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#bonus parent adventures
major-gilneass · 1 year
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Since we have split custody and only get the kiddo every other weekend, we’re celebrating Non-Binary Parents Day for me today! The kiddo planned a Beetlejuice theme for me. They planned breakfast with “BJ foods,” sent me on a scavenger hunt to find all the times they’d hidden “BJ” around their room, and we were going to have Beetlejuice art time and a viewing of the movie, but decided it was lunch time.
Also that Beetlejuice the movie is not suitable for them at this age. 😬
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antiquepearlss · 1 month
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It’s 1am I’m very tired but really quick before I go to bed
consider this…modern au stay at home dad Eugene Fitzherbert
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artemistorm · 10 months
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Story idea where the 5 younger Links (Wind, Wild, Legend, Hyrule, Four) all get captured (by yiga/mercenaries/monsters/slave traders etc.) and the older 4 (Time, Twilight, Warriors, Sky) have to go rescue them.
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mx-mongoose · 1 year
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Portal OC idea
They’re a test subject waking from stasis but thing is though is that they’re blind. So whoever Core is guiding them or just with them in general, the subject thinks they’re a human employee that just really hates being touched and is tall. They don’t even know that everybody is dead and it’s just robots inhabiting the facility mostly.
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menopause-diary · 5 months
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The Quest for Patience: Adventures in Being a Bonus-Mom
If anyone finds my patience, please return it. It seems I’ve misplaced it somewhere between “Do I really have to?” and “But I did that last year!” As the bonus mom to my boyfriend’s kids, my days often feel like navigating a minefield of whining, dramatic sighs, and the occasional eye-roll symphony. My beautiful “bonus” family ♥️ Take, for example, the simple task of doing dishes. You’d think…
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ace-turned-confused · 4 months
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sea spray | dbf!joel miller x f!reader
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joel masterlist
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summary: a relaxing weekend break by the sea is just what you need, but spending it under the same roof as joel miller might not be the kind of relaxing you had in mind word count: 3,4k warnings: 18+ only, reader is able-bodied / wears a bikini & a dress / can swim, pet names, unspecified age gap, food & alcohol consumption, smut, m masturbation, oral (f receiving), fingering, squirting, unprotected p in v, spitting, creampie, overstimulation, joel's filthy mouth, praise kink, size kink a/n: i actually did spend the past weekend by the sea, unfortunately without joel miller 😔 written for @mermaidgirl30's Ocean Challenge! of course it took the entire timeframe of your challenge for inspiration to strike, but it was super fun! 🩵 big hugs to @morallyinept for beta'ing & the kind words, your message legit put the biggest grin on my face LMAO ily 💜
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Going away with your parents for a long weekend is just what you need — walks along the cliff path, cocktails on the beach, lounging in the sun. Plus the bonus of free accommodation and your meals being paid for. You’re long overdue for a break and this will be a good change of scenery.
The bricks burn through your sandals as you unload your bags. Midday sun blazing down on you, you’re desperate for a cold shower after two hours of traffic to get here.
“Hello?”
You’re met with silence as you push open the front door, a rare breeze coming through the windows. They must’ve gone into town. Kicking off your shoes, you pad through to your room at the back of the house and dump your bags.
You peel your clothes off and run a shower, washing off the sweat and stress of the morning. Unpacking your bags, most of your weekend attire is swimsuits and dresses; you’ll just be floating around the house the rest of the day and decide on a blue and white check bikini, pulling on plain linen shorts.
Making your way upstairs, the rest of the house is still, the only sound coming from slow waves rolling against the rocks. Kelp bobs up and down in the swell and wispy clouds dot the sky, you pull your phone out to snap some pictures to send to your friends, relishing in the tranquillity.
You hear muted footsteps and turn around, expecting to see your parents come up the stairs. Instead, you’re met with Joel Miller — your dad's best friend with nothing but a thin towel hanging low on his hips.
“Oh! Didn’t uh- didn’t hear you come in sweetheart.”
Your eyes flicker down as he adjusts his towel — he clears his throat and you snap your eyes back up to his face.
“I got in about half an hour ago, I just got out of the shower. I didn’t know you’d be here.”
“Your old man told me to come up for the weekend, he didn’t mention what time they’d be back this afternoon though.”
You nod and turn to look outside again, the image of Joel in his towel now burned into your mind. You don’t ask him about it — no possible explanation would stop your mind from wandering.
You were much younger the last time you saw him — just a sweet girl harbouring an innocent crush on a handsome man. Now you’re far from sweet, and that crush is far from innocent. This is the most you’ve ever seen of him — greying curls in every direction, wide chest into a soft tummy, dark trail of hair below his navel disappearing beneath his towel.
You can feel a wet spot forming on your bikini bottoms — so much for a relaxing weekend.
-
Joel’s seen you in passing and heard about your various achievements and adventures from your parents, but it’s been years since he spent so much time with you in such close quarters. He can’t remember you being so… grown up.
Seeing you stand there in just your bikini, your eyes flitting down to his towel, he almost instantly began to harden. Maybe some light conversation will calm him down.
“So, what you got planned for the rest of the day?”
You turn to face him again and he takes a steadying breath.
“I was gonna head down to the beach but it’s fucking hot out, so I think I’ll just be lazy here instead.”
“Pool’s nice if you’re keen on a swim.”
You slink past to head downstairs, stopping in front of him to look up at him.
“You wanna join me?”
“Think I’ll uh, sit this one out. Don’t worry ‘bout me.”
Scratching at the nape of his neck as you descend the stairs, he’s not sure how he’s going to survive this weekend. He shouldn’t be looking at you like this — you’re young, spritely, his best friend’s daughter — but he watches out the window anyway as you pull down your shorts, glass in hand, and dip down into the water.
