#do i have to get my fucking grandpa to translate it for me ………

[aahsoka]

could the vincenzo translators be so kind as to translate the fucking italian i dont speak that either

[currently-becoming-potatoes]

List of words for the computer:

LONG POST- more under the cut

STANFORD- Pulls up a file on Stanford Pines, written by an unknown scientist. It discusses his extra finger and praises his intelligence, as well as calling him the “next evolution in the human species”.

BILL CIPHER- Takes you to the Wikipedia page for the Eye of Providence. Also took me to a Sesame Street video about a Jazzy Triangle and a Square. Not sure what prompted the change.

STANLEY PINES: Takes you to a list of EBay listings for brass knuckles.

FIDDLEFORD: Takes you to the music video for Cotton Eye Joe by Rednex.

SHERMIE: Nothing. I sure do wish we got some lore about Grandpa Pines.

GRAVITY FALLS: The text on the computer reads “never heard of it” and the red light on the bottom turns green.

ALEX HIRSCH: Leads to Google Images for “flannel”. Huh.

WEIRDMAGEDDON: Pulls up an article from the Gravity Falls Gossiper about how nothing happened at all and there was no apocalypse.

DISNEY: Screen reads “rat.gif censored for your protection”

SOOS: Leads to a page of writing from Soos himself, referencing many things (including Tad Strange being gay and madly in love with Woodpecker Guy. Love wins!!!)

DIPPER: Leads to a creepy yellow parchment with a message from Bill Cipher himself trying to trick Dipper into blinding himself by staring at the sun for 13 hours straight! Silly! (Also if you keep clicking on it, the page gets darker and blurrier until it implies we've gone blind)

MABEL: Causes stickers to appear on every available surface. Clicking it enough times leads to message “lab now fully Mabelized”.

WENDY: Leads to a note from Wendy that mentions a way to ward off evil triangles written in the bottom corner of the book.

GIDEON: Makes a web recording of Gideon scatting play. It ends with “I love you forever Mabel”. Please shut the fuck up you little creep.

TAD STRANGE: Plays a video of bread with smooth jazz in the background.

TOBY DETERMINED: Leads to a Google search for a restraining order. Holyyyyy shittttttt

WHO ARE YOU: “I could ask you the same question”

SEASON 3: “Season Two”. I guess that’s that lol

This was about all I could find. Please reblog with anything else you can discover! Thank you, fellow Gravity Falls enjoyers!

And make sure to give some love to all the wonderful folks down in the comments! Many of these answers and tips come from what they've found. I can't list everyone, unfortunately- I didn't expect this post to get popular- but, to everyone who's helped out, THANK YOU.

FURTHER EDITS:

BLIND EYE: Pulls up an optometrist’s eye exam. Each line reads “WKHBOOVHH”. Too lazy to translate atm.

PIÑATA: Bill Cipher getting beaten to death /hj

MASON: A note from Dipper listing several anagrams of Gravity Falls characters’ names. You can check in the comments for the answers.

AXOLOTL: “You ask alotl questions”. Thanks for the pun, Alex, but I’m kind of losing my mind rn

MYSTERY SHACK: Leads to a Google search for Confusion Hill, the real-life Mystery Shack!

MYSTERY: “?”

MONSTER: Leads to several YouTube videos for “There’s a Monster at the End of this Book.”

VALLIS CINERIS: Leads to an analog-horror-esque video of Baby Bill and his parents, who have been blotted out by static, and a voice repeating “WHY DID YOU DO IT” over and over again until you stop the video.

PORTAL: “Portal.exe has been deleted. I bet you could build a new one.”

GIFFANY: You need to put it in multiple times. Several warnings about breaching firewall, followed by a message from GIFFANY saying “SOOS! I still love you!” or smth like that, and then GIFFANY herself briefly appearing onscreen. Trying again after that summons her more. Also lets you download some ZIP files.

DORITO: Summons an image of a spinning Dorito, followed by the most cursed image of Bill Cipher I have ever seen.

GOD: A short video of an axolotl in a tank with a Bill Cipher statue plays. This is Alex’s axolotl, shown in the Book of Bill countdown.

REALITY: “Is an illusion”

FILBRICK: “I’m not impressed”

CARYN: “I knew you were gonna write that”

GLASS SHARD BEACH: Leads to an image of the New Jersey Hell Hole.

ANY CUSS WORD: Pulls up a paper reading “NOT S&P APPROVED. WASH YOUR MOUTH OUT WITH SOAP” with an image of soap below.

MATPAT: Leads to a video of MatPat next to a conspiracy board, holding the Book of Bill. He tells us we’re on our own.

BABBA: Plays an audio recording of Dipper singing BABBA. Not Disco Girl, a different song.

CRAZ: Leads to the Jem and the Holograms theme.

XYLER: See above.

AD ASTRA PER ASPERA: Shows us two new journal pages from Ford and Mabel, studying the Cipher statue. They’re definitely worth the read, I teared up looking at them.

ANSWER: “Question”

QUESTION: “Answer”

SEASON ONE: “Season -1: Antigravity Falls”

SEASON TWO: “Season 1” …maybe scratch what I said about Season 3. Or don’t. Things are starting to damage my brain.

CURSED (got from @slimslamflimflam decoding the candle! Thanks!): Shows two pages talking about the dangers of drawing triangles, with the bottom of the second page showing several drawings of Bill and the words “HE IS COMING, RUN”

THE UNIVERSE: “Hologram”

RIZZ: “Life privileges revoked. Now releasing poison gas.” This response is repeated if you type in SKIBIDI or FORTNITE.

BABY: Shows an ultrasound of a fetus Bill Cipher, captioned “Look at what’s growing inside you! See you in nine months, papa!”

JOURNAL 3: “The Journal for Me”

PACIFICA: Leads to a note from Pacifica calling Bill Cipher “ick” and telling us to follow her on social media under “Platinum Paz”

PLATINUM PAZ: Pulls up an image of Northwest Manor with the llama symbol overlaid and a “NW” logo beneath. There's also a short story beneath!

LOVE: Leads to an audiobook of “The Love Triangle”. Need to read later.

BLENDIN: “The time agent lost and presumed incompetent”. Uh…?

SCARY: Leads to another audiobook of a cheesy Goosebumps-esque horror novel written by Bill himself, apparently.

DIVORCE: Shows you the logo of the bar Bill went to after his fight with Ford… Billford bitter exes confirmed

ROBBIE: Leads to the cringiest messages ever. He’s such a failure I love him

CONSPIRACY: Leads to a video of a man losing his mind over the countdown counting up. I feel so seen. (I have been informed that his name is Charlie Day, he's an actor from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia and that one meme, he had a quote on the back of the Book of Bill, thanks to everyone who explained that to me, I'm sorry, I'm uncultured)

RAT: “Thurburt’s number?”

BLANCHIN: Leads to a YouTube video on how to blanch vegetables.

TJ ECKLEBURG: “Never mention that name again.”

NOTHING: “Something”

SOMETHING: “Nothing”

BURNSIDE: “Burned inside.” Well… at least we know what happened…

WADDLES: Leads to the pig placement network!

THERAPRISM: Pulls up a sign from the theraprism regarding an emergency situation. The code reads "THE OLD ONE".

SHAPE: Pulls up an article on Plato, triangles, and Ancient Greece. This article is presumably written by Bill.

LLIB and BILL: THIS leads to the Sesame Street video every time.

WEIRD: Shows a video of a frightened Weird Al panicking about being trapped in a computer. Sorry, man...

CLONE: Pulls up an image of Paper Jam Dipper, a warning about not getting him too close to liquids, and an option to print.

TRIANGLE: ")" or "Tri harder."

THEYLLSEE: "Is seeing believing?"

DEER TEETH: "For you, kid!"

LIFE: "Life: 72% complete. Now loading: death."

DEATH: "Life's goth cousin."

PINES: "A good family tree."

OWL TROWEL: A slab of hieroglyphs, translating to an ancient ad for an owl trowel.

SCALENE: "Life form not found." EUCLID has the same outcome.

WELL WELL WELL BEING: Some assorted notes from Bill's Theraprism file. These include his greatest love and fear, his art therapy notes, and notes on his phobias. Three clicks is required to read them all.

BOO BERRY: Offers a poem on the meaning of life! Wow! I feel so enlightened!

LOVE YA BRO: Shows us a doodle from Stan of one of his and Ford's Sea Grunks adventures, and another code on the back. It translates to "Kings of New Jersey." I've been told it lets you download the code as a font.

SORRY: Reveals the repaired Backupsmore photo, with a note from Fiddleford about his and Ford's growing friendship. Fiddauthor fans, we are eating well tonight!

HORROR: Pulls up an image and report on The Always Garden, which is essentially a cheap Italian restaurant hidden in the backrooms.

HOLOGRAM: "Universe."

NAITSUAF: Pulls up a page that looks like it would be from the Book of Bill, in which Bill tries to convince us to sell us his soul. Clicking "ARE YOU READY?" pulls up a contract where we can sell our soul to Bill (with an alarming amount of coded fine print. Will need to translate later). You can print this document out, back out, or sign it right there on the web. Hitting "SIGN" causes the words "PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS WITH YOU!" to appear, and the document to close. In other words, I no longer have a soul.

IMSTILLONYOURMIND: Plays a recording of the ocean, with Stan faintly talking in the background. Poor Ford ain't quite over the divorce yet...

HOTXOLOTL: Pulls up a "MOST WANTED" doc on the henchmaniacs.

SEVENEYES: Pulls up a faded polaroid of The Oracle with text on the back that reads "LEAVE HIM. Escape to dimension *blurred out*. It's against the rules but it's the only reality where you'll be safe from him." The code at the bottom (once again decoded by the powerhouse that is @slimslamflimflam) reads "Set a course for Dimension: R34LITY." Is another Cipher Hunt in the makes? Only time will tell, hehehe.

JUST FIT IN: Plays an old commercial with a few moments of speech in the glitches at the end.

EVEN HIS LIES ARE LIES: Shows a transcript from a therapy session at the Theraprism. Bill discusses his relationship with Ford and cuts off the session when someone brings up his parents.

NOT A PHASE: Shows a Google search for "black hair dye stained an entire bathroom."

PAPER IS BOOK SKIN: Instantly downloads a page of fleshy pink paper with the word "ENJOY" written on it!

SHAVE YOUR GRANDMA: Pulls up a few more pages about the human life cycle.

LIES: Pulls up an image of "The Game of Lies" board game, with a long stretch of text from (I assume) Bill, ending with "LIE UNTIL YOU ARE NOT LYING ANYMORE." Someone has some issues...

SAY BAAAA: Pulls up a neat little rhyme about being Bill Cipher's obedient flock of sheep. The code at the end translates to "Black Sheep."

