#but only for you :/
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trying so hard every day all day to be androgynous and masc as fuck, I
but coming home at night to you
you make me want to be so pretty for you
wearing dresses and skirts, pretty lacy lingerie
a pretty collar, tights you can rip apart
makeup smeared across my face, high pitched screams and whines as you pound into me
for you, I can be anything you want me to be
#I just want to be a pretty puppy#but only for you#force masc#force femme#ftm ns/fw#ns/fw#queer nsft#t4t ns/fw#t4t nsft#trans nsft#ftm nsft#t4t bottom#t4t breeding#nsft puppy#puppy bites#dumb puppy#pretty puppy
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ford: stan. weird question
stan: what is it?
ford: would you care if i disappeared. if you woke up one day and i was just gone. if you turned around when we were on one of our anomaly hunts and i suddenly wasn't there anymore
stan: ...ford. i spent thirty years straight trying to get you back when you first disappeared. if you went missing, you know i'd never stop looking for you
ford: mm. i'll try not to go missing then
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Someone take my phone off me because I have typed the words I'm in love with you to my crush and then deleted them immediately after but I get closer and closer to actually sending it everyday I'm gonna explode
#sumarmz waffles#lesbianism is not for the weak#especially when you dont even know if its actually love or just unhealthy obsession 😭#ive experienced limerance once i am not doing that crap again#this is the consequences of codependent homoerotic friendships#words of advice from a 15 year old: if ur also queer friend says you should get married if x happens#run.#Its the start of the end#the beginning of the borderline dating stage where you both THINK you have a crush on each other and its painfully obvious#yet neither of you confess#yet you still act gay#then you both get over the crush#and you discover you liked each other#and you lie awake in agony every night thinking of what couldve been#then the crush resurfaces#but only for you#if i had a nickel for everytime i was in a codependent homoerotic friendship where i at some point believed i was obsessively in love#id have two nickels.#which isnt a lot but its weird that it happened twice#phineas and ferv reference go crazy#im about to pass out as i write this#tell my story#my eyelids are dropping#ive drooped my phone multiplrer times#yet i must oerservere
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Love that I’m getting some asks in my inbox, I will be answering those eventually so thanks guys. 🥰 Just one question though.
How did you all know that I wasn’t drinking water? Every single ask so far (just two, but still) also comes with a demand that I consume water and stay hydrated. How did you know I wasn’t? I mean, do I ever take care of myself? No. But y’all are coming for me.
#And now I gotta do it too#Because I can’t let the mutuals down like that#I will stay healthy.#But only for you#Water#inbox#asks#staying hydrated
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I feel immensely blessed to still have those wonderful buttons
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'ao3 needs a like and dislike button'
what you need, my algorithm-rotten minded friend, is a grip
#ao3#archive of our own#what.do.you.MEAN#how do these takes still find me#HOW#'but I only want to read the good stuff' THAT MEANS DIFFERENT THINGS TO DIFFERENT PEOPLE#THERE ARE HIDDEN GEMS YOU WONT EVEN FIND#also you know what you TRULY want? fics recs it's called fic recs but hey cant have that if you dont read THE FUCKING FICS first#imagine thinking fanworks are uniquely for your consumption and products to be ranked on a scale#ANYWAY it just boggles the mind#mine
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do you guys know about the internet roadtrip? right now somewhere between 500 and 900 people are collectively 'driving' a car on google street view trying to make it to canada. it's fun i recommend it
#last night they were listening to a college radio station in maine and the dj was giving shoutouts#i think they're trying to stop at the radio station hq on the way to canada#there are only 3 things you can vote to do: drive change the station or honk#internet roadtrip
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my most toxic trait is i fucking love work gossip. i play neutral not to be the bigger person or take the high road but to hear slander and hearsay from every side. two coworkers complained about each other to me in the same afternoon and i nearly blacked out from the rush
#only for like general annoyances of course not like#This Person Is Legitimately Bad#do i have to couch all my posts still you guys get it right
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ok im going to #seriouspost for a second here. I don't think Harry Potter is a manifesto. I think it was a flawed passion project that millennials latched onto because of the fantasy of sticking it to their mean teachers and arbitrarily categorizing themselves (hogwarts houses; it's the thinking millennial's astrology). I think the fact that the series got popular when and how it did was very much a product of its time.
I don't think Harry Potter is the biggest symbol of JKR's bigotry. I think the most flagrant sign of that was how she responded to critics. I watched her become radicalized in real time. I watched how she doubled down on her racism when she was called out for the ways she promoted her tragically mid fantastic beasts movies. I watched her chase marginalized teenagers with a double digit follower count off of twitter for daring to criticize her thought process, and no one with any kind of power standing against her because she was the one who was paying them. This isn't to say Harry Potter is without flaws. This is to say she really didn't give a shit about that. Getting rich and powerful is a hell of a drug, and she had enough sycophants that she had no reason to care about what her critics were saying.
