#I just dont feel like being slurred at for being a “”woman“”

[pinustree]

Everytime I draw my fursona all I think is "If not trans masc, why have top surgery scars? 🤨" "if not masc why give fursona stubble?? 🤨 🤨" etc etc

(Obviously I know these arent inherently trans masc things, but for my own fursona I view it as such)

[seaweedstarshine]

Sometimes I think of Amy Pond, who grew up being called mad by those who wielded the word as a tool of exclusion and shame —

Amy Pond, who though forced into the hands of four psychiatrists, still clung to that which they called madness until those systems which elevate psychosocial conformity above humanity stripped it from her —

Amy Pond, whose imaginary friend reappeared for a single hour after twelve years and reignited that faith before disappearing for two more years —

Amy Pond, who spent those those two years under the same implicit threat ingrained in her through psychiatric violence, and thus began to believe the man who stopped the invasion was “just a madman with a box,” only for him to agree, and to also call her “mad, impossible Amy Pond,” reframing madness as non-negative for the first time in her life —

Amy Pond, who ignored the disembodied voice of her imaginary friend even as she ran away with him for real, who still lived each day with the traumatic internalization of deviancy dictated upon her by the psychiatric-industrial complex that shaped her from childhood —

Amy Pond, who wouldn't acknowledge the Doctor's voice, such that it took an Angel in her eye that was literally killing her to ensure she couldn't reality check herself —

Amy Pond, who stood before a room which muttered about “the psychiatrists we brought her to,” and though afraid, escaped their rigid parameters of acceptable existence.

[mothslimes]

said it before i say it again. maybe it's less internalized misogyny and more "girls who look and act like this literally bullied me from kindergarten to 12th grade and beyond" so no i would rather not talk to girls who treat female beauty standards as the holy law

[transmaverique]

gonna be honest I see anyone talking about this "my gender is more complicated than yours" shit as someone who genuinely cannot comprehend that other people that don't share certain traits with them can still in fact have rich interior lives. as an agender trans woman who uses she/her I've never had anyone say it to me who wasn't (usually unknowingly) transmisogynistic

see but im not talking about "rich interior lives" and the assumption that i am is exactly what im talking about. i am talking about the actual physical way that reality treats and percieves me in comparison to the way it treats and percieves you. saying my gender is "more complex" means to me that i am physically incapable of existing in a strictly binary world and that there is no thing i can pass as bc "binary man" and "binary woman" are both incorrect for me. and the Cisiety in question does not allow androgyny to exist - it is exclusively the timeframe people have to decide whether they think you are a cisman or a ciswoman, or a failure and a freak. i dont subscribe to that "binary privilege" shit, thats not how privilege works. but there are differences in the ways both you and i can navigate this strictly binary Cisiety!!! and those differences deserve to be named, imo

like. again. i dont have to comfort you about your own internal sense of gender before youll listen to me about my experiences in the real world as genderqueer. as a different sort of transsexual than you.

(and bc i Know what binary ppl love to say: i know not everyone is 'capable of passing'. what i am talking about specifically is the difference between being unable to pass as a cis woman or a cis man vs being unable to pass bc what i am does not exist AT ALL in a binary society, and both of those things are incorrect ans unattainable.)

(anyways if that language is too imperfect for you thats like fine but. its just confusing to me, i dont get why its hard to understand what we are talking about here. our experiences w our nonbinary genders are completely different! why do i have to discuss them like theyre the same?)

[rattownofficial]

maybe its a steaming hot take but i feel like a lot of Crazy Karen videos are like middle aged autistic women and i think thats something people should think about a bit more often

[1800-page-not-found]

Being drunk and complaining how you think your bf is prettier than you (genshin men x fem reader)

I'm picking the men who i think have feminine facial features for this, but if you'd like, feel free to ask for a character that hasn't been written :)

(attempted)pure fluff and having your pretty boy reassure you that youre pretty too <3

Albedo was studying your reaction to the potion he made, or 'special drink' as he'd like to call it. It was apparently supposed to taste like whatever the drinker liked most-yours just happened to be alcohol. At least he's learned that the drink will also bear whatever effects the original drink may have. Your face was warm as you drank your-how many shots have you had again? This..was alcohol right? He didn't poison you by luring you with his pretty face? Oh my fucking god he's so pretty. You gaze at his face lovingly, and suddenly shouting, "I can't believe my boyfriend is prettier than me..." You start crying. "Your so fucking gorgeous Albedo oh my god.." You hit your head on the table, surprising him. "Y/n!" he rushed to your side and caressed you forehead, which was now red. "Darling," he stated, "I think you're the prettiest person I've ever seen." You threw his hands off and pointed at him accusingly. "Albedo...we need to get you a mirror," you sob, "you are literally the prettiest thing to ever exist." you started to absolutely praise his whole fucking existence because if you dont you really dont deserve this guy hes fucking gorgeous

Kazuha was panicking at your state of mind. You were off the side of the path/road, hugging your knees and absolutely sobbing. "Y/n! Y/n!" he shook your shoulders franticly. Now, usually he's pretty calm but your the type of person to get into some deep shit whenever your alone. You looked up at kazuha, teary-eyed. This guy with his weird sense of smell could immediately smell the strong stench of alcohol on you. "My lovely and pretty boyfriend has come to save me again..." you pulled him down with a hug as he collapsed onto you. worried about hurting you he attempted to free himself, but drunk y/n is hella fucking strong, like the equivalent of being on steroids. "y/n i dont wanna hurt you or crush you..please let go.." You were not having it. "My darling kazuha..youre so fucking pretty.." you cry even harder. "how can a guy be prettier than a girl?!" this man's shoulder was drenched with tears. and despite being drunk, you noticed his shoulder was wet, so you switched to the other fucking shoulder. "Why do i have the muscles and you have the face?!?! shouldnt it be the opposite?" you cried even harder. like-damn.. kazuha looks like he jumped into the ocean and came out. admitting his defeat, kazuha now only sought to comfort you. "hey..shh..theres no need to cry love, you know i think your the prettiest girl out there right?.." he patted your head softly, whispering only the loveliest of compliments in your ear, until you fell asleep.

Kaeya laughed. This little shit knows he's gorgeous and practically flaunts his beauty, but seeing you insecure about it made him a bit sad, so why not cheer you up? "Y/n...your the woman I want to marry and you think I'd fall for someone who's not on my level?" He grins teasingly, as he places a finger on your chin and lifts your face up. "If anyone, and I mean anyone tells you otherwise, just tell me ok babe?" he peppers you with kisses, and stops you from making a mess in the tavern..If his brother were to find out, he'd for sure kick you and him out. "Kaeya, my beloved, the love of my life..." you slurred, "please stop using such a cringy name.." You were falling asleep, tired from blabbing on how pretty he was. After all it never hurt to hear such compliments from you. "Well," he smiled at you with love, "I'd like to call you my wife soon."

