#akutagawa i know what you are and why you made that deal

[bramfangs]

believer of the theory that when akutagawa made the deal with atsushi he thought he wouldn't be alive to fight him...

[lit3rallyll0yd]

heeeello, I wanted to order the bungou stray dogs guys with a s/o who always cries when she drinks, like she's a bigger lightweight than Chuuya and also gets really clingy when she's drunk

bsd men with a lightweight, clingy soulmate

dazai, chuuya, atsushi, akutagawa, kunikida, ranpo

warnings: drinking, lowercase writing, short because i feel crappy</3

a/n: writing with nails is a pain, but not impossible!!

taglist: @justcallmesakira @atlasnessie @riiwrites @silverbladexyz <3 luv u guys!! comment to be added!!!

dazai

finds it absolutely adorable when you sob at the smallest of things when you drink.

first time he witnessed your lightweight behavior, it was your friends 18th birthday party and you were offered a drink...then it escalated to more then two...

he found you on the floor of the guest room with your friend, who was embarrassed for you.

"she was fine when you left, but then i heard her cry, saying you left her forever..."

he shakes his head with a soft smile, and motions your friend to leave.

when they did, he walked to your figure and brushed your hair out of the way of your face.

"my sweet'bella~ missed me that much~" he teased and kissed your cheek softly as you stared up at him and wrapped your arms around him and cuddled into his arms.

"i was gone for a mere 5 minutes.."

"hic- ihit felt like hic- 5 years.."

you closed your eyes and fell asleep in his arms, not feeling his soft lips kiss your head and rock you back and forth on the floor.

he wrapped his trench around you when he decided to sleep with you on the floor as well.

he made sure to keep in mind, "just 5 drinks...it's all it takes.."

chuuya

"CHUUUUYYYAHahahaa..."

"WHAT-what happened?!"

your eyes were watery, and your nose was runny

"i banged my knee..."

you came home drunk off your mind, and he already knew he was going to have to deal with your hangover, so he took the responsibly to take care of you.

you were on your knees on the carpet of your bedroom floor, making grabby hands at your boyfriend who sighed loudly, closing the door after him as he walked toward your body.

he lifts you up with a grunt and sat down on the bed with you on his lap, his hand rubbing your knee as you sniffled into his sleeve of his t-shirt.

it's only been 2 hours, and chuuya was ready to pass out because it was almost like he was taking care of a toddler.

"i thought you feel asleep, 2 hours ago!" he complained, now combing his fingers through your hair.

"i waaaassss!!!"

"then why aren't you?"

"ihi feel off reaching for the remoooote!!" you hung off his arms and your head rested on your pillow and closed your eyes.

chuuya couldn't move; however he didn't want to move.

he looked at you and chuckled softly before pressing a kiss to your arm that rested on your lap ontop of him.

atsushi

please, my boy is so confused

he had the same amount of alcohol as you, and your more drunk then a child on a sugar high.

your clinging onto him for the rest of the night, sobbing into his sleeve the moment you lose him and find him again.

"y/n...i went to go to the bathroom!"

"I THOUGHT YOU LEFT ME FOREVERRR!!!!"

he gives 10x the hugs and kisses you want.

at home, he would try to put you to sleep in your own bed while he sleeps on the couch because right now, although he helped you bathe for 30 minutes you still smelled like alcohol, and you kick in your sleep when you get like this.

he would know, he learned the hard why :(

"NAHO!! dohon't leeeeave!!"

"ow-ow-ow, y/n that's my hair- OW!!"

you ended up pulling him into your arms and wrapped your legs around his torso and fell asleep in two seconds.

he didn't fight you and just kissed your head and combed his fingers through your hair.

akutagawa

so, he doesn't drink as much as you think.

so seeing you get drunk after 4 drinks; he decided to keep you away from alcohol as much as he can....but he didn't know how without it seem like he was controlling.

the two of you were still at the bar, however you kept poking at his cheek in a way to annoy him.

"ryu...ryu..psst...ryu?"

"y/n!"

he glared at you, and you just giggled.

"hehe you look pissed!"

he took a deep breath in and out and looked at you, "and you're drunk..."

"PFFT!"

you cackled, slapping his arm and clung onto it soon after..

"mm..you have such strong arms~"

was that meant to fluster him?

well, it did.

he blushed and pushed you away, but you came right back, poking his bicep.

you closed your eyes as you rested your head on his shoulder.

"child. you are a literal child.." he rolled his eyes, interlocking his fingers with yours.

he stopped talking to take notice to your soft snoring, the bar was barely full, and the clocked read 11: 45...without any other choice, he took you to your place...making sure you woke up with at least some memory of tonight.

kunikida

"y/n. i'm working.."

"ahand i'm the president!!"

"more like drunk.."

you pulled his cheek and pinched his nose at the same time, making him look like a deformed potato.

he knews how lightweight you are, he made sure to write it down. he also made sure to write down how mnay drinks it takes for you to get drunk...which is 5...only 5.

to this day, he still has no idea how you do it!

he's not a pda kinda guy, so when ypu keep touching him or poking him when he doesn't know he will tie you up, i kid you not, you know how dazai tied up atsushi in that one episode with the mushroom- yeah...

"kuniiiiiiii!-OWAHAO!" you whined, falling off the chair he tied you in and banged your head on the floor.

he turned to see you on the floor and tears roll down your face.

he looked at you with a deadpan expression and you only cried more, rubbing your eyes as you still laid on the floor.

with a sigh, he stands from his desk and walked toward you, hoisting you up in his arms and rested you on another desk and checked your head.

"you're fine, y/n...just banged your head a little..." he kissed your wound and hugged you in a way to get you to stop crying.

even though it was a small bump, when your drunk like this; even a feather could hurt you.

ranpo

he knew.

he already knew by your first sip he will have to deal with what was about to come his way.

and he was okay with that.

he LOVES it when you act all baby around him; t's almost like he's now in control and can just say anything and you'll agree.

your face was buried into the table you and yosano sat at, and your muffled sobs caught the attention from others at the bar.

she sighs and takes a sip of wine before noticing ranpo return, "ranpo, come get your girlfriend...she thought i was you 10 times now!"

you felt someone's hands on your shoulder and you looked up to see ranpo smirking down at you, "i';m wounded...we don't even look alike...is she that drunk?" he teased, kissing your inner lip and you whined, the dried tears on your cheeks gave you an uncomfy feeling.

"nooo- kiss me properly!!" you begged, making grabby hands at you and he laughed; "no, i don't think you deserve any~ you can't even recognize your own boyfriend?!"

after you whining, ranpo gave into you and kissed your lips more times then you haved asked for.

but are you complaing?

nope!

[pinkykats-place]

Bungo Stray Dogs BL Fic Recs

Archive of our own

Disclaimers!

None of the stories linked are mine.

Some contain mature content.

Read tags. Check Ratings.

GIF not mine.

Note: If you read any of these stories and like them please let the author know with a kudos and/or comment!

Shin Soukoku (AkuAtsu)

Dragonfruit by CheeseSandwjch

Summary: Akutagawa shows up at Atsushi’s house injured from a mission; Atsushi takes care of him.

{One Shot}

Rated - Teen & Up

The Cat and the Coat by lunakoroleva

Summary: It's pretty convenient that Dazai lends Atsushi his coat when he's paired up with Akutagawa. It's pretty convenient that it's cold as hell.

Akutagawa gets his first kiss. Rashomon is warm. Atsushi acts like a cat.

{One Shot}

Rated - General Audiences

Seven Days to Fall In Love with Akutagawa Ryuunosuke by its_just_me27

Summary: “Yeah,” Atsushi looks down, purposefully avoiding eye contact. “So, you have to stay here for the next seven days,” he mumbles quickly.

“Excuse me?”

“Y—you heard me,” he huffs. “I can’t help it.”

Complete | 7 Chapters

Rated - Teen & Up

Silver Lining by maxxstrom

Summary: Finding out that a lie has pervaded years of your life isn’t exactly a great way to end a mission, especially when it results in complete ignorance about your own biology. At twenty years old, Akutagawa had thought he was done learning about himself, but that doesn’t seem to be the case at all. As it turns out, he hardly knows a thing.

Alternatively, asexual “beta” Akutagawa finds out that he’s actually an omega and has to figure out how to deal with his first ever heat (a series of unfortunate events that ends with Aku getting railed within an inch of his life).

{One Shot}

Rated - Explicit

A Push in the Right Direction by PocketsizedDinosaur

Summary: Five times Rashomon and Beast Beneath the Moonlight try to get their users together and one time they finally manage to do it on their own.

Complete | 2 Chapters

Rated - General Audiences

If you’re brave enough to love the ones you hate the hardest (you might find home) by bloodyhalefire

Summary: For people like Gin and Ryuunosuke, things like love, comfort, and contentment have never been anything more than pipe dreams.

However, when Gin returns home from work one night to find Atsushi and Ryuu sleeping together on the sofa, she wonders if maybe they aren’t as unattainable as she thought.

{One Shot}

Rated - Teen & Up

I'll call your name by caramelt

Summary: “Of all places to discuss the case,” Atsushi said as they made their way back to the busy crowd, voice getting louder with every step as he fought to compete with the noise around them. He had finished his chazuke not long ago. “Why a summer festival?”

“Has it not occurred to you that I'm taking you out on a date?”

Oh. Oh.

 — — —

Basically Akutagawa and Atsushi get together fluff.

{One Shot}

Rated - Teen & Up

I Love You (deeply) by SapphireSunstone

Summary: Akutagawa almost wishes he hadn’t heard it.

He wishes that there wasn’t another figure pressed up against him underneath his own bedsheets. Wishes that he hadn’t invited Atsushi to stay for the night when he realised how dark it had gotten. Wishes he hadn’t opened the door when the were-tiger had knocked.

Because now he has to deal with this.

{One Shot}

Rated - General Audiences

Series: Adventures in Partnership by guyfierimpreg

Summary: Partnership is a rocky road, but with Atsushi ramming down the clutch and Akutagawa working the shifter, they might actually get somewhere.

3 Works

Rated - General Audiences and Teen & Up

Stay by Glenraven

Summary: The port is loud with the caws of sea birds, the creak and clang of cranes and shipping containers, the rough calls of workers. Atsushi’s ears pick up all of the cacophony but parse none of it. All he can focus on are the words spoken by the dark figure in front of him, quietly, almost as though he is of half a mind not to be heard.

“Go out with me.”

Atsushi blinks. His ears don’t lie, but this isn’t making any sense.

“What?”

Akutagawa growls. “You heard me. Go out with me. This weekend. Let’s go somewhere.”

A hint of red crawls over Akutagawa’s cheeks. He wouldn’t blush if this were just a joke, would he?

{One Shot}

Rated - Teen & Up

and it was you by spirallings

Summary: Rashomon was Ryuunosuke's armor and his clothing created Rashomon. Even when his relationship with Atsushi bloomed into something more intimate, there was always that hesitation, that fear; to be vulnerable was to leave himself open for pain and hurt.

And then there wasn't anymore.

{One Shot}

Rated - Explicit

i just wanna know you by Wordless_Writer

Summary: "If he knew more, he supposed, about Akutagawa, about his pasts, his tics, his wishes... he wouldn't be having such a hard time right now. He'd know what to get him. How to... congratulate him...

Akutagawa hadn't been at the 'we defeated the guild' party and hadn't been mentioned in the local newspaper. When people approached Atsushi on the street, they never mentioned the person who had helped him. Who had been right next to him in the very picture that was published but cut out from the shot.

Atsushi didn't like Akutagawa... but he had helped so much... he deserved some..."

//////////////

or post guild arc atsushi tries to figure out how to congratulate aku

{One Shot}

Rated - SFW

With the Warmth of Your Arms, you Saved Me by Glenraven

Summary: Atsushi sputtered, eyes widened and cheeks red. Ryuu could practically watch his brain malfunctioning at the nickname. Since he was still wearing his shirt, he summoned a few tendrils of Rashoumon and had them wrap loosely around Atsushi’s wrists.
“Can you keep them there for me, sweetie?” he smiled. “I need the use of both my hands to worship you.”
Atsushi simply nodded, tugging lightly at the restraints to test their give. He could have easily ripped through them, but Ryuu knew that he liked the resistance and needed the reminder. He tended to have trouble keeping his hands off of Ryuu, and though Ryuu preened at being so irresistible, sometimes he really did like his dessert to sit quietly.
_______
Ryuu makes it very clear to Atsushi how much he treasures him.

{One Shot}

Rated - Explicit

A Mind as Clear as Day by BrainRotgoBrrrrr

Summary: Atsushi woke up to nothing.

Just, plain, white, nothing at all.

He blinked. He could hear things. People. Machines. Whirring and talking.

He remembered his name. That was all. It floated around in his mind, bouncing and echoing until he heard it clearly in his ears.

or

Atsushi loses his memory and wakes up in hospital, feeling unsafe and not knowing to trust those around him

Incomplete | 5/? Chapters

Last Updated November 2023

Rated - Teen & Up

Dazai x Chuuya x Atsushi x Akutagawa

Unexpected Heat by Princess_Cherry

Summary: Akutagawa almost never even got his heat, Mori and Yosano agree that the cause is a combination of his sickness and his malnutrition as a child, his body couldn’t afford to have his heat often but once in a blue moon he got his heat and no one was ever ready for it

———————-

In which Akutagawa goes into unexpected heat and his mates need to be there for him.

One Shot | OmegaVerse

Rated - Explicit

Love to spare by Princess_Cherry

Summary: Dazai smiled, he felt blessed to have these three people in his life.

He really had love to spare. 
— — —

In which Akutagawa, Atsushi, Chuuya and Dazai celebrate their 2nd anniversary, it starts wholesome but quickly turns steamy.

{One Shot}

Rated - Explicit

Pretty Kitty by scribespirare

Summary: Certain things make Atsushi...well, lose control, so to speak.

{One Shot}

Rated - Explicit

electric by quitepossiblyjanuary

Summary: They're always a little sloppy, but it's one of Atsushi's favorite parts about them, that messiness. He loves the feeling of Akutagawa's nose squished up against his face, changing every few minutes because Akutagawa likes to tilt his head this way and that, testing which angle is best for sliding his tongue against Atsushi's lips. He loves the feeling of Akutagawa's lips slipping and catching on his chin, his cheeks, as they blindly move their mouths against each other, eyes closed and too happy to care about neatness.

{One Shot}

Rated - Explicit

Something, Somehow by the_cricket

Summary: Atsushi doesn't meet Dazai by the river, and he doesn't join the agency. He saves himself from starving and figures out how to live, but he still ends up involved with both the Port Mafia and the ADA. Also, it's silly.

Complete | 3 Chapters

Rated - General Audiences

Be Good by orphan_account

Summary: It came out more or less by accident.

--------

“Are you okay, Ryuu?” Atsushi’s concerned voice finally broke the silence that had descended on the table.

“Oh I think Ryuu is much better than okay,” Dazai answered for him, glancing at Atsushi out of the corner of his eye before returning his attention to the man in front of him. “Could it be that our little Ryuunosuke likes it when we tell him just how good he is?”

{One Shot}

Rated - Explicit

Pet-a-cat, pet-a-cat, mafia man by amythecinnabunny

Summary: Nakajima Atsushi has this nifty little trick where he turns into a cat to offer comfort to people. Somehow, it leads to dating Nakahara Chuuya — after an accidental Italian vacation, that is.

{One Shot}

Rated - General Audiences

Hidden Colors by we_burnin_shit_yo

Summary: Atsushi brings in a pouch of fingernail polishes and Chuuya proceeds to do their nails while Dazai and Akutagawa hang out in the kitchen for food before joining their boyfriends which results in a fluffy polysoukoku evening.

{One Shot}

Rated - n/a

Dazai x Chuuya

Of Pinot and Patience by ChaoticQuill

Summary: In the morning hours after a night with Dazai, Chuuya finds himself addled by doubts that he'll be left behind again. Dazai, in an uncharacteristic move, offers to be patient.

— — —

Or: Chuuya worries Dazai is going to leave him, and they decide not to have sex again until Chuuya has overcome those doubts. Hilarity ensues.

{One Shot}

Rated - Explicit

[inamagicalhallucination]

i love this so much

becuz on one hand it looks like atsushi is the light breaking apart the otherwise darkness oozing out of akutagawa

like we all know akutagawa's design is super sexy becuz he was specifically designed to blend into the dark - becuz he's a character so much surrounded by darkness (it's why his little bug eyes dont have any light in them) but here, he's not completely dark, becuz look, atsushi is coming in w/ the contrast

and atsushi in general serves as a figure of light for akutagawa not becuz he can "use" atsushi to prove himself to dazai, like akutagawa initially thought - but simply becuz atsushi has become something for akutagawa, whether he'll admit to it or not

not even from a shipping lens - atsushi is just something to akutagawa - something worth dying for

this pic is also similar to how he stops being an all encompassing drenched in darkness figure when he gives rashomon to atsushi

look at how they switch

/

and on the other hand it looks like akutagawa is the force protecting atsushi and his light (becuz the coat melts into the ground)

now we know atsushi isn't a fully white/light character becuz no one is realistically all good or all bad (also if we're looking at it through just chracter design, then the character who pops up in my head as predominantly colored white is shibusawa and he's a piece of shit)

anyway

atsushi is relatively balanced (not developed fully into what all the characters are reaching for - a balance of their "good" and "bad" sides becuz we all know atsushi still has a way to go) but atsushi is a character who aims to do the "right" thing (though occasionally for selfish reasons) and often times becomes the "light" figure for other characters (kyouka for example) but he himself is held back becuz of his past and his inability to move on (i dont blame him tho becuz his "past" was like a few months ago for him lmao)

atsushi needs to make peace and understand his own "dark" side before he can ever develop

when atsushi wears rashomon

he becomes a predominantly, in terms of design, dark/black character - which i think is on purpose becuz one thing akutagawa gives him is assurance that the past is just the past (in his own mean akutagawa way) and atsushi isn't really a character who we see deal with his past (king of trauma dumping but never actually talking about his past)

of course this is the edited version from the @akutagawa-daily account but the og pic

is still like that

i feel like i could add something about dazai being there but it might be a reach so

sorry this is ramble-y and doesn't make sense but i had to get it off my chest

maybe one day i'll rewrite this in a way where you can tell what im saying (i will not)

saying dark side so many times made me feel like a 2012 emo kid aslfkdjf

[the-port-mafia]

My Dazatsu Week entries. I had hoped to do at least 4, but ended up doing 12😳 It was a lot of fun😆

Day 1 - Coffee shop/Soulmate AU bounded by destiny Dazai’s eyes widened in surprise. “I never expected to meet you.” The majority of people never got to meet their soulmate. It was a rare occurrence that only a select few ever got to experience.

