#No more Eternal hell because Humans can't take it

[kimdokja-real]

Fuck I Fell Asleep and Forgot to Put the Links to the INfo in the Prev Post

Here

Sources:

Yeah Pocket Watch.

Btw think this suits Kim Dokja

O living God! You broke the tomb in glory Death could not hold the one who authored life! His radiant light has shattered through our darkness And in our hearts, his risen life now shines

He Died so many times

Upon a life I did not live Upon a death I did not die— Another’s life, Another’s death I stake my whole eternity.

Where will your eternity be spent? Will it be spent in the new heaven and the new earth wherein dwelleth righteousness? I trust every reader of this article will be there “living happily ever after!”

He Created Heaven, A Happy Ending for Everyone But Himself.

[radiance1]

Vlad owns a bakery.

It is, however, on the very downlow. The CEO of a massively successful corporation being known as the owner of a mere bakery would make it far too easy for people to access him, which would then lead to him having to hire people to keep said people who didn't come for the bakery out and that would just really ruin the mood.

On the other hand, he's also keeping it a secret from the Fenton family, he doesn't need them trying to install their 'defense systems' into his bakery because first of all, he already had his own. Second of all he's strong enough that most ghosts don't even want to try him and he could take care of any normal human and thirdly, he doesn't want that bumbling fool to bust down his walls because he can't grasp the concept of a door.

His bakery is successful, not enough to be famous, but he has a steady selection of customers. He doesn't want his bakery to be famous either, he would prefer to keep a good pool of regulars that were nice and calm.

After all, money is never an issue.

Of course, he has a few part timers, who he pays handsomely for their time.

Simple logic really.

More money = happy = greater efficiency.

Of course, Vlad knows that he's overpaying them more than the normal amount, but does he care?

No.

Because after all, as he has said.

Money is never an issue.

Recently, there's been a man by the name of Constantine coming by his bakery, who came at first by recommendation, took one of his items, paid and then left.

Then came back a few days later, then when Vlad showed himself from inside his kitchen and personally took the guy's order (his usual part timer called in sick) and the guy seemed to stare at him for a second too long, before getting his stuff and leaving.

Then the time he visited became shorter.

And shorter.

Until he was visiting daily.

Constantine seemed to have a certain... interest, in Vlad whenever he was around, and of course, Vlad noticed. Why wouldn't he?

Now, Vlad normally wouldn't have the time nor want to respond to the crushes of people he couldn't care less about, especially when he had Maddie. But, after recently accepting that Maddie has no interest in him and finally deciding to let that obsession that was fueled by spite, pettiness and some misguided feelings go.

Well, you could say he had time.

And Constantine wasn't displeasing to the eye.

===

There was a demon masquerading as a normal man in this bakery.

Constantine was sure of it, the bakery owner didn't feel human, and Constantine could tell from a glance that he wasn't. He wasn't exactly expecting it though, going to a bakery after the one he actually liked shut down due to financial problems, and then finding its owner to be a demon.

He was surprised to say the least, as well as disappointed, because after dealing with the demon in disguise the bakery would most probably shut down.

Except, the owner wasn't going around secretly killing people in the dark or torturing their minds or making them his eternal servants. In fact, he seemed to be treating them well, if what he gathered was correct.

They had a far higher pay than a part timer would normally have, they could call in sick and Vlad would accept that, even say that they just couldn't show up or feel mentally able to do their job that day and Vlad wouldn't care, wouldn't fire them, just tell them to come in when they can.

Weird, for a demon.

So, Constantine stayed his hand.

But he was waiting, waiting for that mask to slip up juuuuust the tiniest bit, make the wrong move, and then Constantine would send him back to hell where he originated from.

It would be shame, the treats he cooked were delectable and completely and utterly normal. But he could just find another bakery to eat at.

Although probably not as good.

[hamliet]

Hazbin Hotel Has Better Theology Than Most Modern "Christian" Stories

As a Christian who was raised in a fundie cult and escaped to now have a far healthier and vital faith, I genuinely really like this show. The songs are bops. The characters are well crafted and interesting, and likable too. The art design is bizarre but appealing.

And, as a theology nerd who studied theology as part leaving said cult and also has since gotten papers published in theology, I'm actually fairly impressed by the show's handling of theology.

No, I'm not expecting the story to preach or even like, be explicitly Christian in a lot of ways. But it's taking a lot of the really beautiful aspects of Christian theology and re-contextualizing them in a way designed to provoke thought: by juxtaposing them with the antithesis of what you would think, by making demons heroes. In my opinion, this makes the beauty shine brighter.

Yeah, yeah, it's designed to be offensive and obscene in a lot of ways. Yet, it's never (thus far) mean-spirited. On the contrary, it seems to have a big, beating heart at its core that is perhaps best embodied by Charlie Morningstar, its protagonist and the daughter of Lucifer and Lilith.

Critique of the Church, with Caveats

The story works best with an interpretation that heaven isn't actually heaven or God (who has been conspicuously absent), but instead as a critique of the church. Specifically, the evangelical American church, and specifically, white evangelicals. (Same as She-Ra's premise, actually).

God's absence therefore makes sense, because while Christians do believe God is present as a living reality among us, we also can't like, see him physically now. So, God being not even mentioned in HH makes it seem more like a mortal reality rather than an immortal one. Honestly I kinda hope God doesn't appear in the story, not only because I think it could cross some lines (which is admittedly personal), but also because I don't see that the story really needs it.

Adam in particular reminds me of every "theobro" on Twitter (I'm not calling it what you want me to, El*n). Basically a dudebro coopting his supposed salvation to flex in an often misogynistic way, who doesn't realize that he has absolutely no love in him and therefore is actually a worse human being than everyone he condemns on the regular.

(Which is kind of why I'm expecting Adam to wake up in hell next season...)

Think red hats. And Mark Driscoll. And, I have a list of pastors. Sigh. They advocate for how "simple" Christianity is, except they themselves make it ridiculously complicated and don't even examine what they suppose is "simple" if it requires them to take the planks out of their own eyes. "Shallow" is a better description of what they actually preach.

But what sends people to hell or heaven anyways?

Eschatology and Atonement Theory

Hazbin Hotel combines a lot of theories, throwing not only the idea of a physical hell (albeit mixed with Dante's idea of what hell is the Inferno, but to be fair a lot of the church has adopted that idea too) but the idea of annihilation, which HH calls "extermination."

See, in Christianity, there's a lot of debate about hell. Like, since 2000 years ago. The reason is because a lot of Bible verses seem to indicate hell, but others indicate the eventual redemption and salvation of absolutely everything in the universe, so you have Christian universalism tracing itself back just as long. But, setting aside universalism, people who do believe in hell tend to fall into one of two camps:

Physical hell, aka suffering for eternity, or annihilation: the idea that souls that aren't saved end up annihilated, or snuffed from existence. HH combines both of them, wherein everyone lives in hell but then every so often heaven "exterminates" a certain number of sinners.

And then you also have Catholic purgatory, which is also adapted in HH in that... for most Christians, physical hell doesn't offer the ability to redeem yourself. Chance over, you're dead. But, Catholic Christianity, which draws on ideas of praying for the dead, has the idea that people can improve themselves or be prayed out of it and into heaven. This seems to be somewhat similar to the idea of Charlie's hotel, in that sinners can improve, redeem themselves, and rise to heaven.

And, I mean, it's already kinda worked. Sir Pentious acted out Jesus' words: Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down his life for his friends (John 15:13).

But anyways, the branch of theology that deals with the afterlife is eschatology. And Hazbin Hotel takes on a related form of theology as well, a type of theology I've only seen covered in stories once before (The House in Fata Morgana): atonement theory.

Atonement theory is something I remember well from my theology 101 class, as in I remember sitting with a friend and her turning to me and being like, "okay, so we know Jesus' death and resurrection give us eternal life, but we have no idea how or why?" To which the answer was "basically, yeah."

Most of the white, American evangelical church is very "penal substitutionary atonement," but the reality is that this theory has only been popular for the past few hundred years. It's also, imo, somewhat scripturally unsound. But there are a lot of other theories, and sometimes the theories overlap. Here's a fairly decent summary. (I'm in general a believer in Christus Victor.)

So how does atonement theory tie into Hazbin Hotel? Well, essentially the scene where Charlie and Vaggie are debating with Emily, Sera, Adam, Lute, and others in heaven is them going over various atonement theories and realizing that they actually know nothing at all. How does one get to heaven? How is one saved? They don't know.

Sera criticizing Emily for asking questions was also very relatable, and I feel for Sera. She's genuinely scared but the truth will set you free, Sera. John 8:32. Anyways, the point is like... the angels are an organized religion, an evangelical church, that preaches about simplicity but mistakes shallowness for simplicity and discourages depth and discovery.

Anyways, the whole crux of theological study and atonement theories is that they should promote humility. We don't know for certain on this side of the curtain. That's okay. So what do we have to guide us?

Love. After all, God is love (1 John 4:8).

Charlie is Jesus

"Why would you endanger your immortal life for these sinners?" 

Adam, the absolute worst, says the above to Charlie in the finale.

I mean... look. That's literally the premise of Christianity. That the immortal son of God comes down to earth, lives with sinners, loves us, and dies to save us. However that happens. Charlie even responds:

"They're my family!"

