#I can't keep asking the same questions different ways and hoping for a different result each time

[applejarjar]

realizing I missed my window to have a very important and soul bearing conversation with my boss

[iamcalmdammit]

Sleepless night || [Simon "Ghost" Riley x f!reader]

note: this was supposed to be something completely different but then simon turned into a lovesick puppy somehow. what do you think?

Simon could only hear the sound of an explosion nearby and see the smoke from where he was, but Soap was close, he reported it was the same building you were in. His heart was racing, his thoughts wandering a little too far as he thought about the worst case scenario.

"Echo 3-7, come in," There was no response. "Echo 3-7, do you copy?" He forced himself to sound calm, but in reality he was everything but calm. He was losing his mind, getting into a thought spiral he was afraid he wouldn't be able to escape until you finally said something. "Y/N, please, say something," he tried again, this time sounding desperate.

"Lt., I have a visual on her, she seems to be okay," came Soap's voice through his earpiece.

"Are you sure it's her?"

"Positive. From here it seems like she's trying to use her radio."

Right, it must be it, it just doesn't work properly after you being so close to the explosion. Maybe you didn't even hear him calling out for you. "Must be the result of the blast," he noted eventually.

"Probably. I'm on my way there." Some time passed in silence which made him think Soap didn't feel like chatting this time around. But he was wrong as the sergeant broke the silence not a whole five minutes later. "So her real name is Y/N?"

After letting out a long sigh, Simon closed his eyes. "Yes," he replied, knowing well enough what was about to come.

"Why did she tell you?"

"She had her reasons."

"You two are close, aren't you?"

"Not anymore."

"I bet she has seen you without the mask," Soap said and it was clear through his voice that he was smiling to himself.

"She has."

"You were dating, weren't you?"

Okay, this was getting out of hand. "Don't push your luck, sergeant," Simon warned him.

"Okay, fine, I'll stop, sir."

"Thank you. What's your status?"

"Almost there. No sight of the attackers."

Good. At least you weren't in danger now. He could only hope you had no injuries of any kind, like a nasty internal bleeding you didn't notice due to the spike in your adrenaline level. He couldn't lose you, not now and not like this.

There were so many things he wanted to say after what had happened between you. He fucked up big time and it was by now crystal clear to him that you had to talk about your relationship. You had to fix it. He had to fix it.

"She's fine, Lt., only has a couple of bruises and cuts," Soap's voice came through the earpiece again. "Her radio is dead, we'll stay together from now on."

"Copy. I'll get the car and pick you up. Stay where you are."

"Understood."

The car ride back to the team's temporary base passed in complete silence. You didn't say a word, mostly focused on the city around you instead, while Soap was clearly torn between asking a bunch of questions from the two of you and keeping silent as it was none of his business. In the end he kept his eyes on your environment, making sure no one was following you.

You didn't talk to him. Aside from a short thanks back when you had gotten into the car in front of the building, you said absolutely nothing. He didn't mind as having a conversation in front of the others now would have been torture. It was hard to control his emotions and since you didn't want the rest of the team to find out about your history, it was best to keep quiet for now.

Late at night, around two or three in the morning, Simon woke up. He was staring at the ceiling for a while, thinking about you. Again. But this time he had enough. He couldn't wait any longer. So he quietly stood up and walked over to where you were sleeping.

"Hey, Y/N, wake up," he said, gently putting a hand on your shoulder.

"Why?" you asked groggily.

"Let's talk."

"Now? What time is it anyway?"

"Late, but it can't wait."

"All right."

The pair of you walked to a room far from the others and he quickly put his hands on your shoulders as he looked you in the eye. "You sure you're okay?" he asked worriedly.

"Yeah, I'm good."

"I'm glad to hear that." Biting on his lower lip under the mask, he thought about how to proceed. It was a dangerous conversation that could go wrong any second. "After seeing the place explode I thought I'd lost you," Simon admitted after some thinking.

You let out a short laugh upon hearing this. "It's not that easy to get rid of me."

"That I know."

Silence fell between you and he could see you were struggling to figure out what to say. "Is this why you woke me up?" you asked in the end.

"No, I actually wanted to tell you something," he quickly replied before gulping. "I fucked up, I know that now."

"Took you long enough."

You were right, he couldn't argue with this statement. "Every time I saw you with Alex, knowing how much he knows about you--the real you," he began uncertainly but didn't finish the sentence just yet. After inhaling and exhaling, he eventually said, "It was too much and I definitely misread the situation."

"And?" you asked expectantly.

"You're just friends, more like siblings. I get it, I have no reason to be jealous."

"Thank you. What changed your mind?"

"Time," he said. "I thought a lot about what went wrong after we broke up. Also… Yeah, it probably helped that Alex came to talk to me about it. He told me how badly I hurt your feelings."

Letting out a groan, you put a hand on the back of your neck. "I'll have to talk to him about boundaries," you said quietly.

"He was just worried about you."

A few months ago he wouldn't have thought of protecting Alex, but here he was, trying to do it. He was important to you and Simon didn't want to stand between the two of you. He had to get over his stupid jealousy.

"You know, I was wondering if we could start again," he spoke up again. "I miss you. I never thought I would ever say something like this, but I can't sleep without you next to me. I can't eat, I can't breathe, I can't focus. I can't live like that."

"I know the feeling," you noted quietly. "You left me, Simon. You said things that really hurt me. I spent days blaming myself, that maybe you're right, that maybe I let him too close."

Shaking his head, he quickly stepped closer to put a hand on the side of your neck, caressing your jawline with his gloved thumb. "You need a friend you can talk to about the things you do on the field, I didn't get that back then, but I get it now," he explained with a smile you couldn't see now.

Smiling yourself, you reached out and took off his mask. "You're lucky you're cute," you told him.

"You think I'm cute?" You nodded. "Marry me," he blurted out.

"What?"

Yeah, what? But as he thought about it, it wasn't a joke or anything. "I'm serious," he told you. "Let's get married."

Shaking your head, you stood on your toes to kiss him gently. "We barely agreed to give our relationship another shot, I think it's too soon," you said with your hands on his chest.

"Come on, in our line of work we shouldn't wait with things like this. Let's celebrate that we found someone who can understand why we do what we do, someone who wouldn't judge the other for the things they do on the field," he tried.

"How long have you been thinking about this?" you asked with your head tilted to the side.

"For a couple of hours, I guess." You laughed and put his mask back on. "Hey, I know it's not that long, but I'm serious. Think about it. Please." Before you could say anything, you both turned to the door when you heard footsteps. "Not a word!" Simon warned him.

Soap opened his mouth, but in the end decided to put up his hands and go back to the others without saying anything.

[scribblesofagoonerr]

Cos' sometimes sleep isn't enough anymore | Inner Demons

⟫ Alphabet Challenge, C - Cos' sometimes sleep isn't enough anymore

Pairings: leah williamson x teen reader, arsenal wfc x teen reader

I guess I'm on a roll tonight? 3 parts posted so far, I'm not even sure how many parts this will end up with but, um, yeah, i hope you like this one and it's not to heavy to read.

Absolutely none of it's proof-read so yet again it could seem jumbled up or not even make sense but umm I can't sleep and my brain is overthinking at 4 am so this is the result of it :)

Thanks for all the continuous love and support on this so far!

Waking up in hospital, you think over your thoughts about what happened and wonder if you really did mean to do it?

tw: heavy angst, talks of SH, MH, suicide and death.

Bright lights and slow repetive beeps followed by the sterile smell of a hospital enrivoment.

That's how you knew it was bad when you woke up.

You really hadn't mean for it to get to that point though, you made the mistake of cutting deeper than you should have and now you have landed yourself in the hospital.

This was definitely not your smartest move you had pulled.

Something tells you it wouldn't be so easy to hide your pain behind a fake smile now.

You felt the wet tears covering your own hand along with the heavy weight of another body practically leaning on you.

"Geez, did somebody die in here or something?" Was the first words you spoke since you had fallen unconcious and of course, it was with your usual cocky teenage atttiude.

Dark humour has always been your go to, you hate to show any type of vulnerability.

"Y/N/N" Leah voice croaks in surprise as she sits bolt up right to look straight at you. "You're awake, finally!" she immediately breaks down into sobs again as she reaches towards you and wraps her arms around you.

"Yeah, I'm awake but there's no need to cry about it" You struck back with the same cocky atittude, that drove your team mates crazy but loved you never the less. "Seriously though, did someone die? Cos' you're crying that much right now that I'm begining to think so" you note, hiding your own pain behind the smile.

Just keep smiling, nobody will ask questions.

Everyone will think you're fine.

"Seriously, Y/N?" Leah is quick to smack you around the back of the head as she's now giving you one of her famous glares, one that you knew all too well. "You scared me to death, you little shit!" she admits, showing her vunerability.

"Ow. Ow-- Hey, you can't hit me, I'm fragile right now" You can't help but pout and hope for sympathy from the older blonde girl.

"Fragile, huh? You seem fine enough to be making jokes" Leah remarks as she continues to glare at you.

"Come on, you know that dark humour is the way to go sometimes Le" You grin at the blonde, who doesn't seem to have the same idea.

See? Totally easy to hide your pain.

Leah just stares at you in disbelief you're really cracking jokes right now, "You're unbelieve sometimes, Y/F/N" she mutters aloud.

"Uh oh, your using my full name, am I in trouble now?" You can't help to continue with your cocky, I don't give a shit attitude never the less you had worried all of your team mates like you did.

"Right now I'm just glad that you're alive," Leah admits as she rewraps her arms around you and squeezes you gently. "But if you ever scare me like that again then we'll be having a very different conversation!" she tells you, sternly.

"Okay" You wince slightly as the tightness of the hug that the blonde was very reluctant to let go off you. "Seriously, Le. I'm fine now, why are you still crying so much?" You ask, confused.

"I'm crying because I... I thought I had really lost you this time" Leah speaks her thoughts aloud as she still holds onto you like you would disappear all over again. "When I found you, like the... like the way I did, I thought you was going to die" she adds in, quietly.

Your own amused smile starts to falter as you glance down at the bandages wrapped around your arm. "I'm sorry... I am really sorry for scaring you like that" You apologise quietly, starting to realise the seriousness of it all.

You must've had all of your team mates so worried and right now you were only acting like a total jackass about it.

"I was so scared" Leah replies as she pulls away from hugging you before she readjusts to move onto the bed beside you. "There was so much blood, Y/N/N. I... I thought when we arrived at the hospital, it would be too late and I'd be saying goodbye to you instead" she explains, swallowing the lump that formed in her throat.

Shit, why did I go and do that? I've made Leah almost have a nervous break down.

How could you be so selfish? You didn't deserve the love you recieved from your team mate.

"I bet the bathrooms' a right bloody mess now then" You can't help the comment that slips out of your mouth.

Once again, dark humour is a key to hiding the reality of pain.

Leah clicks her tongue at your comment, although she can tell exactly what you're doing now.

You had been doing it all this long so easily, it was just that nobody realised it.

"Why didn't you tell me that it was getting bad again?" The blondes' question is something that catches you off guard.

Guilt-striken to hear her words, you found sudden interest with the crisp white sheets currently covering you.

There was a lot of things that you could have said, but would she want to hear any of it?

Nobody can help me with the way I feel,

I'm so tired,

I wanted to relieve the pain, I wanted a way out.

