#flaw: what if i see her there it would be awkward and i would seem like a fucking dick (which i would be. this is a dick move)

[computer-boy]

me giving advice: 'honestly just say what you mean! being honest is important in relationships'

me when i have to be honest and say what i mean:

[meazalykov]

nobody's type

sydney lohmann x reader

summary: people wonder why you don't want to make the first move..

warnings: insecurities, overall sadness

you stand at the edge of the pitch, the crisp air nipping at your skin as the sun dips below the horizon, casting the bayern munich training ground in a soft, golden glow. 

the stadium lights flicker on one by one, their harsh brightness chasing away the twilight shadows. 

training has ended, and most of your teammates have already made their way inside, but you linger, your feet rooted to the spot as your gaze settles on sydney. 

she’s the last to leave, her laughter ringing out like music as she jokes with a few others– tuva and pernille– who stayed behind. she looks so at ease, so effortlessly beautiful, that it makes your chest tighten with something achingly familiar—a longing that you’ve carried in silence for far too long.

it’s not that you don’t want to talk to her. it’s that you can’t. every time you think about approaching her, the words you want to say dissolve on your tongue, replaced by the bitter taste of insecurity. 

sydney, with her easy confidence and radiant smile, seems like she belongs in a world far removed from yours. sometimes you wonder how you ended up on the same team as her. she’s someone who could have anyone she wanted, someone who would never look twice at someone like you. at least, that’s what you’ve convinced yourself.

after transferring from spurs to bayern munich in 2023, you found a bit of relief. you’ve always struggled with this feeling of inadequacy, this deep-rooted belief that you’re not attractive enough, not interesting enough, not enough in any way that matters. 

you had confidence in your football ability as a striker– but still— you’re awkward and quiet, always feeling out of place even among people who know you best. you’ve never quite managed to shake the feeling that you’re somehow less than everyone else, that the flaws you see when you look in the mirror are just as obvious to everyone around you.

the idea of someone like sydney seeing you—really seeing you—fills you with a fear so intense it’s paralyzing.

so you keep your distance, blending into the background, watching her from afar like you have for months now. 

you’ve learned to be careful, to avoid letting your gaze linger on her for too long when she’s nearby. but even then, it’s like your eyes are drawn to her, seeking her out without you even realizing it. 

you watch the way she laughs, the way her eyes light up when she talks about something she’s passionate about, the way she moves with a grace that seems effortless. and every time you do, that same painful ache settles in your chest, a constant reminder of everything you want but can never have.

you’ve spent countless nights lying awake, staring at the ceiling as your mind replays every interaction you’ve ever had with her. you analyze every word, every glance, every smile, searching for some hint that maybe, just maybe, she feels the same. 

but then the doubt creeps in, the voice in your head reminding you of all the reasons why that’s impossible. you’re not good enough for someone like sydney. you’re too plain, too shy, too broken. and so you push the hope away, bury it deep down where it can’t hurt you anymore, even though you know it’s still there, waiting to resurface the next time you see her.

the sound of footsteps approaching pulls you from your thoughts, and you glance up to see georgia walking toward you. 

she’s one of the few people who seems to notice when you’re struggling, and even though you appreciate her concern, it also makes you feel exposed, like she can see all the things you’re trying so hard to hide.

“y/n,” she says softly, coming to a stop beside you. “you know your crush on sydney is pretty obvious to everyone, right?”

your heart skips a beat, panic flaring in your chest. “what? no, it’s not… i mean, it’s not like that,” you stammer, the words tumbling out in a rush as you try to deny it. 

but georgia just gives you a look, one that says she knows exactly what’s going on.

“it’s okay,” she says, her voice gentle but firm. “but, y/n, you’re selling yourself short. sydney likes you. you’re attractive and she sees that but she’s been waiting for you to make a move.”

the words hit you like a punch to the gut, disbelief washing over you. 

you shake your head, a bitter smile tugging at your lips as you try to process what she’s saying. 