ONE EYED KING: Plays a video of a hypnotist's spiral, with Bill proclaiming "YOU WANT TO PLEDGE YOUR SOUL TO BILL CIPHER" in the background. There is also morse code that translates to "NAITSUAF", leading to a previous discovery- the soul contract.

TANTRUM: Pulls up a transcript of a spat between Bill and Time Baby.

TITANS BLOOD: "HOOT HOOT! Password please!"

CURSE WITTEBANE: Pulls up an image of a Bill Cipher ouija board.

FORDTRAMARINE: Pulls up several rejected files from Ford trying to convince us Fordtramarine exists.

SUCK IT MERLIN: Pulls up a tapestry of Bill riding a unicorn. The code at the top reads "DAY MARE VS NIGHTMARE."

HEY NERD: Plays a commercial advertising things such as a Bill Cipher calendar, the Scrubba-Bill, a severed hand, and the entire Cygnus-XIII galaxy. Half of the image can be found in the Book of Bill.

DESTRUCTION IS THE FORM OF CREATION: Pulls up a frantic page of notes from post-portal-shit Fiddleford. A sticky note at the bottom has a code that reads "Unreality."

RUBBERHOSE: Plays "The World is Small Ever After for All."

IRREGULAR: Shows us Bill's mugshot in color. The code below reads "No prison or attention span can hold him."

UNREALITY: Offers a guide by Bill on how to become immortal.

GUN: "Oh yes oh yes oh yes they both."

ABUELITA: Leads to a video on vacuuming the walls.

YES: "What's McGucket's favorite soda?"

NO: "Your loss..."

REPEATEDLY CLICKING STAN: This stuff deserves a section of its own, away from the OG Stan stuff. It takes you through several Ebay listings on various Stan-ish items until you get to a page written by Bill about Stan's secret shames. "Ex-wives" further confirms our theory on Stan and Eda's relationship, as well as revealing many other bits of lore. "Fears" is somewhat goofy to be honest. "Secret Shames" reveals that Stan is a fanfiction writer and that his mother is the only member of his family who truly loves him outside of Ford and the kids. "Unreported Crimes" is somewhat goofy as well. "Failed Products" basically confirms that Stan is that world's Alex. "Lowest Moments" is genuinely depressing, and "Darkest Thought". Well. I'm not spoiling it lol. And the bit on "How He Beat Me" causes Bill to get more and more frantic/angry the more you click it! Comedy GOLD!

DIPPY FRESH: Leads to a Reddit post of the Burger King Kids Club.

MEOW: Leads to a TikTok of a man playing the Gravity Falls theme on that cap keyboard.

HELP ME: Pulls up another video of Alex's axolotl and the tiny statue. Rip Bill ig :/

R34LITY: Pulls up several photos of the henchmaniacs in live-action, captioned "They found a new home."

JOURNAL 1: "The journal of fun."

JOURNAL 2: "The journal for you."

FBI: "Your webcam is on. We are watching."

BURNED INSIDE: Shows an image of a charred Oregon Parks badge and nametag on the ground.

HECTORING: Plays a silly little country song!

OROBOROUS: Pulls up two journal pages about Fiddleford buying Ford an axolotl to keep him company, and Bill subsequently telling Ford to get rid of him. There's also some code on the first page that reads "CHONKY BOY." Ford, you wonderful dork.

[libraryraccoon]

A Penguin And The Angel Of Death

Gift for : @deadghosy

Gender : Penguin

Pronouns : They/Them

Message of Raccoon : I just really wanted to write Azrael with Penguin!Reader, so I try.

TW : bad english, english isn't my first language.

How you met Azrael is a mystery for everyone.

Azrael had heard about Heaven and Hell fighting over a penguin, and he decided to go check it out.

"So you're the famous Penguin." -Azrael, seeing you for the first time.

Friendship. Instantly.

He was your platonic soulmate.

I can see Azrael taking you flying with him. Imagine being a normal angel or demon, looking up and seeing the angel of death flying, holding a penguin in his arms.

The day of the trial, you and Azrael were watching everything from the sidelines, eating popcorn.

“Do you think they know you’re going to stay with me ?” -Azrael, watching the scene while eating popcorn, amused.

You made a penguin noise that can be translates as "Sshh, this is starting to get interesting." -Penguin!Reader, watching the scene like a TV novela.

Azrael speaks penguin. Don't ask how, he just do it.

"Guardship returns to.." Sera paused, either in disbelief or to be dramatic. “Azrael ?!” Certainly the first.

“Yo bitch.”

They looked at him as if they were seeing him for the first time- they hadn't even noticed him.

"WHAT ?! BUT HE DON'T EVEN KNOW THEM !" -Lute.

You worried for a second for Azrael's safety before remembering that he was the Angel of Death and that he was in no danger.

Lucifer looks at his brother, feeling betrayed that he is taking one of his children away from him.

Azrael walked out of the room with you in his arms, happy of the trial he saw today.

Azrael is like your cool dad who takes you everywhere with him and takes you wherever you want.

Azrael can go to Heaven, Hell or even Earth just with a snap of his fingers, say your destination and he'll take you there with no problem.

You often go to Hell and Heaven because you are attached to the people that are there.

Azrael only leaves you alone with Lucifer or Emily.

Lucifer is basically your uncle who babysits you all the time.

You have met Big G and the other archangels. I don't make the rules, as soon as Azrael won your guardship, he introduced you to the rest of the family.

You are the archangels' favorite nephew and Big G's favorite grandchild.

I just know that you and Big G spent hours on grandpa-grandchild outings. You go to the beach, get ice cream, play jokes on others... until Azrael comes to pick you up.

I headcanon that you help Gabriel in his work as a messenger.

It was you who passed the message of Sir Pentious being in Heaven to Charlie, telling her that redemption was possible.

It was your first message, Gabriel and Azrael were very proud of you after you managed to successfully transmit it.

They had a party to celebrate it.

No one can fuck with you.

Literally, you have Azrael, Big G and all the archangels on your side. Upsetting you/being on your bad side is a death sentence.

Lute and Adam are so disgusted that Azrael stole you - like you can feel their jealousy at 3000km/h.

Azrael just smiled at them before calling you “his son/daughter/child” in front of them just to piss them off.

And it works.

I can see Alastor trying to make a deal with Azrael for you to stay at the Hotel, Azrael just looks at him like "Really now ?"

Needless to say, it never worked and if it wasn't for you, he would have already killed the deer demon.

The angels find it adorable that the fearsome angel of death is walking around with a little Penguin, it's just too cute for them.

Family dinners are ✨️beautiful✨️

Beautiful in the sense that it's chaotic and it's never bored.

Usually family dinners are you, Big G, Azrael, Lucifer, Charlie, and the other archangels.

But one day you invited Emily, Sera, Adam and Lute to join you..

Let's say you weren't bored during all the dinner.

The best moments are those of hugs.

Hugs with Azrael are the best because he wraps his wings around you while carrying you. It's so quiet and peaceful that it puts you to sleep, which is very useful especially when you can't fall asleep.

Hugs with the whole family are... interesting ?

I mean, from the outside it looked like a mess of nameless feathers-

You are always in the middle of family hugs.

Azrael almost executed all the exterminators after learning about the extermination that was directed against the hotel when you were in it..

LET ME CANONIZE PROTECTIVE!DAD!AZRAEL.

[anonymous-dentist]

Or: Soulmates share their dreams every night and can communicate in them, but it's Spiderbit

For day three of @smallchaoscryptid's Spiderbit Week - Soulmates

-

Dream One: How to Train Your Dragon

He blinks awake and finds himself far from the battlefield. His clothes are dry and not muddy, his skin is clean, his teeth feel dull in his mouth.

He's in a strange room: fireplace, stiff bed beneath him(but, really, any kind of bed is better than what he's had since the War started.) The smell of cooked fish.

He grimaces. He likes cooked flesh better, thanks.

This is a dream. He knows it's a dream, so he doesn't hesitate in hopping out of bed and stretching. There isn't a burn in his muscles, and the dull ache of his growing bones is finally gone. Heck yeah.

It's peaceful, in a way. Weird, but peaceful. Really disconcerting, but peaceful.

And then a monster screeches outside loud enough to shake the windowpanes.

He instinctively reaches for his sword, realizes that, right, dream. Of course he wouldn't have his sword in his dreams, that would be stupid.

He runs outside, anyway, because duh. If there's a monster, he wants to see it!

He sees the dragon first: large and yellow and missing one of its legs. It growls at him with a weird dragony smile, and he smiles back.

He sees the child second: short with messy hair and freckles. He gasps when he sees him and runs at him with a gap-toothed smile.

"Hi!" he chirps. He's speaking Portuguese, but that isn't what his mouth is saying. Dream stuff, huh, must be translating everything.

Neat.

"You're my soulmate, right?" the boy asks. He looks him over appraisingly. "You aren't that much older than me."

He scoffs, crosses his arms. "I'm literally so much older than you."

"Yeah? Well, how old are you, then?"

He blinks, throat dry. "I'm-" (He can't remember. But Bad always says that he looks to be about 13, so...) "-13. So I'm way older than you."

The boy puffs his chest out annoyedly. "Only by a few years. Screw you!"

The dragon flies off, bored. He would care more if there wasn't an annoying little kid in front of him pissing him off.

He takes an angry step forward, arms falling to his sides and hands balling into fists. He might not have his sword, but he can still beat up a kid easy.

"Screw you!" he shouts. "Get out of my dream! I wanna go hang out with the dragons."

"It's our dream, idiot," the kid huffs. "We're soulmates, duh. My grandpa says that everyone shares dreams with their soulmates, so we're obviously soulmates."

"What the fuck is a soulmate?"

The kid gasps, all anger pouring out of his tiny little body. "You don't know what a soulmate is?"

He doesn't know what his own name is, but he isn't exactly gonna tell some kid that.

He turns to leave and go find the dragon, but he's stopped by both of the kid's tiny hands grabbing his sleeve and pulling at him until he stays.

He turns to look at the kid, and the kid smiles and explains.

-

"Soulmates are, well, soulmates, okay? They're like super best friends, that's what my grandpa says. His soulmate is dead, but they still hang out in his dreams because that's where your soulmate lives until you find them. And after you find them, too, I think, but I dunno. He says he never met his soulmate before they died, but I think he's lying 'cause he's really silly sometimes."

"Okay, but. Us? You and me? You're a kid."

"You're a kid, too, you know."

"Nuh-uh. I'm a soldier."

"A kid soldier. But, anyway, we're soulmates! When we meet in the real world, we're gonna be best friends, I can tell!"

"Yeah? Well, don't be too sure. I don't do friends."

"Wow, you're emo."

"What the fuck did you just say to me?!"

-

Dream Thirty-Two: Cyberpunk

He laughs as he chases the kid through the slimy, neon-ridden back alleys of the city. He's on a motorcycle, because of course he is, but the kid is on foot.

"Just give up already!" he shouts.