Day 2 - Band AU Best Kept Secret Dazai leaned over the couch and read one of the tweets and grinned, “Atsushi’s partner must be amazing! #couplegoals”

Atsushi nearly leapt off his seat from fright. He hadn't heard his boyfriend come home. "Osamu, you nearly gave me a heart attack.”

Dazai kissed Atsushi’s cheek and climbed over the couch to cuddle up beside him. “Our fans would be the only ones having a heart attack if they knew the truth. Like, look at the username of that account - 'ihatedazai'. They wrote, ‘It's obvious, whoever it is, they're the best person for Atsushi. They make him incredibly happy!' If only they knew it was me.”

Day 2 - holding hands we're not like that "How long have you been dating Atsushi?" Chuuya questioned.

Dazai nearly tripped over his own feet at the question. “What?! I’m not dating Atsushi-kun.” He hoped the blush wasn't noticeable on his face.

Day 3 - Sunset It Began at Sunset Dazai had become pretty distant from Atsushi, so when he receives a message from his boyfriend saying 'they needed to talk,' of course he's going to think the worst.

Day 3 - High School AU Gossip "Why would Dazai-sensei date someone like Nakajima-sensei?”

“Akutagawa-senpei, you've got to have noticed the way Dazai-sensei looks at him.” Higuchi happily sighed. She wanted a relationship where someone would gaze at her with even half of the admiration Dazai had when he looked at Nakajima.

“Tch, if anyone is sneaking looks, it's Nakajima-sensei.” Akutagawa didn't understand why most of the students were so invested in finding out if Dazai and Nakajima were dating.

Day 3 - Amnesia I want this life Dazai ran his hand through his hair but stopped when he felt something cool on his finger. Dazai's eyes widened in disbelief when he saw a gold band on his ring finger. It couldn't possibly be a wedding ring? Was Ranpo pranking him? Was he still annoyed with Dazai for stealing one of his snacks, and was this his little act of revenge?

Day 4 - sic fic Fever Confession When Dazai calls in sick, Kunikida sends Atsushi to check in on him. Day 5 - Beast AU future is bright Since Dazai triggered the singularity that connected him to the other universe, he's been having a difficult time thinking about anything else. Being able to read the memories of the other Dazai and seeing how happy Atsushi was in that world made his heart ache. Dazai had never seen his Atsushi's smile shine so brightly before, as he did in the memories of the other Dazai. Day 6 - Reunion Deal Breaker Atsushi had never felt so nervous as he stood in front of his new boss, Mori Ougai. When he first heard that a member of the agency had to transfer to the Port Mafia, he could hardly believe it, and he would never forget the silence of the agency when Fukuzawa announced Mori had chosen him. Day 6 - Reunion give me a sign “I don’t know how I can keep doing this, Dazai-san.” Atsushi buried his face in his hands. “I'm trying to be strong and hold on to hope, but I've heard nothing.”

“If I just knew if you were alive…” It would give Atsushi the strength to keep going.

Day 7 - Post Canon I will tell you as many times as it takes for you to believe it “Just tell him.” Ranpo commented as he skimmed through a report.

“I can’t do that, Ranpo-san.” Dazai mumbled.

Ranpo rolled his eyes and put aside the report he was reading. “And why not?”

“Atsushi-kun doesn’t like me in that way.” Day 7 - Free Day Isn't he pretty? “Dazai! That’s the boss of the Port Mafia.” Kunikida whispered harshly.

“But more importantly, he’s my boyfriend.” Dazai beamed. “Isn’t he pretty?”

[seaskate]

I know that it's been theorized who from the ada is going to the PM because of the deal and everyone has been drawing parallels and ideas on who it could be, but one thing that I dont see may people looking at is behavior.

Personally I think that it will be Dazai that will go, he's the logical choice and would act as the best bridge between the ada and the pm, especially since Kunikida was named to become the next president and Dazai is his partner, so if Dazai were to go back and become boss at some point then that relationship is already there and is better than Mori's and Fukuzawa's from the start.

There has been a lot of points made about Dazai not being with the Agency when they are all gathered together (like that one manga panel or the party after the Guild or Kyouka's party) and how he appears more with or parallels Mori more in the intro than before (all of which is true) but we dont talk enough about how his behavior had been changing since episode one.

Dazai in episode one was only serious for maybe a small handful of seconds of screentime during the tiger debacle in the warehouse, when no one else was around to see. We can easily assume that home acting like a class clown happened more often than not from the way that he acts in the series. However, ever since the introduction of Atsushi and the Port Mafai in the series, Dazai has been slowly acting more serious than before.

In the first season alone, He sets it up so that the Azure Poet is killed and doesnt show any emotion when Kunikida tells at him for it. He bugs Higuchi and listens in on her and then basically goads Akutagawa into declaring war. Small instances, but close together.

When the Guild came there were more. There was the Q incident at the train where he all but threatened to kill the child and then slapped Atsushi out of a panic attack (which pain is actually one of the easier ways to remove someone from a panic attack, which is why people often dig in their nails or snap bands at their wrist when they feel one coming, but that's another argument to be had) which was effective but anyone else in the ada would have attempted another method. There was the Moby Dick and how he acted with Akutagawa there. And the meeting between the Ada and the pm where Dazai talked about war strategy. He blew up Lovecraft and allowd Chuuya to kill countless Guild hired guns when they ambushed him during that same instance.

None of those actions were things that someone at the ada likely would have done before the current arc. But now Dazai is continually acting in such away more often. Acting less like a detective and more like a mafioso.

He's relying on the mafia more often too.

Dazai had gone two years without any mafia contact while at the Agency, but now he's going to art museums with Hirostu and met with Akutagawa in the woods. That's not counting Chuuya and how they have worked together three times now in as many months, if you count Dead Apple, this current time in which Mori even helped with the fake vampire teeth. Not only that, but Dazai still calls Chuuya his partner. Not former partner, current.

Dazai dances on a fine line between good and evil, even as he believes in neither, but if it means that he could save those that he’s come to care for then he doesn’t hesitate to cross it (murder isn’t exactly condoned at the Agency, yet that’s exactly what he did to Fyodor - I know that he came back, but still - and has set up for Chuuya to do to those that had stood in their way since reuniting. Like the prison guards). Mori - who still has the executive seat waiting for Dazai to reclaim it, and had told Oda four years ago that Dazai would likely be boss in a few years time - knows this.

Yosano thought that this deal was a ploy for Mori to get her back, but she wasn’t the only child that he lost to the Agency. If we adds this to the paraless in the opening that exist and the fact that Dazai had been acting more and more like the Demon Prodigy with each season, Chuuya, and his place as an executive, it wouldn’t be surprising if he was the one chosen.

[skkfujoshi]

Until the night falls we’re aligned

“I thought you were dead.” “My death was greatly exaggerated.”Chuuya replied,seating himself across from Fukuzawa 

It was a tad strange,Chuuya had to admit.In a lot of ways it felt like being in his father’s office as a child.The same judgmental look solely focused on him,the door closed if not locked making him feel like he could scream and nobody would hear.

But he was an adult now.An equal.He had nothing to worry about,nothing at all.Worst Fukuzawa could really do is refuse to help him.

Fukuzawa offered him some tea and Chuuya accepted it though he didn’t drink any of it.

“I’ll be blunt,Fukuzawa.You can drop the niceties.I know you still resent me for what I did back at the tunnels.I don’t expect forgiveness for that.”

The older man regarded him shrewdly for a moment,putting the teapot down.

“You’re a guest.Tea is the bare minimum for those as far as I’m concerned.Though,I’ll give you this,you’re more direct than your late father.In that spirit,allow me to be honest as well,Nakahara.I didn’t propose this alliance. I wouldn’t have even so much as considered it after your actions towards my staff.But…Atsushi suggested it.And we both know just how unkind your organization has been to him.”

Chuuya was honestly gobsmacked.Either Atsushi was the dumbest or the smartest person alive.Or,considering his mentor,just crazy.

“Surprised?” “Certainly.After everything we did,you’d think he’d want our destruction more than anything.” “He’s a good man,perhaps in his hope and optimism,wiser than us both.And it is his experience that convinced me to offer this olive branch.Those are my reasons,but what are yours?”

Chuuya took a deep breath.

“I suppose it’s rather simple at the end of the day,Fukuzawa.I care about this city and my subordinates.Just like you.Sure,I can free Yumeno on my own but taking care of the Guild by myself is…Risky with my ability.I can’t afford to endanger him like that.He’s already been trough hell,I can’t risk putting him trough another lifetime of it.”he confessed 

Fukuzawa’s expression could only be described as immovable as he let Chuuya go on.

“And I’m sure you’ve become acquainted with Kōyo’s affection for Kyouka.If we’re allied,I can avoid breaking her heart by…” “Killing the girl.” “Punishing her treason.”Chuuya amended “She wasn’t in the dark about what would happen to her if she left and refused to come back.If I hadn’t altered the rules,she would’ve been killed by Akutagawa that day.”

Fukuzawa nodded though more in acknowledgement than approval.

“Pretty words are all well and good,boss,but they prove nothing.You can plead with me all you want,but you’ve put nothing on the line and you’ve offered me nothing in turn.” “I’d disagree.I have put quite a bit on the line here…Tell me,president,why do you suppose I stayed dead all this time?”

At that,the door swung open.

“Ooh,ooh I know the answer to that one!To spite me!”Dazai exclaimed excitedly 

Chuuya and Fukuzawa both blinked at him,disbelieving the audacity they were seeing.At least,Chuuya assumed they were on the same page about that.

“President,Mr Nakahara, I’m so sorry,I tried to stop him,but…You know how he is…”Kunikida muttered from a few paces behind

Sighing,Fukuzawa gestured for them to come in,much to Chuuya’s chagrin.

“It’s fine and…Kunikida what is that?”he asked,pointing at the small object pinched between Kunikida’s fingers

Before he could explain,Chuuya plucked it,sliding it across Fukuzawa’s desk.

“A flash drive with info on the Guild.I wrote some down when we made our initial deal with them.It’s not a lot,I admit but…I think you can take all you can get.” “And you just conveniently forgot to bring it with?”Dazai asked “Things happen.”

Chuuya shrugged,turning back to Fukuzawa

“Bring the world’s best detective to see if it all tracks and if it doesn’t you can have Kunikida here shoot me on the spot.”Chuuya said quickly before Dazai could get Fukuzawa’s ear again

A bit of a desperate play,it seemed,but he could hardly be blamed.Between him and Dazai the answer to who they were gonna believe was a no brainer,even though Chuuya was telling the truth about the drive’s contents.

The three exchanged looks,before Fukuzawa gave Kunikida a quick nod,after which he left and closed the door.

“Is Ranpo stuck on a train again?”Dazai asked “No.But he wanted to pick out some new candy so I sent Kunikida to escort him.”

Chuuya tried not to focus on the way their hands were tapping the desk,though he supposed it didn’t matter since they obviously knew he could hear them.And Dazai knew he could understand Morse code.

The message was clear.They weren’t gonna send Ranpo in to check the info.Fukuzawa believed him.

Chuuya 1

Dazai 0

Get shat on,waste of bandages!

“Anyway,Nakahara,as you were saying?” “Right.So,once I ‘died’,rival gangs got a lot more daring.Go figure,a nobody as the boss of the Port Mafia is a lot more of a tempting target than the previous boss’s son.”

Fukuzawa nodded,stroking his jaw .As a former assassin the appeal was probably quite clear to him.

“Inexperienced,statistically unlikely to have an ability,probably cocky…Weak link.” “Exactly.It gave me an element of surprise,but now…Since I let the info out in front of most of your employees,I’m technically at your mercy aren’t I?”

That earned him a tilt of the head from Fukuzawa and a couple bewildered blinks from Dazai.

“Well,Dazai still has my death certificate.From what I’ve been told ten minutes is not nearly enough time to give out one of those.” “Certainly suspect.”Fukuzawa agreed

Unfortunately the comment about Dazai having the certificate seemed to slide off with not as much as a glance at the man in question.

Well…Undermining Dazai was a bust…Still,the brunette was a creature of habit and if Chuuya knew Dazai’s interrogation techniques and know them he did…

“Not to mention he has Kōyo’s interrogation most likely taped somewhere and you still have the tunnel footage where I was clearly using ‘Upon the Tainted Sorrow’.Throw that into the wild and my enemies will know exactly what to do so they can play me like a fiddle.”

-

“And from what history would they draw your weaknesses,boss?Surely such a smart man would never be so transparent .”Dazai said,voice drowning in sarcasm

Even though his nails were right at his mouth,teeth ready to bite down any moment.

A part of him was genuinely impressed,proud in a strange way.Turning what was by all means a blunder every which way into a genuinely good bargaining chip was nothing short of genius.

But the other,more rational and smarter part of him felt a curling dread at the bottom of his stomach.

“How very Mori-esque of our hatrack…”it remarked with a nervous laugh

Chuuya scoffed at Dazai’s ‘compliment’.

“Wouldn’t you know Dazai-san?You were there,after all.And you know full well younger me wasn’t nearly as good at hiding those.”he said turning to him

The expression could barely be called that.It betrayed nothing,at least as far Chuuya’s mouth went.His eyes though…His left was twitching,just a little,just a tad.Cold ,hard hatred to be more direct.Chuuya might as well have said”Bet you know all about why I started though,right,’Zai?”with how clearly it was written across his face.

“Dazai,Chuuya,do you consider yourselves clever?”Fukuzawa asked

The two turned to him.

Chuuya blinked at him dumbly,sheeplike in how blank and confused his face went in the moment.

Even more dumbly somehow,Dazai could only say “Huh?!”in response 

“Did you not hear me?” “No,we did.I mean,I did at least.But…What does that have to do with anything?” “What the mutt said.” “Why you-“ “Do you or do you not?”Fukuzawa asked again

It wasn’t a demand in the guise of a question and there was no sharpness to it,like Mori’s probings had been.Which made it that much more impressive that the question got Chuuya’s attention.Dazai was a little in awe,truth be told.

He nodded firmly and quickly .Chuuya tossed him a glare but Dazai chose to ignore it.At the end of the day,they both knew it wasn’t out of ego.He was the youngest executive for a reason and it sure as hell wasn’t his looks.

Chuuya nodded too,though it took him a bit of a moment to do so.Dazai hummed in acknowledgement.Seems he wasn’t completely up his own ass yet,despite all appearances to the contrary.

“I see.Do you think yourselves cleverer than me?”

Dazai was taken aback for a moment.Then he quickly fell in step with Chuuya,assuring Fukuzawa that no,of course not.

“Then I advise you to stop trying to bite of more than you can chew,Double Black.”

-

If Dazai looked like he had swallowed a fly at that,Chuuya felt like he was swallowing an entire swarm of them.

How the hell?!Dazai’s documents were good as gone!Chuuya knew,he fucking checked himself!

Which meant…Fukuzawa knew everything.And Chuuya had tried to dig Dazai’s past up right in front of the man’s nose.He probably looked underhanded and suspicious as hell now…

Shit,shit,shit…

He fucked up.He fucked up and now he’ll have to use corruption on his own and hope to God that whatever Lovecraft was couldn’t withstand it.

And if it did,Yumeno was as good as dead.Sure…Chuuya could try a second time but his body could only handle so much.

He ran his hand over his face,completely defeated.

“Where did I fuck up?”he asked weakly,hoping Fukuzawa actually didn’t hear the question  “You have a terrible poker face for starters.Not that I think you were lying,but you came off as a little desperate.Trying to air out Dazai’s secrets certainly wasn’t helping your case.All I can really say about that is that you should do better research.”Fukuzawa said

Why did Chuuya even  try?This men could read Mori like a damn book.Who did he think he was fooling?

“Not to mention I kept a close eye on your father’s escapades since we seperated.Even if most of that info scattered to the wind now,likelihood is I heard of it when it first sprung up.”

So he was doomed from the start…Great.

“However…” “However?”him and Dazai asked “Despite the clumsiness of your execution,I can recognize a genuine cry for help when I see it.Consider us at your disposal,boss.”

Chuuya blinked at him for a couple of moments,shocked.He squinted at Fukuzawa,looking hard for any sign of a trick or deception,but found none.

It wasn’t often that Chuuya felt blessed by the universe.Hell,it was rare that he felt anything but despised by it.

But if this was a blessing,Chuuya would spend every damn day thanking whatever deity or force brought it to him on his hands and knees.

-

“Thank you,Fukuzawa.Thank you so much.”Chuuya said

Dazai could only stand there,disbelieving.Chuuya was beaming and it was genuine.

Was he hallucinating?Had he finally cracked after 22 years? “Dazai?Are you listening?” “Sorry,president,think I missed that.Could you say it again?” “You’ll be helping Nakahara retrieve his subordinate from the Guild.Tonight.”

