#but due to him WANTING to say it back but not being able to

[kyunzin]

𝐅𝐮𝐜𝐤 𝐦𝐞 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐝 𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲

✰ characters ✰ 𝐘. 𝐄𝐫𝐞𝐧

✰ summary ✰ don’t say things you don’t mean, unless you do mean them. in that case eren can fulfil all your requests (f!reader)

✰ tags/warnings ✰ nsfw, ex!eren, alcohol use, degradation, spanking, daddy kink, cum eating, squirting. praise kink, overstimulation, pussy licking

✰ kyun’s note ✰ it’s been long overdue, two long fics in a row is tough gang dont do this at home. also sorry for any spelling mistakes i am sleep derived

it was definitely a good idea to go out with the girls

it was probably a bad idea to not send eren home with all the drinks you had earlier clouding your judgment

it was absolutely going to hurt in the morning but that is the last thing that's on your mind right now it will be a problem for later

you and eren had gotten together in high school and stayed together for the duration of high school. the both of you being fairly well known though he was more popular than you were.

the both of you had different passions and wanted to peruse different careers. him wanting to play basketball professionally and you didn’t really want to have a boring 9-5 either so you chose to be an influencer.

you both supported each other and both of you became very successful in what you did. eren signing with a good team and you having nearly up to a million followers. you made sure to go to every one of his games and he would be sure to mention you on his socials and even point to you at games.

the two of you even had a child together who both of your fans adored. you had him early in both of your careers and had enough money to support him growing up, the two of you thought that you would be able to live the rest of your lives as a family.

that was until about 4 years later when eren’s schedule became to hectic and he spent more time practicing and being out of the country for games to even be home with you, there was a gradual build up to that which you thought you could get through but in the end you realised it was too much for you and he accepted that.

in the end the both of you decided to spilt apart as is was just too much on you. both of your fan bases were sad to see their favourite couple break apart but you assured them that it was mutual and the two of you ended on good terms, deep down you still loved him but you let him go knowing it was for the better.

eren always made sure to send money to support both him and you even though you told him that he didnt need to send you money as well. he also did regular calls to check in to see how the both of you were doing, and when he was back in the country he made sure to see you if he could spending time with his son and even you.

you know he loved his son from the way he would always get souvenirs from countries when he was out and even got some jerseys from his sons favourite players even if he did pout complaining because he wasn’t his favourite.

this went on for about a year and it worked really well for the three of you, your sons fifth birthday passed with eren doing his all to be there buying him an expensive gift that your son absolutely loved. eren had lately had been spending more time over due to the season, there not being a lot of games and you decided you wanted to go out since it had been a while.

eren has said he would take care of your son while you went out with your friends saying that you deserved the time to have fun. he took your son over to his house so that you could get ready in peace telling you he would keep him for the weekend so you could relax.

once the both of them had left the house you called both sasha and mikasa telling them the plans and they decided to come over to help you get ready. they arrived soon with their things and the three of you started to get ready.

you had your hair and make up done all that was left was your outfit. you had no idea what to wear as it had been a long time since you had gotten dressed up like this, the girls made their way to you closet and started picking through your stuff looking for something for you to wear.

being pregnant had made big changes to you body which left you feeling less than confident after your giving birth but as the years went by some changes left and some stayed. for one your tits and ass filled out as well as you hips getting wider giving you a near hourglass figure.

you were pretty self conscious about your body but everyone around you encouraged you to embrace your new body as they said it made you look sexy and you believed them, looking at yourself differently you loved your new self.

the girls had picked out a dress you don’t even remember buying. a long-sleeve red dress that stopped just under you ass with red cross slits trailing down the side exposing some skin. you paired it with a classic set of black heels and a red bag to match.

the other two were also ready when you had finished getting dressed so you made sure you had everything you needed and sasha drove you to the club blasting music all the way there.

you got into the flub with no problem all of you being over the required age and the three of you went to get drinks to start your night off, weaving your way through the bustling crowd and over to the bar where you all order your first round of drinks keeping you tab open just in case you want to get more.

you and mikasa take a few more shots sasha only having a few being your designated driver for the night not that she really needed any as she would be asked to have just as much fun either way. after you finished your drinks the three of you moved over into the dancing crowd losing yourselves to the music.

you swung your body to the beat of the music sasha in front and mikasa behind you, your as shaking with every sway of your hips. you could tell that many men wanted to join you but you could see both of the girls pushing the away as they know about your lingering feelings for eren.

the song changes and you recognise it as ‘mad at me by sexxy red’ realising that you know the lyrics and you start singing it along with the others in the room, knowing it lyric for lyric shaking your ass to the beat people around you dancing to the music.

when the next line come on you shout it out like there's no tomorrow “fuck me like you mad at me baby, I need a freak to drive me crazy!” and you sing the rest of the song with the same passion until it finishes and you’re out of breath.

the next song plays and you feel all the energy you had from before now depleted and decide to go pay for your last drink of the night leaving sasha and mikasa on the dance floor.

it didn’t take long for you to reach the bar and pay but on your way back to the girls some one stopped you trying to pull you for a dance. but you quickly pushed them away not in the mood walking to your friends even faster.

you get to the girls in record speed in no time though all the remaining energy you had no completed, the girls notice this and decide it’s time for you all to go home.

you drip mikasa home first knowing she has to go to bed for work in the morning. and then sahsa takes you back to your house with you dozing off on the way back. you didn’t even realise that you had faleen asleep until you felt sasha gently shake you awake.

thanking her for the ride home you wish her a safe journey back walking up to your front door, stumbling on the short walk due to the alcohol still flowing in your system. checking the time to see that it was almost past midnight and you know that your son should have gone to bed ages ago feeling bad that you couldn’t tell him goodnight.

when you walk in it takes a while for your eyes to adjust to the light which you were sure you turned off when you left, squinting only to see a figure sitting on the couch. you take off your heels setting them to the side and look up to see the figure still there.

once your eyes get accustomed to the light you realise that’s it’s eren sitting there who has been sitting there staring up at you since you walked in, and you think maybe you’re just hallucinating from the alcohol in your system but upon further inspection you realise that he’s actually there.

“eren? what are you doing here? where’s my baby?”

for a second he doesn’t say anything and just eyes you up but then he speaks up.

“c’mere here baby”

the space between you brows crease at the pet name but you move towards him nonetheless, coming to stand up in from of him looking down at him.

“I dropped him off at my mums place, don’t worry about him for now”

he gently pulls you down to straddle you making your dress ride up a little bit, leaving the two of you face to face. you don’t instantly question his actions but your face conveys your confusion, but instead of saying anything he just sits there rubbing slowly up and down your thighs spread over him.

“what’s going on, is something wrong?”

but instead of answering your question he laughs and pulls out his phone swiping though as if looking for something.

“how about you tell me what this is about first”

you’re confused at first but then once the video starts playing your eyes widen in shock. it’s a video of you in the club singing to “mad at me” shouting the lyrics to the song.

“wanna explain this to me”

he’s still smiling as he says it and you know there's no way to get out of this. there's no possible excuse he would believe after seeing that, which brings up the question of where he got it from.

“who took this video and how do you have it”

he turns off his phone slipping it back into his joggers the action causing you to shift in too of him, your hands coming to rest on his shoulders as to not fall off him.

“it was posted online and someone sent it to me, and don't try change the subject. what’s this about you wanting to fuck. if you wanted some dick all you had to do was say so princess. you know i never say no to you baby”

in truth it had been a while since you were active, though it was mainly because of your lack of time due to taking care of you son as well as working.

part of it had to do with the fact that no dock would be able to compare to eren's. the way he would fuck you was to good for you to ever try it with anyone else.

you had kind of missed this intimate part of your relationship, you knew eren wasn’t the type of guy to sleep around and you are sure if he did you would have found out by now and you didn’t want to seem to desperate by asking him about his life without you as you respected his privacy as he did yours.

“why you silent for pretty, aint got nothing to say or did you really mean what you said. what was it again, you wanted me to fuck you like I was mad at you cause I can do that baby if it’s what you want, do you want that?”

as you contemplate your answer you notice his hands don’t stop but smile drops a serious look falls over his face. he probably knows that your drunk and no os giving you a way out of this.

knowing him if you said no he would step back and act as if it didn’t happen. the thing is that you do want this to happen, maybe it’s the alcohol or the fact that you’re just really pent up and horny but you don’t see a reason to decline his offer.

you nod your head to agree but he doesn’t seem satisfied with that hands stopping to grip at your thighs squeezing them lightly.

“no princess, I need words. you say yes we continue. say no and I’ll take you to bed and go back home, answer me properly”

knowing this is your last chance to back out you appreciate his efforts in order to confirm your consent and it just gives you even more reason to say yes, knowing that he’s being respectful even though he couldn’t have done what he wanted knowing you have no way of defending yourself in this state.

“yes eren, I want this. I want you. fuck me please, i need you“

you hardly have time to register what’s happening before he’s lifting you up and making his way to your old shared bedroom. you wrap you legs around his firm torso and cling onto him tighter, even though you know that there no way he will drop you.

“only since you asked me so nicely, I’ll give you what you need don’t worry baby”

the two of you reach the bed room in record speed and eren gently sets you down on the edge of the bed kneeling down in front of you both of his hands still on the side of your thighs looking up at you with a mischievous grin.

his mouth latches onto you barely clothed sex sucking on your clit in a way that has you gasping out in ecstasy. it’s no lie to say that eren knows every inch of your body inside and out. he knows all the things that make you squirm and scream. where to touch and lick as well as h to e spots indie you that make your arch into his touch.

he moves on from sucking on your clit like a mad man thirsting for water and moves down to you dripping whole, sinking his tongue into your tight heat that hadn’t had any attention for a while. not that there weren’t a few visits from your bullet vibrator it just couldn’t make you cum the way you did when eren would fuck you.

“fuck, she really missed me didn’t she ma?”

the way he’s talking to your pussy has you rolling your eyes, but they then roll for a different reason as he adds one finger teasing his way inside of you alongside his hot tongue. “oh fuck, ‘ren don’t stop please” your hand reaches for his head gripping his hair causing it to fall loose as you pull his face further into your cunt.

both his tongue and fingers pistoling into you at a harsh pace so he not surprised when you end up cumming into his mouth as he starts to suck on your clit. he doesn’t stop scissoring his fingers inside you until you stop cumming and your moans die out, though your legs still tremble slightly due to the force of your orgasm.

“we aint done yet princess, you said you wanted to be fucked right and that’s what you’ll get. flip over”

you may be a bit drunk but that doesn’t stop you from turning over at the speed of light making you a bit lightheaded but you do regret it as you miss when eren pulls of his top and steps out his trousers and boxers, kneeling back behind you slapping his cock against your ass cheeks.