“there’s no way she could like me. i’m… i’m not enough. not for someone like her.”

georgia’s expression softens, her eyes full of sympathy and frustration. “y/n, you’re more than enough. you’re caring, talented, and honestly, anyone would be lucky to have you. but you keep convincing yourself that you’re not worthy of love, and that’s not true.”

you want to believe her, you really do. but the voice in your head—the one that’s been there for as long as you can remember, whispering that you’re not good enough, not pretty enough, not worth anyone’s time—drowns out her words. 

you look away, your gaze drifting back to sydney, who’s now slinging her bag over her shoulder, ready to head inside. the idea of walking up to her, of telling her how you feel, seems impossible. 

you’ve spent so long building these walls around your heart, convinced that no one could ever love you for who you really are, that the thought of tearing them down is terrifying.

“what if she doesn’t feel the same?” you whisper, the fear creeping into your voice. it’s the fear that’s been holding you back all this time, the fear that if you let her in, she’ll see all the things you hate about yourself and turn away.

georgia sighs, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. “you’ll never know unless you try. but, y/n, you’ve got to stop tearing yourself down. you’re incredible, and it’s time you start seeing that.”

her words resonate with you, but the insecurities that have rooted themselves in your heart are stubborn. they cling to you, wrapping around your thoughts like vines, choking out any glimmer of hope. 

you want to be the person georgia thinks you are, the person who’s brave enough to take a chance, but every time you try to take a step forward, the doubts pull you back. they remind you of every time you’ve been overlooked, every time you’ve been hurt, every time you’ve convinced yourself that you’re not worthy of love.

you watch as sydney disappears through the doors, the opportunity slipping through your fingers once again.

you can feel georgia’s gaze on you, a mix of concern and sadness in her eyes, but you can’t bring yourself to meet it. instead, you stay silent, trapped in the fear that has held you back for so long, wishing you could be someone different—someone who could believe in themselves, someone who could believe that they’re worthy of love.

as the last traces of daylight fade and the stadium lights cast their artificial glow across the field, you turn to follow your teammates inside. the weight of your unspoken feelings, of your unfulfilled desires, settles heavily on your shoulders, and you can’t help but wonder if you’ll ever find the courage to break free from the chains of your own self-doubt. 

for now, all you can do is hope that one day, you’ll find the strength to see yourself the way georgia does, the way sydney might if you ever gave her the chance. 

but until then, you’ll keep your distance, hiding behind that brick wall you’ve built, afraid to let anyone meet the real you.

my master list is here if you want to read more fics <3

[chaosandmarigolds]

cztery 🤍 of EMS Au thingy!! (I seriously need a name)

summary: Simon Riley is finding himself utterly in love with the newest paramedic on base, unfortunately he had the social skills of a five year old. fem reader!

Mary pats your shoulder as you stand in the briefing room, sure you had to give speeches and pathetic ice breaker introductions but this felt so…odd. Wearing what you assumed would be your new uniform, your home country patch on your arm along with the Star of Life proudly above it. Your blue EMS pants traded in for black tactical pants- not all that different, but much heavier. Beside you Mary stood, wearing a set of scrubs that looked oh so comfortable.

“And that’s Captain Price, he…well they’re all your boss but you can boss them around- it’s great.” She whispered in your ear with a little laugh.

The meeting you had with the Captain had been brief, short but you assumed he was kind. However that may be a flaw within yourself, as you always thought everyone was kind until proven not. So you nods, “Is he kind?”

Mary shrugs, “As long he’s gotten his cup of joe and a cigar.”

“that’s awful for him.”

“You can fight him if you want, waste of time and breath though-“ her words faltered off as he motioned for you to come forward and she gives you a little shove.

Your steps were calculated, slow, the boots they had given you were a half a size big and they weighed about the same as your EMS ones- as they were military grade, however at the least those fit. The reason you chose this profession is that you didn’t freeze, you didn’t get scared, but in that moment you felt everything in your crawling. By the time you were able to adjust you were already up front and apparently the captain had already given his whole spew on how amazing of a medic you were, all eyes were on you.

His eyes were on you.

