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kookooluvr · 3 months ago

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Teach Me How To Love - Part 6.5

jeon jungkook, a fellow professor at yonsei university, is your friend, co-worker, and secret bed buddy. you have rules set in place to make sure there are no misunderstandings in your little arrangement. the #1 rule is as clear as day; no catching feelings. simple, right? wrong. let's see how un-simple it gets when a certain economics professor falls for an emotionally unavailable political science professor.

pairing: professor!jungkook x (fem) professor!reader, fwb to lovers

genre: fluff, angst, smut, fwb au, economicsprofessor!jungkook, politicalscienceprofessor!reader, slow burn, some emotional constipation, some sappy moments, lots of sexy moments.

rating: 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

w/c: 5k

warnings: sunghoon, sunghoon and more sunghoon !!! teenage oc meeting her first love, lots of new warm, fuzzy feelings, cheating 😤😤😤 sunghoon is honestly just a piece of garbage, enter oc's knight in shining armour: my sweet, precious angel baby jk at the end 🥹

a/n: hey cuties !!! 6.5 is just a little flashback to show some snippets of oc's relationship with sunghoon. nothing we don't already know, just some backstory. i'm sorry for taking so long to post this one but i promise part 7 will be out as soon as possible 🫶🏼

taglist: @rpwprpwprpwprw @livinluvl @puppybunnyjkay @mimi1097 @bumblebee-21s-blog @koosluvss @sou-17 @svnbangtansworld @junecat18 @shrek-the-destroyer @tastykookoonut @sturniolowrld @palomanazareth @chimmisbae @daskewl @ramyun-h @heyitsroshni @matryoshka-poetry @almatiarau @gukkie7 @ambiee3 @blueberriesm @milkk1400 @yuriouki @lovelovethebeatles @somehowukook @deedeeps @emily-hung @jkaxl @bhonbhon @bearchermer @annafarrr @in-out-inbetween @mar-lo-pap @123xxx0o

find tmhtl masterlist here

find tmhtl playlist here

At the ripe age of sixteen, you're not the kind of girl who goes to parties. Your parents are strict and you're responsible. The kind of responsible that means curfews are followed, grades are prioritized and lying to your parents is an absolute no-go. Until tonight.

"You need to relax," Jihyo mutters as the two of you squeeze through the house's front door. The party is already in full swing. Music blares from the speakers, bodies are pressed together in a mass of sweaty teenagers, and the scent of cheap beer and cologne lingers in the air.

"I am relaxed," you grumble back, even as you pull your sleeves down over your hands, suddenly feeling out of place and self-conscious in big square glasses and dirty Converse.

Jihyo snorts. "Yeah, and I'm the queen of England." You huff, rolling your eyes. "We shouldn't even be here."

"Correction; you shouldn't be here. I, on the other hand, am thriving." Jihyo grins, already scanning the room for familiar faces. "Oh! I think I see Haeun! I'm gonna go say hi. I'll be right back, okay?"

You watch as she disappears into the crowd before letting out a sigh and making your way toward the kitchen instead. If you're going to be here, you at least need something to keep you occupied, preferably a soda. The idea of drinking alcohol at a party where you know almost no one is far too terrifying to risk.

You squeeze past a group of people and reach for a can of Coke from a cooler box filled with ice and drinks in the middle of the kitchen. You crack it open and take a sip. You take a few sips before realizing how awkward you must look, so you get your phone out and pull the only move you can think of; pretend to text someone and check the weather app every few seconds.

"You don't look like you want to be here."

The voice is smooth, casual and dangerously close. You freeze and tilt your head to find a boy standing before you, leaning against the counter with the kind of confidence that makes girls' knees weak.

Park Sunghoon.

You know who he is before he even introduces himself. All the girls here know Sunghoon. He's a senior and quite popular apparently. He's the kind of guy who always has someone's attention on him, the kind of guy who never has to try too hard because everything seems to come naturally to him.

And right now, he's looking at you. You of all people.

You grip your can of Coke a little bit tighter. "I'm fine," you mutter just a tad bit too quickly, realizing that you sound far from fine.

Sunghoon tilts his head, not trying to hide his amusement. "Uh-huh."

You shift under his gaze, suddenly feeling small. "I'm just here with my friend."

"Jihyo, right?"

You blink, surprised. "You know Jihyo?"

He chuckles. "Yeah. I'm friends with her cousin."

You nod, feeling a bit unsure of what to say next. He studies you for a moment before speaking up again. "You don't come to parties often, huh?"

You hesitate, mentally kicking yourself for making it so obvious. "Not really, no."

"Do your parents know you're here?" He chuckles, sounding almost like he's mocking you.

Your face burns hot, your eyes drifting down to your sneakers. "Of course they do."

"Liar," he whispers.

You swallow thickly, feeling your pulse jump in your throat.

Sunghoon grins, his eyes softening at the evident nerves in your body language. "Don't worry, I won't tell," he teases, taking a sip of his beer.

You stare up at him, wondering why he would possibly choose to stand here and talk to you when there are so many other girls. He's smooth, too smooth, too effortlessly charming. It's dangerous, yet you can't help but welcome the butterflies in your stomach every time he looks at you.

"Come on," he says suddenly, reaching past you for a big bag of chips on the counter, his arm brushing against yours in the process. "If you're not gonna talk, at least eat something."

You blink up at him. "What?"

Sunghoon tears the bag open and holds it out for you. "Chips," he deadpans. "I know you've been standing here trying to look busy. Eating is the easiest way to do that."

Your mouth opens and closes as you try to deny it, but you know he's not wrong. Reluctantly, you reach into the bag, plucking out a single chip. "This is stupid."

He grins, popping two into his mouth at once. "Maybe. But it's better than awkwardly pretending to text someone who isn't texting you back."

That almost makes you choke on your chip. "Excuse me?"

His eyes twinkle with amusement, his grin growing wider. "I saw you earlier. Very convincing performance, by the way."

"You're insufferable," you mutter, glaring at him before shoving another chip into your mouth.

"But I'm right," he chuckles.

You hate that you can't think of a comeback. You hate that the look in his eyes makes your heart pound. You hate that you don't mind spending the rest of the night speaking to him.

It happens on a random Thursday, the kind of day that usually comes and goes without any significance.

You're sitting cross-legged on his bed, flipping through one of your textbooks while he's sprawled out beside you, absentmindedly tossing a baseball into the air and catching it.

It's been a while since you officially started dating, and even though you're still getting used to being someone's girlfriend, it's been fun and easy.

The window is cracked open, letting in the crisp autumn air. The faint sound of distant traffic hums in the background, mixing with the rhythmic thump of Sunghoon's baseball hitting his palm. You underline a passage in your notes, trying to focus on studying, but your boyfriend's movements are distracting.

"Do you ever take university seriously?" You sigh, not looking up from your notes.

He snorts. "I'm a third-year, baby. I've earned the right to slack off sometimes."

You roll your eyes, highlighting another sentence. "Yeah, must be nice, hm?"

He hums, catching the baseball one last time before tossing it into the drawer of his nightstand. He shifts, turning onto his side so he can watch you study.

You try to ignore the weight of his gaze. It's impossible.

"You know," he muses, reaching out to toy with the hem of your sweatshirt, the one he gave you, slightly oversized on you, the sleeves bunched at your wrists. "I think you secretly like spending all your time studying just so you don't have to pay attention to me."

You scoff, flipping a page. "You're delusional."

Sunghoon smirks, tugging lightly on the fabric of the sweatshirt. "Seriously. I could be dying over here, in desperate need of love and affection, and you'd still choose your stupid textbook over me."

You raise an eyebrow. "I think you'll live."

He sighs dramatically. "I guess I'll survive."

You shake your head, unable to stop the smile tugging at your lips. "You're such a baby."

"You're so mean to me. You're lucky I love you."

Your breath catches. You look up, startled, and that's when you see it, his expression shifting, his playful smirk faltering like he just realized what he said.

He blinks at you, his confidence wavering for the first time since you started dating. "Uh..."

You stare at him, your heart pounding.

Sunghoon lets out a nervous chuckle, shaking his head like he messed it up. "Shit, that wasn't how I meant to say that for the first time."

You're still frozen, slowly processing his words, watching as he hurries to sit up, looking restless all of a sudden.

"I was gonna wait," he murmurs, looking disappointed with myself. "Make it special. Maybe plan a big date or something." He looks at you, his face suddenly serious, his eyes searching your expression. "But...I don't know. I was looking at you just now and it just...it just slipped out. But I mean it."

Your lips part, but no words come out.

A flicker of uncertainty crosses his face. He exhales sharply, visibly pulling back. "Shit. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything."

That snaps you out of it. "No."

"No?"

You shake your head quickly, setting your textbook aside. "No, don't take it back."

His eyebrows furrow. "But-"

You reach for his hand, intertwining your fingers with his, your grip firm. "I love you too."

The tension in his shoulders disappears immediately. His eyes widen slightly, like he wasn't expecting you to actually say it back.

"Yeah?" he murmurs softly, squeezing your hand with a wide smile on his lips.

You nod, feeling an intense warmth start to bloom in your chest. "Yeah."

He lets out a soft, breathy laugh, cupping your face in his hands. "I love you," he whispers, his voice full of something so warm, so certain, that it makes your chest ache.

And when he kisses you, soft and slow, you think, 'This is it. This is forever.'

You never thought moving in with your boyfriend would be easy, but standing in the middle of Sunghoon's apartment, surrounded by boxes labelled in messy handwriting, you realize you underestimated just how chaotic it would be.

"You own way too much stuff," he grunts, setting down the last of your boxes by the couch. He wipes his brow, glancing around the room like he's just now realizing how much space your things take up.

You place your hands on your hips, raising an eyebrow at his tone. "Excuse me? I only brought the essentials."

Sunghoon snorts, lightly kicking one of the boxes with his foot. "Unless you consider twenty scented candles an essential, I think you're lying."

"I like my apartment to smell good, thank you very much," you scoff, crossing your arms over your chest.

He grins, stepping closer. "Our apartment," he corrects you, playfully tapping your chin.

Right. Our apartment. That's crazy. It's not just his apartment anymore, it's yours too now.

Sunghoon studies you for a moment, his expression softening. "You okay?"

"Yeah, just...taking it all in, y'know?"

He smiles, reaching for your hand to lace his fingers with yours. "Come on, let's unpack later. First, I think we need to do something important."

"Like what?" you ask, tilting your head.

He grins and starts tugging you towards the kitchen. "Finding a space for all your mugs."

By the time you finally finish unpacking, mostly unpacking, it's late and you're exhausted.

Sunghoon stretches his arms above his head while he walks to the bedroom, letting out a big yawn. "Okay, I vote we officially stop being productive for the night."

You groan in agreement, flopping onto the bed. It smells like his detergent mixed with his cologne. It's so distinctly him and you love it.

Sunghoon chuckles and plops down beside you, rolling onto his side to look at you. "This feels kinda surreal, doesn't it? Like, you actually live here now. I can't kick you out when I get sick of your yapping."

That earns him a pinch to the bicep.

"Regretting it already?" you scoff.

"Are you kidding? I've been begging you to move in for months," he grins, scooting closer.

You giggle as he nudges your nose with his. "You're ridiculous."

He smiles, genuinely smiles, before propping himself up on his elbow, his face turning serious. "This is just the beginning, y'know."

You furrow your eyebrows in confusion. "Beginning of what?"

"Of our life together," he smiles, cupping your cheek in his hand. "I'm eventually gonna make you my wife and have you barefoot and pregnant in no time."

That earns him another pinch.