“you ready for me baby?”

he watches as you nod your head eagerly and lines his cock up with your pussy sliding in with predicted ease, filling out all the way to the hilt. both of you let out moans of pleasure “fuck- I missed you” you’re not sure if he’s talking to you or your pussy but you’re to full and stretched out to care. it would be an understatement to say that you also missed the fill of his cock. it was more like the longer you were apart the more you craved to feel him.

he was feeling sympathetic knowing that it had been a while since you had fuck him, or anyone for that matter, but when you start to rock back into him letting out small mewls of pleasure he decides not to hold back. “such a desperate whore, you cant wait to fuck yourself on my cock huh?” his words are accompanied by a hard slap to your ass causing your movements to stagger with a loud moan of “f-fuck, you’re taking too long”

he lets you move as you please for a few more moments before growing impatient and gripping your waist slamming his hips into yours. “d-daddy- fuckk!” you cant see it but you can hear the smirk as he says “you like it when daddy fucks you like this don’t you?” as he sends another harsh thrust you way, rocking the bed with the force of his thrust.

he continues with his timely thrust with the occasional slap to your ass, oscillating between that or squeezing it in both hands and playing with the fat. he can feel the way you clam down on him when he does that, knowing your body inside and out plays well in is favour, not so much in yours.

he spares no energy with is thrusts as he knows you like it when he's rough with you, fucking you into the soft sheets wit vigour, deep strokes hitting your cervix every time, the tip brushing against your sweet spot on every quick roll of his hips.

he's not surprised when he begins to hear your familiar slurred pleas of " daddy please. 's too much. slow down" to which he does the opposite and uses one and to steady your waist and the other one to hold your neck keeping your back arced "remember, you asked for this princess," your unable to move, sheets bunched up in your hands, hips held high by him, face pressed into the bed.

"made it loud and clear waat you wanted and now im giving it to you"

the slick sounds of sex circulate the room, your nonsensical moans bouncing off the walls in the room along with his skin slapping against yours as he hammers is cock into your dripping pussy. "since you asked for it m sure you can take it like a good girl cant you? noting you havent done before"

you can feel is cock start to pulse inside you and you know that he's close , and you're on the verge of release, with the way eren's pounding into you you doubt you'll be able to last much longer as well as the fact that its been ages since your last fuck, which was eren.

"next time you want something, just fucking ask"

the last three words of his sentence are each punctuated with a harsh trust, sending you over the edge as you begin to squirt all over is cock and onto the sheets below you. he can feel the way your pussy spasms around is cock as he fucks you through your orgasm, slowing down to ease you through it.

"that's it cum on daddy's cock, its all fucking yours baby, nobody can have me but you"

its only a couple more languid trusts until he's spilling is hot seed inside you with a groan of your name on his lips, hips stuttering as his grip tightens enough in a way you're sure will leave marks in the morning, body doubling over your trembling frame while he locks his hips with yours, emptying is tick load deep into your pussy.

only wen he's sure that there's no more does e finally pull out of your near limp body and gently rolls you over onto your back. peppering kisses down your torso till he settles between your legs were he begins to suck the cum out of you, causing your legs to clam around is head.

"nononono- fuck. i cant, s too much no more."

he's relentless not stopping even as your and tug at his air, pushing is tongue deep into your pussy and licking your mixed juices out of you. "just one more baby, i know you can give it to me" he's not wrong as only a second after he presses his thumb to your clit, you're cumming for the third time that evening shaking in is hold.

after tat e makes sure to clean you out as best as he can, dressing you into comfortable clothes. after cleaning himself he carries you to the guest bedroom and tucks you in deciding to leave until you reach out to him pulling him back.

he ends up wit is arms wrapped around you and your head tucked underneath is, drifting into a deep sleep. you're sure that in the morning the two of you will have a lot of things to talk about.

𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 - 𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐈𝐓𝐀𝐍

[tojiscursedtool]

Requesting headcanons for Jujutsu High Teacher Male!Reader being in a "Colleagues With Benefits" relationship with hung!Gojo.

R doesn't like Gojo (but Gojo's friendly with him), but he loves sucking on Gojo's big fat cock, and Gojo loves how well R can handle it with such skill & ease.

🏮| ° .• Satoru H/Cs . ‹𝟹 ` ֶָ֢

Note ~ thank you so much for the request I really hope this is to your liking, thank you for explaining the details in DMS too!!（╹◡╹）♡.. I’m really sorry though if you do not like this or if it’s not to your liking!

MENTIONS — Male!Reader, Teasing, Face Fucking, Blowjobs/Handjobs in public, harsh/aggressive face fucking, praising from gojo, spit/saliva, photo/video taking while sucking him off, making out as you stroke him off.

-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-

— Hung!Gojo who would force you to completely take his cock down your throat with a tight ass grip on your hair just to feel your warm hot mouth around his cock.

— Hung!Gojo who knows you don’t like him but proceeds to tell you how much he likes you and how cute you look when you suck his massively big cock.

“You’re so cute when you’re like this..so pretty f’me. So perfect.” He’d probably say corny shit too but he really does mean it, he finds you so cute and pretty even when you give him that mean glare when sucking his dick. He knows you like it when he fucks the back of your throat, it’s feel good to you but you’d never admit that to HIM.

— Hung!Gojo who praises you for any little thing you do while sucking his cock, especially wrapping your long tongue around his shaft, he’s never really had anyone who could really suck his dick properly. They’d complain saying ‘it’s too big’ or that ‘I can’t take it!!’ But you were a different story, you could take his cock in your throat with ease.

“F—fuck. Good boy..keep goin’. Doin’ so well f’me..such a perfect hole to fuck.” He grunted out as he pushed your head down onto his cock, you looked up at his messed up face with that cold neutral stare you gave him everyday. You liked getting those reactions out of him though, especially when you used your long tongue to lick and swirl all around his shaft he couldn’t help but slam his hips pounding his cock into your mouth.

— Hung!Gojo who loves how skilled you are when taking his huge cock, even when he’s rough with you. You take it like a fuckin’ champ and he loves every minute with you, especially when you’re able to swallow all of his cum. Gojo knows that when he comes it’s a lot more than the average person and his cocky ass is obviously going to be proud of that.

— Hung!Gojo who whimpers and whines when you tease his cock by kissing the tip and purposely avoiding eye contact with him. He hates when you tease him he loves when you completely take him in your mouth. you know how much he loves eye contact and it drives him crazy. You dislike him so much but yet you use your mouth to please him..sometimes you wanted to be mean and make him beg until he couldn’t take it anymore:

“P—please. Baby..ah. Stop teasin’..ya’know how much I hate it..please?” He begged in a whining tone leaning towards you a little trying to look you in the eye to keep eye contact but you purposely avoided his gaze. Your hands barely stroking him just lightly rubbing it, you could feel his cock twitch and throb in your hand. You continued to barely suck his big cock, just kissing and licking the tip.. he was little our little whimpers you didn’t even know a man like him could make. You didn’t take him for the pathetic type but here he was..begging and whining like a little bitch. You smirked slightly as Gojo cupped the sides of your face with his shaky hands, his breath was hitched and shaky as well. He needed you so bad and he would pretty much do anything just for you to please and take him in your mouth, after all you were the only one who was able to take him.

— Hung!Gojo who sometimes stayed the whole day being pent up due to your teasing, you’d only kiss and lick on the tip of his huge cock and stop completely leaving him there to take care of himself. You were so mean to him. He kinda digged it though because that meant later on he could be rough and punish you..

— Hung!Gojo who waits for the day to be over with so he can absolutely fucking destroy you. He’s been bothered all day with the teasing you did to him and you know damn well what you did. He’d wait till you’re alone until he drags you with him and puts you in his domain. Before you could even get a word in next thing you knew his dick was in your mouth and he was shoving it down your throat making you take it.

You were shocked by the sudden way he just overlapped his domain keeping you there, making you suck his cock. He liked you so he wasn’t going to be so rough with you but he was still kind of mad, you were petty so he wanna gonna give you that same attitude back. Kind of..his hips moved back and forth harshly and quickly making sure the tip of his huge ass dick hit the back of your throat causing you to gag a little while sucking his cock. You felt every vein throb in your mouth as he coated your throat with his pre-cum. He wasn’t even close to coming yet..he wanted to ruin you..or at least try to. His dick was so big that there would be a bulge in your throat each time he moved his hips forward to make his cock sink more into your mouth. He had a smug look on his face as he used both hands to hold the back of your head slamming it onto his cock. “Your tongue, start using it.” You hesitated but did what he asked, you used your tongue to swirl around his thick cock as you kept looking at him in his bright blue glowing eyes. Your gagging and slurping noises echoed through out of the domain and you swore you heard his voice whispering in your ear even though he was standing in front of you making you suck his cock. Your body felt more sensitive and you could feel yourself growing hard from him? From Gojo? No way. That must’ve been a delusion but it really was true, your face didn’t really change it was still the same from earlier, not much expression just a neutral stare but what was different was the slight blush on your cheeks. Not because you liked him, no, you hated him but you were embarrassed he was able to catch you like this..you were going to unbutton your pants and deal with yourself in front of him but the sole of his shoe laid on your bulge pressing on it as he slightly rubbed it with his foot. “Ah ah..keep sucking my dick baby. You focus on me and only me..understand?” He patted the back of your head before you could nod or try to agree he came in your mouth, it was more than usual. It was so much but you were able to handle it, of course you were. You were perfect for this and so skilled at it..his whole body shuddered as he let his load out inside your mouth filling up your throat..after he was done with his orgasm he pulled out making you open your mouth to make sure you swallowed it all and like always..you did. “Good. Don’t let that happened again or else it’ll be your ass I’ll fuck the shit out of.” He said staring at you smiling as his domain was now off.

— Hung!Gojo who knows you love sucking on his big cock no matter the day or time it is. It could be all alone in the classroom, full of a bathroom with people trying to be quiet, in the dorms, in the meeting room all alone, in his car, anywhere. He’d give you it anytime of the day too, as long as you ask.

— Hung!Gojo who loves to hold your hands as he watches you suck his dick with no hands to help you, the he’s impressed with how you suck his big cock with your cute warm wet mouth. He’d even coo at you and tell you how good you’re doing.

— Hung!Gojo who goes on a rant about how perfect your dick sucking skills are, how you do better than any woman or man who’s ever tried to ever suck his cock, he’d even spoil you with lavish gifts and buys you whatever you wanted. Even if you didn’t ask he knew, he knew you so well. You may have hated him but he loved you and your perfect skill to be able to take his fat cock down that throat of yours.

— Hung!Gojo who would probably ask you to suck his dick in the middle of a mission or have you stroke him off during a meeting.

