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becauseimanicequeen · 2 months

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Jin is Not a Flat Character

I debated (with myself) whether or not to get into this discussion that’s been flaring up a lot lately (especially on X), and then just realized I had to get it out of my head. So, here we are…

I won’t be addressing the whole pre-release trailer thing because I’ve seen enough of them and then their series to know that A LOT can change from that initial trailer to the finished product. I always take pre-release trailers with a whole jar of salt. So, I just feel like it would be a waste of time and space to get into that.

Instead, I will look at Jin from the perspective of someone who used to be a fantasy author (before I realized my calling was visual art). So, let me start by establishing some aspects of character creation.

Let’s start with the pair flat vs round characters since “flat” is the aspect I’ve seen many define Jin as:

Flat characters: They often typify one major character trait (e.g., good, evil, funny, smart, etc.) and have no depth.

Round characters (or multi-dimensional characters): They have several traits that are evident, have multiple layers, and are most like real people when it comes to complex personalities. They also have more complex and developed backstories than flat characters (but this doesn’t mean a fully detailed backstory since that can become redundant, it’s more about highlighting the important parts).

Then there’s another pair of opposing aspects that are important, static vs dynamic characters:

Static characters: They don’t experience any major emotional or mental changes throughout the story. You could say that they feel like the same character at the end of a story as they do at the beginning.

Dynamic characters: They experience emotional and/or mental changes throughout the story, which leads them to become different persons/characters. There’s an evident change in who they are at the end of the story compared to who they were at the beginning. This change is often positive (but doesn’t have to be).

A character can be flat and static, round and static, or round and dynamic (I don’t think I’ve ever come across a character that’s flat and dynamic because, logically, those would cancel each other out).

Another pair of aspects I would like to mention is passive vs active characters:

Passive characters: They don’t do much to further the plot. They don’t have any goals and motivations (at least none that matter to the story).

Active characters: Their actions are what keep the plot rolling. They have goals and motivations that drive their actions (and those usually matter to the story).

Flat and static and round and static characters are usually passive characters because they have no or very few goals and motivations, whereas round and dynamic characters can have many complex ones and are, most often, active characters.

To summarize Jin quickly before I present the actual “evidence” of what we’ve seen so far in DFF, I would say that Jin is a round and dynamic character who is monthly active (but has also shown to be passive, depending on the circumstances). This is far from being flat.

But let’s get into the good stuff, the “evidence”:

What We Know and Have Seen of Jin

These bullet points are based on what we’ve seen from episodes 1-11):

Jin is a character with romantic/idealistic views, which could be linked to his artistic soul (since he’s into photography). I feel like some of his actions can be explained by him having an artistic soul.

He lives in a big house that feels remote. Every time we’ve seen him there (so far), he’s been alone (no family members around). I would presume this is common in Jin’s life as he could bring Phee over and have sex against a window for everyone outside to see without Jin being bothered about it.

He stands up to the others (arguably half-heartedly) when they bully Non.

We’ve also seen his reactions several times whenever Non was mentioned after his disappearance. Jin seems far from as unbothered and casual about it as the others who just want to brush it off.

When he develops feelings, they go deep (seen with both Non and Phee).

Reciprocation is important to him as well since he chose not to do anything with Non (even though he liked him) because he knew Non had a boyfriend. It shows up with Phee as well. Jin is the one who suggests Phee stay the night, but he does so after Phee brings him to the lake and shares the significance of that place with Jin (suggesting that Phee made the first move).

He prefers clear communication when there are feelings involved (as shown when he asks Phee what they are to each other).

He clearly connects feelings with sex considering how quickly he got attached to Phee and wanted to know their relationship status.

There’s, at the very least, a sliver of jealousy in him considering how he reacted when he saw Non kiss another boy’s cheek (Phee’s).

He’s emotional and ends up making rash decisions and mistakes in the heat of the moment (e.g., the video).

When in a heated situation, he’s usually the one making an effort to calm it down (like when Non threatened Tee/the group and several times during the whole situation when the gun switched ownership between Fluke, Tee, and Phee).

He doesn’t mind jumping in to defend people, even when they’re being threatened at gunpoint.

These are just a few points off the top of my head. But it shows that we still know a lot about him even though his backstory isn’t as explicitly shown as, for example, Non’s, Phee’s, or Tan/New’s.

Now, let’s look at Jin from the aspects of character creation I wrote about above.

Flat vs Round, Static vs Dynamic, and Passive vs Active

First and foremost, Jin displays several traits and characteristics. He’s friendly, naive, emotional, desperate to be close to someone (possibly because he feels neglected), selfish at times, selfless at other times, impulsive, helpful, courageous at times, etc. This is not the mark of a flat character.

He also experiences emotional and mental changes throughout the episodes we’ve seen so far. If we look at the timeline of the series chronologically (starting with 3 years in the past), Jin seems open and friendly, his romantic/idealistic views are intact (which are shown when he, for example, stands up for Non against the bullies), and he clearly has good feelings for Non.

At the present point in the series (when they’re back at the house in the woods), he’s a lot more closed off (due to what happened to Non and his own part in that as well as the way Phee treated him in the past), his idealistic views are not as intact (he’s gotten used to liars, even told a fair few himself, to the point that he’s not very surprised when Phee confesses about who he and Tan really are), and rather than having good feelings for Non, he’s weighed down by the guilt of his part in Non’s downfall.

Even though these are some examples that illustrate his turn for the worse (or is it?), it’s still a mark of a dynamic character rather than a static one. If he’d still been the naive, idealistic, happy person after all the shit that’s gone down the past 3 years of his life, I would’ve been scared for him (or of him, because that’s just semi-sociopathic behavior). Luckily, Jin has grown to realize that the world isn’t always as great as he might’ve thought and how destructive his own rash decisions can be.

We’ve also been shown time and time again that Jin’s role in the story is important (and bigger than some upset viewers would lead you to believe):

Jin was the one who convinced Non to write the screenplay for the movie.

He defended Non (arguably half-heartedly).

He convinced Non to finish the movie (arguably manipulated him out of selfish desires).

He filmed the video of Non and Keng.

He lied about Non’s disappearance to the police (but, I mean, who would want to cooperate with those corrupt fuckers?).

And he is the one who’s trying to calm down the messy and heated situation at the house (together with what we’ve seen recently of Phee).

This is not a small role. It’s not an insignificant role. He’s the one who took away Non’s parachute in the middle of his tragic downfall, escalating the whole thing. That’s no passive character waiting for things to happen.

And, on the subject of his actions, we can also see his motivations behind them (without having a fully-blown background story).

For one, his romantic/idealistic views are what led him to get angry (alternatively felt betrayed) when he saw Non with Keng and decided to film the video (yes, it was a decision of his, and it turned out to be one of his biggest mistakes). He makes an active decision and he has a motivation for it.

He later finds out how the spread of that video (which he filmed) affected Non (when he threatened them at the house). Jin has felt guilty ever since (which makes him a better person than some of the others). The fact that he actually shows remorse when he talks to Phee about this shows that he has grown and hopefully learned not to make rash decisions based on his emotions (his reaction to Phee’s rejection, for example, is to stonewall Phee rather than hurt him, which is a step forward). A flat and static character wouldn’t grow this much.

As I mentioned above, I feel like some of his actions can be explained by him having an artistic soul. One of them is that he can see the beauty in the mundane (even in the things that others see as ugly). We can take Non as an example.

All the others call him greasy. They think he’s disgusting. Jin, though, is fascinated by him. In one scene, we see him look at Non through Por’s new camera (with heart-eyes, I might add). In another scene, he stares at Non as if spellbound. This could further explain his attachment to Non and his desire to keep Non close.

Another action that can be explained by Jin having an artistic soul is that he knew exactly which buttons to push with Non when he convinced him to stay and finish the film.

Artists of all kinds know what it’s like to be attached to their work (I’m speaking from personal experience). Jin pointing this out to Non (knowing that Non has an artistic soul just like Jin) could’ve been unintentional since he might’ve spoken from his own experience, but it could’ve also been an ace in his sleeve to keep Non close (for selfish reasons).

These are only a few examples of all the facets of Jin’s character, yet, I feel like it’s quite clear that Jin is far from flat. He’s a round, dynamic, and (mostly) active character who plays a big role in the series.

Jin is just as much a main character as Non or Phee (to mention a few) because he’s always had a very central part of the story.

Conclusion

Is Jin a flat character? Absolutely not.

Could he have been developed more (at least up until the 11th episode that we’ve seen)? Yes. Just like White and Top.

(I saw somewhere that someone commented that Sammon had said that her regret was not having developed Jin more, but this is just hearsay, so take it with a pinch of salt.)

But do we need Jin to be more developed? Not really.

We don’t need a full-length backstory for every character to understand them. I believe that characters should be able to stand by their actions without needing a backstory to explain them. And that’s exactly the case with Jin.

He doesn’t need a sob story to make him feel human, like, for example, Por (even though I really, really, really don’t want to admit that Por has, a teeny, tiny, itty, bitty, microscopical sliver of humanity in him). Jin doesn’t need a fully developed backstory like Tee because he wasn’t the kind of asshole Tee was (even though Jin’s mistake was big too). Jin’s actions and motivations are shown through the character itself rather than told through the backstory.

Just because your expectations of a character weren’t met doesn’t mean they’re flat or badly written. Just because you want Jin to have a bigger role doesn’t mean he has a small one. Just because you want to see more of Jin’s backstory doesn’t mean he’s underdeveloped if you don’t get more. Just because you aren’t explicitly told/shown Jin’s backstory and reasons for doing what he does doesn’t mean it’s not there. Sometimes you just have to read between the lines.

Because it is there.

#dead friend forever #dff #dff the series #dff analysis #my shit

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whumpsday · 2 years

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Kane & Jim #41: The Contents of Several Unopened Envelopes Delivered to Kane de Sang

Masterlist

content: vampire whumpee, angst / emotional whump, discussion of abusive relationship

beginning takes place a few days after Clean Break.

Dear Kane,

I’ve moved into my own house. It feels strange, living in a house by myself. It’s quiet. Not that my family home was loud, but there were people. Now there’s no Father, no Mother, no sisters, no servants. No you. Just me.

I’m not alone, of course. I’ve talked to you about my other friends before. They’ve been marvelously helpful, Sylvia especially. I know I’ve said this before, but I think you would like them all. I know they would like you, too, as long as you don’t say anything rude. As always, if you ever want to meet them, let me know.

I’m sure you’ve heard all about the disaster of my eighteenth birthday party, though you didn’t attend. I thought Father might faint. You should have seen the look on his face when I told everyone, it was glorious! He was even more upset than you were.

I know you said not to read your letter, but I did. I apologize. For the record, my answer is a resounding YES. Should you still like to move in with me, nothing would make me happier. I know it was a rather big fight, but you’re my best friend. We’ve made it through worse, have we not?

My new address is attached for you to reply. You don’t need to put a name on the envelope, if you want to keep it a secret. That way your parents wouldn’t know who you’re sending it to.

Yours truly, Bellamy Verta

Dear Kane,

We haven’t seen each other in the longest we’ve ever gone without, I believe. Unless you count the just-shy-of-a-year between my birth and yours. If you sent along a reply to my last letter, I’m afraid it was lost in the mail before it could make its way to me. Or perhaps my own letter was the one that was lost. Though I understand it’s far more likely you simply didn’t reply, just in case, I shall repeat the most important point: I’ve read your letter, my answer is YES.

I’ve managed to acquire ethically-sourced blood. I must admit it is not the most delectable, as you’d predicted, due to the considerable distance it must travel from an area with more amicable interspecies relations. However, such is a small price to pay in order to sustain myself in a way that does not harm others.

I’ve been wondering what you’ve been up to since I left. I think about you quite a lot. Honestly, you’re the only one I still think about, although it’s only been a month. I’d be happy if I never spoke to Father again. I’ve an urge to go back under the cover of day, with one of those full-coverage suits and a large brimmed hat, just to throw garish paint over his house. But I know you would say this is improper and irresponsible behavior, so I will make an effort to restrain myself.

I miss you.

Yours truly, Bellamy Verta

Dear Kane,

I kissed a man.

I don’t know why I’m telling you. It’s been three months and you haven’t replied, so it’s unlikely you’ll respond to this one either. But you would have been the first one I’d tell if things were still like before, so I felt as though I have to. I won’t bore you with the details, but it was nice. I thought you’d like to know, maybe.

We’re not courting. It’s different out here in the real world. You’re allowed to just try things out. The nobility is properly cultish in ways, quite honestly. I think you would like the real world a lot if you gave it a try. My offer still stands. My answer is still yes.

Yours truly, Bellamy Verta

Dear Kane,

I really miss you. I was thinking about it and decided I must write you another letter. I know you were always the one more inclined toward mathematics in our studies, and I’ve taken a page out of your book. Doing the proper research and all. Were you aware that there is a 0.0027% chance that all three of my letters were lost in the mail? I must say, my academic interests still tend toward art and literature, but probability can be fascinating in certain scenarios, when it matters. Not that it matters, as I’m no longer a schoolboy. I’m an adult now. Only 5 months until you are as well!

I was wondering how you were doing. Are you planning on taking a human? No one expects you to have to do that, you’re aware. It’s dangerous due to your condition. I don’t mean this in a condescending way, you know I would never. I simply worry for your safety. Humans have upped their defenses in recent years. I’ve never taken one, and in half a year I’ve managed to make a nice life for myself. You could too, if you wanted.

You know I don’t agree with human-keeping. But if you do, please be safe.

Yours truly, Bellamy Verta

Dear Kane,

Happy birthday!

I couldn’t not send a letter, even if you won’t send one back. Congratulations on coming of age. I’m otherwise strictly not in contact with my family, but I asked Katarina just because I was concerned, and she said that you do not plan on taking a human. It’s for the best, really. You don’t need that. Your parents are even bigger pricks than my own, somehow.

She also told me there will be no celebration, despite the milestone. I know how crushing that must be for you, especially as I’m not even there for our usual bash with just the two of us. I want you to know that my door is always open to you. I will be sure to be home on the eve of your eighteenth. I’m hoping this letter arrives a few days before then. Should you like, you can stop by and we can celebrate.

Yours truly, Bellamy Verta

Kane de Sang

🎊 You have been cordially invited to Bellamy Verta’s 19th birthday! 🎊

Flip this card for time, date, and location information.

Dear Kane,

I know by now that you don’t read these, but I’ve found myself in a bit of an uncomfortable situation, and I’m desperate for your advice. You always gave the best advice, before. Or you usually did. Sylvia says I need to stop writing to you because I’m only hurting myself, but she doesn’t know you. She would like you if she knew you like I do.

I started seeing someone several months ago. My third relationship now, actually. Quite a lot has happened since my last letter. I am proud to now call myself experienced in the art of homosexual activity!

Anyhow, regarding the matter at hand. Henry is a lovely person who I get on with quite well. He reminds me of you in some ways. However, lately he has been acting differently. To put it bluntly, he has become violent with me on multiple occasions. But then afterwards, he’s always back to his normal, kind self again, and I’m all healed by the next night. All my other friends are telling me to break it off, but he’s not always like this. Only sometimes. And other than that, he’s perfect. But it has been more often as of late. It’s hard to explain it all in a letter. If you are in fact reading these, would you be willing to meet and catch up?

I can picture it now. You would shake me by the shoulders and demand I come to my well-lacking senses. Or perhaps you would complicate matters by exchanging blows with him. I don’t think you would be pleased with the situation. But I believe this can be salvaged, if only I can find the right thing to say to him to make him understand that this is frightening me.

I’m also curious as to what you’ve been up to. I miss you.

Yours truly, Bellamy Verta

Dear Kane,

Maybe you do read these. I’m unsure. I thought I’d send along an update, just in case you are reading and not responding. I know you would have been worried about me if that was the case. I did end up breaking things off with Henry. He did not react well, but it’s over now.

I’m still interested in catching up, should you like to. I apologize if that was too much to put on you. We aren’t even really friends anymore, I suppose. But I’d like to be again.

Despite that bump, things have been pretty wonderful. There are so many things I wish I could share with you. I think you would be really happy here, if you gave it a chance.

7.29e-8%, otherwise known as 0.0000000729%. I think the point at which they start introducing “e” to mathematics is when the whole subject becomes truly irredeemable.

Yours truly, Bellamy Verta

Dear Kane,

I anticipate that this will be my last letter. Unless you respond, of course.

There will always be room in my heart for you. I would not be the person I am today without your friendship. But I have a new life now, a far better life than I did before, even if there are still troubles. And, though supportive, my friends are tired of hearing my heart ache for you. I find myself agreeing with them. I’m tired of it, too. It’s been a year and a half.

I wish nothing but the best for you, always. My door is always open to you should you change your mind and decide to get in contact. If I ever have a change-of-address, I shall send notice by mail, so you will be able to reach me.

I suppose this is goodbye. I would rewrite this on paper clear of teardrop stains, but I sincerely doubt you’ll be reading this anyway, so I shall leave it as-is.

I always loved you. I still do.

Bellamy Verta

drabbles posted between #40 and #41:

Accident (Epilogue #1.5)

taglist:

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#kane and jim #whump #my writing #vampire whumpee #angst #emotional whump #whump writing

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saelestia · 3 months

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i am receiving lots of questions as to why i am not in contact with abbie / @mirinae, and heres what i have to say about the matter --

DISCOURSE mentions of pedophiles, comments towards minors, so on..

