#I usually post at the evening in my timezone and I am keeping it up but it is afternoon here in north Carolina

[girafferoyalty]

Had to do the Barbie & Ken meme from twitter with them, bc why not

[tavyliasin]

Villain-Fucker Angst Hours

Good timezone, darlings~ Are you ready to get all up in your feelings? No? Me neither, loves, but here we are regardless so the words are going to flow as they usually do... This is focused on Raphael from Baldur's Gate 3 and his fandom, but the latter section can easily apply to any villain fandom.

Self-Analysis of Devil-Fuckery, Or Why Do I Adore Raphael When He Is Very Obviously Evil: A Short Essay by TavyliaSin (Who Still Cannot Name Anything With Less Than A Full Paragraph) ((NSFW)) (((Game Spoilers)))

The following may discuss heavier topics, but without specifics, so whilst it should be safe for most to read without triggering any difficult memories please be aware of Raphael's entire vibes, the content and context of his story, and I'd also like to mention that this isn't a "woe be us for we are terrible people" piece, it's actually more about:

"There is an inherent kindness and warmth to much of the Raphael fandom, and I think there could be some common threads behind that, pulling us all in closer in a comforting blanket that we wrap around each other to keep out the cold of the world."

So, what in the nine hells am I on about? Well. Raphael-fandom is a wild and wonderful place to be. The rest is in sections, so feel free to skip through to what you feel is relevant to your interests. I am so prone to waffle I should open a restaurant~

Who Are Fans Of Raphael? What Do They Want?

We are feral, unhinged, all sheets to the wind "I want that devil man, carnally, and there is no force in all the planes that could stop me". There's the vanilla to the extreme and every level in between, tops, bottoms, versatiles, Doms, subs, and switches - there are a whole lot of people who would love to get their hands on either (or both) of Raphael's forms, for a simple smooch or something far more spicy~ [edited in] To add on to this, not all of us even desire him in a sexual way, for many it is romantic, soft, or even just the rather pleasant thought of spending an evening with drinks by the hellfire because he would be fascinating company. Aces, Aros, and AroAces may all find themselves well within the devilish corners of fandom too~ which is a whole other essay~ [end edit] So, I see you. I'm one of you. Extremely loud and utterly hingeless in my fan appreciation for Raphael. He's one of my favourites to write about, I seek art of him, and the same goes for his mirrored other half, Haarlep, who I arguably love more despite there being far less content of them in the game.

And the Fandom? The Vibe?

From my experience in the Raphael Fandom areas, we have a very deep and abiding understanding of consent, respect, and treating each other with an absolute and uncompromising kindness. We've had talks about keeping each other safe in fandom, exchanged details of people we have encountered who need to be avoided, even shared details between moderators of different fandom servers to pre-ban people proven to be creeps and/or art thieves. We've also discussed consent, including the issues with it in the game, and how areas of the story can only really be considered dubious at best and could easily be triggering for people. And these discussions have been open, honest, fair, and with the acknowledgement that most of us love these scenes anyway. So there's a sense of care that runs through everything, behind the horny-posting and fan content, behind the endless thirsting after our favourite fictional characters. We have a depth of kindness that warms my sinners soul every time I see it.

What Does This Have To Do With Self-Reflection, Raphael, or Villainy In General?

Well let's look at Raphael. He's a villain, obviously. He's manipulative, devious, and inherently evil by his very nature. He keeps Hope chained in his basement, constantly subjected to endless torture. There's also mention of how Gortash was sold into his service at a young age, clearly not an enjoyable experience given the other details and how things turn out (particularly as Raphael would need Gortash's own plans to fail entirely in order for him to succeed in his own and get that crown). And as fans, we accept that. We don't sit making excuses, or trying to say "well actually Gortash is a little shit and Hope probably deserve it", and we don't shy away from or conveniently ignore those darker sides of him with malicious intent to enable more evil to flourish. What I noticed, when I allowed the thoughts to continue, is that there is a theme here.

If Evil Can Be Loved Then So Can I

That's the core. Of course, darlings, I am not claiming to be a heinous monster. I certainly do not have a laundry list of crimes that would make the devil himself say "Uh, that's a bit much." But I sure as fuck treat myself like I do sometimes. You see, I think a lot of us have that tendency, to judge ourselves far more harshly than anyone else. Our patience, understanding, and forgiveness for others runs deeper than the Mariana Trench, but when it comes to our own flaws? One minor mistake and we think ourselves to be the worst beings ever to disgrace the earth. Thus, the villainy we see reflects how we are treating ourselves. So by loving and accepting all of those things that should be terrible, hated, we are actually learning that no matter how poorly we think of ourselves that we can be worthy of that same love and acceptance. We are extending the affection we are unable to show ourselves to someone we see the worst parts of ourselves amplified within. And that's why villains attract the people with the most kindness. The most forgiveness. Because it takes someone with a truly huge amount of empathy to find love for the embodiment of evil.

Or, IDK, maybe villains are just hot and we're too far down to care.

But wait, before you go!

THERE'S SOMETHING WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT.

All of this is about FICTION. We should never be accepting of the kinds of evil we see in the game irl. We do not owe anyone kindness if they do not show it to us.

What is hot in fiction is not always OK IRL.

Look after yourselves out there, remember that consent is key in all things, and please do try to learn to love yourselves, darlings, you are worthy of it and you should judge yourself by the same standard you judge others. If you are in doubt, if you are worried, if you feel afraid - reach out, talk to someone. There are many who will listen.

Treat yourself as you would treat a friend. You deserve that much.

Oh, and all Raphael fans who understand kindness are welcome around me, any hour of the day, I adore our little fandom circles and would gladly collect all of us together. I'm following a lot of you as soon as I find you, like hunting shiny pokemon~

See you in Avernus, my darling Little Mice, may we all find joy in the Cambion's Embrace~

[mufos-photo-album]

I miss the Cinnamoroll collab mainly for the wax event (think geyser/grandma) it had. For those not in the know, during the event the Tiptoeing Teabrewer would sit by their oven as cinnamon rolls popped out, which players could burn for wax/light.

Me missing this event isn't 100% to do with wanting more wax sources, though it certainly is a part of it. Rather, it has to do with timing.

For context, events like geyser/grandma/sunset take place on even hours in my timezone (at 2:00, at 4:00, etc). When it was still around, the cinnamon roll event would take place on odd hours (at 1:00, at 3:00, etc, in my time zone) -- its possible they occurred more frequently but I don't really remember. I'm the kind of player who pops into Sky whenever they feel like it, so half the time I'm either in time or late for geyser/grandma/all even-houred events. Having the cinnamon roll event around was nice because it gave me something to do during the odd hours, while the other wax events are over. Nowadays though, if I've already done my dailies and I see that its an odd hour, I usually log out right then and there. This is opposed to if it was an even hour, where if I could make it, I would do geyser/grandma.

The point I'm trying to make is that at the moment, there are optimal times to play Sky, which is detrimental for those with schedules that can't be online for those hours.

For the cafe in particular, I can kinda see why they removed the wax event. Keeping it would make it so players only really appear at XYZ time, somewhat acting against its purpose as a social space. So, replacing the event with a reward the player can pick up at any time of the day makes it so there's an average amount of activity at all times.

