#also in general i seek out more queer focused events so i can feel like im in a

[peachmoonn]

No one should ever let autism stop them from hitting the club. i like to hit the club in the most neurodivergent way possible. all i have to do is

- put all my important belongings (phone, keys, wallet) in my front pockets or in a fanny pack

- keep my hands in above pockets or on fanny pack AT ALL TIMES!!!!!! to make sure i’m not getting ROBBED!!!!!!! this helps alleviate some of the anxiety of being around so many strangers

- wear earplugs (the silicone kind that fit my ear holes and dont drive me fucking insane)

- stay completely sober the entire time (if i drink i get sleepy and then i want to go home)

- dance hard as fuck (it is dark so no one can judge how i behave inside my own skin) (you HAVE to go somewhere where the dj is halfway decent im begging you to support local djs who do cool music that makes you want to dance) (for me that is the only point of club)

and that is my play by play for enjoying the clurb as a sensory-seeking experience rather than a terrifying overstimulating nightmare !

[johannestevans]

Where do I find the queer people?

Making friends and finding social & community spaces as an LGBTQ+ adult.

Originally published with Prism & Pen. Also on my Patreon.

Photo by Brett Sayles via Pexels.

A friend and I recently went to a Queer Open Mic night after I saw it advertised on the same afternoon. While we were on the way back, she asked about how I’d found it.

“I just feel like you always know loads of queer events that are on,” she said, “and I don’t know how to begin to find them.”

I sat down with her a few weeks later and showed her some of the ways I find events, regular or otherwise, and where I look for others — especially given that on social media in the past few days I’ve seen a few people talking about the difficulty of finding and meeting with new queer people when not online.

I thought it might be useful to put it together here.

It’s quite hard with the pressure on and elimination of many third spaces to go out and easily meet people, and given that most of us use a lot of online socials and dating apps, it can feel difficult to seek out and engage with in-person spaces without knowing exactly what the protocol or format of the event is going to be.

Especially given that many people are still more isolated than they were before the start of the Covid pandemic, and/or struggle with seeking out events for themselves having finished school or university or other more structured environments, there can be a lot of anxiety about attending events or meeting new people. But it’s worth it to remember that pretty much everyone else is in a similar spot, and there’s nothing weird or unusual about wanting to make friends or have social time with others.

I am based in the North of England and generally go between the UK and Ireland. So this guide might be less useful depending on where you are. Obviously, in countries with more repressive legislation on queer identity, community groups will by definition be far more underground. Even in areas where this isn’t the case, some of these suggestions might be more viable than others depending on how densely populated your area is, how accessible different venues and events are, and how active your local queer communities are. So, just take what’s good for you and leave the rest.

Finding Local Queer Community Groups

In your search engine, put in simple search terms — [queer] [group] in [my area].

If you can, narrow your search to websites updated in the last 6 months to 2 or 3 years — you’ll sometimes find a website from six or seven years ago where the events haven’t been running for half that when you were already excited about it.

Search your town, city, or county first, and then widen your search — I normally initially look for Bradford and Leeds respectively, but then might broaden my search to West Yorkshire or even North England depending on the time of year and if I’m more willing to travel for certain events, e.g. looking up summer events around Pride, or specific holiday events if you’re looking at Halloween, Christmas, New Year’s, etc.

Combine:

“Queer”, “LGBT” or “LGBTQ”, “Trans”, “Gay Men’s”, “Lesbian”, “Transgender”, “Transsexual”, “Gay Rights” or similar terms

With:

“Charity”, “Support Group”, “Social Space”, “Community Space”, “Meetup”, “Society”, and similar terms

Swap around the terms and find what language seems to be used in your area — remember that depending on the age group and demographic you’re looking at or for, there might be terms you prefer.

I personally search for a lot of gay men’s groups because the average age tends to be a lot older and focused more on the experiences and social spaces of men who love men rather than general queer spaces, which I find can be a bit too young and fast-paced for my speed.

In general, I find that there’s a loose separation between younger trans and queer social groups, which tend to be a mix of differing identities and ages but with a big emphasis on young adults in the 18–25 area, and then specific gay men’s or lesbians’ groups, which will have a wider swathe of ages and might be a little bit less online.

I understand the fear some people have of these spaces being more transphobic than younger spaces — that’s not personally been my experience, as transphobia and lateral bigotry might happen in any social space, but unfortunately, you just don’t know the specifics of an event or a group until you get there and actually meet and talk to the people.

Some charities or community groups that run a variety of spaces might have specific age or identity guidance on group titles — some might be particularly for younger or older people, be for trans people more than cis people, and some might focus on particular sub-communities, such as BIPOC queer groups or specific religious or ethnic meetups, disabled queer groups, etc.

You also might find meetups that are centred around certain hobbies, professions, or interests — boardgames or Magic the Gathering, Doctor Who or fantasy novels, medical professionals or blacksmiths, etc, depending on how big the area you’re in is and how populous it is.

If you are already a member of an institution or society, whether that’s your school or university, your union, some workplaces, your temple or other religious institution, etc, you might find that there are already events running for you!

Finding Queer Events Online

There are almost certainly queer events on, and they’re probably advertised, but where do you find them?

What’s annoying about the Internet as it exists, corporate online spaces and otherwise, is that most events will be posted in one or two spaces out of hundreds. The good ones will sometimes be hard to find because there’s a bunch of shitty advertising in the way, and because individuals and small charity or community advertisers don’t necessarily know about things like search engine optimisation or how to make a good, searchable post. There will be really cool events that are advertised online, but just aren’t tagged or easy to find.

This means that it’s worth looking often but keeping it casual — glancing through the top page for events that might be coming up or meet some keywords, but if most of what you see is ads, just leave it and move on. Digging through for the good events in busy areas that are also ad-heavy can take ages and might not even turn up much.

If you find socials for local community groups or charities, even if they don’t run events themselves, they might regularly share other local events or cool ones, so it can be worth following them!

Ditto for other queer people in your community — follow local artists, performers, academics, creators, public speakers, craftspeople, or any local community leaders or public figures, and see if they share and boost local events.

They might boost special interest events that are of interest to you if you follow people who share certain communities or interests. If, for example, you have an interest in lolita fashion and follow queer lolita dressers in your area or in areas you can travel to, they might post events that are of interest to them and maybe to you — whether that means specific lolita events, other clothing and fashion events like gothic or steampunk markets and shows, or even anime cons or renaissance faires or whatever.

Obviously searching on social media can help — looking for keywords like “queer event” or “LGBT social” on one site or other can be especially good if it’s a site where you can localise your search results, such as Facebook or Instagram.

With that said, Facebook and Instagram are increasingly difficult sites to use given how much they’re overwhelmed by sponsored and corporate posts as well as spam and bot posts. So, it’s generally worth it more when you focus on either events in smaller and limited areas, such as small towns, or when you’re looking for crossing over of different areas of interest, such as particular queer hobbyist or interest groups. When you start looking for broader spectrum events in a busier or more populous area, you can get inundated by spam and copy-and-paste duplicate ads that have all been promoted. But it’s still worth it to have a glance and see if anything is up at the top!

Sites and apps like Eventbrite or TicketSource, or equivalents in your area, will often let you search for specific events . As with social media, these sites can have the same problem of sponsored events coming up first, and annoyingly you can’t block particular event providers or organisers to make sure they don’t show in your search results if they’re not your thing.

Use every option that comes up and see if you can cross search where you can — pick a particular location or area, click on free or paid events, pick events at certain times, pick a certain kind of event, add in tags like LGBTQ or similar if it’s a site that allows it, etc.

If an event comes up that you like the idea of, note it down, then look the organizer up on social media and see if they run or share other events.

Looking for local tourism sites will let you search for other local events as well — especially if you live in a city or regularly visit one, they’ll often have a What’s On page or a Visit [Blank] website or equivalent, and you can search through that — most of them will have cultural events or a specific LGBTQ section you can glance through.

Here’s the Visit Bristol site, for example:

What’s On in Bristol — VisitBristol.co.uk Click here to find out What’s On in Bristol!…Get the latest information on the latest Events, Festivals, Carnivals…visitbristol.co.uk

For obvious reasons, sites like most of the above will focus on paid events, especially evening and party events. Pub quizzes, drag events, bingo nights, balls, drinks offers, parties, etc.

These events aren’t for everybody — and if they’re not for you, focus on events that take place, if not in cafés and restaurants, then in libraries, universities, museums, and other public buildings.

Queer Events Locally Advertised In-Person

Wait, do people still do that?

Look for poster and notice boards in:

Libraries, museums, community centres, university lobbies

Vintage and alternative clothes stores, music venues, etc

Your temple, church, or other religious institutions

Gay bars, queer cafés, LGBTQ centres, queer bookshops

Doctor’s offices, GUM clinics, and sexual health clinics

Anywhere else you see a noticeboard with events showing!

Also look on flag poles or in windows around your local gay bars or businesses if you have any, generally around the gay village if there’s one to go through.

How do you know the events are good? How do you know they’re legit?

How old does the poster look? Do you see many copies of it around?

Look for dates for the event(s) they’re advertising on the poster, and then look up the venue the events are meant to happen at. Do the dates match? Is it a regular event? Is the event showing on the venue’s website or social media?

Is the event run by a local group, collective, or charity? When you search them, do they have socials or a site of their own? Do they seem active?

If a local queer poster gives you socials, check those socials out — do they have any followers you’re familiar with? Do they post their venues publicly and have defined and public meeting times? Do they seem to have active and engaged commenters? Is there a face or faces behind the social media, or are they anonymous?

If an event is run by anonymous people, or if it seems like they don’t have many followers on social media or very active ones, that might be a bit more suspicious — ditto if an event just gives you a phone number but not any further identifying info.

It’s not inherently suspicious for a queer event to be at an undisclosed location, because of course people do want to ensure some safeguarding and vet people before they come, but if it’s an undisclosed location in combination with anonymous organising, that might be a bit suspicious, and should probably be avoided.

Finding Queer People in Specific Hobby or Other Community Spaces

You don’t have to go to queer-specific events to meet other queer people — any hobby or community you can think of, there’s probably queer people in attendance.

If you’re in a busier or more populous area, say there are 5 events that centre around the same hobby — of those 5, some of them will have more queer people than others, and it might be worth checking them out just to see if you click with anyone there.

My partner and I attend queer-specific board-game evenings that are run out of gay bars or by queer clubs, but pretty much any board-game night is likely to have one or two queer people knocking about, whether they know or would identify themselves as LGBTQ+ off the bat or not.

While there are obviously more open queer people at the queer events, I would say that when we went to a local board-game night run by older straight guys, about a quarter of the attendees were older queer people.

Of my queer friends, pretty much all of them have varied interests and attend different groups or clubs with a lot of other queers knocking about without them being labelled or explicitly queer events — knitting and crocheting, computer coding, electronic music and DJing, fandom, blacksmithing, glassblowing, stand-up comedy, improv, cooking, gardening, board games, cosplay and historical costuming, LEGO, live-action roleplay, tabletop roleplaying games, Magic the Gathering, Yu-Gi-Oh, and other trading card games, poker, burlesque, sports games and clubs, swimming, cycling, fishing, photography, book clubs, bug collecting, birdwatching, weaving, painting, sculpture, pottery, video games, singing, songwriting, poetry…

The list goes on.

Hell, half the people I know seem to go and meet new dates at the local climbing wall, where it seems like all the lesbians and gay guys are crawling all over one another. Another friend of mine attends their local WI, and have met other queer people there.

Other Tips

Remember you can meet people on dating and hook-up apps and that doesn’t necessarily have to be for sex and relationships, whether that’s Grindr, Her, Lex, etc — or you can ask hook-ups and casual dates where they go or if there are local events they think are good or fun. Poly people are particularly useful for this, because they’ll often have a whole network of regular events crossing over and diverging.

If you’re nervous about going to an event alone and you don’t have anybody to go with you, it can be worth checking it out on socials first and see if you have any mutual friends with people that are going — if not, it’s worth heading along anyway, because people might well speak to you before you have to open the conversation with them.

Community groups will often have icebreakers or sessions where people swap names, pronouns, and basic introductions, and that can ease the way into getting used to the space.

If you see somebody else on their own who seems nervous to talk to people, they can be good to approach and say, hey, I also don’t know anyone here, what brings you here? And so on. Remember, other people are pretty much always in the same boat as you.

For me, one of the biggest anxieties about going to new events alone is the fact that I’m disabled and dependent on public transport, and that combo can make it tough on me if I get to a place and it’s inaccessible or just not my speed, and then I have to sort of immediately turn heel and leave, but wait ages for a bus in the meantime. I’ve missed more than one event I was really excited about just because transport didn’t line up for me.

Some considerations to keep in mind when you look for events:

Is the event free or paid? Is this clearly marked? Do you need to buy tickets in advance?

How recent is the posting about the event? Is it posted on a web page or a social media page? Are there recent comments or engagement on the entry? If there is a contact for the event, is it active and responsive?

Is this event regular or recurrent? Is it for a special occasion, and does it have sister events or concurrent events?

Is the event exclusively online, exclusively in-person, or do they change between the two formats? Would you prefer to attend online before you attend in-person?

Do you want to go to a closed and more private group — for example, one that has you message them for the time and location, seems to have capped attendee limits, seems to have a regular community. Or do you want to attend a more casual event in a larger, open space where people might not notice as much as you come and go? Is it going to be very crowded or more spaced out?

Where is the event located, and will you be comfortable in that venue? Is it in a community building such as a charity space, community group, religious institute, school, or university? Is it in a café, restaurant, pub, bar, club, or late-night venue? Is it an explicitly or dedicated queer space? If you are not out to other members of your community, will going into this space reveal that you might be a member of a queer group?

Is the venue age-restricted, and will it require ID? If you must provide ID, will providing your ID in a dead name or in a different gender presentation to your current one be anxiety-inducing or a potential problem for you?

How accessible is the venue to you? Is it walkable, on a regular bus route, or does it have appropriate parking for you? Does it have ramps or elevators? Is it well-ventilated, and does it have a HVAC or other air filtration and purification protocol? Is masking enforced, and/or are masks provided? If you might be watching something together, is there a hearing loop, will there be subtitles on a screening? Is there a first aider at the event? Does the venue serve food or drink, or provide refreshments?

If you are attending alone and have specific needs or requirements, or might need to leave abruptly, is there someone you can let know at the event, such as a first aider or community leader? Are there regular buses, a taxi rank, or online taxi access if you need to quickly head home? Have you let someone else know where you are going, just as a safety concern?

Is the event activity-based, or is it a space where people just sit and talk? Would one or the other of these feel more natural or comfortable to you? Do you have to bring your own activity, such as with a craft or knitting circle, or are supplies provided, such as boardgames or a screening?

Does the group or host for the event(s) have social media? Do they advertise the regular events on socials, or have a newsletter, or some other helpful reminder system?

Most community events will be free, but if it’s an activity group or society, or if it’s a private event, especially one where they buy equipment or supplies, there might be an up-front ticket or access fee, a membership fee or a collection jar or similar — most events will tell you in advance if there is a fee or if they might request a donation.

Most importantly, like… Have fun.

If it sucks, hit the bricks — there’s no obligation to stay anywhere if it’s not fun or doesn’t satisfy you in the way you were hoping.

There’s always other events out there, and you’re very unlikely to truly be the only gay in the village, even if it sometimes feels that way. Good luck!

[kamreadsandrecs]

Title: Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation (Mo Dao Zu Shi) Vol. 3 Author: Mo Xiang Tong Xiu Genre/s: danmei, xianxia, historical, fantasy, mystery, queer romance, romance Content/Trigger Warnings: death, violence, body horror, emotional abuse, death of parents, forced marriage, arranged marriage Summary (from publisher website): The bloody war against the Wen Clan once led Wei Wuxian to seek power in demonic cultivation, and the dark acts he committed drove a wedge between him and Lan Wangji. Now, those old sins come back to haunt him as his reincarnated identity is revealed to the cultivation world. But even as the other clans call for Wei Wuxian’s death, Lan Wangji stands by him, making Wei Wuxian realize what he took for disapproval in the past might have been a much deeper emotion. Buy Here: https://sevenseasentertainment.com/books/grandmaster-of-demonic-cultivation-mo-dao-zu-shi-novel-vol-3/ Spoiler-Free Review: BOY WAS THIS A READ! So the previous volumes have had a tendency to jump between the past and present quite easily and casually (which, kudos to the translators, they were able to handle quite deftly, and kudos too to the author for managing to make things coherent despite the frequent jumps between timelines) but this volume DEFINITELY focuses more on the past than the last two volumes, with huge swathes of the volume being devoted to moments pre-, during, and post-Sunshot Campaign. The emphasis is mostly on Wei Wuxian’s relationship with his adopted siblings Jiang Cheng and Jiang Yanli, which is complicated by the relationship between his adopted father Jiang Fengmian and his wife Madam Yu. It’s a very sad, tragic story that I won’t elaborate on due to spoilers, but I’ve been informed that if I feel the need to bawl my eyes out, I should watch how the drama adaptation of this series portrays certain specific events in this volume. Given how I feel about those events WITHOUT having seen the drama version yet, I can only imagine just how heartwrenching they’d be when acted out. Speaking of drama (of a different sort), this volume also REALLY expands on the romantic connection between Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji - mostly by playing up the fact that Lan Wangji is a VERY poor communicator (his own brother admits to this!) and Wei Wuxian is SO VERY BAD at reading the room. I joked with my friend that the real heroes here are the people around them who have to watch their romance (such as it is) unfold - mostly Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng, who have front-row seats to the two-person circus that their siblings are in. But that being said, my friend and I also got to discussing a crucial theme that runs throughout the course of the series, but which really gets highlighted here: the idea of a “right” path versus a “wrong” or “deviant” path. This is often associated with cultivation in the series (with most people saying Wei Wuxian’s cultivation is “demonic” and therefore “wrong”), but also applies to how one lives one’s life in general. Said friend remarked that this was associated with Confucian ideals and values, with the “right” path aligning with those values and ideals, and “wrong” paths being anything that didn’t align with those ideals and values. I don’t think I can speak to how true or accurate this is, given how I have minimal cultural connection to the Filipino-Chinese community and Chinese culture as a whole, but given a quick (and likely woefully insufficient) google research spree, I think this aligns quite well with what I’ve read so far. This aligns very well with another thing she pointed out: how we, as westernized readers, tend to view Wei Wuxian in a positive light, thinking his tendency to innovate is something laudable. This runs contrary with the Lans’ point of view, and the point of view of many of the cultivators in this series: innovation is questionable at best, and dangerous at worst. While someone with a more westernized perspective would view Wei Wuxian as a positive figure, others with less western views might see him as heroic, but tragic: an example of what happens when someone takes power by any means possible, no matter the cost. With this in mind it’s becoming easy to see why Wei Wuxian’s trajectory around the time of the Sunshot Campaign and beyond is one of meteoric heights, followed by a sharp and catastrophic fall: a fall which is considered entirely justified, if one chooses to see it from a certain perspective. Still, despite this framing, the author does not always frame adherence to tradition as a positive thing, especially in interpersonal relationships. Adherence to tradition, after all, is what led to the unhappy marriages portrayed in this volume (including one I didn’t expect). Given that the romance between Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji doesn’t quite adhere to tradition, does that mean they stand a better chance at happiness? Gonna have to read the rest of this series to find out I guess - and I am honestly looking forward to that. Rating: five lotus blossoms (for Reasons) Thoughts (spoilers under the cut):

- While I was messaging my friend she commented how the Jiangs had such a tragic marriage, and how it did an awful number on Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian. I later remarked how the Lans probably had a better marriage, given how Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji turned out - and my friend, bless her, DID NOT tell me the awful awful truth until I got to it. Not gonna explain any  further because it is GENUINELY WTF, but that whole thing has convinced me that there are NO happy marriages in this series. AT ALL.

