#assassins being dorks

[portalsofatheria]

~Stones and Glass Houses~ Marvel x DC fanfic (Damian Wayne x Stark!Reader)

~Book 1~

Brooklyn Stark, was born in the Red Room and trained to be the perfect Black Widow until she escaped at the age of 7. Now at the age of 16, she is the only biological daughter of Tony Stark, a Shield agent, and an Avenger in training. She has opened up her heart to a new family made up of superheroes and new friends that she never expected to have. The one thing Brook’s life lacks is love, which in Brook’s case is a blessing. Romantic love is for fools, and she has enough on her plate trying to traverse this new life without it. Damian Wayne, now 16, is the only biological son of Bruce Wayne, the feared Batman. He is an ex-assassin and the heir to not only the Wayne fortune, but also the League of Assassins.

Damian has turned his back on the League and all it stands for, fully embracing what it means to be a superhero and wearing the Robin insignia. He has a loving family that tends to smother him, few friends, and animals that he cherishes. Despite his outward uncaring aloofness, Damian is content with his life and his future. He doesn’t need romantic attachments like the majority of his siblings, and unfortunately, his father have succumbed to.

Hero and vigilante masks aside, the Waynes and Starks are known for their epic rivalry and hatred of each other that has only gotten worse from generation to generation, so it is no surprise that it is hate at first sight between Brook and Damian when they finally meet.

However, the two teens keep finding themselves thrown together as they, along with every other superhero in the world, try to keep the streets safe from new dangerous alien weapons and crazed supervillains. The two heroes discover that they have a lot more in common than they first thought, but is this newfound bond worth their parents' wrath? Can hate really turn to love?

AO3 link here.

Released Chapter Count: 98 (09/07/2023)

Word count:  774,792

Status: COMPLETE (undergoing revisions)

~BOOK 2~

AO3 link is here

Released Chapter count: 51 (09/07/2023)

Word Count: 444,052

Status: Ongoing

(Please don’t plagiarize my work)

[teecupangel]

Regarding that young!Basim pic... Imagine Yggdrassil doing a derp and that resulting in Eivor getting dropped in Bagdad while Basim was still a twink. The first issue she faces? The fact she has a Hidden Blame on her arm. The second issue? Runnin amock of said twink Basim

So, since we’re talking about twink!Basim, we are talking about Basim before he became a Hidden One, right? I’m just imagining Eivor getting dropped into the men that were about to kick the living shit out of Basim and Roshan just stares in confusion as this heavily armed white person just dropped from the sky just when she was about to save the thief.

So now, you have Eivor who is confused af and also, oh, people trying to kill her, what else is new? So she starts fighting them and Roshan gets into the fight because Eivor was focused on killing soldiers while Basim is being a pathetic wet kitty that’s super confused and… pretty much drenched in blood right now so really wet kitty. One of the soldiers almost got to him if it hadn’t been for Roshan and she tells Basim to run. Eivor says she’ll catch up and Roshan and Basim run while Eivor does what she does best…

Kill everyone trying to kill her.

By the time she was done, Roshan and Basim were gone and she needed a place to hide so she goes the other way without realizing it.

Roshan would find her later on and Eivor wouldn’t know her (because, narratively, I think it would be better if Eivor does Roshan’s sidequest in ACV after the main story is complete) but would recognize that she’s a Hidden One. Roshan would notice her hidden blade and she’d ask which branch she’s from, maybe even ask if she’s from the England branches.

Eivor tells her the truth because, as far as she knows, she just got transported to a different location and not… a different time.

It’s only when she meet Basim as a novice does she realize that she has traveled back in time.

Unorganized Notes:

Eivor would have to change her clothes. That bloodbath had plastered her usual outfit all over Baghdad and she even got a dreadful title like “The Butcher” or the “The Madwoman of Red” or something.

This gives us an excuse for Eivor to wear a more Hidden One-inspired outfit!

Basim has a crush on Eivor. It’s half ‘I developed an adoration for you because you saved me’ and half ‘you can kill me with a single blow and I’m apparently into that’.

Eivor sees it but she also sees Basim as being too young for her so she… usually just ignores it or laughs it off.

Roshan ain’t going to poke that with a twelve-foot pole. She ain’t got no time for that puppy love sideplot.

Eivor doesn’t join the Hidden Ones but she does cooperate with them. She’s trying to find a way back to her time and she thinks the answer is somewhere in Baghdad because that’s where she had been dropped off after all.

Usually she just ends up getting roped into Basim’s shenanigans because Basim sees her and gravitates towards her.

Loki would probably notice that Eivor is Odin’s Sage because she’s not supposed to be in this place and that reeks of Isu bs that Loki knows of. Basim’s crush on her is purely Basim though but Loki’s memories would start messing with that as well.

[violetwolfraven]

Everybody keeps being like excited to see Callum trying to win Runaan over and meanwhile I’m just like

I want to see Runaan meet Ezran.

This is a child he signed up to help kill two years ago, and I imagine assassin man is going to have to go through an “oh shit, this kid is like. a really good kid. and if i had killed him peace between katolis and xadia probably never would have happened.” and try to figure out how to apologize.

And meanwhile Ezran is going to have to figure out if his “everyone deserves a chance to choose a different path” philosophy extends to the man who killed his father.

While his home is literally in ashes from Sol Regem’s attack.

Like yes I want to watch Callum be a dork around his girlfriend’s dad, but tbh I’m more curious about how they’re going to handle the reality that Runaan very much did kill Harrow. Like that is definitely a thing he did.

[catastrophicalcat]

Reasons Valmont Sucks (Catwoman 2018)

Valmont was a terrible character. And I really want to dissect why and how he is terrible - not just to get it off my chest and onto the collective Internet, but also because I think that Howard made some questionable writing choices that doomed him.

A quick intro - Valmont is Selina's love interest from the 1st two arcs of Tini Howard's Catwoman (2018) run. Inspired by some version of the Dangerous Liaisons character, he is a quasi French assassin who appears in Selina's life when she is trying to take on the Five Gotham Crime families, stalks her a bit, gifts her a stolen cat, fucks her, and eventually get murdered by her while he's trying to kill Batman. BatCat are on a poorly defined break during these events (with Bruce clearly thinking that they're somewhat committed to each other). Valmont is a dork. He looks like this:

More stuff under the break since I don't know how to write succinctly...

Valmont is a possessive stalker. It's obvious that Howard wanted to create a character who is different from Batman. Just look at him - Batman wears black, Valmont wears white. Batman strives to be a good person, while Valmont is an unrepentant murder. Bruce tries to be a gentlemen, while Valmont.... Almost immediately, Howard is in a pickle - how can she recreate a 17th century romance about assholes when, at the moment her run begin, Selina has no reason to be into this guy? And, this phony goth poser, by definition, cannot be upfront and just ask Selina out. Bruce would have done that. He's not Bruce. Solution? She gets rescued by him. A lot. Some examples:

While getting rescued frequently may be a way to fall in love, it makes Selina just so incompetent. Like I think that almost every single issue where Valmont appears, she needs to gets saved by him in some fashion. I don't think that Bruce rescued her that often, at least not in her own run! I went from reading about a savvy cat-burglar to an eternal damsel-in-distress.

Maybe I missed it, but I literally just read through all of his issues to find these screencaps, and I can't find any reason for him to be there other than to stalk her....

2. Making sexy French man is hard, OK! Prior to this run, I did not realize just how hard it is to write a sexy man instead of a creepy man. But seriously, this guy is GROSS, and Selina being into him makes her come off as dumb floozy. Who in the world would get turned on by lines like:

Maybe I'm fascinating, Catwoman. (Spoiler - he isn't)

I consider myself a citizen of the world. (Is he "my parents live in Ohio, I live in the moment" Ted Mosby?)

I wanted to help. But I did not want to chase you, or do what those boys had done. So I simply waited, where I knew you could find me. ("Those boys" - Tim & Dick, who tried to offer reasonable assistance and advice).

Fascinating? Interesting? Dangerous? (Describing himself.)

But I won't assume that just because a cat has sat in my lap once, it will do so whenever I call. (He then proceeds to bang her on the roof).

Have you ever had anyone encourage you to chase your desires? Just for your own pleasure? (Yeah, this is like a famous trait of hers...)

The sharp pleasure of waiting until I see you again is enough. (See, normal Selina - or a normal woman - would just never see him again).

Related to the above - their sexy times? Not sexy. First, they try and fail to hijack a cannibal's plane and parachute jump. Maybe adrenaline got their heart rate up, but still - poor planning! Second, and more egregiously: multiple characters comment on how Selina is deliriously tired. Valmont is one of those characters! He then bangs her on the roof. I don't want to kink-shame, but sleeping with someone when they're falling off their feet from exhaustion is like, not great?

3. He's a freaking murderer! This guy kills people and drops their bodies in the harbor. He's friends with Flamingo, a cannibal who tried to eat Robin (Damian, but still!). And yet, this is how Selina feels about him:

What happened? Really, what happened? Selina used to be smart and not boy crazy. Sure, she has a wide variety of unfortunate love interests despite these traits (post forthcoming!). But never has she fallen so fast, so quick, so off the deep end for someone who deserves it so very little.

I have other substantive issues with this run, but wanted to start by dissecting Valmont. A non-Bruce love interest is already an uphill battle in a Catwoman comic. Burdening him with all of these negative traits did not lead to a good story. Instead, Selina came off as stupid and immature for ever liking this guy in the first place.

I know that this post was super negative - these are just my thoughts, and I'm open to critique. If folks feel positive about Valmont, or other things I touched on here, I would be really interested to hear it.

[beautifulterriblequeen]

S7 Runaan

I gotta look at him. I gotta look. What's he got

ONE:

His hair is still dungeony. He hasn't redone it. Is he expecting to meet Ethari soon and he just wants his husband's hands in his hair again, like always? Is he grossed out by his dungeon hair and doesn't want to touch it? Is he ashamed of his long assassin hair? (put it in a bun, sir!) Has he just. forgotten it's there. Dork.

His hair is waiting for Ethari, that's all there is to it.

TWO:

HE HAS A SHIRT. MY BOY. Runaan deserves dignity. It looks like a very Moonshadow shirt, navy blue and gray with swirls all over it. He's rolled up the sleeves, which is extremely hot of him. And it is a bit short at the waist, too (thank you TDP for that visible slice of Runaan's hip).