And what the fuck was he-

if your face blinking suddenly to the man who rightfully looked terrifying wasn’t a good message that you were confused, you’re stammered response to the captain asking if you had anything to say would. “Uh, yeah, um, l-like,” you couldn’t tare your eyes away, it was like a weeping angel, look away and it would ruin you, however with a shuddered breath you go on, “like the captain said, I’ve been in this profession since I was 18 and I am immensely grateful for the opportunity to aid you.” —

Mary spun around in the chair, looking over the charts, watching you as you laid face down on one of the cots. “Gonna suffocate, Stitch.”

With a sniffle you turn your face to look at Mary, “I made a fool of myself, I ought to suffocate- death is kinder.”

“ought?” Mary laughs and then stands, grabbing your wrists to stand, “Jesus go back to bridgerton you drama queen, cmon, up she goes.”

A snarky remark was on the tip of your tongue when the door opened, the commotion of the hangar was hidden behind the steel doors, so as they opened the roaring noise came inside, and only for a moment behind they slid back shut. However you wished they hadn’t opened in the first place, because there stood the monstrous thing that caused your humiliation. Black gear, towering above any normal human and there sat on his face was a skull mask, as if it were some holiday.

Mary, however, seemed unfazed, “Jesus Christ, knock first! We coulda been indecent.”

The thing made a grunting noise in response walking forward and lightly nudging her to the side until it was just you and him, he was human. You assumed. As he did have eyes, eyes that looked like they were tearing you apart.

“Didn’t have the chance to have a proper meeting, Lieutenant Simon Riley,” he took your hand, forcibly at that- as you as it squeezing your wrist (bad habit, you would check your pulse when stressed), “At your service.”

If you could see Mary’s face it would be utterly flabbergasted and shock.

“Lieutenant….Riley?” You echo the name again, not bothering to pull your hand away because A- you didn’t think he would let you. That thing was the awkward man you had picked up last night? “Oh! I am so sorry, I um…” you let out a breath, “I didn’t recognize-“

“ T’s normal. Have a Good day.” Just as quickly as he left he had spun on his heel and left, leaving you standing perfectly still and Mary in some shock.

She lets out a laugh and looks to you, “Maybe we are in Bridgerton.”

You give her a look, a frown evident on your face.

(annnd that’s it :) )

[alottiegoingon]

but i'm a cheerleader

jackie taylor x fem!reader

summary: where reader is a cheerleader and jackie taylor is the football captain

warnings: jackie being too obvious and reader too oblivious, characters are aged up, 90's but no homophobia cause its pride month and bc i can, really cheesy and lots of fluff, not proofread

a year ago, when you made the decision to try out for the cheerleading team, you had no inkling of the repercussions that would follow. you were uncertain if cheerleading was the right thing for you, especially considering the many sexist comments aimed at the girls. yet, it would look quite good on your college application.

neither extremely popular nor a complete loner, you were content with your close-knit group of friends. however, everything shifted once you joined the team. suddenly, you found yourself the center of attention in the hallways, drawing looks of both amusement and envy, a situation you still hadn't fully adjusted to.

one person in particular seemed more entranced by you: jackie taylor. the football team captain constantly had her eyes on you. no matter where you were—be it the cafeteria, by your locker in the morning, or during class—you would eventually see her watching you, prompting you to quickly look away after making eye contact.

thinking it couldn’t get any worse, you were stunned to find jackie gazing at you from the bleachers during cheerleading practice. you nearly caused the entire pyramid of girls to collapse, resulting in numerous angry stares from the others and a lecture from the coach.

you were starting to suspect that there was something wrong with your face!

⚽︎

"this is getting really weird, i swear, tai," you blurt out as soon as you sit down beside your friend at lunch. after setting your tray on the table, you take a sip of orange juice and tune into your friends' discussion.

"you're overthinking it," your friend, van, steps in, swiping an apple from your tray, "it's jackie. she's harmless."

"right! except every time i look at her, she's staring right back at me. maybe she just hates me," you reply, trying to retrieve your apple but getting a slap on your hand instead.

"hate you?" lottie scoffs, "she's like butt-crazy for you. i bet she writes your name with hearts all around it. no wonder she's terrible at french."

that was an actual good argument. jackie was really bad and hearing her attemps of speaking french was torture. still, it would make absolute zero sense. jackie taylor was popular, stunning and smart and the fact that she was the captain only added to that. she was probably memorizing your flaws to make fun of you with her friends.

