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giggly-squiggily · 5 months

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💝Candy Heart Valentine Event 2024!💝

We're back again- WHOOO!

Heyo everybody! It's the sweetest time of the year; Candy Hearts time! Thank you so, so much to everyone who's participated in the sentence starters survey this year; it really helped me figure out what prompts to keep and which to change out! I truly appreciate it!

Another major thank you to everyone who's also sent in suggestions! There were so many good ones to pick from; and I ended up choosing a few from the ones recommended!

💝 Rules💝

- Send me a pairing (Platonic or Romantic) from the fandoms listed below along with a candy heart phrase (Sentence Starter) from the list! (Ex: ObaMitsu- True Love) and I will write a short dabble for it!

- The event will be open from January 28-February 13th, ending at 8:00 PM EST. I will make an announcement when prompts are officially closed!

-Multiple prompts are allowed! The limit is like- 5? Just be sure to send them in separate asks if you send multiples! (Helps me make sure I get them all :D)

- Dabbles will start coming out Feb 1!

- I do write “Character x Reader!” (If you want it to be platonic, please specify with “Platonic!Reader”)

-Multiple sentence starter requests are allowed!

- Requester’s Choice: This is essentially a blank Candy- you can pick whatever sentence starter you want for it! :)

-Please check my pinned post for any characters/ships/things I will and won't write! Thank you :)

~Candy Hearts and Fandoms Below The Cut~

💝 Candy Heart Sentence Starters 💝

**: Recommended by you lovely folks!

❤️ Be Mine: “Oh that is IT! Come here!”

🧡 Miss You: “When’s the last time you smiled?”

💛 True Love: “I could do this all day.”

💚 Cutie: “You can't hide from me, I can hear you laughing!"**

💙 XOXO: “Hey, do you like raspberries?”

💜 Angel: “What happens if I do this?”

❤️ I love you: "What a brave thing to say for someone so ticklish."**

🧡 Bestie: Requester’s choice: Pick your own sentence starter!

💛 Sweet Heart: “Oh? Is someone ticklish?”

💚 Cupid: “I’m gonna get you!”

💗 Say Yes: “Hey did you- give that back!"**

💙 Smile: “I didn’t know you were ticklish here!”

💜 Hug: “I just want a hug!”

❤️ Darling: “Do you want me to tickle you?”

🧡 Love bug: “What’s so funny?”

💛 Soul Mate: “Not there? What about here?”

💚 Sweet Pea: “Is this a bad spot?”

💙 Adore: “I haven't even touched you yet!"

💜 Kiss me: “Don’t stop? If you say so!”

❤️ Me + You: “No way! I didn’t know you were ticklish!”

🧡 Always and Forever: “Look how red you are! How cute!”

💛 I’m Yours: “You like being tickled, don’t you?”

💚 Puppy love: “Where are those giggles I love so much?”

💙 Only You: "Stop squirming!"**

💜 Hot Stuff: “Come over here and make me!”

🩷 Be My Valentine: "I know all your weaknesses!"**

❤ It's Love: "Hey could You...You Know?"

🧡 Babydoll: "Keep your arms up!"**

💝 Fandoms 💝

-Some of the fandoms on here will have **Limited Request** beside them. This means I will only be taking up to a limited amount of that fandom.

If the fandom is crossed out, it means all slots for it have been filled!

Big Windup

Black Clover

Blue Lock

Buddy Daddies

Bungo Stray Dogs

Chainsaw Man

Code Realize

Collar x Malice

Danganronpa

Demon Slayer **Limited Request**

Dr. Stone

Fire Force

Fruit’s Basket

Free! Iwatobi Swim Club

Given

Haikyuu!!

Heartstopper

Hell’s Paradise: Jirokuraku

Hunter x Hunter (Up to Greed Island arc)

Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure

Jujutsu Kaisen

Komi Can’t Communicate

Moriarty The Patriot

My Hero Academia **Limited Requests**

Piofiore (Dante's route; still working on others)

Pokemon **Limited Requests** (All Gens)

Rain Code: Master Detectives

Sk8 The Infinity

Spy x Family

Toliet Bound Hanako Kun

Tokyo Revenges

Vinland Saga

Yu Yu Hakusho

Thanks again to everyone! I'm so excited to see what y'all have in store! :D

#squiggily rambles #Candy Heart Valentine Event #chve2k24 #Let the event begin! >:D #I'm so excited for this AHH!

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boxofthings · 7 months

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Originally was gonna write 09 soaproach angst but decided to fulfill this request that was sent months ago (anon I'm so sorry but if you're still around I hope you enjoy!)

This was heavily inspired by THIS art post by @miilkybnn (it hurts me deeply)

09 ghostsoaproach for all you masochists :)

Read on AO3

-- -- --

He can feel the painful snap of his fingernails underneath gloves that claw desperately into rust. The roof tile comes away from the sudden pressure of his weight.

There's heavy smoke in his lungs, and if the universe had given him an extra ounce of precious time, maybe he'd let the smell funnel down into his stomach, imagining for just a moment that it tasted like Villa Clara's.

His heart races as the hand that shoots out for him falls short by mere inches, and his body drops to the ground in a blackened hush.

It doesn't help that their worried voices screech into his shock-delirious brain as he comes to. If he were a less determined man, he'd stay right where he was, admit defeat and fall right back into that blissful, unconscious nothing.

"Roach!"

But he's not. Because despite his wounds, his defeats, his lack of a weapon, and the sheer absurdity of his chances of survival—he wants to live.

And if not that, then at least he wishes hopelessly to have a sendoff with blue and brown eyes to watch over him like guardian angels.

He pulls himself to his feet, limbs screaming at him for mercy, and he runs like it'll be the last time he ever will, and it just might well be.

Bullets and their casings fly through the air like deadly confetti, and Roach can only push forward as the captain's poignant concern rings deep in his ears.

He's probably been shot—multiple times likely, but there's a red over his mind that pumps wild adrenaline through his body. He wonders if, from the safety of the carrier, he must look like a madman.

"Thirty seconds! We're runnin' on fumes here!"

If he makes it out of this, if he lives to tell the tale, this'll be one hell of a conversation starter—one for the history books, that's for sure.

His chest is beginning to burn, and he can feel the familiar, dreadful indication that his legs are starting to drag like stones.

Not yet.

The only thing that keeps his blood boiling with stubborn life is what awaits for him on that carrier, no doubt with bated breaths and mirrored anxieties.

Fifteen seconds.

Blades slice the air of the sky in pulsating waves; each gust feels like it hits Roach harder as he hangs onto his last drop of fuel like a fraying rope.

So close.

Sliding down the debris of the favelas, each bump another bruise to his body, he can only think of how hard he'll collapse after and if he makes that final leap.

"Jump for it!"

With his tank nearly empty, he musters the remaining energy he has and jumps with his whole heart in his throat. The murky waters below will not be as merciful as the ground of militia-ridden streets.

His fingers make jarred contact with the ladder of the carrier, and he clings to it with heaving breaths that rattle his entire body. In his ear, he hears the sharp intake of a gasp as Nikolai flies them further away from the chaos of gunfire.

He's alive. And he's damn well feeling it if his aching bones and bleeding flesh have anything to say for it.

As soon as he's dragged into the opening of the Pave Low, a deadly grip yanks him into a shuttering embrace.

The lieutenant says nothing at first, only holding him with a restlessness typically reserved for dying men.

"Fuckin' hell."

Fucking hell's right. He falls into Ghost's solid weight with laboured limbs and a pounding heart. If, from now on, the captain decides to bench him for his deficiency in acrobatics, he's not so sure he'll protest.

Behind him, he can feel how Soap's eyes pierce scrutinizing daggers into his back, and he fears the tongue-lashing he'll receive as soon as he turns around.

But when he finally releases from Ghost's arms and meets icy blues, there's a pause in the air from the silence that meets him.

Mouth set in a grim line, fists clenched at his sides, the captain is the epitome of tension. As he watches Roach longer with that look of grievance, his head hangs, shaking it frustratingly and turning away to speak to Nikolai.

Roach can't help how his heart drops down to his stomach, shame pooling hotly down his throat.

The post-adrenaline rush makes his head float, and he's not too certain he didn't earn a concussion from that fall. A shaky exhale takes with it the muscles that keep him standing, and all of a sudden, he feels the brittleness of his bones.