That aside though, still would be nice to have another wax event(s) that takes place in the empty hours between geyser/grandma/sunset. If there were concerns about players getting too much wax with the addition of another wax event, each of the events can just share a wax cap -- much like the other wax events already have. Maybe there could be issues with players feeling like they need to get to every wax event, however I find that feeling already exists with the wax events we have. This could be especially so now because there are optimal hours where these events occur.

IDK. It's 2 AM right now (though I'll probably schedule this to be posted at a more sensible time) and maybe my sleepiness is rendering me too short-sighted to see the full consequences of this suggestion.

Gootnight.

[destiny-in-the-universe]

The Crossover No One Asked For

Alright so,

This became a little pet project to indulge on both of my active fixations. It has turned into a secret ploy to keep RC9GN from completely leaving as a hyperfixation because the series and its fandom changed everything for me- I'd hate to leave it behind, but here we go...

This is mostly for me to toss out ideas; if I keep going back and forth between subjects, I am deeply sorry pfft. Also keep in mind this may be a fanfic so I won’t be sharing everything!

Wordgirl x RC9GN Crossover

Timeline

~ This is set post-canon when it comes to RC9GN! McFist and Viceroy are still active as villains, but have gradually calmed down since the Sorcerer's defeat. Randy is 15 at the moment

~ He's also a sophomore or borderline close to entering junior year because of when I decided his birthday was

~ This also takes place post-canon for Wordgirl unless I decide to change my mind about it! Currently, the idea is that she's 12 or so when the crossover starts! She's at the cusp of reaching high school

Now onto the main order of things!

~ As a result of it being summer, the Botsford's (including Huggy) take a trip to Norrisville, OK. Granted, the history of the Ninja isn't shared across other cities - due to ahems certain reasons which will be disclosed later

~ the Ninja is going through a period of inactivity, but of course this won't last forever. Unfortunately, it does mean Randy's a bit paranoid about an attack happening unexpectedly

~ The Botsford's are staying at one of the hotels owned by McFist on the pretense of I said so and well, a lot is sponsored by McFist anyway so-

~ Things happen when Becky sees the Ninja swinging by in front of her window. Not having the slightest clue what's going on, she takes off - under the pretense that she's going sightseeing - and follows the Ninja

~ After a brief moment of mistaken identity and misunderstandings, Wordgirl and the Ninja reluctantly become as close to allies as it can get but as per usual - it seems something's happening behind closed doors

~ McFist appears to be in cohorts with... [REDACTED]. I can't very well share everything in one go, now can I?

~ The Ninja and his newfound ally decide to take on McFist, but unfortunately... things happen to go south after that. With the CEO's claims he has managed a way to rid of the Ninja permanently, among other things - who knows what might happen from this?

Headcanons and Ramblings

Becky/Wordgirl is not fond of the slang used in Norrisville. She gradually learns to put up with it since Randy uses it every other sentence

They do not have the perfect alliance at first! The Ninja sees Wordgirl as condescending while Wordgirl thinks the Ninja can come off as arrogant. Needless to say, it’s going to be interesting!

At some point, they meet as Becky and Randy and somehow manage to get along better. Neither seem to have discovered their hero counterparts

This doesn’t happen in this specific part of the crossover, but Debbie and Scoops would not get along. It’s even worse when it’s Scoops and Heidi. I think they could reach a point of being friends but it’ll take time

McFist and Mr. Big would NOT get along. They would hate each other but undisclosed things happen in this universe that fuel it even more and I will not say anything more

Becky and Theresa would be the best of fucking friends

I don’t remember who first headcanoned this but Becky would understand the Nomicon lessons a lot better than Randy. The Narrator and the Nomicon’s essence joke about how much it takes Randy to get the message

Well. This is all you’re getting for the time being! I’m hoping to transform my idea into a fanfiction so be on the lookout for that- though for now, I wish you a fantastic evening! Or any other timezone you might be a part of~

[coffeeghoulie]

Kinktober Day #22: Sexting

The Ghostober prompts were put together by @kroas-adtam, and divider made by @gothdaddyissues, thank you both so much!

Pairing: Swiss/Dew

Summary: Dew and Swiss's teams play on opposite sides of the country, but that won't stop them from getting up to their usual antics.

Takes place in a scene mentioned in chapter four of Five Minutes for Fighting, but if you don't want to read a 15k fic right now, Swiss and Dew are on opposing hockey teams and speedrunning an enemies to lovers arc. They're about 75% of the way there in this fic. I wasn't comfortable enough writing smut to write this scene out when I posted that chapter, but I am now. Tada!

Contains mutual masturbation, phone sex, and two idiots pining for each other.

Tagging @forlorn-crows, @nocturnalghoul, @askingforthesun, and @highdefinitions for hockey ghoul reasons <3 and a special thank you to @highdefinitions for helping me with Swiss's team's name.

Read under the cut or on AO3!

Dew flops down on the hotel mattress, a bit too firm for his taste, and grabs his phone off of the nightstand. In the time it took for him to wash the sweat from his hair and change into comfortable clothing, he's gotten a new message.

S: Saw the highlights from the Ghouls game tonight. A lot of those clips were you.

Dew preens, even though he knows the other man's just trying to butter him up. He did play well. When he really applies himself, when he gets in the zone, when he's not picking fights with Swiss for fun, he's one of the top scorers on the roster.

He runs through the game schedules in his mind, trying to remember the next time the Popestars, Swiss's team, and the Ghouls play. It's not for a couple of weeks, but Dew does remember that the Popestars were scheduled to play the Holy Hitters a few hours prior. Dew opens his phone, starts texting back.

D: Didn't you skate tonight? When the fuck did you have time to watch Ghouls highlights?

S: At the hotel now. You took some big hits tonight, spitfire

Dew groans at the reminder, sore ribs and shoulder lighting up. He had been checked pretty good, slammed into the plexiglass by defensemen almost twice his size trying to steal the puck away from him.

S: Got me all worked up, watching you get tossed around like a ragdoll.

D:Real subtle. You don't want to praise me for my good game, you just want to burn off that adrenaline.

S: So? What's the difference between me texting you and me railing your ass in your locker room shower?

Dew groans, even as his cock twitches in interest at the memories. He palms at himself through his sweatpants.

D: The difference is that you're on the other side of the fucking country and can't actually fuck me.

Dew can almost hear Swiss's chuckle as the text bubble pops up.

S: Oh, so you wouldn't mind if I texted you what I'd want us to be doing if we were in the same timezone?

Dew takes a deep breath through his nose, hair fanned out under his head. He presses the heel of his hand harder into his dick, groaning.

D: Fine. Yes. What would you want?

Dew turns his head to groan into the pillows as he palms himself, reading Swiss's reply.

S: I keep thinking about the night you snuck into my hotel room, the night your captain really fucked me up? The first night I got to have you in an actual bed. I want to do that again. Really take my time with you.

Dew fumbles one handed with the drawstrings on his sweatpants, texting back with his dominant hand. He pushes his hand down his sweats and boxers, palming himself with a groan.

D: You wanna take me apart again? You gonna be real sweet about it, like you were then, or do you want to push me around like in the showers?