The kid flips him off over his shoulder, grinning widely. He keeps tripping over his own shoelaces, because he's running like an idiot, but he's somehow still faster than the motorcycle.

He doesn't know the kid's name because the kid decided it wouldn't be fair to have a name when he doesn't know his own. Sweet kid. Shame he's annoying.

"Fuck you!" the kid replies. He then proceeds to trip over the cuff of his pants and fall right onto his face in a muddy puddle.

He cackles triumphantly and slows the bike to a stop. He hops off it and goes to poke at the kid until he gives up, but... but he's crying. Quietly, he's crying quietly, but his shoulders are shaking, and, oh, right, he's a child. He's the younger one.

His face falls. He kneels next to the kid and helps him sit up with a frown.

"Are you okay?" he asks.

The kid's lip wobbles, and his eyes shine, but he nods. "It's just a dream. It doesn't really hurt."

He isn't convinced, but, well. It is a dream. Nothing matters in a dream, right?

"Okay," he hesitantly says. "Come on, let's go play laser tag or something."

The kid's eyes light up. "Cool! I'm gonna kick your ass!"

"Oh, really?" he challenges. "You're on!"

And they run off, motorcycle forgotten.

-

"How did you beat me!?"

"I'm just a God Gamer, dude. Get on my level."

"You are so annoying."

-

Dream Seven Hundred and Fifty-Two: High School

"I think I'm going to give myself a name," he announces.

The kid's eyes widen. "Really? Took you long enough."

He rolls his eyes, but the kid isn't wrong. They've been meeting in their dreams for, what, two years? And they still don't have anything to call each other but "idiot" and "you" and "asshole".

But, well, it's about time, he thinks. The War is ending soon, he thinks. Bad says so, at least, and he's pretty good with knowing when things end.

With the War ending, he's going to have to go out into the "real world"... if he doesn't manage to follow Bad where he goes next. But where's the fun in that?

He shrugs. "I need a name. If I don't have one, I can't join the army."

"Why do you wanna join the army?"

"So I can keep killing people, duh. How else am I supposed to get food?"

"Uh, the store?"

"What's that?"

The kid rolls his eyes and pushes his shoulder. "You're literally stupid, what the heck?"

They're in some kind of food line, he thinks. They shuffle forward as the faceless teenagers in front of them get their trays and continue through the line.

He picks up his own tray and wrinkles his nose at the food he sincerely hopes isn't about to be placed on it. Where's the meat?

"What kind of name do you want?" the kid asks.

He's hit some kind of growth spurt, because he's finally up to his shoulder. Still short, though. Loser.

"Dunno," he responds. "I'll think of something later, probably."

-

"What about... Peter?"

"No."

"Miles."

"No."

"Miguel."

"No."

"Ben."

"No."

"You suck!"

-

Dream One Thousand and Ninety-Five: Mermaids

"Call me Cell," he says.

The kid- not quite a kid anymore, much closer to Cell's age when the soulmate dreams started- cocks his head curiously.

"Like, as in a cell phone?" he asks.

Cell grins as shark-like as the tail he's currently sporting.

"Exactly," he says.

The kid's eyes narrow. "Or, like in a prison cell. Did you kill someone again?"

"...Maybe, but-"

"Oh my God, how are we supposed to meet each other if you're in jail!"

The kid swims around in a frustrated circle around Cell, who just watches him, placid. Calm. Totally cool, definitely not at all sheepish over pissing his soulmate off.

That would be ridiculous.

Cell doesn't get sheepish, and he definitely doesn't feel regret. Not over some kid.

...Some kid who's his soulmate. They're best friends already, though, so he should be fine with Cell being stuck in prison for a bit.

Cell rolls his eyes and reaches out and grabs the kid and stops him from swimming. He looks him in the eyes, and he smiles, softer than intended. (He's Cell! He isn't soft. He's a killer!)

"Calm down," he drawls. "I'll be out of here before you know it."

"Really?" the kid asks. "Is your sentence that short?"

"Nah, I'm gonna break out."

He lets the kid go and starts swimming off in a random direction, not waiting for the kid to follow. (He does.)

"Must be a shitty prison, then," the kid comments.

"Trust me, I'll be out soon, and then I can try getting up to Mexico again to see you."

"Then I can teach you how to drive."

Cell flicks his tail at him annoyedly. "Shut up, I can already drive."

"No way."

"Yes way!"

They continue bickering and chasing each other through the coral until Cell feels consciousness tickling at him.

"Hey," he asks, "I told you my name. You tell me yours."

The kid smiles, and he does.

-

"My name is Roier."

"And my name is Cell."

"You already told me that, idiot."

"Oh, yeah."

-

Dream One Thousand, Eight Hundred, and Twenty-Seven: 1920s Mafia

Even in his dreams, he's dying. He's in a pool of his own blood with a couple dozen bullets plugged into his chest, but it doesn't hurt quite as much as the goddamn betrayal burning his skin from the inside out.

If he dies in the dream, he wakes up. Cell knows this, so he's more than a little annoyed about the whole dying thing. At least in his dreams, dying doesn't hurt.

The cops that killed him have already long gone. They may not have had faces, but Cell knows precisely who they looked like. All four of them were traitors, all four of them!

"Bastards," he spits. He groans as the movement of his tongue alone sets off flares of imaginary pain (because he can't feel pain in dreams, but he sure can imagine what it feels like) all throughout his body.

In the real world, he's starving to death in a cave. In the dream world, he's choking on his own blood.

Great.

His eyes slip closed, and he waits to wake up.

He doesn't react as a pair of heels click towards him.

"Cell?" Roier asks, but his voice is just the slightest bit off. But, then again, he is a teenager now. His voice is going to be doing all sorts of weird shit. "Oh my God, Cell! What the- hold on!"

Cell gasps as he's rolled onto his back. His eyes flutter open, and he sees... a girl? A girl in a really bad wig. With even worse makeup.

"Roier?" he mumbles. "What are you wearing?"

Roier looks down at himself- red sparkly dress and all- and blushes slightly. "I'm... trying something out. But what happened? You showed up in the dream and you ran off and I heard gunshots and you're so stupid, what the fuck?!"

He grits his teeth and smacks Cell lightly on the shoulder. But that's still enough to wrack Cell's body with pain.

"I'm sorry," he wheezes, eyes squinting closed once more. "I'm dying."

"It's a dream, Cell. I'm just pissed you're leaving this early. You just got here!"

"No, Roier. I'm dying. In the real world."

Roier goes quiet.

Cell swallows the blood in his throat and continues, "Pac and Mike and... and Guaxinim. They betrayed me. Left me on an island. I'm dying."

"You can't be," Roier faintly says. "We haven't met yet."

"Didn't your grandfather say he sees his soulmate in his dreams? We'll be fine."

"My grandpa is also senile. Cell, I- you're so stupid."

Something wet falls onto Cell's cheek, but it isn't rain. It never rains in dreams. It's always sunny.

Fuck. He made Roier cry. Maybe is a monster after all, and not in the good way.

The dream world starts dissolving, starting with Cell's fingertips. It... tingles.

Why can't real death be as soft?

-

"You better live, or... or I'll never talk to you again!"

"I... I'll try. Roier, I'll try."

-

Dream Two Thousand, Five Hundred, and Fifty-Five: My Little Pony

Tonight, he's a horse.

Why not.

It's his first dream in, what, two weeks? He hasn't slept long enough to dream. It's hard to sleep when all he sees until the dreams kick in is his own mistakes.

But, well. Cell turned 20 today (he thinks, he's still not sure about his actual age), and Felps got him drunk to celebrate. Drunk means sleepy, and sleepy means dreams, and dreams mean-

"Roier!" he calls, running through the streets of the pony town desperately. "I made it!"

Roier knows that he's been having trouble sleeping since his whole moral dilemma thing started after Alcatraz. He doesn't quite get it, but he's trying, and that's all that matters, right?

None of the faceless ponies pay Cell any attention as he goes, but that's fine. Fuck them. He promised his best friend that they'd see each other, and they're going to see each other.

He doesn't have to look too far, thankfully, because, a few moments in, a blazing red blur bolts out of the sky and tackles Cell to the ground.

"Happy birthday!" Roier exclaims.

He grins, wings flaring behind him. What's this called, a pegasus?

Roier's eyes widen, and his jaw drops in shock. "What the fuck, you're a unicorn? Lucky!"

Cell tries looking at his own horn, going so far as to go cross-eyed, but all he manages to do is make himself look goofy.

It makes Roier laugh, at least. That's good. He's been having... a rough time, Cell thinks. He's been quieter when they have been able to meet up. Something about his brother leaving to go to college: a child prodigy gone to an exclusive university and leaving his twin behind.

Cell can't imagine what it would be like to have a twin. Weird, right? Someone that looks just like him but is different? Yeah, no thanks.

(He gave up on any ideas of family a long time ago. Thinking about whoever he had before the War just makes him sad.)

"You're red," Cell intelligently says.

"And you're green. You look like shit."

Cell bites Roier's ear and smiles as Roier lets out an exaggerated scream.

"Missed you," Cell says, and he means it.

"Yeah, well, I didn't miss you at all," Roier sniffs.

But Cell doesn't believe him at all.

-

"I still can't believe your brother's name is Doied."

"Our parents weren't very original."

"Maybe you should do what I did and just pick a name."

"Fuck you, man, I like my name!"

"Lucky. I wish I could change mine. It's too... heavy."

"I mean, you already did it once. Just do it again."

"...You're right."

"I usually am."

-

Dream Four Thousand, Seven Hundred, and Forty-Eight: Medieval

Cellbit hasn't seen Roier for days, and he's maybe starting to freak out. Maybe. Just a little.

Just before he'd disappeared, Roier had mentioned winning some kind of lottery. He was excited, and Cellbit was excited for him. He'd been looking for his asshole twin brother for years, he deserved a break.

But then the break happened.

And Roier hasn't slept since, apparently.

But Cellbit sleeps every night, anyway, even if he'd much rather be spending his nights trying to figure out where the fuck his soulmate went. Because Roier's... Roier is his soulmate. They've been sharing dreams for thirteen years now, they're best friends, and Cellbit is dying without him.

Tonight's dream has Cellbit in a knight's costume drinking flavorless alcohol in a bar. Nothing has tasted right since Roier has disappeared.

He isn't dead, at least. If he was dead, then he would be in the dreams. So he's just... not sleeping. Somewhere. Somewhere not sleeping.

Cellbit's hand shakes with rage and fear as he raises his cup to his lips.

He isn't a killer anymore. Well, he is, but he only kills animals now. He's a butcher, but not in the serial killer way. In the... in the butcher way.

(His hands itch for more blood, but he's been trying to do better.

He can't meet Roier if he's in prison, after all.)

It's as he's drinking that the bar's door slams open and stumbling in comes Roier in fancy robes with a gold crown perched on top of his head.

