#I could pull off a list tbf

[ndostairlyrium]

she kinda is but she also lowkey isn't

[arolesbianism]

Breakcore may not be a super strictly defined genre but I swear ppl will call anything that has noises at all like y'know music has like just normal ass music from any other genre breakcore with a straight face and I just have to sit there and try to not reveal I'm a pretentious fuck when it comes to this stuff

[danieyells]

Could I pretty please ask for any Haru stuff you found? 🥺 I've been afflicted with the Haru simp disease and only information/content of him can cure me 🛐

HARU'S CHANGED MY FEELINGS ON HIM not that i disliked him at all before but like. . .you know how he acts like the team mom? His voicelines make this worse. I thought he was more like a meddlesome but chill guy with a lot of energy. The truth is this poor man is a single mother with two unruly kids, a house full of animals, and VIRTUALLY NO HELP BESIDES YOU. No wonder he drinks nearly every fucking night. I get why Jabberwock doesn't have ordinary students but jesus christ please get some helpers in here. My man is overworked.

I ended up putting almost all of them in because. . .he is struggling poor boy. I have officially edited this to contain all of Haru's voicelines! Sorry for the wait!!

Hello: (the first time the game is opened after that character is set as home screen NPC. Only happens once per day, unless the character is switched out and back.)

"Hey, nice timing! One sec, I've just gotta finish feeding everyone."

You've Got Mail: (whenever there's something in the inbox, usually Arena rewards)

"You've got some letters! Better open them before that goat lookalike makes a meal out of them!"

Default: (requires no affinity, has no time constraints)

"Folks are going wild over the Anomalous Animal Back To Nature Tour, and this is your chance to experience it at a discount rate! C'mon, help me hand out these fliers!"

"Everyone stuffs up sometimes. Don't let it get to you—just think of it as a funny story you can pull out later and laugh at! Gahaha!"

the only way he knows how to cope with his pain is to laugh at it. . .my therapist told me that was good actually! he's well adjusted! disregard the nightly drinking.

"You sure are fond of {PC}, aren't you, Peekaboo? You did nothing but bite me for the first three days after we met."

tbf you were from another house and it was probably fresh after the clash. . . .

"You reckon I work hard? Nah, this is nothing to write home about. All right, let's head to the next zone!"

"Hey, nice work out there today! Let's knock a few more jobs off the list then take a break, hey?"

oh my god you take breaks? or are you telling the player to take a break while you keep overdoing it. . . .

Affinity 1: (between 5am and 11am)

"Morning! Let's get this show on the road!"

Affinity 2: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Hey, {PC}! What a coinkydink! I just finished my rounds."

Affinity 3: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Ren? He's working at that whacky restaurant again. I'll have to go pick him up later."

Affinity 4: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Towa's off to that hill again? I was gonna ask him to hold down the fort... Guess I'll have to stay put tonight."

Affinity 5: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Am I tired? Nah, don't worry, if there's two things I have confidence in it's my stamina and my bad luck!"

Affinity 6: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"The Sinostra folks are causing a kerfuffle again... I don't need any of that! You should take care not to get dragged into their mess too, you hear?"

Affinity 7: (between 11am and 4pm)

"You wanna know how to get the animals to like you? You just gotta show how much you love them, like this— Ow! Don't bite me, Peekaboo!"

Affinity 8: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"None of our critters have warmed to Ren at all, even though he spends all day with them... Guess that handsome face only works on humans."

Affinity 9: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Phew, time for a bre— Hm? That sounded like the Capybus! I'm gonna go check on her, watch Peekaboo for me!"

Affinity 10: (between 10pm and midnight)

"All right, the kids are all in bed. I'll just ask those two to hold down the fort, then I'll head out for a little walk..."

Affinity 11: (between 5am and 11am)

"I went to wake that sleepyhead Ren up this morning, but it was like he couldn't see me even though he was looking straight at me. Reckon his eyesight's bad?"

Affinity 12: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Course I eat, don't worry about that! Just earlier I pinched some of Peekaboo's veggies when I was making his lunch and had them with a piece of bread!"

Please eat food. . . .

Affinity 13: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"So much to do... Gotta take in the washing and get the shopping done... Argh! There's not enough hours in the day!"

Affinity 14: (between 5am and 11am)

"This? It's an energy drink. Don't feel like the day's started till I have one. (gulp) (gulp) Pwaaah!"

PLEASE EAT FOOD AND SLEEP. . . . . . . . .

Affinity 15: (between 5am and 11am)

"Ah man, there's soap all over the walls again! You're so good at playing with the animals Towa, if you could just learn how to clean up after you'd get full marks..."

Towa i love you but please help your mother boyfriend captain. . . .

Affinity 16: (between 11am and 4pm)

"Ah! I can't do dogs! How'd you get in here?! Towa!! Come here!! No!! Don't bite me!!"

He is terrified of dogs????? Towa absolutely electrocuted the shit out of that dog. Rip in pieces. That dog truly fucked around and found out. It will never go in the dorm again.

Affinity 17: (between 10pm and midnight)

"Thanks for helping out again today, you're a real lifesaver. Sorry I can't walk you back..."

Affinity 18: (between 8pm and 5am)

"You reckon I look like an acrobat when I'm using my stigma? Gahaha! Maybe I'll practice balancing on a ball then!"

Baby no you are not a clown please what if you break something again--

Affinity 19: (between 10pm and midnight)

"...(gasp) Crap, I fell asleep... Did you put this blanket on me? Cheers... Maybe I'll grab a few more minutes..."

Affinity 20: (between 5am and 11am)

"I swore I'd take responsibility for protecting all the lives in this park. I can't let anyone die on my watch."

Affinity 21: (between 11am and 4pm)

"I don't know where I'd be without all the critters in this place if I'm honest with you. Well, gotta be my animal magnetism that's keeping them here anyway! Gahaha!"

Affinity 22: (between 4pm and 8pm)

"Hm? There's some critters whose nails were getting dangerously long so I was giving them a clip. Come here, I'll do yours too if you want!"

Affinity 23: (between 8pm and 5am)

"Oh, off for a cheeky night out? Gahaha! I know a good place, want me to take you?"

get wasted with him and give him somebody to talk to!! he needs someone besides romeo and rui to listen to him rant sometimes!

Affinity 24: (between 10pm and midnight)

"A soft bed to lie down in and someone to chat with till I drift off... I'm really living the high life here."

He's a simple man. . .it's easy to imagine him holding your hand here while he dozes off. . . .

Affinity 25(max): (no time constraints)

"Really learned the ropes here, haven't you? Once we have a little cash to spare, I'll buy you your own Jabberwock uniform!"

they must be expensive if it takes until Affinity 25 to get you one! He's so conscious about his finances(disregard all of the stuff he buys and never uses--) that being given a purchased gift is surely the highest tier of affection from him haha. But also. . .he treats the anomalous animals and oftentimes even the other ghouls in Jabberwock like they're his kids. This is his way of saying 'you're part of this family too.' Which is very sweet.

Spring: (March-May) (between 5am and 11am)

"Today's shearing day for the fluffy squad! It's actually a pretty hefty task, so I've gotta hop to it if I want to be done before summer..."

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Bucket, check. Trowel, check. Me and Towa are heading to the mountains to pick some veggies. You wanna come?"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"We've been getting a lot of balmy days lately, and the sun's up longer. Can't help but dilly-dally when I'm working..."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"I've gotta clean out all the sparrow nests soon or they won't be able to look after their kiddos properly. Looks like there's... 61 nests total..."

Summer: (June-August) (between 5am and 11am)

"A lot of customers have been saying they wanna stay cool in the summer so I changed up the course. Now we have a special summer-only waterside tour!"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"It's hot so I invited Ren to go fishing, but his face screwed up like a prune and he yelled at me. What's he got against fish?"

Probably the same thing you have against dogs. . . .

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Phew... Finally finished harvesting all the feed crops for the day... Everyone's health is dependent on their quality, so now's the time to do it right."

(between 8pm and 5am)

"Lotta bugs around this time of year... But they're important for the food chain, so I've gotta take care of them... Argh!! Give it a rest with the buzzing!"

Autumn: (September-November) (between 5am and 11am)

"Hey, nice timing! I'm about to make a fire with the dead leaves I collected so I can bake some potatoes, take a seat!"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"I like the Jabberwock uniforms. They're made out of high-performance fabric that keeps you warm when it's cold out and safe when you're handling venomous critters!"

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"The hibernation squad's gonna start eating us out of house and home this month... The food bill's gonna be rough... Eeek!"

(between 8pm and 5am)

"You reckon that's a rabbit on the moon? No way, it's a toad! C'mon, look closer!"

apparently the pareidolic toad in the moon is a Chinese myth! I wonder if they mean to suggest Haru is actually Chinese.

Winter: (December-February) (between 5am and 11am)

"Rounds are quicker in winter since some of the critters hibernate. Makes things a little easie— Why's the kitchen on fire?!"

(between 11am and 4pm)

"Brr... Can't help but get green-eyed looking at the furry critters when it's this cold..."

(between 4pm and 8pm)

"Nice and toasty... Hm? I'm talking about Peekaboo! He's better than a hot water bottle in this weather!"

Haru putting Peekaboo on your tummy when you're having cramps or just in pain in general is a cute mental image, especially since Peekaboo likes you lol

(between 8pm and 5am)

"It's cold outside so some of the critters have been sneaking into our rooms at night. You heard Ren scream just now, right?"

His birthday: (September 20th)

"It's my birthday?! Oops, totally slipped my mind... Thanks for remembering!"

Your birthday:

"Happy birthday. The Capybus is all yours today—I've got a custom birthday tour all planned out for you!"

New Years: (January 1st)

"Happy New Year! How'd I ring it in? I was milking the cow and when I looked up I'd totally missed the first sunrise! Gahaha!"

Valentine's Day: (February 14th)

"You're kidding, I can really have this?! They say a little sugar helps sweeten a tired day! Thanks a million, this'll keep me going a while!"

White Day: (March 13th)

"Ta-da! I bought you some hand cream, for the chocolate you got me last month. Thanks for everything you do here."

hand cream when you do all of that manual labor and probably have to wash your hands a lot is a really practical gift actually, gg haru

April Fool's Day: (April 1st)

"Can you believe this? Ren got up early, and Towa fed everyone for me! ...Tried to make a joke for April Fools but it just made me feel empty inside..."

Halloween: (October 31st)

"Check it out! The pumpkin Capybus, in town for three days only! I sacrificed sleep and some of our budget to get her ready!"

If it's painted I really hope that paint is waterproof. . .never know when Towa's gonna make it rain. . . .

Christmas: (December 25th)

"Merry Christmas! This is a reindeer, she lives up in the mountains! And I'm Sagara Claus! Gahaha!"

just don't let romeo see it lolol

Idle: (about 20 seconds without interacting with the game) (below 13 affinity)

"Hey there, miss! Looking gorgeous as ever! ...Wait, I was kidding! Come back!"

(13 affinity and above)

"You seem pretty flat out today... Nothing for it, I'll get a few other things out of the way while I wait for you to get back."

Absent: (logging in for the first time in 2 or more days?)

"Phew, that's a relief... I was worried one of ours ate you... Glad to see you back."

Once again. . .an absolute sweetheart. And a single mother who is desperately in need of some help around the house. That April Fool's line really got me lolol poor guy. All of his have a lot of energy to them so i feel like i posted more than Haku, who's kind of a more low key guy lol. . . .

[claraswritings]

Girl, write the Luca reader size kink one from your NSFW list 👀 or the love egg one 👀 pleassseee

I’ve been wanting to write this for a while tbf 😏 I’ve combined them both into one.

SMUT BTC

Reader is mentioned to be a short girlie. Luca is very attentive but also a bit of a tease, praise, size kink- Luca is hung change my mind, use of toys on R, unprotected sex, cream pie, established relationship.

“So the thing about…” You were cut off as a sudden jolt between your legs caused you to shift on the chair, earning you a concerned look from the man opposite.

“Are you okay?” He asked concerned as another shock hit you.

“Mmmhmm, Excuse me,” you said trying to keep your cool, as you leant to the side and locked eyes with Luca and he smiled at you. He had one hand around a glass of water and the other in his pocket, doing something only the two of you knew, as he conversed politely with a man and woman. “I really have to go”

You legs shook a little as you stood, shifting on one foot to the other, hoping that you looked like you were just adjusting your outfit as you made your way toward him.

“Hi, my love” he said as you approached, a sweet smile on his face like he hadn’t just been messing with you via the small remote in his pocket seconds ago. He took his hand out and wrapped it around your waist, circling you with ease and pulling you in close to him as he introduced you to the two he’d been speaking to. “I’ve missed you”

The intense pulsing between your legs lessened and you relaxed a little, leaning on Luca, your arm going around him to give yourself a moment to breathe.

“I missed you too, darling, why don’t you introduce me.” You said politely.

“This is my gorgeous girlfriend” Luca leant down and you leant up to meet his lips, tiptoeing up even though you were wearing heels. His arm supported you, and gave you a squeeze around the waist. He took the opportunity to lean down and whisper in your ear. “So cute you still have to reach to kiss me even in those heels,” He kissed you again, sweet as ever like he hadn’t just been teasing you minutes ago.

Luca loved how much short you were. He found it adorable how you’d stand on tiptoes to kiss him, and lift yourself to put your arms around his neck, relying on him supporting your waist as you did, and how you’d always ask him to get things off high shelves for you, how protective he looked of you, how he could sit you on his lap and pull you back against him as he slept.

You, of course, loved how tall he was. How safe you felt with him, how his big strong arms felt wrapped around you in bed. How he was always, despite his size, so gentle and sweet with you. You loved borrowing his shirts and hoodies and how they’d go to your knees or more.

You smiled as Luca continued his introductions, nodding and making small talk. You were somewhat grateful for the moments reprise from his button pressing, however as you mingled with him at your side, his hand would often dip only slightly into his pocket as if the temptation, the need to tease you was almost getting the better of him. And as you took your seats for a meal, it did.