Heizou was currently walking just outside of inazuma city, after the tenryou commission recieved multipule complaints, he had over heard that it was near the place you'd like to hangout, he got curious and decided to check it out himself. (the commission were flabbergasted asf, well i suppose if its you then its a whole different story) And here you were, sitting on one of the larger branches of a tree crying loudly. Like...sobbing hysterically. He was surprised to say the least, you usually were quite happy go lucky. He studied you, noticing the bottle in you hand, as well as the flushed expression on your face. Just how much did you drink? You had finally noticed your curious boyfriend studying and observing you. "My pretty boyfriend the love of my life..." you slurred. suddenly, you shot down from the tree and charged at him, engulfing heizou in a tight embrace. "Woah! y/n are you alright?" he laughed, you were quite harmless when you were drunk, though that did leave you defenseless and made him a bit worried when you were without him. "you bastard..." you seethed in anger. "What the fuck is your skin routine? how are you so gorgeous? perfect? i love you soooo much heizou.." To be honest, he never recieved lots of compliments, as he was usually deemed annoying. perhaps he was good at masking it, but boy his insides were practically on fire. He loved you to the ends of the observable universe and back. he would gush at every compliment you gave him. "Y/n...you are the absolute best thing that could've happened to me, sometimes I feel like I dont even deserve you. You are the prettiest person i have ever known, and you make me the happiest. I love you so much." ok...so now he's tearing up. you, still drunk but still as in love with this lovely man as you are sober, made sure he felt loved on your walk home.

Venti is girlypop already saying every compliment that comes to mind, hell this guy is about to sing about how much he loves you and how gorgeous you are for hours, EVERYWHERE. the whole mondstat shall know how much he adores you. Thats because he's also drunk!! <3 You honestly, and swore, that you would watch him incase he does something stupid, but here you are, drunk (venti the lovely drunkard is hella good at convincing you to do stupid stuff with him.) and complaining how absolutely magnificent his face is. Although it is his deceased friends face, he takes it as you would get along with his deceased friend, and that makes him happy. a bit self concious though when you mention his physical features,(you dont just like his looks right?...right?) but he tries his best to stay positive. You know he's the anemo archon, but not that he takes on the looks of dead people. You suddenly burst into tears. "Venti i'm SO SO SORRY.." drunk venti is confused, flabbergasted, confused pikachu face kind of emotion. "Heyyyyyyy dont cry you'll make me sad to" he pats your head, a bit roughly since well he's drunk. way too much alcohol for an archon to drink. "Your pretty y/n verrrrrrrrry pretty." you shot up and look at him. "No! thats *hic*not why im *hic*crying!" you cried too much, to the point where you were hiccupping and couldnt breath (idk how to really describe it but yeah) "I made*hic* you s*hic*ad!" did you notice? In that moment, venti started to sniffle. So you noticed every little detail, even when drunk? Oh how he loved you so much. He was so so thankful to have you by his side. Now...this all happened at the angel's share, you guys were definitely banned from coming there ever again.. not even after paying off venti's rather expensive tab.

--------------------------

THE END >:) it got a lil angsty but thats ok

should i do pretty adult women too ehehehehhehehehehehheheh

[k0droid]

would they say the n-word / are they racist: twisted wonderland edition

Inspired by twstowo's taxes headcanon post.

I meant to post this during february but i just didnt.

REMEMBER THAT IS ALL FOR SHITS N GIGGLES. IF YOU THINK YOUR POOKIE IS/IS NOT A RACIST, REBLOG OR LEAVE A COMMENT

4/2 edit: JESUS CHRIST DON'T TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY 😭😭 THESE AREN'T REAL HCS, JUST SOMETHING STUPID FOR BLACK TWST FANS TO ENJOY

GRIM: Yess that's my baby boy my son my son yes I give him the pass

RIDDLE: Couldn't waterboard the n-word outta him. Uses 'Off With Your Head' to punish anyone who uses slurs

TREY: Wouldn't. Not a racist and has no interest in saying the word.

CATER: Researches what's offensive to certain groups so he can stay respectful, no n-word from him

ACE: ace is literally that one white friend who thinks his n-word 'jokes' are funny (they're not) and he walks around with Riddle's collar because of that. He def went to a middle school named after a Confederate, but he's not racist for the most part "I play basketball so-" or "I'm gonna say the n-word: ninja!!" - 🥸

DEUCE: No. He's a good guy. He would never and if he said something remotely offensive, he'd apologize with tears

LEONA: YESS BLACK KING 🗣🔥🔥‼‼‼‼

JACK: Could and he does, but only occasionally. Punches the shit outta Ace's shoulder if he says something distasteful

RUGGIE: YES he just light-skinnted 😕 Ace would make fun of him for eating all the stereotypical foods

AZUL: Slightly racist. Just slightly. Seems like the type to get a lil tense when a tanned, well-built dude walks into the Monstro Lounge. starts clutching his pearls n shit

JADE: No, I don't really see him being racist or saying the n-word

FLOYD: Probably the least likely to say the n-word and would get offended that you even assumed. Like his entire mood would change if you mention it "Ehh Shrimpy? You tryna get squeezed? What made you think I would say that??" *fucking kills you*

KALIM: No, no n-word from Al-Asim. I could see him as a racist though. i think of kalim as purposely ignorant so in my mind, he's INTENTIONAL with his microaggressions but no one really calls him out on it.

JAMIL: Yes but only cuz I give him the pass.

VIL: Doesn't say the n-word (he knows better) but probably screams it in his thoughts. idk guys vil just seems a bit racist.

ROOK: Who's in Paris. LOL but I don't think he'd say the n-word. Also probably one of the least racist here. But he'd bring up eugenics in a convo and ruin the mood completely.

EPEL: I genuinely don't know if he would or not. Like because he from some rural area (to my knowledge, i js started book 5), i feel like he wouldn't because he'd know better. but i also heard that epel is misogynistic and hating black people & hating women go hand in hand (misogynoir)

IDIA: No but it wouldn't be surprising. i can already imagine him in that cod lobby. probably gets his slurs from cater

ORTHO: No my sweet child would not say the n-word. would blast idia out of this world with a charged beam if he said anything offensive

MALLEUS: No.

LILIA: Probably has said it before and is the most educated when it comes to black culture in the diasomnia group other than sebek (my 4c king)

SEBEK: No, in fact i might give him the pass (#mixedking😍❤️)

SILVER: No but probably a little colorist. yk how some black men love to scream from the mountain tops that they love white women? well silver is that white woman. js saying

this was fun to make. pls remember that its just a silly post, dont get mad because only hit dogs will holler.

"what abt the staff/yuus/extras-" send an ask :3

4/2 edit: its crazy cuz the only mad people are white🧍🏾‍♀️

[satrs]

i just read the cliche post and like- DAMNNNNNN

But now isagi's part got me thinking what if, milf reader??? VEKFBKSNS please i just wanna be this hot ass mom who has teens drooling on her, i dONT HAVE ANY SCENARIO IN MIND BUT PLEASEE i am begging fr

AHHHH OMG YOUR MIND!!! VSKDKXKX THANK YOU FOR THIS!!!

ＭＩＬＦ!?

ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ; ɢᴜʏꜱ ᴡʜᴏ ɪ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴀʀᴇ ᴍɪʟꜰ ʟᴏᴠᴇʀꜱ!

