#and then when hes finally saved from it.. its by the very person who betrayed him.

[iregretdoing]

"You belong to me."

"Those who die on the battlefield are not royalty, nobility, or commoners. They are the defeated, who die."

"I feel no responsibility to comrades who've lost lives under my command. Because they chose to fight in each battle.. Just as I chose this. But if there is something that... I can do for them. Something I can do for the dead... Then it is to win. I must keep winning to attain my dream. To realize my dream, I will perch on top of their corpses.. It is a blood-smeared dream, after all. I don't regret or feel guilty about it."

"Do I need to give you a reason each time I risk my life for your sake?"

"While many can pursue their dreams in solitude, other dreams are like great storms blowing hundreds, even thousands of dreams apart in their wake. Dreams breathe life into men and can cage them in suffering. Men live and die by their dreams. But long after they have been abandoned they still smolder deep in men's hearts. Some see nothing more than life and death. They are dead, for they have no dreams."

"In this world, some people born are like keys that move the world and exist having no connection to the social hierarchy established by man."

"It is my perception, that a true friend never relies on another's dream. A person with the potential to be my true friend, must be able to find his reason for life without my help. And, he would have to put his heart and soul into protecting his dream. He would never hesitate to fight for his dream, even against me. For me, a true friend is one who stands equal on those terms."

Among thousands of comrades and ten thousand enemies, only you... only you made me forget everything that I wanted.

"I'd dream, that on nights of the full moon, I'd become a small child and find myself embraced with a nostalgic warmth... But... When I wake from the dream... All that remains is a vague sense of longing...

And that, too, soon fades away - along with a single tear, like morning dew."

[traeumenvonbuechern]

🐉 Dragon Books To Read If You Liked "Fourth Wing" by Rebecca Yarros 🐉

The dragon romantasy "Fourth Wing" by Rebecca Yarros has taken over the bookish community, so I wanted to give you some recommendations on what to read after you finished it.

Dragonfall by L.R. Lam

Long ago, humans betrayed dragons, stealing their magic and banishing them to a dying world. Centuries later, their descendants worship dragons as gods. But the 'gods' remember, and they do not forgive. Since they were orphaned, Arcady has scraped a living thieving on the streets of Vatra, dreaming of life among the nobility - and revenge. When the chance arises to steal a powerful artefact from the bones of the Plaguebringer, the most hated person in Lumet history, they jump at it, for its magic holds the key to their dreams. But the spell has unintended consequences, and drags Everen - the last male dragon, who was once foretold to save his kind - into the human world. Trapped, and disguised as a human, Everen soon realises that the key to his destiny, and to regaining his true power, lies in Arcady. All he needs to do is convince one little thief to bond with him completely - body, mind, and soul - and then kill them . . . Yet the closer the two become, the greater the risk both their worlds will shatter.

To Shape a Dragon's Breath by Moniquill Blackgoose

A young Indigenous woman enters a colonizer-run dragon academy—and quickly finds herself at odds with the “approved” way of doing things—in the first book of this brilliant new fantasy series. The remote island of Masquapaug has not seen a dragon in many generations—until fifteen-year-old Anequs finds a dragon’s egg and bonds with its hatchling. Her people are delighted, for all remember the tales of the days when dragons lived among them and danced away the storms of autumn, enabling the people to thrive. To them, Anequs is revered as Nampeshiweisit—a person in a unique relationship with a dragon. Unfortunately for Anequs, the Anglish conquerors of her land have different opinions. They have a very specific idea of how a dragon should be raised, and who should be doing the raising—and Anequs does not meet any of their requirements. Only with great reluctance do they allow Anequs to enroll in a proper Anglish dragon school on the mainland. If she cannot succeed there, her dragon will be killed. For a girl with no formal schooling, a non-Anglish upbringing, and a very different understanding of the history of her land, challenges abound—both socially and academically. But Anequs is smart, determined, and resolved to learn what she needs to help her dragon, even if it means teaching herself. The one thing she refuses to do, however, is become the meek Anglish miss that everyone expects. Anequs and her dragon may be coming of age, but they’re also coming to power, and that brings an important realization: the world needs changing—and they might just be the ones to do it.

She Who Earned Her Wings by Vaela Denarr & Micah Iannandrea

One does not learn to fly without taking a leap. And one has to fall to be caught. Nomi is a young druid finally taking the chance to spread her wings and leave her home. To see the world and discover its magic, beauty… and maybe love. Calia is a dragon on the hunt for angels, trying to square an old debt. That, and to get Laura, her desired bondmate, to finally return to her side, where she belongs. Nomi immediately catches the eye of the powerful dragons. Calia entices her with honeyed words and a skillful tongue. On the other hand, Laura, much smaller but equally intimidating, takes it upon herself to protect her. Despite the warnings, Nomi can’t help being drawn to Calia's charm, her power, her fangs… and the hidden gentleness in her eyes. She promises danger where Laura promises safety, and Nomi is torn between the two. Luckily there is a convenient cult out for the dragons’ heads, providing Nomi with ample distraction and at least one dragon egg to steal, hatch, and raise by herself. Perfectly normal things for a young transgender druid to get involved in! In the clutches of dragons, battling dark forces from beyond the stars, Nomi faces the questions of who she is and who she wants to be. Whether she deserves the love offered to her, and what it truly takes to earn her wings...

[ecoamerica]

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

[whoistrash]

Why change matters and how Amphibia did it better than The Owl House.

"Watching and Dreaming" made me cry a lot during its premiere. I was amazed and, I'd say, dazed by it. Then I forgot about it for a while. Now I finished re-watching Amphibia for the first time since TOH ended. My hype died down, and I have some thoughts. A lot, actually.

Amphibia's ending was incredibly painful and made me sob like a baby for two whole weeks the first time I watched it. That's because it was not only beautiful and heartbreaking, but truly GOOD. Brilliant, actually. I absolutely agree with a statement that any other ending would literally be a contradiction to the whole main plot, especially Anne's arc. The girls had to learn to let go in order to grow as individuals - the thing they had the biggest problem with. Saying goodbye was the only logical option, plot-wise. It still hurt like hell, though. Separating the multidimensional, against-all-odds relationships (especially my beloved spranne. Ouch, ouch, ouch). The Owl House does no such thing - everybody stays together. They live happily ever after.

Paradoxically, I think that it's the main reason why I'd choose "The Hardest Thing" over "Watching and Dreaming" every single time. I know we shouldn't really compare them in EVERY aspect, since TOH had way more things to deal with in the final episode, but the fact that Luz got to not only stay, but to freely travel between worlds as she pleases really took the whole "growing up and finding your true self no matter what the other people do/say about you" thing out the door. Luz from season one, episode one, and Luz from the finale are not really that different. Well, she certainly became more traumatised and depressed than before, but in terms of personal growth? Nope. Luz - from the very beginning - was cheerful, open, caring and very selfless, willing to literally help every stranger she met no matter how it would affect her. She had little to no boundaries, but, well, you can't argue that she was A GOOD, SELFLESS PERSON. Now, we could say that her arc here would be learning that sometimes you should put yourself before others, that you can't save everyone, that you can't trust every person you meet. And she learns it! She fucking does! She helps Philip not knowing who he will become, and then suffers from the consequences, because she helped the wrong person. And then it's all erased, when she saves Collector's life and meets Papa Titan (or whatever we call them).

I have so much to say about this. All of TOH's "villains" (Amity, Lilith, Hunter, The Collector) that were given a redemption arc literally get turned into lifeless, edgy trauma dumpsters, that suddenly loose all of their previous character, quirks and sass (well, maybe except for Lilith, she just started to express them differently, I think, but still, it was WAY too big of a change). I won't dwell on it (since many, many fans called it out already - as they should), and will focus on something different. The only one marked as irredeemable is Belos. Good. Okay. He's irredeemable, because he's a white, christian puritan who won't listen to anyone but himself. Also a genocidal maniac. That's the lesson for Luz here. "You can't save everyone. Some people are just straight up evil". And it's very, very true. But.

From all of the "villains" I mentioned before, Belos is the one that had the most reasons to, let's say, take a dark turn. Those reasons are what makes him irredeemable - he's just too convinced he's right, because, in his mind, he has evidence to prove it. But how do we learn about this? Maybe by seeing his part of the story? Maybe by learning about his brother and Evelyn, about their relationship? It couldn't be straight up awful, since Philip literally brought his brother back to life over and over again, he wanted his brother, or at least the picture of Caleb that satisfied him the most. There was more to it than only "you betrayed me and now I will hate you forever". Do we get to see any of that? No. Instead we get an all-knowing, all-doing being that literally choose Luz as "the one" for being kind and trusting, that convinces her that Belos is, indeed, a lost cause. Do you see where I'm going with this?