Luca made as if he was adjusting his keys and phone in his pocket and tapped on the remote a few times, causing you to jerk in your chair, hands gripping your glass tightly.

The man opposite who’d been attempting to converse with you gave you a quizzical look

You crossed your legs squeezing tight, lifting up hoping to ease up some of the pressure as Luca only increased it, as jabbed at the button through his pocket.

Your knuckles were now white around the glass and you were positive the heat was now creeping up your neck.

Luca could see you were desperate for the pressure to ease and pulled your knee closer to him, knocking your legs further apart and to anyone else it was a subconscious affectionate gesture, it looked like he was just pulling you closer, but to you and Luca it was him silently saying ‘don’t try that, i want you to feel every second of this’

Under the guise of pretending you were tired you rested your head on Luca’s arm, burying in it and let the vibrations hit you, letting out sighs only the two of you could hear.

“Work tomorrow” is the excuse Luca made minutes later, as he followed only a few minutes after you made your excuses advising you were ‘just tired’. Luca met you outside the main hall, to take your hand in his and lead you through the corridor and down to a side room.

His arms snaked around your waist the second you closed the door and without any trouble, he lifted you up and had you pressed against it. His tongue worked in your mouth as he manoeuvred your legs around his waist. You let out a moan into his throat at the sudden manhandling and dragged your hands through his soft blonde waves causing him to bite your lip. You’d almost definitely messed up his hair but at this point neither of you cared. Plus you loved his messy hair look.

“You like how easily I can lift you, love” he pulled back enough to whisper in your ear, holding you up as he licked and sucked on your pulse point, intent on leaving marks that would purple in minutes. “Like me holding you like this darling?”

You ground against him as nodding wordlessly, as you felt his large hands rub up your thighs and under your dress, squeezing, gripping you.

“This okay?” He whispered into your ear, biting at your earlobe

The squeeze was something he often did, a request to see if it was okay for him to carry on and you nodded again.

“Yes Luca. God yes”

Without saying anything else, he lifted up from where he’d had you pressed into the door and carried over to a ledge with ease, placing you down on it and pushing one of his muscular thighs between your legs. You dragged against him unable to catch your breath as his hands continued their kneading at your thighs causing you gasp out in anticipation of the marks that his fingers would no doubt leave, hopefully to match the ones on your neck.

He slid one of his hands out and tipped your face back gently to meet his, and kissed you open mouthed, a mess of tongues and lip biting, and hot breathy sighs.

Your hands made their way to his belt, trying to undo it and pushing it down feebly, too distracted by Luca’s other hand now up against you, strong fingers now rubbing the material of your already soaking underwear.

“Fuck, babe, you’re soaking already and all for me?”

Still grasping weakly at his button, Luca leant down to you again and kissed you before he took over and pushed them down, smirking as your eyes drifted to the prominent bulge against his boxers.

“All for you”

You babbled, mind blank in your haze as you could see Luca’s outline now through his boxers. It was all you could think about, thick, half-hard and heavy and all for you.

The thought made your mouth water. A part of you wanted to slide off the counter and have him in your mouth there and then but the ache between your legs convinced you to stay where you were but you lifted your hips again to try drag your soaking core across the fabric, eliciting a shudder from you that had you even more needy.

“Ah. Patience, love, I need to make sure you’re ready.” Luca said giving you a long kiss and using one hand to hold your hip, holding you down with ease. “You know I do”

He reached into his pocket now halfway down his muscular thighs and pressed the control for the toy again, tapping it on to the slowest setting and then to the middle, slow again, middle, high, slow, high, middle and then slow as you tipped back against the ledge.

His other hand left from your hip, now trusting you were too blissed out and dipped into his boxers to take long strokes up and down his length with his other hand as he did, eyes not leaving yours, watching you writhe.

You could have almost came right there, watching him, eyes half focused, touching himself over you. After a few moments, he was aching for you, for the second time in a few minutes wanted to reach over and have him in your throat. How delicious he’d feel in your mouth, poking the back of your throat, your tongue along the ridges, mouth hollowed out to accommodate his girth. The thought along combined with the images of him and the vibration between your legs had you reaching your peak.

As he eased up on the toy lowering the settings down and breathing heavier now, Luca pulled you closer around him, pressing himself, now hard and leaking against you, through your wet underwear letting the vibrations linger ““Fuck. I can feel it” he muttered.

“Luca”

“You’ve done so well, love.” His hand reached into your hair and gently carded it using it as leverage to tilt you back and expose your neck. A strangled gasp was about all you could manage. His thick cock was so close to you and you’d have sworn it was killing you that he wasn’t already inside you.

“Luca. Please.”

“You want me to fill you, my love” his hands fell to your hips, as he motioned his head, a silent question of if it was okay to lift you onto the counter top, answered by your nod.

“I love you.” He said pressing his forehead to yours “I love you so much my darling” he kissed you softly.

His free hand reached between your folds and inside you, grasping around the vibrating toy and sliding it out, placing it beside you. You moaned at the loss of sensation, and sudden emptiness.

“What’s wrong, love?” He cooed in your ear, “Thought it was too much when it was in you and now you want it back? Can’t make your mind up?”

“No Luca. babe. I want you” you gasped, an arm reaching to drape over his shoulders.

His fingers pushed your underwear to the side before lining his cock up against your entrance and guiding himself against you gently, his tip spreading you until he pushed just past your entrance and your head tipped back, causing you to gasp as you felt a delicious pressure, stretching you around him.

“You okay, my love.” Luca said and your eyes shot up to him. you’d never wanted him more. Slightly in you, hair messy, shirt half undone and still checking in So perfect, so Luca.. “You feel so good”

Luca eased into you, savouring how you took him inside, inch by inch, his girth causing you to hiss out.

Your hands were grasping weakily at his shoulders. Nails digging in, leaving marks you’d trace with your tongue and kiss better with your mouth later.

“More, babe, more” you gasped out.

“You like how big I am don’t you…” Luca asked, his spare hand dropping to between your legs to rub at your clit “you love being stretched out don’t you babe”

He got off on the sheer size difference, you both did, but even like this, he was still checking in on you.

“Yes Luca,” you reassured him, the rubbing on your clit as well as the way you were taking him making you a little breathless “I love it. Feels good when you make me fit you.”

Luca let out a low groan and started slowly edging into you. The sensation of each inch has you gasping against him, desperate for him just to push into you fully. It takes a minute or so but when he’s bottomed out inside you, pushed so deep inside you that you’re actually gasping, he leans forward and kisses you

“You feel amazing, my love,” he starts gentle, each thrust, each roll of his hips like he was deliberately savouring how it feels to push in and out of you. “Taking me so well”

He pressed down on your stomach as he slipped in and out of you, feeling himself move inside you and let out a guttural sound

“Can feel myself fucking you…god fucking incredible, like you were made for me” You could see him staring, eyes heavy at where he’s connected to you, as if he’s trying to memorise just how he slides in and out of you, just how you look filled out with him.

And you think you were and he was made for you. It’s the only way this can be this good.

He pushes in and the squeeze of your tight walls around his cock has him grasping for your thighs to ground himself. Luca quickens his pace, your wetness allowing him to speed up.

His hands moved to your hips as he bucked into you harder and faster, causing you to let out the most intense moans he’s ever heard and it’s so delicious that he swore if he could scoop that up and sell the sound as dessert he’d be the richest man alive.

Luca could barely hold on as he felt himself twitching inside you as you rose up, off the ledge, squeezing him with your walls, and gyrating against him as he ups his thrusts. You seized around him as you peaked

“In me, Luca. Cum in me, wanna be full of you, fill me please”

You can tell he’s close and you asking, no, begging for him to finish in you is enough to send him over the edge only seconds later, coating deep inside you and giving you exactly what you’d wanted. Luca stayed inside you, making sure to milk every last drop into you.

After a few seconds of catching your breaths, he gave you a once over, checking if you’re okay, and kissing you and telling you he loves you. Attentive and sweet just after he’d fucked your brains out.

You nodded and moved to get down before Luca placed a single hand on your thigh.

“Oh we’re not done yet.” Luca tilted his head, a stray curl falling down over his forehead. He reached for the love egg with one hand and looked at you, searching your eyes for approval. Your slight nod was all he needed as he spread you open with his other hand and slipped it back in, using the slick from both your releases to guide it deep into you.

You squirmed enjoying the feeling as he pressed it in and then licked his fingers clean before kissing you full on the mouth.

“Think I can make you come twice from across the room my love?”

[flyingfabio]

Why have you had Pecco tag blocked? Did he pull the same media shit with Fabio? I am new just 2 months here

hello anon and welcome! ok so this is gonna be long because i want to explain and avoid people taking it the wrong way. first i have to admit it's been a long time and i don't remember exactly what event promoted me to block pecco's tag but it was probably not long after his dui in 2022. believe it or not, it had nothing to do with what pecco could have said about fabio, because i think pecco appreciates and respects him a lot and i don't remember pecco saying anything bad about fabio (in the media at least lol). 

so. i think i already spoke about it but pecco has a habit of saying things that come out as ignorant or as things a '''spoiled brat''' would say. like him and jack miller moaning about not being 'test riders' to ducati, while as a factory rider you know you have to lead developmental work and while ducati was already delegating a lot of the work to the satellite teams anyway (pramac mostly). his reponse after his dui that was half-assed and that he deleted from his socials two days after. often not taking full responsibility for his many crashes etc.

pecco is also guilty (and it's not his fault tbf) of being ducati's number one rider and by this point i think y'all know my griefs with ducati. i don't want to go into details, but it's how they manage riders and the whole way they operate that piss me off. as an example, the way they dealt with pecco's dui really rubbed me off the wrong way. basically they tried with their life to brush it off under the rug, they sent threats to a journalist on whatsapp and eventually blacklisted him from ducati events for a year after he asked about this incident in the press conference because yaknow... why should a championship contender in one of the most famous motorsports being convicted for dui be a big deal right?? also in 2022 when fabio was fighting for his life alone on his shitty yamaha, ducati sending half-veiled orders to his satellite teams to basically not race pecco didn't go well with me obviously. and it's not like it's only assumptions, zarco admitted it on tv and the way some of the ducati management looked at enea who didn't give a shit about orders and raced pecco anyway made it obvious. can you believe people were discussing the possibility of ducati riders letting pecco pass if he was lower than 7th or something and fabio was leading in the gp of the title decider to prevent fabio from winning the championship? people nowadays might not find ducati having 8 bikes that bad because they're all fighting each other but not so long ago the fight included another manufacturer and you might wonder if this situation isn't an open door for manipulations we don't want to see ever in our sport...

AND it was a period around here (the tumblrina palace) when SOME pecco fans were mmh... extreme and unsufferable to say the least. and like i know i'm a fabio extremist and i know i can piss people off (sometimes i'm annoying myself lol), but i don't go and publish fucking tumblr polls about '''whom from my most behated motorsports men should be guillotined''' with marc and fabio (obviously) listed as choices... you could understand how i didn't want to ever see this on my dash (never felt better than after blocking that person). also generally their attitude of 'pecco never does anything wrong' when he DOES do wrong is tiring at some point...

[ifreakforicecream]

COD MODERN WAREFARE 3 Predictions

Disclaimer: I have never played the games I am just doing this for my own enjoyment (I don’t have 70$ lying around) I am going off of cutscenes, the wiki and other people’s head cannons. I kind of wanna see how this list plays out once the new missions come. (This barbie has to draft 30 sheets of site analysis for a presentation but is doing this instead) I will probably update this with coloured text as it goes

also, lmao mw3 getting revealed by monster energy drinks has the same energy as the previous installments being revealed by Dorito Chips or when hero movies get early reveals from toy/action figure patents.

Graves does come back but only as an operator for the multiplayer games. Conversely, He could be an illegal arms dealer but in hiding (think MacAfee before they found him). Shepherd has a higher chance of going in that direction in my books. Update: he comes back completely unscathed and going by the new trailer he's siding with Farah and Alex? oooo this gonna get messy (28/7/23).

Price, Laswell, or Gaz dies. Sort of a riff off from the originals I’m guessing the writers are trying to find some form of subversion but this is where it's at (oof)

Farah or Alex dies and neither of them finishes what they started. My money is on Farah tbf.

Gaz dying makes sense in the way that he started with wanting to do right by people when he first met and would probably die that way too. or this being a red herring price jumps in for him and dies and then takes his place which seals his fate as the MC of this installment.

Laswell goes out of the way of aiding a mission when she was expected/advised not to.

Laswell gets a protégé that will replace her in a much later installment. It has a shot at being Gaz man just collects good intel.

more female ops? I like to think COD writes them pretty damn well. (at this point my standards are must pass the Bechdel test. which is not a bad benchmark considering its flaws but not great either)(this is also where I found out the first installment of Twilight passes the Bechdel test. go figure)

Gaz replaces Laswell and Ghost takes Price’s place.

Price dies while killing Makarov. or we get him smoking a cigar as he is introed making it a full-circle moment once more.

Ghost trades bullets with shepherd but only shepherd dies. Many have said the reboot plays it safe so I am going off of that assumption here slightly but ik a lot of og gamers of the previous titles would find that satisfying.

In the wiki, it states that the shadow company is disavowed but that might change. I didn’t check the established title (Like if it was private or public) of such a company but there might be a line of succession here. for what they have in assets it seems too big to be disavowed.

we get a partial face reveal of the ghost. It could be something mundane as smoking or a teasing jump cut. it’s just like barely there.

everyone gets promoted: It happened after the mission in the ghost's origin story. It’s a hefty mission they just survived. I would be surprised if they didn’t. with shepherd gone this swings either way. or gets buried under the rug as it is a mission hidden from the public.