ꜰᴇᴀᴛᴜʀɪɴɢ; Isagi Yoichi. Itoshi Sae. Shidou Ryusei. Nagi Seishiro. Otoya Eita.

Tags; Age gap(they're in their early 20's, reader in her late 30's). mention of kids. breeding kink. creampie. nicknames(good boy, ma', mommy, baby). some subby guyss

ᴀʟʟ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ ᴀʀᴇ 18+!!! // ɴᴏᴛ ᴘʀᴏᴏꜰʀᴇᴀᴅ

ISAGI YOICHI.

I just knowww he's a sucker for hot MILFs ♡

He loves everything about them! He loves how they are so mature and how they're so experienced in sex life!

And you are no exception. He was always looking forward to seeing you, feeling the urge to take care of you after you had another stressful day with work and your kids :(

You jumped up and down, rocking your hips at a tantalizing speed, leaving him comepletely pussydrunk.

"Yes baby fuckkk, use me." Your aching heat clenched at his words. He was the best. Letting you use him as you pleased, getting rid of

all the stress you had throughout the day.

He threw is head back, adams apple throbbing as your rythm increased, his hands flying to take a hold of your asscheeks. "Yesyesyes, fuck!", he groaned, to lost over the feeling of you around him, subconsiously thursting his hips up into yours, causing you to moan out his name.

No man was ever able to please you like this young man did, always tending to all your needs.

ITOSHI SAE.

Hear me out. I think he would really enjoy himself a nice milf.

It’s just something about you that makes his cock stir in his pants, probably the fact that you were so ridiculously beautiful, aging like fine wine.

He loves and worshippes every single part of your body, from your pregnancy strechmarks to your amazing thighs. And he never failed to let you know how beautiful you were.

"God.", you sighed out, hand threading into his red locs. "Don't stop Sae, oh shit!" You moans caused the man to groan into your aching heat, hands firmly griping your thighs, holding you in place, wide open for his mouth to devour.

Your legs started to lock around his head, almost robbing his breath. But he didn't mind. Hell, he would die a happy man if he were to die being suffocated by your elegant thighs.

It barely took you one more flick of his tongue to succumb to him, legs shaking at the hard impact of your orgasm. He lapped up your juices, overstimulating you in the process.

"Fuck, I could do this all day."

SHIDOU RYUSEI.

He is literally obsessed with MILFs idc.

Would do ANYTHING for a gorgeous woman like yourself.

Suck your sore titties? Done. Feed your baby because you’re so exhausted? Already finished. Fucking your brains out while your child is at daycare? Oh, he loves that.

He always tells you how he would love to have kids with you himself, knowing they would be beautiful given to your genetics.

„Yeah? You like that ma‘? I know you do.“

Whines and whimpers escaped your plumb lips, his cock drilling in and out of you from behind at an rapid pace.

„Yes Ryusei! I love it, love it!“ you slurred put incoherent words of praise into the pillow, causing the mans chest to swell with pride.

„I‘ll fill you up so good, make you a mommy again. Whatcha say?“

You whined at that, back arching even further and the image of him filling you to the brim with his juice heavy in your mind.

Maybe another child would be nice, right?

NAGI SEISHIRO.

Loves them bc he is so lazy urgh

You just take such great care of him, not letting him lift a finger and you never complain about him ever.

And to top it all of, you were so incredibly sexy, he couldn’t wrap his mind around it.

He just feels like being in heaven when he rings at your doorbell late at night when your kid is asleep, begging you to take care of him :(

„You’re such a good boy you know that right, Sei'?“ you questioned while your slim fingers stroked his throbbing cock.

„Mhmm, yes mommy. Such a good boy for you. Only you“ he whined, dangerously close to his orgasm.

„Well then“, you began, pace of your hand increasing, stimulating his sensitive tip with your tumb, „prove it to me and cum, babyboy.“

He was a slave to you and your words, immediately cumming all over your hand and his pelvis.

Whispers of thanks spilled from his lips, „Thank you so much mommy.“

OTOYA EITA.

MILF hunter🤷🏽‍♀️

Being a single mom is not for the weak, causing you to sometimes be more dominant with the people around you.

He just loves when you put him into him place, calming him down from his prideful behavior

Acting like a careless and heartbreaking playboy? Nah, not around your watch.

"So good, you feel so good", eita commented, dick silding in and out of your squeezed together thighs. "Mhm? think you deserve to be inside of me?", you inquired in a teasing manner, smirk adoring your lips at his ragged breathing.

He didn't say anything, already knowing the answer. "That's what I thought. Next time, you better not act out of line again, hm?"

Even though he was on top of you, you were the one in control. Always.

He nodded, completely falling under our spell, enjoying the feeling of your plush thighs around his aroused length.

ᵃˡˡ ᶜᵒⁿᵗᵉⁿᵗ ᵇᵉˡᵒⁿᵍˢ ᵗᵒ k-azus.°

[atthebell-moved]

hi, i completely agree that the fandom has a problem with misogyny and often fails at self-introspection. my question is, do you have any resources/tips/thoughts on how to be better about it? even, how to recognize it in yourself the first place? "ok i'll stop being a misogynist now" is a lot easier said than done, especially for people who might not be that educated on the subject, and majority of the people in this fandom are quite young as well.

this is long as fuck and possibly somewhat incoherent bc it took so long to write but i did my best

my biggest tip for people who don't know much about misogyny is to look at your own behavior and learn how to clock what you're doing as sexist.

are you criticizing a female creator? think about why you're doing it, what the actual beef you have with them is. if it seems to be just a sense of discomfort or thinking they're annoying or overly loud or pushy, think about male ccs who act the same way and why you dont consider them annoying. are you annoyed with them for being on a male cc's stream? why? does it feel like theyre taking up too much attention? do you get annoyed with them for talking too much or flirting with guys? for gaming especially-- do you get annoyed with them for not knowing something or being "bad" at a game? think about why that is and why its just funny when a male cc is bad at games or doesnt know something.

a HUGE problem i see in this fandom is the Madonna-whore complex, repackaged as the little sister-racist dichotomy (kudos to @yourlittlemenace for that phrasing).

if a female cc is deemed to be "playing nice" (doesnt talk too much, is "nice", streams with male ccs but doesnt flirt with them, isn't "overtly sexual"), she's the little sister of the group. all the male ccs "protect" her, she literally folds their laundry, she doesnt call out how people treat her, and the fandom pretends that this is a normal and cool way to treat women who are public figures. this also goes for mom/big sister/etc. if you think you haven't done this, think about all the aus where you've forced puffy into some kind of maternal or sisterly role when it made no sense. then think about how pissed people got when she decided not to be the server therapist and was "mean" to Tommy (in lore, with permission. that she didnt even need to get. see that clip i rbed earlier from her podcast.)

if the fandom decides she doesnt play nice, if she flirts with male ccs too much or stands up for herself or points out how unfair it is that she's being treated this way, she gets demeaned, harassed, and shunned by the fandom. consider, again, puffy. consider how niki flirted with wilbur and talked about misogyny and got called a racist for *checks notes* "speaking to schlatt and fundy" and "not being a native english speaker". she got called a slut and a queerbaiter for kissing another woman despite being bisexual.

