#I like do not think Dean understands what Hell has done to Sam much. though he often benefits from it <333333

[suncaptor]

It is actually kind of insane that Dean probably knows an incredible amount of details of Sam's entire life and then Hell happens and that's like more than Dean will ever know of him and Dean's like. relatively just. in the dark.

[hexedwinchester]

Why Being Manipulated into Letting Gadreel in a Huge Deal for Sam?

I know a lot of Dean Girls were very upset (and will be upset after reading this post) with Sam when Dean asked him if the roles were reversed if he would have done the same thing (letting an angel possess him to save his life). Sam simply says no! Some fans have gone to the extent of calling him selfish but no, Sam is not being selfish in that scene. It wasn't that he didn't care about his brother. He really does and that is why him saying no is actually a good thing.

Now see, Dean never had to go through the whole loss of bodily autonomy due to a possession issue (not until after he was possessed by Michael but that's way after the Gadreel plot) like Sam has been and disturbingly a lot more number of times than Dean's single rodeo with Otherworld Michael (or is it AU Michael? whatever!). Just to keep the argument simple, I am purely focusing on the loss of bodily autonomy purely from a possession POV.

When Meg possessed Sam in S2, she used his body to kill other hunters, to assault Jo and to beat Dean. Maybe she did a lot worse than that, we don't know. Who is left with the trauma of that knowledge? Sam!

The Gary-Sam body swap. This one though seems funny on the surface, it's actually kinda disturbing because Gary used Sam's body to have sex and the kid. Kinda gross enough already but that dumb kid could have easily handed over the vessel to Lucifer. Imagine, that's how it played and Sam was back into his body. Now who is trapped with Lucifer, the Devil? Sam!

Speaking of, understandably saying yes to Lucifer was Sam's call to put him back in the box but it didn't go down without blood on his hand. The moment Lucifer took control of Sam's body, he killed the demons from Sam's life that deceived him. I am guessing these were possessed people he killed in the process and not just wisps of black smoke. At Stull cemetery, he exploded Cas to bits, snapped Bobby's neck and beat up Dean to pulp! all by whose hands? Sam's!

Gadreel's possession did help Sam get better but at what cost? Kevin's death? How many nightmares did Sam have seeing his hands burning Kevin hollow? Now let me point out the aftermath of this possession which is somehow even worse than the actual possession: Crowley skewered Sam's brains with needles, hell, he even possessed Sam to wake him as if one possession was not enough. Sam literally had two supernatural beings possessing him at one time! Don't even get me started on the painful, torturous grace extraction process. Sam was willing to die in that moment because he believed his life wasn't worth saving, definitely not at the cost of Kevin's life!

Before this role reversal scene, Dean wasn't possessed by anything, so he doesn't understand how horrible it is to lose autonomy over one's mind and body. I don't expect him to grasp the gravity of it. He sees it as a healing from within. For him, if 'ends justifying the means' that's all that matters.

When every single possession has caused nothing but grave trauma to Sam Winchester, tell me why would he or anyone for that matter, in their sane heads do this on their own brother, especially when they love them so much?

Here's another very real life perspective for all those who feel Sam saying 'no' if the situation was reversed was a horrible betrayal and proof that he doesn't love Dean enough: Ever had someone you love on life support or gone through a situation where you had to put down your beloved pet? Why do we do this? is it because we don't love them? because we don't care? no! Because sometimes, it is better to let them go than to prolong their suffering by putting them through this pain. So next time you feel Sam was being selfish, or disloyal to Dean or that he didn't care enough, think about a loved one suffering through something horrible because you didn't have the guts to let go!

[samofmine]

thank you anon i had a wonderful time writing this

Sam is Dean's. One way or another, that's pretty much the only thing Dean is certain of now.

Now.

It hasn't always been like this.

Back when they were younger, Dean was always anxious, always worried Sam would leave him one day. He was too different, too silent, too much in his own little world and as much as Dean prouded himself in being the only person Sam would allow to enter his world, he also knew one day this would change and he'd be locked out forever.

So it wasn't much of a surprise when he announced he was going to leave. Stanford.

But even though he saw it coming, it still felt like something died inside of him, a light going out.

And later when they eventually found their way to each other, Dean was certain Sam would leave again. He never wanted the life, never wanted to be part of a fucked up family. He wanted to be normal.

Now, Dean knows Sam has forgotten about that. He finally understands he's never gonna be normal.

Most importantly, he understands Dean is as much of a freak as he is. They're in this together for life.

And, yes, Dean knows Sam is his. In every way he wants him.

This... Thing between them, the thing Dean never knows how to name, has only started a couple years ago. Yes, Dean still feels a longing for his brother rooted deep inside his chest that will never go away, even when Sam is in his arms, moaning his name, panting against his lips, he still longs for him. He thinks this is the result of all the years they lost trying to fight against... this.

Last night, they were bored out of their minds and decided to get hammered together, like they hadn't done in a long time.

Dean loves to see Sam drunk, loves how easily he laughs, how carefree he seems. They could talk about anything and laugh it off.

So, these are the only moments Sam really talks about his time in Stanford. Dean doesn't complain, really, talking about that time only makes the longing grow inside him, but he can handle it from time to time.

Yesterday Sam started to list the people he hooked up with while at college.

At first, Dean was laughing it off.

But then he mentioned someone. A guy.

Dean doesn't care to remember his name. But he does remember what Sam said about him.

The guy was the first one to fuck him.

Sam lost his virginity to a college no-name boy.

And Dean couldn't laugh about that even if he tried.

Which brings him to where he is now.

He found a spell in one of Rowena's books and spent the entire day getting things ready. If it all goes according to plan, Dean will go back in time.

He will reclaim what's his.

He finishes drinking the purple, oddly glowing liquid that tastes like metal and cheap grape juice and says the magic words.

He feels dizzy at first, like he lost consciousness for half a second and came back, and when he realizes... It worked.

Hell yes. Now he has to go find Sammy.

-

Sam is in bed, it's been an overwhemingly long day with too much to do and he really needs to rest.

But, of course, not even this goes according to plan.

He hears a loud noise coming from the apartment's kitchen and jumps out of bed.

He's terrified, hands shaking, and a million thoughts run through his head as he tries to remember what he should do. What he was taught.

He enters the kitchen with a baseball bat in hand, but, before he can see anything someone tackles him to the floor.

His eyes finally adjust to the darkness and he sees him - Dean.

"Easy, tiger!" He says.

Sam frowns.

"Get off me!"

Sam frees himself from Dean and walks to the light switch.

Now, with the lights on, he can see the boy - well, the man - clearly.

It's him, but it's not him as Sam remembers him.

"What the hell?"

"Missed you too, little brother." Dean smirks.

"How the- You-" Sam blinks, trying to gather his thoughts.

Did he fall asleep? Is he dreaming?

What kind of a weird ass dream is this? An old version of Dean breaking into his apartment?

As he thinks, Dean starts going through the kitchen's fridge, grabbing two bottles of beer.

"When you're done freaking out," Dean says, walking to the living room, "Come have a drink with me."

Sam takes another five minutes before he gets himself to follow Dean.

Dean explains everything to him. He explains how he came from the future. How Sam left Stanford, for a reason he won't mention, and they're together a few years from now.

Sam sips on his beer, feeling dizzy.

"But- why? Why would you come here talk to me?"

Dean's eyes darken.

"I know a secret of yours, Sammy."

Dean's voice is so different, even deeper than it already was. His eyes are still a green that seems to spark like a gemstone, and the crinkles by it only make him more good looking.

So, Future Sam probably still hasn't gotten over his crush.

"What secret?" He asks skeptically.

Dean smirks and scoots closer to him, throwing an arm around his shoulder.

He leans in to whisper on his ear.

"I know you've been thinking about me. In ways you shouldn't."

Sam widens his eyes and backs away from Dean on reflex.

"W-What?"

Dean's eyes are even darker now and he looks so sure, so confident, it makes Sam shiver.

"I have a secret, too." He says. "Few years from now, we're gonna be all over each other. I can't get enough."

Sam blushes at the words. He swallows dry, thinking of what to say. Dean's hand finds his thigh, traveling up, stopping on his hip.

Dean pulls him closer.

"Tell me, Sammy." He says, "Tell me how much you want me."

Sam takes a deep breath. Dean starts to kiss down his neck, pulling his hair lightly in a way he only now realizes he likes it, and yeah, there's no way this isn't a dream.

Sam lets out a whimper, getting lost in the feeling. He has wanted this for so long, so damn long, and he hated himself for it.

And now, Dean - older Dean, but still Dean - is right here, giving him everything he always wanted and more.

"Dean..." He says, blushing harder over how needy he sounds.

Dean nibbles on his ear.

"I want you, little brother." He says, "Want you so bad."

He turns Sam's face to look at him and Sam gets lost inside his eyes before he leans in, kissing him with so much desperation he feels himself losing his breath.

He straddles Dean's lap and of course Dean holds him, urging him to take his shirt off and attacking his nipples as soon as they're bare. Sam is already a mess, whimpering and gasping and moaning Dean's name, painfully hard in his pants.

Dean's hand touches him through the sweatpants.

"Tell me." Dean demands, and Sam can't even think of not answering.

"Want you." He breathes out. "Always wanted you, Dean. So fucking bad."

That turns a switch inside Dean and he groans, lifting Sam's body and laying him on the couch, taking off his pants and hovering over him as he takes off his own.

Dean steps back and looks at Sam, naked on the couch. Sam feels his entire body burn.

"You're so beautiful." Dean says, closer now, his hand travelling Sam's body with adoration. "So damn hot, made me lose my mind back then. Still does."

He kisses down Sam's torso and oh, finally, he touches Sam's cock, pumping it twice before taking the head in his mouth, eyes locked with Sam's the entire time.

Sam feels like his brain is melting, he can't do much other than whine and moan Dean's name, so he leans back and watches Dean, leaking precum inside his mouth.

When he's getting close, Dean lets his cock go with a pop. He whines louder.

"It's okay, baby brother. I'll make you feel real good."

Dean rubs the head of his cock, squeezes more precum out and coats his finger with it.

Sam knows where this is going.

Dean starts rubbing his fingers against his hole.

Sam lets out a gasp.

"De- Dean!"

"Shhh, it's okay, baby. Let me take care of you."

"No, Dean, I- I never, I mean, I haven't-"

Dean lets out a groan, tip of his finger entering Sam, and Sam shivers at the feeling.

"I know, Sammy." Dean says, "Gonna be your first. Gonna be the first cock you take in your virgin, tight little hole."

Dean's words are dripping with want, hunger even, and Sam all but melts under his touch.

His finger is all the way in now and he's thrusting it in and out, slowly.

"Ask for it, Sammy." Dean says. "Tell me you want me to take your virginity. Tell me you're mine."