All of the questions racing through your mind, you actually began to wonder if you had cut yourself that deep on purpose? Did your own selfishness overshadow any other feelings inside of you.

The battle with your inner demons was just too much sometimes, you was just so exhausted now.

So, why couldn't you have just been left to die instead?

"What's going on inside your head, Y/N/N?" Leah's next question brought you out of your dark thoughts. "Talk to me, you know that I'm here to listen" she states with a gentle tone of voice.

Although the next words that you speak are nothing that she can be prepared to hear.

"I think... I think I wanted to die, I wanted an out on life" Your voice quivers as you admit the truth to the blonde, finally.

"W... What?" Leah looks at you with a mixture of shock and hurt.

"I'm so tired, Le-- I'm just so fuckin' tired. I... I can't do this anymore" You express your feelings as you feel yourself tearing up.

It was as if Leah hadn't quite regestered the words you had said, or she had but she refused to believe that you actually did want to try and kill yourself.

"The girls all went to get coffee, um I think that all of the girls will be back soon though" The blonde tells you quietly as she wraps her free arm around you and gives you a small smile.

Denial, it was so easy to pretend there wasn't anything to read into with your most recent confession.

"Leah--"

"I bet they'll be happy to know that you're awake now" Leah cut you off as she continues to give you that weary smile, you weren't sure if she was now clutching onto you a bit tighter in fear of you pulling another stunt like you did.

"Leah, didn't you hear me? I said I wanted to die!" You shout loud enough for her to suck in a sharp breath.

"I heard you, Y/N/N-- I heard you, I saw you, I... I was there for it all. I was the one who found you in the bathroom; You was lay in a pool of your own blood while you were slipping in and out of unconciousness" Leah broke her game of where she didn't pretend you as she turned to face you, you had her whole attention now. "I sat there, pressing a god-damn towel against your cuts, praying that you would make it and you... you tell me that you want to die? You don't get to die. You can't, we need you-- Damn it Y/N, I need you! Y... You're my family! So you don't get to tell me you want to die!" she tells you, the shake in her voice so evident that she's close to tears again.

"What? You... You want to die?" Beth broke the tense silence as she has a distraught look on her face.

"Do you really mean that?" Lia questions as her eyes widen in shock.

Neither you or Leah realise that some of the older girls had made their way back to your room, when they arrived they were delighted with the realisation that you were now finally awake after the long 24 hours but that quickly turned into shock and hurt when they heard Leah's words so boldly, that even the patients down the hall probably would've heard.

"I do, I did... I don't know. I'm tired, I can't... I can't keep doing this anymore" You admit out loud for every single one of them to hear.

You hear the blonde beside you suck in another sharp breath as she keeps her arm firmly attached round your shoulder.

The confession is left hanging in the air, leaving a tense feeling and it was suddenly so quiet that in the room that you were certain that you would even be able to hear a pin drop.

Nobody utters a word, a state of shock written across each one of their faces.

"Sometimes sleep isn't enough when it's my soul that's tired" You tell them, leaving them all stood there grief-stricken with the realisation that you really had been struggling for longer than you wanted to admit.

[lilacsareinbloomagain]

Heyo! May I request platonic yandere chain with reader? But instead of isekai like normal the reader is actually a destructive spirit or deity that was reawakened by either Dark Link or Ganon? Anywhoooo I hope you’re having a great week- mine was filled with exams lmfaooooo

Thanks for requesting anon! I really hope you had good results from those exams!

Notes: My week was okay, thank you for asking!!

I really let out my imagination out on this one, hope you'll like it.

BTW, take this as a part on the back for getting through your week.

I feel like I made the yandereness on this one so light, I'm sorry

-> Reader can't bring themselves to remember anyone's names so just remembers their most striking characteristics in their opinion.

-> It's been a while since I've read the comic, so Time keeping FD's mask on his belt for safety measures (since it's the most dangerous one and he can't lose it) is merely a headcanon of mine.

-> Reader is a menace who has questionable intellect (AKA a chaotic, pyromaniac, destructive entity being forced to be nice to others by the good guys™).

-> I left the end ambiguous, so you guys can decide if reader was either truly tamed or is still a menace who Time has to keep on check so they won't be too cruel on their "pranks".

-> Reader also magically rearranged Time's ocarina so each hole would play different a different sound at some point, so he literally had to re-learn where each note was so that he could go back to playing his songs again.

-> Reader slept for more than Time and Wild both and doesn't know a thing about the Zelda lore other than the Golden goddesses.

TWs: Light platonic yanderism, mention of burns, mentions of fire and arson, mentions of loud noises, basically just reader being an absolute hazard to anyone and everyone.

Platonic yandere! Chain x Reader

Debt to pay.

People from your time used to say that one could sooner move a mountain from it's resting place rather than tame your natural ways.

You wouldn't say you were a deity, per say, you thrived on chaos and setbacks, a living annoyance to the poor living things that breathed the same air as you, and roamed the earth by the same time you did.

It was in your nature to be destructive, yes, but you never wanted destruction, at least not full extinction. The darkness and the light were both two sides of the same rupee, they were one just like the other, beings of both sides would react the exact identical way to having their butts lit on fire. So, of course, you weren't one to pick and choose who you'd go after each day.

Thing is, most people didn't understand that —if anyone at all— so everyone just assumed you were a being of pure darkness, even if you actually saw yourself as more of a dark gray entity from a moral chart perspective.

And that was how you got yourself “killed”, if that's even the right thing to call it.

Somehow, no one seemed to care much when you lit whole villages on fire and made all of the walls of full-on castles start dissing out pure electricity, but they almost dislocated their jaws the moment you decided to do a silly trick and turn all of their lovely goddesses statues upside down for a day.

As if those same goddesses hadn't just ignored all of their prayers in the last hundreds of years you spent freely making their lives miserable.

You were stored in a vase. Not even a cool cool one. A plain clay vase deep within a temple under the ground. If you could choose, you'd have preferred something more majestic and up to the level of your power, but then again, it wasn't like you were in place to say anything in your defense.

Sometimes you just wondered how your small group of worshipers were. They probably weren't the best people out there, if you could say so yourself, but you were still curious if they ended up having similar fates to yours.

A long, long time later, you were "revived", for the same reason you were "killed".

Not the best choice on the part of whoever went through the trouble of doing all that, but who were you to judge? Or even to complain?

From what you could get from the boring evil monologue the guy in front of you was giving after having just woken you up from the longest nap you've ever had —since you couldn't really die— the guy wanted you to aid him in his quest to kill some other guys and take over the world or some boring nefarious plan like that.

You couldn't recall any of the names he just said, though, so you could only guess that you had either slept for a pretty damn long time, or you were in an entirely different world on itself.

Before you could fully decide on one of the two possibilities, the red guy sent you to fight against that group of guys he was talking about, seven men with varying shades of blonde hair along with two guys who weren't blond at all.

Perhaps you could have admired the strength of the red guy's magic, to just bring you out of your sleep like that and already straight up teleport you.

Thing is, you didn't really care enough to do that, you just did whatever you wanted the moment you realized you were fully conscious and in a physical body once again.

Were you chaotic and very much possibly evil? Yes. Were you stupid, however? Kinda No.

So the moment the opportunity presented itself, you followed those guys around, gathering information. Taking notice also of that one shadow looking dude, who was following them around just like you, seemingly with the intention of making their lives hell.

Maybe he'd be an interesting being to interact with, if he wasn't as prickly as a damn cactus. You swore you couldn't even approach the guy without him reacting like a startled cat, pointing his flimsy sword straight to your face. You swore to yourself you'd break that thing in half one of these days.

And so you set your sights fully on the blond —and the not so blond— guys, taking your time to also play around with the villages they went to and toy with the monster camps they passed by.

Of course, you couldn't just ignore the massively ominous aura drifting from the masks that one of the taller blondies carried around. Your hands itched to get a grasp on those things, whatever was sealed inside it was magical and possibly powerful, and the possibilities sent your mind on quite a dangerous frenzy.

The thing that made you a bit disappointed, however, was how long it took for them to notice your presence.

At some point you decided to start giving them some more obvious hints that what was following them wasn't friendly.

They seemed to really like bomb bags, which wasn't exactly safe for them when you could randomly activate those at will.

Also, you couldn't control the rain or storms, of course, but you definitely could attract lightning, especially since they all seemed to enjoy carrying around those identical metal swords.

Sometimes you just liked to pull on their hair and make knots on them, given that some had really long hair.

The wolf guy had a horse, one you could just startle really easily. Although you didn't have the result you wanted, since the wolf guy wasn't sent flying the moment his horse went crazy.

You caught him later, though. Making loud, high pitched noises to absolutely blow away his senses the moment he turned into a wolf to try and chase you down.

The fire that the short guy was using to mend a weapon randomly became overly strong, enough to have burned his whole arm, if he hadn't pulled away quick enough.

The scarf of the other one just one day became a bit too hard around his neck. It's a good thing for him that he was quick enough to pull it off his neck before he suffocated.

You watched as the one with pink hair almost had a breakdown, as all his colorful, shiny little trinkets and accessories having become dulled, turning completely pitch black, no traces of their original colors or magic left.

The kid tried to control the wind, only to have it blown straight back to his face, bringing leaves and sand with it.

You made sure their cook accidentally poured a bit too much pepper in their food, or salt, even sugar, if you felt like it.

The brown haired one suddenly lost control of his magic, what was supposed to heal their wounds ended up dyeing their hair blue for days on end.

That other guy who always overslept felt his pillow being pulled from under his head at random times through his nights.

And the tall guy's masks have all suddenly decided to disappear.

“Okay. Something is going on here. And it's not something natural.” Time sighed, looking around the camp, tired and worried, concerned.

Wild’s hair was an absolute mess and seemed to have caught on fire at some point, Warriors was glaring at his scarf, keeping it as far from his —almost purple— neck as possible. Wind had his hair almost as messy as Wild's, full of leaves and dirt, he was pretty sure there were also some bugs around it, his cheek had a thin cut from a sharp little rock.

Twilight was occupied comforting Epona, although the both of them seemed quite shaken up by something.

Four had some burns around the tips of his fingers, his hair usual blond hair now stained with blue, Hyrule sitting beside him with a frown, bandaging his hands rather than using his healing magic like he normally would.

Sky wasn't far from the two, almost dozing off despite the migraine that had settled behinds his eyes, which were now dotted with heavy bags from sleepless nights. Legend's terrible mood did not seem to disturb his need for a nap.

“Oh, really?” Legend almost growled back, positively fuming with barely contained rage gleaming in his eyes.

“Vet, I am not your enemy here, but once we find out who is doing this, you can direct your anger towards whoever they are.” Time shot a look to the other.

“That is, if it's even a person doing this. It might be some kind of monster.” Warriors commented.

“One thing we're sure of is that there's magic involved in this.” Hyrule spoke up, finished with the bandaging.

“I don't even know why you're so mad, Leg, you were possibly the least affected by this.” Four complained, eyebrows furrowed with stress. Even as a blacksmith, he was never a fan of getting burned, especially not being caught off guard like that!

“Agreed.” Wild was the next to speak, not bothering to brush the soot out of his hair. It wasn't quite the first time he almost been exploded, after all, even though the experience didn't get any better no matter how many times he went through it.

“You're really saying that, even though the kid only got a burst of wind to the face.”