Cellbit drops his cup and immediately gets off of his stool to rush to Roier's side.

"Roier, what the fuck?" he demands. "Where have you been?"

He pulls Roier into a tight hug, mindful of his armor.

God, is he crying? How embarrassing, but Roier's seen worse from him.

But:

"I'm sorry, who are you?" Roier asks.

And Cellbit's heart drops.

Roier wriggles free and looks Cellbit over. This... this can't be Roier, can it? Because there's no recognition in his eyes as he looks at Cellbit, and no slight blush as Cellbit looks at him.

Roier gasps. "Oh, wow. Are you my soulmate?"

Cellbit's eyes sting. "I- yes, Roier, are you alright?"

"I'm fine. Kinda annoyed that you took so long, though."

Roier smacks Cellbit's shoulder.

Cellbit can't breathe.

"I'm 21, motherfucker!" Roier shouts. "What took you so long!"

"I've been here," Cellbit faintly says. "Roier, I've been here. What happened to you? You said you- you got invited to some island? And then you disappeared? What happened?"

Something sparks behind Roier's eyes, but it's gone as fast as it appears.

"I've been alone for years!" Roier exclaims. He groans and runs his hands through his hair, almost knocking the crown off his head. "God, what is Spreen going to think?"

"Spreen? Who's Spreen?"

And then Roier blushes, and he grins, and Cellbit feels sick to his goddamn stomach.

"Spreen is my best friend," Roier tells him, and Cellbit wants to kill.

-

"Where are you? In the real world?"

"On the island. Where are you? Maybe Osito Bimbo can bring you or something. We have train stations, there's gotta be special tickets for soulmates."

"I'm in Brazil. What island?"

"Quesadilla Island, of course."

-

Reality: Day One

Cellbit's head is killing him. Fucking... what happened? He can't... he can't remember...

"Cellbit, you doing okay?" Felps asks.

He seems fine, sitting on the ground and not at all caring about the literal shipwreck they're stuck in.

"Oh, sure, as Cellbit if he's doing okay," Mike scoffs. He's still not over the whole prison thing, but he'd been angry enough when hearing about Cellbit's soulmate being kidnapped to help kickstart the whole rescue mission.

What a good friend.

Pac rolls his eyes. "He's literally bleeding, Mike. Look at him!"

Oh, shit, is Cellbit bleeding?

He raises a hand to his head; it comes away bloody, oh.

At least it's stopped raining outside. Cellbit can't see much, trapped with the others in what might be some kind of office space just below-deck. But he can't hear the rain anymore, and he can't hear any thunder.

"I'm fine," he sighs. "I've had worse. We should-"

He's cut off by a shout from outside.

Pac's eyes widen comically. "This island is occupied?"

Apparently so, because in comes a whole stream of people through a single door inlaid in the far wall. Tall man in what has to be anime cosplay, slightly shorter man covered in... green goo? Woman in purple. Man in bucket hat. And...

Cellbit's eyes meet Roier's, and the world slots into place around them.

Cellbit stumbles up to the glass wall and presses his hands against it. So close...

Roier is much more hesitant to approach (he still hasn't found that Spreen guy yet, of course he's hesitant...), but he offers Cellbit a small, genuine smile.

(He's so much more handsome in person, what the fuck? When did this happen? He was shorter than Cellbit just a moment ago, he swears.)

"Finally," Cellbit breathes.

The crowd around them is drowned out by the sound of Roier's voice as he says, awed-sounding, "You actually came for me."

"Of course I did," Cellbit replies. He smiles. "We're soulmates, aren't we?"

Tears well up in Roier's eyes- happy tears, Cellbit knows him well enough to be able to tell the different by now.

And then the door opens.

[the-froschamethyst4]

You, Me, Wine, No Clothes

𖤐Pairing: Husband! Alejandro x Wife! Reader

𖤐Pronouns: She/Her

𖤐Warnings: smut, language, drinking, P in V, nudity, kissing/making out, wedding anniversary, badly translated Spanish, breeding kink, spanking, groping, hand job, licking, boob and nipple play,

𖤐Summary: Alejandro loves it when it’s his and his wife’s wedding anniversary, means no kids around, just them and their alone time together

————

————

“Mami, I don’t wanna go,” Santiago whines as he gets out of the car.

“Well, it’s just for the night, Santi. Come on, your Abuela (grandma) and Abuelo (grandpa) are waiting,” Y/n rushes her 5 year old son and 3 year old daughter into her husbands parents house.

She knocks on the door before it was open by Alejandro’s mother.

“Ahh~ Mis nietos (my grandchildren),” she coos before picking up Maria and kissing her temple and bending down to Santiago placing a on his forehead.

“Mami~” he whines.

“Go on, and behave,” Y/n warns her oldest and thanked Alejandro’s father.

As Y/n was coming home, Alejandro was setting up everything. Rose pedals that led to the master bedroom, dimmed lights everywhere in the house, and only candles lighting the house, he even sprayed some of his expensive cologne he knew Y/n loved and goes feral for.

Alejandro then wrote a note placing it on the kitchen counter for Y/n to see.

Going back onto the master bedroom, Alejandro had starting stripping from his clothes and sitting on the edge of the bed completely bare.

It has been a while that Y/n and Alejandro have did anything, their last time doing it was somewhere along the lines of last year in the fall. They've been wanting to do it since then but gotten so tired and having two little ones draining them, they could never do it.

But thank god, they can finally have sex with no interruptions and no work the next day.

Y/n walks through the front door and she sees the paper on the marble countertop, she smiles and picks it up reading the note.

You, Me, Wine and No Clothes. Was all it said on it. She smirks to herself and starts stripping from her clothes as she walks up the stairs to hers and Alejandro's bedroom.

As she makes it to the bedroom door, and pushes it open, just only had her underwear on as to tease him.

"I think you missed a piece," he says, giving her a glass of wine, she takes it with a smile, sipping from it as Alejandro hugged her waist kissing her hips, stomach and then down to her panties.

He pulls her panties down and she steps out of it. He kisses her thighs, he looks up at her, she was looking down at him cupping his chin and kissing his lips.

"Tonight, is just you, mi amor."

"It should be for the both of us," she says with a little giggle.

"No...you wanna know what Maria had asked me?" He asks.

"What?"

"She wants a little sister, sometimes Santiago just wants to play his video games. She wants a sister to play dress up with," he smiles up at her. "Are you ready to carry one more?"

"Are you ready to handle my mood swings again?" She asks him.

"I'm ready for anything," he kisses her stomach.

Within seconds Alejandro had stood up picking up Y/n, her legs wrapped around his waist and she made sure the glass of wine didn't spill on him or anywhere.

"The room looks amazing," she says, looking around the room before kissing Alejandro's lips. His hands held under her butt and the other cupping her face.

Her arm resting on his shoulder while the other held her wine glass. The kiss became heated, his tongue pushed its way into her mouth, she slightly moaned into the kiss when Alejandro started to squeeze her butt.

He hand that held her face slid down her face and started to grope her breast. Y/n moans and continues to kiss his lips. Alejandro sat on the edge of the bed and grabs the wine glass setting it on the little tray that sat on the big master bed.

"God...you are so fucking hot," Alejandro says.

Alejandro then kissed Y/n's neck, squeezing her butt earning more moans from her. He was being gentle with her, making her feel good and comfortable.

Alejandro laid on his back as Y/n started to kiss her chest and then up to his neck and then lips. As she was 'distracting' him with kisses her hand went down to his dick, it was soft which made her smirk into the kiss.

She starts pumping him, he groans into the kiss and she could feel him growing in her hand. She then starts to lower herself on his dick, they both moaned and she starts to slowly bounce on him.

He smirks watching her do all the work. His hands resting on her hips, pinching and squeezing the fat of her hips and butt.

Her breasts bouncing, his eyes only watching her breasts move up and down and moaned when hearing them slap against her skin. He bucks up every so often to hear her soft moans.

She tosses her head back, her hands went from his thighs to resting on his stomach. Alejandro smirks and then flips Y/n on her back, pounding into her. Her hands resting on his shoulders as he now starts doing all the work.

He watches her face with so much pleasure written on her face. As Alejandro started to pick up the pace, he looks at the bottle of red wine shaking back and forth on the tray on the bed.

He takes the bottle taking a swing of it before dumping the rest on to Y/n's body, starting with her chest and watching it run down her chest to her stomach, he smirks licking up the wine between her breasts and then her neck.

Sucking on her neck leaving small purple bruises. Y/n moans when feeling his tongue drag all over her body.

"The sheets A-Alejandro-"

"Are you really worried about t-the sheets right now, mi amor?" He asks. She only giggles and moans when feeling him starting to just barely hit her good spot.

Alejandro then leaned down taking her breast into his mouth and his hand playing with her harden nipples. Her moans were soft and filled Alejandro's ears.

Soon Alejandro's thrusts became sloppy, but still rough. He watches her toss her head back she felt a knot in her stomach and she ended up coming on his dick, he came but was still thrusting pushing come inside of her.

"A-Ale-" she tosses her head back again, coming quickly again.

"Fuck," he says, resting his forehead on her chest. "I forget how fucking good you are," he says, kissing her lips.

"I love you," she tells him. "Also...you're cleaning the bedsheets while I get this wine off me," she says, getting off the bed and heading to the bathroom.

"CAN YOU STILL BE NAKED WHEN YOU COME BACK!?" Alejandro yells from the bedroom.

"WE'LL SEE!" Y/n yells back.

----------

Y/n had walked out of the bathroom towel around her waist as she used another towel to dry her hair.

"Wow, I naked under here and you're in a towel," Alejandro shakes his head.

Y/n only smiles and drops her towel, he was like a dog, staring at her like she was a bone, it he had a tail, Y/n knows it would be wagging back and forth.

Y/n walks to the bed and plops down on her side of the bed, Alejandro lifts the covers letting Y/n get under the covers and draping them back over her, he pulls her closer to his body and kiss her lips.

"I'll get the kids tomorrow," Alejandro says.

"No, it's okay, I told your father, that they can bring them back whenever they want," Y/n tells her husband, playing with his chest hair.

"Oh so round two tomorrow?" He asks.

"Maybe," she smiles, sitting up and leaning down kissing Alejandro's lips.

----------

"O-Oh my god!" Y/n tosses her head back as Alejandro was pounding into her faster and harder. Her face was buried into her pillow, moaning being muffled but not for long. Alejandro had grabbed a handful of her hair pulling her head up and wanting to hear her moans.

"H-Holy fuck!" They both moaned before coming at the same time. Y/n smirks and Alejandro kisses her lips.

"MAMI! PAPI!" They both heard Maria's voice.

Both parents quickly gathered their clothes, putting on new clothes, Y/n fixed her hair as Alejandro went down first picking up his kids and kissing them.

He thanks his parents for bring them back.