You smooth down the skirt of your dress for what feels like the tenth time, glancing around the restaurant with wide eyes. It's the nicest place you've ever been to. Marble floors, candlelit tables, waiters in black vests who speak softly and pour your water with practiced precision. Even the chandelier above you sparkles like it's been polished specifically for tonight.

"You didn't have to go this all out," you murmur, glancing at Sunghoon from across the table.

He leans back in his chair, looking far too relaxed in his tailored suit, his hair styled perfectly, a glass of red wine cradled in his hand. "Come on," he scoffs with a soft grin. "You're always saying I don't take you anywhere fancy."

You let out an amused snort, your eyebrows raised. "I meant, like...movie theatres with reclining seats. Not this."

He smirks, taking a sip of his wine before setting it down on the white linen tablecloth. "This is better though."

You look around the restaurant, your eyes wide. "This place probably costs more than our rent."

"You should be proud, ___. I'm interning at one of the top law firms in Seoul. We might as well live like it," he scoffs.

You smile but something in your chest twists. You've noticed the change in him lately, how he carries himself differently, speaks more carefully, drops names you're unfamiliar with. There's a polish to him now, like he's already halfway to the man he's trying to become, and you don't know if you're even worthy of that man.

"I am proud of you, baby," you mumble, trying to lighten the mood. "This just...must have cost a fortune. You know I would've been happy with takeout and a movie for date night."

"I know." Sunghoon leans forward, taking your hand in his. "But I wanted tonight to be more special than that."

Your eyebrows furrow. "Why?"

He doesn't answer right away. Instead, he reaches into the inside pocket of his suit jacket. He pulls out a small black velvet box and places it on the table, unopened.

Your eyes almost bulge out of your head, your heart pounding, your mouth suddenly feeling incredibly dry. You can't speak, staring at him like a deer caught in headlights.

"Look, I know we're young," he murmurs, looking a little nervous. "And we still have so much ahead of us...but I also know I don't want to go through any of it without you."

Your breath hitches.

"I've known for a long time that I want to marry you, ___."

He opens the velvet box. Inside is a diamond ring, big but classy. It's classic and simple, and it looks expensive enough to make your heart race and your head spin. Sunghoon stands up from his chair and moves toward you, dropping to one knee beside the table. The whole restaurant feels like it fades to a low hum.

"___," he murmurs, his eyes shining, his voice steady. "Will you marry me?"

Your eyes grow glossy. You've talked about the future, always in vague, hopeful ways. You've talked about maybe moving to a new city someday, maybe getting a dog, maybe getting married and having a baby.

But this is suddenly so real.

He looks so sure, so ready. When you look at him, you don't just see a boyfriend anymore. You see someone successful, someone who wants to be with you forever, someone who could give you a life that looks like this.

You say yes.

Because you believe it's right.

Because you love him, and you want to love him forever.

You're balancing a bag of groceries in one hand and your keys and purse in the other when you unlock the door to the apartment.

It's later than usual, but not by much. You told him you'd be studying late at the library but you finished early and decided to surprise him with a nice dinner, something warm and comforting to break through the tension that's been sitting between you both for weeks now.

Grad school has been intense. Between classes, research, your thesis work, and the never-ending string of appointments for wedding planning, you've barely had time to breathe, let alone focus on the growing distance between you and Sunghoon.

But tonight, you want to try. You want to remind him that you still choose him, even when life is chaotic.

You're toeing off your shoes when you hear it. A soft, breathy sound. Muffled. Familiar.

Your stomach knots. You take a few tentative steps down the hallway. The bedroom door is slightly ajar.

Then—

A moan. A voice you recognize. Too well. You freeze. Your heart drops.

No. No. No. No.

You push the door open and there they are.

Sunghoon and Minji, one of your old university friends. She's straddling him, his hands gripping her waist, both of them frozen in horror the second they see you.

The grocery bag slips from your hand, apples and a carton of milk crashing to the floor.

Minji scrambles off of him, trying to cover herself. "___, I...I didn't know you were-"

"Get out," you whisper.

She hesitates, glancing at Sunghoon like she expects him to fix it.

"I said get out!"

Minji jumps, grabbing her clothes and bolting from the room. You're left standing there with shallow breaths, hands shaking, staring at the man you're supposed to marry.

Sunghoon stares back at you, sheet around his waist, mouth opening like he wants to say something but nothing comes out.

His lips part. Then close. Then part again. All you can hear is the ringing in your ears. The room spins. Your stomach churns. You feel like you might be sick.

Suddenly, you turn and walk straight into the bathroom, slamming the door behind you and locking it. You barely make it to the sink before the sob rips out of your chest. Your hands clutch the porcelain as you struggle to stay upright, the weight of what you've just seen, what you know, crashing over you all at once.

The betrayal feels like fire, burning through your ribs, crawling up your throat, threatening to swallow you whole. Your mind keeps playing it on a loop. His hands on her. Her voice. His face when he saw you.

You drop to the floor, pulling your knees to your chest. Your breath comes in short, shallow gasps, tears streaming down your cheeks with no sign of stopping. You cover your mouth with both hands, trying to muffle the sounds clawing their way out of you.

This was supposed to be the man you were going to marry. The one who promised forever. The one you trusted. And he threw all of it away.

Minutes pass. Maybe hours. You don't know. You sit on the cold tile floor, hugging your knees to your chest, your eyes red and puffy, your entire body wracked with silent, aching grief. Eventually, your sobs quiet into nothing. You don’t feel better. Just empty.

Numb.

When you finally unlock the door and step back into the apartment, the silence greets you like a slap.

You walk out slowly, your legs stiff and heavy beneath you. You find him sitting on the couch, fully dressed now, hunched over with his elbows on his knees, head in his hands. He looks up when he hears your footsteps, eyes red, hair a mess, guilt hanging from him like a second skin.

"___," he mutters softly, like he doesn't know how to say anything else.

The pain bubbles up again, but this time it's sharper, steadier. You cross your arms, standing a few feet away like you can't bring yourself to get any closer.

You stare at him, feeling completely hollow. "How could you?"

He rises from the couch, cautiously stepping toward you. "I wasn't thinking. I- there's no excuse. I fucked up. Please, please, let's just talk about this-"

"Talk about what?" you snap, fresh tears building again. "How you cheated on me? How you fucked her in our bed? Fine, let's talk about it."

Sunghoon runs his hands through his hair, pacing desperately. "I know...I know I messed up. I never meant to hurt you."

"You never meant to-" You laugh bitterly, shaking your head. "Sunghoon, you fucked someone, my friend of all people! In our bed! You fucked everything up!"

He stops pacing, jaw tightening, expression darkening like he's been holding in frustration and resentment and he just can't hold it in any longer.

"Maybe everything was already fucked up, ___."

"What are you-"

"I felt alone, okay?" he groans, rubbing his hands over his face. "You were never around."

Your brows knit together. "Are you fucking serious?"

"I needed to feel like I mattered again!" he snaps. "You never made time for me!"

You shake your head, completely stunned. "I was working my ass off to build a name for myself, a life for us. I was doing it all...for us, Sunghoon!"

His expression contorts, bitter and broken. "Every time I looked at you, you were buried in your books or talking about centrepieces or venue options. You never stopped. Your degree, the damn wedding planning, it all mattered more than me and my needs!"

You laugh, cold and hollow. "Don't you dare stand there and act like the victim. You cheated on me. For God knows how long."

"I know I did," he mutters, but the guilt starts fading from his voice, replaced with something harder. "But you weren't giving me what I needed. I needed someone who actually made me feel like a man."

Your heart twists, a mix of pain and rage clawing its way through your chest. "So, this made you feel like a man? Is that it? You needed to fuck someone else, someone I considered a friend, so that you could feel like more of a man? You couldn't talk to me and try to fix it?"

He exhales, turning away from you. "I tried."

"No," you mutter shakily, your voice breaking. "You didn't try hard enough."

You stare at the man you thought you'd spend forever with, and he doesn't look like the boy who you fell in love with. The boy who promised to never hurt you. He just looks like a stranger now.

"I was loyal to you," you scoff, tears blurring your vision. "Even when it was hard. Even when I was exhausted. I chose you every single day, even when you made it so hard to. Even when you lost your temper, even when you would scream at me, even when you made me feel bad about myself. I still chose you, Sunghoon!"

Your voice turns into a sob, your cheeks stained with mascara, your bottom lip trembling.

"Why couldn't you choose me? Why couldn't you think of our future?"

"It stopped feeling like ours a long time ago," he mutters, his voice growing softer. He looks away, looking ashamed for a fleeting second before he doubles down. "You did this to us."

The silence that follows is deafening.

You stare at him in complete and utter disbelief. You almost laugh, almost, but it sticks in your throat, tangled in heartbreak and disbelief.

"I did this?" you echo.

Sunghoon's expression is tight. "I'm not saying I was right, but I felt alone. I felt like I didn't matter to you anymore," he mumbles, looking down at his feet.

Tears slide down your cheeks, hot and silent. "You were everything to me."

He looks at you, regret starting to crack through his pride. "Baby..."

Your mouth parts, but the words catch in your throat. You want to scream and break something. You want to rewind time, go back to just an hour ago when you were standing in the grocery store aisle debating whether to buy basil or parsley for the dinner you never got to make.

He takes a step toward you but you shake your head, backing away. "I can't believe you'd do this. After seven fucking years. I really hope she was worth it."

His eyes glisten but it's too late. The damage is done. And just like that, you know there's no coming back from this. No amount of apologies or explanation can undo what he did. So you turn around, walk to the bedroom, and start packing a bag. You walk over to the nightstand, the one where your wedding planner notebook still sits, pages dog-eared and scribbled with half-finished ideas.

You slip your ring off without hesitation. It's heavier than you remember. You place it down on the wood with a soft clink that sounds louder than the city traffic outside. It's final, inevitable.

Without looking back, you turn and walk out.

The guest bedroom in Jihyo's apartment smells faintly like lavender and fabric softener, but after almost two years, it no longer feels temporary. Her place is bright, filled with colour, yet you feel like a shadow haunting it.

You wake up slowly, sunlight filtering through pale curtains, but it doesn't fill you with warmth. Some days are harder than others. There are still days you lie in bed and stare at the ceiling until your chest aches. Days when food tastes like cardboard, when your body feels too heavy to carry, when the memories creep in—him, his laugh, his scent. Jihyo's been your main support system. There are still days when she has to physically drag you int the shower or sit beside you with a spoon to your lips to force you to eat something.

This morning feels better, even just slightly.

You pull yourself out of bed and walk to the kitchen where Jihyo is already buzzing around, dressed and ready for the day. Her presence, as always, is a source of comfort.

"Big day!" she exclaims, pushing a fresh cup of coffee into your hands.

You take it with a grateful smile. "You mean terrifying day."

She gives you a look. "You'll be great. Just don't cry in front of the students. They're probably still hungover from the weekend and dealing with their own shit."

"That's...fair," you snort.

Jihyo tilts her head, her voice growing gentler. "You sure you're okay to do this?"

You nod, looking determined. "I have to be."

You have to be ready. You transferred to Yonsei for a fresh start. You have a new job, apartment hunting, maybe thinking of getting a cat to keep you company. There are no more wedding plans taped to the fridge or a ring on your finger. It's scary, but you're ready. You have no other choice but to be ready.

Standing in front of the main entrance to the building, clutching a leather folder to your chest like it's the glue holding you together, you take a deep breath to try and ease the flutter of nerves in your stomach.

When you walk in, the hallway is filled with a soft hum of conversation in the distance, the low shuffle of students moving from class to class. You're so caught up in the quiet rhythm of it all that you nearly run into someone rounding the corner.

"Oh- sorry!"

You step back quickly, your folder nearly slipping from your grasp. The man in front of you blinks, just as startled.

