#does he do this every day? wtf...
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jayjamjary · 3 months ago
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Wtf wtf wtf normally I guess I leave out in the morning before my roomate ever eats cereal breakfast or whatever but this guy just dumped the extra milk down the sink!??!?!?!?! WHAT?!?!?!?!? DRINK THAT WHAT!??!?!?!? WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT!?!??!?!?!?!?
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deadpoetsandlivinglegends · 4 months ago
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Results are in:
Scrooge outfit: Neil, Todd, and Cameron
Heart Boxers: Knox, Charlie, and Pitts
Pink robe: Meeks and Keating
I will forever be indebted to anyone who draws fanarts of them in these outfits
#I will give my life for anyone who draws mittsie in these outfits; like please can you imagine someone banging on their door at odd hours#and Meeks answering the door in a flowy pink robe; sleep not fully out of his eyes as an equally sleepy Pitts is seen behind him in heart#boxers like poets don’t even say anything because they know if they do Meeks can verbally destroy them so they don’t even attempt#plus they value their grades so they try not to piss Meeks off; but like dude the mittsie fanart would go crazy in these#and anderperry both dressing like an old Victorian couple to go to sleep is so funny to me like I can see it so clearly#and the side eyes both Cameron and Charlie would give each other at bedtime every night and before they got into bed but also I could see#them just never bringing it up until like they get in a fight in the dining hall where Cameron is trying to tell Charlie to stop throwing#his dirty clothes into Cameron’s hamper so Cameron will wash them and Charlie is denying doing this and Cameron is like ‘dude you and I#both know those are not my boxers’ ‘how do I know you didn’t steal them’ ‘you literally wore them two days ago’ ‘how do you know that’ ‘you#literally rarely wear pants around our room what do you mean how do I know that’ ‘well who knows; might’ve been yours to begin with and I#stole them so I was just now returning them’ ‘I would NEVER buy boxers that tacky’ ‘exCUSE YOU our boxers aren’t tacky’ ‘your boxers that#I’m not washing’ ‘it’s like you don’t even love me’ and then rumors start that they’re gay and both pull a face of disgust like ‘you think#my standards are THAT low; I do have some dignity’ they say in unison before turning to the other like ‘what’s wrong with me?’#and then Knox would be over there by his lonesome cause he had some random roommate rather than one of these boys as a roommate so he#doesn’t get to see any of them in these outfits nor them him in his heart boxers#keating would be in the teachers wing and they would all have to rush to a scene in the middle of the night and they would all be giving#Keating a side eye like wtf is this grown man wearing ‘John. you look… that robe’ ‘yes; what a better way to appreciate the every day but#making the every day extraordinary; sometimes we must treat ourselves to truly understand life’s meaning’ ‘and that pink shit does that?’#‘well of course; its silk Kevin.’ ‘right.’#dps#dead poets society#gerard pitts#charlie dalton#richard cameron#neil perry#todd anderson#steven meeks#knox overstreet#mr keating#the poets as…
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evilkitten3 · 2 years ago
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naruto crack au where kakashi manages to successfully drill the "never abandon your comrades" thing into team seven's heads
so when sasuke deserts naruto and sakura immediately desert with him. like he gets to the village gates and they're just waiting for him bags packed like "what took u so long we doing this or what"
he tries to get them to go back bc of course he does. "no you losers this is about me i'm going to kill my brother. also i'll have to kill my best friend for the super sharingan and you two are like the only people i talk to". but they do not listen. teamwork sasuke we will defeat your brother (OUR brother #communism) with the power of teamwork. just like kakashi-sensei said
suddenly orochimaru has to deal with three horrible little goblins with an even more codependent relationship than his old team
#naruto#team seven#orochimaru's favorite is sakura bc she's smart and respectful and gives kabuto headaches#kabuto's favorite is naruto bc he thinks he's funny#nobody's favorite is sasuke. he's fine with that tho#also sakura can still summon slugs she made a bet with tsunade ahead of time for the right to make the contract#kakashi keeps trying to get his team back but keeps approaching them one on one#which always ends in whoever he's talking to going ''i can't abandon my teammates sensei wtf''#obito is watching all of this from the bushes and laughing his ass off#the sound five live bc. nobody bothered to tell tsunade team seven had left until it was way too late#orochimaru keeps her updated tho#every time kakashi tries to sneak in and steal his kids back oro sends him back with pictures of how they're doing#''little sakura-chan is making excellent progress with chakra scalpels! you must be so proud! oh wait''#she hopes he dies#oro tells naruto who his parents are to spite jiraiya#unfortunately he does this when they're all still annoying little thirteen-year-old shitheads#so sakura and sasuke are both furious and don't talk to either of them for a day#they don't even know what they're mad about they're just Mad#meanwhile sakura's parents are happy to hear she's doing well and hope she writes soon#they don't. they don't really get the treason thing#team hebi/taka still forms ofc#it's an absolute disaster#sakura's a little sad when they finally ditch orochimaru bc she'd actually really enjoyed learning from him#like yeah he was an absolutely horrible human being but. she learned a lot!