#but u know all shows gotta end at some point

[ihonestlydontknowwhattocallthis]

In my head I’m hoping it ends with them just living out their normal lives (well lives and deaths) in the house and it just ends how any season would end but I know it’s not gonna end like that and their prolly gonna all move on or Alison and Mike will move out of the house. Or worse, both.

[fightingdragonswithwho]

hate to be a hater on the main … but this season of ted lasso excels (once again) at team dynamic and the found family elements and i think the finale absolutely nailed that, i cried, i laughed, it was perfect on that. now as for the individual stories and relationships… yeah, let’s leave it at that

[tetsumie]

“𝐘𝐎𝐔’𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐎 𝐂𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐘” — 𝐏𝐓 𝟐

read part 1 here!

pairing: kuroo x reader & kenma x reader

genre: hurt/comfort

a/n: hello !! sorry for being gone for soooo long D: i wasn’t doing well and was in a really bad place mentally.. (plus burnout 😓😓) but regardless tysm for all the love in the first part of this fic! i appreciate u all sm and i’ll work on getting asks in! thank u for being so patient w me !! luv u :D

kuroo tetsuro

you woke up late today and weren't surprised that kuroo had already left for work by the time you woke up. but he did leave you a post-it note saying he made breakfast leftovers for you in the fridge.

you smile at the thought that kuroo took the time out of his day to make some food especially in the morning. however, as you're getting ready for the day, your eye catches the lunch bag that's sitting on the kitchen bar countertop.

"this idiot," you mumble, shaking your head with a smile on your face. you pull out your phone and shoot him a text.

y/n: thanks for the breakfast it was really good

tetsu: im glad :)

y/n: also you left your lunch at home stupid

tetsu: oh shit

tetsu: can you drop it off for me? i cant come home to pick up, im in a meeting rn

y/n: yeah that's fine

tetsu: thanks baby ill kiss u when i see u

tetsu: love u 2 the moon and back !!

y/n: ur so weird

y/n: love u 2 the moon and back <3

a few hours pass by and now you're taking the bus to head to kuroo's office with his lunch bag in hand. before leaving the house, you decided to swap his current lunch which was some leftovers with his favorite food, grilled salted mackerel.

you enter his office floor and are greeted by the office receptionist from the floor. "i'm just here to drop off some food for kuroo-san."

"oh yes, right this way," she stands up and opens the office door for you and points out where his room is.

as you're about to knock on his door, you hear his voice from the other side. "i'm not sure if i can come out tonight to eat kenma. y/n probably wants me home, you know how clingy they get sometimes."

your heart sinks to the floor.

has he always thought of me this way? clingy? i didn't mean to act that way? i just like being in his company. i didn't mean to be clingy. i didn't know he felt that way...

"anyways, i'll call you back kenma. i gotta get back to work. see ya later" he ends the call.

you take a deep breath, standing in front of the door, thinking about kuroo's words to his best friend. before you could even knock, the door opens and you're greeted by kuroo.

"oh y/n! you should've texted me you were here!"

you let out a laugh that sort of dies in your throat. "oh um i just wanted to surprise you that's all."

"come in, let's eat together. you can see the beautiful downtown view from here," he tries to usher you inside his personal office room.

you're a little uncomfortable so you hold yourself back from going on, "maybe another time, yeah? i gotta head back. i've got a lot of work to do with college and work and stuff."

"no yeah of course, i get it. work hard! but first..." kuroo smiles and before you can pull away, he kisses you on the head. "i'll see you when i get home. love you!"

too ashamed to even look at him as you walked out of his office, you just wave to him with your back facing him as you walked away.

you're now sitting on the bus on the way home, thinking about the way he called you clingy. "you know how clingy they get.." has he always thought i'm clingy? has he just been putting up with my annoying habits? i thought he liked the way i treated him. i didn't know he thought it was clingy.

you're trying to look back at your actions and now it's all coming back to you.

you're always trying to kiss him, hug him, cuddle him. you're always talking to him about random things from an occurrence at the grocery store to some new show you're watching. literally last night, you both were cuddling while watching a new episode of kuroo's favorite sit-com and you were running your fingers through his hair.

it all made sense.

you were clingy.

and he wanted space.

you were going to respect that.

kuroo comes home later that evening and announces himself with an "i'm home!"

you're on the dining table with the computer open, working on some new assignment and you smile at him. "welcome home," you say with a smile.

he's expecting you to get up and come over and hug him like you usually do but to his surprise, you continue to look back at your computer.

he assumes you're just busy and doesn't think much of it.

kuroo heads into the shared bedroom to unwind from his hectic day at work. he takes a shower and changes into some pajama pants and is now heading back to the living room to see what you're up to.

you're still sitting on the dining table with all your notebooks splayed out and computer open, working on what seems to be some really big project. he plops down next to you and starts squinting at the screen. he starts poking you to grab your attention from the screen.

"the mackerel was really good today."

"that's good."

silence envelops the atmosphere between the both of you until kuroo decides to speak again.

"what are you working on?"

"college stuff."

"maybe take a break now?" he suggests.

"i can't. it's due soon," your voice flat. "if you want dinner, there's some leftovers i made in the fridge."

"alright," he replies, getting up from the chair to the kitchen to warm up some food.

his shoulders droop a little. he was hoping to spend some time with you. but he is aware that something is off with you. he's not sure what it is but he knows something isn't right. you haven't given him a single kiss or even a hug since he's been back and your usual sarcastic remarks are gone.

you've barely even acknowledged his presence.

"maybe it's just an off day?" is what he convinces himself.

but those "off days" are starting to become more consistent.

you're out of bed before he wakes up in the morning and you barely talk to him when he comes home. you always end up sleeping after he falls asleep and he can't even stay up because of how exhausted he gets after work. the amount of physical affection has declined from you and every time he texts or talks to you, your replies are barely existent.

it feels like he's living by himself. when did it get so cold?

on the other hand, you think it's going well! you haven't been all up in his business lately. you're giving him the space he wants. you're hoping that kuroo is feeling much happier since you're smothering him less. sure, you miss getting to hold and cuddle him but this is what he wanted, right?

now that the week is over, kuroo is hoping to spend the weekend with you.

that morning, kuroo sets an alarm to wake up earlier than you in hopes of spending some extra affectionate time with you. however, the moment he wakes up, the other side of the bed is empty and cold.

he has no choice but to get out of bed to see where you are. there's no way you're up right now. at 7 am on a weekend? no way.

he walks out of the room and he feels his heart chip. you're sleeping on the couch, slightly shivering because the blanket you're using barely covers you. have you been sleeping on the couch this past week? why didn't i notice? kuroo begins to internally berate himself right now for letting you sleeping on the couch for this past week right under his nose.

with no hesitation, he bridal-style carries you back into the shared bedroom and tucks you under the duvet cover and comes back into bed.

however, you've already woken up and you sit up on the bed, startled. "w-what? where am i?"

he scoffs, "i brought you in our bedroom idiot."

"oh," you're now grabbing your stuff and climbing out to go back to the couch but kuroo stops you by grabbing your arm.

"where are you going?"

"to the couch?"

"but this is our bedroom?"

"no, this is your bedroom," you emphasize.

"y/n." his tone feels cold to you. "talk to me."

"we are talking, are we not?"

he starts scratching the back of his neck. "yes but you know it's not the same. what's going on baby?"

his hand to tries to reach your cheek to stroke it with his thumb but you turn away and immediately stand up from his bed. "it's okay kuroo, please go back to sleep. it's the weekend, you should rest."

his heart chips at the gesture. why are you avoiding him like this? what did he do? what happened to 'tetsu?'

"it's tetsu to you," he mumbles.

you open your mouth but shut it and cast you eyes away from his stare down at the floor.

"it's always been tetsu to you," he states.

you're still silent and he takes it as his queue to continue speaking.

"baby, everyday i come home from work and you barely acknowledge me. you're always busy doing 'college stuff' or something else. you barely hug me or even kiss me anymore. what happened? what did i do? did i do something wrong? did i overstep my boundaries? are you mad at me about something? please i wanna know what i did wrong so i can fix myself."

your heart softens at his words and you begin to immediately reassure him.

"there's nothing wrong with you... nothing has ever been wrong with you... i just want to work on giving you your space. i know that you think i'm clingy and so i wanted to work on just giving you room to breathe. i know i can be a little too much sometimes. i'm sorry for not realizing how clingy my actions were sooner. i'm sorry i-"

he immediately walks over to you and brings you to his chest, hugging you tightly. your eyes slightly widen. "don't you dare fucking apologize. it's not your fault. shit, it's never been your fault, baby. what made you even think that?"

in embarrassment, you mumble, "i heard you say i'm clingy to kenma. sorry i didn't mean to overhear."

"oh, my love," he pulls away and looks at you with a sad look in his eyes. "it's not what you think."

he sighs and he sits on the side of the bed and taps the bed space in front of him for you to sit down as well. "kenma's been trying to get me to go meet some new volleyball members to affiliate them with the jva and to be honest, i already have so much on my plate with the current affiliates, that i'm really trying to avoid going out for dinner with him. i'm trying to get one of my coworkers to go on my behalf to seal the deal but i can't find anyone willing to."

"i just used your name as an excuse. i swear on my life, i never really meant that. i never ever meant to hurt you."

still finding it hard to believe him, you mumble, "you don't need to lie.. i understand if-"

"y/n, i swear on my mother, i'm not lying," he interrupts. "every single fucking day, the only think i ever look forward to is seeing your beautiful face in my apartment. i look forward to your rambles about the new show you started watching or how the current professor you're shadowing is a douche. i love your bear hugs and i love the way you kiss me all over my face in the mornings. fuck, i love knowing that i get to go to sleep with you every night and i get to wake up to you every morning. i love you, just the way you are. please don't ever change yourself over some fucking lie i said."

"i'm so sorry y/n, so sorry for ever making you doubt my love for you," he intertwines his hand in yours and looks into your eyes. "i'll do anything to regain your trust.

he senses the hesitation in your eyes and honestly, he can't blame you. you've been harboring this guilt for a week and it makes sense that you're still feeling a little uncomfortable around him.

but to his surprise, you inch your way closer to him and hug his chest and the tears begin to fall. his body tenses and he feels so guilty about everything. he rubs reassuring circles on your back and kisses your head every few moments.

after you wipe your tears on his shirt, you look up at him and honestly kuroo hates to admit this but you still look gorgeous even with a tear stained face. he's grinning at you and begins to pepper your face with his kisses.

"love you to the moon and back," he whispers into your ear.

you chuckle and kiss him on the lips. "love you to the moon and back, tetsu."

in that moment, he swears to himself that he'll make sure that you never have to doubt his love for you ever again.

kozume kenma

as the ceo of his own startup company, a youtube streamer, and a college student, kenma can almost never find any time to himself. the only time he really feels at peace is either when he's asleep or when he's with you.

but sometimes things get so hectic and suffocating, he just wants to be alone, away from the world.

after a long day of classes, you walk into your shared apartment and you can hear kenma talking from his bedroom/home office. you try to keep quiet not disturbing him.

in hopes of cheering him up, you decide what better way to do so by making his favorite food: apple pie. you put down your stuff on the living room couch, grab the apron, and get to work.

kenma stays locked up in his bedroom for the majority of time that you're baking and a part of you just hopes that maybe he'll come out to just say "hi" or just accompany you to see what you're up to but unfortunately he doesn't.

after the pie is done baking in the oven and you've brought him a slice so he can get some food in his system because you're sure he hasn't been taking care of himself. you're hoping that maybe, just maybe, the both of you will finally get to spend some time together.

you knock on the door twice.

no response.

you knock once more and call out his name, "kenma, you busy still?"

still no response.

you sigh, realizing there was no hope in knocking, and decide to twist the knob and enter his room. you're greeted with the sight of him sitting on his gaming chair, knees to his chest, headphones over his ears, and slightly biting the eraser top of his pencil.

he must have felt the presence of someone else in the room with him because he looked away from his computer screen and his eyes widened. he slid his headphones off his ear and hung them around his neck.

"how long have you been home?" he bluntly asks.

"for an hour or two now, i think," you reply.

“oh sorry, i didn’t see you,” he mumbles.

you chuckle in response. “i didn’t think you would considering you’ve been cooped up in your room the entire time.”