He's tall, dressed in slacks and a pale blue dress shirt rolled up to the elbows. His hair looks soft, a little tousled like he's been running his hands through it all morning. His glasses sit on the bridge of his nose and his eyes, round and kind, widen slightly when they land on you.

He's handsome in that kind, unassuming, doesn't-know-he's-hot way.

"No, no, I'm sorry," he rushes to say, bowing politely. "I didn't see you there."

You shake your head, offering him a faint smile. "It's okay, I wasn't really watching where I was going."

The awkward tension only lasts a second before he smiles, gentle and warm.

"Are you new? I haven't seen you around here before."

You nod. "Yeah. First day."

He nods in understanding, adjusting his glasses before offering his hand. "I'm Jungkook. Professor Jeon to my students. I teach economics."

You shake his hand. His grip is firm but not overpowering. His palm is warm, comforting.

"I'm ___. Professor ___ to mine," you murmur. "Political science."

"Welcome to Yonsei," he smiles, his eyes crinkling at the sides. "We don't usually do hazing rituals for new staff, unless you count being thrown into an 8am lecture with uninterested students."

His smile makes something flutter in your chest. It's not romantic per say, you're not ready for that, but there's something safe about him. Something reassuring, like the soft hum of music you didn't know you needed to hear.

"Thanks," you murmur, shifting the folder in your hands. "Still trying not to get lost."

He grins. "I still get lost, and I've been here a while."

You laugh, the sound catching you off guard. It's been a long time since you've done that.

You look at him, taking in his slightly crooked tie, the way his glasses slip down his nose when he glances at your schedule peeking out from your folder. He kinda reminds you of a puppy.

He clears his throat. "If you need anything, uh...printer passwords, coffee recommendations, a tour of the faculty lounge, I'm happy to help."

Your lips twitch. "Is that all a part of your job description?"

He chuckles. "It is when the new political science professor looks slightly terrified."

You roll your eyes, but you can't keep the smile from tugging at your mouth. "Not terrified. Just...mildly overwhelmed."

"Mildly," he repeats, nodding like it's very serious business. "Got it. In that case, I'll keep my offer for coffee on the table."

You laugh again, softer this time. "I might take you up on that."

"Good." He pauses, then gestures towards the hallway. "You headed to class?"

"Yeah, but I'm not really sure where I'm supposed to be," you murmur sheepishly.

His eyebrows raise, the corners of his mouth turning upward. "I can walk you to wherever you need to be...if you want."

You hesitate, but only for a second.

"Sure."

As the two of you start walking side by side, something loosens in your chest, ever so slightly—the knot that's been there since the breakup with Sunghoon.

You're not ready for anything big. You're still healing. Still learning to exist in your own skin again, but for the first time in a really long time, something flickers quietly in the back of your mind. Maybe, not today or tomorrow, but someday something good can start again.

And maybe it starts with a boy in glasses and a crooked tie, holding open the door to your new life.

< Part 6 || Part 7 >

#jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jungkook fluff #jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook x reader #jungkook imagines #jungkook scenarios #bts x reader #bts fluff #bts angst #bts smut #jungkook series #bts series #bts jungkook #fic: tmhtl #kookooluvr

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jikooklove9795 · 2 months ago

Note

did you notice that when jm posted the birthday picture of him and jk shirtless for jks brithday, he got a lot of hate, right? but did you see that almost immediately after, we got so many videos, pictures, tiktok’s, ays with jk shitless? it feel like when he posted the tiktok, the back photo at the gym, like he was ending that shit real quick. all the hate jm got for posting it “without jks permission” as the trash called it and the jk did the same on his own??? call me delulu but i loved how it felt like he defended jm without even saying anything.

Hi anon 😊

I'm really sorry for the delayed response. I just recently started catching up on old asks and saw yours.

Now coming to your ask, you're not being delusional at all. I see it the same way too. Jungkook was totally defending Jimin there.

Let's take a look at what actually happened, shall we?

On 1st September 2023, Jungkook's birthday, Jimin posted this pic:

He got so much hate for it from tkkrs, solos and antis. It was so horrible and downright vile.

But you know, Jikook karma with Jungkook as the reigning master was just lurking in the shadows, waiting for the perfect moment to strike.

No one saw it coming.

Not gonna lie, what Jungkook did had me floored. He went and posted a shirtless pic of himself at the gym:

What floored me wasn't the shirtless pic itself. It was the date. 13, it's Jimin's number. Jungkook posted this exactly one month before Jimin's birthday.

You thought it was over right?

Well. NO

Here's the jaw dropper. The time he posted this pic. 11:58 am KST.

IT'S JIMIN'S BIRTH TIME

Deliberate wasn't it? That's exactly what he was aiming for.

From then on we got pics and videos of him shirtless. And that AYS pic. The one with Jimin's name written across Jungkook's abs. A gift for us but a f*** off to the antis.

This is not the first time he had defended Jimin.

1) We all remember Jungkook's pure joy in AYS. How those were the best trips of his life. How he wanted to do it with Jimin till they're fifty. Make memories to take back home. How everyone else is just a guest on the show.

2) Making phone calls to Seokjin and Hoseok's birthday lives together. Sending flower wreaths together. Flirting with each other on social media.

3) This snippet from his live:

All these, a huge "screw you" to the antis out there. Jimin antis being the key word.

These above stated 1,2, and 3 are very recent moments. There are countless other moments from the past too. But I want to bring back a particular one. For that let's go back to 2021.

On 17th Nov 2021, BTS left for Los Angeles for their PTD On Stage concert and to attend AMAs.

On 25th Nov 2021, Jimin posted a pic of himself at a beach in LA on Weverse:

On 30th Nov 2021, Sojang a Youtuber known for spreading baseless and malicious rumors about BTS dropped a video claiming that Jimin was on a date with two female idols on that beach. Her "proof" was a beach sunset pic posted by Yein in Nov 2021.

The situation became worse when more articles were made saying both the beach pics are from the same place and time. Common, random articles used by both artists were used as "proofs" of them dating.

A few hours after the video dropped "a member" posted pics of Jimin, Jungkook and Taehyung at the same beach Jimin had earlier shared the pics of:

I love the second pic so much. It's so romantic and sweet how Jimin and Jungkook are facing each other with the sunset as background. Particularly Jungkook. Sunset is a very beautiful view right? But here we have Jungkook not facing the sunset but Jimin (a much more beautiful, "pretty" view in Jungkook's eyes).

Ahhh I went off track. Let's get back to the topic real quick.

So, these pics posted were actually a response to Sojang and the articles. An initial debunking of their false claims. This proved that Jimin went to that beach together with Jungkook and Taehyung.

Sources found that Jimin's pic was of Santa Monica beach, posted on 25th Nov 2021 while Yein's pic was of Manhattan beach, posted on 27th Nov 2021.

On 1st Dec 2021 this special, sweet moment happened. Jungkook walked up behind Jimin, wrapped himself around him, stared intently, leaned in close, put his chin on his shoulder, stared again until Jimin turned into a shy, flustered mess. Then Jungkook walked away smiling hand over his chest (Yeah your heart belongs to Jimin. I know Jungkook, I know)

youtube

To me it felt like a statement. Like Jungkook was saying "Jimin is mine". He was showing everyone that only he has that effect on Jimin and vice versa by putting his hand over his heart.

Watching the content from that time, when they were in LA, really shows how inseparable Jimin and Jungkook were. Glued to each other on stage, off stage, off camera. Eating together, working out together, Jungkook spending four hours in Jimin's room three times a day (basically, sharing the same room). They were always together.

On 6th Dec 2021, Jimin, Jungkook and Seokjin flew back to SK. Jungkook and Seokjin are the first to arrive while Jimin gets held back. Seokjin leaves. Jungkook stays back and waits 20 mins for Jimin to arrive so that they can leave for their home (not homes) together. But later they get separated due to covid restrictions and take different cars.

This is the time when their company announces that BTS members are opening their individual IG accounts.

And guess what Jungkook chose as his very first profile pic and post on IG?

This one:

Both were of the beach they visited together while in LA.

He even tagged the beach location thus confirming they were at Santa Monica and that the three of them went there together. Also, confirming that Jimin and Yein indeed were not together.

Now we have got a good idea which member actually posted those pics on their official account right?

Bro couldn't wait to shut down all those rumors. He dropped the location like a mic, loud and clear. No more guessing games. Just facts.

He then posted a story where Jimin and Taehyung can be seen. Once again with location.

First profile pic - Santa Monica

First post - Santa Monica

First story - Santa Monica

All check, Jungkook. Good job!

By the way, love the colors 🌈

I thought that was it. But no. Jungkook wasn't done yet. He had more to say. And he made sure we all heard it without saying a word.

On 10th Dec 2021, Jungkook deleted the beach story only to repost it again. But this time with the beach location and the date

On 19th Dec 2021, Sojang posted a defamation rumor against Taehyung. Which prompted him to say that he's suing her.

On 22nd Dec 2021, Sojang posted dating rumor about Jungkook and Yubi. The rumors were denied by both the parties.

On 30th Dec 2021, Sojang posted a dating rumor between Namjoon and a random girl. The next day, Namjoon posted a story on Weverse denying the rumor. He later deleted it.

On 31st Dec 2021, Jungkook posted this:

Once again Santa Monica was the star. I wanna say I was not surprised when I saw this. But I was. Because I lost count of the times he posted about it.

It was kind of wild honestly. Jungkook kept posting the same thing over and over, like he really wanted to drill it into everyone's heads. Emphasizing on the location and date. No drama, no direct call outs. Just facts. Repeated facts. He was on a personal mission to shut down the rumors.

And the thing is he'd never done that for anyone else. Not for Yoongi (Yoongi and Suran), not for Hoseok (Hoseok and Irene) and not for Namjoon (Namjoon and the poodle girl). All these were baseless rumors too. But with Jimin? He went all out. Like he was saying, "Nope. Not my bf."

But really. It's honestly impossible to ignore what Jungkook did. He's never gone this far for anyone else. Never posted the same thing over and over making sure every little detail was clear. Not for anyone else. But for Jimin? It was like he was quietly saying "You're mine to protect and I'll make sure everyone knows it".

A huge shout out to my dearest bff @jkjm9597 who very graciously shared with me the timeline of Jungkook's IG posts for Santa Monica. Love you 💜 She's not very active here. But you may know her as @myhomeisjkjm on X. She's so amazing.

Also, thanks to anon for sending this ask. I loved answering it!

Credits to the owner of the video

#jikook #kookmin #jungkook #jimin #ask

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beardedjoel · 2 years ago

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pretty little wife | better now

joel miller x f!reader one shot collection

series masterlist | main masterlist | ao3 summary: 3.9k words, a snippet of a day in the life of husband! joel and his lovely housewife | no apocalypse au, no use of y/n warnings: 18+ MDNI! pre-established relationship/dynamic, unprotected piv, rough sex, free use kink, sub/dom relationship, cum play, spit kink, exhibition kink, dirty talk, pet names for reader, brief mention of alcohol, generally extremely submissive reader so if you're into that this is for you! a/n: not pretending this is anything other than some little fantasy i had that i needed to write out. i'm really excited about this one shot series for husband!joel though, i have some really fun (and depraved) ideas planned for these two for future blurbs so stayed tuned if you like this one! reblogs + comments are always loved and appreciated! ♡

i've decided to start a kofi in case anyone wants to consider a small donation to support my work! ♡

How’s my pretty little wife today?

The words you look forward to each day, falling from your husbands lips in some form or another, whether it’s rasped tenderly in your ear, from between your legs as he smirks up at you, or from over your shoulder as he slams his cock into you, sending you to heaven and back down as soon as he can after walking in the door after work.

