#also this cas lighting did not like her for some reason but eh

[cottageivy]

alysia makeover

to go with eliza's makeover i did a few months ago :)

[smol-and-grumpy]

EUPHORIA - Chapter 12

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Summary: He’s Dean Winchester, owner of a shady night club. She’s a journalist who has been asked to write an article to expose the indecency and debauchery that’s going on behind closed doors. But he’s also Dean Winchester, the boy who sat next to her in class. The boy who was too cocky for his own good.

Chapter Warning: Flangst, NSFW

WC: 4922

A/N: This chapter fills my ‘dom/sub’ square for @spnkinkbingo​​ Please share your thoughts with me, I’d love to hear your feedback.

Beta’d by @deanwanddamons​​​​​​​​​ <3

This series is more than two weeks ahead on patreon!

Series Masterlist ~ SPN Masterlist

Become a Patron ~ Buy me a coffee

Her cheeks burn up from Dean’s promise. Tugging her bottom lip between her teeth, she nods at Dean and he places a kiss on her forehead before he extends his hand for her to take, helping her down the bar stool, “Come on, I gotta say hello to some people. I wanna get this over with,”

“Okay,” She agrees, and lays her hand in his.

Dean introduces her to so many people, she can’t keep up with all their names. While he makes small talk, she scans the room.She doesn’t really know what to expect, but maybe she was hoping to see a familiar face. She spots Claire walking around, wearing a beautiful gown and carrying trays of champagne flutes. Tonight she’s really just waitressing, then.

When Dean’s finished, he guides her through the dance floor where people are mingling. Cas was standing with people she didn’t recognize. One of them she does though. It's Carmen from the boutique. 

Before she can dwell on it, someone comes around to greet Dean and they talk about things she has no clue about so she excuses herself to go to the bathroom. 

Two women come out and Y/N stands off to the side to make way for them before she gets in. She stands by the sink, checks her own reflection in the mirror. She actually didn’t have to pee, but she just needed a break. 

Washing her hands in the sink, she hears the flush of the toilet, and then the door to a stall opens to a tall beautiful woman strutting out.

Carmen.

Ugh. 

She doesn’t really want to meet her and there’s no place for her to hide or run away. She doubts that the floor will open up and swallow her, so she has to do what she thinks she should — smile and nod.

“Hey,” Carmen greets her with a wide and white smile. The woman walks forward to wash her hands in the sink next to her, and Carmen looks up, “The dress suits you. Cas was right,”

“Thank you,” Y/N answers politely, “You look good, too.”

Carmen smirks, “I know,” She tucks her hair behind her ear, “It matches the earrings Dean bought me for my birthday,” Carmen tilts her head, shows them into the mirror and their gaze meets.

Y/N’s heart thumps in her chest. She feels like throwing up but she keeps herself together. She smiles but she doesn’t know how convincing it looks, “They look lovely,”

“Thanks,” The other woman dries off her hands and walks out, leaving Y/N standing there perplexed. 

She locks herself into a stall and sits on the closed lid, trying to calm herself down. There’s really no reason for her to have all these feelings. She’s being very unreasonable, and she knows it. It’s just— she can’t fucking help it. 

After a long while, she gathers herself together enough to face the crowd again. She walks out onto the dance floor, and sees Dean talking to Carmen. The woman has her hand on his arm, laughs at a joke he probably told her.

Dean’s eyes are on her when he notices her walking out onto the dance floor. He pulls his arm away from Carmen’s hand, walks towards her to meet her. 

There’s a frown on his face and she knows that it’s maybe because she looks like she does not want to be here anymore, “You okay?”

“Fine,” She answers short and she looks at Carmen who has a smug grin on her face. 

He bends down a little, whispering in her ear, “Seriously, what is it?”

“Uh,” She starts to say, doesn’t really know why it matters, “I got this dress from the boutique Cas took me to. Carmen was there and she was visibly upset that you weren’t the one with Cas. I just met her in the bathroom, is all.” 

Y/N sees him looking back to Carmen, notices Carmen smiling and waving at Dean. Clearly not at her.

Dean presses his lips into a thin line but he’s grinning, while he raises one eyebrow, “Yeah, she’s our seamstress. We always go to her if we need new clothes for employees,” He explains, and then he adds, “Are you jealous by any chance?”

Is she jealous? Well, she doesn’t know? It’s just, Carmen was clearly expecting Dean and she looked so upset which makes Y/N think that maybe Dean had something going on with her? And why did the woman have to rub the gift in her face?

“She told me that you bought her the earrings that match her dress,”

Dean’s eyes widen before he starts to laugh, “Honestly, she gets presents from us every year. Cas usually organizes it. I have no idea what she got.”

Oh.

He pushes his thumb and forefinger underneath her chin, tilts her head up and bends down to kiss her lips, “You’re jealous,”

“Nah,” She says, shaking her head.

He’s laughing as he kisses her again, “You’re cute.”

“She’s wearing the dress she wanted me to wear at first.”

Dean takes another glance over and he has to grin, “Well, I’m glad you didn’t. You look much better in this dress.”

“She looks good too, though,” She says, because it’s true. Carmen accentuated her cleavage perfectly. Her legs are long and to die for. They are wearing the same colored dress, which should be weird but she doesn’t really mind about these things anyway. It’s just seeing the dress on Carmen, she thinks that maybe she should have shown some more cleavage as well? Maybe Dean does really like that? Her dress is very modest, compared to Carmen’s.

“Eh,” Dean’s arm sneaks around her waist. His hand drops lower, squeezes at her ass cheek and she looks around perplexed, hoping nobody notices, “I prefer you like this, don’t need people to see what’s mine,” 

  To Dean, the evening feels like it’s dragging on. He’s anticipating the moment that he’s going to be able to slip out and take her upstairs. 

She’s cute when she’s jealous, though. He never thought she would be, and now that she is, it makes him kind of proud. Maybe he’s not the only one who feels the things he feels after all? Maybe she just needs more time to realize it.

However, she really doesn’t have to worry about Carmen. It’s true that he once took her out but that was before he even opened up the club. Since then, he kept their relationship strictly business, but he can’t deny that he knows Carmen wants more. And he’s sure that she can get more. Sure that Carmen deserves someone who pays her attention and cultivates her hunger for fame and status. It’s just… that someone is definitely and absolutely not him.

They are sitting together on the couch and Dean has an arm draped around Y/N’s shoulder. She leans into him, and they face the dance floor. Occasionally, Dean would whisper to her, would tell her about the guests secrets that he knows of. They would laugh and joke around and it seems easy. Cas is doing the majority of the work anyway, like they agreed to in the beginning of their arrangement. 

After a short while of silent people watching, Dean leans closer to her and nuzzles his nose against her temple, “Hey, you ready?”

And he likes that, likes how she looks back at him with knowing eyes. Likes the smile on her face and then she nods, her cheeks seem to pick up color. 

Dean doesn’t say anything, grins a little but other than that, he tries to keep his cool and fishes out his phone to text Cas. He quickly places his phone back and stands up, jerks his head to the back door, to let her know where he’s going. He goes first, waits by the door until she joins him.

They take the staircase up to the VIP part of the club, their heels echoing off the walls. 

All the lights above the rooms are red, as they should be because it signals that they’re not to be used tonight.

“Okay, what do you feel like?” Dean asks her but instead of answering, she tugs her lips between her teeth. Fucking cutest little thing, really. How can she even think that he would have eyes for someone else?

He decides to take the lead and takes her to the nearest door that he’s sure she hasn’t been in yet. 

The room opens to a setting of a dirty bathroom with holes in the walls of the stalls and everything. 

“Ewww,” Her nose wrinkles and Dean has to chuckle, “This is really someone's fantasy?”

“Oh, sweetheart, more than you think.” Dean tugs at her arm, pulling her out, knowing that this is not what she wants. To be fair, it’s also not really on his list either, it doesn’t even make his list. 

She walks ahead and takes a couple of steps to the next room. Dean decides to let her open them up herself, “Go on, you can take a look at every room you like.”

Y/N smiles, her hand reaches out to turn the knob on the door. Dean knows not to go closer because he knows what’s in there. She closes it immediately, her eyes wide before her face settles on a grimace. Dean has to keep himself from laughing too loud. 

“Before you ask, yes. That is something people pay for.”

“Tentacles? Really?” She hisses in disgust. 

“Go on, try another one. We’re not going anywhere until we find something you like.”

She chuckles, “It’s like playing the lottery here.”

He watches her walk to another room and she lets out a “Oh,” in surprise as soon as she has the door open.

Dean walks up beside her, “I mean, it really looks inviting but I wouldn’t go anywhere near that water.”

He means the hot tub in the middle of the room. Off to the wall is a steam room as well. Even though the room gets a major clean and the water is exchanged every day, still Dean doesn’t trust it. 

“Yeah, no. Not that I want to.” Y/N says, her nose wrinkling. Another thing that he thinks is awfully cute. 

They walk along the hallway and she’s playing eeny, meeny, miny, moe until she comes to a halt. She turns the door knob and opens up to a dark room. 

There’s minimal lighting. The ones in the corners glowing red. 

There’s a black leather examination table in the middle. There’s also a big bed off to the side. The table and the bed are both equipped with restraining cuffs on their ends. She goes in and Dean watches her opening up the closet next to the door. There’s a lot of sex toys on the hangers and a mini fridge which Dean knows contains ice. He closes the door behind him, sensing that she wants to stay. 

He watches her toying with the retraining cuffs at the table, her fingertips gliding over the leather. 

“You want to stay or try another door?” He asks just to be on the safe side, and follows her further into the room. 

Y/N takes her time in answering him, looks around like she’s deep in thought. After a while, she turns, and there’s a weak smile on her face, “You’ve never done anything in those rooms?” 

“No,” It comes out instantly, he doesn’t even need to think about it.

She nods, “You said in the beginning that I’m allowed to try everything in the rooms, right?”

Dean swallows. He can guess where she wants to go with it, “Correct,”

Her fingers trail along the leather of the table and she looks down, watching the path of her finger. 

After a while she starts to talk but she doesn’t look up at him, “So,” She says. 

He has to bite back a grin. 

“Would it be weird if you try it with me?” She finally says and squints her eyes close.

Dean acts surprised but he can’t hide the smirk on his face. She asks him if it’s okay for him to try something with her. It’s like she doesn’t know him at all. Which, to be fair, she probably doesn’t — yet. Of course he would like to try things with her. Of fucking course he wants to see her limits. He wants to know every fucking inch of her body, wants to know what makes her shiver and tremble. He wants her. Period.

“Would you want me to?” He asks instead and tries to show his best poker face.

She looks up, her eyes find his, and she smiles, bright and wide, “Yes.” 

Quickly, he strides over to her, picks her up to sit her on the table before he crashes his mouth on hers. It feels like fireworks, Dean thinks. He feels little sparks exploding inside of him, his heart is beating faster, his kisses grow hungrier. God, he’s been hard thinking about doing things to her since she woke up in his bed this morning. And it’s hard, so hard not to suffocate her with all the want he has in him.

Their tongues slide together and her taste intoxicates his brain. Her hands work on his suit jacket, shrugging it off for him before her hands work on the button of his dress shirt. His hands are in her hair, around her neck, on her back. Fingertips pressing into her flesh, drawing her closer, even though they are close already but it’s not enough for him. It’s never enough. 

His hands find the zipper of her dress, pulling it down but it gets stuck. Dean doesn’t care, tears the fabric from her body and she yelps into his mouth. He breaks the kiss to chuckle, “It was in the way,” 

Y/N frowns, but Dean quickly kisses her again, making her forget as he pulls his shirt out of his pants to drop it onto the floor. 

Dean steps back to let her get out of her torn dress and she’s only wearing a pair of fucking string panties that might as well not be there. She however skipped the bra and Dean thinks it’s good because he doesn’t know if he would have the patience to get her out of it without ripping it off. He hooks his hand into her panties, pulling them down and lowers himself to place a kiss on her clit. She moans and even though Dean only wanted to place a quick kiss there, he couldn’t help himself. Couldn’t hold his own tongue back from licking at her folds, eager for a taste. Her hand finds his head, pulling him closer and Dean chuckles against her wet cunt. He pushes himself up after a while because they need to get on with what he has in mind.

“Hop back onto the table and lie on your back,” Dean says, his voice a little strained, can’t help it. It needs everything in him not to just whip out his dick and pound into her senseless.

Dean turns his back on her and walks over to the closet. His hands work swiftly, rummaging through the things and finding the item he needs. 

“Look at this,” He holds up a harness, “It goes around your neck down to your thighs, holding them up and spread. Is that okay?”

“Yes,” Her voice is broken but it’s there. Dean grins, leans down to kiss her. His hand grabs her tit, kneads it and lets go of it with a pull of her nipple. She arches her back and whimpers softly.

“Good girl,” He praises, “Move up close to the edge with your head,” 

She does, moves up on the table until her head’s almost hanging off the edge. Dean secures the harness on the back of her neck and it goes around her shoulders down to her thighs. He puts the cuffs below her knees, so they would be pulled up when he tightens the harness.

He takes a step back to admire his work, and fuck, he’s so fucking hard at the sight of her all spread out, pussy wet and shining. 

Dean bends down, kisses her forehead, lingers there with his lips, “I don’t want to do anything you don’t want, okay? So, I want to make sure that you still know what to say,”

“Tomato,” The word jumps out of her mouth like a bullet.

Grinning, he pecks her forehead, “Good girl,” He stands up a little straighter, “Do you trust me, Y/N?”

Her eyes are dark, lids heavy. She nods but remembers instantly that she has to give a verbal answer, “Yes, I trust you, Dean.”

His heart takes a leap and he smirks with a nod. Standing up straight, Dean walks to where her head almost hangs off the table and positions himself there. His hands picking her up, one of his arms weaving through both her arms on her back, locking her in place. He nibbles and licks at her face, his free hand roams around her body, feeling her muscle flex, his hand rough on her delicate skin. 

Dean works his hand lower, alternates between both of her beautiful tits, fingers twerking her nipples, pulling at them, making her moan next to his face and he moves his face on hers until he captures her lips with his, kisses her rough and deep. 

His hands go even lower, until he cups her pussy in his palm, making her gasps into his open mouth. Dean sinks his teeth into her bottom lip, tugs at it before parting from her. His thick fingers threads through her slick folds.

“Jesus, look at you, you’re soaked, baby,” He kisses her temple as his fingers rub against her clit. She squirms and writhes and he tightens his hold on her. Dean slides a finger into her pussy, “God, you’re so tight,” His finger moves in and out and she lets out the cutest of sounds, “Can you take another finger, huh?”

Y/N nods almost frantically, “Uh-huh,”

“Yeah?” Dean takes his finger out and smacks her pussy twice. She yelps up, sinks her own teeth into her bottom lip to stifle her own voice, “Use your words, Y/N,”

“Y—yes,” It comes out throaty and the color rises in her face. The color traveled down to her cleavage. Dean’s sure it’s not only from the red light in the room.

“Good girl,” He whispers next to her ear, licks up the shell of it before he plunges two fingers inside of her, hooks them up just right to feel her writhe in his grip and the sound she makes goes straight to his straining cock.

He fucks his fingers into her deep and hard, rubs the pad of his fingers against her wall, hits her sweet spot that makes her want to trash around but she can’t because she’s bound. The heel of his hand rubs at her clit at the movement of his hand.

“Dean, I—” She groans, “Fuck—“

“Come, baby, come for me,” He whispers low, licks at her jawline.

Her hands wants to grab at something, because he feels her fingers scratching at his dress pants so Dean lets her go. Instead, he locks his arm around her chest and cradles her face with his hand, “Come,” He says again, and there it is, he feels her squeezing around his fingers. Her hands come up, fingers scratching at his bare arms. 

Jesus, he almost creams his own pants picturing his cock inside instead of his fingers.

“Shitshitshitfuck,” She mumbles as her whole body quivers and convulses. She comes with the arching of her back.

“That’s it,” He whispers, “Good girl, such a good girl,” He takes his fingers out of her, smacks her sensitive wet cunt and she jolts at the touch. Dean chuckles, “Taste yourself,” He trails a wet trail up her body with his fingers that’s been inside of her, and holds it to her mouth. She eagerly takes his fingers in, sucking at them, and moans around them. Dean has to bite back a growl. She’s absolutely nasty about it and it turns him on — so fucking much.

Dean sprays kisses along the side of her face and lets her down gently so she’s lying flat on her back again. He watches her chest move up and down. Her eyes are closed, she’s panting hard, trying harder to catch a breath. 

Leaning down, he places a kiss on the tip of her nose and then she opens up her eyes, she sees him and starts to laugh. He chuckles with her. 

“Now you,” She says playfully, her hands shoot up to play with his belt.

Jesus, she’s insatiable. Dean absolutely does not mind.

Her hands brush against his cock while she toys with his zipper and he jerks up a little which prompts her to giggle. He’s so jumpy around her, it’s almost embarrassing. 

Dean takes a step back and lets his pants pool around his ankle, toes off his shoes and steps out of them. Next he takes his underwear off. His dick slaps wetly against his stomach and he can see her watching him, sees that she’s trying to turn around but that’s pretty hard when she’s still bound like that. After a while she stops trying and Dean chuckles when he takes his socks off. 

He’s standing up straight again. He spits into his palm and begins to work his cock, moaning low at the relief he feels. Dean watches her licking her lips when she looks at him, her neck craning to the maximum and she sees him upside down.

Walking up to her, he bends down to kiss her. The upside down kiss feels different, it’s not bad. Not bad at all. 

“Do you want my cock, huh?” His one hand goes down her body, smacks her pussy and her whole body trembles. 

“Fuck! Yes,”

“Say it,” He smacks her pussy again. It sounds wet, she’s soaked, her juice drips down onto the leather. It’s the fucking hottest thing, “I want you to say it,”

“God,” She groans at another smack to her cunt, “I want your cock, Dean. Please?”

Chuckling, he grabs her around her shoulder, moves her down so her head is hanging off the edge of the table. 

“Good girls say please and thank you, Y/N. You’re so fucking good, ain’t you?” He says, all cocky and bravado while he grabs his dick by the base of his shaft and rubs his cock over her sinful lips. God, those lips that look so fucking good wrapped around his dick. Her tongue darts out, eager for a taste.

Jesus, she looks so goddamn beautiful when she’s so desperate for his dick.

“Open up your pretty mouth for me, baby,” Dean coos. His hand is around the base of his shaft, applying pressure so as not to fucking come all over her face by just the sight of what lays before him. 

“Stick your tongue out,” He commands, and taps his dick on her tongue as soon as she does. She’s moaning below him at the feel of his heavy dick on the tip of her tongue. 

Dean slides it up and down her tongue, “You won’t be able to say the word but if you want me to stop, at any time, tap out, okay? Tap on my thighs, my stomach, tap on the table, just tap.” 

“Yes,” She swallows the drool accumulated in her mouth and Dean grins. 

“‘K,” He manages to say before sliding the tip into her open mouth and she immediately seals her lips around his girth, making him groan out loudly. 

It’s wet and hot and it feels so fucking right. Dean’s heart is beating heavily in his chest, his cock twitches inside of her mouth. 

“I’ll go in further, okay?” He’s almost out of breath already, has to fucking compose himself. 

Y/N can’t really answer with his dick in her mouth, he knows that, he just wants her to know what he’s doing and she knows that she can tap out anytime so he dares it. Dares to go in deeper. The angle with her head upside down is right for both of them, her throat opens up to him more easily.

His hands are now on both her tits, squeezing and kneading as he starts to thrust his hips into her awaiting mouth, going in half an inch, out a quarter, deeper and deeper until he feels resistant. He stays there for a fraction of a second longer, has to groan out at the tight squeeze before he pulls his dick out and she gasps for air, a string of her thick spit connects the tip of his cock to her lips. He rubs the slick around his dick, jerks himself while he gives her time to recover.

He lets her cough and catch a breath before he asks, “You okay to continue?” 

She blinks her tears away, nodding with enthusiasm, “Yes, please,” 

Dean chuckles. Such a fucking good girl indeed.

Sliding in again, he can feel that she slowly gets used to it. Used to his cock hitting the back of her throat and she still can’t take it too deep, because he knows that it could go deeper, but that’s not the point of all this. It’s perfect the way it is and Dean wouldn’t want to have it any other way.

He leans forward, plays with her sensitive clit while he thrusts his hips a little faster and she squirms, moaning while his cock fucks into her mouth. The vibrations on her tonsils tickles him and Dean smacks down on her clit, making her shriek as he pulls his hips back and his dick out again. 

Y/N begins to licks at his balls, swirling her tongue around it and sucks like she fucking means it. It’s a hard tug, the right side of painful, something that makes him want more, while Dean plunges two fingers into her soaking cunt, fucks her deep and hard with it, his other hand plays with her sensitive clit. And sure enough, she’s coming around his fingers again while she has one of his balls sucked in her mouth.

“Christ, you’re so fucking perfect,” He coos and works his own fist around the tip of his dick, waiting for her to be ready again. 

When Dean slides in the next time, he concentrates on the image of the bulge that’s forming on her throat. He goes in deeper, sees it bulging some more and he lays his hand on it, feeling his own dick and goddamnit, he’s so close. 

Pulling out abruptly, he releases the strap on her thighs and yanks the harness off of her. Dean pulls her up into a sitting position and jerks her forward so her ass balances on the edge of the table. He positions his dick to her entrance and slides home in one smooth motion.

They both groan in unison, her hands are on his shoulder and arm, holding herself up while he has one hand pulling at her hair making her expose her throat to him before he sucks and licks at her skin. 

He soon let's go, places his hand steady at the back of her neck. His other hand thumbs at her clit, making her moan and writhe. 

“Dean,” She gasps, “I don’t know if I can come again,”

“Shhhh,” He claims her mouth, kissing her as hard as he fucks her, tasting himself on her, “You can do it, baby, come for me,”

“Oh god,” She moans, lets go off him and braces her hand on the table and leans back a little. He quickly kisses her, fucking her with wild abandon and then he feels it, feels her pussy constricting around his cock, feels her gushing and it’s getting wetter. 

