#but please do I love my dumb theories and will share them at the drop of a hat

[aragornsrockcollection]

Why didn’t Durin’s Bane seemingly have any ambition of his own, like his fellow Maiar in Sauron or Saruman? Obviously Gandalf, Radagast and the Blue Wizards all had their own thing going on as well, but the Balrog was seemingly content to chill in Moria for thousands of years, for some reason? In theory, would the Balrog have been cognisant enough to seek rehabilitation in Valinor, as Sauron was offered during the First Age?

Omg another question about Maiar! I could speculate on this stuff all day. Also, I am a Tolkien textwall waiting to happen I’m so sorry.

So I’m not sure Durin’s bane would have been offered the same deal as Sauron, and hiding was probably their best bet for not being thrown into the void.

First, Sauron had to pretend to repent to get offered that deal, and there is no reason to believe the Maia later known as Durin’s Bane would have been willing to do that, or that he would be able to pull it off- Sauron being absolutely unmatched when it comes to persuasion is a plot point multiple times, thus ‘Sauron the Deciever.’

Second, even after obtaining mercy Sauron just uses seemingly coming quietly as a smoke screen to escape and do basically the same thing as the Balrog for a while- lay low and lick his wounds.

I do think the Balrog from Moria has more agency than we might think. They’re definitely not a brainless monster, it’s just we only see them for like, a page, and Durin’s Bane was a mystery prior to the Fellowship encountering them.

But I don’t think it’s unfair to say Melkor’s original Maia might be more intrinsically tied to his will than Sauron, who was originally Mairon, Maia of Aule, and defected in the years of the lamps. At the very least, despite how loyal Sauron was (and he was pretty loyal, he gets Numenor to worship Melkor, not him) he did have thousands of years of existence outside of Melkor’s service, which makes him probably more versed in making his own decisions and plans.

Whereas Melkor’s Balrogs were the Ainur who sang along to his theme of discord in the original music, so they are more directly tied to him, never existed as something not his servant, and I doubt had much hope of not being thrown into the void to join their master, even if they went to Valinor to be judged.

SPEAKING OF THE VOID

I do have a theory with no real textual support about what the Balrog was doing down there, and it was not just chilling.

I have mentioned this tinfoil hat theory in another post about the “Nameless things” that “gnaw at the world” under Moria that Gandalf mentions only to be like “but I am not gonna talk about that.”

So the theory is based on the fact that in the second age, the world is flat. So if you were trying to create a pathway back into the world from the void, down is a legitimate direction to go.

The idea that barriers of the world are thin beneath Moria is really backed up by those nameless things gnawing at existence like parasites down there- if this is a weak spot in the walls of the world, either because of those nameless things or perhaps the nameless things are there because it is a weak spot, then I think it’s very suggestive that the last Balrog, one of Morgoth’s original servants, is there.

Trying to make a path back from the void for their master perhaps? And it seems like they might even be making progress if those creatures that are OLDER THAN THE AINUR (Gandalf says they are older than Sauron, and this means they must have dwelt in the void before existence) are slipping through the cracks into Arda.

But then at the end of the second age, the world is made round by Eru Iluvitar. Ostensibly so Valinor cannot be invaded like Numenor is attempting, but why can’t it serve numerous purposes? If a servant of Morgoth is close to creating a means for his return at the bottom of the world, folding existence around that point so that now instead of being at the edge of the world they are at the heart of it, with nowhere to go? That solves that problem. And some void creatures, nameless things, get trapped there too.

After all, the sinking of Numenor does feel pretty harsh. If you can sink a continent you can sink a fleet just as easily, and that spares the innocent. Hell, the Valar barred the shores of Valinor on their own in the first age pretty easily, and Numenor didn’t have a Silmaril to cheat with like Earendil.

But if there were multiple reasons for the rounding of the world and the sectioning off of Valinor, then Numenor could be a victim of just being too close to the point where the world doubled over itself. Two seas become one with a tidal wave that conveniently drowns Sauron.

Note: I do not think Tolkien intended it to be seen as an overreaction, this sort of thing happens in the Bible Old Testament all the time, and he has a very “talk shit get hit” attitude to going against divine power. But it doesn’t sit well with me personally if you want me to see Eru and the Valar as compassionate, which he clearly does intend, so I’m tacking on the idea that the world needed to be round for more than one reason and Numenor was in part collateral damage to preventing the possible return of Morgoth for my own enjoyment of the story. This theory doesn’t need this detail to float, but I like it, this entire thing has no proof anyways, and you can’t stop me.

It would also make sense that we weren’t aware of this, because we are reading about the rounding of the world in the histories of the elves, and this plot to burrow out of the world would have taken place in the dark, with none save Eru the wiser.

So that’s my completely unsubstantiated take on what the Balrog of Moria was up to. They were digging Morgoth an escape tunnel, were foiled, took their frustration out on the dwarves who discovered their operation, then slept with no better options available than to bide their time. They probably had no knowledge of Sauron’s shenanigans, but perhaps awakening to the greater part of Morgoth’s old lieutenant’s power being carried under their nose was enough to stir interest in what was going on in the world.

Certainly if they’d gotten hands on the Ring middle earth would have been screwed, so moral of the story is:

Glorfindel would have been very useful at this point and it’s hilarious that Gandalf shoots down his inclusion in the fellowship and pats the price by having to fight the Balrog himself.

[scienter]

Note: I had to copy and paste this ask from Word because when I returned to my inbox to answer it was no longer there. Idk what happened. 🤔

Hi. I'm not sure how to tumblr. I'm basically here because a friend linked me to one of your tvd metas after I started watching the show a few weeks back. I was halfway through the penultimate season when I decided to drop it altogether. Something tells me the writers either hated Stefan & Caroline or at least they didn't want them to be happy. And while I understand stefan's character trait of being consumed by revenge, he's been acting so irrationally this season that after a point even his otherwise weak-willed, bad strategist, impulsive brother was like 'I quit! You deal with your BS!' Fortunately/unfortunately I'm aware of the series finale & I think the writers never wanted Stefan's hero hair to have any character development so that they could justify his death as some sort of sacrifice but in the end it was to service his selfish brother's manpain. I wonder how people watched tvd for 8 years and I'm not saying it didn't have great moments but I also noticed how they rinsed-repeated storylines every season. For e.g Stefan seems to be dumbed down version of who he originally is and kind of reminds me of Tyler whose life pretty much changed for the worse because of Klaus or when he was so stupid that he was practically going to use his own body to put Klaus down in s4 & didn't even bother telling Caroline about it until she found out about it or something. Thankfully, this time Caroline didn't sleep with her boyfriends's mom's murderer though. What an absolute nightmare that would have been. Sorry for the rant but that wasn't the sole point of this message. I noticed you are a X-Files fan! Yay! If you don't mind me asking what's your favourite Mulder-Scully scene? And just out of curiosity,have you watched Normal People? If yes, then what's your opinion? If no, then please do watch. I think you'd love/enjoy the series.It's insane how much the characters, their individual characters arcs & overall journey is similar to that of Stefan and Caroline but with quality writing. Lastly,what does "scienter" mean? Thanks, Chandreyee. P.S: My friend is a Delena shipper & thinks Delena is the best thing to have happened on TVD * rolls eyes * but seemed to have enjoyed your blog back in the day. Hence ,the recommendation.

Hi there, Chandreyee. Welcome to tumblr!

Stefan & The TVD Finale

Oh, I’ve had my share of rants about the TVD finale and how Kevin Williamson spitefully killed Stefan because he wasn’t going to get the Stelena ending he wanted. That’s not a crackpot theory – he said as much in an interview. So yeah. We got the nonsensical finale that reverted Stefan & Damon to their season 1 characterization. That frustrated me given that I spent 8 years watching that show.

And like you one of the things I disliked about TVD was the repetitious storytelling. The formulaic storytelling drove me nuts, especially in the later seasons.  I take it as a sign that a story has gone on too long. If a writer can’t imagine new conflicts or plots then it’s time to call it quits.

Favorite Mulder & Scully Scene

Oh, wow. This is hard. Because there are ten or fifteen (or twenty) Mulder and Scully scenes that I could call my favorite.

I love their last scene in Triangle when Mulder tells Scully he loves her.  

I love their scene in Detour when Scully sings Jeremiah Was A Bullfrog.

I love their scene in Folie a Deux when Mulder tells Scully that she’s his “one in five billion.”

I love every single scene of theirs in Bad Blood.

And I love, love, love Mulder teaching Scully to play baseball a.k.a. Hips Before Hands in the Unnatural.

And of course, I’d be remiss to leave out Mulder & Scully dancing to Walking in Memphis in The Post Modern Prometheus.

I could go on. I love Mulder & Scully. They are my favorite tv couple. They are my original ship. I don’t know how to distill my love of them to a single scene.

I’ve thought about writing a Top Ten Favorite Mulder & Scully Moments meta over the years, but I’ve have never gotten around to it. Maybe I’ll do it this year. Hmm . . .

Normal People

No, I’ve never seen Normal People. I’ve heard good things about it though.

Scienter

Scienter is a legal term for intent or knowledge of wrongdoing (i.e., the defendant knew that his or her act or statement was illegal, deceptive, or wrong.) It’s random, I knew. I chose it because (1) it was short, (2) I could spell it, and (3) the word’s obscurity meant that it was available.

[beskarhearts]

soft javi idea!!! he confesses to you about his crush on you and how you make him not want to be an asshole anymore 🥺

Bad Coffee (Javier Peña x reader)

Pairing: Javier Peña x f!reader

Word count: over 2.8K

Warnings: cursing, mention of sex/brothels, drinking (nothing else I can think of but let me know!

Summary: Javier Peña wasn’t the type to ask people on dates or have feelings. At least that was what you thought.

Notes: UM I LOVE THIS AND I HOPE YOU DO TOO! I am an absolute sucker for soft Javi so this was soooooo fun to write and definitely helped. Pretty much I am ALWAYS willing to write Soft!Javi because it is the greatest. (also haven’t really proof read this yet so please excuse any mistakes!)

_____________________________

Late nights at the office with Javier has become the usual for you two. You were both hell-bent on catching Escobar and if that meant spending every second at the office and getting maybe an hour or two of sleep each night, then that was what it meant. So even when everyone else left the office and Murphy retired for the night, you and Javier would be sitting at your respective desks and mull over paper work and evidence and information and anything you could get your hands on.

You didn't mind it though. Sure it was exhausting and your mind never seemed to stray away from work but you felt like you were doing something. You technically could go to your apartment all alone and get some sleep or maybe eat a proper meal but that felt ridiculous. Why bother with such menial things when you had much more important things at hand?

Also, it meant you weren't alone anymore. You had started spending nights at the office before Javier had and you can't remember when he joined in but you didn't mind. Javier and you had worked long enough that you had gotten used to his annoying, bothersome characteristics. He was hot-headed and flirtatious and sometimes incredibly hard to read but he was good at his job and he genuinely cared, which was more than you could say for a lot of other people working here. You two also worked well together. It was probably a natural result of working together for long enough, though you knew there were some people who had known Peña for longer than you had and could barely work with the guy.

Some people said you worked well together because you slept together and perhaps that was a natural assumption given Javier's reputation with women and the flirtatious quips he would send your way every once in a while. And while you had confirmed that wasn't the case, people liked to gossiped. But really you just worked well with the guys because you both had respect for each other and were what you would consider friends. You could share a drink with the guy and crack a joke at his expense. You could also mull over paperwork into the late hours of the night and go over countless theories and ideas with him, all of which he listened to and never tried to overshadow you.

"Drink this."

You looked up from your desk to see Javier holding a cup of coffee out, the brown liquid steaming and exuding a scent that alone seemed to wake you up. Your greedy fingers snatched the cup up, taking a big gulp of it before sending a small smile to the man who still stood in front of your desk. "Thanks, Peña."

You had come to greatly appreciate Peña's presence during nights like these. He would bring you coffee, let you rant and ramble, and if you drifted off the sleep at your desk, he would sometimes lay his jacket over you as a makeshift blanket. You didn't have a lot of people who looked after you, having left your family behind in the states for the job. So having Javier do even the smallest thing like bring you a cup of coffee was something you were grateful for.

"Did I make it right this time?" Peña asked slyly, giving you a small smirk that you reciprocated. You swore it was on purpose, but something was always just a little off with your coffee. You had told him how you liked him, given him the exact number of scoops of sugar and amount of creamer. Yet for some reason the coffee would always be a little too sweet or wouldn't have enough creamer. You drank it anyways, because you weren't picky and weren't one to say no to even the shittiest cup of coffee. But now it had become a small joke between you two.

"Not enough sugar." you playfully responded, giving him a small chuckle.

Javier looked down at you and shifted in the spot he stood in before responded. "A coffee place would probably make it better."

You snorted, placing your cup down and taking a glance at the watch on your wrist. "I don't think any coffee place is open at 2 am on a Tuesday."

"Well then maybe sometime when you aren't working." Javier countered and you raised a singular eyebrow, cocking your head. He was acting odd. A little too odd.

You shook it off and decided to make a small joke. "Oh, you mean when I'm dead?"

Javier sighed, brushing his hand through his hair before planting both of his hands onto your desk, leaning forward slightly. "I mean maybe sometime when you aren't working...and neither am I. Then I can buy you a coffee to make up for the shit stuff I make."

Your face dropped instantly as you looked up at Peña, seeing the way his eyes wouldn't make their ways to look into yours. You had known Peña long enough to know he wasn't a nervous man, especially not with you or women in general. In fact, sometimes he was too cocky for his own good. "Holy shit." you muttered.

Javier finally looked at you and raised an eyebrow at your shocked expression. "What?"

"Are you asking me on a date?" you dumbly said, not even trying to stop your mouth from saying the question in your mind.

Javier's tongue peeked out as he licked at his lips nervously, hands slipping away from your desk and landing on his hips as he straightened up. "Yeah. I am."

Holy shit. You were dumbfounded, shocked, absolutely 1000% floored. Peña was a flirt and had said his fair share of words to you but you assumed that was just who he was. You had seen him do the same to plenty of other women around the office alone. Not once in your head had the thought of Peña ever asking you on a date even crossed your mind. It seemed like a down right impossibility. He wasn't a 'go on a coffee date' type of guy. He was the 'stop at a brothel and have mindless sex with a woman whose name I barely know' type of guy. You couldn't even begin to imagine Peña on a date. The mere thought of him sitting with a woman at a coffee shop and making that small talk everybody had at a date and then driving them home made you nearly laugh in surprise. While you had come to appreciate the quirks of Peñas personality, he was an asshole normally and everything happening right now was so bizaree. His nervousness and the way his eyes were avoiding yours and asking you on a date?

"This is a joke, right?" you asked.

Javier let out a small chuckle, but not his usually one. This sounded uncomfortable and strangled. "Way to soften the blow, hermosa." he tried to respond as sarcastically as possible but you saw in between the cracks.

"You are serious?"

"Why do you sound so surprised?" Peña asked, a hint of annoyance peaking through as he examined your astonished figure.

You let out an odd laugh of your own, even snorting. You couldn't comprehend how he didn't understand how bizarre this was. Or maybe he did and just wanted to hear it from your mouth. "Peña, you just asked a woman on a date."

"And apparently did a shit job at it." Peña countered back, the wrinkles on his forehead more apparent as he scrunched his brows together.

"When was the last time you even asked a woman on a date?" you inquired.

"Why does this matter?" Peña asked, one hand being thrown up in confusion before landing back on his hip.

"Because never once in my days did I think I would see the day Javier Peña asked a woman on a date." You couldn't help the giggle that left your lips, partially because you were uncomfortable and didn't know what to do but also because this whole situation seemed like some kind of fever dream.

"Glad this is so funny to you." Peña scowled, turning back to his desk.

You bit your lip, trying to think of something to say. "You did a pretty good job actually. Good transition with the coffee and stuff." you offered, trying to lighten the mood and tension in the room.

"Then why didn't you say yes?" Javier asked, turning back to you as he sat on the edge of his desk.

You paused. You didn't say yes initially because you were too shocked to but there were probably a million reasons to not say yes.

You weren't dumb. Javier Peña was stupidly attractive. It was no wonder ever woman swooned over him. And the hair and slightly unbuttoned shirts certainly didn't help. And while many women would probably jump at the chance of a date with the infamous DEA agent just based off looks alone (and his 'sex god' reputation), you had come to admire the other things about him. His dedication and his how no matter how hard he tried to hide it, his compassion somehow always came through. There was plenty to admire about the man.

But there were also so many things that made a date with Javier Peña potentially a very bad idea. He was your co-worker first of all and while you weren't sure if it was necessarily forbidden, it wasn't something you should jump into. Being in this field was hard enough, you didn't need everybody thinking you had gotten where you were because you were jumping the bones of your co-workers. There was also the fact that Javier was the exact opposite of a relationship man. He was practically the epitome of a bachelor. His primary hobbies consisted of drinking and visiting brothels, blowing off steam with a woman withering under him. He was also so closed off sometimes. He kept everything so buried and so hidden and it was impossible to reach him.

"You do realize what a date is, right?" you asked gently.

Javier rolled his eyes. "Believe it or not, but I am very aware."

"And that you are asking me on a date. A date where we would go get coffee in a public place and talk and the main goal shouldn't be to get me in bed afterwards."

"Jesus Christ! I'm not trying to sleep with you!" Peña cried out, throwing his hands up.

"Well, excuse me but you have quite the reputation for being a bit of a man-whore asshole!" you shouted back, feeling the emotion and tension bubble up in you.

Peña dropped his head, looking down at his feet and letting out a long, drawn-out sigh. "I have... feelings for you."

He seemed to say the words begrudgingly, like there was anything he would rather do than have to talk about his feelings after practically getting rejected by a woman who he asked on a date (which he hadn't done in years).

Your mouth kept opening and closing, trying to conjure something to say but finding yourself unable to. if you thought the idea of Javier asking someone on a date unfathomable, then you were just absolutely flabbergasted by the idea of Javier having a crush on someone. You finally closed your eyes and took in a deep breath. "I don't...understand."

"I thought it was pretty obvious." Peña responded, shrugging his shoulders slightly as he slowly looked up at you.

You stared back into his brown eyes and let out an exhausted snigger. "No, it wasn't. Hence my reaction."

Peña pushed himself off his desk, strolling towards your desk and looking down at where you still sat. His brown eyes looked softer than you had ever seen them and it made the breathe in your throat hitch. "Listen, I am an asshole-"

"You really know how to see yourself, Javier." You cursed yourself for your habit of making jokes when you were uncomfortable as Javier looked back at you plainly. "Sorry..."

"I don't want to be an asshole when I am around you. I want to be better... for you. You make me think maybe I could be an okay guy." Javier offered.

You tried to ignore the way your heart had begun racing and the way your skin seemed to heat up slightly. You placed both your hands on the arm of your chair, trying to keep them busy so you didn't nervously twiddle your thumbs. "Alright, well that was kind of sweet in a weird way..."

Javier finally let out a small chuckle and you smiled at the noise, glad to feel a bit of the tension dissipate. "I know I'm a piece of shit and not boyfriend material or anything like that but... just one date. Let me buy you a cup of coffee."

You felt the corner of your lip quirk up into a small smile. "I'm not sleeping with you no matter how charming you are."

"We will save that for the third date then." Javier joked and you let out a small gasp.

"Bold of you to assume we will make it to a third date." You jested, giving him a teasing grin.

"It took me months to finally ask you out so this better work for me."

You leaned back. "Months?"

"Shut up." Javier huffed back as soon as he saw the smile on your face.

"Has the Javier Peña been pining for me for months?" You meant it as a joke but when his face softened and he looked back at you, you tried your best to wipe the smile off your face.

"It's... been awhile." Javier looked at the way you expectantly looked back at him and sighed. "Since the Christmas party."

Your jaw dropped. Steve had insisted on inviting you and Javier to what he described as a Christmas party Connie had set up but when you showed up, it was just the four of you. Murphy joked around, saying he didn't have many friends. But you didn't mind. It was one of the first times you had seen Peña out of the office and he seemed relatively relaxed for the first time you had seen him. You had both sat on the same couch together, across from the Murphys and every once in a while you two would whisper teasing jokes to each other about Steve. You thought back to the night and remembered how he had insisted on pouring your drinks for you and had probably been sat a little too close, his thigh nearly grazing yours. How his gaze had lingered on yours because it was the first time he had seen you wear something other than office clothes and shit, how did you somehow look even better? How he had insisted on driving you home once he realized you had walked there, saying it was because you shouldn't be walking around in the dark but also because he just wanted to spend more time with you, even if it was only a few more minutes.

"Javier, that was months ago."

Javier slowly nodded. "Yeah. I tried to at your birthday dinner."

That had been another thing that had been planned by Connie and Murphy had required you guys come to. You honestly didn't even know they knew when your birthday was, never once mentioning it because birthdays weren't your thing. But Murphy had somehow found out but you didn't mind. It was only a dinner with you four and some drinks, no big party and nobody made a big deal with it. The Murphy's had bought you a present despite you saying you hated receiving gifts.

Once again, Javier had insisted on driving you home and this time walked you to your door. You thought that would be it until he handed you a gift. Your watch had been broken and you needed a new one but had been too busy to get one so Javier had taken the liberty of doing so. You remember him insisting you open it when he was gone and not thank him for it. He had seemed a little off that day but you had thought it was just the drinks getting to him a little. He lingered and you both spoke about work until he eventually drifted away.

"Holy shit, Peña." you muttered, feeling the weight of the watch on your wrist even more.

"It doesn't matter." he huffed.

"It does to me." you softly said. Javier only sent a small glance your way and you gave him a smile before turning back down to your paperwork. "Pick me up on Friday."

You didn't look up to see the smile on Javier's face as he made his way back to his desk. "Yes ma'am."

[navegandoaciegas]

You think Lee would seize the chance when his wife's niece (not his side of the family) comes to visit? He's never met her, since the family moved out of knockemstiff many years ago. I mean, that beautiful, 21-year-old would look magnificent coming around his fat cock right? It's all he can think about, especially since his wife won't touch him anymore. And that perfect young thing is right under his roof.

changed it to friend’s daughter bc i checked and what you asked for is incest by marriage (at least in my country)

Married men do it better

Summary: You heard from your roommate that no one does it better than married men in their 40s, and you decide to test out her theories on your dad’s best friend (smut, explicit language, typos probably)

You looked like shit under the bright mirror lights of the bathroom, drenched in sweat and sleep deprived. The faucet twisted with a squeak, and you relished in the cold water that soothed your burning cheeks, neck and chest.

The night was restless, like most were when you spent them someplace other than your home or your dorm. You’d tossed and turned for hours in the single bed that the Bodeckers have provided you with, in the room that had been designed to be their child’s but had stayed barren. Then you’d gotten up, and tiptoed to the bathroom, careful not to wake Mrs Bodecker next door or your parents in the guest room downstairs.

You splashed more water on you, sighing in satisfaction. Blindly grabbing a towel on the rack next to you, you patted your face dry, standing straight.

And when you opened your eyes, another pair looked back at you in the mirror.

You jumped in suprise, but the scream that threatened to rip out of your throat was silenced by his rough hand clamping shut your mouth. You still bumped against the sink, rattiling the products on it, but luckily none of them fell to the linoleum floor.

Lee Bodecker stood behind you, so close that for a brief moment you wondered how you hadn’t sensed his presence before.

You knew he’d come look for you, for your sweet words and warm body, like he had all nights since you’d stayed at his place. You’d felt bold, that first night, and palmed his cock through his work uniform while your parents and his wife chatted in the kitchen.

It was easy, riling up a man who hadn’t been touched by his wife in years and hadn’t felt affection or sweet nothings whispered in his ears in even longer. And to be honest, he hadn’t put up much of a fight, too enamored with you, a young, sweet thing, all doe eyed and pouty lips.

You’d heard from your roommate that no one did it better than married men in their forties.

Those frat boys you both fooled around with didn’t even come close, and she’d slept with an older gentleman already, and you couldn’t let her be too smug about the fact that you hadn’t.

You’d have to try it too, and tell her all about it when you’d go back to Denver in August.

Until August, though, you’d let Lee Bodecker have his way with you all night, every night.

“Hush, baby girl,” he chuckled in your ear, eyes boring in yours through the mirror, “don’t wanna go wakin’ daddy dearest, hm? He’d kill us both.”

You shook your head, and giggled in his hand, pressing yourself flush against his chest. His belly was soft and pliant on your back, and underneath it you could feel his thick cock, already hard for you.

He groaned, and tightened the grip on your sides. “Already so eager, you little minx.”

“Always eager for you, Sheriff,” you said in the most sensual voice you could muster.

He didn’t look like the boys on the Varsity team, with his chubby cheeks and double chin, but it didn’t matter to you. You liked men in all shapes and forms but something about Lee’s body made your pussy throb, and your thighs clench.

“Good girl,” he mumbled in your hair, nuzzling his face right behind your ear, “Do you want me, hm? You all hot and bothered thinking about my cock all night? Thinkin’bout how I make your pussy cry for me?”

A whimper almost escaped your lips, and you clenched your thighs, memories of all the things he’d done to you flooding your mind. He’d fucked you harsh, and then soft, and then he’s stuck a thumb in your ass, a place where you’d never though about sticking anything in, and then shoved his cock all up your tight rim.

It hadn’t hurt, surprisingly. Much less than losing your virginity with a dumb teen boy underneath the school’s bleachers.

He’d eaten you out like a starved man, had had you ride his face, and then he’d stuck his cock so far down your throat that you’d almost passed out.

You were a wrecked, sobbing, sticky mess after each encounter.

“Please Sheriff, need you inside me, need your big fuckin’ cock in my cunt.”

He smirked, one hand traveling up to your breast, the other roaming down your thigh. “You got a mouth on you, darl’. Dirty little mouth on a dirty little slut like you,” he hummed, smiling against your skin.

His hands were rough and calloused, and they left shivers behind as they grazed you with gentle touches you wouldn’t expect from a man so big and harsh.

He touched you like you were made of the finest china, and sometimes when your mind wasn’t clouded by lust, you felt sorry for him. You pitied him, all alone in a cold house with a distant wife that you suspected was seeing other men behind his back and that made him sleep on the couch most nights.

You closed your eyes, shoving your bleeding heart in a corner of your mind, focusing on how good his hands felt as the pinched your nipples, how pleasant his lips were on your pulse point.

