#I love you guys’s tags about this funky little guy please keep them coming

[vosveti]

Hold on tight spider monkey

[astonmartinii]

reluctant cupid | lando norris social media au

pairing: lando norris x fem bff!reader

you could set your bestie up with a driver or you could confess your feelings? lando norris is dumb.

based on this request: Could you write something about being best friends with lando and he tries to help set you up with another driver you have a crush on, but then he realises he actually likes you so he has to sabotage all the wingmanning he’s done and you end up together Idk if that makes sense 😭🫶🏼🫶🏼 -@mbappesleftthigh

MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

yourusername

liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri and 49,340 others

yourusername: someone please save me from the grips of hinge and this oh so lonesome life

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user1: girl knows the whole f1 paddock and looks like that and is still alone there is NO HOPE for me

user2: this post might have thrown me over the edge

landonorris: "i'm so lonely" "why don't you approach that guy" "no too scary"

user3: that's so real though

yourusername: thank you!

landonorris: how do you expect to find a boyfriend when you don't like to talk to anyone and treat hinge like a gameshow

yourusername: i didn't come here for actual advice let me commiserate in peace. god, can women have anything these days?

landonorris: ???

yourusername: oh! idea! pretty please set me up with one of your friends? they have to be great otherwise you wouldn't be friends with them, right? RIGHT?

landonorris: i guess...

yourusername: please lando, i've never asked for anything before

landonorris: i can feel you pouting through the phone

yourusername: so you'll consider ?

landonorris: fine...

user4: bro either gotta admit his feelings now or be condemned to be in the plot of a weird romantic comedy

user5: i personally don't think i can wait until the third act break up with this side character LANDO ACT NOW

oscarpiastri: you'd really trust lando's judgement?

yourusername: he's friends with me, he's got good taste?

oscarpiastri: touche

maxverstappen1: whatever you really wanna say oscar, you gotta keep it in, these idiots will figure it out eventually

yourusername: ???

landonorris: ???

user6: the grid are so done with their asses i can't 😭

user7: but what if the universe doesn't intervene and lando really has just lost the girl forever?

user8: bestie we can't be thinking like this

landonorris

liked by carlossainz55, yourusername and 812,047 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: being back home means being bothered by her (and whatever is her newest hyperfixation - it's sylvanian families this month if you couldn't tell)

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user9: i am so sorry but they are so in love

user10: it's cute in the movies, but these blind bitches are starting to piss me off

yourusername: THEY CAN HEAR YOU, BE A BETTER DAD

landonorris: they're not my children

yourusername: you take that back right now, you LOVE them

landonorris: you spent my money on them yes

yourusername: that's fatherhood, buddy. buckle up

user11: whoever he sets her up (if he's still dumb enough to do that) is gonna be the biggest third wheel in history

user12: who would willingly sign up for that

user13: me. i would. i have two working eyes and have seen y/n

maxverstappen1: who are these funky little critters and how can i procure some for p?

yourusername: finally a man with sense, literally any grocery store or toy store

maxverstappen1: perf

yourusername: if lando stops being mr. grumpy i'll ask him if i can come to a race and p and i can play animal families

landonorris: i am NOT mr. grumpy

maxverstappen1: you kinda are dude. is it the set-up is it stressing you out?

landonorris: nO

yourusername: then why are you putting it off !!! lando i might die from terminal yearning !!!

landonorris: i have an interested candidate

yourusername: really? do you think they'll actually like me? like this isn't a pity date right?

landonorris: nope!

user14: lando is typing through tears as we speak

user15: if y/n does go on a date with someone from the paddock i actually hope it goes well, as one lonely girl to another, it's tough out here we need one win

f1wagupdates

liked by user18, user19 and 11,043 others

tagged: yourusername & carlossainz55

f1wagupdates: turns out lando is a bit of a cupid as his childhood friend y/n y/ln was spotted out and about with carlos sainz.

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user20: HE ACTUALLY DID IT

user21: that moment when you're so down bad for a girl that you set her up with your best friend

user22: that moment when you're such a wimp you can't admit your feelings and set up the girl you like with a literal GREEK GOD

user23: i am so bamboozled by this move he literally looked like a kicked puppy on his stream bro this is your doing 😭

user24: she's a lover girl she's going to get her heart broken :(

user25: this has mess written all over it

user26: she's literally described herself as a terminal yearner i feel like she'll throw herself in and will get hurt

user27: UNLESS! this is all part of the plan? what if lando set her up with a messy guy like carlos so he can be the shoulder to cry on and that's how he slides in?

user28: that's very convoluted, very rom-com but i'll take it if it means we get lando and y/n together in the end

user29: i know this probably won't last long but can we all appreciate how hot this couple is?

user30: lando and y/n runs rings round y/n and carlos

user31: lol lando is a bad friend for setting her up with CARLOS him and charles are THEE red flags

user32: i hope y/n is prepared

user33: also lando hasn't thought it fully out if his plan is to be the shoulder to cry on because he's just opening her up to be called a homie hopper or a paddock bunny

carlossainz55

liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly and 702,554 others

carlossainz55: productive weekend with my girl

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user34: well that's not y/n

user35: that finished faster than i expected

user36: lando DO NOT quit your day job

landonorris: call me bro

carlossainz55: si, cabron

user37: i don't think they'll be cabrons after this call

user38: maybe this is all just going to plan?

user39: yall gotta give up this conspiracy theory maybe these people are just as dumb and mean as they seem to be

user40: soooooo... what did we all do this weeekend?

user41: i broke a girl's heart @carlossainz55 twins 👯‍♂️

user42: AHHHH???

maxverstappen1: oh that's not-

yourusername: you're so chronically online :(

maxverstappen1: you're alive?

yourusername: yes. coming at you live from the bed i'm currently rotting in

maxverstappen1: not going to say i didn't warn you?

carlossainz55: really? in my own comment section?

yourusername: one second, we're having a conversation here

maxverstappen1: yeah carlos, gosh.

carlossainz55: i'm so confused

user43: okay power move to just start a conversation in his comments?

user44: the power of confusion is simply unmatched

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 56,309 others

yourusername: certified boy hater

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user45: a ferrari boy will do that to you

landonorris: feeling hashtag victimised rn

yourusername: obviously doesn't include you girlypop. but you seriously need to reevaluate your judgement

landonorris: carlos is attractive?

yourusername: he ghosted me?

carlossainz55: i am right here

yourusername: blocked.

landonorris: did you actually just block him?

yourusername: yes 😀 !

landonorris: god this is a nightmare

yourusername: not if you'd take a GOD DAMN HINT

landonorris: WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

user46: yall this is a public instagram comment section

user47: don't say that, this is their argument in the rain moment

user48: lemme grab the popcorn 🍿

maxverstappen1: this better not include the real number one girlypop here

yourusername: of course not pookie

oscarpiastri: you gonna continue the lil spat above this?

yourusername: no?

oscarpiastri: well some people (max and i) would like to listen so please continue

yourusername: no, i don't think i will

oscarpiastri: GOD YOU PEOPLE ARE INSUFFERABLE

maxverstappen1: what oscar said

user49: oscar and max are so real

user50: they can't leave us on this cliff hanger

landonorris

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo and 1,043,788 others

landonorris: some snaps from '23

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user51: have we just been thirst trapped?

user52: i don't think it was intended for us

user53: this has "i am hotter than carlos sainz" written all over it

yourusername: posting tits on main, brave.

landonorris: i came second in singapore.

yourusername: sureeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. modesty, ever heard of it lan?

landonorris: slutshaming isn't cute y/n

yourusername: you kinda have to pull to be a slut lan. you are under qualified for the position

landonorris: if you keep being mean to me i will call your mum or my mum.

yourusername: try it. i see cisca more than you, i have faith in her

landonorris: the line is busy. are you on the phone to MY mum right now?

yourusername: maybe.

user54: we're so close to them getting their heads out of their asses

user55: don't get my hopes up

danielricciardo: i hope this works lol

landonorris: you don't think i'm sexy?

danielricciardo: it doesn't matter what i think

landonorris: i'm not sexy :(

danielricciardo: you're baiting me but yes, you are sexy.

user56: i'll fight anyone who made this man believe he's not beautiful

liked by yourusername

user57: I SAW THAT 📸

user58: someone just lock them in a cupboard at this point

oscarpiastri: noted.

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, landonorris and 89,034 others

tagged: landonorris

yourusername: yeah, yeah. you can stop yelling at us now.

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user61: LET'S FUCKING GO

user62: it was worth all that yelling. i expect an invite to the wedding now.

user63: wedding? girly they only just realised their feelings after a DECADE

maxverstappen1: it was about fucking time

yourusername: okay miss ma'am. some people are EMOTIONALLY VULNERABLE AND NOT VERY GOOD AT PROCESSING THEM

maxverstappen1: you must've been emotionally constipated because this was painful

yourusername: it was painful for me too

maxverstappen1: so painful that you dated CARLOS

yourusername: one date! ONE!

maxverstappen1: carlos said can you unblock him so he can be mean to me?

yourusername: fine.

carlossainz55: STOP MAKING ME LOOK LIKE A BAD PERSON. YES I AM NOT THE BEST AT RELATIONSHIPS BUT LEAVE ME BE

maxverstappen1: lol

yourusername: lol

user64: unblocking carlos to hit him with the lol max and y/n might be more iconic than lando and y/n

landonorris: not on our relationship announcement post 🤨

user65: OOP.

landonorris: i love you doofus

yourusername: i love you too muppet

landonorris: how much was the betting pool for your family?

yourusername: it got to over £300

landonorris: ours was £750

yourusername: are we dumb?

landonorris: no!

oscarpiastri: two dumbass girls saying 'yass' to each other

yourusername: LEAVE US BE

landonorris: oscar :(

user66: not their own families betting on when they'd get together 😭

landonorris

liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername and 1,430,778 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: first win, hopefully not my only one.

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user67: MY BABIES

user68: i feel like i've been on this journey with them

oscarpiastri: thank god you guys got your shit together, i was THIS close to jumping out the nearest window if i had to watch lando mope around like a kicked puppy when y/n had the lil thing with carlos

user69: so it wasn't some grand plan?

oscarpiastri: no he's just dumb enough to actually set up his first love with his best friend

landonorris: OSCAR!

oscarpiastri: am i wrong?

landonorris: no... but! i got there in the end

oscarpiastri: good thing you're faster on track

user70: the grid being just as done with them as us is killing me

maxfewtrell: finally this unnecessarily long and overly convoluted saga has come to and end, lets never do this again!

landonorris: i'm locked in for life bro no worries

yourusername: awwwwwwwwwwwwww i love you too bubs

maxfewtrell: stop being sappy under my comment

yourusername: you just complained we didn't sort out our shit fast enough and now we're too sappy?

landonorris: STICK TO A STORY BOZO

maxfewtrell: now you're even more ride or die... can we go back?

yourusername: nope!

landonorris: nope!

maxverstappen1: i for one am very happy for you both

yourusername: thank you max !!

landonorris: not so fast, he had the biggest bet on us in the paddock

yourusername: get that bag sis

landonorris: ???

yourusername: we can't fight it anymore, let them have their jokes, we actually have each other now :)

landonorris: yes we do :) xx

user71: golly gosh this is so fucking cute

fin.

note: i hope this is what you were looking for and that you all enjoyed!! i'm just waiting on my tester sticker sheets for my small business @badlydrawnf1cats on here and on instagram, if you wanna give it a follow x tHANK YOU FOR READING MY LOVES X

[brwnicons]

×VSC×

AAAAA OKAY OKAY SKSJSJS

Could I request Jesse with a ftm trans reader (or just male reader if you're not comfortable writing for a trans guy reader) that's got like, funky lil habits? They'll do a little jig out if nowhere or start tapping their feet like a duck when excited. Bite him when they're feeling affectionate and rub their face all over Jesse's in another affectionate manner? I think it's just cuz I'm a funky lil autistic guy but I'd love to just headbutt him and tackle him down with a hug as well.

Just kinda. Feral and quirky. I'd ask him to use his hands as my bra just out of nowhere too because I'm like that.

I hope this isn't too confusing aaaaaa 😭😭

×Vexelier×

☆ Of course I'm comfortable with it! I'm trans myself so I love seeing some representation around <3☆

Jesse x Trans!Male Reader

-> Summary: Jesse and his boyfriend's funky little habits

Headcanons, scenarios. Male reader, Fluff. I can't remember if it's mentioned but reader is trans!

-> Warnings: If I catch you fetishizing mlm relationships or tagging this as yaoi or any homophobic slur you go blocked. Same goes with transphobic behaviour.

Please tell me if you find any mistake!

[☆]

-> You have the purest soul he has ever met.

▪︎ Your habits make his heart melt

▪︎If he sees you doing a little jig while a smile is spread across your face and an improvised melody leaves your lips, he won't be able to resist the need to hug you tightly.

▪︎ "Jesse!", you squeal as his arms embrace you, "You're squeezing me!"

▪︎ The least he wants is to hurt you so he'll stop at the moment and do a quick check, he got worried.

-> Duck feet tapping

▪︎He knows you are pretty energetic so he won't suggest you to be around him when he is working in his office

▪︎But, if you want to stay there, he won't complain either. He just begs you to don't talk so he doesn't get distracted from his work.

▪︎So, when you happen to be around when he's doing paperwork (maybe you wanted to spend time with him or you are just curiously exploring the room) and you're not sat on his lap as usual, you take your time to wander around the room. You head to a dark wooden bookshelf at the side of his room, where your sight meets a silver decorative sword and a couple of gifts you gave him.

▪︎tap...tap...tap -Your taps start, they're are only a few at first and Jesse notices but, since they don't bother him, he doesn't tell you anything. As seconds pass, your sounds get faster- taptaptaptaptapta

▪︎Jesse calls your attention by knocking on the table he is working on with his knuckles and your tapping stops.

▪︎'See something you like?'

▪︎You swing your arms lightly before pointing with your head at your presents laying on the shelf.

▪︎"Those are mine" you say sheepishly

▪︎Jesse follows your gaze and finds what you were talking about. He chuckles softly and shakes his head.

▪︎His hand reaches for his desk drawer and once he opens it, he gives you a "come here" gesture.

▪︎'I carefully keep all of them. I've also go some in the glove compartment in my car for when I'm out' he signs as he shows you a bunch of drawings, little shiny rocks and tiny objects.

▪︎Your tapping starts again, making him chuckle softly. You give him a huge grin before sinking in his arms to give him a big hug, your tapping never ceasing.

-> Ñam -biting him

▪︎He is so confused the first time you do it

▪︎You were laying with him on his designer couch. Jesse was doing something on his computer and your head rested on his lap, your hands busy scrolling through some social media. His left arm was on your face, his hand stroking your cheek gently.

▪︎One time his hand got near your mouth and without thinking, you sank your fangs on his finger. He instantly retired his hand and looked up confused, worried that he might have bothered you.

▪︎"Why have you stopped?"

▪︎'You bit me...'

▪︎"Oh, sorry -Did I hurt you?"

▪︎Once you explain it to him he's completly fine with you giving him little chomps from time to time, he thinks it's cute, you look like a little puppy.

-> Rubbing your face all over his

▪︎The first you did it was probably while you were cuddling in bed, about to go to sleep.

▪︎He thinks it's very cute, and seeing your wide grin while you do it makes it totally worth it.

▪︎Honestly, I think this is his favourite little habit of yours.

▪︎He adopted your gesture and will also rub his face on yours!! He loves doing it when he is tickling you or when you're cuddling.

▪︎It always manages to make you giggle and laugh and he couldn't ask for more

-> Hugs

▪︎There's nothing he loves more than your hugs.

▪︎The moment that he hears the fast tapping on the floor approaching him, he quickly turns to your direction to catch you in his arms and receive your hug

▪︎You'll have to try hard if you want to tackle him, this man's a brick wall

▪︎Alas, if you catch him when he's having a bit less of balance and you succeed in tackling him, he will explode into giggles as he hugs you and rubs your head playfully

You really couldn't dream of a better partner.

[deanstead]

Stalked

Pairing: Kelly Severide x Reader

Requested by anon: Could I get 13 and 19 on the prompt list, please! Kelly x reader where the reader is a bartender at Molly’s and ends up with a stalker. Maybe a sprinkle of Jay helping out, too.

Warnings: mentions of stalking, anxiety, mild cursing

A/N: Prompts were meant for drabbles but…. It became too long to be labelled as a drabble so tagging this as a one-shot but I used the prompts! Just felt there needed to be a bit of a build-up for a stalker backstory. Hope you like it! Would also love to hear what you think!

---

You had been getting the feeling that you were being followed for the past few weeks.

