#bc there was such a push to publish all different kinds of stories

[luobingmeis]

lrb i think something very. interesting. that has cropped up from the push for “good pure moral media” is that it has simultaneously brought the “push for representation” movement—something that is good and should be promoted bc all different types of people should be represented in media, not just the white/cis/het/able-bodied—to this idea that media should at all times be Representative. like maybe it’s just a slight difference but i think a lot abt that post that occasionally goes around that’s like “if ur writing just to check of a series of boxes in representation, ur gonna end up with very flat characters.” like, yes, A Lot of the conversation abt representation also began with a lot of media falling into the trope that the only Black/queer/disabled character was also the villain, which then in turn causes negative associations while also feeding into stereotypes one way or another, so i won’t discredit that. but Now it’s like. how much media upholds itself on “finally being pure representation.” finally showing “good people.” like yes at all times u should be cognizant of Who ur representing and in What way (who is the villain, who is the antagonist, who is being upheld as the good heroic one, etc), but sometimes it just feels like. “everyone in this media has to be good and pure to prove it’s not like degenerative ~other~ media” (op’s note: heavy sarcasm there) or it feels like “if we don’t represent everyone here in a way that is relatable to every viewer and if they are not all good and pure then we will be torn apart.” which then feeds into the concept of “relatability” which, again, i feel like used to be about how like. you can relate to a character even if they are not like you (which tbh i believe that you shouldn’t have to relate to a character at all to enjoy and understand a story but i digress bc the main point and this one are not mutually exclusive), and now has become a bit. hm. like things are upheld as universally relatable Because of how good and pure it is? and that it Should be relatable and if it isn’t that’s Your problem.” or the even more fun “why are you consuming this media if you don’t relate to it/the characters aren’t like you” because apparently fiction is made solely so you can relate to it and not because it’s art that can be, yes, related to, but also appreciated and understood without needing to point at it and be like “that guy is like me.”

which is all to say i think more people need to read more books where the characters you love do stuff that makes you say “hey that’s fucked up.” and then you realize you still love the character and it does not change your Real Person Morals because you have come to the realization that the books you are reading as an adult are meant to entertain and are not the same as the books you read when you were five years old (you know, the ones that were meant to teach you that lying is bad and hitting people is wrong).

which is all to say (part two) that we should also not go completely opposite end of the spectrum bc that is how we cycle back to “””coincidentally””” making the only minority character the villain and perpetuating stereotypes left and right. so maybe there’s a nice middle ground.

[layspotatochipabs]

For ask game... Can I ask for bing bong 2 and bing bong 7

1. bing bong 2

bing bong 2 is a Halbarry fic that's been in my drafts for the longest time (2022). It's got over 100k words but I haven't published any of it yet bc I'm trying to get to a certain point in my outline before I start pushing it out. The gist of the story is basically secret identity porn lol where Halbarry don't know each other's identities.

Here's two snippets from different chapters

Still, that didn’t mean Hal wasn’t curious. He knew the former had blond hair; the speedster’s eyebrows peeked through his cowl. And the blue eyes: kind of like Barry’s. But he noticed Flash’s iris’ were more vibrant while Barry’s were more muted.

It’d be funny if Barry was The Flash.

GL had another stint in space—almost three weeks this time. Coincidently, Hal had also disappeared around that time for and for the same length as GL.

The patterns were starting to come together. Barry had suspicions about GL for a while, but maybe that was because he was also a superhero with a secret identity. Maybe…he was projecting his experience onto the other hero, assuming Lantern was like him. If Barry had an identity, GL must’ve had one, too, right?

3. bing bong 7

bing bong 7 is 2024 Halbarry week stuff. I have vague ideas for all the days I just need to sit down and write them all out.

So far I've finished Day 1; here's a snippet

“Barry is a detective. And the smartest person I know.”

“Technically, I’m a Forensic.”

“Not helping your case, Bar,” Hal snorted, shaking his head playfully. “You’re the best in the business. I wouldn’t have asked anyone else.”

“That’s just because you can’t stand Batman.”

[boxwinebaddie]

Wait so did Ike knoww about Stan and Kyle dating? Also I'd love to hear abt Kyle and Ikes sibling relationship thats so adorable

soooooo long story short:

...y-yes. yes, he Does know.

hOWEVER, IKE DOES NOT KNOW RAVEN IS STAN THOUGH, THAT IS SENSITIVE INFO THAT IKE CAN BE TRUSTED WITH, OFC, BUT IT WOULD PUT HIM IN DANGER AND KY WANTS TO KEEP HIM SAFE.

but long story Long...

i'll leave it in the crotch. xx

( edit: so...my bad, baby. i accidentally went on a crazy TANGENT about ike and jerseykyle's relationship bc i love them a lot and their dynamic is very complicated, so if you want that info about how ike found out about ravesey dating...i gotta put it in another ask.

bc this...got Very long.

you don't have to read this. soz. >.> )

oookay!~ so i got REALLY excited about this because rm!jerseykyle and ike's relationship is super duper special to me, in that, as sp fanfic writer girlie who tends to lean away from a more gentle, kindly, introspective kyle and much more heavily into the potential brutal parts and menacing aspects of kyle's personality when i develop my style dynamics with, ofc, jers being the most brutal of all ncu kyles...

...the way that he speaks to ike -- gently, softly, tenderly -- the way that ike disarms him, the way that j.k. unravels around ike, bends for him, it's one of the ONLY instances written into my actual published canon where we see jers be extremely vulnerable. ( not crying, lmao! )

however, i will say, it was not ALWAYS like that!

*rings the cd re-education bell*

LORE TIME!

so, per my rm!take on the south park lore, ike, ofc, was adopted from canada around age five and he...was Perfect. he was this lil gorgeous, perf, lovely thing, no health problems, dark hair, i like to think his eyes are dark brown, closer to black, sweet kid, easy-going...

...and very NOT like kyle.

and, interestingly enough, i think, At First, that sheila and gerald were super obsessed with ike, cooed over him, he was the baby, y'know? which made jerseykyle MAD jealous of ikey and an Anti from day one.

which is also v interesting because rm!ike, really just fkn Worshipped jerseykyle, wanted to be close to him, wanted his approval, craved that brotherly relationship with him, idolized him...and kyle was NOT having it, dawg! like, it took him so long to even let stan in and let his cold, black heart be light and bright enough in some spots to do That, so he pushed ike away, constantly told him to fuck off/get lost

( i do think that ike's vocab being more vulgar/him being precocious comes from wanting to impress kyle/being influenced by him ), also ike was really fkn smart from the jump in a way kyle wasn't like, to me, jerseykyle has worked hard for everything, studied hard, fought hard, and ike was naturally a child prodigy and didn't have to work that hard for anything, all while being gentle and docile and kind.

-- but going back to STAN for a minute...as a direct contrast to how jerseykyle treated ike growing up...gods angel saint ravenstan was always EXTREMELY KIND to ike. stan never had a brother: okay, he had shelley but his relationship with shelley was even more complex than ike and kyle's relationship used to be and the way shelley treated ravenstan was similar to the way jersey was treating ike, so he Deeply Sympathized with that and endeared himself to ike, encouraged him, and the more kyle pushed him away, the closer ike got to stan.

stan and ike i think ALSO had very similar interests in that they both liked louder, heavier music, revolutionary/counter culture stuff, fighting the MAN, sports ( namely hockey ) i think as a gift, actually, that ravenstan gave ike his wayne gretsky hockey yersey and ike STILL has it ( yes, kyle was jealous ), stan encouraged him to be different and carve his own path in life and while kyle, obvi, was the person most effected by stan's untimely passing...it did also do a number on ike who seriously considered stan like a brother to him and was one of the only other people who Never misgendered stan.

SPEAKING OF STAN DY*NG THOUGH: this was when everything sort of...Flipped. because when stan 'died', whatever part of kyle that could love things also died with him along with a lot of his stability.

so on top of all of his health issues, kyle got really, REALLY gnarly ptsd, would fly into blind rages, got randomly triggered by things and see stan everywhere, have really, really sever panic attacks, had to be put on several medications, got into TOOOONS of fights, etc.

and ike...was just sweet, introverted, lovely ike. stayed in his lane, did his work quietly, existed quietly...while kyle was Loud and VOLATILE.

also, to tie in Another ask where someone asked me while sheila didn't take care of ike as well as she could...fair warning, i am a liiiittle defensive abt this topic because it wasn't that she didn't want to take care of ike or meant to neglect him AT ALL, it's just...when you have a a child who has a lot going on mentally and physically, is more of a firestarter, is more aggressive or more outwardly mentally unstable...