Sam feels shivers running down his body as Dean starts to lick his hole while he thrusts his finger, overwhelmed by how gentle he's being.

"Want-" Sam mumbles. "Want you. Want you to be my first. Please, De-"

Dean adds another finger, this one covered with spit, and starts thrusting in harder. Sam feels weird at first, stretching around his brother's fingers, the burning pain too unfamiliar, but then Dean hits something inside him that makes his body jolt with pleasure and Sam hears himself begging for more of this, more of Dean.

Three fingers in and Sam is almost crying, hips moving trying to meet Dean's thrusts, wanting more of that feeling.

Dean takes his fingers out and leans down to kiss Sam, this kiss filled with passion and want and Sam feels the safest and most loved he's ever felt all his life.

"Gonna fuck you now, baby brother."

Dean says, and Sam feels him coming in, stretching him so much more, he feels like he's going to break, but Dean goes slow and kisses him the entire time until he's fully in.

Sam feels so full his body is taken over by an overwhelming bliss.

He wraps his legs around Dean's waist and pants against his mouth.

"Fuck me." He whines.

And oh, Dean does.

He thrusts inside him, slow but increasingly harder, groaning and giving Sam kisses and bites down his neck.

Sam can't put his mind to understand what Dean's saying, but he gets bits and pieces of it, like "So tight, so fucking tight" and "So perfect for me" and "Made for my cock".

Dean starts thrusting harder and Sam's cock is throbbing against his stomach, almost painfully. He reaches to touch it but Dean stops him, grabs his hand and lifts it, holding it on top of his head.

"Please- I need-" Sam whines, Dean hitting the spot inside him hard with every thrust. He feels like he's going insane from the feeling, too overwhelming, too new.

"You can come like this." Dean pants on top of him, "Come on my cock, Sammy."

Sam whines at the words because fuck, this is too much, Dean fucks him even harder and Sam feels it building up inside him, painfully slow with his neglected cock twitching and leaking, and then it hits him. He lets out a broken sob as he comes all over himself and Dean.

"That's it, Sammy. So good, such a good baby brother for me, fuck." Dean fucks him through his orgasm, groaning as Sam clenches around him, and it's not long until he's spilling inside him, warm and deep and Sam whimpers at the feeling.

When Dean pulls out Sam feels incredibly empty, and he grabs Dean's arms and pulls him down towards him, kissing him passionately, like he's still hungry.

Dean's hand finds his cock while they're kissing and Sam flinches, too sensitive, but his cock is twitching on Dean's hand.

He pumps it slowly until Sam is moaning against his mouth.

"That's it. You did so good, came so good just from my cock." Dean praises him, "Gonna make you come again, baby."

Sam is thrusting up in Dean's fist before he realizes and he comes with a scream this time, entire body shaking.

He falls asleep right after, exhausted.

He doesn't see Dean licking him clean afterwards, and he doesn't see Dean kissing his forehead and saying goodbye.

When Sam wakes up, he wonders if it was all a dream, but his body is still sore and he doesn't know how this is possible.

Years later, when he's back on the road with Dean, older Dean's words still haven't left his mind.

"Few years from now, we're gonna be all over each other."

So, Sam waits.

And he knows damn well it will be worth the wait.

[watching-sam-and-dean-again]

Season 7: Deaths Door

So, I’m watching a reactor who just got to this episode. Yes, this is another post based around reaction videos. No it’s not the same one I wrote about last time (if I have any followers who keep track). Yes, I have a reactors on the go currently, and sadly, two of them are on seasons I don’t like much (Season 7 and Season 15), so it’s a bit rough going right now.

Anyway, I think the episode where Bobby dies is a good one, though it is definitely sad. There are quite a few moments that really stand out for me. First, Dean punching the glass when the organ donor guy comes to talk to him while Bobby is still alive is really impactful. You understand and empathize with Dean so hard in that moment, and I think he showed unusual restraint in punching the glass rather than the man. My guy, what the hell are you doing asking someone about organs while their loved one is fighting for their life? Next, Sam pressing on his palm while he tries to wrestle with the reality of Bobby dying is heartbreaking to me. I think this is a moment that some people miss, but it hurts so much while it reminds me that Sam, while he mostly looks okay on the outside, is still dealing with the aftermath of his soul being locked in the cage with Lucifer for 180 years. The guy is struggling with reality on a daily basis, thinks he doesn’t have it so bad just because others experience "worse," and is now losing his surrogate dad. Finally, Bobby's memories of the boys being just totally average little moments of them acting like typical brothers is very wholesome. Though, I enjoy all of Bobby’s memories (Rufus!) and what they show us about Bobby. Really good episode overall.

Now, here is where my … problem (I guess I’ll go with that term) comes in. I like this reactor because they are entertaining, and they tend to try look at things from both brothers' points of view most of the time, but they said two things that irked me a bit while watching the episode, especially because they seem to be opinions shared by a lot of viewers. Obviously opinions are going to be subjective, so I don’t think this reactor is being unfair. I just don’t fully agree. First, they said that they feel especially bad for Dean in this episode because he has been through so much. Second, they suggest that Bobby's death might be harder on the boys because Bobby was more of a father to them than John was.

Please see my thought under the cut

So, tackling the first idea, I don’t object to feeling bad for Dean this season or the idea that he has been through too mich. At all. I object to the implied idea that he has somehow been through more or worse than Sam at this point in the show, and thus deserves more sympathy. Excuse me, but, what!? Let’s not delve all the way back through their history because that could go on forever, instead let’s just look at Season 6 and Season 7 (up to this point).

Let’s start with Dean. He experienced the pain of having a soulless Sam back, who didn’t particularly care about him. This is essentially one of his worst nightmares, so I understand him reeling from this for a while. He gained and lost a family, and picked up a heap more loss and guilt to deal with from leaving them. He was betrayed by his "best friend," who also hurt his brother just to stop Dean from interfering with his purgatory plan. He has to "deal with" Sam suffering from hallucinations. He broke a leg. He’s had to temporarily give up his baby. And now Bobby, his surrogate dad, is dying. These are all very hard things, and I truly feel bad for Dean having to go through them, but he’s also done things to add to his own misery this season, like kill Amy and lie to Sam about it and drink his face off instead of coping with his depression and guilt. Dean is his own worst enemy, and it sometimes affects the empathy I have for him.

Now, let’s look at Sam. Since Season 6, Sam has to come to terms with the fact that while he was soulless he did absolutely terrible things, things that he has to now remember and live with, even though in his normal state he never would have done them. He was also betrayed by Cas. First, Cas brought him back soulless, and while I don’t think he knew what exactly was wrong with Sam, he knew something was off and then proceeded to ignore Sam when he reached out to him about it. Then, he betrayed him by breaking his hell-wall just to distract Dean; he risked destroying Sam's mind entirely just to get Dean out of his way. Now, Sam is the one who is actually suffering from hallucinations, which have never gone away up to this point, rather he just learns to distinguish them from reality and go about his business. The show doesn’t remind us of this constantly, so I kind of understand audiences not actively thinking about this. Still, what Sam is experiencing in Season 7 is horrific. On top of all this, he’s worrying about Dean because of his drinking and depression. And now he too is losing Bobby, and he didn’t even have a sweet one-on-one memory to fall back on with Bobby unless he did and it just wasn’t significant enough for Bobby to remember. While Cas' betrayal probably hurt Dean more because Cas was closer to him at this point, what he did still has to hurt Sam, too; it even made him wonder if Cas brought him back soulless on purpose.

Now, my whole point with this is not that people should feel worse for Sam than Dean, but that it seems crazy to me to feel more empathy for Dean than Sam at this point. Dean has to worry about Sam's mental state, but Sam is the one living it. Meanwhile, Sam is worried about Dean's mental state, which is poor partially because of what’s happening with Sam these codependent boys have both been through way too much in the last Season and a half alone. Just because Sam isn’t as demonstrative with his emotions as Dean a lot of the time doesn’t mean he isn’t also in pain. So, I empathize strong,y with both of them in this situation of losing Bobby on top of everything else.

Finally, the idea that Bobby is Sam and Dean "real" dad is one I always take issue with. John is not perfect by any means, but he did love his sons. He literally sold his soul to save Dean. This is not nothing. Dean has fond memories of him, and Sam had a nice moment with him and laughed with him in "Dead Man's Blood." When John first sees his boys after months (years for Sam) apart, he hugs them both. This is not a dad who doesn’t love his kids. His harshness was a result of fear for the boys most of the time, not unlike how Dean treated Ben when he was worried about him and Lisa at the end of Season 6. I’m not saying this is right, or that he couldn’t be too harsh, but they are living extraordinary experiences. John raised his kids like soldiers, but if he hadn’t they’d probably have died sooner. And the fact that they called him Sir, didn’t mean that he was only a Drill Sargent to them. Moreover, even though John made a ton of mistakes, his death was absolutely devastating for both Sam and Dean. Bobby on the other hand, may have "adopted two boys" in his heart, but he wasn’t perfect either. He’s been harsh with both of them at times, sometimes fairly, other times not as fairly, and he clearly has a favorite, which isn’t ideal in a father figure. Yes, he brought Dean to play catch, but an uncle might do that too, and did he ever do something like that for Sam? I like Bobby, I really do, and I think he’s a good surrogate but he is not their "real" dad, either. And while a terrible blow, I don’t think his death has equal impact on the boys to John’s.

Anyway, that’s it on this one. Thanks for reading, if you made it this far.

What are your thought any of this?

[soullessjack]

The cw walks up to you personally and tells you that they ARE going to be making supernatural season 16. Its going to be a complete retcon of season 15 and they want to give YOU complete creative control over Jack's arc including crucial plot moments and relationships with other characters. What would you change?

i wanted to save this for a Right Time when i could be super organized and detailed and big-wordy but fuck it . we’ll do it weird.

