#Less active comforting and more like.. idk
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lazylittledragon · 1 year ago
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isn't it weird how if you get up at 7 or 8, do your work all day, then have free time and go to bed at 11 that's absolutely fine
but if i said i get up at 10, do fun stuff in the morning then work in the evening and go to bed late, i could be called lazy, nevermind that i'm getting just as much or MORE work done as i would in a traditional work day
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ohsweetflips · 5 months ago
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somewhere on this blog there is a post that goes something like "what if i just start identifying as nonbinary and don't tell anyone and still go by she/her" and that needs to be marked as the day that pandora's box opened
#ik it's my blog etc etc etc but i do try to not sad post often anymore just bc after a while#it becomes a lot akjdsjkdjk#however. this is also the closest i have to an unfiltered diary. so!#idk man ik (im pretty sure) rapid onset dysphoria is a thing or something but like#edit: the most rudimentary of google searches show that this may or may not actually be what i mean but like. 20% effort went into that#the magnitude of bad i have felt in the past week is kinda wild to me#like ive been feeling stuff softly like that for a while now w/ an increase come september#for like. reasons that ik but also reasons that dont necessarily matter rn#but it's like. less a realization and more so steps of becoming more comfortable/feeling more secure#but in that security i essentially run into a brick wall#like i joke abt whatever post i made years ago but it's like#lowk this feels like what i was worried abt this happening LMAO#like this idea of things kinda actualizing in my mind for me#but the actual capability of what i can do feeling limited#like. i have no clue what transitioning would/could necessarily look like for me#but it's starting to feel very much like: whatever it is won't happen#which ik is like. bad queer mindset 1#and then i am falling to bad queer mindset 2 of like. feeling bad that this took so long#and that i didnt put together stuff. or try more. earlier.#and that i've now like. run out of time. which ik is not true so like.#the self-awareness is here! i'm also just stubborn lmao#and like idk currently i'm just in the hell of not wanting to do the middle stuff#i just want to wake up one morning and be different AKJDFKJFDKJFD#anyways! i swear im not actively trying to spiral like every day this week#just my mental constitution is weak and susceptible to demons. and also anxiety and sadness LMAO#and as me and my roommate say. it's never too early for the guilt spiral.#also the pandora's box technically opened when i was like 15 but.#we put a lid on that and then everything came back worse when i was like. idk 19/20.
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tentglitch · 23 days ago
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I'm crashing tf out grandson
#luka.txt#vent#stuck between feeling guilty and annoying when I vent#and needing to vent so bad I feel like I'm gonna explode#like agh I don't want to be this gloomy inconvenience but also just keeping things to myself is agonizing#idk I'm more introverted and awkward but I do genuinely enjoy talking to people#and circling back to just feeling very lonely#but I'm so fucking sad all the time and just so reserved from past issues I don't feel like an interesting person#and I can't talk to people abt my struggles with this because it just feels like I'm guilt tripping them into being comforting and friendly#so I'm just alone and dying because I would rather suffer than even potentially bother someone#idk my fucking mood has been fluctuating like crazy but last couple days/week have been pretty bad#when the bipolar disorder makes you bipolar#how much are meds supposed to help because this shit feels impossible like when I'm entering a depressive episode everything is so bad#prob doesn't help that I'm having to attend therapy less frequently and also have postponed my med check twice now#I'm ngl part of it's because I don't wanna go like it does not feel like a judgement free space#idk how to explain it really but like I think a part of why I struggle to open up is fear of being judged#and it's just the way she talks and questions me idk it makes me uncomfortable even though I know breaking down these walls is going to#so maybe she's just doing her job idk#I lost the plot but I'm tired of talking so that's it for now#I'm curious if anyone actually ever reads these or if they just get swept through the void#idk which I'd prefer#I am so caught up in how I am percieved I cannot experience the joys of living 🥲#I hate it!! make it stop!!#my therapist has been trying to get me to be more understanding and gentle w/ these parts though#it is very hard because I'm just frustrated and sad but I'm trying#it's so easy to despise though because like I just want to be normal and happy why is this so hard#urgh I have to stop talking I'm gonna die#I haven't been that active lately due to this and a multitude of other things so uh idk when I'll be back again#I'll try to do less vent posts sorgy
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suswous · 7 months ago
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I know that, especially if it’s strangers, safety is also a big part of the concern, but I feel like a lot of (cis) women would be more comfortable sleeping in mixed gender rooms/rooms potentially with a bunch of cis guys if there was the requirement that you gotta promise to be cool about periods.
#thinking abt how when we went to Essen we booked a bunch of hostel rooms#and the way it worked out I was staying w/ 3 guys (in a 6 bed room) w/ I was totally fine w/#(all cis to my knowledge—and this is a fairly queer/trans club so ppl tbf to be more open)#which I’ll be honest earlier I had thought I’d try to get a room w/ more women but I actually didn’t rlly care#and of course the fact that I trusted most ppl in that club and those guys overall#(tbf one of them I just trusted in so far as he seemed fine but the other one’s I actively knew and trusted and given it’s the same room#that’s definitely enough)#but I wonder if I would’ve been less comfortable if I were on my period#like they wouldn’t be dicks abt it#but I think I would still feel that awkwardness/duty to hide it#and that’s why I think it’s specifically important that it’s like an affirmative agreement to be cool#bcs like yeah maybe if I mentioned having a period they would like try to be cool abt it but they wouldn’t expect it#but if it’s like affirmatively agreed to that they understand the risks and that they expect to hear abt periods/other stuff#maybe cis women would feel more comfortable#(Idk abt non-cis ppl who have periods bcs I can’t speak for how that would affect things)#(also I think this is mostly a problem for cis guys bcs a.obvs men (&nbs) who have/have had periods know what it’s like#&b. I feel like if you’re trans (or gnc but cis to some extent too) you learn to be cool w/shit#or at least just there’s not that societal expectation that you need to be kept from the knowledge of periods)#(also obvs anyone who uses women’s public restrooms is gonna get used to periods whether they have ‘em or not lol)
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kuiinncedes · 1 month ago
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:p
#bro i started the g/reat big beautifuI life audio book on spotify which i already kinda feel iffy abt bc i doubt spotify is like#great on the business side for having audiobooks there :|#(but idk anywhere else i can get it this month anywhere else besides buying it and im not doing that LMAO)#and i only decided to because the book club for my apt building is reading that this month#even tho the book club isnt even meeting in person anymore lol but i was kinda like might as well#but also im already going into it being like i dont rly want to read this LOL TT#im trying to be open minded and its not like the first chapter was incredibly bad or anything to me it's just i'm in a fantasy mood rn#i also havent read any adult contemporary romance and i just wnet to log it on storygraph and fable and i just saw it says its spicy lmao :#idk why i didnt like assume it was . bc of what seems to be the Thing rn being romantasy and romance and stuff#and emiIy henry being so popular i know for romance books#which is all fine. it's just not for me so i have even less interest in reading it now tho lol TT#sigh. idk. i listened to 20 mins of it i could keep going#i also think i def have a bit of like overexposure bias or whatever like bc it's soooo popular im like :|#not that i rly know anything abt emiIy henrys books i just see them on every book ig reel i see lmao#ok this is also like . abt me identifying as aroace but also not being fully 100% 'comfortable' w that yet idk#im comfortable w it in that i dont ever think abt romance and shit and my friends never talk abt it either so its like irrelevant to my lif#but the fact that these romance focused things r sooooo popular and like whenever it does come up it makes me wonder#if im just closing myself off by identifying as aroace and i dont actually know bc ive never experienced it#even w smut and stuff i just dont rly want to read it so i literally never do i mostly come across in fic and i just scroll thru it#so sometimes im like idk if it's just avoidance yk instead of actually being aroace bro y are there SO MANY FRUIT FLIES IN MY FAMILYS HOUSE#idk what my point here is LMFAO maybe i should just go reread loveless and dear wendy :D#anyway we'll see maybe i'll look up how spicy the book is like more specifically#im honestly totally fine w not reading it for this book club too like again the book club is . barely active ppl dont even show up in perso#so they cancelled the inp erson part LMFAO but it would be nice to talk abt smth w ppl who go to the other events and virtually on fable#ig also a part of this weird internal conflict is bc of how popular these types of books r it makes me feel like i shud be interested#when i am not interested in that lol at least not rn#maybe i should just go upstairs and get into the invisibIe life of addie Iarue which is waiting on my bedroom floor lol#or six of c/rows . which i am eyeing for a reread :| even tho i need to read physical tbr books or the new authors im getting into#i shouldnt force myself to read gbbI if im not interested....... i'll listen to the second chapter now ig idk its whatever we will see lol#jeanne talks
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goldenstring6123 · 11 months ago
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Lnds: The boys as parents
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Warning: Long post ahead! 3.7K words in total! reader is MC! f!reader, AFAB!reader, implied abortion
Author's note: I went a little too overboard and specific with this one... IDK if you guys will like it. Might make a part 2/Individual fics it this post does well!
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Zayne as a father:
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He became a parent to 2 kids, both adopted. The eldest is a boy, and the youngest is a girl.
After a life-threatening complication when you were pregnant (it involved the problem in your heart, you and your husband decided to adopt instead. The first was a 4-year-old boy and, later on, a 2-year-old girl from an island near Linkon City.
Zayne works hard as a chief surgeon; even then, the pay at AKSO Hospital is no joke. Despite preparing more than enough money to live comfortably with a child, something within him fueled his desire to do better: before you got married, he worked hard to become a part of the Hospital's board of directors. This allowed him to control his time more and spend fewer hours working.
When you and Zayne adopted your first boy, a 4-year-old named Elias, you met him as a quiet little boy which you found working hard to try and read an outdated newspaper on the island. A few months later, you discovered your now-son's interests in academics and learning. Zayne was pleasantly surprised to see his little boy eager to learn about things outside of the island, so much so that the chief surgeon almost immediately registered him to enter formal schooling.
Most people would assume that, like himself, he expected his son to achieve great things in school, but on some school nights, before bedtime, Zayne would talk to your son. "You're doing well in school, Elias. But don't forget to have fun." You thought Zayne would never really have time to visit your son's plays and school activities. Still, much to your surprise, he was there for most of it, especially in events where your son is involved. It was such a comedic sight watching your husband hold a noncellular camera.
Being a part of the hospital board of directors meant long and lengthy meetings, so there were times when he still had to work late and leave beyond working hours. Sometimes, you let your son stay up and accompany you to pick up your husband. Of course, that's also to buy a hotpot for a midnight snack on the way. There were also times when you and your son would fall asleep on the couch waiting for him. He quickly picks you up and places you on his bed, tucking you and himself five minutes later. The next thing you know, it's morning, and the smell of waffles is wafting in the air.
He wasn't outwardly affectionate, but it's more than evident that he loves his son. He praises him to his colleagues (unknowingly), and he gives him gifts, and the cost doesn't matter. But sometimes, he shows love to his child through words, Complimenting his son's actions and skills.
He rarely scolds his son as he's the less strict parent. Your dynamic is the type where if you don't allow your son to go do something, he'll call his dad for backup. You almost always give in. Zayne never really puts his hand on his son. Instead, he opts for a more, face-the-consequence-of-your-actions type of dad. He lets his son be and ensures Elias learns that there are things he can't and shouldn't do. On more bad days, when your son is extremely hard-headed, Zayne will tell him what to do.
A few years later, despite many ups and downs, both of you decided to adopt from the same island again. It was a year-old infant named Penelope who was handed to the orphanage due to the death of her mother.
Between the two of you, Zayne was the one who fell in love first. He never expected to be a girl dad, and he didn't think too much of it until he saw her in your arms. The first thing she did was grab his finger and giggle, looking so beautiful against the island's sunset.
When she grew a bit older, Zayne became fond of how she began to resemble you in terms of actions and personality. She was undoubtedly the type of kid to make a fuss about the little things and act cunningly to get her way and, at the same time, not cry over the things that made her sad or hurt her.
She was often seen with you and clinging to you if not Elias. With her, things were an unspoken competition between Elias and Zayne. He was her first in many things: first dance, first time riding a bike, and first parent to be called by her, except for the first kiss. Her first kiss was given to his older brother, and it was on the forehead. Zayne sulked for the rest of the day while your son held that against him, stating that his little sister loves him more than his dad.
