#and literally if you have identified as one thing your whole life good for you. sincerely

[evisxerate]

Ppl on Tumblr will really sit here and act like sexuality can't actively be flexible or change over time. like okay lmfao

[etherealkissed88]

★ the whole point of law of assumption is that you already have it ★

imagine that you manifested that desire a week or a month ago. whenever you think about that desire, you would go straight into the happy or calm state / assumption that it's yours already...because it is yours already.

lets say i want $500k right now. i would be planning which stores i want to go to and which clothes i want to buy. i would feel happy asf and i would feel that feeling of already having $500k. i dont care how or when it will manifest bc i already know its mine now. i would feel fulfilled with this already manifested desire which is now my reality.

"why is it that your reality already if it isnt in the 3d?"

reality = imagination. therefore if i imagine something and accept it as true, it is my reality no matter what the copy machine 3d shows me. whatever happens in imagination is what is really happening. imagination is my identity. i identify as the girl who has $500k. the 3d's job is only to copy and paste who i am in imagination (the real reality) so, imagination is the source/the reality. why would i care about it being in the 3d if i know by law that it will reflect? i would rather feel fulfilled as the source than wait for a copy machine to show me, god, what i desire. i would rather give it to myself.

if i already manifested that $500k a week ago, i would automatically be excited asf thinking about all the shit i already bought w that $$$ and thinking about what im going to buy. i would prob imagine going to the store and feeling that feeling of financial freedom. i would feel the happiness of looking at something in the store and immediately putting it in my cart with no issues bc I ALREADY MANIFESTED MY $500k

"feeling?"

feeling = knowing you have your desire

i would use whatever technique i want (visualization, affirming, scripting, etc). lets say i choose visualization: i would visualize walking to the store and feeling/knowing that i have all this money to spend. feeling doesnt mean emotions even though its fine that i naturally feel happy bc i know i have all this money. its also okay if i dont have any emotions or if i feel calm bc since i already have it, its normal to me to have $500k. do not force emotions. feeling does not equal emotions. i would then accept that visualization as true. i would decide/accept i have that $500k bc i just experienced the proof in the real reality, imagination. i would remind myself that whatever i assume/accept as true in imagination is reality, no matter whatever circumstances i see in the 3d.

"you got robbed of a huge sum of money. was that bad or good? well, let me ask you this: did it change the fact that your nature is being wealthy? no, it didnt. your identity, your I AM, is set in stone. its only your thoughts and your interpretation of your emotions and of the circumstances around you that distracts you from your Truth. whether you have millions in your bank account or literally 0 in savings, you ARE rich. you ARE wealthy. numbers do not define you. life does not define you."

i accepted that i have $500k already = i identify as the girl who has $500k. this is why the 3d never matters bc no matter what happens, i will always be the one who has it in imagination. "deny the senses" mean i shouldnt care about what the 3d shows me since imagination is the only reality. if my bank account shows me $0.50 instead of $500k, will i be sad and thinking that it didnt work? ofc not, i wouldnt give a fuck bc i still identify as the girl who already has $500k.

this is why knowing and fulfillment are important. i know i have $500k, i am fulfilled with that fact. whats important is the knowing: i know i have this desire because i just imagined it and imagination is the only true reality so imagining = experiencing.

"how do i know if im fulfilled?"

youve accepted the fact that its already yours. you dont care about the 3d and you dont get discouraged by it bc its already yours in imagination. you are not "trying" to get something that you already have. you naturally think thoughts/have beliefs that match with your state of having it.

to be fulfilled i simply decide i have it or visualize again for fun. since i already identified as the one who has $500k, any thoughts, doubts, circumstances that pass will not get any attention from me. i simply dont identify with them. i go back into imagination and remind myself of my real identity.

this is what law of assumption is: ASSUME YOU ALREADY HAVE IT! CREATION IS FINISHED. YOU ARE ALREADY IN BARBADOS. assume = accept something as final without [3d] proof. the only thing i should be accepting as final is having it in imagination.

if you already have it, how would you feel, what would you do, what would you think, what type of person would you identify as? visualize/affirm/script/etc. the point is that you already have it.

ASSUME IT AND ITS DONE. WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT THAT FULFILLED DESIRE, KNOW IT ALREADY HAPPENED. YOU ARE IMAGINING/AFFIRMING TO REMIND YOU THAT IT BEEN HAPPENED! THATS YOUR CURRENT REALITY! NOT THE 3D.

its not "going to happen". the moment u imagined it/decided it/accepted it as true, it ALREADY HAPPENED. thats part of understanding that imagination is the only true reality. imagination is so limitless: you do anything, anywhere, instantly.

there should not be any "when is it going to happen?" since you just experienced it...thinking like that means you arent fulfilled. simply fulfill yourself again bc returning to the state aka making it natural for you is how it shows up in the 3d, its not about how long youve stayed in the state.

make imagination your dream world by giving yourself exactly what you want. know thats the truth, identify as the one in imagiantion who has it (the real reality/the real you) and ignore/dont accept anything that tells you otherwise. stay true to imagination.

@etherealkissed88

[cosmicdream222]

It’s not your fault you’re struggling, you were brainwashed by society

(A lil inspired rant)

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・。.。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

The capitalist society we live in is based around one thing: selling. I’ve taken marketing classes before and one of the first things they’ll teach you is the basic formula for advertising: Problem - Agitation - Solution.

Explained in simple terms:

Problem: Figure out what problems people have. They also call this “pain points”. In other words, figure out what’s causing people pain, what’s making them anxious/depressed/etc and focus on those problems.

Agitation: This means making the problem worse for people. Rub it in their faces that they’re struggling and suffering. Make their pain worse so they feel like they really need a solution.

Solution: Your product, obviously. Now you’ve gotten your target audience super upset about themselves, you give them the answer, in the form of spending money to buy whatever you’re offering.

Master this and you’ll become a fantastic salesperson - and a shitty human. Yet this is how society operates. Literally EVERYTHING is built to exploit our pain.

Now, this is problematic in many many ways, but specifically:

It’s causing you to focus on your problems, identifying with a state of lack, making you feel not good enough as you are right now.

It’s causing you to look outside yourself for answers, hoping that whatever the thing is will be the magic solution to all your problems, and keeping you in a deferred state (not having it yet).

Being born into this society means you’ve been exposed to these limiting beliefs your whole life. Parents, teachers, the media, advertising etc have constantly repeated the same stories of “you’re not good enough right now, “you need someone else to tell you what to do”, “you’ll be happy once you have this thing”, etc (in various different words)

It’s all BS created to make us feel powerless. It’s brainwashing, plain and simple. It’s also proof that the law of assumption works, “for an assumption, though false, if persisted in will harden into fact.”

So if you’re struggling right now, it’s not your fault, and you’re not alone. You were brainwashed into believing you are powerless and miserable. But now you know the law, it’s time to take your power back.

The real truth is: You are the creator. You are in control of your reality. You don’t need anyone else to tell you what to do. You don’t need to buy anything or consume any more info. You are powerful and you already have everything you need right now!

Persist in your new assumptions and your new story. They may feel uncomfortable and untrue at first, because your whole life you have been taught the opposite. Like when you get a new pair of shoes, it might take some time to break them in and make them feel natural, but eventually they will mold to your body and be so comfortable you won’t even notice.

Sending so much love ❤️

[sehodreams]

Thinking about perv anton with his older girlfriend not even sex crazed he just has a bunny’s libido

Wanting to fuck her everywhere in every place in every position

Mouth tits thighs

And he seems like he can’t stop discovering kinks

Even when he’s hazy with a fever he lays in bed staring up at her with adoration as she’s taking of her clothes and that’s when it hit him a new kink didn’t even know it was a thing (then he googled it) her skirt came off and her hands reached for his forehead bending down to push his hair away “you’re still burning up” she says with a pout before straightening up again before her fingers looped through her tights about to take them off before he stopped her begging her to let him come on them and eat her through them

got too carried away feel free to ignore this 😵‍💫

-🍒

I was literally thinking about something like that for forgiving others is easy, forgiving yourself not that much (god why did I make a tittle so long), but the fever is such a nice touch I love it 😭🩷✨

I also got carried away too hahaha, this is just a little thought, no proof read like always.

Tw and tags: MDNI, no p in v, sniffing, tights, sexual content.

Anton eagerly waiting for you to come home, his older girlfriend and favorite person in the whole world, happy to finally see you when you arrive from your exhausting office life with one bag full of his medication in one hand and a takeout order for him in the other, there instead of on your own apartment just to check on your pretty boyfriend after a long tiring day.

You innocently move his hair and smile to him, asking him how he feels and he really feels like shit but now looking at you his mouth answers before he can even process it, "a lot better now that I have you with me", making you giggle and forget about all your stress.

You move to his closet so you can change into something more comfortable, feeling his eyes follow your every move but already used to it after so many days and nights together to even mind, you pull down your skirt without much thinking, trying to find something to wear so you can give him his dinner and his medicine so he can sleep the whole night.

Anton watches you bend down to choose one of his numerous t-shirts, feeling something tingling inside when he sees the nylon become more transparent with the sudden movement, showing your black panties through it and the plump of your ass, making his mind even more dizzy apart from the fever that was consuming him.

"Wait," he says before you pull down your tights too, "come for a second".

You walk to him unsure about what's going on but not daring to question him when he looks so weak in his bed all alone with red cheeks.

He, lying down, grabs one of your hands and looks up to you before his other hand rests on your hip, touching the fabric and pressing his fingers to see how your skin accepts his strength and lets itself be molded to his own desire.

"Anton..." you call his name, perfectly identifying the need in his eyes he always has when he wants something from you, "you're still sick."

"I just want to touch you a little bit," he says as if it was the most common thing to itch for a little touch in those moments when one is sick.

You try to move apart and not let yourself get dragged into his schemes, but you're weak to the handsome boy and his well used and known tactics to get what he wants. Still, q couple of kisses over the back of your hand, two sentences about how much he has missed you and one look at the red tip of his cock that he displays to you with no shame is enough for you to open your legs and let him push his nose into the softness of your thighs.

He slowly sniff the aroma of the nylon, it wasn't the best one, but the feeling of the tip of his nose caressing it makes his cock jump and a knot in his stomach starts to form with every touch until he finds your clothed cunt and his eyes almost roll back his head with how good you smell there and how different the sensation of his nose sinking into your lips is.

Like instinct, you've been getting wet the second you crossed his door. There hasn't been a single night with that boy in which you haven't been fucked in his bed until you've been a crying mess and he had continued thrusting even when his groans have become whimpers and his cock has already filled you so much his cum is spilling over the bed with each push, so your body had started, at some point in your relationship, to sent a signal to your core everytime you were there in his space, ready for him to take you.

Anton had a sex drive you had never seen before, sometimes a bit disturbing considering how much he likes to overstimulate himself, not only while fucking into your cunt, but begging for you to sit on his face or directly ride his clothed cock until he came inside his pants and a wet spot appeared making you stop before he got hard again and asked you to continue. It's needless to say that you always walked out of there a bit sore, but so satisfied you never felt the need to sit and question why he was like that.

You're back into reality when his flat tongue starts to damp the clothing covering your clit waiting for the usual sensation of him directly playing with it, but you can't seem to enjoy it when your poor boyfriend is sweating out his fever and is down on his knees. A place in your heart stings and you want to ask him to lie and rest comfortably once again, however, knowing him, he'd rather stay burning up with his face against your pussy until he fainted than letting you go after noticing how your juices accumulated under your panties.

As if he was high, he has lost eyes and doesn't seem to have a single thought inside his head apart from getting what he wants from you, and even if the pressure of his big nose under you it's good, it's nothing like the sensation of him drowning with your slick and his tongue thrusting inside your hole.

You moan his name, wanting to feel him eat you out properly, but looking down at him you see him so satisfied sniffing and suffocating with your pussy over the tights while jerking off his cock that you decide to just let him get what he wants so he can find his release and accept his medicine without complain.

"Anton, will you go to sleep after this?" You ask hoping that he hears you through his haze and answers at least with a nod so he doesn't try to convince you into doing more later.

He nods and you finally can breath.

"Promise?" Your fingers play with his hair and you make him look at you in the eyes this time before he, rubbing his nose up and down while answering, nods again.

You, believing him, feel free of guilt to help him get off this time.

It's easy, just like you thought, you flex your fingers through his moist scalp and grab the hems of his hairs, and leaving the compassion you always have for your boyfriend to let him get what he wants aside, you push your hips to his face and control the pace of his nose grinding with your clit and his tongue soaking your panties even more.

Your eyes flutter with every thrust and he looks elated to have you using him, so he ignores the tension inside his lower stomach and permits you to use him like you want until, with a singular moan from you, his dick aches and searches for some type of friction, finding nothing until you order him to touch himself again.

After he cums all over your feet not more than two minutes later, before he asks you to let him cum inside at least one time (or to break your tights and eat you out with the excuse of not wanting to be the only one having an orgasm), you move and slide them down to then toss them to a corner of his room.

You order him to lie down, and pressing your forehead over his, you notice that he's even more hot than when you arrived. You sigh, cursing yourself inside for being so weak and not been able to say no to a younger boy with an excessive lust that should learn, for at least once, that he couldn't get his way all the time.

But you look at him closing his eyes with a grin and you smile too, thinking that maybe the work of saying no to him you should leave it to others outside.