[queermediastudies]

The Danish Girl: yet another queer drama with a depressing ending

Review by: Kaitlin S.

SPOILER ALERT

The Danish Girl is a romantic drama loosely based on a true story of a transgender woman in the 1920s. It follows the transition of an artist named Einar Wegener into Lili Elbe with the support of her wife Gerda. Both Einar and Gerda were painters though Einar focused on landscapes whereas Gerda preferred portraits. One day, Gerda’s model was running late so she asked her husband to stand in for them wearing a pair of women’s shoes and holding up a dress so she could continue working. This posing as a woman seems to reawaken Einar’s desire to be a woman. Gerda lovingly supports Einar, helping them dress up as a woman and going out to events as things get more serious with Einar wishing to surgically transition to become Lili Elbe. While worried about what people may think or say, Gerda supports her as Lili has become a prominent and well known muse in her paintings. When seeking out doctors, many labeled Lili as crazy and tried to get her locked into an asylum until they headed to a different country and found a doctor who was willing to do the risky surgeries. Lili’s first surgery goes well and instills more confidence but also dysphoria as she still doesn’t feel quite right in her body. This makes Lili rush to have the second surgery but complications ensue. Infections run through Lili’s body and she gets to sit outside one last time with Gerda and mentions how she feels totally herself before she passes away.

This movie was released in 2015 and is said to be a biographical drama based on Lili Elbe’s life, it is actually more of a fictionalized retelling of her story. The movie itself is based on the book of the same name, David Ebershoff. While this author is part of the queer community, he appears to have been given a lot of free reign over this story and the subsequent movie adaptation. Despite The Danish Girl being a unique movie that highlights an important life journey, it must be acknowledged that as it departs from the norm, it is not “ideologically “pure”, politically progressive and ideal, or even liked” by viewers (Cavalcante, 2017). This movie attempted to do quite a lot and while some elements were successful, major shortcomings have to be addressed as well.

Before delving into the shortcomings and failures of this movie, it is only right to point out what was done well. To begin, Eddie Redmayne did a pretty good job in showing Lili’s transition along with superb acting. In a few different interviews, Redmayne did acknowledge the potential backlash that he could face for playing a transgender character, admitting that he was grateful for the opportunity to play the role, hoping that one day there would be more queer actors/actresses and that one should be able to play any sort of role as long as it is done with respect (Puchko, 2015). He also did conduct a lot of research and had many conversations with transgender women to get a modern day grasp on their stories before attempting to play Lili Elbe.

In terms of story, there appear to major elements that most transgender people go through highlighted. There are times when Lili hears her deadname and has to pretend that it doesn’t bother her as she is not and can’t really be out. She instead claims that she is Einar’s cousin so she can avoid the questions and everything. Lili also struggled with gender dysphoria up until the end of the movie following her transition where she says that she feels “entirely herself” (Hooper, 2015). It also shows a lot of what it was like to be queer during that time as when Lili is seeking help, she is quickly labeled as homosexual, schizophrenic and otherwise just crazy. In the early 1900s, if a man was attracted to another man, they actually had a female soul trapped in their body and was labeled as homosexuality until the term transgender was coined. During that time, it was also considered a sin and an illness to be homosexual. People could be sent to asylums or prisons just for that. (Benshoff & Griffin, 2004). Lili was shunned and outcast for seeking help to feel like herself, just like some still are to this day. Unfortunately, these more accurate representations end up tarnishing the movie as a whole due to their inconsistencies.

Overall, some major shortcomings are related to Elbe’s story being passed around too much along with inaccuracies in terms of what reality actually was like in that time. The 1920s was not as accepting of transgender people as most are today and so, one of The Danish Girl’s major shortcomings was in that Lili was able to avoid most persecution. While it is possible that she was able to be careful and avoid any dangers, the movie leaves some major holes as Einar is practically erased and not a single person voices any question or concern about that. Along with that, Lili is never really misidentified and only faces slight problems in the forms of doctors diagnosing her as crazy and one scene where she is attacked by two homophobes while walking. These inaccuracies are miniscule though when compared to how jumbled Lili’s story became in the movie.

https://www.express.co.uk/celebrity-news/566115/Eddie-Redmayne-beaten-The-Danish-Girl-Brussels-Einar-Wegener 

Obviously, this story initially began with a real life which was then chronicled into a narrative by Lili Elbe, titled Man Into Woman: The First Sex Change. This was published in 1931, three months after her death (Caughie et al., 2020). Nearly 70 years later, David Ebershoff wrote The Danish Girl, a fictional novel loosely based on Elbe’s life. Ebershoff did admit that it was not an attempt to tell a true story as he instead made up most of the inner details about Lili Elbe and other characters. From there, 15 years later, the novel was adapted into a film of the same name, starring Eddie Redmayne. With so much time having elapsed from when Lili was alive and countless translations and adaptations of her story, the movie is the result of a giant game of Telephone (Colangelo, 2020). The true story ends up becoming quite convoluted and yet it is still marketed as a biographical drama film.

The Danish Girl truly should not be considered a biogeographical film. Despite bringing in elements of the real story and life of Lili Elbe, the story does not even closely resemble what is known of her life. The drama label does fit though as this movie is designed to be emotional. As Doty explained in Making Things Perfectly Queer (1993), melodramas are inherently queer and linked with the community and are designed with conventions that “encourage queer positioning as they exploit the spectacle of heterosexual romance… and traditional gender roles gone awry” (p. 15). The movie plays on heterosexual romance and gender roles gone awry as a once heterosexual relationship is turned on it’s head as Lili starts her transition. It also transforms the gender and relationship roles of Lili and Gerda as Gerda ends up teaching Lili a lot about dressing and appearing feminine, almost like she was teaching a daughter instead of her husband. Eventually, their relationship deteriorates and changes further as they are not really a traditional couple but are still companions and support for one another. This movie may have not been a good possible representation of a transgender story as many elements fell flat but a clear effort was made to try and include some realistic elements faced by transgender people worldwide.

Personally, I find this movie to be a decently cute drama for background noise but focusing on it made me notice how many things were done poorly. It is a queer film for sure and does some justice in trying to bring a real story to life but so many things are omitted or softened, almost to make it more palatable to a heteronormative audience. There aren’t really scenes where Lili appears to be caught in between herself and Einar appearance wise or facing much of reality. Another major criticism of the movie itself, not Lili’s story, is that her character just dies at the end. There is a really poignant scene where Lili admits that she feels like herself before mentioning she’d dreamed of being a baby in her mother’s arms where she was Lili from the start and moments after she says this, she passes away (Hooper, 2015). It fits the common theme of queer stories not having a happy ending but honestly, with how many creative liberties were taken, it would have been nice to go one step further and brighten the ending rather than just ending on a somber note. There’s only one scene following this in which the scarf that Gerda had gifted Lili and then got back after her death blows away in the wind and Gerda believes that it’s just Lili being freed. While that is a sweet thought, personally, I feel like that attempts to make a point that a transgender person can never really be freed from their past until they are dead, which I believe could be pretty harmful to the queer community. This movie is not designed to be a bright or uplifting queer story despite the elements that make it seem that way. It instead pushes some harmful ideas along with a false retelling of someone’s real life. I believe that there has got to be some better queer movies out there that are more beneficial to the community and less problematic.

References:

Benshoff, H. & Griffin, S. (2004). General Introduction. In Queer cinema the film reader (pp. 1–15). introduction, Routledge. Taylor & Francis Group.

Cavalcante, A. (2017). Breaking Into Transgender Life: Transgender Audiences’ Experiences With “First of Its Kind” Visibility in Popular Media. Communication, Culture & Critique, 10(3), 538–555. https://doi.org/10.1111/cccr.12165

Caughie, Pamela L., Emily Datskou, Sabine Meyer, Rebecca J. Parker, and Nikolaus Wasmoen, eds. Lili Elbe Digital Archive. Web. 2020, Oct. 13. http://www.lilielbe.org

Colangelo, H. (2020, Jan. 26). ‘The Danish Girl’ and The Tragic Mistreatment of Transgender History. Medium. https://medium.com/@harmonymoon/the-danish-girl-and-the-tragic-mistreatment-of-transgender-history-e5803187f84f

Doty, A. (1993). Something Queer Here. In Making things perfectly queer: Interpreting mass culture (pp. 2-16). Minneapolis u.a.: Univ. of Minnesota Press.

Earnshaw, J. (2015, April 24). Eddie Redmayne is viciously attacked as he films The Danish Girl in Brussels. Retrieved October 15, 2020, from https://www.express.co.uk/celebrity-news/566115/Eddie-Redmayne-beaten-The-Danish-Girl-Brussels-Einar-Wegener

Hooper, T. (Director). (2015). The Danish Girl [Motion Picture]. United Kingdom: Universal Pictures.

Puchko, K. (2015, Nov. 24). Eddie Redmayne Talks Backlash, Trans Representation and the Power of the Male Gaze in ‘The Danish Girl’. Indiewire. https://www.indiewire.com/2015/11/eddie-redmayne-talks-backlash-trans-representation-and-the-power-of-the-male-gaze-in-the-danish-girl-50373/

[womenandfilm5]

I Shot Andy Warhol (1996) is a dynamic, true crime, avante garde film that explores the history and complexity of the relationship between famous artist Andy Warhol and radical feminist Valerie Solonas. The true events depicted in this film are told through a mixture of narratives that both highlight the socio-political climate of the 1960s and the struggle for female identifying empowerment. I thought it was particularly interesting that the film was first intended to be a documentary about Valerie Solonas, but the filmmakers could not find enough footage of her, nor any individuals to speak about her. Throughout the film, the various narrative perspectives mirror a documentary styled memoir. Mary Harron tells Valerie’s narrative using a combination of flashback narratives, self recorded home videos of ‘Valerie’ reading from her own Manifesto as it pertains to the current storyline, and an unnamed character reading Valerie’s file referring to her as ‘the patient’. The last narrative technique allows the viewers to gain some context surrounding both Valerie’s intentions and behaviors. The unnamed narrator discloses Valerie’s history with being molested, prostitution, homosexual activity, and ultimately her belief in ‘the natural superiortiy of women over men’. These biographical narratives ultimately illustrate a much bigger picture than just the relationship between the two.  . The key themes highlighted in I Shot Andy Warhol include superiority, ironic male validation, radical feminism + matriarchy, mental illness, revolution, lesbianism, and revenge.  . Valerie’s detrimental motives as a protagonist in this film are driven by her attitudes toward female superiority over men. Valerie’s constant push to educate the masses on her S.C.U.M Manifesto (Society for Cutting Up Men) is bound by the idea that women are biologically superior. Within this superiority complex is a duality of anti-man rhetoric, paired with using men for her advantage when she needs to. I found it ironic that while Valerie is so anti man, a recurrent theme in the film is the chase for male validation; especially Andy. From the first time Andy Warhol’s name is mentioned in the film, Valerie is desperate to get Andy’s attention in hopes that his connections and artistry will help her spread her radical views through media. Valerie constantly pushes her beliefs onto Andy and even gives him the only other copy she has of her screenplay for him to read. Even after begging Andy to read it, he dodges Valerie’s push for production but still holds onto her beloved copy. This stands as a symbol of  Andy still holding a piece of ownership over her but refusing to give her the validation she is chasing. As mentioned in the original report, Valerie’s erratic behavior and radical beliefs stem from a comorbidity of mental illness, likely OCD and Schizophrenia. It is revealed at the end that Valerie is sent to a ‘Hospital for the Criminally Insane’ following the shooting. While it is unclear to the audience whether or not Valerie realizes her diagnosis, Valerie’s mental health is obvious to the other characters. Valerie sees herself as a revolutionary, while others (specifically men) consistently label Valerie as a ‘lunatic’ and insane for her beliefs. There is a wide gap in perspective from Valerie’s view of herself versus other’s interpretation of her.  . The cinematic aspects of the film were what captivated me the most while watching. One recurrent technique throughout the film was the specific and deliberate use of the color red, red lighting in particular.  The first time Valerie visits The Factory trying to find Andy, the lighting surrounding her is a shadowy, transparent red glimmer focused on her face. When Valerie goes to meet with the publisher to sign her book contract, she specifically picks out and wears a red dress. After being ‘excommunicated’ from Andy and his group and going to confront him, there is dark red light surrounding the group as they walk out of a tunnel. However, when Valerie’s face enters the frame to speak to Andy, the red light behind the group disappears and the light shown on Valerie’s face is harsh and bright white. The repetitive incorporation of the color red stands in as a symbol for many emotions and moods, such as: embarrassment, frustration, humiliation, bloodlust, romance, need for validation, and superiority.  . The visual techniques during the party scene at The Factory were especially noticeable. The bright, saturated, revolving and color changing lights stood to amplify the mood of the party for those in attendance. The mixture of light movement paired with diverse colors and patterns added a layer of intoxication to the scene and reflected how the party-goers were feeling under the influence.  . I think the most important cinematic aspect in this film were the deliberate mirroring shots to tell different aspects of the same narrative. During the scene of the party at The Factory, both Andy and Valerie are surrounded by people but standing alone. They both slowly look up and make eye contact with one another from across the room as the camera pans in on each individual. The last scene of the film depicts Andy standing in a crowd surrounded by others, when he hears a popping sound reminiscent of a gunshot. This triggers Andy to turn around as he sees Valerie standing alone directly across the street. The two once again make eye contact, and in the same angle as before, the camera pans into both individuals’ reactions. Andy stares nervously and Valerie disappears after a car passes by. While both shots mirror one another in technique, the emotion and context behind both are drastically different. The first implicates admiration and need for validation, while the final shot indicates fear from Andy and accomplishment from Valerie. . Many aspects of the film are reflective of the time period being portrayed in the film. As mentioned in the original report, this film took place during the Vietnam War in the 1960s, where the socio-political climate was extremely volatile and filled with protest and anti-government and anti-war sentiments. While I do not think anti-war attitudes were presented at the forefront of this film, or even mentioned more than once, I do think that Valerie’s passionate and revolutionary motives were inspired from the political climate during this time period.  . The set design and costumes were also extremely reflective of the 1960s. The ‘retro’ aesthetic of this time period can be found within sets such as the old fashioned classic diner and especially The Factory. A ‘cinema fact’ on the back of the DVD case revealed that Harron and the filmmakers were given permission to reproduce some of Andy Warhol’s paintings and silk screen for the set, but they had to destroy them after filming.  One could argue that the set of The Factory is more reminiscent of Andy Warhol’s artistry, which is ultimately a reflection of his peak during this time period.  . Even attitudes of the characters were reflective of the oppression of certain identities during this time, especially lesbians and trans people. Valerie is consistently degraded by the men around her for being a lesbian, most harshly insulted when she was the only woman in the room. Feminine heterosexual women portrayed in the film were also degraded and stereotyped, but in a hypersexualized way that the men validated as attraction. Degradation towards Valerie came from a homophobic standpoint that was not based on attraction. For example, when Valerie appeared on the television interview, the man rudely demeaning her while discussing the ‘controversial’ topic of homosexuality cited the Kinsey Reports. Debuted in the late 1950s, the Kinsey Reports introduced the concept of sexuality as a spectrum and changed the way a lot of people viewed homosexuality in general, for better or worse.  . I think one thing that stuck out to me the most throughout the course of the film was that it seemed as if S.C.U.M. and its manifesto was inclusive of all womxn identities. Even the ad in the newspaper seeking actors to audition for the screenplay “Up Your Ass” directly welcomed ‘butch dyke lesbians’ and queer people. However, towards the end of the film when Valerie was convinced that Candy had worked with Andy to set her up, Valerie cruelly invalidated Candy’s identity as a transwoman and called her a man. This invalidation is not only misogynistic and exclusive to trans people but is especially demeaning to say to a friend who originally brought you into the scene. At first I was excited and even surprised to see trans representation within the film. Although it was disappointing to see transphobia shine through, especially from Valerie, this type of fear and intolerance was common and is still common surrounding trans identities. . It was fairly hard for me to actually get a physical copy of and view this film, and I believe it was well worth the difficulty. This film is an intimate storyline of a historic and iconic incident that stands to narrate more than just a dynamic relationship. – ECo

[silver-leaf-girl]

so I read Record of a Spaceborn Few

so, I just finished the audiobook of Becky Chambers Record of Spaceborn Few last night, and haha do I have some feelings. it is a beautiful, and lovely book?

mild spoilers, and initial review-y thoughts below?