Luz, the person that on the literal episode two was told that there is no such thing as a "chosen one" and that she can't always hop into action to save everybody, because, it's, well, not always possible, DOES EXACTLY THAT in the finale by taking a bullet for The Collector, the, you know, very freshly redeemed and suddenly cute and funky villain, whom Luz trusts immediately. AND SHE IS REWARDED FOR IT BY BEING MADE THE CHOSEN ONE. BY A GOD-LIKE BEING THAT CLAIMS TO BE ALL-KNOWING AND CAN DECIDE WHO IS RIGHT AND WHO IS WRONG, BECAUSE OF PERSONAL (King) REASONS. Just like, you know... Belos? The irredeemable villain? And then Luz lets go of the moral dilemmas that's been keeping her up at night for the past months, makes up her mind, defeats the bad guy, learns nothing, and gets to stay in the Boiling Isles and on Earth. With her beautifully redeemed girlfriend and friends whom she kept secrets from and lied to out of fear of being ostracised (you see the pattern here, right?) for, again, months.

I love Amphibia. I love The Owl House. But Amphibia handles it's "villains", generally wronged characters and the whole change/no change thing way better. Well, maybe besides the Core - they got a bit wasted in my opinion. But still. Sasha. Grime. Marcy. Andrias. Anne herself. They learn and change. And more importantly, they face consequences and come to understand and accept them. There's no "chosen one" here. Anne gets the proposition because she's the first one to use the music box for good in literal millenia. A fact, plain and simple (not an opinion based on personal motivations), that makes sense plot-wise, and adds so, so much to Anne's arc. Because Anne from season one, episode one wouldn't care. The one from the finale cares very damn much. And that's the biggest difference.

Saying goodbye makes the message way stronger. The more I think about it, however, the more I'm starting to be afraid that there's no The Message in The Owl House to begin with. Luz learns very little, yet ends up with everything she ever wanted. There's no power behind it. The "find the right people and choose to trust them, not everyone will be your friend" and "some things are out of your control, some people are just bad" aspect is even weaker, as proven by basically the whole season 3. I will end it by my favorite quote from Amphibia, that I think about on daily basis. Have a good day, y'all.

"Change can be difficult, but it's how we grow. It can be the hardest thing to realize you can't hold on to something forever. Sometimes, you have to let it go; but, of the things you let go, you'd be surprised what makes its way back to you."

[chadillacboseman]

Las Almas Blues

Pairing: Alejandro Vargas x F!Reader

Warnings: Mentions of injury, the military industrial complex, etc. We all know what MW2 is about at this point. Alejandro being a big ass softie.

Summary: Post MWII. Alejandro has had his ass kicked, been betrayed, lost at least one squadmate, and finally took down the woman who has caused all of the bloodshed in his beloved Las Almas. There's only one person he looks to for comfort in the aftermath.

Word Count: Very short. Call it an exercise in getting back into the groove I guess.

A/N: Some use of Spanish language, translations provided at the bottom. NO mention of reader's skin, hair, or eye color. Reader does also speak a lil Spanish.

--

Every inch of Alejandro's body ached as if he'd been run through a meat grinder. Bruises and burns that had gone unnoticed before suddenly throbbed now that the surge of adrenaline had left his muscles.

"Oye hermano- " Rudy peered through the rear view mirror when they hit another bump that sent Alejandro into a fit of animated groans, "¿Estás bien?"

"Estoy bien. Just get me home."

Rudy grunted in response and directed the SUV down a darkened street that wound its way out of Las Almas and into the mountains that surrounded it.

The house was tucked just beyond a range of steep peaks that reached for the sky, their black, jagged edges just barely visible against the deep blue above them. Alejandro had known the house as a child- the former home of an American painter who had been scared off by the cartel violence that threatened to encroach upon his front yard.

But it never did.

It was why he had chosen this place to hide you- to keep you distant from the violence and the bloodshed he saw every day. To give you some sense of normalcy behind the suspiciously tall fence and armed Vaqueros that lined the property.

Rudy signaled to one of the men at the gate and jerked his head toward the rear of the vehicle.

"Bienvenido, jefe," the guard glanced in the back seat and Alejandro offered him a nod in return.

--

From upstairs, you watched the lights of the SUV as they turned through the gate and came to a stop in the driveway. One of the back doors opened and a figure that was unmistakably Alejandro's stumbled out, hunched over as if in pain.

"Alejo-" you breathed his name and bolted for the stairs, taking them two at a time until you reached the foyer. You waited, fingers wringing in worry until the front door opened and he stumbled through.

"Vida mia-" Alejandro practically collapsed into your arms and you took a few steps backward as his weight fell against you and his heavy gear bags dropped to the floor, "te he extrañado."

"¿Qué pasó?" You pulled back to examine his face- he looked exhausted, every line seemed etched into his skin as if into a granite slab.

How could he possibly begin to explain his week to you?

"Hey, we caught El Sin Nombre- turns out it was an old squadmate-"

"Rudy almost died in a burning building, but he drove me home."

"We saved the US from a missile strike."

"A lot," was all he could muster, so you left it at that. You'd seen him bloodier than this more times than you liked to think about, but never had you seen him so utterly exhausted.

"Come upstairs."

Alejandro took your hand and followed you up the stairs to the master bathroom where he perched himself on the edge of the bathtub. His head throbbed in the brightness there- a new, sharper pain that shot down his jawline with every movement.

"Here," you pressed a cool cloth to his forehead and he leaned into it, his eyes squeezed shut against the ache. His head came to a rest against your midriff and you chuckled, running your fingers through his tousled black hair, "You going to live?"

"Maybe," he murmured against the fabric of your sweater, "Maybe not."

You pulled his head back gently and he grinned weakly up at you, his soft eyes glinting in the bathroom light. The grin faded when he spoke again.

"I almost died out there," Alejandro's eyes darkened for a moment as his mind wandered to the way Rodriguez's body had tumbled from the cliffside, lifeless into the ravine below, "I lost a good man, too."

"Alejo," he hummed in response to the nickname, something so personal, something he held so dear when you spoke it, "When will you give this up?"

You had asked him that question a thousand times.

Through tears, through screams, while squeezing his hand at his bedside. Time and time again, he had told you that Las Almas needed him- that he couldn't abandon the good people of the city like a dog with its tail between its legs.

But now? Now Valeria was behind bars, maybe even permanently. Los Vaqueros were back on top despite their losses, and for once, Alejandro felt as if maybe he could give it up.

"Would that make you happy, mi amor?" he rose to his feet and clasped your hands in his, "You want this old man to hang it up?"

You laughed, the first genuine laugh you'd had since he had been gone with the American taskforce. It made his heart sing to hear it, to see your face light up as it broke open into a bright smile.

Rudy could take the helm- he was more than capable of continuing Los Vaqueros without Alejandro.

Since the day he had first met you, he'd dreamed of giving you the life you deserved- one that wasn't fraught with worry or tinged with loneliness when he had to be away.

Because God, he loved you. He loved everything about you. He wanted you to be happy in ways he wasn't even sure he could make you-

But he could try.

And he would try every day of his life until he succeeded.

--

--

TRANSLATIONS:

Oye hermano. ¿Estás bien? - Hey Brother, you alright?

Estoy bien - I'm good/I'm fine.

Bienvenido, jefe - Welcome, boss.

Vida mia, te he extrañado - my life, I've missed you.

mi amor - my love

[karmarox]

Kallamar the Coward

Thinking about Kallamar in Cult of the Lamb, with how the lore and even his own siblings taunt him for being a coward and he even tries to bargain and sway you away from getting your revenge and killing him, even ready to throw Shamura under the bus to save himself, but then when you finally push him into a corner and he's forced to fight he not only busts out a bunch of weapons and starts quad-wielding them but he was once regarded by the fandom as being among the hardest bosses of the base game.

It got me thinking, was he always like this? Narinder certainly thinks so, but there's bias there. It's easy to just write him off as always being a mess like this...

But there's no denying he's the second in power after Shamura, Anchordeep is known for its beauty, he takes personal pride in the way he took care of his cult/area, and when in Purgatory out of all the bishops he's notably the most lucid/aware of where he is.