Roach gets in the picture. he also wins the IDGAF wars or is second to Price in that regard.

regional operators? They were all over the place in past titles and with las almas this seems the least farfetched. (hoping for some Indian or Nepalis operators woo)

someone from 141 or affiliated gets kidnapped or “killed” but it’s that “lucky death” situation that COD likes to pull like it did with Alex. This happens towards the end or at a start of a mission season.’

Shepherd is the actual villain and they kill off Makarov pretty quick as a subversion of the original title. Again moot, if you consider the potential monster energy leak his face is in red behind price.

price dies, Gaz finishes the job.

this is more of an anti-prediction: the price isn’t gonna be the main character but the most prominent. (also going by the monster leak) ghost was the last game’s MC I don’t think they were married to his POV all that much even though it played a huge role.

ghost dies, and Soap finishes the job. “you wanna be better than me Johnny” or Johnny dies saving Ghost in the final moment.

Makarov operates the no Russian mission remotely and he acts as a clean nationalistic politician, making him more dangerous and will cause international trouble when apprehending him. (a lot of opposing politicians or figures “fall out of windows” in the process.

The ghost team carries over to Russian soil.

141 gets bigger and possibly with pre-existing operators within the game.

shepherd gets murdered by a more evil boi/girl

ghost’s tattoo design has a canonical refresh/update. The grey fleece jacket comes back.

Soap recovers while Ghost hunts for Shepherd solo. (this happens right after the final mission or the bar scene)

Every now and then a COD title comes out with a new game mechanic or a way to play. In this installment, I am predicting laser sights for night missions.

Heavier lean on digital/informational warfare.

we don’t get much about ghosts. RalphsValve said there might be a spinoff personally I don’t this will ever happen but it’s a tossup considering the original investor report saying mobile makes 40% of revenue but the Microsoft acquisition may change things ( also wonder where product collaborations are at on that investor report probably not that sizable but still worth a look). Conversely, he’s ghostie has become a character favorite and the market landscape has changed drastically in the last 10-20 years and he already has source material. BTW I read that Origin comic That poor fucker can’t catch a break. Brother looked so red-eyed when he hit the tarmac when he met Soap.

[spacepiratenemo]

Firecracker & Cheeks

https://www.instagram.com/r0tt3n_rabbit_/

#canonxoc interaction post!

#portgasdace - #spacepiratenemo

I needed something wholesome, playful and something to make me smile! So, I drew Nemo being the usual lil’ shit she is, bragging and being a brat as always, playfully provoking the friendly punishment that is about to be served!

TBF! Nemo does have quite the loose tongue and an even cheekier potty-mouth! Sometimes she’s a lil’ savage, sometimes she’s gonna drop you the mic and often she will tongue-twist a diss that would make a rapper like Busta Rhymes blush! So let’s be real - That tickle-attack she earned herself yet again was well deserved!

Ace, smirking cheekily, having a firm grip on the space punk: Not so smart now, are you?!

Nemo, laughing maniacally, being tickled relentlessly: HAHAHA! STOOOOP! My tummy hurts! Have mercy with me, Firecracker!

A: No mercy in war!

N: Please! I swear I’m not gonna do it again!

A: That’s a lie and you know it!

N: That ain’t fair! You’ve got muscles! Someone! Help me!

Whitebeard: Marco, hold her feet so Ace can tickle her even better!

N: WHAT THE HELL HAVE I EVER DONE TO YOU???!

Marco: Do you want the list in alphabetical or chronological order?

Ace, laughing his ass off: So, what are you gonna do now, Cheeks?!

Nemo, trying to pull off the puppy-eyes-move now: Pleeeeeaaasseeee? I’ll behave! I promise!

Ace, not buying it, but stopping the tickles for a moment to let her breathe: Really?

N: …

A: …

N: … NO!

The tickles shall continue until less cheeky behaviour has been archived for the next two hours!

If you love to irk people, you might want to have the muscle to fight the payback! Nemo might have a brain so smart that Einstein would feel stupid, but she also is silly enough to provoke this little fight over and over, fully knowing, she ain’t got no chance! But thb, tickles and playful games with the Firecracker are simply the best!

"If I could sell your soul for a coconut… I would." - Nemo

You can find my fanfiction on my Wattpad :3 Likes, shares and comments are much appreciated 🤍

"There's more than sixtillion trillion stars, planets and homes in this universe with more living souls than one googilion could count, and I was lucky enough to meet you, Firecracker!"

"Well, I just woke up! What did you expect? Confetti?", Nemo after hissing at Marco who tried to be funny and pull a joke before she had coffee.

"Do you think you can fix it?", asked Jozu, worriedly gazing at the broken down medical machine. "Am I a joke to you?", words spoken by Nemo without vocalisation, but only a look of her eyes, which switched her gaze from the highly advanced spaceship to the oldschool, badly engineered medical machine of the pirate crew.

[mayguardian]

F1 Drivers in Performing Arts

lol i forgot to post the rest of these so here’s choir

Carlos:

baritone

dramatic at that

deluded both himself and the director into putting him into SATB tenor somehow

classically trained 

grew up singing in those catholic children's choirs

wanted to be a countertenor (special) and was devastated when his voice dropped after puberty

vibrato addict

sounds unbelievably comical next to nico “what is head voice” hulkenberg

featured in student showcase

candide in make our garden grow (the finale)

the role is listed for tenor and i know nothing about vocals so idk if he could pull off the sustained F4

it’d actually be far funnier if he couldn’t tbf 

fernando hounds him to join theater but he thinks he’s above broadway singing 

Hulk:

bass (SATB)

doesn’t know his voice type and doesn’t care to know

it says bass on his folder so that’s what he is

can’t actually read music so he has to memorize all his parts 

has to be reminded to look at the folder to maintain plausible deniability

took him 6 months to figure out solfège 

almost quit when he found out about accidentals

never did music before choir and will never do it after

do NOT chat to him about technique he’s stressed enough

fernando only ever asked him to join theater once

killer louis armstrong impression and performed with jazz band once

actually enjoyed it more than choir

Lance:

tenor section leader

sectionals are like something out of glee or maybe degrassi

the tenors are passive aggressive and also the worst gossips in the whole PA building

nepo baby (family name is on the PA building)

imagine if both ryan and sharpay from hsm had sharpay’s personality

that’s lance and his sister (soprano section leader)

gets solos he probably shouldn’t 

probably better suited to poppy/jazz performance

would actually be great in musical theater but has one-sided beef with the drama director

has absolute perfect pitch

should be good in close, tight harmonies but is unfortunately allergic to blending

Zhou:

accompanist

classically trained

never participated in ensemble performing arts before the choir director camped outside his practice room and begged until he agreed to help them

only attends their last 2 weeks of rehearsals before a concert

also does keys for orchestra

featured in student showcase

rhapsody in blue

world championship sight-reader 

savior of people who procrastinated on getting an accompanist for their recital everywhere

single-handedly holding up the audition economy like atlas with the world on his shoulders

can’t play from a lead sheet though

[bonesandthebees]

You know it’s a good day when you wake up to a new Bee fic. And it looks to be a solid dose of middle-child Wilbur. So tinfoil summer. I love the title. It instantly made me think of tinfoil hats, which then made me think of aliens. So it fits the fic perfectly.

I’m currently still questioning whether Techno and Tommy have any self-preservation skills in this. Like they find a stranger in the desert and they just take him home. They don’t even wake up their dad. And he sleeps in the same room as Techno. At least there’s some preservation in not putting him in Tommy’s room. And Techno does threaten him. And both of them seem to be aware he could be dangerous.

But still, not a good idea. Sure he seems to have no memories and looks younger than Techno and lanky and hardly dangerous. (and it’s Wilbur, he tends to be quite passive). So it will be fine, but I do hope they get scolded in the morning.

That being said, to us it’s very obvious that Wilbur is an alien, even if he doesn’t seem to realise this himself. He wakes up in a crater (I’m assuming of his own making via crashlanding, I mean Tommy and Techno heard the explosion). He has no memory, but he does seem to know human things. His voice sounds off and the air seems wrong. He has no idea where he is or what his name is. (did he steal a body?)

Also, I am in love with this Tommy already. He’s such a little shit. Who decides to name the stranger you picked up in the middle of the desert at 1 am? Why would you put the idea of killing your brother into his head? Why are they stargazing in the desert in the middle of the night unsupervised? (that would be a killer view though).

Anyway, I look forward to Phil having a mental breakdown in the morning. And we’ll see if they end up taking him to the cops. Gotta love the anarchist tendencies pulling through.

-🌲

you can thank eli for the title!! technically they didn't come up with tinfoil summer, but they were helping me brainstorm and came up with a list of potential titles for me to use, and one of them had 'tinfoil' in the name and I immediately knew I wanted to use that. so then I came up with tinfoil summer exactly because of what you said with tinfoil hats. I just thought it was really fun

techno and tommy are so funny but so stupid at the same time in this. techno's anarchist tendencies and his hatred of police really overrode the self-preservation instincts there, and tommy's 13 so, he's gonna follow along and think this is a great idea

tbf though wilbur is a lanky beanpole guy and techno knows he could definitely take him in a fight. also, he looks like he's on the edge of a panic attack the entire night, so he's not very threatening overall.

poor wilbur has no clue what's going on though :(

I love this version of tommy. idk what I was on when I started writing this but he's such a shithead I'm having the time of my life with his dialogue. peak stupid 13 year old. it's like wilbur's a stray dog he and techno found and he's so excited to bring him home. tommy you can't just name a person-

I mean the stargazing thing isn't that big of a deal. techno's, like, 19 in this and they live in a rather small desert town so they can go out to stargaze on their own and be fine. they've done it plenty of times before as a family so phil wasn't worried about them going off on their own to do it.

oh there's gonna be more anarchist tendencies i promise

so glad you're enjoying so far!!

[batrachised]

What are your favorite non-LM Montgomery stories/fandoms (if you feel like sharing)?

This question sent me wandering down a memory lane! It's actually rare for me to participate in fandoms online, although I'll gobble up funny tumblr posts and fics if a particular story latches onto my brain--star wars is really the only other one I'm active, even if that is primarily just writing fic. I think the only other fandoms I've ever gotten really into are Star Wars and Merlin. Between those two, Merlin definitely is the favorite although Star Wars is probably my favorite story. Sorry to the Star Wars fandom, but there's this weird sense of entitlement I've observed (that's present in any fandom to a degree tbf) about how everyone should interpret the characters op's way or they're basic, and that x opinion is not only bad, it's also immoral. Given how big the fandom is and how there usually isn't one dominant opinion but rather factions, the resulting (and usually hypocritical) squabbling disinterests me. I don't want to feel like I have to have a 'star wars political party' to engage with other blogs haha ("oh i'm dni about this ship but pro jedi" etc etc), especially as I'm the sort of person who will explore different interpretations for fun. That's partly why I have loved my LMM peeps so much, because even where there's disagreement, it's usually civil and more importantly, fun :D

anyhow, now that I've gone completely off track haha and told you about my NONfavorite fandoms, I'll sheepishly actually answer your question. I really loved Merlin when I watched it, because I love me some non-gritty fantasy with a sense of humor and a "chosen one" storyline. I have spent many a glorious hour reading fic where Merlin reveals his magic (ah! the catharsis!) and will probably spend many more. In a similar ilk, I've always had a soft spot for Spider-Man in my heart, specifically the older and crankier teacher Peter Parker version from the comics because he's the Ideal. Both of these are further back on the memory lane (more of high school batrachised than Charlotte lucas period of my life batrachised), but they are still near and dear in my heart.

Now in terms of my favorite stories, for THIS question I had to pull out that bad boy, the bulleted list!! (😱) I generally prefer children's fiction to YA nowadays because I like stories that have something to say, and while there are certainly YA books that fill that gap (I'm about to list several! and btw i'd definitely include THG in that), the expectations for children's novels are such that there is usually a "moral," while a good chunk of YA seems to be more "hot people kissing" and a lot of adult fiction is just dreary to me. I don't really participate in the fandoms for any of these below because first of all, they don't exist lmao, but also I didn't feel the need to change or add anything to the story.

Ella Enchanted. I love Gail Carson Levine's fairytales, and Ella is a refreshing and unique idea. When I say I love fantasy stories, what I really mean is that I love Ella Enchanted. I love how Char and her are friends first, and the scene at the end where she [censored for spoilers] and so gets her happily ever after still influences my writing today.

A Monster Calls. Weeping, on the floor, every time I read it it destroys me. I love its gentleness towards grief, and I love its brutal honesty. I also love its recognition of the power of a story. Sometimes I see (and say myself!) "It's just a story," but stories are powerful and should be treated as such. They aren't worth more than people, but they can teach you much people are worth.

Strange the Dreamer. This novel was gorgeously well-written, and its main character is an absent minded librarian who goes on an adventure--how could anyone resist! I remember recommending it to someone and they stayed up very late to finish it haha, they couldn't put it down. It's too wonderful.

Frog and Toad. Yes, they're picture books, And what about it !!? These picture books are cozy and well-written and have more to say than many a long novel I've read. Plus my blog name and brand require inclusion of a toad related bullet.

The Power and the Glory: I just wrote a post about this one, but anything by Graham Greene always makes me stare at the wall afterwards questioning my life. Funnily enough, this is dreary like the other adult fiction I dismissed, but although it's a hopeless situation with hopeless characters, Graham Greene's writing is strong enough this to have become one of my favorite books. Normally after I read fiction like that, I just feel depressed. This book, while dreary, was thought provoking.

A Canticle for Leibowitz. A post apocalyptic novel...that's not about fighting zombies or a book version of an action movie, but about monks. I know that's a complete reduction of the plot, but the idea of a post-nuclear world from the perspective of monks was such a unique idea, it grabbed my brain and didn't let go.

A Wizard's Guide to Defensive Baking. I love all of Ursula Vernon's work for her sense of humor. They're always very well written and I nod along to myself at different points thinking "correct," as the narrator discusses how true love is spending time debating your favorite type of cheese, or how baking so wonderful because you put in all that effort and have chocolate chip cookies at the end to show for it.