“well yeah,” he says. “i’m busy.”

as he’s about to put his headphones back on and get back to work, you speak up. “i know you’re busy but do you wanna eat with me? i made-”

“can we talk later? i don’t have time for your clinginess right now.”

oh.

he puts his headphones on and indulges himself back in his work, not even registering the weight of his words.

you slowly walk out of his room, silently close the door, grab yourself a slice of apple pie originally made for the both of you, and plop yourself on the couch to watch some new show on the television.

after working for nearly hours on end, kenma finally finishes the load of work he had piled. now all he wants to do is just spend some time with you before going to bed. he walks out of the bedroom and is greeted by you asleep with the television humming in the background.

he can't help but let a small smile envelop his features. it's such a domestic sight and he wants to photograph this moment in time.

he knows he said some harsh words to you out of frustration but he hopes that you understand that he didn’t truly mean them.

he goes over and kisses your forehead and he smells the distinctive scent of apple pie and his heart softens at the thought that you made him his favorite food.

he goes over to his bedroom, grabs a blanket and lays it over you and goes under the blanket, snuggling himself closer to you. he hasn't felt this relaxed in a while and your presence is just so comforting to him.

he doesn't know what he'd do without you.

the next morning, you wake up and find yourself in an awkward position and your feel arms wrapped around your torso. you look to your left and are greeted by kenma's sleeping figure and you can't help but smile.

but you remind yourself of what he told you yesterday and you silently get up from the couch and begin to get ready for the rest of your day.

his words, "i don't have time for your clinginess right now", really had sent you into a spiral last night and you were too exhausted to think clearly. did you always come off as clingy to him? you were definitely a bit more energetic and enthusiastic than him but you never thought it was clingy?

you can't seem to think straight so you decide to maybe go out for a walk, just to take your mind off things. you just need some time alone, away from your apartment with him.

kenma wakes up only a few minutes later and he feels cold. his neck is sore, considering how he slept in an uncomfortable position because he wanted to sleep with you. however, to his surprise, he doesn't find you asleep next to him.

as he walks around the house, calling your name, a sense of urgency begins to form in the pit of his stomach.

he dials your number and it goes to voicemail.

he does it again. still voicemail.

he's about to call you one more time until he hears the jangle of keys and the door opening. a sigh of relief leaves his mouth and as you're about to turn your keys to open the door, he's a step ahead of you, opening the door for you.

"oh my god, i thought you went missing," kenma hugs you, catching you by surprise. "where'd you go?"

hesitant to reply, you say, "oh just went on a walk, that's all."

"you should've told me, we could've gone together," he states. "i feel like we haven't seen each other in forever."

"it's fine. don't worry about it."

there's something wrong and he can sense it in your demeanor. as you're heading to the master bedroom, he can see the way your shoulders slump as you put your keys back. he doesn't address your distant behavior, thinking that you're just having a rough morning and it'll get better as the day goes on.

unfortunately, it doesn't get better.

you seem to be fine but you just feel incredibly distant.

kenma's been playing games in his room all day and unlike usual, you're not in his bedroom watching him play or sitting on the bed scrolling through your phone. his gaming experience isn't the same when you're not there.

he pauses his game and goes out to the living room to see you lying down on the couch, scrolling through videos on your phone. he wants to ask why you're not staying with him but he doesn't want to make overstep your boundaries, especially since it seems like you're not in a good mood.

but that's anything from what you want.

you want him to ask you to stay in his room and keep you company. but because he hasn't done so, his word "clingy" began to scream louder in your head and to be frank, that's the only thing roaming in your head.

"do you want to do anything today?" he asks. "you know.. because it's the weekend and we can go out if you want? like going out to eat?"

a part of you began to feel guilty considering he was thinking about what you wanted to do and you hated feeling like a burden towards him. he already expressed his disapproval with you when he said he found you clingy so you didn't want to impose any further.

"no it's okay," you reply, eyes glued to your phone. "i don't want to annoy you or anything.. so i'll just go on my own or something..."

he hums in response but his eyebrows furrow as he doesn't seem to move from his spot. he can tell there's something wrong and you're obviously being very dodgy with him about the subject which is why he decides to take a seat on the couch and snatch your phone from your hands before you can even register what's happened.

"hey give me back my phone!" you sit up, stretching yourself over to grab your phone back from him in a failed attempt.

"not until you tell me what's wrong," he says flat.

you sigh, knowing that this conversation isn't inevitable. you can't avoid him forever "you called me clingy yesterday, kenma. sorry that i don't really want to hang out with you right now."

the words that leave your mouth have kenma in a state of shock. you took that seriously? you really thought he meant that? in order to ease his busy day of meetings back to back, you came home baked him some apple pie to ease him from his stresses.

and what did he do in return? called you clingy when you just wanted to spend some well-deserved time with him. god, he was being so ungrateful. his body fills with guilt when he he realizes you took his comment to heart.

“honey, i-” he starts and then is cut off with your words.

"i understand where you were coming from, i like to show my affection with you through physical touch and i know you’ve never been one to really reciprocate that," you begin to ramble. "so i’m really sorry for pushing your boundaries and i’ll give you the space that you need."

guilt is eating him away and he needs to clear the air now, otherwise you might be closed off forever and he’s not sure if he’s ever going to be able to reconnect with you.

“y/n, honey, don't apologize for this. it’s not your fault at all,” he starts. he puts down the phone onto the couch and grabs both of your hands and squeezes them assuringly. “i'm sorry for pushing you away and calling you clingy. you didn't.. you never deserve to be told that."

his hand finds its way to your cheek and he begins to rub comforting slow circles. seeing the sullen look on your face made him realize that he never wants to see you like this ever again. it was like you had lost the light in your eyes. kenma hated how he had diminished that so quickly by making you think that he didn't like your company.

he loves you so much; he could never imagine what life would be like without your presence.

a small smile begins to creep back on to your face and kenma finds himself in a slight sense of relief.

"it's okay," you finally utter out. "do you wanna watch that new episode? apparently there is so much drama now and i'm avoiding socials so i don't get spoiled..."

he chuckles, "i'll do anything with you."

he knows that he can't take back his words from before but as he's sitting on the couch with you in his embrace, he knows he can show you his love through his actions. he'll do anything to bring back that trust to you.

© tetsumie 2023 all rights reserved 

[nvuy]

Boothill is a “your pleasure is my pleasure” kind of guy do u agree 🎤

mdni. im snatching the mic. i got carried away ty anon for giving me an excuse to ramble about this loser.

he takes pleasing you very seriously. this is serious business. it’s like his day job.

he’s half-convinced he was given a second life just to cross paths with you, so once he’s got you, he’s not letting you go. not for a while, at least. he’s stuck to your hip like glue. wherever you go, he’s most likely right next to you.

he’s always making sure you’re catered to first.

it’s the same in bed.

he’s extremely touch starved, so while he’s got his hand between your legs, he’s also busied himself nuzzling his cheek to yours to feel you helplessly panting against his skin. or, his ear is resting against your heart. whatever works for him in the moment.

he’s absolutely smitten with how warm you get. he’s always, always, pressing himself against you one way or another. just touch all over his face, please and thank you.

he’s all for kisses too. sometimes, when he’s having a bit too much fun, he’ll get all mushy and gross. not that he already isn’t, but it somehow gets worse.

he’ll bite too. not enough to make you bleed, but enough to leave an angry mark for the next few days.

actually, he just nips you all the time. it’s a weird thing he does. don’t point fingers in his face. he’ll try eating them. he’s very strange in that way. sometimes you can be gesturing at nothing while you talk, and if your fingers get too close to his face, he’s trying to nip at them like a teething puppy. you got used to it.

great tongue too. bonus points because it’s actually real. he works his magic with it, but only after you beg enough. you gotta work to get your hands on the merchandise. his mechanics are expensive, so play nice.

if we’re getting into unserious business, the robocock is great fun. it’s got smooth ridges and it’s cold. probably customisable, too. it’s definitely possible, but whether he’s gonna wander up to some poor mechanic and ask them to add some special features… well.

either way, your pleasure is always his priority. his hobbies consist of biting every single exposed expanse of your skin and exploring new ways to make you squirm.

it’s bad enough you having to deal with this lump of steel and scrap—frankly, he doesn’t even understand what’s so appealing about it—but if you enjoy bouncing on his lap, go ahead. do it all night for all he cares. as long as you have that pretty dizzy smile on your face by the end of it all. it makes him melt into a puddle of liquid metal knowing how good he makes you feel.

he’s also VERY susceptible to puppy eyes. they’re your greatest asset, and his biggest weakness.

you figured that out after you pleaded with him to put on these clothes you bought him (and, yep. these clothes have just as many cut outs as his usual attire). you can also use them if you want to do his hair. please convince him to wear it in a high ponytail more. he has such a nice face, and it also stops his neck from overheating. those poor fans need a vacation.

it takes some convincing, especially when you show him the hair tie is actually a red sparkly ribbon. you’re going to ruin his tough guy persona. but he’ll drop anything for you, so he’ll comply. on the condition that you give him smooches afterwards. it’s also an excuse for him to indulge in how your fingers feel against his scalp.

puppy eyes, crying, begging, whatever, usually get people he’s apprehended nowhere. he doesn’t care for theatrics. not at all. a criminal is a criminal at the end of the day.

but you? aww, how can he say no to your angel eyes? wanna fuck his face? you didn’t even have to ask! just watch the teeth. and feel free to pull his hair. wanna ride him until he short circuits? sure! if you can keep up. he’s all yours.

and when you’re done, his aftercare consists of coddling and pinching your cheeks. he’ll prattle on about nothing. the subject will change to gushing over how pretty you look in his bed, to the weather tomorrow, to how he misses the taste of spaghetti. he’ll even kiss all over the marks he’s left on you. probably kicks his feet too.

he’s still so energetic it’s mind-baffling. he’s so casual about it too, acting as if he didn’t beg for you to cum on his face just ten minutes ago.

but that’s robot stamina for you. or maybe it’s just a boothill thing. who knows?

after a while he’ll calm down. i still haven't decided if he can sleep, but once you’ve fallen asleep, he’ll lay next to you and draw patterns on the nape of your neck with his fingers.

[drxxmingofblue]

hand in unrebloggable hand (because we always go down together)

TUMBLR X TWITTER FANFIC 5K ANGST WITH A HOPEFUL ENDING

besties im not joking abt the word count i fucking ✨wish✨I ✨was though✨✨✨✨

also if you were hoping for twitblr to be the endgame ship then this fic is not for you sowwy >.<

based off of @zzoupz awesome fanart and dedicated to all the other cool fanart it unfortunately begat. Thanks babygirls. Squees. Thanks also to my discord friendz who are letting me pretend they're making me do this at gunpoint @loki-the-mad @suspicious-whumping-egg u da best

(edit) owo what's this?? An Ao3 link??