Previous fic part <—- Next fic part —->

First overall AU info post

[poe-tat]

THE DEAL FROM CANNIBALISM??

Y'know that one deal where the ADA gives one of its members to the PM?!

anywho this is what I think the options are and their outcomes!

Atsushi;

So basically he does the same thing he did with SKK to Atsushi and Akutagawa

Mori: So Kouyou... Atsushi and Akutagawa.. Kouyou: NO NO NO NOT THIS AGAIN

Junichiro;

Mori would see how great his ability is for assassination, so he keeps giving him those kinds of missions and he doesn't mind it much

Ranpo;

instead of describing let me "describe"

Ranpo: listen i would listen to you that they did x,y,z but you clearly didn't know about a,b,c so why should I help you exactly? Random member: uhhhhh

Dazai;

Honestly, Dazai did it himself why? he'd rather see himself where he doesn't want to be than anyone in the ADA change my mind but anyhow he just takes the time out of his day to bother and annoy Chuuya since there is no Kunnikida

Dazai: HEEYYYY Chuuuyaaa! Chuuya: If it's another one of your terrible "facts" I don't want to hear it Dazai: Oh No! not that you stopped falling for them I have seen anyway I was going to say you have a nice outfit today Chuuya: *Taking him seriously now and looking in a mirror* Oh Really? Dazai: Yea no Chuuya: I'M GONNA KILL YOU

That's it

If you're wondering about Yosano, Kenji, or Kunikida I genuinely think that Fukazawa made it clear to Mori that those three in particular is off-limits

[falloutjuli]

I kinda went nuts and casually made this 5k words. OOP- Anyways, stan Mochi, I love him already.

If anyone wants another continuation, be sure to let me know, Im always down to write more cute domestic fluff with your gravity man.

----------------

Chuuya Nakahara x Reader - Domestic Adventures part 2 (First part;♥️) Wordcount: 5,2k Short summary: Their little family gets a new addition in the form of a dog. With that also comes letting their closest friends and family (pretty much only Chuuyas side) know just how serious they are. Warnings: NONE - Y/N used - Reader gets caught lying, Chuuya being a cutie, author is invested in Mochi, Akutagawa being an awkward mess, DAZAI

-----------------

"But Chuuya, let me repeat your point yeah?" He nodded, taking a sip of his wine, his thumb caressing the back of your hand.

"You think it's a good idea to get a dog that can protect me while I'm out with them yeah?" He nodded again, trying to find your problem.

"And the first breed you name me is a Chihuahua?" Chuuya shrugged, still struggling to see the problem.

"Chuu, no one is afraid of a Chihuahua. They are like... tiny as Fuck. No person who intends to harm me is gonna see that miniscule thing and go 'yeah I won't fuck with them, they got a Chihuahua '."

"Fine, then what about a Maltese?" You stared at him with a raised eyebrow. Meanwhile Chuuya didn't get you. Why not get one of those?; you should like them since they are cute and small like hi- He stopped immediately and cursed internally for having thought that.

"Then what's your idea?" With a huge smile you got up to get your phone.

Getting a dog has so far not been the fairy tale that the movies had sold to Chuuya.

No picking up a stray dog with huge innocent eyes who will love you eternally.

No, the time he had found one it tried to bite him when he approached. In the shelters you haven't found the perfect one either. Either they needed more care and attention that you could plan for or the vibe simply didn't match. So now you were going through listings, in the hopes of finding a puppy you both like.

"Okay sooo… I have found this listing online from a little family whose dog recently had a few puppies, and after I have seen the pictures, I have been thinking about them." You passed Chuuya your phone, watching his reaction carefully as he took in the listing.

You watched his content expression become bewildered, as he scrolled through the pictures. "Those are German shepherds." He stated and you nodded excitedly.

"Yes, I know. And they are so adorable. Don't you think?"

Chuuya didn't know what to think. Sure, these were cute, fluffy looking pups but they'd grow. A lot. And he was unsure of that. In his mind he had always pictured having a dog that’s more... compact.

And while that was his preference, he knew he can't deny you. You'd just need to insist on one of these and he'd get it. He cursed that you had him in your hand.

As you noticed his hesitation, you sat down next to him, laying your head on his shoulder, watching as he took in the pictures. "We don't have to get one of these. It's just... if we get a dog, I want one like that, or a golden retriever, something like that you know?"

Hugging him sideways, carefully aware of his wineglass you gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "But like I said, if you don't want to, we won't get one like this. We can always wait."

"No doll, you like these." You rolled your eyes.

"Chuuya, it's our dog. We both make the call and won't decide alone. But if you're worried about them being too big, it says down here, that there's a bit of corgi in here, so they stay rather small." "Really?" Orange eyebrows furrowed as Chuuya read the text.

"We could always ask to see them in person and see if they fit us." You said, a finger trailing over his leg. "Alright. Sounds like a deal. You make the date and I make sure I'll be there alright?" The smile you now wore made Chuuya feel warm.

---

Barely a week passed before you sat in your car, Chuuya in the passenger seat, currently trying to squeeze into a parking spot near the family’s home.

"I can't believe you manage to fit that." Chuuya stated once he saw how insanely tight the space had been that now your car stood in. "I'm the majesty of parking spaces, now come on, I wanna pet some cute puppies!" You dragged him along, your eyes looking around as you compared the GPS map to your surroundings.

"This should be it!" You finally stated, opening the front gate to a tiny average looking house. Chuuya grew nervous a little. Which felt weird to him.

He was a Mafia executive for god's sake, and yet the thought of meeting his potential new family member had him wary.

"One second!" A woman called from the other side of the door, after you had rang the doorbell. Once opened the woman took both of you in.

"Sorry for the mess, a toddler and puppies are no easy task!" She said, as you both came in and for what she said, it looked rather clean even. "Follow me, they are currently outside, playing." She stated, guiding you and Chuuya to the backyard where a bunch of black and yellow furred puppies were running around, playing with toys.

Chuuya felt his heart swell immediately upon seeing all these cute little beings. He barely registered you and the mother talking. Only when your hand slipped in his, he was ripped out of his trance, focusing on you again.

"Soo.. let's play with them!" You said giddily and approached the tiny pups. The second your knees made contact with the grass you were swarmed by them, their paws all over your thighs, as they tried climbing onto you. You giggled, hands trying to pet and caress each and every one of them.

Good thing you wore some jeans that could be ruined, as you had expected something like this. When your quickly looked next to you, you saw that Chuuya barely got any attention from the puppies as they were busier trying to get to lick your hands.

Sensing how Chuuyas mood took a dip, you picked one puppy up and placed it closer to him, but the second Chuuya lifted his hand to pet it, it ran back to you.

Well... This was awkward.

"You can pick which one you like best." He just stated, trying his best to mask his disappointment. "No, Chuu, you know we both pick one."

He looked over to you, who was getting swarmed by the furry beasts, and he wondered just what it was about him that dogs didn't like... He knew dogs had a weird sixth sense, so perhaps it was something about him, like the whole Arahabaki thing that made them keep their distance.

A sigh escaped his lips, and you shot him a sympathetic smile. "We can always look for others." You stated trying to cheer him up. He nodded, once again trying to mask his true feelings, as to not upset you.

But just when he was getting up, one of the puppies ran up to him, nudging his hands.

Hesitantly and very slowly Chuuya moved his hand towards the little thing and eventually his gloved hand met the body of the pup. The soft fur tickled the skin the glove didn't cover and if Chuuya ignored all his feelings about you for just a second, this was the best feeling ever.

You watched him, biting your lip from how cute the scene looked, with your Mafia boyfriend almost crying from cuddling a puppy. He looked unlike himself, all soft and in disbelief of the situation.

"I think we made a choice." You whispered to the woman, who chuckled quietly and led out back towards the patio so you could talk.

While you discussed when the puppy could be picked up, which shots he had already gotten and anything else that could matter, Chuuya was busy playing with the soon to be new family member, finding immense joy in watching the little thing do the most mundane things.

He barely noticed time passing, until you cleared your throat behind him. Curiously he looked up from his sitting position and cocked an eyebrow.

"Chuu, it's time to go home. They'll be tired soon and we still have some cooking to do." "Oh yeah, of course." He quickly regained composure, getting up and dusting off his clothes.

He desperately tried to ignore the puppy that was nudging against his leg to continue playing. He coughed in his hand, shifting awkwardly.

---

"Thank you so much for your time. You have my number so if anything important comes up, don't hesitate to message me." You said and waved goodbye to the family and took Chuuyas hand to return to the car. Once in it and on the road, you got talking.

"We can pick him up in a month."

Chuuya needed a second to register what you meant. "We're gonna get him?"

"I mean, you were so in love with the little one, so I asked if someone wanted him specifically and now he's ours. He will get his remaining shots at the vet, and then we can pick him up in a month."

Chuuya was silent. Oddly so.

"Chuuya?"

"I love you so much."

You chuckled, caressing his thigh, as you kept your eyes on the road. "As do I. Any ideas for a name yet?" You asked but the ginger shook his head.

"No... I guess I have enough time to think about any ideas. Do you?"

This time you shook your head. "Nope. I'm sure a fitting name will come find us." You said, pulling into the garage of your shared home.

---

Time passed, but barely quick enough for Chuuya. Never in his life had a month felt as long. Not when he really wanted his dog but the most he got was pictures you showed him after work that you got from the very kind owners.

He had already ordered all kinds of pet stuff you could need in an effort to keep his mind off the excruciating long time, but it only made it worse. Now there was pet stuff everywhere in the apartment, and no dog to show. Damn his overexcitement.

A knock on his office door interrupted him from his workflow. Fortunately, it wasn't a subordinate coming with bad news or anything, it was Kouyou, carrying a little gift box.

"Ane-san, how are you, do you need anything?" He asked, setting his papers aside. Kouyou took seat in front of his desk, putting the pink box with white ribbon on top on it.

"I was out shopping the other day and I bought some sweets for you and your partner. Who I still haven't met by the way."

Ah yes, the god ol' passive aggressive way of Kouyou saying "When am I going to meet them?"

"Come on, it's not that serious or deep." Chuuya tried to downplay, but this was still Kouyou he was talking to, so with a smirk she replied; "Ah yes, your totally not serious partner that moved in with you and are now adopting a dog with. At least invite me to the wedding when the time comes.”

Chuuya rolled his eyes. There was no hiding the truth from Kouyou, especially not between the two of them.

"I'd get not letting them meet the Akutagawas, Mori or Kajii, but me? Didn't I raise you better than that?" She said with a dramatic sigh at the end, further lamenting the feeling of being left out.

"You know they are a regular person, so I'd prefer to keep ‘em far away from any of this. But maybe, someday, I'll invite you to dinner. And you know if I were to get married, you'd get the important roles anyway."

With a smile, she got up. "That's all I wanted. I just hope you're happy Chuuya. I'll leave you to it then."

She left his office, only the package left on his desk from her.

---

"From your big sister?" You questioned as Chuuya put the box in your hands while he hung up his coat. "She's not my actual sister. Her names Kouyou and she's reeeal curious about you."

You smile awkwardly, before you set the box on the kitchen island and drag him towards your room. "Sounds interesting. You'll have to tell me more later, because for now, I have a surprise for you!"

Chuuya raises a curious eyebrow and watches you open the door, only to see a puppy running out, that's now circling his legs.

Amazed he bends down to get rid of his gloves, his hands brushing through the soft fur. "B-But...how? It hasn't been a whole month just yet?" He asks, voice an octave higher.

"I was surprised too. He got his last vet exam yesterday and I was asked if we're already ready to pick him up. I said yeah, and came to get him today. We're just... Lacking a name still."

Chuuya didn't care about all that right now. He was too busy enjoying being an official pet owner now, engraving the feeling of soft fur and a tiny tongue licking his hands in his brain for all eternity.

He felt like he could combust from happiness in this moment, from just how perfect his life seemed right now. A loving partner, his lifelong dream of a dog being fulfilled.

"Mochi." You stated, ripping through Chuuyas mind.

"Huh?"

"Your sister got us mochi." You repeated, holding up one of the treats from the box. Looking down at the pup, Chuuya smiled.

"Why don't we call him that?"

"Mochi?"

"Yeah? He sure is sweet enough to be one." You smiled, watching Chuuya stroke the puppy that excitedly wiggled its tail.

"That's a cute idea. Mochi it is then." While munching on a mochi, you crouched down to Chuuya and placed on in his mouth too, his eyes not leaving the puppy. He chewed, smile ever present on his lips.

"I love him so much already." He stated, mouth still full. Once he had finally swallowed, his turned his attention from Mochi to you, kissing you all over you face in pure excitement.

He called in sick the next day just so he could play with Mochi all day, making you chuckle as you listened to the worst fake cough ever as he phoned around.

---

Falling into the new routine was easy even. Mochi would be walked to his dogsitter (who Chuuya had thoroughly vetted before he even got to meet Mochi) by you on your way to your job.

After your shift you come pick him up, walk a detour through the park, get home, start dinner as you both wait for Chuuya to come home.

At the weekend Mochi goes to a dog trainer for a few hours for his behavior and to learn new tricks and otherwise spends the days with you, whatever you decide to do.

Chuuya had been right about a dog helping your when he was away. During a particularly long mission of 3 weeks in Europe, Mochi had kept you busy and happy.

"Sorry that it's taking so long doll. This stupid asshole I'm here for is really testing my patience." He stated and looked outside at the rainy streets on London at night.

One the other end of the speaker your sleepy voice rang through his ears. "It's alright. It’s what I signed up for when I said yes to dating you. Take your time and get that punk. I have Mochi to keep me company." As the mention of the name, the dog let out a quiet whine, but Chuuya still heard it.

"I miss both of you. I’m hoping you’re not letting him stay in the bed." Despite spoiling Mochi to no end, like all the steaks he kept buying just for him, he was adamant about the bed being a dog free zone. "He has an almost 55k yen pet bed in baroque style, no need to have him in our bed too." He had said.

"Oh yeah I'd never do that." You said while Mochi laid happily on Chuuyas side of the bed.

"Good. I'll see you soon."

You didn't know how soon, because Chuuya went well past the initial return date and was unable to update you. It was alright for you, after all it wasn't his fault, and you knew he didn't have much choice in the matter at all.

On a lazy Sunday morning, you still tucked into your warm blanket, one arm draped over Mochi as he curled against you on the bed, the apartment door opened very, very quietly.

Having picked up on it, Mochi left the bed, making your stir awake. Your half-asleep brain was ready to get back into dreaming about being stuck in a candy maze, when the weight on the bed shifted behind you and you were pulled against a chest.

"Good morning." He whispered, against the skin of your neck before he pressed soft kisses anywhere, he could reach. You let him, before you rolled on your back, your hands finding his neck to pull him down into a real sloppy but passionate kiss.

"You're back." You mumbled tiredly and pressed your face against his shoulder while you cuddled with him. "Yes. Finally got that fucker and took the first flight back. Sorry it's been so long."

"You're forgiven." Another kiss was shared. "I'd say you too, but not when you lied to me that Mochi wasn't in the bed." You groaned, of course he had you figured out.

The next day Chuuya for once had off while you had to come into work. It was a rare occurrence, since normally Chuuya worked a lot more, but Mori had been kind enough to give him an addition day to settle back in before returning to his duties the next day.

With him at home, Mochi got to stay home too, and Chuuya took full advantage of it. Cuddling, playing, bathing, brushing his fur, Mochi was getting spoiled rotten by his ginger owner, who was just excited to finally be back with his family.

---

"What. Is. That." Akutagawa asked as he, Higuchi and the Black Lizards stepped into his office to be briefed on their mission. Mochi laid on a pet bed, tail wagging in excitement at the sight of new people.

"That's my dog, Mochi. Dogsitter called in sick and my partner can't take him with them to work so he came with me." Chuuya said and watched as Gin, Tachihara and Higuchi all crouch down to pet the good boy.

Hirotsu retained his composure, though Chuuya did seem him sneaking glances with a smile on his lips, while Akutagawa kept trying to shift subtlety as far away as possible.

"He doesn't bite, ya know." Chuuya said and was met with an accusatory stare from the boy in the long coat.

"And?" Was the simple statement and Chuuya let him, knowing fully well that due to his upbringing Akutagawa was no big fan of dogs. Why he then became the dog of the Port Mafia is an irony beyond Chuuyas understanding.

Higuchi, Gin and Tachihara keep on petting, cooing, and talking to Mochi while Chuuya shared the briefings with the two guys who weren't charmed by Mochi.

"A simple thing really, Mori and I just thought it'd be better to send all of you in case of having to detain more people than accounted for or unpleasant surprises." He stated as Hirotsu and Akutagawa quickly read through the notes.

The cooing and happy whines of Mochi behind them were a little distracting but when Chuuya cleared his throat, all other three mafiosi were back in line next to Akutagawa and Hirotsu.

"Be thorough, don't fuck shit up and keep collateral to a minimum, alright?" All of them nodded and went on their way to the mission, with all of them but Akutagawa stealing a quick glance at Mochi one last time.

When his office door closed, Chuuya himself was immediately crouched down by him, petting, and cooing at him. "You’re being so good today. I'll get you steak for lunch, just don't tell Y/N!"

It was late when Akutagawa returned to the office to hand in his first draft of a report.

Chuuya was just starting to pack things up, as the younger one entered, standing at the side of the table that was furthest away from the dog, who only spared Akutagawa a tried glance and a yawn.

Upon seeing the bared teeth Akutagawa became even stiffer, however that was possible. "Thank you, my boy. I'll read it at home if that's alright with you."

"Of course. I only wanted to drop it off, since I had it done anyways, and the light was still on here." He coughed in his hand, promoting Mochi to get up and get closer, which then in return made Akutagawa take a few steps away again.