Headcanon: this is Lujanne's Rayla's own shirt and it's nice and tight and a bit too small for Runaan's tall rangy body but he'll take it because it's soft and comfy and better than nothing.

THREE:

Runaan isn't carrying his bowblade. We know Rayla has it, somewhere. Which means he is choosing not to carry it/be seen with it, in Katolis. He's making a choice to come with empty hands instead of a weapon, hoping not to be stabbed or shot on sight. Good luck with that, my man, they will NOT be happy to see you. But what else can you do to begin your amends?

I think Rayla might still have it somewhere, ready for him to use in a sudden moment of danger, but he could be doing the same thing Viren did with his staff. Viren didn't want to pick up the relic staff again because of what it represented to him - his own self, darker, harder, and making choices that hurt people. Runaan's bowblade has the same kind of weight. He may have it close to hand, but he may not want to touch it, let alone wield it, anytime soon.

That's not to say he won't be forced into a situation where using his bowblade would make things better - but also worse. I mean, this is TDP.

FOUR:

The situation that's giving him this pose may be that exact situation already. He's recovered his Hard Assassin Eyes here, even though his hands are empty and Rayla is actively guarding him with her swords. They've run into someone, or something, that's threatening them, and Rayla has to take point on defense. And Runaan is letting her, at least in this specific moment.

Who have they met? Judging by events earlier in the show, it could be Amaya again, which would add the whole layer of an Amaya vs Rayla repeat showdown at the Banther Lodge. At this point, Amaya and Rayla have hugged and become friends, nearly family. But Amaya's whole job when the assassins came was to try to save Harrow - and she wasn't in time. Being back at this location would probably put her in a very particular mood, and I don't think it'll clash well with Runaan's presence. Not at all.

Will I be getting my long-wished-for fight between Amaya and Runaan? Even if it's interrupted and no one is truly hurt, I would LOVE to see them go at each other. Their tactics are so different, I just want to see a silly lil skirmish, plssss.

FIVE:

Pure speculation here, but it's possible that Amaya and Janai flew Ezran to Katolis to help - since their hotcats are here with him against what looks to be human architecture. And then Amaya departed from Ezran's location to the Banther Lodge, possibly for supplies for the wounded and survivors. Leading to this second screenshot serving as Amaya bringing Runaan back with Rayla, and we get to see the mixed expressions of these characters. Callum's in particular - Rayla would not be parted from Runaan willingly, so she could still be standing beside him, possibly arrested with him, and Callum has to stand behind his brother the king and see her trying to defend the indefensible, her stabby dad who killed Ezran's stabby dad.

I'm adding a few more grains of sand to the scales in favor of it being Runaan because of this other screenshot from S6, which turned out to be him facing down Viren - another adult who helped ruin his life.

Anyway, whatever happens here, we will see it in four months! FOUR MONTHS UNTIL RUNAAN WITH A SHIRT Y'ALL AAAAHH

[currentfandomkick]

Fan concept to incorporate however you want:

In comics i’m pretty sure there’s a lazarus pit in the batcave, and others in gotham. A high concentration of lazarus water per square foot. Add to that gotham’s various contaminated waters from various toxins and gases on top of usual run offs, and there’s a high chance everyone in gotham is contaminated by all of this.

Add in the popular head cannons and partial fanon of lazarus water = (in some form) contaminated or corrupted watery ectoplasm.

And if we go ecto contaminated enough = liminal…

Then gotham city is full of liminals, the most notorious being a handful revenants with questionable cores (Solomon Grundy and Red Hood off the top of my head), with Damian’s Robin a liminal bordering on halfa if you go the ‘raised next to and put in the Pitts’ route.

Hell if you want, most of the Batfam can be partially ecto contaminated if not liminal (minus Duke, i feel like he’s the only starting to) but no one notices because its gradual and they assume its side effects from the 10,000 + polluntants in gotham.

You can have anyone from Amity Park enter Gotham and go ‘huh, edgy aesthetic Amity.’ Then go ‘oh, sick liminal… which dork back home knows how to fix this?’

If you want Tucker can be sending Sam updates on Gotham’s liminals (including Rogues) which Sam is helping the ecto terrorist (League of Assassins in a lot of older portrayals) and Danny vibing working for (DC bigshot or group of your choice) as an engineer who says he’s bad at coding when no one has broken his code yet as ‘its standard back home’ and baffles his employer

Dani can see Gotham and just. Vibe as a feral child who tries to help the other sick liminals with mixed results. I say let Harley snag her as her sidekick during her anti-villian days.

Jazz can be attending university and has to explain drinking filtered ecto to her dorm, only for a lot of them to start managing things better emotionally and combat wise, but now have the urge to Kick Ass as a way to Make Friends. Batfam investigate her a s a cult leader when really all she’s doing is using a clean ecto filter and teaching her classmates to do the same. Even teaches them how to make them thanks to Danny breaking down his rigs to her and leaving her repair instructions in case hers breaks early.

If you go baby Ghost King Danny, he can find out about Gotham and do a ‘oh, a fucked up version of Amity Park. Neat!’ see the Joker and go ‘Fuck this guy,’ and appear by pulling Joker into the ghost realm for his trial with a note that reads “sorry for missing another Liminal City. I’ll do better as king and handle those breaking Ghost Ettiquette myself. My bad. Still new to the ‘King of the Infinite Realms and all bonded to it. So liminals fall in, didn’t think there were more besides Amity. A branch of the Council of Observers will be sent to evaluate which liminals are sick, which are dealing with unsustainable or harmful obsessions, which liminals need relocation to handle their obsession in a better suited environment, and which ones are uneducated on liminal health.

Don’t worry, I stole some time to make sure i did all the paperwork before taking this guy. He’s the type of ecto entity who consumes attention, fear, and souls, which is Pretty Bad and that last one is an auto-execution. So i should manage the normal ‘visiting of the realms and introduction to’ spiel after we can make sure you won’t be in danger from ghosts that forget mortals dont shrug off being dropped off a few cliffs and having a two ton rock dropped on them. I may send some ambassadors from Amity to help you adjust since it was a pain for us too. Fyi if anyone tries summoning the Ghost King and expects Pariah, i win by conquest ten years ago and only JUST got to looking into liminal areas. With cheating by stealing time. If you have any questions, look up the Manson family, Amity Park, Ohio. Sam can explain better than me, and her parents somehow ended up on the mortal side counsel.

[messenger-of-stupidity]

William thoughts hehe

I listened to it in art class today and accidentally started drawing his crown icon in the corner.

Anyways

His accent (even when redone by Erik) still itches my brain.

But, the fact he split up the explanations was pretty smart. He recognizes that Sam and Vincent are different. Sam is more comfortable with himself, holding less doubt about the person that he is than Vincent is. Vincent has had so much character development. So has Sam of course, but not from the same 180 personality shift Vincent has.

Vincent used to be our flirty-shoes-on-bed vampire. Now he's a dork who has a thing for crowns (COUGH COUGH). So William realized that Vincent would have more questions than Sam did and wanted to have a space for Vincent to ask all those questions. As for whether or not I think Vincent will leave...

No. I don't think he will. I do think he'll try to push more diplomatic solutions to the issues that rise up. Maybe, since Porter has been labeled as the hitman for the clan, Vincent will take charge over diplomacy. He certainly knows how to handle people if given some time to prepare. I could see Vincent and Lovely being the first resort, and if that doesn't work, Porter (and prolly Alexis) get involved. We know imperium Alexis isn't above bloodshed, so some of that has to transfer over to Canon. This way, Vincent can live knowing that they tried peaceful resolutions first. And, like a lot of other people are saying, he's too closely tied. Lovely and Vincent's whole sense of community lives within the clan. The Shaw pack are friends, but the clan is their family. If they stopped being Solaires, they would kind of be loners. No matter what William says about always being welcome.

But Sam.

Sam is absolutely leaving. He asked the questions he needed, and got the answers that came with them. He's already closer with the pack, having game nights and vacations and celebrations with them. David has told him he's family (I'm pretty sure). He even has some inside jokes now. Something I'm not sure he has with his clan. He'll definitely stay friends with Vincent, and always be grateful to William for distancing Alexis from him.

But being part of the clan seems to be painful for him. He doesn't enjoy any of the clan gatherings (Vincent takes some enjoyment from them, since he was looking forward to spending the summit with Lovely. Sam was not excited to go, even with Darlin and some of the Shaw pack coming) and is only close to Vincent and William. Plus his "That's all I need to know" totally sounded like a "Farewell then". He knew there was an option to leave, and with another sense of community waiting for him, he's going to take it.

Plus, he never took the Solaire name. I'm sure William offered it, but he didn't take it. Vincent did.

I am curious about how David is going to react to this. William invited his pack to a gathering where he had a double assassination carried out. And there's some tension between the older vampires and werewolves, so no matter how small of a chance there was, David's pack could have been blamed simply because of outdated prejudice.

Even if that didn't happen, it's not like David wants Angel anywhere near something dangerous. Like a potential vampire fight breaking out. We know how seriously David takes protecting his pack. I wanna see the conversation David has with William for putting his pack in a position to be involved indirectly with what happened.

[skierisa]

"but where's her werewolf form?" IM STUPID I CANT DRAW IT PROPERLY AAAAA SO SORRY

but anywayyyyyy, the basics but more detailed:

Full name: Valerie Yuhara Akagawa (her realm's culture allows her to have more than one last name, but usually referred by her second last name by most)

Age: 23

Birthday: April 26th

Sexuality: Panromantic greysexual

Species: Werewolf

Elemental Powers: Crystal Elemental Power

Occupation: Assassin and captain for MVRR (Mort Vivant du Riviere Rouge) gang.

Personality: Valerie was always outspoken and would speak up for other people and herself, having little to no filter, sometimes on purpose. Occasionally, Valerie likes to make people uncomfortable, but not always and it's usually when they're trespassing some limit she imposed. She can read people well and usually knows when someone is hiding something or lying, and tends to manipulate them to get what she wants (which doesn't mean it's a bad thing, she mostly uses it to discover what people want as gifts for birthdays and other festivities). 

When it comes to meeting new people, Valerie tends to be closed, but gives enough information to keep a conversation if she judges the situation to be the right one, and opens herself more and more if she's feeling safe. She can certainly be gentle and empathic, but mostly hides and avoids these feelings due to the kind of work she does. However, she easily attaches herself to those she likes.