I think a lot of my friends will be familiar with Becky Chambers’ stuff, but for context (since context is such a theme in this book) - they’re queer-positive, fairly soft sci fi, focusing on the relationships (shipmates, romantic, rivalries, friendships) between individuals in the world, rather than colossal Events of Galactic Significance (esp. compared to stuff like Ann Leckie, who I also like a lot). they’re also focused on humans (and their creations, <3 Lovelace in Book 2) as a kind of marginal and hardscrabble recently discovered species that’s not up to much, rather than casting us as the kind of ‘Humanity F- Yeah!‘/humans are special/have a unique manifest destiny that a fair amount of other sci fi does (a lot of people compare Chambers with the Mass Effect universe, which I genuinely don’t like because of this).

RoSF is very much in the tradition of this kind of small-scale ‘cosy’ sci-fi, dealing with the Exodan Fleet and its inhabitants who fled an environmentally devastated Earth, and who are under the three strains of the loss of one of their Generation Ships to metal fatigue, the visit of a well-meaning but intrusive alien anthropologist (whose broadcasts back home to her wealthy alien planet are really well-captured), and the issue of emigration/immigration/decline (?) of the Fleet. It follows a variety of plot lines - a fleet archivist, a recent immigrant, a restless teen guy, a caretaker (a kind of priest/funerary worker, really interesting), and a harried mum who’s considering leaving the fleet. It really inhabits their everyday lives and concerns; it indirectly tells a bigger story about uncertain cultural identity, but is focused on these small intimate stories.

The big through-line in the book is a sense of community, shared history, and what we owe to the past. The ships of the Exodan Fleet are maintained and patched together from their own scraps; people carry on identities, meanings and (as is discussed in one rather haunting bit towards the end) even bodies and ways of living as relics from a planet they will never set foot on; and (a really key theme) the nutrients of the bodies of the dead are recycled in a really emotive and heartfelt funereal ritual. How different people struggle with the past - rejecting it, chafing against it, seeking it out to fill holes in themselves, finding meaning in it, preserving it, making it - is so key throughout the book, both in the fiction, in the language, and the structure (bookended by two naming ceremonies, using a form of words that is so beautiful I feel I have to put it in a reblog), and it puts together a beautiful picture of a changing society where people are trying to preserve the values they built it on. The notion of recognising the fleet/the fleet you grew up in - is really powerful, and honestly a bit heart-in-throat.

But the notion of keeping shared history for its own sake isn’t enough - what’s worth preserving? Politically, it’s v. interesting too - there’s quite a lot of (well-blended-in) exposition and description of how the Fleet operates, and it’s ... well, if not Post Scarcity Fully Automated Luxury Gay Pacifist Space Communism, then at least Low Scarcity Labour-Egalitarian Lib Fem Space Anarcho-Socialism. The way that humans live and coexist alongside each other - where people come together, and where the faultlines between them are - is really well-illustrated without becoming didactic, and the idea of the fleet as this utopian, half-realised, desperate-but-now-slightly adrift project is really beautiful and well-evoked. The book is hopeful and convincing about the liberatory potential of this project (there’s a beautiful bit towards the end about even people leaving the fleet still being part of it and embodying what it values and means, but is ultimately clear-eyed about the fact that it’s the marginalised, minority part of a species that is nothing special on the galactic field and is surrounded by wealthy and powerful neighbours. It’s clear about the lingering crud of human social structures, about being undercut by intense, tragic disaster, by unequal external trade and internal corruption, and about the dubious appeals of the austere space-borne (and spaceborn) life compared to what the capitalist world beyond offers - but it’s hopeful nonetheless that people can make something of it, and that the fleet can carry on.

In terms of ~queer content~, it’s not quite as rich a vein as some of the previous books (first one had a lot more queer aliens and relationship structures, second had an incredibly strong trans metaphor as a through-line with an AI working out embodiment), but it’s got a lot of stuff that works with this too? Isabel, one of the main characters, is in a beautifully described and lovely wlw relationship, and her date with her wife where they’re remembering how they met is one of the most lovely bits of the book? Sometimes it’s OK not to have difficult queer feelings be an important part of the book. Sometimes just happy elderly lesbians is all you want/need! There’s also some interesting stuff with Sunny - a sex worker - and his relationship with Eyas, a funerary worker/caretaker - about the concept of ‘caring for bodies’, and the emotional labour that goes into that?

In terms of writing, it’s beautiful and lovely, just as much a warm hug and cup of hot chocolate as any of the other books in the series - it’s not super-lyrical or evocative in its use of language, but that’s not the point - it’s heartfelt and evokes real, flawed-but-good people in messy but fixable situations. The narration by Patricia Rodriguez on the audiobook version that I listened to is fantastic - I particularly like the way that she subtly changes language and accent on the different viewpoint characters to evoke the way different cultural perspectives and denaturalising the protagonists’ narrative voice.

So yes - it’s a small, beautiful, character-focused book with an extremely evocative sense of community and history. I cried a few times listening to it.

I’d definitely recommend it - probably on its own, but ideally in the context of the other two books before it, to flesh and round out the world(s) it evokes.

[too-spicy-and-too-queer]

Hi! I really appreciate your posts and found I connected with what you said about being aromantic and wanting committed emotional and sexual intimacy (though I'm still working out my feelings on the sexual bit). I was wondering if you could perhaps talk about your thoughts on being aromantic and polyamorous?

Thank you so much.  I’m still really shocked that people relate to what I’m writing, even though rationally that’s the reason why I started this blog.  It means a lot to me that people connect with my experiences.

Honestly, the overlap of my aromantic and polyamorous experiences is a complicated topic that I’m still struggling to understand.  So, good job picking perhaps the most difficult and confusing intersection of my blog topics for my first ever ask.  But the more I examine my experiences in these two areas, the more I realize they are deeply interconnected.

Before I continue, I want to say that there’s some debate over whether polyamory is an orientation or not.  Some polyamorists call it a relational orientation.  Having been involved in a local polyamory community for a decade now and having listened to many personal stories, I believe it is true that some people (maybe most?) do experience it that way.  I fully support them in their assertion that polyamory is an identity they did not choose, but an identity they need to acknowledge and be free to explore in order to be fully actualized people.  That said, this is not how I experience polyamory.  For me, engaging in polyamorous relationships is a rational choice, not something inherent to my being like my queer orientations.  Maybe it’s because I’m aromantic, so there’s a larger element of rational choice in my decisions to engage in romantic relationships in the first place.  But engaging in polyamorous relationships is a choice that has improved my quality of life repeatedly.  I’m not here to debate anyone else’s experience.  Others experience polyamory as an orientation and I stand by them in solidarity.  Normally I wouldn’t even bother saying this since we should all bear witness by default to each other’s personal experiences, but my experience of polyamory as a personal choice is relevant to what I’m going to share.

For me, initially, polyamory was just the most convenient solution to a set of problems that kept popping up in my romantic relationships.  But once I connected with a polyamory community, I stayed invested in it because of the way the community challenged my views and kept me thinking about the nuances of identity and intimacy.

The most striking thing to me in my earliest open relationships was how much freer I felt, and I don’t mean free to date around.  That was never what I wanted.  Romantic relationships are profoundly uncomfortable for me because of the expectations most heterosexual alloromantics havefor particular behavior and specific experiences, both in terms of romantic-coded activities that trigger my repulsion, and heteronormative behavior that makes me feel dysphoric.  But also, romantic relationships were the only tolerable situation I could think of in which I could explore the kinds of intimacy that I want when I love someone.

My first two open relationships started as monogamous relationships, so I had simply accepted that I would have to endure a certain amount of discomfort and repulsion.  Changing those relationships to nonmonogamous helped me feel some relief from that pressure, and helped my partners feel free to seek satisfaction elsewhere that I was not capable of giving them.  They were able to focus more on what they liked about intimacy with me, so the time we did spend together felt much more satisfying to both of us.  I also felt relief from the guilt of being in monogamous relationships and not being able to reciprocate my partner’s romantic feelings.  But I didn’t understand this with any kind of nuance, since the aromantic community didn’t exist yet, and I was still in deep denial about my queer identity. All I knew was that, even though I never pursued more than one intimate relationship at a time, open relationships felt better and I didn’t really know why.

My first two open relationships had already ended before I even heard the word “polyamory”.  After this, I decided to seek out other people who had similar experiences.  I found a local polyamory community and I was immediately drawn in by their discussion groups, how much they focused on open and honest communication, how many of them had practiced self-awareness skills, how they could communicate about emotions and intimacy with a nuance many monogamous people never learn.  I didn’t date again for years, but I kept going to events held by the polyamory community, participating in the discussion groups, and making friends.

Eventually, I did date again, and it was a similar experience.  I had hoped that if I was getting into relationships that were open from the beginning, there would be even less pressure on me to perform a particular way, but polyamorists do focus a lot on the romantic aspect of intimacy.  There were still a lot of heteronormative gender role expectations, so I was much more uncomfortable than I would have cared to be.  So my polyamorous relationships were short-lived, but by this point I had become an organizer in the polyamory community and still found a lot of satisfaction and meaning in our conversations about intimacy.

It was around this time that I began coming out as queer, and honestly that threw me into a crisis regarding polyamory.  Once I began exploring my identity and deeply examining my intimate experiences, I noticed that my experiences of attraction didn’t match the descriptions of the people around me.  I was facilitating a polyamory discussion group one day, listening to people describe in detail the arc of infatuation, and I realized I had never once experienced that.  This experience is directly what led to me looking up “aromantic” to see if it was a real thing.  And then I found the Tumblr aromantic blogosphere and Arocalypse, and it all made sense.  But I started to wonder if I should leave the polyamory community.  Discovering that I’m aro made me feel like a fake polyamorist, if that makes any sense.

But I still think polyamory can work for aros.  After all, one of the most common sayings I hear from polyamorists is “you have more than one friend, so why only one partner?”  I think this can resonate for aros more than they realize.  Honestly I think an open relationship is the only way I could be intimate with an alloromantic at this point, otherwise the pressure to satisfy their romantic needs would just be stifling to me.  And a lot of sexually active aromantics I’ve talked to so far seem to think that monogamy just isn’t particularly practical.  So while polyamory specifically might not be the best choice for every aro, I think nonmonogamy in general is probably a good option.  But there are still monogamous aros, and I have great respect for them.  We’ve all got to figure out our own comfort zones, and sometimes being a marginal queer makes that hard to explore, since we lack any collective narratives at all.  But that just means we need to write our own narratives.

[bravestage-blog]

The Dangers of Binary Identity Structures in the LGBTQ+ Community

Note: At the end of the post, I have included a glossary of terms which explain some of the identities that I reference.

The LGBTQ+ community is a complex group of individuals with a variety of different identities, experiences, and opinions. While mainstream media and individuals outside of the community often like to talk about queer experience as a monolithic entity, this practice fails to acknowledge both the diversity and hierarchical systems which exist specifically within this community. Intersectionality is a crucial thing to consider when examining the experiences of people, whether they are members of the LGBTQ+ community or not. The overlap of race, class, ability status, sexuality, and more all tie in to how we, as human beings, experience life. While our societal issues of racism, sexism, transphobia, xenophobia, and more are commonly associated with conservative values, they are by no means absent from the LGBTQ+ community. While these are complex, multi-faceted issues, they are crucial to understand because they develop structures of power and oppression within our world. Different societies have different norms and acceptable behaviors put forth by groups in power. Today, I would like to discuss a norm which permeates the general perspective of identity: the binary.

The insistence on binary systems, both generally in our country and more specifically within the queer community, is both problematic and diminishing to individuals with more fluid identities. This post will delve into binary structures and attitudes within the LGBTQ+ community which impact the experience of bisexual, pansexual, and queer sexualities, as well as trans//non-binary gender identities. My argument ultimately discourages binary-only thinking. It examines the dangers of binary norms which further marginalize and alienate people who exist along a spectrum, rather than at the ends of it. Such issues remain prevalent even within a community that is supposed to protect and validate queer identity. I believe that commitment to binary systems and rejection of fluid identity ultimately hinders our ability to grow, open our minds, and understand one another. It is counterproductive and illogical to put people into boxes, especially within the already marginalized LGBTQ+ community.

When I speak of the hierarchies which exist within the queer community, I refer primarily to the influence possessed by white, cisgender* gays and lesbians. There are plenty of queer individuals who exist within a binary themselves, and that is their truth. But that reality does not apply to other LGBTQ+ individuals, and should not be forced upon them. The experiences of bisexuals within the queer community is perhaps the most frequently discussed example. Their experience can best be summarized from Youtube channel “Bisexual Real Talk.” Alex Anders makes the important point that “Every time we tell young people who are bisexual to go and search the LGBT community, we are creating certain expectations in their mind. And what do you think does more damage: when a person who knows they are going to be discriminated in a certain group and then gets discriminated in that group, or when a person is told that they will be able to find solace in a group and they lower their guard and then they’re discriminated against?” This statement perfectly frames an ongoing issue within the queer community.

A variety of studies have been conducted surrounding biphobia in LGBTQ+ spaces. As a bit of explanation: “biphobia seeks to undermine the legitimacy of bisexual identities and comes in many forms: jokes, stereotypes, non-inclusive language and even abuse. The fear of being dismissed as “too gay” or “too straight” often makes it hard to be open” (HRC). In a study conducted by Corey E. Flanders at the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health in Toronto, “Many of the participants reported not only encountering professionals who were clueless about bisexuality, but also feeling unwanted at Pride events just for being bisexual. The results indicated “young bisexual women perceive monosexism and biphobia as significant challenges to their mental health at the institutional, community, interpersonal and intrapersonal level” (Flanders). Additionally, a study by Tangela S. Roberts and Sharon G. Horne of the University of Massachusetts, and William T. Hoyt of the University of Wisconsin surveyed 745 bisexuals of various ages, genders, and ethnicities to share their stories of experiencing biphobia. The study found that “although the bisexuals surveyed experienced more biphobia from straight people, they also experienced an alarming amount of biphobia from lesbians and gays” (Roberts). A common argument that people, queer and otherwise, like to make about bisexual individuals is that they are confused. There is an idea surrounding bisexuality that women just experimenting or men are gay but afraid to fully commit. While this mentality is shifting, it is still undeniably present among queer and straight people alike. Hurtful terminology within the LGBTQ+ community has even developed surrounding the bisexual identity. Pride.com created a list of terms/phrases used by gays and lesbians against bisexuals. Examples include “Hasbian,” and “bi now, gay later.” Terms like this suggest that bisexuality is a transitional phase which people use to ease themselves into the queer community before assuming a “real” identity, which falls within the binary of either gay or straight. So, why does this matter so much? According to the Bisexual Resource Center, approximately 40 percent of bisexual people have considered or attempted suicide, compared to just over a quarter of gay men and lesbians. Additionally, according to The Williams Institute, “bisexual-identified people make up approximately half of the total population of the LGBTQ community — but only 28 percent of bisexual people report being out to those closest to them.” This represents a clear, pressing issue on the dangers of binary identity structures and biphobia.Biphobia is closely related to “monosexism,” which is “a belief that monosexuality (either exclusive heterosexuality and/or homosexuality) is superior to or more legitimate than a bisexual or other non-monosexual orientation” (Everyday Feminism). Monosexism also invalidates pansexual* and other queer sexualities that are not as binary as gay or straight. While binary sexuality research has primarily focused on bisexuals, there is also the experience of transgender* and non-binary* individuals to consider.

Discussions of transgender identity have been a more prominent topic of conversation in the United States over the last couple of years. The ongoing debate argues whether or not there are more than two genders. Many people, within and outside of the LGBTQ+ community, believe that the body that we are born into dictates our gender and how we are supposed to act/present ourselves. This is again representative of binary identity modeling. Transgender and non-binary identities exist contrary to this mindset. Transphobia is a huge problem in the LGBTQ+ community, despite the T representing transgender people. Pride, a well-known celebration for the queer community, is meant to commemorate the transgender-led Stonewall Riots back in the 1960s. However, transgender people are often forgotten in these celebrations today. Trans and non-binary individuals do not receive nearly as much support or recognition within the LGBTQ+ community. As a result, such individuals are struggling at alarming rates. According to the New York Times, a recent survey of more than six thousand self-identified transgender people showed that 41 percent have attempted suicide, a staggering twenty-six times the rate of the general population. There is conversation within the queer community that trans and non-binary people are “hurting the movement.” These people fail to acknowledge the work done by courageous trans women like Sylvia Rivera and Marsha P. Johnson, work that has greatly benefited the LGBTQ+ community as a whole.

The common understanding of gender as a binary system is not one that includes all people. It is also one that leads to deeply rooted problems for queer and straight individuals alike. Strict adherence to a gender binary and, subsequently, gender roles, can perpetuate issues of misogyny, hypermasculinity, domestic violence, homophobia, transphobia, and more.Identifying within the binary is not the problem. The problem is believing solely in the binary. It is the belief that things must only be one way or the other which complicates and oppresses individuals in many ways. Existing in the binary model may work for many of us, but forcing it onto other people is neither fair nor beneficial. Humans are not meant to be diminished into narrow categories with little room for expansion or exploration. We should not be limited by binaries, especially surrounding gender or sexuality.