He bunched your drenched nightgown at your waist, growling when he noticed you weren’t wearing any undergarments. He dipped his fingers in your glistening folds, finding you soaked, leaking for him.

“Always so wet for me, princess, all for me?” he whimpered, rubbing his aching cock on your ass, eyes squeezed shut.

“Only for you, Lee,” you whined, hips rolling against his lenght, desperate to feel him inside you, to have him fill you up with his fat cock.

He played with your clit, rubbing circles on it while he crouched around you and sucked one of your nipples in his mouth. You stared at the scene in the mirror, your body twisted around his, your tits spilling out of your nightgown, the golden band around his fourth finger gleaming in the light.

Your pussy clenched hard around nothing.

“Fuck,” you moaned, bucking your hips behind you to rub the flesh of your ass against his raging hard on, “I can’t wait Lee, I need ya inside me, now.”

Lee chuckled, shoving his pyjamas pants down his thighs, his big, leaking cock standing to attention.

“Won’t even lemme taste you, darl’? That eager, hm?”

“Please,” you whined, spreading your legs apart to give him better access.

He teased you, rubbing his tip through your folds, coating it in your arousal. He slowly pushed himself past your entrance, stretching you with his girth, sheathing himself inside you with a broken moan.

He stilled, giving you time to adjust as you panted and winced.

“God, you’re so fuckin’ big, I’ll never get used to this,” you breathed, slowly circling your hips.

His cock hit all the right spots inside you, sending jolts of electricity down your spine. You felt the pressure build slow but steady in your cunt, as he slowly dragged his cock in and out of your cunt, relishing in the way your walls gripped him.

He clamped a hand over your mouth, shutting your moans up, and kept hammering his hips against your ass, the slapping of the soft flesh of his belly against your back the only sounds in the room.

He hauled one of your legs over his forearm, spreading you even further for him. He hit a new angle, a new nerve that threatened to break the dam in you core.

He thrusted deep inside you, and you watched from the mirror the slow drag of his cock disappearing in and out of your swollen cunt.

He was sweaty and out of breath and judging from the pained look on his face was trying hard to will back his pleasure and his moans.

One wrong move, one loud sound, and you’d wake someone in the house, who’d come check on you. If they did, they’d Lee pounding into you and you enjoying it like the cockdrunk whore you were.

That’s what he liked to remind you, and you nodded, lost in pleasure, feeling the warmth and pressure in your cunt become unbearable.

“Fuck, I can feel you clamp down on me, princess. Wanna feel you cum baby, come all over my fuckin’ cock, I know you can do it.”

He doubled his efforts, rubbing your clit and pummelling inside you.

The thought that your parents could catch you made you dizzy, but the idea of his wife walking in on you pushed you over the edge.

You were glad for the hand on your mouth as you came, screams muffled. You gushed over the sink, and you both watched through lidded eyes the pressure in your cunt snap, knot unraveling, his cock slipping out of you with your release, just in time for him to paint your legs and the floor with his hot spurt.

You were both spent and satisfied, and you turned around, lazily throwing your arms aroud his neck. The kiss you shared was sweet and sated.

He tasted like lemon drops on your tongue.

You pulled back, adjusting the nightgown over your tits.

“My roommate was right,” you hummed, pecking his lips and brushing past him.

“About?” he questioned, brow quirking.

“Married men really do it better..”

He turned around to say something, anything really, but you were gone already, leaving behind the sweet scent of you hair and an enraptured Lee.

-

Sorry for the typos. I’m writing from my phone.

I hope you liked this. Please reblog and leave some feedback. I love reading your comments, and they’re my biggest motivation ⭐️❤️

[harmonizingsunsets]

Polin Week Day 4: Prompt - Jealousy

Touching A Live Wire

After dragging Colin by the arm through her and Eloise's flat with one hand, Penelope slams the door behind them with the other.

She folds her arms across her chest and looks him in the eye for the first time since they left her work party early. He'd looked apologetic, following her wordlessly to the car and remaining silent during the entire drive to the flat.  

"You have five seconds to apologize."

Colin sighs, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his palms. "Penelope, this is a misunderstanding."

"Five," she starts counting.

"I didn't mean to say it that loud!"

Penelope's lips curl further in anger. "Four."

"Wait, let me explain why I—."

"Three," she interrupts, tapping her foot loudly on the floor.

Colin tilts his head at her. "Pen, this is ridiculous."

"Two."

"Can't we just sit down and—." Pen opens her mouth, her lips forming the word one, but Colin looks alarmed and puts his hands out to stop her. "Fine, you're right. I'm sorry!"

Penelope breathes in relief. Despite the show she just put on, she didn't know what she would've done if she'd reached one. With Penelope's grade three students, she'd send them to the principal's office or write their names in the infraction book. But, Penelope didn't think those forms of punishment would've worked with Colin.

She moves her hands to her hips, pinning her gaze on him. "Sorry about what?"

"I'm sorry that I got a bit carried away."

"A bit carried away?" Penelope scoffs, causing him to flinch in guilt. "Colin, you yelled at my co-worker, "Penelope is too good for you," and then proceeded to knock over the punch bowl!"

"In my defense, whoever placed it there did a poor job. It was teetering on the edge of the table."

Penelope's jaw clenches. "I placed it on the table."

Colin's eyes go wide, adorably so, which she could appreciate more if she weren't so angry at him.

Well, she still does appreciate it a little. She's human, after all.

"Oh, then it was a lovely job!" Colin exclaims, trying to cover himself. "Perfect placement, angels in heaven would want you to be on punchbowl duty at every party."

"You think angels have parties?"

"No, of course not, but they host them. Can you imagine parties in heaven? Unlimited food, great entertainment, and you could dance with Pablo Picasso and Prince at the same time."

"You really think Picasso and Prince would run in the same social circles in—hey, don't distract me," she interrupts herself, pointing accusingly at him while biting back a grin. "I'm mad at you."

Colin takes a step forward, beginning to smirk. "Then why are you smiling?"

"It's an annoying side effect of being around you," Penelope explains grumpily. "But, I'm still angry."

Colin deflates. "I know. You  should be angry at me." He begins to pace, making Penelope worry that he's going to slip as she and Eloise just polished the floor yesterday. "I was way out of line. I shouldn't have yelled at your co-worker. It was disrespectful."

Penelope exhales, her anger beginning to fade, but confusion still causing her head to ache.

"I don't understand. Why did you yell that at him? And why did you spend the whole evening scowling at him and steering me away from him the entire time?"

Colin doesn't respond, looking down at his shoes. His behavior worries her, as Colin's never been one to avoid telling her something. His eyes are always open, full of honesty and understanding. But lately, they've been clouded.

The clouds are unsettling. Penelope misses the sun's warmth, and she can't take the chill anymore, especially because she doesn't know what prompted the weather change.

"You've been so unlike you the past few weeks," Penelope quickly says before she loses her nerve. "You've been off ever since he started working with me at the beginning of this month."

Colin shifts his feet. "No, I haven't."

"Yes, you have! Whenever I bring him up, you completely shut me out, you've avoided my attempts for you to meet him, and I caught you rolling your eyes when I was talking to him on the phone," she lists, furrowing her eyebrows. "What do you have against him?"

"Nothing."

"Colin, tell me."

He shrugs but with tense shoulders. "There's nothing to tell."

Penelope presses on, taking a step closer. "Obviously, you have something against him."

"No, I don't," he says, taking a step back.

She steps forward, feeling a rook on a chessboard that's slowly advancing on his pawn as he moves it backward one square at a time.

"Be honest."

"I am."

"No, you're not. I know you well enough to know when you're lying."

"Penelope…"

"Please, Colin, just tell me what's really got you so—."

"He's into you!" Colin blurts out.

Penelope freezes, her rook stopping one square before her victory.

Colin grimaces at himself, taking a deep breath as if his words knocked the wind out of him.

"What?"

"He's into you," Colin repeats, his voice quieter than before. "I don't like the way he looks at you. He obviously wants something more than friendship."

Penelope knows she shouldn't, but she laughs. "That's absurd."

Colin's expression drops even further, beginning to frown. "Why is that absurd? "

"Because it's me. Why would he be interested in me?"

"Why wouldn't he be?"

Penelope narrows her eyes at him. "Colin, don't play dumb."

"I'm not. You're the one that's playing dumb."

"Excuse me?"

"Pen, you're intelligent, beautiful, funny, and kind," Colin describes, slowly raising his hands and placing them on her arms. There's something in his eyes as he speaks so vehemently, a gleam that sends a thrill through her body. "You're the perfect package. Who wouldn't want you?"

Something in his words causes her to pause, reassessing the entire evening. Once she does, seeing a supercut of Colin's reactions towards her co-worker and his behavior around the two of them, her mind reaches one conclusion—a conclusion which quickens her heartbeat.

However, it also inspires a newfound sense of motivation to stop tiptoeing at the edge of the cliff she's been on for years.

But, she has to make sure Colin is truly standing on the same cliff as her before jumping.

Penelope swallows nervously. "Alright, let's say you're right and that I'm the perfect package—."

"You are."

"Ok, let's say that I am," Penelope agrees, taking a deep breath before crafting her following words. "So, why shouldn't he like me?"

"It's not that he shouldn't like you because, of course, he should. But—he shouldn't," Colin blabbers, getting a cute crinkle in between his brows as he struggles to explain himself adequately, which only fuels her wonderful but terrifying theory. "Because… he's—that guy is not right for you. "

Penelope inches closer, so her chest brushes against his body. He intakes a sharp breath, and she has to restrain herself from doing the same thing, knowing the gravity of this moment—of getting this exactly right.

"But I'm the perfect package, so I'm perfect for him, right?"

"No—I mean, yes, he'd be lucky to have you. But that doesn't mean you should be with him." His eyes flicker to her chest, and back up at her eyes, and back to his shoes, his face becoming more red with each passing second. "He—he has a horrible laugh, he likes Star Trek over Star Wars, and he took way more than his share of the cheese platter—."

"Those reasons are inconsequential. You know they are."

Colin opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. So, Penelope raises one of her hands, moving up his arm and to his neck.

The path of Penelope's fingertips creates a live wire, causing his skin to brim with electricity everywhere she touches.  But, it doesn't shock her. Instead, she's part of the electrical current and feels a hum of energy in her palm that his touch provides.

"So, there must be another reason you don't want me to be with him," Penelope continues, forcing her voice not to shake. "Right?"

"No," he shakes his head after a few beats.

She bites her lip, trying to hold on to hope. "Really, there's not one reason?"

"Um…no?"

Penelope sighs, dropping her hands from his neck, feeling stupid. How foolish was she to think ahead of herself like this? Clearly, Colin's answer was not what she predicted. Just like always, she got carried away in romantic notions, as she always seemed to, when Colin’s around.

"Ok," she says, clearing her throat. Colin frowns at the sudden distance, but Penelope can't see his expression as she's closing her eyes to try and banish the inclination to cry. "I know, it's been a long day, so let's forget it. I think I should—."

Penelope doesn't get to answer. Because, suddenly, Colin swoops forward, his hands cupping her cheeks and his lips crashing onto hers.

If touching his skin created a live wire, kissing Colin makes a high electricity voltage, one strong enough to power an entire city.

Colin's lips brush against her softly, but there's a desperate edge to it, one akin to the desperation she feels as she clutches the collar of his jacket and pulls him closer.

When Colin breaks apart for a breath, he rests his forehead on hers.

"I was jealous," he whispers.

Penelope pulls her head back a little so that she can meet his eyes. "What?"

"That's why I didn't want you to be with him, because I want you to be with me," Colin confesses, pursing his lips. "I know that's immature. I'm sorry. You should be with whoever you want to be with, even if it's not me. It's my fault that I was too much of a coward until—Ow!" He abruptly yelps, looking down at his arm, which Penelope just pinched. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing," Penelope ducks her head, the corners of her lips twitching into a smile. "I was just checking to make sure you weren't an illusion."

Colin smiles in the incandescent way that made Penelope fall in love with him in the first place. He tips her chin up, forcing her to meet his bright eyes filled with an emotion that wraps around her heart and squeezes it.

"I'm real, I'm very much real," Colin assures, his thumb skimming her cheek. "I'll prove it to you."

He closes the distance between them again. But, Penelope is the one to deepen the kiss. She feels a wave of heat run through her at Colin's moan. Also, she experiences a surge of confidence, proud that she was the one to elicit such a glorious sound.

Penelope wraps her arms around her neck, finding it slightly annoying that he's so tall, as she has to lean up on her toes to kiss him. Colin must sense her struggle, quickly amending the issue by swiftly raising her into the air.

But, as her legs sweep up as she's taken into his arms, she accidentally kicks the bowl that holds her and Eloise's apartment keys off of the table.

It crashes loudly onto the floor, the ceramic breaking into multiple tiny pieces.

Colin and Penelope's lips break from each other's, looking down at the mess near her feet. Then, for a moment, neither of them say anything, only staring at the floor.

"Well…at least there was no punch in there this time," Colin says, sidestepping the broken pieces of the bowl.

Penelope laughs, smiling against his lips as she pulls him in for another kiss.

While she has a lot of explaining to do about the dramatic scene the two of them caused when she shows up at work tomorrow and will have to answer Eloise about the broken bowl, she can't find it in herself to care.

When he opens his eyes briefly, looking at her and moving a strand of hair behind her ear, she no longer sees clouds. Instead, she only sees the sun, and she wants to bask in its glow forever.

Penelope knows how idealistic that thought is, but as Colin begins kissing down her neck after moving them to the couch, she thinks it's quite a reasonable notion.

[jiminrings]

hi hannah !! can i request a drabble where jungkook visits florist!y/n and he went “hi i’m here to get a flower for my girlfriend” and the girlfriend is y/n. i’m sorry if it doesn’t make sense 😭 love u <3

full blooms

love u too bestie <3

aka jungkook really should’ve thought this through!!

...... oh no

there are so many people in the shop

not just any shop though :D

sometimes you collectively forget that this is yOUR shop and you’re the literal owner of it and you’re not just working it

and sometimes, you forget just how influential things could be

case in point: kim taehyung !!

kim taehyung as in the hottest musician in the scene rn, who happens to be vante on spotify, AND someone who you just happen to know as kim taehyung!!!

kim taehyung as in the friendly customer who comes into your shop more oftenly to look at your flowers than to buy them

and you just let him look at them without buying anything because there’s no harm in it!! the guy is just straight-up Vibing looking at the flowers

(and he also leaves a handsome tip in your jar even when he doesn’t buy anything!!)

you just knew him to be that pleasant customer,,, not exactly a world-renowned musician you couldn’t exactly piece together

but apparently, you’re now more aware than ever lmao

taehyung sneaked in the name of your flower shop somewhere into the lyrics of the mOST famous song from his newly-released album

flowers from spring day on my mind, corner of the street with the neon sign, heaven on my mind and i spent no dime

goddamn

it just so happens that you letting THEE vante look at flowers as he pleases has become his favorite routine and it just makes him so happy in general

so happy to the point that your shop is specifically mentioned

— so, so happy to the point that your shop had become fully-packed and was making single-file lines that stretched all across four blocks overnight

so sO happy to the point that he had unknowingly become a catalyst for your shop to be almost fined because so many people were clogging sidewalks and a warning to get it together so that there would be better organization

YOUR SHOP WAS LITERALLY FEATURED ON THE NEWS?????

anyways, taehyung slipped in from the staffroom you mentioned to him in passing two days after he dropped his album, and then could you properly freak out about him

he was giggly the whole time when you were spouting out your disbelief for him but tHEN he also apologized for all the (positive & money-making) trouble he’s gotten you into

and he managed to sales-talk you (u swear u are the boss here) into collaborating with him for a limited collection with all the favorite flowers he’s taken note of so he could share it with his fans

he even brought you a notebook with all the illustrations and ideas he’s conceptualized so yeah,,,, there’s that

not only do you serve more than a full house in your flower shop and spend much more hours and energy, you’ve also agreed to add something big into your plate that’s easily getting crowded

what a good thing you have jungkook :D

you could literally not ask for a better boyfriend than jungkook

he’s been so supportive the whole time and he kept sHRIEKING when you casually told him that the frequent sight-seeing customer turned out to be vante himself

“all this time?! all this time and you fORGOT to mention to me that he wears a leather watch and a pearl necklace??? baby, those are basically his trademarks!!”

he supports you in ways you can’t even fathom <3

he was supposed to help you in the shop to help tackle the horde of vante-loving and flowers-from-spring-day enthusiasts, but he got an even better idea

he spent the whole week designing and building an online website for spring day from scratch!! he wanted it to be perfect for you and everything you stand by

also even him, a computer sciences graduate, had to back up the website extra nifty because he already predicts that it would get so much traffic (!!)

he took it upon himself to hire from his friends to be your helpers for the shop because ur severely under-staffed

he has tHREE more-than-willing candidates!!!

jimin’s summer job in college was him being a cashier in goddamn music festivals :D OF COURSE he’s gonna be the greatest cashier you’ll ever have!!! he can whip up change even before the customer hands the bills; he’s that good

he also has a great stern voice of making people stand in organized lines and not cut it so that would come handy

hoseok has a great instinct for color theory!!! he just knows what works and what doesn’t and you need an extra mind to help conceptualize arrangements in the blink of an eye

namjoon is a master of small talk and an all-rounder!! you have a loT of customers who have no gist whatsoever on what they want, and you don’t want to risk giving them an arrangement they loathe!! he knows how to hit it

he was actually so excited when jungkook pitched him a job offer

he could literally go “y/n, the lady in yellow has a dalmatian. i could tell she would tulips in her arrangement along with hydrangeas.”

so that’s that, basically

you and jungkook have been hectic and apart for a whole week because you practically sleep in the shop trying to keep up with everything

he’s actually keeping the website and sneaky hires from you as secrets in the meantime because he wants to surprise you!!! like literally right now

he enters from the staffroom and make sure none of the people waiting by the entrance see him because that would be utter chaos

the shutters are all closed so no one from outside can see what’s inside, but you actually fAIL to realize that your shop would still be closed for another ten minutes

the moment you hear a voice, your mind automatically goes to “hi! welcome to spring day. what blooms would you like?” mode :|

jungkook frowns because you look so haggard under his trained eye even if you still look well-kempt!! you can’t have your shops and yourself appear ratty in the eager instagram stories that taehyung’s fans take

but that’s okay!!! he’ll coax you to come home with him tonight because he’s gonna tell you about his hires this morning

“hi! welcome to spring day. what blooms would you like?”

you briefly look up to send a smile, already fetching your paper on your left hand and twine and scissors on the other

“hi! i’m here to get flowers for my girlfriend.”

“that sounds lovely. what would you-“

wait

hold on a second

that’s jungkook’s voice....??

that’s your bOYFRIEND’S VOICE???

“j-jungkook?”

you mutter and the boy beams in return, registering the blank look on your face to be surprise instead of what you’re thinking

the tears suddenly pool at the corner of your eyes even before you realize

“is this your way of breaking up with me?”

...

.....

“what? nO!”

your shoulders visibly sag in relief but jungkook’s clearly perplexed on how you even came to that

“why would i ever be dumb enough to break up with you?” he immediately consoles you when you bury your face in your hands, hopping over the counter to put you in a massive hug

“i-i haven’t slept, dummy!! and i figured that you hate me because we haven’t seen each other for a week and-“

you say in between sobs and chuckles, giggling when your cheeks are smushed and jungkook keeps peppering you with wet kisses

“ten minutes before opening,” kook sweetly reminds you, kissing you on the lips after an entire week that the sheer euphoria he’s getting now is enough to last another

“mhmmm,” you hum when he presses his warm hand on the small of your back, “tell me about your week in ten minutes.”

“sounds good,” he affirms, scratching your scalp that makes you relax even more until he stops red-faced —

“but like, while multitasking, y’know? kiss me while i tell you about my week.”

[chocolatecakecas]

Expect the Unexpected: dadstiel father's day ficlet

based off this anon's genius ask

They were late. Not that they actually had a strict schedule to stick to, but when it came to hunts, Claire didn't like to mess around. She did take this very seriously after all.

But the drive took longer than expected and they didn't get to the motel until around three am, and it took them longer to get out of bed this morning, which was admittedly Claire's fault. And they forgot to steam out their suits with the bathroom shower, so now they're late, in slightly wrinkled suits, speed walking through the parking lot at almost ten thirty am. And yeah maybe Claire's freaking out a bit, but what if the messy suits give them away, or what if another hunter got here already? Maybe they should run? The parking lot is empty so it's not lik-

"Hey, slow down, I don't think they bodies are going anywhere" Kaia laughed, gently grabbing Claire's hand to pull her back.

"I know, but we said we'd get there by nine thirty an-"

"Claire. The case isn't gonna disappear if we're forty five minutes later than we wanted to be. Okay?" Kaia assured, as she forced Claire to stop walking for a moment.

God why did she always have to be right?

"I know I know it's jus-okay fine" Claire sighed in defeat, but Kaia rewarded her with a quick peck on the lips, and pulled her inside.

They both flashed their badges with practiced confidence, and were easily lead to the correct room. The secretary didn't even bat an eye at their slightly wrinkled suits.

Yeah so maybe Claire was freaking out for noth-

"Agent Joel, and this is my partner Agent Cyrus"

Fuck. There's no way

(read rest under the cut)

"Clai-"

"Agents. I didn't know you were also assigned this case"

Because standing over the dead body on the examining table, was Castiel and Jack, in that ratty trench coat and a too big suit respectively.

Well, apparently another hunter did beat them to the case.

"Uh could you give us a moment to confer?" Cas asked attempting to hide his surprise, and the coroner nodded and left without a word.

"Claire! Kaia! I didn't know you guys were working the case too!" Jack started surprised, running over to give each of them a quick hug. They had met a ton of times over the past year, sometimes he even came and hung out at Jody's. And after the initial shock of Cas having a three year old who looked like he was twenty, Claire honestly liked the kid.

"Hey Jack, Cas. We didn't know you guys would be here either? I guess wires got crossed or something?" Kaia shrugged as she gave a little wave to Cas. But before Claire could say anything, Jack was tugging Kaia off to the side, talking a mile a minute about god knows what. And Cas was making his way, over to Claire.

"Hello Claire. I'm sorry I had no idea you two would be working this case. Jacks just been begging to go on another hunt, and this was the closest one to the Bunker. But we can try to find a diff-"

"Nono it's not a big deal. We can just find a different case. It wouldn't be fair, since the kid seems pretty excited about it" Claire said trying to shrug it off.

It's not like she was emotionally attached to this particular case, but it's been a while since her and Kaia had been on a hunt alone. So yeah maybe she was looking forward to it, bu-

"Well, maybe we could all work the case together? That is, if you'd want to?" Cas offered with a slightly nervous smile.

Okay so, it's not that Claire doesn't like Cas, she's seen him a lot over the years, they text and talk all the time, and he's been there for her a lot lately. Claire actually really likes the guy, but it's not like she's gonna tell him that, but it's just-Cas always treats her like she's the same naive teenager she was when they met again six years ago. And she's grown and learned a lot, she's a professional hunter now. At least Dean, and hell even Jody, gets that, they see the changes, but Cas.....

Claire glances over his shoulder to see Jack and Kaia laughing as to themselves, and she feels something pull in her chest as she quickly looks back to Cas.

Damnit.

"Uh sure, could be fun I guess? Besides we haven't seen you or the kid in the a while, but you have to explain why there's four FBI agents working this single murder case" Claire asserts, but Cas smiles brightly anyway.

"Deal" Cas agrees with a little tip of his head. God what a fucking dork, Claire thinks with a fond eyeroll.

“Also, Joel and Cyrus, really?” Claire teased as she walked over to join Kaia and Jack.

“I let Jack pick them out, and he insisted on picking our favorite singers” Cas sighed fondly, causing Claire to tip her head back in laughter.

And just like that the Coroner came back in, and they each took turns asking the routine questions, Jack with maybe too bright of a smile on his face. The guy was twenty-five, and his friends dared him to spend a night alone in this local old house that was apparently, haunted for real. And when his friends went to pick him up in the morning, they found him bleeding out in the foyer, with giant gashes all over.

So they decided to check out the house first, where Kaia and Jack both got tossed across the room by some creepy looking guy with a giant meat cleaver. Which basically confirmed Claire's theory of it being vengeful spirit, and they went back to Cas and Jack's room to research who the guy might be. So simple salt and burn.

And overall, things were actually going really great, Claire got to spend time with Kaia, plus she got to see Jack and Cas and share some laughs doing what she loves. She also got to help Cas show Jack some of the ropes, give him some hunting tips, which was awesome, since she's never gotten to be the teacher in this situation.

"Alright so tonight, why don't Kaia and I check out the house to make sure it's really gone, while Jack and Cas go find the guys grave?" Claire suggested as she stole a french fry off of Kaia's plate, who hummed in agreement

"Oh we get to burn the bones? I've only gotten to do that once before!" Jack began loudly, but quickly changed to a whisper after a warning look from Cas, they were in a crowded diner after all.

But the only one who hadn't spoken was Cas, who's face was scrunched up in thought.

"Claire I'm not sure splitting up is the best idea" Cas supplied carefully, which made Claire roll her eyes in annoyance.

God there he goes again, acting like Claire's some dumb kid. As if she hasn't handled herself just fine for years.

"C'mon Cas, me and Kaia hunt alone all the time, hell I've even done a ton of solo hunts. It'll be more effective this way, you burn the bones, and if it doesn't work we'll know immediately and figure out another way to waste the guy" Claire continued and watched as Cas looked from Jack to Kaia and back to Claire, sighing in defeat.

"Okay, but we'll all stay on the phone in case burning the bones doesn't work" Cas bargained, which Claire assumed was fair, and they all went back to eating happily.

So they split up, Claire and Kaia set up a salt line in the foyer, rock salt guns loaded and ready to go, with Cas and Jack on speaker at the cemetery. But of course, torching the bones didn't work. So now they had a pissed off, homicidal spirit chasing them with a giant meat cleaver, as Claire and Kaia raced around the house looking for the object it might be attached too while Jack and Cas yelled through the phone.

So yeah things were going pretty great actually.

Until they weren't.

"Cas I had it handled, I didn't need-"

"Claire I know, but it already sliced your arm and it was lunging right at yo-"

"But I was fine. I can take care of mys-"

"Claire, I know that-and please stop throwing your arm around you're going to reopen the wound-Claire, I was only trying to pro-"

"Well I didn't ask you to, I didn't ask you for any of this. I'm not some dumb little kid. I've been doing this for years, and I'm good at what I do, I can handle some stupid spirit. And I certainly don't need you to protect me from anything, since you did a pretty shit job of that already" Claire shouted, turning to look at him.