In other words, she loves them. Yeah, sure, they're destined for extermination, but they are going to be exterminated over her dead body.

In a lot of branches of Christianity, and even in some creeds--though I'm going to give into my pet peeves here and state that it is NOT Scriptural and relies on the faulty assumption that God is bound by time, when I think God exists outside of it--state that Jesus descended into hell after his death and took all the souls of people who were saved prior to his coming to earth to heaven. Again, I think that's small-minded at best. But, the idea that Charlie is working among them to bring them to heaven is pretty reminiscent of this idea. And I don't hate it lol.

Charlie sees worth inherent in everyone, and no matter what they've done, thinks there's a future for them. Honestly we need people like her on this earth.

Angel Dust

Angel Dust is clearly my favorite character. Bite back your shock, I know (I have a type). But his name is also a fascinating multi-layered pun.

Angel is clearly foreshadowing his endgame. Let's be real, we all know Angel is ending up as an angel. And "angeldust" is of course a name for PCP, and considering Angel's drug habits, yeah.

But, dust also has another meaning to it. See, when Adam was created in Genesis 2:7, the words in Hebrew are "apar min ha'adamah," which is translated literally as "dust of the ground." So the dust is what creates Adam, literally "ground."

In other words, I very much expect Angel Dust to end up being foiled with Adam even more so. Adam might be the first man, but Angel is the first sinner working towards redemption. And let's be real, for all Angel's flaws, he's already a better person than Adam. And if there's any hope for Adam (not that I particularly care if there is but) it'd be through realizing that he and Angel aren't actually different after all. Conversely (and not necessarily mutually exclusively), Angel might serve as a more symbolic "adam" in that he becomes the person all sinners look to for hope. Which, y'know, since "the last Adam" is also a Scriptural term for Jesus...

And so it is written, “The first man Adam became a living being.” The last Adam became a life-giving spirit. (1 Corinthians 15:45).

I fully expect Angel's arc, alongside Charlie's, to bring life and redemption for everyone around them. Maybe, maybe even the dramatic "all" of Colossians 1:20 (which means, literally, all, everything, everywhere, in the entire universe).

Closing Thoughts

But honestly, regardless of how the story ends--besides that it will presumably end happily because HH is at its core feel-good despite being profane--season one at least has got good theology. Why? Because it's digging into the questions that theology is concerned with. It's digging into the ideas of human nature, of what it means to be a good person, of what it means to redeem oneself, of affirming how precious each individual human soul is.

It doesn't offer cheap answers, and it specifically calls out the white American evangelical church for how it purports to be simple but actually just confuses people and punishes them for things they can't help, that creates more stumbling blocks than it does shine a light. And it does it in a way that is scandalous. Offensive to many religious people.

But, y'know, Jesus was pretty scandalous too.

So I really love the story so far because it emphasizes what I find so beautiful about my religion, and criticizes the parts that have also hurt me. I don't think it's remotely aiming to be a Christian allegory or anything like that, and I don't at all think anyone has to be religious to enjoy it or gain the core message of it, but I do think that it's doing a hell of a lot more good in the world message-wise than most evangelical movies of the past 30 years.

[beejunos]

SINNERMAN | Alastor x f.reader | part 1.

Summary: After Sir Pentious's failed attempt at spying on the hotel, the Vees approach you to make a new deal—a deal that you can't refuse. Help them take down Alastor, and you will get to kill him again.

After all, the great butcher of New Orleans had killed your brother, so it was only fair that you had killed him in return. And you would love to do it again.

Tags: Alastor x f!reader, slow burn, obsessive behaviour, enemies to lovers, spying, murder

PART 1. | AO3 | PART 2.

Chapter 1. The Deal

The road to hell is paved with good intentions.

Hell was not just a place where souls who had done horrific things with pleasure went, but also with people who had done appalling things out of necessity. Murderers, thieves, abusers and, growing more in numbers every year, politicians - hell was not a place for the weak-minded, but sometimes a human could be pushed into such acts, not because they themselves were more inclined to such behaviour, but because circumstance could turn anyone into a bloodthirsty killer.

You were one of those people.

Condemned to Hell for an eternity for a crime that you still believed to be justifiable. After all, the great butcher of New Orleans killed your brother, so it was only fair that you killed him in return.

"I told you it was a bad idea to pick that idiot to spy on the hotel. Did you honestly think it would work?" said Velvet without looking up from her phone. She was typing something with rapid-fire as she blew a bubble with her pink gum. It made a big popping sound that seemed to echo in the living room, making Vox clench his fist so as not to destroy the desk again. They had just replaced the last desk after he had dug his claws into it and left deep and long marks in the wood, and he did not feel like getting yelled at again for ruining the decor.

Vox counted to ten slowly backwards before he turned around from the monitors to look at the short woman. She was sitting curled up on the sofa before him, dressed in luxurious loungewear with hearts all over it. Valentino was sitting stretched out right beside her, his arm casually on the backrest. He was on his phone as well and did not look up when Vox came closer, but Vox could see that he was also irritated by Velvet's comment from the slight twitching of his right eye.

"Well, Velvet, my dear," Vox said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “I don't remember you having a better idea, but please, if you do, share it with the group."

Vox stopped walking as he reached the sofa, hands behind his back, and leaned down in front of the female sinner to force her to look at him. He had never been good with others ignoring him, and Velvet was taking her sweet time finishing her text before she even looked up from her phone. When she met his eyes, electricity was firing between his antennas, filling the air with static noise.

She just sighed before she picked up her phone again and started typing.

"You picked an idiot; that's why your plan didn't work. Little Miss Sunshine will believe anyone; just pick a smarter spy next time," said Velvet in her heavy British accent, popping another bubble with her gum. Vox's irritation grew with every word she uttered, and for a moment, he entertained the thought of grabbing her phone and throwing it out the window.

"And who do you suggest we'll ask?"

It took Velvet a few more seconds of searching before she found a decent photo, and then she turned her phone and showed Vox who she had in mind. The photo was old and blurry, with its subject in the distance, but it was still possible to distinguish who was in the picture. Vox turned his piercing gaze from Velvet down to her phone and quickly stepped back.

"You can't be serious!"

"Who?" said Valentino, now interested, as Vox started to pace the room. Velvet turned her phone towards the moth demon, and he reared back in alarm. "Are you out of your fucking mind? Do you even know how expensive she is?"

"So what? If you want the job done well, then pay a fucking professional," stated Velvet as if it was apparent.

"Professional? She runs a PR firm! Glorified party whores. Why the fuck should she be the spy?" cried Valentino, throwing his arms in the air. The gesture would have made anyone in his studio flinch, waiting for an impact, but Velvet sat rooted in her seat. She was used to the man's physical displays of anger by now but never feared them since he would never dare lay a hand on her. She lifted one of her eyebrows and continued with her argument:

"Didn't you see the fucking joke of an interview the princess did on the news? The hotel has a serious marketing problem. Everyone thinks it's a joke! What if the princess had someone to help her with the marketing and networking? Someone she would trust wholeheartedly, and that person worked secretly for us? It would be the best fucking spy! Not a guest but a staff member who could manipulate everything from the inside. We would know everything. A staff member would also be with the princess all the time and could keep an eye out for Alastor to make sure that no deal is made!"

Valentino groaned loudly before throwing his phone on the coffee table. He knew that Velvet's argument was good; he just did not like how expensive it would become if they went with it. There was a reason only the top of the elite of hell hired this PR firm, and it wasn't just for the public relations part. Rumours were travelling around the underground networks that you also dealt with some shady businesses, but who weren’t in this town?

"Can't we just kill them ourselves? I still want to shoot someone," mumbled Valentino, knowing none of his partners would accept the idea.

"And what? Piss of Lucifer for attacking his daughter? We could just piss on our own graves instead! If we pay her, we know she will get the job done; after all, you've heard the rumours, right?"

"What rumours?" snarled Valentino, sinking deeper into the sofa. His night was now officially ruined.

"No one hates Alastor more than she does."

"Well, that's not new! Half the city hates the old-timey prick." Vox, who had been pacing back and forth deep in his thoughts, abruptly stopped and turned around to look at Velvet. He also highly doubted anyone could hate the radio demon more than he did, but that was beside the point.

"So, let's use that to our advantage," said Velvet, growing more frustrated by the minute, "She is bound to at least be interested in the job if we can convince her to take down Alastor with us."

It wasn't a dumb idea, which annoyed Vox the most. However, his desire to take down Alastor outweighed any concerns for costs. He was prepared to cut his own leg off with a rusty saw if it meant he could take down the demon that plagued his very existence.

Vox sighed and crossed his arms in front of him, effectively giving up on arguing against Velvet.

"Okay, how do we contact her?"

On the opposite side of the entertainment district, where the Vees residence was located, was a small part of the pride ring where the older architecture still stood. The sinners who lived there were usually the ones who had stayed in hell the longest, many of whom had lived during the 18th and 19th centuries. There were fewer flashing lights and billboards in this part of town, but that did not mean that the sinners who lived there were anti-technology—for the most part.

That was why you liked living in this part of Pride, being from the early 20th century yourself. There were no loud noises, and during the night, you would, on more occasions than not, get a good night's sleep. Compared to the entertainment district, where no one seemed to sleep ever.