...that tends to require more immediate attention ( especially since kyle was sooo unhinged that he was constantly in police stations, juvie, the psych ward ) and sheila's attention more helicopter parent-y in that she wanted to keep kyle safe, whereas geralds attention was more negative, felt kyle was a failure/embarrassment :/// </3 )

so ike, by COMPARISION to jersey, was VERY low maintenance, did not require to be constantly watched to make sure he didn't hurt himself or others, and so, unfortunately while sheila loved him very much ( gerald just wasn't very interested in him as the second kid other than that he not act up/argue w/ him ) he got swept under the rug because of how pliable and pleasant he was personality wise.

so sheila really does Adore ike, she just doesn't worry about him nearly as much and because of how glaring jersey's issues were, she also mistakenly assumes he's mostly fine where...i really do think ike has pretty gnarly depression, tbh. he is stan coded, i mean that. i will say that him acting out is starting to cause a stir in their house.

anyways...i am sorry this is such a MESS but jerseykyle was watched with laser focus and because of this, ike got off scott free most of the time and received almost no attention. like all his accomplishments went unnoticed or were pretty normalized because the standard he set v young being smart/capable, set the bar high. ilysm, ikey. </3

tldr; ike was The Good Child

and jersey was The Bad Child.

but, in being 'good', he got extremely overlooked by his parents.

thiiiiiiis...is where jerseykyle stepped in. so basically his entire life he was staunchly anti-ike, but he warmed up to ike a lot after stan died because they bonded over talking about him a lot/that grief, and also grew up under intense scary jewish matriarch sheila broflovski and the serious shit show that was having gerald as a father...who jersey actually regularly took shit from so ike wouldn't have to, i.g. when ike did something less than perfect or did misbehaved or fucked up, kyle always took the fall for it and was the messed up problem child, so that ike would essentially spared from gerald's mental abuse/wrath.

ike was also kind of the only person j.k. had in the world, so kyle looked after him because...again...ike is very stan coded, kyle is very protective of the lil gentle hearted people and he basically raised ike in the stead of his parents which forced him to be hard on him in a way that sheila and gerald were not hard on ike...which created a lot of dissonance when ike was becoming a teen and kyle was in hs.

so, essentially while when they were little kids, ike followed kyle around, wanted kyle to like him, thought kyle could do no wrong, as he got older and kyle started to nitpick him, actually care about him and start enforcing rules/curfews on him because no one else did, ike developed a rebellious streak and started to not like or listen to kyle because he was like, bro, whatever, you're so boring, it's one party, oh my god, just because you're boring doesn't mean i have to be!!!!

it's mostly just skin deep though, ike is only irritated because jerseykyle is mad overprotective, hard core and did not gentle parent him as an older brother at like, i shit you not fourteen, like i am so sorry but jerseykyle raised ike basically, and inspite of actin like a heartless monster...loves ike very, very much ( even if he can't say it ) and ike also loves kyle very much. jerseykyle is pretty much the only other person besides firkle, tricia, etc. ( i'll get into that in a diff ask ) that truly gave a shit about him and put weight behind his actions.

so jerseykyle is like ike's older brother/dad, rags on him about doing his homework and being an edgelord

( ike has been acting out a lot, one, because he's finally starting to come into his personality more, which, imo, my hc is that ike is p popular but mostly by accident sort of how stan was because he's pretty and very nice, ike is captain of the hockey team, his accent is cute, gets good grades ( he is slacking right now tho bc hes being edgy as hell ), is a lil skater boy gamer boy, IS V INTO TRUE CRIME, JOURNALISM AND ACTIVISM, creating positive change, exposing injustice, enjoys punk rock music, thinks emo boy stuff is neato,

IKE IS THEEEE DAWN SPAWN OF EVER AND I MEAN THAT, he is a raven of crimson dawn FAN BOY, he is obsessed; i mean that...and despite wanting to make waves in that way, like, he really is kind of an antisocial DORK but lots of girls like him, he gets invited to parties, firkle gets invited by proxy even though people think they are a crazy demonic satan worshiping freak of nature...but ike's super bestie, ofc...their relationship is also interesting...BUT YEAH! IKE! <333 )

also per rm canon, jers does miss ikes birthday every year bc going to south park triggers the fuck out of him which he feels very, very badly about, rags on him but is very pro ike doing what he wants to with reason of not acting like a goddamn FOOL and doing his laundry, his emo dirt bag phase is making kyle's eye twitch ooooof, him bleaching his hair and sticking a safety pin through his lip the second ravenstan walks through their front door while ravesey are secretly broken up and jk is extra mad at him; ITS A HOT MESS EXPRESS, Y'ALL!!!!

if you made it this far...i have to put the answer to the FIRST part of your question with all that dialogue in another ask so feel free to re-ask me that, but to reference it a little...ike is so team ravesey like it is actually painful, that is his ROMAN EMPIRE. firkle actually really does not like kyle bc they think he is lame as hell, help, and is anti-ravesey bc they think romance is a distraction,

( okay, spoiler, but firkle is in love with ike, ike does not know this, ike is super fkn oblivious and is actually very bi, so it's not like he's just not aware he is not straight, he just....actually has no idea, rip, he also has a crush on a girl in his class, it DOES make firkle want to actually dome themself to hear about it 25/8, stupid Feelings, smh, firkle b hating jersey and is lowkey a little jersey coded ) anyways they think kyle dating raven of crimson dawn is going to interfere with the band, their music, their sound and is a hater. like boooo! come on, FIRK! :/

BUT IKE IS A ROMANTIC!!! IKE IS THE JR. RAVESEY CAPTAIN!!!!

tldr; kyle and ike have a complicated relationship but love each other very much and ike does eventually learn about ravesey secret dating bc they are the brothers of ever and cannot hide shit from each other BUT I GOTTA PUT IT IN ANOTHER ASK, I AM SO SORRY, BABY, YOU GOTTA ASK ME AGAIN ABOUT THAT! but i hope this thrills you?

-uncle nina, ceo of insane hs isaac moisha broflovski lore

[adhd-merlin]

I love exploring new ships bc it gives me more perspectives on the characters and I get to see how different kinds of love change them as a person. So.

all this to say do you have any good starter recs for merwenthur 🙏✨

Hey :) I've only been in the fandom a few months and I mean it when I say I haven't read much Merlin fanfic (I've spent way more time here on tumblr than on AO3).

But since you asked me, personally my recommendation for a starter Merwenthur fic would be Choose and Choose and Choose by fleete.

I think it's the fic that got me actually interested in this ship in the first place, and also probably the only longish Merwenthur fic I've read (though it's only about 11k word).

You might have read it already, because it's the one Merwenthur fic I keep recommending – in which case you can skip the next few paragraphs (sorry). But I'll put another couple of links at the end if you want to check out more stuff.

fleete's fic is about the three of them getting together, and the "triggering event" is Gwen jokingly confessing to Arthur how she kissed Merlin after he almost died from drinking poison that one time. And Arthur has... an interesting reaction to that revelation.

You know when you read a fic and it just makes something click for you? This fic did so for me, and it just happens to tick many of my boxes in terms of tropes, too.

I love the characterisation; the three of them didn't feel too OOC even when they were doing things they never would in canon.

I liked the slight awkwardness around sex of Arthur and Gwen, because they're medieval 20-somethings who only recently lost their virginity to each other, and I found it realistic and also kind of endearing. I liked the tenderness and the vulnerability of it.

I liked the dynamic of the whole triad, but especially between Gwen and Merlin because in this fic it feels like their S1 friendship again and it's clear that they care about each other a lot, and in some Merwenthur I've read their relationship feels a bit like an afterthought at times, coming second to Merlin’s relationship with Arthur, or Arthur’s with Gwen.

I don't know, I guess The Vibe in this story just felt right to me, and I loved it to bits.