After the events that happened to her twin sister Vanessa, Valerie entered a gang, which altered her personality a bit. She likes cracking jokes, but in her late teens it became a coping mechanism, like her enjoyment of discomfort of others. Although, she feels a lot of guilt that she shoves down, having panic attacks and mostly being in a bad mood due to lack of sleeping (due to stress).

Story: Valerie was born in one of the realms outside of Ninjago. She was born into a very loving family that she really adores. Her mother Aurore and aunt Yurisa taught her all she knows about music, flourishing her musical intelligence, while her dad made her and her siblings clothes. She was a very outspoken and filterless from a young age, annoying other people sometimes unintentionally, like her teachers.

She discovered her elemental powers as a tween, after her sister, Vanessa, woke up and yelled about crystals growing in their bedroom. Somewhere around this time, she took interest in war fan fighting.

Her brother, Kenichi, is the founder of the MVRR, making her the captain as soon as she decided to join.

(there are lacking parts, I'm just gonna hide it for a while because I wanna make a comic...)

TRIVIA AND HEADCANONS!

Likes hot drinks;

Pyrophobic;

Smokes, but not exactly addicted to nicotine;

Wants to be a music teacher;

Not a fan of wind instruments;

Favourite instrument to play is the kotō;

Still uses the iron fans given to her by Kenichi when she was 16;

Likes spending time with Nya as she works on her projects and Valerie plays random tunes on her guitar;

Doesn't stay near Wyldfyre or Kai (again, pyrophobic, but actually likes both those dorks);

Has a weakness for blonds;

Loves reading horror romance and horror comics.;

Knows kulning singing technique (her favourite);

She has a (slight) British accent.

Her siblings will get ref sheets sometime later this year or 2025, who knows, right

[inneedofsupervision]

The Big Bad Wolf And The Itsy Bitsy Spider

As you can read above, I've got a prompt. I took the liberation to alter it since I'm not comfortable writing "reader insert" fics, so here you go with some Bucky, Steve and Peter being dorks and bonding over snow I guess?

Summary: It takes some level of boldness to attempt a snowball assassination of Captain America and the former Winter Solider, but someone has to be the one to throw the first snowball and step onto the thin line that divides braveness from recklessness.

(Or, how Peter thought it would be fun to annoy two super soldiers)

Read on Ao3

"On your left!"

"You've got to be kidding me."

Bucky grimaces at Steve's voice penetrating his ear, breaking the peaceful silence. He blinks a straying snowflake out of his eye before glaring at the back of Steve's head. When did the punk catch up to him? He doesn't try to suppress the urge to roll his eyes at his friend speeding up to jog a few meters ahead, shoulders shaking in poorly hidden laughter. Bucky should have shoved Steve out of the cold and locked the door like Sam suggested when the other asked if he wanted to join him on the running track. The snow-covered running track, he might add. Bucky effortlessly catches up to Steve and shoves him, snickering as it causes the other to stumble, clearly unprepared for getting hit in the side by solid vibranium. Steve huffs, quickly collecting himself before starting to level up from his jog to straight-up running, passing Bucky but not without pushing him in retaliation.

Yes, they are very mature for their age.

"I liked you better before the serum. You've become a show-off, Steve!" shouts Bucky after him before he starts falling into a faster pace. 

"Someone's gotta keep you in check, Buck," answers Steve, and Bucky frowns at the smug grin the blond's carrying. It is just like back then, Steve acting like a little prick. Not that he wasn't happy he could actually go for a run with his friend without the anxiety of an upcoming asthma attack sitting in the back of his mind. Steve just got a little too overconfident for Bucky's taste. 

"Like the little punk he is," mumbles the man as he watches Steve running, probably sporting a grin like usual when he gets to pass Bucky. He played with the thought of running up and shoving the man into the piles of snow lying next to the running track. He decides against it. Being friends with the man for years, Bucky figures it would end up in petty revenge plotting, and he didn't want to spend much more time in the snow than he needed to.

"You're not sleeping, are you, Bucky?" teases Steve, still running in front of him. They are reaching the end of the track when Bucky feels the overwhelming need to throw a snowball at his friend's head. Bucky bends down mid-run and collects a handful of white fluff from the ground, skillfully forming a dense ball. He was acting childish, but damn it, his toes felt like they froze off. Steve deserves at least that for dragging him outside at six in the morning at 24,8 Fahrenheit. Just because he was frozen once doesn't mean he enjoys staying out in the middle of winter in the daytime when the sun decides to grace the horizon. The man straightens up, hand drawn back and ready to smack his little work of art against Steve's back of the head when someone beats him to it. 

The ex-assassin's eyebrows shot upwards as he only caught the movement from the corner of his eyes. Before he could call for Steve to watch out, the snow projectile already hit its goal, the force great enough to let the ball crumple into pieces. Bucky grimaces in sympathy as a fair share of snow runs down the blond's neck and into his sweater, probably completing its mission to soak the backside of his shirt with icy water and causing it to stick against his skin in the most annoying way possible. 

A thick silence settles onto the running track as Steve's hand slowly reaches upward to get the snow out of his hair and off his skin. Blue eyes cold as ice pin Bucky in place. Bucky finds himself backing away slightly.

"So that's how you like to play, sore loser," says Steve, but the glint in his eyes betrays the soft tone of his voice. Bucky let out a short cough. Not because he was trying to buy some time and avoid answering Steve. 

It's not like he was intimidated by that punk or anything. 

Bucky inconspicuously glances towards the compound, measuring the distance between himself and the entrance. He drags his eyes back to the blond.

"Steve, I swear that wasn't me."

Steve gives him a pointed look.

"And what's that?" the other asks, nodding towards him. Bucky looks down and draws his eyebrows together as he catches sight of his hand still holding onto the snowball. 

Well, that certainly looks misleading.

"I know how this could come off as, but-"

"Good, we are on the same page then, Buck." interrupts Steve.

Bucky swallows as the blond starts pulling his sleeves up and going as far as to crack his knuckles. Oh, that dreaded smile. That smile tells you Steve Rogers wouldn't let go of this. Why did he have to befriend this punk again? If anyone asks, Bucky denies having taken a step back. He tries again to reason with his friend, squinting his eyes as Steve bends down to grab a fistful of snow.

"Steve, I didn't throw that thing."

"And I'm not about to push you face-first into the snow."

Bucky let out a frustrated groan. Steve was already closing the gap between them, and he wasn't close to taking a listen to his reasoning. It leaves Bucky questioning, where did that snowball even come from?  

Bucky was too old to wrestle in the snow. Literally. Why did this kind of thing have to happen to him? The man holds his hands up in defense, ready to go and push the other off if he needs to, when another snowball flies at the pair of super-soldiers.

This time, it hits Bucky.

Right in the face.

The explosion of ice transforms into cold wetness trickling down his jaw, chin, and neck before sickering into the fabric of his training shirt as the snow melts instantly on his slightly above-human-average heated skin. 

Without a word, he slowly reaches upwards and wipes the snow that has begun to melt out of his eyes. His face turns into a deep scowl as Steve's hearty laughter carries over to him.

"Stop laughing. I swear, I shove this in your face, Steve!"

Bucky narrows his eyes at the blond, still holding onto the snowball and contemplating throwing it in the blond's face but deciding against it. Before that, he has to figure out who would dare to throw a snowball at him. Bucky had to give the silent shooter credit. It took him a few moments to spot him. If it weren't for the slight color difference of the light gray accent on the guy's shoes, he wouldn't have spotted him in his thoroughly white outfit, blending in quite well into a blanket of snow. Successfully creeping up and keeping out of sight from not one but two trained super-soldiers was not an easy feat. Steve is busy chuckling when Bucky slowly puts a finger to his lips, signaling him to be quiet. Steve raises an eyebrow, and Bucky slowly turns his head, jerking it towards their silent visitor. His friend catches on quickly, and Bucky can tell by the minimal widening of Steve's eyes that the latter has spotted the hidden shooter. The two soldiers held a wordless exchange of glances and came to a silent agreement before Steve let the snow fall from his hands.

"Let's go back inside. It's too cold if we're only standing around."

"Sure. Wouldn't want you to turn into Stevie the Snowman."

Steve rolls his eyes before walking up to Bucky, sending him a silent nod. 

They start walking, pretending to end their little workout, and leave the running track. Steve's eyes hang on the lump of "snow" lying next to the track as they approach from the side. When the two reached the same high as the uninvited visitor, Bucky's left foot took a side step, shifting as he twisted his hip, repositioning his body weight. In a split second, his metal arm shoots forward, throwing the snowball with all his might at the person lying in the snow. The two men watch with more fascination than surprise how the well-camouflaged figure rolls to the side with a shriek, snow-projectile hitting and leaving a rather impressive hole in the snow pile where the person's head had been a moment before. The previously silent attacker is quick on his feet. His move to the side brought a small distance between him and the soldiers before coming to a halt in an uncannily familiar crouching pose. The person who had successfully kept their identity hidden until now slowly raises their head. Steve's lips twitch upwards on instinct while Bucky narrows his eyes at the sight of brown curls hanging over equally brown eyes that sparkle in a mix of unmistakable mischief and amusement. 

"Hey, Steve. Hi Bucky."

Peter has the nerve to give a small cheeky wave in their direction, still crouching and looking not an ounce apologetic. The two adults watch, with slight confusion, how the teen's positive expression changes into a frown, leaving the two adults confused about what could have caused the sudden change in Peter's mood. Bucky watches him slowly straighten from his position on the ground. He wants to roll his eyes as he feels Steve twitching next to him, the worry-wart. He can sense Steve's need to ask the kid what was wrong. Peter surprises them by drawing closer to them, towards Bucky, to be more specific, a frown still present on his young face. Before Bucky can react, Peter stands on his tip-toes and reaches his hand out to carefully peel a crumble of snow out of a stray set of Bucky's dark hair. Brown eyes narrow at the sight of the snow in his hands before they settle on Bucky. The teen tilts his head to the side, almost as if he were confused if it weren't for the minuscule twitch of his lips, giving his poorly hidden amusement away.

"Sorry, you've got some snow there. Steve got you good, huh?"

Bucky's fists clenched at the sound of suppressed laughter from the blond to his right. He elbows Steve in the side before he glances back, only to meet the face of a mischievously grinning Peter Parker. He swears that kid is full of shit. But Bucky will be the last to laugh today after he shoves that kid in the nearest snow pile. He feels a grin tugging on his lips at the panic taking over the teen's features as he strides forward, right into Peter's personal space, ready to grab him.