Despite this, Zayne and Elias developed another thing, an unspoken urge to protect the little girl. It may not seem like it, but Elias always focuses on Penelope, ensuring she's doing alright in school and having fun. Zayne sometimes sneaks into the daycare to peek at her daughter's condition. On Zayne's day off, Elias would tell stories about what Penelope does on a day-to-day basis. Thanks to his son, he was well-versed in her daughter's life events despite working a lot in the Hospital.
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Xavier as a father:
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Xavier is a father to one male child.
It was an unplanned pregnancy, which you only realized when you had your Quarterly checkup at headquarters. The doctor ruled you unfit to work on the field because you were carrying a month-old baby. You gagged at the news, and on the same day, you told Xavier. He just stared at you and turned red.
Xavier was…enthusiastic(?) with your pregnancy. Despite being the type not to really change when you were pregnant, he was always on guard and on your beck and call, buying out whatever cravings you had, even at midnight or on a rainy day (He was the one having cravings; You settled with whatever food you had in the house.)
While you were at home resting with him, you observed his behavior change. He was more silent than usual, looking out of the window; when you asked, he told you that his having a child felt like a fever dream. Xavier was unprepared to be a father but willing to learn. His trove of light novels and comic books slowly began to be invaded by parent magazines and guidebooks on caring for an infant. If he has some day off, he will be by your side to help you do stuff around the house or attend parenting classes behind your back.
When you gave birth, even through the amniotic fluid and white stuff covering the child, you could easily see that he was a pure carbon copy of Xavier. There was no part of the little baby that resembled you at all. Both in physical appearance and in attitude. Xavier cried tears of joy upon seeing your child born, albeit he never showed anyone his crying face. You know he did because his eyes and nose were puffier than usual.
The baby was quiet; it coos, plays with its saliva, and asks for a lot of milk, but I rarely cry. The only time it cries is if a loud sound is disturbing it from sleeping. And even when he cries, gently tapping and lulling him within five minutes will stop the little guy from crying.
The baby was attached to him. The baby would unknowingly leer towards him whenever he was around, asking to be picked up, to which Xavier would happily do so. He was a sleepy child and liked to nap even in broad daylight. He was easily fed and didn't put up much of a fight, even in his older years.
At the age of three, it was the beginning period where his little meek personality began to change. The kid was adventurous and the curious type. He was often found in his own world observing the little things in life, like a trail of ants or a kitten atop a tree branch, yet it seemed like he was curious to learn more things. He liked to observe from up close, which is why he was often seen on tiptoes trying to look over a lot of stuff or squatting down to observe the smaller insects on the ground.
To help him foster his talents and strengths, Xavier brings him to the headquarters once a week to let him run around and train. You were against it initially, but seeing your little boy imitate his father with clumsy focus made your heart swoon. A few years later. The kid was in school; Xavier was the one who attended the boy's school activities as you had to work most of the time, leading a team of your own.
He was doing well compared to the average students in school. Still, the teacher complained that the little boy kept sleeping in class, often getting him scolded and demerit. Xavier scratched his head and apologized, saying the little boy must've been exhausted after midnight play-dates with him.
Xavier keeps physical albums in his home, one for the family, one for you and him, and one dedicated to your child's life. Much to your surprise, he was more hands-on with his child than you might expect. Xavier never lets you carry your son for too long; he's afraid that you would collapse from exhaustion. He'd also be the one to put him to sleep, almost always falling asleep with his own son.
He's not the type to gift his child physical things (he still does occasionally). He would prefer to take you guys out to different locations, like a new arcade, a new park, or a place where your son could explore freely and safely. Xavier adores his child and keeps a photo of him on his lock screen. On his desk is a family picture of you and him that you take every year.
Xavier was the favorite parent when the little boy grew up because he was calmer, more collected, and the cooler one between you two. It's not that you weren't, but you know how boys are. Xavier tells his son many stories that he passes off as "fairytales" when, in reality, it was actually his real adventures in the decades he has lived and worked. But his favorite ones were when he and you fought against the wanderers side to side.
Needless to say, Xavier was a role model and a doting father. Because his appearance never really changed, at some point in the far future, he would be mistaken as the little boy's twin brother instead. It became a running joke in your family, so much so that out of pity, your son decided to dye his hair a different color to make him distinguishable.
Xavier and your son continued to have a boss and subordinate relationship in the hunter's association, which a lot of people really admired. On the other hand, you ran the bigger team and were on the field most of the time. Memories of regular days are filled with seeing each other in the medical Bay, on the field, or in a restaurant after a long fight on the field.
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Rafayel as a father:
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Father to two girls.
Rafayel's baby was not planned. In fact, he never believed you were pregnant until he saw signs of your body changing, especially the morning sickness and cravings. It's not that he didn't want to be a father, but it was simply too sudden for him, and he couldn't absorb it well.
He went a little overboard in preparation, hoarding many little clothes that your child would definitely outgrow. He brags about your pregnancy to many people, saying he's excited to be a father and always wanted a family of his own. People congratulate you a lot, even if you don't know who they are. On random days, you keep getting mail for some reason, and it's oversized packages: bassinets, branded feeding bottles, bottle steamers, and a box full of infant diapers. Safe to say, you really didn't need to buy a lot of things for your little passenger.
Unlike you, who was pretty lenient in designing the bedroom for your daughter, he was nit-picky as hell. The interior designer and suppliers had a hard time dealing with your husband, and you could only apologize secretly on his behalf. Nonetheless, the room turned out to be more beautiful than you expected.
When the baby arrived, he was crying, but he denied it. Yet everyone in the room could see him cry like a diva. Everyone wanted to see the baby, and so did your friends. Still, to your surprise, Rafayel refrained from letting anyone visit you for fear of the infant contracting any diseases from the visitors.
You decided to name her Anastasia. He was undeniably meant to be a girl dad. There was no day in the week when the little baby was dressed poorly. She would always wear on-brand clothes; even simple pajamas cost more than they should. He bought her dolls, stuffed toys, and those big dollhouses collectors buy.
When the little baby girl grew up and began to attend school, Rafayel would always ask for a kiss on the cheek, which your daughter would happily give.
Rafayel likes to gossip with you and your daughter, and he is a good source of news because he always knows the juicier side of stories. With your daughter, he knows the reputation of each and every parent. Sometimes, they go too far and pick on your daughter's classmates, e.g., telling them that their clothes are old-fashioned or that one kid looks like a mean bully. The bad thing is, your daughter thinks so as well. You and Rafayel once went to her sports day competition and saw her play a three-legged race partnered with a boy. You could see the smoke coming out of Rafayel's head, and you had to cover his mouth because he was uttering profanities. Something like: "Get your hands off my daughter, you little…"
Raf likes to give gifts as a sign of affection, and your daughter is thankful, but on special days, she doesn't request anything. Instead, she insists on having a dad-daughter date instead. Thanks to those moments, Raf began to lean more towards spending time together rather than showering her with gifts.
She grew up replicating Rafayel's diva-ness as her form of humor, and she usually tries to get away with stuff using that method. But she was family-oriented, being the type to show affection outwardly. She most definitely became a daddy's girl and would always go to him for help.
Later on, when your first child reached her teen years, you decided to have another child, and this time, it was a girl whom you named Charlotte. Rafayel was more tamed with the room decoration this time, but not with the gifts and outfits. He didn't allow any secondhand items from Anastasia to be given to the younger one.
Rafayel, despite already being a seasoned dad, was more overprotective with his second daughter, hiring a nanny for her. He would be restless if he didn't manage to see her for two days, so he refrained from going out of town unless necessary. If he did, however, he would always call you and ask how Charlotte was doing. You would turn the phone to your daughter, but she wouldn't pay him any mind and continue coloring in her little notebook.
Unlike Anastasia, Charlotte preferred to be with you. She was the more reserved of the two siblings, but she was mature for her age. She knew what she wanted and would outwardly deny if whatever she was doing or receiving was not to her liking. She wasn't that dramatic and would just stare at her sister or father whenever they exaggerated their emotions in front of her.
Sometimes, you and Charlotte just like to watch your other daughter and your husband act all dramatic. Then you just brush them off and spend your day drinking tea and eating cupcakes.
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Sylus as a father
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Sylus is the father of twins. One boy, one girl.
You weren't married when you found out you were pregnant; you were his lover by then, but you were severely unprepared to have children, considering the environment you guys were in. You got married in secret, and he made a promise to protect you and your children despite living in the N109 zone.
Upon the birth of your children, he was mainly on edge. He got you the best doctors and midwives. Although your birth was surprisingly smooth sailing, you heard some stories from the nurses nearby about how Sylus was threatening a doctor if you ended up with complications. Thankfully, the twins were delivered safely.
Between the twins, the eldest is a girl you named Mauve, and the boy, Claude. Mauve had your eyes, but his hair color was daunting, and he had a more pale skin tone, while Claude resembled you more than Sylus, except for his eyes.
Sylus didn't care much for the children; he made that apparent by focusing more on you and his work and leaving the kids to the nanny. That quickly changed after six months. On a random day, he saw you tending to your children, both sleeping soundly in your arms. You seemed at peace inside the bedroom, looking out into the distance. Something switched inside of Sylus, which neither of you can point out, but there was one thing for sure: You guys were now a family.
The mindset change perplexed you the most because, beginning that day, Sylus made a quiet effort to learn how to take care of the twins. He was often seen with the nanny, asking for specific methods of washing the feeding bottles or bathing the twins. And in no less than a month, he was practically the one taking care of your children whenever he was at home.
Sylus doesn't spoil his children more than necessary. Sure, they had rooms of their own and a decent amount of toys, branded items, and clothes, but he only gave them a little more than necessary. He firmly believes that children should learn to work hard at an early age to not get disappointed in the future; you scolded him for that, though, after all, they were just children.
Sylus always plays with his children whenever he can. He doesn't like it when family time is interrupted by business, so he ensures no one disturbs the residence until you and the children have had enough fun. His play methods are surprisingly tame and even comedic; after all, the sight of Sylus dawning twin-tails and stickers on his face doesn't come by that often. On days when he's out of town, Luke and Kieran are the ones who play with the children, and not even they can withstand the dress-up and role-play.
Whenever things get complicated in the organization, or even a hint of danger lurks around the family, Sylus sends you and the children away to a residence under a different name. It was located on a more private island, which only his private jet could access. Then, he deals with the problem as swiftly as possible.
A few more years later, Sylus changed. His principle of hard work equals good rewards shifted, and he slowly began to spoil the twins. They were spoiled, but it was surprising that they were obedient. That is until you spied around them when you were supposed to be at work. It was thanks to this that you realized another thing: Sylus is the type of father who says, "I can't do anything, your mother said no. Sorry, kids." when you're around and "C'mon kids, who will scold you? Your mom is at work, and I'm the parent in charge!" when you're not.
Thanks to this, you also discovered the real nature of your children behind the nice, good children facade.
They were naughty: They liked to play pranks on your husband, but Sylus always outsmarts them. You constantly wondered where they were picking up these silly pranks until you saw them huddled together with Luke and Kieran in a random corner of the house.
The twins were cunning: They greeted guests with a smile and treated maids with care, but they sneaked around the staff room and reported to Sylus what they heard. Once, they broke a vase and convinced you that Mephisto did it.
They were eccentric: The smiles on their faces were business smiles whenever other people were around. Note they were smiling ear to ear, but their smile was unsettling once you realized that you had entered the house of Onichynus' leader. It was almost threatening even.
Sylus, despite not looking like it, valued education as he believed it could give his children an advantage. Still, he'd let his children be street-smart rather than book-smart. Because of this belief, he would bring his children around for business meetings and less dangerous missions. You once argued with him over the twins' safety. Still, they reassured you that they're more than capable of protecting themselves.
A few years later, into adulthood, Claude was quietly regarded as a lethal weapon due to his proficiency in engineering (nuclear & Chemical) and in statistics; His background and frightening loyalty to his father and Onychinus amplified the organization's fearsome reputation.
On the other hand, Mauve was the front of Onychinus, often leaving the country to make business deals on behalf of his father, who was busy working at home. The woman was responsible. She was undoubtedly a gambler who believed high stakes = high rewards, yet she had never once lost that gamble.
But when you and your family get together for dinner every week, it's like they're the most mundane family ever, talking about what they hear out on the street and what the new neighbors are up to or what new places to visit in Linkon City. You just…came to accept it.