S: I was thinking about how easy it would be to manhandle you, take you how I want. I know it's a bit of a sore point, but you're so much smaller than me. My hands nearly wrap all the way around your waist, spitfire. It makes you quick and hard to hit on the ice, but fuck, if it doesn't get me going. Wanna hold you down and make you take it.

Dew groans loudly. wrapping his hand around himself properly, his length beginning to spit precum. He shoves his sweats and underwear down, freeing himself, giving himself more room to work.

D: Yeah? you gonna make me take it rough, split me open on you? You want me to fight back or take it nice?

S: I don't think it was gonna be rough. Sure that's how we started, but I liked being sweet on you, making you feel good.

Even though there's no one there to see him blush, Dew turns his face into the pillows and whines, high and feminine. He steels himself and scowls, typing frantically.

D: Fucking sap.

S: You liked it. You were the one who asked to take our time to begin with.

D: Fine. You caught me.

S: I'm calling you. Pick up.

Dew freezes as his phone rings, blaring the Popestars' goal song. It had been a funny joke, assigning that song to Swiss's contact, but he's pavloved himself on the ice when they play against each other. He wants to hear it more than he wants Mountain to make the save.

He picks up, and the warm sound of Swiss's voice filters through, a little tinny from the speakers. "Hey, spitfire," he groans, and Dew's stomach flips as he hears the wet noise of Swiss touching himself.

"You get started without me?" Dew says, trying and failing to mock him.

Swiss laughs, the sound fading into a low groan. "You can't tell me you haven't started. I know how flustered you get when I talk dirty, spitfire."

Dew rolls his eyes, grateful Swiss can't actually see it. He presses the heel of his hand into his dick, biting back the resulting groan. "Yeah, and what about it?"

"You blush so pretty," Swiss says, and Dew can picture him, sprawled out on his hotel bed over the covers, his dirty clothes strewn in a pile on the bathroom floor, one hand wrapped around his cock, the other pressing his phone to his ear. "You turn cherry red from the tips of your ears all the way down to your nipples, makes your piercings really stand out. You know your dick turns the same color when you start to drip?"

Dew can't bite back his whimper, and he curses himself as he hears Swiss's hand falter on himself. "Shut up," he whines.

Swiss chuckles, and Dew privately, secretly, wishes he could record the sound, replay it whenever he wants. "You don't want me to shut up, spitfire. You want me to keep talking so you can get off to it."

Dew sets the phone down next to him on speaker, biting the heel of his hand hard as he starts jerking himself off again. "What- what about it?" He pants, trying to keep his cool as Swiss's voice makes his dick twitch.

"It's okay, spitfire, I know what gets you off, want to make you feel good even though I can't do it myself," Swiss coos, voice slightly tinny. "Jerk yourself off for me, want to hear how good you feel."

Dew can't help but obey, rubbing his thumb against the tip of his dick, watching fascinated as it drips precum down his shaft, easing the way for his hand. He knows there's a travel size bottle of lube in his go bag, but he can't be damned to get up and get it. He doesn't want to leave his phone behind, even though it's on speaker and he'll still be able to hear.

"Swiss," he whispers, scared one of his teammates will be able to hear on the other side of the wall, even though he's safe behind soundproof hotel walls. "Swiss, fuck, please."

"Yeah, spitfire?" Swiss replies, sounding entirely too collected as he strokes himself vigorously on the other line. "Tell me what you want."

"Wanna be with you, want it to be your hand on me, want to get my hands on you," Dew whispers, face hot and eyes squeezed shut as Swiss makes him describe his desires. He strokes himself faster, reaching down with his free hand to pull at his piercings. He keens, and he can hear Swiss's responding groan, the wet noises from the other end speeding up.

"Want to get my mouth on you again, spitfire," Swiss groans, and Dew speeds his own strokes up to match Swiss's pace. Swiss only lets the pleasure affect him when he's close, and Dew doesn't want to be too far behind when he cums. "You tasted so good, such a sweet mouthful for me."

Dew sobs, cock kicking in his hand as he pinches his nipple hard, pebbling the pink flesh. "Close," he whines, jerking himself off furiously, his cock weeping precum.

"Yeah, spitfire, baby?" Swiss moans. "You gonna cum for me? So far away from you but I'm still gonna make you cum, spitfire."

"Yeah, you are. Fuck," Dew whines, muffling the sound into his hand.

"Hand off of your mouth, baby. Need to hear it, Dew, need it so bad. Need you so bad," Swiss whines, and Dew can hear his breath hitch as his hand speeds up. "Gonna cum for you, princess, gonna make a mess just for you."

"Do it," Dew pants, "I'm gonna cum, Swiss, please cum with me."

Swiss shouts wordlessly, and the slightly-warped noise is all it takes to send Dew flying over the edge himself. He shoots ropes of hot, pearly cum over his knuckles, pooling in his happy trail, wailing the whole time he works himself through it.

"Good boy," Swiss groans, and Dew's seen him in the aftermath enough times to picture his face in perfect clarity, brows furrowed, eyes shut tight, chest heaving as he breathes heavily through his nose. The mental image is enough to make his dick kick valiantly between his legs, but he ignores it, still floating on the high.

"Fuck me, Swiss," Dew laughs, trying to catch his breath. "I just got out of the shower. Wouldn't have washed up if I knew you were just gonna make me make a mess again."

Swiss chuckles on the other end. He hears the rustle of him running a hand over his curls. "You wanna send me a picture, spitfire? I'd like to save that for later."

Dew groans, tilting his head back into the pillows. "Fuck, Swiss, you can't just say that."

"Well, I did," Swiss laughs, but Dew can still hear his heavy breathing. "How about this, you send me a picture of your mess, I'll send you one of mine. Deal?"

Dew moans at the thought, his cum still dripping from his fingers. "Yeah, I'll do it, give me a minute."

"No rush," Swiss says, voice evening out. "Just wanna see what I do to you. Bet you look real pretty, spitfire. It's a shame they're not my bruises on that pretty body."

"Possessive," Dew laughs, chest still heaving. "Give it a couple weeks, you can bruise me up all you want. Make me bleed, even."

There's a long silence, and Dew's suddenly unsure of the words he's just said.

"I don't think I want to make you bleed anymore, Dew," Swiss says, something strange in his tone. "Bruises, marks, sure. I don't think I want you to bleed."

"Huh," Dew says eloquently. "Okay. No bleeding, then. We can work with that."

Swiss sighs, and Dew can imagine him nodding. "Alright. I do mean it, Dew. You played well tonight."

"Thank you," Dew whispers. "I'll look for your highlights after I shower. After the picture, I mean."

Swiss chuckles. "Tonight wasn't my best game," he admits. "I didn't play nearly as well as you did, spitfire."

Dew cackles, wiping the sweat from his forehead with his clean hand. "I'll be the judge of that, Swiss. We play again in what, three weeks?"

"Yeah, think so," Swiss says.

"Think I'm gonna let you go in a bit," Dew says, hesitantly, trying not to show how clingy he wants to be. "I'll get you that picture, and then I'm going to run up this hotel's hot water bill. Got a bus ride in the morning and I hate sleeping on the bus. I'll see you at the next game?"

"Yeah, spitfire," Swiss says fondly, and his voice almost feels almost like a caress against his hot cheek. "I'll see you at the next game."

