#anyways i'm very curious how people perceive me

[sga-owns-my-soul]

i'm just curious

[comingdownwithme]

Can we see more of Jeff and Toby also is Ben and Ej I’m the comic of not what are your headcanons for them??

Jeff and Toby have always been my favs since I was a kid, so you'll definitely be seeing more of them!

As for the comic, the whole thing is more of snippets and peeks into my interpretation of Creepypasta instead of a solid, sequential storyline, so not a whole lot is concrete, and I won't be posting a whole, fleshed out comic since it's very time consuming. I'm definitely sure Ben and EJ would show up though, especially during Jeff's directionless wanderings

Anyways, Woe! Headcanons be upon ye!

Eyeless Jack

Jack Nyras is a man just trying to survive after he had been left disabled and transformed from putting his trust in the wrong people. Even as the demon contorts and shapes it's host as if it were trying to fit itself it's host's own flesh, Jack remains conscious, all too aware of what is happening to him and the dizzying, maddening hunger that drives him forward

He's gone from a 5'6"-ish guy to a whole 6 foot something of a man after the incident. The demon disfigured and stretched his body to "make itself at home", though it isn't too obvious with his shitty posture and what he wears

He used to go to medschool and was about to graduate as a Valedictorian.

He carries a roll of surgical knives in his hoodie pocket! (My best friend gave me this idea :)))

Burn scars over his eyes! Hot tar does that to you ig, and it harmed him enough to last despite his new form's accelerated regeneration

He's still sane enough to have morals (or at least, he believes he's sane enough), so though he isn't exactly picky, he prefers kidneys since his victims would usually survive with only one, and he strikes at night when his "patients" are sleeping

He's good friends with Jeff (even if neither would admit it, ESPECIALLY not Jeff). They first started out as seeing each other as nothing more than "easy body disposal" and "free meal provider", but each time they bump into each other, they've began to get along past their perceived usefulness

BEN drowned

An angry, vindictive spirit that's been freed from the confines of where he had been sealed. Even still, he can't remember his own face, so despite his newfound freedom, he had taken the form of the model he had been using during his digital imprisonment to manifest. He now wanders the world, vengeful and curious, yearning for a peace he might never get.

His face is stuck between 2 expressions: the calm, neutral look of the elegy of emptiness (which is his usual), or a more expressive- albeit heavily distorted face- during moments of heightened emotion like anger, sadness, etc. Nothing changes from his expression, not even his mouth moves.

The latter is also a reference to how fans usually drew Ben, along with just... .EXE characters in general-

His clothes are always soggy :(

He can manipulate and change his physical form, but the binary scarred into on his calf stays no matter what he does, whether that be changing forms entirely or removing the limb from his "model", in which case the binary moves elsewhere.

Ben is telepathic. He can choose who can understand him at any given moment, whether it be a group, a pair, or a singular person. Everyone else outside of the conversation could hear only gargling, wheezing and coughing.

Avoids areas where water is usually found in large amounts. I.e, lakes, rivers, bathrooms, etc.

[captainmera]

How do you go about posting art on the internet?

Do you just ignore the people that hate it and hope people like it?

Do still do it even if it makes you nervous?

Do you only show the ones you like or?

(LOVE YOUR ART! I'm just curious how you feel during the process, as I feel worried and I'm scared about showing my own art online.)

(Thank you very much 💙🙌)

I post my stuff for myself. If people like it, that’s a plus.

Of course I would like for others to like it, but I'm not for everyone and that’s okay. Which means that when people bring hate or negativity to me, it's a reflection on them, not me. I'm not bringing it to them. They came here.

If you're eating your homemade lunch and someone random person comes to your table to tell you they hate that dish you're having for lunch, and you shouldn't eat it because they wouldn't eat it. Like...... would you stop eating it? No?

Some stuff makes me nervous, but only because sometimes I'm not sure if people will react strongly to something that is personal to me. But that comes with the territory. And I post it anyway because it matters to me personally.

To create is to be vulnerable.

To be vulnerable is to be scared and take the risk or chance anyway. To do something even if you're scared takes courage.

To create is to have courage.

So have courage. Be scared, and do the thing anyway.

If it matters to you, then create it and share it regardless.

You also don't have to share your art. But it sounds like you want others to perceive it. And, well, I hate to break it to you. But that means you're going to have to be brave for it.

[ryuichirou]

So i'm reading your yandere/hypnosis post and i get to Vil being utterly jealous enough to try on Rook; and it makes me think about his drive and the second place club lol (Leona, Jamil and Vil) like D: poor them they're always outranked by that ooonnee person! Can our boys catch a break? whether that person knows or not I always tend to feel bad--especially for Vil since i remember his inner speech in book 5 and the fact that his most trusted person ended up being such a big fan of the person who makes him feel like second best. wait i love rookvil i think i made myself sad LOL NOoo--aahh I rambled im sorry, i guess the main question i wanna ask is what do you think about those particular three always having to come second to their respective counterparts? I think your opinions and insight is so interesting that i'd like to know your thoughts on this! and you don't have to answer for all three characters if you dont wanna I was just curious on your thoughts! Anyways, have a good day and stay hydrated! it's hot this summer oof

Anon! Took some time to get back to you as well, sorry for the late reply. Summer is already over, but it’s still SO HOT…

Without diving into just how much I love the ending of book5 and the whole Rook-Vil-Neige thing (I feel like I talk about it all the time LOL)… It is interesting how these Vil, Jamil and Leona always get to be second best, isn’t it? But ironically, I don’t think I ever grouped them in my head based on this. Maybe it’s because of how different their situations are? But also now that I think about it…

Vil isn’t better than Neige, and he tries to be better by working hard.