There were just a few moments in your day when you felt that you were being watched. It started off at Molly’s when you were pulling your bartending shift, the hairs on the back of your neck had stood but you couldn’t pinpoint it in a crowded bar.

Yet during the past few weeks, it had progressively gotten more frequent. You hadn’t told anyone about it yet because there was nothing to tell. There wasn’t a stranger you saw frequently. Molly’s was usually full of firefighters from 51 or police officers and detectives from 21, or even the medical staff from Med. But no one jumped out at you so you didn’t mention anything to anyone.

You felt it again as you walked the short distance from Molly’s to your apartment building after finishing your shift but you shook it off. Maybe you were too tired.

You jogged up the stairs, squinting when you noticed a package sitting in front of your door.

You smiled. Kelly must have left something for you. You turned, looking up and down the empty corridor. The only thing that smelt a little funky was that Kelly usually left a note or stuck around.

You flipped open the box, frowning at the contents.

What the hell was this?

You stood in front of your door, picking up the stack of photos inside the box. Photos of you – laughing at Molly’s, at the store, at the pharmacy, photos through the window of this very apartment. Photos that you were now sure weren’t from Kelly.

The box dropped to the ground with a clang, the photos slipping from your fingers and scattering onto the floor. You took a shaky step backwards.

You didn’t even realise your hands were shaking until you fumbled with the clasp on your bag to try to call Kelly.

There were just two rings before he answered. “Hello?”

You swallowed, trying to steady your voice before speaking.

“Y/N?” Kelly’s voice again.

“Kelly…” You failed at keeping your voice steady, your voice breaking a little as you called out his name.

“Babe? What’s wrong?” Kelly had picked up on your shaky voice immediately.

“Kelly… something… someone…” Your brain was fogging up.

You could hear Kelly moving around. “Where are you?” When you didn’t respond immediately, Kelly pressed again. “Y/N, where are you?”

“Outside my apartment.” You finally found the words.

“Don’t move. I’ll be right there, okay? Stay there.” Kelly instructed before he hung up.

---

You weren’t sure how long it was you had been there. Once the line had gone dead, you had sunk to the floor, drawing your knees close to your chest, your head down. The box was lying open in front of you, the photographs scattered around. You only looked up again when you heard footsteps, followed closely by Kelly’s voice.

“Y/N!” Kelly called, making a beeline for you.

“You okay?” He demanded. You nodded your head but looped your arms around Kelly, pushing your face into his chest.

You felt Kelly reach over to hold you before you heard a third person’s voice. “Let me clear the house.”

You hadn’t even noticed that Jay was with Kelly.

“Kelly, we’re good.” Jay nodded, tossing your keys back to Kelly. You hadn’t even noticed that Kelly had taken them from you.

“Come on.” Kelly helped you up and guided you inside, Jay following close behind. Before long, Kelly was pushing a hot cup of tea into your hands as Jay pored over the box.

“No promises but I’ll try to pull security footage, maybe we can even dust for prints.” Jay said, glancing over at Kelly.

“Thanks for coming over with me.” Kelly said, getting up.

“Don’t sweat it, Kelly.” Jay smiled.

You looked up. “Thanks Jay.” You smiled.

“You hang in there, okay? I’ll do what I can.” Jay called, waving as he left.

“I can stay here tonight.” Kelly said, as the door closed behind Jay. You didn’t say anything but reached for his hand and he smiled, kissing the back of your hand.  

---

It had been a month and a half since the box had shown up on your door and then nothing.

The best Jay could come up with was that it was a white guy in his thirties, wearing a hoodie and baseball cap. The cameras caught nothing and there were no prints they could match him to.

“Everything’s been okay, though?” Jay asked, as you slid him his drink.

You nodded, “Yeah, it’s been quiet.”

Jay nodded. “Hey, you know if you need anything…”

You smiled, “Thanks Jay. Drink’s on me.”

He smiled, raising his glass in thanks as you wandered off to restock the supplies.

By the time you had finished tidying storage, Molly’s was almost empty, save for a few more people from 51. “Hey Y/N, you can take off early. There’s not much to do, I can handle it.” Herrmann called as you walked out.

“You sure?” You asked, scanning the room. “We’re not exactly closed yet.”

Herrmann smiled. “Yeah, go on.”

“Thanks Herrmann!” You called, going for your bag.

You dialled Kelly’s number but it went straight to voicemail. It still wasn’t late, technically Herrmann was letting you finish shift early. You sent Kelly a quick text to meet you straight at your apartment and calling out byes, slipped out the back door.

You were halfway to your apartment when your phone rang.

“Y/N, I told you I’d pick you up.” Kelly said, the moment you picked up the phone.

You sighed, “Kelly, I’m almost home. I’m just around the corner, I just…” You were cut off midsentence by someone grabbing you and you gave a short yelp before you dropped your phone and got pulled into the adjacent alley.

---

Kelly sighed as he heard you justify why you had left the bar early. He knew this was coming, he just didn’t expect it to be this soon. You had always been feisty and independent, so he knew you’d start to let your guard down soon.

“I’m just around the corner, I just…” There was a pause before you gave a short yelp.

“Y/N!” Kelly called but the line had already gone dead.

Fuck.

Kelly fumbled with his keypad as he ran down the street. “Jay, I think she’s in trouble, one street over from Molly’s. I need your help.”

Kelly pumped his legs, pushing himself faster down the street. It had always seemed like a short street when he had walked you home but now it didn’t feel so short.

---

You had the breath knocked out of you as you were thrown against the concrete wall in the alley, your head hitting the wall with a clang, stars dancing in front of your vision.

“Now, no one can tear us apart.” A voice drawled in your ear. You could feel someone hovering above you, his hot breath tickling your ear, as his hand found your neck.

You could feel the bile rise in your throat. You had no idea who this person was, or what they wanted. All you knew for sure was that he was the owner of that creepy box you had received and he was way too close to you.

You had a scream stuck in your throat and you struggled to get it out. You needed to get it out or Kelly would never be able to find you.

“Hey!”

You sank to the ground as you felt his hold on you loosen.

Kelly’s face contorted into a look of rage as he looked down the alley. Without pausing, Kelly pounced, pushing the man off of you. He saw you sink to the ground out of the corner of his eye but turned his attention back to the man in front of him.

Kelly could feel his heart pumping in his chest as he landed a punch on the man’s face. The man threw a punch, causing Kelly to stumble backwards but Kelly threw himself forward again, pushing him deeper into the alley, so as to put as much distance as he could between you and the man.

Kelly threw another punch, knocking the man off his feet. Kelly growled but this time heard footsteps.

“Kelly!” Kelly stepped backwards, avoiding a kick from the man who lay on the gorunf before Jay came running up. 

“Don’t move.” Jay snarled, taking out his gun.

Jay glanced at Kelly who was now holding onto this guy on the ground firmly, before holstering his gun and bending down to take over and handcuff the man. “I got this.”

Kelly nodded and hurried back to where you were sitting on the ground.

“Y/N?” Kelly approached, noticing the way you stiffened as he reached out for you. “Babe?”

You snapped your head up as you tried to shrink further backwards. “Y/N, it’s me. It’s me. It’s okay.”

You finally saw him, Kelly standing over you, his hand stretching out towards you. “Kelly?” Your voice shook a little.

Kelly bent to your level. “Baby, breathe. Just breathe, okay?”

You took a shuddering breath; a breath you didn’t know you had been holding as Kelly pressed you into him. “That’s my girl.” He whispered.

“It’s okay, you’re okay.” Kelly whispered, as you heard the sirens.

“Kelly, We’ll take him in. You think she’s up for a statement?” Jay’s voice now.

Kelly hesitated but you looked up. “I can talk to Jay.” You said, although you hadn’t loosened your hold on Kelly.

Jay nodded, “Kelly can stay with you. I just need an official witness statement, okay?”

You recounted as much as you could remember to Jay, glad that it was Jay who was taking your statement. A friendly face, someone you knew you could trust.

“Thanks Jay. I…”

Jay smiled, reaching in to squeeze your shoulder reassuringly.

---

Kelly had gotten you back to your apartment, and you were now sitting on the couch, wrapped in a blanket.

“Hey, you doing okay?” Kelly asked, coming down to eye level with you.

You smiled and nodded. “Now, I am.”

You reached for Kelly’s hand. Kelly took your hand in his and sank into the couch next to you, gently pulling you towards him and holding you close, planting a kiss on your temple..

“Can you stay? You make me feel safe.” You whispered.

Kelly didn’t respond immediately, instead just tightening his arms around you. “I’m not going anywhere.” 

You closed your eyes as Kelly shifted to make you more comfortable. “Kelly, I…”

“I know.” He whispered, “Me too.”

---

KELLY SEVERIDE TAGLIST

@keenmarvellover | @securityfriendly-jay | @winterberryfox | @bestillmystuckyheart​

If you would like to be added to a taglist, you may request here or send me an ask!

[1ddiscourseoftheday]

Mon 15 March ‘21

FIRST TIME GRAMMY AWARD WINNING ARTIST HARRY STYLES!! From the bottom of the stairs to the top of the fucking world baby, get itttt!! He won Best Pop Solo Performance for smash hit Watermelon Sugar-- the other two categories he was up for went to others but he was a dark horse for any of them so getting one is awesome! Yeah the grammys are shit but I’m so happy for him to see him receiving validation and acclaim from the industry that has never appreciated what he (and his bandmates) are and can do as artists, it’s a fucking start you know? We can enjoy the moment! Harry did! His acceptance speech was short and it feels like he was blindsided and forgot everything (including not to swear on TV and as pro as he is you know that means he was absolutely reeling, I love that) but later he said “I want to thank my fans for giving me an environment to be free to make the music that I want to make and supporting me along the way the last ten years”, yes that’s right we have helped you find a place to feel good, and “this is an incredibly sweet icing on the cake of what I get to do everyday so thank you.”

But that’s not all! He also performed, and wore things! Say what you want about Harry (or better yet please DON’T at least to me but that’s a losing battle) we always get so hyped up about even just seeing his outfits and he does not let us down! BLACK LEATHER, TITS FULLY OUT, DICK BANANA CHARM, AND A MUPPET BOA? Yeah he did that! Shirtless under a patent leather suit, I mean: wow. Very glam rock, very… well listen it’s just very GAY in like so many different ways??? Harry Lambert said they wanted “something darker, sexier, and more unexpected” which is definitely about that look I’m assuming and not the pastel thrift store rummage bin hodgepodge he wore later, unless Harry(s) and I have very different ways of interpreting “darker”. (Harry L also said “free the nipple” and we can all see that he MEANT it.) Harry red carpet-ed and accepted his award in a lavender muppet boa, tits slightly less out but still cleavagey, and with a seemingly random collection of other garments YES BABY OKAY you just WEAR THAT THEN! About that Harry L said, “we wanted to do something that felt British and eccentric, a little bit rock ‘n’ roll and a little bit camp,” but the people have spoken and they said ‘we think he looked like Cher from Clueless’ so, sorry Harry(s)! Esquire struggling to describe the look-- “the kind of thing that Styles seems to make wearable” klasjdlk the doubtful ‘seems’ is sending me. Either way we can definitely all agree on the camp part, and that the matching face mask (as seen in the audience shots and in adorbs pics of him camping it up with Lizzo backstage) is amazing, love that (even if he does spend way too much time nervously pulling it on and off omg just LEAVE IT) and it even went also with outfit number THREE (or at least it did as well as any of his anything went together lol) which was a big floppy orange coat and plaid pants and a THIRD BOA, a dignified (haha JK NOPE it’s still a muppet) black number this time.

It seems the performance was filmed in advance rather than done live-- there were clues suggesting this might be the case, but the real giveaway was when a picture from it leaked before the broadcast, lol. Way to make it so we “can’t even tell if it’s live or not” Ben, and why is he STILL so obsessed with trying to gaslight us anyway my god just say what’s prerecorded it’s fiiiine. ANYWAY Harry played Watermelon Sugar and only WS; well after all it is his GRAMMY AWARD WINNING SONG. Plus it was a really nice version, all smooth and funky, with a highlight of the night being Harry’s full on 60s girl group choreo move with the backup singers, omg. Those backing vocalists were the duo G.A.W.D., and there was extra accompaniment by fellow nominee Devonte Hynes aka Blood Orange (who also directed the performance and no I do not know what that means) and “Spencer and Josh” on horns (the closest I can find to someone crediting them so, apologies guys). Anyway! All of them (regular HS band included) were decked out in matching gucci black leather too and looking good. And Harry looked so happy to be up there performing, just beaming like a lighthouse, so overall- good good stuff, I just keep on dancin!

The real bombshell of the performance though was subtle and needed confirmation after for the excitement to really hit-- it was Sarah drumming  decked out in tight black leather and visibly pregnant!! That’s right, band drummer Sarah Jones is PREGNANT by (Grammy Award winning) guitarist Mitch, there’s a HARRY STYLES BAND BABY on the way!!!! WHAT A NIGHT! It wasn’t enough for Harry to find love in his own band, he’s somehow cupid-ing that energy all over the place and spreading it around, AMAZING!

And Liam comes through with not just a sweet congratulations for Harry (“what a huge moment, proud to be your brother” awwww) but also the final word on the performance look- goddammit it IS one of the rejected Best Song Ever video looks, LMAOOOO. But did he tag HSHQ instead of Harry directly in acknowledgment of how the awards system really works and that they are all to be congratulated or simply because it was easier? We will never know.

Additional tidbits-- bassist Hynes was apparently playing creative director Molly Hawkins’ dad’s bass- did we know her dad was a famous bassist who played with Fleetwood Mac and many other 70s stars?! If I did I had definitely forgotten! And more Molly news-- she’s also pregnant!! Harry will soon be surrounded by quarantine babies, dreams really coming true huh? Harry posted a pic of himself with Mitch and Devonte looking very cooool, we saw the ceramic watermelons label execs were sent for the WS release last year, and Rebecca Ferguson who knows 1D from way back when (and has recently drawn attention for talking frankly about how fucked up the industry is and about having seen unnamed boy band members literally slammed against the wall by their management) congratulated Harry and posted a couple of baby pop star Harry pics, cuuuute. Louis’ merch handlers, in response to no complaints whatsoever, sent out emails apologizing. They say they’ve run out of lanyards which were meant to be sent out so they will “be adding a freebie which we know you’ll enjoy” to affected customers’ orders. That is sucky about the lanyards but that’s customer care! Niall posted about his cool bright limited edition merch to remind that it will be gone gone gone tonight and also shared a pretty and touching picture from a the large anti violence rally held in London to protest the killing of Sarah Everard today. And finally some good advice from Bebe Rexha, loved by larries; she says she loves us right back but please don’t kill anyone for not streaming her new song! Yes good plan.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 290: It’s Touya Time

Previously on BnHA: Iida and Hadou showed up like a couple of Pennsylvanias and Georgias to bail Shouto out at the last minute. Ochako and Toga had an exceptionally strange fight which consisted of Toga being all “guess what Ochako, I used your quirk to murder someone, how do you feel about that”, and Ochako being all “I do not like that”, to which Toga was all “:(”. There was some doll-stealing and some bookcase-yeeting, and then Toga left in tears because Ochako was all adamant that murder has consequences. Anyway so I have absolutely no idea what Toga is thinking now, but I guess we’ll have some time to stew on it, because we ended the chapter by cutting back to the Iida+Hadou+Shouto VS Afomura battle, which was interrupted by Gigantomachia and the LoV showing up like a bunch of Floridas to ruin everyone’s nice day.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi hands the mic over to Dabi and is all “take it away, kid.” Over in Room 315 of Musutafu General, Rei is all “may I please watch some TV” and the hospital staff is all “sure”, and so she tunes in just in time to catch Todoroki Touya’s Peabody Award-winning documentary “Number One Hero, Number One Fraud: The Todoroki Enji Story”, which is being broadcast nationwide courtesy of Skeptic and his magic laptop. Meanwhile in Jakku, Dabi is all “I’M TOUYA, BITCHES”, and Shouto and Enji are all, “(゜◇゜ )”, and Dabi is all, “anyway so just to sum it all up, because of how much of a jerk Endeavor was, I am now Evil.” Everyone continues to be all “(ﾟoﾟ)” except for Dabi, who is all “└(˘▾˘┌ )≡ ( ┐˘▾˘)┘≡┗( ˘▾˘)┛≡┏( ˘▾˘)┓≡┗( ˘▾˘)┛” for pretty much the rest of the chapter. Idk. Just let the man have his fun, guys. He’s waited a long time for this.

y’all I have a confession to make. I am technically not spoiled for this chapter thanks to my robustly paranoid system of spoiler-tag-filtering, which is extensive enough that it pretty much will catch whenever someone so much as breathes something even remotely new-chapter-related. that being said, I like to think that I am capable of making basic logical inferences! and so the fact that for the past 36 hours, my dashboard has pretty much nonstop consisted almost entirely of this...

