#and all this on top of how society pushes romance on everyone

[flecks-of-stardust]

expanding on the shipping thing, especially since i made that shipping tagging request recently, like. i don't have an issue with shipping, whatever that... even really means, because to be honest i don't even fully know what people use it to mean. like seriously, when someone says they're a 'shipper' i literally do not understand what exactly they're referring to, because there are so many ways you can 'ship' something.

romantic relationships between characters can be interesting and incredibly so. artihunter, as an example from rain world, has a lot of interesting directions you can take narratively, irrespective of whether you take it in a romantic direction or in a platonic direction or a familial direction or what have you. the tragedy of loving someone you know you're going to lose; having to confront the idea that despite all your flaws, someone still loves you for who you are; mourning and grieving and ultimately moving on with someone who just Gets It at your side; etc etc etc, artihunter can be so interesting, and it's nice to see when artists tap into that. and the same can be said about a lot of other ships probably, rain world or otherwise.

and this isn't to say that shipping—romantic, platonic, whatever, but let's be real we're mostly talking romantic here—that isn't narratively weighty, ie stuff that's just 'these two characters are invested in each other lives and there's nothing more to it,' that's not Bad. that's not boring. sometimes that too can have narrative weight, and i like it. like, i'm not opposed to shipping, if that's how it comes off sometimes. i just like stories, ones that explore concepts and themes, regardless of what the medium may be. if it's told from the perspective of characters who are romantically invested in each other, sure, cool. i am okay with that. just in general, shipping doesn't have to have. like. story, or narrative significance or whatever to be 'good.'

i just. i don't fucking care for a lot of it. it's not interesting to Me. before i started mass blocking ship tags i would see a lot of art that was kind of just the same thing over and over again, like character A doing some classic romantic thing with character B and it's. that's it. it's not new and there's no story and the point of it is that these two characters are romantically interested in each other and i don't. care. i really, really don't. some people enjoy it! it's really interesting to other people! and that's fine! i can't say i haven't occasionally looked at ship art and smiled at the characters being cute. it was made with care and passion and it shows.

my problem with ship content in general is the oversaturation of ship content in fandom. i can't say how much there is since i have so many tags blocked, but i'd be willing to bet that it's at least 50% of all content made for a particular piece of media. which... is disheartening, you know. especially as an aromantic person. i have to sift through so fucking much shit that doesn't interest me and has no relevance to me to find something that's actually interesting. to an extent it makes me kind of bitter because it feels like most people just run to make romantic headcanons of the characters for the sake of shipping, and then devote their time into doing just that. that's probably a gross exaggeration of how a lot of people are, but at times that's really how it feels. there's so much fandom content, so much community content, that just... is not relevant to me at all. it gets alienating.

i don't really have a point to make with this post, a lot of this is just me rambling because i'm up way too late, but. i dunno. just thoughts. i don't actually mind shipping. i just wish more of the ship content i could see has more. story weight to it i guess. because then i actually have something to be invested in.

it makes me sad having all these tags blocked, honestly. i miss out on so much art. which is part of the problem. do you get it?

[disaster-writer]

Poison (Part 2/4)

Pairing: Alpha!Bokuto x Beta!Reader

Summary: You loved love, but it wasn’t made for you… but maybe a certain Alpha could change your mind

Word Count: 7.7k

AU: Omegaverse

Part 1

(L/N) Ami was many things.

A desirable and beautiful Omega. Playful and fun with a sharp cutting wit. She’s masterfully gotten Alphas to bend to her own commands in the past, including her father and brothers.

But above all else, she was a meddler. Or what she preferred to be called: A Matchmaker.

Both her older twin brothers were mated before high school even ended. For her youngest sister however, she was still working on it.

But you? You were always the most difficult and not because you refused to play your part. You did it beautifully in fact all throughout high school and the beginning of college. She convinced you to confess to many people she thought would be good for you and you never shied from the challenge, something she greatly envied herself as she was much too timid to ever put herself out there.

But no one ever wanted you, and after each and every rejection, she watched as your drive and confidence diminished little by little.

Until you gave up completely.

The night still haunts her whenever she’d look back on it. 

You were twenty years old when you came back home from class one evening. You and your sisters all shared a room so when they saw you were in tears upon entering they were both on high alert.

You told them you had run into an old high school acquaintance. A high school acquaintance that you had a bit of a crush on back then. You figured you’d shoot your shot as he was the only guy you liked that had always intimidated you too much to try and ask out. 

The great Ushiwaka.

He rejected you.

And of all the people that had ever rejected you, you told them that he was the meanest.

Everyone was well aware that Ushijima Wakatoshi was very blunt with his words and lacked any eloquence. You knew that but what he had told you that day made you want to never pursue another relationship with an Alpha or an Omega again.

You weren’t and would never be compatible with any other presentation that wasn’t another Beta.

You didn’t even have any friends other than your sisters she came to realize. But it made sense in that the schools your parents always pushed you in were always elite and top notch, the students that attended those schools always seemed to come from traditionalist families.

Apparently a Beta had no ranking among society now that they made up such a small portion of the worlds population.

After seeing the pain you were in she decided to hang up the apron of matchmaking and instead devoting her life to hearing your cries of woe concerning love, no matter how pathetic it seemed.

She thought things would get better once you started your career… and at least she thinks they did. But you never spoke about the people you worked with. Whenever it came to work talk you only told them about your job and nothing else.

So after this revelation, smelling you bathed in an Alphas scent and receiving gifts… 

She was taking the apron off its hook again.

She had cried all night over sappy romance movies with you, gone to your Pilates class, and went out to dinner with you all while the cogs in her head were turning.

Once you were fast asleep she snuck into your room to confirm her suspicions.

She went to your closet and dug through it, and sure enough nearly all of your work attire in some way or another smelled like the very same Alpha.

After that she had snuck back downstairs and into the guest room to search the internet. Typing in Bokuto msby black jackals and pulled up images.

Her eyes widened as she stared at the screen, the light from her laptop illuminating her entire face within the dark room.

”What the fuck (Y/N)?” She muttered softly, scrolling through photos of Bokuto with his teammates, on court, interview screenshots. Pictures of him shirtless and playing beach volleyball with his teammates. Other pictures with him dripping with sweat and his hair fallen down after particularly intense games.

She looked up his stats. 

Height: 6’2.9” 

Weight: 192lbs

Power: 5; Jumping: 4; Stamina: 5; Game sense: 3; Technique: 5; Speed: 4

“You hit the fucking jackpot you bitch!” She quietly cheered.

After her little late night detective work, Ami couldn’t go back to sleep. She was too excited. If she was going to get you mated once and for all she knew what she had to do.

Just like any case before, she had to make contact. Her technique would have to be different for this one however. Back in high school, first contact was always talking you up and getting the guy to even think of you as a possibility. So for Bokuto, contact meant she was going to have to coach him into mating you. It was probably going to prove difficult though. Your self worth isn’t where it used to be so he’s going to have to pull his weight in getting you to take him seriously as a dating option. Especially since strong Alphas always seemed out of your potential suitor criteria.

But to do that she was going to actually have to meet him.

And to do that…

Ami had pounced on you the second your alarm went off at 7am.

”Take me to work with you today!”

You groaned tiredly, “Noooo.”

”Please!”

”No. Don’t wanna… and get off,” you weakly wiggled, trying to get her off you.

”Not until you agree to take me to work with you!”

You sighed and groaned once more. Waking up more and more with each loud yell.

“Why would you even want to go? It’s gonna be boring for you.”

”I’d be more bored stuck here all day!”

”I’m not forcing you to stay inside idiot.”

”Yeah but you love your job and I want to see where you work!”

You finally opened your eyes, blinking away the sleep as the raspiness in your voice began to even out just slightly.

”I can’t just bring people to work whenever I want, what do you think this is?”

”You told me a while ago that sometimes one of their mates will come watch practice. So that means I can come and watch!”

You glared at her, “You’re gonna make me look bad.”

”I’ll make you look great!” She exclaimed, jumping up and down on you in excitement and rattling the whole bed, “Alphas love me!”

You rolled your eyes, finally sitting up and pushing her off you. She tumbled down onto the ground with a thud.

Mochi who had been on the ground, probably because she had shaken the whole bed when she first jumped on you, stuck her nose out to sniff her. 

“No. I have a reputation there. A reputation that you have no business ruining.”

”And what reputation is that? Did you trick everyone into thinking you’re this serious work lady like you did in high school so they wouldn’t know how big of a baby you actually are?”

You scoffed, getting to your knees and looking down over the bed at her, “Baby!? You’re the baby!”

”Adults don’t have a bunch of anime dolls!” She exclaimed, accusingly pointing to your shelves of anime figures you had on display.

”Plenty of adults have those—“

“And what about when you threw a tantrum yesterday because I stole one bite of your dessert!”

“Shut up you loser!” You leapt off the bed and onto her, “It was mine anyway!” You exclaimed as she began wrestling back and tugging on your hair, making you yelp. You yanked her hair back and the two of you immediately stopped with the others hair in a tight grip.

”Take me!” She exclaimed, pulling your hair and causing you to yelp in pain again. 

So you yanked hers back, causing her to let out a pained sound as well, “Never! You’re forbidden to step foot into my workplace!”

“You owe me!”

”How do I owe you!?”

“For all the times I’ve had to console you at like 5 am cause you were crying over a fucking movie!”

”You agreed to that!”

”I’ve also spent every Valentines Day with you for the past ten years just cause you didn’t want to feel lonely!”

The two of you fell silent, keeping each other in the others death grip.

Finally you caved, “God, FINE!”

* * * *

You stared out the window across from where you were seated on the train, glaring at the bright and sunny day. It’s as if it were mocking you as your sister tagged along with you happily seated next to you.

You could see it almost being comical to an onlooker to see you with the metaphorical storm cloud hanging over your head while your sister rocked side to side in joy and excitement with her usual giant grin.

And you knew people were looking… they were just looking at her though.

Because as usual your cute omega sister got dressed up in her usual attire consisting of a pretty blouse and skirt, paired with cute high heeled boots despite the fact that she’d just be sitting in a gym all day.

While you, in all your Beta glory, sat in your regular MSBY Black Jackals tracksuit. The uniform you wore when you’d be attending practice and not doing office work.

So it was no wonder your sister stole the show, even on a monotonous train ride to work.

The train had come to a stop and she had happily followed you off the train.

The moment the gymnasium had come into view you began laying down some ground rules.

”No embarrassing me, no fighting with me, you’re not allowed to just pounce on me out of no where because I will kill you. Stay away from the team, the coach, and the athletic trainers. You’re to stay by my side the entire time,” you shoved the door open, stepping foot into the hallway which lead to the gym, “These are my co-workers so no flirting—“

”Okay, okay. I got it mom. Sheesh, it’s like you forgot that I’m the older sister.” She rolled her eyes, trailing after you.

You stopped short right before the giant double doors, turning hastily towards her, “I’m serious Ami. These guys respect me, and I swear if you do anything to screw that up I’m locking you in the guest room until you die.”

She narrowed her eyes at you and the two of you stared at each other challengingly.

”…You have coffee breath,” she deadpanned.

You gasped, slapping a hand over your mouth, “You are such a bitch!” You hissed, pushing the gym door open and shoving her through it before furiously looking through your bag for a breath mint.

The team must have still been in the locker room since no one was out yet besides the coach when you arrived.

”Ah, good morning Samson-san,” you greeted.

”Good morning!” He called back from the bench, looking at your sister in curiosity, “And who’s this?”

”This,” you gestured towards your sister, stopping beside the bench, “Is my sister Ami. She’s staying with me for a couple weeks and she was interested in watching practice— I hope this isn’t imposing on—“

”No, no, of course not,” he waved you off, “It’s nice to meet you Ami, are you a volleyball fan?”

”Thank you! You too!” She grinned cheerfully, “And of course! With all my sisters games I had to attend back in high school it’s kind of hard not to be,” she laughed.

Samson raised an eyebrow at this and looked at you, “I didn’t realize you used to play (Y/N).

Your eyes widened slightly, “Oh yeah— I only ever played casually though,” you tried to wave off.

”Casually!?” She exclaimed, glancing at you before looking back at Samson, “She bawled her eyes out when she found out she wouldn’t be going pro— Ouch!”

You stomped on her foot.

You laughed awkwardly and gripped your sisters wrist, “Don’t mind her. She doesn’t know half the things that come out her mouth.” You then tugged her along towards the bleachers.

Samson eyed the two of you curiously before looking down at his clipboard, “Interesting,” he muttered under his breath.

”What did I just tell you?” You seethed.

Ami rolled her eyes, yanking her wrist out of your hand, “So-rry for thinking the coach would have known the manager used to play volleyball.” She muttered sarcastically.

”And you don’t know the first thing about volleyball you liar.”

”That’s not true! I know um… I know libero!”

”You only know that word because that was my position,” you deadpanned.

”Whatever I still know it—“

She cut herself off as the men’s locker room door had swung open and the team started filing out into the gym.

You glanced at them before looking back at Ami, “Sit down,” you said, pushing her onto the bleachers, “And remember this is my job—“

”HEY, HEY, HEYYY.”

Your stomach dropped, “Oh come on.”

And just like that, one second you were looking at your sister and the next your feet were off the ground in one of Bokuto’s bone crushing hugs.

”Beta-chan! Are you staying for practice today!?”

“Yes, Bokuto-san. That’s why I’m in my tracksuit—“

Your sister’s eyes glowed as she stared at this interaction, completely blind to the group of Alphas staring and whispering about her instead.

”—Now put me down,” you ordered the large Alpha. To which he did with a frown. “Thirty push ups. Go. You know I’ve told you time and time again that you’re not allowed to ambush me like that.”

He was about to respond when the scent of an Omega reached his nose and… honestly you don’t think it ever took someone that long not to realize your sister was there.

”Who’s this?” He looked down at your sister with big, curious eyes.

“This is—“

”I’m Ami!” She exclaimed, jumping to her feet, “(Y/N)‘s sister!”

“Sister?” He grinned, “I didn’t know Miss Manager had a sister!”

She smiled at you teasingly, “Yeah, my little sister loves to keep her secrets. But you must be Bokuto-san, (Y/N) has told me so much about you!”

Bokuto’s eyes instantly lit up, ”She has!?”

”HAH!?” You yelled in shock, “I’m sorry, but I need a moment alone with Ami— go do your push ups.”

You gripped your sister’s wrist and dragged her outside the gym, the entire team watching the scene in shock.

“Whoa,” Hinata said in wonder, “I don’t think I’ve ever seen Miss Manager so flustered.”

”Her sister has no bond mark!” Atsumu exclaimed, starting to run to the gym doors but being held back by Sakusa’s grip on the collar of his shirt.

”Leave her alone you stupid Alpha,” Sakusa muttered.

* * * *

After yelling at your sister and putting her in her place, things finally seemed to have returned to normal.

Your sister sat on the bleachers quietly while you helped Samson run practice and kept notes. You did your other usual tasks of providing water bottles, handing out towels, and providing encouragement throughout the day. Especially Bokuto as he always seemed to actively search out the praise more than the others.

Truth be told, practice had seemed to go by even better than usual… but you were also pretty sure they were all just trying to show off to the unmated Omega in the back.

You stared down at your clipboard, making sure you jotted down all the notes that Samson gave you during practice. Absentmindedly taking off your jacket and putting it beside you on the bench, you flipped over the page, eyes continuing to dance over the page.

Then your phone rang. 

You picked it up and looked at the collar ID.

”Shit,” it was a sponsor. You looked over to Samson watching the team on the sidelines, “I have to take this, I’ll be right back.” You said, getting up and heading out of the gym while he just waved in acknowledgment.

Your sister watched curiously as you ran out of the gym, wondering if she should follow you.

However, after about two minutes, Samson called a lunch break.

You still hadn’t come back, so Ami continued to sit there in confusion as some of the others shuffled off into the locker room or went to their water bottles.

She found her eyes gravitating toward Bokuto as he not so subtly inched his way to the bench as he pretended to drink from his water bottle nonchalantly.

She narrowed her eyes as she watched him knick the jacket of your tracksuit and run off under the bleachers. Following his movements, she peeked through the rows of the bleachers. The view was obstructed but he very clearly was scenting the jacket.

That was when Ami knew that the Alpha courting you was hot… but also may not be the sharpest tool in the shed….

He was perfect for you.

Ami happily walked down the bleachers so she could go and confront the Alpha.

And just like she had been spying on him, Atsumu had been spying on her and found himself following from behind as she went under the bleachers as well.