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Author's footnotes: Alright this post is too long for my own liking but it would be longer if I go in depth about your family details. and at this point, this is like an AU... Layout by me, using canva premium | Do not repost |
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incognit0slut · 1 year ago
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REFLECTED BLISS
When you discover a mirror attached to the wall in your hotel room, Spencer decides to take full advantage of it.
Warnings: (18+ MDNI) afab reader, established relationship but they're being sneaky, fingering, guided masturbation (f), unprotected sex with a mirror involved, creampie, and spencer being spencer a.k.a he uses fun facts as dirty talk ~3.9k words A/n: Told myself to make this 'cute and sexy and less filthy' but… idk man, from a scale to 1 to 10 how filthy is this be honest Requested: Here
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“Oh my god.”
“What? What is it?”
“Spence,” you urged, pulling him into the room. “You need to see this.”
He followed you, stepping further in, and his eyes widened as they landed on the wall opposite the bed—a wall that wasn't just a wall, but a vast, floor-to-ceiling mirror reflecting the entire room. “That’s… interesting.”
“Interesting?” You mocked before peaking your head out the door, making sure no one was in sight before clicking it shut. “It’s terrifying.”
His duffel bag hit the carpet floor. “You’re scared of a mirror?”
“No,” you responded, placing your own bag alongside his. “I’m scared of the idea of it. I mean, look at it—it’s like it sees everything.” 
“It’s glass. It can’t actually see us.”
“Yeah, but still,” you said, crossing your arms defensively. “It’s placed right in front of the bed. Who would want to watch themselves sleeping?”
His eyes shifted back and forth between the mirror and the bed, the reflection capturing every detail of the room, including the bed’s plush pillows and crisp white sheets. “You know, I don’t think it’s used for sleeping.”
“What do you mean?”
His lips quirked up into an amused smile. “Think about it. Why would anyone want a mirror like this in front of their bed? It’s not for sleeping, it’s for... well, other activities.”
You felt your cheeks heat up as realization dawned. “Oh, you mean—that’s even worse!”
He laughed, closing the distance between you, his arms resting comfortably around your waist. “Actually, visual stimulation can significantly enhance sexual experiences. Mirrors can add a whole new level of excitement by engaging our sense of sight.”
Your face flushed even more. “I… did not know that.”
“Yeah, it’s all about the brain processing the stimuli.” He pulled you closer, his voice dropping to a softer, more intimate tone. “It can heighten our arousal and make the experience more intense.”
You could feel your heart hammering against your chest, knowing what he was trying to do. Every time he initiated something intimate, it never failed to fluster you. There was a time when Spencer was uncertain and hesitant about these aspects of your relationship. But the more you spent time together, sneaking into each other’s hotel rooms from time to time, the more his confidence grew.
Now, you could feel it in the way he was holding you, his arms wrapped securely around your waist. His touch was firm yet gentle, and the way he looked down at you, his eyes filled with warmth and a hint of mischief, was sending you into a frenzy. There was something different in his gaze—a new assurance, a quiet strength that made your pulse quicken.
He smiled down at you, a secretive, knowing smile as if he held a secret of his own, one that he was eager to share with you in these private moments. You swallowed hard, trying to steady your breathing. 
“I guess that makes sense.”
His smile widened. “So, while the mirror might seem creepy at first, it actually has its perks.”
“Perks, huh?”
“Absolutely.”
You pulled back slightly, eyes narrowing at him. “Are you trying to convince me to have sex in front of the mirror?”
“Is it working?”
You couldn’t stop the laugh escaping your lips. “A little.”
He laughed along with you, the sound warm and infectious. “Can I convince you more?”
But before you could answer him, his lips were already down your neck, drawing a sigh from you. You tilted your head to grant him better access. His hands slid around your waist, pulling you closer until you could feel the steady beat of his heart against yours.
“I thought—” You let out a moan when he sucked a spot just below your ear. “I thought we agreed… no funny business tonight.”
“Was that really your plan when you begged me to stay with you?”
“I didn’t beg,” you defended. “You offered. I told you this town gave me the creeps and you said you’d sneak in my room to keep me company.”
His lips paused momentarily, hovering just over your pulse. 
“You’re right, you didn’t beg,” he conceded with a soft chuckle, his breath tickling your skin. “But you have to admit, the offer was mutually beneficial.”
“Mutually beneficial? Is that what we’re calling it?”
“It’s accurate,” he murmured, drawing back to look at you. “And I seem to remember someone saying how much they appreciated the company... especially at night.”
You could feel the smile forming on your lips, even as you tried to maintain a semblance of indignation. “Well, maybe I did say that. But that doesn’t mean—”
His lips cut you off, soft and persuasive, making it impossible to continue as your protests melted away. The kiss deepened, driven by a mixture of long-held desire and the thrill of his hard body pressed against your soft frame.
“You make a pretty convincing argument,” you murmured against his lips, your earlier resolve softening.
He pulled away from you before taking your hand in his. “Come here.”
He led you gently towards the mirror, the expanse of glass revealing your intertwined figures in the softly lit room.
“Oh my god, we’re actually doing this?”
He positioned you in front of him. "Only if you're comfortable.”
You watched your reflections, the way his hands settled more firmly around your waist, how your bodies fit together so perfectly. Your gaze met him through the mirror.
“Convince me more.”
He smiled and wrapped his arms around you, fingers hovering above the buttons of your shirt. 
“Well," he began. "Did you know that mirrors don't just reflect visuals? They can also amplify emotions.”
You watched him in the reflection, the depth of his clear, brown eyes pulling you deeper into the moment. "It's like being both the spectator and the participant," he continued, his fingers deftly beginning to unbutton your shirt with gentle precision. "It makes everything more real, more intimate.”
You found yourself nodding, drawn in by both his words and the tender yet confident way he handled you. 
"So," he concluded as he folded back the fabric, revealing more of you to the cool air of the room and the warm glow of his gaze, "If we're talking about enhancing our senses, using a mirror could make every touch, every kiss, feel even more intense, don't you think?"
Words failed you; you were too overwhelmed by his presence, by the heat that radiated from his touch, so instead of speaking, you nodded again. He smiled, a slow, knowing curve of his lips that suggested he was aware of the effect he had on you.
"See?" he murmured, slipping your shirt off your shoulders. "Everything feels more alive, doesn't it?"
More than alive, your body was burning. You couldn't tear your eyes away from the mirror, where every movement and touch vividly reflected back at you. You leaned into him, letting the warmth of his body envelop you as his lips found the curve of your neck, planting soft, lingering kisses.
His fingers slid down the strap of your bra, the motion slow and tantalizing as his gaze traced the path. His other hand remained at your waist, holding you steady as if he knew how his actions were making your knees weak. 
“Tell me what you’re thinking,” he urged when he caught you staring intently at your reflection.
"I'm thinking," you started. “That this mirror might be magic.”
His eyebrows raised slightly, amusement flickering through his gaze. "Oh?" 
“It’s making my clothes disappear.”
He laughed, the sound rich and warm in the quiet room. “I thought maybe I had something to do with that.”
“Well… you do love a good magic trick.”
“I do love a good magic trick.”
You felt his fingers on your back before he unhooked the clasp of your bra. The fabric loosened, and you felt a flush of warmth that had little to do with the room's temperature. His hands slid from your back to your shoulders, gently pushing the straps down your arms, allowing the fabric to slip away gracefully. 
“You’re so beautiful.”
You swallowed, trying to concentrate as his arms circled your waist before his fingers found the waistband of your pants.
“You’re… you’re pretty too.”
His chuckle was low and affectionate, his breath tickling your ear. "I'll take that as a compliment."
You felt his fingers undo the button of your pants, his movements slow, almost teasing, before he gently slid the zipper down. He gazed into your eyes through the mirror, seeking permission, and you found yourself nodding, your breath catching in your throat.
His hands shifted, not only guiding the fabric down your legs but also making sure your panties followed suit as he kneeled behind you. He let out a strained groan when he caught the evidence of your slick arousal clinging onto the fabric, momentarily pausing to kiss the back of your exposed thigh.
You were so pretty, so warm, so inviting. Spencer let his lips linger onto your skin while he pushed the last piece of clothing gently past your knees, allowing it to fall gracefully to the floor. He stood back up and led you both backward until the back of his knees met the edge of the bed.
With a smooth motion, he sat down, guiding you to sit between his spread legs. He carefully nudged your legs apart with his hand, and you couldn't resist looking away when you saw yourself in this position.
“No,” he said, his hand tracing along the column of your neck, coming to rest gently against your jaw before tilting your face toward the mirror. “I want you to watch.” 
Hesitantly, your eyes met your reflection in the mirror. You could clearly see yourself, how exposed you were, how you seemed to look smaller compared to him with the way you were naked and the way he was still fully clothed.
His hands traced a path from your jaw down your neck, and he watched himself move over the swells of your breasts. He gave them both a firm squeeze, admiring how they looked in his hands, how your skin radiated beneath his own. 
You gasped when his thumbs brushed your nipples. It seemed like it wasn’t much, but the sensation you were getting from it was making you wetter. Your nipples were so sensitive that you let out his name in an airy moan.
“Yes, baby?”
Your back arched instinctively. He knew what he was doing with his sweet, gentle voice and the way he was rolling your nipples in between his index and middle fingers.
You shifted your head to the side. “Can you kiss me?”
Of course he could, he’d probably give you anything you asked for. Spencer leaned forward, his lips met yours that melded with sweetness an intense longing. One of your hands found its way to his hair, pulling him closer as you kissed him with a clear desperation, but his hunger was unmatched.
He was kissing you as if he wanted to make sure he memorized every curve of your lip, the way your tongue felt, and how it felt good to get a moan out of you. You were moaning loudly, way too loud, and all he could do was swallow your moans—tongue exploring all over the inside of your mouth or press his lips hard against yours. 
Finally breaking the kiss just enough to speak, he whispered against your lips. “Should I continue?”
You nodded as his other hand, which had been skillfully teasing your nipples traveled down, tracing the lines of your body, over your ribs, pausing at your hips. He gently guided your hips to shift slightly, adjusting the angle, spreading your legs further apart.
“Can you keep your eyes on the mirror for me?”
You fixed your gaze on the reflection and felt a surge of heat rush through you. A glistening sheen of your arousal coated your inner thighs, and it almost embarrassed you, but it seemed like he didn’t mind. His large hands moved down your thighs, his touch alternating between gentle brushes and firm grips, exploring the softness of your flesh.
The moment his fingers made contact with the slick wetness, sliding effortlessly through your folds and parting them, a sharp gasp escaped your lips. The image in the mirror was boldly erotic, and he continued with practiced movements as he pushed you further into a haze of pleasure.
“Look at how responsive you are,” he murmured, his fingers rolling over your clit. "Visual stimulation can greatly enhance the physical sensations. Watching yourself like this, seeing how much you enjoy it, can intensify everything you feel."
Your stomach churned with a violent delight as he began to put more pressure, rubbing your swollen nub in a circular motion. You gasped, focusing on your reflection–your head tilting back, your eyes fluttering shut before snapping open again. It was intensely arousing to see yourself in such a raw, unguarded state.
"Watching can make the pleasure more acute," he continued, guiding your hand down to feel where his fingers were at work. "Try it."
Your eyes met his in the mirror. “W-What?”
“Here,” he encouraged, taking hold of your hand before placing it at the center of your cunt. The warmth and wetness were startling, even more so because you were witnessing it unfold in the mirror. His fingers guided yours, teaching you the rhythm and pressure that had drawn those sharp gasps from your lips.
"Like this," he murmured, his own hand adjusting yours, showing you how to circle and press. Your breath hitched, seeing the flush spread across your chest and neck, the way his fingers moved above yours.
"It intensifies, doesn't it?"
Your head fell back to his chest. “Y-Yes.”
“Keep going,” he instructed, and you followed, playing with your clit with the right amount of pressure you desired. When his fingers traveled further down, his fingertips grazing your entrance, your jaw slacked open.
You whimpered as he began to sink his digits into your cunt, savoring the way you clenched around him. Your eyes rolled at the back of your head before you instinctively closed your eyes. 
You felt his free hand gripping your jaw.
“Eyes on the mirror, Sweetheart.”
You obeyed, reopening your eyes. You settled to watch how his hand flexed as he began to slowly pump his finger in and out of your dripping cunt before adding another to stretch you out. You whined, your own fingers moving fast against your clit.