Your PR firm was located on the top floor of an old Gothic Revival building in the centre of this district. With its intricate stone details and towering spires, the building could feel almost cluttered and overwhelming on the outside. However, the rooms were spacious and elegant, with large stained-glass windows that cast colourful lights throughout the building.

You loved your office building and its moody exterior and interior. It made you feel like a character in one of the gothic novels that you had only learned to appreciate after your death. You could also argue that the whole thing had been influenced by the fact that when you had died and woken up in hell, your soul had taken the form of a bat. Reminding you of the book Dracula that your mother had loved so much, but that was irrelevant.

Walking around dusty old stone buildings, surrounding yourself with heavy wooden furniture and thick dark fabrics worked much better with the wings, big pointy ears, claws, and razor-sharp teeth you had now.

You had tried in the beginning to surround yourself with things that reminded you of the time you had been alive, but as time ticked on and the years went by, you could not help but leave most of the 20s and 30s behind and welcome the new ages, and all their inventions and quirks, with somewhat open arms. Your youngest assistant, a young sinner named Claudine, who died at the age of 25 in 2015, talked a lot about how similar social media in hell was to when she was alive, but considering the things she liked to show you, social media was one of the inventions you did not have any interests in. Your people could handle it for you instead, and if the three overlords that had strolled into your office like they owned the building were running the biggest tech and social media company in pride, you would happily leave that responsibility to Claudine.

Vox, Velvet, and Valentino were indeed a sight to behold. A poor sight for you. Their fashion and colourful clothing clashed horribly with your moss-green couch.

It was always a satisfying experience to observe new customers arrive at your office. However, this time, you could not help but wish they would just leave.

You put down the silver tray you held, with all the teacups and the teapot, on your mahogany coffee table and sat in the armchair on the opposite side of the sofa. Slowly, you started to pour the tea from the pot into the small and thin teacups before handing the first to Velvet. 

"Suger?" you asked, opening the lid to the sugar bowl. 

"Yes, please," she said, putting two sugar cubes in her tea. The smaller sinner grabbed one of the tiny spoons before she started to stir her tea, making the spoon hit the side of the teacup. The clinking sound seemed to bounce around the room endlessly. She may not have the most refined manners, according to you, but you suspected that she was the one who had wanted to see you in the first place since she was the one who was behaving the best.

"I must say, I was quite surprised when my assistant said that the Vees were waiting in my office." You took one sip of your tea that had one sugar cube and a dash of milk in it. "It is not often that I get these types of unplanned visits unless someone is in dire need of their reputation being saved, and last time I checked, you three had your own PR team." 

"We are here because we are interested in your more niche skill sets." 

Now, that was far more interesting. You had a sense that the Vees were not here for what your company offered on the outside but more for what you could provide that was strictly off the records. 

You looked over at Vox, who had spoken. Waiting for him to continue. 

It did not take the sinner long to tell you their plan and why they had decided to contact you specifically. Hell was filled with sinners and demons who said they specialised in espionage or assassinations, and although they could get the job done, more often than not, these "professionals" would leave long traces of evidence behind, which didn't matter in the end since hell did not have any justice system to speak of, but if you wanted to be undetected, it wasn't the best solution. However, you took your job seriously and worked with the utmost discretion, which led to you now holding almost the same amount of power as any overlord in pride. The big difference between you and the other overlords was that your capabilities were mostly unknown, and that's how you wanted it. It made it easier for you to work in the shadows. To hunt and kill without anyone knowing they were being hunted.

Only two overlords, Carmilla Carmine and Zestial, knew of your strengths and often hired you to deal with others they did not have time for or wanted to make time for. Yet, if the Vees knew about this side of your work, that meant the information about your skill sets was being spread around a bit more frequently than you wanted it. But that didn't worry you too much since you could always have Claudine and Earl fix it in just a few days.

"That is not a small task you have asked of me. To take down another demon is one thing, but to take down an overlord? Who also works for the princess? Now, why would I ever do that?" 

"We're not asking you to take down the princess. Only Alastor," said Velvet, putting a hand on Vox's arm. The man had started leaning forward unconsciously, his fists closing up with every second. 

Alastor. There was no man on earth or in hell that you hated more, and you would gladly watch him bleed to death, forgotten and alone in the forest again. After all, he had killed your brother, so it was only fair that you had killed him in return. But things had changed. He now possessed a form of power that you had never seen in another sinner in all your years in hell, and it made you pause. You knew that as soon as he found out what you had done, he would avenge his death, and you were not sure that you would survive that. So you stayed in the shadows, bidding your time. 

"Either way, we are not asking you to take him down alone. We want you to ensure no deal is struck between that radio freak and the princess. Find his weaknesses and help us take him down." Vox had the sort of manic look about him that you only saw in souls who were consumed by their obsessions, making him unreliable and reckless. But a deal like this did not come to you often, the type of deal that made you believe that you could kill Alastor again, and you never looked a gift horse in the mouth.

"Very well, I will help you, but it will cost you. Five hundred souls."

"Dea-"

You did not let Vox finish before saying, "Each."

"Each? Bitch, are you out of your mind?" roared Valentino, who had been quiet up till now. Even if the other Vees did not start shouting like the moth daemon, they were equally shocked and angered by your demand.

"My prices have always been high. Take it or leave it." You looked over at Vox, staring him down. You knew he would be the first to crack and agree to your demands. Velvet may have been the driving force that had led the Vees to your office, but she was still too rational and would start to bargain with you. Vox would sooner or later let his obsession win, making him agree to your deal.

"Do we have a deal?" You reached out your hand to Vox, trying to corner him and push him into a contract with you.

Before Velvet or Valentino had the chance to stop him, Vox shot forward and took your hand, and as he uttered the words that would sign their contract, an eerie green light filled the room. Cracks travelled up the walls all around you as the howling of hunting dogs travelled with the wind that started to blow in the office. Large shadows of the hunting dogs began to grow on the walls, their red eyes fixing the Vees in their places and right as the dogs would pause and devour the sinners on your sofa, the green light dissolved, and all that was left was the four of you in your office.

"Always a pleasure doing business with new customers," you chuckled, letting your sinister smile dance on your lips.

[chaifootsteps]

Sorry this is gonna be long. Vivziepop doesn't understand the gravity of sin and hence cannot comprehend the idea of redemption.

It's so obvious Viv has had some bad experiences with the Christian church, but she is also totally unwilling to research the philosophy behind the religion. There are reasons we believe what we believe, and reasons why what we believe gets twisted and used to hurt people, and even reasons why our beliefs in their truest and purest form can STILL hurt people. But regardless of their effects, whether good or bad, there are REASONS those beliefs exist, reasons backed up by literal millennial of theology and historical/academic study.

The idea that her characters don't even understand HOW someone gets into heaven just proves she gave no thought to the other side of the argument. The premise of Hazbin Hotel is that people can change and deserve a chance to be redeemed, but she fails to illustrate any actual change or redemption.

Redemption is predicated on the recognition of what you've done wrong and the desire to do better. It is an internal battle of constant self-examination and dedication to improve. The people that make up her main cast are sinful. Whether or not their sins mean they deserved hell is up to interpretation. I'm not asking her to follow the Catechism of the Catholic church. But if these people are to be redeemed, they have to acknowledge themselves as full of fault.

Husk was a gambler. A gambling addiction is not a fun or quirky hobby. It, like any addiction, is a complete loss of control and subservience to a vice that destroys your life and relationships with other people. Alastor was a cannibal and serial killer, who took the lives of fellow humans and desecrated their remains for his own pleasures, showing a complete lack of respect for the sanctity of life. Angel Dust hurts himself over and over and over again through his addiction to pleasure and narcotics. Sometimes sin doesn't hurt other people as much as it hurts us, but it's still a sin because we are supposed to treat our bodies as temples. These are all massive flaws of the characters, sins that have overtaken their personalities and lives, and yes, they may be interesting and fun and entertaining, but that doesn't change the fact they did bad things.

Vivziepop can't redeem anyone, because she fails to set a standard of righteousness. Sin is just a mutation of virtue. It's taking prudence and turning it into greed. It's taking humility and turning it into self-flagellation. It's taking love and turning it into lust. Because of her, I'm sure, completely valid religious trauma, she fails to recognize the humanity of the people that hurt her. That they too are just people who struggle with their own sin and vice. She can't comprehend or give the benefit of the doubt that religious people have valid explanations for their beliefs.

She seems to think of heaven as just a place of stuck-up hypocrites who don't know how to have fun. She seems to think the rules and regulations of religion are just arbitrary rules someone made up for a power grab and not a detailed and dedicated attempt of humanity to understand God and his desires.

Viv's understanding of redemption is likeability. It's illustrated in Angel's scenes in episode six. Yes, Angel is being nice and kind and caring about people, but his problems were never a lack of caring about people. His problems were using substances to deal with his problems, and yes he did deny the drugs Cherry offered him, but there was no moment of reflection as to why he no longer wanted to take them. It seems more like he wants to make Husk happy with him than he actually wants to form better coping mechanisms or even a recognition that he doesn't need the drugs to numb the pain anymore now that he has a support system.

