#I barely talk on the discord with my FRIENDS THO

[nick-close]

I wanna make like a small fun discord server for dndads muts and cool folks but I’m actually very antisocial and don’t like talking for more than 5 minutes at a time so idk how that’d work out

[noxtivagus]

i will be productive now (real)

[mxbo]

Me yapping about something that happened on TF2 today

I was playing casual TF2 with a friend now that there aren't as many bots (I SUCK like REAL BAD, so no way we're going to community servers, I would get OBLITERATED the second I stepped on one, also a lot of players on community servers dislike F2Ps for existing) and found a player who shares names with my light and it was really awesome

[ID: Meme recreating the interaction. There's me, my bestie, the random player we encountered and batman in the background because he was also there. My bestie says: “OMG! *redacted name*” and I reply: “Voice communication is not available for this account”]

(BTW, me and my bestie are not drawn with specific cosmetics, it's just our OC's/sonas dressed as the classes we were playing lol. Yes, he was pocketing me because I'm just THAT bad)

(BTWBTW, we didn't actually talk with them, just mentioned it in our private call because like it would be super weird to go “hey, you have my love's name”. Super creepy HASHSj. Worst case scenario, they wouldn't believe I actually have a partner and think I'm hitting on them or something. And women and people who pass as feminine because of username/voice already suffer enough on FPS games with people either insulting them or simping for them and not seeing them actual players but objects. Like I'm not risking (potentially) making their day worse ykwim)

Anyway, they had pink cosmetics and I think I shot a rocket at them at some point because I thought they were RED AHSA *insert video about the problem with team recognition*.

[ID: Screenshot of the random player with their name obviously censored not because of them, but because it would reveal my love's name and, like, I haven't consulted if I can just say it in a random Tumblr post AJSAHJ]

There was also a Soldier who had all the batman cosmetics and dominated me because of course JHS (they were super good at rocket jumping). I sadly didn't take a screenshot (THEY WERE SO FAST AND KILLED ME, I COULDN'T TAKE A SCREENSHOT) </3

Also, yeah, I'm a F2P until MY BESTIE DECIDES TO PAY FOR MY FRICKING PREMIUM UEYDEUEHR (hopefully this or next week).

Hate that I'm mute for the time being, tho. Because Valve thought not letting F2P accounts speak would solve the bot crisis for some reason some years ago. SPOILER: It didn't work, it just made the bots more difficult to identify and ruined the experience of a bunch of players (kids, people who can't pay for TF2 like me, and people who just play for fun and don't want to throw money at a corporation, which is completely valid). Thanks, Valve.

But also love the fact I own the title of worst TF2 F2P, like, that way nobody expects anything from me.

My steam profile backs this up btw

[ID: My user says “world's worst tf2 player” and my description “I suck at tf2 it's not even funny”. Also, my pfp is the spongebob crying meme edited to have my OC's hair and Soldier's helmet and says “I PROMISE I'LL DO BETTER” in the funny impact font]

I'm genuinely bad (reason why I play Soldier) BUT I HAVE SO MUCH FUN PLAYING TF2, I LOVE THIS GAME EVEN IF I GET KILLED EVERY X SECONDS (x being equal to the time I take to respawn).

I want to meet more noobs like me and play with them while on a Discord call and learn together (would also help me with my English, probably, if they're not hispanophone).

Or maybe even players who know what they're doing and teach me (but they need to have patience with me because I'm a SLOW learner and barely know how to WASD lmao, my spacial awareness in videogames is just like in real life: 0).

Someone interested? 🤨

No, Rom, nobody's interested, nobody cares LMAO, just go back to making userboxes and stamps and drawings and stuff

[starz4valen]

queers im fucking lost come save me

ok but in all seriousness,

despite labeling myself as aroace for a hot minute and finding comfort in that label and the community for a time—shit doesnt feel quite right anymore.

i have had ONE EX. one.

i genuinely think i was in love with him. i only felt what i felt with him,,,WITH HIM. nobody else. I felt the butterflies/giddiness, i loved his laugh, his smile, hearing him, his jokes, all the names he would call me, how much he said he loved me, our late night discord calls, having him around, just. him. when he rarely spoke abt shit that was bothering him it hurt me so bad, like i would hurt with him. and the mere THOUGHT of ME hurting him made me wanna sob.

as you can probably guess by the fact we’re exes, we’re not together anymore. it hurts. hell, my stomach tangled a bit as i typed that out. (could be cause recently someone who used to be a friend went and dated him and then got upset at me for getting upset at them but this ain't abt them.)

we broke up in like june last year, and i felt so fucking horrible about it bc it basically ended w him yelling at me over text at how horrible i am at listening and how i treated him more like a therapist—which i will admit i did. i sucked for that. it makes sense why tho, i was working through a lot of shit at the time, doesn’t justify it at all though. i should’ve treated him better. im desperately trying to fix it in my current relationships so that never happens again.

then again, he also treated me badly. he said things that really fucked with my sense of trust in people and just made me scared to get close with anyone like that ever again, or in general bc i was convinced everyone had some ulterior motive w me or secretly didnt give a shit abt me—but also i felt *I* was the problem. like every relationship im in is gonna end horribly bc im just that bad. its taken a lot to say that i feel loved by and trust my current friends, as well as trying to recognize that I deserve love, and im glad i can say that im getting better ^^

but,,,idk anymore

i concluded i was aroace almost a year after we broke up. there were a couple reasons. for one, i only really got that close w him. i dont really know if ive had a crush or what that feels like—in fact i think i faked one in elementary, the whole reason i got w my ex was bc he was flirting w me and it made me feel nice. (also bc i was worried he would be my only shot at love but i digress) i feel off when people talk about heading to poundtown or anything like that, the same with crushes—just crushes tho relationships i totally get—and i still struggle to wrap my head around attraction and how people just can look at someone without even knowing them at ALL and go “you. i want you.”

i wrote off how i felt when i was with him as simply some non-romantic form of attraction and called it a day.

but recently ive been reflecting on that, and i think i was wrong. the way that even now i get all these emotions by merely talking abt my ex says something. how upset seeing that "friend" going ahead and dating him after barely knowing him and just how angry i was says something. the way i cried seeing my best friend get a whole small crate of presents from their partner for their bday bc i was THAT JEALOUS says something. the way i yearn for affection and to be loved again says something. the way im starting to miss being in love again says something. the way i would always want some sort of relationship—even when i identified as aroace—but just never thought it would happen bc i didn't feel pretty enough, or mentally well enough, deserving of one, or like id ever be lucky enough to find someone who makes me feel that way again and how scared and sad that makes me,,,says something.

now in terms of poundtown—legit dunno. closest to that I've done w anyone was neck kisses from my ex, which i did really enjoy—but also i legit identified as ace like the whole time we were together and the few times he made jokes like that i felt uncomfy. plus the only way i feel i could be ok w going further w something like that is if its either excessively gentle or the most unserious thing ever. so tbh if i had to take a guess on how i feel abt that—not too keen on it.

I'm debating a couple labels, bi, aroace, bi and ace, demirose, and demirose and bi, but tbh i feel bi kinda fits the most? (maybe???) but also it doesn't. idk if its the fear of opening my mind to me being in a relationship despite my fear of intimacy and commitment or just that I'm aroace and this is my brain telling me to stop overthinking shit—but i know i wanna figure this shit out

if anyone has like legit any words of advice PLEASE send it my way. i will take even the tiniest crumb of guidance cause i am more lost than a child in ikea.

thanks to anyone who read all this <3

[drpeppertummy]

ok some actual tummy-oriented sunny thoughts of varying steaminess haphazardly cobbled together from discord messages (bc thats where all my thoughts get thunk)

thinkin about sunny & executive dysfunction. thinkin about sunny wanting to get up & make himself some dinner so bad but he just Cannot. i would never project onto him what are you talking about. for as much as he overeats i think sunny finds himself in that predicament often too. cant make himself get up. or sometimes he'll be in too much of a Mental State™️ to eat

his belly rumbles at the sight or mention of food unless hes like already stuffed. he is Utterly Cartoonish

if sunny falls asleep with his belly out laurie & carrie & dave are gonna try to draw on it. it doesnt work well bc hes so hairy but theyre trying. big marker. maybe some paint if they got it lyin around. maybe some stickers. its a miracle he doesnt feel it. he doesnt mind til he has to get cleaned up & then if theres paint & stickers instead of just marker its all caught in his belly hair

ive always got sunny on the tummy end but i think he gives excellent tummy rubs. surprisingly gentle & tender. any time lauries tummy hurts shes in good hands. he enjoys givin her tummy rubs as much as she enjoys receiving them bc shes all soft & warm & nice to touch. sometimes he'll start kneading like a cat & shes like❔ but thats usually when her tummys Not Upset so she doesnt mind. sometimes its kinda nice

thinking about sunny hangin out with [noise-sensitive friend]. i think if he realized his loud nasty burps were bothering them hed try to keep them quiet but hes not very good at it so he might also try to hold them in & swallow em back down. but then his bellys getting so rumbly hes makin a bunch of noise either way. i think inevitably tho its gonna become Too Much for his tummy & such a big ones gonna come out that it startles the both of em. for once in his life sunnys a little embarrassed about a burp

sunnys the type to wiggle around on purpose if he has a sloshy tummy. he amuses himself. will push his belly in & out to make it make a noise

thinking about the way his mood changes when he doesnt feel good. normally hes rowdy & loud & silly & mischievous & annoying but if his belly hurts he gets quiet & sad & he just wants 2 be held gentle & cuddled. surefire way to know if somethins up with sunny is when hes quiet. tummyache is Least Worst scenario bc then hes just all soft n cuddly until it goes away. as opposed to other situations where he might be scared or upset or moody