“Good,” he murmured, burying his face against the side of your neck, face nearly pressing into yours. His stubbled jaw scraped across your skin, causing you to shudder in pleasure. “Keep watching.”
You could barely think straight, your breaths coming in short gasps now, your focus split between the sensations rippling through your body and the erotic display in the mirror. His fingers curled inside you, finding that perfect angle to press against your most sensitive spot. 
The room was quickly filled with the lewd sound as he kept a steady pace, fingers rutting into your tight hole, your slick inner walls clenching around him with each thrust. Your hips jerked against him again as a tiny moan escaped your lips.
"I love seeing you like this," he confessed. "Are you close?”
You struggled to answer, your breaths coming in quick, shallow gasps. But he felt the way you clenched around him, a clear sign of your approaching orgasm. His other hand traced a path from just below your breasts, gliding down over the smooth plane of your stomach. He paused, his palm resting just above where your own fingers were playing with your clit, and applied pressure there.
A shudder tore through you, the sensation bordering on overwhelming before a sharp, involuntary whimper escaped your lips. Your body shook as your orgasm washed over you in an intense wave.
The mirror captured it all—the way your head tossed back against his shoulder, your eyes squeezed shut, then snapped open to catch glimpses of his fingers thrusting into your throbbing cunt while his other hand pressed gently on your lower stomach.
Your own movements paused as you tried to catch your breath and Spencer held you, making sure you composed yourself even though his erection was digging into the swell of your ass, itching to be inside of you. Fortunately, he had patience—you, on the other hand, not so much.
You gripped onto his thigh, noting the fabric underneath your palm. “You’re wearing too much clothes.”
Spencer chuckled softly, his breath warm against your ear. "Am I now?" 
"Definitely too much.”
"Maybe we should fix that," he suggested, shifting slightly to allow some space for you to turn in his arms. Your hands moved to the buttons of his shirt the moment you faced him, fingers itching to rid him of the unnecessary barrier.
He watched your every move with a slight smile playing on his lips. letting you push the fabric over his shoulder. “Better?”
"Getting there.”
You worked at the buckle of his belt before you unbuttoned his pants, urging him to lift his hips as you slid them off. "How about now?”
You reached out, your hands gliding up his now bare thighs.
"Almost. Still too much."
Spencer responded immediately, his hands removing the last piece of his clothing in a fluid motion. Then he was finally naked, and the sight of his cock, visibly aroused and gleaming slightly at the tip, drew a sharp intake of breath from you.
"Now we're talking," you breathed out, a satisfied grin spreading across your face.
His hands found their way to your waist, urging you to face the mirror again. “Get on your knees for me.”
“You’re really into this mirror thing, huh?"
“It’s hard not to,” he quipped, his hands gently guiding you into position as he settled behind you. "Don’t worry, all the attention is on you."
“Oh, really?” you responded, turning slightly to look up at him. "Or do you just like seeing how good you make me feel?”
“I do make you feel good, don’t I?”
“Cockiness does not suit you.”
“Mhm,” he hummed, gripping your hips with one hand and the other positioning himself right at your entrance. “Arch your back a little.”
You obliged, accentuating the curve of your body. “Like this?”
“Perfect.”
His hand on your hips adjusted you slightly, ensuring the angle was just right. You sucked in a sharp breath, feeling his cock brush past your folds and you both moaned as he pushed himself further into you. Once he was all the way in, pausing to take a breath, he slowly slid back out to give you an experimental thrust. 
You whined at the sensation before adjusting your knees, spreading them further apart to give him better access. This new position deepened the angle, and when he thrust back into you, the pleasure intensified.
"Is this better?" He asked breathlessly, watching your expressions in the mirror for any sign of discomfort or pleasure.
You nodded. Your face felt hot, your mind was fogging up. The feeling of being filled was too good, but you wanted something more. Your hips, as if you had no control over them, started to grind against his.
Spencer groaned in pleasure, head going blank. His hands rested on your waist, pulling back to slide himself out before going back in slowly, meeting your movement. But he was treating you as if you were fragile, his thrusts were gentle, and despite how vocal you are with your little whimpers, it still wasn’t enough.
“Baby,” you gasped, pushing your hips back into his. “Can you—can you go faster?”
Spencer's response was immediate, his breath catching slightly at your request. His gaze met yours in the mirror, searching for any sign of hesitation, but when he saw none, he began to pick up the pace.
“Faster?” His hand tightened on your waist as he gave you a hard thrust, jolting you forward. “Or rougher?”
Both, you wanted both, but a breathless yes was the only thing that managed to slip out of your mouth. His grin was sharp, almost predatory. His movements became even more deliberate, each thrust gaining force and speed, driving into you with an intensity that matched the urgency in your voice.
“You like that?” he asked, voice rough with desire as he leaned closer, his breath hot against your skin. 
"Yes, I—fuck," You blabbered. The pleasure was building, coiling tightly within you. “S-So good.”
Spencer’s other hand moved forward, finding your chin in the mirror and gently turning your face towards his. “Look at us.”
The reflection showed every detail—your wide eyes, his focused expression, the way your bodies moved together in a perfect rhythm. It was overwhelming, and even more intense when the hand on your waist slid around you, fingers brushing your clit.
You mewled, your back pressing against his chest. The visual of watching it all happen, of seeing how your bodies worked together, amplified everything. The combination of his thrusts and the relentless circles his fingers traced over your clit drove you closer to the edge. 
"Spencer, I’m—" you started, breathless, the words catching in your throat as the building pressure within you neared its peak.
"I know," he replied. He could feel it too, the way your body clenched around him, and he was just about at his limit. “Me too… I’m so close.”
You felt every muscle in your body tighten, the coil in your stomach winding tighter and tighter. “Wanna feel you,” you gasped. “Cum… inside…  me.”
Spencer’s response was a deep, guttural groan, his breaths growing even more labored. “Yeah? You want me to fill you up?”
“Please," you whispered, urgency lacing every syllable. “Want your cum in me.”
That did it. He just couldn’t say no to you.
His fingers moved rapidly on your clit as he drove into you. The combination of his deep, determined thrusts and the relentless stimulation of your clit overwhelmed your senses. The room was filled with the sounds of the rhythmic slap of skin against skin, and you could see in the mirror how each movement affected you.
Then, with a few more powerful thrusts, you felt him tense, a deep groan escaping him as he reached his climax. The hot rush of his release inside you was the final trigger your body needed. Your vision blurred, your mind blanked, and you surrendered to the intense wave of your own orgasm, crashing over you with a force that left you trembling and breathless.
Spencer continued to move gently, riding out the aftershocks of your climaxes together, his movements becoming slower, more soothing. As the waves of pleasure subsided, he wrapped his arms around you more tightly, pulling you back against his chest protectively. His breaths were slow and deep, calming against the back of your neck.
You were panting, tired yet blissful, and your eyes met his gaze in the mirror once again.
“How many couples do you think the mirror has witnessed?”
Spencer chuckled softly, his chest rumbling against your back. "More than we can imagine."
He then pulled out from you and a soft sigh escaped you as his hot release slipped from your cunt. Spencer noticed it too, which was why his hand went back between your thighs, his fingers pushing the white, warm liquid back into you.
“Oh my god,” you gasped. “What–you—” You stared at him with wide eyes. “You are filthy.”
“Don’t pretend you’re not enjoying this.”
You sighed, because he was right, more so you were enjoying it too much because his fingers continued thrusting into you and you found yourself pushing back against his hand.
“Spence…” You warned him, although it came out too breathless to make it sound like a real threat.
He grinned, clearly enjoying your response. “Do you want me to stop?”
You paused, pretending to think, but there was no real doubt as you quickly shook your head. Because how could you want him to stop when his touch was so intoxicating, when he was focused so intently on your pleasure more than ever before?
Your eyes drifted back toward the expansive mirror in front of you.
Maybe you should get one for your room.
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slut4thebroken · 4 months ago
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mouth cockwarming hcs
Idk I had an idea lol but I couldn’t figure out which character to use so I just decided to do this instead
Bucky Barnes
Dick Grayson, Jason Todd
Spencer Reid
Cillian Murphy, Emmett, Jackson Rippner, Jonathan Crane, Lenny Miller, Neil Lewis, Raymond Leon, Robert Fischer, Tommy Shelby
(Warnings: daddy kink for a few of them (no incest), a little bit of age play ig?, ionno lol)
Bucky Barnes - He’s no virgin, obviously, but cockwarming in your mouth? That was definitely a new one. It’s not his favorite, but he likes seeing you so relaxed and calm. It reminds him that he’s capable of being gentle with someone so delicate. Plus it’s not too hard— he’s had decades to practice restraint, so he can handle sitting still under you while you nap with his cock in your mouth.
Dick Grayson - Honestly, he gets it— he has an oral fixation too lol, but he usually eats pussy instead. Dick prides himself on being a gentleman though so he’s had plenty of practice putting up with a boner for the sake of not ruining an innocent moment with a girl… Usually he just reads a book or watches a movie to try and not focus on the fact that his cock is literally in your mouth.
Jason Todd - He thinks it’s cute. You’re already so tiny compared to him, but when you use his dick as a pacifier? You just look so fucking adorable. If you’re ever in a situation where you can’t cockwarm him with your mouth, usually you’ll settle for suckling his fingers or his thumb— but you don’t like it as much because the calluses on his hands are too rough compared to his smooth, (sometimes) squishy cock.
Spencer Reid - He gets a little antsy to be honest, but if he has a book or some paperwork to go over, he can usually sit still long enough for you to get your fill. He knows exactly why people find comfort in this sort of thing, and he knows exactly why you specifically find comfort in it. So he doesn’t judge or think it’s weird. He likes being the one that you go to for this comfort.
Cillian Murphy - He finds it a little odd, but as long as you’re happy, he’s happy. Plus he likes how paternal and protective he feels when you’re laying on his stomach suckling on the head of his cock while he pets your hair. It’s usually enough to get you to fall asleep too. He thinks it’s cute hearing your soft snores as you drool a little bit around his cock.
Emmett - Makes his daddy kink go wild tbh. His little girl using his dick as a pacifier? Yeah. Half the time, he can control himself. But sometimes (usually after at least 20 minutes so you can have enough time to enjoy yourself) he’ll gently push on your head, urging you to start sucking more. You whine, but end up doing it anyway just to please him.
Jackson Rippner - Doesn’t like it at all. If you do it right after he fucks your face and shoots his load down your throat then he can usually put up with it for a little bit. But other than that, he doesn’t have the patience for it. Sometimes when you’re napping and he sees you sucking on your thumb instead, he feels a tiny bit of guilt very, very deep down... But not enough to get him to change his mind lol.
Jonathan Crane - He thinks it’s weird as fuck. Honestly he wants to delve deeper into whatever thing from your childhood gave you an oral fixation, but he resists (for now at least). He’s usually pretty good about not turning it sexual, unless he’s particularly frustrated or stressed from work or his… extracurricular activities.
Lenny Miller - He doesn’t really mind. Honestly, he finds it a little relaxing too. He likes coming home after a long, stressful day at work and just laying with his little girl, petting your hair while his dick rests in your mouth, feeling you suckle on the tip while you hug him tightly until you both fall asleep.
Neil Lewis - He’ll try it because you want it so badly, but after less than ten minutes of his cock resting in your mouth, he’s already hard and leaking. He ends up whining and squirming, trying to get you to suck his cock properly until you eventually just give in and blow him. If you do it right after an orgasm, he can usually last longer, but if not, you have ten minutes tops before he gets too needy.
Raymond Leon - He feels the same way about this as he does about most ‘relaxing’ things: it’s a waste of time. So he often tries to work while you’re falling asleep. You’ll lay between his legs with your head resting on his hip, his cock sitting in your mouth, and he only complains if he doesn’t have enough space to use his laptop/tablet.
Robert Fischer - He understands… When he’s feeling subby, he’ll sometimes do that on your nipple. So even when he’s getting hard, he’ll try to ignore it and let you enjoy this for as long as he can handle it. He just reminds himself over and over again that you always let him nurse on your tits for however long he wants, so you deserve to nurse on his cock every once in a while too.
Tommy Shelby - He’s a master of self control honestly so he doesn’t mind it. Sometimes you’ll both lay down for a nap and you’ll suck on the head of his cock until you fall asleep, sometimes he sits up in bed and reads or does some work. Either way, he doesn’t really mind it. Plus you always seem extra inclined to reward him for his patience when you wake up from a nap with it still in your mouth.
