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#I might write a few things later when I have the time
gloomwitchwrites · 1 day
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Hello, hope you're a having a good day
Could you write something about 141 x reader where the sparring session turns a little too not your usual sparring (if you know what I mean). The reader and them being all sweaty and shit and like the sexual tension that's been there for a while. This idea has been plaguing my mind since forever. Thank youuuu
Haha! Yes! Omg, I love it. Okay, for this, I didn't go full smut. When someone mentions sexual tension, I tend to hyperfocus on that and want to bathe in it. Give me naughty thoughts and flirting-maybe even some actual physical contact that borders on dangerous territory. Give me the yearning! I want to giggle and kick my feet and think about what might happen later.
So, I indulged in that regard! I had lots of fun with this. Thank you so much for sending it in!!!
For the masterlist and how to submit your own request, click HERE
Task Force 141 x TF141!Female Reader
Content & Warnings (per the warnings MDNI): swearing, suggestive themes, knife play, grinding, rough kissing, caught in the act, training, naughty thoughts, mutual yearning
Word Count: 2.4k
ao3 // main masterlist // imagines & what if masterlist
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John "Soap" MacTavish
“Come on. Come at me.”
Soap rolls his shoulders and then brings his fists up in a fighting stance. He makes a “go on” gestured with his hands.
Every muscle in your body is sore. Tired doesn’t even begin to describe how you’re feeling. But you want to best Soap. He’s been on your ass for weeks now—insisting that the two of you should spar together. It’s not the sparring that makes you warm and tingly but the way he suggests it.
Always leaning in. Standing far too close. Bumping your shoulder with his.
Soap waits, but you’re not sure how to proceed. So far, you’ve been completely unsuccessful. As if knowing all your moves, Soap has dodged each blow and kick, effortlessly taking you down to the mat every time you thinking you’ve ensnared him.
Stealth is more your thing. Creeping around in the shadows. Taking out opponents from afar. A sniper scope is your friend. Hand-to-hand isn’t.
You lunge for him and Soap steps back. Fist missing him, you sidestep and go for a jab in the stomach. Soap slaps your hand away, and you want to yell in frustration.
“Sloppy today,” chides Soap, grinning like this amuses him.
It probably does. He’s one for a good laugh.
This time you feign, and Soap takes it, moving in. You’re ready for him, turning out of his swing to duck beneath and then aim for the face. Soap rises to block, and opens a clear line to his groin.
Fucking beautiful.
Lifting your foot, you don’t tap him hard, just enough for his cheeks to go pink. Soap grunts, and you chuckle.
“Shouldn’t have left yourself—”
With an oof, your back smacks against the tumble mat beneath you. Soaps snags your wrists and pins them above your head. You go to kick out at him, but Soap’s knees are between your legs. He shoves them wider.
You’re completely trapped beneath him.
And in a completely inappropriate position.
From where you’re pinned, you notice the small beads of sweat on his brow and how a few pieces of hair stick to his skin. Though his chest is covered by a shirt, it’s snug, with every muscle on display. Those powerful thighs of his press against yours in such a way that you’re imagining nothing between your bodies.
Would he feel this powerful over you if the two of you were elsewhere? Perhaps, somewhere more private. Somewhere without a tumble mat. Somewhere with a bed.
“Can’t harm the goods, love,” says Soap, his voice husky. You’re not sure if it’s from the close contact or from the tap you gave his crotch.
“Then don’t leave them vulnerable,” you reply, almost not recognizing the sound of your own voice. It too is husky as if dipped in desire.
The middle of Soap’s brow scrunches slightly. His gaze travels downward to linger on your lips and then further still until you sense him admiring more than he is observing.
“Soap—”
His gaze snaps upward. “Johnny,” he corrects. “Think we’re on closer terms.”
“Are we?” you ask, as his hips start to relax.
The press of him against you is apparent, and the hardness there is poking at you. Insistent. And you don’t want to ignore it.
Instead, you press upward, grinding against him.
Soap—no—Johnny, makes a sound in his throat.
One moment you’re under him and then you’re in his lap, the two of you sitting up, staring into each other’s eyes. Your heart hammers in your chest, and your hands fists the front of his shirt.
“You—”
“Are we interrupting something?”
You and Johnny turn just as Ghost and Gaz enter the gym. Gaz has a towel draped over his shoulder. The water bottle he holds it half-way towards his mouth before he freezes, gaze locked on you and Johnny.
Ghost cocks his head, arms crossed over his chest.
You’re speechless. Lost. Your mind hasn’t caught up.
But Johnny’s has.
With a twist, Johnny rolls and then lightly tosses you off him as if the two of you were simply practicing and not staring into each other’s eyes.
“You want a go, Lt?” asks Johnny.
Kyle "Gaz" Garrick
“You up for another round?” asks Kyle.
The man is grinning like he could do this all day. You’re sore everywhere—ready to collapse from exhaustion. Hand-to-hand combat is not your thing which is why you’re here in the training room with Kyle.
Yes, you need practice, but you’ve also had your eye on him, admiring him when you think no one is looking. It’s an excuse for some alone time.
“I’d rather eat glass,” you mutter, snatching up your water bottle and drinking the last of it.
“Hate me that much?” he teases.
“So much so that I wanted to spend the afternoon beating your ass.”
Kyle bursts out laughing. He snatches the water bottle out of your hand and aims it at you, squeezing. There’s nothing in it. A few measly drops hit your face and then you lunge for him. Kyle jumps back and extends his arms outward.
“One more round.” He winks. “Come on, love.”
He’s being cheeky, and your blood is pumping.
Kyle tosses your water bottle to the side as you stride forward. His arms go up, and then the two of you are nothing but flying fists and feet. He’s faster, blocking every blow you send his way.
Sweat accumulates on your brow and on the back of your neck, dripping down your spine. You lick your lips, taste the salt from the sweat.
You duck. Swing. Kyle snatches your wrist and twists, pinning your arm behind you. With a sharp jab of your elbow, you nail Kyle in the stomach, freeing yourself.
As you spin to lash out, Kyle is right there, in your space, blocking all movement. You try to step back, to allow space in your next strike, but Kyle rushes in. The two of you are twisted up. Falling. Slamming into the mat on the floor.
You shove and Kyle resists, his strength outmatching yours. With cheek pressed into the mat, you have nowhere to go. You’re completely on your stomach, and all of Kyle’s weight is on you. He breathes heavily, chest heaving. You feel his breath against your skin, and the contact only sends your skin into a shiver.
Your mind drifts, lingering in places it shouldn’t. Worse—Kyle is aroused. His hardness pokes at your ass. But whether he notices or not is unclear.
“You’re improving,” he says.
“I have a good teacher.”
Kyle makes a noise that sounds like agreement. Every muscle is tense, and even Kyle’s hold on you seems laced with something harsh. But then it eases. Softens. His grip loosens enough that you roll onto your side, glancing up at him.
He is so goddamn close. Just a gentle tilt of the head and your lips would meet his. It wouldn’t be that hard. He’s right there.
Kyle blinks, and then his gaze trails downward, lingering on your lips.
“We,” he begins. “We shouldn’t.”
“Why?”
His thumb traces along the side of your throat, and your eyelids flutter with contentment. A little moan escapes you, and you hear Kyle’s sharp inhale.
“Fuck,” he mutters. “Fuck it.”
His thumb becomes his whole hand. Holding you in place, Kyle goes all in, claiming your lips with his. It is dominating, and you happily give in to him.
John Price
Your back hits the tumble mat with a sharp slap. The exposed portions of your shoulders and back sting from the contact.
"Again."
Groaning, you push up to a seated position. "We've been at this for hours."
"And you need practice," counters Price.
He's hatless. And shirtless. Only in cargo pants and boots, Captain Price's bare skin glistens with sweat. You won't pretend that the sight of him like this doesn't intrigue you. For months now you've been observing Captain Price in more than just a professional manner. It's hard not to, and the sweat-drenched man before you isn't helping things.
Captain Price runs his fingers through his hair, taking a step back. The casualness to the movement causes your stomach to twist with desire. Your body betrays you, and you have no idea if these feelings are entirely one-sided. Sometimes you think you might gleam a notion of his thoughts, but it always manages to slip through your grasp.
Price offers his hand, and an idea forms.
You extend yours, but don't close the distance. Price is the one that leans forward to do so. It's the perfect opportunity. When your fingers close around his, you tug back, throwing him off balance.
Price tips forward, and you turn to the side as he crashes down to the mat. In one fluid movement, you roll Price onto his back and straddle his stomach.
"Never let your guard down. That's what you always say."
Price's eyes widen slightly before softening. The corner of his mouth twitches into a hint of amusement. It immediately sends heat flaring through you.
"I do," he replies, and it's nearly a coo.
That smirk of his widens into an actual smile, and then it's you on your back and Price straddling. You strike out with an elbow but Price catches your swing, trapping your arms above your head. He bends forward a bit, and it is then that you feel the stiffness against your stomach.
Price makes no move to hide it, and you don’t dare glance downward.
"You need to do better-"
"Captain."
Price immediately recoils, sitting up and releasing your arms. You twist to look behind you, only to find Ghost and Soap standing nearby. Ghost is ever the silent observer, but Soap's head is slightly tilted to the side, the middle of his brow pinched like he's not sure what's happening.
"Meeting starts in five,” says Soap. “Came to find you."
Price coughs and then he's off you, kneeling and offering you a hand again. You don't try to knock him down.
"Just going over some pointers,” replies Price.
"Pointers?" deadpans Ghost and you shoot him a look. He shrugs at you, gaze lingering before moving to his captain.
"Give me ten minutes. Shower. Then I'll be there."
Captain Price gives you a quick glance before walking off with Soap. Ghost crosses his arms over his chest and just stares.
“What?" you snap
"Pointers," he repeats.
"Oh, fuck off, Simon."
He chuckles and turns to follow the two out of the training room.
Simon "Ghost" Riley
"Your posture is terrible."
"That's very helpful, Lieutenant,” you deadpan.
"Are you sassing me?"
"No."
Simon shakes his head and sighs. “Can’t throw a knife accurately if you’re hunched like a goblin.”
“Goblin,” you mutter under your breath. “Asshole.”
“What was that?”
You clear your throat. “Seems easy, Lieutenant. You just throw the pointy end at the enemy.”
Simon grunts and then grabs your raised arm. "You won't hit anything standing like that."
You resist his pull but you're outmatch when it comes to strength. With one hand on your arm and one on your waist, Simon shifts you into position.
"Like this," he instructs, bringing your arm back. "Firm grip. Feet pointed forward." Simon releases your arm but his hand on your waist remains. "Throw. At the target."
You let the knife fly. It strikes just right of the bullseye.
"Again,” nods Simon.
"Really?"
Simon slowly drops his hand from your waist, the tips of fingers lingering a second longer than necessary.
Removing a knife from his boot, Simon flips it end over end. "We could hone your skills a different way."
"What way?"
“Grab your knife and find out.”
Stalking toward the bullseyes, you yank out the knife, joining Simon in the sparring ring. He bends at the knee, crouching into a fight stance. You mimic the movement.
Simon lunges first and you sidestep. But he's quick for such a large man. He moves around and behind you so fast he's almost a blur.
Grabbing your wrist, Simon lightly twists and pins you against his front, the knife tip pointed at your throat.
"Again,” he growls.
Simon lightly shoves you away. You spin. Striking out. He slaps your arm down and raises his own, the knife tip pointed at your throat for a second time.
"Again."
Showing your teeth, you charge at him, barreling into him at the middle. Simon staggers but doesn't faulter. He attempts to toss you off him, but you remain firm, grabbing hold.
This unloads him, his weight toppling with you. The two of you go down. Simon rolls you onto your back, his body pressed to yours, knife at your throat again.
"Better,” he says. “Still needs improvement."
You go to shove him off, but Simon doesn't budge. He remains where he is, and every point of contact is like an electrical spark. Even his face is close, balaclava nearly scratching against your skin. There is not part of him you’re not touching.
Awareness settles in.
