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#This post is for me because I don't think anyone else will read it
httpscomexe · 1 day
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is chapter 4 of runaway will be coming out soon? just genuinely asking, take your time don't feel rushed!!! i absolutely adore your fics 😍😍
Runaway 4
Summary: Xavier takes others over you, leaving you with Logan's worst nightmare. Staying with Wade Wilson.
(Find What I’m currently writing by checking my pinned post)
Parings: Logan Howlett x Hybrid!Reader
Warnings: Mentions of kidnapping, forced drinking, sexual jokes, fourth wall breaking. (Individual warnings per chapter) This will most likely be a non-con fic.
Word Count: 4155 (Find all chapters here) CH5
P.S. If you’d like to be tagged, ask in the comments, you also have permission to send an ask, but make sure it is NOT anonymous, so I know your username, don’t worry, I’m scared of confrontation too. But this is a SAFE SPACE where I will not judge. Thank you again.
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It becomes sort of a routine with Logan.
Wake up, let him brush your hair, let him choose your clothes, study, eat dinner, let him brush your hair, sleep, and then repeat. Occasionally, he would have days where he was busy, and you knew better than to try finding Wade. Since he’d taken your phone as a punishment, you hadn’t been able to contact anyone else either. But you didn’t think much of it.
And right now, it was morning. The sun was shining through his open curtains, light shining onto your thighs as you sat on the floor, Logan sitting on the bench at the foot of the bed as he brushed through your hair, his fingers occasionally stroking over your ears.
“Okay, what does this word mean?” You held up the book you were reading, and you pointed at a word on the second page.
“Do you know how to say it…?” He asks you, still brushing through your hair, you weren’t sure why he still was, since there weren't any tangles left.
“Sub…Lim…” You try pronouncing the word, stuttering a little. “Inal?”
“Good, now say it all together.” He asks, taking a tie off his wrist to pull your hair up into a ponytail, but he changes his name and continues to brush it.
“Subliminal? What does that mean?”
“Read the sentence, try to figure it out…” He tells you, sectioning your hair now to part it into box braids.
“It says ‘As is typical with this method, no part… particip…ant… participant reported being aware of the sub…liminal faces.’” You struggle a little, and hear him chuckle behind you.
“Good, what do you think it means?”
“Well…” You think about it, trying to remember what Xavier had taught you about root words, and just as you’re about to explain your thought process, there’s a knock at the door, making your ear twitch slightly to the sound. “Ow…” You move your head away, the pointy end of the brush he was using the part of your hair pokes the sensitive skin of your ear.
“Shit… sorry… are you okay?” He quickly gets down to his knees, and his hand fans over your large ear, and there's another knock at the door, the person behind it getting impatient.
“I’m okay Lo, go see who’s at the door.” You gently nudge his hand away, and you watch as he sighs and stands up to open the door, leaving you to gently rub your ear. You weren’t sure why they were so sensitive, but you were sure it was because you weren’t grown in your deer form yet. You’ve only spent a few hours in that form in total in your many years of being alive, so of course, it wasn’t very… developed.
“Jean?” You can’t see too well from your position on the floor, the bed being in your way.
“Hey, I wanted to talk about something, is Bambi here?” You stay quiet.
“No, she’s out with a friend.” He clears his throat, and you understand what to do, you crawl to the other side of the bed so you wouldn’t be visible to Jean.
“Can I come in?” You hear Logan step inside, then lighter footsteps until Jean is sitting on the edge of the bed.
“So Xavier told me…” You hear the bed move a bit more, and assume Logan sat down next to her. “Having her here is too risky.”
“Too… risky?”
“Yes… Considering she’s a hybrid and all.” You hear her sigh. “Obviously, people are searching for those. And if anyone finds out that she’s here… Well… Then we’re compromising the safety of everyone in the mansion.”
“So what? He wants to just throw her out?”
“No, he will provide her with a home and clothes to hide her-”
“It’s not happening.”
“It’s not up to you, Logan.” By this time, your ears were already pinned down to the back of your head, and if you weren’t sitting on your ass, your tail would be between your legs.
“She will die…”
“She’s survived all this time alone already. What difference would there be?”
“Yea she’s survived!” He half shouts and half whispers. “She’s survived because they catch her and hold her like a fucking animal.”
“Logan, why are you whispering? We’re alone.” There’s silence for a few seconds, then a sigh comes from Jean. “Bambi, you can come out.” Your ear perks up slightly, but you don’t move, she wasn’t in control of you.
“Bambi honey, come on out.” You stand to Logan's demand, slowly before crawling onto the bed, sitting near Logan.
“Hey… Sorry.”
“It’s okay.” You tell her, but your ears are still down.
“It’s just… If they find you here, it’s putting everyone else at risk, and Xavier would… Well he’d rather lose 1 hybrid than lose hundreds of mutants.”
“I understand.” You whisper, but your eyes meet Logans.
“When does Xavier want her gone?” Logan's voice comes out gruff.
“As soon as possible. He was hoping this afternoon.”
“And why isn’t he the one telling me this? Why did he send you?” She’s quiet again apart from a sigh. “God he’s a fucking pussy.” His head turns towards you. “There’s a duffle bag in the closet, start throwing our clothes in it Bambi.” He stands up, and Jean stands up with him, a stunned look on her face with wide eyes.
“I’m sorry… Our?” She watches as you disappear into the closet, and her jaw goes slack as Logan follows behind you. “No, no. Logan, you can’t leave.”
“Says who?”
“Says me, Logan. We need you on missions.” She stands at the opening of the closet, and you ignore their conversation, deciding it doesn’t have to do with you.
“You guys will do just fine without me.” He says, reaching over your head to grab a heavy jacket. “Here hun, carry this one. It’s cold outside.”
“Logan-” She grabs his arm, and tries to pull on him. “You can’t-”
“No.” His tone changes completely, from just simple annoyance to straight anger and frustration. He clearly wasn’t happy about Xaviers negligence, and the last thing he needed was the stubborn red head pulling on his arm and telling him he can’t. “I am not leaving her out alone in fucking New York to be kidnapped by another fucking gang.” He pulls his arm away from her and he points in her face. “If you guys need my help so fucking bad, then you better talk to Xavier and figure out a way she can stay here.”