[thisdreamplace]

for those who struggle

i recently got sent an anon message about frustrations surrounding the law, and how non-dualism hasn't made it any easier for them, but actually just more frustrating to the point where they're officially walking away from everything and wanting to just go back to live as they knew it before any of this.

the truth is that, oversimplification runs rampant in this community. as well as, hiding behind the realities of how difficult it all can be, because people are afraid of affirming that it's difficult or identifying with difficulty... but when we hide from this experience and try to come off as if it doesn't affect us, while simultaneously trying to give out advice, there tends to be more damage than good happening. the oversimplifying isn't the fault of anyone, as the truth is most of this is simple. but in actually living it, it tends to not be simple at all. the ego will fight till the very end to keep things the way they are, even when they hurt us. and that is worth being honest about.

when it comes to non-identification and indifference, this is not meant to be used to as yet another way to pretend something isn't happening or push down your feelings or gaslight yourself. i see these posts like, "just ignore the 3d and don't identify with it and you would have already have what you wanted" ..... this doesn't actually really help anyone, unless you're a person who strives on that kind of mentality. but i think a lot of people need a little more gentleness and realness, otherwise this journey wouldn't have been so difficult and painful. we'd all just get it overnight, but clearly, this community stays extremely active for a reason. because the million ways its already been explained still leaves so many confused and frustrated.

indifference is a daily practice, and it is NOT one that includes pretending something doesn't exist in exchange for getting what you want. it is actually, the extreme opposite. it's by acknowledging what's there... and allowing that to be what it is. the non-identification comes in from how you choose to see YOURSELF in relation to whatever that thing is. "this is painful, this sucks, i hate it... but that doesn't mean tomorrow won't be better for me. it doesn't mean my life is doomed..." etc etc etc. it's this very small flip within yourself, that actually leads to results. not trying to force yourself into believing you aren't even who you are when you've identified as yourself this entire life. remember that god's name is I AM, and literally nothing else.

and doing something to get something else is just... not it. it's time for you to truly want to feel better, regardless of anything else. that's why so much of this starts to get trickier than it needs to be.

non-identification is literally as simple as realizing... you are bound to no past, and you have the opportunity of every future you can possibly imagine. why ? because non-identification is literally just non-attachment. when you're not attached to this idea of who you were, of the struggles you used to face, you're able to allow in different experiences. and y'all... this as simple as being able to say to yourself, "i am allowed to experience something new" and don't let your fear of the unknown stop you from experiencing something new.

here's where it doesn't feel so simple though. how can you just stop identifying with this whole human self when the traumas of the past keep coming back to haunt you ? thats the thing. you don't just stop identifying with it. you let this be a process, a non-linear path to liberation. slowly, but surely, if you keep at it everyday, even when you feel you're only going backwards... one day you will realize how much more free you are. how much more easier it is to move into a new beautiful story for yourself, one that isn't contiminated by your past. but let today be today ! and whatever may come, let it come.

this is why just focusing on yourself is so helpful because if you're simply doing the best you can for yourself and your feeling state, the daily dramas are no longer your ruler.

the gag is that, the more you just do these small daily practices of sitting with yourself, choosing to not engage in the stories you used to identify with in the past, and allow new experiences to come to you... the more easy it gets, the more the truth of yourself begins to show itself on its own. you have to realize that the days are going to keep passing by anyway... so stop counting them, and just commit to yourself.

i also want to quickly note that so many seem to leave out the fact that behind all of this, within the pure nothingness that is also everything. behind our human identifications and all the things we have experienced in our lives, there is unconditional love. and when we actually begin to stop identifying so deeply with who we thought we are, we are lead right back to unconditional love. love in its purest form. so, use love as your guide when things get too difficult. it's the truest thing to who you really are.

you have to let allow yourself to experience the beautiful, despite how strange it may feel. because it's going to feel strange if you've never really experienced it before, and the ego is going to fight because even when it's good, the unknown is still strange and scary. and you never have to be perfect at this to get to experience the things you want, believe it or not. i know that i still have a long way to go on this journey, there may be much more time before i ever get to fully experience the promise in full, but that hasn't stopped me from experiencing the desires of my heart on a daily basis. that's because i used these simple things, these small little flips in how i chose to see life. even if the anxiety never went away, or it was a more difficult day full of tears... this is way more possible for you than you realize. if only you're willing to allow your life to be different than it's always been. just that small allowance, opens up all the doors.

xo dream 🕊

[lains-reality]

some ideas if you want to test how far you can go

obviously you are limitless, but you need to see how far you can go yourself, lester had the motto of 'i only know that which i can do' and asked 'what can i do?' since why not go all the way? not out of obligation or fear, but to see how much you can maximise your peace and joy! do it for the truth!

almost all of these require mindfulness as you need to be able to catch yourself in the moment of the mind's chatter - that you can get through being in the present moment (read eckhart tolle's practicing the power of now). infact your whole life will be based on the present moment, and not being in it makes it infinitely harder so please read the book.

whoever i expected something from: give to myself 

before you do this: go here! (getting to a state of neutrality first might make this easier)

this one is to think back on a person that you don't like, now think abt whether you expected something from them. did you want them to act a certain way? now, whatever peace, love, security that you think they were meant to give you, feel that yourself

and even if it was someone that is meant to give you those things, you will need to release your hatred of them and give them up. you don't need to forgive them right now, but you will soon when you won't care much of their impact on your life and when you see that everybody is acting off insane levels of fear. i released my hatred of someone who is literally meant to take care of me and now i don't care abt them, i used to hate having any contact with them but now i can talk to them and not have my mind run 50 miles an hour. also! they called me to say that they're working on themself & will repair what they did

just keep doing that and going back to other people until you feel no more obligation to care abt what they did! this is (one way to) how you become free of attachment to people, and less anger

astral projection

pretty self explanatory, just try ap, it'll make you see you're not your body

for this i'd definitely see how far i could travel and for how long

‘No matter what happens, I will create no more pain for myself.  I will create no more problems.’

this one is to affirm this at the start of your day and surrender all trouble and control, just this one day (or longer) you'll let yourself have no problems

throughout the day you can remind yourself, when you are getting wound up, that today you've given up troubles and problems

this requires mindfulness - that you can get through being in the present moment (read eckhart tolle's practicing the power of now)

‘Am i willing to live (in a world) with no problems?’

this is just a question to be used for self-inquiry, meditation, an affirmation, whatever

‘What would i do if there were no others?’

same as the last question

no input

no music, no books, no overconsumption, no anything

just like a dopamine detox?

this one might be hard too (and maybe a bit useless, but try it?)

‘From here on, i have everything i need as i need it’

this one is to affirm this at the start of your day and surrender all trouble and control, just this one day (or longer) you'll let yourself have everything you need

throughout the day you can remind yourself, when you are getting wound up, that today you've given up worrying, anticpation of the worst and projecting into the future

this requires mindfulness - that you can get through being in the present moment (read eckhart tolle's practicing the power of now)

remove time - stop living through memory and anticipation

"Time and mind are inseparable. Remove time from the mind and it stops - unless you choose to use it. To be identified with your mind is to be trapped in time: the compulsion to live almost exclusively through memory and anticipation." - eckhart tolle, practising the power of now, pg. 31

self explanatory again, just remove time lol

idk you gonna have to figure this one out yourself

good challenge tbh

deleting or revising something everybody knows

not just some memory only you and 2 people remember, something like changing the name of earth itself

or historical events, or the order a song came out from your favourite artist

go crazy! keep in mind that there's no big or small, its all the same concept in awareness, even if i do imply it

just thinking abt when you go to search the thing you revised in google and it doesn't come up lol

live as if theres no past

this one is something that you should definitely try

i think this becomes the norm when you are present in the now (which is why its so important!)

the point is when you go bed, wipe out your past, through whatever way you like. then in the morning make a declaration that the past is no longer relevent! no longer will you go back to it as a source of identity, breaking the habit of it!

inspired by this quote by osho

i think this one will yield interesting results

in the end, the goal is not especially to get results, but to release fear and limitations. you also get to practise being in the present moment!

[curiousgworge]

꒰‧⁺ stray kids in the grey's anatomy universe*ೃ༄

*ೃ pairings: skz!ot8 (individual) x reader

word count: 1.9k (total)

warnings: mentions of surgery; reader has low self-esteem in hyunjin's; slighty suggestive in jeongin's

꒰‧⁺ bang chan *ೃ༄

general surgeon!chan x nurse!yn

Every doctor has a favorite nurse to work with: the one who knows them the best, who works in the same rhythm as them, who can identify what blade he wants with just a shared look. To Chris, this nurse was you. Working in an O.R with you was as tranquil as meditating, as easy as breathing. Your presence made things a bit more calm in a more than chaotic atmosphere, and brought peace to his more than chaotic life. Either by handing him a 6-0 prolene or a scalpel, or a morning coffee and a great gossip first thing in the morning when he arrives for his shift.

But the O.R was not the only place where you and Chan were perfectly compatible. He wish he could have been a gentleman, took you on a date and made you fall in love with him before you fell in his bed (even tho you were already head over heels for him), but after another long and draining surgery that you guys did together, he took you to an empty break room and kissed you deeply, making your heart quicken its beat and the butterflies in your tummy flutter. And later he did take you on that date, sharing a drink over deep conversations and giggles over blunt flirting and explicit pickup lines. 

꒰‧⁺ lee minho *ೃ༄

trauma!minho x paramedic!yn

You couldn’t really remember a time in your existence that you wanted to be anything but a paramedic; While others kids wanted to be princesses, football players and international superstars, you dreamed of ambulances and the adrenaline of saving lifes. Your parents did try convincing you to become a doctor or nurse instead, but your heart craved for being and EMT like your lungs claimed for air. 

And you never met someone who understood you as well as Minho, the Trauma Director of SKZ Hospital, one of the best in the region and where most of your emergencies were directed. As a surgeon, he comprehended you in ways you thought no one ever could, as you came to find out in a great summer day: you were sitting in the back of the ambulance, waiting for any 911 calls, when Minho came to the parking lot make you company (since, apparently, his PS was just as motionless as any emergency service).

The quietness didn’t last very long, just enough for it to become a habit: whenever you were in peace, you would search for the chaos in each other, the rush of being with him almost as addictive as the one you dreamed of as a child. But even better than that was finding tranquility in his lips and arms after a long day of chaos. 

꒰‧⁺ seo changbin *ೃ༄

patient!changbin x nurse!yn 

You were never one to really believe in coincidences and destiny, knowing for a fact that all the meet cutes and fate depicted in books and TV were made up to distract people from the fact that things like that don’t happen in real life. At least you weren't, not until Seo Changbin accidentally (like, literally) showed up in your life. 

‘Cause really, what are the odds of your gym crush (that you saw only in the first week you had the courage to even go to the gym, like four months ago) coming to the hospital where you work? And that he would even recognize you (which he did) and tell the other nurses that he wants you taking care of him? What are the chances that he would fracture his foot in several pieces and need not only surgery, but also need to stay in the hospital for a couple weeks, and ask for you to be with him during this whole process? 

They couldn’t be that big, maybe enough for you to feel bad for the guy and not letting your boss rotate the nurses schedule, always bringing him the best jello the kitchen had for the patients, holding his hand when he needed blood tests ‘cause he was afraid of the needles (in reality he wasn’t, but it seemed like a good excuse to hold your hand). And maybe enough that when he got discharged from the hospital, you offered to give him a ride home and accepted the kiss he gave you by the door of his house, and maybe enough for you to find the best boyfriend anyone could ever ask for.

꒰‧⁺ hwang hyunjin *ೃ༄

plastic surgeon!hyunjin x insecure!yn

Hwang Hyunjin is one of the greatest plastic surgeons alive in the world: a big number of articles published and a bigger number of successful surgeries performed, and the biggest waiting list between all of the doctors that you tried to schedule a consult. So, after weeks of waiting, you are finally here, at Hyunjin’s office, going through the list of every little thing that you wanted him to fix. That’s why, when the first thing he told you was how gorgeous you looked, you laughed so hard your eyes watered, ‘cause of course he must be lying.

-Darling, look me in the eyes and tell me you really think I’m lying.- he said, widening his eyes and raising his eyebrows, which made you giggle. He looked kinda goofy, but definitely not like a liar at all. -Honestly, if every patient that came to me was as cute as you, I would be bankrupt.

And he spent the rest of the appointment punctuating how every little beautiful detail you showed him as a defect was, working on making you see yourself as gorgeous as he saw. And well, since he wouldn’t be your doctor anymore, there was no harm in him taking you to dinner, right? 

꒰‧⁺ han jisung *ೃ༄

intern!jisung x cardio!yn

Jisung knew from the beginning that choosing Medicine as a career would be hard as fuck. He already expected years of college and medical school, only studying and having zero social life, then internship and fellowship and crazy working hours and a ton of money spent, but unfortunately it was his dream, and he was already halfway there: his application to intern in the SKZ Hospital, one of the best there were, was accepted.

What he didn’t expect tho was you, head of the Cardio department and the most beautiful creature Han has ever seen in his life. Everytime he looked at you his brain became mush, his legs became jelly and he would be just as dumb as a rock in your presence, which was frustrating ‘cause he was there to learn and you were there to teach and he couldn’t process a thought when he was around you. 

And as frustrating as teaching him was, it kinda grew into you: a cute smart guy whipped for his superior at work, licking the floor you walked on? It was hot- your colleagues agreed with it- and that’s how you ended up making out with Jisung in the break room, his hands wandering your body while you straddled him, a weird feeling of power making you head spin and making you kiss even harder. And let’s just say that he opted out of specializing in Cardio. 