Crucial Plot Moments

I have so many posts on all of the loose ends in Jack’s storylines this’ll be an easy one. also, so much of this would realistically bank on a total rewrite of S15’s pacing but we don’t have time for all that.

for starters, there would be way more to show of the aftermath of soulless jack. all of his actions were in public, primarily on people of a high status (college professors, religious leaders), and even televised on the news. unless the assumption is that chuck erased everyone’s memory after undoing jack’s global mind control, he should be recognized all around from what he did. he does still canonically have an active FBI file marking him as armed and dangerous, too, so there should be more police/federal presence in the ongoing investigation, and it should also attract a whole slew of hunters (think the fanatics from Black Rock), especially the crew Bobby says is put together to hunt jack but never shows up.

this could also fall under relationships, but we absolutely need closure for Jack’s grandparents, Hellen and Jack Kline Sr. the first time we/Jack meets them, he lies and says he’s a coworker of hers, but vaguely confirms that she had a baby who loves her very much and that she was an amazing mom. he’s very visibly holding back tears to see his family—his grandfather is also his namesake, remember—and to know that he “coincidentally” looks like his mother. he ultimately went to see them to give them closure and so he could connect more with Kelly after her death. the second and last time we see them, jack is visiting to find familial connection again after Sam and Dean “rejected” him. he’s forcing himself to look normal and calm, but is still extremely unstable and psychotic, and it shows when his irritation at Hellen’s causes his powers to ‘activate’ more easily—which unfortunately winds up revealing his nature to them and terrifying them.

although the cutoff is literally meant to make us wonder DID JACK KILL HIS GRANDPARENTS!?, it’s eventually shown that he just left, and that he was also accused of killing Kelly, his own mother, by his own grandmother. The Klines never show up again afterwards and there isn’t even a suggestion that he sees them again or tells them the truth at some point offscreen. I don’t know exactly how it would go if he did, though; i think there’s too many directions to narrow down to The Right One, like.. if he did tell them the truth, would they accept him? would they still blame him for Kelly’s death if they knew the actual circumstances of it?

as a side note, almost all of Jack’s major plot points revolve around his relationship to someone else lol.

Rowena; he literally kidnaps her, she’s aware that he’s psychotic but trying to fix what he did / that it was an accident, and she has her own experience of grief making her violent when she tried to bring Crowley back. she’s never seen again until after jack dies and only ever has a silent sad reaction to learning about his death in the beginning S15. then she dies, becomes the Queen of Hell, and they never interact again. I am 100% giving them closure.

DEAN AND JACK. Holy shit. MY GUYS. MY SLIMES. Their relationship is literally so complicated and insane and real and it’s constantly done so shittily in the show and in the fandom bc nobody understands them the right way. I cannot stress enough how much I hate that people’s idea of them resolving their conflict post-Mary is to just infantilize Jack so Dean can’t be mad at him anymore WHEN HE’S WELL WITHIN REASON TO BE ANGRY. HE IS RELIVING HIS ROOT TRAUMA. It’s so painfully one sided and, as all babyjack does, only serves to make Dean look better without any consideration for Jack as a person or any of his actions.

There were also just generally a LOT of plot holes/loose ends surround Jack bc the writers can never fucking commit to anything when it comes to his character:

Harper (14x06) and Sylvia (15x14(?)) are both characters that Jack is written to either have emotional connections with or relate with them. Sylvia is last seen running off with a demon, I think, and Harper is never seen again after the last shot of her in her car writing a letter to Jack about how in love with him she is, still with the intent to kill him, bc as Yockey put it she’s a “psycho stalker” that Jack is entirely unaware of

(I also personally think there are some small parallels between Sylvia and Jack, like Sylvia being a ‘righteous punisher’ as Jack was under Heaven & both of them dealing with loss and disappointment).

The letter Jack writes in 14x04(?) to all three of his fathers before he plans to run away, before stopping altogether to help the enchanted girl, never gets opened or even acknowledged again.

“making it loud” in the empty after detonating. we literally never get an explanation or a follow-up as to what this means and why its bad and what will happen. presumably it means he woke up every dead angel and demon that’s in the Empty, but we can only presume.

Almost every traumatic experience he has ever endured. We almost never get his actual point of view or a clear focus on it in the show: Apocalypse World, Michael, losing his soul, the security guard in Tombstone, killing Mary and becoming psychotic, being literally suicidal with guilt and estrangement and feeling as if he’s “constantly letting his fathers down.” being struck down and murdered horrifically by his own grandfather, being in the Empty for months to even being Billie’s compliant weapon — all overlooked !!!

I need to finish this post soon because I know it’s been forever since you sent it to me, but as of right now I have a headache so I will wrap it on a sillier note !! For the final touches, I would ensure that

Jack is way more unhinged and spiraling, like 13x02 and 13x06. There are lasting effects of his trauma and everything that has been implied of his character but never fully fleshed out, like his soulless psychosis over Mary and the entire guilt-disappointment-anger arc from S15. See also, every traumatic event he ever experienced.

Jack would also be way more reactive to things, especially the sheer amount of unfairness given to him because of his heritage. AU Bobby quite literally said that the only reason he hadn’t killed Jack on the spot was his humanness, and then did an entire heel turn on it in 14x18.

I don’t think a real solid love interest would be a good addition to SPN but I do think he should kiss a boy or at least have something implied; it just means a lot to me that one of his desired “normal human” experiences was falling in love lmao

More gay little jackets 100%

Have bloodier kills and actually be bloody and fucked up

[eisforeidolon]

So I came across a meta post based on screenshots [X][X] of the list of book titles shown in 4x18 that Chuck published. There's a discrepancy where only 24 titles are given when there are 60 tv episodes across that span. Now not only did the meta author skip right past the possibility that since novels are generally longer than a tv show episode, books might generally cover multiple episodes? As well as the even more likely possibility that whoever was typing up the list for the props department got lazy?

The post directly jumped right into full on stan conspiracy-think of how this must be why all the fans in the SPNverse are Sam girls because Chuck purposefully omitted all of Dean's best episodes! Naturally this gets built on in the replies & comments, with even more conspiratorial leaps about how the writers were trying to make fans in-universe love Sam and think he was a hero because nobody does in the real world (snort) yadda yadda Chuck won theory is true yadda yadda D/C was silenced *sob* yadda yadda the story was writing itself without the permission of the writers writing it [crazy eyes].

My other glaring issue - aside from the obvious of what an absurdly biased load of batshit all of that is? I just do not understand why someone trying to suggest a genuinely legitimate theory about a show spanning fifteen years and many different writers? Wouldn't consider for a hot minute before running full tilt with an idea: Hey, this is one random-ass prop screen from one episode that Sam scrolls by fairly quick, does this actually line up with how much of the story we're shown the in-universe fans getting elsewhere? Spoiler: No.

Let's ignore that Chuck specifically mentions the ghost ship from Red Sky at Morning, which isn't on the list, in that very same episode. He could be getting visions of stories and not writing them - unlikely but possible. No, lets jump to Crowley using the books in Clip Show to track down and kill "everyone [Sam & Dean have] ever saved". He says he's able to do it because he has "his sources and a crack research team" as he's shown with a pile of Chuck's books as he's saying it [X]. It's unlikely he would have found Sarah from Provenance through another source besides the books, but theoretically possible.

What you can't use handwaves to set aside, though? Is that as the scene continues, he holds up a copy of what is clearly A Very Supernatural Christmas [X], which is not on the list. It's shown again as part of Metatron's library in Meta Fiction, along with Tall Tales [X], also not on the list. These are direct in-universe physical books shown onscreen. While we're at it, there are a couple of times fan characters make it clear in dialogue other episodes/books exist. In The Real Ghostbusters, Demian and Barnes walk by Sam and Dean playacting a scene directly from Hunted about John's last order regarding Sam. Same episode, Becky tells them about Crowley getting the Colt from Bela, specifically citing the title of Time is On My Side. Last one, in Fan Fiction, Marie immediately jumps to knowing what a tulpa is and says, "Well, in Hell House, Sam & Dean-". None of those three books are on that list. So that list is NOT a comprehensive one for all the published books in-universe.

Part of me really wants to go on an even more extended rant here about fixating on one blink-and-you'll-miss-it detail and imbuing it with six metric tons of meaning without even once seeming to consider if it's actually remotely significant or, y'know, put in with legitimate intention. Even if the meaning being projected isn't completely bonkers. Seeing this done over and over again by people latching myopically onto whatever random tidbit will let them jump to the conclusions they already want ... sigh. Like, this is not how you come up with a good theory, starting from an utterly rotten base!

[sobbingdistantnoises]

1. 2. 4. for the writing ask?

1. Do you know how you want the story to end when you start, or are you just tumbling through the figurative wilderness hoping to find a road?

100% the latter, I am so bad at endings, which is probably why I don't finish anything D:

With spin wick au, I'm wanting to hopefully actually get an ending for the main plot figured out by thinking without properly writing anything, so...who knows how this will work out. I am still in world building phase for that though :P

I am also thinking of trying to do a silly with Soulless Sam (who I am so normal about by the way. I UNDERSTAND him, I have thought so much about the sort of thought process he follows, it's so great <3) in which rather than a story with proper endings, I do a series of oneshots that portrays elements of how I think he thinks. I think. I have a teensy bit written on a google doc :) Must write more

2. Talk about a notable time a narrative or character has looked you dead in the eyes and said "frick your plan, here's what we're actually doing."

WELL. ABOUT EVERY FREAKING TIME.

Let's talk about Sam goes to Doom hell though, in which, you guessed it, Sam goes to the hell set in Doom! :D I did not have a proper plan for what was going to happen, (this question has actually made me realize that I can totally continue my planning for it and come up with a proper ending since I'm done with s5 and don't feel like extending it through s6), but I had a part in which Sam was killing these zombiemen demons, and then he (thinks he) noticed that, hey, that's a person he just killed. And then that led him to thinking about burying them or whatever else he could do, which then he put their body against a wall with their gun, which then I realized hey, Dean could use that weapon! So now Dean will go to Doom hell too, as part of his end of s2 demon deal :D I did not choose this

Only tangentially related, but I also have a google doc called "Insert Tangoesque Description for the Game! + also my fricking [cyber security competition I did] notes for some reason"

4. What is the plot bunny you've been carrying around for the longest? Do you ever wonder why you haven't written it yet and experience deep existential dread?

OKAY HM. Most of the stuff that haunts me is stuff I've written a teensy bit of, but I am going to say for this question that plot bunnies are stuff you haven't written at all because that gives a more interesting answer that I otherwise would have never given

Word for word the way I have it written down is "The thing in the satanic bible that said you should have your body mutilated if you defile something and it happens to Dave because he's a satanist" (because of course band people destroyed a bunch of furniture in their careers as band people)

I think about it sometimes. It's kind of a terrifying concept, even if it's not like...full on furniture throwing or whatever, because everybody's "hurt" nonliving things by virtue of accident or "they're not alive to feel pain". Hm. Some sort of metaphor for accidentally hurting people because you just didn't think is in here. Insane fic concept though, just randomly getting psychically tortured for sins against table.

I don't quite experience deep existential dread because there are too many fic concepts for that though, and I am too powerful for evil emotions (telling myself this is how I beat them up :D)

[aew-kun-age-regression]

Hi there, hopefully I'll do this request right (never done a request for agere stuff yet so sorry if I'm too descriptive or something!) Was wondering if I could request Caregiver headcanons for Ruby from Supernatural? Preferably if it includes a disabled regressor (wheelchair user) who regresses around 5-10? No problem if that's too complicated though, general headcanons would be fine in that case!