"He's not gonna bite you, don't worry. He's a real good boy." Chuuya said held onto Akutagawa’s shoulders to push him towards Mochi again.

The younger one became as stiff as a board as Chuuya carefully guided his hand to the top of Mochis head. “See, aint that bad right?” Awkwardly Akutagawa nodded, mentally he was using Rashomon to climb to the ceiling to get away from this.

Letting go of the hand, Akutagawa kept it still, with Mochi turning, sniffing and then licking his hand, making the man scowl. “Ew.” He stated and Chuuya laughed.

“Come on then let’s get home, want me to give you a ride Akutagawa?”

“Im fine. I have more work to attend to anyways. But thank you for your time and thank you for…” Akutagawa stared down at Mochi, before he continued, “Whatever it is you do. But don’t just lick people.”

With that he turned on his heel and left, leaving Chuuya chuckling.

---

Atsushi Always liked autumn. The way the leaves change, and orange painted skies when the sun began setting was a view to behold, especially when walking home with his mentor after a good day at the ADA, through the park of Yokohama.

Dazai was currently talking about how the waitress down at the cafe was still refusing his advances, even when his most recent love letter (aka a poorly disguised plea to commit a lover’s suicide) had apparently been his Magnum opus.

The constant playful whining stopped abruptly and when Atsushi looked at Dazai, he felt fear. The grin, the glee in his eyes, it couldn't mean anything good. And when followed his line of sight, Atsushi dreaded his existence.

Why did Port Mafia Executive, Chuuya Nakahara, also known as Dazais former Partner have to sit in this park on a bench. For Dazai this was an invitation, one he would never turn down.

"Atsushi! Wanna see me annoy a hat rack?"

"I'd rather not-" But Dazai had already caught his wrist and dragged him along towards Chuuya, whos happy smile immediately dropped when he spotted Dazai.

Dazai kept smiling in this weird way that was sorely reserved for when he messed with his ex-partner, as he saw what Chuuya was looking at. A couple of Dogs and their owners playing fetch and alike.

"Looking at things you can't have? Is that Chuuyas new hobby?" Dazai asked and Atsushi took a few cautious steps away, in the hopes of not getting on Chuuyas bad side by distancing himself.

"Now I know why it reeks of rotten fish suddenly. The bandage wasting Mackerel is here." Chuuya didn't even look at Dazai, which only seemed to egg him on more.

"Ah don't be like that, you love me slug. I know you do."

There had been a few instances in which Atsushi wished to be swallowed whole to get out of uncomfortable situations, but anything that involved Dazai antagonizing the Port Mafia like it's his profession takes the top spot. The sheer awkwardness he feels whenever Dazai decides to meddle with everyone’s business makes him want to ditch country.

But he can't. So, he's stuck listening to the two riling each other up.

"I have you know I'm not stalking Chuuya. I have a job."

"You might have one, but I know you don't show up for it. And that Atsushi-kun does all your paperwork."

"That's quite accusatory of you Chibi! At least I could get a dog without being asked if I have my parents’ permission."

To both their surprises, Chuuya got up calmly, stared at Dazai with a blank face and used two fingers to whistle.

Both detectives raised an eyebrow and wondered what kind of ability related thing would hit them, but no such thing came true. No, instead a dog came running, nudging Chuuyas leg, who in return smiled smugly at Dazai and crossed his arms.

Ex demon prodigy, smug asshole, certified mummy cosplayer, Dazai Osamu meanwhile stepped behind Atsushi, making the young boy wonder if he was dreaming. Was his mentor, Dazai, the guy who was always scheming and playing mind games as a hobby, really cowering behind him because of a dog?

"What's that?"

"Are you blind now too? My dog obviously. Mochi, Mackerel and Atsushi, Atsushi and Mackerel, Mochi."

Atsushi, could help but aww at the animal, looking at Chuuya with big eyes, silently asking for permission. With a nod he was granted it, and Atsushi happily went to pet the good boy, who as always enjoyed extra attention.

"Aren't you a cutie?" Atsushi cooed and caressed the dog happily. He was aware that Dazai was still hiding behind him, eyeing the door cautiously.

"At a loss for words shit for brains?" Chuuya asked smugly, his delight ever so audible in each word.

"Chuu, is everything alright?" A person called out that came running. Atsushi hadn't seen them before.

They came to stand next to Chuuya and had a slightly annoyed expression upon seeing Dazai.

"Oh, Dazai." They said and Atsushi caught his mentor waving at them. Getting up from the crouched position, Atsushi got up to introduce himself, but Chuuya took care of that already.

"That's Nakajima Atsushi, the kid from the ADA." With a pleasant smile, the unknown person, offered Atsushi their hand.

" L/N Y/N, Chuuyas partner. It's a pleasure to meet you Nakajima-kun."

"Atsushi is just fine." He responded as they shook hands.

The Weretiger quickly took notice of all the details before him. The way Chuuya instinctively had an arm wrapped around their waist, pulling them close, the way Y/N scanned Chuuya looking if he was made uncomfortable by Dazai, Mochi circling his owners happily and nudging his head against their legs.

They looked lovely together, and by the ever so subtle, genuine smile Chuuya tried to hide, Atsushi could tell how happy he was.

"Y/N! You're here too, what a surprise." Dazai tried his usual cheery voice, but it was apparent that the dog still had him wary. It was amusing to see the usually composed Dazai be unnerved by a dog, the dog of his ex-partner no less.

"Well, as lovely as this sight of a scared mackerel is, we have plans. See you around Atsushi." Chuuya clicked a red leash onto Mochi's collar, and the two waved towards the detectives before making their way down the path.

It looked really cute and adorable in Atsushi’s opinion; they made a good couple.

Dazai, now finally composed again, also looked after them and there was something in his gaze that Atsushi couldn't name. It wasn't negative, despite what his fake disgusted expression was trying to sell.

"Why were you scared of a dog?"

Atsushi finally asked when they began walking towards the ADA dormitories again. "It's Chuuyas dog! Who knows if he trained it to bite me!"

"I don't think Chuuya-san would be that petty. Also why did Y/N-san also seem dislike you?"

"Curious aren't you, Atsushi?" Dazai hummed and Atsushi raised his hands in defense.

"I can't help it. It's simply..." Lacking the sought-after word, Atsushi trailed off. Dazai only chuckled as he crossed his arms behind his head, closing his eyes, like he was reminiscing a pleasant memory.

"I might have crashed a date of theirs back when they began dating. And since Chuuya doesn't like me, Y/N doesn't like me either! Which is tragic, such a beautiful person for a double suicide lost to a hat rack."

He really shouldn't have been surprised, this was very in character for Dazai, so Atsushi was glad that their conversation slowly faded away from the gravity manipulator and back towards Agency staff.

"You think Kunikida is home already?"

"No, why?"

"Wanna see me break into his home? His lock is so easy to pick."

"Dazai, NO!"

---

“Here.” You said as you passed Chuuya the wine glass you had just filled for him. Taking it from your hand, holding it at distance as he pulled you down into a chase kiss, he smiled. “Thank you doll.”

You squeezed his hand, before you went back to the kitchen island to keep preparing dinner.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to help?”

“No thank you. I wanted to try this recipe for quite a while now and you can just relax yeah?”

The TV was on, but Chuuya preferred to keep watching you from the corner of his eye, with Mochi cuddled up next to him. From across the room, he could listen to you cutting up vegetable and a faint humming.

Life was perfect, he couldn’t wish for anything more really. Not when he had already everything he could ask for.

As he absentmindedly petted Mochi, he kept swirling his wineglass in his other hand, with only a single thought echoing in his brain.

It didn't take long until the aroma of the simmering dinner filled the air and Chuuya couldn't help but reflect on the simplicity and warmth of the moment. The sound of your humming and the rhythmic chopping of vegetables created a soothing symphony that resonated with the love he felt for you.

Dinner was soon ready, and the two of you sat down at the table, sharing stories and laughter. The TV served as a background hum, but the real entertainment was the genuine connection between you and Chuuya.

As the evening unfolded, with plates emptied and wineglasses occasionally clinking in toasts, Chuuya found himself stealing glances at you. The soft glow of the lights illuminated your features, casting a warm, comforting ambiance over the room. Mochi, content and curled up nearby, added to the feeling of completeness.

After the last bites were savored and the dishes were cleared away, you found yourself in each other's arms on the couch. The day had transitioned seamlessly into a tranquil night, and Chuuya felt a profound sense of contentment.

"I'm glad we have this," he whispered, his fingers gently tracing patterns on your skin.

You looked up at him, your eyes reflecting the same sentiment. "Me too."

With a shared smile, you leaned in for a sweet, lingering kiss. The world outside seemed to fade away as you both embraced the simple joy of being together. As the night progressed, Chuuya held you close, the echoes of his earlier thought still resonating in his heart.

"I want to be with them forever," he mused silently, knowing that in moments like these, forever felt just right.

---

[sickficideas]

it's alright, it's okay || akutagawa siblings sickfic

ao3! 11.1k - please refer to the tags in the link for content + warnings!

16 May, 2012, 09:31am - Yokohama

"You look awful, Ryuunosuke."

She has a feeling that he's heard that a few times today, because all he does is sigh. She's waiting for him to protest that comment, he always does, but she has enough evidence to prove her point. He's unusually pale and she can tell he's dizzy just by looking at him. That red around his eyes is always either a sign that he's beyond exhausted, or he's starting a fever.

"Good morning, Gin," he opts for instead, despite sounding entirely annoyed. Gin decides she's not going to play this game and bother with pleasantries. She reaches up to lay a hand against his forehead, and before he swats it away, she gets enough proof to make her case.

"You're warm," she tells him.

"I'm fine. I haven't slept," he offers as an explanation as he starts to walk off towards the entrance to the subway station. That might be entirely true, but she thinks he doesn't realize that wouldn't necessarily cause him to look like this, with a fever on top of that.

Gin caught a glimpse of Higuchi when Ryuunosuke was first walking over, and she turns to wave her off, and the latter gives a meek wave in return. She probably had to deal with Ryuunosuke's attitude all morning. She feels sorry for her.

"Thank you," she mouths behind her hand, and she catches a smile from Higuchi before she turns around again.

"I hope you were nice to Higuchi," Gin says when she catches up to him. She notices the container in his hand. "What do you have there?"

"Tea," he answers simply.

"What kind?" she asks.

"Ginger," he says.

"Who made it?"

"Higuchi."

That tells her all she needs to know. Higuchi wouldn't make him something like that for no reason, she must be at least a little aware that he's ill, or not feeling well, at the very least.

"That was nice of her," Gin says. Higuchi is always that nice, no matter the occasion, whether he wants it or not.

"Mhm," he mumbles. "You're talkative today."

Gin huffs out of her nose. He’s not saying enough, but she won’t bother arguing with him. 

She takes Ryuunosuke's arm as they walk down. It's painfully obvious how dizzy he is and she really doesn't need him cracking his head open on the subway stairs, that's entirely inconvenient. "You should have taken the elevator."

"It's out of service," he tells her.

The line to their apartment is always quick to bring them a train, and this time she's especially thankful for it. She leads Ryuunosuke to one of the only open seats. He, of course, stares at her for a few moments, expecting her to take it, but she grabs his shoulder to push him into sitting down, leaving him without any choice.

She takes a bit of a defensive position in front of him as she takes hold of the pole right next to the seat they've found. It's just a few stops, thankfully.

Ryuunosuke looks tense. She's not entirely sure what happened. She knows he and Higuchi had to meet with Mori, but she doesn't know why, when, anything, and she doubts Ryuunosuke will tell her - but clearly, whatever happened there is still heavy on his mind. But at least, now, he's closed his eyes.

She wants to think of something that will help him relax, but with how unwell he's looking, she has a feeling she'll need to think of ways to prevent a worsening illness instead.

The train arrives and Gin quickly kneels down to take his arm to lead him through the doors, they're always so quick. This time, Gin really has to make an effort to keep him upright once they're on the platform, and she's really worried he's about to pass out. She stood him up too quickly.

"I'm okay," he assures her with a shake of his head in some attempt to get himself together, but she keeps their arms locked regardless. She knows at least that this station has a working elevator that they will be taking advantage of.

The elevator doors let them out on the street level, and they begin the short walk back to their apartment.

"Did your job go well?"

"It did," Gin tells him with a nod. It's not uncommon for things to go smoothly - she, Tachihara and Hirotsu make a good team. "Tachihara is out for four days, by the way."

"Is he now," he says, after a few faint coughs. Gin nods. Tachihara never elaborates on what he leaves for, but it’s at least once a month that he’s gone for something. "I suppose…the timing is good."

Gin has a feeling that means Ryuunosuke knows he won't be going back to work tomorrow, either.

There's a cat in front of their apartment that Gin always likes to stop and pet. It's a little thing that she looks forward to. Ryuunosuke doesn't usually engage. He pretends he's not a fan of cats, but she thinks he secretly is. Regardless of his feelings on the cat on any particular day, though, he usually waits for Gin. But today, he's unhooked Gin's arm and he's already headed up to their apartment without a word to her.

Gin stays for a while, regardless, just to give Ryuunosuke some silence for a few minutes. She's concerned about him being sick. It's never just a little cold or a headache, it's always a whole ordeal for him. He can never catch a break from it.

"What should I do with him, hm?" Gin asks the cat, who of course, gives her no good answer. He just purrs and presses against her hand for more pets, but before long, he's moved on to his spot on his doorstep in the sun.

Once she's back inside, she realizes this is where she's going to have to really take care of her brother. This is where he'll let his guard down enough for her to help him. She hangs her coat and keys by the door, takes off her shoes, and peers into the kitchen.

She sees him almost doubled over the sink. She sighs. That was inevitable, really. He's lucky he even made it this far, that willpower of his is something else, but as she gets closer, she realizes he hasn't actually thrown up. He's still breathing heavy like he's nauseous.

"You okay?" she asks gently as she walks over. Of course, he doesn't look okay at all. The arms holding him up over the sink might collapse on him at any moment, but even so, he nods. He could be on the brink of death and still be in denial.

"Okay, let's take this off," Gin says as she tugs on his coat. He doesn't look thrilled by the idea, but he's gotten better about letting his guard down in these kinds of situations over the last few months. He views himself as completely defenseless without long coats like this, and often he'll refuse to take it off even when they're at home. She turns him around and unzips it, pulling his arms out of the sleeves, and getting another feel at just how warm he is. She's worried he's going to turn into jello if he's standing any longer.

She takes his wrist to lead him to the bathroom, so she can at least wash his face for him. He often grumbles in protest about how he doesn't see the point in such things, but she knows how much it helps her after a long day, and insists on it anyway. She sits him down on the toilet lid and he rubs his eyes at the harsh bathroom lights, which she turns off for him, instead opting for the natural light coming in through the windows.

"I'll be right back. I'll get you a change of clothes."

And she does just that, finding a t-shirt and a light pair of sweatpants for him to wear. He's not going to like the t-shirt, but Gin won't let him walk around in a sweater with a fever, which she's sure he has.

She's done this countless times, ever since the first time he came home to their apartment with injuries so bad he couldn't brush his own hair. He knows by now that if she brings him to the bathroom, that she's going to help him whether or not he wants her to.

"Do you need help changing? I was thinking I could check if we have any medicine," Gin says when she places his change of clothes on the counter.

"I think I can do it," he says quietly, gingerly reaching for the clothes. He looks and sounds so tired. Gin won't keep him up, but she wants to at least help him wash up before he gets to bed.

Gin isn't sure they have much of anything, but she's concerned about his nausea. She needs to think of something to relieve him of that so that he can rest comfortably.

But of course, before she can start a proper search for medicine she hears Ryuunosuke fall. She scrambles to get back to the bathroom, already horrified that he's hit his head and he's out cold - but thankfully, he's still conscious. He's managed to get the sweatpants on but the shirt seems to have been the problem. He's leaned against the cabinet with a hand pressed against his head and his shirt only halfway on.

"Did you faint?" she asks him gently, deciding to not force him back up. The way he moves his head doesn't tell her if it's a yes or a no, but it's obvious enough to her. It must have had something to do with holding his arms over his head. She helps pull his shirt down all the way, since it seems he got most of the way there on his own.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles, hardly audible.

"Stop. Don't be sorry, Ryuu," she tells him gently. The last thing she wants is for him to feel guilty. "How long have you been feeling bad for?"

"Not long," he murmurs, coughing into his hand, "it hit me this morning."

Gin doesn't think he's being dishonest, because she's seen this happen before. It always seems to go downhill incredibly quickly for him with his poor immune system.

She does her best to be quick, but she has a feeling that he's gotten used to letting this help him wind down. She's careful with washing his face, but she thinks the cool washcloth is soothing with the fever he's running. He probably needs a shower at some point, but she would rather he rest first, especially after he fainted.

She takes a moment to brush out his hair, too. She's thankful that in recent months it doesn't seem to be falling out as much, in fact, there's not much hair caught in the brush at all. She hopes that means he's taking better care of himself, but it's hard to say. It could be a coincidence.

She takes his hand to help him up. He has to lean on the counter for support for a few seconds before he takes any steps further. He's still very dizzy.

“I’m fine,” he tells her, even though she doesn’t say anything to him. He makes it clear that he doesn’t want any help, and Gin knows not to push his limits, so she doesn’t offer it.

"Please go lie down, I'll go get us something to eat," Gin insists.

"You don't need to do that," he murmurs with a sigh. He doesn’t move from where he’s standing.

Gin sighs back at him. "When did you eat last?"

Of course, Ryuunosuke won't answer that.

"It's been over twenty-four hours, I'm guessing. You need to eat, Ryuunosuke,” she says. They’re six years out of the slums and Ryuunosuke is still this stubborn when it comes to food.