꒰‧⁺ lee felix *ೃ༄

peds!felix x single parent!yn

Felix knew he wanted to work in peds since his first day on residence: he was great with kids, his bubbly personality helping him win the sympathy of children- the trust of parents- quite easily. He was known in the pediatric floor between nurses and moms, received there between dreamy sighs and his patients' big mouths.

It was not uncommon for kids to repeat stuff they heard when the doctor wasn’t in the room, so Felix was accustomed to the “did you know my mommy is single doctor Felix?” comment; What he wasn’t used tho is to being attracted to his patients parents, but it was bound to happen sometime, and it happened with you.

He was very professional while caring for your son, but he couldn’t help himself: ending his visiting rounds in your room, spending a little more time getting to know and talking to you as your child sleeped, asking about a husband or wife perhaps, a big smile accidentally stamping his face as your told him you were not in a relationship.

And when you and your kid are discharged, he gives you his personal number. Just in case your kid needed a consult, you know?

꒰‧⁺ kim seungmin *ೃ༄

neuro!seungmin x neuro!yn

You always found the human brain fascinating- why else would you become a neurosurgeon?- but Kim Seungmin’s brain was just at a whole new level- you could never guess what the hell was going on that evil mind of his-. When you first got your job in SKZ Hospital, you kind of fell for him: a beautiful brain in an even more beautiful body and face;  but as months went by, the feeling faded away and in its place came the urge to roll your eyes everytime you interacted with him outside of the operating room. 

Sure, you were sort of rivals in the O.R, being both in Neuro and fighting to see who get the best surgeries, like removing a tumor golf-ball sized, and who gets stuck with the interns in a ventricular shunt; but then he would bring you a double-shot espresso and invite you to scrub in with him. His hot-and-cold attitude made you want to shove him in a MRI machine and analyze his brain in all minimal details.

So, when a tipsy Seungmin asks you out at a SKZ’s get-together, to say you were shocked was an understatement. That’s probably why you first said no, alleging he was probably drunker than he should be. But then he offered to take the interns to rounds while giving you a super cool spine surgery; maybe it was his way to apologize for the party? Or not, as you came to realize when he asked you again, totally sober and adorable, bags under his eyes and disheveled hair after a long surgery. And, when you enthusiastically said ‘yes’ faster than a heartbeat and he laughed, you wanted to stick yourself in a MRI machine too. 

꒰‧⁺ yang jeongin *ೃ༄

intern!jeongin x intern!yn

Being and intern is not easy and not fun: having to take all sorts of crap from the attendings in the name of your career, becoming a kiss ass and constantly competing with your colleagues for great surgeries that the doctors did not think you prepared for and having to, it was a very stressful experience.

So, having Jeongin as a stress reliever was great. He was an intern in the same hospital as you, so he wasn’t always available, but close: you would be in the skills lab working on your sutures and he would come, provoke you and say some crap about how terrible your technique was, and in ten minutes you would be in his pants in the break room. 

Later, when the attending would come to evaluate your colleagues and your’s sutures, you and Jeongin would hear and earful about how you could improve your purse-string technique and how Jeongin’s job would leave terrible scars. And while another intern would assist in the O.R, you would take the extra hours with Jeongin to study anatomy- and later maybe you would work in the damn sutures.

[reverieaa]

The self, fufilled.

It might have taken me a while, but as I promised in my last poll, I will deliver what you all were most interested in hearing, my explanation of the self fufilled. Consider this a pt.2 of "a change of clothes".

Yes, I say the self fufilled. I thought this play of words is not only interesting to do but would bring light to a new perspective that may help you come to your own understanding.

Many don't sit to really understand what " no other cause to your thoughts other than you" really means to them, we know, but we don't understand.

How do I stop my doubtful thoughts? How do I manifest quickly? how do I feel my wish fufilled? How do I change my state? How do I feel free? How do I stop punishing myself?

Well for the last one, you can start by putting an end to all previous questions, searching with the intention of finding an outside answer.

The opposite of love is hate, as the opposite of to hurt is to heal.

And the opposite of attention is indifference. As Edward art himself said that indifference is truly the answer to all your doubts.

I don't want you to go through your day and force yourself to imagine, affirm, and re-read every post you've ever read again and again until it finally clicks, I don't want you to fight every thought and scold your mind for "going out of place" either.

All that I want you to do is all that is required for you to do, change the inner. We truly are fortunate when I tell you this good news because change is all we do, all we've ever done.

I'll tell you honestly, not to give you hope and neither to shatter it or delude you when I tell you that majority of your problems that sound so complicated as the universe itself, could be solved just through self identification and a rearrangement of the mind.

I don't say this to give comforting lies, false hope, and support because I don't want people with hopes and dreams in tough situations to feel bad and be a moral person, but because the truth is far more comforting than any of it.

I won't tell you to "keep going" when you feel like nothing is working and breaking down. If you feel the need to change something, then change should happen, and it shall as your word is logic to your world.

I want you to understand that you're not meant to fufill the thing itself, but yourself instead. It's not about your desired face, it's about you, it's not about your ideal relationship and sp, it's about you, it's not about imagining the perfect life, it's about you.

It's not about using yourself to fulfill the scenario/desire. It's about it fulfilling and changing YOU.

Right now, you have a bed, you are not imagining that you do, you're not checking to see if you have a bed, you probably didn't even look to see if you have one, it is a CLAIM within yourself. With the same conviction, you use it for your desires. Take this example with things you have in your life.

I don't think people realize that the whole reason why trying changing the outer reality does not work because there is no outer reality to begin with, I mean that literally.

It is crucial to understand when you imagine that you are not creating the desire or a new reality, but you can only conceptualize that version of you to begin with because it already exists.

Let the ego mind go, let the need for outer change go, both its worries and time-frame of your life so far and just sit there with what I'm trying to say when I tell you to feel the wish fulfilled. It is a CLAIM, not a process, a change of identification.

Once you identify yourself with who you actually are, the awareness/ pure consciousness and believe that you is all there is , you won't want to "manifest a df" just to decorate the outer man, but you'll want to manifest it bc it genuinely makes u happy for yourself, same for every manifestation.

It all comes down to a satisfying claim, a claim of your observation that you see as TRUTH and are currently seeing in your mind.

For those who are wondering what knowingness I'm talking abt, it's the same knowingness when someone asks your name, you know you are (name), you know you're (nr) years old.

And so the same way you know your name, you know you have your desired body, the same way you know how old you are, you know you have your dream car.

We identify as body and outer when the outer world itself is WITHIN us, you are the answer to everything as everything has it's root to you, and at the same, everything cam only live through ypir awareness, nothing greater and nothing to "get".

If i view myself as pure consciousness, then I do not care for the 5 senses to show me anything because I don't view myself as just body, and this doesn't mean you can't deal with things in the 3D, because working in the 3D and identifying with it are different things. Therefore, don't feel the need to commit all your 5 senses to your imaginal act.

This isn't a for you to tell yourself: " ok, I have to know I am pure consciousness/ the creator and work with it from there" this post is telling you that you ALREADY are it, skip emotions here, we have established that you are it right now and youvare becoming aware that you are in imagination.

All we do in life is make claims within ourselves about things we are aware of having in the mind. Say you have a red car, and you think about it in your head, you know it's yours, you don't need to check your own drivers license, you know you have a certain hair color, it is a aware claim, you aren't trying to get it, there is no rush to do so, you are at ease knowing it IS so and are just observing your life through that state on consciousness.

And since you are consciousness, and you can get/be anything you want just by being aware that you are it, what is it that you can't do or be in this world? You can't be satisfied going after the "object" itself bc the only way we can enjoy things in this world is through the awareness that we have it, it has no life of its own outaide your own consciousness.

[batmanego]

SO YOU'RE TIRED OF BATMAN: AN INTRODUCTORY GUIDE TO DC SUPERHEROES

one of the most common things i hear when trying to get people to read comics is that they're just not that into batman. which boggles my mind! not because i'm a huge batman fan -- which i am, but i can understand why people might not be interested in his comics -- but because it's insane to me that batman (or superman, or wonder woman, or any other dc superhero they've made a movie about) is people's default perception of dc superheroes.

there's a whole world out there! and if you're intimidated by the big superheroes, or uninterested in their stories, or even if you like them but you're looking for something different, this is the guide for you. without further ado, i present:

DC MINUS THE BIG THREE: A FIELD GUIDE FOR THE DISENCHANTED AND DISINTERESTED

DOOM PATROL (1987)

to nobody's surprise, doom patrol is first on my list of recommendations. it's a comic book about a group of disabled people who have been labeled freaks, weirdos, or otherwise undesirable by society, coming together to save a world that doesn't care about them because there has to be beauty in it somewhere.

good for: well, i'll let the introduction quote do the talking. “remember when all the other kids on the block had superman and batman as positive role modes? well, if you could only identify with a human brain in a metal body or a guy wrapped up in bandages, and if you grew up weird, welcome home. you’re among friends now.”

read doom patrol here. trigger warnings for: ableism, child sexual abuse, medical abuse, transphobia.

2. HELLBLAZER (1988) BUT ONLY THE FIRST 41 ISSUES OK?

hellblazer is a 300 issue long comic book, mostly comprised of dogshit stories by dogshit writers. i am recommending it because i genuinely think the first 41 issues are art. please do not do as i did and read all of hellblazer. you won't survive the experience. ok? ok.

hellblazer is a comic about aging punk magician/occultist john constantine trying desperately to sort out his life in late 80s london while constantly being beset by poor life choices, poverty, and also lots and lots and lots and lots of demons.

good for: punks, anarchists, fans of the occult, enemies of aleister crowley, anyone who has a personal vendetta against margaret thatcher.

read hellblazer here, BUT STOP READING AFTER THE FIRST 41 ISSUES OK? trigger warnings for: literally almost everything you can imagine, but specifically discussions of child sexual abuse are prominent in the original sins run. also, it was written by a white man in the 80s, so it suffers from "white man in the 80s" syndrome.

3. WILDCATS (1999)

"FERRIS", some of you comic book knowers cry, "WILDCATS IS WILDSTORM NOT DC". to that i say Shut the fuck up DC acquired the rights to the wildstorm universe it's close e-fucking-nough.

wildcats 1999 is about cole cash (a conman and ex-special ops man), hadrian 7 (an alien robot posing as a human named jack marlowe), and noir (a bisexual ex-arms dealer from france who talks in the third person) picking up the pieces of the OLD wildcats team after they all found out they were soldiers in a war that ended before most of them were born and nobody bothered to tell them, and trying to 1) run a company and 2) save the world.

good for: people who hate the military, tacky sci-fi fans, anyone who wishes guys would suck more, anyone interested in the horrors of war.

read wildcats 1999 here.

4. SLEEPER

"ferris i want to leave wildstorm" too fucking bad. we're talking about sleeper right now.

sleeper is about holden carver, an undercover agent in the world's largest underground crime organization/network, who gets stuck undercover when his handler (the only guy who knows he's undercover and not just a traitor) gets shot and put in a coma. it is about grappling with your own morality, losing faith in your ideals, and (like most wildstorm properties), how war is a pointless exercise in horror.

good for: fans of spy thrillers, evil women enjoyers, evil men enjoyers, anyone who has ever thought they could make someone worse, people who want bad things to happen to people in power.

read sleeper season 1 here, and then sleeper season 2 here. trigger warnings for pedophilia (the pedophile gets beat to death in issue 2), homophobia, and child abuse.

5. THE AUTHORITY (1999)

stop crying we're almost done with wildstorm. the authority is a comic book about 6 super-people (who are very loose parodies of the justice league) forming a self-described "anarchist cell" to operate against the wishes and outside the influence of earth's governments to defend the planet against extraterrestrial threats and handle human rights violations.

good for: political science fans, good sci-fi enjoyers, people who think batman and superman should have kissed instead of making a million movies, people in polyamorous six-ples.

read the authority here. trigger warning for "this writer probably shouldn't have written this asian nation like this", homophobia, sexual abuse.

6. SUICIDE SQUAD (1987)

hey, remember how i was talking about wildcats? imagine the same sort of themes of wildcats (the horrors of war, the effects of being in the military, american imperialism, what it means to be a hero or even a good person), and then apply them to the worst group of people you've ever had the displeasure of being in the same room as, and they all fucking hate each other. suicide squad is about a bunch of incarcerated villains being "recruited" (forced) into working hero-missions for the government, because nobody will miss them if they die.

good for: villain apologists, people who (in the immortal words of hack/slash) think "there just aren't enough big mean women in comics", and this guy:

[ID: a comment on read comics online by “the king of anime” reading, “I want to give this a try would it be worth it”. end ID.]

read suicide squad here. trigger warning for, again "white man in the 80s syndrome", along with... probably pretty much everything else imaginable (it's been a while since i read this!)

7. STARMAN (1994)

starman is a story told with the drama of a theater production about jack knight, a late-20s to early-30s punk antiques dealer who gets the mantle of starman (a well-known superhero from the golden age) thrust upon him suddenly. it is a story about legacy, family duties, identity, and most importantly about being kind of a loser who gets shot at all the fucking time.

good for: sci-fi fans who are too proud to admit they also like fantasy, rock opera listeners, family disappointments, single fathers.

read starman here. trigger warning for sexual assault.