A lil excerpt:

Before this, Merlin was a comfortable presence at Arthur’s side. He was like Arthur’s right arm. Or maybe, more precisely, like one of Arthur’s old battle wounds: occasionally annoying, but a familiar part of his body. And now. Merlin seems to have acquired his own body. And a pair of lips. Lips that Gwen kissed. It’s absurd how little time it takes for his mind to spin Gwen’s original, innocent story into something more tawdry. He pictures Gwen sitting in Merlin’s lap, rubbing her thumb under his chin, pushing up until he consents to let his head fall back. Gwen would pull down Merlin’s stupid scarf, admire his Adam’s Apple, feel the beat of his pulse under her fingers, and stroke up and down his throat while Merlin breathed open-mouthed at the ceiling, probably aroused and nervous. Would Merlin be nervous? Arthur thinks so. 

@merlinemrys has also published some Merwenthur fics on AO3, as well as @flight-of-fantasy, who's recently updated their Merwenthur fic. They both might have more to rec.

If you've read or will read fleete's story, I've tried my hand at a sequel, because personally I needed more.

Also!! There's going to be a merwenthur fest soon (!?) so keep your eyes peeled for that 👀

[1800duckhotline]

what is vampire the masquerade and whats killer is dead. i assume videod games but i could be wrong... you seem to be having soo much fun im nosaayy 😁

omg hi mani im so flattered u would ask!! yeah ive been in the throes of videogames lately AHAH... oc brained but videogame about it sort of...

vampire the masquerade is actually a ttrpg originally published in the 80s i think, but it keeps getting updated so its not like. anything super old... whenever i mention "vampire the masquerade: bloodlines" im talking about the 2004 videogame created based off of the ttrpg! im biased in loving vtm and vtmb since well. it's about vampires. but i think it's an unique take on them that like makes the supernatural aspect not too boring compared to the classic supernatural vampire take. since it involves clans, a lot of vampire politics and societal aspects to it all, etc... Bloodlines itself is not a perfect game (ill avoid geeking out too much about the brief dev hell history it had) but i value it so dearly bc its so 2004 and is so gothic/alternative in its genuine influence. also the story is goofy but really good too (with um, simultaneously, the con that It Is a 2004 Game, meaning it has a lot of weird bigotries that were normalized for the time lol). Unforchy it's almost unplayable without downloading an additional patch mod that restores also a lot of cut content ^_^ but you make do... its so easy to make ocs for the game and the general ttrpg, sooo many ways you can go with your characters!! Bloodlines itself as a game is an action/adventure RPG mostly focused on combat (with stuff like stealth sessions) as well as various ways to resolve different quests. the variety of said outcomes is mostly limited by the fact the studio wasn't able to polish the game at all for release due to activision, the publisher, pushing troika games (dev team) to release the game early to compete with half life 2 at the time (yeah crazy i know). that said, the dialogues can be really charming and fun and offer a nice variety of things to do.. its not perfect but seriously is the best vampire RPG game around so far..

killer is dead is completely different (mostly because i can never focus on one thing for too long lmfao), it's an hack and slash 2014 game created by suda51 and grasshopper manufacture (same game devs behind no more heroes, lollipop chainsaw, shadows of the damned etc) and it's. an okay game. i dont even know if i can explain the story bc its like, a clusterfuck. and usually clusterfuck stories are goichi suda's specialty but this one goes over the moon (funny joke if You Know). it's a pretty mid game. I love it on one hand bc its easy to play and very stylish, tho the shaders sometimes can give you an headache. I also love the protagonist (mondo zappa) because to me thats a butch not just some guy. Unfortunately the game has the very strong cons of being too short for the kind of game it is, and also has an infamously bizarre minigame that's called "gigolo missions"... you basically go on "dates" with beauties (sexy girls basically), you give them gifts until they 'love' you and then you go have sex and they give you weapon upgrades as a result. the date though consists of you building up your "guts meter" by looking at their boobs or legs so it's like. REALLY STRANGE. CANT HASHTAG IM SORRY FEMINISM OUT OF THIS ONE I'M AFRAID.... it's so conflicting bc apparently suda didn't want to add this function but publishers forced him to. oh well. a solid 6.5/10 tbh. idk if i'd reccomend it tho maybe gameplays are better than getting it at full price imo (i got my game as a gift)

UM SO SORRY FOR GEEKING OUT...I HOPE THE EXPLANATION WAS CLEAR. My brain keeps jumping from media to media with no pause... i wanna focus on ocs again but this keeps happening hahaha

[ahiddenpath]

For the fanfiction ask game: 17, 18, 25, 49, 51!

Citrus! Thank you so much for the asks! If anyone is looking for Digimon Adventure and 02 fanfics, you can read mine on FFN or on AO3 if you are logged in <3

17.) Do you have a writing routine?

A few years ago, I was big on finding a place with a closed door and lighting a candle (partly for vibes, partly to discourage wandering off). But these days, I try to be as informal as possible, so that it's easy to write anytime, anywhere. Sometimes, all you can do is get 15 minutes of copying edits into your draft or jotting down ideas, and those 15 minutes are way better than nothing.

18.) Do you enjoy research? Which fic of yours required the most research?

I enjoyed research a lot more about 10 years ago. Search engines are a nightmare these days! I tried to research courtship in Japan and France in the 1930s for Puits d'Amour, and there is. Nothing. Searchable on Google in English for anywhere except the states and the UK. I ended up purchasing some books on the history of courtship that are, sadly, still very US and UK oriented, and just. Making it clear in my fic that the countries portrayed are fictional, largely in part bc I just could not get my hands on the info I needed.

I did some medical research for Seeking Resonance that was really interesting for me at the time, and oddly, came up in my career just last week! I was floored lol!

25.) What’s your favorite part of the writing process (worldbuilding, brainstorming/outlining, writing, editing, etc)?

I seem to be comparatively light on the worldbuilding and outlining. I love writing because flow state feels amazing and I love editing because it's challenging play. Often, I find that what I want to say evolves from the moods and ideas that occur during flow state. It's been interesting, because over the 12 years of publishing as ahiddenpath, I can see reflections of what I was dealing with personally at the time, and how I resolved that strain with the story. Of course, this kind of writing demands more editing later, as it's so freeform. But I enjoy editing, and I believe my love of writing and need to write are strongly connected to the fact that I use writing to deal with things, to understand myself, to challenge myself, and to grow.

49.) What fic of yours would you say is the best introduction to you as a writer?

How I write and how I think about writing is always changing and evolving, so I suppose my more recent fics? But for the digimon fandom specifically, I usually say After August. Like most of my stories, it's a character-based drama. Specifically, it's about the Adventure Chosen dealing with the loss of their partners and the difficulty of shifting from life as a Chosen in the Digital World to life as kids on earth. Each of them copes in a resoundingly individual way, and they reach out to one another to offer what comfort and support they can.

My works tend to be about people grasping for self-growth and dealing with their demons. They usually aren't plot heavy, although I've been pushing myself to explore plot-based stories recently.

51.) Does what you like to write differ from what you like to read?

One of my closest friends has a master's in literature, and she obligingly wrote me a list of what is... How do you say this? Expertly??? Considered the best literature available in the English language. I've spent the last several years feasting on that, hoping to learn and grow. So, um. My writing can't compete, lol!!!!!

But lately, I've gotten back into reading purely for fun, rather than growth/challenge/experience. I devoured three modern Greek myth retellings in like a three week span, and I have another waiting at the library for me to pick up! Typical, lmao!

The sudden contrast made me notice that, at the risk of sounding snobbish, books written because the narrative is fun, imaginative, and joyful to behold are a different experience than books that encapsulate some aspect of humanity with painful, exquisite, brutal clarity. It's like, hello reader, would you like enjoyment or an existential crisis???? It's been a privilege and a joy to grow from these uh... Literature degree required reading list books. But man it's fun to eat a novel like it's cake!!! OM NOM NOM MORE PLEASE!

I'm not sure if that answered the question at all, but I guess recently I am trying to explore books that I find delightful rather than personally challenging.

Thanks for the asks friend, they were a great distraction from some difficult stuff <3 I really appreciate it! I'm happy to take more if anyone is interested.