⚽︎

seeing your coach step onto the field with coach martinez, the one in charge of your friend’s, and jackie’s, football team, made your heart sink. you’d experienced this before, back when the schedule became so tight that they had to combine cheerleaders and jocks.

a really, really, really bad idea.

the field was huge, yet it still felt too small to avoid jackie’s piercing glare. the worst part wasn’t your constant stumbling and tripping over your own feet and the others', but the relentless urge to look back at her.

from the other side of the field, the girls’ taunts directed at jackie reached your ears, and you knew it was because of you. you weren't the only one to notice her stares.

“careful not to slip, jackie,” van teased, their breathy and tired voice not hindering them from poking fun while playing on opposite teams for practice. she chased jackie, trying to swipe the ball while gesturing to the ground.

“what? where?” jackie stopped and looked down, not wanting to slip in front of you, giving van just enough time to snatch the ball.

“on your own drool,” their joke made the entire team laugh, and even from a distance, you could see jackie’s face turn red, speechless.

what a dweeb, you thought, even if you were also smiling at the oddly funny moment moment.

⚽︎

despite all the teasing and awkward moments, you couldn't deny that jackie's constant attention was doing a number on your nerves. you couldn't decide if you liked it or not, if she hated you or not, if you should confront her or not. one way or another, she wasn't discreet at all.

in the very next saturday, your phone rang with tai's voice, inviting to a party. you hesitated for a moment, maybe a party was just what you needed to get your mind off things but, at the same time, it would be too naive of you to imagine that the thing you were fighting to avoid wasn't going to be in there as well

as you arrived at the place, you noticed the usual crowd already mingling. music blared, voices echoed, and the familiar scent of pizza, soda and alcohol filled the air. a very weird mix, you'd say.

you tried to relax, but your eyes instinctively scanned the room, searching for jackie. it didn't take long to find her. she was in the corner with a group of friends, a jacket draped over her shoulder and a pretty dress catching your eye. but you didn't want to cross her way, at least not now.

"someone's looking at you," lottie's voice linger in your ears, scaring you away from all the jackie taylor's thoughts inside your head.

"hi, lot," you ignore her words, not daring to look in the opposite direction, "i don't know what you're talking about."

"oh, come on, don't be so boring. jackie’s been staring at you all night."

you rolled your eyes, trying to focus on your drink and the conversation around you, but the weight of jackie's gaze was impossible to ignore. you stole a glance in her direction, only to find her quickly looking away, her cheeks tinged with a faint blush.

"seriously, what's her deal?" you muttered, more to yourself than anyone else.

lottie chuckles, "she likes you, duh. everyone knows it except you."

before you could respond, your other friends joined your little circle, a mischievous glint in their eyes. "so, are you finally going to talk to her or just keep pretending you don’t notice her staring?"

you sighed, feeling cornered. "I don't know. what if she hates me?"

"you are so complicated," tai groans, arm resting over van's shoulder, "just go find out!"

with a deep breath, you decided to take their advice. you just had to be confident.

instead of walking straight to jackie, you made your way over to the drinks table, trying to appear casual. she was close by and you figured grabbing a drink might be a discreet way to approach her. if it was too awkward, another word for 'if you were too much of a coward, you could just back off.

as you reached for a cup, your hands shook slightly. not only you had accidentally knocked over a few cups but also spilled soda all over the counter and the floor. the noise drew everyone's attention, including hers.

great, you thought, just what you needed.

before you could react, jackie stepped in, grabbing some napkins to help you clean up. her proximity made your heart race even more.

"you okay?" she asked, her voice gentle and concerned, wiping the counter around you. at least she wasn't judging you.

"yeah, thanks," you mumbled, feeling your cheeks burn. you could barely talk or breath at that moment, too stunned it even took you an extra second to help her clean up your mess.

noticing your jitter, as you both cleaned up, jackie glanced at you. "this party's pretty wild, huh?"

you offer her a nervous grin as she hands you a clean cup. "right, i guess people really like the weekends."

