#chronic pain rain

[talkethtothehandeth]

Raise your hand if you have also been personally victimized by the barometric pressure changes 🥲

[raining-its-pouring]

Living.

[ididit-allofit-foryou]

sometimes my brain is like 'you're not Actually That Disabled. you're fineeee' & then. i remember. i literally can only shower once a week bc i don't have energy to do it more than that. even though i DESPERATELY want to shower every day. and i only change clothes when i shower and wear the same clothes Every Day between showers bc even changing clothes takes energy i Do Not Have. even though i Like wearing different clothes despite not ever leaving the house. (which is Another Thing in itself, never leaving the house.) so like. Fuck imposter syndrome. it Really Is That Bad.

[cupcakes-n-rainbows]

Being young and disabled really, really sucks sometimes.

It’s summer, a glorious time where classes don’t exist. Summers are supposed to be a time for fun. I should be swimming, suntanning, living it up in the painfully short time between graduating one grade and moving onto the next. These months are fabled, mythical, a brief and revered break from the boredom and rigor of schooling. 

Instead, I sit in the dim cold of my kitchen, tethered to a bright green block of buzzing machinery by the tubing connected to the nebulizer mouthpiece held between my teeth. I’m on my fourth breathing treatment of the day. I have two more to go. I start high school this year. I haven’t left the house in a week.

I can’t help but feel like this isn’t how it should go. I should be in a swimsuit on the beach, not crafting increasingly complicated cocktails of nebulized medications to get me through the simple act of breathing. I should be hanging out with my friends, laughing and talking and trying new Starbucks drinks, not chained to my house, my kitchen, my veritable pharmacy of medications and the few foods I can eat. 

It’s like I’ve been robbed, and not just of my summer. Of my childhood. Of my teenage years. Lately, I’ve been scared for the all too quick coming of adulthood too.

I’m missing out. I’m being left behind. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to catch up.

This isn’t how it should be, and yet, I have no choice.

I hope it gets better. I really do.

[stars-and-branches]

My joints the minute it starts raining

[no-demons-in-wonderland]

Take a moment to listen to the rain, you're exhausted from fighting; ableism, racism, classism, homophobia, transphobia, biphobia, pro lifers, chronic illness, financial disparity and much more.



[cirrus-ghoulette]

Rain with hypermobility where he uses braces to keep his knees and elbows from popping out.

Dew with tics where he throws his head and shakes it, whistles, and repeats words other people have said (he's not a big swear-ticcer, but he does occasionally shout swears just so he can brush it off as a tic, even though it wasn't.)

Aether with chronic migraines, usually caused by the high energy of his bandmates. He has lightblocking curtains over his bunk in the tour bus and the pack know to keep quiet if they realise he's gone back there.

Mountain with chronic back pain, most likely brought on by his height. They invest in a new chair for him to sit in at his kit with more support than the stool he was on before.

Swiss with insomnia, never able to sleep after a ritual, until he crashes when they have two days in a row off. He sleeps for the entirety of the two days.

Cirrus with joint pain in her hands and wrists that means she sometimes fumbles her Mummy Dust solo due to the cramped way she has to hold her hand on the keytar. As a perfectionist, she never forgives herself for it any time it happens.

Cumulus with chronic stomach aches, performing with one heatpad on her back and one on her stomach, covered by her waistcoat. Dipping backstage and getting Sunshine to take over her parts when her nausea gets too much.

Sunshine with ADHD that she just can't control. At all. Human medication doesn't even skim the surface of how much it affects her. She's like Swiss, she'll be super high energy for days on end, and then suddenly crash.

[nyaskitten]

im never gonna take 'lloyd is 18' motherfuckers seriously girl it has been at LEAST 3 -5 years since the Merge, an undisclosed amount of time between Crystalized and the Merge, oh and also 14 OTHER SEASONS BEFORE CRYSTALIZED. do you want me to believe that he was like 15 when the Merge happened ??? do you really ???

[hayakawapartner]

aki with a s/o with chronic pain . . .

!!! this post is sfw, but minors/ageless blogs dni with this post/blog !!!

notes: gn!disabled!reader, this is self indulgent i tried to make this fitting for more general chronic pain! reader might come across as ehlers danlos-coded (is that a thing?? weird thing for me to type)

aki is already so sweet and caring with you, of course he would be helpful when your chronic pain flares up.

he notices that you’re moving a bit slower, taking shorter steps, taking a longer time to get up from your seat… and he’s immediately there to help

VERY quick to ask what you need, but he also tries to offer your usual solutions

“where does it hurt? do you need a heating pad? painkillers? tiger balm? do you want me to run a warm bath?”