...has led me to conclude that MAYBE, POSSIBLY, PROBABLY, BUT ALSO DEFINITELY, a certain someone is finally going to reveal his ~secret identity~ woop woop. lmao

anyway so everyone, please remember to act surprised though, as we would not want Dabi’s feelings to be hurt at all. he has been planning this moment for the last decade or so and I wouldn’t want him to feel like all of that effort was for naught. so just play along, okay. OH MY, IF IT ISN’T THE LEAGUE OF VILLAINS’ MYSTERIOUS DABI. WHATEVER COULD HIS ARRIVAL POSSIBLY BE HERALDING, I JUST DON’T KNOW

“Dabi’s Dance” lmao. I’m sticking with Touya Time myself. ngl I had this recap title planned out for at least the past year or so. just waiting for that day to finally come

anyway so some people in some building somewhere are all “TURN OFF THE TV IN ROOM 315” and idk. I’m guessing the LoV is hacking the airwaves to livestream the reveal, as predicted

-- oh shit. UHHHHHHHH

did she always have this TV or did she get it just recently?? jfc of all the times for the hospital staff to finally loosen up

um... so that’s... (・＿・；)

well but I mean, she was gonna find out one way or the other at some point though. like you can’t really just keep her locked up and isolated from all news of the outside world forever and ever and ever. granted, this isn’t exactly the ideal way for her to learn this particular bit of information, but it’s not really ideal for anybody else either! EXCEPT DABI, THAT IS. have yourself a day you funky little terrorist

oh shit what is this?? it’s not live???

over in Jakku, a red-faced, sputtering Dabi makes a frantic grab for Skeptic’s laptop. “WAIT, NO, JESUS, NOT THAT TAPE!”

lol. but seriously Dabi are you even wearing a shirt. like I’m not one to slutshame anyone bro, but it’s just, exactly what type of mood were you looking to set here??

anyway so we really are cutting back to Jakku now, and Gigantomachia is all, “MASTERS”! which, I wonder if he really did use the plural? that’s right Machia, both of them in one place now! that sure is convenient for you huh

lol what is this with all this AFO monologuing. you’re really gonna make me read through this when I’m sitting here all sleep-deprived from election week. JUST GET TO THE TOUYAS. WE WERE PROMISED TOUYAS!!

sigh

“tee hee it’s fucking hilarious how goddamn powerful I am now lol”

alas, in spite of myself I do have two serious takeaways from this. one is that AFO is still controlling most of Tomura’s body behind the scenes, which both does and doesn’t bode well for Tomura (like, at least he’s not dying, but the long-term implications of this for his free will and such certainly are not Good). and two is that this confirms that Ujiko did give Tomura at least one powerful mutant quirk, which explains why he was still so deadly and indestructible even when Aizawa was using Erasure on him (since Erasure doesn’t work on mutant quirks, just emitter and transformation ones)

MEANWHILE ON TODAY’S EPISODE OF “TODOROKI SHOUTO’S TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO GOOD, VERY BAD LIFE”

I like how he doesn’t actually say that he can’t take on Gigantomachia. just that he can’t take on him and Afomura at the same time. that’s confidence, baby. that right there is why you always draft Todoroki Shouto in the first round for your fantasy team

HADOU!!!!

OOOH, TOMURA’S ALL “MAN, THIS GIRL’S WAVE POWERS AND THIS KID’S ICE POWERS ARE A SUPER-STRONG COMBO DAGNABBIT.” YESSS I LIKE THAT, TELL ME MORE ABOUT HOW COOL AND POWERFUL THEY ARE

HOT DAMN LOOK AT THAT

um but not to take away from this exceptionally cool moment or anything, but why is Endeavor dying and shouting “RUN” down there in the corner um

oh

excuse me. not to take away from How Bad This All Is, but!!

just a little, smol, IidaBaku for everyone. Iida, who apparently doesn’t know a damn thing about first aid and is all, “hmm that’s a pretty bad-looking puncture wound he has in his left shoulder there, I think I’ll just let his arm dangle freely like that and I won’t bother taking off his heavy gauntlets either. I mean. he’ll be fine, probably.” smh. at least Shouto probably cauterized the wounds

EXCUSE ME WHAT

TIME FOR MORE OF THAT GOOD OLD FASHIONED SHOUNEN RIDICULOUSNESS I GUESS LMAO. KACCHAN YOU HAVE A HOLE IN YOUR TORSO. THERE IS A HOLE IN YOUR TORSO, AND YOU LOST LIKE FOUR GALLONS OF BLOOD, BUT SURE. “PUT ME DOWN” HE SAYS. FIRST OF ALL, PUTTING ASIDE THE FACT THAT YOU ABSOLUTELY SHOULD NOT BE CONSCIOUS, THE FUCK ARE YOU EVEN GOING TO DO, LIE DOWN AT THEM?? LISTEN, YOU SWEET IDIOT. TAKE HEED, BELOVED DUMBASS!!

ah well. I guess he gets to watch the Touya Show now too then lol

LMAOOOO now Machia’s lifting Tomura carefully in his palm like a broken action figure and Spinner is all “THE FUCK, YOU LOOK LIKE DEATH WARMED OVER”

“oh hey there Spinner. well let’s see, I woke up from my three-month coma and destroyed a city, had my body incinerated, and am currently being possessed by a diabolically evil potato. but please, tell me more about everything you've been through”

AW YISS AND THE FOCUS NOW SHIFTS TO THE TODOROKIS. EVERYTHING IS PROCEEDING EXACTLY AS WE HAVE FORESEEN

Endeavor my dude. it’s as if you want to die here. also holy shit, that bit about his lungs definitely does not bode well for him either

MOTHERFUCKER

GO AHEAD AND SIGN YOUR OWN DEATH CERTIFICATE, WHY DON’T YOU!! FLAGS UPON FLAGS. JESUS CHRIST

meanwhile Dabi’s just waving at ‘em

lmaoooo please oh please Caleb please keep this ‘EYYYYYYY’, it’s fucking perfect kdlshk;hg

AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

(ETA: so as you will see very shortly, I completely missed this detail in my first read-through because I was so anxious to get to the reveal page, but THIS MOTHERFUCKER LITERALLY DOUSED HIMSELF WITH INSTANT HAIR DYE REMOVER THAT HE’S JUST BEEN CARRYING AROUND IN A LITTLE HIP POUCH APPRENTLY SINCE THE BEGINNING OF TIME. MOTHERFUCKER. I HAVE NO WORDS.)

IS THIS THE TIME. IS THIS THE MOMENT?! HERE IT COMES SLKFHS BRACE YERSELVES LADS

EYYYYYYYYYYYY

OKAY EVERYONE JUST LIKE WE PRACTICED!! SURPRISED FACES ON THREE! ONE... TWO... (•̪ o •̪) !! okay how was that

LMAO ENDEAVOR

at least Shouto looks properly stunned. Enji just looks like endeavor.exe just straight up stopped working

meanwhile Deku’s out here trying to do the math on this latest surprise family reveal! first Tomura is related to Nana, and now this. what’s next. who are you related to, Spinner. he rips off his boots to reveal engine legs and declares himself Iida’s long-lost uncle

oh shit Touya

it’s as if a million fanworks suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly jossed. who knew that all this time he was secretly sporting a crop top scar

also, THIRTY?! holy shit son you been busy

la la la two-page spread of Touya casually driving the dagger into Endeavor’s hero career and rocking the foundations of hero society as we know it la la la

la la la!!!

OH IS THAT THE END OF THE STORY THEN

almost got confused for a sec. there’s two monologues happening at once here. Endeavor doesn’t even know that his dirty laundry is being aired out nation-wide as we speak ffffff

btw while I appreciate the close-ups of Enji and Shouto here for sure, ngl I would also really love to see everyone else’s reactions right now. SHOW ME BAKUGOU AND THE LOV YOU COWARDS

is his hair actually turning white all of a sudden?? your hair dye just reacts on command??

(ETA: in all seriousness though, the hell kind of hair dye was he using? all he has to do is pour a bottle of that stuff and not even lather it in and it’s just gone just like that?? what the fuck would have have done if it ever rained lmao.

and this motherfucker just goes and leaves the dye remover in afterwards, too. I have never dyed my hair in my life and even I can tell you that’s probably not a good idea, Dabi.)

is this it. is this the legendary Dabi Dance in action. lmfao

oh hey what the fuck

so you figured you’d just murder your innocent younger brother to get revenge on dad, huh. well that’s nice

is that really all there is to the origin story though?? feels like we’re still missing a huge chunk of it. what was it that finally sent him over the edge? or was the trauma of being created as Endeavor’s perfect little hero tool and then being subsequently rejected by him enough on its own? because I’m still kind of confused on the part where he goes from “abused and discarded by his father” to “killed thirty people and was plotting the murder of his own brother” to tell you the truth

(ETA: lmao the initial fandom reaction to this did not disappoint. listen guys. people can be traumatized and shaped by awful circumstances that are completely out of their control, and grow up to be people they wouldn’t have grown up to be if things had been better, and all of that absolutely sucks, but. it doesn’t mean they get a get-out-of-jail-free card for all of their future actions, either! the tragedy of this situation is that terrible things happened to Touya, and he then went on to do terrible things himself. the tragedy of it is that this is exactly how the cycle of abuse keeps repeating itself on and on and on. maybe one of the people Dabi killed had a child who will now grow up traumatized themselves, and potentially go on to pay it forward themselves when they grow up. the tragedy is that the eye-for-an-eye justice that Touya is seeking out won’t actually make anything better in the end. the tragedy is that we understand why Touya is so angry, but that anger has basically warped him into the gleefully sadistic dancing figure we see in this chapter who has stopped caring about anyone else’s pain or suffering and just wants his own revenge.

anyway. basically what I’m trying to say is that it’s possible for the concepts of “Todoroki Touya was an innocent child and a victim of abuse” and “Dabi is a grown-ass motherfucking adult who killed thirty people and PROBABLY NEEDS TO BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR THAT” to coexist lol. like, y’all wanted your moral grey, well HERE YOU GO lmao, eat up.)

lol but LOOK AT THAT BOY DANCE HIS LITTLE HEART OUT though

Todoroki Touya confirmed not a fan of the Endeavor redemption arc huh. well we all saw this coming lols

anyways here’s a sexy Touya for y’all

you really are the most theatrical bitch I s2g lmao

also for real though, what is happening with his hair? anime team in shambles here. they’re probably just gonna double down and keep it red. too bad though cuz this is a surprisingly good look on him

SO MANY CLOSE-UPS OF THE TODOROKI FACES

friendly reminder that Dabi without a doubt REHEARSED this speech like a thousand fucking times. LET US FALL TOGETHER!! COME DANCE WITH YOUR SON IN HELL. apparently if you fake your own death in middle school you will never mentally age past that point and will remain a permanent chuuni

OH LMAO THAT’S THE END

we really just gonna end on “DANCE WITH YOUR SON IN HELL”, huh. very well then. you know what song to play, Horikoshi. one, two... YOU ARE MY DAD. YOU’RE MY DAD!! BOOGIE WOOGIE WOOGIE

[dreamties]

Slashers W/ a Punk S/O

T/W- q*eer is used a few times- in a positive, self affirming kind of way. But I can add other trigger warnings if needed. :)

A/n- Literally no one asked for this, but I wanted to make more HCs like the soft pastel one...so I just went wild and made them. 

I included a little bit of punk culture into this as well, because it’s not just about the fashion, but since there’s such a vast variety within punk culture I mostly stuck with my experiences in the community, and some bits and pieces from documentaries(mostly live footage from “The Decline of Western Civilization”).

Characters: Billy/Stu, The Lost Boys, Norman Bates, Michael Myers

Will make one(s) for Brahms, Amanda, Helen or Daniel if asked

Billy Loomis + Stu Macher

so early 90s, the Riot Grrrl movement emerges

bands like Bikini Kill, Bratmobile, Heavens to Betsy or Sleater-Kinney

it’s a very female-powered oriented movement, but I notice that a lot of minorities tend to be drawn to this music and community (LGBT folks, people of color, etc).

both boys, and yourself, being outside of the norm and all (polyamorous relationship, gay/bi) are sort of drawn to it!

and sure there’s a lot of really great queercore/homocore bands, and there’s probably a good LGBT+ punk scene out there somewhere, but in a little town like Woodsboro? Hell no. Sticking with this fem punk movement, while again mostly a space for women in music- it’s the most accepted the three of you have felt outside of you’re relationship. 

you’ve always been pretty into the music, stuff like Dead Kennedys, Black Flag, or the short-lived Germs- but it wasn’t until you stumbled upon Riot Grrrl that you really got into it. 

the music, making zines about local-ish political issues(probably not so much Woodsboro stuff, more Cali in general and neighboring towns) and a few ones with queer themes and hand-drawn illustrations of your partners, and DIYing all your clothes

since you’re so experienced with DIYing your clothes and sewing on patches, you’ve helped repair the Ghostface costumes on numerous occasions. they kind of adore this(Stu is the only one that will- and does, frequently- admit that)

Let’s face it, the three of you do everything together- but you especially enjoy when Stu tags along for thrift dates. 

he’s the more fashionable one, and he makes the whole experience more enjoyable- cracking jokes and just being his all-around goofy self.

Woodsboro is a very little town, so they don’t have much...but they do have a few small stores- usually you’ll make a whole day/date out of it though. driving to the next town or so over, since they have more stores and a better selection, and spending hours looking for cheap, old t-shirts, belts, clothes with funky patterns. heading out for pizza after.

Billy’s more likely to get into the music and everything with you(he’s kinda,, angsty, no offense to him)- will definitely go to shows with you.

just- imagine Billy in ripped jeans. and he’d have like one or two patches sewn on to it- one of them is your all time favorite band, and the other is a band that he found on his own time, and actually really enjoyed.

Stu is dragged along with you guys, you can’t just leave him at home- he’s gonna feel left out and sad. :(

He’s mostly there to keep y’all company- he really likes the energy of the shows though!

the two of them are such a chaotic duo though, so much so that you have definitely been kicked out or banned from a few venues. all for varying reasons. good grief these men can not be tamed.

The Lost Boys

as we all know, these vampires are total punks. so they’re gonna appreciate having a s/o who’s also into that whole scene.

How you meet:

you’re a baby punk, and it’s your first show ever, and you look so nervous. you’re dressed up in pretty plain clothes, a single homemade patch for your favorite band barely hanging to your jacket side(you were mid-way sewing it, when you realized you were gonna be late if you didn’t leave asap).

it’s a few local bands, ones you’d never really heard of really. you look anxious. but when they start playing? you look so unapologetically yourself, you’re so in the moment dancing- it’s completely mesmerizing to the boys. the music isn’t even that good, but you seem to be having the time of your life.

they greet you after the show, and you’re a tiny bit flustered- cause gosh, heck, they saw you. dancing. so embarrassing. 

David is the one that introduces himself and the group, and initiates conversation. Dwayne’s a pretty quiet guy, so he just listens to what you have to say. 

Marko’s pretty excited about you, and initiates in some small conversation, he may have complimented your little patch(Marko- patch jacket KING, complimenting your jacket?? more likely than you’d think) 

and oh, oh- Paul is out there being a total chatty-cathy, and is absolutely bombarding you with questions. like, okay, Paul is pretty talkative, but the other vamps are a little worried that he’s scared you off. and you had seemed so cool :(

you end up pretty engaged in your convo with Paul though, even if all the attention is overwhelming. He ends up snagging a date for the five of you the following week.

once you start hanging out/dating:

y’all just hit it off so well those first few days. they all love how sweet & shy you are- but also how much of a badass punk babe you are.