"absolutely. and they're probably too stressed with ms. jamison class. four pages in a day? that woman crazy," jackie's gaze softened as she glanced at you, attempting to ease the tension between you.

"what about her hair? she looks like she's stuck in the 70's," you added, feeling a peculiar flutter in your stomach as a tender giggle escaped from her lips.

the two of you stood there, the awkwardness lingering in the air like a heavy fog as the sound of your laughter slowly faded into silence.

"i gotta say, though, this wasn't what i had in mind when i decided to come here tonight," you admit, reaching a hand to grab a drink, being much more careful this time.

she looked up, her eyes locking onto yours. "and what was your plan?"

you hesitated for a moment, then blurted out,"honestly? trying to dodge you and those pretty eyes of yours that seem to follow me everywhere."

a look of surprise flashed across jackie's face, her eyebrows shooting up and her eyes widening briefly before she couldn't hold back a snicker.

"it's not funny, jackie," you interrupted her giggle,"why do you keep staring at me all the time? do you hate me or what?"

as your confusion amused her further, her grin widened. could she be any more obvious? "hate you? no, not at all. It's the opposite, actually."

you frowned, puzzled. "what do you mean?"

drawing nearer, jackie's gaze held an earnestness that sent a flutter through your chest. "i like you. a lot," you stole a glance downwards, observing her fingers twisting nervously. she seemed as jittery as you now. "i just didn't know how to tell you. and I guess I was too scared to find out if you felt the same."

her confession left you at a loss for words for a moment, this wasn't something you had prepared for. "so, you... like me?"

jackie nodded, a shy smile tugging at her lips. "yeah, i do. i thought i was being clear about that."

it all fell into place in an instant—the lingering looks, the nervousness, the way she seemed to be everywhere you were. feeling a warmth spread through you, you couldn't help but smile back. "i gotta say, that explains a lot."

jackie's laughter echoed softly, easing the tension in the room. "sorry, i just didn't know how to handle it."

you paused for a moment, gathering your thoughts. confident enough, you spoke up, "maybe we can figure it out together."

jackie's eyes lit up with enthusiasm. "i'd really like that."

[blood-grove]

//body horror, monster! 141 + reader , death, gn!reader

other; c/n = callsign

a/n: idk how the military works neither do igaf much also this story was not planned this was just something i needed to get out of my system do nto expect it to be good

Shapeshifter!Reader whos always since they were a kid felt itch that there skin was ready to shed and peel like a snake, Who always felt like there body wasn't right had to be perfect flaws and all because that was human.

But they weren't human, weren't hybrid either.

The first time they had ever shifted they were eleven there Father in one of his moods again taking it out on there poor mother.

Something inside them itched at that moment hearing her cries there old dog bite injury felt like it was on fire now as they itched and scratched at it till the skin gave way giving the breathing room for transformation.

The next time they open there eyes they were being kicked there Mother sobbing as she screamed.

Father laid dead mauled beyond recognition.

Did you do that?

Why was she screaming at you?

You were kicked into the foster system the next day narrowly avoiding Juvenile detention your mother had given her last bit of gratitude by explaining to the police that you were defending her you thought she'd praise you after the police left.

You were packing your clothes that night.

You got a DNA test when you arrived due to your mothers alibi to the police.

Human.

They figured it too your mother being clearly traumatized and you sudden violent act of self defense could have made her see anything at moment.

Still didnt explain the injuries that only a dog could cause.

You were 15 when you had a good grasp on what you were.

By 18 you were barely you anymore picked pieces from other peoples faces and bodies till you felt like you looked normal.

By 19 your mother had passed the news reached you slow and the grief went slower.

By 21 you've already been in the military for a while now, If that means with a new face and body each time some higher up sticks there nose into your business then so be it.

Shifting from human to human was easy the more you practiced it.

More harder things like non-humans and animals were doable but animals were getting easier and easier.

You've tried been a K9 once didnt work out for long.

You've had a few nice call signs.

Few you quickly forgot.

[c/s]

Thats been nice to be called recently.

Oh.

Right.

You should focus your meeting your new task force.

Right.

We should focus.

Woof.

Heh.

Its been a few days and wow these guys were something.