1) me and abbie’s friendship had taken a rocky start, where the first time she had interacted with anything of mine, was her replying under a post where i thanked my followers for reaching 2k, in which she had said something along the lines of; "woah 2k you have nearly 4x my following" which, could be brushed off as admiration/support. i found it flat-out weird since i think comparing yourself and someone else is completely weird in itself especially being a first impression – and it only gets weirder with time. while abbie’s and my friendship progresses. abbie had took it upon herself to post about creating a collab with me, without my prior knowledge to the fact we were to maybe do a collab together. After that, friend x, comes into the story and he invites me and abbie to join a server (the people in said server are lovely, and have no relevance, and dont play any part in any malicious things mentioned to be done by abbie, and generally aren’t involved in the situation, outside of the second paragraph).

2) Once we joined the server, abbie had been nice, and sweet in general to all members of the server, which i had no issues, or no comments about. However, something peaked my attention, when writers in said server began to exchange tumblr users with abbie, she had immediately acted as if she had known/read the work from those writers, despite saying “she only writes jjk for the notes” while those said writers were predominately jjk writers. Now the real issue applies when abbie begins to bring up follower counts, as she had previously done with me, mentioned above. I was viewing, but wasn’t fairly active in the chat, i had seen my url come up alongside one other writers, being mentioned by abbie. Someone had brought up the fact that said writer was famous, to which abbie responded, agreeing and calling them famous alongside the other people. Someone had told abbie “you’re famous too abbie” in which they had a playful back and forth about their followers. i hadn’t been involved, let alone hadn’t been adding to the conversation, aside from me encouraging and supporting those who had mentioned their follower count. Abbie had begun bringing me into the thing they had going on, saying “SAELESTIA AND @(URL) ARE FAMOUS” “RAIN IS MORE FAMOUS THAN ME” etcetc.

Side note ; abbie had come to me while on the discussion of a previous situation happening on tumblr, about how, “if it were to happen to her, she would change her name to ares” which caught me off guard, as a long term online friend of mine’s name is ares, and had a few days prior, sent an ask to my inbox, addressing himself for the first time on this blog.

(Click to Read Full. )

3) I hadn’t brought the topic up to anyone, aside from friend x, i had told friend x that “if i texted abbie about important things, she wouldn’t care unless it is something to do with my followers” as i had begun growing more suspicious as to why she had been doing the things she was/acting the way she is. Friend x had suggested i a.) drop abbie, or b.) sort out miscommunications, as after i did end up following through with asking/telling abbie about stuff i had found important, such as ; a friends art, my puppies opening their eyes, me getting an 100 on an exam, me having an upcoming exam, etc. to which she had simply responded with “oh?” until i had mentioned that i had reached 3k. She had immediately begun typing in caps, calling me famous and so on.

4) After i had sent that message, i had sent the screenshots to friend x, who had begun to see the way that abbie was acting had affected me. Friend x had advised me to drop abbie, but i had wanted another opinion incase i was looking too deep into the matter. I had begun to talk to friend y. Friend y had immediately understood and agreed with my concerns about abbie, and was being very respectful and helpful with the matter. I had question abbie as to why she only excitedly responded to my message when it was about my followers, to which she’d respond how she didn’t see anything else as worth caring about. ( in the screenshots above and below)

5) Abbie had then reached out to friend x, asking them for advice on how to pursue the situation with me, which i found odd, considering:

1. Abbie has used the fact she has communication issues to avoid conflict, while also stating she likes and enjoys drama.

2. Abbie hadn’t brought these issues to me.

after a discussion with abbie, friend x, had given abbie a little bit of advice, and what he thought was input on how i felt, to which, abbie had come out with excuses for herself as to why she had been acting the way she was. Saying how she couldn’t tell when i was “joking or being serious.” but any person who could pick up on social cues could realize/pick up on a joke based on the joking tone. From then, abbie had apologized, one sentence, and without any accountability being held. In response, i said “k” and hadn’t texted her all day, my final text being one of me dropping her. In response to me blocking + dropping her, she went to the server that was mentioned earlier, and ranted in the vent channel that her life sucks because i dropped her, while also providing little to no context as for why.

6) After being informed that i was still in the groupchat, she had went out of her way to dm friend z about her side of the situation, still leaving out key details. Friends x and y had felt bad for the stuff abbie was saying, and had both reached out to friend z to let her know the truth about the situation, after which abbie would continue to talk about me, resulting in me sending out a second message, and eventually needing a third. After the final message, abbie had blocked me, changed her discord url, and her display name to mirinae, and jinko. recently, a new account has surfaced on tumblr, and has been shared to me by others. the url belonging to abbie, who has begun acting like a friend of herself. after i left the collab, she was persistant on regrouping friend z into her collab, in attempt to save her collab, rather than hosting on her own.

7) Now you might be thinking, how does this situation become more serious? In between the story, abbie has done other things to further cause distaste, and discomfort between her, x, y, z and myself. General Summarized List

Being upset when me and x jokingly flirt in front of her

Calling friend z (who’s a minor) “bae”

Sympathizing for a ped0phille

Supporting a racist artist

Victimizing herself

Manipulating and guilt-tripping people into joining her collab after i had left

Misgendering someone

Misgenering X countless of times (despite them going by the same pronouns the entire time we’ve known him.)

She then blocked me, changed her discord url to Jinko, and mirinae. Her new account is @mirinae, her old blog was haithamvoid and that is all i have to say as of now.

#tw. discourse #discourse #ugh #ok thats all gbye

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mondfahrt · 2 years

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Questions About Art

In the last couple of weeks, you've probably seen a few twitter threads like these (or their re-posts on tumblr) about the "decline" of art and architecture. Now, these kinds of posts (and people like The Cultural Tutor especially) have a lot of fascist red flags that other people have pointed out much more eloquently than I ever could, but I'd like to give my own two cents about why this view on art, architecture and their history proposes a lot of problems but also some questions that are worth getting into.

Some of the problems I'll be talking about are directly from these twitter threads, some I saw in the comments of these threads, and some I've encountered in my daily life. I'm not saying these are all fascist! In fact, a lot could just be labelled as "things you learn about art history when you don't spend years studying it". This mindset and this kind of bias are, as you will see, very very old and there are reasons why we still struggle with them today.

I kind of want people to know about arguments I rarely see talked about in non-academic spaces. Diversify the public discourse, if you will. I know some of these things tend to get complicated but I've tried to keep it as simple as possible. But if you have any questions about any of this, please ask! I can talk about art all day every day.

Also, I'm not claiming to know everything. If nothing here seems to make sense to you, that's fine, too. I'd really like to know your opinion, though! And if I've made mistakes and you know better: Please tell me!

(I also really understand that engaging with these kinds of arguments is maybe kind of pointless. People will see and like and think what they will see and like and think. Art has always been devisive. But I love talking about art and I think I do have some perspective on this topic. And the discussion is kind of the point here. Also, if you read those threads on twitter, most comments are actually saying some good stuff. Not everything is mindblowingly wrong. I'm elaborating on some of it.)

Okay, let's get this thing going!

1. What is supreme?

There are several problems here: The choice of vocabulary is probably the least offensive. But this person presents their opinion (and it is simply that) as fact while assigning subjective values to the Pietá. What is extraordinary? What is beauty? Why is it surpreme? Is it because of the assumed value of marble, historically taken as a luxurious material when it isn't really any better than any other stone... Is in fact worse under certain circumstances because it really doesn't like getting wet... But I don't think this person wants to talk about that here. I think what they really mean is: It takes skill to make stone look like flesh or fabric.

Now, the problem with this is: It's a myth. Granted, we'll maybe have to leave Michelangelo out of it, because apparently he did do a lot of the work himself, but... a lot of artists did not. In fact, the artist as this unique genius working on his own, all by himself, is a narrative that's been pretty much established because of Michelangelo and the way art history has literally been built on top of his legacy. But most artists, before, during, and after Michelangelo's time, had whole workshops and teams of people working for and with them. We don't know a lot of medieval artists today because they didn't think it was important who had done the work. They shared their skills and time and resources to make and build and craft. Same goes for artists during the 17th century, because most of them still needed the help of craftspeople to make a bronze cast, for example. Sometimes we still can't decide if something is "by Leonardo da Vinci" or by one of his students or made in his workshop because sometimes an artist had an idea, drew a sketch and let other people do things like the background or details he didn't have the time for because he was busy inventing planes. And no one really cared because it was still from his workshop and having him paint the whole thing would've cost a lot more. Not only money but also time.

What we can see here, over time, is the development of the narrative of the artist as genius, and the devaluaziation of workshops and crafts in comparison to art.

2. What is an artist?

This is funny because idea, concept, and intellectual work in general are initially what seperated art and craft. The male artist as genius who creates something (the Pietá) out of nothing (a block of marble) is an important narrative! Saying that Jeff Koons' works are worse because he didn't do it himself is kind of ridiculous because it's nothing new. Artists have done this for centuries. And devaluing his work because it's only an idea/a concept is even funnier because that's one of the most important aspects of art in the early modern period.

For comparison: This is one of Jeff Koons' Balloon Dogs, mirror-polished stainless steel with transparent color coating (here in magenta), 121 x 143 x 45 inches (307.3 x 363.2 x 114.3 cm), made between 1994-2000.

Douglas Crimp says,

"The extraordinary status that has accrued to the work of art during the modern period is, in part, a consequence of the romantic myth of the artist as the most highly specialized, indeed unique producer. That this myth obscures the social division of labor was recognized by Minimal artists. Traditional sculpture's specialized craft and highly fetishized materials were opposed by Minimalism with the introduction of objects industrially fabricated of ordinary manufactured materials." (1)

Jeff Koons is not a Minimalist. Their works from the 1950s and 1960s looks more like this.

This is Carl Andre's 4 Square 4 Void, installation 2018, 12 unit hollow square on floor, 0.5 x 160 x 160 cm.

Minimalists like Andre intended to completely erase the hand of the artist by using materials that had to be very obviously made with machines. This is where another art myth comes in as well: "I could have done that." Yes, that's the point. Minimal art is supposed to let you reflect on the way we lift artists to higher standards. Why would you treat Andre's metal squares differently than the concrete floor their lying on? You're actually even invited to walk on these! To reflect the way you experience the room around you, with the artwork and your body in it... (The Minimalists had a whole thing going on relationships between art, space and viewer as a critique of the supposedly "neutral" gallery or museum space but that's a topic for another day.)

The Minimalists (Carl Andre, Sol LeWitt, Dan Flavin, Donald Judd...) also did these high finishes like Koons, very shiny surfaces that show no traces of brushes or chisels. You're not supposed to think these have been done by one person. And if they're not done by a person but by a machine, or by a whole group of people working these machines, then who is the artist? What is an artist? And can anyone be an artist?

3. Is it art if you (don't) need to explain it?

They also wanted to make art accessible. Since the kind of art the Minimalists did was pretty much completely new and unheard of in the 1960s, no one understood it, which meant that everyone started on the same level. You're just supposed to feel their art, its position in the room and in relation to your body. Everyone can do that. No academic advantage. Some critics were furious about that.

Of course, this concept falls apart a bit when you think about art historians and critics engaging much more with art in general, talking to artists and other historians, knowing about materials etc. You'll never get a completely even playing field, if you ask me, but at least the Minimalists tried to do something.

In contrast: The twitter post above claims that the Pietá needs no explanation or context. But that's not exactly true, is it? Sure, you can appreciate it without knowing anything about it. Pain like that translates well in any case, I think. But being at least culturally Christian puts you miles ahead of everyone else already. Knowing that that's the Virgin Mary, mother of Jesus, who's lying in her arms, dead... otherwise these two people could be lovers, or siblings, or friends. It's also placed in a church, you can't really get close to it, which could make it hard to even see that the man in the woman's arms is dead, at first glance he could just be unconscious, even sleeping. Not having this context doesn't make this work less impressive, on a skill-level, but it does add some things.

Context matters.

Which takes me to one point in the discussion on twitter that actually makes me angry.

4. What is context?

The OP says that they don't know what to think about these sculptures. Maybe you don't either, that's completely fair! Let me add some context:

On the left: Veronica Ryan's Custard Apple (Annonaceae), Breadfruit (Moraceae), and Soursop (Annonaceae), all from 2021. Now, I had to research this but it was fairly easy. I just used Google. The titles suggest that these are fruit. The fact that they are the UK's first public sculpture dedicated to the Windrush generation makes me think that they're probably culturally and historically important to these people specifically. People from the Caribbean, where the artist was born and where these fruits are common, who migrated to the UK.

I like this anecdote from an article in iNews on the day the sculpture was unveiled in London:

"On a wet October morning, shoppers wheeling trolleys nodded in recognition as they passed the work. A mother fielded questions from her young daughter, identifying the soursop for her and explaining what it was as they walked away. As Ryan posed for photographers, a young man sped past, pointed at the marble sculpture and shouted “sugar-apple!” - “That’s right!” the artist shouted back, beaming." (2)

I know what the Pietá is depicting, I've learned about it from growing up as a Christian and studying art history. I had to google what a soursop was, but other people have grown up with them and look at this sculpture, already knowing what it means.

Context matters.

I also think it's important to know that this is the first public sculpture in the UK by a Black woman. And I love that Ryan says she wants these sculptures of fruits to be a part of the community, to bring people together like food tends to do, to remind people of good things, to give them a place to sit or rest or climb on.

The Pietá sits high and mighty, untouchable, holy, and that's for a reason, too. But I like that sculpture like Ryan's, made from marble and bronze just like so many sculptures from the Renaissance, can also be like this, public and warm.

I don't have to understand everything about it. I have never eaten a sugar-apple, or a breadfruit. This is not art made for me. It does not need to be. But I can still find something in it, if I open my mind, do a bit of research, and don't expect everything to be spelled out for me.

Now, the sculpture on the right is a bit more complicated: It's Heather Phillipson's THE END, 2020, and it was placed in Trafalgar Square, London, on the so-called Fourth Plinth. The Fourth Plinth is a public art project intended to diversify the monuments in London. The other three plinths on Trafalgar Square all carry statues of white British men (two generals and one king). The fourth plinth was supposed to carry another general but the funds ran out and it remained empty until the 1990s, when it was decided that it would instead show different works of contemporary art temporarily, specifically commissioned for this place. Phillipson's work is supposed to look playful, joyful, even tasty, but with a darker twist. The drone on top of the whipped cream sculpture is recording a live feed of Trafalgar Square, a commentary on surveillance in public spaces, even - or especially - if those public spaces are places for people to come together and enjoy life and culture. The sculpture is not taking itself very seriously, just as it is poking fun at the seriousness of other (public) art, like the generals and kings surrounding it, or the paintings in the National Gallery behind it, but it's also political. Who does a public square belong to? Do we know who's watching us at any given moment? But also: Who are we watching? Everyone can watch the sculpture's live feed, all the people on the square, but also every statue of a dead white man there.

5. Do you need to be told this is art?

At this point, I do think OP is arguing in bad faith here. I'm not saying you have to like any of these artworks. Or that you have to understand them immediately, or get anything out of them. But they are so much more than just "shock factor". Actually, most of modern, postmodern and contemporary art is about so much more than shock factor, especially public sculptures. I've only talked about those here because the OP on twitter only talked about those but it's also my field of study. And I still needed to research a lot to write this, so I don't expect anyone to understand anything immediately. But when it comes to art, I urge people to keep an open mind. Most artworks are much more meaningful than you'd expect and I bet I could actually tell you a lot about Michelangelo's Pietá you didn't know that would change its interpretation to you.

Here are a few just for fun:

This is the only statue by Michelangelo with a signature. We're not sure why exactly that is. Because he saw this as a great work and was proud of himself? Or because he was only at the beginning of his career when he made it and needed to build a reputation?

Mary looks much too young in this to have an adult son. It's an anachronism that's maybe pointing towards her later ascension. Or towards some kind of "beautiful people are moral and good" metaphor that was very prominent during the Renaissance. Or maybe Michelangelo just didn't want to make an older woman.

This work is a masterpiece of composition: You don't even realise that Mary is much larger than Jesus because she's sitting and because her dress is so voluminous. But it's also only brilliant when you're looking at it from the front. It's placed in a church, in front of a wall, so you can't even see behind it. That means, Michelangelo didn't need to do a full piece that's amazing and interesting from all sides - which is, incidentally, a factor that becomes very popular during the Late Renaissance.

I think that last point is interesting because sculptures like those by Phillipson and Ryan do need to be interesting from all sides, since their placed in an open space. They need to do something with the space around them, not just with one wall in a church.

These sculptures are not random. Not even when you don't know what the artists wanted to do with them. If you get something else out of THE END or Custard Apple, that's fine! That's not random, that's just one way to look at art, it's interaction, it's dialogue.

6. What is the conceptual foundation of art?

We can disagree on this but I don't think the "conceptual foundation of modern art" is to question accepted standards of what art can be. (Setting aside that OP is most likely mixing up modern and contemporary art here.) There are hundreds of movements, styles, and theories in art. Andre, Koons, Phillipson and Ryan are just four artists out of thousands, and each one wants to do something different with their art. Yes, some of them want to question what art can be. Some want to question the assumed neutrality of the gallery. Some want us to think about our bodies in space. Some want to make political statements about surveillance. Some want to see their heritage represented in public.

Some of my favourite artists want to make you think about life and death and all the love we share in between. How we interact with people daily. Or how the world around us keeps moving and changing. Some want to make statements about gender and bodies, or the environment, or colonialism, or capitalism. Some want you to see all the shadows on a white canvas. Some just really like a certain shade of blue.

Art can be so many different things. I love Medieval art, and Renaissance art, and art from the Enlightenment... (I even have friends who study these periods in art history!) No work of art, no period in art history, is superior to another.