“Ay! Mind your own business, Legend!” Wind sprung up in defense of himself, already looking to be tense prior to the attack, as the two began arguing.

While the group was in quite the mess, you took your chances to go ahead and approach stealthily to attempt to take the mask you were so curious about. Said mask being the last one you hadn't stolen borrowed yet, since the tall guy seemed to have noticed his other masks disappearances and decided to take extra means of protection towards that one.

In your opinion, your risks were all carefully thought out and calculated, however, you seemed to have completely forgotten about a certain wolf guy at the edge of the camp, standing beside his horse and looking straight at you.

You managed to grab the mask from the taller guy's belt! But at what price..?

Before you could even manage to turn around and run away with it, a hand shot out, hooking on the back of the collar of your shirt, pushing you to the ground in a second. And in another second, there was a blade shoved right in front of your face.

Goddammit.

You barely paid any attention to all the yelling, too occupied hugging your newly acquired possession tightly to your chest.

“Hand me that mask. Now.” A voice right behind you demanded, yet you still didn't move.

“No.”

The sword in front of you seemed to inch just slightly closer to your neck.

“At least tell me what it is, first!” You asked, a bit more squirmy, not at all comfortable with the vulnerability you had right now, since it seemed like that long sleep left you with a bit less power than you used to have, clearly a precaution, should you ever gain you body back. It was smart from your captors, but very much annoying for you.

“None of your business, now give me back my mask!” The tall guy —now in front of you— stressed. You could tell that his restlessness was hinting towards just how near he was to the end of his wits.

“If this piece of porcelain is as powerful as it seems, then yes, yes it is my business!”

It wasn't, not really, but you were too curious to just give up on information just like that.

The tall guy went quiet for a second before he finally replied, going with a question instead of actually giving you an answer like you were expecting from him.

“How do you know how powerful it is?”

“None of your business.” You threw his own words back at him and now the dull side of the sword was suddenly pressing up pretty uncomfortably against your skin, burning you. “Okay, fine, I'll tell you.”

And that was how you met the Links, and also how you became chained to them, unable to leave. After all, you did have to pay them back for all that you did to every single one of them.

But, for some reason, that simple dept seemed to only to get bigger the longer you spent time with them, despite the fact you weren't doing anything entirely wrong…

At least, that was the excuse they gave to you, yet something in you made you feel like that wasn't the full truth.

Extra (This happened)

Time: give me back my shit

Reader: nuh-uh

Time: fym nuh-uh

[frownyalfred]

Hey Res! Please ignore this ask if it's too troublesome or bothersome

I saw you had an guide for non-drikers writers that wanted to write about a character who drink. I was wondering if you could the same about guns?

I read synchronicity and I loved it how you used Jason's knowledge with guns to control the narrative and pacing. I don't know if you have actual technical knowledge on handguns (I think it's a no? But maybe you do?) But any tip is nice

Thank you a lot 🩷

Hi anon! This is such a fascinating question and I hope I can provide a somewhat plausible answer. I am familiar with some guns and have shot a few in my lifetime, but I am far from an expert.

Some things I think writers need to keep in mind while writing their firearm-related scenes. For clarity, I'm just going to call them guns below.

Are you thinking of a specific gun? Make sure you know its full name but ALSO make sure you know its nickname. Your character might think of it as "the Berretta" instead of its full name, etc.

What does your gun fire? Does it take shells, bullets, cartridges, etc? Shotguns, for example, don't fire bullets. That's a common mistake I see.

How do you reload said gun? Is it easy? What parts of the gun do you have to touch? Reloading a shotgun is MUCH different from reloading a handgun, for example.

Most guns get hot and release gunpowder residue when shot. They're LOUD. You can have several cascading things happen to a character who fires a gun or is near a gun when it fires: ringing ears, the smell of gunpowder, the hot feeling of the gun's muzzle, etc.

Even the best sharpshooters miss shots. IRL shooting is HARD, especially when moving. Different guns have different benefits to shooting style, stance, targets. Firing a handgun willy-nilly will rarely result in accurate shots, even if you dual wield (which is silly, this is SO hard).

Stance MATTERS. If you've ever seen Hannibal, there's a scene where Will talks about his choice of shooting stance with Beverly. They bicker over Isosceles and Weaver, which are two standard stances. One uses a triangle between your arms and the gun to brace for the kickback of the shot, while the other moves that brace to one side with a different grip. Will eventually chooses the latter stance because of a past shoulder injury. (GIF of Will struggling with his original isosceles stance)

If a gun isn't properly braced when fired, it will kick back and hit you. Sometimes in the face. Yes this has happened with me and a rifle. My first day shooting cans, I had a huge bruise on my face AND on my chest where the rifle butt kicked back.

If your gun uses bullets, there are different calibers. If you've ever watched Mythbusters, you can see why caliber matters -- it depends what or who you're shooting. Are you trying to penetrate armor? Are you sacrificing accuracy for power? Different guns use different calibers for numerous reasons, and guns can be altered to use other ammo as well.

With respect to discussing caliber while writing: It's all VERY complicated if you don't know guns, so make sure you're not giving too much detail if you can avoid it. That's a very easy way to spot a lack of experience with guns, in my experience. Your reader doesn't need to know the caliber just because the character is shooting a gun -- but in an autopsy, sure, the caliber is relevant.

You will lose your hearing eventually if you fire guns close to your ears unprotected. It's not sexy, and it also causes something called tinnitus. The real pros wear ear protection.

In terms of realism for writing, here's a couple rapid fire busted myths: You can't dodge bullets unless you're superhuman. Bullet wounds to the legs/arms/shoulders can absolutely still be fatal. Cardiac arrest caused by being shot is usually fatal, and CPR doesn't really help on its own. "Running out of shots" depends on the gun AND the modifications someone has made to it. You can't always tell just by looking at a gun what it will do. Silencers are rarely "silent" and are heavily regulated.

Injuries: Some bullets tear through bodies. Some aren't high enough caliber to do more than go in and lodge in some tissue. Some fragment and bounce around in weird ways. Depending on how gruesome you want to get, there's a lot of different ways to describe gunshot injuries. I've always been the kind of person to google images for better understanding, but I understand that's not for everyone. I think NYT or WaPo did a good piece on traumatic gun injuries a few years back, complete with an interview with an ER doc from Chicago (?). One thing I learned there -- sometimes people lose their legs, or both legs, after being shot in their leg.

In terms of describing how someone uses/fights with guns, I know the John Wick movies are a little cheesy, but they are staged by people who REALLY know their guns. They talk about what he's using usually before the scene starts, and there's very few frills when it comes to stance, firing, etc. John does a cool trick in the first or second movie where he ejects a casing one-handed away from his face, a notoriously hard maneuver that most people usually do with two hands to avoid getting burned. I highly recommend watching the John Wick movies for blocking ideas.

Which reminds me -- holding a gun sideways is a terrible idea. For many reasons. Stance, casing ejection, stability, etc. Someone can use it against you.

Never point a gun at something you're not willing to shoot. Well-trained characters should follow this rule religiously. If they were soldiers, agents, etc, they will know this rule.

Similarly, multiple people with guns will "clear" a room before entering. They will be trained for something called crossfire, which is when someone is downrange of their gun and could potentially be shot. A group of characters bursting into a room without clearing their shot is a nightmare. This is how people shoot their friends or random civilians.

I hope someone more knowledgeable can add onto this! These are just some big things that stick out to me when reading. I highly recommend checking out Mythbusters, John Wick, and even Hannibal for some semi-realistic shooting references. Good luck!

[writingquestionsanswered]

Anonymous asked: I struggle with motivation to write and figuring out what I want to happen in my story. I'm really good at picking out tropes, understanding character motivation, seeing where the story is going, recognising good writing, etc. I often have dreams that are full-fledged, complex stories, so I know the creativity is there. It's just, for some reason, when it's my intent to create, nothing happens. I get stuck thinking 'they'll see this coming' or 'this wouldn't work', and I can't figure out how I want it to go. So, I feel like I'm pretty good at stories... when I'm not trying? And i dont know how to do it without trying. I hope this makes sense lol

Struggling with Motivation and Direction

Being able to recognize good stories and dream up good story ideas is a great place to start, but there's more to writing a good story than ideas, tropes, and character motivation. Stories revolve around conflict (internal, external, or both) and the protagonist's pursuit of a goal that will resolve that conflict. Stories have structure... they go through specific phases (setup, rising action, falling action, denouement) and hit specific plot points (hook, inciting incident, midpoint, climax)... and sometimes more specific phases and plot points (there are all different theories on what those are). And through all of these phases and plot points, your character is growing and/or changing (and or changing the people/world around them) while in pursuit of their goal/resolution to the conflict.

There are some writers who can come up with an idea that instantly includes all of those important phases and plot points, and they can sit down over whatever period of time and almost effortlessly hammer out a first draft. However, that is not the case for most writers or most stories. Most stories require some level of plotting or planning ahead of time to work out what happens in all of those specific phases and plot points, and what the character has to do in order to resolve the conflict, and figure out how the resulting events cause your character to change and/or grow/and/or change the people/world around them. Some writers do the bare minimum amount of pre-planning, but then they push through that work as they write, figuring everything out as they go. It's anything but effortless. It's really hard work.

And the thing is, you will probably figure out that you're a planner--meaning that you generally need to put whatever amount of plotting/planning into a story before you write--or you're a pantser--meaning that you do a minimal amount of planning ahead of time but take the time as you're writing to figure things out. Or you may find it depends on the story you're writing. Either way, don't give up just because a story isn't naturally falling out of your fingertips onto the page. Stories are like lumps of clay that you want to turn into a beautiful sculpture. You're not going to pinch here, pull there, and voila. It takes a lot of time and effort to shape them into the thing you want them to be. And sure... there are sculptors who can sit down and create a gorgeous sculpture out of a lump of clay in mere moments, but for most it's not that easy. Same with writing.

So, don't give up. You're right where you need to be. Spend some more time learning about how stories work. (You can look through the posts on my Plot & Story Structure master list to start with.) Read a lot, and when you read, see if you can pick out the different story phases and plot points. Analyze stories you love to see how you work. Author K.M. Weiland has a story structure database that pulls apart popular stories and breaks them down into all those different pieces. There are also a lot of great videos on YouTube about story structure and plotting.

Ultimately, keep at it. You'll get there!!!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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[genericpuff]

hey, hope you're doing well!

I've been re-reading LORE | REKINDLED from time to time everytime a new chapter comes out, it's just something I've been in the habit of doing incase I pick up anything that might've flown over my head the first time and also because your artstyle is just very nice to look at

Though I was wondering, if the gods can teleport, what is the use of cars for? Hades teleported back home and let Charon take his car back which became the inciting incident for Persephone to end up in the Underworld. Is it for carpooling? Just to show off status and riches? To keep up with modern trends?

I hope I didn't come off too strong with my question, it was just something that popped into my mind while I was rereading. Your rewrite is extremely fascinating and I'm excited to see how it continues!

Ouu I've been waiting for someone to ask this! >:3

Olympus and the Underworld differ in how they operate. Olympus has many gods who are revered and worshipped, and as such their society was largely built on the relationship between gods and mortals through the offerings made by humans and the boons given by gods.