"I don't think I'll be able to."

She's always stressed about his weight. He hides it well underneath his clothes, well enough for Gin to forget, most of the time. Gin feels guilty for it. She can see it now, his collarbone past the t-shirt, the way he’s standing making the bony surface of his shoulders a little more prominent.

"Then I need you to take some medicine for your nausea. I'm picking up food whether you can eat it now or not,” she tells him. She won’t push his limits most of the time, but she will when it comes to things like this.

He doesn’t say anything to her, his expression just falls a little like he’s silently accepting her response. That’s good enough for her, he thinks. He takes his body off of the counter and keeps a hand on the wall, tracing it as he takes himself to his bedroom, thankfully with no incident.

Gin decides she’s just going to place an order for something online. She doesn’t want to leave Ryuunosuke alone while he’s feeling like this, and she knows he’s afraid of being left alone with his guard lowered like this - so she finds her phone and puts in an order for something she knows will arrive soon.

She straightens up the bathroom for a few minutes after washing her own face and brushing out her hair. She needs a shower, too. There’s a lot of things she’d like to get done, actually, but she won’t distract herself with things that will take her attention away from Ryuunosuke right now.

She closes the door behind her and peers into the bedroom, hoping he’s at least laying down, by now - but he looks like he’s just sat up, and now he knows she’s there.

"Gin," Ryuunosuke stammers with a hand over his mouth, "the - the trash bin, please -"

By the time Gin can get the bin to him, he's just dry heaving between already painful sounding coughs. Gin can't imagine he has anything in his stomach to bring up, considering how long it's been since he's eaten - and he did this earlier too.

That makes it clear enough how unbearably nauseous he must be. He's far too good at hiding it.

After several minutes, he lies back down with a shaky sigh, not looking relieved in the slightest. He looks like he's in pain, his eyebrows knitted together. His body is frail and weak, he can hardly handle the exertion it takes to even attempt to vomit. Gin can't realistically give him any comfort, which is one of the worst parts of seeing him like this.

“I’ll leave this here, okay?” Gin says, setting the bin down on the floor beside the bed. “Will you take some medicine for the nausea?”

He just nods, sinking back into the pillows underneath him. Gin has always thought he has far too many of them, but if it’s comfortable for him, that’s all that matters to her.

She goes back to the kitchen to fill up a glass of water for him to take with the medicine. She’s a little worried about if he’ll be able to keep it down or not with how nauseous he is right now, but he has a better chance at feeling better taking this than he does just suffering through it.

He takes it without any complaints. Gin busies herself with a few quiet tasks in the apartment - straightening things up, things to keep her hands busy while she decides what to do. She would really like to get a doctor to him now, but she thinks she’ll have a hard time getting him to agree to that. Now, if it has to wait until tomorrow, should she call one in or take him to one? He doesn’t like having people in their apartment for any reason, understandably, but with how he feels right now, any sort of car ride or train ride to a doctor would make him feel significantly worse.

She should probably call Higuchi too, seeing as how the two of them are planned for another meeting tomorrow, but she may put that off to avoid worrying Higuchi for a longer period of time.

She peeks back into his room after half an hour or so, hoping he’s asleep. He's curled into his side, a pillow tucked between his arms. She's thankful that he's finally decided to lie down and stay there, but he looks miserable.

"Can I call a doctor over for you?" Gin asks quietly.

"No," Ryuunosuke murmurs. He’s completely avoiding eye contact, likely very aware that Gin doesn’t like that answer. "I'll be fine tomorrow."

Gin knows he's lying, but she'll respect the boundary he's setting, at least for now. As long as he’s not doing worse.

"If you're not doing better by tomorrow, I'm calling a doctor. Okay?"

He doesn't object to that. He shuts his eyes, and Gin decides to close the door and let him sleep for a while.

17 May, 2012 05:27am

Ryuunosuke sleeps through the day and into the night, which is troubling enough on its own. He’s never been known to sleep for long periods of time at all, not when they were younger and living in the slums, and still not after all of their years outside of the slums. Gin managed to find time to shower, order food in, and not any of her movements woke him. Not even when she laid clothes over his hot forehead, or when she slipped a thermometer under his tingue to take his temperature.

It’s a quarter until six the next morning when she takes his temperature again, and it’s steadily climbing. It stayed at around a hundred even throughout the day, and now as it beeps, the numbers ready one hundred and one point six. She bites her lip, brushing his hair out of his face.

He looks exhausted, but worse than normal. His gaunt face is only dimly illuminated by the lamp in the corner of the room, but even its warm light can’t cover up his horribly pale skin.. She doesn’t think he would have the will or energy to move even if he were awake. His brows are twisted together like he’s still uncomfortable, in pain. Even while he’s sleeping.

“Ryuunosuke…even after all this time, you still look the same when you’re sick,” she says quietly to herself, brushing back his hair, remembering his thirteen-year-old face illuminated by the candle she managed to find at the time. At least they’re safe here. At least she can properly take care of him, now.

Now is probably a good time to call Higuchi.

She steps into the bathroom and shuts the door, to help conceal the sound just in case it were to somehow wake him, as she pulls up Higuchi’s number.

"Gin, is everything okay?" Higuchi stammers almost immediately, not leaving room for a ring. Gin realized she hasn't exactly thought of what to say.

"Hi, miss Higuchi," Gin says a little nervously. She doesn't want to alarm Higuchi, but this isn't exactly a good situation, either. "I just wanted to let you know my brother needs to stay home today…maybe a few days. He's not well."

"I knew he was coming down with something…" she grumbles, sounding frustrated with herself. Gin wasn't want her to put any blame on herself, she's positive Ryuunosuke did his best to hide his condition from her. She hears shifting around, the sound of keys. "I can call a doctor over. Or if you think it's a better idea, I can come pick you two up to take him to the clinic at headquarters, but -"

"I think he'll be okay. It's not too serious," she assures. She’s not quite sure how truthful she’s being, but she didn’t have any plans to involve Higuchi. "I just don't want him to overwork himself."

The shifting stops. “Okay…if you’re sure. But, Gin, please call me if there’s anything I can do to help.”

Gin almost feels herself tearing up at the sentiment. She’s thankful for Higuchi’s kindness and willingness to help, and she’ll certainly take her up on it if she needs it, but for now, she thinks everything is okay.

They end their conversation with a few pleasantries, and Gin steps out into the kitchen.

She hears the cat’s little paws on their front door, and she opens the cabinet at the front door to access her secret stash of cat food for the little thing. There’s a few others on the street that feed the cat, but she thinks that lately, he has begun to favorite her. Ryuunosuke has made remarks here and there that they can’t keep a cat, they’re not home enough, but she thinks there’s no harm in this.

She fills up a little bowl with some kibble and sets it outside the front door for him. It’s started to rain a bit, the cat’s fur is damp. He purs and meows at her, rubbing his head against her hand as she sets it down. She scratches behind his ear as he eats. He really is cute. She wants to give him a name, but she can’t think of anything. She can already hear her brother telling her not to name stray animals, that it creates attachment, but what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.

"Gin…?"

It's so quiet in the apartment that Gin can hear her brother's weak, raspy voice despite being at the front door.  She pats the cat and tells it to be careful before she shuts the door and heads for Ryuunosuke’s bedroom.

She doesn't think that he'll be able to hear her, so she doesn't bother responding. When he’s sick like this with fevers at those numbers, he's so out of it that he has trouble understanding her even when she's right next to him, so she makes great haste in taking a new washcloth from the kitchen to replace the one that's still resting on his forehead.

She's careful when she opens the door just like she always is, but especially now, to avoid scaring him.

His eyes follow her the moment she can see him, but that's all. He doesn't have any energy to move, not even lift his head.

She kneels down beside him on the futon to press the new washcloth against his forehead. She lets a hand linger on his cheek to get an idea if his fever has gotten any worse, and she thinks it may have.

"What's the time…?" he croaks. He’s still so exhausted, it almost looks like he’s fighting to stay awake. She can see it in his eyes.

"I think it's around six in the morning," Gin tells him. She's not entirely sure. She's been up all night looking after him, but she doesn't find herself tired at all. She's used to it. "I contacted Higuchi earlier, she knows you won't make it in today."

"Higuchi…"

"She was very concerned for you," Gin tells him.

Ryuunosuke is quiet from that point forward.

It's raining hard outside. It puts her on edge. It always has, it's a feeling from the slums that she's never been able to shake off, and Ryuunosuke's the same way. But she's worried right now that his fever is bad enough to make that feeling subside. He's so out of it that he almost seems relaxed, which isn't right at all.

His shirt is damp from sweat, she’s noticed. She needs to shower him later when he’s a bit more awake, maybe with some lukewarm water to help bring his fever down a little, but he’s not awake enough to even sit up, right now.

She holds up his head, gently, to slide out the pillow under his head and replace it with a dry one, a cooler one that’s bound to feel nicer. She sees him visibly relax at the feeling as his head sinks back into the pillow.

"I had a strange dream," he says quietly, after a few minutes of silence. His voice is hoarse, it gets quieter with each word to save his throat from the trouble.

"What kind?" she asks him.

"All of our money turned into chocolate."

Gin isn't sure if he's being serious or not, but she remembers this is her brother - he doesn't joke, not ever. She chuckles, she can’t help it.

"Chocolate? Like back in the slums?" she asks.

"It seems so,” he says. She almost sees his lip twitch into a smile, but in the end, without the energy to commit.

She laughs, this time.

"That won't be very useful to us now," Ryuunosuke says.

"It would've been gold back then," she tells him. She’s still plagued with a strange sense of relief whenever she sees chocolate of any kind. They would trade it for anything they needed back then. It was especially useful to them when he was sick - they could trade it for medicine, blankets, clean water.

She brushes through his hair again.

"I remember the time you were really sick, before we lost everyone," she says quietly. They didn’t have anything for him back then, not until she took he situation into her own hands. "They were all so afraid you weren't going to make it through the night."

She sees him tense up.

“It’s only thanks to you that I survived,” he says quietly.

Gin chews her lip.

28 February, 2006, 16:57 - Suribachi City

"How's your shoulder?"

"It's fine."

Gin knows he's lying, but right now, arguing with him isn't worth it at all. Ever since they were forced out of their last place, Ryuunosuke has been on edge. She's afraid even speaking too loudly to him will scare him, and with the loose control he has on his ability, that could be a dangerous situation for her.

"You two should go to sleep," he tells her, and Sayaka meekly standing behind her.

"I can stay up," Gin tells him, but the look he shoots her says he's not willing to accept that answer.

Right now, it's just the three of them. This is how things often end up when Ryuunosuke isn't fit enough to leave their shelter. She's pretty sure that he's broken bones in his knee and shoulder, but he's used his ability to force everything back into place and now he's simply pretending he's not in any pain. Gin can see it, though. He’s trying really, really hard to hold it together.

“I’m not - I’m not gonna argue with you, Gin,” he huffs, clearly frustrated with her non-compliance.

“And I’m not gonna argue either. I’ll stay up. You need to rest, Ryuu,” she says. “I know you’re in pain.”

She knows that he hates her talking like that in front of Sayaka.

Ryuunosuke turns his head away from her, but something else is on his mind, now. She watches his breaths start to pick up the pace. He waves her off and stumbles out of the shelter, I’ll be right back, he tells her silently, but Gin won’t let him run off. She gives Sayaka a look to make sure she doesn’t follow them, and runs after Ryuunosuke.

He didn’t get far at all. He’s just outside of the shelter in the little makeshift alley, sitting on the dirt ground and leaning against the unstable wall.

“What's wrong?” she asks him as she kneels down beside him. She knows he's nauseous, she can see it in the way he holds himself up, in the expression on his face, the way he’s breathing. But he won't say anything. He never does.

He brings a hand over his mouth like he's trying to stop himself from throwing up.

Vomiting is probably the worst thing for them to do here. Food is so hard to come by, especially as they’re just coming out of winter now, and throwing it up is so much worse than just losing the food. The dehydration that follows is the worst part. They don’t have clean water, they don’t have anything at all.

“It’s okay, Ryuunosuke,” she tells him quietly, laying a hand on his shoulder. She bites her lip. If he really is sick, they’ll figure it out. They have to.

She rubs his shoulder and he leans off to the side to choke up what little he’s had in his stomach to begin with. He has a hard time breathing through it, he’s really trying - but she thinks between the nausea and the pain from his injuries, this is all too much. He groans and lowers his head, trying to keep quiet but ultimately losing the battle.

She’s trying to think of a game plan. Rin and Shinya should be back the quickest, the left first this morning, maybe she can leave in their place to see what she can find for him. They won’t have brought back any medicine, they don’t have any idea that Ryuunosuke is sick - and she can’t ask them to turn around, if they’ve been out scavenging for hours.

She takes his arm once she thinks he’s finishing throwing up to lead him back into their shelter. She’ll get him to rest for a while this way, at the very least - he can sleep on the couch cushions they managed to find a few weeks ago.

Sayaka doesn’t say anything when they walk back in - she knows not to, but she can already tell what’s going on, Gin can see it in all of the concern in her eyes.

"Lay down, okay?"

She's shocked that he listens to her, it's telling enough of how he's really feeling. He curls up on the cushions with a little pained noise, his uninjured arm wrapped around his middle.

“It’s just from the pain,” he says quietly, but she knows he’s lying. She’s angry with herself that she didn’t realize he was sick.

Gin isn’t sure what to make of this. She lays a hand on his cheek and realizes he’s warm, so he’s been sick all this time. Getting sick from eating something bad is so much easier to deal with, but he must have an actual illness.

What else can she do? They can't take him to a doctor. Medicine is impossible to come by. They’ve already used everything they could trade in to replace everything they lost at their last shelter. They have absolutely nothing for him.

"What do we do?" Sayaka asks meekly from behind Gin.

“We’ll just see if some rest will do him some good,” Gin assures her with a nod. She’s hoping that will help, she’s praying for it, but she has a feeling they won’t be so lucky.

Shinya and Rin make it back an hour or so later, unfortunately with nothing more than a water bottle - but that’s certainly better than anything else they’ve been finding.

“Gin? Is Akutagawa…?” Shinya starts, eyes darting to Ryuunosuke’s curled up half-asleep form in the corner of the room. Both of them saw him as soon as they got back, but held off on saying anything.

She just nods, she doesn’t need to say much else. Shinya and Rin both exchange nervous glances. Ryuunosuke was sick for nearly two weeks last time, unable to do much other than sit up - and they need him more than anyone else, a fact everyone is painfully aware of. Ryuunosuke’s very aware of this too - that’s why he’s so hesitant to rest at all. He’s the reason all of them are alive. His ability is invaluable.

“He’ll be okay. He has to be,” Rin says with as assuring smile. Gin appreciates the sentiment, it helps her a tiny bit, but she can’t avoid her concern.

A few hours later, most of their group has returned, and Ryuunsouke is doing much, much worse.

He’s thrown up two more times since the first, and Gin’s holding a bin out for him now, Takehiro helping him keep steady because he doesn’t have the fight in him to even hold himself up. He doesn’t even have anything left in his stomach - they tried to get him to drink water a few hours ago, but it just came right back up.

Not to mention the fever. His skin is so hot that it burns to the touch. He’s covered in sweat, his hair is damp from it, but he’s freezing. She watches him shiver under the blankets, even with the fire going, and there’s no telling how bad that fever really is. Gin’s stomach twists, he’s gotten so much worse in a matter of hours. He’s still in so much pain, too.

She watches him blink away tears as he lays back down. It’s humiliating for him. All of these kids look up to him, he’s their pillar, their protector - and now he can’t even sit up on his own. She knows he would rather suffer alone than with any help.

“Gin?” Yuji starts quietly, just after Ryuunosuke has calmed down enough to rest his eyes. Yuji is abnormally quiet, like he doesn’t want anyone else to hear. The rest of them are curled around the fire pit on the other side of the room.

“Yeah?” she says.

“Do you remember…a few months ago, when Akutagawa told us that the Sheep owe him for something?” Yuji starts quietly.

Gin’s eyes widen.

She’d forgotten about that.

She doesn’t remember what he did for them, but she’s not sure he ever told them - but she distinctly remembers that they do in fact owe him something. And right now would be the perfect time to cash in on that and get him some help. The two of them only know this because he's told them that if they need something important, that's the route to go.

This is important. He may not consider it so, but she’s not sure he would survive this kind of illness this time around.

Gin stands up and walks toward the fire pit, where the rest of the group’s wide eyes stare with concern.

“I’m going to get help. Please take care of him while I’m gone,” she says quietly. At least, while he’s this sick, he can’t try to stop her.

“By yourself, Gin?” Rin asks nervously. “I’ll go with you.”

“I won’t be long. I know where I’m going,” she says. Rin’s already been out all day, she can't ask her to waste her energy to simply accompany her. “If I’m not back in two hours, come look for me.”

“Please be careful,” Sayaka squeaks.

Gin nods. She has to make it back for her brother, after all.

She takes her pocket knife out of her bag and stuffs it in her pocket, looking over Ryuunosuke and decides she has to go without saying anything to him - she can’t worry him, not with how awful he’s feeling already. She’ll be back before he can even realize shes left.

She scurries out, only with her knife and a plan to hunt down a sheep.

28 February, 2006, 19:49

Gin spots one after only half an hour of sneaking around their territory. Long, brushed out pink hair. She’s walking inside the building, but Gin won’t let her get that far. She’s cornered this girl before, and she knows that of she gets her, she can get who she wants to come out.

Within seconds, Gin has her against the wall with a knife up to her throat, close enough for her to feel how sharp it is, but not drawing any blood.

Her wild eyes stare straight into Gin’s. She seems to recognize that screaming right away may be a death sentence for her, so she stays quiet for a moment.