Hiii my lovely!! I love this request! I think your the first person to request something supernatural related and I love it!!! I really hope this is okay as I came up with these ideas during an exam 😂 I tried to do your request as best as I could however I wasn't really able to mention some things all too much so apologies for that <3 I hope you like what I came up with!!

"Caregiver!Supernatural!Ruby Headcannons"

(Winchester reader)

A/N: Okay so this is a specialised request so this is not my traditional headcannons but headcannons for a certain prompt <3

Also please note that there is brief mentions of the Lilith situation

• For this I'm assuming you are also a Winchester.

• So when she meets you she's definitely shocked, she obviously knew your brothers. Every angel, demon, monster new Sam and Dean Winchester however very few people knew about you.

• I feel like Nicknames wise she calls you Hunny or Sweetheart.

• During the time where she found herself helping the boys she done many favours where she looked after you whilst the boys went on hunts. (She definitely wasn't complaining though, she was more than happy to do so.)

• I feel like the main activity the two of you would do is watching TV. She knows a decent amount but she is still a demon who has been in hell for a while so she's not necessarily up to date on everything. You'd introduce her to new movies and shows almost daily and that would be a big part of the bonding between the two of you.

• If you want to move around not in your wheelchair she will just pick you up and walk around with you. Because yes. She cam can that. Perks of being a demon - Super strong <3

• When the whole Lilith situation happened Ruby became really protective knowing that there was all sorts of new monsters roaming around that even your brothers didn't know how to get rid of.

• Lilith originally wanted you to be the one to open the gates, however Ruby couldn't let you do it as she became attached.

• At first Lilith didn't really understand as Ruby is a demon and shouldn't have such feelings and even when she does she shouldn't show it but eventually the two of them came to an agreement and instead Ruby got Sam to do it.

• You were kept away during the gates opening.

[writethelifeyouwant]

Made For You | Chapter 15

Summary: Dean and Sam like what they have together, and if screwing your brother screws with the universe’s “grand plan” while they’re at it, then even better. Neither of them has ever cared much for tradition or fate, but it turns out there are some destinies you can’t escape. Sometimes, someone is just made for you. 

Pairing: Alpha!Dean x Omega!Reader  Rating: 18+ Warnings: Incest Tags: AU, Time Jump, Omegaverse, Alpha!Dean, Omega!Reader, age difference, taboo relationship, scent attraction, true mates, Dean’s self-loathing, Ellen not taking anyone’s bullshit, overprotective father, overprotective alpha, angry angry daughter Bingo Squares:  @spnabobingo - Overprotective Alpha Word Count: 2.3k

Series Masterlist

Dean’s POV

Dean’s head is spinning. The shock of running into Sam after all these years apart is staggering, and it hasn’t gone at all like the countless reunions he used to picture in his head. He hasn’t bothered picturing them for a long time, given up on the possibility of ever seeing his little brother again. Yet here he is, sitting across from him. Except this isn’t the Sammy Dean had known twenty years ago. Hell, Dean isn’t the same person he was twenty years ago either. Twenty years ago he’d been head over heels in love with the man who’s now sitting across from him, even though they’d never really spoken about it like that, in such specific terms. Maybe he should have, Dean thinks with regret. Maybe then Sam wouldn’t have thought that he’d be unwanted, he would have felt safe confiding in Dean and raising their child with him. But he hadn’t, and that was Dean’s fault. 

Dean’s fault that Sam ran away. Dean’s fault that Sam never came back. Dean’s fault that he had to raise their daughter all on his own. Dean’s fault that she’d grown up with a made-up story about who she is, and where she’d come from. Dean’s fault that he hadn’t known who she was when they met, and he’d taken her fucking virginity. And then fucking abandoned her less than seventy-two hours later. God, how has he already surpassed John for ‘worst father of the year’ award when he’s known his daughter for all of a week?

“Dad?” Y/N’s voice brings Dean out of his thoughts, and he finds her staring at Sam with hurt in her eyes. Dean looks at his little brother and sees an unfathomable mix of emotions playing across his face. There’s wrinkles on his forehead that hadn’t been there the last time Dean saw him, and another barb of regret at everything he’s missed stabs at his chest. 

“Yeah?” Sam asks gently, eyes trained on their daughter almost too concertedly as if he’s purposefully avoiding looking at Dean. 

“Is there something wrong with me?” she asks meekly, stealing the barest of glances towards Dean, before darting her eyes back to Sam. 

“What? Sweetie, no,” Sam’s hand jumps forward to grab hers, a show of paternal comfort that looks so natural he must have done that a thousand times, Dean thinks bitterly. And he was never there to offer the same thing. “Why would you think that?”

“Because we–” Y/N breaks off, looking at Dean helplessly. 

“Y/N,” Dean warns with a low voice, shaking his head. 

“Because you thought you and Dean were mates?” Sam asks sympathetically, his hazel eyes flickering to meet Dean’s in a sort of begrudgingly understanding grimace. “No, Y/N that doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you,” he reassures the girl, his attention firmly back on her. “We all get confused sometimes, hormones at your age are overwhelming and unpredictable. There must have been something in you that recognised the family bond that you have. He made you feel safe, and comfortable? Happy?” 

Y/N gives Sam a tiny nod, tears gathering on the rim of her lashes. 

“And you feel all those things with me too, don’t you?” Sam presses on, his voice patient but clearly pleading with her to understand. 

“Of course I do, Dad,” Y/N answers immediately. “But–” 

“Then that’s all it was, baby girl,” Sam interrupts with a sad smile and another squeeze of her hand where it’s resting on the table. Dean thinks he sees Y/N flinch back when Sam calls her ‘baby girl’, probably remembering, just as Dean is, when he had called her that in bed last weekend. “Get up on your hands and knees for me, baby girl. Wanna watch that pretty little cunt stretching around my knot when I fuck you this time.” The memory should make him sick to his stomach, but it only makes his cock twitch in his jeans. Yeah, he’s the goddamn father of the year alright.

“Dean?” Y/N turns to him, struggling to find the words, but Dean knows what it is she’s trying to ask him. It wasn’t just that, right? It was more, you felt it too, didn’t you? You told me you felt it too. But when Dean opens his mouth, he can’t make any answers come out. He doesn’t know what to say to this, how to handle what’s happening. His daughter is crying, looking to him for answers, and he doesn’t have any. No comfort or wisdom he can offer her. 

Can you even be true mates with family members? Dean hadn’t thought so. That’s why he’d always reasoned that he and Sam could be in love, but they never felt that thing that people talked about, the thing that made you certain someone else had been made for you, and you alone. As much as he loved him, Dean had never had that with Sam. He has it fucking bad for Y/N though. And it’s not just an urge to belong together, like family might feel, it’s a primal need. It’s physical lust, and an irrational desire to be wrapped up inside her body, and put a bite on her neck to show everyone she ever meets that she belongs to someone. To Dean. These are not fatherly feelings. Despite his lack of familiarity with the role, he’s certain of that much, at least. 

“Sam,” Dean breathes, the name pushing itself out from between his lips against his better judgement. Sam and Y/N both turn to look at him, one wary, the other burning with hope. “It’s not just Y/N that felt it,” he admits shakily, making himself hold his brother’s gaze. He’s not a coward, he can look a man in the eye when he tells him he fucked his daughter. Their daughter. “She’s right, there’s something more than that between us. She–” his voice chokes up a little, to his extreme embarrassment, but he clears his throat and ploughs on. “I’ve felt more alive since I’ve met her than I have for the past twenty years. An–and being with her last weekend, it was like a missing gear finally clicked into place, man,” Dean laughs at how fucking cheesy he sounds, dropping his eyes to his hands momentarily and rubbing the heel of his hand across his brow. “I know how it sounds, but all that shit people say about finding ‘the one’ and just knowing, somehow,” Dean’s laugh dies on his lips when he looks back up to find Sam glaring at him with a hatred he’s only ever seen on their father’s face. He never could have imagined that Sam could feel that depth of malice. Very slowly, Sam stands from his seat, hands resting on the table as he leans forward. 

“Are you telling me–” every word is measured, precise, deadly. “–that you touched my little girl?”

Dean swallows thickly. Right. He should have seen this one coming. This is the fight he had been expecting to have with Y/N’s father when they met, after all. 

“Dad, it wasn’t like that!” Y/N leans between them, tugging on Sam’s sleeve in an effort to get him to return to his chair. “He helped me, I went into my heat too early. I could have wound up in the hospital if Dean wasn’t there.” 

If Y/N thought that would help matters, she was sorely mistaken. 

“You took advantage of her when she didn’t have clear judgement?!” Sam roars, the chair flying across the room as he storms around the table and hauls Dean out of his seat by his collar. 

“Dad!” Y/N shouts, but Sam isn’t paying any attention to her now.

“Hey! Cool it, Sam! You know I’d never fucking do that,” Dean hisses, his breath a little constricted due to Sam’s hold on him. 

“Do I?” Sam demands, seething. “I haven’t seen you in twenty years, Dean! What the hell do I know about you?!”

“I’m still your brother! You should know I’m not a fucking rapist!” 

“Boys!” There’s a shout and an audible click of a shotgun being loaded, and Sam and Dean both spin around to see Ellen walking steadily in their direction. “If you’re gonna let this dissolve into blows, you’ll kindly take it outside my establishment,” she fixes them with a look that brooks no argument, and Dean feels Sam’s anger deflate a little under her glare. 

“Sorry, Ellen,” Sam grunts, releasing Dean’s shirt and running his hands through his hair, pulling himself together. “There’s no need. Dean’s leaving.” 

“Dad, you can’t be serious!” Y/N stares at the pair of them with wide eyes, brimming with disbelief, and Dean thinks his own face probably looks quite similar. 

“Y/N Campbell, do not give me that look. I’m deadly serious and you know it.” Sam takes hold of Dean’s arms and marches him towards the door, Y/N following hot on their heels. 

“I was dropping by the Roadhouse to see if Ellen wanted to swing by a hunt I found a few counties over,” Sam informs Dean when they get outside to the parking lot, and Dean feels like he’s gotten whiplash from the change in conversation. 

“Okay… and?” 

“Why don’t you look into it instead?” Sam suggests, fishing a notebook out of his pocket and tearing out a page to hand it to Dean. He doesn’t look down as the paper is crumpled into his palm, he can only stare incredulously at Sam. “And then, don’t come back.” 

“And what if I do come back?” Dean asks stiffly. He’s never been a big fan of taking orders, his dad had left a bad taste in his mouth where that was concerned. 

“It will be pointless if you do. You’re never gonna see Y/N again,” Sam crosses his arms over his chest, squaring up to Dean menacingly, and instinctively he takes a step back. It feels like Sam’s knocked the wind out of his chest without even touching him. 

“Dad, please. You can’t mean that,” Y/N tries to run to Dean but Sam catches his arms around her waist and holds her back. “Dean, please!” she turns to him now, begging him not to leave. 