She grinned deviously as she continued to watch Bokuto crouching down on the floor and furiously rubbing his wrists against the fabric of your jacket. 

Aw, he’s even considerate. She thought to herself. Alphas typically would rub their faces and neck against a piece of fabric to scent it, but because he was covered in sweat from practice he only used his wrists.

He was so focused on scenting it that he didn’t even notice Ami until she jumped right in front of him.

She stood proudly, an accusing finger pointed his way as he looked up like a deer caught in the headlights.

”You!” She boldly exclaimed… almost a little too boldly for an Omega, “Are courting my sister!”

If Bokuto was any other Alpha he may have looked away in shame and embarrassment after having been caught doing something like this so blatantly… but this was Bokuto and shame and embarrassment weren’t exactly words that were in his dictionary.

”Has she noticed yet!?” 

“…Huh?” She dropped her hand… he really didn’t seem to be shy about this whatsoever.

”Has (Y/N)-chan noticed I’ve been courting her!?” He reiterated. “She has right? I made sure to scent her other jacket a lot last week.” 

She blinked dumbfounded, as he smiled so proudly of himself. “Well not exactly, but I was certainly able to smell it yesterday,” she crossed her arms, raising a brow, “Her entire closet damn well smells like you.”

Bokuto’s eyes only shined brighter and she could smell the certain notes in his scent smell even better as the news only made him happier.

“Don’t you understand that she’s a Beta?” She asked flatly, not being able to understand why he was trying to court you like an Omega. “She can’t smell you. She just thinks her jacket smells like a man.”

”That’s progress!”

”Progress?… How long have you been courting her?”

He looked to be counting on his fingers before he stated, “Nine months.”

”Nine months!” She hissed, Alphas tended to give up after a month when their courting efforts either went unnoticed or unreciprocated. 

How in the hell did you manage to get an Alpha like this to fall head over fucking heels for you to try and court you for nine months and be more than happy with the fact that you’re only sort of noticing a scent lingering on you at this point.

”I don’t understand Bokuto-san, why haven’t you just asked out my sister yet?”

”That’s what I’ve been tellin’ him this whole fuckin’ time!”

Ami and Bokuto looked over to find Atsumu hiding by the entrance of the bleachers.

”She’s starting to notice though!” Bokuto called back as Atsumu finally made his way over to the two of them.

”Ya always say that but she’s never noticed!”

”He’s right,” Ami nodded, “She was completely drenched in your scent yesterday and she had no idea— and how did you even do that by only scenting her clothes?”

”To be fair he hugs her like every five seconds. She gives him penalties every time and he still does it,” he sweatdropped.

”And it’s worth it every time,” Bokuto beamed, now shoving his nose into the collar of your jacket.

”Do you have any shame Bokkun!” Atsumu snapped as he watched the Alpha do this openly in front of your sister.

”She smells good!”

Atsumu sweat dropped once more.

Ami rolled her eyes at their back and forth, “Okay, whatever,” she shook her head, “Forget everything your Alpha instincts have told you to do so far because I’m going to help you properly court a Beta.”

”And what do ya know about courtin’ Betas?” Atsumu asked challengingly.

”She’s my sister dumbass,” she deadpanned. “Now here,” Ami handed her phone to him, “Put your number in and I’ll text you a time and place for us to meet tonight. I’m going to tell you everything it is that you need to know about my sister so that you can properly woo her.”

Bokuto took the phone, staring at Ami in wonder as he digested each and every single word.

He’s been trying to find out more about you ever since he became interested and here Ami is willingly giving him everything he’s wanted and more.

”Kamisama?”

”No, but I’m not opposed to being called that,” she said, flipping her hair over her shoulder.

Atsumu stared down at her, eyes glowing, “Ya have a mate?”

”Nope. And I’m not interested,” she replied sassily as she stalked out from under the bleachers but not before grabbing her phone from Bokuto.

Atsumu narrowed his eyes as she left, “Ohhh, I’m so goin’ to make her my mate.”

”And I’m gonna make her sister mine!”

* * * *

“Why are you staring at me?” You asked your sister.

You were in the middle of making dinner for the two of you tonight while she sat crouched in the corner of the kitchen, going from staring at you intently to furiously typing out things on her phone.

”Oh, no reason~” she lilted.

”Mhm,” you hummed, unconvinced. “And who are you texting?”

”A friend.”

You hummed again, “What vegetables do you want in the stir fry?”

”Oh, I’m not eating here.”

You snapped towards her, “What!? I’ve been cooking this whole time and you didn’t think to say anything sooner?”

She just shrugged, texting whatever to whoever.

”Where are you even going? You’re not from around here.”

She shrugged once more, “So!? I’m a girl with secrets. Let me live. I thought you had volleyball practice tonight anyway.”

You rolled your eyes. Seems like you’d have leftovers for tomorrow night. “It got cancelled,” you muttered, stirring your ingredients for your stir fry on the stove. You had taken up doing volleyball on a local women’s team. It was extremely casual, you guessed it was because they were all Omegas. Back in high school the team you were on had an impressive amount of female Alphas, despite the fact that they were pretty rare. So the team you were on now was no where near as fun but at least you still got to play. “Captain went into heat,” you muttered.

”Ugh,” your sister shivered, “Don’t remind me, my heat’s supposed to be coming up soon.” You snickered at her. “By the way, what does the team have to do for ruts?” She asked, still typing away.

”They’re all on a scheduled medication that suppresses their ruts.”

”But I thought that was dangerous?”

”It is. That’s why on the off season they all go off of it— I’ve overheard some horror stories about it from them.”

”That’s crazy! What does it do to them!?”

You shrugged, tasting the dish you were preparing. “I don’t really know the details. I just know that they’ll go through a longer rut period and apparently it’s like really fucking violent.”

”Whoa… like more than it’s supposed to be?”

You turned back around to face her, crossing your arms and leaning against the counter. You wore a tank top that rode up slightly, so you could feel the cool countertop dig into your skin. 

You sighed, inhaling the savory scent of your cooking, “I think? It’s pretty scary to think— they’re all so big and really fucking strong.”

”Yeah like Bokuto!” She yelped, finding her opening to talk about him and taking it.

“I was actually thinking more about Joffe— y’know that guy is fucking 7’2”—“

”Yeah but what about Bokuto—?”

”You like Bokuto or something?” You narrowed your eyes at her, trying to pin her with your stare. You weren’t stupid, you knew what she was trying to do. But if you gave her an inch she’d take a mile.

”No, you dummy!” 

You waved her off, “Yeah, whatever, like Bokuto.” You turned back to the stove, “When are you leaving?”

She looked down at her phone, “Oh crap! I was supposed to leave like ten minutes ago!” She jumped to her feet.

You watched her scramble and trip over her own feet as she got ready and then ran out the door without so much as a goodbye.

You rolled your eyes.

”Omegas.”

* * * *

Bokuto sat in the dim, tight booth. It was quite the comedic sight to see such a large man squeezing himself in such a tight space… what was even funnier was the fact he was even squished between two other professional athletes as Atsumu and Hinata sat on either side of him.

Sakusa was invited to join as well but after finding out what it was for he nearly rolled his eyes so far back into his skull he almost had to go to the hospital.

“Will ya stop fidgeting!” Atsumu barked.

”Is she here yet!?” Bokuto yelled, trying to lean past Atsumu to look out the window of the bar.

”Like the last ten times ya asked, no!”

”Do you think her sister’s gonna come to practice tomorrow too?” Hinata asked.

”I already called dibs!” Atsumu snapped.

Just then the little bell above the door rang, and the three Alphas were suddenly all leaning in one direction to see who it was.

”She’s here!” Hinata exclaimed.

And sure enough there was the cute little Omega they had all met earlier that day. 

Bokuto and Atsumu tried standing up so fast they banged their knees against the table from underneath, causing a loud bang and the other patrons of the restaurant to stare at them.

Ami paid it no mind and slid into the other side of the booth across from them.

“Hello stupid little Alphas!”

”Little!?” Hinata yelped.

”Stupid!?” Atsumu echoed.

”Why are they here?” Ami asked Bokuto, pointing at Hinata and Atsumu.

”They’re my wingmen!”

”Wingmen?” Ami asked, scandalized, “What do you need them for? You already have me!”

”He needs an Alpha’s opinion,” Atsumu boldly claimed.

”Why? Cause you guys have helped him so much these past nine months?” She asked sarcastically.

”Hey, they would already be poppin’ out babies if Bokkun just listened to me.”

Ami rolled her eyes, “Uh-huh, anywaysss. Nine months, really?” She questioned looking straight at Bokuto. “I love my sister, I really do. But I’ve never met an Alpha that spent more that two months at the most before giving up on a courtship. And those were with Omegas. So…” She paused, “Why exactly do you like her so much?”

Atsumu scoffed, “We’ve been tryin’ to get that outta him for months now— he won’t tell us.”

”It’s between me and (Y/N),” Bokuto grinned.

Ami furrowed her eyebrows, “Did something happen between you guys?”

”Yes—“

”No,” Atsumu finished, he looked at Bokuto, “Ya keep sayin’ that but ya’ve never been alone with her. How did somethin’ happen without the rest of the team knowin’ then?” 

”Okay, I’m asking the questions,” Ami muttered annoyed, “And I’m not asking you Atsumu, I’m asking Bokuto.” She looked at Bokuto, “Now, what happened?”

”I can’t say,” he answered, “It’s only between me and (Y/N).”

Ami stared him down for a moment as she thought. Now if she knew her sister she knew that she’d be the first person she’d tell if you had any sort of romantic event happen to you. 

“Are you sure? Cause I don’t even think she knows there’s something between you two.”

”If I say then it’s not special anymore,” he said with a frown now. “And of course she knows— it was very intimate.”

If Ami had been drinking something at that moment she knew it would have been all over the Alphas at that moment.

”Intimate? Are we talking about the same woman?” Then it dawned on her, “Bokuto. She’s a Beta, she doesn’t understand the same intimacies between Alphas and Omegas. Now what happened? I need to know if I’m gonna get you two together.”

Bokuto sunk into his seat, staring down at the table. Clearly upset at the fact that he may have misinterpreted what he thought was an intimate moment— but he knew it had to be.

”Alright,” He finally relented. “Last game of last season.”

Both Atsumu and Hinata screwed up their faces in thought, “Last game…?” Hinata started, “Wait it wasn’t when—“

 “Bokuto!” Atsumu suddenly hissed, the name slightly foreign as he never called his friend by his last name anymore.

”What!? What happened!?” Ami yelped. Now she had to know.

”Coach has (Y/N) bring some of her t-shirts to games—“

”Cause of the whole calmin’ thing Betas have—“

”Let Bokuto speak,” Ami hissed at him, making him shut his mouth.

”Yeah, cause of that. When games are getting really rough we’ll be sent out and (Y/N) will give us a t-shirt to scent to cool our heads and during our last game I wasn’t doing so well and we already lost a set— the spiker on the other side kept taunting me too so Coach sent me off the court. I was getting a bit worked up—”

Atsumu scoffed, “A bit? You almost went feral.”

Ami ignored Atsumu and watched Bokuto curiously as his cheeks started to tinge pink, “Anyway, I went into the locker room and waited for her to drop off a shirt or jacket or something but she ended up walking in instead. She said she forgot the bag she usually brings and she didn’t have anything on her that she could give me so…”

Understanding seemed to flood Ami’s features, “You scented her.”

Bokuto nodded, face and neck a bright pink now as he recollected the memory. He stared down at the table, fingertips tracing the swirls in the wood. “Her scent was different that close. Like the rest of the guys, I just thought of her as our manager and that was it— but when she was that close I could smell every single note of her scent and every fluctuation. It was subtle but I couldn’t get enough— it was unlike any Omega I had ever scented before.” he suddenly slammed his hand down on the table, looking Ami straight in the eye. “That was when I decided I’d make her my mate.”

Ami stared at him in wonder. Bokuto seemed so determined and so passionate about you it even made her own heart flutter. She also realized you must have been so fucking dense to not have noticed Bokuto nearly drooling over you every day.

She grinned. “When I’m done working my magic, she definitely will become your mate.”

”How could ya not have told any of us that ya actually scented our manager?” Atsumu rhetorically asked as he tried to mentally work through how Bokuto, who was the worst at keeping things to himself, actually managed to keep something this big. But regardless, Atsumu looked back at Ami again, “So how are ya plannin’ on gettin’ them together? No offense, but yer sister is the most oblivious person I’ve ever met— and that’s really saying somethin’— Ow!” He hissed, grabbing the back of his head as Bokuto just smacked him.

Ami ignored their antics, “Easy! Basically Bokuto’s been going about this the entirely wrong way. Your instincts keep telling you to court (Y/N) as if she was an Omega. Honestly just by changing a few things and courting her properly as a Beta, you’ll see she’s going to be very receptive.”

”How are ya so sure? Bokkun doesn’t exactly seem like her type—“ Atsumu suddenly caught Bokuto’s hand from smacking him again, “Will ya stop hittin’ me! I’m just tellin’ the truth!”

”What do you mean?”

”Well (Y/N) is very… professional. And Bokkun isn’t a very serious person.”

”Do you really know nothing about her? She’s been working with you guys for a while hasn’t she?”

”Yeah! But she never comes to our parties or dinners— she never even goes to the team bondings. She doesn’t exist on social media and all she does is talk about work— we didn’t even know she had a sister! Especially an Omega sister!” Hinata exclaimed.

Atsumu nodded in agreement, “We thought her entire family would be Beta’s.”

Ami scoffed out a laugh, “You guys got it all wrong. We come from an extremely traditional family.”

”How traditional?” Bokuto asked, realizing he was about to learn more about you than he was ever able to from you. He leaned forward excitedly.

”Our mom is an Omega, dad an Alpha. We have two older twin brothers who are Alpha’s, then it’s me, then her, and we have a younger Omega sister in college right now.”

”I’m a twin.”

Ami rolled her eyes and ignored Atsumu. “So it was a pretty big deal when she presented as Beta.”

”What happened when she presented?” Bokuto asked, eyes shining.

”Well…” She trailed off, thinking back to the day and the months after you had presented. At the time you were thirteen and she was fourteen and had already presented as an Omega. “She kind of isolated herself from everyone,” Bokuto’s face immediately fell at that, “She used to be pretty popular and had a lot of friends. Mom, dad, and the twin’s doted on her like crazy— they doted on me and our younger sister a lot too. But when she presented everyone kinda… pulled back.” Ami’s gaze was trained on the table now, “None of us expected it and we didn’t really know how to treat her, the Alpha’s in the family didn’t think she’d need the protection anymore so they focused more on me and our youngest sister. I never really thought about it but I think she was in a lot of pain around that time. She lost all her friends and barely spoke to us but I think we all figured it was just cause she was a teenager, and I was already dealing with my own problems.” Ami looked back up, meeting Bokuto’s crestfallen gaze.

”Is that why she never hangs out or talks to us outside of work?” Bokuto asked sadly.

”I guess so. She did the same thing in high school and college, I just hoped she would learn to connect more with people now that she had her career,” a soft smile caressed her lips, “But that’s okay because things are gonna change now, thanks to you!”

And just like that Bokuto lit up again.

”Now,” Ami leaned forward, hands flat on the table, “The first thing you need to know about (Y/N) is that the front that she has put up is a total lie.” The three Alpha’s listened with rapt attention, “She’s very good and professional when it comes to work but she is much more playful and fun than she let’s on, and also she is the biggest hopeless romantic that I have ever met.”

”REALLY!?” Bokuto jumped in his seat.

”Hah?” Both Atsumu and Hinata gasped, dripping in disbelief.

But Ami only nodded enthusiastically, “Yup! She’s in love with love. I’m pretty sure she’s watched a romantic comedy every single day of her life. She’s totally addicted to it. That’s probably why she took the Beta thing so hard— she’s convinced she’s gonna die alone,” she simply shrugged.

”Die alone!?” Bokuto looked taken aback, “But (Y/N)-chan is amazing! And she’s so beautiful! There had to be one person that liked her.”

”Nope,” Ami said, popping the ‘p’, “I tried setting her up many times but no one was ever interested. They all said she was just a boring Beta. She’s probably been rejected over 30 times… then there was that last time of course and she completely gave up on dating.”

A silence fell between the group as Ami watched Bokuto digest this new information.