Jamil is better than Kalim, but he can’t be better because of his status.

Leona may or may not be better than Falena in some ways, but he doesn’t even bother.

Ignoring the fact that this “better” is always subjective and in actuality things are more complex than that… and also trying not to sound like an armchair therapist that’s just telling anime boys “you should have done this you idiot”, but.

Jamil got the most development in that sense because this internal conflict is very straightforward, in fact, he was the easiest one to describe with these little sentences I just wrote. Jamil wants to stop pretending to be worse than he is, he wants to work hard and to show how great he is without being forced to get worse results than Kalim. He is only the second best because he consciously allows Kalim to be the best whenever he is given this choice. And he isn’t always given a choice: a lot of times the system decides for him, just like when Crowley chose Kalim to be the housewarden. Still, even in that situation, Jamil knows for a fact the shape, the density and the nature of this ceiling he can’t break, he’s been aware of it for his entire life. This is why it’s easy to pinpoint moments of Jamil’s growth: when he expresses how much he hates pretending to be worse than Kalim, when he says that he won’t hold back anymore, when he gets to dance and rap at VDC as a lead-vocalist and, ironically, when he gets scolded by Leona in ch6 (I have some issues with their sub-story, but still).

With Vil, the difficult part is to understand what exactly he understands as “beauty”: I mentioned it in a bunch of Vil-centric posts, but we’ve seen how in-canon he was described as too beautiful, therefore not as relatable as Neige. So this isn’t about beauty, and in a way I think this isn’t about Neige either. This is about Vil’s own feeling of self-worth and self-expression, and how people perceive him; Neige is just a very good point of reference, a good metric, especially considering that they always end up being compared to each other and that comparing numbers of followers is easy and seemingly objective (which is a cruel trap a lot of people fall for).

What I’m trying to say is that Vil isn’t fully and constantly aware of “the shape of this ceiling”, or rather why he can’t reach Neige; this is why we had that ending to his book. This isn’t solely about skill or quality, but those are the main things Vil focuses on.

And Leona… I am not sure about him, to be honest, because it boils down to one problem that I have with him: I am not sure what he wants.

It’s easy to compare him to Jamil because it seems like his issue lies in being frustrated with the system: he will never be the first because Falena is literally the first born son. But I don’t think it’s fair to compare a prince with a servant like that, because even though Leona wouldn’t be the king, he still has a lot of power and opportunities, and we’ve seen Falena valuing his strong points and expressing that he wants Leona to help him. One might even say that he invited Leona to be by his side, as a brother and an equal. But this isn’t what Leona wants in actuality, is it?

His “ceiling” seems to be obvious, but I guess his actual frustrations lie elsewhere, and those are kind of difficult to see because of how inconsistent he is. But maybe it’s just me being frustrated with his character again lol

I am replying so late because I really thought I would have some kind of conclusion about this whole thing, but it seems like I don’t lol Still, it was an interesting topic to think about.

Thank you for your ask! <3

[aayakashii]

if you feel bothered by this question, feel free to delete, im just genuinely curious why you don't write for ships? /genq im really just curious

No no it's okay!! Actually thanks for asking this in a nice way lmao

How can I explain this. I have always had a really hard time seeing most (keyword: most) relationships in media as something else besides friendships or queerplatonic relationships.

For a very long time, I thought something was wrong with me lol but then I found out that some aroace people feel like this too – not all aroace ppl, obviously!! And that's not to say I don't ship ever, because I do (one of the ships I would go to war for is Nami x Vivi from One Piece), but I also do have a harder time seeing interactions between canon characters in a way that isn't queerplatonic most of the time. And to understand WHY, I had to first discover myself as someone who's in the aromantic spectrum.

Anyway, this makes it easier for me to write x reader stories because the reader themself is kind of a blank slate? I can develop in my mind how they'll feel/react/think, and the same goes for the canon characters – I can set in my mind how they react to a reader that acts in the specific way I'm writing, which makes it easier for me to see why and/or how they fell for the reader.

Long story short, I'm in the ace-spec and the aro-spec and this changes the way I perceive things

Disclaimeeerrr: not all aroace ppl feel like this; some have an entirely opposite experience, and that's OKAY, sexual and romantic orientations aren't set in stone after all etc etc etc I'm just giving my own perspective in this specific matter okayyyy thanks

[leonaluv]

What type of Roles would you play as Actor / Actress?

I was going to do Idol but I'm always curious 🥴 plot I would play in so. Anyways for fun

Four piles ,pick a cards

Choose a photo, words or number ~

Action ,Scene 1 , Cut , Scene 2

Pile one - Action

You're the one to question the system around you.   Look into the dark secrets of your family . Your love interests are normally going to be obsessed  with you or  not, you must focus on love ,more so focus on your character's journey .  Your first few roles , your going to face some criticism, people talking about how you express your facial expressions . People would want to be more emotional.  People like how you express your anger , and make scenes more intense .  Also, people hope to get a glimpse of who you are behind the scenes.  People like seeing you play more villain roles , more you like gambling and hunting down others. 

Cards: Queen , the moon reverse , five wands reverse , and truthseeker 

Characters / Descendants - Mal , disenchantment -Bean,bridgerton story - Queen Charlotte

Pile two: Scene 1

The roles you play , help to show off your sexy side , leaning into being innocent, the plot twist character, telling others to just trust you , while making sure your the one everyone feels comfortable around . Your acting reminds you of Lee Soo Hyuk . Someone that has cool vibes like that. Other roles remind me of mistress.