#he comes back later ofc#there's sorta an awkward moment when naruto finds out gaara got abducted and demands to go after him#sasuke: ok have fun#sakura: we're going too#sasuke: fuck#orochimaru: tell sasori i said hiiiii~ <3
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beeduoo · 1 year ago
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originnssssss who remembers origins i Loved origins
#origins smp#i heard theres been like three failed origins revivals WHAT EVEN HAPPENED i was only there for the first one😅#beeduo#otubbo#oranboo#beeduo fanart#i rewatched some origins streams a little while ago oh my god theyre SO FUNNY#DUDE DOES ANUONE REMMEBER THAT ONE STREAM I COUDLNT FIND RHIS ONE STREAM#IR WAS LIKE THE ONE WHERE TUBBO WAS SINGING SUGAR BY MAROON FIVE and they were being really Funny thay shit h#ad me CRYING in 2021 Please i swear this happened imnot crazy but also they might have been separate streams actuallu i dont rememebr its#been wayyyyyyy too long#BUT IT HAPPENED I PROMISE Sorry i've been gone for a while ive been very busy lots of Things going on went to Six flags then jad a surprise#bday party then i had to buy shoes for prom then Go to prom and also i do figure skating and am out like every day idknt have Time im sorry☹#had a crepe yesterday it was sooooo goood im like learning to drive too that shit is boring as hell my dad kept gettign 😑 bc i couldn't stop#yawning DRIVING IS SO BORING its not my fault😭😭😭😭#ok what else ohhhh. y god i locked in SO HARD for this physics essay u guys dont even knowim getting ONE HUNDRED on that trust i just really#wanted to share ok i love you bge#WAIT ACTUALLT SORRU IM LIKE REMMEBERJNG THE ORIGINS STREAMS K WAYCHED#RANBOO WAS SO FUCKING FUNNT IN THOSE STREAMS TOO LIKE I REMEMBER NIKI WANTED TO SEE THEIR BASE and tubbo was like ooh maybe we can put like#water down here for you niki we need a water system and ranwas like Do we though?I WAD WAYCHING THAT .LIKE DAMMMNNNNNN OM LIKE GIGGLING WRIT#ING THIS RIGHT NOW I CAN HEARTHE CLIP HE DID NOTTT WANT HER IJNTHEIR BASE😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#I NEED TO FIDN THAT STREAM WHERE IRS LIKE TOMMY AND JACK A D FHEHRE LOKE TALKING ABOUT DUOS AND THEN JACK SAYS THE MOST OUT OF POCKET SHIT I#VE EVER HEARD LKKE I LITERALLU HAD TK PAUSE. H PHONE AND BURST OUR LAUHJIMG MY JAW WAS ON THE FLOORRRRR DO U GUYS R EME ER WTF IM TLAKING AB#OUT IDK HOW TO FIND THESE STREAMS Oh my god u really Had to be there early 2021 that was liye the funniest era of mt life i wlild be#Tearing up from lauhjimg every day I MISS WAYCHING STREAMS LIVE CHAT WAS SO FUNNY I wishe it was archivedI WISH MORE STREAMERS KEPT CHAT ON#SCREEN i defiently understand why most didn't like Wyd when chats annouing ad hell but also Me 3 years later is interested in what the pub#lic had to say.... ok Now bye
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nexahexagon · 6 months ago
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He’s always there,,, watching,,, screaming to the void,,,
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the-somwthing · 7 months ago
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wall-eye · 3 months ago
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If you annoy people for fun, don't be surprised when people don't like you
Work rant in tags. Didn't know there was a 30 tag limit lol
#one of the people in my department is sick so we pulled a out of department coworker to do her shift today#she is !! so annoying !!#doesnt do anything right doesnt take anything seriously thinks she knows what to do better than the people whove been there daily (ME.#im not going to make sandwiches 10 minutes before the lunch rush are you kidding me)#anyway. shes got 4 grown kids and has this job to fill her time (left 40 minutes early) and specifically told the evening shift that she#makes it a challenge to annoy people. for fun.#'teehee i put the spoons away head up cause [vic] doesnt like it and [they] put it back immediately' its not a prank when it violates-#food safety. and also it is literally making more work for me. i worked 2 hours with her and im exhausted today. i only have 4 hour shifts#literally like. puts nothing in the right space does nothing correctly or finishes something in one go leaves the Strangest messes#put me on my autistic back foot (the hotcase is supposed to be the same everyday. for us AND the customers. no one knows where anything is!!