Joel asks the question today after walking up behind you in the backyard, his mouth already next to your ear, warm breath tickling along your skin there as he brushes your hair over your shoulder. The wiry texture of his beard nuzzles right into your neck, sending a thrill down your spine as his arms slide around your waist and hold you tightly to him, swaying you back and forth. The motion is soothing, reminding you that you’re right where you’re meant to be.

You can smell the workday on him - sweat and dirt and the outdoors, and the lingering scent of the cologne you’d given him this past Christmas. He’d sprayed it on this morning, as he does every morning since you bought it for him. Makes me think of you all day, he’d remind you while you’d watched from your bed with a teasing smile, sheet disheveled and draped over your naked body.

You breathe all of it in, savoring this scent unique to your husband, before touching your hand to where his rests around your belly and stroking it gently.

“Better now,” you answer. More times than not, that’s your response to his routine question, knowing it drives him wild, makes a long day of work ache a little less when he hears you say it.

“S’what I like to hear,” he says, a kiss on your neck leading up to your lips - a long, deep, ravenous kiss that already leaves you breathless. He pulls away so suddenly you nearly have whiplash, your head falling slightly into nothing, missing his lips.

“Smells good out here,” Joel comments, turning his nose up in the air slightly. “Usin’ the new pizza oven already?”

When you’d made a passing comment about wishing you could make wood fired pizzas at home, just like the ones a restaurant in town serves, Joel seemed to take it seriously, as he did with most things involving your wishes and desires. The next weekend, he’d hauled in bricks and began his work. You’d stepped out into the yard when you heard all the commotion, giving him a quizzical stare, and he’d simply grinned and shrugged, like it was the most obvious thing in the world that he should be building his wife a pizza oven. You’d nearly teared up, feeling grateful and giddy with excitement at your new toy to experiment with.

Within a few weekends, Joel had finished his new project, always seeming to need one to have around the house, wiping the sweat off his forehead and gleaming with pride at it as he showed you the final product. You’d practically jumped for joy but settled on flinging yourself into his arms to show your appreciation. When that had turned into him fucking you on top of the kitchen counter moments later after he went inside to fetch a cold drink, you hadn’t minded one bit.

“I couldn’t wait,” you say with a grin. When Joel nuzzles your neck again you start to lose your train of thought. His lips press a gentle kiss right on your pulse point, and you sigh into it. “T-trying out margherita today,” you manage to squeak out.

“Hmm,” Joel says, seemingly contemplating the flavor choice in between latching his lips on your neck and sucking, marking you over and over. You’re sure the ones from mere days ago haven’t faded all the way, a smattering of them going right down to your tits, but Joel always needs a fresh mark on you as soon as they start to fade, a way for you to always remember you’re his. He grinds his hard length into your back on the next touch of his lips, and you arch into it a little, your cunt starting to ache more needily for him.

“F-fresh basil… from the… gar-” you gasp as he pulls you completely flush against his cock, letting out a little, devious laugh.

“Sounds fuckin’ delicious, baby,” he replies. His fingers reach down and toy with the front hem of your dress, delicately sliding his calloused fingers up your thighs, bunching the fabric as he goes. The warmth of his hands on your bare skin blazes a trail up to the apex of your thighs, finally cupping a hand around your warm heat. You instinctively grind into the heel of his hand, and can practically feel Joel smirking behind you. His fingers brush the outside of your panties, starting to rub circles on the wet fabric. He lets out a low growl, deep and needy in the back of his throat feeling the evidence of how much you’d anticipated him coming home.

“So wet for me already, huh, doll? Couldn’t wait f’me to get home ‘n take care of ya, I bet,” Joel taunts in your ear before sucking on the lobe, and you’ve gone breathless now, nodding your head. His fingers tease the edge of your panties again, finally slipping one underneath the fabric, feeling the obscenity of your wetness directly, and he lets out an impressed tut, sucking in air between his teeth. You nearly moan out at the smallest touch he’s giving you, the way his rough, worn fingers gently brush over your clit for just a split second.

“She’s so needy, ain’t she?” Joel coos in your ear, swiping a finger to your entrance and back to your clit. You can feel how slickness quickly gathers on Joel’s digits as he teases you. You squeeze your eyes shut and lean back into him, letting your head drop to his shoulder as pleasure wracks your body already.

“Mhm… needs you,” you murmur, turning your head towards his where he meets your lips, continuing steady strokes on your aching bundle of nerves. His lips are softer than you’d think, looking at the hardened grump behind them, but like so many parts of Joel, they are only soft for you.

“Needy, needy girl… good thing I’ve been thinkin’ about gettin’ my cock in that little cunt of yours all day.”

“A-all day?” you say with a little smirk, rutting your ass back into his throbbing length, and Joel groans with the friction.

“Second I pulled out of it this mornin’,” he replies, low voice drumming against your skin, and you shudder, desperate for what you know he’s about to do.

Another routine of yours - Joel comes home from work, and more days than not, he fucks you. And you enjoy every second of it, basking in the attention and his cock filling you up in the way nobody and nothing else can. You crave him night and day, never having gotten your fill, wondering if you ever could. His hunger for you in return only fuels the fire, a vicious circle the two of you seem to have no intention of breaking.

Your weakness lies completely in the man standing behind you, burying his fingers in between your legs and making you moan out wildly before he’s even had his way with you.

“Fuck, gotta get this cock in you, baby, split you open f’me so good, fuck you stupid,” Joel grunts suddenly, interrupting your swirling thoughts, withdrawing his fingers in a flash and leaving you whimpering. It’s not fair, the way he affects you.

Nobody should have this power over you, but the minute you’d met Joel, you couldn’t deny the way he’d made you feel. Masculine and warm, rough hands and broad shoulders that you’d clung to that same night you’d met him in a bar, fucking mere hours later in the bathroom. Even in your drunken haze you’d submitted to him fully, Joel having no problem ordering and throwing you around the bathroom like you were just a toy to play with, his little doll. You’d found that you could never look back after that night, the safety he represented to you, the adoration he showered you with, the way he fucked you like it was his last time every time. When Joel saw how willing you were to be his in the way he craved from a woman, there was no stopping the insatiable beast he became, hellbent on never letting another man feel your touch again. Joel promised you a good life, an amazing life, even, and in the last few years, he had more than delivered for you.

“Hush now, you’ll have what you want in a second,” he says, running a quick stroke of his fingers through your hair, giving it a tug. On principle, you let out a little mewl at the sensation, too many instances of your hair being tugged and pulled with Joel involved to not recall those memories with the pain of it. You hear the jangle of his belt as he frees himself from his jeans, the familiar sound of Joel’s thick, heavy cock slapping against his hand as he fists it. You’re already cock drunk without having seen the damn thing yet, and it’s nearly laughable how pliable you are when Joel’s involved. It’s always been that way - you’ve been happy to oblige his every desire, no matter when, where, how he wanted it, or the frequency. You were his to use, to pleasure, to fuck senseless, and you got off on the way all of it steadily built his need for you just as much as it did with your need for him.

“Please…” you whine, trying to slip out of his grasp and start for the sliding glass door to the house, making the assumption that he’d be taking you inside at any moment to take what he needed from you.

Joel immediately tightens his hold on you, a dark tut in your ear that goes straight to your clit.

“Not so fast, little doll,” he croons, hand grabbing your cunt through your dress again to hold you to him. “Right here,” he adds on, turning your body towards the outdoor dining table in the backyard.

“J-Joel… right here?” you question, knowing you shouldn’t. It won’t matter anyways. “The… t-the neighbors…” you whimper quietly as Joel crowds you against the table, tearing your dress up over your ass, revealing your lacy little thong to him. He groans at the sight of your bare ass ready for him to claim before roughly shimmying your underwear halfway down your thighs. He places a rough hand on your back, pressing you down into the table so that you’re completely bent over, your hands splaying out into the wood to support yourself.

“Let them see…” Joel says quietly, a heady murmur as he slips his cock between your thighs and notches himself at your weeping entrance. “Let them see how much I love fuckin’ my wife.” He pushes in on the last sentence, and you gasp at the stretch and burn of his girth. Your vision goes white for a moment with the mix of pure pain and pleasure, and your mouth hangs open, panting in delight as he fills you inch by inch.

“Mmm… such a sweet little pussy, honey…” Joel says quietly once he’s seated fully inside of you. He’s just as lost in the bliss of it as you are. “Know I’d fuckin’ live right here if I could.”

You give him a little moan of satisfaction, wiggling your hips to give yourself any sensation of movement from his cock. He places his hands on either side of your hips, squeezing his grip tightly enough to bruise before starting to thrust himself into you. You cry out in a yelp, the noise passing though your lips before you can even control it.

“Yeah…” you whimper, face pressed against the table, trying to peek up as Joel looms above you, like some higher being that has the power to decide your fate, to decide the pleasure or pain you’ll have to endure in this moment. And truthfully, you do worship him. The way he moves inside of you, makes you crumble underneath even the lightest of his touches. The way he spoils you in every regard - you’ve never wanted for a single thing for as long as you’ve been Joel’s, him vowing to take care of everything you ever need, and in return, you take care of everything he needs.

To some, it might seem like there’s a lack of balance in the way you do things, but fuck do you love it, you think as you desperately cling onto the table, manicured nails digging into the wood as Joel’s cock rams back into you, pressing so deep inside of you that you see stars.

You let out a low, strangled sound, whining as Joel begins to press against your cervix, the front of your thighs bumping into the table with every new thrust from him. He grunts with the exertion, fucking into you hard, taking what he wants, leaving you both breathless with the need for more of each other. You let Joel take and take and take because of how much he gives in return - while he loves to use you, he always makes sure you get every bit of pleasure you deserve for being so good to him.

When you continuously moan louder as Joel fucks you towards your high, you glance around, the small sliver of your brain that’s still rational worried about you two getting caught by your neighbors. The thought is equally mortifying as it is thrilling, but you decide you’d rather not deal with the embarrassment today if you can help it.

“Still worried about the neighbors, hm, pretty girl? I’ve got an idea,” Joel says, responding to your sudden nervousness. Before you can even answer, his hands are wrapping around your shoulders, urging you up from the table. You follow along, breathless and dazed, letting him move you as he wishes, too deliriously starry eyed for him to care about anything else other than what Joel is gearing up to do to you next.

He accidentally slides out with the movement of your body, and immediately he’s grasping at your hips, practically clawing his way back to you as he pulls you tight to his body again. His throbbing, dripping cock slaps periodically against your ass as he shoves you forward, pushing your body towards the house.

“Here,” he grits out, suddenly crowding your body from behind to press you against the sliding glass door. “That better?”

“I- yes,” you say, eyes wide from the way you’d been roughly handled by him the last few moments. Your cunt aches almost painfully, having been getting so close to your climax only to have it ripped away suddenly when Joel decided to move you.

“Good,” he snips quietly. “Couldn’t stand to keep this cock out of you much longer’n this.”

With his words he brings his lips to the back of your neck again, just his heavy breathing fanning across the skin there, making you wild as he repositions himself and nudges your legs apart with his knee. You feel the length of him tease between your legs, sliding up to your entrance again. He groans loudly, letting you know how badly he wants you, so you try to pop your hips up at just the right angle you know he’s looking for.

He slides in effortlessly and with a renewed vigor, hips snapping into you, pressing you further into the sliding glass door with neither of you seeming to be worried about the way it’s suddenly shaking on the frame. It’s completely lewd, the way you imagine the two of you - your entire body against glass, tits being pressed out the top of your dress and bouncing, palms spread against the smooth surface, nails clawing and unable to grasp at anything.