8. ARKHAM CITY: THE ORDER OF THE WORLD (2021)

"ferris you said no batman" i did. i did not say no batman villains.

arkham city: the order of the world focuses on some of batman's lesser-known foes, and the fallout of arkham asylum collapsing. i can't really explain it more than that, but it is good and legitimately unnerving at times.

good for: horror fans, enemies of the psychiatric system, villain enjoyers, people who live in new york city.

read arkham city: the order of the world here.

9. THE SHADE (1997) and THE SHADE (2012)

hey, remember starman? want a series about the old immortal victorian man with an "ambiguous sexuality" from it? okay. the shade (1997) follows his origins: specifically, his long-standing beef with one specific family. the shade (2012) is a sort of cross-country whodunnit as the shade tries to track down who is trying (and failing) to murder him.

good for: bisexual enjoyers, dramatic theater kids, vampire fans, goths, people who would have fucked lord byron given the opportunity.

read the shade (1997) here, and the shade (2012) here.

10. METAL MEN (2007)

lastly (but not least), a comic featuring will magnus from doom patrol. metal men (2007) is... a complicated story. it's about robots? it's about being mentally ill. it's about a guy who is so divorced forever. it's about being a little loser guy. it's about time travel, and terrible relationships with your brother. it's hard to describe. but it's fun.

good for: bad sci-fi enjoyers, people who can understand the timeline of looper, robot fans, anyone who has ever been consumed by a desire to create.

read metal men (2007) here.

BONUS:

not included in this list because batman is there, i encourage everyone to have a look at the original justice league international series. it is a superhero comedy. it is silly and stupid and i love it.

OKAY, THAT'S ALL! THANKS FOR READING!

[itsaspectrumcomic]

If you’re comfortable, what made you decide to seek diagnosis and how did you go about it? It has been suggested to me (friends, therapist), and I have suspected that I might be autistic but I’m kind of scared to find out for sure because of stigma.

I wondered silently for a really long time before I did anything about it - like, for years. I worried about the stigma too, or that I was wrong and I wasn't autistic and I was just weird, or maybe everyone found things this hard and I was just being dramatic and overreacting. I also self-identified as autistic for a while before I decided a diagnosis would be helpful for me, mainly for getting accommodations.

What started it off was my mum sending me an article about Melanie Sykes revealing her own diagnosis and noting the similarities, and I thought if she could see it too then maybe it wasn't just in my head. And then I spent a really long time researching.

I joined some communities of autistic people (eg discord and reddit) and followed neurodivergent people on social media to see if I could relate to their experiences (which was way more helpful than reading a traits list off WebMD).

I also did some self-assessments online like the Autism Spectrum Quotient (there's the AQ10 and AQ50) and the RAADS-R. I've linked to where you can take those on Embrace Autism since I found that website particularly helpful :)

AND THEN I took all my results and notes to my GP to try to get a referral which was another whole thing since the NHS waiting lists are literally years long.

Even though it took a long time and was pretty difficult, I'm really glad I went for a diagnosis! It made me feel much more comfortable in myself, and I've found others take me more seriously when I say I'm struggling with something. Most people I've told have responded pretty well, but I am careful about who I tell in real life because there are so many stereotypes so it wouldn't necessarily be helpful for them to know. You don't have to tell anyone if you don't want to.

If you're wondering about yourself, I recommend taking those quizzes I linked as well as seeing if you relate to other autistic peoples' experiences. Also, know you don't have to actually go for a diagnosis if you don't want one. Self-identifying and figuring out what your needs are and accommodating them where you can is also good :)

Anyway, this has been an essay but basically I'm happy I was able to get my diagnosis :) It's not something everyone can access for a variety of reasons so I'm very grateful.

[lloydfrontera]

a list of crimes bk moon has committed against me personally with the sequel in no particular order but you will Know which ones i feel more strongly about anyway:

javier smiling to himself and getting all nostalgic as he watches rakiel because he reminds him so very much of lloyd

like seriously this man cannot stop comparing the two of them and getting quietly happy because it brings back fond memories it is heartbreaking he literally has to remind himself to not get swept in sentimentality several times every time he talks with rakiel

and as if that wasn't enough damian and rakiel remind him so much of himself and lloyd that he ends up offering to help them without even thinking about it. like. he feels so identified with them, remembering how hard it had been for him and lloyd to go through that whole ordeal on their own that he just. tells them they have his support before he even realized what he's doing. he wasn't planning on doing that. good work on not getting sentimental babe.

when lloyd and javier are on a call planning how to defeat the demon king, despite the awful circumstances javier can't help but smile and then laugh at himself because no matter how terrible the situation is he still finds it enjoyable to prepare for something with lloyd like they used to do. "it was a feeling similar to a distant longing. or a joy that felt like going back to the past"

javier is pining so hard. like. it's insane.

AND HE JUST KEEPS SMILING SOFTLY WHENEVER HE GETS CONFIRMATION THAT LLOYD STILL HASN'T CHANGED HE'S STILL THE SAME PERSON JAVIER SPENT HIS LIFE WITH SOMEONE SEDATE ME

anyway

lloyd asking rakiel about javier. asking how he's doing. acting all nonchalant about it even kind of annoyed. and then once he's alone. sighing and then smiling faintly. "like the smile he used to smile at someone"

"'so you're doing well? i'm glad' a feeling that blooms for a moment. a memory that's suddenly missed."

i am. going to fucking explode.

and then. there's their actual face-to-face conversation. which. oh my god. i don't even know what to start with.

javier always saying "it's been a while lloyd-nim" no matter how long it has been since they last talked?? because any time at all is too long???

lloyd saying that if anyone hears him say that they'll think they're gyeonwoo and jiknyeo. y'know. the mythical forbidden lovers that live in different realms and can only meet when the stars align so to speak.

y'know. just casually comparing your protagonists to one of the most romantic and tragic couples in mythology. no biggie.

and again. javier smiling when he sees that lloyd is still just the way he was when they were together. hello. hi. can i help you.

lloyd knowing exactly how long it's been since they saw each other in person. down to the very day. "107 years, 7 months and 17 days".

javier getting really, really, really happy about it. about lloyd still being the same. and thinking that, maybe, lloyd feels the same way deep down.

lloyd being so very, very casual about saying "it's been a while so i'm glad to see you" very specifically calling back to the very thing javier says to him whenever they talk.

and then. and then javier. thinking as he sees lloyd leave. that it was really nice to meet him after so long. and that the sight of him leaving still felt the same as it did before. and wondering if those gyeonwoo and jiknyeo lloyd mentioned before felt like this too.

javier. comparing what he feels at seeing lloyd leave. to what the cowherd and the weaver girl felt at separating again.

bk moon i am crawling on your ceiling

anyway if this novel doesn't end with the barriers between hell and heaven falling apart so lloyd and javier can spend the rest of eternity together instead of helplessly pinning over the other and reminiscing over the lifetime they already spent together i will throw someone off a bridge <3

[moonshynecybin]

I remember many years ago, someone (and for the life of me I cannot remember who, but I think it was a commentator) called Vale "the man with the golden mask", basically saying that the Vale we see on TV and in interviews is only the person he wants us to see and that only a few people know the real Vale, and for me this has always explained why he is the way he is with Marc and why it went way from the ranch.

Unlike with people like Biaggi, Stoner, Jlo etc, he clearly genuinely liked Marc (I think possibly because Marc reminded him of himself lol but that's a whole different topic) and I always got the impression he let Marc see a bit of the real Vale behind the mask bc he trusted him, then when Marc rocked up at his ranch with his whole team, he saw it as Marc trying to outdo him and broke that trust. Vale then sees trusting Marc as a mistake, overanalyses everything Marc does on and off track from that point on (rightly or wrongly), sees a lot of it as Marc deliberately sabotaging him, even though it's just his usual demon behaviour, and then 2015 cements his view that he's made a huge mistake in ever trusting Marc with the real Vale. And that's why still now, even though he's had fights and crashes with a lot of other riders, he can't let 2015 go, not just because of the 10th, but because the others were just battles on track; Marc hurt him on a personal level and he blames Marc as much as himself for allowing that to happen. I think the "the mask" went back into place the day Marc left that ranch and has stayed very firmly there ever since, and had it not, maybe things would be different today. Or at least, that is how I've always seen it (sorry for the essay!)

i COMPLETELY agree.... ive already talked like. truly so much about how i think that marc bringing his mechanics to the ranch was seen as the first shot in their little war by vale... like marc transgressing on vale's territory and bringing the smoke to a fun friendly ranch day was spun in vale's brain as MARC being the one to throw the first stone here... like yeah vale has a pattern of icing people out once they become real rivals but i actually think he came into being competitive with marc still open to being friends (or at least thinking that lol) !! and then marc shows up at his house like remember i want to destroy you on track! :3 which for marc's insane brain (mechanics are my familyyy and what happens on track stays there) is fine ! but not for vale lol. and then there's insecurity and ego and marc being an annoying crazy person et cetera blah blah blah so it goes = divorce

i also think ummmm. literally every day about when marc had to introduce valentino to the audience in his documentary, and the first thing he said was "to me, valentino is SHOW." and then also literally immediately identified ranch day as definitively when vale started icing him out... like even if he was in denial during the 2015 season, i think in hindsight he is PAINFULLYYYY aware of exactly when that mask went back up AND when he was unceremoniously removed from the small circle of people who ever get to see vale without it. like there was a shift. and it hurts his feelings lol.

and youre so right! marc IS different than those other guys bc they had a really good relationship before... vale's ability to show the press only what he wants them to see is one of his most effective mechanisms of self protection. (SO effective that he apparently does it in his real life relationships, like with his dad)... if no one sees the real you, then you never have to be vulnerable. if youre never vulnerable, its a lot harder to get hurt. unfortunately for vale it also makes it a lot harder to build meaningful connections ! so i think when he let marc in and then was "betrayed" by him, it was a) a rare occurrence for him to get that close with another racer (academy boys are a lil different obvs. like he thought marc was his equal, which i think compelled him AND freaked him out) and b) deeply effecting when he felt like that trust got betrayed... so even though hes the aggressor in the sepang drama i think he felt pretty victimized at that point. which like yeah is delusional ! but is also just sometimes how emotions work. especially when you have trust ego and vulnerability issues lol

[bingqiv]

Saw your post about the Doctor's outfits this series and yeah! It's fun to have him change every now and then but every episode is way too much. The Doctor always has An Outfit that's their signature look and it feels so odd not having that immediate recognisable signature. It's such a Thing that we've had scenes of quite a few Doctors picking their outfit post-regeneration.

Even if we look at someone like 12 who changed fits pretty frequently there were always core design elements that remained consistent across the board, so it felt like a cohesive look. His silhouette was basically always the same even when there was a change.

Besides, the Doctor's always been kind of out of place and larger than life so having one outfit sets them apart from everyone around them. As well as being a very good way of distinguishing between each incarnation and giving them a unique identity. Especially as the outfits themselves often give some indication of the kind of Doctor this particular regeneration will be.

Weirdly I think the outfit thing felt most glaring this most recent episode because the Doctor wasn't in it much. We got a whole wardrobe change just for that? I also feel like Ruby has carried over consistent design elements between costumes more than he has...

you’ve literally summed up my thoughts perfectly!

each doctor had a look that stayed somewhat consistent through their run. they had changes throughout their run but it still harked back to their initial fit.

they only introduced a second reoccurring costume for tennant’s doctor during season 3 and even that was just a colour change of the suit, tie and converse. it’s still identifiable as the tenth doctor. even during the 60th anniversary, tennant’s costuming was still very much in line with what ten wore.

with smith’s doctor, they only changed up his costume after the ponds left in season 7. but even then it still has the core elements that defined his costume (and era). they kept the bow tie, kept similar material for the jacket and kept similar boots. it is the same costume just spruced up a bit.

then you have capaldi. they kept a similar colour scheme amongst his different wardrobe changes and kept the silhouette of his jacket the same.

now if we take a look at the different costume changes that gatwa has had over SIX episodes. there’s been no real constancy (there was an attempt with church on ruby road and space babies that hasn’t followed through with the rest of the season). the costume change makes somewhat sense during devil’s chord (if you ignore the fact that the previous two outfits had sixties influences and would’ve made sense in that era). but i just don’t get why had to deviate with entirely different costuming for boom, 73 yards and dot&bubble. especially when the costume that his earlier promo photos had were so cool (the leather coat and striped shirt) and they could’ve had the blue shirt that was worn in space babies as an alternate costume.

i just don’t know why they’ve decided to go down this route since the doctor has always had a defining look that has followed through their seasons. whittaker’s doctor has such little variation in her costuming (which for all the complaining people had was very much a doctor outfit).

and you’re bang on with ruby having a more defining look than the doctor which is an interesting choice that rtd has made. especially as this season only has 8 episodes and we have at least one more outfit change ahead with the regency episode. i just hope they pin down a look for the doctor next season.

[thatsmzbitchtoyou]

Tasty- Chapter 2

Summary:  Peter just wanted to have one night of fun.  Then that night of fun almost killed him.  Now it won’t stop haunting him.  And he’s loving it.  *Curvy/plus size, female reader Warnings: mostly smut with plot, some physical pain

Peter felt heavy as the sun trickled in through his window and shone on his face.  He winced as he tried to turn away from the offending light, his entire body sore like he’d gone a few rounds with Kingpin again.  His memory was fuzzy as he slowly pulled himself up.  He rubbed his face with his hands and felt a small but sharp shot of pain in his neck.  He suddenly tensed and jumped up, his body in a fighting stance as he looked around the room in a panic.