"Bug," Ghost says, hand intertwining with his, pulling him down gently to sit next to him.

Roach acquiesces easily, slumping down like a sack of flour.

His lieutenant holds his hand tighter, and Roach leans his head on the older's shoulder.

Despite this victory, he can't help but feel the looming fear of what will come next. His injuries hurt terribly, but he's content to sit like this for just a little bit, pretending for just a moment that everything will be okay.

– – –

The safe house they hunker down in becomes blanketed in a constricted silence as they wait for US forces to transfer them to their next location.

The captain ushers him to the kitchen, first aid kit supplies already splayed out on the table.

Roach feels the beginnings of a timer go off in the space between them.

His commanding officers bracket him, dabbing saline into his wounds and applying gauze over the reds that spread across his skin.

It's only when Soap begins to wrap bandages around his middle does the air around them suddenly freeze into a tangible outrage.

"You bloody fool," he hisses, fingers ripped away from the bandages and digging urgently into the flesh of his arms.

Beside him, Ghost goes still.

"Just how many jumps are you going to miss until it kills you?"

There it is, the bated agony that masks itself as scorn—the dam Roach had been anticipating to burst any minute since he'd made contact with that ladder.

There's anger in the air that feels sharp and critical, but Roach can't fight against it because the underlayer of that deadly heat swirls a deep, visceral anguish. Fear that threatens to rip them apart right through the heart.

"I-" his wretched throat scratches out. There are words he wants to say out loud, words that his captain and lieutenant deserve to hear, but that burn on his tongue trickles deep into his larynx, and it renders him quiet, like a pathetic coward in the face of blame.

"I'm sorry," his hands finish for him, fingers never heavier. And he watches as the captain's face falls so awfully, how the lieutenant turns away like he can't bear to watch him any longer.

Is this what they are doomed to be? Three lovers trapped in a perpetual cycle of fear and loathing, trapped in an echo chamber of a cacophonous "who will be next?"

There are no words to ease their ailing minds because, at the end of the day, who knows if and when they'll become lies?

A sigh. The hands gripped so tightly around his arms drop defeatedly.

Soap wordlessly exits the room, leaving Roach with a heavy tongue of unspoken atonements. The unfinished wrap of bandages feels like it scalds his skin.

Ghost looks back at him, eyes crushing but quietly soft, something only reserved for Roach and the captain.

He takes up the space Soap had emptied and continues where the other had left off, holding the bandages with sure hands.

"He's just worried," Ghost says as soon as the wrap is secured, helping him slowly put on his shirt.

Roach can't muster the will to look Ghost in the eye, which is a first for them.

The other takes both his hands into his, urging Roach's gaze to land on him.

"Just–be more careful, yeah?"

The fingers that smooth over his battered hands shake like there's an all-consuming dread that threatens to spill right out of every pore.

In a second, they retreat, replaced instead by the warmth of a full body wrapped around him in a desperate embrace.

"You have no idea how it felt, watching it all from the Pave Low."

It's so rare to hear his lieutenant speak so weakly. Such a voice did not suit Ghost, or perhaps it did, as how else were battered and spent soldiers meant to sound? But Roach did not like knowing he was the cause for it.

"You're one hell of a fighter, bug."

So are you, he wants to say, but he knows Ghost won't care for it.

It's not just the sheer, dumb luck that keeps him alive. It's the two men he found at the wrong and right time, in the midst of a war that offers them no comforting promises for the future, but also bringing a lightness at a time where his life had never felt so dark.

He doesn't want to lose this.

He sees a small grin begin to imprint on the lieutenant's balaclava.

At the arch of Roach's brow, he chuckles minutely.

"It's just funny, 'innit? How the roles 'ave swapped." Ghost's eyes crinkle in soft reminiscence. "Years ago, it would've been me stormin' out that door."

Roach mirrors his smile. He remembers the start of it all, how the captain had so readily accepted Roach's affections, open and carefree, before the stakes of war had tipped so precariously to where it was now.

"Probably be needin' me to swoop in and save yer arse wherever we go," the captain had said after Roach had bashfully pressed cold lips to warm ones in an impulsive confession of love.

It was so easy to talk to Soap, as he was everything Roach had strived to be and more. A stable force in his life that made him feel nearly invincible.

And Ghost...well, he was much the opposite, almost averse to that same tenderheartedness that had won over the captain.

He remembers how he got shot, pushing the lieutenant out of harm's way, how the lieutenant had screamed at him once they arrived back on base, how Soap had held him back, and how distraught Roach had felt once he'd stormed out the room, a sizzling anger that took Roach weeks to understand was, in reality, fear.

It's so strange to look back on now, to envision a Ghost who was so pent up with wrath it followed him wherever he went.

It makes him realize how much has changed—is still changing.

Ghost takes off his sunglasses, and like this, Roach can stare into pretty browns that gaze at him lovingly.

"Back then, I just never knew how to express my damn emotions."

Roach brings the lieutenant's face closer to him, kissing slowly regardless of the fabric that separates them.

"You do now, though," Roach signs when they break apart.

Ghost eyes crinkle when he smiles. "Only for you two."

– – –

Ghost had shooed him away when he tried to help clean up the mess of bloodied cotton balls and scattered gauze pads.

He'd taken this as his sign to seek out the captain. Pushing the door to the only bedroom slowly, like a child in worry of waking their parents.

Soap sits on the edge of the bed, hands clamped together with his head hung low—lost in turbulent thought. It shoots right up at the creak of the door hinge.

For a moment, neither man knows what to say, Roach shuffling closer till the older has to look up at him.

When he opens his mouth, the captain's arms shoot up to drag the sergeant down onto his lap in the tightest hug he's ever received from the other.

"God, you're so stupid," he whispers, head burying deep into Roach's chest as if he wanted to be merged with it. "Why'd I get assigned such a dafty for a sergeant?"

A melancholic lilt seeps to his lips as he rests his cheek on Soap's head.

"I'm sorry," he whispers, as sincere as his love is true.

Soap's head lifts, hands flying to Roach's face, and he can see the desperate ache in those eyes.

"Don't be sorry, you oaf. You nearly died." The crack in the captain’s voice strikes a chord so deep in Roach’s chest that it almost makes him cry.

There's a weight that sits like a thousand marble statues on the captain's shoulders, and with each passing day, Roach sees as that load drags heavier behind him.

"Funny how history repeats itself. First mission with my captain, nearly falling to my death. First mission as captain with my sergeant doing the exact same."

He'd said it right after their first stint in Kazakhstan.

It was meant as a jest to lighten the post-haze of a near-death experience, but Roach had seen the slight cynicism in the captain's eyes that he had yet to pick apart.

Weeks later, he'd sit outside the base during the quiet of the night, with MacTavish's cigar flicking soft light into the darkness, and understand, for the first time, that the captain was just a man, just like him. A soldier with burdens like everyone else.

"With every man that I lose on a mission is another ghost that haunts me when I go to sleep."

"It's not your fault," the sergeant had said then, and meant it earnestly, because how could Captain John MacTavish—the man who'd jump after you if you fell into a pool of molten lava if it meant even the slightest chance of saving you—ever be to blame for the death of a soldier?

But it was more than just that. It was the spectre of a past mentor, one that left daunting footsteps to fill that Soap had fought with every breath to satiate with justice.

It had made the beast of a man before him appear so painfully human, and Roach had only yearned for him more because of it.

Now, as they hold each other, Roach can see how that weight must feel like the most crippling force. And he knows how deeply every failure hits the other like real bullets.

When he'd nearly drifted off in the Pave Low, he'd caught the tail-end of a hushed exchange between Ghost and Soap. Voices tense, waiting to snap any minute.

"I couldn't catch him," the captain had muttered, broken off and deprecating.

Soap picks at the hem of Roach's shirt, inhaling sharply when he sees the bandage peek out.

"One day," he starts, and it's melancholic yet intimate like Soap had thought of it a million times. "There'll be a mission where I won't be there to catch you."

Roach frowns, seeing that familiar burden of responsibility that the captain readily throws onto his shoulders.

"It's not your job to."

Fists clench around his shirt.

"Yes, it is," he says fiercely. "If not as your captain, then-"

His mouth hangs open, words caught in the emptiness of the air around them, and Roach can't bear to look at that awful anguish in Soap's eyes.