 

His plan doesn't work as the teen, in one swift movement, manages to dive under the incoming metal arm that took a swing at him. With ease, the vigilante emerges behind the older man, a winning grin painting his features. But the euphoria of escaping a pissed-off Bucky Barnes lasts only a moment. Bucky grins as the teen lets out a shout of surprise at the pair of very fleshy and muscled arms, almost tackling him to the ground. 

The ex-assassin turns around, a taunt for the Spider sitting on his lips, but the words couldn't leave his mouth quick enough before the kid began moving again. Steve didn't know what was coming for him, as from one moment to the next, the Spider-Teen vanished from his vision by jumping up. Peter skillfully escapes the bear hug about to send him to the ground by leaping and pulling his feet up to his chest mid-jump, feet hovering over Steve's head for a moment. Steve grunted in surprise as a foot set down on his shoulder, and he could only glance up, catching a smug grin that the teen had to have learned from none other than Stark himself. Bucky could only watch how his best friend gets abused as the kid's personified springboard, Peter setting a foot down on Steve's shoulder and pushing himself forward to perform a neat somersault over the blond's head. The sheer force of the jump is enough to send Steve tumbling. While Steve takes a dive face-first into the snow, the teen lands with practiced ease on the balls of his feet, a self-satisfied grin on his face.

That little shit. 

Peter's smug expression switches into shock-widened eyes and a surprised squeak getting pushed out of the teen as a metal arm slings around the back of his knees before a shoulder crashes into him. Gloved hands flail around before finding hold of the thick textile of Bucky's jacket as Peter tries to push himself off where he got thrown over the man's shoulder. A laugh escapes the teen, the latter involuntarily rendered in watching the world from upside down. Bucky unconsciously grins at the sound before he lets go of Peter's legs. He grabs the teen's jacket with both hands, ready to haul him into the snow. His hands are firmly on the teen's waist, pulling with strength, but, for some unexplainable reason, Bucky couldn't lift the boy. The body on his shoulder wouldn't move an inch, only shifting slightly along with the movement of his jacket. A short moment passes before Bucky tilts his head to get a look at Peter's face, eyes squinting with accusation. 

"Are you sticking to me?"

The disgust in Bucky's voice sends Peter into a laughing fit, not having expected the sheer horror in the man's voice. He couldn't even form a coherent sentence from how much he was cackling while hanging over Bucky's shoulder, the latter still glaring at him. It wasn't easy to get a genuine reaction out of Bucky, the ex-assassin carrying a neutral expression most of the time if he wasn't scowling at someone or showing a smirk. The surprised tone of the super-soldier's voice, mixed with a spark of horror and disgust, had caught Peter off guard.

Bucky and Sam always reacted rather strongly at the display of Peter's most spider-like trait. Solely for that reason, he used his ability more than once just out of spite to annoy them. Their reactions are hilarious, and although they tell him to keep the "freakiness down a notch" while putting a hand over their chest in Sam's case and accusing him of trying to give them a heart attack, Peter finds himself not minding the teasing. As the youngest of the group, he often has to live with the jokes thrown his way. If sticking to the ceiling at three a.m. is a way to hand back some of their medicine, Peter gladly let go of the chance to get some sleep. The teen made it his challenge to get the two men used to his abilities, and if that meant he had to freak them out until they grew used to him sticking to stuff, then that's what he calls a win-win on his side. 

"You, Peter Parker, aren't as innocent as you pretend to be." 

That's what Mr. Stark had told him with an amused tug of his lips as he had to call someone to repair the hole in the living room, a keepsake from Peter's last little prank on Bucky. 

Peter is still hanging over Bucky's shoulder, clinging to him with his hands efficiently sticking against the man's clothes. The latter can feel the teen shaking from laughter and shakes his head at the teen's antics with a little grin. "I'll get you off. Just wait, Parker," threatens the man playfully as he gives the body on his shoulder another experimental tuck. As expected, Peter wouldn't budge an inch, shaking his head at Bucky's words. Bucky rolls his eyes, having caught a glance at the large grin plastered over the teen's face. The kid was enjoying this way too much.

"Steve, get your frosty butt up. I need a little help here."

As soon as the words leave his lips, Bucky can feel the body on his shoulder stiffen. The man quickly fastens his grip on the teen. And he did so not too late because just a moment later, the struggle began. Bucky laughs. "What? Now, you don't want to stick close?"

He smirks as he hears Peter groan at his bad joke, the movement halting for a moment before it picks up again. Peter is pushing his hands against Bucky's back, trying to lift himself off. His movement grew more erratic, and Bucky raised an eyebrow. One glance at Steve gives Bucky an idea of why Peter's effort to escape is increasing tenfold. Steve frowns at the pair as he runs a hand through his short golden hair, wiping ice water and snow off. The blond had managed to climb out of the snow but gave off a comedic picture. Captain America covered from top to bottom in white, an unamused expression on his face. 

"Do you want to go first, or should I?" asks Bucky Steve, his grin widening as he feels the kid's fingers curl into his jacket, holding on for dear life and probably fearing Steve's revenge. Knowing Steve, the latter would, despite getting kicked into the snow and laughed at, go soft on the teen but said teenager didn't know about that. Steve playfully scowls at Peter, hands on his hips and giving him the disappointed-Captain-America-PSA-look that the kid had probably seen too often during school. 

"Hand the Spider over, Buck."

To the untrained eye, Steve looks convincingly pissed off, but Bucky could see past the stern facade. Steve is successfully messing with the kid. Said kid is easily fooled and starts pleading, nervousness dripping from every word, and Bucky notes with amusement that the hold on his jacket grows even tighter. The teen wasn't even realizing that clinging to Bucky wouldn't help him in any way. 

"Steve? Come on, that was not that bad, right? You were frozen before. Stuck in a bit of snow is nothing new to you."

Steve wears an incredulous look on his face as he raises an eyebrow at Peter's words. He glances at Bucky, silently asking the man if he misheard or if Peter just added fuel to the fire. Bucky shrugs his shoulders. Peter seemed to realize that his nervous stumbling over words wasn't helping him out of this mess. Bucky has to put some strength into his hold on the teen, throwing Steve an amused grin at the teen wriggling like a worm. 

"Whatever you're thinking of, please don't do it. Steve, I'm serious. Steve, no. Stop right there! Don't come closer!"

Despite his words and the evident panic in his voice, some nervous giggles are slipping between the teen's words. Bucky shakes his head at Steve, the latter wearing a stupidly wide grin as he draws closer, clearly amused by Peter's panicked rambling. 

"Stay away, Steve!" shouts Peter as the blond reaches out for the squirming teen, ready to fling him into the snow. It's a good thing they are at the compound, far from the eye of the public, because the scene unfolding on the Avenger's training grounds would have drawn various headlines in the news. It was quite a sight, the former Winter Soldier holding an unknown teenage boy captive while Captain America tries prying said teen off of his shoulder. 

"You're one sticky punk, aren't you?"

"Language, Bucky."

There is no real bite in Steve's voice, the blond too busy trying to avoid getting hit by a lanky arm that flails around while Peter tries to hold onto Bucky and simultaneously tries to push Steve away. Peter keeps shouting at Steve to leave him alone, threatening to stick to him if he gets too close, all the while laughing. His threats only last for so long before Peter lets out a yelp in surprise. His fingers let go of Bucky's jacket that was now lying on his lap, and he stared at it for a few moments, a puzzled look on his face. Peter slowly lifts his head, sitting on the snow-covered ground, dazed. His eyes fall onto Steve's and Bucky's faces. He swallows as the men smirk while looking down at him. In a blur of motion, Peter throws the jacket at its owner, successfully covering his head with it and earning a colorful curse. He uses the few seconds where Bucky is occupied with taking the jacket out of his face and tries dashing between the two men, choosing the fastest way back to the compound. 

The empathize is on trying. 

Steve stepped forward, grabbing the teen by the waist before Peter could run off. Peter let out a grunt as he was successfully tackled to the ground by a body twice his weight.

"Let's see how much you like playing in the snow."

Steve grins down at the teen pinned under him who, despite his earlier panic, throws back a challenging look at the super soldier. Steve raises an eyebrow, surprised at the smugness on the teen's face. It was typical for Spiderman to act confident, but he hasn't seen that look much in Peter Parker. It suits the kid. 

Steve's eyes widen in surprise as a small hand clamps around his wrists. With one powerful tug, their positions reverse, and the blond finds himself pressed into the ground, one arm pinned above his head. Peter leans over him with a wide grin on his face. Steve notices the teen's free hand has grabbed a good amount of snow, and it doesn't take a genius to guess what the kid was planning to do. The teen opens his mouth, probably to throw some witty remark at him, only to wipe his head to the side so fast it nearly causes Steve to flinch. He catches the widening of Peter's eyes.

"Don't!"

The command hits deaf ears, and before Steve knows what happens, he's not looking at a grinning Peter but at the cloudless sky above. He turns his head towards the noise on his right, and a grin spreads onto his face. Steve watches a ball of limps rolling a few meters with a chuckle. Bucky had successfully tackled Peter off of him, and he and the kid were now fighting for the upper hand. Steve grins at his best friend grumbling about hyperactive teens and Peter trying to shove the man off him, laughing at his complaints. He laughs as Peter lets out a shriek of protest when the older man starts to put snow into the opening of his jacket. 

"Stohohop, it's cold!"

"That's the point, punk."

Peter trashes under Bucky, who had made it to his challenge to shove as much snow as possible under the teen's clothes. Peter tries prying the icy fingers of his skin, laughing but shuddering at the coldness running through his body. Steve walks over, amused by his friend playing around like a kindergartener, watching the spectacle for a few minutes. In the beginning, Peter had been fiercely fighting back, but after some time, Steve noticed the teen growing tired. If it were anyone else, Steve wouldn't have wondered about giving up against the strength of a playful super-solider, but this was Peter. Spiderman doesn't grow tired this easily.

"Peter, are you alright?"

Steve's words cause Bucky to stop wrestling with the kid. He also had noticed the teen's movements become sluggish, but Peter hadn't earnestly told him to stop, and the older man hadn't put much thought into it. Now that he hovers over the teen, not holding him down anymore, he notices the complexion of the kid's face as unusually pale. Brown eyes glance up at them, a sheepish grin on the teen's face, and if Steve didn't know better, he would say the teen looks almost embarrassed.