“What are you gonna do, Sam? You gonna send her away? Like what Dad did to you? Is being with me really so awful that a life on the run is the better option?” Dean’s voice cracks, and he has to hold back the tears that are threatening to break free. This is all his fault, the hurt he sees on both of the faces in front of him. Maybe Sam’s right, and they’d be better off if he stayed gone. 

“You know what Dean? Do me a favour and just let whatever monster that is take care of you for me, okay? Because if you ever touch my daughter again, I’ll kill you myself,” Sam snarls, and by God, Dean believes him. Y/N is sagging against Sam’s arms, tears falling freely as she continues to protest, her fists beating weakly against her father’s embrace. 

“Okay, Sam, okay,” Dean holds up his hands in surrender, flashing the paper Sam had pushed onto him. “I’ll go, and you won’t see me again.” He starts to step back towards the Impala when he hears a deep grunt and the skittering of gravel. 

“Dean, wait!” Y/N runs after him breathlessly, throwing herself into his arms. “I’m coming with you,” she pants, but Dean shakes his head immediately. 

“Y/N, no, you can’t,” he insists, brushing the hair back from her face so he can look at her properly, but not daring to do anything more affectionate with Sam staring at them, seething and still bent double from where Y/N had apparently kicked him between the legs. Dean feels a grim swell of pride at the sight. His baby girl is a fighter. “I know we didn’t get to talk about any of this, but I wasn’t about to start bringing you out hunting with me,” he laughs sadly, hoping she’ll understand.

“Why not?! I can take care of myself, I can shoot, and I know about ghosts and demons and monsters–” 

“Knowing about them ain’t the same as hunting them, baby girl,” Dean holds her cheek, savouring the way she presses herself into his palm. Sincerely hoping this isn’t the last time he feels that, but also knowing that it very well might be. “It’s way too dangerous.” 

“At least we agree on one thing,” Sam huffs, holding his hand out in ready as if he’s waiting for Dean to pass their daughter back over to him. “Say goodbye, Y/N.” 

The omega looks pleadingly between Sam and Dean, both resolute in the decision that she’s not going anywhere, and she realises she has no chance of persuading them otherwise. Desperately, she throws her arms around Dean’s neck, pressing her nose into his skin and breathing in as much of him as she can, and Dean can’t help but do the same, wrapping her up so tightly in his arms that her feet come up off the ground. 

“I’ll call you,” she whispers in his ear, and Dean squeezes her tight in response, to indicate he heard her, before he puts her down. 

“Goodbye, Y/N,” he breathes, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. Sam yanks her away before he has a chance to say anything else, marching her back towards the Roadhouse. 

With nothing else to do, Dean unrolls the paper in his hand and scans over the info Sam had given him. If this is a real lead, it does sound like something supernatural, so he may as well take a look at it while he and Y/N figure out what to do. Because he’s not going to let Sam run away from him again, and if he does, he’s not going to stop looking until he finds them.

Series Tags: @outofnowhere82 @ladysparkles78 @missusbarnes-rogers

We’re All Mads Here: @vulgar-library @negans-lucille-tblr @fandomfic-galore @petitgateau911 @schaefchenherde @kickingitwithkirk @little-diable @laxe-chester67 @kassyscarlett @austin-winchester67 @flamencodiva @katbratsupernaturalwhore @letsbys-library @fictional-affairs @leigh70

All SPN: @cemini-winchester @akshi8278 @stoneyggirl @deandreamernp @lyarr24 @lovealways-j @slamminmine @all-alone-he-turns-to-stone @alaufeyson @raidens-realm @tatted-trina6 @defenderrosetyler @cluz1babe @maliburenee

[fanfic-corner]

Destiel Emotional Hurt/Comfort Fics

Hello everyone! Beating our favourite characters up just so they can be fixed up again nicely is brilliant, but I also love fics that explore the emotional side of hurt/comfort, since it's often easier to fix a bullet wound than a broken heart. So, I hope you enjoy today's list of fics which mentally beat our favourite characters up!

Please note that a lot of these fics contain heavy subjects, so please make sure to read all of the warnings and tags before reading and take care of yourself!

choices. by scoundrelhan (1.1k)

Castiel thinks he’s dying. Humans are always doing that.

Exposed to What You Hide by SailorChibi (1.8k)

"We think Cas is a procubus," Sam blurted out. Then he winced and yelped when Charlie kicked him under the table. "Ow!"

"Smooth, Sam," Charlie snapped.

Dean looked back and forth between them, realizing that they were both 100% serious. "A procubus."

"Basically it's the sexless version of an incubus or a succubus," Charlie explained before Sam could. "It's... it's a demon that kills people by sleeping with them." She was chewing on her thumbnail now, eyes big and apologetic. Sam had done one better pasting on a truly epic kicked puppy expression of apology.

"You think Cas is killing people by cuddling with them," Dean said, just to be sure.

Could Not Return You by tigersinlondon (2.8k)

Dean struggles to commit to a long term relationship with Cas, even though he knows he's in it for the long haul. Cas helps tease out what's holding him back, and provides some much-needed reassurance.

You are my home by Desirae (4.7k)

Things have settled down since rescuing Sam. Mary is bonding with her sons, and Castiel is nearly back to full capacity, just needing a little sleep here and there. When Dean discovers Cas' unusual resting spot, what starts as a series confessions leads to the emotional healing they both needed.

Stories Are Made of Mistakes by wildhoneypie (4.9k)

In which Cas is human and doesn't understand basic concepts like: clothing, Mythbusters, moisturizer, and Greek food. Dean is...Dean and doesn't understand basic concepts like: boyfriends, language, how to tell your friend that he's a walking miracle, and when not to quip.

Enhanced Extraction Techniques by goldenraeofsun (5.7k)

The Empty takes Meg’s shape, Samandriel’s, Duma’s, every one of the thousands of angels Cas killed up in heaven. But in the middle of lecturing Cas in the form of Balthazar, it explodes in a burst of light and sound.

Dean Winchester stands in the aftermath.

Event Horizon by Winglesss (6.4k)

Castiel couldn't have helped his sister. That's why being offered a chance to help somebody else dealing with suicidal thoughts he took it without hesitation.

When he gets the first text from someone who needs his help, nothing goes as he expected.

broken when I'm lonesome by SailorChibi (7k)

After being saved from hell, Dean's old methods of coping aren't working anymore: he's not sexually attracted to anyone, and he's not interested in sex no matter how many times he climbs into bed with hot, naked women.

Sam is convinced that his brother is just depressed, but Dean knows this goes deeper than that. He still craves the intimacy that can make him feel safe.

Fortunately, Castiel is there to both understand and provide.

Nothing Equals the Splendor by RurouniHime (7.8k)

Maybe it’s the cynic in him. The hunter, always under the surface of any quietude he ever found. Or maybe it’s just that he has always had trouble with blind faith. But after a while (a blink? A decade? A century?), Dean raises his eyebrows, looks around, and says—

“Uh. No.”

It’s so close. Just so slightly imperfect. And maybe, he analyzes, maybe that’s the final knell of this bell called contentment. Dean’s experience with happiness has always been that last rise in the road, right before it turns. Right before fate comes barreling around the corner head on.

He turns in his spot on the bridge, and suddenly Sam is like a cellophane film through which he can see the light streaming, and the taste of cheap beer on his tongue is much, much older a memory than it should be.

“Oh, you’re good,” he says, and means it.

The Beginning by Princess_Aleera (17k)

Where a mission goes horribly wrong, and Castiel gets his wings plucked off for it.

That Black Dog Ache by SaltyWords (28k)

A simple case turns Dean upside down as he attempts to deal with the effects of a particularly strange love spell.

First Gentleman Wanted by youaresunlight (31k)

President of the United States Castiel Novak is popular, charismatic, and knee-deep in campaigning for a second term. He’d be the ideal candidate if it weren’t for the fact that he hasn’t dated once while in political office. With his opponent’s relentless PR team calling him incapable of emotional commitment, Castiel’s staff decides to remedy the situation by finding their boss a fake, picture-perfect boyfriend. And when Dean Winchester enters the scene, he and Cas become America’s new favorite couple, except they’ve got a whole lot of history between them and complicated feelings to resolve.

Just Like You by imherecauseimnotallthere98 (35k)

When John shows up at their door in the middle of the night, the Winchesters and Cas start looking into who or what could have brought him back. Meanwhile, Dean struggles to keep his relationship with Cas a secret from his father, with some help from Sam. The tension rises between the Winchesters as Dean shows John that he is no longer the obedient little soldier he once was, and tries to establish himself as an equal with his dad.

Rewriting the Book by MonPetitTresor (37k)

When Sam gets a little too close to stopping Metatron’s plans, the angel decides to use some of his extra juice to get Sam out of his way by sending him to a completely different reality. He never could’ve predicted what Sam might find there – or what he might bring back home with him.

Wild by Castielslostwings (67k)

Castiel and Dean meet for the first time on a plane ride out of Nowhere, Alaska. Castiel’s headed home after an impulsive solo vacation and Dean, a hardened Alaskan native, is just trying to get out of the impossibly small town he grew up in that’s got nothing left to offer him. They forge an instant connection over Dean’s flying anxiety and whiskey, a meet-cute that has all the makings of a rom-com with a sickeningly sweet happy ending. That is, until their plane explodes in mid-air, crashing headlong into the Alaskan wilderness and killing everyone on board save for Dean and Castiel. When no rescue shows up to save them, the two men are forced to make some tough decisions. To make it home alive they’ll have to trust each other and find faith neither of them has ever really wanted. Will they survive or succumb to the unforgiving mountain wilderness? And will their journey tear them apart... or bring them closer together?

carry on by foolondahill17 (91k)

God is dead. Sammy finally has what he always wanted. The kid is alive again and trying to figure out the whole human schtick. Cas – Cas is complicated, like always. And Dean is barreling headfirst into a mental breakdown. It’s the end of the road so far, and the future never looked so frightening.

The House on the Ocean Road by coffeeandcas (111k)

Dean Winchester is on the run from his life. He's done something unforgivable, and can't face his family or friends ever again. So he does what any rational person would do: fakes his own death and vanishes into the ether.

Wandering aimlessly along country roads, he succumbs to the elements during a violent storm and wakes up hours later in the home of a stranger: a single dad living alone in an isolated beach house, with a haunting past of his own. Cas is sweet and shy, but welcomes Dean into his home and tells him he can stay as long as he needs, never prying into his life or asking him to spill his secrets.

As they rapidly forge a close friendship, Dean finds that the quiet life by the ocean with Cas is exactly what he's been dreaming of. He only hopes his past never catches up with him.