He leaves his forehead on hers while she has her eyes closed and as she squirms, her face twists in beautiful agony. 

“Fuck,” Y/N breathes out when the moment passes and Dean chuckles, kisses her gentle, soft. A wild contrast to how he fucks her. 

“Love it when you come on my cock,” He whispers. His voice is broken, he knows. 

She’s still so tight around him, and he still rubs at her clit. She’s already getting tired, he feels it, knows that he has to hurry but that’s not really a challenge because fuck, if he’s going explode any second now. 

“Can you come again? Come with me?” He asks, leaning forward to kiss her nose, her cheek. 

“I dunno,” She says, her eyelids are heavy when she blinks. 

“You can do it, baby. Be a good girl, come with me,”

She nods, which prompts him to kiss her harder. God, he’s never going to get enough of this. 

“Come on,” Dean urges, rubs his fingers just right around her nub and he changes the angle of his thrust slightly, making his cock rub differently inside of her wall. Her thighs are trembling and she gets tighter, “Fuck, I’m—”

Y/N comes before him, and he follows suit, pushes himself inside as deep as he can go and she wraps her arms around his shoulder, nails clawing into his back as he groans into the crook of her neck. 

Chapter 13

[adiarose]

Destiel Headcanon #9

The first time they kissed, it was mutual. They moved together.

They were in Los Cruces New Mexico because a nest of vampires had been hunting around the rural areas. The victims necks were violently bitten, the area of skin they bit into was pulled off of their neck and spat beside the victim. It was...violent. There have been four victims so far. All of them are related. Two sisters named Elsie and Marissa. Their cousin Florence, and uncle Danny. A pair of fifty year old twins, Marvin and Nicholas were all that were left. They owned a horse farm by the edge of town. A greying stallion named Lee as well as a brown fowl named Dakota had been killed in warning. Torn apart in the dead of night. Police were investigating but of course didn’t know what was really happening. So Team Free Will went to check it out.

Dean and Castiel had become a couple before (a story for another time) but they were yet to kiss. This was for a couple reasons. One, as comfortable as the two had always felt around each other, the change in what they were “allowed to do” made them feel nervous. Two, Dean didn’t know exactly what Cas wanted or expected out of this relationship. A more than platonic life companion? And was he asexual? Pansexual? Bi? Gay? Dean didn’t know how far to take it or how far to not take it. The same went for Cas. From what he knew, Dean took pleasure in women. But he agreed to this relationship. It was possible that romantically he could go for both sexs, but sexually, or even for just a kiss, he favored females.

And they, the stubborn and ever awkward bastards that they were, didn’t have that discussion. So at the impasse they lay, that is until the hunter and angel found themselves fighting a losing battle against twelve vampires.

Why is it only in these moments? The ones where they come so close to death that they make one final effort to say that which was unsaid. They had slayed all the vamps. But Dean was lying down on the ground, midriff having been cut with a ten inch knife held by one of the vamps while Cas’s grace tried to replenish.

Cas had just hung up on 911 whom he had called desperate for an ambulance to help the hurt Winchester. He tossed the phone to the side, keeping a hand on Dean’s shoulder. The one that used to show the print from when he raised him from hell. He shook it, trying to keep Dean conscious.

To try and distract Dean from the pain, Cas began to speak. He talked about everything under the moon while the ambulance took the eight minute drive to the horse farm. There was some light talk such as food he had enjoyed as a human. He had a certain preference for peanut butter sandwiches, no jelly. And coffee with A LOT of creamer. He talked about the tv show friends. He had only seen the first two seasons, but he liked Phoebe the most. She liked animals and was nice.

But then Dean said his name. Drawing Cas out of that rambling haze he had been stuck in for the last six minutes and thirty-seven seconds.

“Cas...Cas. It’s okay. It's okay. I’m right here. And if you think some damn vamps with a horse fetish are gonna take me down, you’re a fool.” Cas gave a weak little smile at Dean’s attempt at humor. His attempt to make Cas happy. So they stared into each other's eyes, before eyes started to dart toward one another's lips.

Cas looked into Dean’s eyes one last time, asking for permission which was met with a little nod. And they went towards one another. Dean liked Cas’s stubble. He could feel it as he kissed him. So Dean held the side of Cas’s face to keep both of them steady.

It was...it. It was there and it was everything. Dean could definitely feel the difference between kissing a man and a woman. Cas’s hands were big against his neck and cheek. His chest was flat. And of course that damned stubble. But there was also the fact that it was Cas.

Cas’s history with relationships was far more limited. There was the reaper he had slept with. Eh. There was Meg whom he kissed. And he had liked her at the time. But this was Dean. And that made such a damn difference.

It wasn’t some Earth shattering moment. It was soft, and it was loving. There was just something about it that made the hunter and the angel so damned happy.

The ambulance picked Dean up. They sewed him up at the hospital while Cas dealt with the vamp bodies and called Sam to let him know that the location they were to check out, did have the vamps. But everything was okay.

Cas was allowed to see Dean pretty quickly. After all, it was just a one inch deep slash. Nothing compared to the other numerous wounds Dean had received before.

“Hey.” Dean greeted with a smile, playing with the buttons that controlled the tv.

“Hey.” Cas responded. “Are you alright?” “It's me. Of course I am okay.”

Cas looked down quickly, preparing himself with a breath before talking fast again, taking a final step towards Dean’s bedside..

“Look about what happened back at the farm. If I misread something I didn’t mean to-”

Dean silenced him with a kiss.

[bunnymcbunnister]

SPN Season 15 Spoiler Sheet, update 8/31

Waited until that second trailer came out to post. I am LIVING with all this new content! Mind the disclaimer and check it out under the cut. 

DISCLAIMER: This is gathered info from various sources. This is not confirmed information. Stuff in this WILL be wrong. Don’t take this too seriously. This is for fun. Also, if you use this info for another publication, please let me know as a courtesy. Don’t be a dick. It's all out there, but it hurts to see my same phrasing on other publications after all the work I’ve done to consolidate it…  

General Info (oldest to newest). This is a blend of pre-COVID and post COVID, so some might change. 

They are adding a whole extra day to filming to do the final scene. They will film the final scene last.  (Implies logistics- lots of returning people?) PRE COVID SPOILER

In an interview, Kripe indicated that the series ending would have “peace” for Sam and Dean

Not much new at the TCA’s, but it was said it is “unlikely” Jeffery Dean Morgan will be back since his last appearance was such a good end note. There were some jokes about a Castiel spin off. 

There will be a special tribute ep (Post COVID talk seems to indicate this will stil happen)

Misha will be in 15 out of 20 episodes this season (he’s missed 3 so far and I suspect will miss 14 and 16, unclear about 19). 

Cas’ deal with the Empty may come up later in the season. 

Jack will be a critical part of the ending of the show

Dean and Amara’s connection will be explored

There will be a bunker themed episode (MarySue article)

In one of his cookbook interviews, Misha used the word “we” several times when talking about the final scene of Supernatural. He said that would be the last scene they shoot. It seemed to imply that he was in the scene, but that could be open to interpretation. 

JaxCon/Vegas Con spoilers: 

Misha said the ending was “happier than he expected” but also had some sadness. He later used “sad and redemptive”

Misha mentioned that Claire will be mentioned on the show, but as of yet not appear. 

Dean says the line “stop killing my people” (to god?)

Jensen said he doesn’t see how the story could continue past this season, but Jared said its more of “a see you later”

Misha confirmed he’s in the final scene, but he also indicated he had one week of filming left (total?) PRE COVID SPOILER

Al Cal posted a pic of a “thrown away” call sheet that seem to indicate Micheal, Lucifer, and a character named “Betty” interacting in the bunker. Unclear as to the validity. 

There will be a flashback episode

Charlie (original flavor) will return

Filming will resume on Aug 18th. Per Canadian policy, they must quarantine for two weeks. Those quarantining seems to include:

Fairly Clear: Jared, Jensen, Jake Abel (Micheal), Rob Benedict (Chuck/God) Mark Pelligrino (Lucifer), Al Cal (didn't need to quarantine, but he is definitely on set)

Unclear/Rumored: Misha (he is being deliberately cagey), Osric Chau (Kevin- but likely for another project, he was a week ahead of everyone else) Jim Beaver (Bobby) flew to Vancouver on 8/26, so he could make it for the last couple days of filming with a quarantine 

No idea: Shoshannah Stern and Ruth 

Reasons Unlikely: Sam Smith (chemo treatment), Kim Rhodes (working at a camp during quarantine)

Jensen said sp 19 is more of a season finale, while 20 is a series finale. Repeated in interviews/livestreams. 

Megan Fitz. complimented both Dabb’s and Glynn’s writing on twitter. Not sure if it is in reference to rewrites or the special retrospective that is planned. 

Jensen indicated that the ending did change per COVID protocols. Unclear how much.

Misha is being very, very cagey about where he is. Some live streams seem to indicate he is not at home, but he has yet to confirm- his presence in 19/20 is hard to track. In an interview with Metaverse, he was in bed in a hotel looking space and you could see mountains in the background. He was not on set for the first week of filming, so he could be a week behind. 

Misha has thrown around the words “final”  and “what he <Misha> would have wanted” per Cas’ ending. “Sad/Proud” and “poignant” were also used. 

The final episodes will premier October 8th. The finale will air Nov 19th in conjunction with an hour long special. 

A trailer was released on 8/27. Scenes included:

A moving speech from Sam to Dean

(Possibly from 18) A teary conversation between Dean and Cas

Injured Dean being helped by Cas in the bunker

Jack breaking some cuffs/bring thrown into a wall/saying he has to kill god

Dean and his grenade launcher and a purple nightgown 

Sam in a sweater vest getting a gun from under a pillow

A glimpse of a body with “Lust” written above it/a matronly woman (I think the villain from 14) saying “Boys”

Ghost Dean? Little Sam cutting off a hand

Some intermixed scenes from past episodes

A second trailer was released on 8/31. Scenes included:

A monologue from Billie about god coming to destroy the planet plus her banging on a bunker door (with her hand all gooey) and striking someone with her sythe

Jack continuing his speech about killing god but expanding that he has a ritual to do

Lots of red danger lights in the bunker/ 3 people getting tossed around in the bunker/Chuck in the bunker

Chuck saying he doesn't believe Sam and Dean can kill him

Young Sam and not ghost Young dean

Dean angrily driving the Impala then saying “its time”

Cas drawing his blade in front of an old truck to protect someone in a suit (Jack? I cant tell)

More Dean tears

A surprise appearance from Bobby

Some of the same scenes as before

Episode 15x14

Title: Last Holiday

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: MAKING UP FOR LOST TIME – Sam (Jared Padalecki) and Dean (Jensen Ackles) discover a wood nymph (guest star Meagan Fey) living in the bunker who is determined to protect her family, at any cost. Eduardo Sanchez directed the episode written by Jeremy Adams (#1514). Original airdate 3/30/2020.

Written by: Jeremy Adams

Director: Eduardo Sanchez

Filming Dates:1/15- 1/24

Airdate: unknown- October 8th

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? eh… I don't think so Jack ? yes

Guest stars: 

Other Spoilers/info:

Misha mentioned being at an airport the first day of filming, maybe he’ll miss this one

The director shared a BTS shot with AlCal’s chair in the background. He also posted on that looked like the statues in hell. Lots of filming at the bunker. A few impala shots were shared as well. 

In an EW article, a mysterious woman gives Sam and Dean every holiday they ever missed. Based on the title, I’m guessing this!

 Episode 15x15

Title: Gimme Shelter

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: 

Written by: ?? Davy Perez???? They seem to be keeping it under wraps for some reason

Director: Matt Cohen

Filming Dates: 1/27-2/5

Airdate: unknown. October 15th?

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ?yes  Jack ? Yes

Guest stars: 

Other Spoilers/info:

There was some filming done at the crossroads with only Misha. 

Alex and Misha filmed together

It seems as if J2 didn’t film at all the first week, Misha filmed six or seven days, this is a Cas centric ep

Episode 15x16

Title: Drag Me Away (From You)

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: 

Written by: Megan Fitzmartin

Director: Amyn Kaderali

Filming Dates: 2/6-2/17

Airdate: October 22nd?

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? I think so… briefly? Jack ? not sure either. 

Guest stars: IMDB credits Lisa Berry (Billie/Death)

Other Spoilers/info:

Alex got a cast of his face around the filming of this- so this ep or the one after

Looks like we get Dean in a robe!

They filmed at Rooster’s Sunrise Hotel for 3 days/nights

This might be the flashback ep

Episode 15x17

Title: Unity

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: 

Written by: Meredith Gylnn

Director: Catrion McKenzie

Filming Dates: 2/19-2/28

Airdate: Oct 29th?

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? yes Jack ? yes

Guest stars: Rob benedict and Emily Sparrow

Other Spoilers/info:

Chuck and Amara trailers were seen on set when filming in a garden

Jensen was in NOLA Friday, possible Monday

“Uriel” was around for filming (Post COVID update: Misha seemed to indicate that this was because the actor was nearby filming? Not sure if this is to cover up the spoiler or the truth)

Alex and Jensen filmed in the imala

Episode 15x18

Title: The Truth

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: 

Written by: BOBO

Director: Speight

Filming Dates: 3/2--3/11

Airdate: Nov 5th?

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? yes Jack ? yes

Guest stars: 

Other Spoilers/info:

Misha and Alex filmed near the impala. J2 showed up later that night. This was the source of the “last time they all filmed on set” photo)

An really emotional scene was filmed with Misha and Jensen. Jared was definitely not there, but Alex was on the flight they took with Rich, so its possible he was too. This was revealed at a con in which the four of them were on a plane that had an in-flight problem.

Filming watchers saw a bro hug

Tape Ball posted a shot of field that looks like were dean came back from hell

Misha indicated this was his “favorite episode” in a recent interview

Episode 15x19

Title: Inherit the Earth

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: 

Written by: bucklelimg

Director: John Showalter

Filming Dates:: 3/12-3/23/cancelled for COVID and then 8/18-8/27

Airdate: Nov 12th

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? unknown Jack ? yes

Guest stars: Jake Abel (Micheal), Mark Pelligrino (Lucifer) 

Other Spoilers/info:

Production shut down as a precaution for coronavirus on 3/13, two days into filming. It is scheduled to start again on Aug 18th. 

Jensen indicated there might be some re-writes for this ep to account for COVID protocols.

When they started filming, they indicated they were on day two. So maybe they could only use some of the scenes they shot? Then they added an extra day all called it day 9. COVID protocols makes things take longer 

AlCal was definitely on set. 

Jake Abel is definitely on set, and he posted an instagram story with his trailer and Lucifer’s (Mark Pelligrino)

Some filming was done at a gas station called Showalter’s (name of the director) with Jared, Jensen, and Alex

Jake “Spoiler King” Abel filmed a video showing chairs for Jared, Jensen, and Alex as well as Rob Benedict (Chuck/God). They were filming near a lake with a mountain view (that looked similar to where Cas died in season 13)

Rob Benedict posted it was his last day in Vancouver, indicating we won't see Chuck past this episode? Or very very briefly in 20? Jake Abel posted a similar message, also baiting fans about Misha’s whereabouts 

 Episode 15x20

Title: Carry On

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: 

Written by: Dabb

Director: Bob Singer

Filming Dates: 8/28- 911? (9/7 is Labor Day, not sure if that affect filming in Canada, or if the finale still requires an extra day. COVID makes things take longer as well)

Airdate: November 19th

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? maaaaybe? Jack ? maaaaybe?

Guest stars: 

Other Spoilers/info:

Misha is in the final scene, per pre COVID interviews. 

Jake Abel used a “we” when he tweeted about getting back to work as soon as the virus scare ended, indicating Adam/Micheal would be part of the finale. He is quarantining, so this seems likely. Now looking like he was referencing 19.

Jensen indicated filming would take two weeks, longer than usual

[songbirdmusicnc]

Do You HAVE to Sing?!?

My "baby" brother (now in his 30's) used to get so annoyed at my singing around the house. There he'd be, minding his own business, playing Madden on his Sega Genesis (dating myself!!!), and then suddenly out of nowhere, I'd come bellowing out of my room singing some huge opera aria just as loudly and dramatically as I could. It drove him NUTS!! He used to say in total agony, "MUST YOU SING!?!??!" Of course I'd look at him out the corner of my eye and grin with that little mischievous smile that so many kids have when they just know they were up to no good. 😏 

Well, the truth is, yes--I must sing. I had to then, and I still have to until this day. "HAVE" to!?!? Yes. Have to. Have to, and wantto...forever. 

When I was growing up in the public housing system of San Francisco, CA, there was nothing outside of our apartment that you could call inviting. We were in a poor neighborhood, steeped in drug addiction, all sorts of crime, violence and despair. Most families that lived on our housing complex did the best they could with what they had. While many of them were elderly, a good number of them were families of a decent size, all the way up to ten in one apartment. That would have been us, the Buchanan's. 

I'm the seventh of nine children. My parents are both from Kansas. My father having also spent some of his childhood in Arkansas and Missouri, they were both mid-westerners with no grid at all for big-city life. A long story more suitable for another time would reveal that eventually, after five children, the seven of them up and moved to San Francisco in 1972, starting a new life in an urban area that was not only unfamiliar to them, but in some ways downright scary. But, they lived there for many years and I came on the scene in 19...eh-ehmm... Never mind those details. But, from the time I was three months old until I was 23 we lived in those housing projects. And in all the darkness and trouble that the neighborhood brought, I was given one gift from above that would change my course: a voice.

Singing has always been to me something to be associated with God. Through singing and studying music starting as early as 9 years old, I was (from my perspective now that I'm older) rescued from a dead-end journey to nowhere and exposed to some of the most incredible talent you can find worldwide, hands-down. All because God gave me a voice. Singing songs and engaging in competitions and taking classes and learning instruments and learning how to conduct an orchestra at age 11--all these things pulled me out of the destitute surroundings I lived in and exposed me...well it exposed me to the world. There I was, only 14 years old, singing in Italian, Latin, French, German; later adding Ukrainian, Russian, Hebrew and Spanish. No one in my neighborhood was doing this; I can safely say this, knowing that my involvement in this kind of music sort of made me....a little peculiar to the other kids, to say the least. :) I still remember being nine years old, singing in the church choir of about forty elderly men and women whose repertoire consisted of age-old Negro Spirituals and baroque-like oratorios. Why? Because my voice was too big for the children's choir, and none of the teenagers wanted me in their youth choir belting out opera tones when they're trying to rock, clap and shout to the latest Gospel tunes of the day. So, there I was sandwiched between more silver-, blue-, and purple-gray hair than you can dream of, occasionally being slipped a peppermint candy by one of the grandmas who felt sorry for me falling asleep at our late Tuesday-night rehearsals. The voice I had was unique and it opened some doors, while closing others.

All of this had meaning, though. There was a reason for my experiencing such things. Firstly, I realize that it kept me from the nearly inevitable fall into the dangerous and hopeless street life that plagued so many young people in my neighborhood. Secondly and most importantly to me, God made me a shining light for many people who were incredibly wealthy, and therefore practically altogether unreached. I opened my mouth to sing, and the tears would flow. Nothing I was doing; God was singing through me, loving on folks, and those precious people who needed the love of God just as much as anyone else, got to feel His presence in a way that deeply moved them. I clearly remember how in some cases what they felt reminded them of their upbringing in the Church--leaving them with an unshakable sense that they needed to somehow connect with their spiritual heritage again. This is priceless stuff right here.

So, to answer baby brother's question, YES! I MUST SING! And the reason for Songbird Music LLC's existence is not to somehow pump up my own ego or magnify my own ability; heavens no. Since its inception in 2003, while I still lived in California, I was looking for singers who felt they had a personal responsibility to preserve, protect and enhance their instruments for the longterm--never damaging it, always learning to work with it and keep it healthy for decades ahead. I'm still on that journey; I feel there are so many out there who love what God gave them, but need help keeping it.

My homepage has Psalm 104:33 in its header, which reads: "I will sing to the Lord as long as I live; I will sing praise to my God while I have my being." I want this to be the hallmark for every student of mine: that they sing to the glory of God, and they do it well....forever.

-Sharine Buchanan Owner, Songbird Music LLC

Sharine Buchanan is the Owner of Songbird Music LLC. She earned her Bachelor's of Arts degree in Music with High Honors from the University of California at Berkeley, and her Masters of Music degree with an emphasis in Vocal Performance from the San Francisco Conservatory of Music (valedictorian). She lives in North Carolina's Wilkes County, the foothill of the Brushy Mountains, where she relocated in 2013 to join an international ministry, faithfully serving her pastors in music and various aspects of their ministry. To inquire about studying voice with Sharine, email her at teachme@songbirdmusicnc.com, or call 510-220-4077.

Check it Out! “O Del Mio Dolce Ardor” by Gluck

https://youtu.be/CSb0E_X6DA4

[anika-ann]

Errare Humanum Est - Pt.12

Alice in Wonderland

Type: series, soulmate AU series  (part 1, part 2)   x Supernatural

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader (past?)    Word count: 3500

Summary: The cat’s outta bag and ‘Nat’ really isn’t sure she likes it. Perhaps she prefered it the other way around. There’s a lot more emotions in the air now.

Warnings: mentions of violence, blood and death, amnesia, swearing, bit of a metafiction, mentions of tumblr-like sites ;) ...and possibly messed up format

Story masterlist

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Sam and Dean seemed more than a bit dumb-struck when you finally emerged from the bathroom, which had you shift uncomfortably. Now they were looking at you like the rest of the café and wasn’t that just perfect. You were regretting choosing to dress like the Winchesters now; maybe that was why people here kept staring at you. Except it didn’t explain why Dean and Sam were staring too all of sudden.

Despite their expressions, Sam shook his head as if snapping from some kind of daze, his eyes again displaying concern for your well-being, asking about it. To be fair, it was a very valid question.

“Hey. You okay?”

No. “Yeah. Just… dunno. The staring doesn’t make me feel good,” you muttered, taking the seat next to Sam.