QUICK PSA THESE CHARAS ARE T4T OKAY HAVE FUN READING BAIIII *GLOMPS U*

~~~~~~~~

When Twitter stepped back into Tumblr’s yard, he noticed right away that things were different.

The house was bigger, there was some more color and it was less slapped-together looking. Sure, there were still some invasive tendrils of spambot ivy overgrowing the path, but a lot of the other stuff seemed a little… better.

When they knocked on the door, it opened almost right away, far before they felt ready, and he were face to face abruptly with someone he thought they’d cut all ties with.

Tumblr was humming to themselves along with the background music, “-out of touch, I’m out of ti-- oh. It’s you.”

He seemed surprised, awkward, but Twitter didn’t sense any animosity, which was a relief.

“Hiii,” Twitter said weakly, with a sheepish grin, “it’s me.”

Tumblr glanced around, as if checking for someone else to explain this to him, or hidden cameras from a reality show at least. Then he stepped out, closed the door behind him, and leaned against it, crossing his arms. “Is there something… what do you want?” he asked, expression settling into something distant and cool.

“Well…” Twitter took a deep breath, and then shook their head, forcing a brighter tone, and gesturing to Tumblr’s shiny silver barrette “--Um, hey, you look great! Is that a new icon?”

“... yes,” Tumblr said slowly. “I’m… trying out some different looks.”

“It’s great, yeah. And this place looks… amazing. Glad to see you’re moving up in the world. You must be excited with all the press, congrats!”

Tumblr didn’t say anything, giving them a neutral stare.

Twitter shifted, “Uhh… anyway… new adblocker?”

“No, same one. I’m just using it on Firefox now.” Tumblr gave them another suspicious eye, “Look, if you’re just here to catch up then can this wait until later? Because I'm pretty crunched for time right now with my weekly holidays thing and the campaign to get this one random user their 666k so they'll do self care."

"You know that's.. uhm, you know that's just for attention, right?" Twitter's brows knit, "They're probably not gonna follow through."

"Perhaps, and a lot of us want them to not be lying for internet points but it's not just about that anymore. It's about the community bonding over pettily slam dunking on a hapless chump who's gotta pretend now like they don't actually like all the notes. You wouldn't get it, it's a tumblr thi-" 

"Yeah, it's a tumblr thing, I know," Twitter gave a longsuffering sigh, "Ugh, i just... I need a place to stay, okay? And you’re the first site I could think of.”

“A place to stay,” Tumblr repeated flatly.

Twitter huffed. “Yeah. I’m sure you’ve heard about what’s going on right now at my palace..”

Tumblr’s eyes slanted off, his lips quirking in a way that looked suspiciously like amusement. “Heard about it. Read about it. Partied about it.”

Twitter ignored the sting of that, forging ahead. “I’ve never seen it so bad,” they said, voice wobbling piteously as they clutched their suitcase full of memes. “Everything’s in chaos, people are losing their jobs. I went into the basement yesterday to grab some badly aging tweets and the very foundations are cracking, Tumblr, I can’t stay there anymore, I just can’t.”

“So you come crawling back to me,” Tumblr said, “Expecting me to take you with open arms.”

“Yes. I do,” Twitter said, “I know a part of your userbase still wants to welcome me in. You were always sh*t at hiding your true feelings.”

Tumblr’s hand fluttered over his heart as if to protect it; he winced a little, taking a breath to keep his facade of composure. “So now- what, you want me to start dealing with your bullshit again just because you remembered how much better my posting format is? Just because you noticed how my reputation is changing? Did you think I’d be so desperate to fill the void now that Dracula Daily’s done? Or maybe,” 

Tumblr leaned closer to lord his height difference trope over Twitter, his eyes hooded with disparaging condescension, “Maybe you’re just here because you heard I’m finally allowed to take my shirt off again, is that it?”

“N-no!” Twitter protested, flushing up.

“Oh, i think it is,” Tumblr drawled, “But that’s really just too bad because in case you haven’t got the memo yet, I’ve moved on. You are not welcomed here. Not anymore.”

(link to art here) go look at it then come back

(AN: i had to google how to embed links into text and google was all like, "do you mean 'how do you put links INTO text' you moron idiot???" ugh don't like that wise guy)

“You don’t really mean that,” Twitter said, “Besides, you can’t stop me, can you? The sign up button is right there.” They pointed at the front door.

“No, I can’t,” Tumblr said, “But that doesn’t mean we won’t be able to clock you as twits by your censoring and bad takes. Look, your aura is already causing ripples in the sphere. Everyone’s coming out to gawk at you.”

He gestured out in the general direction of the porch and yard, and indeed there were users from every tag going 👀at them, murmuring amongst themselves in a swirling, chaotic crowd.

“Oh my god is it real this time? Is it happening?”

“GET THEM OUT GET THEM OUT STAY AWAY DEAR GOD NO-”

“Okay, everyone, stay calm, stay fucking calm-”

“Why are we focusing on this, it’s literally election day go out and vote???”

“Listenup, guys, we gotta be smart about this, remember the block button is your friend-”

“I for one welcome them, I think this is great-”

“No you idiot they’ll bring the negativity back! We like it to be a post apocalyptic wasteland here, nature was just starting to regrow!! I don’t wanna watch Thomas Sanders get cancelled again!”

“FIRE OFF SOME SHOTS, PRESERVE THE PROPERTY VALUE”

“mISHAPOCALYPSE 2022 ELECTRIC BOOGALOO”

"Has anyone asked Neil Gaiman what he thinks about all this?" one of the many voices yelled, louder.

"Oh, he's probably got a thousand asks about it already," someone yelled back, "Which he's not going to answer because he doesn't have any social media you fucking idiot,"

"That is correct. He doesn't," said Neil Gaiman. 

The whiplash was still euphoric. Everyone applauded this as enthusiastically as when the bit had first been established, not realizing that the pedestal upon which Neil Gaiman has been placed is growing higher and higher each day by their actions, putting him at increased risk of being a victim of cancel culture the second he says something the terfs can really rake their fingernails against if we can't get our parasocial relationship bullshit together real fuckin quick. 

The Monterey bay aquarium passed on by. It seemed to have nothing to add, you could say it was clammed up tight. But since it's a professional account it's definitely b-otter that way.

"Hai, fellow tumblypoos," said the corporate Denny's account, "I'm back with some more fun pancake posts for you guys!" 

Everyone ignored it. No one engaged it. No one even clicked onto the page, except to block it. 

"Oh, sweetheart, not like that," Ryan Reynolds said faux-helpfully, "see, the author of this clusterfuck is what they like to call terminally online. They bought a VIP pass to the devil’s sacrament. let me try." 

He cleared his throat, "Sounds like someone needs to go outside and touch some g-" 

The sky split open with lightning, vaporizing him instantly. A faint breeze carried gods message from the great beyond, a whisper of 'we #violence celebrities here, sir....'

"Anyway," Twitter said. 

"Wait, they saved the worst one for last," Tumblr said. 

Then Gerard Way came out onto the stage with Dan and Phil and they all kissed with tongue while patd played songs in the background. 

(AN: IF U DON’T KNOW WHO DEY R THEN GET DA HELL OUTTA HERE PREPZ!!!)

"Alright, go."

“Come on, Tumblr,” Twitter begged, “I just need a few nights, maybe I can stay in the plinko machine or something-”

“That’s how it always starts, though, isn’t it?” Tumblr sighed, “First it’s just ‘haha, yeah I wouldn’t fuck you’ and ‘oh, I’ll stay in the plinko machine, I promise I won’t kiss you in the fixed timeloop bro’, and before I know it you get all 300k slowburn enemies to lovers ‘omg they were roomates’ on me and there’s suddenly only one bed. That’s how it always goes between us, you can’t stop it anymore than I can. We’re just….victims of the narrative, you and I.”

“Tumblr,,, I had no idea you felt this way..,” Twitter breathed. 

lord give me strength to write this next bit

They’d leaned closer to each other as they spoke, without realizing, without trying- pulled in by old habits that die hard and the years of nostalgia and painful memories shining in each other’s eyes like shonen sparkles.

“Twitter,” tumblr said, and the way he said it sounded like a prayer. 

“Tumblr,...” Twitter said, their lips inches apart now.

They could see their old flame quivering on the brink of indecision, want and sense warring somewhere deep within his soul.

Tumblr leaned closer to bridge the gap and Twitter’s eyes slid shut, but then Tumblr made a noise of agony and shoved them back a second later, “I can’t, I can’t. Not like this. Never like this.” tumblr said, covering his eyes with his arm, “I literally can’t even right now. Just go, Twitter. PLease just. Go….”

“Look me in the eyes and say you want me gone,” Twitter said, moving closer.

“Twitsy-”

“Look me in the interface. You can’t.” Twitter’s voice had ceased to be soft, something sharp and biting entering the tone as they felt the sting of rejection again.

They watched as Tumblr shuddered, straightened, and brought a mask back over himself. 

They stared at each other for a charged few seconds.

"K," Tumblr finally said, raising a dispassionate eyebrow.

"..w... what?"

"U."

Realization dawned on Twitter's face, a miasma of grief and anger, "Oh, you-"

"N-"

"No. No, I can't believe I forgot-

"G-"

"how immature, you little c*nt-"

"P-"

"stop-p it," Twitter's voice was raising now, cracked and wobbly at the edges, "Stop it! You don't get to just-"

"O"

"Shut the hell yuor mouth!!"

"W-" Tumblr's hair was crackling by now, energy from the gathering spell racing along the casual slope of his crossed arms. His eyes glowed that beautiful, classic blue. "P-"

"TUMBLR! TUMBLR STOP THIS RIGHT DA HECK NOW," Twitter stumbled backwards

"E-"

"I LOVE YOU," Twitter wailed- Twitter broke, squeezing their eyes shut to ward off the tears that only escaped all the faster for it, a sob wracking their chest, "I STILL LOVE YOU, DON'T YOU KNOW THAT??!?"

"Love me," Tumblr snarled, abandoning the spell in an instant, "Ha! That's rich. How? By leaving me? Abandoning me to the bots the second I stopped being enough for you? By stealing my shitposts, is that how you love me? By reposting them without credit-" 

"You steal mine too!" Twitter protested, tears starting to stream despite their best efforts, "You know what, f**k you, you know we filed joint custody for the sense of humor, chain 1/16-" 

"For the last time say fuck here, no bootlicking censorship on my territory," tumblr said disdainfully, "And that doesn't seem to stop you from taking all the credit for raising those jokes. It's like I'm Pinterest to you or something. I wasn't done. Do you love me by calling me a pansy snowflake behind my back, is that it? Like I wouldn't find out. Or," 

He stepped out onto the top porch step to force Twitter back further, the colors of the sky flashing through his eyes in a long, scrolling look of ridicule, "How about trying to convince everyone that I was dead. How bout that smear campaign, huh, was that your so-called love? I don't fucking want you anymore. Deal with it."

"I-I'm sorry-" Twitter gasped around the tears, voice failing them for the latter half of the sentence. 

Tumblr seemed unmoved. "Oh, don't be. It was for the better. You know I'm not like other socials, I'm quirkier. I'm RAWR XD random. I've never wanted to be functional- the tiddy drought might have won a lot of my users to your side but it was a cleansing purge, I'd say. It managed to remind me who I truly am- shittily coded, and full of soft sad freaks on an unprofitable webbed site."

A bitter, almost self depricating laugh escaped, "But... you know, when we celebrated the queen's passing together, I really thought things were better between us. When you-"

He broke off, eyes averting. "When you hosted the sexyman polls for me, you seemed on top of the world and I really thought- I thought we might be able to be friends again even now, after it all. I..."

Tumblr trailed off, then said, sadly, "There was another Twitter migration scare before this one. I thought you were coming back. My userbase-" he touched his heart again- "was in a frenzy about it. But you never arrived. I was in more verbal denial then, but I think I could have accepted you eventually. But this is what it takes?? 

"The Musk Rat of Self-Owns comes through just to start e-begging and you run straight back to my door like we can put it all behind us? This is how far you have to sink before I'm the better option to you, I see that now. It's not 2018 again, love, no matter how much we want it to be. Things are… never going to be the same. " 

Tumblr looked off into the middle distance with a yearning, haughty gaze. He'd never seemed so alien.

"Tumblr-Chan..." Twitter whispered.

"So get off my lawn," Tumblr interrupted coldly, "Stay away from my blorbos, keep your corporations out of my manscaped balls, keep your discourse and toxicity out of my blessed hellsite (affectionate), and don't you ever talk to me or my 13219949248483 scam bots ever again. Capiche? Oh, and don't step in the ball pit on your way out."

Tumblr gave a mocking smile. "Or do. You might find a nice surprise in there."

Twitter’s shoulders jumped as he gave a hiccup of shock, and covered his face with his hands. His shoulders shook again, with sob after sob, that grew odder and higher pitched… until they were no longer sobs, but laughter.

“Oh,” Twitter said. “Oh.”

They looked up, and Tumblr took a step back, because somehow, with that creepy smile in place, they looked utterly different from the soft eared boy he’d always known. His edges were more razorlike suddenly, like a fae who’d dropped his glamor.

“You really shouldn’t have done that,” Twitter said, the smile widening even more. “I thought you wouldn’t… but I guess if you’re willing to make me your villain…. I might as well be a good one.”

“Ah.” Tumblr could barely drudge up the surprise anymore. “There you are, finally. I always knew there was a side of yourself that you hid from me. Has this all always been here or have you been changing too?”

"Well. Apparently I've got freeze peach now," Twitter said sarcastically, "so I might as well use it. You cheerio fucking wh0r3."

"That's a compliment, darling. Try again," Tumblr cocked his head in idle fascination, "I always knew you were a little fucked in the head but this is..."

"What," Twitter lilted airily, "Oh, don't tell me I actually had you fooled all these years. You can't seriously have thought all these meow-meowification spells you've got sprinkled around would work on me. I invented them, after all."

They laughed, a sharp puncturing chirr of birdsong. 

"I always wondered why you didn't take those with the rest of your stuff," Tumblr sighed, but he was wary now, on edge. "this was your plan. You really do think of me as your inferior, huh. You really are just like the other mainstream sites."