“Logan, there are hundreds of lives on the line, you could at LEAST do the logical thing.”
“The logical thing?” His voice gets louder, and you take a small step away but continue folding clothes and stuffing them into the duffle bag. “I lost my entire fucking family and everyone I knew in my fucking universe, and Bambi is the closest thing I have to family here.”
“The closest thing you have to a family? Logan you fight beside us in missions that could end up with the entire state exploded to dust and what? We’re not your family?”
“No, you’re not. The Jean that was my family is fucking dead, the Xavier that was my family, guess what? He’s fucking dead…” You glance over from the corner of your eye to see Logan take a progressive step towards him with each name. “Ororo, Hank, Scott, everyone that was my fucking family is dead. So excuse me if I don’t want to see a walking fucking corpse every last waking second of my life, and be reminded of my fuck up, everytime I see you motherfuckers…” Jean was now packed into a corner, Logan's face barely inches away from hers, and you can see the way her jaw is clenching. “So don’t you fucking dare tell me what I can, and can not do. I have no connection to you, and will have no fucking problem sending three fucking blades down the centre of your throat.” She doesn’t say anything, only swallowing her spit before her eyes move to yours, still in the closet and frozen in the middle of folding a pair of Logan's jeans before you had become invested in their argument.
You’ve never seen Logan so pissed.
“Fine… Leave.” She looks back up at Logan. “Have the lives of a couple more hundred people in your hands because you left, again.” Shit… You watch as his claws slowly extract from his hands, and you put the jeans down, slowly approaching in case Jean becomes a target.
“You better take that back…” They stare at each other for a long moment. Only the sound of the fan above spinning and the heavy breathing from Logan could be heard through the room.
“Make. Me.” Logan.
“Oh…” He chuckles. Logan…! “Now you’ve done it…” Logan!
“Logan!” Your voice comes out small, and his head twitches a little as he looks over his shoulder. He looks as if he had forgotten you were there. “Can we leave… Please?” You glance down as his claws are hidden back beneath his skin, and it heals over quickly.
“Right…” He growls a little, and backs away from Jean after one last look. “Are you ready then?” He asks, ignoring Jean now as he goes into the closet and lifts the duffle bag, tossing in the last pair of jeans before zipping it up.
“Yes I’m ready…” You stand in the centre of the room awkwardly. “I guess…” You mumble, and Logan sways his hand in front of him, signalling for you to move ahead of him as he grabs his keys, and you’re out of the door quickly, leaving Jean alone in the room, and his arm slides behind your back to walk next to you.
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You were sitting in the passenger seat, watching in the mirror as Logan tossed the bag in the back, slamming the door and making the truck shake a little before getting behind the wheel and starting the engine.
“So where are we going?” He sighs, thinking of an answer to the question with one hand on the wheel as he stares at nothing. Then he reaches into his back pocket, and takes out his phone, handing it to you. “Call Wade.” You take the phone. “Act happy or whatever, and ask if he has space for both you and me…” He growls a little again, looking out his window as you find Wade’s name in his contacts, and you ring it.
“Peanut? And I thought you deleted my number.” The sound of Wade's voice alone was enough to make you smile.
“No, it's me.” You chuckle a little, expecting him to recognise your voice.
“Oh, darling. Bambi, you’re using Logans’ phone. Everything okay?”
“Yes. Everything is fine. But he and I were wondering if you had space for both him and me?”
“They’re kicking him out already?”
“No, they’re kicking me out actually.”
“What? That’s ridiculous. I have the couch, and I have an air mattress that I let Logan sleep on before he left me for one-eye. You guys can obviously stay here.” Logan sighs, but he starts the engine and speaks up.
“Still living under that bridge with Althea?” He asks gruffly.
“Of course, I wouldn't want to leave this humble abode. But peanut?” Logan grunts. “Do you mind picking up dinner? I’ll pay you back. We just need pizza.”
“Sure. What kind?” He turns over his shoulder and begins backing out.
“Hawaiian, no ham. And then just normal cheese.”
“Okay.”
“Thanks pea-” Logan reaches over and hangs up before putting the truck back in forward and he drives out of the parking lot, leaving the mansion behind.
“Can we also get some brownies?” You ask, putting the phone on the centre console.
“Of course, Bambi.”
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“Oh, my two most favourite things ever are here!” Wades’ voice is joyful as both you and Logan walk inside of his little home, the smell of sweat and dog smacking you in the face.
“Male strippers and cocaine?” Another voice comes from a different room.
“Bambi and pizza!” He hugs you, and Logan grunts from behind. “Male strippers is my third favourite, silly.” He calls back, letting go of you and taking the pizza boxes from your hand.
“Hey Bam, how about you go shower, the bathrooms back there.” He points to the room where the other voice came from. Just another person comes out, wearing glasses and with a white afro and walking cane in one hand.
“Who the hell gives birth and names their kid ‘bam?’” She says, feeling around a little for the couch and mumbling something along the lines of ‘why does Wade keep moving the fucking couch.’ “That’s a stupid-”
“Her name is actually Bambi.”
“That’s a little better.” Just a few sentences in conversation between Wade and Althea, and you could tell just how close they really were besides their constant bantering. “Wait, her?”
“I know right? Logan managed to pick up a little girl.” Wade says giddily, placing the pizza boxes on the table and opening them all before taking two cheese, a pineapple, and three brownies.
“Oh then it’s not as surprising, I thought she was your girl.”
“Look, Wade and I need to have a talk.” Logan says suddenly, gently grabbing your arm to get you to look at him. “How about you go take that shower, okay?” You nod, and take some clothes from the duffle bag he's set on the floor.
“I promise the bathroom is the cleanest place in this house.” Wade tells you as you walk by, grabbing a brownie as you pass him. 
“Just ignore Wade's toys, he uses them when Vanessa is around.” Vanessa? “Or whenever Gossip Girls is playing… Wish I was deaf.”