People perceive you as a good actress/ actor, despite playing the role , turn off the comments on social media. People see you winning awards ,even as a rookie. They see you as someone that has talent to play any role .

Cards: three wands , the fool reverse , angel reverse , and Prince reverse ice disaster

Pile three - cut

Here , the person that can pull off  playing different characters , you know, like Raven Symone, but still it's you , now your grandma , neighbor , aunt etc.  Either that or just like to play different types of characters .

 You have talent already at acting , as some of you all have already acted before in your childhood / teenage years . I guess more aspiring actors / actresses chose this pile . You have a good active imagination that helps you to bring your characters to life more.

 So some roles will be where you marry a famous person / reliving the life of a famous couple. Working in corporate but then you have some type of magical powers. . It starts off ordinary but then turns into something magical for your character when your play.  Playing the role of villain reminds me of strangers from hell.

Pile four- Scene 2

Here , your roles will have you playing someone that either time travels or given a second chance to live.  Going on 17 again type of shows.  You will playing role of sick patients , probably starting out.  Movies that are disasters .Most roles you have to play a younger person and at times you later are the one taking care of kids . Family type of drama. The type of dramas that get pick up from books but different when are screen. Dramas that in up showing more of dark side like winix clubs or new Sabrina show . More of mysterious reboot . People think your acting is new , that you tend to commit yourself very well to your role. Although some think you can be expressionless and a bit just of void like that of the death card.  Some think your bit psycho like the roles you play in film. This the supernatural pile to , where your cast in a lot of horrors , dealing with death , being the role of someone that here to spiritual heal . The roles to have you waiting to be save by someone , so the clumsy hero / heroine . Anime type of heros  role with the orphan card. The 'I die for you' type romance films. Aka till death do us apart . Eternal lovers.

Cards:  father, advocate, angel reverse, damsel reverse, child orphan , child eternal reverse , death

[covenofthearticulate]

I asked people this about Armand and Daniel ages ago, but now I'm curious about your thoughts regarding Louis

If Louis had the opportunity to undo one of the vampire nerfs, and either be able to go out in the sun without danger or pain, eat human food and generally be able to absorb things that aren't blood, or have sex without the need for hormone injections, which do you think he would go for?

Oooooooh that's such an interesting question, idk!!

On a practical note, opting to digest food would put an end to all his moral anxieties over killing that he's been grappling with for ages. But to give up blood feels like giving up vampirism as a whole LOL like what's the point. Killing is the only source of pleasure in his miserable existence; blood is really the only constant he has in his life. Getting up each morning and wrestling with that fact is one of the foundational tenants of Louis de Pointe du Lac.

I'm also just thinking about this absolutely based quote from totbt:

Lestat, you can't become human by simply taking over a human body! You weren't human when you were alive! You were born a monster, and you know it.

Like aksjhdbkfdhsb apart from this being the most sickening insult in the history of vampire kind, I've always wondered how much Louis was actually talking about himself here. Despite the fact that he later admits that he KNOWS he went too far when he said this ("Sometimes you frighten me so badly I hurl sticks and stones at you.") I still think he absolutely meant what he said. There's just something about the Catholic Angst Flavor of being born a monster, being damned from the start, that I think is just going to be forever engrained in Louis.

ANYWAY I didn't mean for this to delve into a whole meta analysis but this is all to say that I think even if Louis were to give up blood, he would still perceive himself as a monster.

My instinct is to say that he'd pick sunlight, mostly because the very first thing that popped into my head when I read this ask was the exchange he had with Lestat at the end of totbt:

"I didn't want the weakness; I didn't want the limitations; I didn't want the revolting needs and the endless vulnerability; I didn't want the drenching sweat or the searing cold. I didn't want the blinding darkness, or the noises that walled up my hearing, or the quick, frantic culmination of erotic passion; I didn't want the trivia; I didn't want the ugliness. I didn't want the isolation; I didn't want the constant fatigue." "You explained this to me before. There must have been something...however small...that was good!" "What do you think?" "The light of the sun."

There's just something so poignant about this moment, when after his big misadventure, Lestat is still reeling, still upset and confused and anguished about everything that happened, and it's Louis who reminds him of why he so desperately wanted to be human in the first place.

I know that, when Daniel asks Louis if he misses the sun, Louis replies "Not really." And maybe that is true, maybe Louis doesn't miss the sunlight when he's able to enjoy the beauty of the world around him with all the depth of a vampire. But I still think that the poet and the aesthete in him yearns for the light.

Also he's definitely not choosing sex LOL my guy has 0 libido and no interest in experiencing that sort of thing as a vampire. I know that's hypocritical of me to say as someone who thinks about Loustat Smut like 24/7 but LMFAO Lestat has enough sexual appetite for the both of them

[kagoutiss]

You call ganondorf a girl a lot and now I'm wondering if you actually see him as a girl in some way? I can't see him like that but I am actually really curious how you interpret his gender now