There will be no next game. Swiss gets traded to the Ghouls a week from this moment, but neither of them know that yet. How could they? For now, they bask in the afterglow, listening to each other breathe thousands of miles apart.

[heybaetae]

alright, his letter really got me.

if i can get kinda personal really quick—which i usually avoid doing too much—i promise it’s warranted if you feel like reading to the end of this post in which i’m about to share some things about a deeply painful experience i went through this year and am still enduring the weight of. if you follow me closely enough, you probably know what i’m referring to…

before i do though, i want to mention how truly mind blowing it is that someone who already means a lot to you can somehow keep becoming more and more important as time goes on without even doing much, really, just by being there. since the start of the year, i have not been in the best mental state. i suffer from anxiety and depression which causes me to have a really tough time sleeping and it’s only gotten worse over the months.

i cannot stress enough how many times jungkook lifted my spirit and my mood on some of my worst days/nights since he started doing his frequent weverse lives. it sounds bleak to say because it is, but he was one of the only constant sources of light in my life this year. i can’t tell you how many times it felt like whenever i was feeling my lowest or was riddled with dread about something, i’d suddenly get a notif that he was live. like he’d just pop up when i’d need a distraction the most. even if it was a temporary relief, it would often help take my mind off of things and sometimes it was the only time i’d smile or laugh in an entire week. he was already such a comforting person to me, but it was only amplified every time he went live seeking the same feeling and i quickly found a lot of solace in the thought that we both seeked a familiar warmth for a while. i think a lot of people felt the same. i was seriously getting though the first half of the year thanks to the music the members were releasing and jk’s lives. that’s it. not much else was driving me forward.

then june 11th happened. that morning, i was woken up by my mom telling me my older sister was unresponsive in the hospital. i won’t go into specifics of what happened, but i ended up spending the whole day at home alone while the rest of my family rushed to the hospital. i couldn’t go with them. i knew i wasn’t going to be able to handle it and that made me feel absolutely riddled with guilt. instead, i spent hours in bed just waiting for text updates of what was going on, but they were few and far between. all i’d been told was that they were going to turn her life support off at some point in the day and i hadn’t heard anything after that for a few hours, so i didn’t know if it had happened yet or not for what felt like ages. i felt totally in the dark.

so i was laying there feeling numb, not doing anything but trying to reconcile with losing a sibling so soon and staring at my phone, willing news to come through but also praying it would stay silent. in my denial, silence meant what was happening wasn’t actually happening.

then that 🌟 JK live notif came through out of no where and i felt my heart literally stutter because there was just no fucking way. this was the first time i’d ever gotten that notif at that hour in my timezone. he rarely did morning lives, what on earth could he be doing? why now? why why why?

absolutely nothing in that moment was more important than my sister and what my family was experiencing, but there was literally nothing that i or anyone could do. i was helpless and unable to process the million thoughts and questions running through my head. in my desperate need for that familiar comfort, that distraction, i eagerly clicked the notif and was faced with those big, ridiculous brown eyes blinking at me sideways over the top of a blanket in his bed too. “you can’t be serious,” i said to my screen out loud and then i fucking laughed. incredulously, in disbelief, in amusement, in horror, in grief, in happiness, all of the above.

“how did you know?” i wanted to sob, but all i could do was keep laying there, practically comatose (for lack of a better word), as i watched who had steadily become what felt like my closest and dearest friend across the ocean tell me he wanted company falling asleep. it almost felt like a sick joke the universe was playing on me. like hey, you need a distraction from something really bad happening and it’s not gonna change a thing and it’s parasocial as fuck, but it’s literally the only thing that’s been working so far up until this point aka the lowest point. so here he is, the booooy.

anyway, he fell asleep. i finally rested my eyes. my thoughts calmed down for a brief while. frankly, at the risk of sounding insane, i felt like i was being looked after. supported? no, he had no clue. he was in dreamland and his arm was twitching. he hadn’t even said much after the first few minutes and once he passed out, all that mattered until it would inevitably be cut off was the fact that he was just… there.

my sister passed away not too long after the live was turned off. i wasn’t told until a couple hours later, but the fact is this: in the hour leading up to it, i was successfully distracted and i was comforted. of course, it didn’t last long but it had helped me in the moment i most needed it (again, but x10000) and i am forever in jungkook’s debt for those last few moments of solitude before my entire year was flipped on a permanent axis that day. i’m with one less sister and the grief has been insurmountable.

so i just wanna say if it’s seemed like i’ve been leaning a bit more on jungkook than usual this year, this is why. he’s just been an angel for me, quite literally. it’s also why i refuse to entertain any messages i receive slandering him for whatever reason or accusing me of favoring him over anyone else lately when that’s just not the case. i’m just trying to get by. i’m channeling my grief into my content, my creations, and in doing so, i am channeling my love and appreciation into what is getting me through it the most. so it’s a waste of time to twist it into something it isn’t and i’ll only ever give you a pity laugh and move on. none of the kpop industry jargon that people get mad about these days matters to me at all and life is too short to waste being angry about shit you can’t control. you don’t know what people are going through and you don’t know what someone means to someone else or why. so put your energy towards things that make you happy instead. you’ll feel better. i never owed an explanation, but there it is if you’ve been looking for one.

to wrap this up, i didn’t think i’d ever write any of this down and i could probably write essays just as long as this one for all the other members and what they did for me this year too. it’s going to be incredibly hard to see them go. my ult bias for-fucking-ever, my taehyung, i simply do not know how i’m going to get through my days without him. i just can’t picture or fathom it and i don’t fucking want to. he’s my favorite person in the world. i will be so empty with him gone. there are no words for how painful it’ll be so i’m not even gonna try to find them. my sweet jimin who also brings so much comfort and hilarity into my life, i simply cannot stomach the thought of him going away. my dear namjoon who i swear to god yanks my ass back up above water when i feel like i’m drowning in my feelings and inspires me to be better, what the hell am i gonna do? i’m already spiraling without yoongi’s tranquility. and of course, jungkook, who you now know has just been an incredibly special presence in my life this year. someone i’ve learned so much from, laughed with, cried with, eaten with, rested with, who showed up for me over and over and over and has no idea the impact he had, how grateful i am. i’ll never be able to thank him. thank you thank you thank you for being there for me. thank you all the members for fucking being there for me literally all the time.

this sucks! this sucks but i’m gonna power through it with the rest of you. i’m gonna try.

[skzoologist]

My mooties

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⤐ @dmnksrt - One of my irl best friends, you guys can thank her for so much, because she is my number 1 fan and keeps cheering me on. Without her, I wouldn't have written this much. She's a victim of accidentally being converted into a kpop fan, purely because I was also dragged into the fandom. Even though she stans another group and man (Suga), we still ramble to each other for hours easily. Once she gathers the courage to post her own fanfics, you can be sure I'll be there to support her immediately. Her brain is wonderful, just like her, I wouldn't hesitate to commit arson for her sake. Her tag is 'my Darling', no, we aren't dating, in case any of Nat's anons come here asking that.

⤐ @nerenbe - Well well well, if it isn't my menace herself. This lil gremlin is the sole reason I am in this fandom altogether, since she just kept singing 'Star lost' while we were in the Christmas market in the year 2023. I guess this is what I get for dragging her into so many animes and manhwas, haha. She isn't really active here, but know that she loves to murder me with pics and memes of my bias and wrecker. Truly, she lives up to her nickname.