"Too cold. Can't thermoregulate."

At Peter's words, Bucky turns his head at Steve, raising an eyebrow in silent question, hoping his friend knew what the teen was talking about. Steve wears a frown on his face, telling Bucky without words that his friend feels as much out of depth as he does with the short explanation. Peter must have caught their troubled expression as he tiredly tugged on Bucky's sleeve, gaining his attention.

"It's because of the spider DNA. I cannot regulate my temperature. My body struggles to create body heat like yours does. If it gets too cold-"

"Your body grows weak because it needs a certain temperature to function," finishes Steve Peter's sentence while looking down at the teen, the latter looking out of it but still nods at him with a small smile. Steve shakes his head at the teen, and Bucky doesn't feel like smiling at all, scowl deepening at the sight of a bluish hue on the boy's lips.

"Damn it, Peter, why didn't you say anything sooner?"

Before the teen could justify his lack of explanation, he finds himself bundled up in a jacket three sizes too big, the initials S.R. adorning the front. Not taking any risks of the teen being out in the cold for much longer, Bucky, despite the weak protests from Peter, throws the boy over his shoulder.

"Don't think we are letting you off the hook that easily," mutters the man under his breath as he carries the teen towards the compound. The automatic doors of the entrance already stand open when Bucky walks in. He kicks his running shoes off mid-step and hurries into the joint room. Despite his grumbling, the older man carefully puts Peter down on the couch. He straightens up, looking down on the freezing teen with a frown. Peter is cold, but the lack of shivering was a bit off-putting, giving little clue about what stage of hypothermia they are dealing with. 

The absence of shivering must have to do something with being unable to thermoregulate. Bucky had to ask Banner about that, not trusting the kid to give him all the information. 

"Friday, can you tell us Peter's body temperature?"

"Mr. Parker's body temperature currently lays around 94,64 °F. I recommend taking measurements to get the temperature up. It is beyond his average. A long-term drop in body temperature could cause health concerns, Mr. Rogers." 

"Thank you, Friday."

Steve turns towards Bucky, who controls the urge to roll his eyes at the kicked-puppy stare his friend is wearing. "He'll be fine, Steve. Go search for a blanket and make some tea or something. I'll take care of him."

Steve sends him a small smile. "Thanks, Buck."

Bucky shakes his head when his friend walks out of the room, not liking the guilty-ridden expression painted on the blond's face. Knowing Steve blames himself for not noticing something was up sooner was typical of the man. It made Bucky want to beat some sense into his best friend. He faces Peter again, the latter, at least looking relatively more aware of his surroundings thanks to Friday having raised the room temperature. He watches the teen fumble with the zipper of his jacket, a frown drawn on his youthful face as his fingers wouldn't work how he wanted them to. Peter stares at the metal hand popping up in his vision and pulls down the zipper he struggled skillfully. His jacket gets peeled off of him the next moment before a gruff voice causes him to lift his head. 

"Arms up, punk."

"Hmm?"

Brown eyes throw him a confused look, and although Bucky would have teased the teen for being not quick to take on, he swallows the comment. He had time to make fun of the kid after he got rid of the blue on his lips. 

"You need to put on dry clothes. If you get sick, Stark will throw a fit."

That coaxes a reaction out of the teen. 

"Not keen on Mr. Stark threatening to take your arm off?" asks Peter with a little smirk. 

Oh. Bucky grins. Seems like the teen isn't that out of it after all. He flicks Peter's forehead, earning a glare.

"I'll hear that every day. His threats don't work on me. Now, arms up."

Thankfully, Peter wore snow pants, which are relatively easy to pull off the teen. The thick sweatpants he wore under his outdoor clothes were dry, but Bucky couldn't say the same about the kid's socks and shirt. The gray shirt is soaked, sticking to Peter's skin all around. Thankfully, Steve wasn't here to see this, or Bucky would get an earful again. The soldier watches as Peter tugs at the front of his shirt, grimacing at the feeling of the wet fabric pulling off his skin, only to stick back when he lets it drop. 

Maybe he went a little overboard with the snow. With a sigh, he bends over and gets a hold of the end of the wet shirt. Peter made a noise of protest as Bucky pulled the undesirable article of clothing over his head, leaving him in nothing but his pants, but at least he was left with only dry clothes on his body. Bucky scans the room in search of the blankets he had seen other members of the compound use before the voice in the ceiling spoke to him again. 

"If I am allowed to interfere, Mr. Stark has arranged a range of special clothing for Mr. Parker in cases of a temperature drop."

"So Stark is aware of this problem of yours," says Bucky, glancing at the teen. Peter caught him looking and nodded.

"It wasn't fun when he found out. Mr. Stark caught on mid-February with winter almost over." The kid's expression is solemn as he talks. Bucky almost reaches out to ruffle his hair, amused by the seriousness with which Peter was telling him this as if it had been one of the worst days of his life and not his mentor being rightfully concerned. Instead, he gave a little shake of his head, a corner of his lips tugged upwards while walking over to a closet. He hears some shuffling behind him as he pulls out a set of blankets, almost throwing them at the kid in frustration as he sees the teen has stood up.

"What do you think you are doing?"

Peter sighs as he gets pushed back to sit on the couch with Bucky standing before him, sternly looking down on him. A person shouldn't be able to look as intimidating with an armful of baby blue blankets. 

"I was about to get the shirt Friday told you about."

"You will sit here and wait while I get that shirt. It's in your closet?"

Peter nods while pulling the blanket around his shoulders but not without rolling his eyes, letting out a small yelp as Bucky flicks a finger against his forehead. The teen glares up at him, but Bucky merely raises an eyebrow at him, a silent dare. Bucky gives him one last glance, checking that the teen is bundled up tightly and behaving, not wandering around on his own before he retreats. With Stark's AI speaking to him and giving directions, it is relatively easy to find the clothes despite the chaos in Peter's room.

"This looks pretty tight."

The man eyes the almost plain-looking textile in his hand. Bucky wasn't sure what he had expected, but knowing Stark, he thought whatever this was, it to be more eccentric as he took in the dark gray clothing. Maybe the billionaire held back on his desire for extravagance to accommodate the young vigilante's preference for simplicity. He had noticed that aside from throwing in some colors and graphic shirts, the teen likes to dress easy on the eye.

"It is, but it does a good job. Mr. Stark made several of these. They are great. Maybe you could ask him to make some for you and Steve too?"

Bucky refrains from telling the kid that he and Stark weren't on the level for him to ask the kid's mentor any favors, although the hopeful sparkle in the kid's eyes tells him that Peter thought about that matter differently. Shrugging his shoulders, he skilfully avoids giving him an answer. The man stretches the sleeves to form an opening and holds it out for Peter. 

Peter tilts his head to the side, his eyes wandering up to meet Buckys, giving him a look before settling back onto the clothing held out for him, confusion evident on his face. Feeling merciful, Bucky takes Peter's wrist. "You do have to put this on to work, you know?" teases the man while pulling the teen's hand through the sleeve, noticing with a smirk how a hue of pink spread over the teen's ears. Maybe he should start acting more like this if it's this easy to make the kid sputter around in embarrassment. Oh, he has to tell Sam about this. The kid tugs at his wrist, checks growing red as Bucky tries to pull his other hand through the second sleeve. When he was about to pull the shirt over Peter's head, the teen had enough. He pushes the hands away, sending a frown at the man.

"I can do this on my own!" 

Catching the smirk on Bucky's face, it dawns on the teen that the ex-assassin was doing this on purpose. Peter quickly realizes that protesting wouldn't work on the man. Bucky had the mission to embarrass him, but Peter wouldn't let that happen. He was Spiderman, for crying out loud. Peter was perfectly capable of dressing alone. Getting cold slowed the process down, he had to admit. But still, Peter's sixteen years old. 

He knows how to wear a shirt. Not planning to play along with Bucky, the now slightly frustrated teen leaned back into the couch and slid down to avoid the hands pulling further on the long sleeve. He uses the new-won distance to roll to the right, trying to make a run for it.

"Get back here, punk," scolds Bucky, but the playful twinkle in his eyes betrays the stern tone of his voice. 

"I won't let you mess with me."

It would have sounded more convincing if Peter wasn't kneeling at the end of the couch, both arms stuck into the shirt but glaring instead of pulling it over his head, wearily observing what the man a few feet away from him was planning to do. Bucky crosses his arms over his chest, amused.

"Doesn't look like you do a good job."

Peter squints at the words.

"If I pull this over my head, are you leaving me alone?"

Humoring the kid, Bucky acts thoughtful before grinning a shit-eating grin that Peter has seen too often. 

"Why should I do that? I've got to make sure you are wearing it correctly. I cannot trust you to keep yourself warm."

The teen deflates at the words, almost sounding petulant now.

"I would have told you and Steve! Sooner or later..."

When the man raises a single eyebrow, the teen huffs in frustration. But he is not making a move that shows he agrees to let Bucky help him. The tension hangs thickly over the room as the two hold a stare-off. Both are waiting for the other to make the first move, Bucky watching the teen with rapt eyes while Peter's muscles are bulging under his sweatpants, ready to jump over the couch at any second. Bucky was the first to move. Without looking, his arm shots to the side, grabbing a hold of a stray pillow and throwing it at the teen while rushing forward. Thanks to the room's raised temperature, Peter wasn't as sluggish as before but still nowhere near his usual speed. His spidey sense prevents him from being hit in the head, raising his arms along with the thermo-shirt around his wrists to block the flying pillow. Peter's brows draw together in confusion as his spider sense still acts up, even after keeping the pillow from colliding with his face. 

"Holy-"

The rest of his sentence gets lost in a high-pitched squeak as a metal arm wraps around his middle, tackling him successfully into the couch. Dark strands fall onto Bucky's face, the man grinning down at the teen who glares up from his position under him. It's a little insulting how easily he got him pinned on his back, straddling him by sitting on his tights and throwing him a winning grin that irks Peter just by looking at it.

"Get off," whines the teen and is about to push at Bucky's chest to shove him off, but the older of the two catches the shirt hanging between Peter's wrists and presses it down, forcing Peter's hands away. 

"You're not in the position to make claims, kid."

