#and dont get me wrong i love people being excited to watch me go through it its very fun but damn some randos are weird

[burgeaux]

ok now that I'm in elpis I'll probably just post/react and shut off my phone immediately after more than ever to avoid spoilers and allusions and such

[stuniolvs]

keep you safe ~ m.s.

in which matt snaps at you because he is having anxiety before a show.

(please leave requests!)

matt had begged you to go on his second tour with him. you two were a fresh couple during the last one and he absolutely hated it.

he just missed you like hell and didn’t want to do that again. so you agreed to go on this one with him.

it’s currently the second show and you loved going to the first one with him so you were excited about this.

you guys had been driving for most of the day before stopping the tour bus at the hotel then checking in and dropping off all our stuff then driving back to the venue. now just waiting in the tour bus until the triplets needed to go in.

you had noticed that matt seemed a bit off but you just figured it was because he didn’t get good sleep last night.

“hey baby are you excited?” you ask matt who was watching tv. “mhm” he sighs not breaking his gaze from the tv.

you entered the venue with various security guards around you and the triplets.

meanwhile matt was biting his nails feeling extremely stressed and anxious. he felt sweat prick at his hairline. he started doing some deep breathing as he entered his green room type of area to get ready.

you quietly sat on the floor backstage wanting to leave matt and his brothers alone to get ready.

nick entered the room first wearing a purple shirt and some jorts. “looking good nick!” you compliment “thanks babe, i gotta go check with the sound people so ill be back soon” you nod.

then matt enters backstage. he’s wearing a blue tshirt and jeans, simple, yet he still looks so pretty. “hey baby, you look g-“ “shut the fuck up! god you’re being so annoying!” he shouts quickly storming out.

matt felt panic rise in his throat.

shit. shit. shit.

he felt himself start to sweat as he’s breathing restricted. he tried to take deep breaths but they’d just get caught in his throat.

“matt?” you shout down the long hallway knowing something was up with him.

“i-i-i” he tries to yell but it comes out barley a whisper. luckily you heard him in their because it was fairly quit in the hallway cause nobody went down it unless they had to use the restroom.

you quietly open the door and the second you see him your heart tugs. he’s sitting on the ground with tears running down his face, sweating, and trying to breath.

“hey, hey, matty.” you slide down next to him. you pick up his hand and place it on your chest covered with a blue shirt. matt looks up at you with glossy eyes. you take deep breaths as matt try’s to follow “so sorry” he mutters three times through strangled breaths. “matt it’s okay” you cup his face and pull him into a kiss.

he quickly kisses back, putting his shaky hands on your waist.

after a couple minutes you pull back.

you speak before he gets the chance to, “matt what’s wrong?”

“i-i don't know.” he mutters “i-im so sorry baby, i d-dont know what’s wrong. i don't feel good.”

“its okay matty. i love you and if something is wrong, even if you don't know what it is, please tell me and i can help."

he takes a deep breath“i love you more and i promise i will.” he sighs “i have to go, we go on in 10” he groans.

“okay baby, win for me. i love you so much,” you say with an idea popping into your head. he kisses your nose. you run a paper towel under the sink and wipe his face with it. “i love you too baby.”

you walk him over to his brothers and you place a parting kiss on his lips with a “you look so amazing matty.” and a flushed matt enters the stage.

you walk over to you favorite security guard and speak to him. “hey, i have to go get some things for the triplets i should be back about 20 before the show ends, ill text you when im back.” “oh yes of course mrs.sturniolo, ill be there to walk you in when you text me.” he nods “thank you so much!”

you leave and stop by your favorite flower stand and get a bouquet for matt. then you stop by target and get candy and stuffed animals of their animals for each triplet. you leave and arrive back 16 minutes before the show is gonna end, holding a bag full of stuff.

you enter the backstage area seeing the triplets enter from the stage, all three of them sweaty.

matt glances around before landing on you before he jogs over to you “baby! baby! i won!!” he says holding up his medal.

“good job matt! here you go, there’s more stuff in here but they're for your brothers too so can you go get them?” you ask while handing him the flowers you look up at him after your rant and see a shocked matt staring at the flowers. “these are for me?” you nod aggressively. he looks up at you and places a soft kiss on you lips, slightly leaning because there’s a bag and flowers in-between you guys.

he pulls back, “thank you so much baby. i'll go get nick and chris.” he says placing a soft kiss on your nose.

when matt, nick, and chris are in front of you you hand them their candy and stuffed animals.

they all hug you thanking you.

"are we ready to go back to the hotel?” you ask “mhm,” chris says, he looks exhausted.

matt drives them back to the hotel and you all settle down in your rooms.

matt dumps a bottle of water in a cup and uses it to put his flowers in placing his stuffed shark next to you in bed. “to keep you safe.” he said

you smile and open your arms, he lays on your chest. “i love ya’ so much baby” he mutters “i love you matty.” you kiss his head.

[camryntheking]

Ok! My thoughts on 7x05!

First, i just wanna say that the whole Hen and Karen storyline is awesome! I love that the show is giving queer people so much screen time, especially a Black lesbian couple! And i think its super sweet that they really want to try for Mara! I hope it works out!

Next, i think that has been my favorite cold open so far. The “ITS MEEE” gets me every time (i have already watched it loads of times). I dont have much to comment on it other than it was funny as fuck

Ok. The date scene. I was hoping to see more of Eddie watching them (especially after the stills), but oh well. The second-hand embarrassment i got was… a lot. But i dont think its necessarily a bad thing. It showed how out of his comfort zone Buck was and how he was trying to navigate a terrifying situation. And Tommy? I might have to retract my earlier retraction. Cos wtf?? Literally had just finished talking about how its hard to accept yourself in a “macho” field, then makes a dig at Buck when he fumbles? Not cool. Then not communicating what was happening until he was getting in the Uber? You dont just abandon someone at a restaurant like that. I understand the “you’re not ready” thing, but that was a dick move.

Also, Buck, baby. Sweetheart. Darling. “I look at hot guys’ asses.” Sweetie. Like Maddie said. You are more than an ally lmao. I also just love how Maddie showed interest in getting to know who Buck was talking about and treating the convo after like a normal convo. Because it is! And i love it! But she also emphasized talking to Eddie, because she knew that Eddie would not react poorly. I feel like that just shows how everyone knows how close Buck and Eddie are. TLDR, Maddie is an awesome sister and Buck is lucky to have her ❤️

Next point, the scene where Buck and Tommy talk over coffee. I do think that the hand holding at the end is very sweet and shows how Buck is really trying to be more open, but Tommy is just really starting to rub me the wrong way. Pretty much everything he said contradicts what happened in the date scene. I feel like him being at the wedding is really gonna spark some Jealous Eddie, tho, so i am excited to see that lmao

And Eddie and Marisol? I feel like the show is going in a direction that leads them to breaking up. Like yes, it is showing growth for Eddie and allowed him to acknowledge that he has Catholic guilt, but theres just. No chemistry. It feels awkward. I feel like her being an ex-nun is gonna bring up some issues with Buck and Eddie will not stand for that. I also wanted to point out that i got even more vibes that Eddie could be demisexual, cos he didnt straight up say that he loved Shannon, just that he loved being married to her. And he knows that he is moving too fast and needs to step back a bit

Finally, Buck coming out to Eddie. I do find it funny that Eddie seemed more shocked that Tommy wasnt straight than figuring out Buck isnt straight. But its awesome that Eddie showed interest and genuinely wanted to help Buck through the issue. And the hug? Finally! Give me men not being afraid to hug each other! I feel like this is allowing Buck and Eddie to become even closer (i do hope for Buddie eventually)

Overall, i feel like this episode was great for setting up the development of Buck and Eddie’s relationship (whether it ends up being platonic or romantic). And i am all for Buck exploring his sexuality with someone that isnt Eddie. While Tommy isnt my favorite right now, i do think that he is great for the progression of Buck’s story. I do hope to see more of Dad!Bobby in the coming episodes and how Buck’s parents might react to Tommy. I dont wanna wait three weeks for the next episode 😢. Im ready for the chaos of the Madney wedding

If i think of anything else ill add on, but i think thats all i have for now. Feel free to share your thoughts!

[ganondoodle]

I was at first in love with totk, and I still think mechanical wise, its quite impressive

And when I collected all the tears and saw the "story" I genuinely got upset in a good way (at first), because man! Did they really got the balls to go that far? Is there nothing I can do for her? Now I MUST do all the temples, see how it plays out and --oh, I've got this cutscene already. Why are all the people so dumb about Zelda, I KNOW where she is, Link say something-- Link??

After finishing all the temples and almost falling asleep, I stopped playing the game, looked up the last boss and remaining cutscenes and went "Thats it?"

Watching other people (including you) being critically about so many things, both character and mechanical wise, I've almost startled myself with a realization what the gnawing feeling I constantly had, actually was.

Totk feels like a fanfic.

And don't get me wrong, I love fanfiction, I think its great and important, I adore fanfic writers, I love finding gems, I love reading self indulgent stories, see new spins and interpretation of characters. I love the casual, the passion, the creativity!

But totk gives me the same feeling everytime I am reminded that Fifty Shades is a Twillight fanfic.