So I present this: After Narinder's sealing, Shamura was in no state to lead or give orders. The Bishops all had massive injuries that refused to heal. Who out of the 4 would immediately be assumed to be the one to take a leadership role? Who had comparatively more "manageable" injuries to take care of the other 3? And who would you assume is most likely to have medical experience to at least try to lessen the impact of all of their wounds?

Kallamar, Pestilence and Cure.

Early on after The One Who Waits was sealed away, Kallamar would have had to effectively take over the Old Faith while also caring for a broken beyond repair older sibling, who had always been the "Wise" one that the others blindly followed, yet was now barely even there at the best of times, and two younger siblings, one who was now permanently blind (and young/weak enough that they couldn't even muster a single Curse towards the Lamb before being crushed within days of their resurrection even years after the sealing, so just imagine how new to godhood they were back when this all started), and another who had had her throat torn out, all while downplaying his own wounds.

What if, then, at some point, he simply broke?

He resents Shamura, even potentially sincerely blames them for causing the entire thing (which Shamura confesses to), both leading them to turn on Narinder and also for leading everyone to killing the Lambs. He's still fond of Leshy, but from how quick to take charge Heket is, it's clear that after he proved unable to take the stress of it all, she was next in line as the "leader" of The Old Faith. There's gotta be some resentment there on both ends because of that, particularly with how quick he is to criticize how she took care of her territory.

And then compare how he is as a bishop to how he is as a follower. I think it's very very interesting that he goes from a dirty coward and absolute pathetic mess of anxiety and fear, to pleading directly to his own executioner for help, to being almost perfectly happy and content to simply be a Follower of the Lamb's cult. The others (minus Shamura, due to their condition) are resentful and quick to give sharp words to the Lamb, but Kallamar? It's like all his anxiety is gone with his godhood. He has nothing to fear anymore, and is almost ridiculously quick to be friendly to the Lamb and share his tastes in decor and pride in appearances with them. Not even in the "kissing up" way, he talks like they're equals. Is this what Kallamar was like, before everything? Is he actually HAPPIER as a Mortal now that all of the responsibility and fear of death is gone? Even secretly grateful?

There's no denying his cowardice. There's no denying it crossed a line when he was ready to betray Shamura when his nerves reached their limit. There's no denying that as much as he'd like to believe that he is absolved of guilt for The Old Faith's sins simply because he was just doing what Shamura told him to even if he claims he thought it was a bad idea.

But you also have to wonder what caused that cowardice to form, and what other feelings motivate his actions besides fear.

(tldr: sad squid was not ready to become the responsible one, especially not after going deaf and being traumatized. Has a mental breakdown halfway through raising the others due to not being able to actually deal with going deaf or being traumatized because it turns out being the god of physical health is different from mental health. Little sister ends up having to step up and be the mom now. Their relationship never recovered because of it, and he now blames the eldest for failing them and also for his own failures to cope. As a bonus developed an attachment to his own killer out of some weird warped perception of them "rescuing" him from his stress and then from death itself.)

[nteabodies]

Qui gon has a space youtube channel where he uploads videos of cool plants and reviews books on space botany with the occasional random footage of jedi stuff. The content is either very dry or very chaotic with shaky cam and somewhat blurry footage.

He made the account when he was a padawan after Dooku (nursing a headache from Qui Gon's latest hyperfixation) wearily asked him to channel his love for plants somewhere else at least until this migraine subsides, padawan

He realises that he actually loves making videos and chatting endlessly to a camera. His first few videos end up being 3 to 4 hours long and focuses on obscure plants and random books he found in Dookus room

The jedi Council is a little illiterate when it comes to social media (it hasnt caused any problems for the order yet so its pretty much unregulated) so QuiGon isn't actually breaking any rules when he posts videos without making them private. Many jedi do have social media accounts but they tend to use it for more professional purposes, so Qui Gon's channel slips under the radar with an average of like 5 views per video.

He continues using the channel as a botany/cute animals/philosophy/ranting outlet throughout his apprenticeship.

Once he's knighted he has less time to upload videos so his most common type of videos end up being those 20 second to 1 minute clips ft. Something Funny or Something Cool or just blurry footage with unintelligible audio.

Ofc when he gets padawans, he also posts random vids of them when he catches them in 4k doing sth stupid/cute.

By the time obi wan comes around, qui gon's space youtube channel has like, 50 short videos of feemor and xanatos doing things like petting tookas, failing spectacularly at executing a flashy ataru form, being sappy while high on painkillers, running away from qui gon as he holds a flesh-eating parasite towards them and shouts 'why are you running?' etc etc

At this point he has about 20 or so regular viewers who either think he's roleplaying a jedi or are members of the jedi order who find it hilarious (mainly Qui-Gon's friends and, for some reason, Master Yoda)

Anw the point of this is to lead to the premise of one of his videos going viral during the clone wars (possibly the one of general kenobi when he was 14 doing a backflip and landing on his face. Or the one of him sleeping while half his body is dangling outside a window. Or the one where he does this).

It's good PR for the jedi bc it shows them as slightly chaotic but peaceful people who are at their core just like everyone else (idiots).

It's memed to the extent that it reaches the eyes of the Jedi Council and Anakin who immediately like brings it to obi wan like "Master is this really you??"

Obi Wan randomly discovering this treasure trove of videos that shows so much of the person his master used to be, missing his dad so much but at the same time feeling a little betrayed that Qui Gon uploaded such embarrassing videos to a public forum where anyone could view it: you are haunting me from beyond the grave master

And the channel has both clips of Qui Gon and Obi wan as padawans, so there would definitely be fan compilation videos comparing their feral padawan energy. Obi Wan feels seen bc no one used to believe him when he told them that calm Master Jinn was actually crazier than him but now he finally has proof but then angst bc Qui Gon is not there so he can't rub his face in it :(

Anakin and ahsoka discovering that their cool and calm master used to be wilder and more feral than them before qui gon died and left him to raise a child: that's actually very sad.

The general public seeing Dooku in the bg of qui gon's padawan videos: is General Kenobi... fighting a war... against his jedi grandpa?

Anw this can go two ways: either this is just a cute thing that happened during the clone wars and everything else happened the same as canon OR it inadvertently saves the galaxy

Canon: the videos make everyone involved Feel Things but don't change their actions. The empire never gets around to banning the channel so Obi wan uses it as one of his last sources of comfort in the desert as he watches over luke. Once he reconnects with Qui-Gon's force ghost, they bond by watching old videos from the channel. Years later, Luke discovers Obi Wans old datapad and inadvertently finds out about the original viral video and the channel. It ends up being a very good reference for painting a picture of jedi life pre-empire. Luke uses it as a reference when building his jedi academy but not before spending a solid hour laughing at the padawan kenobi fail compilations

AU:

Dooku watching some of the videos and all the fluff (and possibly seeing the vlog where padawan qui gon talks about the differences between attachments and love with regards to jedi and bringing up his bond with dooku): Actually maybe I can leave the jedi order and make positive change without becoming a sith lord. Maybe I can help the jedi order without agreeing with everything they do.

Anakin watching the same video on attachments vs love and going to obi wan

Anakin: Do you love me master?

Obi wan: ???

Obi wan: You are my brother anakain??? Of course I love you??? But why are you asking me?? Are you okay?? Do you have something to confess perhaps?? Like about a senator?? A senator that has a name beginning with a p??

Anakin, panicking: Ah yes p-pa-palpatine did tell me a strange story about a wise sith lord when we went for our weekly bonding session yesterday

Obi wan: I -

Obi wan: I meant your marriage to Padme actually but wtf there is a lot to unpack there.

And anakin is just reeling from the fact that

1) obi wan loves him

2) obi wan knew about padme and didn't say anything

So he doesn't get angery when Obi wan brings the palpy matter to the jedi Council and investigates him. Then add in a few well-timed coincidences bc this is a fix it and yay palpy overthrown!!

Anakin prolly voluntarily leaves the order and becomes a happy trophy husband for Padme after a long talk with Obi wan about his future where he reevaluates his life decisions. ("Anakin you will be my brother whether or not you're in the order")

Obi wan meets Qui Gons force ghost and does get to rub it in his face that he was a less feral padawan than Qui Gon.

And they all lived happily ever after except palpatine who died angrily ever after.

[vickyvicarious]

The whole scene building to this is fascinating to me. First Albert specifically asks his old friend to protect his invention no matter what, even saying, "I'll cooperate. I'll do whatever you say. I swear it." Barok pauses a moment, before pointing out that means Albert has just confessed. And when Ryunosuke tries to deny it, he takes a moment to very pointedly spell out exactly what that will mean: if Ryunosuke argues that the experiment was a hoax, then the invention will no longer be protected. If he admits to the murder, the invention will be kept safe.