⤐ @shetherocket - The last of my irl best friends, the poor one who isn't in the kpop fandom and has no idea wtf I am saying to her, ever. It's really funny actually, as she just nods as I speak, no clue about anything. But she likes Felix! Loves his softness and sunshine self, so I sometimes spam her with him lmao. I am never going to be sorry for that :D

⤐ @thightswideforhanin - First ever person to loudly admit Bae wrecked her, and hard. I always enjoy her reblogs, she was one of the first ever active members of my blog.

⤐ @michelle4eve - A shy follower of mine who gathered enough courage to speak to me, and would you look at that, we speak more regularly now :) She's very sweet, which is why I just call her my Sunshine.

⤐ @jinnie-ret - Jinnie-ret, Jinnie-ret, the person who started it all. She was the first skz writer who noticed me and decided to raid my blog, quite literally. She recommended my work on her blog and I got a big influx of people, making me breach the 100 followers threshold. I still can't believe she'd followed me back, when I've been her silent follower for months by that point. While we don't speak a lot, as she is busy, I know she's very welcoming and kind (also my brit mum, because she decided to adopt me lmao).

⤐ @atinyniki - Niki, my precious little pocket pookie who just loves to pester me and absolutely shower me in love, no matter how hard I keep pushing it away (this is the norm for me and my friends). She's absolutely sweet and so strong, I look up to her in that sense to this very day. We easily start gushing about ATEEZ or my husky puppies for a good while, or even start planning some gut-wrenching fics together xD I am so happy she wrote to me, even if she keeps insisting I am cute, falsely.

⤐ @writingforstraykids - Nat, my talented menace! I love her art, oh my god, I cannot wait for her to draw more, even if that is a year later or more. And her soft thoughts? Hell yes! She's the one who usually gets to see my own random thoughts about the boys (hence our collab), because she's my mootie and they get VIP services :) I am forever afraid she's gonna do what my menace does and send me pics of the boys... I would straight up die on the spot.

⤐ @cheesemonky - Leisel! While we don't talk a lot (timezone differences and my depressed, anxious self), she's cute and so supportive. I just know if we would talk more, our chat would be filled with rambles and thoughts about TXT, haha.

⤐ @yangbbokari - Mumu, the chaos child. We didn't get to know each other well yet, but she loves to say random shit and cause mayham xD Very maknae line coded.

⤐ @lilmisssona - Sona, my sweet sonata, who is so sweet and supportive of me despite barely knowing me, it gives me diabetes. I already love her works, her AUs are very interesting. She also loves my two puppies, and I am only glad to provide her with photos and videos of them.

⤐ @minholing - Jenny, my lil biologist sprout. While she left, I will await her return here. Who knows, maybe by then I'll be able to accept her hugs more easily.

⤐ @kimistorm - We don't really talk, but we occasionally tag each other in some games. Her works are really nice and sweet, I wouldn't be surprised if she is like that too.

⤐ @miuracha - Miu, the legend amongst us. I haven't really gathered the courage to talk to her yet, but I do know she is an absolute sweetheart who only deserves the best. I hope life finally gives her a break, and very soon.

⤐ @silverstarburst - Silver, my star and guardian wolf, thanks to her protective nature over her friends. Our friendship started with her tagging me in a Jisung photoset, completely unprompted. That was a sign, so true that we now regularly talk here or on discord. Bless her and her gif/photo sets.

⤐ @galaxycatdrawz - A very active moot of Nat, someone who gave me even more meme ideas when I started memeing Nat, being the menace he is. Thus, he shall be named my official meme partner. While we don't talk regularly, that doesn't mean he isn't fun to be around.

⤐ @thatonedemigodfromseoul We haven't really talked a lot so far, but that is how it is when you just meet someone.

⤐ @dean-a-mean-tae Ah, yes, sweet Ronnie, who likes to sing my praises, even though I am average at best. No, please, don't look at me like that guys, I'm sorry- We have this mouse and cat game where we compliment the other in an endless cycle. Also let me tell you, when I first saw that they mentioned me, saying how good my silly fics are, I just sat in front of my screen like a confused and emotional dumbass. Definitely will remember that day for a good while, haha. I look forward to getting to know them better, if life allows it.

If I didn't tag you here, that either means I am way too nervous to do so (you're probably a big writer blog), or I just straight up forgot with my smooth, pea-sized brain. Please do reach out to me, I assure you I didn't mean to somehow offend you.

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[evedawn165]

WANT A BETA READER?

Look no further!

Hiii!! Eve here 🫶

I'm currently looking to become a beta reader for anybody who might be interested.

I'm willing to research any fandom - currently, I am involved in anime, K-POP, Harry Potter, games and much more. You can message me with your fandom, which I'm most likely already a part of and if I'm not, I'm always happy to get into it.

I will also take your opinions and your boundaries into account. If you want full critique, I can go all in. However, if you simply want pointers or some easy commentary, I'm up for it, too.

It can be any fandom, any pairing, any length. Whether it be the rarest pair in fiction or even OC x OC.

I don't discriminate!!

I do not mind any gore, graphic content or anything of the sort. I will also accept entirely new plot lines or stories which have intricate world-building. It can also be fan-fiction about two of your colleagues or classmates; I'm still willing to beta-read.

I can comment on plot, characterisations, pacing, interactions, dialogue, world-building, descriptions and everything else in particular.

Some qualifications of mine:

> I was awarded a full-paid scholarship. I have an educational background.

> I have experience in beta reading. I have done so for fellow authors and friends.

> I, myself am a writer and have published a few pieces on many websites.

> I like to immerse myself in reading. I can try my best to give you detailed reviews and lengthy commentary, if that's what you prefer.

> I can read quite quickly. If I have enough free-time, I can finish beta-reading as much as 30k in barely a few hours.

> I'm flexible and can be patient 🫶 No rush or pressure whatsoever

P.S. I don't usually type like I'm getting graded on it 🫶 I am much more chill/energetic through text but I can keep it fully professional if you'd like

Thank you for reading my post! Feel free to drop into my chat if you need a beta-reader. Currently, I'm planning to beta-read only three people at the moment, depending on the length and details needed!

The fandoms in my tags are just the first ones I remember. I'm part of much more!

My timezone is GMT +8, if anybody's wondering

Am willing to give out other forms of media for contacting me - Instagram, TikTok, WhatsApp, Discord, etc...

- Eve

[seannesruins]

ANATOMY OF A FALLOUT

This may seem like a sympathy begging post but so be it dahil Tumblr lang naman ang outlet ko haha.

I've been wanting to watch Anatomy of a Fall since its theatrical release last year. Unfortunately, SM Cinemas screened it for a week only and I was not able to catch it then. Next I heard it was screening in Cinema 76 in Morato but the screenings were mostly on weekdays and early timeslots on weekends, both not feasible given my work schedule. That's why when I heard that FDCP is screening it in Cinematheque, I knew this was my one and only chance to catch it on the big screen before it gets into a streaming service, or something.

I asked my girlfriend, of course, because we haven't had the chance to celebrate our monthsary yet. We agreed to watch it yesterday, and agreed to meet up around 2pm because I still have work in the morning, while she wanted to sleep in late because it was her rest day.