[antariies]

20 19 questions for writers

tagged by @i-mybrunettelady!! ty nero :3c

tagging dama my friend dama @sylvaridreams

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

th. three.

2. what fandoms do you write for?

exclusively gw2 these days!

3. what are your top 5 by kudos?

i've only got the three published on ao3, so in order of most to least kudos is: forgive us, visions of the past: the departing, and HOW TO BUILD A CHAIR (THIS COULD BE GLORY) !

4. do you respond to comments?

yeas :•]

5. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hmm! how to come back from the dead

6. what is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

i would say all the gift fics i've written have pretty happy endings!

7. do you get hate on fics?

no. also how is that even a thing still

8. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

no, but i love to talk about ocs fucking creepy and wetstyle on discord with friends. if i were to write dedicated smut i think it would be a series of oneshots from my commander's pov. it's not harley's fault he has so much weird and freaknasty yet incredibly story-relevant sex. pussy that launched a thousand plots.

9. do you write crossovers?

once ☝️ when i was younger and on ff.net i wrote a SYOC pokemon/pjo crossover. it's been abandoned for years. poor thing.

10. have you ever had a fic stolen?

not to my knowledge

11. have you ever co-written a fic before?

yes! we haven't worked on it in a hot minute, but @hawkepockets and i have a fic about harley and prem's historic falling out pre-personal story, featuring our many headcanons about divinity's reach and the events surrounding the great collapse :]

12. what's your all-time favorite ship?

HARLEY/TRAHEARNE/GIL THE OT3 OF ALL TIME !

13. what's one WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

ummm i have a wip called "lessons learned" and it was supposed to be a series of 2nd-person vignettes from the pov of the sylvari commander. expanding more on early personal story and how being raised/mentored by caithe and trahearne kind of fucked them up. whose bright idea was it to let miss "i will walk on my knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting" and mister "i want to martyr myself so bad it makes me look stupid" take a crack at the young and impressionable sapling anyway. now look at them. they're pushing aurene to meet the same unreasonable standards because it's the only way they know how to live. generational trauma fic. you know how it is.

14. what are your writing strengths?

give me a STRUCTURE! give me a set of RULES! if you say "here is a strict format you MUST follow" i will say "YESSIRRRR" and i will think inside of that box so hard and i will do it so good. i don't break rules but by god i'll bend them within an inch of their life. also i'm funny

15. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

more of it now and forever

16. first fandom you wrote for?

pjo high school au

17. favorite fic you've written?

due to recency bias, my fave fic is always the one i worked on last. rn it's my wip "how to make coffee"!

18. what are your writing weaknesses?

the fact that i don't do it. my turnaround time is abysmal there's like a minimum two years waiting period in between everything i publish :[ also according to my boyfriend just now he says sometimes i don't explain things enough. sometimes i expect the audience to know what kind of broth i'm making but i haven't thrown them enough bones. and i don't realize this bc the broth is already cooked in my head. it's obvious to me but not to them.

19. have you ever had a fic translated?

i've had someone ask once if they could translate my fic, but they also wanted to repost it to a different website. so i turned them down. sharing is fine, but i'm just not comfortable with my writing being reposted somewhere else even with credit.

[nightmarevore]

hi! i'm getting into writing safe vore oneshots and i was inspired by a few of your works and reblogs. for years i was really discontent with my writing, but when i revisited some of your stories today, i noticed how similar your writing style is to mine, and the fact that people enjoy your content made me confident enough to complete a draft and plan a new story. i wanted to know if you make drafts and revise them? do you just publish the first draft? do you get help writing or editing them? 1☆

WAAAAAAAAAAAAH I;M SOBBING THIS WAS SUCH A NICE SERIES OF ASKS TO COME TO YOU'RE SO NICE TO MEEEEEEEE omg gomgo gomgomgomgklgkgfkjngfjbjdk i've never been complimented LIKE THIS or asked extensively for my process, this is new to me!!! you're wonderful and kind and i appreciate you.

i'm gonna have to make a readmore here as to not clutter up everyone's dashes to tell you my process/thoughts so HERE WE GO!!!!

i actually have only one fic i get edited and it's a non-vore fic, a very close friend of mine edits a fn.a f fanfic i'm writing based on w/illi.am a/f.to/n. i don't ask them to edit my vore stuff, but they do know i'm into vore. i actually write all my fics in a google doc!

i'll typically actually write as i go entirely. i have a rough idea of how i want the fic to go (who's in what, who does what, an event i need to happen, etc) and write along that rough guideline in my head. i write completely in order, or else i can't make it flow well together. sometimes i'll write what else may need to get done or else i may forget.

i'll consider things i decide to change as i go along "the first draft," since i went with something entirely different. for example, in one of my drafts for a wip fic, i chose to have luke, in the serial killer, panic and size-shift to half size and have the fic end with a half-size hurt/comfort vore from luke and rowan. instead, i changed it so luke is dazed but has time remain his current size and pull rowan out of his pred instincts taking over and have cuddles afterwards and vore when they got home, luke still the same size.

though adhd and autism get in the way at times—executive dysfunction is a bitch. a lot of things i have written, like a luke and rowan serial killer fic, as well a a fugue state william fic have been a WIP since February of this year—literally when i BROKE MY FOOT and was stuck in a reclining chair for a month. i keep telling myself i need to get to them, but then i see ffxiv and hanging out with friends and just decide that's a better way to spend my time at the moment. i've been in a huuuuge brain fog for a few months bc of this, the recent one shot i posted was actually made because i was speaking vore feelings i had with medli.

i definitely have an easier time writing when i'm specifically fixated on vore, luke and rowan, william, mike, etc.

i'll write when i'm hyperfixated, and my brain pushes me to write more when i'm at work rather than at home, because adhd classifies work as something i need a distraction from, and home as chill time. i'll write on my breaks or when i have a moment to myself to sit and hide.

i'll tell you right now, i get SOOO many ideas and have at least 10+ wips, including f./n/a,f, luke and rowan, and ffxiv characters.

when i write, i'm mostly writing from my heart. exactly what i'd expect to think, feel, and hear. i put myself into the perspective/mind of the characters i'm writing and can get deep into these fics as i write them. i get so interpersonally connected to my writing as i'm writing that i physically feel my character's emotions, and see them in my head exactly how they play out.

honestly, i'm not too sure about tips on how to get out of making yourself write when you don't feel like it. i've gotten frustrated with myself for staring at my documents for too long and not being able to write anything. i imagine the scenario in perfect detail, and then i'll sit down, stare at my work, and i'm like ....???????????????????

i'm actually trying to open up to my therapist about getting medicated so i can have an easier time writing/creating for you guys! hopefully soon.

i hope this kind of gives you some insight to my process, please go forth and create and never be afraid to share. <333

this ask means a lot to me!

[menalez]

thank you for pointing out (in the "regret is not rape" ugh post) that it is possible to regret genuinely consensual activity. I get what the other person is trying to say but I have had a lot of sex I regretted (fully consensual, often initiated by me) and obvi the line "regret is not rape" is misogynistic and victim blaming but suggesting the only reason a woman would regret sex is thay she didn't consent enthusiastically goes too far in the other direction. consensual sex is a human activity and it's possible to regret it just like any other human activity. that doesn't mean that women who have been raped just "regretted" the sex; those are obviously two different categories and rape apologists are just trying to obfuscate things. I just don't think it is a good response to "regret is not rape" to be like "well if it was consensual then why would the woman regret it? clearly the regret is an indicator that consent was lacking" because that just joins in the obfuscation.

anyway. sorry that you have to deal with all this shit. clearly a few someone's just hate you personally and completely lack human decency. so what if you are bi and lying? (I don't think you are to be clear) harassing you isn't helping lesbians anywhere and is just deliberate, targeted hatred. literally who gaf if someone is wrong about their sexuality on the internet. and what kind of loser cares that much about something an internet stranger did however many years ago that abusive relationship was.

