#because im aro and i say so

[lynnieos]

If you're not looking at your friends with the sappiest dopey ass smile smile on your face with hearts in your eyes then what are you doing/silly

(all in good fun btw!! Show your love to your friends however you want!!)

[redysetdare]

A character looks straight into the camera and says "I'm not interested in romance" and people will still say "No, it's not confirmed they're aromantic!!!" "They could change their mind!!!" "it's a challenge for them to overcome!!!" "They'll have character development that makes them fall in love"

It's like they are given the most blatant answer to a character romantic orientation and they actively ignore it. all the while all it takes is subtext for people to speak as if it is fact for a character to be any other sexuality.

[aroacewolfic]

I hate it when people's first reaction to me saying I'm aroace is "oh but don't you wanna have a partner and kids in the future, won't you be sad without that" Like no bitch I'm gonna be happy living alone in the peace and quiet with my cats and dogs and 1000 books to keep me company and I'm gonna be just as happy and complete as every other person out there if not happier.

[shmaroace]

they hate me for my aro swag

[parchmentknight]

realizing that i am an outlier in fandoms because i do not ship anyone with anyone

[vixenicks]

"aromantic matt murdock" i say into the microphone as the feedback proceeds to echo throughout the empty auditorium and shatter my ear drums

[tsams-confessions]

im not hiding myself, I send an ask a long time ago saying how, as someone who liked to ship, I was doing my best to keep Moon as Ace representation as best as I could (Im demi- who loves silly lovers) I speak to some Ace artist and they had guide me, I been follwing a nice blog too! that often responds to my ask, but I leave this ask now to say.. what Im doing wrong? I keep reading these ask saying "how aphobic people are when removing the sex repulsed out of NewMoon!" when.. all I do is going by how he is acting in canon and what he said- the "I dont swin any way" was to a literal monster showing his ass.. but but , im not here to get yelled at. im here to know, to ask those anons who say me and others artist are being aphobic, to please guide me, what Im doing wrong? maybe is my like to proyect into characters I like? is it because I view im as Ace-Sex favorable? is it because I just like him to be with Solar? I ask those who leave those type of ask, to please tell me, and by extent. others that will read, what is it aphobic to view NewMoon as another "type" (hope is ok to say it like that) if Ace, please because I care to know..

.

[craycraybluejay]

Transphobes get off my blog, transandrophobes especially. In fact go hate queers with the evangelical white moms who have coincidentally the same talking points as you about trans men.

[bitegore]

When i say i want to hang out with weirdos I do not mean "I want to hang with gay people and that's my marker for whether or not someone is weird." I'm not saying "weird" and meaning "vaguely aro" or "polyam" or "nonbinary" or whatever. Those are not personality traits. They tell you nothing about what that person is like. If i say I need more weird people in my social circle I'm talking about people who are weird. People who aren't like, going with the grain of any community based on literally anything. I have standards for this. I'm looking for like. People who won't blink if I say i only ever enter my house through the window or when I talk about drinking gasoline and then do it and they see I'm not joking, or people who won't think anything huge of me cracking the top of an eggshell and drinking the whole thing from the top in one mouthful. Or if they do, they do enough same-vein shit that it doesn't faze them. These are not really the same as being part of a very broad group of people who happen to have an exogender or whatever. I have met some incredibly normal (derogatory) trans people and gay people and aro people and nonbinary people. When i say weird I mean weird.

[oflgtfol]

i think the whole discourse around whether or not cishet aro men are queer stems specifically from the idea of allo aros being hypersexual - and so the idea of an allo aro, specifically a straight aro man, draws to mind the idea of like, fuckboys, or sexist men who only view women as sex objects, etc. And that is likely why the idea of cishet aro men leaves such a bad taste in apparently so many peoples mouths

now, i’ve spoken before about how attraction =/= libido. i’ve mostly spoken about this in the context of being ace, where asexuals can still have a libido despite not experiencing sexual attraction. the confusion and conflation between attraction and behavior has been a huge source of frustration for me with regards to the popular idea of asexuality and how it has confused me on my path to figuring out my own sexual identity over the years

BUT. the idea holds true not only for aces who have high libidos - but also for allosexuals who have low libidos. the idea that to be allo aro is to immediately be some hypersexual fuckboy is just, so warped? just because you experience sexual attraction but not romantic attraction does not mean you immediately become some sexist pig who always needs your dick wet. like idk it’s just beyond fucking frustrating to see the way that people sexualize alloaros when they’re just - they’re just people. you would not assume what another person’s sex life or libido is if they were otherwise alloromantic allosexual, because your orientation describes the way you experience attraction, not your behavior and sex life, nor your libido. in the same way, being alloaro has literally nothing to do with what your actual libido is. so why are allo aros the exception? to try to divide the community and exclude them based on your assumption of their sex lives is just so fucked