Marko helps make your patch jacket(collecting ones for bands you enjoy, how to make your own, sewing them on, etc). you probably could have done it w/out his help, but my gosh- you weren’t going to pass up this opportunity. Marko gets really soft around you sometimes, since he doesn’t really do this activity with anyone else, it’s saved for you. 🥺🥺

Dwayne likes listening to you talking about the local scene(outside of the shows you go to- mostly about stuff he can’t attend, protests and meetings during the daylight.)

all of them(especially David) are very protective of you. I mean, generally. but also when you go to shows. they let you do whatever the heck you’re gonna do, but the mere second that someone even thinks about starting shit w/ you?? well, y’know. those vampire instincts kick in.

the four of them obviously share a lot of similar tastes in music- but they all have different favorite bands, & fave parts of the community. which, they can’t even fully participate in,, but it’s okay.

they, individually, introduce their favorite bands to you. and they get it in their head that oh, they said they liked it. they must like it as much as I do. and awkwardly coming out to the four of them, as they argue about your favorite band, “Well, actually- this *insert band they’ve never heard of or barely listen to* is my favorite.” and their just kinda like, oh, okay. please tell us more about them. 

so it’s sorta like,, you’ve been learning all this cool knowledge from them, now you get to share cool knowledge with them.

idk. I think it’s cute. 💕

Norman Bates

so first off- let’s just pretend Psycho was in at least the 70s/80s for a moment. because realistically- the punk subculture didn’t really exist back then.

baby boy is absolutely fascinated by the way you dress (mother is less thrilled though)

imagine your jacket is getting a bit weathered, and needs some repairs- so he helps you to sew edges closed, and make sure the patches aren’t on too loose, etc

he enjoys hearing your stories of all the past shows you’ve gone to. you always get so excited about them, and he finds that so endearing. But he pretty much leaves the actual punk scene to you because of these stories.

he was already worried from the stories, and made sure you were well prepared for any trouble every time you left for a show.

but one time, you were able to get him to join you. never again though. he was so nervous!

the music was too loud! and he could hardly understand what they were saying- it was so confusing!

you stayed with him most of the night, standing near the back, holding his hand. he’d gently bob his head to the music occasionally. 

but you accidentally found yourself swept into the crowd, but you looked so blissed-out in the moment, that he figured it would be okay for you to dance* over there for a little bit...right?  

*Norman is still unsure if you’d even call that dancing.

Thankfully, nothing bad happened in the mosh pit.

you gotta give him lots of attention and reassurance afterwards though- you almost scared Norman half to death D:

He’s happy enough helping you out and listening to you though- and that’s okay for you, too. you still love each other lots, even if this particular interest doesn’t overlap.

Michael Myers

he thinks you’re outfits are pretty interesting. 

he’s a little worried at first, when you start experimenting with putting things like safety pins in your ears. cause like- that’s not supposed to be in your ear, Y/n, what the fuck

if you make zines at all, Michael really enjoys watching you make the illustrations for them(not that he’ll admit to it though), and helps to find newspaper and magazine clippings to incorporate into the spreads.

you always show michael the final booklet before distributing it

he doesn’t talk a lot, so he doesn’t ask questions- but he often does the little head tilt once you give it to him. since he’s not very privy to current events, and a lot of your zines are political, you spend a lot of time explaining them in depth.

he has no use for any of this knowledge, but he listens on, intently.

Important note:

dear god do not bring this man to concerts and local shows with you.

it is a nightmare, to say the least

Michael is sort of,, emotionless sometimes, doesn’t really care for people at all, and if he does? definitely not in the same way most people do. 

so imagine combining that part of michael, the fact that he’s also a giant stabby man, with super loud, energetic- almost aggressive- sounding music and a bunch of strangers that aren’t respecting any personal boundaries. 

you need to keep him at the back of the venue- lest your local scene may go missing.

[liquid-geodes]

THE LITTLE SMILE WHEN JOHNNY TAG CALMS DOWN AND TAKES HIS HAND BECAUSE HE RECOGNIZES HIM AND PIERCE AS SAINTS AND SAYS "Saints Family" THIS BRUTE CLONE IS THE CLOSEST THING TO JOHNNY THE SAINTS WILL EVER GET BACK AND HE WAS TRYING SO HARD JUST TO KEEP JOHNNY TAG ALIVE AND TO GET HIM TO CALM DOWN BECAUSE HE DIDNT WANT TO KILL HIM BECAUSE HE WAS STILL PIECES OF JOHNNY PLEASE IM GONNA CRY I JUST *slams fists on table*

So anyway when Jimmy (some random super fan of the Saints) decided to try and clone Johnny using DNA from old things of Johnny's that he somehow owns now, the cloning process messed up and turned the clone into a Brute. All Brutes are clones of this other character named Oleg, Oleg is super smart and big and strong and Morningstar was creating just dozens of clones of him for his brute strength, but each clone came out dumb as shit and HIGHLY aggressive. This is probably just a side effect of cloning in general since it happened with Oleg first and now Johnny.

So anyway this Jimmy kid has to call Boss and be like "hey so uhm I'm your biggest fan... And I fucked up." Anyway, tells boss to meet him at a diner so he can explain how bad he fucked up. So Boss rolls up with Pierce and Jimmy tells them that surprise, he tried to clone your now dead bestie. Both are understandably PISSED, but Boss from the get go is acknowledging that Johnny Tag is still in many ways Johnny Gat, even going as far as saying "WE are going to go get our friend." Right off the bat showing he has NO intentions of harming him, because no matter what might have went wrong, it's still Johnny. So he gets Pierce to go with him to start looking, and he's naming all the places Johnny used to love going to in order to look for him, and he's right for the most part, Johnny Tag WAS there, in all his old favorite spots, they just got there a little too late. Anyway they eventually track him down thanks to Johnny, Pierce ends up dressed as a singer named Aisha that Johnny LOVED with his whole heart, and Boss is using non-lethal weapons to try and get Johnny Tag to just calm down and recognize them as his friends, while also rocket launchering the military that comes in trying to kill Johnny Tag, it's really fucking funny because Pierce can't sing and the non-lethal weapon is a gun that shoots bees, he's in a beekeeper suit the whole time just shooting bees out of a gun, it's great. ANYWAY it just gets me that he's doing SO MUCH for this clone of Johnny because he knows it can't be helped that it's aggressive by nature of being a clone, but also because he's not looking at Johnny Tag as a clone of his friend, Johnny Tag IS his friend.

And idk Boss goes through a lot more than he needs to for the sake of helping his friends and keeping them safe, because it's not about taking the easy way out, it's about taking care of your family. And the relief on his face and the absolute joy in his voice when Johnny Tag calms down and takes his hand, and they all walk off together just fucking gets me because like, Johnny dying is still a VERY recent thing for all of them, they're still hurting from that no doubt. The last thing they need is to lose Johnny again, but to be the one to kill him? No way Boss would've ever done it.

IDK I'm just, emotional, I love these funky little gangsters with my whole heart and you guys should too

[thoughts-on-bangtan]

MTV Unplugged presents: BTS

by Admin 1

What a time to not only be alive, but also be ARMY with BTS taking the MTV Unplugged stage on February 23rd 2021 as the first Korean artists in history to do so. It’s another marvelous achievement on the already highly impressive list BTS have to their name, another mark they’re leaving on history and another piece solidifying their place among musics greatest, at least if you ask me and everyone else who tuned in and was left extremely impressed and emotional, a mix of euphoria, emotional rawness, but also a sense of warm, soft, and gentle comfort and hope.

With this gorgeously put together setlist they’ve also proven, once more, that even when you take away all the high budget stadium stages, the dynamic and explosive choreographies and the fancy music video editing, and just focus on their craft as musicians and their most valuable instruments--their voices--BTS can stand their ground easily. Their talent and passion is unmistakable and shines brightly in all these songs, four of their own and one cover.

The performance was shown simultaneously on dozens of MTV stations across the globe, some watching on TV and others via official live streams, and yet others catching up with what they missed hours later. All the promo, hype and attention paid off and they showed that it was all worth it, that they are more than worth it, and that we as ARMY have every right to be proud of them and be proud of being ARMY.

So, let’s do what I love doing most and talk about each performance, shall we?

What an absolutely delightful, happy and funky way to open the show and introduce new listeners to just how fun BTS can be. The stage was one giant room filled with lost of little details, including a motorbike with a second passenger extension, arcade games, a football game, and a sofa. Right from the get go there’s this joyful aura around the members, smiles on their faces, little dance moves making their steps light and fun--they were having fun and subsequently we were, too.

How wonderful is it to also finally see Yoongi with them as well, even if it’s very noticeable (and understandable) that he’s keeping his shoulder steady and arm moving as little as possible? After all Telepathy was “his” song for BE and contains lots of little Yoongi signature features, most obviously his knack for playing with autotune in a way that is very audible yet never quite too much, just walking along the line in an interesting way. There’s a genius note change from Hobi in the second half of the song that’s one of the absolute highlights, just like Namjoon and Seokjin doing their little minimal movement dances in the back while grooving along to the music.

As Vminnies we get our own little treat with Jimin and Tae coming together to sing alongside each other and do their little dance as well which we’ve previously seen during the Dear Class of 2020 performance of Mikrocosmos. Then to finish off their little segment, they also do this funny little thing of pointing at each other with Tae as though acting like he (perhaps) wants to boop Jimin’s face/nose from afar. Absolutely adorable.

Speaking of which, can we talk about their cute Donald and Daisy Duck accents on their clothes and accessories which add this little sense of retro? As well as the fact that Tae is wearing the cardigan equivalent to Jimin’s Gucci sweater from his NOTES on Dis-ease video? I do very much enjoy these little details from the stylists. Also, has anyone else noticed that Tae has different in-ears? His usual ones were green yet here they’re translucent.

The way I gasped when the members turned to Tae and asked him to introduce the next song and he said it’s one that is very meaningful to him, honestly, I can’t even describe it. I was so, so happy but also getting ready to be swallowed by all the feels. I know ARMY sns had theories that we’d get Blue & Grey based on the visuals of that stage which we got in the teasers, and yet somehow I still wasn’t quite ready when the song began and we were graced with absolutely breathtaking vocals that went straight for the heart.

The visuals for this performance were perfect for the song while being interesting yet not too much that it would pull your attention away from the song itself. One by one the members sang their parts and found their places along the two main walls, the lighting cold yet on the white/grey side, none of them really interacting or looking at each other which was fitting with the atmosphere of that blue and grey feeling. Then, for the second half, the ‘stage’ switched to more of a blue lighting and we had moments where first Seokjin and JK sang together and then Jimin and Tae, their voices harmonizing so heavenly with each other yet still none of the members really looked at each other, at most looking into the camera.

I love how this performance put the focus on each member on their own but also in moments on the entire group, that feeling of being alone but never quite alone, that they have each other, and that we have them. Tae also really seemed to be highlighted during this performance, which makes sense when given the history of how the song came to be. But, really, each of them was just as visible and equally beautiful in this.

Speaking of beautiful, my jaw dropped when we got to see (and hear) Namjoon during his verse. Honestly, that mans beauty and handsomeness--it somehow keeps on increasing with each time we see him.

From anon: Omg vmin in blue and grey 😭😭😭. They coudnt even look to each other while singing “Don't say you're fine' Cause you're not Please don't leave me alone, it hurts too much” it’s my fav part by the way and their harmonization it’s heaven. I loved they choose this song to the mtv performance!

As much as this was supposed to be a surprise, MTV accidentally spoiled it hours before their performance was aired, and yet, despite knowing it was coming, I don’t think any of us were quite prepared for it right after Blue & Grey.

Fix You is a gorgeous song in its original version with a sad backstory, and it’s one of those Coldplay songs that they are extremely selective over when it comes to requests for official covers or use for commercials or movies/shows. They are about their entire discography, but I think it especially goes for this song, and yet they gave BTS the permission to do this official unplugged cover.

We also know the song means something more to the members, seeing as Jimin posted a video on their 6h anniversary showing the members during a trip they’d gone on together while the song is playing in the background. They also spoke about Coldplay during the press conference before their Wembley concerts, and Namjoon and Hobi had gone to one of their concerts a few years ago, as well as Tae on a different occasion. There certainly is a level of admiration and respect involved, a deeper connection to what they were singing, which was very clear and tangible during their performance as well.

Vocal line were truly outstanding in this, especially Seokjin (who took sns by storm as the “pink mic guy” with floods of praise and people wondering who he is, what his name is, because they’d all fallen in love with him--very relatable because same). Rap line switched between harmonizing with the vocalists in their low register and did a beautiful job of it. Namjoon harmonizing with Seokjin truly gave me goosebumps (and made my little namjin heart very happy). We also had Tae and Hobi harmonizing and sharing a brief smile with each other, as well as Namjoon harmonizing with Jungkook and Jimin, and Yoongi harmonizing with Tae and Jungkook.

The stage was also beautifully thought out, minimal yet captivating at once, all the members sitting on barstools in a line with the blinds drawn on the windows behind them, spotlights shining on them from above and others dancing behind them giving them a beautiful glow and turning something simple into something extraordinary and gorgeous. They truly didn’t need any more than that.

And like their performance wasn’t outstanding enough, we also saw Coldplay themselves not only tweet about it while calling the cover beautiful in Korean (and tagging the member’s twitter account instead of the _bighit one), but also post the same comment below the video on YouTube and share links to it on their facebook and IG stories, as well as sharing the video in their community tab on their YouTube channel. 

So, not only did BTS garner big approval from Coldplay fans and ARMY alike, but also from the original artist. A wonderful moment in music and between two legendary artists in their own right.

This acoustic version of Life Goes On is truly a masterpiece, so calm, soothing and offering that sense of comfort, togetherness, and this reassurance that life will go on, that we’re together in this, that we’ve made it through the blue & grey, that we’ve helped each other to “fix” ourselves, and that we can now slowly heal and grow from the things we’ve gone through. The electric guitar, the slow and quiet drums and on top of that the members voices, all of it coming together truly beautifully.

Their outfits kind of gave me UK private school or University secret society vibes, or as Admin 2 called it “ready to go hunting, we’re just missing our Beagles or Basset Hounds” which isn’t necessarily wrong. And yet the warm shades of brown fit the atmosphere of the song really well, complement it even.

While we’re “used” to vmin having their little moment, we only really saw Tae smiling towards Jimin, though the camera unfortunately didn’t give us a wide shot to see if Jimin returned his smile, though I’ll go ahead and say he likely did if he noticed Tae’s. Though honestly, Tae’s wide happy smile was enough to melt my heart on its own.

And then, to close out the night, we got a very funky and fun yet calm version of Dynamite during which, surprisingly enough, the members actually stay in their seats against all ARMY theories and bets (well, okay, Namjoon stood up for a moment, but sat down really quickly again and no one actually got out of their seats to dance). Who would’ve thought a day like this would come, especially looking at how they got up in previous seated performances of Dynamite.

I love the not so subtle flex of all their gold, silver and platinum records across the wall behind them, as well as their MTV moon men. With how humble they are about their awards and achievements, this felt like a good moment to highlight just how hard they’ve worked, how much they’ve achieved, before they got the chance to be on MTV Unplugged and that truly, if someone deserves to be there and showcase their talents, its them.

Looking at how many times we’ve seen and heard Dynamite, it’s fascinating how they still managed to create a version that was different from all the previous ones and felt fresh and new. Their outfits were simple and all white and thus didn’t pull too much attention onto them leaving the focus on the music and vocals. Tae’s adlibs were absolutely fantastic and they all just seemed to have so much fun with this performance, smiling and dancing in their seats, obviously having a great time. We even got Jimin smiling and scrunching up his nose happily at Tae while he sang! 

Overall this MTV Unplugged performance was a wonderful display of their talents and music merits, their vocals and rap, and just how outstanding they are as a group on this vast world stage. The setlist was perfect, though perhaps a little short. Honestly, if you ask me, they could’ve performed five or ten more songs and I would’ve remained glued to the screen through it all. And yet, still, I couldn’t have asked for more. I was left brown away and so extremely impressed despite being ARMY and knowing how good BTS are. They truly manage to find new ways to grow, evolve, and showcase their musicality with each performance. I also love how they don’t shy away from trying new things and challenges, like rap line singing and harmonizing with the vocals.

I’ll definitely come back to watching these stages many times in the future and they’re easily up there in my top ten of favorite performances of all time. Thank you, BTS, and thank you MTV Unplugged.

[carriagelamp]

Book Review - Summer Summary 2020

I didn’t get around to doing an individual post for the books I read in June/July/August, so I decided to choose a dozen that I read over the summer... I’d separate the wheat from the chaff for you so to speak. Though like you’re about to find out, that doesn’t necessarily mean they were all good by any means...

Crave

My girlfriend got this for me to “tide me over until Midnight Sun”. Between you and me, I think she was taking the piss. Anyway, Crave is very... standard fare paranormal YA school romance with the added flare of being written by an adult erotica writer, meaning the rhythm and tone of this novel is fucking bonkers. If you want to read the novel without reading the novel, just take Twilight and the entire Vampire Academy series, shove them in a blend, and force down the sludge you get from that. Normal Average Girl Goes To Secret School In Alaska For Vampire, Werewolves and Dragons. That’s this book. It is so big and so so so bad. I finished it out of spite, please don’t do that to yourself. Unless you are really craving (hurr hurr) some top tier trashy paranormal romance, in which case... no judgment.