Then as someone who loves you.

It makes his chest hurt how easy it all was before—or maybe not easy, but how much less consequential their actions meant back then—when their love had only been labelled as one-off jokes, when the task force wasn't stretched so thin and smaller than when it had started. When Roach could say he cared for someone and not have to worry whether they'd disappear to ash the next day.

"I'm sorry," Roach offers instead, "for making you worry." It feels like it's all he can say.

The smile he receives is bittersweet, but it's such a rarity nowadays to see anything happier. Even so, he wishes he could fix it—to smooth out those worry lines that make the other look so haggard.

The captain tilts his head, surging tentatively to capture Roach's lips in his own, and the kiss makes him think of everything that defines their relationship.

When rough lips touch his own, it's so familiar, like the nostalgia of a home that exists only in his mind. The tang of cigars and the bitterness of Earl Grey tea. How does he even begin to describe how intrinsically this love has changed him?

Such small things that he previously couldn't have cared less about now mean everything to him. And it makes him notice all the things that only he is meant to notice.

Like how Ghost prepares coffee in the mornings, despite preferring tea, all because the captain and himself once mentioned they only slightly prefer it to the latter.

Like how Soap begrudgingly supplies the base with that shitty off-brand version of Earl Grey that Ghost, for some reason, likes so much.

Like how when the lieutenant or sergeant go to bed aching, there's an unsuspecting bottle of painkillers and water glasses on their nightstands that they don't remember leaving there.

Like how little aspects of himself change to become a little bit more like the ones he loves.

Despite preferring coffee, he thinks he'd choose tea over it now.

And every time the captain offers out a cig, Roach easily declines because there's a much better way for him to enjoy the taste.

Every kiss they share is one that could be their last. So Roach savours every minute of it, commits to memory the feel of Soap's hands on his waist, the way the other breathes heavily as their lips intertwine in a longing embrace, the heat that emanates between them because the other is a living space heater, the way how every time, without fail, the touch of Soap's lips makes his heart soar like a teenage girl's on prom night.

I love you, he mouths against the other, and even though his soundless words disappear into the air, at least he knows the universe will bear witness to this truth.

"My sergeant," the captain purrs adoringly, and it makes the blood rush faster in his veins. "Just don't know when to die, do you?"

Their foreheads touch, an unspoken moment of peace between them that they pretend will keep them safe.

They know that today, they are alive, but tomorrow may not bring such luck.

The arms around his middle move to his thighs as Soap stands up abruptly, hoisting Roach up with him and moving towards the side of the bed.

Roach grins, wrapping strong arms around the captain's neck, even as he's laid down on soft sheets.

Soap pulls him till they're flush together, with Roach's back to his chest, and the older snakes an arm around his front, resting a hand atop Roach's heart.

"Just to make sure you're still alive by mornin'," Soap had joked the first time he did it. But it was after Roach had taken a nasty stab to the lung, and the captain's fixation with feeling for his heartbeat had not been lost on the sergeant at all.

"In pain?" he asks softly into the crook of the Roach's neck.

The younger shakes his head, exhaling soft exasperation.

"Sorry. Just can't help but worry."

Roach knows how that feels.

He lets his eyes droop to a close, letting his hand climb atop Soap's, intertwining them so that they lock together solidly on his steady pulse.

He breathes in the captain's grounding, pine scent and hopes with every fibre of his being that they'll be okay in the morning—that after this shitstorm passes, they'll make it out the other end only slightly dishevelled.

He always did have plans to introduce Soap and Ghost to his family one day.

– – –

Later, with his mind drowsy and battling the final drops of wakefulness, he'll feel the bed dip beside him along with Ghost's hushed "All good?" and the captain's answering kiss that calms the lieutenant's concern.

He'll lay in bed, held by two people he loves with all his heart, who love him just the same, and he'll thank the world for granting him this rare moment of tranquillity.

Tomorrow, they'll be extracted for their next operation. They'll break into the gulag and find whoever this prisoner is that Makarov hates so much, and who knows what will happen?

But until then, Roach will sleep, knowing that the two things important to him are safe next to him.

– – –

Brown eyes hidden behind a screen of shade, and Roach wishes he could rip them off.

His body aches, as does his heart.

Price's shouts carry over his earpiece, and he can't help but feel bitter.

He wishes to hear his captain's voice one last time, wishes for once in his life, Simon didn't wear those blasted sunglasses. He wishes, so pathetically, that it didn't end like this, with one piece of himself dead beside him and the other miles away.

His mind grasps at threads, trying to find comfort in the gaps where pain has not yet sullied.

Despite how lonely he feels, staring at the face of an already dead lover, he'll thank any God above that he'll join him soon, that at least two of them are adjoined, even in death.

In a way, all three of them are together, connected by a commlink that spans the entire distance of their longing, like a tether.

It's such a sad, desperate pull at a sliver of comfort, but it quiets Roach's aching chest just a little.

There's the tang of Earl Grey tea leaves on his tongue, and as he closes his eyes for the last time, he can imagine that the smoke that suffocates his lungs tastes like Villa Clara's.

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fluffyprettykitty · 2 years

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Prompt me up!

"You're so warm" "I hear you but, but we really need to get up, love" (delightful domestic dialogue)

"I love it when you put your hands on me" (soft dirty talk sentence starters)

"I'm gonna make you scream my name" (the dirty kind of teasing)

with tony stark please? some morning action with him

oooh nice, nonnie, you went it with the prompts :) I also wanted to write some college tony for the fun :)

pairing: college tony stark x female reader

word count: 518 words

warnings: spit as lube, handjob, unprotected penetrative sex.

"You're so warm." You mumble and snuggle further into him. Your naked body felt so cold against his and your hands quickly pulled up to his face tilting his face towards yours. God, he looked so beautiful like that. Rosy cheeks, glistening eyes from all the previous activities, his breath hot against your mouth.

"I hear you but, but we really need to get up, love." He grins and nuzzles his nose against your face. The truth is you were both already late for your class and not only this but it was exam season after all, and maybe Tony could get away with it but really could you?

It wouldn't hurt if you tried though.

You sneaked one hand under the sheet and down his chest, a mischievous grin on your face, knowing exactly where you want to reach.

He chuckles looking at your determination to miss your exam and jeopardize your future but he doesn't stop you at all. He settles his head on the bed to angle your hand a little as is now has reached for his adonis belt. Your other hand now follows the same path and you rise a bit to climb on top of him, wrapping your legs against his knees and pushing your chest now on his.

"I love it when you put your hands on me." He grins and puts his hands on your hair softly petting them as you settle now on your knees pulling the sheet back with your body revealing your naked frame to him.

"Bet you love much more than just my little hands." You wink at him and wrap one hand around his cock, lining it up to your entrance. He was still semi-soft so you begin to work him on your hand slowly, settling on his legs.

"Oh, I love so many things about you and about you." He nods his head as he watches you spit on his cock and then spread it with your hand all over it. "I love everything about you."

"Good." You smirk at him and decide to start rubbing your pussy against his cock, slowly and sensually. He places his hands on your hips as he watches you work yourself on him, his cock now getting hard just for you.

"You can never get enough, can you?" He whispers looking at the way your hips sway on him, your one hand touching your breast.

"Not of your cock, no." You pout and finally push his tip inside your now very wet entrance.

"Greedy little girl..." He shakes his head, biting his bottom lip.

"Can you blame-" Your sentence is cut short by the moan that escapes your lips as you feel his thick cock stretching you out. His grip on your hips gets tight as he rises his body close to yours.

"I'm gonna make you scream my name." He muses, staring down. "I'm gonna make you ruin these sheets and this bed so bad." He shakes his head and that's how he takes control. Slapping sounds quickly filling the room followed by your breathy moans.

#selenes 1500 celebration #tony stark #tony stark x reader #tony stark drabble #tony stark smut #tony stark x fem!reader #tony stark x y/n #tony stark x you #tony stark fanfiction #tony x reader #iron man x reader #iron man smut #selene answers prompts

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rin-and-jade · 2 months

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Okay, so we've tried several times to write an ask, and each time we just..stop ?? So this time instead of explaining in detail n shit and saying how much we're sorry if this isn't appropriate to ask, I'm just gonna write :/

So, we're kind of stuck, in the sense that idk if I'm/we're(both pronouns feel wrong lol) a system anymore and,wdk what to do about it.