And when she caught sight of his wide, ashamed eyes, she felt something drop deep in her stomach, all of the fight draining out of her.

"Cas no I didn-I just-" Claire groaned running her hands through her hair, daring a glance over at Jack and Kaia who were frozen on the bed, looking at her with a hint of sympathy in their eyes. Her eyes darted back to Cas who's looked the same, except they were mostly filled with guilt.

Great. Just fucking great.

"Ya know what, I'm gonna run to the drug store-get some more bandaids. I'll be back" Claire huffed slamming the door behind her, and trudging across the motel parking lot to her car.

As she walked into the drug store, her mind was racing, rage still burning away in her stomach, and she mindlessly examined each box of bandaids.

This was stupid. The hunt was over, the guy was dead, turns out his murder weapon was the obejct they had to destroy. So it doesn't even matter anymore, but Claire's just so-

She tossed a box of bandaids back on the shelf. Maybe she should have just let Cas heal-no. Just another thing Claire thinks he needs to do for her.

And where does Cas get off trying to assume what's best for her? She can handle herself just fine, she's almost twenty four for gods sake. She's been hunting on her own for years now, and she's damn good at it, even Jody says so. She's grown and learned a lot so why can't Cas fucking just back off? And who the hell does Cas think he is, anyway? She doesn't need him to protect her, she doesn't need someone to save her, definitely not Cas of all peop-

With a huff Claire shoves another box back on the shelf, maybe a bit too aggressive and digs her palms into her eyes to ground herself.

What is she doing?

She forgave- or as close to forgiveness as you can get with this kinda thing- Cas a long time ago. She didn't wanna live with that rage and pain anymore, it was weighing her down and it fucking sucked. So she's made "peace" with it. And if she's really being honest, she really does like Cas a lot, he's like some doofy, powerful guy, who says some of the weirdest and funniest things she's ever heard. Plus, he sure as hell cares a lot, and he's tried to make it as "right", as possible and respected what Claire wanted. 

But just because Claire's made peace with it and thinks he's a good guy, doesn't mean she's not allowed to be pissed.

Claire quickly swipes a brand of bandaids and gauzes she's used before, and weaves her way through the aisles. But she catches something out of the corner of her eye that has her stopping in her tracks.

A Father's Day display.

Something drops deep in the pit of her stomach, as her heart leaps into her throat.

And she's instantly transported back to age five, with memories of homemade cards, barbeques in the backyard, and her dad with a bright smile as he carefully opened her gift. A new tie.

She feels her phone buzz in her pocket, effectively breaking her out of the trance. She quickly swipes at her eyes before reading it. 

It’s an apology from Cas.

Claire feels herself rubbing at her eyes again, the grief and pain of loss mixing with guilt and affection and confusion and anger all at once, struggling to gain dominance.

But before she can even process it all, another text come through, asking if she can grab some of Jack's favorite snacks, with way too many emojis.

And before she realizes it, a wet laugh escapes, as she squeezes the phone in her hand. She quickly glances back up at the display, a small, somber smile pulling at her lips.

And she makes a choice.

The next morning they’re all lingering in the parking lot before saying their goodbyes. Claire offered to check them all out, dragging Jack along before leaving Kaia and Cas alone.

"Here, you should be the one to give it to him" Claire says quickly stuffing a bag in Jack's hands.

"But it's from all of us?" Jack questioned, familiarly tilting his head, and Claire couldn't help but smile.

Last night Claire went back to the drugstore, now with Kaia and Jack in tow under the guise of picking up dinner. They each signed the card, even convincing Kaia to write something too. Jack even insisted on getting him one of those cheesy #1 Dad mugs, because apparently even though Cas didn't need it, he liked to drink coffee.

"Yeah I know, but you picked out the mug. So you can give it to him later" Claire assured, and quickly stalked across the parking lot with Jack in tow.

Jack can just hide it in his backpack and give it to Cas when they get home, so he can read their messages in a place where Claire is preferably, not present.

But to Claire's horror, annoyance at her own self because she should have seen this coming, Jack immediately handed Cas the gift.

"Happy Father's Day! It's from all of us, I know it's early but I thought you should open it while we're all together!" Jack declared with a bright smile, while Kaia gently found and squeezed Claire's hand. Cas just looked over at Claire and Kaia, confusion swimming in his eyes

"We all picked it up from the drugstore when we went to grab dinner last night. Thought it might be nice" Kaia answered evenly, but Claire could tell she was nervous. She knew she was worried about how Kaia fit into this fam...well whatever it was.

Cas simply nodded as he worked to recover from his initial shock, he slowly pulled out the mug first, smiling as he read it.

"I picked out the mug! But Claire put the quotes around the Dad, she said you'd think it was funny" Jack informed him, which only caused Cas to chuckle warmly as he pulled out the card.

Claire thought her heart might hammer out of her chest as she leaned into Kaia's touch. Damnit, why couldn't the kid have just waited until he was home.

"Thank you. All of you, thi-this means so much" Cas choked out, voice thick as he finished reading with a disbelieving smile. He hugged Jack first, pressing a kiss to his head.

"See, he loved it? You should talk to him" Kaia suggested in a no nonsense tone, pressing a kiss to Claire's lips before walking towards their car. Cas stopped her of course, wrapping her in a tight hug, and Kaia whispered something Claire couldn't make out, before she pulled Jack over to the other side of the lot. Claire looked at Cas, noticing his eyes were shining, and quickly looked at a rock on the ground as if it was the most interesting thing in the world.

"That was very kind of you. You didn't have to do all that for me" Cas said softly as he cautiously approached Claire, leaving some space between them.

"Yeah well, I don't know. I saw the cards at the store and I thought it might be nice..." Claire trailed off, braving another glance at Cas who's eyes were a little misty. Her eyes flitted to the side to see Kaia giving her an encouraging and a nod towards Cas, before turning back to Jack.

Well, it's now or never.

"Look Cas. I'm sorry I blew up yesterday, and I appreciate your-your apology. But I don't need you to protect me, you gotta know I'm not some dumb-"

"Claire, I know. You've become an incredible hunter, I'm not worried about your hunting skills or think that you need protecting. I just worry and want to protect you because I care about you" Cas stated sincerely.

Oh.

And yeah she knows Cas cared and she knows he was only trying to help, and maybe logically she knows that Cas was't acting like that because he thought she was a some inexperienced crap hunter. But hearing it is just-

Something warm swims in her stomach, as her heart thumps against her chest, as she swallows thickly.

"Listen, about the card, I- I know you aren't him, and you'll never be him okay? So you aren't my dad and I’m not looking to replace but-but you're kinda-you've kinda been like a Da-a figure lately and I know you said you care and I appreciate-and I car-I feel lik-"Claire attempted to choke out, but the next thing she knew, she's stopping and flinging her arms around his neck, hoping it'll convey everything she wants to say.

And it must, because Cas' arms wrap tightly around her, and she finds herself grabbing the back of that ratty trench coat, smiling to herself for a moment.

When they pulled away Cas gives her a soft smile, as she quickly wipes at her eyes.

"You and Kaia should come for dinner next Friday at the bunker. Deans texted me about it six times, and I'm sure Jack would love to show you his room....if you wanted that is-of course you don't hav-"

"Yeah Cas, that actually sounds kinda nice. Haven't had a chance to bother Dean in a while, anyway" Claire shrugged with a smile, which he easily returned.

And later as Claire drove back to Jody's, one hand on the wheel, the other loosely grasping Kaia's, she found herself really looking forward to next Friday.

Tag list:

Please let me know if you'd like to be added or removed💛

@wormstacheangel @smiledean @shelikestv @bichaoticdean @midnightwings-deancas @jellydeans @sunshine-jack @archervale @wikiangela @subbydean @organicpurplepants @you-cant-spell-subtext-without @writtendevastation

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[yourmidnightlover]

also.. fluff 10 and smut 5 maybe 😌

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: i LOVE fake dating.

fluff #10: fake dating

smut #5: first time (a classic)

CW: cursing, unprotected penetrative sex, fingering, oral (fem receiving), virgin!spencer, leaning towards dom!reader but not explicitly mentioned. *let me know if i’ve missed anhthing*

he needed something. something to make him seem less loser-y. he needed you.

spencer reid’s high school reunion was right around the corner. said high school reunion had all of the kids who would make fun of him, pick on him. the ones that stripped him naked on a pole. now he was 26 and in the bau for the fbi. he was successful. he made his mark. he saved lives.

but he still didn’t have a significant other. he didn’t have someone to come home to. he would have to go to his high school reunion with the knowledge that everyone was still more successful than him in the relationship aspect because he didn’t have that special someone.

“kid,” morgan intervened, “don’t let something like that make you not go to the reunion. you’re successful now. you’re pretty boy. that alone will rub it in their faces.”

“i know but everyone’s probably in a relationship now. they might even have kids and a wife or husband. i just... i want to seem like something to them,” he placed the lid on his coffee cup and began walking with morgan back to his desk.

“then ask someone to go with you. i know a little someone who wouldn’t mind posing as your girlfriend for a few nights,” morgan nudged his shoulder.

“morgan,” he rolled his eyes. “you know who i actually want to go with, which means you also know that she won’t want to go with me,” he finished explaining.

“y/n?” morgan whispered. “the girl who’s been fawning over you since she got here? the new liaison that’s been here for over a year that you still haven’t asked out?”

spencer turned his face to look at you through your office window. you were busy filing through cases, your head down in focus as you bit your lower lip while concentrating. your hair was crowding your face, obstructing the view of the beauty spencer has become mesmerized by.

“reeiidd,” morgan sang mockingly. “that just proves my theory. ask her out already.”

“i don’t want to ruin things, morgan,” he sighed as he sat down at his desk. “i wouldn’t even know how to ask her. i’ve barely kissed a girl, let alone ask one out.”

“you don’t have to ask her out, really,” he sat atop his desk. “just mention the situation and say she was the first person that came to mind, flatter her.”

“morgan, drop it,” spencer hissed as the bau filled a bit more.

“just ask her to go with you,” he said a bit louder.

“ask who to go where?” your voice rang through his ears, he liked up to see morgan smirking.

“uhm ask...” he ran his mind for another answer besides the truth.

“i know when you’re trying to come up with a lie, spence,” you chuckled.

“fine,” he sighed. “i wanted to ask if you’d mind going to my high school reunion with me?” he couldn’t meet your eyes.

“oh sure! that sounds fun,” you agreed. “why were you so nervous to ask?”

“well, you see,” he cleared his throat. “everyone in my class has a significant other and i just wanted to seem a bit less like a loser.”

“spencer you aren’t a loser,” you said sympathetically. “you save lives on a daily basis, you’re crazy smart, you have the sweetest personality, and you’re gorgeous. there’s nothing loser-y about you.”

“re-really?” he asked.

“of course, really,” you nodded, placing a hand on his shoulder. “and if you’d want me to pose as your girlfriend i’d be more than honored,” you added with a chuckle.

“thank you, y/n,” he smiled. “it-it means a lot to me.”

“of course. but for now,” you motioned to the files in your hand, “it’s case time.”

-

after a couple of months had passed, the reunion was finally upon the two of you. spencer had insisted on paying for your ticket to vegas because ‘he got you into this mess in the first place.’

you and spencer had to reserve one hotel room - courtesy of the school reunion. they just so happened to decide to allow the two of you to share one bed. it was reasonable, and cost efficient.

as the two of you entered the room, you were surprisingly caught off guard with not only the one bed in the room, but also with how nice the hotel room was. out on the balcony there was a jacuzzi that was covered by an awning. when you looked in the bathroom, there was a rather large tub and a separate shower adjacent to it.

“wow,” you awed. “this place is really nice.”

“i didn’t expect this,” he added. “i guess they saved the money from my actual high school years.”

you plopped down in the center of the bed, sighing as the soft mattress curved around your back, “i could really get used to this.”

“yea, me too,” he took the time to gawk at you as you seemed so peaceful, lying on the bed. “we uhm,” he cleared his throat, “we should probably start getting ready for tonight.”

“alright,” you groaned, slowly sitting up to prepare for the evening.

-

walking into his old high school, spencer felt a wave of nostalgia mixed with bile rising in his throat. this place was absolute hell for him. he was teased, ridiculed, practically tortured for being special.

“hey,” you squeezed his arm, which yours was wrapped around. “you’ve got this, spence. you aren’t the same defenseless kid you were back then,” you stopped him in the middle of the hallway and placed your hands on his shoulders, gently massaging them. “you are a successful adult with an amazing job and friends to support you. plus, you have a really hot girlfriend by your side,” you both chuckled at that.

“thank you,” he took a deep breath. “thank you for being here.”

“it’s my honor,” you placed your arm in the crook of his once more. “shall we?”

“we shall,” he smiled as you entered the gymnasium of his old high school.

spencer tried his best to avoid any glances or possible stares. it was nerve wracking, being here with his previous bullies. granted, with you by his side he was far less worried.

you had found a group of people he used to hang out with. he was never close with people in high school, but these kids at least didn’t make fun of him. they were all proud to see that the former child prodigy is now using his gifts for the betterment of their country. you had even seen his old math teacher that took a liking for him many years ago.

“spencer?” he heard a very familiar, chill-inducing voice. he looked up to see none other than her.

alexa lisbon.

“spencer,” she chuckled. “it’s me, alexa.”

he felt your grip on him tighten, reasonably so since you knew about what had happened.

“h-hi,” he stuttered out.

alexa wasn’t as beautiful as she was in high school. it’s true what they say about those who peek in high school, he presumes.

“how’ve you been? i heard you work for the fbi now?” she placed a hand on his shoulder, which he resisted swatting away.

“yup. the behavioral analysis unit,” he looked at you before wrapping his arm around your shoulder. “i actually met her there, at work.”

“...her? are you two...?” she retracted her hand from his shoulder as you curled into his chest.

luckily, you two had already worked out the kinks of your “relationship.” where you met, first date, how long, everything was figured out.

“yes. for six months now, actually,” he smiled and looked down at you. “it’s been an amazing time with her. i wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. i love you.”

“i love you too, sweetie,” you gave him a chaste peck on the cheek, noticing his blush once you retreated.

“well, that’s... nice,” she almost grimaced as she gazed over you. “how did he manage to get a girl like you?”

“like me?” you asked for clarification.

“y’know... beautiful?” she lent in towards you as if spencer wouldn’t be able to hear what she had said.

“excuse you?” you scoffed.

“you heard me,” she rolled her eyes.

“no, i heard you. i was just wanting to give you the chance to realize how incredibly dumb you sounded, but apparently you truly are just that. dumb,” you placed a hand on spencer’s chest protectively. “this is one of the strongest, smartest, and most brave men i’ve ever met. he protects our country every day by using his own intelligence, something you clearly lack. so next time you ever think about insulting him or me, i suggest you ask yourself whether or not your even deserving of talking to him.”

“i-i just-“

“just nothing,” you interrupted. “how about you go and annoy someone else with your lack of brain cells?” and she walked away with a roll of her eyes.

“i can’t believe her,” you scoffed, turning around to look directly at spencer.

“you uhm, you didn’t have to stand up for me like that,” he whispered.

“i wanted to,” you wrapped your arms around his torso. “she’s a bitch and it seemed like nobody has ever put her in her place. i’m glad i got the honor to do so,” you gloated.

“i know. but thank you,” he sighed, briefly looking over his shoulder. “i think she’s still looking.”

“do you trust me?” you placed your hands on the side of his face, drawing his attention to only you.

“always,” he nodded as you got on your tip-toes, gently pulling his face into your own.

he placed his hands hesitantly on your waist, helping to hoist you up to meet his own lips. it was better than he’d imagined - and boy, did he imagine this. you were gentle, and delicate but provided the passion that spencer shared with you, pulling his bottom lip between your own and gently nibbling it. he let one of his hands trail up your body, going to the back of your head to deepen the kiss. at this point, he had forgotten all about alexa and the other students at the reunion. it was just you and him.

“can we-“ you whispered softly to him, your forehead pressed against his, “can we get out of here?”

“please,” he breathed out as you grabbed his hand, pulling him back through the doors of the gymnasium to exit.

-

as soon as you opened the room, you were on each other. you nearly tore his jacket off of him as he worked on the dress you had worn. he wanted to take his time, to relish in this moment while it lasted, but his own eagerness betrayed him. he was far too excited to be able to slow down.

his hands roamed your body, pawing at the soft tissue of your breasts over your bra as you moaned into his mouth.

“take it off,” you sighed, allowing him to reach behind you and unclasp the clothing.

“fuck,” he awed upon seeing your bare chest, you giggled at his eagerness.

as he gawked at your chest, it was almost as if something had clicked in your mind. and he saw that it had.

“have you... done this before?” you asked, your hands moving down to his shoulders.

“like am i a... a virgin?” he bit his lower lip as he saw you nod. “... yes.”

it didn’t truly surprise you. he had never had a long term girlfriend, and as a child prodigy sex was probably pushed to the back burner.

“are you sure you want your first time to be with me? i’m pretty sure it’s supposed to be special,” you smiled half heartedly.

“of course i want to do it with you. was your first time special?” he rebutted, maybe he knew it wasn’t special ahead of time.

“you deserve for yours to be, though,” you tried to reason.

“it will be if it’s with you, please,” he let his hands trail to your waist as he gave you his best puppy dog eyes, pleading for you to keep going.

“and you’re sure?”

“so sure,” he whispered, smiling before connecting your lips once more.

you were content with that answer. he felt your hands wound in his hair once more, gently tugging at the locks to elicit a groan from spencer. you slowly pushed him back to sit on the bed and straddled his hips, his hands still firm on your waist. clearly, he still wasn’t sure if he was allowed to touch. placing your hands atop his, you trailed them to the front of your body, stopping them once they reached your breasts. he looked up at you with eyes seeking approval, which you granted in the form of a nod. he leisurely took one of them into his mouth, your head rolling back in pleasure from the feeling. his hand continued to work on the opposite side, tweaking the nipple when he took it between his teeth.

“so good to me, spence,” you praised from his lap, slowly grinding against his bulge to seek any form of relief.

you were both getting more and more eager as the time passed, evident by the groans and whimpers that left each other’s mouths. because if this, you ran your hand down his front and let it remain over the bulge before gently stroking it.

“y/n...” he murmured. “please, i-i need...”

“need what, baby?” you asked with a smile. “need my mouth on you? need inside of me? tell me, sweet boy.”

“anything,” he decided to go with. “i need anything.”

“how about i just...” you got off of him to remove your pants before looking back at the man sitting before you. “care to even the playing field?”

“ri-right,” he chuckled before standing up to undo his belt and throw his pants off, followed by unbuttoning his shirt.

“so fucking pretty,” you walked closer to him and slid off your panties. “do you think i’m pretty, too?”

“i-i- of course, i do,” he reached for your waist hesitantly, eyeing your now bare pussy, his nerves not getting the better of him.

“yea?” you straddled him once more but this time pushed his torso down so he was lying on the bed.

he felt your hand trace his bulge that was still trapped inside of his boxers. the light touch was enough for him to whimper. he wanted nothing more than to make you feel good, but he was too mesmerized by the feeling of you.

“morgan has a point when he calls you pretty boy,” your lips were now happily decorating his neck. “i’ve never met a man who i can confidently call pretty, yet here you are.”

“plea-please,” his hips bucked up before you reached inside of his boxers, pulling him out of the fabric.

“before we keep going,” you paused for a moment. “i have condoms in my bag, but i’m clean and on the pill if you’d want to...”

“... not wear one?” you nodded your head. “i’m clearly clean, too. and i just - i really want to feel you.”

“perfect,” you chuckled. “let me do the work, baby,” you sat up temporarily, placing his dick just below your center. “you feel that? how wet i am?”

“yes, god, yes. i feel it,” his hips bucking forward allowed his dick to rub between your folds.

“that’s from you, my sweet boy. all you,” you ground your hips against his member once more, sending his head flying back from the friction.

“please,” he breathed out with obvious frustration. “i-i won’t last long if you keep going.”

“alright, i’ve got you,” you finally rose your hips, reaching between the two of you so you could line him up with your entrance before slowly sinking down on him.

“oh my god,” he whimpered. “you’re-you’re so tight and wet and - god.”

“does this feel as good for you?” you asked as you stayed stationary on his lap, trying to let him soak in this experience as much as he could.

“probably better, if i’m being honest,” he let his hands grip your hips with a bruising touch, too eager to realize his own strength.

“i doubt that,” slowly, you rose your hips before dropping them back down.

spencer’s hands found their way up to your chest, gently pawing at them with fascination. his hips began to meet yours as you picked up the pace.

“fuck, it feels so good,” he cried out, placing one arm around your waist so he could fuck you from beneath.

“ditto, pretty boy,” you groaned as his hips picked up the pace. “so fucking eager, baby. you feel so good inside of me. cum whenever you need to, baby. i want you to cum inside me.”

“fuck - i’m gonna - i-i-“ his hips thrusted up one more time before spurts of his cum filled you up. “oh, fuck!”

“oh, you did so good, sweet boy,” you stroked his hair as he fucked his cum into you, trying to ride out his orgasm. “so, so good.”

you continued to rub his shoulders and stroke his hair as he came down from his high.

“you didn’t come,” he whispered against your chest.

“it’s alright. i still enjoyed myself,” you smiled at the sentiment. “sex isn’t always about coming. it’s also about the intimacy.”

“but i wanted you to come, too,” he nearly whined. “can i... can i make you feel good, too?”

“how do you wanna do that sweet boy?” you wanted to hear him say it, that much was obvious.

“you know,” he turned his head on your chest, placing a chaste kiss on your breast.

“do i?” you tugged gently at his hair to hear him whimper once more.

“please, can i...” he lowered his voice to a whisper, “perform oral on you?”

“oh, i love it when you talk dirty to me, doctor reid,” you sighed with a soft chuckle. “of course you can.”

you lifted yourself off of him before he slowly rolled you over, kissing his way down your body to meet with your center. he placed a soft kiss to your clit before licking a broad stroke up your slit, cleaning up the mess he made inside of you.

“fuck, good boy,” he moaned at the praise, wanting to hear more and more every day.

and he worked for the praise. he lapped at your center and sucked lightly on your clit, quickly building the tension inside of your stomach. once he entered his finger, unprompted, you questioned how experienced he truly was. he curled the finger inside of you expertly, trying to find your g-spot and successfully doing so. it was only a few stroked from inside of you and sucking on your clit for a few more seconds when you came on his fingers, tugging on his hair and digging your nails into his shoulder.

“fuck, spencer!” you moaned out, throwing your head back as he worked you through your own high.

once you had come down, it took pulling spencer up by his shoulders for him to let up on your pussy. that man might’ve been made to eat a girl out.

“you did so fucking good, spence,” you praised before connecting your lips, gently sucking on his tongue.

“that was...” he trailed off, trying to think of the right word to describe it. “it was enticing,” he settled on.

“yea?” you chuckled against his lips.

“yea,” he smiled back before sucking your bottom lip between his own. “thank you, for this.”

“thank you for trusting me with this,” your fingers twirled his locks between your fingers.

“i don’t know how this normally works but... i think i just really want to-i want to...” he squinted his eyebrows before ripping the bandaid off, not wanting to sound too squishy. “can we just cuddle? i think i need to feel close to you.”

“of course we can, spence,” you replied. “but first i need to pee. i refuse to get a uti,” you quickly got up and ran to the bathroom, returning later and finding him cuddled underneath the sheets, leaving space on the bed beside him for you.

once you had laid down, he laid his head on your still bare chest. he loved the closeness and intimacy being bare with you had, and he had never felt it before.

spencer knew he had chosen the right person to not only share his high school reunion with, but also share his first time with. perhaps you would be the first, and last.

[foenixs]

Sex with Monsta X

note: this is a headcanon to what I believe sex with the members of Monsta X would be like, I see most of them as subs and wrote the bullet points according to this theory (again, these are just my two cents on the topic)

if you like my works please reblog them with a nice comment or tag

includes- sub!Monsta X x reader, mentions of different kinks (overstimulation, pet play, pegging, whipping, brat taming, choking, begging, degradation, dacryphilia, teasing, edging, biting), oral

none of the gifs used are mine

Shownu

-very classic, vanilla type (does not need anything more, but he can fuck you any way you crave)

-will be willing to try new things if it makes you happy and has no problems with letting you top or dom him

-likes it when you tell him what to do and then praise him when he’s doing a good job following orders (the perfect service top)

-might seem like he’s not too horny or eager to have sex with you sometimes but that’s just his calm (robot xD) self, you could come up to him at any time and he’d be ready/make some time for you

-will be mostly quiet, but smile when he feels good

-secretly loves when you overstimulate him and will let you know with low groans

-strong suit: thrusts (this man literally re-invented bodyrolls!!)