if you have fluctuating mobility/occasionally use a mobility aid, he does his best to keep everything in a convenient spot for you. crutches near the bed so you can slide your arms in and get up with a bit more ease, rollator in a place where you don’t trip but it’s easy to access…

he was initially Overly Careful with you so he didn’t aggravate your pain further, but as he grows used to your needs, he’s still careful but he’s not scared of breaking you like he used to be

kisses the back of your neck while gently massaging your sore joints/muscles, murmuring soft “i love you”s and “you’re gonna be okay”s while he’s rubbing tiger balm onto your sorest spots

if he hears your joints pop he gets really nervous until you specify if it was a good/bad pop

if a spot is too sore, he won’t touch it in case he hurts you even more.

and if you just Can’t get out of bed for the day? he calls off from work to take care of you. brings you comfort food, helps you to the bathroom when you need it, makes sure you’re hydrated and taking your meds…

SPEAKING OF MEDS. this man is so good at reminding you

“did you forget to take your meds? maybe you should take them now, love. it’ll help you feel less sore.”

he’s very careful to make sure he doesn’t shame you for forgetting meds, for needing help, for being in pain. he just does whatever he can to make sure you’re okay and empathises with your complaints about your aches.

while he hates seeing you in pain during a flare-up, he becomes extra doting just to make sure your needs are met. cooks your fav comfort meal, makes sure all your pillows are soft and arranged to keep you comfy, refills your water bottle whenever it’s almost empty, etc.

he’s just so loving… aaauuuu

[moldycantaloupe]

Mushy May Day 10

Quiet Nights

Pairing; Swiss/Rain

Cw; drug use (weed) and light talk on chronic pain. this one is a little more angsty!

thank you to @forlorn-crows for the prompts!

Rain stalked the halls on stiff legs, their footsteps echoing against the walls of the abbey. They spent the better part of an hour tossing in their bed, sleep refusing to give in. There was no real reason for their insomnia to be acting up; they didn’t have caffeine too late, they weren’t doing anything laborious (couldn’t anyway), they had their dinner on time, and yet.

With nothing better to do in the late night, they tiptoed their way to the roof access, climbing the ladder that was definitely against some form of safety code and pushed the trapdoor open. They were met with a sky full of clouds that covered the stars, but left enough room for the moon to shine. They groaned; full moon. Of course.

“Howdy, cowboy.” They snapped their head towards the end of the roof and saw the local multi ghoul perched with one leg dangling, the other tucked under his chin. They lifted themselves fully up onto the roof and shut the door, crawling over to him. He was grinning, if not a bit sleepily, at the water ghoul.

“Howdy yourself.” They sat criss cross next to him and stared back out to the sky. “Why are you up late?”

“I could ask you the same question.” Swiss lifted a joint to his mouth and breathed in. Rain watched him out of the corner of their eyes and shrugged.

“Full moon.” They lazily pointed towards the sky, and Swiss seemed to actually take it into consideration as he looked up with them.

“Guess that’s my excuse, too.” Swiss breathed out, and Rain crinkled their nose against the smell of the smoke. He offered them the joint and they shook their head.

That was where the conversation ended. Swiss smoked the rest of his joint and Rain stared out into the cloudy dark sky, watching as the clouds tried to cover up her beauty only for her to emerge once more. It was beautiful; poetic, even.

They blinked when Swiss took in a big inhale and turned towards him, their eyes a little heavier than before but nowhere near tired. Relaxed.

“You gonna go to the lake, fishy?” Swiss asked, his tone somewhere between sincere and teasing. He wiggled his fingers in their face and they giggled at him, pushing the digits away with their own hand.

“Might as well.” They sighed. “Probably why I’ve been hurting more today.”

Swiss’ grin faltered and his eyes were furrowed, concern laced in his features. “Did you tell anyone?”

They shook their head and looked back up at the sky to avoid his gaze.

“Why didn’t you tell anyone? We could’ve helped.” Swiss sounded hurt. They cringed at the idea.

“I know.” They mumbled. “But everyone’s been busy, and,” they huffed out a short sigh, “I can take care of myself.”

Swiss was quiet for a beat, before muttering, “I know.”

Their gaze shifted to their lap and found themselves absentmindedly picking at their fingers. They stopped.

“Would you like to come with me to the lake?” They offered. “We don’t have to talk, you can just… be there. With me- near me.”

They glanced up, their head still bowed, and Swiss was smiling so sweetly at them.

“I would love to, fishy.”

They eventually headed back down to the abbey, Swiss first before Rain followed. He held their hand in a firm grasp as they walked towards the lake, and Rain could feel him trying to pump what little quintessence he had into their joints on the walk over. They nearly ripped their clothes off once at the lake, the pull from both the moon and water becoming unbearable in their lithe frame as they jumped in. They could hear Swiss laugh earnestly as they most definitely splashed water onto him, but with the water finally surrounding their body, they couldn’t find it in themselves to care.