Because basically 5-6 years ago, when we were around 10(i think, but at this point i only know the story through the "telephone" of our retellings) our brain tried to just.. get rid of most of the DID. I'm not even ducking kidding, i think it tried to lower barriers and smush most of us together, to the best of it's ability. From what I've gathered, it planned on shoving all our trauma deep down in the innerworlds, and hiding them from the main kid. Like, getting rid of thousands of fragments, banking them in little crevices of our brain etc.

That procedure was supposed to make it so the main kid could have more of their life for them- without access or even knowledge of the sheer size of the abyss and pain in background, and thus being less affected by it till they were old enough to deal with it. Idk how to explain really, especially since i myself barely understand.

In any case, it went wrong. I don't know why much, as our memory has increasingly deteriorated since to the point i have nearly no knowledge left. I'm not sure even all that ever happened, because maybe I'm just inventing stuff and creating a story were there is none, and I'm scared that what i know isn't real and just my imagination or smth

And what's left is..me i guess. I kinda feel like a fragment in the sense that i have limited consciousness and just..person-space(if that makes sense ?) I'm not sure if I'm several people, one person, an eldritch entity of kinda seperate kinda not glued together entities.

Idek what i want to be. I want to be a full person, that's for sure, but other than that ? Idk. I'm lost, I'm a mix of tons of different opinions and vague, weak, feelings, and flashes of blurry memories and desires that don't belong to me.

So.. i know you probably can't help, but do you have.. any idea on what I could do ? Or if others have been in similar situations and if it got better ?

This is a very long ask x knows, and it's desperate, and you aren't our/my psychs so I shouldn't just dump this and hope you have answers, and I'm so sorry if this isn't appropriate to ask, but yeah.

I'm sorry.

Dissociative disorders do the job, but not perfectly, what you're explaining from the words of "nearly no knowledge left" sounds like retrograde amnesia, where it is near to impossible to remember anything from the past.

I also get a bit on what you mean with not knowing who you are,, that is usually close to a blurry moment? Because everything feels jumbled, its not clear, it is hard to discern wether there's multiple or not, etc. That could sound like it;

Have you been exposed to stress? Especially long term? Has anything awful been happening? Many factors can affect memory and recognizing who you are that can stem from basic needs that are neglected like sleep or rest if you're working for long periods, or deficiencies on vitamins/minerals/nutrition because they also play a part on fending off brain fog which can cause many issues like memory recall or trouble focusing,, or it can be to even deeper issues like stress as i said before, or if it is related to trauma, or any sustained physical injuries but it could be anything really.

Im guessing this is something that didn't happen in such a short time, but i do can give you some stuffs to do for starters:

Write down everything you can notice those feelings, those lingering sense of identity, or vibes, or thoughts, they are truly jumbled and it helps you organize and recognize your situation better if you have a physical record of what you're experiencing

Find the cause of problem If you can, try digging up anything you can find that could be the culprit, maybe before things get too foggy to remember that could serve as clues, and by checking with your current health (physically and mentally and emotionally) and see what could be fixed.

For sense of fulfillment It is overwhelming to know which or where you have to start from if you want to learn more of yourself, while you can do number 1 to jot down things you don't align with, this also gives you some ideas on what could be yours. Start somewhere small, like, how you like your daily morning, or preference in eating food, or the colors you think it looks cool.

It would also be great if you can leave out the tiniest bit of context next time, so my answers for now are rather vague and less pinpointed/specific. Though atleast still can suffice as a starting point to tackle your issues.

You can contact me anytime via ask box or DMs, let's see how things go for you okay?

- j

#did #actually did #did community #did osdd #did system #dissociative identity disorder #janswersask

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malboraslihan · 8 months

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hello friends <3 it's been a while since i posted a plotting call / interest post so i finally sat down today and wrote (more like assembled) plots / threads ideas i've been wanting to do. if you're interested in any of those LIKE THIS POST and i'll send you a message. just an important observation: we don't need to actually plot out most of these (some require working out details but that's it), if you want to write that plot with me just tell me which one and which muse you're interested and i'll write you a starter! so yeah basically, if you like any of those: * like the post * tell me which plot and which muse you want me to use (or which muse you think would work from your end so i can figure out who to use!) * i'll write you that starter

some need to knows... ig?

please do not worry about "making it fair" or anything like that, most of these plots are for my males and they're actual muses i want to develop so don't feel pressured to only choose one or all that.

on that same note, do not ask for a plot with one my girls just because you want one from my men. i honestly prepfer you pick plots you actually want to do instead of doubling threads and shit like that.

i'm open to plotting! but if we're gonna do it, i'd prefer we do it on discord cause the tumblr ims are always glitching to me and i keep losing tracks of things. so, if you wanna talk about things AND I'D LOVE TO, just lmk and i'll message you / give you my discord as well. (also, if we rp on discord and you wanna write some of these there, i'm obvs open<3)

these plots do not all need to be f/m ! i'm very open to make most of them f/f and while i'm a little more selective with who i write m/m plots, i'm willing to work things out if you have an idea :)

the bianchi reign

you're dating the mob boss / you're his sister / daughter and i'm his second in command but i can't stay away from you and you quickly realize it and we're flirting but if anyone finds out i'm dead

i'm infiltrating your gang to try and destroy it but we started sleeping together and it turns out there's feelings now but i just got an order to murder / kidnap you so now what

we were never close, i always thought you were annoying and now you fucked up big time on a mission and my father who's your boss wants to kill you but i marry you to stop him (insp)

i faked my own death to protect you/stop people from killing me/save our people and now three years later i send you a text asking you to meet me and at first you think it's a joke but then you come anyway and hi i'm alive (for noah!!!)

“we got framed for a crime we didn’t commit so now we’re on the run and having to kill and steal to survive and avoid arrest and now we really are dangerous criminals” au (maybe the crime was actually a fuck up inside the gang so now they're wanted <3) (for lorenzo or hazel)

the hawthorne family

you're dating my brother but he's constantly leaving you alone during events or even family trips to kiss my dad's ass and try to maintain his job so i keep you company until we're both drunk one night and i let it slip that i would love to kiss you

a plot where he’s a little too old for her but she doesn’t care. he thinks she’s immature and too reckless with her behavior. but she’s hellbent on proving him otherwise. so she applies for the position of his new personal assistant and he can’t help but appreciate her determination. of course he hires her but he does nothing short of giving her a hard time because this is her first job and she has no idea what she’s doing. but crap he finds her crying in the bathroom and his first instinct is to hold her and comfort her. he can’t believe he’s the cause of this and wises up fast. also maybe it has to do with his now urge to protect her. (for arthur)

not another rockstar by maisie peters.. just that toxic good old fangirl x stupid rockstar dynamic (for jean/hunter)

“you read one of my thirst tweets on a talk show and now my thirst is a minor internet sensation, so thanks for that” au (for hunter, jean)

‘we had a one night stand a couple of weekends ago and i really didn’t think i’d ever see you again but wow, now i’m sitting in your office interviewing for a job but all i can think about is the incredible s3x we had’ (for adam or arthur)

rich kids

a poly relationship, could someone who is just as rich as them or someone who isn't and they're spoiling the fuck out of them... someone who worked for one of them before or a friend idk (mostly for gigi, hunter and sara) (insp)

since i’m on a sugar baby phase imagine a plot where a college student is absolutely pampered by annoymous guy. all he asks in return is to be remained mysterious, occasion nudes, and all the attention he craves. she’s all too willing to give it for the pretty penny he’s offering. but her birthday comes around and he surprises her with a trip to see her favorite singer / actor with vip access / meet & oh hold a second, how does he know my name ? (for jean or hunter / hae park (nicha yontararak fc) / angel)

someone give me a thread where this rich dude falls for the normal down to earth girl nd introduces her to his world full of private jets nd yachts nd all that stuff and yES PLEASE

acotar/royal

we're fighting in different sides of a war and when we meet during a negotiation we find out we're mated

stuck in a mission together and we've always hated each other but then it's freezing cold and we have only one bed in this shitty cabin we're staying for the night so we should cuddle