Hearing the truth of how hopeless you seemed to be in love and the fact that it was something you dreamed about, hurt him. Truthfully, Bokuto looked up to you as the team’s strong and determined manager— nothing ever seemed to get in your way when you wanted to get something done. To hear how much you were hurting inside just because of your presentation which you couldn’t change, only made him want to be your Alpha that much more. That way he could protect you and take care of you the way you secretly wanted to be cared for.

Atsumu leaned his face against his hand, elbow pressed against the table as he digested the new information as well. “What kind of Alpha?”

“He was a pretty scary guy, honestly,” Ami muttered thinking back to high school, “You guys might know him— he’s a pro volleyball player too. Have you heard of Ushiwaka?”

Hinata almost fell out of his seat while Atsumu’s arm nearly slipped off the table as all three pairs of their eyes widened in unison, “Ushijima!?” Bokuto exclaimed, “Well I’m better than him!”

”She got rejected by Ushijima Wakatoshi— that asshole?” Atsumu said.

”I didn’t know miss manager knew Ushiwaka?” Hinata said.

”Oh you do know him then!”

”Well yeah,” Atsumu hissed.

”She went to Shiratorizawa?” Bokuto now asked.

”Yeah, my whole family did. Our parents are real hard-asses y’know? We could only go to the best of the best—“

”Fukurodani is better,” Bokuto muttered, now wondering how things might have went if you went there instead of Shiratorizawa.

”Yeah she actually looked there, but not only were Shiratorizawa’s academics a bit better their girl’s volleyball team was much more renowned than Fukurodani’s.”

”(Y/N) PLAYS VOLLEYBALL!!??” The three men yelled loudly, once again drawing the attention of everyone in the restaurant.

”Yes,” Ami hissed in annoyance, “And can you two keep it down— anyway, she was one of the top female libero’s in Japan, she had dreams about going pro but all the pro volleyball leagues always choose Alpha’s. So when that dream got crushed she studied business and sport’s management so she could still be involved with volleyball.“ She tapped her chin and looked up, wracking her brain for any other useful facts about you, “Oh— she’s also pretty into fitness. Takes Pilates classes almost everyday,” she snorted, “She’s also on a local women’s volleyball team and she also likes taking pole dancing classes—“

”(Y/N) is a stripper!?” Atsumu exclaimed.

Ami scowled, “No, idiot. She does it for exercise, she even had a pole installed in her room.”

Atsumu looked to Bokuto, “I’m suddenly not judging your taste in women anymore.”

Bokuto’s eyes sparkled in admiration— he could practically feel himself falling for you harder the more Ami divulged things about you. 

Bokuto suddenly slapped a hand down on the table, “How do I court her!?”

Ami smiled gleefully at the question, “Right. Let’s get into that now. Now Bokuto, as long as you listen to every word I say, I bet you’ll have (Y/N) wrapped around your finger by the end of the week—“

Atsumu scoffed, “It can’t be that easy—“

”Oh yes it can,” she had a devious look on her face, “Betas, as I’m sure you can tell, can’t pick up on Alpha or Omega courting cues. It goes right over their heads. And I know this because I spent many late nights on dating forums about both Alphas and Omegas who had tried courting a Beta in their life. It’s strange but they literally cannot pick up your intentions when you give them the typical courting gifts— I’m assuming you’ve been sticking with practical things such as socks or toothbrushes, or like full meals or whatever?”

He nodded quickly, “Yes, she’s accepted 54 of my gifts and rejected 45– are you sure she isn’t starting to pick up on my hints?” He asked eagerly, leaning forward in his seat.

”Hints?” Atsumu asked with a roll of his eyes, “More like flashing, neon signs.”

Ami sweat dropped, “Oh you are so very weird Bokuto— thank you for coming into my sister’s life. But no, she has no idea— well she might have an inkling now since I told her you were courting her.”

”You did!? What did she say!?”

”Wellll, she doesn’t really believe me and told me to drop the subject but she did get flustered so it looks like you have a very good shot.” She answered, “But anyway. On a biological level, Alphas give those gifts to Omegas to signal that they want to provide and take care of that Omega. But Betas don’t need to be taken care of in the same way. Alphas also give meals to Omegas because they subconsciously want them to have energy for heats and ruts that are spent together but once again, heats and ruts aren’t coded into Beta instincts—“

”I thought Beta’s didn’t have instincts?” Atsumu asked.

”No they do. They’re just different but I’ll get into that later. First let’s talk about the kinds of gifts that you should be giving her.”

Bokuto hung onto every single word that fell from her lips, leaning in even more, making the table dig into his pecs.

”Betas are big on their interests and hobbies, if you want to actually connect with one, you need to show an interest in the things they like. That shows that you’re interested in them and actually care about the things they care about.

”And as I said she’s big into fitness and women’s volleyball, she loves watching rom coms, she’s a big anime fan, what else… Oh! She’s obsessed with her cat ‘Mochi’— oh that’s another thing!” She exclaimed, “Beta’s have major sweet tooth’s, so instead of giving her lunches or dinners give her sweets. And if you give her homemade sweets she will literally be putty in your hands.”

”That’s if she even accepts it,” Atsumu remarked.

”Oh she will. I have never seen that girl not accept a sweet. Trust me, her sweet tooth will even trump her professionalism. I’ll text you a list of more specific things she likes as well as her favorite sweets.” She said, pulling out her phone and beginning to type out a list, “Spend some time thinking about the gifts, thoughtful gifts of something she likes is a sure sign for her to realize you’re into her.”

Ami sent the list, “I’ll send you more later tonight as I think of things. I think the last thing you need to know is she’s really receptive to acts of service. Now she will refuse at first and insist that she’s got whatever it is covered, but she’s lying. She’s very independent but she likes to feel like she’s being thought of or taken care of. Even if you just start with offering your help in any way, I’m sure that’ll be fine. Ya got all that?”

Bokuto nodded eagerly, “When do I scent her?”

Hinata, Atsumu, and Ami all groaned in frustration.

”Bokuto,” Ami hissed, “Scenting. Is. Not. Courting.” She said slowly. “Scenting her is completely one sided in this relationship, understand?”

Bokuto frowned, “…Yes… but all those other things will let her know I’m courting her?” 

“One hundred percent,” she grinned, “Oh and don’t give her these things in front of a crowd. She’s a very private person, if you want to see her professional side crumble then give her these gifts in private.”

”Okay!” Bokuto nodded eagerly.

”Aw,” Atsumu whined, “I was hopin’ I’d get a front row seat to this fiasco— how’s he even gonna know it’s workin’?”

”Oh he’ll know!” She yelled, “Getting her speechless and flustered is a great sign, especially because she prides herself on her professionalism. But that leads me into her instincts I mentioned before.”

Bokuto leaned in even more— and Atsumu did as well, both interested in hearing what a Beta’s instincts were.

”Beta’s are known to be calm and collected however when they’re around friends and family that they are close to they’ll be a lot more playful. It might take some time but you’ll know you’re close when she starts to try play fighting you or getting nippy.”

”Nippy?” Bokuto asked.

”Uh-huh,” she nodded, “Do you tackle her like you did earlier today often?”

”Everyday,” Atsumu groaned.

”Good! She probably likes that— though I’m sure she’d never admit it. So that can stay the same— honestly that was probably the only thing you were getting right.”

”So I did do something right!”

”Yup! And now one final piece of advice,” Bokuto leaned in even more, “I hate to admit it but Atsumu was right. Just come out and tell her that you have been courting her and you’d like to be in a relationship with her. She can be very dense so if you do that on top of everything I told you, she’ll be yours. Now I think that’s all the wisdom I can impart for now,” she finally said, standing up from her seat. “Do you guys have practice tomorrow?”

”Yes-!”

”Are you coming again!?” Hinata quickly cut Bokuto off, climbing to his feet as well.

”I think so! Just to make sure Bokuto doesn’t screw anything up.”

”Hey!”

”I’ll walk ya back home— it’s dangerous this time of night!” Atsumu exclaimed, scrambling from the booth and pulling Ami along with him.

”I can walk you too!” Hinata chirped and ran after the two, leaving Bokuto alone in the booth.

Bokuto’s smile never left his face, not even when their waiter had given him the check that he had to pay himself. 

He had some planning… and baking to do that night.

* * * *

Part 3

[piratadelamor]

skip and loafer ch. 53

shima seems to see romantic love as a combination of different attraction factors, where liking someone as a person (for their personality) can be compensated for other things, therefore your standarts are lower when you're romantically attracted to someone. the way he sees it, the highest form of steem you can have for someone is to like them as a person, where these other factors don't matter and what you truly value is solely their personality.

i think it's interesting how mukai introduces this conversation by building a hierarchy of feelings, where romantic love stands on top of the feelings of friendship and of liking someone as a person, because that's one concept i've been personally focusing on deconstructing in my life. it's precisely by differenciating these types of feelings and putting them on a hierarchy that so many people end up in romantic relationships with people they don't really like, or why so many people drift away from their friendships when they start dating someone.

through everyone else's eyes, shima's feelings are romantic, and he doesn't feel like they are, because romance to him means something else. the lines between liking someone as a person, as a friend and as a lover are blurred. and listen, that's how they're supposed be. to love someone as a lover is supposed to mean you love them as a friend and as a person as well. a friend and a lover shouldn't be too different, and liking them as a person is supposed to be the core of both feelings.

i don't think shima is being innocent, like i've seen so many people saying on twt since the chapter came out. i think he's touching something very deep about relationships in our society that so many stories that focus on romance fail to address. in most of these stories, romance is the final goal. that's where most of them end. that's not the case here. i was already surprised when mitsumi and shima started dating, and even more surprised when they went back to being friends. that's not the usual narrative for this kind of story. because here, it doesn't seem like this hierarchy matters. and i think it's beautiful and i think it's HUGE how both shima and mitsumi value their friendship above everything else. not only them, because friendship is one of the main themes of this story. both as a dynamic and as a type of love as well.

but people have different perspectives on love and how love feels for them. it's different for mitsumi, for shima, for mika, for fumi. the way you're taught about love in your family or as a child in general has a big role on shaping that. we saw the matter of mitsumi having received lots of love in her family and childhood friends being brought up before as an explanation for her confidence. then, on the other hand, that's why we see shima acklowledging this on the next panels:

we know a few things about shima's family and their complicated relationships. shima never realized his little brother liked him because he saw his behavior as coldness or indifference, when he was actually being considerate of the distance shima was putting between them himself. he felt the need to please his mother by acting in order for her to love him, or for him to be worthy of her love, because their relationship was too anchored on exploitation. his father was having an affair, which not only made shima watch the failure of his parents marriage but also perceive romantic love as something superficial (as in "people break up and move on to the next person") and possibily as something that pushes people away. then shima's first girlfriend only liked him because of his looks, and so many others confessed to him without barely even knowing him. how could shima trust his own feelings after all of that? if he spent most of his formative years in an environment of appearences where love was tied to selfishness, interest, volatility, coldness, pain? shima learned to supress all his feelings and be a people pleaser as a survival mechanism. don't get too attached, live up to others expectations, keep your distance, smile and wave, bottle it all up. he is a kid that doesn't know a single thing about love and is scared as hell of it. love feels as if something is about to break.

that's why liking someone as a person feels more important to him. and that's not only the highest feeling he can have for someone else, i think this is the highest form of feeling he thinks someone could have for him too. it's the kind of feeling he thinks his own mother couldn't have, because acting was more important to her than who he actually was. it's the feeling he unconciously doesn't allow others to feel for him, because he never shows people who he truly is. so shima understands mitsumi's words as a love confession back in chapter 41. she didn't say "i love you", she said "that's what i love about you". and he asks her out, not only because he already knows mitsumi is different, so it seems more reasonable to give it a try, but also because he thinks this is how it's supposed to go. this is what he thinks it's expected to give her in return.

when society puts romance on the top of the relationships/feelings hierarchy, it builds an insane amount of expectations around it. i think it's crazy how friendships feel so free while romantic relationships feel so enclosured. they have too many rules. you're supposed to do this, and that, and behave in certain ways. if you start dating a friend then suddenly your friendship dynamic changes. a boyfriend or a girlfriend have responsibilities that friends don't have. it's a weight. i can't imagine a person like shima feeling any other way about a romantic relationship. for him, this is a big, big weight. that's why he puts an emphasis when he says "i thought that i could be a 'boyfriend' too". a boyfriend is a social role. when he phrases it like that, he's using the word "boyfriend" as an outside concept: he doesn't know what it means to him, he only knows what it means for everyone else. and that's not something he can do.

mukai is absolutely right when he tells shima he shouldn't be going out with anyone. shima isn't ready to be that close to anyone, not even his closest friends. i can't even describe how sad i felt when mukai said this to him:

shima is just so, so lonely...

but this doesn't mean that shima's supposed to become ready to be a "boyfriend" on those terms. i just think he's still trying to figure out what all of these things mean to him. and the good thing is that mitsumi is also trying to figure out these things too. the difference between them is that mitsumi is a few steps ahead, because she already understands what friendship love feels like. and when it comes to that, she gave us one of the most special love confessions i've ever seen.

so many people talked about this scene already, but now, in the light of chapter 53, her saying "i really like this person" has a whole new meaning. this is the most honest love shima has ever received from anyone. no romantic confession could top that. no romantic feeling could heal his wounds the way these words from mitsumi can. this is a treasure shima can't afford to lose.

we're taught that romantic love will save us. that it will make us the happiest, that it completes us. we grow up believing that we can't survive without it. what we really can't survive without are our friends... skip and loafer is putting friendship above everything else, but more than that, it is questioning how romantic love is supposed to feel. some people feel it, some people don't. i think most of us don't really know what it is. we think we do because we read enough, we saw enough movies, we listened to enough love songs. i think i felt it a few number of times in my life but everytime i felt it for someone new i asked myself, was it really love before? what is it, really? if i never read those books or saw thoses movies or listened to those songs. would i recognize it? would i know it better? would it even exist?

aren't shima's feelings for mitsumi already valuable enough? big enough, true enough? would they change if he called them romantic? mitsumi has SO much to teach him about love, about himself, about others. their encounter is so beautiful and so rich. we see how much he's changing, how many new things he's finally starting to understand about himself, how many important steps he's taken since they met. is finding romance at the end really the most important thing for their story?

[dotster001]

A Sagittarius Chaos Throuple

Summary: Rook x Idia x FEM! Reader. What a polyamorous relationship looks like for NRC's hottest Sagittarius'. Requested by @stygianoir

CW: Fem Reader.

A/N: If people like this, I can do the other signs, (I'm Libra in case you're wondering 😂) and I can make a gender neutral version. Just let me know!

Capricorn Aquarius Pisces Aries Taurus Gemini Cancer-coming soon

How it happens.

It all starts with Rook. We all know he's been trying to "get to know" Idia for a while. (let's be real. He already knows Idia. He just wants an excuse for an in that won't scare him)

When you come around, and he falls for you, it diverts him from Idia for a while. Obviously, Rook makes the first move. After he learns everything about you, that is. Now that he's got his beautiful girlfriend, you'd think he'd be satisfied, right? Nope.

In most cases, the reader proposes the Poly relationship. But this time is different. Roi de Ta Chambre is too alluring for poor Rook! If only his beautiful Mademoiselle Trickster could see it too!

He pushes you in the right direction, getting you into the games Idia is into, so that he will let you in. Then he joins on the escapades, as your boyfriend, thereby getting Idia comfortable with him as well.  After a while, he sits you both down and proposes a poly relationship. The trick to pulling it off is comparing it to an anime Idia has been really into lately, so that he isn't overwhelmed by the idea. 

What these three Sagittarius' get up to.

All three of you stay off the radar. But one day Rook is telling you about all the juicy things he hears when he hides in vents and trees, and now all three of you are doing it. Idia has created a smoke bomb, so that when you three gremlins get caught, you can make a hasty retreat.  While Rook is a little disappointed that his street cred as being undetectable is going out the window, getting gossip with his beloveds is definitely worth it.

Study sessions? Study sessions. All three of you work hard on your homework and study together, and sometimes, after that, you start studying up on one of your hyperfixations. Idia's new video game? You're all researching cheat codes, lore, and secrets for hours. Rook's new target? You're studying the school layouts and plotting how he's going to get them. 

Romance among Sagittarius is very affectionate, and it's no different here. It takes a bit for Idia to get past his insecurities, but once he does, he always wants a kiss from both of you for everything.  

Top kiss request quotes,

"Loves, I just killed that boss. Praise me."

"Rook, you forgot to give me a goodnight kiss yesterday, so now you owe me."

"If I don't have a lover kissing each of my cheeks in ten seconds, I'm going to hack your phones."