feel free not to publish, I don't want to stir any more bs up for you. just wanted to say you had a good point and people are cray cray. I hope things improve for you

i do get where she is coming from & she’s right in that sometimes the “regret” is an outcome of having been coerced or pushed into sex acts u didn’t want to partake in. or being drunk n doing sth u wouldn’t actually do which is also rape in certain cases. my disagreement was mostly bc she said it’s rape 99% of the time which, i do think a lot of cases of “regret” were bc it was literal rape but idk how to quantify that. idk which phenomena is more common. but i know for example many ppl might’ve wanted to wait to have sex but a moment of passion got in the way of those plans & therefore they might regret. or feeling regret bc it’s sex out of marriage which can harm the woman’s reputation. or bc u realise the person u had sex with is a horrible person. or the sex was awful n not worth it. or u realised u don’t like casual sex and wish u hadn’t done it. there’s many scenarios that might involve feelings of regret but not rape.

the problem is the saying “regret is not rape” is very often based on misconstruing rape victims as just women that can’t make up their minds and had totally consensual sex then claimed it was rape later bc they’re just soooo crazy and want to get a poor innocent man in trouble. the reality is we know that simply regretting something does not make it rape. as u said, they say this bc they want to obfuscate things.

also literally… idk who they think they’re helping when they act like this. frankly it’s obvious they’re simply pretending it’s somehow for the sake of lesbians that they’re doing this as a way to justify their behaviour. i cant imagine someone actually being helped by these ppl harassing a traumatised woman about her trauma lmao. best case scenario for them is that their assumptions and stories are all true & i’m lying about everything. their worst case scenario is that i’m actually telling my truth and they’re actively harassing me about it and intentionally triggering me repeatedly for years while calling a rape victim they don’t even know a liar about her trauma. none of them seem to care about the very likely latter possibility.

[hklnvgl]

(tagged by the lovely @ailec-12 ✨)

I posted 1,471 times in 2022

48 posts created (3%)

1,423 posts reblogged (97%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@flitwickslittlebrotha

@charactershoesfic

@werewolffeelings

@bloody-wonder

@grrrrrr-argh

I tagged 884 of my posts in 2022

Only 40% of my posts had no tags

#trc - 243 posts

#tdt - 206 posts

#mdzs - 111 posts

#pynch - 79 posts

#d - 54 posts

#aftg - 32 posts

#greywaren spoilers - 32 posts

#fic - 17 posts

#greywaren - 15 posts

#ask - 13 posts

Longest Tag: 138 characters

#i also want to check the country of others by leïla slamani out from my library so whenever i do that i'm pushing it to the top of my list

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Rules: List the first lines of the last ten (10) stories you published. Look to see any patterns you notice yourself, and see if anyone else notices any. Then tag some friends.

i was tagged by both @flitwickslittlebrotha and @kelliealtogether thanks!!! 💕

the real hawk: Ronan knocked, and then knocked again with more force.

est quaedam flere voluptas: On some hidden level, Adam wanted to be the kind of person to effortlessly enjoy parties.

Yiling’s apples: There were plenty of homeless people in Yiling.

overflowing: Sirius regretted many things.

little dolls for sale: It wasn’t the first time Ronan had thought about it.

enormous are the groves: Adam poured himself out of his car, barely pausing to close the door after him.

into silence: It was Blue, Gansey and Henry’s fourth going-away party.

the plum tree flower: Adam inhaled deeply when he got the door open.

arm as a pillow: Declan didn’t technically live with Jordan.

stars parting: The nightmare wasn’t special.

all in all i'm pretty happy with these first lines! so much that some of them doubled as summaries 🙃 i'm not sure who's been tagged already so i'm just gonna tag @of-stars-and-moon @ailec-12 @parakeatswrites and you guys can ignore me if you've done it already 💛

10 notes - Posted February 21, 2022

#4

ages ago (i'm super late sorry 🙃) @andrea-lyn tagged me to do this! 💛 (thank you lovely!!)

Rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (or so) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought to the world in 2021. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

when the world is one color (pynch, 2k). so this is the first of the many one shots i managed to write and post last year and i'm very happy with how it turned out! aka how to combat being cold with hugs (missing scene, post-trk, pre-epilogue)

but for their voices (pynch, 5k). this was very exciting to write bc it was fun to explore adam's thought process in this cdth-inspired au. aka adam is not unkowable if you stare at him long enough (different meeting au, college)

a persimmon (pynch, 1k). oh dear i struggled so hard to finish this little piece bc there were many different things i wanted to include, but i'm quite happy with the result! aka adam panics bc he's horny (missing scene during ch. 39 of trk)

the puppeteer (pynch, 3k). i made myself cry while writing this one. aka once upon a dream (sickfic, mi-adjacent)

yiling’s apples (mdzs, 2k). i've fallen hard for their story so i had to write something for it. aka why does everything important happen in yiling (pov outsider, gen)

tagging @ailec-12 @of-stars-and-moon @cheeeryos @behindtheatlantic @parrished @catboyadamparrish @flightspathfic @kelliealtogether @parakeatswrites 💛💛

12 notes - Posted January 11, 2022

#3

back in march (😅😅) the lovely @ailec-12 tagged me in this game! i'm super late but 🤷‍♀️

rules: tag 9 people you would like to know/catch up with

Last Song: can't remember as usual 🙃

Last TV Show: twenty-five twenty-one (yes it's destroyed me thanks! 🥺)

Currently Watching: crash landing on you (it's a rewatch!)

Currently Reading: you are not like other mothers by angelika schrobsdorff and i'm listening to beloved by toni morrison's audiobook

tagging @ive-garden @creativefiend19 @kelliealtogether @of-stars-and-moon @parrished @sleepy-skittles @purgatorybfs @catboynecromancy @cheeeryos 💛

12 notes - Posted August 3, 2022

#2

Describe yourself with ONLY pictures you have! You cannot download or search new pictures.

i was tagged by @parakeatswrites @kelliealtogether and @behindtheatlantic 💕💕💕

See the full post

13 notes - Posted August 22, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

writing prompts 💖

it's been a hot minute since i last opened prompts and i don't really have lots of time in my hands to write but i think having little things to serve as inspiration is exactly what i need to get back to my usual writing rythm! so. please send me a pairing and a prompt and i'll write a little one-shot 💕 (i'm mainly in the mood for writing pynch and wangxian but if you wished to see any other pairing just send it my way and i'll see if i can write something for it!)

thanks @ailec-12 for helping me compile this lovely list of prompts! 💛

50 Angsty Questions Prompt List

more questions

dialogue ideas

kiss prompts

more kisses

100 dialogue prompts

bad things happen bingo

minifics

anon asks are of course welcome as well! 🥰 thank you!

14 notes - Posted August 23, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[yisanged]

so i started orv on a whim and im really really liking it so far!! i decided to start with the webtoon adaptation, is it good in your opinion or do you think i should read the web novel instead? i mostly started with the webtoon bc i was on webtoon n it was. There. but as the resident orv expert i thought i would ask your thoughts :)

omg ORV. HIIIII blows up but then puts self together again and twirls hair RESIDENT ORV EXPERT.... ME??? i'm honored........ i don't know if i deserve the role though because uh. tb completely h i haven't read the webtoon. like i read the prologue and that's it i haven't gotten any further than that..... this is my greatest shame i'm not fit to be considered an orvtual. that being said idk if i'm the best person to ask for thoughts about novel vs manhwa? i'll do my best to lay out what i do know for you though since you went to the effort of asking me!! if any of my orvtuals that are actually knowledgeable about both want to chime in feel free. sorry if this gets lengthy even if i'm not a super loyal fan i definitely get the normals over orv

so first thing to consider about orv as a whole in any form is that it's longggggg. the novel is composed of a prologue + 99 episodes + an epilogue, but those episodes and the epilogue were further split into smaller chunks during serialization so it's 551 chapters total. korean webtoons are usually split up in a similar way, larger story arcs split into small pieces for scheduled publishing, which is convenient for comparing them. based on a cursory look at the webnovel page, the latest chapter was number 135 and it's the very first part of episode 25. in the novel, chapter 135 is actually part 5 of episode 26, so you can see a slight discrepancy, but it's really not that bad. that timing is something, although it brings up a more pressing point to consider, which is that the novel is finished and the manhwa is like. not even a quarter of the way there. a webcomic chapter weekly is probably more digestible than a 551 chapter 1.3 million word webnovel, but you'll probably catch up before it reaches the end and then you'll either just have to wait it out for the end which would probably take a really long time or just start the novel while in the middle of the manhwa or something.