You walk into the bathroom, the sound of Logan's voice disappearing as you close the door, and your eyes immediately land on the large dildo sticking to the wall, which you try your hardest to ignore and not laugh at as you turn on the faucet and remove your clothes.
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With the time that you’re in the shower, Logan takes his time explaining to Wade why they need a place to stay for a while, at least until they find another place.
“God they are such pieces of shit. Like I get where they’re coming from with saving hundreds or saving one, but there’s also like either you save one hundred chickens or you save one unicorn. One’s just more important. You don’t find any mammal hybrids anymore.”
“Exactly, but also Jean got pissed off at me because I told her I’m leaving. Apparently I’m so important and they can’t win without me.” He takes a large sip from his beer, an understatement when half the bottle disappears down his throat.
“I mean they’ve survived and fought so long without this world's Logan before…” Wade tells him, snatching another cheese pizza.
“Look, if I ever end up having to leave…” He sighs, regretting his next words. “Just promise to take care of Bambi. Other than you, she’s all I have left.”
“Wow, talking about me like my life doesn’t matter.” He chuckles, shoving the cheesy bread into his mouth, getting the red sauce on his lips.
“Well you can’t die, she can.”
“Now, now. I was joking, Peanut.” Logan grunts at the use of the nickname.
“What’s this girl's real name anyways?” Althea asks, using a nail fail on her nails, not even realising how incredibly crooked they were becoming.
“No idea, I’ve been calling her Bambi cause… Well, she’s a deer hybrid.”
“Ah, ah. She’s a fawn hybrid.”
“Fawn isn’t a fucking species, it’s an age.”
“Yes, but she’s not a deer.”
“Pretty sure she’s full grown.”
“Maybe in her human form. But she hasn’t spent nearly enough time in her deer form to call herself a deer.”
“What are you talking about…?”
“Look at it this way, if she spent the majority of her life in her deer form, then she’d be a full grown deer, and whenever she turned into her human form, she’d be a toddler. Right now, she’s a toddler in her deer form, AKA, a fawn.” He pauses and looks away from Logan, eyes landing on Althea. “Al honey, if you keep doing that to your nails, they’ll be sharp enough to give someone a Prince Albert piercing.” He looks away from Althea and at a wall. “Readers, I don’t suggest looking that up.”
“Who the fuck are you talking to?” Logan growls, and he can hear the sound of the shower being turned off.
“He does that sometimes, you learn to ignore it.”
“Maybe you do, but you’re blind. He literally just stared at the fucking wall and spoke to dust.”
“Like I said, you get used to it.”
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As you get out of the shower and dry yourself, some sort of talk about walls and dust quickly changes into how Wade is a psychopath. Throughout your entire shower, you were thinking about where you’d be sleeping. Of course, knowing Logan, he’d let you choose between either the air mattress or the couch. The problem is, you didn’t know what’s been done on either of them. You knew Wade pretty well, and judging by the dildo still suctioned onto the wall, he didn’t really care who knew about what he did, and he didn’t mind where he did it. So you were sure there would be stains on either one.
“There she is.” Wade automatically silences the conversation as you walk out of the bedroom and back into the living room wearing only your favourite white lace panties and one of Logans’ hoodies, which looked oversized on your smaller body.
“Want the couch or the air mattress Bambi?” There it is. You still had the towel in your hands, and you were drying your hair as you sat next to him on the couch.
“Yea I had a question for you about that.”
“What’s up?”
“Is the couch even…” You look at Wade. “Clean?” You ask it in the nicest way you can, and the sight of Althea suddenly breaking out in laughter seems to stun Wade.
“Careful now, don’t want to have a stroke.”
“Oh fuck you.” She stops laughing and looks in your general direction. “Want my honest input.” You nod, but then remember she’s blind.
“Yes, please.”
“Sleep on the floor.” She tells you, then stands up with her walking cane, and heads towards her room, closing the door behind her.
“Logan, where would you rather sleep?” You expect him not to answer, and to just tell you that where he sleeps is based on your answer.
“I’d prefer the couch, an air mattress is like sleeping on a damn rock.”
“Can I just… Can I just sleep on you?”
“Oh. My. God. You better say yes, she’s offering to sleep with you.” Wade stands up from the couch, stretching in place before heading to Althea's room. They sleep together?
“Wade, we sleep together all the time.” Logan sighs.
“It was supposed to be a sex joke, Sheldon Cooper.”
“Who…?”
“Ignore it…” Logan holds his hand out, preventing you from saying anything else.
“Goodnight, Peanut. Goodnight, Bambi!” He calls from the room before closing the door, and you can hear the sound of him throwing his jeans down on the floor before the bed in the room creaks under his weight.
“So…”
“What do you mean sleep on me?” Logan asks, interrupting you.
“I mean like… You sleep on the couch, and I sleep on your body. Like you’re my bed.” He stares at you for a moment, as if deciphering your request.
“Yea… Yea, we can do that, that’s okay.” He groans as he stands up, tossing his beer bottle in a pile of more bottles, some broken from previous other bottles being tossed on them.
“I’m gonna eat first though, does Wade have anything to drink?” You ask, standing up as well, and skipping a little to his fridge.
“Ugh… I know he has beer.” He tells you, opening another closet and pulling out a few blankets as you open the fridge and search for something other than alcohol. You simply will not touch it.
“Gross… Is the sink water-”
“Don’t even think about drinking the sink water.”
“What does he give her?” You point down at the slobbery looking dog that’s been snoring this entire time, kicking her legs in her sleep.
“Probably his own saliva.” He tells you, and it almost sounded serious as he covers the couch in clean blankets. “Did you bring your hairbrush?” You nod, walking back over to the couch. “The beer?” He quirks his eyebrow, reaching down to find the hairbrush in the duffle bag.
“Beer is gross.”
“Grab me one then.” You turn back around, opening the fridge again to grab a beer for him. “Sit here.” He points to the couch, and you sit exactly where he’s pointing, and he sits behind you on the back of the couch as you’re seated between his legs.
“Thank you baby.” He takes the beer from your hands, and removes the few braids he was able to get in from that morning and afterwards he pops the beer open.