Meanwhile, Rook makes sure that you all get cuddle time at least once a week. He likes watching his partners fall asleep with his arms around them. 

He also sends you both off with a heated kiss before every class. Vil is this close to giving Rook another talk about PDA.

Rook teaches you both archery. When he realizes his throuple is made up solely of Sagittarius, he realizes you all need to be hunters. Under his guidance, the three of you become a menace to society.

Communication is great amongst you three. If something's upsetting someone, it's out in the open immediately. All three of you are very blunt about your feelings, but also very understanding. So resolutions are arrived at quickly.

Dates tend to be in Idia's room. You and Rook pretend it's for his comfort, but the reality is that none of you want to spend a lot of money on a date that you can go to in VR for free.  

Overall, it's a surprisingly happy trio (for everyone but Vil, who does not enjoy you and Idia enabling Rook's bad habits) You all work together to make sure the throuple stays happy and mentally stimulated, and cause some chaos together. What more could you ask for?

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

im having a crisis and i was just. hoping for some insight!! if this isn't the place to ask feel free to ignore and delete!! thanks

i think i might me aro but i'm not sure. i'm 17 and i haven't felt any romantic atttraction (ever? i can remember ONE time in elementary school but literally.. i barely remember) but oh lord. i want to. i've dated people but not because i was attracted to them and i asked first, but because they asked me and i thought it might work out. i'm not sure if anyone can be... involuntarily aromantic? so i thought i would ask. many thanks.

I'm sorry you're having a difficult time, Anon. If you haven't experienced romantic attraction, or possibly did once, but a long time ago, it is possibly you may be aro. Sometimes people do start experiencing romantic attraction in their late teens or very early 20's, but the older you get the more likely it is you're on the aro spectrum.

If by involuntarily aromantic, you mean people who really don't want to be aro, but who's experiences can be described as being on the aromantic spectrum, than yes, that does happen. Some people do have a hard time accepting themselves, especially since we live in a society that pushes the message that romance and romantic love are incredibly important and fulfilling (sometimes the most important and fulfilling) experience someone can have.

That said self acceptance is possible, the first step is rejecting that messaging. It helps that it's not true, while romance and romantic love are an experience that some people find important and fulfilling, it's far from the only one, and it's not one that's been important to everyone. Similar to things like religion, having children, having a passion (for example creating art, helping animals, etc), etc. There are things in life that give people feelings of meaning and fulfillment, but what those things aren't always the same for everyone. Even alloromantic people (that is people who are not aromantic), often find it helpful not to look at romance as the be all and end all since that's just not how it is for everyone, and also it creates a lot of pressure that can lead to unhealthy relationship balances. Romance is a thing some people enjoy and get a lot out of, but it's not the only thing.

The other part is learning to see aromanticism not as something that's about limiting yourself, but instead about giving yourself the freedom to do what's right for you. Aromantic describes how you feel internally, but it doesn't mean you can't do what you want if it's what you actually want and enjoy. For example, if you want to date people romantically, you can still do that. You mentioned you've already tried dating a few times, if you've enjoyed that experience or found those relationships fulfilling, you can keep dating.

On the other side of things, if you didn't enjoy dating, aromantic as a label is there to tell you it's OK to not enjoy dating. There are other types of life partners (Queerplatonic Relationships for example) if having a life partner is important to you. Or maybe you want to focus on other kinds of relationships (it's a myth that only romantic relationships are deep or meaningful, or that nobody values platonic relationships). Or maybe there's something else entirely that's important to you that you'd rather focus your energy on. Sometimes I look at being romance avese (so not just aromantic, but averse to romance on top of it) like not liking chocolate. Some people treat chocolate like it's the best food in the world, better than sex, etc. Some people just don't like the taste, and no matter how much they try and foce themselves to eat it, they'll probably never have that same experience as the people who love it. But there probably is other food they enjoy or other things that give them joy. It's OK to just not like chocolate or to find it just OK.

So even if you're just questioning, and even if you do start experiencing romantic attraction eventually, I would recommend trying to learn these lessons. And trying to see aromanticism as more of a neutral outcome rather than something to be afraid of. Remember too that no matter what you can do what you want, and if you do enjoy romantic relationships, and want to keep doing romantic things you can. If you don't enjoy romance, you will find things and relationships that do matter to you.

Seeking out media with aromantic characters (you can google book and podcast recs for a decent selection), or seeking out aromantic blogs, spaces, etc. can also help you see aromanticism in a more neutral and less scary light as well.

And of course if you have more questions, or want to talk more, this ask box is always open.

All the best, and good luck!

[writingforaliens]

I don't really subscribe to the "Mystra groomed Gale" fan theory (we know Larian is playing fast and loose with official Faerun timelines, but she only reappeared in 1487). Their relationship was more along the lines of a PhD candidate and their department chair is one of the top researchers in the field and their advisor, who initiates the relationship. (Or maybe he's among the top researchers, but she's the one who controls funding and grants and publishing and conferences.) He walked into that relationship flattered and thrilled and proud, only to realize after a while that Mystra is holding his metaphorical grades and thesis and future research opportunities hostage. And what is he if not his genius intellect?

Mystra's attention was flattering, but she could just as easily move on to the next hot young genius with the Weave. So he has to do the only thing he knows he is good for: be a genius with it. He wants knowledge (don't we all), she's rightfully gatekeeping it, and he knows that if he pushes, she'll toss him aside, frustrated with him. We get the impression that she only told him to stop wanting, but didn't give any reason why. Maybe Gale, in hubris, didn't listen. But no matter. Gale is convinced he's only good for his Magic, and Mystra is only with him for it, so he tries to do what any of us would do: impress her.

Why does Gale believe that he's only good for his Magic? Because society groomed him. Society viewed him as the genius wizard. Teachers only praised his abilities. He gets attention not for his other skills or personality traits, but because he's an eight year old who can cast Fireball with ease at at time when Mystra has barely started reconstituting herself. Society taught him the only thing people noticed was his skill. Look around at how many former gifted kids hit walls doing undergrad or grad school, don't understand how to take notes or how to study because it's always been innate, and burn out. Being able to read collegiate materials is no longer impressive when everyone is reading collegiate materials. A huge part of the identity of gifted kids, praised since childhood on their academic talents, gets lost when they hit this wall or realize they're no longer special. (Trust me, being teachers' pet and doing top-notch academically gives you an ego. Doubly so if your family are academics, which we have some evidence that Gale's family is at least moderately wealthy and/or connected with other mages.)

Is Mystra's relationship with ANY of her Chosen a good thing? I'd still say no, unless they both can keep it platonic and mentoring. (I had a great professor in college who did just that: mentored me. My high school physics teacher is still a friend. He was a guest at my wedding.) As soon as romance or sex enters that relationship, it's gonna be a bad time, even if the romance is one-sided on the part of the mortal. It's inherently difficult, shaky ground for a relationship, because of the power dynamics. If you piss her off enough, she can take your connection to the Weave away, and the closer you are to the situation, the more likely you are to think someone deserves punishment. And if she does punish you, it feels like not just a fall from grace but also like you are particularly a problem. There are evil mages all over, and Mystra hasn't taken their powers (the Weave is True Neutral, but still...you think every mortal mage is going to understand that if you eliminate the evil users it actually destabilizes the Weave?). She's the only god who can't really punish those that dramatically deviate from her alignment, because of what she is the god of. Think about that. Every other god can say "you are not following my rules, get out". She can only say that to her clerics and paladins (5e can kiss my ass, paladins need a patron to hear their promise), maybe to her Chosen, but certainly not to anyone who uses her power.

I love Gale, but this really puts things in a different light.

[nijigasakilove]

“Standing tall not hanging her head blossoming up to the sky, that’s who you are dahlia” 😢 beautiful and intimate scenes at the end with Wolf and Dahliya finally opening up to one another.

This episode reminded me how little they actually knew about one another. Yea, they’re good friends and have quite a few experiences with one another now, but only surface level stuff. The meeting with Wolf’s general and other top brass actually ended up being the catalyst for Dahliya and Wolf getting closer so it’s a good thing Wolf made her feel awkward there I guess lol

Everyone being shocked to learn about foot fungus and how they need to wash their nasty ass feet was killing me. It’s amazing how far we’ve come as a society to make advances in personal hygiene. The military guys might not have known how to prevent foot fungus until Dahliya came around, but they know a thing or two about keeping women happy so it all worked out in the end with them pushing Wolf to make things up with Dahliya.

A couple interesting things I took away from Wolf and Dahliya’s no holds barred honesty session is that 1:Dahliya doesn’t really remember her life on earth and thinks of it as a nightmare, which working for many Japanese companies is.. I wonder if she’ll ever get her memories back. 2:Her mom and dad story was really sad man, I imagine her mom was forced to leave the dad because her parents didn’t want her marrying him. 3: Wolf’s mom dying to protect his brother and his mom is definitely a tuff situation and I totally get why they had a rocky relationship now. That’s pretty awkward

Feels like Dahliya and Wolf took a huge step forward today, I’m liking the slow burn of their relationship and hope they continue building so that when it does come time for that inevitable romance it’ll feel so well deserved for both :). One last episode next week :/

[bokettochild]

I would love to see your plushies collection! How many of them have names?

All of them!

And here they are!

These are Creamer and Angus! The trusty steeds of my stuffed animal collection! They didn't talk like the others, but they had some personality; both loyal, Creamer (the palomino) more friendly and Angus (the black one) more guarded.

These two are Katy and Lucy/Andy. Katy (grey) is the more timid one, and was given to me by my younger brother. Lucy is a friendly and outgoing person, but when I made her a boy, 'Andy' he was more of a jokester and risk taker. Lucy/Andy was given to me for the Christmas my dad was overseas, in my stocking. My mom had an identical one that I loved to bits, so she got me my own.

Katy is the twin sister to my elder sibling's identical cat "Kitty"(very original, I know)

Fun fact! These two kitties have magnets in their paws and foreheads! So they can hold hands, play peek-a-boo and stick to anything metal!

These two are Kittiwink and Rocky! They're BlueNoses™ and I think they're from England?

Fun fact! These two were also gifts from my dad when he was deployed. That same Christmas, he sent these over for us, and my mom let us choose which ones we wanted. My siblings all went first, so Rocky and Kittiwink were the last two when me and my roommate (current and at that time) got our turns. Because I was the only one who had cleaned our room that night, I got first pick and chose Kittiwink, and my sister got Rocky, but was upset because he was "ugly".

Kittiwink was later burned at the stake (put on top of a light bulb and melted) by my toddler brother, so the one I have now is actually one my dad got me when I was 14, for my birthday.

Kiitiwink is a timid and quiet deary, with good manners and a lot of cowardice. Come to think of it, she's a lot like how I write Ravio nowadays; caring but cowardly, and never eager to step on toes, but willing to push matters or tease if she feels comfortable.

Rocky was a bully, originally, because my sister hated him, but when he came to me (because she didn't like him) I made him a studious little nerd with a love of astronomy! He and Kittiwink have been a couple since then, although I have at times elected to cast them as siblings when needed. Their romance is very timid and sweet, but very classy <3

These three are Lewis (Grey), Susanna (White) and Roy (Orange). Lewis was a garage sale find, and Susana and Roy I bought online. I had a cat just like Susana when I was seven, that I most cleverly named "White" and whom was my favorite stuffy for forever. When my dad was deployed over Christmas, my mom was actually almost ready to pop with my second brother, so we had to travel out of state to stay with some friends of hers while the baby was born, because our regular sitters all got hung up with something and we had no family in that part of the country. I left White in the living-room window to greet me when I got home, but she wasn't there when I got back. My siblings tried to convince me that she was so old that she disintegrated :(

I bought Susana when I was older, in hopes of replacing my beloved stuffy, but she wasn't the same except in looks. Where White was sweet and gentle, Susana is stern, stuffy and very proper, with an elder sibling like need to correct other people and keep everyone behaving according to the rules of society.

Roy is her lover, a charismatic and charming leader sort who ended up as arm candy more than not because I had no great male role models to inspire him, and thus he was just there as...arm candy.

Lewis is a stupid and lovable bafoon and Roy's best friend. He occasionally played a villain or henchman, but was also a goof and jokester when he wasn't kidnapping or enslaving innocents or committing war crimes.

This is Susana. Another stocking stuffer, but this one hated. She's very cute, but don't let her face fool you, she's made of cherpa! A most detestable ick material that always makes me uncomfortable. For this crime, she was made the Karen of this world, and an all around bully and entitled jerk to anyone and everyone for no reason whatsoever. Why, you ask? Because this way I didn't have to touch her very much :)

These two are Jacob and Jingle! Two of a trio, the third (their elder brother) belongs to my elder sister, and is named John. their last name is Heimer-Schmitt >:)

Yes, we sang that song incessantly whenever this trio came into play "John-Jacob-Jingeheimer-Schmitt!". They're children of the local butcher, these three were honest but poor and always provided backup, care, and support for those around them. John was madly in love with the aristocratic Kitty, but his siblings were content with their lot and friendly with most but not attempting to climb the social ladder. Jingle is sweet and motherly and Jacob somewhat clueless but well meaning.

For no reason whatsoever, Jingle was the only one with a cockney accent.

This is William. He is a classist aristocrat with an attitude problem. My second elder sister gave him to me when I was eight, for my birthday. I wanted to name him Miracle and make him a girl, but his perpetual scowl made it barely believable and he quickly became the stern, serious and somewhat antagonistic figure he is now known as. Sometimes a villain, sometimes not, but never quite the hero, he was never able to land a lady, despite the fact that he was commonly portrayed as quite the catch.

These two are Martin (mouse) and Mattie (bunny). They're both hand-me-downs with tragically already established personalities belonging to my second elder sister. Bitter rivals for no apparent reason and hardly equal, Martin is a weary but resiliant fighter and skillful in his craft, and Mattie is a gluttonous oaf who lacks any real grounds to stand a threat to anyone, especially with his nonsensically poor attempts at manipulation.

Mattie is absolutely adorable, but my every attempt to redeem him into a likable character failed after he came into my possession, du to bias from my playmates, and he is now doomed to be thought of as the stupid villain forever :(

Martin is cardboard and boring, and his charming rabbit ears were butchered in the first of many experiments by my sister to try altering him. He is now a mouse :(

This is Daisy! One of a trio of rabbits belonging to my eldest sister, my room-mate and myself, she's basically me! She's well meaning but unfortunately quick to charge ahead. Inquisitive but not as insightful as likely would be best, and with a good heart but not always a full understanding of how things actually work.

Her sisters, Blossom (elder sister) and Violet (room-mate) and she are all BlueNoses™ as well. Blossom is quiet, delicate, timid, and a coward, and Violet is bold, brash, independent and possibly gender fluid, apparently (room-mate's words).

Daisy came to me on December 10 as a replacement after my brother burned my beloved BlueNose™ at the stake when I was small. I loved bunnies a lot as a kid, so when my dad told me to choose a replacement for my ruined stuffy, Daisy was my first pick. I named her after my mom's favorite flower and she's been my favorite stuffy since before she even arrived.

This last trio is Dusky (left), Sierra (center) and Blackie (right). The two dogs are hand me downs from the sisters on either side of me in the age line up, and Sierra was also a hand-me-down from the second elder sibling.

These three form a small detective agency in the animal world we played in. Sierra is the chipper, friendly, but devious lead detective. She's bright and bubbly, but quick and dangerous when need be. Yes, she is a skunk, but I never let it bother me and she's been a favorite with almost all the babies in the family.

Dusky is her work-partner, a more serious, and somewhat butch female cop with a no-nonsense attitude but a soft spot for her team-mate. They're a good team, although unlikely friends and despite my younger sister's insistence, they are not lesbians, just besties.

Blackie is their commander and a stern and serious guy who mostly didn't show up in games except either to arrest someone, guard something, or occasionally to drop the role as the gruff cop and take on the position of the loyal soldier to a cruel overlord.

So yeah! that's all of them!

Or most anyway, I've collected a few random ones over the years, but none of them have ever been payed with because i was already grown up when I got them

[starry-skies-116]

Cassidy and QPP’s!CassEvan Headcanons~:

Her full name is now in my AU Cassidy Zhang Boseman! (in honor of her Blueycapsules Counterpart lol)

She’s Asian (Filipino-Japanese) American, her mother having immigrated from Manila and her Father, half-Japanese and half-caucasian, being from Tokyo. She’s also trilingual, being sufficiently fluent in Japanese and Tagalog with English being her main language!