His eyes swept the room quickly, his spider senses not picking up on anything out of the ordinary as he tried to identify any threats.  He looked down and realized he was still naked and quickly pulled on some boxers and sweats before moving towards his bedroom door.  As he approached he heard movement beyond it and stopped.  Peter listened intently, sniffing the air.  She’s still here.  He flexed his arms as he prepared to open the door.  He wrenched it open and sprang into the front room, ready to fight her until he saw a peculiar sight.

Y/N was standing at the oven cooking what looked like pancakes and some eggs.  She glanced up at him and smiled.  “Good morning, handsome.”

Peter’s eyes were wide, his brow furrowed as he stared at her.  She flipped the pancake over and when she was pleased with the color turned and put it on the pile of other pancakes on a plate she had sitting on the counter.  “You…” Peter stuttered then cleared his throat.  “What the fuck did you do to me last night?”

Y/N turned to face him and gave him a sheepish smile, where he saw two long fangs where her canines would normally be.  “I’m sorry about that.  I didn’t mean to be so harsh.  It’s just been a long time since I fed, and like I said, you smell amazing,” she sighed as her eyes slightly fluttered and she put the plate of pancakes down on the table.  She gestured to him to sit and eat, turning back and grabbing a plate of eggs and setting it next to the pancakes.  Peter just stared at her in shock and disbelief.

“You’re sorry?  SORRY?” he yelled as he came closer.  “YOU’RE A FUCKING VAMPIRE?”

“Ssh, jeez Peter, you’ll wake the whole building,” Y/N shushed him, rummaging in his small pantry and pulling out the maple syrup.

“Don’t shush me!  You “fed” from me last night.  You literally drank my blood, and now I’m supposed to just sit down and eat breakfast like that wasn’t one of the most traumatic things that’s happened to me in my life, and I’ve been through some shit,” Peter said exasperatedly.

“I’m sure you have…Spiderman,” Y/N smirked at him.

“Wha–” Peter blinked and recoiled from her.  

“I knew it was you from the moment I smelled you,” Y/N said as she sat at the table.  “That's why you smell so good.  Something about that spider bite did wonders to your blood.  Radioactive material in the system is usually pretty nasty-smelling but whatever was in that chemical compound hits different,” she gave him a hungry look up and down like the night before.  It didn’t flatter him this time.

“Oh no, don’t you look at me like that,” Peter backed away slightly.  

“I’m not going to feed from you again,” she waved away his concern.  “I had my fill last night.  At least for now,” she winked at him.

Peter glared at her.  He was still reeling from the fact that he had had one of the most lust-filled experiences of his life last night but that it had come at near fatal cost to him.  A vampire was in his apartment.  She was feeding him breakfast.  He didn’t feel like he was in danger now so he slowly walked over to the table and sat across from her.  He leaned against the table and watched her as she watched him.

“Can you go out in the sun?”

“Only for short periods of time.”

“So it doesn’t burn you?”

“It’s more like an allergy.  If I stay in the sunlight too long it will itch and be like a bad sunburn.  I guess it could eventually really hurt or even kill me.”

“Does silver kill you?  Or wooden stakes through the heart?  Garlic?  Crosses?”

“No,” she scoffed.

“Then what does?”

“I’m not going to tell you.”

“Why not?”

“Because I don’t know,” Y/N said, a slight sadness in her tone.

Peter paused at that.  His eyes narrowed at her as he thought.  “How long have you been a vampire?”

Y/N sighed, looking down at the table.  “I lost track after a while, but it’s around 350 years I think.”

Peter’s eyes widened.  He thought through the history lessons in school, trying to remember what was happening 350 years ago.  “You’re older than the United States.”

“By about 100 years, yes,” Y/N nodded, looking bored by the conversation.

“Jesus,” Peter muttered.  “Well…why?  Why last night?  Why here?  Why me?”

Y/N smiled at him.  “Why not?”

Peter shook his head and rubbed his eyes again.  “God, I can’t handle this.”

“Eat, Peter.  It’ll make you feel better,” Y/N said, pushing the pancakes towards him.  “And while you eat you can listen.”

Peter didn’t trust her but did as she said, heaping some syrup onto the pancakes and taking large bites as he watched her warily.

“I have a proposition for you,” Y/N said as she watched him eat.  Peter didn’t answer, the food making him feel better already.  “I’ve been traveling around for a long time, feeding where I can without making a big scene.  But no one has come close to how scrumptious you are,” she looked at him dreamily.  Peter scoffed.  “So, I’d like to make a deal.”

Peter finished the pancakes and moved on to the eggs.  “And what would that be?”  He wasn't sure why he was even entertaining this conversation.

“I’ll help pay your bills, your debts, and I can even help you with your Spiderman-ness, if you’ll let me feed from you once a month.”

“Excuse me?” Peter choked on the eggs, coughing roughly.  “You seriously think I would just let you do that to me again?”

“Like I said, I was pretty rough last night.  It had been a long time since I last fed and I was feeling pretty desperate.  I can make it much more gentle,” she reassured him.  

Peter swallowed loudly, crossing his arms as he eyed her distrustingly.  “So I let you hurt me every month, and you’ll be like my sugar mama?”

Y/N laughed at that.  “Yes, I guess so.  But it won’t hurt, I promise.”

Peter sighed, rubbing his temples with his fingers.  “I still can’t fully comprehend the fact that vampires are real, let alone the fact that I’m even considering letting one drink my blood so I can get my bills paid.”

“Living in America,” Y/N joked, shrugging her shoulders.

Peter chuckled at her joke.  “How exactly would you make it…not hurt?”

Y/N’s smirk returned as she cocked an eyebrow at him.  “I have my ways.”

Peter blushed as he remembered how she had made him cum the night before.  He thought about how if that’s the way she needed to feed from him, maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.  You masochist, he thought ruefully.  He sighed heavily.  “Alright, deal.”

Y/N brightened at that, a small giggle falling from her lips.  “Thank you.”  She suddenly stood and started to gather her things, heading towards the door.

“Wait, where are you going?” Peter asked, standing up with her.  “Shouldn’t we, I don’t know, figure this out?  Like a schedule?”

“Don’t worry, handsome.  I’ll find you,” Y/N winked at him before shutting the front door behind her.

@aoi-targaryen

[foxxology]

How rude of them-

I'll listen to you talk about Skyfell fox. I'm good with my mycelium that I have.

Fun Facts about Skyfell! THIS IS A BIG ONE!

In Skyfell there are 8 kinds of categorized magic types.

Arcane Mage (Arcanist) - Think Wizards from DnD, they're magic is learned theory and limited to the material they have on hand to cast it. This sort of magic is very precise and usually ends up looking geometric when casting spells.

Bloodmage - Bloodmages derive their magic from their blood. When conjuring creatures or making fire, their blood is used as the material source. Because of this, most Bloodmages cannot cast excessively or else they literally pass out from blood loss. Bloodmages are usually passed through generations with their sources usually leading back to one of the other planes of existence.

Psi Mage - Mages of the mind! They can mould your brain like putty in their hands; hear your thoughts, cause mental blackouts, make you hallucinate, but that's the limitation since these intrusions can be relatively clunky and don't have much in the way of subtly. Psi Mages are seen as "relatively weak" when confronting anyone with even a bit of mental fortitude, after all, it's all in your head.

Silvertongue - Called as such because it's literal! Any Silvertongue is easily identifiable because of the intricate silver patterns on their tongue which is the focus of their powers. While Psi Mages are harsh in their mental intrusions, Silvertongues are able to literally weave words of magic to have their victim do any bidding they care for. Because of how dangerous this can be, Silvertongues are hunted. Can't weave words without your tongue.

Elemental Mage (Elementalist) - These are people bound to nature. As such they can only call on magic that directly comes from nature itself as an immediate equivalent exchange. Sapping too much natural energy from the surrounding plant life to seriously fuck up that one guy could kill a whole field for decades.

Additive Mage (Alchemist) - Alchemists aren't quite considered mages as their creation is more of a fusion of newly emerging technology and magic. You need to know the theorem of an Arcanist and the understanding of engineering in order to make these things work.

Devotion Mage - Clerics, Holy Warriors, and those stupid enough to sell their life to the devotion of a powerful being in exchange for power, all share the title of Devotion Mages. Magic derived from the powerful beings willing to give power to those who want or need it. Most of these sort of relationships can be for life, worse yet, if you're desperate enough to give your soul, there is no escape from your indentured servitude. Not even in death.

Esoteric Mage (Esoterist) - Esoterists are the messiest of the bunch. These mages play with things most don't dare to touch: concepts like shadows, the soul, fate, and more. There is no limit to what these mages could wield, if only their sanity could withstand the sheer volatility of the knowledge they want to understand.

[sugoi-and-spice]

DnD Commission for a really awesome Anon! Thank you so much for the awesome idea and your OC, and for letting me just have fun with it!

Fandom: DnD

Pairing: OC x Dragonborn, Humans, & Elf

Rating: Explicit - Minors DNI

CW: Scalie (Dragonborn), Monsterfucking (Succubus), Rough Sex, Gangbang, Self-Destructive Behavior, Cuckholding, PnV Intercoure, Spanking, Biting, Oral, Anal (implied), kind of Racism? Well, species-ism.

Love was war. One even more evil and malicious than the one Faust had grown up in. And that was saying something, considering how brutal and long the war between the Kingdom of Mortals and the Kingdom of Demons truly was. Even by demon standards.

Nobody knew how it started. There were legends on both sides about who fired the first shot, most exclusively blaming the other. Both had details that seemed equal parts plausible and equal parts ridiculous. The one thing that was confirmed true, is that it had been going on longer than whole generations had been alive. Including hers. An entire era of hatred and violence unfathomable to history before. Which made Faust’s very existence as a half-demon all the more implausible.

Her mother never explained to her how it happened, and she wasn’t around long enough for Faust to ever badger her properly. It wasn’t like it really mattered anyway. How it happened, whether it be an act of love or war, ultimately had no bearing on what her life would be.

She’d never really belonged in demon society. Well, to be honest, she’d never really belonged anywhere. But she stuck out especially in the world of fangs and wings and violence. She didn’t swallow souls, nor did she partake in the feast of flesh. She had her powers, weaker than most, but they didn’t seem to be for anything. After all, what was the point of being able to seduce prey if she herself didn’t predate.

If it was up to the majority, she knew that the demons would’ve killed her the day she took her first breath. Half-breeds were weak, and weakness had no place on the demon-side of war. 

Maybe that’s why she ended up joining the mortals’ side in the end. To mortals she was strong, impressive even. She liked to think at the surface level that none of that mattered though. That she joined the Kingdom’s side because she cared about life and that deep down she was a good person. But she knew that wasn’t true. Good people didn’t kill just to fit in, they didn’t revel and bliss in their own powers of seduction. They didn’t yearn for a mistake in the battlefield so that her Commander would set her loose to bask in blood. Good people didn’t play with peoples’ lives, as much off the battlefield as on.

Good people were people. And she was not people.

No, in truth she just wanted a place to belong. To be accepted and maybe even, she thought in her young naivete, to be loved. She should’ve known how foolish that idea had been from the start.

In what world would she, a creature of violet skin and twisting horns, belong in a kingdom dominated by warm-toned humans? What mortal could accept, let alone love the very face of the enemy they were trying to protect their homes from? Who could love a monster?

Things did get a little easier when she joined the mortal kingdom’s side. In theory. Thanks to the King’s Pendant she was given, she was identified by anyone that saw her as a non-enemy. Spontaneous attacks and attempts at her life as she knew with the demons, mellowed to hushed whispers and fearful glances.

A lot of people thought that it neutralized her powers altogether, acted as a leash and collar that her party-members could hold and yield to their wishes. And in a way they weren’t wrong. 

Did the pendant do anything to literally stifle her powers? Not in the slightest. But she took great care in not using them outside of battle, at blending in with the crowd as best as she could. By getting her lays entirely on her turn of phrase and tongue and skill alone.

Whether they realized it or not.

Many liked the idea of bedding a “tamed” succubus like her. It was like BDSM, being able to explore their deepest darkest fantasies in a safe environment, but further than that. In an environment that was considered socially acceptable. Forward-thinking even!

When really, they were just human pigs that wanted a taste of the rumors they’d all shared around the campfire as boys at one time or another. The story about how succubi are the greatest lays in existence. 

And in this way, they’d be able to experience that legendary lay, and keep their immortal soul. Win-win-win, right?

Yeah. She supposed so.

After all, she did like the attention. She’d been starved for it for so long. For any attention. She’d always straddled a line that resulted in unending loneliness and rejection from all around her. Too human to be succubus, too succubus to be human. So many times, she’d wanted to be looked at with longing, genuine longing and compassion, not just violent lust. With positive intrigue, rather than confused disgust, a question of just what the hell she was doing there. A wishing she’d ceased to exist. And if meaningless sex was the closest she’d get to that peace, then she’d take it.

Yes, love was a horrible, terrible war. And that’s why she avoided it at all costs.

Faust was fucking exhausted. 

It had been a long, long campaign on the eastern front. Her party had been pinned down for days straight until, due to the sacrifice of many, she managed to infiltrate the enemy Fiend Lord’s castle and seduce him into surrender. She’d fought and suffered just as much as her mortal party members, took even more overnight watch shifts too since she didn’t need as much sleep as the rest, and was as far on the front lines as one could possibly get. (She was the sole invader into the castle afterall). But of course, she received none of the glory, and all of the blame for her fallen comrades (who, from all of the insults they threw at her during the campaign, it was only through gritted teeth she called them comrades). 