If the LGBTQ+ community really wants to advocate for acceptance, equality, and human rights, then it needs to extend it’s fight to all of the individuals who exist within the community. This means acknowledging non-binary sexualities and gender identities, acknowledging race, and, ultimately, acknowledging the intersectional nature of human existence. Empathy and openmindedness are crucial to the fight which the queer community continues to advocate for. Feeling a sense of community with those who are similar to you is crucial for support, happiness, and general wellbeing. For this reason, my “Spread the Word” project will delve further into the queer community and how a hierarchy exists even within this marginalized group. Ultimately, I hope that people who get to view parts of this project can identify with or learn something new from the experiences I highlight and examine. To fellow LGBTQ+ individuals: if we cannot look out for each other, how can we expect people outside our community to look out for us? We must fix the problems within our own spaces and find unity if we truly hope for change in our world. Erasing the binary-only mentality is a great way to begin such reforms.

Vocabulary:

Cisgender: identifying with the anatomical sex that you were assigned at birth (a physical male identifying as a man, a physical female identifying as a woman)

Transgender: identifying with a gender that does not align with your anatomical sex at birth (someone who is assigned male at birth who identifies as a woman, someone who is assigned female at birth who identifies as a man)

Genderqueer or non-binary: people who do not subscribe to conventional gender distinctions but identify with neither, both, or a combination of masculinity and femininity

Bisexual: sexual attraction towards two or more genders (attracted most commonly to cisgender men and cisgender women)

Pansexual: sexual attraction towards people regardless of their sex or gender identity

Queer: a reclaimed term used by LGBTQ+ individuals to describe themselves (in terms of sexuality and/or gender identity)

[alarriefantasy]

I’ve been updating my blog, and some of my fic rec lists, so I figured it’s time I update/do a proper - Enemies to Lovers Fic Rec. I hope you all enjoy this! 

ABO

The Tale of Two Kingdoms by larriebane Words: 24k Tumblr: @larriebane 

ABO-universe with modern language mixed with some new and old traditions, no technology exist (cars, phones, electricity etc.)

Prince Louis of Doncaster finds himself in the wrong place at the wrong time as the feared Hijackers from Cheshire come to claim their annual pray of omegas. He is taken away and transported to a strange country that Louis has been taught as the enemies’ land. When unforeseen events take place and even more unlikely savior turns up, Louis’ all previous beliefs are being proved wrong. Will love save the two kingdoms and form an alliance after several centuries of feuds between these bordering countries?

where the lights are beautiful by twoshipsdrifting Words: 31k

Harry wasn’t wrong about that, not in a general sense. Lots of omegas did seek out rich alphas and betas, hoping or planning to go into heat at the right time. Plenty of omegas saw this as their duty, especially if their families weren’t well off. Worse, Louis couldn’t honestly say he’d never thought about it. If that had been his life, his goal, Louis would feel pretty good about himself now. As it is…Louis feels like shit.

.:. .:. .:.

Or the accidental bonding a/b/o fic.

Like Candy In My Veins by littlelouishiccups Words: 31k Tumblr: @littlelouishiccups

“Um…” Harry said slowly after a moment. “Okay. That’s… this is… Let me get this straight.” He lifted up a hand and swallowed. “You told your family that you have a boyfriend… and my name was the first one you thought of?”

“Harry Potter was on TV, alright? It wasn’t that much of a stretch.” Louis pinched the bridge of his nose. He couldn’t believe he was explaining himself to Harry fucking Styles. He couldn’t believe he was stooping this low. “Forget it. I’m sorry I even thought about bringing you into this.”

Harry snorted. “What? Did you want me to pretend to be your boyfriend or something?” (Basically the A/B/O, enemies to lovers, fake relationship, Christmas AU that nobody asked for.)

I'm On the Hunt Now (I'm After You) by AFangirlFantasy Words: 56k Tumblr: @afangirlfantasy

Omegas haven’t been able to shift into their wolves for two hundred years. That is, until Louis Tomlinson changes everything.

Or...an AU where Alpha Harry and Omega Louis have a lot more than falling in love to deal with after The Mating Ceremony.

pray for some sweet simplicity by delsicle Words: 237 Tumblr: @emperorstyles

Louis is the only omega to ever make it in the cut-throat world of competitive motorcycle racing—that is, he would be if anyone actually knew about his identity. Now, his sights are set towards competing in—and winning—the European Grand Prix, the biggest and most difficult race of the entire year, so he can disappear underground for good. He’s close enough, too, until an alpha sports journalist is assigned to follow Louis’s every move as he prepares for the event of his career.

Or, an AU where motorcycle racing is the biggest sport in a heavily divided world, Louis is trying to take control of his own destiny, and Harry is in for more than he bargained for.

Religion

Baby Heaven's in your Eyes by theboyfriendstagram Words: 120k Tumblr: @theboyfriendstagram

Or a sixth form!AU where Harry is the fucked up bad boy with too many problems, Louis is the perfect rich boy with too much money and their schools are right across from each other. They meet at a party and that’s the last (and maybe the only) thing they need.

Turning From Praise (Punk!Harry Christian!Louis) by capriciouslouis Words: 128k Tumblr: @capriciouslouis   

Louis has had a strict Christian upbringing that he never realized he resented until he meets Harry Styles, a boy who lives to rebel and doesn’t give a damn what anyone else thinks. But the better he gets to know Harry, the more he begins to realize that maybe Harry does care. And maybe “the children who God forgot” are closer to God than the devout will ever be.

Shake Me Down by AGreatPerhaps12 Words: 208k

Tumblr: @agreatperhaps12

Harry's new to college, fresh out of Catholic school and conversion therapy camp, and Louis runs the campus LGBTQIA organization.

Royal/Pirate

Sail into the Sun by orphan_account Words: 31k

Prince Louis Tomlinson is sick of the closet. Harry Styles is a con man with a hatred of rich people. Louis needed a way out, Harry needed a husband. It was a mutual agreement. Doesn't mean they have to like each other.

All The King's Men by sacredheart (orphan_account) Words: 39k

Louis is an arrogant, self assured prince who falls in love with a charming thief named Harry during his youth. However, years later, a revolution is sparked amongst the frustrated commoners... and Louis's former teenage romance is leading it.

Liberté by larriebane Words: 64k Tumblr: @larriebane

AU. 1647. “Pretending you don’t have a heart is not the best way to not get it broken. It’s just the easiest.”

Or the pirate AU I always wanted to write

Wear It Like A Crown by zarah5 Words: 141k Tumblr: @zarah5

AU. As part of a team of fixers hired to handle a gay scandal in Buckingham Palace, Louis expects Prince Harry to be a lot of things—most notably a royally spoilt brat. Never mind that the very same Prince Harry used to star in quite a number of Louis' teenage fantasies.

School

A Month With the Tomlinson Clan by Larry_Klaine_Stylinson Words: 14k

Harry and Louis have always hated each other, but when Harry's mum and sister have to go out of the country, Harry needs a place to stay, and Anne decides to ask her friend Jay if he can stay at her place.

18 by aclosetlarryshipper  Words: 15k Tumblr: @thedarkestlarrie

Harry hates Golden Boy Louis and he's pretty sure the feeling's mutual. It's too bad they're forced into parenthood together during the home ec baby project.

Featuring accidental fathers, an improv performance gone wrong, and an altruistic game of spin the bottle.

And I'll judge the cover by the book by harrystylesandstuff Words: 73k

At twenty years old Harry has his life figured out. He’ll graduate from the private University of Buckingham and move to Oxford to study journalism. He’ll meet someone who shares his values and accepts who he is, and apply everything his successful parents have taught him.

At twenty-two years old Louis has no clue what he wants in life. He’s not sure he’ll pass the year and doesn’t know where he’ll go after that. He spends his time smoking away his doubts about himself with his friends and all he cares about is making sure his family doesn’t fall apart.

They don’t belong together.

Or a Private University AU where Harry is a queer posh prince, Louis is a closeted troublemaker, and neither expect to understand each other the way they will.

Soft Hands, Fast Feet, Can't Lose by dolce_piccante  Words: 112k Tumblr: @haydolce

American Uni AU. Harry Styles is a frat boy football star from the wealthy Styles Family athletic dynasty. A celebrity among football fans, he knows how to play, he knows how to party, and he knows how to fuck (all of which is well known among his legion of admirers).

Louis Tomlinson is a student and an athlete, but his similarities to Harry end there. Intelligent, focused, independent, and completely uninterested in Harry’s charms, Louis is an anomaly in a world ruled by football.

A bet about the pair, who might be more similar than they originally thought, brings them together. Shakespeare, ballet, Disney, football, library chats, running, accidental spooning, Daredevil and Domino’s Pizza all blend into one big friendship Frappucino, but who will win in the end?

Unbelievers by isthatyoularry Words: 136k Tumblr: @isthatyoularry

It’s Louis’ senior year, and he’s dead set on doing it right. However, along with his pair of cleats, a healthy dose of sarcasm and his ridiculous best friend, he’s also got a complicated family, a terrifyingly uncertain future, and a mortal enemy making his life just that much worse. Mortal enemies “with benefits” was not exactly the plan.

Or: The one where Louis and Harry definitely aren’t friends, and football is everything.

Supernatural

once upon a dream by thedeathchamber Words: 33k Tumblr: @louehvolution

Louis is psychic and gets caught in the middle of a murder investigation led by FBI Special Agent Harry Styles.

aka. the Medium/Criminal Minds-inspired AU no one ever asked for.

Even Angels Have Their Demons by AFangirlFantasy Words: 52k Tumblr: @afangirlfantasy

Louis is appointed the role of Guardian Angel, and his first mission is a boy named Zayn Malik. Unfortunately, it seems that a certain Demon has gotten to him first.

Or... an Angel/Demon AU where Angel Louis hates Demon Harry, but somewhere along the way that stops being so true.

Luscious blood by Deidei Words: 116k

Louis Tomlinson, a human, has been living in poor living conditions together with his mother since he was born. Ever since he can remember he has loathed the stronger, faster, more developed kind that rule this world; Vampires. But will his opinion change after he meets his soul mate that is an arrogant, royal vampire named Harry Styles…

Run Like the Devil by benzos Words: 138k Tumblr: @churchrat

Harry stops pouting, but his frown is still fixed in place. “Are you sure?” he asks. “You know it’s your soul you’re signing away.” He sounds…sad? No, that’s not right, but there’s something.

Christ. This is the most incompetent demon Louis’ ever met. If he hadn’t seen the red of his eyes he wouldn’t believe he was a demon at all. How’d he get this job if he isn’t trying to convince Louis to deal? Or is it just another trick? A ploy for sympathy?

“I’m sure,” Louis says. “Come over here and kiss me.”

*Supernatural AU. Louis hunts demons; Harry's the strangest demon he's ever met, and he keeps fucking meeting him.

Other

Three French Hems by 100percentsassy, gloria_andrews Words: 19k Tumblrs: @100percentsassy, @gloriaandrews

In which Louis is a designer at Burberry and Harry spends December wearing Lanvin… and Lanvin… and Lanvin.

After Hours by Velvetoscar  Words: 26k Tumblr: @mizzwilde

Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson are the bane of each other's existences. Unfortunately, they're already in love--even if they aren't completely aware of this minor detail.

[A "You've Got Mail" AU]

Love's Truest Language by summerwine Words: 48k Tumblr: @smrwine

The first part was meant as a joke. He didn't really expect Harry to buy anything. It was just Louis’ way of softening the ‘get the fuck out’ blow.

“Where's your order forms, then?”

“I don't want your flowers.” Louis chided before directing all of his attention to the arrangement in front of him.

Harry laughed under his breath as he stood to his full height, “Who said anything about them being for you, love?”

Taken Over By The Feeling by whyidontknow1 Words: 53k

After almost a year of increasingly troubling behavior, Louis agrees to let his sister live with him. It's a last resort before more drastic measures are taken by their mom.

Harry Styles runs Given A Chance, a program for troubled and disadvantaged teens out of the bakery he owns. He offers the kids in his program what he believes they need to start on a different and better path for their lives.

Louis learns all too quickly that Harry's goodwill does not extend to him. Only because he happens to remind Harry of an ex he'd rather forget. It's not the smoothest of beginnings, but in the end Louis' own issues might be the real problem.

somethin' bout you by missandrogyny Words: 59k Tumblr: @missandrogyny

Of all the government agents in the world, Louis had to go and land the most charming one.

You Drive Me Round The Bend by TheCellarDoor Words: 77k Tumblr: @donotdialnine

In which Louis is a spoilt rich kid who’s always on the phone while he drives and Harry is a struggling musician making his way down the mountain. It’s just a matter of time before they crash and burn.

Hate Me To The Moon by harrystylesandstuff Words: 83k

The last thing Harry wanted was to spend his entire summer stuck with his dad's new fiancée and her kids. He wants no more when he learns she's a very religious dictator, raising a sixteen year old nun and a clean cut potential priest ass kisser.

Everything takes a slightly different turn, however, when Harry finds out his future step-brother is actually the rude stranger he caught sucking off a guy in a pub, far from the reserved Christian his mom thinks he is...

AU where Harry is a sexy nerd, Louis is a great actor, and they both pretend to hate each other's guts to convince themselves they're not feeling things future step-brothers shouldn't feel...

Off The Record by Tomlinsontoes Words: 90k Tumblr: @pianolouis 

Louis is an out of control teen heartthrob, Harry is hired to get him back on track and they both hate each other while they secretly don't.

“I'm not your personal assistant you know,” Harry says once he gets there and Louis lets him in and he shoves the bag into his hands. “I'm your publicist.”

“I know that,” Louis smiles a devilish grin patting Harry in the middle of his chest as he takes the bag, “but look at you personally assisting me,” he says looking in the bag and pulling out the Cheetos. I also know that my PA turns his phone on silent at night, and clearly, you don't. Waiting for a booty call or something?” Louis says turning on his heels and scurrying over to his sofa and plopping down. Harry swears he sees a puff of orange dust soar into the air when Louis opens the bag. He's amazed that couch is as clean as it looks.

Dance to the Distortion by Lis (domesticharry) Words: 96k Tumblr: @domestic-harry

Louis accidentally breaks Harry's camera lens and in order to get it fixed, they decide to participate in a romantic couples study. The only issue is that they are not actually couple. Well that and the fact they cannot stand each other.

more than just a dream by spit_on_me_larry Words: 122k

Louis Tomlinson loves his life, he really does. It's just that he's constantly on the verge of everything completely going to shit. He's disorganized and clumsy and hotheaded and just a little bit ridiculous.

And then he meets Harry Styles. Harry is the type of person Louis hates. It seems like everything comes easily to him. He's rich and brilliant and everyone loves him and he has his life impossibly and perfectly together.

Louis detests Harry Styles. Except for the inconvenient fact that he can't seem to get Harry out of his head.

[anothershadeofpurple]

I know that SQ at this point is a dead thing with no hopes of happening now but at what point do we suddenly flock to this new lgbt character/relationship A&E are trying to sell us. I understand representation is important and scarce but to kiss a$$ to these two guys who treated our fandom like crap and have no regrets over the last 6 years "cause who remembers?" (a la Eddy) is upsetting to me. I feel like it's a betrayal to SQ to accept this. It gives them thought that we only wanted any f/f

Hey Anon!

Is this a general comment in response to things you read or is it because I tweeted Adam about how the announcement of the inclusion of an LGBTQ character had the opposite effect of normalizing? 

I can - obviously - see why people think it’s not going to happen, but I am still pretty sure that it will if they get to tell their story, which influences the way I communicate about it. It all makes sense if you look at their world building as Emma’s mental space - the how might be unpredictable, but it’s pretty clear they set up Regina and Henry to be Emma’s fairy tale happy ending and her story isn’t actually over yet.

The first openly queer characters were Ruby & Dorothy. Ruby is the wolf and the wolf guides the way as I talked about here. So if you look at Emma’s mind as that of a repressed lesbian - the product of religion and unaccepting society - then suddenly the queer subtext being everywhere just below the surface makes a lot of sense. Ruby symbolized a desire that would no longer be repressed - the first breakthrough if you will.

“The Ruby Slippers are a deep dream symbol, representing both Dorothy’s means of getting around in Oz and her identity, her unassailable integrity. The shoes are a reassuring Mentor’s gift, the knowledge that you are a unique being with a core that cannot be shaken by outside events. They are like Ariadne’s Thread in the story of Theseus and the Minotaur, a connection with a positive, loving anima that gets you through the darkest of labyrinths.”From: The Writer’s Journey - Christopher Vogler

That brings me to the spoilers of a new LGBTQ character - my money is on Alice. I’ve written about this new book telling the story from the perspective of consciousness - check here, here and here. From the spoilers it’s my guess many of these new characters will be playing out aspects of Emma’s life before we met her. Many females of different ages are added and we’re going to an urban setting in our world. She’s remembering who she is. Whatever this character’s storyline is, it’s the next step in Emma’s process of breaking through repression and being honest about who she loves. It will still be fantastical, it’s still a fairy tale setting, but my guess is it will give us more clues about Emma’s past that are a little closer to how things actually happened than the hints we’ve gotten so far.

Now I want to talk about what you’re saying, about people selling out. The fandom has done every conceivable thing to get the showrunners’ and the media’s attention over the years. There’s been anger and attempts at diplomatic conversation. There have been twitter trends and media articles. Nothing really came of it. If anyone involved doesn’t know the importance of Emma, Regina & Henry versus any other LGBTQ couple by now, then they’re never going to know because they do not want to know. Not to mention they know what they have written and produced. They know exactly what they have been doing, what they have been suggesting with these characters.

Now I see a mentality of placing blame on each other for how fandom has been treated or how the storyline has evolved. “If only we had done this differently we would have had different results. We would have gotten what we wanted.” It’s a defense mechanism in order to not feel powerless. Look for somebody closer to you. Somebody who you can blame so you don’t feel out of control. So you feel you can get some form of justice by punishing someone. The reality is that the blame lies with:

An inherently homophobic society

A conservative media culture

Heterosexual writers writing queer characters based on research but not from life experience

Old school PR principles

…

If you accept blame lies with a marginalized group or individuals within it and how they react to their unfair treatment - even if people are doing the opposite of what you think is productive - you are losing sight of the real issues and the real causes. The truth is that you are angry with other people who are reacting to an unfair situation they are also a victim of. We have to recognize that in some ways we simply are powerless before we can figure out what power we do have. 