“How does your ear feel?” He asks once they’re all out, gently touching your ear with his fingers and stroking the fur gently, causing you to purr quietly.
“It’s fine, it was just a poke.”
“Good, I didn’t mean to hurt you Bambi…”
“I know, it was my fault. I moved.” He doesn’t say anything back, instead, he grabs the hairbrush and begins to gently brush through your hair, and again, as always, he’s careful to avoid your ears, using his hands to gently pull threads of your hair off the fur.
“Are you sure you don’t want the couch to yourself?”
“Logan, you know I don’t like sleeping alone.”
“I know, Bamb. Just trying to make conversation.” He tells you, and you reach forward, him gently letting go of your hair so he doesn’t pull it as you grab two cheese pizzas, the pineapple box completely empty.
“You have to drink something.” He continues brushing your hair, occasionally taking a sip of his beer as he focuses on brushing.
“I know, but beer is gross… We can always go out and get apple juice in the morning?” You suggest, and he sighs behind you.
“You haven’t drank anything all day.” He tells you, and you look up and over your shoulder at him as he sets the brush aside and puts more of the liquid in his mouth, you watch as his Adam's apple bobs as he swallows.
“I’ll be alright.” You tell him as he stares down at you, and his right hand finds your chin as he lifts your face up slightly. Then he presses a single kiss to the corner of your lips, pulling back for a moment to take another swig of his beer, and his lips find yours fully now. His fingers squeeze your jaw carefully, but enough to force your own lips open, and he spits the alcohol into your mouth, making you involuntarily pull away but he keeps you still, replacing his mouth with his hand and covering your nose as well so you’re forced to drink the foul liquid.
“Now we either do that about five more times, or you drink the rest yourself.” He tells you, holding the half-filled bottle up to your eye level.
“Fine…” You groan, taking the bottle and sipping from it as he watches you.
“Good girl…” Your tail begins to wag on its own again at his praise and he removes his shirt before lying down on the couch with only a lamp on a small table next to the couch to illuminate a small portion of the room.
“Do I have to drink it all?”
“Just half is okay.” He tells you, and you close your nose before downing half of what he’s given you, hacking a little at the taste.
“Done.” You hold out the bottle to him, and he takes it, swallowing the rest before tossing the bottle towards the rest as before.
“Alright, lie down…” He pats his stomach a little, and you quickly crawl on top of him, taking a soft blanket from the side with you.
“So… since we’re living with Wade now…”
“You don’t have to ignore him…” He answers your question before you even finish asking it, and he shuts off the light behind him, casting the room in darkness, barely seconds later you feel his hand on your head as he gently scratches that spot behind your ear, making you purr.
You were relieved you wouldn’t have to ignore Wade, considering you’d be living with them for who knows how long.
“Just don’t ever sleep with him when I’m not here.”
Tags: @shybluebirdninja @atomicheartbroken @hazydespair
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bunnis-monsters · 3 days
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Good morning, I hope you're doing well.
I've been a shy onlooker of your work for quite some time, however as of recently I've been noticing with a couple of the bee-hybrid ficlets that you've been writing, one or two of them that involved (specifically) child/infant characters were tagged with the 'monster fucker' and various such related tags..?
I love the bee stuff, I do! Please don't take this as a hate message because I really don't mean for it to come off as such. But if you're going to include infant/child characters under the age of 18 in your fics, please don't include them in NSFW scenarios, fics, or situations or put them in NSFW tags. I don't think that's entirely legal in some places and I say that out of the goodness of my heart for your protection and your readers.
There was a woman banned off Youtube who was criminally charged for breastfeeding her child and uploading it and I know this is in no way as severe but I honestly don't want to see you get banned and all your fics wiped off tumblr because you put 'minor characters' in NSFW situations/tags. :(
You could try maybe just not tagging the stuff with baby bees?? You have a huge follow base and a discord (that i'm too shy to join) so I'm sure people would still find that content if they're following you.
I'm sorry for bothering you, I hope you have a good day.
Uh.
I tag all of my fics as monster fucking… because that’s the genre. The baby bees are a result of said monster fucking.
I specifically use monster fucking on all of my posts so people who don’t like the monster fucking genre can easily filter my posts out.
I do not include any smut tags like I do on my other posts, and SPECIFICALLY tag them as “monster sfw” or “monster fluff” when I remember.
Not only have I never sexualized or plan on sexualizing the baby bees, if you or anyone else sees anything regarding them as sexual… idk what to say. They’re the most innocent posts on my page.
Read my REQUEST INFO so you can understand that I do not write for pedophilic relationships or situations. The baby bees are children.
I think you’re reading a bit into it. I’m not sure about that case of a YouTuber being banned for breast feeding, but that’s a real person with real children. These are fanfics. There could have been more behind that, and I know for sure there are cases where parents exploit their children on the internet in ways that are in the grey area, like for example, breastfeeding them and sexualizing it purposefully(breastfeeding isn’t inherently sexual, but it can be sexualized and sold as such to an audience) or having them do things that are suggestive for their pedophile audience to continue using them as a cash cow.
This is not that. The baby bees are fictional, and not once have they been sexualized. I am not interested in doing so. They’ll still be under the monster fucker tag because the baby bees are tied to the bee hybrids which ARE very NSFW. It’s a genre.
I use tags that relate to my post and can help them be easily filtered by those that DON’T want to see my content.
Never ask something like this again, it made me deeply uncomfortable.
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mitsua · 17 hours
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With an MC who likes to post about their dates with them
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Warnings: none Genre: fluff
Series: OM! SWD? MC'S. . . GN!
Words count: 0.74k
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I don't think he'd really like it at first, since you were all the time asking for a picture, for him to pose or smile, and, well, he doesn't really wish to do that.
However, once Asmodeous showed him all the posts you made on every date-how you wrote so highly and cutely about your spent time with him-it made somethings in his heart and pride go up to the stars.
"I'll smile only if you smile too."
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Maybe sometimes is the one who catches you off guard asking you to take a picture of the most random moment on your date just as a joke.