The Last Firehawk

The Last Firehawk is a Scholastic “Branches” series, written for beginning readers (grade 1-3ish, depending on the child’s reading level). It has short stories, big text, and awesome pictures on every page. Guys. I unironically am adoring this series. It’s simple and is introducing children to a number of classic elements in the fantasy quest genre, but it is so charming. Friends Tag and Skyla discover a firehawk egg, and species that is supposed to have disappeared long ago. When Blaze hatches from it, the three are tasked with going out and finding the magical ember stone which was hidden long ago by the firehawks and which could be used to defeat the evil vulture Thorn and his dark magic... I read the first two books to second graders who ate it up and read the next four books because I personally wanted to continue the series. If you have young readers in your life (or just want a fun kid adventure) then please try these they’re the literary equivalent of nibbling on a chocolate chip cookie.

Lupin III: World’s Most Wanted #3

All the kind people that still follow my tumblr and haven’t tried to murder me because of my Lupin obsession are not going to be surprised by this one. I finally read one of the manga for this series and honestly I’m delighted. Somehow even hornier than the show, but hilariously funny. I felt like I was reading a more adult version of Spy Vs Spy. It’s a bunch of short, individual bits/adventures with lots of visual gags and an artstyle that is really different and delightful.

River of Teeth / Taste of Marrow (American Hippo series)

I’ve talked about River of Teeth before, but I finally finished the American Hippo duology and need to sing its praise. This is an alternate history series composed of two novellas that explore the question What would have happened if the States had decided to import hippos as livestock...? Anyways, my pitch for you: queer hippo cowboys. That’s all it took for me to read it. You have a gay gunslinger who loves his hippo to death, a nonbinary explosives-expert / poisoner who is the main love interest, a fat con artist who spoils her hippo and is the only voice of reason in this entire series, and a latina mother-to-be who is the scariest assassin in the entire series and is obviously scheming. The four of them are brought together on a job to deal with the Mississippi’s feral hippo problem.

IT’S A QUEER HIPPO COWBOY HEIST NOVEL GUYS I DON’T KNOW WHY I’M STILL TALKING AND YOU HAVEN’T JUST GONE TO READ THIS YET.

Petals to the Metal (The Adventure Zone series)

The graphic novel adaptation to the McElroy family’s DND podcast The Adventure Zone. Most of you are probably aware of this? It’s a great adaptation, it hits all the important beats, shows off the characters really well, and still gets lots of good gags in even while condensing entire arcs into single book stories. This one is probably my favourite so far just because Petals to the Metal was one of my favourite arcs in the show... but you can also see how the art has improved and the chaos of the race is fun to see drawn out.

If you like The Adventure Zone but haven’t tried the graphic novels yet -- would recommend! If you’ve always wanted to listen to The Adventure Zone but don’t have time for such a long series or struggle to focus on podcasts then pick up the first book of this series (Here There Be Gerblins) and try reading it! It really is an enjoyable adaptation.

Pony to the Rescue (Pony Pals series)

I continued my April/May theme of reading old-school chapter book series to combat Covid Brain Fry, so I picked up a few Pony Pals books. I read these as a kid and always enjoy them -- there’s just something so appealing to a child about having a horse. It gives your child characters a level of independence and ability to explore that you wouldn’t get otherwise. These books definitely read young, but they were nostalgic to revisit.

Small Spaces

A really cool middle grade horror novel I picked up. Maybe it’s because I live around a lot of corn fields, but farm/scarecrow themed horror absolutely does it for me. One evening, after seeing a woman try to destroy a strange, old book, eleven year old Ollie doesn’t stop to think, instead stealing the book and running. That’s how she becomes wrapped up in the strange, sinister story of a cursed family and creature called the Smiling Man that seems to live out in the foggy fields. While unsettling, Ollie tries to remind herself that it’s just a story... but this becomes more challenging when her school bus breaks down one day out their own set of fields, and a fog is rolling in...

“Avoid large spaces. Stick to small.”

Snot Girl #1 - #2

A Canadian graphic novel series by the creator of the Scott Pilgrim series! I love his work so I decided to give Snotgirl a try, even though it’s not generally my genre. I’m glad I did! First book took a while for me to get into, but by the time I hit the second I was really wrapped up in the mystery and character development. Snotgirl is about Lottie, a self-consumed fashion blogger whose biggest struggles are dealing with her allergies, frustration with her fellow-blogger friends, and how entirely her self-esteem is tied to her “beauty” and how people view her. But everything shifts in strange and horrifying ways when Lottie starts taking a new allergy medication, meets a new friend... and then witnesses that girl’s death. Or does she?

Seriously, or does she? I have no idea, I need to read the third book. This book is full of intrigue, complicated relationships, murder (or not?), and a healthy dose of magical realism to keep you guessing. If you like slice-of-life, crime, and abstract reality then this series is world a try. Plus the art is gorgeous.

Summer Wars #1 - #2

I recently rewatched Summer Wars (still one of my favourite movies) and decided to read the two-book manga adaptation. It was a really neat little adaptation. The creator of the movie gave the writer free range to tweak things to fit better in a manga format, which means some movie elements were allowed to fade into the background, whereas other aspects were fulled into the forefront and fleshed out to a greater degree. It was very cool, it kept the same story but gave you new things to think about which I wasn’t expecting. Reading this as a stand alone works just fine, but honestly if you’ve never watched the movie Summer Wars you should give it a try! It’s a great mix of slice-of-life, sprawling family dynamics that I relate to a little too well, cyber adventures, and fantasy. Super feel good.

This One Summer

Okay, last graphic novel, I swear. This One Summer was... weird and intense. It’s a coming-of-age Canadian graphic novel that follows a pair of pre-teens who meet up like they do every year at their family’s summer cottages. You see them both in the awkward phases between childhood and growing up to become teenagers, as they’re confronted with things like maturity, friendship, self-esteem, family problems, and sexuality. A beautiful read, but probably the heaviest out of all the books on my list.

Wild Thornberrys Novelization

I rewatched The Wild Thornberrys movie with my girlfriend earlier this year, and decided I wanted to hunt down the chapter book novelization because I’m kind of a sucker for novelizations. Honestly, this was about what you would expect from the era. 90s/00s novelizations, especially young novelizations, are generally just a transcript of the movie without much thought or effort put into them to make them anything but. That’s what this was. It was fine, and it really let me revisualize the entire movie, but honestly you’re probably better off just rewatching the movie unless you also really deeply love The Wild Thornberrys.

The Willoughbys

I saw that Netflix had done a funky looking adaptation of The Willoughbys and I decided I needed to read the book first before watching the movie. This was a little bizarre, I’m still not sure how I feel about it. Over all, I think it was a net-positive experience. It’s an obvious satire on classic children’s novels, especially the likes of Mary Poppins (real Mary Poppins, not the Disney version) and while a little heavy-handed, it does a Series of Unfortunate Events vibe that redeems it. The story is about a group of horrible children (The Ruthless Willoughbys) who decide they are sick of their parents and would rather become Worth Orphans... and to do that, they’re going to have to dispose of their inconvenient parents, obviously. Conveniently their parents are also sick of having children and decide to do away with them as well. The Willoughbys sets up three (or four?) different subplots that are gradually woven together through a series of schemes and exploits. It’s definitely more ruthless (hurr hurr) than the Netflix version, which tried to make the children more sympathetic, and in some ways I think that’s a definite point in the novel’s favour. I’m not sure I would go out of my way to recommend it, but it was a fun romp if you want something short and off the wall (and a lot more fleshed out than the Netflix version).

[franklyshipping]

Defining Androids (Sequel to “The Self-Proclaimed Unflusterables (Part 4) - Defining Humanity”) ~ A Markiplier Ego Fanfic

WOOOOOO IT’S SEQUEL TIME BABYYYY FROM A WONDERFUL ANON WHO HAS PROMPTED IT, LETS GET SOME ROMANCE ON WOOOOHOOOO LET’S DO IT!

TAGGING: @goog-ler-iplier @bingylee and @bingy-switch

Google Blue huffed. He enjoyed working with technology, for there was always more to learn and adapt to and develop and create, but sometimes it could also be so mundane and tedious. Like the security cameras inside the Ego Manor for instance. No matter how many upgrades Blue would make to them, they would still always be in the habit of breaking down, and on this occasion the fix was requiring so much more effort. Blue was having to go into the wire-strewn mainframe that controlled everything in the manor so that he could isolate the specific electrical fault and fix it, meaning he was lying on his back, on the floor under a desk, arms and head deep in wiring as he tried to find the cause of the irritating issue. Such a task is made even more irritating when you have someone hovering near you being an annoyance rather than helpful.

‘Have you found the fault yet?’

‘No. Just like when I answered you 72 seconds ago Bing.’

Blue replied curtly, gritting his teeth as he tried to refocus on the nest of wires he was investigating….of course though, Bing was still incredibly interested in what Blue was doing. He was sat beside Blue’s legs and was trying to peer in, his burnt orange eyes looking curiously as he spoke again.

‘D’ya reckon it’s just one wire that’s gone funky?’

Blue sighed. A long, long sigh.

‘I don’t know. I don’t know what the problem is yet, because I have not found it. Once I find it, I assure you that you will be the first person to know.’

For the next twenty minutes or so, Blue kept on searching for the problem at hand. And despite all of Bing’s constant questions and aimless distracting conversation, eventually Blue managed to find it. It was annoyingly simple too, just a wire that had somehow unplugged itself. It took Blue a second to plug it in before running some remote diagnostics to see that all was well, and he sighed gratefully when he saw that the problem was fixed. He cleared his throat and called out.

‘Bing please make sure you are a little way away so that I can get myself out.’

‘No probs dude, you got plenty room!’

Bing replied as he shuffled back on his butt, and Blue grunted as he started to wriggle out, and soon his torso was completely out from under the desk….but then….Blue was forced to stop. Bing furrowed his eyes brows as he heard Google curse and mutter under his breath.

‘Uh, you good man?’

Blue had his teeth gritted in annoyance, because good is not how he would describe his current situation. His forearms and biceps were stuck above his head, entangled in thick wiring that was keeping the android trapped under the desk as a result. His arms and head were still beneath the desk, and Blue huffed as he replied.

‘I’m perfectly fine, just a bit tangled, I’ll be just fine.’

He tried wiggling and carefully bending his elbows, but as minute after minute passed the tangled wiring just did not want to co-operate and untangle itself! Meanwhile Bing was lying on his stomach and trying to look under the desk, cocking his head as he asked.

‘Dude you’re lookin’ real stuck under there-oh!’

Bing jumped to his feet suddenly, smiling and exclaiming with what was a completely spontaneous idea.

‘I’ll get Wilford to help! Remember that time when he just magicked himself outta ropes with the detective? He’ll know how to get ya out!’

‘Wait-Bing no wait!’

‘I’ll be back as soon as I can!’

‘BING!’

Blue called out, but he heard Bing’s footsteps hurry from the room, and immediately Blue felt embarrassed warmth coming to his face. Of all people. Of ALL people why did Bing have to go with Wilford?! Why not the Host with his reality bending narrations, that would have been far more logical! Blue knew Wilford was good at escapism….but the thought of Wilford seeing him trapped and vulnerable was so embarrassing, particularly given how Blue felt about Wilford. Okay….now Blue was actually glad that his face was hidden right now, especially when he then heard two sets of footsteps enter the room.

‘My, my, what do were have here?’

Blue felt himself smile unwittingly at the sound of Wilford’s warbling voice, and the android cleared his throat as he replied.

‘Good afternoon Wilford, I assume Bing has ah….briefed you on the situation?’

Wilford softly chuckled. The moustached man paced over, his eyes flicking over the armless, headless body laid out on the floor. Wilford nibbled his lip lightly, since he thought Blue looked rather adorable all trapped like this.

‘He has indeedy, but fear not! I’m not going to let my favourite android stay stuck, no offense Bingy.’

Wilford added, which made Bing snort and reply with a grin.

‘Noho probs man, Bluey really likes your company too.’

Blue’s eyes widened. As soon as he was out of here, he was definitely going to kill Bing. Wilford gasped brightly at Bing’s words, and put his hand to his chest as he exclaimed.

‘Oh really? Oh Blue you’re too sweet!’

Blue felt more warmth come to his cheeks, and he cleared his throat embarrassedly.

‘Yes, well, ahem…..if you wouldn’t mind Wilford, I don’t quite enjoy being stuck like this-‘

‘Oh! Yes of course, my apologies, I’ll sort ya out!’

Wilford exclaimed, clapping his hands together as he got on the floor next to Blue’s body. Bing smiled at the scene. Seeing Wilford smiling and looking at Blue so affectionately, and so Bing decided now was the time to leave the pair of them to themselves.

‘Right ah, I’ll go make some double checks on all the cameras, see you guys later.’

With that, Bing left, and Blue was left tense. Especially when he felt Wilford softly pat his stomach, which he was unable to even see a sliver of.

‘So uh, have ya wiggled as much as ya can wiggle under there?’

Blue flinched and cleared his throat, shivering at the feeling of Wilford touching him. Not just because it was Wilford, but also because….well….he was a particularly sensitive android.

‘A-Aha….yes I d-do think so….’

Wilford furrowed his brows at the sound of Blue’s stammers, flicking his eyes down to where he had his hand resting on Blue’s torso. Blue’s vulnerable, and rather…..attractively enticing torso. Wilford’s lips spread into a smile, and his trailed his fingertips over Blue’s stomach as he teased playfully.

‘Oh well now…..I think you might be able to wriggle just a little bit more….’

Blue’s eyes widened, and he started squirming and spluttering as he realised what Wilford was going to do. His face was the brightest turquoise imaginable.

‘N-Now Wilford th-thihis is completely u-uhunecessary! J-Just h-help mehe!’

‘But I am helping you! Nothing like a good tickle to help loosen everything up!’

Blue was squirming and giggling breathily, and then ended up gulping as he felt Wilford’s fingertips absently trail down to his hips. The threat near one of his tickle spots made him jolt and exclaim out of instinct.

‘W-Wihilford plehease!’

Wilford was grinning, he just found Blue so damn endearing and adorable right now, and at seeing Blue’s jolt, he decided he’d built the anticipation enough.

‘Please what? Please hurry and get me un-stuck? But of course!’

Blue then let out a rather un-Blue squeal as Wilford started scratching at both his hips, making him descend into giggles and buck haphazardly as he replied frantically.

‘N-Nohohoho W-Wihihilfohord Wihihilford nohohot thihihis!’

‘Trust me, this is tried and tested methodology! You’ll get free….eventually.’

Wilford chortled as he pinched Blue’s hips, making the android squeeze his eyes shut with embarrassment. His sensors were frantic. His programmed defensive instincts were just yelling at him to yank his arms free, and yet the rest of him was going wild with joy at the fact that he was being tickled and teased by the man he had romantic feelings for! That part of his system was having too much fun to fight back, meaning Blue was going absolutely haywire with….well, everything.

‘Thihihihis ihihis cruhuhuel!’

Wilford chuckled, still pinching the android’s hipbones as he replied.

‘Jeheez Bluey, and people say I’m dramatic!’

Blue snorted through his giggles, and ended up retorting with an attitude that he was perhaps going to regret. You couldn’t blame him though, the poor guy couldn’t form a coherent thought right now.

‘Ahahahall yohou knohow ihihis drahamatism!’

Though it was a retort, in Blue’s view this was a secret compliment. One of the things he loved about Wilford was how intensely his felt and expressed things. Wilford was the most emotional human that Blue had ever known, and he loved it. Of course, Wilford felt it was a compliment too, since he always loved being the most dramatic and open person he could possibly be. However, he was also looking for any excuse to tickle his-….ahem, the sensitive android beneath him even more….and this was the perfect excuse.

‘Now that isn’t a very nice thing to say to someone giving ya a helping hand! Two in fact!’

Wilford exclaimed in mock offense, before suddenly starting to squeeze Blue’s fleshy sides. The android squawked and jerked about as he burst into deep, rumbly laughter. And since he couldn’t bring himself to actually fight Wilford off, all he could do was retort as best he could.

‘AHAHA Y-YOHOHOUR HAHANDS AHARE H-H-HIHINDRANCES!’

Wilford raised an eyebrow as he replied with a grin.

‘Hindrances huh? And to think I thought you’d appreciate my help!’

Wilford continued squeezing Blue’s sides, keeping him encased in laughter as his arms weakly twisted this way and that. His love of the tickling made his struggles weak, but also Blue had the background thought of not wanting to accidentally cause a manor-wide power-cut by yanking out a million wires.

‘TIHIHICKLIHING IHISNT HEHEHELPIHING!’

Blue exclaimed, still determined to maintain the façade of his displeasure at the situation. However, people should really give more credit to Wilford….because he could be incredibly observant. Wilford hummed in thought, before he started to smile. He’d always wanted to tease Blue. He was so intrigued by the android, and in fact….Wilford had to admit that he was rather attracted to him, so to be this close and playful with him was something Wilford absolutely adored. And even better…not only did Wilford intend to tease him….but he intended to tease him with the adorable truth that he had just now realised.