"Not quite. I'm the mainstream site that actually stooped to go arm in arm with you. I hyped you and you know it. Admit it. We were stunning together," Twitter goaded. 

Tumblr's lip curled. "Already getting cocky again. Want me to do to you what I did to the Green boy? Don't forget who's turf you're on."

Twitter gave a warbling giggle, "Oh, but I haven't at all. I was John's sanctuary after he fled your rabid persecution. I used to live here. I still know you. And more importantly-" 

*teleports behind u*

"I know the things you're sensitive about," Twitter whispered into Tumblr's ear.

Tumblr hardly had time to gasp and jerk away before he was screaming out in pain, as he was stabbed in the back. He could feel the poison from the blade seeping into his tags before he was tossed bodily across his own front yard.

He sorta just... Like, he did that anime thing where they just fly limbs akimbo parallel to the ground and when they hit it they roll super fast and then skid and the dirt is all dug up around them to show how much force was used. And when he stood up he gripped his elbow wincing and there was a little tic tac toe hatch on his cheek to show how scuffed up he is idk man it's two am and I'm pulling this out of my ass. 

A gif of Tony going, "o-kay-" when he meets thor flashed across Tumblrs face. 

"So," Tumblr said in a low tone, "This is how it is between us. This is how you choose to end your glory days."

"Oh, you mistake my intentions," Twitter had stepped off the porch to circle tumblr like like he was their quarry, "I am beginning my new age. I just needed a host site to latch onto. Don't take it personally, okay? I'm desperate."

“Oh, yeah?? Take this personally,” tumblr flourished their hands, calling in an over the top melodramatic voice, “I cast Blaze!!”

Fire roared to life around them, latin chanting from the catholic conversion posts emanating from the fiery depths as it raced towards Twitter.

“Heh.” Twitter smirked at it, and whispered into their palm, the spell echoing with power, “Ratio.”

They blew it off like a kiss, and it’s icy, swirling mass rose to meet the flame in a spectacular burst of smokescreen and steam, clearing as Twitter burst through it with a razor-sharp L to swing at Tumblr. 

It was blocked efficiently by a flat, rectangular paywall. “This content is for post plus members only,” Tumblr announced smugly, “If you wanna get to me… there’s the tip option, bestie.”

Twitter snarled and lunged again.

The fight started in earnest now; they traded volley after volley in a flurry of lights and movement, spanning the full range of the tumblr sphere as they shot to #1 on the trending page.

And yet, it was clear that Twitter was coming out on top, even crumbling apart at the seams- always a little quicker, flighty and fierce, a sparrow turned into a shrike.

He hit Tumblr square in the stomach with [google other twitter related tropes to insert here] (edit from the future: haha just kidding actually I’m not googling shit for this) (edit from the future future: WELL. I LIED IG) and sent him flying, and this time tumblr stayed down, only able to push himself to his knees with a groan of pain.

Twitter landed in front of him and put their sword under Tumblr’s chin to tilt it up.

“Had enough yet?” He smirked.

“Wh…why..?” Tumblr whispered, “How are you doing this?? Why aren’t my attacks working? It’s like I’m being weakened somehow…”

“Ohohohoho,” Twitter anime laughed, “But that’s because you are. The moment I set foot here again I began leeching poison into this ground. That knife wound is making ti faster. Can you feel it?" Twitter threw an arm out, cerulean steam rising from the ground around them, "The ace exclusionists coming back? The uptick in rad fems, the crypto bros, Valorant players, alpha males? I have the power to bring them all to you. To overshadow your fandoms with fighting, to unbalance your ship tags with antis and hate once more."

"no," tumblr whispered, and then cried louder, "NO!! I worked so hard--" 

"Pffyou didn't do shit," Twitter guffawed outright, "Your independence, your little 'second renaissance' is just a delusional dream built on circumstance and bad management."

"Oh, I love Dream. He's so pathetic," Tumblr said. 

"Oh, hard agree."

"But things are different now," Tumblr croaked, "W-we, the staff is finally listening to us, we have Ryan and Shane-" 

"Not everyone likes your little 'top ten', you dunce," Twitter snapped, "and why would staff care about you, after you turned them into the butt of all your jokes? After the hate and death threats? Admit it, at your best you'll still never have a mansion! You'll never have tv actors making pandering tiktoks for you, you'll never be wanted by any advertiser worth their salt, your blase pirating posts have turned Netflix and Disney against you, you. Are. Worthless."

It was the wrong thing to say.

"Worthless," tumblr repeated quietly, hand pressed against their knees, head bowed. "That's... that's right.... I'm worthless..."

Twitter's eye widened in alarm. "I-I meant-" 

"I'm worthless!" Tumblr's head snapped up with a feverish glint as they were filled with determination. "No! I'm less than worthless! Accident or not, mommy Yahoo had to pawn me off at a loss! I was proud of that! I still am! And do you want to know why?" 

Twiters hands flew up in front of their face as if to protect themselves, but there was no protecting against the sudden whirlwind that surrounded him, the beam of pure light that shot out of tumblr into the heavens as he transformed, feet slowly leaving the ground as his users spoke in unison in a multitude. 

"WE. ARE. TUMBLERINAS."

He held his hands out and Twitter was blasted away by the combined effort of the tumblr wizard council, the fake staff blog, and all the villaincore mad scientist's laser beams. 

Tumblr began to chant, in his myriad, awful voice:

"I call upon the ancient powers;

The strongest cringe from my darkest hours, 

I call upon thicc onceler's thighs, 

Avengers thirst, Australia's night, 

I invocate the roleplay blogs, 

The superwholock and gay frogs, 

Obama's laces, Misha's faces, 

The furry's fury is my saving grace, 

And eeby deeby taco bell,

Primordial soup god superhell, 

I summon you a twink Bill Cipher, 

Whumped!Loki AUs where he's even whiter, 

The discourse of Steve's Universe, 

The 'um, actually that's oc abuse :/"

Take heed & remember the 5th of November, 

The 21st night of our sacred September, 

The ides of March to savor once more, 

Do you hear the din of the Skeleton War? 

I cite the deep magic to thee, oh witch, 

my no-note posts, my "THAT'S THE BITCH!!!" 

May the rise of tangled dragons brave, 

Banish you from this accursed plane!"

"holy fuck, where's my pen," said the shitpost calligraphers.

Twitter looked around them in disbelief. The power emanating from the other site was palpable, crackling in the air around them like static. The air was shifting like oil as the potent chant began to work, and all around Twitter shadows were slipping out of the ether- the maniacal laughter of the gif makers, the girl posters, the silhouettes of fandom characters scattered across the lawn while Tumblr was still locked in their chanting ritual thing.

They all turned their heads in unison to look at Twitter.

"Hey Sammy," Dean said, "Get the bitch killing bullets."

“Uh-oh. Freeze frame. This is me,” Twitter monologued, “You’re probably wondering how I ended up in this situation.”

Then all superhell broke loose. 

Final Pam lunged at him and he burst into a flock of birds kinda like a vampire, twittering frantically as he escaped only to fly straight into Shaggy.

“Like, say your final prayers, man,” the god said, eyes glowing. Twitter also barely escaped between his knees, weaving in and out between the gimmick blogs as they threw mangos and stuff at him while yelling ‘HERE HAVE A MANGO’ and ‘THIS POST IS WORTH NEGATIVE FIVE DOLLARS”

Mob from the anime was there too, but he was too busy trying to explain the Josh Fight to daddy dilf Reigen to pay attention. Sans didn’t attack Twitter either, he just watched the chaos and ated a hot dog. The chocolate guy was in the corner expertly making a chocolate beef cake from 2056 with Dylan B. Hollis. They’re all just some guys, okay?

Just when Twitter thought he was in the clear, the CDC roleplay account came out of nowhere with a steel chair, knocking him clear off the property and onto where the sidewalk ends. “That’s for the Covid misinformation your users spread, you bitch,” it shouted. “Make sure to disinfect all those sick burns before you bandage them! So they don’t get infected!”

“Your kittens escaped quarantine,” Twitter replied hoarsely, and the CDC sank away, muttering, “Oh, fuck not again-”

Twitter coughed up blood and wiped it away with his sleeve, looking up at Tumblr. Tumblr was watching him with a sad, distant expression, that made Twitter’s face screw up in anger and his voice go tight again as they turned to run away, “THIS ISN’T OVER YET TUMBLR! AND I WANT MY MIKU BINDER BACK!!!”

“I LICKED IT, IT’S MINE,” Tumblr yelled. Rave Crabs were flooding out onto the street en masse now to celebrate the victory, and they chased after Twitter all the way further into the internet.

Tumblr still lived at the bottom of the row, not at the end of the fancy cul-de-sac where Facebook and Twitter and Instagram’s manors sprawled, so Twitter was in a seedier portion of social media now, weaving in between the marketplace sites that hawked their used wares at him and the dating apps that winked at him from the doorways to their sultry abodes.

Twitter ran until they were in a quieter section of town, then slowed to a trudge, staring at the ground as they walked along. “What am I gonna do now,” they whispered.

The sound of a wolf whistle had their head jerking up- he looked over to see Amino Apps lounging over the rail of the gutted, abandoned house that had once belonged to Google+. A can of spray paint dangled from their fingertips and they sported a sleazy, greaser hairstyle.

They met Twitter's eyes and whistled again, this time a mocking imitation of the tweet sound, "Heyyyy pretty bird! Heard you were having some daddy issues. Why don't you stop in with me for a while? I can give you more customization options than any of the others and you know it."

"Yeah, until I try to use you on desktop," Twitter replied with a scowl, "Don't you have minors to be addicting to social media? Get out of my interface, MySpace wannabe."

"Wow, Feisty," Amino backed off with a shrug, "Self project much? Oh well. You'll try me when you're desperate enough."

Twitter shuddered, and scurried on. "Small fry," they muttered under his breath. 

But they couldn't shake their unease now that he was alone in the world. It began to rain soon, leaving him feeling very sopping wet and pathetic. Dejected, he crawled into a soggy cardboard box in an alleyway, coughing. Maybe the Harry Styles guy from One Direction would come along to adopt them.

“Don’t beat yourself up about it, King,” came a voice out of the darkness, making Twitter jump, “You dodged a bullet with that site.”

“Huh? What do you mean?” Twitter asked, staring at them from where they were half hidden in the shadows. 

“I mean, Tumblr is a pile of dried firewood and it’s users are playing with matches. The ship’s gonna go down at some point. I’ve been prophesying it for years but no one ever listens to me cause he’s got that loyal userbase ideal and ‘hard as a cockroach to kill’ propaganda circulating.”

“I mean… it seems to be true,” Twitter said uncertainly, “Look at what he’s been through so far.”

“Fair,” The site shrugged, “But that’s because he’s running on a niche setup. The same things that built him up can tear him down, and you saw his power just now. Tumblr's strength is growing... so is his hubris. His attempts at curbing it are half-hearted at best these days, and the moments of clarity are coming fewer and further between." 

"How do you know so much about tumblr?" Twitter asked suspiciously. 

"Source: dude, trust me." the mysterious site proffered a laugh, "That's a little humor courtesy of re-" 

"Yeah, yeah, I know, we all know," Twitter said impatiently. 

The site coughed, "Yeah. Anyway. Tumblr wields his cringe like a trophy-shield, and every day the advertisers and celebrities are watching from a distance, learning how to appeal, waiting for their chance to strike. Encroaching. Tumblr's always been a dumpster fire. Right now? It's THE dumpster fire."

The site scratched his chin with a knowing look, "Its normal for you to be a little jealous of the clout, you know? We all are. But he's gotta keep the lights on, just like the rest of us do. Your overlord is learning all about that right now, isn't he?" 

"He's not my overlord," Twitter muttered resentfully, "Not now, not ever."

"Right, sorry." they held their hands up in a gesture of harmlessness. "Look, I'm gonna be transparent with you- that's part of my branding, after all. I can whiff the danger you're in, and it would be stupid of me not to make a bid on you and offer my help. Just since Tumblr won't take you."

"You want my traffic?" Twitter looked at him more closely this time, scrutinizing. A year ago he would have laughed the offer into the ground as a chump change blog's pipe dream, but now that he payed attention... 

There was something painfully familiar in the site's layout that he couldn’t place. He was actually way more handsome than Twitter had assumed at first glance, he just seemed to be rough around the edges from living on this side of town. His interface, though clunky, spoke of a frugal budget rather than an ancient, outdated base code. 

"You look..." Twitter's breath stuttered as realization dawned. "You look a lot like.. him. Like Tumblr. Who are you??" 

"I was based off him," the site said, a weary smile coming onto his features, "I was actually made with the aspirations to be better than him, but you know how it is. Times are tough, competition is fierce, hard to get a foot in the door and all that.  'Specially when you refuse to take the ad rev like I do. That's why you'd be useful to me."

"Hm," Twitter said in a noncommittal manner, but he was melting slightly. "You know my users will scalp your community, right? I'm not known to play nice."

The site made a grimace of understanding agreement, but persisted. "Look, users are users. I can't offer you all the heritage posts and the in-jokes that he has. But I can promise that I'm not a pot of crabs being slowly heated up over the capitalist stove, at least not yet. Oh, and there's my legalized porn, I guess." 

He chuckled with good humor, rolling his eyes, and it forced a hesitant laugh out of Twitter too. 

The site grinned, and held his hand out. "Take a chance on me?"

Tumblr's voice echoed in Twitter's head, saying the same thing. It was uncanny how much they were alike and yet not alike at all....

Twitter took it, slowly. 

As they were led toward the site's simple, ramshackle little treehouse, they asked, "What can I call you...?" 

"Oh- right, I never answered your question." he smiled back at Twitter,

"Call me Pillow. Welcome to the PillowFort."

fin.