But oh boy when he scrolls down later on and sees you really posted those embarrassing photos, he's gonna be malfunctioning for a while.
Still, as he reads your thoughts about the date on the picture's caption, his mind will race a thousands miles per hour and kick his feet like a little kid (obviously without anyone seeing him).
"Be grateful I'm not charging ya' for those photos!"
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It started as posting about some streamings you watched, then to both your hands shown holding a video game controls, the final blow was when he woke up to an exaggerated amount of posts he'd been tagged on, new hashtags shipping the both of you and some even promoting their pages to read Leviathan x you content.
He was about to go insane, but as you asked him if he wanted you to delete all those posts, he reconsidered and ponder what was wrong on all that.
"It's fine, yes, it's going to be fine only with you by my side."
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He'd get used to you taking a photo before and after entering a new place with him, sometimes a couple more in there. But never thought nor asked what'd you do with those.
Later on, as he read online about new places to take your date to in Devilgram as it seemed to be the most reliable app to ask to, he came across your page and finally saw all you had to comment of your dates.
"I love reading your narrating, however, would you mind telling me by yourself what you thought about it all?"
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When he discovers your passion of publishing about your dates, you've grown accostumed to even going live on a couple of them. Of course the most part of your dates were private, you spent some time exchanging ideas on how to edit or tag your posts.
The only time you really caught him off guard was the time you posted a photo of him fully suited, when you attended to a fancy dinner of your anniversary together, he didn't notice you taking it! Your caption reading: "Hope you know you look beautiful to me in every way you'd never even got to imagine about <3"
His eyes got glassy as he absorbed your words and went immediately to hug you.
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It's an odd thing to him, but doesn't really comment about it unless he thinks you're spending too much time on your D.D.D. your eyes might burn because of being glued to the screen all time.
One day, after an important fangol match of his, some reporters asked permission to publish the photographs taken on their Devilgram account and tag them on it, to which all of them agreed happily. After returning to the HOL he'd look for their team's post and click on your page by mistake, mersmerized with all the love you put on your almost daily posts about your dates with him.
"Uhm... do you want to take a picture of both of us eating this cupcake?"
He'd still have a weird approach, but trust me, he's trying.
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He's between 'I don't like it' to 'I don't care'. Nevertheless, he would smile in a couple of pictures you want to take throughout your time together. But only when he's looking at you.
He won't bother looking to the camera, he'll only stare at you.
The only photo you have of him smiling to something else that was not you was when he was asleep. Probably dreaming of you too-
Sometimes, when he can't sleep, he might scroll down your Devilgram to remember those cute dates of yours.
"That I have to look to that little thing in your phone while you're taking the photo? Why? I want to look at you."
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All writings' rights reserved © 2024 Mitsua. (Credit to the respective owners of the picture and tagged anime character.) ⌇ my navigation!
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green5quirrel · 7 months
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Just watched Grimm: "Map of the Seven Knights" and I continue to be impressed with just how much this show let Monroe be emotional.
I don't know if people appreciate just how incredibly important it is to see a male identified character emote. It is so necessary to show not only a dude be demonstratively upset with grief and sadness but that Grimm gives absolutely no judgement from any of the other characters toward Monroe for expressing those feelings.
Even when Monroe apologizes, the other characters in the scene are quick to express that it's fine. Because it IS fine. It's absolutely and incredibly fine to sob when seeing your beloved family member murdered in front of you. It's fine to have an emotional reaction to your ex girlfriend giving her life for yours. It's fine to have an emotional reaction to your friend being killed in your house while you were distracted by impulsivity. It's fine to have an emotional reaction to being kidnapped and tortured and threatened with violent death for simply loving your partner. And it's fine to get choked up when trying to express gratitude for being saved from said experience. AND it's fine to have the same reaction to having a flashback that your partner talks you back from.
I hold true that Monroe was and is such an important character for people who society identifies as guys to see. The expectation of being stoic or emotionally constipated or angry over sad is such a powerful thread in the fabric of how a lot of culture views masculinity. Having permission to express emotions is so important. And seeing a character that is incredibly strong and intelligent be validated to express emotions is super heckin' important.
And, as always, Silas delivered those performances in truth and realness. Nothing seemed forced or posed. I truly miss seeing acting like that and wish I could see more of it in genre shows. Or perhaps I'm just currently enamored by my fixation too much to notice it in other media.
At any rate, dudes deserve fuller representation.
Ladies deserve that too but for completely different reasons that I'd need a whole other entry to delve into.
And us nonbinary people? Well, we're getting along with what we've got. Like...3 people. But, you know what, I'll take it.
Bottom line, showing guys that are allowed to have a full range of emotions on screen and in media allows guys in the real world to (hopefully) feel permission to express those emotions in a healthier way. We need healthy emotions to be healthy and safe people. And we need validation and to feel safe expressing them.
So, there.
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genericpuff · 8 months
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#and before anyone who hates my shit says “yeah because you ARE a loser way to have self awareness for once”#i promise you this would be me with or without the LO fandom LMAO#anxiety is a hell of a thing#and as much as i internally guilt myself into thinking it would be better if i just shut up and hid away forever#i also know that's the trauma speaking because the adults around me always told me to shut up#and even as an adult i still encounter people who talk over me and make me feel like i'm not allowed to be outspoken#but the pen is mightier than the sword and all those years i've spent being spoken over i've been honing my penmanship#i have fun talking about the things i talk about and i don't have any less right than anyone else to do it#i am cringe and i am free#self post#vent post#altho on another note i do wanna make time this week to go find new series to read#too many of my favorites have turned to shit and it's taken its toll#i KNOW there are better comics out there that are genuinely well made#i already have a few that i'm reading that i love but i need to balance out the good with the bad more lol#i just need to take the time to go find good stuff instead of pouring so much of my attention into the bullshit that doesn't deserve my tim#i think both things can be true#i can have a lot of fun dissecting and writing about series i don't like#while also nourishing myself with good works that restore my faith in this medium#“perfectly balanced as all things should be”
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Something I've been thinking a lot about lately is how everyone thought Egon had gone insane. What Happened that made them think that. They've fought a gigantic Stay Puft Marshmellow Man TWICE (counting the 2009 video game because iirc it's canon? Correct me if I'm wrong), fought an interdimensional god, fought a blood thirsty ruler that killed thousands and was hated by all that was trapped in a painting (and managed to get in to beat him by making THE STATUE OF LIBERTY start walking down the street with slime that reacted purely based on vibes), found an underground abandoned transit system full of the moodslime, had a bathtub try to eat Dana and her baby, fought a giant murderous black widow lady, fought the fisherman ghost who turned an entire hotel floor into the bottom of a ocean, and that's not even mentioning them getting trapped on an island that randomly raised up from underwater that had been abandoned for decades created by Ivor Shandor who worshipped Gozer. So what did he do or say that made everyone else think he'd gone insane?? All I can think is maybe he was acting strange / eratic before, but he's always been like that to some degree.