‘Hmm, maybe it’s not helping because you don’t want it to….maybe you like being trapped like this….’

Wilford relented on Blue’s sides as he trailed off, his fingertips now moving to scarcely tap at Blue’s ribs. As Wilford’s words swirled in his hard drive mind, Blue froze, and started stuttering in flustered incredulity.

‘I-I-Ihi….th-….th-thahat’s p-p-prepohosterous…..’

‘Oh is it now? See, now I think about it….you’re one of the strongest people I know, frankly I’d bet you’re the strongest. You could get outta this yourself easily. And though it’d give ya more wirin’ to fix later….if ya really wanted to get outta here, you could rip your arms free without breakin’ a sweat.’

Blue was a mess of shivers from Wilford’s truthful teasing, and the fact that Wilford had managed to deduce this all from Blue only flustered him even more. Wilford in general made Blue flustered, but his intelligence and cleverness made those feelings really peak inside the android. Blue knew he couldn’t convince Wilford otherwise, he was at a flustered, vulnerable loss. All he could do, as Wilford’s teasing fingertips curled against his ribs, was meekly fib. And it was the most endearing thing Wilford had ever heard in his life.

‘I-I d-dohon’t know whahat you’re tahalking about….’

Wilford was so ecstatic! Blue was actually enjoying this, but he was too embarrassed to admit it! Wilford chuckled, and his brown eyes gleamed with affection at Blue’s ticklish flinching as he kept curling and uncurling his fingers playfully.

‘You’re really not gonna admit it huh? Ya sure you wanna go down this road?’

Blue gulped….but ultimately, yes, he absolutely wanted to go down this road.

‘….thehere is….nothing toho admit….’

Blue gasped out, which made Wilford smirk, and purr with complete glee.

‘Oh we’ll see about that.’

Thus without any more warning than that, Wilford scratched and vibrated his fingers against Blue’s ribs, making Blue shriek and burst into howls of wide-eyed laughter.

‘AHHHHH!! NAHAHAHA WIHIHILFAHAHAHA!!’

‘Coochie coochie cooo! Who’s a cute tickle-lovin’ android? I think it’s yooou Bluey-boo!’

Blues eyes were getting watery as he trembled and thrashed, Wilford’s taunting really getting to him now. His tangled, restrained arms were twitching and shaking, his instinct to fight back getting stronger now by the second.

‘NAHAHAHAHA SHUHUHUHAHAHAAAASSHH!!’

Blue’s howls of laughter were mixed in with flustered whines, which made Wilford snicker affectionately, loving how Blue was such a mirthful mess.

‘Ya ready to come out from under there yet, or d’ya want some more?’

Blue squealed as Wilford’s fingers then drilled into his upper-most ribs, and this was what ended up breaking the android.

‘NAHAHAAAAAA!!!’

Amidst Blue’s shriek, Wilford’s eyes widened as he also heard crackling and popping sounds coming from underneath the desk….and then all of a sudden, everything just went black. Then, before Wilford could even fathom what had happened, he found himself being pinned to the ground of all things! His arms were pinned above his head, but as he looked up to see a panting Blue, whose azure eyes were now the only light source in the room, Wilford understood. The moustached man grinned playfully, purring teasingly.

‘So…..upper ribs are a good spot huh?’

‘Shuhut…up….’

Wilford giggled as Blue continued to pant, but he felt a warm jitter in his chest when he squinted and managed to see the smile on the android’s face. He raised a playful eyebrow up at him.

‘How many wires d’ya reckon ya yanked out there?’

Blue pursed his lips embarrassedly, and muttered.

‘Ihi do not know, I wasn’t paying attention.’

‘I noticed, enjoying yourself that much huh?’

Blue felt like his face was going to combust, and averted his gaze as he muttered bashfully.

‘Shush….’

Wilford grinned affectionately, before cocking his head up at the android as his curiosity reared its head now.

‘Though, what I don’t get is how ya managed to fight back those fighty instincts of yours for so long. I mean, I love being tickled as much as the next ego, but I couldn’t have lasted that long! Was it because ya didn’t wanna cause a power cut? Is it a special android thing?’

At Wilford’s questions, Blue nibbled his lip. He looked down at Wilford, seeing his interest and how much he….cared….and Blue was struck by a desire. A desire to tell the truth. So, in the softest voice imaginable….he did just that.

‘…it was you….’

Wilford froze, gazing up at Blue with wonder, and bashfulness as he started to realise things. Wilford felt his heart beating faster when Blue locked eyes with him and whispered.

‘I-….I-I only liked it that much….because it was you doing it….’

Wilford’s heart was truly pounding, and he started to smile. He couldn’t believe this was actually happening. In a whisper of his own, he replied, because he wanted to be sure.

‘Why…..Blue, tell me why….’

Blue felt like he was about to light up with sparks at how nervous and jittery he was…but he didn’t want to hide any of this anymore.

‘Because….I like you Wilford. I like you in a different way than I like other humans….people-….anyone, in fact.’

Wilford had never grinned so fast in his life.

‘Well, I like you….more than I like other humans too.’

Blue smiled bashfully at that, and then felt an instinct rise in his system, so he simply followed it. He kissed Wilford….and Wilford kissed back. Blue released Wilford’s arms as they kissed each other, and amidst it they ended up sitting up and wrapping their arms around each other. When they finally parted they were both softly panting, before Wilford cleared his throat and looked around a tad.

‘The uh….the power-‘

‘My brothers are more than capable of fixing everything.’

Wilford grinned at Blue’s oh so prompt reply, and chuckled playfully.

‘Well, in that case….’

Blue spluttered and laughed when Wilford suddenly stood up and picked him up in a bridal style hold, but instead of Blue feeling humiliated, he felt undeniable happiness. It came about in a rather unusual manner, certainly, but it came about anyway, which is the most important thing. And sometimes, all you need is a friend around who’ll act more oblivious than he actually and maybe unplug a camera wire to set a scene. Perhaps….behind every great couple, there’s a mischievous, loving friend.

WOOOO HOPE YOU GUYS LIKED THIS SEQUEL LEMME KNOW IF YA DID WOOOOO LUV YOUS XX

[skeetlehand]

HI!!!!! I have been tagged™™™™ by @gheysnakelady and so here are my Hot Opinions!! :D

who is your favourite member on the smp?

I mean, i have SEVERAL faves: awesamdude, eret, wilbur (rip), techno and phil - I’ll watch sometimes, tubbo and tommy, but if you’re going by who I watch th

when did you first start watching the smp and what made you get into it?

Oh, it was thanks to the sudden influx of dream smp animatics all over my youtube home page - and tbh, they were all pretty good! and so, i was like: ???!!! and started watching and now i religiously check the dsmp tag for plot updates so i guess that’s where we’re at rn… haha…

what is your favourite part about watching the smp?

Just watching these creators make these amazing stories+narrative - it’s free tv! i am entertained! even just watching them interact, this large community of a variety of streamers/youtubers, in the most diverse topics (not all of them are really minecraft-centered, but they are all great!). The idea of showcasing underrated creators in a platform where they all have the opporunity to shine, is just a wholesome idea tbh

what piece of cursed lore is your favourite?

…………. the toe…………. 

who is your favourite duo on the smp?

Miss the ol’ tubbo n tommy dynamic! But i do enjoy techno and ranboo - they’re hilarious, too.

… Niki and Jack give me Stress… i try to think about them like: team rocket! it works! almost! i try not to think about them murdering children on purpose and more like a little evil duo who cause problems and miss. please-

who are your comfort streamers?

I like to watch awesamdude (he’s great!!! <3) bbh and tubbo, when I want some nice times where I might play minecraft myself... or just relax

who is your favourite character?

mexican dream, no sweat. tubbo and tommy tie for second second place, and back when elections were a thing, so was Big Q (he still is! he says the most brutal things these days but also ,,,, stream me dude pleas-).

who do you think is the best actor (s) on the smp?

A LOT OF PEOPLE OKAY LET ME ELABORATE ON A FEW:

- schlatt. evil president. wilbur. chekov’s gun but tragic. do i need to say more.

- bad is actually really good! and terrifying! surprisingly! because he’s.,,. he’s supposed to be one of my comfort streamers.... you should check out his eggpire!!! egg for the egg god

- tommy is good at subtleties, for someone who isn’t very... subtle... yknow? I was surprised by the AMOUNT of detail that went into the exile arc - and he played it adequately

who on the smp would you like to be best friends with?

ajgLJHGdljhagjJHGJHLGDS you can’t ask me that!!! they all seem like cool people and id like to meet them but also i am a mess so hhhhh

what are your favourite quotes said on the smp?

i have a lot here too but here are just some that I can think of rn haha:

connor’s whole: “you’re not a bad person, and I hope you find what you’re looking for” had me BAWLING aaa

tommy’s dialogue with dream during their battle was good, but when 

a) tommy asks tubbo: “but what am I with out you?” and tubbo responds: “yourself.” I CRIED AAAA

b) tommy said: “Hey Dream, Dream, kill me.” because he knew dream wouldn’t, because he knew why dream wouldn’t - CHILLS

which part of the smp made you feel the saddest?

- ... pogtopia...

- Wilbur/ghostbur (out of character? in character? i don’t know which’d be worse, actually) admitting that he only wanted to make tommy president so he could blow it up seconds later

- .... tommy’s exile....

- A lot of tommy’s interactions with Techno have me kinda... :( ... you know? Like, the pit, the manberg vs. pogtopia war, doomsday - it feels like they keep shouting the same lines at each other, but neither of them really hear nor understand what the other is saying. Expecially doomsday - techno siding with dream, predictable but also hurtful, kind of. I can see why - but also techno was the closest to learning what had happened over the exile, and yet, the farthest from understanding it.

- doomsday was equally frustrating, hopeless, and depressing tbh

which part of the smp made you feel the happiest?

A LOT OF THINGS: but here are just the ones on the top of my head

- Quackity killing Schlatt and leaving manberg like: ✌️😠✌️

- When Tommy finally realized that dream was just. manipulating him. YOU GO funky exile child, LEAVE!!! 

- PUNZ coming in to save the day with: “you should’ve paid me more”???? YES YES YES

- Sam giving tommy little tasks to build the hotel?? wholesome. Acknowledging tommy’s been through a lot, abnd being one of the few people to know most of the exile story that tommy still won’t tell anyone about outright? 😭 (and i am looking AWAY from the possibility that this is just for profit, nonononono, not in MY line of sight-)

be honest, who do you simp for? (ayo if anyone says tommy or tubbo i will 🔪)

....schlatt (who ironically, was somewhat my introduction into the smp), but only cause he was a TERRIFYINGLY good actor, and he sounds EXACTLY like what id imagine an evil president would sound like 😳 what can i say, i like my voices...? jkashdlhfgal closest ill get to simping anyway so all of you can just take this and go, go elsewhere-

what’s your favorite stream?

Hmm... one of the chaos ones? kjahdlkg i can’t decide...

what’s your least favorite stream?

The butcher army stream. I mean, it was good I loved the dialogue and set up... but like... story-wise, butcher army didn’t accomplish anything in the end, their existence was as volatile as the person they hunted and tbh nothing was gained from it, just lost and made worse. Hot opinion though, so take it with caution.

what’s something about the smp fandom that makes you sad?

Hmm... A somewhat common point: sometimes people can be really critical about characters, but like, not in a good way - just straight up bashing. I get disliking a character but it makes me :( when i don’t see reason for it. Or bashing someone’s opinion of a character. Look, we’re all interpreters here, but like.... cmon.... someone might just have a different view of a character and that’s fine! 

for example: not a big fan of c!phil as a father. Some interpretations say he’s not a father because phil never said he was. Some might say he was an okay dad, and some might say tommy was never his son. all of these opinions are valid. another one of my opinions: tommy’s “punishments” were injust, some might agree with the idea that they were blown out of proportion and he didn’t really learn anything from them, some might disagree and say he got what he deserved. all of these opinions are valid -but on my end, maybe not the ones where people go: “aww man, c!tommy should’ve died cause he’s so annoying, and he totally deserved it.” did we watch the same arcs, buddies on that end???? are you okay????

Just, i get hating a character, but it bums me out when i see someone just straight up say “this character should die. cause they suck” - why though? story-wise, how would that play out? what

ANYWAY THIS IS ALL MY OPINION DON’T TAKE THIS TOO SERIOUSLY PLEASE

what’s something about the smp fandom that makes you happy?

Yall are great!! I love how much we’ve created - art, animatics, writing -all of you <3 <3 <3 and also all the discussion about the story, the characters, the interactions - I’ve found a community in some groups and honestly it’s just *chef kiss* great!!! yall are super cool and awesome and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise!!

anyway, for the spread: i tag - @territorialufo, @an-inspired-eternity and @n-ugg... don’t feel pressured to do this but if you guys want 😳 

[potatoesandsunshine]

Campaign 2 Wrap Up: Anna Potatoesandsunshine Edition

Seemed like it would be fun to go through all the fan content I made for this campaign and try to find at least one thing I like about each thing! Kind of like looking back through a photo album. Under the cut because as it turns out, I wrote kind of a lot! (As in, 21 fics and 3 playlists kind of a lot!)

the sea, once it casts its spell (fjord speculation, what’s up with all this ocean stuff?? the fic)

The first thing I wrote for c2, wayyy in the beginning of things. We had no idea about Uk’otoa or Avantika or anyone at this point, it was pure ocean vibes for my favorite warlock. I really like how hard I leaned in on the “the ocean follows Fjord to land” idea.

so many things will fill my life (but only one will do) (post-campaign cali/jester fluff, written the night of the cali episode and so sweet it could rot your teeth)

This one is just good. I just did good with this one. I’m one of those people who hates their own work the night of posting and then when looking back at it goes, “Wow, this is great.” My favorite thing is the little gifts sent along with the letters! Cali was so fun and cute :)

when the dust does roam (Beau study up to Episode 42, 2k words of Beau poking at the idea of grief)

Best thing I did in this fic was have Caleb-through-Frumpkin bugging Beau about getting some sleep. They really... they’re siblings, your honor. 

“  “Fuck off, I’ll sleep when I’m dead.” Beau picks the bird up and sets him in the hood of her own cloak, out of reach of any weasels or startled monks in the morning. It’d suck to have to tell Caleb that his Frumpkin got eaten by Sprinkle.” C’mon guys, let’s do the sibling dance.

keep your swords out by your sides (the idea for this was, What If Fjord Has Nightmares From Uk’otoa Every Night and just doesn’t remember them)

Assigning everybody a word Uk’otoa had said for each nightmare in this was a challenge; I went into it knowing I wanted Caleb for Learn and Caduceus for Consume and had to guess the rest - for an angry eye snake Uk’otoa didn’t give us a ton of quotes. 

“ He reaches over and runs a hand along the wall of the ship. From his touch, mushrooms begin sprouting.” Caduceus starting to decompose the Mistake in the middle of cooking was maybe the best moment in this story for me. Like, yeah. Yeah. Ok you funky little grave cleric.

strange but not a stranger (Caleb & Jester, in the immediate aftermath of Caleb’s charm in Episode 55)

the first of my “the Mighty Nein won’t have these conversations with each other in canon so they have to be had in fic” ideas that turned into a full-fledged story. I still had not discovered the em dash at this point, so the formatting of this makes me cringe a little bit, but this fic was really about The Emotions Of Being Out Of Control which turned out to be a very big Thing for the Mighty Nein.

now this story was when swords were humble (fake academia mixed with a Yasha study)

Honestly I’m still obsessed with the AU I made here where Yasha was just awakening every sword she used without knowing it?? Why did I use that here only?? That might come back. But the best part about this fic is the citations; me at my most in-joke and ridiculous.

through the teeth of this tempest (Written in the immediate aftermath of Episode 69, Yasha internally trying to break Obann’s control over the course of a month.)

The most “I wrote this to cope with canon” fic out of all of them. I was crying writing this, I was so upset that Yasha was gone ugh just remembering it. Still waiting for past me to discover the em dash, I genuinely don’t know why I didn’t know how to do it and I’ve thought about going back and editing all of these but I’m just Not Gonna Do All That. Anyway, I really like how Yasha catches lightning with her sword in this. We all really manifested that happening.

nothing more than what the losers settle for (Time travel, a series of oneshots where each member of the m9 sans Caduceus went back to a different point in the timeline and murdered Trent Ikithon)

This was my longest fic for c2, so I’m mostly just glad it got finished. This happened somewhere around the time Matt released that set of notes that mentioned Trent in more detail and I hated him so much I just had to write him dying six times. That speaks for itself.