She has a twin brother named Andrew, and he’s the older twin, despite her being the more sensible, strict and straightforward one.

Both Cassidy and Andrew are 10 years old and have been childhood friends with the MCI gang (+Samantha) and Evan since they were very young, perhaps around their first year of preschool.

Andrew and Cassidy look almost alike except for the assigned gender (AMAB and AFAB respectively). And also, Andrew frequently nicknames Cassidy annoying monikers. Why? Well, it’s just a brother’s duty, I suppose.

Librafluid/Agender Girl intersex AFAB swag we love it- but this is the 80’s, so I think the appropriate label for this time period would be Genderqueer! And of course, Cassidy’s closeted about how she doesn’t really associate herself with her gender besides the she/her pronouns.

Her associated emblem/crest is the Scale of Justice with the Feather of Ma’at on top of it- just like everyone else, her soul and life force/remnant are associated closely with this emblem’s power and meaning, and just as a halved shard of Evan’s spirit bears the triskelion upon his chest during his time tethered to Fredbear, Cassidy bears the same symbol of the scale and feather atop her chest when she takes on a semi-corporeal form as a spirit.

Much like Evan, she’s pan-oriented aroace (aegosexual/nebulasexual and aromantic), and doesn’t understand how romance or relationship hierarchies really works! And asexual and aromantic acknowledgement, let alone terms for the Aspec community, didn’t really exist during the 80’s, so she simply assumes that she’s not interested in people in that way, or that she’s simply ‘too young’, despite everyone else around her age (including her brother) developing crushes.

Cassidy has savant syndrome (hypercalculia) that covers up her OCPD and autism, so her parents aren’t really the best parents for their non-neurotypical children, saying things like ‘why can’t you be normal?’ or ‘you’re just like everyone else, stop being so dramatic!’

Her favorite color is yellow, and her favorite animatronic WAS Springbonnie… at least, before the incident.

Her parents used to make her take a LOT of extracurricular activities and classes, so she would be enrolled in about three programs per year at minimum, one of which would be playing the violin. She has a strange love-hate relationship with the violin- she would be forcing herself to play it, to repeatedly perfect it, drowning herself in the routine to push out her thoughts.

Can we just all say that Cassidy is queerplatonically/alterously MADLY AND UTTERLY in love with Evan and always has been?

She feels a particular type of deep, intimate and unshakeable connection towards Evan due to their similar struggles, and they have an incredibly close kinship unbeknownst to everyone else that only continues to blossom and expand beautifully after their death. She knows Evan struggles with terrible nightmares, and Evan knows her perfectionism, desire for control, anxiety and rituals stems from a personality disorder. Instead of rejecting each other like everyone else has done, they show each other compassion, affection, love and understanding.

Cassidy and Evan LOVE to infodump to each other about various topics! Sometimes they compliment each other on their appearance and their most ‘objectively attractive’ traits. They talk sometimes about the comical absurdity of amatonormativity and allonormativity, homophobia, transphobia and gender roles/expectations that society imposes onto people. 

Other times the infodump is about creative writing ideas, DND, astrological and psychological theories, theories about the reasons behind historical events, different types of animals that could’ve theoretically existed in prehistoric times, TV shows and videogames, stuffed animals and books, movies, future plans and possibilities and events, philosophical questions, and much, MUCH more. They’re incredibly chatty, affectionate and lovey-dovey (platonic) around one another.

Sometimes they chat about paganism, goetic demons and angels and casual worship/witchcraft and theology and gnosticism/other religions just to scare their conservative, mostly Christian community of Hurricane lol-

When Evan and Cassidy get to fourth grade, they start showing each other gestures of physical affection, as well as paying each other visits that society in the 80’s would consider ‘romantic courting’.

They start hugging each other, occasionally giving each other kisses on the cheek, forehead, nose, etc. They also start performing secret handshakes and small fistbumps as greetings, occasionally calling each other petnames (the most common ones being ‘Ev’ and ‘Cass’), cuddling and snuggling up against each other on the school bus and when reading/writing/sitting next to each other in general, they’d pass more notes to each other than anyone else in their friend group, and cutest of all they’d bring each other GIFTS!

They would bring each other bouquets of yellow roses, blue hydrangeas and lilies (Evan hates the smell of roses but can make an exception for yellow ones since they’re basically eye candy), and they would also bring each other goody baskets full of sweets, new clothes, homecooked meals their parents would make, toys, books, brooches, figurines and fake jewelry, and one time they even gave each other matching friendship bracelets! 

Cassidy knows that Evan sometimes forgets to eat entirely so she brings him food, most often authentic Filipino or Japanese cuisine so he looks forward to eating a bit more. They also sometimes just… visit each other and just spend quality time together like two platonically-in-love kiddos always do, but they can never call each other because William put the phone in a place where Evan’s not tall enough to reach it, and Cassidy isn’t allowed to use the phone without supervision.

Naturally both Evan’s and Cassidy’s siblings poke and prod fun at them for ‘having a crush’ and their only response back is for them to get out of here with that lukewarm take. Their relationship transcends the boundaries of what friendship and romance means. Yeah, they love each other in their own way that’s not ‘crushing’ on each other, so what of it?

In the Alive!AU, Evan begins to attend therapy after the incident and takes medication- by the time they get to 8th grade, he and Cassidy are in a straight-passing relationship that they dictate on their own. They plan to live with each other and adopt kids of their own, maybe even two dogs. They frequently go on dates and end up living together as roomates in college! (They have to stage a marriage just as an excuse to hang out and devour all the food there).

Their relationship even in my main AU only continues to blossom and grow after death, and they end up reuniting and living a happy life together with Evan/Gregory’s siblings at the end post-Security Breach.

All in all, they are sUCH a queerplatonic power couple that breaks every single definition of a relationship. 10 x 326^230/10.

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC Review: A Wicked Game by Kate Bateman

4/5. Releases 12/27/2022.

Morgan Davies and Harriet Montgomery have grown up in families that at odds--but while they don't get along, they aren't quite enemies. Before Morgan goes off to sea, Harriet promises him that if he comes back alive, he'll get to give her three kisses--wherever he wants. Years later, he returns after being imprisoned with a whole new perspective. He wants Harriet for his own, not as a friend or an enemy, and he'll use those three kisses as a good little jumping off point for his plans to win her.

So to be super real, this one doesn't have like, a huge PLOTTY PLOT PLOT thing. It's mostly a sexy romantic comedy that focuses on two people who are fun and likable and hot and don't have deep internal issues aside from not quite knowing how to go from friendly rivals to lovers. (I mean, he totally knows how, she's just a bit less experienced.) And normally, I think that would bug me, a supreme lover of angst and fucked upedness and drama. But here? It really didn't. It was pretty delightful. Why?

What Worked:

--Morgan and Harriet have great chemistry and read like two people who've known each other since childhood. And even if they've never been like, confidants, they know one another deeply due to that proximity, and know how to push each other's buttons.

--Tonally speaking, their relationship absolutely had the vibe of the "This Is My Idea" from The Swan Princess, which I know is deeply ingrained in the minds of many romance readers of a certain age. If you liked that, you'll like this. Morgan and Harriet are that without the arranged marriage, and with a good deal more emotional maturity (but not so much that the story is boring) and no insta-love. It's pretty clear that these two have had a thing for each other since they were kids, and it just took some good old-fashioned imprisonment for Morgan to go "ARRANGE THE MARRIAGE!!!"

--The supporting cast is hilarious (I assume we'll get a Rhys book... I mean his name is fucking Rhys and he doesn't wanna get married...?) and anyone who enjoys "everyone can see it" will have a good time with them.

--This is actually a pretty hot trad historical romance, I've gotta say, especially for one that's a bit lower angst. There's really good flirting, you get some light blindfold action, a lot of foreplay--I mean, the three kisses are essentially a sex bet. And it never feels like Harriet is in over her head, though Morgan is obviously much more experienced than she is and knows exactly what he's doing with this three kisses shit; Bateman does some maneuvering to make sure it feels super consensual. Which, honestly, isn't always a must for me as a reader, but it's a must for the tone of this book. And then you get some last minute shenanigans that I didn't expect but was super into.

--Great grand gesture, much appreciate.

--Going back to that sex stuff though... How refreshing to have a good bit of sex in the book, acknowledge Harriet's worries about ruination... and then go "well, shit happens". I'm so over historical romance reviewers (some of which I'm sure will dog this book out) acting as if nobody had sex before marriage in Days of Yore. And everyone who did was found out and ruined.

First off, as with today, money and the right connections can get you a fuckton of leeway. The Duchess of Devonshire literally had a child out of wedlock with a future prime minister, and with the right maneuvering, got back to her top spot in society in no time. And she was not the only one. People could be scandalous, and still received, because you had no choice but to receive them. And considering how much historical romance focuses on the upper crust...

Aside from that, it's just like--cool, so we'll accept all the dukes and the hot people with all their teeth and the lack of STIs but we won't accept people fucking out of wedlock just for fun? Okay!!!

But that's a huge digression, and I use it to say that I loved how this book treated sex. Harriet lets Morgan do stuff to her because she's curious and it's fun and let's be real, she's highkey in love with him even if she doesn't realize it at the moment. Harriet does some reckless shit because it feels good and she knows how to get away with it. One of my favorite parts of this book was someone realizing that Shit Went Down and going "listen, lots of people do that and we just don't talk about it, you're hardly the first one to go for it". Like... what a nice change of pace. Someone fucked out of wedlock in 18whatever it wasn't the end of the world.

What Didn't Work (For Me):

--There was a last minute plot device danger at the very end that lasted for like 30 seconds, and it felt pretty forced. This is an emotional book, not a plotty book. And that's cool! It wasn't a big detractor, it just didn't super work for me.

If you kinda wanna have fun and read about people who've known each other for years sniping at one another and then raw dogging in a fun environment, this is a great book for you. And a great series--I have yet to read the first, but I totally am, and A Daring Pursuit was really fun as well.

But for reals, don't dare a Davies if you want to keep your tender virginity intact.

Thank you to Netgalley and St. Martin's Press for a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

[kingbuffy]

I think the main reason I dislike Dracula/Mina being the accepted romance in many Dracula and just plain vampire media is because there's just no backup for it. Like it's so forced. You're telling me that you read Dracula right? And the possible pairing you got out of it was Dracula/Mina??? I mostly blame a century's worth of film adaptations for this.

You can get some mileage out of Dracula/Lucy at least, I think there's a lot of unsaid potential in how Lucy possibly felt; given that I believe she's the perfect parallel to Dracula, and what does it mean that he's turned the good version of himself into a monster? Hatred for the innocent person he never was? Or resentment for what he could’ve been? This is mostly speculation since the og text doesn't go into that kind of direction, but look at what I got just at the idea of them. Dracula/Mina have no depth, no layers and no hints at what they could be going forward had they actually gotten together.

And don't get me started on how much more Dracula/Jonathan have. The beginning of Dracula, with Jonathan's pov trapped the Count's castle, is the best part of the book in my opinion. It's the scariest and most tense section, and is where the queer subtext is at its most hefty. While I won't outwardly state Bram Stoker's sexuality, since there's really no way to know for certainty where his arrow pointed, there's good evidence that he wasn’t straight, and was in great agony about that. I think his internalized homophobia is what gave us that first part of Dracula. And I truly think that Dracula/Jonathan's relationship is both psychosexual and heartbreaking. There's just soo much you can do with the text given. Unlike Dracula/Mina, there's a story here. The struggles that Jonathan went through during his stay were so raw and emotional, him wrestling with both fearing and lusting for Dracula. Jonathan developed a friendship with Dracula on top of that, a friendship that was ultimately betrayed by the monster he was simultaneously repulsed and drawn to. This all culminates in my favorite line in the book (and maybe ever?): "I doubt; I fear; I think strange things which I dare not confess to my own soul."

I mean that line is just so real??? So obvious but so layered?? I'm surprised the British censors didn't burst in nightsticks a-blazin ala Picture of Dorian Gray style.

Jonathan could never understand his feelings around Dracula, he could only cry out against the allure that should be tucked away and hidden if it continues to dare to exist. Jonathan's stay in Count Dracula's castle is the rawest expression of doubt and horror at something society has told him is just as disturbing as a bloodsucking monster. Bram Stoker really showed his hand there. Jonathan discovered something about himself that he didn't understand, and lost a friend in the process. I truly think Dracula/Jonathan should be more recognized because all the pieces are there. But much like Bram Stoker's own take on queerness, movies and adaptations could never show a queer relationship to the people, that would be too much for a vampire film. So instead a constant stream of Dracula adaptations push a romance with the next best option, the man's wife. Despite the fact that there were no interesting ideas or consequences, like Dracula/Lucy, nor any of the sexual or even romantic tension, like Dracula/Jonathan.

Not to mention that Dracula doesn't really have a romance with anyone in the og book, but I get it, romance brings in the people. It's just really annoying that Mina has to be forced into something that just doesn't fit her at all. The fact that it's just widley accepted that the great vampiric romance is Dracula/Mina. Vampires have always been wrapped up in grey morality, queerness, and sex; human monsters. Their appeal is the release of society's barriers, to truly become the monster that everyone said we already were. Dracula/Mina have none of that.

[furiousgoldfish]

Tactics of narcissistic abuse

Love Bombing & Mirroring are tactics to gain your favour. These will come from a narcissist you’re just getting to know and they’re trying to convince you they’re your perfect partner, soulmate, best friend, ideal lover. Love bombing is showering you with over-the-top affection and support, they’re likely to see what works best on you, then give you just that. They’ll convince you that you’re special and make you feel special, whether it’s with attention, gifts, promises, love phrases, or making you look and feel very good in front of other people. If they can spin this as fate or destiny, they will. You have one lucky coincidence? It’s destiny that you met. They’ll create the image of ‘it’s us against the world’ and convince you that they’re all you need to never be alone, unappreciated or unhappy again. They will say phrases like 'We were born to be together’ or 'You’re the only one who understands’ and make you feel like you’re in a romance film.  Mirroring is the way to convince you that they are just like you, your perfect match. They do this by pretending they want the same things as you. All of your opinions will be shared, your desires will be their desires too, however you want to live, that’s now their ideal life too. If you want children, so do they, if you want to live in a cottage, so do they.

These will be repeated until you feel like you finally got something perfect from life, you commit to them and trust them completely. You will become lenient with your boundaries and disregard minor red flags, because hey, you finally found love, or someone like yourself who makes your life better. These are crucial to keep you around for a long time; the illusion of happiness and perfect companionship you always wanted will keep you holding onto them in hope that things could once again, be this perfect for you. You will not want to let go of them even after the love bombing and mirroring is long gone. Love bombing and mirroring are not indicative of how they’re planning to treat you once you’re committed to them; as soon as they feel you are ready to fight for a life with them, roles will change and you will have to endure escalating abuse from this person, endlessly.

Scapegoats and people badly damaged by trauma will often not get the full love bombing or mirroring, narcissists will be able to win our devotion by acts of basic decency, small thoughtfulness and acting tolerant of our trauma symptoms, this will feel like everything to us, and once we decide this is a good, special person who makes us feel safe and we’d do anything for them, they’ll turn and exploit us endlessly.

Only way to spot this on time is: there will be a little voice of suspicion in your head going ’Isn’t this actually a little too perfect to be real? A little too convenient and ideal?’ and you will not want to listen to that voice. You should listen to it. It’s your instinct, trying to tell you something is off. I won’t blame you if you don’t. Most people won’t just walk away from their ideal partner because things seem 'too perfect’. But, get suspicious at least. Alert to red flags.

Enablers and Flying Monkeys

Narcissists can’t abuse if they’re on their own; they will work hard to build a reputation and charm people who they can later use for purposes of enabling, triangulating, controlling, scapegoating and smear campaigns. Enablers, or Flying Monkeys, are people who are either admiring the narcissists, want to be in narcissists good favour, are trauma bond and scared of the narcissists, are emotionally manipulated or simply too cowardly to point out that the narcissists is wrong and cruel. Most people will fall under the influence and want to be on narcissists side because it’s easier, tempting, feels safer, and doesn’t require much thinking. Narcissist will sometimes emotionally manipulate people to go do their dirty work; they will cry about how they miss their runaway children so flying monkeys would harass and judge children for running away, they will invent stories of abuse and insanity of their spouse so people would shame and judge the spouse who the narcissist is abusing. They create environment in which they can keep abusing and other people will jump to defend, justify, victim-blame and further confuse the victim. “They had a hard life”, “They’re your mother/father/uncle, you have to forgive them” or “He’s not that bad” are the phrases you’ll hear from enablers and flying monkeys. The term “Flying Monkey” is taken from the Wizard of Oz, because the Wicked Witch owned an army of brainless flying monkeys who would do her bidding – much how narcissists do with their enablers.