“Where is he? Your leader?” Gin growls.

The girl somehow manages to push Gin back long enough to shout something without a knife against her neck. “Shirase!”

“Answer me. Where is he? Where can I find him?” Gin snaps at her, digging the knife again, feeling her hand shake. Realistically, she has no solid way to defend herself, and no reason for them not to kill her - but she doesn’t live in a world where she can politely ask for help.She has to demand it, or else, her brother will continue to suffer.

“Get offa her, bitch!”

Gin whips around fast enough to catch the new boy off guard, presumably Shirase, and she holds the knife up close enough to his throat to draw blood. He's frozen in fear for just a second, caught off guard by Gin’s quick movements, but that’s all she has. He pushes her to the ground.

“Where is he?” she stammers, standing up on her shaking legs. The girl runs behind Shirase and grabs his arm, pointing straight at Gin.

“Kill her! She’s crazy, she tried to slit my throat! I didn’t even do anything!” she shouts, and Gin swallows back her fear. She wants to shut this girl up. If she wanted to slit her throat, she would have.

“The hell do you want with him, huh?” Shirase growls, sticking an arm out over the girl like he expects Gin to go after her again. “I’m not gonna let you near him if you think you can just go around holding knives to our throats, you psycho!”

Gin, for some reason, has enough courage in that second to try to go after him again, but he kicks the knife out of her hand and pushes her to the ground, pressing the heel of his boot into her chest.

“What did I just say, dammit!” he yells, stomping once against her ribcage. She cries out, fairly certain he’s cracked one of her ribs with that action. What they hell was she thinking? Why did she think this was going to be easy, that she could simply get help for her sick brother? She can’t hold her own against these people.

“Get off her, Shirase!”

Another voice shouts, and a boy with red hair suddenly appears in her line of sight. She knew she made the right call. She always sees these two around the leader.

“Don’t go near that bitch, she tried to kill me and Yuan!” Shirase growls. Yuan has already scurried over to snatch Gin’s knife off of the ground before she can reach for it again. “Held that knife to our throats!”

“Well, you still got your heads,” he huffs. Shirase looks completely taken aback by that. He scoffs.

"You're the Sheep's leader, right?" Gin asks. Her hands are shaking as she sits herself up. She has no chance in fighting anyone back now, so she needs to make her case.

"I'm not anyone's leader. Whaddaya want, kid?" The latter snaps. He keeps his hands in his pockets, glaring down at her with a raised eyebrow. The way he looks at her makes her wonder if he recognizes him.

"The Sheep owe us. Our group," Gin says quietly, slowly trying to stand herself up. Shirase and Yuan back up as soon as she does. "My brother, he…he helped you guys with something. A few months ago."

He looks suspicious, and waits for Gin to continue making her case.

“You’re not seriously gonna hear this bitch out, Ch-”

“Shut up. Let her talk, dammit,” he groans, waving his hand around to signal her to continue talking. He doesn’t make any steps forward, anything to make he think he’s going to retaliate. She tries to swallow back her nerves.

"I'm sorry, I don't…he didn't tell me what happened,” she mumbles quietly. She doesn’t have any idea. All she knows is it was significant enough for them to make this deal together.

"Ability user?" The red-head asks, cocking his head to the side, like he’s recovered a memory.

Gin nods.

"The one whose clothes turn into knives," he confirms.

Gin nods again.

"Yeah. We owe him. Where is he?" he asks. Shirase drops his jaw, starting to argue again, but the boy waves up his hand to shut him up. “Why’d he send you and not come here himself?”

"He needs a doctor. He's really sick," she murmurs, eyes dropping to the ground for a moment, intimidated by the red-head’s intense stare. "Do you know anyone that can help him?"

He exchanges a glance with Shirase for a moment. Shirase looks angry that he would even consider helping, but he knows what the latter is about to suggest without him even saying it, it seems.

“We know one in the city,” The leader says.

“Don’t help this punk ass kid, dammit. She just tried to slit Yuan’s throat! And mine!” he reminds him. Yuan doesn’t seem to want to speak up against this, for some reason. She stares back at Gin with a confused look.

“Well, we owe her brother a favor,” The red-head huffs, not even bothering to give him a look. “No take-backs for that kinda stuff. You know how it works, Shirase.”

Shirase pushes his shoulder and nearly knocks him to the ground. “Since when do you put outsiders over the rest of us, huh? The hell’s your deal? If I wasn’t here, this bitch would’a probably killed Yuan, you fuckin’ - ”

“This girl’s brother took out the guy who stole Yuan, you dumbass,” the leader snarls. “She’d be - if it wasn’t for him, she would -”

“This - that guy…?” Yuan starts, eyes suddenly full of concern as she looks over at Gin, and she starts to put all the pieces together. She remembers the day Ryuunosuke killed the trafficker, the man whom he met with to get supplies in exchange for favors. She suddenly feels sick, remembering his face, and then, his dismembered corpse at her feet. She doesn’t remember why Ryuunosuke ended up killing him, but even if it meant their supplies significantly dwindled, she was thankful he was gone for good.

Shirase is suddenly quiet.

“Please,” Gin starts quietly, feeling her eyes flood with tears with the resurgence of those memories, “I just want him to get better.”

“We’ll help you. I’ll get the doctor to come here if you can get your brother here by tonight,” the Sheep’s leader says.

“Next time, you can just ask for help, instead of trying to kill us,” Yuan grumbles, but her expression still holds that sadness.

Gin feels tears slide down her cheeks.

17 May, 2012 10:03am

Gin thinks to herself, that kid looked an awful lot like Chuuya. But that can't be right, there's no way Chuuya's from Suribachi City. Besides, she knew the Sheep leader's name. What was it again…?

"I'm going to go pick up the dry cleaning, I won't be gone for longer than half an hour. Do you think you'll be okay?" she asks Ryuunosuke. He’s been okay over the past few hours. No change in his fever, but he hasn’t thrown up. “I’ll pick up something to eat, too, but I think you might not be ready for that yet.”

“Not yet,” he confirms, letting his eyes fall shut. “I’ll be fine.”

“Okay,” Gin says with a quiet sigh, fixing the cold cloth on his forehead. “Just call me if you need anything, I’ll have my phone on me.”

He doesn’t say anything, but Gin knows she heard him. She dresses herself quickly and scurries out of the front door.

Motomachi isn’t far at all from the apartment, she wouldn’t have left if she knew she couldn’t make it back in a timely manner. She places an order at a restaurant right around the corner from the dry cleaners, that yall it’ll be ready for her once she’s finished picking up their clothes. Efficiently using her time.

She’s caught off guard by a familiar voice before she can wander inside, though.

"Gin!"

Higuchi. Gin whips her head around a little too fast.

"Good morning, ma'am," Gin says, bowing her head for a moment. She’s made herself a little dizzy, but manages to keep her composure.

"You don't have to call me that, Gin. I've said you can call me Ichiyo," Higuchi says. Gin isn't sure she wants to do that. Higuchi is still technically her superior, but she thinks she's latched onto the fact that she knows Gin's secret, now. "How's Akutagawa doing?"

"He seems to be doing better," Gin says, but it's not necessarily true. She'd rather give a vague answer than worry Higuchi any more than she already has. She wonders why Higuchi isn’t at work, but it makes sense that she wouldn’t have any reason to go in with Akutagawa home sick.

There's a girl standing close enough to Higuchi to lead Gin to believe they're out here together, and she almost does a double take at how similar they look. They must be related, but Higuchi's never mentioned anything about having siblings - let alone one that’s near identical to her.

"Ah, sorry, Kuniko," Higuchi says. The girl smiles as Higuchi politely gestures to Gin. "This is one of my coworkers."

"Subordinate," Gin corrects, bowing her head again.

"And Gin, this is my younger sister, Kuniko,” Higuchi introduces cheerfully. The girl smiles back at her.

“It’s nice to meet you! I’ve heard a lot about you,” Kuniko says, a statement that warms Gin’s ears up. What kind of things is she telling her sister about them? “Sorry if we’ve interrupted your plans.”

“Oh - no, it’s okay,” Gin says politely. “I was just going to pick up dry cleaning and some food before I head back home.”

“Do you think he needs to see a doctor, Gin?” Higuchi asks, her eyes suddenly full of concern. She’s not sure what tipped her off. Maybe there was too much urgency in her voice.

“I’d…I’d like him to, but…” Gin says nervously. She chews at her lip.

"I'm so sorry, I should've tried harder to get him to see one yesterday," Higuchi murmurs. She knows that Huguchi’s best efforts would have been wasted on him anyway, he’s far too stubborn to ever take advice or listen to that sort of thing - but of course, Higuchi’s guilt over the situation is tangible nonetheless. Gin doesn't blame her one bit. “I wish I’d noticed sooner…”

"It's alright, ma'am. He's stubborn," Gin says. Of course, to her, the signs are obvious, but she's known Ryuunosuke since she was born. He'll start to space out and become confused over things that make perfect sense. Sometimes he'll get quiet. He way he breathes has been engraved into her memory. She spent several nights keeping watch over him in the slums when he was sick enough to make her think she would wake up to hear his breathing cease.

"Gin?" she says.

"Yes?"

“He’s been getting sick more often,” Higuchi says quietly, her eyes lowered. “I’m worried.”

“I know,” Gin says, but it’s all she can say. She doesn’t know why. He’s never had a good immune system, but it’s only gotten worse. He won’t see doctors, he won’t tell Gin how he’s feeling or why, not ever. All she can do is watch.

"I promise I'll keep a better eye on him, next time,” Higuchi says.

"Please don't blame yourself,” Gin tells her. She would rather take the blame onto herself.

The dry cleaners and picking up food both take much longer than she would have liked them to, and she ends up back at their apartment about an hour later than she planned.

She sets the take-out back on the counter and drops the dry cleaning bag onto the floor before she scurries back to Ryuunosuke’s bedroom, but there’s no sign of him in bed. The sheets are disheveled like he was in a hurry to get out.

"Ryuunosuke?" Gin calls out, but she doesn't see him anywhere in the room. He might be in the bathroom. She’s worried that he’s thrown up again.

She knocks, briefly, to no response. She opens the door, slowly, carefully - Ryuunosuke is curled up against the wall, arms wrapped around his middle, features twisted up in pain. She doesn’t think he’s entirely awake, but he’t not asleep.

“Ryuunosuke?” Gin starts, kneeling in front of him, "You should go back to bed. It's not good for your body to sleep like this.”

She thinks his fever's gotten worse. He's not responding to her. He looks as white as a sheet, and he doesn’t show any sign that he’s heard a word she’s said to him.

"Ryuunosuke, I think -"

Her hand grazes his waist in an attempt to grip his arm, only for a moment, but it sets something off. He flinches so hard that she's worried for a moment he's hit his head, but the bigger problems begin when the ends of his sweatshirt turn into tendrils and hurdle toward her throat. They're wrapped tight around her neck before she can even think to fight back. He’s almost using enough force to pull her off of the ground, and no amount of pulling at his ability could possibly get her out of the restraint.

She feels like she’s going to die. She can feel it start to get sharp, but the choked plea she manages is enough to bring her brother back to reality.

As soon as he lets go, coughs and coughs, really thinking for a moment that she was going to stop breathing. She lifts her head and sees Ryuunosuke halfway up, staring at her wild-eyed, horrified at what he’d just done.

She knows why. He's never once told her, but she knows.

"Gin…I, I'm -" he hardly manages before he forces himself up to vomit into the toilet bowl, clearly not for the first time that day. Gin's angry with herself, she chose a terrible time to leave him. She should have known he would only get worse.

She knows she's safe to touch him now. He's alert, he's said her name. She scoots up closer to him and rubs his back. There’s nothing left for him to bring up. He’s just coughing and dry-heaving. It sounds so painful.

Gin bites her lip when she spots blood drip down his chin.

"I'm sorry," he whispers. His voice shakes. He can’t lift his head just yet, he’s still trying to catch his breath.

"Please don't be sorry," she says quietly. "It's okay."

She holds him for a few moments after he finally lifts his head. She wants him to know he's truly safe, and leave no doubt in his mind.

She can't help but cry.

"Gin…" he manages pulling back and reaching a hand out like he’s trying to comfort her.

"I'm sorry, it's not - it's not what you did," she murmurs. Of course, it scared her, but she's heartbroken that he still reacts like that. He'll never, ever let his guard down. That’s the worst part of it all.

"Your neck…" he says, his face all twisted up with the slew of emotions he’s feeling. God, he’s so pale. He looks like he’ll pass out any second.

"It's okay, Ryuunosuke, I promise,” she assures him, rubbing at the spot that’s starting to become sore. This is truly the last thing he needs to be worrying about. She’s dealt with much, much worse. “Let’s get you back to bed, okay? I think - ”

His eyes roll back and his whole body goes limp and falls forward before she can even finish her sentence. She hears a tiny noise of discomfort from him as she lifts him up to take him back to bed, but she certainly can’t let him fall asleep in the bathroom again.

She manages to get him back to bed, deciding to change out his comforter to something not so damp. His skin is so, so hot - she bites her lip when she feels his forehead. It must feel nice, her cool hand, she can see him visibly relax at the touch.

His eyes open again when she lays a washcloth over his forehead. His eyes don’t look for Gin for a few minutes. She takes his temperature, and the thermometer reads one hundred and three, now. It’s a miracle he’s able to talk to her at all. God, he must feel absolutely miserable.

“Hey,” she greets quietly when his eyes finally find her face, “you passed out.”

She doesn’t want to cause any confusion. He sighs, like he’s disappointed in himself.

“I think I should take you to a doctor, Ryuunosuke,” she tells him. She knows he’s not going to get any better on his own, especially with how much he’s throwing up despite eating nothing.

“I’ll be fine,” he breathes out quietly.

She sighs again. She wishes he weren’t so stubborn. She can’t imagine feeling as miserable as he is right now and refusing any kind of outside help.

"I ran into Higuchi earlier," Gin tells him, “she’s worried about you. She offered to take you to a doctor. Or call one in.”

"She's a fool," he whispers, turning his head away. He can’t comprehend anyone else caring for him. He’s never understood the lengths that Higuchi has gone to for him.

"She's just worried," Gin says. "You don't need to be so secretive with her. It might have saved you some trouble if you told her you weren't doing well yesterday."

"It's not her problem to deal with," he murmurs. He coughs a few times.

Of course he would think that way.

Gin isn't sure what she can do to change his mind. This has been the way he's thought since they were kids. His problems are his own. He never shares them with Gin, she always just happens to find out.

"That doesn't mean you should suffer alone, Ryuunosuke,” she tells him. "You wouldn't want me to suffer alone, would you?"

He scoffs, like it’s a ridiculous comparison, somehow.

"I doubt you would want that for Higuchi either. Or Tachihara, for that matter… any of us. I know you’re not heartless,” she says, patting his hair.

“You always say strange things,” he says quietly, the last of his words drifting off as he starts to fall asleep once more.

17 May, 2012, 17:41

Only a few hours later, Gin’s finding it hard to breathe after she checks the thermometer.

One hundred and four point one.

She can’t wait anymore. He needs to see a doctor right away. Even if it’s not what he wants, someone needs to help him, to do more than Gin possibly can from their apartment. Her hands shake as he brushes his hair from his face - he’s not reacting to anything. Not to any pinches, squeezing his arm, nothing.

But the worst part is that even through his delirium, only a few moments ago, he turned his head to the side to choke up a mouthful of blood, staining the white pillowcase beside him.

She scrambles for her cell phone and searches for Higuchi’s contact. It rings. Once, twice, three times, and Gin almost hangs up, but Higuchi finally answers.

"Miss Higuchi," Gin murmurs, trying her hardest to hide the shake in her voice. She knows there’s no hiding it.

"Gin? Are you okay?" she asks immediately, evidently recognizing the hurt in her voice right away. She already hears shuffling, like he’s getting ready to leave her apartment.

"He’s not…he’s not responding anymore. He needs a doctor,” is all she says, tears slipping from her eyes. She dips her head onto his shoulder and squeezes his arm, tight. His far too hot skin. She can’t see anything in front of her, the salty tears blocking her vision.

“I’ll be right there. Please don’t worry, I’ll be there very soon, okay?” she says gently, but Gin can hear it in her voice, too. She’s afraid.

Gin hangs up the phone and chokes back a sob.

Higuchi arrives in record time only minutes later, Gin stumbles to the front door to let her in, tear tracks staining her cheeks. She tries to wipe them off, she sees the way Higuchi is looking at her like she’s absolutely heartbroken to see her like this - it only makes her cry more.

“Hey, it’s okay, Gin,” Higuchi tells her calmly, holding her and squeezing her tight for just a moment. Gin sobs, covers her face, Higuchi pulls out of the hold and takes her hand before Gin leads her to Ryuunosuke’s bedroom.

Gin won’t have any problem carrying him, he’s so horribly thin, but Higuchi is still on standby. She sees the horror on her face as soon as she’s in the doorway, seeing Ryuunosuke in the state that he’s in - the blood, his white skin, the way he’s nearly limp as Gin lifts him from the bed. Even then, she gets no reaction from him, nothing but a pained moan.

“He’s not responding at all…?” she asks with a shake in her voice as she follows Gin out of the front door and down the steps to her car. Higuchi opens the back door for her to set Ryuunosuke in.

Gin gets into the other side of the backseat just as Higuchi climbs into the front, and without any deliberation, they’re off.

Higuchi tells her on the way there that she’s already notified the nursing staff at the Port Mafia headquarters infirmary that they would be on their way, which is reassuring, they’ll be ready. Gin cries and squeezes her brother’s hand the whole short ride there. Nothing has changed. Even six years later, she’s still terrified of losing him.