This puts Ryunosuke on the spot, as he struggles with protecting his client legally, or obeying his stated wishes to protect his invention instead. As he points out, "(Either way, I can't avoid betraying his trust...)" This is a really interesting reversal of the way Ryunosuke himself has been betrayed by his clients in the past. With McGilded, he did his utmost to protect his client with all the knowledge he had at his disposal, despite some doubts. Later it was revealed that he had successfully freed a guilty man. (Not that he even made it out of the courtroom thanks to Graydon, but still.) And with Gina, he had to struggle to prove himself worthy of her trust before she would cooperate with him. In both cases, trust between a lawyer and their client was key. Here again that theme rears its head as he finds himself forced to betray his client's trust.

It takes Susato's arrival to (literally!) flip Ryunosuke's thinking around, from dwelling on how no matter what he must lose something... to instead focusing on what, then, he can still save.

(Sidenote - I fucking adore Susato.)

It's only with this perspective that he is no longer paralyzed by the choice, and can openly speak to Albert about the reality of the situation. He establishes their common ground as people who seek the truth, and is able to snap Albert out of his denial about his experiment.

It's a big moment for the both of them. Until Albert admits to remembering something relevant, implicitly agreeing to let Ryunosuke continue in his defense, things come almost to a head in a way that reminds me of Phoenix's choice in 2-5, when he must decide whether to send an innocent person to jail, or stay dedicated to the truth and lose Maya. Obviously, this is a little less personal, and less openly life and death, but it has a similar gravity in that it is a choice that would dictate Ryunosuke's path forward as a lawyer. Luckily, Albert does come to his senses enough that Ryunosuke doesn't actually have to betray him, but his determination to do so in order to save his life over his faked invention cements his own choice to dedicate himself to the truth. And I love that he is able to do so with Albert's acceptance, with common ground established, because it means he is able to keep that trust between lawyer and client here.

...So, big moment for Ryunosuke!

But we can't forget Van Zieks here.

When Albert has his breakdown about his experiment being tampered with, Barok's reaction is to say, "...So...you've finally opened your eyes." He then says those lines up top. He calls Albert by name as he says he "can't ignore this any longer." It's a moment of what seems like surprising vulnerability, or at the least Barok is expressing emotional openness in a way completely unfamiliar to Ryunosuke and Susato. And then, before the end of the trial for the day, Barok again asks Albert point-blank if he is giving up on protecting his invention. The Professor agrees, and apologizes. Maybe to the court for wasting their time, but... more likely to his old friend.

It seems a lot like Barok was deliberately leading this whole conversation to force Ryunosuke into making that exact choice here, with the hopes of getting Albert to face the truth. As soon as he was asked to protect the invention over his friend's life, he started being very blunt about what that would mean. He repeatedly established what was being officially said, and whether or not the prosecution would have Harebrayne's consent to submit the paperwork, or whether Ryunosuke would take the official position to call out the faked experiment. I definitely get the vibe that he wanted things to turn out this way for the sake of his friend. He didn't want Albert to throw his life away for something that in all likelihood wasn't even real.

...At the same time, though, I feel like he may be playing to an audience at the end here. There is definitely the sense that Barok's superiors (Stronghart) want to learn all the details of the invention and want to be able to seize it for their own purposes. By the end of this conversation, he has that permission. I think probably he would have gotten it in one way or another regardless. I also think that he is going to continue to try just as hard to get Albert convicted. But now he is able to do both with the same understanding that he established when he visited him in his cell before the trial, that this is him doing his duty and is something Albert doesn't blame him for. Both prosecuting him, and inspecting his invention. It's his own way of maintaining that trust in their friendship even as they stand on opposing sides.

[necrophilemagpie]

Alucard characterization headcanons and Why exactly making Seras a vampire was something he felt the need to do. And why she felt the need to resist it so much.

So, here's the big one that p much drives my personal characterization of him

He's not some sort of just-because devil figure that 'corrupts people for the fun of it i guess.' No, his reasons for doing what he does are deeply painfully personal and informed shamelessly by his own trauma and things He wanted back before he lacked power.

Oh and wanting to justify himself and that pesky thing called being afraid to be alone.

"I wish everyone that's hurt me ever died a painful gory death" is something a lot of people feel, but he makes the assumption that it's something people also want to Act on. He did.

How Exactly he became Dracula is not known, but it is strongly implied something happened and he Gave Himself that kind of power through the rage he felt.

And then the dynamic flipped. He became a powerful feared warlord, he was in a position where, if he so wished anyone that as much as looked at him wrong could be easily be rid of forever in a matter of minutes or seconds.

He also got to know all too well when he was defeated just exactly how painful it was to be powerless again, though not entirely this time, by comparison it must've Felt exactly like coming back to being a scared kid.

Especially having been betrayed further, and, as far as he knew, being tossed to that basement to the end of time, unable to even move, until Integra found him.

And in his mind, not only did she Save him, she saved him By Giving Him Power again.

And he wants to replicate that feeling, that exhilaration of being granted power to... honestly just reach the absolute safety of being the scariest thing around really.

He saw Seras and realized, maybe, just maybe thats someone thats kind of like him, maybe that's someone that Could Be Like him, maybe if he gives her what he previously mustered for himself, and what Integra gave him

finally, finally somebody will understand him. Finally he can justify who he is by saying 'look! here's someone, here's someone who thought the same!' that he's not a monster, or at least not that much of a monster, or at least that being a monster is a normal, reasonable thing to be.

Trouble is, Seras, no doubt growing up with no real support as an extremely traumatized, and, honestly, likely autistic child knows something about the human world he might've forgotten about.

And that something is, that outliers are not Welcome in the world, that the world is Always bigger, that being visibly hurt is Dangerous and that lashing out will get you in deep shit and it's best to not give anyone reasons to notice.

She's not just a bubbly girl simply to be cute I guess, the girl is masking.

Oh but she no longer lives in the human world. And to him it's weakness, to him it's bullshit. To him it's Seras digging her own grave.

He doesn't quite get at first that she doesn't just cling to humanity because change is scary, but because her humanity has been The One Thing she's had to protect herself with. And Acting Like A Normal Human was her one defense against being neglected and othered more than she already was.

It did literally take the human world visibly crumbling around her for Seras to realize, wait, that's not, that's not as real or as powerful a structure as she thought and it wont even apply to her anymore once its back.

And likely shocked as he was, that Seras turned out a very different kind of monster from him, Alucard, nonetheless, got something much better than he bargained for. Not a copy or a follower. An equal.

[aro-laurance-zvahl]

I know nobody asked but fuck it I slept and shit and am still thinking about it so like. Here’s why I hate Garroth’s betrayal arc, and what I would do instead!

Mind control is STUPID

I know some of what I’m gonna say is gonna be able to be countered with the whole implied mind control stuff. And yeah sure if he’s being mind controlled anything can happen! But also? Mind control is a stupid plot device. If the only way you think you can get a character to do the thing you want them to do, is to inflict them to mind control/corruption for multiple days or even weeks, then maybe it’s time to reconsider the plot point.

(This post is long so I’m putting a keep reading)

It’s out of character

It just makes no sense for Garroth to betray not just Aphmau, but Phoenix Drop as a whole. It’s established very early on, and is pounded in after this betrayal, that one of his most core traits is loyalty. It’s his fatal flaw! It prevents him from really trying to kill Zenix back when he attacked Phoenix Drop.

But then he sees Aphmau kissing Laurance and that Laurance broke their bro code...and oh man....he’s just gonna betray his home for fucking O’KHASIS cause of that. Screw loyalty I guess!

It’s start of the end

By this I mean it’s the start of some characters being boiled down to their attraction to Aphmau.

Suddenly Garroth’s fatal flaw isn’t loyalty, it’s Aphmau. He’ll betray the home he stood by even when shit went down the drain and their lord was dead and roads were falling apart, cause his crush likes someone else. He’ll help O’Khasis and the brother who has murdered entire villages cause of that. Cause that’s all that fuels good ol’ Garroth, his massive crush on Aphmau! Not a sense of justice or guilt from his past or anything of that nature. Just Aphmau.