[tiny sunny] i think tiny sunny would be so dumb about food. hed be like "duh i can eat a grape its just a grape🙄" without considering that a grape is now the size of his entire torso & double down on it & try to keep eating until no more would fit. & he would need the Worlds Gentlest Tummy Rub but So careful bc his tummy hurts. & feels like a grape . &he will not learn from it💖 his takeaway from the experience will prob just be that someone held him gentle & rubbed his tummy for a while & therefore trying to eat an entire grape was not so bad actually

[tiny sunny] thinking.about laurie (playfully) tormenting tinysunny by putting him in various silly little jails. shed stop if he was really unhappy about it but mostly shes just Buggin Him. he cant argue bc all he does is Bug Her. hes in his little like lego enclosure yelling HEY. HEY. CAN I HAVE SOME CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! banging a paperclip against the bars loud as fuck until she gives him treats [MEAN] what if he was like soo hungrie & she put the cheece just out of reach. tryin 2 grab it. tummy growlin. gonna get himself all wedged between the bars but he doesnt care . Cheese Time🤤 tummy fulla cheese got him even more wedged in there He Doesnt Care hes just gonna fall asleep like that

[tiny sunny] i think he would let laurie cram him into barbie clothes that barely fit. certainly dont fit after dinner. hed have that velcro poppin open

[cakiette]

.. ꒰ - ‌🐶 hello worldd !! >.< ֙⋆ ་ ᳝

🎀🐾 Elle // Clover // Fawn !!

♡🍀 She/her || Fem || Minor ୧ ‧₊˚

☆ Eng only please!! (Unless its a joke talk) 🍮🫘

‧₊˚ Intro inspired by @/kogalcutie! ໒꒱

🛼 I like my notifs getting blown up so go ham!! ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶

‼️ FYI, I do block freely, so if you are just a dick, i will be tempted to block you!!

⋆˙⟡ Mostly object show stuff!! 💤🫧

🍓🍰 DNI if you think ur an asshole + problematic ( + comship proship) in general!! ⋆˙⟡♡

🥞🗯️ Don’t compare my artstyle to others and/or don’t shame the way I draw!! >_&lt;; It makes me uncomfortable. ˎˊ˗

🥝🎀 DMs are open ˎˊ˗ You can have me insert tw/cw in a post. (If ya wanna talk to me normally but im not that familiar w/ u plz do it through asks cuz priv DMs do gimme anxiety)

🩵 Discord: cakiette || yes! We can be moots! But first off please get to know me first :’3 (read below ↓↓)

꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹ ᰔ Don’t treat me like ur friend immediately, give me time to develop! I’m pretty introverted !! I’m still looking for friends, idm the age, just the personality!! 🩹💒

Socials 𖦹 ´ ᯅ ` 𖦹

🐾🫂 @/skullputer — wattpad ✩࿐࿔

@ask-steve-cobs-ii — tumblr alt (im inactive on there sorry yall) 🎡

@mepad-daily — tumblr mepad alt! Just mepad stuffs :3 im sooo normal abt him !!!!

Moots 🥞💤

@xveii — Matcha 🍵 Shes so humorously goofy /pos but so enjoyable to b around!!

@24kvealie — Vealie 🛼 I like her vibe goin on,, :33

@milkiette — Yuna!! 🎀 My /p partner ilysm

@starigen — Lav ⭐️ I love her funny lil groove sm im ur #1 stan!! Ur so pretty u dont look real,, /pos BUT U HAVE AN ACTUAL PERSONALITY AND UR SMART TOO?? IM LOWK SCARED OF TALKING TO U BUT URR AMAZINGGGG

@laveries — Freya 💌 SHES SO SWEET !!! 🥹 she even once teached me to do math cuz my math teacher b ass

@qsarahs — Sarah 🧋Just Sarah :3 with a funky y2k fashion

@admiussion — Roxxi 🩻 so freaking silly tho

@euvqji — Alice 🤍 she’s genuinely so nice but i feel scared talking 2 her cuz shes so pretty :’(

@/psychicmisfortune — Psy 🔮 we barely talk but i consider ya a moot!!

☆ btw here is my objectsona / sona !! Her name is elle and she/her. Her designnn is based of off Moppu from Sanrio (I love moppu soo)

☆☆☆

[cerealmonster15]

I’m acting on a whim and posting some unfinished(?) fanfic stuff I wrote like a year ago. Part of my many branches of caterella aus that has vague reference to one of my rsa ocs (dañarte)… but with a cater/idia main plot with jamil/azul happening in he background. My blurbs ended in a bit of a sad spot BUT it was always the intention in my mind that there would be happy resolutions 🙏 these were just little things I wrote for my friend and me bc it was an au we talked about…

Context: idia and cater are bonding, but only online over magicam, and idia is kinda catfishing cater (though not maliciously). when i was trying to name my original rsa oc (char) and looking at names, eppa was one of my initial possible choices. It was maybe my friend who had the idea initially of idia having a fake, RSA princely identity that cater gets to know over magicam?

Eventually I picked char for my actual guy, and dañarte became his cousin via me making typos and more discord sillies lol, but prince eppa became a pseudonym for idia and created another branch for the story. I’ve talked a bit about the dañarte lore and some of that comes into play here. Char I guess would too but I don’t think he got mentioned anywhere lol sorry buddy. But ya idia is pretending to be a prince at rsa named eppa who “secretly likes video games” or whatever I think lol. Idia likes his bond with cater but can’t even begin to think of how cater would react if he found out idia was lying to him.

Anyway. This is more cater/idia (and board game boys friendship) focused than anything (lots of idia pov pining lol) and idk if anyone would wanna read it but I’m putting it here to record keep anyway. No ao3 Bc It’s very unedited and unfinished and just kinda blurb writing lol

But it’s the only time if technically written for caydia. And I do like it. It’s just embarrassing bc I get embarrassed with my oc things and my love for romance drama but i guess I’ve been exposing more of it lately lol… shout out to anyone who recognizes the fic I’m referencing that I DID post lol.

Anyway. Copy pasted from my Google docs:

Idia’s computer pinged as a message appeared on screen.

C.Dia - eppa, are u awake?

Idia looked at the clock, startled. It was 3AM… Idia was still up because he was grinding a new event in one of his many, many, many games, but what the heck was Cater Diamond doing up at this hour? Had he just gotten back from a party?

PrinceEppa: ya, why r u tho? It’s crazy late lol

C.Dia: lol ikr

C.Dia: i just cant sleep rn >.<

PrinceEppa: how come?

C.Dia: i got into a fight w/my bf again…

Idia sighed at his computer. Right… Cater’d started dating that prettyboy from RSA.

PrinceEppa: 0~0 thats like the third time this month…

C.Dia: ya ik ;-;

Idia fiddled with the strings on his hoodie. He didn’t really know if his heart could take hearing Cater talk about another guy, but the thought of Cater laying around sad and alone made him ache just as bad… But what was he supposed to say in times like these? Idia didn’t know anything about comforting someone about relationships! He barely talked to people in general!

Thankfully, Cater kept going and spared Idia the anguish of trying to figure out what to do next.

C.Dia: are u going to bed rn?

PrinceEppa: no lol ill be up for a while longer.

C.Dia: royalty keeps busy at all hours huh?

Idia tensed at the mention of his lies.

PrinceEppa: something like that. Balancing the princely duties and the princely gamer sessions is tough work 😌

C.Dia: LOL. never change eppa <3

His face grew warm, a bittersweet swelling filling his chest.

C.Dia: can u chat with me a lil longer then?

C.Dia: tell me about ur day or ur games or w/e? I kinda just want a distraction, i dont really wanna be alone rn

C.Dia: if ur not busy anyway >.< it’s oki if you wanna focus on ur gamer mode lololol

Idia paused for a moment, before moving his mouse and closing out of his game. The rest of the event grind could wait.

PrinceEppa: im never too busy for you, cay.

C.Dia: thx <3

Sometimes, even for the prince of otakus, there were more important things than gaming…

But only when those things were really, really, really special.