She was convinced that she was a martyr; a voice for the unheard; a leader for the ages, so of course her detractors were the bad guys. And I think we should take this to heart. We should see this as an example of how easy it is to get radicalized; if you think of yourself as a paragon of virtue, you are going to think that whatever you see as good and right is an objective fact. Most people don't know this, but the majority of terfs start out as trans allies. You are not immune to propaganda! You are not immune to falling into dangerous ideologies!!!
This is why the most important thing you can do as an activist is to listen. Do NOT think you're above being wrong; do NOT develop a god complex; do NOT form an identity out of being right all the time. Involve yourselves in the groups you claim to speak for. Listen to trans women; share resources that help trans women; familiarize yourself with the diversity of experiences that trans people have and the struggles they face.
No, none of you are as bad as JKR because you don't have her money or her power. You will likely never have the capacity for harm she does. But check yourselves. Do not affirm yourselves into thinking you always have the moral high ground. Watch yourselves; humble yourselves; check yourselves for signs of cult behavior and internalized prejudice. You are always learning. You will always be learning. Do not allow yourselves to get a power trip from brushing off marginalized voices.
#zee zee rants#if im talking out of my ass here ill delete the post idc i wont die on any hill#anyway if people you're propping up are more of a symbol to you than a group of people you are susceptible to developing prejudiced ideas#based on fearmongering instead of reality#also its funny that the more bigoted she got the more mid her works became#jesus christ i dont think even she has the funds to get people to continue the fantastic beast movies#i think only her most diehard fans are going to watch the harry potter reboot#anyway#harry potter tw#jk rowling tw
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“kids spend too much time on their devices” well what else are they supposed to do? there’s no corner shops with pinball machines in them on every corner anymore. there’s no malls or stores in small towns for teens to hang out in without being suspected of shoplifting or kicked out for loitering. sidewalks are too broken for them to ride their bikes and there’s no bike lane in the street to make it safe for them. i just don’t understand where they expect these kids to go when they keep taking places away from them. and yes having no safe public places for them is what leads a lot of teens into addiction if they end up at a place where people aren’t truly looking out for them.
#autumn rambles#sorry i started thinking about this and now i can’t stop#my parents had arcades and corner shops they could hang out in where the owners treated them like family…#i have a gas station where only old men like to hang out there#(also want to clarify i left libraries off of here because you have to be quiet there.#it’s nice for a place to study but it’s not really a place for fun unless you love reading which not everyone does)
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also I got a tattoo partially re-coloured today and they bandaged me in veterinary wrap like I'm a sick horse
#the original tattoo was coloured just fine!#the only problem was that one of the colours was clashing with the tattoo just above it#the neon pink fish belly didn't match well with the earthy palette of my medieval lady#so I had a guy go over it and make the fish belly bright red#(which IS a colour you see in illuminated manuscripts!)#and now I'm very happy with everything
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Sometimes you need to read something twice to get it. You might need to watch a movie three times to understand it. You might have to have that album on repeat for a week until the lyrics make any sense. You're allowed to engage with it and can keep engaging with it until it means something to you. People will see a painting at a museum and laugh about not getting what the big deal is but like you can come back, you can see it at another time, and maybe that next time it'll be different for you. I'm of the belief the "media literacy crisis" would solve itself if more people just sat down and did it again. Watched, read, played, listened, etc like I don't think people are getting more ignorant necessarily I just think we're not glorifying personally replaying things nearly as much as we should be.
#Consumer has been the worst word to describe people in years because consumption has a sense of finality#Like I get it its for corporate reasons but self identification as a consumer should only be left for when you report to the BBB#Be a patron or enthusiast or a fan or connesuier or lover or appreciator or customer literally anything#Something to indicate your purpose in the transactional nature of the process goes beyond mindless cattle behavior
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i just need to have more rules for myself. more rules and limits. surely that will help me

#ed tag#ana tag#bpd#ocd#< i don't have ocd but thought some of you might relate#adhd#autism#asd#control#control issues#will i follow the rules? no. will that only cause more distress bc why am i too weak to be disciplined and follow my rules? yes.
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Batfamily reunion, kinda ?
Not my idea: https://x.com/tocartss/status/1897135638438404416?s=46&t=zkCvxQnVoZvDMu4v7483qg
#batfam#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#damian wayne#I speedrun this don't zoom in#It's only pretty if you don't
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