"We came back a bit early."

"It's just alright, mami," he says.

"Hi," Y/n came downstairs.

"MAMA!" Maria yelled.

"Hi, my baby," Y/n bends down picking up her daughter kissing her temple. "Thank you for watching them," Y/n says.

"Anytime, love birds," his mom wiggled her eyebrows.

"Mami," Alejandro whines.

"Come on, amor," his father says escorting his wife out of the house.

---------

"How was the night with your grandparents?" Y/n asked her children.

"We played bored games," Santiago says.

"That seems fun."

"I rather play my video games," he says, before heading upstairs.

"Maria, you wanna bake some cookies with me?"

"Yes, mama," she says with a big smile on her face.

[dr-spectre]

your most recent post reminds me how much I don't enjoy overtly negative octavio depictions and callie being treated as a "brainwashed hapless victim) due to how it feels like an oversimplification of the lore as well as translation cherry picking

(it's also why i can't get behind "morally good" cuttlefish like hi he canonically recruits children too consider he enlisted his own grandchildren into his literal secret operation + if we count the English translation as the all holy translation is behaviour towards marina is genuinely vile "I don't see species" DUDE???l

It gives a sense that when we see callie still caring about Dj Octavio, it comes from a sense that she gets him, as well as a more fanon interpretation on my end, that she feels like at least he reached out to her, he could've easily kicked her out of octo canyon but he let her stay

And that probably meant a lot to her, even if quite a bit of it was maybe manipulation, it was still more than what she got on the surface, because on the surface, all she was was an idol people could see and bombard with photos, a brand. And not a person.

It's like hell on nuanced earth 😭

Uh

Woopsies this is very long 💀💀💀💀

I don't have much to say about this. I've ranted about Callie and DJ Octavio for so fucking long man. And i ain't gonna stop until i can go on Inkipedia without groaning, or watch a YouTube video where some random guy doesn't just reads off a wiki page and nothing else. I'm getting really really tired.

Sometimes the Splatoon community really makes me upset and it's lack of giving a shit on what words they use. Brainwashing and Hypnosis are on opposite sides definition wise. STOP USING THEM INTERCHANGEABLY!!!!! I HAD ENOUGH!!!!! THIS APPLIES TO OTHER MEDIA TOO!!!!!!!!! ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

God. I would rather the Splatoon community push a "Callie and her second octopus grandpa" dynamic over the malicious takes people have said for over 7 years. Why do we want that shit for Callie and Octavio? Ugh... Oh well. I'll keep ranting over and over again, i don't care anymore. I don't care if i seem mean or pissed off. I am angry. (Plus i didn't get much sleep last night so i'm a bit bleh rn...)

[tyquu]

Here's the Ben whump rant i talked abt in my last post,,,

Ofc heed the triggers and what not: Blood, injury, ect ect

Also take everything here with a serious handful of salt, im being dramatic as heck. So if you don't wanna see me get serious abt something that's not that deep, this probably isn't the rant for you <3

Anywho...

Do you ever think about just how often Ben gets the absolute crap beat out of him? Like in Grudge Match, I forgot how many times he gets flung about in his human form. He's ten years old, his bones are way too weak for all that. The amount of head injuries he must get is insane, and Max never once seems to take Ben's injuries seriously. 

Like that time Ben gets sick after sitting in the back of an ice cream van for like,, twenty minutes. He's ill to the point it's actively inhibiting his ability to play hero, blinding wildmutt with gunked up sensors and taking the heat out of heatblast. He's pale and sniffly and looks like shit, but Max still makes the executive decision to drag him out on errands instead of giving him time to rest. 

Also just cause he takes the majority of damage in his alien forms doesn’t mean those injuries suddenly have no impact at all. I think in alien force they were toying with idea of his injuries carrying over becoming more of a problem for him, with his busted knee in season one, and black eye in the episode where he gets grounded. Either way, it’s still implied that wounds translate over after he de-transforms, even if to a lesser extent. Not to mention all the scrapes and little injuries he must get from de-transforming mid battle (on the occasions he does).

FUCK, I mean Ben actually displays short term memory loss as a direct result of getting hit in the head in alien force, and Gwen isn't concerned about it probably because she grew up with Grandpa Max not being concerned about it. She doesn't realise just how dangerous this level of head injury is, what the brain inflammation and possible bleeding could do to him. She's probably looked him in the eyes, with his pupils blown wide, dazed and confused about his whereabouts, and then buried her concern because it's nothing new right? Ben's been dealing with stuff like this since he was 10, and Max, the ever responsible adult, never shows the appropriate amount of concern for it, so it makes sense that both Gwen and Ben don’t consider these things serious until its too late. 

Like not to get all dramatic about this and over think it (more so than I already am lol) but I’m positive this stuff would have long term consequences for Ben’s health as he enters adult hood, or even before then. Trouble recalling things, ringing in his ears, migraines and headaches as well a light sensitivity, all of these are symptoms of repeated and serious head trauma. Not to mention, paired with my personal headcanons about the burning chemical sensation of having the omnitrix fused to his flesh, leaking fluid into his bloodstream and scorching his skin. Or the chronic nosebleeds I think he would have as a result of all these other health complications. There's just a LOT that can be done with Ben whump, and I’m surprised it isn’t talked about/thought about more? 

Folks love the idea of Ben being functionally immortal (at least from injury related death), and the power fantasy that comes with being the weilder of the omnitrix, but what about the fact that he’s just some guy?? That the omnitrix failsafe doesn’t protect him from everything, and that if the injuries are bad enough to have triggered the failsafe in the first place, then where does that leave him in terms of recovering from them??? Sorry, sorry, crazy moment. 

[alipeeps]

Episode 40 (aka Hold me, I am not ready for this!! 😭)

Gods I think I love Xue Li almost as much as Xiao Heng.

And that dude loves her a LOT.

LOOK at how he looks at her. LOOK!!

"Kill Xiao Heng and we'll live happily ever after"... dude, you have completely lost touch of reality. How can you believe for even a fraction of a second that she'd do that, that she'd choose you over him? She just told you a moment ago that she'd rather die with him that be with you.

YES XUE LI!!! Put the next one through his eye please!

Actually no, don't kill him. Let him live and suffer and regret.

"Killing you would dirty my hands." You tell him girl. He's nothing. He's not worth the blood on your hands.

I reckon 75% chance he's gonna throw himself off the battlements anyway. Coward.

Ahahahaaaa he's standing on the edge! Am I right? Am I?

CALLED IT!! 😂😂

Last thing he saw was her walking away. Love that for him.

Ooooh she's gonna cut her own throat on the sword....

Shiiit where's that tumblr image of apollo's dodgeball? I'm getting too good at this.

There goes your last leverage, shithead.

Aaaaand there goes your ability to breathe anything other than blood.

Yeah baby, get your revenge.

Ey up, the wind machine's back.

Hahahaa fucking hell grandpa Xiao making Xiao Heng serve him drinks on the excuse that he was injured saving Xue Li?! I'm pretty sure Xiao Heng was actually *more* injured - he took at least 3 sword slashes in the battle with Lord Cheng!

Okay but now I am really intruiged/worried cos the rebellion is over and there's like 30-odd minutes (and the much giffed scene of Xiao Heng in his armour with the pendant in his teeth) left to go so... wtf is gonna happen now?

Oooh Xiao Heng's going north to protect the border...

Bros 4eva!

Daddy Xue's back? For reals?

"She's got a husband now, how can she go back with us?" 😂

Awww and she's got daddy's approval for this one too! 😁

What do you think she means, Su Guogong, you dumbass? You gotta make that place fit for a wife! 😁

Hahaha Xiao Heng has bluescreened again!

It's kinda disturbing how rare it is in a cdrama for the main couple to get together, both survive and get to happily marry. HOWEVER... there's still 20 minutes and that scene to go!! 😭😭

Also am i the only one that keeps getting very nervous about the combination of wind machine, billowing drapes, and naked flame candles... 😬

Is she gonna admit to pappa Jiang that she's not Jiang Li? I'm pretty sure he already knows...

Yeeeeeah that's a nice lie Xue Li but it's a lie nonetheless. She did suffer and she was in pain. But okay...

I want this to be between you and me - and all the servants that just overheard our conversation.

Shit I thought for a second there he'd stroked out and died on the spot! 😂

This feels like she's saying goodbye to the Jiang family for good. She's married into the Xiao family now and the Jiang family are leaving the capital... and she's not really related to them, she's got no real reason to see them again...

Shijie is just too goddamn good and precious.

Ooft one thing that bugs me about the subs in this is that they don't properly translate titles/honorifics, they translate everything to the person's name. So the significance of her calling him ge is entirely lost to anyone who doesn't understand at least a little bit of Chinese.

(Also they do this with single syllable names which is even more egregious. They translate didi as Zhao, they don't even have the fucking courtesy to make it A-Zhao)

Awww I am sad that the haircombing scene was just her imagination... and I'm also worried that it's some kind of portent... 😭

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THEY KILLED LU JI!!!! 😭😭😭😭

I don't deserve this. After 40 episodes i do not deserve this how could you do this to me

Okay but Wen Ji I feel you fam I really do but Xiao Heng needs help!!

YOU BASTARDS!!

WHYYYYYYYYY??!! WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DO THIS TO ME?!! Why could they not just have a happy ending? What plot purpose does this even serve at this point?

Oh thank fuck I genuinely thought it was gonna end with it implying he was about to die on the battlefield.

I am dead. RIP me.

This was a fucking RIDE and I LOVED IT.

(Apart from them killing Lu Ji and Wen Ji for no reason 😭😭😭)

[toastymarshie]

Thinking about how Itadori and Fushiguro were probably never suppose to meet.

Feel free to disagree with my argument or chalk it up to me being a sad ass bitch, but it does feel like that.

Feel free to add to this post or send me an ask lol.

Why do I feel like this?

Well, I can’t pinpoint the exact reasons for why I feel this way, I can give some evidence to back it up. I know that JJK is a shonen and it was going to start with Itadori Yuji and end with or without him.

Ofc the most obvious one is Yuji’s death and path leading up to it.

(I will refer to the manga at this point if I will put anime screenshots if I just have them at hand)

Their first meeting

As you can see Fushiguro was impressed by Itadori’s natural strength. Even comparing him to Maki. However that was the extent he was willing to give to a random person. A very one sided interaction.

Until

This is the moment the narrative shifts for both Megumi and Yuji. Yuji carrying a curse since the beginning of their meeting (how ironic!) and Megumi is going after him. Sure it’s to retrieve Sukuna’s finger but it’s there.

For anyone who doesn’t know for some odd reason, Megumi’s name translates to Blessing hence why Toji and mama Fushiguro call him such. Yes, his name meaning is important to not only Yuji but to the major players such as Gojo.

Also we have to talk about Grandpa Itadori’s last request.