What to do?

Anger is fuel, it’s energy. Treasure it, but try to direct it. Within the disadvantaged group, find the people who feel the same about this issue as you do. Maybe it’s only one person, maybe it’s five people, maybe you can find a bigger group. Vent with them. Talk out the frustrations with them to take the edge off. Publicly talk about what frustrates you and why, but avoid being passive aggressive and placing blame. Backgrounds of people online and what they seek here are incredibly diverse. Ages, levels of education, how far they are in the self-acceptance and coming out process, financial backgrounds, ethnicities, temperaments, levels of involvement, … Always be aware you are lacking a lot of information about the people you are interacting with - some of which you would have in real life. People are more receptive when they’re not under attack and many here feel vulnerable - whether they seem like they do or not. You may be right about something, but that doesn’t mean you’ll be understood. Pick your battles, focus on being understood first. 

Now with your group of people - or even if it’s just you - decide what you can do with what you have. Get informed. Read books on activism. Find the right words. Decide what the right course of action is for you. Identify the power structures you are fighting. Think big. Think about the next time around, think about changing things for future generations. Consider supporting the opposite of what you are fighting. There are a million ways to make a change. Find something that works with your personality, your means, your level of comfort, your talents. Find something that is safe for you to do depending on your situation - and if you are risking your safety, make it a conscious choice, something that comes from within and not from outside pressures.

I’m under the impression that in emancipatory struggles of minorities there are always roughly two groups. Generally, there will be a group labeled as “radical”. I would say that these people are actually more right about how things should be. They will rally, point out the flaws in the system. They are often considered aggressive, but they’re obviously not, they’re just very aware of the unfairness and point out the differences between them and the privileged group.

The other group is a group who is more focused on building bridges and being diplomatic. They try not to rock the boat and aim for smaller changes. What you bring up - “selling out” - is often a complaint heard from the more radical group when talking about the moderate group, while the moderate group is worried about the boat rocking too hard and there being repercussions and setbacks to the progress if we push too hard and too fast.

In reality it’s often those two groups taking opposite action - but doing in the same moment in time - that creates change. We need people to loudly call attention to issues, we need people to gently explain the issues when people are called to attention. Some people need to be kicked into action, others need a gentle hand guiding them. The power comes from these different approaches. While we need to keep each other in check - especially when it comes to intersectionality, because yes, in those cases diplomacy often crosses over into selling out - seeing things this way helps me personally recenter. Take a step back, look at the bigger picture and never forget who and what you are actually fighting. Make sure that’s where you direct your energy. Be communicative within your own group, but don’t get completely side-tracked interacting with people who do things differently but who ultimately share your cause. 

Odds are someone needs to hear what they have to say in the way they say it. Odds are somebody needs to hear what you have to say in the way you have to say it too. Just don’t lose sight of the real causes of your discomfort.

[johnboothus]

Gay Bar Meet Cocktail Bar

In a 2009 article for queer publication Between the Lines, writer Camper English laments the lack of “couture cocktails” at gay establishments, pointing to the stereotype that “we’re supposed to be trendy people.” Having covered cocktail culture since 2006, English believes drinks programs at gay bars have remained remarkably static as the bar and restaurant industry have drastically evolved.

Ten years later, he says that’s still the case. “It dawned on me that none of the gay bars were moving in the same direction as other bars — they were just doing the same old flavored vodka drinks, most without fresh juices or even drink menus,” English tells VinePair. “These days, there are some gay bars using fresh juices in their cocktails, at least, and more of the restaurants in gayborhoods are getting it right. But it seems generally that gay bar cocktails are about where nightclub cocktails are in terms of average quality.”

Of course, the high-volume drinks programs at some gay venues function primarily as social lubricants. They are designed to lower inhibitions, complementing the shirtless go-go dancers, pounding music, and condom dispensers. Why, though, can’t excellent cocktails and handy condoms coexist?

While the mixology movement has brought well-made Manhattans and Mojitos to hotel bars, cruise ship bars, piano bars, music festival bars, and, hell, even airplane bars, 20 years after the cocktail revolution launched in NYC, gay bars are one of the last places in America you can’t always find a good drink. With so many priorities to juggle, from shifting socioeconomics to vanishing venues, gay bars and cocktail culture are now at a historic crossroads.

“We think of cocktail bars as a place to go and have a curated experience,” says Alex Negranza, a gay bartender and director of operations at Tongue-Cut Sparrow and The Pastry War in Houston. “Historically, we don’t have that association in the gay bar scene because, for so long, gays were never afforded the luxury of a place to indulge. … They needed places to be safe, and be away from society.”

Much has changed, and continues to change, since bars like San Francisco’s Black Cat and New York’s Stonewall opened in underserved neighborhoods to provide refuge to gay communities in the 1950s. Namely, the steady closing of the “gay wage gap.” According to the latest studies from Prudential and the Harvard Business Review, the average queer American — albeit mostly cis white gay males — now earns as much if not more than their straight counterparts.

Then there’s the fact that today’s “gayborhoods,” like Chelsea in New York, Boystown in Chicago, or Montrose in Houston, are among their cities’ whitest and most affluent. Modern gay bars, likewise, no longer inhabit the same cultural and physical spaces as their predecessors. Widespread acceptance of LGBT culture in large cities, while offering safety and visibility for the community, has stripped these establishments of their edge. And, one could argue, their heart.

Some queer bartenders are hesitant to bring the craft cocktail movement, with its hand-cut ice and elevated price tags, into gay and lesbian bars because there are so few of them left. “The gay bar isn’t nearly as ubiquitous as we’d all like it to be, so switching the beverage program at even a couple of gay bars in the city makes access to queer spaces even more limited,” says Yi Chen, bartender at The Aviary NYC. “If gay bars are truly to remain about community, the message sent by cocktail-specific gay bars is one of alienation to those who can’t afford it, which implies a culture that I personally find problematic.”

Others believe queer establishments with quality cocktails would provide a welcome alternative to hard-partying gay nightlife. “I don’t really go to gay bars anymore,” Negranza says. “I just remember looking around and seeing people hooking up in the bathrooms or doing drugs on the dance floor. That’s totally fine and I think people should enjoy what they like, but it’s not for me. I like to have a nice cocktail or spirit.”

In recent years, a small handful of bars have aimed to strike a balance by serving good cocktails as well as their community. In 2016, Garrett McKechnie opened Mattachine Society, a gay cocktail bar in Los Angeles, but it sadly closed shortly thereafter. Fortunately, in early 2019, chef Angela Dimayuga, formerly of Mission Chinese Food, opened No Bar, a “new-wave gay bar” in New York City’s Standard East Village Hotel.

Dimayuga, who is lesbian and Filipina-American, says the higher-end bar suits the luxury hotel and its neighborhood, which is also home to some of the nation’s most acclaimed cocktail bars, like Death & Co. and PDT. While No Bar’s prices are competitive with those at surrounding establishments, inclusivity is important to Dimayuga. The bar is designed to serve the neighborhood’s ethnically diverse, queer-friendly crowd.

“When we introduced more affordable cocktails, we found our guests gravitated to the more high-end cocktails,” Dimayuga says. “The menu is very much a response to the neighborhood — high-end drinks and bar food in a space that is open and available to anyone. Our programming is created for the community it’s serving. There’s an extremely diverse set of people that feel at home at No Bar and we want to create nightly events that feel accessible to all.”

Events at No Bar also highlight the creative contributions of queer folks in New York, and include a monthly installment by Humberto Leon of Opening Ceremony.

When Shawn Vergara and his sister Tiffny Vergara Chung revamped their Brewcade bar in San Francisco’s historic gay neighborhood, The Castro, earlier this year, they wanted it to represent its location. Now called Detour, after a historic gay club, it serves elevated cocktails in an intergenerationally inclusive space.

“I’ve been drinking, partying, and working in the neighborhood for 15 to 20 years, but as I got older, I couldn’t find places where I could have a drink that was delicious, and that matched the place I was in my life,” Vergara says. “My palate had matured. And the mature crowd wants something a little more sophisticated. There was definitely something missing, and I wanted to show that gays can participate in cocktail culture, too.”

Caitlin Laman, founder of the cocktail conference Chicago Style, believes we could soon see many more gay-friendly or -focused cocktail bars like those McKechnie, Dimayuga, and Vergara have opened, but says those interested in courting the community need to do so thoughtfully. “The most important thing is that the people opening these bars be queer, and really care in order to create a space that’s opening and safe for the queer community — it’s going to take creative thinking on the business side and marketing side,” Laman says.

Beyond putting up rainbow stickers, some cocktail bars now do more to seek out the queer community when hiring — Facebook posts will make note of preference to qualified POC and LGBT applicants, for example. Others offer programming for LGBT patrons, such as Brooklyn’s Donna Cocktail Club, which hosts a queer happy hour every other Sunday, and Oakland’s Starline Social Club, which puts on a monthly queer dance party.

In July 2019, Christina Cabrera, 41, moderated a panel at Tales of the Cocktail called “Turning Allies Into Advocates.” It featured Negranza along with New York bar pioneer Julie Reiner and Whit Kathner of Washington, D.C.’s women-owned Republic Restoratives distillery.

“My seminar at Tales was the first of its kind. It took 15 years to have a queer-focused seminar,” Cabrera says. “I think the industry wants to be better, there are people out there who genuinely want to be more inclusive. I heard from straight people afterwards who said they were unaware of the struggle, and that they want to do things like be more conscious of pronouns.”

Cabrera, who serves as the New York ambassador for Grey Goose, says spirits brands have enormous potential to diversify the offerings in and impressions of queer cocktail bars. A lot of programming depends on what brands bars work with or have in stock. She points to brands like Stoli and Absolut, which have invested in the queer community for decades, along with some of Bacardi’s recent efforts during Word Pride NYC 2019.

“Our community is one to invest in — if all I can do is start the conversation, then I’ve done my part,” she says.

The success of establishments like No Bar and Detour shows that a delicate middle ground for gay cocktail bars can and should exist — as long as queer people are empowered to open them. “As a generation, we need to leave things better than how they were when we walked in,” says Cabrera. “Your dollars are your vote, so know what products you’re putting behind the bar. We appreciate you coming to the parade with us, but we need you to fight with us and fight for us.”

The article Gay Bar, Meet Cocktail Bar appeared first on VinePair.

Via https://vinepair.com/articles/gay-bar-meet-cocktail-bar/

source https://vinology1.weebly.com/blog/gay-bar-meet-cocktail-bar

[wineanddinosaur]

Gay Bar, Meet Cocktail Bar

In a 2009 article for queer publication Between the Lines, writer Camper English laments the lack of “couture cocktails” at gay establishments, pointing to the stereotype that “we’re supposed to be trendy people.” Having covered cocktail culture since 2006, English believes drinks programs at gay bars have remained remarkably static as the bar and restaurant industry have drastically evolved.

Ten years later, he says that’s still the case. “It dawned on me that none of the gay bars were moving in the same direction as other bars — they were just doing the same old flavored vodka drinks, most without fresh juices or even drink menus,” English tells VinePair. “These days, there are some gay bars using fresh juices in their cocktails, at least, and more of the restaurants in gayborhoods are getting it right. But it seems generally that gay bar cocktails are about where nightclub cocktails are in terms of average quality.”

Of course, the high-volume drinks programs at some gay venues function primarily as social lubricants. They are designed to lower inhibitions, complementing the shirtless go-go dancers, pounding music, and condom dispensers. Why, though, can’t excellent cocktails and handy condoms coexist?

While the mixology movement has brought well-made Manhattans and Mojitos to hotel bars, cruise ship bars, piano bars, music festival bars, and, hell, even airplane bars, 20 years after the cocktail revolution launched in NYC, gay bars are one of the last places in America you can’t always find a good drink. With so many priorities to juggle, from shifting socioeconomics to vanishing venues, gay bars and cocktail culture are now at a historic crossroads.

“We think of cocktail bars as a place to go and have a curated experience,” says Alex Negranza, a gay bartender and director of operations at Tongue-Cut Sparrow and The Pastry War in Houston. “Historically, we don’t have that association in the gay bar scene because, for so long, gays were never afforded the luxury of a place to indulge. … They needed places to be safe, and be away from society.”

Much has changed, and continues to change, since bars like San Francisco’s Black Cat and New York’s Stonewall opened in underserved neighborhoods to provide refuge to gay communities in the 1950s. Namely, the steady closing of the “gay wage gap.” According to the latest studies from Prudential and the Harvard Business Review, the average queer American — albeit mostly cis white gay males — now earns as much if not more than their straight counterparts.

Then there’s the fact that today’s “gayborhoods,” like Chelsea in New York, Boystown in Chicago, or Montrose in Houston, are among their cities’ whitest and most affluent. Modern gay bars, likewise, no longer inhabit the same cultural and physical spaces as their predecessors. Widespread acceptance of LGBT culture in large cities, while offering safety and visibility for the community, has stripped these establishments of their edge. And, one could argue, their heart.

Some queer bartenders are hesitant to bring the craft cocktail movement, with its hand-cut ice and elevated price tags, into gay and lesbian bars because there are so few of them left. “The gay bar isn’t nearly as ubiquitous as we’d all like it to be, so switching the beverage program at even a couple of gay bars in the city makes access to queer spaces even more limited,” says Yi Chen, bartender at The Aviary NYC. “If gay bars are truly to remain about community, the message sent by cocktail-specific gay bars is one of alienation to those who can’t afford it, which implies a culture that I personally find problematic.”

Others believe queer establishments with quality cocktails would provide a welcome alternative to hard-partying gay nightlife. “I don’t really go to gay bars anymore,” Negranza says. “I just remember looking around and seeing people hooking up in the bathrooms or doing drugs on the dance floor. That’s totally fine and I think people should enjoy what they like, but it’s not for me. I like to have a nice cocktail or spirit.”

In recent years, a small handful of bars have aimed to strike a balance by serving good cocktails as well as their community. In 2016, Garrett McKechnie opened Mattachine Society, a gay cocktail bar in Los Angeles, but it sadly closed shortly thereafter. Fortunately, in early 2019, chef Angela Dimayuga, formerly of Mission Chinese Food, opened No Bar, a “new-wave gay bar” in New York City’s Standard East Village Hotel.

Dimayuga, who is lesbian and Filipina-American, says the higher-end bar suits the luxury hotel and its neighborhood, which is also home to some of the nation’s most acclaimed cocktail bars, like Death & Co. and PDT. While No Bar’s prices are competitive with those at surrounding establishments, inclusivity is important to Dimayuga. The bar is designed to serve the neighborhood’s ethnically diverse, queer-friendly crowd.

“When we introduced more affordable cocktails, we found our guests gravitated to the more high-end cocktails,” Dimayuga says. “The menu is very much a response to the neighborhood — high-end drinks and bar food in a space that is open and available to anyone. Our programming is created for the community it’s serving. There’s an extremely diverse set of people that feel at home at No Bar and we want to create nightly events that feel accessible to all.”

Events at No Bar also highlight the creative contributions of queer folks in New York, and include a monthly installment by Humberto Leon of Opening Ceremony.

When Shawn Vergara and his sister Tiffny Vergara Chung revamped their Brewcade bar in San Francisco’s historic gay neighborhood, The Castro, earlier this year, they wanted it to represent its location. Now called Detour, after a historic gay club, it serves elevated cocktails in an intergenerationally inclusive space.

“I’ve been drinking, partying, and working in the neighborhood for 15 to 20 years, but as I got older, I couldn’t find places where I could have a drink that was delicious, and that matched the place I was in my life,” Vergara says. “My palate had matured. And the mature crowd wants something a little more sophisticated. There was definitely something missing, and I wanted to show that gays can participate in cocktail culture, too.”

Caitlin Laman, founder of the cocktail conference Chicago Style, believes we could soon see many more gay-friendly or -focused cocktail bars like those McKechnie, Dimayuga, and Vergara have opened, but says those interested in courting the community need to do so thoughtfully. “The most important thing is that the people opening these bars be queer, and really care in order to create a space that’s opening and safe for the queer community — it’s going to take creative thinking on the business side and marketing side,” Laman says.

Beyond putting up rainbow stickers, some cocktail bars now do more to seek out the queer community when hiring — Facebook posts will make note of preference to qualified POC and LGBT applicants, for example. Others offer programming for LGBT patrons, such as Brooklyn’s Donna Cocktail Club, which hosts a queer happy hour every other Sunday, and Oakland’s Starline Social Club, which puts on a monthly queer dance party.

In July 2019, Christina Cabrera, 41, moderated a panel at Tales of the Cocktail called “Turning Allies Into Advocates.” It featured Negranza along with New York bar pioneer Julie Reiner and Whit Kathner of Washington, D.C.’s women-owned Republic Restoratives distillery.

“My seminar at Tales was the first of its kind. It took 15 years to have a queer-focused seminar,” Cabrera says. “I think the industry wants to be better, there are people out there who genuinely want to be more inclusive. I heard from straight people afterwards who said they were unaware of the struggle, and that they want to do things like be more conscious of pronouns.”

Cabrera, who serves as the New York ambassador for Grey Goose, says spirits brands have enormous potential to diversify the offerings in and impressions of queer cocktail bars. A lot of programming depends on what brands bars work with or have in stock. She points to brands like Stoli and Absolut, which have invested in the queer community for decades, along with some of Bacardi’s recent efforts during Word Pride NYC 2019.

“Our community is one to invest in — if all I can do is start the conversation, then I’ve done my part,” she says.

The success of establishments like No Bar and Detour shows that a delicate middle ground for gay cocktail bars can and should exist — as long as queer people are empowered to open them. “As a generation, we need to leave things better than how they were when we walked in,” says Cabrera. “Your dollars are your vote, so know what products you’re putting behind the bar. We appreciate you coming to the parade with us, but we need you to fight with us and fight for us.”