consider how hard people went down on hannah for having said the r slur several years back versus how hard they went on dream for the same thing. and how people dug it up as a direct response to her being on stream with dream. consider how every time hannah talks about how unfair it is that the mcc subreddit treats her like trash, she has to delete all her tweets bc they harass her to hell and back and act like she's an asshole for pointing out their hypocrisy.

the fandom doesnt do this across the board; i shouldnt have to say this, but its not an everyone versus no one issue. some people do this outright and loud, some dont seem to realize theyre doing it, and a few people dont do it at all (incredibly rare, i can count on one hand the number of people who genuinely seem to try to avoid these issues, which is why im complaining).

in terms of lore, have you ever once done analysis on a female character? why do you think you haven't? the bechdel-wallace test is an (imperfect) way of gauging how a piece of media ignores women and prioritizes men. think about the fact that there are FOUR female ccs on the DSMP and they are continually ignored in favor of male characters. consider that puffy and aimsey both talked about trying to do genuine lore and getting shafted, either because no one was online and wouldn't put in the effort to stream with them or because they received insane amounts of criticism for breaking anything on the server, despite the clear lack of "no griefing" rules and the precedent that you can blow other people's shit up (tommy leveling one of puffy's builds, amongst many other examples).

a quick thing about ships: have you ever wondered why m/m ships are so popular? the general consensus amongst people who care about feminism and are into fandom studies is that for a long period of time, m/m was hugely popular because women are so rarely written as full and complete characters in any media. so people took to engaging with m/m ships and writing about them because they were the most fulfilling relationships, and because misogyny led them to be predisposed to be uninterested in female characters.

say an m/m ship is incredibly popular, something like, i dunno, john watson and sherlock holmes from bbc sherlock. lets also say the canonical media presents one or both of the characters with a female love interest. how do you think a fandom that prioritizes m/m ships and is primed to be disinterested in women as characters (either because of our society's role in teaching people that women do not matter or because of fandom's history in assuming female characters are not fleshed out) is going to react? if you said theyre going to send undue amounts of criticism her way and act like its an act of homophobia to give a canonically straight character a female love interest, congrats, you've figured out a huge component in fandom misogyny. take this, amplify it over several decades, and add the psychic damage that supernatural gave society. queerbaiting is bad but mistreating female characters in service of nonexistent queer relationships is also bad.

this is relevant in general but i also believe its relevant for the dsmp because of the complete lack of m/f ships. aside from phil and kristin, who are literally married irl and kristin isn't even on the server, there are no m/f ships that involve female creators. this is not, despite what you may think, due to the inherently yaoi nature of minecraft roleplay. this is because the creators, including the male ones, are afraid of the blowback of m/f flirting and how fucking awful people are to female ccs anytime it happens. once again look at niki. as another example, consider how notfounders harassed the living daylights out of mxmtoon for flirting with gnf on twitter. if i was a cc i would avoid it like the plague too considering how happy people are to dig shit up about them or accuse them of being a slut or an attention whore/"pick me girl" for speaking to a man.

one last thing, this is more about fanart than anything else but stop drawing women to look like teenage boys. the amount of fanart i see where i literally cannot tell if someone has drawn niki or tommy is fucking insane. niki has curves. draw her with them. if you cannot draw women or people outside a very specific body type you cannot draw. fatphobia and misogyny have a clear overlap.

i cant think of anything else and ive already spent forever on this. look into feminist media analysis. think twice about how you react to female ccs & female characters. consider not just what characters have interesting stories but who is allowed to have interesting stories. you might be neglecting someone who has a lot going on because you're dismissing a female character as inherently less likely to be interesting. you might not even know someone has an interesting story because the fandom neglects it so completely.

as a final little note: like i said earlier, if you're not familiar with gender & sexuality studies, you may not know this, but homophobia and transphobia are rooted in misogyny. the idea that gender is immutable and rigid is because of the patriarchy. this is why gendered slurs are used against queer people and why queer men in particular get accused of and demeaned for being feminine. your understanding of queerphobia is incomplete without considering how sexism plays a role.

also go read everything rayne fisher-quann has ever written but especially this piece on getting woman'd and listen to you're wrong about

[ftmtftm]

something i wanted to ask, genuinely, is if you think the labels transmisogyny/misandry and the way theyre used can really be helpful

i personally think they can be but with how so many ppl try to frame it as "exclusive" forms of oppression just doesnt help at all. yes, transmisogyny does mainly happen to trans women/fems, but a lot of ppl refuse to believe it could also happen to trans men/mascs. and i believe it can go the same way with transmisandry as ive seen multiple ppl describe wut it is and see how it could be applied to trans women/fems. and that doesnt even acknowledge intersex ppl, whether theyre trans or not. i feel like labeling it in specific ways to say "this is an intersection of oppression" without going "this is an exclusive experience" is beneficial to all sides, but ppl try to gatekeep with labels like "tma" and "tme" and so on. its like saying a gay guy cant call themself a dyke bc "youre not a lesbian and therefore u cant reclaim that slur" even if theyve been called a dyke before. it really just feels like the labels of transmisogyny and transmisandry is used as a way to fuel the fires of oppression olympics by saying that "if ur a trans man u experience less oppression than a trans woman." and it seems to be mainly fueled by the idea of "woman (oppressed) + trans (oppressed) = really oppressed" whereas "man (not oppressed) + trans (oppressed) = not as oppressed" when its nothing like that.

its also incredibly hard to find Any information about transmisandry. i always see "trans men just have it/pass easier" and even other transphobic statements of how going on T makes trans men more aggressive and assertive. i feel like tumblr has been the only place ive seen any genuine discussion about transmisandry and even then its not great or very informative.

i believe that both transmisandry and transmisogyny should be acknowledged as real forms of oppression rather than being used as a way to oppress ppl further.

i dont wish to cause an argument as these r just my thoughts and i genuinely want to hear yours on it too

So the TL;DR my opinion sort of boils down to "Yes, I think they can be incredibly useful terms when used with intention and clarity of purpose" but there's a lot of nuance to that opinion. Basically though - I mostly agree with you on a conceptual level anon. I just wanted to write an essay.

(and also I don't fully address some things in this ask because frankly I'm burnt out and don't want to talk about them at the moment and I made this blog to talk about my special interests anyway. Sue me ‪¯\_(ツ)_/¯‬)

Something I've been noticing in my reading of Intersectional/trans-inclusive Feminist literature, combined with my engagement with trans activism, over the last few years is: We're all very, very afraid of talking about sexism right now and it absolutely makes sense why.

It makes sense because the conversation has been ground to dirt by TERFs constantly yelling about "sex-based oppression" as a means to be transmisogynist and degrade the womanhood of trans women. However the response to this has been deeply flawed in my opinion.

Instead of actually addressing sexism as it's own distinct form of oppression under an Intersectional lense, we've simply made a hard left into only discussing gender informed oppression and only legitimizing gender informed oppression in the form of misogyny. It's a very uninformed response in my opinion actually - but that also makes sense because it's currently very hard to be informed on general feminist theory and politics at the moment because Radical Feminism is a fucking plague.