The world is there. The faces I know and grew to love are there. But everything is ever so slightly different, uncannily so. Just how some characters talk, how they act, how they were placed in the story. The Zonai appearing out of nowhere, but no, they always had been there you see, they were these super magical advanced people but they all died, the king is so tragic. And you see, the king is super cool and powerful and-- oh I dont get to interact with him outside of the tutorial. Did they try to do another King Rhoam-- but wait, that only worked because we didn't knew he was a ghost-- totk wait stop why do you take him out of the story, why couldn't he be a companion, he IS ABLE TO TALK THROUGH THE ARM LET THE OLD GOAT COMMENT ON STUFF?? If you bring up all this ancient stuff and you still got a ghost lingering, let him talk?? (I never ended up getting Mineru but I smell wasted potential as well)

Im not even mad, I am disappointed. It feels like the devs saw what all the lore hunters got attached to and talked about and then just... took the "cool". All the Zonai stuff could've easily been Sheikah tech, but got just reskinned to look more exciting instead of being its own thing.

Like... at this point I prefer what fans are doing over what Totk gave us. The characterization of Rauru (and everything Zonai), projects like you do of what totk couldve been, the little nuggets of actual highlights and details of love fans find in the game. I found much more enjoyment in these concepts than I got from a 70bucks game. And thats depressing.

I love fanfiction. I dont love it when my corporate 70 dollar, six year development, console exclusive game feels like a story that passionate fan couldve written miles better in a week (and I've already seen much cooler and interesting rewrites and ideas).

Zelda has been a huge part of my childhood and its depressing seeing it treated like that. It always was about the story, the epic, its The Legend of Zelda for crying out loud. To be courageous to enter a dungeon, to be wise and solve all the riddles. To become powerful over the journey you embarked on. Zelda to me is the campfire story you tell to others and go into the woods or the beach and imagine what monsters you would slay. Zelda is not the sandcastle you build in the sandbox and then add dinosaurs and star wars ships because you didn't had any other toys, and just stumble into and over some story to entertain yourself until lunch is ready.

I'd have an oracle of seasons over another totk any day at this point. They should've just make the mechanics of totk its own thing, but I guess they were scared it wouldn't sell if it doesn't have a Mario or Zelda skin straped over it.

Anyways, sorry for the mini rant - love your art, love your thoughts and insights, and I am looking forward to see more of it - Zelda related or not (your original characters look amazing, I adore your style sm)

Hope you have a great rest of the day!

*nods along through this entire rant*

idk how many of my rants you have read but yeah ... yeah ... and the further you think about it the further it all falls apart, the wasted potential of it all and the goddamn audacity of them to do those interviews in which they make it EVEN WORSE is just

i know the expectation for a direct sequel to botw was huge and understandbly so but i really REALLY think it would not have been that hard to make it a good follow up even taking into account that totk was originally a DLC, pretty much all of botws aspects could have been developed further, i dont know what could have happened to make totk have turned out like this .. literally it feels like something had to have gone wrong, its like someone who doesnt know zelda nor botw at all was given a few prompts and then just made some generic fantasy story while the rest worked on ultrahand for 5 years

the technical impressive things ARE technical impressive, but i dont think it was necessary nor served the game well in any way (and i LOVE building games- however totk is neither a building game nor a story game nor a zelda game nor an exploration game nor a sequel imo) but zelda, this zelda, is not made for that and i cant help but think it was mainly to encourage people to make some ridiculous mechs so it can go viral on tiktok (not trying to discredit them, it IS cool what they are doing but i .... have my doubts if zelda is the right place for that)

ill stop there bc i have ranted so much about everything i dont wanna repeat it here again; it just doesnt feel like a real game (derogatory), it feels extra bad bc i was not really into zelda when botw came out and while i did get it as soon as i could (months after release since i just started a minijob and didnt have the money) i only over time grew to love zelda this much again, devouring any theories and anything about it bc i loved it so much- i was never into it like this when a new title was announced and dont own any special editions so i bought the totk collectors bc i was just so damn excited for it after the 2019 trailer dropped (god i want that time back ... it looked so much more like it was going to be an actual sequel) even if i was already worried it wouldnt be good at that point given how much i started to sense stuff i dont like about the newer trailers

i recently sold it at our local gameshop bc it was like a thorn in my side given how expensive it was and how dissapointed i was in the game, i genuinely think that, technical impressiveness aside, totk is the onyl zelda i truly cannot stand (for alot of reasons) and im genuinely worried for the future of the franchise

i bought an Oki (Okami) figurine for what i got back and i feel much happier with that :3

(also on a note, i did finish the game two weeks after release but stopped playing it right then and hadnt touched it since, i also streamed all of what i played and its still up if you want to see my slow descend into madness fjkdhkdhjk though its been a long while since then and i by far did not talk about everything back then, just what my most immediate frustrations were while still playing)

(also the gameplay isnt as good as people make it out to be, so much is so frustrating and punishing to use i am kinda baffled it got through like that and most people call that its best aspect ..... though i guess if the rest is so much worse even mid gameplay can seem good ooooooooh how dare i)

also thank you for liking what i do!!! <3 it means alot to know it is appreciated by someone :D

[quijabored]

OKAY SO I JUST FINISHED WATCHING LIKE THE ENTIRETY OF S3 FOR BSD SO UH SPOILERS FOR A LOT OF IT BUT ESPECIALLY THE ENDING CUZ HOOOLYYY SHIIITTTTT

I JUST

I CANT PUT MY THOUGHTS DOWN INTO COHERANT SENTANCES SO LIVE LAUGH BULLETPOINTS ((o(^∇^)o))

OKAY SO AKUTAGAWA AND ATSUSHI???

THEYRE GONNA WORK TOGETHER ARENT THEY I JUST KNOW DAMN WELL DAZAIS GONNA LIKE MAKE IT SO THEYRE COINCIDENTALLY PAIRED UP TO BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF A GUY

ALSO THE PROMISE ATSUSHI HAD AKUTAGAWA MAKE??? FYM AKUTAGAWA CANT KILL PEOPLE HES IN THE *PORT MAFIA.*

Just realizing I don't know how to do the whole colored text or different font thingy BUT ANYWAYS

STILL I LOVE ATSUSHI FOR THAT AND SINCE IT WAS MADE WITH A GOAL IN MIND, I REALLY HOPE I GET TO SEE AKUTAGAWA DEVELOPMENT

AAAAHHHH HES SO SILLY I LOVE AKUTAGAWA HES MY SON

SPEAKING OF SONS

IVAN??? HES SO ME LIKE HE IS SO ME????

ASAGIRI WAS SPYING ON ME WHEN MAKING IVAN FR

Funny thing when I first started getting into the fandom bit for bsd and I saw Fyodor being simped on I was like "eeehh I mean I guess hes cool but I dont really get it. Like sure hes an interesting character but..." AND THEN I SLOWLY STARTED BECOMING A FYODOR SIMP AND I JUST SKDHKSJD I HATE THAT MAN I HATE THAT MAN HES SUCH AN ASSHOLE

please I love him so much hes such a bitch I hate him I love him so much

"If Fyodor told me to cut my skin off I would" FUCKING SAME

ALSO AAAAAA THE ENTIRE TIME LIKE I WAS JUST STIMMING LIKE IM TELLING YOU IT WAS AJSHSKDJSJ

I HAVENT HYPERFIXATED ON A SERIES LIKE THIS SINCE THE PROMISED NEVERLAND (Specifically the manga. Miss you Yuugo)

AAAAAA ALSO THE FACT THAT CHUUYAS JUST STUCK IN POES STORY??

AND POE BEING LIKE "But if Ranpo were to die what would be my reason for living..." LIKE HELLO??? I LOVE MY OTHER SON (Poe)

AND AND AND FYODOR???? AHHHHHH HES SUCH A BITCH I LOVE HIM

THIS MOTHERFUCKER WAS REALLY COMMUNICATING QITH MUSIC??? ALSO THE SURPRISED AND SHOCKED LOOK AT THE END WHEN DAZAI FOUND HIM??

I KNOW WE SEE MORE OF HIM LATE BUT FUCK

ALSO FYODORS ABILITY?? From what I saw it seems that it's just kill by touch but if Dazais like "welp, idk" then I'm guessing it's a bit more complicated than that AND I AM SO EXCITED TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS AAAA

Also Mori and Fukuzawa did the sskk punchy thingy they did in the end of S2!! I'm not sure if people ship them (I refuse to take in any content about Mori) but if people do then win for them :D

Also Im extremely excited to see Nikolai cuz hes me minus the Ukrainian terrorist bit BUT AAAA I HOPE I GET TO SEE HIM SOON

JUST SEARCHED IT UP ITS S4 EP 5 AND AAAAAA

I can't watch BSD until tommorow now cuz I wanna have a minute to process everything BUT AAAA I CANT WAIT TO WATCH S4

Fyodor made me feel so many ways I love him

AAAAAAA OKAY SO MY FAVORITE BOY (Akutagawa) IS ALSO SUPER SILLY THOUGHOUT THIS WHOLE THING LIKE

THE SCENE WHERE ITS LIKE "Are you sure youre the real Akutagawa?"

"Yeah."

"...And youre not gonna try and kill me?"

"Yeah."

"What did you have for breakfast?"

"Yeah."

LIKE I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

Live laugh love Dazai but FUCK MAN AKUTAGAWAS TRAUMATIZED

Like don't get me wrong I love Aku how he is and I'm gonna love him more when I learn more about his character, but god damn it hurts to watch him seem so reliant on Dazais praise and Dazais approval like akdjkajsdj Ive been there my boy :(

ALSO I FEEL SO BAD FOR KUNIKIDA LIKE HE HAD TO GO THROUGH SO MUCH THIS SEASON

I PROBABLY HAVE OTHER THINGS TO SAY BUT AHDKSJDKWBD I LOVE BSD AND I CANT REMEMBER WHAT ELSE I WANTED TO YAP ABOUT BUT AAAAHHH ASAGIRI WHEN I CATCH YOU ASAGIRI- ASAGIRI WHEN I CATCH YOU-

Twas talking about this scene earlier btw :3

AH ALSO WHEN FYODOR GOT SMASHED WITH A WINE BOTTLE??? HELLO??? I LOVE HIM BUT I STARTED LAUGJING AT THE SCENE

[jukey]

Blue Lock x Reader Headcanons

Bllk boys cooking for you!!