you are supposed to get married to make peace between our countries/courts but we hate each other and we're constantly bickering and fighting and i think you might have actually tried to kill me once or twice (insp)

harbor springs

a plot based on ‘tis the damn season…. small town, childhood friends, one stayed put and the other moved away for college… now comes back for the holidays ten years later… pls

based on stick season by noah kahan: we were best friend since day one, dated during high school and broke up because you left for college / pursue your dreams and i stayed behind but one day i get a notification from you that you liked a photo or you shared a by pic and i liked and we just go back to talking and we're getting close again until you invite me to spend summer with you wherever you are and i actually been saving up money to leave town so i go and when i see you again i know i'm definitely still in love with you (for videl, keegan, ivy, patrick, angel, rani)

sports themed

(the nationals + tobias + gregory)

based on the trade by ki stephens: the hockey team has a tradition of trading dates during the end of season dinner and i invite you and make my best friend invite your roommate cause i wanna get with her but we actually start getting close and i fall in love with you but at the night of the dinner one of the guy spills everything (for benny or gael)

based on the deal by elle kennedy: i'll pretend i'm your boyfriend if you agree to tutor me and of course we fall in love (for benny, keegan or dane)

based on icebreaker by hannah grace: you hate hockey players and you say that to my face after i make a move on you so now i have to prove you wrong (bonus points if she's a figure skater and he has to help her after her partner bails or smt) (bonus points if they share the same rink so they're always bickering about late practices and shit) (for benny, keegan or gael)

he left his hometown to play professional and ended up breaking up with high school sweetheart because the distance and the busy schedule was just too much but a few years later he's won the superbowl and he's miserable and he meets her at some random party in his new town and wait she's engaged to someone else (for tobias, greg, benny, keegan)

plot where muse a is a star athlete on a professional team, and they go to a bar/pub after a great victory, where they meet muse b - a very attractive, bitter stranger wearing a fan jersey from the rival team.

a frat boy who’s like every normal frat boy. he drinks too much, he parties, and he sleeps with random girls but everything changes when he’s around the girl from back home. the girl that really matters to him. he doesn’t want to admit that he likes her a lot but, that’s what it comes down to when one of the guys in his frat house wants to hook up with her and she’s perfectly willing. (for benny or keegan)

horror plots

some spooky muses i made <3

muse a and muse b get stranded on a roadtrip and are offered a place to stay by a friendly looking local, only to find out they’re a serial killer looking to make them their next two victims. ( + bonus points if they’re exes who literally just broke up minutes before their car broke down??? the drama )

based on x, we're renting a farm house to film a college project / independent horror film / porn and one of our friends disappears on the first day and then our car disappears and now we don't know what to do cause there's no one around and the nearest stop was a forty minutes car drive away

i made you join a cult with me (recruited you / joined with you / made you join whatever) but now shit is happening and you're miserable and i can't bear to see you like this cause i actually grew too fond of you so i don't know what to do but i keep protecting you a little too much and people are going to realize at some point (for ubon or milo)

misc

popular girl x her best friend.. bonus points if the popular girl has a boyfriend or is constantly hooking up with different people (for ivy, giovana, madeline, rani)

church girl + unholy bf (for rani) and the opposite church boy + unholy gf (for jacob, videl)

lacy by olivia rodrigo: you're dating my ex boyfriend but i'm actually obsessed with you and not really sorry that i lost him. (bonus points if they're in the same friend group) (for giovana, madeline, anastasia, grace, hazal, saja)

i really want a plot based two weeks ago by maisie peters.. the whole vibe of being in love with someone and have it finally happen before they need to get on a plane and go somewhere else? really want to explore the long distance relationship situation with all the jealousy and missed calls, timezones that don’t match (for literally anyone.. but some that i could see this working with are: jacob, videl, benny thompson, gigi, rani, ivy, pinar)

i'm pretty sure my husband/boyfriend is cheating on me so i go out to do the same but i can't just sleep with a random but then i meet you, my long time friend and we end up talking and laughing until i kiss you and we hook up but now i'm trying to work things out with my husband/boyfriend but i can't stop thinking about you (insp) (for anastasia, fatma, grace, nari / arthur, finnley, keegan, tobias)

“your ex hired me to make you fall in love with me then break your heart but oops i think i fell in love and now i’m conflicted what the fuck is happening i’m supposed to hurt you ow what am i sUPPOSED TO DO” (for gigi, gael, theo hughes (kaden h fc))

he fucked up big time but he never forgot about her and was constantly trying to fix their relationship until at some point he gives up and that's when she finally texts back / shows up at his door (for jacob, patrick, videl, arthur / hazal, verda) insp

a nice, shy, nerdy boy who literally no one pays attention to asks the popular, outgoing, ray of sunshine out and she was so confused and didn’t think he meant it at first but she agrees anyway because she doesn’t want him to feel bad because she sees that he really tried so hard to ask her out? and maybe it didn’t work out so well at first but he tries again anyway? it doesn’t work a few times because of her schedule but he’s really sweet so she agrees to another more because it wouldn’t hurt and by the end of the date he works up the courage to ask if he could kiss her and she reluctantly says okay - and completely underestimates him but holy shit that wasn’t a chaste kiss? and before she knows it her clothes are on the floor and he’s fucking her like a whore but she’s so intO IT? (for sebastian aka my luke hemmings fc muse)

accidentally swapped phones with someone at a party and don’t realize until their mom calls in the morning and you spend like three hours talking to this hilarious woman about life and when you go to her house to return her kid’s phone wow the kid is the really good kisser from the party last night au (for maddie, videl, benny, aurora, tobias)

we dated in high school, i wrote a book about you five years later and now you’re at a fan event asking for an autograph.. (for the writer: maddie / for the ex: benny, benny hawthorne, tobias, videl)

“i’ve lost my memory and idk who you are but i just have this feeling that i’m supposed to trust you” (for arthur, videl, jacob)

“i’m in love with you and i just watched you get proposed to by your boyfriend right before my eyes and now i’m upset” (for jacob, patrick, keegan)

before trilogy inspired: we were the only ones waiting for a train but it was delayed for twelve hours / our next flight connection is not until tomorrow and we just decide to walk around the city and we end up kissing, i like you too much and i don't wanna lose this but it's time to go and we make a pact to come back here next month but we never actually do for different reasons and then 3/5/10 years later we meet again somewhere else.. (for ivy, rani, hunter or saja)

#so ! it took me ages to finally write this down but it's here HELLO #there's actually a few muses that i haven't been able to use and i want to so.. they're all around this list #it got long.. i'm sorry #but i also tried to separate by theme/verse so it's easier?#or idk if it actually makes it easier but oh well.#i just needed some “pre plotted” threads cause i've been missing them #so ig here it it #sorry for any gramma errors i just word vomitted and did not proof read anything #i'll shut up now #wanted plots

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kyojurismo · 1 year

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🪼 welcome to my 1k followers celebration !

a/n : first of all, i wanna say thank you so much from the bottom of my heart! i’m forever grateful for all the people who take their time to read my work, to show a bit of support and to even interact with me. i consider myself your friendly neighbourhood writer, someone you meet casually, but it’s up to you to decide whether staying or walk forward — what the . . ? ANYWAY, this is my first time doing a celebration, and i’m really excited hehe, so yeah if you wanna know more keep reading ^_^

opening period : well, the celebration starts today ( JULY 10TH ) and finish on ( JULY 16TH ), so have fun and please don’t send anything related to the celebration after this date or else they’ll get deleted. once again, thank you !!! ♡

let’s chat : alright, if you wanna get to know me better, whether you’re curious or just bored, you can send me as many questions as you want and i’ll gladly answer them so we can get more cozy. i’m very shy and i usually tend to mind my own business, but i said this a lot: i love interacting with people. so yeah . . . this is your chance to discover how annoying i am & ask my opinions about literally anything >_<

grab your pen : i write after all, so we’re here thanks to this i guess. here you can find a bunch of lists about different prompts & scenarios you can use to send a request ( for short pieces so it will be easier for me ) to celebrate this milestone.

🪼 RULES BEFORE YOU REQUEST SOMETHING

— nsfw pieces only if you’re 17+ !

— for this, i accept request only about reader x character(s) — i accept fem, male and gender neutral readers.