It was only partly the truth. While you didn’t have any solid lead on your soulmate, being here, possibly closer to him… it made you as excited as nervous. Restless, definitely.

“Well, it helped a lot,” Sam announced, sounding almost cheery. It got you shift your gaze to stare at him, your expression no doubt as puzzled as you felt at such statement. Huh?  Sam smiled softly. ”We might have found your soulmate.”

“Really?!” you yelped, quickly covering your mouth when you realized how loud your voice went. But frankly, you didn’t care much about that. Because… WHAT?! When? How? “How is that possible?”

Sam’s gaze travelled to the counter, where the orange-haired girl who had welcomed your trio was smiling your direction subtly. You lowered your eyes, your mind racing. What did that woman had to do with it? Had you known her? From… before? Did she know your soulmate?

“Yeah. He’s Captain America,” Dean dropped the bombshell bluntly.

You saw clearly that they expected you to have a flash of recognition in your eyes at least, but it wouldn’t come. You had no clue what they were talking about. Was that some kind of a… special army rank? Or… a stage name for an artist or something?

God, you hoped it wasn’t a stripper’s name.

That idea made blood rush into your cheeks, only a dumbfounded noise leaving your mouth.

“Huh?”

“Right,” Sam cleared his throat, shifting in his seat. It took your eyes from slightly disappointed Dean.

“He’s a superhero-“

What.

“-he kinda is around hundred now-“

WHAT. ‘Kinda?’ What did that even mean?

“-so that would explain the… peculiar soulmark you have. But don’t worry, he doesn’t look hundred, he isn’t really, it’s complicated…”

Nope, still not following.

A superhero? your mind echoed again, not even the tiniest bit helpful. Kinda hundred, but not really…?

“Anyway, even the way you were when Cas brought you in? It all checks out with the story. Even the last name you picked. His name is Steve Rogers,” Sam added, his voice dropping in both volume and tempo, seeing your brain momentarily fried.

You stared blankly ahead, trying to process all the new information you were given, letting it merge with what you had already knew – which wasn’t much. Sweet ‘doll’ caressed your ears, Dean’s joke about time-travel and a mafioso kind of soulmate, about Rowena talking the strong bound with the man you had met but hadn’t met.

You didn’t realize you had closed your eyes and how long you had remained quiet until a warm hand landed on your shoulder, Sam’s voice calling out your given name.

That was funny, wasn’t it? You chose Natasha, not knowing why. But you also chose Rogers – because clearly, that was your soulmate’s name. A soulmate who was sort of hundred years old and a superhero.

You blinked your eyes opened, still unable to let the supposed facts sink in.

“Nat? You okay there?” Dean joined his brother in mother-henning you and you couldn’t help but try and charm a slight smile on your lips at their care.

Sam gently squeezed your shoulder to ground you.

“I… I guess. It’s just…I-- … a lot. This is a lot. I’m… I’m not sure I get it,” you stuttered finally. Judging by their expressions, they didn’t trust you that you were okay, but didn’t push you. It was a lot to process. How was such thing even possible? “You really need to explain further. What even made you think I’m some… superhero’s soulmate?”

“We will explain it all,” Sam promised, removing his hand only to motion toward the latté and cake on the table. Why was here a cake? And why only one? Was this about Dean making you eat more again? You didn’t even need an answer. “But first, eat. Then we might have a trip.”

You honest to god would have raised the tea spoon to start eating, but his Sam’s later words had you frozen in mid-motion. A trip?

“To where? To find this… Steve Rogers? You know where he lives?” you blurted out, shocked. The sinking feeling in your stomach, the nerves working, nudged you intently.

“Yeah. Kinda. Though maybe we could stop by in a church first.”

You frowned at Dean, your confusion spiking. Was there anything at all that actually made a freaking sense?!

“A church? Why?”

“To light a candle for you,” Dean hummed, almost indifferent as if he was talking about weather and not about visiting your grave or whatever.

“…what?” you squeaked, earning an eye-roll.

“Just eat, Nat.”

Right. They probably knew your actual name now. That was why Dean made the point of… articulating it so pointedly.

Upon that, you dug into the cake obediently. Something told you that you’d need that sugar rush.

༻༺༻༺༻ღ༺༻༺༻༺

It was a good thing that Dean had forced you to eat first; if you had been eating when being shown the pictures of Steve Rogers, you would have choke to death and that would be embarrassing. Not to mention ironic.

Sam was introducing the man known as Captain America in a hushed voice, clearly not wanting to attract attention. He explained that the man was the Second World War hero (what?) and how he had become one.

You saw a black-white picture that had been taken around 1942, showing a handsome light-haired man, maybe too skinny and short, but with a determined spark in his eye, lop-sided soft smile gracing his lips. For some reason, a warm feeling pooled around your heart – he looked adorable. A man would probably punch you if you told him he was that, but it was how you felt.

The very same year, only few days later, actually, had been taken another photo. You could tell it was the man still, but he was… bigger. Like… bigger. You weren’t sure you were buying the fact that some sort of a serum had made him like this, but… angels were a thing. So you didn’t voice your disbelief.

You did though when Sam got to the pictures of him in a ridiculous costume – and there it was, Captain America being his stage name. You were quickly explained that his performing to raise money for weapons had been a very short-lived gig. He had soon earned the rank of a Captain for real.  

You couldn’t believe your eyes when the current pictured appeared. Steve Rogers, who had apparently been trapped in ice for seventy years, still looked the same and was still saving the world.

It was too much.

It had become too much about half an hour ago.

You stared at the device in your hand, a close-up picture of the man in question on the display, the very same spark you had seen in the old picture of him pre-serum now flashing in beautiful blue eyes.

He was a special breed of a man from what you saw and heard and for some reason, Sam and Dean believed your soulmark led to him.

How?  

“That’s… you think… you think that this is my soulmate?” you whispered, voice weak, laced with uncertainty. Hell, doubt even.

How could this be?

“Yeah,” Dean shrugged, a playful smirk playing on his face as he lost the let’s-break-it-to-her-slowly attitude. “That’s what we said. What, you’re not into blonds?”

You scoffed, resisting the urge to massage your temples, suddenly bone-tired, a headache starting to build.

“That’s not… are we seeing the same pictures?”

“I sure hope so,” Sam noted, head tilted to side in confusion, begging you to elaborate even without words.

“He’s… just look at him. And he’s some kind of a hero, a superhero? Again or… still? How could a guy like him be paired with someone like me?”

Was this man even real? You weren’t sure about it. If he was, there was no way you were his soulmate. Right? That would be insane.

“I’m not even sure what that means and what to say to that,” Dean replied, his brows knitting together. You were confident he knew exactly what you meant. “Just… look, we have a video evidence-“

“I beg your pardon?!” you squealed, jumping in your seat and tossing the tablet to Sam’s hands.

“Not like that!” the taller man chimed in instantly and you gripped at your chest, your heart beating rapidly under your palm. Christ. You having certain kind of video evidence online was really the last thing you needed – or even wanted to know. “It’s from when you… died, well alright, when you were killed… it was sorta by a supervillain? He broadcasted the whole thing to every channel in US. There’s a footage of you… dying and Captain here running to your rescue. Would you- eh, would you like to see it?”

I bet you would prefer the porn kind of evidence now, a low solemn voice mocked you in your head, while your ears started ringing, your stomach making somersaults, your head pounding.

“I… I don’t know. Definitely not- not here.” And now.

Or, you know, ever.

Sam and Dean nodded in sync, expressions solemn all of sudden. They slowly rose from their seats so you followed their suit. You weren’t you sure wanted to or that your trusted your body to stand upright without passing out; however, you chose to trust the brothers to catch if your brain suddenly decided this was even more than too much and you’re sending your body vessel to the ground.

It didn’t feel like you had a choice anyway.

…

As they gathered their belongings, none of them saw their barista smile for herself and being nudged by her friend. The orange-haired girl smirked, but couldn’t keep her excitement contained. She spilled the beans about the woman; along with the fact that two days ago, she had already seen them all coming here.

That shit happened when one was a psychic after all.

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Sam and Dean decided to take a walk; more precisely, Sam had made the decision and dragged Dean away in a way that was everything but subtle. You didn’t pay any mind to that as they left you in the car with a burner phone (a gift from Dean that earned the man an appreciating look from Sam) and the tablet to go down the rabbit hole – whatever that meant. It kinda felt like it though, surfing through the net again.

First, you learned your actual name. It felt almost foreign, you had got used to Nat now, but it still had an air of it being right and you knew it was the truth.

Only then, you watched what Sam prepared for you.

The so-called video evidence caused tears to fill your eyes, soon flooding down your cheeks.

There was no faking it. There was no doubt it was you strapped to the chair. There was no doubt it was your soulmate’s voice, even when modified by the unclear record – you had heard this voice in your dreams. There was no doubt that what you heard in his words was a desperation worth losing a person he loved.

Seeing your fear and resignation-filled expression had you known that once you had felt the same about him. There was no mistaking that at least part of the fear was for him as he rushed towards the bomb instead of sprinting away to save his own skin.

A pain so sharp it made you gasp expanded in your chest, burning sensation on your skin for a fraction of second and you had to wonder if it was the last memory of your past life. Being blown up.

You had been blown up. And your soulmate witnessed it. What a twisted way to go.

What a twisted way to return, echoed in your skull and if you hadn’t been already pre-occupied with the record, you might ask heavens why you were brought back from death.

But you weren’t sure you wanted to know anyway.

To take your mind off the horrifying pictures flashing behind your eyelids, you searched the web again in attempt to find anything else.

And there was a whole new rabbit hole to find.

People indeed lighted candles for you, built altars with what you assumed was a picture of you; there were all around the United States, but mostly in New York City, near places where the explosives had been planted, where many people would have died if Captain America ran for your rescue first.

It only brought fresh tears to your eyes.

Fanfiction was a new concept to you – but what wasn’t these days. You read a few summaries, very few stories which focused on Steve after your death. It was so surreal.

Some plotlines had Steve Rogers die in the battlefield soon after losing you, often including your souls reuniting in Heaven. Those were beautiful, but also incredibly sad. Others had you resurrected somehow – which… good guess, whoever wrote that. You weren’t confident the reunion would go that smoothly though. Or, well, that passionately, as in jumping-to-bed-with-him good. All of those had a ‘fix-it’ tag. The amount of hits with those was dizzying.

Another tag that caught your eye was ‘dark!CaptainAmerica’ and dark!SteveRogers’ ; naïve, not knowing what it meant, you read summaries at least. It had your insides clench in the worst possible way, reading about the clearly good-natured man turning into a twisted stalker, sometimes even a rapist, in better cases a guy looking for a mindless fuck each night. When the element of the stalked girls looking like you joined in, you had to leave the site.

It was simply too much.

Hoping to move on, you went to click on something else entirely.

There was a website dedicated to… peculiar offers, suggestion to the hero. Basically, many people were offering to suck captain’s sorrows through his-- yeah. Sometimes, the posts were accompanied by naughty pictures and it made you ridiculously angry on both captain’s behalf and yours (not that you would ever admit it, because there was no way you were jealous, right?).

It was almost a relief to read some posts from people who had lost their soulmates too and simply were looking for a new connection. Was that how it worked? Was this what people did, drowning their sorrows together? Did it work? Was there someone who caught the captain’s eye? Or was he hoping to meet his soulmate, having a new set of marks like she – possibly you – did? He must have, right?

You shook your head and sighed, absentmindedly going through some comments on what was called Tumblr. A long post with many reactions caught your attention and you had decided to read it, rather not trying to figure out what exactly possessed you to do so when many things seen today had already made you sick from your stomach.

He used to come to our coffee shop sometimes. I was trying to woman up and flirt with him for weeks. Never got to it and now I’m kinda glad. One day, he didn’t order and just sat there, clearly waiting for someone – and looked super-impatient, I swear he was tapping his foot. I didn’t call him out on it despite how annoying it was. I couldn’t even tell him to order or get out – try to say that to a national icon! And then… then she came in. You know, I read a lot of chickflics, not gonna lie. But for the first time, I actually saw someone looking at another person as if ‘they hung the moon’. Seriously. He had hearts in his eyes. I would wish everyone to find themself a better half that looks at them like that. She wasn’t any different, but that’s implied – she was dating a gorgeous man and a hero on top of that. They were so obviously in love and while they were polite all the way – that woman was super-nice, alright, – it was clear the rest of the world disappeared when they were together. Just wanna say: stick your disgusting offers to cure his heart by sucking his D to your arse. That man is mourning the woman he clearly loved with his whole heart and he has every right. I want to thank him for the lives he saved. I want to thank her for not spending their last moments yelling accusation to his face to make him feel guiltier than he already had, no doubt. I hope her soul is in a good place and one day, they will reunite. Rest in peace, sweetie. I hope you get see the way he was looking at you every day.

→  Amen, sister.

→ That’s equally heart-warming and heart-breaking. Poor girl. Poor guy.

→ Has anyone actually seen him outside since it happened? I hope he’s handling it. As much as a person can.

→ So what? You think he should just be alone for the rest of his live? Grow up, girl. Guy needs to get laid on regular basis. And yes, I’d gladly offer when given the opportunity.               → Jeez. She didn’t say anything like that. But it’s kinda soon to get laid, don’t you think?               This is clearly a note exactly for people like you. Let the poor guy have his peace. Let him               mourn and come to terms with what happened before offering him a BJ. Excuse me while I               go throw up…

→ God let her rest in peace indeed. My daughter was at school at the time, few feet from one of the bombs. She’s alive and well. I won’t forget this woman, ever.

→ Can we talk about how a person can date Captain America and be actually a nice person, not bragging all the freaking time? Like, even I might gain a superiority complex or something tbh.               → I hear you. Same.

→ She sounds cool. Seems like they were amazing together. Life can suck. RIP.

→ This is so sweet and heart-breaking I’m crying.

The person writing the last comment wasn’t alone in their misery, having their heart breaking and warmed up at the very same time. Fresh tears welled up in your eyes and you vainly tried to blink them away as you sniffled and covered your mouth with your palm to muffle your sob.

You gave up then. You tossed the tablet on the driver’s seat and hid your face in your palms, letting the tears stroll down your cheeks as your loud sobs filled the car.

You had no actual reason to cry, you reasoned with yourself, but it was all in vain. The many confusing and overwhelming emotions swirling in you finally found a proper out – and it was in the form of salty waterfalls on your face.

So be it. God knew that good cry might be exactly what you needed. Better now than in front of your soulmate.

Something told you it wouldn’t be too hard to find him.

༻༺༻༺༻ღ༺༻༺༻༺

“Well. You look like shit,” Dean exclaimed when he opened the door, effectively causing you a heart-attack. Your tense shoulders slumped and you melted into the seat, looking up at him with your no doubt red-rimmed eyes.

Still, his compassionate eyes somehow smiled at you, warm and open and you couldn’t help attempting a smile in return. You were the luckiest girl on Earth to be taken care of by them.

Thank God for Sam and Dean.

Or thank angels? One in particular? You didn’t know and perhaps you never would.

“Thanks, Dean. You know how to sweet-talk a girl,” you rasped, blowing your nose in an unladylike manner (not caring).

“Ha! Sassy mouth is back. Sam, she’s good!”

Sam peeked to the car, his tall form nearly bending in half to do so. He offered you an apologetic expression along with a ‘hi’ and a pointed look at his brother, but you mouthed it was alright. Dean actually lifted your spirit.

“So… what now?” you asked in a small voice, which caused the brothers to exchange a look.

“Well. Two things. First, we have lunch-“

“Not really hungry, honestly-“ you interrupted Dean, only for the younger brother to interject.

“A small lunch then, even if it’s only the cake you had earlier,” Sam offered with a wink which would have made you laugh, because health-freak Sam suggested a cake for lunch, but you were dreading the second step in their plan.

“And then?”

Instinctively, you knew the answer. It was the writing on the wall, really, the only logical step. The cause of the knot in your stomach of which you weren’t sure was nerves, nausea or excitement.

Dean confirmed your suspicion of course.

“Then we go to the Avengers Tower to find America’s sweetheart.”

༻༺༻༺༻ღ༺༻༺༻༺

Part 13

༻༺༻༺༻ღ༺༻༺༻༺

Thank you for reading! 

We really are getting close now, aren’t we? :)) Yay?

P.S. - if anyone wants on the taglist - or out - shoot me a dm or an ask, it’s (usually) no problem :))

[sunflowerhazzavol6]

Pacific Coast

A/N- This is probably the first time I’ve sat down and written an entire piece in one afternoon and I actually really enjoyed writing this one, so I hope you all love it as much as I do! I’ll probably start getting to your requests tomorrow, but please feel free to put one in if you haven’t already! I’m excited about what I’ve seen in there so far and I can’t wait to get to writing.

Y/N is with her sister in Malibu, CA to grieve their father and to continue a tradition that he had carried on from their childhood. While there, she meets a familiar stranger and finds herself to be more confident and comfortable with him than with anyone else before him. 3,500 words of pretty much pure fluff with a Jamaica-esque Harry :) Marijuana usage and cursing.

She knew it was the right decision as soon as she let herself relax in the driver's seat, her hand nonchalantly placed out the window as the air blew through her fingers. She had forgotten how beautiful and familiar the Pacific Coast Highway was. Her father had taken her down here a few times during her childhood to relive his younger days as a beach bum surfer, and she treasured those memories more than anything else. Now she was older and understood the pull; Malibu made it easy to escape your boring, corporate life and fall into the easygoing nature of the tide.

Her sister sighed dreamily as she rested her head on her hand, her elbow propped in the window. “Dad would love this. His two girls, off on an adventure.”

“Sure he would. Which is exactly the reason mom would hate it.” Y/n smiles over at her, propping a joint between her lips and leaning into her sister’s hand as she lights it.

“Mom would hate this more than anything else.” Elise was two years younger than her but probably one of the most level-headed mature people she knew. Y/n would never say it out loud, but she felt incredibly lucky to be related to her best friend.

“Hate what? The weed?” She sucks in a drag, relaxing back into the seat as she blows it out and passes it back to her sister.

“Well, yeah. That and the irresponsible spending of money.”

Y/n lets out a syllable of a laugh, the last few traces of smoke escaping her lips. “Fuck it. We’re young. And if all goes to plan, we won’t be spending any of our own money on drinks, which is the biggest expense of all.”

Elise rolls her eyes but smiles, ashing the joint out the window. “So what's first on the agenda? Sunset surf?”

“Not tonight. We need to wax the boards later, though, so that we can tomorrow.” She exits the highway, following the familiar road to their favorite beach spot. The sisters pass the joint back and forth until it’s nothing but a roach, stamping it out in the empty Altoids box in the center console. Y/n can feel herself start to get giggly, the marijuana working its way through her system to relax every muscle in her body. When she looks over at her sister she sees the same thing mirrored back at her, squinty eyes with crows feet in the corners from the pure bliss.

By the time they find a parking spot she immediately jumps out of the car, running to the sand with a happy yell. It's warm from the SoCal sun, and she sighs at the familiarity of it between her toes. “ ‘Lise, grab the blanket!” She calls over her shoulder, reaching down to feel it run through her fingers. Coming to the beach always felt just as warm in her insides as it did on the outside. She could feel her father here, hear his laugh. If she closed her eyes she could feel his hand ruffle her hair, saying, “come on pumpkin, get in the water. Can you smell the salt?”

Her feet carry her forward before she has time to think about where she’s going, magnetized towards the foamy surf. If she could just feel the bubbles around her ankles, then maybe he would make an appearance, he would be right-

“Oi!” She collides with something solid and wet, and she gasps before opening her eyes. “Watch where you’re going!” A strong hand reaches out to steady her by her shoulder, and then she feels it shake with laughter. “Ah, right.”

“Fuck, sorry.” She takes a step back, blushing. “I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Or you’re stoned.” He secures his board under his arm and then runs his hand through his dark brown hair, dotted with the light grains of sand.

“Er, yeah. Sorry.” She turns an even brighter red, and prays to dear god that he would just think it was a sunburn.

“No need to apologize for being high. You and every other person here. Just maybe get some eye drops if you want to be inconspicuous.” He lets out a deep but raspy laugh, holding out his hand. “Harry.”

She grasps it in hers, giving it a firm shake. Something about him was familiar, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it. “Y/n.”

“Right. Y/n. You from around here?”

“Uh, no. I drove here with my sister from Oregon. Our dad used to bring us here in the summers and he just…” She trails off, biting her lip. “Anyways, we’re here for a long weekend to surf and get away from our lives back at home.”

“Malibu is the place to go for escaping.” He sets the end of his board down in the sand, leaning against it. She can see the stretch of his brown skin across his abdominal muscles as he does so, her eyes following the tattooed ferns on his v-line to where it disappears into his dark wetsuit, the arm sleeves tied around his waist to obstruct her view of anything else. She clears her throat and stands up straighter, hoping that the stare only felt drawn out because of her state of mind.

“Is that why you’re here?”

Harry smiles at the boldness of her question, dimples indenting into his cheeks. “Precisely why I’m here. Much harder to feel the pressures of life when your only responsibility is to make sure you don’t drown.”

“That's a funny way to look at it.”

“Is it?”

“Pretty existential if you ask me.”

He laughs again, his smile going lopsided. “Well, y/n, I guess I’ll leave you to your stoned reflections. See you around?”

“I think you’re in control of whether or not you see me around.”

His grin goes even wider at her forwardness, and she seems shocked at it herself. “I suppose you’re right.” He nods to the boardwalk some ways away. “I’ll be at Rusty’s tonight. Come by and I’ll buy you a drink.”

“Hmm. Then I guess I’ll see you around.” She crosses her arms over her chest.

“I guess you will. Nice meeting you, y/n.”

“Nice meeting you, Harry.” He shakes his head with a laugh and then nods to someone behind her before jogging away with his surfboard under his arm. Suddenly her sister is next to her, giggling.

“That didn’t take you very long at all. I’ve never seen you flirt like that in my life.”

“My god. Is my heart still beating?” She yanks her sister’s hand and pushes her two fingers against where she thought her pulse should be. “Can you feel anything?”