Holes. This book not only ties every plot thread together satisfactorily, it does it with a bow, it's that well done. This was my favorite book as a child and has stood the test of time because it's still one of my favorite books as an adult.

Up a Road Slowly. Of all the books on this list, this is the most LMM similar. It definitely is sexist, I'll warn, but the characterization can be incredible. The uncle stays with me as a remarkably complex but well written character.

Heart's Blood. The best Beauty and the Beast version, full stop, thank u very much !! In general Juliet Marillier is one of my favorite fantasy authors.

Calvin and Hobbes. there's really nothing to say here other than it's perfect haha.

A Deadly Education. A take on the magical school--that's dark and intriguing. What if Hogwarts was trying to kill you? i never got into harry potter myself because I read the books when I was slightly too old for them, so this was one of the first "magical school" books I read that captivated my imagination.

James Herriot. I love the old tv show (haven't seen the new one), but i love the books more. Siegfried and Tristan are hilarious, and James Herriot is similar to LMM in that he takes a simple and ordinary setting and bestows it with magic through his writing.

Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith novelization. "Puh-lease," you might be thinking, a movie novelization? Listen to me. Listen. I went through a period in my life where I'd casually read movie novelizations for the fun extra scraps of details. Normally, I'd idly flip my way through and be like eh that was okay, it's a novelization so whatever. I picked this up, and was left being like like what the actual fuck did I just read. This novel is incredible. It's so good that it changed my tepid feelings on the movie and prequels to "ROTS is now one of my favorite stories." I finished that book thinking "where was this movie??" I don't know what Matthew Stover was on when he wrote this, but it singlehandedly redeemed the prequels for me.

Other non book ones: i love the LOTR movies (and books but I don't reread them often), the narnia movies, Stand by Me, the secret life of walter mitty, the prince of egypt, greta gerwig's little women (sobbing. on the floor.). and v for vendetta. I also love New Girl because Nick Miller. In general, same with books, my favorite movies tend to demonstrate a distinct moral imagination and grit rather than just focusing on the journey of a character's emotional health. (ergo, I find prince of egypt much more interesting than turning red, although turning red was a good movie!)

There's also Dear Enemy from Jean Webster (aka the author of daddy long legs) bc her work is also similar to LMM, buuuut it literally and explicitly supports eugenics (a character will occasionally and casually say "we need to let those irish die for the good of society") sooo if you choose to read, know that that's in there depending on your comfort level with gross historical period conventions. (the goodreads reviews are kind of funny because people are like well I liked the story but, um,)

thank you for this ask and your patience with my meandering response!! it was a lot of fun to think of "hmm, what have I stayed up to 3AM reading fanfic for in the past," and you're tempting me to revisit some of these stories :D

[minmin-pal]

im just gonna nab that "dead man's questions" and stick it in between watching part 4 and 5, kinda gives me vibes of like spy secrecy type stuff lol and ngl i was about to search it up automatically but i'm glad i refrained from it now. so the plot follows a character whose passed away? is it some type of flashback or maybe an 'afterlife/ghost' adventure? i don't know which or if either are right so i'm just pulling stuff outta my guessing hat lol

i might just have to accept this inevitable heartbreak either way tbh, just watching characters go on an adventure, have fun, develop and just generally live makes it very hard not to get attached though ig that just comes with the viewing experience. the 'waiting for them to bring the person back' bit is so real though, ngl i always end up forwarding and end up ruining a series for me because "when is this character getting brought back???", to the point i end up not paying attention to the rest of the series lol(/lh) though i'll make sure to not do that when watching jjba :D W series fr

and oh! you've watched naruto? you said the 'original naruto' so i'm gonna go out on a leg and assume you didn't watch Shipudden?(/genq/nf) could I ask what were your thoughts on the story (however far you got into it?) maybe like favorite/disliked characters? parts of the plot you liked and didn't, did you have any critics of the series (both manga and anime, assuming you read the manga too)? (/lh) any opinions on the legendary Sannin? generally, just your thoughts on it i suppose

and oh yeah fair fair, the intro bit i brought up since i kinda tiptoed around it when i was searching up watch guides and didn't want watch anything that might've spoiled anythin lol (may have been too careful for no reason lmao) the intro was just the first clip i saw of the actual 3d bits (i'm in the 'not know' side whether that style/model was consistent with the actual 3d used in the show tho) but wait they animated the powers n stuff to be 3d?? that's actually super cool wha (/gen)

took me a while to understand that 'death 13' was the name of the episode, and ohh it never occurred to me about the 'copyright issues' bit though i guess it's the same reason why people will always use names like '"barbucks" for a shop in their story whose icon looks awfully like Starbucks lol. i usually watch my anime subbed, though which would you suggest for this one? do you usually watch in subbed or dubbed? but eh yeah, might not matter much but still ty for the heads up! (/gen)

no but truee, the foundation parts make the lead up to the big punchy monster powers bit even more satisfying though :( and jonathan, yeah yeah! i've seen very small smidges of him here and there, i briefly consulted the wiki page of his because i wanted to find a clip of his voice without spoilers and omg he sounds so cool! :D i didn't scroll down any further down the wiki though, there weren't any "spoilers ahead!" warnings but i didn't wanna take any chances :')

oh yeah, sxf is actually a pretty good example of a 'polished' anime artstyle similar to other modern animes tbf, the sharp difference when i try to compare the two in my head made me snort a bit ngl (/lh) the style and story (from what i've seen of jjba and sxf so far at least) are so stark in contrast but they're both so good too (/gen)

twt has already shoved in my face that apparently, eren dies for mikasa or something? i'm not in the know of all the details but the shock factor is definitely eh- minimized now i suppose lol, and oh a tier list might be a fun idea if your up for it! how do you manage to keep track of the ones you've read/watched? or is it just a 'welp i'm relying on my memory for this' type thing? (/hj/lh) sxf really carrying both jjba (with no one being safe lol) and aot in terms of fluff, i feel as though i'm jinxing myself and that the ending might not be happy either but i;m crossing my fingers it is lol, and yea dw abt getting off topic, it's fun to read tangents (is that how you use the word)

mangakas favorite drink are the tears of their fans :') (/j) but props to you for managing to get the titan lore, i've seen a lot of people say it just confused the heck out of them and some said they dropped it so i hope you were able to enjoy it :D (both the series and the 'head-ache inducing' lore /hj/lh) 

and yay no problem! i'll admit when i read your description of it, i tried to do the same actions? like laughing but not making any sound, i definitely looked very goofy while doing it but i remembered the term 'croak/croaking' so it was a fruitful endeavor :D (/j/lh) i apologize for the tmi ;')

 "Chainsaw Man is a character-driven story that manages to conclude itself in 97 chapters, and its due to the author focusing on the main characters and its themes," i didn't think it could be explained so simply in word form but that actually does make sense. "All the battle shounen stuff is just being used a medium to tell the actual story, it's not the story itself." just this description alone summarizes it well i'm assuming and now that i think about it, really makes csm stand out tbh. Almost all anime i can name off the top of my head (action/battle genre ofc) really does focus on "different states and nations all preparing to fight one another for [ cue overarching plot point ]." Character development and personal introspection don't tend to be the top priority, well aside from the 'shonen mc moments' such as ya know- tanjiro, izuku, etc.? (/lh) or from what i can gather at least lol

but honestly, i didn't know csm concluded at 97 chapters! the fact the author was able to just- start it, do what he wanted to do and end it as planned (or at least i'm assuming? i haven't seen any articles with the clickbait tagline of "csm creator dislikes/isn't happy about [ ... ]!") it got pretty popular too so that's awesome to hear, and yea true actually, i can see you and other people like denji and the fact that both the "Mineta Minoru is Expelled from U.A. High School/Shinsou Hitoshi Replaces Mineta Minoru" tags on ao3 collectively have over 5.8k fics says enough lol 

spy was definitely a very wholesome show and it's just so, so nice to watch the family dynamic form and grow<3 dunno why but i liked how they were able to incorporate bits of yor and loid's profession into their parenting styles what with yor helping to cause the iconic damian scene and loid with attempting to sneak in to change anya's grade lol, but oh! what's your thoughts on franky? ngl i kinda love all the goofy stuff he pulls and gets twilight to do lol, but yeah tbh yuri's bit of being secret police and his scenes with anya are some of the only highlights of his char i remember when watching ;; (/lh) obsessive brother still kinda shocks me with how it's pretty prevalent as a trope tbh but also what's your thoughts on bond? also what was your favorite and maybe least liked episode or mayb chapter of sxf? 

it's been a bit since i found the site but i can binge all the chaps now so heads up an ask abt that in a few hours :D (/lh/gen) your so right about that thoo, having characters that could just be irrevocably bad people can be done but managing to make them appealing/getting the readers to feel for them is such a sign of being a good writer, but also yeah managing to cause your readers pain thru them is to be applauded too lol (mangaka's really do enjoy their reader's pain /j/lh) 

how have all the scenes you've shown be so pretty, my brain would assume it's just specific detailed scenes but i have the very sneaking suspicion that the whole manga is styled like this and i'm very much looking forward to it,  even if i covered her facial expression her hair swaying and clothing ripples(is that what u call it) somehow portrays emotion so well, how even? (/lh/pos)

i was confused on who 'nameless white-haired guy' was until i read the next sentence and i just went "ah" lol, and oh kinda sucks he got gassed too much but damn that personality is just yikes lol (from what i've seen of the one scene ofc) and oh there'a dif other guy? in about 30 minutes i'll see this hoodie dude so i'll end up finding out, i know he won't be 'as bad' but i'm looking forward to seeing how bad? uhm, basically looking forward to the chapter, hope that made sense or the sentiment at least got across lol, and yea no worries i'm reading your response at the same time so there might be dead ends/random tangents in mine that i didn't notice so- sorry about that :') 

And ah yea that makes sense, I'd actually be pretty surprised if you were able to remember specific little details but glad to hear you enjoyed it :D the analogy of 'cramming before a test' hit me on a personal level lol (/hj) and oh, was nijimiya the girl mc? she really does seem like a sweetheart and help I never knew she had a younger sister, that's super cool! And yeah! The dude's character development was nice to watch too but alas ofc, tears lol

I remember reading 'Kichikujima (Freak Island)' quite a while ago, I remember it's pretty gorey though I don't know if it qualified as phycological horror? Don't remember too many details so I may be wrong, but oh yeah! I don't know for sure if you were reffering to these types but I kind of made some terms for it lol, idk they're pretty simple labels

Jumpscare Horror - self explanatory, there's a lot of jumpscares and "dun dun dunn" type music/scenes right before the jumpscare.

Gore Horror - I assume this is where kichikujima falls into? Typically, zombie and slasher movies fall into this one lol

Phycological Horror - what you just described :D and ngl ig the name for this one is self explanatory enough lol

I haven't met many people that actually enjoy phycological horror, what's oyasumi punpun if you don't mind me asking? I'm mildly familiar with junji ito's works, i only ever watched vids that dubbed over it tbh but is uzumaki the swirly one? Lackluster description ;; but I'm assuming that's the one, I also heard there was an anime about junji ito's work(s)? Have you seen it? If ya did, what were your thoughts on it? Ohh have you already watched neon genesis? I don't see many people talking about that anymore, what'd you think of it? Seeing your summary of your taste for manga/anime/etc., have you heard of dororo? I only ever watched the anime so I'm not sure whether you'd enjoy it or not, but it's one of the things that come to mind when I think of things that are 'depressing at their core' (/lh)

Figured they'd be under the isekai category tbh, the dif labels just confused me for a bit lol and yeah makes sense it'd depend on the story itself, blue lock is that one popular sports anime recently isn't it? Tbf it's been a hot minute since shield hero gained much media attention as it did before so I don't imagine much talk about it could've been going around lol

Very valid reasoning ngl TT always a genuine whiplash whenever you compare the male and female character designs, the 'probably do not see people of the preferred sex at all' comment both made me cackle and makes a lot of sense lol, the manga started at 1997 and since it's a 'weekly title', technically a chapter comes out every week, I assume that doesn't leave much time for socialization? I dunno but doing this for close to 3 decades, you'd think some actual body diversity or dif styling would be developed as the story progressed but- how did it seriously evolve backwards? This is biologically impossible??(/hj/lh)

I remember a review video I watched citing the author's response as basically saying the target demographic is teen boys anyways? I need to find the video but I'm definitely sure that was the gist of the first bit of his response, it's as if his made unique and customized molds for all of the male characters while using the singular body mold fkr every single one of the female characters ;; the fact he prolly just chooses not to is def a massive let down tbh :')

While scrolling down, my eyes instantly went to the pic so I went "Miles :D!" then woah second pic jumpscared me real bad lol, when you said you had an example in mind I didn't think it'd be such a good example yikes, the longer I look at the artwork the more I understand your point, it's making- a lot of sense, the "you can tell a lot about someone by the way they draw" part is true tbh, this whole bit is just giving me the icks ;;

But ahh, I'll be reading the killer in love manga now :D also very sorry for answering so late, I know it isn't compulsory or anything but really just have my sincerest apologies ;; /gen/pos

And yay alright, I'll try to switch it up sometime for variety lol, minjae, d'you have any that you prefer or prefer not to use?

I watched the outro as it's own clip and I swear the meme was scratching my brain since it seemed so familiar, I'm questioning how'd it even turn into that meme lol, did it take you a while to find out?