Simon is all hardness over you.
"Have any tips you can give me?" you reply.
His gaze slowly lowers to your lips. His hips shift slightly, something stiff poking against your inner thigh.
“I have one,” he murmurs.
Bet I can guess.
“How do you want it?” he continues.
"You're the expert," you reply softly, hooking your leg over the back of his.
It's an invitation, one you aren't sure he'll take.
There’s a brief pause, and then Simon hums in agreement. It’s a pleased sound, one that instantly makes you shiver. Without taking the knife from your throat, he closes the distance, lips pressing against yours through the balaclava.
Heat erupts, the knife in your hand forgotten on the floor as you grab at him, fingers digging in.
It's only a tease. You want the real thing.
"What's the tip?" you ask once he breaks the connection.
Simon answers by grinding his hips against yours.
That one. Got it.
“We should—”
A door slams from somewhere down the hall. Simon’s head snaps up. The knife disappears, and then Simon is pushing himself away, kneeling beside you. His head is turned toward the main doors, but no one enters.
“It’s late,” you say. No one should be coming this way.
He turns back to you. “Your knife skills are shit.”
You groan. “I know. Goblin hunch. Got it.”
Simon snorts, and offers his hand. You take it, and he pulls you into a seated position. “Just a few more rounds,” he says, and then with a husky twinge to his tone, “and then I’ll go make sure the locker room is clear.”
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enhasparadise · 2 days
Text
SLEEPYHEAD ˒˒ ﹙ enhypen ! ﹚
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╰┈⪼ in which you sleep with your boyfriend for the very first time.
pairing ‎⸝⸝⸝ enha members! x reader! 𓄷 iηcℓudᥱs 𓈓 none!
genre﹙💬﹚⸝⸝⸝ scenerios/headcannons, soft, established relationship
warnings ‎⸝⸝⸝ cute members reactions, caring!heeseung, soft scenarios, reassuring!jungwon, cuddling, hair playing, using of pet names (sweetheart, princess, pretty girl, love, mi amor..) neck kisses, clingy!sunoo
wc ‎⸝⸝⸝ 3618 words
rain’s note ‎⸝⸝⸝ this is the first time I write something like this so I hope it’s good ! enjoy and spend a good time (Niki’s scenario actually is my favorite 🤭)
all feedback and reblogs are welcome! ♡
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𓏲 𖧷ˊ HEESEUNG
autumn days have always been favorites for both of you since you use it as an excuse to spend the day together, cuddle up together and watch lots of movies. a blankets covering your bodies while a bowl of popcorn was on Heeseung's lap, and two hot chocolates were placed on the living room table.
but for once, Heeseung had this desire to organize all of this in the evening, which amounted to saying that you were going to sleep at his place. and that for the first time, which made you quite nervous but you didn't refuse the idea on the contrary, you accepted straight away.
that's why you were currently in Heeseung's bed, the blanket covering your body while your head was against his chest.
you were watching one of his films that he had offered you when you arrived. and only a few minutes later Heeseung had let his arm slide down your waist only to pull you lightly against him.
"are you comfortable enough sweetheart?" Heeseung asked you, wanting to make sure everything was perfect and that you weren't uncomfortable, noticing a shake of his head a smile appeared on his lips. "If you need anything, tell me, I prefer to know that you are really comfortable with the idea of ​​sleeping with me"
"everything is perfect Heeseung. I have cuddles, a great movie and I'm warm against you so I don't need anything else" you ended up responding while your head was still resting against his chest. "mh or maybe a cup of hot chocolate.." you ended up saying.
the moment was really cute, everything he had done for you just before, bringing you countless stuffed animals, making sure you felt comfortable enough in his bed and he even insisted on giving you the most space in the bed, even if it means sleeping in the corner of the bed.
"I'll go right away" he replied upon hearing your request, leaving the bed to go to the kitchen and prepare everything you wanted or what might make you want during the evening. When he came back, he knocked on the door and waited for your response before coming in, noticing at the same time that you had finally worn out your pajamas, which made him smile.
the rest of the evening was absolutely magical, everything was perfect and Heeseung continued to make sure you were comfortable. when you finally fell asleep the movie wasn't even finished, it was when he sat up slightly that he noticed your eyes closed while your head was still against his chest. and, respecting your sleep, he turned off the television and the light next to his bed before trying to fall asleep himself, holding you tenderly against him.
𓏲 𖧷ˊ JAY
when you asked Jay to spend the night at your place, he looked at you without reacting for a few seconds and an embarrassed laugh left your lips. it was the first time you were going to sleep together and, unfortunately, it wasn't him who proposed but you.
"are you sure princess?" he ended up asking you, to which you nodded, certain of what you had just suggested to him. "We've been together for three months Jay, we have to sleep together one day so why not tonight?"
Jay had absolutely nothing against the idea, quite the contrary, but at the moment he was quite nervous. He had never slept with anyone before so he just hoped he wouldn't make a fool of himself in front of you tonight, that was probably the last thing he wanted.
as he entered your room a smile appeared on his lips. "your room looks a lot like you, it's really cute and colorful. I love all the photos hanging on the wall, it's really cute" he said before moving closer and noticing that most of the photos were you two, on every date you had had since the start of your relationship.
When it was time to sleep, he didn't necessarily know how to go about it. should he take you in his arms? sit next to you and wait for permission to do anything? he wasn't unfamiliar with the idea of ​​being with someone, only he had always been nervous about sleeping with his girlfriend and this time you were the first one he was going to sleep with.
noticing how uncomfortable he seemed to be, you ended up taking his hands in yours and sliding them around your waist, showing him that there was nothing wrong. "normally it's up to the girl to be in this state, not you Jay.." you said before laughing but you were quickly stopped because Jay's lips were pressed against yours.
"I'm not uncomfortable.." he replied, finally separating himself from your lips, "I just hope the night goes well, it's the first time we've slept together so I don't want to ruin the moment."
and he wasn't wrong about that. Jay had always been the type to do everything perfectly, so he obviously wished that the first night with you would be as perfect as he had imagined.
"well.. you're with me and I'm in your arms so this is probably the best night I'll ever have" a smile appeared on your lips as you said that while you looked at Jay in the most adorable way possible.
the night continued and strangely, after hearing your words Jay was much more at ease and, in fact, he hadn't stopped kissing you. so much so that you couldn't even remember when you fell asleep, but indeed, it was the best night you could have had.
𓏲 𖧷ˊ JAKE
to say that Jake hadn't thought about this moment would possibly be a lie. as soon as you accepted his proposal, he began to imagine how this could happen.
And inevitably when the day came he had spent most of the day thinking about it. How could he not think about it when you will be against him, in his arms for the whole night?
"Jake are you even listening to me?" Did you end up saying, which made him leave his reverie, "I really don't want to fail my exams but I have the impression that I won't be able to do it.."
"Ah no, we're not talking about exams this evening and you know that," he replied, taking out his keys and opening the door. "Tonight is a romantic evening so no talking about exams"
"But Jake it's not funny! I'm really afraid of missing them! Imagine I..." quickly one of Jake's hands was on your lips and, once again you asked why he was so keen that you weren't talking about exams. But when you raised your head you quickly understood.
"Not another word about exams or you end up sleeping on the couch instead of with me" he used as a way to make you stop talking while removing his hand from his lips.
"It's called blackmail Jake!" You finally said but he didn't want to listen to you anymore. Instead he just laughed as he picked you up from the ground and headed towards his room. "And what's more, it's a hostage-taking!" Did you scream.
"For this to be a hostage situation, you would have to disagree, except that you agreed to sleep with me"
Soon you were both under the covers, and after a little bit of arguing because of his lame jokes, you both ended up in each other's arms.
You had nothing against sleeping with Jake, it was one of the things you looked forward to but strangely once in his arms, you felt a knot in your stomach because of shyness and you found the slightest way to hide from him.
And strangely he didn't make fun of you, he found you adorable, quite the contrary. And knowing that you were quite reactive, he allowed himself to come and tickle you, which quickly made you react. "Jake stop, that's painful!" you said suddenly which directly made him laugh.
"I'll stop if you're not so shy, sweetie," he allowed himself to respond while continuing his tickling, which quickly stopped since you were moving a little too much and he was afraid of getting hit.
And fortunately he ended up stopping because you quickly returned to his arms, and it was when he raised your head that he realized how lucky he was to have you. And quickly he kissed you.
He even allowed himself to come and kiss your neck, to tease you a little before you ended up sleeping and, seeing how red you had become, he laughed and kissed the tip of your nose. "Strangely, Madam doesn't say anything anymore."
"Madam says you need to sleep, just like me.." you responded by separating from him, afraid that he would do it again, but you quickly regretted your decision and returned to his arm.
And it was after a long moment of cuddling that you both fell asleep. And Jake was right, the moment was surely as pleasant and perfect as he had imagined during the day. It was even much better than he had imagined.
𓏲 𖧷ˊ SUNGHOON
maybe Sunghoon used the fact that it was raining heavily to make you stay at his place for the night. he had always been the type to be romantic for any occasion, and, the idea of ​​you having to walk home while it was raining like this was almost impossible for him.
except that, since nothing was prepared in advance you had no business of your own for the night and to tell the truth you felt quite stressed since, although Sunghoon had used the rain as an excuse, you had never slept with him before and didn't know how everything was going to happen.
except that, because you were so lost in your thoughts, you didn't realize that Sunghoon was going back and forth throughout his apartment to find you things for the night. and it was when he came back to you that you noticed that he had a girl's pajamas in his hands.
"How come you have pajamas already ready for me Sunghoon?" you asked when you were quite confused about where these pajamas came from although you ended up taking them in your hands.
"I bought one a few weeks ago thinking that you would end up sleeping at my house... I just didn't think that it would be because of a rain" he replied, laughing softly, perhaps realizing- It's odd that he keeps some pajamas for you, just in case.
"oh.. that's really nice Sunghoon thank you very much" you replied with a smile, getting up to place a kiss on his lips before heading to his bathroom so you can change. and you had barely put it on when you noticed that Sunghoon had chosen the right size, so he remembered your clothing size.
As you came out of the bathroom, you noticed Sunghoon sitting on the couch, almost as if he had been waiting for you, and actually he had been waiting for you. seeing you come out of the bathroom he almost rushed towards you to take you in his arms and quickly leave for the bedroom. and his actions directly made you laugh since Sunghoon usually didn't act like that. he never acted like that actually.
then quickly you were both under the covers, one of his arms slipping around your waist as he made sure you were comfortable and almost every time wondering how you felt when he moved to your side or that he moved his arms around your waist, not wanting to make you uncomfortable.
"good night mi amor.." Sunghoon had whispered in your ear, noticing that you were slowly falling asleep while he placed a kiss on your cheek.
"good night Sunghoon.." you replied as you were already falling asleep in Sunghoon's arms, loving the way he held you in his arms.
and after several minutes, Sunghoon himself had finally fallen asleep too, holding you close to him, while his head rested against your shoulder. and even in sleep you were both adorable.
𓏲 𖧷ˊ SUNOO
Sunno had always been quite clingy as a boyfriend, not that you didn't mind, on the contrary. you loved it when Sunoo spent most of his time wanting to cuddle you, hold your hands in his, or any other way to have physical contact with you. he was really cute.
the problem is that, when you offered to spend the night at his place, you hadn't thought about this detail. since even though during the day sunoo was really adorable with all his actions and the way he wanted to have any physical contact with you, at night it was something else entirely.
as soon as you were seated with him, a series on the television, he almost immediately moved closer to you and came to give you countless kisses on the cheeks or even hugs. something which at first was really adorable, then with the angel face he gave you every time, it was almost impossible to say no to him or refuse his cuddles.
except that the more time passed, the more you felt that sleeping next to him for the first time was going to be complicated if he was this clingy with you. "Sunoo, I really love your hugs but if I want to sleep it's quite complicated given how you hold me against you.. can you hold me a little less tightly please?" you asked him just before seeing him stand up, looking at you quite confused.