!!! so i’ve written a more in depth summary about how i interpret his gender but the short(er) version is basically like…the gerudo don’t actually have an inherent concept of gender or gender binarism, and ganondorf doesn’t really even think of himself as being a Man. but as a result of him being raised for this role that is, by hyrulean standards, contingent upon Maleness, he’s also learned to despise having to navigate hylian society in this very constrained way that is completely arbitrary in his own culture. all in order to be perceived as a proper king, or be seen by hylians as an authority figure at all, or else be called effeminate or whatever. or be constantly othered from the rest of his people in the eyes of hylians, all on the basis of his biological subtype, which just happens to be extremely rare in gerudo people

and anyway i just feel like if he had to actually tick one of the 2 boxes on some hyrulean administrative form and didn’t have to stoop to anyone’s expectations of him, then he would mark F instead of M, partly because he’s so so sick of Having To Be A Man, and partly because all of his loved ones would be boxed into the F box by default, and i like the idea that the gerudo don’t really perceive themselves as being separate from ganondorf in the same way that hylians perceive Men & Woman to be separate, if that makes sense? and he also thinks that those designations are silly in general, so he’ll kind of just do whatever he wants when he doesn’t have to stoop to those constraints. like he fully enjoys having the title of King, and he uses he/him pronouns in the hylian language and is fine with them, and he’s not particularly dysphoric about anything physically, but in his mind he just isn’t a Man. gender is a silly contrived thing to him, but he’s had to study the nuances of it for his entire life, he could literally teach Hylian Gender Studies courses if he had to. and he’ll adopt certain aspects of gender stuff that he finds funny or interesting, or that feel more fitting to him, or that just confuse/enrage people, because he enjoys doing that too. but anyway to answer your question yes he is genuinely a girl to me sometimes agskfhakfjsksk, i’m not saying it as a joke. like he’s not always a girl but he’s often a girl and he’s almost never actually a man, and every other time, he just isn’t really assigning a gender to himself at all because ultimately it’s all made up anyway

that being said tho i like reading different headcanons for him :-) like the gerudo just ending up with one trans man every century who becomes king. there’s a lot of different ways you can interpret him gender-wise, which is part of what makes him fun lol

[gerrydelano]

Btw, i wanted to ask: what makes you hc Gerry as transfem? I'm more of a nb/transmasc gerry leaning person but i love reading about different interpretations of characters and you are obviously very passionate About it (feel free to ignore if its an uncomfortable question, there's no judgement behind it-im just curious.)

hello hello! no worries, i didn't perceive any judgment here, this is all in good fun! my gerry is on the nonbinary side of transfem anyway (which to me is an important thing to portray in general) but it is special to me both for logical reasons and just because it just feels so healing to me. i wrote a big meta about it here a really long time ago, and answered a more recent ask here, so i'll mostly just link those to avoid being too repetitive.

however, to me (just me personally!) the logic comes in as like... mary calls him gerard. she doesn't exactly strike me as a supportive ally parent who would gender her trans son correctly. eric also refers to gerry as his son, and he died when gerry was like 2, which is a little early for a kid to know they're trans. thirdly, he has a canon preference for a nickname that Isn't the name his mother calls him, which to me can signify dysphoria, and that chosen name happens to be a little more androgynous! plenty of women use the same nickname.

i don't believe canon gerry would have really had much of a chance to explore this side of him, as i also just believe he's a late bloomer, so to me it usually comes out easier in AUs where he's able to live for once. live free of his oppressive mother and her expectations of A Son And Heir, live free of the violence of his childhood and the things she made him do, live as a softer person. i think he would benefit from letting himself be softer, i think he would feel healthier and stronger and more himself if he gained some distance from The Son And Heir archetype forced on him from Pretty Much Birth. there are things to be said about what's expected of "sons" and how awfully people are often treated to try and mold them into the right kind of son, and that's something that gerry's story strikes close to for me.

all of that, and i also just find tenderness in this HC that fills my heart with love! i have gotten to write some really beautiful moments of exploration and intimacy and solidarity through this portrayal of him and it's just been so warm. so many people, especially on this site and especially fucking lately, have been expressing ideas that suggesting that someone might be transfem is inappropriate compared to suggesting that someone might be transmasc, that being transfem is a bad thing or a curse or an insult, and ngl it's all such bullshit.

we need kinder and more loving portrayals of transfeminine people of all walks just in general. and sometimes you just get the egg vibes off of somebody and it's okay. so, yes! i simply think estrogen could have saved her.

[toxicrivalries]

hi! i saw your tags when you reblogged the f1 and linguistics post :) i am so fascinated with italian and how lyrical it seems to be (but my contact with the language is limited so this might be generalized). i would love to learn anything you know about the language, any lore, facts, etymology, history, etc ahahah anything really.

(plus i am a ferrari fan, i adore how passionate the italians are!)

oh my god okay so ! you've pressed the infodump button times 2 because italian is part of my research so Uhm. Yeah 😅🫡

(just so we're clear: i don't properly speak italian, i understand it very well and can bootleg speak it because i speak french and spanish - but i have read so many fucking papers on the linguistic features of it, and my native language is heavily influenced by it as well)

Okay I'll spare you the hard science and math side of it even tho it makes my brain go BRRRR (listen. you can take the physics & engineering man out of physics & engineering but not the physics & engineering out of the man. resonant frequencies im love.you) BUT

so there's 3 different things that combine to make italian sound very melodic, especially to english speaking ears: intonation (the pitch variation sentences have), rhythm, and word stress. all languages have these features (and some also have tones, for example famously: mandarin).

italian has intonation that varies a lot within a sentence (compared to english), there's a very notable up down nature to most simple statement sentences, and even more variations when you get into complexity. that's the first thing that makes people say italian sounds melodic or lyrical.