He sneaks off to his room before you can notice.
-
Sitting on the edge of the bed with his head tilted to the ceiling, he’s already fully hard. He lets the towel fall open and wraps a hand around his throbbing cock. He shouldn’t do this, but who’s going to know?
Stroking himself with long, slow pumps, he closes his eyes and all he can see is you. Ass peeking out the edge of your bottoms, your tits spilling out your bikini top, so much skin. You sighed as you sat down in the water, a breathy, satiated sound — he wishes he could make those sounds spill from your mouth.
Precome leaking from his tip, he’s reaching his end embarrassingly fast. Speeding up to fist himself tightly, he imagines your hand wrapped around his cock instead. He imagines burying his tongue, fingers, cock into your cunt, tight and wet and his to have however he pleases.
It takes just one, two, three more strokes of his cock and he sinks his teeth into his bottom lip, biting back a moan as he comes, spilling milky ropes across his hand and lower stomach. Using the same towel to clean up his mess, he tells himself he won’t do this again, he can’t do this again.
He shifts up to lean against the headboard as he comes down from his high, deciding to stay clear of you until your parents get home. Keeping you out of sight is the best way forward, even if he can’t keep you out of his mind.
-
You spend the rest of the day in the pool, nursing a Long Island iced tea and paging through your book. Joel doesn’t show face again, but it’s for the best — you can’t stop thinking about that damn towel and how easily it could slip down.
Your phone rings and pulls you from your daydreaming; you haul yourself out of the pool and pat yourself dry, fingertips wrinkled from the water. You see it’s your mom calling, and slide to answer.
You don’t get a chance to say hello and she’s bombarding you with questions.
“Hi, sweetie! How was the drive? I hope you didn’t have too much traffic. Oh! And did you see Joel? He’s with us for the weekend, maybe he went out for the day too.”
You certainly did see Joel. You still can even with your eyes closed.
“Hi, Mom. The drive was fine, and Joel’s been here the whole day.”
“That’s nice. I hope you don’t mind, you two always got along well so your father didn’t think to tell you beforehand. Listen, why don’t you and Joel come through to town for dinner with us? I’ll send you the restaurant name.”
“Yeah, okay sure. See you soon.”
“Bye, sweetie. See you.”
She hangs up the phone and you venture inside to find Joel, heading towards the spare room. Pressing your ear to the door, you don’t hear any movement. Maybe he’s sleeping.
“Joel?” You knock on the door and hear rustling, he responds a few moments later.
“Yeah? You can- you can come in.”
You nudge the door open and he’s sitting up in bed, sheets pulled to the same height his towel was hanging earlier and it takes everything you have not to stare, debate if he’s still got that towel on or is stark naked.
Stepping just over the threshold, you lean against the wall to steady yourself and focus your eyes on his face.
“My mom called, she said we must go into town to meet them for dinner. She texted me the address.”
“Sounds good, I can drive us. I’ll just uh, get ready.”
You nod and retreat from his room in silence — you’ll be able to hold a conversation once he’s fully clothed.
-
Tonight’s restaurant is right along the shoreline, carved into the cliffside. It’s a good climb down the hillside and you’re glad you’re wearing flats, mentally noting to go easy on the drinks tonight to make it back up again. Gentle waves lap against the rocks and the sea breeze is just the refresher you need after a hot summer day.
You’ve changed into a strappy dress, the hemline falling just above your knees and Joel’s in a loose button-down and board shorts. Your parents are sitting across from you, and they’d spent the better part of an hour asking you about work and romantic prospects.
Once satisfied with your answers, they turn to focus on each other, leaving you and Joel to your own devices. With them both engrossed in conversation, you try and test the waters.
You shift your legs under the table and bump your knee into Joel’s — his hand falters as he scoops more food onto his spoon, but doesn’t pull away. You push further, pressing your thigh against his and he stills completely, peering at you out of the corner of his eye.
The unfortunate combination of the summer heat and your heavy hand when pouring your drink earlier has made you fearless. You snake a hand below the table, resting it dangerously close to the growing bulge in his shorts.
He drops his spoon, catching your dad’s attention.
“You alright?”
“Yeah, uh… Yeah, fine.” He swallows and gives them a tight smile, waiting for them to continue their conversation.
“What the hell are you doin’?” Joel practically hisses at you under his breath, eyes flashing in your direction.
You ignore him and flatten your hand, unsure if the heat you can feel is radiating from him or yourself. You continue moving upwards, the tips of your fingers brushing against the outline of his cock.
“Tell me to stop and I will.” You whisper back to him, unmoving in your chair.
You start palming him through his shorts, angling your head to look at him and a fresh wave of arousal floods your panties.
“Sweetheart, you can’t be doin’ this. Not here.”
“Say stop and I will.”
His eyes flutter closed, taking in a shaky breath. It feels like he’s already fully hard.
Just when you think you’ve won, your parents stand up and you rip your hand away, heart racing in your chest. Caught up in your teasing you hadn’t noticed they’d finished dessert and paid the bill. You look at your dad with wide eyes, hoping nobody saw anything.
“Nice dinner, everyone. Good to have you here, kiddo. We’ll see you back at the house, been a long day.”
“Um, yeah, we’ll follow you guys.” You hope you sound less startled than you feel. 
He rounds the table, a hand coming down on your and Joel’s shoulders and he walks off. You and Joel stand to follow him — your mind foggy with lust, you can feel his eyes burn into you, but you don’t dare look at him.
-
Arriving home after a charged car ride with Joel, your parents say goodnight and their door shuts behind them. The room falls silent, you’re unsure who will make the first move. Joel grabs onto your arm, dragging you through the house.
“What?”
“Don’t play dumb with me now, sweetheart. You’re gonna finish what you started.”