Of course we know now that Grandpa’s last words were a curse to Yuji. How this last request shapes Yuji as a person in the coming chapters. Another curse to add to the list of curses. (Do the note the rule of three)

Then we get the scene in the hospital after Yuji’s grandfather dies. (Abridged for time)

This is when the plot finally kicks in. Yuji unknowably putting his friends in danger and Megumi has to go save them and the finger. I don’t personally count this as a curse for Yuji as it’s just the direct effect of the first curse I noted. Remember that Yuji comes in when he remembers his grandpa’s words.

Then finally we get to the final curse

Ryomen Sukuna

Itadori Yuji’s last and final curse that sealed his fate. The very thing that led him to the path he’s in. Not just him but also Fushiguro Megumi. From Shibuya to the current arc (Chapter 244-245) both of them have been by each other’s side trying their best to break this curse.

Remember, Yuji was going to be executed once he ate the first finger but due to Gojo’s interference and Megumi’s own personal feelings he was given a choice.

The first chapter really set them up to meet each other regardless of the factors that scream don’t do it/don’t follow him. Especially in hindsight, you can feel the tragedy brewing before it even begins. You somewhat know the consequences in the first chapter and it only grows worse in the second.

But that what makes a good tragedy.

Fuck you Gege you one eye cat

Now I’m gonna bring up chapter 9 for a bit because it’s history is very interesting. Gege did say that if the series didn’t do well, he will leave Yuji dead. (Ofc this didn’t happen and please help me find the source of this information. I know it was stated in an interview but I couldn’t find a translated version.)

Even then, it just solidifies my feelings.

This is the ending of the story. How it’s suppose to end.

Someone said that this seemed like a confession and I have to agree. Whether it’s romantic or platonic, Fushiguro’s feelings for Itadori are real.

Hear that?

That’s me sobbing.

With the recent chapters, it seem bleak but I believe that we will see Fushiguro again.

Yuji and Megumi will meet again maybe for the last time. I’m not Gege, but I trust him not really to give them a proper ending.

[vickozone]

The Magnus Archives

-S4 Notes-

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

SOMETHING ABOUT FANART GOES HERE I THINK

<- previous notes

next notes ->

Handwriting translated below:

#121 Oliver. He’s dead and JON! YOU’RE OKAY!

#122 zombies and Jon’s first instinct from waking up from a 6 month coma is to read a statement. Icon.

#123 He just got back and Melanie wants to kill him and something is up with Martin. Also, The Web, I suppose. Coding?

#124 More Simon. What a guy. Also, Jon is… very concerned for Martin…

#125 The Slaughter is back and Melanie! CALM DOWN! MY HEADPHONES ARE ON LIFE SUPPORT AS IT IS!

#126 The Spiral clarity + Martin is being manipulated (SHE STABBED HIM!?)

#127 Another letter to Jonah. AND ELIAS IS JUST CHILLIN IN PRISON. GO OFF, KING!

#128 Breekon is nothing without Hope. The institute and ooo! Jon eye powers!

#129 Guy drowned in grandpa’s house and JON NEEDS AN ANCHOR! Also, very homosexual interaction.

#130 Meat ritual and JON! NO, SELF HARM IS BAD! YOU BETTER NOT DO WHAT I THINK YOU’RE IMPLYING!

#131 AAAA! AAAA! OH. OH NO. Jared is the Boneturner and Helen is an absolute queen <3

#132 Jon saves Daisy!! Yay! She is also The Hunt, but, whatever. The tapes drew him back…

#133 The Hunt ritual, and Basira… has feelingsss. The Hunt is about the chase, not the kill.

#134 The Extinction!? NO. Also Lukas is the worst. Hate that guy.

#135 “Have I ever told you how much I hate the sun?” -Manuela Lol, The Dark, The Vast, and The Lonely funded the space expedition.

#136 Annabelle! Creepy celeb puppet. And Daisy telling Jon he’s not responsible for everything gives hope. Yes! Therapy!

#137 The Slaughter ritual & Gertrude was fond of Gerry :( The Watcher’s Crown??

#138 “And then the sky blinked.” Elias is literally the ‘no need to thank me’ meme and Jonah and Smirke knew about the 14 fears and then he dies or smthn

#139 The life and crimes of Agnes. Jon MAYBE saw Peter’s plan and- PRAISE THE LORD, JON LIKES MARTIN!!

#140 Stupid Maxwell. Also, Santa is working working with the Devine Host (/j) & we’re going on a trip! :D

#141 Salesa statement from boat guy. Oh, Jon, I see why Martin has a crush on you now. 10/10 voice acting on everyone’s part.

#142 JEEZ, JON! You gave this poor woman literal trauma! Goodness…

#143 oh, it’s Manuela! Jon looked AT the darkness and HELEN IS A SAVIOR!

#144 MARTIN! We do NOT talk to people like that! Especially Daisy! This isn’t you! The Extinction is real, I guess, but, come on! Not cool.

#145 Gertrude is COLD. Dude’s head is somewhere in the institute- uh-

#146 5 people? Goodness, Jon. He can’t control it though, can he? Helen got Marcus and Basira is off to meet with Annabelle friggin Cane.

#147 Okay. No, he can control it. I love Anna. I also got Nikola flashbacks. Oh boy.

#148 Not 5 seconds in and Elias gets assaulted. Jon is worried for Martin and he read a statement about The Eye. A.

#149 Concrete Jungle. Oh and Martin is using Lonely powers. Greaaat.

#150 Homophobic endless houses and Melanie really said “nuh uh” to her job

#151 Simon is my new husband. Uhhh. He answered Martin’s questions, yada yada, he has Lonely powers

#152 More of The Buried. Jon and Helen chat more about avatar crap.

#153 Another odd desolation flesh cult, also Trevor and chic is here and he is HUNGRY

#154 Gerry’s dead dad gives a statement. J + M both F bomb, very gay, eye gouging is the only way out. (“It’s pretty drastic.” “What you gotta gouge your eyes out or something?” “…” “…” “…” “Fuck off.” <- funniest conversation in the whole series)

#155 Guy kills others to keep himself alive + MEL IS REMOVING HER EYES- OKAY-

#156 More extinction about an abandoned park and I am very scared for Martin

#157 another extinction- OMG MEL AND GEORGIE! Did… Helen stab Jon?

#158 SO MUCH. Martin played Lukas, Daisy is feral, ELIAS IS JONAH, Not!Sasha is loose, disaster duo is here, Martin is stuck in Lonely, Gertrude wanted ‘Elias’ to kill her. WHAT.

#159 Peter shares his story, is evaporated. “I see you, Jon…”

#160

Look at the sky, Martin. It’s looking back.

I OPEN THE DOOR!

[absolutelymadoka]

Intro !!! please be nice to me and ill be nice to u

Names: Jade, Jack, Zain, and my legal name but I'm legally not allowed to tell u i run the @a-silly-1ore-acc READ THE INTRO AND WARNINGS (it looks edgy as shit rn so be patient!!!) im a POC (black)

Pronouns: any and all :3 I'm aroace

i draw sometimes !!

*top interest *old interest *i don't know much but its kool interests: computer/mobile/any other device errors, true crime, puella magi madoka magica, girls last tour, IHNMAIMS, All tomorrow, body horror books in general, House of leaves, (not much rn ill find/remember more)

◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇

i don't have any diagnosed reading problems but if u type with special quirks ill take longer to respond (i don't require a translation) maybe autistic???? idk I'm not diagnosed but if I'm on here I might as well be

Did i mention that i like music STOMACH BOOK, femtanyl, Gezebelle Gaburgably, Operation Sodasteal, Nelward, Sasuke Haraguchi, Spellcasting, Ado, The Vanished People, Soddikken, Miski, Rio Romeo, Caravan Palace, Glass Beach, Jhariah, Maretu, Kikuo, 4lung, STYXVII, Will Wood, Club2Toyko (my brother!! go check him out!!!) That Handsome devil, Penelope Scott, Milk in the Microwave, Cricket, and Tyler the Creator!

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MY FRIENDS ARE THE BEST IN THE WORLD @rab1darachn1d -MY DAD !!!! HES THE COOLEST PERSON EVER @mechcanicalmadness -GRANDPA NOX!!!! KOOLEST ROBOT he also runs the @bungostraycreatures go check it out RN!! @remindertoclick <- CLICK EVERY DAY!!!!!

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BYI!! ▷ I'm a minor (if u r over 18 and want to be moots PLZ DONT BE WEIRD or Rabid will hunt u down) ▷ I swear alot and use slurs sometimes (I CAN RECLAIM DW!!!) ▷ i word stuff wrong sometimes :(( lmk and ill try to reword it better!!! ▷ I respond IMMEDITLY if i don't im prolly doing something important or smth

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—DNI—

× basic DNI (transphobes, homophobes, racists)

× THOSE RADQUEERS/ TRANSID (trace, transharmful/harmed, trans[disorders/mental illness]) yall are a strange bunch/neg ^idc about the harmless ones

× Endogenic, willows, tuplas idk much but u make my friend uncomfortable

× ZOOFILES, MAPS, and NECROS ew ew gross gross gross GET AWAY

× COM/PRO/DARKSHIPPERS GROOoooosss

× NSFW only blogs im a minor × ppl who are just shitty to therians, furries, xenogenders just admit ur sad

× pro ed /thinspo what × Radfems and terfs fucking what × Proisreals i hate u guys ◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◈◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇◇ i love u all just dont hurt anyone or urself!!!

[toxicanonymity]

RULES & FAQs

THIS BLOG IS 18+ NO MINORS 🔞

WELCOME ABOARD! This blog has amazing readers which makes it a lot of fun. You can call me Tox or Toxy (she/her). I usually write smut. Sometimes I write darkfic. I dabble in horror. Please do not follow me if you're sensitive to the warnings on my masterlists, found in my bio. Check your content settings to make sure you can see everything. Heed warnings on fics. Last updated July 2024.

Basics

Tox/Toxy, she/her, millennial. English or Spanish.

WIPs are on hiatus. I'm kinda struggling but trying to do my best. Thank you for your patience.

Do not copy, translate, or reupload my work. Do not put it into AI or make bots of it. Ty for understanding.

Please do not follow me if you are averse to dark content including dubcon and noncon.

Q: Are Requests open?

A: No, but questions are welcome 🩷

Q: Will you write more every inch/left in Lincoln?

A: I would like to. More here. For Every Inch, there are two more parts planned.

Q: When is [fic] coming back? How many chapters?

A: IDK, sorry :( If I knew I'd tell you. In the future, I'm not planning to release things as I write, I'm gonna try to finish everything before posting. Problem is I have a lot of one shot fails / play as I go AUs. We'll see. I can tell you Every Inch has 6 total parts planned.

Q: Did you read my fic?