rhythm is a biiiiit more complicated to explain but if you've ever had any classes on shakespeare or the homeric epics you've encountered the concept at least theoretically. the "iambic" part of "iambic pentameter" is the rhythm that shakespearean texts have when spoken. now, unfortunately there's no academic consensus on what rhythm italian has (for reference english has trochaic which is the opposite of iambic - stressed syllable followed by unstressed syllable) (DUH dun DUH dun DUH dun). but there IS academic consensus on spanish, which is a sister language to italian: spanish has the same as english. anyway yeah languages have rhythms, this definitely plays into the equation, we (i) just don't know how. (any native speakers who may have an answer to this are welcome to PLEASE TELL ME I'M SO CURIOUS)

and then finally word stress! okay sorry but english kiiiinda sucks at expressing word stress because one of the reasons english speakers suck at saying names from my culture is they seem to not perceive word strsss the same way. Regardless yeah, word stress means there's one (or more) syllables in a word that are louder and/or longer than the rest. some languages always stress the same syllables in words (french always stresses the final syllables, which is why it often can sound very staccato). most languages with varied word stress have rules about which syllables can be stressed. italian varies it - the most common word stress is the penultimate syllable, but the two on either side of it (antipenultimate, and ultimate) are often common too. figuring out where the FUCK the stress goes when you're faced with a new word you've never heard someone say out loud before is every italian learners nightmare (send help i am SUFFERING).

all these features combined mean there's a lot more variation in the overall melody compared to english which is why it sounds lyrical (I've heard people describe it as sing songy before too) to english speakers!

jesus that's a lot of words 😅🤣 hope that answers one of your questions ❣️

[monstersinthecosmos]

i feel like slightly younger than marius mael is the best just for flavor reasons lol. reeaally curious to know what you think

I think I usually land on slightly younger but not like a baby. Like early 30s maybe. BUT I'LL TELL YOU SOME THOUGHTS OF WHY I LIKE EACH OR WHY EACH COULD WORK:

Under 30: First of all because of Jesse's chapter in QOTD--Maharet was turned around age 20 I think? And for Jesse, I'm sure there's that sort of uncanny thing where your mind fills in blanks and makes excuses, like, her "aunt" has been around her whole life so like gee golly I guess she just looks young for her age! Except that there's like the vampire uncanniness too, so whatever you judge as an age doesn't super matter. So like, Mael blending in as one of her guy friends in his early 20s would make sense. Jesse DOES also clock him as not being human, so again I think the uncanniness might not make her peg either of them as a certain age.

I do worry if this clashes with the idea that he could properly be a priest? Caesar said that it takes 20 years to train a priest, but A) A lot of what Caesar said is like anti-Keltoi propaganda and might not be accurate since the Druids famously never left anything in writing, so there's very little first hand information about them. B) MAYBE IT'S OKAY BECUASE IN VC-VERSE TESKHAMEN IS REAL AND MAEL WAS REALLY COMMUNING WITH HIM SO IF THERE WAS LIKE MAGIC AFOOT IN THE COMMUNITY MAYBE HE GOT FAST TRACKED OR RESPECTED AS BEING SPECIAL IDK. I can work with it and make excuses lol.

I LOVE the idea of him being like a young man because of how much madder that would make Marius, plus the way he likes to mentor young blonde men lol. But it might like hurt him even worse if the author of all his misfortunate is like SOME KID.

In his 30s: Personally I usually land here because I DO wonder how long it takes him to gain status in his community and become a priest (in his 30s is still fast tracking it but maybe feels more plausible LOL) and I enjoy the idea of he and Marius being sort of similar to each other. Like, Marius often gets used as the example of Turning an Older Guy and what it means for his temperament and the way it translates to his immortality. I like imagining Mael as around Marius's age for that reason, like I want to remove all his excuses why Mael is a young stupid kid or even an old salty jerk--it forces Marius to confront that Mael is ALSO someone who is chill and smart and has had enough life experience. BUT WHILE THERE'S A WINDOW WHERE THEY COULD BE SIMILAR IN AGE, OR MAEL COULD BE A TAD OLDER, I ALSO STILL ENJOY MARIUS BEING LIKE "HE'S YOUNGER THAN ME I HATE THIS!" BECAUSE HIS AGE AND SELF-PERCEIVED WISDOM & EXPERIENCE ARE IMPORTANT TO HIS IDENTITY AND HE FEELS BELITTED LOL.

In his 40s: Makes sense for the above reason! But I like to skew younger personally just for the Marius ageism dynamic lol. Also there's something about him being a foil to Marius where like, if they're very similar in other ways it can kind of emphasize how their atheism/religion contrasts each other and affects them as people.

Over 50: ALSO POSSIBLE and it's hilarious bc in the audiobook the narrator reads him like such a grouchy old man lmao. I could see this causing a lot of resentment because Marius likes to be the oldest and wisest in the room. I could see him also being younger because Marius insults him every chance he gets and I just think he would've told us that Mael is like an old hag if it were true lol. Anyway wondering how this effects Marius's barbarian kink and how he submits to men.

[hwnglx]

Tbh, Kim Mingyu has this tall soft baby clumsy persona on the internet, but I wonder why does every reader say something nasty abt this man.. like a cheater even. Maybe sometime when you’re not super busy, you can make Real Kim Mingyu Personality Traits (like behind the scenes) idk i just trust ur readings so much, i know energies change but I just wanna hear the opinion/insights of the best reader here 😌 anyway i love reading your posts!! Lovelots bebe ❣️🫰🏻

just found this in my inbox, you're very sweet anon ᰔᩚ actually, i was pretty intrigued to read on mingyu's actual personality in contrast to how idols perceive him, since that can obviously differ in a variety of ways, and more often than not does not reflect someone's true colors. funnily enough, i've read for mingyu more briefly once before, and i remember his energy being surprisingly mature and not necessarily "nasty" (of course these things also depend on personal perception) what i can't deny is that he does seem to enjoy sleeping and flirting around women a lot. but can't lie, at this point it's more surprising for me to read on a male idol who doesn't lmao.