OP of the thread - as well as commenters like Mike Brook - assume that contemporary art is only one thing. They argue that idea and concept and meaning trump everything in contemporary art, that form has become meaningless. That's true for some artworks, concept art in particular, or art that can be reproduced again and again. Looking down at that art, criticizing it as meaningless or only interesting because of its shock factor, misses the point, though. And it is - and this is important - incredibly elitist.

7. What is art?

This is an argument we've had since the beginnings of art history - when one of Michelangelo's friends, Giorgio Vasari, published biographies of artists, likening them to nobles and popes and highlighting their unique skills in order to make them out to be geniuses. That meant, in turn, that you couldn't simply become an artist, but that you were born to be one.

Vasari had such an influence on art history - he's actually said to be the "father of art history" - that we still have to unravel these narratives today. Because when Vasari wrote these biographies, these stories, he only included the (in his opinion) greatest artists of all, with Michelangelo coming out on top. He's the reason we have an art historic canon, a set of artists who are considered important and great and worthy of study and admiration and remembrance. Of course, Vasari mostly included Italian artists because most art from north of the Alps was not as great. And anyone before Michelangelo couldn't be as great as Michelangelo because you needed to show progress, that art was moving forward, becoming better and better. Art made by women was always depicted as being less good than that made by men. And so on, and so forth...

The same narrative goes for understanding art. There are several instances throughout art history when people (mostly old white men) cried about the supposed "end of art". It happened with the Impressionists, with the Dadaists, with the Minimalists, with concept art and installation art and so on.

In 1967, art critic Michael Fried published an essay called "Art and Objecthood" in which he criticized Minimal art (especially in comparison to Modernist art) as being literal and theatrical. It is one of the most cited essays on contemporary art in recent decades. You might ask yourself, what about Carl Andre's metal plates on the floor could be theatrical? Literal can be understood: They are literally metal squares on the floor. They don't pretend to be anything else, like how Michelangelo's marble pretends to be Jesus, or how Ryan's bronze pretends to be fruit. In this way, they can be understood by everyone. You don't have to have read the Bible or been to the Caribbean to "understand" a metal square. You are simply supposed to experience your body in relation to it. That also means that the artwork speaks to every person differently and individually, because no one can experience art out of any body other than their own.

"Theatricality" to Fried means superficiality, deception, and emptiness of meaning. If a work of art doesn't claim to be anything else than what it is, it's superficial. If anyone can find different, individual meaning in a work of art, no one can really know what the artist wants to say, so it's deceptive. And if the artist doesn't care about universal meaning being found in their work, it must be meaningless.

Christa Noel Robbins says on Fried's essay:

In catering to each viewer in their turn, the ability of the work of art to transcend atomized taste and enter into something like a community of meaning making is foreclosed. Absent that community, Fried has long argued, a work of art has no real meaning; it is particularized, isolating the viewer in their own individuated field of experience. (3)

If a work of art doesn't transcend to give us some higher meaning, a meaning that's the same for everyone, is it art? Or is it an object?

That's basically what people who question any and all contemporary art, who ask "what is an artist?", have problems with. They don't want to see that a sculpture is just a block of marble, no matter the form. The form doesn't make it any less a block of marble, something very normal, and earthly, and not "supreme" at all. And not everyone will find (or needs to find) higher meaning in that block. Only if someone does find higher meaning in it, does it become art at all - Michelangelo's sculpture needs the viewer, just like the metal squares need the viewer to make them into art. Into more than objects. But this process is extremely subjective, for Michelangelo just as much as for Andre or Ryan.

"Anything can be art," complains The Cultural Tutor in another tweet. But that's not the real problem they have. The problem is: If anything can be art, and I don't like some of that art and I don't even think it's art, who's to say that Michelangelo's Pietá is art? If I can question contemporary art, isn't everything else in danger to be questioned as well?

(1) Douglas Crimp: "Serra's Public Sculpture", in: Rosalind Krauss (ed.): Richard Serra/Sculpture, New York 1986, pp. 40-56, p. 44. (2) Hettie Judah: "Veronica Ryan’s celebratory giant fruit are a lesson in how to do public sculpture well", in: iNews, 10/01/2021, URL: https://inews.co.uk/culture/arts/veronica-ryan-windrush-monument-fruit-sculpture-hackney-london-review-1227786. (3) Christa Noel Robinson: "The Sensibility of Michael Fried", in: Criticism 60:4 (2018), pp. 429-454, p. 432.

#art history #art #contemporary art #modern art #women artists #michelangelo #veronica ryan #carl andre #heather phillipson #michael fried #art criticism #turner prize #minimalism

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plofisto · 1 year

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INACTIVE.

hello, everyone! back with a more easy format for this. my name is abbi! i am eighteen years old ( she / her pronouns ) and i have been roleplaying for about seven years. i love animation, drawing and listening to spotify playlists for fandoms and original characters! i'm looking for new long-term, 1x1 roleplays so, i am opening up a roleplay partner call. if you're interested, please message me or like this post, though i prefer the former!

what i'm looking for! —

friends outside of roleplaying!

piggybacking off my previous point, but sharing art, making spotify playlists, sharing aesthetics, etc!

as already mentioned, i am looking for a long-term 1x1 roleplay.

worldbuilding!!

activity! i’m generally a very active person and can send multiple replies throughout the day. i understand life is busy but communication is important to me while roleplaying! if i will be unavailable, i’ll do my best to tell you!

more information, specifically my preferences, tropes, fandoms, etc are below!

my preferences! —

i'm fluent in english. i write in third person and past tense with semi-literate to literate responses depending on the circumstances of the roleplay! i also use lowercase for aesthetic purposes.

be 18+ please! my limit is those above twenty five!

i roleplay only on discord, where my pen name is different! after we discuss the basics, we can exchange usernames! i also only roleplay in mini private servers, and i do not use bots.

i'm a plot oriented person, so i only participate in roleplays where both parties are willing to play multiple characters! of course, we discuss who is who, but regardless, i do not only play a love interest. i also have a few limits about characters i won’t play, especially in star wars, but we can discuss that in private!

canon / canon, oc / oc and oc / canon!! f / m, f / f, m / m, nb / nb, m / nb, f / nb!! i love variety! i won't just do one of either category, especially f / m oc / canon ships! give me all kinds of ships.

i love doing more than one roleplay at a time, especially with different fandoms! however, i won't do two roleplays just for the sake of our ocs. let's create a plot that features both of our ocs!

speaking of ocs, the more, the merrier! i love creating ocs and hearing about ocs others make! the probability of me wanting to kiss your oc on the head will most likely be extremely high.

the occasional smut is fine, though i don't like it being the focus of the roleplay.

i don't use real people as faceclaims. i use my own artistic abilities, picrews or animated faceclaims! i don't roleplay with people who steal art. i would also prefer if future roleplay partners don’t use real life faceclaims.

i use forms for my ocs occasionally! it really depends on if you do or don't, anything is fine by me!

from the bottom of my heart, i do not care about what you ship. however, i will not include incest, non-con, underage, pedophilia or anything along those lines. we can talk about other general limits/triggers in private!

inactivity. i understand everyone is busy, but communication is extremely important! if no one is talking for at least a month, i automatically delete the server or leave it. i’m a very patient person, however, so communicate and we can figure something out!

things i want to write! —

forbidden love

enemies to lovers

lovers to enemies

slow burn

fluff, action, angst!!

found family

canon / canon, oc / oc, oc / canon!! f / m, f / f, m / m, nb / nb, m / nb, f / nb!! again, variety! i am very open to ships!

fandoms, will be updating this continuously! —

star wars, aka the fixation rn: the clone wars, the bad batch, the tales of the jedi. please have seen tcw and tbb if you're interested! i also like to incorporate legends. i am quite opinionated about canon characters and i’m also jedi order neutral.

overwatch: unfortunately, i have not played the game. however, i am very familiar with the lore. and i love blackwatch era!

transformers: transformers prime and bayverse / knight ( preferably lore / select characters from all continuities ) and influences from comics!

dc animation: earth-16, dcau, dcamu and influences from comics! i love the lantern corps and justice league!

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g0ldgauntlet · 11 months

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Let's discuss the aftermath!

I wanted to make a follow-up to this post just to express how grateful I am for so many people going out of their way to support me. The reception was a tad bit overwhelming for me, I'll admit, but in the end I was extremely happy to see so many positive responses and shares!

I was initially a bit nervous to blaze that post, as I was aware of differing opinions on artists who use Tumblr Blaze to promote their art and commissions, especially if they're in need of assistance. I felt like I was taking a gamble, and that it was like a coin flip - This was either going to go really well, or really poorly and I'd get a lot of hate sent my way. However, given my situation, I felt like the risk was worth taking anyway.

Fortunately for me, I received mostly overwhelming support and well wishes, so thank you all for the help!

Over time, though, I did notice that I had received a few replies, and I chose to respond to the ones that I felt were most worth noting/contributed to starting a conversation (the other ones were either blatantly insulting me or complaining about posts like mine being blazed in the first place).

That is simply not true, as you can see below from the time that I took this screenshot:

I made a conscious decision to add that onto my post, and I'm sticking with it. It adds context to my situation that clearly enough people could make inferences towards, given the hardships that each respective group who identifies as such things deals with. I'm not the first person on Tumblr to include that either, and the other people who did received support all the same. So, I made my choice.

If you personally don't care (which, no offense, I'm certain that you don't because I don't believe that you sent that to me with good intentions), you either could have just said that instead or simply moved on.

Thank you for the suggestion! Fortunately, I have considered this several times in the past already and was job searching even before my commissions post was blazed. Even after blazing it, I am still searching for a job.

My post was made because of the fact that getting a job (a well-paying one too, mind you) is, unfortunately, not as easy as I wish it was. I was looking for ways to gain more money as soon as possible to speed up the process of moving out and helping my mom with paying for expenses. However, I haven't given up on the search just yet! I know that I'll get there eventually.

This section is going to be longer, but to this, I have to say:

Absolutely not.

Most people wouldn't know this, but out of those three lgbtq-related things that I listed, being biromantic was actually the last thing that I realized about myself.

Being asexual (specifically, demisexual) was the first thing that I realized, and it will forever have an emotionally positive impact on my life because it explained so much about myself with just one label.

Being nonbinary (specifically, a demigirl) was the second thing that I realized, and it made it easier to explain how I felt about my gender identity: Sometimes I feel more like a woman (and I'm cool with feminine terms/being called one), and other times I feel like I don't fit in that sort of realm and like being seen/referred to in a more neutral sense.

Being biromantic came last because, for me personally, I was very unsure if this was something that I "deserved" to call myself. I knew I liked boys from the start but I always had a complicated relationship with how I felt about girls, and it wasn't until many years later that I finally came to terms with that aspect of myself. Even when I started to identify as ace and nonbinary, I was still unsure about whether or not I was straight (I guess you could say that I was bicurious/questioning). It wasn't that long ago that it finally hit me and I became more comfortable with identifying as bi. To this day, I'm still exploring that aspect of myself.

Even though the realization of being bi came last, it's not any less important to me than the other parts of myself are, and I listed them all for a reason. As I stated before, it adds context to my situation because of the hardships that each person who identifies as such faces. You seem to at least recognize that as far as being bi goes (and in my case, especially for bi women/femmes and how much danger they're put in when they're not closeted), but fighting for the right to be nonbinary is just as important, given that it's literally under the trans umbrella. Trans people of any identifier matter too, dude.

Also, considering that ace discourse is still very much a thing that I had the misfortune of seeing and being subjected to, as well as ace people also being documented as having been subjected to discrimination/put in danger at the hands of other people who think they need to be "fixed," it very much matters a lot.

And finally, I can get to my last point for this section:

I can't "dump" being black.

I saved this for last because it felt like the most obvious point to me - From the moment I was born until the day I die, I will always be a black femme, and everyone around me will see me as a black woman because I cannot hide the way that I look. Ever since I was a kid, it had shaped my life and the way that other people perceive me. Things were rough because of that, and things are still rough now.

I can imagine that perhaps the reason why other people pitched in to help me is because they recognized that being black, femme, and queer leads to a lot of rough circumstances throughout one's life, and my aforementioned dangerous environment in my blazed post contributed to that because, unfortunately, I've come to learn and experience that my family is full of bigots who especially neglect and tear down women. I don't think I had to say that outright in the blazed post to get my point across, and it looks like other people got the message.

You may think it's nonsense, but each and every part of my identity is important to me as an individual. If someone felt deterred from my post because I added that descriptor for myself, then that's their decision. I wasn't gonna hide that just to please another person - I'm happy with this being who I am and I wanted others to understand the seriousness of the situation.

Now, this next reply below I think was hidden from me by Tumblr because I didn't see it until a friend of mine sent me a screenshot:

My response to this is basically summed up through this post and its replies but I'll elaborate anyway.

Making an investment to advertise myself does not mean I'm suddenly hoarding a load of secret cash somewhere. If you want to insinuate that, then you must think that of every other artist on this platform who chose to blaze their posts in hopes of promoting themselves, which is disingenuous to assume.

I set a certain amount of cash aside to blaze that post (I didn't even spend it on the largest option, mind you) because I was also hoping that I could make up for the money I spent to blaze it in the first place, and you know what? It was worth it! All of the funds I received from people who were kind enough to donate or commission me more than made up for how much I paid for Blaze, so I have no regrets over what I've done.

That aside, I'm all for artists blazing their commission posts if they have enough funds to afford doing so. We should promote and support artists, because it's not like it's uncommon knowledge that social media platforms screw us over more often than not, and that artists have a hard time getting paid in the first place. Heck, I've even talked about Twitter suspending me randomly and not getting any response to my appeal - Tumblr Blaze was quite literally my most available option to attempt obtaining visibility, aside from using Instagram. So, by all means, artists can blaze their posts all they want. I'll never complain about it.

Anyways, I saw this as I was reading through the reblogs on my post:

You're not being rude at all, no worries! Honestly, whenever someone says that my prices are too low, I feel flattered because it means that someone sees a lot of worth in my art to the point that they believe that I should be getting paid more than what I normally charge.

I did make the chibi price that low specifically because I was hoping to make it more affordable, since I know that there are lots of people who don't have specific, large amounts of cash to spare. The way I saw it is that if someone could spare at least 1 dollar, or however much money they could afford to send my way, then that would quickly stack up as more people sent me funds through Ko-Fi. However, I'll consider raising those prices in the future when I get things settled irl!

All in all, I must once again say thank you to everyone who's been helping me! I'll be forever grateful for the support sent my way (and I know my mom is just as grateful too), and I hope that other artists can receive the same support that I was given!

#gold's rambles #artists on tumblr #artistsupport #digital artists #art community #artblr #tumblr blaze #blog post #personal blog #lgbtq #queer #transgender #nonbinary #demigirl #bisexual #biromantic #asexual #demisexual #black artist #drawing while black #censored most of the usernames so hopefully the more negative responses don't get any traction outside of this post #and also because i don't want to run the risk of anyone getting harrassed #if anyone does recognize the censored users in the screenshots and doesn't agree with what they said then please just block them #left the reblog uncensored because the person in question let me know that they're cool with it being seen #but yeah this is the only time i'll be addressing this and then it's onto much more positive stuff from here #gold's art #adding the personalized art tag since i put more effort into the thank you image haha #finally figured out how to use my watercolor brushes properly

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phantom-witch · 1 year

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Phantom's Finished: Doki Doki Literature Club!+

DISCLAIMER: This is specifically about the Side Stories new to the console release, as that is basically its own game and I am unable to play the base game. Furthermore, it was through my partner @shioripresents so I didn't have to play the base game due to triggers! No Meta/Psychedelic horror triggers but there IS...

TW: Suicide Mention, Self-Hate, Panic Attacks, Anxiety and Depression (brief mention of derealisation but I don't go into it)

A year ago, I would have never imagined playing this game! I had a very bad experience when I was 13 and this game was EVERYWHERE online. As to be honest, I was myself Suicidal at the time (and still struggle with Suicidal thoughts today)

And to be quite honest, I am not too keen on the base game still. I respect the reason others love it, but it triggers my derealisation and suicidal ideation quite easily. So low and behold when I met my to be girlfriend, Shiori! And wow she loved this game and I always had respect for it but wasn't ready for it to be discussed loads. Overtime, we've grown closer and closer the past 9 months (especially the 6 months we've been together) and I felt I wanted something to get closer to my partner and understand her better...

And I can happily say I do.

These side stories are some of the best writing of mental health I've seen since Celeste that it makes me wish this was what the game always was! I genuinely think of this totally differently to the original games' main story, to the point I feel they made this out of respect to those hurt by the popularity of the og game. My only gripe is that you HAVE to play the base game to get these, which my partner luckily already had unlocked

But back to the game in question! This game goes through chapters focused around 2 of the main 4 characters that ties into a theme linked with their mental health. This felt really needed and I love the characterisation of Sayori, Monika, Yuri and Natuski which was really needed. The smile on my face or even the amount of times it was too relatable hit extremely hard! Huge recommendation to experiencing this side story if you can

SPOILERS BEYOND THIS POINT:

This will be going into detail about each characters individually and showing spoiler art from the side stories!

Due to this, there will be a lot more mentions of the TW mentioned at the top so please keep that in mind, look after yourself first! Okay? Okay!

Sayori!

Sayori is the one I easily connected with the most, who is given such a lovely adorable personality that rubs off on everyone around her! When she first meets Monika during the clubs early days, she really helps with everything in the club and shows such enthusiasm and initiative. However, my favourite element of her is the "bad side" of her as she describes...