how accurate the manhwa adaptation is to the novel is what i can't really say since i haven't actually read the manhwa. i've heard that there's some notable changes, and although i don't know all of them or have seen how they've played out first hand they mostly sound pretty reasonable based on what i've heard of them. some of it is just like translation stuff, some of it is to avoid weird political things? this happens a lot whenever japan and korea comes up in each others media......... uh yeah it can get kind of messy there so sometimes skirting around it is probably just the safer option. anyways, to reiterate, i really can't speak much about this since i haven't read the manhwa, but i haven't heard anything about it being like drastically different and people generally seem to say really good things about the adaptation.

for my own personal thoughts. well orv is a frame tale. a story within a story. the webnovel within orv that kdj read is like the centerpiece of the whole story. if i was gonna be some sort of a purist about it, i'd tell you the original novel is the best way to experience orv. in all honesty though, it doesn't matter that much. like i vehemently believe if you're going to get really into orv you should read the novel at some point, but like again. 551 chapters. i get that a manhwa is way more palatable than that. even for other webnovels w adaptations like this, a lot of the time i'll read some of the adaptation to see if it interests me before getting into the novel. it's only because i'm sort of biased towards orv cause it's. well. orv. that i'd really push to read the novel, not even first if the thought of all those chapters and words are daunting to you. i'd much rather people get invested in the story through the manhwa than be turned off it as a whole just cause it's so long. if you're planning on just casually enjoying the story, than yeah, the webtoon is perfect for that. though if you could be convinced to go deeper. hey. take my hand. we can viewpoint this omniscient reader..... together.

okay. anyways. recap my main points in case i wasn't clear. 1) based on what i've heard just through word of mouth, the adaptation's been staying pretty true to the original and is doing a good job of telling the story 2) the novel is finished and the manhwa is, speaking bluntly, not even close 3) PERSONALLY. personally. if you're willing to put in the work to read orv and can appreciate it's 1.3 million word swag then i'd recommend you go ahead and start with the novel. BUT if the thought of all those chapters makes you nervous or makes the story sound any less appealing to you at all then definitely go with the webtoon while it's still fresh and relatively short. the most important part of orv is the way the story waves itself, and you should be able to see that pretty well either way.

so yeah that's what i have to say. i hope i could be somewhat helpful despite the fact that i'm a shameful fake fan and haven't actually read the manhwa ^^; and I HOPE THAT YOU LIKE IT no matter which one you decide to go with :]

[haloburns]

⭐

Here's a star for the director's commentary thingy :3 Excited to see what you pick to talk about

aww thank you!!

IM GONNA TALK ABOUT GHOST LIGHT

(for those of u new here, ghost light is my danny phantom oc ship, consisting of danny and mateo. mateo is my pfp)

so i started this angsty au series of my own series, right?? it started with a half-assed christmas fic that i speed wrote christmas eve and then abandoned. then like.... a little over a year later, i get this idea for an au and realize it's THEE perfect prequel to this christmas fic. so i start dabbling with it in between other projects and i fully intend to finish it before i post it because it's not THAT big a deal, and very few people actually follow me for my oc content ANYWAY but in march of this year i was like "okay. that's it. i need validation!!!" so i posted the first two chapters

then i decided i was burnt out from writing danny phantom stuff due to lack of engagement and jumped over to legend of zelda (pack server my beloved) and have spent the last few months recovering over there. except every time i plan on working on my next update for one of my fics over there, i end up with this fic again. EVERY. TIME.

"this isn't what i really want" is based on the idea that things would've played out differently if danny and mateo hadn't been roommates to begin with. the idea that "what if danny and mateo weren't roommates? what if danny was already ghost king? what if mateo never found out that danny was phantom?" drove the idea, but unfortunately, those two are like barbies i smush together magnets that can't be drawn away, and i realized that them having a "we're just friends :)" kind of relationship while fuckin nasty and pretending no one can tell was EXACTLY the vibe i wanted. this is one of those frustrating fics because everything would be solved IF THEY JUST TALKED TO EACH OTHER but their own fears keep them from being honest

which is why i like the title so much bc the context changes as the fic goes on and i am a slut for that shit

MORE DETAILS UNDER THE READ MORE BC THIS GOT LONG LMAO

it was only supposed to be a few chapters long, MAYBE 20k, and now i'm looking at 8 chapters, roughly 45k. AND I HAVE ACTUALLY PLANNED THE ENDING AND HAVE IT ALMOST COMPLETELY FINISHED!!!

but my favorite part about writing this fic has just been like... playing around with narrative stuff. the first chapter happens over the course of like. ten minutes. and it's so super gay and yearning and poetic. then the second chapter like. zooms through the night until danny and mateo are in an alcove all but fucking. then we jump to chapter three and get a deeper insight into these variations' minds and i reveal the level of dumbassery to be expected from this fic lmao i've also had a lot of fun pulling pieces from other fics i've written/published to tie together and change their context! they're fun little nods to my other works and has been such a fun exercise in "okay. so they do x because of y... but what if i change y to z, what would they do then???"

and then chapter four!! i actually have a completely different version that i originally intended to use, but as i got to the end of chapter 3, i realized, they would not fucking do that. so i recontextualized what i'd written and it turned into a whole different beast, once again showcasing the boys' whole fucking dumbassery on display for literally EVERYONE EXCEPT THEMSELVES TO SEE i just really loved them playing in the morning while continuing to delude themselves that This Meant Nothing to either of them

chapter five was actually not supposed to be entirely from luke's pov but it turned out to work best for pushing the story through more time quickly, and to also see the boys from an (mostly) outside perspective to showcase just how STUPID they're being. the conversations mirrored each other almost exactly but in ways unique to each of them that was so much fun to play with. luke and danny's relationship is much more antagonistic sibling-coded than luke and mateo's. luke is definitely filling the older sibling role for both of them, but in danny's case, he already has a meddling older sister, so his and luke's relationship follows that same pattern. luke is fine with that, he has that relationship with some of his sisters in both directions (he's the middle and only boy). but with mateo, he's the oldest, so he revels in the soft guiding older sibling advice luke gives him, and it's SO OBVIOUS in this chapter. danny and luke shouting and throwing things at each other whereas luke and mateo having a softer conversation, although both of them culminate in the same advice: just talk to him. then ofc we finish with jamie and luke talkin about his tendency to meddle and we get to see a silent peek at danny and mateo's relationship when others aren't watching which is just... so precious to me

now my plans for the last three chapters...... rubs hands together with an evil grin

so i never intended this fic to be as in depth as the main series, so chapter six jumps to the end of the year. end of the year celebration that ends in a "last night on earth" kind of deal with danny and mateo, and it's fuckin RAUNCHY but i'm really proud of it. dunno how it ends yet (maybe that's what my writer's block is... maybe if i figure out where i'm going, then i'll be able to finish it) it's... mostly just lots of gay pining while being rawed lmao

but then i realized nothing interesting happens in sophomore and junior years that would be worth mentioning, bc there's not ghost shenanigans that anyone else is involved with, so i decided to just.... skip forward lmao and i did it in THEE funniest style imaginable: a glee recap. it's literally titled "here's what you missed last time on..." and then there's an actual glee style recap where vanessa runs through the big events and we get some glee-recap quotes and end on an open ending.

then i proceed to cram the events of one year into a single chapter. the plan is danny and mateo get caught goin at it during a party, but they don't remember being visible. so mateo's confused when everyone is congratulating him on finally getting together with danny and he panics. and ends the relationship. this is like...late october?? so he and danny avoid each other until break. then break happens, they come back and mateo meets tony.

so, those of you who've read the main series will know the name Tony. he is a bitch. he hurts danny (emotionally) but he's not really a bad guy. he's just kind of a dick. he serves as an emotional flashpoint for ghost light in the original fic, and he does here as well, but this time it's slightly more passive?? and gentle?? i actually LIKE him this time lmao

the fic ends in an unsatisfying way, and that's on purpose. danny and mateo make amends for one final night, the night before graduation, but after that... they don't say anything and continue on like they have been. so they move away and drift apart and don't see each other again... until the christmas fic, which is hallmark levels of ridiculousness lmao