#regulars come in and glance at it to see if we have their things in there and theyre just walking away cause its in the wrong spot!!)#anyway. she made me do the donut pull and didnt dump her trash and also put the oven waxpaper on the trays in the sink.#and told me to Not clean the meat slicer cause ill need to use it for sandwiches (the cooler that we put our sandwich stuff in broke 2 weeks#ago so we are low on space everywhere and are trying to keep everything to a minimum. there were 3 tubs of meat sliced AND ALSO IT WAS 10.#MINUTES. TO RUSH. IM NOT MAKING SANDWICHES CARRIE. THERES LIKE 5 ALREADY OUT THERE I MADE YESTERDAY.)#srry she like implied-asked me to make some like 3 times while i was literally cleaning her mess.#i cant work in that kitchen if every surface is cluttered i will clean it before making a Bigger Mess.#anyway. she only works over here if someone is sick enough to call out w no cover which is like maybe once every 4 months so#she doesnt know how to do things. which would be fine if she recognized that. she does the hot case so wrong yall.#its usually [burritos; stick items; boat items] [corndogs; strips; (boat items or fries)] [fried chicken; (space or fries] [bakes chicken;#special of day and fries after its gone; space/special part 2 or fries] [sweet corn; mashed potato; mac n cheese; two kinds of gravy]#its mever that when she works even tho its NEVER DIFFERENT.#today it was [baked chicken; strips x2] [baked chicken 2; special;boats?] [fried chicken; fries] [corn dogs;burritos; CORN.] [STICKS.; mac#;mashed potato; gravys]#WHY DOES SHE MOVE THE CORN. ITS ALWAYS THE CORN. EVERYTHING ELSE MOVES AROIND BUT WHY IS THE CORN BOT IN THE ROW WITJ THE OTHER SIDES.#it bothers me so much but i cant Move things cause its a mess and its hot and i have mire important things to do like CLEAN HER MESS.#ugh. anyway she talked rrally hushed to the evening shift and i thinj he reassured her that im just like this (quiet/bad at talking) and do#like her and like. lmao. i dont but she doesnt need to know that. i was too overwhelmed by figuring out wtf she was doing to figure out to#talk to her#anyway (thats the third anyway i need to stop) she called me mellow so at least my stress wasnt showing too much
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kyliafanfiction · 1 year ago
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Honestly, if I thought it might actually be possible to just... exorcise the Amy brainrot from my head and move on with my life, fic ideas unwritten, fics unread and Worm unfinished, I'm tempted to.
Not because of the brainrot itself, but because of how fucking annoyed thinking about Ward and all the Ward-era WoG shit Wildbow pulled gets me.
#Grumping#Anti-Wildbow#I just-#This guy writes this character and then proceeds with Ward and all the Ward WoG to undo literally everything that makes her interesting or#even like a narratively meaningful part of Worm#If that really was his intent the whole time than HOLY SHIT even just going off Interludes 2 and 3 he failed so fucking hard at it given hi#WoGs about Interlude 3#and like if he's that fucking bad of a writer than wtf?#or he genuinely did change his mind or overcompensate because people 'weren't getting it' and that's just even#more bullshit#and like - getting pissy at Creators for this sort of shit is common in fandom and hardly new for me but it's all still so burningly active#and I don't need this sort of negativity in my life#but I do actually enjoy a lot of the worm fics I'm reading and the fics I'm dreaming up and most days I don't really think about this shit#that much and writing fics and people reading fics I write does in fact spark joy and will give me the sort of outlet to get past all this#crap#speaking from experience#but I have to actually get there#and then the smug assholes of the fandom who get really fucking snotty about 'canon' and 'fanon' and hang off Wildbow's every word like he'#a fucking prophet as if he hasn't been wrong and inconsistent in his own WoG before#and like the worst part is he is a good writer and a compelling writer but he's quite clearly a shitty person as far as I can tell like#maybe person to person he's fine but sweet fucking jesus#I need to stop letting him and stupid asshole BNFs live rent free in my head#Kylia Writes a Novel In the Tags#A fucking trilogy even#fml
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possession1981-moving · 2 years ago
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validinsanity · 3 months ago
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I will never stop hating on small dog owners who don't train thier dogs
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prlssprfctn · 1 month ago
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Dick, tired after another session of being bullied by his own siblings: God, do we even have someone in this family who is accepting?
Tim: Well, not me and Steph, obviously
Damian: I am not in this particular competition. Perhaps Cain?
Stephanie, scoffing: Absolutely not my beautiful Cass. She judges you hard every day in my dms.
Dick, hopeful: Duke?