Sayori has depression, and also has to deal with Suicidal thoughts quite a lot. She hides this as she's afraid of how she will be treated by others and uses poems to represent these thoughts as she otherwise can't

For example:

Monika is the one to discover this (how she handles it I will get to with her section) and Sayori completely breaks in such a realistic way... and is finally able to just talk about her thoughts. How she feels like a burden worrying people, wanting to help others over helping herself, but... also dealing with thoughts she can't control, making her feel she doesn't deserve to be alive. That she should take herself away from the world, and that she would be better off gone...

I know this too well, as I've dealt with Suicidal thoughts myself, I still do. The position Sayori is was where I was a few years ago and I'm still early on to my recovery. I'm okay being honest about that here as to review the mental health I need to talk about my own 💙 Which Sayori's representation hits very close to home in a very realistic way, to the point that she portrays herself as happy and bubbly! Monika supports her so well here and gives Sayori what she needs and we see Sayori be the most vulnerable, completely empty expression and struggling with her mind. I was in tears at this scene because I felt like I finally understood something about myself!

But that's not all! She learns and grows so much in trying to support Yuri and then Natsuki later on. With Yuri, Sayori supports her a lot and we see Sayori really trying her best to help Yuri feel included and really sweetly comforts her and shows how kind and thoughtful Sayori is. With Natsuki she has to learn the opposite! Where she needs to give people space and once she realises, does everything she can to make it right and understand. It's really sweet how determined she is whilst also showing she isn't "better" after the first chapter as she still puts people before her. Even in a chapter not focused on her, she helps Natsuki understand Yuri by talking about how she struggles with her own head...

I love Sayori, she is my favourite and I really appreciate how she represents those with depression and suicidal thoughts well

Yuri!

Moving forward, I won't be as in depth as I have a lot to say on my personal experiences linked to Sayori, so I'll be more concise! Yuri is a very reserved yet passionate character who clearly struggles a lot around other people. She is shown to feel she's being selfish when she really isn't. She struggles interpreting other's feeling and is what I would call extremely Autistic coded! She has a massive breakdown over-worrying about bothering Sayori about her books only for Sayori to comfort her and for Yuri to explain how used to being considered "the weird one" which hit me close to home too. I only recently found the people that cared for what I loved!

There's also how she and Natsuki needs to connect, and Monika tries to help but Yuri feels like she keeps saying the wrong thing...

Monika supports her to help speak in her own way, as Yuri learns how to express herself differently due to her struggles with communication. It's really good as it doesn't have Yuri "fix" herself with how she struggles and instead find alternatives to manage better, which I really like!

I would get into the obvious "Self-Love" chapter, but that requires me to talk a lot about Natsuki, so I'll mention that in her section! Yuri is a really sweet personality that's also completely different from the og game and I find that for the better, as I think her writing was super problematic. She deserves the world and I loved her characterisation

Natsuki!

Going into this, I didn't expect to care at all for Natsuki! She always came off as bitchy or a very... certain anime trope beginning with L in the og game.

Here they surprised me as Natsuki is misjudged by Monika and how she overtime has to set boundaries whilst communicating them healthily with Monica, Sayori and then Yuri. I feel Sayori was important for her to begin learning how to communicate this as Sayori always wishes the best for her friends. But, we see how consistently made fun of Natsuki has been made fun of for her love of Manga

This leads me with what I left out in Yuri's section, the final standard side story "Self-Love". This shows the aftermath of Yuri trying to communicate better, and how Natsuki has been coming to terms with her previous friend group being extremely toxic for her as they don't understand or respect her needs. I heavily felt this story due to how I've been in this situation with friends/friend groups too many times. (if anyone of those people ever read this, no hate, just from my personal perspective and experience) Yuri and Natsuki chill together each lunch and grow closer, as we learn more about Natsuki's group and how Yuri dislikes how they treat her. At first Natsuki dislikes the comment but then realises how bad this group is for her. It scares her, going into how it's "just apart of my life" and how "its hard to just lose that". Eventually, Natsuki decides to cut them off, bringing cupcakes for Yuri as she feels it's the only thing she can do to prove her worth. After Yuri says she doesn't want all of them, Natsuki breaks down after admitting she split up with her group. It's a full on panic attack which I went through too in a similar situation. Yuri realises and all worry shuts off just so she can help Natsuki stabilise herself.

She makes it clear to Natsuki that she doesn't need to serve a purpose to prove her worth to others, and anyone that made you think that doesn't deserve you around. I had to breathe as I was reading this whilst I reflected on some things here, as this was a powerful moment that meant a lot to me, now more than ever. Natsuki was a lot more complexed than I thought firsthand, and represented panic attacks and lack of self worth so well

Monika!

Monika is weird for me, as she is similar to Yuri where she is nothing like the og game, except to an even more extreme. Monika is a lot more human and actually... a character?? See it's so weird to talk about her as I can't help but be baffled by how different it is to have this Monika!

That being said, I really like Monika here! She is super focused on making the club the best it can be, which she learns more about as she meets everyone. Sayori helps her learn about how this club can be help for those to understand their own emotions after supporting Sayori's depression. She fully understands and supports Sayori's needs after discovering a poem clearly hinting towards what Sayori goes through, and comforts her and tells her how much meaning to this world she has without worrying or treating her differently. This in turn also helps Monika grow out of her perfectionism to express her own feelings more over the course of the side stories. Then Natsuki helps her learn past her own biases and be a more considerate and understanding person, even pushing herself to learn the piano. Yuri helps Monika to learn she can't fix everything and has to learn to either step back or approach things differently to support everyone better!

She really cares about making a club for others to feel a place to belong in, and grows so much through the game as it recontextualises the one thing I liked about the og game: "Your Reality" This song, whilst originally meta, was so beautifully contextualised to mean more about one's own heart and using writing and expression to learn more about yourself through the good and the bad times.

"The ink flows down into the dark colours Just move your hand, write the way into your heart"

This side story was everything to me as I was able to spend time with my girlfriend... Thank you Shiori

#doki doki literature club #game review #review #doki doki literature club plus #sayori #monika #natsuki #yuri #ddlc #visual novel

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razorblade180 · 2 years

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I’ve Watched Ice Queendom

Shout out to family having a premium account.

I will not go super deep into it and spoil all the new parts. This is just a thoughts and opinions hot off the presses. The long and short of it is I’m interested and think people should stick with it for awhile. As for my longer thoughts and opinions…

I always knew this would get a buff because RWBY as a series has more to work with then they originally started with. I didn’t truly fathom what that could look like until it was right in front of me. Nobody who watches this should be trying to throw jabs at the original V1 because this has the amazing benefit of foresight essentially. I really liked how they started the episode because what they were able to do was take info, characters and events that were discussed after the fact or in flashbacks; then gave it to us now.

Never really thought about how we would’ve seen characters and context for certain fights in V1 if those things existed at that time. That was a treat for me. Especially when it comes to how Yang treats Ruby, and few things Weiss does.

In terms of how things look, (reminder, I’m not an animator or anything like that) there’s definitely a few shots that I thought made the characters look a bit strange but I do think this art style is pretty cool; it is funny though that you can immediately tell when they threw more money in sequences. Like someone over there has to be a huge Weiss fan because I lost it when she had to fight the grimm in class! It was never serious in the original!

People are definitely going to compare certain fights scenes to the original and I have mixed feelings on it. There’s absolutely moments in the original go harder than in this. However, I think people should keep in mind the original had episodes that were 8 minutes long. They had to go hard, or else the entire episode is not that cool. Icequeendom may make a fight not as intense, but there’s still 40 minutes left. They weren’t trying to make that the scene that gets you to wait for the next episode. They’ll show you something in 20 minutes.

I enjoy most of the reworking of encounters and transitions into the next big moment. There are a few though that I thought were w but abrupt, but then I think about the original and that’s either where an episode ended, or there wasn’t anything bridging two moments.

Slight spoilers, but a change I do like and that makes sense is there being no sleep scene before exams. They just put them all on the same airship to remake their meeting while the ship goes to exam, because why would they show up an entire day early and have to sleep at a school they haven’t even officially made it into yet?

Funny enough, they’ve definitely streamlined a fair amount of stuff well, but they still rushed. Even with some content. It sets up character mindsets and a bit of lore RWBY fans will be aware of, then kinda moves along. This show has the air of it expects the majority of the viewers to be from original RWBY so I guess they didn’t see the point on trying too hard to see certain character bonds. It was a bit disappointing but not irrelevant by any means.

They maintained Weiss being rude and racist, yet somehow made her less insufferable. There’s not as much“ha I’m rich” energy, but still “Faunus are trash and here are my bias yet valid reason to hate them.” I didn’t know that was possible. So far I do like how they are treating and representing the characters. Even Jaune doesn’t come off as desperate or a clown.

Last Act- Spoilers.

The last act made me disappointed. First of all, Penny is creepy. Second, they cut the entire harbor fight. I can’t imagine why! They took Sun and Blake’s best fight away. My only reasoning why that might be is we are now really going to diverge from what we know. A few earlier scenes got shortened but it made sense for reasons I said earlier about episode time; but this was really shocking. I’m even willing to bet we won’t see Sun that much when new things start rolling. Can’t see why you wouldn’t show him off now otherwise.

The very ending though saves it for me though because it seems like unlike the original, they are not going to act like Weiss is a cooperative person like dropping bias and resentment is easy.

Summary

I pretty much said it already. I’m interested and think people should stick with it for awhile. I have a feeling it diverges the higher peoples’ opinion will be because then they aren’t cutting anything. Pacing might be a problem but it’ll be less noticeable. Also let’s be honest. Pacing problems have been a struggle from day 1 of RWBY.

7.5/10

Side note

Seeing Adam in 2D was the only character that made me think “You we’re always made to be like this, but you were trapped in 3D art.” It felt so natural seeing him like this. Also, this is now the second continuity where Blake leaves and he’s like “Eh, I’m stressed about it. We got things to do.” It really pushes the idea him being obsessed and unhinged later was definitely not their original destination for the character. Being a radical and racist is all the evil needed.

Everything about that new character down to their weapon reminds me of a hunter, but not from Remnant. From HunterxHunter. It’s kinda insane but cool I guess.

#rwby #rwby ice queendom #rwby spoilers #rwby ice queendom spoilers #rwby review

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16woodsequ · 1 year

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started doing the thing where i crave attention for my writing and want it to get instagram famous or something, like an agsty comic. any tips on how to get out of this mindset? - ur friend pwetzl

I've been thinking a lot about this ask.

First I want to say it's very normal to enjoy the attention creating gets you! For example, I get a burst of happiness every time I get an ask or a comment on AO3. That is super fun and of course your brain wants more.

The only problem is when you start feeling hurt or depressed when you don't get the response you want or are looking for. And over time you start needing a bigger 'fix' to fill your craving.

A few things I do to help keep myself happy where I'm at:

Self-talk. I do this continually when I'm posting a new fic or a new chapter. I remind myself not to compare my new fics to old fics or other people's fics. (Numbers are deceiving, remember that the length of time a fic has been up matters, of course your fic from five years ago has more hits.) I remind myself what realistic engagement expectations are for my work and fandom. I celebrate little wins like I would big wins. I remind myself that people have lives and plenty of valid reasons not to engage in exactly the way I crave... That sort of thing. Basically I'm keeping my brain in check so I'm less likely to get disappointed. Note: I do not put down my work or myself during this. I'm allowed to be excited and love my work!

Keep happiness reminders: I started doing this a few months ago, and I love it! Instead of clearing out my inbox in AO3 after I reply, I keep comments that especially touched me or made me happy. That way I can look back whenever I want and remind myself of the history of wonderful readers I have. It's easy for the brain to forget or minimize past achievements, so this is a really nice way to keep it with you. You can do this with other sites by screenshotting your favourite responses or emails.

Re-read your work: Look back on old creations, art or fic or otherwise! Remind yourself why you love it, look at past comments or other engagement. Remember that part of the reason you wanted to make it was simply to share an idea, not just to get famous. Everyone who has seen your work now knows about that idea, even if there isn't many comments.

Appreciate the kudos: If you're on AO3, really learn to appreciate the kudos. Every morning that I get the kudos email, I take some time to read both the username that gave the kudos and the fic that got it. This is a really nice way to notice people or patterns you might otherwise miss at a glance.

Join a group: Join a smaller group like a Discord or chat that discusses your favourite thing. Here you can engage directly with the people around you and you can share your thoughts to people you know love what you love. It's a great way to feel more engaged with fandom community without getting lost in the vastness of it.

Turn off stats: This is primarily for AO3, but if you find you are unhealthily fixating on your hits and other stats, you can go into your settings and hide your own and others. Doing this might give your brain a break and give you a chance to retrain those happy thoughts!

I really hope this gave you some ideas. Remember to be patient with yourself. It takes time to re-train the brain!

#pwetzl #anon #ask #fanfic #advice #fanfiction

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charlieschapters · 5 days

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Aries Moross

Aries Moross' art and an interview where they discuss language, gender expression and the act of changing your name in an interview with It's Nice That

"I used to say a name is just a sound, but I know that is an understatement. A name is a sound, but it is often also a brand, especially in the creative industries. It can be your income. It is how you are remembered. It is how people understand who you are and it can also be how you create space for yourself to be seen.

I came out as trans and non-binary a few years ago. I changed my pronouns shortly after to they/them. It took a while to get used to those. At first, hearing they/them being said made me feel uncomfortable but I later realised that it wasn’t the pronouns that made me feel this way, I was picking up on the discomfort of others. Their mistakes and missed corrections felt heavy in the air. I’ve tried to describe this feeling to people – the best I can do is, it feels like you are asking them to compliment you. Like you are asking them for labour they didn’t sign up for. When they mess up and don’t correct themselves it feels like something has broken between you and them. But amazingly when they do correct themselves, it makes up for it tenfold.

In the workplace, it has only been in the last eight months or so I have found clients making more of an effort to get things right. If they have made an error they email after, or correct it on the spot. On some calls, people have even asked for pronouns when we start a project. All brilliant progress. Has having pronouns in my video call screen name helped? Maybe more people have also learned about pronouns from some Instagram swipeable – a format that has become more and more popular over the last year or so. Either way, when a client has used my pronouns I have felt euphoric, it is a sign that things are changing. It is also a sign to not work with people who don’t try. Perhaps it was this progress that has made me feel like it was time to change my name."

Moross, Aries. “Moross Who? Aries Moross on the Challenges and Rewards of Changing Your Name.” Www.itsnicethat.com, 29 July 2021, www.itsnicethat.com/articles/aries-moross-opinion-creative-industry-290721.

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hergan416 · 1 year

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Chapter 7 - What Does Art Say About the Artist?

Chapter 7 is where Dorian Gray gets Basil to not look at the painting by pretending that he saw Basil's secret in the painting instead of his own.

It's a stroke of luck, but also one that results in Basil confessing to Dorian Gray.

In the manuscript I'm reading, this confession is at its most explicit. It's gorgeous, and I could feel Basil's feelings in it. Just really gorgeous prose.

But what I find most interesting is not the confession itself. It's this bit afterwards.

"Well, after a few days, the portrait left my studio, and as soon as I had got rid of the intolerable fascination of its presence, it seemed to me that I had been foolish in imagining that I had said anything in it, more than that you were extremely good-looking and that I could paint. Even now I cannot help feeling that it is a mistake to think that the passion one feels in creation is ever really shown in the work one creates. Art is more abstract than we fancy. Form and colour tell us form and colour, that is all. It often seems to me that art conceals the artist far more completely than it ever reveals him."

Basil stops looking at his painting and where his first instinct was "God I love Dorian Gray and anyone looking at this painting will know as soon as they look at it," to "must have been imagining it. Art is just art after all."

It's a really interesting discussion. What does art say about the artist? Does it reveal him? Or not?

The people trying Oscar Wilde for gross indecency certainly thought that the story indicted him for the crime. I'm not an artist, and I don't study art, so I can't necessarily relate to Basil (or Wilde) on that subject, but I do write.

I can't say I'm on par with Wilde or any other published author, certainly not a published author worthy of being taught in schools. And certainly, as a fan writer I am more likely to write what I enjoy, regardless of form or artistic style, which is to say that I do very little to hide myself in my writing.

But even then, there is a dichotomy between "what you can tell about me as a person because of my writing" and "what you can tell about my literary preferences because of my writing." Am I writing about this because I know something on the topic? Or because I'm having fun thinking about what it would be like? Or because I enjoy the concept of dramatic irony, or character-driven story, or tragedy, or third person limited narration? How can you tell the difference?

Wilde is quoted as having said he that put too much of himself in The Picture of Dorian Gray. I feel like in this moment he is speaking through Basil Hallward. Over his life, Wilde's thesis on art could be boiled down to Théophile Gautier's (translated) phrase "art for art's sake." Wilde defended a position of total separation of art and artist, that art was it's own thing, entirely separate from the one who created it. The form of the art was all that mattered, not something such as authorial intent.

But here this is drawn into question by Basil, whose fears about being "found out" because of his art seem at this point in time to be founded in reality. Dorian Gray found out, didn't he? (Of course, the reader knows that's not true. Something entirely different is happening with the painting. This certainly supports Wilde's point.)

I think the reality is that both are true. The author cannot write and the painter cannot paint too far outside their own view of the world. But their view of the world is larger than themselves. The elements they employ are larger than those that touch their own lives. You cannot sever the art from the artist; there will always be their subconscious biases there, and these things will be especially apparent to the artist. But, the artist is not all there is to the finished art.