— the fandom i write for are: kimetsu no yaiba, jujutsu kaisen and spy x family. if you wanna know for which characters in particular, check this post or simply try your luck by sending a character anyway ^_^

— remember to tag the request with 1K CELEBRATION, so it doesn’t get confusing.

— write the full prompt please, not only the number / letter.

🪼 PROMPT LISTS

— affectionate gestures

— fluffy scenarios

— kiss prompts

— super soft intimacy

— protective prompts

— height difference prompts

— soft prompts

— excuses to hold hands

— short angst sentence starters

— soft angst sentence starters

— inexperienced smut prompts

— smutty prompts

— subtle smut sentence starters

— bdsm & dom/sub smut prompts

— five senses prompts

🪼 1K CELEBRATION RELATED STUFF

— fluffy scenario [ sanemi shinazugawa x gn!reader ]

— “you’re gonna be fine. just stay awake for a little longer, help’s already on their way.” [ sanemi shinazugawa x gn!reader ]

— “i swear to you, that as long as i'm alive i won't let a single soul ever harm you.” [ ryomen sukuna x fem!reader ]

— “the way their eyes crinkle when they smile.” [ tengen uzui x gn!reader ]

— back hugs [ sanemi shinazugawa x gn!reader ]

— “i’ll be back very soon, but don’t come out. stay there hidden until i come back and try not to make a noise, hmm?” [ tanjiro kamado x gn!reader ]

— kisses to keep your lover quiet during sex [ kyojuro rengoku, tengen uzui, giyu tomioka x gn!reader ]

— napping together [ yuji itadori, megumi fushiguro, suguru geto, ryomen sukuna x gn!reader ]

— feeding you their cooking and hoping you’ll like it [ sanemi shinazugawa x gn!reader ]

— “first one to make noises loses.” [ obanai iguro x fem!reader ]

— sliding hands under their clothes [ lady tamayo x gn!reader ]

— playing with their hair until they fall asleep [ giyu tomioka x gn!reader ]

— going in for a kiss and either bumping noses or foreheads [ kyojuro rengoku x gn!reader ]

#🪼 — 1k celebration !!#🍧 — navigation !!

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onlythebravest · 8 months

Text

✨️ Twenty Questions for Fic Writers ✨️

Thank you @disgruntledkittenface for tagging me! These questions things are always so fun to read and answer!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

37.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

212 726

3. What fandoms do you write for?

rigt now, 1D and hockey rpf. I've written for harry potter and acotar before though

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

in order; never been a fan of change, but we're still the same, in the pub that we met he's got his arms around you, dream about a summer night, a conversation starter and these arms were made for holding you

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

yes! almost always. for different reasons. as a reader, I always enjoy getting replies to comments I've left. it also motivates me to leave more comments, esp on that author's fics. that's just how I work. and since I like and want that, I assume it's the same for other ppl so I do that to them. it's also bc getting comments sometimes makes my entire day, and it makes me so happy, and I want to let them know that

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i'm not sure i've written anything with an angsty ending? oh wait, two of my older mini fics do. the loss of a friend and what are we now? both have pretty angsty endings, or at least not happy ones. so i'll go with them.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

the rest of them? no, but I prefer happy endings so I think almost all of the rest have. all of my top five kudos ones that I mentioned above are the first ones I'd pick, so take your pick among those. but if I were to pick another one... most of the rest are kinda happy throughout the entire fic and then the ending doesn't feel as happy. so to pick one that's not happy throughout, but has a happy ending, I'll go with maybe we're good, maybe we're not.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

no, i don't. i've gotten some rude comments, but that's as far as it's gotten luckily

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes, i've written a little. it's still a bit out of my comfort zone though, esp posting it, but i've written some m/m smut of different variants.

10. Do you write crossovers? What the craziest one you've written?

no. or well, technically yes, but it's an abandoned wip that i don't like so that's all you're gonna get about it

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not as far as i'm aware, so i hope not

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

nope. I was part of a round robin, but that got abandoned and I vowed never to do it again. group projects are not my thing 😂

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I don't think I have one. I change favorites so often, so I don't think I can say I've got an all-time fave

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

oh multiple! I have one that I do doubt I'll ever finish but I still hope I will so so much, so I'm not gonna give up on that one just yet. instead, I have one that's even less likely I'll finish. it's a fantasy one, enemies to lovers (I should've known it was doomed already then, that's not my thing), magic that was based around elements. it's main feature is that it has a "who did this to you?" between two ppl who don't like each other, which is something I love. maybe I'll end up publishing only that scene, it can be read as a stand-alone so it's not that bad of an idea actually

16. What are your writing strengths?

dialogue, I think. specifically banter, I think I'm pretty good at that. I always manage to write it in at least and have a lot of fun writing it!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I feel like I write pretty short sentences, making paragraphs sound a bit choppy. I'm also an expert in writing english sentences with swedish grammar, so I feel for my beta that has to correct that shit. esp when the sentence doesn't even make sense in English and it's a guessing game😂

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

if it's important to the plot, then yeah, that could be nice. but it's a bit of a pet peeve of mine when i read dialgoue in swedish and it's obvious that the author has used google translate, it bothers me. i'd rather read it in english with an accompanying "says in swedish" rather than the inaccurate translation. but that's probably bc it's my native language. when it's in languages i don't understand i don't have that issue obviously.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

harry potter probably? at least that I posted for, might've written something that I didn't realise was technically for fandom when I was younger

20. Favorite fic you've written?

oh, hm... right now it's probably a tie between does it always end in heartbreak? and maybe we're good, maybe we're not. but that's probably bc those are the latest ones I published. one favorite I always mention is one of the drabbles in the drabble collection snapshots of moments, the one in chapter 11, pretty when you beg

Since this was the first one I saw of these, I'm not sure who has done them, but I'll tag @greenfeelings, @neondiamond, @larrysballetslippers, @lunarheslwt, @sun-lt, @hellolovers13, @zjofierose and @zanniscaramouche. oh and if you see this and want to do this, just say I tagged you because I want to read it!

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thotsforvillainrights · 5 months

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sorry if this is a weirdly specific request but could you write a scenario where Overhaul reacts to reader getting a drastic haircut? thank you <3

(It's specific but that's what makes it so fun to think about!)

~Kai's reaction to S/O's new cut~

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up|drabble

(May not apply to every reader but let's say you get a new haircut or even a wig or something, new dye job? Anything different from what you currently have for this one!)

"Sick of this...why is it always something new with the authorities around here?" He complains as he furiously taps his pen on his desk and reads over the paperwork again and again. Kurono sitting on the couch nearby is cleaning his guns when he lets out a short burst of air from his nose. "Well for starters, they got some new folks up there trying to make a name for themselves. Obviously they're not gonna have the same respect as the old ones had for our group." He replies and Chisaki rolls his eyes. "Respect huh? That's a funny way to refer to fear. Be that as it may, I don't have time to assert my place for these novices today. It's almost 3 and I have to go pick up Y/N. Take over for me." Hari nodded shortly as Kai stood up and grabbed his jacket on the way out. His mind seemed to find some peace the closer he got to the salon. It was your effect on him...his personal medicine for the worst or even most stressful of days. Seeing on look at your face would help calm any problems he-

What?

He squints and watches closely as you walk to the counter and begin paying. At least it looked a lot like you but your look was different. He was starting to convince himself maybe some sort of doppelganger until he got the notification on his phone that his credit card was swiped at the salon. You glanced over and noticed him parked just outside the window. It really cemented that this was you by the way you cheerfully waved at him with that goofy smile. He remained silent when you walked outside and got into the car. His expression didn't really help to reassure you about your new look and neither did his silence. As the time passed in the car ride home you were becoming more and more offended he didn't even bring it up. Meanwhile he was busy searching for the right words to say to you.

It's not that he didn't like it. It's just that he was having a time trying to suddenly adjust to the change. In his defense, he'd seen you the same way for the longest now. You were spontaneous about many things but this wasn't one of them (depending on reader of course). However, he knew he loved you. He also knew you were very attractive to him no matter what you did so he settled on letting you know how he felt when the two of you made it home and parked in the driveway. He might've been too late when he looked over at you and noticed your body language. You were distanced from him, leaning toward the car door and sulking as though the two of you had an argument. You were starting to regret experimenting when you felt a gentle gloved hand reach out and touch your knee. You looked over to him and listened as he began to finally speak. "My apologie angel, my mind has been occupied with work all day." He lied but you didn't have to know that. He was actually taking time to respond in his own way. "I find this new style of yours to be...interesting to say the least. Anyhow, it doesn't matter what me or anyone else thinks as long as you're happy. Personally you already know what I'd do to someone that made you feel insecure about anything, correct?" You flash a small sad smile and nod slowly.