What enablers are doing is absolutely wrong. They should not be ready to defend abuse, or excuse and justify it, or believe and act on smear campaigns, not for any reason. They are hurting and isolating the victim, and regardless of how much they suck up to the narcissist, they will eventually become the targets too. Victims are right to cut out enablers just how they’re right to cut out abusers. You do not have to suffer for their cowardice or stupidity.

Triangulation is a form of abuse where narcissist brings another person into the relationship in order to bypass your boundary. For instance, you refuse to speak to the narcissist, so they send your family members, friends, or their friends, to talk to you about how much you’re hurting the narcissist and how cruel and unfair you’re being. Or, you’re trying to set a boundary in your marriage, and suddenly a friend or a relative comes talking to you about how unreasonable it is to set such awful boundary and to think of your spouse’s feelings and how bad they have it. Narcissist may try to use you for triangulation too, for example, they might tell you 'Go tell your sister she should do xyz and she’s making a mistake, she’ll listen to you’. It’s implied you agree with the narcissist, and that both of you are doing it for the sister’s good, when it’s more likely the narcissist is trying to force this person to do something they’re deeply set against and would only serve the narcissist. Narcissists will use their children to triangulate a marriage, they will often 'gang up’ other family members on their spouse, or one of the children. If you’re the victim, you’ll find yourself cornered, isolated, and in doubt whether you’re doing the right thing, trying to establish a boundary. Narcissists will also often show affection, compassion or even love to a third person simply to make you jealous and worried that something is wrong with you since you don’t get the same treatment. It’s what creates an illusion that the entire world is agreeing with the narcissist and no matter what you do, you look unreasonable for fighting them.

Narcissists will sometimes invent completely boogus scenarios and try to terrify people into doing their bidding and believing they’re right. As if the world will fall if narcissists don’t get what they want.

Society at large will often enable abusers; you can call out abuse and be rendered a 'killjoy’ because people prefer to enjoy cruelty together with the narcissist than to oppose them. Narcissists are capable of rousing a whole gang of people to turn against the victim and to aid in their abuse; this is scapegoating.

Gaslighting is a form of abuse where the abuser attacks your sense of reality. They will usually do this to obscure and deny acts of abuse. “I never said that” “That didn’t happen” “That’s not how I remember it” “You imagined it” or “You’re crazy, I would never do that!” are common gaslighting phrases abusers use for events that absolutely happened, and they absolutely remember. It’s even more powerful if they get other people to agree that you’re insane for remembering a past event of abuse. They can sometimes try to convince you that something didn’t occur while it’s still happening. This renders your intention of calling out abuse impossible; you’re now debating whether the event even happened and your sanity is questioned.

The point of this is to drive you into insanity; prolonged gaslighting will make you doubt your own memories and senses, and you will no longer be secure in your own point of view or version of reality. You will not be able to fight abuse, because you will get stuck on wondering if it’s even real, or if you’re making it up. Narcissist wants not only to abuse you, but to control your perception of it, reaction of it, and to disable you from telling anyone and being taken seriously. Smear campaign and gaslighting ensures that everyone thinks you’re lying to make problems, even you.

You can attempt to block gaslighting with phrases like 'That was not my experience’ 'I know the truth and I am not debating it with you’ ’ Don’t tell me what happened, I was there’ or ridiculing them for thinking it would work, but sometimes abuse will escalate if you refuse to play along, so be very careful with them.

Baiting, Projection and Scapegoating

Baiting is the way narcissist finds out which triggers will work on you. Types of baits are: Scaremongering, Accusations, False Claims, Guilt-tripping, Victim-playing, False Hope, or Intrigue. They will use these to elicit either fear&anxiety, or guilt&responsibility. You are likely to get pulled in and respond emotionally to these, and thus the narcissist will discover which one of these is most triggering and they can use it to either control you, or to affirm that they can still get you riled up, scared, guilty – they feed on being able to provoke these, it makes them feel powerful. They can later use the same trigger to push you into guilt and fear if you try to resist their control. If they continue doing this to you for a long time, you are likely to develop self-doubt and anxiety about your own persona. Way to counter this is to grey rock them.

Projection is a primitive defense-mechanism, where a person feels uncomfortable with their behaviour or thinking, so they accuse someone else of it to deflect the bad feelings from themselves. This can feel the same as baiting, but narcissists do it without realizing they’re giving you the information about what they’re actually feeling and doing. For instance, a narcissist will accuse you of being self-absorbed after they start feeling uncomfortable with how self-absorbed they are, they will start to call you selfish when it comes to their mind how selfish they are. They will accuse you of the exact shit they’ve been doing whether it’s lying, manipulating, faking for attention, cheating, exploiting, lacking compassion, stealing. These claims will feel like they’re coming out of nowhere at first, but eventually you will wonder if you’re really like that, and accept their projection on yourself, believing to really be as bad, or worse than they are. Even though they’ve done 100% of these things, while you have done none of it. This can also be countered by being aware what is going on and grey-rocking them. Deflecting the blame back to them will not work because they’ll either deflect it back, or throw a tantrum and insult you.

Scapegoating is the most vicious abuse narcissist can inflict on their victims and is designed to completely break a person’s spirit while creating power out of terror. Scapegoating doesn’t only serve to terrify and control the victim; it shows everyone what the narcissist is capable of, causing them to go very far to avoid becoming the next scapegoat. This creates enablers, flying monkeys and other benefits for narcissist to enjoy, while the scapegoat is isolated, not believed, and often shunned by the community to show loyalty to the narcissist.

Scapegoat will be blamed for every narcissists flaw, accused of provocation and creating trouble, shamed for their likes and interests, humiliated for their appearance or needs, their work will be rendered worthless and any pain and injury will be treated as if the scapegoat deserved it, or wanted it. Nothing is out of bounds to criticize or belittle in the scapegoat; flying monkeys will do it too, to either affirm themselves with the narcissist, or because they too crave power by stepping on someone defenseless. If a narcissistic parent decides to scapegoat a child, the other parent might stop caring for the child, and agree that the child deserves only to be neglected and shunned. The illusion narcissists create, of entire society agreeing that a person is irredeemable, deserving only of pain and ridicule, has turned people to suicide.

Scapegoat absorbs all of the narcissist’s malice, cruelty, sadism, baiting, projection, guilt and tantrums, so other people in the environment can get some relief and can use the scapegoat as their shield. You can be chosen to be a scapegoat for challenging the narcissist and standing up to them, for refusing to scapegoat someone else, for seeing thru them and showing any potential for undermining their authority, if narcissist is jealous of you, if narcissist feels threatened by your intellect, compassion and emotional depth they lack. And often, you’ll just be chosen because they’re in position of power and you’re unprotected. If you’re their child, a lonely classmate, employee with no high reputation or lots of friends, a minority, different in the way of sexuality or behaviour, anything that is easily used to sway a group of people against you. Narcissists will make sure to spread a smear campaign filled with lies against you, so that nobody would align with you, or believe you if you try to counter their word.

This type of treatment is beyond anything a human being could deserve, and devastating for the victim’s self esteem and sense of reality. After surviving a scapegoating situation, people might not want to find themselves in any social setting anymore. They might start believing themselves to be unlovable and defective. There is usually no way to counter it or fight your way out, unless there’s a higher authority who could side with you, or there’s a way to physically remove yourself from this environment.

Grey Rock, Hoovering and No Contact

Grey rock is a way to counter baiting and projection; narcissists learn and thrive on our emotional responses, it gives them a thrill to be able to send us into rage, terror, disbelief, shock or panic. Grey rocking means you give zero emotional response, and thus prove yourself very boring and a bad source of narcissistic supply. So, regardless of what egregious threat, accusation, claim or insult they make, you just reply with 'mhmm’ and look completely disinterested. You reply with one-word sentences, say 'sure’ or 'yup’ if they accuse you of something or try to fearmonger, answer questions with 'maybe’ or 'I don’t know’, agree with whatever bs they’re pulling out of their ass without caring, refuse to get pulled in or baited, give them no significance in the conversation until they leave. It is very hard to do, because they will up their game and even fly into rage to get a response, if they feel entitled to it. In some cases they might resort to violence. Often, they’ll keep changing the tactics until something works, and if nothing does, they’ll feel dejected and go find another source of supply. If they feel like they can’t get to you, this undermines their imagined power over you.

No contact is the only way to truly win against a narcissist; if they can’t reach you, they can’t manipulate or hurt you. This means no responding to messages, no letting them know where you live, blocking them on every service, and in most situations, even the enablers have to be no contact, because the narcissist is likely to send them into triangulation and use them to get to you. If you’re unable to go no-contact with a narcissist, a lot of people opt for 'low contact’, which means you only hear from them once a year, or once every 6 months, insufficient for them to gain control over you, and you grey-rock them all the way, and never share any personal info that might be used against you. Hoovering is something a narcissist will do to you after you’ve left them. They might leave you alone for a long time, then suddenly send a message saying they miss you, or they’re thinking about you and wishing you could do xyz together. They might also influence another person to tell you 'x misses you, they wish to see you again, they’re doing bad without you’. This is done to remind you of the 'good times’ and an attempt to draw you back in, as you’re supposed to have forgotten all the abuse already and be ready to take them back. It might come as outrageous expectation or denial of everything bad that happened – that’s because it is. All you have to do is grey-rock this, not respond, and enjoy in knowledge that even if you can’t ensure revenge, you can take yourself away from them, and they will never have you back.

Sources: Baiting, Scapegoating, LoveBombing, Gaslighting(video), Projection(video), Triangulation, Mirroring(video),  FlyingMonkeys (video), Hoovering, Grey Rock

[we-all-implode]

What are ur favorite IFs??

On the masterpost u said this IF was supposed to be much scarier, how so??

What changed from the first draft to now?

Have u had the idea to make this IF long ago?

If I'm not wrong, u said something about not thinking of soojin and châu as ROs wayyy back on the blog, what changed?

That 'justice league' thing w amvrosiy, how did he think about ganging up w some people and doing whatever he expects to do(fight evil??)?

Are superpowers common in this world??

Does nayeli and châu have superpowers too?

thanks thanks thanks 🥰

should i @ ppl? i think @fell-star-if & @the-kingshound are my top two

so the first iteration of “we all implode” was set in a castle during the medieval era and the mc was a servant in that castle. it was originally titled “the godkings crown” (heavy is the head that wears it. etc) and yah it was gonna be like. a lot more murdery and scary because the godking is a being that took over the castle and it like…ate ppl w/ like zero discretion i think? dunno…😭

the first draft is technically based off an rp i did in the 9th grade w/ a friend at the time. technically amvrosiy is supposed to be the mc (im sure you all predicted that 🙄) but im pushing him aside lolll. and there were a few more characters i deleted. and there was a “supernatural rights” angle that im still not sure if im going to do anything w. probably not lol.

probably a few years. but just as a regular book.

ehhhhh peer pressure i think? technically the only RO is probably nayeli? like u can fuck amvrosiy but nothing else would come from it. like honestly now that i think abt it ill probably do smthn separate 4 everyone elses romance routes, cuz tbh 🤨 i didnt wanna focus much on romance. but we can still talk abt them like theyre RO’s. 😁

re: the “justice league” thing. this IS the secret society thing i mention in the masterpost. this is a small town. so ppl w/ powers should stick together in amvrosiy’s opinion. i honestly feel like amvrosiy is probably the evil that should be fought (/hj) but yah it’s kinda like. everyone that has powers is in this club. why arent you in this club, kinda peer pressure.

not extremely common. like maybe a quarter of the ppl in this town have powers.

naur unfortunately. châu has a bit of a ghost sensitivity but i dont think it counts.

[the-insomniac-emporium]

Bound Blood (Cassandra Dimitrescu/Reader, Soulmate AU) Pt. 2

Fandom: Resident Evil: Village

Rating: T+ for blood, language, nudity, and horny

Warnings: Implied pain/blood kink

Summary: Local vampire tries to give her human soulmate a bath, but the human is feral and loving it. Then it gets a lil horny, to both of their frustration.

Previous Chapters: 1: Sharing Is (Not) Caring

2: Bloodbath, Baby!

“I take it you changed your mind about the clothes? Or am I supposed to use these towels like a makeshift toga?” You asked, glancing around the bathroom, eying the ornate tub with mild interest. This certainly wasn’t where you had expected Cassandra to take you, especially not when she had somewhat promised you garments to wear. There were no pants or shirts (or even dresses) in sight, just a rack of the softest looking towels you had ever seen. It was admittedly difficult for you to resist the urge to use one to wipe the blood off of your shoulder. However, you figured that it would be best to save that for after you were given a good behavior prize. After all, it was much more fun to be a bastard if your “victim” (not that Cassandra really counted as that) knew how polite you were capable of being, and you were, under normal circumstances, very polite. Most of the time. Maybe.

“What did I say about talking?” Cassandra snapped at you, glaring at you from her perch on the counter. She was sitting on the edge, waiting for something, occasionally eying the room’s entrance.

“You told me to shut up for ‘five minutes’. It’s been eight, at the very least! I’ve been holding back, just for you, babe,” you replied, smirking as you did. For a moment your soulmate seems to consider chucking a bar of soap at your head. Eventually she thinks better of it, opting to roll her eyes at you instead. “For the record, I did count, just to be sure. Wouldn’t have wanted to make any assumptions about the passage of time, considering how fast time seems to fly when I’m with a loved one.” Unfortunately, this does not get a rise out of Cassandra, who has shifted to face away from you. Not yet willing to give up your buffoonery (and assuming that you would not, in fact, be getting a good behavior prize anytime soon), you released a loud, exaggerated sigh, before switching tactics.

Standing up with the blanket still curled around yourself, you maneuver over to the tub, eagerly climbing inside. With how large it was, laying down was fairly easy, though you weren’t entirely flat. Wanting to be as comfortable as possible, you adjust yourself and the blanket until it covers you, while letting one end go behind your head like a pillow. It’s nowhere near as nice as you had hoped. On the plus side, however, is the attention it gets from Cassandra. Before long she’s standing adjacent to the tub, staring down with an expression of exasperation.

“What the fuck are you doing?” She asked.

“Napping, obviously. Care to join me?” You answered, without hesitation. Then you gently pat the blanket, as if offering to let her sit on top of you. This only serves to make her angrier. Now she’s leaning over the basin, bracing one hand against it, her other hand reaching to grab your throat and pull you towards her. The two of you are so close that you can’t help but blush, and the feeling of her skin against yours is weirdly attractive. “I should have known you were the kinky type. Not that I mind,” you murmured, gaze wandering a little farther south than her lips. Before you know it she’s shoved you back down and let go of you. She shakes her hand a bit, like she’s just touched something gross, but you see the pink rising on her cheeks. As much as you want to tease her, the sound of approaching footsteps takes priority. Soon the door is opening, revealing a stressed servant, a pile of clothes in her arms. Suddenly you’re glad that Cassandra pushed you away, considering you don’t think she would have enjoyed having someone walk in on the two of you in that position.

“Lady Cassandra, I have what you requested. Would you like me to draw a bath for you? Or-” she pauses when she sees you, clearly unsure of what to make of your behavior. Hell, she almost drops what she’s carrying, and makes a soft ‘oh’ sound. Presumably dying inside, Cassandra quickly takes the bundle from her. Then she stands between the two of you, blocking line of sight, looking as tense as could be.

“Just get back to work, and don’t mention this to anyone,” she growled, gesturing towards the door. As soon as the maiden closes it behind her, Cassandra is turning back to you. “Get rid of that stupid fucking blanket or I’m forcing you to wear wet socks.” Understandably, you start giggling at her request, hardly able to believe that she had really just said those words out loud. “Would you prefer I cut up the soles of your feet? I’ll heal long before you do, asshole.” Now that makes you pause, trying to figure out whether or not her threat held up. Even though everyone had a basic understanding of how blood bonds worked (the less romantic, and more historic, way to refer to soulmates), the specifics were confusing for most people, including yourself. Would your aching wounds bother her? Or only the initial injury?... Somehow you had a feeling you’d figure out the answer within the next few days.

Until then, you decide to err on the side of caution, for once in your life. Still, you roll your eyes before you pull the blanket up and out of the tub. Again you spot a faint rosy tint on Cassandra’s face, and her gaze most definitely lingers on places other than your eyes. In the end you have to bite your lower lip to stop yourself from calling her out on it. Gotta get some clothes first, you think, then back to being a dick. Holding back only gets harder from there.