One of my favorite fanfiction authors often quotes Louise Rosenblat: "A story's just ink on a page until a reader comes along to give it life." Once you have stepped back from a work and let it be seen, the author isn't the only one engaging in the work. The reader, the viewer-- they bring their own biases and interpretations, and the creator doesn't have any control over that. At that point, the work is collaborative between the reader and the writer, the viewer and the artist.

I really like thinking about writing this way. It's bigger than any one person. As much as it might be a window into the author's soul, that window is so old that the glass has started to pile at the bottom of the pane, and the glass has greened, and so the view is distorted, and the reader has to make their own assumptions about what the things they are seeing mean. So, what they see might be the author's intent, or it might not be.

Reading Wilde over a century after the work was written, I bring my own set of biases and assumptions to my experience reading his writing that he could never have predicted. My experience with this writing is going to be different than the experience of his contemporaries who might better understand, for instance, the lexicon of double meanings and innuendos that might describe homosexuality in Victorian England. There's only so much annotations can do to express the meaning of these phrases. The reaction isn't visceral in the way it is when I read works from my contemporary writing community.

But I can empathize with this quandary. With wrestling with it. What does my art say about me? And where does it stop speaking? I can't say I know the answer.

#liveblogging the uncesnored picture of dorian gray #the book is due at the library tomorrow so uh #these might end #lol

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dazais-guardian-angel · 5 years

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A lot of thoughts about All Might, Izuku Midoriya, and My Hero Academia’s themes of empowerment and hope

So a few months ago I finally jumped on the infamous My Hero Academia bandwagon, and I’m finally getting around to talking about what it is about this series that has me so utterly captivated and emotional beyond belief, something I’ve wanted to discuss for a while now. MHA does a lot of things right, and at the same time, some things wrong, I can’t deny, (and man, I wish it didn’t do some of those things... alas), but there is one aspect of it in particular it (that expands into a few different things) that affects me more than anything else, that I wasn’t expecting at all when I first walked into it... something so special to me purely because of how so few other series focus on topics like these, and so beautifully and profoundly.

Below I’ll go into what I believe is MHA’s biggest strength, what makes it stand out from other shounen series, that resonates with me and so many others so deeply. This post is super long and rambling, with way too many pictures, and all of this has been said before by others, but hey, this is really damn important to me so I need to cry about it myself in-depth okay. Hopefully this all makes sense? lmao. Oh and lots of spoilers ahead.

It all has to do with our two main characters, and how they embody and exemplify more than anyone else the themes at the heart of the series:

First off, the main point: All Might is a disabled superhero.

I haven’t read/watched a ton, at least compared to many others, but I’m still confident in saying that, like other marginalized groups, finding disabled characters in media, main ones that are handled well, and don’t have their disabilities magically cured or made irrelevant somehow, is really fucking rare. And even in these cases, the disability is usually something such as blindness, deafness, muteness, an inability to walk, or lack of limbs. Which by no means am I saying that it isn’t important to represent those disabilities as well, far from it (I want more characters in wheelchairs, god dammit); I’m only saying that there’s even less chance of seeing more complicated disabilities, ones that might not be obvious from the outside, or on the flip side, ones that are very obvious on the outside (to the point that they might seem “unsightly”, disabilities that writers, especially in Hollywood, wouldn’t be eager to want to attempt properly, unfortunately), because of that.

All Might is arguably the secondary main character in the series, and he has a very specific set of issues due to the injury he received in the past: the blow to his torso meant they had to take out his stomach, much of his lungs were mangled and destroyed, and he had to have many successive surgeries just to get to a stable point, all of which left as emaciated as he is, and with a massive, ugly, bruised scar that caves inward like an impact crater, which looks like it hurts like hell. Losing his stomach means getting enough nutrition is virtually impossible for him (since he doesn’t have the time nor the discipline to eat as regularly as he needs to), making him even more dangerously skinny, and losing so much of his lungs wreaks havoc on his stamina and breathing, as well as causes him to cough blood on a regular basis.

...and All Might is the strongest superhero in the MHA universe, while still having all of these problems.

Now I won’t say that this is the absolute pinnacle of disability representation or anything, absolutely no way; All Might’s blood coughing is used for comedic effect, which I wish weren’t the case (though that happened the most near the beginning of the series; you don’t really see it anymore), and it would honestly be really nice if his disabilities were made more of a focus/point in the normal, mundane slice-of-life parts of the story, instead of just when the plot demands for it to be relevant, which so far has only been in the USJ arc, the Kamino Ward arc, and I suppose you could argue with the reveal of his death prophecy in chapter 131; it would be really amazing to see the other characters helping him when he needs it, and to see him using medical technology, even. Fanfiction is a blessing that I am eternally grateful for for doing this, but it’s not a replacement for canon. However, having said all that, it is incredible, something that I cannot even put into words how thankful I am, that Horikoshi has done even this much. All Might is not only the strongest of the strong, but he is simultaneously weak and sickly as well, he is both, and the best part of this is that when his “weak” side is revealed to Izuku, and later on everyone else, no one considers that part of him “lesser” or “inferior”: he is still strong, he is still “All Might”, to them, no matter what he looks like, and no matter what he can do.

In essence, having this in a Superman character is genius, because heroes are meant to be inspirations, beacons of hope, people who the characters, and the audience, watch, and are able to think “I can be strong and do good like them, too”, and one of MHA’s main themes is that heroes are heroes ultimately not because of what physical strength they possess, but because of their hearts... so how reassuring, how inspiring, how perfect is it for the top hero to actually be so ordinary, so human, underneath all the bravado and physical strength? Someone who is not some godlike entity on another level entirely, impossible to reach, but simply someone as normal as anyone else, filled with nothing but kindness and an entirely selfless earnestness to help the world, who worked as hard as he could to reach where he did, even despite all odds, despite everything he endured... someone that almost anyone can relate to, and feel like they can become. That is why everyone continues to love All Might no matter what he looks like and what he can or cannot do, and to have someone with so many physical disabilities be so beloved and considered so strong in the story?

That is powerful. That is the kind of character so many more stories need, who, again, people like myself can relate to, both in feelings of weakness and frailty and insecurity, but also in feelings of inner (and outer) strength and motivation and confidence, too. All Might is disabled: that’s just a fact of him, he is never going to ever recover any more, and no one faults him for his disabilities or treats him differently or delicately for it, except for Aizawa a couple times (out of concern). And I love him for it, because I can see my disabilities in him, I can easily picture him going through so many of the hells I’ve been through throughout my life, and god I’m just so emotional to have All Might. I was sobbing during the Kamino Ward All for One fight, seeing All Might be allowed to fight and WIN in his non-powered up, weak form, seeing everyone cheering him on because they held unwavering faith in him no matter what he looked like, to the very end. You never truly understand how important representation is until you are given some, finally. Could there be more to it? Yes, absolutely, and I wish there was. But it’s so wonderful to have a character like this at all, who is an endless sandbox of headcanons and art and fics, all of which are very likely based on what canon does tell us about All Might. It’s just... so nice to simply have a character like him there, shown positively. Thank you, Horikoshi.

However, it goes beyond just All Might; there is the other half of this representation (and relationship), as well:

In MHA’s universe, being quirkless is likened to having a disability; only 20% of the population do not have quirks, and being in that percent is considered strange, a tier below so-called “normal” people, and something to pity and sympathize, if the adults and kids around Izuku in his middle school years are any indication. It’s bad enough knowing that actual disabilities are often treated this way (All Might doesn’t want anyone to see his true body, out of shame, guilt, and fear that people will worry about his ability to continue helping them, even though he is the most beloved and strongest hero of all time, and proves for six entire years with these injuries that he can still work!), but the fact that this then happens to people without inhuman superpowers, something that no one had and wasn’t at all a part of society and everyday life generations ago, that not being cool (basically) will get you looked down upon too, is awful to think about. But that’s the situation Izuku is put in, and it’s because of this specifically that All Might has such an incredible impact on him: that is, not just because of what he does for him, and how he starts off admiring him from a young age, but also because of All Might himself (I’ll get to this).

Izuku admires and tries to emulate All Might as a child, dreams of becoming him when he gets older, just like any kid would; like many children probably did with All Might. But once he’s told that he won’t develop a quirk, clinging to that dream, clinging to All Might, becomes even more fervent and desperate and necessary and important, no matter how impossibly out of reach now All Might’s level may seem, no matter how foolish it is and how deep in denial he goes, because believing that he can become as great a hero as him, believing his heartfelt and motivational words and actions on TV, is all Izuku has to keep his spirits up, to still have any hope. Everyone around him loses faith in him ever becoming someone great, becoming as strong as others with powerful quirks will become, even someone with a pointless quirk means more in society’s eyes than someone like Izuku (ableist much??? ugh) but Izuku continues trying to shoot for his dream, though he has no idea how besides researching other quirks, refuses to give up on himself, despite the pitying, despite the constant, horrendous bullying (bullying that is, again, essentially the way a disabled person would be bullied for having a disability. Think about that. why is Bakugou painted as so forgivable in the narrative again), and I really do believe All Might’s existence for all those years before he met him was the only real reason for that. Izuku is stubborn, but it’s clear at the beginning of the series how badly everything has affected his confidence and self-esteem... if he had never met All Might, it haunts me to think about when Bakugou’s suicidal taunts might have finally pushed him over the edge, possibly literally.

But then, he does meet his hero. And who is it that he finds?

A depressed, broken, and unhealthy man, the complete opposite from the person he had known and looked up to and clung to all his life, who tells him that his heroic smile is no longer real, but rather a mask, and that Izuku should face reality: he can’t become a hero without a quirk.

Now, initially, of course, this utterly devastates Izuku, and one can’t blame him. He reacts exactly as All Might believes anyone would act if they saw his true form, true self, and then his hero rolls with the unpleasant mood and makes it worse, and deals the killing blow and shoots down his eternal dream, the scraps of hopes he’d been clinging to. And hearing it from the man himself, someone who is literally in the same situation Izuku is in, essentially, forces him to give up entirely, because if All Might says he can’t do it, then that’s the end of it, isn’t it? No more lying to himself, after this... not after his hero has basically just told him that everything he projects to everyone is a lie. All Might is the best of the best, and yet, still, he ended up like this, so how on Earth can Izuku think he can do even a FRACTION of what the number one hero has done, with no power at all, and come out of it alive??

All Might is depressed, and weak, and powerless (despite having so much power), just like Izuku is, but he has no inspiring words of comfort about pushing past boundaries or defying odds and expectations, because he doesn’t see himself as anything inspiring, anyone to shoot for, not like he is, doesn’t want anyone emulating him and getting themselves hurt like he is, and he’s not going to be cruel to someone and tell them that they can do things they won’t be able to just to make them feel better; he knows the harsh reality better than anyone. He doesn’t intend to hurt Izuku on purpose, he’s only trying to keep him from doing something reckless that will get him hurt (oh the irony, minutes later), and in his depression and self-loathing and guilt, he’s forgotten how he originally felt when he wanted to become a hero, way back when, the same way Izuku feels... he has lost all hope himself, so of course he has none to give to Izuku, someone sitting squarely in his similar, currently-hopeless position.

In short, all of Izuku’s insecurities and fears are confirmed by that first encounter, which is like looking into a mirror, (and, again, that is heartbreaking, for that to happen with All Might, of all people) and at that point, he’s ready to give up.

But then, the sludge attack happens soon after, and everything changes completely when they meet again.

My Hero Academia’s most beautiful and unique quality to me is how overwhelmingly hopeful and uplifting it is, the message it carries of realizing that you can achieve your dreams, in some way, in some form, no matter how out of reach they may seem and no matter how insignificant and lost you may feel; it is so positive and moving, heartfelt and sincere, wholesome, in everything that happens in it, even when “bad” things happen, compared to many animanga nowadays that steep themselves in darkness and depression (not to say they’re not good, of course I love many of them, but it’s still true), and that’s why it’s so incredibly refreshing and so beloved, I think, despite how very simple the story is. And all of that starts right here, in this scene where Izuku is first told that he can become a hero, that is probably one of the most iconic scenes in the entire series, if not the most iconic.

People like Izuku need to be given hope, encouragement, to know that they’re believed in, that there can be opportunities out there for them; on a most basic level, they need to be treated with normalcy and positivity, just like anyone else would be treated. Lying and giving false hope to unreasonable levels isn’t right, but neither is wallowing in and validating the utter misery, sorrow, and hopelessness the person is feeling, which is exactly what Izuku’s mother does; she doesn’t mean to hurt him, she’s still a good mother, but ultimately she does, unfortunately (especially when added to the school bullying that no one makes any attempt to stop, least of all Izuku himself, his self-esteem as low as it is). At the end of this scene, All Might offers to give Izuku his quirk, and the thing is that you can definitely say this is, in essence, Izuku’s disability being done away with, and I’m not going to say you’re wrong; I, too, was initially disappointed, because I had hoped that this was going to be a story of Izuku becoming a hero without a quirk, cliche as it might be (ideally with the support gear introduced later in the series that I didn’t yet know existed). What makes it more tolerable, though, is knowing that he doesn’t end up recieving One For All for a very long time after this, and even when he DOES get it, he has to work so, painstakingly hard to fine-tune it over the course of the series (reaching only All Might’s level will take him years, I imagine), harder than anyone else who had a quirk from an early age, to even reach a state where he can use it without breaking his body. But getting back to the point I’m trying to make: the focus of this scene is not on Izuku being offered a quirk (because, again, it hasn’t happened yet), but rather simply on the words All Might says to him. In this very moment, what impacts Izuku so strongly is being told that he can become a hero.

Simply those five words. That is all Izuku wants, what he needs more than any actual power itself. What he has been wanting someone to tell him for years upon years, to simply believe in him.

And this is where I’m extrapolating some, but I think that All Might’s condition/situation also has a hand in causing Izuku to react so emotionally to this: previously, All Might’s secret was devastating to him, coupled with his hero rejecting his hopes and exposing nothing but a bleak, harsh reality to him, with no hesitation at all, but here, when All Might completely turns around, inspired by Izuku’s actions and remembering that strength does not make the hero, but heart (”remembers his origins”, as it were), and finally tells him what he’s been craving from someone for so long, it is so much more powerful that it’s coming from All Might in his normal, human, sickly body, and not the heroic one everyone else sees. The “heroic” form of All Might might give off more confidence (especially in his own mind), but that is also the version of him that seems so much more impossible to reach, that seems so untouchable and as far away from the current Izuku as a hero can get, and not to mention is the version of All Might that is “fake”, that he doesn’t consider truly him, and able to convey his most genuine feelings; instead, All Might chooses to give Izuku his offer not as the beautiful hero the boy has idolized all his life (that, to him, is the only version of him he’d recognize, and like, especially since his normal form is the one that, just hours ago, told Izuku to give up), but as himself, as Toshinori, in all his weak, flawed, normal humanity, and it speaks volumes that Izuku is still so incredibly moved, so happy, to hear these words from this All Might that is so different from the one he’s always known. To other kids who have quirks already, powerful or not, they can easily look to the All Might that the world sees and be inspired by him (see: Bakugou), just like Izuku did all his life, be inspired by the power of that All Might, but this new All Might becomes infinitely more relatable to Izuku, just like a child in a hospital, who can look at Toshinori’s character (heart) and body instead, that is so strong despite being so frail at the same time, and can think “If he can do everything he does like he is, then maybe even I can, too.” And what makes it even more poignant to me is knowing that, ultimately, Toshinori essentially tells Izuku what he himself has been wanting someone to reassure him of for the past five years, too; he not only sees the younger, quirkless him in the boy, but also sees the him of now, who has been losing hope and confidence rapidly under crippling weakness for years, and hasn’t had anyone to convince him that he still matters and can do good for the world.

There’s a post I’ve seen that talks about the advice “never meet your heroes, because they’re sure to disappoint you” and how this ends up being subverted when Izuku meets All Might, and it’s absolutely true. What’s so beautiful is that meeting All Might, and seeing all of his many, many flaws, actually causes him to admire him more instead of less. Everything that Toshinori despises about himself, feels guilty over, are what leads to Izuku having an even greater amount of respect for him than ever before, knowing the human side of him, the person beneath the hero; his strength despite his physical ailments is already something Izuku is moved by, but then later finding out that All Might, too, started out quirkless, just like him, causes him to feel even closer to him, and more hopeful that he can become a great hero. He no longer remains simply a fanboy of All Might, but rather, someone who intimately cares about him as a human, as his savior, as his teacher, as his father figure, and finds so much in common with him. The “buff” All Might is everyone else’s All Might, but Toshinori is Izuku’s All Might, the person who told him he could become a hero, the person who shared his heroic spirit and dreams and lack of a quirk as a kid just like him, the person who is reckless just like him, and caring and strong (yet weak) and everything Izuku is and aspires to be. Izuku knows for the entire period All Might is still able to use One For All that his time is running out, that his era is rapidly coming to an end -- and he does cry when that end finally comes, mourns for the ending of the greatest hero he has ever known and the person he looks up to more than anyone else in the world, but even when that happens, his respect and admiration for All Might still does not waver one bit. Even when he can’t fight anymore, Izuku forever considers him All Might, and he’ll never stop doing so: from the moment he tells him he can become a hero, “All Might” and “Toshinori” blend together to him, and becomes someone he eternally loves and respects all the stronger, someone he wants to make proud, someone who he never wants to stop teaching him, and being there for him. All Might starts off as a vague, figurehead idol to Izuku, an image of someone that he loves from far away, and comes to him and becomes a person, and Izuku grows to love that normal, ordinary person more than he loves any other hero. It is the best and most touching version of a “meeting your hero” story that I can think of, where their flaws are embraced, and shown positively, and empowered, adding to their best qualities instead of taking anything away.