The Underworld, on the other hand, couldn't depend on such gifts as many mortals don't worship them in the same way as Olympians - rather, they're feared and whispered about, with the common belief that to speak the names of the Underworld gods would be to invoke death and chaos.

So, to ensure that the Underworld could still develop, Hades had to build the Underworld through the exchange of goods and services (i.e. capitalism).

Shades have no need for economy. They're dead. So while some do wind up working for Hades in indebted servitude (specifically the beings who attempted to bargain with the God of the Dead), the majority of them are simply cast into Asphodel, Elysium, or Tartarus, depending on the judgment given by Hades, and live out the rest of their afterlives wherever they end up.

Through all this, Olympus and the Underworld have worked together closely to advance their respective realms at an even pace. Hephaestus has operated as a freelancer working as a middleman between the two, lending his skills to the technological advancement of the realms.

Satyrs and nymphs make up a large part of the populations in both the Underworld and Olympus (though for nymphs, there are certain restrictions as to where they can travel depending on their original form - not all nymphs can survive in the Underworld) so much of their respective societies were built around the inclusion of nymphs and satyrs as a result. Gods can teleport, satyrs and nymphs can't. As such, much of the technology present in both realms is for the benefit of satyrs and nymphs, including cars. It's why we see Hades driving a car in the first episode (as he was planning on picking up Minthe) and again when showing Persephone the rainbow bridge connecting the realms, but not when he's simply travelling around on his own. Satyrs and nymphs aren't so much "lower class" as they are just beings who don't have the luxuries of teleportation and flight like gods do - they still contribute and are acknowledged as residents of their realms by the gods who reign over them, so the gods have done their part to ensure that the nymphs and satyrs can exist within a functional society that benefits both them and the gods. Just like with the mortals, it's on the gods' shoulders to ensure their subjects can thrive.

Apollo is one of the few gods who uses cars as a status symbol as he has a very distinctly golden vehicle that makes it easy to identify him. He's very much trying to be seen (•̀ᴗ•́)و

[doppel-dean-er]

STRAP IN JEFFANNIE LOVERS, IT'S ABOUT TO GET YUCKY AND YOU'RE IN THE SPLASHZONE

thought I'd give a comprehensive list on why I personally dislike JeffAnnie because I got called idiotic for it and I see that as a top tier compliment. I go more in depth at the end, but if you just want the quick stuff (since I know y'all like the quotes!!) here you go, but please read the rest of it!! this is an open discussion.

also I get pretty gross in my descriptions of Annie, be warned

season 2 episode 1: "since you have clearly failed to grasp the central insipid metaphor of those twilight books you devour, let me explain it to you. men are monsters who crave young flesh, the end."

season 3 episode 1: "we can't keep doing this forever, kiddo." "Can't we?" "no, that's gross. I feel gross."

season 4 episode 3: "I was just daydreaming. I mean, I've married you at least a half a dozen times. and Troy. and Zac Efron. Mostly Zac Efron."

season 3 episode 16: "but, we love Jeff." "no, we don't. we're just in love with the idea of being loved. and if we can teach a guy like Jeff to do it, we'll never be unloved. so we keep running the same scenario over and over hoping for a different result."

season 6 episode 13: "are you okay?" "is this really what you want?" "of course. I mean, I'd be fine with a dog too, but whatever you want." "do you have any idea what I want?" "yes?"

season 2 episode 20: "the general atmosphere of 'would they?' 'might they?'" "Annie, I think you're reading into some things." "oh really?" "oh, give me a break. I mean, you could do the same thing with Pierce and Abed!" "yeah, let's be honest, there's more between you and Annie than between me and Pierce." "Abed, it's called chemistry, I have it with everybody."

season 5 episode 11: "I'm 40."

I'd like to actually argue with a personal opinion based on a fact, and some anecdotal hypotheticals

first of all, I'm 17, a year younger than Annie in season one. I know people who are 19, 20 even. the concept of them or myself dating someone who is (not only fully developed in the brain, but) at least ten years older than ourselves-

-is gross, no? if Annie got held back at all, if she didn't drop out, if she and Jeff met in a different way, same age difference and her still in high school, one might say that is a little uncouth, one might even go so far as to say it's gross.

but, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt; make them closer in age, say Jeff is in his 20s instead of his thirties, say 25 (the lowest we can go for him to still be a lawyer). still, Annie's brain wont fully develop until she is 25, meaning Jeff will already be in his thirties by that point, if he dates her any sooner he will be dating what is medically considered an adolescent (10-24) while himself above 30. "but chrissy, chimbo, my love, you're legally an adult at age 18!" if we start bringing the law into this, the post will double in size, to make it simple, just think for a moment why that makes you legally an adult. why is a legal adult not allowed to drink? why would the United States want people who are not fully developed making decisions, and how does that affect their country? food for thought.

another benefit of the doubt! take age out of the question, just look at them as people and their experiences, not by a number! age ain't nothing number, right? like Aaliyah, right? Yeah, did you know R Kelly, the convicted sex offender, wrote that song? Crazy, right? sorry, off topic. Silly me, silly little baby brain. haha. let's look at their dynamic:

Jeff is a man who values the women he dates - rather, sleeps with - very little. "I'm Jeff Winger, and I would rather look at myself naked than the women I sleep with!" he states, so confident and proud of himself. "I asked this woman out 30 seconds ago to prove a point!" he shouts. "I'll be back with booty!" he sneers. does this seem like the kind of person that would think of women in the long-term? that is Jeff.

Annie on the other hand, as the boy-crazy girlish urchin she is, sees every man that comes her way as Christ incarnate. Annie is obsessive, she enrolled in nearly all of Troy's classes to get some sense that someone, anyone, no matter how bad they treat her, has to rely on her for something she knows. Annie is fresh and inexperienced, she can't say the word 'penis' because it makes her uncomfortable and squirmy. pure, untouched porcelain. so impressionable, don't you think? so untainted, virginal. looking for a father.

describing her like that makes you a bit uncomfortable, doesn't it? feels a little yucky in your tum tum?

that's because if you take away their ages, their experiences speak for themselves. Annie is young, obsessive. Jeff has more experience than her and will discard her quickly in favor of someone younger or better looking. if you're into the 'born sexy yesterday' trope, go ahead. I'm not one to stop you from doing what makes you feel good! We all know what you really want, you don't have to hide it, Humbert- sorry, Jeff. slip of the tongue. scream it loud! scream it on the rooftops, or on the streets: "I want to fuck a teenager!!" see how people look at you!

Oh, they're not smiling, are they? yikes.

i'd just like to leave you with a personal opinion.

is the pairing of Jeff and Annie iffy and pretty gross? yes, scroll up, read this post again if you aren't convinced. at the same time, should it be removed from the show entirely because it's problematic and horrible and everyone who supports JeffAnnie is a meth-addicted pedophile who eats babies and fucks sticky flashlights with the mouthless faces of their classmates taped to the rim? while I would prefer that JeffAnnie didn't happen, yes, I just think those of you who are into this are just uneducated and stubborn. some of you, one of you in particular, i'm sure is a sweaty neckbeard with a fedora and a 4chan tripcode. but not all of you, and for that I have hope.

JeffAnnie is legal, yes. JeffAnnie is by far not the worst, too. and we, as mature half-adults, can admit that. I for one believe that you should be able to ship anything that is both legal and non-blood-related. that's the magic of fandom! enemies to lovers is one of the most popular genres! the toxicity of the relationship is not the problem, it is the predatory nature and unsavory implications that are the problem. I think the relationship as a whole is not something to be looked at with positive emotions, but I also don't believe that this type of screen representation is bad. just because something is put to screen does not mean it is acceptable. I think that's something we all learned in second grade, yes? good. glad we're all on the same page. you're looking wonderful. I hope you have a great day.

also, just to cover all my bases, it's just a matter of preference. it makes a lot of us uncomfortable to see relationships like that, especially those of us who are around Annie's age. like, imagine being her: you're fresh out of rehab and ready to start your life. this guy who is more than ten years older than you, who you think is kind of cute maybe, starts to look at you the same way. imagine having the knowledge that every time he looks at a woman he just sees a pair of tits and a vag on legs. imagine what he sees when he looks at you. imagine that guy having a conversation with your dad, they might even be closer in age than you and him. that's uncomfortable, to me at least.

plus, Britta and Jeff are a better couple.

and if anyone responds with that whole "Dan Harmon DVD season 6" copy paste I hope you all know it makes me kick my feet and giggle. papa needs an ego boost, go ahead *bats eyes* *gets hit by a car*

[roxannepolice]

This may be stretching the concept of work's intent and possibly conflating it with reader's intent, but I think if you scratch to the absolute bottom of chameleon arch in s3 the ultimate difference between the Doctor and the Master becomes being people oriented vs. goal oriented. Like, if you go beyond the question of "could the Doctor have been something of a bad person* and the Master a good person", and ask "under what circumstances would they be like this", it looks like the Doctor - or, what aside from a body (with all its mind-indepented memories) was left of them in John Smith - was. well. being oriented towards people around him. And. that's what had One go from crotchety man willing to kill over his secrets or even a freaking lighter into the Doctor that is. Meeting all those wonderful companions, starting from Ian and Barbara that would just tell him fuck off you're crossing a line and I will not have it. And no, I don't think it's a matter of "wanting to be liked", but rather seeing "oh my Omega, I actually hurt this person". And in the main story that worked out for good, and in fact I would say that when it comes to "origins of morality" and "how to live" questions, that is the more reliable way to go! But when that same mindset is surrounded by all the bigotry - as well as just living a nice life as it is provided to you! - of edwardian era, it results in... well, obviously, the way to deal with those evil guys is to FITE! and this is what all those teenage boys have been trained to do, should the need call (ah, the hanging cloud of knowledge a need will in fact call them so soon in this two-parter...)! And this... competent. but ultimately underdeveloped through no fault of her own maid needs to just have the distinction between fiction and reality explained to her, the poor thing probably thinks the invention of writing is only to be used for things that are absolutely true... Yeah, punch him.

I use the term "goal-oriented" for the Master, but I suppose I should clarify, because we all know that if it was pure goal-orientation, then there are infinitely easier ways to take over the world that *checks notes* man-eating sofas. Yes, the Master is absolutely into over-convoluted plans to the point where they become a goal in itself. But what I mean is, no, they can't just hang around seeing the universe, they need a goal to achieve, there has to be a point to all this, and survival and power are arguably the two most basic goals there can be, once you scratch happiness as a bit too indefinite. And obviously, that's the exact opposite of "how to live". In many ways its a much more animalistic and base motivation than anything a conscious mind might want. Kind of existence vs. life distinction. BUT? In those last few decades of universe's existence??? Where there is literally no other goal left than survival? Not necessarily your own survival, but rather survival as an abstract concept, survival of ANYTHING? That mindset, combined with brains, makes you the most wonderful person that could possibly be! You're there, doggedly pursuing the only goal left in the universe, putting all of the resources you have left, MAKING ADVANCED TECHNOLOGY OUT OF FREAKING FOOD, and if anyone has any shot at surviving it is indeed thanks to you! There are two apparent contradiction to this (as of course there have to be in a story that's honest and not just making a point). The first is Yana keeping up the hopes of other people even while knowing it's likely false, and the second is him being willing to sacrifice himself so others will reach Utopia. But if you think about it. Both of these things are, in a way, utilitarian. Yes, hope is often framed as the ultimate irrational ideal, but once it's gone from everyone else, then... what is there to do? That's the end to the only goal left. So long as others hope you can get them out, you can go on tinkering just in bloody case. And while giving up your life for others tends to be framed as the ultimate act of good... there's a level at which Yana just freaking calucates himself as the easiest to expend. He's old and tired. The people who managed to reach the silo are either children or young and strong, there's a lot ahead of them. This is cynical and absolutely not the perspective to hold. But. at the end of the universe. This cynicism leads to sacrifice.