Damian, who had been shit-talking about others with Duke for a year now: You have a wrong idea in mind, Grayson.
Cassandra, appearing out of nowhere: Jason.
Tim, instantly protesting: No! He is like, professional hater.
Cassandra, shrugging: Does he hate things? Yes. Does he judge? No. Try admitting the most different things to him — you will see.
Everyone: ...
Everyone: On it.
Tim, eying at Jason, who sits in the Batcave during one of the missions: Jason?
Jason: Mhm?
Tim: Urgh... I fucked up. Forgot about Bart's birthday.
Jason: Okay? Just aplogise and gift him stuff.
Tim: ...Okay, wtf, since when you are so understanding?
Jason: Wtf?
Duke: Urgh, Jason?
Jason: What?
Duke: I got in the fight in school.
Jason: Well, you clearly won?
Duke: Yeah, sure.
Jason: Cool. Have fun dealing with the aftermath.
Duke: ...
Duke: ...Thanks?
Stephanie: I eat pineapple pizza and coat my watermelon with Nutella.
Jason:
Jason: ...Okay? Bon appetite?
Stephanie: !!!
Damian: I probably killed someone by the accident.
Jason: Aha. Is that a request for my cleaning services or just an information to keep in mind?
Damian: ...Second one.
Jason: Ok. Have fun.
Dick, a week after: Man, okay, you are clearly not high, I checked. What is the secret of such an angelic level of acceptance while being a hater????
Jason: I follow the Idk+Idc rule. I don't know and I don't care.
Dick: But don't you feel outrageous? At least sometimes? LIKE, MAN, WATERMELON AND NUTELLA?
Jason: I don't know. I don't care.
Jason, after a beat of silence: Unless it is Bruce. Him, I judge.
Dick: ...Of course.
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damselneedssaving · 21 days ago
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「 DON'T GET THE DOOR 」
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OLDER!CLINGY!DAMIAN WAYNE X F!READER
★ SYNOPSIS: After days of being too busy to be intimate with you, Damian's finally got you propped up on the kitchen island, sweet and like putty in his hands, when a sudden knock sounds at the door... and he absolutely refuses to let you go and answer it.
★ TAGS: damian is 18+, suggestive content, nothing too much—just making out, and a bit more, damian is physically incapable of keeping his hands off you, srsly babe wtf did you do to him, dick and jason cameo at the end
★ A/N: just some dami hating everyone but you action 🤭 enjoy trying to get him off you lmao
line divider by @cafekitsune
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Damian's gaze is heavy as it runs all over you, soaking you in with an intensity that makes you squirm on the counter, the marble cool against your bare thighs.
His hands are firm on your waist, sitting there like that's where they're meant to be—like they know no place else—as his chest moves to press up against your own, and his body stands situated right between your thighs, hot and present.
"I've missed you, Habibti," he whispers after a beat of just staring, and it comes out breathless, framed a little by disbelief, like he just can't fathom you're actually there.
You can only squirm in response, eyes ready to move to the side in all their bashful glory—when he ushers them back to him, fingers gentle against your chin.
"I've barely seen you these past few days—and now that I can, you choose to hide from me?"
You blink back at him, eyes wide and head shaking from side-to-side to convey what you can't with words, what you can't under the intensity of his gaze.
He hums, and he's so close now, so within kissing distance, that his breath fans over your face, minty and fresh, begging and pleading.
You don't even realise the way your lids grow heavy until it takes only half the time it usually does to shut them, until you're leaning forward and eager to meet him halfway as it registers to you just how much you've missed his touch.
Damian receives you with open arms, lips pressing against your own as he further pushes himself against you, hands now curling around your waist instead of situated at its sides.
All you can breathe is the scent of nature and cologne, drowning in all that is him until your head grows dizzy and your body begins to shake, until you're suffocating in heat and pounding need.
He kisses you like he's running out of time to, like at any minute, he'll be forced to pull away, hungry and desperate and left with an ache near impossible to fill.
He also kisses you like he has all the time in the world to, like he's taking in a piece of art, studying every inch until he has it etched into his mind forever.
It's too much—it's not enough—and you're left a panting mess when he pulls away, the air hot and heavy and seeping so much steam it practically fogs up your vision.
"Dami..."
He hums, lips now on your neck, having moved there as soon as he pulled away as though incapable of truly ever leaving you.
Your fingers move to card through his hair, and he groans right into your skin, just above a vein, sending a vibration straight through your body.
God, the moment is just so perfect, and you've just been so starved for attention, and everything in the world seems to just be going so right, that it feels wrong, like something will happen to ruin it all.
Something like a knock at your door.
At first, you think you're imagining it, because Damian continues to litter your skin with kisses like nothing's happened, his hands even beginning to roam beneath the hem of your shirt, touch light against your skin.