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comingdownwithme · 8 months ago
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Hi! I wanna know something about all the creeps. Do you all like hugs, or do they make you uncomfortable? What kind of physical affections do you all prefer if not hugs?
From Most to Least Comfortable with Physical Affection out of the Creepypastas I've Drawn so far, we have...
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Nina is touch starved a big sucker for physical affection so I'd guess that she'd be pretty comfortable with and would be all too eager for a hug. Apart from that though, I think she'd be fine with other forms of physical affection too!
Toby wouldn't be uncomfortable with hugs since I personally see him as someone who's unconsciously touchy, though he doesn't actively seek hugs out like Nina. It really depends on what one's relationship is between him. Once he has identified someone as a non-threat, only then would Toby start being physically affectionate.
Jack doesn't mind hugs! In fact, Jack loves them! You should totally approach him! He won't take your kidney, trust! (He actually doesn't mind hugs though, and depending on one's relationship with him, he'd stop considering someone as prey/a meal)
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Like Toby Jane's affection depends on her relationship with someone, though she's far more reserved and less casual with physical affection than Toby. So, uhh, not exactly uncomfortable with hugs per se, but she'd rather initiate it than be the one hugged.
Despite having a physical form, Ben is... still a ghost- Not saying he can't be hugged or held, but it's basically like hugging frigid air. He can, however, physically interact with his surroundings, so just because someone can't be physically affectionate with him doesn't mean he can't be physically affectionate with others, he just chooses not to lmao
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Jeff wasn't raised in a physically affectionate household and he flip-flops between touch averse and touch starved like a metronome lmfao. You can count the amount of people who can touch him without pissing him off in one hand. He'd much prefer (or is at least used to) compliments and verbal affirmations (which he doesn't get much off anyways in the first place skdjsks)
Clockwork Doesn't like being touched for obvious reasons. She'd only be ok with physical affection if she's the one initiating it which is a rarity in and of itself. Like Jeff, non-physical affection like verbal affirmations or idk, gifts are fine
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mylovesstuffs · 2 months ago
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OT13 reacting to their s/o using drinking as a coping mechanism
Request: idk if i can request this - please ignore it if i can't -, but ot13 reacting to your drinking? like a coping mechanism. we all know it isn't good for someone's health, it can actually bring up more and more problems like alcoholism. but i would love to read something about it. thank you for your amazing work, and i'm truly sorry if i made you uncomfortable. 💘
TW: Mentions of alcohol use as a coping mechanism, unhealthy coping habits, and mild emotional distress. Please proceed with care if these topics are sensitive to you.
Seungcheol: Seungcheol would notice right away since he's deeply intuitive about his loved ones. He’d hold your hand while encouraging you to talk about what’s hurting you underneath it all. He’d be protective but gentle, slowly steering you toward support while staying by your side, no matter how long it takes.
Jeonghan: Would clock it quietly, giving you space at first but keeping a close eye. Eventually, he’d come to you with a soft, “You don’t have to hide from me.” He’d comfort you all without judgment, listening closely, and reminding you how much he cares. His support might include distracting you with fun activities or food.
Joshua: He’d hold your face and softly say, “I don’t want to see you hurting like this.” He’d offer a safe space, lots of hugs, lots of kisses and be a source of kindness. He’d encourage you to open up more and slowly help you find healthier ways to cope.
Jun: Jun would be quiet but very present. He wouldn’t confront you aggressively but would bring it up during a right conversation. “I think you deserve more peace than this,” he’d say with genuine care. Jun would patiently help you feel less alone, staying close even if all you need is silence and his presence.
Hoshi: Hoshi would be emotional, probably tearing up when he realizes how much you’ve been holding in. “Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” he’d ask, voice shaking. He’d want to be your source of comfort, making you laugh when he can but also being serious about helping you through the difficult parts.
Wonwoo: Wonwoo would calmly say, “You don’t have to numb this alone.” He wouldn’t push but would be very observant, offering you non-judgmental space to feel whatever you’re feeling. He’d suggest other coping methods like reading together or late-night walks when you’re ready.
Woozi: He might come off serious at first, but it’s because he’s very worried about you. “I’m scared for you,” he’d admit but be the one who researches ways to help, but also reminds you, “No pressure. I just want you to be okay.” Expect acts of care like him making you playlists or keeping you company late at night.
Dokyeom: He would be your sunshine even in the storm. He’d notice and be your biggest cheerleader in finding healthier outlets and would constantly reassure you that no matter what, you’re loved beyond words. Expect tight hugs and encouragement every day.
Mingyu: Mingyu would notice quickly and feel anxious inside but try to stay calm for you. He’d offer to be your partner in finding healthier coping mechanisms and would replace drinks with hot chocolate or home-cooked meals while always staying close.
Minghao: Hao would be calm but firm. “I know you’re hurting,” he’d say softly. He’d suggest more mindful ways to process your emotions and be there to guide you. Hao would respect your space but constantly remind you that you’re stronger than you think, encouraging you to trust yourself through this journey.
Seungkwan: I think he'd be the most vocal out of them all. “I care about you too much to stay quiet about this,” he’d say with watery eyes. He’d show up with little comforts like snacks or silly projects but wouldn’t shy away from serious talks. Expect him to check in often and be your personal hype squad.
Vernon: “I know why you might be doing this... but I’m here, you know?” He’d let you vent without pressure and would encourage healthier outlets like creating music, art, or even just relaxing together in silence until you’re ready to open up.
Dino: Dino would not be so surprisingly mature about it. He’d say, “I don’t want you to go through this alone.” He’d offer emotional support, suggesting you try hobbies together or take small steps to break away from unhealthy patterns. Dino would remind you how proud he is of you no matter what.
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honeyhotteoks · 6 months ago
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Hi ^^ I know you don't do requests but idk if this qualifies as one, so feel free not to answer this if you don't want to BUT:
Since you put so much thought into analyzing ATEEZ when you write your fics, would you mind giving a brief rundown of where you think they fall on the dom/switch/sub spectrum?
omg great question and i do not mind at all!! thank you for asking~
thoughts on this can be found under the cut, but a little disclaimer at the top — i am only providing my headcanons, that doesn’t mean i’m right or that your interpretation of one of the members as something else is incorrect. i would say this mostly informs how i think they probably are and how i write their characters in my fic, but it definitely is just me playing around in the imagination sandbox please don’t take offense!
also when we talk dorm/sub/switch, i want to be clear that as someone familiar with actual bdsm dynamics, these terms are thrown around pretty liberally and far too often. by that i mean, someone who’s a little bossy during sex doesn’t automatically equal a ‘dom’ in the proper sense and may not be comfortable with that term. however, for the fun purposes of my fic and this ask, we’re going to explore theses terms with the idea that the members could have the potential for it, not necessarily that this is what they are actively doing / engaging in.
alright…… hard thoughts below for each member including headcanon, kink list, and what pet names you call him/he calls you. i’ll happily dive into more into any of the thoughts below, feel free to send me an ask.
one last note - i use the terms man, woman, fem presenting, masc presenting, etc. but i want to be clear i try to be very trans inclusive and queer inclusive in general. while i write the boys always in a relationship with a fem presenting reader because i am a cis woman, that does not mean i am saying they as individuals are heterosexual and only attracted to cis women. i have no idea, this is fiction, and i’d never presume their actual real life sexuality so strongly. however, i am more comfortable writing from my perspective, so if you see that in my work or in my headcanons below please understand it’s not to be exclusionary i’m probably just navel gazing a bit too much. in the pet names section i do stick to things like ‘good girl’ etc. that may imply sexuality but that’s mostly as a representation of my own writing canon.
hongjoong - switch, leaning dominant;
hongjoong to me is such a switch, but i think he takes naturally towards the dominant role. i think a lot of people mistake his demon line stage presence for like…. crazy hard dom though and i could not disagree more. i think he’s actually more the type to switch up based on his partner’s needs and wants, but most often and most comfortably fills a dom role. however, in this dom role i see him far more as a service dom or soft dom, i don’t think with what we know about hongjoong as a person and how he interacts with the world around him he would be much of a hard dom that actually wanted to inflict hard rules or even dip into sadism. the most i could see is when his partner is being bratty or when he’s playfully jealous he would spank a bit or use teasing words to get his partner to say something in response. i think all in all, he’s the type to want to make his partner feel good, but he enjoys being in control and would want to give his partner instructions as a natural leader in that way. he could give up control to the right person, but i just think that’s a little less natural for him.
kinks -> brat taming, praise and degradation used interchangeably, overstimulation, voyeurism, voice kink, guided masturbation, toys toys toys, exhibitionism (he’s putting the lush in you at dinner that’s all i’m saying)
call him -> baby, joong, sir (playfully, less strict), daddy (to tease him he’ll tell you to stop but you can see he kind of likes it)
calls you -> darling, baby, honey, love, gorgeous
seonghwa - switch, gender dependent;
seonghwa is so interesting to me because i feel like his potential suits the whole spectrum. i have written him many different ways and see him many different ways, and so often it feels right, he’s a true chameleon. that’s why i think he is a switch, but i’m saying gender dependent because i think he likely takes more naturally to one direction depending on the gender presentation of the partner he is with. no hard and fast rules here, obviously everyone is unique, but as a general rule i’d say that with women/fem presenting people he skews more dominant, and with men/masc presenting people he skews more submissive. that being said, exceptions exist and i could see him going either way on that sliding scale dependent on partner. i would say for submisssive he would be the type to service, begging to pleasure his partner and enjoying the total submission of that headspace, potentially even enjoying some elements of restraint or pain on himself. for his dominant side, i think out of anyone in ateez he has the true potential for hard dom sadist, though that would require a partner to match him in intensity. i think he would excel in role playing and slipping into a true dominant persona, controlling his submissive entirely (within the bedroom and perhaps a little outside it), and would be able to manage the intense dynamics of sadomasochism well from delivering pain to exploring limits to very tender aftercare.
kinks -> sadomasochism, impact play, breath play, sensory deprivation (blindfolds, headphones), restraints (of all kinds), guided masturbation/instruction, rough sex, throat fucking, breeding, lactation, heels, exhibitionism, voyeurism
call him -> baby, hwa, love, sir or master (for hard scenes), daddy/mommy (roleplay scenes specifically)
calls you -> jagiya, darling, love, angel, sweet girl, good girl, my baby, my babygirl, pretty thing, pet (for hard scenes), mommy (when he’s subbing or when he’s playing into breeding kink as a dom)
yunho - dominant, soft dom with hard dom potential;
first of all, this man is my ult bias and i could write a novel about this, i’m trying to restrain myself. if anyone wants unfettered yunho thoughts lmk…… but truly, and i will die on this hill, while the sub yunho agenda is cute i just do not buy it. this man is 100% dominant, it’s just a question of where he falls on that dominance scale. i think there’s a lot of evidence for this that i can get into in a separate post, but my headcanon is that he’s a classic soft dom at least as a baseline. he’s the kind of dom who considers himself a guiding hand to his submissive. he’s caring, thoughtful, always anticipating needs and clearing the path for his submissive, and in bed that means he’s providing all of the opportunities for his submissive to explore within the safe bounds of his control. however, with the right person i think he has the real potential to reach hard dom levels where he is experimenting with degradation, some amount of pain play (though i do think full sadism is a bit far for him), bondage and control, and playing with pleasure from a denial and overstim angle. he’s also very clearly traditional in many aspects, and while i am not sitting here saying that means he’s sexist (absolutely not) i do think that means he would be turned on by more traditional elements. i.e. his partner in skirts, heels, lingerie, etc. i think with the right partner that also opens up his ability to play with different kinks and dynamics that might fall into that like free use, breeding, etc.