He pulls your dress over your head, leaving you in just your bra and panties. Pushing you onto your bed, his eyes trail up and down your figure as you lie before him.
“What were you doing all afternoon? Didn’t see you at all.”
“You wanna know what I was doing?”
You nod and he leans down to speak into your ear, voice low and raspy.
“I was thinkin’ of you, baby. That skimpy little bikini of yours got me all hard, so instead of spendin’ my time out by the beach, I was jacking off in my room and all I could think of was you.”
A shiver runs down your spine, a small whine escaping at his words.
“Thought a lotta things about how you’d be, now we’re gonna see how much of it is true.”
He pushes you down to lie on your back, pulling your panties down. You try to cross your legs out of habit and he grabs your knees, spreading you open before him.
“Now we’re shy, are we? Don’t want me seeing this pretty pussy?”
He cups you entirely and you tilt your hips, chasing the friction of his palm against your clit.
“After that little game you played just now, you’re gonna take what I give you, and you’re gonna enjoy it.”
He wraps his arms under your legs, dragging you to the edge of the bed and drops to his knees, draping one leg over each of his shoulders. You look down at him and he stares into your eyes, flattening his tongue against you and licking a broad stripe up through your folds. He sucks your clit into his mouth, tongue swirling in tight circles and your head falls back against the bed.
“Oh, fuck, Joel.”
He chuckles into you, causing you to moan again.
“Better than the boys you normally go out with?”
He doesn’t give you time to answer, tongue circling your clit again and he drags his fingers up and down, coating them in your arousal. Pushing two fingers into your cunt, the stretch is already far more than with your own — you’re not sure how you’ll ever satisfy yourself after this.
He pumps his fingers in and out, in and out, curling them upwards and you feel heat spreading across your abdomen, your legs just beginning to tremble. You move your hands into his hair, tugging on his curls and he groans against you, speeding up his movements.
“You gonna come for me?”
“Please, Joel. Oh, god, please.”
“Go on then, come. I know you can.”
You tighten your grip on his hair, legs going stiff as you come on his fingers and his movements don’t stop, tongue flicking back and forth over your clit, fingers fucking into you relentlessly to drag out your high. With no chance to recover, he pushes a third finger into you, his pace never faltering.
“Joel, please. It’s too much.”
He pulls off from you just enough to speak, a devilish grin on his face.
“Say stop and I will. I told you you were gonna take what I gave you.”
Mouth latching onto you again, he ignores your protesting, eyes boring into your own. You can see him rutting into the side of the bed and your moans turn into whines and whimpers, the heat pooling at the base of your spine more intense than before.
“Come on, sweetheart, be a good girl for me.”
Pushing his free hand down onto you, he curls his fingers inside of you, grazing over that one spongy spot and your vision blurs. You dig your heels into his back, hips lifting off the bed as you come again, a warm stream of liquid soaking his beard that’s scratching at your inner thighs.
Chest heaving as you come down, he pulls his fingers out and sucks one into his mouth, licking it clean.
“Better than I imagined.”
He leans over you, shoving his other two sticky fingers into your mouth and you whine at tasting yourself on him.
“All that messing around and look where it got you.”
He unbuttons his shirt agonisingly slowly, a smirk spreading across his face. His eyes are blown wide, beard slick with your release as he trails his fingertips up and down your leg, the small hairs standing in his wake. You close your legs and flop back onto the bed, already feeling spent.
“Just one more thing I needa see for myself.”
Finally pulling his shorts down, that tantalising trail of hair you saw this morning spreads into wiry curls surrounding the base of his cock. He’s bigger than anyone else you’ve ever been with, fully stiff as he takes himself in his hand with long strokes — thick, throbbing, and precome pearling from his tip.
“Are you gonna fuck my mouth?”
He draws circles into your leg, still stroking himself.
“Not this time. Wanna feel how tight this pussy’s gonna squeeze my cock.”
Not this time. You clench around nothing in anticipation, and he starts crawling up the bed to you.
“Be good and maybe we can use that mouth of yours another day.”
Propping yourself up on your elbows, Joel drags himself through your wetness, nudging the tip of his cock against your clit.
“Gonna be a tight fit, sweetheart. Might just ruin this cunt for anyone else.”
He lines himself up with your entrance, both of your eyes locked on where you join. Pushing in just past his tip, your mouth falls open with a strangled moan.
“Warned you. Feels good, doesn’t it?” All you do is whimper in response.
“Gonna feel even better.”
He sheaths himself completely inside of you, hair at his base pressed against your clit and balls pressed against your ass. It’s the most stretched out you’ve ever been — it’s also the best you’ve ever felt and he hasn’t even started moving.
He leans over you and starts grinding his hips, pulling your bra down. Pinching a hardened nipple between his fingers, he takes the other into his mouth, swirling his tongue just the same as before.
You lock your ankles behind his back, legs wrapped around his waist and arms wrapped around his neck, holding onto him as if you’d float away. He lifts his head, a trail of spit connecting his lips to your breast. Bringing a hand up to your face, he squeezes your cheeks to force your mouth open, looking into your eyes as he spits into the back of your throat.
You moan quietly, clenching around his length and he huffs a laugh, shaking his head.
“Dirty girl. You let other boys spit into your mouth, too?”
You shake your head clumsily and tighten your legs, trying your hardest to grind yourself against him.
“What’s wrong, baby? What happened to it’s too much?”
He straightens up and pries your legs off him, pressing them into your chest. His eyes are dark as he watches how you squirm and stretch around him. He angles his head forward, letting another string of saliva fall from his mouth onto your cunt and it drips down around his cock.
Using two fingers, he puts slight pressure on your clit but doesn’t move.