In reality though, sexism and misogyny are two different forms of oppression that often overlap because gender and sex are different classes of identity that often overlap.

This degradation of language - both from TERFs conflating sex and gender and from Intersectionals/progressives separating the two so hard they don't even acknowledge sex - is what I think is part of the cause of this problem that is leaving trans men / trans mascs with a massive hole in our ability to discuss our experiences. And not just trans men either!!! It's also nonbinary and intersex people as well who are harmed by this void.

So that begs the question: How do we actually talk about sexism in an Intersectional Feminist, trans inclusive, capacity that combats Radical Feminist rhetoric on sexism?

And the answer? Is carefully, consciously, and in a manner that is aware of several different experiences within the nebulous concept of female identity.

I will actually be using the word "female" as a term a decent amount throughout this post. For the sake of this discussion I am defining "female" as anyone anyone who presently identifies as female due to their assigned sex as well as anyone who is socially treated/viewed as female due to their gender, legal, and/or medical statuses. In this post "female" is an umbrella term that includes cis women, trans men, trans women, nonbinary people, and intersex people who feel that definition applies to them in relation to their sex.

Because the fact of the matter is that Patriarchy and our society at large hate women and they hate people who are assigned female and they hate people who are female and those are distinct categories of people with a lot of overlap and a lot of differences.

Female identity is like venn diagram of sex informed experiences that cis women, trans women, trans men, nonbinary people, and intersex people all have a place in for various different reasons. It's a diverse category of experiences and this should be a touchstone for solidarity, not division in my opinion. The experiences and needs of one group don't inherently negate the experiences and needs of another similar group, even if they conflict, you know?

It's a concept I've actually adopted from disability activists, who often talk about the ways in which disability activism often has to address conflicting needs because sometimes some disabled people's needs are in direct conflict with each other!! Conflicting needs are not something unique to disability activism though.

Most groups and classes people have conflicting needs within themselves and I think there's a lot to be learned in gendered activism from disability activists in this regard. I think often in activist discussions a lot of people stop when situations stop impacting them directly instead of trying to find commonality and empathy with similar experiences. It's easy to have knee jerk reactions, it's harder to pause and contemplate.

So, let's actually contemplate transmisogyny and transandrophobia/transmisandry as terms for a moment.

Transmisogyny was coined as a term by Julia Serano in 2007 in her book The Whipping Girl and I do think it's incredibly useful for describing the ways in which transphobia (the broader oppression of trans individuals) intersects with misogyny (the broader oppression of women) in specific ways wrapped up into a specific term.

I've engaged in a lot of criticism of The Whipping Girl because, well, I think for just about every excellent idea Serano posits about the trans feminine experience she undercuts it with White Feminist rhetoric and simple "cis men and women are opposites therefore trans men and women are opposites" type rhetoric that harms her arguments more than helps them. HOWEVER! Serano herself even articulates that misogyny and transphobia may intersect in ways that impact nonbinary and trans masculine individuals differently from trans feminine individuals, and that additional language may be required to fill that gap in The Whipping Girl!!

So now there's a bit of a linguistically philosophical discussion to be had here on the function of language and what language we can actually use to fill the hole trans men experience with our language - which is also where we dive back into talking about concepts like conflicting needs and sexism.

When creating terminology (or jargon), one must take into account several things like clarity and context, which is why personally - I do not like the term "transmisandry" at all. I use it as a tag because I know some people prefer it as a term and I'd like my posts to reach that audience as well. Generally speaking though - I think any inclusion of "misandry" as a term will always be a nonstarter in most discussions on gender. It's much too loaded of a word because of it's association with the misogynistic actions of MRAs among several other semantic reasons.

An argument could, I think, be made for a term like "transsexism" which would describe the intersection of transphobia (the broader oppression of trans individuals) and sexism (the broader oppression of female individuals) but I think that is still too broad if we want to talk about trans masculine experiences specifically. (Though I do still think it may have contextual use as a term quite frankly - that's just beyond the scope of this post).

So? Then we come to transandrophobia and a conversation on misogynistic, sexist responses to masculinity in people society forcibly identified as "female women" under patriarchy.

I want to state that off the bat that I take a lot of issue with the way people dismiss trans men's experiences as just "general transphobia" or "default transphobia" because... Why are you automatically treating a man's experiences as the universal default? Especially when there are things based on the intersection of his manhood and marginalization that he experiences that women of the same marginalization don't?

I have this issue with most other conversations about the intersection of marginalized identity and manhood honestly. It actually really reeks of unconscious misogynist bias to me. But I digress, that's not the subject of this post.

I think a lot about Brandon Teena and the motivations for his murder. I think a lot about Lou Sullivan's diary entries about his loneliness and isolation with regard to being around trans women and lesbians - as well as his history fighting for his right to medical transition. I think about P. Carl's musings about the ways in which his entire community abandoned him once he came out as a trans man as opposed to a lesbian woman. I think about Irreversible Damage by Abigal Shrier and the way she manipulated - if I'm remembering correctly - YouTuber, Chase Ross into misleading interviews that skewed his words and stories to attempt to "prove" her points about how "our girls" are being manipulated into transgenderism via social contagion spread through platforms like YouTube.

I think about the ways in which trans mascs - particularly those on HRT - actively avoid medical care because of the deeply gendered nature of gynecological care and also because we are treated like medical freaks and abominations when we do try to seek that care. I think about the ways our bodies are inherently, deeply impacted by the overturning of Roe V. Wade and how our decisions to not carry children via abortion or hysterectomy - or our desire to carry children - are met with the phenomenon of medical misogyny like any other woman or female individual but in a way that also explicitly intersects with our transness.

I think about the ways in which Patriarchal society sees my "female" body in direct opposition to my identity as a "man" and how that is something that needs to be "corrected" back into "female womanhood" via rape and assault. I think about my own corrective assault a lot. I think about how the 2015 National Trans Survey actually found higher self reported instances with sexual assault in trans men than in trans women. I think about how I personally see that as a touchstone of solidarity with my lesbian siblings and especially with my other butch siblings who also have their expressions of masculinity treated as deviancy that deserves corrective action.

I apologize for diverting into less of an academic musing into prose and also for diverging from the subject of this ask directly into a much larger essay - but I am simply so tired of trying to say that I and other trans masculine people are people worthy of having our own language for our own experiences instead of just being dismissed as a privileged class - quite literally on the basis of our own oppression.

Especially when people use the words of someone like Julia Serano to say we don't deserve that language when she herself posited that maybe we should have it. Especially when Kimberlé Crenshaw - the woman who created the theory of Intersectionality that Serano is attempting to engage with in The Whipping Girl - has stated that one of the goals of Intersectionality is to create language for and give voice to marginalized identities that otherwise are not given language and voice.

So - What do you call it when trans masculine people are explicitly targeted on the basis of their trans masculinity? What do you call that intersection of sexism, misogyny, and transphobia that misgenders and attacks trans masculinity explicitly? Because that isn't "general transphobia" - that is transphobia motivated by a Patriarchal desire for control over the broader "female identity" that society is seeing as "too masculine".