After all that, it was understandable why her body begged for the comfort of her bed. Her mind however had other ideas. Running rapidly through the horrors of the day, unable to process the horrible names and treatment she’d experienced on the front, she knew that any sleep she tried to chase would be evasive. She needed to make her mind blank, needed to be needed in one way or another. 

She needed a drink.

Of course, that was easier said than done for a creature of her attributes. It was feat in and of itself for her to first off find a tavern in town that’d actually serve her, let alone serve her well. 

So that’s how she ended up seated at one of the seediest inns at the end of town, surprisingly rowdy with off-duty soldiers and farmers alike, looking to pick up a girl or two (or three or four — that’s how cheap they were here), but woefully alone with no drink in her hand and no barmaid’s attention even after half an hour. 

She expected as much of course, was used to having to fill her stomach with nothing but side glances and patronizing stares for a good while anytime she went out. So she found that it was these times that were as good as any to scope out for her companion(s) for the night.

To begin the hunt for her prey.

There were plenty of options tonight, a smorgasbord of men of which she knew would make fine, flattering company. Some tall, some short, many handsome, many more ugly. All of them eventually meeting her eye with either obvious disgust or ashamed lust. 

All of them, except him. 

Despite how crowded the tavern was, he was looking at her like she was the only one in the room.

He was a beautiful thing, truly. A dragonborn with scales that were more pearlike than white in their effervescence. They seemed to shine different brilliant jewel tones depending on the light in a way that she found intriguing hypnotic.

The dragonborn noticed her looking and quickly snapped back to the bar, sweet little lavender creeping up the back of his neck in a way she couldn’t deny was adorable. So he was a shy one, huh? That’s not what she would’ve expected from a creature like him, and especially not what she would’ve expected from a member of the King’s Royal Guard. Normally these men in golden armor were filled to the brim with confidence and bravado, that’s what wafted through the rest of the room after all. Then again, it wasn’t often one saw a dragonborn in the King’s Guard at all.

Members of the Guard were the most regaled and sought after positions in the King’s Army, and yet the ones with the absolute least work to show for it. As the King’s personal guard and right hand men, they never saw battle, but often acted as if they were on the front lines. She’d had some fun toying around with them before. They were so proud, so cocky, so above it all. Above her. 

“I’ve never done this with someone like you,” they always said, in a tone that dripped with an unsaid “you should be grateful” attitude. 

Fun in the chase, to watch the breakdown of their walls of pride and the blushes that dusted their cheeks as she led them upstairs to her rented room above the tavern. Fun to play with.

Absolutely awful in bed.

This one seemed different though. He wasn’t a captain or a knight, he wasn’t cut with rippling muscles built in the king’s private training grounds or covered in painted on scars. He was downright scrawny actually, clearly uncomfortable in his own scaled skin. It was quite the sight to see, especially for a dragonborn.

She didn’t usually go for types like him, or more accurately, for types like her. For the dragonborns and the tieflings and the other succubi that managed to sneak their way into the Kingdom’s “good” graces. No, she found her tastes firmly in those of humans, elves, and such. Was it prejudice? Maybe. She’d hate to admit it if it was. But it’s not like she wasn’t attracted to them. No, quite the contrary. It’s just that she typically went for the unobtainables, the ones who looked down on her and upon her with fear. 

The ones who’d never threaten her with something real. 

And yet, there was something about him, something she couldn’t describe, something she couldn’t resist. Something that had her walking up to the bar just to be near him before she could talk herself out of it.

He looked away quickly when he realized she was coming over, pretending that he hadn’t noticed her, hoping that she’d just think that he was zoning out. But the lavender blush across the pearly scales of his cheeks betrayed him.

It was pretty cute.

The bartender was facing her, staring right at her in fact when she approached the bar. But the second she tried to speak he turned his back to her. A few more times she tried to wave him down, but he was clearly determined to serve every other patron twice before he even bothered to look her way. 

She was used to this treatment of course, but it didn’t make it any less frustrating. It had her forgetting why she’d come over here in the first place.

A throat cleared next to her. She turned towards it, towards the dragonborn. Oh right, that’s why. Wait… But why was that why?

“What um… What do you want?”

His voice was soft, gentle. It didn’t fit the heavy knight’s armor he and sharp dragon spines that he wore. Nor did the beautiful kindness in his eyes, the genuine desire to help. It was clear that, despite how long he’d been staring at her, he wasn’t asking out of any agenda or scheme to get her into bed. It was just because he wanted to help.

Maybe it was because he empathized with her. Or maybe it was because he genuinely was that nice.

She was bitterly sure that it was the latter.

“Just a wine,” she answered, “Red.”

The dragonborn nodded and politely raised his hand, cheating his body a bit to make his Kingsguard emblem clear and command whatever authority it was worth.

Which was apparently a lot, even for a dragonborn, considering how quickly the bartender attended to him.

She reached into her satchel to pull out some coins to pay the soldier.

“N-No, please. Don’t worry about it.” he insisted, catching onto her actions.

“Are you sure?”

He nodded, “I-It’s um… Tonight’s on my commanding officer for us all. So it wouldn’t be right for me to take your money. Not when I’m getting it all for free, y’know?”

She cocked a brow.

“But it’s alright for you to buy me a drink on your commanding officer’s coin?”

His eyes widened slightly, a slight panic raising through his scales. Clearly he hadn’t thought that one through.

Okay, now that was really cute.

She laughed, patting him on the arm, “Hey, hey — I won’t tell if you won’t, alright?”

He smiled, an adorable crooked little thing, “Th-Thanks.”

The Barkeep finally came around, setting the goblet of wine in front of the dragonborn, of which he promptly, but gently slid across the bar to her. She gave him a nod of thanks and took a drink.

“So,” she smiled at him, the wine warming her chest and her confidence delightfully, “What’s the occasion for your commanding officer to take you all out?”

He looked back at her, genuinely surprised that she was still talking to him.

“O-Oh, well we had a big victory on the Eastern Front today,” he answered, twiddling his claws nervously, “Did… Did you hear about it?”

She could’ve scoffed. Of course she’d heard of it. She’d been in it. She wondered how he and his company had heard about it honestly, considering how deep within the king’s castle walls he was undoubtedly stationed.

“Oh yeah… I guess I did hear about that,” she raised her glass to him, “In the King’s honor.”

He looked down at the bar awkwardly.

“You, uh… You don’t need to toast me. It’s not like I actually did anything,” he shook his head with a chuckle, “I’m just a King’s Guard after all.”

Just a King’s Guard. That wasn’t something she heard often. Typically the King’s Guard were happy to boast about such rank, and to take credit for victories of the front line. (Although they’d just as quickly shove away any responsibilities for failure). They were coveted positions after all. All the honor and glory of a soldier with hardly any of the risk. She wondered what had occurred in this dragonborn’s life to get such a position and yet to be so bitter about it. One — especially one that looked like him — didn’t just stumble into the King’s Guard after all.

He was interesting. Very interesting.

“And yet you celebrate.”

“And yet I celebrate.” he confirmed, taking a drink of his ale.

This was getting bad. She wanted to know more about him. To find the secrets of the sorrow in his voice, the truth behind his sad, gentle eyes. To connect with him. And that simply would not do.

Luckily, she was just as soon saved from the pit of her vulnerability by the boy’s Commanding Officer. A cocky, drunken idiot, from the way he sauntered over to them.

Good. Just what she needed.

“Maugor!” he bellowed, throwing an arm around the Dragonborn’s shoulders, “Just what are you doing hiding over here at the bar.”

He raked his eyes, leeringly, up and down her every curve.

“...And keeping a fine beauty like this all to yourself?”

She turned to him, a sensuous, rehearsed smile across her face. She extended her hand so that the Commanding Officer could take it into his own.

“And who might you be, Darling?”

“Faust.” she purred.

“Faust,” he repeated, just as sultry, placing a kiss on her knuckles, “I’m Captain Melphi.”

“Charmed.”

“I’m sure,” he grinned, “Now what’s a dangerous little thing like you, doing in a fine, upstanding establishment like this?”

“Sir,” the dragonborn, Maugor, hissed, clearly offended on her behalf.

But they both ignored him. Or she pretended to at least. She couldn’t help the way her heart skipped a bit at the backbone he’d instantly grown for her.

“I’m just looking for a good time, Captain.”

He whistled, “Are you now?”

“Yes. Some pure, good old-fashioned fun. Any idea where I can find some?”

“Let me buy you a drink, dear. And I’ll show you.”

She pushed the glass of wine Maugor had bought her out of Captain Melphi’s view, behind her back. Maugor noticed. But she knew she shouldn’t care. Let him notice. Peons like him weren’t why she was here anyway. It was only the Captain Melphi’s of the world that could make her feel truly good, truly safe in herself.

“Lead the way.”

Captain Melphi didn’t ask what she wanted to drink. He just bought several pitchers of ale and brought them, and her, on his arm back to his table with some of his other subordinates. She hated ale to be quite honest. But she took the overgenerous pint he poured her with fake glee. Anything to appeal to him.

He dragged Maugor back to the table with them too.

The long table Melphi had stationed them at was full with many members of he King’s Guard, but the ones that stuck closest to him (aside from her), were a young human named Tophel, and an elf named Les — pronounced “Leese”, he specified. Two humans and a proud, clearly aristocratic elf. She could think of no better companions for the night. Except for maybe—

She shook the thought out of her head, turning to Captain Melphi with intrigue as he made conversation.

“You’re wearing the King’s collar,” he said.

She smiled, stroking the pendant pressing gently into her neck with a coy fondness.

“Aren’t we all?” she asked, flicking her eyes to the Captain’s own medal medals on his lapel. Medals of glory and rank. Medals of the King.

Captain Melphi laughed, a sound both high and haughty.

“Yes, yes,” he answered, reaching forward and running his own thumb against her pendant, “But of course, I was talking about this pretty little piece.”

She let out a little gasp, one that she knew would send shivers of excitement up the Captain’s spine.

“Now how did a beautiful, wicked thing like you, get an honor like this?”

“I just had to be really, really good for the King. Show my tummy as it were.”

“More than that I’m sure,” Les snickered.

Captain Melphi laughed along with him, then walked his fingers across the table towards Faust, “And I bet that was pretty hard for you, you wicked little thing.”

Faust leaned into Captain Melphi’s touch and purred, “You have no idea.”

This was met with whoops and hollers from the two men, the other two sitting curiously silent through all this. The other human, Tophel, was staring enchantedly, unyieldingly at Faust. Maugor was looking at anything but.

She decided to have some more forced fun and play with Tophel.

“Do I have something on my face?” she asked the young human, “You’ve been staring at me like I’ve grown an extra horn or something.”

“Oh, n-no. It’s nothing like that, it’s just,” Tophel took a large gulp suddenly of his ale to give himself some liquid courage, “Well, is it true?”

She tilted her head, playing coy, but genuinely wondering what he was getting at. There were a lot of rumors floating around about not only succubi, but her specifically. She was curious just which this mortal man had heard.

“Is what true?”

“That you can’t use your… powers with that on?” he asked, almost drooling.

“Private,” Captain Melphi faux-snapped, although it was booming enough to strike the young man into attention, “That’s a completely inappropriate thing to ask a lady.”

“S-Sorry Sir!” Tophel yelped with a salute, noticeably only apologizing to his superior. And not to her.

Captain Melphi instead took that honor, running his wide, course thumb over the path from her manicure to her knuckles, “I’m so sorry for the impropriety, my dear.”

“Oh thank you Captain, but I don’t much mind impropriety.”

Captain Melphi smirked, almost growling out in his own excitement, “No, I suppose you wouldn’t, would you?” 

She almost laughed. To think he’d scolded his underling for crudeness. 

The word slut, whore, and all other nasty little variations hung off the end of his words, but he’d save it for now.

Save it for upstairs.

“My powers of manipulation and persuasion, dream-meddling and such — the ones that strip others of choice, and that his Majesty, the King, deemed too dangerous to go unchecked. Those have all been smothered by this,” she exclaimed, gesturing to her collar, “But others, ones that can help in battle. My shapeshifting, my innate understanding of desires, I was allowed to keep.”

Tophel gulped, completely ill-prepared for an explanation like that, particularly one delivered with such unyielding eye contact. 

Captain Melphi, however, expected no less. He raised a mug in cheers, “Well thank God for that.”

Tophel and Les raised their mugs with a “here, here!” Maugor noticeably did nothing, just looked away uncomfortably. She wondered why.

She’d have her chance to dig for the answer soon, as her other three companions got caught up in their own drunken conversation at the moment.

“I’m boring you, aren’t I?” she asked with a fake pout.

Maugor snapped to her, genuinely taken aback by the question.

“What? N-No, you could never, why would you think that?”

“You’ve just seemed a little checked out ever since we sat down here.”

He moved to defend himself, but she was quick to make the kill, whip out the doe eyes and lay on the guilt that would secure him in her clutches.

“Look, I get it,” she sighed through batting eyes, “You’re here to celebrate a great victory for the Kingdom. The last thing you want to do is focus all your night on fraternizing with the enemy. Especially a halfbreed like me.”