Had very little lasting impact

And I know that sounds weird cause like yeah it did it changed the course of the whole story but like. It did a few things, but none of them have to do with the act of betrayal. Basically if Zane and Lillian did it all on their own and then Garroth stayed because that is in character at least, the few things that had a lasting impact would still happen

The 15 year time skip

Garroth is not in the overworld

Making the Divine Warriors important to their goals

Giving Aphmau Irene powers

Killing off Aaron

And that is about it. Dynamics with Garroth didn’t change, no one seemed to see him differently, he wasn’t even the focus when he finally got saved which leads me to my next point!

Him getting saved wasn’t about him!

Garroth got saved, he’s finally home, you the viewer who has been watching this shit unfold live are so excited and can’t wait to see the reactions- but wait.

Sure, Garroth is finally safe. Sure, he’s finally home. But...but Aaron is dead. Aphmau notices Aaron is dead, and that is what this arc is about. Not Garroth coming to grips with the world he reenters, finally seeing how unkind fifteen years have been because of his actions. Not about friends finally seeing him afger fifteen years, not about the friends he saved who know he also betrayed them having a swirl of conflicted but overall relieved emotions. No, it’s not about any of that. What it is about is Aaron’s death and Aphmau’s grief of it.

It was Aaron that sacrificed himself to do it

Aaron didn’t know Garroth. I don’t think the two ever actually talked, and sure it’s clear Aaron didn’t do it for Garroth. He did it to kill Zane and also. For Aphmau. (Remember that point about some characters getting boiled down to their attraction to her and that taking over character motivations? I think that applies here.)

Its just such a missed opportunity honestly. If someone dies to save him, Garroth should feel some personal grief! The person should have personal attachments to Garroth! Make it Laurance! Make it Dante! Make it Vylad! Make it fucking Azura! Not someone who Garroth will go “Oh. Who is that again?”

What I would do

My personal favorite way to change this arc while keeping those first four major impacts, is for it to be Aphmau’a icarus moment. It goes a bit like this

Garroth has just been approached by Zane and Lillian, he is sat in his room and filled with some sort of panic. They have some sort of plan, a plan he knows will not lead to good things for Phoenix Drop or Aphmau. The kiss he saw is barley on his mind because this takes priority. He has to tell Aphmau, as soon as possible but he knows now is not safe. He knows they must be stalking outside, keeping an eye out to make sure he doesn’t warn anyone.

That’s when he sees it, a deep purple enchanted amulet secured to a similarly enchanted golden cord. He doesn’t hesitate in grabbing it, whispering a plea in hopes Aphmau still has hers. And she does. He’s able to tell her all about how Zane is here and scheming something and how he’s trying to use him to get it but that means they can stop him before anything has the chance to start, plan an ambush or something of the like.

Except Aphmau sees opportunity. She sees a way into Zane’s plans, into his resources, it’s a perfect opportunity. Not only to stop his plans, but to learn what they are. Maybe even use them for good! Garroth just has to go along with it.

Of course he’s hesitant, the last thing he ever wants to put Phoenix Drop in danger, but he trusts Aphmau and sees her point. He agrees, even if every bone in his body is telling him it’s too dangerous and not worth it.

This continues on. Garroth feeds her the little information he gets, and she tells him to keep playing it up even as he voices his concerns more and more. She’s confident it will work out, that they’re so close to being one step ahead of Zane. But Garroth can see things are only getting more risky, but he places his instincts to the side.

And it keeps spiraling. It reaches the point where Garroth needs the artifact Laurance is protecting, and that is where Garroth tries to draw the line but it’s too late. The only way they’re getting Zane into another vulnerable position is with that amulet in Garroth’s hand, and there’s no time. No time to fill Laurance in, no time for Aphmau to tell him to pass it off to Garroth, and they both know that. Aphmau’s orders him to keep going, to do what he needs to get that amulet and that Laurance will understand later, and despite the pit in his stomach he doesn’t defy the order. He knocks out his best friend.

And as Garroth thinks that must be rock bottom for this whole messy scheme, it only gets worse. He is stuck following Zane’s orders, attacking his friends, until Aphmau says enough is enough. Except he realizes as he is sworn into the Jury of Nine, filled with power that makes him sick, that she’s not going to. She will not relieve him of this messed up situation until she gets the information she wants that he knows Zane won’t give until he’s already done it. And so, he finally defies.

Of course, it’s too late. It’s a blur of confusion, there’s a portal, they’re in some towering marble cathedral, and only as Irene’s relic enters her, as Zane grows into a monsterous rage fueled magical form, does Aphmau realize she took this too far.

Laurance and Garroth are struggling to hold off Zane, there’s a crack that at least signals Katelyn has dealt with Lillian, and then a portal opens. For a brief second, everything is gonna be ok! A familiar voice with an unfamiliar look is urging them to hurry, abs thwy will.

The issue is, Zane tries to as well. That’s when Garroth taps into the magic he hates, because he sees Aphmau trying to return to the fight and he cannot let that happen. He doesn’t care if it’s her fault because it’s his too, he should’ve put his foot down long before it got so far and by Irene he will not fail to keep her safe because of it. He tells Laurance to get her out, and there is a moment where Aphmau thinks Laurance won’t listen and leave him here to die because that is what doing this will do, but he does. He forces Aphmau through the portal with him, and then it closes.

There are a few quiet seconds, where they catch their breath and do headcounts, but no matter how many times they do it they are one short. And Laurance, confused and hurt but above that he is angry, he looks to Aphmau and in a unsteady voice bubbling with emotion, he asks “What was that?!”

And all she can say is “It wasn’t supposed to go that far.”

And now Aphmau’s determination to bring Garroth home isn’t only fueled by the fact it’s Garroth, but now by guilt. Guilt about how she pushed and pushed and pushed against his warnings, which previously had worked out in her favor before. It’s what got her to be a lord! But this time, this time it didn’t and the price was steeper than she could’ve ever imagined.

Of course my changes don’t stop there, because I also believe it should be Laurance who sacrifices himself to save Garroth, but expanding into that is moreso about my distaste for Aaron and less about the betrayal arc so I’ll save it for another day

How it pertains to the betrayal arc is giving Garroth grief and guilt, having him feel the weight of the sacrifice as much as Aphmau and doubt he was even worth it. Also since I believe Garroth loses his sword in the Irene Dimension abs I think Laurance still has his (and if he doesn’t he will in this AU), imagine Garroth using Laurance’s sword.

It also expands on Laurance’s motivations, about how the last thing he wants is to fall to his shadow knight side and as we see in season two, he gets dangerously close. Him making the choice is him deciding to die a hero instead of living long enough to become a villain, or more specifically someone who would hurt Aphmau or someone she might have to kill.

And I think that’s everything! I hope anyone reading this enjoyed!

[zukkaoru]

for the drabble prompts: “I always thought the choice was mine / and I was right / but I just chose wrong” from the laurel hell lyric prompt list for any character(s) you want!!

i debated which character/s to write for this for a bit but ultimately i had to go with nikolai bsd because i think this line fits him very well. uhh sorry jupiter ik you don't know bsd but i have very bad brainrot. also this isn't edited bc i don't feel like it right now

(prompt requests are still open)

warnings: heavy religious imagery & symbolism, character death/dismemberment (#just fyolai things) word count: 602

.

Fyodor’s hands have always been cold. This was true when he was alive, when Nikolai grabbed hold of him and the only thing separating skin from skin was a pair of stolen gloves, thin enough to allow the iciness of Fyodor to seep through into Nikolai. And it is true now when all that remains of Fyodor is a severed arm, when Nikolai cradles the dismembered limb to his face and each finger is a lifeless icicle caressing his cheek.

This is what he wanted.

Congratulations, Dazai told him. Fyodor is dead. You did it. You killed the unkillable, you transformed yourself into Judas by choice. You brought the thirty pieces of silver to the men who wanted him dead, placed the proper tools in Dazai’s hands, and turned your back while he was crucified. You did it.

You proved your own free will.

You chose this.

Behind him, Dazai and Chuuya murmur to one another—about their friends back in Japan, about administering the antidote, about Dazai’s injuries, about Sigma. They talk about Sigma like Dazai is the only one who has ever cared about them. Like Nikolai didn’t save them from death, like Nikolai isn’t the only reason they were here and Dazai was able to use them in this game. Thirty pieces of silver. Thirty coin bombs never detonated.

Jesus was executed with two other men, one on either side, men who actually deserved the punishment they faced. To hang on a cross and slowly bleed out, nails through their hands, nails through their feet, their suffering on display for all to see.

Fukuchi is dead in Yokohama, if Dazai’s intel is to be believed. Sigma will never wake, if Fyodor’s words were true.

