Have any of us been in a relation that last even close to that? No. But you, you got four years and you got your heart ripped out at the end and honestly, it’s not worth it. Wait, no, that wasn’t my point.”

“You want to know the worst part? What if that’s it for me? What if everyone has one true love and Greta was mine and her one true love was this other girl-”

“One woman,” Ben scoffed. “Next you’re going to say there’s only one kind of ice cream. I can guarantee there is a lot of ice cream flavors. There’s Rocky Road, and strawberry, and you can get those with nuts and whipped cream. This is awesome! Look at all the ice cream you get to try.”

“Ben, are you talking about ice cream or people right now?” Bill asked.

“What does it matter! Grab a spoon, get ready to taste!”

“Grab a spoon?” Bill demanded. Ben, Richie, and Mike sat down on the floor, knowing Bill was about to spiral again. “Do you know how long I was d-dating Greta? I haven’t grabbed a spoon in years!” He dropped onto the stool. “Even if I could figure it out, ask someone out. Who would I ask?”

Silence filled the room. There wasn’t anything they could say to make Bill feel better. At least with Stan, none of them know him. They weren’t friends, they didn’t owe him anything. But Bill, Bill they wanted to help. Bill stared out the window, watching the rain hit the pavement, not realizing Stan was at Ben’s apartment doing the same.

The next morning Stan was making coffee. He pulled a coffee filter out, wondering when it would be too soon to reorganize Ben’s cupboards. How long would he let him stay? They hadn’t talked about it. He’d come back after helping Bill and Stan was already asleep. Stan poured a cup of coffee and was about to sit when he heard a knock.

Stan set his cup down and walked to the door. Richie and Bev were on the other side. They greeted Stan before going to sit at the table. Richie swung his feet onto the table, picking up Stan’s cup. He had a feeling that was just who Richie was.

“Just for my own edification, are you always at each other’s apartments?”

“Oh yeah. Bev and I can’t cook to save our lives,” Richie explained.

“Why don’t one of you live here if Ben has an open room?”

“Ah, well Eddie used to live here, but then he moved to be closer to work.”

“Plus, I hate moving,” Bev said, sitting next to Richie.

Ben walked out of his room, rubbing his eyes. He walked to the coffee pot, without looking at the people in the apartment. Judging by how unaffected he was seeing them, Richie was right. Stan hadn’t been that close with anyone since he and Bev were in high school. It was nice.

“I really wish you all would get real jobs. It is so annoying having you here in the morning.” Despite the words there was no harshness.

“I do have to get going,” Bev said looking at her watch. “I just wanted to wish you a good morning before I left Ben.” She winked at Ben and left without seeing the way his face flushed red.

“So, where do you all work?” Stan asked not wanting to ask about that dynamic.

“I’m an actor,” Richie said.

“Really? Have I seen you in anything?”

“Have you seen the reruns’ production of Pinocchio at the park theatre?” Ben snorted.

“Never in my life,” Richie pretended to be offended. He stood up walking toward the door. “You’re lucky your cute Hanscom.” He left without another word.

Stan looked at Ben. For some reason he trusted him. Stan could tell why Bev and he were friends. Ben exuded a warm and caring energy. Stan hoped that Ben would let him continue to live here, at the very least let him live there until he found a job and a new place to stay.

“Any big plans?” Ben asked. “Are you going to talk to Patty?”

“I was actually going to look for a job. My dad seemed pretty set on letting me go.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Ben looked at the clock before jumping up. “I’m so sorry! I’ve got to get going or I’m going to be late to work. If you need anything, all our numbers are on that paper I hung on the fridge. Richie will probably be at his apartment all day, Bev works at the coffee shop downstairs, and Eddie has an unorthodox schedule so he might be around too. I’ll see you tonight okay?”

Once again, Stan was sitting in the apartment alone.

