#also Thorin looks very hot in this

[must-be-mr-boggins]

I’m sick and can’t talk, but I’ll be d4mned if that stops me from posting Bagginshield trash.

[welikeimagines-andfandoms]

Accidental Confession- Thorin x Reader

Summary: Thorin overhears you confess your feelings about him to his nephews

Word count: 1, 478

Mixing yourself, two dwarf princes and a full barrel of mead was bound to create some chaos. Honestly after an hour of drinking with them you’re surprised that the worst thing you’d done was a failed handstand and a terrible improvised song. Unfortunately however things were going too smooth for too long, and your luck of only slightly embarrassing yourself was running out.

You and the princes were sat in the woods outside of Erebor, all three of you needing an escape from castle that could sometimes feel suffocating. Though you were only visiting your friends, you could tell they needed a break from their uncle, especially Fili as he was next in line and his list of duties were piling up every day. Needing the biggest break out of all three of you, it was no wonder that the embarrassing question came from him.

“Y/N, I have a question.” The blonde dwarf asked, sat upon a rock with a cheeky smile on his face.

“Well fortunately for you, Fili dear, I might just have the answer.” You reply with a cheeky smile of your own as Kili refills your cup.

“Why do you dislike our uncle?” Came Filis oddly sobering question.

This question caused even Kilis face to become serious as both princes stared at you. Although their faces were filled with worry, you couldn’t help the girlish grin that came to your face. At seeing your grin, both princes grew matching grins of their own.

“I don’t dislike your uncle.” You answer, trying hard and failing to hide your smirk.

“Oh really? When he speaks you seem to always walk away and just last night he asked you to dance and you denied him.” Kili now interrogates, a quizzical smile growing on his face.

“It’s not because I don’t like him.” You try to defend yourself sheepishly.

“Is it because you do like him then?” Fili asked you smirking.

“No! Maybe… Look it’s not fair! When he talks that dwarf language…”

“Khuzdul.” Kili quickly corrects.

“Yeh! It’s just really hot… I know he’s your uncle but it’s so hot! And and! The dancing! If I dance with your uncle my tits would be in his face! Which if that happened I’d get so turned on I’d die.” You confessed to your friends, babbling foolishly.

Fili and Kili exchange a look at hearing your confession, before promptly bursting out in laughter. Their laughter so loud that you’re sure people in Erebor could hear it.

“It’s not funny!” You half-laugh and half-shout, trying hard to stay serious and defend yourself, but unfortunately failing.

It wasn’t long until you too joined their laughter, all three of your laughs sounding loudly through the forest.

If any of you had been sober, you might have realised that such laughter had drawn the king under the mountain himself to find your little hiding spot. Seeing you all so intoxicated and in the forest he had half a mind to storm over and tell you all off, but was abruptly stopped at the conversation at hand.

“You should tell uncle how you feel!” Kili announced excitedly.

“No!” You shout.

“Why not?!” Both of your friends seemed to yell in unison.

“Oh yeh what would I say? ‘Hey Thorin, I know you’re the super duper important and serious king, but I think your voice is really sexy and the reason I don’t dance with you is because if your face was in my tits I’d get so horny I’d die! Also you’re really sweet to me and I’d like to hold your hand and bake you nice things and maybe kiss you a little’…” Your confession suddenly turning more sweet and serious.

Realising just how you felt about Thorin, your head fell as you played with your fingers, suddenly feeling very vulnerable and embarrassed.

“Maybe we should head back. It’s getting cold and I think it’s time we all went to bed. We’ll get you something nice to eat and some nice warm furs.” Fili suggests as he takes your hand, knowing your confession was a lot more than just a silly girl being attracted to their uncle.

As both boys held your hand to help you walk, Thorin hid himself behind a tree, not wanting to be noticed. Though he hid, he couldn’t help but stare at you as you left with his nephews. Knowing his feelings were reciprocated suddenly filled him with both relief and fear.

*****

You were surprised to wake up the next morning with only a mild hangover after your night of drinking with your friends. Getting dressed you decided it was a day for comfortable clothes, topped with a big warm cardigan knitted for you by Ori.

As you went to leave your room in search of food you literally ran into the last person you expected.

“Oh! Hello Thorin.” You sheepishly greeted him, slightly stepping back into your room.

“Good morning, y/n. How did you sleep?”

“Fine, thank you. Is there something I can help you with, Thorin?” You nervously ask him, trying hard to keep eye contact with him as you wrap the cardigan around yourself.

“Yes, um- may- may I come in? I’d like to speak with you in private.” He asked as his voice suddenly became more serious.

“Ye-yes, sorry, um, come in.” You anxiously step aside and quickly pull out a chair from your vanity for him to sit on while you sit on the edge of your bed.

Thorin manoeuvres the chair to sit directly in front of you, your knees barely grazing each other. Looking from your hands, to your barely touching knees and into his beautiful blue eyes, your gaze quickly falls back to your hands.

“I-I need to speak with you about last night.” Thorin stutters out.

Looking back into his eyes, you meet him with a quizzical look. The king under the mountain is never nervous and you had not spoken with him at all last night.

“I-I heard what you said to Kili and Fili last night.” He confesses.

Suddenly your eyes go wide as realisation hits you. At hearing this, your blood turns cold, both fear and embarrassment filling both your body and your face.

“Oh no.” You quietly mumble as you anxiously hide your face in your hands.

You were mortified and scrabbling your brain to think of anything to get him away, so you could wallow in shame and embarrassment alone. However before you could think of the words to save you, you felt large warm hands around yours, as Thorin pulled them away from your face.

“Please do not hide from me.” He gently soothes you, as his thumb runs across your fingers.

Your head shoots up at his comforting touch and words. Your eyes filled with panic, dart between your now joined hands and his kind eyes. Trying to look for pity in them but you did not find it.

“This was not how I had imagined telling you this but I suppose after last night I could not ignore my feelings anymore. Y/N, I care for you so deeply and think you are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen in my many years. I feared you would not feel the same as I am not of the race of man and am quite older than you, but from what I heard last night I’m guessing the feeling is some what mutual.” He smiles as he gazes lovingly into your eyes.

You were stuck, too many emotions holding you in place. Confusion, fear, embarrassment and maybe a little bit of love forcing you still and your eyes to never leave Thorins.

“Amrâlimê?” Thorin speaks, worry now in his eyes as he places his large warm hand on your cheek.

You can’t help but close your eyes and hum at the feel of his skin finally against yours. Placing your hand over his, you rub your face further into his hand.

“I suppose you were right about your reaction to me speaking in my native tongue.” Thorin teases you as his face comes closer to yours.

Your eyes fling open as you realise he truly did hear everything you said. Letting out a defiant chuckle, you decide to show him just how much you meant the words you said last night. Grabbing a hold of his coat with both hands, you forcefully pull him into you, as you press your lips passionately against his own.

Thorin moaned into your mouth as your hands desperately pulled at his hair and his squeezed at your hips. You couldn’t get enough of each others touch as you both pulled the other closer.

Finally breaking away, your foreheads rested against each other as you stared into each others eyes.

“Maybe we should try the dancing next.” Thorin teased you with a smirk and a wink.

[fizzyxcustard]

Those Hands.

Masterlist of fan fiction

Fandom: The Hobbit

Pairings: Thorin Oakenshield x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Insecurity, comparison, angst, sexual references, mutual pining, idiots in love.

Comments/Notes: From the imagine, "Imagine that Thorin is in love with you (from the race of Men) but constantly compares his body and features with other men, thinking you find him disgusting." Requested by multiple readers and anons. (THANK YOU!)

I hope you like the fic. As always, like, reblog and comment if you enjoy. If you wish to be added to any of my tag lists, let me know.

Thorin watched every little interaction that you had with other males, whether they be Dwarves, Men or Elves. He couldn’t help but watch you blush, avert eye contact and use self-soothing gestures, such as touching your face, curling your hair with your fingers, or rubbing your upper arms. 

Since Thorin had been crowned King of Erebor, and re-building was underway, many people visited the mountain. Bard came from Esgaroth, often meeting with Thorin in council, to discuss trade deals and assistance in building. Much to Thorin’s distain, Thranduil of the Woodland Realm, also came. Again, he joined the council to converse around the subject of trade deals in precious metals and gemstones.  

Your relationship with Thorin was entirely built on trust. The two of you had been companions out on the road during the quest to re-take Erebor. He had always valued your opinion, spoke with you in private, and kept you close to him on his council of advisors. Erebor was now your home, despite you being of the race of Men. Your family were all gone, meaning that the Dwarves had now taken that place, welcoming you into the fold and treating you as one of their own. 

One morning, council was busy. Neldra, one of the kitchen staff, was on hand with jugs of cold drinks and pots of tea. Then once all the drinks were laid out neatly on intricately laced doilies, she came back with a trolley of fresh pastries. 

The smell was divine; you took an inhale and let the scent overtake you. Apple and cinnamon were among the selection: your favourite. 

You reached out to take one of the pastries, only to feel another hand graze yours. “I apologise,” a voice came, from the direction of the hand. 

It was Bard, from two seats down to your right hand side, who had stretched across to grab one of Neldra’s famous delicacies. “It was no bother,” you replied. “You first.” 

“Ladies first. I insist.” 

Thorin’s blue eyes studied the scene going on before him. No one else had noticed the exchange between you and Bard. Upon the impact of yours and Bard’s hands, Thorin felt a jolt in his chest. It rose up into his throat, and he closed his eyes for a brief second. The red hot sensation bore into him, feeling as if it were forming a hole straight through him. Upon opening his eyes, Thorin looked at his hands, then glanced across to Bard’s. The man’s hands were broad, but his fingers long and slender. Very much unlike Thorin’s. The Dwarf King’s fingers were short and bulky, with stubby ends. Surely Bard’s hands would have the dexterity and skill to caress your skin, drawing shivers from you. A Dwarf’s hands would be too calloused and thick to evoke any kind of pleasurable sensation upon a woman from the race of Men. 

Chatter continued, along with eating and drinking. In that time, Thorin tried his hardest to push the negative thoughts from his mind, and concentrate on the conversation at hand, which involved the realms of Erebor and Esgaroth exchanging skilled workers and apprentices. 

Thranduil was also present and merely rolled his eyes as the conversation got underway between Bard and Thorin. The Elven King did not like to waste his time, and being in this council meant that there were stints of time where his input was not needed. 

“Would you like another drink?” you asked Thranduil, picking up the nearest china pot of tea. 

“I would much prefer wine, but since I’m not within my realm, I would not say no.”

Thorin’s gaze darted over to Thranduil, and then to you. He saw you brush a piece of hair behind your ear, and then look up at the Elven King sat opposite you. Your ears were small, with one golden hoop earring in each lobe. Then Thorin looked at Thranduil’s ears; pointed at the tip, finely structured. They weren’t big, round and sticking out. Thorin’s ears were ugly, and thankfully he could keep them hidden under his long hair. Secretly, he had always imagined you whispering against them, your lips brushing them. It made Thorin shiver. 

Once council had concluded, Thorin left the chamber and headed back to the royal wing. Once inside and he stood in front of his full length dress mirror, staring at the protruding ears on the side of his head. Then he studied his large hands, thinking back to Bard’s. 

The males from the races of Men and Elves made you blush in a way that Thorin never had. Their bodies were more finely crafted, which complemented yours. They had finer features with smaller noses and brows. 

Thorin shifted back and sat on his bed, his hands in his lap. He took one more glance at them, feeling disgusted at what he saw. They would never be good enough for you. None of his body would ever be good enough for you. Everything about him was oversized, not delicate and handsome like Bard and Thranduil. Both of them had lost their wives, and may have wished to re-marry, so they would make better husbands for you. 

***

The following day and Thorin was sat in the council room, signing documents. His quill scratched loudly against the parchment. 

You walked in, holding a further stack of documents in your hands. “These should be the last ones,” you said, offering a smile. 

Thorin looked up at you. No blush on your face to be seen. 

“Is everything alright?” you asked. There was something in his eyes, a thoughtfulness. Maybe even a sadness. You sat down in an empty seat next to Thorin. “What’s wrong?” On impulse, you placed your hand on top of his. 

Thorin looked at your hands, watching your thumb gently caress his knuckle. How huge his hand looked against yours. But how right it felt, as if the size did not matter, and they were still able to fit together as one. 

“There is nothing wrong,” Thorin said, forcing a weak smile. “I hear that Bard is leaving this afternoon. Will you not be wishing him farewell?” 

“I barely know him,” you replied. “I’d feel it strange to do so.” 

“Would you wish to get to know him?” 

“I don’t know. Why do you ask?”

“Surely you find him handsome,” Thorin continued, pulling the new stack of documents over towards him. 

“Not really. Can’t say I do. There’s some reason to you asking this, Thorin.” 

“Why would I have any reason?” 

“There’s always a reason to anything that you ask. I know you enough by now. Talk to me. You’ve always given me more trust than I deserve, and never questioned me liked this before.” 

Thorin took a deep inhale and looked at you, dropping his quill. “Who do you find handsome? If not Bard, maybe Thranduil?” 

You couldn’t help but laugh. “Why ever would you think I’m attracted to King Thranduil?” The whole idea was so comical that you couldn’t help but keep giggling. “It takes….” You couldn’t stop the giggling. “A special….kind of woman….to…..” 

Thorin also began to chuckle, watching your face turn red in amusement and delight. His heart somehow felt lighter as he watched you, and that overwhelming love for you rose. It was a love that would allow him to do anything to make you happy. It was a love that would make him sacrifice his very life to keep you safe. It was sacrificial and unconditional. 

You could see the glow in Thorin’s eyes and the smile which curled his lips upwards. He was the one you found handsome, above all others. The intensity in his eyes made butterflies swarm in your stomach. His proud presence caused you to shiver whenever he entered a room. His voice was enough to make your imaginations travel to another place where only the two of you were, locked away in comfort, pursuing wondrous pleasure. 

You edged closer to Thorin. “You said you want to know who I find handsome?” 

Thorin’s heart was hammering now and he was sure that you would be able to hear it. 

“It’s you.” Your voice was a whisper. “It’s always been you. How could it not be you? Why would you ever think I’d be attracted to Bard and Thranduil?” 

Thorin closed his eyes in embarrassment. “My features and body are not like theirs.” 

“So why would that not make you handsome?” 

“My hands…” 

“Your hands?” you giggled. This time a blush did hit your cheeks, and it was even more vivid than it had ever been when in the company of any other man. “You have found out my secret.” 

“What secret?” Thorin asked, shifting ever so slightly closer to you. He had never wanted you any more than he did in those moments. The very thought that it was him that you found handsome was making his whole being rise, but anticipation was now racing down his spine in shivers. 

“I have had a fantasy for some time now, since meeting you, of what you could do to me with those hands,” you said, biting your lip. 

Thorin couldn’t hold back any more and moved even closer to you, his hand cupping your cheek. His breath was elevated and his eyes were sparkling with so much joy, but slight fear. 

His lips crashed against yours and you both groaned upon impact. Within seconds and the kiss had grown deep, your tongues both meeting. You couldn’t help but whimper as Thorin’s lips left yours and trailed down your neck. His beard tickled your skin and then as he grew more impatient, you could feel the tickle become a bristling, sharp sensation. Your hands became lost in his hair as he nuzzled at your neck, groaning and grunting. 

Thorin felt your fingertips brush over his ears, and it drew an overwhelming shiver from his very core. 

“I love you, Thorin,” you said again. “Now show me what you can do with those hands.” 

***

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[dumbassunderthemountain]

Terrible Braiding (Revamped) Thorin x Reader

The First fic in My Dumbass Revamp Event, revamping the first fic I ever wrote! 

Summary: Every morning you and Thorin braid each other’s hair, the only problem? You’re absolutely terrible at hair braiding  (Original)

Word Count: 905 

Warnings: none 

Since you and Thorin were married eight months ago the two of you had fallen into a sweet morning routine. The two of you would wake up earlier than any living creature should wake (in your person opinion, Thorin, the traitor, seemed perfectly content with the early hour). Luckily a very large hot cup of coffee and a cup of black tea were delivered by the kitchen and always waited outside the bedroom door. After wiggling out of your arms Thorin would grab the tea and coffee before bringing it to bed. There he set his tea down on his marble nightstand before waving the coffee in front of you, allowing its scent to waft into your nose and eventually bribe your still half-asleep mind into a sitting position. You’d drink your coffee and tea while discussing a bit about the coming day, not so much all the meetings and royal duties, but the enjoyable things. Today for example, you scheduled a meeting with Ori and Balin for some more Dwarvish history lessons, which Ori always made both informative and fun. Thorin on the other hand was simply glad that you would also be attending his first meeting of the day.  

After the much-needed caffeine, you would be barely willing to get out of your warm bed and get dressed. The two of you had decided to forgo dressing servants and instead opted to help each other each day. Considering his comparatively simple outfits this mostly consisted of him helping you with all the laces on your dresses and corsets. Next came the hair. For the dwarves doing each other's hair every morning was traditional amongst married couples, as hair was sacred to them and their identities. Thorin always put in your marriage braid first, then continued to style the rest of your long (h/c) into some elaborate style, that you swore was different every single day. You on the other hand could do a simple three strand braid, and even that sometimes cause you difficulties. Therefore, the complicated Dwarvish marriage braid was a struggle… every morning.  