She seems to think that if a sinner is likeable, they don't deserve eternal damnation. That's why she woobifies every character she grows to like, because being a good person and sin cannot co-exist in her mind. People who are likeable cannot be bad people and thus a system that would put a likeable person in hell is rigged and stupid. But that fails to comprehend the multi-faceted of humanity and sin.

Sometimes people you love, people who are good to you, are bad people to others. Child molesters can be good friends. Rapisits can advocate for animal rights. Murderers can be good parents. A person who abused you could be someone else's best friend, and a genuinely good friend at that. A failure to recognize the complexity of virtue and vice is a failure to understand what redemption means.

She can critique the idea of perfection. She can critique the hypocrisies of the church. She can critique the tenets of religion. She can even say the things I believe in are unfair and nonsensical and evil. But she cannot make a good critique without understanding the other side of the argument. Because without that, she herself has no counter argument!

The plot of Hazbin is no longer that people can be redeemed, but that redemption is not necessary, because the rules that government heaven and hell make no sense. And that's a COMPLETELY different argument to be making.

I apologize for the length. I hope I've made some semblance of sense.

No, no apologies for the length. It was an interesting read!

Some would argue that all religions are nothing but arbitrary rules someone made up for a power grab, but it's true, there's at least supposed to be some kind of rhyme and reason to it all. In theory at least, it's supposed to improve yours and everyone else's quality of life, but that goes against Viv's theory that the only thing that matters is doing whatever you want all the time. Viv doesn't have to side with Heaven or go full blown scripture, but you can't tell me that Heaven doesn't even know what it takes for someone to get in.

Thanks for your thoughts!

[dotster001]

Hi lovely! May I ask for the twisted wonderland dorm leaders reaction to piercings. (Nipples, septum, lip, industrial, bridge etc))

A/N: I wasn't sure if you meant on reader or them....so I did all of the above! Hopefully I hit what you were looking for 😂

3k masterlist

CW: religious fear in Riddle's part, but it's an if you know you know kind of thing 😂 😭

 In general, Riddle will always start out as anti piercing. His mother raised him that piercings are from the devil (or the devil equivalent in twst) and should be ever pierce his body with a needle, he would be thrown in the fiery flames for all eternity. So…he's anti piercing

That said, if he had to pick one he wanted, he'd go for a navel piercing. That way, the gods (and his mother) would never know he had it. He'd probably go for a simple ruby.

He doesn't react too much to piercings on other people. He just never thinks about it, even though he's always thinking about it for himself. So your piercings wouldn't phase him.

He's simplistic. A favorite piercing he'd have for you, is a simple nose stud. Maybe a ruby to match his hypothetical navel stud.

I'm totally blanking on what he looks like, but if he doesn't have piercings now, he will as soon as he's out of the public eye. Once Cheka is of age, he knows no one will care about the "delinquent second born" and he's free to do what he wants without judgment.

He'd go for a single stud on one side, a nose ring, a navel ring, and probably one lip piercing so that it glitters when he smirks.

He doesn't care if you have piercings. Obviously, it's sexy as hell if you do, but whatever, it's your life.

His favorite on you is, surprisingly, a basic earring. He likes to gently pull them with his teeth when he's feeling particularly flirty or needy.

He won't have piercings ever. It would affect his businessman facade. That said….if he ever got a piercing, he would want a single dangle earring so he can match the twins. Maybe a conch shell?

Another one who doesn't mind it on you. And his favorite one you? Tongue piercing. Not that he'll ever admit it…because it's his favorite due to him liking the feel against his tongue when your tongue is down his throat…the taste of iron filling his senses along with your signature smell….ahem. He uh he means he likes a typical earring on you. yup yup.

Pierced everywhere. He likes shiny things. There was no stopping him.

He would like you pierced top to bottom, so that he can shower you in even more gold and jewels. He loves to see you shimmer, and hear you jangle. Piercings just add to it. 

But if he had to choose a favorite spot, it's regular lobe and cartilage piercings on your ears. Then he can still see the shimmer 😁 he loves to decorate along your ears with chains and jewels, thinks it's so pretty

He has regular ear piercings. I'm sorry, a man who looks that hot in red heels is ready to wear a set of pearl drop earrings at a moments notice. He's modeled a hundred sexy looks in those hypothetical earrings, and you can't tell me otherwise. Maybe he takes them out for school so that when his fellow students decide to get in a fight, he doesn't have to hand them to Rook Everytime.

He wants you in pearl earrings to….just saying. He thinks you'll be so pretty, so professional, with a set of pearls; pearl choker, pearl bracelet, pearl earrings (does this feed into his desire to dress you like a doll? Maybe)

Out of everyone, he's the one who would get nipple piercings. Probably after watching some anime where the tough guy had gold nipple hoops. Subtle but enough of a character design that Idia snuck past Ortho to go get some himself.

He's gonna think any piercings you have are sexy. Nipple piercings? Bad ass. Navel? Show him that tummy. Lip piercing? Kiss him. I mean what?

Man wears black classy earrings. Doesn't really branch out, but that's fine. He looks hot.

He loves if you have piercings. It adds to his delusions about you, like "look at my rebellious little human". Mal Mal, it's just a nose ring? It's a common piercing in many cultures? Not a big deal? He's never gonna hear you over his delusions, babe

His fave on you? Navel and nipple. Because our Victorian man thinks seeing either is such a scandalous treat, and sends a thrill down his spine. Such intimate places, and he gets to see them! How thrilling! Humans are so brave these days!

[vroomvroomwee]

I don't think enough people realise how incredible Aziraphale is.

He's always known how good and kind Crowley is. Even from the beginning. Now imagine being in his place, after meeting such a wonderful and sweet angel, and hearing that he's fallen, that he's evil and wicked. No wonder he was sceptical and on edge at the garden... except Crowley was still the same, chatty, witty, and funny angel he met before the beginning. Crowleys fall terrifies him because in his mind, if someone like that can get sent to Hell, then what hope is there for me?

So he learns just how thin the line is between being an angel and a demon, just how close he's cutting it, just how little it takes for him to fall as well.

In his eyes, Crowley's brilliant. He's resourceful, intelligent, capable, everything he wants to be. Everything he's told he should be. And it creates so much confusion in his mind. How can someone like that fall while I'm still here? And it doesn't help one single bit that he's falling in love with him.

Aziraphale isn't stupid. Despite what everyone says, he's very in tune with his emotions. So much so that Crowley fails to keep up with his logic and decision-making. He realises that he's falling in love with Crowley, and that causes panick in him. He's an angel. He's not supposed to fall for temptation.

So he has two options: try to prove to himself Crowley's good and therefore justify his own feelings, or to prove Crowley's evil, and that's why he fell. So... in a way, he does both.

Every time Crowley tries to convince him of his malice, Aziraphale proves him wrong, sees right through him. All the while constantly putting a wedge between them, of good and evil. "But, you, are fallen." "I'm good, you, are evil." Even though he knows deep down that's not the truth, which is precisely why he's saying it, he knows Crowley is good, just as he knows he himself isn't fully. And no one must ever find that out.

Not only is he keeping Crowley at a distance for his own safety, but also for Crowleys. Sacrificing both their happiness for each others safety. He knows precisely what Hell will do to him if they ever find out how kind he really is.

And it would be very very simple if he just stopped hanging out with Crowley, except... he can't. No matter how hard he tries he's always pulled back to him. And over time he's testing his limits, what can I do? Am I allowed to do this? Food? That's forbidden? The Arangement? etc.

And you can't really blame him for fearing Falling. Not just burning in boiling sulfur as each of his cells is being transformed in the most agonising way, but also having to spend eternity there as well as the humiliation and resentment he'll get from Heaven. "My lot don't send rude notes." he knows how horrible and terrifying it is down there, and he is all too aware how he won't be able to cope. Too weak, too mellow, too soft.

Crowleys kindness is constantly putting him on edge because he just can't understand why he's a demon. While angels like Gabriel and Michael, who always put him down, are apathetic towards humanity, are narcissistic and emotionless... are still up there. 6000 years he's spent wondering when his time will come. When he'll be pulled down to Hell.

He's so goddamn kind that it took him 6000 years to realise Heaven is not all that it should be. Kinder than Heaven could ever hope to be (and after the "stay back" from ep6 we can see how thay he is capable of being harsh and ruthless, which means he actively chooses to be kind, which makes him all the more extraordinary and astonishing for it). And I'm not even going to go into the strength it takes to manage to break out of the brainwashing that Heaven has done to him. Thousands of years of being humiliated, feeling worthless, not good enough, not angelic enough, not even appreciated. And despite all that feedback and ridicule, he's never given in, never relented, never let anyone modify or change him, has never lost his kindness, his softness, his generosity even after all that he's seen and been through. And that is so fucking incredible.

Validation and praise being at his fingertips, if only he could let go of his individuality, his uniqueness. Of himself. Thousands of years of it, and he has never surrendered to it. Never betrayed himself, kept his pride and his self-worth despite other people trying to rid him of it.

And he knows this. He's too clever not to. He knows just how thin the ice is he's standing on. Even at the beginning, which is not long after the Fall if I might point out, he's defying orders and keeping Adam and Eve safe, risking his own safety for the safety of others. And he still doesn't back down.