*

“I heard Cater and that RSA boyfriend of his broke up.” Azul spoke after several minutes of silently moving chess pieces around the board.

Idia frowned. “Don’t try and use that as a distraction from the game just because I’m winning.”

Azul kept his face neutral so as not to betray any bluff he might have. “Perish the thought. I just thought his sweet prince eppa would be interested in such information.”

“SHH!” Idia hissed. “Not so loud! Besides, I-I already know. He told me…”

Azul raised an eyebrow. “He told you, or he told Eppa?”

Idia focused on the chess piece he moved. “Same thing.”

Azul sighed as he took his own piece and contemplated his next move. “Hardly. Honestly, how can you ever expect to move your relationship forward if you don’t unmask yourself? All this bonding will be for nothing if you don’t use it to the full extent!”

Idia rolled his eyes. “I don’t wanna hear it from you of all people. How long have you been saying you’re gonna ask Jamil out?”

It was Azul’s turn to shush Idia, face reddening. “How is that even relevant?!”

Idia grinned. “Cuz you keep going on and on to me about how I should be more confident with Cater, but you won’t even take the plunge with Jamil! Hypocrisy much?”

“I’m simply waiting for the right time. I would be a fool if I didn’t stick with my patient strategy of getting him to warm up to me before striking! Move too early, and I’ll undo all my progress…”

Idia sighed, thinking back to all the hours he’d spent DMing Cater under a fake name. They’d gotten quite close, but as far as Cater knew, Idia was still that vague acquaintance in the back of his classes.

If he messed up by telling him his identity at the wrong moment, or didn’t phrase it right…

“Lost progress… that’s exactly what I’m afraid of…”

*

“Idia!” Cater’s cheerful voice called out as he approached the lecture hall desks. “You’re in person again today; that’s three for three this week!” He spoke with a smile as he slid into the seat next to Idia.

Idia jumped at the sudden appearance of his classmate. “O-oh, uh, yeah…”

“Oh, B-T-W, did you hear that Azul and Jamil were on a date Friday night?” Cater said in a half-whisper, leaning close to Idia’s ear.

“Uhh…” Idia didn’t really know how to answer that. Sure, he knew Azul had some overly complicated date-but-not-a-date plan to get Jamil to hang out with him, and then ask him out for real, but how did Cater hear about…?

“I was hangin’ out with the pop music club on Friday when Ruggie texted Kalim that he was serving their table! Isn’t that just crazy?”

Ah. Kalim and Ruggie. That explained it all.

“I mean, I always wondered if those two had something goin’ on, y’know? Like, they had that ‘will they, wont they, playing hard to get’ kind of vibe. Super cute, if you ask me.”

Idia wasn’t really sure that ‘cute’ was a good way to describe anything those two were involved in, but he simply nodded his head along to Cater’s blathering, as he discreetly pulled his phone out of his pocket and switched to his Prince Eppa magicam account, reading the messages from that morning.

PrinceEppa: howre u feeling?

C.Dia: like total trash lol…..

C.Dia: ik he was a jerk but like i miss him, yknow??

C.Dia: or maybe i just miss having someone there. And its almost valentines day lol. Shit timing amirite?

PrinceEppa: that really does suck… im sorry, cater.

C.Dia: thanks, it’s oki tho. Better to get it overwith lol

C.Dia: i really dont wanna get out of bed or go to class…

PrinceEppa: mood

PrinceEppa: u really should tho. Ik it’s hard but itll feel worse if u stay there all alone

C.Dia: urk. Idk if i have the energy to be around people today

PrinceEppa: tbh i get that… i dont rlly wanna go face people either today…

PrinceEppa: how about we try it together?

C.Dia: i wish u went to my school so we really could go to class together <3

C.Dia: but oki. I'll try, for you :)

PrinceEppa: :)

If Cater really was feeling as bad as he felt, he was pretty good at hiding it with that blinding smile and bubbly laughter.

Sure, Idia’s first instinct would be to immediately enable anyone that wanted to spend the day hiding in bed, but… The thought of Cater lying alone in the dark with his thoughts just made Idia sad.

And, if he did that, Idia wouldn’t get to see him in class today…

“Oooh, do you think Azul and Jamil are gonna go out again on Valentine’s day?”

That depends on what Jamil answered on Azul’s questionnaire, Idia thought to himself. He was sure he’d get a full report from Azul later that day at their next club meeting.

Cater sighed. “Another Valentine’s day, and Cay-Cay’s single yet again!” He smiled, but Idia felt that his eyes weren’t lit as bright as they normally were as he spoke. “But, I’m sure some of the boys at Heartslabyul will be hangin’ around like always. It’s never lonely when you live with friends!” He turned to face Idia again. “What about you, Idia? Any steamy plans for Valentine’s day?”

“U-uh…” Idia started fiddling with his hair. It was now or never. ‘A-Actually, Cater… M-my dorm, Ignihyde, we’re h-hosting a movie night that night… Y’know, ‘cause a lot of us don’t really have plans for Valentine’s day and don’t wanna be sulking alone…” He swallowed a lump in his throat and took a deep breath. “...Y-you can come join, i-if you want…?”

Cater blinked a few times, a look of surprise on his face, before breaking into a smile and giving Idia’s arm a small squeeze of a hug. “OMG, movie night at Ignihyde?! I hear you guys have like, the sickest setup! That sounds great; count me in!”

Idia breathed a sigh of relief as the professor began class.

A few seconds in, his phone quietly vibrated as a single message came through. Idia glanced at it from down in his jacket pocket.

C.Dia: a rlly sweet guy in my class just invited me to hang out w/him and his dormmates on valentines day

C.Dia: u were right about getting out of bed. i think ill be okay today ^.^

***

“Hey, Idia…” Cater put his phone down, magicam abandoned where he’d paused on a video of a turtle swimming around an aquarium. “We’ve gotten a bit closer lately, huh?”

Idia paused the game he had up on his tablet. “H-huh? Oh, uh, y-yeah…”

“So, uh,” Cater played with a strand of his hair. “Do you mind if I talk to you about something a little… personal?”

Idia froze. Abort mission, find an escape route, he was not a high enough level for this kind of topic yet! Maybe Eppa was, but Idia!?

And yet, he couldn’t bring himself to just say no when Cater was looking at him with those soft green eyes.

“S-sure…”

“Thanks! Y’know, you’re really sweet, and like, such a good listener…”

Idia hoped the redness of his face was hidden behind the flames of his hair that flickered in every direction.

“And I’ve just been feeling so… confused lately, about where my heart’s at. My feelings feel like they’re being pulled in so many different directions!”

Idia could feel his heart hammering in his chest.

Cater sighed, laying his head down on the table. “My ex asked me on a date today. He wants me to give him another chance.”

The burning sensation from Idia’s insides made a 180 as he felt his blood go cold. This was the last thing he wanted to hear his normie crush come and tell him without warning…

“And the craziest part? I said I’d think about it.”

Oh god.

“I know that’s like, totally insane after everything that happened, but… I dunno, seeing him around now that he goes to school here just has my head all scrambled!” He picked his head up from the table, opened his phone again, and gave the turtle video a like before standing back up suddenly. “Gosh, sorry, I don’t know why I just came over here and dumped that on you, Idia. I guess I just find you so easy to talk to, I get a little carried away!” He said with a nervous laugh.

Lucky Idia.

“But, don’t worry about it. I’ll figure things out for myself. It’ll be A-okay!” Cater gave an unconvincing thumbs up before turning to leave.

Super lucky.

*

“Azul, today might actually be the worst day of my life.” Idia said as he dragged himself into the clubroom and plopped down in the seat across from Azul in their usual spot.

“...Hm? Oh, hello, Idia.” Azul looked up from his phone. “I believe you said the same thing when you came in here to lament about Cater getting together with his… boyfriend, a while back.” Azul seemed tense at the very concept of Danarte. He hadn’t exactly been a fan of the guy since he transferred to not just NRC, but into Scarabia specifically, where he’d made a point to hover around Kalim and Jamil as much as possible.

“I mean, it’s basically the same level of despair. Cater just told me Danarte not only asked him out, but that he’s considering it!” Idia dropped his head facedown onto the table in sorrow. “Like, how could I lose to the same guy twice!? Ugh, honestly, there’s no one as pathetic as me. I am having the WORST time, and NO ONE could possibly understand the agony I’m in right now!”

Azul chuckled, his tone solemn and hollow. “I’ll do you one better. Jamil broke up with me today.”

Wait, what?

Idia’s head shot up as he squinted at Azul, who was gazing sadly at his phone again. “Huh!? Wh- Huh!? What happened?”

Azul sighed. “We had another fight- and I mean, you know how we are. We have our differences, our disagreements, and the two of us can be a bit… stubborn at times. But we always figure it out! We were doing so well… At least, I thought we were.” Azul rested his chin in his hands. “But I suppose Jamil didn’t feel that way. He said he’d had enough of the relationship. Enough of me.”