“You’re gonna come on my cock, and then I’m gonna come inside you. Understand?”
You’re not sure how to string words together on your own accord anymore, clit throbbing and cunt stretched out, mind filled with just Joel.
“Hey, repeat after me, come on: I’m gonna be a good girl.”
“I’m gonna be a… a good girl.”
“Next: I’m gonna come on your big cock.”
“I’m gonna come- on your big cock.”
“And to finish off: You’re gonna come inside me.”
“You’re… gonna come inside me.”
“Was that so difficult?”
He readjusts his grip on your legs and starts pounding into you, the force of his thrusts shifting you up and down, your clit rubbing against his steady fingers. Your moans are only broken by the need for more air, your voice becoming hoarse and getting higher and higher in pitch as he keeps going harder.
You start clamping down on him, the day’s heat and your teasing and the way he’s using you relentlessly quickly becoming too much.
“Come on, sweetheart. You’ve been such a good girl. Come one last time for me and I’ll fill you up.”
His words push you over the edge and he keeps fucking into you as you come. You reach down to hold onto him, your hands wrapping around his arm and you dig your nails into his skin, carving out crescent moons.
Through the ringing in your ears, you can hear him grunting, his resolve finally breaking after a few more thrusts as he spills inside of you, your walls coated in his spend as the warmth spreads throughout your body. He loosens his hold on your legs, bringing them down and massages your tired muscles.
Pulling out of you, you feel his come slowly leak out and down your folds, landing in thick droplets on the sheets. You turn onto your side, sleep already creeping up on you and he drops down behind you, his chest pressed against your back and softening cock against your ass.
“We’re going to the beach tomorrow, and I wanna see what other little outfits you got with you. Try another game like you did tonight, though, and I’m gonna have to put you in your place again.”
You huff a laugh, a gentle, satisfied smile on your face. This long weekend is suddenly far more exciting than you prepared for.
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comments & reblogs are hugely appreciated, forehead kisses to all 💜
dividers by @saradika-graphics
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theveryworstthing · 8 months
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The Witch's Granddaughters
local witches Mishthill Vine and her husband Joe found a very badly woven basket full of strange infants and wildflowers on their doorstep about 26 years ago. they did not have to read the note tucked in with the babies to figure out that their daughter had found a new way to give them migraines. 
everybody wants to be a monster-fucker, but nobody wants to deal with the results. 
Ashe and Arrow rarely see their parents but they don't really mind anymore. they used to go on little holiday adventures with them when their mom remembered they existed (or needed something from Maw and PopPop) but that was... A Lot. these days they're full grown witches plotting out adventures of their own while helping their grandparents keep the local magic bullshit under control. 
they're good kids. 
bonus:
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shanieveh · 1 year
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when im no longer young and beautiful...
— growing old with the genshin men
you both wander the world — kazuha, KAVEH, itto, bennett, TARTAGLIA, kaeya, xingqiu, heizou
Even as years and decades go by, you and him travel the world in order to really feel its beauty. And the best part? Even as your hair color turns gray, you both were still together. And it was the most beautiful part in all your adventures.
Seeing every single part of the world and cherishing all it's glory. You were glad to do it with him, his smile never really changed after all these years. In some cheesy way, in all your adventures his utter joy is the best view.
settling in and starting a family— alhaitham, DILUC, ayato, thoma, TIGHNARI, gorou, tartaglia
It probably is adopting or other means, but with him you finally have family. Full of cheers, full of parenting but always full of love. Every day you were never alone, there was never an instance where you felt unwanted. Home. That was one word to describe it.
But watching all your little babies grow up was the hardest part, and as they all go on and live their lives he was still there. Doing the same lovey dovey gestures he did when you first fell in love, when you married, and when you grow old in each other's arms.
living a quiet life— kaeya, xiao, THOMA, tighnari, CYNO, dainsleif, SCARAMOUCHE, KAVEH, albedo
Both of you have gone through so much, and this domestic bliss is really the heaven. The happy ending. Everyday growing the plants to eat, doing laundry, cleaning the dishes. These little mundane tasks, just being in each other's presence. No one to bother you, no more pain. Just... peace.
Even as time fades by like sunsets in the afternoon, it never really got boring. Just living in a simple house, sleeping in an always disorganized bed. Playing with the little kids in the farm. You couldn't ask for anything else, with him by your side you couldn't ask for anything more. Because what else can you even ask for when this is enough.
still acts like young couples— kaeya, ALHAITHAM, xingqiu, VENTI, heizou, itto, cyno, ZHONGLI
It doesn't matter even if wrinkles cover your face, he would still kiss every part of you. The same over the top pet names. Still twirling you around like your first date. Still sharing the same straw in your favorite drink. Sometimes people would share a look of judgment but he really didn't care.
Dancing in the rain, the water droplets as your very own music. Laughter as your melody. 5 years.. turned to 20 years turned to 30 years. Even then the dance never had actual steps, more so the tapping and intimacy of two soulmates in the comfort of the rain.
BONUS: visiting your grave— scaramouche, VENTI, zhongli, xiao, DAINSLEIF, pierro, albedo
Knowing that one day his immortality would catch up, he cherished every single day with you. And for a very long time he never had been so happy—so content. Looking at your grave, one that he himself carved your favorite flowers. Making a garden surrounding it. It became more of a haven for him, rather than a mouring spot.
He was grateful for everything, the memories, the time even if finite, and you. His mind always full of war for a minute... finally became happy. He finally learned to be grateful for what he had. And even years after your death, he was still so glad... that you grew old with him.