Which one of them begged for forgiveness in their final moments, and which died still rotting in their sins? Does it matter? They are gone and Nikolai is still breathing and this was his choice. This was his choice. This was his choice.

But Judas took his own life after betraying the one he loved.

Fyodor’s hand is cold. If he raises in three days’ time, Nikolai will be long gone. The Savior has the power to raise the dead, but why waste your time on someone who sold you out for thirty stray coins? Nikolai knows the stories; he grew up having them carved into his flesh each Sunday. He knows who lives, who is resurrected, who is redeemed. And he knows who turns traitor, then lets his grief and shame consume him, and is never mentioned again.

But Judas didn’t have a choice. Judas was merely a pawn in God’s perfect plan. Nikolai chose this.

Nikolai wanted to be free, so he took Fyodor’s life in his own hands and he made the choice and he has proven that no cage can hold him inside. No imitation of God can control his whims. He is free by no hand besides his own, but there is something inescapable forming in his chest that calls itself grief, and Nikolai is beginning to fear escaping one cage only leads you into another.

He always believed it was his choice, to bring about Fyodor’s death. He believed in his own free will, and he saw his plan through to its end. He was right—there is such thing as the existence of choice, because Fyodor is dead and his arm is clutched in Nikolai’s hands and no one sane would choose to kill the only person who ever understood them.

The choice was always Nikolai’s.

But now that the irreversible has come to pass, he fears he chose wrong.

[eternalglitch]

Can you give us the name of those novelas that you bought please? 👀💖

Sure!! Note that I cannot say if they are actually good yet, as I have only just started reading Archive Undying. So if you pick it up and it's terrible do not blame me lolol

The Archive Undying by Emma Mieko Candon:

WHEN AN AI DIES, ITS CITY DIES WITH IT WHEN A CITY FALLS, IT LEAVES A CORPSE BEHIND WHEN THAT CORPSE RUNS OFF, ONLY DEVOTION CAN BRING IT BACK When the robotic god of Khuon Mo went mad, it destroyed everything it touched. It killed its priests, its city, and all its wondrous works. But in its final death throes, the god brought one thing back to life: its favorite child, Sunai. For the seventeen years since, Sunai has walked the land like a ghost, unable to die, unable to age, and unable to forget the horrors he's seen. He's run as far as he can from the wreckage of his faith, drowning himself in drink, drugs, and men. But when Sunai wakes up in the bed of the one man he never should have slept with, he finds himself on a path straight back into the world of gods and machines. The Archive Undying is the first volume of Emma Mieko Candon's Downworld Sequence, a sci-fi series where AI deities and brutal police states clash, wielding giant robots steered by pilot-priests with corrupted bodies. Come get in the robot.

(glitch note: I started reading this one and I am obsessed so far. Pacific Rim and Evangelian vibes. Does have a LOT of cussing and mentions sex not an insignificant amount, so warning if that's not for you, but the characters so far and world building are very fun.)

Translation State by Ann Leckie:

Qven was created to be a Presger translator. The pride of their Clade, they always had a clear path before them: learn human ways, and eventually, make a match and serve as an intermediary between the dangerous alien Presger and the human worlds. The realization that they might want something else isn't "optimal behavior". It's the type of behavior that results in elimination.  But Qven rebels. And in doing so, their path collides with those of two others. Enae, a reluctant diplomat attempting to hunt down a fugitive who has been missing for over 200 years. And Reet, an adopted mechanic who is increasingly desperate to learn about his genetic roots—or anything that might explain why he operates so differently from those around him. As a Conclave of the various species approaches—and the long-standing treaty between the humans and the Presger is on the line—the decisions of all three will have ripple effects across the stars.  

Dragonfall by L. R. Lam:

Long ago, humans betrayed dragons, stealing their magic and banishing them to a dying world. Centuries later, their descendants worship dragons as gods. But the 'gods' remember, and they do not forgive. Since they were orphaned, Arcady has scraped a living thieving on the streets of Vatra, dreaming of life among the nobility - and revenge. When the chance arises to steal a powerful artefact from the bones of the Plaguebringer, the most hated person in Lumet history, they jump at it, for its magic holds the key to their dreams. But the spell has unintended consequences, and drags Everen - the last male dragon, who was once foretold to save his kind - into the human world. Trapped, and disguised as a human, Everen soon realises that the key to his destiny, and to regaining his true power, lies in Arcady. All he needs to do is convince one little thief to bond with him completely - body, mind, and soul - and then kill them . . . Yet the closer the two become, the greater the risk both their worlds will shatter.

(glitch note: lots of reviews mention sexy dragons which admittedly I am a little nervous about because that kind of romance can be very much not my cup of tea, but I believe the author is not cis and the main character is gender fluid so I decided to give it a read anyways... Maybe I'll be surprised with how the romance goes.)

[ecoamerica]

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

[homoeroticfisticuffs]

wip wednesday because i've never done it before and i'm actually working on something right now

(slight gamora character study + eventual starmora) (just a little snippet of the beginning, the whole thing is almost 6k now yay) (snippet length: 757 words)

Being with the Guardians was nothing short of foreign for her.

Sure, she had done collaborative work before, like when she and Nebula had been indignantly serving under Ronan and working alongside Korath and his troops; but this was altogether different. It was deeper, more personal in a way that she wasn’t used to. She felt like she didn’t know how to navigate it at all.

Until now, her driving force in life had been her anger, a near-mindless and primal way of life that allowed her to survive. It manifested into anger for Thanos, for Nebula, for their siblings, for all of it, finding its home and thriving in the constant cruelty she had to endure since her very first day with the Mad Titan. In a way, her own rage only reminded her of that of her captor, and made her feel sick at realizing how similar she really was to him. It seemed only fitting that the final straw that broke her away from him after all her years of torment was one motivated by sadness, and a need to protect what she could from his dark and horrible clutches.

When she found out that he knew where the power stone was, there wasn’t a cell in her body that could resist the need to do something about it, to stop him in whatever way she possibly could. It wasn’t the first time she felt rage for him and his sickening motivations, but it was the first time they made her feel true fear. The memories of her last day on her home planet still haunted her, and she knew she couldn’t let him wreak that kind of havoc again, not when she could really do something about it this time.

So she did, she betrayed him and made sure the stone was out of his reach, and she met the Guardians in the process. She had originally never had any intention of staying with them, not after the stone was secure in the hands of the Nova Corps; that was the only reason she was with them in the first place, and she had no real reason to stick around after that.

But there was a part of her, a bigger, deeper part of her that she couldn’t ignore, that wanted to stay.

As much as they got on her nerves, and as painfully stupid as she knew they all were, there was just something about them that drew her to them. The way they all had one shared goal, and achieved it together, fought side-by-side, and shared their pasts with each other like tearing themselves open and displaying their true and honest viscera made her feel something she had never felt before, not even with Nebula.

Things with Nebula were rocky at best. She did truly find herself loving her sister, but not in a way that she could afford to express if she wanted to stay alive. Things with Nebula were the way that they had to be, no matter how much she hated it. She always wished that they could have been sisters under better circumstances, and that maybe they could really get along if things were different, but she knew that could never be. She wasn’t naïve.

The Guardians presented something entirely different. Was it belonging? Freedom? Acceptance? Those were the only words she could come up with to describe it, only able to characterize it through a lack of pressure or feeling like she had to be the best or live under somebody else’s thumb. It was liberating being able to operate on her own, being a part of a team that she truly felt a strong bond with and who made her feel like she was really helping to make a lasting difference in the galaxy.

And as far as bonds went, over time she found that she had vastly different connections with each of her teammates. Rocket was the laughable demolitionist, someone you could rely on to get a job done or save your ass and always have something snarky to say about it. Groot was comparable to a child or a pet, especially after he had to be regrown; he could fight if he needed to, but the team preferred to keep him out of harm's way as much as they could. Drax was the amiable idiot, a contendable foe in battle and a passionate friend and sparring partner but severely lacking in his capabilities for higher intellectual thought. Mantis was a sweet soul who found belonging with the Guardians, even though her fighting skills were near-none. And Quill…

Well, Quill was Quill.