Azul bowed his head to stare down at the table.

Idia wondered if he was trying not to cry. He looked out the window, both out of respect, and also because it felt kind of awkward to stare at his friend who was clearly just barely holding it together after getting dumped.

After a few seconds of awkward silence, when it was clear neither of them wanted to discuss their woes anymore, Idia spoke. “Uh, wanna play the VR headset boardgames today? Now’s kinda the perfect time to… Escape reality, right?”

Azul lifted his gaze to Idia. “...You just want to make me use the virtual dice again because you know I can’t use my perfected dice strategy on them, don’t you?” He straightened his posture, standing up to get the headsets. “I’ll have you know I won’t let your silly game of virtual chance best me today!”

Oh thank god that worked. Idia didn’t think either of them could handle any more emotions for the day, so he stood up and followed Azul with a grin. “Hehe, we’ll see about that, Azul.”

[csvent-2]

BOY do I have a story for you. Okay. Lets talk Nyudoodles, Howltars and Liowlets. Going straight to the point (ASK ME QUESTIONS FOR CLARIFICATION BC I CANT WORD THINGS CORRECTLY) 1. I was immediately banned/blacklisted from Nyudoodles bc I apparently was “block evading” according to one of the mods WITHOUT any evidence other than my account not having enough ocs or art (I already explained to them why I didn’t have many mind you tho I understand wanting to be safe as I have BEEN stalked before esp irl.) number 2. Blocked from Liowlets bc apparently I “made artists uncomfortable” and tht there was a “beware public post” about me. I’m like.. HUH?! Am I that known? Btch I’m in no way shape or form known or a popular artist 💀 where is this coming from? I asked the mod if it’s bc of ‘that’ mod that blacklisted me from Nyudoodles they said they have NO idea who that is and etc etc yada yada (I won’t say their name for now(the mod from Nyudoodles, they’re also in Howltars, but unless you want me to say the nams. They’re popular as an artist has cute designs.) 3. Banned from Howltars. One day I go on discord and then see that I’ve been banned?? It says bc I “impersonated” you guessed WHO that mod. It’s always been that one mod from Nyudoodles. I asked the owner Nyudex what happened. They began to show me sc of.. apparently the “public post” ab me WITHOUT revealing the name. And it looks like it’s from Amino or something? (Probably the same mod as they’ve always had a problem with me.) Next an instagram account of someone impersonating the mod AND screenshots of the mod from Liowlets and the chat we had. Now.. I was banned from Howltars bc of “impersonation, harassment?? And apparently block evading.” I’m now here realizing I am not the problem, since reading that the Nyudoodles staff go at each others throats, get jealous over others designs, ripoff designs and are toxic in general PLUS I’ve read somewhere that a guest artist/used to be mod(s) have mentioned their experiences with the staff overall and they were stressed and etc. (will not mention them incase ya’ll try to come after them smh for “outing” you out.”) This has been my experience with these 3 overall. I wouldn’t be surprised of how many people either hate, dislike or come after them as there’s been a LOT of people blacklisted for no reason at all other than coincidences, wording, bidding lower, edited comments on bids, people who are busy and can’t reply yet etc etc. if there’s any questions bc you wanna clarify lmk. I didn’t share all the details. But fr I would advise staying away from them. They treated me like I’m not a person. I even shared why it’s unfair they did what they did esp since there’s 0 evidence of anything other than wording. Which shows and means nothing. Oh also. That mod that one mod (and possibly their friends) is STILL trying to search for something, anything to link me as the person from their blacklist, but they’re like “yoUrE obSeSsed wiTh tHem” according to what Nyudex said to me. I’m like.. again HUH?! Btch I barely know your mod friend! We’ve never interacted or talked, plss they won’t even talk to me to clear things up lmfao. I asked if it’s possible to talk but nop. Gurly wants to keep living in delulu land. In no way, shape or form am I obsessed with them but I can see how you’re projecting on me bc you want to find some type of evidence that I’m the person from your blacklist. Oh and if they read this broo. You are projecting and I figured it out, clear as day. You’re projecting your literal fear and possibly guilt and don’t wanna accept that YOURE the problem and that you’re wrong. You keep coming after me, keeping an eye on me AND try to sneak friends in servers that I’m in to keep an eye on me. Or they’re sneaking for you. Smh. Telling others to grow up when you’re not acting grown sis.

🌸

[mentelosse]

Questions/Answers about Mentelossë

@yellow-faerie asked me A LOT of questions on the Tolkien OC discord server ! here a little transcription of our exchange to keep track about everything Mentelossë related on this blog !

Question 1 - how did Mentë and Glorfindel meet?

They met in Gondolin for sure, Glorfindel being a lord and Mentelossë being Turgon niece. However they truly got to know each other because Mentelossë was going out in secret and exploring the city, he found out and decided she needed company and safety ! They visited the city and the valley and rode horses and talked and did very dumb things while trying to make everyone else think they barely knew each other at formal events (Idril and Ecthelion are not that dumb tho, and find out pretty quickly). Mentelossë previously lived in Fingons fortress city during the siege of Angband so not very fun for a child and a young lady, so coming to Gondolin gave her a lot of freedom and she really wanted to go out and explore and meet people !

Ohhh ok neat!! I didn't know she was in Gondolin at any point (makes sense tho, considering her husband) - I imagine his death must have been super upsetting for her! Did they get married in Gondolin then or after his reembodiment?

yaaaah ;-; she almost faded after the fall of Gondolin ! But they got married in Lindon when he came back to Middle Earth, they were just dating and then engaged in Gondolin

Ohhh ok!! Poor Mentë :( Who else did she spend time with in Gondolin then? And just generally - who are her friends over her life?

She was a very lonely child, only surrounded by soldiers etc even her mother was very VERY distant. She mostly spent her time with her father when he had time or maids and sometimes Fingolfin. She took care of her little brother when he was really little but that didn't last long since when Gil Galad was sent to be with Cirdan, she went to Gondolin. In Gondolin she spent her time with Idril mostly and other ladies ! She loves to make friends. Then she goes to Sirion and stays friend with pretty much the same people. When she lives with Maedhros, Mags and the twins she grows close to them but has trouble to make friends with other feanorians there (no feanorian hate, I just hc the mood to be very very very down during this part of the story). It's in the Second Age where she meet her best friends. She really gets along with her brother (she's basicaly meeting him as an adult), Celebrimbor, Celebrian, Erestor, Cirdan, other OCs of mine that I never drew XD And she stays really close to Elrond of course ! In the third age she gets closer to the few Noldor still living in Rivendell like an OC who is a former smith follower of Celebrimbor who swore to never forge or use a sword again

Oooh fascinating!! How does she end up with the feanorians at the end of the first age then?

She went back for Elrond and Elros (had to kill an elf: traumatic event, "am I doomed now ?) Tried to attack Maglor which was brave but dumb and she did it out of anger but Maedhros managed to stop her. She used to see him very often during her childhood (guess why 👀 😏 ) and used to love him a lot.

Ohhhh complicated feelings that come from Russingon - JUICY

Also Mentelossë understands that Maedhros was NOT here only on diplomatic mission very late 😂

LMAO I'm cackling at the idea of someone just like being…real gentle and like…Mentë….Mentë Maedhros did not need to be there that much They weren't just friends Mentë

(we continue to talk about how Russingon works in this headcanon and how naive Mente was)

I also hc that there's like rumoooors about the both of them. Stable boys, maids, servants etc making dirty jokes

They're talking and Mentë is like I'm so glad my dad had such a good friend in Maedhros. And everyone is like *deep breath * TALKING ABOUT PARENTS Do Glorfindel and Mentë ever have kids, or are they a kids in the far future when everything is safe (or no kids at all) kinda couple? (also how does she get on with her parents-in-law??)

No they never have kids but they tried, a lot, because they're horny and because they really strike me as people who just LOVE children ! Especially Glorfindel ! I like it to be unexplained but in truth it's because it's something really spiritual to procreate for elves, and it can be very straining and Mentelossë's fëa is too damaged and strained by everything that happened and her almost fading. And also I think she wants children but is unconsciously afraid that they are going to live the same fate as all the children she knew, being separated from their parents or unloved however elves need to WANT children to have them.

I can't imagine Glorfindel's parents something other that SUPER KIND and happy people who like to do good around them, Glorfindel's kindness and positivism come from them ! They have a nice relationship and they're happy to have a new member in their family ❤️ I hc that they never went to middle earth and Mente meets them when she leaves for Valinor and they have a HUGE family (I need Glorfindel to have sisters.)

Ahh ok so it's kinda big and tragic - but I guess this means the both of them (Mentë and Glorfy) are the super aunt and uncle to all their friends kids

EXACTLY ! They're pretty sad in the beginning but come to terms with it when it's obvious it's not going to happen

There was also a lot more idiocies ;) Thank you very much dear for expressing so much interest in my girl <3

[i-am-beckyu]

AKDNDKDKJFKSKDF IVE BARELY SENT ANYTHING HERE LATELY IM SO SORRY BECKY!!!!