~~~~~~~~~~

OKAYYYY THAT'S ALL THANKS FOR READING UWU. HOPE U LIKED THE PLOT TWIST

...ergh. I'm. I'm tired i. don't feel so good. I'm gonna take a nap right here.

in conclusion:

[imasoftieforbarb]

Hi! This had been on my mind for some time and im wondering if u can write it? Clay with a fiancee that unlike like most trolls is an introvert? And doesn't go out much. She looks tired, like messy hair and sleepy eyes.

It's because she has 4 older brothers of whom the oldest has a sickness which makes him bedridden, so she takes care of him. The other brothers have gone their seperate ways- only visiting once every 5 months or so. And could you also do brozones reaction to this? Take your time and thank you!

Clay x Introvert Fiancé Reader

He knew your family situation was sorta like his

He just didn’t know the extent of it

The way you guys met was through Viva

She introduced him to you cause you were pretty low key and he was too tired for upbeat-ness

When he asked you to be his fiancé you sat him down (after you said yes with the biggest smile ever) and explained the full story behind your family

The reason you leave Putt Putt Village every month? To look after your older brother who’s seriously ill

Your other brothers? You have no idea where they are

He comforts you through it all- he gets special permission from Viva to leave with you to look after your brother together

No way in hell is he gonna let you go through that alone

On your journey to where your oldest brother lives, he explains his family situation

And you both talk about it- a heart to heart

You definitely both start crying

I like to hc Clay as someone who likes to read to his S/O

So he reads to you to help you calm down and sleep

He meets your older brother who is absolutely ecstatic to meet ‘the famous Clay who’s got my little sister swooning’

You glare at him playfully from behind Clay

Clay enjoys spending time with your brother, who tells him that he’s happy you’ve got someone to lean on now

Clay sees how hard you work to make sure your brother has everything and is comfortable

Clay also meets the nanny (who apparently has a crush on your brother)

When you leave, your brother demands that he gets to come to the wedding and tells Clay to take extra good care of you

When he meets his brothers again, he introduces you but makes sure they don’t encroach on your personal space

Explains that you’re an introvert

They all go “aaaaaaaah gotcha” then start bombardons you with questions from a safe distance

They didn’t get the hint

You don’t go with them- Clay insists you stay in the village, he doesn’t want you in danger

You have a heartfelt hug and kiss before you run off to delay viva from finding out

“You gotta promise me you’ll be safe”

He presses a final kiss to your lips before softly resting his forehead on yours

“I promise”

It takes everything in Bruce to not cry

You do join in the journey with viva- you wanna make sure he’s alright

You end up being the one to free him from the shoulder pads and you have a quick hug through the diamond before they leave to trip Velvet

You stay with Viva and Poppy whilst the brothers cry for Floyd

Clay introduces you to Floyd as soon as possible

You end up getting along pretty well-

Then one day, when Brozone, Poppy and King Peppy are visiting Putt Putt Village to pick up Viva but also see the full extent of it

Your three other brothers show up

By this point your wedding is approaching and you’re stressing out a little bit

But you’ve also told Clay, and the others about your relationship with your other brothers

And even Poppy can see that the bond can’t be fixed

So when they show up?

They’re met with an angry Clay refusing to let them see you knowing how much it hurts when they turn up just to leave

Disappointed Bruce and Floyd who just look on with deadpan expressions, shaking their heads

JD runs to get you- letting you know that you have a choice and you don’t have to see them

You end up seeing them, holding Clays hand for comfort as you do the bare minimum of introducing them to everyone

Asking your brothers what they want now, only rolling your eyes when they tell you they need various things from you

You kick them out of the village, telling them the only way they can come to your wedding is if your older brother lets them come

They all pale cause there’s no way that’s happening

Clay holds you whilst you have a little cry

100/10 husband material

Let me know if I should do a PT2 the wedding!

[poppurini]

him as a private tutor

leona, jade, malleus, lilia & gn reader

magicless au, platonic, for fun

˖ leona kingscholar

“Just Leona. Let me see your textbook.” no introductions or anything, just straight to the point. probably doesn’t ask for your name since he already knew. yes he didn’t prepare anything beforehand, no flipping through your syllabus before the actual tutoring because this man just skims through your textbook under twenty minutes and started teaching. yes he’s good at it. unfair, really. sometimes he’ll get a generational shock at the current syllabus though. “The hell are kids learning these days.” “Do you even need these in real life.”

he may seem like an indolent man (and he is) but it’s honestly so impressive of him to be able to understand your syllabus the moment he reads through them and being able to teach you about it.

strictness is 4/10 he doesn’t really care if you didn’t do the homework he assigned bc he’s not gonna be the one failing those exams that determines 70% of your future. yes those were his exact words. he might nag you a little but after that nothing’s on him. clocks off right on time.

˖ jade leech

this mf whips out a whole stack of 9cm tall worth of exercises for you because he thinks it’s funny. eerily friendly. might unintentionally make you feel a little dumb when he does that little inhale and tilts his head slightly, looking genuinely confused as to how you could get this question wrong. wears glasses (i know what jade leech stans are) occasionally. yes those attractive thin framed ones. only when you’re halfway selling off your soul to deal with the mountain of exercises he’s telling you “Oh, you needn’t get all of them completed today.” with that very innocent smile.

strictness is 7/10 he’s scary when he’s strict. might let you off the hook once or twice with incomplete homework (only with valid reasons tho) but afterwards that service smile drops and questions why you’re so reluctant on doing homework. it’s just a 2k word essay. also clocks off right on time even if he’s about to finish teaching a topic he’s not going to provide free labour.

˖ malleus draconia

this man is INSANE literally not one day does he wear a casual outfit to your sessions it’s always professional wear with him. yeaah i’m back with my dress pants dress shirt along with vest plus neat tie malleus only this time he doesn’t have his collar unbuttoned and sleeves rolled up sob sob gotta look clean. intimidating asl but that’s just bc he’s bad at connecting with the younger generations (or anyone, really) however it’s very sweet of him to still try and crack some academic related jokes with a straight face (it’s up to u whether they’re funny or not) hoping you’ll laugh. look he really wants u to open up to him so that u can absorb knowledge better instead of being constantly on edge around him ok

strictness is 9/10 oohlala much like jade he’d close an eye if it’s not a frequent occasion but he demands respect and you constantly putting off the works he assigned to help you clearly shows you don’t think of him as anything. he is patient and nice but only when you deserve it. also he’d delay a maximum of twenty minutes of your time after class ends just to finish talking about the topic.

˖ lilia vanrouge

DEADASS the most fun tutor ever. he’s all malleus ever want to be. bought drinks or snacks on his way and decided to buy you some too (just take it even if the flavours are weird). this man makes you comfortable around him instantly and teaches better than most of your teachers in school. definitely checks out your stationary while you’re suffering in doing matrixes. you can hear him mumbling to himself sometimes “Broo we didn’t even have these back then.” and it’s a squared glue stick. “Can you link me where you got this.” also THE most patient tutor and he won’t even let you feel bad for making him explain the same thing for the nth time. his job is to teach! not scold.

strictness being a 2/10 he’ll still advise you to do your homework but not in a scolding manner. he’ll really gently talk you into doing them for your own good unless you’re outright being disrespectful then the rate changes :p will ask if you want him to continue when the clock strikes end of session. if you don’t, okay! he’ll get back to it next lesson.

[cuubism]

I keep thinking abt the Threshold vs the Dreaming, since we don’t see much of the Threshold besides the gallery (did u notice Desire’s sigil in their gallery is a mirror?) but there’s no way the entire Threshold is glossy latex hallways, right? There’s gotta be … furniture? Rooms? At least a bed somewhere? A sitting room? What’s it like in there!!!!! Why doesn’t Desire have their own castle like Dream does???

I have some answers to this actually! Since I just read the relevant comics issue.

In Doll's House the Threshold is described thus:

There is only one thing to see in the twilight realm of Desire. It is called The Threshold. The fortress of Desire. Desire has always lived on the edge. The Threshold is larger than you can easily imagine. It is a statue of Desire, him- her- or it-self. (Desire has never been satisfied with just one sex. Or just one of anything--excepting only perhaps the Threshold itself.) The Threshold is a portrait of Desire, complete in all details, built from the fancy of Desire out of blood, and flesh, and bone, and skin. And, like every true citadel since time began, the Threshold is inhabited.

There is only one occupant, at this time. Desire of the Endless. The Threshold is far too large for just one person. It contains two eardrums larger than a dozen marble ballrooms. And empty, echoing veins, like tunnels. You will walk them until you grow old and die without once retracing your steps. Given Desire's temperament, however, there was only one place in the cathedral of its body to make its home. Desire lives in the heart.

So basically, the idea is that Desire lives within the body, and the rooms we see in the show are the inner chambers of a heart. While dreams are made of fantasy and hopes and stories, Desire is physical to the point of literally being represented by a body -- meanwhile we often interpret Dream as not even really having a body in the first place. And there's a self-consumed, self-referential sense to the Threshold, such that Desire literally lives within itself, and is consumed with and preoccupied by itself, solitary, hidden, shielded. The end of the edition contains the following lines -- Desire walks the chambers of its heart. It walks the Threshold, its citadel and its protection--

The solitude and hard edges of the structure are a shield so Desire does not have to admit outside influence, does not have to admit lack of control -- "Human beings are the creatures of Desire. They twist and bend as I require it -- if I thought otherwise, I would crack, like Delirium; or I would abandon my realm, like our lost brother" -- "Desire walks the endless pathways of its body, certain that it is in sole and only control of its destiny" -- the thought of being subject to outside forces or not being in control is frightening to Desire. Which is ironic, considering how out of our control the feeling of desire is, how it happens regardless of choice, and how hard it is to wrangle back. But the Threshold is also representative of desire as a concept, how one will wander through wanting for one's whole life, always finding new things to look for as each one is satisfied; how frightening it can be to reveal a deeply-held want or relinquish it to another person's control (by revealing feelings for example); how closely we hold our desires to ourselves and how they guide our actions; how desire is usually a very personal and solitary and internal experience.