"Does that make you uncomfortable? Sorry, that wasn't what I wanted.." he replied, realizing that he had potentially made you uncomfortable with his too many hugs or kisses. . "no..! no not at all Sunoo I love your hugs I told you.. it's just that you hold me too tightly and it's not very comfortable to breathe.. so we can continue cuddling doesn't really bother me, but please hold me a little less hard."
and with your words you took his arms in your hands, loosening his grip around your waist to show him how you wanted him to hold you against him. "like that it’s perfect Sunoo.. you sometimes hold me a little too hard against you so it hurts a little.. but if we both sleep next time don't hold me as hard.."
you ended up turning around, noticing that he was sad to hear you say that, and inevitably you placed a kiss on his lips trying to reassure him. "Hey we can continue to cuddle sunoo.. if I hadn't loved you I would have moved away from you and yet I'm still in your arms okay?"
"okay.. sorry I didn't realize that I could maybe hurt you by holding you against me.. I promise I will be careful from now on but if we sleep together I refuse to let you go to the other end of the bed. I need to have you against me love.." he replied to you as he placed kisses on your cheeks again before finishing with your lips.
"I know that sunoo and it's really adorable.." you replied in turn.
and after twenty minutes of talking you both ended up falling asleep against each other, your head resting against his chest as he held you close. and strangely, even in his sleep he hadn't held you so tightly since you told him of your discomfort.
𓏲 𖧷ˊ JUNGWON
as soon as jungwon had opened the door to his room you felt this knot in your stomach appear while you were more and more stressed at the idea of ​​sleeping next to your boyfriend.
Jungwon had always taken the time to reassure you when he offered to sleep with you, because he knew how nervous you could be no matter the situation when you were both in the same room. Not only are these quite disturbing things happening between you, quite the contrary! but because you had reactions due to your former relationship.
so obviously, as soon as you had settled into bed he placed himself directly beside you, his arm placed around your waist and placed a kiss on your cheek before noticing that, despite your comfort, you still had doubts about what could happen.
"eh.. sweetheart I'm not doing anything serious you know that I've explained it to you at least five times today.." he whispered next to your ears trying to reassure you. "do you want us to watch a movie? a series? read a little book to reassure yourself and calm down before we sleep? are you comfortable enough in my bed?"
"Jungwonie.. I'm fine I promise.." you replied almost immediately, a smile gently appearing on your lips as you raised your head to look at him. "a movie can be perfect and yes I'm comfortable Jungwon don't worry.. I'll eventually get comfortable as it goes along it's just strange sleeping with you for the first time.."
"kitten.. I'm going to tell you how many times that you're here just to reassure you and make sure that you're okay during the night so you have no problem, and if things don't go well during the night you just need to wake me up and I'll be here for you okay?"
noticing that you weren't responding, jungwon quickly took the remote and turned on the tv then left the remote for you to choose a movie for you to watch.
you quickly took the remote and after ten minutes of trying to find a movie, you ended up finding a movie that you loved so obviously you started it directly, hoping that Jungwon wasn't going to say anything against it, but he remained silent and placed a kiss on your cheek to reassure you.
then, as time passed and the more you were in the film, you were more and more comfortable with the idea of ​​sleeping with your boyfriend that night and your head ended up resting against his shoulder and his hand came to play with your hair. "you're adorable sweetheart.." he whispered, smiling.
but you didn't necessarily react since you started to fall asleep against him, and noticing your state he let you fall asleep tenderly, loving to see you finally being at ease with him and, he continued to play with your hair until he fell asleep himself, holding you close to him.
𓏲 𖧷ˊ NIKI
when you told Niki that you wanted to sleep with him, he didn't know what to answer while he was trying to find out if you were serious or not. with you Niki could go through all the emotions so obviously, at first he just thought it was just one of your jokes.
"no Niki I'm really serious this time! I really want us to sleep together for just one night please!" you begged as you took his hands in yours and looked at him with the most adorable gaze.
"so it's really not a joke you're playing on me? you really want to sleep with me?" he asked you, almost forgetting that he was your boyfriend.
"but yes!! go this evening, please! plus you're already home, and my mother would be so happy to see you stay!" you used as an argument, hoping he would take you seriously.
and that's how you ended up in your room, the two of you while the television was on but you weren't really watching.
It had been four hours since you discussed this, and Niki still couldn't understand how serious you were about this. he was still lost in thought wondering why.
then quickly the blow of a pillow hitting his face brought him out of his thoughts. How could he not have thought of that? a laugh left his lips when he saw you gripping your pillow while looking at him with a smile, and he quickly understood that you were challenging him.
so quickly he grabbed one of the pillows in turn, and quickly the calm of the room had disappeared while you were both having a pillow fight and giggling like children. after all, acting like children was the best thing you two knew how to do when you were together, so these kinds of activities weren't surprising between the two of you.
It must have lasted too long, or it was simply because you were making too much noise, laughing and screaming like children, but your mother ended up appearing in your room, seeing you both armed with your cousins. standing on your bed. and when you noticed it you quickly froze, hoping she wasn't upset.
and she wasn't. Your mother had simply said that it was late and that you had better go to sleep. to which you answered yes, and while she was still looking at you you finally calmed down and hid under the covers. then she ended up going back to her room.
"I was the one who won anyway.." Niki ended up whispering about the pillow fight you had just come to do. "No, it's me who won.." you replied, whispering too.
except that, being two children, you and Niki had almost started hitting each other with your pillows again, but noticing your movement, Niki had stopped you, taking your hands in hers and quickly her lips were against yours.
"I don't think we can really start again so we'll stop there pretty girl.." he whispered against your lips, and strangely his kiss calmed you down. you ended up kissing him too.
then, after little kisses you ended up falling asleep in each other's arms. Forget your actions as children, even if the next day everything was going to start again for the whole day..
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thanks you for reading all of this it’s really sweet ! hope that you liked each of the members scenarios and that you enjoyed reading !
comment to be added to my permanent taglist (for all my post except the series !)
anyways loves you, see you soon !! 💗
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freakassfemme · 18 hours
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hey snookums miss your writing so freaking bad :( sharing my thoughts on being abby's favorite hookup so she drops some breeding kink talk and then doubles down on it when u confront her after because she's flustered and shy about it 🥺
ohhhh you mean abby dropping plans with another girl the moment you text her?
you mean abby showing up with a special strap that she only keeps for you, and she’s practically buzzing with excitement on your doorstep, laughing nervously when you open the door in hardly anything, maybe a pretty set of lingerie or one of her tee shirts?
you mean abby whose face goes red when you lean against the door, playing coy and running a hand up your front, pushing the shirt up until she can see there’s nothing underneath, and she shoves you inside?
or do you mean abby whose got her strap buried inside of you, groaning so loudly into your neck that it’s making your head swirl?
abby whose thighs are sticky from your cunt, and she’s got your legs hoisted over her shoulders, her hips stuttering as your pretty moans spur her on, dragging her dangerously close to cumming untouched as she slams into you over and over and over again until she thinks she might have fucked up the drywall in your room with how hard the headboard is slamming into it. abby who is babbling like an idiot, too lost it in to let you get more than a few words out.
“jesus, fuck abby, oh my god —“
“shit, i know baby, i know. you want more? you want it harder baby?”
“fuck, yes, yes, please—“
“god you’re perfect, fucking perfect, ‘m gonna give you more baby, don’t worry sweetheart, ‘m gonna give it to you”
“please please please i want it, please —“
her moaning loudly, biting down at the space where your shoulder meets your neck as she sits up some, pushing your legs down until your knees are nearly pressed by your head, and god it’s so easy for her to shove you around like you weighed nothing.
“god, fuck!” she’s groaning, slamming a hand down on the mattress just to let out some of her pent up arousal as she tries to remind herself you are a person, you are breakable.
“‘m gonna give it to you baby, don’t worry,” she murmurs, grabbing your cheeks between her hand and making you look at her. “gonna make you mine, fill you up just like you deserve pretty girl”
it’s nothing crazy, just the tip of the iceberg in the ways she wants you and the ways she wants to possess you, but you bury your head into her chest, nails digging into her back as a whine tears itself from your throat, cracking the exterior of her perfect little minx with nothing more than a few words, and it riled her the fuck up.
she grabs you by the throat, pinning you down against the mattress again. she wants to see you again, needs to see you again and the way you react to her, she needs to say worse, needs to pour every confession from the tip of her dick to the bottom of her heart into your mouth right now.
“yeah baby?” she asks, eyebrows raised. you say nothing, just whining in embarrassment until she gives you a light slap to your cheek and asks you again. “you like that? want me to stuff you full, princess? fuck you til you can’t think? til you’re a brain dead little thing for me?”
you can’t help but give in this time, nodding with red cheeks and water pooling in your eyes as she takes your gentle response to heart, and she makes good on her promise.
you don’t stay shy though, and later in the night, when Abby’s done cleaning you up with her mouth and you’re curled up on your couch with her lying on her back between your legs. your fingers card through her hair, gentle undoing the knots your desperate arousal had woven into the golden locks earlier.
“so,” you start, pursing your lips to hide a smile as she looks up at you, ever attentive to your voice.
“fucking me til i’m brain dead, huh?” you ask, and instantly, her face turns bright red. she’s flipping herself over before you can do anything about it, burying her face into your stomach to hide her embarrassment.
“c’monnnnn, abs,” you say, giggling and poking at her side with your ankle. “it was kind of cute. i liked it. didn’t know you wanted to knock me up that bad.”
she groans into your stomach, tickling the soft skin until you’re wriggling underneath her, shoving her off of you. her confidence gathers itself quickly, and soon she’s giggling back as she wrestles against you, easily shoving you back into the plush fabric of the couch.
she can’t say it to your face, too shy, but when your legs wrap around her waist and her face is pulled next to yours, she whispers, “you haven’t even seen how bad it is yet.”
is that the abby you mean?
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buddie911abc · 2 days
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Here I go again.
Buck asks Eddie if his son is the real reason he doesn't date. Eddie responds with, "That and, they weren't my type."
This has been a flag for everyone who reads the subtext, but let's take a moment to look at the last GIF.
Eddie says they weren't his type. Buck turns around to look at them and probably assesses what makes them, 'not' Eddie's type because the girls were all subjectively pretty. There were also a variety of types of women there.
But look closely at the GIF. Eddie said they weren't his type. While Buck is glancing back, Eddie gives Buck a quick look that really screams, "You are it. You are the type." When I noticed this from the GIF edit, I thought it might be the creator slowing it down, but nope. If I look at the episode, it is the same or nearly the same. This is early season two, and I have always thought, in the early episodes, there was no intent to pair Eddie with Buck as anything but a friend. However, this scene makes me wonder at what point Tim M or whoever was writing changed their minds about adding in a subtextual narrative.
I find it very difficult to see this scene as a heteronormative exchange. In fact, it even feels like Eddie is pushing back a little to test where Buck stands. Buck as a character who lacks self-awareness gives a mixed signal answer. (which tracks with his character at this point and matches his coming-out arc.) **edited to clarify** Buck's mixed signal response to Eddie saying they aren't my type is, "Not mine either, at least not anymore."**
A few seconds later, Buck says Eddie has a weak excuse. My lovely and wonderfully sassy Eddie says, "You live in your invisible girlfriend's house, and you're telling me about weak excuses." He essentially points at Buck's closet door, but of course, this is something that Buck couldn't see or pick up on at the time. These moments are small in the grand scheme of the show as a whole so I'm afraid it will be forgotten. It would be nice to have some sort of throwback acknowledgment that this scene hasn't been retconned.
To backtrack a little bit here, I would also like to point out something else about the early timing or the writing of these characters as potentially queer. They are outside. (True I don't understand the ins and outs of filmmaking so there may very well be a reason for this.) But the shot itself is making them walk close together. Not just close, their shoulders are literally bumping against each other, hitting and knocking at each other in a way that might appear "unintentionally" intimate--until you remember they are outside. It seems to me like there are dozens of ways to shoot this thing that don't require them to be so casually physical with each other. For the scene to be shot like this and then consider the canon conversation that took place, it feels quite intentional that the writers wanted viewers to look closely for something else.