How is you? :] I is tired, it’s night time, tho I don’t feel like sleeping yet-

Your birthday fic is coming along, I will probably have it done by your birthday, if I balance homework and life right… Let’s have a snippet!

…

The borrower heard an irritated sigh, and, sure enough, when he looked up there was his escort and best friend, ———.

…who, as he looked closer, seemed ready to murder him. ——— gulped, and tried to play it off casually.

…

I hope you’re excited! And I also have actually started, and have a decent idea for my 100 followers fic (THANK YOU 3D)

I maaay have taken some inspiration from your 100 followers fic, even most of its original, if you see somethings that seems like MMTS, then I hope you don’t mind :]

Also, randomly, I don’t think anyone’s seen this, but I’ve actually been going around becoming peoples evil, shadow clone counter part (I have way too many side blogs at this point) *cough* anybodywritingao3 *cough* Rose if you see this no you didn’t

So… On a completely unrelated note, what would your evil shadow self be? What would their pfp and username be? :D

also can I ask why everyone’s putting their pfp underwater and how do I join the trend I have no idea how to do that qwq

This ask is getting pretty long, uh, I hope you don’t mind….

I’d like to talk to you more, but I don’t want to bother you :]

(and in an earlier ask you said that I can just message hi in the family discord but that’s basically not possible for me cause I have something called being social anxious around people I find amazing and cool :P)

Okay okay I’ll stop the ask now-

Have a nice day/night if you’d like too!

Cookies? 🍪🍪🍪🍪🍪

-✨anon✨

HIIIIIIIIII ✨ANON✨

All good all good! I was pretty flat out as it was yesterday and on the weekend. Pretty much played power wash simulator irl cleaning lol.

And I'm good! I hope you slept well (because you should def be asleep right now as of posting this) I'm a bit tired just cause of all the work I did but otherwise feeling good. ❤️

S N I P P E T

*eats snippet and gets the happy chemicals* oOooOo am so EXCITED FOR THIS FIC!!! BORROWER FIC! BORROWER FIC! LETS GOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! Bu tbut but but as I know everyone is telling you, make sure to not over work yourself and take breaks. You don't have to force yourself to finish any of these fics on time if it means you get some extra sleep or finish the homework you have to do. Sleep being the most important of all things. Not saying you can't do things, just keep a healthy balance <3

and awwwwwww. My MMTS fic has inspired you're own 100 follower special? 🥹🥹🥹🥹 I don't mind at all!!! If anything it makes me extra excited cause it gives me a very vague idea of what the special fic could be centering on (putting bets on a monster meets found family times lol)

@nobodywritingao3 can you please drown @munchkin1156 next? They wanna be part of drowned squad :3

And this ask isn't long at all! You're more than welcome to come chat anytime and as long as you like. You're not bothering me at all <3 Also I get the discord feeling a bit daunting, but I promise everyone is really nice and we're all just a bunch of weird anxious beans that vibe lol.

You're more than welcome to just chat in private dms tho too. Whether it's on discord or tumblr dms, if you'd like to just chat rather than through asks, you're more than welcome to message me. I respond as quick as I can but life and lifing sometimes and can make response time slow lol.

Thank you for the kind wishes, I'm having a lovely morning so far and I hope you have a lovely day too.

Thanks for the cookies! Lollipops? :3 🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭🍭

[rose022]

Okay 150 questions I will just pick random numbers

8 21 32 38 64 77 83 106 108 122 135 148

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

uhm. well my gender doesnt really have an opposite and i dont thibk anyone is particularly on my mind rn other than my friends. uh 2/3 have a tumblr and one hasnt posted like anything since ive been following him so. theyre cool tho i love them

21. What are you bad habits?

i bite my nails and skin a lot i think. i also forget to do stuff a lot. even whrn i really have been meaning to do it. uh theres a lot more but idk rn

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

. ik u chose these randomly but. wow. thats a. sure a question. ... i mean i am an adult so uh. assuming they were ok with it uh. nihachu and uh. miura ayme? idk those are the only two celebrities i can think about. that. with. weird question. uhm. maybe i shouldve just opted out (<- still writing)

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

i really like black hair. not super taller than me that i cant reach. likes me a lot super duper much. understanding when im unwell. good with physical affection. uhm idk

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

oh gods. okay. uhm. wow. so uh. whvsoabdisjdbsbjqbfisbfkabdjendifdh. so it was late october 2020 and we were having a sleepover at my house (yes ik we were being bad abt the lockdown, its been years shush) and uh i forget how it started or like what we were talking about beforehand but we were on my bedoom floor on the mattress i got for her and my mom and sister were asleep already i think cus it was like past midnight and uh. idrk. we were goofing around and nervous and we had some gum first and then idk?? got it over with?? her lips were so soft. and. afterwards she started talking about fish (she loves fish), specifically big mouth billy bass, yknow the one that moves and sings?? look it up. anyway it was great but i dont think she really cares anymore. its ok

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

I LOVE CHOCOLATE!!!!

83. Mean Girls or Mean Girls 2?

i havent seen the second so the first

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

gods i hope not but. fuck. maybe. haaahhh

108. What should you be doing?

sleeping soon i thibk. i will i promise...

122. Is cheating ever okay?

my go to thought for this question is about tests and yes. but for relationships no. just communicate whatever your problem is or break up. its not worth the alternative.

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

i dont remember. i barely remember anything ever. sorry </3

148. What’s your favourite quote?

i have a list on discord but. can i judt do the minecraft end poem? "and the universe said i love you because you are love". hey fun fact that's my senior quote

[foraltruism]

GET TO KNOW YOUR ADMIN !!

name — Rubii

pronouns — they/them

preferred comms — Discord, even though I'm kinda slow at first. I swear I'm really kinda shy when starting up conversations with people and awkward asf too, but once we get to chatting it's a lot easier. I also have ADHD and unfortunately people tend to fall into the "object permeance" section of the brain. Constantly talking to me and building a friendship means I'll be a lot more comfortable annoying you 👀

name of muse — I have 41 muses and you want me to name them all? 😭 Please check my caard for the 38 muses here, but I also have Megumi, Sukuna and Gojo on their own blogs.

experience in RP — I believe my journey in Rping started in 2014? Almost 10 years in total, but here on Tumblr I think it was in 2016 or 2017? I took a 2 year break though because back then Tumblr wasn't very good for me and my mental health, so I'm glad I did.

best experiences — Being a multi-muse blog for about majority of the time I've been on Tumblr I've been in multiple fandoms and met lots of people. Thus far, the most lively experience I've been enjoying myself in is the JJK fandom. There are so many fun loving and wonderful people in this fandom that's been making rping so much fun. There's also the Free fandom which I'm sad is not as active as it used to be but I've had plenty of fun and good experiences there too. Lastly the best experience was meeting my best friend of 5-6 years to whom I still keep in touch with to this day. She's my day one bestie and I love her so much 😭

pet peeves / deal breakers — I don't have many cause I'm pretty chill, but one thing I really dislike is interacting with someone who constantly complains about getting no attention. They talk negative a lot, vague post about people who interact with them but claim they're being ignored. Idk it's just a huge turn off. I understand that we get depressed or don't have many interactions or seem really small, but the passive aggressive posting ain't it for me.

muse preference ( fluff, angst, smut ) — All of it. I will write just about anything with my muses. It's the beauty of writing. Ofc if only my rp partner is comfortable with it. I'm kinda weak at fighting scenes with my strengths being in fluff and slice of life I suppose.

plot or memes — Both. Sometimes plots come easy, sometimes my brain is on vacation. Memes are fun for shorter threads or getting a plot started. I'm just versatile like that I guess.

long or short replies — Any. I don't care I'll make it work. I think the only thing that might bother me is writing something long and thought out and getting barely something in return often 💀

best time to write — When ever I'm not at work. It's not often or for long tho most of the time.

are you like your muse — Hmm, some of them? Some of them, but I wouldn't be able to pinpoint who 😂

Tagged: I stole

Tagging: Hahuhe everyone.

[merlwybs-wife]

might have a solution for marsnek going forward

i have this Ishgard AU version of Marsnek & I might just... gently swap out current canon Marsnek with his canon for the Ishgard AU.

further explanation & ramble below:

Currently in Marsnek's canon, when he was in his late 40s, he confronted his abusive husband he lived with in Ishgard and asserted he was leaving him. This resulted in the guy promptly trying to kill him, to which Marsnek managed to just barely escape with his life to flee to Kugane.

Given OOC stuff that has happened, all his current Threads were suddenly dropped. I don't have IC explanations atm. I get most of my RP from discord servers, and with Echelons being the primary one atm, it simply does not work for Marsnek. (The bulk of our population are Ishgardians, and Marsnek simply Will Not go into Ishgard).