Wordlessly, Cassandra takes a seat by the front of the tub, where your feet are propped up on the edge. Giving you a judgemental look, she pushes them aside so she can reach the controls knobs easier. You give an exaggerated pout in response, only for her to ignore you completely, trying very hard to look anywhere but at you. It was in stark contrast to how she had looked at you a mere half an hour earlier. There were several interesting things to note about her behavior, and you found yourself almost excited to figure out the puzzle she presented. Did she care about you now? Simply because of your blood bond? Did she have a genuine soft spot for romance?... Those sorts of questions were all you could think about, even as Cassandra turned the handles, letting cold water splash into the tub.

“I’d say ‘fuck you’ but honestly, were I in your position I would likely do the same,” you said, shivering a little. Cassandra raises an eyebrow, staring at you like you were stupid, before turning the handle a bit more. Eventually you figure out what she meant by it. “What, you guys don’t have a quality water heater? This is Romania for fuck’s sake. I would have figured the water would be a hell of a lot hotter by now,” you added, only for her to splash some still very much cold water on your face. “Is this fun for you? Are you enjoying this? God, I hope you assholes have Legos somewhere in this maniac menagerie, so I can step on them while you sleep.”

“Do you always spit in the face of kindness?” Cassandra asked, moving towards the other end of the tub as she spoke. Once more you laugh, though this time it’s much more of a hollow sound, and your smile doesn’t reach your eyes. “My sister wanted to kill you, but I pulled your pathetic corpse out of the basement, now I’m letting you use my bath, and you’re mocking me. This is why I don’t bother with this shit,” she growled, even as she wets a washcloth and starts dabbing at your wounds. On one hand you understand her frustration… but on the other you couldn’t get the image of her past victims out of your head.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’d rather be clean than not,” you started to say, pausing to think for a moment. Then you reach out, putting your hand over Cassandra’s, making her freeze in place. It’s soft enough of a touch to surprise her. Which is why it’s so easy for you to snatch the towel from her hands. “You ‘don’t bother’ with this ‘shit’ because you’re a fucking sadist, who thinks all humans are beneath you, who acts like she has every right to bleed innocent people dry, who thinks she’s God’s gift to this goddamn hellhole we call Earth. Do you think this makes up for your sins? Do you-” her nails dig into your arm and she grits her teeth in pain- “think that I can forget listening to the screams of your victims? Whose graves is this castle built upon? Whose fucking bones am I standing on? Who died to keep you alive? How many other versions of me have you killed, in other timelines, in other lives, where the universe didn’t demand that we be together? I’ve seen your heart, girl, and it’s as raw as they come.”

There’s a brief second of intense, furious eye contact. Then a flash of movement, a rush of pain, tears filling the corner of your eyes. Blood pours from the new hole in your shoulder, but Cassandra is quick to lick it up. She’s groaning in between each run of her tongue across your skin, clearly feeling it every bit that you were, yet she shows no signs of stopping. If anything, her pain seems to spur her on harder. Even you can’t help but blush a little as you struggle beneath her grip. Why did vampires have to use their mouths? Why couldn’t they get blood transfusions, like the rest of society? This way, your pleasure mixes with your misery, leaving you confused, and the fact that you’re still naked is not at all helping.

“Oh fuck off, please,” you gasped, trying to push her off of you. To your surprise, she does as asked, pulling away after one last lick. When you turn to look at her, you see your blood covering her lips and dripping down her chin. “You’re a mess, Cassie. Hot water?” With that you return her favor from earlier, splashing some of the (finally above room temperature) water in her direction. Most of it misses her. A few drops, however, do manage to hit their mark. Then she’s wiping her face on her sleeve, scowling the whole time. There’s still plenty of blood on her face afterwards, but it’s nothing compared to what’s gathering on your shoulder. She eyes the wound, nostrils flaring briefly, a predator dying for one more bite. “If you bite me again, I swear to whoever that one lady y’all worship is, I will bite you. My teeth aren’t made for that shit, but I don’t care. We’ll both be miserable and that’s it, baby! That’s love! I’m threatening you with an unhealthy perception of affection, dipshit!”

This time you expect her to move away, or hit you, or do anything other than what she does. Calling your bluff, she moves around the ever-filling tub, pausing to turn the water off, before hiking the edges of her dress up and… oh. Oh. Somehow she’s in the tub with you now, legs on either side of your waist, presenting the side of her neck to you with a knowing smirk. But you are not known for your cleverness. Nor your ability to make good decisions, at that. Perhaps your blood loss was starting to affect your cognition. Whatever made you so feral, so beautifully unhinged, you embraced it with utter glee. Soon enough your teeth find themselves on Cassandra’s throat, digging in enough for you to feel your blood bond reacting. For a moment she stiffens in response. Then she relaxes, even takes in a rush of air that sounds oddly content, leaning into your touch. What the fuck? You think, almost shocked enough to let go. Almost.

“What’s the matter, pet? I thought you wanted me to know what it felt like on the other side of things?” Cassandra teased, voice quiet and low. Something about her tone sends a familiar, although unwanted, feeling to your core. Still, her words egg you on, and you find yourself biting harder, tugging at the skin a little. More tears gather in your eyes, but you fight through the pain as best as you can. You drag your teeth across her skin, wishing for sharper canines, before letting go to inspect your work. There’s a clear outline where your mouth had been, but not a single drop of blood. Frustrated, you go back in for seconds, choosing a different spot to target. Again you go through the motions, only for no crimson to stain your lips. This cycle repeats several more times, with you running your tongue along her neck in between bites, so focused that you don’t realize that she’s grinding against you until she stops.

“I need to file my teeth,” you mused, trying to forget about what you had just done. Now that it’s over, Cassandra seems to feel the same, and she quickly climbs back out of the tub. She’s refusing to meet your gaze, instead focusing on arranging the clothes the servant had brought earlier. By the time she’s facing you again her blush is almost entirely gone.

“Finish cleaning up, then bandage yourself and get dressed. I’ll have a maiden wait outside to bring you back to my room. Don’t even think about trying to run,” Cassandra said sternly. You’re too distracted by the thought of what happened to give her any snarky response. So she simply nods to herself, then leaves, slamming the door behind her. Though you had expected to be relieved by her absence, you find yourself groaning, holding your head in your hands. Why is she so attractive? This is probably illegal, you think, in at least several countries. Or it should be, at least. Now that she’s gone, there’s nothing to distract you from the price of her attention, with your shoulder and neck aching horribly. Cleaning up was going to hurt even worse. Still, you think, at least I’ll have some time to think of new insults. With that in mind, you begin to wash away the blood, thoughts entirely consumed by your newest ‘partner’.

[rumblelibrary]

Okay this may sound like an oddly detailed request but can you do a Laszlo x reader where Laszlo has been courting the reader for a while and has never met her father, because her father is dead or abandoned her at a young age or something like that and she never told Laszlo, but Laszlo is instant on meeting him for some reason or something like that?

Sorry if thats a weird request

Unofficial Meeting [Dr Laszlo Kreizler x Fem!Reader]

Word count: 1.8k

Warnings: a bit angsty, mention of old fashioned ideas

Author’s note: I hope you will like it and I respected your wishes <3

"Miss?"

The voice of your chamber maid called you distracting you from answering some correspondence.

"Yes?"

She smiled so widely as a bouquet of white roses and peonies was presented in front of you. She giggled as she was just so happy for you. You have been courted by Dr Laszlo Kreizler for some time now, but he never missed to send you flowers on a Saturday morning, it was his ritual since you two became serious.

"Those are so beautiful, miss"

She said excitedly before leaving you to read the note, she was probably living the romance through you which was quite weird but cute to witness.

You opened the card, Laszlo usually was a brief but intense poet, but this time the message was clear. Can I tempt you with a lunch at Delmonico's?

You frowned lightly before looking out of your window, his dark clothing making him strikingly visible in the greenery of the park in front of your house, he raised his hat for you and smiled.

Damn him and his top level courting.

You put your letters away and got ready spraying some perfume on you before going out, your maid helping you with your coat and hat.

When you stepped out of the front Door Laszlo was waiting in front of your gate.

"You could have called"

He smirked at you "it wouldn't have been a surprise" he concluded simply.

You smirked as it was true and you have also learned to admire the extent of Laszlo'd courtship. He was attentive and respectful, he knew when to trace a line to forbid any kind of bad talks. He was already famous for being a maverick and he didn't want to put that stigma on you too.

You obliged him as you walked your way together to the restaurant, he never failed to ask you about your day and your plans. he was very attentive and you reserved him the same tenderness asking him about his patients or latest articles.

Once you arrived at the restaurant you were brought to one of the best tables, Laszlo taking upon himself the honour to move your chair back behind you and then back toward you for you to sit comfortably.

"Thank you Laszlo"

He smiled proudly taking it as a compliment, but he looked rather stiff and tense for his usual mannerism toward you.

Once you ordered your meal he toyed with his glass of wine a bit attracting inevitably your attention.

"What is wrong?"

He looked at you surprised by your question, but he smiled because you sort of alleviated him from the weight of beginning what he wanted to ask.

"I was just wondering when I will be able to meet your father" he said just as directly as your question was "I met your grandmother and your uncles and aunts, I am missing somebody"

He said it quite easily as your mother had left this earth early for the standard and you regret she won't be able to see what an amazing man you met.

"You don't need to meet him"

He stared at you puzzled, what really concerned him wasn't your refusal, but more the hardness you showed into expressing it.

"I think I do"

You glared at him, your conversation briefly interrupted by the waiters landing the plates in front of the two of you.

He thanked them before looking back at you, your stern look still there.

You had discussions before but never of this size and also as much as he tried before to hint the theme of your father he wasn't acknowledged at all.

He also noticed how the rest of your family followed that same guideline, acting like they found you under a tree.

"I think it is something I have to do sooner or later"

You glared at him again.

"Stop it"

It was hard for him to stop. He was already launched on the theme and he was worse than a wild animal when he got fixated over a theme in particular.

You pushed some common ground theme while you ate. Like John or Sara's agency or other mundane things, but you hated to see the intensity in his look.

That question over and over into his mind.

You never hated to be with him as much as you did now.

You declined the offer of a dessert pretty quickly just wanting to go away.

Laszlo obliged and lead you back outside escorting you to your place.

"I don't mean to be invasive.."

"But you're" you confirmed to him "thank you for the lunch, I can walk myself home on my own”

You left him there moving after your house's gate.

He stood there biting the inside of his cheek nervously.

You didn't contact him any further on that day or the ones that followed, to be honest you avoided him and his flowers and attentions. You even stayed at home instead of attending places you were supposed to be, but where he also might find you.

Until your grandmother called you and you furiously ordered your maid to call the doctor and make him come at your place.

He arrived quicker than you expected. He was worried something happened, maybe you were ill and nobody told him.

When your maid showed him the way to your study and closed the door behind him he tried immediately to politely ask you about your state but your eyes burned holes like bullets in him.

“How dare you?” You growled at him. He stood still in front of you, his back straight even if you didn’t fail to notice the frown on his forehead.

“How dare you to call my grandmother? To ask her something I specifically told you I don’t want to share or talk or even mention? What is s hard about it? What makes you rightful to come bashing into my life asking for answers? “Y/N”

“No, no Y/N, you doctor, should learn to put a line between when you’re an alienist and when you’re a decent human being” you were being extra hard on him, but just earring your grandmother worried voice was enough to make you snap his neck.

He took your rage like a champion, even if he clearly was suffering it.

“Why is so important Laszlo? Why to see your mind at ease? It is just a man, somebody that doesn’t belong to my life, why you have to push it? Why you always have to push it?” “I just hoped..” “Hoped what? Hoped that a man that abandoned a pregnant woman while courting her was worth my time and thoughts? That I need to share my own life with somebody that wasn’t there? That never asked to meet me, or even see the woman he swore to every wind that he loved? That put my mother in the position of being considered a whore? How my grandma had to pretend I was hers to try give my mother a good shot at life?”

All those truths hit Laszlo like a bag of bricks, he was overwhelmed and saddened. Those situations were the ugliest in those times. Women always paying off the debts of the lust of men. The simple promise of a marriage just to gain something that could be tasted forever with a little more of wait. Just the human need to break a rule, just one, that revolutionary feeling that only losers at heart have. Because nobody makes a revolution over the expenses of a loved one.

“I had no idea” he concluded

“I hope you are satisfied now, your scientific mind has now all the puzzle pieces, now leave and let my family alone”

You could see his shoulders fall as you said that to him, his face paling in fear and sadness. He pressed his lips tight against each other, his jaw hurting as he didn’t know if at this point was really worth it to explain why he insisted so much. He ruined it, he tried to treat you with the white gloves and instead he hurt you even more.

“I apologise” he said staring at you, you letting him speak for the first time “I never meant to put you in such a position, I really just meant to be close to your family and I couldn’t see the fault in my own desires”

He admitted it but you didn’t wince, he crossed the line, he went too far and he needed to learn to respect the limits of others, not everyone needed to be under his care.

“I said you may leave”

He looked out of your window searching for words. Your anger was waving down as he looked so upset, and he should be.

“I am also a victim of our society in my own means, even if my behaviour is not excusable in any way, I stupidly fixated on the idea of doing things right with you and some things… Well, they teach us boys some things have to be asked to a father first”

You looked at him with a frown, you shook lightly your head as you didn’t understand his point and you were five seconds away from throwing him the vase with the latest flowers he sent you when you looked at him pul out a little velvet box from his inner pocket.

“The times are modern now, it was silly of me to try move past you like that” he leaned the box on your desk. He nodded at you respectfully leaving. You were left alone with that little box, you stared at it for a moment before moving closer to it.

You looked out of the window as you heard the gates closing and you watched Laszlo’s figure walk away.

Your eyes darted from his back to the box in front of you slowly opening it to find the ring of the dreams of any girl.

Tagged @cazzyimagines @lieutenantn @handmaiden-of-mischief@thesunflowersutra @zemomybeloved @fictionlandslanddreams @charistory @greeneyedblondie44 @apparrio @hb8301 @whatawildone @rhymerhymerhyme  @thehuiabird @lilith-blackrose @unbeatablecurlgirl @obsidianlaszlo @alindeluce @zemosimp05 @baronesszemo-blackwood @nocapesdahling

Let me know if you want to get tagged to my publications too <3

[msjokesgf]

Love Match-Part 1 (Shoto Todoroki x Reader)

Summary: You were hopelessly single. Between working full time and caring for your aging parents, romance was never much of a priority. That is, until your mother suggests seeing a nakodo, a traditional Japanese matchmaker. Curious, you agree, and are matched with none other than Shoto Todoroki, the famous Pro Hero. At first, you think it's a joke, but as you grow closer, you begin to wonder if a marriage between two strangers could really work. 

Were you making a mistake? Or had you found your perfect match?

Word Count: 3,845

Ao3 Link | Masterlist

“Attention passengers, the 310 to Tosche Station has been delayed due to unforeseen circumstances. Thank you for your patience and understanding at this time.”

Sometimes living in a superhuman society could be so inconvenient.

You sighed and reached into your coat pocket to pull out your phone. It was the second time this week a villain had disrupted your morning commute. They were certainly getting bolder. You shot your boss a text letting him know you’d be late and then returned your attention to the array of colorful signs overhanging the platform. Sure enough, your train’s status went from “on time” to “delayed.” Hopefully, there wouldn’t be too much collateral damage. They were still cleaning up the aftermath of the last brawl.

“Ooh, who do you think is fighting?”

You turned. Nearby, a group of students stood in a circle with their phones out. Judging by their uniforms, they were middle schoolers.

“I don’t know,” one of the girls said. “Maybe Uravity? I saw her on tv last week. She’s super cute.”

“Maybe. Or what about Endeavor? Isn’t he the Number One Hero?”

“Nah, not anymore. He’s like, old now. But I think he’s still in the top five, at least.”

“Someday I’ll be a top five Hero!” one of the boys announced loudly. “Just wait ‘til I get accepted to the hero course at U.A. Then I’ll really be able to show how strong my Quirk is.”

“Yeah, sure, Kenishi-kun.”