— Hung!Gojo who would constantly repeats how much he loves you and how he adored you more than anyone while sucking his dick. He didn’t care if you didn’t care he just wanted you to know how much he loves you..so much.

— Hung!Gojo who would sometimes lay back and let you do all the work when you insist to..you want to do your own thing here and there and go at your own pace. By ‘your own pace’ you mean absolutely breaking him. You’re able to make your throat squeeze down on him and make it feel like his own personal little glory hole when in reality it’s your throat making him feel good.

— Hung!Gojo who loves when you stroke him off before sucking his large cock, he loves the feeling of your cold hands touching and squeezing around his cock, he loved the way you’d sometimes sit on his lap and making out with him keeping eye contact as you rub and stroke his cock. The small moans he let out during the kiss turned you on sometimes if you were feeling nice enough you’d let him thigh fuck you for only 5 minutes.

— Hung!Gojo who’s cock is 7 inches long when soft and around 11 inches when hard with a bit of a pale pink flushed tip. How he would always produce pre-cum when you kissed and sucked the sides of the shaft of his cock. He enjoyed when you licked and cleaned the pre-cum off of his cock.

— Hung!Gojo taking videos or photos of you while you went at it and sucked his cock, praising you, leaving sweet comments, commenting on how well your dick sucking skills are, how you swallowed up his cum like your own special little beverage. He’d even ask to recreate some videos or photos if he enjoyed them that much.

— Hung!Gojo who spits in your mouth and makes you use his saliva to make his cock slide in your mouth with more ease. Not like it was hard for you anything..he just found it hot how you would do so.

— Hung!Gojo who loves the way you look at him when you suck his dick, your expression is usually cold with him but it softens when you’re sucking his dick. He finds it absolutely adorable and doesn’t comment on it, he doesn’t want you to hide this little side to you. He loves it too much. Although it doesn’t change THAT much it still looks cute and he’s into it. He’s into you. He loves you.

— Hung!Gojo who’s dick is is too big to to only use one hand while jerking him off, you’d have to use both hands AND your mouth if you wanted to please him right.

— Hung!Gojo who sends you pictures of his bulge/dick completely out while you’re doing your job, at home, or just anywhere.

— Hung!Gojo who loved to fill up your mouth with his warm cum, how you’d whisper a thank you or tell him to give you more, sometimes he’d make you beg or ask him but you didn’t really care..you just wanted his ridiculously huge cock.

-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-

[manheeiim]

revenge - rafe cameron

summary: someone hurts you and rafe gets revenge || warnings: y/n is hit and pushed, alcohol, rafe throws the glass, rafe kills someone but there are no details|| genre: established relationship, angst || word count: approximately 1120

I said goodbye to my friends, still crying after what had happened only 15 minutes ago. My friends asked if I needed them to come inside with me and hang out with me for a bit but I declined their offer, saying that I'd be fine.

I walked towards the front door of Tannyhill, and my friends car drove off, I knew they were all worried due to my condition.

I tried to calm donw a little as I unlocked and opened the front door and was met with a mostly dark home. I made my way over to the kitchen, where I could see that the kitchen light was on, going to see if my boyfriend was in there.

I was seriously nervous for his reaction but all I wanted was him.

I walked into the kitchen and I looked over at Rafe, who was sat at the island, scrolling on his phone as he drank some liquor from a fancy glass cup. He looked over at me and immediately furrowed his eyebrows.

"What the fuck happened to you, Y/n?" Rafe sternly asked he slammed the glass down on the counter, causing me to flinch. He came over to me and brought his hands to my face, holding onto it a little too roughly. "Who did this?" He asked.

"I don't know." I cried out, as he moved his hands from my face to my arms.

"Tell me what happened." Rafe instructed, his jaw clenching at my state, wanting to know who did this so he could kill them, and with Rafe, he wasn't exaggerating when it came to thinking that. He'd really kill them.

"I... I was at the party. Everything was going good." I shakily said.

Rafe nodded, giving me a soft, "Uh-huh.", just wanting to get to what happened to you.

"I got a drink for myself and turned around and accidentally bumped into a girl a splashed some of my drink on her." Rafe nodded, listening to me, still holding onto my arms. "She got really made even though I apologized right away and started talking all this shit." I explained. "I don't know, next thing I knew she slapped me in the face." I told Rafe and I felt his grip on my arms tighten a little.

"What'd you do? You better have hit her back." Rafe said in a serious tone.

"I- I didn't. I really didn't want to fight so I just pushed her away from me and went to walk away. Then her boyfriend came over.." I said and that's when I really felt Rafe's grip on me tighten, holding the grip. It hurt, especially due to the condition I was in. I didn't bother to say anything though, I could already tell that Rafe was fuming.

"I- her boyfriend came over and started yelling at me for pushing his girl, even though she started everything and slapped me first. I only pushed her away to get away from her. He didn't care though and so he came over, slapped me in the face, and pushed me to the ground. It was concrete so... that's why I'm all cut up." I told Rafe.

Rafe let go of me, I watched him tighten his fists into a ball as his jaw clenched. "Show me the damn cuts." H told me, already being able to see some of them but he wanted to see all of them.

I stepped back and showed him the cuts on my hands, arms, and legs from catching myself when I fell onto the ground.

"The one fucking time I'm not your damn ride to the party, this shit happens." Rafe angrily murmurs to himself, looking down, taking deep breaths as he paced around.

I watched him, standing to the side now. He huffed to himself and I could see that his mind was racing. Rafe then grabbed the cup with the liquor and threw it against the wall, causing it to shatter everywhere.

"I'm going to kill that motherfucker." Rafe angrily told me as he came over to me. "What'd he look like, huh? Tell me." He said.

"Rafe.." I softly said, scared of what my boyfriend would do.

Rafe gave me a look, "Don't, Y/n." He said. "Tell me what the fuck he looked like." He then told me.

"I- he had wavy brown hair and uh, he was wearing a Hawaiian shirt and these sunglasses." I said, trying to give the best description possible.

"Alright, alright. Yeah, okay." Rafe softly said, more to himself as he paced around again. He then down at me, stopping in front of me. "Don't go anywhere. I'm going to deal with this asshole." He then said in a low voice and I knew when he said that, he meant more than him just beating the guy up.

"Rafe.." I softly said again.

"Shut up, Y/n!" Rafe yelled, causing me to flinch. "He thinks he can touch you like that. No fucking way. Stay here, I'll be back." My boyfriend then harshly told me. "I love you." He then said, leaning down and giving me a quick and harsh kiss before walking past me, grabbing his keys off the counter aggressively as he stormed out of the house.

I cleaned up the broken cup Rafe had thrown while just crying to myself about everything. When I finished, I went upstairs, showered, wincing at the feeling of the soap on some of my cuts, before getting into a nightgown and getting into bed.

I lie there for about an hour, completely lost in thought and worry, before the bedroom door opened. I sat up and saw Rafe coming inside, the room was dark so I couldn't really see anything but his figure. I turned the lamp on my nightstand on, looking at Rafe as he let out a sigh, taking his shirt off. I saw some bruises on his body as well, probably from the guy who'd pushed me.

I watched as he got in his pajamas before getting bed with me. I got closer to him in bed and turned the light off. He turned to face me, putting his arm over my torso.

"I took care of him, you won't have to worry about him anymore." Rafe lowly said.

I didn't know what to say. So, he really killed the guy. I suddenly felt really tense, my heart racing at the thought.

"I love you." My boyfriend told me.

"I love you too." I said back and I meant that, even if it was wrong, especially after what he'd done. He'd done what he did for me. To protect me. So, yes, I loved him. I always would.

-- link to my masterlist

[bosbas]

Chapter 9: I cannot be your friend, so I pay the price of what I lost

series masterlist previous part || next part

pairing: colin bridgerton x enemy!fem!reader WC: 4.0k words

Warnings: period-typical gender roles, small part of the dialogue in French, colin being incredibly down bad it's insane, Penelope DOES NOT have feelings for colin in this, the bridgertons being tapped in as fuck

Summary: It took precisely two days in England for you to utterly despise Colin Bridgerton. It took him approximately twelve hours after that to hate you right back. But he doesn't care that you're the only person in the ton who doesn't like him. You're set to marry someone else anyway, right?

A/N: this one wrote itself basically. so enjoy! happy weekend and a big smooch

June 6 – It seems that one Mr. Nigel Berbrooke has returned after an extended unexplained absence. He was spotted at the gentleman's club last night, though only for a very short time. This author heard that Mr. Berbrooke was asked to leave only an hour into his appearance due to a particularly aggressive threat he made toward Simon Basset. It’s safe to say that he has been uninvited from the Duke’s ball this evening, and perhaps from the rest of the social season’s events as well, depending on how lenient the Duke and Duchess of Hastings decide to be. 

However, information regarding his whereabouts for the past month is scarce, and this author lacks any reputable sources about what the man has been up to while away from London. But rest assured, dear readers, that any information I receive will be relayed through this very column.

Colin looked nervously at his reflection for what seemed like the hundredth time, adjusting his cravat ever so slightly. He sighed in frustration, accepting the fact that his appearance wouldn’t look quite right no matter what he did. 

Tonight was Daphne’s ball, and he knew for a fact that you would be in attendance. As much as he was trying to convince himself that this ball was no different, he knew it wasn’t going to be the same. Not after his talk with Anthony. There were some concerningly similar aspects between Kate and Anthony and his friendship– could he even call it a friendship? –with you, and Colin was not too hard-headed to be able to admit that. 

But he didn’t want to scare you off. As much as he liked you, he knew you were skittish after everything that happened with Lord Barlow. Besides, Colin didn’t even know if you liked him, too, or if you considered all of this as just an attempt to make you look desirable to other candidates. 

Frankly, Colin wasn’t even sure he could convince you to ever marry him. Maybe just being friends, or whatever it was the two of you had now, would suffice. Truthfully, he would take anything. 

Tonight, he just wanted a dance. And perhaps a chat, too. 

Based on the past few times Colin had spoken with you, he had concluded that you might be his favorite person in the ton to talk to. The mere thought of speaking with you tonight stirred excitement in his stomach. Every time you engaged in conversation, he found himself utterly captivated, forgetting everything else around him. What's more, you seemed genuinely interested in his what he had to say, a rarity among the ton. For the first time, he felt truly understood, and he hoped desperately that you reciprocated his sentiment. 

“You look fine,” assured Eloise. “Now can we please go? We’ll never hear the end of it from Daphne if we’re late!” 

Colin grumbled in annoyance but begrudgingly made his way to the carriage. In truth, he'd do just about anything to be near you. Even if he didn’t immediately dance with you– knowing full well you would be flocked by hordes of gentlemen wanting your hand in marriage– he still liked to simply… observe you. How your eyes crinkled shut when you laughed, the way you nervously bit your lip when someone you didn’t particularly like asked you to dance, the way you fiddled with your gloves when you were itching to get out of a conversation.