"And...although I'm not sure how to put it, I know it makes you happy. If you're happy then there's no way I can't be. Besides, I admire the bravery it took for you to try something new. Perhaps I need to start doing so as well?" He smiled beneath the mask and you chuckled lightly. "Does this mean you'll grow your stubble out again?" You asked with hopeful eyes. He scoffed immediately.

"No way in Hell."

#bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #overhaul #kai chisaki #scenario

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pompadorbz · 2 years

Note

you obivously like taka but what do your think of ishda both as a concept and in the story proper

Ok prepare yourselves for this one, because I need to go on a full-scale rant and analysis over this actually. I think that Ishida is perhaps one of the most WASTED concepts I have EVER seen in my life. There are so many directions he could've gone in as a character and the writers decided that the best option was for him to just stop at a screeching halt before he ever got even a MOMENT to gain momentum. It's a decision that both angers and fascinates me, because not only is it shrugging off an entire character for practically no good reason, but ALSO, there's even some table scraps of evidence pointing to the possibility that he was meant to have even just a LITTLE more to his character. For starters, he not only has unused gift dialogue for when you give him a present before a free-time event, but an entire (albeit INCREDIBLY short) event.

Meaning that at some point, there was likely going to be more of an attempt to flesh him out that they just didn't end up going through with. Another thing that will forever fuck with me, is. Why does this splash art exist?

Like it's cool. It's raw as hell. But what reason does it exist? Like really think about it for a moment here. Ishida as a character doesn't have much more than. I'd say about 1-2 hours of screen time. And this isn't a Syo kind of situation, either. Syo appears fairly early on and then CONTINUES to front on multiple occasions. No offense to my guy Ishida but he literally eats dirt and then dies. SO WHY DOES HE HAVE AN ENTIRE PIECE OF SPLASH ART?? AND WHY IS HE WEILDING MONDO'S PICKAXE? AN ITEM THAT HE NEVER RECIEVES (and if I recall correctly, you only ever see in the chapters FOLLOWING his death)??? Why go through all the effort for a character that is around for only a tiny portion of the game if there weren't MORE PLANS for him initially? And like. No matter how you choose to look at Ishida's existence there is always SOMETHING that just doesn't add up or is never explained. Is he possessed? Or is this just a really poor coping mechanism? If its the latter, then why does his hair turn white? Why do his eyes light on fire? If it's the former, then why is the fact that A GUY GOT POSSESSED BY A REAL ACTUAL GHOST NEVER EXPLAINED, NOR EXPLORED??? Really, the only thing Ishida is used for is just a quick fix to nearly everything left unaddressed in chapter two's climax. A band-aid over a bullet wound. SO IM GONNA PERFORM FUCKING SURGERY RIGHT BEFORE YOUR EYES. CHECK THIS SHIT OUT. I'M GONNA WRITE A BETTER ISHIDA, AND BY PROXY, A BETTER CONCLUSION TO KIYOTAKA RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW (spoilers: I literally cannot think of a SINGLE way for him to die that doesn't work to the detriment of any other character. I am a firm believer that for his character to even WORK to a well written degree without using other characters as fodder, he needs to end up in the survivor roster)!!! This isn't gonna be like. INCREDIBLY detailed, um. I'd love to write this in full form someday but for now I'm gonna just do a sort of synopsis. BUT FIRST!! I need to talk about Kiyotaka as a character and the silly, funny, and interesting little things that are done to establish him because weirdly, Kiyotaka has this like, air of importance to him for both the first and second chapter. Like I might even go as far as to say that he could've been written as a red herring for BOTH the chapter 1 and 2 murder trials if the writers really wanted to go in that direction. Ok so with the prologue and chapter one, obviously every character is going to be given at least a little bit of time to have their base personalities established, and Taka isn't exempt from that by any means. He honestly gets a LOT more establishment than others in this chapter since he ends up becoming this sorta de-facto leader of the group right off the bat (and btw, I don't consider his eventual downfall and death to be a subversion of his character by any means. To me, a subversion implies that there's going to be at least some sort of attempt to tie in the subversion to his previous actions somehow, and no effort is made here. Chapter one already gives a great character subversion of the childhood friend trope with Sayaka, so if Kiyotaka's death is meant to be a subversion of his own character trope, then I'd say that it's comparatively much weaker). Kiyotaka even ends up being the one to set the morning meetings into action, which Is kept up for the entire rest of the game with little to no breaks in that formula if I recall correctly? Can you believe it guys. He started that. He started that and nobody thanked him. Anyway.

Then in chapter 2, things start to get a bit inch resting. The obvious one is Kiyotaka becoming friends with Mondo to then set up the events of the trial and how they relate back to Mondo, while simultaneously not making the culprit and victim completely obvious. Which by the way. Mondo's friend didn't necessarily HAVE to be Kiyotaka. It could've worked with multiple other characters but they chose SPECIFICALLY Kiyotaka. Absolutely fucked up. Anyway. The OTHER thing that happens to establish Kiyotaka in chapter two is. This.

fucking!!! oopsie!!! I fucking guess!!! Kiyotaka is the one to suggest revealing the secrets, which other than Monokuma himself dropping the motive, ends up being the domino that sets the entirety of chapter two's murder in motion. In a really fucked up in evil way, you could technically say that Taka blaming himself for Chihiro and Mondo's death actually has some merit if you pin it back to this! Fun! I think something about the second chapter that I don't see people discuss a lot is that while Kiyotaka is obviously being put into horrible grief over Mondo and Chihiro's deaths, blaming himself for both and even going as far as to vote for himself due to the amount of responsibility he feels, there's also this underlying second. thing. That I think acts as the nail in the coffin for his entire mental state once chapter 3 rolls around. Kiyotaka is somebody who at his core, has an INCREDIBLY black and white understanding of morality as a whole. In his mind, a person is either good, or they're bad. With him befriending Mondo, we see his morality take its very first major deviation. Almost. Mondo is somebody that Kiyotaka considered to be wholly bad at FIRST, but upon learning how similar the two of them were, he came to the conclusion that he made a lapse in his judgement, and that Mondo was actually wholly good. And THEN he commits real actual murder. Kiyotaka JUST made a friend for the very first time, and now he's learning that said friend committed murder. But not only did he commit murder, he committed ACCIDENTAL murder, and is still being punished. Meanwhile, Togami, someone who tampered with Chihiro's corpse for the sillyfunnies, and Syo, a wanted serial killer, BOTH go free completely unscathed, lacking any sort of further consequence for their actions. So not only is Kiyotaka in a state of heavy and immediate grief, but in addition to all that, his entire perception of morality as he knows it, and the BASIS for how he's lived his ENTIRE LIFE, has just crumbled in front of him in under an hour. This bad boy can fit so much PAIN and CONFUSION. This was so life shattering that I will once again remind you- he was suddenly willing to give up his, AND everybody else's lives to let Mondo go free. AND THIS IS ALL JUST TO PREFACE THE ISHIDA STUFF!!! So now we've hit chapter 3. I think pretty much everything goes as it does up until Kiyotaka becomes Ishida. THEN there are some substantial changes. I figure to start, I could think up a fun little reason for Ishida's hair to be white, although it's really just a metaphor. Once again, bro's entire understanding of morality has just crumbled, and I think that in his head, he tries to justify where he went wrong. Instead of just being the Mondo-possessed Kiyotaka, I think he becomes more determined than ever to fix the mistake that he 100% swears he must've made for chapter 2 to transpire the way it did. He begins to believe that he must've been acting too much out of pure logic, and that he should instead switch gears to a more emotional way of thinking through issues, hence his hair going from black to white. it's cute (it's also a nod to this lil line here).