But then you hear it again, louder this time, and you're sure that it's real.
But Damian acts like it isn't.
His hands continue tracing patterns into your skin, lips painting your neck like it's one of his canvases as he worships you with all the devotion of a man begging for his life.
It's only when a third knock, even harder and louder than the former two, sounds from the door that he shows even a hint of acknowledgement, fingers digging into your sides, but not enough to hurt, your Damian would never hurt you.
"Damian!" a voice calls from the other side of the door, deep and insistent, "I know you're in there! Open up!"
"Would you be quiet?" another hisses right after, "People are looking."
You blink, pulling back a little, only for your boyfriend to chase after you.
Another knock at the door.
Damian growls into your skin just as you call softly, "Dami."
"Ignore those two idiots," he scoffs out with all the vitriol of a man wronged, one starved of something he's needed for far too long. "They'll leave eventually."
You nod, readily and easily because you don't particularly care for answering the door either. Not when he's holding you so sweet, and kissing you so right, and loving you like you're the only thing in his sight.
And you practically are with how he devours you, biting and sucking as he tastes you enough to shoot tingles down your spine and flood your veins with heat.
"Maybe he's not home," one of the two voices says, and you're just lucid enough to recognise it as Jason's.
"Oh he's home alright," the other responds, and you're quick to find that it's Dick.
But then all your lucidity washes out your veins because Damian's fingers start to crawl up your skin, and you're parting your lips to warn him with another call of his name.
"Dami—"
"Shh," he hushes you gently, and you know he doesn't mean it, soft and reverent as his hand reaches up to play with the band of your bra, lifting and snapping it back in place to send a jolt down your spine.
Your eyes dart to his, a heat pooling low in your stomach, and he simply meets your gaze with his own hooded one.
Then he moves to capture your lips again, and you're moaning low against his mouth, lips parting just a brief amount to let him in, when another huge bang slams against your door.
You pull back with a frantic, "Coming!"
Damian is already moving to try and capture your lips again, but you shut him down immediately, hands pressed firmly against his chest.
"Damian."
He growls, cursing beneath his breath in Arabic as he lingers a second longer, fingers curling against your skin. But he does ultimately let go, backing away enough to leave you room to hop off the counter, but not enough so that you can't feel the heat of him against you once you do.
And as you make your way towards the door, Damian follows right after, a shadow to his light, a knight to his princess.
A boyfriend to his girlfriend.
You swing open the door to two figures stood on the other side, both who you suspected them to be, wide-eyed and blinking as though they never thought you'd answer.
"Finally," Dick whines, lips jutted in a pout before they tug back up, flashing you one of his signature charming smiles. "Hey [Name]! Think Jason and I could crash—?"
"No."
A rush of wind flies over your face, the door to your apartment slamming shut before your very eyes to leave you dazed and a tad confused for a second.
Then a pair of arms wrap right around your waist, and that same voice that rejected the two brothers at your door is whispering right against your ear, hot and heavy, "Now... where were we?"
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evandore · 1 year ago
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well my brother must be upset with me cause hes being petty for no fucking reason
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bluastro-yellow · 1 year ago
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"I had read Homage twice and never registered that Eileen was in Spain. No one I have ever asked remembers her."
her contribution is vastly overlooked by everyone but. how do you not remember she was there. she tells him of the POUM arrests, dare I say saves his life by immediately escorting him out of the hotel they were staying at. she sends him stuff to the front. they escape together
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lunarfortune · 1 year ago
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seokjinsonlyone · 10 months ago
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even more niche boyfriend things i think bts would do
part 1 | part 2 | part 3
namjoon:
not a newborn baby but is a big proponent of the kangaroo care concept; like loves to cuddle you while he’s shirtless; him on his back you laid on top of him, skin touching skin at every possible contact point; it does it for him every time
sends you pictures of animals he finds wandering around when he’s out and about 
takes soooo many pictures of you; don't get me wrong there's a fair share of couples photos like you're definitely taking selfies together whenever y'all go out but he takes twice as many off guard pictures of you as posed ones; definitely has a pic of you during golden hour forlornly looking out a window as his lockscreen
asks you to make him a playlist and listens to it whenever he misses you even if it's really disjointed and doesn't fit his mood simply bc you made it and he's always in the mood for you <333
learns to be more gentle around you so he becomes 5-7% less clumsy when you’re around
if you went to a party together i think there’d only be like one hour max where you’re separated from each other any more than that and y’all both start getting fidgety from missing each other bc if you’re in the same space you absolutely have to be together; when you do meet back up he tucks you up underneath his arm and kisses your temple and y’all are sickly cute for the rest of the night; like enough lovey dovey pda to make someone nauseous
always amazed at the amount of stuff you manage to bring out the house; like you'll come out after him and he sees you walking towards the car, arms stuffed to the brim with water bottles and lotions and umbrellas and whatever else you deemed necessary for the day's outings, so he has to rush to help you before you drop everything; eventually gets hip to the fact that you're a a girl and you're always gonna have bunch of things and starts pre-loading your belongings so you won't have to struggle
Oblivious Boyfriend™; as smart and emotionally intelligent and mindful as he is, he's not a mindreader; like he be so focused on his feelings for you, his passions, and his work that he lowkey don't know wtf going on outside of that; so if there's something going on around you or something wrong with you or you have a problem with him you're gonna have to spell it out lest he be none the wiser
doesn't like when you watch him work out because you're more of a distraction than anything but he does like going to you straight after working out; he gets a real kick out of the way you ogle him and feel up on his biceps while he's all pumped up 
he really likes when you call him cute nicknames; joon, joonie, joonie boonie, namu like it lowkey make his heart soar; his personal favorite is joon bug you call him that and he would literally steal the moon if you asked 
seokjin:
tests out all his new recipes on you; feeds you bites to taste along the way so you're not too hungry because he's a perfectionist and it takes him extra time for him to plate it; "the presentation is just as important as the taste!"