Whenever certain people call Buddie shippers delusional, I think about this. Subtextual language aside, the scenes are shot in such a way as to plant the idea of "More." There is attraction here. There is flirting.
Someone, somewhere wanted to tell this story from the start; and I'm not mad about it. I'm 100% here for it, and I'm ready for it to go down as the most epic love story I've ever watched or read about, but I also admit that I want it to be canon, not so I can throw it in anyone's face that their ship is wrong, but so I can prove I'm not some weirdo putting two hot guys together. I'm seeing a real romance being built. I want that validation as much as I want everyone under the LGBTQ umbrella to see representation for themselves on screen.
If you want to see the scene, go to about 3:05.
youtube
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scribere-flores · 16 hours
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Sabo x Reader
~Just as a hypothetical question~
Part 5. Other Parts Word count: 3,8k words Short summary: Reader is preparing her escape, slowly losing it over her confusing feelings. Sabo is in his stalker era. AN: Dear God, I don't know what took over me when writing this. Let me begin with saying I don't condone stalking irl, this is just a silly self-indulgent fic. There is also mentions of a knife at one point, more as a joke, but it's there. Still nothing graphic. Smut will come in the next one, which will also be the last part. Thank you for reading!💕
MDNI 18+
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(This man is way too pretty for his own good)
___
Almost three days had passed since Y/N became aware of Sabo’s true identity. And of the real threat he posed to her. He was dangerous, not just because he probably could crush her windpipe with little to no effort.
No, the real reason Sabo was so dangerous was because of his goddamn charm. Always helpful, always making her flustered. Always making her laugh against her will. It was still impossible for her to keep it together when she was near him.
He was playing a sick, sadistic game with her feelings. He wanted to kill her for god sake! And, even though those horrid facts were clear to her, Y/N’s heart still wanted to jump out of her chest every time she saw him.
And that was probably saying more about how messed up she was. Desperately clinging to the first person that ever showed her concern, even though she knew it was fake. Pathetic.
She kept having this one recurring dream. Being alone in a dark room, until the door suddenly opens, and Sabo walks with a smug grin on his face.
He stands behind her, places her wrists behind her back, and then proceeds to let his hands travel all over her body. Cold leather from his gloves caressing her skin as he presses soft kisses down her neck and back.
His movements growing more impatient as he takes a strong grip around her hair, pulling her against him. Then, just before the dream ends, his other hand snakes around her neck, cutting the air from entering her lungs.
And it excites her! Y/N always wakes up feeling hot and tingly after that dream, which means that something must be seriously wrong with her.
The man wants to kill her and she gets excited by the thought of him choking her?! That can’t be normal, it just can’t.
Besides her internal crises that she still had the hots for her future potential murderer, everything else was going as planned. 
After spending a half-day crying over the fact that the handsome, cruel man had tricked her just for his own pleasure, Y/N finally pulled herself together and started planning her escape. She was not willingly staying in this cursed base just to later be dragged to the execution stand.
So she had made a list, things she needed to secure her safety once she left. All the things she had spent the last few days gathering. Things that now were securely kept in a bag in her closet. 
She had also visited the small library more than once, reading every book on wilderness survival she could find. Memorizing pictures of what plants were safe to eat and which ones she should avoid. It wouldn’t exactly be ideal if she ran away from torture and her own murder, just to then die of food poisoning.
Y/N had done all these things, and she was painfully aware of the fact that she had been watched. 
Sabo was always near, following her like some curious cat, trying to figure out what the mouse he was hunting was doing. She was the mouse in this scenario, and it was starting to get on her last nerve. 
He looked amused the entire time too, huge grin on his face, probably getting some twisted sense of pleasure from watching her from afar. It was annoying, and Y/N was pretty sure stalking counted as a crime. But so was trying to overthrow the World Government, so Sabo might just not care that he was breaking the law.
It didn’t matter anyways, she had already gathered everything she needed and her planned escape was happening tomorrow.
She was currently pacing back and forth in her room, trying to figure out if she had forgotten about something. 
Who was she kidding, she most definitely had.
She hadn’t stepped foot outside the castle gates her entire life before two weeks ago, and now she was planning to survive out in the wilderness all by herself. It was a recipe for disaster.
But if the choice was between dying of hypothermia in freedom, or in the hands of the Revolutionary Army and her handsome tormentor, Y/N would choose freezing cold freedom everyday of the week.
Suddenly, her dark thoughts were interrupted by a knock on her door.
“Jane Doe, you in there?” An obnoxious, honey-sweet voice could be heard on the other side.
Hate that stupid nickname.
He seriously needed to stop doing this. For the last couple of mornings, at the same time everyday, Sabo had knocked on her door, asking if she was there.
And Y/N never answered, pretending that she wasn’t in the room. He usually stayed outside for a few minutes before he left, which was probably going to be the case today too.
She heard Sabo let out a deep sigh.
“I don’t know if you’re there, but I’m coming in.” He stated, like he wasn’t about to invade the last personal space she had at this godforsaken base.
Goddamnit… She had locked the door, right?  
No, this wasn’t the time to take any chances, she needed to hide. Who knew what god awful thing he would do to her if he found her.
Y/N quickly scanned the room for a hiding spot. Under the bed was too obvious, even she knew that. As her eyes landed on the small built-in closet, she heard the doorknob starting to turn. She didn’t have the time to be picky, she needed to hide, now!
Just as she had slid the closet shut, the bedroom door flew open. The small wooden planks of the closet door barely gave her any vision of the room, but the gap was wide enough to see Sabo mindlessly walk in. Not a care in the world, like he belonged in there.
‘He wishes.’ Y/N thought as she rolled her eyes.
Then she noticed that he was looking at the closet, straight at her, with a serious look that spelled nothing but trouble. She could swear that her heart was trying to crack her ribcage open by how hard it was beating.
She put her hands over her mouth, careful to not make a sound, as Sabo’s eyes lingered on her hiding spot for a few more seconds. Then an amused grin spread over his face, before he turned around and started to look around her room.
Dear God, that had been a close call.
“Are you hiding from me, Angel?” Sabo chuckled, bending down to look under the bed.
Since his blatant fake confession he had called her that from time to time. Some new way to play tricks on her mind for sure. And Y/N always berated herself when she heard it, because it made her stupid heart flutter every time.
Seriously, what was wrong with her?
Besides studying up on how to survive on her own, she had read a few books on psychology during her visits to the library. In those she had learned about this thing called *Stockholm Syndrome*, basically when a captive believes they are in love with their capturer. 
And Y/N had let out a sigh of relief when she read that. It explained every warm feeling she had for the man that she was 95% sure wanted to chop her head off in front of a crowd. The other 5%, well… that was the dumb sliver of hope that still lingered in the back of her mind. 
A sliver of hope that she consciously ignored. She wasn’t in her right mind, she had been manipulated by that handsome devil, and the strange thoughts she had about him couldn’t be trusted.
She had to stick to what she knew, and that was that Revolutionaries hated Nobles with a burning passion. At least, that had to be the case when the revolutionary in question was their Second in Command.
The closet walls were starting to feel cramped as she continued to watch Sabo mindlessly prance around her bedroom. He picked up her pillow, brought it to his face and let out a low groan as he took a deep inhale through his nose, making Y/N really question the man’s sanity. Was he trying to memorize her scent in case he had to hunt her down? 
What was he? A goddamn bloodhound or something?
She let out a quiet scoff when he put the pillow back, seeing a satisfied look on his face. She shouldn't have done that.
His eyes zeroed in on her again, a wicked smile spreading over his lips, making Y/N forget how to breathe. 
A shiver went down her spine as she watched Sabo move closer, stopping right outside the closet. He was so close she could feel him towering over her through the door. 
“Are you in here, Angel? Please answer if you are.” 
Dear God, please don’t open it.
Someone was apparently listening to her prayer, since he abruptly turned around, when Y/N was just seconds from passing out due to the lack of air in her lungs.
“Bummer, guess she’s not here then.” Sabo said in a monotone voice, putting his hand to his cheek in a dramatic manner.
He started to walk towards the door. She couldn’t believe it, she was actually going to get through this without being found.
Then, Sabo stopped in the middle of his step, right as he walked by her dresser. He carefully opened the top draw, which wasn’t good. That wasn’t good at all.
“Hmm… I might as well since I’m already here.” He snickered as he took something out and stuffed it in his pocket, quickly leaving the room right after.
As soon as the bedroom door closed, Y/N fell out of the closet and landed on the floor. Too shocked from what she just had witnessed.
“Did- did he just steal my underwear?” She whispered to herself, as she felt a warm flush spread over her face.
Was Sabo a pervert?
Because that would explain sooo much. She laid on the floor, pondering on her theory for a few moments, before she rolled over on her back and let out a weird, nervous laugh.
“Yes, definitely a pervert… Just gonna add that to the list of reasons why he needs to be avoided at all cost.” Y/N concluded, questioning how she had gotten herself in this situation to begin with.
___
So fucking angelic.
There was no other way of describing her. Even though she had actively been avoiding him for the past few days and making him watch her from afar. 
But Sabo could forgive that. She was obviously planning something, and the most optimistic part of himself had convinced him that it was going to be a surprise.
He didn’t know what kind of surprise yet, but he looked forward to it. A little too much in fact.
He had watched his Angel gather all sorts of things, swiping snacks from the pantry when she thought no one was looking. Snatching blankets and other fabrics from the laundry, candles and matches from the storage. 
All things that were needed for a romantic date. 
Sabo still wasn’t sure why she needed all the tools she stole from the supply closet, nor did he understand what she was going to use a tarp for.
But he almost lost his shit yesterday when he saw her sneak a rope into her bag. If his, quite frankly, dirty mind was right and she wanted him to tie her up with it, he might have to marry her on the spot. 
The knife however, that was still a bit concerning… But hey, he was willing to try out whatever she had in mind at least once.
No matter what she was doing, these past few days had convinced him.
She had continued to play their little game, even though the rules had changed a bit. AND, she was planning a romantic surprise for him. That girl understood him so well.
She liked him, maybe just as much as he liked her, if that even was possible.
Sabo knew his obsession was starting to get a little out of hand. Or in all honesty, “a little” would be an understatement. 
He knew that what he was doing wasn’t exactly normal. Watching her go about her day, keeping tabs on where she was, at what time in the morning she was leaving her bedroom and when she usually returned. Putting it in a more brutal way, he was stalking her.
God- that girl brought out dark things in him he wasn’t even aware were there before. Last night he spent at least two hours convincing himself that, sneaking into her room through her window while she was sleeping, wasn’t a good idea. 
It wasn’t, he knew that. No matter how much that girl had messed with his moral compass, he knew that it would be crossing a line.
But he just wanted to hear the sweet voice he had been deprived of hearing for the last few days, even if it was her yelling at him to get out.
That’s why he went to see her this morning, to talk to her. Not about anything special, he just wanted to see her pretty mouth move, until his mind was filled with nothing but the sweet sound of her voice.
Sabo knew she had been in there, observation haki really becoming handy in these kinds of situations. But she hid in her closet when he stepped into her room.
And if she wanted to play Hide and Seek, who was he to deprive her of that fun? 
Plus, he had gotten a little prize for playing along.
Still, things had started to become a little boring for him.
At first, it had been exciting seeing her turn a corner every time he was near. Watching her look over her shoulder to see if he was there. It was twisted- but fuck- just knowing she was constantly thinking about him brought him so much joy.
Even if she was doing it in an attempt to avoid him, Sabo couldn’t be mad about it. She was obviously still trying to muster up the courage to face him after his blatant confession.
It was cute.
He had imagined her confessing her feelings for him so many times at this point. Nervous stutters leaving her mouth, a flustered blush spreading over her face.
God- Just the thought made him want to do unspeakable things to that poor girl. 
And in any normal case, Sabo was nothing but patient. With her however, not so much. 