Keeping each chunk of hair separate always seemed impossible, it would tangle together repeatedly, and once it was untangled, you had completely forgotten which piece crossed over the next. Thorin did his best to help and give you directions as he intently watched your clumsy hands in the mirror, but there was only so much he could do. According to dwarven tradition it was important that each spouse braided the others hair on their own. You were getting better. Thorin’s hair no longer looked like nothing more than a tangled mess, but your skills had not improved enough to be even close to ‘appropriate’ by high dwarven society. Thorin always patted your hands telling you not to worry, but that was impossible when you could see the snide looks of many of the nobles. Nevertheless, every day Thorin went out into the kingdom proudly dawning your terrible marriage braid.  

You pulled back your hands from his hair, “Another day, another terrible braid,” you attempted to laugh, running your hand along the rough braid. 

“I love your braids, ghivashel. The whole kingdom can see that I am clearly yours”, Thorin leaning forward to kiss you. 

“Yes, all the dwarrowdams in the kingdom can clearly see that you ‘married an inept human who cannot even figure out a simple marriage braid.’” Thorin raised his brow, questioning your statement. Looking down you explained, “I’m only quoting what the dwarrowdams tell me.” Putting your hands up in defense. Without looking you could feel the sadness and disappointment in his expression. It was one of the things you fell in love with, the fact that he understood just how different dwarvish and human culture could be and was incredibly patient as you learned. 

Thorin placed his finger under your chin, gently guiding you to meet his eyes. “Well, you should not listen to them. I think your braiding is beautiful, even if it’s not a ‘well done’ marriage braid according to all my people’s technical standards. It is unique to the two of us, making it a great treasure.” He leaned closer, lowering his voice, “And, luckily for you, my dearest, my opinion as the king and your husband is the only one that matters.” Thorin says, smugly smiling and pulling you close. 

“Okay, you just keep telling yourself that Your Majesty,” lightly kissing his nose and slipping away, jokingly scoffing at his loving yet playful smugness as you leave your warm bedroom for the cold vaulted halls of Erebor. 

As two of you walk into the first meeting of the day internally dreading a long boring discussion about grain storage and distribution for the coming winter, you were loudly to be greeted by Dwalin’s exclamation, “Mahal’s balls! Thorin, what is that hideous thing hanging from your face?!”   

“Oh, hush” you tell Dwalin trying to still seem queenly in the midst of this embarrassment, your face turning as red as a ruby. You knew Dwalin was joking but there were so many respectable dwarrow in the room you could not help it.  

“There is nothing ‘hideous’ hanging from my face. There is only my family braid and my beautiful marriage braid that was put in by my wonderful wife and Queen, Master Dwalin.” Thorin responded with a proud smile, giving a majestic hair flip to the counsel and pulling you closer to him. 

💚💚💚💚💚

If you would like to be on the taglist for this short little writing event please let me know, as for now I'll just tag the three people I tagged in my last Thorin fic.

Taglist: @fizzyxcustard @shiinata-library @lathalea

[sweetbutpsychobutsweet]

Smoke, Iron, and Thorin

Chapter 1

Thorin Oakenshield x Fem!Reader

Summary: you prepare for the quest to reclaim Erebor by meeting your kin in the home of a very disgruntled hobbit. However, you don't expect to face your first obstacle before you even step foot out the door, when an unexpected ghost from your past darkens the door of the hobbit hole.

Warnings: eventual smut, no use of y/n, angst

Word count: 1833

Author's note: This is my FIRST fic! The beginnings of this story have been sitting in my computer for sooo long and for whatever reason today I just decided to jump headfirst into being a Tumblr writer! I'm still very new to this, so I welcome all kinds of constructive feedback/criticism. If there are any warnings/tags you think I missed just let me know :) Reader is AFAB! half dwarf/half human, but still grew up in the halls of Erebor. We'll get more into her background and her history with Thorin later on in the series! Enjoy!

“What do you think they’ll have?” Filli asks with giddy excitement as they pass each hobbit hole on their way through the shire.

“what do you mean?” you ask absentmindedly, scanning each door for the symbol Gandalf instructed you to look for.

“For supper of course,” Killi replies. “He said there would be lots of food, and no one can cook quite like a hobbit can.” you can’t deny the intoxicating aroma that has seeped into your nose with every inhale since the moment you arrived in the shire. Freshly baked bread, patiently cured meats, and hearty stews seem to be baking all around you as the sun finishes its descent behind the lush rolling hills of the shire.

Darkness has settled all around as the inhabitants of the hobbit holes settle in for the evening. The only remaining light comes from the lamps illuminating the doorways and the warming hearths inside every cozy little hole.

“I see it!” You shout triumphantly when you glimpse the blue mark glowing on the green door of a hobbit hole.

The two dwarves are so anxious for a hot meal that they’ve already bounded up to the door to ring the bell before you can even blink.

The front door is pulled open abruptly and a very frustrated hobbit groans at the sight of you. A reaction that is not all that uncommon while traveling with dwarves, so the three of you greet him enthusiastically regardless.

“You must be Mr. Boggins,” Kili begins.

“Nope!” the hobbit shouts, ��you can’t come in, you’ve come to the wrong house!” he tries and fails to close the door on the three of you.

“What?!” you all shout in confusion. Knowing there is absolutely no way you are at the wrong door.

“Has it been canceled? No one told us.” the brothers protest. 

“No, nothing’s been canceled,” the hobbit starts to explain.

You all sigh in relief and continue to push your way further inside.

The home is filled with the overlapping chatter of dwarves and the clattering of weapons being tossed into the arms of the frazzled hobbit.

Dwalin’s booming voice greets the three of you, quickly recruiting you all to join in the organized chaos that is preparing the cramped dining room for even more dwarves to arrive. 

Food is tossed about, ale sloshed onto the floor, and poor Bilbo’s house is an absolute wreck. You can’t help but feel sorry for your host, but you also can’t bring yourself to pull away from the merriment just yet.

It had been so long since you’d last been around so many of your dwarven friends. Up until beginning your journey several weeks ago, you hadn’t even seen Kili and Fili for many years. 

But their mother, Dis had always been a very good friend of yours. Ever since growing up Erebor, you had felt as closely connected to her family as she was to yours. 

Unfortunately, due to the arrival of a dragon, and stubborn dwarvish pride you had long ago gone your separate ways. Save for the occasional letter. Much like the letter you received asking if you would be willing to accompany her two reckless sons on their latest journey.

Kili and Fili were not exactly known for their self-preservation instincts and the journey that lay before you would not be an easy one. But even if it weren’t as a favor to Dis, you would have said yes regardless. Nothing in the world would be able to prevent you from helping to finally reclaim your homeland, and defeat the great beast that took so much from you.  

Several pints of ale have loosened your inhibitions and you now find yourself laughing and singing along with the rowdy bunch, not a care in the world.

Until a heavy knock comes on the door.

Silence falls over the hobbit hole.

“He’s here,” says Gandalf.

“Who’s here?” you ask in confusion.

No answer comes, and everyone is suddenly averting their gaze from yours as Gandalf crosses the room to open the door. You have a bad feeling about what’s on the other side.

Gandalf pulls it open with a flourish and is greeted by a deep voice. A familiar voice.

No, you think to yourself. It can’t be.

But sure enough, Thorin Oakenshield is stepping through the front door. 

He says something to Gandalf but you can’t fully make out what it is.

Your ears are ringing loudly and a white, hot flame is blazing deep inside your belly.

Suddenly you’re back to the last time you saw him, years ago. Tears streaming down your cheeks in the doorway of the dusty old inn.

“He looks more like a grocer than a burglar,” Thorin laughs as he turns towards the dining room. Where his eyes immediately lock with yours. You can see the exact moment he realizes you’re there. His eyes widen in shock and your name slips past his lips in a breathless whisper. 

For what feels like the longest second of your life, he simply stands there taking you in. From the braided strands framing your face to the silhouette of your long green traveling dress. You could almost swear he looked…happy to see you. 

And that only adds more fuel to the fire inside you. 

“Thorin,” you growl and curl your fists at your side. “What are you doing here?” you hiss.

He narrows his eyes back at you. “What am I doing here? I am the leader of this company, what are you doing here? It isn’t safe for you, lass.”

You scream in frustration. The sexist pig! You have just as much of a right to be here as everyone else and he knows it. Your arm reaches up of its own accord to smack that self-righteous look right off his face. But before your hand can make contact Fili grabs your arm and pulls you away.

You whirl around and shove him away from you.

“You!” you glare between Kili and Fili redirecting your anger. “You lied to me!” they both start to protest but before they can form a single sentence you hold up a finger and they both fall silent. 

“You told me, he wouldn’t be here! You looked me right in the eyes and lied to my face,” you grind out, barely containing the urge to strike them both upside the head.

“We didn’t want to,” Fili begs.

“It was our mother’s idea, she knew that was the only way you would agree to come.” Kili finishes.

You laugh humorlessly. “And she was absolutely right, I’m leaving!” you turn on your heel and march straight towards the door. But before you can fully push past him, Thorin’s hand encircles your wrist and firmly pulls you back to look at him.

It was a mistake letting yourself stand any closer to him. As soon as you do his scent envelopes you. Smoke, iron, and Thorin. You yank stubbornly on his grip, desperate to put some distance between the two of you but he is too strong. 

“Wait,” he whispers to you, both commanding and desperate. “You cannot make the journey back alone, it is already dark, who knows what is lurking along those roads-”

You scoff and reach your free hand behind you for the dagger concealed underneath your corset. Before he can continue you have it pressed firmly against his throat. You apply just enough pressure that you know he can feel the blade stinging against his skin, but he doesn’t even blink. You lean in closer to him looking deep into his eyes.

“I can take care of myself,” you whisper. “I’ve had a lot of practice at it as of late.” And he loosens his grip just enough for you to yank yourself free. You remove the dagger from his throat and attempt to resume your departure, but this time it is Gandalf who stands in your way.

“I am sorry we misled you, my dear. But I’m afraid we cannot accomplish this task without you.” you lift the dagger up defiantly and point it at his chest, but you both know it is an empty threat.

“I don’t care,” you reply. “It’s not my problem.”

“You do, and it is,” the wizard replies. “I know how you’ve spent the last years, you are the only one who possesses the knowledge and connections we need to accomplish this feat.” 

You hear the whispers of confusion from behind you. They clearly didn’t know how you had dedicated the last several years of your life to searching, reading, and studying every resource you could get your hands on in preparation for this exact task.

“I know how badly you wish to return home,” Gandalf continues, as if he could read your mind. “A great deal was taken from you that day, and you are not the type to let that stand. So the question remains: who deserves your wrath more at this moment? Thorin or Smaug?”

You let your arm fall back to your side, tucking the dagger back away.

“Who says it can’t be both?” you challenge him.

Gandalf laughs and shakes his head.  

“Oh you are part dwarf indeed my child. Hold onto whatever anger you wish. But don’t let it get in the way of you reclaiming your homeland, defeating Smaug, and finally laying your parents to rest.”

You clench your jaw in frustration. You know he’s right, but you hate to admit it.

“We can do this without her,” Thorin grumbles from behind you. “If she wishes to leave she can, I’ll have someone escort her home safely.” 

You finally whirl around to glare at him again. He doesn’t want you here, he doesn’t think you can do it. He doesn’t think a ‘helpless girl’ can hold her own on a dangerous journey such as this one.

You smirk back at him defiantly. 

“On second thought,” you place one hand on your hip and extend the other out toward Balin. “I’ll sign that contract now,”

Thorin grumbles and glares at you in protest. 

Balin moves faster than you’ve ever seen the dwarf move, handing you the contract before you can change your mind or Thorin can argue against it. 

You scribble your name at the bottom and shove it into Thorin’s chest as you saunter past him in search of another pint of ale.

You lost count of how many more drinks you downed before passing out in one of the soft armchairs by the fire. 

You stir briefly when a familiar scent meets your nose and a thick blanket is gently draped across your sleeping form.

You could swear you feel the whisper of a touch ghost across your cheek, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. 

But before you can wake any further, a deep voice starts to sing:

Far over the misty mountains cold…

More voices start to join in the melody, and before you know it you are lulled deeper and deeper back into a dreamless sleep.

Next Chapter

[mlmxreader]

Nsfw alphabet with

Fili

Kili

Thorin

Bard

Legolas

And Aragorn?

I know it's a lot of them so sorry lskdxhcjdj

I'm just... Pretty men...

these are all done with a gn!reader

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT

A=Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Fili is so gentle and sweet with you, he'll hold you tight and he'll kiss your forehead and get you whatever you need; he can be so rough and so calloused, but he cares deeply, and his care does not end at just a quick cuddle. Kili is sweet, but he doesn't hesitate to make you laugh, either; you might be breathless and a little exhausted, but he'll still get a laugh or two out of you. He loves the sound of it, especially when he knows he's just fucked your brains out. Thorin is careful and cautious with you, treating you like the most fragile of gemstones; he trusts you to tell him if there's anything that you need or want from him, but he's also very touchy - always kissing and cuddling you. Bard is tender, and more affectionate than anything else; he's very sweet and gentle with you, but he's also so, so touchy. He won't leave your side at all, and insists that you sleep as the little spoon every time - he likes to look after you, and even more, he likes to know that you're aware he's enjoying it. Legolas is kind, and always verbalises his praises and his affections for you; he's very keen on ensuring that you're always on the softest of his pillows and wrapped up in all of his blankets - especially the silk and fur ones. Whatever you want, you get. Aragorn is quiet, he likes to hold you close and to whisper sweet nothings to you whilst also gently running his hand up and down your arm; if you ask him for anything, whether it's tobacco or a hot bath, he will get it for you without a single word.

B=Body Part (Their favorite body part of their partners)

Fili adores your back, he loves nothing more than to continuously run his hands up and down as he feels every bone and every muscle; how the skin glistens and glitters with your sweat and, occasionally, his cum. Kili loves your neck most of all, how sensitive the skin there is and how wonderful it looks when it's covered in the marks of his mouth and hands; he loves to wrap his hand around your throat and feel your pulse. Thorin's favourite body part of yours is your ass; he loves how tight and warm it is and how snugly his cock fits into you as you push back against him. He adores how your asshole clenches around him and how eagerly you take every inch of his. Bard loves your hands, and how your fingers seem to be made to interlock with his; he can never resist holding your hands every time he fucks you, just as he can never resist how much he loves it when you trace his jaw. Legolas adores nothing more than your lips; he loves to feel them wrapped around his cock as much as he loves how they feel against their own. All the soft and sweet whines that he can draw from your lips with every stroke of his cock. Aragorn is in awe of your eyes, especially how they lock with his whenever you ride him; he hates it when you close your eyes when you cum, but the grin upon your lips when you gasp out his name is a good enough compromise.

C=Cum (Anything to do with cum basically)

Fili loves to cum on your back; admiring the streaks of white against your skin as he groans softly, almost praying your name. He'll scoop it onto his thick fingers and make you lick and suck them clean, constantly praising you as he does. Kili prefers to cum on your face, watching you eagerly gather it on your fingers and smear it over your features with a bright grin; he adores to cum on your face, especially if there's a risk that you could be caught. Thorin's favourite place to cum is in your ass; he loves to breed it and to stuff you until you're whimpering and whining, pulling back as he watches how his cum leaks from you. He could spend all day cumming in your tight, warm asshole. Bard is quite traditional, he likes to cum in your asshole every time he can; he doesn't mind cumming on your stomach or in your mouth, either, but it's a rare occasion that he ever does, often reserved for quickies. Legolas likes to cum in your mouth; he likes to watch you swallow as much as you can, especially if there's a bit too much and it leaks onto your bottom lip and down your chin. Such a sight he'll never forget, and it always makes him grin. Aragorn prefers to cum in your ass as much as he can, but he also doesn't mind it when you ask him to cum somewhere else; he's happy to cum wherever, really, as long as you ask him beforehand. Aragorn isn't massively picky, especially when there's little time to be had.

D=Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory)

Fili's dirty secret is that he loves to watch you masturbate in front of him; he adores it, how your head tilts back and you try to make your quiet moans silent as they slip from your tongue. How you try and make your hand go as quickly as possible, desperate for relief. Kili will never admit to it, but he loves having his hair pulled; lace your fingers into the thick hair at the back of his head, tilting his head back to force him to look at you, and he'll almost cum on the spot. Thorin's secret is that he actually likes it when you ride him on his throne; the cold stone against your heated skin as you fuck yourself on his cock, whimpering and whining his name. Anyone could walk in, and see you so needy for your King. Bard won't ever say it, but he loves it when you cockwarm him; lying in bed together on lazy mornings with his cock in your ass and your back pressed firmly to his chest. The occasional movement from your hips making him bite his lip as he tries not to moan. Legolas has never told anyone, but he gets turned on whenever you wear his clothes; it could be something as simple as his shirt, and he'll have to resist the urge to palm at his cock and quietly ask for you to join him in the bedroom. Aragorn secretly gets turned on every time you spar with him; pin him down with your crotch so close to his face that you can feel his breath, and he's already weak in the knees. Needy and wanting as any man could ever be.

E= Experience (How experienced are they?)