“Very strong. Very fast.” She laughs, looking over her shoulder at his retreating figure. “Jesus. Look at that ass, too. Did you see his tattoos?”

“Did I see his tattoos? I was practically drooling over them.” She stands on her toes to look beyond her sister. Harry is talking to a small group of girls, all of whom seem to be overly ecstatic about the handsome man in front of them. Y/n gets the sense of knowing him again before shaking it off. “You’re sure my heart is still working?”

“Positive. What did he say?”

“I think he asked me out.”

“He did what?!” Elise drops the blanket in her arms onto the sand, grabbing y/n’s shoulders. “What exactly did he say?”

“He said he’d see me around, so I said that that was up to him, and then he said he’d be at some place called Rusty’s.”

“Y/n!” She shakes her older sister aggressively with a laugh. “He totally asked you out! Or actually, you asked him.”

“I did? Fuck, how much did I smoke?” She puts a hand on her forehead with a groan, but starts laughing immediately after. “I never would have done that if dad was here.”

“No, you definitely wouldn’t. Now let's get some sun, you beach slut. Calm you down a little bit before you jump someone’s bones.”

The sky is a dark hazy orange when she stands at the entrance of Rusty’s, chewing on her lower lip nervously. Her sister had insisted on the white crop top with the straight neckline, talking about how she had incredible collarbones and needed to show them off. Y/n had never considered the sex appeal of collar bones, but trusted Elise to know what suited her. She had paired it with high-waisted jeans that she had thrifted a year ago. They were her favorite pair- worn perfectly to fit the comfort she required with her clothing while also shaping each curve of her body. If she had her own pair of magical traveling pants, these were it, and her sister had agreed that they were the right choice if she wanted to seem nonchalant in her desire to get laid. Not that that was the goal. Although it would be nice to-

Her thoughts are interrupted again by Harry, though this time he's dressed in a mostly-unbuttoned blue floral shirt and yellow swimming shorts. Two sparrows on his pectoral muscles peak from behind the fabric, and she ignores the feeling in the pit of her stomach about what else the shirt was hiding. “Y/n. It seems like daydreaming isn’t just a stoned thing for you, eh?”

“Apparently not.” She reaches up to play with the gold chain of her necklace, a small garnet hanging from the end of it. “You know, most people wear more clothes when they’re on shore, not less.”

“Is that so? I wasn’t aware you had a particular dress code in mind for me to follow.” He smiles at her teasingly, crossing his arms over his chest. His biceps bulge at the contact but she pays them no mind, focusing instead on his eyes. What before had seemed like a sea-glass green were now more of a murky color, brooding and mysterious.

“I don’t. Just an observation.”

“Ah. Maybe you should tell me more of your many observations inside, yeah?”

“Shouldn’t you be so lucky.” She remarks with a smile. He laughs and follows her inside the bar, pressing a warm hand to the exposed skin of her back as he guides her through the crowd of people. She shudders at the contact, allowing him to bring her to the bar. She doesn’t even hear what he orders for them, soaking up the scene. It seemed busy for a Thursday night, most of the patrons either young people around their age or retired locals.  She had been here before, but hadn’t remembered it after so many years. She cranes her neck until her eyes find the booth that she had inhabited. For a second she thinks she can see the familiar sandy blonde hair of her dad, but as soon as she does it’s gone.

“I hope you like beer.” Harry holds up two full pints, both foaming at the top above the amber liquid. “They’re known for their drafts.”

“I love beer. But how do you even know if I’m 21?”

Harry raises his eyebrows and his eyes go wide. “Are you not?”

“I’m 22. But you didn’t know that. What if you were supplying alcohol to a minor?”

He shrugs. “Drinking laws in America are dumb as it is. But this would have been a very short date.”

She smiles, taking one of the pints from his hand. “A man of morals, I see.”

“A man with seemingly skewed morals.” He looks over her head and then back down to her face. “Want to go sit on the patio? The sun hasn’t quite set yet and I want to see if it flashes green tonight.” She nods, and again his palm finds its way to her back as he lets her lead them to a table at the edge with an unobstructed view of the skyline. He clears his throat and she laughs when he pulls her chair out for her.

“What an English gentleman.” She says as she sits, setting her beer down on the table.

“I’m nothing if not a gentleman.” He boasts, but his dimples allude to his teasing.

“My dad used to look for the green flash too. Mom used to lecture him endlessly for ruining his eyesight, but no matter what we were doing or where we were in Malibu, he would find his way to some cliff or beach to watch the sun set.”

“Used to?”

Y/n looks down, brushing her finger up the side of her glass to gather the condensation in distraction. “Uh, yeah. He died a few months ago. Cancer.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Harry puts a hand over her hand on the table, and their eyes meet. Usually when people apologized for her loss, they were sympathetic but otherwise empty. Harry’s were genuine, empathetic even. “I lost my step-dad a while back. It fucking sucks.”

She laughs a bit at his bluntness. “It does. There's really no other way to describe it. Because it affects everyone at some point, right? And it’s no one's fault. It just... fucking sucks.”

“So that’s why you’re here then? You mentioned earlier that he brought you here in the summer.”

She smiles at his memory. “Yeah. My sister and I didn’t want to halt tradition just because he couldn’t be here. Even as adults he insisted that we come along with, so it kind of just became something that we expected to do every summer for the rest of our lives. I don’t know. I guess we didn’t want to stop just because he was gone. If anything he’d want us to continue to enjoy the place he loved so much.”

“I like that. That you didn’t even really have to think about it.” He holds up his glass. “Well in that case, to your dad. May Malibu always be a place for him to be with you.”

Y/n feels tears sting her eyes as she holds up her own glass to clink against his. “To dad.”

She watches as Harry takes a swig of his beer while she mirrors him. Immediately he jumps into conversation, sensing her need for distraction while she reflects. He talks a bit of nonsense about how the surfing was that day, watching her face to read into where her head was at. He was always good at that, and could sense even the slightest change in someone's demeanor. Y/n seemed like the type to wear her heart on her sleeve, and seemed emotionally intelligent enough to the point where she would deal with her emotions when she felt them rather than pushing them to the side. When the clouds in her eyes seem to disappear he slides to sit beside her rather than across from her, casually slinging his arm over the back of her chair. “Look. Sun is setting. You know, I’ve been told that if you can see the flash, you get a wish.”

“Is that so?” She subconsciously leans into him, watching the skyline. The rest of the bar seems to settle into a gentle hum as everyone cranes to see the sun.

“Definitely.” He drops his hand to her arm, rubbing his thumb back and forth. She bites her lip at the contact, looking up at him. His features, while chiseled and structured, were equally as soft and kind. She could sense that in the future he would sport crows feet at the corner of his eyes while others would harbor insecurity over the frown lines in their forehead. Her eyes followed the slope of his nose down to his shell-pink lips, and then jumped back up just in time to see the bright green reflecting in his eyes. As soon as it’s there it’s gone, and his pupils dilate when they meet hers. “Did you see the-”

Now it’s her turn to cut him off, her lips pressing to his. His eyes widen in surprise before drifting shut, his lips softening to invite hers in more. He didn’t need to ask her to know what her wish was, and found himself drawing her closer, needing more, more, more. He had never felt a kiss like this before, one filled equally with passion and softness. He could feel the air of self-consciousness in her lips as she started to pull away, and just as quickly he brought her back in with the pull of his own lips, coaxing her into relaxation. When he finally does separate their lips she’s rendered speechless, glancing around. No one seems to have noticed, too busy discussing the phenomenon they just witnessed. Meanwhile she’s processing the phenomenon in her own head, eating away at the walls of her belly.

“Wow.” He breathes, scratching the back of his neck before looking around. When his eyes come back to hers he grins, the left side of his mouth quirked up higher than the right. “Wow.”

She clears her throat, taking a sip of her beer and raising her eyebrows at him over the glass. He laughs, and when she comes back up he kisses her again, gliding his tongue along her upper lip to collect the foam before pulling back into his own seat, the boyish smirk taking over his face. “Anyways.”

“Anyways.” She repeats.

“How was that?”

“I’ll consider giving a good Yelp review.”

He laughs and she can’t help but kiss him again. This makes him smile more, and he leans back into a stretch as she pulls away, clearly pleased with himself. “Well that concludes your tour of Malibu nightlife, anything beyond that is going to cost you a pretty penny. I suppose I could cut you a discount, since you’re grieving and all…” He trails off when she smacks him, and he grabs her wrist while he laughs. “If you’re going to be throwing yourself at me like that, at least buy me dinner first.”

“God, you’re relentless!” Her cheeks are a bright red now, and he slides his hand so their fingers are intertwined.

“Seriously, you want some food? They’ve got some mean burgers here. I won’t make you pay though. Although I do expect more of whatever that was afterwards.”

“Harry.” She hisses through her teeth. “God, I’m never kissing anyone off of a whim again.”

“I sure hope not. I liked that being just for me.” He waves at a waitress, who seems to know him. She mouths the word ‘burger?’ and he holds up two fingers. She nods before walking away.

“Do you always come here and kiss strange girls?” Y/n asks, laughing.

“No. You’d be the first. Usually I drown here in my loneliness and drink until the pain ebs away.” He takes a sip of his beer. “Not actually. But I do come here enough that they know my order it seems.”

“Interesting.” She smiles into her glass as she finishes off the beer.

“Wow. I’m going to have to keep up with you.” He finishes his own, before taking his sunglasses out of his hair and ruffling it.

“So, Harry, what do you do?”

“Hmm? Oh. I’m a musician.”

“You are?” She perks up a bit, folding her arms on the table in front of her. “What kind of music?”

“Any, really. Lots of rock influences, but I mainly just play whatever feels right.”

“Anything I would know?”

He smiles and she’s immediately frustrated by his coyness. “Harry.”

“What?” He grins even wider, playing with the napkin dispenser.

Suddenly it hits her like a truck. Her own familiarity with him, the girls on the beach. “Styles. You’re Harry Styles.”

He hums as a confirmation, running a hand through his hair. “So about that Yelp review…”

She can’t help but laugh, shaking her head and burying her face in her arms with a groan.

“What’s that about?” He snorts.

“I just threw myself on a world renowned rock star.”

“I licked beer off of your lip.” He points out, leaning down to rest his chin on his arms in front of her.

“Only because I suffocated you with my misplaced hormones.” She peeks out from her forearms, and he can see the blush on the tips of her cheeks.

“Misplaced? Hardly. You only jump started what I would have done later. Though I would have done it consensually, mind you.” He sits up straight while she groans and buries her face back into her arms. “Y/n, I’m teasing.” He laughs. She holds up her middle finger and he grabs her hand, kissing her knuckles. His voice drops to a hushed whisper. “Y/n, if I didn’t want to kiss you I wouldn’t have. Can you please come out of hiding now?”

She slowly sits back up, glaring at him. “You could have told me who you really were before I threw myself at you.”

“I kind of like that you agreed to go out with me without knowing.”

“So we’re inflating your ego now, are we? That’s at least one star deducted.”

He grins at the return of her playfulness. “What a shame. I suppose I’ll have to earn it back, hm?” He leans into her.

“I suppose you will.”

[isidar-mithrim]

A new beginning

While Ron and Hermione are in Australia, Neville and Harry are about to begin their career as Aurors, the raw memories of the battle still fresh in their minds, among some happy thoughts.

{Written for the second weekly prompt on the Hinny Discord: “Think about a teacher who inspired you. What would you say to them if they walked through the door right now?”}

[Read on Ao3]

Edit: I forgot to copy here my thanks! So, many thanks to @glisseowrites for betaing <3 Goes without saying that any residual errors is her fault :P

And also thanks to Flo for spotting the misuse of ‘Minister’ ^^

___________________________________

Neville recognised him right away, his unruly black hair unmistakable even from the further corner of the cafe.

Harry let his gaze roam around the room and Neville waved a hand, nodding in salute when Harry spotted him and walked towards the table.

Grinning, Neville stood up to clap on his shoulder.  “Morning.”

“Hello, Nev,” Harry greeted him, taking a seat on the stool in front of him. “Ginny says hi too.”

“Oh.” He hadn’t expected her name to come up so soon (or at all, actually). “Well, er… thanks. So, does that mean you two…”

As Neville trailed off, Harry’s eyes went wide, a light blush spreading on his cheeks.

“Sorry,” said Neville hastily, cursing himself for making him uncomfortable. “I shouldn’t have asked, it’s none of my b–”

“No, it’s ok,” said Harry, raising a hand. “We, er... yeah... we’re good.”

Neville beamed. “That’s great. I knew you’d be.”

“Really?”

“Of course! She missed you a lot, at Hogwarts. Not that she ever admitted it out loud, obviously, but…” He shrugged. “We could tell.”

“Oh…” mumbled Harry, rubbing his scar absentmindedly. “That’s…”

He swallowed, clearly at a loss for words, and Neville felt a wave of affection for his friend.

“You really deserve it,” he said earnestly. “Both of you do.”

Harry’s lips were tugged into a coy smile. “Thanks, Nev. And… for what it’s worth… I’m sorry I –”

“Hello, guys. What can I get you?”

They both turned their heads towards the waitress, a very cute woman whose blonde plaits reminded Neville of Hannah’s.

“Er… coffee, for me,” said Harry. “And a treacle tart. Thanks.”

The waitress beamed at him. “You’re welcome.”

She seemed quite taken by Harry’s striking green eyes, noticed Neville with amusement. He had to clear his throat to get her attention, biting back a smile when the girl jolted in surprise, blushing.

“And for you?” she asked, her voice a bit higher than before.

“A slice of Victoria sponge and a cup of tea, please.”

“Perfect, I’ll be right back. Call me if you’d like to order anything else, I’ll leave you the menus.”

Neville didn’t miss the soft smile she gave to Harry before walking away.

“She’d be really upset to know you’re already taken,” he teased when she was out of earshot.

Harry blinked at him, bemused. “You mean the waitress?”

Neville tried not to laugh. “Who else? And to think she doesn’t even know you’ve just saved the world!”

“She was just being nice,” mumbled Harry, suddenly very interested in the menu.

“Yeah, you tell Ginny that,” said Neville with glee. “Merlin’s beard, witches from all over the planet are going to be desperate when they hear the news.”

Harry looked up, his expression sheepish. “Er, about that… we, erm… well, we’d prefer to keep it quiet, this time. You know, at least until things are a bit more settled.”

“Oh. Sure.” Neville privately suspected that that had a lot to do with Harry and much less to do with Ginny, but he certainly wasn’t going to address that. “I understand.”

“I mean, her family knows, and it’s not like we’re keeping it a secret, so I’m not asking you to lie for us or anything like that, but…”

Neville smirked. “But no more kisses in the middle of the common room.”

“Ha, ha. Very funny.” Harry had spoken in a deadpan tone, but he was smiling. “Just… don’t shout it around, will you?”

“Don’t worry, my lips are sealed. I was only planning to tell Rita Skeeter,” he assured him, thoroughly enjoying himself.

Harry, on the other hand, looked at him with a grave expression. “I mean it, Nev. Not even around the office.”

When Neville realised the implication of those words, his amusement faded away. “You think we can’t trust the others?”

“Most of them stayed there, did they?” Harry shrugged, resigned. “How can we know if they were sabotaging the Ministry from the inside, playing along, or right down helping them?”

Neville sighed. “We can’t,” he conceded. “But…”

He fell silent when he spotted the waitress coming back, and a moment later she arrived with a loaded tray balanced on one hand.

“Here we are,” she said, looking pointedly at Neville. “The Victoria sponge and the tea were for you, right?”

When he nodded, she took his order from the tray and laid it carefully on the table. Only then she finally locked her blue eyes with Harry’s, a dazzling smile brightening her beautiful face.

“So, the treacle tart and the coffee must be for you.”

Harry swallowed, awkwardly flattening his hair. “Er, yeah. Thanks.”

“Wonderful. Please, call me if you need anything else.”

Neville added milk to his tea and stirred it, forcing himself to stay impassive, but as soon as the waitress was far enough, he grinned at Harry, who rolled his eyes in response.

“She’s just being nice, eh?”

“Shut up,” muttered Harry, grabbing a sugar cube and throwing it at him.

Neville barked a laugh. “Tell me, how many marriage proposals have you received so far?”

Harry narrowed his eyes, looking unexpectedly pensieve with his coffee hanging in mid air. “None, actually,” he admitted, his tone perplexed.

Neville shot him an amused glance. “Aren’t you a bit young for that, anyway?”

Harry rolled his eyes again, but his lips twitched. “I was just wondering if someone at the Ministry is checking my mail or, well, intercepting it.” He took a sip of coffee. “I haven’t got a letter since forever.”

“Oh.” Neville thought of the bunch of letters he had received from his parents’ old friends to congratulate him. A couple of them were still in the Aurors, and that made him realise he ought to resume the conversation that the arrival of their order had interrupted. “That’s… weird, I guess.”

Harry sighed. “I’ll ask Kingsley to have a look into it. Who knows, maybe it was something organised by the Order so the Ministry wouldn’t find me.”

“Yeah, maybe,” said Neville, who felt like they had more pressing topics to discuss. He blew on his tea and took a long sip. “Look, about what you were saying before… My gran mentioned a couple of Aurors that were friends with my parents, so I’d like to think we can trust them.” He tried not to take Harry’s mildly skeptical expression too personally. “And about the rest… I know it’s no excuse, but lots of people in the Ministry had kids or nephews or even grandkids at Hogwarts, and… believe me, that means they weren’t exactly in the position to oppose the Ministry.”

Harry sent him an odd glance, and Neville wondered if he was thinking about Ginny’s dad as well. He waited in silence and took another sip of tea, suspecting Harry needed a bit of time to sort out his thoughts.

“Earlier, when you said that… that Ginny missed me… I was meaning to say... just, you know…” He took a deep breath, his eyes fixed on his coffee. “I’m very sorry I wasn’t there.”

Neville lowered his mug, staring at him in disbelief. “You’re kidding, right?”

“I’m not.” Harry had spoken firmly, and for a moment he looked again like he was carrying the weight of the world upon his shoulders. “What you went through… It must have been awful.”

“It was,” said Neville matter-of-factly. From the way Harry raised his eyebrows, he could tell he was taken aback. “One more reason for you not to be there, the way I see it. And in all honesty, I think we were better off without you.” He grinned. “Troubles always seem to follow you.”

Harry chuckled, and Neville felt quite pleased for cheering him up.

“And yet you want to work with me,” said Harry with a lighter tone, his lips curved upwards. “Doesn’t seem so wise, does it?”

“Not at all,” said Neville, still grinning. “But I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Harry huffed with humour. “Suit yourself, then, but don’t hold it against me if you’ll end up with a weird scar on your forehead.”

“’Course I will,” he said cheerfully. “It’s clearly your fault if I’ve been asked to join.”

Harry raised his mug towards him in mock salute, smiling. “You’re welcome.”

Neville mirrored him, clinking their mugs together.

“I mean it, though,” he pressed after sipping his tea, more serious. “I wouldn’t be here, if it weren’t for you. You know that, right?”

Harry’s stunned expression was answer enough. “I…” He swallowed. “You would have done that too. Lots of people would have.”

Neville shook his head. “I wasn’t speaking about that,” he said gently, and Harry seemed even more puzzled. “I meant the D.A.”

“The D.A.?”

“You see, I never thought I had it in me to be an Auror… to follow my parents’ steps. It seemed like an impossible dream, one I barely allowed myself to dwell on... and then you started the D.A.”

“It wasn’t me,” said Harry decisively. “It was all Hermione’s idea, she was the one who –”

“It was you who taught us, though.” Neville looked at him into the eyes, his chin held up.  “And look at us now.”

Harry lowered his gaze to his plate and began cutting the slice of treacle tart in little pieces. “I made all of you believe that… that everybody had to fight, that it’d be cowardly not to do it, that…”

Neville felt a surge of deep compassion for his old friend and his unfair, aching guilt. “You gave us hope,” he said fiercely. “You made us survive.”

“Not all of you,” Harry murmured, so low that Neville almost didn’t catch it. His head was still bent, but Neville noticed his hard blinking nonetheless, and he felt a heavy knot clenching around his heart.

“Colin wasn’t your fault, Harry. If anything, I was the one to call him back. To call everybody back.”

“Only because I was there.”

Neville sighed. He felt like he was fighting a lost cause, but he owed Harry that much. “I promise you this year would have been even worse, without the D.A.”

“At least people would have stayed out of trouble,” muttered Harry, twirling his mug between his hands.

“Would they really, though? Because I clearly remember you saying you couldn’t have done it without all of us, after the battle. Bit pointless to stay out of trouble if you-know — sorry, if Voldemort would have won.”

Harry opened and closed his mouth. “I…”

“I know it’s hard on you,” said Neville. “But… I guess I like to believe that most of us would have stayed and fought anyway, even if the D.A. had never existed.”

Harry didn’t look so persuaded, and Neville decided there was only one way to pull him out of his own head.

“You know, it’s a bit rude of you to think we wouldn’t have,” he said provocatively.

As predicted, Harry’s head immediately jerked up: he looked half horrified, half mortified. “I… I didn’t mean… That’s not what I… I’d never… I’m just...” He took a deep breath, rubbing his scar again. “I’m not undermining what you did, Nev. That’s… the last thing I want, actually. I promise.”

“Yeah,” nodded Neville. “I know.”

“I meant what I said the other day. I’ll make sure people hear about you all.”

“I know you will.”

“I’m just…” He shrugged, letting out a breath. “I guess what I wanted to say is, I’m sorry I dragged you in all that.”

“Funny,” said Neville, “because I’m glad you did.”

Harry looked at him in disbelief. “Don’t say that,” he admonished, his voice sharp.

Neville ignored him. “I’m glad I could fight beside you. I’m glad I could help. I’m glad you asked me to kill the snake, even if -”

“You shouldn’t be!” said Harry, frustration blatant in his voice. “Can’t you see it? You shouldn’t have had to endure all this!”

“You shouldn’t have either.”

“I didn’t have a choice, did I?” bit back Harry.

“I know,” said Neville, placatingly. “And I’m sorry.”