likes when you’re in the same room as him while he plays his games; not necessarily watching him but just your company is enough; switches between focusing on the game and engaging you in conversation so you won’t get bored; would actually love it if you did take an interest in whatever game he was playing; would take his time explaining the back story of each character and their strengths and weaknesses; would start a separate game so that you could play and have you sit between his legs while he helped you with the controls
has to kiss you at least 3 times before leaving the house; once when you wake up, once while you’re going through your morning routine, and once before you leave; more kisses may be shared but any less than three and he swears his whole day is thrown off
he’s going to pick at you; there’s just no way around it it’s in his nature; he won’t do it enough to make you actually annoyed but enough that you wanna smack him around a little; which… he likes things like that
has no problem singing and dancing whenever y'all are casually listening to music but if you actually wanted him to sing for you he'd get all shy, red in the ears and neck and would have to take a couple days to practice before following through
begs you to join him for tennis practice bc he wants you two to become the next venus and serena
y’all will do that one couples trend on tiktok where they paint each other and then reveal the pictures at the end and it’s not like yours is fantastic or anything but you can tell that you at least tried; meanwhile when you see seokjin’s painting you can’t tell if you’re looking at a distorted walrus or a possessed squirrel either way it is NOT you no matter how much he insists it looks like you
stays sending you thirst traps; like whenever he looks good whether it's bc he's all dolled up for some event or he's fresh out the shower with his hair slicked back or he just sees himself in a mirror and remembers he's worldwide handsome, his phone is out, he's putting a sultry look on his face, snapping a pic, and sending it straight to you
you binge watch animes together; no one will see or hear from either of y’all for like 5 days straight, complete radio silence; and when someone finally knocks on the door they see that y’all been camped out in the living room no phone in sight on season 6 of whatever anime y’all started last friday night  
must feed you every time you meet up; like if he has not seen you eat something in the time you spend together he has not completed his boyfriend duties; even if he comes to your place he has to make sure you have at least eaten a snack; doesn't matter how much you weigh he absolutely can not have you wasting away on his watch
yoongi:
gently tucks your hair behind your ear
always offers you his arm to link when it’s cold out so y’all can share each other’s warmth; he absolutely will still be wearing slides with no socks tho and you fuss at him about it every time
lets you play in his hair; just sits there nonchalantly while you give him the most ridiculous hair styles; pig tails, corn rows, mohawks; as long as you don’t cut nothing he doesn’t care fr; takes a picture when you’re done with that big gummy smile on full display bc of how silly he looks
says he's not a big social media person but one of his favorite past times is sitting down with you scrolling down your fyp for hours; makes you send the funniest videos to him so he can watch later
you’re one of the few people that he gains energy from being around so he likes your presence even when you’re not particularly doing anything; like you just be sitting next to each other or like be hand in hand on a walk around the neighborhood not even saying anything but in his head he’s thinking about what a great time he’s having 
if you're up late at night and start feeling peckish he'll make you some snacks even if he doesn't plan on eating; still scolds you about how eating late at night is bad as he's enabling you; ends up eating with you too
he doesn't like watching dramas with you; he'll claim it's bc of the plot but really he just doesn't like how you be kicking your feet and giggling at the male leads
not the best with verbal affirmations so whenever he does go out of his way to compliment you he ends up just as flustered as you are; “you look pretty today” and his cheeks are flushed more than yours 
always preps you to bargain and gathers together all coupons before y’all go grocery shopping; “just bc i’m rich doesn’t mean i like to be ripped off” 
he's always listening to you even when it seems like he's not; you could be rambling on about something and you think he's not paying attention so you stop midsentence and be like "are you even listening to what i'm saying?" and he looks up from whatever he was doing and then repeats back to you everything you said; has a great memory in general so he remembers everything you say and do even the small things that you forget about
hoseok:
sends ‘thinking of you’ texts just to let you know when you’re on his mind
if you start dancing to a song he gets all hyped up and he’s joining you immediately; hands on your hips moving you as he pleases; it’s a club wherever you and the music are
makes you one of his little beaded bracelets that says “ur my hope”
if you fell asleep in a position that looks uncomfortable he’d gently rearrange you until he got you in a more normal position; 100% the type to carry you bridal style to bed if you fell asleep for the night on the couch 