I don't know. It's something that I've been thinking about. The correct answer is 'it's not that deep and they needed a reason that the others weren't together anymore and weren't aware of Egons death or know what was going on,' but also. What Was He Saying that prompted everyone, including Ray, to think he lost his mind when he'd been right almost every time before that.
I'm genuinely so curious as to what he was up to before this. What was he doing. What insane idea was working on prior to this or was he even working on anything at all??
Also want to clarify this post isn't negative 😭 I really love the newer movies and their lore / the newer storyline / characters, I just like thinking about small stupid things like this. Gives me something to think about / speculate about / figure out an answer to.
#ghostbusters#egon spengler#nikolas posts#I have so many thoughts on it because I've just been rewatching the two movies on loop for the past few days.#All we got was Ray saying that he'd started talking about the end of the world (IIRC) and that he went insane and took everything#when he eventually left to deal with it on his own#which for the record it's extremely impressive that he would've stopped Gozer from returning BY HIMSELF. The only reason it hadn't worked#was because of the electricity issue#Hiding all the traps and setting up the proton packs to fire at the hell pit?? Insanity. He's just on a complete different level of existin#Like they were aware of Ivor Shandor and his plans long before??? They found his ISLAND DEDICATED TO GOZER who had full intention of#BRINGING THEM BACK#it's really Really REALLY not this deep but I have thoughts and I wanted to share them. Maybe someone else might have an idea I#couldn't think of or might have something to add.#I guess it could be a 'they beat Gozer once and assumed they were gone' but that wasn't the first time Gozer 'died' so??#if I missed something Please tell me. I haven't watched the newer movies as much as the older ones (I grew up watching them / playing#the game so I'm more familiar with the older lore and haven't had the chance to rewatch the newer ones 1000 times over unfortunately)#so it's entirely possible I missed something#I'd think maybe it was just because they were older but I really don't think thats the case. I have reasoning for it but I need to do#the math to make sure I'm getting the ages right by the time AfterLife happens.#really need to make a chart / timeline of all the events that happened and what year / month / day they happened. That's a project#for tomorrow perhaps.#anyways if anyones reading this sorry for the insane rambling and congrats for making it to the end#also this post isn't negative I adore the newer movies so much. I love them a lot and I genuinely don't really care about this at all#just a thing to think / ponder / speculate about if that makes sense#I enjoy thinking about stupid irrelevant stuff like this#so so so many thoughts
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cerise-on-top · 11 days
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hello dere simon (am i getting ur name right???)
First of all, lemme just say, i absolutely adore ur works n writing style!! Ur so talented!! Keep being u :3
anyways,
Not sure if u write for her, but could u do Farah with a super, like, out-of-pocketly romantic, gender neutral s/o? (Keep it sfw, if u could :P)
Like,
'Hey, can you pass me a snack?'
"How am i supposed to pass you to yourself?"
'W -- .. what?'
"What?"
'Huh?'
"Yeah, sure. Here!" (throws bag of chips at her) "I love you!"
'..Huh??'
Hey there! And yeah, you are! I do go by Simon online :> And thank you, that's very kind of you :> I hope you can enjoy this as well, then! And don't worry, my blog is entirely SFW, I don't post smut ^^
Farah with an Overly Romantic S/O
I’m sorry, but I actually feel as though Farah wouldn’t get as flustered as you described her to be. She’s a confident woman, who knows her worth. I think she’d actually quip back at you:
Hey, can you pass me a snack?
How am I supposed to hand you to yourself, sweetheart?
Well, I would prefer something overly sweet right about now. Come here.
Farah knows her worth. Years of being talked down upon, years of being degraded and treated as something subhuman filled her with a certain kind of rage that I couldn’t even begin to describe if I tried. She’s not going to get shy around you. Sure, she can be extremely sweet towards you too, but she’s probably not going to get too flustered if you’re being overly romantic towards her. She’s suffered enough, don’t you think you deserve a soft epilogue, my love? She certainly believes so. In fact, she can be quite playful, so I think she might actually just try to fluster you instead, whether it be in Arabic or English doesn’t matter to her. Besides, if you get too cocky around her, she will push your buttons as well. Oh, you wanna kiss her so bad, don’t you? It actually makes you look stupid. Well, she’s going to take advantage of that. If you rile her up enough, despite not being the tallest, she will trap you against the wall and work her charm. In spite of everything that has happened to her, she hasn’t given up entirely on love yet. Sure, it seems unlikely to someone like her, but if there’s a will there’s a way. She will playfully tease you instead, doing everything she can to fluster you. She’s extremely grateful to have found someone, who loves her despite everything, though. Yes, she’s kinda messed up, she has to consider her every move carefully before she’s being branded a terrorist by the rest of the world. The fate of her people resides upon her shoulders, after all. But underneath all of that? She’s actually a really loving and sweet woman, who would love nothing more than to ride a motorcycle with you and gaze upon the stars of Urzikstan with you. If she’s being soft? Don’t tease her. She lets her walls around you for once, it’s more than anyone else ever gets to experience.