The article Gay Bar, Meet Cocktail Bar appeared first on VinePair.

source https://vinepair.com/articles/gay-bar-meet-cocktail-bar/

[isaiahrippinus]

Gay Bar, Meet Cocktail Bar

In a 2009 article for queer publication Between the Lines, writer Camper English laments the lack of “couture cocktails” at gay establishments, pointing to the stereotype that “we’re supposed to be trendy people.” Having covered cocktail culture since 2006, English believes drinks programs at gay bars have remained remarkably static as the bar and restaurant industry have drastically evolved.

Ten years later, he says that’s still the case. “It dawned on me that none of the gay bars were moving in the same direction as other bars — they were just doing the same old flavored vodka drinks, most without fresh juices or even drink menus,” English tells VinePair. “These days, there are some gay bars using fresh juices in their cocktails, at least, and more of the restaurants in gayborhoods are getting it right. But it seems generally that gay bar cocktails are about where nightclub cocktails are in terms of average quality.”

Of course, the high-volume drinks programs at some gay venues function primarily as social lubricants. They are designed to lower inhibitions, complementing the shirtless go-go dancers, pounding music, and condom dispensers. Why, though, can’t excellent cocktails and handy condoms coexist?

While the mixology movement has brought well-made Manhattans and Mojitos to hotel bars, cruise ship bars, piano bars, music festival bars, and, hell, even airplane bars, 20 years after the cocktail revolution launched in NYC, gay bars are one of the last places in America you can’t always find a good drink. With so many priorities to juggle, from shifting socioeconomics to vanishing venues, gay bars and cocktail culture are now at a historic crossroads.

“We think of cocktail bars as a place to go and have a curated experience,” says Alex Negranza, a gay bartender and director of operations at Tongue-Cut Sparrow and The Pastry War in Houston. “Historically, we don’t have that association in the gay bar scene because, for so long, gays were never afforded the luxury of a place to indulge. … They needed places to be safe, and be away from society.”

Much has changed, and continues to change, since bars like San Francisco’s Black Cat and New York’s Stonewall opened in underserved neighborhoods to provide refuge to gay communities in the 1950s. Namely, the steady closing of the “gay wage gap.” According to the latest studies from Prudential and the Harvard Business Review, the average queer American — albeit mostly cis white gay males — now earns as much if not more than their straight counterparts.

Then there’s the fact that today’s “gayborhoods,” like Chelsea in New York, Boystown in Chicago, or Montrose in Houston, are among their cities’ whitest and most affluent. Modern gay bars, likewise, no longer inhabit the same cultural and physical spaces as their predecessors. Widespread acceptance of LGBT culture in large cities, while offering safety and visibility for the community, has stripped these establishments of their edge. And, one could argue, their heart.

Some queer bartenders are hesitant to bring the craft cocktail movement, with its hand-cut ice and elevated price tags, into gay and lesbian bars because there are so few of them left. “The gay bar isn’t nearly as ubiquitous as we’d all like it to be, so switching the beverage program at even a couple of gay bars in the city makes access to queer spaces even more limited,” says Yi Chen, bartender at The Aviary NYC. “If gay bars are truly to remain about community, the message sent by cocktail-specific gay bars is one of alienation to those who can’t afford it, which implies a culture that I personally find problematic.”

Others believe queer establishments with quality cocktails would provide a welcome alternative to hard-partying gay nightlife. “I don’t really go to gay bars anymore,” Negranza says. “I just remember looking around and seeing people hooking up in the bathrooms or doing drugs on the dance floor. That’s totally fine and I think people should enjoy what they like, but it’s not for me. I like to have a nice cocktail or spirit.”

In recent years, a small handful of bars have aimed to strike a balance by serving good cocktails as well as their community. In 2016, Garrett McKechnie opened Mattachine Society, a gay cocktail bar in Los Angeles, but it sadly closed shortly thereafter. Fortunately, in early 2019, chef Angela Dimayuga, formerly of Mission Chinese Food, opened No Bar, a “new-wave gay bar” in New York City’s Standard East Village Hotel.

Dimayuga, who is lesbian and Filipina-American, says the higher-end bar suits the luxury hotel and its neighborhood, which is also home to some of the nation’s most acclaimed cocktail bars, like Death & Co. and PDT. While No Bar’s prices are competitive with those at surrounding establishments, inclusivity is important to Dimayuga. The bar is designed to serve the neighborhood’s ethnically diverse, queer-friendly crowd.

“When we introduced more affordable cocktails, we found our guests gravitated to the more high-end cocktails,” Dimayuga says. “The menu is very much a response to the neighborhood — high-end drinks and bar food in a space that is open and available to anyone. Our programming is created for the community it’s serving. There’s an extremely diverse set of people that feel at home at No Bar and we want to create nightly events that feel accessible to all.”

Events at No Bar also highlight the creative contributions of queer folks in New York, and include a monthly installment by Humberto Leon of Opening Ceremony.

When Shawn Vergara and his sister Tiffny Vergara Chung revamped their Brewcade bar in San Francisco’s historic gay neighborhood, The Castro, earlier this year, they wanted it to represent its location. Now called Detour, after a historic gay club, it serves elevated cocktails in an intergenerationally inclusive space.

“I’ve been drinking, partying, and working in the neighborhood for 15 to 20 years, but as I got older, I couldn’t find places where I could have a drink that was delicious, and that matched the place I was in my life,” Vergara says. “My palate had matured. And the mature crowd wants something a little more sophisticated. There was definitely something missing, and I wanted to show that gays can participate in cocktail culture, too.”

Caitlin Laman, founder of the cocktail conference Chicago Style, believes we could soon see many more gay-friendly or -focused cocktail bars like those McKechnie, Dimayuga, and Vergara have opened, but says those interested in courting the community need to do so thoughtfully. “The most important thing is that the people opening these bars be queer, and really care in order to create a space that’s opening and safe for the queer community — it’s going to take creative thinking on the business side and marketing side,” Laman says.

Beyond putting up rainbow stickers, some cocktail bars now do more to seek out the queer community when hiring — Facebook posts will make note of preference to qualified POC and LGBT applicants, for example. Others offer programming for LGBT patrons, such as Brooklyn’s Donna Cocktail Club, which hosts a queer happy hour every other Sunday, and Oakland’s Starline Social Club, which puts on a monthly queer dance party.

In July 2019, Christina Cabrera, 41, moderated a panel at Tales of the Cocktail called “Turning Allies Into Advocates.” It featured Negranza along with New York bar pioneer Julie Reiner and Whit Kathner of Washington, D.C.’s women-owned Republic Restoratives distillery.

“My seminar at Tales was the first of its kind. It took 15 years to have a queer-focused seminar,” Cabrera says. “I think the industry wants to be better, there are people out there who genuinely want to be more inclusive. I heard from straight people afterwards who said they were unaware of the struggle, and that they want to do things like be more conscious of pronouns.”

Cabrera, who serves as the New York ambassador for Grey Goose, says spirits brands have enormous potential to diversify the offerings in and impressions of queer cocktail bars. A lot of programming depends on what brands bars work with or have in stock. She points to brands like Stoli and Absolut, which have invested in the queer community for decades, along with some of Bacardi’s recent efforts during Word Pride NYC 2019.

“Our community is one to invest in — if all I can do is start the conversation, then I’ve done my part,” she says.

The success of establishments like No Bar and Detour shows that a delicate middle ground for gay cocktail bars can and should exist — as long as queer people are empowered to open them. “As a generation, we need to leave things better than how they were when we walked in,” says Cabrera. “Your dollars are your vote, so know what products you’re putting behind the bar. We appreciate you coming to the parade with us, but we need you to fight with us and fight for us.”

The article Gay Bar, Meet Cocktail Bar appeared first on VinePair.

source https://vinepair.com/articles/gay-bar-meet-cocktail-bar/ source https://vinology1.tumblr.com/post/189647059614

[theconservativebrief]

Earlier this year, influential drag performer RuPaul sat down for a political conversation with New York Times columnist Charles M. Blow during the fourth annual RuPaul’s DragCon in New York. After their discussion — which covered President Donald Trump, youth voting, and other issues — an attendee asked RuPaul about drag’s connection to the #MeToo movement. RuPaul said that both have a rebellious spirit.

“We’re saying to the structures of society, ‘Fuck you!’” RuPaul said. “In that regard, I think we’re well aligned with the movement.”

Although DragCon is a convention where drag queens can meet their fans, both the convention and the reality TV show that spawned it have become increasingly political over time and increasingly popular with teenagers, preteens, and younger kids who ask their parents to take them to the convention.

A mother and her preteen daughters pose for a picture with drag queens during RuPaul’s DragCon at the Los Angeles Convention Center, May 7, 2016, in Los Angeles, California. David McNew/AFP/Getty Images

Recent seasons of RuPaul’s Drag Race have featured House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi as a guest; contestants discussing conversion therapy while applying their makeup; and one performer, Bob the Drag Queen, describing his arrest during a 2011 marriage equality protest.

Similarly, previous DragCons in New York and Los Angeles have featured panels like “Drag In Trump’s America,” “The Art of Resistance” and “Liberty and Justice for All,” in which presenters from the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) showed everyday citizens different ways to become politically active.

At another panel, drag nuns from the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence shared their group’s 39-year history of activism. Meanwhile, in the exhibition hall, groups like the Human Rights Campaign and Swing Left, an organization focused on congressional races in US swing districts, educated attendees about policy issues and the importance of voter registration.

“DragCon has never been a bubble in denial about reality,” said Fenton Bailey and Randy Barbato, co-founders World of Wonder and DragCon and executive producers of RuPaul’s Drag Race, in a statement to Vox. “It’s a celebration of life through difference and diversity, and it’s about planting that flag in the ground and claiming our place in this world.”

Nonetheless, classifying drag only as a guilty pleasure underestimates its power, Bailey and Barbato say.

“Because as playful and as fun as drag can and will always be, it can also be serious fun, by playing with society’s norms in a very profound way. And drag only becomes more pointedly political in an environment where an illegitimate regime seeks — picking just one example — to impose reductive and cruel ideas about gender that fly in the face of gender’s proven complexity.”

While the US Supreme Court justices hear arguments surrounding the same-sex marriage ban, Proposition 8, A man dressed in drag known as “Queen,” from Florida, dances in front of the Court on March 26, 2013, in Washington, DC. Karen Bleier/AFP/Getty Images

In the modern age, drag queens have risen from obscure gay-bar performers to celebrities with an ever-expanding social media reach. As entertainers who straddle the gender divide and are known for their irreverent outspokenness, they may seem to be in a particularly unique position at this exact political moment to address the Republican pushback on the #MeToo movement and transgender rights.

But a closer look reveals a hazy view of the political change drag queens can actually create, a view that has some social conservatives alarmed nonetheless.

Drag queens as we know them in America really developed from vaudeville acts in the early 1900s that caricatured feminine stock characters like “the wench,” “the damsel” and “the prima donna,” according to Roger Baker, author of Drag: A History of Female Impersonation in the Performing Arts.

Since then, drag queens and impersonators of women have gone from kitschy 1930s comedy acts enjoyed by everyone alike to gay club acts where publicity would risk criminal charges, including transvestitism, prostitution, sodomy, and other “lewd and lascivious” acts that officers generally considered offensive, until around the 1970s.

But Chris Mitchell, a doctoral lecturer of gender and sexuality studies at Hunter College, told Vox that the current generation of politically active drag queens found early incubation in the Cockettes, a 1970s San Francisco queer performance troupe. Their ragtag shows lampooned highbrow theater musicals and satirized political events — for instance, their staging of the wedding of Richard Nixon’s daughter Tricia ended in an LSD-fueled orgy. While their performances failed to attain a national following, their free-spirited satirical irreverence arguably planted a seed that would later sprout around 1980 with the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.

The Sisters reportedly formed as an antidote to the boring conformity its founders saw occurring in San Francisco’s gay Castro District. So they donned nun’s habits, painted their faces in white and glittery makeup, and began different spectacles of public activism.

In 1980, they held a public “Rosary in Time of Nuclear Peril” to protest the 1979 nuclear meltdown at Three Mile Island, chased anti-gay Christian protesters out of the Castro and Polk neighborhoods, and raised money for Cuban refugees in a combination bingo game and disco.

Over the next two years, they’d host the first-known HIV fundraiser and support Sister Boom Boom’s campaign to unseat then-Mayor Dianne Feinstein, now a US senator. (Sister Boom Boom lost.)

Sister Missionary Position, a member of the activist group the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, holds gold-wrapped condoms they will distribute during Mardi Gras in New Orleans in 1987. Bettmann via Getty Images

The Sisters’ unique brand of community activism has continued into the present day as a global nonprofit organization with more than 1,000 nuns of every race, gender, and sexual orientation currently serving in 42 states, nine countries, and four continents.

Since then, Sister Roma from San Francisco has emerged as the organization’s most outspoken and visible member. Serving since 1987, she joined the San Francisco order when HIV and internal divisions had reduced its ranks to just five sisters.

During her service, she has helped fundraise more than $1 million for various LGBTQ charities and served as an emcee for numerous local non-LGBTQ related events and fundraisers, like Outward Bound and the Boys and Girls Club.

“We always believe that we should follow our hearts to the voting booth and remember that we’re voting for the future, we’re voting for the planet, we’re voting for our friends, our family, our community, equality, women, people of color, LGBTQ, all of that, all the good stuff,” Roma told Vox.

As a nonprofit, the Sisters cannot endorse any political candidates, but Roma says the San Francisco Sisters are pushing for Proposition C, a measure that would tax certain businesses to fund housing and homelessness services.

By simply going out in public, Roma tells Vox that her appearance as a drag nun immediately brings different layers of social activism like homophobia, misogyny, and religious oppression.

Sister Dana Van Iquity, a member of the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, serves dessert to John McKay at a community Thanksgiving meal organized by a gay church and a Catholic church in San Francisco’s Castro neighborhood on Thursday, November 25, 1999. Dan Krauss/AP

“I really do enjoy the power of the drag and the way that you see different people’s reaction to it,” Sister Roma says. She says when she’s in drag, people feel more inclined to donate money or speak personally to her. But naturally, some people find Roma and the Sisters off-putting because of their clownish makeup or the perception that their work mocks religion.

Sister Roma adds, “The Sisters quite often say, and I believe it’s 100 percent true, is that we are mirrors — really a reflection of the people who look at us. I can walk down the street from one corner to the next and get the entire gamut of reactions,” from people complimenting her makeup or asking to take pictures with her to people making snarky comments or calling her homophobic slurs. “I learned pretty early on is that people’s reactions to me say a lot more about them than they do about me.”

During her activism, Roma crossed paths with another drag queen called Lil’ Miss Hot Mess. The two worked together on the #MyNameIs campaign opposing Facebook’s 2014 “Real Names” policy that temporarily forced users to only create profiles based on the names on their government-issued ID.

Roma, Hot Mess, and other activists successfully argued that the policy unfairly targeted trans people, Native American people, well-known performers, and survivors of abuse who each use non-government-issued names for different legitimate purposes.

Drag queens Lil’ Miss Hot Mess (left) and Sister Roma (Center) and others walk to a news conference after meeting with San Francisco city officials to discuss Facebook’s name policy on September 17, 2014. Eric Risberg/AP

But since that battle, Hot Mess has gone on to become a board member of Drag Queen Story Hour, a different sort of community group that has recently gained the ire of social conservatives.

Drag Queen Story Hour was started in 2015 by Michelle Tea, an author and queer San Francisco parent who wanted more programs for LGBTQ parents and their kids.

The program is exactly what it sounds like: Drag performers wear extravagant makeup and age-appropriate outfits and read books to children for an hour. Though the queens sometimes read books with themes of diversity and inclusion, like And Tango Makes Three or Princess Boy, Lil’ Miss Hot Mess, a board member of Drag Queen Story Time, tells Vox that libraries and individual organizers choose what to read, sometimes choosing titles that fit seasonal themes.

It’s now a national nonprofit organization whose program has been replicated in public libraries in 27 states.

Lil’ Miss Hot Mess reads to a group of young children during Drag Queen Story Hour at the Brooklyn Public Library in Park Slope on May 13, 2017. Mary Altaffer/AP

A group of anti-gay activists in Houston filed a federal lawsuit against the mayor and the head of the municipal library system for allowing Drag Queen Story Hour to happen at a local library. The Campaign for Houston PAC helped file a lawsuit stating their opposition to “taxpayer dollars [being] used for a drag queen to come in and indoctrinate our young kids.”

The group that filed the lawsuit became known among LGBTQ activists around 2015 when they successfully overturned the Houston Equal Rights Ordinance preventing any forms of discrimination against transgender people.

Hot Mess told Vox that Drag Queen Story Hour operates without taxpayer funds — all a library needs to host one is a children’s book and a drag queen willing to volunteer. Chief US District Judge Lee H. Rosenthal denied the lawsuit a hearing four days after it was filed, stating, “There is no basis to support the requested relief.”

Nonetheless, Campaign for Houston PAC attorney and spokesperson Jared Woodfill says his group will spend $500,000 on mailers and TV ads to oppose the program and shut it down. The group has already started running campaign ads and postcards (with images of drag queens reading to kids) to urge voter to choose Republican candidates.

“In some ways it feels like a backlash,” Hot Mess says, “but I think the reality is that this is exactly the kind of hate that’s been going on for a long time, that queer people have been fighting for a long time. It’s really just the bias of conservative and right-wing people who think we shouldn’t exist at all.”

Protesters of the Drag Queen Story Hour hold a cross outside of the Mobile Public Library in Alabama on September 8, 2018. Dan Anderson/AP

Meanwhile, in the face of mounting political opposition, Drag Queen Story Hour is currently crowdfunding $10,000 to offer support to current and future programs across the US. This support will include a database of drag queens and public libraries interested in participating; a guide to putting on these events; and suggested reading and conversation guides for librarians, teachers, and parents to foster larger conversations about diversity and acceptance.