(all of this was written like 3 months ago and has been slightly revised since then, i'm still fighting to finish it haha) (if you want to read some of my finished and posted writing, you can find that here)

[mdhwrites]

The Nightmare Catch 22 of Hunter as a Clone

So first, let's just get this out of the way: The Grimmwalker twist was unnecessary. It wasn't properly introduced until S2B, with the only real foreshadowing of it being a single element in the S1 finale and the fact that Hunter didn't have magic. They could have kept him as having no magic though and been a genuine orphan that Belos took in to raise as a protege, possibly inspired to do it MORE because Hunter had a failing Bile Sac and would never be able to cast magic by himself which would have made him appear more human to Belos than the other denizens. Someone he could connect with more. This also would have made it so Hunter would have HAD to choose to leave Belos on the grounds of morality rather than being a disposable clone that Belos just straight up tries to kill before Hunter can actually rebuke Belos' way of doing things and the like, making his arc and redemption stronger. This also would have allowed for the same steps taken but less baggage that they couldn't deal with because of the shortening.

But, as always, TOH couldn't kill its darlings so let's talk about the nightmare that is how they dealt with Hunter being a clone, especially in the context of his crises of identity.

So the first thing that has to be acknowledged is that this is nothing new when it comes to clones. Clones have been a staple of sci-fi and fantasy for a LONG time and a clone reveal is ALWAYS more common than the person actually knowing what they were. This makes a lot of sense thematically though and it's a trope for a good reason. It opens up a lot of questions about what makes a person their own person, nature versus nurture, etc. like that. And the common decision by most media is to have the clone reject that who they're made from doesn't matter, they're going to be themselves, doubling down on the idea that free will is that which makes us human and ourselves rather than a machine (which also brings this up a lot in matters of androids.)

Which I will give credit that that DOES actually fit the goals of TOH. That you being you is the best thing possible in this world. There's just a couple catches to it. The first is obviously time as by the time Hollow Mind happens, there's VERY little time to deal with it and Hunter still spends some of that time just not addressing it and lying/keeping secrets instead because this show has very few ideas of what to do with things when it comes to angst. He's not the most prolific liar/secret keep in the series amongst the good guys after all as that title firmly goes to Luz.

And that time problem IS a problem. After all, this is their setup: Hunter is a clone of someone who recorded history in his world has entirely forgotten. Instead, he looks and is raised by Belos. As such, he assumes that Belos is who he is cloned after and after the attempt on his life, even more than just being a clone (I am serious when I say the Grimmwalker twist is unnecessary), by Belos, he rejects being like his perceived Uncle. And so he becomes a witch loving, Palisman befriending good guy who betrays Belos!

...Which is literally EVERYTHING we know about Caleb. Every concrete fact about him lines up with what Hunter turns into. Even worse, NO ONE wants the old Hunter. They only want what he is when he is lying, not acting like himself... Or like Caleb. Darius is actually the creepiest here as he explicitly wants Hunter to be like his dead lover and the canonical fact that EVERY Golden Guard ends up betraying Belos means that Darius effectively just wants to not guide Hunter to a better place but to just... remake his old love.

And that's fucking creepy.

Luz wants nothing to do with what Hunter was before he started becoming good though. Amity wants Hunter to become like her which is essentially just becoming Luz. Willow likes the time she spends with 'Caleb' and then is mad at Hunter when he's back to being the Golden Guard, at least until he goes against Belos by saving The Emerald Entrails, pleasing Darius and her.

But this is where the Catch 22 comes into play. From the character's perspective, Hunter IS rebelling against what he thinks he was made to be. Who he believes himself to be a clone of. He has no reason to assume he's Caleb's brother after all. Hell, he'd probably get confused about why this ancient white dude named Philip has brown hair when Belos has blonde. Not white like Eda but blonde. So we NEEDED some time for Hunter to introspect, learn the secondary twist that he is a clone of Caleb, learn about who this Caleb guy was, which is effectively impossible beyond the fairy tale they're told which tells Hunter nothing of Caleb besides the boy liking witch booty over taking care of his brother, and for him to THEN decide he was okay with being like Caleb.

And that would have been fine. It would have even been theoretically a bit novel if not kind of weird. Again: Writers have always chosen that the person goes their own way for a reason. Hunter deciding being Caleb is cool with him is one way to close that out... But it would still be him choosing to be a different person. That his individuality isn't what's most important which goes against pretty much the core theme of TOH, who believes individuality and self expression is the ultimate priority. Full stop.

So you have a character who narratively, for the sake of having the redemption arc they want him to have and who logically fits into this place by contrasting against his uncle, also cannot become that person because he's a clone and his clone appears to be the anti-thesis of his uncle, thus making each of those points of contrast not him becoming his own character but him becoming just a different, ancient white bloke. There is no winning with this. And in the end, there was no victory. Hunter turned into a copy of Caleb, his arc feels shallow in part because of it and the Grimmwalker stuff robbed time away from the rest of the series for minimal payoff and a blow to the core themes.

All for a twist that cheapened his arc in the first place and had no real reason to be here besides being kind of neat conceptually.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

And finally a Twitter you can follow too!

[toddhewitt]

do we think “where else would you wake up in the morning and matter” actually struck a nerve with silver?

from what i’ve seen, the majority interprets his reaction as genuine, and i do like this interpretation because it adds a double meaning to the scene, but i don’t think it’s unquestionable.

slightly paraphrasing and expanding on the tags i once put under a gifset of that scene: “silver knows he’s gonna get his share of the gold, but to do that he has to act as though he thinks he won’t be getting it. to be believable, he gets angry with flint (not completely falsely; and still for the reason that flint won’t put the gold first), and then flint needs to convince him that silver needs to stay on the crew. but here’s the thing - silver also needs flint to need to convince him, so that silver can have a reason to stay on the crew that would be convincing to flint (it’s necessary that he stays on the crew so it won’t be suspicious that both he and the gold are gone at the same time). and then flint says ’you walk out on this and where the fuck are you going’ and silver looks stricken - and it’s EXACTLY the result that silver needed. he needed flint to provide a reason for him to stay so he could continue playing his role, and his reaction to it just might be a false one and it just might be a true one.”

if silver isn’t truly affected by those words then the look on his face is just another mask, and it doesn’t have its double meaning, and i love the possibility of the double meaning. on the other hand, as he proves in the rest of this episode and in general, he’s definitely capable of looking like it affected him while it didn’t really, and i can’t find much evidence that “mattering” is something silver pays any mind to. personally i find it fitting if he doesn’t, or at least didn’t up until that point, care for it.

i expect i might see a point being made about silver sacrificing his leg for the crew but that’s another reading that isn’t unquestionable - personally i’d argue that he didn’t do it for the crew (certainly not solely and imo not even primarily, possibly not at all). that’s a whole other discussion i could expand on but it’s not exactly the topic here so i’ll say that the gist of it is that silver obviously noticed vane’s guy’s keys are missing and knew the crew would come to save him, meaning he only had to stall until they did; plus, he couldn’t betray them because if he did and then they got free and realized his betrayal he’d be as good as dead.

looking for other occurrences of silver interacting with the topic of “mattering”, the final episodes give us something interesting: there’s silver claiming (and to me, his belief seems genuine) that he has no story and that his past doesn’t matter; on the other hand there’s flint predicting his “casting about in the dark for some proof that you mattered”, and while we don’t have a lot of evidence of the effect this would have on silver, it is very heavily implied by both the show and possibly treasure island that it would be effective.

besides those, i can’t really recall any other instances where mattering was something silver pays any mind to, but i might be missing something. and if this is truly all the evidence, it’s not really enough to judge either way.

another way i like looking at it is that in their argument in 2.07, flint created the notion that “mattering” should... well… matter, in silver’s mind. this is mostly supported by the fact that by all appearances (though appearances are not the whole story of course) it wasn’t something silver cared for before this conversation. more than that, i adore the thought that flint didn’t create that idea in him in their argument in 2.07 but rather in their final conversation in 4.10. i base both of these readings on the fact that the most notable instances where silver does seem to care about it are when flint is the one who claims so. it also beautifully matches silver’s belief that flint conjures realities, and the whole deal of silver not having a story before flint, silver seemingly not having existed before the start of the show.

it just seems odd to me to treat the assumption that he cares about it as a given, as silver’s cold practicality is one of the most important aspects of his characterization, especially considering the way it contrasts flint. i acknowledge that another important aspect of it is that he contains multitudes and inner contradictions, so it might be that he cares about “mattering” despite the lack of evidence of it, but even so, i believe that’s not the whole truth of it.

it’s possible there isn’t one clear answer here - maybe it’s one of those cases where the story allows for more freedom of interpretation as it doesn’t point strongly to a single reading. i’m just curious to understand why the common reading is that it must be important to him, even if the reasons are as simple as that it’s narratively satisfying or that silver’s manipulation of flint worked too well on the audience.