A: I wish I could read everyone's fics, but in addition to there being a lot of you, I'm a slow/bad reader. I'm also overdosed on pedro rn, but I still share fics on @toxicrecs. You are welcome to send a fic or tag me if you think the readers here would like it. When I read a fic, I also reblog it here on main. I am most likely to read shorter drabbles/fics.

Q: AO3?

A: Here, I've done a lot of catching up but still not everything is on there. If there's something specific you would like me to bring over let me know and I will.

Q: Tag list?

A: Please follow @toxicfics, use the person icon to turn on notifications, and use this trick for getting a tab on your dashboard just for your blog subscriptions so you can see what you missed.

Q: Are the fics always dark on this blog?

A: No.

Q: What is the brothel?

A: I HC my characters as living in a brothel which has its own crack sideblog @toxicbrothel.

Q: What are Joelkémons?

A: Reader-coined term for the Joel variants on this blog. Some are listed here: Joelkémon cards.

Q: Can we make your characters into bots?

A: No, please don't do this. It makes me feel bad and they don't even work. Every time, it puts me farther away from updating the fic. Please lmk if you ever see my work made into a bot, copied, etc. Please don't draw attention to it without speaking to me first 🙏🏼 I generally like to keep things quiet and not make a big deal out of it.

Q: Who's night walks!Joel? Who's thighs out?

A: Night Walks is an AU where Joel is your hot, older, creepy pothead neighbor. Night walks masterlist. Thighs out (another AU) is your boyfriend's hot slutty dad.

Q: What's a HOG? Who/what is GILF?

A: Hot Old Guy, from Silence can never be bought pt. 2 and 5. GILF is grandpa I'd Like to Fuck and may refer to the one from Pawn Shop (Joel in his 60s) @gilfjoel.

Q: Who is Dr. Rock?

A: Hot sex therapist who roleplays my characters. Dr. Rock is also the poster boy for avoiding discourse.

Q: Do you still write slashers?

A: Yes. I just wrote my first Thomas Hewitt in March 2024. Main/slashers masterlist.

Q: What other fics & blogs do you rec?

A: Please check out @toxicrecs

Q: How can I stay motivated to write without getting a lot of notes?

A: Please see these posts: here and here.

Q: Which anon tags are taken?

A: 🍯 🍹 🍓🦡

Q: Why did you unfollow me?

A: I could've lost (some or all) interest in your fandom. I may have forgotten why I followed you, especially if what you're posting has changed. Or I might be wanting to reduce the discourse I see.

✨Q: Am I blocked? Why can't I see your main blog from my account? / Did you soft block me?

⚠️ A: The most common reasons I block are for policing or judging what others post, kink shaming, or spreading harmful rumors. ⚠️

When it comes to rumors and shaming, silence is not a sign of guilt or agreement. It's confidence in the truth and desire to keep harmful takes off the dash. As a rule, I would ignore and block false accusations, rumors, or kink shamers instead of giving them a huge audience by responding or addressing it.

Harmful takes in the wild / targeted harassment: blocked. And if a post is bad enough--such as calling for targeted harassment of writers or trivializing a serious crime by casually accusing writers of it, I may block people for positively interacting with it. I don't want to be on your dash if you share those views, even if it's about something I don't write. On my blog, it's important for readers to be able to understand fiction can't be equated with real life. And who's to say I won't offend or traumatize you on a different topic one day? It's for your own good.

You can get blocked on anon too.

[obstinaterixatrix]

I read all of The Honest Life of a Game Studio and now I am obsessed do you have recs for anything like it.

I wish. I FUCKING WISH. but it’s really one of a kind. higefusa really just wrote mundane slice of life office drama with the level of detail that could only be provided by a gamer who has worked in the industry AND he threw in some life or death stakes as a treat. how often do we get an incredibly normal office worker stuck in time prison??? and it’s ONE ARC??? not often enough.

none of these are gonna be just like game-ya but in terms of romances with attention to detail for industry/niche fields… ok all of these are gonna be kind of weird so bear with me.

double section is a BL about an auditor for an insurance company and an insurance salesman, I wouldn’t necessarily give it a blanket rec but I liked how Passionate the main characters were about audits and workplace regulations. a lot of heated drama for the most normal office setting possible. in the author’s note the artist talks about interviewing health insurance salesmen.

ginmokusei is more of a conventional BL but it’s about a guy who inherited his grandpa’s tailor shop and an ex ma��tre d who shows up and demands to help him before he goes bankrupt. there’s a little bit about branding and marketing and bank loans. what has Always Stayed With Me is when the love interest basically goes like ‘you’re using all these flashy ads and being really pushy with discounts. are you selling beef bowls.’ every time I pass a clothes shop that goes really flashy with the discount banners I think ‘are they selling beef bowls…’

panel x magic. okay I said it was going to be weird. so this yuri is about a recent graduate who applies for office jobs and ends up doing image editing for… I guess a brothel? it doesn’t go into critiques of the sex industry, but I thought it was interesting how it takes a really logistical perspective in terms of marketing, advertising, and image manipulation… one of the chapters has the main character going like ‘oh god I’m trying to edit this risqué photo by making the thighs thinner and giving the face a glow-up but I keep making the model look like a weird alien this looks like something from a photo booth’ and gets advice from her coworkers like ‘hey why don’t you look up makeup tutorials to get a sense of what to touch up.’ hasn’t been translated in a while but it kind of hits that… really in-depth look at the logistics of a job.

I think there’s more I’m not remembering at the moment, at one point I think sundry made a joke about rating office romances by how much office work is shown. there’s a couple ones that *kinda* fit but not really… wait. wait wait wait. WAIT. oh my god it has such a h•rny title. okay. so I’m being 100% sincere when I say that the main story for hammered and pounded is a BL with interesting office politics. it’s also incredibly h•rny, but game-ya gets pretty h•rny so whatever. but yeah there’s a whole subplot where the love interest, who works in sales, has actually always wanted to work in R&D, and it becomes A Whole Thing where the head of R&D is in conflict with the head of sales over whether or not a transfer is gonna happen and there’s no romance involved with the conflict it’s all office politics

and in a similar vein, to your right, you will see my boyfriend is about a guy who’s working as a tour guide in kyoto and at the artist talks about how she used to work as a tour guide. I think it’s fun, though I have my qualms. the main character does do studying about how to be an effective tour guide and goes from being like ‘ugh I’m saying all the facts but no one’s listening’ to ‘haha check out this extremely long name of the temple we’re about to see! make sure to remember it, it’ll be the password for getting off the bus ;D’

I have another category of vaguely similar vibes of genre bending mundane office work + fantastical situations

tokusatsu gagaga is a gen series that’s a BIG fave of mine, the main character is an OL who loves tokusatsu so she imagines a lot of scenarios with that sort of vibe. it’s not diagetic, but it’s really fun when it’s stuff like ‘I’M AT KARAOKE WITH MY COWORKERS BUT I CAN’T OUT MYSELF AS A TOKUSATSU OTAKU THIS IS JUST LIKE BEING ATTACKED BY A KARAOKE-THEMED MONSTER EMERJASON HELP ME!!!!’ the eng tl hasn’t been updated in a while but there’s a live action adaption that’s really good

magilumiere co. ltd. is a gen series that’s basically ‘what if magical girls were like… sanitation workers for monsters’ so it’s a lot of company logistics in a fantastical setting. I don’t think I got that far into it before getting distracted, but it was interesting (though perhaps overly generous/idealistic about start-ups as a concept).

[kiwibirb1]

okay since i cant write right now AU MEETUP TIME BABY todays topic: scars

oh also just for reference C![name] means canon, BT![name] means Bronze Toad AU, WV![name] means Wandering Vagabond AU, and CiH![name] means Calamity in Hyrule AU. These might might slowly get replaced with nicknames once i figure them all out (aka BT is like nicknames from the start)

BT!Marcy(Marbles): Okay, why does everyone have scars!? You are all children! BT!Sasha(Heron): Oi got mine defending you?? Marbles: Okay, well yeah, but you're an adult! What about the rest of you? C!Sasha: Which one? WV!Sasha: (She signs btw, so that's what '' this is. His Marcy is translating for everyone or smthn) '...What do you mean which one? Do you have more? WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED WHEN I WENT WITH GRIME!?' C!Sasha: Oh no actually this one *points to cheek* was Anne when we fought and then this one *turns around and lifts back of shirt* was when I fought Marcy but she was possessed so it's all cool now. *Both C!Anne and C!Marcy give thumbs up. Everyone looks horrified.* CiH!Anne: Who did this to you children? (Uh I actually haven't figured out if CiH is aged up so it is at least slightly here k) WHY WAS MARCY POSSESSED? *One explanation later* BT!Anne(Domino): Um. Marbles. You need to have a talk with your uncle. Like immediately. *All the Marcys turn to BT!Marcy* Marcys: ANDRIAS IS YOUR UNCLE!? C!Marcy: HE PICKLED ME! WV!Marcy: HE WAS LIKE REALLY MANIPULATIVE! CiH!Marcy: Gonna be honest no idea who Andrias is I got a tree grandpa. Marbles: Okay in Uncle's defense I do think it's a different thing seeing as we're all from Amphibia. C!Anne: Yeah no sorry this is like not relevant but I seriously can't tell if you guys are frogs or humans? Like I know it's you but my brain won't decide. *Everyone else nods but before they can continue CiH!Sasha derails it, but also somehow rerails it (im just rambling at this point help)* CiH!Sasha: Woah so how did you fuck up your eye? WV!Sasha: 'I fought herons and like died a bit.' Heron: Hah. I won against herons. WV!Sasha: 'Then how did you lose your eye?' Heron: Defending a beautiful lady from merciless bandits. Domino, calling from the pickle juice conversation: I did most of the fighting, you wuss! C!Sasha: ...I feel like I should be a part of this conversation for some reason. What about you, Goron (name is iffy but it works for now okay?) CiH!Sasha: Oh, I went up into Death Mountain without my tunic on and and it got a little toasty. I can still see fine, I just look extra tough. CiH!Marcy: Hah you swear like a rock. CiH!Sasha: And you swear like a tree. WV!Anne: Yo wait didn't you say you had a tree grandpa or something? Please elaborate more. *One tree grandpa ramble later*

sorry mates i've run out of steam uh dang why do these always get so off topic?

[uhuraisgay]

fic writer meme

ty lore @megafaunatic for tagging meee :3c

How many works do you have on Ao3?

fifty three as of today. tomorrow? who knows.... (probably still fifty three)

2. What's your total Ao3 word count?

518,435 words .... wrow.....