It's trans-andro-phobia. Transphobia targeted at a particular group of trans individuals on the basis of their masculinity in a way that intersects with a sexist, misogynist, Patriarchal desire to control perceived/forced female identity and the subsequent interpersonal and social ramifications that come alongside that systemic abuse.

Focus, intention, and clarity of purpose.

---

I do want to add that there is absolutely something to be said about the fact that these conversations are all extremely White at the moment.

Radical Feminism is a deeply White (and White Supremacist) movement. Conversations on Trans Feminist theory in general are still deeply White as well. Julia Serano is very much a White Trans Feminist, and as such most responses to her work by other White trans people tend to be, well, very White.

I myself am even contributing to the prevalence of Whiteness in the conversation because even though I am Ashkenazi I am also still White. I might be informed by and am actively using concepts formed by Black Women and Ethnic Minority Women as the basis of my own theories, but that doesn't erase the context of my own race in this conversation either.

I really do not want that to be lost upon people, especially other White people. A racialized context matters in this conversation because Race and Gender really cannot be fully separated from each other in conversations about power and systemic oppression.

Bonus TL;DR - Read The Will to Change and Feminism is for Everybody by bell hooks. Read Audre Lorde. Read Kimberlé Crenshaw. Read Leslie Feinberg and Judith Butler. Read María Lugones. Learn the concepts they are presenting and then also learn how to apply those concepts in a consciousness and self aware manner.

[ideasarestuckinmyhead]

Hello can I request a auron hc, were Rook,Auron and Faust are at the mall and a lady (cough Karan cough) yells at Faust and rook yells at them and auron is just in the back smiling, and when they leave rook says "Don't talk to me or my child ever again" and leaves with the boys

Don't speak to me or my child.

A nice day right? Yeah no Faust had a fight with Star and since he's basically Rook's brother in law they decided to take him shopping. Auron was dragged along.

As Rook and Faust were trying to go into a store a older lady said something about Faust's outfit

Rook was about to say something but Faust didn't want to deal with a Karen and just went into he store.

Rook while chatting to Auron about something Faust went to check some crop tops and the Karen came back to yell at him

Some slurs were thrown and Rook was livid. They stalked over there and started to verbally rip the woman apart.

Auron was 100% being them while they were yelling at this Karen daring her to try and get physical with his partner.

Rook: AND DONT EVER TALK TO ME OR MY CHILD AGAIN YOU FUCKING BITCH!

Auron lowkey got turned on seeing Rook degrade someone.

When the Karen tried to say something Security came over and escorted her out.

Rook was fuming saying how they wanted to tear that butch a new one in court when Faust asked them

Do you see me as your kid?

Rook blinked and shrugged it just seemed right to say in the moment

Feeling lowkey that Faust would wonder how Auron and Rook be like if they were his parents or even then as parents in general.

Auron also was slowly calming down Rook since they were still saying shit about the Karen.

He took them om a shopping spree to calm them since he felt proud that they stood up for Faust when he got cornered like that.

Let's also say that lady lost her job a hour later and got her car missing.

He may not like Faust all the time but that's still his younger brother.

Auron can't help but want to see Rook demolish more people in a verbal argument....

[hirik0]

Not a mamas boy anymore

Graves standing up to his controlling mother

Cw: use of the f slur

Graves never thought when he joined the US military with 18 it would mean it will shatter the picture he has of his mother one day. The resentment slowly build up with tine, because squad mates poked around asked question and often lookend horrifyed. Slowly bring Graves to the admission that his mother maybe is not the lovly southern woman he tought she is. The faithfull day the mask if his mother shattered in front if his eyes was a right after Easter. To the displeasure of his mother the phone ringed while they had breakfast, to call him back to base because of an emergency and of all people fellow Sergeant Daniel 'Jocker' Brown is picking him up. Jocker never talked nice about his family down in Texas, so hes more suprised to learn the other Sergeant only is a 2 hours drive away. After a 10 minutes disgusion with his Mother Elisabeth Graves about if he really has to go Yes he is promising to call more often. He really tried to call at often as posible but with missions and time zones it is hard to find the time. At least she stoped asking if he found a wife yet, after he asked her where on the battelfield hes supost to do that. He is now in his childhood room with his christian rock band posters that dont give him a nice nostalgic feeling just bitterness over been grounded for a long time and a lecture how rock music is demonic and him letting the devil in his heart. After that winning fights were just not worth it, atleast his father didn't got mad and beaten him what was a rare event and the only time he didn't got beat for making his mother cry. Because they were told that they likely are called back he luckily didn't unpack most of his travel bag so packing only took him maybe 10 minutes. He carries the bag down the stairs putting it next to the door so that hopefully Jocker and his mom will have as less interaction as possible, because with out even knowing his mother Jocker says pretty bad things about her, like shes a tow faced heck. His mother is loved by everyone in their church or atleast he thought that for a long time, but Jocker while they were in Iraq slowly was able to point out the cracks in his mother's act of being a lovely southern woman. They honestly don't have the time for Jocker having a disagreement with his mother from how urgent the call was. "Phillip, sweety can you help you father in the garden I will call you when whoever is picking you up is here", his mother asks orders him, so he goes out to help, against the feeling that his mind is screaming that will end really bad.

Jocker arrives 30 Minutes later, sitting in the car taking a deap breath. He will just pick up Phil and he will not be projecting the his feelings he has for his own grandmother on to Mrs. Graves, even if he convinced this two woman could be the same person. He gets out the car instantly spoted by all the people taking care of their front yards, great he also has a audience now, if things go south. He walks up the front porch and is ringing the bell. Mrs Graves don't even smiles when she opens the door clearly displeased with her only son leaving again. "Good morning Mrs. Graves I'm here to pick up Phil", Jocker says trying his best to not be pessimistic about how this will went down. His skin crawls from Mrs Graves looking him over as to make sure she can allowhim to take her son with him. The way she presses her lips together and the smile turn fake he did not own her aproval. "They let fagots serve now?"Mrs. Graves is the very first thing says, having Jocker frown confused till he rembers that his niece begged him to paint his nails. "Are you also telling me I'm going yo hell?", Jocker asks unintressed really he just want to pick up his fellow Sergeant. "Well clearly you already know you go there for being a sick pervert so I don't have to." Mrs Graves is giving him her best fake smile but the disgust is bleeding throughher white theet. "I will not enjoy seeing you there." This response clearly hit a big nerve because the smile freezes till it turns in to pure hatred. Unbeknown to Mrs. Graves her son is just re-entering the house. "You're lucky that you are not living here, because in a small town like this, we know exactly what to do with people like you. Dirty fagots are not welcome here and you're a disgrace to the all the brave men serving in the military and I will make sure to get you away from my son, because he should not have to work an abomination to god, like you." Graves jaw is on the floor he never heared his mother talk to anyone like this before. He frezzes, wanting to speak up wanting to just get out of here. It also hurts, it's like a part of his heart is breaking of, his inner child desperately clinging to the picture he has from his mother, while the angry teenager is shattering it in a thousand littel pieces with a bat. "Yes please tell our Captain what a horrible person I am letting my very ill 7 year old niece paint my nails blue, really unacceptable behaivor of me." And Jocker for sure said this loud enough for the older lady that is just predenting to water her plants is hearing him, and the older man that stoped trimming his bushes the moment the word fagot was used. "Well its clearly a punishment of God your niece is that sick", Mrs Graves response the shocked gasp from the neighbour next door audible and Graves he is turning angry at this, how can his mother just say something like this over a 7 year old. Phillip's inner child is crying by now, because if she say this about a child she doesn't know what did she say about him.