And Izuku’s love for Toshinori is, quite literally, saving his life.

As I alluded to, after sustaining his injuries, it’s clear that Toshinori falls into a deep depression, and changes vastly from the person he was when he first started out and for most of his career. After Nana is killed by All For One, he momentarily loses himself to anger and acts selfishly over the selfless duties of a hero, and tries to murder AFO out of revenge, and nearly dies as a result. Besides the obvious ensuing terrible trauma and ptsd he would have had to deal with, and an excruciatingly long recovery period (with probably many relapses), on top of his continued grief over losing his master, not being able to work nearly as much as he could before is absolutely devastating to Toshinori. Being All Might, helping people, saving people, being a hero is what he considers his only real value, which is why he desperately and recklessly continues pushing himself to keep working for however many hours he can, even if it hurts his body, even if his “All Might” smile and jovial personality turns fake and becomes a facade only for the peoples’ sake, not something he genuinely feels anymore, because to Toshinori, if he can’t be the number one hero anymore, he is nothing.

Toshinori has never been in it for the fame or glory; from day 1, from the moment he told Nana about his idea of becoming a “symbol” for people to rely on to keep their world safe for them, so they don’t let their fear lead them into crime, he has always been incredibly humble about everything he does, and extremely self-sacrificial. Of course, a hero needs to be selfless, at least to a degree (Ochako might be doing it for personal gain, but her desire to help people is still 100% genuine, for example), but after the major turning point is his life is when Toshinori begins to take it too far. When he goes after All For One is the sole time that he loses sight of how a hero is supposed to act, and he is punished severely for it, and continues to punish himself in order to make up for his mistake and do what he believes is his necessary duty, having completely forgotten how it felt to want to be a hero, for himself, for his own dream. Being the Symbol of Peace no longer is something Toshinori feels truly passionate about, like he did in the past, but now something he does on autopilot, something that he feels like he has to continue doing just because he’s already done it for so long, been so famous and so relied on for so long, even though it’s utterly exhausting for him, exhausting on his body and exhausting on his mental state, to keep up his normal upbeat personality that everyone knows and loves, but he continues on because not being able to continue serving the people is worse than literally anything else to Toshinori. He doesn’t have anyone there to prove to him that he has value as a person, not just as a hero, let alone to tell him that it’s okay for him to finally stop and rest. As far as we know, it seems like Gran Torino and Naomasa didn’t try to dissuade him much, and though Nighteye tries, rather violently, his approach isn’t the kind that’s convincing to him, and unfortunately his revelation that Toshinori will die in five or six years if he continues working as a hero seems to backfire, and instead makes him want to continue working more instead of less; he most likely believes that he won’t be around much longer, anyway, with the state of his health, so he’s convinced that he needs to do as much as possible before accepting the inevitable end. And then, Nighteye leaves him, so Naomasa is essentially the only person to support him Toshinori has left (seriously, Nighteye, I know you care; come on!).

But this is why meeting Izuku is so important for Toshinori, as much as it is for Izuku; everything changes for him when he does. At first, all he sees in Izuku is another fanboy, trying to chase a dream that Toshinori knows very well is completely unattainable for him without any power, because of how he can do nothing, is nothing, when he runs over his time limit and can’t use his quirk anymore, and he tries to shut him down as reasonably as possible, even admitting how unfair it is (because everything about himself is unfair now, to him); he knows how he must look to a fan of his, and hates it, and doesn’t have the energy to give him any small amount of hope or comfort, because he hasn’t known what it’s like to have hope in years, so he cannot give out any in return, when to him, now, being a hero is only something that will get you hurt, get you guilt-ridden, and, for someone like Izuku, get you killed. ...But it’s when he sees Izuku in action, sees his pure, unadulterated, selfless desire to help (however foolishly), it’s like a light turns on in his mind again, because actions always speak louder than words, and Toshinori is finally, truly reminded of that feeling, that innate, original, burning desire to be a hero that he had had when he was Izuku’s age, and also quirkless, and Izuku’s passion ignites his own passion once more, after so long, and lets him see the light and inspires him to act.

And because Izuku moves him, awakens something inside him again, like this, he chooses him to be the next One For All inheritor, partly because, as I said, he sees his younger self in him, but also I think because he understands exactly how hopeless Izuku feels, and wants to do something to change that, since he can (since he believes Izuku is worthy); his own dreams have been long since crushed out of helplessness, he doesn’t want this child’s to be too, when he himself got a chance from Nana when he was just like Izuku, back then. The thing is, at first, despite the spark that Izuku initially ignited in Toshinori, he still believes that he is going to be ready to die when the fated time comes, however it may happen; he starts teaching at UA, but knows that his time with One For All is running out, and believes that once it does, or once he dies, whichever comes first, that will be the end of things, and he won’t regret it. He knows he is not a good teacher, not knowing how to help Izuku train One For All so that he doesn’t hurt himself, and he initially believes that it is simply good enough that he managed to pass on his legendary quirk before he died, the one true urgent thing he’d been worried about since he became injured.

But then, over time, Izuku starts changing him.

Slowly, without even realizing it, Toshinori is affected by Izuku’s presence, his admiration for him, his care for him even when he’s in his normal, “inferior” state. He begins to be reminded again, truly, of what it means to be a hero, why he does what he does, why he loved it, and grows to again find value, importance, confidence, in the ideals he created for himself all those years ago, that his master encouraged him to stick to, again, and shows pride in them again, despite his “shameful” and “weak” appearance. The battle at Kamino Ward is truly the turning point for Toshinori, because he goes into it believing that his prophesied death will occur there, while taking down the person who took everything from him in the process, but it’s during that battle that he suddenly truly realizes not only what I said above, but also that it’s not enough anymore for him to simply win here, it’s not enough anymore for Izuku to solely have One For All on his own: now, All Might wants to live. He wants to live for Izuku’s sake, to be there for him and support him and care for him, and for his own sake as well, because Izuku has become more than just his successor to him. He wants to live, wants to defy his fate, he refuses to die, and tells his sworn enemy as much, multiple times, has a true will to live that Toshinori has not felt so strongly ever since his injury, and it’s thanks to his students, his fellow teachers, but more than anything else, Izuku. Because Izuku never takes advantage of him, never takes him for granted, never scorns him, never makes him feel as weak as Toshinori always felt; Izuku looks at him as if he’s the sun in the sky, he respects him, trusts and wants his guidance, he loves him, and in the same way that Toshinori empowered him on that day by telling him he could become a hero, Izuku gives strength to him right back, every single day, simply by being with him, and letting him know how much he needs him, how much he can do for him.

yeah I just wanted an excuse to put these panels cause they fucking kill me bye Just as much as Toshinori no longer wants to accept death, is determined to fight against it, Izuku is determined to stand by his side and make sure he succeeds in that, by helping him and protecting him however he can. No matter how many years pass, and how much stronger Izuku becomes, and how much weaker and more “unneeded” for his training and guidance Toshinori becomes, Izuku will never, ever, ever give up on him, or stop wanting him and believing in him. It is for Izuku’s sake that Toshinori has come as far as he has, not just mentally and emotionally, but even physically: he’s making a conscious effort to wear clothes that fit him now (obviously, now he can, without his quirk, but I think it says something that he’s made the change at all, since he doesn’t have to if he doesn’t wish to), and he’s trying to get in shape as much as is possible for him; anything he can do to extend his lifespan even a little bit more, for Izuku, something he didn’t care about at all before meeting him.

And of course he doesn’t want to simply live; he tries to make a conscious effort to become a better teacher, that Izuku desperately needs, even though Toshinori knows he’s not good at it. He realizes how important it is that Izuku stop injuring himself, stop being so recklessly heroic, lest he get himself into a deadly situation just like he did six years ago (something that Toshinori had to have thought about initially, when he first turned Izuku down that day, but since became ignorant of after giving him One For All and not knowing at all how to handle the teaching/mentoring side of things), and implores Izuku’s mother to let him continue teaching him and helping him become a hero, not only because of how deeply he’s come to care about the boy, but because of how much he genuinely believes he can achieve his dream, and how much he wants to make sure things go right with him, after everything in his own life went so horribly, depressingly wrong. Wants to make sure that he doesn’t lose his precious mentor, his source of guidance, the way Toshinori did, doesn’t want him to have to struggle alone, wants to make sure he can have someone to share his feelings with, someone to lean on, so he never has to hide anything, someone he can get everything he needs from, because Toshinori, as the number one hero, has been through it all. Toshinori wants to pour his all into Izuku, protect him, raise him, lift him up, as his successor and who is basically like a son to him, after everything Izuku has given him in return, after he has done nothing but save him the entire time they’ve known each other.

And that’s ultimately the core of their relationship, in the end: two people who saved each other, are still saving each other, in the most poignant and moving of ways. Both of them acknowledge somehow that the other being there is what kept them going. For Toshinori, I most certainly believe Izuku is why he is still alive today, and I honestly believe the same for Izuku as well. Without All Might, Izuku would not have made it through the bullying, and the pitying, and the loneliness and despair, and without Toshinori, he wouldn’t have been blessed with the gift he’s been given, wouldn’t be able to being living out his dream and trying to achieve it, wouldn’t have found friends, best friends, people to talk to, happiness, encouragement, support, strength, and above all, a father figure who he adores almost as much as his mother. Without Izuku, Toshinori wouldn’t have been given someone to guide, and nurture, and protect and want to see grow, wouldn’t, I believe, have had the same relationships with the teachers and students at UA, wouldn’t have been given a family, a son, a reason after he lost One For All to keep getting himself out of bed every day and keep living. Izuku and All Might parallel each other in so many beautiful ways: both of them begin quirkless, but hopeful, with strong ideals, a desire to do good, and kind and earnest hearts, and eventually they lose their way, Izuku gradually and hesitantly, and All Might drastically, devastatingly, and messily, agonizingly and bleakly, though both of them retain their kindness despite their internal despair, and then they meet each other and... save each other, become each other’s world, give each other so much. They both look past what they consider to be their weaknesses, and see the beauty and potential in each other, and bring out the best in each other, make each other happy.

More than anything else, All Might must live to the end of the series. He must. At the beginning, he started off depressed, dying, and ready to die, but now he is hopeful, still weak, still disabled, still dying, in a way, but trying so damn hard to live, and he deserves it so much. His arc is all about him doing everything he can to make sure that happens; he “should” have died at Kamino Ward, if this were any other series, he would have, but he didn’t, because he knew Izuku needed him, just like he needs Izuku. I want him to live, I want him to age, and become old and grey, and to need more help and need technology to help him (give him a cane, give him a wheelchair, give him oxygen, give him everything), but still be alive, alive to see Izuku become a great hero just like he always knew he would be, alive to see him graduate and get married and have children, and see that for all his other students too. I want him to live, for himself, for Izuku, and for everyone in the audience who he touches, just like he does to me. I see myself in Izuku, in his emotional state and his insecurities and his tears and his uncertainty about what he can accomplish, and I see myself in All Might, in his body (so much of his body) and his pain and his frustration and his shame and his insecurities. Both of them represent what it feels like to be disabled, in different ways, literally and figuratively, and being shown that you still matter, that you’re still important and can do so much greatness, and are given the opportunity to do so, to go beyond.

That is why All Might and Izuku matter, why My Hero Academia’s hopeful, uplifting, and inspirational outlook matters. The two of them are each other’s heroes, not because of any grand spectacle, but because they made each other feel needed, important, and strong when no one else was there to give that to them, at their lowest points. That’s why they are, to me, one of the absolute best mentor/mentee relationships in anime and manga, ever.

All Might will always be there for Izuku in some shape or form... but please, Horikoshi, from the bottom of my heart, let him live. He’s still important, always will be. Don’t let him fade into irrelevance. Don’t let him die.

Izuku needs him. I do, too.

(and let him wear this outfit in canon, it’s so badass; look at those oxygen tanks! SO MUCH POTENTIAL)

“Between my inferior self, and the world that surrounds me, I form an image and try to grasp it, but it feels so far away.

That endlessly expanding sky held no clear destination, so I started to feel scared. But no matter how many times I stumbled, you were right there, smiling.”

- “Heroes” by Brian The Sun

“And when it gets too hard, and nothing seems to work, I think about the reason why you kept pushing forward. I’m meant to be the savior but you saved me instead, I tried to hold your hand but you just held me in the end.

But then what’s left for me? With no one else around, I’m stuck here with the guilt that I can’t be left alone now. But keep looking ahead because you know that you should, and don’t be sad it changed, because I’m happy that it could!

And when I feel like giving up and doubting myself, I think of every letdown, the pain that I felt. But the things that I have lost are now the weapons I wield, each one of them a flower that is always concealed.”

- “Long Hope Philia” by Masaki Suda

#personal posts #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #my hero academia spoilers #toshinori yagi #all might #izuku midoriya #meta #i've been wanting to write this for the LONGEST FUCKING TIME #ever since I finished the anime #and especially after having seen those few arts and discussions out there from people who relate to All Might on a personal level like I do #I see you all and I love you #you're all so valid #I held off writing this till I read the manga though and I'm glad I did #it's not the most eloquent of posts but here it is lmao #i fucking love these two with all of my goddamn heart and soul #they are the ultimate heroes #the ultimate mentor and student #the ultimate father and son #im constantly crying over them; they mean the WORLD to me #not just because of how much i DIIIIIIIIIIIE for found family and father/son relationships like this #but because of DISABILITY #REPRESENTATION #please let them get the happy ending they deserve #please let All Might get it #please horikoshi im literally begging you to end this right.... how you started it #Toshinori has fallen on the popularity poll and he needs to gET BACK THE FUCK UP THERE #HIS 👏 IMPORTANCE 👏 NEVER 👏 DIES #ALL MIGHT NEVER DIES

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screentones-webcomicresources · 2 years

Text

Marketing your Webcomic on Social Media

So! You’re starting a webcomic and want to share it on social media! Good idea! But how?

The ins and outs of every platform shift and change, nobody has surefire answers, and not all of them are going to be right for you. But some specifics to keep in mind as you approach social media as a webcomic creator can go a long way.

Before you start: Can they read your comic?

Before you get started on any platform - have at least one chapter ready to read. A cold launch on your very first page with 0 followers will probably not go anywhere fast, unless it's an AMAZING first page that explodes everyone's brains instantly, which is rare. It's really good to give people a mini-story to chew on.

On the other hand, it can also be cool to show the PROCESS of starting the webcomic, even before it launches. Heck, some people make accounts solely for their webcomic OCs, and then make the story later. It mostly depends on how much of the behind-the-scenes process you're comfortable with sharing right from the get go.

Where to Post

The biggest platforms that webcomic creators are using right now are Twitter, Instagram, Tumblr, TikTok, and deviantART (Facebook might still work for some folks as well, but we don’t have that experience.)

Talk about your comic on any or all of these places to begin with! But as time goes by, try and foster the ones that are most fun for you, and easiest for you to handle. You don't need to post everywhere all the time every day. If you're just on Twitter, great! If you're everywhere, great! It'll all depend on what you like and what you can personally handle.

Next, decide if you want to have your webcomic accounts be separate from your personal accounts. Some people open a whole other account on a site solely for comic news and updates - but not everyone does. Either way is valid!

How to get visibility:

There are many ways to start getting seen by others, so experiment with a lot of things!

Post in different formats depending on what each platform does best.

Show your process! People love sketches. People love seeing works in progress. People love seeing you film your screen and put it up on TikTok, like a window into your 'studio.' Embrace the messy stuff - not everything needs to be super polished!

Talk to people if you'd like to make connections. Genuine interest in their work and their process really does go a long way. That said, stick to appropriate spaces and don’t hound people who aren’t interested in talking to you!

Once you make some friends on these platforms - support them with fan art and comments and general good vibes! As always, your desire to make art or leave comments should come from a genuine place, but hey, if a fellow creator likes your art and shares it, that's already some visibility for your art style and your passion.

Reshare old content that you like after a while! People miss things all the time. If you like looking at a thing again, someone else might too. Share it again!

Also, don't let low engagement at the beginning get you down. It's not common for someone to come into a new platform and have everyone go OH MY GOSH, INSTANT FOLLOW on a massive scale. You have to be ok with very slow growth at first. Remember, you're connecting with only a few people at first, then those people will read your comic, tell a few friends, their friends will tell a few other friends, etc etc. The growth isn't always consistent, but it does get a little more exponential as time goes on, if you keep at it!

Events and discussions can also be an easy way to get visibility and make connections when you’re first starting out. Most of these apply to the art community in general, but you can totally include yourself if you're making a webcomic. Because your webcomic IS art! These sorts of activities include:

Art Share Threads - this applies both for regular art and for webcomics. Seek them out, especially on accounts with viewerships that mirror your own. Be smart about where you share (maybe don’t drop your fantasy comic in the middle of a cape comic thread) - but share as often as you're comfortable!

Weekly Comic Chats: These are events where creators can talk about the webcomic creation process. They basically cover everything, so if you're wearing a lot of hats for your webcomic, it's a good place to talk and to learn! The one that we all know best is @WebcomicChat on Twitter - follow it and check out their weekly discussions!

Participate in MEMES! Either redrawing existing ones, or hopping on the bandwagons of those that pop up - seemingly overnight! It's an easy way for a potential reader to be like "ok, the vibe of this meme is giving me the vibe of the comic," which is a great 'in' for getting someone started or invested. Have fun with them!

Collaborate with a group! Zines, group pictures, and other group events can be great as well. If you're making a "webring" of friends and creators, it's cool to see those comics consolidated somehow. See what you can organize! It's good to see people supporting each other - we like that, and we need more of it.