Fili is very experienced, he's had a lot of sexual partners over the years and he's quite well versed in just about everything; there's still a few things that you have to explain to him, but he's otherwise very knowledgeable. Kili isn't super experienced, but he knows what he's doing most of the time; you might have to talk through a few things here and there, but he's willing to try just about anything with you should the time and place be right. Thorin has had many, many sexual partners; he's tried a little bit of everything and there's nothing that he isn't at least understanding of. He's had a lot of time, and been to a lot of places, enough to know more than the average being does. Bard isn't the most experienced, but he's also not the least, either; he knows a fair amount, but don't be surprised if you bring up a certain kink and he needs you to explain it to him. He definitely knows how to satisfy his partner, though. Legolas doesn't have a tonne of experience, he needs you to explain quite a fair bit, but he knows the basics and enough to be able to satisfy you when you need him to; for someone who isn't the most experienced in the world, he's still very good. Aragorn has far, far more experience than most people expect; he'll actually shock you the first time that you sit down and talk to him about kinks, as he needs no explanation about anything and has tried just about everything there is.

F= Favorite Position

Fili loves doggy style; having you face down and ass up will always be his favourite, and he'll never deny it, either. He'll often put his hand on the back of your neck to keep you in position, or he'll hold onto your sides with an iron grip. Kili's favourite will always be having you bent over the side of the bed with your hands clutching the mattress; he likes the access that it gives him, and loves how easy it is for you to push back against him when he fucks you. Thorin will always be an ass man, so whatever position means he gets to see, hold and feel your ass is his favourite; he's by no means picky otherwise, but he is also quite keen on having you ride him with your hands on his shoulders and your face pressed to his neck. Bard loves to have you on your side with your back against his chest, one arm wrapped firmly around you so he can feel every breath and moan and whimper that leaves you; especially if it's a cold day, he loves fucking you on your side on the bed. Legolas likes it best when he can press you up against something, fucking you stood up with your hands by your face, leaving condensation on whatever it is he's fucking you against. He definitely prefers it against windows, though. Aragorn's favourite will always be when you ride him; your hands on his chest and your face pressed to his neck, legs either side of him as you softly moan and grumble his name. His arms wrapped around you tightly.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc.)

Fili is quite serious, although he's been known to crack a joke here and there; it's often unexpected, and you'll have to pause to laugh as you try to get back into it. He's by no means the most serious at all, but he isn't often humorous. Kili can be very humorous, and he does often make jokes whenever and wherever he can; he loves to see you smile while he's fucking you, and he adores it when hears you laugh and giggle along with his jokes, too. Thorin is dead serious, and you will never hear him make a joke during sex, ever; he compliments you and teases you a lot, and he'll always find a way to make you smile during sex, but he doesn't ever make jokes. Bard can go either way, depending on the day; sometimes, he's very humorous and makes you laugh until you have to stop and catch your breath, other times, he'll all about just fucking you until you're whimpering and cockdrunk. Legolas is quite humorous; he does tease and crack jokes and make you smile and laugh as he giggles. He adores giggly sex with you, and always finds an excuse to make every session as giggly as he can. Aragorn is gentle, but he's also quite serious; he likes to focus on your pleasure above all else, and he is certainly a man on a mission and will do anything he can to complete it. He's very sweet, though, he's always praising you and encouraging you.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Fili is VERY well kept; the thick blond curls are so well looked after, you're certain that if he could, he would braid his pubic hair. They're quite long, too, but they're also very soft as well; although it still tickles when you go down on him. Kili is well groomed enough; he trims his pubic hair when it gets too much, but he does take as best care as he can. The hairs are dark and thick, fairly long but also very coarse; he does try, but sometimes he's not able to keep up the maintenance. Thorin is extremely well groomed; his pubic hair is long and thick and dark, but also coarse, very tidy, and styled as best as possible; it bleeds into the trail of hair going up his stomach, but is by no means messy or unkempt. Bard isn't groomed. At all. His pubic hair has never been touched and is a long, shaggy, coarse black bush; he keeps his pubic hair clean, but he doesn't see why anyone cares about the length or anything else. Besides, it suits him. Legolas is also extremely well groomed; his pubic hair is a thick, long bush of platinum blond, almost white. It doesn't bleed up to his stomach, as he keeps everything from the waist up shaved down. But it is long enough that it tickles your nose when you go down on him. Aragorn isn't groomed. Whatsoever. He doesn't care about such a trivial and frivolous thing, but he keeps the hair nice and clean; it's dense and thick, just like the hair on his stomach and his chest. Dark and coarse, the hair suits him.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect)

Fili is very intimate, expect a lot of little touches and softly checking in on you, as well as a lot of praise and compliments; Fili cares deeply, and he needs you to know that he does, even when you're grunting and moaning. Kili is intimate in the way that he likes to make you laugh and to hear you actually laugh along with him during sex; it reminds you both that you're there for one another, and that he will always try and his best by you. Thorin is very intimate; expect him to be constantly touching you, kissing you, reminding you how much he loves you, how lucky he is to have you. Expect a lot of verbal affirmations, more than anything, but also expect a lot of physical ones, too. Bard is always romantic; he loves you dearly, and always makes it as known as he possibly can. He cherishes you, and whether he affirms that verbally or physically, he always makes it known either way. He adores you, and treats you as such. Legolas can go either way; when the two of you are having sex, he likes it to be giggly and to laugh a lot, in which case, it's always very intimate. But during quickies, Legolas isn't particularly intimate, and neither are you. Aragorn is always intimate; he will always be romantic and gentle with you, no matter the circumstances. Even if it's just a quickie, expect him to still be loving and kind and affirming of his care for you - however he can.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Fili rarely masturbates, but that's mostly because he doesn't have the time or the privacy in order to do so; on the very rare occasion that he does, however, he always pictures you and thinks about you as he gets himself off. Usually moaning your name as he cums. Kili masturbates as often as he can; it's a good stress reliver, and he doesn't like being pent up, so if he can find the opportunity, he will always take it. He will picture you on your knees with his cum all over his face, gasping your name softly as he cums from his hand. Thorin rarely, rarely masturbates; if he ever does, it's usually because you're not around and he's been pent up for a long while. It happens maybe once or twice in a blue moon, and when it does, he never finds it as good as the real thing; he never finds it as good as you. Bard masturbates occasionally; it's not rare, but it's not common. Usually it's because he's away from home and he's been thinking about you; all alone, he'll make sure he's in a spot he won't get caught when he does eventually jack off. Picturing you in bed with him, cumming as you moan his name. Legolas doesn't usually need to masturbate, as he is with you so often that he never really feels the need for it; but there have been a few times here and there that he has - he likes to picture you sucking him off, the feeling of your warm, wet mouth and your lips around his cock. Aragorn never masturbates. He's never felt the need to, and doesn't really ever want to, either; he'll happily watch you do it in front of him, though, and it will often end with you riding him as you breathlessly whisper his name against his ear.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Fili - praise, mutual masturbation, edging. Kili - hair pulling, marking, teasing. Thorin - bondage, choking, praise. Bard - breeding, cockwarming, spanking. Legolas - exhibitionism, outdoor sex, edging. Aragorn - praise, watching you masturbate, free use.

L = Location (Favorite places to do the do)

Fili - the bedroom. Kili - the bedroom and the kitchen. Thorin - the throne room. Bard - the bedroom and on his boat. Legolas - anywhere with a window. Aragorn - outside.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Fili is easily turned on by you; bend over in front of him and show off your ass to him. Pretend to look for something by getting on all fours and parading yourself in front of him. Even just sitting on his lap and moving your hips the slightest bit gets him more than eager and ready. Kili is very, very easily motivated; pin him down beneath you as you're making out with him, and he'll be ready in seconds. Wear clothing that's a little bit too tight around your ass, or a little bit too revealing and he'll be pulling you aside as soon as he can. Thorin isn't very easily motivated, but he's also not difficult, either; if you're walking around in next to nothing or you're acting up and being a brat, that always gets him going quite a fair amount - but so does sitting on his lap and squirming around, or purposefully flirting with someone else right in front of him. Bard is quite well motivated; flirt with him and tease him enough, and that should be enough. But he also gets turned on when you press your ass to his cock as you're cuddling him, and when you're being a bit of a tease by running your hands over his body and complimenting him. Legolas is easily turned on. Even just the sight of you wearing his clothes, or the sight of the buttons of your shirt revealing part of your chest, is enough to make him hot under the collar and ready to go; he's easy. Aragorn is quite difficult to get going; he's got a lot of patience, and a lot of self control, so it can be quite hard work. One thing that is always guaranteed, though, is when you pin him down during sparring and your crotch is against his face - that never fails to get him going.

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Fili - humiliation. Kili - degradation. Thorin - he'd never be submissive. Bard - Daddy kink. Legolas - anything that involves making you cry. Aragorn - humiliation, degradation, making you cry, etc.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Fili is a giver, and he is a natural talent; he can make you cum with ease from his mouth, and he adores to go down on you as often as he can. He loves how he has to pin your hips down so you don't get too rough when trying to fuck his mouth. Kili is a receiver, as there's nothing more that he likes than to pull out and cum all over your face; he is quite skilled at going down on you as well, though, and he'll never say no when you ask him to - he just happens to prefer receiving. Thorin is neutral; he loves to give as much as he does to receive. He's very skilled, and very talented, at giving - always grinning and humming around you when you get so weak that all you can do is buck your hips against his mouth and grunt and moan. Bard prefers to give, and he is very, very good at it, too; his speciality, and his preference, is to give you head in the morning as the first thing when you're awake. Feeling you tiredly buck your hips against his mouth and let out jagged moans of his name will always make him grin and bite his lip. Legolas likes to receive; he adores it when you've got your warm, wet mouth around his cock and the feeling of your lips around him. However, he is also quite well skilled and talented at giving, as well, and can have you panting and begging for him in seconds. Aragorn is neutral; he doesn't have a preference, but he is rather well skilled when it comes to giving, and he'll always say yes if you ask him - he's good with his hands as much as he is his mouth, though.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

Fili likes to take things a little on the slower side; he doesn't like to rush things when he's with you, and he hates the thought of being too quick to make you cum. He'll be fast and rough from time to time, but you have to ask him for it. Kili likes the rush of being hard and fast, he likes to make you gasp and grunt and groan and growl; slow and sensual is reserved for special occasions - holidays, anniversaries, birthdays. Kili likes to fuck you. Thorin can be a mix of both; sometimes, he's slow and sensual and gentle when he has you ride him on his throne and praises and encourages you. Other times, it's all about the release, and it's hard and fast and filled with animalistic growls and grunts and begs. Bard is usually slow and sensual, he likes to cherish you and to spend as much time as he can with you more often than not; but sometimes, he just wants a good, hard fuck and wants to make you cockdrunk for him. Legolas likes to take things slow, he likes to make sure that you feel everything and you're begging for him to let you cum; he also likes to tease, making sure that you're more than warmed up for him. Aragorn is a bit of a mix, and it often depends on the day, location, and his mood; usually, he likes to be quick but also sensual, whilst other times, he likes to take his time in pleasuring you as much as he can.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Fili - if you ask, he'll say yes. Otherwise, it's very rare. Kili - always down. Always. Thorin - sometimes, it's not common, though. Bard - rarely. Legolas - always down. Aragorn - occasionally.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Fili - will experiment, rarely takes risks. Kili - will experiment, always takes risks. Thorin - sometimes experiments, sometimes takes risks. Bard - not too keen on experimenting but will if you ask, rarely, very rarely takes risks. Legolas - always down to experiment, always down to take risks. Aragorn - doesn't often experiment, doesn't like to take risks.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last)

Fili - 5 or 6 rounds at most, each round lasts around 2 hours. Kili - 3 or 4 rounds at most, each lasts for an hour. Thorin - 4 rounds at most, 2 hours each. Bard - 2 rounds at most, 2 hours each. Legolas - you tap out before he does, every time. Aragorn - 2 rounds at most, about 3 hours each.

T=Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Fili doesn't own toys himself, but he did make you a set of anal beads and a metal dildo that you can use whenever he isn't around. It's probably the best thing he's ever made, as the beads are especially his pride and joy. Kili doesn't own toys himself, but if you did, he would happy to let you use them in front of him; he would love to watch you fuck yourself in the ass with a dildo, or to slip anal beads into your ass until you're thoroughly stuffed. Thorin made you a dildo made of gold and insists on you having a set of anal beads made of jewels of pure starlight; he spent days and days making it and surprised you with it on your birthday. He loves seeing you use it, especially if he walks in on you. Bard takes a hard "pass" on toys, they're really not his thing in the slightest and he doesn't really see the appeal of them, either; he doesn't mind if you have any and use them on yourself, just as long as he doesn't have to. Legolas loves toys, and has a plethora of them ready to use on you as you please; he loves to watch you squirm and beg for his cock when he's overstimulating you with one of his toys, almost as much as he loves to walk in you fucking yourself with one of them. Aragorn doesn't have any, but he would like to one day; he quite likes the thought of watching you fuck yourself with a toy whilst he sits back and watches, grinning as you overstimulate yourself and beg for him to let you cum.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Fili - very, very unfair. He'll tease you until you're panting and begging. Kili - not terribly unfair, but still likes to tease. Usually until you laugh, though. Thorin - loves to tease. He'll drive you over the edge if he can. Bard - not at all. He teases a little, but only enough to get you going. Legolas - very. He'll get you going and then drive you over the edge as much as he can. Aragorn - hardly, he prefers to be sweet to you.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

Fili - relatively loud, but tries to keep it quiet. Kili - very. He doesn't even try to be quiet. Thorin - mostly quiet. Bard - he's not loud, but he's also not quiet. Legolas - hardly, especially when he's got you laughing as he giggles. Aragorn - very quiet, very hushed.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Fili likes to spit in your ass and use that as lube; he's not sure why, but he loves it whenever you allow him to do it, and he always takes great pride in it as well. Kili likes to put hot wax on your skin to get you all riled up and going; whenever you let him do it, he'll nearly cum on the spot at the sight of the wax dripping onto your body. Thorin has a possession kink and he's really not afraid to show it and all he needs is for you to say yes. Bard loves it when he gets to have lazy days with you and spend the entire time fucking you. Legolas has gotten high with you before and had the best, funniest, giggly sex of all time. He wants to do it again. Aragorn likes to fall asleep with his cock in your ass.

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)

Fili is well endowed, both long and thick with a slight curve to the left; he's cut, and he's a grower. Kili has girth, as well as enough length to his cock, but he also has no curve, visible veins, and he's cut. A shower. Thorin has it all, seemingly. Visible veins, thick and long, a slight curve upwards, nice and cut. Bard is eight inches long, four inches in girth, a few visible veins, curves ever so slightly to the left, and is cut. Legolas is average size, with average girth and no visible veins; he curves slightly downward and is cut. Aragorn is average size but slightly above average girth, has a couple of visible veins but it's not many and you do really have to pay attention to see them. No curve, cut.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Fili's sex drive isn't terribly high, but it's not terribly low, either. He's about average. Kili is always DTF. Thorin doesn't have a really high sex drive, but it's also not really low; it's definitely on the lower end of the scale, but it's not far down. Maybe a few below average. Bard would like to think that he has a high sex drive, but he doesn't; he's on the higher end of the scale, although not hugely - definitely between high and average. Legolas has a high sex drive. He's not always DTF, but he is always happy to indulge when you ask for sex. Aragorn's sex drive is quite low, really. He's definitely way below average, at least.

Z = ZZZ (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Fili falls asleep as soon as he knows you're asleep; he won't rest until then, at all. Kili tends to stay awake long after you've dozed off; he usually spends the time just admiring you. Thorin falls asleep around the same time you do. Bard will either fall asleep straight away, or fall asleep hours after you do. There is no in between. Legolas falls asleep hours after you; he doesn't get tired easily, and he always likes to make sure you've fallen asleep before he even thinks about you. Aragorn is the same - he'll be up for hours after you've fallen asleep.

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

Lord of the Rings but I've never watched it

*slides into the post with a creepy smile* hello maggots it's me back again doing what Satan put me on this green earth to do, summarise things I have no authority to summarise.

I kind of read the Hobbit when I was like 9 or 10? And I may have seen a scene or two from the movie(s)? But that's it. So of course let's hear my hot take on the series.

The elves are hot. Like really hot. They are fucking pretty. Everyone is such a slut for them.

Now I hear some of you lil shits saying no asmi actually i'm a hobbit person no actually i prefer the dwarves and one motherfucker who says actually i'm a gollum kinnie and I'M PREEMPTING THAT BY CORRECTING POINT ONE. MOST PEOPLE ARE SUCH A SLUT FOR THE ELVES. DON'T MAKE MY POST WEIRD.

Oh yeah Gollum was a hobbit but now he's married to a ring and he calls it my precious.

I think he's also a cannibal. Not to indulge in profiling, but he looks the type.

There are like horsepeople of the apocalypse except they're just horsepeople of Smaug and they're like scary. I think their music theme/call is very cool. I do not remember.

Who is Smaug? Smaug is Bendover Cumsnatcher.

On reflection, the horsepeople might be of Sauron, not Smaug.

Who is Sauron? Idk but it's his ring and he has an eye.

Martin Freeman is the hobbit named Bilbo and he had to shave his legs for the fake legs so he has shaved legs in one Sherlock episode.

There's an old dude named Gandalf. He wears robes and says mysterious shit. He has a wand/staff and a possibly homoerotic history with the villain. He has white/grey hair and a long beard. He's the main character's mentor sometimes.

No, what do you mean R**ling's Dumblewhore is a ripoff of that? I see no similarities at all.