Bloody hell, Colin thought, maybe he did have feelings for you. Well, not love, that would be absurd. But certainly something more than the petty rivalry that had consumed your interactions for weeks on end. It was a sobering realization, especially after relentlessly antagonizing you for the better part of seven weeks.

He was so caught up in his thoughts about you that Colin barely noticed once the carriage had arrived at Daphne and Simon’s residence.

“Colin, darling, is anything the matter?” his mother inquired, tapping him on the arm and gently leading him toward his sister’s home.

“No, no, sorry. Everything’s alright, just got a bit distracted there,” he smiled back. 

Christ, he had to get a grip. You’d be put off immediately if you saw how he was acting now. He smoothed his coat down as he entered the ballroom, eyes immediately searching for you in the crowd.

He quickly spotted you speaking to a man he’d never seen before with Isabelle and Carlos by your side. Damn, thought. He’d have to wait to ask you to dance. 

But it was no bother. In the meantime, he attended to his duties as the most beloved Bridgerton. He sought out his sister and Simon to thank them for hosting the ball, of course, and danced with Penelope Featherington. 

Yet his focus stayed on you. He found himself glancing over to where you were every few minutes, just needing reassurance that you were still there. And also because he quite liked looking at you in general.  

Colin shook his head, bringing his attention back to Penelope. He had to remind himself to pull himself together. Even though Colin had spoken to Anthony, you had no reason to believe anything was different between you two. And it wasn’t. Everything was the same. It was only Colin who had changed. Who wanted something different, something more. 

“What’s on your mind?” asked Penelope after she noticed Colin’s drifting attention.

“Ah, nothing,” he responded dismissively. “Does Lady Montclair look particularly… subdued tonight, do you think?”

“Y/N?” Penelope clarified, looking over at where you were standing next to Louis. 

“Oh heavens, don’t look now!” Colin whispered, panicked. “She’ll see us both looking and know we were talking about her.”

Penelope laughed in disbelief. “Could it be? That my dear friend Colin Bridgerton is finally falling for someone? Have you truly found roots in England? Is that why you’ve stayed for so long this season?”

Colin could only smile bashfully. She had never seen him quite like this. And though it was unusual, it was fairly endearing to see him so flustered over a girl.

“Well, go talk to her, then. What are you doing dancing with me?”

“Penelope, I dance with you at every ball. I can go speak with her after. And don’t tell anyone! I’m not even sure if she likes me.”

“Very well then,” relented Penelope, but Colin did not miss the knowing smile she sent him.

After the dance concluded, Colin chatted with his brothers for a few minutes before making his way over to you and Louis, wanting to avoid seeming overly eager. But once he started walking toward you, your head shot up, as if you could tell that he was getting nearer. 

Your eyes met for a split second, but you immediately turned your head away, choosing instead to look at your gloved hands, which were fidgeting nervously. Colin frowned in confusion at your reaction, but continued walking, thinking that perhaps you had seen someone else behind him. 

As he reached your side, he saw you chewing anxiously on your lip and his frown deepened. But he pushed through. This was what he wanted, after all. You were what he wanted. 

“Lady Montclair,” he bowed. “Would you care for a dance tonight?” he asked, a hopeful smile on his lips as he reached for the dance card on your wrist.

But you pulled your hand away abruptly, refusing to meet his eyes. “No, thank you, Mr. Bridgerton,” was your curt response. 

Colin’s confusion morphed into frustration. What was the matter with you?

“That’s alright, I understand if you want to save space on your dance card for more…serious suitors,” he cringed as he heard himself speak. But at the end of the day, he was well aware that you were looking for a titled gentleman to be your husband. “We could take a turn about the ballroom and chat for a bit,” he offered, looking at you hopefully once again.

You finally met his eyes, and he could tell you were searching for something as you looked at him, a pained look on your face.

“No, thank you,” you repeated firmly, an edge to your voice. 

Colin rolled his eyes. This was so typical of you. You let him in for about three seconds and then went back to keeping him at arm’s length for whatever unknown reason.

“Are we really back to doing this?” asked Colin, exasperated. “I thought we were friends, at the very least.”

Your spine was suddenly rigid, and a fury ignited in your eyes. “We were never friends, Mr. Bridgerton,” you ground out. “You were simply doing Eloise a favor. Now, if you’ll excuse me, there’s someone else I must dance with.”

Your voice was cold and uncaring, and Colin was slapped with a reminder of how things used to be as you sidestepped him to go toward the other side of the ballroom. 

Three steps into your journey, it was clear that there wasn’t actually anyone waiting to dance with you, but he couldn’t for the life of him figure out why you were so desperate to get away. Even at the peak of your hatred toward him, you were always open to verbally sparring. 

Colin turned around to Louis, shooting him a questioning look. But your brother could only shrug. Who knew what went on in the depths of your brain? Louis had noticed you had been slightly on edge ever since you returned from Hyde Park with your sisters yesterday afternoon, but he wasn’t expecting you to be this hostile, especially after getting along so well with Colin.

Feeling his desire to speak with you outweigh his pride, Colin turned back and grabbed your hand, turning you to face him. “If what you want is to go back to arguing, I’m happy to do that,” he said, heart sinking to his stomach at the thought of going back to how things were.

He sounded positively pathetic. But he didn’t care. All he cared about was keeping this fragile dynamic alive, keeping you near him. If Anthony and Kate could do it, couldn’t the two of you?

You seemed on the brink of tears, but your voice held an unspeakable fury. “What I want is for you to leave. Me. Alone,” you emphasized each word with a pointed jab at his chest. “Please,” you whispered, your voice faltering. “I do not wish to dance with you, or to chat with you, or even to be near you at all. Good night.”

With that, you pivoted away, heading towards the refreshment table, tears welling in your eyes. And Colin was left standing there, hand lingering over the spot on his chest you had prodded.

He felt a familiar anger rising through him. It didn’t matter that you were the only person in the world who understood him. It didn’t matter that you were completely beautiful and incredibly smart, either. And it certainly didn’t matter that he’d fallen for you. Because you still hated him. And he was a fool to ever think things could be different.

Colin was rooted to the spot, unable to move as he watched you smile and greet some gentleman or other. He flinched as he saw the man kiss the back of your hand, and watched, seething, as he led you to the dance floor. 

Deciding he needed something stronger than lemonade, Colin turned around and grabbed a glass of champagne, downing it in one go. He couldn’t believe you didn’t think he was your friend. What the hell else could you call it?

He spotted Eloise and Penelope chatting close by and stomped over to them. He was sure he looked like Gregory after a fight with Hyacinth, pouting with his arms crossed, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. 

“I thought you were going to talk to Y/N,” said Penelope, confused to see him back so soon. 

Colin shot her a murderous look. “She wants nothing to do with me, apparently. She said the only reason I talked to her was out of a favor to Eloise.”

Eloise coughed awkwardly. “Well, didn’t you?”

“No!” shot back Colin defensively. “Not entirely, at least. I don’t know. I need to leave.” 

You were still dancing with the unnamed man, and Colin was very much still seething as he watched the pair of you twirl around and smile at one another. 

Usually, it was frustrating to watch you dance with other people because you were never like that with him. But this well and truly hurt. It hurt to see you like this when he knew, now for a fact, that he could never have that with you again. 

“I need to leave,” he repeated. He couldn’t bear to watch you do this all night.

Snatching another glass of champagne and downing that one, too, he bid his goodbyes to Penelope and Eloise and made his way across the ballroom to the exit.

“Are you leaving already, darling? You’ve barely been here an hour,” Colin heard next to him as a hand reached out for his elbow. 

Turning around, he faced his mother, who looked like she was in the middle of a conversation with Anthony and Benedict. 

Colin nodded. “I’m sorry, mother. I just can’t. I can’t stay,” he responded, voice breaking as he glanced back toward you again. 

Seeing you lean to whisper something in your suitor’s ear, he slumped forward, practically feeling physical pain at the sight. 

“I must go,” Colin said firmly, giving his mother a quick squeeze and rushing to the door. 

Violet nodded, bewildered, and followed where Colin’s gaze had been. Finding you dancing with Lord Norcliffe, Violet sent a knowing look to Benedict and Anthony. 

“I suppose Hyacinth was right,” she said sympathetically.

“And don’t you dare tell her! It’ll get to her head,” responded Benedict. 

---

“The Bridgertons will be in attendance tonight,” your mother informed you carefully as you sat in the carriage on the way to yet another ball. 

“And by the Bridgertons you mean…”

“She means Colin, yes,” answered Jacques, earning a stifled laugh from his wife, Chiara. 

Ever since they’d been back and learned of your intense hatred for Colin, Jacques had not been able to stop making a mockery of it. Usually, you were quite agreeable, and it was rare that you found yourself at odds with someone who wasn’t your sibling, so this seemingly unprompted hatred was quite amusing to your brother. 

You groaned and glared at him. “No one asked you to come tonight, you know. In fact, no one asked you to come to England at all! You could have stayed in Tuscany, and I would have been much happier.”

“Ah, but then I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to tease you about this,” answered Jacques, completely unbothered by your biting tone. 

“Whatever,” you grumbled in response, only slightly comforted by Chiara’s apologetic smile as she softly scolded her husband.

It had been four days since your run-in with Nigel, and three since you saw Colin at Daphne’s ball, and the thought of seeing him again made you feel sick. It was already bad enough that he was disgusting and had no respect for you, but it was made infinitely worse by the fact that you had let yourself grow to care for him. In a friendly way, of course. You could never have married him, anyway. But it was still embarrassing that you fell into his charming trap and thought that you could become something more than a conquest for him.

“Be nice,” your mother whispered in warning as you approached the Bridgertons. 

You shrugged her off, not needing a reminder. You had been brought up to be the perfect lady. You weren’t about to forget yourself now. You refused to give Colin that power. 

You greeted the family warmly until you got to Colin. “Mr. Bridgerton,” you said, giving him a curt nod.

Not waiting for a response, you moved to stand away from him as you looked out at the crowd. Perhaps you would find a gentleman who was actually enjoyable to talk to, though your chances seemed slim. 

Colin shifted uncomfortably on his feet, watching you intently. It seemed that your behavior at Daphne’s ball hadn’t been a fluke, after all. He ground his teeth in annoyance, growing increasingly irritated by the fact that you were just standing there.

Why weren’t you doing anything? It was infuriating. Perhaps it would have been less infuriating if it were anyone else, but it seemed like anything you did was particularly vexing to him.

Making his way over to you, he stopped beside you. Wanting to slip back into the comfort of your tumultuous dynamic, Colin took a shot at your attire. “I see the modiste-”

“Don’t,” you interrupted, your voice shaking, barely above a whisper, and your gaze locked ahead of you. 