But he can't for the life of him keep away from Crowley. Because of how much love he has for him, how much affection. "He's risking his entire existence," and he'll do it again because that's who he is. (Not many people will put their lives on the line for the person that tried to annihilate them, completely destroy them in every plane of existence. Actually, no one ever will. Except him.)

He. Never. Backs. Down. Not from Armaggedon and not from the Second Coming.

It's not that he doesn't love Crowley enough, it's that he loves him too much. This is an angel so full of love that he's scattering himself, breaking himself, tearing himself apart, trying to give it to everyone. To Crowley, to humanity, to Earth. He's risking destruction for the things he loves. Both physically and emotionally. He would sacrifice his own happiness, his own future with Crowley just to save humanity. And he does it again and again and that is so fucking amazing, so fucking incredible that I don't believe such a selfless character exists in any other piece of media or television.

(Also, this is all mostly referring to his emotional strength, but let's not forget how he faced literal Satan and smote around 20 demons in just a matter of seconds.)

Edit: Just wanted to add what one of you pointed out in the comments.

Aziraphale realises that running away with Crowley isn't really a relaxing and peaceful life as Crowley thinks it is. Far away from humanity and it's pleasures that they both love and engage with, something that brought them close in the first place due to their shared love for it, and constantly on the run from Heaven and Hell. Aziraphale is doing this for Crowley, so that he can be happy, so that both of them can be together. Not only that but he offered Crowley his angel status back, since he thought that would make him happy again, since he hoped that he could one day see that same smile that Crowley had when they first met, that smile that he hasn't been able to bring back all these years.

Aziraphale is now in Heaven, the last place he wants to be, the place he barely escaped with his life from, a place that hates him, filled with angels that despise him and want to see him suffer or worse, and he's utterly and completely alone.

He's trying to save the entire universe alone.

Think about that for a little bit.

Edit 2: I think it's worth noting that Aziraphale isn't perfect. And that's the point. He doesn't need to be perfect. He's naive and gullible and sees the world in black and white. He still needs to learn, to grow, to deal with these things. Soon enough, he'll realise that despite all the hope he has that he could fix Heaven, it just can't be mended, something Crowley has learned a long time ago and desperately tries to shoe him. He'll realise the system is corrupt, and no matter how hard he tries, it won't change because it wasn't designed that way. And it just makes him all the more brilliant. He isn't perfect. He has flaws, and he makes mistakes. He's an angel, but he's the most human of them all. And he's incredible all the more for it.

[ms3ox]

w i f & e

In which, Alastor has his ego beaten into the ground, and still can't find a good reason to hate you.

Part I/???

Tags: Slow Burn, Really Petty Enemies to Lovers, Unintentional Marriage (soon)

Notes: I have a good ~40 pages of this already written. Lmk if you guys want more.

______________________________________________________________

At one point in time, Alastor could definitively say that he didn’t care what happened to his wife. 

You were… auxiliary at best and a nuisance at worst. A mess of naivety, youth, and a bumbling sense of goodness. Its truly a marvel how someone so seemingly innocent made her way down to the Pride Ring. But perhaps that was it. Pride. At least, that was his working hypothesis. He couldn’t say for certain what landed you eternal damnation, and perhaps it was none of his business anyway what with the way you kept it strictly under wraps. In another life, perhaps, Alastor would be curious, but time is wasted on flights of folly such as deducing the nature of his benefactor’s death. You had spiraling horns etched into your skull, so you were, in one way or another, just like the rest of them. 

It isn’t until he feels that tug that he realizes what he feels is nothing short of care. The phantom tugs at his chest, at his heart, a pitiful plea for help, but one that smells so familiarly sweet that he knows who it is and where its coming from.

And despite the way this growing humanity makes his fingers strain and curl, he dissolves into shadow and slithers toward your pull. 

---

Boredom is the worst part of Hell. 

Killing and eating can only be so much fun. After disposing of his… hmm, how many now? After disposing of his thousandth body, he finds that the appetite following the kill is nigh on nonexistent. He’s just… restless and bored. There are no turf wars around, no drama within the collective of Overlords, Hell, even Vox has been a doldrum of content lately- a stream of useless garbage that seems even more mind-numbing than the demon’s usual flare for juicy gossip and electric presentation. 

Deal-making is the same as it always has been, too. Alastor finds himself putting in all the work, all the fanciful and dandyish flare to impress his prey before ripping their autonomy right out of them with a handshake. And they’re all the same. Scared, hopeless, down on their luck. Reluctantly trustful of a smile before regretting it for eternity. When one owns thousands of souls… none of it feels… fulfilling anymore. The blood-red skies of Hell seem to fade to a miserable, dried brown- the same sky he’s been staring up at for the past century. 

God, he is so bored. 

This is the real torture. The real damnation. 

Rosie must see the apathy in his eyes and dullness in his smile because her face quickly contorts into something concerned the moment he enters her emporium.

“Alastor?” She would whisper with that soft concern the ladies in his life harbor for him. Even that has become dull to him. “You look all outta sorts, mister. What’s goin’ on, hah?”

And just like many of the concerned ladies in his life, Rosie is quick to offer a solution. He sits with his fingers steepled and his gaze far, far away as Rosie explains another deal opportunity to him. For once, Alastor doesn’t feel like being theatrical. Boredom has sucked the life out of this radio broadcast. Newcomer… Naive… Struggling in Hell, yada yada. 

“...I’ll consider it.” Is Alastor’s simple and placating reply. 

—

The first thing Alastor notices is that you know your way around a knife. Not necessarily how to fight, but you seem to have a keen eye for all the mortal points on a demon’s body- and when executed correctly…

“Impressive, my dear!”

The dandyish facade and wide smile return again like muscle memory- perhaps that’s what it is after decades of tricking demons into eternal bondage. Your eyes narrow suspiciously as the tall, creepy man in the red coat takes measured, clacking steps toward you. Soon enough, Alastor finds himself on the sharper end of your bloodied little pocket knife. Come to think of it, Rosie had said something about the demon being somewhat adept with a weapon… He’s sure there’s more information that his boredom has glossed over and tucked into his memory, never to be found.

“Alastor,” He says without so much as a flinch, taking the other end of the knife and shaking it as if it were your hand. “Pleasure to be meeting you, quite a pleasure.”

He pays no mind to the way his blood seeps around it. He’ll visit the tailor for new gloves later. And… perhaps a dry cleaning, what with the violent spray of demon blood that the little demoness incurred with your paltry knife skills and scarily surgical precision. But you seem to pick up on the fact that no amount of ferality and intent to kill can bridge the sloping gap in power between you. Your eyes narrow.

“Do you want something?”

Alastor hums, tapping a finger to his chin. His polished shoes clack with every circling step he takes around you, you and your tattered rags you call clothes.

“Want is a strong word, my dear.” He taps your head with his microphone, then points to the disgustingly garish Embassy as another day drops from its count. “Our annual cull is coming soon. You won’t want to be a street urchin when God’s little pests arrive.”

The mention of God seems to set you off in some way. Your shoulders square, your eyes widen, and there’s some kind of hunger in your black irises that catches him off-guard for a moment.

Interesting…

“I believe it would be in your best interests to seek protection… Shelter…” He circles you once more before arriving at your front. Alastor extends his hand, bending down to meet the sprightly thing eye to eye. Your scleras are pure, white… untainted. Something he hopes to rectify.

“Let’s make a deal.”

A blade narrowly misses the underside of his rib, and he only realizes that when he sees one of his blackened, eldtrich tendrils squeezing at your wrist, keeping it firmly steady while it hovers just before his coat. Alastor clicks his tongue, straightening his posture. He could kill you…  but that feels like a waste of resources.

“Calm yourself, dear, I haven’t even outlined the terms!”

The girl’s eyes narrow even more, if possible, your thin brows furrowing in a way that casts angry shadows over your features. This was going to be a hard sell. But… Alastor’s been known to play with words. His hand finds your straining wrist, replacing the hardness of his power with a gentle touch.

“Pledge yourself to me and I-.”

“No.”

Alastor can’t help the sharp feedback his microphone makes at your sudden dismissal. You will just not let him get a word in edgewise, hm? His jaw hangs open in shock before he quickly rectifies himself, smoothing down his suit. Okay. He can work with no. He’s walked this path many times before. They always come crawling back, one way or another. 

“Hm. I hope you keep this conversation in mind then.”

He hums a jaunty tune as he leaves the stubborn girl to the shadows.

---

[onehundredandeleventropicalfish]

Dream has a nasty habit of giving advice and not taking it himself:

He tells Orpheus to grieve for Euridice(I'm not sure if I spelled that right) and then get over the loss, but he never got over Orpheus' death;

He tells Hob that taking away someone's free will is dishonorable. Yet he imprisons Nada and unmakes Gault for defying him;

He warns the fox lady against revenge but he wastes his precious energy on trapping Alex's mind in a nightmare after he gets freed.