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mintsuwu · 6 months
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Took a lil break from the asks in order to cook some ✨SMILING CRITTERS FAMILY TIME✨ with @rexmk0153universe-blog because why the hell not??? I might have to divide it in two parts though-
(1/2)
DogDay
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DogDay's journey begins when a stork delivers him to the wrong family of wolves, leading him to be adopted by Big Bad's parents. However, his presence triggers jealousy in Big Bad, his adopted older brother, who resents the attention their parents give to the newcomer.
Despite the pack's focus on abilities related to weather phenomena, Dogday stands out due to his unique qualities and talents. As he grows older, he feels a deep longing for a sense of purpose and identity beyond his wolf upbringing. Seeking to find his true self, he leaves the pack and ventures to Jolly Valley, where he encounters the Smiling Critters and forms close bonds with them. Over time, Dogday becomes a leader among the Smiling Critters, embodying their values of friendship and unity.
Big Bad, driven by pride and a mix of emotions, followed Dogday to Jolly Valley, intending to both antagonize his little brother and secretly monitor his progress. Despite his outward bravado and mischievous nature causing ocassional trouble, Dogday remains welcoming towards his older brother, except when his antics go too far. Hus unwavering cheerfulness and open-heartedness serve as a beacon of hope for both the Smiling Critters and his troubled older brother.
BONUS: "Big Bad" is actually a nickname! His actual name is "WindWolf"... Dogday usually calls him "Big Bro", but the rest of the critters "misheard" it and began calling him "Big Bad", much to his dismay.
CatNap
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Catnap shares a unique connection with a deity known as SandMan, who reigns over the Dream Realm, a distinct reality separate from the main universe. The origin of Catnap traces back to a moment when Dogday, as a young member of his pack, made a wish upon a shooting star for a friend, and this wish brought Catnap into existence.
SandMan took particular interest in Catnap due to his remarkable qualities, leading to a special father-son dynamic between them, despite Catnap starting off as just another creation of SandMan like many others.
Catnap, however, felt a strong pull to leave the Dream Realm in search of Dogday, the source of his creation. Eventually, the feline succeeded in finding Dogday and chose to remain by his side, along with the other Smiling Critters. Despite Catnap's origin in the Dream Realm and his connection to SandMan, his loyalty lies with Dogday and their companions, forging a lasting bond beyond the confines of the Dream Realm.
Kickin'Chicken
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Kickin'Chicken comes from a predominantly female family, consisting of his mother, sisters, and himself as the middle sibling. His father, known as "Rockin'Rooster," is a famous singer, an example that Kickin' aspires to follow. However, Rockin'Rooster's focus on his career leaves little time for family, causing conflicting emotions for Kickin'. Despite his admiration for his father's success, Kickin' yearns for more attention and connection within the family... Yet he hides it under his "cool and tough guy" persona.
However, among his family members Kickin' has a strong bond with his older sister, Pecky. She is level-headed compared to Kickin', but shares his adventurous spirit and openness to new experiences and people.
BONUS: Kickin's family is quite fond of Bubba Bubbaphant, given how he was Kickin's first friend and all of them consider him another member of the family.
CraftyCorn
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Craftycorn, born in a magical kingdom governed by four elemental monarchs (Clubs, Diamonds, Hearts and Spades) was raised as the daughter of the Queen of Spades, destined to become a warrior. However, Crafty harbored a distaste for violence, finding joy in art and nature instead.
Despite her mother's attempts to grant her freedom to choose her path within the elemental realms, the other rulers disapproved, doubting Crafty's suitability for the throne. When Craftycorn was to receive her royal Merry Charm, symbolizing her assigned role, she unexpectedly manifested her own charm—the flower. Fearing disappointment from her mother and influenced by the other monarchs, Craftycorn fled her home, unaware of the devastation her departure caused her mother.
Their relationship is complicated, marked by love and care, yet tinged with Crafty's mixed feelings towards her mother.
LoolaLamb
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Loola is a special sheep born into a flock known as the "Sleep Sheep" or "Slumbering Guardians." These sheep have the unique role of wandering through villages, signaling to people that it's time to sleep and seek safety from the dangers of the night. Once their task is complete, SandMan, a mystical entity who the sheep "worship" due to its previous helps toward the flock, can traverse their realm to ensure everyone enjoys peaceful dreams and restful sleep.
She's the daughter of the flock's leader, tasked with protecting the sheep, particularly during the day when they're less vigilant due to needing rest after their nightly duties. However, Loola lost her mother at a young age and was raised by her father, who prepared her to take on a similar role in the future.
Despite her upbringing, Loola yearns for adventure and exploration beyond the confines of her flock's duties. After much persuasion, her father allows her to leave, although they maintain communication through letters.
The lamb often travels alone, but occasionally spends time with the Smiling Critters in Jolly Valley for extended periods of time.
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fluffykiddosstuff · 1 year
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stanford and stanley pines fighting for you (headcanons)
i just played swooning over stans and...help i'm so obsessed with these two now..here is littles headcanons for them when they are both in love with you :-)
warnings : swearing (thank you stanley), gn!reader, using they/them pronouns, mention of child abuse
context : the kids are gone, the grunkles are on adventures, so to their surprise when they came back for a month, they saw you in the living room (stanley almost hit you with a stick if ford and soos didn't got him), soos explain to them that you got banished from your home and came to the shack late at night under the rain. Pitty hitting them since they know damn well what a lonely life is, they let you stay and life goes on..well not as they expected...
stanley pines :
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at first he tries to deny what he feels, you are friends, right ?
if you laugh at his jokes, swear with him against things he dislikes (tv-shows, young people ect..), and that you help him annoy poeple by stealing and other things ? My man is head over heals
you can see he start to grow fond of you when he wants to protect you even more than before, especially since he knows what is gravity falls made of
when you where gone for shopping with soos, he decided it was time to annonce it to his dear twin brother
he would talk about it while watching a romance movie with ford (even tho he said he didn't wanted to watch)
"you know, i start to kinda like them..but like like them you see.."