Wonho

-bunny with a capital B, he’s literally so fluffy and soft, a total sub and I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s actually into pet play (will be so happy when you buy him custom bunny ears)

-his body might be huge, but his heart is even bigger, and he’ll prove that in bed

-will do anything and everything for you, the most obedient of them all as he won’t even question your demands (this makes it very hard to punish him, but I mean how could you punish such a pure soul anyway)

-not afraid to moan

-lowkey has separation issues (I wonder why 🙁) so you’re gonna have to reinsure him that he’s yours and you’re his and nothing will change that

-strong suit: devotion (this just sums him up as a person)

Minhyuk

-he screams duality! Is a switch with a sub-leaning

-will be loud (!!), energetic, sometimes even bratty (but always in more of a playful way), but then he’ll suddenly do a 180° and become all cute and obedient

-very rarely gets flustered as he loves skin ship (so so proud of you and your relationship, at least in front of his members)

-not to mention he’s the con-artist of the group and will shamelessly use that to his advantage; if he wants to get punished, he’ll trick you into believing he did something wrong so you teach him a lesson, only for you to find out that that’s what he wanted and he actually hadn’t broken your rules all along (which makes you wanna punish him even more)

-every now and then he’ll get in his switch feels and will want to dom, but he’ll always ask you first and if you don’t like him taking the lead, he’ll drop it again or ask for a compromise (would rather push his own desires down than make you uncomfortable)

-I think he has the least problems with sharing you and he might even suggest having a threesome (wanting to have tried it at least once in his life), he knows you love him and is not one to get jealous easily

-strong suit: energy (would definitely be up for multiple rounds since he doesn’t get tired out easily)

Kihyun

-now this man is a little more complicated…

-I believe that he still has the mindset of men are on top and in control, while women need to be taken care of and he will use that mindset when you two first have sex

-you must be very blunt with him and tell him that that’s not what you are into and suggest that he let you top just once

-he will be very shy when he lets you do your thing for the first time and you’ll have to ease him into submission; will be even more embarrassed when he realizes how much better this new role feels

-will never let anyone know that he is secretly your sub, but over time (as he starts to trust you completely) he will melt in your hands like pudding and bend to your will

-his voice raises an octave while you fuck him and he’ll let out the most inhuman sounds (screeching, screaming, and what not), afterwards he’ll deny ever having made such sounds

-every now and then when he has a really bad day, he will become very bratty, not following any of your demands and he might even curse you out; that’s when the brat tamer inside you will burst through and you’ll whip him so hard he won’t be able to properly sit for days (will apologize for the mean things he said during aftercare and thank you for helping him forget about his day)

-threesomes are an absolute no-go, he hates sharing and would get super scared you’d leave him for someone else/that he’s not good enough for you (complete opposite of Minhyuk)

-strong suit: loyalty (you are his one and only and he doesn’t want or need anyone else)

Hyungwon

-he gives me the weakest sub-vibes out of all the members; doesn’t understand why you want to dom him so badly but if you insist on it, he’d still let you do it

-is very blunt when it comes to his desires and not ashamed to tell you when he wants to have sex

-likes it when you suck him off, but can’t take a lot of teasing/edging (might be unexpectedly turned on by overstimulation if you kept on going after he came and would ask you to do that again the next time)

-has a thing for feeling your hands rest on his chest and neck (not necessarily choking him), especially when you ride him

-loves making out while having sex and having you kiss down his neck and play with his hair, might even suck on your nipples if you let him

-can hold back sounds very well, but he secretly has the prettiest moans

-strong suit: lips (his oral skills are no joke, and he knows it; might play dumb about it just to tease you)

Jooheon

-the. Absolute. Fucking. Cutest. So adorable and so needy

-master at begging (is fluent in aegyo), always gets what he wants

-will cling onto you like a monkey and pout when you don’t have time to please him

-loves it when you tease and edge him, push his legs up to fuck his cute ass, pull on his hair, degrade him, use him, anything! just loves to have sex with you, all the time

-sex will pretty much always be rough and kinky so make sure to give him the best aftercare (CUDDLES!), will always thank you afterwards

-likes to wear your clothes and nothing else

-lives for the duality, like when you push your strap on down his throat while gently stroking his hair and telling him how good of a toy, he is for you

-will whimper so much and so loud; cannot keep quiet (you’ll have to gag him if you don’t want the whole neighbourhood to know that you are fucking your boyfriend, yet again)

-dacryphilia

-strong suit: obedience (will let you do anything to him as long as you do something; the only time he’ll whine and throw a tantrum is when you ignore him for too long)

Changkyun

-might be a major tease on stage but is so shy and quiet in real life

-loves to be roughened up but is not quite as straight forward about it as Jooheon

-lowkey likes when you slap him (whether it be his chest, thighs or maybe even his face)

-loves to get bitten by you and marked up and won’t bother covering them up the next day

-choking him will make him cum in a matter of minutes, sometimes seconds and if you don’t put your hands around his neck, he will literally grab them and do it himself

-is a growler and has the deepest moans (will moan out your title if you have one, if not he’ll just repeat your name)

-a god at eating you out, you practically live on his face (loves it when you pull on his hair while he goes down on you)

-he is a very honest and blunt person as well and he might even sit you down one day to talk about each other’s kinks and make plans for when and how you could try them in the future

-contrary to his on-stage persona, he is very affectionate with you and likes to hold you close to him/be held close to you

-he’s still young so I do believe he has a high sex drive, but he won’t pressure you into it

-strong suit: tongue, nose & fingers (uses the three to his advantage during oral)

masterlist

[heyitsyn]

Manager!Seijoh Part 2

a/n: lmao this is kinda weird for me but i think this was an interesting request so lets try it!

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

lowkey kyotani kentaro typa beat but you gotta squint (??)

also warning! angst!

anon request: Hii! I just read the seijoh manager headcannon you wrote, it made me cry so much, i love those seijoh boys so much, and you are such an amazing writer! I dont know if requests are open or not but i was wondering what would happen if the boys ever find out what happened to reader cha? If requests aren’t open or if you just don’t want to write about it, I completely understand! Thank you for your wonderful writing again! Stay safe!

the stageplay was *chefs kiss* like MY MANS IWA WAS SERVING LOOKSSSS

soooooo

this might get really angsty idk so just a warning in advance

anyways

i mentioned in the earlier part that no one really knew what happened to you

so this one is when they DO find out what happened and what theyre gonna do about it

so first off, kyoken was basically the only one who saw you that day and saw how badly you looked

the thing is, at that current moment, he didnt really know the reason why and what happened

he had theories that you got jumped or you just got into an accident 

but he was prettttttyyyy sure you got beat up

so you went home and rushed to yanno, take a shower and get your wound treated and cleaned so that it would heal bc you really cannot afford to let the boys see that

they would think of the worst at the smallest sight of blood on you and you really didnt want to deal w that chaos at the moment

you cant let them get suspended from school since they were going to interhigh soon and you cant let oikawa and the boys ruin their reputations just for you

a first year girl theyve just met

it was kinda hard to rinse all of the milk from your hair but you were able to at least get the smell out and clean up your mess

then you looked in the mirror and saw faint handprints around your throat from that girl miyo and you cringed as you touched it

‘jesus christ, seriously what does she eat? bricks?’

after your clothes were in the wash, you went to bed to get homework done and also looking up how to use the concealer to hide your bruises 

you didnt really own any makeup but your mom has some so you could just use that

during dinner, you wore a turtleneck to prevent any suspicion from happening but you couldnt really hide the big gash on your face

‘y/n, what happened!’

‘i was dumb and accidentally fell up the stairs’

your parents shared a chuckle bc theyve actually seen you do this before so it was easy to believe the lie

‘darling, do we need to get you glasses? it seems your sight has worsened’

‘haha’

you went along with the joke but you weren’t eating and just pushed your food around

‘y/n? is the food not good?’

your mother asked but you shook your head with a convincing smile

‘its good! i just had some meat buns with the team earlier and i ate a lot so im still full’

you cursed at yourself for making it sound so rehearsed but you were relieved when your mother nodded

the next morning, you were satisfied with the reduced puffing of your face and you snuck into your parents bathroom where her makeup bag would be

as you held up the concealer, you started getting anxious because this was not the same shade as your skin and it would definitely raise suspicion if you had a different color on your neck than the rest of your body

you already planned to blame your wound as acne that you accidentally scratched but what were you going to do with the handprints?

the website you read said that it would take at least a day for them to fade

so you decided youd just wear a scarf and pretend you were cold

kunimi was confused as to why you had a scarf bundled around your neck and his eyes even widened at the sight of the bandaid on your face

‘y/n! what-!’

he shot up from his seat and your eyes widened before hissing at him to sit down

‘what happened to you?!’

he worriedly asked but you waved him off with a small smile

‘acne. this was the only available bandaid in my house so i had to work with this’

kunimi might be a lazy little shit but he was observant

and he noticed the way you said that sentence

it was like a robot

like a robot programmed to say what was written on its script

but before he could press on further, you already pointed out that the teacher was coming in and to hush so you could listen

the entire time, kunimi was awake alright, but he was too busy looking at you and a bright red thing that poked from the edge of your bandaid

kindaichi went to your classroom for lunch and you had to repeat your excuse for him but he pointed at another thing

‘why are you wearing a scarf? its like burning in here’

you didnt look at him as you just opened your bento

‘being in your period causes your temperature to fluctuate and cause unexplainable chill at even the hottest places’

okay what

they both shared a look and just shrugged, blaming it on your time of the month for the way you spoke with no emotion in your tone

this had to be the longest school day of your life

the whole time the scarf remained on and kunimi cant help but notice your flinches at the smallest of sounds

finally practice arrived and you really thought you could pull this off until oikawa barreled straight towards you and hugged you tightly

‘y/n-chan! you okay?! oikawa-senpai was so worried for you!’ 

you cringed but nodded

‘im okay, oikawa-san’

‘senpai, y/n-chan! call me senpai!’

‘im not going to feed into your kink, oikawa-san’

*cue everyone busting a lung*

‘y/n, what’s the-’

‘acne. only bandaid available in my house’

eventually, everything was fine

you were still cracking jokes w the others and you were still laughing w them so kunimi and kindaichi were at ease

but that shattered when oikawa was being oikawa and was being all touchy and bothering you about the scarf around your neck that he ended up pulling it off and he saw the marks

he was silent, just staring at them

ofc you were freaking out and you started breathing heavily

oh god he found out and he was going to hurt them

‘o-oikawa-senpai, listen, it’s not what it-’

‘y/n’

his voice made your eyes shut in fear and the others crowded around you and they all had scandalized looks on their faces

‘is this why you werent in practice yesterday?’

his voice was sharp, a complete opposite to his normally cheerful tone

you shivered and sighed

‘senpai, please dont-’

‘who is it?’

the other third years shared a look bc they were truly shook at oiks voice

‘w-why should i tell you?! its none-’

‘i am your captain and i deserve to know who is pulling you away from your managerial duties so he could just give you these damn hickeys!’

the gym turned silent

you stopped then furrowed your eyebrows

‘hickey? what-’

‘dont act like you dont know, y/n. so just be honest and tell me who’s your boyfriend’

lmao i shouldnt laugh bc this was supposed to be sad but im cackling at how dumb oikawa really is sometimes

‘i-i,,,,’

you stuttered but you knew this was the perfect opportunity

you could just blame it on this ridiculous misunderstanding 

its a difficult hole to get out of but it would be easier than the other

so you pretended to be flustered and turned around to hide your face

‘it was a one-time thing, oikawa-san. i promise it wont happen again’

HELLO WHAT

the team was leaking the feeling of RAGE

how dare someone take their manager!

she was theirs!

and it doesnt help that every player might have a little thing for you

is this really turning into a harem

oikawa kept demanding answers but iwa hit him enough to quit and they finally went back to practicing but they were still distracted

every time they looked at you, they would grow flustered and red and end up missing a block or a serve

they just cant see their baby manager like that

you noticed it quickly and irritably got on them

‘stop staring at my neck and get back to practice!’

they flinched and saluted at you

lmao this little first year girl is able to control nearly a dozen <5′10 men who are all older than her

but you were glad that they finally stopped asking about it

this was going to go by smoothly and you were going to be okay

however,,,

several days later,,,

this is an angst fanfiction so i will bring thy angst

you were taking out your class garbage since it was your group’s turn in cleaning the classroom when you were grabbed by the arm on your way back

it was still outside and after school so it wouldve been an unlikely situation that someone would help you

it was that biatch miyo again and her 2 minions behind her

then you recognized one girl from the track team who was actually a year older than you but you saw her dropping off some files in the office

if you tried to run, she could easily grab you w her fast legs

great

you were stuck

you let out a tired sigh and crossed your arms on your chest

‘what is it you want from me, again?’

she smirked

‘you really dont know how to listen, do you? i told you to stay away from oikawa but youre still flaunting around with him!’

is she serious?

this girl was borderline stalker/yandere type of girl

you gave her an incredulous look and frowned

‘girl, do you hear yourself? you damn crazy and im leaving’

but she grabbed you back and shoved you against the wall

but this time, you kicked her on the chest to make her fall on her flat booty

surprise was written on their faces and you stretched your arms in front of you to symbolize distance

‘one more step and ill beat tf out of you. i just got my nails off so id watch it if i were you’

miyo huffed and stood up, brushing herself, glaring at one of the girls who tried to help her

then she remembered what you told her

‘hmm? if you hit me, you could be kicked off of the team since you hurt another student. so, go ahead, little kouhai’

she was right

even if it was self-defense, the school’s disciplinary section sucked and just suspended or kicked off people left and right even though they didnt do anything wrong

you were stumped

you were here on a scholarship, not on tuition

your mom would KILL you if she found out you got into a fight and got a record

but you didnt show that and kept your tough facade

‘dont challenge me. i could be a crazy bitch and i dont think youd like your little face being all messed up. so watch your mouth and leave me alone’

you turned to leave but she grabbed your hair and tugged it back

lmao flashbacks to the other part

she twisted your hair into a ponytail and had a firm grip while a girl kicked you behind your knees so you would fall to the ground

oh no you were done w this

you elbowed miyo on the stomach the hardest you could and she groaned which loosened her hold and you kicked her again to the ground

some other girl hit your side and you winced before slapping her straight across the face bc you didnt want to punch her and hurt your knuckles

but they were really testing you

the last girl still had your hair but you twisted around to face her and just did the last you could think of that would hurt

hit her right between her legs

you finally escaped their hold and miyo lunged after you

‘oh my god leave me alone!’

you yelled before holding up your arms to protect your face but she scratched your arms 

obviously you were losing this bc it was just you but you were going to fight as much as you can

‘bad kouhais need to be punished! your senpais need to teach you a lesson!’

miyo screeched and you grabbed her arm before punching her straight at the boob

sorry rebecca

however, one girl was smart and did the same thing you did to her knees and made you fall to a kneeling position and eventually made you curl into a fetal position

gurl we actually fighting so hard considering we’ve never been in a fight

they continuously kicked you before miyo pulled up your head so you could sit up and kneel in front of her

ofc you tried to grab at her and punch at her

but these other girls were able to catch you and trap your arms in their hold and had their feet on your legs so you couldnt kick

great, another bathroom scene

your arms were bleeding from miyo’s scratches and your sides were hurting after their kicks

you lost and you were already bleeding in places you didnt think you would

this would be the last attempt and if he doesnt come, you’re done for

‘IIIIIIWWWWWAAAAAAAA-SAAAAAANNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!’

your scream echoed throughout the entire are

possibly could be heard in new york

and your voice became hoarse

ofc the girls were surprised and caught off guard but when there was silence and clear that no one was coming, they started laughing

‘oh, so cute! iwa-san? is that supposed to be iwaizumi-san? heh, you whoring around w him too? thats so cute-’

‘LET. GO. OF. HER. NOW.’

I GOT CHILLS

the girls holding you shrieked and dropped their hold on you before scrambling back causing you to drop to the ground

miyo’s eyes were wide and there was horror all over her face at the voice of that infamous boy

kyotani kentarou

‘WHAT THE FK ARE YOU DOING?!’

he yelled and miyo turned around to be met with his piercing eyes before screaming and running away with her minions in tow

‘YEA RUN AWAY! FKING COWARDS!’

ltr the cursing is so awkward for me to do but this is his character and im just so awkward so sorry!!

you coughed and winced at the pain on your side which caught his attention

again, he noticed you as the manager of their team and you’ve been hanging out w him, well, just him staring at you, at the alley while you feed the animals

you were actually nice and caring and definitely didnt deserve this

‘oi, y-you okay?’

you didnt look up, just closing your eyes in pain and biting your lips to not let out the crying

his eyes softened at you and he noticed you were trying to act tough and brave even though you just got beat up

normally, he wouldnt even help anyone but it seems you just did something to him

he sighed before gently picking you up, you not even bothering to stop him, and he held you tightlyin his arms as he carried you to the nurses office

he had a feeling you didnt want to be seen like this and hes been in the nurse enough to know she actually leaves the moment school ends

you let out a shaky breath as he set you down on the cot and you opened your eyes to reach your hold for him when he went away

‘n-no, don’t leave-’

but he grunted softly before holding your wrist

‘im just getting your damn medicine. chill out’

lowkey getting bakugou vibes

you nodded and went to close your eyes again

kyo returned w some pain relief medicine from his bag that he carries 

babie actually gets into fights often and he needs it sometimes

and he had alcohol medicine kind istg and bandaids for your arms

it was silent as you drank the pills and he sat down next to you so he could treat the wounds

but he let his curiosity take over him

‘why the fk did you let them do this to you’

he grunted and you scoffed with a smile

‘let? more like overpower me and grip me as they just hit me’

‘cant you fight them back?’

you glared at him

‘bruh i literally kneed some girl in their cooch but they just some superhuman typa girls that cant be hurt’

he sighed

‘maybe you just werent strong enough’

okay listen here you lil shit

you didnt want to listen to him scold you anymore so you just went back to closing your eyes

but kyo is actually lowkey nosy so he kept asking questions

‘the first time we met. was it her too?’

you flinched in surprise

‘you remembered that?’

‘ofc i did. you looked like shit. not as bad as this but still like shit’

‘gee thanks, stranger-kun’

‘kyotani,,, kentarou’

you smiled

‘nice to meet you, kyotani kentarou. im l/n y/n’

‘i know’

he mumbled but you didnt catch it

‘thanks for hearing me and coming to help’

he hummed

he wasnt going to tell you that he actually heard the scream for his idol and thought hed be there so he ran to go see him but instead saw you

kyo just respects and looks up to iwa-chan so much it warms my heart uwu-

once you were all patched up, you were finally able to stand but you still staggered

he grabbed your arm softly and sat you back down

‘what the hell are you going to tell the team?’

you paused then sighed

‘i dont know. ill figure something out’

but he knew how observant the players would be and they would catch on

after all, he was there watching at the top bleachers as oikawa yelled at you for the ‘hickey’

‘if they didnt hit your face, you could get away with it. but you have wounds all over you and theyd find out. im guessing youre doing this bc you dont want to trouble them or burden them? bc they would do something about it?’

you just stared at this guy

‘how-’

‘just a guess’

he also wasnt going to tell you that he was actually part of the team but the constant fighting got him in suspension

and the fact that his parents were donors for the school, he only got a tap on the wrist

‘so what do i do, then?’

‘tell them-’

‘no i cant do that! another plan, kyo-kun!’

‘oi, im a second year, idiot. treat me with respect’

the irony bc he totally treats oikawa like trash

‘i just,,,, oikawa-san is seen as this prince/gentleman type and i know how protective he is towards me so the slightest problem could cause him to be ballistic. miyo is popular enough to circulate rumors about him and hes already in his third year and she is too so i just have to endure one year until theyre gone’

kyo was disgusted

all this for that stupid idiot captain?

‘youre dumber than i thought’

you weakly hit him at the arm

‘so mean, kyo-san’

‘i dont think its right youre suffering for someone who isnt even worth it’

you glared and linked your fingers together

‘im the manager. i knew this would happen the moment i signed up but i didnt care. as manager, i have to keep up the team’s image and their popularity for support so i cant let all that be ruined just bc a little first year girl couldnt fight for herself’

‘just tell them, kid. less problems’

then he stood up to leave

‘kid?! im only a year younger than you! what you mean!’

but you were panicking

someone knew about you being hurt and they could easily tell the team

and it only increased when he entered the gym and later introduced himself as a player

you were so surprised that you stopped breathing

‘kyo-san,,,’ 

you muttered and he glared at you

well, more like look at you but i have a theory that kyo actually has problems w his sight so it looks like he’s glaring at you constantly but hes just actually trying to see clearly

‘yo’

oikawa was surprised at this interaction

‘eh? you know kyoken-chan?’

you nodded, still looking at the blonde

‘i-uh’

‘its none of your business’

kyotani grunted and you sighed in relief

maybe your secret would be safe

you were still uneasy about him accidentally revealing it, especially since he practically worships iwaizumi-san, but he kept his mouth shut

your caring personality at first was overbearing on him but he appreciated your efforts like volunteering on helping him with his eyeliner or asking him if he needed help with his medical tape

ngl, he also thought you were there just bc it was a team full of guys and you thought you could have that weird girl fantasy of having a harem

but you cared for them like practically a mother and continuously made it clear to oikawa that you were NOT interested in going on a date with him

you werent annoying, you were nice, and you weren’t pushy so he actually showed you respect and took a liking to you

this created a soft of protectiveness around you

sometimes, he would see you around school and he would practically glare at the girls he knew hated you

and when he wasnt there to protect you, you would call him to the nurses office where he would mumble apologies of not being there while patching you up before he would go over and threaten them to touch you again and he would bite their fingers off

aww hes so cute

ofc he still kept your secret bc it wasnt his business to tell 

until that one day

it was normal practice with you helping the boys toss the balls so they could spike it

iwaizumi spiked it really hard making you flinch and he apologized profusely after you almost fell off the chair you were standing on in surprise

‘im just angry that that damn shittykawa is the captain and is late to his own damn practice’

oikawa? late?

that was unheard of

you were about to get off the chair and look for him when the devil himself entered the gym with the devil’s mistress on his arm

miyo was holding on to his arm as he laughed at something she said and ruffled her hair

you dropped the ball and kyotani quickly moved to you so he could stand in front of you protectively

‘oi! shittykawa! youre late!’

oikawa just smiled and pointed at the girl

‘miyo-chan made us cookies, iwa-chan!’

at the mention of food, the boys ran forward but you and kyotani remained at the side at the infamous name

you got off the chair and hurriedly placed an arm in front of him

‘don’t, kyo-san’

‘the bitch-’

‘i know. but please, dont’

you begged and he huffed before aggresively wrapping an arm around your shoulder

aggressively cares for you

‘if she does something or even talks shit, i will-’

‘kyoken-chan! y/n-chan! come here!’

oikawa called but kyotani snarled at him

you smile wobbled when miyo’s eyes narrowed at you and she smirked

‘oh? your manager is so cute, oikawa-kun!’

the rest of the team was just blinking at this weird tension

kyo had his arm tightly around you and hatingly glaring at this girl, who was icily smirking at you, and you tightly holding kyo’s shirt with a worried glint in your eyes

‘you were late to your own damn practice, oikawa. stop wasting time eating this shit and go back to playing’

tbh it still shocks you at how rudely kyo talks to oikawa but you were too pre-occupied on making sure this kid wasnt going to lunge at this girl

‘a-ah, right. oikawa-san, we have to return to practice. if you excuse us, miyo-san-’

you were about to gently grab oikawa’s arm to bring him back when she grabbed your wrist and secretly gripped it

‘oh, dont be so uptight, y/n-chan! i worked so hard-’

but kyo immediately snatched her hand away from you and squeezed it as tight as he could, making her wince

oikawa noticed the pain in miyo’s face and he was angry that kyotani was hurting a girl

‘oi! kyotani!’

he shouted and pushed him away, making the team, even iwa, worriedly look at kyo and brace themselves for the beating

iwa jumped into action and held the second year back while you jumped in front of oikawa

‘kyo-san, calm-’

‘you! be quiet’

he shouted, finger pointing at you

‘and you!’

before pointing to oikawa

‘you are a shitty captain’

‘kyotani!’

iwa was just straight out confused and hes really questioning life decisions right now

mom is stressed and confused, i repeat, MOM IS STRESSED AND CONFUSED

oikawa’s eyes narrowed but he just calmly talked

‘we’ll talk about this later’

‘miyo-san, we really need to practice so if you could see yourself out’

iwa gently smiled to the girl, who was about to protest, but makki and mattsun has already pointed to the door

she huffed then turned to leave and once she was gone, iwa let go of kyotani

‘kyotani, what the hell was that’

oikawa lowly asked and you were about to put your arms out to separate them but yahaba and watari grabbed you so you wouldnt be caught in the middle

then kyo turned to you, fire in his eyes

‘either you tell him or i will’

can we just talk about how protective kyo is?

you trembled and you roughly left yahaba and watari’s grip so you could gently place your hands on his chest

‘please, kyo. just leave it, okay? remember, it’s my busi-’

‘if i see that bitch enter this gym again, i dont give a flying fuck if shes a girl. ill beat the living daylights out of her’

‘kyotani kentarou, what-!’

oikawa shouted but your glare shut him up

‘y/n-chan, what is going on’

‘n-nothing. kyo-san is just, yknow, being him. you know? okay. now lets get back to practice, everyone!’

coach irihata and the other guy sharing that look

to say the least, miyo was pissed

and when she was pissed at you, she always did what she normally does

she corners you wherever its deserted and beat you with the help of her minions who holds you down while she slaps, hits, or kicks you

girlie you needs to tell the boys youre literally getting hit and abused and im just-!!!!!!!!!

and thats exactly what she did

only this time, she wore hard-tipped shoes

‘see, y/n-chan? i saved up and got these shoes just for you!’

the minions were just sharing looks of fear and genuine sympathy for you

they were only there bc she blackmailed them with pictures doing questionable things and if they dont help, they would be released

as usual, you didnt cry, biting your lip as you winced from the pain of her kick at your side

‘youre so pathetic. how could you do this to a person? and all this for your oikawa-san? for a boy?’

you wheezed at her causing her eyes to flare

‘HAH?! SAY THAT AGAIN!’

‘i said-’

but you were cut off when she slapped the soul out of you

her ring cut you at the lip and you cringed at the taste of blood from your lip

‘what else? we gotta hurry this up, miyo, because practice started like 5 minutes ago and im going to get yel-’

‘SHUT UP!’

kyotani entered the gym after his talk with his teacher and immediately looked around for you

his honey brown eyes scanned the area and they widened as your figure wasn’t in sight

‘oi, yahaba, wheres the manager’

the boy shrugged from the side 

‘i dont know. shes late though’

oh god

‘kindaichi! kunimi! youre in the same grade right? did you see where she went after class?’

kunimi paused to remember before answering

‘she stayed after to talk to obe-sensei for the homework, that’s all i know’

that meant she stayed behind and was probably somewhere

‘SHIT!’

he shouted before bolting out the door

ofc the boys were all worried of his outburst and started yelling after him

‘kyotani!’

‘kyoken-chan?!’

they followed him, who was running as fast as he can

the girls would probably do it outside to avoid having to clean up their mess and he almost wrenched the door open in a hurry to take a lap around the school building

it was certainly a sight to see: a boy with dyed blonde hair and two brown lines followed after an entire volleyball team who were screaming after him

‘YOU-!’

he heard that bitch voice and bolted towards the back, where the dumpster was, and found you at the same position like the first time he saw you

blood was dripping on the floor from your busted lip and a cut on your cheek while your eyes were wide at the sight of kyotani’s panting form

‘kyo-!’