the way in which we view people very often has more to do with us than it has to do with them. in my reputation readings, i can often tell that it's common for (especially male) idols to be incredibly insecure.. a lot of comparisons being made (the environment they're in kinda sets them up for that unfortunately..) so they feel easily threatened by idols they identify as someone they aspire to be. this rings true in mingyu's case too, but i remember it was fiercely similar in wonyoung's reading, as well as a reading for sakura's reputation i did recently. so much bitterness, hurt egos and jealousy taints the way idols tend to look at each other. which as a result, for sure made me curious to know how much of my reputation readings corresponds with the idols' true colors. what others see of us is obviously very surface, and definitely not a direct reflection of our inner heart and soul.

i'm sure i'll come around to read more on mingyu too. personality readings are probably my favorite, just because i find human beings to be so multi-layered and fascinating.

[bigsoftmarshmallow]

Okay, this is one for the trial ask. Ya know, the one where Hyrule's judge decided that their best chance at stopping this bs was for him to experience the consequences of his actions?

Anyway, I loved that, but I was really looking for theor reactions.

I would loooove to read their reactions to Hyrule's initial sentence followed by their thoughts & feelings throughout. Like, I'm looking for how they feel about it. Especially in the case of TP, as it'd be here that he'd learn that, rather than having been tortured & slaughtered by Hyrule as he'd been believed. Only his ardent followers were thus & every other Gerudo was banished from Hyrule.

Now, I'm of the opinion that they aren't necessarily thriving, but they are certainly doing better socially with other tribes such as the Zuna in the Desert of Doubt. There's definitely struggle, but there doesn't seem to be any hard feelings towards Hyrule.

I'd also like to see TotK's reaction to the Gerudo of the Wild Era 7 how they're actually doing well as well as maintaining their own cultural identity & aren't subjugated by Hyrule in any way. More so an ally nation in an alliance. Yes, Hyrule acts as the head of which, but they also have every right to back out if they wish just like any of the other tribes.

Like, yes, there's the occasional perv, but in-general, the Gerudo are respected.

But, keep in mind that the Gerudo of TotK seem to very specifically feel responsible for him & even feel ashamed of him. Like, it's always the Gerudo who ever bring up their ties to Ganondorf as a point of shame in TotK. No one else. Suggesting that this feeling of shame is very personal & a matter of honor to them. Something that they wish to make right, not just with the other races, but also with themselves.

And, I can imagine that TotK will have to work really hard because of the sheer gravity of the attack he levied against the Gerudo themselves.

I already told you about how the attack on Gerudo Town would be perceived & that's from an outsider's perspective. Now, he has to stand face to face with them too.

I just really wanna see all the Dorfs process this information & come to terms with just how badly he fucked his own people over.

Like, mentally & emotionally.

Ooo, very nice. I liked reading this one and imagining it. The path to redemption is a long and jagged one, one that is hard to traverse, but I believe everyone can make it. Everyone can make the choice to be good and better. Everyone can be good if they just try (OK Papyrus calm down lol)

Once again I try to do Ganondorfs only, but Chat is in love with Demise and added him. It's nonsensical, seeing as he AINT EVEN GERUDO, but alas, Chat doesn't listen to me in this matter. So Demon King is forced through the redemption arc as well.

************************************************************************

The Initial Sentence and Reactions:

Hyrule's Judge: "Ganondorf, you are hereby sentenced to experience firsthand the consequences of your actions upon the Gerudo people. You will live among them, face their hardships, and understand the pain you have caused. Only then can you hope to seek redemption."

Wind Waker Ganondorf

Initial Reaction:

Shock and Anger: Wind Waker Ganondorf would be visibly taken aback, his eyes narrowing in fury. The notion of being forced to live among the people he sees as tools for his ambitions is an insult to his pride.

Inner Conflict: Despite his anger, a small part of him would be curious about the true state of his people.

Thoughts & Feelings Throughout:

First Encounter: Upon seeing the Gerudo struggle, he initially dismisses their hardships as a consequence of their own weakness.

Growing Realization: Over time, witnessing their resilience and sense of community despite the difficulties, he begins to see them not just as pawns but as individuals with their own lives and struggles.

Emotional Conflict: He grapples with feelings of guilt and responsibility, something entirely new to him. This conflict softens his anger, replacing it with a grudging respect for his people.

Self-Reflection: By the end of the sentence, Wind Waker Ganondorf feels a profound sense of failure and regret for the pain he has caused. This realization, however, is marred by his enduring ambition, making him vow to change his methods, not his goals.

Ocarina of Time Ganondorf

Initial Reaction:

Outrage and Denial: Ocarina of Time Ganondorf would be enraged, denying any wrongdoing. He views himself as a ruler who has done what is necessary for power and control.

Scorn: He initially holds contempt for the sentence, considering it a waste of his time.

Thoughts & Feelings Throughout:

Hostility: His initial interactions with the Gerudo are marked by hostility. He expects them to fear and revere him, but instead, he faces their disdain and pain.

Confronting Reality: The stories of their suffering, especially from the elder Gerudo who remember his reign, start to penetrate his hardened heart.

Reflection: He begins to understand the depth of their betrayal and abandonment, feeling a twisted sense of responsibility. This is a bitter pill to swallow for someone who has always prided himself on his strength and power.

Transformation: By the end, he feels a deep, conflicting mix of guilt and anger, not just at the world but at himself. This experience plants a seed of doubt in his mind about his past actions and future ambitions.