the type to pop up at your crib with an insane amount of the most exquisite, top tier take out and you gotta try to figure out who he think eating all this; doesn't even try to fight the boujee allegations when you tease him for bringing out caviar and truffles 
always takes pics of you when he thinks you look good; like you could be running late and you’re rushing trying to get out the door but hoseok is just gonna spend a good 30 seconds checking you out while you’re fussing at him and then be like wait a minute and starts posing you; has several organized folders of you because of this labeled by genre of your look; it’s easier that way so when he’s showing people pictures of you they won’t accidentally get a peek of something meant for his eyes only
loves the idea of you becoming his family so he really likes bringing you home; warms his heart to see you getting along with his parents and his sister; sets up a group chat with you him and his sister to help y'all talk more but lowkey gets pouty when y'all do get closer and be chatting and hanging out without him 💀
if you're not already together he'll facetime you in the morning; he won't have much to say at first other than a groggy good morning; but after he comes to terms with the fact that he has to be awake and takes a couple sips of his iced americano he's his usual ball of energy sunshiny self; will have you up doing morning stretches and light calisthenics at 6:30am
every couple weeks y'all go to the nail salon together and get mani-pedis; he leaves the acrylics and jewels and glitter to you but the overall color scheme and design aesthetic for your nails match; takes like 17 pictures of your hands together to show off
loves cuddling up to you on the couch so you can play in his hair; like each time his head is resting on your chest and your hand is running through his hair lightly scratching at his scalp he swears he’s reached nirvana 
jimin:
will drag you out the house in the middle of winter to drive down to the beach and watch the sunset together; you’d be huddled up together you sat in between his legs leaning against him his arms draped around your neck pulling you into him; you’d stay there sitting in the sand even after the night settled in just talking until you were shivering and sniffling then he’d take you to a cafe to get some hot cocoa to warm up 
randomly calls you in the middle of the night bc he misses your voice; smiles the entire he’s getting scolded for scaring you bc you thought something was wrong bc he called you at 2am
kisses your forehead, nose, and lips in that order every time you part ways 
hates knowing there's other people staring at you so like if you're out together and wearing like a hoodie or something and he notices you're garnering attention he zips it all the way up and pulls your hood over your head and tightens the strings so no one can see you; in turn knows you hate the thought that other people even think of him so he pretends they don't even exist; like you can literally point somebody out and be like "omg aren't they so pretty" and he's gonna avert his eyes in the opposite direction won't even look and just be like "you're so pretty. there's only you"
number one advocate for a lazy morning; snuggles into you, his head on your chest trapping you in; looks up at you with a goofy smile and preens when you press a kiss to his forehead
squishes your cheeks in both his hands when you're being too cute for him to handle
like the true feminist he is, he supports your rights and wrongs!!; like you get into it with somebody and then tell him the story afterwards he's hyping you up the entire time telling you that you were right and what you should've done and what he would've done if he were you; he's just always gonna be on your side
riles you up just bc he likes the reactions you make when you’re irritated 
it’s tea city when it comes to you two; like whatever you know he knows and whatever he knows you know; gossiping is actually one of your favorite bonding activities; he likes to play it up and drag it out whenever he finds something out; like he’s gonna text you and be like UR NOT GONNA BELIEVE THIS!!!!! and you’ll be like WHAT and he’ll be like I HAVE TO TELL YOU IN PERSON OMG!!!! 😱 when it’s like noon knowing darn well he not getting off work until 10pm at the earliest 😭
likes to go with you when you have to “run errands” bc it’s usually just you doing girl things like getting coffee and then going to the store to buy snacks and skincare and he thinks it’s really adorable how you light up when you see small things in cute packages
taehyung:
has a series of like 12 hour logs in his phone recents list bc he stay falling asleep on facetime
makes it a point to hang out with your male friends just to assert dominance; doesn't matter if they have partners of their own or are completely uninterested in you he still wants to look them in their eye, shake their hand, and then put his arm around you to tie up any loose ends that may be dangling around
helps you pick the eyelashes out of your eye whenever one gets stuck
asks you to come over with the sole purpose of convincing you to take a nap with him; will straight up lie on the phone and tell you he wanna hang out and do this and that and then when you get over there he like let’s nap first; your cuddles just gon do it for him every time
uses kisses as bargaining chips; like if you need him to do something like idk take out the trash he's only gonna do it if you give him 3 kisses so you give him one as a down payment and the other 2 after he completes the task; (he was always gonna do what you asked but kisses make everything better)