He's grey and then he dies and gets whitewashed by the narrative.

Frodo is played by that one actor that reminds me of Aamir Khan.

Frodo is like Freeman's nephew or something. He has a bestie named Sam. They take the ring somewhere to destroy it.

It could be Mount Doom. It could be not. It is in New Zealand. Idk.

The pretty elves live in Rivendell. I've studied to Rivendell ambience before.

The hobbits like comfort and they eat second breakfast and elevensies. I stan.

Thorin is dwarf. He's the king of something.

I had a Hobbit activity book when I was a kid. It was very cool. The riddles were fun.

Galadriel is an elf and they just made some kind of backstory series with her and ruined her character which seems on brand for modern cinema.

There's some kind of book called the Silmirallion or Similarlion or Smillylirryon IDK IT HAS A SI, L, M, A, R AND ON.

Uhhhhh that's all I've got. I am open to being educated, even though I clearly know everything about this.

[x-bluefire-heart-x]

Covered in Steam

I am back with a Thorin x female reader smut fic! I hope you guys enjoy it. This is my second Thorin fic but I think Tumblr hid my other one, so if you feel like reading an angsty but fluffy Thorin imagine head over to my master list which is tagged below.  Also feel free to check out my prompt list and feel free to request a fic!

Warnings: Sexual content,

Also any and all mistakes are mine.

Master List

Prompt List

Dance at a Feast

Even when you had been in Erebor for nearly a year you couldn’t get over how large the baths were. You had been given your own suit in the Royal Wing, a room that connected onto Thorin’s. Your Husband. It was an arranged marriage purely for the benefit of your kingdom and Erebor. Thorin already had his heirs in his nephews, so there was no need to worry about the fact that you were not a dwarf. Though some of the older dwarves had an issue with the Queen of Erebor being an outsider but the prosperity that had arrived at Erebor during its reconstruction had quietened them for the most part.

You couldn’t deny that you were hateful of the marriage at first, being forced to marry a stranger and leave your home. But after seeing Erebor and meeting Thorin and his family you slowly started to enjoy your time here and knew that you could have a life here, eventually. You hadn’t really had much interaction with Thorin outside of the formal requirements during banquets and visits from dignitaries. He had been courteous during those times and never made you feel like a nuisance but you still wished he would spend some more time with you outside the banquets. You couldn’t deny that you found the dwarf king attractive, with his commanding presence and those brilliant blue eyes, that made you feel as if you were drowning in them every time he looked at you. His very presence could some times make you weak at the knees, the way in which he commanded any room he entered affected you in a way you couldn’t explain and was not something you were expecting to happen.

You leant back against the edge of the bath lifting your leg up and watching the water run down it, the droplets creating ripples in the water. You sighed bringing your leg back into the water and leant your head back looking up to the ceiling, the light from the numerous candles reflecting back at you. You wondered if maybe you should make a move on the king. You knew that some male dwarves rather liked women who were fierce and take charge. Perhaps you could ask Thorin’s sister Dis for her advice, the two of you had gotten close. She had taken you under her wing when you arrived, helping you to navigate dwarven culture and the city itself. The two of you had truly became sisters, a thing you were grateful for as you had only had an older brother back home, with a rather large gap between your ages. He was already off with the other warriors in your father’s army, when you had been born. You would forever be grateful for Dis, and hoped that asking her for help with her brother wouldn’t make her uncomfortable.

Lost in thought as you where you hadn’t noticed when the door on the other side of the bathroom opened. The door leading to Thorin’s chambers. Thorin walked through the door only to pause upon seeing you, he hadn’t expected you to still be awake at this hour. He had been kept awake in his study dealing diplomatic issues with Balin and Ori and all he had wanted to do upon retiring was take a nice long, hot bath before sleeping. He knew he should leave or announce his presence but he found he was frozen, the firelight around you was giving you an almost golden glow and he found his breath was caught in his throat. When he had agreed upon the marriage with you, he never thought you would be anything more then maybe a friend eventually, though he hadn’t been able to give you as much attention as he had hoped. But once he met you, he found himself slowly falling for you, with your shy smile that lit up the room. You were unbelievably kind to everyone and although you were the Queen of Erebor you would offer Bombur your assistance in the kitchens before a feast and you would help Ori in the library.

Thorin’s eyes took in their fill of your nakedness, and found himself stirring. A fire building in his veins as the water lapped at your breasts, you were sitting on one of the seats along the edge of the bath, the water only just coming up to the bottom of them, your nipples hard as the air in the room chilled your heated skin from the water. He was suddenly even more sorry that he hadn’t taken more time to get to know his wife, he planned on properly courting you but didn’t know how to go about it. If you had been a dwarf, it would have been easier but had tried to find something that discussed your peoples courting customs but not even Ori and Balin were able to locate such a book.

“Your Majesty!” you voice pulled him out of his thoughts, as well as the sound of splashing water as you ducked further under the water covering yourself. Your face was red, like a ruby and Thorin found himself blushing and looking away quickly.

“My apologises, My Lady,” Thorin said. “I was unaware that you were still awake. I shall leave you to your privacy.”

“No, wait!” you stood up. This was the moment you were waiting for. You had been surprised to see Thorin but you had noticed how he was staring at you. His blue eyes almost were hungry, as they traced the parts of your body that were visible above the water. Thorin paused, half turned back towards his chambers.

“Yes?” Thorin, tried very hard to not look anywhere but your face when he turned to face you again.

“Um, join me?” you asked, trying to be brave, but your voice was soft and shy. “The bath is big enough for the both of us and we are married, I don’t see why we cannot share a bath…husband.”

“Are you sure?” Thorin asked, wanting to make sure you truly wanted this. His heart jumped at the thought of joining you. Dwarven couples often shared baths together, it was an incredibly intimate thing.

“Yes, I am very sure,” you responded. Thorin smiled, as he walked forward dropping the towel that had been wrapped around his waist.

“Well, who am I to deny my wife, my Queen,” he grinned.

You allowed your eyes to travel down, his strong chest, that was coated in dark hair, his stomach was strong and soft. Your eyes continued their path following the trail of hair that led down to his cock. It was slowly hardening, as he allowed his eyes to finally take their fill of your body. You giggled shily as Thorin stepped down into the water and made his way towards you. He stopped within arm’s length.  

“I should apologise to my Lady, we have been married for a year and I have not given you the attention you deserve,” Thorin’s grin had softened, and his blue eyes still hungry but they still held a little sorrow.

“Hmm, and I have not forced the issue my King,” you responded taking a step forward lifting your hand up lightly tracing his chest. “You are busy, your kingdom is recovering but perhaps we can start tonight.”

Thorin looked down at your touch, looking back up at you his smile turned devilish. He reached a hand out and lightly traced your cheek, down to your jaw before reaching trailing down your neck. He stepped forward bringing your bodies together. His hard cock pressing into you making you gasp at such a feeling. He hard chest pressed into your soft breasts, the sensation from his chest hair rubbing against your nipples caused your gasp to turn into a soft moan. You had touched yourself in experimentation before but had never been able to elicit such a response. He used the hold he had on the nape of your neck and pulled your head towards his as he lowered his head down to kiss you. The first touch was gentle, just a press of lips before he pulled away. Your eyes met, and you knew your eyes hard darkened as much as his. You smiled, a soft giggle leaving your lips.

“And what may I ask what is causing such a response?” Thorin asked, a joy he hadn’t felt in an age swelling up inside of him at your own happiness. It was in that moment that he decided he would do everything in his power to ensure you felt such happiness every day.

“That was my first kiss,” you breathed bringing a hand up and lightly tracing his lips and then your own.

“Your first?” Thorin asked, his hands found their place on your hips in a gently way, his thumbs rubbing against your skin. “I shall endeavour to be gentle, and ensure that your first time is one to remember. As is deserving of my Queen.”

You grinned and brought your lips to meet his again. This time it lasted for longer than just a press of lips. There was hunger in the kiss, though his lips were soft and gentle against yours, it was like he was trying to devour your very essences. Thorin’s hands stroked down your thighs, gripping as they went, they came back up and stopped at your arse, he squeezed at your ample cheeks. You moaned into the kiss as he rocked into you causing his cock to rub against you. Your hands threaded into his thick black hair, pulling at it lightly as he nipped your lips, pulling your bottom lip between his teeth before letting go. Your breath was coming out in quick succession and you noticed that his was as well, you looked down at his lips and decided they weren’t swollen enough. You lent up and tugged his bottom lip between your teeth, in a mimicry of what he had just down with you.

“Cheeky, my Queen,” Thorin groaned leaning his head down dragging his nose down your throat to where it met your shoulder. He paused there. His teeth scrapped along the joining, you moaned, your hands gripped his hair tighter and your body rocked into his. “Hm, no much to low there.”

“What is?” you asked breathlessly.

“The mark I intend to give you, I want it to be visible,” Thorin growled, his lips trailing up your throat and pausing about an inch above where it was before.

“Perfect.”

Thorin went to work on making his mark. His teeth grazed the area before latching his mouth onto it and alternating between sucking and nipping at the area. His hands continued to squeeze at your cheeks, and stroking down your thighs. He detached his mouth from your throat, happy with the results of his work.

“Happy my King?” you asked leaning back in his grip. “Will everyone who looks at it know what we have done tonight?”

“Hmm, yes, though I plan on making it even more obvious,” Thorin said, his voice gravelling and deep. “After tonight I think you’ll find you won’t be able to walk straight, my Lady.”

Thorin used the grip be had on your thighs to pick you up. You giggled and wrapped your legs around his waist, the position put your slit right over his hard cock, you rolled your hips down, grinding yourself against his cock, feeling the tip of it slip in and out. Thorin’s grip tensed at your motion, his grip hard enough to leave bruises in the morning, and the thought of that made you moan loudly. Thorin walked out of the bath and towards the open doorway to his chamber. He walked to the bed and instead of placing you on it or even throwing you onto it, he kept a hold of you and kneeled on the bed, he let go of one of your thighs and crawled towards the head of the bed before letting gently placing you on the bed.

Thorin held his body above yours, hands on either side of your head and stared at you sprawled on his bed. The image that has been plaguing his mind since the wedding. It was even better than anything his mind could conjure up. The fact that you were still wet from the bath made it even better, the light from the candles made your skin glisten. Thorin kissed the mark he had made on your throat before making his was down to the joint and further to the top of your left breast, leaving kisses in his wake. He kissed around your nipple, his hand coming up to massage and knead at your right breast. He took the hardened nipple into his mouth sucking and licking at it.

“Thorin!” you gasped, one hand grabbing and twisting the sheets in pleasure, the other hand clawed at Thorin’s shoulder your blunt nails leaving red marks.

As Thorin continued his assault on your breasts, his hips gentle rolled into yours, creating a lovely electric friction against your vagina. Your clit throbbed in pleasure as it started to swell. Thorin’s mouth left your nipple and he went to move to the next but you decided on a different direction instead. You used the grip your legs had on him and took hold of both his shoulders, using his distraction you threw your weight up and to the side rolling the two of you over. Thorin looked up at you in surprise, at the look of triumph on your face he couldn’t help but laugh.

“Well, that was unexpected my love,” Thorin chuckled. “Now that you have me what do you plan on doing?”

“Take charge,” you smirked leaning down and kissing the tip of his nose. “You had a late night, lay back and relax. Let your wife attend to you.”

“Only if I can attend to you after, for a king and a husband can not allow their other half without-” Thorin’s sentence was cut off with a deep moan as you decided to skip any teasing and took the head of his cock into your mouth. “Aule!”

You had no idea what you were doing, you listened to the noises Thorin made and repeated any motions that caused his breath to hitch, caused him to moan or groan. You focused around the head, licking and sucking making sure to pay attention to the vein on the under side of his cock. You didn’t think you could handle taking much of it into your mouth, not on your first time. You used your hands to stroke the rest of the length. Thorin’s hand gently twisted into your hair, tugging on it before massaging your head.

“I am close my love, if you don’t-” you ignored his warning sucking harder and stroking your hands faster. You tried licking the slit at the top of his dick, interested in his reaction. His thighs tensed as his hips thrusted upwards pushing his dick a little further into your mouth as his release filled it. You quickly swallowed what you could before pulling away, you felt some of his semen splash onto your face before you moved completely away. You wiped at the semen your face as it scrunched up at the feeling. Thorin was heaving as he came down from his high and saw you. His dick twitched, already feeling the stirrings again at the sight of your cheeks red and white from his semen.

“You are a sight,” Thorin breathed. “A beautiful, alluring sight. A treasure greater than any in the treasury of Erebor.”

“What do you mean?” you asked, puzzled at his reaction.

“Just that, my Queen, nothing more,” Thorin sat up, he wiped the remains of his release off your face with his fingers before wiping his hand on the bedding, he wrapped you up in his arms afterwards. He kissed you deeply, aroused even more from the taste of himself in your mouth. “Now, it is your turn to lay back and allow me to attend to you.”

Thorin’s voice was like gravel, deep within his chest. He laid you back on the bed, kissing his way down your chest and stomach, occasionally allowing his teeth to graze the skin. He paused briefly at your breasts to lap at the nipples with his tongue. You moaned and withered underneath him, your hands clutching at his back again, leaving red marks from your nails. He kissed his way down to your hip bones, biting and sucking at the skin, causing more marks to raise in his wake. He licked down the crease from your hip, down your thigh along the outside of your wet opening, before switching to the other side and licking up the crease to the hip bone and making a matching mark there.

“Thorin please!” you begged as he kissed and licked around the top of your thighs getting close to where you truly wanted him but not yet giving it attention. You felt as though your body was tingling with pleasure, as he seemed to be trying to mark your entire thighs. His hands were running up and down your sides, running under your breasts and occasionally tweaking your nipples causing a flash of pleasure to move down to the warmth growing in the pit of your stomach.

“What does my treasure desire?” Thorin asked looking up from his task. “Is it my tongue you wish for?”

“Yes!” you gasped as he blew air down onto your hot centre.

“But you have my tongue,” Thorin mused, his eyes alight with mischievous as his large hands moved to grip under your thighs holding them up and apart to allow him to settle fully in-between them. “Ah, perhaps you want my tongue elsewhere? Yes, I think that is what my lovely wife desires. My tongue inside her, and my mouth thoroughly devouring her as if you were my last meal?”

“My king, please,” you breathed. “You said you would attend to me.”

“I did, and I never go back on my word.”

You gasped loudly at the first swipe of Thorin’s tongue as he licked the full length of your slit collecting the wetness that had gathered there. He spied your swollen clit and looked up at you grinning wickedly before he lightly bit at it. You bucked in his grip at the electric jolt of pleasure that surged through you. His hands held your hips down, not allowing them even the smallest movement. He was in complete control here. Maybe after tonight, he could discuss some of his other desires and pleasures that he wished to make reality with you. Thorin took your clit into his mouth sucking gentle and bathing it with his tongue. You withered in his grip body tingling with pleasure, you could feel heat build-up behind your stomach. You had never felt anything like this. Your hands were gripping his hair tightly, pulling on it in your pleasure, you vaguely remembered something about hair being important to dwarves but in your pleasure, you could only think of more. More of him. More of his tongue, his touch. Just more.

Thorin released your clit, deciding he needed to taste more of your essence, and the only way he could do that was by going straight to the source. He moved down and licked around your opening before dipping in briefly, licking around the edge and withdrawing. He could feel your hands holding onto his hair like it was the only thing keeping you grounded. He loved the feeling of it, and in the morning, he would ask you to braid his hair. He wiggled his tongue in deeper, stroking his tongue along your walls, he could feel them twitching and tightening down around the muscle. He pulled out licking around his mouth to catch some of the essence that was in his beard.

“If I were to die tonight, I would be a very happy dwarf with this as my last meal,” Thorin grinned.

“You had better not die tonight,” you gasped. “I only just got you.”

“And you shall have me for all of eternity,” Thorin promised.

He moved back down, before he had been gentle, this time he acted as though he was a starving dwarf and he devoured you. You withered on his tongue, rolling your hips the smallest movement he allowed. He released one of your hips moving his fingers to play with your clit. Moving in a circle one way and then back the other, he flicked and stroked it. You felt the warmth in your core getting hotter and hotter. Your walls clenched more as your thighs started to tense and shake. Your breath was leaving your lungs in loud moans and gasps. With one press and flick of your clit, and strong stroke of his tongue along your walls, the dam burst and your vision went white, as your orgasm washed over you in waves. Thorin removed his mouth from your opening but continued to tease your clit through your orgasm. You arched off of the bed in your bliss. You had removed your hands from his hair and grabbed at the sheets when you felt it building stronger, you tugged at the sheets as the waves of orgasm slowed and your vision returned to you. Thorin smiled kissing your thigh and giving one last swipe of your clit before leaving it alone. He let go of your thighs, moving up the bed to hover over you again. He copied what you had done before and kissed your nose, moving to kiss both of your cheeks. You smiled up at him, still high from the pleasure he brought to you.

“My love, I wish for you to never leave my arms again,” he begged. You lazily wrapped your arms around his strong broad shoulders.

“I never will,” you smiled pushing down on his shoulders. Thorin grinned slowly lowering his body onto yours. “Now, please. Take me fully.”