It was a dirty little web she was spinning with her words to him, but she’d despise to admit that there was a little bit of truth to him. She liked Maugor. Felt a lot of chemistry with him, a warmth and comfort she hadn’t felt in… Well, she didn’t know if she’d ever felt this from a first meeting. She was intrigued by him, so a deep, deep part of her was devastated to think that maybe he didn’t feel the same way.

Maugor looked down ashamedly, whispering, “It’s not you.”

She smiled sadly, “You don’t have to lie.”

“No really, I’m not!” he insisted urgently, then leaned in, admitting drastically quieter, “It’s them.”

She cocked a brow. This timid little dragonborn had more spine to him than she initially thought.

“Not a fan of your Party, huh?”

“More like they’re not a fan of me,” he muttered then, “Of course, why would they be…”

She shrugged, “Oh I don’t know, it seems like they’re trying to include you.”

“They’re being patronizing,” he insisted, then added, a bit ashamedly, “Just like they’re being to you.”

Faust smiled knowingly, taking a sip of her ale. He was offended on her behalf. She couldn’t remember the last time that had happened. Had it ever actually happened?

“It’s to be expected though, isn’t it?”

“Yeah it’s to be expected… That doesn’t mean I have to like it.”

She hummed a little at this, “Hmmm. You’re a curious one, Maugor.”

He looked back at her, the bitterness in his gaze quickly giving way to curiosity.

“I can’t tell if you’re more offended on your behalf or on mine.”

“Well that should be obvious isn’t it?” he asked, smiling pitifully, “I’m not the one who has to wear a collar.”

“A lot of men like the collar,” she nodded over to his squadmates, “Makes them feel safe.”

“Anyone who doesn’t feel safe around you is a fool.”

“I have powers, you know.”

“Yeah? So does Les. Or any other idiot that stumbles upon an enchanted sword or staff. It’s not the ability that makes someone dangerous. It’s the person. And I know that you’re not a dangerous person.”

She looked away from him, finding it difficult to believe this sort of flattery.

“How do you know? You don’t know a thing about me.”

“You’re right, I don’t,” he hummed, “I just have a feeling.”

“A feeling?” she looked back at him with a deadpan.

“Yeah, a feeling,” he answered, “You feel… good.”

Her eyes widened. Nobody had ever said that to her before.

Lavender shot up Maugor’s face as he realized what he just said, “N-Not that way! I mean, I’m sure you do feel good— n-no! What I mean is— ah, damn…”

Faust couldn’t help but let out a laugh. And one laugh became a string of them. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d laughed, genuinely laughed. Not the fake coy giggles she gave her prey. And she knew that she’d never laughed this hard before. It was a contagious laugh clearly, as once Maugor overcame his initial embarrassment, he joined in too, the two of them reveling in the ridiculousness of all this.

They finally fell out of their laughter just inches away from each other, catching their breath as they looked into each other’s eyes. There was chemistry between them. That was undeniable. She had a feeling that laying with him would be one of the greatest experiences of her life, but not just because of the sparks. 

“Faust?”

She nodded, slowly.

No, there was something more there. 

“I… I um… I’d very much like to kiss you now.”

Her lids grew heavy, her breath hot.

Something she could see herself building a life with.

“Only kiss?” she husked in a tone that had the spines up his back instantly erect.

She found herself leaning in, allowing herself to fall—

“Oh ho ho, what do we have here?” Captain Melphi finally butted back in.

She snapped back to earth, horror sinking into her skin.

Les threw two drunken arms around Maugor and Faust, hugging them both a bit too close for comfort into his alcohol-reeking breath, “I think this might be the beginnings of love!”

No. No, no, no, no, no. That was completely unacceptable. She had to end this now. Cut this sprouting bloom down to the root.

“Say it isn’t so!” Melphi cried in mock-dramatics, then reached forward and grabbed Faust’s chin, “You’re going to make the three of us feel lonely if you just go off with him.”

She hummed in equal mock-contemplation, “Well now we can’t have that, can we?”

Captain Melphi grinned wide and lasciviously.

“Madam!” he bellowed out to the innkeeper, “You have a room available for me and my friends?”

The innkeeper eyed Faust suspiciously, but ultimately nodded and waved over to meet her behind the bar.

Melphi slapped Tophel’s back, sending him to go collect the key as he and Les collected their things and finished their drinks. 

As the boys alternated between drinking and whispering not-so-sweet nothings in her ears, she looked over to Maugor. He looked more than disappointed. He looked completely dejected. He’d certainly be bummed if the night ended like this, her going up to the room with his party members as he sulked soberly back to his home. But it wouldn’t be truly over. They could still run into each other, in the taverns or amongst the guard. They could still have something blossom.

And that just absolutely would not do. She needed to shatter all of those hopes and dreams. Hit where it would hurt the most.

“Got the key!” Tophel cheered as he practically sprinted back to the squad.

“After you then, my dear.” Captain Melphi gestured to Faust, to which she gave a teasing little curtsy that had the boys laughing. (Because what succubus could ever deem to try and be classy).

“Hey, you coming Maugor?” Les called back.

The dragonborn froze in the midst of bussing their goblets and quickly looked away nervously. “N-No, I don’t think so…”

“What?” Melphi demanded, “But she wants you kid. Don’t you, honey?”

Maugor looked at Faust, who nodded “shyly” at him, eyelashes fluttering, “Yes, Captain. I do.”

The dragonborn began to sputter, completely taken aback, “B-But I, I mean I don’t think— I’ve never—”

“Of course you’ve never,” Les snorted, “Nobody’s doubting that. So what better time than now?”

“Yeah Maugor! Come get your cherry popped!” Tophel cheered.

Captain Melphi rolled his eyes, quickly losing his patience with all of this verbal foreplay, “Are you seriously hesitating? When else is someone like you gonna get a chance like this again?”

Maugor looked down ashamed. 

Faust approached him, cupping his chiseled, spiked jaw in her soft as velvet palms.

“Please, I want you to join us,” she purred, Maugor’s eyes widening as she turned his head up to look at her, “I want you.”

Faust gulped.

“O… Okay.”

Tophel was an eager one, unbuckling his belt before the door had even shut behind them. But Melphi was quick to stop him.

“Whaaaaat?” he whined.

“Be patient, private,” he explained, “This beauty here was Maugor’s find originally, he should be the one to have the conquest.

Faust rolled her eyes (out of view) as she shed her cloak onto one of the nearby couches. Well wasn’t he generous? She made her way over to Maugor, who stood awkwardly just next to the main bed, staring at it.

She walked up to him, splaying her hands across his breastplate. Even through all that armor, she could feel him quiver under her touch.

“Hi,” she whispered to him.

Maugor looked at her confused for a moment, but then melted a little, relaxed. Loving the way he was speaking just to her.

“H-Hi,” he breathed back.

She smiled. God he was cute.

“Awww, come on, can’t we at least all have her.” Tophel continued to whine, just within earshot.

“Soon, kid soon.” Melphi patted Tophel’s shoulder.

“Yes,” Les said under his breath, “Let the beasts have their moment.”

Faust tried not to cringe at that. And normally she wouldn’t, normally it would hit her armor and bounce right off. But this time she saw the hurt in Maugor’s face at that statement, and it made her heart ache. He looked like he wanted to turn around and say something. Something he’d probably regret.

So she pulled him down into a kiss before he had the chance.

Kissing a dragonborn was quite the experience. The texture of his lips, which appeared rough and rigid, were actually incredibly smooth and cool to the touch in an absolutely addictive way. His tongue, when she finally was able to pull it out of him, was long and strong, able to reach back to the back of her throat if he wasn’t careful. And she kind of didn’t want him to be careful. 

And yet he was. So, so careful. His hands running up and down her back featherlight across her skin, careful not to scratch or catch in anyway. He never pushed forward or pulled her into him, just followed her lead. Part of it was probably his virginal status. But she was pretty sure that he was also just like this too. As sharp as he was, he’d never let someone get hurt on his point.

Maybe that’s why he became a King’s Guard. Not out of fear of death, but so he wouldn’t hurt anyone.

She pulled away reluctantly, a long trail of spit connecting the two panting lovers. She could kiss him for days she knew, but right now she wanted more.

“Do you want me to undress you?” she purred between labored breaths.

“N-No,” he answered, stepping back hesitantly, “I’ve got it.”

She smiled, smitten with his shyness.

That adoration very quickly turned to desperation however as he shed his uniform. Of course those beautiful, iridescent scales went all the way down his body, but what she wasn’t necessarily expecting was the toned, lean muscle they covered. He’d seemed downright scrawny in all that armor back down at the bar, but here it was clear that even though he may have been the runt of the hatchlings at one time, he was anything but weak now. He’d gone through boot camp just like the rest of them, and came out the otherside a gorgeous specimen.

God, and then there was his cock, she thought greedily as it bounced out from his trousers. Thick and dipping a bit under its own weight. It contrasted the rest of his body deep violet — a color she’d always hated in her own skin, but that she had to admit looked absolutely exquisite on Maugor.

She was on her knees in front of him before he could even turn back to her, capturing him in her mouth before he could get a single word out.

“Ngh—!”

His hands reached down to cup her face, pulling her off of him gently but shakily.

“P-Please, you don’t have to—”

“Do you not want me to?” she asked.

His eyes widened a bit, and then he looked away with a blush.

“I… I never said that.”

She grinned, pressing his cockhead against her lips as she whispered, “Then there’s no problem.”

He cried out, hooked toes audibly curling into the wooden floor as she took him back into her mouth.

The feel of him was even more glorious than the view. Impossibly hot, but smooth as silk. His precum tingled her tongue, and the dribbles of it seemed endless. She could feel her own body getting hotter and hotter with every taste. She realized all too late that it must’ve had an aphrodisiacal quality to it, and just how addictive it felt to be on the other side of a power like that.

Maugor gasped as Faust pulled off of him with a pop. She couldn’t wait anymore. He was making it impossible to wait anymore.

She looked up at him with pure sex in her eyes.

“How do you want me?”

Maugor gulped.

“I… I want to look at you.”

Her smile widened, god he was cute. She could definitely work with that.

She climbed back onto the bed with her legs spread shamelessly. Maugor didn’t dare move, too awestruck by the spectacular view, the heavenly situation he’d somehow found himself in.

Faust chuckled, falling harder and harder for his sweetness by the second, “Well? Do you just want to look at me?”

“Yeah rookie,” Melphi piped in, “Are you just gonna look? Or do you need your Commanding Officer to show you how it’s done?”

Maugor’s eyes widened in horror.

“N-No!” he yelped, then corrected gruffer, “I mean, no.”

He stepped forward, grabbing her legs with fake roughness (in reality he held her quite delicately), and moved them to wrap around his hips. Even his fake-dominance sparked something new in her, and it got her thinking just how much damage he could really do to her if he tried. 

She sighed blissfully as she tightened her legs around him, reveling in the feeling of his smooth, cool scales pressing into her thighs. He didn’t even need to line himself up with her, the hot soak of her womanhood, the bullying weight of his cock, it was like they were made for each other, magnetic. Like two missing puzzle pieces, he instantly started to sink.

Maugor let out a strangled yelp that had their other companions bursting out laughing.

"Attaboy, Maugor! Attaboy!” Captain Melphi cheered out.

“Woooo!” Tophel joined in, as Les applauded politely between them.

But Maugor ignored them, tracing his claws delicately along her jaw. He was too engulfed in the way that she moaned and writhed just on the feeling of him being inside her. Everything about him, the size and stretch, the texture, the heat it was enough to have her almost cumming on the spot.

Almost.

She tightened her legs around his hips, urging him to fuck her.

“W-Wait,” he gasped, “I-I-I don’t think I’m gonna last.”

Faust smirked. God he was so cute.

“I don’t mind, sweetheart.”

“I do,” he whined.

She chuckled, reaching her hand out to rest against his chest. It glowed subtly at where they connected and Maugor’s eyes widened.

“You have nothing to worry about my darling.”

And suddenly he grew even harder inside her.

“I’ll keep you going as long as you want.”

A blissed out growl tore from the back of his throat then, animalistic in it’s gratitude as he dragged himself out of her slowly, then slammed back in definitively.

Faust practically squealed in delight, falling in love with the way his claws dug ever so slightly into the meat of her hip and shoulder. 

“We can switch positions anytime you like,” she gasped out between thrusts.

“N-No, no way! You’re… You’re so beautiful,” he groaned, cupping her entire face in just one of his hands, “So, so beautiful!”

Something struck her oddly at those words, the desperate honesty in them. Something that had her chest aching and eyes prickling. So as Maugor figured out a new, delicious roll of his hips, she threw her head back not just from the pleasure, but to whip those feelings back.

She lost track of how long he fucked her, it could’ve been minutes, could’ve been hours — she wanted to let him go on for days. Particularly when he found a brand new rhythm, his legs spreading wide enough so that his thich hit the mattress with every thrust, that forced her own knees up into his ribs. Grinding and humping into her deeper and harder than before.

“S-So good, amazing! I-I wanna fuck you forever!” he groaned out. 

And she had full intentions of letting Maugor do so, to fuck her until he was in tears begging her to cum. And yet, with the feel of his pelvis grinding into her clit, the powerful thrusts of his strong, beautiful cock unlike any she’d ever had, and the overwhelming feelings he was filling her with, she found herself coming completely (and prematurely) undone.

Her hand fell from Maugor’s chest, twisting tight in the sheets as her orgasm wracked through her, and as a result, her dragonborn companion was not far behind. His cock swelled impossibly harder, hotter as he slammed into her with newfound feverishness, chasing his own orgasm desperately behind her.