(nagi, reo, hiori, ness, isagi, chigiri)

let me knoe if yall want part 2 gang and with who🚨🏈🔥🦅🇺🇲

Nagi x Reader Headcanons

he suggested it at first, which was quite surprising knowing how lazy he is

said he wanted to do 'boyfriend things' for you (he doesn't even cook for himself)

he kept messing up in the kitchen, adding the wrong ingredients, setting the temperature too high

dont blame him, he always bought his own meals, this is new (he cant even tell spinach and mint apart)

you just knew it was going to taste horrible once he set your plate down

to your surprise, it actually tasted good, like really good

he didn't think much of it but felt fuzzy when you complimented him

better salvage the taste while you can 'cause this is the last time he'll be doing this

Reo x Reader Headcanons

oh!

he warned texted you beforehand that he was cooking tonight

reo grew up with all kinds of people working at his mansion so there was no need for him to learn how to cook

once you've accidentally taken some wrong buses to avoid going home it was time to face him (and his creation)

a very happy reo welcomed you and lead you to the dining table

he was wearing one of your aprons and you could've sworn you saw some burned food remnants smudged on it

you smiled in pain wholeheartedly when he brought you your plate (it looked like 4 diseases mixed up)

that quickly changed when he insisted on feeding you

with no way to hide the food or run away, you gave up

first bite in you felt your tongue going through the 5 stages of grief

he was so happy when you told him it tasted amazing (it tasted like battery acid)

(i like to think he sent you this before you went home)

Hiori x Reader Headcanons

he is such a sweetheart

he actually takes you out for dinner almost everyday

you suggested it to him first and he agreed (he got that 'everything to make you happy' mindset)

he saw it more like a challenge than doing something nice for you tho (its the actions that count shhh)

he just went with something simple so it wouldn't get too bad

he lied saying he put no effort into it, that its just something small he whipped up (he counted the amounts of salt grains he needed)

after that day he decided to test his cooking skills more often thanks to your words of praise

Ness x Reader Headcanons

AWW MY DAYS

you dont even need to ask him, he already cooks for you evey single day

and if he's busy that day, he'll make food at ungodly hours and wakes you up to eat

he absolutely LOVES it when you eat his food and then waits patiently for you to say what you think of it

i feel like he gets a burst of excitement when you tell him you love it, this is why he prefers you eat his food instead of anyone elses

he tries finding excuses to make you plenty of food

one time you came home to him celebrating you for being yourself, the person whom he loves<3 (he made a whole feast for you)

he even wants to be the one to bake you your own birthday cake (watch out before its a kaiser themed one)

Isagi x Reader Headcanons

he absolutely adores your cooking so this was quite a bit of a wasted opportunity thing for him

however, he seemed really focused while working on your food

he kept asking you for help and after a while you stopped and he just whined about how unfair that is

bro would ask for 3 hints like this is some kind of quiz

he was very nervous about bringing you your food (he almost wanted to trip on purpose)

the food wasnt that bad but missed a bit of flavour or something to strengthen the taste

ofcourse you didnt tell him that as the good person you are

was happy about you liking his food but wouldn't be open to trying this again

Chigiri x Reader Headcanons

he loved this idea a lot, even wanted to ask you to participate as a competition but eventually decided to go against it

he wants to be able to cook for his partner at all times if needed

he used to chat with his mom a lot while she was busy cooking so he learned a few things from watching her

he took quite some time on presenting the food, made sure it looked very appealing

he would make cute animal faces on it<33

it was so hard for you to take a bite when the food looked so cute, he giggled at this

it tasted great, you didn't get to eat everything because chigiri stole his food back

greedy smh

i want to be one of those justin bieber memes🤕

requests are open!!!

[bubblesxo]

i dont know if you will see this but i am a big fan of your g!bruce meets the batfam!!!! I literally have tumblr just for this series (and now that I’ve tried it im beginning to love it ngl) . Annyywaayy ive just read the new chapter and it’s so good!?? Like i am really excited for the next chapter!!!

Oh and I haven’t watched gotham ( im planning too ) but i sometimes mix the twins????? Like your explanations are good dont get me wrong but yk when your reading and you need to check which ones which? Yeah … and like i want to fix that idk how .do i just like memorize the twins personalitys??

also in this au is theres 2 jokers??????? I saw you once mention Jerome(?) being revived or something

ps .im that great at English sorry .

oh wow wow wow thank you so so much!! i'm really glad that you're enjoying my story so much! it really means a lot to me. <33 i think your english is good! but if you need/want me to clarify anything i say here, just let me know and i'll try to rephrase it for you!

okay, so in the Gotham tv show (this has spoilers for all 5 seasons, so read on if you're okay with that) the way that they approached writing the joker was actually really up in the air in the beginning. this is because they didn't have the rights to use the name "joker," and so fox (the company that made the show) planned on making a bunch of smaller characters in the show as a kind of easter egg as people who could be the joker or who resemble him in some way.

this changed when cameron monaghan (the actor for both jerome and jeremiah) guest starred in s1e16 "the blind fortune teller." in it, the character of jerome is introduced as a 17/18 year old boy who travels with the circus with his mother, who is a snake dancer. he is meant to be one of the aforementioned joker-like characters in the show and wasn't actually supposed to be included again after that episode, if i am not mistaken.

however, the viewers LOVED his performance and jerome came back in season two as a member of the maniax, a group of arkham inmates who were broken out of the asylum. i won't go too into detail about the actual plot, but in seasons two, three, and four, jerome shows up in at least a few different episodes with very memorable storylines each time.

it isn't until season four of the show that jeremiah is even revealed at all! jeremiah and jerome are identical twin brothers, however, jeremiah has been in hiding for years under the fake name "xander wilde" in an attempt to escape jerome, who wants to get revenge on him for lying to their mother about what he (jerome) did when they were children. basically, jeremiah lied to their mother (lila, who jerome is revealed to have killed in 1x16) that jerome tried to kill him, causing jeremiah to be sent away and be adopted by rich people and get to go to a well-funded private school where he could live out his best life as a child prodigy (which was jeremiah's end goal to this), whereas jerome was left behind in the circus that they lived at (haly's circus, the same one that dick grayson later was raised in before being adopted by bruce). during this time, jerome was horrifically abused by his mother, his uncle, and his mother's many romantic partners. this eventually caused him to crack, which creates the character we see in the show.

here's an easy way to remember the difference in their personalities:

in the standard american deck of cards, there are two jokers: one that is black and white and one that is in color. in this analogy, jeremiah is the black and white joker and jerome is the one in color.

this is jerome:

he's got a *very* boisterous personality. he's outgoing and charismatic and, of course, severely messed up in the head. he *enjoys* the pain he causes people and does it with little to no reservations. he thinks things through less thoroughly than jeremiah but jerome always has a plan and is actually quite smart. i couldn't do him the disservice of calling him the dumb twin, despite some points about jeremiah that i'll get back to later.

anyway, jerome has a grand plan for all of gotham: he believes that, fundamentally, everyone in the world is like him and is also at least a bit crazy inside. he wants everyone to tap into their inner selves and let themselves run free / go crazy. he successfully ensnares huge hoards of gothamites with his persuasive way of speaking and interesting flare to his words. he amasses a large cult following, all of whom are very similar to him in the sense that they all demonstrate similar signs of instability.

here's some more gifs of him.

jerome kind of invented the iconic "HAHAHA" signature joker laugh in the gotham universe, even though he isn't the one who goes on to become "mr. j" (gotham's version of the joker) in the end (that's jeremiah, though i have a lot to say about that).

jerome's always smiling, a genuinely creepy smile that throws people off at first but can be really scary once you know what you're looking at. he single handedly turns gotham into a madhouse on multiple occasions and is the one who basically spread the "crazy" to the general population (for short: genpop).

he's a classic cult leader in the sense that he can mesmerize a whole room with his magnetic presence but also will ruthlessly cut down any of his followers if they so much as upset him (or even if they're just being annoying or could have a greater purpose, like when he stabbed a follower in the gut to take their blood to draw a frowney-face on bruce).

that reminds me, another important thing to know about jerome is that he has an iconic stapled-on face! this is because he died once (in season two, though he came back to life for season three onwards) and one of his followers tried to revive him using some insider medical knowledge from doctor hugo strange (who is just... a whole thing. ew.). he thinks that he failed at doing this and steals jerome's face so that he can wear it on television in an attempt to control jerome's followers (spoiler: this doesn't work).

however, it turns out that jerome *was* revived from this, and he's pretty upset that some dude stole his face! so he uses a staple gun to re-attach it after he gets it back (and kills the guy who did it). his face is later punched off by jim gordon but reattached more properly during his time at arkham afterward (the carnival scene happened in season 3 and jerome came back with a kind-of healed face in season 4).

here's some gifs with jerome's messed up face!

jerome is the colorful joker because he's very much expressive. he lets out every single emotion he feels---unless he's trying to deceive someone, at which point he is a phenomenal liar. (in season 1 when we are first introduced to him, he almost successfully gets away with the murder of his own mother.)