Harry seemed taken aback by those words, and Neville wondered if he’d been the first person to tell him that. “But… even when I had the chance, I don’t think I could have chosen anything different either, you know? And if I’ve been able to outlive the consequences of that choice, it’s only thanks to your lessons. It’s only thanks to you.” He thought of the Chocolate Card tucked in the front pocket of his shirt, alongside the D.A. coin and the Drooble’s Best Blowing Gum wrapping his gran had sent him with her pride. “You’re the first person that really believed in me. The first to think I was worth something.” He thought of those meaningful words heard years before, words he’d never forgotten… words he’d never forget. You’re worth twelve of him.

“Blimey, Neville,” said Harry in a hoarse voice. With his eyes shut and his fingers pushing up the glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose, he looked at the same time incredibly young and years older than he was. It was odd to think they were born just one day apart.

“You know,” said Neville with a conversational tone, trying to spare Harry the embarrassment of acknowledging his words properly, “when we talked with Kingsley I realised that the only time I’ve been in the Ministry before then, was the day I went with you.”

“Oh. Right.”

Harry didn’t seem as relieved as he had hoped. A moment later, Neville realised with horror why: that was the day Sirius Black had died.

Unable to stand that awkward silence, Neville started rambling. “That… that was the first moment I thought ‘Hey, maybe I have what it takes to be an Auror, after all’; then of course my marks weren’t good enough, but… it was nice, to feel like… like I could have been.”

“You can be, Neville. You are.”

He chuckled lightly. “Yeah… I guess I am. Life is weird, eh?”

“It is,” agreed Harry. He checked his watch, and Neville threw him a questioning glance.

“We’ve still got twenty minutes before we have to go,” Harry reassured him, taking a sip of coffee.

“What about you, then?” asked Neville. “Have you always known you wanted to be an Auror?”

Harry looked pensieve for a moment. “Remember when you said life is weird?”

Neville put down his mug, nodding.

“Well… I didn’t even know that Aurors existed, until Moody. He’s the first Auror I’ve heard of, and he – the fake one, I mean – was the first to tell me that I’d –” He frowned. “Are you okay, Nev?”

Only then Neville realised he was holding his breath, his jaw clenched. He exhaled, relaxing the hand he had clamped around the mug handle. “Yeah,” he murmured, taking a bite of cake to buy some time. He chewed in silence, his blood pulsing in his ears, his mind going back to the awful day McGonagall had told him who had taken Professor Moody’s place.

“Shit,” blurted Harry. He was looking at him with wide eyes, comprehension written on his features. “I’m sorry, Neville, I shouldn’t have mentioned him. I’m an idiot.”

“It’s okay. I forgot about your godfather, did I?”

“Oh. Well, that’s not...”

Neville offered him a sheepish smile. “What if we call it even and leave it at that?”

“Sure,” said Harry hastily, shoving a piece of treacle tart in his mouth.

Neville took his lead and busied himself with his Victoria sponge, but he couldn’t stop dwelling about what Harry had said. To think that Barty Crouch had somehow inspired both of them was unsettling, but it was also oddly comforting to know he hadn’t been the only one to be fooled.

“He was also the first to acknowledge I was good in Herbology,” admitted Neville in a low voice. Against his expectations, Harry didn’t look so surprised.

“You already knew?”

Harry nodded, his face grim. “That book about aquatic plants... He gave it to you because he thought I’d ask for your help for the Second Task.”

Neville stared at him, his stomach squirming unpleasantly. He had never felt as used as he was feeling now, but in a way it was almost a relief to know that Crouch hadn’t taken him under his wing just for mere sadism.

Harry swallowed, looking anywhere but at him. “I’m very sorry I didn’t ask for your help, back then. It was very stupid of me.”

And of course Harry had to blame himself for that too.

Neville smiled kindly. “It’s water under the bridge, now. You made it up for it plenty enough.”

Harry didn’t look too convinced, but he gave him a weak nod. “Can I ask you something?”

“’Course.”

“You said Crouch was the first to recognise your talent in Herbology, but… what about Sprout?”

“Oh, well… I reckon she had always been pleased with my work, yeah, but I don’t think I ever thought I was good enough to make a career of it, before… before Crouch said he believed I could.”

Harry narrowed his eyes, looking perplexed and surprised at the same time. “I thought you wanted to be an Auror.”

“I didn’t really believe I could, back then, did I? But now things are different, now I know I can actually give a hand, and since Kingsley is asking for all the help he can get…”

It was weird to say out loud what he had kept repeating to himself for the past few days. He believed all of that, truly, but a part of him secretly wondered if the real reasons he was doing it was a different one.

I’m very proud of you, Neville. Your parents will be too.

“What did they do?” he blurted out.

Harry blinked at him, confused, and Neville felt his neck grew hot.

“Er… your parents, I meant.” He cleared his throat. “What did they do for a living?”

Harry was startled, his green eyes wide behind the round lenses.

“It’s ok if you don’t want to talk about it,” Neville hurried to add, fearing he had overstepped.

Harry slowly lowered his fork. “I… I don’t really know, to be honest.”

Neville really hadn’t seen that coming. It felt like a punch in his gut.

“I think they… they just joined the Order, after Hogwarts. I guess… I guess they thought they could start working after Voldemort had fallen...”

After that awkward confession, they stayed silent for a bit, eating their food and dwelling on their parents’ cruel destiny.

For once, it was Harry to break the ice.

“My mum was a good potioneer,” he said out of the blue. “Slughorn was very fond of her. I… I like to imagine she’d have been a good teacher, I think.”

Neville almost joked that she would have surely been better than Snape, but he remembered just in time that Harry had gotten a bit protective of their old professor.

“I’m sure she’d have been,” he said instead, smiling. “I bet you took it from her, you were great in the D.A.”

“Oh… thanks, Nev.”

“Have you ever considered becoming D.A.D.A. professor, one day?”

“Nah, I reckon I’ve already taken too many risks in my life. I much prefer the Aurors survival rates.”

Neville chortled, humored. “If there’s one person that can survive teaching that class, that’s got to be you, Harry.” He smirked. “Imagine how famous you’d become if you could last more than one year.”

Harry huffed, shaking his head in amusement, then he seemed to realise something, because he frowned, pensieve. “You know what, I actually think things might be different from now on. It was Voldemort who cursed it. He wanted it for himself, but Dumbledore refused.”

Neville froze in the act of biting a piece of cake.  “He wanted to teach?”

Harry nodded, his expression dark. “Insane, eh?”

“Well, I guess I shouldn’t be so surprised, after sitting through Carrow’s lessons,” said Neville grimly.

Harry sighed. “I guess not.” He checked his watch again. “Time to leave, I reckon.”

They both stood up, and Neville insisted on paying, knowing Harry was still sorting things out with Gringotts (and with the blonde waitress). “Help me with this sodding paper money, though. I’ve no idea how Muggles manage not to rip them up.”

Afterward, they headed out of the cafe, walking towards the Ministry.

“For what it’s worth,” said Harry, “I reckon you’d be a great teacher too.”

“Me?”

“Of course.” Harry looked nonplussed. “Kids would love you. But…” He took a deep breath. “I’m truly glad we’re in this together.”

Neville felt really touched by his words. Ignoring the lump in his throat, he gave him a proud nod. “I’ll watch your back, Harry.”

“I know,” he said, and Neville would have sworn Harry was a bit touched as well.

“Let’s hope there’ll be no need, anyway.”

“Yeah… I’m sorry I worried you with my paranoia, but Ron isn’t here, and…”

“I’m not worried, Harry,” said Neville earnestly. “I’m with you.”

Harry’s eyebrows shot upwards. “I…” He swallowed, at a loss for words yet again, and Neville waited patiently.

“Thank you,” said Harry eventually, his voice raspy. “For... everything.”

Neville nodded, and after a couple of steps a cheery thought struck him. He bit back a smile. “You know who we won’t have to worry about?”

“Who?”

“Dawlish,” he said with a smirk. “He’s still at St. Mungo’s. My gran can’t stop bragging about it.”

Harry laughed out loud, and they walked forward with matching grins, a new beginning waiting ahead.

[fizzingwizard]

So I played Snowy Escape this week! It’s my cup of tea! I watched LGR’s review (and Plumbella’s too) and yeah, as usual, I agree with both of them. The pack doesn’t give us a lot that’s really new, especially in terms of gameplay, and I really wish there had been even small interactive moments aboard trains and ski lifts. However, I also agree that it’s a really aesthetically beautiful pack. The way tourists who haven’t gone to Japan yet think of Japan might be like Tokyo Shibuya area, or Osaka shopping streets... but uh, Tokyo and Osaka are only two cities in all of Japan, and pretty much the entire rest of the country isn’t like that. The majority of Japan’s tourist attractions are nature- and history-based, after all.

The big question for me was just how touristy “Mt Komorebi” was going to come across. Sims is pretty noticeably America-centric, and Western culture is the norm. They put out Jungle Adventure and it’s like stepping into a 90s action movie. The most progressive thing you can say about the locals in that pack is that, due to being governed by the same rules that apply to all Sims, they don’t come across “different” enough to be straight up othered. The area they live in, of course, is underdeveloped in spite of the “culture” skill, and very much is meant to be an exotic adventure for Indiana Jones.

Komorebi’s not that bad though. I was impressed at first by the amount of detail there seemed to be. I never expected we’d get space heaters and kotatsu and nabe in-game without downloading CC. Taking off your shoes to go inside, using chopsticks, sliding doors (which I’ve wanted more of for SO LONG), are all true to life as well as modern and also just nice to have. There’s some weird bits, like how when sims sit at the kotatsu they don’t sit on their knees, their legs just disappear into the floor... I guess we can assume there’s a hole underneath (which is the case with some kotatsu just not usually the at-home kind). I also would have liked more every day interactions, like doing homework at the kotatsu or watching TV or even taking a nap.

The patterns for yukata/kimono are pretty awful though. The more understated ones I can live with, but anything with a splash of color is a fashion disaster.

The look of the houses in the towns are really nice. The interiors, not so much, but that’s easier to fix than the facade and landscaping for most of us. The non-interactive backgrounds areas really do look like Japan. It’s a pity we can’t explore it at all. (I would have LOVED just one interactive conbini. That’s one Japan staple that it’s simply weird to leave out. They probably figured conbini wouldn’t have anything the vending machines don’t have, but personally I’d rather have conbini than vending machines. Unless they made it rabbit hole, in which case fuck it)

Also liked the snow festival and the lights festival. It’s true there’s not a lot to do at them, other than take pictures, and it was really hard to get good pictures with my sims in them... When I went to snow festivals, you could do things like light candles in little snow cubbies, or have a meal in a kamakura, etc. That would have been nice. Otherwise it’s just look at the pretty sights and make normal snowmen. Same with the lights festival - it’s gorgeous, but... They do have food stalls but the variety is limited. You can get four different kinds of yakisoba and ramen but no okonomiyaki, no ikayaki. There’s no festival games. I’m currently festival-starved due to covid-19 so my hopes were a bit higher. Still... like I said, I enjoyed them. I guess I just like pretty things. And I do spend an inordinate amount of time just taking pictures of my Sims doing things anyway xP

The Youth festival is pretty dull. It seems more like a not!Pokemon festival than anything else. The crepes, however, are great. Also it’s really WEIRD that the koinobori (the carp flags) are out all the time, like a normal decoration, in the city. That’s one culture thing that I think got confused.

So as far as it goes... it’s not as touristy as I expected it to be. I give it props for that. It’s definitely still got a vibe of “non-Japanese foreigner goes for a visit,” as in, I think if a Japanese company made a Sims game with Japanese players in mind, they’d have done a ton things differently. But we got a more robust cultural depiction than we ever have before, so, nice.

The winter sports are fun! I weirdly didn’t get bored even though like LGR says, it is just watching the Sims do the same thing over and over again without any player interaction. That does suck but is also par for the course with Sims 4. Since I play multiple Sims at a time, it’s easy for me to stick one on the bunny slope and just let them ski until they level up while I do something else with another Sim :P (Sims is more fun when you cheat!)

The onsen is a let down. It’s nice, sure. It’s just a spa though. And it’s WEIRD that you can have sex in the onsen while other people are in it, even children, and they are not freaked out, but you can’t skinny dip in front of children. All they get is an uncomfortable moodlet afterwards because now the onsen water is dirty x’D I wonder if that’s an oversight that will get tweaked in the future...

However, onsen is very pretty too. I would have liked a smaller building and better landscaping with two or three hot springs to pick from. Also, there are gendered entrance curtains, but they don’t actually divide Sims by gender and all lead to the same place... I guess it’s good to have for pictures at least. If you want to put in the ladies room and mens room doors you could easily make his and hers as well as a mixed hot spring baths. I think this is one we just have to let the Sim builder greats take on.

So HIKING is awesome! I loved it! It’s relaxing for me. Some might find it dull, but it’s really just so pretty, and for me brings back a lot of memories. Hiking in Japan is pretty much like that (although a lot more mountainous of course). It’s somewhat dependent on your graphics settings - mine aren’t that high so like the bamboo forest vanishes as I cam through it.. can’t get that sense of really being inside it. Also when I came across the cemetery I had my spellcaster try to Necrocall the one grave that has interactions, but it didn’t work, even though the option came up. ?? I was expecting some sort of cool ghost. Oh well.

I’m interested in climbing. I don’t have Fitness Stuff so I never did it before. It’s way more boring than leveling the winter sports though. But I think the mountain climb will be worth it.

There are little kodama and sprites you can come across and interact vaguely with. I’ll accept that as a Ghibli nod. It’s more cute than cultural but it’s also a bit of fun surprise, though I haven’t noticed any real effect beyond a moodlet. (Was told one gave me a present but I couldn’t find it in my inventory so I think it was just the moodlet.)

Also the bugs!! That’s very Japan! And you can buy insect repellent hahaha that’s a level of realism I didn’t ask for but will take

I’ll talk about lifestyles and sentiments too. I don’t need them personally. The sentiments are kind of nice to see, but they’re predictable. You get the same ones if you do certain things. They give you a moodlet when the Sim shows up, which I guess I do like, but... tbh it’s damn inconvenient sometimes. For ex, I played by Tsubasa family to explore Mt Komorebi, and I noticed many conversations were inexplicably becoming “awkward.” The reason was - even though no one was saying or doing anything flirty - Kurogane and Fai were getting in the mood by just looking at each other thanks to sentiments, and Sakura and Syaoran were like -___-; I mean, it’s hilarious, but also annoying!

Lifestyles... eh. So far all my Sims just get the same ones. They all seem to get Adrenaline Seeker just for playing winter sports. Also I find the pop-ups warning me when a Sim’s going to lose their lifestyle annoying, and if a Sim gets a lifestyle I don’t want for them, it’s annoying to watch their mood change for dumb reasons like “didn’t spend enough time outdoors today.” It’s the same concept as traits. It’s kind of nice that you can change them around by doing different things, and since we’re limited to three traits I won’t say no to more (for example, instead of giving a Sim the “Loves the Outdoors” trait, you can try to get the Outdoorsy lifestyle and use the trait slot for something that influences their personality more). But all in all I find my Sims still just act the same as usual and the gameplay is all in pop-ups, so it’s just not exciting for me.

Also had a glitch where Sakura would take off her shoes to go inside but when she went out, she put on a pair of snowboots that I never even equipped her with, and she wore them with every outfit. Editing in CAS didn’t help. A reboot did though.

So pretty much, I definitely think they could have done more with this pack, BUT that’s been the case with literally every pack since the base game. There are no expectations for me anymore, that’s why I really just genuinely like this one. I’m happy they picked North Japan rather than Tokyo or Osaka, I think we got a lot more detail because of that.

[seenashwrite]

Notes From Nash: Season 15, Episode 3

It's ep three, and was third try the charm? Well, we're still in that little town, which is infuriating. But don't lose hope, chickadees. There was some character arc action and some plot advancing, and just drama in general, and it moved at a decently quick clip, all of which is refreshing after last week's ass-disaster of an episode. 

If I were grading this ep, all things considered (including some damn fine acting moments that elevated the material), it's an A-. (Five points were docked immediately because we were still in the little town.) But seriously, this week's writer(s) had a LOT to make up for given the aforementioned last week as well as a largely lackluster premiere, so you know what? Props to them. 

We got a loose end from season past tied up, got rid of some dead weight, and then there was a thing that happened that I’m not entirely sure was necessary at this interval, but I get why it happened. Of course, we had our requisite random hamfisted “solution(s)” and still-unexplained bits that should’ve been clarified ages ago, can’t not have those, it seems. Regardless, this episode was actually fairly interesting to watch. I’m still wary about the state of the season after the first two, but this one had some spark.

Spoilers below the cut, you know the drill.  

This one's in order, I was jotting stuff down as I watched. Past ep breakdowns linked at the bottom. If you’re new, hello, welcome, etc., I don’t do meta shit or reading into the symbolism of the color of a blurry wallpaper just over someone’s shoulder, I look at writing and cohesiveness and structure and flow and all that jazz. I basically just call things as I see ‘em. 

//////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// 

More spooky-scary still seems to be pouring from the hellpit, but at least this crypt is pretty, and Harry Potter tent-esque because the square feet inside is seemingly bigger than the outside.  

Rowena appears to be outfitted in one of my grandmother's housedresses, or a coffin lining, or a 1980s prom dress, whichever you prefer, and none of them have been pressed. I'm trying to say I don't like it. They also continue to do Ruthie's makeup in such a manner that she perpetually looks approximately fifteen years older than she actually is, so in a way I'm thankful this is likely her last episode. On the other hand, I trust these writers and the people who assemble/green light the promos about as far as I can throw them, so we shall see. In any event, Ruthie is quite the good actor and I hope she gets a million gigs after all this is done.  

This Sam-Dean moment with Creased Brow Sam and Gruff Voice Dean is falling so flat, not because of them, but because we're hearing The Same Damn Thing We've Already Heard. Move the plot along, please----- Oh wait here comes Belphagor once again with a solution, this time a nice little plot rescue MacGuffin! Lilith's Crook. Just gotta blow it like a horn. 

Motherbitch, this is stupid.

I got a thought: make it Gabriel's horn, so it calls in all the angels who should've come back with the reverse-y switch-a-roo, and they deal with sealing the hole, but bonus! At end of ep last scene is that it's also called Gabriel back, too. I'd announce to the universe that this show needs to hire me, but, welp.

Oh look, Ketch is in a hospital gown. Oh look, I bet Ketch is about to die in that hospital gown, instead of a badass suit like it should be. It looked like DHJ accidentally spoiled via a tweet that I happened to see----- 

I dodge the promo images and articles and such so I can give a view of someone who doesn't know what is coming in these things. 

-----because he talked about coming back just to leave again, that it was a pleasure, whatever, and y'all will have to fill me in on that because I kinda can't believe he whiffed that hard. I'm not looking it up, is my point. Did he whiff? Actually, don't answer that, I don't care. I mean, don’t go to trouble looking into it on my account.  

Hmmm. Was Ketch’s death entirely necessary? At least, right now? I dunno. Maybe. I’m 50/50 whether this, or have him be double-crossy then get killed later. In any event, well-acted by DHJ. He's quite fantastic. He is wasted in all the Hallmark dreck he's been in, I really hope he gets some good work after this. That's that. Moving on. 

We're 1/4 in, and I'll give it this: we've gotten some action, some drama, but they've GOT to make up for the lack of plot progression in episode 2. Belphagor is shady as shit, which we knew, and this just got reinforced by that demon who has such a hard-on for Belphagor getting axed. 

I do not mind rando badass lady hunter having lines and playing a tangentially-important role in the ep, but this means if we ever see her again, she'll likely get killed, so I'm not getting attached. 

So hell is an angry vagina. SFX, are y'all okay? Is that prick whose tweets occasionally come across my feed still working there? Y'all need some hugs? I know y'all need some better budget, that all the DC shows got it, but oh well, that ship's sailed.  

Well done set dec, I dig the ghoulish statues in that hallway. And hey costume design, I like the ring that dude was wearing, I would wear that in real life. It would also look great as a wrist cuff. I digress. 

We know this demon is not going to succeed in killing Belphagor, so once more we have a pointless halftime cliffhanger. Also, have I mentioned I'm done with Cas being a weak puss? I'm telling you, if stuff got rewound, he should be incrementally getting his mojo back, that tracks logically. See Ep. 1 notes for what I thought should've happened for a legit "Whoa" moment. 

"Do you have any idea what he is?" --- he's a poop demon. Again, see the first episode of @youtotallymadethatup​    /shameless plug

[sighs]

Is this show gonna end with a Jack vs. Jack battle royale? Because fuck that noise. But! Writing-wise, it's okay that ol’ Belph may become the big bad. Nash, why would you say that, you ask. Easy.

IT WILL GET US THE FUCK OUT OF THIS LITTLE TOWN

A. Ny. Thing. to get us the fuck out of this little town. I am so goddamned bored.

Cas, this is a mistake. You should leave. What are you doing. Leave. Don't fall for that. Leave. Go now. Whoosh. Okay, or glow worm and barbeque the body. That was a nice little catch of emotion by Misha at the end. Except are the demons now gonna jump into his body? Better not, we've seen that season. 

Commercials! Cannot believe I've not been inundated with the adverts for the convention here in the spring, that's usually the jam. Imma go get some frozen yogurt. Highly rec strawberry with a little warmed-up Nutella. Try it, then tell me I'm crazy. I'm not. It's heavenly. 

Aaaaand, we're back!

Don't look so distressed Cas, y’all were gonna burn it anyway. But this takes Jack v. Jack off the table. Hopefully this means we'll be headed back to the Empty to get some progress on that hanging thread from last season sooner rather than later. Still, I'm glad we are down a character for awhile, this character in particular was starting to work my nerves and honestly, is just dead weight. I want it back to Sam and Dean for the most part this final season with sprinklings of Cas. Everyone else is secondary.

[claps] Very excellent Ruthie and Jared. One critique: Wish there could've been some sort of line from Rowena, re: "And perhaps I'll get to see my boy again", something of that ilk.