‘kyotani!’

your eyes watered at the sight of the entire volleyball team behind him, also eviqualiently surprised yet fuming angry

the girls who held you dropped your arms and ran for the hills so they wouldnt get caught

kyo pushed miyo aside as he grabbed you from the floor and held you

oikawa gave miyo a look that cannot even be described in words

all it was: incredibly, super, ridiculously, heatedly, furiously, angry

now multiply that by the entire team

‘hm, my father, who is the chieftain of the police, mentioned about there being jail time for even minors who commit serious acts like assault or bullying’

mattsun seethed

‘really? i think he’d like the video as evidence against kenta miyo for assault and battery, including bullying, so how many years would that add up to? nearly a decade?’

the girl miyo squeaked as oikawa and iwaizumi roughly grabbed each wrist

‘how long’

miyo trembled at the increased pressure on her wrist

‘IM ASKING YOU A FUCKING QUESTION! HOW LONG!’

iwaizumi has never shouted at a girl before and hopefully, it would be the last

‘s-s-since l-last month’

you burrowed your head in kyotani’s shirt

‘please dont’

‘shut the fk up, y/n-chan, we’re not talking to you right now’

oikawa coldly reprimanded

‘everyone, take y/n away. iwaizumi and i can take care of this. but mattsun, makki, track down those 3 girls and find others who have even touched our manager’

‘got it, boss’

if it was in a different situation, you wouldve applauded oikawa at his ability to be a leader but you were currently in pain from the bruises and the cuts all over you

your fellow first-years were angrily punching things in the nurse’s office

rip nurse in the morning when she finds holes all over her walls

the irony is, the most agressive one, kyotani kentarou, was the calmest as he quietly cleaned your wounds and placed ointment on the bruises

‘i told you so’

he mumbled and you scoffed

‘howd you find me anyways?’

‘dumb bitch yaps really loud’

he answered

no one was yelling at you and no one was saying a word

eventually, oikawa and iwaizumi entered followed by the rest of the third years

‘why. why didnt you tell us, y/n?’

oikawa asked as he sat down on the chair beside the bed

you looked down and fiddled with your fingers

‘if i did, you wouldve hurt her. and she wouldve spread rumors about you and ruin the image and reputation of the grand king and the volleyball team. i didnt want to do that to you and thought i could just endure it one year since youre graduating anyways’

iwaizumi sucked in a harsh breath

‘you wouldn’t have known what we were going to do. you are no oracle and you dont know how we are going to handle this situation. so you were really stupid for keeping these things to yourself, y/n. you may be our manager and our caretaker but let us take care of you too’

you nodded but your tears fell

‘sorry. im really sorry. i didnt meant to trouble you’

‘stop apologizing, y/n’

‘sorry’

‘y/n!’

you bowed your head low and bit your lip in guilt

‘i shouldve told you but i didnt and now everyone is troubled-’

‘we’re a team, y/n. youre not a lone wolf anymore. you have a pack standing right beside you’

watari mumbled and he sat down to give you his favorite hug: the one arm hug

‘im super angry right now and it might seem like im snappy but i really want you to know, y/n, that i really love you and i am just hurt that you didnt trust us enough to tell us you were suffering when i trust you with my entire being. so next time youre hurting or in pain, dont you dare keep it to yourself. tell us, okay? tell your senpais and friends about it so we can share that burden’

oikawa babie you are so mature like what-

what started out as a hug from watari turned into a team hug around the tiny bed, even kyo joined, and you were so happy you found a good team that appreciated you and everything youve done and accepted you as one of their own

‘oikawa-san, what did you do to miyo?’

‘again, im mad y/n-chan, so please dont talk about her right now’

‘iwa-san?’

‘dont use those puppy eyes on me! dont you dare-- okay, we’re pressing charges’

silence

‘WHAT?!’

‘and iwa-chan slapped her!’

‘WHAT?!’

‘shut up shittykawa you did too!’

‘WHAT?!’

a/n: this hurted a bit and im sorry if this was lowkey awkward and all over the place but i didnt exactly know how to portray this situation since ive never experienced this, just bullying in general, before but for those who have, please tell someone so that you dont have to carry that burden by yourself. it doesnt have to be a your parents, but talk to a trusted adult so that this type of stuff doesnt happen to you bc you truly dont deserve that type of treatment and deserve to be happy and feel safe in an environment like school or anywhere in general

[tomboyneedshercoffee]

Lovedust Pt.6 || Peter Parker x Stark Reader

Summary: Y/N finds out more about how the lovedust works and it leads to her realizing her biggest fears about Peter if he’s cured. 

Word Count: 4.2k

Author’s Note: There’s a lot going on right now but thank you guys for being so incredibly kind and patient with me. Shit is going to hit the fan real soon with Lovedust so stay tuned! ALSO Don’t forget to leave comments if you guys liked it or hey even if you hated it! ALSO ALSO My taglist is getting pretty big and hectic so if I missed yours, I am VERY sorry pls just message me again so I can add you asap!

Warnings: Mild language, mentions of death and nightmares, slowburn

part one || part two || part three || part four || part five || part six ||

part seven || part eight || epilogue 

As your eyes fluttered open, you gave yourself a minute to adjust to the sound of rain hitting against your bedroom window. You closed your eyes as you inhaled deeply, your arm instinctively reached beside you to touch Peter, only to find that side of the bed empty. 

You opened your eyes again and slowly raised yourself up to turn to see that your prediction was correct and that he wasn’t next to you. You knew it wasn’t a dream, you distinctively remembered him holding you as you fell asleep but you guessed he might’ve left soon after. 

The memories of last night rushed through your head as you felt your heart drop slightly and already, you felt empty so early in the morning. You remembered everything about the nightmare but more importantly, you remembered Peter cradling you like a child as you cried in his arms. 

You couldn’t wrap your head around a single feeling to describe the thoughts in your mind. As every day passed, Peter was showing you more and more how much he truly cared for you, and the thought of him not being able to keep the same energy once he was cured terrified you. 

You loved this new Peter and how kind and compassionate he was around you. It was annoying at first dealing with the cringey pick up lines and weird comments about the two of you getting married but now that you realized there was more to those side effects, you found him even more endearing. 

It was the small things like how he sacrificed the right side of his body so that you could fit under the umbrella perfectly or how he would willingly sit through a horror movie for you even though you both knew how much he hated them. 

You even saw a change in yourself and how you treated him. The other day, you two sat side by side on the couch and shared headphones while listening to the playlist you made for him or when you would tell him a dumb joke just so you could hear him laugh. 

It was selfish to hang onto the idea that Peter would always be this kind to you but you rather savored the moments you two had together since you knew better to know that nothing in life was guaranteed. 

You felt embarrassed that he had seen you so vulnerable, especially since Peter didn’t know what happened to your parents and now, you felt like you owed him an explanation. You looked back at your clock and sighed once you saw that you had already missed the beginning half of school, you thought screw it, you were taking a mental health day. 

“ Is it senior skip day or something?” You looked up to see your dad standing in your doorway with his arms crossed over his chest in a scolding manner but once he saw your dazed expression, he dropped the act,” Y/N? Is everything okay?”

You could feel your throat tighten as you shook your head, refusing to cry again. 

“ Nightmare,” You swallowed to stop yourself from letting anymore sobs from coming out of your mouth as Tony sat next to you and put his hand on your shoulder. 

“ I know kid, I know,” Tony brought you closer to him as you hugged him tightly. 

You had told Tony about your nightmares but he was already well aware on what happened with your parents. You were still pretty young when your parents had passed and you’ve lived most of your life with Tony as a parent but that didn’t mean you weren’t traumatized over what happened years ago. 

Tony had not only given you a good home and had locked down your future, but he was always there to listen and offer help, whether it was from himself or health experts.

“ It was Peter this time,” You said softly as you felt your dad hug you even tighter,” I don’t know why but he was in the nightmare and he-he tried to hurt me...I feel so guilty, I don’t know why he was there but my brain just made him  you know?” 

“ That’s not something you can control Y/N, remember what I said, your brain just picks up on different people-unless he did something. Did he do something to you? Cause I swear-”

“ No, no Dad it was the opposite,” You sighed as you pulled away and bit the inside of your cheek,” I know you told me not to hang out with Peter but...we’ve been getting closer and I think I...I don’t know. All I know was that when he comforted me after my nightmare, I felt the safest I’ve been in a long time….Things are different now. I don’t know what I could say to convince you but please don’t get mad.” 

You looked down at your bedsheets to avoid his gaze and you weren’t sure if he was burning a stern glare at the back of your head or not. 

“ I’m not mad about Peter, I already knew you were seeing him behind my back anyway and I should’ve known you two would’ve pulled some Romeo and Juliet bullcrap. Anyway- You’re strong enough to look after yourself, hell stronger than some of these people living here and if I may speak candidly, I know you could kick his ass if he ever crossed a line,” Your dad said as you let out a small chuckle,” I want you to be safe and happy. I would prefer you feel that way without a boy in the mix but I won’t yuck your yum.”

You wrinkled your nose but you couldn’t help but smirk,” Do you think I’m strong enough to become an Avenger?” 

“ You already are,” Your dad smiled as you inhaled deeply,” but before we get too mushy, I did actually want to talk to you about the other day, you know, about Peter’s health.”

You sat up straighter in your seat as you nodded attentively at him before he continued. 

“ It’s really important that you keep this between you, me and Banner, okay? I’m gonna use some big words so keep up,” You nodded again as you felt your heart beat rapidly against your chest,” you already know this but the lovedust activates a huge amount of serotonin in the body and sometimes that can lead to some major health problems. Well, with every day that passes, he runs the risk of having a ventricular tachycardia and that’s what explained how he collapsed the other day-”

“ Hold on, he collapsed? And did you say a ventricular tachycardia? Like a heartattack?” You asked as you felt your own heart stop for a moment as your dad gave you a confused expression,” So you’re telling me the lovedust could kill him? When did this happen?”

Your dad inhaled sharply as he swallowed hard,” Yesterday afternoon. We were done running tests and Banner noticed a car pull up and I said it was your friend John-”

“Josh.”

“ Yeah sure. Then we heard a loud thud and Peter just dropped. He just fainted but still, it’s a sign that things are getting worse,” Your dad said as you felt your heart completely shatter.

You felt like it was all of your fault. Even though Peter just fainted, he could’ve hit his head and died right there and you couldn’t stop yourself from filling your head with more terrible thoughts. 

“ Oh my god, I never thought things would get this bad,” You said as you rested your forehead in the palm of your hands, trying to keep a consistent stream of thoughts but each idea made you think of Peter getting hurt,” and there’s still not a cure? What have you guys even figured out so far-it’s been almost a week!” 

You knew your dad was trying his best but all you wanted was for Peter to get better and it didn’t help that time was against everyone. Peter could suffer a heartattack at any time of day and it didn’t make you feel better than nothing was being solved. 

“ Well we have a pretty strong theory about what caused the lovedust if you’re up for hearing it,” Your dad suggested as you hesitantly nodded. 

“ Our main theory is that the lovedust is effective when the patient- Peter- makes contact with the variable-you- and since you were the first person he saw, it activated his serotonin output. So it could’ve been anyone and Peter would’ve had the same reaction,” Tony said and it was so silent for a minute that you could hear a pin drop,” why is your face pale?”

You didn’t know how much you didn’t want to hear that theory until this very moment. You weren’t even sure why you could feel your throat close up again but this news made you sink back onto your bed. 

Peter really didn’t mean anything he was saying. After all those late night talks about how in love with you he was, those were all just side effects. Those were never his thoughts. He never really loved you. 

“ Oh...that’s good I guess,” You said quietly as Tony’s pager buzzed. You could tell Tony wanted to stay and talk to you but when he looked down at the notification, it seemed pretty urgent,” you can go, I’m just gonna stay here for a little bit.” 

“ We’ll talk later, okay kiddo?” Tony patted your knee and walked past your bed, closing your bedroom door behind him. 

You stared up at your bedroom ceiling as you thought about what your dad said. Peter’s condition was getting worst but now, at least they figured out something that could help them along the way. If they could figure out the properties of the lovedust than that means they could reverse it and find a cure. 

What if you didn’t want them to find a cure? 

You almost talked yourself out of your thought and called yourself a selfish idiot in the process, the goal was for them to help Peter. This could help Peter, you reminded yourself as you got up from your bed to get dressed. 

You weren’t sure where you wanted to go but you thought that your mental health day could carry on to the outside world. 

Mad....why were you mad? 

You had no reason to be so upset and you kept reminding yourself as the elevator went down to the garage. You aggressively pressed the button to unlock your car and once you sat down in the driver’s seat, you started your car and backed out of the garage. 

It was pouring outside and while you hated driving in the rain, you just had to leave to clear your head. 

Why were you upset?

Maybe because for once in your life, you felt special. 

You stopped on the brakes and you could feel your heart sink into your chest as the rain hit against your windshield. 

You shook your head slowly before you slapped your hands against your steering wheel hard.  

Was it awful that you loved the attention you were getting and maybe, just maybe, you were starting to see Peter differently? 

You slammed your firsts against the wheel again and again as you let out a frustrated grunt through your gritted teeth. 

You were mad that Peter could die. You were mad that there wasn’t a cure. You were mad that the lovedust had ruined your life. You were content without Peter meddling in your life but now that he had left such an impression, all you wanted to do was make sure he stayed as true to himself as he was now. 

You couldn’t expect that from him. You couldn’t expect that once he was cured, he would act back to his regular douchebag self but anything was possible, he didn’t owe you anything. 

You taunted yourself as you tried to snap out of whatever this hellish tantrum you were throwing. 

Why would you be upset over a guy who had fake feelings for you all this time? 

It wasn’t his fault and it wasn’t your fault either.

Anyone. It could have been anyone. It could’ve been a sockpuppet and Peter would’ve probably tried marrying the damn thing. 

You snapped your head over to the passenger side of the door once you heard a hard tap come from the window. Once you saw it was Peter, you turned to face the front and unlocked the door without looking back at him. 

He opened the door and sat down beside you in the passenger seat without saying anything. He was soaking wet from head to toe and while you were annoyed he was getting the inside of your car wet, you had more important things to focus on. 

It was too quiet for your liking but there wasn’t anything you wanted to say to him. Frankly, you weren’t sure why you even let him in.

“ How did you sleep?” Peter asked quietly as he tested the waters.

It was clear that you were in some type of mood but Peter never knew how to approach situations like this, especially since he didn’t know why you were so upset. 

“ I slept fine, you?” 

“ Good I guess,” Peter shrugged as he shifted awkwardly in his seat,” are you okay? Are you upset about what happened last night-”

“ No,” You said truthfully as you leaned your head back against the headrest,” I mean, yes, I’m okay but no I’m not upset about last night.”

“ Well something is clearly bothering you and I just want to help. You know you can tell me anything, I mean it Y/N, we’re friends now. We shouldn’t be hiding things from each other,” Peter said as you let out a dry laugh. 

You knew you couldn’t reveal everything to Peter about what your dad had told you but it didn’t stop you from feeling angry. 

“ Okay, you want to be honest, lets be honest. When were you going to tell me that you collapsed at the lab?” You asked as you turned your whole body to face him,” my dad told me this morning.” 

Peter inhaled deeply but looked you straight in the eye,” I was going to tell you... eventually. It’s not like I had time to really sit down with you, I know you’re going through a lot right now and I didn’t want to stress you out. Besides, I feel fine now, it’s not a big deal.”

It was a big deal, he could die. That’s what you wanted to tell him. His life was at stake and yet you were keeping this big secret from him. It was hypocritical and wrong and if anyone else had told you, you would’ve revealed to Peter about his worsening condition. 

But it was your dad who told you to keep things a secret for now and you just had to trust him for both of your sakes. 

You looked at him for a moment as you studied his face while he did the same to you. It was as if you both had so much on your mind yet no one wanted to be the first one to detonate the bomb. 

“ I’m just so tired Peter. I’m tired of having conflicted feelings on whether or not this lovedust has been creating more problems than solving them… Whatever this is between us, I like it a lot but I hate feeling so pathetic to the point where I actually enjoy the feeling of having a guy give me attention only because of some space shit,” You turned your attention back to the steering wheel,” How do we carry on with our lives once you’re cured? What’s stopping you from being a complete asshole to me like before?” 

“ I told you, nothing has to change. No matter what happens, we’ll always be in each other’s lives as friends or something more. I would never treat you the way I did in the past, I swear on my life.” 

Peter could feel the energy in the car shift right as he finished speaking but there was nothing he could do to change the course of the conversation. The path had already been set and now, he just had to strap in and hope he could hang on. 

“ How am I supposed to believe that? How do I know anything you’re saying is true? Everything this lovedust has been built on is a lie, you don’t love me Peter. It’s a fucking chemical reaction that is messing with your body,” You snapped loudly but Peter hardly flinched,” your mind and body has been corrupted by a parasite. You say you love me but if you take the lovedust away, you don’t. It’s that simple.” 

“ Just because it’s a chemical reaction doesn’t mean that the way I’m feeling is a lie. I spend so many nights thinking about you and how happy you make me so for you to say that I don’t actually love you-”

“ Are you listening to yourself? You love me because of the dust, why is that so hard for you to understand? Love is supposed to be natural, this is not natural!  If the way you’re feeling isn’t a lie, look me in the eye right now and tell me, did you love me before the lovedust?” You asked as you turned back to face him,” tell me the honest truth, did you love me?” 

Peter felt like his body was burning up in the worst possible way and his throat felt dry as he thought carefully. It was so hard for him to see how terrible he was in the past because of the lovedust, all he could think when he saw you was just utter love. 

You were visibly hurt, even if you were shouting at him he could read you like a book and there was something that he knew was there but he just couldn’t figure out what it was. It felt like some sort of test that Peter had to decipher; he didn’t have all of the pieces of the puzzle so how was he supposed to get the full picture? 

“ I don’t...no. No I didn’t,” Peter said softly as you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding,” but that doesn’t mean I didn’t care about you.” 

There it was, the million-dollar answer to the million-dollar question. Of course he didn’t love you, he had tormented you for years. Your dad’s “theory” was right, the lovedust didn’t matter if he had loved you beforehand. It could’ve been anyone. 

So even if you might’ve known all along, why did it hurt and why were you upset?

“ Stop lying to me. You never cared about me, you loved humiliating me,” You said in a shaky breath,” you loved seeing me cry and you loved it when I got mad. I could see it all across your face, you loved making me absolutely miserable. So you can say you love me all you want now, but I know the truth. You don’t understand, this lovedust is ruining me, Peter. Do you know how painful it is to be tormented for years and all of a sudden, the same person is now in love with you just like that?” 

“ Ruining you? You didn’t touch the damn thing! And you want to talk about pain-Do you know how painful it is to love you?” Peter shouted as he felt his voice crack,” If I’m not near you, I feel like I’m going to die but when I’m around you, my chest feels like it’s going to burst open and it’s painful. I’m in pain right when I wake up in the morning to right before I go to sleep everyday because the mere thought of you drives me insane-” 

“ I didn’t ask for you to love me-”

“ I didn’t ask to love you either!” Peter shouted back louder, this time to make sure you would stop interrupting him,” My body feels weak all the time, I’m fucking falling apart because I love you so much. So don’t tell me that I’m lying about loving you because that’s all I feel when I look at you. Even when I’m pissed off I still love you but if you think for one second I’m going to sit here and let you attack me for my past that I have already apologized for, then I don’t want to hear it.” 

Peter gave you one last look before getting out of your car and straight into the rain. Peter slammed the car door behind him so hard to where the door completely fell off the hinges but Peter was so angry that he kept walking away. 

“ You fucking...ugh!” You screamed as you got out of your car and followed behind him. 

You were completely livid, you both were being unfair but just because he was going through a different type of pain than you didn’t mean yours hurt any less. 

You shouted after Peter but the rain was so loud to the point where you considered that maybe he just couldn’t hear you. You sped up your pace to the point where you almost slipped against the concrete. 

“ You don’t get to tell me that I can’t be mad at the past Peter when it’s only been a week since you got infected!” You yelled as you grabbed Peter’s arm to stop him from walking away from you,” Just because you apologized doesn’t mean I can let it go so easily. For years, you made me feel like I would be alone for the rest of my life because no one would ever love me!”

Peter whipped his head back around to face you as you kept a strong grip around his wrist,“ And I’m telling you now that I love you and I was a fucking idiot for hurting you. Jesus Y/N I am sorry but we’ve had this conversation before so why are you mad at me?” 

All you could focus on were his eyes, which were darting back and fourth across your face as if he was pleading with you. You had pushed him across the line so many times but now, Peter was pushing back because he just needed a clear answer. 

You both were tired of yelling and fighting and in this moment, Peter was so close to tearing down the walls you had set up for years to keep yourself safe against him. It was eating away at you because deep down, you knew why you were mad at him, you just didn’t know if you could bring yourself to let it slip out of your mouth.

The rain sounded muffled and all you could think about was how cold you were feeling. You were somewhat forcing yourself to focus on anything other than Peter but you were trapped in his desperate gaze. 

You felt your breath hitch as you could feel yourself getting choked up,” I’m mad...I’m mad because the way you feel about me right now, it’s fleeting... it’s temporary. One day when you’re cured, you’re going to stop loving me and that terrifies me.” 

Peter squeezed your hand and you didn’t even realize that while you were talking, the grip you had around his wrist had moved to interlock your fingers with his. You could feel your chest tighten as you moved your eyes down to your hands and you slowly moved your gaze to meet Peter’s. 

“ Why does it terrify you?” Peter asked softly and now it was your turn to plead with him using your eyes as if you were saying please don’t make me say it.

Maybe a part of Peter knew that you wouldn’t admit that maybe, there was something developing between the two of you that you just couldn’t bring yourself to admit. But Peter knew you well and even as he read you like a book, he wanted to hear it for himself. 

“ I’m terrified because…” You almost said it as a whisper and even Peter was having a hard time hearing you because his heart was beating so loudly,” because I…”

You swallowed hard as you looked down at his lips and even if it was just for a second, Peter caught you staring. Peter felt his knees weaken and he was seconds away from just pulling you into his arms but it was your move. 

Peter had given you all the power and while a part of him felt relieved, it didn’t stop him from reaching up and tucking a strand of wet hair behind your ear. This was the moment he had been waiting for. 

He had given you all of the puzzle pieces you needed except he saved the last one just for you. He wanted you to put the last piece in so that way you two could step back together and admire all of the hard work you put into it. 

 You would’ve. You were going to let him know everything and unravel in his arms because finally, you could let go.

You wanted nothing more than to pick up that stupid puzzle piece and slam it into the puzzle to show him you were serious. You were going to let your walls crumble down and for once, you were going to be fearless. 

But you just couldn’t bring yourself to do it. 

“ I can’t,” You said softly as you let go of Peter’s hand and practically rushed back towards the building,  leaving Peter alone in the rain. 

@eridanuswave​ @juliet-winterson​ @akacalumtrash​ @ilovepeterparker13​

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[still-a-morosexual-help]

OBEY ME! LESSON 52 DETAILED SUMMARY + THEORIES

Two locked lessons :( hopefully telling where the fuck Mammon & Luke have been

Lucifer’s immediately suspicious of them, asking who they are and whose in charge of them. MC points at their obviously non-angelic clothes and says they’re angels while Satan says Simeon’s their guardian (weren’t Simeon & Lucifer really close back then? Wouldn’t he have told Lucifer if he got new angels?). He says it’s good luck then that he ran into a seraph’s assistants as he dumbs a load of books on them and says ‘I’m a seraph assist me’ or rather ‘carry these books to the library for me’ – Satan gets ready to protest but Lucifer cut him off saying that assuming they really are angels they’d know who he was (really didn’t like that ‘assuming you really are angels bit’) meaning his orders are not optional so get to work. Satan silently glares at him. Lucifer complains about how this is not even his job but Raphael’s who’s been picking on Lucifer to get back for how much shit his brother’s cause (I’ve so many HCs about Raphael and Michael. Raphael I always see as stoic and stiff who gets into those aggressively polite, passive-aggressive, thin lipped smile, voices hissed out and cutting, arguments with Lucifer about his brothers and punishing them adequately. Considering Michael is supposed to be somewhat childish personality wise and Raphael is serious I also see them having a relationship very similar to Diavolo and Lucifers’, With Raphael being Michael’s weary but fond handler). Satan says if his brothers are acting out then maybe Lucifer’s just bad at supervising them, MC sighs and sympathises with the tone of someone who has lived through the exact same experience which Lucifer immediately picks up and comments on. Beel’s been sneaking food, Belphie keeps escaping to the human world and even though they’re relatively minor things their frequency makes them add up and Raphael won’t stop being snide and sarcastic about it. Satan cuts off Lucifer’s ranting about how terrible Raphael is (given that outside of his brothers Simeon’s the only one Lucifer seems close with in the Celestial Realm and knowing Lucifer he’d never unload his troubles on to his brothers in fear of being seen as not being in control, and Beel mentioned Lucifer usually stuck to staying inside the Celestial Palace it makes sense that he desperately needs someone to rant to) saying that Lucifer complains too much and if he’s so happy here maybe he should just leave the celestial realm and head to – but he’s cut off by Lucifer saying “for an angel you really seem ready to start shit huh” and I’m pretty sure he knows :) Satan just silently glares back. Lucifer tries to tell them what the organising system in the library is but Satan cuts him off saying he can see what it is by just looking and then he diverts his attention to psychoanalysing Lucifer, asking if Lucifer’s pushing them around cause Raphael pushes him around. Lucifer ignores the last part saying no matter how much sully seems like he wants to tear Lucifer’s head off he’s skilful and knows his way around books, when Satan only glares back he asks if Satan likes books to which he replies that every book in this library is precious. Lucifer laments about how none of his brothers like books despite how much he tries to get them into reading and that there’s no one he knows who he can talk to about them since Michael “overcomplicates things and twists them into something they’re not” (do you think Michael has started his Lucifer shrine at this point or does that happen after the fall?) and Raphael “who’s snide and generally unpleasant” (God if they do introduce the angels I desperately want them to be dicks. Like give me one person who’s an asshole that’s not hiding a secret soft side, I want someone who looks at MC sneers and then continues to never fall in love with them) though there is Simeon who’s the most normal of them. He says his life would be easier if he had someone like Sully for a brother (poor Satan’s probably going through a crisis rn). Lucifer says that Satan can look around and pick any book he wants and even points him towards a section meant only for seraph. Satan hesitantly picks up one and asks for permission and Lucifer notes he’s a fan of art. After they’re done Lucifer calls Satan close to look at a particularly interesting book with a blank cover. There’s a flash of bright white light and chains burst from inside the book and wrap around Satan who gets immediately pissed off, demanding what’s happening (earning their trust just to flip on them like that!? Specially satan!? The years of progress that just undid!?) Does he already know Satan is a demon? I mean they’re both pretty suspicious either way but I’m pretty sure he won’t take them to the other higher ups considering how he spoke about them and I’m 100% sure if this was pre-Diavolo angel!Lucifer he would have killed Satan on the spot without bothering to trap him.