But I have an AU where Marsnek killed his husband. And proceeded to become a serial black widower. I'm trying not to make hasty, impulsive decisions-- but this really appeals to me atm (tho knowing me I'll have decided in the next few days lmao). I found a way to keep his motifs/tropes/etc, and it lets me revisit a side of Marsnek I like a lot. Namely, his more neutral evil iteration as opposed to the true neutral he's become.

The idea I've come up with, thanks to a good friend, involves Marsnek having killed his husband-- but failed to do a very good job vetting his cleaners. It's kinda funny, because Marsnek doesn't mind blood & death-- his laziness & unwillingness to exert himself is what does him in. One cleaner ends up being really big in Ishgard's criminal syndicate (of which I will probably name and develop lore for), but he doesn't realize this until a few years later when they "come to collect."

This individual blackmails Marsnek, likely taking control of his finances. Tries to make a profit off of his hobby/profession of traveling "tours" to perform burlesque, while also using him for political favors in the Pillars. He thusly becomes a "syndicate asset/value/property" type thing, and obviously can't kill this guy because then an entire syndicate would be after him. Consequently, whenever he leaves Ishgard for a brief period of time, he is attended by "guards" who are more just retainers/handlers who make sure he doesn't try to slip through their fingers and wiggle away.

One thing I adore about this, is he'd still be a black mage & void-tainted, and he'd be right under the nose of the inquisitors. The potential for subtle-handed nuance fits so well with the Regency themes in Echelons.

The more I talk about it, the more I want to do this. I'm just. AHHH

[thatscottster24]

@chaoticjos28 is my Alt! I made it bc I got locked out of my main Google acc lmao

Hello, my name's Josie and I'm your normal aroace teenager! I write stories, draw, and make characters! I am a demigirl and go by she/they pronouns.

I'm also currently dabbling in music and FNF modding :3

PLEASE READ MY CARRD BEFORE INTERACTING PLEASE AND THANK YOU.

Key to my tags:

- #josies queue bc i'm lazy - Queued posts and reblogs

- #josie's character chaos - OC stuff, usually shitposts

- #josie art josie art - Art tag

- #F-For me? 🥹 - Fanart tag

- #rambling to the wall - Random rambling/text posts that don't fall into the lower two categories

- #welcome to rant corner - Negative rants and vents about my life. here so u can filter it out :3

- #checking the mailbox 📬 - Answered asks! Sometimes I will forget my inbox exists tho (<- on mobile)

Social Links:

Discord Server (feel free to join, it's kind of dead though)

YT Channel (I barely post here)

Twitter (barely active)

Artfight

Toyhou.se (For all of my characters!)

Reddit (barely active due to the blackout, only still have it bc there's a few subreddits I desperately need as lore + info obtainers)

Pinterest

Ao3/Archive of Our Own (I use this for stories, you'll need a registered account on there to access them though)

Wattpad (For the peoples who don't have Ao3 accounts that want access to my stories and fics)

Art Blog (because I want my art to get more traction and not buried in my reblogs)

General Art Tag

Stories that I am currently writing (clicking on the names leads to their story masterposts!)

Doki Doki Expanded (DDLC OC Story)

Friday Night Funkin': Fandom Crossover/FC

Friday Night Funkin' Void-Sides

Friday Night Funkin' Highlights

The Protectors

Neverending Nightmares (+ After-Story)

The Experimental Journals

Cross Console Clash (crossover AU between Deltarune, FC, and Neverending Nightmares)

Among Us: Crew 1429

Current Fandoms (you'll see a lot of reblogged art, stories and other stuff of these, as well as my own fanart for it as well)

FNF (currently one of my main fandoms and hyperfixations)

Undertale/Deltarune

Doki Doki Literature Club!

Anything Minecraft related (albeit barely, I'm very much involved in the fandoms there)

Voidpet

Undertale Yellow

I am known by my friends for making way too many OCs (earning the title of 'The OC Collector') and am also angst hungry as I am always traumatizing said characters

Feel free to send me asks of my characters, I really enjoy talking about them :3

NOTE ON ASKS: I have anon off as to prevent creeps from getting away with saying weird shit and not getting blocked. It hasn't happened yet but I'm using it as a safety measure so if you're more comfortable with anon I am sorry ;-;

[chronicallyonlinecath]

Saturday 17th June 2023 - The Start of a Summer

Well, exams are over now. I'm free!! Some people still have exams next week though - only until the 21st. But I'm done. I'm out of there, of school.

At least until the 21st, when I'm going in for the school's windband because the concert is soon as hell and I've barely been to any rehearsals because of revision.

My half term like two weeks ago was interesting - I apologize for not talking about it sooner. In short, Mattson apologised about everything, ever, and now we're friends again. I have mixed feelings about it though - it feels like all the pain I went through after he left was for nothing. We talk now - his favourite movies are romcoms, he wishes he was born in the late 90s and he's sad we've left school because there are lots of things he's going to miss that he's never going to do or see again. I think we all feel like that.

I certainly do.

After all that, one time I was walking home with him, Harvey and Alison and I mentioned I've liked Janek for a while and never had the guts to ask him out. Mattson decided to play wingman and get me to ask Janek out.

Well, I agreed to it. I'm mad at myself for being so easily pressured into it, but I think and plan so damn fast and then overthink the hell out of it. So, on Tuesday, my last maths lesson sat next to Janek ever, I slipped him a note. On it said I thought he was a cool and chill guy and if he wanted to hang out over the summer.

He replied to me on discord that evening saying "I'm not sure."

It's not a no... but I haven't had a reply since, and Harley sent a message to him thru my phone last night asking if he wanted to hang out this weekend. Still no reply.

Since we basically finished yesterday, Matty held a pool party at theirs for the whole council to go to - Harley, Peter, Carter, Bella, Harry, Reagan and Angel, one of Harley's super chill friends who I went on a trip in year seven with. Matty's little brothers were there as well, and it was super fun.

We tried playing chicken jousting with me on Bella's shoulders and Reagan on Matty's, but we decided it probably wasn't smart as the pool definitely wasn't safe. Reagan dumped me in the water by picking me up bridal style and then simply dropping me, and from then on I was fucking freezing. Harry became a swamp monster and chilled in the pool for at least an hour, just vibing in a donut and telling me how I should deal with the Janek situation (and then Harley messaged Janek for me)

Bella was an absolute demon in the pool the whole time and there's a hilarious photo of her looking like she's gonna steal your soul at any second.

My signed shirt has doodles from her all over it lmao- a bit like my primary school signed shirt as well. Matty's party was seriously great though, and I hope at some point the lot of us will be able to meet up again before we get to college in September.

Today, I have done literally nothing except stare at the "Hi" message I got from Sheldon, of whom I cut off in January, and question what the hell he wants.

I sent a reply, simply stating "give me a good reason to trust you and maybe we can talk"

A compromise, of sorts. Because frankly, I don't trust a weasel who can't respect my boundaries. But I've learnt from Mattson that people can somewhat change.

Somewhat.

I'll be back tomorrow, probably doing nothing again. I do need to go thru all my old shit to make room for my shit for college tho - so that's basically my plan for this afternoon.

~CM

[mpathicoracle]

ooookayyyy time to copy/paste my VERY lengthy rant about my TOH Bard oc, Eira Bane. originally sent it to my friend on discord, at the time i didnt realize it was so lengthy oops but hey yknow what. get used to it, yall get to deal with my bs no matter what LOL

first of all, lemme introduce: Harbinger Inferno, and its band members.

Eira Bane (they/them), creator, lead singer and guitarist. Hexside graduate. looks super threatening and intimidating, but they're such a sassy lil shit and is truthfully a massive dweeb.

Eran Thorne (he/him), secondary vocals and guitarist. St. Epiderm's graduate. he and Eira get along very well, are close like siblings but tease the media because celebrity drama likes to make it seem like they're dating. they both find it hilarious and joke about it constantly.

Dartak Heathers, bass guitarist. St. Epiderm's graduate. has a special Bard talent of being able to hear "melodies" for everyone, sorta a synesthesia type gift. he's also a mega dork

Belak Strande, drums. Hexside graduate. he...doesn't talk much, but he's super chill. an amazing cook tho, he enjoys cooking for the other three.

okay now youve met them, time to rant. fuck this is gonna be lengthy i apologize long in advance. n o t mwahaha

Eira's family name is Harbane. They're a very long line of witches, of a lot of different specialities. Primarily, a lot of Harbanes end up having stronger Oracle magic. Eira has an older brother (5 years older and a captain in the Emperor's Coven) and a younger sister (about 10 yrs younger). Eiras father is an Abomination witch, their mother an Oracle, both part of their respective covens. Both of their grandparents, the heads of their family, I haven't exactly decided what magic is their speciality, but they're powerful. Lastly is their great-grandfather, who passed away at 98 when Eira was barely 16; he had dementia, was practically deaf, and partially blind.