AND I'M SO CLOSE TO FINISHING THIS FIC!! i'm done with chapter 7, and chapters 6 & 8 are in their final acts. i'm gonna post them all at once and then turn my attention to finishing the hallmark fic!! i just... really love this story. i love getting to play with the characters and motivations and their ties to each other, how different things might've been if things had happened just a little differently, even if it is with my own work. there are like. seven people who give a shit about mateo and the stories i'm telling with him, and they keep me going with these fics!! writing in a fandom that actually gives praise and feedback makes it easier to work on my mateo stories, and whether the pack knows it or not, they're the reason i'm able to even CONSIDER finishing this story and i'm so grateful for that

BUT I'LL BE DONE NOW BC THIS IS ALREADY SO FUCKING LONG LMAO

thank you for giving me the opportunity to scream about this fic bc so far, only my sister has heard me yell about it and i figure she's due for a break LMAO

[catoptro-pho-bia]

i do see plenty of people complaining at tryst six venom (p. douglas) being homophobic and fetishizing lesbians, that the women seem "written by a man" and how it is an overall disgusting book, and after reading and analysing it a couple times (because i did enjoy it for... various reasons) i want to have my take on it:

• from what i know, penelope is popular for her bullying romance/s, which (exception tsv) are pretty much heterosexual. i don't say it is a healthy manner to approach romance, i say it is a pattern of her writing that didn't show up when she published a wlw book

• regarding homophobia (because Clay used slurs), i want to ask a question before my argument: how do you see homophobic people act? or talk about queer people? Clay, as a characther, for 70% percent of the book, she's fighting with self homophobia, which i am sorry is this a new word for you? how many queer people fight with this on a daily basis? there are plenty issues with the book, if i like it doesn't mean i can't approach the actual issues, but homophobia because there are slurs in the book? CLAY IS HOMOPHOBIC? RAISED IN A HOMOPHOBIC SOCIETY? how do you expect her to think/talk? don't get me started with the enviroment that allowed/pushed her to grow this way in her teenagehood. they were pretty much explained if you actually TAKE YOUR TIME and read through the lines :D

• another thing is fetishising wlw which i do have some words to add. in olivia's pov, the way she process some events/ interactions, tell the story how she feels being fetishised, realising people can take advantage of your sexuality, besides the bullying, and how pretty much it reflects the real world. you think it's disgusting? it happens daily to queer people. is it toxic for a straight (i dont think she is too straight based on how she wrote some scenes but lets not assume peoples sexuality😭) woman to write about it? yes, IF the character would be made to normalise it. liv didn't. 60% of her development is based on her fighting it, being tired of it, running from it, teasing with it, etc. all the stages, call it what you want. it happens daily. it happens irl.

• the "women that seem written by men" argument pissed me off the most, because in media, from which i've seen, often the lesbian couples are made from one girly/femme girl and the other is kinda masculine/butch or stem which feeds more into the stereotype of "who is the man in relationship?" and that a wlw couple has to contain one feminine and one masculine side. i don't have any issues with these couples. but the fact that both were pretty feminine as style and personality, doesn't mean they were made for the male gaze/ by a male gaze. femmes can fall for other femmes too, you know.

• i think penelope showed through clay how it is to battle inner homophobia (especially as a queer person) and the fear of rejection from the loved ones, and how this can turn into hate and make you do disgusting things. make it make sense how it's homophobic 😭😭😭

there are, as well, lots of problematic parts: from the marker scene (that made me give an instant -1 without discussion, unnecessary scene), from liv accepting a bit TOO MUCH in the name of love -but it's a common thing in these kind of books-, livs brothers that piSSED ME OFF they are annoying, to the almost r*pe scene, i mean i got the idea of it but she could send the message a bit more.. differently, aaaand etc.

are liv and clay one my confort characthers? yes. is the book problematic to some extent? yes. is the book homophobic/fetishising wlw? i'm sorry but it doesn't make sense to me HOW.

you don't like a book, that's cool, but from that to shitting on an author (which i somehow get bc she isn't my favourite as well but you do you) for the opposite she tried to show in a book? :)))) cmon

[writingamongther0ses]

Under the Moonlight

Summary: Melody’s lost her husband three years ago. She just found out she’s lost her sister.

She’s not going to lose her niece.

Notes: Written for @flashfictionfridayofficial’s prompt Under the Moonlight as part of a fun horror/werewolf romance story I’m writing for fun bc my brain refuses to let me work on any of the WIPs I’m planning to publish. I did a picrew of Melody if you want to know what this woman looks like.

-_-

The moon was bright and full.

Snow gleamed under the moonlight. A overturned truck and several bodies were lit as well. The scene of chaos was silent and eerie. Almost beautiful despite the blood.

The rumble of an engine broke the silence.

The snowmobile rumbled up to the scene, screeching to a stop before turning off. A woman hopped off, pushing up her googles and clicking on a flashlight to get a better look. Her face twisted in displeasure as she looked the scene over. Strangely, there was nothing that could’ve caused the crash. Yes, the road here was a little narrow, but the military-standard truck hadn’t crashed because of that. The front of it was twisted, like it had slammed into something.

Or someone had jumped out in front of it.

She turned away from the front and the lack of hitting thing to poke her head into the back of the truck. “Cecily!” Melody called, even though she knew she would get no response. Her niece was only six months old, so all she could do was cry. Besides, there was no sign of a small bundle anywhere among the bodies, even though Sam had told her that this squad had been the one to take her.

He had also told her to wait, that she was a geneticist and not a soldier, but fuck that.

Melody had lost her husband three years ago when there had been no other choice but to kill what little remained of him. She had just been told that her sister was dead.

There was no way she was losing the last bit of family she had left.

So what had happened?

Melody turned her eyes to the nearest corpse, kneeling down to get a better look. Gripping the front of his bulletproof vest, she tugged it down, revealing deep claw marks. If she had to bet, the rest of the bodies were like that.

Beside the body, there was tracks, not including the imprints her snow boots left. Two different kinds. One was wolf-like and there was several of them. The other was only one, human bare feet with bird-like trails following.

Melody dropped the body and stood, the flashlight following the tracks. When they hit the forest edge, the second disappeared but the first continued onto what looked like a deer trail. So that was the way Cecily’s kidnappers had gone.

In the back of her mind, there was a high, childish, giggle. Are you scared, Mommy?

“No,” she lied out loud. She didn’t have time to be scared.

The snowmobile wouldn’t fit on the trail.

So Melody, ignoring the gleeful You liar, took off on foot.

The setting moon lit her way.

[lassieposting]

Hi i havent read the books post-resurrection so im kinda lost on why you dont like phase 2 val? She was easily one of my favourite characters ever, she was flawed (and the books took time to acknowledge them) and relatable and still really admirable (intelligent, brave, loyal) and i really liked her and really appreciated that she wasn’t perfect unlike every other young adult heroines. What went wrong😢😢😢😢

Okay I'm gonna put this under a cut because I very strongly dislike phase 2 val and I know it bugs people who don't feel the same, so. Dead dove dont eat

Okay so first off, phase 1 val and phase 2 val are completely different people. literally. phase 1 val was based on an ex-friend of lardo's who used to apparently be involved pretty heavily in like, editing the books and "she'd react like this" or "val wouldn't say that", and that val she was one of my favourite fictional characters from when book one came out to the release of resurrection. phase 2 val is based on his whiny little girlfriend who likes to start shit with 14yos on twitter, and you can absolutely tell she is no longer the same person. so the long story short of "what went wrong" is "the original irl val's friendship with dirty laundry ended for whatever reason and he decided to retcon her entire personality to suit his gf"

Phase 2 Val, in my opinion:

Weak, like won't even fight back when she gets jumped bc boo fucking hoo she's so awful, bitch get up already, nobody signed up for ur pity party

Whiny. So fucking whiny. All the time. And she's the POV character so it's inescapable.

"Pacifist" but in a really pathetic virtue-signalling kind of way like "Oh, I've done such terrible thiiiiiiiiiiings I'm so awfulllllllllllll look how good I'm trying to be nowwwwwwww pay attention to meeeeeeee" kind of way, it was both boring and a massive eye roll. It's a book about magic and asskicking. Kick some ass. We're here for escapism not "realistic" whining. Yes, irl she'd be a mess. As an author it's his job to strike a balance between the "realism" he wants to portray and making his readers so depressed and done with his heroine that they quit reading, and in my case, he absolutely failed.