THAT IS NOT SAY YANA ISN'T JUST PLAIN NICE AND SHOWING MORE CONSIDERATION FOR OTHER'S FEELINGS THAN THE MASTER IN ANY FORMAT EVER DID! But I suppose when you're goal-oriented and everyone around you literally has no other goals than yours... why not just be kind** indeed?

Yes, there's a great tensimm fanfic about this:

*I admit I think one of the most interesting aspects of John Smith was precisely making him not a good person but hardly the worst man there ever was maybe it's because I've read edwardian era books that makes me think his paternalisation of Martha really wasn't the worst way for a white man to treat a poc even without outright violence. But if he was a really good person then that would just tell you making him give up his existence was bad because he's a good person whereas as it is the question is what makes the subjectively real existence of this particular not very good but not really worse than millions of people like him man that devloped subjectively very real bonds with others more expendable than any other's?

** Gosh my mixed feeling for Twelve, like I love him, he's up there with 2,3,4 and 10 as character-defining for me, but why just why have him always turn out to be ultimately right about his absolute morals, he's kind of the antithesis to time lord victorious, so long as you do the kind thing then there's always an unforeseen ex machina to prove you right, you'll never fuck up REAL bad, a real dilemma is not between making the choice that's subjectively or objectively good, it's between two objectively bad choices once again Simm!Master fell where he stood no less than Twelve.

[mopeyy]

Awkward - Part 2

Sebastian Sallow x Reader

Part 1

angst/fluff

Summary: You and Sebastian haven't spoken since you broke up with him at the end of your 6th year, surely there won't be too much tension in your 7th year, right?

Authors notes: I finally finished pt 2! The final results of the poll was that everyone wanted a long pt 2 instead of a pt2 and 3 so that's what I did. I proofread the first half but then got too tired to keep going so there might be some mistakes. Thank you guys so much for the love on the first part and I hope this one meets your expectations!!

You opened the door to soft wind nipping at your face and sun in your eyes. You and Gareth had just walked out of Honey dukes, and he had gotten that sugar quill he promised you. "Can't believe you'd choose raspberry over cherry." Gareth said with a shake of his head. You scoffed, taking the lollipop out of your mouth to reply, "It's simply better Gareth get over it." You started to tautly wave the lollipop in his face which he laughed at, "I'm honestly kind of surprised you didn't pick orange." You stated this with a mocking tone to your voice. Gareth dramatically gasped before he let out a soft laugh, "You're not just suggesting that because I'm ginger are you" He asked with a raise of a brow. "Maybee" You dragged out the e and looked away sheepishly. This earned you a soft push on the shoulder from Gareth. "I'll let you redeem yourself for your crudeness if you come into the three broomsticks with me." You checked your watch, thinking about your answer. I suppose one butterbeer couldn't hurt. You tilted your chin up towards Gareth with a nod of your head, "I guess I'll go redeem myself then." Gareth smiled at this and you two began making your way towards the pub.

------

You watched the big mug of butterbeer slide in front of you as Gareth took a seat across from you, his own mug in hand. He had chosen a table towards the back of the building, away from the other students. You two had been going back and forth, bantering about what not before a comfortable silence fell on the table. You were having fun being out with Gareth. Unlike your friends, he wasn't constantly reminding you about Sebastian. It was early in the school year, but this was the first time you had felt calm. When you were with him you didn't have to prepare yourself for prying questions about you and Sebastians relationship. You had started thinking about the incident that happened earlier in the day. How Sebastian had stopped you after class with a hand around your wrist, and how reluctant he seemed to let it go. You thought about how he had asked you to meet him at the undercroft with a pleading undertone to his voice. You pictured his face and how different he looked compared to last year, but how he still looked like your Sebastian. Then you remembered what he said before you parted ways. How he had mumbled something about you and Gareth going on a date. You looked up at your friend across the table and saw how his cheeks held a subtle pink in them. And how his foot was tapping nervously under the table. You thought about the current events and how he had paid for your butterbeer and sugar quill without a second thought. All of a sudden you became aware of your surroundings. How the lights in the pub were dim, and how the other students in the building had the same blush in their cheeks and soft smiles, just as Gareth had. Your brows furrowed before you asked yourself the question, did you just go on a date with Gareth Weasley? You abruptly stood up, pushing your chair back in the process. Gareth looked up at you, surprised at the sudden motion. "Is everything alright?" He looked confused when asking this, as if you had three heads. "Yes, I'm alright I just..." you racked your brain for an excuse "I just remembered how much homework I have for herbology a-and plants take a while to grow so I should really get on that." were you and idiot or was that just the most unbelievable excuse ever?! "Oh, well we could still walk back to the castle together. Right?" He stood up when asking this, leaving money on the table for Sirona and beginning to grab his stuff. You didn't want to make things awkward with yet another boy in your year, so you agreed to walk back to the castle with him.

------

The sun was beginning to set, and the evening air was cool on your face. There weren't many other students walking back to Hogwarts as it was quite late, so it was just you and Gareth alone on the path. You two had been walking in silence for the most part, besides all the little comments he would make about how "beautiful the sky looks" and how "it's so much calmer without students running around." You would catch him glancing at your face every so often, but you decided not to say anything. You were scared that if you spoke, he would take it the wrong way and begin to think that you shared whatever feelings he has right now. You noticed the school was getting closer and you began to pick up your pace a little. You were eager to be back inside and end this accidental date. You did feel a little bad for Gareth, but it wasn't your fault for thinking that it would just be a fun trip to Hogsmeade with your friend. A friendship was all you wanted with Gareth, and you were determined to make this known as you walked a little further from him and chose to focus your attention to the ground instead of his face. There wasn't anything wrong with Gareth. He was kind, funny, and maybe even charming. But you weren't ready for anything more with him, especially not when Sebastian is always at the back of your mind. Sebastian. You quickly checked the time on your watch to see that it was already 9:00. You let out a frustrated sigh, Sebastian had told you to meet him at the Undercroft at 9:00! Gareth's faced switched to one of concern as he looked your way, "Is everything alright?" You bit your lip and shook your head before responding, "Yes, everything's alright. I'm just thinking about the herbology homework I told you about." He let out a sound of agreement as you kept walking. When you had finally reached the entrance of the castle, he stopped walking. You turned around to see what had happened before you noticed he was shuffling on his feet and looking quite nervous. oh no. He opened his mouth to speak before you interrupted him "Well I really have to get going so I can get a start on my homework. It's almost curfew." You saw the disappointment flash across his face before he hid it with a smile. "Right, well um I'll see you tomorrow then?" You quickly nodded trying to get yourself out of the situation "Yea tomorrow." He stepped closer to you and reached his arms out in a hug. you accepted and wrapped your arms around him. He was a bit taller than you, so your chin was tucked into his neck, and his was in your hair. When you pulled back from the hug you noticed that instead of letting go and taking a step back, he stayed in the same position. He leaned his head back, as if to get a better look at you. When he glanced down at your lips and quickly back up to your eyes you realized what he was trying to do. You quickly separated yourself from him and walked backwards to create more distance. You didn't stop walking and only rushed out a "Goodnight" before running off and trying to make your way to the Undercroft as fast as possible. When you reached the hidden room, you looked around to make sure nobody could see you, before opening the door and running down the steps. "Sebastian?" You whispered into the cold of the undercroft. When you didn't get a response you casted Confringo on one of the chandeliers which swiftly lit up the room. You took a look around before realizing that you were standing in the room by yourself. Sebastian had already left, and you hadn't had any idea of how long he could have been waiting there for you. You put your head down in defeat before making your way back to your house's dormitory.

------

The next morning at the Great Hall was nothing but unpleasant. You had tried speaking to Gareth so you could apologize for your sudden absence last night, but he seemed too disheartened to speak to you. You also attempted to speak to Sebastian, but every time you caught his eye he would quickly look elsewhere. After these failed attempts you made your way to the table where both Poppy and Natty sat. You let out an obnoxious sigh before grabbing an apple off the table, having not eaten breakfast yet. Natty laid a comforting hand on your shoulder "What's happened now?" You let out an exasperated huff, "Neither Gareth nor Sebastian will speak to me. Before I only had to worry about one boy, and now there's two." You took an angry bite out of your apple. Natty removed her hand off your shoulder and looked towards Poppy for help, "Maybe you should try and speak to Sebastian during DADA, you guys have that class together, right?" Poppy suggested this with a small smile on her face, trying to comfort you. "We do have that class together. I guess it wouldn't hurt to try."

You decided to take Poppy's advice. Once Breakfast had ended you made your way over to your first class of the day, DADA. Surely Sebastian wouldn't be able to ignore you here. As you approached the class you saw Sebastian already in his usual seat, waiting for Ominis. This was your chance! You turned around and searched for site of Ominis, hoping that he wasn't already in the class. When you saw an outstretched hand holding a blinking red wand your eyes lit up, Ominis! You ran up to him before grabbing his arm. "Hello to you too?" He chuckled with a raise of his brow. "Ominis I need your help. I have to speak to Sebastian, but he won't talk to me. Could I take your seat for today? It would only be temporary. Pleasee." You dragged out the e and made the best puppy face you could until you realized he couldn't see you anyway. He shrugged before complying, "Sure, I get more work done without his distractions. You would only be helping me." You smiled at this, "Thank you Ominis!" Now you could finally talk to Sebastian, you only prayed he wouldn't be to upset with you. As you and Ominis entered the class Sebastian looked baffled at the fact that Ominis walked right past him and that you were the one who slipped into the seat next to him. Sebastian looked irritated as he turned his head to face Professor Hecat. You realized you would have to be the first one to talk. "Sebastian," You whispered in hopes to not disturb the lesson being taught. "I'm sorry about last night, I had just lost track of time and when I did get to the undercroft you were gone. I swear that I didn't not go on purpose." You pleaded with him, but he only let out a scoff before throwing a quick glance your way. "Was your date with Weasley that good? Seeming as you 'lost track of time' and just forgot about me. Did you snog that prick as well?" His brows were furrowed in anger as he leaned back in his seat to look at you expectantly, awaiting you answer. You only rolled your eyes at this, starting to become annoyed with his attitude. "We did not 'snog' Sebastian, and it was not a date! Can you stop being jealous now because I'm trying to have a conversation with you!" You raised your voice at the last part, attracting some attention from your fellow classmates. Sebastian rolled his eyes, his cheeks growing pink in embarrassment from the sudden attention on him. He grumbled something angerly before he brought his eyes back to you, "Jealous? Why would I be jealous. If you're moving on so easily, then maybe so should I." With that, he got up and excused himself to the restroom. He didn't end up coming back to class.