jerome is funny and laughs a lot and is *loud.* he's also absolutely insane and incredibly cruel, as well as impulsive, but he's able to curb his instincts if he feels like he can pull off a big plan.

jerome is a showman by nature. he's a product of the circus and it *shows.* everything he does is like an act, something that is acknowledged by many people in the show.

he's a funky lil dude. totally crazy, but kind of adorable at times.

he's also SEVERELY traumatized from his horrible past and has huge trust issues.

so, yeah. jerome is colors! remember that.

unfortunately, pookie died in season 4 and doesn't seem to have been revived this time </3

now, onto his twin brother jeremiah!

jeremiah is, at least at first, presented to be the complete opposite of jerome. he's calm, collected, and seemingly sane---at least at first. bruce trusts him at first and he even befriends him for a period of time before jeremiah betrays him.

jeremiah is a genius engineer, and, when looking into his past, we can assume that he was a child prodigy. he worked with thomas wayne before he died and designed the wayne plaza building under the aforementioned alias "xander wilde." he also locked himself in an underground maze for ~6 years (i believe?) and never went outside, instead sending his proxy (ecco) out to act in his place during business transactions.

as seen here, jeremiah seems to be the complete opposite of showboat jerome:

when we first meet jeremiah, we are told that he is totally sane, but we can later see that this is not the complete truth.

i'll use jeremiah's project as a metaphor for this. jeremiah was building a set of generators which could make energy harvesting and usage much less expensive and much more bio-friendly (if i remember correctly). bruce promised to fund his project and jeremiah accepts his offer quickly.

after jerome dies in season 4 after kidnapping bruce and jeremiah, he left behind a concoction of chemicals that seemingly make jeremiah go insane. this is a play on joker toxin / joker venom from the greater dc universe.

however, after jeremiah reveals his new self

he says that the spray did not actually change who he actually is, but just gave him an altered appearance. there are a lot of fan theories about this, but the general consensus is that the spray likely lowered his inhibitions, which gave him the kick needed to reveal his true self.

even his complexion resembles the joker he corresponds with: black and white. he is the black and white joker because he isn't as expressive, is way more calculated, and is more cruel and less happy. even his skin is paper white.

here's some gifs of what he looks like after those "slight cosmetic changes" :

that looks a lot more like the joker we know and love today, right? bleach-pale skin, red painted lips, green hair. he's instantly recognizable as the stereotypical joker now.

remember when i mentioned the generators? let's go back to them. the entire time that the generators have been around, they've also been perfectly functional as powerful bombs. their ability to be used as bombs does not undermine the fact that they can also be used as generators, and both of these things were true at the same time *for the entire time they have existed.*

it is in this way that jeremiah's paradoxical nature has always existed. jeremiah is crafty, cunning, and absolutely vicious. he has no care or concern for human life in general and will sacrifice most people in his life if it means that he will get what he wants in the end.

this is shown both before and after the joker toxin in how he lied about jerome when they were children (which caused jerome to be heavily abused) and in how jeremiah willingly killed one of his most devoted and beloved followers, who was being ransomed, just because someone put him on hold and it was personally easier for him to just kill him than sit on hold on the phone for a while. (he also has a vicious streak, though, because he immediately moved the demolition of the bombs up to immediately once he was out of the blast zone because those people inconvenienced him.)

something that's important to realize about jeremiah is that he has an issue with being called crazy. jerome does, too, but he eventually comes to accept the term, almost like he's reclaiming it, but jeremiah is *violently* against it. that's one of the things that set him off in the previously mentioned interaction.

both jeremiah and jerome are obsessed with bruce, though in different ways. jeremiah sees bruce first as his best friend and later as the "brother [he] could never have, that jerome could never be." jerome just sees bruce as a particularly entertaining and interesting kid who he enjoyed tormenting who he would eventually kill.

anyway, despite jeremiah being crazy (or, depending on who you ask, just less inhibited) he is still crazy smart and calculating. he thinks through everything before he does it and his master plans seem like they go on forever with 10000 parts to them and backups and contingencies galore.

the only time that jeremiah ever really seems to break out of this is when he's fighting with bruce. while he still does have a greater point to make or something he's trying to accomplish, he thinks through things less with him and shows his impulsive and rash side a bit more, which is interesting because jerome showed his thoughtful and contemplative side when faced with the obstacle that is bruce thomas wayne. i love parallels and contrasts, especially in these two characters! i just love writing about twins, they're always so interesting.

some important things about their relationship to one another:

even though jerome kidnapped jeremiah and seemingly strapped a bomb to his neck (after breaking into his house and telling him that he would kill him), jerome doesn't seem to actually want jeremiah to die. instead, as we later find out, he wants jeremiah to unleash his true self and carry on his legacy of chaos and cruelty in gotham for him after his death. this is why he left behind the laughing gas for him.

(the fact that jerome thought to do all of that shows that he really was a smart character and that he truly did understand the world around him well. he knew exactly what would happen in the event of his death, i.e. bruce offering to fund jeremiah's work and jeremiah accepting, as is shown when jerome has the joker venom in a present box which claims to be sent from wayne enterprises.)

jeremiah *hates* to be compared to jerome in any way, as he thinks of himself as "the face of true sanity." he actually has an entire notebook full of jerome's ideas, which he says he will outdo and perfect, thus defeating his brother in the end, which i don't know if i agree with, but whatever.

i think that it's because of the reputation that jerome got at the circus. jeremiah wanted people to think of him as better than jerome and as the perfect child, which he succeeded at. to him, jerome is synonymous with crazy, which i've already mentioned that he hates to be called.

okay, just one more part to talk about. the infamous, much anticipated Mr. J!!!

in the series finale, it is revealed that jeremiah, after falling into a vat of acid, is horribly disfigured and pretends to be in a vegetative state for the whole ten years that bruce is on his quest to improve himself before becoming batman. he does this as a way of waiting for bruce to come back to gotham so he can continue to be obsessed with him.

however, though this is jeremiah, it seems that he has actually gone through immense mental trauma sometime during this time (perhaps during his fall into a vat of chemicals), which has caused him to sort of lose his sense of self. he once says that there was "another me" [another him] once, which is, of course, referring to jerome. this implies that jeremiah sees jerome as an extension of himself, almost, and almost makes it seem as if mr. j is a whole different entity of his own.

hopefully this clears everything up a bit for you!! let me know if you have any questions or want to know anything specific about the characters and i will be glad to oblige!

thank you once again for being so kind as to leave this ask!! it really made my day. thank you for enjoying my fic, i hope it continues to live up to expectations. i have a lot of fun things planned (and i am very happy that you decided to look into these characters more, because they are actually extremely important to the plot as we get more into the actual story!). <33

[julibeeline]

So this is my first request here and I'm kinda nervous, also english is not my first language, so I'm sorry for any mistake.

So, crew boys realizing they are in love with you, and they don't really not how to deal with that, so they try to avoid you until you ask they if they are angry or something? I'm trying to be specific but I don't really know how to explain it.

Thanks u very much ❤️

crew boys realizing they love you

a/n: i changed I few of them so they don’t get too repetitive, thanks for the request :) enjoy <33

masterlist

DREAM

dream first found out that he loved you when you were staying over for his face reveal stream.

you would reassure him that it would be okay, that it was all worth doing

he noticed the gentle look in your eyes when you made him feel better, forehead kisses when he was struggling to keep his nerves down

on the day of the face reveal, you were touching up his hair as he looked up at you

the focused look on your face as you tried to make this moment special for him made his heart swell with love.

“you nervous?” you ask him, eyes fixed on his hair.

“clay?” you say, being met with his silence

“i-im w-what? sorry?” he stammers, embarrassed.

“dont worry, im sure it’ll go just fine” you smile, rubbing his shoulder up and down.

as the stream started, you held his hand under the table; just out of frame.

no matter how important his face reveal was, the only think he could think about was you.

he was nervous, nervous about being in love with you though, not anything else

this was his big moment; why now?

as the stream came to an end, he quickly rushed to his room leaving you confused and worried.

“i think im in love with y/n.” he tells sapnap, watching his eyes go wide.

“y/n? like our y/n? the one whos in this house right now y/n?” sapnap says.

“yes that y/n, oh my god this is not good” dream whispers, running his hands through his hair in a panic.

“chill out dude its gonna be fine” sapnap says, standing up from his bed.

as the next few days past, dream used everything in him to avoid you.

he would give you short replies, and that is if they were extrememly necessary.

a quick “thank you” when you would hand him coffee, or a “goodnight” after being silent the whole day.

and by the 3rd day, you got so annoyed that you just had to let it all out.

“clay can you sit down for a second?” “sorry, i have to go d-“ “sit down, clay.”

he sat down nervously, faultering under your gaze

“why have you been ignoring me? like out of the blue you just- you just decide you hate me? is this because of the face reveal stream? what did i do wrong-” “you didnt do anything wrong, y/n. im in love with you.”

“what?” “can i kiss you?”