Hot Mess says many children’s books, from Harry Potter to The Hunger Games, tell stories about kids standing up to authority and resisting unfair social standards, fighting evil, and working together to build a better world.

“I think that what drag queens are doing, hopefully or ideally, isn’t really all that different,” she says. “I think the only thing that we’re ‘indoctrinating’ are values of acceptance and diversity and letting people express themselves and be who they are. It’s shameful to me that those kinds of values are things that people want to protest.”

In the April 26, 2018, episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race, then 22-year-old performer Blair St. Clair unexpectedly became the face of #MeToo in drag when she explained that her delicate, feminine aesthetic stems from experiencing a sexual assault earlier in her life.

She tells Vox she hadn’t planned on discussing it beforehand and shared viewers’ surprise at the sudden admission. But by uttering it, she has become the only queen among the show’s 126 competitors over 10 seasons to ever discuss sexual assault on the show.

“I’m overwhelmed in a positive way at how many people — gay men and queens especially — have opened up to me privately,” St. Clair tells Vox. “I never expected to be that voice or that face. It has been incredible … I always needed someone to look up to. If I can be that person for those people, then I feel like I’ve done some justice.”

Blair St. Clair poses for a photograph at RuPaul’s DragCon at the Los Angeles Convention Center on May 12, 2018. Chelsea Guglielmino/Getty Images

It’s important to assess the impact of St. Clair’s story on the show’s small but fiercely devoted viewership.

St. Clair’s admission compelled various LGBTQ and mainstream websites to publish articles about sexual assault in the gay community, a topic that rarely, if ever, gets mentioned at gay bars where alcohol and cruising add to the atmosphere.

A 2015 report from the National Sexual Violence Resource Center said that 40.2 percent of gay men and 47.4 percent of bisexual men experience sexual assault; 63 percent of assaults go unreported, partly because of social expectations that men should always enjoy sex or be “strong” enough to fend off an attack.

In subsequent interviews, St. Clair stressed the importance of speaking openly about sexual assault and alluded to her long, personal healing process. And yet she told Vox that she’s saddened by the fact that other sexual assault survivors often face accusations of being calculating or fabricating their stories.

“It’s so ridiculous that people have to live in fear now of telling their stories … [and] in fear of setting themselves free because they’re afraid of what other people are going to think,” St. Clair says.

It’s also important to emphasize how radically RuPaul’s Drag Race has changed the popularity of drag performers in America. The show snagged six Emmy Awards this year, including the award for Outstanding Reality-Competition Program, beating out shows with much larger viewerships like The Amazing Race and The Voice.

Past and present Drag Race competitors can brag upward of a million social media followers — and the show’s young viewership will happily shell out serious cash to see their favorite performers at a local venue or a DragCon event.

RuPaul (center) during the ceremonial ribbon cutting at DragCon NYC 2018. Santiago Felipe/Getty Images

But not all Drag Race contestants speak out politically in fear of alienating fans — something that irritates longtime drag performer Jackie Beat. In July 2018, Beat criticized former Drag Race competitors via Twitter for not using their social media followings to speak out more forcefully against Trump. She tweeted:

“It’s 2018. Our country is going to Hell in a designer handbag. If you’re a drag queen, ESPECIALLY ONE WHO WAS ON THAT TV SHOW THAT INSTANTLY AFFORDS ONE RECOGNITION & FAME AMONG YOUNG PEOPLE, & you refuse to ‘get political’ — FUCK YOU. I’m not asking you to march or give lengthy speeches… Just sit on your padded ass & tweet ANYTHING. Make a point, take a stand. Stop playing it down the middle, bitch. LET YOUR FANS KNOW EXACTLY WHO YOU ARE. And more importantly, WHO YOU AREN’T.”

Beat is a Los Angeles-based drag performer who has performed in numerous benefits for all sorts of causes: AIDS/HIV awareness, animal rights, reproductive justice, immigration, and various legislation. To her, drag queens can be superheroes whose superpower is simply telling the truth, albeit in comedic or entertaining ways.

Beat tells Vox that any drag queen who meets with parents and children at DragCon or a touring drag show should remind them that “beneath the clown everyone is laughing at is either a gay man or a trans person who is directly in the crosshairs of the Trump administration’s rifle.”

“If you have been granted a certain amount of mainstream fame,” she tells Vox, “It’s your duty to speak out about things that threaten and/or violate the very rights that allow you to do what you do.”

She continues, “It’s vital for young people to know that what is happening is not right. It’s crucial that people with a strong social media presence remind their many fans that this is not normal. Otherwise, we all just treat it like it’s a crazy reality show. And it’s not. It’s really life. And it’s getting real ugly. I see a lot of queens finally speaking up for our trans brothers and sisters, and it makes me so happy. I’m just saying that if you are worried about losing, alienating or boring your fans then, in my opinion, you’re doing drag for all the wrong reasons. Be a person first and a clown second.”

But if St. Clair now demurs about discussing politics, other former competitors, like season five winner Jinkx Monsoon and season 10 competitor the Vixen, use their fame to encourage fans to vote or to join campaigns against homophobia.

Among the show’s most outspoken and politically engaged winners is Bob the Drag Queen, the season eight champion.

During Bob’s season, the performer mentioned a personal tagline, “Bob the Drag Queen: A Queen for the People,” and discussed his arrest by New York City Police for blocking a roadway with a giant banner during a 2011 marriage equality protest.

“They fucking threw my ass in jail, in full drag, girl.”

Discussing the importance of political involvement, the queen told viewers, “You don’t have to go get arrested. Just [do] something. Something as simple as voting.”

To Bob, Trump is merely a symptom or a reflection of longer ongoing issues in America like racism, sexism, misogyny, transphobia, and homophobia. Whenever the queen sees white fans publicly declare, “These are the darkest times we’ve ever had,” Bob told Vox that it feels like a slap in the face of enslaved people, prisoners, and other people of color who have faced far darker times.

Bob the Drag Queen performs at New York City Pride on June 24, 2016. Monica Schipper/Getty Images

Bob agrees that drag has a definitely unique vantage point in the world of gender politics, but, “The more I travel, the more I realize that maybe it’s not as unique … because drag is basically just performing femininity or … toying with sex outside of the assigned gender you were given at birth,” something that the performer sees people doing all over the world, especially young people.

When Bob first started performing in drag, the audience consisted mainly of other gay men. These days, Bob’s touring audiences consist largely of preteen girls.

“Many of those girls would’ve never had an experience talking about gender or gender issues, or even race issues,” Bob says. YEt the performer hears people in the younger generation saying things like “gender is a construct,” after overhearing their favorite drag queen saying it. These teens don’t emptily parrot these sentiments, Bob says, but start exploring and researching it in their own lives.

Like Roma, Bob doesn’t begrudge drag queens who don’t use their fame to address politics, but they also don’t think that conservatives and Republicans will find a place on the drag runway.

Consider the case of Elaine Lancaster, the South Florida drag performer who, in October 2017, was removed as the emcee of a drag brunch at Señor Frogs after posting a tweet that used the hashtag #JewishCollusion when linking to a story about Facebook’s CEO supposedly meeting with Hillary Clinton’s campaign manager John Podesta before the 2016 election.

At the time, Lancaster claimed she quit the drag brunch gig to travel the world with right-wing author Milo Yiannopoulos. But three months earlier on CNN, she lamented being professionally “blackballed” from her decades-long drag career after coming out as a Trump supporter.

“I come from a community that touts that we are so inclusive, we are so embracing of what’s different, all we ask for is tolerance and equality,” she told the Miami Herald after her CNN appearance. “I make a living as a female impersonator in the state of Florida. I have hosted all the major events — White Party for 19 years. When I came out as a supporter of Trump … I was thrown off the [White Party] committee. I couldn’t be the emcee anymore. I got death threats. I have lawsuits pending against people.”

Lancaster did not respond to a request for comment from Vox.

Roma says she had known Lancaster for years as a friendly acquaintance, never realizing her far-right political views. “I wonder if she thinks she’s going to be the first drag queen in the White House,” Roma says.

“I don’t know why you’d want to go out and support a candidate, and a political party, that would just as soon throw you in prison or strip you of your human rights or watch you die in the streets … she tried to explain to me that she wants to have a place at the table. I’m like, ‘Girl, they wouldn’t let you anywhere near the table.’”

Miami-based drag queen Elaine Lancasters waits for President Donald Trump to speak at a rally in Estero, Florida, on October 31, 2018. Susan Walsh/AP

Roma says she admires Lancaster somewhat for facing online harassment and career hardships while voicing her political views, but adds that it has been difficult to watch Lancaster go through it.

Bob, however, supposes, “If you’re a Trump supporter, no other drag queens are going to support you. You’re gonna have a bunch of crunchy, raggedy-ass drag queens who are supporting you, but outside of the community, you will get nothing. … If you vote against the right of your community, you do not deserve asylum from your community … or you [may] deserve it, but you won’t get it.”

Perhaps they feel this way because contemporary politics under Trump seem so antithetical to the gender playfulness and LGBTQ community so closely associated to drag queens.

An aerial view of the convention floor at RuPaul’s DragCon NYC 2017. Santiago Felipe/Getty Images

But even on the left side of the political spectrum, Mitchell from Hunter College thinks drag can only do so much. Mainly because while America’s LGBTQ people have long huddled in gay bars as one of their community’s only safe places, it was more out of necessity rather than commonality, Mitchell says.

Mitchell tells Vox that while drag incorporates cultural aspects from each of the LGBTQ community’s individual segments — with some women performing as drag kings and other trans, queer, and nonbinary performers working as drag queens too — the art form can’t be expected to express the complicated class, racial, and gender divisions experienced by distinct queer groups. This is especially true of drag since it remains largely a cisgender male pursuit whose professional echelons requires lots of free time and money.

Even shows like Drag Race still operate with certain ideas of what constitutes praiseworthy drag, and their acting challenges often rely on clichéd caricatures of histrionic women using their sexuality and feminine wiles to catfight one another.

RuPaul’s comments earlier this year comparing hormone replacement therapy and gender-affirming surgeries to “performance enhancing drugs” in her reality TV competition showed that even the torch bearer of inclusive queer entertainment still knew little about the number of transgender people already performing in drag.

So while drag queens may find themselves increasingly in a position to sway fans and younger generations about gender expression and political involvement, Mitchell thinks the inherent contradictions of drag performance and LGBTQ politics ultimately limits their power to dramatically shape the political landscape.

”To me, there’s not just one drag, and it is a little bit of a Rorschach test,” Mitchell says. “When you ask different kinds of queers what they see when they look at drag, you’re going to get really different kinds of answers. And a lot of times it’s going to tell you about the identity of the person who’s talking more than it’s going to tell you about drag.”

Lil’ Miss Hot Mess put on the final touches of an outfit before going to reading to children for Drag Queen Story Hour at the Brooklyn Public Library. Mary Altaffer/AP

Original Source -> Drag queens are more political than ever. Can they lead a movement?

via The Conservative Brief

[enbyflock2]

CWMEA Presentation-”Transgender Discussion and Music: A Non-Binary Voice” Sketches Part 1

With my Bachelor’s degree from University of Puget Sound, I have hope and anticipation for what is to come of my future. I am at Puget Sound for the Masters in Teaching Program, and after that I am looking forward to becoming a high school band teacher in a Washington state school district.

 My life experience as a musician has been full of magic and excitement. My Bachelor’s degree was in music education, and the instrument I studied with was saxophone, specifically alto. Even though my degree was tailored towards education, I still pushed myself towards the highest standards as a performer, and I kept involved with a lot of different groups, ensembles, and competitions. I was in Wind Ensemble, Jazz Orchestra, Saxophone Quartet, and I performed solo repertory. I competed in the MTNA events for both solo and chamber music repertory. The hugest honor I won as a performer was the Concerto/Aria competition, where I performed the Maslanka Saxophone Concerto Movements 1 and 4 with my school’s Wind Ensemble. I’ve also been a performer outside my school settings. I am an occasional singer-songwriter, guitarist, composer, and recording artist.

 When I go into teaching, I have certain monikers that I need my students to address me by: Teacher Flock. Not a sir or ma’am. Not a man or woman. Simply a person, buddy, friend, partner. Someone that always found gender binary monikers oppressive and limiting, because of the hard weight of what those monikers meant to me in my life experience. Someone that cannot bear to be called by the pronouns “he/him/his/himself” or “she/her/hers/herself.” Pronouns to refer to me: singular “they/them/theirs/themselves.”

 My identity as a musician is inescapably tied into my identity as a musician. Yes, I 100% identify as transgender. But because of the role that music played in my life I’ve learned to love my body. I never want to physically transition, or take hormones, or alter my body with surgery.

 When I look at the first time I threw on a dress my senior year of college, I slowly woke up to a scary and beautiful perspective that it was predestination that I wound up studying music. As I hope you are going to see throughout this presentation, music addressed all my problems I was facing as a transgender person. My name is Timmie Flock, and I am genderqueer and non-binary. I am an advocate for the trans, queer, and non-binary community. I have some experience volunteering with queer youth in Tacoma at the Oasis Youth Center. This project is the center-piece of my advocacy work. Music is the place I reclaim my relationship towards my body.

On the sheets I handed out to you, I have provided some definitions surrounding queer terminology that I feel like are important for you to know about. I encourage you to refer to this sheet throughout the course of this presentation when I am bringing up terminology that you may need a refresher on.

A couple things I would like to note about these definitions and terminology: they are flexible. As you can see with the important notice near the middle of page two, there are transgender people that feel the need to bodily transition, but it is not a requirement for identifying as transgender. People can use non-binary, but can still tailor it towards binary language. The phrase “trans and non-binary” is also inclusive of the non-binary folks that consider themselves outside the realm of transgender and cis gender. Using the phrase “trans and non-binary” is not meant to separate them as mutually exclusive categories.

 The final thing I would like to note is referring to the definitions that are more psychological, especially the definitions regarding dysphoria. When we are taking a look at body and social dysphoria, it can be complex in that we can talk about the dysphoria in separate levels, but they are also interconnected and extensions of similar concepts. Even though pronouns and a different gender presentation can help alleviate social dysphoria, it can also make a trans or non-binary person feel comfortable within their own body, and alleviate that body dysphoria. Likewise, body transitions and hormones alleviate body dysphoria, as can tucking and binding, and this takes away some of that social dysphoria.

 The flexibility within these definitions doesn’t make the definitions shallow or frivolous by any means. Part of the flexibility is that the language to discuss gender is ever-changing and advancing, and some statements that trans and non-binary people may have made 5-10 years ago is now seen as offensive today. One example is that there are folks that are still partial to the phrase “I felt born in the wrong body.” But now there are folks that change it more subtly by saying “I was socialized in a certain way because of the body I was born in,” or an even more brash way of putting it: “Transgender people were treated horribly because of the body they were born in.” What may be language that is flexible is also language that is highly personal. This language holds vast and important significance personally, culturally, socially, and psychologically.

If this language seems frivolous at first glance, let’s think about other language that is flexible, but holds vast and important significance in personal, cultural, and social content: music genres. Jazz, hip hop, rock, classical. All of these genres can be deconstructed and pushed to the edge of their confines, but when we throw something of music into a genre label, we are trying to capture and pinpoint an essence and spirit within the music.

 Music genres have never really been historically as linear as we’d like to think, and when music genres have come about, there was never an instance of saying something like: “Okay! Here are the rules of jazz music: swing, horn sections, rhythm sections, improvisation, and only black artists! Follow it!” Instead of that, I would like you to turn to page four in the section “What makes an identity?”

 Instead of focusing this question of gender, let’s turn it to music genres. When we eventually come about with placing a genre word expression on particular kinds of music that may be vast, we are not saying these are hard and fast rules that need to be followed for jazz. But instead, we are saying it as a measure of consistency, habits, and patterns in expressions across a lifetime of jazz over the past century. Furthermore, we are measuring how far these expressions have strayed in comparison to other music that had been made across history, and how it warrants a new label. We don’t only stop there, but then we look at how the individuals and communities that created their music, and look at how they interpreted their understanding of self and culture through these consistencies, habits, and patterns in expressions, and simply what the expressions meant to them. Whenever there is a work of a jazz artist that comes about as being considered the best or the most quality, (whether that’s a work deemed best by the artist, the culture, or the fans), it is usually because that work is seen as embodying all the expressions that is regarded as most reflective of a sense of the artist’s identity.

Before I discovered my gender identity, I used to struggle a lot with grasping these definitions for music, and trying to understand the essence and spirit of music in general. I was really challenged to try and remind myself, what are the values we hold towards music in general? What are we seeking out from music?

 Some common core values we try to seek out in music are surrounding the organization of the music composition. Rhythm, time, tempo, key signature, scales, etc. All of these are important facets within music that can really capture why we love it so much.

 Another value of music we take a look at is the performance. The instruments they are using, the timbres, sound effects, etc. and how all these factors add up into emoting a response and connection from the listener, and even the performer’s purely internal self. How do the performers interact with the organization of the music to emote something reflective of them, and emote something from the listener?

 A final value of music to look at is relating to a community, other individuals, the individual self, and culture. Music holds significant cultural context, and are often used as artifacts and by means of relating to the world, communities, other people, and the purely internal self.

I’m going to play this example for you, and I want you to tell me what genre this sounds like, and some other associations you may have with this genre.

https://drive.google.com/open?id=0BwVtq3-4ILHWMnJybjQ1dGhneFE

Can you name some of these artists?

 So when I hear this example, I think of hard rock music. We can hear a lot of mid-tempo in these examples, distorted guitar, heavy drums, heavy bass, and abrasive vocal timbre. Compositionally, it’s pretty basic and straightforward. 4/4 time signatures usually, based in pentatonic and blues scales.

 Can you tell me what you imagine the cultures, social implications, and communities behind this music entails?