Logically Graves knows that Jocker can handel this himself, but he has to say something, show his team mate he dont think this is acceptable, that he is not like that. "Mother, how dare you say something like this about a 7 year old girl?", Phillip asks shocked having struggel to not raise his voice. "Phillip", his mother gasp and a "I wait at the car", from Jocker who is getting the fuck away from what ever will happen next. Thousands of tiny pyzzel pieces are falling in to place in Graves memoriesthat made no dence till now. "I, I , yo...you need to understand", Elizabeth stammers struggels to find away to not look like the bad guy. "No, I understand because I heared enough of what ever conversation you had with Jocker. I honestly understand a lot now, why some of the people in church are afrait of you, why people predent they don't know you that well when they were in your close circel for years and why your friend circel is constanly changing." Graves voice is calm but his hands are trembling in rage, his emotions are totally out of control to many big feelings and so few space in his body for them. Anger making his blood boil, grieve turning his stomach in a rock, hurt making his chest arch. "He's a fagot Phillip, he's a abomination to the bible.", his mother trys to defend herself despreate trying to get her son back on her site, just making Phillip's blood boil even more. "First if all he's not gay, Mom, second this has nothing to do with the stupid bible but with your small minded views and", Graves didn't even notices how he's getting louder and louder while his voice turns ice cold he grabs his back walks past his mother out of the house, "and with out Jocker I would have returned in a fucking body bag so maybe be atleast a littel bit thankfull!" The last part is screamed and the whole street is hearing him at this point. Mrs Graves is frezzing having no idea what to do how to get the control back. "Phillip he started this." With this Phillip is exploding. "No I'm pretty sure he didn't because compared to you he knows how to be a decent human. For fucks sack Mom this behaivor is the reason that Claire and Judy don't talk to you and you will never see your grandkids or can have a friend for more then 4 years. You're a judgmental asshole and people don't want to be around you more then necessary. The only think that matters to you is you and your overblown ego. Fuck I had to apologise to all my ex girlfriends because you bullied them so bad, after you pressured me into dating them in the first place!" 15 years of bottled up emotions are breaking at the same time, the whole neighbourhood is pretending to be busy on the front porch to not miss the show, some even on the phone with church members that live in other part of the city so they are not missing what is happening. Phillip Graves standing up to his mother will not leave the rumor mille for months, probaly years. Jocker starts the car opens the door at the passenger site so they can leave the moment Graves is done with airing his family's dirty air. Because he has nothing else to say he's storming towards the car he needs to get the fuck away from here.

[this-is-exorsexism]

i usually hate the agab terms but so people can better understand what i mean i'll use it here. sorry for the rant in advance, i just have no real place to drop this, as i will mention in the text, so i'm turning to this account:

i'm an afab agender transmasc guy (i mostly have no gender but also feel strongly connected to trans guys- sometimes little, sometimes strongly) who loves presenting & being 'feminine' (mostly clothes & make-up) and i do not feel like i belong anywhere in trans spaces because of that. i do not really have body dysphoria unless people INISIST i am a woman/girl for having wide hips, breasts and a uterus, etc. i love my body the way it is and don't want to medically transition at all, except maybe microdosing T- and thus i feel unwelcome in a lot of transmasc spaces- esp trans men spaces. a lot of transmasc blogs are just for trans men or for people who want to escape femininity at all costs and i feel like im just a "pretender" in these spaces because of all this (missing body dysphoria, not wanting to really transition, loving femininity, etc) and im always afraid of sharing my experiences on said blogs because of potential backlash- i feel like i have no real place to ask for advice or vent since of all of these factors. same for falling under the non-binary umbrella. since i am afab and dress feminine and dont want to really transition or be androgynous, and because i am fat i feel like i dont belong here either. people will tell me "im basically just a girl" , im not trying hard enough, im appropriating labels/experiences or the infamous theyf** slur because of that. agender spaces are the ones im most comfy in since not having a gender means no requirements in the community- but for being transmasc/partially a trans guy & being enby theres always requirements and ""rules"" and it sucks hard. im having a constant gender crisis because of this because im afraid i am just a pretender. i am also gay (if i experience attraction) and i feel like im infiltrating "mlm" spaces because of this. gay is the ONLY label that fits me, and i would go lenghts to be able to use it. i would undergo top & bottom surgery to be seen as "a proper guy" to use it- but i really dont want to at all. that would be forcing myself to conform to other people's expectations. when you're not the "right kind" of trans and/or enby you feel like an alien in spaces that were meant for people like you and it's frustrating to say the least. i feel like i am what transphobes call "transtre*nders" at this point. sorry again for this. feel free to ignore if this doesn't fit here or the accounts purpose- im not sure if this counts as exorsexism.

this is exorsexism.

[chaifootsteps]

y'know, im usually against using screenshot of people doing bad stuff in the past to "prove" that they are bad people nowdays; for example, when they try to get some youtuber cancelled because he said a slur 6 years ago or something.

Because that just negates the fact that us humans commit a lot mistakes, sometimes we do mean stuff, but that doesnt make us terrible humans that are incapable of redeming themseves, most of us grow out of those ugly behaviours, and learn to be decent human beings.

However, with miss Vivziepop its a different story, i like the fact that that we are still finding screenshot of her doing heinous things in the past, for 3 important reasons:

First, The things she did are like, actually really bad.

Its not like most cases where its like "omg this dud said the n-word when he was 12 and didnt know what a slur was! We must cancell him!1!", no, the things Vivziepop did are always when she was a grown ass woman that know what she was doing, she was just being evil.

And then you have her fans insisting those arent "that bad", thats its "a nothing burger", etc. And like, yeah, they ARE bad, those things are really mean and people arent evil for pinting it out.

It is important for growing up to reconise that our past behaviours were not good, thats how we learn better.

Defending a stranger on the internet will just lead you to repeat those behaviours of your idol because you conviced yourself those arent "that bad", until you do them and then you get hit with reality because, thanks to those behaviours, people dont like you anymore and see you as a rude toxic person.

Second, she proved many times she NEVER changed.

She still shows those gross behaviours, unlike most people she never learned to be a better person.

For example: that catcalling comic was made years ago, so, i guess it doesnt represent her views anymore, right? She is no longer misogynist, right?

Well, the way she treats her female characters, plus how she gets mad at people pointing out how badly written they are, proves she never stoped having those mean ideas about women.

Or how about those aboit how she was shaming a fan for not paying her what she wanted and making them feel bad for it? Obviously she grew up and never did something so mean like that again...

Oh wait! No she didnt, every once in a while we see her throwing a fissy fit about people criticising her work and liking tweets of her fans saying people are EVIL for not loving her and giving her all the support in the world.

And about those abuse allegations... wait, those are not even old, most of them are from less than a year ago. You cant even "those were years ago" out of this one.