It started off okay. I arrived first and got our tickets, she arrived a few minutes later and we went to Robinson's Place Manila for a late lunch. We went to Timezone to kill some time until the movie starts. Everything was okay until the movie ended.

It was 7:30 and she said that she's hungry so we walked around Taft Avenue to find a place to eat but she refused ALL the fast food that we passed by so we walked towards Padre Faura (From Kalaw) to go back to Robinson's. After walking around the mall, she looked at me annoyingly and said

GF: "Maglalakad na lang ba tayo? Nagugutom na ko."

Me: "Ano bang gusto mo? Kasi ikaw yung gutom diba, bakit ako ang tinatanong mo?"

GF: "Wag na kumain, umuwi na tayo."

Then she proceeded to walk to the mall exit. I followed close by. When we got to Pedro Gil, she asked what jeep to take. Mind you, I am not that familiar with public transport because I'm used to having a driver around. I told her that we have to walk back to Taft to get a jeepney bound to EDSA

GF: "Lakad na naman, wala na tayong ginawa kundi maglakad."

Me: "Mag book ka na."

GF: "Bakit kailangan sumigaw?"

My voice may have been raised, but it was because the streets were filled with people and she's giving me that attitude in the middle of all that.

Me: "Puro ka reklamo, pagod din naman ako."

Then I proceeded to walk towards Taft, with her trailing behind. We went home in silence. She ignored me from 8 in the evening. Not a single fucking word. Usually when she gives me the silent treatment, I would try to fix things, but even then she wouldn't talk to me until I am at the edge of my emotions, not until I've begged and begged and have drowned in my tears. Last night was different. I tried really hard to keep it in. I sent her a message at 1:30am.

Gustong kumain pero walang mapiling kainan dahil wala akong self awareness???

Yes, I've been cheated on and I lost a part of me in that relationship. I have posted about it here a couple of times. And to share that vulnerable side of me, only to be used against me in an argument dahil hindi ko kayang hulaan na gutom sya. Dahil sa gutom nya naging kasalanan ko pang niloko ako.

Kasalanan ko rin na ginusto kong manood ng movie. After a heated exchange of conversation, she stopped responding. And that's what triggered me the most. How can she just leave in the middle of an argument??? I went to my room and asked her to leave at 3am.

She didn't move. She said inaantok na daw sya, and that's when I lost it. Feeling ko there was something that snapped in me. Hindi ko deserve yung ganitong basura treatment. To not be heard, to not be reassured. Mas important yung gutom at antok nya sa buong relationship namin??? I started screaming until she gets up. I never have ever done that to anyone in my entire life. No one has pushed me to that limit before. But she was not done yet. She took her time packing her things while I am screaming for her to leave, even at the end, she couldn't adjust for me. She even asked me to lock the main door behind her. Have my tear strained face not evident of the emotional pain she has caused me already??? Hindi nya talaga kayang ako naman ang intindihin? That I want her gone that instant.

Ang babaw. Ang babaw but she refused to fix things before it reached this point. I am so tired emotionally. And the worst thing is that she never acknowledged her faults without arguing about it first. I never got an apology without BEGGING for it. And in her mind ako pa rin ang mali, ako pa rin ang may kasalanan. And we can only fix things if I apologize. This time I want to give myself the validation na hindi ako ang may mali.

[chipped-chimera]

WIP WEDNESDAY - 21/06/23

(I mean it’s technically Friday now between timezones and spoons but have this otherwise I’ll keep forgetting) My first WIP Wednesday! Thanks @theviridianbunny​ for the tag! I’ve been really getting stuck into modding - as well as falling into my usual mod habit of ‘start like six project at once and end up with a million WIP files' but I guess I’ll talk about the major ones.

Graphic design is my passion ...

(Long) rambling about mods I'm making + things I've learned below the cut~

My V’s tatt project is still ongoing, and I’ve (somewhat begrudgingly) been trying out Substance Painter to work on bits of it, mainly polishing seams between UV maps. It’s definitely got a lot of benefits, especially for graphic placement in really tricky areas (like anywhere in the entire head mesh region for example) but I still think a lot of the heavy work will still be done in Photoshop so I’ll probably be writing up both experiences with them when I do that tutorial I keep hinting at for complex tatt work. I’ve started drafting a tumblr tutorial but I wonder if that’s the best format, maybe a PDF? Google doc? Github wikis look cool? (tho I think I need to pay for that) - if y’all got suggestions for tutorial formats pls let me know!

As for the other arguably overly-ambitious-project-where-I-bit-off-more-than-I-could-chew ...

H A I R.

Hair has been the bane of my existence for about the past week( ... weeks? Maybe two?), most of it involving cursing, a lot of reverse-engineering game meshes and smashing my head against blender. But if not already evident from my monowire post - I am a stubborn bitch with too much time on my hands so even though there were at least two moments where I wanted to curl up on the floor under my desk and just stay there - we got there.

This all started because my favourite hair mod which I cannot split from my V’s identity was acting funky and the shape of it had been altered since a physics update. It wasn’t her anymore. So I needed new hair. I tried editing the existing hair. I tried importing the old hair mesh. I tried so many things and they didn’t work out one way or they threw a million errors or there were an obnoxious amount of verts.

I even tried looking for replacement mod hair. None of them fit, all of them felt too ‘clean’ for my V. So I just concluded: FINE. I’ll make my own damn hair. From scratch. At least then I’ll actually KNOW what’s going on with the mesh, right?

Problem with hair is tutorials are very limited in respect to Cyberpunk, so I had to learn a lot of this by myself and looking at other processes used for building game hair. I’ve had a previous stint in game design at uni but it was very introductory and more broad-strokes concepts not specific stuff like what ‘real time hair’ is and how you actually go about placing hair-cards (there’s a million different ways btw) but after another 3 days smashing my head against blender I finally got shit to work to a satisfactory level using hair tools for blender and the particle hair grooming system (not the 3.5 blender system, maybe more on that at some point).

Putting together the hair cards I was 120% convinced this was going to blow up in my face, primarily through vert count. But this hair tool plugin? Alarmingly efficient. I was frequently checking my work against Alt's hair mesh (one I was planning on rigging to) and here's the final-ish stats -

This is with only Alt's hair mesh selected (no cap) and then only my mesh(s - lots of layering to build it up), and by comparison I felt I'd built up the density of a chinchilla. This is not a brag, this is mostly genuine confusion over how efficient this plugin is, all I did was smack around hair curves. It did all the UV mapping junk on the fly.

Although structurally complete, I still consider this a WIP (yes I know there's a reeeeal fun vert funkiness in that second render, it's been fixed) since I'm having to go back and fine-tune some of the UV's the plugins mapped that I'm not happy with and generally figuring out my density problem because if anything, after putting it in-game it felt too dense.

Because yes, somehow I got it in game.

WITH. PHYSICS.

This may have driven me absolutely up the wall between having to learn blender from scratch then what the heck real time hair is and how that works etc. etc. but ... god, seeing her move back from the mirror and just feeling that instant catharsis of 'IT'S HER!' made it so. Damn. Worth it.

It looks too thick - this might be because I chucked in the 'doubled' feature Wolvenkit comes with because I hadn't spent any time doing backfaces. But it also might be because it's black? That's going to need investigating.