(may contain some grammar/spelling errors, srry abt that)

HI!!! :grin: aot spoilers and..... just walls of text under the cut i didnt answer some stuff since there really wasnt anything for me to add of worth-- i read everything though dw

you should read deadmans questions right after thus spoke rohan kishibe (which i forgot to mention is technically a prequel- i shouldve said that.. u watch it after tho cuz its only rlly fun if youve watched rohan throughout part 4 already) i think- (so between 4 and 5 as you said) i cant really... tell you without sorta ruining it so u just have to wait and see. i can say its like.. not the same person he was when she was alive (im messin up their prns on purpose. for extra concealing) and theyre kinda like trying to become happy by doing.. assasinations.. :grin:

my one piece of character death-related advice is to not expect their return in this series. like once theyre dead theyre dead basically would advise to not forward aswell- going backwards fine :grin:

yes ive watched the first naruto it didnt end on a bad note or anything, and i started shippuden and he was suddenly like fucking 16 so i put it on the backburner (for whats been... 4 years now.. i dont think ill get to it ever honestly naruto was fire though. when he would transform into that.. posessed fox form i ALWAYS had to rewind and watch the scene again. idk if its top 3 anime :grimacing: like people say but its not a bad show either (i watched it instead of reading it cuz it was Free) for characters i LOVED naruto. ofc i did hes the mc but like hes such a cool kid honestly. the kinda kid everyones friends with in primary school (apart from in show). the entire main gang was great but naruto and kakashi were my top 2 .. and gaara now that i remember him i liked him more than naruto when i watched it tbh-- he was just so angry and emo and fine ive matured past the age of calling fictional characters attractive but when i was 11 i was in love with him honestly heavily disliked sasuke. which is ironic cuz i hated him for the reason i loved gaara he was so angry and emo all the time-- but he hurt naruto with his edginess (technically gaara did too but i excuse it.) also he was just being a bit of a asshole. like anime rival esque asshole but an asshole nontheless this is getting long so i'll get to the show itself honestly. because its been so long i cant remember what i really disliked the stuff that i can remember are just dumb stuff that all older animes do i guess all the "sexy-jutsu" stuff were kinda off-putting plus jiraiya as a whole. i loved him but damn he was WEIRD i had to google what the sannin were cuz i genuinely forgot-- but i think theyre cool jiraiya is a bit icky, the blonde one (forgot her name) was pretty funny- i liked her dynamic with sakura and orochimaru i think his name was; was so cool. his entire look influenced who i am today i owe it all to him /hj

death 13 is both the episode name and the ability name of the person in that episode and- id wholeheartedly recommend subbed for jjba a LOT of the jokes only work cuz its japanese, aswell as the emotions in scenes personally i dont like dubs since i find that its usually more "colorful" in its original form (for that reason i generally cannot watch korean dubs of animes.. they just throw me off ever-so-slightly

jonathan looks better in the anime than the manga to me, but this is mainly because i dont really like anime characters with muscles as big as. uh.

the hercules-corona borealis great wall :grin: and in the anime they werent as ginourmous its a REALLY good thing arakis art style did not stay the same for the entire series honestly picturing the later characters drawn the way the first parts were drawn is honestly whiplash-inducing

(NOT AN OFFICIAL DESIGN. PART 5 CHARACTER IN PART 1 STYLE)

you really cant compare the jojo artstyle with sxf (probably because of all the muscles + how "harsh" jojo's shading is, and the personality in both styles)

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this is the best thing i could find ^ and honestly it looks cool as hell- the artist is really talented but with the art style i just cant envision it would be as lighthearted as sxf is it carries its own vibe to it

if youve already heard that eren dies it wont pack as hard of a punch (the punch being that THE main character died) but it will still tug on your heartstrings, if you dont know the specifics. i wont say its for mikasa, but more for everyone really eren. is honestly a result of knowing too much thats what i love about aot really.. theres no bad guys other than the big man eating monsters, but even those monsters arent truly bad everyones doing what they have to do, and thats most evident in eren once you sit down and absorb the lore its gutwrenching for remembering what i watched... i honestly have no way of tracking it. theres been a good few times i watched a show, and then realized id finished it already i probably shouldve done that, but theres no point to it now so i just use memory (which honestly shows if a show is good or not-- theres a lot of shows i immediately think of despite having watched them 3 years ago/ ex: death note, erased, jjba, and school live) (and yes thats the correct way to use the way tangents)

thats whats great about csm its not just ur average battle shounen, and its battling is second to its characters whenever i see debates abut goku vs naruto and such its just like the main thing anyone got from the series was the fights (which is fully valid) but like.. there usually isnt much character depth this is usually combatted by making the characters one character trait- something that csm flips over idk what im on about. its 11 pm and i havent slept in 2 days im so sorry if this comes off weirdly written

csm was a really short read and im so happy about that since as you said, fujimoto did what he wanted, finished, and was satisfied with it hes also working on csm part 2- which is not from denjis pov it has a whole different protagonist ive heard, and takes place somewhere else i wont be reading it, since i dont want to start anything i cant finish, but i do push you to once youve finished jojo/killer in love/ other things you feel like reading

it is really nice that yor/loidś work influenced the way they parent (esp with how yor tried to teach anya to defend herself from bullies) franky was a fun character- i liked his disguises he got from loid

bnd is cute i dont really have anything to say about him.. the whole looking into the future thing is cool though my favorite chapter has to be the one where loid is convinced yor is upset with him so he takes her to a bunch of different places.. but she was just in pain after a mission bad explanation but you get the memo i hope

i wouldnt say ALL scenes are the exact same quality as everything ive been showing, but everything is generally *really* pretty

^that was a generally regular scene, so thats just how the art is as a default its really beautiful (also that guy with white hair is the arata i mentioned-- he isnt bad in comparison to all the other ¨bad" characters.. hes just sorta a prick)

i honestly,,,.... shouldnt have said hoodie guy isnt as bad hes really bad but morally speaking white hair guy is even worse so he isnt as bad, but he isnt tame either, esp later on all your points are getting across just fine btw :grin:

i havent read kichijuma before, but i searched it up and it honestly looks really cool like really cool it has 24 volumes from what i read though so i dont think ill check it out

of the three you mentioned, i dont like jumpscare horror its just lazy same with gore horror if thats all there is to it i dont really enjoy horror mangas/animes much in general minus a select few, but for games im all for them (chillaś art's stuff is great) people i think don't like psychological horror because its more of a thing that gets to you (?) in contrast to with jumpscares or something, that it hits you and youre scared and thats sorta that you dont really shriek in fear over psychological horror, which is what some people look for in horror (yes uzumaki is the swirly one) oyasumi punpun,... is... about punpun and him traversing life (him and his family are drawn as birds. everyone else is drawn normally. he is human) i would usher you to check it out yourself :thumbsup:

also- i started dororo, but i never finished it i probably should tonight since i cant sleep ill tell you how i feel about it if i get to it (no promises though)

i get the one piece demographic is manga loving teenage boys but i guess its just dissapointing that he just... chooses not to put effort into his female characters

im so sorry :sob: i saw it on twitter afterwards and i immediately remembered what id said before it was the best example ever (and have fun with killer in love tell me all about how you felt about it :pray: )

i dont rlly mind any variation whatever u feel like

last but not least when i heard the outro music it took like 3 seconds for me to realize what it was afterwards my world was just flipped by its head (the typos are fien i made evern mroe) (and sorry this took me a minute i kept responding then drafting it then editing then drafting it again)

[tartrazeen]

I'm obseeeeeeesseeeeed with this 😍

Just found this post about virtues and excess and deficiencies and went like "THAT'S THE MYSTIC KNIGHTS THING, THAT'S THE SHOW"

Like it went right to my head in seconds

Courage is the first thing on that list, and it immediately taps into what I was saying about Rohan being tested for courage, being the 'brave one', but uhhhh... kinda being bad at bravery...? But it makes so much more sense to see both ends of the scale this way: rashness (literally what Deirdre calls him out for) and cowardice (which is constantly getting to him even when there isn't a curse. He runs from so much - "i want to know my destiny! Nooo why am i Draganta" "i want to know my family! Nooo my mom's mean" "i want to be a knight! Nooo i'm letting everyone down, time to run awaaay"). It's like Fin Varra was testing him to see if he was even capable of threading the needle, not necessarily capable of staying at that sweet spot.

Loyalty's in the longer list I found. I love that the excess is 'conformity', because some of the few times we've seen Ivar be wrong is because he encourages everybody to respect traditions. We don't see 'disloyalty' too often from him, but that is his major character flaw: he's always picking the short-term plans to get the chalice over the slow-and-steady plans. Tbf, the one time he did break completely off to do his own thing, he got the chalice in one try. But it's not like the show let that go unpunished, so yeah, it still falls onto this spertrum of nuance. :3

Humily for Garrett is pretty obvious. The thing we don't see is the deficiency of it: he wasn't on the show long enough to have an arc about spineless and meek. I'd like to think it'd be when someone 'better' than Garrett comes along - like his dad or a sibling or something. It would've been great to see him go from bragging to instantly shutting up, and I'd especially love to see how everyone bonds around getting Garrett to believe in himself no matter what his family thinks.

The last two were harder. 🤔

Angus had 'honesty', and while I'm happy to sub in "Truthfulness," I don't entirely agree with it...? The excess of that is (according to the list) being indiscreet and imprudent. Okay, fair for imprudence - he himself calls attention to how often he blurts out the wrong thing. They've all had their turns at cutting him off. Indiscreet, though... 🤔 It's not like these all need to apply - this an entirely random, separate list - but I'm not sure I saw indiscretion being too prominent in him. If anything, he was always too discreet. And that's why I agree with the deficiency in him more: it's "deceit" and "boastfulness" (he talks a lot of shit he knows he can't back up). "False modesty," though - ehhhhh... I didn't see him doing that a lot. Technically, he tried buttering Cathbad up to help him with getting his armour, but that falls under 'flattery' more than 'humblebrag'. We'll just cross that and 'discreet' off his list. 😌

Deirdre was definitely the hardest. Her noble trait was selflessness, and the closet I could find for that was 'Generosity'. But her arcs were never about being stingy or wasteful. What seems to match her better is 'Fair'. She absolutely overdoes it and pulls rank to be all self-righteous with her royalty. And she's judgy, and she can pick fights with the others real quick. 😝 On the other side of that is just 'unfair'. She does technically struggle with having the wisdom to make the right decision as a leader, and when she was ruling for a few days, she did make a lot of unfair calls. So I think this suits her, even there's a bit of massaging being done to these terms.

😋 I just like this. It gives me an easy set of anchors for everybody, and it especially gives a fast look at some parallel flaws we know they have (like perfectionism for Deirdre, short-temperedness for Angus, naivete for Rohan, stuffiness for Ivar, and derisiveness for Garrett). Easy prompts for head canons 🥳

[superconductivebean]

#640: another wright hc post

saw yet another post with quite a list of questions!^^ some i answered before brainrot leeway i thought. need a break i said. here we go again! tagging the mc hc enjoyer @boxdstars

have they / would they dye their hair?

Wright enjoys bright colours but would rather fancy herself a new dress than to do anything with hair dyes. Maintaining the colour. not to mention anything about applying it, sounds off-putting to her; don't forget, she is an experienced muggle-way-of-doing-things doer. Something like this will fret her for a moment or two because she'd meticulously remember how-to and will resort to reading on the topic.

Until somebody tells her she's a dumdum, there is a spell for that.

do they maintain eye contact when talking?

Some days Wright forget eye contact is maintained a little differently, staring people right in their eyes unblinkingly likely would scare them off or have a wrong impression on them.

what is their tell for lying?

Wright is a terrible liar. She prefers to tell the truth, or half-truth, but to take her words as truth is up to whoever she is confessing or answering to.

Sharp had fun times deciding, if she was pulling his leg or genuinely trying to explain what was it about #AnythingFig she was meddled in during her fifth year.

do they have an accent?

A surprisingly tough question.

You see, before England, she used to speak in Dutch and Icelandic/Faroese, as these were the languages her family used to speak into. She was taught English, however, but it wasn't easy to integrate into a society where different part of the country basically speak their own little version of English. Her mother, perfectly aware of this, spent years teaching her how to sound convenient.

Although, after her sixth year, Wright's gained accent will loosen up a bit and she'll begin speaking like she would have used to.

A tiny little self-indulgent part it is, because that's what I'm doing irl, and tbf, my English is very phonetic, too. postAlveolar [r] is such a cool sound, I crrrrrave.

what languages do they speak?

English and Dutch, catches bits of German and if refreshed her memory, will eventually catch up with her father's mother tongues; knows a couple of swear Russian words. Блядство and БЛЯДЬ are her favourite spells.

She knows KURWA, too. Ja pierdole.

what kind of music do they listen to?

She'd enjoy french composers of the era.

In modern!AUs, Wright will sit hooked on italian, german, and icelandic bands like there'd be no tomorrow. Study Together Lofi Girl stream except the music:

describe them in one word. what could happen to make them the opposite?

I'd say, she is whimsical. In a sense, that her magic is this very word.

Wright can approach things matter-of-factly though, if the situation requires her to think for more than a few seconds.

the duality of wright

what is a secret they do not tell anyone?

Wright has many of them but by far the biggest: story reason #?.

Rookwood as a boggart is less damaging to her reputation.

what motto do they live by?

Fight smart, not hard.

how do they feel about jewelry? painted nails?

Wright's a beastmaster.

But Imelda tries. She is almost desperate. She is also a professional Quidditch player and perfectly understands Wright in that regard. BUT SHE LOOKS GORGEOUS EVERY TIME SHE DRESSES UP?

Imelda's crush on her only keeps on growing over the years, don't @ her.

Poppy adores their banter.

what kind of art are they?

Impressionism 100%. Wright would absolutely adore Grimshaw's nocturnal scenes and Aivazovsky marine paintings, enjoy Whistler, too.

what could you do to betray their trust?

Ever justified anything pure-blood families believe in or do on day-to-day basis? Done, she hisses at you.

if you had to choose something to make them go all john wick, who would it be?

She went all john wick in her 5th year.

do they swear? in what language?

СУКАБЛЯДЬ!

are they extraverted or introverted?