Did you mention they were monsters?

Not in a negative way of course.

But getting to know them while they were around base was nice.

Gaz you felt was the easier to get to know the harpy felt open, Talked about how they've never had a human on the team before.

Nice.

Threw Gaz you got to know Soap, You felt like the man was holding back the calm energy around him felt forced at times as the days past both of them seemed to get to know you better and you got to know them better as well.

As for the Captain and Lieutenant you were honestly nervous,

Price had a welcoming aura to him his voice gruff and firm you warmed up to him soon enoug.

Ghost?

You tried.

And shuffled away every time he looked at you.

He noticed.

He noticed?.

You eventually did warm up to Ghost!

You realized he wasn't glaring at you for once and tried to talk to him it was..awkward to many silences but it was a conversation.

So you and him were okay.

Were you okay now weeks later slowly making your place into the team?

No.

You were itching beyond belief this wasn't a good sign—

Actually you didn't even know what kind of sign this was.

You had all just gotten back from a particular rough mission a few more injuries than you all would like you got a few stitches in your arm and every since you could just feel them moving.

Being shifted around stubbornly as if they were a dam in a river.

You couldn't do that here.

You were in the confines of your own room but what if one of them walked in?

Would they report you?

Get you kicked for the military?

Maybe if you could just shift slightly enough to easy the unease under your skin.

The sound of cracking bone was sure to grab attention.

But surely you could just pass it off as stretching?

You could not pass it off as stretching and you were currently hiding in the rafters near sobbing.

Gaz had came in to check on you and caught you half shifted you panicked and lunged at him or the door you couldn't remember you were pretty sure one of your bones were jutting out of your skin as it readjusted into place.

You didn't hurt him.

You were just hoping you could calm yourself enough to shift into something smaller and run away shift into a new person new age try again at childhood maybe?

Maybe you panicking too much?

There also monsters they'd understand?

You didn't mean to lie about what you were.

You just.

The fear of the unknown paralyzed you to afraid of what'll happen what people will think.

You know you could be a threat.

Someone able to take face and shape of anyone?

You could understand if you were saw that way.

But you didn't want to be seen that way.

Every since your mother stared you down in fear not admiration not even shock.

Fear.

You knew you could never let someone look at you that way again.

Not someone you cared about.

Maybe if you hid away long enough they'd forget.

Memories fade.

Faces fade from recognition.

But that's all what you wished what have happened.

Now you were in a awkward stare off with Gaz not to subtly watched your arm pop and snap back into place along with your head.

"I see I should have knocked.."

"Yeah you should have."

A voice of not your own replied.

You hated when your body was out of sync.

You were using the wrong voice again, rearranging your own brain and vocal cords was odd.

Odder when one of your new teammates watched.

"Are- Are you okay?-"

"No" Ghost's voice replied.

"Oh..I-..Er..Do you..need a medic I.."

"No" Your own voice replied finally.

"Can you please leave..My ribs are still not in place and I doubt you'd want to see how that works."

He left.

Probably to tell Price rather then not wanting to see you basically play with your own rib cage like tuning a piano.

a/n; idk where this was going i did not plan this out i just wrote it on a whim

[blood-orange-juice]

I suddenly groked why Childe's friendship with the Traveler is important to me. It makes him look more inhuman.

Same with his attachments in general. It all looks so sweet on the surface but this is *not* how humans handle attachments.

Humans are awkward, and afraid to admit they like someone, and they want reciprocity, and they are careful about how a new person will affect their life. They are very cautious about placing their trust in someone even if they like them. They often lie for the sake of maintaining the relationship.

And then there's this guy who loudly declares you a friend the moment he starts liking you enough, expects nothing in return and seems to trust almost blindly (personally, I think it's calculated risk rather than that, but it still removes the usual weight of trusting someone). Who is honest and straightforward in ways that don't really benefit him. And it's not exactly hero worship (he has that towards Skirk and Capitano and we know it looks differently), he just sees someone like himself in the main character.

His other relationships (siblings and Her Majesty) could have been interpreted in multiple ways but his attachment to the Traveler establishes those as genuine and more on the warm side too.