SAPNAP

sapnap first found out that he was in love with you the day karl started talking to you.

he couldnt help but clench his jaw, force his eyes away when you wrapped your arms around karl’s neck, giving him a tight hug

and the whole day he would subconsiously keep his hands on you

holding your waist when walking, shoulders when sitting, hands when you were talking to karl

“oh my god could you please let me go for one second i need to go to the bathroom” you finally say, fustrated

“what? oh sorry” he immediately pulled his hands away, for fucks sake, he wasnt even aware he was pulling at you everytime you took a step away from him

when you came back from the bathroom, his hands unknowingly reached out to hold you again, wrapping tightly around your shoulder

“whats up with you today? why’re you acting like this?” you ask, furrowing your eyebrows

“nothings wrong, y/n. just making sure i dont loose you, theres a lot of people here…includng karl” he mumbled the last part so quietly that you almost couldnt catch it

“karl?” you question, looking up at him

“what? no i didnt say anything.” sapnap replies, pulling you into another side of the room

“why arent you letting me talk to karl? you knew how i excited i was to meet him for the first time”

“jesus y/n, im not. im just making sure that youre safe, youve never even been to his place before.”

“i dont need you dragging me around like a puppy, i can handle myself. i just want to enjoy my time with karl”

“okay then fine! just leave me for karl.” he throws his hands up in the air, letting go of yours.

you turned to leave the room in irritation, letting out a sigh. why was he being so dramatic about this?

“i love you.” you hear from behind.

GEORGE

george first found out that he loved you when you had your first sleepover with him

from the moment you arrived at his house until when you fell asleep in his bed, he was getting used to a feeling that he had never felt for you before

at first he thought that it was the nerves, he had never spent the night with you and obviously he was bound to feel some kind of worry

but as time went by, he caught himself staring at you when you werent looking

like for example, he looked at the way your eyes would widen for a second when you found the lego piece you were looking for, or how the corners of your lips would curl up when you heard dream screaming something so loud through george’s headphones that you could hear him without them.

when he realized why he was feeling this way, he felt scared. there were so many things that came with being in love.

rejection, commitment, love, itself. like who even invited them!

you noticed how he had gotten quiet over the past few hours, not saying a word to you as a movie played in the background

“you all good george?” you ask, worried.

“yeah yeah im good.” he replies, not even looking towards your direction.

“you sure?”

“yes y/n, stop pushing it.” he spits out, coming out harsher than he intended

his gaze faultered as your face fell, looking down at your hands in embarrassment.

the awkward silence continued for a while, maybe too long even.

he would steal glances your way every once in a while, or reach his hands out for yours before retracting them the second after.

by the time george had thought of what to say, you’d fallen asleep next to him

his eyes softened as he looked over at you

grabbing a blanket, he gently placed it on you, making sure to cover your body

“i love you, y/n. hell, im in love with you.”

KARL

karl found out that he was in love with you when he first saw you.

you were working at a candle store, an apron on, welcoming customers that stopped by

as he saw your smile through the glass window, his feet dragged him into the store

you showed him around, laughing at his jokes that he himself knew were terrible.

he asked questions about each candle, only to spend more time with you

and as he said goodbye with 5 candles in hand, you gave him a wave off like every other customer

from that day on he frequently stopped by, checking if you were around.

and when you werent there in all of the times that he went, he grew fustrated

he probably meant nothing to you, just another customer that wanted to smell the candles that youve already shown 20 times today.

as he got impatient as the days passed, but he gave it one last try

and oh my god you were there!

his eyes lit up the moment he saw you from across the street, dusting some stupid shelf with the stupid smile of yours.

he walked in the store, going straight to you

“remember me?” he asked in a hurry.

“of course karl, how could i forget?” you welcome, giving him a warm side hug

“can i have your number? ive lost you too many times already”

and now you guys are dating, the “i love you’s” have been passed back and forth far too many times to count.

QUACKITY

quackity first found out that he was in love with you the day he saw you translating his spanish streams.

his eyes formed hearts as he snuck up behind you, looking at all the sentences you’d translated already

“what’re you doin?” he asks, giving you a kiss on the head

“jus’ translating your stream. i wanna know what youre saying” you reply, smiling to yourself

and as if he couldnt fall more, this made his heart beat out of his chest

“i can just tell you, you know?” he giggles.

“i prefer to to it myself, makes me feel proud” you answer, not looking up at him once.

he turned around for a second, looking up at the ceiling, scrunching his face up in adoration 

“god y/n i love you” he slips out.

“what?” you turn around wide eyed, looking up at him in surprise.

“oh shit-”

“i love you too.”

[spookberry]

thoughts on that Wednesday Addams show

-the writing is incredibly juvenile in a way only an adult man who is not actually nor ever has been an "outcast" could accomplish

-that being said all the actors were really amazing! Especially Jenna Ortega!!!

-One thing I liked but felt was more by accident than by design was the way that this school of "outcasts" were like, really normal?? Like theyre just teenagers who happen to not be human. Which makes the fact that Wednesday is a human who's Not Normal kind of compelling. Wish this was an intentional idea though, it could've been played with a whole lot more.... also i just kinda wish they'd picked a word other than "outcasts" to call them. like oh my god i could absolutely see some line during the climax where theres all this petty teen drama where someones like "i might not be human, but at least im not a Monster like you Wednesday" woulda been AWESOME

-Wednesday's love triangle was lame and if she had to get with a guy I'd've preferred Eugene. I love his sibling relationship with wednesday sooo much. One of my favorite dynamics. However if she HAD to get with a guy. Id pick him. He reminds me of Joel from Addams Family Values.

-the fact that two guys fell wildly in love with Wednesday without her doing absolutely anything and also very clearly not returning the sentiment whatsoever and instead just using them whenever she needs them was really funny and on brand, wished the show had been self aware about it

-I really wish the other female characters played bigger roles? Like Enid was Great and I loved the glimpses of her friendship with Wednesday and Thing and their HUG omg,,, I wish the romance plots had been axed in favor of giving Wednesday's friendships more time to shine.

-I also wish Enid and Wednesday had danced together at the Rave'N. Enid goes and dances with all her friends but she never goes over to have fun with Wednesday :( it just felt wrong like, narratively, we saw how excited Enid was about Wednesday going to the dance and then the camera seems to cut to show Enid get excited from watching Wednesday dance and then they dont even Talk?? I hated that.

-also, Bianca. I really loved the way she was basically friends with Wednesday by the end of the show. Wish the show had done a better job at the Enemies to Friendly Rivals to Friends dynamic. Bianca in general is a REALLY cool character that I want more time with.

-Both Enid and Bianca would've made better love interests than the guys imo

-I did like the mysteries, though I'm not sure how well it actually works with the Addams. Because they wound up adding this plot line, no spoilers, about Gomez being accused of murder and Morticia gets super touchy about it. But like?? theyre the ADDAMS why would they be behaving like this about a death???? Makes no sense to me. Needed to be reworked, cuz there definitely are Ways to have made it work imo.

-I really loved all of the costuming for Wednesday though the color correction done on the uniforms makes me kinda sad. i think it would've been fun if the school had been more vibrant and full of life to better contrast who Wednesday is and how she stands out.

-Wednesday's relationship with Morticia is really weird, but in general I get the feeling that certain people involved didn't actually know what Morticia's character was like... at all? And a lot of the problems with the family dynamics stems from this mischaracterization of Morticia in particular. I know some people didn't like Wednesday going through a rebellious phase, but I actually think that fit her character just fine, it's how her parents react to this rebellion that feels out of character to me.

-the fact that they had a romance arc about a werewolf who struggled to be a werewolf and an awkward gorgon..... Very Monster High 2022 to me ngl

-Wednesday is Autistic and you can't convince me otherwise. Everything from the way all of her social interactions are written to the way she literally diverts eye contact whenever theres a closeup shot while she talks to people. shes just like me fr.

overall i give it a 6 out of 10. I wouldn't go around recommending it to people, it's kinda bad, but I got some enjoyment out of it,, so not fully the worst.

But Also if you haven't seen it I WOULD recommend you go watch the fanmade Adult Wednesday Addams series on youtube. It's a classic!

[bat-eclecticwolfbouquet-love]

It's really kinda bittersweet that what I always wanted to happen for Shigaraki is happening. Izuku is seeing what he went through and is trying to save him, I wished for this so much. But this arc has been soooooo loooonnng and I've watched Tomura go through so much, I've stressed and worried enough for 50 people over his character for years. Now that it's finally happening I've got a new favorite and feel sad for not being excited and happy. Dont get me wrong I still love Shigaraki he's just not my hyper fixation.

[emometalhead]

Tag 3 people who have made your year better and send this to the last 10 blogs in your notifications (anonymously or not) ❣

I can't simply tag 3. So many people made this year wonderful for me, and I want to acknowledge them all!!

In alphabetical order by url:

@a-queen-of-the-clouds - Jori, you are always a joy to have on my dash. I have so much fun reading your tags. Never change!! I love you, and am grateful to know you.

@arnold-layne - My beloved!! We've been friends for a while, but I feel like our communication has really ramped up this year. I'm so glad that we've been talking more! You're a really cool person, and I love our interactions. Ilysm.

@awrestlinggirlwholoves80sbands - Alessia!! Sweetie, you are one of the kindest people I've ever met. I love your fashion, your passion for your interests, and how much you care about your friends. I am so so grateful for our continuing friendship. ILY!!

@born-to-lose - Mel, my beloved, my wife!! You know I'm obsessed with you. You are the language queen, a talented writer, and stunningly hot. Iconic all around. I love you and our friendship. Here's to another year! Kisses!!

@day-trippin-dreamer - TINA!!!!!! Our daily conversations have helped me stay sane through this crazy year. Even though timezones are not our friends, I love that we manage to stay updated on each other's days. We will meet up in Belgium to watch movies together one day. My passport should arrive in early February lol. One step closer!! I love you so much, and I adore our friendship. Thank you for everything!!