 For me, what this music has meant in my lifetime, I consider this to be “music with a male energy” behind it. Many of the social constructions in my lifetime I’ve had surrounding this music is that these tunes were being popularized again with games such as Guitar Hero and Rock Band coming into fruition, and so many of the boys my age in late elementary school and sixth grade were coming around and discovering these classics again. I also have fond memories about the movie School of Rock coming out, and Jack Black being an influential icon at the time for a lot of my male friends.

 I do critically measure this as “music with a male energy” in my lifetime, because it simply was. I grew up in the town Clarkston, WA on the east side of the state. It is a small town, with many people who, yes, I would throw under a term kind of “redneck.” (Which I say with affection!) While there were women that liked these kinds of artist as well, I felt the weight of it being primarily enjoyed by my male friends in fifth to seventh grade. The way I also interpreted my interactions with them is that they were not the most fond of pop music on the radio, something that many friends that were girls at that age liked instead. I could be dead wrong with this interpretation, and maybe if you were to interact with my friends at the time from those grades, they may tell you I’m wrong. Nevertheless, this was how I very strongly remember and interpreted my environment at the time. And there was a short period of time when I really liked this music as well, especially in the sixth grade.

I’m going to play this example for you, and I want you to tell me what genre this sounds like, and some other associations you may have with this genre.

 https://drive.google.com/open?id=0BwVtq3-4ILHWMUxvMUNicnk2bU0

 So when I hear this example, I still hear this as rock music. It’s just a little different and warped. A lot of these examples have consistencies, habits, and patterns of expression that you can align with hard rock music. Only there are certain facets of it that are pushed to an extreme. On many of these examples, you hear vocals that can be considered hard rock, but you can hear them being pushed to an edge that’s pretty different, absurd, and satirical from what you’ve heard in the first example. The lyrical topics are slightly different, and are either very politically charged or satirical in nature, or are absolutely nonsensical. When we focus on the instrumentation and the interaction with the harmonies, we hear many common rhythms of rock music being emulated, but then we hear something that is throwing it off: bad, inappropriate sound effects, or an intentional deconstruction of the typical harmonies being used in rock music.

 Can you tell me what you imagine the cultures, social implications, and communities behind this music entails?

 I consider this to be a “non-binary person appreciating a ‘male energy’ in rock music.”

 What I really want to stress and emphasize about the importance of this music sample is that, when I was seeking out this music, I was honestly just trying to be myself. I became very obsessive and eager to seek out this kind of music actively, and always felt this intense sensation that this was the music I needed to listen to during the time of sixth grade to ninth grade. I absolutely loved it every time I found a band or a song that could fit under these categories. “Obsession” was not an understatement. I bought several of these bands’ albums and listened to them all the time. I’d obsessively watch their interviews every night before going to bed. I tried to emulate their guitar playing styles, and the ridiculous vocal stunts. I was mesmerized, and completely engulfed in this sound world.

 When I try to place this music sample within frameworks of music appreciation, I would often do it in a self-conscious manner, and really negate myself as a musician for being engulfed with this. The organization of the music composition in this sample was either within that same basic framework of rock music, and not very complex within more serious studies of music such as classical or jazz. Or the organization was sloppy, unfocused, and even if intentionally deconstructing compositional aspects of rock it was not necessarily qualifying as academic.

 When we look at the performance, it’s once again something difficult to place under categories. Some of the players heard in the examples are very skilled musicians playing their instruments very proficiently, and perhaps in an arguably more proficient manner than the first example. While there’s arguably more proficiency, it’s undercut by all the absurd sound effects thrown into the performance and the ridiculous vocal stunts. Some of the instrument players in here arguably are lacking in proficiency on their instruments, and are just exploring noisy sounds.

 But when I try to look at this music in terms of relating to a community, culture, other individuals, or the purely internal self, there’s a lot that was actually going on here! I will say that teachers and music teachers looking at me listening to this kind of music in general may have really stumped them with thinking about how they saw me trying to relate to my community, or exactly what cultural aspects of school I was trying to participate in. As far as directly relating to individuals through the means of showing them this kind of music… that never worked. As the boys I would play this music to simply didn’t understand it, and thought me to be weird for being so obsessive with this music.

 However, once I decided to keep this kind of music obsession as more of a private affair separated from the guise of my male friends, I found this music to be an extremely socially stabilizing force within my life. It was a means of relating to a community, culture, other individuals, and my purely internal self, if not directly through showing this music to my friends.

 If you are wondering how so, let’s just say that, because of my gender identity, I always felt different, even from the very early age of five. My first memories I had with gender was when I was the only one in a “boy’s body” in a tap dancing class at the age of five. I was dancing with girls in the class, and many people found this to be a problem. What’s difficult for me is that, somewhere along the way, my parents must have thought I was acting too feminine because I was around all those girls, and then they hopped on board with finding it problematic. It’s understandable, as the household I was raised in was one white, Catholic, rich, and Republican.

 They ejected me from the class. This still didn’t keep me from having nearly all my friends be girls in early elementary school, from ages 5-7, as I felt like I understood them most. But, since I was happy and used to girls, I was often called out in later elementary school for being too feminine, and I still remember that kid in fifth grade that looked me straight in the face and said: “You walk like a girl. You talk like a girl. You act like a girl. You ARE a girl.”

 Eventually, puberty hit around sometime in sixth and seventh grade, and I discovered I was sexually attracted to those boys that appeared to be all straight and cis gender. I felt absolutely traumatized. It was even harder, as continuing to even relate to the boys within a level of gender identity was a real challenge for me. And that is when I turned to the music.

 If there were to be one particular aspect of boyhood growing up into manhood that I felt I never particularly understood, it was a male-centric sense of humor, and those aspects of boyhood that were all about competitiveness and trying to win in a game and argument on who could make fun of whichever boys the most. It’s important to note that I didn’t hate a male sense of humor by any means, if I found it to truly and honestly not be hurting and subjugating anyone, and followed up by something authentically affirming and positive that reassured a friendship. It’s just that I felt I couldn’t express myself that way and be authentically myself.

 However, since I had to keep my sexual and gender identity from my parents, I needed to relate the boys in order to socially pass as straight and cis gender for my environment. So when I was discovering that kind of music you hear in the first sample, there was something reflective in that music that I saw within that boyhood: a sense of humor, competitiveness, and aggression. I found the vocal timbres and timbres used within the instrumentation from the first sample humorous and emoting that sense of humor within the boys, and I found the rhythm and beat to be competitive and emoting a sense of male aggression and specifically emoting that sense of competitiveness and aggression within the boys. When I hit puberty, I reached a small point where I simply couldn’t bear this kind of music anymore, but I couldn’t really hold onto anything else in relating to boyhood and manhood.

 So when I started transitioning towards music like what you hear in the second sample, I didn’t realize it at the time, but I was socializing myself to be like a boy by means of this sort of overcompensation. In my head, when I was able to hear the ridiculous vocal stunts being taken to that extreme and I could learn to actively love that kind of music, and even the individuals making that kind of music, I honestly felt like I could have a better appreciation for music in the first sample, and I also honestly felt myself better communicating authentically with the boys because I could understand them better. When I was able to spin around in my head all these extra excess noises and commentary in the music that seemed to be competing with itself to get as absurd and out there as possible and actively love this kind of music, and the individuals making that kind of music through their interviews, I honestly felt like I could have a better appreciation for music in the first sample, and I also honestly felt myself better communicating authentically with the boys.

 As I just did with my quick analysis with the means of composition and performance, I am smart enough to notice the differences in expressions in these two music samples. As I am sitting here in the room right now absorbed within this interaction of you all, I am honestly hearing this music as being different from each other. But what is so difficult for me to explain, as a trans, non-binary, and genderqueer person is that, when I go home for the day all by myself and not in the presence of anyone else, with only my body and spirit, I completely struggle to hear a difference in these music samples. Even after I still have that grip of quick analysis that I just delivered, I honestly struggle hearing much of a difference. Maybe this is because part of me still feels both of these samples should emote reactions of what I expect from boys. Maybe it’s because, since I was able to use this music as a means to “overcompensate” socially, but also to empathize with other music and characteristics within boys, they both emote very similar reactions within me, even if the latter sample I prefer.

(to be continued)

(hopefully on next sketch, I will be writing about me as a non-binary person appreciating a female energy in pop music, how I grew as a music student from this start as a musician, the psychological consensus surrounding gender identity, and paradigms in art music composition)

[nancygduarteus]

How Twitter Fuels Anxiety

In Ralph Waldo Emerson's famous essay on self-reliance, the 19th-century writer and naturalist sang the praises of spiritual isolation and the evils of distraction, bemoaning the forces that conspired to direct his attention to "emphatic trifles." He would not be cowed, he said, but would stand resolute in the face of such bad influences: "The power men possess to annoy me, I give them by a weak curiosity ... If we cannot at once rise to the sanctities of obedience and faith, let us at least resist our temptations."

Don't tell Ralph about Twitter.

I joined Twitter in 2009 at the urging of my husband, who works in technology. "What am I going to do, tell the internet what I ate for breakfast?" I asked him. Eight years later, I'm the one checking Twitter over my morning toast while he gets ready for work. Twitter has become the place where I get my news, where I check in on my friends, where I go to make jokes and read good essays. As a lifelong sufferer of anxiety, it is where I go to talk about what I’m feeling when I’m anxious, and maybe find some camaraderie. And as a lifelong sufferer of anxiety, using Twitter is also making my anxiety worse. The like-minded community I’ve built on Twitter has made confessing anxiety easier than ever, but the comparison Twitter enables has made the experience of anxiety worse. And when it comes to Twitter, you have to take the good with the bad.

Psychologists typically distinguish between two types of anxiety: trait anxiety, a persistent and lasting tendency to experience fear and worry; and state anxiety, a temporary response of fear to a threatening situation. Many forms of social media can agitate both trait and state anxiety, and perhaps none more so than Twitter, which reminds the perpetually anxious that we always have something to be anxious about and instills a sense of anxiety in even the most laid-back user. Twitter’s constant flow of new information and the fact that users tend to follow people who are more accomplished and successful than they are creates an especially potent cocktail of comparison for anxious people. "Twitter really inflames my professional anxiety," says Caitlin Cruz, a freelance journalist based in New York. "But it's also given me a lot of professional success." Cruz deleted the Twitter app from her phone a few weeks ago, which she says has made her life more bearable.

Twitter users have to contend with competing voices that yell at you as soon as you log on. You haven't written a best-selling novel yet? Here's a “30 Under 30” list of best-selling novelists! You're over 30? Here's an article about how you're a bad parent! You haven't had children yet? This bestselling author has three, and she's under 30! Twitter is a megaphone for achievements and a magnifying glass for insecurities, and when you start comparing your insecurities with another person's achievements, it's a recipe for anxiety.

"Generally speaking, the comparisons that we make on social media are more like to be 'upward' comparisons," says Azadeh Aalai, a professor of psychology at Montgomery College in Maryland. "We're comparing ourselves to the individuals who appear to be higher status and are achieving more" than we are, which can lead to feelings of envy, discontent, and anxiety. It's also not the whole story. When I was young, my mom used to warn me against "comparing my insides to other people's outsides." Using Twitter, I am constantly comparing my insides—my anxieties, fears, and insecurities—with other people's outward selves: their accomplishments, polished selfies, and edited articles. There will always be someone who’s doing better than I am in any aspect of my life. And because I, like many people, tend to follow people I admire or who are already famous, I am constantly aware of just how much better other people are. Twitter also gives me a quick and handy way to quantify my worth: this many likes, this many retweets. I'd like to think I'm more than the sum of my followers, but there are plenty of days when I don't feel that way.

Anxiety functions by constantly reminding you to pay attention to it. And so does Twitter. Twitter draws users back for more and more and more. Smartphones are designed to provide instant gratification, and many of Twitter's features depend on our biological fear of scarcity, says Pamela Rutledge, the director of the Media Psychology Research Center. The push notifications, the little number next to our mentions, the bar that tells us how many tweets have been sent since we last refreshed the page—all of these details are designed to keep users coming back, afraid that we might have missed something vital. "Social media doesn't really promote moderation," Aalai says (in what could perhaps be the understatement of the year).

The desire to know what is going on at every moment is quenched when met with the firehose of information that is Twitter. But my anxiety skyrockets when I’m met with the seemingly endless amount of bad news about tragic events going on around the world—ISIS bombings, systemic racism, refugees in crisis, the threat of war, political upheaval. Many Twitter users I surveyed cited feeling powerless in the face of overwhelming fear as one of the biggest causes of their anxiety. Even if it does offer the occasional practical solution—donating to the International Rescue Committee, calling a congressperson, sharing a GoFundMe—Twitter remains dominantly focused on the world's ills in a way that can decimate a person's sense of efficacy and replace it with profound despair.

If Twitter is full of bad news and anxiety-inducing fodder for comparison, why are we there in the first place? Some people, like the writer Lindy West, have left Twitter altogether due to harassment and trolling, while the New York Times columnist Bret Stephens just announced he would leave Twitter because it had become "pornified politics," although he isn't really leaving—"I'll keep my Twitter handle, and hopefully my followers," he wrote, and an editorial assistant will update the profile for him. But the rest of users are there, presumably, because they find some value amid the constant updates and jokes and hot takes. Twitter provides a sense of camaraderie.

Twitter provides a platform for neurotic people to share their fears. And for those of us who work from home or on the road, Twitter becomes an office space and the people we interact with become our coworkers. A recent Harvard University study found that "the act of disclosing information about oneself activates the same part of the brain that is associated with the sensation of pleasure"—the same pleasure center that is activated by food, money, and sex. Confessing my anxiety on social media, then, is an attempt not to feel so alone. Anxiety isolates the people who suffer from it, convincing them that they are the only ones who think in this distorted way. Bringing this kind of myopic thinking into the light and examining it can help combat it, and Twitter can actually be a useful place for doing just that. "You're anxious? Me, too!" is the kind of rallying cry that unites anxious people. But even as we find our tribe of fellow worriers, the question remains: What are we using Twitter for?

In no particular order, these are some of the reasons I use Twitter: to check the news, to procrastinate, to see what my friends are up to, to stave off boredom, to find an article I've been wanting to read, to seek out new voices to listen to, to make myself feel better by sharing what I've accomplished, to see what people are saying to me. In other words, Twitter mimics a lot of the everyday interactions I have—only without the benefit of being face-to-face. People with social anxiety can use Twitter to replicate those in-person interactions, but the anxiety can remain. Twitter users I spoke with often worried about how they were perceived online, and the need for external approval has been correlated with an increased sense of anxiety on social media. A person can find both solidarity and isolation on Twitter, which is part of the medium's magnetic pull—you never know how you're going to feel when you open it up.

Rutledge encourages Twitter users to think about why they're online. "If you're checking Twitter a hundred times a day, what are you avoiding doing?" she asks. "That's where you need cognitive override," or the ability to step out of the moment at hand and evaluate how realistic your feelings are given your use of this technology. "When we're anxious, we feel compelled to be continually scanning the environment," Rutledge says. "That's how we make ourselves feel safe." It's what our ancestors did to anticipate attacks from enemies or saber-toothed tigers, but the advantage now isn’t quite as clear. Assuming we live in a world that is connected enough that we won't completely miss important news, there isn’t a real need to be constantly scanning the feed, looking for threats.

The cycle of anxiety on Twitter use can be especially bad for women, non-binary and queer people, and people of color. "Vulnerable populations in face-to-face interactions are similarly going to be vulnerable in virtual interactions," says Aalai. These are often people who benefit greatly from Twitter because they can speak directly to the friendly audience who follows them, cutting out the potential for harassment they might receive in other places. But trolls follow, too: A 2014 Pew study shows that 25 percent of women ages 18–24 have been sexually harassed online (as opposed to 13 percent of young men), and 23 percent have been physically threatened. Fifty-one percent of African-American and 54 percent of Hispanic internet users had experienced some form of harassment online, as opposed to 34 percent of white internet users.

"You have to make a conscious decision about whether Twitter is still adding value," Rutledge says. The difficult part is that "value" is entirely subjective, and it's hard to make (good) decisions when our brain isn't working at full capacity. A recent study from the University of Chicago found that "the mere presence of one’s own smartphone reduces available cognitive capacity." And a recent New Republic article asked journalists whether they could live without Twitter. The answer was uniformly "no," although many people acknowledged that life without Twitter would be "better." It reminds me of the apostle Paul's words about sin in the letter to the Romans: "I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate."

In 1855, the poet Walt Whitman sent Ralph Waldo Emerson a copy of his newly published collection of poetry, Leaves of Grass. "I find it the most extraordinary piece of wit and wisdom that America has yet contributed," Emerson wrote to him. "I greet you at the beginning of a great career, which yet must have had a long foreground somewhere, for such a start." Emerson saw in Whitman’s moving poetry the long and careful career of devoted practice that had gone before.

Some years later, Twitter CEO Jack Dorsey said Leaves of Grass was one of the most influential books in his career, comparing its “efficiency” to great programming. It didn’t seem to strike Dorsey as ironic that Whitman took years to craft the efficiency of language that Dorsey praised. Dorsey called Whitman a “total entrepreneur,” looking, as many of us do, for the presence of his own values in the person he admired. And that is one of the reasons people are drawn to Twitter—it gives them access to the inner lives of people they would otherwise never interact with. But in so doing, they may also start to fear that they will never become the person they want to be—never be as smart or prolific or original or beautiful as the composite of people they follow. That gap is where anxiety thrives.

In the meantime, I'm itching to know what's going on in the world. Who knows what's happened since I started writing? Is there some new political scandal? Has someone tweeted something outrageous? How am I adding up to the people I follow? I know I could wait. I could go for a walk, or read a book, or take a bath. But I think I'll check. Just one more time.

from Health News And Updates https://www.theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2017/07/how-twitter-fuels-anxiety/534021/?utm_source=feed