(and more weird)

We also get reminded that he isn't nice even when he likes a person, he still has his weird ideals and obligations and doesn't compromise on those.

If he was a brooding loner or someone more sociopathic in his approach it would be too easy to clock him as a traumatised kid or at least a flawed human. The way he relates to the Traveler very clearly establishes him as more than that.

I've also seen takes on how he doesn't really love his siblings, he just wants to be the best in everything and that includes being the best older brother. That would be awfully human, too, I think.

It's a subtle distinction, fae beings can be obsessed with beauty and perfection but not with being the best. A desire to be the best is a narcissistic dynamic, it's painfully human and rooted in insecurity.

(he says and shows multiple times how he doesn't seek narcissistic fuel at all, even on an average human level. he seeks improvement but doesn't really care about winning or impressing other people

he's also committed to doing the best he can without being worried about perfection in the current moment)

He loves them dearly and he's doing what's best for them as he understands it, but it doesn't matter whether they love him or whether anyone else including them thinks he's a good brother.

So we once again get a lovely paradox with him. Everything is the opposite of what it seems.

Could be read as a different form of trauma or just arrogance, of course, but also it connects him to other Abyssal beings (Elynas, Durin, Caribert to an extent too. one could say Enjou as well). Horrors of Teyvat love with no reservations but also it doesn't mean what you think it means.

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #18

Operation: Birthday Takeback

Dev's birthday!! Look at him. For some reason, the fact that his drones are here in 2D is funny to me... He's a little cartoon guy. Hazel is very cute.

I have a note here that says Dev's birthday is separated from Founder's Day by 9 years, 7 months, 14 days. So, he's had Peri for 4.5 months?

-> That is not too shabby in a universe where it's rare [in the OG series] to keep godkids for a year. Nice job, Dev!

...... Do you think they'll bring back rule-free fairyversary muffins (There WAS a full movie about it), because I have a pretty good idea what he'd wish for. Smells like trouble...

Okay, let's go! ... Peri does not think his parents are cool. And Dev is SHOCKED they came over. Also, he has no idea what to do with this much attention. He's SO red.

Hm. Peri looks really unimpressed... Did he already give Dev every birthday wish he wants and now it'll be awkward when Hazel gives a gift, because what can she possibly give that Peri didn't?

-> Dev still seems delighted Hazel's here! I think her friendship is the best gift :)

-> I do not think Peri knows enough about Dev's interests to surprise him, especially since they weren't getting along in the Dimmsonian episode because Dev was frustrated Peri couldn't "make a better cupcake" and Peri was frustrated Dev couldn't figure out what flavor he wanted.

-> Peri gives me "by the book" learning vibes; he's frustrated Dev doesn't listen to him and is harder to work with than the theoretical child he had in mind, I think.

-> Okay yeah, Peri is having NONE of this. Okay, Mr. Jealous Clingy Boyfriend Vibes...

Aw, Cosmo is trying to cheer Dev up... Peri, you wanna... jump in, or...? No?

Also, I'm enjoying watching what at this moment in time seems to be a healthy friendship and/or romance develop. I'm all for tormenting children, but this is nice too.

Peri...

Also, Dev thinks Hazel is like, the coolest person ever. And Peri is SO jealous Dev would rather hang out with his human friend than with a magical fairy. That's hysterical.

Something something, Juandissimo spent 3 seasons getting fired and bounced around Fairy World because he couldn't stop crying over how much he loved and missed Remy and finally broke Da Rules to return his memories, something something, Peri came here for a good time and he is honestly feeling so attacked right now.

I don't know what I'm trying to say, but... u get it. Two spoiled bullies, two very different dynamics. It's not the kid; it's the willingness of the fairy to meet them where they are... and love unconditionally.

Local celebrity kid who spent his Spellementary School life getting fawned over never developed the social skills to make friends and doesn't know how to deal with people viewing him as a flawed three-dimensional person.

For some reason I'm getting flashbacks to the end of "School of Crock" when Poof referred to his classmates as "his friends and Foop."

Okay, I thought Dev would freak out (/negative) over seeing boots since his dad literally unveiled a statue of him kissing his beloved boots while disregarding his son, but... he likes them! Despite that emotional blow, he is a Dimmadome to his core.