@deadhousep1ants Bee!! Hiiii! I am so glad to have met you this year! We talk more on Instagram than here nowadays, but I needed to include you on this post!! We have a lot in common, and I just generally think you're really cool. I'm really happy to be your mutual. I'm always wishing you the best! Ily.

@doctorqueensanatomy - Sheamus, I don't think I need to tell you how much I appreciate, because I say it all the time. However, I'm still going to tell you again. I love you!!!! Our friendship is precious to me, and I am so sad I can't hug you. I am still sitting, waiting, and constantly checking my email for when you'll receive any of the things I sent you for Christmas lol. I'm grateful for the opportunity to physically show how much I care, and I look forward to all of our future conversations (in text and call). Btw you're also like a super talented writer, and that needs to be acknowledged.

@duffmckagans - Kelsey, you're like a piece of my soul put into another person. We are so similar, and it's crazy how well we get along. I love our daily catch ups, and that I can text you about literally anything. There is no one else I'd rather sob to about Axl. I can always count on you. You're an insanely talented writer, so smart in general, and always have the correct opinion. You know I love you.

@emodennis - Phoenix, my dude, I am so happy we've become friends this year!! Last year, I wouldn't have imaged myself on Sunnyblr (as I literally didn't know it existed). I am so glad to be there, because otherwise we wouldn't have met. I'm excited to see how our friendship progresses in the coming year!!

@glamourizedcocaine - Alexi, you haven't been active lately. I'm not sure you'll see this, but it feels wrong to exclude you from this post. I love being able to scream nonsense about Gerard with you. You're a good friend, and I miss you on my dash. Ily.

@hobbitinneverland - İrem!! You're such a positive force on my dash and in my notes. I love you so much!! You always brighten my day with your presence. You're so amazing. Sending you the best vibes!!

@i-dont-like-rice - My dear Andi, idk if you'll see this, but I will take any opportunity to say how wonderful you are. I love your chaos. I love that I can talk to you about anything, and you'll understand. I feel like you see parts of me that no one else can, and I hope you know that your friendship is irreplaceable. I love and miss you! I look forward to our meeting in Belgium one day!!

@idontwanttospoiltheparty - Hi Fiona!! Your blog is so fun. It's the best hub for Beatles and Swiftie discussions. I love being able to see takes without absurd drama. I may not always agree with your opinions, but I have a lot of respect for you. You're really smart, talented, and all around fun. I'm grateful for our friendship. Ilysm.

@inquisitiveheretic - Lee!!!!!!! I think I'm incapable of thinking your name without screaming it mentally. You are my favorite mysterious mutual. I am always so excited to talk to you, and I feel so happy when I see you in my notifications. I think you're my biggest example of an opposites attract friend due to our wide divergence of interests, and that's really cool to me. You are someone that I take great comfort in, and I wish I could hug you. I think of you whenever I listen to Metallica, and that happens a lot. Love you.

@losers-yurio - Rylie, you aren't very active here, but I hope you know I still love you with my entire heart despite having less communication this year. I'm on better terms with my parents in regards to calling people, and I'm hoping to have more free time soon. We really really need to reconnect. I love and miss you so much. You will always be my first real Internet friend, and one of my favorite people ever.

@modernloverss - Syd!! First of all, I hope you know you can ramble to me about Ghost anytime, and I'll be very excited about it. It's been fun watching you fall down the fandom rabbit hole. All of our interactions have been so overwhelmingly positive. Your presence always warms my heart, and that is just about the highest praise I can bestow. Ilysm.

@nocturnal-light - Lynne, I am forever in awe of you. You're a creative artist, a stunning ice skater, and an impressive bassist. You can do it all omg. I'm proud of you for all you've accomplished, and I'm rooting for you from the virtual sidelines. Also, in case no one has told you lately, you're doing great with school. You will make it through!! I love being mutuals and friends. Ily!!

@no-fxn-club - Frankie, my dude, the iconic southern who confuses me constantly, you are one of my best friends. I will never be able to tell you I love you enough times. I am SO SAD I can't hug you!!!! I know you give amazing hugs. You have a big heart, and I'm grateful to be your friend to receive some of that love. You have an A+ music taste, a killer sense of fashion, and I always have so much fun talking to you about the most random stuff. I LOVE YOU!!

@nuttmeg13 - Megan, you were my first mutual! Though not directly, you did help me figure out how this place works lol. I'm grateful for you, because I really love Tumblr now that I've found community. You have The Best opinions. I have absorbed so much random Doctor Who information over the years, and I love seeing your fandoms that I know nothing about! You're one of my favorite Swifites!! Ilysm!

@ob-la-di-ob-la-di - Ameera, you are always a source of positivity. You are a talented artist, and I hold it so near and dear to my heart that you drew me!! I think about that all the time, because it was so sweet!! Every interaction we have brings me so much joy. You're gorgeous inside and out. I love you!

@only-a-heartbeat-away - Harlow!! I appreciate you so much. I can always count on you for participation in ask and tag games. It's been lovely getting to know you through games. You have an excellent music taste, and you're such a fun person. Ily! Thanks for being my friend!

@ramblinguitar - Hi Alexa!! First and foremost, thank you for all of the music recommendations this year. I think I've added every song to my main playlist. You have great taste, and a good understanding of what I enjoy. That's really cool. I'm thankful to have such an awesome, grunge mutual and friend. You're talented, and I wish I wasn't broke so I could actually buy bracelets from you. I love your work!! Ily, my dear friend!!

@smokeandmirrorz - Jeordie!! You're so damn cool. First of all, I'm so excited to receive your card this year. Your art is stunning!! I love your style, and it means so much that you were willing to make something for me again. You're so nice!! You have impeccable style, great taste in pop culture, and I love our conversations. One of these days I really hope I'm free when you do a movie stream or just a voice chat. Ily and our friendship!

@therockywhorerpictureshow - Ella, you are an incredible baker! I love seeing posts of what you have created. Your posts always make me hungry lol. A+! Also, your dogs are so cute. Such a pleasure to see!! I love seeing you in my notifications and on my dash. I'm so glad we're mutuals. Ily!

@tomkeifer - Ren, you're one of my favorite people and I hope you never forget that. You're easily one of the coolest people I know. You're incredibly smart, and I know you are going to accomplish great things in life. I am so excited to see that happen. You're a talented musician, have amazing hair/makeup skills/fashion, and are overall a good person. I'm forever impressed with you. Please drink some water. I love you!!

@th0mas-jerome-newton - Zoran, my Polish mutual, my whole heart. Ilysm!! You are such a fun presence on my dash. We don't talk very much, but you bring me such comfort. I'm grateful for you!!

@xx-key-xx - What can I say? You're an icon. I love your commitment to the 2000s. You are my favorite 2000s girlie, and I love your posts so much. Not to sound like I'm signing a yearbook, but stay cool ILY!!

[stuniolvs]

⋆｡˚୨୧˚｡⋆ 𝐊𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐒𝐀𝐅𝐄 ~ matthew sturniolo

summary.) matt snaps at you because he’s having anxiety before a show.

warnings.) anxiety, panic attacks

matt had begged you to go on his second tour with him. you two were a fresh couple during the last one and he absolutely hated it.

he just missed you like hell and didn’t want to do that again. so you agreed to go on this one with him.

it’s currently the second show and you loved going to the first one with him so you were excited about this.

you guys had been driving for most of the day before stopping the tour bus at the hotel then checking in and dropping off all our stuff then driving back to the venue. now just waiting in the tour bus until the triplets needed to go in.

you had noticed that matt seemed a bit off but you just figured it was because he didn’t get good sleep last night.

“hey baby are you excited?” you ask matt who was watching tv. “mhm” he sighs not breaking his gaze from the tv.

you entered the venue with various security guards around you and the triplets.

meanwhile matt was biting his nails feeling extremely stressed and anxious. he felt sweat prick at his hairline. he started doing some deep breathing as he entered his green room type of area to get ready.

you quietly sat on the floor backstage wanting to leave matt and his brothers alone to get ready.

nick entered the room first wearing a purple shirt and some jorts. “looking good nick!” you compliment “thanks babe, i gotta go check with the sound people so ill be back soon” you nod.

then matt enters backstage. he’s wearing a blue tshirt and jeans, simple, yet he still looks so pretty. “hey baby, you look g-“ “shut the fuck up! god you’re being so annoying! leave me alone!” he shouts quickly storming out.

matt felt panic rise in his throat.

shit. shit. shit.

he felt himself start to sweat as he’s breathing restricted. he tried to take deep breaths but they’d just get caught in his throat.

“matt?” you shout down the long hallway knowing something was up with him.

“i-i-i” he tries to yell but it comes out barley a whisper. luckily you heard him in their because it was fairly quit in the hallway cause nobody went down it unless they had to use the restroom.

you quietly open the door and the second you see him your heart tugs. he’s sitting on the ground with tears running down his face, sweating, and trying to breath.

“hey, hey, matty.” you slide down next to him. you pick up his hand and place it on your chest covered with a blue shirt. matt looks up at you with glossy eyes. you take deep breaths as matt try’s to follow “so sorry” he mutters three times through strangled breaths. “matt it’s okay” you cup his face and pull him into a kiss.

he quickly kisses back, putting his shaky hands on your waist.

after a couple minutes you pull back.

you speak before he gets the chance to, “matt what’s wrong?”

“i-i don't know.” he mutters “i-im so sorry baby, i d-dont know what’s wrong. i don't feel good.”

“its okay matty. i love you and if something is wrong, even if you don't know what it is, please tell me and i can help."

he takes a deep breath“i love you more and i promise i will.” he sighs “i have to go, we go on in 10” he groans.