Introverted. The kind of it, when people perceive you as reserved.

what is their sleep schedule like

An extreme early bird, 3-4am is her go-to wake up time but. She isn't living alone. The need to accommodate sleep patterns of her girlies renders her half-asleep and half-there around midnight; she'd prefer going to bed at around 10pm and when rarely alone, at 6-8pm. Wake up time therefore shifts from her ideal 3-4am to 4-6am.

Cannot say Poppy and Imelda are night owls. Though, around midnight, they aren't as dead as Wright.

are they the first to hug?

The only one the first to hug for her is Ominis because he can't see her.

With Sharp, it's complicated................

Literally everybody else hugs her first.

how do they smile? do they have dimples?

Teethy. Wide. Foxy? If that's the right word??

what about their teeth -- braces? sharp teeth? dentures? yellow teeth? what about spots?

i mean in hl they all have literally perfect bites and to say something about mc specifically she has a wide long jaws and all her wisdom teeth are literally in perfect positions yes i have checked I ENVY THIS FICTIONAL YOUNG LASS YOU HEAR---

do they talk with their hands?

That's one of the many ways her nerve damage manifests.

Aside from the need to release tension this way, she practise-- Look, IDK many words, can I just say, it's a thing when the brain understands that you see a thing before you but at the same, time doesn't register it or remember its state or condition or colour, basically the brain think it's a t-posing box and concentrate on smth else.

what is their biggest conflict? it doesn't need to be big for everyone else, only for them.

The train wreck of her life.

how do they react to death?

Wright has abandonment issues and she is very empathetic to losses of others.

That being said, she only tolerates the inevitable death of someone's grand and great, everyone else but especially loved ones, don't you dare, or she is already going through Hell and high water.

do they cry? how do they cry -- silent tears, sobbing, a swallow?

DON'T MAKE HER CRY EITHER. Unless you're making her very happy with something; she doesn't control it, don't ask, just hand her a handkerchief.

how do they react when someone else is crying? can they comfort a stranger?

Nobody cries on her watch. She will kick arse, she will help, just please stop.

do they have allergies?

Boom berries.

Actually, a headcratch for Sharp, he'd never seen somebody developing allergies to something used for a cure for allergies.

do they take off their shoes going into a stranger's house?

Absolutely. Even Wright might not know where she'd been before coming in; her occupation makes it all more convenient for her to wear it off and change into something less filthy or dirty or whatever.

do they call strangers by their first name or title?

"Pardon me good sir man" How would she know their first name, well, she always picks the safest route. Sir. Madam. How'd you like to be called, tell her, she'll use it.

how do they show fear? trying to hide it? shaking? etc.

First Sharp taught her how to collect oneself in the face of danger, then couldn't deny, story reason #?.

what is their impact on other characters?

She cancelled hp timeline.

how could any of these change by the end of the story?

Her story doesn't really end because she'll live up to a very old age, as well as everybody else because we're in for a lesbian power fantasy.

Her legacy, though?

Thaaaaaat's gonna be an alternative history fantasy fiction I'm not qualified to write.

:3

[julemmaes]

Robyn

Rowaelin Month, Day Ten

A/N: I'd planned on posting them in order, but you get what you get. Idk when the other prompts will come tbf. I hope soon. Anyway, I managed to write over 6k words today and I'm pretty fucking proud.

This is just fluff over fluff, so yep enjoy!!

Word count: 3,047

Rowan was unbelievably late as he sped through the streets of Orynth.

So late that the school had called not only him, but also the front desk of the place where he worked when he hadn't answered the call on his personal phone. Sorscha, his assistant, had entered his office with an embarrassed smile on her lips, as if she didn't want to tell him that he had forgotten for the umpteenth time to pick up his daughter from school.

Lorcan had joined him, for some strange reason, but Rowan had stopped bothering when it came to his best friend. He'd been trying to figure out how he reasoned for years and had come to the conclusion that there was no logical sense in the actions of the man sitting next to him, who was currently singing at the top of his lungs to one of the songs on the Frozen CD - which much to the chagrin of both of them, had gotten stuck in his car radio months before, forcing them into hours of torture.

He would never deny that the songs were all quite catchy, but after the sixteenth time Rowan had had to listen to Let It Go at maximum volume, his positive opinion of the film had begun to waver.

As they pulled into the school parking lot, Rowan noticed with deep regret that the only cars still there were those of the teachers and school staff.

They both got out of the car, Rowan walking quickly towards the entrance while Lorcan dragged behind him.

He greeted the caretakers sitting at the entrance, who returned a big smile. A smile that grew even wider when his large, imposing friend entered a few moments later. He stopped to talk to the old ladies and Rowan walked down the corridor he knew led to Robyn's classroom.

He could hear muffled voices from inside the teachers' room on the left and the one he knew belonged to Miss Galathynius coming from the right. He looked out over the classroom, spotting the two people sitting at a desk.

As soon as his daughter saw him, her eyes widened and a huge smile flashed across her face.

No words. No "hello, daddy!" or "I missed you!" from the little girl.

Her teacher turned as she leapt out of her chair and ran towards him, hugging his legs and looking up at him. Rowan smiled at her in turn, running a hand over her hair that was shot in every direction.

"Hello, little bird," he murmured to her. The child's smile widened even more if that was possible.

The woman a few feet away from them pulled herself upright, crossing her arms over her chest and offering a sincere smile to the child, who hid behind his thighs.

Rowan was about to tell her that Robyn was shy with everyone like this, ready to defend his daughter's behaviour as he was used to doing in front of every adult, but he was beaten to the punch.

"It's good to see you, Mr Whitethorn," she said, extending a hand. Rowan shook it without hesitation. "Actually, I just wanted to write you a letter regarding Robyn," she continued, never taking her eyes off the little girl. "Nothing serious," she hastened to reassure him when Rowan grimaced, "quite the contrary. Robyn is remarkably good. One of the best in the class, though I shouldn't offer that information so bluntly."

Miss Galathynius winked at him, but he couldn't process what he'd just been told.

"Sorry, could you-"

The little hands clamped around his trousers tightened a fraction more and Rowan looked down, trying to figure out what was bothering his daughter, but then something happened that he hadn't even dared to dream about in recent times.

"You're here!"

The little girl broke off and ran away from him in less than the blink of an eye.

Rowan turned just in time to see Lorcan grab Robyn in mid-air, spinning her around as he brought her to his chest and showered her with kisses. The loud, incessant laughter that erupted from her seemed too much coming from that fragile little body, but he never tired of hearing it.

"Why hello baby!" said Lorcan laughing in turn, starting to tickle her until she begun to rebel and he was forced to let her slide to the floor. Robyn was still laughing at the top of her lungs and nearly fell to the ground as she squealed left and right, letting herself be pushed around by the closest thing to an uncle she had ever had.

When Rowan turned back to the woman, she was wide-eyed and her lips slightly parted as she watched the massive man dressed completely in black and the menacing face turn into a completely different person the second he had seen Robyn.

He chuckled, "I know, it's not every day you get to see a little girl be so comfortable with a brute like that."

Lorcan, who was listening to everything, looked him straight in the eye and without stopping smiling and playing with the little girl, mouthed to him to fuck off.

"Well, yeah. You caught me a little off guard." she confessed, still shocked to hear how Robyn was having a full conversation with Lorcan. They couldn't hear anything of what she was actually saying, but even just the fact she was talking to someone seemed to have Aelin unsettled.

She returned her attention to Rowan and let out a breath that sounded more like a giggle, "I've never heard her laugh before."

He nodded, blushing a little at the teacher's surprised but relieved tone.

"I'm sure the dean warned you about the problem she has," he said in a low voice. He grimaced at her poor choice of words, "I mean, not problem, but the difficulty she finds in interacting with people she doesn't know."

Liar, he told himself. Robyn hadn't spoken to anyone but him and Lorcan since the day Lyria had died. It wasn't a difficulty, but a response to the trauma that prevented her from speaking to anyone who wasn't part of her immediate family.

"I know, I know. We've been looking for solutions together." she informed him. "I give her a white board every morning. Come on, I'll show you." she turned to the desk they were sitting at earlier and raised the magnetic board, on which a few words were scribbled on. "I'll write here what she might need. Yes. No. I need to go to the bathroom. I'm thirsty. I'm hungry." she read, listing the various options. Rowan gaped. "We've only just started going over the alphabet for a second time, so she can't really read or write yet, as I imagine you know, but the little drawings next to each sentence help her."

She continued talking, but he couldn't quite follow.

The woman in front of him - aside from being breathtakingly beautiful - had done as much as she could to help her child with communication.

"Mr. Whitethorn-"

"Rowan. Please, call me Rowan." he said, clearing his throat once he realized how hoarse it sounded to his ears. Lorcan walked up to them at that point, still holding Robyn in his arms and positioned himself next to him, letting their shoulders touch in a comforting way.

"Call me Aelin, then," she smiled at them both. Then she made a small grimace, turning to Rowan, "I wanted to ask if it bothered you, that I sought a solution like that. Maybe I put her in distress, embarrassed her. I'm sorry if I gave you the impression that I wanted to solve this on my own. I really wanted to discuss it with you, with your husband too, to avoid misunderstandings. Maybe we could arrange a meeting."

He was about to tell her that she had given him the exact opposite of annoyance, that he had been more than pleased that she had helped Robyn this way, when her words finally registered.

Lorcan, beside him, had opened his mouth wide and his lips were slowly bending into a mischievous smile.

Rowan furrowed his brow, "I'm sorry, what?"

Aelin's smile seemed to falter. "A meeting? With you? To talk about how to handle the situation," then she shifted her gaze to Lorcan, "You're more than welcome to join as well. I didn't know Robyn had two dads, I apologise for assuming Robyn had a mum and dad. That was very rude of me-"

"I love this," Lorcan whispered, laughing in shock. He turned to Rowan with eyes that sparkled with amusement, "I would definitely be the top."

Rowan looked at him with an expression of complete shock on his face, "What the fuck are you talking about?"

Robyn gasped, opening her eyes wide and bringing a hand to her mouth, pointing then to Rowan's.

"Yeah, sorry, love. I shouldn't have said the bad word." he apologised, giving her a quick kiss on the forehead. He turned back to Miss Galathynius, "I'm sorry to have to disappoint you, but we're not married."

"No need to lie, sweetie. I'm sure Aelin," he gave her a knowing look, "doesn't mind at all about our relationship status."

Aelin nodded, "Well, yes. That doesn't change anything. Mr..." she turned to Lorcan, searching for a name.

"Salvaterre."

"Mr. Salvaterre can still attend. The fact that you are not yet married is no reason why you cannot both be present at the meeting. You don't have to worry, we are a very tolerant school and if anyone bothers you, you can come directly to me."

A sound of sheer glee escaped Lorcan.

Aelin continued, "I mean it. I was pleased to see both of you today. I was also pleased to see Robyn smiling so much." she concluded, looking the little one in the face.

Rowan took a deep breath, bracing himself, "No, I meant, we're not a couple. We're not gay. He's her uncle."

The woman's blonde eyebrows shot up and a second later she turned almost as red as the dress Robyn was wearing as Lorcan shook his head muttering something very much like 'you're no fun', which made Robyn giggle.

"Why did you even get off the car?" he asked him exasperated.

Lorcan shrugged, "Because I missed my little bean, you monster." he replied, clutching Robyn to his chest. The little girl clutched Lorcan's shirt in her chubby little hands and Rowan huffed, shaking his head.

Aelin brought her hands to her face, leaning against the desk behind her. She shook her head, her face still hidden, "Oh, god. I'm so sorry."

Lorcan let out a dry laugh, "Don't worry about it. It was fun while it lasted." then he turned to Rowan again, who was still trying to recover from the idea of being involved in a relationship with his friend, "You're really no fun."

"Yeah, no fun dad." repeated Robyn.

Silence fell over the class. Rowan looked at her with wide eyes and blinked once, twice. Robyn was staring at him with a sweet scowl that mimicked so much that of the man who was still holding her, but Rowan couldn't get over the fact that his daughter had spoken while Aelin was still beside them.

He was about to talk, noticing how Robyn had started squirming in Lorcan's arms, when there was a knock at the door.

They both turned, Aelin peering over Rowan's shoulder, and saw the figure of a petite girl with black hair and eyes standing in the doorway, watching them with her head slightly bent to the side. She had a tag on her t-shirt that was too colourful to belong to someone who didn't work in a school with children, so he guessed she was a teacher herself. Besides, Rowan felt like he'd seen her elsewhere. Probably every day when he picked Robyn up from school, he said to himself.

"I know you're not supposed to eavesdrop but I stopped by earlier and heard you were a couple of dads," she said by way of introduction. "I just wanted to reassure you that the school is an extremely safe place. I'm the one who did most of the interviews with the parents," that's where they had met then, "and one of the questions that is asked is just about the tolerance of the people who will be attending the school."

Aelin watched her, remaining silent the whole time and putting on an amused smile, nodded, "That's what I was telling them. How tolerant the school is. They make such a cute couple, don't you think, Elide?"

Rowan turned to her, arching an eyebrow, silently asking her what she was doing. The woman, as if she could truly understand what he was trying to convey to her, nodded her head towards Lorcan, who Rowan only then noticed was standing weirdly, his eyes fixed on the woman in the doorway.

He grinned, deciding to take his revenge right away. "Oh, yes. Thank you so much for the reassurance," Rowan began to play along as well. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Lorcan turn towards him, dropping Robyn to the floor, who made a disapproving noise at being dumped so suddenly. "We are happy to know that this school is a safe place for our daughter. And for us."

Elide offered him a blinding smile, "Good. I'm happy to hear that you are pleased so far. And I am happy that Aelin is the one who is taking your daughter's class. She's the best one here."

Rowan didn't know her yet, but he knew the thing Elide had just said could only be true.

"Well," she said again, giving them an apologetic smile, "I really must go now, but if you need anything, you can find all my contact details on the website. Have a nice day!"