Bev burst out of the back room of the coffee shop, going up to the couch where the Losers sat. Frannie had taken one look at her and known she’d slept with Paul. Not only that, she’d found out that Paul’s line that he hadn’t slept with anyone since his wife was a lie. She was irate and blurted it out once she saw Richie.

Richie looked at her from the arm of the couch where he was sitting before laughing. “How did you not know that was a line! Bev I love you, but you’re smarter than that.”

Bev shoved him off the edge before she started pacing behind the couch, trying to figure out how someone could do that to someone. She was muttering the different wh-questions. Bill stuck his arm out, stopping her. “W-w-why? You probably won’t l-like it, but it was to get into b-bed with you.”

Stan walked into the coffee shop running up to the others. “Guess what? I got hired at an accounting firm today. Then I found a sale to buy new work clothes.”

“How did you buy them?”

“My credit card?” Stan answered Bev as if her question was idiotic. Then it dawned on him. He dropped to the couch. “Which my father pays for. Shit.”

“Hand them over,” Bev said, holding out her hand. “You can’t live off your parents if you don’t have the cards.”

Stan sighed, pulling out his wallet. He handed the cards to Bev. She pulled scissors out of her apron and started cutting them in half. He sighed leaning back into the couch. This definitely was an adjustment that would take some time getting used to.

“You should give him a break,” Eddie said. “When I first came to the city, I was fourteen. My mom had just killed herself and I didn’t know anybody. I ended up living with this guy who cleaned windshields outside port authority. Then he killed himself and let me tell you, it felt like I was cursed for a bit. But believe me, I know how you feel Stan.”

Nobody spoke for a minute. Bill looked at Stan and laughed. “The word y-your s-searching for is anyways…“ The others laughed and fell into easy conversation.

Bill, Ben, and Stan were sitting on the couch in Ben’s apartment. Bev was curled up in the chair. The TV was on, but none of them were really watching it. Ben stood up stretching before shutting the TV off. He said good night and walked to his room.

Bev stood up too. “Are you crashing on the couch at my place tonight Bill?”

“No, I have to face the m-music and g-go home.” Bev gave him a worried look. “Don’t worry, I p-promise I’ll be fine.” Bev smiled before giving patting his shoulder and going to her apartment.

Bill grabbed the last cookie off the plate and broke it in half. He handed it to Stan, trying to decide how to phrase his question. “You probably don’t know this, but when we were in high school, I had a huge crush on you.” Stan smiled softly, looking embarrassed. “I knew and if we’re being fully honest, I thought you were Beverly’s geeky brother.”

Bill inhaled, trying not to feel embarrassed. “Can I ask you a question?” Stan nodded. “Try not to let my current situation factor into your answer, but do you think it’d be okay if I maybe asked you out sometime?”

Stan’s smile grew. “Yeah, maybe…” He waited, wondering if Bill would ask then. He didn’t say anything, so Stan made his way to his room. “Goodnight.”

“Looks like I just grabbed a spoon.” Bill walked towards the door, thinking everything was going to be okay.

The Losers were all sitting at their favorite spot in the coffee shop. Bev sat on the arm of the chair next to Richie, holding a half full coffee shop. She had just topped off everyone’s cups and was waiting to hear about Richie’s new dream.

“So, I’m in Derry, Maine.”

“Miss?” a customer interrupted. He was sitting at the table behind the sofa. “Could I get a refill?” Bev rolled her eyes before she handed the coffee pot to Mike. Mike held the pot up for the customer to take. Bev gestured for him to pour before turning back to Richie.

“I’m in Derry, Maine. I’m a clown-”

Obviously these characters are Stephen King’s and the story + some of the quotes are not mine, but property of Warner Brothers. 

[sundiefundie]

After hearing about the Plath family, and seeing as Hulu is recommending it on my screen I've decided to give it a go. Lucky you get to come along on this ride with me.

Episode One- Meet the Plaths

The house looks less Duggar-ish on the outside than I expected.

Soooo many blondes!!

PANTS on FEMALES!!

No technology. I get it. Kids don't need it every moment of the day. However it is essential for future employment.