When to Post

Every social media site or app is going to have some sort of pattern for 'what time is best to post.' It's different for each one, and on some, it matters a ton, on others, it matters far less. Do some research into the peak hours of the service you're using. On Twitter, it's usually best to post around noon eastern time - when a lot of people are either just about to start work on the west coast, or just about to go to lunch on the east coast. It doesn't always apply, but there are absolutely DEAD ZONES during the day, where even the most beautiful posts go to die.

Hashtags

On Twitter, try to limit your hashtag usage - but using #webcomic or #webcomics can be helpful! On Instagram... go hog wild. On TikTok... you don't have unlimited hashtags, but you can still include a lot of them. In general - just look at what other similar creators are doing, and literally copy them on their hashtag use. Just do it. There's no shame. Steal the hashtags.

How to Behave on Social Media

How you put yourself out there not just as a comic, but as a person MAKING a comic should also be a big consideration in your approach. Ultimately, it'll come down to your comfort level, your personality, and how personal you want to be. A lot of it comes down to common sense - don't be a jerk to other people - but your mileage may vary on what kind of vibe you want to set.

While you can absolutely get an audience for being extremely opinionated and sassy (especially if your comic has strong messages), it definitely doesn't work for everyone and can often affect how people perceive your story. The best use of social media is always a genuine portrayal of your personality, but with a little dash of neutrality here and there, especially if you're using it for marketing.

Know how to control yourself and think before you post something controversial. We've absolutely seen people just completely lose it on main, and while that can be entertaining sometimes, in other cases, it can really blow things up in a way that can’t be undone and drain your energy and morale to deal with the aftermath. Having the control to be chill and professional in public and vent your spicy hot takes in private can be the difference between a great social media experience and a draining one.

Parasocial connections are also a common trap just starting out. It’s great to get the word out in appropriate spaces, but stick to talking to people who want to be talked to, and DON'T DM strangers just because they have large follower counts, or put other on your mailing list without their consent.

Self-Care

Social media presence takes time, patience, and energy. It’s a great tool to grow your audience and make important connections with your peers, but you’re also likely going to be making posts that never get seen in the process of navigating algorithms and finding the places both you and your audience like to hang out. Use it as a tool and not a judgment on your work. If you find it too consuming or unhealthy, use queueing/scheduling tools to give yourself space from each post or take breaks. No matter what, stay healthy.

#social media #webcomics #marketing

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banqdanfnfic · 3 years

Text

which, as they kiss, consume | jjk

you just wanted to get a tattoo from your boyfriend

pairing: tattoo artist!jk x reader

genre: established relationships au, tattoo artist au, smut

word count: 4k

warnings: unprotected sex, biting, making out, grinding, licking, nipple play, jk has a lip ring, oral (f receiving), fingering, shy jk and oc, sexual tension, slight choking, slight aftercare

♫ : Streets by Doja Cat, Candy by Doja Cat

♡ Aesthetics: Playlist | Moodboard

He visibly chokes on his glass of beer as he almost snaps his neck to meet your gaze. He could say that you were awfully drunk and hence the sudden confession out of the blue, but behind your heavy lidded eyes, Jungkook could sense that you were serious.

“You what?”, he gulps abruptly, moving closer to your face, doe eyes pleading to repeat yourself.

“Yes Kook. I want that tattoo on my breasts. I’ve decided”.

It’s not that Jungkook didn’t have experience in his career with inking on different parts of a human body. He just had never given a tattoo to someone who is romantically associated with him and the thought of seeing you half naked made him chuck down the rest of his drink in one go.

The most physical he had ever gotten with you was a kiss shared occasionally since it’s only been over two weeks you had started dating. Okay maybe you made out once in his car but that’s it. It never got to the point of shedding clothes or anything intense.

“Are you sure?”

You giggle at the sudden hoarseness in his voice and nod positive. Ironic how his aura never matched his personality. His inked skin, athletic body proportions covered in black monochrome bad boy outfits gave out default energy that he is a local heartthrob with multiple chicks wrapped around his finger each night and a heavy demeanor to carry in his smirk.

You were one of those believers until Jungkook asked you out in the most hopeless romantic way possible after constantly visiting the café you work in, a few shops besides his parlor. He was a gentleman with respectful boundaries, warm hands to hold yours and sweet sensual kisses though you are pretty sure he probably has a good game.

For any outsider it looked like those cliché bad boy and shy girl love stories, but for real both of you were a good percentage of introverts.

Jungkook runs his tongue around his lip ring while he is stressfully ruffling his dark locks into a mess. He is trying to explain his reasons to postpone your decision considering how shy he got at this point. But then that’s exactly why you were requesting him with soft eyes, it would be so uncomfortable to be shirtless in front of anybody else. Or maybe it’s your way of saying the relationship is open for higher levels of physical affection.

After debating around in vain, he finally hums and clears one of his slots for his beloved client.

Friday approaches way quicker than you assumed and now your heart is beating in your throat. Right after you are done cleaning the tables, you have to make it to Jungkook’s parlor for your appointment.

Running on three hours of sleep, black under eyes even after a decent amount of makeup, you groan as you check yourself out in the mirror. You opted for a simple shirt and skirt (also known as the outfit you bought for occasions with Jungkook), light beach waves resting on your shoulders. Hoping that a few cups of coffee will save you, you stride across the street to stop before the infamous parlor he worked in. Hopefully the full body shave and chocolate body butter has kept its excellence on your skin below the clothing.

The door chimes as it opens with a dragged creak on the musky wooden flooring. It felt like an otherworld where air smelled like men’s perfume and faint tint of cigarettes. In other words, intoxicating.

You ask the first person you meet at the reception, one of Jungkook’s companions at the shop and he assists you to his cabin located at a comfortably remote location.

His space is hidden with a simple black curtain. You are met with Jungkook’s back facing you, working determinately on a client’s arm and cares to spare a glance only when the guy with you is informing him about your presence.

“This will be over in a few”, he grins to your face and goes back to focusing his coil on the skin of a woman in her late twenties laying down his chair. The vibration from his inking machine fills in the silence and you excuse yourself to sit on a small black couch beside them.

This was the first time watching him at work and now you can understand why people rumored so much about his attitude because damn it is intimidating.

Brows knit together and inked muscles flex as he drags the needles around for finishing touches. Meanwhile you can pretty much smell the drool from the woman who is shamelessly checking out your boyfriend. Though you are pretty sure Jungkook gets such glances more than he can count every day, you can’t help but feel jealous. Partly because of the childish possessiveness and partly because you want to be the reason behind his dark eyes and intricate concentration, in profession or not.

To stop from mentally throwing daggers on the client’s way, you grab a random fashion magazine from the side table and flip through pages, though other four senses are inclined on your man. With a close attention to his low sigh you conclude that he is done.

The customer with now a fresh tattoo on her arm is discussing random useless topics to get him to talk, a very vain job realizing how Jungkook doesn’t bat a friendly lash at anybody, especially to those who hit on him. To be honest a large part of the ink business was linked with the obsession to attractive people who worked here, even if it meant trading an area of your skin. You grip the edges of the magazine a bit hard, not able to contain the sanity particularly at the high pitch voice she mumbles in before finally leaving his cabin.

A little excited and a lot nervous, you stand up as Jungkook bids goodbye to the third person.

He is quick to notice your discomfort, though not sure if it was the woman or the thought of finally getting the tattoo, he knew you were nervous and surviving in several cups of espresso by the dark circles slowly showing through the faded layers of your concealer. But nothing pulls down the opinion he has about you, beautiful and simple, no dramatics attached.

“Hey are you okay?”

You nod as soon as you sit down on the black tattoo chair, shifting a little to find a comfortable position. He is taking out a box full of equipment and fine needles, already making you break a sweat at the side of your forehead.

But more than that, it’s the way he is sharp and professional that catches your attention more.

You have never seen Jungkook this serious before. The choice of his vetiver perfume digging through your nostrils was driving you insane. If he doesn’t smile soon, you are going to melt into a puddle at his gaze.

“Are you nervous?”, he smirks this time, a newfound reason for your worsening gut health.

It’s mostly going in cycles at this point. Every bit of his skilled motion causes a vigorous hormonal reaction which initiates his next set of effortless teasing.

“I’m a little nervous”, you say, fiddling with your freshly painted nude nails.

“Me too”

It’s something you least expect to come out of his mouth observing how confident he looks right now. He basically has you cornered with his gaze. But whenever he had been truthful about his emotions it felt like a hug.

“I can take off my shirt too, so that we are even. Is that okay?”

He said it so softly like he is handling a child and the duality of the situation had your mind fogged and limbs frozen for a few minutes.

“Yeah it’s okay” It’s far beyond than okay. It’s great actually.

Jeon Jungkook is ripped, a Greek God sculptured masterpiece covered in self designed artwork you are more than happy to wake up to every morning. He hears you gulp at the feast before your eyes while he discards his black t-shirt to a nearby chair.

Now you don’t know if this whole thing is supposed to warm your heart or make you play several erotic fantasies like a movie before your eyes.

Both of you share a small smile while his long fingers are tugging at the hem of your shirt and pulling it up over your head.

He almost wishes you don’t opt to wear a bra but he is met with lacy black, a-bit-over your-usual-budget fabric hugging the roundness of your breasts.

It seemed like you were way too competitive about today. Anything less than complete awe from Jungkook for you was straight disappointment, you don't want anything less.

Well it seems like it did from how blown his pupils were at this point. He peels his gaze off your chest with a sharp gulp to look at your eyes suddenly devoid of any fear and staring back at him with all ease. He is filled with an exapnse of warmth and he isn't sure why does spending just a little amount of time with you had such a grip on him. He can’t wait to propose the idea of getting a couple tattoo together soon and as far as you know how Jungkook is, he is very serious with his body art so apparently he does trust you a lot already.

“Where exactly are you trying to get it?”, his voice is a lot deeper suddenly as he waits for your fingers to guide to his canvas.

You softly trace the spot at the upper circumference of your right boob, “Here”.

You suck a breath through your nose as his own fingers are mimicking your gesture, lightly pulling down the lace to inspect the fitting of the design at hand.

These violent delights have violent ends

And in their triumph die, like fire and powder

Jungkook traces each word on your burning skin, now leaning dangerously close which was questioning your control to put your palms flat on his pecs. He doesn’t notice that though, his mind is busy creating his own fantasies about the women under him.

After two minutes and twenty four second long of inspection and mutual thirst, Jungkook is selecting a bunch of needles to set into the rotary machine. Five fine sharp like a painter's brush moves in and out at a set regularity as Jungkook tests it out.

The next of his actions had you flushed into a pool of crimson. He gently lifts up your resting torso with one hand while the other is unclasping the hook of your bra, making you half naked for the sake of the tattoo.

"I'm going to start", he says shyly.

You still have time to save yourself from the growing phobia for the object, but another unlogical part of your brain says it's a piece of cake considering you have a whole distracting full course meal in front of you.

It stings at first. Well, okay it hurts like hell but your face is devoid of any indication, except your right hand is gripping on the rim of the chair for dear life.

Jungkook on the other hand had never felt this much diversion of mind during his work. He knows that you are probably hurting very badly, especially for a first timer. He is biting into his lip ring, trying to get this over with for the well-being of your pain and his hormones.

After he had scribed one word into your dermis, you are no longer able to contain the ache so you give out a small squeak out of your glossed lips and the vibration of the machine at his hands stops as he looks at you.

"You want me to stop? ", he is relaxing his face as he cups yours with one hand. You don't want to answer that question, but the drumroll of the current situation is making your heart flutter and everything about the little burn on your chest is forgotten.

"No. It does hurt but I'll be fine I guess", you whisper. His breath is mixing with yours slowly as he is leaning more towards your face. If it isn't for a kiss then you are likely to be disappointed.

"It'll be over before you know it. I'll make it quick", and then he kisses you, a small act to get off the pressure of sexual tension between your bare upper bodies.

Before you think of any tongue in the act, he is breaking off the contact and returns to his position on your chest. He misses the pout that forms on your mouth but right now both of your heads are in cloud nine.

The pain starts again, only this time you are busy reliving how his lips felt in yours; soft, firm and controlled.

You gasp when you feel one of his hands cupping your right breast to further his design but it's lowkey an act empowered by lust which is straining behind the so called professional eyes.

You just sit there flustered out of your mind and then Jungkook is suddenly squeezing, full palm hiding your breasts like it's a protected treasure, but he isn't showing the slightest facial expression other than determined eyes and his lower lip caught between his teeth.

Fuck you can't take it anymore. Jungkook can feel your nipples harden against his hand and his brain isn't helping much to concentrate on the design. But by the grace of some positive karma left on his side, he makes it through the long text and when he is letting go of your chest and standing tall, your skin is popping out with redness on the places the text lays embedded.

He fishes out a mirror for you to look.

"It looks beautiful thank you Jungkook", you smile.

"Can I give you one more tattoo on your left one?", he asks while you are contemplating whether going through the pain is worth it, not to mention you really want to get back at a private space with Jungkook as soon as possible.

"It won't hurt I promise", and then he is kissing you a lot filthier than before; all tongue and teeth, while his hands are grazing on the skin of your waist, pressing a little firmer than before.

The coldness of his lip ring rivaled around your mouth, and you try sucking on it to which Jungkook responds with a growl and pushes his body adamantly against yours.

Skin to skin, you are lost in euphoria of everything happening and finally, you roam your eager hands around his body, to his pecs and the definition of abs.

As your fingers scraped against his scalp, Jungkook is biting eagerly down your jawline to your collarbone and continues his ministrations at a particular spot which is bringing out melodic moan variation from you.

He is going down your skin, licking on your left boob before he starts planting violet tattoos as he had promised. As if it couldn't get better, he is massaging the right breast, in a way to soothe pain.

He loses it when you stutter his name, but he is just a fucking tease when it comes to making love and doing anything in a public space is the last thing he wants to do. There isn't much room for all that he wants right now.

"Why did you choose this particular tattoo Y/n?", he rasps while he is planting small pecks on his artwork, and you reply when he is finally eye level with you

"I just felt like it's a good one", your breaths are uneven and mostly caught in your neck. He pecks your lips before speaking, "Those are lines from Romeo and Juliet".

He takes your hands to trace over a line of text among the many designs on his chest.

which, as they kiss, consume

"We pretty much have a couple tattoo now Y/n", his breath is matched with your pace and you are not very sure how to respond to this new knowledge.

"That's… hot"

You break into giggles along with him, he just can't stop dragging his lips around your skin, but he isn't able to word his feelings right now either.

"I have some aftercare healing ointment for the tattoo at my place, wanna come over?" Now that may be a little lame of an excuse to get his little friend out of his pants but you are too unfazed to analyse any of that.

His hands find place on your ass under the skirt as soon as the door to his apartment closes, and before you know it, you are in his bedroom, sitting on the soft mattress and tongue lost devouring each other.

While eagerly getting rid of every article of clothing, Jungkook notices that you don't have your bra on beneath the shirt, so it's probably back at the parlour, but none of you have the slightest care for it, might as well make an excuse with it later to fuck you in his cabin.

He is pushing you farther towards the headboard, him on top, grinding sensenslesy while your lips mould with his. Though he has his whole body pressed against you, you can't seem to feel his weight at the slightest, every one of his actions were just balanced and perfect.

As Jungkook goes down on you, his smile is evident against your skin, finally able to find out how every one of those scenarios in his head will come to look like. He lets out a satisfied hum being finally able to suck on your tits, your fingers finding place on his hair, twisting it out of stimulation.

His pelvis is flushed harshly against yours, grinding and rubbing against your pussy for as long as he is rejoicing the feeling of moving his tongue around both the nipples.

He stops rubbing after some point and you whimper at the loss but his fingers are soon to meet your core as a quick apology. All your later moans are muffled on his mouth once again.

Feeling the controlled movements of his fingers on your clit, you dig your nails down on his toned shoulders. It's becoming impossible to reciprocate his lewd movements of tongue on your lips at this point as the excitement between your thighs is growing every passing second.

Your mouth remains slightly parted as he removes his face to watch you squirm underneath, lips swollen, deep red and glossy from all the saliva.

He pecks at the shell of your ear before going down past your navel.

You haven't had much heads in the twenty years of your life, most of the guys being completely against the idea which made you feel insecure to bring up the topic in bed, but Jungkook does it like his life depends on it.

He growls at the sight of you dripping into his sheets and he seems to enjoy the idea of being the influence behind it. But none is going through your head at the moment, not the metal on his lips grazing against your folds, or the fact that Jungkook is grinning each time you cry his name, it feels unreal to feel something like this.

His mouth is wrapping against your entrance and he is balancing your lower body on his palms to help him reach the right depths inside you. While all you can muster up is the strength to grope the bedsheets in your fist and close your eyes at the pleasure.

Jungkook brings his head higher to give some attention to the throbbing clit, catching it between his teeth and triggering the bundle of nerves just the perfect dose to have your hips jolting up to his face.

He can't take it himself when you are now whining and chasing for your release, so he is slightly humping against the bed to get some friction.

He licks a slow stripe up till your abdomen and slowly raises to your face, already fucked out and dishevelled to keep up with his dominant orbs.

He swears he had never felt so much warmth and care for sex with any of his previous partners, in relationship or not, all he could think is how good can he treat the pleading eyes underneath him.

"Is there something you like that you want me to do?", he says, fingers grazing once again to your crotch to not deny you from his contact. Only this time he is exploring the tightness of your pretty cunt with two skillful fingers.