Bound To You by Chipper99 (128k)

Faced with death, Dean makes one last ditch effort: praying to an Angel he knows wont hear him. Deans prayers are answered when a vessel-less Castiel forces himself out from the Empty, taking possession of Dean's body in order to heal him. Castiel's grace is running finite however, charged down after saving Dean's life. Now Castiel resides within Dean's mind, too weak to survive a transfer to another vessel, leading them to a desperate search for a way to rebuild his body. Time is of the essence, with Castiel's grace burning out with every passing day...

Four Letter Word For Intercourse by bendingsignpost (194k)

As a grease monkey turned college freshman, Dean's constantly three seconds away from being stressed out of his mind. It hardly helps that he's finally figuring out his sexuality in his thirties.

What might help with that stress is a little phone number (and a big credit card bill). If he can't figure out how to be bisexual in person, he can at least give it a go over the phone, right?

(It's probably a bad idea, but he really can't help himself.)

I hope you enjoy reading these fantastic fics!! And thank you to the amazing authors for sharing them with us. If you ever have any requests for a fic rec list, please let me know!

tag list under the cut! ask to be added or removed :D

@summer1066 // @goncharovcum

[watchingspnagain]

Rewatching Heaven and Hell

Welcome to “I think I shall never see an angel as lovely as a tree: A Supernatural Rewatch Blog” with Lor and Mace!

 Up today, s4e10: Heaven and Hell.

   So, turns out Anna is a fallen angel, and Cas and Uriel have been sent to bump her off. Meanwhile, Anna wants to do another kind of bumping with Dean, who's trying to come to terms with his part in the war between heaven and hell (oh, kitten, if only you knew). Speaking of hell, Ruby and Sam come up with a plan to save Anna while also pitting angels and demons against each other, and it works pretty well, save for Ruby getting tortured some and Anna taking it upon herself to juice up on her old grace and blitz the demons herself. Then, at the end, we get a Sitting-on-Baby's-Hood Confessional from Dean, who finally tells Sammy what really happened in Hell and for how long. The boys are become super-fret.

 Below is a log of our real-time reactions as we watched. Remember that there may be spoilers for any part of SPN’s 15-season run here. Note also that the nature of our conversation is adult and thus it may contain adult language and themes.

  [and we begin:]

 Lor:

nnggggg Cas and his poufy hair and his dramatic entrances

 Mace:

YAS

 Uriel pounds on Dean but Cas just forehead fingers Sam I LOVE HIM

 Lor:

YAAAAS

Imagine watching this not having SEEN it before

(I mean, I shouldn't have to imagine but I don't really remember)

 Mace:

YES

I don’t remember either

Lor:

"sent the angels to the outfield" DEEEEAN I love you

 Mace:

 YAS

 Lor:

I want to make fun of Anna for "we're in trouble huh?" but honestly the idea that if the Winchesters are scared it REALLY is time to be scared is pretty accurate

 Mace:

YUP

can it, Anna. Nobody cares.

 Lor:

right?

 Mace:

 PERKY LITTLE ASS

 Lor:

why did it take this show like seven years before they could write a woman less than 50 who wasn’t annoying as hell? (exception for Bella)

 YES

 Mace:

RIGHT?!

 i don’t know that I don’t believe in hypnosis but I can’t understand how anyone could be that suggestive. it doesn’t seem possible for someone to count backwards and make me go into a trance

 Lor:

right?

 Mace:

 suggestable? -ible?

 Lor:

suggestestibblitle

 Mace:

 EXACTLY

 Lor:

HOW did Dean not remember this and storm into the empty ready to ungrace Cas? just. HOW.

 Mace:

 RIGHT?!

 Lor:

smarty Sammy

 Mace:

 YAAASSS

 Lor:

I am SHOCKED that Dean thinks feelings are overrated

 Mace:

“you guys are… perfect” Um, hello.

 YES

 Mace:

 that = “Cas is perfect"

 Lor:

YEAH IT DOES

 Mace:

 i mean how many angels has he met?! he sure doesn’t think Uriel is perfect

 Lor:

Cas has been on this show for about 3 minutes at this point and I care 900% more about him than about Anna and her monologue

 Mace:

 HE GUYS CHECK THIS OUT Sam for the win

 Lor:

RIGHT?

 Mace:

 YUP

 Lor:

LOL

 I was gonna say, Sammy, his reality is looking an awful lot like a feverdream these days

 Mace:

 SNORK

 Lor:

I do really like the idea that an angel's grace falls to Earth and becomes a magnificent tree

 Mace:

ME TOO

 HA! That look from Sam. He’s pretty much done with Anna

 Lor:

YEP

 poor Dean. he's just been various versions of "what is my life this is above my pay grade" all ep

 Mace:

how do they not see this as a big ass bluff?! They need Dean

 HAHAHA YES

 Lor:

RIGHT?

 omg his flinch when she touches him

 Mace:

ugh, don’t touch him, hag

 ooof

 Lor:

stop seducing him he's scared

 Mace:

RIGHT?!

 you’re not the wings he wants, lady

 god, his back

 Lor:

LOL

 GET YOUR HAND OFF CAS'S HANDPRINT

 HOW DARE

 Mace:

 YEAH

 Lor:

seriously feels like the most shoehorned in sex scene ever

 Mace:

(Cas will consent to doing it almost anywhere Dean wants, but NOT inside Baby. He can smell her in there still. It’s never come up though because Dean suspects as much and would never.)

 YUP

 Lor:

I get what they were trying to do I guess, but I mean. they have no chemistry. and Dean doesn't sleep with people bc he connects with them over feelings. that's not how he works

 Mace:

 YUP

 Lor:

and nothing convinces me something about Anna makes him break that pattern

 Mace:

 I wonder if they’re trying to make some parallel between her and Dean and Sam and Ruby

 Lor:

(OMG I love that)

 oooof maybe?

they do a really EXCELLENT job paralleling Dean and Cas with Sam and whoever later, so guess they get better at that

 Mace:

 yeah

 Lor:

"HE LIKES YOU"

 Mace:

HE LIKES YOU OMG

 YAAAASSSS

 Lor:

YAAAAAAAS

 Mace:

 ope Team Free Will, bithces

 Lor:

"I guess I just like being a pain in the pooper"

 YAS

 Mace:

 HAHAHAHA

 Lor:

Uriel, you're gross

 Mace:

YUP

 “you’re junkless down there, right?” Is he asking for a friend?

 Lor:

HAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 that line always bothered me bc they're vessels but I guess he doesn't fully understand that yet

 Mace:

 yeah

 Lor:

omg Cas is having feelings over there

 Mace:

 HE IS

 Lor:

actually, I think he does. I think he's falling apart in a flood of feelings of all kinds under there

 Mace:

 YAS

 Lor:

whispers lay me to waste, Cas

 Mace:

he can lay me to waste ANY DAMN DAY

  HAHAHAHAHA YAS

 Lor:

HAAAAAHAHAHAHAHA

 YES Dean save Cas

 Mace:

OOOH DEAN SAVES CAS

  YAS

 Lor:

YES

 mrrrrf Cas's face

 Mace:

 YESYESYES

 Lor:

i always forget that Ruby bringing the demons was their plan

 Mace:

YES

  oh Sammy’s face

 Lor:

RIGHT?

 his voice breaking

 Mace:

 RIGHT?!

 Lor:

the lip tremble and the progression to like one tear

 Mace:

 YES

 Lor:

the tiny sobs he's not letting out

 Mace:

and Sam’s agony behind him

  I CANNOT

 Lor:

HOW DOES HE DO THIS?

 YES

 "I wish I couldn't feel a damn thing"

 GAAAAH

 AND all this while Cas is just starting to feel!

 Mace:

He envies the angels because he thinks they can’t feel, but Cas is starting to feel because of him

 Mace:

 OMG LOR

 Lor:

MAAAAAAACE

 Mace:

 Cas is the key to Dean taming those feelings and Dean is Cas’s key to opening up the feels

 Lor:

YAAAAAS

 [after the episode ended:]

Lor:

I'm so glad they didn't try to keep Anna as a foil/love interest/recurring character and went with Cas. even if they never ever intended any romantic feelings bt Dean and Cas *stares into camera*, Cas is a much more interesting character (the angel considering disobedience rather than the one who already made the choice) and Misha and Jensen are just so dynamic on screen. Anna is fine, but it doesn't come alive the way moments between Dean and Cas do

 Mace:

agreed

 i wonder if Misha’s already-clear-this-early acting chops were a part of that decision, plus the lack of chemistry with the Anna actor

 Lor:

i have heard that that was pretty much exactly it

 who knows what is really true or if that is just something that has been speculated and repeated so often for 14 years that it's become "true" but

 Mace:

 yeah

 I remember hearing/reading that, too

  Lor:

but beyond that I don't think I've heard anyone who would actually KNOW say anything about it

 and they aren't likely to? I mean, you'd effectively be saying the actress wasn't that great. none of those guys is gonna say that about a fellow actor

  Mace:

 exactly

[abbatoirablaze]

Angels & Demons, Chapter 4

Word Count:  1.4k Warnings:  slight angst, doubts, mentions of murder/smiting a town.

“Both of you…need to leave this town immediately…”

“Why?” Dean asked, his brow raising as he looked at the angels that stood before him, “What’s going on that we need to leave?”

Castiel frowned, “because we’re about to destroy it!”

“So what?” he asked, turning towards Uriel, “this is your plan?  You’re gonna smite a whole freaking town all because of some witch trying to go after a demon?”

“We’re out of time,” Castiel admitted with a frustrated huff as he tried to explain his position to Dean without giving too much away, “this witch has to die.  The seal must be saved.”

“There are a thousand people here.  You can’t just end their life because of one witch…because she’s ripping the seal of like it’s a bandaid!  You can’t do that.”

“One thousand, two hundred, and fourteen!” Uriel corrected.

“What?”

“There are one thousand, two hundred, and fourteen people!” the angel repeated, “not a thousand…if you’re going to be aggressive about what has to be done, get your numbers correct?”

“And you’re willing to kill them all?” Sam asked, his voice nearly cracking at the question.  He looked between the angels, shock lacing his features. 

In all of his time, he’d though that angels were there to help guide people away from evil.  They were the ones with the bright wings and shiny halos, saving people.

Not destroying them.

“This isn’t the first time I’ve…purified a city.”

“Look, I understand that this is regrettable…” Castiel said quickly, as though he was trying to smooth everything over, “this is-“

“Regrettable?” Dean scoffed, “that’s what you’re calling it?  YOU FEATHER HEADS WANT TO KILL OVER A THOUSAND PEOPLE BECAUSE OF ONE HAG?”

“We have to hold the line!” Castiel said defensively, “too many seals have broken already.”

“So you screw the pooch on some seals and now this town has to pay the price?”