[crystalbeetle888]

Voyage into the Unknown Pt.6

Master List Pt.5 - Pt.6 - Pt.7

Many more days pass, riding across fields and forest, through little valleys and rivers, up and down hills, in rain and sun. And during that time, I have only grown closer to Kili.  Not forgetting Bilbo, and Fili. Their company is the only thing keeping me sane as the older men continuously thwart any attempt of mine at helping. I feel stir-crazy as the days melt together, with nothing productive to do except talk, ride, and train at sword fight with Fili until dusk. 

The company rides up a grassy hill laying at the bottom of a tall cliff-face, large boulders scattered along the way. At the top, the ruins of an abandoned house lay. Thorin rides up to it “We’ll camp her for the night” He says, Gandalf already wandering around, inspecting the house. “Fili, Kili, look after the ponies. Make sure you stay with them” he says to his nephews. Hoping off my horse I hand Kili the reins, and take my pack down “I suppose I won't be training with your brother tonight then” I swing my now very heavy bag on my back. “Well you can always watch the ponies with us, keep us company” I look over at Thorin who seems to be arguing with Gandalf in the ruined house “I’m not sure that he’s in the mood for suggestions right now, plus I think he’d say I’m ‘too distracting’” I mock Thorins’ deeper voice. Kili chuckles “You’re probably right”. “I’m definitely right,” I nod, pursing my lips. “And how do you know that?” he asks, “Because I’m a woman, and I know everything” we laugh together, Kili nodding along until a loud outraged voice interrupts us “Myself, Mr.Baggins!” Gandalf storms past us “I’ve had enough of dwarves for one day” I hear him mutter to himself as he wanders off into the wild. “Come on, Bomber, we’re hungry” Thorin calls over. The company whispers to one another “Where do you think he’s going?” I turn to Kili in concern, “Probably just off for a smoke, maybe a bath” He shrugs, not caring that the powerful being has essentially left us until further notice. Anxiety begins to creep into my mind, making me feel restless. Kili wanders off with his brother taking the ponies with him. 

Settling in for the night, Bofur fills up peoples’ bowls with the thick stew. I get up and hop in line for seconds, behind Bomber, who patiently waits for his turn. Bilbo fidgets, walking back and forth “He’s been a long time” He stomps over, “Who?” Bofur asks, “Gandalf” Bilbo stresses, Bofur scoffs “He’s a Wizard. He does as he chooses. Here, do us a favour. Take these to the lads” He hands over two bowls to Bilbo who didn’t really want to help out. Bomber sneaking the ladle for his fourth serving, tries to sip straight out the spoon “Stop it. You’ve had plenty” Bofur chides him, wrestling the ladle from him. “Let him eat if he’s hungry” I say, frowning at Bofur. The two turn to look at me, Bomber smiling under his thick braided beard, and Bofur shaking his head “Don’t start down that road lass, he’ll eat you out of house and home” He wags his finger. I roll my eyes at his antics “He’s not a bottomless pit”. Bofur laughs and whacks Bombers fat belly “He’ll eat a whole cheese wheel and then some lass” the two dwarves laugh, Bomber looking quite proud of himself. “Bullshit” I say, causing the two to chortle louder “Language lass! Bombers appetite is something to behold” he exclaims. I uh huh them, taking the ladle and pouring a scoop into my bowl “I’ll believe it when I see it mate” “Well, maybe one day you’ll have to experience a true dwarvish feast, that’s where the real action happens” He winks and I laugh “I suppose I’ll have to then aye” He nods with a chuckle as I turn away, and walk around the socialising men to find a quiet spot to sit and enjoy my meal. 

The wind is nice and cool after a long hot day of horse riding, my legs ache deeply, my heart aching also. Homesickness isn’t something I thought I would be feeling. But here I am, sadly sipping my stew, longing for my daily, or even weekly routine. Opening up the studio in the early morning, working away at my latest collection of paintings until noon, where I would then go and help teach at the local dojo to the juniors class. Some may think my schedule was repetitive or boring, but I really enjoyed the normality and structure. Always buying a vanilla iced chai from the bakery next door, possibly a mini pizza or pasty. Always passing by the same calico street cat, sitting on the town statue down the front most street, waiting for pets or food offerings. I had always thought her name was Fatty or Big Bess, Bessie for short. But I’ve heard other suggestions like Spot or Tiger, or more suitable ones for her weight like Jabba or Big girl.

I sniffle, face heating up at the thought of home. Taking a deep breath to settle my heart, I barely notice Balin walking over “You alright lass?” I jump, his voice surprising me, “Yeah just missing home, you know” I continue to sip on my now cold soup. “Aye I know that feeling well” He sits down on a rock beside me “Sometimes it helps to talk of it” He smiles warmly at me “Tell me about it hay?”. I sigh “I was actually thinking of a fat street cat” I laugh sadly and he chuckles “Not thinking of family?” He jokes. I smile strained at him “No, I don’t have any family left” stir my soup aimlessly. “I’m sorry lass, I didn’t mean anything by it” He apologises quickly “Nah it’s all good mate, they died a long time ago” I stare out over the dark valley, clouds rolling over the hills. “How’d they pass?” He asks quietly, “My mother died of- uh a brain illness, and my father died from- overindulgence in substance” I say before sculling the last of cold stew in one gulp. “I’m sorry lass, sometimes terrible things occur and all we can do is hold out, in hope of a better day” He leans over and pats my shoulder in a very fatherly way, causing my eyes to water “Thank you” I whisper. 

The moment of solemn silence between us is broken by two princes rushing through the brush shouting “Thorin! Mountain trolls have snatched the ponies!” they shout alerting the company “Bilbo went ahead to try and release them, we don’t know how long he’ll last” Fear strikes my body ‘Shits’ just gotten real’ I think scared as the men grab their weapons, preparing for a fight ‘What the fuck is a mountain troll?’ I place my hand on my sheathed sword. I've never had to use this in an actual fight before, let alone aim to kill someone. Balin places his hand on mine “Stay here lass, if we don’t return, run like the wind and find Gandalf”. I nod shamefully, knowing I won’t be of much use. As the men march off to battle, the princes leading the way, a deafening silence washes over the camp. My anxiety spiking through the roof, ‘When am I supposed to run?’ ‘Where am I supposed to go’ and most nerve-wracking ‘What if they need help?’ I jitter and buzz with adrenaline, pacing around the camp. “How about I just go and check it out? Yeah, then if they need help I’ll- do- something” I hype myself up. Pulling out my machete from my pack, I jog into the woods, making sure to keep low. A bright glow lights up the forest ‘How did we not notice them?’. I creep up to the light and hide in a bush at the top of the mound, overlooking their camp. In the centre of the clearing a large bonfire is lit, with some of the dwarves spit-roasting over it. Three giant, ugly, ‘mountain trolls’ stand around arguing with Bilbo about how they're going to cook the company, before one of them picks up Bomber and dangles him over his mouth. Sliding on my belly, down the mound and through the brush, I sneak up behind Thorin who lays closest, and grab the rope tying his sack closed. Thorin jumps at the touch before I shush him, working on cutting him free.

“Oh, not that one. He’s infected.” The troll turns to look at him “Huh?” “You what?” they ask outraged. “Yeah, he’s got worms in his- tubes” Bilbo makes something up quickly, and to my surprise the troll toss Bomber back on the pile with a loud “Eww!”. “In fact, they all have. They're infested with parasites. It’s a terrible business and I wouldn't risk it. I really wouldn’t” He tries to convince them. 

Their conversation about parasites drift into the background as I focus on cutting though this stupidly thick rope, with my stupidly small pocket knife. Finally cutting it, I pull the cord loose from around Thorin's neck, and attempt to grasp the back of Thorin's shirt and pull him up. However he’s much heavier than I expected, and I struggle to pull him even an inch up into the scrub. “Come here you!” one of the trolls exclaims before I am suddenly lifted up by my leg. “Oi look Tom, look what I've got” He proudly waves me in the air, ragdolling me, to the other trolls. “Put her down!” “Leave the lass alone!” the company shouts angrily. The troll brings me to his face and gives me a long sniff. “Mmmh man-flesh” he says, rancid breath wafting over my face causing me to dry-heave upside-down “And it’s a female” he says excitedly. “Taste better than the males” He raises me high above his face causing me to shout out in fear and wriggle furiously in his grip, kicking and punching his hand “Put me down you fat ugly cunt!” I scream at him causing him to crack up laughing. “Do you ‘ear that Will? This ones’ got fight in it” He shakes me around violently, ceasing my wriggling. 

“The dawn will take you all!” Gandalf’s voice bellows over the commotion. “Who’s that?” “No idea.” “Can we eat him too?” the trolls ask before Gandalf strikes the stone he stands on, breaking it in half and allowing the morning light to cascade over the trolls. They retract, groaning in pain as they quickly turn to stone. The company cheers joyfully “Oh, get your foot out of my back” Dwalin complains from the spit-roast. Still hanging upside-down in the dead troll's grip, the blood really begins to rush to my head. “A little help anyone” I mutter weakly as my vision begins to spot. “Just hold on lass we’ll get you down” someone yells.

Eventually, after they had saved themselves, the dwarves managed to get me on the ground again. “You could’ve sustained serious injury, have you no care for yourself?” Thorin hisses as he marches over. Tired and nauseous, I lay flat on the dewy grass, without saying a word in response. I groan in discomfort, being shook around like that has really pulled everything out of place. “Do you have nothing to say for yourself?” He scoffs. “Yeah, I do have something to say actually. Sod off!” I bark back at him before covering my eyes with my arm, a headache slowly creeps up my neck. Balin interrupts Thorin by saying something in Khazdul, causing him to back off in a huff. Thorin then goes to harass Gandalf leaving Balin to tend to my wounds.

Master List Pt.5 - Pt.6 - Pt.7

[inkwolvesandcoffee]

GRAND! NOW I CAN’T STOP THINKING ABOUT WEREWOLF!THORIN😤

RA Masterlist

Thorin is moody and bad-tempered, which doesn’t make him particularly popular with the villagers. Hence is why he’s the outsider.

Not that he minds. He keeps himself occupied with woodworking and carpeting, perfectly content to be left alone and only conduct business when necessary.

Tends to wear his hair in a messy though charming man bun.

Also, lots of flannel shirts.

You two get off on the wrong foot, meeting a few days after your arrival in the village.

''So, this is the city dweller.” Arms crossed, he appeared at your side when you went to check out the venue for your business. “Tell me, miss, what's a woman like you doing in Scotland?''

“I could ask the same of you,” you said, triggered by the condescending tone in his voice. “What’s a Mid-lander doing up north?”

“Answer the question.”

''I'm here to fix up this building.''

''Why?''

''My grandmother left it to me.''

''Doesn't mean you have to do anything with it. Might as well demolish it or sell it. Look at the place. It's in shambles.''

''But it's what my Nan left me.''

''Wow, what an inheritance.''

''Well, if you must know, I have some people willing to help fix this place. All of who told me they'd appreciate a bakery in town.''

''Any experience running a business?''

''N- No...'' you admitted, avoiding his icy blue eyes.

''Thought as much. You look more like an office worker than a baker.'' He snorted. ''Good luck. It's as dilapidated as the castle ruins.''

Nevertheless, he ended up helping with the renovation after seeing you struggle carrying furniture assembly kits, covered in paint.

Thorin didn’t know how to respond when you told him to take a break and have a cup of coffee.

Neither did he know why he followed your movements and felt awkward when your eyes met for a second. Feigning nonchalance, he averted his gaze to something in the distance, feeling rather hot under the collar.

He’s more wolf than man, so he’s not one for conversation and can be rather rough around the edges.

But he also leaves you flowers or berries he finds in the woods when he makes his usual rounds around his territory.

At first they showed up on your doorstep in a rattan basket without a trace of who sent them. However, when he walked by and saw the happiness on your face when you put the flowers in a vase, he added a note.

His handwriting isn’t the best, but that didn’t matter.

What did is that you finally knew his name.

Yes, only then did you learn it because he didn’t introduce himself while helping you set up the bakery and the villagers only refer to him as “sassenach” or worse.

Lycanthropy has already fully erased the memory of his cousins, who live nearby and keep an eye on him.

Appreciates how you make him breakfast ever since he first showed up on your doorstep after the full moon.

And how could you have turned him away when he's naked, panting, and looking awfully pale?

Thinks it’s adorable how you’re so concerned for him.

But you are because you believe he isn’t the monster the others make him out to be. Deep down, he’s a good man.

It takes some bloody work to help clear his atrocious reputation, though.

Let me clarify what makes it incredibly hard:

He frequently hunts in wolf form and returns all bloody dragging a carcass.

Fights tend to break out in the pub whenever he goes there for a bevvy.

He growls and snarls.

People have seen him skulking around the castle ruins naked early in the morning, sometimes covered in blood and grime.

Thorin gives you apologetic puppy eyes whenever you tell him to be a little nicer.

Recently, he went through a drastic change. It left you gobsmacked to the point you had to consciously make an effort to put down the hot tray with freshly baked bread and properly inspect the man standing at the counter.

“Who are you and what have you done to Thorin?”

“Very funny,” he grumbled, self-consciously rubbing the back of his neck.

“Seriously, though. What’s the reason for this?”

“You told me to be a little more human, so I cut my hair.”

“I meant in demeanour, not appearance! Also, why listen to what I say? I thought you were too bloody stubborn for that.”

“Be a bit clearer next time. Just because I don’t respond doesn’t mean I’m not listening.” He averted his gaze to the ground. “All that effort for nothing.”

“You look good, though.”

“I do?”

“Yeah.” You crossed your arms and smiled at him to ease his discomfort. “It’s weird to see you with short hair, but I’m sure we’ll both get used to it. Anyway, what do you want for breakfast?”

“The usual.”

“The rough night one?”

“Mhm.”

“Got it. By the way, thank you for the flowers.” You turned back to him for a moment and bounced on your heels. “I really like them.”

“My pleasure.”

He briefly watched you set off to make your famous deluxe breakfast club sandwich as he sat down on one of the stools and leaned on the counter.

There’s a lot he still doesn’t understand when it comes to you.

However, what he knows for sure is that he doesn’t want to forget you. Moreover, the Wolf and him both are strangely fond of you.

And you’re prettier than any flower in the world.

[hms-tardimpala]

Goldsickness collection: the recs!

Dragonsickness is a theme I love, it resonates with me with very much, and I had a great time reading fics to make this collection. Here are the eight I love the most and that make up this 376-pages-book.

As Befits a King by Ladysisyphus (explicit, 4,7k)

It was all too much to think about, so he thought about Thorin's hands.

This fic strikes a good balance between angst, hope and hot possessive sex. Thorin is teetering on the edge of madness here, despite Bilbo's best efforts.

Chains of Gold by Plooby (explicit, 4k)

He had not been in the king's chambers since their arrival, not since his youth, and the massive gilt doors opened only with groaning reluctance under his hands.

This is actually a sequel to the fic above, the authors worked on a series together. It's just as brilliant, hot and well-written. You can see the old Thorin under the madness.

What was promised by Paranoid_fridge (unrated, 6,9k)

Perhaps Bilbo is being selfish. But even though he knows that Thorin's mind has grown clouded from cursed gold, he is unwilling to give up on the intimacy they share. And when Thorin - with his mind still bespelled - asks for his hand, Bilbo does not decline either. With armies before the gate and a battle to come, things must come to a head.

Interesting concept: Thorin and Bilbo get married while Thorin is dragonsick. It raises the question of consent. The battles scenes are great and Bilbo is a badass.

Lay your troubles down by Avelera (explicit, 24k)

An extended version of "the acorn scene." Bilbo sees his chance to snap Thorin out of his madness, and takes it.

This fic is a great, slow deconstruction of Thorin's illness by Bilbo. The author goes all the way to the bedrock of the character to start healing him, and there are setbacks and false starts (which is what I prefer in fics where Thorin heals).

Covet by Pomgore (explicit, 33,3k)

"How is he?” Bilbo asked softly, trying to keep the worry from his voice. Balin’s face went dark, and he sipped thoughtfully on his tea. “... It’s slow, but his fever has begun to break,” he said. “Still, it’s the worst I’ve seen him. I think it’s the worst he’s ever had.” ~~~ Thorin recovers from both physical and mental afflictions. As with all recovery, the path of healing is non-linear and agonizingly difficult.

This is also a fantastic healing fic (this one post-canon) that treats dragonsickness as a mental illness, with relapses in the recovery. I loved that portrayal, I recognized myself in it. And the fic scratches some specific itches of mine.

Red Lines in Dark Stone by Elenothar (mature, 4,3k)

After BOFA Thorin is wrecked by guilt, convinced that most of the bloodshed is his fault (see: the arkenstone debacle). As king and responsible for Erebor, he decides that he will do anything to stop himself from succumbing to the gold sickness again, even if it means hurting himself. When his family and friends find out, they don't react as he'd expected them to.

Self-harm is another theme that's dear to me. This is an excellent portrayal of self-harm, the author got it perfectly right. It's good to read a post-canon fic where, even when he's past the goldsickness, Thorin still suffers its consequences.

Of Monsters and Men by MsThunderFrost (mature, 1,3k)

Thorin will protect Bilbo from everything. Even if that includes himself.

Look, I love dark and twisted stuff, so this fic was an absolute bitter candy for me, I dig it. Heed the warnings!