They get him up to the infirmary floor of the building in no time at all, and without any reaction from Ryuunosuke. She watches his eyes flutter, like he was trying to regain control, but simply couldn’t. She quietly reassured him the whole way, just in case she could hear him.

Once Gin takes him inside, she lays him down in the cot that they’ve prepared for him and she kneels down beside it, her hands reaching up to the guards on the side. Higuchi has already run over to the staff, and she tries to listen in, but she’s too focused on the restraints on the sides of the cot.

Her stomach drops.

"We won't treat him unless he's been stripped of anything he can weaponize," the doctor says as she approaches, neither her nor any of the nursing staff daring to come any closer.

Gin freezes in place, and stares at them in horror.

She understands their hesitancy to treat him. He's dangerous. He's killed members of their staff, years ago. After that point, Dazai was required to be present for any treatment that Ryuunosuke underwent, to negate any effects of his ability.

But he's not here. There’s no one who can do that anymore.

"Please don't do this," Gin says quietly, slowly standing beside the cot. She’s familiar with this doctor. She’s treated her many times, but she becomes very cold whenever her brother is brought up in conversation. "You don't understand how humiliating that is."

"It's not worth risking the lives of my staff, sir,” the doctor says. She holds eye contact. She almost looks like she feels guilty. Higuchi stands behind her, eyes wide and confused. She likely had no idea that this would be involved at all. 

"I'll stay here while you treat him. If it looks like he'll hurt anyone at any point, I'll take the hits," Gin stammers, biting her lip. She’s not even sure that would work. She’s just so desperate for someone to help him, She knows he's dangerous. He's hurt her against his own true will many times. She can still feel his sweater wrapped around her neck and holding her in the air. But it's all out of fear. He's lived so much of his life with no choice but to be that way.

“Please, please help him. He’s so sick,” Higuchi begs, eyes darting between the doctor and her staff.

“I will have him thrown out the moment he hurts any of my staff. Do you understand?” she says.

Gin begrudgingly nods. She just needs someone to help him.

They’ve made their agreement, and finally, the nurses start treating him.

Gin stays beside him the whole time, knees on the tile and elbows on the side of the cot, squeezing Ryuunosuke’s hand. He’s so out of it. He doesn’t react to a single thing that’s going on. Not even the multiple attempts to palace an IV catheter - he had terrible veins and it’s always a painful process for him, but even now, there’s no reaction.

They’re able to get some medications in him, too, through the IV, ones that she doesn't have to worry about coming back up. Something for the nausea, his fever - the doctor said she’s concerned about his lungs, she doesn’t like the sound she’s hearing. Gin knows they aren’t good to begin with, but the doctor is concerned about him developing pneumonia. She squeezes his hand tight again, and just as the doctor sets her stethoscope on his chest again, she feels him flinch.

The tendril stabs through her shoulder before she can recognize it, and she stops breathing for a moment. It's so painful. She's never felt anything more sharp than the fabric of Ryuunosuke's ability, it's almost so sharp that it's numb. She realizes it’s only hit her because of the angle she’s at. He meant to hit the doctor.

"Ryuunosuke," she chokes out, gritting her teeth. "They're trying to help you, Ryuu, please let them. Please."

His eyes are so wide and full of fear. She squeezes his hand tighter. The doctor is frozen in place, fully aware that one wrong move could result in a decapitation.

“I’m here, okay? I would never let anyone hurt you,” she says, tears flooding her eyes.

“I’ll try to give him a sedative,” The doctor whispers. She mentioned that she’s been hesitant on giving him one with the condition of his lungs, but it’s necessary.

One of the nurses has already had one on standby.

He makes a sound that almost resembles her name. He’s fighting to keep his eyes open. Gin cries just looking at that expression, it’s more heartbreaking than anything she’s ever seen on him. She can feel the tendril start to slide of her shoulder and return to its normal form as the doctor injects the sedative into his IV line, and the blood from the hole in her shoulder starts to drip down onto the cot.

Within seconds, his eyes fall shut.

“Gin - ” Higuchi gasps as she runs over, two other nurses following one they realize Ryuunosuke is sedated.

“Will he be okay?” Gin breathes out, wincing as one of the nurses rip the cloth from her shirt to expose her shoulder. “With - with that sedative?”

“I’ll keep a close eye out on him,” she says, brows knit together at the sight of Gin’s injury. She doesn’t want to look. It hurts so much, she hears the whispers from the nurses behind her as they try to coax her into sitting on the neighboring cot, but she doesn’t want to move.

“Gin, let them help you, please,” Higuchi tells her gently, taking her hand and moving her back to the cot. Her voice is shaking so much. “I’ll watch Akutagawa, okay? Let them help you before they can’t fix this anymore.”

Gin's finally starting to get tired herself. She feels her eyes roll back, a few shouts of her name, and everything is black.

May 19, 2012, 18:03

The soreness in her shoulder is the first thing she feels when she starts to feel herself coming back.

“Thank goodness, Gin,” she hears Higuchi say with an exasperated sigh. “I thought you were going to sleep forever…”

She finds Higuchi looming over her when she opens her eyes again, looking concerned but relieved all at the same time.

“Guess not takin’ care’a yourself finally caught up to ya’,” a new voice says, one that she recognizes, but certainly not one that was in the room last time she was awake. She rubs at her eyes as she tries to figure it out, and her stomach drops when her brain finally connects the dots.

Tachihara. Tachihara, who said he would be gone for four days last time that she saw him. Which, if she’s doing the math right -

“How long was I asleep?” she gasps as she sits herself up, wincing hard at the pain in her shoulder. Higuchi squeaks and lays a hand over it, frantically looking around for something to help her.

“I think…it’s been over forty-eight hours, now…” Higuchi says, meekly asking her to be careful as she leans forward to see if Ryuunosuke is still in the cot beside her.

He is. He’s sitting up, propped up by some pillows, leaning forward a little like he’s been watching her, too - as soon as they make eye contact, his shoulders relax with a sigh.

God, she’s so glad to see he’s doing better.

Gin scrambles to get out of the cot, with Higuchi nearly stumbling after her. Ryuunosuke seems a little surprised to see her move so quickly, and she regrets it a little - she feels dizzy, but she needs to check him over.

"Gin," he whispers, eyebrows knit together, "your shoulder."

She looks down at it, finding that blood is starting to seep through the hospital gown she’s been dressed in. It hurts, a lot more than most injuries she’s recieved, but she won’t show him that. She lays her hand over it.

"It's okay," she tells him quietly. He looks so much better than before. There’s color in his face again, his eyes aren’t so glazed over - there’s still an IV catheter in his arm, so he’s still recovering, but this is a massive improvement from before. “You look like you’re feeling a lot better.”

He sighs, like he was expecting her to say that. “You need to look after yourself, Gin.”

“Only if you promise to do that yourself first,” she tells him. Higuchi has found a chair for her and she urges her to sit down, taking note of her shaking legs, not quote yet ready to be walking around after being asleep for so long. She sighs. She hadn’t slept the entire time she was taking care of her brother, and the stress of it all really knocked her out for that long.

“I’m sorry, Gin,” he says to her, very quiet, eyes turned away. He feels guilty, she can see that clear as day. It hurts her to see.

“It’s okay. It’s not your fault you got so sick, but you have to let me get help for you sooner next time. Okay?” she tells him, taking his free hand. He just nods, not quite wanting to look her in the eye yet, but that’s fine. As long as he’s acknowledged her words.

“You guys are scary similar,” Tachihara puffs.

“They are…” Higuchi sighs.

[robsterskellington]

Shin Soukoku again being the more popular vote, huh? This snippet has Vanitas being more of a side character, but he's still involved.

Context: "In six months time, I'm going to kill you." Akutagawa never breaks his promises, right?

*It's time.*

That text had frozen Atsushi's heart, and made him feel sick. After getting the date confirmed, he realised that it had been exactly six months since the end of the Cannibalism Incident, and thus it was time for Akutagawa to fight Atsushi to the death.

*Why? Why did this have to happen? I thought we were getting along, I thought we finally understood each other!* His thoughts weren't helping matters in the slightest- he felt betrayed, but how could he not? Akutagawa had been hanging out with him a lot; sometimes they sparred and fought, sometimes they simply met for tea, and sometimes Akutagawa would simply be there whenever Byakko needed to run around in that beautiful forest.

But clearly it was all for nothing. Akutagawa would never break a promise, especially not for an *enemy*. That's all Atsushi was, in the end. And it hurt, oh God it hurt. He had to excuse himself and run to the bathroom, crying his eyes out. This was always going to happen, Atsushi knew that, but... knowing that the time had come, knowing that Akutagawa was ready to kill him, it made him throw up.

Eventually he emerged, and simply texted back to ask where to meet. Maybe Atsushi would beat Akutagawa? But then would Akutagawa stop if Atsushi defeated him, or would the fight only stop when one of them died? Atsushi had to come to terms with the fact that it was likely Akutagawa had only been so kind, so good to him, to soften him until he refused to fight him, which would just give Akutagawa an easy win.

His sour mood didn't go unnoticed, but nobody spoke to him. Vanitas seemed keen on keeping everyone away from him, and Ranpo was helping. Dazai wasn't in the office, he was likely bothering Chuuya. Atsushi suddenly growled and faced them, "What's the deal with you all?!"

"Atsushi, just calm down." Vanitas spoke softly and looked at him, "Just go meet Akutagawa, and we'll talk later, okay?" Vanitas had been informed of the promise, but he didn't look nervous. If anything, there was a slight smile hidden on his face, and Atsushi noticed a twinkle in Yosano's eyes. They were up to something, obviously.

Atsushi was texted a bunch of coordinates- he still struggled to read them, so he showed Kyouka, who instructed him to go to the Port, and to an abandoned warehouse that had red paint, crumbling off on the outside. She then gave Atsushi a big hug, since she clearly wasn't in the same know-how as Ranpo, Yosano and Vanitas, and whispered softly, "Even if he begs you, don't kill him. And please don't die, I can't lose you."

He held her tightly, then kissed her forehead. She truly was the little sister he wished he had. After taking a breath, he left, his tears dry and his heart hardened.

****

After a walk that took entirely too long as a result of Atsushi dragging his feet, he arrived at the designated location. The whole area was barren, save some dilapidated buildings. The warehouse he was sent to was empty, just the main structures and some railings remained.

Akutagawa was stood leaning against a pillar, scrolling on his phone, not even dressed in his usual gear- his iconic coat was nowhere to be seen, he was wearing black jeans, black converse and a sky blue hoodie. Only a select few people, (meaning Dazai, Gin and Atsushi), knew that Akutagawa's favourite colour was actually lighter shades of blue.

The outfit was... inappropriate. Not because of the clothes having anything wrong with them, but because Rashōmon wouldn't have a good reach with them, though Akutagawa obviously didn't care. He looked completely relaxed, as if he hadn't just summoned Atsushi for a death match. That sight completely enraged him and he clenched his fists.

"*AKUTAGAWA!!*"

Atsushi jumped down, shaking with fury, but Akutagawa looked calm. In fact, after seeing Atsushi, he grew a warm smile, one that made Atsushi's heart skip a beat, "Greetings, Weretiger."

"...*greetings*?! That's all you can say right now? Fucking *greetings*?!" What was Akutagawa's play? This was insulting and ridiculous, and Akutagawa had the audacity to downplay his feelings?!

Akutagawa stood up properly, and walked calmly towards Atsushi, keeping his hands in his pockets, "You're upset, but you shouldn't be." Before the younger man could shout again, Akutagawa gently continued, "Jinko. I've spent my entire life making and keeping promises. I've never broken a promise. Only now do I realise just how idiotic that is."

That wasn't what Atsushi expected. It wasn't stupid to keep promises, was it? That was when a horrible image flashed in Atsushi's mind- Fukuchi and that cursed sword, slashing Akutagawa's throat. If Atsushi hadn't made Akutagawa promise not to kill, they might not have even gotten to that point. They could have killed the bastard before he could summon the sword. He couldn't speak, and he couldn't look at the man in front of him.

Akutagawa saw Atsushi's expression, and took that as a sign to continue, "These past six months have taught me so much. Finding ways to resolve situations without killing is certainly a good alternative, and it's less paperwork." He was only half-joking, but saw that Atsushi didn't even crack a smile. Taking another breath, he got to his point: "I can't kill you. I don't want to, so I refuse. This will be the first promise I *break*."

"...what?" This wasn't real. It couldn't be. But he hoped it was, that he wouldn't wake up and find out that this was just a dream.

Akutagawa took a step closer and smiled at Atsushi, "I... wanted to know what my actual feelings were. So during the time limit I set for us, I decided to spend time with you. I've been alive for nearly 21 years, and I swear that I've never laughed, cried, or enjoyed myself as much as I have when we're together. Being around you simply feels right. If I kill you, then that's all gone, and I cannot allow that."

He couldn't ignore his emotions anymore, and he didn't even really understand his jealousy in the first place! Sure, Atsushi got all of Dazai's attention and praise, but one, he'd earned every word of encouragement and kindness, and two, Akutagawa was dealing with a version of Dazai that was toxic and cruel. The facts of the matter was that they were a great team, the New Double Black, and knew that they could trust each other in any life or death situation. Akutagawa was done being cold to Atsushi, the man he willingly gave up his life for.

Atsushi was shaking, he felt more emotional than he'd done in a long time. Without thinking, he hugged Akutagawa tightly, sobbing into his chest. The tears fell more when he felt the other wrapping his arms securely around him, the two of them just embracing. After a little longer, Atsushi sniffed, "...Ryū? Is this really what you want?"

"I want a lot more, but that'll come later." He chuckled weakly, stroking the back of Atsushi's head, his eyes closed as he enjoyed the Weretiger's warmth, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier. I wanted to, but I was so scared you wouldn't believe me. I didn't want you to hate me again, we've come so far from when we first met."

"Still, I'll get you for scaring me like that, you lunatic." They both laughed a little, and Atsushi finally calmed down, pulling away and wiping his eyes. They needed to talk things through properly, but while his emotions and mind were a bit fried, Atsushi looked up at Akutagawa, "I was scared. I didn't wanna die, I didn't wanna hurt you. Seeing you die on the ship..." he frowned then tilted his head, "You never answered my question. Why did you save me that day? Was it because of Dazai's orders, or because you wanted to kill me yourself back then?"

"Actually, when he ordered me to protect you, I initially refused at the time, like a fool." Akutagawa reached out and stroked Atsushi's cheek, "I saved you, simply because I wanted you to live. I wanted you to see that even if you thought you had no right to live, other people like myself disagree. You have every right to live, and I'm so grateful every day I see you, alive and well. No more suffering or pain."

He'd never heard those words before. Atsushi had never been told that others wanted him to live. Sometimes implications weren't enough. Sure, Kyouka had asked him not to die, but it wasn't quite the same. Someone being grateful that Atsushi was alive felt so foreign to him, so alien. Coming from Akutagawa, it felt sincere. Leaning into Akutagawa's touch, he felt tears well up again, but he didn't fight to keep them, just letting them fall.

Once he regained his composure, Atsushi assumed that maybe they could go out for tea or something, but Akutagawa looked nervous suddenly, "Actually, would you mind taking me to the Agency? I believe your head detective will have figured out that I'm not keeping this particular promise, so there's no need for hostility."

"I mean, sure. I can bring you." He knew now that after six months of not killing, Akutagawa had changed. There was no way he'd flip like a switch now, especially when Akutagawa had since acknowledged that Dazai belonged at the Agency. Akutagawa was in the Port Mafia, so killing was unavoidable, but Akutagawa would *try* not to, so that gave Atsushi some peace. But still, "May I ask why, first?"

"You may, and I shall tell." Akutagawa looked uncomfortable for a moment, then looked at Atsushi with a soft expression, "As you're aware, I have a lung disease that's slowly but surely killing me. However, five months ago, Vanitas had given me a medicine to soothe the pain, and allow me to breathe properly. Because of it, I have grown physically stronger, and I feel healthier."

Atsushi knew all this, of course. Vanitas had given Akutagawa the herbal remedy he'd concocted while the Port Mafia were still Vampires, and he'd been taking it for so long that his coughing was a rare occurrence now. The problem was that lungs, once damaged, tend to remain that way. The medication helped with the breathing difficulties, and helped Akutagawa do more with his body and life, but the lung disease would kill him in the end.

He felt his heart fill with light when Akutagawa continued: "Before, I was so weak that if your Doctor Yosano tried to use her Ability on me, I would have died before Thou Shalt Not Die could activate, which is one Hell of a feat, considering it can cure death in certain circumstances." He cleared his throat, "Now... I'm not that weak anymore. I can survive. So, please take me to her... so I can get rid of this cursed illness once and for all, and live for as long as I can."

Atsushi was having a day of emotional whiplash. What started off with pure fear, was now a situation that filled him with so much joy that he couldn't see straight. Acting without thinking, Atsushi threw his arms around Akutagawa, who held him securely and swung him around using the momentum created, laughing! It was so ridiculous, but they were both happy and clearly doing things in the heat of the moment. This was completely verified by Atsushi, slamming his lips onto Akutagawa's.

The Black Caped Beast, the Rabid Dog of the Port Mafia, was stunned silent and completely red in the face as the infamous Weretiger of the Armed Detective Agency kissed him like he needed Akutagawa's lips in order to breathe. In that moment, Akutagawa felt the same way, his arms holding Atsushi close, both of them aware of Byakko and Rashōmon purring within them, also happy.

Once they pulled apart, Atsushi grabbed Akutagawa's hand and practically dragged him to the Agency; it was a good thing that Akutagawa's lungs were already on the mend, at least now he could keep up without losing breath too fast and feeling like trash! He didn't want anything to ruin the moment they just had...

****

Vanitas and Ranpo had smug looks on their faces when they saw the boys return, and Akutagawa glared, "...you both really did call it."