the pills doesn't pass well when ford says he likes you too
stan is definitely the most childish one
"let's make a bet sixer ! the first to got a date with them wins !"
he likes to come in while ford tries to show you something or even tries to speak to you
he even broke down ford's clock so he would be late to your weekly monster's chase
he still as limits of course, ford is his twin brother after all, and it's only little jokes that doesn't harm anyone right ?
will definitly show off with his boxing skills or by putting a nice suit (for exemple the one in the gif) while you all go out together for a party or something, will try to do sport everyday but heh, he is a little bit too old to do those things daily..
gives you his jacket when you are outside with him, even if you aren't cold, when he sees ford's face when he smells his cologne on you while you both work on something, i'ts worth it
gives you flowers and little gifts, puts them on your bed for you to find when you come back
verbally says what he thinks about you, while ford can't even say two lines in a phrase when all he wanted to say is that your outfit was pretty
stanford pines :
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he mainly start to realise he likes you when you helped him with his reasearches for a creature, he is amazed by how much you are interested in his work and doesn't hesitate to take you as an assistant and answer all of your questions
man did he regret telling stan's about his feelins for you, now his life is a living hell (sometimes he thinks about going back in the other dimension by how stan can be extremely annoying, really)
you only get free time with him when you are both in the forest to hunt monsters, you talk for hours about many toppics
smarter than stan, he tries to make you more open around him, asking you about personnal stuff and trying to comfort you when things gets too hard for you to tell, he even experienced to make hugs (bc my dude is awkard) and he purposelly hugs you in front of stan while you are crying about something related from your abusive parents, bonus point if you say : "oh ford..what would i do without you..", he would look at his twin, sticking out his tongue in a proud grin, revenge is a plate you eat cold they said
when you are all watching a show on the t-v and that it's his turn to choose the movie, even if he is dying to watch a documentary, he puts an horror movie and sits next to you, watching you take his hand as a loud noises his heard or hugs you if you are too scared
when you both work and you pass out on a table, he first puts his long jacket on you, and if it gets too late, he takes you in his arms to put you in your bed, all while him and stan are having a "who is gonna look the more angry at eachother" contest
when stan swears , he likes to take him back, especially if you don't like that either (or if it's not the right moment or the right place to do those) of course it doesn't stop him for saying : "for fuck's sake" or "fucking little nerd" while you laugh with ford
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major-gilneass · 1 year
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My child is not blood-related to me, but I swear they are my clone sometimes.
Who gave this kid my attitude?
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rainerioun · 2 months
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𝖶𝖧𝖤𝖱𝖤 𝖶𝖨𝖫𝖫 𝖸𝖮𝖴 𝖡𝖤 𝖨𝖭 2 𝖸𝖤𝖠𝖱𝖲? | 𝗉𝗂𝖼𝗄 𝖺 𝖼𝖺𝗋𝖽.
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— Hello! I know this is a shorter post, but I wanted to share something. This was requested anonymously, so thank you for the suggestion! ♥
ORIGINAL DATE POSTED : JUNE 16TH, 2024.
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HOW TO CHOOSE A PILE : The outcome may vary based on whether you receive clear messages visually or intuitively. If you resonate more with selecting a pile visually, trust that inclination. Personally, I believe the notion that 'looks can deceive,' so I prefer to take a deep breath and close my eyes, allowing the pile I'm meant to connect with to come to me. You might see the color of the pile, sense or hear a number, or simply feel its overall vibe.
Please don’t redistribute or edit my content.
MUST READ + MASTERLIST. | KO-FI.
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PILE ONE
Where Will You Be In 2 Years? The Empress [Reversed], The Chariot, Knight of Wands [Reversed].
In two years, you're definitely the one in control. If you're facing any hurdles, especially with dreams left unattended or ideas just lingering without action, that fades away over time. You might still encounter creative blocks and timing issues, but you'll handle them much more effectively, learning self-control and taking decisive action. You'll realize that your accomplishments don't solely define you; they're just an added bonus. You should know to slow down, it will grant you a clearer perspective to seeking security.
What Energy Will You Radiate? Networker — Light : Enhances unity through sharing of information. Engenders social awareness and empathy. Shadow : Conveys information only for person gain. Spreads fear and falsehood.  The Merchant : Self-worth, Trade. 
You could find yourself in a more social setting or perhaps in a higher position in your career, whether it's the same job or a new one. You're confident but not cocky, aware of your self-worth, and others notice this too. In some way, you seem to be a messenger, spreading kindness. This doesn't have to be taken literally; it could relate to anything. Whatever came to mind when you read that might be it.
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PILE TWO
Where Will You Be In 2 Years? Ten of Pentacles, Knight of Swords, The Tower.
If you're starting something you've been wanting to begin or have been thinking about it, know now is the right time to do it. The next two years will be intense and different from what you're used to, but you can handle it. All your hard work will definitely pay off. In two years, you'll achieve what you wanted—be it wealth, security, or some kind of success. This will finally become permanent. However, expect significant changes, some of which you may not like at first. Any upheaval or chaos is just a way to build an even stronger foundation. For those considering starting a family, think about your circumstances carefully. Don't rush. This aspect will bloom within the coming years.
What Energy Will You Radiate? Queen — Light : Radiates the regal feminine. Uses her benevolent authority to protect others. Shadow : Becomes arrogant when authority is challenged. Controlling and demanding.  The Adventurer : Responsibility, Expectations.