Burning with a magnificent madness by EmilianaDarling (mature, 7,3k)

Thorin’s madness had been like a dam bursting; fast and brutal and incomprehensible, like water rushing out and devastating everything in its path. For Bilbo, it’s more like a slow trickle over the course of a lifetime. Out of sight and out of mind - and almost imperceptible until he’s already drowning.

This is an incredibly moving study of madness in Thorin's and Bilbo's lives, caused by the gold and the One ring. Bilbo's life is really tragic and it's heartbreaking to see him sink into addiction to the ring. Prepare tissues.

[cactusspatz]

February recs

Trying something new this month! I've got five top recs below (most of which are quite long, sorry not sorry), but in an attempt to keep my Pinboard more contemporary I've put all of my January bookmarks up at this tag if you're looking for more to read.

Below are recs for: 9-1-1, The Untamed, Game of Thrones, and The Hobbit. And at Pinboard are more recs for 9-1-1, The Untamed, & The Hobbit, plus Batman, Goblin Emperor, KJ Charles, and Star Wars!

Hot Ghost Problems by ebjameston (9-1-1, Buck/Eddie)

The ghost would prefer to go by Buck, if Eddie wouldn’t mind. Eddie is the newest firefighter at the 118. Buck is the ghost haunting the 118. Unfortunately for both of them, Eddie's also a witch and needs to put Buck's spirit to rest, because that's what witches do. Turns out, Buck's spirit? Super not interested in being put to rest. Very interested, however, in flirting with Firefighter Diaz, who is just trying to survive his candidate year. (Also turns out, Buck? Super not dead.)

I adore this trope, but this one's got great worldbuilding around the magic, and the author is skilled at combining drama and humor. So you've got the emotions and pining but also Eddie's sisters roasting him via group chat, and so on.

Batting a Buck & Change by Daisies_and_Briars (9-1-1, Buck/Eddie)

“Do you remember that shift where Buck was off and Hen was on mandatory relaxation, and they both got drunk in Hen’s kitchen in the middle of the afternoon while we had to resuscitate a canine?” Eddie nods vigorously. “Oh, Hoover. I remember Hoover.” “Why have we never been drunk during a dog resuscitation, Eddie? Have you thought about that?” “Well now I am.” “We should call them and let them know that we can have fun on Dads’ Night Out.” Nothing could go wrong. OR: Eddie and Chim embark on a “Dad’s night out” to watch baseball at a sports bar, and after a few too many, Eddie accidentally lets his feelings for Buck slip.

I am weak for shenanigans and Chimney's keeping-secrets fail - one of his panicked attempts to escape a conversation in this is HYSTERICAL, you'll know the one - and this fic has a top-tier assortment of both, plus a lovely Eddie-Chim friendship/baseball buddies/mutual dad admiration society.

The Pack Survives by astolat (GoT, Robb/everybody)

There is a land of the living and a land of the dead and the bridge is love, the only survival. —Thornton Wilder

Sprawling AU where the South makes peace and Robb lives - but ends up having to deal with internal rebellion, polyamory negotiation, dragons, and of course, a terrifying army of the dead. Features Robb growing up and making fewer and better mistakes in addition to his usual tactical genius, plus a fantastically sharp Sansa.

Thicker Than Water by athena_crikey (The Untamed, Wangxian)

The Lans were one of the founding families of the Vancouver Guild; part of their legacy is to maintain their place in it for the benefit of all. Cultivation is important, essential, serious. In the distance, something squeaks. A disaster, is Lan Zhan’s first impression as the bike squeals to a halt on the far side of Song Lan’s car. The man riding it – and he’s tall, and lanky, and sure-footed – hops off and locks it to the car’s back door. The back door of a police vehicle. He pulls his helmet off to reveal long, sweat-soaked hair with a shaggy undercut, bright grey eyes, and a smile that launches like an arrow straight through Lan Zhan’s chest. No, he thinks, watching this trainwreck of a man shimmy between the narrow space dividing Song Lan’s back bumper and the next car’s hood like he’s doing some kind of dance step. Absolutely not.

Excellent modern-with-cultivation AU with a gorgeously written Lan Zhan POV - both in terms of the prose and his deep-seated trauma that bubbles up along the way.

A Passion For Mushrooms by Chrononautical (The Hobbit, Bilbo/Thorin)

There are many trials for a hobbit attempting to make a life among dwarves. A hobbit wants a garden. A hobbit wants to eat regular meals. A hobbit wants friends, good books, and comfortable chairs. Bilbo does his best to carve out a little hobbit life for himself in the mountain. If only there were not one final obstacle. For a hobbit heart wants love, and among dwarves that is a sticky subject.

AKA the one with the mushroom mine, more feelings about guilds than I ever imagined having, and some epic cultural misunderstandings (both romantic and otherwise). I'm very much showing up to this widely recced story 6 years late with Starbucks, but it's got fantastic worldbuilding, humor, and romance.

Enjoy the reads! I always like it when people tell me which ones they liked so feel free 😘

[theerrorofmylife]

Witch Queen Ch. 4

Thorin x Witch!Reader

It took me hours to find the sword types for this stupid chapter, and even longer when I spent a literal week reading about Ecthelion and the fall of Gondolin when I didn’t even need or use any of the information.

I GOT A DOG!! That’s kinda why I haven’t been as active, training and caring for her takes a lot of time, especially when she’s so young. I’ve also been sick for the past several weeks. I’m sick with the flu one week then I catch a shitty chest cold the next, it’s hellish.

I drank a ghost energy drink so I could stay awake and focus at work. Instead, I made this 2-3,000 words LONGER THAN WHEN I STARTED. Hehe whoops, I cut it off so that it wasn't longer than 5,000.... it would have been like... 7,000 if I hadn't.

Warnings: General LOTR/Hobbit danger, chase scene, non-important character death, reader can't run (just like me), Thorin and reader are so soft and in love its disgusting, kissing, smooches, these two get just a tad handsy, cursing, Thorin being rude to Elrond because he can be, elvish translated in italics directly after its said (unless translated by character). If there's any I missed, let me know.

“For you.” Turning to my right, I saw Thorin holding a sword out to me, the hilt glittering silver in the firelight of the ark troll cave. I recognized the thin scrolling designs and the soft, thin wrap of leather around the handle. It was of Elvish make, forged before my time, during the first age. I noticed another, very similar to it, in his other hand.

“It is beautiful, seronil, thank you.” I carefully took the blade from him, examining the sharp edge for nicks as he bound his own to his belt. Along the fine edge were several small places that looked worn, put to good use in battle I’d hope. It was not mine to examine for long before it was taken out of my hands. Looking up, Thorin had taken it and began strapping it to my side. My ears went hot as his hands ghosted my sides and my eyes scattered across the cave, only to find that the others had all left, most likely for shovels to make that ‘long-term deposit’.

“Âzyungâl,” He tightened the belt around my hips, and I lifted my face. I hadn’t even realized I was looking anywhere else besides him.

“These were forged in Gondolin… by the High Elves, of the First Age,” Gandalf spoke up from behind us, and Thorin’s face dropped into a scowl. Something about Thorin wishing we would have just a few minutes more to ourselves only to have Gandalf of all people interrupt him made me laugh silently. “You could not wish for a finer blade.” He was holding his own broad sword, straight and narrow opposed to our matching curved single edge falcatas. Leaning forwards, I pressed my lips to his cheek quickly before brushing past him and making my way out of the cave, paying extra attention to the ground as the reality of what I had done sets in. I hadn’t done that yet… neither had he, not really, I didn’t think kissing my hands counted quite the same.

 I snapped out of my thoughts as I nearly tripped, stopped short and looked up to take account of the others. They were scattered here and there, some talking about the gold in the troll cave, others talking about the journey ahead. It seemed like the calm after the storm had settled around us, as if we were finally going to get back to the monotonous journey once again. I could never be so lucky.

“Something’s coming!” Ori ran down from the rock top he was looking over. My hand reached over to pull my sword from my side as Thorin ran over and placed himself in front of me, his own sword already raised. A tethered pack of rabbits raced over the hill, pulling a sleigh behind it.

“Thieves! Fire! Murder!” A mad man raved as he came to a screeching halt in front of us. He was of man, not as tall as Gandalf, but younger, with a large nose and lichen growing down the side of his face, as if he were part tree. His hat had strange flaps at the sides, and his brown-greying hair and beard was matted and wild. A crazed look sat in his wide eyes, and he was rumbling nonsense. Gandalf was the first to move, placing his sword back at his side with a sigh of relief.

“Radagast! Radagast the Brown!” Radagast? He was one of the other Wizards Gandalf mentioned weeks ago. Relief quickly shifted to suspicion as Gandalf approached this new stranger, “What on earth are you doing here?”

“I was looking for you, Gandalf. Something’s wrong. Something’s terribly wrong.” Radagast was out of breath, whispering bad omens and glancing about like he was scared of being watched.

“Yes?”

“Just give me a minute. Um…Oh! I had a thought and now I’ve lost it. It was…it was- was right there, on the tip of my tongue! Oh! It’s not a thought at all! It’s a silly old… stick insect.” A long green bug crawls out of his open mouth and I have to look away not to be sick at the thought. The two walk off, Gandalf separating Radagast from the prying eyes of the company. An unease settled over us as we lowered our weapons but not our guard. The two talked for some time, and some of the company had sat down, others conversing in small groups, while sat with Bilbo, talking about home.

He missed his home so much and he spoke of it so fondly of his house and his books and his peaceful days. He had many neighbors whose company he enjoyed, family who he dedicated his time to, and even the luxury of six meals a day. I’d like to think that, over the course of these past several weeks, I had found a friend in Bilbo. Much like a confidant, he seemed to be one of the few I could openly talk to about things without the topic of Thorin always coming up. For 13 dwarves who spent much of their lives with him, they sure do ask me about him a lot.

Howling in the distance set the party on edge. No one moved, some didn’t even breathe, all hoping the howling would pass.

“Was that a wolf?” Bilbo asked quietly beside me. I shook my head, knowing wolves would be better than what it actually probably was.

“Wolves? No… that was no wolf.” I whispered. Thorin came running down from the cliff’s edge, rocks sliding as he made a fast descend to the rest of the group.

“Warg Scouts! Which means an orc pack is not far behind.” Everyone began moving so fast, packing things and readying themselves. I stuffed my things into my pack, my mother’s book getting shoved in carelessly. Gandalf was yelling, something about telling someone something, I wasn’t really listening. I was brought out of my frenzied rush by Dwalin brushing past me.

“We have to get out of here.”

“We can’t! We have no ponies. They bolted.” Panic was setting in. In the near distance, the howling and barking got louder. Glancing around the group, I met Thorin’s eyes. He met mine as he looked around the group. He didn’t know what to do, how could he, this was the first time any of us heard about Wargs and Orcs being on our tail.

“I’ll draw them off.” Radagast spoke up, and Gandalf quickly tried to shut him down.

“These are Gundabad Wargs. They will outrun you!”

“These are Rhosgobel rabbits. I’d like to see them try.” I didn’t know what Rhosgobel rabbits were, but if it gave us a chance then I’ll take it.

As soon as Radagast’s sleigh cleared the tree line we made a run for it. All of us running low to the ground I don’t remember the last time I ran like this. My chest burned, the air cold on my throat, cheeks flushing. We moved from rock cluster to bolder, dodging the Wargs’ line of sight and praying the Radagast kept them busy enough for us to make it to the next rock cluster. Running up and down hill was killing me. My mind raced with unhelpful thoughts; ‘what if we didn’t all make it?’ ‘What if I didn’t make it?’ ‘Can Wargs be quiet enough to surprise us and kill us off one by one?’ Like I said, very unhelpful. Gandalf was leading us northeast, and something about it seemed familiar. I didn’t have time to ponder it though, because the farther we got from our starting point, the closer Radagast and the Warg pack got.

We were all waiting behind a single large rock cluster when claws scraping against stone and hungry growling slowly crept over the hill to our backs. We pressed ourselves to the stone, clinging to the hope that maybe the Warg and its rider would not see us. Little chips of stone fell on my shoulders as loud snorts made the little hairs on the back of my neck stand on point. I think I was shaking, just a little, and my eyes focused on the expanse of yellowing grass, staggered pines, and tall, sharp stones. A hand unfocused my eyes as it came to hover above my collar bone. I followed the wrist, then the forearm, then the bicep, then the strong jawline, to the grey-blue eyes more focused on telling Kili to shoot the damn thing. The second his arrow flew we were made. He didn’t kill the scout, instead it took a second arrow to trip the Warg, and it tumbled off the hill in front of us. The scout got to its feet and ran at us, but Dwalin drove his axe into its side while Nori stabbed it repeatedly. It made so much noise, the sounds of the chase beyond had gone quiet. I shouldered Thorin out from in front of me, stretching my arm out to see the Warg hound clearly as I imagined holding the Warg’s skull in my hand, just above its spine. I pulled at the imaginary feeling until I just nearly felt it tangible and twisted my wrist harshly. The Warg’s neck snapped abruptly, and we all froze as the hills around us fell deathly silent. A horn, yelling in Orcish, and the howling started again, coming for us.

It wasn’t long before we were cornered, surrounded. We were all separated, in little groups of two or three, staggering and breathless. Looking over Nori’s shoulder, I caught sight of the boys and Thorin, a ways out to our left. Kili was shooting them one by one, but it did little to damage them. If he happened to land a successful shot, another Warg replaced it fast. My vision was blurring as I tried to keep track of everything. I couldn’t tell whether we were missing someone or if that was just the dizzying turn of my eyes.

“Where’s Gandalf?” Wait, what, where was Gandalf? He’s taller than everyone, he shouldn’t be hard to miss, so where-

“This way, you fools!” He appeared from behind a rock and the confusion mixed with the fear and the relief and made me sick. All this running was making me dizzy. I wasn’t built for running, I’m 5” with the physique of a relaxed walker… not a runner. One by one dwarves fell into the hidden tunnel, falling on top of one another, elbows, knees, and backpacks clashing down the steep fall. I pulled my arms up to shield my head as I rolled down the slope. My back hit the sharp ground, then my arms, then my back again.

Standing from the gravel littered ground, I began brushing myself off while narrowly avoiding elbows as the Dwarves did the same in the close proximity of the tunnel entrance.

“Kili! Run!” Thorin’s voice echoed down into the cave. The boys, Fili and Kili, were still out there. Fili came sliding first, and I grabbed his arms, pulling him out of the way as Kili followed shortly after. Watching the cave entrance, the longer it took for Thorin to join us, the longer panic took me over. Rocks and pebbles rained down on us as he came skidding to a halt. I breathed, filling my lungs fully for the first time since meeting Radagast. A horn sounded from somewhere nearby, and large hands pushed me back behind the party as a body fell after Thorin. An orc, unmoving, with an arrow sticking out of its back. Thorin pulled the arrow, examining it before throwing it in disgust. “Elves.”

The fear and sudden relief mixing in my chest were starting to make me sick. Looking over, I saw Thorin already looking at me, head tilted slightly as if to ask a question. I smiled and let my chest sink into a sigh as I nodded. I was ok. We were all ok.

“I cannot see where the pathway leads. Do we follow it or not?” Dwalin interrupted our silent conversation.

“We follow it, of course!” There was shoving, and the party was slowly forming a line to walk down the path.

“I think that would be wise.” I heard Gandalf mutter and realized that this was part of his plan. He led us here, knowing we would find this place, and he knows where it leads. Thorin realized the same thing.

“Where are you leading us...?” He didn’t get a response, only a strange look before Gandalf walked off to keep the others on track. The others passed me, each nodding towards me, like a gesture of acknowledgement or respect. It was weird but I moved past it. I went to follow, but a hand pressed against my back and on instinct I relaxed back into the warmth. Thorin wrapped his hand from my back around to my side and pulled my back against his chest, pressing a chaste kiss to my left shoulder. “Are you alright, My Lady?”

I smiled again, turning to meet his eyes. “Yes, My King, simply not built for running like that.” He chuckled low nodding.

“You and me both.” He kissed my shoulder again, slowly this time, moving from my shoulder up my neck until he was pressing slow kisses on my pulse point, under my jaw. We really should catch up with the others. His hands held me tighter, holding me fast against his chest. No matter how warm he was against me, he gave me chill bumps along my arms and down my back, my neck slowly leaning to the side as if to open up for him. He littered my neck with his kiss as his hand slowly lowered from my side to my hip bone, grabbing, as if desperate to go lower.

“Thorin?” Dwalin calls from far along the pathway. My whole-body tenses and Thorin lets out a silent laugh. I’m glad he finds getting caught so amusing.

“I’m following, Dwalin. Let me go at my own pace.” His hands moved to my waist to rub circles into my back with his thumbs.

“Aye. And is the Witch moving at your pace as well?” My face flushed red and Thorin kept laughing. This bastard-

“She is.” He called after Dwalin and sighed into my shoulder. “Let’s go, My Lady. I fear I’ve kept you for too long.” We walked along the stone pathway, the rocks towering above us to create a ravine that let the sunlight dance down on top of us. I walked behind Thorin, fingers locked with his, and we trailed behind the others at a distance so that we could talk.

“What are we going to when we get to the end of this? Gandalf knows where we’re going, and I feel like I do to- I just can’t place it.” Thorin nodded.