The physics need a lot of work too, I did a pretty rushed weight painting job last night on a merged version of the mesh because I was worried whether it was even viable and I'd already dumped an insane amount of hours into this between trying to salvage the old hair and building a new one (with some more bells and whistles. Mainly - curly). That wasn't without it's issues -

This almost fucking cracked me, given this was one of the issues I was experiencing before trying to fix an existing mesh mod. Turns out I was just being dumb and forgetting to export the armature, which I'd thought I wasn't supposed to do after having blender throw a bunch of errors on other hair attempts. I gave it a try after one last shot and boom. Worked. (I dunno what those errors were about man but now I know armature? very important).

Will I release this hair? no damn clue, depends on if I can get it to a level I feel is 'releasable'. I already know what I'm calling it though - Venatrix her side-handle I've decided on.

I look forward to adapting it into maybe a comb-back version, as well as a tied up version, so I can show off both her undercut + have the option of NOT hiding every damn tatt I've obsessed over placing on her neck haha.

In other news -

My much-needed wacom tablet replacement arrived (as well as other things I was looking forward to 👀) meaning my Wacom Cintiq, workhorse of ten years can finally enjoy her retirement. Her controls were getting funky, she had a few dead pixels but man. I'm convinced they won't make them like her ever again. Either way she's done unfortunately - upgrading my monitor to 2k made this painfully obvious. I don't think it's even running in full HD, it's that old. And with Phantom Liberty coming out this year? I'm probably going to need a new videocard and DVI compatibility isn't really a thing anymore.

So for future I think I'll just stick to the basic tablet set up, invest in screens. Also now I FINALLY know what her hair is gonna look like and with the tablet here, I can get back to work on the tattoo bodysuit.

Anyways, that's it for now! (Jesus Christ did you really read all of this? If you did you're a fucking trooper). Sorry for the extended ramble but MAN I did a lot, I needed to yell.

Till next time Chooms! Thanks again @theviridianbunny for the tag~ <3

Oh shit wait, have the blender renders before I forget because hahah I figured out how to do that too lol -

[samssims]

hey, how did you make different sections for your blog? Can't figure it out, I'd like to divide up my posts so my main page isn't messy. Thanks!

Hi Nonny! I am not entirely sure what you mean by this so I will give a bunch of general tips below. If this doesn't cover it or you want something expanded on, feel free to let me know!

Tips to keeping your blog neat & tidy!

Let me start off by saying it is your blog. Make it as messy as you want. However there are a few things you can do to make posts easier to see and read for yourself and your followers.

Tagging

Tag your posts. All of them. Have a different tag per save, story, gameplay, have one for asks, have one for reblogs. Have multiple tags! Tags galore!!! All of this will let you filter your posts to just the ones you want to see. If you tag every post with just "ts4" then you will not be able to find anything.

Example: Two of my saves have the individual tags "NSB" (for Not So Berry) and "Princess Legacy" but then I break them down even further by doing "NSB Gen 1" & "NSB Gen 2" so viewers can choose to view the project as a whole or just to search through one Gen.

Banners

This is ABSOLUTELY OPTIONAL but it makes your posts stand out from each other if you give each story/gameplay/save their own banner. It doesn't have to be extravagant. It can just be a color. Or even a pattern.

Example:

NSB

Princess Legacy:

You can absolutely steal the dimensions of these banners (aka save them right from this post) to create your own.

Use Your Queue

One of the easiest ways to organize your blog is to organize your queue! If you have a lot of stories or posts, try to limit when/what days you are posting them so it looks more consistent on your blog.

Example: In a perfect world where I have consistent content this is also referenced in my timezone which is PST: NSB posts go up at 6 AM every WEEKDAY - I manually schedule these Gameplay posts (whatever gameplay I am currently into as this changes) 3 times a day on the hour every weekday 11 AM-1PM - this is my normal queue set up Reblogs of others post - Weekends, 3 times a day as my normal queue is set up for

When I was doing really well with content, I would queue up 15 posts of gameplay (3 posts a day for 5 days) then go into the sims tag and throw 6 reblogged posts into my queue. Then start over again so I could queue up months in advance.

Using this method for myself makes my blog feels more structured to me. It's just for my own peace of mind and keeps me more organized.

Blog Themes

One of the best creative flex this site offers you imo. You can customize your blog theme to make it fit what you want.

There are a TON of blog themes over theme-hunter. This must be done from desktop and is only for desktop. It cannot be changed via mobile. If you check out theme-hunter, go to the top right "MORE" button. If you are looking for a main page theme, search through the "All-In-One" tag. If you are looking for a story page like i have to showcase all your stories together, I usually look through the "Family/Favorites/Characters" tag.

Now this does require a very BASE knowledge of coding, which I cannot get into in this post. It's a bit of work. Start with a simple theme until you get it down.

PRO TIP: Make a private side blog for just yourself where you can test out the themes. That way if you break the code it doesn't break your main blog. Once the code is ready on your private blog, then you can just copy/paste it onto your main!

HERE is a quick guide on how to add a tumblr theme. If you have never done it before, it's a bit of a learning curve, but honestly it's sooo satisfying once it's done.

Example: The codes for the current pages I am using can be found below: Main Theme: [X] Story Page [X]

Customizing Your Blog

Putting this all together!

Your new story pages and blog pages can include links to the specific tags you are using on your posts! It's how others can find you content so it's organized!

So let's look at this tab on my blog:

This is part of my blog theme. I change it out to update whatever my blog is currently showcasing! It's part of the custom page and me going into the code to manually change it.

If you were to click any of the "Start" tabs (for the ones that have them) they would take you to the URL for the tag itself:

samssims.tumblr.com/tagged/nsb+gen+1/chrono [tumblr url] / [the word TAGGED to show you are searching the tag] / [the tag itself with + signs for spaces] / [the word CHRONO just means it will start at the beginning of the tag, useful for stories]

NOTE: These URLs only work on desktop/mobile browser. They do not work on the tumblr app.

Conclusion

And that's just a little bit about organizing your blog. But honestly it's your space. Just like your room IRL, you keep it the way you like it! This system works for me! If it helps you find your flow then I am happy to help!

[ewanmitchellcrumbs]

The fandom is hugely competitive. To be noticed you have to up the ante. The stats for my fics suffer if I don't. If I see a mutual has posted at the same time as me, I cut myself or deny my body food/water for being a failure. That's what ups my game. Punishment versus reward. You have to be quick on the draw. People compare your work against what was previously posted above you on the dash in the tag as they browse. That's why I check the tag constantly to see when people are posting so I can stand out. If there is a quiet gap and my mutuals aren't active, I then hit my mark and post. That's when I get more notes.

I am trying to work out my mutuals timezones so I can set my alarm clock at different times to wake up and post. I schedule posts but Tumblr fucks up and I miss my window of opportunity. So I need to to it manually. I have also started a spreadsheet outlining who is my main competition. This has been quite hard though as new writers are appearing all the time and I have to keep checking their posts, measuring the note count and scoring off their own reblogs because they are invalid. I'm focusing on how many new reblogs/likes/comments are occurring within a certain timeframe.