“It’s the lives of one thousand verse the lives of six billion,” Castiel grumbled, trying to justify his position yet again, “there’s a bigger picture here!  We can’t focus on the little things.  We have to-”

“Right…because you’re bigger picture kind of guys!” Dean scoffed.

Castiel took a few steps forward, his anger getting the best of him, “Lucifer cannot rise.  He does and all of hell rises with him.  Is that something that you’re willing to risk?  Do you want to see what he does to all humans?  Not just their souls, but to them?”

“We’ll stop this witch before she summons anyone!” Sam said quickly, trying to break the tension, “your seal won’t be broken an no one has to die.”

“Castiel…we’re wasting time with these mud monkeys!” Uriel sneered.

“I’m sorry…but we have our orders!” Castiel sighed, turning his back on the brothers.

“Wait...no…you can’t do this!” Sam argued, “you’re angels.  I mean aren’t you supposed to-you’re supposed to show mercy!”

“Says who?” Uriel scoffed, “some little book that you humans wrote out thousands of years ago?  You don’t know what you’re doing, but we’re fighting a war.  And in wars, there are casualties.”

“We have no choice!”

“Of course you have a choice.  You say that it’s a war, but there have been shit calls in wars before,” Dean jumped in.  When Castiel nor Uriel agreed with him, he tried a new approach, “What?  You never questioned a crap order?  Huh?  What are you both just a couple of hammers?”

“Look…even if you can’t understand it, have faith.  The plan is just!”

“How can you even say that?”

“Because the plan comes from heaven,” Castiel answered Sam as he turned to him, “That makes it just.”

“It must be nice to be so sure of yourselves.”

“Tell me something Dean.  When your father gave you an order, didn’t you obey?”

Dean’s jaw clenched for a moment, as he struggled with his own internal demons.  Then his lips parted.  He had , “sorry boys…it looks like the plans have changed.”

Castiel gave Dean a questioning look while Uriel simply scoffed, “you think you can stop us?”

“No…but if you’re gonna smite this whole town…then you’re going to have to smite us with it, because we are not leaving!” Dean said as he stepped forward.  He turned his head to the side to look at Castiel when he saw the concern lacing Uriels’ eyes, “see you went through the trouble of busting me out of hell, I figure I’m worth something to the man upstairs. You want to waste me?  Go ahead.  See how he digs that?”

“I will drag you out of here myself.”

“Yeah…but you’ll have to kill me!  Then we’re back to the same problem,” Dean grunted, “I mean come on…you’re gonna wipe out a whole town for one little witch?  Sounds to me like you’re compensating for something.  We can do this.  We will find that witch and we will stop the summoning.”

“Castiel,” Uriel began, raising his voice, “do not let these-“

“Enough,” Castiel said firmly, stopping Uriel’s words, “I suggest you move quickly, Dean…”

“Let me guess…you’re here for the ‘I told you so,’ is that it, Castiel?” Dean asked as the mysterious angel appeared beside him on the bench.

Castiel continued to look forward at what was occurring at the playground, “no…”

“Well good because I’m really not that interested.”

“I’m not here to judge you Dean.”

“Then why are you here?”

“Our orders…” he admitted.

“Yeah, you know I’ve had enough of you and your orders.”

“Our orders,” he started once more, “were not to stop the summoning of Samhain.  They were to do whatever you told us to do.”

Dean leaned forward and his brow furrowed as he looked at Castiel, “your orders were to follow my orders?”

“It was a test…to see how you would perform under…battlefield conditions you might say.”

IT was a witch.  Not the tet offensive,” Dean scoffed, “So I failed your test.  I get it.  But you know what?  If you were wave that magic time traveling wand of yours and we had to do it all over again, I’d make the same call.  Cause you see, I don’t know what’s going to happen when these seals are broken.  Hell I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow.  But what I do know is this…here-these kids.  The swings, the trees, all of it-is still here because of my brother and me.”

“You misunderstand me Dean.  I’m not what you think,” Castiel replied, “I was praying that you would choose to save the town.”

Dean’s gaze shifted to that of the angel, and he found himself curious about what game that he was trying to play, “You were?”

“These people…they’re all my father’s creations.  They’re works of art.  And yet, even though you stopped Samhain, the seal was broken,” he sighed, leaning forward, “and we’re all one step closer to hell on earth for all of creation.  And that’s not an expression.  That’s literal.  And you of all people should appreciate what that means.  Can I tell you something if you promise not to tell another soul?”

“Okay…”

“I’m not, uh…a hammer as you say,” he admitted, “I have questions.  I-I have doubts.  I don’t know what is right and what is wrong anymore, and whether you passed or failed here. But in the coming months you will have more decisions to make.  I don’t envy the weight that’s on your shoulders Dean.  I truly don’t.”

Dean nodded thoughtfully for a second, “can I ask you something?  A real question?”

“Of course…”

“Why did you really pull me out of hell?”

“Someone that I was once told was an abomination sought me out,” he admitted, “she helped me answer a few of those questions when we snuck into hell to pull your soul out…she may have also added more questions than answers, but it was something that opened my eyes.” 

“She?” Dean scoffed, “I don’t remember you pulling me out of hell let alone some chick.”

“She isn’t ‘some chick,’ as you might say,” Castiel chuckled, “but she is someone that you know of.  It wasn’t god who called on me to pull you from hell.  It was her.  And it was because she knows the plan before we do.  Because she’s the only one that still hears his voice…”

“W-who’s voice?”

“She claims that it’s god,” he shrugged, “but he hasn’t spoken to any of us in ages.  A lot of us don’t believe her…or didn’t…but Dean, no one has ever been able to pull a soul out of hell.  She knew how.  She claimed that god gave her the key.”

“Who is she?”

I believe that you know her as a Hannah Singer…I know her as someone much different.”

And before Dean could ask another question, Castiel was gone.

Chapter 5

[antigonewinchester]

15x19

Blessed are the meek, for they shall... inherit the earth.

The ending scene, where Sam and Dean and Jack go up against and defeat Chuck, has a lot of echoes to 5x22: Lucifer killing Cas/Bobby for trying to help Dean > Chuck killing Michael for trying to help Sam & Dean; Lucifer wailing on Dean > Chuck wailing on Sam & Dean; Sam taking back control from Lucifer, taking back ‘his power’ over himself and saving Dean/the world > Jack gaining power from Sam & Dean’s beating and then taking Chuck’s power for himself, although instead of Sam jumping into the Cage into Hell, Jack ascends to Godhood/Heaven, so a much happier end. 

CHUCK: This... This... This is why you're my favorites. You know, for the first time, I have no idea what happens next. Is this where you kill me? I mean, I could never think of an ending where I lose. But this, after everything that I've done to you... to die at the hands of Sam Winchester...  Of Dean Winchester, the ultimate killer... It's kind of glorious. DEAN: Sorry, Chuck. CHUCK: What? What? DEAN: See, that's not who I am. That's not who we are. CHUCK: What kind of an ending is this? SAM (to JACK): His power. You sure it won't come back? JACK: It's not his power anymore. SAM (to CHUCK): Then I think it's the ending where you're just like us and like all the other humans you forgot about. DEAN: It's the ending where you grow old, you get sick, and you just die. SAM: And no one cares. And no one remembers you. You're just forgotten.

There’s a poetic justice, in Chuck misusing his power, never really caring about his creations, and thinking himself above humans, then getting turned into one of those weak, powerless humans himself. But it also makes being human into something of a punishment in a way that feels depressing to me, like it’s humiliating for Chuck to be dragged down to humanity’s level.

Buckner & Ross-Lemming really do go back again & again to the “Dean as a killer” idea, huh. I wonder how much it was them who shifted this theme, because there are elements of it in Kripke/Gamble’s seasons but it’s very much connected to Dean’s abusive upbringing as a child hunter in a way that gets lost / downplayed / minimized as the show goes on. Kind of paired with how hunting isn’t the same in later seasons as it is in earlier ones, too.

JACK: Dean, I'm not coming back home. In a way... I'm already there. DEAN: Where? JACK: Everywhere. SAM: So you are Him. JACK: I'm me. But I know what you mean. SAM: What if we want to see you? You know, or have a beer or whatever? JACK: I'm around. I'll be in every drop of falling rain, every speck of dust that the wind blows, and in the sand, in the rocks, and the sea. DEAN: It's a hell of a time to bail. You got a lot of people counting on you, people with questions. They're gonna need answers. JACK: And those answers will be in each of them. Maybe not today, but... someday.  People don't need to pray to me or to sacrifice to me. They just need to know that I'm already a part of them and to trust in that. I won't be hands on. Chuck put himself in the story. That was his mistake. But I learned from you and my mother and Castiel that... when people have to be their best... they can be. And that's what to believe in. Well... I'm really as close as this. (JACK puts his hand over his heart). Goodbye.

Even knowing the Jack becomes God ending, I can understand why some Jackgirls really don’t like it, and it does feel a bit melancholy to me, although I do think it is intended to be bittersweet. It’s Jack coming into his power, and because he’s a good person, he knows how to use it well--healing Sam & Dean, restoring the world. Even though Jack is in ‘everything,’ there’s still a sense of loss, a separation from him and Sam & Dean. Jack saves the world but loses the chance at a normal life, even if the possibility he could have one was pretty slim. (Or maybe I’m just thinking too much abt how Jack’s ending parallels Dean’s, heh.) I don’t care for the baby!Jack fandom trend, but I think I get where it’s coming from, in giving Jack a normal childhood that he never had and never gets (plus Destiel being dads, usually).

There’s also that Jack very much ends up a Christ figure in the story, with the last 4 eps of the season seeing Jack’s “death,” resurrection, and ascension. ...oh, and that actually gives an interesting spin to 15x17 in Dean denying Jack as family right before trying to lead him to his death, huh.

(Although that makes the optics of Jack as a Christ figure defeating Chuck, this cruel & unforgiving ‘older’ God who was also a character created (and sort of representing) an earlier era of the show led by a Jewish showrunner & many Jewish writers look, uh, Very Not Good. I don’t think it was intended, but yikes...)