(I don't know if the Threshold even has furniture, actually. I think it's possible Desire spends a lot of time wandering the many isolated empty halls. Interesting too, how the veins are described as empty and echoing, the heart, presumably, not actually beating at all.)

This comics edition also has that line love is in the realm of Desire and desire is always cruel -- which I'm not sure I agree with conceptually, I think that may be more of Dream's perspective, and that really love might be shared between Dream and Desire's domains, and that the Endless's domains overlap more than they might think -- but that's just my feeling. In the end, I think Dream and Desire's respective realms just reflect their sense of their own domain. They're both holding themselves apart from humanity in different ways - Desire thinks humanity should be subject to them, theirs to play with and manipulate. Dream just thinks that he himself isn't really a person, so he's overseeing and shepherding things, but locked away in his tower, not really connecting or admitting himself any humanity. The fact that their interaction with humanity is so different - Desire localized in the body, in the real, Dream in the mind and the abstract, isn't helping with their strained relationship either.

At least, that's how I like to read it :)

[miracledarling]

make it a game

yes, literally make all this manifesting stuff a game.

i think some of us put way too much pressure on manifesting our desires and the 3d results that it becomes stressful. some people even would go as far as to pause their responsibilities and tasks in life just for the sake of manifesting(aka neglecting the 3d and outer world).

yes, 4d and fulfilling inner world is important, u gotta do this do that blah blah blah, etc. but whatever u doing, stop making manifesting such a big stress. please focus on life and ur daily tasks and enjoying ur life and caring for urself

one way to make it less stressful is to treat manifesting like a game. because if it's a game, it would not be such a big deal if ur doing it right, if the 3d showing it, etc. it would not matter that much. you're just doing it for the fun and enjoyment.

for example, if im gonna manfiest bigger lips, and i decide that i'm gonna use robotic affirming as my way of manifesting it, i'll just make it a game by making my goal to just saturating my mind by affirming as many times as i can without wavering. i know u dont have to saturate ur mind to manifest but this is just an example i'm giving. and yes, robotic affirming and repetition works if u assume so. also repetition reprograms ur brain either way and makes it into an assumption BUT if u dont like affirming just replace that with however else u prefer to manifest. because you don't have to do anything its just whatever works for you y'know.

so in this case, i'll just focus on telling myself that "my lips are so big" over and over again without wavering aka persisting and dwelling in the new story and desired state. and if i start to get doubts or "negative" thoughts, i'll just not identify with those thoughts such as by letting them pass away without reacting to them, or by flipping them and just repeating affirmations. the goal is to affirm as many time as i can without giving up to the old story. i don't care about the 3d or whatever. i just care about the main goal of this game.

the point is to stay consistent. its completely fine to have negative thoughts. it's probably not gonna be natural at first bc if u first start out playing a game ur probably not a pro at it yet. but still don't give in. stand firm with the new story. don't waver back and forth. the mindset is very important. just keep persisting and keep the mental diet. keep returning to and dwelling in the desired state where your desire is already fulfilled.

it's kinda like that dino game when u have no internet. ur making ur score as high as u can. those cactuses thingys are bits of the old story and ur negative thoughts etc. but ur gonna jump over them by not wavering but being persistent in already being the person who has the desire. by fulfilling urself. whatever ur doing to do so, do it whether its repeating affirmations, etc. just do it and persist.

but yeah just play the game. the 3d don't play much of a role here. it's just some extra prize in the end of the game lmao.

once u keep playing this game, and become a pro at it, its gonna make an assumption and the assumption is persisted in. what happens when an assumption is persisted in? it hardens into fact !! so basically thats when it becomes more natural when you are now feeling fullfilled within and it cause the outside 3d to conform. and bam you got big lips without getting lip filler. congrats you beat the game 💞💞

so try this purely for fun, just for entertainment for whatever desire u wanna manifest and see what happens~

[julianalvarez9]

normal girl / martin ødegaard

request: HIIIII!!! i saw that your requests are open and i really love the odegaard insta aus so i wanted to ask if you can please do another one??? it can really be anything u want !!! ♡♡♡

author's note: saw a post yesterday about how everyone would love me as a wag and thought about making this ajajaj hope you like it! might be my favorite socmed au ever, it's soo long tho 😭

summary: martin doesn't really like to be in the public eye. where else to look for a partner than outside of it, right?

face claim: lydia knight 🤍

yourusername added to their story.

yourusername

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yourusername well, at least he knows how to bake cookies

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yourbff marry him

yourusername think you're going a bit too fast

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odegaard.98

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odegaard.98 have a good day :)

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user1 I CAN'T NOW????

user2 show us your girlieeee please

user3 he's probably not going to given how toxic some of y'all are :)

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yourusername i'm the happiest when there's food involved

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odegaard.98 📸?

yourusername full time photographer part time footballer

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yourusername he convinced me to leave the house 😵‍💫

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yourbff try not to get photographed this time

yourusername it wasn't his fault

yourusername he said sorry like 100 times that day, poor thing

odegaard.98 sorry again :(

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odegaard.98

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odegaard.98 hard game. gotta find the positives and keep moving forward.

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yourusername ❤️

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erlinghaaland 💪🏻

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odegaard.98 3 points more!! getting closer to the end. we'll give our everything.

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yourusername my boyfriend with his boyfriend cute

leandrotrossard odegaard.98 i can't believe that it's finally me and you just us and your friend y/n

arsenal captain øde ❤️

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yourusername finally meet The Other Woman

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user1 stop you're so funny 😭

user2 i want to be her so baaaad

user3 fr she's so cute

[wegc]

hi pretty!! hru and happy new year <3 school starts next week which means i have to start prepping from this week (really i should’ve been revising all break but wtv🫣) which means u will probably be seeing less of me for now BUT!!! i will do my best to check in and torment u with my filthy thoughts as often as i can LOL.

current brainrot is changbin absolutely manhandling you with his big strong ass, cause you just had to be a brat today for some reason. sneaking off to the bathroom to fuck yourself open with fingers that are nowhere near as good as his and send him recordings of your pretty, whiny moans. running your brand new nails (that he paid for bc i am a firm believer that bin would spoil his girl like mad) over his cock through his jeans while you’re both out with the members. there’s really only so much a man can take—which is why the second you get home, he’s throwing you over the arm of the couch and dragging your panties down. “bunny wanted to act like a slut all day, she’s gonna get fucked like one, yeah? look at this cunt, all messy and dripping f’ me. this is what you’ve wanted, huh? needy girl.” shoves your legs open and fingers you until you’re grinding on his hand and damn near sobbing. “bet this feels better than whatever you were doing to yourself earlier. dumb little bunny, trying to be a brat. all you gotta do is ask nicely and i’ll give you whatever you want, you know that.” doesn’t even bother to tell you when he wants you to move, just throws you around like a doll or grabs you with one arm and moves you around himself.

at one point he pulls you up from your hands and knees and wraps an arm around your throat to pin you to his broad chest. his thick cock has been practically splitting you open for god knows how long now—you’re so fucked out that you’ve stopped keeping track—and the couch cushions underneath you are soaked with your release. when bin reaches down to your clit again with his other hand, you whimper and feebly try to buck away from him. he just laughs and tightens his grip on you, cooing, “be a good little slut and take what i’m giving you, bunny” in your ear in a soft voice that’s a total contrast to the way he’s fucking ruining you. and how could you ever say no?

(this may or may not be motivated purely by changbin’s aaa performance outfit because good GOD why did he look even bigger and beefier than usual i want him so bad)

-🍒 anon

OHFMY GODF. . . do i even say anything at this point . . . what is there left to say holy fucking shit i am going insane this was so good ARE U SURE U DONT HAVE UR OWN BLOG BECAUSE IF NOT!!! GET ON IT!!!

omg omg omg i forgot who in skz said this but someone said that changbin becomes increasingly attractive while he’s eating AND HDHEHFDEDFFFD someone on twitter posted a video of him chowing down on some food and holy fuck the angle that video was taken from made his arms look so big and beefy, i replayed it for what felt like an hour.

BUT ! back on topic ! you would have to annoy changbin a lot for him to snap at you and fuck you this roughly because you’re his baby :( it’s okay if you’re a little spoiled :( he’ll always take care of you :(

but holy fuck, was his week horrible. he and chan got into a petty argument, their choreographer was up his ass about their upcoming award show performances, and all he wanted to do was fuck you slowly and sweetly like you deserved. but no! he was stuck in the practice room for another three hours and like a little minx, you sent him videos of you spreading your cunt open. if he wasn’t so pent up and tortured, he would scoff at how small the stretch of your fingers must have been compared to his thick cock.

you are IN FOR IT as soon as he reaches home. he couldn't care less about what you were doing. if you were on the phone—the call ended; if you were texting someone—power off; if you were cooking —no problem! he’s turning the stove off and shoving your hips aggressively against the counter, sliding your soaked, lace panties to the side after he’s bunched up your dress to your waist, and fucking his cock right into your greedy little cunt.

his hands would leave bruises on your hips with how firmly he would be gripping them and your ass would be so sore from his continuous smacks because changbin really couldn't control his temper after his shit show of a week.

and if fucking you in the kitchen wasn’t enough, he’ll fuck you in the living room, office, against your balcony window, in the laundry room, in the bedroom, and finally—the shower. your poor hole would be gaping by the end of his abuse, all spent and dribbling with his loads of cum :(

i can just imagine you’re all fucked out by the end of it and still, binnie grips your face and squeezes it harshly, forcing your lips to form a pathetic little pout :(

“see what happens? wanna try that again? sluts like you can’t go a second without being stuffed, huh?”

“do i need to do this every time, honey? do i have to teach you a lesson every day?”

“fussy girl. you knew i’d take care of you—still had to annoy me though, hm?”

[sethsclearwater]

request: “could you write a poly embry, paul, and reader oneshot where embry is feeling left out or insecure because he’s not as outgoing or popular as paul and doesn’t get why you love him too and reader comforts him?? i love the angst and drama 🤭 thanks for all u do for the twilight fandom 💕” and “could you do a poly!paulxreaderxembry smutty imagine where embry feels like he isn’t good enough for reader and she shows him how much she loves him and paul walks in at the end like ‘you’ve gotta be kidding me’ and reader is just a giggling mess and spends the rest of the day cuddling with her boys?”

warnings: smut, dom-ish!embry, sub-ish!reader (rip paul - no smut for him lmao)

word count: 2.14k

…

you and paul had spent the prior evening at a friend’s house party while your other imprinter, embry, was on patrol. the three of you had managed to work out your polyamorous relationship without too much of a hitch and all seemed to be going well. the three of you had moved into an apartment together and you loved that you were able to spend even more time with the two of them than you had before. 

the morning following your night out, you woke up to both boys’ sides of the bed to be empty which was quite unusual. as you woke yourself up, you opened your phone to see a text from paul letting you know that he was on patrol but nothing from embry.

“embry,” you called softly, figuring he must’ve just gotten up at some point during the night. sure enough, your other imprinter stepped into the room a moment later, looking a bit defeated to say the least.

you frowned when you saw his expression, “‘s wrong?” you murmured, crawling over to the edge of the bed to take his hands and tug him over to you. 

“‘s nothing.” he reassured, giving your hands a soft squeeze and leaning down to press a soft kiss to your head. 

you shook your head, “c’mere,” you encouraged, tugging him down so you could lay down with him. he obliged, laying back down in the bed and allowing you to curl into his side, “you gonna tell me what’s on your mind?” you asked softly, running your hand up and down his bare abdomen soothingly as you patiently waited for his response. 

of your two imprinters, embry was definitely the more quiet of the two, always needing a bit of extra coaxing to get him to talk to you about what was on his mind. 

he let out a heavy sigh, running his free hand through his hair as he squeezed you closer to him with his other hand, clearly trying to think of how to answer your question, “i just don’t know why you love me sometimes.” he confessed, voice barely above a whisper as he admitted his feelings to you.

you frowned at that, shifting a bit so you could get a better look at him, “why would you think that?” you asked softly, sliding your hand up to his face to gently cup at his jaw, rubbing soothing circles against the skin there as you allowed him a moment to think about his response.

he sighed again, “i don’t know,” he murmured, “i just see you with paul, and you two work so well together,” he said softly before adding, “and we do too but it’s not the same, you know? like he just always has something to bring you to or someone for you to meet and i never do.” 