Like previously stated, watching her had been fun for a while. But he was done with just watching now, he wanted to be with her. Being close to her, talking to her, teasing her. Seeing her smile, laugh or just resting peacefully on his chest.
So, at this moment he was in the library, hiding behind a bookshelf and going over his options on how to best approach her.
Jane Doe was sitting at a table a bit further away, reading a book in peace. Looking absolutely angelic.
Besides the two of them, the rest of the room was empty. And dammit, if there hadn’t been so many unresolved issues that needed to be sorted out first, he would probably pin her to that table right this moment.
Hitching that cute, little skirt up over her hips as he left kisses up and down her gorgeous legs. Teasing her to the brink of insanity until she begged him to touch her. Eating her out like a man starved for food-
Yeah, that was definitely not happening yet.
The second best option was to go over there, trying to make her flustered enough to at least blush. Which shouldn’t be too hard to achieve.
So Sabo did just that, walking over with a statement that was suggestive enough in mind. He stopped right behind her chair, bending down close to her ear, feeling a bit amused when he saw her flinch.
“You know, I had this dream last night- and fuck- your hands felt so soft against my skin. Like an Angel touching my very soul.” He said in a low voice, blowing a puff of hot air against her neck.
It was true, he really dreamt that last night. He had been kinda pissed off when he woke, not wanting the wonderful dream to end.
And he knew how much his little nickname affected her, she was so bad at hiding her true feelings.
“Dear God, why?” The girl asked under her breath, making Sabo chuckle as he walked over to the other side of the table, sitting down across from her.
“Why? Cause you’re cute, and funny, and ignoring me. So you’re obviously my type.” He stated, watching her mindlessly turn to the next page in her book.
“I’m sorry, what were you saying?” She answered, looking up at him for the first time.
“Perfect.” Sabo sighed, getting completely lost in her eyes.
He barely had the chance to catch the pretty blush that spread over her face, before she turned her head down.
But it was there, he saw it, and it made his chest fill with pride. No matter how hard she tried to ignore him, he could still make her flustered anytime he wanted to.
“Are you bothered by me being here?” He asked, giving her a teasing smile.
“Yes. I want to be alone.” She said curtly in response, not paying him more attention than necessary.
It was selfish, and probably a bit dumb. But Sabo wanted her attention to be on him, and not on some stupid book. What was so interesting about it anyways, for her to not look at him? He was way more interesting-
God, he really needed to seek professional help, didn't he? He was jealous over a fucking book.
“What are you reading anyway?” He scoffed, failing to keep his displeasure in.
“None of your business.” She snapped back, voice deprived of any warmth.
Shit, was she annoyed? That couldn’t be good…
“Why are you so snappy today?” Sabo asked, needing to know if all of it was just in his head.
“I’m not.” She bit out, jaw visibly clenching. 
If it was one thing Sabo took pride in, it was that he was good at reading people. But not this girl apparently, making her an exception in yet another way. 
He must have fucked up big during the last couple of days for her to be this mad with him. Was it the stalking? Had he taken it too far? 
“Yes you are. Did I do something to make you upset? I’ll try to fix it if you tell me.” He said, trying to reach for her hand, but she quickly moved it away.
“I said I’m not. Just drop it.” 
Was this their first fight? 
Sabo might not have been in any real long term relationship before, but he wanted this to work. He needed this to work, because he wasn’t sure if he could recover from being rejected by her. 
He knew that communication was important in any healthy relationship, so her avoiding the topic wasn’t going to cut it.
“I will drop it, if you tell me what’s wrong. I don’t want you to be angry at me and-”
“Can you just back the fuck off and leave me alone?” She said with an irritated tone, looking up at him with fire in her eyes.
Oh fuck, she’s mad mad.
She swore… she actually swore. That was a word Sabo thought he never would hear leave his Angel's beautiful mouth.
Was this about the underwear? He knew she had been hiding in the closet when he “borrowed” them, but he didn’t think she would be this angry about it.
“Is this about what I took from your room? Because I was going to give-”
“IT’S NOT ABOUT THE FUCKING UNDERWEAR!”
“Okay, so I must have done something else then… I'm sorry?” He said, feeling his heart sink to his stomach.
She didn’t say anything more. She just let out a frustrated groan as she slammed the book shut, leaving it on the table and walked away. Leaving him alone with nothing but his own thoughts.
Goddamnit!
He messed up, this was not how he wanted things to go. Had he been wrong the entire time? Had she actually been mad at him, and was that the reason she avoided him to begin with? Had they not just been playing their usual silly game?
Fuck, maybe had he come on too strong three days ago. He did choke her, so it wouldn’t be surprising if that was the reason. But she said she liked it, right?
Sabo was about to go crazy, trying to figure out what he did wrong, when his eyes landed on the green cover of the book she had been reading.
He picked it up, curiosity getting the better of him.
“ *Outdoor Survival for Beginners*- what the actual?” He flipped through the pages, as something clicked in his brain. “Shit-”
Jane Doe was planning on running away…
It all made sense now. Why she avoided him, why she had gathered all those different things. Why she had been so defensive just moments ago.
(Why she hadn’t told him she liked him too.)
She was leaving, and she didn’t want anything left behind. It made sense, he would do the same thing if he knew he was leaving. It was plain cruel to confess your feelings to someone, just to be gone a few days later.
That’s why he had confessed to her. He wasn’t exactly planning on leaving her anytime soon, and he wanted her to know that.
Still, the only thing that didn’t make sense was her reason. Why would she want to run away?
She liked it here, Sabo saw how happy she looked whenever she helped around the base. How well she got along with Koala. How peaceful she had looked that morning when she slept on his chest.
In fact, why was she even hiding her identity to begin with? He hadn’t thought about it more than in passing, his mind usually being too preoccupied with holding his urges back around her.
Something wasn’t right…
“I might have to speed some things up.” Determination took over him.
Her plan was batshit crazy to begin with. She couldn’t even cook, how the fuck was she going to survive alone in the woods? She would die, hungry, freezing and alone, within a couple of days.
Sabo couldn’t stand the thought of losing someone he cared for again. Not after Ace-
No. This wasn’t the time to dwell on that. 
He had a few very urgent house calls to make.
___
Tag list: @nymeriiiia
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emeryhiro · 3 days
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Who do you think will likely make the first move if/when Daryl and Carol get together? Is there a fantasy scenario in your head for the big confession scene?
I would be so psyched if AMC and TWD actually goes there.
Hi Anon,
Good question!! I've actually changed my mind so many times about how I think it would happen, even while writing this response. But there are a few details that I've stuck by.
I think Daryl would be the one to initiate a moment like that. And what I mean by a moment is a conversation where everything is finally put out into the open (more on this later). I also know that it would be full of hesitation and fear because, as Norman has said many times before, Daryl is inexperienced and insecure in that area. He doesn't have any "game" and isn't the type to confidently approach something like that.
However, the situations he has faced in France have put him in a position where he starts to feel that he has to initiate something like that, which he may never have been able to do on the main show. I also think that even though Daryl may initiate it, Carol would pick up on his hesitation and intentions, meet him halfway, and probably even take the lead from there.
In my mind, the moment would be full of reassurance and tenderness (both in words and actions) because they would both be overcoming so many insecurities, experiencing a moment they'd been dreaming about for over a decade, and might even be struggling to believe that they're actually in the moment and that it's actually real.
If I had to give you a visual of how I imagine the tone of the moment would play out, I'd say something along the lines of Daemon and Raeynera's confession on the beach in S1EP07 of House of the Dragon (Timestamp 19:47). Here's a part of that scene in case you can't access it through a streaming service.
This scene is full of built-up frustration, hesitation, and tenderness, which is precisely the tone that I imagine for Caryl. Some of the dialogue fits Caryl's circumstances really well as well, with perhaps the roles reversing at certain points (you just gotta ignore the parts about being a child 😅).
In order to explain what I mean a little better, I played around with some of the dialogue (below) from that scene so that it fit Carol and Daryl, and expanded on it a little bit because I think it's vital and necessary for Carol and Daryl to have a conversation like this where they're finally forced to be honest with themselves and each other before anything else can happen between them:
Carol: "I've been alone. You abandoned me."
I imagine this would be Carol confronting Daryl for leaving her behind in the commonwealth and putting his life (and ultimately her life) at risk, and possibly risking never being able to see each other again. This could also be built-up frustration from Daryl's seven years in the woods and how Carol kept asking him to return.
Daryl: "I spared you."
I think this would be Daryl starting to show Carol how he'd always felt that he wasn't good enough for her or that he could ever make her happy, so in his mind he spared her by staying away from her.
Carol: "And look at what my life became without you... Droll tragedy." Daryl: "Oh, and I wonder what you think of mine by comparison?"
This would be the moment they both finally understood that they were wrong to think the other person was better off without them and that, in the end, they'd both been living only half a life without the other.
Carol: "I know little of it..." Daryl: "Did you love him?" Carol: "We were happy enough." Daryl: "Well, that in itself is a great achievement... I am sorry."
These lines could really work for either of them. They're now finally sharing the things that were holding them back, like miscommunication and both thinking that the other was in love and happy with someone else (Carol with Ezekiel, and Daryl with Leah or even Isabelle).
~~~~
Thanks again for your question 🩵 and thank you to everyone who's been taking the time to read all my recent responses and posts. I really hope I've explained myself well here because I get so overwhelmed and excited every time I think about the possibility of Carol and Daryl finally being allowed to be together.
This has been the thing that I've wanted the most for them for over half my life, and to think that it may finally happen is a lot for me to process, so it has been really nice to be able to put some of my thoughts into words in this way.
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gamerbearmira · 1 day
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Making up a song about Mirabel and Camilo
⚠️⚠️‼️‼️ K so slight gore on the third drawing ?? Or maybe it’s more of a blood tw. Anyway uhhh I finally did the other members!
Other Agustín is pretty similar to normal Agustín, if not more doting. He also refrains from mentioning gifts entirely. He’s not really allowed to, and sometimes they catch him glancing around. Julieta is a bit more jumpy; but that’s because she knows more than the other “other” family members. She’s also the one who pulls Camilo and Mirabel from the mirror prison. They’re obviously most doting on Mirabel. Julieta is kinda hesitant to give Mirabel the food she makes there, but she has to; the other Alma insists.
Pepa is constantly happy, never frowning, never crying. No clouds, only rainbows. Camilo and Mirabel may or may not have noticed small stitches at the corners of her mouth. Anyway, the two really like it, but then they sort of start to miss Pepa’s rain. But when they ask Other Pepa to make some rain, she can’t. She kinda just stares, and looks around with a really questionable smile. As if she’s trying to frown but can’t. Felíx is pretty similar to an npc, always next to and supported Camilo. Like a yes man, he never says no.
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Obviously Isabela is made to be quiet. Strangely so. She doesn’t say anything, and can’t say anything. Layer on she can only warm them with looks and her hands. She’s also pushed towards the background and Alma barely acknowledges her unless she needs to.
Dolores is a lot more talkative. But she can only say certain things. It’s like she can say tons of stuff, but there’s something of a filter. This becomes a problem later on when Camilo and Mirabel are trying to get help from her and she’s basically speaking in riddle.
I think I wanna change it to where Antonio is there (Camilo and Mirabel are still 10), but Antonio is only a few years old. Luisa has Antonio, so Oepa can focus on Camilo (and Mirabel). This is because, despite his belief, Camilo thinks normal Pepa is ignoring him and favoring Antonio. She’s not, but he’s 10, and his parents are all of the sudden focused on the new baby. But the Other Pepa has time for him. Luisa is sorta like Felíx, a yes man or an npc mostly, she’s mostly there to fill in with Antonio, so Camilo and Mirabel don’t get suspicious.
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Blood warning!!! Again!!! ⚠️‼️‼️
Bruno has to get his button ripped out. Literally. He’s trying to get through the door, but can only go part of the way of the tunnel. The part leading to the real world has an invisible barrier that keeps him from leaving. He knows it’s the button but can’t figure out how to get it out.