------

You sat on the edge of the fountain in the Transfiguration Courtyard, listening to the sounds of the moving water to calm you. You knew that Sebastian would be upset with you, but you didn't think he would just get up and leave. In your past arguments he was always the one fighting to fix them, he hated when you two were mad at each other. But now he seemed to be fine with it. Had he truly given up on what you had? You shook your head at your thoughts. You were the one that broke up with him. If anything, you should want him to move on, right? You hadn't noticed the dejected look on your face before you felt a hand on your shoulder, "Are you alright? You seem a bit... down?" You looked up to see concerned greens eyes looking right back at you. "I'm aright Gareth I'm just, I don't know I guess I'm just trying to collect my thoughts." He simply nodded before removing his hand and taking a seat beside you. He let out a sigh before asking, "Does it have anything to do with Sallow?" He eyed you as though he knew the answer. Were you really that easy to read? You slowly nodded, "How did you know" You asked, you couldn't stop the curious expression passing over your face. Gareth only chucked at this "You two made a quite a show in DADA, you know, with him storming off and everything." Upon hearing his words, you groaned and threw your head in your hands. "It was that obvious?" You questioned him, hoping that maybe he was the only one to notice it. "Oh, it was pretty obvious, bound to be the talk of the school by Tomorow morning." He gave you a sympathetic smile before he started to fidget with his hands. "MC I'm not accusing you or anything but um..." He swallowed nervously before continuing, "Did you leave our date early because of him?" When you looked up, surprised at his question, his gaze was on the ground, trying his hardest not to meet your eyes. You had started to ramble, "Gareth i-im sorry. I didn't really know it was a date until we had finished our butter beer. It was a lovely time it really was and you're a great guy Gareth I just... I can't be anything more than friends with you. And I don't mean to sound like a prick but it's not you, its me." When you finished speaking, he lifted his head back up with a slow nod. He stood up from his spot on the fountain and moved to stand in front of you. He extended out his hand to you "Just friends then?" You nodded in agreement and shook his hand before he helped you up from your seat. "I'll see you in potions then MC." And with a soft smile he turned around and left. At least you had made amends with one of the boys.

------

You were walking mindlessly around Hogwarts. The sky outside was darkening and it was almost curfew but there was a certain Slytherin you were hoping to speak to. Each student you passed you had asked them the same question, "have you seen Ominis?" and each one replied with a shake of their head. That was until you asked Imelda "Yea, he just left the common room." You gripped both of her shoulders, "Thank you!" She looked a bit bewildered at your excitement but didn't have time to ask any questions as you had already run off. If Ominis just left the common room, he can't be too far from there. Your theory was confirmed, because as you made your way closer to the Slytherin dorm you saw ominis walking in the opposite direction. "Ominis!" You ran up to him and gave him a quick hug. "Are you going to keep screaming every time you see me today?" He asked with a chuckle. You gave him a light push on the shoulder, "I need your help. Again." He let out an exaggerated groan, "MC I helped you earlier today and look what happened." He started to walk past you, but you made sure to keep pace with him and began walking right next to him. "Ominis you're the one who told me to speak to Sebastian. I'm just trying to follow your advice. and speaking of him that's what I need your help with." He raised a brow before letting you continue, "I need help finding him and I thought you might know where he is." Ominis stopped walking to face you, "I'm actually on my way to meet him at the undercroft. We were going to practice our spells." You let out a sigh of relief. You wanted to fix this argument with Sebastian before the day ended, and now you had a way to do it. "Can you please let me go instead of you Ominis. I swear ill make it up to you." You insisted. He playfully rolled his eyes, "Ok but you need to fix whatever's going on tonight. I want my friends back." "Consider it fixed" and with that you left and made your way to the undercroft.

------

You had opened the door to the Undercroft and began making your way down the steps. You didn't try and be silent, in hopes to not startle Sebastian. When you entered the room, his back was facing you. Upon hearing the noise, he slowly started to turn around, "Ominis? What took you so long, I was starting to think you had gotten lo-" His words stopped in his throat when he saw you. His brows furrowed slightly but he quickly tried to hide any emotion showing on his face. He glared at you, "What are you doing here? Where's Ominis?" "Ominis is back at the Slytherin Dorm. I asked him if I could come meet you here instead." Sebastian let out a scoff at your answer and started trying to walk past you to exit the undercroft. You stopped him by placing a light hand on his chest, pushing him back slightly. His jaw clenched and he aimed his gaze at the ceiling. "Sebastian I just want to speak with you. I don't want to be on bad terms." You pleaded. He brought he gaze back down to you. His face showed anger, but his eyes betrayed him as you could see another emotion in his brown irises. He shook his head, "No, you don't get to do that MC. I've tried speaking to you last year, but it was obvious you wanted nothing to do with me. I'm not the one who left us on bad terms, it was you." He hissed. When you opened your mouth to respond he interrupted you, "I wasn't finished. We went through hell together in 5th year, and for you to just end it all at the end of 6th with no explanation...you have no idea what that feels like MC. When the person who knows everything about you can just walk away without a second thought. I thought that maybe this year I could try and speak to you again, that I could try and fix things. But no, you just had to blow me off because being on a date with that dick Weasley is more important to you. That night in the undercroft I was going to tell you how I missed and ask you to explain to me why you broke up with me. But I guess that doesn't matter anymore sine you've already moved on." When he finished speaking, he had a downcast expression. You had never seen so much hurt on his freckled face. It only made you feel worse knowing that you were the cause of it. His eyes bore into yours, "Please just say something." He begged. You hesitated before answering, "Sebastian I didn't mean to hurt you. I thought that by breaking up I would be helping you." You suddenly felt foolish about your reasoning and turned to look at the floor instead of his face. His silence pushed you to continue, "After everything that happened in 5th year, I felt like I was just a weight you had to carry around. I didn't want to keep being a burden to you. Whenever I had a nightmare or started to overthink you had been there Sebastian. Every time. I didn't want to slow you down a-and by constantly bringing up the trauma I feel as though I was just preventing your own healing." You were too embarrassed to meet his gaze.

You had expected him to turn and leave or continue to argue with you. What you didn't expect was for him to embrace you and tuck your head into your chest. You hesitated before returning the gesture and wrapping your arms around his middle. He tucked his head into your hair before speaking, "You could never be a burden to me MC. Never. I can't believe you had been thinking this about yourself and hadn't told me." He rubbed comforting circles into your back, trying to reassure you with his touch. You let out a sigh, "I know I just...I just felt so stupid." He leaned his head back to get a better look at you. He brought a finger down to lift up your chin, forcing you to face him. He moved his hand to cradle your face, wiping a tear away with his thumb. You didn't even know you were crying. He spoke softly to you, "Sweetheart, nothing you say could ever be stupid." He held his gaze on your lips before bringing it back up to your eyes, as if asking permission. You gave it to him with a soft nod before he leaned in and connected his lips to yours. Most of your kisses with Sebastian were usually fast and eager, as teens would often have. But this one was different. It was slow and passionate, like he was trying to give you everything you had missed. He pinched your hip causing you to gasp which allowed him to slip his tongue in. His hands ghosted down your sides before pulling you flush against him. He broke the kiss and started to trail his lips down your neck. You could feel him smirk against your neck when you had mumbled his name. The cocky Sebastian you knew was back. "Wait until Weasley hears about this." He teased. This earned him a slap on the shoulder urging him to bring his head back up to meet your eyes. "How many times must I tell you that it was not a date for you to believe it." You remarked. Sebastian made a face like he was deep in thought, looking around the room before bringing his gaze back to yours with a sly smirk on his face. "I'm not sure how many times you could tell me, but I do know some ways you can show me." You let out a laugh before he reconnected his lips with yours. You finally had Sebastian back, and things were no longer awkward.

[lynderman]

𝙁𝙪𝙩𝙞𝙡𝙚 𝙁𝙚𝙚𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 (Bruce Yamada Oneshot)

Pairing: Bruce Yamada x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 857

Date Published: 10/10/22

Sypnosis: 'Futile: Incapable of producing any useful result; pointless'. Much like your relationship with your boyfriend. Bruce Yamada.

(Idk how to feel about this, but I made it for my friend so I hope you enjoy Tori :) . )

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Another look of disappointment and heartbreak overtook your face as you looked to your right. You had learned to not cry when you saw this, as It became a regular occurrence to see your boyfriend with other girls. At this point, it was a routine for you both.

All your willpower to confront him or even shove the girl off of him left your body the second she got on his lap. You only threw your cup of juice at the two, which seemed to finally give you their attention.

As you walked off, you heard the girl scoff and argue before footsteps followed you into the foyer and out the front door. "(Y/n), Wait! I can explain!" You heard your boyfriend shout as you quickly skipped down Billy's front steps.

"There's nothing to explain Bruce!" You shouted back. You were so close to your car. A good 15 feet maybe? You extended your hand to unlock the door only for it to be grabbed by another person's. Turning around, your eyes locked with Bruce's as he gripped your wrist.

"Get the fuck off of me." You shoved his hand out of yours harshly, only for him to try and reach for it again. "Bruce, just stop. I've had enough of this bullshit." It hurt to look him in the eyes. That was something you couldn't seem to do lately. It wasn't different now; Your eyes locked onto the cement below you. "Look, I have a good explanation for this I-"

"You what?" A startled look appeared on the boys' face (although you couldn't see it). "What? What's the excuse you're gonna use this time? That you're too drunk and she looked like me? You said that last time. Maybe you'll say she approached you first. That's one you seem to love!" The small cracks in your voice gave away that you were going to break down any second now.

"No, no. It's none of those I just couldn't find you and I thought that-"

"Thought what?" Your eyes met Bruce's as you gathered the courage to face him. His orbs were slightly red from whatever the hell he was smoking early. His lips were slightly red from lipstick, with kisses all around his cheeks and jaw. It made your blood boil a bit. It used to be your cherry red lipstick that coated his face. And now it was whatever girl would let him in their pants. "I can't keep doing this, Bruce. I can't." He gave you a puzzled look. "Doing what?" You were dumbfounded at how clueless he was.

"Doing this! Playing your little games. The one where you get to pick and choose the piece you want for the night. It's always some other girl and not me! And every fucking time I catch you with her, you apologize and swear that 'You'll change' and 'Never do it again' but you don't! You stay the same man-whore everyone warned me about!"

He looked taken aback by your word choices. Hurt, even. but you didn't care. He'd hurt you all too much before.

You promised yourself you wouldn't cry. Not because of him again, but you couldn't help it. You didn't know if it was the way he looked at you or the way you so desperately wished it was you and not some random girl of the month. "(Y/n)..." You felt Bruce's hand brush a piece of hair out of your face.

"Am I doing something wrong? Is it me? Is there something wrong with me, and that's why you go find some other girl? Do I not give you enough attention? Do I annoy you too much? Am I not pretty enough? Is it my body-?" Your arms wrapped around your torso self consciously as you asked your questions. A sigh left Bruce's lips. But he didn't answer. He stayed silent.

"Am I just not enough for you? Is that what this all is?"

Another moment of silence. A sob broke from your throat as you took a step back. "I've been a good girlfriend as far as I'm concerned. I drive you everywhere, I pay for everything, I take care of you when you're hungover. I poor out my fucking heart and soul for you each and every day, Bruce. But it's still never enough for you, is it? I put in all my feelings to this relationship, only to get futile results from you right after."

Fumbling for the right key in your hand, you walked over and unlocked the door. A quiet 'Where're you going?' echoed off of Bruce. "Away from you. Anywhere where you won't be. I'm done with you and your bullshit." As you opened the door, Bruce came to the side of the car. "What'd you mean?"