likes to keep his hands free when he's out and about so he's always adding extra stuff to your purse; because he's always in your bag, he knows its exact content; you'll be frantically searching for your lip gloss and he'll ask what you're looking for and when you tell him he'll pull it out of some random side pocket he moved it to so he could make room for his stuff
will randomly wake up out of his sleep and call you just bc you crossed his mind; takes like 30 seconds to respond to anything you say bc he only half awake; the call lasts for like three minutes before he hangs up to go back to sleep 
as a big fan of roleplay at least once in your relationship he's gonna make y'all get all dressed up and go to a bar separately and act like strangers and he's gonna pretend to pick you up
if you sent him out to pick up period products last minute he’s the type that ask if you wanted lemon or lime flavor bc one package is yellow and the other is green 😭; alternatively would ask what’s your coochie size when he noticed the numbers on it
he’s not gonna let you win at any game you play; doesn’t matter how much you whine and pout he likes winning too much; god forbid you’re actually good at something he’s gonna try his very hardest and will even practice so that he eventually beats you; will give you all the prizes tho
jungkook:
if he gets bored while you’re asleep he’s gonna start messing with you; his favorite go to games are flicking your bottom lip until you tuck it in or start to gain consciousness and stacking cheerios on your forehead; his personal best is 9 of em 
hooks his chin over your shoulder to be nosy when you’re watching something on your phone that catches his attention
he understands that you’re not as nocturnal as he is but sometimes when you stay over at his place and he feels restless he can’t help but crave your attention; will wake you up at 4am gently with kisses so you can try some of the food he made; you’ll be half asleep with him kneeling in front of you feeding you some spicy noodles; he’ll patiently wait for you to finish chewing before he asks you if it’s good; makes you take at least one more bite before kissing your forehead and letting you go back to sleep; tucks himself up next to you about an hour later after he finishes cleaning up after himself 
you make funny tiktoks together; they never leave the drafts of course except for when he finds it particularly hilarious and sends it in the group chat 
threatens to beat up anyone who upsets you; like you tell him a story about someone who was upsetting you at work and his first response is "bring them to me. i'll take care of it"; and lord don't let someone get carried away at a club or something like if a guy starts hitting on you and won't take no for an answer before you can even tell them off he's already at the scene one shove away from being breaking news on every media outlet in the world
gets pouty when you have a night out without him but he understands the need for balance so doesn’t put up too much of a fight; his only stipulation is that if you can’t make it home on your own or your friends can’t drop you off that you always always call him; the thought of you getting into some randos car late at night when you’re not even mentally there all the way sends chills up his spine; he can’t sleep unless he knows you’re at home safe and sound anyway 
doesn't consciously have a preference for how you dress like he thinks you look good in whatever but you in a dress or a skirt itches a particular part of his id that would have carl jung doing backflips; like whenever you pop out in a dress or a skirt he's coming up to you and giving you a kiss on the lips while his arms wrap around your waist and 10-30 seconds later they're dropping down and his hands are toying with the ends of your garment and grazing your thighs underneath it; it just does it for him every time
you're his safe place <333; he goes through periods where you're the only person he wants to see; he will scare you half to death like you'll get off work and go home and you hear all this noise and whole time it's him in your kitchen making sandwiches for lunch; will make up for scaring you by tucking your face into his neck while his arms are wrapped tightly around you so he can breathe you in and then cupping your face and giving you kisses; you're his baby
you have matching hyperfixations; like one of you will get into something and won’t shut up about it and then being the supportive partner you are whenever you’re on social media you send the posts you stumble across to them; but then the algorithm picks up on it and the content keeps popping so often that you actually start being entertained by it too; then y’all won’t shut up about it and have inside jokes and no one ever knows what y’all are talking about bc it’s so deep down into the referential millennial dadaism
gets offended if you’re walking side by side and not touching in some way; like if you start walking ahead of him or something he’s gonna clear his throat very pointedly and when you look at him like ???? he’s gonna look at you like you’re stupid and pull you into him where you belong 
a/n: as promised she is back 🫡 thank you to everyone who encouraged me to repost 💕 pls continue to be kind my mental state is probably worse than it was before LOL
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