But I want to say this, and say it emphatically:

The nonsensical spells pulled from asses must stop

The soul-catcher thing is an example of a great move because it drew upon the past, then built upon for the present. This heart and angel blood and salt shit, and then this “Oh by the way it needs my dying breath” stuff is just obvious “um um um well how about bleh” writing stumbles, and it shows. The only reason that lameness worked? Ruthie and Jared’s performances. Period. Because y’all gave them absolute garbage to work with, and they made it shine.

Hey! There's the two convention promos with one short local ad in between, followed by the same local ad again! I was beginning to think they'd forgotten! 

WE ARE OUT OF THE LITTLE TOWN, I REPEAT, WE ARE OUT OF THE LITTLE TOWN 

DEAN IS IN A HENLEY, I REPEAT, DEAN IS IN A HENLEY 

Oof, Dean. I mean, I figured this convo would have to happen one day, it's been building, because even though his intentions are good, Cas has been involved in his fair share of shit taking left turns. Hopefully Cas is going to go seek out other angels. Also, re: Cas saying he's getting weaker - because, why? WHY. This has never been addressed in a definitive, satisfactory manner. 

Right, so, like we do each time, let's check in to see if we've had any character development and/or plot progression: 

Do Ketch and Rowena and Belphagor count, since they've progressed to being dead? Dunno, that's more of a finality to their overall arcs. Dean's being an asshole and Sam's being weepy and Cas is being an Eeyore, that's about par. Meh. Okay. So did the plot get advanced? 

YES THANK YOU FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER SWEET LORD YES. But, eh... a little weaksauce. Yes, that chapter of the initial onslaught is closed, yet we know it's not over. So I feel like the ep should've ended with, after the bunker door slams, a cut to a little scene that serves as a clue about what lies ahead. I mean, ahead-ahead, season-wise. Like, twenty second blip, not even, then hard cut to black screen, then on to promo which appears to be MotW. 

So that's it, really. More adept writers could've made the material of #1 and #2 into the premiere (minus several things, most specifically minus Kevin, should've saved Osric for something else down the line), then this should've been episode #2 instead of #3. Can't unring that bell, though. Let's hope we hit some speed before Buckleming comes along to run us into a ditch, then (fingers crossed) we have a few eps after that to rebound for the finale.

See you next week.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Past posts, from newest to oldest (and I sometimes do addendums if a response warrants)

Episode 2

Episode 1

[sdohertys]

GENERAL:

NAME: Scarlett Marina Kaufman Doherty

NICKNAME: Some people call her Scar, much to her irritation. It’s not even a cute nickname.

BIRTHDAY: January 16

AGE: 34.

GENDER: Cis Female.

PLACE OF BIRTH: Petaluma, California.

PLACES LIVED SINCE: Oakland, CA; Walnut Creek, CA

CURRENT RESIDENCE: Walnut Creek, CA

NATIONALITY: American.

ETHNICITY: Ashkenazi Jewish.

PARENTS’ NAMES: Adina and Vadim Kaufman.

NUMBER OF SIBLINGS: None.

PERSONALITY TYPE: ESTP- A - THE ENTREPRENEUR

body image mention, abandonment, death (cancer)

RELATIONSHIP WITH FAMILY: Strained. One-sided. Basically non-existent. When Scarlett hit her teen years, she’d come to the conclusion that her mother wanted a child, but she didn’t want to be a mother to that child. Their conversations consisted mainly of Scarlett’s appearance and body image, pushing her to be the most prim and proper of ladies. Her mother never called her beautiful. Vadim, on the other hand, was never around to have a real conversation with his daughter, having gone out to meet with his mistress of the year. Might as well not even have a father. She’s cut herself off from her family to the point where she legally changed her last name so she could pretend she was not related to them. After getting many phone calls from her mom when she first moved away, Scarlett changed her phone number and blocked her mom from every social media platform.

CHILDHOOD TRAUMA: When Adina found out about her husband’s many affairs, she blamed Scarlett’s birth, having said that if she never gave birth to Scarlett perhaps her figure could still be desirable enough for her husband. She then proceeded to send ten year old Scarlett away to live with a Filipino couple in their mid-50s in Oakland, who raised her until she turned 17. Scarlett continued to feel unwanted by her own mother.

PHYSICAL:

HEIGHT: 5′4″

WEIGHT: 120 lbs.

BUILD: Slim and petite.

HAIR COLOR: Dark brown.

USUAL HAIR STYLE: She styles it differently every other day, but when she’s concentrating, she pulls it back in a high ponytail. When it’s down, the length is just two inches below her shoulder blades.

EYE COLOR: Her right eye is green-blue and her left eye is a hazel color.

GLASSES? CONTACTS?: Neither.

STYLE OF DRESS/TYPICAL OUTFIT(S): Scarlett dresses in very trendy, designer clothing. A casual coffee outfit would be a cream colored blouse with dark wash skinny jeans and a pair of brown booties, with her hair in a messy bun and gold hoop earrings.

TYPICAL STYLE OF SHOES: High heels.

JEWELRY? TATTOOS? PIERCINGS?: She got her belly button pierced in high school, and she also has her ears typically pierced.

SCARS: She has a scar toward the back of her neck, right below her ear from trying to cut her own hair when she was nine years old. Her mother was less than pleased, to say the least.

UNIQUE MANNERISMS/PHYSICAL HABITS: She’ll lick her lips almost every time she takes a sip of coffee. When she’s drinking wine, she likes to tap her index finger just below the rim.

ATHLETICISM: She’s not into fitness, like at all. She loves to eat and she loves to drink. Her main source of exercise is walking for miles in her heels and running around stores.

HEALTH PROBLEMS/ILLNESSES: None.

INTELLECT:

LEVEL OF EDUCATION: High school diploma.

LANGUAGES SPOKEN: Fluent in both English and Russian, but English is her first language. She also can have conversational French. Conversational Tagalog also.

LEVEL OF SELF-ESTEEM: It had taken a while for Scarlett to be comfortable in her own skin, just because her entire life she was told by her mother that she was never good enough, never pretty enough, or smart enough. As she continued to build her business, slept around with as many people as she desired, her confidence grew. People tell her she’s beautiful, and she never disagrees.

GIFTS/TALENTS: Public speaking, flattering, styling and outfitting someone. Pretending her parents don’t exist.

MATHEMATICAL?: NOPE. The only time she’s mathematical is when she’s figuring out how much she’ll save on a sale.

MAKES DECISIONS BASED MOSTLY ON EMOTIONS, OR ON LOGIC?: Both, I wanna say. Scarlett can be impulsive and controlling at times, but that’s driven by anger, irritation and lust. She usually cuts off most emotions when it comes to people.

LIFE PHILOSOPHY: When you don’t have your shit together, you have to dress like you do.

RELIGIOUS STANCE: She was raised Jewish but she’s not particularly religious.

CAUTIOUS OR DARING?: Daring.

MOST SENSITIVE ABOUT/VULNERABLE TO: Her childhood. Having moved across the country where hardly anyone knew her at the age of eighteen, it was a chance to have a fresh start.

OPTIMIST OR PESSIMIST?: Pessimist.

EXTROVERT OR INTROVERT?: Extrovert.

RELATIONSHIPS:

CURRENT RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single.

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: Bisexual.

PAST RELATIONSHIPS: ( cancer tw, death tw)Scarlett has only ever had one serious relationship when she was 25. He was the definition of the perfect boyfriend, everything she thought she should want but nothing seemed right. Two years into their relationship, he proposed and impulsively she accepted believing she was in love with him. Just days later she regretted her decision. Thinking she would catch wedding fever, she stuck to the engagement and continued to plan out the wedding but emotionally became distant from her fiance. A year into their engagement they were married, and just six months after they finally wed, she decided she was going to divorce him. She met with an attorney and was near ready to serve the papers when he told her he was diagnosed with stage four lung cancer. He fought for 7 months. She’s harbored a substantial amount of guilt knowing that as he was dying, she wanted to leave him.

Nothing else is worth mentioning. She usually keeps her relationships casual, hardly sleeps with anyone more than twice, and even that’s pushing it.

PRIMARY REASON FOR BEING BROKEN UP WITH: Emotionally distant, doesn’t want another serious relationship.

PRIMARY REASONS FOR BREAKING UP WITH PEOPLE: Doesn’t want a serious relationship.

EVER CHEATED?: No, not at all. She would never do that to someone because she saw the damage her father did from his multiple affairs.

BEEN CHEATED ON: No. Other than her three year relationship, she hasn’t been in a relationship serious enough for it to get to that point.

LEVEL OF SEXUAL EXPERIENCE: She doesn’t date, but she frequently has one night stands.

STORY OF FIRST KISS: Her first kiss was with her best friend in 8th grade during a sleepover when she suggested that they should kiss since Scarlett said she was bored.

STORY OF LOSS OF VIRGINITY: It’s nothing exciting. In fact, it’s quite cliche which she hates. She lost her virginity the night of Junior Prom with a guy she had AP Bio with.

A SOCIAL PERSON?: Superficially, yes, but he’s very particular with who he deems as a close friend.

MOST COMFORTABLE AROUND: A bottle of red wine.

OLDEST FRIEND: CONNECTION OPEN.

HOW DOES HE THINK OTHERS PERCEIVE HER?: Charismatic, witty, beautiful.

HOW DO OTHERS ACTUALLY PERCEIVE HER?: Brutal, pretentious, beautiful

SECRETS:

LIFE GOALS: Still up in the air.

DREAMS: To be a stylist on a Hollywood-type of level.

GREATEST FEARS: Not living an exciting life/growing complacent.

MOST ASHAMED OF: Her parents.

CRIMES COMMITTED (WAS HE CAUGHT? CHARGED?): Underage drinking, but I mean, lmao. She also stole a pair of shoes from a department store when she was 14, but was never caught.

DETAILS/QUIRKS:

NIGHT OWL OR EARLY BIRD?: Night Owl.

LIGHT OR HEAVY SLEEPER?: Heavy sleeper.

FAVORITE ANIMAL: Eh.

FAVORITE FOOD: Sinigang and rice. Half of her childhood consisted of her learning how to make Filipino dishes because of who she lived with.

LEAST FAVORITE FOOD: Highkey salad. Highkey, anything vegan.

FAVORITE BOOK: Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead by Sheryl Sandberg

LEAST FAVORITE BOOK: Doesn’t care enough to have a least favorite book.

FAVORITE MOVIE: She’ll say Roman Holiday but it’s really Terms of Endearment.

LEAST FAVORITE MOVIE: The Notebook.

FAVORITE SONG: Linger by The Cranberries but anything by Barry White. She loves Motown.

FAVORITE SPORT: She loves basketball and is biased toward the Golden State Warriors.

COFFEE OR TEA?: Wine. But coffee, yeah.

CRUNCHY OR SMOOTH PEANUT BUTTER?: Crunchy.

TYPE OF CAR HE DRIVES: Silver Rolls Royce.

LEFTY OR RIGHTY?: Right-handed.

FAVORITE COLOR: Burgundy.

CUSSER?: All the time.

SMOKER? DRINKER? DRUG USER?: She used to smoke, but quit after she ended her engagement. But yes, drinker. Loves to drink. It’s her favorite hobby.

BIGGEST REGRET: Letting her marriage go on for too long.

PETS: None.

[mittensmorgul]

Hello Mittens :) Do you think the 300th ep painted John in a more positive light than it should have? I don't really hate John, but I felt like they brushed past a lot of trauma he caused Sam and Dean for the sake of a reunion episode. I know that trauma wasn't forgotten, since it was intentionally brought up right before the 300th ep. I'm just kinda curious why they didn't address that kind of raw trauma we've seen before directly with John

Eh... maybe taken out of context of the rest of the season, or just looking at the scenes with John out of context with the rest of the episode, it could look like they were handwaving the sorts of trauma that we’ve watched Sam and Dean suffer through for the last 14 seasons, but there’s your answer right there.

We have been watching Sam and Dean struggle with the legacy their father left them with for the last 14 seasons. We aren’t watching these few minutes of conversation in a vacuum. We didn’t just jump right from 2.01 to 2.22 to 14.13 with nothing in between.

Sam and Dean have both repeatedly addressed how they were raised, how much it sucked, what their relationship with their father was like (both awful and good, because their lives weren’t 24/7 awful, you know?). They’ve both come to a greater understanding of their father now that they’re adults themselves that have had to face horrors that even John could’ve never conceived of when he was alive (how many apocalypses? being chosen personally by God for this horrific destiny? And even John and Mary having been mere pawns in this longer cosmic game being played with their lives?). I mean, Sam and Dean Know Things About Things.

They met God. And Dean shared his disappointment in the ultimate cosmic father figure, who then advised Dean not to conflate him with his own father. Basically hung a lampshade on that parallel for all of us.

Then there was Mary’s return, her uncovering the truth of all of this, the horror that she hadn’t been able to save her children from the life she never wanted for them, and that John had been the one to drive them through that terrible life. She was disillusioned, guilt-ridden, and horrified at the way her kids were raised. But she also still did miss him, you know?

People can actually feel a complex mix of feelings for each other. And given one final chance, knowing full well it is their one final chance, they can choose-- as Dean said in 14.05-- to lay their baggage down.

We also can’t forget the direct parallel we were given in the previous episode, of Nick having this chance to reconcile with the ghost of his wife, to free her from imprisonment in their old house suffering the death of their child alone, and he failed to do that. He chose Lucifer and himself over her. While in the very next episode, John was sort of presented with a similar circumstance. He immediately and without hesitation chose again to sacrifice himself for Mary. He didn’t even have to think about it. And in turn, he had to accept Sam and Dean’s lives over the last 13 years since he died, and his role in the traumas of their shared past that shaped them and led directly to a lot of their personal suffering as children and adults. But there was also general acknowledgement-- especially from Dean-- that he likes the person he’s become despite all that. And that he wouldn’t change it now.

They chose to lay the baggage of the past down, to not dwell on the past that they can’t change, and chose the future instead.

And from an “outside the story” perspective, they’ve finally laid the character of John to rest. It’s honestly a relief to me, because yes he fucked up their lives. We get it. We’ve been getting that for 14 years now. Let’s try to grow beyond that now. He’s gone, they can’t change the past, but they can acknowledge it and move forward with a healthier mindset about all of it now.

Because the episode wasn’t about JOHN. It was about how far Sam and Dean (and even Mary, now that she’s alive again, and even CAS in his role in the story brought to the future from a point in time where he’d never met the Winchesters and fell for humanity) have come since then. And they’re not in the same place they were back in early s2 after John’s death, you know? They’d long since exhausted the desire to yell in his face. I mean, Dean confronted this directly in s3. How long should he be expected to have held on to all those toxic feelings? Because honestly if they’d all started yelling it would’ve just been... the grumpy toddler poop flinging hour, and I really expect more of all of them after all these years, you know?

Fandom may not have forgiven John, but thank heck Sam and Dean have at least gained some perspective and learned that he doesn’t still have to dictate their lives to them 13 years after he died, you know? Good for them for actually maturing to this point where they can see a future for themselves not burdened by toxic feelings that they’ve been working through all along the way.

eek, sorry about that... I’ve just got a lot of feelings rooted in the long context of watching Sam and Dean struggle with their childhood memories, with their lives as John’s little soldiers, and everything they’ve learned in the intervening years that have actually contextualized the suffering they endured. They’ve learned it wasn’t all entirely John’s Terrible Parenting, and that even he was manipulated by cosmic nonsense into the situation they were raised in. I mean, yeah, they’re not blind to the specific choices HE made along the way in reaction to the cosmic nonsense, and it’s not like they’re just forgiving him for all the terrible things he did to them, but heck, they are actually seeing the bigger picture here, and John’s part in it all is so far in the past for them as to be easier than they ever imagined it could be to set that bag down and walk forward down the road now, you know?

The one I’m actually concerned for is Mary, because for her it’s only about two and a half years out beyond where she learned John was dead, and she hasn’t had an entire lifetime to deal with this yet like Sam and Dean have. Plus she just got another cosmic screw-over. For John it may have been an easy choice to go back to his life where she’d died decades ago, if it meant that Sam and Dean could someday get their mom back. But for Mary? She had the wound of John’s loss reopened just as it was beginning to heal over and now suddenly she feels that pain fresh again. Because if it weren’t for her, would dean and Sam have chosen to keep their wish, with their alternate lives, if it meant having John back? I mean, no I don’t think they would’ve, but the wish would only allow them to have one or the other, not both, which meant she would lose John all over again.

And heck, isn’t that what Bobby said back in 5.15 when he was losing hope for stopping the apocalypse? When he had to kill Karen again?

DEAN: Hey, look, I don't know squat from shinola about love, but... At least you got to spend five days with her, right?BOBBY: Right. Which makes things about a thousand times worse. She was the love of my life. How many times do I got to kill her?

And I can only assume that’s about how Mary feels right at that moment. Because maybe she didn’t kill John directly, but the cosmic joke makes her the indirect reason for his death in 2.01 (her deal with Azazel come back around), and her very existence was the reason he went back in time to suffer that same fate again. Owwww.

So, no, I don’t think they brushed past this trauma for the sake of a reunion episode. Because I have context of the entire last 14 seasons of the show telling me otherwise.

[witch-of-letters]

WITIWNU - Part 1/?

Chapter Word Count: 2865

A/N #1: Once again a HUGE ‘Thank you’ to my wonderful Beta (who so generously offered to help me with this) - @team-free-will-you-idjits-67  ! I’m forever grateful for your help.

A/N #2: I took the liberty to use some actual dialogues (but changed them for the story’s purposes) from the last episode of season 10 (found on supernaturalwiki.com, if anyone’s curious).

A/N #3: Program used for the collage is Befunky Collage Maker

Theme song: “Bad Dream” by Ruelle

And don’t forget to write a comment/send a feedback. That’s what keeps me going!

Chapter Links:   (Prologue)  , Chapter 2

“How much longer till we make it?” inquired Dean. The drive was getting too long indeed. Putting up your pointing finger, you pulled out your phone to access Google Maps.

“About 30 or so kilometres,” you answered in a calm manner. You’ve been in the United States for fifteen years, and yet, you’re still refusing to use American terminology.

“English, please.”

“About 19 miles,” you sighed, “Not too far now.”

*****

“I know I’ve already asked you this, but are you sure this is the right way? You going out like this?” After the Mark was transferred over to you, he became more adamant about getting rid of it. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at his behaviour, because after all, you did warn him about the consequences ofbecoming its new host.

“The words I’m about to say sound so usual right now, but I have to do it, Dean. There is another way to lose it, there always is, but it’s not an option right now. Not if we want even more problems upon our shoulders,” you tried to convene how hopeless the current situation was. There was so much you didn’t want to deal with…

“What do you mean? What way?!” he said with a clear note of hope in his voice. Hope, that you wouldn’t have to die or be sealed away forever for the mistake that wasn’t yours to begin with.

You hesitated to tell him the truth. This had to be done by Sam and him alone, even if you were best friends, who always had each other’s back. You knew that his plan would work, but you didn’t trust Rowena to keep her end of the bargain. You knew she would run away with The Book of The Damned the moment the spell was done and over with.

Dean looked at you again. He saw how your lips were moving a little, a clear sign of hesitation, and wanted to know what was on your mind. Would the answer frighten him or anger him even further? In that case, he would rather not know anything. He still felt the pang of an almost unbearable guilt for making you, the woman he loved with all his being, become the martyr instead of him.

“The Book of The Damned,” was your final answer. When you looked at Dean, you saw his jaw clench. Sam was in deep trouble now because Dean explicitly told him not to use that damn thing, no pun intended.

“Damn it!” he punched the steering wheel, making the car swerve a little. There was no surprise there. “I told him to burn that thing to ashes! What was he thinking?!” You put your hand on his shoulder, squeezing it in reassurance.

“He and Cas thought there were no other alternatives, at least none that would leave either you or me alive, that is. And now Sam’s doing everything he can to remove it from me,” you sighed once more,”And to be honest, when I told him not to come looking for me, to leave me alone, he actually looked at me as though I was ripping away his heart. I just couldn’t stand seeing him so devastated.” You quickly blinked your eyes to stop your own tears from falling.

Dean was quick to question you back.”And what about me? Why did you bring me along?” he looked at you in sadness, still hoping you wouldn’t leave him.

“Because we’re both in it. Because we’ve both been under the Mark’s influence. Because I love you too much to just leave without any explanation,” you spoke the last part quietly.”Besides,” you jokingly huffed,”you would try following me into death anyway, and I won’t let you do it. Not if I can help it.” Instead of squirming under your gaze, he bravely faced you, silently telling you that he would not back down from his promise. The rest of your ride was filled with silence.

*****

After a while, you finally arrived at your destination. What looked like an abandoned bar was actually the one that Death loved most - at least back when  people used to go for drinks there. Strangely enough though, the lights were still lit. ‘Huh. Perhaps they’ve been working nonstop since the owner of this place left. Doesn’t look like it was done in a hurry…’ you thought as you walked out of the car, Dean behind you in tow.

“Oi, where are you going?! Who’s going to bring the ingredients inside?! Me alone?!” you motioned to Baby. He rolled his eyes in response but didn’t object in any way.

When you stepped inside, you were met with death-like silence, no pun intended. The place didn’t look or feel eerie though, so you focused only on preparing to summon Death. Before you could begin, you texted Sam to ask about the progress on the Book. Hopefully, it would take awhile for Dean to gather all the things needed for the spell.

You: What’s the progress, Sam? Is everything alright?

He replied immediately.

Sam: We’re fine. We barely managed to get Rowena to agree to perform the spell.

You: What did she ask from you? No, let me guess - she wants The Book of the Damned. How obvious.

Sam: Yes, but not just that. She also wants Nadya’s Codex...and freedom.

You: Of course. She wouldn’t be able to perform the spells, otherwise. As for the other thing - let her walk free. Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t want her roaming around freely and doing God knows what, but right now I don’t care about her wants and needs. I know that there’ll be repercussions for this but we’ll deal with them later, just like we always do.