Revolutionary!Fjord was also a good turn. He could pull it off, I think.

we’re gonna show ‘em a thing, or two, or three (Jester growing up fluff!)

I really like how I did Jester & Artagan in this, even though he barely appears. Someone better at songwriting than me please write the Dragon Song. Em dash makes an appearance here but the formatting is still wrong. I Am Once Again Asking For Proper Use Of The Em Dash.

the best things (happen while you’re dancing) (Mid-Episode 97 Divergence, Jester taking the reins at the party + hints of jester/beau/yasha bc i still love my girls so much)

Jester’s a little out of character in this, but not wildly so, and it was for the purposes of a Trapped By Societal Convention plot that I wanted her to mastermind so I think it was fine in the end. I’m still fascinated by the way she unbalanced Ludinus Da’leth in basically every interaction they had, and while their scene feels pretty cliche in this... the cliches are there for a reason. They’re so fun to write.

Em dash my beloved, there you are.

plus thirty-one varieties of sacramental wine (The Galavant crossover that truly nobody asked for, Beau + the monks)

Yeah, this one’s just fun. Not much more to say about it. Critical Role and Galavant are both fantasy, but they’re honestly pretty different in tone, and it was fun to write Beau dropped into a comedy musical.

oh we were sea-bound and aimless at best (Purely angst, a What If The Fjord & Orly Resurrections Didn’t Work fic)

Made myself care about Marius with this one, y’all. What more can I say? Beau having to go from first mate to captain was just... deliciously painful, because she would.

lost my shape trying to act casual (Beau & Yasha during travelercon, another mid-episode fic, this time of 104)

Yasha comforting Beau, who feels guilty for not feeling guilty... That Mighty Nein wasn’t lying, Mind Control and Autonomy can be themes. Another in the  “the Mighty Nein won’t have these conversations with each other in canon so they have to be had in fic” tank. They really just... didn’t open up to each other for a long time, which made sense, but I wanted them to.

so long as you don’t mind a little dying (Beau & Caduceus, sometime in the peace talks arc)

Keeping with the Mighty Nein Please Talk To Each Other theme, I feel like I did a pretty good job with the late-night conversation energy of this fic. This was at a time when I was looking at Caduceus, can opener in hand, ready to make this firbolg open up about his feelings. Beau in this is prickly and confrontational but only in service of her friend’s well-being.

amber light, bending (Eiselcross speculation, Widofjord and all the messiness therein)

THE widofjord fic of my two widofjord fics. The blueprint. The better one. Finally I got the dynamic figured out. I maintain that the tower is an absolute expression of Caleb’s love for his friends. The way that neither of them have the braincell in this fic... yeah this one is just good.

and a blade between them (Widofjord happening... sometime.)

Okay so this is not as good as amber light and I will never be able to look at it and like it as much, but it was still fun to write. Anyway, the intimacy of shaving someone else. That is good. The tag “if they didn’t want me to think about the blood pact they shouldn’t have made the blood pact” is the most useful takeaway from this fic and is the driving force behind the Fjord/Jester/Caleb fic I’m working on now, so it wasn’t a waste of time or anything.

feel the ground beneath my feet turn into the sky (Post-Campaign Astrid-retires-to-Nicodranas, Astrid/Jester)

This is another one where I’m like “Yeah, this is just good.” Packed full of Wizard Fashion, Artagan making an appearance to rope Astrid into having a happier future, and the power of Going To The Seaside. Good for you, fic-Astrid.

spend your days biting your own neck (Role-reversal where Beau is the one mind-controlled this time and Yasha is the one chasing after her, set very early in the Tomb Takers arc)

So much of this fic is about not saying things aloud - Beau’s POV spends a good chunk on body language and Yasha writes multiple letters on paper and in her own head - but devotion bleeding through anyway because there’s nowhere else for it to go. The two of them go tumbling over a cliff together at the end but Yasha has wings, ugh. Yeah this was a good one.

and blow the dry leaves from the tree (Somewhere before the beauyasha date but otherwise timeline-nonspecific Nicodranas, Yasha & Yeza become friends)

Yasha & Yeza making pancakes together when neither of them know how to do so... is good. This fic is very much about grief sneaking in, but it’s even more about finding someone to share the moment with you. I think these two have more in common than we think.

oh, lend a mending hand (Caleb & Caduceus during Beau’s tombstone meditation in Episode 130)

I wrote this entire fic as an excuse for Caleb and Caduceus to hug and it does what it says on the tin. Got em.

it’s about the passing of measures (Beauyasha at the end of Episode 134, Aeor speculation)

This fic got extremely sidetracked because I rediscovered the marble machine during it and I do not apologize for that. I still really like the idea that Aeor as a whole, not just the Cognouza, is somewhat-alive. Too much magic and too much death for it to be anything else, in my mind. And I’m a sap for hurt/comfort.

the blumentrio playlist nobody asked for

If I think too much about how deep in each other these three people are I will cry. Made myself a soundtrack for those tears. 

the caleb playlist nobody asked for

what if this angsty wizard had a playlist of songs that mostly just... make me want to dance? that question was answered here.

the caduceus playlist nobody asked for

songs about home, leaving home, dying, changing, becoming someone new, coming home and finding it’s changed... this to me is caduceus.

yeah... this campaign has been fun!! I probably won’t stop making things about it; I still write about Vox Machina, for crying out loud, but... it feels good to lay it all out like this. It’s been a long few years, and it’s wild to be seeing the end of it now.

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

Pairings: Roman x His Mystery Boyfriend

Word Count: 1,459 Words

Summary: Deceit loves his dog, grocery shopping, and the anxiety twins drop off the dark sides something special.

Warnings: Sex Mentions, Cursing, Death Mention, Food Mention, Slight Body Horror Kind Of?, Sick Character, Immunocompromised Character, Aggressive Affection (aka Virgil’s way of showing love), Drug Mention, let me know if I should tag anything else.

Note: This chapter is pre-SvS, by the way. Bolded and blockquoted are actions in their chatroom, not a message.

Usernames, a quick translation guide: Andy: Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero), Dayd: carniverousroomba, Dice: Dr. Bitch, Emile: Thera-pissed, Janus: SnekBoi, Logan: Momgan, October: eatpavementido, Patton: Papa Bear, Pryce: SwEeTvErUcA, Remus: Octopussy, Remy: Coffee Bandit, Roman: waaahluigi, Teal: uwu, Thomas: shrexy, Virgil: spipples

A Very Sanders Group Chat: Chapter 5

8:46AM

SnekBoi: I love Boogey, he's the light of my life and I would kill a man for him if he needed me to.

shrexy: Your dog? What happened?

SnekBoi: My absolute greatest boy ever just helped me get up and I owe him the world and maybe some extra snacks because he's not used to helping me get up anymore but he did it anyway.

Octopussy: you absolute fool, you full well know I would've come up and helped you but you have the dog help?

SnekBoi: I severely doubt you wanted me to wait to get up just so I could puke on you.

Octopussy: fair enough.

spipples: I just can't believe you have to give up another two plus years for this same bullshit again.

SnekBoi: I'll be fine. I've did this before, I can do it again.

spipples: I just hate that you have to do it all over again.

SnekBoi: Well, I did the month's stay in the hospital again right before I started working again and I was on my second stage of treatment, but I'm getting re-admitted for another month tomorrow, since my progress is now going backward ever since my fever and there's no signs yet that the first treatment worked so I'll have to do that stage again.

Dr. Bitch: Yeah, I wanna get you through the treatment again because, otherwise, it won't go away and, as much as I love you, I really don't wanna see you every day if if means I'm seeing you not healthy and I sure as hell don't wanna see you close to your deathbed.

SnekBoi: I know, healthy is the goal, I get it. Anyway, I have some exhaustion to deal with, I feel like a corpse.

Octopussy: cool, can I do an autopsy on you?

SnekBoi: If it means death, I will accept.

Dr. Bitch: There will be no autopsies on my patient, you bone-headed little shit.

Octopussy: fine. but I'm still bringing him breakfast so he might feel better.

SnekBoi: What's breakfast?

Octopussy: well, I got you the ginger candy you like, first of all. and I made you the bagels you like and I might possibly sneak you extra non-dairy cream cheese and I made Boogey a treat bowl since I know you don't keep good boy treats in your room.

SnekBoi: I love you.

Octopussy: I know you do.

SnekBoi and Octopussy are offline

shrexy: I hope whatever that treatment he's having works this time.

spipples: Well, Inny and Dice are doing their best so we just have to trust they know what they're doing. Knowing they've accomplished making him healthy once, makes it easy to believe that they can do it again.

spipples: This time, it just has a lot more stuff because last time his month's hospital stay worked and nothing hitched like his fever last week. Or at least it didn't until he was farther in the treatment when he was starting to push himself again.

waaahluigi: Can we talk about something else?

spipples; Well, I need to go food shopping today, who wants to go with me?

SwEeTvErUcA: I'll go, I need a few things for dinner.

carniverousroomba: Yeah sure, I need to get me some good candy for my Netflix binge tonight.

Papa Bear: I can't to go because I'm busy at work but if you guys can pick me up a loaf of bread and just have someone bring it to me, I'll pay you back.

spipples: If you can make me a decent meal for work when cooking is hard for you, Pat, I think I can buy you a loaf of bread and deliver it to my hard-working dad.

Papa Bear: Oh, it's okay, I want to pay you back! Virge, you always get stuck bringing me food or picking me up things, I feel bad!

spipples: Did I ask you to pay me back?

Papa Bear: No, but I want to!

spipples: I didn't ask you to because money isn't a factor, Patton, You need to eat at work. I won't have you pulling a 12 hour shift without food because Nathaniel isn't there anymore. You need to get some food in your system, feeding yourself is important, Patton. And, if you try to sneak money into my wallet, pockets, or otherwise, I can and will put it back.

Dr. Bitch: Virgil's really out here screaming that food is important. I love that your brand of aggressive affection is still going.

spipples: It never stopped being aggressively affectionate, Dice.

waaahluigi: I need some things, I'll go.

eatpavementido: Please pick me up exactly four tiny pumpkins and a tbe of black paint for them.

spipples: Alrighty there cryptid.

10:10 AM

Momgan: If you're currently at the store, please bring me home coffee before I die from lack of caffeine.

spipples: hey, you, you're finally awake!

waaahluigi: Quick question, what aisle are you in? Because I'm going to come over there and punch you.

spipples: Wouldn't you like to know, weather boy?

shrexy: Oh no, he's in meme mode today.

spipples: Maybe.

Momgan: Please. Just pick up coffee, any form of coffee and I swear  to god, I'll make you whatever you want for dinner.

spipples: Pizza and nuggets.

Momgan: Done.

Thera-pissed: I feel like I just witnessed a drug deal.

Coffee Bandit: You did. But it's a drug deal for food.

Thera-pissed: Yeah, I figured that out.

12:17PM

Momgan: I have caffeine, I am now human again.

uwu: Good because I'm lonely, come cuddle.

Momgan: Ah, drawn back into the hell of a day off in bed by my own brother. What treachery is this?

uwu: The good kind, now come cuddle me, I'm cold, goddammit.

Momgan: Fine.

shrexy: Wait, you have a brother?

Momgan: Yes, Teal, your teacher character from your short videos is my brother. He may not be a side, but, since our function initially was similar, your mind connected us as brothers just as it has with Virgil and Andy, Roman and Pryce, and Patton and Dayd.

shrexy: Huh, learning something new about you guys every day.

Momgan: I know, I find it rather fun that you're learning so easily.

2:43PM

Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): Thought I'd share my dumbass little brother being cute because why not die today.

Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): virgilinaflowercrown.jpg

Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): virgilinadress.jpg

Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): virgilinaflowermaze.jpg

Octopussy: are you outside our house.

Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): Delivering food.

SnekBoi: Aw, you two are so thoughtful!

spipples: Well, we gotta help you two somehow and your garden won't sustain two weeks isolation. We've tried that, remember? The week of potatoes?

Octopussy: I know. I just don't have the heart to go because it's always so crowded and I can't risk getting Dee sick.

spipples: And now you don't have to, And we washed everything once, just in case so there's no germs coming into the house.

SnekBoi: I wish I could hug you two.

Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): Don't, focus on yourself.

SnekBoi: I know. But still, thank you.

spipples: And no going off on a "you'll pay me back" spiel, I already did that with Patton and the answer is no, you cannot pay me back because I'm trying to help you get better and I don't want to be repaid for helping you out when you definitely need it.

SnekBoi: You little shit, I love you.

spipples: The feeling is mutual, you funky little snake.

3:01PM

Octopussy: is this half pre-cooked food, half stuff from the store? why?

spipples: Well, we know that you're both really busy right now so we made you food like you used to make us food when we were really busy.

Raccoon Man (the trashiest hero): And don't worry, we made sure it was all healthy for Dee.

Octopussy: how long did this take you and how much did this cost you!? this is like an entire fridge and freezer of food!

spipples: Let's just say I took the last couple days off and I worked really late last week.

Octopussy: you didn't need to do that.

spipples: You're right, I wanted to.

Octopussy: you're so lucky Dee's asleep or he'd be telling you off for pulling a stunt like this.

spipples: I fully expect to be chewed out later, don't worry.

spipples: Just let me do something while you guys need it, you didn't have this kind of help the first time and I don't want to let this time be like that again, especially when I can help you.

Octopussy: I'd have hugged you if I wasn't isolating, you lovable little shit.

spipple: Love you too, Inny, you amazing jackass.

Taglist: @glaxyjellyfish @chronophobica @fear-ze-queer

[anothersillyfanblog]

These Days Part Five (Sanders Sides au)

Premise: Virgil is mute (oh and he lives in an attic, he’s always lived there) and life is kinda a tiny bit not right. He starts to realize this, of course, when he gets a secret “forbidden” friend who shares lots of cool (and slightly feral) ideas. There’s a lot more, but that’s the basic thingy. Warnings (some more-so for later parts, but still relevant): abuse, emotional abuse, burns, burn scars, scarring u!Logan, u!Patton, physical violence/injury

Ask me if I need to add any tags.

Part One | Part Six

Virgil was breathing too rapidly, he could hear it, but Remus had to ignore it for now. He squeezed his friend’s hand as they stood on the street corner together. “Come on. Let’s go.”

-

Answers… answers… how does one find ANSWERS in such a scenario as this? Remus was in his room, flopped on a large mountain of beanbags (and plushies) thinking think-ily of what he could do.

Normally, when Remus was actually trying to do something serious, he’d maybe bypass some of his plans by his brother, but… Well Roman was in on this- whatever ‘this’ was- so, he couldn’t. In fact he was actively working against his brother which, well it wasn’t really the first time (if pranks counted), felt kinda weird. And exciting!

Okay, brainstorm. Though every time he thought of the word “brainstorm” it reminded him of that scene from Sharkboy and Lavagirl- HE COULD SUMMON AN ARMY OF SHARKS!

No, Remus, be realistic. Roman would say. Roman- he could use his connection to Roman! Maybe he could disguise hims- nah, let’s be honest, that would never work. But it was still true that his brother knew the family well enough to know their secrets. He could, in theory, just introduce himself as Roman’s brother and ask them exactly what they’re up to.

So there he was. In front of the, well, front door and not climbing up a wall or round the back all sneakily. He didn’t pause to think of what he was going to say because he’s Remus. No, he immediately knocked quickly on the door, grinning ear to ear.

“Hello?” The-man-who-hadn’t-been-tagging-birds asked. Virgil had said that this was probably Patton. Whoever he was, Remus pushed his way in immediately, spying two more clearly shocked men. “Hi! I’m Remus, Roman’s brother? He must’ve mentioned me because I’m awesome.” “Ah.” The-man-who-had-been-tagging-birds (Logan, apparently) frowned. The other man… the mysterious third voice, huh? He had large burn scars coating one side of his face, some breaking out like scales in patches, and scraggly, unkempt hair on the lighter side.

He smiled becomingly, wincing slightly as he did so. “Of course he did. Please, sit down, let me get you a cup of tea.” “Uh, no liquid just bag thanks.” Remus called back, spying Logan adjust his necktie a little. “So… Logan, Patton… hey…” “Hi! Sorry if Logan’s rude (he’s science-y you know), but if there’s anything we can get you at all, let me know.” Patton smiled widely. Logan breathed sharply out his nose, then turned and left the room. “Ah it’s fine!” Remus grinned as he accepted a cup from the third man. “I’m used to being rude to people.”

The unknown guy sat down opposite Remus looking across softly. “So, Remus, you decided to bob down to our humble dwelling today?” “Yeah, thought I should eventually…” Remus fiddled with his sleeves. “Does your brother know?” Patton asked, from next to the sink. The strange man shot him a horrible look. “Yeah, course he does!” Remus grinned.