Everything must be about her at all times. Skug is having personal problems? Fuck him, they're about her now. Everything is about how it affects her, and her feelings, and be damned to the person actually having the problem. Fucks phase 2 val cain gives about anyone except herself: 0

Bitter and jaded. Which yeah I get why but it's like jesus christ what do we get out of reading about this? It's not even good bitter and jaded where it makes you empathise or admire her strength in adversity or whatever, she's just become a really nasty person with no redeeming features that I could see. Which? Landy outright said she's based on his gf? If your boyfriend is gonna drag ur entire personality through the dirt like that and write "you" as just a collection of incredibly negative traits...yikes.

Really ungrateful about the awesome life she leads? Which bugs me bc I fucking hate mundanity and knowing that all there is to life is fucking working and bad mental health. I would kill to live her life. All she does is moan about it. Like? Quit then. Fuck off back to being a mortal if it's that bad and live the shitty life you wanted to get away from in the first place. That way we'd get no more books, and quite honestly, thank fuck for that. But anyway, she needs to pick one, stick with it, and stop complaining about whatever she chose.

The girl wallows in self pity. And if someone else isn't indulging her enough, she'll wallow harder and louder and more obviously. Yawn.

Her POV is now so depressing to read that Resurrection literally tanked my mental health. I'm not kidding. I fell off the self-harm wagon, the suicidal thoughts came back, reading her dissociating would make me dissociate, I just did not cope whatsoever. Being in her head was just like being in my head during my worst points, and I hate myself, so naturally, I hate her too. Like I get why some people like phase two val. I get that her depression is "realistic" and that trauma does just make some people completely dislikeable and self-pitying, and if people want to read about that, then...sure. you do you, my dudes. But I live that reality, I am that person whose trauma made her a dysfunctional, isolated bitch, and I hate, passionately, having it infest the media I consume to escape.

Essentially if I wanted to engage with a bitter, spiteful, depressed piece of shit in her 20s who pushes everyone away and sucks at everything, I'd live my gd life. Yall see me tryna engage with my real life? Hell nah I'm on tumblr dot com burying my head up the ass of whatever fandom will force my brain to produce some s e r o t o n i n and that is what I need this series for

Also? The dynamic she had with skug in phase one? "Until the end"? "You save me, I save you, that's how we work"? Forget that, it doesn't exist anymore. I stopped reading after Midnight, because she was written like he was a coworker she could barely tolerate. They went from "Lardo confirms on twitter that they talked on the phone a bunch while she was in america and he'd always ask her to come home" to "she comes home and proceeds to blank him for five months while she sits in her fuckin multimillionaire's mansion feeling sorry for herself". Their friendship completely disintegrated, they were totally separated for most of the book, she's written as not giving a single shit about him. She treated him like dirt, and their dynamic basically felt like it was becoming "Local Man With History Of Gravitating Towards Abusive Women Makes Same Terrible Choices For Fifth Time" and? that was the point of no return to me. he supports her unconditionally, no matter what he's going through at the time, he's walked on broken bones to try and get to her when she was in danger, she can tell him anything and he'd never use it against her. I did not, for one second in phase two, believe she felt the same about him. tbh it felt like she could - and wanted to - drop him at the first opportunity and not even feel bad about it, and that's not the dynamic that made me so emotionally attached to phase one. i signed up for "until the end", not whatever bullshit phase two has going on.

Apparently she's "less depressed" now and their relationship is "better" in the books published since midnight, which! might well be true. but I haven't read them and don't intend to, and she's gone from one of my favourite fictional characters ever (which! was impressive! because i almost never bond with the female lead - i normally get attached exclusively to the character i crush on, which would be skug here. val was the first female lead i actually cared about since xena! so im deeply salty about losing her!) to a character i? honestly prefer to pretend doesn't exist. i live in war era dead men/generals crackship land because that way, i don't have to acknowledge her or the fuckin character assassination phase 2 pulled on her.

so yeah, no hate towards phase one val at all. phase one val was awesome and flawed and gave me something to aspire to despite my shitty mental health and trauma, and if she'd kept her original personality she might still have been those things. but the original "real life" val is no longer involved (and doesn't talk to landy at all anymore, apparently), and the val based on landy's insufferable gf? i cannot get behind her at all ever, four for skug and none for phase two val cain bye

(tldr; you're not missing anything by quitting after spx)

[sauvreng]

This isn't actually an ask, but I would feel uncomfortable sending a message since we didn't have a prior interaction. I just want to say, I was new to the fandom and just read your fanfic, I love it really. I reread it from time to time. Favoring kurokura ship is scary sometimes, some fans hated the ship so much they would attack the shippers. So I'm delighted to find fans like you who openly supports it despite the odds.

hello, thank you for writing. i'm sorry if this answer is late. tumblr notifs are... inconsistent.

the haters can really be rough to deal with. i've had dav and myself called a few nasty things, but i generally don't let it get to me. i like what i like and i don't really care about the opinions of some random nobodies i've never and will never meet or interact with in my life.

i do however, have a few things to say about the purity movement and what it does to creators so hang on for a while as i rant.

people sometimes confuse "interesting and fun to consume" with "this is what i think is healthy and wholesome". you don't eat fast food hoping for a healthy meal; you don't read fics hoping for well-balanced, woke, aware and healthy characters and relationships. the two are completely unrelated. some may have all of this, but it's not really the norm. that said, don't try the salad at mcdonald's, it is absolutely horrid.

i write what i find interesting and fun to write. and let's be real, all h×h characters are very much in the grey zone. that's what i love about it. we have a culture of black and white, good vs evil, light vs dark. thanks a lot, christianity. but life is never like this. people who attack kurokura shippers seem to conveniently forget that kurapica is also a murderer, that killua has probably personally killed more people than kuroro has (unless you count people murdered by the spiders as a whole, then it's probably reversed).

if you think of it, this black and white thinking is way more destructive to the psyche of everyday people, than shipping a pair that would probably have an unhealthy relationship if they were real people. this black and white thinking makes people believe they are Right™ and therefore everyone who don't agree with them are Wrong™. and how can you have a real conversation, how can you grow and learn and empathize with people different from you if this is how you view life?

no one is good. no one is evil. we all do things that sometimes have positive results, sometimes negative, but most of the time, the results are positive *and* negative.

even this purity movement started with very good intentions and had good results. they pushed creators to be more inclusive, more aware of social disparity and so on.

but still.

kurapica is not "good". kuroro is not "evil". they both are more than that, and that is a testament to togashi's writing genius. all his characters are complex and multi-faceted. it is what makes them vibrant and feel real and helps us connect with them. i would *never* advocate that a real life survivor of mass murder would start dating the person who orchestrated the whole thing (though even that is debatable, if you read chapter 0). it would be absolutely unhealthy and twisted.

but. as characters, it is hella fun imagining how this would happen and what each of them could bring to the other, how they could heal together, how hatred can turn into trust... i'll stop here before gushing about this for three pages.

i mean, i've already gone on a long rant nobody asked for, lol. bc i'm tired of this, not just for k/k but...

i've seen fic authors literally bullied into deleting their fics bc one of their characters dared say something out of line that immediately labeled them "abusive". i stopped reading certain fandom fics bc the entire fandom was like this, expecting teenagers who have lived through extreme trauma to always say the right thing, always be kind and patient and supportive to their partner... and they bullied many authors who dared let them lash out once in a while.

or there's amelie wen zhao who had been so looking forward to publish her first book and was bullied so heavily she cancelled the whole thing. bc she dared portray a social issue from a chinese point of view, wanting to describe what was happening in her country, but people took it to mean something completely different, stolen from the african american point of view. she was literally bullied into abandoning her dreams. that's just so upsetting.

so it's not just k/k. i'm tired of this. can we just agree that stories are stories, they have fun, complex characters that makes one want to understand their psyche and put them in uncomfortable situations to see how they might react, that the stories are a safe and healthy way to explore things you probably don't want in real life?

stories have an impact and i understand that. but at the end of the day, they are *stories*.