Colin was taken aback. You had never, in all the time that he had known you, backed down from an argument. It seemed that you just… didn’t want him around at all. You hated him enough that you didn’t want to be near him. And in any way that mattered, it was worse than when you were antagonizing him.

“I’m sorry,” Colin said desperately. “I didn’t mean- Look, can we please talk? Just quickly, I just want-”

But you didn’t even let him finish. “There’s nothing to say.”

Colin scoffed, a futile attempt to hide how hurt he was really feeling. “What do you mean there isn’t anything to say? I have things to say, at least. Just talk to me.”

You finally turned to face him, feeling your stomach drop as you looked at his desperate eyes searching yours for an answer. 

“Let me rephrase. I do not wish to speak with you, in any capacity, now or any time in the future. I do not care to hear what you have to say, Mr. Bridgerton, and I would appreciate it if you could respect that, though I know that’s not usually in your nature.”

Colin could only sputter, staring at you in disbelief as you walked away. He felt his stomach turn uncomfortably as you reached a man he didn’t know, but whom you’d danced with at Daphne’s Ball. 

He had to have done something wrong. Colin hadn’t the slightest clue what, but you obviously had something against him, and it clearly wasn’t just you being silly. 

He swore under his breath. You were impossible. Not even Eloise knew why you hated him! How on earth was he supposed to know how to fix this when you refused to speak with him? It was almost easier when all you did was hurl insults at him and step on his feet as he poured lemonade down your dress.

Over on the dance floor, you couldn’t help but steal glances at Colin, mentally scolding yourself every time you did. This was not how you were supposed to be acting toward the man who had jumped at the first opportunity to compromise you.

The only reason you were dancing with Lord Norcliffe now was because he had not arrived in London until after your whole debacle with Lord Barlow. You supposed he could have heard what happened from someone else, but he was safer than the rest of the men of the ton, you thought grimly. It would’ve helped if he was interesting to talk to, or even nice to look at, but you supposed you couldn’t be very selective.

Curtsying and thanking Lord Norcliffe for the dance, you made a beeline toward Carlos and Philippe across the room. 

“You look like you don’t want to be here,” commented your brother, amused. 

You rolled your eyes at him. “Astute observation, Philippe.”

Carlos laughed and gave you a comforting pat on the head. “But what happened to your season in England? I thought you were excited to be here?”

“My mother and father were certainly excited,” you mused, taking Philippe’s lemonade and drinking from it. 

Seeing their confused looks, you briefly explained your encounter with Nigel Berbrooke, and they suddenly became very concerned. 

“Ce connard! Il est où? Je vai le tuer,” growled Philippe under his breath, not wanting the rest of the ton to hear his threat (That asshole! Where is he? I’m going to kill him).

“Philippe, it’s alright,” you assured him, glancing over at Carlos and seeing that he, too, had understood your brother’s words despite not speaking French. “I believe Simon Basset took care of him at White’s a few days ago.”

“That’s just as well, or I’d have done it myself,” he grumbled, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“You can just come to Spain next year, cariño,” Carlos said warmly.

You smiled up at your brother-in-law, silently thanking him for the offer even though you knew your parents would never allow it. 

Colin watched enviously as you had a conversation with your older brother and your older sister’s husband. He wished he could talk to you again. Even if nothing got resolved between you, he liked to hear your voice. He loved how stubborn you were and how frustrated you got when you forgot the English word for something. He just missed you, he supposed. 

Which is why, as Colin watched yet another man approach you and write their name on your dance card, he decided he couldn’t do this anymore. The watching, the waiting, the wanting. He couldn’t do any of it anymore. 

“I need to leave,” he said firmly.

Daphne, who had been standing beside him, turned to face him, startled. “Leave where?”

“India, Egypt, Morocco, back to Greece. I don’t care. I just need to get out of here.”

“What? Why?” asked Daphne, still confused. 

“You know why,” Colin responded flatly, giving her an unimpressed look. 

Daphne instinctively turned to look at you, laughing as the man you were dancing with whispered something to you. She turned to look back at her brother with a disappointed look.

“I can’t imagine leaving would be the best option.” 

“Why not?” Colin shot back. “What good can my presence possibly do?”

Daphne put a hand on her brother’s elbow, giving him a sympathetic look. However, her voice was firm. “You always leave when it gets hard, you know? You’re always the first out the door and onto a different continent. Why are you so scared of staying?”

Colin was stunned. He didn’t know his motives were that obvious. But he supposed it made sense for Daphne to know since she knew him better than most people.  

“I’m not scared of staying,” Colin insisted defensively. “I just think it’ll be better for everyone if I go.”

Daphne furrowed her eyebrows and shook her head. “And do what? What could you possibly be doing that is so important that you would abandon the woman you love?”

“It doesn’t matter,” Colin argued, his voice growing strained as he felt his chest getting tighter. “None of it matters. She doesn’t love me back. I could be down the street or in Brazil and she wouldn’t even notice. She clearly hates me and wants nothing to do with me, so why should I stay?”

Daphne crossed her arms, looking more than a little disappointed. “Well, I won’t be the one to stop you if you decide to go. But really think about whether you want to be the person who leaves time and again. Things could change. It's only been a few days since she's been like this.”

She had a point, but Colin was too upset to admit it. Daphne was right. He couldn’t just leave now. If anything, it would hurt him more than being near you with you not speaking to him. It was the strangest feeling, knowing you loved someone but feeling powerless to do anything about it. 

Colin knew he couldn’t continue like this. Perhaps he couldn’t leave, but he could certainly stay as far away as possible. 

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[iocity]

ASL ‘Merica AU where Ace constantly beats himself up about not being able to live with his brothers during the semester. As rough and tough as he would like to appear, he calls them every day, RELIGIOUSLY, and sometimes multiple times a day (Luffy misses him so he doesn’t mind at all, hell sometimes Luffy calls Ace back to back just to yap. Sabo finds it endearing how much Ace cares, but he will NEVER admit it due to their ongoing older brother rivalry and also his pride). He is such a big softie, and everyone who knows him knows all about his brothers (he carries ALL of their school/his fav pics in his wallet or bag. I mean from THE WEEK that they met. His self-introduction isn’t complete without showing at least one pic of him and his brothers). One night he calls them at like 3am, absolutely out his damn mind WASTED (Luffy and Sabo are laughing their asses off, bc Ace is an EMOTIONAL drunk), just to rant about how much he values their presence and feels like he needs to be there for them more. Sabo calls him back FIRST thing in the morning at like 7am (Sabo hopes he wakes Ace up out of his hangover nap just because Sabo wants to be as annoying as humanly possible in the shortest amount of time), and Ace is SO embarrassed. Not even a hi or hello, the first thing Sabo hears on the line is Ace’s groggy ass voice mumbling:

“I will fucking kill you if you utter a single fucking word.”

And what does Sabo say (the little shit)?

“Aww, just wanted to call my big brother on this fine morning and ask him how it felt to be a complete wet rag. I almost gagged this morning; I mean you really laid it on thick. ‘I miss you guys’ and ‘tell Luffy not to get into too much trouble’ or, maybe even my personal favorite, ‘don’t overwork yourself Sabo and make sure to sleep and eat well. If you die I’ll drag you back down and kill you myself’. You’ve gone soft I fear… and the sobbing?? I mean really you’ve outdone yourself.”

Ace would see red if he wasn’t on the verge of vomiting (and if Sabo’s impression of him wasn’t mildly hilarious). All Sabo hears (over his own laughter ofc) is a slew of curses and pained groans accompanied by heavy footfalls before the line cuts with a final venomous, “Fuck you.”

When Luffy bombards the ASL group chat a few hours later with a chipper voice message detailing how he just casually finished running from the cops, Ace is bout ready to book a flight back. The only thing that stops him is Luffy sending a quick:

“Oh! I love you too Ace, I never got to say it back because you kept crying like a little baby!”

Of course, seconded by Sabo with a little heart reaction and a slew of laughing emojis (Sabo may not say it directly often, but Ace thinks the heart reaction is enough). Despite the raging embarrassment (and the mild murderous intent) he felt at that moment, his lips quirked up into a smile as he read it. He may let the bullying slide just this once (he has gone soft, but maybe he doesn’t mind it).

Tags :) : @porschethemermaid

[theycallmeazalea]

Nezha headcanon(s) (angst and fluff) #4

⚠️ i want to clarify that this has a tad bit of romantic behavior, mentions of abusive behavior, death as well as SH. If you’re not comfortable with this, please scroll.⚠️

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•💮 fluff: Nezha is highly intelligent, having an IQ above average. He’s able to solve puzzles fairly easily and loves them to! He loved them so much that even the Jade Emperor customized a whole entire room as an escape room just for Nezha so he could at least do something fun in heaven.

•💮 fluff: Nezha used to call the Jade emperor “爷爷” (ye ye) or in private: “爹爹” (die die), due to Nezha not knowing his mortal grandfather, aswell that the Jade emperor is in theory his grandfather (Granddad and Grandson bonding)

•💮 angst: Nezha has audhd, but due to the fact that term didn’t exist back then (as in it wasn’t noticed as an actual disorder) people thought that Nezha was simply being a “man child”

•💮 angst: Nezha heavily dislikes DBK, due to the bull’s past implied abusive behavior towards Redson. Whenever Nezha visits the bull family he keeps an eye on dbk, especially when he’s around Redson.

•💮 Angst/Fluff: Nezha was the primary parental guardian of Redson due to Redson’s father being absent and PiF finding a way to save her beloved husband (neglecting her son in the process). This is why Redson kinda behaves like Nezha.

•💮 Angst: Nezha keeps his family photos, but crosses off Li Jing’s face. Because of their very toxic and overall negative history with eachother. Nezha does not see Li Jing as his dad nor apart of his family, and he would do anything to get away from Li Jing.

•💮 Fluff: Though Nezha and Sun Wukong in public seem to have tension between eachother, they actually have a stable and good friendship. The bitterness was all an act, and they both agreed to act as if they don’t really like eachother until someone notices their silly scheme.

•💮 Angst/fluff: Nezha really loves children and one day wants a family of his own, but due to the fact that he doesn’t have a spouse he’s not able to.

•💮 Fluff: Nezha, though cold and even short tempered is very empathetic. He knows exactly what to say to people and how to act around them. But because of that he’s able to swoon people fairly easily, being a good talker and even flirtatious at times. He’s a charming man basically with a high level of empathy.

•💮 Angst: Nezha sometimes play’s devil’s advocate whenever he knows something very important is on the line. Because of his empathy and ability to easily make someone vulnerable with his charm, he’s very much capable of manipulating someone without that person knowing. The reason for why is because of his god forsaken biological father, who’s probably also a master manipulator. But since Nezha’s dislike for his father he doesn’t chooses to take advantage of people.