Your body is shaking in his hold now, Joel’s cock hitting inside of you in all the right places. You can feel yourself tensing, almost like every cell is going taut, your core pooling heat deep inside of you with molten pleasure from Joel hitting the spongy bit inside of you.

“Fuck, love it when you sound like that f’me, doll,” Joel punches out as he hears your moans becoming louder and more desperate the longer he continues to thrust against your g-spot. You can’t respond, only continue your lustful noises with a renewed vigor as you try to bounce your hips back into his thrusts, getting him deeper than what’s even possible, the length of him already burying up to the hilt each time he drives himself into you.

“Know you wanna come for me, baby,” he says right in your ear, voice hoarse with need, and you whimper in response as his hand snakes around your hips and in between your legs, circling a gentle pressure on your clit.

You feel your hold on reality completely break, your eyes squeezing shut as you melt into the way your entire body is tingling with pleasure now, waves of it turning into spasms as you go practically limp with shaky knees. Joel’s hands hold you in place, his warm strength keeping you upright as you push down onto his cock, riding out your climax and screaming for him.

When your movements start to slow and your body relaxes, Joel thrusts into you even harder, loving the way you’re so compliant and soft after climaxing, letting him move in you however he needs as you ride out the sensitive aftershocks with a few quiet yelps.

“This little pussy is all mine, y’know that, right?” Joel reminds you through clenched teeth, giving your ass a firm slap. You nod vigorously, eyes still half lidded and mind scrambled from the way he’d shattered you mere moments ago.

“Y-yes, Joel,” you say when he slaps your ass again, demanding an answer. Your breathy answer is enough to get him to his own climax, and he surprises you by pulling out suddenly, leaving your body lurching back into nothing, missing the fullness of him already. Before you can protest, say anything, Joel’s hands grip your shoulders and spin you around and push down, forcing you onto your knees in one fluid, swift motion. You watch, wide eyed, as he fists his throbbing cock, shiny and coated in your own slick arousal as he spreads it along his shaft in jerking motions.

“Be a good girl and open up,” he commands, and you submit to the words immediately, mouth hanging open, even sticking your tongue out for good measure. Joel smirks at that before giving himself another swift tug, and you watch in renewed wonder as he begins to spill himself all over your face, ropes of cum hitting your skin. You taste him on your tongue immediately, savoring it. Your eyes are glued up on Joel’s face, watching his glazed gaze taking in the scene below him as he groans in pleasure, trying not to tilt his head back and get lost in the moment so he doesn’t miss a beat of your beautiful surrender to him.

“Fuck,” he mutters as he watches the last bits of his release hit your tongue. “Don’t you dare swallow that, yet, doll,” he adds on quickly, eyes fluttering for a moment before he tucks himself back into his slacks. He continues to tower over you for a prolonged few seconds, looking down in satisfaction at the image of your glowing, angelic face coated in something so sinful, the milky substance starting to drip down your face, your tongue trembling slightly with the need to swallow.

“Hold still,” he says needlessly since as the words come out of his mouth he grabs your chin, tilting your head upwards and gathering spit, letting a long, tortuously slow drip of it fall into your open mouth. It lands on your tongue, combining with his cum and Joel smirks again, releasing your chin.

“Swallow, my little doll,” he says, voice starting to go soft, an indication that he’s feeling satisfied and finished with his enjoyment of you. You close your mouth, smile, and swallow obviously for him, licking your lips for good measure.

Joel holds out a hand, helping you stand, your legs buckling slightly as you try to get your bearings. He carefully smooths your disheveled dress, flattening the bottom half and tugging the neckline back into place before fixing the straps to sit perfectly square on your shoulders, eyes roaming over quickly to examine his work with pride. His hands then move to your hair, brushing his fingers gently to put it back in its place, leaving every part of you like none of this had just happened besides your face, still dripping with his spill. Your smile widens, seeing him watch a particularly large spot of it sliding down your cheek. You see his composure fail for a moment before he strokes your cheek gently, avoiding any of the mess there, giving you soft, affectionate eyes.

“Good girl,” he says quietly, leaning forward to kiss your forehead. “Pizza’s probably ready,” he adds on, the casual tone taking you aback for only a moment before you blink yourself back to reality and nod dutifully.

“Of course,” you say, a genuine smile plastered on your face as you look at your handsome husband, admiring the way he’s looking at you with stars dancing across his eyes, the deepest love for you tucked away in his deep brown irises.

“After you get that, go clean yourself up, doll,” he says, and you nod again, the smile not leaving your face. You see out of the corner of your eye Joel settle onto one of the chairs at your outdoor table, leaning back casually as if he hadn’t just had you bent over that exact table, fucking you for the entire neighborhood to possibly see and hear.

You gather everything you need, serving utensils, plates, and two cold beers before bringing it to the table along with the pizza and a freshly tossed salad you’d made to accompany it. Each time you drop something off, the smirk on Joel’s face grows, watching the way you work with the evidence of his obsession with you still lingering on your flushed cheeks.

Once the table is set and your face cleaned off, you join Joel outside to enjoy the beautiful spring evening, and see he’s already served you two generous slices of the margherita pizza.

He reaches a hand onto the table, taking yours delicately into his palm, dwarfing it with the size of his thick fingers as he absentmindedly runs his thumb along your knuckles, stopping to play with the large, gorgeous diamond on your ring finger. Another reminder to him that he has you all to himself, his pretty little wife.

“Thanks for dinner, baby” he says, eyes locked on yours as he uses a free hand to pick up the pizza and take a large bite, letting out a little noise in satisfaction at the flavor.

“Anytime.” You smile, genuine and tranquil, a fresh appreciation and love for the life you’ve found yourself so grateful to be living.

tysm to @jupiter-soups @huffle-punk @rensraptor for so much help with ideas and writing this fic! love u guys x

#PLS DON'T LET THIS FLOP i'm very proud of it #fic: pretty little wife #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller smut #x reader #pedro pascal character x reader

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wynnyfryd · 5 months ago

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no context WIP snippet

ty @mugloversonly and @just-my-latest-hyperfixation for the tag, i'm several days late as usual but here's a little bit of a wip i just found from april 2023 that i'm kinda fucking obsessed with. warning canon-typical horror scenarios? idk man

---

It’s not the worst place to die, Eddie thinks. At least he’s got a hot guy he’s half in love with next to him. “You wanna jerk each other off?” he jokes, straining with the effort. Christ, his breath is whistling. He hopes it’s not a punctured lung.

Steve doesn’t dignify his silly shit with a response, just rolls his head against the mossy stone and drops his chin to give him a classically bitchy you’re a goddamn idiot kind of look. Pure Steve aimed right at him like a laser.

“Fuck, you’re hot,” Eddie tells him.

“Quit screwing around.”

“Oh, I’m deadly serious.”

Steve rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling, the corner of his mouth ticking up a notch. Pretty boy. Goddamn. His face twists up in pain as he pushes himself into a crouch, maneuvering awkwardly in the pit, not much room with two grown men and a corpse down here. (Carcass? What do you call dead demo-shit?) Eddie lets his eyes drift shut. Not sleeping, just resting. Just for a second.

“Whatcha doing?” he asks Steve, trying to guess based on the rustling of fabric and the squelch of rotten leaves.

“Looking for a— fuck, no, no no, hey!” Steve’s above him suddenly, on top of him, straddling his thighs and tapping his cheek urgently with the tips of his fingers. “Don’t you dare pass out on me.”

Eddie smiles lazily, bucks his hips up a little and leers at him for his own amusement. Shit hurts.

“Jesus Christ,” Steve huffs. “Stop moving, you horny little jackass, I gotta— mmph. Gotta fix your rib.” Eddie moves his hands to Steve’s hips. Squeezes. Steve’s breath wobbles. “Seriously, Eddie, c’mon, let me make sure you’re not gonna bleed out on me first, man.”

“Fine,” Eddie pouts. “Be boring.”

---

tagging @steddieisland @hexiewrites @frankenstein-ate-my-left-shoe @grandwretch @griefabyss69 @bananahoneycomb and anyone else who wants to play

#steddie #steddie wip #steddie fic #steve harrington #eddie munson #wip game

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dragonbarbie · 1 year ago

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𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐌𝐄 𝐏𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐑 | Part 1

aegon x best friend!reader ; modern!au

summary: this fic is snippets of aegon and reader's relationship as they grow up and discover new feelings. but to let himself be loved, aegon has to first do some growing up.

rating: 18+, minors dni.

tags: alcohol, substance abuse.

word count: 4.2k

series masterlist

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A/N: i'm so excited to share my first full fic! this series is very very lowkey inspired by one day and highkey inspired by peter by taylor swift. comment if you'd like to be on the taglist for this! hope you guys like it :)

divider credit @ cafekitsune!

Age 10

“I still don't see why we had to move here." a sullen, 10 year old Y/N replied, pouting as she stared out the window from the backseat. her father couldn't help an amused smile at the little girl as he drove towards her new school. "i told you darling, daddy’s got a very important new job here in king’s landing." "yes but why did I have to move here." the older man let out a patient sigh. this had been going on weeks leading to their move. "you haven't even given the city a chance yet, kiddo. why do you hate it already?" "because..." the little girl started with an exasperated whine. ".... i don't have any friends here!" "you have me." her father offered with an assuring grin. the unamused look he got in return was not grateful in the least. "you're dad. i want friends." the seriousness with which Y/N declared her dilemma earned her a laugh from the front seat.

her father pulled into the curb by the grand iron gates of Red Keep Academy, the best private school in the city. as Y/N hopped out the backseat, looking deflated, he lowered the car window, "hey c'mon now, you can't start your first day all sad. who knows, maybe you'll come back with a hoard of friends, even more than you had back home." Y/N only looked ahead at him, unconvinced. "bye, dad."

as she made her way towards the main archway to the school, she thought of all the things she was missing about home. not the new townhouse they had in the city, her real home, back in the reach. she thought of the swing behind her house, the smell from the bakery next door, the big oak tree she saw on the way to school every morning, the fountain in the park – when suddenly someone ran past her, fast enough to knock her down.

"ouch!" she cried out from the floor, rubbing her shoulder where she had been hit. "aegon!" a woman suddenly rushed to her side, glowering at the little boy who had pushed past her. "are you okay, honey? were you hurt?" the first thing Y/N noticed was how kind the woman looked with her big brown eyes, and so very pretty. "i'm okay." she reassured in a small voice, before turning to give this 'Aegon', the dirtiest look she could muster.

the boy had to be her age, pale blonde hair that looked like someone had tried to comb it but had not been given enough time to finish the job. he wore a matching school uniform to Y/N, navy blue blazer, white shirt and dark green pants. his shirt though was untucked and seemed to already have mud stains.

she thought he seemed mostly unbothered by his own actions, but stood there attempting to look sheepish nonetheless for his mother.

"apologise to this young lady." his mother demanded. "sorry..." he mumbled almost incomprehensibly. already upset and now physically hurt, Y/N wordlessly got up and hurried away, trying to stop hot tears from spilling out.

as she walked away she heard the boy's mother scold him, "that was not an apology, Aegon. go say sorry, properly this time." she heard a childish groan in response, "do I have to?". his mother must have given him one hell of a look, Y/N thought because she heard her say nothing else but small footsteps came jogging up to her.

as the blonde boy walked next to her, she waited for him to say something while she kept walking ahead, but he seemed to just wordlessly fall in stride with her. After a minute he suddenly asked, “do you even know where you’re going?”

now that he mentioned it, she didn’t.

she suddenly stopped and looked around herself, confused. He stopped with her and studied her for a second. “I don’t know you.” He observed. “are you new?”. She decided to stay silent, hoping he would go away if she ignored him but she was wrong. When she didn’t respond, he continued, “you’re going in the wrong direction, new girl. That way –” he pointed to where she had been headed “—is the middle school building. Primary school is this way.” He started walking down a hallway, and Y/N took hurried steps to follow him.