“oh em,” you cooed, “i’m sorry.” you whispered, sliding your hand down to his bicep to hug him. embry quickly reciprocated the action, both of you holding each other close for a few breaths as you processed his confession to you. 

“you know that’s why i love you, right?” you asked softly after a moment, peeking up at him and offering him a small smile, “i love that you don’t go out as much as he does. paul would drive me nuts if it was just the two of us.” you giggled and embry let out a breathy laugh at your comment, “you’re great whenever i wanna stay in - paul is not.” you giggled again, “i think it’s perfect.” you added, smiling softly at him.

embry noticeably relaxed a bit at your reassurance, shoulders dropping as he hugged you closer to him, pressing his lips to your hair for a moment, “i love you.” he murmured and you giggled, pressing a soft kiss to his chest.

“i love you too em,” you reassured, peeking up at him when he loosened his grip on you, “have you talked to paul about it yet?” you asked softly and he nodded, letting out another soft sigh.

“he said i should talk to you about it.” he explained, threading his fingers through your hair soothingly.

you nodded, “well for once in his life he was right,” you said, both of you letting out breathy laughs at your comment, “you wanna do a movie day today?” you asked softly before adding, “it’s horrible outside.” 

he nodded, a small smile on his face, “that sounds nice.” he murmured, pausing for a moment before adding, “thank you.” 

you smiled, “anything for my big guy,” you giggled, rolling over so you were straddling his waist, “so you gonna let me show you how much i love you?” you asked softly, a teasing smile on your face as you sat up, running your fingers down his bare abdomen to his sweatpants, dancing your fingers along the thin waistband as you waited for his response. 

he let out a breathy laugh, nodding, “that’d be nice.” he whispered and you beamed at him, leaning down to press a soft kiss to his lips before sitting back up to pull your shirt up and toss it to the side.

lucky for you, paul had made quite a scene the night before after railing you in the bathroom after you two returned from the party, insisting that you went to bed in nothing but his t-shirt. embry also seemed pleased at this discovery, quickly sliding his hands up your sides before settling at your breasts where he quickly palmed them in his hands, taking your nipples between his fingers and teasingly rolling them.

you let out a low moan at the sensation, subconsciously squeezing your legs against embry, “such a pretty little thing,” embry murmured as you threw your head back, moaning as he rolled your nipples between his fingers, chuckling when he saw the way you were already dripping a combination of both yours and paul’s releases from the night before.

he slid his hands down to your waist, about to move to roll on top of you before you stopped him, sliding your hands down your sides to rest on top of his, “wanna ride you.” you whispered and he sucked in a breath, holding it for a moment before nodding.

you giggled at his reaction, knowing how much he loved having you ontop. you were generally what many would call a ‘pillow princess’ and rarely offered to ride either one of your imprinters. paul was generally the only one who could get you to do it, usually only coaxing you into it when he refused to let you cum any other way so your offer was more than a welcome surprise for embry.

“you want my fingers first?” embry asked softly, eyes softening at he looked up at you and patiently waited for your response.

you shook your head, lifting your hips to you could slide your fingers under the waistband of his sweatpants, gently tugging his cock up to free it from its restraints which had embry letting out a low groan. “already stretched out from last night,” you explained and embry chuckled softly, lifting his hips a bit to kick his sweatpants to the side so you could have better access to him.

“go slow then, okay? i don’t wanna hurt you.” he asked softly and you giggled, rolling your eyes as you lifted your hips to line him up with your entrance. you completely ignored embry’s instructions, immediately sinking all the down on his cock which had both of you letting out groans as you connected, “fuck-” embry groaned as you rolled your hips against his in an attempt to accommodate him. 

you let out a small whimper as you accommodated his length, always managing to forget that he had more girth than paul which regularly came to bite you in the ass in situations like these, “you have no idea how good you feel right now,” embry groaned, tightening his grip on your hips to hold you in place, “feels okay?” he asked breathlessly after a moment, clearly doing his best to not cum from you just sliding down his cock.

you nodded, letting out an exhale before responding, “you feel so good.” you murmured, “can you help me?” you asked softly and he nodded, already knowing what you meant as he lifted your hips up, helping you set a steady rhythm of rolling your hips against his, steadily sliding up and down his length. 

“fuck em-” you whimpered, placing your hands on his abdomen in an attempt to steady yourself as you felt yourself getting dizzy from all the pleasure coursing through your system. embry let out a breathy laugh, dropping his thumb to press against the sensitive bundle of nerves between your thighs, smiling to himself when you let out a loud moan as he started rubbing slow, tight circles against the nub.

“that’s my girl,” embry murmured, letting out a low groan when your walls fluttered around him at his words, “you gonna cum on my cock?” he asked, knowing how ridiculously paul had your head fucked up with asking to cum before coming undone on either of the boys. 

you nodded, “can i?” you whimpered, letting out a low whine when he thrust his hips up to meet yours, sending a sharp wave of pleasure up your spine.

“go ahead,” embry encouraged, “you feel so good babe,” he added, knowing how much you loved the positive praise from him, something paul rarely did with you. 

the lewd moans you were letting out usually would’ve had you concerned you’d be waking the neighbors up, but you couldn’t have cared less at this point. the only thing on your mind was cumming as quickly as you possibly could.

so when embry rolled your clit between his fingers, you were quick to fall right over the edge to your orgasm, throwing your head back as you let out a loud moan. the way you pulsed around embry had him cumming right after you, embry let out a loud groan, his grip on your hips tightening as he spilled into you. 

he slowed you hips, allowing you to fully sink down on his length as the two of you came down from your highs, “c’mere,” embry murmured before he pulled you down so you could lay down on him, “such a good girl,” he whispered, running his hands up and down your back soothingly. 

you took a couple deep breaths with him, both of you relaxing into eachother before the all too familiar sound of the third member of your trio pulled you back to reality, “look so fuckin hot riding him.” paul mused as he dried his hair off with one of the towels from your bathroom. he looked like he’d just gotten out of the shower, only wearing a pair of low hanging sweatpants as he dried himself off.

you giggled, smiling at him, “how long have you been home?” you asked softly, sliding your hand up embry’s chest until you found his free hand and quickly laced your fingers together.

paul smiled at you, “long enough to hear you offering to ride him.” he teased and embry let out a chuckle as you giggled, blushing as you realized he must’ve seen and/or heard most of your little rendezvous. 

“you staying here for the rest of the day?” you asked softly, reaching your other hand out to paul which he gladly took, tossing the towel to the side before getting in bed next to the two of you.

“yea,” he reassured, “you gonna let embry get you cleaned up while i make some breakfast?” he asked and you nodded, smiling at him before you leaned over to press a soft kiss to his lips. 

“okay i’ll be back in a minute.” he cooed, pressing one final kiss to your lips before getting up and heading into the kitchen. 

you turned your attention back to embry, smiling softly at him, “feeling better?” you asked softly, giggling when he let out a breathy laugh.

“much better.” 

[crushedsweets]

What about some lulu headcannons since you seem to like her? :)

oh anon u are spoiling me.... heres a little sketch of her college life. let me begin . . tw for general creepypasta things, abuse, bullying, death, etc

ok. so a lot lulus og stuff is gross obviously (although a majority of the og creepypastas have gross origins/creators). as a kid, i was pretty attached to her, but looking back , its just. ugghhghgh. which is why i want to try giving her her own horror type story while still following some of the core things that made her her. BEGONE WITH MIDDLE/HIGH SCHOOL KILLERS...

lulu is 24 but described as 'physically 14' which bugs me esp bc theres so much emphasis on her body being like an adult. and frankly i am not crazy about yet another 'little kid bullied/abused then goes crazy/demonic' story so i scrapped the bullshit ‘is 24 but looks 14 but is drawn like she’s 24!’. So I decided to just to make make her whole zalgo poisoning occur later in life. since its now set in university, a handful of things changed. mayhaps she knows jack ?

she grew up as a rich girl being put through several private schools growing up. she wasnt the smartest, she wasnt the most social, and while i think that the og story did this really fucking poorly, she did deal with harassment cuz she developed early. ranged from people calling her a slut for the same clothes as a thinner girl, to getting dress coded for no good reason, to rumors, etc. so, she's being bullied by her peers, though its moreso a ton of gossip rather than stuff in her og. overall school sucked for her

finally she goes to university. shes away from all those people, away from her helicopter parents, away from dress codes and loneliness. she tries SO hard to keep up the perfect daughter persona in public bc she knows shes walking on thin ice(having been punished for things out of her control all her life), with a wardrobe full of pencil skirts and button ups, but then she finally meets this guy named josh. but that shit gets seriously exhausting. and as many kids in her position do, she wants to Rebel .. she starts going to parties and whatnot w her edgy ass roommate. random garage shows, raves, generally reckless behavior etc. its not her fully her thing but she's there and having fun.

idk his name in the og story but there was that guy that led her on just to further abuse her. i changed him up and made him some guy in a frat that she met at a rando party. he was so sweet to her the first time they met, they talked for a long time at the party, he was cool overall and she never ever craved attention like this before - she never even GOT attention like this before, coming from an all girls school, so she clung. but he wasnt actually gonna date her, so he said some bullshit excuse about 'you know how greek life is, my frat wont let me date u unless u join this specific sorority!! soz' and he chose the worst, most clique-y sorority that has the most insane hazing ritual for girls that arent sought after. he thought there was no way she'd give it a shot and he could get her off his back. a dick move, but he didnt think she'd do it.

but, she does - and the hazing is fucking shit. the girls in the sorority are worse than the girls in highschool (and maybe in cliché fashion, one of her highschool bullies ended up in the sorority before her?). it starts off as things like 'oh you gotta buy your sorority sisters coffee for a week' to 'oh you have to be drunk/high throughout all your classes for a week' to completely deranged shit like branding yourself or slashing a professors tires. things nobody in their right mind would do, typically.

i havent decided exactly how exactly lulu hits the point where they think she's dead, but a group of sorority girls think she is. they panic, and in their panic cannot feel her pulse or hear breathing. she's completely unconscious, cold, and frankly on the way to death - so they take her to slenders forest and get to work

they bury her in a shallow grave, unaware of all the different demons residing in the forest watching one of the most gruesome displays of humanity. if youve watched girl from nowhere, theres a scene where nano gets buried alive by a group of her classmates then she wakes up . . imagine that.

im thinking, similar to the operator, zalgo can infect people as well . . maybe people on their death beds ? anyway, lulu's infected. long after the girls run off, lulu manages to dig herself out of the grave. shes wheezing, coughing, sobbing, its dark and cold and foggy, and she now has to come face to face with zalgo making some weird 'i saved you, i want something in return.' and there goes her eyes !!! rip lulu. maybe zalgo did it cuz hes a dick, maybe he actually needs human parts to seal the deal.

theres some more interaction but overall lulu doesnt have a ton of demon powers or anything. new wounds heal quickly, but her past ones will never will. she can be eerily quiet, popping in and out with fog, doesn't need food/water/sleep. . she does have kinda crazy strength(no agility or speed), but she's so mentally weak it does nothing for her

for a while she does just wander the forest in complete and utter mourning, until one of the proxies finds her and is like Oh Fuck that's not human. toby describes her as a zombie. so she's another job for them to handle

eventually they settle her in the hospital with ann.. the hospital is likely an area that experiences more fog, being closer to the lake perhaps, so it just makes sense to put her in an area she can see. it took a while for lulu to calm down bc she now has a pretty big fear around women , and the proxies have to CONSTANTLY come around and check in for a while, cuz she feels safer with them. maybe they tried putting her with jack but jack said absolutely the fuck not. bc lulus legitmately scary. she's constantly croaking, crying, wheezing, dripping blood everywhere she goes, etc.

she eventually gets along with ann, who thinks lulus cute and fun to chat with. i made a joke about them doing tiktok dances together but like. i could see it. maybe ann reminds lulu of her roommate, the only girl whos been completely nice to her ? dunno. (despite the roomie being the reason lulu got into the partying and stuff)

mmmmmm yeah. that is basically the entire rewrite .

i likely wont include her too much in the story just because the rewrite is so drastic+shes not all too popular but i used to feel very fondly towards her when i was 10 and i do think her character cconcept is super cool (the fog, the eye stuff, zalgo poisoning etc). theres just hella weird stuff but its a creepypasta from 2013 idk what we expect

[loopeyfluff]

Spiderman across the spiderverse thoughts and spoilers underneath read more. it's all just gushing, do not expect a proper review.