"I'm breaking up with you Bruce. Once and for all."

He didn't have a chance to get any words out before you slammed the door and started the car. Standing there in awe, Bruce watched you speed off into the neighborhood. As you drove down the road, one last question repeated in your mind.

Why did you keep running to him if he was the thing you were running from?

[chilly-me-softly]

Hey I got a request Ok so basically you are John has one girl and she is a massive daddy girl and he is away at a match and John calls and she telling him u being different and he was talking to you and he ask if you are pregnant and u get annoyed at him and than u took a test than u are pregnant than when John came home you tell u baby girl she is about 2 and she was upset crying because she was saying John is her dad hope you understand x

Tears are about to come as John crouches down to say goodbye to the little one on his way to an away game. Lately, maybe cause she's growing up and understands more and more every day, but it's become really hard for him to leave every single time and for you to stay with her afterwards.

"I'll call you as soon as I get there, but only if you stop crying now" John leaves a kiss on her temple as a muffled whimper comes from the little girl with her head buried in his chest.

And the last goodbye before he closes the door behind him is up to you, as he reminds you he'll be back soon and you try to say something quick so he doesn't feel guilty. You know he cares too much for his little girl and seeing her like that every time sickens him.

He keeps his promise, even though handing over the keys and everything else took forever. He doesn't even unpack his suitcase, wanting to know if things have calmed down despite you texting him a few hours before she was silently watching cartoons.

"Hey little one" John absentmindedly strokes the screen with a thumb seeing the smile that immediately breaks out on his little girl's face.

The two engage in conversation and you're just there happily watching them interact, making sure she doesn't accidentally end the call by getting too close to the screen with her head. Until a yawn draws John's attention away from the little one.

"Oh is mummy bored is she" his cheeky smile makes you roll your eyes.

"No no, keep going"

"Mummy's tired but prettier" your little girl lifts her head towards you as you leave a kiss on her forehead for that genuine compliment, even though you don't feel at all like she just described you - at least about the second part.

"Babe" John calls you back making you look up at him, he took just a few seconds to look at you and a thought crept into his mind quickly, "you're not pregnant are you?"

"John" you huff rolling your eyes again in a few minutes, "don't do that"

"What?"

"I'm just tired. Don't turn everything into a pregnancy"

"Why are you getting so upset, I just asked a question"

"Whatever" he tries to make eye contact with you but it doesn't happen and inevitably the conversation dies just like that, with the kid regaining full attention.

By the time you disconnect the call to take the girl to bed, you have snapped back from your silence and greet John as usual. It's not that you don't want to be pregnant, but since you had been talking about the possibility of having another child there had already been too many hopes and too many negative tests and you honestly don't know why you were so upset. Maybe you really are too tired to pretend that it doesn't affect you that much.

John texts you almost half an hour later to see if you're okay, but you're too busy staring at that box in your bathroom cabinet.

-

Inevitably from the moment John returns, your little girl has a hold on him. He has barely been away a couple of days, but even when he goes off with the international team the result is always the same. You can't separate them.

"So I have to tell you something" so the best time to talk to him is before going to bed, after that long day and with the baby asleep in her room.

"Wait" you hear from the bathroom where he is as you settle with your back against the headboard, "okay, all yours. What were you saying?"

"Hmm" the words die in your throat as you see him approach you shirtless, despite all the years together and a baby - two soon - he's never stopped driving you crazy. That and then the hormones starting to kick in.

"Hey you" he taps you lightly with his foot as he gets into bed next to you and you turn slightly towards him.

"It's about the other night, I-"

"Love I'm sorry, I didn't think much about it before I spoke"

"I took the test" silence falls in the room for a moment, you see his Adam's apple go up and down as you continue to speak. "I had it and I did it, I really didn't think anything about it. But it was positive"

"Babe" John literally jumps up on the bed moving closer to you, his eyes scanning your entire body lingering several times on your stomach still too flat to notice anything. "Are you pregnant?"

"Apparently" you giggle as he pulls you to him and looks into your eyes for a moment longer before kissing you, and within moments you find yourself straddling his legs.

"I can't believe it. Oh my god can you imagine!"

"What, suddenly you can't see yourself with a house full of kids?!" you tease him putting your hands in his hair as he murmurs something squinting his eyes.

"I'm just overwhelmed"

"I know, me too"

And a month later, when you've gone to a doctor to make sure everything is going well and heard the little heartbeat for the first time, it's time to tell the soon-to-be big sister.

You even prepared a nice speech and bought a stuffed animal, but the result was not what you had imagined. You had certainly not imagined any happy faces, you knew that in the months to come you would have to prepare her as best you could and that only with everyday life would everything fall into place. But neither that she would burst into tears because this new baby would steal her father away.

"I don't want it. Me and daddy" and soon even you had shed a few tears, which you had promptly tried to keep to yourself, because of course she only cares about losing her father.

"Come here" John sits down on the floor carrying the little girl on his lap and lovingly running his thumb over her flushed cheeks. "You and I will always be together, you will always be important to me - he leaves a kiss on her temple as she sniffs - you are my princess and that will never change" the two of them are lost in their own world and you are as enchanted as ever watching them, seeing John pull her close to him filling her with kisses and she wriggles around giggling. No more tears and an even stronger feeling that he was born for that role.

"Now go and give mummy a kiss she needs it" John sets her back on her feet and in an instant you feel a weight around your legs, hands tugging at your shirt trying to get you to lower yourself urgently.

[lacktastrophe]

What are your thoughts on David and Paulo’s relationship both platonically and romantically? They have a very interesting dynamic bc David usually follows Paulo and looks up to him but sometimes swaps to guiding Paulo to improve. David also seems to have feelings for Paulo all while being a wingman for him and other characters. Daisy was also jealous of David last chapter. Their relationship is really interesting to me.

For some reason whenever someone asks me about David, I keep thinking back to Critical hit and can't get out of that zone, finding him this ultimate head scratch.

But honestly, the Paulo and David dynamic? Name a better comedy duo where the two mostly complete each other. Paulo is the straightman to David's wild shananigans most of the time. Or is he?

While there is a side of the relationship where it seems like Paulo is just keeping David contained, more often than not, David's carefree and positive attitude tend to rub off on Paulo and erase the worry. Platonically, David's a good fit for Paulo because while Paulo struggles with his own self image in various ways to ensure he doesn't disappoint David, who idolises and looks up to him, the truth is David would support him no matter who or what he turned out to be. He's also been pretty good at keeping his head most of the time, often not doing so when he's clowning around a bit.

David's love for Paulo also extends to his desires and ensuring that Paulo does achieve that love that he seeks, caring very little about the type of person in question and being objective with the end result. It comes at personal sacrifice, suggesting he pairs up with various girls in the intial stages of highschool during Paulo's aggressive and toxic masculinity in hopes he eventually does find that person that helps him achieve that happiness. This of course opens up to potential male partners once Paulo comes out as pansexual, to which David also throws his candidacy into the ring.

There's definitely enough evidence there to suggest should these two get together, David would likely do everything possible to ensure Paulo's happiness.

I feel it's natural for Daisy to feel some envy towards David because he's not as inhibited as she is with her feelings. There was nothing holding him back from throwing his candidacy into the ring and I'd have to assume he felt he knew Paulo enough already that the liklihood of a worse-case scenario like Paulo being offended and treating the friendship differently if he were to reject was non-existent. Daisy on the otherhand is overwrought with her own self-image and self-confidence issues believing that their relationship could change if she were to express some self interest in him, and there could be some merit given his past behaviour and attitude towards women, and how he's never treated her like many of the other girls. Paulo being a childhood friend for about the same length as David means just as much to her and having the dynamic change for the worst should she be rejected would just be too much for her to risk, and in her mind there's much more to lose from trying. Ironically resulting in this deadlock since he does share an interest in return, but his own issues in his self-confidence believes him not to be worthy of her.

But yeah, where Daisy is often envious because she feels other girls are prettier, younger, or fitter than she is, she envies David's openness.

[katyspersonal]

hello again, i'm the anon from the waifu/blorbo thing just checking in. it was quite surprising to see the ask i made when i was feeling sorta petty would spiral in all that lol

to answer why i stay anon, its because I'm just a "filthy lurker" tbh. im not really sociable or talented enough that i feel like interecting directly in the fandom, and i'd rather avoid the headaches that come from exposing myself to its more annoying parts lol. i understand its different for artists tho, you guys do us a great service

but Holy Shit your situation was quite bonkers. it is kind of funny that i might have helped you out with this apparently lmao. all it took was the right ask at the right time, crazy how that works

best of luck to you and thank you for being based lol. it isn't easy with such persistent haters but i hope you keep it up

Thank YOU for being based, the moment I read what you said I knew EXACTLY what you were talking about! And yes, it is a reliably stable way to piss that person off enough to 'act' by poking the holy dogma of "Maria is a masculine lesbian and everyone with a different interpretation is a bigot" with a stick in any way shape or form. Imagine being easily caught just because you can't stand bisexuals or women that can combine badassery and tenderness?

I'll have you know though, that fanart or fanfics are NOT a "rent" you have to pay to be considered a "valid" part of the fandom! You say you don't feel like you belong here... but you do, as long as you love BB and want to interact with other fans and support them. I am not the most fantastic artist either; my anatomy is still a long way to go and I finish my works very slowly, but it is my passion why I am here! :)

As for the annoying parts of the fandom,...

Honestly, you don't need to worry, at least not on Tumblr. Redditbros tend to stay away in their own circles and all you have to do is to not go on Reddit for sharing things like headcanons, drawings, ships etc. As for the bullies (oh, pardon, the completely civil people that are not encouraging harassment but simply spread "awareness" in order to excile people they dislike from the safe wholesome fandom uwu); they will typically do you a favour if they drop your name as "yiiiikes this person is nasty for [reason] block them girlies!", since this way the fake ones will self-isolate from you as a result and YOU won't see THEIR bad takes! And toxic Maria fans usually function by one 'main' guy vs their simps that got easily influenced. Before the current guy (you know who by now) it was someone else spreading bad takes about "misogynist" Gehrman and "violated masculinity" of Maria, boasting about how they ignore all lore and (mis)translation evidence against their One True interpretation. That person matured though, and the simps they influenced dissolved and became nuanced. The current guy is chronically unable to mature, learn and admit mistakes; but at the same time, popular accounts popularised a "compromise" take that portrays Gehrman as missing the mark but having good intentions that get way more traction and toxicity is overshadowed by them 🤔

What I am saying is, you can avoid annoying parts reliably easily! You probably are seeing like same two people starting controversy every time from your "corner"... and it is BECAUSE there are not that many. They are just loud. If you are in the room with 20 people, 19 of which are adults minding their own business and 1 is a screaming baby, who will you pay more attention to? I'd love to see you make an account, tbh, but if you really don't want to.. Well, still feel free to send me asks, gripes or headcanons or questions or whatnot!

[sofoulandfairaday]

Who do you think would win if Bellatrix and Snape fought?

Edit: I can't even remember when I got this ask, only that I had received it. I am so sorry that this post took me so long to write, anon, I hope I was thorough.

Uhhhhh this is such a good question! I was planning on doing a long post about them and this asks seems like a good opportunity.