He gave her a sideway glance, “what grade are you in anyway? Third?” he smugly asked, proudly looking down at her as a mature fifth-grader. “fifth.” She snapped at him. “oh”, he responded, surprised. “who’s class?” “Miss Reyne.” “no kidding!” he gave her a toothy grin. “so am I.”

Y/N didn’t like this Aegon, she decided. As he kept chatting away about how boring Miss Reyne was, she gave him no replies and generally walked as if she were alone and had no association with the silver haired boy beside her. As they settled into class, she was determined to avoid him for the rest of her day. Aegon though, was determined for quiet the opposite.

He took a seat next to hers, kept making comments, providing her a running, private commentary about each teacher and student. He wasn’t affected by Y/N’s lack of a response, or if he was, he didn’t let it show. Y/N had to admit though, he was funny. she couldn’t help but crack a smile when he told her about the time Jason Lannister got gum stuck in his hair, and had to suppress a giggle when Aegon impersonated Mr. Bolton falling asleep mid-way through teaching a class. At these small instances of Y/N’s guard breaking, he flashed her a bright smile, pleased with himself.

Y/N though, didn’t utter a word to him. Until Art class that was.

They had been asked to paint an animal, and when Y/N looked up from the goldfish she had been painting, she saw Aegon’s work. “a dragon isn’t a real animal.” She disproved. The boy merely shrugged, “that’s not an animal either, it’s a fish.”

“a fish is an animal.” She frowned at her work. “it’s just an animal under water.”

“oh well, let’s add some of its natural habitat then.” He smirked, grabbing the bowl of water they’d been sharing to clean their brushes. “NO! stop!” in an attempt to block him from pouring water on her work, the brush in her hand smeared some of the yellow paint on his face.

He froze in his action immediately, bringing up his fingers to feel the paint streak running down from his brow to across his nose. This time Y/N couldn’t suppress her laughter at the sight, his blinking expression making it all the more funnier. “well, if that’s how you want to do this!” he declared as he scooped some of the red paint on his two fingers before smearing it on her cheek.

Within five minutes, their respective art works had been abandoned and both sets of uniform utterly ruined. The two had to be separated by their teacher, then ordered to walk down to the washrooms and clean themselves right up.

The second she left the girls washroom though, Y/N found the silver haired boy waiting for her by the door, some green paint still visibly stuck in his pale locks. “race you to class?” he mischievously suggested. “Hmm” Y/N pretended to think about the challenge for a second, before saying “okay” and dashing towards their class.

With a self-satisfied smile at having beaten Aegon, she took her seat. Sulking at his defeat, Aegon slinked back in his chair, “you cheated, didn’t wait for the ‘go’…”

“win’s a win.” Y/N declared, grabbing golden glitter for her fish.

He didn’t stay grumpy for long though, before she knew it he was back to his talkative self, this time with Y/N chiming in with her own comments. The hours flew by with Aegon by her side, and as the day came to an end Y/N realised she’d enjoyed herself after all.

As they walked towards the school gate to leave, Aegon suddenly changed the topic. “you like video games?” “yeah…?” she hesitantly replied. “great, you’re coming over tomorrow to play some.” He beamed. At the end of the sentence Y/N observed he hadn’t actually asked her a question. “okay.” She found herself agreeing.

“cool, see you tomorrow.” Aegon had started running in the direction of one of the cars, when he suddenly stopped and turned around. “never asked your name.” he sheepishly realised.

“Y/N!” she distractedly answered as she sped up, having found her mom’s car in the parking lot.

“Y/N…” Aegon muttered to himself as he walked away, liking the way the name rolled of his tongue.

Age 15

“You’re late.” Y/N didn’t even bother to look up when she heard the window to her bedroom open, but did glance at the subsequent sound of someone falling face first onto her carpet. “have you been drinking? Its 2pm.”

Down on the ground laid her best friend of five years, with his messy platinum hair and stick-thin lanky limbs, carrying in the distinct smell of smoke when he entered her room. Though they were the same age, aegon looked more boyish still even as he had started to race towards every vice of the adult world he could get his hands on.

Aegon merely rubbed his now injured nose, as he lifted his head off the ground. “No I haven’t been drinking… still drunk from last night. Big difference.” Y/N sighed and shook her head in vexation before returning to her homework. Aegon had recently taken up drinking and despite Y/N’s repeated rebukes, he seemed to be enjoying himself a little too much to stop. He continued to wave off her concern and she was starting to tire of voicing it.

“Let’s say I believed you… you wanna tell me what made you so late, then? I do have other things to do with my day than wait around to teach you biology, y’know.” Aegon grabbed a chair and dragged it to sit next to her at her desk. “I was actually busy being taught biology as it happens… albeit of a different kind.” His smug, self-satisfied grin as he pulled a cigarette from his front pocket and placed it between his teeth, told Y/N all she needed to know. “Elinda Massey was the most enthusiastic of teachers.” Y/N couldn’t help but grit her teeth at the mention of Aegon’s latest distraction.

With a swift motion she grabbed the cigarette and threw it in the bin, ignoring his protests. “you know you’re not allowed to smoke in here, my parents would kill me if they smelled it.” Aegon snorted at the statement, “yeah but, that’s never stopped me before.” The casualness with which Aegon dismissed her, pinched Y/N. It was certainly true that Y/N usually found it hard to say no to Aegon, no matter how the consequences might harm her; but she didn’t like how he took the same for granted, as if it was a given.

“What’s got you all prissy today?”

“you. You wanna pass biology this year or not?” Y/N replied, visibly irritated. “yeah like there’s a chance in hell they’ll actually fail me. Grandfather would have the place shut within the week.” “then why do you even need a tutor? Go off with Elinda or whoever.” Y/N huffed, her eyes remaining trained so hard on her textbook that she was half certain she was going to burn holes into it, her hand clutching around the pencil in her hand.

“Elinda? That’s what you’re so annoyed about?” aegon snickered. Y/N turned to now glare directly into his blue eyes, a blush creeping up her cheeks and her nostrils flaring. In that moment she wanted nothing more than to push aegon right out the window he came from so she could be alone instead of having to deal with this. “No, I just think you’re wasting your time here right now, when you could be doing…. Biology with Elinda instead.” Aegon brow furrowed at her reaction, but instead of another retort his hand reached out to gently grab her arm. “hey…” his features softened from their usual impish nature to highlight his concern “…what’s actually up with you?” in the face of such kindliness from him, she couldn’t muster any more scathing replies.

He’d seen right through her, like only he could. For weeks now she’d been stressed, but found the topic too awkward to discuss with Aegon. But she knew she’d have to open up to him sooner or later about her problem. Keeping secrets from Aegon was simply not something she did. Or even possibly could if she tried, she thought.

“promise you won’t laugh.” She first demanded in a nervous tone. Raising his three fingers, her best friend solemnly confirmed, “scouts honour.” She swallowed, her eyes looking beyond Aegon’s shoulder rather than at him as she slowly admitted. “I’ve not had my first kiss.”

Aegon merely blinked back at her, “what, is there supposed to be more to that or…?” “I’ve not had my first kiss.” She repeated as if those words were supposed to be self-explanatory. “yeah and I’ve never been to the Summer Isles, what’re you on about?” Y/N couldn’t help a groan as she momentarily hid her face behind her hands, thinking the more she would explain herself the more embarrassed she would get.

“It’s just, I’m 15, and I should have had it by now, I’ve never even been on a date.. and… and… and you’ve got Elinda and Maria before that, and Jeyne and, and…. I just can’t believe you’ve gone to third base before I’ve even had my first kiss!” her words came out rushed in the end, out of frustration and a need to just get the shameful confession over with.

She had expected Aegon to laugh it off, or worse, agree that her situation was absolutely the height of shame. Instead, he looked confused that such a thing was bothering her in the first place “what, that’s it? why didn’t you just say so before?”

nonchalantly, aegon put an arm behind Y/N’s chair. Eyes closed, he suddenly leaned in towards her, lips puckered, causing her eyes to go wide. “what the –” as a reflex response she pushed back at his shoulders, making him fall of the chair.

“the fuck was that for!” he shouted from the floor, his ego and back bruised. “why did you try to kiss me?” Y/N was shocked, horrified even, at the prospect. Aegon was her best friend, she couldn’t even imagine looking at him in that light. it was Aegon, he was simply too familiar for her.

Aegon raised his hands out as if the answer was obvious. “you said it yourself you wanted to have your first kiss!”. Y/N’s nose scrunched up, “not with you!”.

“well how was I supposed to get that! Fuck me, I’ll never understand you women”

“‘you women?’” at that, Y/N couldn’t help but laugh. This scene before her, this response by her best friend was too ridiculous. Yet, she noted as she offered a hand to help him back up which he grumblingly took, this was very much in character for Aegon. She knew he always wanted to help her, he might not have always understood how to go about it, but his heart was in the right place.

“I don’t need you to fix it, aegon.” She affably told him, a faint grateful smile on her face for her friend’s valiant effort nonetheless. “yeah, no-shit, because there’s nothing to fix. You’re not broken, Y/N.” Y/N didn’t know that she needed to hear those words until Aegon said it and it felt as if a burden was lifted off her shoulders.

“Don’t get me wrong. Doing all this, the kissing and the more-than-kissing, it’s fun. Honestly it’s so, so much fun, like I can’t even—” “you wanna get to your point?” “–so it’s great and all but, not doing it doesn’t mean you’re any less for it. You’re still Y/N, you’ll always still be Y/N to me.”

The anxiety she had been feeling, the fear of being left behind and the worry about other’s judgement, even her own – it all started to look so small and insignificant when Aegon told her she was still the same to him. This was her only constant in life, this bond between her and Aegon, the one person she couldn’t hide who she was from. In that moment, she felt glad to have him by her side.

“Besides if you were ever truly that desperate, you could always just try Jace. he’s had a thing for you like forever” Aegon revealed, rolling his eyes in apparent annoyance of the fact. Y/N though, couldn’t believe what she was hearing. “Jace… has a thing for me?” The thought of it seemed to please her, she tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear as a red blush started to creep onto her cheeks once more.

Aegon looked disgusted at her response, and grimaced, “yeah okay, no need to flatter yourself too much …. It’s Jace.” He stuck his tongue out at the distaste of the thought of his best friend with his nephew. Y/N didn’t pay him any attention, having taken to doodling hearts in the margins of her notebook while engrossed in thought. Aegon immediately regretted having said anything, snatching the notebook from under her hand, “alright are we going to do some biology or what?”

Age 17

Y/N had been fast asleep when the familiar sound of pebbles against her window awoke her. she looked at the time on the watch as it read 2:17 am, quickly rising from her bed. there was only one person who had to be out there, and she knew why too. her heart sank, knowing already that aegon must have had another fight with his father. she opened the window and as expected, aegon targaryen precariously balanced his steps on the tree branch just outside.

"aegon, what are you doing? It's late," she whispered-shouted, trying not to wake her parents but already held out a hand to help him in. "Needed to see you," he slurred, his breath reeking of alcohol. She wanted to chide him for endangering himself by climbing up so high when he’d drunk so much, but looking at his condition she decided to stay quiet. He climbed into her room, stumbling slightly as he landed. Y/N caught his arm, steadying him. "You've been drinking again," she said, more as a statement than a question.

aegon’s normally sparkling blue eyes were unfocused, his silver hair dishevelled. He'd grown taller of late, she missed the days when she could stand shoulder to shoulder with him. she now had to look up at him, as she put one of his arms around her shoulder to guide him towards the bed as his own steps fumbled.