•💮 Fluff: Nezha get’s easily flustered, and absolutely adores compliments. Though he doesn’t admit to it.

•💮 Fluff: Nezha only accepts PDA from the people who he’s comfortable with, if someone he doesn’t trust or doesn’t consider as a friend touches him he’ll simply smack away their hand or moves away from them. If they keep trying to break his boundaries, the next thing they know they’re on trail about if they’re going to heaven or hell.

•💮 Angst: Nezha has some coping mechanisms, due to his already well known childhood being a disaster and unhealthy. Since he wasn’t able to fully experience being a child, he in stressful and emotional situations where he’s more prone to a meltdown he’ll subconsciously act like how he acted as a child. Basically age regression. When he’s having a meltdown he most likely goes to his room and is more prone to harming himself.

•💮 Fluff: Nezha has a therapist, which is his teacher/father figure Taiyi Zhenren. Nezha is very fond of his teacher and in private calls him “dad” instead of “master/Shifu”. Nezha is slowly recovering from his past.

•💮 Nezha used to play tricks and or mind games on people, some of them are light hearted but some are complete torture. He once lead someone insane because of his tricks that led to that person commit suicide, after that Nezha promised to only use his tricks as punishments for the guilty.

•💮 Angst: Nezha personally does not like being pulled into fights, it’s especially heart breaking for him when he stumbles apon corpses of children that sadly lost their lives in conflicts. He buries them somewhere peaceful and hope that in the afterlife destiny would go easy on them.

(A/N): If I accidentally offended you on any way, I apologize.

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[madithehuman]

Diva

Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Summary: Wayne got Eddie tickets to see Iron Maiden in Indianapolis with his lovely lady, you. Thing is, Eddie turns into a bit of a diva when getting ready for an event like this. He wants everything to be perfect so he remembers it for the rest of his life. So when you’re ready to go, Eddie can’t find his favourite ring, and all hells breaks loose.

Disclaimers: Swearing, some light touching??

Side Notes: No upside down, no events of season 4. This is my second time writing a random middle of the night thought, not sure if anyone is even going to see this but if you do, thank you! My writing is very amateur so if anyone has any tips please send them my way. Enjoy!

The steam coming from the extremely hot shower was making it hard for you to do your hair in the small bathroom with the even smaller mirror. Constantly having to rub the small towel over the mirror to clear the steam off.

You’re running your fingers through the messy curls on your head mumbling small “mhm”’s while Eddie is behind the shower curtain talking your ear off about how excited he is for tonight.

Wayne had saved up and gotten Eddie two tickets to Iron Maiden’s Somewhere on Tour Tour with WASP also being in attendance, in Indianapolis. He insisted on Wayne coming with him but he denied quickly saying “I damn near have hearin’ loss just from you playin’ their music. I’ll ‘prolly go fully deaf if I hear the real thing. Take ‘yr girl who listens to that ruckus with you, it’s why I got ‘em for ‘ya.”

He called you immediately after Wayne said that. He was rambling so fast due to excitement he had to repeat himself twice for you to understand what he was saying. That was 2 months ago, and today is the day, the man has been bouncing off the walls since you both woke up in his bed this morning.

“I’m telling you. Come tomorrow morning I’m going to have no voice, probably won’t be able to move my neck, maybe a few scrapes and bruises, who the fuck knows!” Eddie says as he finishes up his shower.

“All I want out of this is a cool t-shirt.” You smile even thought he can’t see you. You love how excited Eddie gets for things he loves. Music, dnd, his books, you.

“Oh, I’m going to buy every piece of merchandise that booth has to offer. I’ve been saving since Wayne got these tickets.” It’s true. He has this special box on his desk that he puts money into when he’s saving up for something special.

You finished up your makeup quick and put everything back into your toiletries bag you keep under the sink at Eddie’s. You stay here a lot, you like to have your things with you always.

“Hurry up your shower babe, I’m almost ready and we should hit the road soon so we can check into the hotel and grab a bite to eat before the show.” You say as you put your bag under the sink. You guys were also able to save a little bit to get a hotel room just outside the arena, so you didn’t have to drive home in the middle of the night after rocking out a little too hard.

You stand and put on your skull necklace that was sitting in the jewelry dish you got for Eddie to put his rings in when he showers. The necklace resembles the skull ring Eddie has. When Eddie got the ring it came with a matching necklace as well. Eddie never wore necklaces but his guitar pick, so he just kept it in his room. But when you came along and were always so fascinated with his rings, especially the skull one, he gave you the necklace. Said you’d always have a part of him. He also said “It’s pretty fuckin’ metal on you babe,”

“Yes dear.” Eddie replies in a mocking tone. You snort and head out of the bathroom and into Eddie’s room to get dressed. You have an outfit laid out on his bed next to his laid out outfit, one of his very well loved Iron Maiden t-shirts, black jeans, and one of Eddie’s older leather jackets that doesn’t fit him anymore but fits you like a glove. Eddie’s outfit is an Iron Maiden long sleeve shirt with graphics on the front, sleeves, back, everywhere. Black jeans with rips in the knees and his battle vest with an extra WASP patch added to it.

Eddie comes sauntering in with a towel around his waist and his hair sopping wet.

“Eds. Dry your hair in the bathroom you’re getting water everywhere.” You try to dodge his clumsy movements as his wet curls sway around and cover the surfaces of his room in drops of water.

“My other towel was in here.” He takes it off his desk chair. “My hair looks better when I scrunch it dry with this towel.” He holds it up, then folds his body over to grip his curls with the towel and dry them into place.

“Does the towel have magic hair curling powers?” You giggle and Eddie looks up at you with a smirk, grabs you and starts to shake his head like a dog after a bath, covering you in spots of water.

“God damnit Eddie I just got dressed!” You laugh and try to push him away. He pulls away and laughs as well.

“And you look very nice my love.” He grins “But don’t be a smart ass.” He lightly taps your ass and you stick your tongue out at him.

“Get dressed. We need to go.” You tap your watchless wrist and step out of the room so he can get dressed without distractions. You saunter into the kitchen to grab some soda’s from the fridge you grabbed for the drive up to the city.

“You kids almost ready?” Wayne calls from the living room as he sits in his chair with a beer, watching some sports game.

“I think so, just waiting on your diva of a nephew to finish getting ready-“

“Fuck! Where is it?! Shit!” You both turn your head the direction of Eddie’s room as you both hear him frantically cursing and things flying around his room. “Babe?! Have you seen my ring?!” He calls in a panic.

“Which one Eds?” You call as you’re already walking to the bathroom, Wayne chuckling in the background, and looking in the jewelry dish. Which is empty.

“My skull one!” He calls back. You’re trying to remember if you saw it in there when you grabbed your necklace.

“I dunno, do you remember having it on before your shower?” You walk into his room, which you didn’t think could become more of a disaster.

“Yes? No? Fuck I don’t remember!” He says as he shoves his body under his bed, random items flying from where he’s lying.

“Okay chill out, we’ll find it. And if we don’t, no biggie” You try to reassure him as you also take a look around his room.

“No biggie?! That thing is my lucky charm! Always has been! And now it’s extra lucky because I have it matching with you!” He jolts himself out from under his bed and starts ripping the blankets and pillows off his bed like a madman, a stray pillow hitting you in the process.

“Okay, just- Eds just take a deep breath” You kick the pillow away as it fell at your feet. “When was the last time you saw it?” You stare at him as you watch the gears turn in his head as he thinks.

“Um, shit I don’t know. They’re just like a part of me now I don’t really think about ‘em.” His hand rubs up and down his jaw as he anxiously looks around still. “I did take them off last night when I was fixing the stereo in my van. I had to get my fingers in small places and the rings were getting in the way.” He sighs.

“Okay, I’ll go check your van and you keep checking your room okay? We’ll find it.” You stand on your toes and give his check a quick peck. He looks at you and gives you a little nod, but you can tell he’s not convinced.

You make your way out to Eddie’s van, grabbing his keys on the way out that were hung by the door. You whip open the drivers door and thank whatever god there is that while Eddie was fixing his stereo yesterday, you hung out in the van tidying it up for him, you wanted to spend time with him. But he had things to do, so you made it that you also had things to do.

You check in the centre console, glove box, cupholders, under all the seats, in the door slots, everywhere it feels like. A defeated sigh leaves your lips as you step out of the van and close the door.

“Well?!” Eddie’s voice comes from the trailer, as you look over he’s half hanging out his bedroom window. You just shake your head. “Fuck sake.” he grumbles and slides himself back in his room. When you step back into the trailer, Wayne has now also joined this fun easter egg hunt. He’s on all fours with a flashlight looking under the couch.

“How nicely did Eddie ask you to help?” You snicker as Wayne huffs out a chuckle.

“Not very, but I ain’t gon’ hol’ it against him.” Wayne gets back up on his knees, then uses the arm rest on the couch to stand fully up.

You and Wayne basically tear apart that living room to look while Eddie is still destroying his room. Curses and thumps coming from it as well. Finally you and Wayne just flop yourselves onto the couch.

“Did you try and tell ‘em it’ll be alright if you don’ find it?” Wayne leans forward to grab his fresh beer from the coffee table. You just slowly turn your head to him and raise your eyebrows a little as to say yeah and how do you think THAT went? He chuckles as he brings his beer to his lips.

Eddie comes flying out of his room, the curls he tried to keep at bay are now going every which direction and seem even poofier than usual.

“I’ve looked fucking everywhere and I can’t find it but- HEY!” You and Wayne both look at him at the sudden screech. “Are you guys- What’re you- Why aren’t you looking?!” He throws his hands up in the air.

“We looked everywhere we could. This trailer ain’t that big kid, not many hidin’ places.” Wayne says and Eddie just dramatically sighs and puts his hands on his hips. Very much resembling Steve when he’s giving the kids, or Eddie, a motherly scolding.

“Eddie, dearest, love of my life. We have to go. I know it’s your lucky charm and all, but the night is still going to be amazing, with or without the ring.” You stand to make your way over to him and Eddie puts his hands in the pockets of his vest, probably to grab a smoke and his head shoots up, same with his hand. Lo and behold in his hand, is that god damn ring.

“Yes! I found it! Oh thank god!” He dramatically kisses it and slides it back on his hand.

“You- You didn’t look in the pocket of your vest? Til just now? The vest you wear practically every single day?” You’re in disbelief he didn’t look there sooner. The only reason you didn’t is because you assumed he did.

“Ha uh, no. I guess I didn’t.” His voice drops a few octaves as he gets a little embarrassed at the mess he’s made looking for his ring, when it was in a very obvious spot. You pinch the bridge of your nose and let out a small huff and close your eyes.