He's such a bastard and I love him

He loves and cares so deeply for everyone, yet he's petty and spiteful. He never stops loving yet he can be so cruel to those he cares about

I don't remember where but I read this somewhere about Dream: "he can love without forgiveness and forgive without love" and I think that sums up Dream pretty nicely. He's full of contradictions and that's what makes me love him as a character so much

you know, ironically, while it's absolutely true that dream can be hypocritical, you're definitely not wrong, those first two actually aren't, as far as he sees the world

because the thing that hurts dream the most is that he cannot see himself as a living being - he is endless, he has a purpose, that's the extent of his existence

and therefore he doesn't dream, doesn't have a story, shouldn't want things for himself

and this is why he causes his own tragedy, because he is a person and he does need the things that make up someone's life, but he refuses to believe so

so when he's talking to orpheus, the important part here is "you are mortal, it is the mortal way"

dream would benefit greatly from being allowed to mourn orpheus, but he can't, he has a job to do, and allowing himself to grieve would interfere with his purpose. so he has no choice, he has to bury it

"so live" only applies to orpheus, as far as dream's concerned, because he doesn't think the endless live

gault falls under the exact same logic. dream sees his creations as extensions of him and is always surprised when they go beyond that. and if he's not allowed a life of his own, if he has to spend eternity fulfilling his purpose as it was given to him, they do too. they're not mortal, they don't live, and thus they don't have free will

(i'm honestly super curious to see what happens in the show from here because gault didn't exist in the comics, and dream actually acknowledging she was right is a major step forward that comic dream never managed to make)

and nada had free will

she just didn't think she did

that's how hell (or any afterlife) works, in the sandman universe, there is no being that judges it. death doesn't decide where you go, and neither does anyone else. you go where you believe you should

which is what makes sure people get to the right afterlife for their particular religion, but also it means that everyone in hell believes they deserve to be there

dream may have put her there, but he didn't have the power to keep her there. when she says "only your forgiveness can free me", that doesn't mean dream has to formally pardon her, it means she can only leave when she stops feeling like she was in the wrong here. and a part of her hates him for this, but a part of her is also stuck feeling guilty, and that's what's keeping her in hell. it's still a shitty move on dream's part, don't get me wrong, but when he said that to hob he was not currently doing anything to prevent her free will. had she truly decided what dream did was unfair, she could have left

revenge, however, that's where you're absolutely right. dream knows, on so many levels, that revenge causes more problems than it solves, and yet this is the one indulgence into human feelings he actually allows himself

he tells the fox not to, he tells hob revenge is a bad idea, he's constantly explaining to people he cares about not to take revenge because it will get them hurt. he is the prince of stories, and he knows how revenge stories end

(destruction even says he was disappointed that dream is still viewing everyone as stories, he'd hoped one day dream would realise people are people)

dream, though. dream doesn't have a story, so who says his revenge has to end in tragedy? he pushes down all his emotions for the sake of the world but anger doesn't want to leave, anger is good at convincing you it deserves to stay, anger can be righteous

if everyone else is just a story, well, the end is that they get what's coming to them. they deserve to be punished for hurting the people dream cares about, and who better to ensure the end of the story than him?

(and he doesn't realise how much his own emotions are influencing those decisions. he thinks he's being rational. he's not. what you were saying about him being both loving and spiteful always makes me think of orpheus - he loved his son more than anything in the world, he was a genuinely good dad and he did everything in his power to keep orpheus from tragedy. but then when orpheus ignored him and got hurt anyway, dream couldn't help but be angry at orpheus for causing their entire family so much pain, and that's why he walked away)

all the endless have different ways in which they see themselves in comparison to mortal beings. the more emotionally healthy ones realise that there's very little difference between the two. and then you get desire who explicitly admitted (in internal narration) that their entire sanity is hinging on believing that they are in control of the universe, they physically can't believe dream when he says they serve humanity and not the other way around. and dream, who sees everything and everyone as a story, except himself

he's not a living being, he doesn't follow their rules. he's not playing the game, he's the referee

except that's not and never was true

and that is the root of all of dream's problems

[shoezuki]

Ok random things/hc bout the aha!sampo divinity AU i was thinkin of

Aha at some is like. Yknow what fuck it im gonna reincarnate as a human n see whats up w this. So he basically takes bits and pieces, dropped change n spilled drinks on the floors of taverns, scrapes the side of the universe, takes scripts and stories and anything made from human joy n makes a body out of it

He starts off as a kid cuz he saw kids n were like o those guys seem to have fun hell ya.

He makes sampo koski and Becomes Him. Is taken in by the masked fools cuz they are all a lil fucked up so spendin too much time w em or struggling to hide his divinity can scramble their brains only so much...... probably.

Also these ppl who worship him not realizing the scrawny kid they took in is aha????? Thats funny as shit

Sampo grows up normally. Well he kinda got it a bit wrong n he grows at a wayyy slower pace than humans but he jus says he got caught in a temporal anomaly or smthing.

It takes him a long time to really get a hold on his powers/presence/divinity and ends up making people go mad quite often. Sometimes on purpose.

The masked fools send him to planets, give him scripts and have him portray characters and sow chaos. He bends reality a bit sometimes to make the scripts more fun. He creates a major presence on the masked fools and becomes infamous in some planets n ships thay marginally survived him

(Some of the things he does cant be attributed to him and it puzzles people. Theres no way a mere human could change the colours of stars or rearrange galaxies n move planets a lil to the left, right? He makes entire waterbodies taste like beer and makes trees bleed when cut and flips mountains upside down)

The role he's given in Jarilo is his longest one yet. Usually he's just like a force of nature running through but this time he becomes a Person on this planet

He meets the underworld ppl and they all have different reactions to his divinity the longer he's around them:

Natasha is fairly sensitive to his power but it doesnt really overwhelm her. She hears childrens laughter when hes around and the air feels warm like sunlight that Belobog hasnt experienced since the eternal freeze and every time he brings her medicine or carries out of her requests she tastes bubblegum on her tongue. She never says anything but sometimes she Stares n it makes sampo squirm

Oleg tenses every time sampo shows up but eventually forces himself to relax. But he always has to be aware of sampo at all times, can't ever turn his back to sampo or be unarmed around him. He has no clue why and thinks theres something wrong with him and its his problem not sampos. But sometimes when he looks at sampo he can almost swear he sees something shift over his skin

Seele doesnt notice anything for a long time. She has to be around sampo for hours sometimes days without break. But eventually she just becomes irrationally angry with him. Everything sampo does grates on her brain and makes her want to attack him. She doesnt think anything of it and just assumes its because sampo is annoying.

Luka is one of the least sensitive to divinity. Any anxiety or unease he feels around sampo he just attributes to sampo being a shady guy. Sometimes sampo's laughter and his voice feels heavy in his skull though

Children in general are highly sensitive and resilient to the divine: sampo doesnt know why. Maybe because theyre brains are still developing? Because they arent stuck in their own ideas of reality n rationality like adults? Regardless Hook KNOWS sampo isnt normal. She doesnt question it, she just knows sampo makes things fun.

He finds a lot of responses with those in the underworld: some want to worship him, others want him dead, some cant look at him without feeling sick. For some reason the overworlders tend to find him more unsettling and disconcerting. Qlipoth probably has nothing to do with it but Sampo blames qlipoth

[justineangelrococo]

Hazbin and Helluva boss theories spoiler talk as well.

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Alrighty before the new episodes come out I have a theory I want to put out

These three right here Lucifer, Lilith, and Eve are why hell is the way it is, I'm calling it now and I want to be wild with this theory for a moment. These three were in a poly relationship or situationship, or just friends, or Eve might have been like fuck you dude after her experiences with Adam, and was just friends with Lilith.

Now as we know when Lucifer fell and was sent to hell he got majorly depressed, he is not doing well its hard to say he is functional, as someone with depression he needs help but he gave up. Which is hard and something you can't do especially when you have a child, Eve could have pointed it out, maybe in Charlie and Lilith's best interest maybe not. But we're going to say they left together and raised Charlie together maybe with Eve maybe being her nanny, her tutor who knows but she was there, she has to be because she definitely isn't in heaven from what we have seen.

They could have been twinning it up if the theory is they look identical is correct but I don't know about that, Adam's face looks a screen monitor, and his exorcists follow that trend, which makes me think she's static, the static you see on the TV when you have no signal or looking for a channel and the antenna isn't in a ok position, and you know what this fits to me at least.

Let's look at Lilith in hazbin hotel, she is audible, music song, her voice, Soundwaves carrying empowering messages and songs.

Visual and Audible, almost like two other characters we see Alastor, and Vox. Alastor being audible with radio and his waves casting his shows out, and Vox with his shows, tech, all of the media that requires being seen. Vox is always trying to get at Alastor, what if their relationship is a mirror of Lilith and Eve's. Eve jealous or wanting to be close to Lilith, who knows maybe Eve is the one Alastor made a deal with and the reason he was so mad at Lucifer is because Eve might have been at Lilith's side and this man hasn't done a thing, after years of help raise his daughter now he shows up, like boy if you don't you'r behind out of here like go! Or maybe Alastor did make a deal with Lilith and after hanging out having sometime with the girls got the tea and about Lucifer seeing how he is a parent and was like no, and now has a beef with him.

Which leads us to our other thing why haven't we seen Eve, anything about her seems just hidden or lock and key, we never see anything but her smile, never her eyes which makes you think right, another bit into this ramble of a theory I got eyes are the windows to the soul, straight to the heart right does Eve even have one, like is she a good person, what kind of a person was she because the smile she wears might not be a kind one, she is the mother of Cain and Able and all the other humans, Adam is a asshole, but what is Eve.