“Wherever we end up, we stay close together, and we do not let our guard down. I don’t care if it’s a friendly place we’re headed to. If anyone catches wind of our true intentions, to enter the mountain and reclaim it, they will try to stop us.” I hummed in agreement. Since leaving Bag End, I had found it hard to disagree with his rough, secretive outlook on this quest. Clearly things were not as they seemed when it came to the mountain.

“What if it’s the elves? Gandalf had been asking about seeing them before the trolls, is it unreasonable to think he would lure us to them?” Thorin visibly sulked at the thought but shook his head.

“No, that’s most likely exactly what he’s doing. Whatever they want, they will not have.”

“And if they want to help us?” He shook his head again.

“They won’t, and you know it. We must be careful Amrâlimê.” I nodded but suddenly had a thought that had never occurred to me before.

“What does that mean?” He stopped, turning confused.

“What does what mean?”

“Amrâlimê. What is that word? You’ve said other singular words like it too, but I don’t recognize them. And the other A- one and the I- one! I do not know these and yet-”

“What are you talking about?!” He interrupted me and my eyes widened in annoyance. He wasn’t answering me, and I felt like he was doing that on purpose.

"There was one that Kili called me, Irak-something! Thorin, please!” He smiled and shook his head, that rare smile like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“Irak’Amad, My Lady, is Aunt.” It took me a second to process but when I realized I smiled so wide my eyes crinkled. Fili and Kili have been calling me Aunt and I didn’t even know.

“And the others?” He looked down at my lips before meeting my eyes, his hands coming to sit on my hips again.

“Sanâzyung means perfect love,” he leaned in, pulling my chest against his. The way he spoke his native tongue, deep and rumbling in his chest, it made my head hazy. “and Âzyungâl means lover,” His head tilted down, lips a breath away from mine, so close I could feel him speaking against mine. “and Amrâlimê… means my love.” He gently pressed his lips to mine and suddenly the very thought of not kissing Thorin felt detrimental to my health. We had never kissed like this before; it had always been on the hands or shoulders. We were always with people, or in danger, never alone with no one to interrupt. It was slow, and I gently wrapped my hands around the back of his neck, threading my fingers through the hair at the base of his neck. He sighed through his nose, and we would have stayed there like that for hours had we not heard the others. Gasps of surprise and Dwalin calling Thorin’s name, sounding mildly panicked, broke us apart once again and this time it was I who sighed in agitation.

“We will never be alone, will we.” He gave a wry smile, pressing his lips to mine again, quickly this time. I didn’t want this to end, who knows when we’d get another chance to be so close. But the mission pressed on, and the road was long before the end of our journey.

 We caught up with the others and I was stunned at what I saw. Tall, spiraling, elegant towers, graceful waterfalls under delicate bridges stretching across the great expanse of the mountain’s edge. Great halls with high arches and curving stone glittered in the afternoon light. The great Elven estate was built in the mouth of the valley, looking out over the river as it extends east.

“The Valley of Imladris. In the common tongue, it’s known by another name.” Gandalf spoke over our awe, rounding the ledge as we all looked on.

“Rivendell.” A whisper came from my left and I looked over to see Bilbo, eyes wide.

“Here lies the last homely house, east of the sea.” I remember coming here, once, a long time ago with Thranduil. I was incredibly young, and I don’t remember the details, but I remember the feeling. This is home, without it every having been home. Thorin moved past me, anger masked by narrowed eyes and squared shoulders.

“This was your plan all along, to seek refuge with our enemy.” ‘Enemy’ was such a harsh word and yet I couldn’t really find fault with his point of view. I disagree, I believe Lord Elrond will help us more than hinder us, but in Thorin’s mind it wasn’t just Thranduil that abandoned his people that day. To Thorin, it was every Elf, every person who aligns themselves with the Elves or calls the Elves friend was liable to Thorin’s distaste.

Gandalf sneered at him, scrunching his nose as he snapped at Thorin, “You have no enemies here, Thorin Oakenshield. The only ill-will to be found in this valley is that which you bring yourself.”

“You think the Elves will give our quest their blessing? They will try to stop us.” The king tilts his head, wryly calling the ancient wizard’s choices into question. Gandalf had none of it, acutely aware of what Lord Elrond would have to say.

“Of course, they will. But we have questions that need to be answered,” He walked through the party, making his way to the stone step path that led down to the first bridge. “If we are to be successful this will need to be handled with tact, and respect, and no small degree of charm, which is why you will leave the talking to me.” I rolled my eyes. Thorin went first and I followed second, taking his hand to step down as the steps became steeper and more detailed. We walked shoulder to shoulder in pairs along the narrow bridges until we came to two tall Elven statues standing guard in front of a large circular courtyard. We filed into the courtyard, slowly regrouping and breaking off to talk separately in smaller groups. I stayed near Thorin, my hand resting against his shoulder as he and Dwalin discuss escape routes. From the steps above, a young Elf passes by two guards and almost don’t recognize him.

“Mithrandir.” Lindir was the right hand of Lord Elrond and had been for some time now. I had known him when he was younger, and to think that he had risen so far was surprising. He was always so… carefree as a young Elf. The two stepped closer, speaking Quenya in hushed tones. Thorin turned his head to Dwalin and I.

“Stay sharp, and you stay behind me.” I snapped my head towards him.

“I know the people here. Lord Elrond is a kind man, he will help us I know it, please trust me.” He met my eyes with skepticism, but I stared him down, knowing I was right. Suddenly a horn sounded behind us, and the clattering of dozens of horse hoofs spooked the company.

“Close ranks!” I was pulled back into a crowd of dwarven elbows as they close in around each other. The hunting party circles us until they have is hidden by rings of Elven warriors. A man I had met only a few times in my life dismounts from the head of the hunting party and approaches Gandalf happily.

“Gandalf!” He smiled wide and it felt like I was in the presence of peace and tranquility. Like he polluted the air with a calm demeanor and made everyone feel safe. Everyone except the dwarves. Gandalf bowed and began speaking with him in Quenya, too fast for me to easily translate. I slipped my hand into Thorin’s, pressed so close to each other that no one noticed. Until I was addressed.

“(Name), Niethir iin Eryn Galen, Thranduilwen!” (name), Niethir of the Greenwood, daughter of Thranduil! Looking up, I met his smile and reciprocated a relived one of my own.

“Hér Elrond!” I bowed my head and slowly eased my way out of the group. Thorin squeezed my hand, and I stopped short of leaving from directly in front of him. He held onto me, and I held onto him. Elrond saw this but made no note of it.

“Quenyalda aryaië?” Your Quenya is improving? My cheeks flushed as I remembered the promise I made to him when I was much younger. I told him I would learn every language I could, and that I’d be able to speak to him in perfect Quenya one day. At the time, I wanted to impress both him and Thranduil.

“Paranya, au lenca.” I am learning, if only slowly.

“Naylë arya malda nyanya,” You are better than most. I smiled widely and nodded in thanks. “Si casar, carltë lenda asillo?” These dwarves, do they travel with you? I looked to Thorin quickly before looking back to Elrond.

“Lá, málonya.” Yes, my friends. He nodded and grinned. Looking past me, he focused on someone else behind me and I felt Thorin’s hand tighten in mine.

“Welcome, Thorin, son of Thrain.” Thorin came to stand beside me as he was addressed.

“I do not believe we have met.” I almost sensed haughty arrogance from Thorin, like he was waiting to make some snide comment.

“You have your grandfather's bearing. I knew Thror when he ruled Under the Mountain.”

“Indeed? He made no mention of you.” Ah. There it is. I rolled my eyes and met Elrond’s once again. The right corner of his lip quirked upwards so fast and so little that I almost missed it. Almost.

“Si gonnhirrim arldë alatulyaië imi Rivendell. Silómë merenlmë, málonlda arldë fúmë hí.” I sighed and smiled brightly, nodding happily in thanks. He turned and began walking back up the stairs but was stopped when Gloin spoke up in rage.

“What is he saying? Does he offer us insult?” He pushed his way to the front. I jostled as the others moved to make room for him. Gandalf turned to us, obviously tired of the Dwarves’ antics.

“No, Master Gloin, he's offering you food.” The Dwarves froze and suddenly turned in to whisper tightly between each other. Thorin and I leaned in, and my lips just barely brushed his cheek.

“His exact words were that you are welcomed in Rivendell, and that we may feast and sleep here tonight, but Gandalf was never good at translating.” I spoke low and soft, so that he was the only one to hear me. He grinned and turned slightly, his eyes crinkling at the edges. His lips were so close to mine, but the others had already started moving towards the stairs and there wasn’t time. He pressed our foreheads together, the side of his nose against mine, eyes closed. It lasted only a second or two, but it became my favorite thing. We were led up the stairs farther into the estate, past large columns and gorgeous waterfalls, other Elves passing us. They nodded towards me when they recognized me, and the Dwarves started to take notice. Thorin leaned into my side, the little braid that hung by his ear knocking into my shoulder.

“They know you here?” I nodded, still scanning the area as we crossed another bridge with no railings.

“I came here once a really long time ago, but it’s more likely they know me because I’m a witch, one of the last, remember?” There was a pause before he nodded, lips closed tight as if something suddenly bothered him. I saw this, but I couldn’t figure out what it could have been. Thorin was always stoic these days, always looking ahead for the danger, always thinking of what-ifs. Moments like this I remembered just how different he is now compared to when we first met. The carefree, smiling young man who led me down backstreets and alleyways got smothered by time and grief and hurt. “Thorin,” I bumped his shoulder with mine lightly, “What are you thinking?”

He wouldn’t meet my eyes, looking off in the distance, before looking down at the stone walkway. “You are the last of your kind… that never truly struck me until now. To be the last of your kind, alone in the world, without anyone who truly understands… I’m sorry.” I was shocked. I guess that made sense, though I never really thought of it like that. Yes, I was most likely, almost definitely, the last Witch in Middle Earth, but it didn’t make me as sad as it probably should have.

“Don’t be. As much as it sounds horrible, I don’t feel bad being the last.” His head snapped towards me, eyes wide and worried.

“Why-”

“Come, you are to feast with Lord Elrond. Then, you will be escorted to the bath houses. Lady Niethir, you are welcomed to the separate house for privacy.” I nodded in thanks before lowering my head to speak to Thorin quietly again.

“I’ll tell you later, Ara Nín. Let’s at least have tonight before we step back into the world.” He nodded reluctantly and took my hand in his, kissing the back before pulling me with him into the dining room with the rest of the company. 

@mrsdurin ,@capricorn-anon, @emmapotato88 , @dontaskmehowdontaskmewhy , @eilin-brillewin​ @hpthalia126 , @undecided-about-everything-ever , @dark-chxos, @artemis-the-ace, @floatingintheshire

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[izzytown]

okay so i had a request to redo my “the fellowship reacts to starbucks” post but with the company (and since this is my niche now, i’m here to provide!)

the premise is mostly the same as the other post, just my silly little headcanons on what the characters would drink at starbucks. i now present to you “the company reacts to starbucks coffee” (part 1/2)

i adore the hobbit, but even though I’ve read the book (and watched the films) a fair number of times, i’m much more well-versed with LOTR characters than i am with those from the hobbit, so bear with me.

note: will not be including gandalf as i’ve already included him in the fellowship’s post - pop over there if you’re curious!

thorin: the grumpy-ass prince himself need not trifle with complicated orders when going to the bux. in fact, i propose he only goes if he’s DRAGGED by his arms and legs by fili and kili during babysitting duty—he gets a dark roast pourover, regardless of what roast is brewed, just because he “respects coffee craft.” you will find him rolling his eyes whenever a frap is ordered, silently mumbling about how his local coffee shop under the lonely mountain is WAY better.

fili: the quieter, more thoughtful sibling, fili is hit or miss on caffeine. if he’s looking for something pretty caffeinated with flavor, i think he goes for an iced brown sugar, toffee nut latte. not too sweet, but very flavorful (just like his personality). if he ain’t feeling a lot of caffeine, he probably gets an iced black tea to have something to sip on while supervising kili's shenanigans. also, he gets a cheese danish as a little snack, it’s canon-

kili: this man is on crack. he’s a kid in a candy store when he walks into starbucks- first off, he gets a birthday cake pop EVERY time without fail (much to thorin’s bank account’s dismay). he’s okay with caffeine, but the taste of coffee is a little much for him, so he cycles through a strawberry açaí lemonade, a vanilla bean frap, a chocolate cookie crumble frap, or an iced chai with cold foam and caramel drizzle. just gallons of pure sugar in a 16oz “coffee” for this guy!

oin: now i know very little about oin, but what I do know is that he seems like he doesn’t give two shits about anyone (respectfully). to me, that sounds like someone who drinks an insane amount of espresso and could care less how long it takes to pull 8 shots. therefore, I propose he drinks a 6-8 shot espresso over ice in a venti cup, with a light splash of cream. the pedro pascal special!

gloin: dark roast is the only acceptable roast of coffee in gloin’s household, how else would gimli acquire his profound appreciation for coffee? gloin tends to go for heavier, powerful drinks, contrasting gimli’s love of a good 'ol cappuccino. gloin’s go-to if there’s no dark roast available is probably a hot black americano with a couple packets of raw sugar, keeping it classic while wanting a drink that packs a punch.

ori: this is the sweetest dwarf you ever did see, and i think his drinks reflect that. not only does he give the vibe of someone who doesn’t drink anything too caffeinated, but he also seems like he has drinks for every season. he’s happy to have a nice chai latte in the autumn, a decaf peppermint white mocha for winter, a peach tranquility tea with two honey packets during the spring, and probably a passion tea lemonade (sweetened with liquid cane) during the summer.

dori: he so slays. dori seems like a mom friend to me, rolling his eyes and being a responsible part of the company, so i’m gonna make the executive decision and say he probably gets a typical “mom” drink, which to me is an iced mocha (or black and white mocha) w/ no whip. or maybe a honey citrus mint tea if he’s feeling sick, trying to cut back on sugar (as if it’s any better for you Lmao)

part 2 is available here

[here-to-read-and-write]

Hi!! Please excuse my rambling!! I hope this is okay!💜

Can I please request a Kili x fem!healing mutant!reader where she has healing powers, and that’s why she was asked to be a part of Thorin’s Company, the Dwarves loving her as if she’s their own, seeing her as part of the family (and Bilbo of course). She’s not a fighter and is very gentle (Thorin often questioning whether she should be on this quest with them), and they’re all very protective of her. Kili and Y/n becoming especially close, sharing soft kisses when they think no one is watching, cuddling together at night (every night), and after he got shot with that poisonous arrow and she healed him, he asked if he could braid her hair… She says yes (only Fili and Bofur in the room to see, they’d be smiling so wide and telling Y/n “Welcome to the family!”🥺). When the Kili, Fili, and Thorin go off to fight Azog, Y/n, who is supposed to stay in the Mountain, hidden and safe (also ready to heal anyone who needs it, when it’s safe to), sneaks off into the middle of the battle to find them (as she can’t help but shake the feeling that something is going to happen to Kili and his family). She finds each of them (Kili, Fili, and Thorin) after they’ve been attacked by Orks, close to death, but she heals them just in time, saving all 3 Durins (this allowing the three of them to overpower Azog and win the battle, and live to tell the tale). At the dinner after the battle (the one where the humans, elves, and Dwarves + Bilbo were eating together), Thorin makes a toast to Y/n for saving their lives, and announces her engagement to Kili (Y/n being very flustered and Kili being so proud, giving her a big kiss, her burying her head in his chest🥺🥺)

Finally, it took so long to finish it.

I'm really sorry for the wait, but I love to take my time in doing things, especially requests.

Btw this was long, nad a little of a miss since I had to find away to link the events, especially since what you requested seems to happen at different times, I almost cut it to three to four parts. It was too long.

Warning: I don't know? My writing. English is my third language so...sorry for the grammar mistakes.

The only thing your ears could pick up is the soft sleepy noise of the company. They all were sleeping or at least that is what you thought, so carefully and as silently as possible you stood up zigzagging your way to the person who had stolen your heart since your eyes first meet.

He, like everyone else, had his pretty eyes closed. His arms were wide open as if he was waiting for you.

"I will always wait for you" he confessed to you, one night, causing a soft smile to bloom for days in a row. The dwarves even teased you about it, with knowing smiles.

In your eyes, there is nothing but adoration for Kili. He may or may not be your first love but he sure will be your last, because not in a million years you would love someone like your loves, your whole heart was in the palm of his hand, for him to keep no matter what will happen.

Laying by his side, his hands unconsciously hung around you, burying you deep in his chest, warming your heart and body from the cruel cold wind. The gesture caused your cheek to hit up, it was hard not to blush, when you can feel his hot breath a centimetre away from your neck, sending shivers of pleasure down your spine.

You left your head to admire his face, and to your surprise, he was already looking at you with the biggest grin, and you couldn't help but stare.

Your face turned blank, which scared Kili for a moment, you almost gave the poor boy a heart attack.

He thought he was making you uncomfortable. He only calmed when he notice your eyes, those eyes that shined with millions of stars.

Your pupils were wide, like a cat. You had an immense red blush, that only he notice now, which was caused by the little to no space between your faces.

Taking the opportunity, he stole a kiss. The kiss was gentle, warm and soft, it represented Kili.

This was Kili, your kili. You thought.

You were clinging to each other never breaking the kiss as you changed position, now you were laying on top of him. Your hand holding his hair to stop from him moving and to deepen the kiss. You flinched when his cold hands come in contact with the warm skin under your shirt.