[halfhoursonearth-writes]

On Changes to Canon and What Happens When Your Fix-It Needs to Break a Perfect Scene

I’ve just finished writing through the final Agni Kai in I Asked You First, a canon-divergent Zutara fic that covers the span forward from The Southern Raiders. If you’re reading that story (first of all, thank you!!) and are interested in some musings on canon-tweaking and character arcs, this is for you! If you’d like to read but haven’t, or aren’t caught up, then what follows is a bit spoilery. 

[I’m not even sure if this sort of metacommentary is something fic authors do/should do or if anyone wants this, but here I am, and I’ve brought paragraphs!]

I will start by saying that I dreaded writing the final Agni Kai.

Because I’ve penned more than 100,000 words into a timespan that unfolds over three episodes in canon, I’ve mostly been writing into off screen moments. Why I chose to breathe so much into this corner of ATLA’s narrative is the subject of a different ramble, but the result is that so far there have only been a few instances where I’ve had to grapple with major canon plot points. Ember Island Players and Zuko’s reunion with Iroh jump to mind. 

My strategy for these scenes has generally been to play them as straight as I can while tinkering with the emotional stakes (e.g., how would the EIP balcony scene with Aang feel for Katara if she’s just realizing her feelings lie elsewhere?) or expanding them only to account for new/different dynamics created by the canon divergence (e.g., how might Iroh and Zuko’s reunion grow from adding more experience with articulating emotions/more intimacy skills to Zuko’s character development?). Even still, I feared arriving at such essential story moments. Would these scenes be boring to relive for the reader? Would they feel shoehorned or inorganic in an evolving narrative? 

But no single scene caused me as much agita as the final Agni Kai. Because, in my mind, the final Agni Kai is just about perfect. It is powerful, profound and character-defining for everyone involved. 

Well if it’s so perfect and powerful, then why would you change it? 

Because played straight in I Asked You First, the final Agni Kai would no longer be quite so perfect or powerful. Some of the reasons this scene works so astoundingly in canon no longer apply to the slightly altered character arcs in IAYF. There are a few reasons why, but they mostly stem from the fact that Zuko and Katara falling in love on Ember Island changes the stakes and implications of the canon Agni Kai for each of their character journeys. 

So I had a challenge ahead of me:

How could I ensure that ATLA's narrative climax for Zuko and Katara remained impactful and true to their character arcs?

Let me set up this question for each character.

In the series, Zuko’s choice to take lightning for Katara is a character-defining moment. It is made more impactful by the tenuousness of their friendship (regardless of whether their dynamic is imbued with the possibility of more) and the way his choice contrasts his betrayal in Ba Sing Se. 

The audience sees that Zuko has come to deserve his honorable destiny because he would cast it aside to save a friend—the very person he once betrayed to lay claim to what he once saw as his fate. To go one step further, he is completing a growth arc here from a boy with such a monomaniacal focus on his own personal destiny that he cannot see the way his actions harm others into a man with a broad and balanced perspective who would give up his life to keep another person—someone who already represents something essential and human, the potential to find hope amid the ravages of war—from coming to harm. 

But Zuko in I Asked You First? Yeah, we know he’s going to take that hit for Katara. To make such a sacrifice for the woman he loves is beautiful in its own way, but not nearly as profound for his arc or demonstrative of his growth. 

So how could this canon divergence maintain the power of the Agni Kai for Zuko's growth? 

That was my challenge for Zuko. 

In the series, the Agni Kai is character-defining for Katara for a few reasons. She overcomes her narrative foil, for one. Second, she experiences the gravity of Zuko’s sacrifice for her—bearing primary witness to the astounding scale of his character growth—enabling her to fully appreciate the human potential for change. And perhaps most importantly, after a life torn apart by the Fire Nation invading her home, Katara arrives in their capital, not as a vengeful conqueror but as the one who can help curb violence and save the world’s hope for peace, so that she may find peace elsewhere.

Fueled by her need to save her friend, Katara overcomes Azula not with an astounding display of force (though her power is certainly on display as well), but rather with resourcefulness and ingenuity—and I would argue—compassion. It’s a way for her to defeat Azula that really lines up with what we know about Katara’s character.

But—and I am not arguing that this is a fault of this scene—the canon narrative is not nearly as primarily concerned with setting up Katara’s future arc as it is with establishing Aang’s or Zuko’s. I think the final Agni Kai in canon actually does set Katara up to be a world changing-hero…and then kind of lets that be the end of it. She’s the only one who can take down Azula and then she’s Aang’s prize. There are many amazing fics set after ATLA that really wonderfully explore what this version of Katara could become if she casts aside the canon vision of her future. But I’ve already written her down a different path, one I believe can be equally rewarding for her character, but one that requires a slightly different Agni Kai.

In I Asked You First Katara already profoundly understands that people can change and that Zuko has. She already loves him for it. Katara still arrives in the Fire Nation capital—after their warmaking tore apart her life—to curb violence and create the hope for peace. But her relationship to the Fire Nation has already changed through loving Zuko and playing a key part in his examinations of his not-all-bad family legacy. She's already swimming in all that nuance and potential. She has also begun to determine that she will shape her destiny by what she and Zuko do together. How this will work in a way that affirms Katara’s identity remains one of the central concerns of the upcoming (final?) leg of this story, so I won’t get too far into the weeds of it here.

But it means that when it comes to Katara in the final Agni Kai, my challenge wasn’t just: how could this canon divergence maintain the power of the Agni Kai for Katara’s growth? It was:

How could this canon divergence maintain the power of the Agni Kai for Katara’s growth—while setting her up for the world-changing future I'm writing for her?

So, these were my quandaries. And for me, the answers came in the form of canon tweaks I made in both the set-up and unfolding of the Agni Kai, in conversations and actions, and most notably in a moment when Katara—with all her ingenuity and resourcefulness—calls upon a different tool from her arsenal. She defeats Azula with a move that Zuko showed her, one that reflects back one of the greatest feats firebenders can achieve with the power and forms of her people. The impact of waterbenders on Iroh—and Iroh on Zuko—comes full circle through Katara, and it's peace-brinigng.

And now? Now we get to see how this sets the stage for what Katara and Zuko will do in the future, and what they can do together.

Anyway, like I said, I'm not sure this sort of authorial insight is something people are interested in, but writing some of this analysis out has helped me work through what's coming next. And now that I have arrived here on tumblr dot com with my brain rot stinking fresh, I wanted to offer it up for anyone who may be interested. I remain so extremely grateful that people have read and engaged with IAYF through thousands of words and long hiatuses. So, again, THANK YOU! I love this community and am happy to be floating around here.

[mysterycharacterbracket]

Round L6, Poll #16 (Losers bracket 1O FINAL)

Remember, this is the losers bracket. We are matching up the winners of round L5. The winners will move on to the second losers brackets in round L7, and the losers will be revealed and eliminated.

Character 100: Poor guy is a prequel character who only exists to have his identity stolen. He's a stepping stone for someone else's revenge. He's an innocent guy who became a pawn without ever realising it. He trusted his friend and got backstabbed for it. Can you imagine being his parents, raising a child for 18 years, and as soon as he leaves to go to The Big City he never talks to you again? Can you imagine being his parents, hearing rumors about his exploits at the academy, and they sounds like the actions of an entirely different person? Can you imagine being his identity stealer, and being used in some sort of japan exclusive McDonald's hamburger commercial? Can you imagine having your identity stolen by someone so Thoroughly, it becomes their default name even after everyone learns of their original name? Can you imagine being so irrelevant that the story forgets your parents even exist until its time to tie up loose ends and kill them, in the same way you died? God did not smile upon him when he was born, and that's hilarious. Poor bastard never stood a chance, i mean he literally died in the same episode he was introduced in. Also he's from texas.

Character 47: Short description: This character is this criminal mastermind who’s unexpectedly kind to their crew. They can navigate, hack, and have evaded the FBI for years. This person is essentially the leader, but doesn’t really act like it, always complimenting their team. They’re reclusive, but clearly care about those they love even though they’ve never shown their face. They’re cold and almost heartless to those that cross them, calm and collected during high risk operations. Very self-sacrificial and loyal, though they’re not really appreciated by the other characters. They take responsibility for their crew, handling everything in the background; along with teaching them what they know. They never betray the protagonists, even though they get tortured for almost a year. They’ve beaten up mercenaries with their bare hands… They end up dying in a horrible way, but not before they save everybody they love. They only had a week with their crew before they passed, though I guess in that way, they died at their happiest. …Also, this person is implied to be psychic. The blorbo. Long Description