Satan yells at Lucifer to do something (I don’t know if it’s sweet or sad that no matter how much Satan pretends to hate Lucifer in the end he absolutely believes Lucifer would never do anything to hurt him and would help him if he was in trouble even when Satan’s usual logic should tell him that Lucifer intentionally gave him the book). Lucifer says it makes sense that Satan got caught and when MC tries to help him Satan tells them to stay back cause he doesn’t want them to get caught either. Lucifer says the book is alive and catches evil beings and the harder you struggle the tighter the chains get (don’t you think Evil has two meanings in the OM! World? The brothers and the demons in general are referred to as evil a lot but when it comes down to it they’re all good people – heavily flawed with pretty loose morals – but more or less good people certainly not bad enough to be called evil. Evil tm seems to be what all demons naturally are but that it seems to have nothing to do with the puppy kicking, baby eating, mass murder you’d usually associate with the term. So yeah two different meanings. I think technically inanimate objects like the book would react to the natural Evil tm in the brothers and actual people like the angels will associate that natural Evil tm with the normal evil we all know and thus believe all demons are puppy kicking, baby eating, mass murderers). Lucifer said he would have known if Simeon got two angels (BOOM!) and that he knew from the beginning they weren’t angels (just look at their freaky ass non-white coloured clothes!). Satan says Lucifer playing dirty is something that has never changed. Lucifer says he has no fucking clue what Satan’s talking about and then looks at MC and says “wtf are you anyway” when MC answers he says that Michael’s being interested in a human sorcerer recently but guesses that’s not MC, he says they’re obviously not a demon or angel but doesn’t seem to believe the human thing fully too because he again asks and emphasises, “Interesting…What are you, exactly…” (This is the second time OM!’s implied MC’s not fully human, demon or angel with the first being in a devilgram. In my first ever HC list I said I see MC as a hybrid of the three while still being mostly human – because when Lilith died she was no longer an angel but she wasn’t fully a demon either and that particular magic unique to only her travelled with her when she reincarnated and then travelled unnoticed through her descendants and was magnified after MC made pacts with the 7 brothers and started sharing their powers). Satan latches on to that, stating MC’s not a demon so Lucifer should only be interested in him but that piques Lucifer’s interest more and he moves closer to MC because why would a demon protect someone else. MC tells Lucifer to let Satan go (and it’s said in a way where it’s implied it’s an order not an option and MC’s a little insane right?) Satan says there’s no point trying to get Lucifer to listen before he transforms into his demon form saying Lucifer never listens, to which Lucifer is silent (Y’all really need to talk after all this is over), before he says there’s no need for Satan to lose his temper and that Lucifer would let them go which obviously shocks Satan. Lucifer releases Satan who asks what Lucifer’s new plot is. Lucifer’s like “wow you have zero trust in me” and Satan’s like “bitch, I have negative trust in you”. Lucifer says there’s no plots and Satan says he’s lying. Lucifer says that the old him would have drop kicked a demon on site and wouldn’t have released them just so they could talk. And what does Lucifer want to talk about? His new demon boo <3 ugh sorry “acquaintance”. He says he never would have imagined he’d have a demon as an acquaintance but here we are. Lucifer says he’s strange, that he doesn’t act like a demon and that the more they talk the less he understands him but that he likes talking to him and there’s a certain feeling he gets from talking to Diavolo similar to the one he gets when talking to Satan (familiarity? Belonging? Kinship? Affection?) and I can’t believe we went from Lucifer complaining about his co-workers to him asking advice about what sounds like his first crush. Lucifer says he also wants to know more about Satan and that he only used the book to make sure he actually was a demon and he asks Satan to forgive him, Satan is silent and contemplative. Lucifer says he’s answered Satan’s questions and isn’t there something that Satan should say to him, more specifically, “thank you for releasing me”. Satan mumbles under his breath “holy shit I can’t believe you made me believe you were nice! You’re as nasty as ever” but still flushes red and says thanks. Lucifer’s pleased by it and says that for his good manners he won’t report anything to Michael but in return they have to follow him again.

Lucifer leads them back to a rooftop? where the brothers are. Mammon says Lucifer’s late and that Beel ate the food they’d left aside for him, while Belphie complains about how after Lucifer told all of them not to be late he was. Lucifer smiles and tells Belphie to not get mad about it in exchange for Lucifer ignoring that Belphie slept on the job. Belphie says that’s playing dirty. Asmo & Levi say that considering all the work Lucifer has these days they shouldn’t be mad at him, they then ask why Satan left and that they were worried about him & MC. Belphie asks since when were they friends with Lucifer, A red faced Satan says they’re not. Beel happily points out that Satan’s face is progressively turning more red and Satan says that all the eggs Beel ate contained reddite and it was fucking up his eyesight and this exactly the sort of BS I’d say to my brother to get him off my back the om! Team writes sibling relationships so well???? Beel questions about reddite and Satan just goes balls deep with the lie, creating a new disorder, explaining how it works and what the permanent effects are to which Beel immediately starts panicking until Belphie says Satan’s just being a lil’ shit. Simeon congratulates MC on their therapy skills but MC says it’s Lucifer who did everything. Simeon says Lucifer shouldn’t get all the credit (because yeah honestly sometimes just having someone to sit with you and hold your hand even if you don’t talk goes a long way when you’re having a bad time). Mammon asks Lucifer why he called them all here. Lucifer uses magic and suddenly the sky daylit sky outside is replaced by the stars and moon and night sky. Lucifer says Michael made Raphael remodel the room (so they’re in the observatory?) to show the human sky as well and Lucifer wanted to check it out before Michael had the chance. All the brothers are in awe. MC asks if Michael will be pissed that Lucifer checked out what is clearly his room first and Lucifer says he doesn’t give a flying fuck about it. Belphie’s thrilled and asks if anyone knows any stories about the constellations, Satan says he knows about every single one. Asmo asks him to tell them and he starts pointing out stars first the three stars forming the triangle of Betelgeuse, then Cator and Pollux – gemini - who are incredibly close and are like peas in a pod which the twins instantly claim as their own, and then orion. Simeon is happy that Satan looks so happy.

Mc is later woken up by Satan, with the others already asleep around the room, he says the stupid faces they make when they sleep hasn’t changed over the years. MC notes that Simeon and Lucifer are missing and asks about it. He says he has no idea and that they must have gone off together, he then asks them to keep quiet about what they saw here when they got back home. MC’s not on board with that and says there’s nothing to be embarrassed about, Satan blushes says he’s not but that the brothers will tease him but in the end he’s happy they came here. He thanks MC and they say they’re just happy seeing him being so happy and he calls them mean for teasing him, the twins start moving around in bed and end up in weird positions – Satan fondly complains about that never changing and how they wouldn’t survive without him and goes to straighten them out. MC goes to find Lucifer and Simeon. They then eavesdrop on them talking in the forest. Lucifer says that Simeon looks really good as a human and Simeon says coming from Lucifer that’s a grand compliment. He then says he knows that none of this is real but that he’s truly happy he got to see Lucifer like this one more time. Lucifer asks what he’s talking about considering Simeon sees him so much every day that Lucifer figures Simeon would be sick of him and that nothing is going to change. “This is who we are. And who we’ll be forever” (and this whole thing is so fucking bittersweet and I forget that Simeon lost all his closest friends in the Celestial Realm in one fell sweep and then went through whatever unknown events got him demoted). Simeon looks sad for just a moment before he smiles and says, “Forever, huh…That’s such a wonderful word, but so very fragile.” (actual tears rn). Simeon says he knows Lucifer’s met Diavolo by now and that he’s felt lingering doubt crawl into his heart so when Lucifer says forever even he himself is not sure if he means it (this also explains one of the reasons why Simeon isn’t Diavolo’s biggest fan because while leaving was definitely the brothers’ decision he probably unconsciously or lowkey resents Diavolo for putting the thought into Lucifer’s head and showing him that leaving was an available option) Lucifer stutters and doesn’t know what to say to that. (Okay so ik that some of y’all see the “brothers no more” chat name and see Lucifer and Simeon brothers but I’ve always considered that to mean “brothers in arms”? Not actual siblings? One, because Lucifer would never have left one of his siblings behind, no matter how much they kicked and screamed and refused to leave he would have dragged them down to the Devildom with him. Two, Lucifer treats Simeon as an equal something he doesn’t do to his brothers. With his brothers he’s overprotective and condescending, controlling and overbearing. He’s basically helicopter-parenting and you can clearly see that he doesn’t treat them as equals unlike the way he treats Simeon. Third there’s a clear distance between Simeon and the brothers. I mean they’re all really close but the brothers don’t treat Simeon the same way they treat each other or even the way they treat Lucifer – there always seems to be an underlying layer of respect. I mean sure they respect Lucifer and each other (hard as it may be to see) but they can also call Lucifer and each other ‘dickheads’ to the face something I don’t see them doing with Simeon. The brothers’ relationship with Simeon, I see in the same way I’d treat the composed sweet close friend of a sibling who is much much much older than me. So yeah I see Simeon as being Lucifer’s childhood friend, where they grew up in each other’s pockets, went to war together and fought alongside each other and ended up working in the same place in similar positions).

MC wakes up to someone shaking them and calling their name (you can choose it to be either Luke or Mammon. Because I’m a sim: ) Mammon gives a short relieved laugh when they wake up, asking them what they’re doing sleeping in the middle of the forest and how no matter how much he shook them they didn’t wake up and how he was worried. Satan says they’re back in the real world and Mammon asks them wtf they’re talking about saying he doesn’t remember anything, MC asks where they were and says they were worried. Neither Luke nor Mammon remember anything and didn’t even remember disappearing, saying they walked in the HoL and the next minute they were back to standing in the forest. Mammon and Luke have a brief argument about how they might have actually been in danger and the word chihuahua is thrown and protested to until Mammon remembers and asks what the other two are doing here and MC explains how and why they came here. Luke says okay “but when you say you tripped balls and had a shared hallucination what exactly do you mean…” Satan shuts that down quickly. Luke asks what even happened. Simeon hands him a pamphlet where the whole section about the HoL is gone, in its place is a passage about rumours of fairies who lure people and tease and torment them. Satan says it’s a miracle they made it out alive. Simeon says it’s because of the hawthorn berry powder Satan is covered in because fairies are very fond of hawthorn berries and as a thank you to Satan for bringing it to them they showed him something he’d always wanted to experience. This line makes Mammon & Luke even more curious and Satan threatens Simeon not to say a word but he forgot MC’s a shithead so they begin, “So we found ourselves in the Celestial Realm –“ before Satan cuts them off, telling them to shut up and threatening them with him going to Lucifer and telling him a whole list of bad things Mammon did whether they’re true or not and azkcjbscjwzx I can’t believe Satan just called MC a simp like that right to their face in front of everyone what the fuuuuuuck!????? Mammon oblivious loveable idiot that he is doesn’t understand why he’s being threatened. Simeon reminds them of why they even came out here and MC remembers the fairies/fairy rings, Mammon laments not been able to get their treasure and Luke calls him evil for wanting to steal it. Mammon says treasure or fairy rings it’s still the same but Luke vehemently protests against that. Mammon does note that despite running into fairies there doesn’t seem to be any fairy rings around and Simeon says they may have to give up for now, Satan agrees saying after all the emotional upheaval he’s exhausted. Both Luke and Mammon are really disappointed. (So about the vision/hallucination/reality they saw it reminded me of that thing Dumbledore said in the last Harry Potter book when they were in Kings Cross station. Something about how just because it’s a dream doesn’t mean it’s not real.)

Back in the train station Mammon and Luke are still sulking and MC says at least they had fun together, mammon agrees minus the part at the end that turned into a scene from a horror movie. Satan asks Simeon why he’s smirking, Simeon says he’s remembering how adorable Satan had looked while he was teaching his brothers the constellations for the first time and how he wished real Lucifer was there to see it. Satan demands that none of this goes back to Lucifer. Simeon laughs evilly and MC says Lucifer would be so happy if he knew and Satan – red-faced – says that’s exactly why he doesn’t want Lucifer to know and sighs about how satan still can’t admit to how much he loves Lucifer. Simeon says that it’s a special opportunity considering this particular group don’t get to travel together that often but Mammon still sulks until he’s back on the train and fawning over how good the food is. Luke calls mammon a simpleton for how easily his moods flip-flop (hey???? I take offense to that) and mammon snaps back at him, Luke says since Mammon’s always talking about him like he’s a dog he doesn’t get to complain and Simeon laughs about how close they seem, Satan’s confused by Simeon’s definition of close and MC says you tend to fight more with people you’re closer to (which yeah it’s true for me at least. I’d always argue with someone I’m close to vs someone I just know and they’re never serious arguments either just stupid shit that you can trade friendly-rude barbs over). Luke says he’d never be close with a demon like Mammon and Mammon says for such a small kid Luke’s got a big mouth, Luke bites back and they continue. Simeon tells MC if they thought they could get rest on the train back they’re greatly mistaken cause Simeon was only able to book 4 rooms so two of them will have to share and that immediately stops Luke & Mammon’s argument. MC feels all of their eyes boring into them before they all start volunteering to share a room with MC. Luke suggests they draw straws or play rock-paper-scissors to decide, Mammon suggests cards but Satan says that he can see in Mammon’s eyes that he plans on cheating and an argument breaks out making the others on the train turn to stare at them and this time MC genuinely seems to consider jumping off a moving train instead they command the demons to stay. Simeon says that never stops being funny and Luke says it actually looks painful and ik MC only uses it when things are getting out of hand and they aren’t listening to reason and are causing a scene that can lead to a (usually) public brawl but the command to stay still feels icky to me.

In the corridor MC finds a silent sad looking Simeon and asks him what’s wrong. Simeon tries to deflect it, gets oddly scatter brained about where he put down his tea, says that even though rock-paper-scissors was a fair was to decide he’s disappointed but the look on Mammon & Luke’s faces when they found out they would be sharing was worth it. MC picking up on how all over the place he seems asks if something is bothering him. He says not really but sort of? He says Satan wasn’t the only one impacted by the whole Celestial Realm fever dream and that seeing the brothers as angels again brought back happy memories until he remembered that they aren’t there anymore and that the Celestial Realm is different now which made him depressed. MC hugs them and Simeon says they’re warm and smell comforting before he thanks them he then blushes and says he would like to kiss them and MC gets the chance to either tell him to go ahead or to gently say “No, Simeon…” he understands that there’s someone else and that whoever that is he’s very lucky. He then gives them the star of patience and tells them they’re gonna be an amazing sorcerer. Simeon says he wished he could’ve had MC as a guardian angel and MC goes “wait…do angels even have guardian angels!?” and Simeon says …no. He then wishes them goodnight.

On the way to bed MC hears voices from the roof and goes to check it out only to find the other 3. The three of them are arguing about constellations. Mammon points out Scorpius correctly and calls Orphiuchus next to it the scorpion bearer, Luke says it’s the goat bearer, Mammon says “what even is the difference between scorpions and goats, Satan says they’re both wrong and MC says it’s the serpent bearer. They pull MC down beside them and Luke says Satan was telling them about the seven sisters and asks if they know what it’s called. MC gets to answer. Mammon asks if there’s a seven brother’s constellation and Luke says there is one in the Celestial Realm, with everyone knowing about the legend behind the constellation being about the brothers’ fall. Mammon asks what they’re like and Luke says they’re seven bright stars with three others watching over them. Luke says he doesn’t know what the three stars are supposed to represent and Mammon suggests it might be Michael, Luke says that’d be weird cause Michael only has two eyes so what’s the third one, Mammon suggests it could be like Michael’s nostril or something and I’m in genuine tears over this, my chest hurts from how much I laughed, Luke says that’s stupid and MC who is actually just as stupid as Mammon but who is also much better at hiding it suggest two eyes and a mouth, Luke goes “…heeeeh?” finally realising one of his role models is a dumbass before he starts protesting asking why the two of them are so fixated on it being two eyes, Satan suggests that they might represent demons, angels and humans and luke says that feels right (personally I think they’re Michael, Raphael and Simeon) Mammon suggests the human star would be MC and Satan agrees. (okay so I think the seven brothers stars are completely BS. Why? Because Michael and the angels had no idea Satan existed. Hell even Lucifer didn’t know until Satan was born after they fell. Michael would have had no relationship with Satan, hell they’ve never even met, for him to be sentimental and it makes no sense that a place Satan has never really been to would have a star for him. They would have a star for Lilith though. That makes sense. But the story of Lilith’s death and probably even her existence seems to be very securely hidden away considering even Luke who’s so close with Michael doesn’t seem to know why the brothers fell. The angels wouldn’t have named stars after the brothers immediately after their fall and it would have taken time for them all to heal, reach a place of forgiveness and start to grieve and miss what they’d lost. So I bet by this time, the news that there was a seventh brother had come up and the angels in the know jumped at the chance to use him as a cover story for the seventh star rather than admit a girl was killed over falling in love and then using her powers to heal a human. So yeah. The seven brothers stars feel like utter BS. Seven siblings on the other hand…). Mammon tells Luke to hurry up and get on with it and Luke gives MC the star of generosity. Luke thanks them for everything, saying that though they didn’t find a fairy ring he had fun and made good memories, he then thanks them for always being there for them all.

[xaharadesert]

Oblivious MC - Headcanon

Arcana Characters (Main 5) x MC

*Nadia in an upcoming post*

A/N: Yay, more headcanons! I know these are slow but the new school system is kicking my butt. This next one is for the amazing @genderless-plant-likes-thearcana! They come up with lots of cool ideas for prompts to send to various writers, so you should definitely check out their profile! They came up with a super cute prompt this time; an MC who is super oblivious to their LI’s romantic interest in them! I really appreciate the specifics added in the request, they really helped me out! Thank you! While you’re reading you may notice the headcanons get a bit goofier as they though ;) my bad, but this prompt was too fun. Another side note: I ran out of bullet points and couldn’t fit Nadia into this post, so she’ll be getting her own! As always, I recognize Asra’s non-binary gender orientation but will be using he/him pronouns :) Please let me know if there are any spelling or grammar mistakes! Requests are open :)

❤️Julian❤️

He’s so in love with you

Like, more in love with you than he ever has been with anyone else

But he’s also insecure as heck

So when he starts dropping obvious hints about wanting to be in a relationship with you, and you just don’t get it...

He starts to think that maybe you only like him as a friend

I mean, he’s not being subtle at all

He flirts with you constantly, he sends you winks in the middle of a theatre rehearsal, he almost always has a hand on your should or back to guide you through the busier parts of Vesuvia...

Once he even stood up on a table in the middle of the Rowdy Raven and sang you a love song at the top of his lungs

You just thought he was being dramatic, as always

To you, Julian was an incredible friend

I mean, you maaay have had a teeeensy little crush on him, but he was such a sweetheart that you didn’t want to ruin the friendship you two had

You went on adventures together, you attended his theatre performances, and he did his best to support you in all your magical endeavours

Overall, the dynamic the two of you had was already incredible

And neither of you really wanted to ruin that

When Julian started thinking that maybe you only liked him as a friend he decided to be “selfless” and simply keep his feelings to himself

Of course, that would never work for long

Julian was a man of passion and, possible consequences be damned, he wanted you to know how he felt

So one day, when the two of you were at the Rowdy Raven together and he was tipsy enough to do something stupid, he stood up on the table and loudly announced his undying love for you

Believe me, even for Julian it was dramatic

It was a long speech about how amazing he thought you were, including vivid descriptions about each and every thing about your personality, appearance, and hobbies that he loved

So needless to say you needed cut him off a bit early so that the two of you wouldn’t be there all night

Unfortunately the first thought in your mind upon hearing this was “oh my stars he’s under some kind of spell”

You immediately dragged him out of the tavern and back to the magic shop to find some sort of cure, muttering theories under your breath the entire way

Julian, of course, was not under a spell and was feeling rather put out by your response to his confession

He wasn’t entirely sure where the two of you were going because you hadn’t bothered to share your suspicions with him (why would you? You thought he was being influenced by magic)

When the two of you reached your shop and you started skimming through books he finally asked what you were doing, seeming understandably surprised by the turn of events

You hesitated a bit, not knowing if it was worth explaining this to him, but settled on a brief explanation of “you’re under some kind of love potion and I need to break it” with a side of “please don’t do anything dumb while I try to help you”

Julian of course was, again, fairly shocked to hear this

A spell? What spell? He had been in love with you for months! There was no way it was a spell!

With his mind racing a mile a minute he finally realized what was going on

You were just really, really, REALLY oblivious to his feelings

This revelation caused him to laugh out loud, likely startling you out of your searching

When you looked at him in confusion and a bit of concern he only laughed louder, bending over and wheezing a bit

It took a while for him to calm down, even with your panicked response to his sudden change of emotion

When he was finally done laugiinh and had wiped the tears from his eyes he gave you the biggest grin he was possible of giving

He did his best to explain that no, he was not under a spell, no, he was not joking, and yes, he really did love you as more than a friend

He swears, the look on your face was worth the emotional rollercoaster he had been through that night

And you? Well, you probably needed a minute to process everything that he had just revealed

Of course, the feelings of love were mutual and you said as much when you could finally form words again

Julian was thrilled to hear that you loved him back

The two of you would be happy for many years to come, and even if Julian occasionally teased you about your obliviousness you could never truly be mad at him for it

🧡Portia🧡

She’s super open about just how much she loves you

Portia sees no reason to hide her true feelings, so she’s often very blunt about them

She’ll drop a “you’re gorgeous” or “I wanna kiss you” into a casual conversation like it’s nothing

But you somehow manage to not pick up on it

So of course, Portia doubles her efforts

She bakes you cookies in the shape of hearts, bring you nice flowers on her days off, and take you on what she considers dates, just waiting for you to pick up on her love for you

And yet none of this gets through to you

You think this is how Portia is with everyone

She was cheeky from the moment you met her, so when she tells you she wants to kiss you you just assume she’s joking

Everything else seems to just be an awesome friendship

Obviously Portia is super cute, and obviously dating her would be tons of fun, but there’s obviously NO WAY she could ever be interested in you like that... right?

Portia eventually starts to think you’re just messing with her

There’s no way you could be that oblivious

You definitely had to know she was into you, and you were just playing hard to get

She knows you have feelings for her too, the two of your wouldn’t be as close as you were otherwise

But, no offence, she’s getting a bit impatient

So she decides to just do what needs to be done

The two of you were walking through the market near your shop one day when she grabbed your arm to stop you in the middle of the crowd

She turned you so that you were facing her, looked you straight in the eye, and told you she loved you with the most serious expression you had ever seen on her face

As oblivious as you may be, there was no way for you to misinterpret this as anything other than the truth

Except there was

You assumed she was under a love spell

After the initial shock of finding out your friend was being influenced by magic was over, you immediately dragged her back to your shop without a word

Portia kinda thought you two were going home to make out and she was totally down with it

But when you entered the shop and started digging through your supplies, looking for something, she realized that maybe SHE had misinterpreted

She asked you what you were doing and nearly burst out laughing at the response

You thought she was under a spell? Seriously? You were actually that oblivious the whole time?

She thought it was the most hilarious thing she had heard in a long time

Eventually she managed to calm down enough to reassure you that, no, she was not under a spell

But of course you didn’t believe her, and thought that it was the spell talking

You went back to searching for an antidote while Portia continued trying to prove to you that she was genuinely in love with you

She listed the first time she realized she loved you, the first time she had said it to you to no response, the first time she had wanted to kiss you

She talked about how much she loved every part of you, from your personality, to your hobbies, to your insanely cool magic

Portia was nowhere near as dramatic as her brother could be, but she was very open about her love for you

Finally, you seemed to realize that she was telling the truth (no magic involved)

In turn, you confessed your feelings toward her as well

She gave you a bit of a sly grin and asked how she could be certain you weren’t under some magic spell

To this you responded by kissing her

So I guess she was right when she assumed you two were going back to your place to make out

The two of you were happy from then on, although Portia never let you forget just how dense you were

💛Lucio💛

It’s hard to imagine anyone could be so oblivious about his feelings

Lucio is the most in-your-face about his love for you

He leaves absolutely no room for doubt, which means it’s even more incredible that you don’t seem to get it

He has asked you to marry him about half a dozen times and you keep??? Laughing?? About it????

Doesn’t understand what’s happening

Nobody has ever done this sort of thing to him before, so his mind just blanks if he thinks about it too much

I mean there’s no way you could dislike him, right? You definitely return his feelings... RIGHT?

He’s insecure, but he’ll never admit that

Instead, he chooses to continue his over-the-top dramatic proposals and confessions until you say yes

On the other hand, you don’t really know what’s happening either

You know that Lucio’s a bit... strange, but this is a lot even for him

You start to think that maybe it’s his way of dealing with his feelings now that Nadia’s left him

So you decide to keep being a great friend to help him get through it!

And if that means wading through a bunch of strange emotional obstacles, then so be it!