When it comes to the chapter 3 murder, I think that Kiyotaka is vocal enough about his change of heart that Celeste susses him out in no time flat, and realizes that he's in a very vulnerable and easy to manipulate state. I think that he essentially swaps places with Hifumi here, and she's able to convince Ishida that Hifumi plans to hurt alter ego, or rather, that he hurt Celeste in one way or another. She's able to sniff out that Kiyotaka still feels spite towards everybody else, so if he can be convinced that she is the only good person left in this entire killing game (or grow a bond to Celeste), then he could end up helping her commit her murder. Except I don't think he needs to be convinced that he'd be making an escape with her (I didn't mention how he was willing to vote for himself in chapter 2 for no good reason). Rather, I think that he would play the roll of a red herring in the trial along with an unwilling Hiro, pretending to be the murderer as a last resort to cover Celeste's tracks. However at some point I think he would end up slipping (possibly in a similar fashion to how Mondo did with the colour of the tracksuit, which also ties to Celeste's own account, funnily enough), and that ultimately leads to Celeste's death. In Ishida's mind, i think he feels like he'd failed a second time to keep someone he cared about alive. He doesn't catch onto him being manipulated to begin with until later I think. Chapter 4 rolls around and I think things start to calm down, BUT. I think he remains INCREDIBLY silent during the entire thing, maybe only making a comment or two during the trial. I think as the truth gets slowly revealed it's like looking in a mirror. A. Very Hina shaped mirror. Watching somebody else also go to incredibly extreme lengths for the sake of someone they care about and trust strikes SUCH a chord, I think. It's perfect timing for alter Ego's execution to happen as well, I think. It's all a giant metaphor for something, probably. Anyways the reason I didn't go into depth with chapter 4 is because. There is a fic that I love that does that already. When I read it I was in a voice call and I had to refrain from actually losing it because it just??? happened to share a brain cell with me??? thank god??? Anyways it's called Stage 3: The Chrysalis (Also Known as Pupa) and it changed me forever. Go read it. That's an order. BUT ANYWAY after chapter 4 ends I think Kiyotaka would be fully back in form (now complete with emotional damage but hes working on it), and he'd end up taking a backseat so that the major endgame plot stuff can kick into high gear. Him and Hina are best friends now (real), and Ishida as a concept is fixed. This took like two hours to write, Spike Chunsoft should hire me so that I can write them a better game.

#syd spiels #backtalk #danganronpa #danganronpa thh #danganronpa 1 #danganronpa trigger happy havoc #kiyotaka ishimaru #ishimaru kiyotaka #i wrote an entire essay of course it's going into the tags #who else is gonna get this guy into the top characters on tumblr in 2023 if not me????#kiyondo ishida #ishida kiyondo #its 1 am goodnight

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blu3-f1nch · 7 months

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Would you mind sharing what your version of Cherubim/Venomania’s story is?

[EXPAND ME, ART!!]

There's uh.. A lot to share here lmao- I'm so sorry this is gonna be kinda long, but a summary nonetheless. My body horror drawings of him are not a part of this canon.

Short answer; Many of the original themes of the story made me deeply uncomfortable so I didn't just re-write Cherubim, I re-wrote 90% of the universe and Cherubim just ended up being my hyperfixation. Yes he is still a lust demon, but lust doesn't always = s-x, it can also mean strong desires, his strong desire was freedom. Boom.

[Anatomy of the "False Angel" design can range heavily as he's essentially a shapeshifter. He can't just turn into random animals though-- I just mean that its anatomy can range from almost weasel like to humanoid.]

Long answer: For starters.. I re-wrote a lot of the universe, I wasn't super deep into the entire world and didn't want to spend more time reading the wiki than I already had (I'd been reading it for a few days trying to find specific information).

I re-wrote and/or added a lot of the gods, made an entire ranking system for the demons of the world, changed a lot of the lore- and really only did this because I was uncomfortable with one silly little purple haired mans' themes that led me into a week long spiral.

So for starters, his youth is much the same but is changed slightly. He wasn't born with any sort of facial deformation as I'm a tad uncomfortable with portraying characters who do abhorrent things because of a deformation/disability. Not to say people can't write these themes, I just was not comfortable with it under this context. Instead, he was born out of an affair, this he was known about to the public to some minor extent, but very little was known about him and he was kept out of the public eye out of shame. So he still didn't leave the castle much. [I do not have any concepts of him as a kid]

At one point he did have a taste of freedom, leaving the castle with his brother, as the two actually had grown up around one another and were rather close. They did this many times and Cherubim got to feel what it was like to have real friends outside of the guards and maids he spoke to, since his parents paid him little attention. He was caught however and after this was just kept in his room, rarely able to leave. He grew bitter and resentful, angry at his parents, angry at the world. He was just a confused kid. He had this deep desire to be free, so no one else could control him. These wishes attract a kind of demon known as an affiant. Hers [I call them Heirs] don't exist here in the same way that they do in the original work, they are something different. An Affiant is someone who has made a contract with an item of sin, so a human turned demon. Heirs are still born as purely beings of evil, but they have a bit of a different purpose. Anywho, aside from that, the Clockwork doll works differently here too. The original demon sealed within the doll has awoken and controls its body, though it still has much of its magic locked away. The Doll wasn't always this way but that doesn't matter. The doll was drawn to Cherubim for his deep desire for freedom and begun to speak to him, and over the course of a few years- until about his mid-teens, where they introduce the idea of forging a contract with a demon to get what he desires; Freedom. [I also do not have any concepts of the clockwork doll yet]

Cherubim is very off-put by this, he is not comfortable with this idea, and starts backing away from the clockwork doll, who is not pleased by this. She stabs Cherubim with the venom sword, forcing him to make a contract with the demon. In his initial moments, he had zero control over himself. He transformed into a being that would be dubbed "The False Angel," with the demon mostly in control at this point, it slaughtered the royal family. Cherubim was all that was left behind, going back to his normal form he would pass out. He doesn't remember much of these events, but he too was pinned as a victim; A fortunate survivor of some bloodthirsty demon who came in and slaughtered the royal family.

It has been many years since then, he's now 27. My take on lust is not lust in the sexual manor, but a deep desire for freedom, freedom through the acquisition of power and being above all others. However, because of the re-write I made of the lust demons powers, he more feeds off of emotions of the people around him, so keeping his people happy is incredibly advantageous to him. For this, he's generally admired by the public while at night he slaughters other demons not to protect his own people- but to acquire their power as well. He's actively seeking out the other vessels to gain their power as well. He's very self-serving in this AU, but not a straight up s-x offender (makes me deeply uncomfortable lmao) So here's my description of the Venom sword and the powers it gives its affiant: "The Venom sword -- is a katana with purple runes inscribed on the weapons blade, and the weapon itself is able to shift and change its appearance to any weapon of the users choice. In order to make a pact with this demon, one must be impaled by the sword, which leaves a scar that persists through any disguise the user takes on. It allows the user to change their face, body build, sex, etc- though again the scar remains. And much like a few of the other vessels, it allows the user to take on a more demonic appearance that is unique to each user, though often reflects one aspect of the original demon's appearance when it wasn't stuck within the vessel. This demonic form is extremely strong, and is when the user is most powerful. The lust demon also grants the ability to manipulate the memories of others, as well as the emotions they feel. They feed off of the emotions of the people around them, and sometimes other people's emotions make it difficult for the user to retain composure and their typical mannerisms. They must feed off of others emotions to replenish their magic. Feelings of happiness, excitement, bliss, etc give the user the strongest boost."

Sorry if any of this didn't make sense, it's 8 AM and I'm sick lmao-- I didn't proof read.

original drafting/Older design

This design felt too "human" to me, and so I started going with a more harpy/feline-like feel. This creature is supposed to resemble an angel, but something is supposed to be completely wrong about it. I don't feel like I hit the mark on this one, and I don't particularly like these drawings anymore- kinda got made fun of over them but I like them enough to share.

Clothing stuff I never finished or colored, one of my friends had me make a furry design for him lmao The gold and indego/purple theme is what I have for his clothes, and I'm thinking about changing his hair color. It'll be purple still, but it'll lean more towards magenta like in that one body horror drawing I did.

Here's the last of it, I don't have a whole lot of art of these designs honestly, I haven't fixated on him again and have been in bad art burnout-- just trying to focus on commissions and my OCs.

But yes, he doesn't go by Sateriasis Venomania because he never stole his brothers identity/had the memory fuge.

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