[angeloverload]

I don't just want to be loved

I want to be owned

Proudly, loudly

And adored

Take me

Bite me

Hurt me

Just so I know I'm yours

I don't want you to

Lust over my body

I want you to

Live for my words

Keep me

Hold me

Love me

As your only equal in this world

Stay with me

Stand next to me

Overpower me

Because I hold all the power over you

It's a give and take relationship

That is only bad until it's good

No one can take you away from me

Because I would kill them before they could

We can love each other in our own way

It's us against the world

[redysetdare]

I think i just need to express that the culture surrounding QPRs right now made me think that i couldn't have strong bonds with my friends. Society told me i cant have strong bonds with friends because that was only for romantic relationships. Then i went into aro spaces and this idea was reinforced using QPRs instead of romantic relationships. it was "You can still have strong bonds with people without romance! It can just be a QPR instead!" "QPRs are MORE than friendship so you can have STRONGER BONDS than you would with friends."

it made me think that the relationships i wanted with my friends HAD to be something other than friendship for it to be as strong as i wanted. If i wanted to be the first person in someones life i had to enter some sort of committed relationship. if I wanted someone to care about me as strongly as i did them then it would have to be a relationship that was "more" than friendship.

I thought I wanted a QPR because i was told the only way to get that care and security that I wanted was to enter into a relationship that was "more" than friendship. because friends didn't care that much. because friends didn't live together their entire lives. because friends were never the priority relationship wise. and it took me years to realize that i didn't want any partnership and i shouldn't have to be in one to want these things from a friend. these things CAN be something friends can do. but i found that out on my own. because the aro community kept saying "you want a QPR" when i just wanted a friend who finally saw me as a priority in their life.

[dullahandyke]

didnt even touch on the sandra lynn stuff int he tags of the last post bcos if i talk about her im liable to explode. get behind me, middle-aged divorced woman proficient in archery

[frogs-and-books]

I have to admit that it's so frustrating to me that people are doing this "He's canon ace but not canon aro" thing. It feels like people wanting to have it both ways at the cost aro people. If you're going to say only what's explicit in the text matters, then be honest with proper embrace of Death of the Author and disregard what Brennan said outside the context of the text. If you want to invest meaning in authorial intent, than be honest about the authorial intent with Riz. It's hard enough being aro in fandom as it is without people playing both sides of the fence on this

I'm sorry that there is a lack of aromantic representation, but you can't decide what the authorial intent was for the author. He could be aro! There's a lot of subtext and ways to read the story like that, but it's just as easy to read it as him being demiromantic or gray romantic or even just a late bloomer. Because of this, I can't confirm the authors intent unless he states it. I don't personally have an opinion on it, I just like Riz, and I'll like his character no matter what his sexuality is. I'm not going to disregard a statement from a cast member, especially when I doubt Brennan would have said without Murph's permission. That, to me at least, is confirmation of authorial intent.

I can understand why you're frustrated, but there aren't (or at least shouldn't be) sides. I'm simply saying that Riz is not canonically Aromantic, which is true. However, this does not mean that Aromantic people are somehow wrong in saying that they believe he is! Just like many other things, it is up for the viewer to decide currently.

If Murph comes out and says Riz is Aromantic, that's it. He's Aromantic. But until then, it's up for interpretation. You aren't wrong for saying he's Aromantic, but neither is someone saying he's not Aromantic.

I am so glad that Riz resonates with you, but others don't have your same experience and might relate to him in different ways, and their experience and interpretations aren't less valid than yours.

The world isn't black and white. There are so many nuisances that can be beautiful if you allow yourself to see them.

I'm not on the fence. I know exactly where I stand. Riz is canonically asexual and he has no confirmed romantic interests, although he has been shown to be less interested than his peers. This could mean many, many different things, but saying that thinking Riz is asexual but not aromantic is being on the fence is discounting real people who are asexual and not aromantic.

It's not all or nothing. I'm not out to get you or hurt anyone. It just frustrates me when people state their interpretations of media as facts and get upset when other people have different interpretations. Your interpretation isn't more valid just because it's more diverse. That would be like me reading a book where someone was never stated to have a race, but I decided that their character would make more sense if they were black, so now they're canonically black, even though I don't know what the author imagined them like. Just because it's adding diversity doesn't make it more morally correct. It doesn't make it more incorrect either. It just makes it your interpretation.

I know you're probably sick of hearing this, but it's up for interpretation, and you can't fault people for having a different interpretation of a character.

[scattered-winter]

the funny thing about being aro is that I am genuinely afraid of being alone for the rest of my life, but if anyone even STARTS to imply that it's because I'm never gonna have a joyful and fulfilled life without a romantic partner it makes me so mad I see red

[aroacettorney]

dont mind me. im simply just putting together a ludgercasey angst collection.

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