Again, for those considering starting a family—if not, feel free to skip this part—you'll find yourself strongly in the parental role. This doesn't necessarily mean with a human child; just know you'll feel content. Some of you might be stressing over the mere thought, but rest assured, it'll bring fulfillment. As for the rest of you, you'll develop a stronger sense of responsibility. However, this doesn't mean you can't explore. The next few years are about stabilizing, rebuilding what's been lost, but in two years, you'll regain your 'freedom' once more. You are always the one in control, don't get lost in a little box.
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PILE THREE
Where Will You Be In 2 Years? King of Swords, Seven of Cups, Four of Wands.
Pile three, you'll find yourself in a place of mental and physical clarity. It's a very calm and peaceful state. You're enjoying life, with a sense of harmony and relaxation. Home feels like a welcoming place. You deserve this, so keep following your instincts. There are many paths and decisions ahead, but there's no wrong choice. You get to decide for yourself. Whatever starts now will lead to peace in the future. While life won't be stress-free, you'll accept the struggles, not rushing to figure everything out immediately.
What Energy Will You Radiate? Hermit — Light : Seeks Solitude to focus intently on inner life. Serves personal creativity. Shadow : Withdraws from society out of fear or negative judgements of others. Refusing to help those in need.  The Vengeance : Overcoming Slights, A Choice. 
In two years, I envision you embracing the homebody life, in your own zone. It's all about you and your close circle. You'll find contentment in solitude, focusing on the little things with acceptance—chores, hobbies, and everyday routines. When I think of this scenario, I see someone sitting in a chair, leisurely watching their pet play without a worry in the world. It's a heartwarming scene; some of you might even welcome a new pet into your life. In two years, it's a time for retreat, and if you believe you can get there, you will.
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tossawary · 7 months
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Thinking about the family arrangements of the "Howl's Moving Castle" film, specifically the question of where Markl (Howl's young apprentice) (pretty different from the Michael of the books) comes from... I do like the idea that Howl essentially took in an orphaned child whom he found on the street or something, because I like seeing adopted families. They're cool. It's cute.
Or maybe there was some complicated situation (curses, spells, adventures, oh my) with Markl's parents? Who can't care for him or can't be trusted to care for him, but they're still out there? If you want to get into the "messy bio family situation" side of adoption issues.
While thinking about this, my brain took a leap to the side and asked, "Even if I really don't like a 'Howl and Markl are biological family' angle on this, is there a way to pull that off?" In the books, Howl performs several extended courtships of beautiful women, so I suppose that you could just go with him having accidentally had a child with one of his exes or something. Easy enough. I still prefer the adoption of an orphan route.
And then I thought, "WAIT. If Howl has a reputation for seducing women, eating hearts, and then running off, then it would be really easy for some young girl with an unwanted pregnancy to CLAIM to her unhappy parents that the wandering Wizard Howl fathered her child." So then Howl could get saddled with a small child dumped on his doorstep and told to take responsibility as a father, even though he's never met this woman in his life!
And I thought that sounded like a really funny balance between the ambiguous situation of the movie and the style of humor of the books. That sounds like a Wynne-Jonesian situation to me! Sophie has to wrestle with her admiration that Howl selflessly took in this poor, unwanted child (Markl) and is raising him as best as he's able (for a given value of "best"), and also wrestle with her annoyance that Howl's reputation as a flirt is such a fucking mess that he has a "bastard" child who isn't even actually his bio kid.
Even funnier bonus interpretations / directions for this, in my opinion: (1) Howl is a trans man and is physically incapable of knocking anyone up without magic being involved. (Sophie and Howl have a kid in the books named Morgan.) The girl making the claim did not know this and Howl did not enlighten anyone.
(2) If it happened once (a girl successfully claiming that Howl is the father of her unwanted child despite never having met him), then it can happen again! Sophie knows Howl didn't cheat on her, but she's still not impressed by this mess. (Maybe this is where Morgan comes from in this AU.)
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yan-randomfandom · 20 days
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Theraprism!Bill Cipher & GoLB!Reader
[DRABBLE] had a chat w my friend abt Golb from Adventure Time, and with the stronger-than-bill godly reader fics here rn, i got this idea! although this isn't romance, just pure mockery between cosmic beings
You smiled. His bulging eye narrowed in return.
"Oh, Billy, you never fail to look just like your parents when you're at your worst."
He grew drastically larger in size, overwhelmed with rage and hatred, but the white room only limits him from becoming his full potential. The red color that dominated his body overpowered any other light, and Bill Cipher truly, desperately hated that fact.
As an embodiment of chaos and destruction, you oversee every detail, even the smallest speck, within your domain. Though, who's to say that everything already isn't within you?
And, of course... This guy?
"When they said I had a special guest today, I didn't expect it to be you, GOLB," he seethed, jabbing a finger at the glass separating you two. The action didn't really mean much when his enormous, glowing eye was taking the entirety of your vision.
"So, what? You came here to mock me? Aren't you supposed to be out destroying universes or something?"
Your smile widened. "Who said I wasn't?"
Bill paused, falling silent as he shrank back to his original size. His red hue turned yellow. Shame. He looked best when he was his father's color.
...
"Well, shucks," he scoffed, leaning back in his chair. "I suppose I should feel honored you’re here. Never realized I’d caught your attention, you freak."
"Always have. Especially after that little fiasco back on earth," you mused, a chuckle escaping your mouth. "I just came by to see how you're doing. You don't look so hot, Bill Cipher."
"Ugh, what, are you about to lecture me on how a human beat me?" he sneered as he crossed his arms. "Because I promise you he didn't—"
"Humans... are peculiar," you interrupted his rant early. Apparently, he didn't appreciate that and glared at you. "They have something we otherworldly beings don't. You know, if I had the choice, I'd choose to be human."
Bill sighed rather dramatically. "All those sappy feelings and weak bodies? You should be glad we don't have that. It's stupid, just dumb!"