Aelin and Rowan said their goodbyes, thanking her. Lorcan took a while to recover, but when he realised he was staring into empty space he ran towards the door, almost stepping on little Robyn, who was moved by Aelin.

"We are very much not gay, miss!" he shouted into the hallway. Aelin, now beside him and with a hand on Robyn's shoulder, cackled. With Lorcan's infinite luck, someone walked by just then and gave him a stern look. "Oh, shut up ma'am. I'm an ally. The best ally."

Rowan shook his head as Lorcan launched himself in pursuit of the poor teacher and burst out laughing when he heard him shout, "I'm not homophobic! I'm willing to suck someone's cock if I have to prove it to you!"

Aelin opened her mouth wide before bursting out laughing in turn.

Robyn, seeing both adults so happy, giggled too and Rowan bent down to pick her up. The little girl laid her full head of white-light hair on his shoulder and closed her eyes.

She was tired and Rowan really needed to get her home to sleep.

He glanced at Aelin and reduced his lips to a thin line, "I'm sorry about the commotion, I'll try not to bring him into the building again. Even if it means tying him to the seat."

The soft laugh she gave made something tighten in his chest. He frowned.

Aelin didn't seem to notice the effect she had on him, "Don't worry, Elide is crazy about fools like him. If he says the right things, we might start seeing each other outside of school too."

Rowan nodded, now too caught up in the thought of having to take Robyn home to focus on anything else.

They agreed on when to hold the parent-teacher meeting and then he grabbed Robyn's backpack, walking towards the exit.

He was thoughtless as he reached into his pocket for his keys and balanced everything else - including the girl - on his other arm, but when Robyn's hand brushed his cheek, he looked down and his eyes met their twins. Green against green.

"What is it?"

The little girl's voice never stopped making him smile. Each time was like the first time she had said dada.

"I really like her."

Rowan frowned, "Who?"

"Miss Aelin." she whispered, almost as if she was afraid they might hear her.

He smiled at her, "Yeah? You like her?"

"She's nice to me."

Rowan had to put her down as he opened the door and let her get into the back seats by herself.

"I'm glad she's treating you well, love," he let her know, buckling her in.

He hoped she'd tell him more about her new teacher, but like any kid her age, the topic of conversation couldn't last for more than four lines apiece, "Where's Uncle Lorcan?"

Rowan snorted, "No idea, little bird."

Robyn nodded, "Elide is pretty too."

And as if those words had summoned him, Lorcan appeared beside the car, making them both scream. He entered the car in a heartbeat and turned to his daughter, who was still settling into the seat. "Do you know Miss Lochan?"

But before she could answer him, Rowan had entered the car in turn and smacked the back of his head, which made the Robyn giggle, "You're not using my daughter as your wingman. Now stop it and buckle up."

Lorcan gave him a gentle push, before doing as he was told and for once he was happy he'd convinced him to do something.

Or at least, Rowan thought he had convinced him.

"What if I left you a note to deliver to Miss Lochan, Rob? Would you be up for it?"

Rowan knew, even without looking at her, that she was nodding emphatically.

Keeping his eyes on the road, he murmured, "Could you stop calling my daughter Rob, please? You'll give her an existential crisis."

Lorcan clicked his tongue against his palate, "Rowan, I'm not giving her a damn thing. We live in this new world, okay? Your daughter could be called Simon and still be a beautiful princess. Grow up and educate yourself before you talk shit."

"Aaaah!" shouted Robyn, "Bad word!"

Rowan sighed and shook his head, but still he was smiling.

This was his life. Had been for the past two years.

And he wouldn't change it for the world.

tog tag list (if you wanna be added or removed just dm me or send me an ask)

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[ballorawan740]

SCP Scenarios: When they get scared by the reader (REQUESTED)

Main Masterlist | SCP Scenarios Masterlist | My Works Masterlist | Rules | Request | Socials | My Original Post

Requested by: @_Milla_7849_

SCP 073 (Cain)

I feel like Cain normally wouldn't be scared

Like if you made him watch a horror movie, he might flinch slightly but wouldn't be terrified of it

So when you try to scare him like a prank sort of way, he would flinch a little more than usual but would recover seconds later

Like that one time when he was alone walking down the hallway looking zoned out since he was thinking of something

And you just crept up to him like the sneaky little child you are and jumped onto his back

He did get a load yelp but realised it was you

Luckily for you, Cain didn't give you a lecture like before and actually laughed with you

However, if you were kidnapped or taken hostage or used for an experiment, it would obviously frighten him and he wouldn't forgive himself

So to prevent this, he would keep you within his line of sight at all times

Anyways, as I've mentioned before, Cain would probably also give you a tight hug after your little stunt and unbeknownst to him, the researchers recorded it for a laugh

Cain did give you a lecture but forgave you since you were so young and he couldn't resist those eyes

And the researchers did give you some sweets

SCP 076-2 (Abel)

Now, a warrior like Abel wouldn't be so easily frightened

Especially if it was a child, even more so if it's you since he knows you too well and has personally trained you from the age of 5

Basically, Abel would notice your movement and body language well since you're both stuck together

So you have devices a plan with your scientist friends to try and scare him

And yes, it's working

Because Abel got extremely distracted by Iris

Iris basically got yahooted into this mess and was told to wear a lingerie

Yes, you did scare him by shoving him into Iris

I wouldn't say he got a scare, but more like a surprise

Poor girl she just wanted to sleep

SCP 999 (Tickle Monster) 999 would most likely be scared the easiest out of everyone on this list

Aside from Glass

He's like a close second

Back to 999, you both were just chilling and wandering around the facility aimlessly

Because yall are boring (TBF you're both trapped in this giant mf blop of a building)

Anyways, let's just say that it was Bright and Clef who introduced you to the world of pranks and you guys thought it would be funny to scare our 999 here

Basically, yall decided to play dead and then pretend to turn into zombies with some makeup

Yes, it did work since you've managed to scare the living daylights out of 999

And he was about to have a cardiac arrest (if he even has a biological heart)

And yes, it almost ended in another breach

And 999 did give you a lecture on how to not scare people like that

He does sound like a grandpa though XD

SCP 682 (Hard to Destroy Reptile)

I would say that scaring 682 would be difficult, but I won't since he's already terrified of that rabbit

You, along with the other researchers, thought it'll be fun to pull a prank on 682 in form of a magic trick

It's a classic rabbit in the hat trick and yes, you did pull SCP 524 out of the hat

But, little did your tiny brain know, that rabbit basically eats everything, including itself

So you just watched 524 approaches the already terrified 682 and nibble on his feet

And yes, you and the other researchers laughed hard since he crawled up the wall to get away from the rabbit (I'm now officially adopting 524 as my other pet)

Sadly, 524 didn't stay for long since another doctor needed him for a test with Josie (yes, the cat)

682 basically shouted at you for doing such a thing on him, your dad

But you ignored him anyways since you knew he never meant what he said and he wouldn't be mad at you for long

SCP 049 (Plague Doctor)

Our bird boy here is pretty much neutral when it comes to being scared

Like, he can be quite unfazed by many things, so it's no surprise if you or any other SCPs tried to jump on him

So as part of an experiment, you and your friends had decided that you would try to play dead and see if 049 would be terrified

Well, 049 was somewhat concerned and when you carried on playing dead, he became scared since you weren't so conscious, or so he thought

Since you played dead extremely well for such a young child, he tried to see if he could fix you

And before he could do anything, you jumped up at him like Bonnie from FNAF

Yes, he looked like he jumped out of his skin and was so stunned that he just sat in the corner with his head down for an hour

You all had to check up on him and he said he was 'fine'

He wasn't

049 gave you a lecture about playing dead like that unless there's a dangerous SCP

SCP 035 (Possessive Mask)

Now, since 035 is a mask and is very much a master manipulator and an award-winning actor/actress, you would most likely be able to take on those traits from him

When you were younger, you were eager to learn from 035, who you see as not only your best friend but also an idol, so he taught you everything he could

As you got older, you've gotten better at manipulation and acting, so much so that even 035 couldn't tell if you were just being you from time to time

So one day, you've decided to prank your dad because you were hella bored (like you always are :((( cuz yall never be productive and just sit on your flat bum all day and watch YouTube, Netflix or play games then sleep)

You basically produced a fake body of yourself and wrapped it in a black bag and sent it to 035's cell

Then, you've got one of your researcher buddies to write a note of your passing and that you do love him very much

035 did receive the message and made sure that there was a dead body in the package

He was pretty much convinced that it was you since you were able to disguise the fake body like bone and flesh

Which of course scared him to death because he was about to attack everyone on site

Luckily you got there on time to stop him which freaked him out and yes, you've gotten a lecture about being such a prankster (You got grounded for life but that didn't stop a rebellious child like you)

At least everyone at the facility has gotten a laugh about it for the next 3 months

SCP 105 (Iris)

Pranking Iris wouldn't be hard, but that doesn't mean she's fazed, but not in a sense like 049 who wouldn't get a good scare from some SCPs which could do him harm

Iris is very much a self-aware and open-minded individual who has common sense (unlike you, who don't even move out of your bed or even use your non-existent brain cells)

She's very much like every other person you'll meet on the streets who wouldn't just believe the first thing that she hears since she is very much a rational person

So, if you want to devise a plan to scare her, it'll have to blend in with everything or be quiet out there with realistic effects

You'll have to use your head to think of a good prank to scare her, which you did since you've inherited her intelligence (that's a lie because you don't have any intelligence left in you)

As her child, you have decided to prank her by making her a fake copy of her camera but instead of her being able to control objects within the photo, she would end up destroying it

You gave it to her as a gift and she accepted it with suspicion since you don't normally get her anything and encouraged her to try it (you're such an ungrateful child)

Cain, Dr Glass, Dr Kondraki and a couple of others wanted to see as well, so they stayed and watch

Much to everyone's horror, the illusion camera did exactly how you designed it to and Iris was furious and saddened

Later on, you told her about the prank since you feel bad and she was extremely mad

So instead of grounding or lecturing you, she decided to have revenge

SCP 106 (Old Man)

Now, scaring this old man would be rather interesting because he doesn't seem too fazed by the other, more dangerous and unpredictable, SCPs

But, you can still scare him to a certain degree

I mean, he is an old man after all, so scaring him would be fun

As long as you don't give him a heart attack then it's fine I guess (cuz yall be evil for scaring such an old man)

So, you have decided to scare 106 by giving off little bits of harmless pranks at first so 106 would let his guard down for a moment

Like, giving him a box full of spiders (he's quite disgusted by them just like how he sees your face every time) and popping an air-filled bag (Don't lie, you've all done it and it's hella fun)

Later on, you would gradually move to play with the more dangerous things, such as getting him to look at a picture of 096's face (Probs ugly like yo-)

As time moved on, 106 seemed to be relaxed and expected you to bring him random things and soon realised that there was something off

You didn't show up to him for almost a week and he was ready to get his dad mode on

Luckily, some of the guards caught you with Abel and got 106 involved since they were afraid of causing a massive breach

106 panicked and picked you up, giving you a lecture on how you shouldn't be with other SCPs like Abel

You managed to tell him that you've befriended Abel and he was stunned and gave him the dad glare (you know the one where dads would give to warn others to not hurt their kids right?)

And because it's Abel, he would even make sure to be with you whenever you were with him which made it difficult for you to play with Abel because he might steal you away (Yes I'm looking at you right now kiddo, don't play with Abel)

So in conclusion, if the prank involves you being in a dangerous position, he wouldn't necessarily be scared but would start to panic about your safety

SCP 096 (Shy Guy)

I think 096 would be similar to 106 in a sense but less logical and unfazed

It's more like he would be pretty panicky every time you weren't there with him and his anxiety would act up (like you every time you're preparing for your exams where you didn't even revise)

Like if you were with Safe class SCPs, he would be more relaxed than you being with a Euclid class, but it kinda depends on who it is

If it was Cain then it would be fine, but if you were to be with 173, he would be quite wary at first and would tell you to try and avoid being with that peanut

So if you wanted to scare him, it wouldn't be too hard

All you had to do was to be with another Keter class SCPs and play with them

He would be extremely cautious and terrified if you were with one and knowing this, you've decided that playing with 682 instead of playing with Walter the rabbit (SCP 524 | He's my other pet), you've decided to go up and pet 682

When 096 got a hold on the commission on you being with that lizard, he ran out of his cell, causing a huge containment breach on the way like he's bulletproof, and went yeehaw with 682

All you did was sit there in confusion as they entertained you with some pole dancing

Basically, if you scare 096, he would go from anxious to paranoid to berserk then to we're all going down to hell and back again

Dr Jack bright

This mf right here is unpredictable af

Like in his own body, he would remain unfazed and would even go as far as pranking you back

I mean he still would act all fun and games but since he can possess multiple bodies, the outcome of him being scared would vary which would surprise him too since he wouldn't know

Unless he decided to possess someone he knows well, but he knows better than to do that

Dr Bright would most notably be scared, like everybody else on the list, if you were to put yourself in immediate danger, but since you were just as crazy as your dad, he would most likely go along with it until you deliver your prank

Like, you could be juggling knives while standing on top of 682's head while singing 'Painted Smile' by Madam Macabre (If you haven't heard it, you should, it's amazing)

Also, he would sometimes find you having your back faced towards peanut and still be fine after having your neck being snapped (Yall be like surprise mf)

Anyways, one time Jack had made a promise to you to meet you at a certain place and he was late

So you stormed into his office (like the entitled little nugget you are) and went 'tick-tock mf' to your dad

Well it worked and you showed him your trick with the Keter classes

By causing a containment breach and somehow you managed to bribe the Keter classes to perform with you

Let's just say that just because you've inherited his craziness doesn't mean that you could go as far as doing this prank

Bright was about to drop dead from a heart attack and he banned you from doing such things in the future

Dr Simon Glass

With Simon Glass, you could give him a fright relatively easily

Just because he's a psychologist and can read people rather well, he still would be terrified and paranoid about whatever you were planning on doing