I think most people in the fandom would answer Snape, but to me, Bellatrix is the more likely winner, although it could go either way. The scenarios vary. In general, they are both very talented, but Bellatrix's duelling skills are, in my opinion, unmatched; it has to be said, though, that duels are not always won by the most potent fighter, mental skills also play a huge role (the ultimate reason Bellatrix loses to Molly, alongside deus ex machina, ofc).

I'll analyse the two individually and then give you some scenarios (duels under different conditions), with the relative outcomes.

Bellatrix "She was a witch, as Harry knew, with prodigious skill and no conscience."

Bellatrix was mighty, there is no doubt about that. Her duelling skills were exceptional and second only to Dumbledore, Voldemort and Grindelwald.

Bellatrix was a mistress of the Dark Arts, she was trained by Voldemort himself (probably for many years). She was particularly skilled at the Cruciatus curse.

She was unrivalled in martial magic - curses, charms, both regular and dark - and non-verbal magic. It didn't matter how complicated the spell was, Bella could cast it without speaking a single word.

She was a very talented Occlumens (so much so that she taught Draco Occlumency and he managed to throw off Snape himself, who is considered one of the best ever) and we can presume she was also a Legilimens.

Personality-wise, her emotions seemed to ignite and fuel her power, so angering and taunting her probably only made her more dangerous.

Experience: Bellatrix was nine years older than Snape, she participated in many battles during both wars and was capable of injuring badly both Nymphadora Tonks and Kingsley Shacklebolt (powerful Aurors), capturing, overpowering and permanently incapacitating Frank and Alice Longbottom (also powerful Aurors) and blocking a spell from Albus Dumbledore himself (!!!). She easily beat four Snatchers who took her on at once and Ginny, Luna, and Hermione were having great difficulties in keeping up with her.

Snape "Snape knew more curses when he arrived at Hogwarts than half the kids in seventh year."

Snape was encyclopaedic in his knowledge: by his seventh year, he knew more about potions and spells than probably any other student in Hogwarts at the time.

He was a potions master, and not only was he flawless in brewing, but he also found ways to alter the formulas to better the result and make the process easier.

He knew the Dark Arts very well: he surely had a theoretical interest in them, but he was also said to be good at curses, so much so that he invented a powerful spell (Sectumsempra), which is something that only the likes of Voldemort and maybe Dumbledore could do.

He was also proficient in Healing magic and counter-curses, he invented the counter-curse of Sectumsempra, Vulnera Sanetur (which is impressive considering how advanced both these spells are), and he was able to contain the "very powerful curse" that was put on the Gaunt ring. He also told Dumbledore he might have been able to do more if he had come to see Snape sooner.

Occlumency and Legilimency - this doesn't require much explanation, I think. He rivalled Voldemort and Dumbledore in this.

Charms and Transfiguration - the same as above. We see his skill all throughout the books.

So. First things first. Situation A: They duel during the First Wizarding War (...for whatever reason). Bellatrix wins. Obviously. (Pun intended). While Snape was without a doubt a very skilled wizard from an early age, Bellatrix was nine years older than him, at the peak of her fighting prowess. If they had duelled when he was 18 and she was 27, and already one of Voldemort's top Death Eaters, trained by the Dark Lord himself, the fight is pretty much decided for, I think we can all agree on that.

Situation B: They duel during the Second Wizarding War (because they fucking hate each other). Err. Harder to say. They're much more equal now because Bellatrix has been in Azkaban for so long while Snape has had years to train and practice, master curses and spells of various kinds. Still, a mere six months after her escape, in the Department of Mysteries, Bellatrix takes down Nymphadora, an Auror trained by Moody himself, Kingsley and holds her own against Sirius, who is described as a good duellist, and whom she ultimately defeats (although one can argue that she only gets one good shot in, and before that the fight was well-balanced). She also blocks a spell directly from Dumbledore. Unfortunately, I happen to think that Snape would have won against all three of these people too (while he would have probably lost to Sirius in the first war) and maybe blocked the curse from Albus too. We don't know how many battles Severus has actually been in, but I don't think he would do badly at all.

I'll start by saying that they both fight dirty, so none of them has that advantage over the other. I do think that, out of the two, Bella is much more suicidal. Sev has an ounce of self-preservation more, he's probably calmer and more collected in battle, while Bella is just... scary. However, this is both an advantage and a disadvantage.

Assuming that they were both rested and ready (surprise attacks, sneaky potions in their water pre-duel, one of the two being tired after facing five opponents previously, etc. don't count).

Scenario A: Bellatrix wins. She does so because she is objectively good at magic. Snape is too, but he is no match for her. Her best chance is to go hard at him, hit him with her full might, give him no time to think things through, formulate clever responses to her attacks, to even open his mouth. Severus would no doubt be able to cleverly use Charms, Transfiguration, the environment, etc. to his advantage against her, and in the long run, as both of them grew tired, would be able to see an opening, and hit her. Hard. That is how she lost to Molly, after all.

Scenario B: Severus wins. The fight lasts longer than expected, and Severus manages to wear her out bit by bit- they're both tired, but she's more than that. She is frustrated. Because she's not winning, of course. Severus has one clear advantage over her: he's much better with words and mental stability. Call it natural disposition, or maybe it's the fact that he did not spend fourteen years locked up with soul-sucking beasts, but he can manipulate her. We can see this very clearly in HBP when Bella & Cissy go to Spinner's End. We don't know if Bella started trusting Severus more after that (I really don't think so, I think they hated each other's guts), but he pretty much sassed her out, manipulated her, and used her own personality and devotion against her. She was clearly not convinced but had no reply to offer. Not that her arguments weren't good, but Snape was better at deception. So he's able to rile her up (Bellatrix is easily riled, that's for sure- once again, she's very fiery, even though the fandom likes to call that crazy). Of course, she responds in kind, and that might really anger him, truly, but he's been called an up-jumped son of a muggle nobody, Snivellus, all his life, while she's the haughty Black heiress, to whom people bow in the streets. Snape's not an idiot, he probably sees how Bella loves the Dark Lord and basically uses that and... well, everything else he can, against her (be it Andromeda, Sirius, the Black fortune passing to Harry and not her, the years in Azkaban, her fall from grace, Voldemort humiliating her, or the fact that Rodolphus stole the last scone at breakfast yesterday, he's using it). She loses focus, and that's when he strikes. He wins.

I... I think that's it, actually. There are a number of little variants, and it might just come down to chance. Both were really powerful people though, any duel between them would have been grandiose.

[system-of-a-feather]

This isn't about remissed states, but I'm hoping it's ok to ask a different question?

We're a system that naturally switches a lot. We don't track our switches very closely (it overwhelms us and can lead to rapid switching for some reason) but as far as we can tell, we typically switch several times a day.

What we find is that if any one of us tries to hold front for too long, we get more and more fatigued. Some of us seem to get tired from it faster than others, but in general, we have a really hard time holding front for longer than a couple of hours. Which can be disruptive at times.

I've heard the term "front tired" before, but I can't seem to find any information about it besides just seeing that other people have experienced it too. What I'm wondering if you'd know is how we could increase each of our "stamina" for holding front? Is it something that gets easier with practice, or system communication, or learning how to dissociate less?

I feel it depends on what is the source of the "front tired" / front fatigue (which is what we tend to / used to call it).

Usually for us, it would be typically due to one part being stretched too thin and doing too many functioning tasks that are outside of their current wheelhouse and/or life being too much for that one part to hold the front for a while. I think what tends to help in this case is not necessarily to focus on "extending stamina" as much as it is coordinating with other parts to make the switches less disruptive and/or create a rhythm where the fronting fatigue is avoided pre-emptively / relatively expected.

In regards to coordinating with other parts, it mostly means a soft division of labor, improving communication about what you are all doing that day and in life and just trying to keep people on the same page to know how things are done. It's easier said than done but this is a lot of communication work - but occasionally when you feel front fatigue, I'd recommend trying to internally check in and see if anyone is there and - rather than being forced in or out - try to do a brief comment in passing and try to lean into it. Fighting fronting fatigue is honestly really hard and in our experience, not worth it and its a lot easier to just lean into it and invest more into making sure the person who is swapping in knows whats up.

Additionally, if you can generally estimate how long a part can typically handle the front and figure out what "rhythm" your system has, you can kind of try to make a soft schedule that serves as kind of guidelines as to when you should try to give up the front and try to find another part so that you can take a break and properly coordinate somewhat on how things are going.

Example: Riku and XIV are main hosts however both tend to get fatigued and/or very symptomatic if they are out for too long periods; as a result when we are not sitting in a final fused state, they have a rule of thumb that they both should be out for at least an hour (ideally at least 3-4 hours) a day just to pace each other's energy. Overtime by getting good at leaning into switches before they were forced to switch, they got into the habit of being able to just routinely say "hey my turn, clock out" so that the other could take a break. And we honestly very literally do talk about it like shifts at work cause thats how we've grown to see working as a system. Not one part can do all things, hell not even most things, on their own - so we have shifts where we trust other parts to do Their Stuff and then shifts where we do Our Stuff. It works out a lot better to swim with the current of DID than trying to fight the disorder

Fronting fatigue in our experience tends to come as a physiological way of our brain telling us that a certain part is at their limit for the period of time and honestly, its important to respect the limits your brain / body is telling you as identifying your limits and respecting them is a huge part of healing. Then, as you heal, in my experience your "fronting stamina" tends to extend over time as things get less taxing and parts can tolerate more time at the front.

That would be my opinion / take in regards to a more long term solution.

In the short run and/or acute run, I find that it helps to lower a lot of potential stimulus and/or stressors that might be around. A lot of dissociative folk are accustomed to being in a very dulled and muted haze and / or just straight up not mentally being present so actually being even remotely engaged in the real present moment can be overwhelming and exhausting in a way that can be pretty subtle and hard to notice until it hits you.

So sometimes, if it is possible, reducing the amount of stimuli and things around you that puts a demand on your brain to process it (sounds, smell, social interaction, temperature, etc) can help sometimes in my experience. There are also more abstract things that can add to it or reduce it though, so honestly its good in the short run to check in with yourself and ask what is "too much" and what is taking the most of your mental energy at the moment.

Not all things can be adjusted though, and it's more coping with the short term than necessarily smoothing out the long run, but coping is always better than - well - not coping XD

Also sometimes I found that when you hit a "fronting fatigue" wall, sometimes just dropping what you have been doing and completely changing gears to something else (often opposite) can be a good way to reset shit, the only issue is - in my experience - that tends to require executive function that I don't usually have when I hit those walls XD But I have before just hit the wall and wanted to / needed to stay front for one reason or the next and I'd go from being online or doing homework to just get up and sit under a tree with my birds and draw for a bit. Shake things up a bit, but honestly, this is stupid hard to do when the fatigue hits so it might not be worth it either but, hey worth sharing.

But TLDR, yeah it gets better with time and with practice for the most part.

(PS: Honestly if anyone has any questions I'm honestly having a ball answering these cause its kind of astonishing how much cohesive our understanding of system dynamics are and how much of a larger picture we have of things as a whole, which like the Ray part of our brain is like "its really not anything special" cause that part of our brain is the Main Gatekeeper meanwhile the Riku part of our brain - who is a very very proud know-nothing himbo - is just radiating shook at how clear things are and its both funny and amazing)