Twilight Princess Ganondorf

Initial Reaction:

Stoic Acceptance: Twilight Princess Ganondorf would meet the sentence with a cold, stoic expression. He sees it as another trial to overcome.

Pride: Despite this, there's a flicker of doubt about the fate of his people that he has long suppressed.

Thoughts & Feelings Throughout:

Confronting the Truth: When he learns that his followers were tortured and slaughtered, but the rest of the Gerudo were merely banished, his anger towards Hyrule is momentarily eclipsed by confusion and relief.

New Alliances: Seeing the Gerudo forming alliances with tribes like the Zuna in the Desert of Doubt, thriving in their way, challenges his perception of their fate.

Internal Struggle: He feels a mix of pride and shame. Pride that his people survived and adapted, shame for having failed them and believing them all to be dead.

Renewed Purpose: By the end, Twilight Princess Ganondorf feels a profound sense of duty to truly lead his people, to ensure their safety and prosperity, even if it means changing his approach.

Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf

Initial Reaction:

Defiance: Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf would react with defiance, viewing the sentence as a challenge to his authority and power.

Curiosity: Despite this, there is a part of him that is curious about the current state of his people.

Thoughts & Feelings Throughout:

Resistance: His initial interactions with the Gerudo are marked by attempts to assert his dominance and control.

Reality Check: As he sees the Gerudo working hard to survive and thrive, he starts to see the consequences of his actions not just in terms of power but in human terms.

Softening: He gradually begins to appreciate their resilience and strength, feeling a growing sense of responsibility.

Commitment: By the end, Hyrule Warriors Ganondorf feels a renewed commitment to his people, vowing to be a better leader, not just a conqueror.

Tears of the Kingdom Ganondorf

Initial Reaction:

Resentment: Tears of the Kingdom Ganondorf would react with deep resentment, viewing the sentence as a betrayal by both Hyrule and his people.

Confusion: The notion that the Gerudo might be doing well without him would be both confusing and infuriating.

Thoughts & Feelings Throughout:

Initial Shock: Seeing the Gerudo as an ally nation, respected and maintaining their cultural identity, challenges everything he believed.

Shame: Learning that the Gerudo feel responsible for him and ashamed of his actions is a deep blow to his pride.

Deep Reflection: He faces intense inner turmoil, realizing the gravity of his actions and their impact on his people.

Redemption: By the end, Tears of the Kingdom Ganondorf feels a deep need for redemption. He vows to make amends, not through power and conquest but through genuine leadership and support for his people.

Demise

Initial Reaction:

Rage: Demise would react with intense rage, seeing the sentence as a challenge to his inherent power and authority.

Disdain: He views the Gerudo as tools for his ambitions, and the idea of understanding their struggles is beneath him.

Thoughts & Feelings Throughout:

Resistance: His interactions are marked by attempts to reassert his dominance and control over the Gerudo.

Unyielding: Unlike the others, Demise's initial disdain and anger rarely waver. He struggles to see the value in understanding his people’s plight.

Gradual Realization: Only through persistent exposure to their suffering and resilience does he begin to feel a grudging respect.

Inner Conflict: By the end, Demise feels an internal conflict between his desire for power and a newfound, albeit reluctant, understanding of the true consequences of his actions. This does not lead to a change in his ambitions, but it does plant a seed of doubt and a sense of responsibility that he cannot entirely ignore.

Conclusion

Each Ganondorf and Demise would experience a journey of emotional and mental turmoil, grappling with the consequences of their actions on the Gerudo people. This experience would challenge their perceptions, forcing them to confront their responsibilities and the impact of their actions. While some may be more inclined towards genuine change and redemption, others might remain conflicted, struggling between their inherent desires for power and the newfound understanding of their people's suffering.

[ca-suffit]

Ok so i don't think that the other anon was wrong to ask about the use of the word "gremlin". despite it being from the books, there are plenty of people from the audience who have never read them (and probably never will) and still see the image of a brown man with dark skin tone being referred to in that way. it's very understandable that not everyone who watches the show is going to be comfortable with that.

there's also a way for fans to clarify this, without being rude and invalidating the concerns from other viewers as us "making things up to be angry about". it's easy to see why people, especially poc in this fandom don't enjoy interacting with gatekeepers who deny racism when at least three major characters (louis, claudia, armand) have been adapted as poc. you can not separate their life experiences from how their race is perceived in america or europe. some of you are going to have a hard time in this fandom if you think you can just sidestep or brush these type of conversations under the rug.

thank u for this ask. it's unbelievably hostile in this fandom and it's so much worse when u have an account that focuses solely on race within the story and this fandom's racism. every fandom has racism issues but this one is *fucking awful* for some rly specific reasons. I saw what it did before having an account but having one and being on this end of it is worse. part of what used to get sent to me was asking why I don't contribute more than just "whining." who wants to do anything here tbh?? I'm surprised anyone's even here. I already know a huge majority of the fandom is not in the tags and it's exactly bcuz of this shit. we had a lot of v antiblack harassment campaigns roll thru here too. this fandom fucking sucks.

I also appreciate your last comment, although I have to say to it that this fandom pushes off conversations about race all the time. nalyra_dreaming and virginiaisforvampires and a whole group of accounts ppl talk to much more than this one are always giving ppl excuses for why noticing race isn't important. it is the norm here. ppl buy into it more too bcuz it's fans of color saying it as well, not just white fans. the show has not been helping this lately either by not commenting on the racial aspects of the plot anymore, making it v easy for fans to further say "these ppl who talk about this all the time are delusional, don't listen to them, they're the *real* racists!"

anyway. all of that being said. I have pdfs of all the books and I searched the word "gremlin" and couldn't find it in any of them. it's not a rly important thing or anything but since u mentioned it IS in the books, do u remember an actual source? I'm just curious and asking genuinely. maybe it was a related short story, article, or fb post?