Is there? You are not sure. Or in other words you are too caught up at the sense of him fingering you. It's not like you had enough experience or people who cared enough to ask that question. It astounds you that never in this entire foreplay he asked for any favor for himself.

"I'm not sure…", you whisper and then maybe you have something on your mind " um I guess I would like to be choked" Okay this felt embarrassing.

He smiles before sliding his free hand from your lips to your neck, and applies slight force, careful to not hurt you in the slightest bit.

"Is that fine?"

"Yeah", you muffle through the decreasing course of air.

He pulls up your face by the throat to attach lips once more. He just can't seem to get enough of kissing you senseless. Then, the tip of his long ignored cock is teasing the length of your pussy twice before it's stretching you out to the brim.

Bodies flushed and hot, his pace is deep and slow, making sure to kiss the cervix every time he is inside.

He watches as your eyes close shut and flutters around whenever he is grazing against your sweet spot. Both of your ears lost and eager for the moans looming out of each other, his more like what he sounds at the gym. Nice observation Y/n.

In this span of sexual energy you shared, you can make some obvious conclusions. Sex with him was surreal, both in terms of domination and the care he had. Rocking against him and keeping up with his hips was attainable— Compared to the intense eye contact he tries to hold, or the way he cups the side of your face and rubs the pad of his thumb on your cheeks while he kisses you during sinking back in, or the way his eyes glow at the beauty of your body open for him. It makes you feel special and it's difficult to respond to these gestures when you never felt this way before.

Jungkook could tell that from your face, but he hopes he lasts with you enough to help you know the worth you hold. You couldn't think too much about anything when you are busy squeezing around his length and coming twice in the first ten minutes.

By the third orgasm Jungkook is nearing his own and he pulls out to pump a few times before coming on your stomach.

"Was it okay?", his voice is all over the place, still balancing his body on his arms while you are amazed by his strength.

"It was amazing Jungkook", you smile. You have known a lot about Jungkook over the few dates you spent with him. That he likes literature, classics and philosophy, designs tattoos as a subconscious thing, that his game is A-1, and he likes working out almost three hours a day. Good for you. But it wasn't until now you know him to be gentle, like he is afraid to crush you under a feather touch. You don't know him as someone who is staring deep into your face after a good fuck, speaks nothing, smiles widely, and plants a peck on your forehead before getting off the bed.

He does the honors of cleaning both of your bodies with a towel, it's not like you have any strength left in you anyway. And then pulls out an ointment from the bedside table and plops next to your body.

"There. You need this to protect the tattoo", he takes off the nozzle and applies a required amount against the words on your chest and massages against them.

"Now go to sleep Juliet", he mocks, pulling up the sheets over you both "good night".

You snuggle against his hard chest, kissing his pecs before resting on it, "Good night Romeo".

thank you so much for reading!! please leave a feedback!!

★ taglist: @pjmochii (dm, ask or comment to enter the tl!)

★ credits: @/rainbeary on spotify : songs that'll make you feel everything's in slow motion playlist

★ banner & boards: by me :)

a/n: this is my first time writing smut and i basically died of second hand embarrassment during the process. pardon for my untalented ass, i tried this wip continuously for a week and i seriously don't think it could get anything better though it's probably not much.

1K notes · View notes

get-shiggy-with-it · 3 years

Text

Ch. 1

Shigaraki Birthday Week! MINORS DNI DO NOT PUT THIS ON TIKTOK

Pairing: Tomura Shigaraki x fem!reader

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: reader is marked fem cause Tomura is a little sexist and hates you cause you’re a woman, no pronouns, incel!shiggy, collage au/no quirks, tomura is an asshole, gratuitous swearing, like so much, shiggy has a dirty mouth, mentions of shigs being anxious, let me know if I’ve missed something

Ch. 1 | Ch. 2 | Ch. 3 | Ch. 4 | Ch. 5 | Ch. 6

Summary: Tomura gets stuck taking an English class to graduate and is partnered with you, a bitchy try hard (his words not mine) for his final project. But over the course of the semester he finds that while he hates everyone, he might hate you just a little...less.

AO3 mirror

The door at the back of the room creaked open and jarred Tomura from his half-sleep state. He didn’t look at who’d bothered to slip into this fucking class late, and instead tried to let the prof’s inane droning on Timothy Whoever The Fuck’s 18th weirdo letter book lull him into day dreaming.

He only made it about a quarter of the way back into his boredom induced coma until he was dragged unwillingly into wakefulness once more.

“Sorry, could you plug this in for me?”

Tomura jumped again when you leaned over to whisper to him, computer charger in one hand, gesturing to the outlet on the wall by his head. You’d left the typical courtesy seat empty between the two of you and he stared blankly at the way you leaned your weight on the vacant chair.

He recognized you.

The classic, dumbass teacher's pet who was always front and center of the room, iced drink at the ready looking like you belonged on the set of some god awful college b movie.

Well, almost always. You certainly had that loud ass drink, but you’d tucked yourself at the end of his row towards the back of the room and was clearly a bit embarrassed for bursting in almost 15 minutes late.

Tomura swallowed hard as your shirt gaped in the front. It took an immense amount of control to not gaze outright into the swell of your chest.

“You good?” you asked softly, head cocked like you were straight out of a fucking manga panel—tits on display with that stupid innocent, puzzled expression.

“Uh yeah, sorry,” Tomura mumbled.

You offered him this gross, clearly fake smile—because why the hell would you be grinning like that if it wasn’t just because you wanted something from him—as he threaded the cord behind his chair and plugged it in.

“Thanks,” you replied and turned back towards the professor, typing away cause you actually take notes in this class.

Of fucking course you did.

Probably trying to impress everyone with how you typed practically every word the prof said. Tomura decidedly did not take notes, and didn’t really pay that much attention in general. Usually he just played some trashy phone game under the desk or dozed with his head against the cement wall.

It had gotten to that portion of the semester when it was warmer outside but the buildings still had the heat cranked all the way up, especially here in the basement where the classroom was. That environment along with his usual hoodie/joggers combo created grade A napping conditions that Tomura took full advantage of.

As a rule, he actually cared about school and he did relatively well. But this was just some dumbass liberal arts requirement course that had nothing to do with his actual major, so he was perfectly fine with coasting. Why his comp sci degree required him to take a fucking Restoration era English class, he had no clue. Apparently neither did his advisor other than that the ‘administration recommended it’ so their students would have a ‘well rounded learning experience.’

It was almost certainly just a cash grab to make him take more credits than was necessary to graduate, but whatever. He was here now. And so were you. Your presence was overwhelmingly clear, typing away and smelling like one of those insanely specific laundry detergent label scents—fucking rolling meadows and grandmother’s clean linen or something like that.

He’d never sat this close to you before, but that didn’t stop you from annoying the shit out of him for the previous whole half semester and going since it was just now passing midterms. Long enough for him to have pegged you as a textbook try-hard, pick-me bitch. You contributed to discussion at every opportunity, turned in shit early, and debated other classmates regularly enough to disrupt his in-course sleep schedule.

The way you dressed pissed him off too, with a particular style that was enough to stand out but not so over the top that it would cause disinterest from any potential mates.

And now you were filling his corner of the room with the overpowering smell of freshly washed hair and demanding he do things for you.

Fucking disgusting.

“Tomura Shigaraki.”

He jumped a third time, attention directed from his lap to the front of the room where the prof stood, listing out names from the board. He heard your name next followed by Kai Chisaki. The list was projected on the board as well, grouping everyone into twos or threes with “Final Project Partners” listed in bold Helvetica font at the top.

Only fucking English profs used Helvetica.

He vaguely remembered mentions of a final presentation—one of like three grades in this class cause the prof was almost certainly a sadist.

No, not almost—definitely. Otherwise he wouldn’t have stuck him with you and that weirdo Kai pre-med student who insisted on acting so elitist you’d think he already had his fucking M.D.

One time he asked Tomura to move seats at the start of the semester because he looked “dirty” and Kai liked to sit in the back—which, fair enough, it wasn’t like Tomura showered as frequently as he probably should but what the fuck??

With you rushing in late, chest out and panting every now and again from your apparent sprint across campus, Tomura was certain he’d be subjected to a whole 6 weeks of watching you try to mount that fucking Kai dude instead of actually working.

This was going to be a nightmare.

From the end of the table, he saw you shifting and turned to find that stupid fucking smile flashed his way once again.

If you had a tail, he’d bet it would be wagging.

“Hey, well that’s convenient,” you chuckled and plopped down directly next to him, sliding your noisy ass drink across the table with you and brushing against his thigh when you shifted your bag to the side.

“Yeah,” he nodded.

It most certainly was not.

But Tomura would never say that because—as his roommate put it so kindly—he was kinda a pussy.

People made him nervous, they always had. That’s why he liked computers so much. Code made sense, there were clear rules and when something didn’t work out, he could fix it eventually, but you couldn’t see people’s codes. You had to fucking guess at shit and it made his anxiety skyrocket which the sides of his neck and finger tips suffered for.

So he cowered like the fucking dog you probably thought he was instead and kept his eyes on the floor, letting you set up in silence.

“Who was our third?” you asked, glancing around the room. “Sorry, I was busy making a shared drive and I came in late so I missed that last bit.”

Why the hell did you feel the need to apologize all the goddamn time? Seriously, who would believe you were actually sorry for being irritating as hell.

And god if he thought you were irritating.

“Kai,” he grumbled simply as the man in question sauntered over to the table and fucking Clorox wiped down the seat before sitting.

Tomura watched your smile falter just a bit and grinned inwardly at the slip in your fake little persona. But you didn’t say anything more, just moved your chair back so the three of you were in a semi-circle and pulled up a few pdfs on your laptop.

“Cool, so I was looking over the directions on the syllabus last week and I set up a little work delegation thing so we can distribute everything pretty evenly,” you jumped right in, tone matter of fact in the down-to-business manner he was used to hearing from you during class discussions.

It was better than you so clearly forcing yourself to be overly polite, and he honestly couldn’t really care less if you wanted to take charge of this thing. You seemed kinda bossy, but he begrudgingly admitted that your suck up behavior did mean you sort of knew what you were talking about. He was just here to pass and you might actually make that a lot easier.

It was okay as long as he was taking advantage of you, he told himself. And you would be too stupid to notice, so he could play your game and play pretend nice all the way to an A.

That walking condescension on the other hand—

“I’m not doing that,” Kai huffed through his ever-present mask.

Tomura wasn’t actually sure he’d ever seen the bastards face without it.

“What?” you laughed awkwardly. “Yes you are, you don’t really have much of a choice.”

You stared at your classmate who simply stared right back with his own, equally confused expression.

“Why do you look so surprised?” you asked after a moment of silence.

You weren’t smiling anymore and your voice had dropped down about a fucking octave. At least you sounded more like a person and not some wannabe uwu gamer bitch.

“People don’t talk to me like that,” Kai looked at you down his nose, legs spread wide and elbow resting on his knees.

Tomura could feel the pretentiousness wafting from him in waves, and waited with bated breath for you to get kicked off your pedestal. Just a bit though, he did need you around to do most of his work for this thing.

But in a shocking turn of events, you just laughed dryly twice and turned back to your laptop screen, mumbling as you did.

“Really? Well they should.”

Tomura would have laughed too, but he didn’t feel like inflating your ego. Kai on the other hand looked a bit like you’d just spit on shoes and furrowed those stupid, plucked thin eyebrows at the back of your head.

“So Tomura, you code right?” you asked, turning away from Kai completely to address him. “I just remember you saying you were in comp sci when we did introductions.”

He was taken aback by the knowledge that he existed as a person in your head outside of this room for a moment and simply nodded—suddenly feeling far too hot in his black on black sweats and hoodie.

God just talking to you made his skin burn.

“Great, cause we’re allowed to chose the medium we present in and I was thinking of taking it in a more creative direction cause I’ve had this prof before and he eats that shit up,” you begin to ramble again, scrolling through a bulleted list, shifting the screen for him to see.

“Right,” he murmured, still surprised you’d thought this far and not...actively hating what you’d brainstormed.

Well, it was a bit juvenile and you clearly didn’t know what you were talking about but the concept wasn’t horrendous. He could work with that and it shouldn’t be too hard. It kinda seemed like you’d overestimated a bit with how challenging it would actually be and saddled yourself with most of the heavy lifting. That or you were just a control freak which was a little more believable.

He wished you would stop looking at him over the edge of the screen. He could feel himself starting to sweat. Rivulets falling down the nape of his neck and racing across his bare chest under the sweatshirt. Tomura sorta regretted not wearing a shirt underneath but he knew that he wouldn’t have taken off the insulating layer even if that had been an option.

It would just mean you had more drying, pale as fuck skin to look at and judge him for because he knew that’s what you were doing. Fucking vapid and shallow like everyone else.

“It’s really rough so far, but I have it the gist outlined,” you indicated to another tab and then turned back to Kai who had been sitting silently glaring daggers into your back. “So, Kai, since you’re in STEM I figured you’d be okay with doing more of the preliminary research—”

“I don’t think so,” Kai interrupted, shaking his head and pushing off his knees to lean back in the cheap, plastic seat. “Look, it’ll be easier for all of us if you two just make it look pretty and I can handle the oral presentation.”

You gaped and looked to Tomura with this pathetic fucking incredulous stare, like you thought he’d back you up.

Which actually, now that he thought about it was probably a good idea—he did need you to remain somewhat cordial with him—but he certainly didn’t care enough to defend you in any way. Kai was a dick, sure, but he wasn’t gonna let you rope him into being your white knight or whatever.

He settled for a similarly disgruntled downward twitch of his lips. The movement pulled at the cracking skin which stung as it tore open even more. Tomura felt the familiar crawling feeling on his neck and shifted in his seat to resist the urge to scratch.

He couldn’t pinpoint why exactly you staring at him was so uncomfortable. He didn’t like you, he didn’t care about you and by extension didn’t give two shits what you thought of him, but anything he might have said shriveled on his tongue when you spoke or looked in his eyes too long.

Tomura had never made a habit of talking to females and they certainly had never wanted anything to do with him either.

Maybe he was fucking allergic or something.

Whatever the case, you seemed to take his half frown as a sign of solidarity and leaned back in your own seat.

“Okay, look,” you retorted. “If you’re seriously not gonna at least try to cooperate, then there is actually an option to do the project by yourself and I suggest you take it.”

The look on your face was distinctly impolite. There was a sharpness to the set of your jaw that Tomura had never seen before, but it looked practiced enough that he could bet it was simply the snake that resided in every woman just waiting to come out.

“Look sweetheart—” that masked jerk began, also for some fucking reason looking to Tomura for support.

For someone who was very much used to blending into the background scenery, this was the most eye contact Tomura had ever made in a day.

Except on the rare occasions his roommate had friends over and he had to make the dreaded trek from his room to reach the fridge.

“Oh yeah I’m not doing that,” you closed your laptop sharply and rolled your eyes. “I get it, but I’m really just trying to graduate. I don’t think this is going to work out and you,” Tomura froze as you shifted your gaze to him once again, “seem okay, so Tomura and I can just work this out by ourselves and you can find a different group.”

Kai scoffed behind the black layer of fabric covering his mouth and slung his backpack over his shoulder. “Whatever.”

Tomura watched him saunter straight out the door as the room was filled with the shuffling of notebooks and zipping of backpacks.

“God,” you huffed and turned back to him.

His raw skin burned under the new wave of heat and accompanying moisture that slicked his skin when you scooted closer to him. That clean laundry and shampoo smell was suffocating from this proximity.

Did you fucking bathe in the stuff?

He was becoming increasingly aware of his less than pleasant aroma and the fact that you not scrunching your nose up in disgust just out of some stupid, ingrained need to appease him.

“Well, that was...weird,” you chuckled in a way that was probably meant to break the tension.

Unfortunately Tomura felt more like he was about to break out in hives if you came any closer so it really just ended up making the atmosphere ten times more awkward. At least for him. You, somehow, remained resolutely unaware.

“Mhm,” he hummed in response and picked silently at the skin of his fingers.

“Anyway, I have a meeting in a few but we can trade numbers and pick a time to meet up sometime tomorrow maybe?” you suggested, quickly saving the steadily degrading vibes of the conversation and pulled out your phone.

He really hated the full body pulsation that rushed through him at the thought of getting a girls number. It made him fucking sick at himself for falling into your stupid trap to get him interested. Was your plan to just use him to get a good grade or whatever and then block his texts?

It wasn’t like Tomura didn’t know about his status as the class ‘freak.’ That one guy everyone whispers about and makes sure not to sit next to. And he knows you know, so why the hell else would you act so nice?

He wanted to say something scathing in return. That he could do the whole thing by himself too—which he definitely couldn’t but that was irrelevant—and that he didn’t need you bossing him around either.

“Sure thing,” he said instead and took your offered phone all too eagerly, typing in his number and watching as you shot off a text back so he’d have yours.

His phone buzzed against his thigh and he jumped a fourth time, but you seemed not to notice as you packed your bag and grabbed your basic ass drink. The ice clattered against the tumbler, dropping cool condensation against the searing skin of his hand.

Tomura shivered as you waved over your shoulder and slipped out the door with another rush of students.

He sat silently in the empty room for a moment, trying to process the last hour. He pinched himself idly, wondering if it had all been just a weird dream, but the results were inconclusive. A minute or two passed before he pulled out his phone to scroll through the list of reddit and discord notifs to find your text.

Unknown Number:

— pEopLe DoN’t TaLK tO mE liKE ThAt

— not very plus ultra of him...smh

— anyway, library at 6 tomorrow ?

Tomura caved, digging his nails into the side of his neck and hissed at the pain, confirming the day's horrible reality.

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