So fuck the "those were long time ago, she changed!", thats total bs.

And finally, every time she responded or "apologised" for these acusations, she keep proving that she didnt belive she did anything wrong and its just "the haters" being mean.

Anybody remember when she made a weird ass apology that started with "i would apologise for existing, but i know people would get mad at me still"? Her responses are always full of "actually, YOU are the mean one for calling me out, look how bad i feel? Dont you feel any shame?".

One day she will def make a shitty youtube apology video where she admits everything but with the classic "i was in a bad place", "i didnt know what i was doing", basically painting everything as "just a mistake" and not her being an evil asshole. Then half of the video will be her ranting about how this whole situation that SHE created is making HER sad, she will probably said something like "i just wanted to make cartoons and people are being mean :(((" to victimise herself.

Mark my words, we will have a Vivziepop ukelele apology in any day of 2024, im really sure.

All I can say is that after everything she's put people through, she'd better have a damn ukulele.

[sacrificialsam]

the way sam is the only female coded character in existence and the only proof we actually need is the audience reaction!!! drives me crazy! the one time i like a male character and he gets treated like a female one like not even just by people that dont like him and say hes whiny and a bitch but like he also gets the "female character is too smart to join in the boys fun" treatment in fic by people who supposedly DO like him!! why is he getting the girlboss treatment?

also dean calls him a bitch fully seriously in an argument like not in a "oh your acting like a woman" way that people call men bitches but in the fully serious like calling a woman a bitch way. i cant explain it but there is a difference and sam got women treatment in that scene (theyre arguing about dean killing amy if you cant remember the moment)

its just so unusual to me to see a male character get this treatment. its so weird to see

no you're so real anon. i primarily focused on the treatment he gets from male fans of the show because they literally act like anything but servitude or submissiveness towards dean and his actions is a moral failing, which is just like how sexist men expect women to act toward their fathers/ husbands/ male authorities at all times. and it's crazy! but i've seen the more 'benevolent' or girlbossy types of misogyny against him too; i actually made a post about a related phenomena a while back. when sam gets called a woman some people use that to separate him from the 'regular' male characters and elevate him to this infallible bystander status, which of course makes him harder to relate to, less humanized. which is not to say i haven't seen some less savory interpretations from sam fans too, though the misogyny was intended there i'm assuming, for example ones were gets targeted sexually for being 'feminine' by predatory men or entities like azazel. and that's ignoring the fandom in general being rife with misogyny, this is all focused on a character who, going by the source material, is a cis man. what not having a female main character does to you for real.

and yeah dean, and the show as a whole, absolutely try to feminize sam as another way to degrade or victimize him. comments like you're a red headed woman, the ghost goes after chicks, hell even all the jokes about possessions, or the ones straight up alluding to rape (having a girl inside you, teen pregnancy, made you my bitch), all draw from this idea that sam is very womanly and that's the reason bad things happen to him or why he deserves to be made fun of.

as for the fight, i'm assuming you mean this from 7x07?

i agree the bitch comes off as weird here, dean is playing into the 'woman too irrational to make decisions for herself' stereotype, and tries to convince sam that his choice was the moral one because it comes from a less emotional/ irrational place. and like i said before, dean's decision making is not to be challenged with how the show is framed, which makes misogynistic slurs against sam always feel more targeted.

anyway i agree that it's weird but it's also very fascinating to me. hope this still makes sense because it got a bit long. thank you for the ask.

[royalsy-queen]

Hello! I know you were asking op on that post, but I thought I'd offer the way I've anaylzed it over time and good points I've seen others make for you to see if it helps! I personally think will would be way more ready to bottom by the time he gets with mike. he's known how he feels for so long, and with that acceptance comes considering your preferences - especially as a horny teenager. me personally when I watch the show, nothing about will screams "yes I want to do that to mike", I think he leans towards "I wish mike would do this to me". I know some people like subverted expectations, and some fics explore it and shape that opinion, but I don't give that much weight because I prefer looking at the show! there's nothing wrong if there's an obvious choice yk?

There's also the fact mike for most of his life thought he'd be with a woman - aka giving during intimate times. he'd be more prepared for that and probably even itching/excited for exactly that sensation, which is lucky will is prepared for the opposite! And sure, some would say "well once he realizes he's not sleeping with a girl he'll want to do the opposite role!", no, I think given the time period he'll have a mental hurdle, and that's why will goes hell yeah don't even worry!

to use your words about mike being shaky and nervous - i agree and think that's why he wouldn't bottom at the start, there's more going on with that which is where me saying will is more prepared physically and mentally came from :)

And while he's still nice and soft, but not entirely shy anymore, I dont know if will is a total "take the reins" type either. In fact, I like helping people understand he can actually take the reins with mike's nerves, while receiving! it's easier for him to soothe mike by telling him he's okay. I think it'd be more stressful for mike who's had less time with his sexuality to immediately receive and learn how to prep etc. Op acknowledged in their post that will was bottoming and they had the right idea - mike would be so nervous (both would) but that's why it works with Will trusting him and is so sweet, mike's the perfect gentle boyfriend. Nobody is being babied, and Will doesn't need to prove that he isn't a baby through anyone insisting that he top. Will gets a lot of control over his experiences from the bottom too.

I see them switching eventually like you do, but I think I still see mike preferring to top and will preferring to bottom mostly. I personally dont find the desire to flip everything about mike and will that's established (for eg. mike happily protects will so it must mean it's turn for will to do it for mike etc) which I think people sometimes do in terms of their sexual life too.

actually I think people do that because they get worried they're stereotyping? especially with Will which... your not guys and it's okay even if sometimes it happens. like Will receiving during sex. nothing wrong with a stereotype at all! (Unrelated completely but this is also me sorta hoping people start embracing the fact will is gender non conforming in general one day, it's not stereotyping him when he is visibly gay!)

Sorry I word vomited here, I just enjoy discussing this! hope it wasn't too crazy or that i overstepped! ^-^

Hey! Thanks for sharing your thoughts! I see your points and honestly they make so much sense lmao. I'm pretty sure Will has known about his sexuality for a long time, considering that Lonnie called him a queer when he was a child and Troy, who I'm assuming he's been bullying the party for a long time sadly, always went for their physical appearances, however with Will he always resorted to slurs about being gay. So yeah, Will has known for longer he was gay and Mike is honestly still processing that about himself, Mike would likely be the top most of the time. About Will "taking the reins", I actually meant it the same way you described! Will would be bottom but knowing Mike's probably so nervous he would gently guide him through the whole thing, telling Mike what he likes and what he doesn't, what feels good and reassuring him that he's okay and he can keep going most of the time, because like the headcanon said Mike would be the type to stop every 5 seconds to ask if he should continue lol. About the switch, I think it wouldn't happen until further down in their relationship, Mike always has been top but there's this itching curiosity of what it feels like to be "the girl" and to see a Will a bit more dominant than usual 👀

Personally I have even MORE headcanons about these two that are WAY more explicit, because I am a horny bitch lmaoooo

Thanks for sharing your thought process and don't worry, you didn't overstep anything. I enjoy word vomiting about Byler with people on the internet XD