When I have time, I will be making a concentrated effort to break into the Wattpad and AO3 market. There is a huge amount of content being churned out constantly that is going to be challenging to find my niche in. I aim to study what is the post popular pairings, style, tags and plots as a starting point, even it means deviating from my usual content. Sometimes sacrifices have to be made.

I have an audience to maintain. People like you don't understand the responsibility. Art is pain and suffering. It will be worth it in the end.

This is the unfunniest troll I have ever seen. Joking about self harm and disordered eating is disgusting and you are incredibly sick for doing so. Get some help and keep away from my asks.

[justanapplenothinghere]

read please.(Reblogs would be appreciated to send the message across)

Hello guys I usually try to keep my posts light and fun but.. I was planning on posting this after 4 weeks but I feel the urge to having to post this now.I will explain why..[TW EMOTIONAL ABUSE AND PHYSICAL ABUSE.]

Please do not read forward if theses trigger you scroll past my two paragraphs and there I will be talking just about my commissions.

I am currently staying with a family member who I will not name who. But I have been emotionally abused for the couple of days to the point that I feel like absolute shit. My mental health was shit before but I was getting better before the 4 weeks.They refuse to use my pronouns despite me asking and explaining the purpose behind them. Instead they laughed it off and made a joke of "Oh if you're this, why do you wear this then?"

Yesterday, I have experienced abuse. Yes physical abuse.I experienced abuse before when I was younger but then I had to move to get a better education for my benefit .My legs, arm are currently although tiny in size but many brusies are there now.My left arm has a bruise on the side of it that forces me to feel pain whenever I place it down or just slightly touch it.As I am typing this, I am typing this with the right arm.However also I barely have been getting any sleep because of my younger brother due to him screaming at night and crying.(which is understandable he is only small and doesn't know any better.) May I also add that this year is my last year at school and that I will be finishing school. I am doing better now a bit, I took paracetamol to ease the pain on my hand. It's just there is a lot I'm dealing with currently.

Now about the commissions and whether you read it all or not, I will just put this in a nutshell.I just want to make a bit of profit just to have in case as I leave school. If anything happens as well as buying certain things.It would mean a lot to me of any of you even considered looking into it. Now some notes I wanna make about this..

I know it says that the art work will be finished between 3-5 working days but considering right that my hand is bruised I'm going to slightly put the days up and say it's 4-6 days depending on whatever you order.

I will be posting the rough draft to you just so you know that you are not getting scammed by me or feel like you are getting scammed at all.

If there is something you don't like about the rough draft and have a certain thing in mind ask away and I will try my best to answer you.

My timezone is different so I am sorry if you text me and I do not respond back. I will try to get back to you as soon as possible.

I will be accepting 4 commissions at a time before the next batch of 4 are allowed.

Know that I will also make a completely separate post later that just has the commission information again and I will pin that to the blog.

Thank you for reading and taking your time to read this.

[rp-partnerfinder]

another search

Hello!

I tend to go by Rabid online. I’m going to keep this short and sweet because the majority of my info is written out on my carrd.

[ https://skelehim.carrd.co/ ]

The TL;DR is that I’m a 30 year old married trans man trying to pick up another couple writing partners. I prefer slice of life style things, but slices of really weird lives. I don’t care about the gender of my writing partner, but I do require them to be grown, legal adults (18+).

I am currently only looking for m/m pairings. I reply a minimum of once a day, usually 2-3+ unless work is crazy. I usually post somewhere between 300 and 1,500 words per post. I’m in EST and usually active 9am - 9pmish and would appreciate if folks who reached out were in similar timezones.

I honestly only even made a tumblr account in order to expand my search, so I admittedly may not think to check likes/DMs. Feel free to just reach out to me on Discord (skelehim)

[thecorporatehotline]

doing my best

i have no idea how tumblr works in 2024

Hello!

I tend to go by Rabid online. I'm going to keep this short and sweet because the majority of my info is written out on my carrd.

[ https://skelehim.carrd.co/ ]

The TL;DR is that I'm a 30 year old married trans man trying to pick up another couple writing partners. I prefer slice of life style things, but slices of really weird lives. I don't care about the gender of my writing partner, but I do require them to be grown, legal adults (18+).

I am currently only looking for m/m pairings. I reply a minimum of once a day, usually 2-3+ unless work is crazy. I usually post somewhere between 300 and 1,500 words per post. I'm in EST and usually active 9am - 9pmish and would appreciate if folks who reached out were in similar timezones.

I honestly only even made a tumblr account in order to expand my search, so I admittedly may not think to check likes/DMs. Feel free to just reach out to me on Discord (skelehim)

[iobartach]

guidelines

hello there! 👋

Mun is 30+ years old / irish / GMT+0 timezone; call me nix! I track the #iobartach tag

i work a full-time job, soooo real life will take priority over tumblr'ing at all times. hence, it will mean that thread replies will be slow. like, a few weeks slow, so sorry in advance about that!

this blog will feature my own take on miguel o'hara, and is inspired by both the across the spider-verse film and the 2099 comics! i also draw influence from the usual scifi / dystopian things; bladerunner, cyberpunk 2076, altered carbon to name a few, so if there's anything you'd like to know or clarify, feel free to reach out!

i would also like it to be known that my version of miguel is not here to be either an instant ship or a punching bag. i understand the appeal and the temptation, and that, particularly in the across the spider-verse movie, he's coded as the antagonist, but please don't assume he's here for automatic smut, or to be hated on or humiliated by your characters! thank you!

mun has no triggers; is open to rping just about anything but smut!

shipping? ehhhhhhhh we’ll seeee :’) i'm kinda the type to ease into that stuff, if at all. friendships tho? enemies? 👀 sign me uppp for such plots!

not mutually exclusive! And aye, i'm all for following and interacting with other miguels out there!

given the nature of this muse (read; freaky half-spider lad), themes of body horror and experimentation will crop up from time to time, but i try my best to put such darker stuff under read mores & attach 'tw'/trigger tags on it

i absolutely adore crossovers of all types! i would be delighted to throw miguel at you!

will rp with canons & oc’s!

asks! memes! the whole lot! i absolutely adore writing up things based on them! most of the time i tend to answer asks in their own posts, as i make the assumption that folks may want to continue them in a thread, so feel free to reblog anything i've answered that i've tagged you in, if you'd like to keep on going!

same goes for sending in memes; absolutely feel free to browse through my meme prompts tag and send in anything you like! the memes i reblog don't have 'expiry' times, so if you see some prompt you are tempted to use, go for it!

and ditto if you would ever like to randomly interact; i loooove receiving just random asks with a bit of context to them <3

where possible ... pleeeease reblog memes and art / musings / etc posts from the source? it's beginning to get rather frustrating when i see people i haven't even said two words to yet just yoink a post off me 😅

lastly, i get it that sometimes things just don't work out between muns and muses, and that's okay!!! life happens! i'm completely fine with it, won't even hold it against ya. but, if at all possible, can i invite you to approach me with why you're blocking me first, instead of just doing it out of the blue? i'm aware there can be valid reasons, but i am here and willing to listen. cheers :')

and if you're in the business of repeatedly softblocking, feel free to just block me instead. i won't make a habit of chasing after folks like that, or have my time be wasted, without any explanation(s) provided. thank you. 👍

We're here for a good time Not a long time (not a long time) So have a good time The sun can't shine every day