#cod#cod x reader#call of duty#call of duty x reader#farah karim#farah karim x reader#I write about the entire main cast of the mw reboot 👍#except for M.akarov and his cohorts. I only write about him when I feel like it and don't take requests for him#and also no shepherd because... I do not like him in the slightest...#I would write some ran.dom blur.bs about other characters too but I only got the 141 on my mind at all times ¯\_(ツ)_/¯#those are actually an insight into my twisted mind (it's full of fluff and nothing else because life is angsty enough as it is)#like why would I wanna write about someone dying when I could just??? have them hug me instead??? hello?????#I could go into further detail as to what my rand.om blur.bs actually are but I don't think anyone cares about that ^^#Got some good ones in my drafts and queue as well but I only post them when I get no requests#I got five requests on the day I'm writing this...#but regardless of whether or not I get a request I'm gonna post something extra next Monday because I can :3#nothing too special but something that means the world to me!#maybe I can think of more things to write for that specific topic too? maybe :3#got something in mind for the big Austrian lad! Would be a shame if I didn't include him as well all things considered :3#anyway welcome to my tags! I always ramble here because no one reads these and cares about what I have to say so I'm free!!!#my friends don't talk to me and I always have plenty to say so everything goes here :3
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tricksterlatte · 8 months
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Anyone else think short form social media based on algorithms designed to promote topics that create more engagement instead of more joy, the idea of fast fashion but conveyed through social media, and the fact you can monetize suffering and outrage better than ever has largely resulted in the death spiral of media literacy and the mass emergence of bad faith readings?
#I may be venting a lil but god it blows my mind#fyp is a blessing and a curse because i don't think ppl were ever meant to be subjected to this many ppl at once#god i took a bird site hiatus for weeks and now BARELY check it and it already feels like a hit#oughhhhh#even fandom spaces have hugely incorporated marketing and networking into them bc of cmms and sponsorship and building portfolio#which would be fine tbh if it weren't for the way socmed is designed#now it's like you can't support too many ppl or else you're shadow banned or you have to make yourself palatable and marketable#and websites with threads in which people will only read the first post before qrting because ratios are seen as five minutes of fame#features that permit beating an algorithm are locked behind a paywall that promises you money if you go viral#and what goes viral is usually incendiary content meant for those ratios or trends. whether for or against OP#even in hobbyist spaces the climate has changed so much due to the monetization and marketing and just. ugh#not to mention side accounts dedicated to gossip in this new priv account culture like...idk#if you have to make another account so you can make fun of a friend on main with selected priv friends it just doesn't sit well with me#and not every priv account does this but enough do and it makes me tired#unsolicited hate comments are still as bad as they used to be on ff dot net except now people openly are proud of it more#why do most socmed feel like passive aggressive sticky notes on high school lockers#there is so much more I could say about everything that has left me weary about the internet but I don't know the time or place#and I don't want anyone to think this is about them because it's a general statement. though if you are doing the more inflammatory things.#maybe rethink that. it's not good for anyone else and it's not good for you either#I keep coming back online to check on ppl and see art and I *know* it's draining for my health every time#but I feel a lot better now that i use socmed less overall. and that I try to focus on what makes me happy#it just sucks seeing so many people i care about endure absolutely wild struggles bc people online do not care.#I like rambling in my tags because this is the only place I ramble except my personal journal and to my wife
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zimszim · 3 months
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the scene where the doctor tells kate that he doesn't have kids yet is such a crazy ass thing to say just randomly but i love how when kate tells him that she never knew he had a granddaughter based off of the stories her father told her as a child, he tells her "I was a different Doctor back then, Kate. Great enigma. Still can't shake it off. I'm trying." which is so heartbreaking and it crushes me because it's already so apparent how badly he wants to change from this closed off, holds everything in his heart and then one day he'll die type of person. he wants to be better than that. for himself, for his friends. and he fails sometimes too, he gets closed off, like in rogue, he just tries to move on but ruby doesn't let him. but even that, he doesn't hug her fully, with all of his grief and fear. he's still holding back, but he's trying. and it hurts him. he's trying to be open and truthful and with that openness i feel like he's realizing just how painful life is without all those fortified walls up, how deeply grief can seep into him, but inversely, how fierce he can love and hate and fear and hope!!! everything is brighter and burns hotter when those barricades are down and its for the best and worst
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x-adoringvoid-x · 4 months
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Apparently that's called the 'irresistible force paradox'
#oc f/o#f/o art#fictional other#self shipping#self insert#oc#original character#they're patient with me#also I finally draw Hadri with a different form!#I want to do more with their shape shifting but I haven't made much that turns out well#small vent in tags upcoming if you don't want to read#Feeling bad about posting but I shouldn't just give up#In some way social media isn't for me because I take things too personally#but if I'm going to meet people I have some common ground with I don't know where else I'd look#common ground with something that means something to me#I want to meet people that don't suck to talk to#And actively have things they want to talk to me about that we're both interested in#Tired of being just ears.#I'm talking about my family here not anyone on the site btw#I just wish there were people who wanted to talk in the same way I want to talk#same level of energy I guess#Sorry to vent in silly drawings but it is what it is#Fun fact if you read this far...Hadri would like Evangelion#I don't know why that came to mind today but it makes total sense#They're a deity-like person so religion is interesting and they'd be drawn in by the drama#I honestly don't know how they'd examine media since their setting is basically medieval so Hadri's never really watched anything#Maybe a play?#I'd be nice to know what Hadri would think of things I like#But my tastes are very colorful... watched Ind/go Park for example and have it stuck in my head now#Popp/ playtime and Ind/go Park seem to both be going for fnaf Portal and I am feeling something
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leafy-m · 6 months
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My stupid story is 20k now how I do make it stop 😵
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supercantaloupe · 1 year
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truly detest how pcos tags/forums/etc are absolutely crawling with terfs
#(okay to rb but stay in your lane)#maybe i just want to look and see if anyone else has experienced what i went through today without seeing someone going like#'you'll never be a REAL woman because you DON'T HAVE OVARIES#and will NEVER understand the TRUE WOMANLY EXPERIENCE of having A VERY DISRUPTIVE AND COMPLEX ENDOCRINE AND METABOLIC DISORDER'#like i think there are more important (read: actual) targets to direct our frustration at here than#[checks notes] getting mad at a trans woman for saying she relates to some of the problems caused/faced by having pcos#like. idk. the fucking medical system and lack of research/treatment options#(also. christ. reducing every person w pcos into the 'woman' category automatically bc 'ovary'.#even though it's literally an intersex condition. yikes.)#also i don't know about y'all but i don't wish this on anyone? regardless of gender??#i actually don't want trans women to have to experience this in order to be considered a True Woman#because i don't want ANYBODY to have to experience this. it sucks! it's not fucking fun!#i just wanted to try and see if other people have gone through the same thing i have. not expand my blocklist by half a mile tonight.#i wanna talk about me#even though i didn't exactly find what i was looking for (😔) and i had to play fucking whack-a-terf while searching#if there's any bright side to be found it's the number of posts/people affirming pcos as an intersex condition/identity#i saw someone say 'if you don't want the [intersex] umbrella for yourself you don't have to take it#but it's nice to have in the closet for a rainy day'#and. man. yeah.