Sam: I’m not even sure what we’re doing is the right thing...but I have no other solutions to offer.

You: There aren’t any. Not ones that wouldn’t turn the world upside down. But there is something bad about it still.

You glanced outside. Dean was still rummaging through the trunk.

Sam: What is it?

You: You remember what I told you about the Mark when Dean was planning to fight Metatron? The Mark is both a lock and a key. Take away one or both, and what happens, Sammy?

Sam:...We’ll unleash something, and it’s not going to be anything good.

You: You catch on quick. It was made by God for a reason - a reason that we don’t know, but it can’t be anything good like you just said. I have a feeling what that might be but I’m not certain.

Sam: We’ll figure something out, Y/N/N. We will.

You: Sure. Now, let me get back to my plan A.

Sam: Wait, what plan A?!

You put your phone away. You didn’t want to tell anything to him, in case that plan went wrong. You were 99% sure it would.

*****

When Dean finally brought everything inside, even the homemade Mexican food, you started drawing a pentagram. Having placed and lit all five candles, you put every ingredient into the metal bowl, chanting the spell all the way. To put a ‘final touch’ to it, Dean lit up a match and threw it into the bowl, ingredients lighting up immediately.

“Well, well, well, I always figured you to be the most sensible one, Miss Ryder. Have you finally considered my proposal?” Death motioned to the Mark on your arm. You looked at it. It was calm, at least for now. “Oh, and is that queso I see?” Dean stepped forward with the tray in his hands.

“Yeah - yes. Homemade by yours truly. All with the bad fat,” he sniffed the food. Normally, you were into spicy food, but right now, you wanted to get this thing over with.

“Consider it an offering,” you walked forward silently. Dean looked at you confusedly.

“For?” he asked. You looked at Death dead in the eye.

“For him to kill me.”

*****

Death picked up a taquito from the tray, now laying on a table nearby. From the way he was munching upon it, he liked the way it tasted. Dean’s always been a good cook, even if he always liked to downplay his cooking skills.

“Wait, what?! Kill you?!” Dean stared at you incredulously, as though you’ve just done the worst thing you could possibly do, and in a way, you did. Death turned his calm gaze towards him, not even bothering to lift up his eyebrows.

“Yes, that’s what I proposed to do,” he looked at you again,”but you’ve twisted my words a little, my dear. I offered to seal you away. That Mark on your arm is the First Curse - nothing can kill you.”

“So you’re saying that you can’t get rid of it. I get it.”

“Actually, I could,” Death put the food away.

“But…”

“Creatio ex nihilo - God created the earth out of nothing - or so your Sunday-school teacher would have you believe.” Death half scoffed at the misinterpretation through religion.

“What, so Genesis is a lie, eh? Shocker,” jabbed in Dean. For a moment, you almost forgot he was there. Death stood up.

“Before there was light, before there was God and the archangels, there wasn't nothing. There was the Darkness, a horribly destructive, amoral force that was beaten back by God and his archangels in a terrible war,” he walked closer to Dean,”God locked the Darkness away where it could do no harm, and he created a Mark that would serve as both lock and key, which he entrusted to his most valued Lieutenant, Lucifer. But the Mark began to assert its own will, revealed itself as a curse, and began to corrupt. Lucifer became jealous of man. God banished Lucifer to Hell. Lucifer passed the Mark to Cain, who passed the Mark to you, the proverbial finger in the dike,” Death finished the last line in Dean’s face, his stare intense. You gasped.

“I knew it! I knew the Mark had a very dark energy about it! This just confirms everything!” You started pacing around the room.

Dean sat down,”Well, that is just fan-friggin-tastic, isn't it?”

“So I could remove the Mark, but only if it is shared with another…to ensure that the lock remains unbroken and the Darkness remains banned.” You turned around and raised an eyebrow.

“But we’ve already done so. Haven’t you noticed?” You pointed at your arm.

“Hmmm, what if I told you I could relocate you somewhere far away, not even on this earth, where you would still be alive, but no longer a danger to yourself or to others?”

Suddenly, Sam entered the bar, looking like he’s been running all the way there. Confusion was clear on all your faces.

“What is this?” Dean stepped forward.

“We need to talk.”

Sam walked towards you with his hand stretched out,”Whatever you are thinking of doing, don't. There is another way. You don't need to go with him. You don't need to die!”

After hearing about Death’s proposal to the Mark issue, he continued,“So, what? He's gonna... Gonna send you into outer space? Is that it?” You sighed heavily. This wasn’t going to be easy to explain. Thankfully, Dean took the conversation over from you.

“No, well, he didn't say outer space.”

“This is madness, Dean!”

“You think I don’t know that, Sam?! Of course, it’s madness for her to get sealed away because of what I’ve done!” Dean angrily brushed his hand through his hair.

“Far from it, I'm afraid,” spoke up Death. Sam looked at him coldly.

“No one's asking you,” Walking up to him, you placed your hand on his forearm.

“Hear him out! Please.”

*****

“Our conundrum is simple, Sam. Your friend cannot be killed, and the Mark cannot be destroyed, not without inciting a far greater evil than any of us have ever known.”

“What evil?” he quietly asked.

“The Darkness.”

“What the hell is that?”

“Well, what does it sound like?” Dean inquired,“Does it sound like a good thing?” All three of you looked at Death, waiting for his answer.

“Even if I remove Y/N from the playing field, we're still left with you two, loyal, dogged Sam and Dean Winchester, who I suspect will never rest until they set their friend free – will never rest until their friend is free of the Mark, which simply cannot happen, lest the Darkness be set free. Then there was that time you stood me up.” He walked closer to the brothers until he was standing right in front of them. Sam turned to you.

“You traded our lives.” Hurt was etched into Sam’s face, causing your own heart to break.  

You refused to look sad in front of Death as you spoke to Sam,“I never wanted to do that in the first place, but what other choice do I-we have, Sam? I'm willing to live with this thing forever, as long as I know that I and it will never hurt another living being.”

“This isn't you, Y/N. This doesn't make any sense.”

“No, it makes perfect sense if you stop thinking about yourself for one damn minute!” You retorted, causing the Mark to flare up immediately.

“It's for the greater good. Once you consider that, this makes all the sense in the world.” Death was quick to remind you of his presence,”But now...we have this little meeting to finish,” he summoned his scythe, the blade’s edge shining in the dim light. You looked at it uneasily, dread filling up your stomach.

“What are you going to with it?”

He looked at you in surprise, figuring you understood the underlying meaning of his little speech earlier. “Why, kill those two, of course!” The brothers’ backs straightened. Your face contorted in shock and anger.

“What?! No! You don’t have to kill them - just teleport them outside this place!” If it were possible, you were sure Death would have yawned.

“My dear, they are men in love,” he explained,”they would stop at nothing to bring you back. I’ve seen that look before, countless of times.” You turned to look at the brothers, silently raising an eyebrow in question. While Dean wore a mask of shock on his face, clearly surprised by Death’s revelation, Sam, on the other hand, looked guilty and embarrassed. “He’s never once told you of his feelings for you, and why would he? He saw how happy his brother was with you. And so I need to take care of the issue,” Death ran his thumb along the sharp blade before whirling it to an attack position.

In your panic, you let the magic flow from you, the scythe momentarily appearing in your hands. Death was not amused by that.

“Now now, Miss Ryder, please return it to me.” You gripped the scythe firmly in your hands and whirled it a little yourself.

“And why would I do that, exactly? So that you can cut them in pieces? Oh, hell no!” Both of them looked at you in worry, ready to step in, if necessary.

“This is getting more than intolerable,” Death’s face turned into a sneer, which would frighten anyone that came across him. He lunged at you, but before he could reach you, you stabbed him with the blade. He looked at you in mild shock, not having expected you to do that. Same with the Winchesters.

You, on the other hand, looked horrified.

******

“You okay?” asked Dean cautiously, as you were still holding Death’s scythe. Realising he was speaking to you, you dropped the blade. You felt like it would actually sting you if you held it longer.

“Does it look like I’m okay?” you spoke resignedly,”The whole plan just went to Hell in a handbasket!” You flipped over a table in frustration. The moment Death turned to ashes, you felt your heart stop. His death wasn’t that shocking to you, but the mere failure of your plan was. Suddenly, you heard a shrieking sound from outside.

“Wait, guys, do you hear that?”

“What?” said Sam. All of a sudden, a red lightning bolt crashed through the roof, stricking your forearm.  Both your arm and the Mark glowed red as itcrackled until the Mark faded away from your skin. Then the lightning flew back the way it came just as suddenly.

“What. The. Hell. Was. That?” Sam brought you into a tight hug.

“This is good. Y/N, this is good. The -- the Mark is off your arm. Nothing crazy happened.”

“Yet. You mean yet.” Before Sam could reply, Dean pointed at the dark cloud moving towards you.

“I think we need to go. Now.” With that, you ran out of the bar, and jumped into Baby. Just as you tried to outrun that thing, the car hit a blasted pothole, making it impossible to drive. You all watch incredulously as the cloud roars towards you for several seconds, before enveloping the car in the darkness.

“Sam?”

“Dean?!

“Y/N!”

The last thing you heard before losing consciousness was a female voice speaking through the darkness.

“Hello, my saviour. I’ve been waiting such a long time to be free.”

WIHIWNU Taglist (feel free to send an ask for me to add/remove you from it): @curly-haired-disaster // @ain-t-bovvered // @coffee-obsessed-writer // @waywardrose13 // @waywardnerd67 // @impala-dreamer // @emptywithout // @undertastic-dork // @carryonmywaywardwriters // @angelkurenai // @supernaturalfreewill // @nakkisalmiakki // @team-free-will-you-idjits-67 // @queen-of-deans-booty // @luciferssugarbabygirl // @spnhollis // @cherry3point14

[i-d0nt-even-kn0w]

SPN Season 14 (and a little bit of 12 and 13) Critiques

Listen, I dislike when people hate new seasons of a show just because “the old ones were better” with no actual excuse, so I hope this post does not get perceived that way, but Supernatural’s writing and directing has decayed over the last few years, and season 14 episode 1 really just did it for me. I tried to ignore season 12′s mess of a storyline because the new characters were well done (in my opinion, of course--and Mary is excluded from this because although the actress is wonderful, I cannot get into her being back in the story for over a season. I’ll go more into that later), and season 13 had Gabriel and Rowena to pull me through the alternate universe plot and Jack who--as I’ll go into later--was another big punch in SPN’s writing integrity, but this one episode from 14 literally had me in shock.

So, with no more introduction, the list of critiques I have based of season 14′s ONE episode. I may pull in a bit of 12 and 13 too because they are where a lot of the issues started. There will be some things I liked about the episode too! But very little lol.

Spoilers ahead! Also opinions ahead--feel free to disagree with me, and I actually would really like to see what other people think! 

1. Filmography

That fight scene in the bar says it all. There have been some god awful editing of the footage since 13 (that Michael blue eyes zoom in at the end of 13? Unless they were trying to make a thriller joke, it was wack), but this one episode, like I said before, sent me into shock. The zoom ins, the shaky camera filming like we’re in the Office, the out of place music that does not really fit the Supernatural theme--I could go on. That fight scene had flashing lights, zoom ins, and more jump-cuts than a youtube video to the point we’re I had no idea what was going on. My brother watching with me literally was speechless for the entire fight, which felt like an eternity.

It felt dramatized in a Riverdale way. No shade to Riverdale, obviously, because that works for that show. But in Supernatural? It’s the Teen Titans Go effect--popular shows on a network influence older shows and, in my opinion, make those shows worse as a result. This leaks into my number 2...

2. Theme

It’s the 100. The theme is the 100. The show is the 100. (This is a joke I have never watched the 100, but when did Supernatural adopt a dystopia mood for their show?)

3. Wait a minute....... Who ARE you?

The centric theme of Supernatural is family and freewill. Sam and Dean are supposed to constantly be the centers of the show, but exceptions are made, and often have been really well done. I thought Bitten was a great episode, and episodes where Sam and Dean are separated are also a great way to look at the brothers from a different viewpoint. Even if you didn’t like Bitten or those type of episodes, however, that was okay. Why? Because they were one off episodes, if not maybe two or three. Dean being gone is fresh, and could be done well, but when the centric theme of family, aka people Sam and Dean trust and love like Cas, Bobby, Jo, Ellen, etc, is suddenly ruptured by extras (that are usually super fun in a one-off hunting episode, maybe a reoccurrence now and then) becoming apart of the brother’s daily life and the viewer’s weekly watching, it’s uncomfortable. Not because I or others hate change, but because it goes against a major theme of supernatural. Dean, Sam, and Cas are suddenly extremely close to people they don’t necessarily consider family, and that is very odd for the show.

In case you cannot tell, I care a lot about Supernatural’s themes. I don’t care if they shake things up, but the show’s values are important. They need to stick to them for it to be, well, Supernatural.

4. Not-Bobby and Mary

If they become canon, I’ll actually sink into the pit. You can pair together whoever you want--this one is very much so just an opinion. But in terms of writing, this just comes off as so wrong for many reasons. Maybe it’s because neither of them should be on earth in the first place.

Mary was such a wonderful and powerful character. Then they brought her back to life, which drained meaning out of her. She could have had a realization she does not belong on earth and go back to heaven at the end of 12, which would give Sam and Dean closure and actually be kinda nice. But nope. She’s still here. And what’s the point if the only available female character isn’t dating someone????? (she said, sarcastically)

Not-Bobby is just a way to keep Jim Beaver around, which yeah I get it i love him too, but why not just have some episodes like where Bobby helped the boys from heaven. That was fun. That was also real Bobby. If we were going to have Not-Bobby, I would at least like him to establish what Not-Charlie established (I liked her so much more)--they are not who the Winchesters knew in their universe. Not-Bobby gives off too much of an actual Bobby feel, and God knows I don’t want actual Bobby and Mary together... eeeee...

5. The alternate universe plot-line sucks in the context of Supernatural as a show

Speaks for itself.

6. Jack

Fellas. I’ll get hate for this (if anyone reads this, lol), but he’s a bad character.

He’s fan-service. Fan-service isn’t always bad, mind you, but it is when that is the bases for the character. A cute, younger boy (back to the Riverdale/the 100 teen drama throw in a more adult-centered show) who is reminiscent of all the things fans loved about quirky Castiel back in seasons 4 and 5. Jack was super over powered too, which made me struggle all throughout season 13 to not hate his character for what was just a writing death sentence. Now that he doesn’t have powers they’re finally trying to give him... depth? Pro tip: If it takes a whole season to give a character depth, it’s bad writing.

I’ll admit, though--I do love the dad Sam scenes. Not too much the dad Cas scenes because they’re often poorly written and unlike Cas imo. But eh.

Jack is like an OC. Sounds fun until put into practice.

Why couldn’t they have just... not killed Kevin and had him be the son-character he already was to the boys? Or not kill Charlie and let her be the little-sibling character she was to the boys? Why couldn’t either of those two very important characters become titular main characters instantly after being introduced, like Jack was? Maybe because they’re not white or a dude, respectively? Or because the show didn’t need to fill in the hole Mark Sheppard left for a main character until now? Hmm... 

In all realness, Jack is just too poorly written in my eyes to like, but I know people totally love him so please know that’s valid and I get it. I do love the actor, so there’s that.

7. Maggie

WHY DID SHE COME ALONG ON THE TRIP?? SHE COULDN’T USE A BLADE, BUT THEY PICKED HER TO COME ALONG?

I get the quirky humor, but SURELY there were other capable people they could have asked. Maggie is cute, but a throwaway for humor. I was trying to like her because, again, the actress was great and I love some comedy, but not at the expense of reason.

Also, again, no offense but I cannot deal with the parallel universe people and the storyline in general.

Now for some positives mixed with negatives!

8. Nick

Ohhhh boy. Nick could be the one good thing about this season IF they do not make it a “it was me, Lucifer all along!” cheap shot (which I know they will do, hence the negative). I think it would be a bigger plot twist if Nick WASN’T Lucifer. Sam could bond with a guy who went exactly through what he went through, we could have an established character back instead of these random new ones (like the vampire Michael brought in at the end with no context... like, I put Supernatural higher above other drama shows because it actually establishes a character and who they are before making them apart of the plot, like Gabriel being the janitor before he was the trickster, and the trickster before he was Gabriel. Cheap introductions with dramatic music in the background? Pass). 

I wanted Missouri back, she died. I wanted Gabriel back, he died. Nick will either be Lucifer or die, but I will cling onto every good old character there is until there are none left. There are good new characters too, sometimes, but they keep dying too (Eileen) so miss me with that argument.

Also there’s no way Nick could have survived. Jimmy died, why wouldn’t he? It’s Lucifer, but if it wasn’t? It’d be better. And also this totally is another cheap shot to keep Mark in the show, like with Jim. I love Mark, but we all know it.

9. Kip

I was SO pissed for most of the episode, because I thought that the show was actually trying to replace Crowley (you know the writing is bad when you expect SPN to pull something like that). I actually LOVED it when that show was self-aware and Kip was actually putting on a show--TRYING to be Crowley but miserably failing and being a pathetic knock-off. It was good, it was interesting, I was ready for the plot-line of Crowley’s irreplaceableness and how demons would deal with it.

But Kip died. Why wasn’t Asmodeus’ death that quick? He was an actual poorly written villain with nothing interesting to him.

In conclusion, this is why I nearly died watching the first episode of season 14. Will I stop watching? Not yet. SPN is a show I have loved since I was little--I watched it with my big sister, and now my little brother watches it with me. Does that mean the show is still good? In my opinion... no. 

I think the writers should stop pandering to the audience so much. I watched “Live Free Or Twi-Hard” after 14x01 to wash my eyes out with old SPN, and I remembered how much the show used to laugh at over-done trends. SPN was different and fun because it didn’t care, it did what the creators wanted, and it worked. It doesn’t feel like that any more. The show made fun of Twilight in that episode, yet “Wayward Sisters” had total Vampire Diaries narration (no offense to the pilot, but I have to admit... I didn’t like it. It could definitely be a good stand-alone show, and I did want it to be picked up, but it was completely out of place in Supernatural as a show. Again, because of the themes and shameless pandering to the teen audience).

Supernatural fans fell in love with Supernatural, not a teen CW drama. That does not mean fans can’t love those too--love all the TV teen dramas you want, I like those shows too--but the tropes for those type of shows fits in those type of shows. I can admit Supernatural is not a masterpiece, and it is a drama, but it’s not what they show has become now. And 14x01 makes that perfectly clear.

But that’s just my opinion, a Supernatural opinion! Thanks for reading!

[bunnymcbunnister]

SPN Season 15 Spoiler Sheet, update 10/3

Lots and lots of updates abound. I took out some old general stuff because this monster is huge (but it will only get shorter, sniff sniff) Spoilery goodness under the cut. 

DISCLAIMER: This is gathered info from various sources. This is not confirmed information. Stuff in this WILL be wrong. Don’t take this too seriously. This is for fun. Also, if you use this info for another publication, please let me know as a courtesy. Don’t be a dick. It's all out there, but it hurts to see my same phrasing on other publications after all the work I’ve done to consolidate it…  

General Info (oldest to newest). This is a blend of pre-COVID and post COVID, so some might change. 

In an interview, Kripe indicated that the series ending would have “peace” for Sam and Dean

Misha will be in 15 out of 20 episodes this season (he’s missed 3 so far and I suspect will miss 14. Unclear about 16, 19, and 20). 

Dean and Amara’s connection will be explored

JaxCon/Vegas Con spoilers: 

Misha said the ending was “happier than he expected” but also had some sadness. He later used “sad and redemptive”

Misha mentioned that Claire will be mentioned on the show, but as of yet not appear. 

Dean says the line “stop killing my people” (to god?)

Jensen said he doesn’t see how the story could continue past this season, but Jared said its more of “a see you later”

Al Cal posted a pic of a “thrown away” call sheet that seem to indicate Micheal, Lucifer, and a character named “Betty” interacting in the bunker. Unclear as to the validity, could be from 19 based on casting 

Charlie (original flavor) will return

Filming resumed on Aug 18th. Per Canadian policy, they must quarantine for two weeks. Those quarantining seemed to include:

Fairly Clear: Jared, Jensen, Jake Abel (Micheal), Rob Benedict (Chuck/God) Mark Pelligrino (Lucifer), Al Cal (didn't need to quarantine, but he is definitely on set), Jim Beaver (Bobby)

Unclear/Rumored: Misha (he is being deliberately cagey), Osric Chau (Kevin- but likely for another project, he was a week ahead of everyone else)

Reasons Unlikely: Sam Smith (chemo treatment), Kim Rhodes (working at a camp during quarantine), Ruth Connell (posted from Malibu the entire time)

No idea: Shoshannah Stern 

Jensen said sp 19 is more of a season finale, while 20 is a series finale. Repeated in interviews/livestreams. 

Megan Fitz. complimented both Dabb’s and Glynn’s writing on twitter. Not sure if it is in reference to rewrites or the special retrospective that is planned. 

Jensen indicated that the ending did change per COVID protocols. Later interviews (Variety) confirmed this, but it seemed to indicate the changes were in regards to how many people filmed at once (crowd scenes, recurring characters returning)

Misha is being very, very cagey about where he was. Some live streams seem to indicate he is not at home, but he has yet to confirm- his presence in 19/20 is hard to track. In an interview with Metaverse, he was in bed in a hotel looking space and you could see mountains in the background. He was not on set for the first week of filming, so he could be a week behind. 

Misha has thrown around the words “final”  and “what he <Misha> would have wanted” per Cas’ ending. “Sad/Proud” and “poignant” were also used. His latest line is “sad but satisfying”

The final episodes will premier October 8th. The finale will air Nov 19th in conjunction with an hour long special. 

Dabb confirmed to TV line the episode 19/20 explanation Jensen’s mentioned- For the most part, we wrap up a big chunk of our mythology in Episode 19,Episode 20 is more character-based and is more concerned with Sam, Dean and this family they’ve built around them than it is with figuring out the Case of the Week.