While forcing the teen into the shirt, Bucky grins, an occasional chuckle leaving his lips at the glares sent his way. By the end of the ordeal, Peter let his head fall back onto the couch in defeat, looking absolutely done with everything. His hair is a tousled mess of brown curls hanging in his eyes, the tips of his ears red again from embarrassment. The teen rolls his eyes at Bucky when the latter asks if he is still feeling cold with a mild dose of sarcasm. The man catches Peter's expression, poking him in the now finally covered stomach. "Don't get sassy, punk," he threatens with a grin promising no good. He is about to poke Peter a second time, for good measure, when his hand gets caught in a firm hold. Peter lifts his head, sending him a glare.

"Don't."

Bucky raises an eyebrow.

"What? You're ticklish?

When the teen doesn't answer immediately, Bucky pokes him again, this time in the side, eyes trained on Peter's face. Peter's jaw is clenching under the pressure of trying to keep his facial expressions under control, but the unmistakable nervousness creeping on his face is almost too easy to detect. Without batting an eye, Bucky frees his hand out of Peter's hold, ignoring the confusion written all over the teen's face as he places his hand over the teen's middle. He just let it hover there, a few inches over the teen's tummy and not moving, never taking his eyes off the teen's face. Peter glances from the hand up to Bucky's face and back to the hand, eyes widening as he sees a single finger twitch. He observes with the morbid curiosity of someone watching a horror movie how the rest of Bucky's hand stays motionless while one finger moves as if independent of the rest of the body. Peter wasn't sure if it was because of the prosthetic, but somehow Bucky managed to wiggle just one finger, then two, and then three, while the rest stayed static. Under other circumstances, he would be fascinated by this observation. In this instance, it merely serves to freak the hell out of Peter. All of the vibranium fingers are moving now in a manner that only indicates one specific outcome of what happens next, and he is not ready for it. 

When the hand starts to descend, he breaks. Before the wiggling finger could close the gap, Peter loses his will to pretend to be tough in front of Bucky. 

"Okay, okay, I admit it. I'm ticklish, alright? You can stop now. You don't have to prove anything!"

Bucky merely raises his eyebrows in amusement at the panicked words stumbling out of the teen's mouth, accompanied by a pair of hands gripping his wrist, hindering his hand from moving further down. 

"After your stunt from earlier, I'm not sure to believe you. Better check this out myself, just to be sure."

"You don't have to do tha-AHAHA! NOAHAHAH BUHUHUCKY!"

"I'm not convinced, Peter. Does this count as ticklish?"

A grin grows on Bucky's face as he watches the teen under him squirming like a worm on a hook. He had not even touched the teen before nervous giggles slipped out Peter. As soon as his fingers actually dug into the flesh of the kid's stomach, Peter's resolve had broken. He didn't try to hold his reaction back, fueling Bucky's curiosity to see what other noises he could coax out of the teen. His stomach has to be a rather good spot by the way Peter threw his head back as Bucky focused his wriggling fingers to dig into the sides of his tummy. Slender hands tried to catch his, but it was too easy to bat them out of the way to get back on skittering his fingertips over the smooth material of Peter's shirt. The shirt clung tightly against his lean body, making it very easy for the metal digits to glide over the middle of Peter's tummy, earning him little jumps whenever he traveled towards his belly button or his lowest rib. 

"Is that a bad spot?" The answer was obvious, but it was too fun to pass the opportunity to watch Peter struggling to answer. Bucky grins as he watches the teen trying to form a coherent sentence between his laughing fit.

"Yes, yes, yes, yehehehes! It's sohoho bahad, it's bahahahad Buhucky!"

"It's that bad?" asks Bucky, acting surprised as he sends ten fingers onto the small patch between the teen's waistline and belly button, feeling the muscle contracting under his fingertips as the teen tries to curl into himself with a shriek but is unable to. His hands get shoved off by flailing arms.

"It's that bad," confirms Peter with a glare, taking the chance to catch his breath while the super soldier had mercy on him.

"That's too bad. I like that spot," muses Bucky as he looks down on the said spot, catching the nervous look Peter throws him out of the corner of his eyes.

"Don't you dare," warns Peter, failing to sound intimidating while grabbing onto Bucky's wrists. 

"Oh, scary," mocks the man before letting himself fall forward. Peter lets out a panicked squeal and throws his hands up to catch the heavy body that's about to collapse on him. Bucky lessens his fall just in time with one arm probed against the back of the couch while using the chance to get a hold of the teen's arms with his free hand, wrestling them over Peter's head and pinning them there. Brown, wide-blown eyes stare up at him before Peter shakes himself out of puzzlement. 

"You tricked me!" 

"I thought you're smarter than that."

"And I thought you don't use dirty tricks."

"Seems like you've got some things to learn, punk. Now, where were we?" Bucky asks with a grin, challenging a Cheshire cat as he wriggles his fingers in Peter's face before focusing on the teen's stomach. 

"No, nohohoo, Bucky pleahesehe, anywhere but there!" begins the teen to plead, tugging at his captured wrists, lifting his head, and trying to see what the man was doing. Bucky grins.

"You want me to try a different spot? Sure."

"NO! Thatahat's not what I mea-AHAHAHAH STOHOP! YOu know thahahat's nhohot whahat I meant! You ahahre suhhuch ahahahan. Suhuch ahahan-NO! DOHOHON'T!"

Peter's legs hammer down on the couch behind Bucky's back. The ex-assassin worries for a short moment if the furniture would withstand the constant abuse of a spider-kid kicking his legs around uselessly. His focus is back on Peter when he hears a high-pitched squeal escape the teen before a wave of hysterical cackling fills the room. Bucky raises an eyebrow at the reaction, concluding that he found the second worst spot on the teen. His right hand hovers between Peter's armpit and highest rips, fingers digging into the place with vigor. 

"I'm almost convinced you told me the truth about being ticklish."

"Almohohohst? Whahahat do yohohu mean almost?"

Bucky stops tickling, eyes trained on the red-faced teen who tries catching his breath, body shaking when occasional after-giggle slips past his lips. 

"Just saying, when I do this," he pinches Peter's hipbones, earning a full-body jump and a cackle, "or this," Bucky claws his free hand between Peter's ribs and let his fingers skim over the space between the bones to send the teen back into a high-pitched giggle fit, "I would say you are ticklish."

"Are you kidding me?" asks Peter. He wears a bewildered expression. "I've told you from the beginning, I'm ticklish!"

"You could have been lying," retorts Bucky. 

"Are you seriously not believing me anymore because of earlier?" asks Peter. The man had another teasing remark already sitting on the tip of his tongue but halted as he caught something akin to hurt playing on the teen's face. Bucky feels thrown off. He knew he should do something, but looking at Peter's face and seeing the wounded expression, he caught himself out of depth for a second time that day. That's why he needs Steve. Steve is better at this kind of stuff. 

Peter is still looking at him, but as the man above him doesn't answer, the younger man's expression turns hard. Bucky's eyes widen as he gets shoved off, unable to withstand the power behind the thin arms that were now easily pulled out of his grasp. It seems that the spider-kid had his full powers back in play. Watching the kid silently collect his belongings, Bucky blinks slowly before getting a hold of himself. As Peter was about to walk out, he called after him.

"Peter, please wait!"

Whatever the teen heard in his voice, it had to be convincing enough for him to stop in his tracks and turn around to send him a questioning look, daring him to give a good explanation. 

"Can we sit down and talk about this?"

Bucky nods at the couch. There is a spark of hesitancy flickering on Peter's features, and the teen is about to open his mouth to answer when Steve walks into the room. Steve glances at his friend standing behind the couch. Something must have happened for Bucky, who looked troubled with his eyebrows pinched into a frown, and Peter, the latter holding his wet-dripping clothes in his arms, wearing an expression far from the cheerful smile Steve is used to seeing on his face. 

"I made you some tea, Peter. Would you like to sit down with us?"

Steve watches Peter throw a glance at Bucky, the latter having not moved from his position behind the couch before letting out a small sigh that Steve wasn't sure he was supposed to hear.

"Okay," mumbled Peter, sounding defeated, but walks back to the couch, leaving his wet clothes on the floor next to the couch table. 

Steve throws Bucky a questioning glance before putting the tray on the table and handing Peter a cup of tea. 

"I also found these," Steve said and pulled a bundle of fuzzy Captain America-themed socks out of his pants pocket, letting them drop on Peter's lap.

"Nice try, Steve, but I won't wear these around the tower. I like the lab privileges."

"Could have worked," says Steve and slaps his knee in faux disappointment to lighten up the mood. Peter's lip twitches at the reaction before he takes a small sip of his tea. "It's good. Thank you, Steve."

"I'm happy to hear that, Peter."

While Peter takes another gulp of his softly steaming mud, Steve subtly nods towards Peter, telling Bucky to fix whatever he has done. Bucky rolls his eyes but gingerly sets his cup of tea down and leans his forearms on his knees before addressing the teen sitting between them.

"Peter, I want to apologize. I was worried about you earlier, but I wouldn't stop believing you because of what happened, even if I were still upset about it. I meant to tease you a little, but I overdid it. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings or make you believe I don't trust your words. I'm sorry." 

Bucky glances at Peter, who sits still, looking at the cup in his hands with a thoughtful look. "I guess I should have told you about this earlier," began the teen, cutting both soldiers off when they opened their mouths to protest. "I trust you to have my back. It's not like I believe you would use that information against me. We are a team, after all," Bucky watches Peter's thumb absentmindedly running along the edge of his cup, halting as the teen continues. "I guess I was too embarrassed to tell you."

"Embarrassed?" asks Steve, head tilted to the side in confusion. Peter nods before directing his eyes at him, a shy smile tugging on his lips.

"Isn't it kinda silly? I've got all these powers through the spider bite altering my DNA, but when it gets too cold, I become fatigued. Meanwhile, you are this strong, and the cold doesn't bother you two.

 

I know you can't compare the changes of the serum with my enhancements, but sometimes I think about it and, you know, feel kinda useless." 

Steve hums, fingers drumming against his leg as he thinks about Peter's words. Before he comes to voice his thoughts, a voice on his right beats him to it. Bucky's eyes are trained on the young vigilante sitting between them. 

"You will never be able to beat that flaw of your powers, but stressing about it will get you nowhere." Steve frowns at the harsh words, but when he glances at Peter, he finds him paying close attention to every one of Bucky's words. The latter puts his hand over Peter's knees, hovering there before putting it down, giving it a short squeeze. "Knowing your flaws is one of your biggest strengths. Just keep that in mind." 