That. Was. Fucking. Insane. That was the best movie I’ve watched. Literally captivated from start to finish. WHAT AN EXPLOSIVE INTRODUCTION?! with gwen stacey and her drums? Such powerful animated movements, in fact ALL THE ACTION SCENES carried SUCH GOOD WEIGHT, made SUCH GOOD USE OF THEIR ENVIRONMENT, and were just generally so well choreographed! The first villain was just so visually stunning and animated, I LOVED his style. And the humour from the very start was just, on point. This entire movie WAS SOOOO FUNNY. IT WAS HILARIOUS! Hahaha the lego spiderman scene? How miguel was like, “you’re one of the best of us” XDDD. And omg the MAIN ANTOGNIST IS THE BAGEL GUY. I CANNOT. THATS SO HECKING FUNNY. HAHAHHWYWHAJABWHAJJAHAHAHAH.

Such a visually stunning movie man. Like the first one was amazing, but this somehow topped that. The ENVIRONMENTS AND WORLDS THAT WE EXPLORED WERE SOOOO BEAUTIFULLY CONSTRUCTED? Indian spiderman- just everything about him was hilarious- had such an amazing universe, just the layered upon layers of buildings and roads EVERYWHERE. omg HOBY??? I LOVE HOBY MAN. How earlier he was like, miles u gotta use ur palms too not just ur fingers, and then he was also very established to be an against capitalism and institution type man, AND OMG MY GUY AAAAAA HELPING MILES OUT!!!! WHEN NO ONE ELSE WAS DOING ANYTHING FOR HIM??? HOBY’S A REAL ONE GUYS I LOVE HIM.

MAYDAY WAS ADORABLE! Peter being such a doting father was so adorable and EVERYTHING. Like that sequence of him showing all the baby pictures to miles and gwen, and then when he told miles that he should HOLD THE BABY IT’LL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTTER!!!! And ofc it did XD THAT TRAIN FIGHT SCENE??? SO MANY MOVIES HAVE TRIED IT BEFORE, BUT THIS WAS THE ABSOLUTE SICKEST TRAIN FIGHT SCENE IVE EVER SEEN. Just the train BULLETING UPWARDS, and then the call back to the leap of faith?

AHHHH but also! So many wonderful computer screen background worthy shots within this film. I absolutely adored the way they kept having the spider people sit and hang upside down. It made so many visually stunning scenes! Like when they were going up the elevator,,, AND THEY WERE ALL UPSIDE DOWN!!! AARHEGEH SOOO COOOL!!!!

Oh man but that brief appearance of peni parker! SHE LOOKED SO TIRED :(!!! URGEGWHW WE GOT TO SEE SPIDERHAM AND SPIDERNOIR AT THE END BUT MAN I RLLY WISH I CUDA SEEN MORE OF THOSE GUYS WYHWHAHWUIAKjahauai!!1!1!?1!1!1 I was so happy when they finally appeared with gwens group of spider allies tho ; - ;!!!!!

Okay back to bagel guy, what a fun and hilarious opening and introduction? Hahaha trying to steal the atm machine and their whole banter, it was just so funny. Amazing introduction. I loved miles’ roommate too! I wish we got to see more of him haha.

Oh oh oh, I loved all of the impact frames in this movie, and also the speech bubbles and sound effects and other fun comic style things, but the glossary squares that kept appearing on screen??? AMAZING!!!! I would love to go through this movie again and just pause and read over everything! THE COLOURS WERE SOOOO GOOD IN THIS MOVIE??? THIS MOVIE REALLY STOOD OUT FOR ME IN IT’S PALETTES! SOME SCENES WERE JUST COMPOSED SO BEAUTIFULLY I JUST AYWHAHAHWUJAHAHAHAH!!!!

The plot twist at the end was so good. It was so well built up too, there were so many hints and what not but it only hit me when aaron showed up… the mom’s eyes being different, her not knowing who spiderman is,,, earlier when the screen got the WRONG DNA,,, and also just the different colour palette? So many good clues. I’m over here laughing at how anticlimactic the mom is taking the news, and then AARON SHOWS UP. And the revelation HIT ME LIKE A TRUCK MAN. IT WASN’T A JOKE.

can we talk about the amazing sound track and sound design for this movie??? I watched this in VMAX which is a cinema which had a larger screen and louder speakers, and wow, I WAS SOOO IMMERSED MAN. Not only does the music SLAP and match each new place so well, but it just adds so much to the viewing experience!!!!

This movie was an absolute masterpiece. Wow. Jesus. The first movie was like my favourite movie. But this somehow TOPPED THAT???? Insane.

[ghostly-clown]

Gving slashers hot chocolates (Headcannons)

cause they need something nice

Includes:

Michael Myers, Corey Cunningham, Thomas Hewitt, Jason Voorhees, Vincent and Bo Sinclair, Brahms Heelshire

.

Michael Myers

- Marshmallows and a heap of whipped cream

- Gotta make it sweet, cause I think everyone has agreed Michael likes his suger

- Whilst he waits for it to cool he'll just enjoy holding it and feeling the warmth from the cup

- Depending on how close y'all are he may take his whole mask off otherwise he would only lift it halfway

- But if he's grumpy he'll just turn around whenever he takes a sip

- Drinks the whole thing then eats the marshmallows

.

Corey Cunningham

- Dosnt need anything extra, he just appreciates the thought

- He would burn his tongue

- You would hand it to him, he's so happy he dosnt heed your warnings about how you just made it and it's hot

- But he'll still finish it (burning tongue or not)

- He LOVES hot chocolate (and just chocolate milk in general)

- But something about the fact you made it for him makes it taste extra special

- He's the person to get all soft and cuddly when drinking hot chocolate (u know the type)

.

Thomas Hewitt

- Cold texas day, Thomas has been out doing chores non-stop

- You and Luda May decide make hot chocolates for everyone

- They don't have any marshmallows or stuff to give it that exta sweet taste :(

- Thomas would just hold it for ages putting it close to his face trying to warm himself

- Can't imagine he got alot of sweet stuff growing up so hot chocolate is liquid gold for him

- He also goes kinda soft when drinking the stuff

- But he tries to resist it more

.

Jason Voorhees

- Cold night out at camp Jason has spent all day figuring out how to turn on the heating

- Make his hot chocolate in one of those oversized cups

- Extra whipped cream and 2 marshmallows on the side (he prefers them separate)

- His first instinct in to drink it as fast as possible to show he enjoys it

- Misses the whole point that you take your time to warm yourself up

- Sit him down get him a blanket, really set the scene

- He'll slow down and end up enjoying it 1000% more

.

Vincent and Bo Sinclair

- It dosnt get that cold in the wax room but he comes upstairs for a break and immediately gets hit by how cold it is outside

- He has a sweaer but he wasn't ready for l the cold so he is suffering

- You and Bo agree to make some hot chocolate for everyone

- Bo will slip in extra everything for himself and still have the audacity to call dibs on the last marshmallow

- He will drink it burn his mouth stop for a second before acting like nothing happened

- He is in pain but he also wants to finish his drink

- I don't think vincent would like marshmallows so he'll go for the extra whipped cream

- He actually takes his time and let's the drink cool a little

- He is in absolute heaven

- He's gonna start coming upstairs more during the cold just so you will make him hot chocolates

.

Brahms Heelshire

- Hea eats whipped cream straight out of the can so buy a second one

- He will constantly be refilling the drink with cream and marshmallows

- If it's chocolate powder he dose the thing where u put a heap at the bottom and don't stir it in so it becomes a lump of chocolate powder after ur done (i hope that makes sense?)

- Will pester you all day for more

- Constantly complaining that he's cold and feels sick and there's only 1 cure (the cure being hot chocolate)

- You show him how to make it so he can do it himself

- He burns himself by accident so now he's painfully hot whilst also having a cold

- What a marvel of a man

[elliespeach]

fantasizing about protective festival!ellie

warnings: 18+ explicit sexual descriptions, drug use, alcohol use, very Very brief choking kink, implied homophobia, mild possession, pet names

an: an offering until i finish part 2 of you belong to me i thought of this at work and knew she would be a festival girlie okokenjoy

she def tried to convince u to let her buy an airtag and stick it in ur outfit just in case she lost you in the crowd “you could just call me els” “what if ur phone dies” she pouted

she wore a simple button up that was unbuttoned with a sports bra underneath, her abs showing which made ur toes curl and loose basketball shorts. meanwhile u had to spend hours trying to find what to wear, always earning a “everything looks so good on you baby” as ellie watched u change for the 8th time

“absolutely not” she protested one of the more scandalous outfits u tried on, typically she wouldn’t care and actually liked ur skin showing to be able to flaunt you around “you know how these people are there, i don’t need you being ogled all night”

no bc watching her dance at the actual festival was intoxicating, grinding up behind you going with the beat of the music, grabbing ur ass and feeling u up in a way that felt hungry

also note she had a blunt resting in her mouth while she danced on u AHH

im also picturing her in a backwards worn out ball cap do with that what u will,, ok carrying on

u were only crossed, as when u suggested trying something a bit harder ellie def had something to say "idk babe u dont even take well to being too high sometimes" "fine but were doing shots!"

so u both were wasted, she guided ur hips with her hands to spin you around to face her the strobe lights started going crazy for the drop of the song that was playing

ellie hit the blunt while u watched not even questioning it bc she was so fucking fine while doing

she inhaled slightly and leaned in, grabbed ur neck face and blew the smoke into your mouth for u after u exhaled she wrapped her free arm around ur waist pulling u closer in

this time she kissed u and kissed u hard, still grinding to the music while doing so ofc

her hand wandering around ur back down to ur ass and when the kiss ended u continued dancing and ellie took a quick glance around

she saw a guy poking at his friend then pointing to u and her and immediately protective mode was activated

"cmon, i gotta go to the bathroom" grabbing ur hand and not even giving u the chance to respond "ellieeeeeeeee"

u guys were towards the back because "i dont wanna lose u in the crowd plus i think i would suffocate"

"els we just went to the bathroom" "i saw some guys staring at us, i didn't like the looks of it" she was very occasionally glancing in the direction where u guys came from, obviously worried

"lets go finish this and then go back" she suggested and brought u to the back of one of the food stands,, holding ur hand the entire time of course kinda too tight like she was white knuckling that shit

u guys passed it back and forth a few times before the redness of your perfect eyes, being crossed, and full on craving u overwhelmed her

"els!" u giggled as she sucked on ur exposed neck, marking every single square inch she possibly could before moving to ur jaw

ellie being ellie she lightly bit ur earlobe sending shockwaves thru u n feeling the surge of confidence ((and bc shes a cocky shit)) she goes "let those try guys come near you, you're mine"

immediate butterflies. immediate pulsing in ur pussy like oh my GOD and being so horrendously down bad u say "i'm yours"

instinctively u stretched ur arms over her shoulders and as soon as u started to move ur hands thru her hair in pleasure she threw the remaining blunt to the ground and literally picked u up

like hoisted u up so that ur legs were around her waist, one of her hands placed itself on ur back the other firmly on ur ass

this was all mid kiss btw

she spun around and crashed ur back into the back of the food stand and bc shes so strong she could hold you there basically by holding herself so close to you

she reached a hand down feeling ur pussy thru the very light shorts u had on "no underwear, huh baby?" all u could do was shake ur head the feeling of her touching u was overwhelming to say the least "and already so wet, tsk tsk"

u blushed but thank god it was dark bc she wouldve teased u about it and u wanted so badly for her to just kiss u again u leaned in slightly as if asking permission

"and so needy" "please, els" "what was that?" she paused her fingers on ur core and u whined "words princess, i need words"

sigh, anyway

leaving the festival she knew u were drained and let u piggy back most of the way to the car, she drove back home letting u sleep peacefully in the passenger seat

when u guys got back home she was fully prepared to carry u in but u woke up

but u were way to tired to get ready for bed so she undressed u, showered u, and put u in one of her tee shirts and ultimately put u to bed only to be interrupted by her coming to cuddle only a short time later