The man opposite him looked intrigued, then frowned. “You may call me…” he sighed “Prima.” “Can I aaaassskkkk??? Or no? Coz I can very much not ask?” Remus hovered his hands around, not entirely sure what he was asking about, but fairly sure that if it was what he thought- then he was being an ‘insensitive prick’ again. “About my scar?” Prima asked. In the background, Patton looked up from the dishes he’d mindlessly started. “Roman said you were blunt- it was a childhood accident.” He leant back. “Yeah, uh, shouldn’t have asked huh?” Remus fiddled with his sleeve. “No, I understand.”

There was a knock on the door and it burst open loudly. “Hello! Are we all as wond-” Roman stopped in his tracks, eyes wide, then smiled slowly. “Hi Rem, how you doing?” “Howdy BROTHOR” Remus waved “I’m good! Just stewing in ma juices!” Roman nodded, walking towards him and Prima. “Great, brilliant to know. Just wanted to come and say mom and dad want us home early so please, brother.”

Remus grabbed the teabag from the cup and popped it his mouth. “Okay” he grinned, munching. “On ma way.” Prima stood up along with Remus. “Let me show you both out.” “I was gonna do that!” Patton laughed from the sink. Remus stepped out, looking back to wave all friendly-like when Prima stepped closer sternly. “Do stop by again.” He whispered.

The door shut. Roman powerwalked on, expecting Remus to keep up. Remus, however, expected all hell to break loose.

Which it fully did.

“Remus,” Roman pretty much growled “what. The. Fuck?” “I thought it was about time I met your funky friends!” Remus grinned. “No, Remus, no. You don’t get it.” The older twin screamed “you have no IDEA what is going on and- and you just run in like the idiot you are, they’ll know, Remus, they’ll know you weren’t meant to be there!” The ‘idiot’ scoffed “Yeah, you right. I got no clue why there’s some kid locked in a fucking attic or, no, why you’re so pally-pally with the strange bird-tagging guys.” He looked his brother dead in the eyes. “But I’d love to.” Roman screamed into his hands in frustration “You don’t get it!” “I have no fucking clue what IT is! Kidnapping a child?” “No, it’s…” Roman bit his lip “you wouldn’t get it.” He spat. Remus laughed “Oh right, I never get anything, do I? Coz of the brilliant five fucking min-” “No!” Roman protested “You won’t get it because- because I don’t really get it.” He admitted. “Look, you know about this- which wasn’t meant to happen but whatever- you also know about Virgil-” “There’s more to this shit than Virgil?” Remus interrupted. “Yes! No? Let me talk, ok.” 

Roman sighed. “I don’t know, I know Virgil is a student. What’s important is he’s different from us, ok? And he lives with them and it’s a weird situation but I can’t tell you everything because it’s very sensitive to them and their household. Virgil has lived there for his whole life- he has been safe, he is safe and he always will be, ok?” “You know what I got from that?” “What?” “He, a young’un, has been trapped inside for his ENTIRE LIFE!”

Then, Roman crossed a little tiny line. He grabbed Remus’ shoulders. And, instinctively and without giving a shit about whatever his brother was about to say, Remus jerked back then immediately drove Roman into a wall. He heard something break, bones probably, and jumped back.

His older brother groaned, but tried to stand up “You… don’t. Please, Remus, just… leave this alone for once… don’t do what- what I think you’re about to.” “Yeah, I’m sorry- about the bones and for this.” He gestured vaguely “because yes. I absolutely AM about to do what you think I am.” “Remus… no…” “Remus yes.”

-

He climbed up, then knocked firmly (but quietly) on the glass window. Roman was right- they had just gotten suspicious. Which made this Remus’ last chance to do this and do this properly.

Virgil opened it. So what are we going to do tonight? I did maybe think Smash Bros but… Virgil then shrugged. “I need you to run away with me.”

—————————————————————

Honestly if you don’t know the “Brainstorm” scene, look it up. It’s GOLD.  Other notes of the day include the fact Roman and Remus are around 17 in this and Virgil’s age is complicated, but let’s say he’s about the same age. Also REMUS NO-

Taglist: @the-pastel-kitsune @night-luna @suicidaltrashbag @sarahx2802

[queensdivas]

Wildest Notes Chap 2

Ya know what I love about this movie? The fact that it goes day by day instead of trying to cram it in one singular day. So this makes writing this fic so much easier and way more fun to write! 

Was this my best chapter? Probably not. Is it cute? YES! 

Will I start chapter 3? Not yet cause I have to catch up on Thistle and For Gods Sake. So y’all be patient with Gardner. Trust me I would love nothing more than to write out this entire fic in one day. But freakin Eugene and Samuel need their moments as well. 

So if ya liked to be tagged please let me know. And I’ll see you guys in the next chapter of whatever gets updated next! 

Next Chapter

Previous Chapter 

Masterlist

What’s the best thing about Jazz? Besides it becoming very sexualized due to the fact that the Saxophone and Clarinet for some reason turn people on. I think the best thing about jazz is that it can cover so many different genres. Want some latin jazz funk? Here’s some jazz funky latin. I think this is my brain trying to calm down as my first performance with making money.��

Standing in front of the club as I was debating on whether to make a run for it or just too bite the bullet. Ahhhhh crap. I always get these jitters before a performance like this and even at just private concerts in school I was a train wreck. 

“Hey. You Cora?” Someone yelled as I held my binder tighter.

“Umm yes. And you?” He flicked his cigarette and approached me with his instrument. 

“Theo Rivers. You’ve come to join our merry troop?” He opened the door and motioned for me to go in first. 

“Yes I have.”  He closed the door behind me as it was a small dark hallway. We reached onto the club floor as there were a bunch of people on the wide stage warming up, and talking amongst themselves. 

The room was much bigger than I imagined as it sparkled with a large chandelier that dangled down from above. You could see the doors to and from the kitchen as they were painted black. The bar was long and filled with so many different types of alcohol I wasn’t sure what was from where. The hardwood floors were this lovely dark red that made the black tables look to grande. 

“Just play it cool little thang.” Ew. Thang? Really? I stopped in the middle of the dance floor as Lucas approached the stage in front of everyone. 

“Alright everyone calm down I know that we’re all excited for the new pianist whenever she gets here. Trust me you guys are going to love her!” That would be Mr. Lucas Puzo. I found him in a local music shop as I was trying to find some sort of cheap good piano. (Which is harder than it sounds.) 

“Would that be her Lucas?” Someone pointed out as I was standing in the middle of the dance floor. 

“Ah yes. Ladies and Gents this is our new pianist Cora Lister!” He popped down from the stage and walked over to me. I gave them a small wave as he placed his hands on my shoulder to usher me over to the stage. 

“Hello.” I said softly as everyone was smiling and waving. 

“Now we open in twenty minutes so get yourself warmed up missy! Alright make sure you guys give her the lineup so she’s not improvising too much. Ima go to the jon so give me five minutes.” He walked away as I stood in front of everyone as they stared back. 

Not saying a word I dashed over to the piano to get comfortable on my bench. The drummer got up from his set to stand on the end of the piano as he slid over a piece of paper. I grabbed it to look at the two sets we were doing tonight. A good mixture of swing, ballads, latin, and funk? Hm. Love it. 

“Felix by the way.” He smiled as I nodded. So we’re starting off with Give me a simple life? A Little cliche but it’s a good warm up song. 

“You don’t talk much do you?” He asked as I placed the sheet on my stand. 

“Sorry just trying to get ready.” I told him as he shook his head. 

“Leave her be Felix. He’s more wild than a dog in heat when it comes to new members of our troop. Kobi the bassest.” He stood on my left as I waved at him. 

“Then Kobi tries to be all smooth and act like he’s innocent. Y’all are not as smooth as you think. Krista I’m the best trombone there is.” She sat down next to me as I placed my binder on the piano stand. 

“And then she acts like the superhero for women when in reality she is also trying to get into your pants. As you can see Cora you’ve attracted the dogs of the band on complete accident. For the record she’s fourth chair as I am first. Chandler by the way.” He sat on the other side as I was completely confused on what was happening. So four people are trying to get in my pants and the only few words I said were hello and sorry just trying to get ready. How the flippin’ heck does that happen? 

“I should get a squirt bottle to back off against Cora! Bad bad bad!” Lucas yelled as everyone laughed to sit back in their seats. Thank Goodness. I’m not quite sure what the heck just happened but that felt like my first ever college frat party I attended. Like a penis magnet, then I left two minutes later to go home and binge watch SVU. 

“Cora please tune everyone before they go mad.” Lucas ordered as cracked my knuckles real quick. I played B flat and everyone began tuning. Quickly running up and down a few scales as some random man came running out of the kitchen. 

“We’re about to open! Go ahead!” He yelled as Lucas shrugged and began clearing his throat. Wait he’s singing? Would’ve loved to get a chance to practice with him so I know exactly how this band rolls!

“For your sake. Just follow me and you’ll be just fine.” Kobi told me as I nodded. I just do what I usually do when playing. TRYING NOT TO PANIC!

“One..two..a one two three four!” Immediately on a roll! 

My left ear listening to the bass as my other one was focusing on the tempo Felix was giving off. A little faster than normal versions of the song but I kind of enjoy it. Definitely features a lot of me but as long as I stay calm and keep my focus on the tempo I’ll be just fine. 

People began coming into the club, sitting around the small tables and waiters already serving them. I’m assuming this is a regulars club most likely. Because how many people do you know regularly enjoy listening to jazz? 

I noticed my piano solo was coming already as I cracked my neck and thought of a good improv pattern for myself that would match nicely with the song. Maybe something a little spicy but not too spicy. 

My fingers bounced up and down the piano as my attention went towards Lucas who was nodding at my improv solo. I’d known he was impressed with me when I played at graduation. 

Another glimpse into the crowd as everyone was talking amongst themselves or watching us up they're playing. Ya know I was expecting a lot less people but the turnout was pretty great for my first night. 

Is it weird that I’m a little shocked that Gardner didn’t show up? I mean I knew he was tightly rounded but thought getting him out of his house would do him some good. But that’s what happens when I try to be nice in my life. Everyone ends up shutting the door in my face but somehow I still stand..ah ya don’t need to hear me. 

The song finished as the crowd began softly cheering as Lucas bowed to everyone. He fixed his tie as he clapped his hands. He began kissing up to the crowd as I flipped the page to the next song in the set. Which should be You Belong to Me. Not the Taylor Swift version obviously. I believe it’s the Jo Stafford version. Luckily it’s not a big piano song so I’ll be nice and cozy back here this time. 

“PST Cora!” He was trying to be quiet but that obviously wasn’t working. 

“What Kobi?” I asked as he leaned over to the piano and tried to say something to me. But I barely could hear out of choice. I think I’m just going to bust through the sets here and then go home. 

A waitress approached me as she held up some sort of blue drink up to me as I shook my head. Me? Getting drunk on the piano? Never in my life! She shrugged as Lucas began counting us off again softly. 

Definitely business till I can get used to this sort of environment. 

~~~

“YOU BETTER GET BACK! HONKY CAT! LIVING IN THE CITY AIN’T WHERE IT’S AT! IT’S LIKE TRYING FIND GOLD IN A SILVER MINE! IT’S LIKE TRYING TO DRINK WHISKEY FROM A BOTTLE OF WINE!” I danced around my kitchen as I placed the last plate from lunch away. Angus was sitting in the entrance between the kitchen and living room. 

“Well I read some books OW! And I read some magazines! C’mere Angus!” I told him as he trotted over and jumped up into my arms. 

“About those high-class ladies down in New Orleans.” He was annoyed as I was moving him back and forth. He should be used to it by now at this point. 

“AND ALL THE FOLKS BACK HOME..WELL...SAID I WAS A FOOL!” Angus plopped down to sulk himself back into the living room and laid down on the floor with the sun shining through the window on him. 

“THEY SAID OH BELIEVE IN THE LORD IS THE GOLDEN RULE!” I danced my way over to the record play to turn it down a little due to the fact my neighbors probably don’t want to hear me screaming Honky Cat lyrics. I mean I can sing but when Elton comes on it’s like a party. 

It was just low enough I heard that creak of a front gate open as the tip toed over to the front door and was ready to pounce and scare him. No that’s too mean. Maybe another time when he’s not carrying a package of mine. He quickly knocked on the screen door as I opened my front door and he was off. 

“Hiya Gardner.” It was like a car break on how fast he stopped. I looked down to see how huge this box was and saw it was from Eureka. Mom? 

“Mind giving me a hand?” I asked him as he turned around and looked down at the ground. 

“Sure.” He came up the porch as I tossed the mail into the music room as we bent down to pick up the box. 

Well..a slip and a fall. That big bulky box landed straight on my left foot. If you think stubbing that little toe of yours was bad. This was a whole lot worse.

“Son of a biscuit!” I tried laughing it up as Gardner had his hands over his mouth. 

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” He panicked as I smiled at him. One of those painful smiles that’s trying to cover up that I’m screaming in pain internally. 

“It’s fine. Just let’s get this in here!” I said through my teeth as we tried lifting it again and carrying it inside. We walked into the living room for Angus to move quickly out of the way. 

“Now please don’t crush my foot again.” I told him as we slowly lowered the box onto the rug. I sat down on the couch to then look at my left foot making sure it wasn’t broken. Luckily we’re all good. 

“Is your foot okay?” He chirped as I nodded. 

“Yeah it’ll be fine. You often drop boxes on people's feet?” I tried to lighten the conversation but I could tell he was not interested. Might as well see what’s in the box.

“Give me another hand into the kitchen.” I got back up from the couch as he looked at the door. 

“I really don’t have time.” I placed my hands on my hips with one eyebrow raised at him. We reached down again and carried it into the kitchen and placed it on the counter. He took a step back and grabbed a small knife to open the box. 

“Well if that’s everything Cora.” I placed the knife down and tossed an apple to him. He barely caught it as I reached into the box. 

“You look a little famished. An apple always helps.” I pulled out a rolled up bubble wrap to see it was Mrs. Seymours old collection of her Elvis Presley China!  

“Oh my gosh!” I laughed as The King was painted on the plate. 

“Ya know I love people’s obsession with the weirdest things in the world. Mrs. Seymour loved Elvis Presley China.” I pulled out the second dinner plate that had him in his big red glittery suit. 

“Why Elvis?” Gardner asked as I handed him the plate. 

“She loves Elvis. Oh my god it’s like her passion before opening a home for all of us and locking it down.” I reached in to pull out the all white suit Elvis but it was cracked in half. 

“Well. You broke Elvis Gard. Now you gotta fix him.” I told him as a wave of panic rolled on his face. 

“Ya know..I...I..can’t. Uh..I really really..” I think the glue is in the junk drawer. I opened the drawer to see super duper glue. Perfect! He placed down the apple he didn’t even take a bite out of and stand in front of the broken plate. 

“Now just be gentle with the King.” I began squeezing the glue along the crack as he kept trying to check his watch. If he doesn’t stop checking his watch I’m gonna throw it in the backyard! 

“Alright now just hold it still.” I told him as we pushed the plate back together for the glue to start sticking. 

“Now I’m going out to lunch if you could just stand here till I get back.” His eyes widened as I looked at him dead seriously. 

“Wait what lunch!?” I lost it as he sunk back into himself. 

“I’m..I’m sorry. I..I generally don’t hang out with civilians this much.” Civilians? Do I look like I’m in the army? Do I need to salute him or something? 

“Just messin’ with your Gard. You need to lighten up a little bit sir. Us civilians aren’t all horrid people.” I told him as he looked down at the plate as I gently took it from his hands. He put his white hat on his head as he began becoming uptight again. 

“I’m sorry if I broke your foot.” He blurted out as I looked down at it. I imagine I'll be getting some sort of bruise. Not really a problem due to the fact I use my right foot for the petals anyhow. 

Angus came strolling into the kitchen as he sat down in front of Gard waiting for him to scratch the top of his head. He looked down at him as Angus was beginning to whimper at Gard. 

“If you’re going to bail on me without saying goodbye. At Least say goodbye to Angus.” Angus licked his lips as Gard quickly scratched the top of his head. 

“Goodbye Cora. This was interesting again.” Turning around like a bat out of hell as Angus and I watched him leave the kitchen through the living room and shutting the front door. 

Why do I find him so adorable?

Taglist

@bonafiderocketqueen​ @filmslutt​ @leah-halliwell92​ @johndeaconshands​ @amethyst-serenade​ @soy-guey​ @jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels​ @queen-turtle-boiii​ @mercury-wife​ @deck-heart​ @themficsilike​@themficsilike​ @deakydeaks​ @mirkwoodshewolf​