kinks -> rigging/shibari, edging/orgasm denial, pleasure/overstimulation, praise, degradation, breeding and pregnancy, impact play (spanking), restraints (mostly body weight or ropes), free use, fingering (his hands are we fr), if giving head is a kink then consider him a wet pussy enjoyer this man has an oral fixation watch his tongue, omorashi, corruption, breath play, somno, cockwarming, size kink/size training, throat fucking
call him -> yunho, yunnie (when bratting), baby, babe, sir, daddy
calls you -> baby, sweetheart, babygirl, good girl, pretty/pretty girl, pup/puppy (this is self indulgent don’t look at me), all variations with ‘my’ i.e. my pretty girl
yeosang - dominant, pleasure dom/service dom;
yeosang to me is such a sleeper dom. i think he’s hard to read in general, but after years of paying attention to him as i tried to write him, to me he really reads as more of a dominant in a sexual relationship, but definitely from the pleasure/service side of things. i don’t know that he would want to really control aspect’s of his submissive’s life outside the bedroom or perceive himself necessarily to be some kind of guiding figure or punishing figure, but i do think he would relish in giving his submissive pleasure and relief. i think yeosang would want to be the type of partner his submissive could just collapse into at the end of the day and receive whatever kind of care they need. he’s quietly making tea, he’s reminding you to drink your water, he’s easing you into bed with a massage and letting you forget the day as he takes care of you completely. i think in some extremes that leads to him not even really thinking about his own pleasure, he seeks to service his partner and that alone makes him happy. i can see him being the kind of dom who teases a little, but from a kind angle, and just knowing how soft and innocent ateez members perceive him to be, i don’t think there would be much room for meanness or pain with him.
kinks -> edging (cutely), overstimulation / pleasure play, lots of toys with him, guided masturbation / instructions, voyeurism, lingerie, heels, nylons, cockwarming, nipple play, body worship, oral (giving)
call him -> baby, yeosangie/sangie, yeo, sir (when he’s guiding)
calls you -> baby, sweetheart, my love, my girl, honey
san - dominant, soft dom, pleasure lean;
this man is a giver. i cannot express this enough, which is why i added the pleasure lean. i actually think he’s quite similar to yunho in the sense that he’s rather traditional, and within the bounds of at least a het relationship, would take his position as the man of the relationship very seriously. yunho and san both are the types of guys who would spoil their partner, and like being the caretaker, however i think in san’s case he would enjoy the pleasure angle far more than anything else and would not be comfortable with engaging in harder aspects of play with his partner. i truly think if you watch the way he caretakes it’s much softer, and if you listen to the way he speaks about women it’s far more from the angle of protector. my gut says you’d have to convince this man to spank you, so just naturally he falls into the soft dom role of guiding hand plus pleasure dom where he’s focused heavily on delivering pleasure and guiding his submissive through that pleasurable experience. i think he’s the type to set up a really romantic scene - rose petals on the bed, warm bath, champagne, etc. and just worship his partner for hours on end. he of course is going to fuck his partner eventually, but good god does he want to just spend so long touching and massaging and getting every little ounce of pleasure out of them first.
kinks -> body worship, oil/wax, pleasure/overstimulation, breeding, praise, anal, if fingering is a kink he’s got it he wants to see you squirt, cuckholding, voyerism, exhibitionism (light, the thought someone might hear not see necessarily)
call him -> sannie, san, baby, daddy (when the time is right)
calls you -> jagi/jagiya, yeobo (when married), honey, love, darling, sweetheart, my babygirl (casually, cutely), my girl, my wife, etc.
mingi - switch, gender dependent with a sub lean;
mingi… mingi… mingi. this man is such a mystery and yet wears his heart on his sleeve. similar to seonghwa i say he’s a switch but it kind of depends on the gender presentation of his partner. i think you can see this in the ways mingi interacts with the world. with women in general i see him turn on the swagger, and lean at least on the surface a bit more dominant, i could see him slotting into the role of taking the lead quite easily. with men, particularly with yunho though, you can see that he gets much softer, whinier, giggly, and truly has the potential to be submissive. my real guess is that he is a submissive leaning person regardless of gender, but it comes more naturally to him with a man (especially one as obviously dominant as yunho), that being said, with the right female/fem presenting partner, i think he could easily be submissive there too if that partner was properly leading the situation. i could see him being the begging type, pleading with his dominant to service them, and happy to really let himself sink into that headspace. but if he’s with a partner that needs him to step up and take the lead, i think he’d happily do that too which is why i think he’s very switchy.
kinks -> body worship, impact play (spanking specifically), throat fucking (giving and receiving), sensory deprivation, anal, oral (ride his face), lactation, humiliation
call him -> baby, babe, sweet boy, good boy, baby boy, and any variation with “my”, plus we all know princess is in there.
calls you -> babe, cutie, sweetheart (rare, if he’s feeling mega tender), goddess (when subbing), mommy (when super subbing)
wooyoung - true switch;
this man is the switchiest switch i’ve ever seen and i cannot accept anything less. he’s such a brat, but i want to emphasize that i think that means he could be bratty from either the dom or sub position and it’s entirely dependent on his partner. i think wooyoung is the type that bends himself for someone else to be accommodating, and honestly i see a lot of myself in him and vice versa, and we have very similar star charts so stay with me here. i don’t mean that in a negative way of course, but what i think wooyoung excels at is reading people and adjusting to their needs, so i think this would translate into the bedroom too. i think he’s the type to step up and lead if needed but the minute his partner takes a firmer hand he’s letting that shit roll and seeing where it goes. it makes him exceptionally fun to write tbh. i think wooyoung when being more dominant would be the teasing type, making playful fun of his partner while he delivers pleasure, almost goading them into coming. and i think when being submissive he rolls right into whining - the type to beg to come but listen attentively if their partner wanted to edge him. i think would be the perfect match for another switch because they could constantly be dynamic shifting and changing together and really explore so many aspects of themselves that way.
kinks -> oral (giving and receiving and make it messy), impact play (he’ll deliver a little spank but he’ll cum if you slap his cheek), visible cum (i.e. cumming on his partner / marking his partner), marking/claiming bruises and bites, cuckholding, pet play
call him -> baby, babe, wooyoung (but whiny lmao), honey, my boyfriend/fiance/husband (he likes the titles)
calls you -> babe (whiny af), baby, my love (when he’s feeling emo), pretty girl, babygirl, darling (when he’s teasing you), my girl (all the time he’s obsessed)
jongho - dominant, soft dom with hard dom potential;
in the same way that yunho and san read traditional to me, so does jongho. again, not in a problematic way, but in the way that he takes a dominant position in the relationship and seeks a partner who wants that kind of care. while i think all three of them would want a parter who is very dominant/in control in aspects of their career etc., i think being that person’s safe space to give up control is something they all want. so in that way, jongho reads truly dominant to me and is one of the only members of ateez to give the potential for hard dom, again, depending on his partner’s needs. i think he also acts as the guiding hand, he’s traditional in that he likes to pay for things etc., and would ultimately engage in softer aspects of control in the bedroom. however, if his partner really responded well to things like punishment and stricter guidelines, i think he would excel as a hard dom. i can really see him having a partner crawl to him, be waiting submissively on their knees for him, allow him to use them / benefit from actual punishment like counting spanks etc. and so generally i think while he may not need this kind of a relationship, if his partner did he would rise really well to that occasion because it comes more naturally.
kinks -> lingerie, nylons, impact play, breath play, free use, creampies, visible cum (marking with his cum), restraints (silks, cuffs, body weight), sensory deprivation, edging/overstim
call him -> babe, jjong, yeobo (if married), sir (for hard dom play)
calls you -> darling, babygirl, pretty, sweetheart, my love, yeobo, precious girl (during play)
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hxney-lemcn · 1 year ago
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Best Friend — Idia Shroud x gn! reader
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summery: Idia realizes that you might be closer than he thought.
tw: uhhh none I think.
a/n: idk if this is bad, I think I got Idia's personality right. This is kinda more platonic, but could be read as romantic.
wc: 0.6k
Master List
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The more Idia got to know you, the more he realized you might’ve been less of a normie than he originally thought. Of course you were nowhere near Idia’s status of loser otaku, but you still surprised him. It started with you complaining about something called vocaloid? Idia hadn’t heard of vocaloid before, but when you explained the concept he realized it was your world's version of synthaloid. That was the first time he started to question his view of you. As you complained about not being able to listen to vocaloid anymore, he introduced you to some synthaloid songs. He watched as your eyes lit up, head bobbing to the songs as you scanned the lyrics. 
He hadn’t heard of normies liking synthaloid, but you were still too extroverted. I mean you had how many friends in how many dorms? Total normie activities. Yet you shocked him once again when you then started complaining about missing this one video game you used to play. Apparently it was really chill but competitive. When you mentioned it was called AFK Journey Idia froze, he played a game with an uncannily similar name. So he introduced you to AFK Adventure, and found his heart jumping as you gushed passionately, comparing all the similarities and differences. AFK Adventure was still growing, and the fact that you played your version only months after it was released…he once again questioned if you really were a normie. 
The final nail in the coffin was when you complained about how exhausted you were. The main reason why he classified you as normie was because you were social, you had friends, you barely had a phone! (That wasn’t your fault, you had no money after all). So when you complained that you were tired from all the socializing, that you found refuge in his room because you felt like you could truly relax by just playing video games…well he was a bit flustered to say the least. You found him comforting? You found his messy, gross room relaxing (Ortho tried his best to clean it before you arrived)? You enjoyed playing video games with him even if he would tend to blow up if someone annoyed him? 
Idia found himself sharing more with you. It seemed like everywhere he looked (online) he’d find something about you to connect it with. You’d really like this anime, it seemed similar to one you described from your world. You liked chill games right? Well there's this mobile digital pet game you’d like, you just have to friend him. Oh, fanart of your fav character…he’d send it to you if he had the courage. He had also set you up with a pc, laptop, and upgraded your phone without a second thought. It was only to encourage you to go on games to give him rewards…totally. 
And not to mention, when you first joined AFK Adventure, Idia kicked out a member from his guild to let you join. His other guild members were highly confused he let in a noob join since it was a whale only guild (don’t worry, you weren’t a noob for long…thank Idia’s credit card). 
One night, when you both were playing a video game together, you had fallen asleep on his bed. The laptop he had given you was still running, but it was pushed to your side. Idia couldn’t help but feel his face heat up, you looked so peaceful in his space. That’s when he realized he wasn’t truly alone anymore, even if he stayed holed up in his room, you managed to wiggle your way to join him. You would rant about nerdy things to him only, a special privilege you hadn’t bestowed to any of your other friends. He had come to a conclusion that somewhat scared him.
Idia Shroud had a close friend, he wasn’t alone anymore.
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honeypiehotchner · 23 days ago
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The Gambit (Hotch x Fem!Reader) -- part twenty-six
Okay next one! 🤭🤭 (I might be a little MIA for a bit, my grandma passed away, so I could be quiet or super active as a distraction, idk yet but just a heads up!)
Warnings: these two are so cute yet so awkward, Hotch thinks abt Haley but I will take no Haley slander in this house!!!!, lots of fluff, but also lots of angst (in a good way!!)
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Hotch couldn’t be more awkward if he tried.
Within minutes of arriving at Dave’s house, it’s clear that neither of you know what to do with yourselves. 
You say something about needing a shower, and next thing Hotch knows, you’ve disappeared up the stairs, and he didn’t even get a word in. He floundered.
He drops the file box on the dining room table with a sigh, practically hearing Dave already scolding him for bringing the files with him and for having the audacity to put it on the dining room table. But it’s the only table big enough for everything, if the two of you are going to spread everything out to try and get some work done. And Hotch is not even going to bother with Dave’s office.
Hotch leaves his briefcase next to the file box, taking just his duffle bag with him to figure out which one of the many guest bedrooms he’ll stay in.
When he reaches the hallway upstairs, all of the doors are closed, so there’s no way for him to know which one might be yours. He picks a random one, knocking once and trying to listen for any movement before tentatively opening the door. It’s empty, thankfully, so he decides he’ll just go with this one to save both of you the horror of him possibly walking in on you naked. 
Not that you would be a horrifying sight at all, but that’s inappropriate. Wildly inappropriate.
He shakes the thoughts from his head, shutting the door and flicking the lock so he can change out of his suit. Sometimes he wanders around his own apartment in his suit for hours after getting home, only having enough energy and mind to take off his tie and unbutton a few top buttons. Right now, though, he’s itching to be out of it and into something less…stuffy.
He doesn’t know why he agreed to stay with you. He should’ve told you that he had plans. He should’ve said something about having Jack for the weekend — though you would’ve known that one was a lie. He doesn’t have weekend privileges with his son; he gets one day a month, a prison of his own choosing, because Haley didn’t want to involve lawyers in the divorce and Aaron didn’t want to fight. So, he sees his son one day a month, which is never the same day because of his work schedule, and which won’t happen this month because of this case and because of Jack’s spring break. They’re going to the beach with Jessica, Haley’s sister. She promises to send pictures. Aaron doesn’t know if she will.