Even if he told you not to

Like that time when you were told to not make toast because you can't cook and you almost burnt the whole facility and Glass stood there and said "I told you so" (he did ask for toast, as in toasted bread, not toasted humans)

Anyways, being the child of Simon Glass meant that you would learn a lot about the human mind and behaviour

He would teach you everything you were curious about and would sometimes ask Diogenes, Light, Kondraki, Cain and Iris to help teach you the things he wouldn't have much knowledge on

And sometimes Clef and Bright would appear and spoil you (not that Glass doesn't, he's just busy and trying to be the best dad he could by being anxious about you being alone in the facility with so many dangerous SCPs)

So this often meant that you, Bright and Clef would pull pranks on each other, usually on Kondraki and Iris

Except for this time, you've decided to pull a prank on your dad, Dr Glass

You've handed him over a realistic model of SCP 058 and he freaked out and called the MTFs

They've checked the model and realised that it was all fake and poor Simon had a heart attack from you

Simon was about to yeet that spider looking thing but it was able to move so he planned to carry you and yeet you both out

He did give you a lecture on doing that stunt and you did shed a few crocodile tears

And yes, Glass gave in and comforted you

He then went to grab Clef and Bright's ears and lectured them about helping you make the prank

Dr Alto Clef

I feel like Clef would be similar to Bright but without the whole process of changing bodies because of some curse

Like Clef wouldn't be all that scared since he's dealt with SCPsbefore and dies an extremely good job at it

So for Clef to be scarred for life, it'll either be an extremely dangerous SCP, he's drunk and/or high, he must care about you a lot and you must've been out of your mind to do something seriously stupid or you're evil enough to piss off a Simon Glass (Or all of the above if you're evil enough)

You would most likely want to take the easier and quicker route out of all the ones mentioned on the list which is to put yourself in an immediate danger

So you had asked Dr Bright for some help and so he did

Moments later, midway through preparing your prank, Clef came to Bright asking if he saw you and he did

However, they heard a familiar scream from down the hallway and they both rushed to your aid and soon realised that it's you

You were about to get eaten by 939 and they had to signal for the MTFs to help (Because you mfs didn't ask me for permission when you wanted to pet 939 D:<)

Clef gave you a big lecture and comforted you after he cooled down

Bright on the other hand wasn't so lucky as Clef wanted to murder him (But in his defence, you didn't tell Bright how dangerous the prank was cuz yall are as stubborn as a rock)

Dr Benjamin Kondraki

Kondraki would be pretty much average when it comes to being scared but with a little more logical since he works with the Foundation

He's that type of dad who would let you go to sleepovers every now and again as long as they weren't of the opposite gender (Unless yall are Bi, Gay, Lesbian, Pan, Alien, Basketball etc then he's screwed)

We support BLM and LGBTQ+ in this community and anyone who says otherwise must leave now

Heck, even our friends here, especially Kondraki, Glass, Bright, 999, Cain, Iris and Josie (SCP 529, my new pet) supports them

Anyways, back to the main plot

Depending on what age you're at and whether you were planning to prank him with the Foundation staff or SCPs will lead to a different outcome

Like if you told him you were dating someone he would've died right there and then

No dating until you're 50

Anyhow, you've decided that it'll be funny to scare your dad with Clef and Bright by getting his Bootyflies to shapeshift into various Keter class SCPs and acting like it

And yes, you somehow managed to persuade the Bootiflies to do just that

And no, Kondraki didn't know about this even though he found it odd that his bootiflies didn't obey him that day

You got Kondraki to sit down in a room with Clef while you and Bright was setting up everything

The bootyflies shifted into the Scarlet King and boy sis Kondraki called the MTFs and was boutta shoot him

Everyone in the room had to get him to stop and that it was just a prank (And by everyone I mean just you, Bright and Clef)

Kondraki did manage to stop and was boutta drag you out for a big girl/boy lecture

Well, he did but not before kicked Bright and Clef in their privates first

Needless to say, nobody wanted to prank Kondraki again (Shush, no you don't, yes I'm looking at you from behind the screen and I know that you'll do it again)

[voiceless-terror]

#21 and #46 for kiss prompts, maybe? I can't get enough your writing tbf

kiss on a dare- a little jonmartin season one fluff <3 All in all, this is one of Tim’s better Friday nights.

It’s been ages since Jon’s hung out with them, and never with Martin along for the ride. The Archives had been off to a messy start after the Dog Incident and Jon’s subsequent panic over the state of the place. What used to be an ‘every couple of weeks’ tradition turned into an almost-never one as the newly-assembled team got buried under more and more boxes of dusty statements. He’s pretty astounded that Jon agreed to dinner and drinks- although it’s a Friday night, Jon’s been apt to stay weekends more often than not. He figured if he arranged for it at one of theirs instead of a pub, Jon would be more likely to come. He always preferred less crowded settings.

No, the real feat was getting him to come knowing Martin was invited.

Jon’s been getting...better around him, that’s true. He was perfectly fine at his birthday party, going off about emulsifiers for a solid fifteen minutes. Tim’s always been rather fond of Jon’s infodumping, and if he’s comfortable enough to do it around Martin that must be a good sign. Despite an initial freeze-out, he now thanks Martin for his tea and saves his most pointed comments for Martin’s more egregious screw-ups (and even those have less bite than usual). Still, a colleague does not a friend make, and Jon’s never been good at opening up to people he doesn’t know all that well. However, Jon just nodded at the Martin caveat, seemingly not giving it a second thought. And Martin didn’t seem all that worried either.

Whatever, Tim’s not going to look a gift horse in the mouth. He’s just happy they’re all here, having a good time. It’s late and Jon’s had enough wine to keep a smile on his face. He missed that. It’s nice how easily they slot together, even with all of the upheaval and a new addition. Martin himself isn’t so shy after a drink or two, more willing to engage in banter and keep the conversation going. This is what it should be like all the time, Tim thinks. Shitty archive job or not. 

It’s when they retire to the living room, drinks in hand, that he finally notices the little grin on Sasha’s face. And Tim, knowing exactly what that means, is both a little afraid and excited. Four-drink-Sasha has always been a host unto herself.

“Why don’t,” she begins, a hiccup interrupting her as she slumps into an armchair. Tim snickers and ignores the glare this earns him. “Why don’t we play one of our old games-”

Tim raises a glass in agreement as Jon, predictably, groans. Martin looks quizzically between them. Ah yes, time for your initiation, Marto! Not that they’ve played this in about a year or so, of course, but it's always fun to revisit the good old days.

“Seriously? We’re not children-”

Tim gives Jon a playful slap on the back that sends him flying forward on the couch, spilling a bit of wine on Sasha’s rug. He hopes she doesn’t notice. “C’mon, it’ll be fun, boss! Nothing like it to break the ice, and there’s definitely some ice that needs breaking.”

Martin blinks, hand tightening on his glass. He looks nervous, like he always does when he doesn’t know exactly what’s going on. Which is a shame, because he’s been so nice and open all night. Even chatting with Jon. “Sorry, what are you talking about?”

Jon rolls his eyes, giving Martin a commiserating look. “Truth or dare.”

Martin lets out a disbelieving laugh, relaxing minutely. “Wait, really?”

“Yes, really.” Jon’s foot reaches out to shove at Tim’s leg. “Tim loves pulling ridiculous stunts-”

“-Hey, you loved the karaoke idea-”

“You sing?”

“No.” Tim would dispute that, but the look on Jon’s face declares it a bad idea. “And Sasha likes to ask probing questions.”

Sasha preens, though the remark was certainly not meant as a compliment. “What can I say, I’m the Queen of Truth-”

Tim snorts. “Hacking and blackmail more like-”

“Anyway-” Sasha sings out as Tim dodges a pillow to the face. “Tim….truth or-”

“Dare, always dare.”

“You’re absolutely no fun,” Sasha pouts, though it doesn’t take long for her eyes to narrow in thought. There’s very little Tim won’t do, but that’s a dangerous look. “I dare you...to text…”

“Text? You can do better than that, Sash.”

“Text...Elias.” That’s more like it. 

Jon immediately scowls. “Tim, no-”

“I don’t have his number-”

“I do-”

“Sasha!”

“Jon, it’ll be fine! He’ll just say ‘oops, wrong number’ afterwards, no harm, no foul-”

Tim takes this time to snatch at Sasha’s phone, sitting precariously on the arm of her chair. She doesn’t notice, too busy gesturing at Jon empathically. He scrolls through her contact list.

“And then it’ll come down on me-”

Sasha rolled her eyes. “How is he going to connect it to you? It’s not like he knows we’re all together-”

“Done!” Tim tosses the phone back onto the couch with a little grin. Sasha blinks, looking down in confusion.

“Wait, that’s mine-”

The screech and smack on the arm at Tim’s hastily fired off ‘u up? ;)’ to Elias Bouchard were definitely deserved. He’s sure he’ll face consequences for that in the near future, but Jon and Martin’s immediate laughter had been well worth it. Shouldn’t dish it if you can’t take it, that’s Tim’s motto.

In the next round, Tim manages to get Martin to confess to his poetry-writing habit, an admission that has him turning an attractive shade of red. Jon just giggles quietly to himself as Martin reads through one of his poorer attempts at rhyme saved to the notes of his mobile. Tim watches the two of them; Martin keeps looking up at Jon throughout it all like he’s the only one in the room and god, his crush is so evident and yet Jon is oblivious, smiling at him like he’s not on the receiving end of some of the most loaded glances of all time. 

Martin gets Sasha to admit to her most recent perusal through confidential institute records, which turned out to be previous archival expenses (solely to find out what Elias would cover with their new jobs, of course). At first glance, there wasn’t much in the way of extravagant meals or supplies, but a bit more digging had her finding Gertrude’s extensive travel budget. For an old woman, she certainly was a globe-trotter.

“All I’m saying, Jon, is that we could definitely do with a trip to China-”

“Yes, I’ll be sure to ask Elias about Gertrude’s trip to China, something I certainly shouldn’t know about, and he’ll have to let us go.”

“Refill?” Martin’s on his feet, taking Jon’s wine glass in his hand and Tim watches as their fingers brush- go Martin!- and yet Jon just nods his thanks, completely oblivious to the seduction taking place before him. Tim’s given it some thought and honestly, he thinks they’d make a cute couple. An odd pair, for sure, but Jon’s so soft once you get to know him, and Martin’s one of the funniest, sweetest guys he knows. They could be good for each other.

“Well, I still think it’s worth a try.” Sasha’s eyes are starting to blink heavily - she’ll be out for the count tonight, for sure. “Anyway, it’s your turn. I dare you-”

“I didn’t even pick!” Jon says, though he doesn’t seem too put out by it. This is the Jon Martin should know, the easy-humored, smiling man sprawled out before him. He’s even taken his little sweater vest and tie off, looking more like the familiar friend from research Tim knows so well. It warms his heart.

“Fine. Truth or dare?”

“Dare, I suppose. Seeing as how you already have one queued up.”

“I dare you to...to...to give a little kiss to someone in this room.” She waves her glass around imperiously. “Anyone you like.”

Silence. Tim gives Sasha a warning look that she ignores. She’s well in her cups, and he supposes any sense of propriety has gone out the window along with her sobriety. He’s actually seen Jon give quite a few kisses on a particularly memorable New Years Eve, but that was a different time. He doesn’t want him to feel pressured, not when he’s just starting to open back up.

 “Jon doesn’t have to if he doesn’t want to-”

Sasha rolled her eyes. “Oh come on, you remember-”

“It doesn’t matter- Jon, you can skip this one if you like, we can think of something else-”

“Tim, it’s alright.” Jon puts a hand on his arm to stop the argument, and there’s a strange look in his eyes that can’t be attributed to liquor. It’s mock-serious, almost playful paired with his little sly smile. He thinks for a moment that Jon’s going to lean in and kiss him but instead he gets up from the sofa in a smooth motion and walks across the room to Martin, who’s just turned around with two glasses in hand. He freezes in place as Jon gets on his very tippy toes, takes his face in both hands, and kisses him. 

Jonathan Sims. Kissing Martin Blackwood. Against a kitchen counter. Martin Blackwood, who, once he’s over his surprise, puts the drinks down behind him and kisses right the hell back, arms winding around Jon’s waist like they belong there.

What. The. Fuck.

_____

“The leg bit was a nice touch.”

“Hmm?” Jon’s in Martin’s lap, sprawled out on his couch back at his own flat, eyes closed in contentment as he leans back against the other man’s chest. Martin’s got one hand in his hair, and the other entwined with Jon’s, twirling the black ring on his finger. It’s heavenly.

“Thought you were trying to climb me.”

“Well, you usually pick me up at that point, make it easier.”

“Sorry, next time.” Kissing Jon’s always fun but kissing him out in the open, in front of their friends? Was that something they could do now? “Should we tell them we’ve been dating for two months?” 

Two whole months since that night in Document Storage when Jon had finally let his guard down. When Martin had held him in his arms. Jon was very particular about keeping up appearances, though that all seemed to have crumbled tonight. Sasha rather fashioned herself a matchmaker, and Jon didn’t do anything to dissuade the fact. It’d been nice, having their relationship to themselves, the secret of it, the obliviousness of their friends who still thought Jon only tolerated him. It’s not that he wanted to keep it that way, of course, but it was nice while they were still figuring it out. 

“If you’d like. Maybe it’s time.” Jon tilts his head back, giving Martin a fond look. “Though I know how much you enjoy playing the lovesick fool-”

“There’s something so poetic about unrequited love, yknow?”

“All the more when it’s requited, I’d say.” Martin couldn’t argue with that. He leans down to give Jon’s forehead a peck. 

“Hmm. Give it a few more weeks. Act out the honeymoon phase for a bit, it’ll be fun.”

And when Jon squeezes his hand and smiles back, Martin thinks he won’t need to do much acting at all.

ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/31318724