To his surprise, you stood up. Well, being an entity like yourself, your time is strict. He's lucky enough he got to talk to you.
"Of course you would say that," you chided, meeting his gaze. The glowing crack on his body intensified in response. "And, yet, the Pines family defeated you using only their bond."
He doesn't reply.
"...I'm just saying that I miss Earth, my home. If I had known you actually had any chance of succeeding, I would have destroyed you already."
...
"Anyway, good talk. It was a pleasure to meet you," you remarked, bowing your head.
Bill quietly stared at your leaving human form. You are the ultimate disrespect Bill has ever encountered in his lifetime.
Right next to Stanley Pines.
BONUS:
The axolotl blinked at you. "Being kinder to Bill was an option. We're trying to better him, after all."
You shrugged. "Look, Gills, I don't know the future, but what I do know is that I haven't met a being like him in a long, long time."
Bill Cipher is a stupid pest who got his powers from his own mistakes. Now, he chases over nothing.
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if u dunno em, this is OG golb from adventure time! erm golb looking like a baby but feel free to change how u look like lol, we have imagination!!
just gonna outright say it,,, GOLB!reader used to be human! Just like Golbetty!!!
DEAREST WRITERS, IF YOU LIKE THE IDEA OF GOLB!READER, FEEL FREE TO MAKE YOUR OWN VERSION TOO!!! GIVE US FOOD PLS PLS AND TAG ME 👉👈
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iamthedukeofurl · 9 months
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One interesting thing that can happen in long running media is that the general cultural background can shift under the work, recontextualizing it as it is being written. I'm specifically thinking of the Order of the Stick, a Dungeons and Dragons themed webcomic that started in 2003 with the titular party of adventurers going through a dungeon.
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From left to right, we have Belkar Bitterleaf the halfling ranger, Vaarsuvius the Elf Wizard, Elan the Human Bard, Haley Starshine the Human Rogue, Durkon Thundershield the Dwarf Cleric, and Roy Greenhilt the Human Fighter. The comic takes place in a fantasy setting that knowingly runs off the rules of Dungeons and Dragons third edition. Characters talk about rolls and bonuses and intentionally take levels in various classes. At the start, the comic was a pretty basic gag comic about the D&D rules, basic fantasy/adventure tropes, ect.
In the 20 years the comic has been running, it has updated about 1300 times, not counting bonus strips exclusively made for the printed version, and several print (or PDF) only side and prequel stories. It has also dramatically grown from it's roots, the art has improved while keeping the same general aesthetic, and the gag-a-day comic has become a sweeping fantasy epic. The characters have grown beyond their initial bits (Belkar is a Murderhobo, Elan is stupid, Haley is greedy, ect), and it's genuinely up there as one of my favorite stories. But anyway, let's talk about Vaarsuvius. If you look at the above art, You'll notice that the characters tend to have three types of body shapes: Rectangles for Roy, Belkar, and Elan, feminine curves for Haley, and Robes for Vaarsuvius. This presentation is a pretty consistent signifier of gender and/or somebody wearing robes. Early on, part of Vaarsuvius's running gag became their ambiguous gender. At the time, it was a fairly common joke in fantasy to talk about how Elven men had androgynous or "Girly" appearances, so V was part of that. Instead of a singular pronoun, characters would generally just abbreviate Vaarsuvius's name as "V", and whenever the narrative would have naturally provided some indication of gender one way or another, V would resolve the situation without providing any such indication. For example, an early gag has the characters seeking out a set of modern style bathrooms in the dungeon. When they find them, V says that their "More Efficient elven biology" means they don't have to go yet, so they wait outside while the boys go into the Men's room and Haley waits in the inevitable long line at the women's. When Vaarsuvius reveals that they are married, they use the term "Spouse" to refer to their partner, when we see their children, the children are clearly adopted (V and their partner both have pale skin, their children have darker skin) and refer to Vaarsuvius as "Parent". Vaarsuvius themselves seems to have trouble identifying other people by gender. Characters outside the central cast might refer to Vaarsuvius as "He" or "She", but doing so was always shedding light on that character's perspective, rather than saying anything about Vaarsuvius. The assumption behind the gag is that Vaarsuvius must be either male or female, and the joke is that the narrative/Vaarsuvius themselves keeps finding ways to avoid "Revealing" their gender. Fan wikis and official books list Vaarsuvius's gender as "Ambigious" and on the forum there used to be a regular, multi-part thread dedicated to debatings Vaarsuvius's gender, even after the author declared that it would "never be revealed".
Anyway, going back to the start, it's 2023, and something shifted at some point, both in the comic and in the general cultural background. The jokes about V's gender kind of fell off, not just because the gag got played out, but because the basic assumption behind it simply doesn't work anymore. Everybody knows that Nonbinary people exist. There's no point in the comic where Vaarsuvius switches from being "Ambigiously Gendered" to Nonbinary, in fact, the entire comic reads just fine if you read Vaarsuvius as male or female and just not caring enough to clarify their gender to anybody and at some point other characters just stop thinking about it. But it's interesting to see how a character trait that was once included in even the most basic character descriptions (Varsuvius: Elven Wizard. Arrogant, Intelligent. Ambigiously gendered) just kind of got washed away by a rising tide of cultural nuance towards gender. Also go read OOTS, it's pretty great.
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menopause-diary · 5 months
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When Self-Care Meets Parenting: The Unseen Benefits of a Child-Free Getaway
Have you ever come back from a kid free vacation and been made to feel guilty you prioritized your relationship? Coming back from a fantastic 5-day escape to Puerto Rico, we were greeted not just by the usual post-vacation blues but by remarks about our choice to not include the kids. Here’s the thing: not every trip needs a kid’s menu. Taking a short break isn’t just a luxury; it’s essential.…
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