Setting aside how wildly inappropriate it would be for him to become involved with you, an employee of his, he can’t imagine a universe where you’d even want to — not with the baggage he comes with.
He doesn’t even know why he’s thinking about this, as if you’ve done anything at all to give him any indication that you’re interested. All you’ve done is not argue with him as much the past week. That is nothing for him to overthink like this.
He needs to remember the reality of the situation: he is here as added security for you. This unsub is laser-focused on taunting you, stalking you, and they don’t know what he might do next — but clearly you’re the target. The unsub could do anything, so that’s why Hotch is here. Security. Safety. Protection. Nothing else.
+++
You’ve never put this much thought into changing into comfortable clothes after work.
The problem is, if you were at your apartment, and alone, you’d wear whatever. Probably a t-shirt, maybe some pants but not likely, and call it a day. But you can’t do that right now, because your boss is sitting downstairs.
You’re not wearing a bra, though. You can’t stand them, and you’re only going to torture yourself so much. So, t-shirt and leggings it is, and you can only hope it won’t be as awkward as it feels right now.
All of the doors are closed when you step out into the hall, but you hear movement in the kitchen, so you know he’s downstairs. You make your way down, your footsteps quiet as you turn the corner.
Your eyes widen and your breath hitches, both involuntarily, when you see the sight before you. Hotch in a white t-shirt, Hotch in jeans, Hotch reaching up into the top cabinet for a glass, his shirt riding up just a little, giving you a delicious look of the band of his boxers and his skin.
When he starts to turn around, you start walking in, hoping it looks like you just got there and not like you were ogling him for a few seconds.
“Hey,” he says when his eyes land on you. “Want something to drink?”
“Sure,” you shrug, propping yourself up on a stool in your usual spot. “Just some water, thanks.”
He wordlessly turns to grab another glass, and you shamelessly let yourself have another look. What’s the harm if his back is turned?
As he fills the glasses with water, he chuckles, “So, I’m assuming Dave cooked every night.”
“You’d assume correct. Thanks,” you take the glass from him, having a sip before continuing. “And do not ask me to cook, he did most of it. He tried teaching me how to make pasta from scratch a couple of times — did not go well.”
Aaron laughs, leaning back against the counter across from you, one hand propped next to him. You try not to stare too hard at his hand, his forearm. It must be the fact that you never see him in anything but a suit, so seeing him like this, so…casual, right now, is causing your brain to short circuit. That has to be what it is.
“Wanna order pizza?” you ask, flicking your eyes back up to meet his.
If he notices you looking, he says nothing about it. “Dave might crucify us for ordering pizza to his good Italian home, but let’s do it.”
“I’ll take the blame,” you joke. “He knows the alternative is me almost setting his kitchen on fire.”
“Right,” Aaron laughs, pulling his phone out of his back pocket. “Should we each get a large?”
“You’re speaking my language,” you grin, telling him what you’d like, but he interrupts you barely halfway.
“Already ahead of you,” he replies without even looking up from his phone. You’re grateful for that because he doesn’t see the shock on your face before you conceal it. How the hell did he remember your pizza order? The last time you had pizza with him was a decade ago. “Should be here in an hour.”
“Perfect,” you exhale. “Want some wine? I’ve been slowly working through Rossi’s stash.”
You hop off the stool, walking around the island to the wine rack at Hotch’s left. You can feel his eyes following you — maybe the leggings weren’t a smart choice. Or maybe they were.
“Any preference?” you ask, slowly turning to look at him with a raised eyebrow.
His eyes bore into yours. “No.”
You hum, picking a bottle mostly at random. “Can you get the glasses?”
Aaron stares at you for another long moment before he relents, turning to grab the glasses. You deliberately do not look at him this time.
You reach into the drawer to find the corkscrew, setting to work on the bottle while Hotch carefully places the wine glasses down next to you. 
“So,” he clears his throat, “I put the files on the table in the dining room, I figure it’s the only table big enough for how much we have.”
“Makes sense,” you reply idly, struggling just a little with the corkscrew. It’s not your fault these things seem more complicated than they should be. You’ve been able to do it before, many times, but for whatever reason, right now, it isn’t working—
“Let me help,” he says, hands already reaching over.
“I’ve got it,” you answer automatically.
“You really don’t,” he laughs. “Move over.”
You glare at him, but you move, wanting the wine more than wanting to actually argue over this. “Do you think we should go back to the letters?” you wonder aloud. “If it was a family friend, maybe the letters to my mom? Maybe he mentioned the friend in those?”
“Reid said there wasn’t anyone named in the letters,” Hotch says, twisting the corkscrew and removing the cork with an easy pop. He steps aside and you grab the bottle, pouring the glasses.
“True, but maybe…” You pause, midway through pouring. “Do you want more?”
“That’s fine,” Aaron says, sliding the glass away. “But maybe…?”
“Yeah,” you shake your head, pouring your own share. “Maybe there’s something that’ll jog my memory. Maybe he didn’t name anyone, but…I don’t know.”
“We can take another look,” Aaron says. “I brought the letters.”
“I knew you would,” you chuckle, setting the bottle down to pick up your glass, swirling the dark red. “You were packing that box for a while.”
“Well,” he exhales good-naturedly, “I didn’t want to interrupt your conversation with Emily and JJ.”
The reminder of what they practically interrogated you about sends a heat flooding through you, or maybe it’s the fact that your body is finally catching up to the fact that you’re standing in the kitchen, alone, with Hotch, both of you in casual clothes, and both clearly incapable of keeping your eyes off of one another.
You step away from him, going back to your stool, putting the island in between the two of you. “Should we look into it tonight? Tomorrow?”
Aaron watches you. “What do you want to do?”
“Tomorrow,” you say sheepishly.
“We’ve done enough today,” he agrees. “Come on,” he nods toward the living room. 
It will be more comfortable, but you don’t trust yourself to sit next to him on the couch, so you curl up in the big chair adjacent to it. Hotch doesn’t seem to mind. He sits on the corner of the couch closest to you. 
You try not to think about it.
The silence is absolutely unbearable, though. 
“Should we…watch a movie?” you ask quietly. 
“A movie?” Aaron laughs.
“I don’t know!” you exclaim, awkwardly flailing your free hand. “I don’t know what we’re supposed to do, we’ve never—”
What are the two of you doing? What do you call this?
“I know,” he says softly. “We can put a movie on, so we don’t have to…talk,” he chuckles, setting his glass down on the coffee table so he can stand. “Any requests—”
“Wait, Aaron,” you sit up, and he freezes, and then you’re both just sitting there, waiting. Frozen. Wondering what you’re going to say.
You don’t even know where to begin.
“Can I just—” You suck in a deep breath. “I want to apologize.”
Aaron leans back as if you’ve slapped him. “What?”
“You heard me,” you snap, unable to help it. “Sorry— Exactly, I want to say I’m sorry, for maybe being a little too…harsh on you when it came out that you had gone behind my back and looked into my dad.”
Aaron shakes his head, a pained expression on his face. “No, I’m sorry, I was out of line—”
“You were,” you say, and somehow that shocks him, but he covers it quickly. “You were. But two things can be true. Yes, you should’ve come to me, but I wasn’t exactly approachable. I never really have been.”
“Me either,” he says quietly. “We’ve always…”
“Been at each other’s throats?” you joke. 
“Yeah,” he laughs a little, clearly relieved that you’re trying to lighten the mood. “I’m sure I started it.”
You shrug. “Probably.” When his eyes flick to yours, though, you smile, letting him know you’re just poking fun. Mostly. “In all seriousness, I might’ve started it all those years ago. I’ve always been combative, but you’ve brought it out of me more than anyone I’ve ever known.”
“Ditto,” he says, the shock clear on his face as the word escapes him. “Whatever I did to bring it out of you, I’m sorry.”
You pause, watching him for a moment. He…genuinely doesn’t know what it was that he did. “Do you know what it was?”
He eyes you warily. “No…”
You sigh, taking a sip of your wine before setting it down so you can fully sit up, fully look at him. “You didn’t take me seriously.”
He does nothing this time to hide the shock on his face or in his voice. “What?”
“Ten years ago, when you showed up on my crime scene—”
“Because the detective called us—”
“Without telling me a damn thing about it, by the way,” you mutter. “So I was already pissed off about that, and then the FBI comes waltzing in like they’ve got all the answers in the world, and everyone else are morons for not figuring it out sooner—”
Hotch opens and closes his mouth, clearly searching for the right words. But there are none.
You barrel forward. “Then, you start delegating, and you gave me busy work,” you laugh at it now, how hysterical it all seems. “My expertise was in interrogation and you wouldn’t let me do anything remotely close to it—”
He tries to say your name, but you keep going.
“So yeah, that pissed me off even more. And then it kept happening.”
“I was trying to take things off of your plate,” he says desperately, barely getting the words out with how fast you’re speaking. “You were stretched too thin, you were doing the work of five people, and I wasn’t going to watch you struggle when we were there as extra help.”
“You—” You shake your head, catching your breath. His reasoning rings in your ears. “You couldn’t have said that then?”
“Would you have listened?”
“Probably not,” you huff. “But you did it again, maybe even more when I started at the BAU.”
“Because you were new, I wasn’t going to throw a brand new agent into the deep end on their first day—”
“Why? I’m sure you did that with everyone else—”
“You wanted me to set you up for failure?”
“You practically were!” you cry, wondering when the tide turned. When you went from quietly, sincerely apologizing to whatever this is, these desperate admissions, begging him to understand. “You didn’t trust me from the start, then this stuff with Richard Monroe started happening and it just gave you a reason to justify your mistrust, and it was downhill from there. How was I not supposed to fail?”
“You didn’t fail, and you haven’t failed—”
“This unsub that we can't seem to find suggests otherwise,” you grumble.
“It’s not your fault and it does not mean you’ve failed at this job,” he says, practically on the edge of his seat, just as desperate. “Please, I’ve never— Everything I’ve done, it was never from a place of not taking you seriously. I’ve always taken you seriously, you’re good at what you do, you always have been.”
You stare at him, chest heaving, wondering if you believe him. “Then what is it, really? Where was it coming from?”
The doorbell rings and slices through the air. As Hotch gets up to go to the door, you have a feeling you aren’t going to get your answer.
+++
As Aaron brings the pizza back into the living room, you’re already flicking through Dave’s TV, searching for something to watch. To fill the silence that is inevitably going to coat the rest of the evening. 
Aaron let’s you have it. He sets the pizza down wordlessly, refraining from looking at you. 
But he can’t let the moment escape any further without saying anything. He has to say something. 
“It was coming from a place of care— or I was trying to,” he says, and if it weren’t for the near imperceptible tensing of your shoulders, he wouldn’t even think you’re listening. “Haley and I were having an especially rough week when I first met you. Taking it out on you — or anyone — wasn’t my plan, but clearly, when you started to get combative, as you said, I retaliated. I shouldn’t have. I saw how much work you were doing compared to your teammates, all of them relying on you to do the heavy lifting, and it frustrated me on your behalf. I meant to take things off your plate, I meant to remove enough from your shoulders that you’d be able to let your mind run free, to help us solve that case quickly — and you did. But then you…you hated what I was doing and you hated that I was there and I couldn’t stand it and I reacted in a way I shouldn’t have.”
He steals one look at you and finds you frozen, eyes wide as you look up at him. 
He looks away. “I’m sorry, I am, for how I acted ten years ago and how I acted when you started at the BAU — and how I’ve been acting. I was told I was getting a new agent, and well, I wasn’t expecting you to walk through those doors.”
You scoff. It just barely borders on playful annoyance. “Why? Didn’t think I’d make it this far?”
“No,” he replies seriously. “I assumed you had much better, more worthwhile places to be.” He pauses. “And that you knew I was the Unit Chief and never in a million years would have agreed to a transfer to the BAU.”
He waits for a rebuttal, but he doesn’t get one. 
“Anyway, I um,” he scratches the back of his neck, handing you some napkins before taking his spot on the couch again, slightly farther away from you this time. “I’m sorry. I don’t think there’s anything I can say to make it better or— or to fix any of it, but I’m sorry. For all of it.”
“It doesn’t need fixing,” you say, so quietly that he almost doesn’t hear it. “But thank you.”