“He doesn’t get it, Y/N. None of them do. To him, nothing i've done or will do matters for shit. i'm just not the son he wanted. he regrets me, i can see it in his eyes, I—” a sob escaped his throat, cutting him off mid-sentence.

She gently sat him down on the edge of her bed, his weight pressing down on the soft mattress. As she looked into his sad, bloodshot eyes, she harboured such hatred for Viserys as she thought impossible for anyone else to hold. she kneeled down in front of him, her heart breaking to see him so.

"I know, i know. But you can’t keep doing this, aegon. If you keep drinking like this, you could seriously hurt yourself one of these days." and she didn't think she could survive that.

she reached out to hold his hands in her own. "You don't have to do this alone. I'm here for you. Always." if aegon heard her, he gave no indication, instead staring at their intertwined hands.

"can I crash here tonight?" he suddenly asked, looking more innocent than she'd ever seen him as he lifted his eyes to look up at her. Gone was the bravado and arrogance that was usual of him, even expected. In that moment he looked more lost than ever, and was looking to her as if she was his only hope for shelter.

she knew her parents wouldn't be thrilled about this impromptu sleepover, but then again she'd never had the ability to deny him anything. "of course," she tenderly smiled.

he kicked off his shoes and moved back up the bed, still holding onto her hand, pulling her with him. he lied down on her pillow, refusing to let go of her hand as he closed his eyes to fall asleep. he looked so peaceful, Y/N couldn’t help but reach out her free hand to run it through his hair in admiration. She wasn’t blind, she knew how handsome he looked, causing the girls to flock to him like moths to a flame. But his looks were just an objective fact to her, she never found herself attracted to him in the same way as the girl at school. But somehow in the pale moonlight, he looked more beautiful than she’d ever seen him, and it caused her chest to swell overwhelmingly.

she looked down to notice he'd opened his eyes again. "Don't leave," he mumbled, his voice thick with exhaustion.

"I won't" she promised, pulling the blanket over them both. he nodded in satisfaction of her reply, nestling against the crook of her neck, his breathing evening out as he drifted into a fitful sleep.

Sleep evaded Y/N though, on the one hand she was wracked with worry over Aegon and his drinking habits, on the other.... she could feel his breath tickling her neck, as his one hand held her own while his other wrapped around her waist, his feet entangled with hers. his body pressed to her own under the covers, making the cramped space on her single bed too hot. Aegon had never been this physically close to her, this vulnerable. she thought how his safe space, the place he ran to when he wanted an escape was her, same as he was for her. it had always been this way, yet, in the darkness of the night she sensed something had shifted between them. she couldn't name it yet, though.

The next morning, when the first light of dawn seeped through the curtains, aegon stirred. He blinked, confusion clouding his eyes at his surroundings. The first thing he noticed was the familiar face inches from his own "Y/N?" Y/N merely hummed in response, only now starting to stir awake. "what... how did i get here?" he asked looking around the room, startled. He lifted his head as he realised he was all but laid out on top of her, before moving away to lay on his back. He looked down to find his hand had cramped from holding onto hers all night, immediately releasing it. Y/N rubbed the sleep from her eyes as she responded, "what d'you mean?"

"i mean what am i doing in your bed at the crack of dawn." aegon looked earnestly confused, Y/N realised, which worried her. "You came here last night," she slowly replied, watching his face carefully. "You were drunk. Do you remember?"

aegon frowned, rubbing his temples. "No... I don't." he suddenly looked at Y/N, "Did I do something... did we...?" he motioned to the space between them, his brow raised. Y/N sat up from her bed in alarm, "oh, no, nothing. of course not." she reassured him. she tried not to look too wounded at his relieved expression "good, good." he nodded, staring up at the ceiling.

"you had a fight with your dad and wanted to crash here. do you not remember coming up here last night?" "I don't remember anything really. last thing I do remember is opening one of the bottles from the wine cellar and then" he shrugged. Y/N frowned at his response, "Aegon, have you started blacking out?” her stomach tied itself in knots, feeling anxiety over this new development. But she felt as if she was the only one who understood the gravity of the situation.

she searched for any fear in aegon’s eyes, but only found apathy and disinterest. he seemed unconcerned, merely rolling onto his side and closing his eyes, lazily stretching himself out to get comfortable to fall back asleep.

“do you understand what that means? it means this is getting dangerous. This is no longer all for a good time, Egg.” She attempted again, this time raising her voice to catch his attention. It seemed to fall on deaf ears.

"wake me up for lunch, yeah?" he yawned, drifting back to slumber within minutes.

A wave of anger washed over her, she wanted to knock him off her bed or hit him with a pillow in frustration over his own self-destructive ways. Did he not understand the ending he was currently headed towards? Did he not care how this going to affect him, affect her? She was tired of being the only safety harness keeping him held back when all he seemed to want to do was jump into the abyss.

“fucking… suit yourself.” She stormed off the bed to head out of her room, shutting the door behind her loudly.

#aegon targaryen imagine #aegon ii targaryen x reader #aegon targaryen x reader #aegon x reader #aegon ii x you #aegon ii x reader #hotd imagine #house of the dragon fanfiction #aegon x y/n #aegon x you #aegon ii x y/n #aegon targaryen x you #hotd x reader #hotd x y/n #hotd x you #fics i wrote #modern!aegon x reader #modern!aegon targaryen

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sflow-er · 1 month ago

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"I think we who 'fit the norms' have a responsibility to understand those who live their lives differently. We need to know how to listen." Axel Åhman, Efter nio, 2020

One of the great things about discovering KAJ is that I have also fallen a tiny bit in love with Axel Åhman outside of the group. I mean, I haven't even had the chance to read his books yet, but the kinds of things I've seen him discuss in his writer and journalist role have already really endeared him to me.

It started with his documentary show Utanför boxen. Most specifically, episode 4, in which Axel talked to a nonbinary ace person, a sexologist, and two poly people (one of whom may have also been bi) about allonormativity, amatonormativity, and gender normativity. Even if those terms weren't used in the episode itself.

It's hard to even explain how happy it made me to see asexuality discussed in such an affirmative way on Finnish TV. Axel had even deduced on his own that the estimate of 1% of the world's population being ace was probably an understatement, which the sexologist and ace person confirmed for him. As someone who only discovered my aceness in my thirties, I really appreciated that being covered.

But perhaps even more than the ace side of things, I loved how Axel genuinely seemed to listen to his guests and wanted to learn from them.

"I'm starting to see how privileged I actually am as a straight man. Nobody questions me. Life is an open motorway before me. All I need to do is drive on; I won't be stopped at any red lights. Eri for example has to explain themself in several respects, basically every day. It's strong [of them] to be up to having that discussion every time."

This lesson on privilege clearly wasn't one Axel just learned for the show and forgot. He also repeated it in interviews conducted after his first book came out, such as the Efter nio clip linked at the top of this post and an interview with his alma mater's student paper.

Speaking of his first book, it's a short story collection with masculinity as the overarching theme. It's titled Klein; a dialectal variant of the word klen (meaning frail, weak, feeble or delicate), used to disparage men who don't conform to normative masculinity.

The interview in the student paper is by far not the only one where Axel has talked about how strict social norms weigh people down and how it should be okay for a man to be kle(i)n, but these snippets from said interview are still pretty illustrative.

In his stories, he examines behaviours connected to masculinity. Competition, rivalry and lifting oneself up by putting others down are some of the things Åhman highlights as problematic. [--] Åhman thinks there are definitely problematic sides to masculinity, and that a certain culture of machismo is still alive today.

"I think confidence has a lot to do with being a man. We are taught that we are allowed to take space, and nobody questions us when we do. We men are allowed to be more visible and audible." Åhman says he wasn't particularly good at playing instruments or singing when he first got on stage, but he still had the nerve to get up there and perform. He believes the bar is higher for girls to make it on to the stage than it is for boys. "It's stupid to raise a child into a specific gender role. I hope increased awareness can help solve that problem in the future."

When asked what he thinks of the phrase 'Boys will be boys', he says he finds it incredibly problematic. Boys are more seldom held accountable for their actions, and society makes excuses for them.

This thread of highlighting problematic aspects of masculinity doesn't end with Axel's book authorship, either. It even extends to the workplace comedy series Halln, which he wrote with Joel Rönn (and in which Jakob from KAJ starred alongside Joel).

The two guys vying for power at the company are both sexist in their own ways. Joel's character (Mikael) acts very overtly and anciently sexist, often treats graphic designer Emilia like his personal assistant, has even put up a "girl calendar" in the break room.

Next to Mikael, Jakob's character (Jona) seems like a very sweet and modern man, which he in many ways is! Yet he still doesn't listen to Emilia after asking her impressions on what could be improved at the company. He latches on to her mention of a ping pong table because he used to be a ping pong champion, but he completely disregards her wishes. When a romance develops between them, he decides that they will move together to his father's villa in Spain - and when she asks what she's supposed to do there, he says she can just chill by the pool until he comes home from work (!).

"Let me ask you this: where do you see yourself in five years?" "I don't know." "Exactly. You don't know. Do you know where I see you?" "Well?" "In Spain, with me."

There is simply no way Axel didn't have a hand in writing Jona like this. I can't wait to see what happens and whether the character experiences any growth if the show gets a second season.

And although I said at the start that this would be about Axel in other roles, I do have to end this appreciation post on a KAJ note. Namely, I watched an interview today that I hadn't seen before, where the host asked Axel, what message would KAJ stand for if they had to get political?

Axel answered that they already sort of did that with Gambämark. They started writing it in 2017, when a musical about a conservative village that walls itself off from the world felt very topical and political. They wanted to advocate for a more open [inclusive] society and "letting all the flowers bloom", so to speak.

To the question "are you feminists?", he replied, "Yes, I think so. We think so, even as we are three men and sometimes wonder if we would have got the same opportunities if we were three women."

#kaj #axel åhman #appreciation post #not yr

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fiahtheteaaddict · 15 days ago

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"The Overthinker and The Overexplainer” snippet of part 2

Part 1: The Overthinker and The Overexplainer

F!Reader x Xaden Riorson

Content warning: reassurance (xaden being a reassurance king), mentions of anxiety and overthinking (js a quick note. This is only how part of my issue with overthinking and how my anxiety is. It’s part of MY experience with both). Insecurities and being self conscious (ig those are warnings too idk?) do lmk if there are any others that you see that I have missed!!

"I don't know what you want me to say... that I'm anxious? That I don't feel like I'm enough for anyone? That you are too good for me? That Im scared one day you will leave me thinking I am too much for you to handle?"

He looks into your eyes and sighs softly before making his way over to your bed and taking a seat on the bed. He pats the space next to him, “Come sit.”

You take a seat, shrinking into yourself a bit and start to scratch at the side of your thumb as you start to feel more and more anxious, nervous for his response to your outburst. He takes one hand into his, rubbing his thumb against the back of your hand. “I will never leave you... not now, not ever.” He lifts your chin softly so you are looking up at him. “You are the best and most beautiful thing to ever happen to me. You will never be too much for me to 'handle', you will always be enough, and I am far from too good for you. You are the best part of me. Hell you ask anyone if your good for me and they will tell you you are. Because you truly are. I will never leave you, do you understand me love?”

You nod softly, still trying to wrap your head around the fact that he doesn't think you are too much for him to "handle" as he says. You knew that a lot of people would tell you that you were good for him, that he was better with you. Hell those were their exact words. But you just couldn't wrap your head around the idea. That a such a strong and powerful rider, who was simply perfect in your, and many others' eyes, who was a damn legend, needed... you? It just made no sense at all.