Well this is during the Other Alma chase and they don’t have time to dwell, so Camilo’s like “Just rip it out!”. Bruno tries to protest but Camilo’s already prying at the button,and Bruno kind just pulls away, half to stop him, and half to help him pull it away. After a forceful tug from both Camilo and Mirabel, it comes out. They leave it in the tunnel and finally leave.
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As for the actual family, and where they’re trapped, I think it’s in the family photo. The game they play, I’m not sure. Maybe a treasure hunt like Coraline, but it’s the family photo and Bruno’s single eye (because yes it still exists, but lost). I’m not sure if he’ll still be able to use it, but even with one eye, he can use his Gift still.
More later. Might write for this during October.
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melverie · 5 months
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Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh today I've been constantly experiencing the urge to un-private today-in-the-devildom & start writing for it again
#i'm gonna ramble in the tags but#i've been talking with starr (if you're reading this--hi starr!! <3) about the blog today and sharing some of the entries#and it just made me miss it so much#+ the conversation actually made me realize some other reasons why i didn't enjoy the blog in general anymore#like i genuinely love the blog and i genuinely loved writing for it & that conversation reminded me of that#but also there were so many reasons that ultimately pushed me to more or less abandon the blog & then later private it too#so i'm kind of at a loss here#tbh i think i'm mostly just scared to pick the blog up again only for it to end exactly like last time i picked it back up#i've actually always wanted for the blog to be a source of inspiration y'know?#like the things mentioned in the entries are kinda just small ideas right#i was hoping that people would read these & feel inspired to write or draw something of their own based on my entries#that was actually what made me start the blog in the first place. the hope that i could inspire others that way#aaahhhhhh.... maybe it's on me since i could have more openly communicated that idea......#i did get to meet one wonderful person who wrote a few fics based on my entries tho!! (hi ali <3)#but yeah..there's that#also the way engagement just dropped significantly after a while#like i know i was gone for a good while & that a lot of people left the fandom and all that#but still getting maybe one reblog if i'm lucky really feels like a punch to the gut#ESPECIALLY considering that i was close to 900 followers on there#do you guys know that feeling when you proudly show someone you care about something you did only to get a disinterested answer?#yeah...#that's essentially how it feels like to me#and well as you might know the feeling of “why should i keep writing if apparently no one cares” eventually won... haha.....#but aaaahhhhh i'm still clinging onto the hope & what ifs here#that conversation with starr really just made me forget about everything that frustrated me about the blog & left me with this#longing feeling to start again lol#hey if you've made it this far into the tags let me just ask--would you care if i picked the blog back up?#would you also *show* that you care?#i'm actually quite curious (you could almost call me george lol)#anyway maybe we'll see each other on today-in-the-devildom again in the future.. who knows
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magentagalaxies · 4 months
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going to a comedy open mic tomorrow mostly to watch my friends (it's at a cool venue that my improv troupe performs at once a month and a few improv troupe friends are doing standup there) but when these friends were asking if i'd be interested in coming they were like "btw there's usually a ton of open spots on show days if YOU want to do something... and they're not strict about it only being standup either, people have done character pieces and sketches etc like they embrace the weirdness... and they're not strict about time limits you could probably do anything between three and eight minutes... sometimes if there's not enough people signed up they'll even let you go twice..." and i'm like god damn it i thought i was gonna take a break from aubrey but this setup is like tailor made for an aubrey appearance lmao
#still on the fence about it bc the burnout i experienced at the beginning of may extended to aubrey#especially bc so much of my aubrey stuff is comedy about gender and my brain was more in ''set everything on fire'' mode#and i think i've gotten to a good place with that burnout but i still haven't worked on any aubrey stuff since i got home from college#but even still even tho my mental health is better than it was a few weeks ago#recently i have had this horrible insomnia where i haven't been able to fall asleep at night in over a week#(i've made up for it with naps but still i am not mentally 100% rn. i've tried so many things and nothing has worked.)#so that's my justification for *not* doing aubrey tomorrow. however.#i reeeally need to get more performance experience bc there's only so much you can develop a sketch character without performing them#and this venue is so good. it's an art gallery like an hour away that's designed to be part gallery and part performance venue#especially for comedy. like the venue owner is this veteran comedian who used to work with bobcat goldthwait and a lot of other big names#and it's a low-pressure environment bc everyone there has seen me do comedy before with my improv troupe#but they still haven't seen me do aubrey at all so it's bringing a new side of my comedy to some of my main collaborators#like this is so much better than my previous aubrey performances bc they were all either#1. shows in CLASSROOMS with a bunch of my classmates who generally don't get my comedy (very clique-ish)#or 2. a guest spot on a show at a coffee shop where everyone knew each other except me#plus the biggest thing for me is the lack of a strict time limit. like as much as having a good 3-minute monologue can be#i think aubrey is a character you need to get to know a bit longer than 3 minutes. and a lot of my stuff is long while also being very tigh#like not every monologue is like this but my best aubrey monologues are almost like aubrey is telling you a sitcom storyline#and removing too many lines makes the whole narrative jenga tower fall over#and as much as i want to figure out how to make every monologue a good starting point#having the chance to perform multiple monologues if i get to go twice so that they can build off each other would be perfect#idk i'm not sure how often the open mics are there. at least monthly tho i might be missing next month's depending on when i'm in toronto#so like this wouldn't really be my only chance. but yeah i'm on the fence about whether to bring aubrey back for a performance tomorrow#i probably wouldn't do new material. i'd do the 5 minute version of my uncle reg monologue bc it's the one that's worked best so far#and if i get to do multiple. maybe i'd do the ''nom de plum'' monologue bc i think it's also very strong#and it has a good callback to uncle reg#but idk i also think doing the song would be very fun and on-theme since it's pride month and the song is a satire of rainbow capitalism#tho i'd probably have to rework the monologue that leads into the song bc even tho i loved the concept i don't think i articulated it well#or i could write an entirely different lead-in and make the previous monologue (''C/H/M'') a separate thing to revise later#which would probably go better and somehow be less work to write. but even so i don't know what the venue's sound setup is
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aroaessidhe · 1 year
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2023 reads // twitter thread      
The Name Bearer
Queer Latinx YA fantasy
a girl destined to bring the newborn king’s name from the flowers of prophecy to them, is instead told she must wait 10 years to find the new true king, and is taken to train in hiding with a group of warrior women
found family, start of series
#The Name Bearer#The Name-Bearer#aroaessidhe 2023 reads#this is. i saw quite a few 3 stars reviews so i went in with certain expectations#i’ve seen some people say the writing is quite young which I guess I agree but it feels quite…fable like?#like I actually like the prose and the vibe!#also interesting  choice to make it 3rd person when the MC keeps changing names - it keeps that very much in the front of your mind#u wouldn’t notice as much if it was 1st person#it def like. speedruns through things too. big time skips. covers one thing in a chapter then that's solved#and quite disjointed too#like you’re just getting fractions of the story retold 100 years later but not rly deeply connected to the characters in the moment#(not literally - it just FEELS that way bc of those things)#I feel like it could have been structured starting from when she leaves the danray place at 18 (?)#and then flip between present and her growing up there and making her friends and slowly revealing the situation from the very beginning.#bc like there are SUCH good characters and ideas and worldbuilding concepts! it just brushes over it all so lightly#also a thing that made me giggle: it's all like latinx worldbuilding and stuff and then introduces this guy as the royal wizard#my literal first note on this book: WIZARD?#it just feels anachronistic. like theres brujos and magia and then just. wizard? sorcerer at least doesnt feel as out of place but sjdgkjfhg#it's only pre-possible relationship in this book but also there was one line that implied the MC might be demi?
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iknityounot · 9 months
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(Long post, sorry y'all)
A little more than two years ago now, my grandmother passed away. She and my grandpa had moved down to my home town a few years before so we could take care of them. I brought them groceries once a week, helped them write checks, fixed tvs, and found lost things. I was really close with my grandma.
In addition to her hilarious personality and dry wit, one of my favorite things about her was that she was a painter and a crafter like me! She used to crochet, and I took her to the craft store a couple of times so she could get more yarn and books on crochet. But her arthritis and the shaking in her hands kept getting worse, so she eventually had to stop.
She kept her most recent project, a granny square blanket, safely packed away in a plastic bin. She told all of us she was going to finish it one day.
Her hands never got better, and when she got sick, and we found out it was cancer, she rapidly deteriorated.
After she passed, I went to work helping my mom clean out my grandparents apartment so we could move my grandpa in with her. In our frantic cleaning, I found that bin again:
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DOZENS of granny squares, dozens of half used skeins. I asked my mom what she wanted me to do with it, and she said she didn't care. I set it aside and later took it home.
Maybe a month later, that tumblr post about the Loose Ends Project was going around. It felt like a sign--I was never going to learn to crochet in order to finish my grandmother's blanket. But they might be able to help!
So I filled out the interest form. They got back to me SUPER quick. And maybe 2 weeks later, I was paired with volunteer in my state (only 2 hours away!) and the box of yarn, granny squares, and my grandmother's crochet hook were in the mail. That was at the end of January this year.
Over the next couple of months, my "finisher" emailed me regular updates on her progress, and asked me questions on my preferences for how she constructed the final blanket.
At the end of August, the blanket was done!
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I had always intended the blanket to be a gift for my mother. So I cleaned it up, put it in the only bag I had big enough to fit it, and drove to my mom's. I gave the blanket to her and she was gobsmacked. I explained to her all about Loose Ends, and how someone volunteered to finish the piece for us. She was speechless. (I was quite pleased with this, because I am not the best at giving gifts, so this was a pretty exciting reaction!)
She said that it was the most thoughtful gift she had ever been given. She said "your grandma would love this". To which I replied, "yeah, I know she really wanted to finish it a couple of years ago". But that was when my mom dropped the bomb of a century on me--she told me that my grandma had started making those granny squares OVER 30 YEARS AGO. She had started the blanket when my grandpa was staying in the hospital, but that was back when my mom was younger than I am now! My grandma had packed them all away, planning on finishing it, when my grandpa was sent home from the hospital. Then it went from house to house, from condo in Chicago to their apartment in my hometown. All that time and my grandma had wanted to finish it, but couldn't. First because she was busy, then because she forgot how to do it, then because of her arthritis, and then because of the cancer. My mom said she had given up on expecting my grandma to finish it. 
She said I brought a piece of her childhood with her mom out of the past.
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And really, all of this is to say, if you have seen or heard about the Loose Ends Project and have an uncompleted project or piece from a loved one who has passed away--these are your people. They were so kind and treated my project with such care. That box probably would have been found by my own grandkids one day if I hadn't heard about Loose Ends.
Five stars, absolutely worth it!
(From what I understand, you can sign up to volunteer too! If you have time to share, it might be worth checking out!)
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facts-i-just-made-up · 2 months
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Not A Joke, Not Unreality:
A company called Quantum Fiber (under Century Link) recently set up my home town for fiber optic internet. I got them a month ago and aside from a few outages it was decent.
Last week, it went out. They sent me a super specific time it would be back-
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They failed to make it and sent another, minutes later.
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And another when that failed.
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And over the week, more and more.
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I called and they just read me the same email out loud. They offered no escalation or resources. Every time, they fail. I have not had internet for my house in a week, and this morning I got this one-
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I looked into other people having the same problem and found this-
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Edit forgot link
That's not something called a "766" line, that's them fucking up my city 766 times. This company is fucking shit, and I'm sick of this. I've filed an FCC complaint but those take a month to even get a reply.
So I'm hoping my 173,365 followers can help make this show of their ineptitude and callousness go viral. Please.
They are in a time of massive expansion into many new states and cities. I am asking anyone so inclined with a few minutes to spare to find your town or state's government information technology office or liaison, or just a local government representative of any kind, and write them a quick note stating that this company destroys town utilities and offers absolute frustrating failures of service in return.
If you have Quantum Fiber and have been similarly failed by them, please file an FCC complaint. You might at least get a free month out of it.
If you work with a news source or popular blog, please boost this however you can.