Peter sends the man a soft smile. 

"Thanks, Bucky."

Bucky glances at him from the side, the corner of his lip tugged upwards. 

"Don't mention it, punk."

[sailorstarr-chan4]

Anime Titles Summarized (Poorly) - Part 2

Black Butler: Patent-made for Edge-lord Emo Kids of the late 2000s. But like. It's actually GOOD. Full Moon wo Sagashite: If angels worked at Make-a-Wish My Roommate is a Cat: The best way to convert cat-haters is to make them watch this show Kaichou wa Maid-Sama!: Girls sells her body to make do, but not for sex. Technically. Toradora!: Two dorks with major daddy issues play matchmaker with each other, and accidentally fall in love instead Lovely Comlex: This anime intricately understands the universal appeal of the Height Difference in a ship Romeo x Juliet: Shakespeare.... but with dragon steeds and a magic tree Rosario + Vampire: A straight cis man's idea of a "monsterfucker" show. And allllll of the pantie shots. Sekirei: Battle Royale, but with scantily clad ladies The Devil is a Part-Timer!: Satan works at McDonald's. That's it. That's the show. ef a tale of memories: Angsty teenagers need SERIOUS FUCKING THERAPY H2O Footprints in the Sand: Hate begets hate Anohana: Childhood trauma comes back to life The Pet Girl of Sakurasou: Neurodivergent teen shenanigans explore the existential crisis of Talent vs Genius Please Teacher!: Aliens + statutory rape loopholes FairyCube: Mind-fuck. Pretty fairies. More mind-fuckery. IN ONLY THREE MANGA VOLUMES. Chobits: What if sex dolls had feelings? XXXHolic: God is always drunk and her overworked, underpaid intern is perpetually Stressed Out™ and pissed off at his future boyfriend Kobato: A kindergarten school is being threatened by the local mafia to be shut down. Oh and there are talking stuffed animals, implied to be banished demons and angels. Shinobi Lie: Doctor Who meets ninjas FAKE: Two detectives making out in a alley because they're not gay-- wait, what?! Dance in the Vampire Bund: Interesting story, gorgeous animation..... deeply uncomfortable lolicon Seraph of the End: You came here for cool action against vampires, and stayed for The Gay Angel Beats!: Purgatory is high school Assassination Classroom: Exactly what it says on the tin Brothers Conflict: Why is there a fucking talking squirrel?! Charlotte: X-Men, if Magneto's fears are realized Code Geass: Fucked-up family dynamics meets the metaphysical plane Neon Genesis Evangelion: The Original Love It or Hate It anime Yashahime: *cracks knuckles* Time to destroy a fandom

Part 1 Here!

[obriengf]

Hi! Is it possible to ask for a plethora of #12 for Mitch Rapp? I’m an absolute slut for that man and I want more character building besides him being moody, aggressive, trust issues, etc. I know he’s soft as hell. Please and thank you!

send me a number and dylan character so we can fangirl

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

in a previous ask i briefly mentioned that mitch would be such a dork - so i agree, he definitely has the capability to be soft soft soft. in the american assassin film, we see him at the beginning being such a hopeless romantic with heart eyes for days. and even at the end when he's smiling at the photo... swoooon.

just imagine that you were his partner, or he was your mentor; he would be tough on you, not taking any shit, pushing you to your limits... but then his eyes would soften and lips curling upward so slightly into a ghost of a smile, just barely there unless you're really looking, and he'd be so taken by your little frustrations but dedication to get things done. the little jokes you'd make to get him to smile in the first place, and the way that you so openly show how much you care for him. it'd ignite such warmth in his chest and a feeling that he hadn't felt in years.

don't get me started on if you had gotten hurt, or taken, or anything bad happening to you. the cliches would be pouring in...... he'd burn down the damn world to keep you safe. and when he finally had you in his arms again, your eyes peering up at him in such a doe-like fashion, he would MELT. the epitome of soft. he'd be so gentle, caressing your cheek with his shaky thumb, holding you delicately. you're delicate porcelain and god forbid if he'd ever see a crack in your perfect demeanour again.

[ozzy-boy]

Hear me out, Volks, Scale and Cole meeting their S/O parents. (Kind of want to see those socially awkward dorks in this situation)

Volks:

-Arguably the best one to introduce to your parents out of this bunch. At least he has a normal job.

-He is. So awkward.

-Volks isn't good with people in general, much less around people he has to make a good impression on.

-He's going to be very quiet. Volks will only really talk if spoken to directly. If you strike up a conversation with your parents, he's likely to just sit back and listen rather than participate.

-If he's asked any questions, he'll probably only respond with very short answers.

-Volks grows close to people very slowly. There's a good chance that he'll get along with your parents just fine with time, he'll just be very awkward at first.

Scale:

-It would be more merciful to shoot him in the head at this point.

-He is beside himself with nerves.

-He's an assassin for crying out loud!! What is he supposed to talk to your parents about?? What if they hate him? WHAT IF THEY FORBID YOU FROM SEEING HIM AGAIN?????

-Scale is absolutely worrying about nothing- but cut him some slack! He's never had to do this kind of thing before!

-He won't really feel better until it's over, but he does appreciate it when you introduce him and sing his praises to your parents. Hyping him up a little before the actual meeting doesn't hurt either.

-If your folks have no issues with him being an assassin then basically all worry melts away. Well, in that case! He'll share a few interesting work stories and talk a little bit about what his training is like.

Cole:

-Oh, he's on his best behavior.

-His chronic foot-in-mouth syndrome is no better, however.

-He talks a lot throughout the meeting. Cole definitely dominates the conversation. Chances are he's done... "background checks" in order to be prepared for whatever topics might come up.

-Cole will go off on a tangent, realize he's been talking for a super long time, then quickly try to deviate back.

-Tries to act super nonchalant and casual but he's definitely nervous.

-So nervous that he'll get dangerously close to revealing something he shouldn't. Then he'll backtrack and overcompensate.

-"Haha the wine is good does anyone want more wine??? Haha..."

[lillikoifish]

Ive hit rock bottom guys I am so deep in it now 😔 my 2 week gamer bender of playing TES IV: Oblivion has finally reached its climax. You know which character I am pining for every day? Wishing I could marry? Wishing marriage was a mechanic in my vanilla xbox one game pass version of this game?

Lucien Lachance, the sexy assassin? Nope. Martin Septim, the Sean Bean voiced complex and kind savior? Nope. Janus Hassildor, the vampire count of skingrad who yells at you and we all love being yelled at by sexy authority? NOPE!

ITS THIS FUCKING DORK MAGE.

ALL HE DOES IS READ BOOKS AND GIVE ME GIFTS AND ENCOURAGE ME NICELY AND I WANT HIM SO BAD I WANT HIM SO DAMN BAAAAAAD.

GET ME OUT OF HERE I NEED HELP HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!

[inkedroplets]

what if. what if.

💘 for quakecorp

OK This grew unruly and will probably connect up with the MCU fic I'm working on so I'll only post a snippet. Fake dating for the best Luthor and this dork:

Some things never change…

While it was maybe the furthest thing from funny, Lena still couldn’t help but find it amusing that even on an Earth so much different than her own, without the inescapable baggage of her name weighing her down, she was once again having to deal with another attempt on her life.

From the way Skye was watching the door like a hawk, reclining back in her chair as much as it would allow her to, Lena knew she must be waiting for someone. The self-satisfied smile that spread across her face instantly like a cat that had gulped down a particularly tasty canary made it abundantly clear that it was Lena she was waiting for. 

“Hello, Dear.”

“Sweetheart,” Lena replied without missing a beat, sitting down on her left. 

Jemma watched this exchange nervously, gaze flickering from Daisy to Lena and back again a number of times before finally settling on Coulson. “I really think we tabled the safehouse idea too quickly.” 

“We tabled it quickly because Lena refused,” May said. 

“Refused to entertain something so patently ridiculous,” Fitz said, repeating back what Lena said verbatim..

“If I went into hiding every time there was a threat on my life-”  

“I think an exception can be made this once,” Jemma reasoned. She looked around the table, hoping to rally support but only managed a halfhearted nod from Fitz on her second pass around which looked to upset her more than if he had simply avoided her gaze entirely. “She jabbed a finger at one of the screens that had Lena's would-be assassin’s dossier displayed. “His name is Bullseye for heaven's sake!” 

“I would like to avoid breathing the same air as someone with such a stupid name,” Lena said fairly. “But I’d also like this matter settled as soon as possible.” “To be fair, Poindexter isn’t that much better than Bullseye,” Daisy said fairly. 

Jemma gaped at the both of them. “I wouldn't classify a price on your head as trivial as a mere matter.” 

“I still can't believe you had other people trying to kill you back on your earth,” Fitz said, sounding genuinely mystified at the concept which Lena decided to take as a compliment. 

“The last one,” Lena said, taking a moment to think, “poisoned me.” 

“Tried to poison, you mean,” Fitz said.

“No, I don't,” Lena said darkly as the face of Morgan Edge floated to the surface of her mind. She wondered vaguely how close she had actually come to dying that time around. If not for Kara… She was struck by just how long ago that felt. A lifetime. Several lifetimes. 

“Poisoned?!?”

“I’ll be fine, Jemma,” Lena assured her. “Not the first time someone’s wanted me dead. Not the last either.” She tried to ballpark the number of times there had been a credible threat on her life and figured it had to be well over a hundred by now, although she knew better than to tell Jemma that. “She will be fine,” Coulson said reassuringly. “We had Stark move his expo indoors so that Mr. Poindexter will need to get in close if he wants to get to Lena.” “How big of a fit did Stark end up throwing when you told him?” May asked, looking amused. 

“Not big at all. I promised I'd owe him a favor once everything is said and done,” Coulson said, clearly used to it being the other way around.

“My condolences,” May replied. 

“There will be agents in place disguised as guests. They’ve all been instructed to keep their distance until we can locate Mr. Poindexter.. We'll be watching every way into the building so we’ll know when he arrives. When he does, we’ll apprehend them. If all goes according to plan-” 

“Which is always the case,” Skye murmured under her breath.

“-Skye and Lena won't even lay eyes on him.” 