The Harbane family line have a very specific magical talent that they're most known for. One ancestor named it the Death Shout, another the Banshee Shriek. Its unknown how the Harbane ancestry got the gift, it's theorized amongst the family members that the Titan gifted it to them, but no one knows for sure. Throughout the generations of Harbanes, each "user" of the Scream, as its simply titled, used it various different ways. The ancestor who had it last called it the Death Shout, due to him having been able to raise the dead with it. That was nearly 800 yrs before Eira was born. The family line never understood why no one had so-called "received" the Scream since then. When Eira was born tho, her cries could crack glass, and their family realized they had the Scream. Their great-grandfather properly named them Eralynne, having once told them their name meant "the one who sings." Which is incredibly ironic. Eira's strongest magic is actually Construction magic, and as they grew older and practiced their Scream, they realized that, depending on the pitch/depth, they could either raise ground with the Scream, or absolutely decimate it. They also learned the hard way not to use the Scream indoors and almost damaged their eardrums once. Woops.

The final thing the Harbane family are known for is the ancient Harbinger Raven Palisman that has been passed down for generations upon generations. A Harbinger Raven is the symbol of their family, and its how they got their name. There's another theory amongst the family that Corva was probably one of the first Palisman ever made. But, again, no one knows for sure. and Corva sure as hell refuses to confirm nor deny it. She's a stubborn thing, but incredibly wise and, honestly, a bit of a smartass.

Harbinger Ravens are, as I decided, an extinct type of raven. One myth is that they were the first ones with Oracle magic, and taught it to the first witches. They were much larger than the average raven, and their key distinction is their oily-black feathers and their piercing, vibrant purple eyes (sclera and all).

Corva looks precisely like that, aside from the fact that she's not that big. Probably the size of a human realm crow, really. still a decent size. Corva, as stated, as been passed down through the Harbane ancestry, choosing on her own whether to take the next owner or not. When Eira was 11, it was meant to be her older brother's turn, his ceremonious ritual amongst the family to see if Corva would choose him. Instead, she eyed Eira almost instantly and flew to her instead. She didn't even give Eira's brother a single glance, not even a side eye. Just flew to Eira, who caught her easily, and cradled herself in the kid's arms. Eira's great-grandfather was the only one amused by it.

Now... there's a reason Eira doesn't go by the family name anymore, instead shortening it (out of spite) to just Bane. this part. is gonna take a while djfjg might switch to my laptop instead o o f

When Eira was maybe 10 or 11, their great-grandfather took them to the market with him, wanting to get them out of the house for a bit. I haven't really decided how they found it, hell it coulda been at Eda's "human collectibles" stand, but either way they found a music cd with a variation of different metal bands from the human realm. They begged their great-grandfather to get it for them, already having a love for music at that age, and he of course agreed and got it for them. When Eira got home and listened to it for the first time, they fell in love. Deep, raw emotion compiled into people screaming into microphones with heavy drums and epic guitars? Absolutely-freaking-yes. The next time they went to the market, they bought their first lute.

Eira's parents and grandparents weren't as understanding as their great-grandfather. They thought Bard magic was pointless, and a waste of talent. They weren't fans of music, not really. So Eira tried their hardest to hide their first lute from them. Sadly their older brother found out, and snitched to their mother... who broke the lute in front of the entire family, with Eira of course present. Eira soon bought another lute, still practicing in secret, and the next time their family found out, they yelled at them that they wanted to be a Bard, that they wanted to make music and that they could learn to incorporate the family Scream into it. They were laughed at and, once again, their lute was broken. It was around this time their great-grandfather slowly began to lose it, dementia setting in. He understood his great-grandchild more than anything, but because he was no longer head of house at this point he couldn't make any decisions about it.

Eira's parents forced them into the Construction track at Hexside after, but that didn't stop Eira from sneaking into the Bard track homeroom and continuing to practice in secret.... the Bard track teachers knew, but they knew enough about Eira's family to not mention it to anyone.

Eira made the decision, at that point, that they didn't give a shit what anyone else wanted them to be. Nothing was going to stop them from being what they wanted to be. No one but them could tell Eira what to do. It was precisely that, that Corva chose them over their brother. Not quite stubbornness, but free-will and a desire to be more than what Corva had experienced with her past owners. Fighters, warriors, generals. All strong-willed, sure, but it was the same old thing time and time again. Corva wanted to feel the true Freedom of such a strong-willed witch such as Eira, and that's exactly what she saw in them.

Like I said, Eira's great-grandfather was the only one who was amused when Corva chose them at age 11, only a year after first discovering metal music. Their grandparents and parents were infuriated, their brother mad and hateful at them after that (he instead got a newer palisman carved, also a raven, but a regular one). Eira's father actually attempted to keep Corva from his kid, locking the palisman up for two straight days...until he got too close and Corva bit his hand, immediately flying back to the grieving kid (they thought they wouldn't see Corva ever again). Their parents didn't attempt that again, but it still made Eira's home life absolute hell. They stopped being close with the rest of their family at this point, keeping on the track of keeping things from them. They didn't leave their room much and lied a lot, saying they "took up an extracurricular with the Illusion track, which is why they were at school so long." Their parents and grandparents didn't question it.

When Eira was 13, roughly at the end of their 8th grade year, they and the other students in their grade at Hexside were given the option to switch tracks, and to start making plans for what coven they wanted to join when they graduated high school. Essentially, the conversation with their family went like this:

(Grandparents:) "You are going to continue the Construction track, or you're out of this family. Decide to join whatever coven you want, but if you even dare think about joining the Bards, you will not be a part of this family."

(Parents:) "Be like your brother. He's going to join the Emperor's Coven. They'll let you do whatever magic you want, our family Scream will be a blessing for the Emperor."

Eira, spiteful as they were, went to Principal Bump the next day and told him that they wanted to switch to the Bard track. They explained what their family will do, but that they didn't care. "They can do whatever the heck they want, but I refuse to let them make my life decisions for me. It's my Scream, it's my choice. And music is what I want," they had said. Something they always lived by. Bump understood, he knew, after knowing Eda Clawthorne, that kids these days were incredibly stubborn but formidable. So he agreed, and switched them to the Bard track. Eira kept it hidden from their brother on their trip home, but as soon as they got home they showed off the Bard track colors, a giant "fuck you" to their family. They were given one full day to pack their things and leave, and they did. It hurt, because they knew they wouldn't be able to see their great-grandfather ever again, but it meant they could do what they wanted.

Eira was, quite frankly, homeless for the next couple weeks, slowly making their way to where the majority of the Bard Coven witches lived, aka Harper's Haven (see my previous post lol). During those couple weeks, Bump had called Eira into his office to show them the official statement from their now ex-family that Eira was legally disowned and legally denied any access to their family records etc etc. They were... well. Let's just say Principal Bump wasn't surprised when things in his office got broken. Eira apologized for it, repeatedly, but he didn't hold it against them. He'd seen worse. They and Bump essentially made an agreement: if Eira could find a suitable place to live and a way to afford continuing learning at Hexside, he wouldn't make them leave the school. He couldn't let them keep learning there for free, school costs money; Eira knew this, of course, and Bump wasn't pleased about it, either, but the agreement was made.

Anyways, when Eira got to Harper's Haven, they wanted to be as close to the Bard Coven hq as possible, so they, a 14-year-old, walked into the Harper's Haven Hotel (Triple H), and immediately demanded to speak to the owner to ask about room and board, along with a job. They were raised rich, so their tone was all high-and-mighty, so the associate had quickly got the owner, Caric Thorne, a Construction witch.

After Eira explained their situation, Caric was incredibly sympathetic. It wasn't abnormal for high schoolers to get jobs (i.e. canonically Amity and the library job), so he wasn't against the idea. What he was against was that Eira was demanding a full-time job, something he couldn't allow a minor to have. Caric was relatively wealthy, though, having built Triple H from the ground up (literally), so he could vouch on Eira's behalf and partially pay for their schooling, which Eira begrudgingly accepted. Caric, Eira, and Bump made a deal: if Eira could keep their grades up, while also showing up to work on time and proving they can balance both school and work at "such a young age," there would be no issues with them doing both. And proved that to them, Eira did.

also cough at Caric's surname and Eran's surname lol

Now I would like to note a funfact: Eira is only 11 years younger than Raine and the rest of the canon adults (they're all in their early 40s). When Eira's 14, Raine wouldve only been in their mid-to-late 20s sdjghdg. ngl when Eira's 14 Raine and Eda would've only been broken up for a few years canonically. o o f the realization at that safgsjkgb

fast forward a couple yrs and Eira is still proving themself to both work and school. They ended up getting a loaner guitar from the Bard track, so they could practice outside of school. They found an empty space a couple miles outside of town, and made it their practice area, using construction magic to make their own stage and everything. They had gotten pretty damn good at playing guitar by the time they were 16, having learned the bass and drums as well. A straight-A student as well, and always on-time to work (considering they went to work as soon as school was done). Relatively easy when they live at the hotel, too, but still.