No shoes?????

Tom Brady is eh anyways.

Kids don't know who Justin Beiber is but mom does???

They must not attend a Baptist church because the kids would be drowning coke and sweet tea.

Dog is named Dolly....Dolly Parton perhaps? Nah, I didn't think so either

Lydia is Jana Duggar the Georgia edition

What do you like to do for fun? She isn't sure???

Moriah is her own self and obviously the family doesnt like it. But to not be able to think of positive thing right away about your child?

Moriah is "wired differently" ??? She is your flesh and blood. You are responsible for that wiring. Take credit.

Hosanna is the perfect child.

She needs college to GET A JOB WITH BENEFITS AND TO CLIMB THE ECONMIC LADDER. College lets her find herself.

Ethan got married at his childhood home as a way to say goodbye? Did Olivia have input? A church? A park? Court house?

This chick better not make me dislike her because Olivia is what I am naming my first daughter.

Guys at work cuss and you want your mommy? Get. Off. The. Tit.

This is why you can't shelter your children so much! You are NOT preparing them fie the real world. Your bubble isn't the real world.

Olivia took his virginity in all areas of life. Like he is from a 3rd world country.

Ethan likes Friends. Wow.

Olivia likes to drink. Go Olivia.

Plath's have an issue with Ethan trying Coca Cola and ice cream???? I don't like these people.

Barry just poured himself coffee. Coffee has caffeine and you can't tell me it is decaf!

I get wanting simplicity for your children. I want simplicity but you can't hide from the world.

I was homeschooled. I enjoyed it because of the issues I faced in my specific public school. However it was a choice I got to make. My parents gave that option to me in 6th grade.

I now teach in a public Montessori school. I love the mixed age groups and learning levels in one area. I get that part of why Kim wants to homeschool.

They haven't had any major issues yet they cut to Moriah...hmmm...

Nice to see the girls dress how they want. Shorts, tank tops, sleeveless dresses.

Lydia is sweet.

Poker wine. Port wine.

For Ethan and Olivia to have alcohol that is a sad bottle opener.

He didn't have an Over Hang after those 12 drinks.

I like Olivia

Isaac built a cabin! Impressive!

Barry is hands on with his children and I love that! You rarely see that anymore.

Ethan couldn't stay in the rain a few seconds more to open the car door for his wife? Chivalry is offically dead in Fundie land.

I'm getting gay vibes with Ethan. Either he is and doesn't realize it (although you can tell he adores Olivia) or he was just so sheltered and brain washed I to a Keep Sweet mentality that all he knows is to smile 24/7 and speak in that tone and mannerism.

Moriah looks cute in the "60's" dress!!

Oh. My. Word. Ethan found "delicate stuff"

"I didn't know they had any sticky ones!" I can't!! I want to go shopping with Ethan!

Kim wears the pants in the house, not Barry (sorry, Barry!).

How was this family found and chosen for a show in the first place?

Kim may have had an alcoholic mom but that doesn't mean you shun it. That makes them want it all the more and there is where an issue could arise. Educate them. Moderation.

Kim is living her perfect childhood through her children. No different than a pageant mom who never won a trophy.

Olivia is saving Moriah and I love this.

Will she do the same for Lydia? Would Lydia even accept her help?

I'm nervous for Moriah. However the girl had a camera crew with her, how can Kim say no on camera?

San Francisco. Home of the Gays. As a lesbian, I guarantee that she won't catch it. It's not contagious.

She is worried about alcoholism. Georgia is one of the lands of moonshine isn't it?

Education is important. 1 point and only 1 point for Kim. But still, let her go to California.

This has turned into a family meeting.

San Francisco is 1996. On the fringe? Hmmm

Hom...less issues. He freaking paused.

Now the ball is in Moriah's court. I like that. She has to prove herself responsible. Better than the Duggars who would have said no right off and send the kid off to a "camp".

I hate to say this, but now I need to watch episode 2.