#does this count as a vent post...

[noclosertoheavenmp3]

When you realise you dont exist to people when you're not with them: Oh mein gott! Ich bin ein NPC geworden!

[ohhalazia]

ʏᴏᴜ'ᴠᴇ ɢᴏᴛ ᴍᴇ ɪɴ ᴀ ᴄʜᴏᴋᴇʜᴏʟᴅ

☆ seonghwa in wonderland symphony no. 9 vs ’chokehold’ by sleep token ☆

[chibishortdeath]

I was at one point gonna make an actually colored nice finished drawing for this, but I’m not feeling it and the trend will probably be completely dead by the time that I do if it isn’t already ugh. So you get doodle Miku now :3!

Anyway uh weird middle of absolutely nowhere in the rural US Midwest Miku. I’ll mini rant about it a little bit under the cut 👍

I literally had to look up my own culture for this cause I couldn’t think of anything 💀💀💀💀💀. Especially not anything that actually applies to me, if that makes sense. Minus the fishing pole, this is the closest to my current experience I could get. Her expression is very reminiscent of the experience of being out here tbh.

Apparently ranch dressing is a thing???? I didn’t know cause I really don’t like ranch. Same with casseroles. Fishing is a local hobby, but I don’t have a fishing license and don’t like being around water. So is fixing old cars, but I’m not strong enough to do any of that. There isn’t a consistent accent or slang here, it’s just a bunch of stuff from everywhere else. Not really distinct clothing. A couple bands are from nearby states, but they’re not associated with them much. Uh some sports teams I guess. I don’t watch sports. Everywhere for miles looks the same cause it’s all corn and closest place to do anything is in a big faraway city and involves spending money you probably don’t have and shouldn’t.

There’s not a whole lot tbh.

Idk, this whole experience was basically “wow Miku around the world? So cool! I wanna draw Miku :D!!!! Oh hey wait, where I live is very bleak and bland actually—“ 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

[transgendercastiel]

I’m so serious you can say as many fuck jkrs as you want but you’re still supporting a woman who is steadily endangering the lives of so many queer and trans people everywhere. You can’t death of the author someone who is gaining influence and impacting lives more every day. Even understanding the prejudices baked into her work and navigating them in a conscientious way won’t stop her from funding political parties. She’s been extremely open about how she perceives ANYONE who still engages with the HP franchise as a supporter of her views. How can you actively choose a media that you enjoy over a trans woman’s right to exist within society??

[claperpip]

i drew some turtles to express how i’m currently feeling

spoiler alert: i’m doing amazing rn

[coolguyonemillion]

Another great day of being neurodivergent

[toashesireturn]

absolutely insane take from the priest this past sunday but apparently he doesn't consider marriages only carried out at the courthouse and not through the church as real marriages so if you got married and didnt get a specifically catholic marriage then having sex is still a sin. absolutely baffling take along with the rest of the purity culture bs he was spouting

[methylphenidate-already-taken]

Bluh back to prey mode. Tired of people commenting on my face or my outfit, even if it’s well intentioned. I don’t care if you think I’m going to be too hot in this shirt. It doesn’t matter if I look sad this is my face let me do my fucking job.

Stomachs don’t do that. They go grrr and burgble and it doesn’t matter how you present yourself as long as you taste good and can give a decent belly rub or be a nice weight.

And no one Perceives you

It’s your own private room

Can be whoever the fuck I wanna be in tummy

[vamgumi]

gonna be honest; if i was at newgrounds hq, i would be scared and have a sudden onset of dysphoria and envy

[nyuheartbreak]

having social anxiety SUCKS!!!!!! I WANT TO INTERACT WITH PEOPLE WHO ENJOY THE SAME THINGS I DO!! BUT I END UP QUIVERING AND SHAKING LIKE A LITTLE WET CAT!!!! im just a wittle guy.... im only one apple tall.... the struggle is very much real

[annahanover]

quincy was so real for all of litany of the martyrs

(i heard the line "sink my shame into my skin", blacked out and made this)

[zluty-spendlik]

I am currently healing from a shoulder surgery. Which kinda sucks ass even from a cis point of view, but it also surprisingly gives me a lot of dysphoria - and im not happy about it. So have a list of things that SUCK

an obvious one but i cant wash myself - i require assistance. and BOY OH BOY is that bad for my mental health. trying hard not to throw up everytime i gotta take a shower. 0/10 has me avoiding hygiene and now i have a rash and acne

passing doesnt happen anymore- why? cause i cant even wear a bra so any kind of binding is impossible (not to mention the fact that im not allowed to get a binder bcs of my arm) plus my gigantic boobs are now super visible because of the orthesis i gotta wear

i go from doctor to doctor and hearing my deadname called out multiple times in front of a lot of ppl is uncomfortable

my orthesis is bright purple/pink. not to link a color to a gender but its really not helping

family members get sappier when talking to me so being reffered to as "their poor little girl" is f u n

thanks for listening to my bitching about life i do appreciate it. and im sorry to the disabled trans folk who deal with this on the regular, its honestly really devastating

[gothkurusu]

i dont think a child can beg for death at 6 and come away believing in God still

[sweeneydino]

Skip if you don't wanna hear someone ramble about themselves lolol

Sometimes, I feel like my art is too messy, unappealing, and lazy... But then I remember that it's okay to just draw for fun and that I don't need to appeal to people anymore.

It's really hard for me to get things done since it's been hammered into me that things need to be perfect and if I just can't make it perfect no matter how hard I try, I just ignore it. Hide it. Push it under the rug along with all the other unfinished projects because looking at it just makes me feel embarrassed and ashamed.

Even when I get it finished, I feel it's still not enough, and the thought of people hating it when I tried my hardest to complete it and make it perfect makes me feel like I failed them as well.

The problem is that I know that none of that matters. I know that I'm talented, I know that I don't need to make things perfect, I know that it's okay for things to be unfinished and that I don't need to hide my projects, I know that I don't need to please everyone and that everyone has their own opinions. Yet I just can't stop thinking about it. I can't stop worrying about it. I can't stop thinking that what I do isn't worth as much as what I could do.

But really, that's just my inferiority complex lmao. I'm going to try to complete what I want to (aka. The rvb animation then maybe the LME Chapter) cause I know I want to do that.

Oh BTW, the rant is over lol welcome to my mind bozo. Now you see how much school fucked me up LMAO

WIAT DOES THOS MEAN IM A LEO KINNIE?! /GEN

[phoenixyfriend]

[extreme frustration] I wanna move back to the city

[total-drama-brainrot]

Every time I open my google docs I think to myself "this time I'll write something, at least a couple hundred words of something," and every time without fail I just chew on the bars of my enclosure and write nothing like the caged cowardly beast I am.