“And if they do?” Jemma asked, sounding more curious than worried, maybe hoping that Coulson had an ace up his sleeve. “Then they follow the plan to the letter.” Coulson explained, which didn’t seem to alleviate Jemma’s concerns in the slightest. “Lena, Skye?”he said, turning towards the both of them. “Yes?” “To. The. Letter. I don’t like putting either of you in the crosshairs but you insisted on doing it this way,” he said looking at Lena. “And we need someone close on the off-chance that they get close enough to engage.” “I still think May would be better suited for that, don’t you think?” Fitz asked. 

Coulson shook his head. “May’s a known entity. If he suspects something is off he might run and that would mean Lena looking over her shoulder until we could apprehend him. Skye’s been photographed together with Lena in the past a few times. Not such a stretch to think they could be dating.” “I don’t know,” Skye said, looking sideways at Lena. “I’ve lived with Lena a while now and considering the dates I’ve seen Lena bring home, I really don’t think I’m her type.”

“How many dates are you bringing home?” Jemma asked before she quickly began shaking her head. “Never mind. Pretend I didn’t ask.” “That means not engaging with Mr. Poindexter,” Coulson continued, as if he hadn’t been interrupted, unless you’re forced to. Just get to Stark’s safe room. We’ll do the rest.” 

Skye giggled. “All alone in a safe room together. How romantic.” “I’ll try my best to control myself,” Lena said, rolling her eyes. 

God, Stark, does everything you do have to be so loud? 

As if Skye could read her mind she leaned close to her and said: “You know better than me. Are these events always so loud?” 

“No,” Lena said baldly as the canned overly rehearsed voice of Tony Stark blared out over the loudspeakers informing guests that he would make his appearance at nine on the dot. She glared up at the nearest one as if that alone might shame it into turning itself off. “This is…” The word asinine was what first came to mind but she held that back as a kindness. “Unorthodox,” she finished as she steered Skye back towards the center of the room.

They were supposed to keep as far away from the entrances as possible and Jemma had already chided them over their comms for (in her words) gadding about when they should be keeping their eyes peeled for the gun-for-hire.

“They’re normally quite dull,” Lena admitted. “Schmoozing and glad-handing while you try and make sure your smile doesn’t look too painted on gets old fast. Especially doing it in heels.”

Skye made a face. “Sounds like a bore,” she admitted before snatching a crab puff off the tray of a passing waiter.

“They could be,” Lena said fairly. “But that was a small price to pay for all the good it accomplished. And if these antics,” she said as another pre-recorded message from Tony began to blare overhead, “are what people have come to expect from a Tony Stark hosted gala  then I can't get too annoyed. Not too annoyed, anyway.”

“You miss it,” Skye marveled. “All this hoity-toity stuff. Rich girl,” she teased affectionately through a mouthful of crab puff. 

“I don't miss it exactly,” Lena said, although even to her own ears it sounded untrue. “But I was good at it and throwing a gala was devoid of the moral pitfalls that my other attempts at being a force for good were rife with.” “Vanity?” Skye asked, pointing at one of Tony's older suits on prominent display where a small crowd had gathered around as if it was an art exhibit. 

“If only,” Lena said drolly. “But that's hardly an appropriate topic for a date.” She pretended to try and get a better look at Tony’s old armor on display while she eyed the entrance, spotting one of the SHIELD agents milling about in the crowd. 

“Was there a list of approved conversation topics in that doorstop that Jemma prepared?” Skye asked. “I only made it through the first few pages. Goodbye insomnia…” “It’s called being thorough, Skye,” Jemma insisted, her voice filtering in smoothly through their comms. “Which is an exercise in futility if you don’t actually read the material.” 

“I read the whole thing,” Lena said kindly but a moment later caught Skye’s eye and shook her head, vowing to read it in its entirety later on. “Well,” Skye said, sneaking a peek at the time, “what’s the plan when the gala’s almost over and he still hasn’t shown himself?” “We find him without you two marching around like ducks at a shooting gallery.” “I don’t know if it would feel like a proper gala if somebody didn’t try to kill me.” “That’s not funny, Lena.” “It’s a little funny,” Skye whispered. “Lena!” “Not funny,” Coulson agreed, his voice joining Jemma’s in her ear. “We have eyes on Poindexter near the front entrance.”

“Just eyes?” Daisy asked. “No one’s going to move on him?”

“Too many bystanders,” May explained. “If he doesn’t spot you, we can pick him up when he tries to slip out.. “Saferoom,” Coulson ordered in his best don’t you dare try to argue voice.“You didn’t set all this up just to get me alone, did you?” Skye teased as they cut their way through the crowd.

“You got me,” Lena said, completely deadpan. “When we get inside I’m going to pretend to yawn and put my arm around your shoulder as well.”

“Classic,” Skye said approvingly as they began to walk a little faster. They slipped past a couple of guests who looked as if they had made very liberal use of the open bar, talking over one another as they held onto each other for balance, when a tiny wooden skewer whizzed past Lena’s head missing her by millimeters.

“Was that a fucking toothpick?” Skye asked as they dashed around a corner. As if in response to this, a fusillade of wooden skewers shattered against the wall where Lena had been just moments ago before turning the corner.

“You might want to send your date home early, Miss Luthor.” The voice was wholly unfamiliar but the man to whom it belonged to was not. Benjamin Poindexter strode towards them, not hurrying. He moved past the two inebriated men who were still engrossed in their overly loud conversation, not even noticing him. In fact, no one besides the SHIELD agents peppered throughout the crowd had noticed that there was a killer in their midst. Not so surprising considering his unconventional choice of weapon.

“Not such a bad idea,” Lena agreed, resisting the urge to peek around the corner to see how close he was to them, knowing that was likely to get her killed. “Chalk it up to a lack of chemistry.”

“Like hell,” Skye said dismissively as she pulled an I.C.E.R. from her concealed thigh holster. “I’m having a marvelous time.”

“That doesn’t sound like running,,” Coulson admonished. “Why aren’t you two running?”“Well, I’m not the one who insisted on wearing heels,” Skye replied.

[meli-meliai]

I still find it hilarious that the two characters who canonically like and drink tea are Scale and Fuyu. COMPLETE opposites except for the murder charges and their lack of experience with romantic relationships. One is a young, sarcastic, highly-skilled assassin who SHOULD be in college instead of screwing around with ninjas, the other is a haughty, cold, centuries-old supernatural being with immense power and a death count in at LEAST the hundreds. They’re both total dorks. I want to stick both of them into a tearoom and pop back in an hour later to watch them yell over whether matcha counts as a tea blend. Someone’s coming out dead. I love this dynamic sm oml

[thevindicativevordan]

Anything to say on Aquaman ? Especially nowadays after the clumsy Kaldh'ur push killed the franchise and left Arthur without a series ?

Highest grossing DC movie ever and DC managed to completely kill the franchise.

Hasn't had a book in years, and we don't know when if ever he'll get another one. No DCU Aquaman rumors, his animated miniseries got removed from MAX presumably for a tax write-off, and there's seemingly nothing in the works for him any time soon. Not since the GL movie bombed at the box office have I seen a franchise fall off as suddenly as Aquaman has. He should be an easy character to sell, a warrior-king married to a waterbending assassin-queen, with 71% of the Earth to cover all by himself. Arthur is an extremely flexible character who is suited to a wide range of stories. He can be a wild Conan esque hero, the barbarian hero imposing some measure of order on the seabed wilderness. He can be a regal figure, King Arthur ruling over underwater Camelot and protecting the realm from threats. He can be the star of murky Game of Thrones politicking regarding the throne of Atlantis. He can be about family drama, his mother ditching him, his dad frequently dead, his half-brother often serving as his enemy, his wife having tried to kill him and her side of the family continuing attempts to assassinate him.

Yet DC has seemingly given up on him for now. Not so Harley Quinn whose comic sales appear to be just as awful and whom starred in several high profile flops across multiple mediums recently. People bitch about the New 52 but that era was a Golden Age for Aquaman. For the record, every moron on social media who whines about Johns tackling all the stupid memes surrounding Aquaman head-first as being the wrong approach, only outs themselves as a midwit.

NOOOOOOOO YOU CAN'T DO THIS IT'S INSECURE!!! - Dorks on social media who have no clue how to make characters popular.

Sales proved Johns had the right approach. Aquaman became cool after the Johns run. Various other writers from Peter David to Kurt Busiek had attempted to rehabilitate Aquaman and their efforts failed for a variety of reasons, but my personal opinion is they failed because they tried to pretend Aquaman's bad reputation didn't exist. They weren't willing to address the criticisms head on, instead opting to bury their heads in the sand, or have Arthur beat up more popular characters to increase his own standing. Aquaman in the New 52 worked because Johns had Arthur all but look directly at the readers and say "shut the hell up, forget all the dumbass memes for a second, and watch this." Shockingly, it worked!

Chalk it up to prime Johns' ability to make any C-Lister appealing to readers, or that a bunch of new readers jumped on with the New 52, but Aquaman ran for 52 consecutive issues. Not feeling optimistic about any Aquaman book repeating that feat anytime soon. Feel free to rate Jeff Parker’s follow up run as superior in terms of storytelling, I think it’s fantastic myself, and it does make Atlanna an interesting character rather than the cliche dead parent, but we never would have gotten Parker’s run without Johns. He built the fanbase to support the book. Wan's first movie owes a great deal to Johns, the same spirit of swashbuckling fun that made the movie connect is present within his run, and anyone who attempts to claim he deserves no credit isn't worth listening to.

Like it or not, there was a misguided attempt to de-emphasize Arthur as the lead character as part of the disastrous push for legacies during Infinite Frontier. Young Justice Kaldur was my second favorite character after Superboy, yet I don't feel the same affection for Earth 0 Kaldur. He was barely Arthur's sidekick before they tried to make him Aquaman, and the attempt to reform Black Manta was a terrible creative direction. Tempting as it might be to lay all the blame on Kaldur, I don't think it's only his fault. We got a BL Aquaman book by Ram V where Arthur plays side protagonist to a bunch of OCs, with the expected result of said book flopping. Aquaman is not a franchise strong enough where you can sideline the titular character or use him to prop up other characters, a fact that the Black Panther franchise has also struggled to accept post Chadwick's death.

DC needs to get their collective head out of their ass and give Arthur another push. No sharing the mantle, no fighting over the Throne of Atlantis for the 50th time, let's try something else. If they don't have faith in a mainline Aquaman title, at least put out an Absolute Aquaman book. This is no way to treat the guy who gave you the highest-grossing DC film ever.