“okay baby, win for me. i love you so much,” you say with an idea popping into your head. he kisses your nose. you run a paper towel under the sink and wipe his face with it. “i love you too baby.”

you walk him over to his brothers and you place a parting kiss on his lips with a “you look so amazing matty.” and a flushed matt enters the stage.

you walk over to you favorite security guard and speak to him. “hey, i have to go get some things for the triplets i should be back about 20 before the show ends, ill text you when im back.” you smile at him “oh yes of course mrs.sturniolo, ill be there to walk you in when you text me.” he nods “thank you so much!”

you leave and stop by your favorite flower stand and get a bouquet for matt. then you stop by target and get candy and stuffed animals of their animals for each triplet. you leave and arrive back 16 minutes before the show is gonna end, holding a bag full of stuff.

you enter the backstage area seeing the triplets enter from the stage, all three of them sweaty.

matt glances around before landing on you before he jogs over to you “baby! baby! i won!!” he says holding up his medal.

“good job matt! here you go, there’s more stuff in here but they're for your brothers too so can you go get them?” you ask while handing him the flowers you look up at him after your rant and see a shocked matt staring at the flowers. “these are for me?” you nod aggressively. he looks up at you and places a soft kiss on you lips, slightly leaning because there’s a bag and flowers in-between you guys.

he pulls back, “thank you so much baby. i'll go get nick and chris.” he says placing a soft kiss on your nose.

when matt, nick, and chris are in front of you you hand them their candy and stuffed animals.

they all hug you thanking you.

"are we ready to go back to the hotel?” you ask “mhm,” chris says, he looks exhausted.

matt drives them back to the hotel and you all settle down in your rooms.

matt dumps a bottle of water in a cup and uses it to put his flowers in placing his stuffed shark next to you in bed. “to keep you safe.” he said

you smile and open your arms, he lays on your chest. “i love ya’ so much baby” he mutters “i love you matty.” you kiss his head.

[triplexdoublex]

I also think music has saved Colson or helped him a lot, not only the music but the fans. He was living in a world where he felt like he didn’t belong so he created his own family where he 100% will always belong. Like imagine him without the fans support, it’s not only the fame he got from it but also how the fans showing constant support and love to him, how a lot of EST sees and treats him like a family member rather then just another celeb. Even to this day he gets so much hate and so many people disliking him for simply breathing imagine where he would be if his fan base wasint this supportive or if he went online and didn’t automatically see so much love from them. He has said there are times when the fans are the only thing that keeps him going obviously his daughter to but he said to have this many people truly believe in him and love him it means so much to him it’s why he’s so close to EST. It’s why when any allegations come to the public or any drama come out and his name is being dragged it’s so important for him to see he has his fans support, they are really wat keeps him going. Most celebs when they get accuse of stuff especially to the degree that Colson was they usually take a break but he was still doing shows and performances. Like multiple people in his inner circle are always saying how he’s constantly watching fan pages, he’s constantly going online seeing wat the fan base is saying. He’s constantly seeking validation from fans bc he replaced his family with them. There are even EST members who say they are more close to est then they are to thier own blood family and how estfest was just like a huge family reunion. I dont think we can fully save him especially if he doesn’t want to be saved. He’s proven that with the suicide attempts but I think they give him hope, it’s why it’s sooooo important that when he’s feeling that down he can go to his fan base online and see the love and support from everyone and see that not everyone hates him like he thinks. It’s not about “fixing” someone but more about giving them a reason to keep going, showing them that people care about them. Even with other est members it gives them a reason to look forward to talk to someone even if it’s just about music or looking forward to seeing other fans at shows. It gets them excited to live another day. It’s just right now Colson seems like he’s in a really tough place where he wishes that the people outside of his family would show love to him too, he’s trying to seek validation from the public and that’s where his self esteem issues come to play. Like my family loves and supports me and thinks I’m awesome so why doesn’t people outside of my family think that too. It’s like watching ur cousin go down the wrong path and watch as the world tears them down and all u can do is show them love and support and hope and talk about the good times and hope it’s enough to get them through it

Yes music it’s almost like its own form of therapy in a way and lots of artists find it very cathartic to put there pain down on paper, turn it into a beautiful song and release it out into the world. Even Jaden has expressed this in his music “you saved my life before but the music saved my soul”

[mrbabygirl]

XieFan Fluff For My Sweeties

Wujiu is a very openly chaotic person but he and Bi’an are both flip on a dime type of people or one extreme or the other but for the most part they’re both very chill Wujiu just has the tendency to be a little shit more often and whenever Wujiu is unaccounted for there’s always a bit of worry in Bi’ans soul, even when he knows where he’s going if he acts a little too cocky he knows something is brewing in that head of his. Of course he has faith in Wujiu he’s very down to earth most of the time and level headed for the most part, Bi’an is just a worry wart. But sometimes… he does shadow him from afar just to quell his own mind.

Today he’s tracking him to spy on what he’s doing watching from the bushes putting on disguises trying to piece together what he’s up to and he’s taking notes and he’s looking at it like ‘What dastardly deed will he do with a teddy bear, roses, a candle, and a Valentine’s Day card? 🤔’ and it’s only then he realizes what was going on and then he’s suddenly panicking and depressed because he just ruined Wujius surprise for him… He feels like a jerk for also making the assumption Wujiu forgot about him and he comes clean and tells him and Wujius just like ‘…Bibi I’m meant to be the dumbass what the hell’ just teasing him but it doesn’t bug him he just thought it added to the affect ‘A-Jiu you’re not unintelligent, I am for thinking something so ridiculous!… what is this all for anyways?’ A confused look appears on Wujius face. ‘Bibi you did remember it was Valentine’s Day right?’

Crickets.

The longest pause known to man kind.

‘…FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK- A-JIU STAY THERE ILL BE BACK’ because he’d been so busy he DID forget and it honestly makes Wujiu lose his mind laughing because it’s so absurd like something from tv he’s not mad and even try’s telling him it’s fine but Bi’ans just like ‘IM DOING SOMETHING STAY THERE DONT MOVE ILL BE BACK’ and he’s gone for awhile and Wujius just hanging out with the plushies he bought Bi’an and suddenly Bi’an rushes in

And he ties a blindfold on him telling him near nothing and Wujius confused and starts trying to find out what’s happening and Bi’an is just like ‘You’ll see~🥰’ and Wujius just waiting in anticipation and usually something like this would trigger his fight but he trusts Bi’an with every fiber of his being so he’s cool with it even when they start walking in what sounds like a forest he feels nothing but safe with him.

Then through the blindfold he sees a few little lights and then Bi’an stops and takes it off him and they’re at Nantai Bridge and Bi’an decorated the area with fairy lights and flowers and anything that would make it even more magical and he guides him onto the bridge and he had set up a little picnic all of Wujius favorites! From wine to the spicy seasoning he loves and the fancy beef baozi he gets excited for it’s all for him! Then when done they just hold each other for awhile just talking and in the distance fireworks start going off but those were a pure coincidence but Bi’an takes advantage of Wujiu being distracted and leaves his touch for a moment and Wujiu immediately notices and he turns to see Bi’an kneeling with a little box and he’s like ‘Xie Bi’an whats wrong?’ Just oblivious to what’s happening and Bi’an just goes on about how much he loves him more than life itself and he’d do anything to see him smile and he wants to forever call that smile his and he opens the box and there’s a ring and it finally clicks with Wujiu what’s happening and he starts sobbing and falls no hug Bi’an because he’s so happy and Bi’an just waits until he’s calmed down enough and is like ‘Will you marry me?’ And Wujius like ‘YES YES YES YES YES YES YES’ and starts crying more again when he puts the ring on him and just cries a lot out of pure joy and then when he’s stopped crying he just starts tackle kissing Bi’an saying how much he loves him like Bi’an did to him earlier.

It’s the best Valentine’s Day of either of their lives! Perhaps it’s a good thing that Wujius such a little troublemaker.

[dirty-bosmer]

Me again lol. don't know why I asked the last q on anon. I just made a new blog for fandom stuff and am self conscious cause I don't have much on it. Didn't want you thinking I was a bot! Anywho, I've calmed down and actually have another question re: fic writing. I'm considering writing an Oblivion fic (thank you SO MUCH for the insp, fell in love with fic again while reading yours) and am wondering : What was your inspiration for Lucien and his relationship with Nim? It's so deliciously twisted, and I have only read one other fic that braves the territory you do (have you read Love and Blood on FF? also themes of obsession and the author's Lucien is VILE). Kinda rare to see a story that's not afraid of making him actually villainous, wicked, and believably the murderous lunatic he is in game (I dont want prince charming anymore!!!) I mean hear me out, the fanon is fun too and I got a kick out of it for years, but it's SO refreshing to read something beyond another iteration of the smooth, suave, reticent but romantic characterization in dozens of Lucien/Silencer fics.

Got any book recs for characters or relationships like the ones you write about? (hope this okay. I'm srsly just so excited rn like u kno the feeling when you finally get a fic that does it the way you see in your head and are like YES THAT LET ME CONSUME IT anywho here i'm rambling again good day)

My kind of people lmao. First of all, goodness, thank you again! I don’t know what I’m going to do with all these compliments besides become a puddle on the floor. 