Is Eve angry because maybe Lucifer and Lilith didn't take her with them, now she's stuck with Adam and being the eternal scapegoat for years for eating the fruit. Being the reason people put down women because they are her daughters, this could be a big revenge plan on heaven, for letting Adam when he doesn't deserve it into heaven. Lucifer and Lilith for giving her the fruit and ruining everything about humanity, for heaven for creating humanity and letting them suffer, to go through it all and end up in hell

Or the other sad theory is Lilith is Dead, more than likely do to Lucifer and, Eve is fucking pissed but you know what they continue the relationship and someone has the idea for her to pretend to be Lilith, maybe for Charlie's best interest for hell's best interest. Because Lucifer isn't running the show, someone has too mind you the show being run is awful but it's running and why do I say it's awful. Because when you look at helluva boss and the treatment of some hellborn demons they have their problems like when Blitz when to go take Loona for her shots and it took as long as it did for them to even be seen.

Which Lucifer doesn't care about, the other leaders of the rings and the other people in charge don't care the system works for them, Imps, hellhounds. But at the sametime it's supposed to be awful its hell, but at the sametime the people it's supposed to punish can't even leave the top layer, so why is awful in some of the other layers, mainly because the others are left to their own devices, when leading their rings, Mammon is a piece of shit, but Asmodeus isn't as bad of a guy as you would think, Beelzebub as we see her isn't either. Now my other reason why Lucifer doesn't care as much, they don't have his gift, humans have his gift of knowledge and have souls, the hellborn as we know don't have a soul, not sure gonna need to get more proof on this but this is a theory ramble.

The angels and heaven created hell to keep Lucifer in so he would be punished and never see the good results of his work they would be in heaven, out of reach. That doesn't mean he doesn't care about them a little bit he made sure that the hellborn, and his daughter would be spared from being killed by heaven.

But yeah this is my theory rant until the new episodes until they come out or the brain gets going again. I was filled with all thes jumbled thoughts sorry if it wasn't as well organized but I just wanted to get them out folks, hopefully other people also see me and go ayyyyy I had those theories too and remember this is all this is all for fun and just some theory and rambles.

[mushroomnoodles]

the lovers/vampire au hcdump part 2, with a focus on petrigrof (characters drawn in my style)

once again putting under a read more; these are notes ive put down while riding home from work on the bus. here's pt 1 btw.

On the subject of THE HANGED MAN

something simon thinks about often is the sheer stagnance of vampirekind. vampires are a species that stay the same forever- they don't evolve or change; hell, the vampire kingdom is old school, even to simon.

simon is physically weaker than an average vampire- he suspects this is due to the radiation poisoning he suffered from before being turned. it takes him longer to heal and he doesn't have possess vampire strength the others of his kind have.

simon doesnt really mind this- he merely observes this fact. his body stayed the same way it was the morning betty bit him; the same way it was after her bite mutated and changed his body for the last time. plus, simon is a man of habit.

a thousand years of life with betty has made simon more open with her; they talk, like, about how they feel, how their relationship feels.

simon has grown quite philosophical and his field of study has expanded. being undead gives him this subconscious duty to put his eternal life to good use: the library. an ode to scholars and thinkers, adventurers and collectors. an ode to the humanity he left behind.

he always says sorry to the few humans he's ever directly fed from.

simon has only fallen to blood frenzy once.

simon's library is quite frankly, huge. you can't reach the books on half the shelves without flight or telekinesis.

current research focus is on procuring the ice crown. (he would be immune to its effects as a vampire)

simon refuses assistants and servants because they make him feel weird, despite the fact THE LOVERS could absolutely have them in their chambers.

simon loves his side job as a professor btw. he always gets so cheery and dorky when it's that time of the year for him to get his students.. and he loves history!! he definitely goes on old man rants about "his day" every now and then

being pregnant with morrigan made him wonder if perhaps there WAS a cure for vampirism after all. he'd entertained the thought every now and then despite the fact that everything he looked into claimed it couldn't happen. but if his body could still remember how to function like a human's, then it didn't seem so impossible to him.

On the subject of THE WORLD

a great strategist- but she misses traveling the world, researching and hunting for ancient artifacts with simon. this is not her dream.

cooking food was a love language and hobby for her. sux when you and your hubby can't eat food.

loves making morrigan snacks (they're a living vampire and can eat food!)

betty's whole thing is.. improvise. adapt. overcome. she keeps working hard so she can keep winning hard.

her fangs are VERY long. they always jut out of her mouth despite her best efforts, and she has to hide her mouth when incognito.

that makes it kinda hard to kiss simon but she's had a thousand years of practice!

due to the length of her fangs, her feeding bites are always fatal.

she is considered very beautiful. simon agrees

spends a lot of time out and about. she is also the vampire king's current advisor, so she spends a lot of time by his side. it's probably a good thing, and a better thing he trusts her. but she worries. she isn't as ruthless with the subject of conquest as others would like. sure, vampires are powerful, but taking over everything.. would upset the balance of life. they'd exhaust their resources.

she can be pretty scary. betty has learned to project an intimidating persona to keep up her role as battle strategist and advisor. it helps keep others off her back, too.

betty is in part so successful because she is constantly improving upon herself and adapting, she challenges vampirekind to change. it's just so hard for them to do.

betty adapts well to new settings. she finds it.. reasonably easy to settle into new situations, especially when human spying is involved. she just needs a feel for her surroundings.

betty can be ruthless, sure, especially when simon is involved in the danger. but she remembers her roots. she would never cause harm to a human that was not a threat.

she partially trained marceline to fight before the vampire king took over her training.

she's stressed. simon is her escape. she always gets to their chambers, throws her expensive and intricate robes off.. and embraces simon.

dramatically lounges and climbs all over simon in her sleep. subconsciously heat seeking.

worries that if things come to it and they leave the kingdom, simon will be unhappy. he seems to really like it here.

sleeps naked 80% of the time

[hell-drabbles]

Leviathan 1

Summary: What sort of expression will Leviathan make, when he finds out that Solomon wishes to stay by you above all else?

(About time I finally got started on him. It's a thought experiment, where Eldritch Reader crafts a body for Solomon to use to interact with the devils.)

How does Leviathan act when around Solomon?

Dazed, air-headed, as though his head was filled with nothing but that pink cotton candy that Solomon once handed you to try. It was interesting to you, watching this devil go from an envious, haughty being to this being that was almost puppy like in nature.

A rather grumpy puppy, always gazing at Solomon for any hint of praise, or to just simply drink in his joy as he continued to talk.

"You can stay."

However, such a face, such a personality was simple. Stupidly simple. Simpler than any of the humans you've ever met.

Leviathan was filled with such longing that he must have Solomon stay, must 'give him permission,' to stay so that they can never be apart. He didn't pick up Solomon's reluctance to talk about anything beyond the general vague platitudes. Leviathan didn't even notice that all of Solomon's stories are of before his meeting with you.

Or, rather, Leviathan did listen, but sorrily thought that because Solomon is so secretive about the years he was missing, and the years he spent as one with you, that they simply didn't mean anything. That clearly, being here in Hell was more important than anything.

Solomon paused then shifted back. He glanced at you, ever an observer of his every waking moment, then smiled somberly.

"I won't." Not can't. Won't.

Human language in all their subtle social rules will forever fascinate you. A simple difference, all to express Solomon's will.

Such things, as you've learned and absorbed, completely miss Leviathan.

Leviathan has this face that keeps perfectly composed. It reminded you of pale marble, untouched by the reaches of time. It made that slight change, that furrowing of his eyebrows, look childish, like Leviathan didn't practice the expression enough.

"It would be easy work, to get rid of your captor, if that's what's keeping you-" Then Leviathan touched Solomon's wrist.

Captor, huh? Are you truly? Captor of knowledge, certainly. You had a phase where you wanted any and all knowledge to begin and end with you, where you made whole villages forget where they are, who they are, and what they are. Simply because their knowledge was interesting to you.

But a captor of humans? Of their physical selves? No, you never did such things. Still haven't.

And Solomon knows this well.

You smiled when Solomon got up from the table, pulling his arm away from Leviathan.

"… Those words, never say them to me again," Solomon gazed down at Leviathan, "I don't wish to hate you."

The finality in his tone had you reaching out your hand. Clearly Solomon has reached the ends of his patience, being away from you, from your essence for too long.

"Wait! Solomon!" Leviathan could very well close the distance and simply take Solomon away, but he won't. You know he won't, not when his heart still beats for everything that is Solomon.

Too bad, his heart beats for you and you only. Now and forever.

Solomon will forever be within your gaze, within your self.

He grasps your hand without hesitation and knelt down on one knee. A silly little ritual that Solomon doesn't need to do, but does nonetheless. How adorable. How human.

"You could never be my captor," Solomon murmured against your wrist, "You are my key of knowledge, the stellar gaze that lays within my heart. I will walk into the fabric of eternity that is you."

"And I will always hold you close to me, until we weave into one." And you had to entertain him. How could you not? His devotion is second to none.