3. What fandoms do you write for?

historically its been all over the place but theres so much stuff rotting and dying in my gdrive that has never been posted so i feel like i have a broader actual ouvre than is represented on ao3. which is mdzs heavy at least in the past couple years

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

5. beyond all limit (wangxian i wrote for lore right after i first read the book) 4. if the story's over (moshang post-divorce get-together fic) 3. someone as good for me as you (written in 2016 for holster and ransom when i was reading check, please. LMAO) 2. at least as deep as the pacific ocean (written in 2015 in the clearest example of 'person distraught by the tragic ending of a tragedy misses the fucking point and writes a coffee shop au of achilles and patroclus after she read tsoa' ever, even bigger LMAO) 1. your name safe in their mouth (lsz gets his dad back, and other emotional adventures)

5. Do you respond to comments?

i used to try to reply to every comment i got but i stopped doing that around the same time i went to college and got more depressed. but i love reading comments and i sometimes reply if someone says something that moves me or like. asks me a question about the fic that i want to elaborate on? because i love to yap

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i'm not really good at writing straight angst i feel like it's normally like. angst with catharsis. but i wrote some explorations on grief in the past couple years that i feel like have the angst factor (what i have of you about nhs after nmj dies, and then when your beard fell out about my sweetie pie kageyama tobio in middle school after his grandpa dies)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

i have a lot of silly fluffy fics... idk i try to toe the line mostly of like. the joys and sadnesses of human experience but sometimes you just gotta fluff it up. i'll set the table, you can make the fire, which is book verse aziraphale/crowley living in a cottage and being in love, comes to mind....i love that one

8. Do you get hate on fics?

i don't think i've ever really gotten hate on a fic? i have been extremely lucky in that regard. especially since my whole ouvre from like 2014 onward is on that damn site and much of it is very cringeworthy.

9. Do you write smut?

not well!

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you have written?

i often will do like kind of a quasi-crossover kind of thing rather than a True Crossover wherein i take characters i like from one medium and plop them into the roles and places of characters i like from another medium. i did a dragon age wangxian fic where lwj was the inquisitor from da:i called we held together the fragile sky that kind of exemplifies this dynamic

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of or that anyone has ever notified me of, but i also don't look that hard. if this has ever happened, it would hurt my feelings, so please don't do it ? lol

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes!!!! and i was honored

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

not as such but i have one not-intended-for-posting fic which is basically just a transcription of jokes i have with my roommate about haikyuu characters LOL which i think counts as co-writing. she's my co-writer in spirit even if i'm the one at the keyboard

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

my answer to this changes with every new fixation i have. like right now it's kagehina. if you asked me four years ago i would have said wangxian. You Know?

15. What is a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

SO MANY...i think probably my fullmetal alchemist nie brothers au....i try not to post things until they are done and fully edited now, but that one was a whim-based fic that i lost all strength for as soon as i started thinking too hard about kagehina. i also had a fem nielan sci fi au that was vaguely based off beauty and the beast but nmj was like stuck in a ship and she thought she was its computer and that she was a program but she was actually a person....which i never posted any of except snippets on twitter and i think it was just too sprawling for my current skill level...i just was never able to wrangle it. but i am fond of it nonetheless

16. What are your writing strengths?

based on what other people have told me i would say the way i write sibling / family relationships, and while my prose is not always pretty i do think it can be pretty at times ...

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

i feel like it's often too self-indulgent even if that's what fic is for lol, and i tend to look back on fics and think, i wrote that because i had feelings about it and wanted to say it, but i'm not necessarily sure that This Character would say/do that at this point in time....idk like i fear that when i don't think about it hard enough my characterization can be weak or guided by what eye personally would do vs. what The Character would do. but some of that is because the majority of my fics on ao3 are from years and years ago and i (hopefully) have continued to improve

18. Thoughts of writing dialogue in another language in fics?

i'm picky about it but when it's done well i think it's really fun and builds so much of the world/character. i think when it's bad it's really bad. when i go about it i try to think about like, a) do i know this language myself/do i know someone who does. if the answer is no i try to keep it really minimal. b) how do people who know multiple languages approach speaking those multiple languages naturally in real life. like (IN MY EXPERIENCE) ppl don't tend to switch languages for random words mid-sentence unless those words are like, mom, dad, uncle, aunt, ect...maybe swearing if they're less familiar with one of the languages and don't know slang/swearing in it...but again when it's done well it's really good and i'm not an expert. i just can kinda tell when it feels off when i read it, if that makes sense...(it's the same way i feel about grammar lol. sometimes i can just tell it's a little Off)

19. First fandom you wrote for?

probably either fma or soul eater or the sister's grimm book series when i was in middle school. or maybe doctor who? idk i had a lot of fanfic notebooks that i have since destroyed and then regretted destroying

20. Favorite fic you have written?

at the present moment it's in these coming years my kagehina love letter but again i feel like it changes constantly. like the more i write the better i get and the more the newest/most polished thing i've written sort of Becomes my favorite just by default of my satisfaction level with it. sorry if that's a bad answer

tagging @yuebings @dcyiyou @burins @cairoscene @cafecliche @perilously sorry if you've been tagged already also if you want to do this and i didn't tag you just say i did. I'll shut up now

[aseriesofunfortunatejan]

Jan finally learns Brawler's backstory

(In 2024) (After being tortured by at least two separate people who were weird about it)

In case you don't know, two specific, major (albeit short) scenes from Brawler's backstory are presented in Chapters 16 and 25 of the manga. In case you're not interested in reading the manga, they're summarised very plainly in his History section on the Wiki.

I genuinely recommend you read the manga, however, because the way it presents parallels is... unparalleled... by the anime.

Here is my breakdown! I'll try not to spend too much time on it because I've been awful at organising my time today, but if you know me, you'll know you're in for a few long paragraphs.

So - in the first scene presented in Chapter 16, Brawler's grandpa tries to teach him the type of lesson a mama cat might also try to teach to her young. He attacks an overly confident young Brawler with a boring haircut with chopsticks, and Brawler dodges, but he's obviously jumpscared by it. The lesson is: an attacker might come even when you feel safe, such as when you're eating! It's unclear what kind of life they're living, but what's for sure is that Brawler already has a habit of fighting, and is being instructed by his grandpa. Another element I noted is that their meal is fairly sober, and the house they live in is undecorated, with cracks in the walls.

Embarrassed that he got jumpscared, Brawler considers reciprocating the attack to scare him back. Just as his grandpa had, his grips both of his chopsticks.

The next two pages aren't a continuation of this scene. Instead, the both of them have clearly aged and Brawler's hair is cooler. His grandpa is wearing an eyepatch. When he repeats the same lesson again, Brawler points out that he doesn't have eyes to spare: it's strongly implied what might have happened.

Why didn't he dodge? "He wasn't going to chicken out and lose like he did." It seems that his grandpa is teaching him to have a strong ego more so than he is teaching him survival instincts. It's not about surviving the fight, it's about winning... at having the best fight possible. His grandpa teaches him masochism... I mean, his grandpa tells him to put his life on the line for a good fight.

This is giving me a second reason not to acknowledge Shikoku Arc as canon. One other theme ruined.

Brawler has very much learned from his grandpa's pride. He grabs his hand, holding his chopsticks, and points it to his eye.

Remembering these conversations is what inspires his strong reaction to Master in the Shinkansen.

Brawler did step back and look upset in the anime. What was missing was his point of view.

Not too long afterwards, Brawler says the same thing (although differently translated, which makes sense considering the added context of the manga) he had in the anime. The difference is: we now know why he says it.

He continues with: "the two of us are fighting with our lives on the line". This is what he just recalled his grandpa telling him.

About 9 chapters later, Brawler is about to die in a fight against Master. Staring at his opponent, he remembers that first conversation with his grandpa again. The very next minute, in fact: his chopsticks are bloody, and his grandpa's eye injured. Young-boring-hair Brawler stares in shock, while his grandpa calmly instructs him to... be a masochist... I mean, enjoy getting hurt as part of his enjoyment of a fight.

"You only live once. Enjoy fights to the fullest." There is an implication here that at least I am reading into: Brawler is in pain. We later learn that his injury was slowly reopening due to Doctor's purposefully botched surgery. The injury being shown in a previous panel is that same injury. Remembering his grandpa's words, Brawler decided to ignore the pain and let it kill him.

Famously something you should avoid doing. Except if you have a uterus, in which case, give it 7 years on average before it gets diagnosed. [...]

And then, telling his old man to watch him, he fucking dies.

This was a good chapter overall, even beside the flashback - like I mentioned above, the manga does a great job of showcasing parallels. In this chapter, Boss also explains to Pupil that Executioners like Master don't differ much from Akudama.

I genuinely didn't know this was what Brawler's flashbacks were like. All I knew was that he had a grandpa some people are weird about. What I now know is that Brawler had the worst grandpa on Earth??? He's like if your boomer grandpa were proud about getting dropped from a great height rather than about drinking from the hose when he was younger.

It really seems that this man's advice actively cost Brawler's life. And I don't think the manga shies away from implying that it's not right.

Boss' speech is from her point of view and about the Execution Division. But what ties it to Brawler is not only her own comparison of Executioners like Master to Akudama, but also, Hoodlum being paralleled to Pupil.

Hoodlum and Pupil are different people with different personalities, so it makes sense that their reactions would be different either way. We know Hoodlum shuts down up until he grabs the sword to attack Pupil, whereas she was crying the entire way. But I think the fact that she's actively aware of what is happening might lead to her stronger reaction, while Hoodlum is only just guessing and unsure.

In any case, what's clear is that Brawler's grandpa's advice was dogshit and clearly biased towards his own interest. Did Brawler really carry out what he himself wanted, or what his grandpa wanted? Was he bound to end up this way, learn this lesson, regardless? What doesn't change is that this stance is selfish - and leaves the ones you care about and who care about you behind. Plus, is this fight really worth the many other fights you could have had, had you lived longer?

It wasn't just Doctor, it wasn't just Master, it wasn't just himself - all of them, plus his grandpa, killed Brawler in that moment.

("This is not a children's playground, go home"... Oh, you're trying to be a sensible grandfather figure now, shithead? Why are you alive? This sucks!!!)

Most importantly, this puts emphasis on Brawler's ego. Brawler is a man with a great ego, which we now know he was taught to have. He doesn't just happen to be the best fighter - he aims for greatness. He wants to have a very long prison sentence just like Hoodlum. [...]

Much of his circumstances are still missing. First off, why was he taught to fight in the first place? And why was he separated from his grandpa? And did he have other family beside him? (Is Akudama Drive implying that if you only have one adult guardian, you're bound to become a criminal? I'm in deep shit. /ex) His flashbacks imply a fairly humble lifestyle. We know Brawler can eat a lot - were his needs and wants not met because he couldn't afford them? It's not like the quantity he was eating had increased by the later flashback, so the humble food, compared to his liking for huge servings of meat, was probably not a personal choice. That being said, we don't know his grandpa. Maybe he wanted that for him - he clearly had a lot of influence over Brawler.

I don't think these questions need to be answered to tell a good story. I do think all of these questions would have been more interesting to tackle than whatever Shikoku arc was about, however.