If you are on any app on which they are present, please feel free to write or tag them and let them know they have failed their customers and cities they work with.
Please do not engage in threats or harassment of any form. Keep this legal, civil, and proper so that it can create a legal basis and record of good citizen interaction on the part of this company's victims. I am asking for help in a grassroots campaign, not a violent or prank-filled heap that just gets people in trouble. AND DO NOT FOR ANY REASON EVER PESTER THE WORKERS, PHONE REPS AND TECHNICIANS THEY HAVE OUT THERE. This is the corporation's fault, not the poor folks they employ who they likely try to make take the backlash.
If you have any other ideas on how to hold a mega-corp responsible for the shit they put their customers through, please comment and recommend. I am sick of this shit. I know there are worse things happening and even worse companies doing horrid things right now. But maybe this one is new/small enough that a viral campaign can kick them where it hurts and get them to act more responsibly to their customers and safely to the places they work.
Please help if you have time. Please spread this in the hopes they see it and get off their butts and fix their horrible shit. Any random reblog or post on any platform might be the one their investors hear of.
Thank you anyone for anything you can do.
-Ari
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autistichalsin · 23 days
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In retrospect, four years later, I feel like the Isabel Fall incident was just the biggest ignored cautionary tale modern fandom spaces have ever had. Yes, it wasn't limited to fandom, it was also a professional author/booktok type argument, but it had a lot of crossover.
Stop me if you've heard this one before: a writer, whether fan or pro, publishes a work. If one were to judge a book by its cover, something we are all taught in Kindergarten shouldn't happen but has a way of occurring regardless, one might find that there was something that seemed deeply problematic about this work. Maybe the title or summary alluded to something Wrong happening, or maybe the tags indicated there was problematic kinks or relationships. And that meant the story was Bad. So, a group of people takes to the Twittersphere to inform everyone who will listen why the work, and therefore the author, are Bad. The author, receiving an avalanche of abuse and harassment, deactivates their account, and checks into a mental health facility for monitoring for suicidal ideation. They never return to their writing space, and the harassers get a slap on the wrist (if that- usually they get praise and high-fives all around) and start waiting for their next victim to transgress.
Sounds awful familiar, doesn't it?
Isabel Fall's case, though, was even more extreme for many reasons. See, she made the terrible mistake of using a transphobic meme as the genesis to actually explore issues of gender identity.
More specifically, she used the phrase "I sexually identify as an attack helicopter" to examine how marginalized identities, when they become more accepted, become nothing more than a tool for the military-industrial complex to rebrand itself as a more personable and inclusive atrocity; a chance to pursue praise for bombing brown children while being progressive, because queer people, too, can help blow up brown children now! It also contained an examination of identity and how queerness is intrinsic to a person, etc.
But... well, if harassers ever bothered to read the things they critique, we wouldn't be here, would we? So instead, they called Isabel a transphobic monster for the title alone, even starting a misinformation campaign to claim she was, in fact, a cis male nazi using a fake identity to psyop the queer community.
A few days later, after days of horrific abuse and harassment, Isabel requested that Clarkesworld magazine pull the story. She checked in to a psych ward with suicidal thoughts. That wasn't all, though; the harassment was so bad that she was forced to out herself as trans to defend against the claims.
Only... we know this type of person, the fandom harassers, don't we? You know where this is going. Outing herself did nothing to stop the harassment. No one was willing to read the book, much less examine how her sexuality and gender might have influenced her when writing it.
So some time later, Isabel deleted her social media. She is still alive, but "Isabel Fall" is not- because the harassment was so bad that Isabel detransitioned/closeted herself, too traumatized to continue living her authentic life.
Supposed trans allies were so outraged at a fictional portrayal of transness, written by a trans woman, that they harassed a real life trans woman into detransitioning.
It's heartbreakingly familiar, isn't it? Many of us in fandom communities have been in Isabel's shoes, even if the outcome wasn't so extreme (or in some cases, when it truly was). Most especially, many of us, as marginalized writers speaking from our own experiences in some way, have found that others did not enjoy our framework for examining these things, and hurt us, members of those identities, in defense of "the community" as a nebulous undefined entity.
There's a quote that was posted in a news writeup about the whole saga that was published a year after the fact. The quote is:
The delineation between paranoid and reparative readings originated in 1995, with influential critic Eve Kosofsky Sedgwick. A paranoid reading focuses on what’s wrong or problematic about a work of art. A reparative reading seeks out what might be nourishing or healing in a work of art, even if the work is flawed. Importantly, a reparative reading also tends to consider what might be nourishing or healing in a work of art for someone who isn’t the reader. This kind of nuance gets completely worn away on Twitter, home of paranoid readings. “[You might tweet], ‘Well, they didn’t discuss X, Y, or Z, so that’s bad!’ Or, ‘They didn’t’ — in this case — ‘discuss transness in a way that felt like what I feel about transness, therefore it is bad.’ That flattens everything into this very individual, very hostile way of reading,” Mandelo says. “Part of reparative reading is trying to think about how a story cannot do everything. Nothing can do everything. If you’re reading every text, fiction, or criticism looking for it to tick a bunch of boxes — like if it represents X, Y, and Z appropriately to my definitions of appropriate, and if it’s missing any of those things, it’s not good — you’re not really seeing the close focus that it has on something else.”
A paranoid reading describes perfectly what fandom culture has become in the modern times. It is why "proship", once simply a word for common sense "don't engage with what you don't like, and don't harass people who create it either" philosophies, has become the boogeyman of fandom, a bad and dangerous word. The days of reparative readings, where you would look for things you enjoyed, are all but dead. Fiction is rarely a chance to feel joy; it's an excuse to get angry, to vitriolically attack those different from oneself while surrounded with those who are the same as oneself. It's an excuse to form in-groups and out-groups that must necessarily be in a constant state of conflict, lest it come across like This side is accepting That side's faults. In other words, fandom has become the exact sort of space as the nonfandom spaces it used to seek to define itself against.
It's not about joy. It's not about resonance with plot or characters. It's about hate. It's about finding fault. If they can't find any in the story, they will, rest assured, create it by instigating fan wars- dividing fandom into factions and mercilessly attacking the other.
And that's if they even went so far as to read the work they're critiquing. The ones they don't bother to read, as you saw above, fare even worse. If an AO3 writer tagged an abuser/victim ship, it's bad, it's fetishism, even if the story is about how the victim escapes. If a trans writer uses the title "I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter" to find a framework to dissect rainbow-washing the military-industrial complex, it's unforgivable. It's a cesspool of kneejerk reactions, moralizing discomfort, treating good/evil as dichotomous categories that can never be escaped, and using that complex as an excuse to heap harassment on people who "deserve it." Because once you are Bad, there is no action against you that is too Bad for you to deserve.
Isabel Fall's story follows this so step-by-step that it's like a textbook case study on modern fandom behavior.
Isabel Fall wrote a short story with an inflammatory title, with a genesis in transphobic mockery, in the hopes of turning it into a genuine treatise on the intersection of gender and sexuality and the military-industrial complex. But because audiences are unprepared for the idea of inflammatory rhetoric as a tool to force discomfort to then force deeper introspection... they zeroed in on the discomfort. "I Sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter"- the title phrase, not the work- made them uncomfortable. We no longer teach people how to handle discomfort; we live in a world of euphemism and glossing over, a world where people can't even type out the words "kill" and rape", instead substituting "unalive" and "grape." We don't deal with uncomfortable feelings anymore; we censor them, we transform them, we sanitize them. When you are unable to process discomfort, when you are never given self-soothing tools, your only possible conclusion is that anything Uncomfortable must be Bad, and the creator must either be censored too, or attacked into conformity so that you never again experience the horrors of being Uncomfortable.
So the masses took to Twitter, outraged. They were Uncomfortable, and that de facto meant that they had been Wronged. Because the content was related to trans identity issues, that became the accusation; it was transphobic, inherently. It couldn't be a critique of bigger and more fluid systems than gender identity alone; it was a slight against trans people. And no amount of explanations would change their minds now, because they had already been aggrieved and made to feel Uncomfortable.
Isabel Fall was now a Bad Person, and we all know what fandom spaces do to Bad People. Bad People, because they are Bad, will always be deserving of suicide bait and namecalling and threatening. Once a person is Bad, there is no way to ever become Good again. Not by refuting the accusations (because the accusations are now self-evident facts; "there is a callout thread against them" is its own tautological proof that wrongdoing has happened regardless of the veracity of the claims in the callout) and not by apologizing and changing, because if you apologize and admit you did the Bad thing, you are still Bad, and no matter what you do in future, you were once Bad and that needs to be brought up every time you are mentioned. If you are bad, you can NEVER be more than what you were at your worst (in their definition) moment. Your are now ontologically evil, and there is no action taken against you that can be immoral.
So Isabel was doomed, naturally. It didn't matter that she outed herself to explain that she personally had lived the experience of a trans woman and could speak with authority on the atrocity of rainbow-washing the military industrial complex as a proaganda tool to capture progressives. None of it mattered. She had written a work with an Uncomfortable phrase for a title, the readers were Uncomfortable, and someone had to pay for it.
And that's the key; pay for it. Punishment. Revenge. It's never about correcting behavior. Restorative justice is not in this group's vocabulary. You will, incidentally, never find one of these folks have a stance against the death penalty; if you did Bad as a verb, you are Bad as an intrinsic, inescapable adjective, and what can you do to incorrigible people but kill them to save the Normal people? This is the same principle, on a smaller scale, that underscores their fandom activities; if a Bad fan writes Bad fiction, they are a Bad person, and their fandom persona needs to die to save Normal fans the pain of feeling Uncomfortable.
And that's what happened to Isabel Fall. The person who wrote the short story is very much alive, but the pseudonym of Isabel Fall, the identity, the lived experiences coming together in concert with imagination to form a speculative work to critique deeply problematic sociopolitical structures? That is dead. Isabel Fall will never write again, even if by some miracle the person who once used the name does. Even if she ever decides to restart her transition, she will be permanently scarred by this experience, and will never again be able to share her experience with us as a way to grow our own empathy and challenge our understanding of the world. In spirit, but not body, fandom spaces murdered Isabel Fall.
And that's... fandom, anymore. That's just what is done, routinely and without question, to Bad people. Good people are Good, so they don't make mistakes, and they never go too far when dealing with Bad people. And Bad people, well, they should have thought before they did something Bad which made them Bad people.
Isabel Fall's harassment happened in early 2020, before quarantine started, but it was in so many ways a final chance for fandom to hit the breaks. A chance for fandom to think collectively about what it wanted to be, who it wanted to be for and how it wanted to do it. And fandom looked at this and said, "more, please." It continues to harass marginalized people, especially fans of color and queen fans, into suffering mental breakdowns. With gusto.
Any ideas of reparative reading is dead. Fandom runs solely on paranoid readings. And so too is restorative justice gone for fandom transgressions, real or imagined. It is now solely about punitive, vigilante justice. It's a concerted campaign to make sure oddballs conform or die (in spirit, but sometimes even physically given how often mentally ill individuals are pushed into committing suicide).
It's a deeply toxic environment and I'm sad to say that Isabel Fall's story was, in retrospect, a sort of event horizon for the fandom. The gravitational pull of these harassment campaigns is entirely too strong now and there is no escaping it. I'm sorry, I hate to say something so bleak, but thinking the last few days about the state of fandom (not just my current one but also others I watch from the outside), I just don't think we can ever go back to peaceful "for joy" engagement, not when so many people are determined to use it as an outlet for lateral aggression against other people.