"If you don't want to talk about this I understand but... how? How do you have so much love for me, again, I know we have had this conversation before and I am so sorry for bringing this up again and again, I am just truly at a loss. How Xaden? How?"

Xaden sighs softly, still rubbing his thumb over your hand as he speaks "love, I'm never going to grow tired of having this conversation with you. I am never gonna get tired of having the 'I need reassurance' talk. I understand, and I will explain to you a thousand times over."

#fourth wing #fourth wing x reader #writers #xaden riorson x reader #writing #xaden riorson #fourth wing xaden #xaden x reader #xaden x you #fourth wing imagine #fourth wing x you #fourth wing fic

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muffinsin · 10 days ago

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umm hi perhaps afab gender neutral reader x Donna, where she makes them work the day with a toy inside (maybe as a punishment or for fun idk)

(also i love your writing! it’s so good 🙏)

A rare Donna post, but a fun one! Have this little dom! Donna snippet👀😙 Hi there, hon! :) 👋 what a fun Donna prompt! I’m happy to hear you’re liking my work, thank you :)

Masterlists

The workshop rests silent, save for the faint creak of old, wooden floorboards and the quiet, barely-even-there methodical hum of the pink toy buried deep inside of you, certainly one of the most colorful things in the house, and the reason for your trembling knees and hitched breath.

It's buzzing gently and quietly now, set low- for the time being- but you know better than to think of that as mercy. Not with Donna, and certainly not after the way you mouthed off earlier, believing it wise to test her seemingly never ending patience.

Ah, but you did find there was an end to it, and she made sure to wipe the cocky little smile from you and dull the defiant spark in your eye.

Now, you reap the consequences of your earlier brattiness, sat on your knees on the cool, wooden floor in her workshop. Your hands tremble as you refold antique cloth and organize a variety of fabrics into specific boxes. It isn't difficult, and the work itself are certainly not the issue.

Instead, it's those damned vibrations making you shiver and gasp, and feeling her dark eye on you. You know she's watching you from behind you as she works. Silent. Dominating. Enjoying every pathetic little shiver down your spine you foolishly try to suppress. Your pussy clenches helplessly around the toy buried deep in you, squelching wetly with every little shift of your hips.

The toy pulses again, stronger, deeper. Your breath catches and before you know and can work on preventing it, a small, hot sound escapes you, slipping past your lips before you can think to stop it. You clutch the black cloth between your fingers, soft as velvet, tight, as though it might anchor you to the floor. Your pussy tenses up, squeezing the toy inside and making the vibrations all the more distracting.

You whimper softly, gasping as you hear your girlfriend chuckle lowly, quietly, below her breath.

"Still so loud...", she hums, not bothering to raise her tone. Her voice is dipped in honey- measured, steady, with her usual quiet edge that makes your stomach twist with desire tighter than the toy ever could. Although, it's certainly doing a good job making you all the more responsive to her...

"Did I not tell you to keep quiet, love?", she murmurs, not allowing the amusement she feels to flow into her voice. She sits behind you, watching you, watching every adorable little tremble of your body. Sometimes, you press your thighs together, which she finds adorable, as though it would stop the pleasure, as though it might help.

You clench your jaw, eyes squeezing shut as you try to steady your breathing. "I'm... trying...", you gasp out eventually, feeling the toy buzz a little sharper in you, now. It all feels so intense, your body covered in goosebumps and nipples hard as little rocks. You feel almost as on fire, and hearing her chuckle lowly, you almost feel desperate to crawl to her and cum. You know though, it would be a grave error on your part, as the stinging pink ache on your ass reminds you. Donna does not reward brats. Even a cute one like you.

"Trying", she echoes with a faint little trace of amusement woven into her words. "How noble, little brat"

You hear the quiet creak of her chair as she stands, shiver as you hear her move so quietly, it's nearly soundless. Every soft footstep is measures- gentle, deliberate, quiet- until she stands behind you, looking down at your trembling, naked form.

"Is this what you wanted?", she continues, her low voice cool. Your breath hitches as you feel her, her gloved, strong fingers trailing across the back of your trembling shoulder and down your spine, unhurried.

"You act out, you speak back, show you have no manners. You disobey...", she whispers. You jolt as the toy turns up a little more, buzzing wildly in your pussy and tearing a gasp from your lips every few seconds. She smirks. "...and now, you're here. Helpless. Stuffed full. Made to behave since you can't manage on your own". She pauses, and the hum spikes sharply, drawing another sound from you.

You gasp, hips jerking forward helplessly. You can only clutch the fabric tighter, your fingers curling weakly into the velvet.

"You're dripping over my fine floor, little brat...", she hums.

You whimper, feeling lightheaded with pleasure.

"Ah-ah."

Her hand wraps lightly around the back of your neck, firm- controlling. Her touch alone makes your thighs tremble, the toy inside you sending shockwaves through your core with every little pulse. "Careful", she warns quietly. "Don't ruin the fabric. I have use for it yet"

Your breath stutters. You just barely manage to get out a nod as you loosen your grip a little, your hands trembling as you set the fabric down and pick up the next to organize it. Your cheeks burn as she leans down closer, her hot breath tickling your ear and cheek.

"If only you handled your discipline as well as this task, my darling. Maybe, there's hope for you yet", she hums, chuckling lowly when the toy begins buzzing in a new, wilder rhythm. You try to move, to shift away from the pulse deep inside of you, but her hand on your neck tightens just slightly. Warning you. Telling you to be good, now. You can only whimper, your body flushed pink with warmth, your hands trembling and toes curling a little.

"Don't fidget", she warns. "You wanted attention, did you not? Now you'll have it on my terms"

You nod frantically, biting your lip hard. You're not sure what you're agreeing to, finding yourself easily getting lost in the pleasure. The vibration surges within you, a cruel, punishing rhythm that hits deep inside of you with cruel precision. Your arms shake a under you. Before you know it, you slump toward, gasping, hips twitching as you try to resist the orgasm rapidly rising within you- burning, aching. so good.

But Donna only steps around you, cool and pristine, her tone perfectly even as she sees you squirm and gasp, your pussy drooling onto her floors, your body trembling as you try desperately to obey.

"You will finish all of it, just like this. I want them folded, stacked, and organized. I want what needs filing filed. I expect order, focus, and control, brat".

You nod almost feverishly, her words almost enough to drive you over the edge. You're gasping helplessly, tears building at the corner of your eyes as you attempt to stay good. Still, you gasp wildly when she bends down slightly and tilts your chin up with two gloved fingers.

Her eye is unreadable, her expression cool. Still, her voice is razor-sharp and quiet, enough for you to squirm and whine softly.

"Is something the matter, brat?"

You try to speak, but can only slur out little words and pleas, begging for mercy, begging her to take pity on you, pleading for forgiveness for your earlier behavior. It only has her smirk. No, Donna's forgiveness is earned. And, unfortunately for you, you look far too cute trembling on your knees for her, far too easy for the dollmaker to handle, to play with, to wind up like one of her dolls.

Your knees ache, but you barely even notice it. She pulls from you, chuckling as she moves to sit in front of you instead. For a little while, you manage to work, manage to do as she wants. But soon you shake again, the cloth slipping from your grasp. You feel lightheaded with pleasure, certain you could come easily if she just pushed a single finger into you now. Maybe, it's just what she wants, to wind you up so much you cry around her when the time comes, to make you squeal out an apology for your own brattiness when she is ready to accept one.

You feel like one of her dolls, managed, watched, controlled so easily, made to obey. She watches you carefully, seated like a dark, mysterious queen behind a kingdom of broken dolls. Her fingers are laced, gently tapping as she watches you. Her dark eye is always on you, on your cute, flushed face, on your hard little nipples, on your trembling hands, on your twitching hips. When you move a little and have to bend over to get the next fabric from the bottom of the now nearly empty box, you flush as she sucks in a sharp breath, seeing your drooling, aching pussy on full display before you settle down again.

The toy pulses inside you ruthlessly, a relentless rhythm she changes up just often enough to ensure you can never quite get used to it. You feel as though it melts your muscles, dulling your mind. Each throb sends a wave of arousal through your core and right to your most sensitive spots. You can barely think straight, can barely still remember with stack is for the silks and which is for the lace.

You doubt she will help you, or forgive a mistake.

You make a sound, barely a whimper. A little plea. Your eyes dare meet her dark one, your voice so quiet and breathy as you beg; "D-Donna...ple...ease. Can I h-have a...a break...?"

The words slip out, your body shaking.

The dollmaker doesn't respond immediately.

For a moment, you almost think she won't, think she almost doesn't grant your pathetic plea an answer.

Then, slowly, she stands.

The heels of her shoes strike the floor in soft, steady beats. The closer she gets, the more your body seems to tremble, spine tightening, thighs trembling, heartbeat roaring in your ears.

When she stops in front of you, you nearly don't dare look up, suddenly feeling overwhelmingly shy. Again, though, the woman doesn't give you much of a choice.

"Look at me", she demands, her voice low, but autoritative. Your head jerks up immediately, your eyes wide as you look at her. Her expression is neutral, so impossible to read she might as well wear the veil. It only makes you squirm more, desperate.

"A break?", she echoes, tilting her head a little with a small smile that has you feel even more flustered than you already do. "You want rest now, sweetheart?"

Your heart jumps, missing a beat. You nod shakily, licking your lips, your hips twitching helplessly- for her.

She raises her gloved hand, your breath catching as she gently slides her fingers back beneath your chin. You feel her make you look up more, tilting your head back until you look up at her, your trembling body arched slightly, head fully tilted up to her as though worshipping her.

"So dramatic...", she coos, almost amused. "All that squirming, all that whining", she murmurs. "And you haven't even done half the work yet, sweet brat. Do you believe you have earned a break?", she coos.

You open your lips to apologize, but she's faster. Her fingers press in, higher, gliding past your lips. Two of them push inside, smooth, gloved, elegant. You gasp around them, your eyes wide as the taste of leather fills your mouth. She doesn't force them in deep, isn't rough with you. But she doesn't need to be. Her fingers curl ever so slightly against your warm tongue.

"Suck", she commands, simply.

The toy inside you surges at the command, cruel, too perfectly timed to be a coincidence, and your knees wobble helplessly. A breathy moan bubbles up in your throat, but you can't speak nor plea- not with her fingers there, not with the pleasure building up again so fast it nearly causes you to break.

You wrap your fingers around her properly, cheeks hollowing slightly as you suck them in deeper, choking on your own desperation and neediness. You're shivering, moaning around her fingers like they're something else, your eyes slipping shut and cheeks dusted bright pink. She watches you, unmoving, breathing slow and even.

"Good little thing", she whispers, pushing in deeper, slow and steady.

The fabric of her gloves drags across your warm tongue, slick with your split now. Her fingers press gently against the back of your throat, demanding your eyes to flutter open again to look at her when she speaks.

"You think a little brat gets to ask for breaks during their punishment?", she breathes. You moan lowly around her fingers, tongue caressing them. "You're not here to be comfortable, love", she hums. You moan again, eyes fluttering. You feel her press down a little more.

"You're here...", she continues, twisting her wrist just slightly, "to be used, brat"

You almost whine when she pulls her fingers out again, slow, dragging across your lips with a slick, wet pop!. She traces the wet glove along your cheek, almost playful, and you gasp as the toy hums a little sharper again, each short, rough pulse enough to make your legs twitch violently beneath you.

"You will take very minute of this and complete every task", she speaks, voice like velvet wrapping around iron. "And if I see you slack one more time, I will need to prolong your punishment"

You shiver as she glances at your unfinished work, smirking gently.

"Start folding. Properly, this time"

#donna beneviento #resident evil village #re8 village #angie beneviento #donna you evil woman😙#donna benevento x reader #writer’s block go brr

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