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babygirlbdubs · 2 years
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i hate!!! labels!!!!! i hate society's need to put every bit of the human experience into arbitrary, meaningless little boxes!!! i hate taking beautifully unique experiences and shoving them into categories that will never truly fit them!!! i hate taking people's identities and comforts and using them to invalidate their personhood and experiences!!! every single human being is impossibly unique and there will never be a single other person exactly like them and that's beautiful!!! why!!! do we have to break everything down and put it into boxes that are never perfectly the right shape!!!! we are all unique and that makes us all the same!!! let people express their personhood and define their experiences in ways that are unique to them!!!
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non-un-topo · 1 year
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The irony of trying to start a "pain journal" but being too fatigued and having too much brain fog from said pain to start one
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mementoasts · 1 year
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jonathan sims head archivist of the magnus institute london
#IM JUST POSTING HIM RANDOMLY BECAUSE I CANNOOOOOT FOR THE LIFE OF ME DRAW ANYONE ELSE. I HAVE APHANTASIA MAN IT'S HARD OUT HERE#i just started season 3 and heard him mention the graying hair i was like hm.. what if i tried drawring some characters.#i'm actually super happy with how he looks... i had some prior inspiration bc i followed one artist who's posted fanart b4--#(which is how i first heard of the series) and so i already kinda had a picture of him in my head bc of that (i love their art sdfghgfdjh)#so i was jus sketchin and i was like.... yeah this looks ok. i wanted his hair to be kinda just pokin up every which way in front--#--because i imagine him constantly running a hand through it. otherwise it'd look nice n tidy. i just sketched til it looked good enough#the eyes were easy because i wanted sharp and tired. the color was just me testin shit out and being like oooo that looks pretty#the outfit..... i just googled some like business casual stuff LOL. i thought it looked nice#bag and flashlight because he's dungeon crawling#he's also filipino for no reason other than i said so#OHHH YEAH freckles. freckles are cute. also worm scars.#i gotta say i didn't wanna put glasses on him but i thought he looked nakey without em.. but also it might be bc i was strugglin w lineart#the glasses make him look younger i think. which is bad!! he needs to look at least 35!!!#i dunno if i have it in me to draw the others;;;;;;;;;; martin i can't figure out a color scheme for-- and tim & sasha.... waauugghhh....#it's hhhhaaardd because when i'm like reading anything i cannot *picture* characters.... i just get like..... a feeling yknow.....#again i already had some vague images for jon (and martin) bc i saw fanart before lol so that's what showed up in my head#i have a good *feeling* of what sasha should look like but i cannot for the life of me draw it....#i keep sketching and going “noo this doesn't look like her” <- i DON'T know what she looks like#i've somehow instead ended up with a sketch that really feels like melanie tho lmao#if you're somehow at the bottom of this long ramble i will send you $500.#the void given form
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sisterdivinium · 1 year
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It's interesting to stroll around Fanlore reading discussions that took place in 2007 talking about the fractured nature of fandom on LJ and people interacting without having enough context (as in commenting on a post they did not read by a user they do not know) when you're living in 2023 and people distribute likes without reading anything or commenting; when there's supposedly "drama" of unknown origins happening in more than one website at the same time because there's no real "home base" for fandom activity anymore; and we're all carrying on with our lives reblogging things without even looking at previous notes and reactions to that same post even if out of simple curiosity...
#what gets me is the lack of discussion. i don't expect anyone to approach things in a more ~intellectual manner no#but i guess i expect a little more than what i see. i'd *like* to see a little more. more than just personal unfounded opinion#idk i have the distinct feeling that we're all screaming into the void only louder and louder and louder#(you will never convince me that twitter is a good place for discussion because it just isn't. it wasn't made for that#it doesn't support it. its very quick structure is part of why so many people have long recognised it as toxic social media)#(it's talking over one another in fragments. if you agree on there all is peachy but if you don't then lol good luck)#anyway. again. i do know tumblr isn't exactly proper for any of this either; the dashboard isn't designed for it#but it's not like i can convince anyone to switch to a slower and more text/reflection-based platform either now can i#i think about migrating every day but then i'd REALLY be screaming into the void#silly blabbering#i'm allowing myself to post this on this blog because it isn't strictly WN related but also it is. i hate twitter fandom lol#(also if you're wondering yes i did read that one for the bakhtin. in this house we love and support bakhtinian studies)#(just in case my last little essay on wn didn't clue you in regarding that lol)#ALSO i love the fact that the post (the actual post. if you click the link and follow through to the original post. which you should)#links to another post that goes to another post (i love these link black holes) where the author voices things i feel too lol#about crafting extensive essays and the expectation regarding their response#i sometimes think that LJ fandom is what made me choose my degree#why am i seeing myself through someone else's words written in 2006 ksjdfhksdjjhksdgjsd#and yeah yeah we should respond to other people too -- but how when no one is writing the sort of thing you want to/can reply to?#i'm not interested in the colour of beatrice's knickers (not that anyone has talked of that... afaik... but you get what i mean)
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