They all laughed lightheartedly before disappearing into the sea of school uniforms and dark business suits. You smiled to yourself. Your school days were long behind you now, but the memory of applying to high school was still as vivid as ever. The thrum of excitement as everyone listed their top schools, the anticipation of hearing back from admissions, and finally, the relief of making your decision. Most of your classmates planned to go to a normal high school and then either enter the workforce or pursue higher education, as you did. However, those with ambitions of becoming a Pro Hero applied to hero courses at elite schools like U.A. and Shinketsu. The few who managed to get in talked about it for weeks afterward.

Despite having a powerful Quirk, you were never drawn to the Pro Hero profession like so many of your peers had been. Instead, you were perfectly content with leading a quiet, normal life. After graduating high school, you decided to study business at one of the local universities and then moved on to the boring office job you worked at now. There wasn’t much to complain about; the pay was good, the people were nice, and, most importantly, the hours weren’t long. But that’s all it was: a job. Something to keep you busy and help provide for your aging parents, one of whom was chronically ill. It wasn’t something you were particularly passionate about.

Another twenty minutes passed before you heard a whistle in the distance and within a few moments, the train thundered onto the track. You braced yourself for the surge of people exiting onto the already packed platform. The morning commute was always the worst. Too many people crammed into a moving tin can like sardines while you tried to avoid eye contact as much as possible. Thankfully the ride itself wasn’t long and there was only one other stop along the way. As you pushed into the car, you managed to secure yourself a spot by the door and settled in for the ride.

When you finally arrived at your office, a relatively nondescript high rise, you were greeted by the sight of your three closest coworkers gathered around one of their computers. As you approached, you could see they were watching a live stream news broadcast about a group of Pro Heroes fighting a gang of Villains. The Heroes had won, and a reporter was interviewing one of them at the scene.

“Ugh, he’s so handsome,” Megumi sighed. “Even his voice sounds dreamy.”

“He’s super strong too. I can’t believe he almost took down the whole group by himself before his backup came,” Tomoko added, crossing her arms over her chest.

Hikaru tilted her head. “Why does he look like he forgot if he left the oven on?”

“What are you guys watching?” you asked, curious to know which Hero they were fawning over.

All three turned at the sound of your voice and said your name in unison.

“We were worried about you! Morioka-san said you would be late, but he didn’t tell us why. Is everything okay?” Megumi asked.

You nodded. “It was my train. A Villain attack delayed it, so I was stuck at the station. Remember, it happened to me earlier this week too.”

“Oh, it must’ve been the one we were just watching. See?”

Tomoko moved her chair away from the desk so you could see the news report better. The camera had cut back to the battle scene, which was littered with large chunks of ice and some scorch marks. Judging by the craters in the road and sidewalk, it must’ve been quite the fight. You were almost disappointed you missed it.

And then you saw who they’d been talking about.

With his distinct half-and-half appearance, he was easily recognizable, even for someone like you who didn’t pay much attention to Pro Heroes or their rankings. Your coworkers had been admiring Shoto Todoroki, the current Number 3 Hero. That explained why there was so much ice around. If you remembered correctly, his Quirk allowed him to generate ice from his right side and fire from his left. Talk about hitting the genetic lottery. It was like he was bred for Hero work.

“How do you think he got that scar?” Hikaru wondered aloud. She was referring to the prominent burn scar on his left side, which reached from his hairline to the top of his cheek. “Did a Villain give it to him?”

“Hmm, I don’t think so. Not that it matters, because I think it only adds to his good looks.” Megumi nudged your shoulder. “Don’t you agree?”

You took another hard look at the man on the screen before you shrugged and said, “Eh, I guess.”

“So picky.” Tomoko teased. “That matchmaker certainly has his work cut out for him.”

You blushed as the conversation turned to your love life, or lack thereof. Sometimes you really regretted telling your coworkers that little bit of your personal life. They managed to bring it up almost every time they saw you. So nosy.

“Ah, right, how’s that going? Did you hear back from them yet?” Hikaru asked.

“No, not yet,” you replied, “But he said it could take a few weeks and I only submitted my profile last month. I’d rather it take a little longer than be paired with someone I don’t like.”

“You just have to trust the process! My cousin’s friend’s sister’s neighbor met her husband through a matchmaking service, and they just celebrated their tenth anniversary,” Megumi added.

“I know. My parents said the same thing when I started all this. But they could be biased since their marriage was arranged,” you said.

Hikaru yawned. “Well, I wouldn’t stress too much about it. If things don’t work out, you can always get a cat.”

You smiled. “Thanks. I’ll keep that in mind.”

The computer screen grabbed your attention again. Shoto was still with the reporter, who seemed slightly exasperated by his short, vague responses. Guys like him don’t need matchmakers, you thought to yourself. He could walk into any bar or club and have his pick of anyone he wanted. Megumi was right; he was a pretty handsome guy and being rich and famous probably helped too.

You noticed the time at the bottom of the screen and excused yourself from Tomoko’s desk. It was time to get to work. There probably wasn’t much to do today, considering how slow things had been this week, but your train was late, and you wanted to make sure all your assignments were done before the weekend. You’d have to check in with Morioka later about that upcoming presentation he mentioned and see if he needed help organizing any future projects. Not to mention the mountain of emails you had to answer and the possibility of a meeting or two. Just standard, corporate things.

As you settled into your chair and typed out your password, you couldn’t help but wonder if Pro Heroes like Shoto ever had to sit and answer emails.

-

After work, you briefly stopped at the store to pick up a few things for your mother before heading home. She had texted you a small list around lunch time and said she wanted to make dinner that night. You were surprised by her offer, but happily agreed and got the groceries without complaint. If she was cooking, it meant she must’ve had some news to share. Perhaps the matchmaker had been in touch. All the more reason you wanted to get home as soon as possible.

You trudged up the stairs to your family’s apartment, carefully balancing your shopping bag as you dug around in your pocket for the keys. Your fingers and cheeks were numbed by the cold and when you opened the door, the heat that radiated from inside briefly warmed them.

“Kaasan, I’m home,” you called, toeing off your work shoes and switching to your house slippers. “I got the things you wanted.”

“In the kitchen!”

You rounded the corner and saw your father sitting on the couch, watching the news on tv. He waved as you walked past to put the groceries on the kitchen table.

“How was work?” he asked.

“Good. My train was late again, though. Another Villain attack.” You rolled your eyes.

“Yes, I saw on the news earlier. I’m glad you’re okay.”

You started taking the groceries out of the bag when your eyes landed on a plain manila envelope lying on the table. It was addressed to you. Your heart skipped a beat. Could this be…

“We have some news for you.” Your mother appeared next to you and put a steadying hand on your shoulder.

“I knew as soon as you texted about making dinner.” Shakily, you reached for the envelope. “When did this come?”

“Today. The nakodo called earlier and said he found someone who might be a good match for you. That’s his profile. Do you want to look now or wait until after dinner?” she asked.

You glanced over at her. She was giving you a choice, but you could tell by her expression she was dying to know. She and your father probably spent the whole day staring at the damn thing, wondering who the man inside was, what he looked like, what his interests were. This could be your future husband, their future son-in-law. You knew how important this was to them. After all, you were their only child. They had you late in life, following years of heartbreak and infertility. Everything they’d ever done had been in your best interest, and suggesting this matchmaker was no different. You trusted them completely, even if at first you were skeptical.

The tv shut off and your father joined you at the table. All three of you gazed intently at this plain envelope. It had to be done now, just to get it over with. Gingerly, you took it in your hands and began tearing it open. The air was thick with silence as everyone held their breath. Your mother’s grip tightened. You reached inside.

The noise you made was halfway between a gasp and an uncomfortable laugh.

There was no doubt it was him. No one else had such a distinct look. The shaggy hair, half-white, half-red, and intense gaze set in a serious expression could belong only to one person.

Shoto Todoroki.

The name on the profile confirmed it. Todoroki Shoto, age 25, profession: Pro Hero.

“This has to be a mistake,” you blurted out. “It has to be. Why would someone rich and famous like him even need to go to a matchmaker, let alone want to be matched with someone like me?”

“Nonsense!” your mother exclaimed. “He would be lucky to have you. Any man would. Remember, you scoffed at the idea of a matchmaker when we suggested it, but this shows how highly their wisdom and experience are valued. I can hardly wait to meet this young man and his family.”

“Kaasan, I highly doubt that is going to happen—”

She cut you off. “Oh, but it is! In fact, they’ve already requested a meeting. So long as you’re agreeable, we can call the nakodo back to set up a date.”

What? “He wants to meet me?”

“Yes, as soon as possible. The nakodo said his father was particularly insistent,” she replied.

Your mind was racing; it felt like the walls were closing in on you. Her words had barely registered. You could only stare at that picture, completely spellbound. Even his eyes were different colors, one dark gray, the other turquoise blue. You couldn’t deny he was striking. But the intensity of it scared you. When you submitted the profile, you thought you’d have months before anything came of it, and who knows what could’ve happened by then. It was done mostly to appease your parents, but you had to admit you were a little curious as well. Certainly, this scenario never entered your mind.

“So, what do you say?” your father asked gently. “Shall we call him back and set up a meeting?”

You stammered incoherently, still trying to process everything.

“Of course, we’ll set up a meeting,” your mother answered. “There’s no harm in going. If you don’t feel comfortable with him, then we’ll find you someone else.”

Someone else. How could anyone else even come close to his caliber?

“I understand this might seem overwhelming,” your father started. “But believe me, you can trust the nakodo. No one’s going to force you to do anything you don’t want to. The only thing we want is for you to be happy like we are.”

“I know,” you finally breathed out. “It’s just…a lot. And he’s not at all who I was expecting.”

“Maybe that’s for the best. We don’t always make the best decisions when we’re infatuated with someone. That’s why we leave these things up to the matchmaker.” She smiled. “You’ll see.”

Your mother grabbed the grocery bag and headed back into the kitchen. Meanwhile, your father returned to the couch, and you tucked the papers back into the envelope, planning to look them over later in the privacy of your bedroom.

-

“Don’t be nervous.”

That was impossible.

You and your parents were standing outside the matchmaker’s office, a traditional Japanese-style building you’d been to only once before. It was during the initial consultation, where the matchmaker asked you a series of questions about your ideal partner, personal values, and anything else that could help him narrow down his search. The inside was meant to be a calming atmosphere, spacious and open with tatami mat flooring and sliding screen doors. But you were such a mess of nerves, it did little to help relax you.

“Welcome,” the matchmaker said cheerfully, bowing deeply. “Please, come in. The Todoroki family are already here. They’re anxious to meet you.”

You offered a nervous smile that probably looked more like a grimace and followed him into the main room, your parents trailing close behind. What would he be like in person? you wondered. You’d poured over his profile for hours, trying to piece together what you could about his personality. Was he arrogant? Friendly? Maybe even shy? His picture offered little clues. It looked more like a mug shot than a candid headshot, which the nakodo suggested.

You stepped into the room.

There he was.

Your eyes locked, and he was so intense you had to look away almost immediately. Instead, your gaze was drawn to his parents, who stood on either side of him. His mother looked like a kind woman, with an approachable smile and warm gray eyes. Her long white hair was pulled into a low bun. Then, you looked at his father, a massive muscular man with spiky red hair. He seemed familiar but you couldn’t quite place it.

Until he opened his mouth and in a gruff, booming voice said: “Hello, my name is Enji Todoroki, but you may know me by my professional name, Endeavor.”

That’s when it clicked for you. Yes, you vaguely knew Shoto and Endeavor were related, but not this closely. Now he was your potential father-in-law? Even without the flames, he was scary. A long, jagged scar marred the left side of his face, running from his hairline down to his chin and his cold, blue eyes harshly scrutinized you, like he was judging your every breath. As the former Number 1 Hero, you knew he probably had high expectations for his son’s future wife, and you weren’t entirely sure you could meet them.

“Um, good evening, sir,” you managed, bowing low. “It’s nice to meet you.”

You told them your name, which you were sure they already knew, and introduced your parents as well. They bowed and you carefully watched the other family’s expressions, to try and gauge their thoughts. Shoto was particularly hard to read. He came off as very stoic and detached.

Although maybe he was just as nervous as you were.

His mother also bowed. “And I’m Rei Todoroki. We’ve been so looking forward to meeting you and your family.”

Shoto himself was last to speak up. “Hello,” was all he said. His voice was smooth and clear, very pleasant to listen to. You smiled softly. Perhaps you had the wrong impression. Maybe he was shy.

“Wonderful! Now that everyone’s been introduced, why don’t you all have a seat at the table, and we can discuss the process and get to know each other a bit better. I’ve brewed some tea,” the nakodo said.

Everyone did as he asked but before you took your seat, you helped your father lower himself to the floor. As he had gotten older, it became harder for him to sit at low tables like the one the matchmaker had. Your apartment and furniture were Western style since it was easier for your parents to manage. Your mother was slightly better, as her arthritis mostly manifested in her hands and fingers.

“So, did you two have time to look over the profiles I sent?” he asked.

Endeavor spoke first. “Yes, we did,” he said. “So, tell us, nakodo, why did you choose her? She wasn’t what I was expecting.”

The matchmaker wasn’t phased at all by his bluntness. A true professional, you thought. How many overbearing parents had he dealt with over the years? Probably too many to count.

“Well, I look at many different factors, including intangibles, before I make a decision. Please trust my many years of experience as well as my high success rate.”

Your mother bristled beside you. “And what were you expecting?” she asked.

“Kaasan, please—”

“We weren’t sure what to expect. My husband didn’t mean to offend. As a matter of fact, we were so taken by your daughter’s profile that we read over it all night,” Rei interjected.

You couldn’t help but notice the use of the word “we” and wondered if it included Shoto or just his parents. He had yet to speak and was staring intently into his teacup. Did he even want to be here?

“Oh, I understand. Our daughter couldn’t stop staring at your son’s picture. He’s very handsome,” your mother replied.

You blushed heavily. “Kaasan,” you groaned, “You’re so embarrassing.”

“That’s sweet!” The nakodo turned to Shoto. “Todoroki-san, what were your first impressions?”

He finally looked up at you. “Her face was kind, and when I read over her profile, I could tell we shared similar values.” You swore you saw the faintest blush on his cheeks. “I’m looking forward to getting to know you better.”

Your heart fluttered. “Th-thank you, Todoroki-san. That’s very thoughtful of you to say.”

The nakodo brightened, seemingly pleased by this development. You looked down at your tea, but you could feel his eyes lingering from across the table. Did he really want to get to know you or was he just saying that to be polite? Now that he was here, in front of you, you felt drawn to him. Whatever his reasons for being here, he was clearly ready to trust the matchmaker’s judgement.

“So how long does this usually take?” Endeavor interjected. “My wife and I were married within a month.”

A month?! Your head snapped up. The meeting had only just begun, and you’d barely spoken. How could you possibly agree to marry him in such a short timeframe? Todoroki himself looked mortified then shot his father a glare. It looked like he was about to get up and storm off when Rei touched his arm.

“Now, Shoto, we don’t expect that of you,” she said. “Enji, what did I tell you? Things are different now. Young people like to take their time and get to know each other.”

Your mother perked up. “Oh, it sounds like your marriage was similar to ours. We didn’t waste any time, either. My husband proposed only three months after we met.”

“But I knew I wanted to marry her sooner,” your father said.

That sparked a conversation between the parents about your respective families and the tension dissipated. You silently sighed in relief and glanced over at Todoroki. He looked down at his lap, his face completely neutral, any trace of emotion gone.

The nakodo spoke again. “Why don’t we move to a different room? Let the young people have a moment in private.”

They obliged and soon it was just you and him, alone at the table.

He sighed. “I apologize for all that,” he started. “My old man can be a bit insensitive sometimes. He’s not really good with people.”

“It’s fine,” you assured. “My mother is embarrassing too. She just wants what’s best for me, but she doesn’t always express it well. I hope you weren’t offended.”

“No, not at all. I’m actually surprised how well she handled my dad. Most people find him intimidating,” Todoroki said.

You chuckled. “Yeah, I can see that.”

The corner of his mouth quirked up, but he didn’t speak again. You sat together in silence, but it wasn’t awkward. Instead, it was rather comfortable. His eyes were warm, and you couldn’t help smiling. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. The man in front of you was far more approachable than his picture had you believe. You wanted to get to know him, the real him. The one the public knew nothing about.

Finally, he broke the silence. “I meant what I said. I do want to get to know you. Did you want to have dinner with me?”

Your smile widened. “Yes, I’d like that, Todoroki-san.”

-

This is my first time writing for the MHA fandom and I’m really excited to share! Hope you enjoyed it. My inbox is open so if you have any comments or feedback, I’d love to hear it. Even if you just want to chat I’d love to get to know the community.