Not long after Eira's 16th birthday was the first covention they would've been able to attend, the first time they woulda been able to prove themself to the Bard Coven that their Scream could be incorporated into bard magic. But...alas...work got in the way. It was a busy week at Triple H, a Bard Coven concert just around the corner or something along those lines. So, instead of being able to attend, Eira wrote a letter and sent Corva off to deliver it to the coven head at the time, Scooter Crane.

the letter went as follows (mostly came up with this on the spot, but the concept of it has been sitting in my brain for a while):

"Head Witch Crane,

My name is Eira Bane, formerly Eralynne Harbane. I am 16 years old, and I inherited my family's infamous Scream. My family fully legally disowned me at age 13 when I told them I was going to be a Bard Witch whether they liked it or not. As proof I am who I say I am, I have sent my Palisman, Corva, as proof. She is, you'll recognize, a Harbinger Raven, and can tell you herself that I am who I say I am.

I, alas, cannot attend the covention due to work conflicts. Because I was kicked out of my family, I have had no choice but to work, along with attending school. I, at present, work at Harper's Haven Hotel, proudly and happily, in exchange for room and board. You may ask Mr. Caric Thorne about my work performance, and you may also ask Principal Bump for my school records.

I have wanted to be a musician since I was 10 years old. I have learned to play lute, guitar, bass, drums, and, of course, I can sing, since then. I have practiced using my family Scream and incorporating it into Bard magic, something no one in my family ancestry has ever done. I would be proud and incredibly glad to be accepted into the Bard Coven when I graduate from Hexside, if you'll allow me. However, there is one exception: I cannot be branded with the sigil. Because no one knows what power the Scream originates from, I cannot risk being branded with the Bard sigil, in the chance that I would no longer be able to use it with Bard magic.

I am more than willing to prove to you that the Scream can be tied into Bard magic, just tell me the time and place. Well... the place will have to be outdoors, naturally. If you accept this, you know where to find me.

-Eira Bane"

A few days later, during one of Eira's work shifts, Crane actually did send someone from the Bard coven to investigate...and who better than Raine Whispers themself. bc im seriously super self-indulgent and i love raine with all my heart asgfghjksghjkh

Just gonna summarize at this point, the two had a very long conversation...all while Eira, stubbornly, kept working. They weren't going to just stop working just to answer basic interview questions. The entire time, Raine was very deeply reminded of Eda. Both Eda and Eira were so incredibly stubborn, but very free-willed and, essentially, wild. It got Raine very intrigued into Eira's situation. By the end of Eira's shift, Raine had convinced Eira to show them were they practice, and Eira relented. While Eira was preparing in their room, Raine had contacted Crane and told him where to go, as a surprise to Eira. They wanted to prove themself to Crane, so what better time to do it?

At this point in Eira's life, they had made their first ever song, having recorded it both at school (instrumentals) and at their practice area (vocals). So when they brought Raine there, (they knew Crane was there, too, but didn't want to say anything as a joke at Raine, who was seriously not subtle about it), they set up everything but the central vocals and lead guitar, their strongest points. And perform they did-

https://youtu.be/dGl2qh7RXak (they use the Scream at 2:42 "You don't know me it's only what I let you see" not sure how to describe what it looked like, but just. yea. And yes, their vocal range is pretty wide. cuz why tf not djfjkdghk.)

Head Witch Crane was impressed with the performance, and another deal with Eira was made (behind raine's back, because raine was getting involved with it whether they liked it or not). If Eira could make a band by the time they graduate from school, and can further enhance their Scream into Bard magic, with training from a certain Bard Coven Witch cough Raine cough, then Crane would consider allowing Eira to be a Bard Coven Witch without the sigil. "I heard Caric's boy is wanting to join the Bard Coven as well, perhaps you should meet with him?" Crane had suggested, and, being the stubborn shit they were, Eira begrudgingly agreed.

By the end of their senior year, Eira had become close friends with Eran, who introduced them to Dartak, and Eira had found out Belak, who was in their grade at Hexside, was also into metal/hard rock, and was an incredible drummer. The group formulated the Harbinger Inferno, proudly using Corva as their mascot (who absolutely loved the idea and became an "integral" part of their band and performances). Eira explained how spiteful they were to their family, and the 3 boys immediately agreed to join in on the spite. By their Coven initiation, they had practically made an entire album setlist. I like to picture the Bard Coven initiation as a sort of talent show. They performed "True Colors", the first and best selling song. During the past year and a half, almost 2 years, Raine had officially become Eira's mentor, and was incredibly proud of Eira's band. Won't ever admit it to anyone, but still. Eira was their protégé, and proudly admits it any time they get the chance to. Scooter Crane was, again, greatly impressed by their progress and held up their end of the deal. Eira became the first and only Bard Coven witch to not have the sigil, instead having a formal pin that they keep on them at all times, something they're incredibly proud of. Not having the sigil meant they could be even more of a performer by incorporating other types of magic (mostly illusion magic) as well. Because they just have to be a show off.

Harbinger Inferno became famous, essentially. Got investigated by the Emperor's Coven a handful of times due to certain subjects of their songs, but they didn't get in any real trouble. They were sponsored by the Bard Coven after all. even more kudos to them when Raine became Head Witch for, like, a month or two.

Eira was hurt (emotionally) badly when the Day of Unity happened. They didn't have the sigil, they had to watch as their closest friends and fatherly figure Caric were being drained of their magic and actually hurt. When it ended, though, and the Collector took over the land, Harper's Haven was one of the first places that got hit. Luuuckily Eira was ready to kick some ass. They and their band, along with a handful of other witches, herded as many people as they could into the Bard Coven Center and Triple H to keep them safe. In the months that followed, Dartak had gotten Collected in the process of saving a group of stragglers. Thaaat def made Eira lose their shit. Fuck, they practically led an army of Bards and Construction witches after that, keeping Harper's Haven as safe as they possibly could. Even more so when belos took over the Titan's Heart and corrupted the land. Damn did their Scream come in handy. Then again, Eira learned from Raine how to use soundwaves as a way to manipulate surroundings, def comes in handy with the Scream. During that time, though Caric attempted to save a kid from some rubble, but because of his more elderly age and how weak he still was from the Draining Spell, he...didn't make it.

When everything was over, Harbinger Inferno led the effort in helping rebuild Harper's Haven...which really didn't take all too long. Triple H became a center for temporarily housing Harper's Haven's citizens. It was only a couple weeks after that Eira came up with the idea about the charity concert. And it gave them a good reason to get their grief out of their system by making the clearing they made as a teenager a lot bigger. r i p the trees lmao.

Anyways, by that point they're only 29 years old (roughly estimated Eda and Raine are 40. They def accomplished a fuckton of shit since they graduated from Hexside. and they like to rub it in Raine's face. a lot. "awwww Raine aren't you just so prooud of me, your protégé? heeeee" kinda shit. theyre an ass to raine at times and its totally worth it. Eira's "boys" - as they labeled Eran, Dartak and Belak - love playing along with it, too.

and if anyones curious, Eira used Corva to track down every single Bard witch possible to gather them for the first Bard Collective Charity Concert. Corva was ecstatic to track people down, she loves tracking. One of the Harbane ancestors had used her Oracle talents for the exact same thing. It's very fun, and incredibly freeing.

Bonus pics: Eira when they were younger!

Eira (Eralynne), age 13 (she/her)

Eira, age 14-17 (they/she)

Eira, age 18 (after joining the Bard Coven) (they/them)

Also more bonus, Harbinger Inferno's first album cover (which i just realized has an error and im gonna lose my shit) and the first album's songs (with listed credit for the actual bands who sing the songs lol) (peep the "Sponsored by the Bard Coven" in the bottom left corner lol)

"Now Let Them Tremble" (All That Remains) (all sing) "True Colors" (Wage War) (sung by Eira, Scream used) "Obey" (Bring Me The Horizon) (sung by Eira and Eran) (yes this song can be seen as a play at the emperor's coven bc thats exactly what its intended as heehee) "Pass The Nirvana" (Pierce The Veil) (sung by Eira, Scream can be used but not always) "Stitch" (Wage War) (sung by Eira) "Blood Runs Cold" (Rain City Drive) (sung by Eira) "Blood & Water" (Memphis May Fire) (sung by Eira, Scream used) "When Everything Means Nothing" (Fit For A King) (sung by Eran) "Ophelia" (Rain City Drive) (sung by Eran) "Bulls in the Bronx Hills" (Pierce The Veil) (sung by Eira, one of their most famous songs. partially renamed for Reasons)

please lemme know if u wanna know more about Eira and the band, i love them and owl house has given me such MASSIVE brainrot that theyre all i can focus on asgfsjghdjkghk h e l p