He glances over at you with a smile, soft and a bit sad. You return the same look, but neither of you say anything else. 
It’s enough. For right now, it’s more than enough.
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stardustedseas · 1 month ago
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okay a couple more wintersentry things because i had more ideas but they didnt fit the vibe of my first post so
bucky showing bob one his favorite restaurant in town that has food to make your eyes roll back but never seems to be super busy or overwhelming. it has an old timey charm, ran by a couple almost as old as bucky himself with decore and vibes to match, it feels like a place suspended in time in the best way possible. okay maybe they dont officially call it a date but with the soft lighting, yummy food and livley but easy conversation all in a little bubble of their own, it sure seems like a date to anyone looking in.
ouuughhhh them both being so touch starved but unused to a soft hand, they easily slip into a routine of lounging around together in silence, just taking in the comfort of another human being. with bucky reading a book with his arm slung over bobs shoulders as he rests agaisnt buckys side and playing a random game, (inspired by this art which i love sm) it quickly becomes both of their fave way to decompress.
STOOOOOP imagine bucky taking bob out for a joy ride around the city on his motorcycle and giving bob his coat (the dream) because 'its chilly and yelena would have my head if you caught a cold',,,,, no other reason,,,,def not because bucky thinks he looks so handsome with wind swept hair, biggest grin and all bundled up in his leather jacket. ougggh or bob showing bucky some of his comfort games (idk how canon this is but i love how everyone seems to agree he enjoys games and would love sdv and animal crossing), even if bucky doesnt fully understand the apeal, he does enjoy watching how excited bob gets to explain the little virtual world he created. its kinda comforting in the way that its so mundane and inconsequential in comparison to their regular one wrong move and youre dead day to day.
bob thinking buckys metal arm is so cool and loving to just look at and touch it. maybe it even helps ground him by tracing along the golden lines, feeling the smooth texture, and focusing on the cold of the vibranium against his sweaty palms instead of the dark thoughts trying to take over. bucky feeling a little better about himself with that, knowing his arm isnt just a tool to harm but can be of help in more ways than lifting something heavy. even though hes killed and hurt many many people, the fact it brings comfort to bob is,,,, nice <3
sobssss them learning to take better care of themselves together, eating food not just because its a necessity but just because it tastes good, using better soaps on their hair to keep it from getting too tangled or greasy as fast, doing simple activities that dont realy have an end goal besides being fun, trying to get a sleep schedule that isnt pure ass, hanging out with people instead of brooding in loneliness.
bucky lowk highk feels bad because bob is so much younger than him with a lot less life experience, still coming into his own, but the connection they have is undeniable.
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nickssidewitch · 5 months ago
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✨♌️ Sturniolo Triplets 2025 Predictions ☄️✨
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First of all, HAPPY NEW YEAR! Thanks to you all for such a glorious welcome to the Sturniolo Tumblr Fandom! 🤍 I've had such a great time here so far, and I'm so thankful for literally every person I've met so far on this app. I do hope (and know) there will be newer accounts who are new additions to this fandom made this 2025, and to them, I say welcome, and they are welcome on my account with open arms! 🥹🤍✨
Here are the predictions I have for the Sturniolos! Be warned that some may not even happen this 2025 and I might be getting messages of things that may occur in 2025, or things that are still occuring that have existed since the last 3 months since 2024. Tarot and energy reading is like that sometimes since time is not linear and energy can shift and be read differently as time progresses.
With that all being said, here are some predictions I have for the boys individually, as well as group-wise as brothers and as a brand.
🍀✨ The Sturniolo Triplets' Predictions as a whole entity ✨🍀
New group projects. This includes new video ideas, new ways of producing and creating content, and even doing trials of new ways to present their content.
Tour prep or even the start of a tour. This tour will be different from the rest, with newer ideas and fun activities for them and the fans to enjoy! They may even expand to newer countries and areas.
Travelling. The boys will experience new cultures and have agreat time in other countries together. Seeing Nick venture off into these new places in a different hemisphere allowed them to pull off that bandage of being more open to travelling further than just different states in the U.S.
More fan involvement in content, less fan involvement in personal lives. There will definitely more of a connect with their fandom when it comes to creating newer ideas and videos. However, they don't want to allow the fans into their personal lives as much anymore due to obsessive fan behavior that occurred to them both privately and publicly over the past few years (specifically 2023 and 2024). Less of them posting with friends and family except for just a few that they may collab with or those who feel a bit more comfortable with backlash or any hate they may receive.
More collabs with different YouTube and Twitch creators, even those that you all are probably not expecting.
Music involvement. I can't say too much on this, however I see them being involved in the music world, especially behind the scenes. This may be involvement in videography of music videos, promo for music, being sponsored, and just having more fun with their music friends and newer people as well.
Will the triplets themselves release music? Y'all will have to see...
New ways to do and film car videos, probably will film them a bit less? The car video visions and energies always fluctuate. On one hand, the boys love the comfy feel of them and would love to continue. On the other hand, from a profession perspective, sometimes they feel bored of them and feel as if they repeat the same content. So, to be honest, in terms of a prediction I feel content in, I don't really even have a clue with what they'll do. I want to say that they'll try new forms of car videos and then ditch the idea the following year or just do it every now and then within other forms of content. We'll have to see. This seems more of a late 2025/early 2026 thing. Idk.
🦋🍃 Matt Sturniolo Predictions 🍃🦋
Reading a lot more. He will definitely pick up more books, and even feel inspired to write his own one day.
More quiet on socials. If you think he was quiet now, just wait. He'll go ghost even more, especially just due to staying away from toxicity and the internet. It fucks with his brain.
A romantic relationship. I think he'll have a relationship or two. Seems fair to say. But I wanna give you all advice on this: From his spirit guides, they want you all to CHILL and BUTT OUT of his personal romantic endeavors. They know there will be bad apples, but if you can do your part, please oh please do not post about them a lot or be super negative. I personally wanna say there will be a girlfriend who is not a fan favorite and you all don't have to guess which girlfriend this will be... Y'all can say whatever you want about her honestly. She's kinda... hm. Anyway, you all will know when the time comes. You'll feel her intentions in your guts. The other girl I'm seeing is an absolute sweetheart omg protect her.
New friends. He'll step out of his comfort zone a lot more and make new friends. This is kinda along the same timeline of having a new romantic relationship.
More confident in certain aspects of himself. This is due to new inspirations, new motivations, and new endeavors he will have.
Personal YouTube videos. Yes. That is the post.
A lot personable in terms of conversations of mental health. He'll be having heart to hearts with people about his mental health both in the past and in the future. He definitely wants to be more of an advocate and champion of mental health rights and conversations.
Fashion ventures. Not saying much about this. But be prepared. New clothes, new appearances, new poses, new models!
🧡✨ Chris Sturniolo Predictions ✨🧡
New collaborations, sponsors, partnerships, etc. He will be making his own personal coin with these sorts of deals. They seem to be sports related, music related, fashion related, pop culture related.
New music things. New friends in music, new deals in music, new favorite artists, bigger artists, new concerts, bigger concerts and venues. He will be flown out to new things (by himself and alongside his brothers).
New clothes! Definitely a lot more and very different stylistic choices. He wants to experiment with newer aesthetics, colors, jewelry, textures, designs, etc. A lot more IG pics of him stunting in new fits to say the least. Also includes New Fresh Love clothes and accessories with new models!
More of a social media grind. Or at least he'll want to. There will be a point where he won't post and everyone will be like ??? But don't worry, it's for great reasons!
Dating. There's not much else to say about this. Y'all get the idea.
New friends. Kinda said all this before. And this applies to all three triplets tbh.
New interests! He definitely will be exploring new things a lot more this year. TBH I feel like he does every year, as this is sort of a resolution for him.
Less fear in social situations on his own? I think all of the newer ventures will make him feel a bit more comfortable on his own. I wouldn't say he'll be fully independent, just that he'll be more open to independence.
More flexing. Just sighed while typing this, but in more of a "Oh brother, here he goes again..." joking way.
Some scandal going on either involving him or involving someone who he is associated with that people will try to group him with. It will set him off course a bit, but he'll manage.
He will also curse and call people out when necessary.
🪁🪩 Nick Sturniolo Predictions 🪩🪁
Sooo many more ideas, soooo many more things to do, people to meet, deals to make, etc. In short, he will be grinding.
New friends! He's going to meet new people who fulfill him a lot more. The fans will definitely see him branch out more and hanging out with familiar as well as shocking new faces.
More independence. He will be doing more things on his own (just as his brothers will be). He'll just be flying like a bird (literally and figuratively).
Dating/Exploring. That's it.
Exploring his photography and videography a lot more. You all will definitely be seeing his name in some places you all wouldn't believe!
Collaborations. Whether it's other creators, other brands, etc., y'all will see it and have to blink twice.
New Space Camp products/ventures. Some seem more limited and more of like "trial runs", while others seem like things he'll definitely be keeping in stock. Also new lip flavors. I sense things that are fruity, fun, and definitely even more flavorful than the last packs. He will be working with newer people in his Space Camp brand.
Heartbreaks and a bit of down times. I hate bringing this up, but these are things I sense, especially with certain friends and people in his life. He will feel a bit down about these disconnections. But he'll live through them!
You all can ask me questions in my ask about other predictions and questions about things I didn't bring up. There are things I probably missed out on or just forgot to add, and so when you all ask me about them, I will post the links to the answers of those asks on this post so you all can go back to them!
Remember, some of these may not even be this year. They can be things that bleed out to 2026, or later if the guides were just super hype and wanted me to say them earlier! 😭🤍
And this also isn't about me trying to prove something. I hardly ever go back and checkmark things that are accurate in my other posts, so I don't really plan on doing it with these predictions (unless I'm super proud of it!). I'm not an egotistical reader who loves to prove how accurate she is (not saying all readers who do this are like this).
You are all amazing! Spread love and kindness! Have a Happy 2025! 🎆🤍🥹
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velvetwyrme · 2 months ago
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What happened to cybug Prowl's colony anyways? I do imagine something like a swarm of starving seekers (idk maybe their habitat was destroyed so they ganged up at some point and attacked the first big congregation of cybugs they could find...)... but there could be many other possibilities so. Uh.
seekers ARE a big problem for other cybugs (as mentioned here) but in prowls case specifically, i think it was more that he was separated from his cohort of enforcers shortly after pupating, where he just got enough time to connect with them before they ran into trouble. in this instance it'd have been a storm or something similar, rather than predators/other cybugs.
this is when green would find him and have the experience of trying to nurse him back to health with the intention of letting him go after, but since he was missing bonds with other enforcers he ended up hanging around a lot more, albeit outside (and then jazz shows up!)
also hi im co-opting this ask to reply to a few other jeetle/peetle asks below the cut
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no <3
well... maybe? i think that they can probably understand patterns well enough to read some simple words but i dont think they'd be able to understand longer sentences.
im sticking with the idea that they cannot understand human languages (spoken or written) but that doesn't stop them from making associations for series of shapes/sounds and their corresponding concepts.
so they might understand specific words but not sentences/sentence structure imo. probably.
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difficult question! how do cats/dogs/birds see their humans?
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they dont like. see her as a really big bug (that's what cars are for /j /j) but i imagine they probably see her as a family member, a companion and a source of safety/comfort. i also think prowl would be closer to her than jazz as well.
slightly less difficult question! gives me an excuse to mention something thats been on my mind for a while sjkfdhsdf
i've been thinking of jazz as being part of a species that has a different type of social structure compared to Praxians, where they tend to end up in smaller groups that come together for certain seasons, raising offspring together in social groups. these groups aren't as static as seeker trines, often gaining and losing members over time.
as for j/p specifically... i wouldn't go so far as to say they're a bonded pair (they're both relatively independent), but they definitely have a close connection.
im not really sure about how attraction would work for cybugs (gestures loosely at whatever's going on with skystar) because i think that jazz would consider him to be one of his "group", albeit not one that he can reproduce/raise offspring with. (and i mean... he's effectively found a way around that anyway)
ALSO i think something that would be funny is if in their first meeting, prowl ends up accidentally acting out courting activities at jazz, who's just like >:0?! (i was thinking that prowl probably ends up leading jazz around by his hand, and also chasing him a little, and jazz is just like. swooning)
also to extend my response from the previous question- jazz'd view Green in a similar way (so she's part of his social grouping) but minus the mating/partnering context!
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