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lucy-shining-star · 11 months
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Eh I shouldn't be sad because of that
#send someone on facebook birthday wishes and i see they saw that and didn't write back#which i kinda get...aside from fact we did not really have contact in years and we are no friends on facebook even i forgot two previous#years to wish her happy birthday...when i did wish happy new year probably should not do that then#but damn i did remember about her birthday few days before it and recalled few days after it so that was very annoying cause#it was too late#eh i guess it's might be weird to send wishes at all especially if new year ones didn't get answer but well. i kind of feel need#...especially to at at least this time cause it was really annoying last two years recalling it few days later#...also maybe i'm bit sad about that lost contact. i mean i guess it wasn't much but tbh i don't have much contact with anyone#...i also used to call her and then last time i think i kinda wanted to talk too much and told too much about myself (...well more of#ficional shipping) and then she had to finish call and i still feel bad that i talked too much#...and i wanted to next time more of ask things but then in september my phone broke and i lost all numbers and felt to awkward to ask for#number on facebok i guess#...i think it might be reason for unfriending on facebook? i mean that i didn't call...was it that year or next year#anyway yeah i know it's stupid but i'm sad and need to get it out#uh. i was expecting that though i just needed to wish for peace of my mind even if i did expect no answer#so i have to just accept that#...and stop thinking she might answer later she did already read not gonna happen
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chuluoyi · 10 months
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✎ daddy-to-be
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- gojo satoru x reader
in which you're worried about how he'd react to you carrying his baby
genre: fluff and comfort, mentions of pregnancy and dizzy spells
note: i feel soooo warm writing this *sigh* thank u anon who asked this!
a part of gojo's love entries
general masterlist
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"Gojo-sensei! Must we do this?"
"For real?!"
"Okaka..."
"Yoohoo! Hehehehe~"
You sighed at the sight of your tall paintbrush of a husband. Satoru was supposedly teaching his first years—Maki, Panda and Inumaki—and yet, from where you were standing, it looked more like he was bullying them into following his whims more than anything.
A kind reminder that… this silly man is the father of your unborn child.
He didn't know that you were pregnant yet, because you had discovered it just a few days ago and chosen to keep it a secret for the time being.
In theory, this was normal. You two were married and engaged in a high level of sexual activity—something Satoru made sure of—and therefore, conceiving a child was bound to happen sooner or later.
Admittedly, accepting the fact that you were carrying his baby wasn't as easy as you thought, even knowing that. You hadn't seriously talked about having kids, and sure, your husband might have just taken a young cursed boy Yuta into his care—and way before that, Megumi, but it wasn't the same with your own child. It can't be the same.
And not to mention that you two were jujutsu sorcerers. Where would raising a baby fit in this bloody, cursed world you lived in?
...and above all, as things stand now, does Satoru even want a baby?
You released another sigh as you walked away, but then your vision tipped and you had to grab the wall for support. Right, you hadn't even been feeling well these past few days. You got queasy easily, and you experienced sporadic bouts of vertigo too.
"Sensei?" Yuta's worried voice greeted you, and you forced yourself to remain upright. "Are you okay?"
"Ah, yes, I'm fine," you assured him with a smile.
"Should I get Gojo-sensei? You seem pale..."
"No, no, that's—"
"Ooh~ Wifey!"
You cursed his impeccable timing as the striking white hair of your husband came to view. A mischievous grin adorned his face, a bundle of sunshine and trouble as always, as he wrapped an arm around you.
"Don't you have to teach the second years? My pretty wife, you can't be slacking—"
His smile abruptly fell when you subconsciously leaned on him and he noticed your shallow breaths. Satoru promptly tightened his grip on you.
"Yuta," his tone had taken a sharper turn. "Go to the training grounds and train with the others. Class ends after that."
As Yuta nodded and proceeded on his way, he immediately turned to face you. "What's wrong?" he asked with genuine concern. "Are you not feeling well? Can you walk?"
"I'm fine," you insisted, even though the edges of your vision started to blur.
Satoru pursed his lips, and you could tell even with his blindfold on, he was staring at you hard. "Don't be stubborn. Come on, let's get you home."
In an instant, he teleported you back to your shared home, his arms securely under your knees. You didn't know when the dizziness started to ramp up, but you were sure to fall if he didn't have a secure grip on you.
"How long have you been feeling unwell?" he inquired as he carefully lowered you onto your bed.
Realizing there was no point in hiding it any longer, you squeezed your eyes shut as your head rested on the soft pillow. "...since this morning."
Satoru expressed his dissatisfaction with a grunt. "In that case, you shouldn't have gone to school. From now on, you're on leave."
He fussed over you—removing your shoes, fine-tuning the air conditioner, and ensuring you were snug in bed. "What is causing you to feel this bad? Is it something you ate? We had dinner together, and I feel perfectly fine..."
You raised your gaze to him just as he tore off his blindfold, his eyes locking with yours. The blue of his eyes scrutinizing and assessing you, and suddenly, you felt insecure as he quirked an eyebrow, seemingly suspecting something. “Is there something you aren't telling me?”
This is it. You couldn't keep this from him any longer. This was his child as much as yours, he had to know for you to be able to decide on the next steps.
You exhaled. "I'm… pregnant."
Silence. For the next five seconds, you could've sworn that Satoru held his own breath.
"Pregnant?" he repeated, stunned, widened cerulean marbles blinking several times. "You...?"
You sat up, reaching for your nightstand and retrieving the five pregnancy tests you had stashed in the drawer, handing them to him.
Satoru fixed his gaze onto the two red lines on the sticks, examining them and then shifting his eyes between you and them several times. You didn't dare to look at him, feeling your hands starting to shake and your gut twisting.
But contrary to your dread, before you could blink, he pulled you into his embrace. Your heart melted as he softly murmured, "Dummy, why didn't you tell me sooner?"
"I... I was worried. I didn't think I..."
He nuzzled into your neck, breathing in deeply. "Silly... I'm supposed to be your safe space. You can and absolutely should tell me these kind of things..."
A lingering fear persisted in your gut as you croaked out, "Are you... okay with it?"
Satoru snapped his head so quickly, his brow furrowed. "What do you mean—of course I am! Why wouldn't I be?"
You didn't know why, but his impromptu and steadfast declaration brought tears to your eyes.
"Stupid," he chided, his voice tinged with slight giddiness and overflowing fondness, and doubled with the wide grin on his face, you were starstruck. Holding your hand, he pressed a tender kiss on your knuckles, and then on the wedding band resting on your ring finger.
His sincere, warm eyes spoke volumes as he said, "You are my beautiful, lovely, and amazing wife. And now you're about to make me a daddy. Why wouldn't I be thrilled about that?"
You had given him love that saved him in countless ways, some of which you might not even realize. And now, you were about to gift him another piece of you to love—his own family to cherish. Satoru was convinced he couldn't love you more than he did in this moment.
You cried even harder, wiping your face sloppily as you pouted at him, voice clogged with tears, a mixture of relief and happiness overwhelming you. "Why are you so s-sweet? You're u-usually... such a menace..."
"Hey! That's slander! I'm always nice to you!" he protested with a mock frown, trying to lighten the mood.
Satoru brought you into his arms again, affectionately stroking your hair. His excitement was palpable as he chuckled gleefully at the very idea of becoming a father to a mini-him or you in a not-so-distant future.
With that sentiment in mind, he genuinely meant every word of what he softly uttered in your ear:
"I love you, sweetheart. And mark my words—with everything I have, I won't let anything happen to you or our baby… I swear it."
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loveluvrs · 5 months
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the slip up l lando norris x reader
request/summary – lando and reader are in a secret established relationship, until lando accidentally slips up on stream
author's notes – first piece of writing, feedback appreciated!!! this is just my thoughts written down honestly, i didn’t have much idea where i was going with it so enjoy.
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Max was streaming with Lando at his place. Lando drags his feet over to the stream room, sitting on a chair next to Max. He was scrolling on his phone, trying to pass the time. 
“Mate, I’m gonna leave, you’re being so boring,” Lando joked under his breath as he ran a hand through his hair. 
“I’ll make things more interesting then. Chat, wanna know something really interesting about Lando?” Max asked with a mischievous smile as he looked back at Lando. Lando watched with suspicion of what max could say next. 
“Lando’s got a secret girlfriend,” Max sings to annoy Lando. Lando’s eyes shot up, his heart pounding as he turned off his phone, the same phone he was using to text you, his girlfriend. “I don’t, chat, don’t listen to him. He’s just trying to piss me off,” Lando says as he shoots Max a glare. 
—————
A few months later, everyone has chalked up that interaction to Max simply trying to annoy and rile up Lando, and no one thought much of it. On a miracle of a night in spring, Lando was in Monaco and decided to stream. He had a hoodie on, his hair all messy, but a smile on his face. About an hour into the stream, I knock on the door of his stream room quietly. Lando immediately turned off his video and mic, telling chat to give him a minute. 
I walk in, a black slip dress on with a cropped white cardigan, my hair and makeup done all fancy. “Hi, baby,” Lando says as he pulls me in by the waist, onto his lap. “Girls night tonight, right?” He says with a soft smile. He always makes sure to pay attention to anything I’ve mentioned to him, including my plans to hang out with Lily and Carmen tonight, Alex and George’s girlfriends. 
I hum in response. “Yeah, we’re gonna get dinner and then take some Instagram photos,” I say as I stand up from his lap, “you like the dress? It’s new.” I give him a little twirl to show off the dress. 
Lando smiles brightly. “I love it, baby, you look gorgeous. Like always,” he says as he leans in for a kiss. “Text me when you’re done and need me to pick you up, yeah?” I nod and smile. 
Once I leave, Lando puts his headset back on, turning his mic and camera back on. He scrunches up his face as he’s met by shouting from Max into his headset. “What’s your problem, man?” Lando asks with confusion. Max sighs. “Lando, you had your mic on the whole time. People heard that whole conversation and I was trying to tell you but as always, you ignored me,” Max says with some frustration in his voice, but mostly amusement. 
“Oh,” Lando says as he realizes what has happened. Not knowing what to do, Lando panics and ends stream. 
When my friends and I reach the restaurant, we find it pouring rain, which was the most of our worries since the restaurant was outdoor. With frowns, we all pile back into the car and drive ourselves home. I arrive home only twenty minutes after I left, my dress soaked. My brows furrow in confusion to see Lando on the couch on his phone when i come back, and not on stream. 
I slip off my shoes. “I thought you were streaming?” I ask softly as I make my way over to him. “What happened to you? You’re all soaked! Here, let me get you a towel and you can get dressed into some of my hoodie and sweats to get comfy,” Lando says, trying to avoid the fact that he had just live streamed his whole conversation with his girlfriend. 
I saw the panic in Lando’s eyes. “Stop,” I say as I stood in front of him, “what did you do?” Lando shoots me a bright grin. “I love you, babe. So so much. And you know I’d do anything for you.” This made me even more suspicious. “Lan,” I say as my eyes narrowed.
“Okay, okay. I might have forgotten to mute my mic when we were talking right before you left. I swear I thought I had turned it off!” He says as he panics before beginning to ramble. “And I called you baby, and gorgeous, and your voice was heard too. And Max was telling me the whole time through my headset, but it was off and even if it were on, you know I don’t think about anything else when I’m with you. And there were thousands of people on the stream and you specifically told me you wanted to keep it private because you didn’t want to get hate crimed by the fans and you wouldn’t be able to handle it and I mean, I wanted to but it just slipped and im so so sorry but-“ He stops in confusion when a giggle escapes my lips. “Why aren’t you upset?” He asks slowly.
I smile as I slip my arms around his neck, his hands instinctively wrapping around my waist. “Well. Number one, you’re cute when you panic. Number two, no one saw me, so it’s okay. I mean, considering how in love you are with me, they were bound to find out at some point that you had a girlfriend,” I tease with a smile tugging at my lips. 
He scoffs and rolls his eyes playfully at me. “Okay, yeah. I am absolutely in love with you. Still, you’re not bothered by this?” he asks slowly, hesitation lacing his voice.
“I promise I’m not. It was a mistake. Plus, that just means it’s gonna be all the more fun trying to watch them figure out who it is you’re dating,” I say playfully with a giggle. 
“That’s true,” Lando says softly with a hum, “I love you.”
“I love you too. Although, don’t make me have to have you on adult supervision every time you stream now to make sure nothing else slips out of your mouth,” I tease as I playfully poke his side. 
“Ah! Okay okay, promise,” he says with a giggle as he leans in for a gentle and loving kiss.
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