(Lucio’s in the background banging his head against a wall in frustration)

It’s not like he doesn’t enjoy just being friends with you; he loves having someone around who genuinely cares about him

It’s just that he wants more

He hires people to build giant statues of you (which may be in poor taste, but who cares), he buys or sponsors all of your favourite shops, he always makes sure you get the best of everything

To you, this just seems like Lucio overcompensating for his previous “oopsies”

But one day it occurs to him that maybe you don’t understand his feelings because he’s going about it the wrong way

You’re pretty much immune to his dramatic proposals, so maybe he should try the opposite

So he put together a little plan

It wasn’t a particularly special night; no big occasion to be celebrated

He took you out to the balcony and leaned against the railing, looking oddly serious for someone who had no concept of emotional maturity

He took his time to prepare himself before speaking rather slowly and quietly in comparison to his usual tone

Lucio told you that he loved you, and he left no room for arguement

He didn’t embellish his words in any way, knowing that something simple would be the most likely way to get your attention

And boy did it work

You immediately assumed he was under some sort of spell

I mean Lucio? Acting like a normal person?? No way

You panicked right away and made a run for it, leaving Lucio behind on the balcony in your hurry to leave

Lucio, of course, was shocked, and more than a little offended to have been left so abruptly

People didn’t just leave him places without a good explanation

So obviously he chased you, yelling after you as you did your best to navigate the palace on your way to the library

Unfortunately for you, Lucio is surprisingly athletic and managed to catch you before you reached the door

He untactfully grabbed your arm, which caused you to scream, which caused him to scream, which caused everything to become even more of a mess than before

The two of you were just standing in the middle of the hall, screaming at each other

You wanted to find a way to free Lucio from whatever spell he was under, and Lucio wanted to know why you were running away

When you both calmed down (you being the first, of course), you explained your theory, which wounded Lucio’s ego even more than before

Lucio in return, replied in a not-so-polite manner, asking if you really thought he was stupid enough to be put under some dumb spell

Yes

Yes you did

Lucio had to explain his entire thought process behind confessing in such a normal way, which was pretty embarrassing from his perspective

But to you, it likely came across as sweet as it finally dawned on you that yes, he really was in love with you

The two of you probably had to immediately follow up the confession with a talk about whether or not he was serious about getting married

He was, but he didn’t want to make you feel awkward so he denied it

You two agreed to take things a little slower than he originally planned

The relationship was slightly awkward for the first few days, because neither of you quite understood what had happened the night of the confession

But either way, the two of you were happy, and that was all that mattered

(Although, when Lucio eventually asked you to marry him again it was just as chaotic and messy as the first time)

💚Muriel💚

Oh no, this won’t end well

Muriel is almost the epitome of insecure, so flirting is pretty much impossible for him

He tried a couple of times to be more forward, but when you didn’t respond to his advances he quickly backed down

He didn’t want to overstep, and immediately assumed you just wanted to be friends

Although, admittedly, he has seen other people flirt with you, and you don’t respond to them either

So maybe you’re just not interested in relationships? Or maybe you’re just as bad at flirting as he is

Either way, as much as he loved you, he didn’t push

From your perspective it would seem like Muriel just wanted to be friends

And frankly, anyone else around you would think the same thing

There was nothing particularly romantic about how Muriel acted around you

Arguably the boldest thing he was doing was spending so much time with you

But to you, this was simply a friendship

And of course, you greatly valued Muriel’s friendship

Once you had gotten past the rough exterior, you found that he was a giant sweetheart

He carved small wooden figures for you, and didn’t seem to mind spending time with you

Inanna loved you too, so that was a bonus

Your friendship with Muriel probably lasted much longer than it would have if either of you had any sense of romance

Neither of you tried to take things further because both of you were terrible at flirting and being flirted with

Eventually someone (Asra) had to step in and give Muriel a little push

Asra had known you for a long time, so he alerted Muriel to how oblivious you were and how to best confess his feelings

Muriel didn’t really want to confess at that point, because he didn’t want to make things awkward between you two if something went wrong

But his love for you outweighed his anxiety and he decided to do it anyway

It was a rather cold night, and the two of you were in his hut

You were both curled up by the fire (plus Inanna, of course), and you were telling Muriel a story about a particularly annoying customer from the day before

When you finished the story, a comfortable silence fell between you (which was something Muriel had always appreciated; silence with you was never awkward)

That was when Muriel took his chance and quietly told you he loved you

Except he said it too quietly and you didn’t hear him over the sound of the fire

I mean, you saw his lips move, and therefore asked him to repeat himself, but it was still quiet

Muriel hadn’t anticipated this, and accidentally repeated it in a voice that was much too loud for such a peaceful night

He immediately winced in embarrassment, only to be startled from it when you screamed

He had been anticipating rejection, but he thought a scream may have been a bit dramatic

But of course, you didn’t see it as a rejection; you thought Muriel was under a love spell

Why else would your quiet, anti-social friend suddenly confess to something you had never even seen him hint at before?

And more importantly, who had out the spell on him? Most people didn’t know about him, so it was either someone close to him, or someone EXTREMELY powerful.

You didn’t know which one was worse

You leaned forward, cupping his face in your hands and staring into his eyes, promising that you would help him

This only succeeded in confusing him, the poor man

He didn’t know what you were talking about, and you were starting to freak him out a little

When he asked if you were alright, you started to look confused too

You reminded him that he was the one under the spell, not you

Cue a chorus of confused “what?”s being exchanged by two confused people

In the end, Muriel realized that you had thought he was under a spell when he suddenly confessed

He blushed as red as a tomato and did his best to string together enough words to explain to you that he wasn’t

He genuinely loved you

He also quietly cursed Asra for making him confess, which suddenly helped a lot of pieces fit together for you

You nodded along and agreed that Asra’s meddling was problematic in this case

In the end the two of you spent a fair portion of the night just talking out your feelings and realizing that maybe you would like to be more than friends

Both of you were blushing a lot throughout the entire thing, and years later when the two of you were happy together, you mutually decided to never bring up how you had gotten together in the first place

Asra, however, had somehow found out, and was determined to never let either of you live it down

💙Asra💙

Subtlety? Never heard of it

Asra is the absolute best at letting you know just how much he loves you

Even despite your obliviousness, you are fully aware that he loves you

And of course, you love him back!

How could you not?

Except, the way you see it... it’s platonic love

And Asra is 100% okay with that!

You two share a heart, so he fully understands that you view the live that you two share as platonic

This doesn’t really bother him; as long as you’re alive and happy, that’s all that matters

He’s perfectly content to pursue a strong friendship with you

But of course, being the cheeky legend that he is, he has to slip in some flirting and teasing once in a while

He’ll wink at you in the middle of work, casually brush against you while passing you in the shop, and hold your hand as often as possible

But of course, you view this as friendship

Who doesn’t cuddle with their best friend literally every night? That’s totally normal

You couldn’t ask for a better friend than Asra; he’s always there when you need him and he somehow always seems to know how you feel

You’re incredibly grateful to know him, and you feel safe and comfortable living in the same space as him

Yep, definitely only friendship feelings

He shows his love in little ways to you every day

The two of you live together, so of course you will occasionally have a petty arguement and try to stay seperate for a while, but that doesn’t stop him

He’ll “forget” which chores are yours and do a couple for you, he’ll make your favourite drink “by accident” and then claim he isn’t thirsty, and he’ll casually send Faust into the same room as you if he thinks you’re crying

Overall, just a great partn- I mean friend

He doesn’t really feel the need to confess to you, but if he notices that you’re starting to feel a more romantic attraction toward him then he’ll definitely take advantage of that

If you only wanted to be friends, then, well, that was one thing

But if you wanted to be something more... then he was definitely more than okay with that as well

Asra didn’t exactly plan out how he would confess to you, and instead waited for what he felt was the right moment

He knew it would come eventually, and there was no real rush

So when the two of you were travelling together, and you were both stargazing late at night, the feeling struck him

You had just settled down from laughing at a joke when he gently tilted your chin so you were looking into his eyes

He told you he loved you, but there was certainly something more personal this time

But of course you were incredibly oblivious so you just grinned and said it back, not really thinking about it too much

Of course Asra knew you had missed the point, so when you went back to looking at the stars he propped himself up so he was leaning over you a bit and repeated it

This probably confused you a bit, but you said it back again, thinking that maybe this was some kind of game

He held back a laugh and tried again, this time putting more emphasis on the “love” part

You missed it, and repeated it back

At this point he was trying not to laugh, and knew that he had only one more try before he wouldn’t be able to hold it back

This time he tried explaining more thoroughly

He told you he loved you romantically; as in, a love that was more than platonic. Romantic, soulmate kind of love. Not friendship. Please get it this time.

Your mouth formed a perfect “o” as you finally got his point

For a brief moment, Asra felt relief, thinking that he had finally gotten his point across

Instead he received immediate and extreme panic as you quickly shoved him away. While screaming.

This certainly hadn’t gone as planned

He was desperately trying to calm you down while you rambled about every place you two had been on your trip, trying to locate a time where Asra could’ve been put under a love spell

Asra, of course, found this hilarious, and started laughing harder and harder while also trying to calm you down

This only caused you more distress, and soon there were tears streaming down your face while you tried to convince him that no, this wasn’t funny

He knew you were genuinely concerned about him, and he genuinely was trying to stop, but this had come out of nowhere and he didn’t really know how to respond either

Eventually, you both managed to calm down (but only the kind of calm where he would occasionally look at you and burst into giggles again)

He did his best- between giggle fits- to explain to you that he genuinely did love you and he definitely wasn’t under any spell

He told you that he had loved you for years, and that he always would

He also subtley pointed out that he had been flirting for years and you had just been completely oblivious

No confession would truly be complete without a bit of teasing

You probably felt a bit embarrassed, but he reassured you that it was just a part of your charm

Of course, you told him you felt the same, and the two of you went back to watching the stars, this time just a bit closer than before

From then on, not a whole lot changed in your relationship

The two of you were practically in a romantic relationship already, so really all that was different was a few more kisses and a slightly different intention behind the “I love you”s the two of you shared

[ohheyfullmetal]

some dumb bnha headcanons i wrote down during algebra last year

•uraraka floating to the ceiling and/or making furniture and other people do the same when she’s asleep

•shigaraki disintegrating doorknobs, toga thinks it’s hilarious, kurogiri has receipts with just,,,, DOORKNOBS

•that’s what afo really pays him for

•lmao like he pays him rest in peace oboro

•aizawa uses erasure unintentionally whenever he’s angry (or he does it on purpose because red eyes scare the kids and it brings him pleasure)

•dark shadow randomly joining in on class discussions and spilling tokoyami’s darkest secrets including his hawks shrine

•he and izuku make shrines together

•midoriya has freaky green lightening crackling up his arms and I’m trying to sleep, mr aizawa

•denki getting unnaturally jittery during thunderstorms. sometimes he causes a power outage.

•the man sucks the energy from power cables on a daily basis and charges his friends phones godbless

•katsuki’s banned from being sick because his sweat could cause the dorms to explode. same with his gym socks

•”why are these cats laying on me” -todoroki

•air conditioner and heater but he never feels like the right temperature, and it flares up (especially his ice) when he’s angry

•naomasa uses his quirk to his advantage whenever he can don’t lie

•he’ll know

•literally that’s his quirk

•sato is dorm mom, as we know, but,,, a quarter of UA’s budget is sugar for his cakes

•nezu gets some whenever sato bakes so he doesn’t really give a fuck that it’s taking all the school’s combat supplies

•momo shares her clothes with all of the girls especially ochako because the poor (no pun intended) girl is broke af

•tsuyu eats bugs and it freaks present mic and all might out but aizawa kind of vibes with it

•”TSU WHY ARE YOU LICKING YOUR EYES”

•kirishima accidentally using his quirk in his sleep and tearing his sheets by tossing and turning

•jirou has sensory overload and aizawa

has tea and blankets on standby send headcanon

•everyone loves shouji and he drinks respect women juice every day.

•he thinks he’s ugly but everyone loves him.

•sometimes his arms get in the way.

•doorways are a nightmare because his arms are so wide and he’s so fucking tall

•everyone just vibes with it tho

•secretly nicknamed kakashi

•”SHITTY NERDS HE’S OBVIOUSLY THAT STUPID GRUNT THAT KIDNAPPED PUSSY BOY SASUKE”

•”kacchan, you watch naruto?!”

•we know that mina sneezes acid

•that’s a recipe for disaster in itself

•sero loves this really old movie with this american hero named spiderman

•tape webshooters

•dispenser hair is brought into the shrine cult,,, but make it animal crossing

•”hey bakubro you really look like marshall”

•”WHAT THE HELL DID YOU SAY TO ME SHITTY HAIR I’LL KILL YOU AND STUPID DEKU”

•”kacchan i didn’t even say anything!”

•”YEAH, AND??”

•tokoyami has a grave for midoriya in the dorm courtyard just in case

•todoroki brings flowers there every day

•”um todoroki i’m not dead”

•”i know.”

•”what”

•aizawa puts all his kids in therapy

•mina’s therapist recommends television as a distraction

•”fuck” -aizawa

•the entire class ends up watching the entirety of subbed sofia the first

•aizawa kind of likes it tbh

•everyone screams when he mentions prince james at dinner: how the hELL DOES HE KNOW WHO THAT IS

•izuku nags bakugou to make katsudon every night bc it’s his favorite

•bakugou’s is really spicy like his mom’s, since inko learned the recipe from mitsuki

•sometimes bakugou WILL make katsudon for deku because he’s a closet softie and secretly feels bad for being so mean to izuku before everything at ua happened

•he won’t admit that but kirishima knows and thinks it’s sweet

•kiri is trying to get them to be friends again

•katsuki says NO. and dyes kirishima’s hair purple in retaliation

•in solidarity with shark boy, all of 1a dyes their hair purple

•even bakugou, eventually

•shinsou is really fucking confused

•the general studies classes think it’s because 1a wants shinsou in the hero course

•the support classes just think everyone in 1a is actually in love with shinsou because of his new abs

•i mean 👀

•izuku misses his mom :(

•at least he has his all might body pillow

•and all might who begs bakugou to burn it

•if it’s kacchan it won’t be suspicious

•”just ask for a hug kiddo I’m literally one building away???”

•1a adopts eri and she moves to the student dorms with her 19 siblings

•mineta literally just drops the hero course after the lov kidnaps bakugou he’s done with ua

•that’s what i did with my ap music theory class oops

•ua’s done with him

•kouta punches him in the balls on midoriya’s request

•he really is the future number one hero

•1a is slightly horrified because this is deku who cried over an ant dying

•actually he cries over everything

•which just makes them even more horrified

•but not opposed to it at all

•kirishima records it

•movie night is once a week and it’s the top pick

•shinsou moves to 1a with his “i have no intention of making friends” family

•rumours are it’s because of the whole hair dyeing incident

•no seriously, even aizawa participated, nezu had no choice at that point

•shinsou knows that it was just a prank that went too far but goes along with the rumors anyway just to fuck with people

•”yeah, i’m dating everyone in 1a”

•”WE KNEW IT”

•hatsume was the one who started that rumor btw

•eri has her newest big brother

•this one is very tired deku please force him to sleep

•mirio gets his quirk back and heads off to help at nighteye’s agency during school breaks

•but he comes back to visit 1a and eri so much that it’s like he’s not even gone

•halloween comes

•aizawa is dorothy from the wizard of oz because hizashi wanted to be toto

•all might risks his life

•”eraserhead! may i see those red heels of yours?!”

•he gets red eyes instead

•is it his quirk or are they just bloodshot??

•who knows

•shinsou dresses as “himself but happy” which is just foundation over his baggy eyes and a horrible yellow smiley face t-shirt

•eri is lemillion for all hallow’s eve and deku for halloween

•deku cries

•mirio also cries but only amajiki knows

•she tells aizawa that she had to be the heroes who rescued her this year, but promises she’ll dress as him next time because he’s her hero too

•aizawa cries to midnight and hizashi for three hours straight

•they didn’t even know he could cry

•hizashi freaks out because he thinks aizawa’s quirk malfunctioned or something and almost takes him to the hospital

•”i haven’t felt emotions in years, what are these children doing to me!!”

•midnight just awkwardly pats him on the back and gets him a beer

•then she goes back to playing candy crush so hizashi can handle it

•she’s on level 2,487

•todoroki is only one level behind

•he plays one level of candy crush for every time his dad is an asshole

•he downloaded it two weeks ago

[in-tua-deep]

tua rewatch with the roommate

Episode five

Oh fuck the “I found you. all your bodies.” scene

“We died?” “Horribly.” throwback to the ben convo o o f

“If perfectly arranged under rubble and otherwise unharmed counts as ‘horribly”’  - roommate

I like that Diego says he’s going to kill Hazel and Cha-Cha like it’s a challenge?? lol five doesn’t care if they live or die he only cares if u do you big dumbass

“Well I know none of the main characters die bc there’s a season 2... and i’m pretty sure they’re all in s2... like all of the family?”

I mean luther is kind of valid for being frustrated that five didn’t share about the apocalypse but also like,,, the first person five told about it (Vanya) suggested he might be insane. so. i can understand some reluctance on his part on top of the whole “the last time my siblings fought this the Whole World Died Including Them i would like them as far away from apocalypse stuff as possible”

okay okay so five says “they turned me into the perfect instrument” so do y’all think that implies experimentation like in the comics or ????

all i can think about during the kennedy scene though is my high school history teacher. he went over the assassination in intimate detail and i’m pretty sure he was writing a book about it and everything. mr. hansen if you’re out there - 

i like feral beard five more than mustache five tbh if i’m picking 

“Someone ELSE shot the president? Was he supposed to shoot kennedy or was he supposed to kill the person who shot kennedy?” - Roommate

love that five tells luther to grow up over murder,,, though to be valid pretty sure they did actually murder people as kids SO. grow down?

fuck i love mary,, will you love me like you loved me in the january rain??? just shoot me in the heart

GOD rob is such a good actor

“wait a second... how is he wearing pants?” oh roommate you have a big storm coming

i have some serious questions about the commission and their methods of communication. where do?? the tubes come from? where do they go after?

Allison: i have a bad feeling [about leonard]

where are these instincts for everything else tho??? her marriage?

“Vanya. she really is trying to look out for you. i really would trust her. you could invite her to come along so she can see he’s perfectly fine??” - Roommate, whose instincts regarding not trusting leonard-harold are spot on

apparently my roommate knows people who put salt in their coffee. i have. so many questions.

“That’s suspicious?? that’s suspicious right?? did he do that? is he a secret serial killer? is he a FUCKING secret serial killer?” roommate when they talk about helen cho going missing

“What do you mean stop showing up it’s been like. a day” - I mean. the roommate has a point. 

Klaus’s depression bath is a mood :(

did klaus put eye shadow on before his bath or did he get his hands on eye shadow in vietnam?? the questions that will never be answered

Five is so enthusiastic about having someone who understands... he doesn’t even notice absolutely Not Being In The Mood,, klaus is grieving and five is just like !!! where did you go!!!! like it was a vacation

klaus: yeah i’m ten months older now. when i’m done being depressed i will lord that over diego for the rest of our natural lives.

does five write in all caps all the time?? why? 

roommate: I wonder what the upper size limit on the knives her can use. like is it machete length? forearm length? what are the limits on his powers. if he sharpened a very sharp mechanical pencil could he use it? if he sharpened a piece of the chandelier? at what point does something become a knife?

me: could he hurl mia (my cat)? mia and her knife feet?

allison also writes in all caps to write leonard’s address

we stan agnes and hazel in this household

“I never said we didn’t !! i just thought she was just a random extra in the first episode and every time we cut away i think that’s the last we’ve seen of her” - roommate because i keep saying that this is an agnes stan household

“OH THERE’S THE PATCHWORK COAT i was afraid it didn’t come back” - okay though good question he definitely didn’t have the coat on the bus. what is it with klaus and his magically appearing coat????

oh :(  oh klaus :(  every time klaus is sad i am also sad :(

honestly a family conversation IS the threat in this family

god though this random vet in this bar is actually an asshole though like. klaus doesn’t owe him shit. klaus served. he’s clearly having a moment with the photo. that could have been a family member or something who died i don’t even know

agnes: i’m a twitcher :)

“like a twitch streamer?” -Roommate

PLEASE give me twitch streamer!Agnes au

look i just enjoy hazel and agnes

roommate: honey you’re too young for her

me: NO DON’T BE MEAN TO THEM,,, agnes deserves a boytoy

“does diego drive a manual?” my roommate once again focusing on things that i do not

five: i have to find the people whose deaths could save the timeline

my roommate: is it agnes?? is he going to kill agnes????

i’m still laughing about that fact that luther is holding dolores.... over the fire escape... she couldn’t drop that far lads

luther’s dumb sometimes but he does have some nice heart to hearts with his brother,,,, honestly he and five get along pretty well in the early episodes. kindred spirits. body dysmorphia and isolation squad.

my roommate has to keep remembering social media doesn’t exist in this universe

i am still confused as to why

that won’t stop me from giving everyone iphones and youtube accounts in my aus though

diego can curve ANYTHING he throws, usually knives, according to cha-cha’s research. but that doesn’t explain the spoilers i have seen about s2 sO

Klaus: You also told me that licking a nine volt battery would give me pubes

HOW DID I FORGET THAT LINE

oh diego got a bullet graze forgot about that as well?? does he ever get like. medical attention for that? diego?????

it really has been like. maybe two days since helen cho died. is no one??? concerned????? they just immediately jump into replacing her??????????????????? hellO? 

“very clear camera angles to show that this actress did not actually play the violin for this role” - i mean that’s fair but ellen is trying rip

me: who’s your favorite character so far?  roommate: that’s a tricky question. klaus is very entertaining to watch. allison is the most reasonable and i’m very interested to know, well, she seems like the best combination of reasonable and has the least selfish intentions. diego and luther i feel like are both good in a bland way in that they’re both doing good in the best way they can which usually involves punching people. five is fun. five is very fun. five is as fun to watch as klaus, they’re both very fun actors to watch on screen. they’re more expressive than diego and luther tend to be.  me: so which is your favorite?????  roommate: first instinct says allison, though she probably has the least dynamic or interesting arc so far

are hazel and cha-cha the best because their victims never see them coming?? like. they aren’t really THAT competent.

“I do LOVE the aesthetic of an ice cream truck playing ride of the valkyries” - my roommate is valid

“LOVE the hypersaturated background in this scene. it’s more fun that having it be desaturated.”

five looks so baby in this scene with the handler :(

still unsure where five got that handgun but i’m vibing

hate when she touches his face !! awful!!!

the handler’s little “all of them??” like yeAH ALL OF THEM even though they irritate the living FUCK out of each other. siblings man

ben gets shotgun for the getaway !!! go ben!

“I’m starting to think... given how space and reality seemed to be warping during her playing... that her medication... isn’t for anxiety...” - oh, oh roommate

ah i blocked out the leonard vanya make out as well

“DIDN’T YOU MEET HIM TWO DAYS AGO?” - yeah i feel u roommate

yup there’s helen’s body

“CSI call crime scene investigation - that’s going to start to smell real soon”

pogo: and you understand that the children can never know

me: actually pogo fuck you

and that’s episode 5 everyone thank you and goodnight

episode six

i do love a good flashback to klaus

klaus: sees a shirtless soldier and instantly falls in love

they don’T EVEN QUESTION HIM just “KATZ GET THIS MAN A PAIR OF PANTS” and they go with it?? he just APPEARED and they don’t even care

klaus was really just vibing in the 60s huh

wait this is like 1962 or 63 right

when does s2 take place?? also the 60s right???

didn’t kennedy die in 1963 i feel like what i know about s2 contradicts that date but i could have sworn they said a round trip to 1963??????

luther is SUCH A MOOD in the family briefing.

“aww he’s a bad liar” - roommate

“I realize that [the umbrella] was necessary for the title drop but where the fuck did that come from”

@ the handler please stop touching five,,, but also five has such. non reactions to her touching him. which worries me. like she grabs his shoulder walking alongside him and he doesn’t even look at her

why are there gas masks in the briefcase room...

can you IMAGINE if your boss toted a child into the room and introduced him as the Legendary Time Travelling Assassin that the whole office had a betting pool over who would die that one time and is Definitely approaching 60 not 13... and then called him LEADERSHIP MATERIAL. implying that this child will probably get a promotion before you do?? can you IMAGINE?

“again... two days ago...” roommate about leonard and vanya

vanya really chose literally just the worst time to come back to the academy huh

okay but vanya going off?? valid, but also,, i mean. it IS their dads fault that they don’t have any relationship with vanya?

luther: it’s about the moon  roommate: critical role moon theory

hey like. how did the family get together in the first timeline holy fuck. it’s hard enough to get them together when they Literally Know The World Is Going To End

so remember diego getting grazed with a bullet yeah well he has a sling on now which makes sense!! and yet. when five got grazed by a bullet he SLAPS A BANDAID ON IT. someone please address this.

five is such an asshole coworker i love it

i wonder if dot is a mother. or just a nice coworker. she keeps trying to talk to him and invite him to lunch aww

i wonder if it’s purposeful on the handler’s part to call him “mr. five” instead of “mr. hargreeves” to like... further isolate him from his family? by removing his last name they’re sort of removing his ties to his siblings considering it’s not like they’re related by blood

forgot how much i hate the bathroom scene !! wow !! hate it so much!!! there’s so many violations of social etiquette in such a short scene! it’s so deeply uncomfortable!

luther: stop it pogo! you know everything our dad did

i am remembering once again how much i hate pogo all over again!! reginald literally locked klaus in a mausoleum!! he abused the kids! pogo didn’t even speak up about sending luther to the MOON,,, oh luther :(

he just learned his dad exiled him for no reason he has lots of rights his entire world view was just shattered wow i am like infinitely more sympathetic to luther on the second watch

“I knew allison and luther was a thing. you told me allison and luther was a weird thing. still not a fan.” - my very valid roommate

they could have made the fort so much more sibling-y instead of romantic and it would have been so much better honestly

oh dave :(

“I wonder who her primary care physician is and if she can find out what that medication was...” roommate i wish i knew

“I’m trying to decide if he knew ahead to time to try and get at her specifically or like... i don’t know when he took the figurine I was like ‘doesn’t he own an antique shop is he there to steal antiques from the family home’.” roommate on leonard

forgot the handler gifted five a suit. also don’t like that. don’t like her talk about his body and everything either.