He vanished into dust upon your palm. You are not a void, there is nothing in you to feel missing. But it felt like a warm blanket upon your shoulders, having Solomon within you once again. He holds onto you as much as you hold onto him.

You both won't let go.

"You…" Ah, it seems Leviathan has learned to express true indignation. His face was almost distorted with it.

You shook your head. "Did you expect any different? Leave those false hopes behind, lest Solomon learns to hate you."

[thequietkid-moonie]

Moonie, mind blowing idea now because this dumbass has insomnia and came up with another request:

Bichos escrotos - titãs

Brunhilde

Do as you will with this information

God!reader is complety supportive of her plan

[ ONE-SHOT ] [ Brunhilde ]

[ Shuumatsu no Valkyrie / Records of Ragnarok ]

› Song that inspired this [ Bichos Escrotos - Titãs ]

A really interesting song! I actually liked it!! I don't get much requests for Brunhilde, not complaining tho I don't even know if im good at writing her

Brunhilde hates the gods, she hates them to dead, there is no one who hates them more than her and yet she can't hate you

It wasn't always like that, the moment she met you she was just polite but doesn't thought much of you, however you insisted on wanting to know her, for some reason you find her really interesting and wanting to get closer to her. It was irritating and annoying as hell for her having you around, but as the time pass Brunhilde started to warm up a little, it was a really slow process but you manage to get closer to her

One of the things that brought the two together was the fact that both hate the gods, yes you were a god but that doesn't stop you from hating your kind, you just can't endure how disgusting egocentric beings they can be, thinking they all perfect and superior than humans when they can be actually worst (and she finds really hilarious your opinion)

It took a long time but at the end Brunhilde started to see you as a good friend, you being the only exception of her eternal hate for gods. She started to trust you so much that even she allowed you to see her true emotions and be there in her vulnerable moments (even when she isn't completely direct), she knows she can trust you with important things without even getting into much details because you know her

Once she started to make her plan to challenge the gods she gives you some hints but didn't say it completely clear for a while, she even asked you to please contact Buddha without telling you for what, however, knowing her the way you do know her it won't take you too long to find out what she was planning to you (and she doesn't mind much, she knows you won't try to sabotage her plan and if you are willing to help her is just a win for her)

Brunhilde asked you if you were really willing to help her because if you do there will be serious consequences for you, not matter if you win or lose, but you just tell her with a big smile that she shouldn't worry about such things, if you weren't sure of taking those risks you weren't even approached to her at the start in the first place and with that you two started to get ready together

You helped her with her investigation about humanity, your helped her choose the fighters and train Buddha's technique volundr, and just like that the time pass until the moment of the meeting of the Gods came

Once the moment of the meeting came you just take a sit like always and get comfy on your throne, patiently wating for your dear friend to came, you hold a little smile and keep your mouth shut for the entire discussion, just talking if someone asked you something and giving silly vague answers, not too strange for you, you didn't even bothered on thinking much on your vote when Zeus started the voting, just trying to ignore all the sound of the room to pay attention to be able heard the sound you wanted to heard

When the doors finally were open, revealing your friend with book in hand you can't help but smile widely, this is what you had been wating since the start of this stupid meeting, delighted with how the expression of all the gods change with irritance with every word leaves Brunhilde's lips

Once the meeting was over you just wanted to go to your friend to laugh about all of this situation, mocking the prideful gods, but you were stoped by Zeus, who was starting to get ready too for the tournament, kindly asking you to fight for the gods side on the Ragnarok, you were a pretty stronge and recognized god, with your unique habilities and strength it won't be difficult to win against those pathetic humans, you take a moment to look at him, pretending to think about it for a moment making Zeus start to feel irritated, before shrugling like if it wasn't nothing and saying no, you will fight for the humans, leaving Zeus get consumed by his own anger while you happily make your way towards your dear friend, wanting to tell her what just happened, and, also, laugh at the gods you hate so much

[n3ptoonz]

mk1 dialogues with the outworld girls!

warnings: flirtatious banter but that's about as far as it goes like in my earthrealm guys dialogues!

enjoy! <3

Sindel

you: no wonder your daughters are gorgeous.

sindel: that is the fourth time i've been told that this week.

sindel: you're strong...i admire that about you.

you: so take my hand in marriage, if you dare.

you: your banshee tendencies don't bother me, empress.

sindel: will you still be saying that when your ears ring for eternity?

sindel: my eyes are up here, dear.

you: i know, i just keep getting lost in them.

Kitana

kitana: liu kang says it's possible we were lovers in another timeline.

you: then let's make it another one.

you: forget raiden, i'm the real deal.

kitana: after seeing you fight, it wasn't even a question.

kitana: have you lost your mind?

you: all logic is out the window when it comes to you, princess

you: how early is too early to say "i love you"?

kitana: [chuckles] are all earthrealmers so...passionate about people they just met?

Mileena

mileena: what makes you sure you could handle an empress?

you: i'm not, but i'd surely be glad to show you

you: i saw you eyeing me at the tournament, empress

mileena: i was wondering whose sweet blood i was smelling!

mileena: do you think kitana secretly wishes to take the throne from me?

you: i've never seen anyone so genuinely in support of their own sibling, you're safe

you: with or without constant blood lust and attempted murder, you still got it, empress

mileena: is this your way of buttering me up? because it's working

Tanya

tanya: you'd be perfect for the umgadi

you: will i get a hot empress in return?

you: brown skin, pretty brown eyes-

tanya: finish that sentence and you'll be kebabed

tanya: i can't tell if you're trying to flirt with me

you: does "break up with your girlfriend i'm bored" work or?

you: hot person gets beat up by hot warrioress, what happens next is shocking

tanya: ...what are these foreign lack of formalities you spew towards me?

Ashrah

you: so? is there evil radiating off of me?

ashrah: surprisingly, not much even with that grin on your face

ashrah: you know bi han called me a "lizard fucker" the other day?

you: damn...was he wrong though?

you: you seem interested in my eyes, m'lady

ashrah: it's just that syzoth gives me those same eyes whenever we're alone

ashrah: you have a strange fascination with demons, mortal

you: it's like johnny said, why are all you guys so hot?!

Nitara

you: why the hell do you talk like that?

nitara: better to silence you with, human

nitara: you dare gaze upon a vampire's breasts before a fight?

you: ...sorry, could you repeat that?

you: for the record, you could have all the blood you want, gorgeous

nitara: it's not so fun when it's willing...

nitara: i don't think you understand, i could literally split you into thirds and feast on your body

you: loud and clear, should i play dead now or later?

Li Mei

li mei: you think you could take on an officer?

you: duh! ...oh you meant in a fight?

you: oh, just live a little!

li mei: hard to do when i don't even know what "throwing it in a circle" means

li mei: choose your next words wisely

you: uh..."looking for a new punching bag?"

you: i know you'd look even better with your hair down

li mei: more talk like that and you'll have to ask for my blessing next

[ashisgreedy]

Ruler of Hell - Garreth Weasley

Obsessed | Possessive | Adoring | Generous

He becomes obsessed with a human woman, falls in love with her, and can't stand the idea of her dying. So he drags her to hell, and gives her the world. He lavishes her with his riches and his mansions. He does everything in his power to get her to fall in love with him all while she's trying to convince him to let her go back to the land of the living and live out her life in the natural way.

He's almost convinced, but he's worried that her karma may not send her to hell when she dies. He can't stand the idea of being separated from her for all eternity.

He agrees, under one condition. They are both must be reincarnated, born anew, and twist their life plans to meet one another at a pinnacle point in time. Their meeting is solidified by Fate and woven into their life plans. The only catch when being reincarnated, you must start your life as a human with no memory of your past lives.

She agrees, and she restarts her human existence while Garreth begins for the first time. Soon after she's born tragedy strikes something outside of her life plan. Both her parents passed away.

Gareth is born and chooses to be part of a large family since being the ruler of hell was extremely lonely. He becomes obsessed like his hellish counterpart and hyper focuses on different hobbies growing up. As he gets older, he finds Potions to be his favorite.

Something is wrong with her incarnation. It wasn't agreed upon with the light side of the universe and her existence is cursed.

But because of the twist of fate woven in both of their lives, fate awoke something inside of her that would have never naturally occurred. She could wield and see ancient Magic.

Because of her new found magical abilities at the late age of 16, she's taken to Hogwarts where Garreth Weasley is already a student.

He's mischievous and adoring over her. They both feel it when they first meet some sort of snap into place. After the events of her first year, she absorbs the repositories of Magic and becomes much stronger than any one in the magical world.

Fate twists yet again bringing the two of them together and awakens more powers inside of Garreth. He has access to elemental powers more so than others. He's able to produce and control fire, pyrokinesis.

Together the two of them rule The wizarding world in their own way, twisting the rules and bending them until they feel they are fair for everyone. The choices they make aren't always what's right, but it's what's right in their minds.

They marry eventually, and live their lives to the fullest. In their old age, they find a secluded place to live out their days in peace.

At random times of their life, they both had glimpses of their past agreement. The closer they got to death's door the more they remembered their agreement to each other.

In their human forms, she finally agreed to stay with him in hell, their karma surely sending them there, and he is elated.

In death, he regains his mantle as ruler and she takes his side as ruler as well, so they can do it together.