He caressed your tense shoulders, making you moan softly as you relaxed a little. You both knew you can't take it far, since literary everyone was sleeping by your side and can wake up just by one small movement, so you sadly broke the kiss.

You lay on top of him with his hands still working their magic, it provided him with enough comfort, easing the fear in his heart, the fear of losing you.

It was hard for Kili to believe that such an amazing human with intriguing powers had chosen him over his brother and his uncle, who happened to be popular among the young girls and women. He thanked every god he knew and believed in, for sending you into his life, and he promised that he will take care of you. He won't leave you, and you won't leave him, he will protect you with his life.

You were like the light that guided him towards home, with you he understand that home was a person, not a place, and god…Once this is all done he will propose. He will worship every inch of you, and every part of you will know what it's like to be loved by a man.

Without even noticing, the two lover birds fell asleep, unaware of the ears that were listening as they swear their oaths, and they may not show it (Thorin who believed you to be unnecessary for the mission)but they were happy for both of you.

You completed each other perfectly, like two pieces of a puzzle.

**************************************************************

The days passed in a blur, and without realizing you were running away from the elven and the Orcs. Everything was a mass, that you didn't even notice the arrow coming your lover's way, and unfortunately, it hit him before you could push him out of it way.

A few minutes later about an hour, you found yourself in a human village. The weather and the sky matched your mood. Grey, from fear, doubt and sadness that was overwhelming you, causing your power to be momentarily deactivated.

"It gonna be okay" Kili groaned tooking your hands in his, and you noticed how shaky they were, yet they squeezed yours, offering some comfort.

Weren't the one supposed to do that?

Oh, how terrible he looked. All sick and sweaty while you sat there focusing on your power, pushing them to the surface but no matter your effort, it seem as if you lost them.

"No..it's not okay" You snapped your eyes turning to your intertwined fingers. How dare he say that, while lying on a table, taking each second a step towards death, nothing is going to be okay if you don't fix him.

Fili and Bofur sat a little away giving you both some space, they were the only one left to protect you. They were sure you will help Kili, and you loved him just as much as they did if not more. You wouldn't let him die.

"It's okay take your time" He winced, throwing a flirty(?) smile your way. How can he act nonchalant while his life is been sucked off him?

You looked at him for a moment, and you saw it…

He was always looking at you with so much love as if you held the world in your hand. It helped your heart calm down.

If only he knew how much he mean to you, if he died you were dying with him. you closed you eyes in frustration letting your mind surrended to the numbness, and without realizing your power travelled from your heart to the tip of your fingers, to his whole body covering him up with golden light. It looked and felt holy for the three dwarves, something out of heaven.

The moment it disappeared, you opened your eyes and to your surprise, he was like new, as if never fought a battle in his life, even the scares that adored his body were now gone, and you kissed the night your become had disappeared.

Fili and Bofur were surprised, unable to believe what their eyes just witnessed. They knew you were powerful, but this was something else. In their life they never saw something like this. How much are powerfull?

He stood too fast almost falling face first if it weren't for your body supporting his, he held your face with both of his hands, as he felt life coming back to his body, and sudenly Kili realised something…he was about to leave you, he was about to die leaving you alone. It scared him, maybe even more than it scare you. Holding you near him he turned to his brother, as if Fili could read his mind he nodded , leaving you two to drown in each other, you needed to feel him as if you were trying to conviece your brain that he was here and alive.

Kili felt the same, and it was hard on him as much as it hard on you, but he let you touch him as you please, he let your cry your heart out, letting all the stress of the situation fall as tears. He didn't dare to speak or break you mental breakdown. He held you until you calmed down.

I wish I had a partner like him Hours later, you were sniffling, wiping what is left of tears on your cheeks. You were relieved, you felt as if a weight was left off your shoulders.

**************************************************************

You were sitting on his lap, arms crossed, and eyes closed as Kili's figure caressed your head, going through your hair untangling each knot carefully not disturbing your peace. You had exhausted yourself, and Kili wasn't happy about it, as much as he appreciated the effort you put into saving him, he wanted you to rest too.

Your hair had grown longer than his, which had given him an idea "Can I braid your hair?" he whispered in your ears his hot breath caused you to shoot your eyes open. Cheek growing red. You couldn't talk afraid of what may come out of your mouth, so you nodded.

He chuckled at your reaction, he was over joyed that he has the same effect you have on him, even if he never had showned.

You both were in your won world inware of the two pair of eyes watching you.

"Oh my god! Aren't they so cute!" so they whispered to each in pure aww at the both of you. If they haven't considered you a part of their family before, congratulation they now do! They are already planning a wedding, good luck leaving now!

**************************************************************

"You can go, please?" You had a bad feeling about the fight against Azog. You knew people are about to get hurt and die, and you won't be able to help all of them, but that didn't mean it hurt less and you wished that neither of your friends was among them. It brought guilt in you, and it was eating from the inside. If only you were more powerful, maybe then you would have healed all the soldiers.

"Don't worry, I will come back" He promised, kissing your head a last goodbye before joining in the fight leaving on edge, with tense shoulders.

So it was no surprise that moment later you were running after your lover future husband. You tried to search for him, yet you never were able to find him.

Unfortunately, when you finally found him, he was in the break of death, for the second time. Not only him but Thorin and Fili too, you can hear your heart shatter in your ears as you run ignoring all the shoots around you.

You knew that if you don't hurry, instead of preparing for a marriage you will be preparing for a funeral sooner than later.

Gathering your courage you sneaked past the enemy, hands already glowing, you knew you had less than thirty seconds to heal all of them before the enemy notice you.

"Please work" You begged as you felt the energy drain out of your body going to the three dwarves, and slowly the colour of their face was back, and in no time they were running back to the fight.

Healing one dwarf was hard enough, but three at the same time, was wow..

Blackspotss appeared in your vision, and you fought as much as you could the dizziness, yet you weren't able to stand for muchlongerr before you collapse on the ground. Before you could fully for into the abyss you heard your namebeingn called by the people you considered family, even before you and Kili become a thing. They were your family not by blood, but still family.

**************************************************************

"What happened?" You groan standing up. Your head felt heavy, and it hurt so much.

Have you been hit by truck-kun or something?

You look around as much as possible, with your eyes still close from sleep. The room looked fancy, elven style. It looked so much like the guest room, the Lord Elrond let you use.

Your turn left to see the window wide open. The sky was decorated by stars that shined too brightly for you. You sigh, how did you get here? Why were you here? Didn't you all leave months ago?

Wait a second...You checked the room again. Why can't you remember, what happened after you left the?

"Oh my God, you're awake!" You were about to snap at whoever was screaming, but stopped yourself when you saw who it was.

"Darling!" Kili come running your way, hugging you so tightly you found it hard to breath, yet you didn't push him away, as he cried.

Tears fell from his eyes like rain, you were sure you could feel the wetness on your shoulder. "shh" you tried to calm him down, but he just kept crying.

"I thought you died..I-I thought you were leaving me!" His confession confused you.

You were about to die?

"What?" You tried pushed aside, but he just cling to you, explaining to you what happened, and in conclusion, you drained your body, to the point where your heart almost stopped. You were sleeping for weeks, he blamed himself, over and over again. Until, the other Dwarf come in taking him off you, which you were grateful for. They explained the rest of what happened.

You healed them completely just like you did to Kili when he was poisoned, but as you did so, it exhausted your body and your heart almost stopped, the healers had to put you into a deep slumber (coma), so you can get rest without your boy shutting down.

They did give you a lecture about putting yourself in danger, but they were restful nonetheless, even Thorin the sour dwarf apologised for underestimating you.

"Let's get married!" Kili blur out as he sat on your bed, the other had left giving the boy a pointed look before closing the door.

It was now or never. Kili thought.

That caught you off guard.

"What?" You raised an eyebrow, "Let's get married now" You laughed but stopped when you noticed his seriousness. "Excuse me?" Your wide eyes obeserved him looking for any sort of emotions, but all you could see was that he was nervous.

"I realise how close to death we are..." He played with his fingers trying to ease his beating heart, he was sure you could hear it" I never thought about marriage, but that doesn't mean I never wanted a family...Actually, I always wanted a family...A partner that wait for me and with mini kids running around looking so joyful, but The woman never found interest in me, they always go for my uncle or for my brother, but I never lost hope, and I'm grateful for that" He turned to you with the brightest smile, pushing all the air out of your lungs.

Oh my god, he's so cute I wanna die, ugh!

"What I a trying to say is.." He took your cold hand in his giving them a brief squeeze, eyes nervously looking at you, as he kneeled on the ground, and you coudln't help but gasp.

Is he going to..? Your eyes widen, your hand blocking a gasp from escaping your mouth. He answered your silent question "(Y/N) (L/N) would you please make me the happiest man, and marry me?"

It took you three minutes, and ten seconds to finally registered what he said.

Oh my god, he finally just proposed!

You jumped in his arms. Oh, my god he finally proposed. It felt like a dream come through, which it was, but that was your secret. You loved Kili t a point where it was starting to hurt you physically and mentally. He made you unable to think of anything or anyone when he is around, and when he is not. Your brain and heart were obsessed with him.

"Yes!" You screamed in his ears making him wince before chuckling, he didn't hesitate to kiss, not like he ever was. It held all his and your emotions in it. The fear of losing each other, the happiness, the excitement everything.

Unfortunately, as things got heated up the Dwarf crashed in, congratulating you, Thorin and Bilbo stood at the door, one with a smile that for the first time since you meet him had reached his ears, while the other with an apologia one.

Those sneaky bastards were listening, and as much as you were disappointed and frustrated that things didn't go your way, you were still happy, chuckling as they congratulated you with a "Welcome to the family".

How can you be not when you were about to marry the man who stole your heart, not only that but now..now you had a family that will protect you with their life and you will do the same.

**************************************************************

Thorin had organized a feast for the success. All the dwarves were happily getting drunk. there were other creatures but you only recognised the elven, the Dwarves and the humans.

You were sitting with the company. By your left side Fili was sitting talking your ear off, you right that where you fiancé was sitting holdin your wraist slowly caressing the soft materiel of the dress you were wearing tonight.

You had especially worn it, and done your hair, even though you didn't have to. You wanted to look beautiful so that his eyes can only be one of you. thankfully, his eyes never left yours, he stared at you all night with hungry eyes, that you ignored, with the most satisfied grin smirk on your face.

As you were about to take a sip of your drink, Thorin raised his cup, getting everyone's attention. Your eyes were on him, but your mind was somewhere, that until he turned the cup in your direction" I want to thank especially (Y/N) who come running to our aid...If it weren't for you none of us will be sitting here celebrating" You held your head high raising your cup in his direction "celebrating the betrothal of my nephew to this amazing woman" You almost pitted, coughing your looked down embarrassed as everyone laughed at your silliness.

This is your life and you will not exchange it for anything.

[lucigoo]

Bagginshield-tober: Day 3-Barrels

So my take on the prompt, barrles.

You can also see the colleciton here on A03

Bilbo sat happily in his office doing paperwork. Well, technically it was Thorin’s office, but as he let the paperwork pile up Bilbo knew no one would care if he was in there doing it instead. He was currently sitting looking over a report on the iron yield of the mountain, while he may not understand the product itself, he absolutely understood numbers. One wasn't the largest landowner in The Shire for nothing. 

He sat, happily humming to himself as he fixed the audits when bang! Bofur found himself falling through the door. “What in Arda, Bofur? You scared the life out of me,” Bilbo told him, annoyed. 

Bofur didn't answer, he just breathed heavily, obviously having run. Bilbo took pity on him and tutted as he tried to usher him into the chair. 

“No time, No time Bilbo, Thorin is in the throne room, alone with Thranduil.” He gasped out.

Bilbo gave a startled sound and tried to cover the dismay on his face. “When you say alone, do you mean just Thorin and Thranduil?” he asked, trying to understand how bad this situation was going to be. “Where Balin, or Dis, or even Kili if necessary?” he asked quickly, mind racing over what kind of damage control they would have to do. And by them, he meant he.

”They are all still with Bard, Thranduil isnt due for a day, he arrived early, quietly, on purpose the pointy eared prick” Bofur all but growled out.

“Yes yes, elves are bad, terrible creatures, now, who exactly is in the throne room with Thorin?” Bilbo demanded, hands on his hips, biting his bottom lip in thought. 

“Thorin, Dwalin and Gloin, with Thranduil, Legolas and the t’other elves.” Bofur answered promptly.

Bilbo couldn't help but cover his face with his hands and groan into them, of course, there three most volatile dwarves when it came to elves, and the biggest fool was the bloody king. “Fine, fine,” he said, already tired just by the thought. “Lets go stop another war”. 

~~~~<>~~~~

Bilbo stopped outside the doors of the throne room to sort himself out after his mad dash, fixing his waistcoat and his braids before walking in like he owned the place, because, he thought with a small smile, he kind of did, he supposed. 

He didn't have to look very far to find his husband, he was busy shouting at Thranduil who was happily sneering back. Bilbo sighed as he walked forward and stood between the two males arguing over who knew what now. 

His ears pricked up and a frown as he heard the end of Thorin’s rant in Khuzdul, he could pick most of it up and he turned his head and looked at Thorin. “Barrels?” he asked as he looked at his husband. 

His husband who looked down on his hobbit and felt the wind leave his sails. “Aye ghivashel, he offers us insults over barrels.” Thorin snarled out.

Bilbo held his hand up to stop Thorin’s ongoing rant, Thorin for his part snapped his mouth shut and gritted his teeth, glaring at Thranduil. Bilbo turned his head to look at the smug look on Thranduil’s face. Bilbo really wanted to scream, it was one of those days, where both males were arguing and screaming at one another. 

“Thranduil, good day, you're early.” Bilbo stated, leaving Thranduil no wiggle room for excuses.

 Instead, Thranduil, slippery git that he was motioned for Legolas who moved forward. “Yes, my son misses his bonded sister, as i do my daughter, we decided you wouldn't mind extending the hospitality of dwarves for an extra night.” He said smugly, snidely. 

Bilbo just sighed deeply as he heard Thorin take in a breath to start the arguing all over again. “You are, of course, always welcome here, and we look forward to returning the opportunity to be hosted in your home.” Bilbo said with a sicky, sweet smile as both Thorin and Tranduil said “You do?” before glaring at one another. 

Bilbo had to suppress his smile at the pair, they were like mardy little faunts on a hot day sometimes, just bickering for the sake of bickering. “Yes, we do, now, is there some business we need to attend to before I have someone escort you to your suite?” 

“Yes, there is Lord Baggins,2 Thranduil said in all pompousness. “Your king, your husband, and his Company owe me the price of 13  large, expensive barrels.” He sneered. 

Bilbo just looked at him incredulously. “Are you serious?2 he asked.

“Of course, your Company destroyed them, I wish to be reimbursed.” Thranduil demanded. 

Bilbo stood there, shocked at how petty one man could be, honestly. He stood thinking as he heard his dwarves and the elves starting bickering again. Honest, he should have become a teacher, the amount of childish arguments he had to sort out. 

“Enough” Bilbo shouted, causing everyone to look at him in shock. He rarely raised his voice, and never shouted in official settings as it was very un-hobbitlike. Bilbo found he didn't care at this moment. 

“King Thranduil, we apologise for ruining your barrels, however, as I'm sure you're aware you had a part to play in the incident too. Now, we are neighbours and a budding friendship is being forged between our kingdoms” he said sweetly, when all of a sudden his eyes narrowed, causing Thranduil to take a slight half step back. “You will get reimbursement for the barrels when I get compensation for my dwarves for a month-long illogical imprisonment. DO you want to go down this route my Lord?2 he asked with a raised eyebrow. 

Bilbo saw the sour look crossing Thranduil’s face and could imagine the gleeful one about to cross Thorin’s so he carried on. “However, we are neighbours and friends. I will send an order to the shire for 26 barrels. Made of good, strong Shire wood and you never know, I might even convince old Hamfast to fill it with the best Shire wine. As a gift of friendship and moving forward from petty squabbles if that is acceptable my Lord?” he asked, allowing Thranduil to save face and probably stopping a diplomatic incident. At least this time. 

“That is most agreeable Consort Baggins, now, i believe we were to head to our suite?” he asked as though the last conversation had not happened. Bilbo just sighed and gestured to Bofur to take the elves. Whilst he may not like them, unlike Gloin he knew to keep his mouth shut. 

Bilbo waited until Thranduil was gone and the large stone door was closed before ripping into his husband. “You rockheaded, stone dead fools. Honestly, Yavanna give me patience because Aule sure didn't give you fools' brains.” he snarled at them, refusing to give them a chance to speak. 

“I don't care, I don't care how much he insults you, sneers at you or looks down at you. We are not having a war with the elves because you and Thranduil are prideful idiots. Now, I expect you to behave for the rest of the time he is here, or I will murder you in your sleep and replace you with Dis.” he snarled as he marched out of the throne room. 

Thorin, Dwalin and Gloin all looked at one another shocked, mouths hanging open at how viscous their hobbit had become. No one said anything until Dwalin cautiously asked “how mad do you think he is? Like no baking mad?” he asked with a frown. 

Gloin looked at him in shock. “He wouldn't? Do hobbits withhold food when they are angry?” he asked incredulously.

The three looked at one another, forgot all decorum and ran after Bilbo, no grudge with an elf was worth losing Bilbo’s baking  for.