[steely-eyedmissileman]

Supernatural, Ep. 4x02

Are You There, God? It's Me, Dean Winchester

no, god is not there. but cas is!

i'd say this episode is just okay, but i liked it so much better than episodes that were 'just okay' in season three. so, this episode is just okay, but know that the scale has changed since last season. this wasn't groundbreaking. i don't feel the need to start singing praises, but i will say that i liked this episode.

i like consequences. not just the buffy episode, though that is a good ep. but, in my media, i like when characters have to face the consequences of their actions, when mistakes that they've made come back to haunt them. that's my problem with most sitcoms and many star trek shows: at the end of the episode, we forget about the events. but every action has an equal and opposite reaction: a law of physics that everyone uses incorrectly, and that i am going to use incorrectly right now. so much of television ignores this, and let's be honest, supernatural has already done more than its fair share.

but let's enjoy this slice of a world where people are faced with their past actions. let's enjoy this slice of a show where characters act and the world reacts. let's enjoy some consequences, finally.

first off, henriksen. he has some decent points with sam. it's true that lilith was hunting for sam, and the brothers left innocent people in the firing line. however, henriksen does not advocate for having sacrificed nancy. he wouldn't anyway, given his objections at the time. however, i don't think his accusations are entirely fair. as far as we know, nancy and the cop didn't tell the brothers that a demon got away, so they had no way to know that lilith would be back. additionally, what would their presence at the scene have accomplished? lilith wouldn't have spared the innocents. she's not that kind of gal. henriksen would still be dead, and it's likely that sam would be too. i understand that the ghosts comments are not meant to be an accurate reflection of events, but the brothers do not defend themselves. it's just another pound of guilt for their psyches, rather than an examination of their past actions. and henriksen's reveals to dean are just that. yes, they're horrific, but they don't bring the viewer or dean to a different understanding of the brothers' actions.

meg, on the other hand... the human meg masters has legitimate grievances, and very good points. yes, the winchesters threw her out a window when they could have, and should have, done an exorcism. if they had exorcised her, the demon would have gone to hell and prevented a lot of the events of the following season. additionally, the brothers have a habit of treating possessed people as already dead. in general, they seem to operate from a position of believing the 'meat suit' is dead. saving a possessed person is always a bonus, an unexpected boon. in general, only those familiar to the brothers can reliably expect an exorcism rather than a killing. at the tail end of season three, they were killing possessed humans left, right, and center. meg's ghost is an exhortation to remember the people caught up in the fight. she did not choose to be possessed, and she certainly didn't choose to die. (on second thought, i don't totally remember why she went out the window, since i watched this episode in 2021. however, the point still stands in general.)

all the other ghosts have valid points, but they are more aggregate than specific. other small moments: ruby's fear amuses me, and sam's confusion about it amuses me much more. she's a demon, dumbass. bobby's panic room is amazing, in the sense that it's an incredibly paranoid thing to do and i am in awe of it.

now, to my guys: i didn't have any particular thoughts about sam except his confusion about ruby. like, he's there? good for him?

dean, once again, does not think he deserves to be saved. and henriksen's ghost pours salt in that gaping wound. by his own words, he's Just Some Guy. he didn't ask to be saved. he didn't ask to be chosen (is this reminding anyone else of an approximately five foot four blonde girl?). but, chosen he was. dean struggles to understand his position, struggles to understand why he is above again. in this episode, he makes no significant progress. his exhortation of god, though, oh baby that's good. dean doesn't believe in god because god has not yet showed that he is worthy of belief. it's less a matter of disbelief than discernment. dean would rather believe in a cruel, heartless world where bad things happen purely by chance than believe that an intelligent creator could be so neglectful. which is particularly interesting, given his history with neglectful creators. (fuck you, **** **********)

and now let's talk about cas! he's my little guy, his hair is so fluffy, he will just stand and stare at people while they sleep. you could cut the tension in this scene with a knife. i'm really trying to hold back the rather sizable part of my brain that thinks that these two are in love and have been in love the whole time. but, it's just so hard when their scenes are thrumming with tension. it's heartbeat felt through the jugular levels of tension here. there was no need for them to be talking in the kitchen in the middle of the night, incredibly close to one another, intermittently looking at a space i would describe as the other's lips. there was no need. and cas has told us the main plot of the season, which feels a little early to me, a girl who never expects a main plot to ramp up until episode seven of a twenty-two episode season. not because of a certain show or anything... no, definitely not. anyways, now that he's spoiled the plot early, talked about angels dying, and threatened dean (do not believe this threat, dean. he went to an immense amount of trouble to get you out of hell. it would be a waste of man-hours to return you to the pit), cas just flits right off. bye bye love / bye bye happiness / hello loneliness / i think i'm gonna cry / bye bye love / bye bye sweet caress / hello emptiness / i feel like i could die / bye bye my love goodbye

[sarah-dipitous]

Hellsite Nostalgia Tour 2023 Day 86

Sympathy For the Devil

“Sympathy For the Devil”

Plot Description: Dean and Sam watch as the devil emerges from hell and must deal with the aftermath

Would I Survive the First Five Minutes??: probably not, honestly. I’m not Winchester Special

Oh Luciiiiiiiiii, I’m hooooooooome (honestly I can hardly imagine waiting months between the end of last season and this episode. It was hard enough waiting 30-ish hours)

You brushed off the huge fight between your and your brother that ended with him breaking the last seal and then being teleported to an airplane as the ACTUAL Devil escaped ACTUAL Hell because you need to find Cas. Yeah. Okay 👍 never change, Dean

So like…if you wanted us to actually BELIEVE that Cas exploded, maybe don’t put Misha’s name in the credits like that. I dunno. Don’t let me tell you how to run your show

Ugh, fucking Zachariah…

Does…does the angel banishing sigil always need to be drawn in blood? Or does Dean just believe that because that’s how he saw his friend Cas do it that one time? (He called Cas his friend 🥰 we know this is a long and extremely slow burn that…still isn’t technically done slowly burning SOMEHOW)

…I just…that’s VERY convenient writing to say “whoever put Sam and Dean on that plane” cured Sam of all demon blood cravings

Oh…don’t know how I feel about Dean continually sweeping what happened last time under the rug. Yeah, there’s really nothing Sam can say to make up for freeing Lucifer but…the way Dean’s gonna stew because he knows but doesn’t want to confront it

Yeah, I dunno, dude, I wake up like that for like a week every month. It’s no biggie.

How DOES Lucifer choose his vessel? Like, if demons just possess willy nilly but angels need permission, someone to pray for that, and Lucifer IS an angel…

Omg i forgot about Becky…don’t know if I like her but I do understand her. If I found out my favorite series was real and I was sent by the person who created it to…even meet the main characters, it wouldn’t even have to be my favorites…no but really, if Horikoshi called me up and was like “I need you to go take this message to the League of Villains,” in my head, this would be me. I would be differently awkward, though

I never thought I’d hear Bobby tell either of those boys that they better lose his number. I’m no Sam apologist, the things he did last season were bad, setting Lucifer free was bad, but I didn’t think I’d see Bobby turn his back on Sam, if (when) they stop Armageddon. He didn’t know killing Lilith was the last seal! And before that Bobby was the one telling Dean that he had to try and keep trying to bring Sam back to them.

Again, I’m no Sam apologist, but he wasn’t the only Winchester to break a seal. Dean broke the first one

Ok yeah, THAT makes way more sense. Wasn’t Bobby at all, but a demon possessing him. And…is that New Meg??

Oh this poor man. The torture he’s going through. (It’s being highly insinuated that he’s lost his VERY VERY young child. Like still a baby young. But as he’s packing up blankets and stuffed animals, the baby monitor picks up crying even though he KNOWS there’s no baby in the crib.) is he going to be tortured until he can’t take it anymore and begs, PRAYS for an end to his suffering? And Lucifer grants that to him (I do know this dude becomes the vessel, I’m just curious to see HOW it happens)

I knew this plot point was coming, but I didn’t know it was THIS soon, Dean being meant to be the archangel Michael’s vessel

GOD I love how much of a special little guy Dean is. This stalemate between him and Zachariah is delicious. HE won’t stand around and let Lucifer burn the world to ashes, but he also has no interest in being Michael’s vessel. Zachariah would LOOOOVE to just kill Dean and maybe everyone he loves, but how is that going to get him to consent to being Michael’s vessel??

Zachariah, that is not how consent works. If you force someone to consent, that’s just coercion.

Castiel 🤝 Shoto Todoroki: showing up somewhere unexpectedly with a grand show of power and instead of answering HOW it is they’re there, they just point out that that’s a good question. Also, me loving them immensely

Yeah…I can understand how Nick would say yes to being Lucifer’s vessel.

I KNEW Bobby would never say that to Sam!!

Man, remember when they used to have even somewhat cute heart to hearts at the end of the episodes?? I get Dean saying everything thing he did about what happened and how he doesn’t think he can ever trust Sam again, but…fucking damn it hurts

“Been On My Mind…”: I guess Meg did kiss Dean but there was no love there. 8

[fandomimaginesftw]

Can I request a fic for Lucifer where he overhears the reader arguing with the Winchesters because they found out she has feelings for The Devil & she stands her ground & pretty much tells them to piss off because it's her life & her choice & partly because she actually understands & can relate to the reasoning behind why Lucifer does the things he does & acts the way he does.

Misunderstood

I actually want to do a part two to to this, let me know if you'd be interested! I hope you like it, I know it's kinda short, sorry

SPN Tags: @carryonmyswansong @mogaruke @hobby27

“Y/N! I can’t even believe what I’m hearing right now!” Dean growled, hitting the table out of frustration. Sam’s brw was more furrowed than Y/N had ever seen it, but at this point in time, there was no going back. Y/N locked eyes with Dean, anger crinkling their features.

“I don’t care what you guys think about this! You can’t bully or scare me into changing my mind. I’ve felt this for a long time.” They crossed their arms, straightening their posture to make sure their words came across how they wanted them to, like they were confident in what they were saying, because they were.

“How can you say that?” Sam asked softly, as if he had just been betrayed by someone he cared about. Which was valid for Sam. Y/N did feel a little guilt, knowing what Lucifer had put Sam through. They weren’t excusing that, none of that was okay, but they understood to a certain extent.

“Look, all I’m saying is…I understand where he’s coming from. I don't think what he’s done to Sam or the rest of your friends and family is okay, I’m not encouraging that in the slightest. However, I’m just saying maybe he’s really not all that bad. I mean, if my dad said I was his favorite and then replaced me with someone that wasn’t even great to begin with, I’d be a little pissed!” Dean and Sam scoffed, shaking their heads. “Have you ever read the bible? Huh? Lucifer was the most loved angel by God, and then one day he’s replaced by us, humans. Impure, sinful, and greedy human beings. God held them so highly that Lucifer couldn’t believe it. But even now, he does God’s bidding! God sent him to hell to punish the humans that went against his fathers word. Loyal to his father to the end, no matter how messed up he might be, sounds familiar doesn’t it?” And with that, there was nothing but silence. The brothers looked up at Y/N, then at each other. Neither of them could really deny Y/N’s words, when they put it that way it was hard to argue, especially when they brought John into it. 

What the three of them didn't know, though, was that a certain archangel was listening to these words, in utter shock that a human perfectly described him. Lucifer listened, some strange feeling tugging at his heart. He’d never felt so seen, and he had no idea how to deal with it. His eyes glowed red and he felt his angel wings flutter at each word they said. He needed to let them know how it made him feel, and he would when they all dispersed from each other.