“Is he still your dearest, love of your life.” Wayne mocks and chuckles behind you guys and Eddie grins at that. You also can’t help but break and laugh as well and look back up at Eddie. Your dearest, love of your life, Eddie.

“Yeah. He is.” You widen your smile and he sends you a wink. “Okay hot shot, we gotta go. Do you one hundred percent have everything?” You say as you head over to the door to start doing up your black converse.

“Yes, wallet.” He slaps his back pocket. “Rings.” Holds both his hands up to show you. “Keys.” He reaches up over you and grabs his keys from the holder on the wall. “My sweetheart.” he pinches your chin and plants a kiss on your lips. You smile into it and kiss him back.

“Weird, I don’t see your guitar strapped to your back, you sure you got your sweetheart?” You smirk at him and he pulls away and gives your cheek a little pinch.

“Smart ass.” He mumbles and you wink.

“Okay lovebirds get outta here or ‘yer gon’ miss ‘yer show.” Wayne grumbles from the couch as he takes another sip of his beer. You pull away from Eddie and give him a small shove.

“He’s right let’s go.” You turn. “Bye Wayne! Thanks again for the tickets!” He just gives you a small wave not looking away from the tv, but he’s got a small smile on his lips.

“Bye Wayne! Thanks again old man!” Eddie calls as he closes the door to the trailer behind you guys. As you round the van Eddie races in front of you and opens the passenger door for you. Kneels, and out stretches his arm to it he van. “M’lday.” He bows his head.

“Oh, you’re going to be an extra kiss ass now aren’t you?” You giggle and get in the van. Eddie rises back up and grins at you.

“Darlin’, you have no idea.” He closes the door and hops in the drivers side.

Let’s just say, after your drive to Indianapolis, Iron Maiden weren’t the only ones who rocked your world that night.

[xxshadowbabexx]

West Coast: The Train Ride

(Check series warnings on series masterlist)

You had left later than you had meant to, but you were lucky enough to still arrive on time to board the train. You weaved your way through each car, looking for any available seat. This is why you wanted to be early. You were almost to the last car when you spotted the first available seat next to a muscular, bear-like man. He didn’t look friendly necessarily, but a seat was still a seat and so you sat down, settling your luggage at your feet. He didn’t acknowledge you as you made yourself comfortable, and so you turned to introduce yourself. You were going to be on this train for hours, after all Being friendly might help the time go by. 

You extended an arm out as you told him your name, and he raised his brow, columbian eyes piercing through yours. After a moment, he finally took your hand, you could feel the callouses that decorated his skin, scarred tissue that would never heal. Nonetheless his touch was nice, warm. 

“Name’s John Price, doll,” he smiled sweetly. He had a wild, rugged look to him that you couldn’t seem to convince yourself to look away from, and found yourself getting lost in his colombian blue eyes. They were beautiful enough to swim in, and you found yourself leaning in, as if preparing yourself to dive and explore what lays beneath the crystal waters. 

You hadn’t realized you were still holding his hand until you heard him chuckle. You blushed out an apology, letting go of his hand and folding yours on your lap. 

“‘S alright,” he responded and your face flushed. What the hell allowed this man to be so attractive? 

Then he smirked at you, “Don’t know, doll, guess it’s just genetics,”

Could this get any more embarrassing? Probably not. Was this man going to be the death of you? Probably. 

You had a four hour trip to find out. 

The next twenty minutes went by in silence, him reading a book you couldn’t see the title of due to his hand placement, and you watching the scenery blur by through the window. 

You watched the green of the trees mix with the mundane browns and grays of the manmade buildings. Not necessarily a pretty picture, but a picture nonetheless. 

Every now and then you swear you could feel Mr. Price’s eyes on you, but when you turned to face him he never was looking at you. But what did it matter? It’s not like you wanted this handsome stranger to pay you any mind. 

You yawned, stretching your arms above your head and arching your back before settling again in your seat. 

“Tired, darlin’?” he asked, and you turned to face him. 

“A little,” you admitted sheepishly, smiling at him, but not looking in his eyes. You didn’t want to lose yourself in them again, and so instead you focused on his lips. On the thinner side, but they looked soft, kiss-able. 

“You can lie down on me if you want, I don’t mind,” he spoke, voice gravely. 

You blushed, “Oh it’s- I- are you sure? I don’t want to be a bother, Mr. Price,” you stuttered out, incredibly flustered. 

“It’s no bother t’ me, love. But you don’t need if you’re not comfortable. And please, call me John,”

You bit your lip, contemplating the offer. A rest would be nice, so would cozying up to him. However, you didn’t want to impose. But he did offer, so he mustn’t mind, right? 

Besides that, you’ve only just met him, so how can you be sure if he’s trustworthy? For all you know he could have ill intentions. 

You must be more tired than you initially thought, and it must be clouding your judgment because you found yourself laying your head on his shoulder, muttering your stop and asking him to wake you then before you drifted to sleep. 

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You awoke to a baritone voice in your ear, “Mornin’ sunshine, this is our stop,” he says as you sit up, rubbing the sleep off of your eyes. 

“Our stop?” you question and he nods. 

“Mhmm, I get off here too, darlin’,” he smiles at you, extending his arm out to help you up. 

You let him walk you out the train, turning to him once you exit. 

“See you around?” you ask bashfully, a undertone of hopefulness that you pray he doesn’t catch. 

He smiles at you “if you’re lucky, doll,”

And then he was gone, disappearing into the crowd. You stared at the spot where he had stood for several moments before gathering yourself bearings. 

Your best friend, Shelby, should be here to pick you up and take you to your apartment. Better to not keep her waiting. 

You got into Shelby’s dusty blue Chevrolet, buckling yourself in as she started driving. 

“So how was your trip?” she asked, voice bubbly as ever. 

“Oh, it wasn’t much of a trip. I was just visiting my parents for the weekend, you know this,”

Shelby tutted, “I know, I know. But did anything exciting happen? Fun?”

You pondered that for a second. Was meeting Mr. Price- John either of those things? It wasn’t necessarily fun, and it wasn’t all that exciting in the moment. But he sure did leave your belly full of butterflies and critters of the like after. 

You turned back to Shelby, “No, can’t say so,” you shrugged. Shelby knew everyone in this part of town, if John was a regular she would surely know him. 

Which is why you didn’t tell her. You’ve been wowed by the idea of too many men and left disappointed by the real thing each time. 

Maybe John would be better off kept in your head. 

taglist

@frogtowne @glossysoap

© xxshadowbabexx 2024. please do not steal, copy, plagiarize, translate, or repost any of my works without my permission. do not steal any elements of my theme without permission.

[deathmetalunicorn1]

may i request trafalgar law!reader x class 1a? 😊 thank you!

-You were rather popular around school, due to your good looks, but your attitude sometimes caused issues, mainly with Bakugo, but he has issues with everyone.

-You personally didn’t really want to be in the Hero Program, you wanted to be a doctor, but the school officials were adamant, with your ability, that you would be in the Hero Program, much to your annoyance.

-You were polite to others if you were treated the same way, but you didn’t really go out of your way to make friends, as you felt like you didn’t need them, something Corazon, your adoptive father, whacked you on the head for, telling you that friends are important.

-The quirk you had could be used with or without your weapon of choice, a long nodachi sword, as that was the tool you used for when you needed to handle large items or groups of people to make your quirk work.

-Many knew, despite you not wanting to be a hero, you could be very dangerous if you wanted to be, many even tried to bully you, saying that your quirk and the way you use it is something more like what a villain would have.

-You didn’t care about their words, to you they were just talking and showing their two-faced nature, proving that they couldn’t be heroes either, as heroes wouldn’t try to bully others. You’ve called a handful of them out on that, which was quick to shut them off and make them back off you, much to your relief.

-Many of your classmates were impressed with your skills, from you being able to teleport, to cutting people into pieces without hurting them, and cutting large pieces of material with ease.

-Many of them praised you, telling you that you would be an expert rescue hero, which did make you smile, but when you told them that you wanted to be a different kind of hero, wanting to be a doctor.

-They were surprised but many were quick to agree that doctors were heroes, as they helped save people’s lives, working at hospitals rather than being on the front lines with the professional heroes.

-Bakugo was quick to chest up to you, “What you think you can’t be a hero?” you just smirked up at him, giving him a challenge, “Someone will need to stitch you back together when you get your ass kicked.” Tenya had to hold Bakugo back as he was yelling at you, calling you a bastard and that he was going to take you down a peg.

-Bakugo was more grateful to you, when you helped Deku and the others rescue him after he was taken, when the was about to be grabbed when he managed to escape, you shouted out, “Shambles!” and instantly he had switched places with you and you slashed down with your sword, slicing a piece of the building you were on with the League of Villains, making them fall before you teleported back, using a nearby rock of Bakugo.

-He told you that he had to admit your skills were pretty impressive, “But I’m still a better hero than you.” You just smirked again, waving your hand slightly over your shoulder, “But more reckless~”

-Bakugo shouted at you as you all headed towards the police, telling you that he was going to kick your ass, while Deku looked exasperated, wishing that you wouldn’t provoke Bakugo so much, something the others agreed on.

[robyn-i-guess]

gerrymichael enjoyers and writers i want your opinion 🎤

ok so i have this au fic for gerrymichael where it's college au, and it's a like the whole bad boy/good girl (minus the fact they're both boys, and even that's questionable)

basically, gerry is stereotyped due to his more alternative looks and everyone assumes he's probably doing illegal things or just sleeps around a lot

meanwhile michael is the head of student council "goody two shoes" type, who most are sort of aware of but don't know anything about

gerry thinks about michael. a lot. he sees them in the halls for only a few seconds a day but thinks about him for a lot longer. hallway crush vibes. and when they get put into a painting class together, suddenly they have an opportunity to meet, and gerry is freaking out a usual amount. (there's more to the whole plot but that's just the beginning bit)

putting a short lil concept thing under the cut

Gerard Keay does not know Michael Shelley.

The only reason he knows their name is because they're in the student council, meaning it's not uncommon for their name to be said during school events.

He has only seen them in hallways, passing by in a rush while holding papers or books that always seem like they're going to fall out of their hands. Even in those moments, most of what Gerard is able to catch is a blur of golden curls and eyes that are ridden with exhaustion.

So, it is safe to say that he does not know Michael.

That fact only caused confusion to him whenever Gerard realized his strange excitement once learning that Michael would be in one of his classes for the semester.

It was an art class, one that he had picked due to him already being practiced is painting and drawing. He assumed it would be a fun class, or at least one that wouldn't be too stressful. However, when he had first walked into that classroom and saw Michael Shelley sitting at an area in the back, Gerard had assumed the emotion he was feeling was stress. He couldn't pinpoint why, it wasn't like he was intimidated by their status, but he couldn't shake the feeling of nervousness he felt when he accidentally locked eyes with them. He turned his head quickly in that moment, deciding to sit in the front of the room despite that not being where he'd usually prefer to be. Something about Michael sitting there made Gerard think twice about sitting in the back as he normally would.