"Yep!" Ranpo grinned as Vanitas explained, "However, we didn't want to risk anything going wrong, so we kept it to ourselves. The only other people who figured this out was the President, and Doctor Yosano."

As if summoned, Yosano came from the infirmary, looking surprised when Akutagawa bowed to her, "Doctor Yosano, after everything I've done, I understand if you refuse, but... I'm in desperate need of healing. Even with Vanitas' medicines, I'm not going to live too long with my lungs in this state. I'm willing to pay any price-"

Yosano cut him off by raising her hand, and looked at him, "You're a patient in need of help, and I'm aware that Vanitas' medicines can only do so much, while Mr. Mori is useless when it comes to diseases. You don't need to pay me anything, I'm just proud of you for finally admitting that you need help." She looked towards Atsushi and smiled, "You can trust me with Akutagawa's health."

It wouldn't take long, but Atsushi was still nervous at seeing Yosano drag Akutagawa into the infirmary. Kyouka had to hold him back when he heard the chainsaw whirring and Akutagawa's scream- he'd never heard Akutagawa scream with utter fear before, and he silently vowed that he would never let Akutagawa scream like that ever again. Kyouka hugged Atsushi, and he leaned into her. Obviously he knew that Yosano would cure Akutagawa completely, but it was still nerve-wracking to wait.

It was only a couple of minutes before Yosano came out, with a satisfied look, "Okay, that lung disease is all gone! And *yes* Atsushi, you can-" He zipped right past her before she could finish her sentence, but she found herself still doing so, "...see him now."

Vanitas laughed and went to make Yosano some tea to help her recover, "How bad?"

"If you hadn't given him that stuff, Akutagawa's lungs would have gotten worse. That boy hasn't smoked in his life, but his lungs were in a similar state to a chain smoker." She looked tired, but it was obvious that she thought it was worth it. "He probably would have died before meeting the six month deadline he'd set for Atsushi."

That was depressing, but unfortunately that was how unlucky life could be for some people. Akutagawa was already sickly, prone to infections and illnesses of all kinds. It was good that now he had support, and was able to trust people enough to help him. After giving Yosano the tea, Vanitas and Kyouka peaked inside the infirmary to see that Akutagawa was sound asleep in the bed, with Atsushi holding his hand and resting his head on the edge of aforementioned bed.

Vanitas smiled and grabbed an extra blanket, covering Atsushi's sleeping form before taking Kyouka's hand and leading her to the café to relax for a while. He'd already taken note of the fact that Akutagawa's breathing sounded steady, and he didn't look uncomfortable anymore. His chest no longer rattled, and he didn't cough himself awake.

*****

Akutagawa woke up an hour later, and he could immediately feel that he was *better*. It didn't feel like smoke was filling his lungs, and he couldn't taste blood in the back of his throat anymore. He felt someone squeeze his hand, and turned to smile at Atsushi taking a nap close to him. His heart hammered at the memory of that kiss, and he blushed to himself.

Maybe this partnership had more similarities to Chuuya and Dazai's than he thought. Working together, capable of destruction, and at the end of the day, they completed each other. Akutagawa and Atsushi weren't a single soul in two bodies, but their Abilities in the form of Kokko Zessō absolutely was.

Akutagawa smiled to himself as he watched Atsushi slowly awaken from his nap, and he couldn't help but stroke Atsushi's face when he saw that sleepy smile, "Ryū... how you feeling?"

"Healthy." That was honestly the best way to describe how he felt at this moment. Akutagawa leaned forward and pressed his forehead against Atsushi's, the pair of them holding each other like that for a moment.

It felt like now or never, so Atsushi spoke softly, "I... Ryū, I think I've made my thoughts clear, but I'm still gonna say it. I don't want us to be enemies anymore, or rivals. You may be in the Port Mafia, but that doesn't matter to me. I just... I just want to spend my life with you..."

That was something exceedingly dangerous to ask of a Mafia member, however Akutagawa completely returned that sentiment. He'd known Atsushi for months now, and they'd been through so much together. All Akutagawa wanted was to watch Atsushi live his life, while standing beside him the entire time. He'd never attack Atsushi, and he didn't particularly have any beef with the Agency, so a feud was pointless in his opinion.

All Akutagawa could do in response was pull Atsushi onto the bed with him, hold him close, and kiss him again. Atsushi squeaked, but wrapped his arms around Akutagawa and let them both sink into the bed, staying there for what felt like hours.

This was trust. This was loyalty. This was *love*.

[lilac-cat-draws]

Been taking my time, adding some stuff in this AU, mostly starting off with writing some dialogue along with some sketches that I think would fit the characters in the Genshin universe

I’m not going to write all of the voice overs, so I'll be mostly focusing on the ones I think would be more interesting to write about, also it was very difficult for me to get this to sound in character so this is my attempt

Dazai’s “Voice-Over”

Hello

Greetings I’m Osamu Dazai, it’s a pleasure to meet you. If you need any help, come to the Armed Detective Agency and we’ll deal with the issue. But looking at you, you seem to be handling things fine on your own, but if you’re considering feel free to contact us.

~

About Kujou Sara

Ah, you mean the tengu lady in the Tenryou Commission? Why yes I’ve met her, she would work along side us on more difficult cases and we don’t really see eye to eye most of the time which is unfortunate.

~

About Shikanoin Heizou

Never thought that the Tenryou Commission would have their own skilled detective, he’s sharp like a certain someone I know and his method of investigation is quite unique. A detective who stops a crime before it even starts, hmm interesting.

~

About Nakajima Atsushi

Atsushi has been my most fateful subordinate ever since I took him in. The boy has a lot of potential under all of his insecurities, also he’s been the most reliable when it comes to doing the paperwork I don’t want to do.

~

About Ryuunosuke Akutagawa

Oh him? I don’t have anything special to say about him in particular but I had something in mind. What is it? Well I’m not telling.

~

About Nakahara Chuuya

Ugh, that slug? He can be irritating sometimes, not to mention his fashion sense I mean really? *sigh* Besides that, he has his moments where he’s a lot more bearable and it is fun to mess with him whenever I get the chance.

~

About the Vision

I didn’t think the gods would acknowledge me of all people to deserve a vision, well I personally don’t mind this, but I doubt I’d really put this thing to much further use, other than what I used to use it for.

~

Birthday

Hey, since today is your special day, thought I’d take you around they city and grab something to eat, and as for the bill you don’t have to worry about that, my work partner can pay the expenses for us later.

~

More About Osamu Dazai: I

Have you ever been to our detective agency by any chance? It can be quite the treat if you get the chance to know us and as someone with first hand experience I’ll gladly give you a tour of the office and the various cases we deal with on a regular basis, hey I could even recruit you in, you seem to have the skills to join. No need? well it’s fine but if you change your mind, the offer is still on the table.

~

More About Osamu Dazai: II

There is this one coworker I know who is really fun to tease, he sticks to his ideals so much he can be a bit gullible. i would sometimes give him what he thinks could be vital information only for me to them tell him it wasn’t true. Believe me, it really livens up the workplace.

~

More About Osamu Dazai: III

Whenever the agency gets reached out with a certain case, it would be something along the lines of what the usual police couldn’t handle and on some instances we would collaborate with them for the more serious situations and It also means there would be more paperwork for the Agency to deal with *sigh*, and it’s no fun having to do nothing but that so I just don’t bother.

~

More About Osamu Dazai: IV

Why did I join the Armed Detective Agency? Well you’re pretty nosy aren’t you. It’s nothing special, but let’s just say that I joined because I’ve made a promise to someone long ago. I’d rather not have someone poking into my past like that so this is all the information you’ll get out of me.

~

More About Osamu Dazai: V

I always wonder what’s the value of living, what purpose do we need to serve in order to continue that. You seem to know what you want and by the time you get it, what now? As for me, well I’m just going through the motions and see what happens next and maybe I’ll find the reason I’m searching for

This is the best I could do, might edit this since I wrote this late at night

[gojokinni]

DAZAI ANALYSIS

Ok, so I actually thought a lot about posting something like this, because it would mean revealing a lot of personal stuff about me... However I felt like sharing my vision on Dazai, my favorite character, someone I relate to so much it hurts...

To start this character analysis, I'm actually going to analyze myself. Today I know that I am a deeply disturbed person, since I was in primary school and maybe before I was obsessed with sexual relations, I have no idea why, and to this day I don't know where it came from. All I know is that it led me to possess sexual trauma due to some "experiences" ( no r*pe, or pedophilia). One thing is sure,if I had to take my phone back in a hospital, I'd definitely be able to have a s*xual relationship for it.

I also have a severe lack of empathy. Which is weird since I'm a true emotional sponge... I will not understand how you feel, will not know how to comfort you, will not relate or put myself in your shoes. All of that is tiring to me, weird, I simply don't get it.

I was also probably one of the worst bully to ever exist, not physically but verbally. I never treated my "friends" fairly , was always bossy and mean. And you know what's the worst ? It's that I never realized it, not in the sense that I was young and didn't know better, but more like someone took over and talked instead of me. As if I was protecting myself. It made many people hate me and no matter what I do it'll always be like that.

Today, I have only 2 or 3 people I seem to genuinely care about and even then I really doubt they'd stay. I never really showed them who I was, always hiding behind sarcasm and self depreciating jokes.

Basically, I'm a weird mix between pragmatic and emotional. I can't function in society and will probably never be able to. Isolation, and solitude are what I dream of, not because I love these but because I can't seem to deal with others... Many would say I'm a psycho. I think I am.

That's where I relate to Dazai. I'm not a killer, I never tortured anyone, and while I was probably abusive mentally, I was never physically. However I get how he acts. Not having any morals, to be like a virus, someone so different from others that you could never integrate. You still try, because of diverse reasons, but even then you feel like it's not where you should really be.

Nobody knows who you are, firstly because you've always hidden yourself behind a different persona, but most importantly because you don't know yourself who you are. Everyday that passes, you feel empty, devoid of any things that make people's life interesting and bright.

Every time I see a rant post about how Dazai is a monster, it really makes me wanna cry, hide myself in my bed and never get out. Because it's me. Things are not as easy as :" oh he's a psycho, bad bad person". It's not that easy to act accordingly as everyone wants when you don't get it. I know that I could never come up to my ex-friends, look at them and say I'm sorry, just like how Dazai will never look at Akutagawa and say I'm sorry. Not because I'm heartless but because it won't get out. Even though I'm strong at lying, manipulating, even though I do that every day.

It's frustrating to not know who you are. To be a monster in everybody's eyes and even yours. Guess what, I'm deeply, disturbed, probably mentally ill, many would call me broken, and I already do it. I love Dazai, would defend him till the end of my life. He's my favorite character. Why ?

Because he's me.

[hannigramislife]

why do you hate dazai? (feel free to make a bulleted list if you feel like it) ❤️

Hey anon! Thanks for the ask ^^

Honestly, my entire blog now is full of reasons why I hate Dazai, but lets's get into a list of them.

He's a bitch. Also, he's a fake ass bitch.

He's so emotionally unavailable that he covers up everything, and you never know what he actually thinks.

He's annoying. I mean this in a "his personality actually is designed to get on your nerves" kind of annoying. A good portion of the time, he does it on purpose.

He's a lying liar.

He holds grudges as if he himself isn't the worst (ango deserves better than having to deal with dazai's bs)

He's manipulative. He somehow feels entitled to orchestrating other people's lives to what he deems acceptable. Examples: sskk and the entirety of Beast.

In addition, the way he treated Akutagawa in the mafia, but even more, the way he uses him now post-mafia, in his supposedly "good guy" era.

He never takes accountability for anything he does.

He is not honest to any of the people he claims to care about.

His personality - meaning his values, his habits, his choices, the way he behaves in his relationships - is made up of everything I myself can't fucking stand and I think I would throttle him if I knew him irl. Nothing to do with his crimes or what, just the way he looks at the world and how he behaves day to day makes me want to crawl out of my skin.

[kyouka-supremacy]

I've recently read the ch 84-88 of bsd and there's one thing i want to know, why did atsushi challenged akutagawa to not kill anyone during 6 months if he never believed that akutagawa could keep his promise about not killing ? What was going through atsushi head when he challenged akutagawa that way, did he want akutagawa not listen to him and fail?

That's a good question. Because chapter 85 proves that Atsushi did not believe Akutagawa would have been able to keep his promise; why bother asking, then? I suppose, in the end Atsushi thought it was worth giving it a try. He didn't believe in Akutagawa, but the fact that he challenged him demostrates that he wanted to be proved wrong. That he wanted Akutagawa to prove him wrong.

Atsushi - at least, at that point in the story - thinks very poorly of Akutagawa. Atsushi is judgemental, he thinks of Akutagawa as someone impulsive, stupid and small minded. But after they fought together, after they fused their abilities, after Atsushi had made himself defensless and vulnerable in front of Akutagawa and Akutagawa had done the same in turn... Atsushi didn't care for Akutagawa. Except that he did, at least more than he did before. So he's like: here's a tip. That's what Atsushi words are: a suggestion from a friend. They're not a challange, or an order, and they're only disguised as a deal, because there wasn't any reason for a deal to begin with, Akutagawa would have fought against him after six months either way. And Atsushi gives Akutagawa an advice, he tells him: there's some things that you aren't able to see, and that's why you're in pain. Here's what you can do to change that. In a way, Atsushi's words to Akutagawa in chapter 53 are the direct follow-up of his statement on the Moby Dick “If you asked me, I'd say Dazai-san has already recognized you long ago [but you can't see it]”. “Then you will come to the truth in its simplest form, and what you need for Dazai-san to acknowledge you. The fact that weakness and strength aren't as related as they appear to be [here's how to see it]”.

Let's add to that. Perhaps, Atsushi's willingness to give Akutagawa a chance was prompted by how close they went to knowing each other's ghosts during that mission, how much of themselves they opened up to the other. In that moment, for the first time in the whole story, Atsushi starts contemplating a tiny possibility of Akutagawa ever changing. Even though he doubted Akutagawa could make it, even though he knew there was a very slim chance Akutagawa would ever keep his word, for a fragment of second Atsushi still thought it was worth giving Akutagawa a chance¹. Atsushi is quick to judgement and full of preconceptions and doesn't often grant people the benefit of the doubt, but here for the very first time we can see him partially dropping his prejudices, which is so important to his personal growth. It's the first step towards trusting Akutagawa which will ultimately culminate in chapter 87 and them blindingly trusting each other in order to defeat Fukuchi, and later in chapter 107 with Atsushi fully trusting Akutagawa would never hurt him under normal circumstances and also with Atsushi offering himself as Akutagawa's meal without opposing much resistence. I mean. Sorry. It did kinda happen tho.

I don't think Atsushi made Akutagawa promise because he was hoping that he would have failed. I mean, if anything, Atsushi is strongly against people dying, so he would hope for Akutagawa to keep his promise only so that nobody would have had to lose their lives. The only instance of Atsushi hoping Akutagawa would break his promise could be, perhaps, on a subconscious level, hoping, in spite of himself, that Akutagawa would break the deal because that way they wouldn't have had to fight and kill each other, because deep down Atsushi doesn't want to kill Akutagawa. But this last one is quite a romanticized interpretation, ahah.

¹ Some very insightful considerations on Atsushi's willingness to change his view of Akutagawa were expressed in this great Atsushi analysis. I warmly recommend to give it a read!

[abromelon34105]

Snippet from Chapter 4 of my ADA!Chūya AU!! Sorry this one is a little heavier, there’s not many funny things in this chapter-

That’s when I realize his voice is just as dead as his eyes. I recall Akutagawa’s words from a few days ago. He was broken before you left, but your betrayal shattered what was left. Seems this is the downfall of my actions. And finally, I’m able to speak.

“Dazai…” It’s just one word, but it takes everything to say it. After trying to avoid his name and any thoughts with him for four years, it feels strange to say it. So many emotions are tied to that one word, and I’m struggling not to cry.

“I don’t have all day,” Dazai says in that same dead voice, and I know I don’t have much time. “I’m just…staking out…”

“Spying, more like.”

“Just…watching.”

“You were always a shit liar.” There’s a faint flicker of emotion in his eye, but it’s so faint I almost don’t see it. He grips my wrists tighter and I grimace under my breath, ignoring the discomfort flaring through my arms. “Why are you here?”

“I told you. And why do you care?”

“Because you’re incredibly close to my territory. When I’m passing through. And after what you did, I think I have reason to be suspicious.” The words sting. I know he probably hasn’t thought of us in that way in years, but the confirmation…I’m fighting tears at this point.

“Just recon. Just keeping an eye on your dealings.”

“Why would you care?”

“I don’t. But the President does.” Rage flickers in Dazai’s eye for a moment before calming again. “Akutagawa was right. You’re with the agency now. Out of all places, you went there.”

“They were the only ones who would take me.”

“I would have!” Dazai’s mask slips, and I get a glimpse at the broken man inside. His iris is pleading, close to tears, as he searches my eyes for something. His hands are shaking around my wrists, but he doesn’t move. “If you had just given me time-”

“You had five months,” I snap back, trying to keep my voice quiet. “For five months I asked you to stop. And you didn’t listen.”

“I was grieving-”

“And so was I! He was my friend too, Dazai! But I didn’t feel the need to destroy anyone that so much as made me even a little irritated! I was fine to let you grieve how you needed, but I asked you, begged you, to leave me out of it! To stop using me like that!” I’m close to tears now too, though Dazai’s mask is back up. Mostly. His hands are still shaking.

“I still needed to sort my feelings out,” he says coldly. “And you left me at my most vulnerable. All of this is your fault, Chūya.”

“Maybe if you hadn’t insisted on using my ability to destroy entire buildings all the time, maybe I wouldn’t have needed to take a knife to you.”