“is it too much to ask to give him two outfits? one he can wear now and one with the new body?” - roommate

honestly with hazel’s talk on budget cuts i’m not surprised he only gets one suit

STOP TOUCHING HIS FACE,,,, HANDLER. STOP TOUCHING HIS FACE

five and his sweet tooth. don’t take the candy five. come on. what did your father TEACH YOU. honestly reggie probably was like “let them get kidnapped it will probably teach them a life lesson”

“there were like... villages that needed rebuilding after disasters. he could have been sending these packages to legit lunar research facilities. legit facilities would have adored to have that information.” 

okay but people KNEW he was on the moon. cha-cha mentioned it. it was in vanya’s book. why were scientists not knocking down reginald’s door demanding the research??? if i was a moon scientist i would have the mansion staked out trying to demand info jesus

“love his eye fluttering in the way of ‘oh shit i got something in my eye i can’t break character scene is still going scene is stILL GOING’“ - hilarious observations from the allison luther fort scene 2.0: grown up version that gets erased

did they just leave the fort up all those years. did no one USE the green house??? did grace lovingly work around it all that time?

oh :(  dave :(

grace is capable of lying and pogo is a shadowy motherfucker

“okay now that they’re actually putting it into the plot i understand why you don’t think he’s trustworthy but you really got on my back about that”

in my defense i just hate him tbh i did not like him when he first showed up and i never particularly liked him tbh

allison: i think you’re the only person who knows who i am and likes me anyway

me, remembering the theory that allison rumored luther to love her: HMMMMMM

okay but i think the luther and allison dance scene is fucking HILARIOUS. absolutely ridiculous. i mean i hate that it’s incest but also the fucking LIGHTS DESCENDING. the RANDOM WARDROBE CHANGE. 

roommate likes the green underskirt thing under allison’s random dance dress

are they just doing this in public???

ugh. the kiss. ugh. erased that from my memory as well

“they clearly want romance in this show but they painted themselves into a corner with the siblings thing” - roommate

five and his fucking STAPLERS isn’t this the second time he’s knocked someone out with a stapler?? the bank robber and now gloria??

five please your siblings were finally doing some decent work on their own issues :/

five is the kind of dramatic as fuck entrances 

“love how he just grabs [allison’s] coffee. kid needs a coffee after all that.” - roommate

five actually does a good job of rallying the siblings though?? they just broke the fuck up in the og timeline

“something tells me that harold jenkins might be leonard”

oh roommate

episode seven

uh oh harold was born

i feel vaguely bad for him

“me the night before a convention” - roommate on harold’s tape and cosplay and everything

okay but how did reginald even KNOW harold jenkins had no powers?? did he? keep tabs on all the forty some kids not just the seven he kept?

but also why the fuck are these people laughing at An Actual Child fuck all of them honestly

“did HE kill hargreeves?? I mean. he’s got motive.” - roommate

harold really said “i think my superpower is actually this hammer motherfucker”

how did he get twelve years?? was he tried as an adult?? was he in juvie? how old WAS he

twelve years ago... they’re 29 soooo seventeen? he did NOT look seventeen? he was NOT seventeen in that flashback what???

roommate theorizes that harold ran off after the murder and committed petty crimes until caught and tried for murder when he was seventeen so was maybe 13 in the flashback

okay so i looked up the timeline and he got out in 2014 or something so he was like 13 in the flashback which makes SO much more sense honestly but also what the FUCK was he doing for five years

“he’s actually laying out all the facts as he knows them and I appreciate that.” -roommate about five briefing the team

five?? the only member of the family with communication skills? it’s? somehow more likely than you think?

“allison’s pants that she’s wearing now are the most perfectly tailored things i’ve ever seen. not even a wrinkle when she’s standing still. do you know how hard that is to do?” again my roommate noticing the things i absolutely do not

five. five. you have a GUT WOUND and also jumped a BUNCH OF TIMES. you are not blinking into the police station and getting the file. you need some SLEEP. and REST. and WOUND CARE FIVE FOR FUCK’S SAKE. you still have a GUNSHOT GRAZE on your upper arm and a SLICE on your wrist from DIGGING OUT A TRACKER. FIVE.

diego wants to be batman SO BAD.

five crossing his arms and Not Uncrossing Them because he’s literally HOLDING HIMSELF TOGETHER.

wow luther is really handling this so much worse in this timeline rip

luther is losing validity points for CHOKING KLAUS i knew this happened but i didn’t remember how awful it was !!! bad and terrible! and luther is very drunk and very sad and very angry. oh. he’s saying he never left the house and never had friends for nothing :(

klaus had the realization that reggie was an asshole YEARS ago and he’s just kind of like “aww. luther :(” 

klaus is trying so hard

“Klaus has had the most heart to hearts with the most siblings honestly.” - roommate

allison at the beginning making her laugh in the office with the EYES, five on the steps of meritech, diego after the vet bar, luther on the couch...

wow cha cha really thought hazel was talking about how meaningful his partnership was with her when he was talking about agNES

five limping up the lawn and staggering up the stairs and clinging to the rails baBY SIT DOWN. YOU ARE BLEEDING.

“inspiring leadership” “one of the greats” what a sibling moment honestly.

five really said “i think i will pass the fuck out now”

five really said “hey i am literally willing to die for this mission because this mission is the safety and lives of my entire family and i love you guys :(”

except he doesn’t because five is decent at information sharing but getting feelings out of him feels like pulling teeth at times smh

is leonard trying to vicariously live his “normal child born on the umbrella academy day discovers they have had powers the WHOLE TIME” dream through vanya??

we yell about how leonard and vanya have known each other for like a week but i mean same for hazel and agnes!! he’s literally asking her to run away with him and she says yes !!!!! agnes is here for the romantic adventure with this man she’s really living her first hot girl summer and living for it

“she’s having her own little rom com! she thinks she’s living in a rom com not a dark sci fi!” - roommate accurate as usual

she just called ben the emotional support ghost and i mean... she ain’t wrong

honestly klaus should have just left luther to his rave, he didn’t get to party in his teens or during his college years or anything

i do appreciate the viking yell of “B R O T H E R” that luther greets klaus with though because that’s exactly how i greet my own siblings whenever i see them

oh klaus :(

oh klaus :(

he’s having war flashbacks, cravings, is in withdrawal, AND experiencing sensory overload while reliving one of the more traumatizing moment of his life

oh klaus :(

five in a bed for the second time of the season which is nice for him. if only the first time wasn’t because he passed out drunk and the second time wasn’t because of a whole shrapnel wound. i am now that captain of the Let Five Sleep brigade holy SHIT like at least they imply that the others sleep five is just feral and ready to go at all times

are the police allowed to just. remove someone’s arm sling? is that permitted? his arm could be fucked up? i mean. it is? he was shot?

“I saw everything my brothers and sister could do ruin their lives” VANYA some REALIZATION up in here,,,, admitting that the umbrella academy wasn’t exactly a desirable place to be is actually some real growth for her and leonard just fucking shuts her down? fuck that man

VANYA SEE THE RED FLAGS FOR WHAT THEY ARE COME ON

oh klaus :(  oh luther :(  oh :(

“love his corset side pants, like benedict from violet evergarden” - on the topic of Klaus’s pants

“I made everyone else so I must have made you” says god except for the fact that the kids just... surprise popped up instead of coming about the natural way. maybe god DIDN’T made them????????

oh klaus :(  prepare for disappointment :(

oh i didn’t notice the photos of the umbrella academy in the barbershop the first time i watched this

so klaus gives an age for the mausoleum... thirteen... do you think that was before or after five left? statistically it’s probably after bc it was only a couple of months after they turned thirteen that five vanished

Klaus’s “we were just kids” breaks my heart every time

if i was one of reggie’s kids i would have just not gone to the funeral. rip to the hargreeves kids but i’m different

he doesn’t even call klaus klaus in death, he still calls klaus number four. fuck that man.

“i was gonna say i’d have been very very surprised if they kept him dead” - roommate on klaus waking up

“Five bucks says he set these guys up to try and get something out of her” - the roommate being very perceptive

cha cha is VERY rude to my girl agnes

honestly why DIDN’T hazel just kill cha cha after her whole speech and threats about killing agnes slowly in front of him???? like he literally watched her try to kill him as well

why wasn’t diego arrested in the original day that wasn’t actually?? he was being considered already. he still left the house, albeit with grace instead of allison. why wasn’t he arrested then???????? 

roommate thinks it’s interesting how committed the show is to their old timey shit. she used a nicer words like anachronisms but the point is: w h y

are these episodes even longer than i remember?? holy SHIT

[fullkingdomphilosopher]

Moriarty is not dead (yet)

Hello and a warm welcome to the three people who have somehow lost their way here. You are in for a ride. (Hope you read to the end.)   :)

Because today I feel the need to waste my time by sharing my thoughts about a fictional character into the void of the internet to get it out off my mind. It might get a little long and unstructured at points so please bare with me. But you have been warned. So without further ado let us discuss why (BBC Sherlock’s) Moriarty is in fact. not. dead. (I have read many illogical theories about this topic so I am not claiming in any way to have come up with everything myself. The following will be a mixture of canon facts,  my own thoughts and other people ideas. Irrelevant/not so convincing information will be stated in brackets or I will probably leave most of it out. Get comfortable and enjoy.)

Let us begin at the beginning by first taking a look at the information we get about Moriarty throughout the series. Please keep this general information in mind for later. (Here I will only comment if at all very superficially. Most are only general impressions I not necessarily agree with.)

(1) One can simply summarise season ones information about Moriarty the following way:  

1. Moriarty is a criminal mastermind (consulting criminal)

2. He is bored, insane, intelligent, rich and powerfull

3. Sherlock-fanboy

4. Has not too much will to live

(2) So now let us take a more or less objective look at season two or more precisely some parts of »The Reichenbach fall«.                                                  

•Near the end Moriarty sits at the edge of the roof playing “stayin‘ alive” which he then upon Sherlocks‘ arrival comments by saying: “ (...)The Final Problem. “Staying Alive”. So boring, isn’t it? It’s just… staying.(...)”.                              

This tells us the following (does it?) : 

1. Moriarty is bored of living and wants to die 

2. Moriarty has planned for Sherlock to die now

3. Both

•Later while convincing Sherlock to jump he makes the mistake to say: “ (Your death is the only thing that’s going to call off the killers.) I’m certainly not going to do it.” which leads to the conclusion that Moriarty needs to die to make Sherlock jump. And by no means do I deny that Moriarty is mad enough to go as far as to kill himself only to win against Sherlock. (If he could have been completly sure to win he definitely would do so without hesitation.) He IS insane after all.

•Before shooting his brain out while talking to Sherlock he seems very...emotional. Since he is (very quickly) convinced now that Sherlock is not an ordinary person moreover he even is HIM (Moriarty) he can/has to die now peacefully (because he doesn‘t feel alone anymore) forcing Sherlock to jump.

Okay so now let us be a little more sceptical. You are telling me that we fully accept Sherlock beeing able to fake his death with Mycrofts help and even with a list of different plans but for the guy whose LITERAL job it is to fake deaths and who has an equally high IQ (or even higher) than Sherlock, it seems unlikely? (Keep in mind Moriarty is actually the superior one in this scene. We will discuss this later.) Moriarty didn‘t even care where the two of them would meet. It‘s like you can almost hear him say: “Wherever faking your death is easier for you darling. I will win anyway.” He actually wanted Sherlock to survive because he has bigger plans for him. Just think about it: if you were a psychopath and bored your whole live and then finally miraculously you find an interesting fragile toy, would you break it quickly or rather carefully play with it for as long as it still gives you joy? Also faking ones death by a shot in the head seems possible at almost any location. Just saying. (This one is a little far stretched but if Moriarty IS Sherlock wouldn't he do exactly the same thing? Faking his death, disappearing for a while and then amazingly coming back from the dead? But let's not digress.)   He wants Sherlock to survive so badly he actually helps him by giving him hints (thats what the bored kind of criminal does). Did you notice how Moriarty after saying “I’m certainly not going to do it.” (You really think he would make such a dumb mistake while not even being pressured by anything?) turns his head back and expectedly looks at Sherlock?And he doesn't do so to watch him jump. If that was the case I believe he would give him his whole attention instead of shortly looking over his shoulder, no he waits for Sherlock to get it, to react. But let‘s continue with what happens before Moriarty “spontaneously” decides to kill himself. After their dramatic chat Moriarty shakes Sherlocks hand (which confuses Sherlock) and only lets go when he shoots himself. This might be a sign for his men/snipers for scenario “fake death” so they can shoot somewhere near him or anything like that. He could have faked his death by blood pakets in his coat, drugs, sleeping spray you name it. I don't really care how he did it (it‘s pointless to spectaculate about this) but I am quite sure if someone would find a way to do this it would be him.(Another thing is that while Moriarty drops dead to the ground he doesn't let go of the gun which is rather strange...and the blood only streamed from his head instead of splattering. But let us just write this off as a movie mistake. After all everybody makes mistakes. Also things on TV probably can't be too gory.)

(3) Season three. I think this is the most confusing season regarding the information about Moriarty. First of all we indirectly get to know from Anderson (yes I know very reliable source) that Moriarty‘s body wasn't found since his theory regarding Sherlock‘s death indicates that Moriarty‘s dead body with a sherlock mask on his face was used as Sherlock‘s dead body on the pavement. And while yes this is very ridiculous I think it is strange how Lestrade didn‘t correct him on the fact that it couldn‘t be Moriarty‘s body since it was found on the roof. (But admittedly this doesn't need to mean anything. Maybe Lestrade was just too fed up with him already.) However the confusing part just starts here. If we assume no body was found then how do they know Moriarty is dead? Who gave them this information? If you take a closer look it seems only people somehow related to Sherlock seem to know about Moriarty‘s death. But on TV they NEVER mention anything about it. They only report about how Moriarty supposedly was only an actor named Richard Brook paid by Sherlock to seem smart and about Sherlock falling or jumping to his death. Okay so they probably have got this information from Kitty but wouldn‘t it be very strange if Richard Brook committed suicide on this same roof before Sherlock jumped? Why would he do that? Also while still “playing” Moriarty since he didn't wear Brook‘s clothes? Nothing I can think of makes any sense how you could explain to the public why Richard Brook decided to commit suicide there. But then again even the papers only write about the death of the “fraudulent detective“ not mentioning anything about Moriarty or Richard Brooks death.  Why not? Wouldn't this cause even more drama? “Fraudulent Detective kills”    (or forces man to commit suicide). More drama means more readers/viewers so why not mention anything about it? Unless there is nothing to report about it since no body was found. Good you might say maybe Moriarty‘s men just took the body after Sherlock jumped but then how did Lestrade and Anderson knew he was dead? (Or was it just a ridiculous assumption of Anderson that Moriarty was dead? Well that would be a big coincidence.) Or maybe Mycroft‘s men took it and told Scotland Yard but why not make it public then? Or maybe really noone (except for Sherlock and Mycroft) knew about his death at this point? (Wouldn't Mycroft check for Richard Brook then?)  Wouldn't the reporters wanna interview Brook then? About this traumatic event he got pulled in? Drama is good not only for the press but also for an actor. Brook would love to get attention in this case wouldn't he? Wouldn't...you know Kitty notice Richard was gone and report on that if he was really dead? Wouldn't it be strange that Brook suddenly stops acting? Well we don't really get any information so from this (admitted mess) I just conclude that simply no body was found. (If you can explain this situation otherwise you are very welcomed to do so.) And you know this is really funny because a certain someone himself said that it can only mean one thing in a detective show when there is no body (looking at you Mr. Moffat) namely that the victim survived. (I suppose you could also explain everything if it indeed was twins this way: Moriarty is dead and Brook is with Kitty. But I personally am not really convinced by this. Not because Sherlock said it‘s never twins but think about it: How big is the probability for both of them beeing amazing actors? This theory that Moriarty has a twin brother is quite popular. A main argument for this is how Moriarty is left handed while Brook appears to be right handed. Well First of all he can just be ambidextrous and second Jim from IT also mainly used his right hand in the scene he was in. And the creators stated first it was planned for Moriarty to only appear in this scene as Jim from IT so it definitely is Moriarty. Or do you think Moriarty would want his twin brother to meet Sherlock? That would miss the point. Moriarty is fascinated or rather obsessed with Sherlock that‘s why he wanted to meet him. Also if you watch closely you can see how he grins when leaving turning away from Molly. His (probably nonexsistent) twin brother wouldn't have any reason to do so. So we know he is quite good at acting/manipulating. Also if you think about it it is the exact same strategy: He finds a person that is useful to him, wins their trust and gets into a relationship with them to be able to get what he wants with their help. The exact same thing he did with Molly he now did with Kitty. So that underlines that it indeed was him and not a twin brother. Also wouldn‘t a twin brother...you know...ruin the joke of the name “Richard Brook”? Anyway after faking his death he probably just stayed with Kitty and then broke up with her/left her after the situation calmed down again.)

(4) Ah yes now on to my favourite part: Season four. What do we get to know in season four? Right! EVERYTHING WAS PLANNED! So Moriarty knew(/hoped) Sherlock wouldn't die there and he also probably knew he had to fake his death because otherwise Sherlock couldn't fake his. So he had way more than enough time to plan how he is going to do it. Why don't we deal with why Moriarty killed himself now. The obvious answer in season two is that he kills himself so Sherlock has to jump and Moriarty beats him this way. Some may say he hadn't any other choice which I don't agree with. If there was a code to stop the killers then there also was one to make the killers shoot the victims immediately. Moriarty could have just counted from 5 downward and if Sherlock didn't jump in that time he would just give the command to kill John, Mrs. Hudson and Lestrade. I mean what did he had to be afraid of? Beeing killed by Sherlock? Now that wouldn't make any sense would it if he decided to kill himself instead anyway? (Also it totally makes a lot of sense for Moriarty to squeak afraid when Sherlock holds him over the edge. That totally is what a person indifferent of life or without any future plans would do.) So you might be asking yourself why he would go as far as to make Sherlock believe he is dead especially when he knew Sherlock would survive the fall anyway? Why the struggle? Well that‘s simple. (That‘s the final problem: Staying alive.) He is playing a game. In case you didn't notice Sherlock played dumb/clueless in season 2 episode 3 with not only Moriarty but everyone around him since he couldn't be sure when Moriarty listens and wanted to have the upper hand in their little game. But everything Moriarty said on the rooftop was an act as well and if that is really the case he is not simply a good but a BRILLIANT actor.He had the upper hand all the time no matter what Sherlock did but he wanted Sherlock to believe that he is dead so Sherlock would feel he was superior over Moriarty. Great minds think alike. Also while yes of course Moriarty would be crazy enough to kill himself you can not tell me he wouldn't want to see Sherlock play with his sister, to see him struggle and fail. I mean his whole life purpose since he found Sherlock was to beat him so you're telling me he wouldn't wanna be there when what he has worked for finally happens? (I mean come on: he even paid over 30 million pounds in season one just to get Sherlock OUT to play and now he is fine with not seeing the ending? Why not watching Sherlock ‘fall‘? It is no secret he is OBSESSED with Sherlock.). He could still have killed himself afterwards. Also does he really trust Eurus THAT much? Okay so now you might ask why he didn't show himself in season four then. (No rush.) Patience is key my friend. (One last not very convincing thing in season four I just want to throw in: In one of Moriarty‘s recordings in Sherrinford in which he immitates a clock he stops after Sherlock screams. I guess it could be a coincidence but regarding none of the other recordings stopped showing only a quietly at the camera starring Moriarty it must be a gigantic one.)

So now if you think I am done then think again and get ready for the unstructured part of my little essay. (Yes even more unstructured than everything before.) Here follows other short information about Moriarty and clues why he is still alive from the whole show in no special order:

(- I will start with one not very convincing one you might actually have already known since you are on tumblr. The lyrics of the song “Who you really are” which plays at the end of episode three of season four repeatedly states:         “Moriarty is alive”. While I believe it probably somehow is possible to change the lyrics for anyone I don't really get why anyone would wanna do this unless it is official or someone is just trolling. Or both.)

-Moriarty is soo changeable

-Moriarty is a good hacker

(-What is this strange “Surprise, you didn't think I'd just dissappear did you?”-clip that was played after season three I believe? If it is supposed to be just one of the clips Moriarty filmed for Eurus why is the background different? I think there are actually clips of him with three different backgrounds? Why? Too much to shoot in one day? If you have any thoughts on this please let me now.)

-Contrary to some others I don't believe Moriarty is just Eurus puppet. I don't see any need for that. Eurus is just Moriartys client like many others on the show. They both have the same goal. Eurus actually was so interested in him because she noticed his interest in Sherlock so it is not that everything from the beginning was Eurus‘ brilliant puppet show. If any then it was him who used her but I don't want to dive into this topic now.

-Moriarty‘s problem is that he is supposedly the best and everyone else around him is boring and can't get to him. He is lonely and depressed. But why would he still want to kill himself after meeting Eurus?                                                     Isn't she interesting enough? Or did he still think Sherlock would beat her too? But wouldn't there then again be a point in living to beat Sherlock or kill him like he promised in season one?

-In the special “The abominable bride” I think Sherlock isn't looking after the answer to the question how Moriarty killed himself rather than why he did it.   And the Moriarty in his head turns around showing him the hole in his head asking something like if it was very obvious and saying maybe he just needs a Good back comb. Back comb. Comeback. Sherlock concludes in this moment that Moriarty faked killing himself to have a good comeback. So he actually does know now that Moriarty isn't dead.

-Moriarty IS the main villain/antagonist of the show. Even after his supposed death in season 2 he still reappears or gets mentioned in most of the other episodes and even at the end with Eurus. Why would a writer do that if it was pointless? I don't think they would want degrade him if Andrew Scott‘s amazing performance even made them rewrite the script to have more Moriarty. Mister Gatiss and Mister Moffat are the real Moriarty fanboys here. They just build up tension very slowly while also getting the attention mostly off him for now. Moriarty is Sherlock‘s equal. His shadow. So he SHOULD be endgame. It is simply impossible to create a bigger villain now since he reappeared in all the seasons until now. Unless the writers plan to write at least 5 more seasons of course.

-In season four Eurus tells Sherlock Moriarty wasn't interested in living but in the impact he would have by dying. But does he really trusts her so much?              Is he really okay with gifting her his favourite toy? Or is he maybe just using her as he does with everybody else? Maybe she isn't lying but simply  doesn't know he is still alive.

-You might say: “But Sherlock clearly says that Moriarty is dead. Especially after the special.” Well yes he does. But (1.) he was on drugs. (2.) he really needs to believe (or rather not really Sherlock but the audience) that Moriarty is dead. Otherwise his (anticipated) comeback would be too predictable and boring. (3.) Sherlock isn't always right but I admit he is most of the time so most importantly (4.) he still keeps playing. The game isn't over yet and he needs to play safe. He keeps on playing dumb/clueless like he did in “The Reichenbachfall” where he even lied to John about Moriarty not touching or writing anything so Moriarty feels superior. We never get the IOU conclusion he worked on all the time. He kept everybody including us clueless just as he does now in season 4 to have the upper hand again or at least not to be in disadvantage.

-Then you also might say something like: “But this isn't like in the Canon.” Ah yes. The Canon. (1.) Remind me again where does it say this in the Canon? Before the secret, psycho genius sister held captive in a maximum security prison on a secluded island or after?...You get the point? (2.) Originally even Sherlock should be dead in the Canon (Which I actually think might happen in season five). (3.) It isn't even against the Canon since in the Canon Moriarty dies in “The final problem” and not in “The Reichenbach Falls”. Him dying in season two would actually be more against the Canon.

(-Since Mycroft was with Eurus alone before and isn't really on her side maybe he actually is controlled by her too without knowing so? Maybe he unknowingly even helped Moriarty? But this seems rather unrealistic. Just a thought.)

-Now something I don't really get: Eurus said apparently she was Moriarty‘s revenge on Sherlock. His revenge for what? Killing himself for no real reason? That seems not very smart. Beeing his distraction in the big boring world? Or maybe they have a history we don't know of? It seems quite possible. If Sherlock was able to delete Eurus from his mind why couldn't he have done the same thing with Moriarty?

-Why does Eurus mention Moriarty has a brother who was a station master? Why was he jealous of him? Why WAS he a station master? Is he dead now or does he just got a different job if he isn't one anymore? Why is there all this train imagery in Moriarty‘s clips? Why is that important at all? Is this foreshadowing, simple taunting or am I missing something completely? (The last thing at the end of season four we see is Sherlock and John running out of a train station but I don't know if that has really anything to do with that.)

-Fight me on this one but the ending is too perfect. I didn't buy it for one second. I mean character development and friends bla bla but you want to tell me Sherlock suddenly wouldn't be bored without Moriarty? Sure the normal cases will keep him occupied for some time but eventually sooner or later they will just bore him again, don't you agree? You can't “cure” a sociopath. And without the right stimulation he might become the “bad” guy himself or simply die of boredom.

-Moriarty WANTS Sherlock dead. Just in a slow fun way. On John‘s blog Moriarty even wonders how Sherlock‘s skull would look like on his wall. He is obsessed obviously.

-Don't get me wrong I am not sad or mad about the fact Moriarty is supposedly dead. But rather on HOW he died. His death should be something big something grandiose. I am talking a whole city exploding why fireworks spell out his name -grandious. (Well maybe not that extra but you get the point.) I refuse to believe he would be fine dying in such a simple way without the world even knowing his name. Come on. It‘s “I-dance-while-stealing-the-crown-jewels-Moriarty” not “Jim-from-IT”. If he is still alive I am sure he will die in the last season but in a more exciting way.

(-While trying to get out the information if he really has a sister out of Mycroft Sherlock let's one if them say: “Nothing is impossible.”)

-Let‘s talk about my favourite clue at the end now because I am tired. Do you remember a certain little conversation Sherlock and Moriarty had when evil queen Moriarty came to visit and dishonored Sherlock‘s apple? Let me remind you:

JIM: You know when he was on his death bed, Bach, he heard his son at the piano playing one of his pieces. The boy stopped before he got to the end ... SHERLOCK: ... and the dying man jumped out of his bed, ran straight to the piano and finished it. JIM: Couldn’t cope with an unfinished melody. SHERLOCK: Neither can you. That’s why you’ve come.

Does any bell ring with you?  Sherlock is playing Moriarty‘s game: The death of Sherlock. But he doesn't play it to the end. So Moriarty will return to finish it. After all as Sherlock says Moriarty can't cope with an unfinished melody so he wouldn't die before finishing it.

All that beeing said I still also wouldn't be surprised (just disappointed because I feel Moriarty is the only one who is a match for Sherlock and could do so much more entertaining things.) if he really was dead. Because after all this is only fiction. In fiction there are often many logical explanation for events but only the ones the writers decided on will be the truth. (Unless you guys are up to rioting. Anyone has their adresses? Just kidding of course for legal reasons. I think they do a really good job with the show and while I must say I hate liars I respect artists. Imagine they would just tell us everything that would happen from the beginning. That would be boring. Looking forward to season five. I am sure we will get it before 2050. :))

So thanks to coming to my TED-talk. If you have any other helpful information I have missed, questions, opinions on this, criticism or anything else feel free to write me. And please tell me if you have really read to the end. I am curious if anyone has. :)

(Sorry for grammar mistakes and such. It has been a while since I wrote this much in English.)