When talking about the lightheartedness of returning on ep 14, Dabb said deeply depressing and upsetting episodes are coming (USAToday). He also said we would see “new sides” of Jack, Cas, and Billie. A revisit of Chuck and Amara’s “sibling issues” as well is on tap. Jared said sacrifices are coming. 

From TV Line-  re the battle with Chuck. Allies will return, buit was repeated several times in the article that is comes down to Sam and Dean. Jack will struggle with getting his soul back but will be helped by Cas.

It was confirmed there will be no appearances by mamma and papa Winchester, possible due to COVID. (TVLine)

A trailer was released on 8/27. Scenes included:

A moving speech from Sam to Dean

(Possibly from 18) A teary conversation between Dean and Cas

Injured Dean being helped by Cas in the bunker

Jack breaking some cuffs/bring thrown into a wall/saying he has to kill god

Dean and his grenade launcher and a purple nightgown 

Sam in a sweater vest getting a gun from under a pillow

A glimpse of a body with “Lust” written above it/a matronly woman (I think the villain from 14) saying “Boys”

Ghose Dean? Little Sam cutting off a hand

Some intermixed scenes from past episodes

https://youtu.be/d5AzUa5zABI

A second trailer was released on 8/31. Scenes included:

A monologue from Billie about god coming to destroy the planet plus her banging on a bunker door (with her hand all gooey) and striking someone with her scythe

Jack continuing his speech about killing god but expanding that he has a ritual to do

Lots of red danger lights in the bunker/ 3 people getting tossed around in the bunker/Chuck in the bunker

Chuck saying he doesn't believe Sam and Dean can kill him

Young Sam and not ghost Young dean

Dean angrily driving the Impala then saying “its time”

Cas drawing his blade in front of an old truck to protect someone in a suit (Jack? I can't tell)

More Dean tears

A surprise appearance from Bobby

Some of the same scenes as before

https://youtu.be/mBTwCWkOFKw

A third trailer was released on 9/24. It was a rehash of the other two, but a new new scenes included: 

A handcuffed Jack asking Dean if his plan will work, Dean cheekily replying, and swing a machete at the cuffs

More of Dean and his nightgown

Sam saying “it's our one shot”

A pair of werewolves/vampires?

https://youtu.be/7oVO9BdADnQ

A Shaving People, Punting Things trailer was released on 10/2. Scenes included:

Dean in a bar with a blond woman

Sam by the mountain lake with facial wounds

Sam in a birthday crown

Several scenes with Sam and Dean in a barn

Team Free Will 2.0 in  a bunker corridor, Jack looking injured (?)

Cas digging near a stop sign

Sam, Dean, and Jack walking down a street/later in a church/in the Impala

Sad Dean in the dungeon/Sad Sam drinking and knocking over a book

Sad Jack and Cas leaning on the Impala

Scattered shot of Sad Sam and Dean (drinking in the bunker, learning against the Impala)

Sam/Donna hug

Sad Jack on a bed

Dean entering a motel room

Amara looking blissful

Dean giving Sam an encouraging face pat

Billie choking Cas

Sam and Dean shooting/swinging machetes/knives

Glowing eye lady in the bunker

Sam and Dean getting thrown around the bunker

Sam in Death’s library, hurting

Billie swinging a scythe

A bunker door getting blown up

Many behind the scenes shots, including one of Felicia Day (Charlie)

https://youtu.be/yex3jbuf8Mo

Episode 15x14

Title: Last Holiday

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: MAKING UP FOR LOST TIME – Sam (Jared Padalecki) and Dean (Jensen Ackles) discover a wood nymph (guest star Meagan Fey) living in the bunker who is determined to protect her family, at any cost. Eduardo Sanchez directed the episode written by Jeremy Adams (#1514). Original airdate 3/30/2020.

Written by: Jeremy Adams

Director: Eduardo Sanchez

Filming Dates:1/15- 1/24

Airdate: unknown- October 8th

Photos: https://www.tvinsider.com/gallery/supernatural-returns-season-15-episode-14-last-holiday/

Promo: kind of lumped in with the other promos

Sneak Peak: https://www.instagram.com/tv/CF0HK1blaFU/?igshid=o2ffwvgud56j

Sneak Peak 2: https://www.usatoday.com/story/entertainment/tv/2020/10/07/final-supernatural-episodes-lead-climactic-amazing-showdown/3632212001/

Castiel ? eh… I don't think so Jack ? yes

Guest stars:  Meagen Fay (fae lady)

Other Spoilers/info:

Misha mentioned being at an airport the first day of filming, maybe he’ll miss this one

The director shared a BTS shot with AlCal’s chair in the background. He also posted on that looked like the statues in hell. Lots of filming at the bunker. A few impala shots were shared as well. 

In an EW article, “a mysterious woman gives Sam and Dean every holiday they ever missed”

Episode 15x15

Title: Gimme Shelter

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: MATT COHEN DIRECTS – Castiel (Misha Collins) and Jack (Alexander Calvert) work a case involving members of a local church. Meanwhile, Sam (Jared Padalecki) and Dean (Jensen Ackles) go off in search of Amara (guest star Emily Swallow). Matt Cohen directed the episode written by Davy Perez (#1515). Original airdate 10/15/2020.

Written by: Davy Perez

Director: Matt Cohen

Filming Dates: 1/27-2/5

Airdate: unknown. October 15th

Photos: http://www.ksitetv.com/supernatural/supernatural-gimme-shelter-preview-images-released/205510/

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ?yes  Jack ? Yes

Guest stars: Emily Sparrow? 

Other Spoilers/info:

There was some filming done at the crossroads with only Misha. 

Alex and Misha filmed together

It seems as if J2 didn’t film at all the first week, Misha filmed six or seven days, is this is a Cas centric ep?

Episode 15x16

Title: Drag Me Away (From You)

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: FLASHBACK TO A YOUNG SAM AND DEAN – Sam (Jared Padalecki) and Dean (Jensen Ackles) are asked to investigate the murder of a childhood friend, calling them back to a motel from their past and perplexing the brothers with a case they thought was solved a long time ago. Amyn Kaderali directed the episode written by Meghan Fitzmartin (#1516). Original airdate 10/22/2020.

Written by: Megan Fitzmartin

Director: Amyn Kaderali

Filming Dates: 2/6-2/17

Airdate: October 22nd

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? I think so… briefly? Jack ? not sure either. 

Guest stars: IMDB credits Lisa Berry (Billie/Death)  as well as Young Sam, Young Dean and both grown and young Caitlyn

Other Spoilers/info:

Alex got a cast of his face around the filming of this- so this ep or the one after

Looks like we get Dean in a robe!

They filmed at Rooster’s Sunrise Hotel for 3 days/nights

This is the flashback ep

From TVLine- “It worked not only as a case right now, but also as something that informed the journey Sam and Dean have taken, where they started as kids, how they kind of came together and then how that has [led up] to the point that they are, emotionally, when the episode airs. So it ended up being a really good reflection of our guys now, telling a story about our guys then, which, to me, are always the best versions of those types of flashback stories.”

Episode 15x17

Title: Unity

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS:  ONE WAY OR ANOTHER – Dean (Jensen Ackles) hits the road with Jack (Alexander Calvert) who needs to complete a final ritual in the quest to beat Chuck (guest star Rob Benedict). A difference of opinion leaves Sam (Jared Padalecki) and Castiel (Misha Collins) behind looking for answers to questions of their own. Catriona McKenzie directed the episode written by Meredith Glynn (#1517). Original airdate 10/29/2020.

Written by: Meredith Gylnn

Director: Catrion McKenzie

Filming Dates: 2/19-2/28

Airdate: Oct 29th?

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? yes Jack ? yes

Guest stars: Rob Benedict and Emily Sparrow. IMDB credits Robert Wisdom (Uriel)

Other Spoilers/info:

Chuck and Amara trailers were seen on set when filming in a garden

Jensen was in NOLA Friday, possible Monday

“Uriel” was around for filming (Post COVID update: Misha seemed to indicate that this was because the actor was nearby filming? Not sure if this is to cover up the spoiler or the truth)

Alex and Jensen filmed in the imala

Episode 15x18

Title: Despair (it was The Truth at some point I think)

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: 

Written by: BOBO

Director: Speight

Filming Dates: 3/2--3/11

Airdate: Nov 5th?

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? yes Jack ? yes

Guest stars: IMDB credits Billie

Other Spoilers/info:

Misha and Alex filmed near the impala. J2 showed up later that night. This was the source of the “last time they all filmed on set” photo)

An really emotional scene was filmed with Misha and Jensen. Jared was definitely not there, but Alex was on the flight they took with Rich, so its possible he was too. This was revealed at a con in which the four of them were on a plane that had an in-flight problem.

Filming watchers saw a bro hug

Tape Ball posted a shot of field that looks like where dean came back from hell

Misha indicated this was his “favorite episode” in a recent interview

Episode 15x19

Title: Inherit the Earth

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: 

Written by: bucklelimg

Director: John Showalter

Filming Dates:: 3/12-3/23/cancelled for COVID and then 8/18-8/27

Airdate: Nov 12th

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? unknown Jack ? yes

Guest stars: Jake Abel (Micheal), Mark Pelligrino (Lucifer) 

Other Spoilers/info:

Production shut down as a precaution for coronavirus on 3/13, two days into filming. It is scheduled to start again on Aug 18th. 

Jensen indicated there might be some re-writes for this ep to account for COVID protocols.

When they started filming, they indicated they were on day two. So maybe they could only use some of the scenes they shot? Then they added an extra day all called it day 9. COVID protocols makes things take longer 

AlCal was definitely on set. 

Jake Abel is definitely on set, and he posted an instagram story with his trailer and Lucifer’s (Mark Pelligrino)

Some filming was done at a gas station called Showalter’s (name of the director) with Jared, Jensen, and Alex

Jake “Spoiler King” Abel filmed a video showing chairs for Jared, Jensen, and Alex as well as Rob Benedict (Chuck/God). They were filming near a lake with a mountain view (that looked similar to where Cas died in season 13)

Rob Benedict posted it was his last day in Vancouver, indicating we won't see Chuck past this episode? Or very very briefly in 20? Jake Abel posted a similar message, also baiting fans about Misha’s whereabouts 

Scene “28” took several days and seemed to go across both 19 and 20? So they might have done some combo filming?

 Episode 15x20

Title: Carry On

OFFICIAL SYNOPSIS: 

Written by: Dabb

Director: Bob Singer

Filming Dates: 8/28- 9/10  

Airdate: November 19th

Photos: 

Promo:

Sneak Peak:

Castiel ? maaaaybe? Jack ? maaaaybe?

Guest stars: Jim Beaver

Other Spoilers/info:

Jensen indicated filming would take two weeks, longer than usual (looks like a 9 day shoot, with a day off for Labor Day)

According to Superwiki, 9/3 was the last day on the bunker set, the final days are on location. 

Scene “28” took several days and seemed to go across both 19 and 20? So they might have done some combo filming?

Filming locations seemed to include a barn (pic with a stunt guy showed wooden walls and straw) and a lake (not the mountain lake from 19), and a forest. Filming signs spotted at Lower Seymour Conservation Reserve. 

Jim Beaver confirmed his appearance on Twitter

There was a pic of J2 with baby on a bridge. Baby had her original plates. They seem to be wearing the same clothes they were in the pilot. There may be grey (??) In their hair, but that could be lighting

Misha posted some creation videos, saying he had been on an impromptu camping trip. He was back in his house. They were posted on the last day of filming and he had pretty decent scruff. He also mentioned that it was the last day of filming and he wasn't up there. 

The show officially wrapped at 6:25 on 9/10

Jared said “the last time Sam and Dean see each other is the last time Jared and Jensen film together” but seem to imply that was not the final scene? It was a confusing answer to a question about filming the final scene.

IMDB credits a vampire?

[a-jynx]

Started With A Tease - Part 2: It’s Only Monday..

Summary: Two boys in two completely different worlds, yet somehow… They are able to collide. Their green and blue eyes meeting for the first time, but they’re able to tell they’ve met before, only not like this. Not like it was only the two of them in the whole galaxy - but that’s where it started.. It started with a tease.

Warnings: Cursing, Highschool, mentions of smoking and drinking, mentions of drugs, heavy make-out sessions, mentions of sex, fighting, blood, mentions of child abuse, runaways, two different worlds collide into one. Destiel!!!

Chapter Warning: Mentions of bullying, cursing, and Destiel flirting!! :) 

Pairing(s): Dean x Cas, Sam x Reader

Tags: @waywardnewcomer @iliketowrite02 @laceyn-1201 @supernatural-teamfreewillpage @casiskween @i-hear-crazy-calling-my-name @sandlee44 @dillpicklesunflowerseed @redmoon261 @closetspngirl  @samammybee13 @ughs-posts @1967mph  @ficiskween @thekingofgreenapples @a-annonymous-s-blog @reeseweese @mermaidwannabe-clc @heyitsjaybird @iamliteraltrashforanything @my-foot-pussy @fantastic-fans @were-not-the-losechesters @great-godpotato-akane  

Enjoy! Feedback is the glue to my writing!

“Hey, nice job out there, Winchester!” Several of the guys slapped my back as I laughed, shaking the water droplets from my hair before shuffling on a pair of boxers before grabbing my sweats and dragging them on.

“Eh, tell Bobby we said hi!”

“I will! Hey, make sure to have some shots for me tonight!” I called after them as they hollered, waving byes and heading out. The locker room grew quiet as I took my time getting ready; I knew I had no real reason to rush... Sam didn’t need the Baby until later tonight and I didn’t have the game until seven.

Pulling my torn up t-shirt over head, I stuffed the rest of my belongings into my duffel bag, slipping on my shoes and slung the heavy bag over my shoulder, glancing down at my phone as I exited into the empty hallways.

“And this seems to be something I’d see in my nightmares..” I mumbled before shifting my duffel bags weight as I moved further down the hall, and towards the student parking lot. Pushing open the heavy metal door, I glanced around to see a few cars and trucks were still littering the parking lot - but I also knew some of them were teachers.

Sighing, I shifted the bags’ weight once again before making my way towards Baby, her freshly cleaned, slick black paint shining in the bright fall sun. Half grinning to myself, I popped open her trunk and tossed in my duffel bag, then slammed it shut and moved towards the driver side.

Listening to the heavenly purr of Baby’s engine, I started off towards Bobby’s Auto and Body shop for my few hours before the big game tonight. Turning my fingers over the knobs of the volume, the speakers began to blare out, ‘Wanted Dead or Alive’ while drumming fingers along with the beat.

Driving down my usual road to get home, and to work, I slowed down when a group of people appeared around the corner. Two of them wearing.. Oh, great, rival school colors. Clenching my jaw, I figured it was something that wouldn’t need my attention.. So, pressing the gas I continued towards my house.. Coming to a stop sign, I kept glancing back in my rearview before huffing out a sigh and checking around the other three-ways before making an illegal U-turn, heading back towards the group.

Putting Baby into park, I threw open my door and looked around, trying to find the group. I stopped once I spotted them, the two rivals standing above another Falcon. Frowning, I cracked my neck before walking over, smirking as I did so - this was going to be fun.

“Your lucky we don’t break your fucking lights, you motherfucker-” The larger Senior growled as I arched a brow, instantly recognizing his voice.

“Oh, look.. The Prep Brothers, and can I ask what the hell you think you’re doing on Falcon side of Sioux Falls?” I called out, catching all of their attention as Alex dropped the dark-haired guy onto the ground while Justin moved forward, squinting at me as if he couldn’t see.

“Why don’t you mind your own damn business, Linebacker?” Justin spat as I arched a brow, keeping a stone cold face as I turned my head towards the guy on the ground; I hadn’t seen him before but I recognized him from Y/N’s description of the new exchange student. I took a warning step forward as Alex stepped up behind Justin.

“Calm down there, benchwarmer. But to answer your question, when I see someone from my school getting messed with, and it’s a rival, then it’s my place to make it my damn business.” I growled before crossing my arms over my chest, ticking up my chin as they narrowed their eyes.

“So, I would suggest moving on and leave. Him. Alone.” I snapped as they took a step back, frowning before they scoffed and backed away from dark-hair as I moved towards him, getting in between them and him.

“Whatever, just wait till tonight!” Alex shouted before they began walking down the street, making me huff before turning my attention towards the guy on the ground.

“Hey, you okay? Nothing was broken or stolen, right?” I half-grinned as I reached out my hand, as he reached up and took it, I gently pulled him from the tar before scanning over him.

“No, I.. I should be fine, thanks for stopping..” He sheepishly laughed as I smiled at him, rubbing the back of my neck and waved him off.

“Nah, it’s like I said to them, when I see someone from the school getting messed with or something, I step in.”

“That’s nice of you..” He sighed before taking off his backpack, looking all in it before groaning, causing me to arch one of my brows.

“You okay?”

“No, they took my chemistry textbook.. Dammit.” The dark-haired boy sighed before zipping up his bag and turning back towards me with a small smile. “Again, thanks for helping me, but I should probably head home..” He waved a small, awkward wave before he started walking back down the road.

I stood there and in a matter of two seconds, I was running after him, grabbing onto his bicep causing him to jump and stop.

“Let me drive you.” I huffed a little as he furrowed his brows, arching one as well before scoffing and shifting the weight of his bookbag.

“You don’t even know my name, linebacker.” He slightly teased as I arched a brow, laughing before gently releasing his arm and rubbing the back of my neck.

“I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours.” I curled a smirk as he shook his head, laughing before turning his attention back towards me with a small smile.

“Castiel, or Cas..”

“Dean, I’m Sam’s older brother and Y/N’s biggest annoyance.” I laughed as Cas chuckled, making me smile more as I nodded towards Baby. We started to walk back as we talked a little, not really talking of anything major but... Small talk.

We climbed into Baby, but before taking off I reached into the back and grabbed my separate school bag, before dragging it into the front seat between us. I reached in a pulled out my Chemistry book and gently tossed it to Cas, who looked at me with an arched brow.

“We can share it, at least, until the school can give you another one,” I smirked as he grinned widely.

“Thanks, Dean... That means a lot.” He smiled more as I put Baby into drive and took off, not really thinking about how.. Strange this was. I had just saved this boy, found out his name, gave him my textbook, and he has me smiling like some idiot on Molly…

“Uh, yeah.. No problem, Cas.” I grinned back before turning my attention back towards the road, my thoughts clouding as I would steal small glances towards him. I mean, he was pretty to look at - and that meant something coming from me.

“He had dark, dark hair that helped complement his bright, almost sapphire blue eyes! Like, Dean, this boy looked like an angel!” Y/N squeaked before stabbing at her pasta that Sam had made her a few nights ago.

“You’re ridiculous - I mean, what about Sammy?” I scoffed while taking a large gulp from my gallon of water. Y/N scoffed and rolled her eyes before talking, “please, I love Samuel, like more than anything or anyone - no offense.”

“None taken..”

“But, this kid literally came from a town called Heaven, he’s named after an angel, and he has the looks of someone too innocent to even be alive!” Y/N droned on as I arched a brow, not really buying before but now? After seeing him… I could honestly agree with her.

This Castiel character looked like a damn God... What the hell am I thinking?! Stop it. No.. I like girls - I love girls. I love tits, and.. And...

I glanced over at Cas once again as I swallowed thickly, before returning to my thoughts. I just met him, why the hell do I suddenly think he’s a God?! Just because he has gorgeous eyes, a.. A cute smile.. And.. 

Ah, crap...

“Hey, Dean-” Cas’s voice suddenly cut through my thoughts as I snapped my head towards him, feeling it redden up as I fought back a sudden coughing fit from sucking down my spit too quickly.

“Ye.. Yeah?” I cleared my throat before tightening and released my grip around the steering wheel. Cas arched a brow but didn’t question as he pointed towards the Tuckers’ old place, a nice little family that Bobby had grown up with.

“You live here..?” I asked as I came to a slow stop, he nodded with a grin as he glanced towards the driveway, no cars were crowding it.. Which is sort of weird? Cas threw open the door and began to collect his things as I watched, slightly straining myself as I kept glancing towards the house.

“Well, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow, Dean.. Good luck at the game tonight.” Cas smiled before it fell and he started walking towards the house, my mind already made up, I threw open my door and stood up, shouting after him.

“Cas! Cas, wait, hey.. Why don’t you come to the game tonight?” I smiled as I leaned against the cool metal of Baby’s top. Cas stopped walking as he slowly turned around, an awkward smile on his face as I fought back the urge to bite my lip.

“You’re serious? Like, not a joke? Or some type of practical prank, right?” Cas turned around and continued to give me a questioning look as I arched a brow, leaning further against Baby as I nodded.

“I’m a thousand percent positive I want you to come - maybe, me, you, Sam, and Y/N can all hang out? We have this really awesome spot that we could all go too afterward.” I shot him a smile as he slowly began to grin, turning his attention down onto the pavement before he licked his lips and slowly nodded; looking back up whilst gripping tightly onto my Chem. book.

“I’ll be there.. So, see you soon?” He grinned as I nodded, waving as he turned around and crossed the street, my arm falling limply onto the roof of Baby before I slowly leaned against her, watching him until the front door shut behind him.

“Oooh, fuck me..” I sighed while rubbing a hand over my face, before hearing my phone begin to ring, pulling it out of my pocket I sighed as I realized it was Bobby.

“Hey, Bobby..”

“Kid, where the hell is you?!” He snapped as I somewhat flinched knowing I should’ve called, or at least texted him. I rubbed the back of my neck as I climbed back into Baby, slamming the door shut as I sighed.

“Sorry, Bobby.. Somethings came up during practice that had me stay late. I’m heading that way now, alright?” I prayed that coach wasn’t up there, knowing that he always headed towards Bobby’s to talk, or just hang out until his wife was calling him home.

“Mm, alright, you better get here quick - I need your help with one of these newer built cars.” Bobby sighed, signaling his annoyance as I grinned, practically thanking God as I hung up and threw Baby back into drive. But, pulling away from that house.. It left this feeling in my stomach that I couldn’t quite put my finger on.. But, who knows? Maybe I’m just worried about messing up in front of my sudden man crush...

God, it’s only Monday…

Part 3: Coming Soon