And just like they promised, there were no conversations held for the rest of the night. Swiss stayed at the dock with his sleep pants rolled to his knees and his feet dangling in the water. They came by throughout the rest of the night to tease their touch on his feet, making him kick out in shock and amusement, or to just say I’m here. He never did fall asleep during a full moon, and they both would be excused from the chores and rehearsals the next day as they huddled together in one of their beds, bone tired from her constant pull and Rain’s exertion.

[fishgeraldthealmostincel]

hits your favorite character with my disability beam

[ididit-allofit-foryou]

a vent piece about living with chronic illness

[cupcakes-n-rainbows]

Using mobility aids is not "setting myself up to fail in my own fantasy." I am not giving in or giving up.

When I say I don't ever see myself without my wheelchair, I'm not giving up. I'm looking up at the future with sparkles in my eyes, watching it all unfold on the movie screen in my mind. And in that future? I'm disabled. I use a wheelchair. I have paralysis. I need help. And in that future? It's beautiful and it's amazing and it's fun, and it isn't hampered or dampened or lessened in worth by four wheels instead of two feet. It's just my future. Yes, it's different than that of an able-bodied person, but everyone's future is different, wheels or not. The help I need and my form of mobility doesn't make my life or my future any less wonderful.

Please, hear me and know me and understand me. Please, listen and truly take it to heart when I tell you that this is my future and this is my life. Not the hope you had for me when I was seven or how I danced when I was ten. That naive child left years ago, locked somewhere within the depths of my mind. She won't be back. I'm not her anymore. I'm not the same as I was, and I never will be.

My story isn't a tragedy. I'm not "too young". I'm not "too smart". I'm not throwing away my "bright future". This is my bright future. This is me, through and through and up and down, forwards and backwards and right and wrong.

Please. Let me live on my wheels rather than die on my feet. It's all I ask.

[eeveekitti]

WC/RW DAY 3: HUNTER

this is redsong, the deputy of drizzleclan! she is actually a purebred somali, and was a kittypet [named hunter] before being drawn to the wild by a strange starry-furred cat...

being a purebred, she has some health complications that result in chronic pain

[ik its day 4 i promise i'm doing gourm later]

[minecraftbookshelf]

To Walk a Mile In Each Others Shoes: Dessert Duo

Summary: The soulbonds have consequences, and for some they are more welcome than others. Scar & Grian Edition

Characters: GoodTimesWithScar & Grian

Word Count: 379

General Note: I'm posting these as separate one-shot style posts for each soulbond pair. They are all written but I have them queued up and spaced out. All posted will be on this blog under the tag "to walk a mile in each others shoes," linked at the bottom of the other posted ones, and also on my AO3, which is linked on my pinned post.

This one uses some concepts from Everen's Double Life Animatic, which if you somehow haven't seen yet, you absolutely should, I'll link it in the notes.

-

Scar is expecting the feathers.

He saw Tango, he saw BigB, he knows what is going to happen. The consequences of binding two Players together at the soul.

He is expecting the feathers.

He is not expecting the purple tint that settles over the world, the way the world border shifts and swirls and he can now see the coding knit into it to keep them all inside. He is not expecting to be able to see the soulbonds. Thin lines trailing between them all, connecting them at their hearts, at their hands, at their throats.

(He tries not to think too much about what it means that he can see the other end of his own bond, wrapped around Grian's neck like a strangling vine, or what it means that the only other two who wear the threads that way are Scott and Cleo, who left their partners.)

He thinks Grian's thread loosens a bit towards the end, becomes less like a chokehold and more like a scarf.

As he falls from his horse to the ground he doesn't know what hurts more. The echo of a sonic boom in his chest, or the way the thread around his finger fades away before everything goes black.

-

Grian doesn't know what he expects to get from Scar and he hates that he doesn't know. He is on tenterhooks waiting, from the moment the soulbond was fully realized and acknowledged by them both and the bleed-through began.

Because if Scar is anything it is predictably unpredictable and while usually Grian finds it fascinating right now he hates it. He hates the suspense. He hates the uncertainty. He hates the sensation of being trapped by the inevitable.

It's almost a relief when he cuts his lip on a tooth that wasn't that sharp the night before. Grian can deal with a few Vex traits, watered down two degrees, filtered through a soulbond with a changeling. Scar is growing feathers, which means he got the avian traits and. Grian can deal. This is okay. This is manageable. This won't need damage control.

(And Scar throws cookies at him "for your secret soulmate" and his eyes linger on Grian's neck and the supposed-to-be-invisible thread of the bond burns against his code.)

-

Team Ranchers || Team Box || Dessert Duo || The Boat Boys || The Homewreckers || Bad Math || Tilly Death Do Us Part

[rottenteethkids]

[knee gives out and crackles as it goes down] You: Oh my god! Are you okay?? Me: Yeah, it's just about to rain.