I do have familiarity myself with the fandom from before the show and I made no connection to this either, it's been news to me that his nickname was "gremlin." I'm not doubting that, btw, I'm just saying that even for ppl around before I don't think it's even known outside some specific circles. but ya. either way, gatekeeping and mocking ppl who ask questions, especially questions that aim to be aware of potential racial issues, is not helping anything.

[cavewretch]

I would live to hear more of your roier thoughts, both character and creator wise, but I understand if you're too tired with mcyt and the content format for that. just think that the recent post you wrote was incredibly interesting and would be very curious for more.

like apart from general thoughts on roier both character and streamer, what specifically would you be curious to hear him explain about his character?

helloooo!!! don't worry i'd love to say more i haven't mentally escaped cubitos yet lmfao. i'm glad you thought so, anon!! :3

i'd love to hear roier's thoughts on roleplay in general (how he approaches it or prepares for it) bc he's so subtle and long term with his character. i'm curious how intentional he is with his performance too. like of course it's all mostly improvised so his actions aren't usually planned, but his actions in-character build up beautifully. like him in-character hiding that he's good at pvp and then revealing he's actually one of the strongest fighters on the island - that was a months long character choice that he couldn't even guarantee would pay off! or when after bobby's death he stopped doing dungeons for fun, but would immediately snap into fighter mode when he had to if it meant protecting the others. (off the top of my head i'm thinking of the cellbit and felps rescue mission and the code sword mission).

idek if he thinks about roleplay this deliberately but he's gotta have some sort of qroier brainspace constructed bc of how things have progressed, no? like, at risk of being unbearable, yeah it's minecraft but it's also theater lmfao

(also tangent but roier's playstyle for most games i've seen him play is offense, he quickly evaluates a little and then launches into situations headfirst, so it's interesting to watch that translate into a defensive role)

anyways more specifically bc i feel like i haven't even answered ur question yet fjshdjshf - to roier, about qroier: does he want to know his past? does he get frustrated with how he's perceived by the other islanders? what keeps him from correcting people? how does roier decide when qroier's angry enough to show it? to me, qroier's breaking points are betrayal and the people he loves- what does he believe about himself that keeps his personal safety and pride from that list? ALSO this is less important to story im just curious- melissa started as a disguise to manipulate quackity but has sort of evolved into a drag persona, why does he refuse to tell people he and melissa are the same person? (i imagine its to keep the secret from getting to quackity or keeping it as another secret asset in his back pocket but i wanna hear him talk about it)

and finally to roier - if he could retcon anything in qsmp what would he retcon and why hehehe

i thought purgatory would be a breaking point for qroier, and it was in some ways (i'm no longer a clown, i'm no longer joking, actually fuck all this lets burn all our stuff to force system change) but the consequences are so blurry it seems like qroier had to shrink back a bit into lying in wait (FOR WHAT???) once they returned to the island/he was handed pepito. disclaimer tho i haven't watched any qsmp since the end of purgatory i've just read posts and talked w my sister who still watches it

this got out of hand - i hope i answered your question!!!

[helle-bored]

For me one of the issues with being neurodivergent is that I've always struggled tremendously with the concept of "good enough". 

Most people who've tried to help me with this have treated it like a perfectionism issue, and it kind of is, but not in the way they think. It isn't that I have a clear concept of expectations and think I need to exceed them; it's that I almost NEVER have a clear concept of expectations and don't know where I'm allowed to stop...so I just keep going until it seems like no reasonable person (me) could find any flaw in it.

When I was in my first semester of grad school, my advisor told me my papers were approaching a postgrad level, and he used one as an example for my peers (and made some of said peers cry because they were panicked about the expectation of having to write like that).

And I said to my advisor, "Hey, did you know even just the short 300-500 word essays you're having me write are taking me 4-6 hours? And I'm getting burnt out." 

And he said, "Well, it should only take you half an hour."

And I was like, "Ok, cool. You've said I'm writing above my cohort's level. What should I cut out or do differently? Because I've read the assignment instructions but I really don't understand expectations very well and I'm having difficulty knowing what is good enough."

And that fucker!! looked me in the eyes!! and said: "Oh, keep writing at the same level, just don't take so much time doing it."

!!! the fuck !!!

...I think he thought he was making things easier for me? Somehow? But in reality, I felt like I was being punished for my perfectionism, because now I was expected to overachieve but in a quarter of the time. 

Anyway, I still don't really understand what "good enough" means, and regularly have to corner my boss and say, "Hey, can you clarify what you want?" --because otherwise I won't know where to stop.

And it's absolutely wild, but I think this trait is perceived as an "area for personal growth" in corporate environments -- because you're supposed to be able to just... know what's good enough without having someone tell you. And I fuckin hate it? I hate how needing concrete expectations is seen as immature somehow? 

And I hate how it's been perceived as primarily driven by perfectionist anxiety by the people around me, when (unlike with anxiety, which often doesn't have an addressable cause, and instead pops up elsewhere once you fix it in one place like a game of whack-a-mole) there IS a clear solution for it that makes this particular type of anxiety go away, and that solution is... clear concrete expectations and metrics for success, so that I know what to do and what my goal is.

I'm very curious if this is something other ND people struggle with, because oh man does it make me feel alienated and burnt out sometimes.