The lecture went smoothly, it mostly being an introduction to the professor and what would be happening throughout the classes. So did the next, and then the next one after that. That didn't get rid of the feeling he felt, however, every time that Gerard walked into that room and attempted to avoid looking at the one with golden curls in the back. He knew he'd have to talk to them at some point, it was inevitable, but there was something about them that meant he was more nervous to talk to them than he usually would be. And he very much denied the idea that it could be caused by any... feelings he may have. Gerard ruled it as impossible, as he had never spoken to them, and he wasn't that much of an idiot to fall for someone he'd only mostly seen in hallways.

Michael wasn't one to speak up in class, and instead they'd work silently on any research on the history of art they may have been doing, only giving simple responses or nods when the professor would come around and ask how their work was coming along. When Gerard thought about it, he didn't really know what their voice sounded like because it was always quiet or unintelligible from their distance. That only made him more interested in talking to them.

That day never came, though, much to Gerard's disappointment.

They both went through that class without talking to each other once, and when Gerard left that room for the last time he couldn't help but feel like he had failed at some kind of goal. A failure that had meant he would be left with only seeing the elusive Michael Shelley in hallway rushes again, which annoyed him in a way he didn't understand.

He did talk to them one day, though.

(note this is old as heck lmao i've gotten better at writing since i wrote this)

anyways yeah. should i continue it or is it too basic idk, i want to write it for me but it would also be multiple chapters long and my "1k-words-is-rare-for-me" self probably won't bother to write it unless someone else is interested

[fedyaplushie]

an analysis of the fyodor breakdown scene—the truth, an act, or something else entirely?

warning: !!minor spoilers for the brothers karamazov!!

To believe Fyodor is an honest person is the way of the fool, but to mistrust every word he says and view them as lies will not put you in a better position, either.

By dismissing every dialogue of his, you are still, in a way, putting trust in him. Putting trust in the fact that he is a liar. And thus, you may miss out on important, vital information.

He could be hiding some specks of truth in his words, in his actions, and you will never know, because you already marked him as a liar. Yet he is most definitely not a truthful person, either.

So, it is hard to know... when is he lying? When is he telling the truth? When is he leading us to believe that a truth he told is actually a lie?

With Fyodor, it is very difficult to tell, and one of the moments that proves this the most, is the infamous Fyodor breakdown scene from Chapter 108.

Many people have already discussed the Fyodor breakdown scene which has led the fandom to two major conclusions: either he is genuinely being plagued by a second personality (be it via possession or otherwise), or the entire scene was an act, as Fyodor himself claimed.

I myself have thought about this scene many times, and even wrote up my own thread, in which I discussed the possibility of Fyodor suffering from a real mental breakdown after seeing the note, and then quickly coming up with a bullshit lie of having a second personality to throw Sigma off-guard and claim the upper hand, which he was in need of after showing such a vulnerable side to one of his enemies.

As of right now, I have not yet discarded that possibility, for I want to remain open-minded, no matter what curveballs Asagiri may throw at us. However, I wanted to consider other options, too. We always talk about whether Fyodor was acting or not, but what if there's more to it?

Let's break down the scene:

Sigma shows Fyodor, while holding him at gunpoint, the note he found on the ground of the Meursault hallways, the one which has the Russian translation for "help me" written on it.

Fyodor inspects the note before suddenly scooting back and screaming, leaving Sigma confused. He keeps muttering "help me" to himself, continues screaming, until he goes silent, waits a few short seconds, quickly shoots up and asks Sigma, "What year is it?"

The inclusion of that question has definitely rung alarm bells after recent chapters have revealed that Fyodor may or may not be much older than any other mortal human being—it is at least fair to assume that he was somehow alive centuries ago, if his memories are to be believed.

However, I'm much more interested in what happens next...

He speaks of a demon. The demon that is his ability, the ability that took over him due to his own weakness. He switches from using "him," to refer to the demon, to "I," implying that the demon is a part of himself.

Some have taken this to mean that he is possessed in one way or another (especially with the most recent chapters), but I would like to offer up a different interpretation.

Let's assume the entire scenario was genuine... I am not able to answer who may have written the note or why a Russian "help me" would be enough to trigger Fyodor, but let's assume it did, and his breakdown was real.

My thought was, what if this entire spiel with Sigma came as a result of his own mind?

He has allegedly lived for a long time, seeing himself as a servant of God in his quest to bring humanity to the promised land. Living so long, following such a goal so strictly, would have a toll on one's mind, no? We don't know what Fyodor was like before his ability and/or his immortality manifested, so who's to say that serving such an abstract goal for such a long time wouldn't cause one to have a distorted sense of self?

Moments ago, he was screaming and curled up on the floor. It wouldn't be unlikely that such a moment of mental vulnerability would cause his more distorted sense of self to show itself. Especially when one considers that he asked Sigma what year it was the moment he calmed down, he was clearly quite confused over his surroundings.

So, my conclusion was, that the one he calls a "demon" could simply be referring to the parts of himself that his inner self, deeply buried within, despises, or, maybe more accurately, fears the most. Someone whom he can mentally shift the blame onto, speaking of the demon and his ability as if they were one and the same. If the manifestation of his ability (which many believe is what is causing him to be potentially immortal) was what originally caused him to think that he must have been chosen to fulfill some grand quest, then that makes it all the more likely.

In short, with this interpretation, I do not believe he is possessed. I don't think he has a second personality, either. Both the demon/ability and Fyodor himself are parts of Fyodor, with this scene giving insight into what he truly thinks of himself—a feeble being who was easily overcome by his weakness, and the temptation of his ability and viewing himself as a servant of God.

And then there's the part with the Sword Kladenets (if we're to assume that he was telling the truth about their holiness and that the part about it being a simple guard's knife was a lie), where he asks Sigma to kill him, which is a whole other aspect to consider, if my interpretation is correct...

The one thing that throws me off is how quickly Fyodor came back from all of this, but I honestly wouldn't be surprised if he could easily overcome such vulnerable states and act as if it was nothing. We're talking about Fyodor, after all.

Now, I've held this interpretation for quite a few months now, yet I waited until now to bring it up. Why? Simply because my interpretation had no basis. There was, as far as I was aware, nothing to back my thoughts up, and I didn't want to talk about something I myself barely believed in. This interpretation was solely an idea, maybe a gut feeling, but it was never solid in any way.

Until very recently, when a friend of mine texted me to talk about a scene in The Brothers Karamazov... the scene where Ivan Karamazov speaks with the devil. And the scene which Asagiri himself has stated served as an inspiration for Fyodor's character.

Yet that scene is not Ivan's first encounter with the 'devil.' He strongly implies throughout the book that he has had multiple encounters with "him," yet it is not until that very scene—the scene Asagiri which was referring to—until we, as readers, are able to experience it ourselves, through his—Ivan's—lens.

In this scene, Ivan experiences a hallucination as a result of his illness (delirium tremens)... a hallucination where the devil is speaking with him.

The "devil"—whom Ivan acknowledges as an embodiment of his own "thoughts and emotions, though only those that are most loathsome and stupid."

Sound familiar?

Well, I could go on and on about the "Ivan speaks with the Devil" scene and how well it fits into my interpretation of Fyodor's breakdown scene, but this analysis is already quite long, so I may save that for another day...

But I believe I have reached my point—that my interpretation, which I developed solely through gut feeling and creativity, sounds eerily similar to what Ivan experiences, especially in the scene we are privy to... the scene which, once again, has been confirmed by Asagiri to have served as an inspiration for Fyodor's character.

Yet, despite this, I am not entirely convinced, though definitely more than I was before.

While my interpretation may be correct, it's also possible that Asagiri is pulling an UNO Reverse Card and that, while the BSD scene truly could be inspired by the TBK scene, Fyodor was only using the mention of a demon as a lie to throw Sigma off, while in Ivan's case, it was 'genuine.' It is also entirely possible that Fyodor did have a talk with the devil—a.k.a. the part of himself he loathes the most—at some point in the past, and used that experience to make his lie more convincing. Who knows, maybe I'm looking into this way too much and those two scenes have no relation to each other, whatsoever!

"People are quick to believe they are thinking of their own free will. [...] we trust that everything we discover is valuable. We're loath to believe that our thoughts are being controlled."

And thus, we start looking for meaning in panels and dialogue that are either red herrings or don't even have any meaning at all... I am wary of that. Which is why I have elected to stay open-minded, instead of believing in only "one true theory."

But I still want to have some faith in my interpretation and that is why I am sharing it with you. Even if I end up being wrong, I am happy to be able to share my thoughts!

(Forgive me, if I am not the first one to share this idea. Due to spoiler warnings, I have avoided any Fyodor analysis posts, that contain TBK in any way, therefore, I am unaware of the content of said posts.)

Thank you so much for reading this far! I appreciate it!

Shout-out to @/xKolyaMxxx (Twitter) for giving me the motivation to write this analysis by sharing and discussing a similar idea with me!

Huge thanks to @creantzy for making me aware of the content of the TBK scene, for sharing photos of the English translation of the book, and, most of all, for discussing this topic with me, and helping me out a lot!

[thetarttfuldickhead]

isaac: protective and loyal as fuck but can’t tell his best friend he loves him

colin: rip to you but i am different

colin: you’re like the third guy i told today

isaac: yeah but—wait who else did you tell?!

colin: michael. my boyfriend michael. yeah i have a boyfriend his name is michael you met him at ola’s.

isaac: … yeah okay makes sense. who else?

colin: jamie

isaac: YOU TOLD JAMIE BEFORE YOU TOLD ME

colin: well he was really supportive and it was after the game and he was hugging me what was i supposed to do

colin: also HE said it back

colin: still you tried to beat that guy up for me so yeah i do know man

[mejomonster]

On a serious note, I do feel mysterious case lotusbook has a lot of sincere themes about getting older, realities of responsibility and dreams realized, how it's difficult to succeed and not always the direct path one expects, how there's value in little aspects of life. Almost every li lianhua scene seems to be about that to some degree. The murder cases aren't particularly deep as far as super complicated to figure out or Able to be predicted super well (since they don't always give all the details in the initial setup), but the themes about who was killed and why do connect to li lianhuas situation.

[dazais-guardian-angel]

kinda wild to me that one of the most compelling aspects of both Chuuya and Kunikida's characters to me, that I never really see talked about, is how they're heavily set on a doomed crash course towards complete and utter destruction, and how I am so, so worried for them both.....

[m4niackkyun]

Hi. (Announcement in the tags)