“Oh— Oh, god, I— I’m—!”

Maugor dropped his head into her shoulder, instinct completely taking over as he sunk his teeth into the crux of her neck. They went deep, those sharp monstrous teeth of his, but his cock went even deeper, bullying further and further into her until it was kissing her cervix. Then, when she was as tight to him as physically possible, did his body finally allow him to cum.

Instinct. That’s what she knew she should write it off as. Nothing more than an instinctual need to mate. And yet, she found herself getting completely lost in his grip, in the warmth and desire that his tightness promised. It was like he never wanted to let her go, not even for a second. Like he worshiped her. 

Like he was falling in love with her.

The feeling was even harder to deny when he finally pulled away from her, horror filling his expression as he saw the dribble of deep violet blood pooling down into her collarbone.

“O-Oh my—” he panicked, looking around quickly until he could grab a piece of clothing (one of his dressings notably), to clean her off with, “I’m so, so sorry!”

She smiled up at him dazedly, falling deeper and deeper into his cuteness, that sweet lavender blush of his.

“I-I don’t know what came over me! Really, I’m so so so—”

“It’s okay!” she finally spoke, stopping Maugor’s rambling in his tracks. She reached up to him, running her hands along the spines on his jaw affectionately, “I actually really liked it.”

Maugor’s light lavender flush suddenly set ablaze a raging violet close to her own skin. And she couldn’t help but giggle. How such a sweet, adorable thing could have ended up in a haughty, terrible organization like the King’s Guard, she’d never know.

And she really couldn’t wait to find out.

“Oh you did, did you?” Melphi suddenly said, shocking Maugor and Faust both out of their stupor.

They had both forgotten that they weren’t alone.

She snapped back to the Captain, white hot panic flooding her chest. For anyone else, that panic would be at the realization that, after potentially just making a soul connection with Maugor here, she’d now have to deal with the three other King’s Guardsmen, rubbing themselves with and without clothes at the sight.

But she wasn’t anyone else. And fucking more men wasn’t the problem.

What was she doing? Getting emotionally attached to a lay? That’s not what these escapades were for, that’s not what anything she did was for. Following down this path, it’d only get her hurt in the end.

She needed to do what she came here to do, do exactly what she’d always intended with Maugor and end this, end this right fucking now.

“I should’ve known a Succubus Slut like you would like it rough,” he smirked, reaching his large, commanding hand towards her body.

Maugor hunched over her protectively, making her heart ache. Why was he making this so much harder than he needed to?

“I think she’s had enough,” he growled.

Captain Melphi shook his head with a laugh, “Oh virgins. Come now Maugor, that’s enough of that. It’s time to share.”

Maugor crouched tighter over her, appearing totally like a dragonborn worth the name.

“She doesn’t want to!” he snapped.

Melphi just looked between the two, amused.

“Is this the truth dear? You don’t want the rest of us?”

Maugor glared at his commanding officer, “That’s what I said—”

“Of course I do.”

Maugor snapped back to her, shocked.

“Wait… W-What—?”

Captain Melphi smirked, reaching his hand down past Maugor and running his thumb along Faust’s bottom lip.

“That’s what I like to hear.”

The corners of Faust’s lips quirked a little back, before she opened it slightly to allow his thumb access. She wasn’t obscene about it, she just let her mouth go soft around him, her tongue running sweet little swirls around the tip. Regardless, it caused a nearly inhuman growl to leave that human.

“And that’s what I love to see.”

Faust rolled over onto her hands and knees, her mouth latched to Melphi’s thumb the whole time. She barely threw back a teasing glance at Maugor as she climbed out from under him, but that was long enough for her to see the devastated look on his face.

And even more troubling, long enough to make her feel bad about it.

Tophel had practically clamored over his squadmates to get to Faust. And even though Melphi had been the one to pull her away from Maugor, he was a chivalrous enough Captain to hand her over to his subordinate with grace.

The young human soldier was completely obsessed with her tits. Squeezing and rolling them, pinching and biting. They were everything for him. Everything.

“God they’re perfect,” he whined from between them, “So perfect.”

Les and Melphi snickered from the couch across from them. Shaking their heads at the shameless display of their youngest squadmate.

“Yeah, you’ve been in them for like ten minutes!” Melphi called out.

“Aren’t you bored?” Les added.

“Never, oh no no, never!” he cried out before latching himself onto her nipple in a manner that had her struggling not to roll her eyes.

Melphi chuckled, turning to Maugor who sat actively looking away on the couch arm.

“What do you think, son?” he asked, “Think that rack is worth all that hype?”

The dragonborn didn’t say anything. Just took a swig from one of the bottles of wine they’d brought up to the room and stared at the wallpaper.

Melphi waved him off, turning back to the scene in time to see Tophel shoving Faust onto her back so that he could climb onto her chest.

“Now that’s what I’m talking about.” he chuckled.

Faust, figuring the drill, grabbed onto her breasts and started to push them together for him as he pulled off his pants and shimmied up to straddle her ribcage. But he held a hand out, stopping her.

“Not yet, just one second,” he told her, “Hold them open actually.”

She gave him a confused look but did as she was told.

Then he spat on her chest. 

Les and Melphi burst out laughing across the room, particularly amused by the confused look on Faust’s face.

“Now rub ‘em together.” Tophel ordered excitedly.

“Oh you sick, fuck!” Melphi laughed.

Tophel ignored them, just looking at her expectantly.

“Well, come on.”

Although taken aback, she did what she was told. Rubbing her cleavage together and in rounds so that Tophel’s saliva coated the skin in-between evenly.

“Now open again.”

This repeated about three more times, Tophel spitting all over her breasts, her nipples, and her having to rub it all about herself until she was completely coated and shiny in her spit.

“There we go,” he practically drooled, grabbing her tits from her and holding them together almost painfully tight, “That’s what we want.”

And he slipped his dick between them, only lasting a good five pumps before he was coating her skin all over again.

Les just wanted her mouth. An Elf like him would never dare to sink so low as to sink his dick into a filthy succubus. And honestly, even calling it a blowjob would be generous for herself. Apparently, he was too high and mighty to believe that a literal sex demon would ever be able to pleasure him.

His fingers curled tight around her horns, moving her head up and down and up and down at a quick, yet metronomic pace. Every time she tried a move of her own, he’d immediately pull her back, giving her an obnoxious tutting and a finger wag.

“Nuh-uh-uh. Not like that. Just follow my lead, silly girl.”

His lead apparently was just jacking himself off with her mouth.

Everything about him was perfect, she supposed. His endless silver locks. His fine, truly porcelain skin. The lithe, rippling muscles of his abdomen. Anyone would be lucky to even be seen with him, let alone have him as a lay.

That’s what he kept telling her anyway.

“This must be a big deal to you, to have an elven cock in your mouth. I’m sure you’ve never dreamed of having something this fine.”

Before she could nod or even hum in agreement, he was giving a quick little patronizing pat to her forehead.

“No need to answer. I already know.”

“God, Les, you’re a douchebag!” Tophel groaned from across the room.

“Hey now, hey now, Tophel,” Melphi scolded, “You had your fun, now let the douchebag have his.”

Les scoffed at them.

“Fun? Oh please, this barely even passes the t-time,” he said in a voice, that through its breathiness and cracking said something completely different.

The closer he got, the longer he kept her pinned to his perfectly angular (and shaved), pelvis. At one point he wasn’t even pulling her back anymore, just holding her in place as he rolled his hips, fucking the quickly-constricting back of her throat.

When he did finally yank her head back for the last time, allowing her to gasp and sputter, dark-faced, he was just as quick to slap a hand over her lips, looking her dead in the eye as he pumped himself quickly, perfectly.

“Now don’t you dare swallow.”

Faust understood. After all, who was she to even think about swallowing precious, elven cum?

Ugh, whatever.

Captain Melphi himself was an ass man, in every sense of the word.

She gasped as he slapped a broad palm with moderate power against her cheek.

“That wasn’t too hard, was it?”

Faust looked back up at him from her place across his knee and smiled pretty. 

“No, not at all Captain.”

Melphi grinned absolutely obscenely.

“Oh yeah, I bet you like it hard, don’t you?” he growled, punctuating with a slap across her ass much harder than the last.

She yelped out in surprise, “Y-Yes! Yes Captain!”

Melphi bellowed out a laugh deep from within his gut, practically giddy from the pleasure this abuse brought him.

“You see this boys?!” Captain Melphi called out to his squad.

Les and Tophel looked up from their spots across the room, where they had been recuperating with wine and smokes.

“This is what we’re going to do to every demon bitch we come across on the battlefield!” he cheered with another, harder slap.

“Here, here!” Tophel back.

 “You don’t even have to worry about whether you’re hurting them or not!”

Slap.

Tophel and Les watched the sight, completely entranced.

“They’ll fucking like it!”

Slap.

Maugor laid abandoned on the spare bed across the room, his back to them all.

“They’ll fucking love it!”

Slap. Slap. Slap.

“Isn’t that right you dumb, succubus whore?” he paused his assault momentarily, so as to growl into her ear.

Tears started to prick the corner of her eyes. From the pain, from the words, or from the fact that Maugor couldn’t even bear to look at her anymore, she wasn’t sure. She supposed it didn’t matter. After all, this is what she’d wanted. This is all she could ever truly bring herself to hope for.

So she swallowed back her tears and looked back at Captain Melphi with a wobbly smile.

“Y-Yes, Captain. I fucking love it!”

Melphi let out a combination of a groan and a laugh, his cock twitching hard at that pathetic, beautiful look on her face. 

“Go bend over the bed, bitch.” he commanded, giving her ass one last slap.

She nodded, getting up onto fawn-like legs that made the men around her laugh as she stumbled over to the bed. She started to bend over so she could grab onto the sheets, but was momentarily stopped by a perfectly unsoldierlike hand. Les’ hand.

“Nuh uh uh,” he wagged his finger at her, “Not quite yet.”

Les took a seat right in the spot that she was about to bend over, stroking himself back to full mast.

“Now go ahead,” he waved to her aristocratically, a gesture that just seemed absurd when done next to his own desperately pumping hand.

She did as told, bending over Les’s hips, registering out of the corner of her eyes that Tophel was hurrying onto the bed next to him, getting himself into prime tit-grabbing position.

And then Melphi saddled up behind her, the thick hairs of his bare thighs rubbing against her own. 

The gang's all here, she thought bitterly. All except Maugor of course.

Faust gasped out as Melphi pushed his cock roughly against her clit, giving Les the prime opening to pull her down onto his own dick. She moaned deep around him as Melphi rubbed the tip of his cock up and down the length of her pussy, coating himself, coaxing her.

It felt good, great even. The greatest she’d felt with any of these three. Although of course, nowhere near as close as she’d felt with Maugor…

No! She scolded herself. No, those thoughts needed to stop. After all, he could barely even look at her anymore. Any chance they may have had of being together had been shattered. He had been shattered. And that was a good thing, the best thing even. It was what she wanted! She needed to focus on what she always wanted.

She pulled herself off of Les so that she could beg, “Come on, please.”

Melphi cocked a brow at what in another tone of voice could be mistaken for a command. But he’d let that slide, given the circumstances.

“Oh, you want it that bad huh?” he grinned, swirling the head of his dick around her clit, “Some nice, good human cock.”

“Y-Yes, please,” she gasped.

Melphi chuckled, pulling his dick slowly one last time up the back of her pussy, and further still, until it was nestled right in at the pucker of her asshole.

“As you wish.”

Hours later, the room was still. Not particularly silent though, as the Guardsmen she’d laid with all seemed to have a nasty snoring problem. (Yes, even the fucking elf).

But that wasn’t a problem. The deeper they slept, the easier this’d be.

She opened up Captain Melphi’s satchel. Like the others, there hadn’t been any big or exciting treasures. Just way too many bills and coins than any person with a brain should be carrying around, especially when they’d be leaving their coin purses out amongst strangers. 

And also like the others, she didn’t take all of it. Only about a quarter, a pretty new chunk of change, but not enough for Melphi to immediately notice. This was maybe the sleaziest part of her routine, she’d admit, but how else was she supposed to get money to live off of?

It’s not like the King paid demons like her.

Faust stood up, her spoils thrown over her shoulder in her own satchel. She made her way to the exit, not bothering to look back. After all, what would she even find? Everyone was knocked out.

“Is that what all this was for then?”

She froze.

Everyone except him.

Faust turned back, locking eyes with Maugor who sat up in his bed across the room. His stare was hard, hateful. Just like all the others. 

And it broke her heart.

She hardened her own resolve, staring back at him just as coldly.

“It was.”

“All of it?” he breathed.

“Yes.”

Maugor shook his head, clearly brokenhearted, but more than anything disgusted. It was a look that she hated to see on his sweet porcelain face. It truly didn’t belong there. 

“Are you gonna turn me in?”

He tsked, amazed that after everything that was happening here, that was all that she had to say.

“Just get out,” he growled, “You’re not worth the trouble.”

Faust smiled, a sad desolate smile she was sure that he would interpret as taunting, “I’m glad you realized that.”

Maugor just waved her out of the room, paying no mind to the treasures she’d collected. Let her have them. Let her have them for her sick, silly, pathetic demon life. 

And so she left.

She made her way out of the room, out of the tavern. Through the empty streets back to her little closet of a room in the military barracks. 

Feeling just a bit emptier than when she went in.