That is seriously so sweet of you (despite the morbid nature of the content you are complimenting). And yeah, look, it's a story about two murderers and their descent into madness. The companionship forged between them is obviously not going to be pretty, heh. For a long while, however, I was worried no one would like it cause I gleaned that fanon Lucien is a little more... tame? Or he’s sexy XD Anyway, I've had people comment on how much of a sicko edgelord he is in the fic (both positively and negatively lol). I really appreciate that you love what I’ve done with him but just want to say there is no right or wrong way to do it! There’s stuff out there for everyone’s taste, and I am not and never will write with the intention of making the story palatable to everyone. I decided to give it my all writing him menacing and icky and pyscho cause that’s what intrigued me,. I'm happy with it! And I am Infinitely more happy that you like it too 🥰

And yeah, it makes me feel weird to say aloud that I love all that dark, twisted stuff in fiction, but the heart wants what it wants 🤷‍♀️ I just love a “romance” story that's not actually a romance at all but rather a work of horror— an exploration of the dark recesses of the human psyche that breed obsession and the all-consuming need to devour. I got a healthy, fulfilling relationship irl. I want my fictional characters to squirm a bit, and damn but I want to be equally uncomfortable when I indulge, ya know??

Gonna put the rest under a cut here:

As for inspiration regarding the relationship/Lucien, this is gonna sound so weird lol but Griffith and Guts from Berserk, Hannibal the TV show, the band Deftones (hit me up for song recs). Some creepy uncomfy books that explore similar dark themes: Damage by Justine Hart, The Vegetarian by Han Kang, Lolita by Vladimir Nabakov, You by Caroline Kepnes, Boy Parts by Eliza Clark. Also soooo many movies. There are too many to name (hit me up again hehe).

For Lucien, p much anytime I read/watch a character being a sick little freak I take note of it (see above). I’ve also listened to Dr. Ramani Durvasula’s podcasts about narcissism (she is a doctor of psychology and a leading expert in the field who was studying narcissism loooong before it became a commonly known personality trait). It really helped me understand the human capacity for manipulation and cruelty, how someone can go through life working to get what they want while only being capable of loving themselves. 

Oh, and you know, I looked it up and think I started Love or Blood a really long time ago but haven’t read any fic on FF in years cause the site is p much unusable to me. Was it about Janus Hassildor? I don’t think I ever got to the Lucien bits. Maybe I’ll pick it up again. I’ve read so many Lucien fics, I can surely read another, and if it’s similar tropes, I’ll probably enjoy it. 

While I have your attention, I would be remiss to not mention some other DB/Lucien fics that I enjoy. Next of Kin features a younger Lucien, and he and Tal (the MC) are delightful and dirty and so real. They have a great dynamic. The relationship feels earned. Also Lucien is believably a career assassin and rotten at the core while also retaining his humanity and the capacity for tenderness. I’m picky with romance in general. I can't do heavy handedness and often times I find the characterization of a loving Lucien kind of contrived or saccharine or just not for me (and that’s okay! It wasn’t written for me. We all have our preferences and mine do not skew tender D:), but this is flawlessly executed, lemme tell you. The writing is PHENOMENAL. Truly some of the best I’ve read among fic. I’ve raved about it on my blog, as it’s quite rare to find a story that balances its themes as well as this does. Also Fortune’s Favorite is very dear to me. It features another monstrous Lucien who is undeniably gross and predatory. He’s not the main focus, but the story is otherwise full of angst and sadness. So too light and love and oof, I got misty eyed at several parts. There are multiple relationships in this fic, each of them juicy, but Lucien’s relationship with the MC is a horrific descent, quite a disaster (in the best of ways) and truly so entertaining to read.

So yeah that was... a lot lol. Hope it helps. Also please tag me in anything you write! I get so excited to see new Oblivion fics and would love to talk shop and writing. It’s how we learn knew things and improve :)) 

[butch-bakugo]

Still dont get how it took my mom 19 years to figure out i had autism( or ocd)when as a child, i enjoyed;

Going through the pantry and throwing away expired food like it was a game.

Going through my moms coupon scrapbook and throwing out the expired ones like it was a game

I lined up my hot wheels cars in a row or would sorted them by type/color/texture/size/etc instead of just run them along the hard wood floors cause car go vroom

Refused food of certain textures/didnt like fruit

Actively did not speak unless it was to myself or they needed me to

Talked to myself constantly

Perfered being alone and only having contact when i wanted it

Only seeking out physcial comfort when im sick

Didnt like making eye contact and would actively avoid it

Did not pick up on social cues

Didnt like being hugged or kissed or touched in general

Would actively stim

Couldnt explain why my mom picking up a toy for me would frustrate me

Always have to do things in a specific order or else its wrong

Adored certain tedious tasks but refused to sit and do math

Liked peeling potatos/carrots and other cleaning activities but had a messy room

All my old preschool and kindergarden grades on "socializing with other kids" were mere points above being concerning cause i was always by myself

Picked my eyebrows till they didnt exist and still have a slight bald patch on my head

Loved listening to songs over and over and over even when it would annoy the average person

Liked my jeans with holes in the kness because i could pick at the strings

Perfered to have earbuds in around crowds

Disassociated all the time

Would sing jingles all the time aka vocal stimming

Desperately wanted to tell her everything about the game or show i was into aka hyperfixating and infodumping

Would be into meteorology then not then into marine biology then not

How i could spend hours on minecraft building things and never get bored

Why i would draw obsessively

Why i still sleep with a comfort blanket/stuffed animal well into adulthood and still do

How i had limited energy/limited focus(then got laughed at by my stepdad cause "limited focus isnt a thing" just for her to chew him out about my adhd)

Liked asmr and still do

Why i talk about human psychology as if i wasnt human( i.e me saying "i dont get why humans do this")

My sudden and intense interest in true crime and criminal(and general) psychology

Had quiet/private meltdowns instead of the sterotypical loud and violent ones because of my dad's abuse and intimidation

Lacked empathy and could only manage some base level sympathy

Couldnt read other peoples emotions and mom quite litterally said she dosent know how to speak to me sometimes cause my face looks like a "brick wall when im being happy and when im sad".

Didnt get that saying "the table is dirty" is supposed to mean "could you please clean the table" instead lf just an observation

Me saying sorry all the time wasnt just a trauma responce

Constantly stateing my feelings and clarifying what im trying to get across cause im scared someone might take it a bad way

Not getting sarcasm or jokes unless they are almost comedically obvious

Perfered to deal with negative emotions alone/sent people away when i was grieving/mourning/pissed off

Wanted to do a soft bite as a form of affection(would do it as a kid and still do it to my gf)

Perfered handsewing over the sewing machine

Did "weird" responces to things( hissed at doors and found it funny, stimmed when i got super excited, crane-legged when i got bored, bit my lip when i got bored)

Picked at my scalp

Would only let myself step in squares once or twice and never on the crack or more than the allotted number

Would watch ceiling fans

Watched my feet as i walked with some knowledge of what was infront of me

Was more fascinated by the dead body at funerals of people i didnt really know than comforting the mourners

Make jokes to avoid silence

Always asked if people were angry at me and told people to just tell me how they feel instead of trying to make me figure it out

Never got the whole "i cant ask them out they have to ask me out" thing

Didnt get why certain clothes couldnt be worn to certain places( i.e casual house clothes to church, stained clothing to the store)

The whole "dont invite yourself to spend the night at other people's houses". Bruh i would litterally ask if i could because i wanted to spend more time together then tell them to lie to my mom and say they asked me.

Could handle crawling bugs but not flying ones

Didnt get why i couldn't bring a real knife as a prop for trick or treating. I had no bad intentions but i didnt get why that would scare other people or get legal trouble

Handle stressful situations either with full logic with sympathy or full emotion with low stakes,very little inbetween.

Constantly have to tell people that im not angry and i am interested because i have annoyed and disinterested resting bitch face

Would use my own stories to relate to others instead of just agreeing or sympathizing then never speaking to them again because they said i was making it all about me

Being very open and very honest and not realize when something isnt appropriate to say

Not understanding the difference between someone venting and someone asking for advice

Get irritated at people who stayed in shitty situations without fixing them then vent at me. Go fix ur shit.

Not remembering my friend of 10 years' birthday but could tell you their top 5 games and anime

Not understanding why my classmates started getting bigoted when we learned in elementary school to treat others the way you'd want to be treated

Not getting that correcting someone could hurt their feelings

Not giving a shit about someone's pride. When ur wrong ur wrong and im going to tell you and prove to you that ur wrong. Nothing wrong with being wrong.

Being naive about drugs and alcohol and not being able to tell who is on what when they are clearly on something.

Not being book or street smart, just art smart.

Didnt get why certain objects were girls or boys to the point that i had a genderfluid favorite stuffed animal at like 3yrs old.(litterally one day its a boy and the next a girl)

Didnt see the harm in love triangles/polyamory and straight up said "why dont edward and jacob both just date her? Why dose she have to choose?"

Willing to cut people off at the drop of a hat. Didnt care about pre-existing relationships

Have a high internal moral code i refuse to break

Like the funny part of it all is in 2020, i mentioned to my mom that i might have autism because alot of what was considered signs and behavior of autisitc people fit me. She was all opposed and confused and didnt like my assumptions without a doctor present. Flash forward like 2 months and i asked my therapist if he thought i might be autistic and he said "no doubt. Im surprised you didnt come to me with a diagnosis. I have many autistic patients and you'd fit in pretty well". Now 2 years later and i mention it and my mom's all casual like "oh absolutely your autistic. Your sister isnt,its just adhd but you got somethin else going on." Like thanks mom, could of used the support earilier when you were making me feel like i was too sensitive or crazy 😭😭😭