-> Dev getting his very first pair of little cowboy boots with tiny spurs 'fic, please.

-> Toddler Dev trying on his dad's or grandpa's boots 'fic, please.

Dev: Why didn't YOU think of getting me [rocket boots], pickle-brain Peri? Peri: Because my job is to grant you wishes! Not to read your mind!

Yikes... It's been a long few months for them.

Also, Cosmo and Wanda choose this moment not to overstep on the parenting relationship here and that's fantastic. Sorry, Peri- You're on your own for this one.

-> Wanda's totally willing to get Peri out of here if he needs it. So... she probably did notice Dev being snippy with him, but actively chose not to step in since Peri told her not to overstep in "Lost in Fairy World." Interesting.

Hm. I wonder if Peri has an animal form? I imagine he takes the form of tech or something that wouldn't catch Dale's eye. He probably sleeps in Dev's bedroom though (and/or "Hassle in the Castle"-esque pocket space).

-> Peri in his debut: /confidence oozing from every pore

-> Peri 4.5 months later: my crops are dying. I'm crops.

I love this family.

Though I feel like... it puts a weird level of stress or professionalism on Peri and Dev. I don't really have the words for it, but something something, maybe Peri's first assignment shouldn't have been so close to his parents because they are clearly struggling to let him speak or handle things himself. It's nice he can ask advice, but I feel like if they're around too often and Peri defers to them, that blurs lines and will be really confusing for Dev.

Who do you listen to if your fairy is telling you "Yes" and his parents - who have no technical authority over you but have ambiguous semi-authority in your fairy's mind - are telling you "No?" That's workplace tension waiting to happen.

And Peri is clearly trying to set his workplace boundaries - we saw that in "Lost in Fairy World" especially - but Cosmo and Wanda keep kinda undermining him and bringing family vibes into work, and he's also grown now, so... Yikes. I love them, but that's rough, buddy.

Forget that- Is that Vicky?

?? Vicky is still young? Or is this Vicky's daughter? MARK, what did you do? I know you literally have clones of her, sir.

I mean, I guess it's not out of the question she'd look the same years later- she had the same hair when she was 5 back in "The Switch Glitch" and she clearly likes that style, but I wasn't expecting it, especially since she's probably close to Dale's age and he's clearly beefed up (and I think gotten taller). Huh. Well, all righty.

The golden cowboy boots on display with the "In honor" plaque are not doing anything to disprove my tentative theory that Doug Dimmadome has passed on and that's why Dale is so clingy towards his boots.

Pfft, the "Icky Vicky" song is still a thing.

SLKJDF, I'm amazed they carried through with Vicky being the one to put Dale to work at the lemonade stand. I'm still confused as to whether she started it at age 9 or took over from someone else.

DEV DOESN'T KNOW HER???

Dale, you are a terrible dad. How can he be so bitter about his past and tell his son horror stories about Vicky, and/or not keep constant watch for her? I can't believe he hasn't sued her into oblivion.

-> It's because he doesn't tell Dev stories unless it's to gripe about how he needs to pull his weight because "My life was so hard when I was your age," isn't it?

I like how Dev is trying to lightly call to Peri for help without attracting attention or moving his lips. Geez, man- That's gotta be so stressful when you're trying to rely on someone new to help you and they don't show up. He didn't have him in the Hocus Poconos and he can't get him out here when he needs him. This is gonna be great on his trust issues, I'm sure.

Peri looking at his dad vs. Wanda looking at her sexy husband:

Dev will hang with his friends, but he's not putting down his stuff.

This next face he makes (without words) to signal "Hey, I'm doing my best" is so funny to me. He's like. "Yeah, I don't have to say anything; she knows what's going on here."

... I'm confused. What is up with Wanda and Cosmo right now? Why are they leaving notes to Dale that out Hazel as a godkid and them as fairies (who are disguised as humans)?

I get that they're not thinking ahead and are spelling out notes while they talk to each other, but surely they should know better than to leave evidence, especially after they saw Cookie get 10k years in prison for revealing the existence of Fairies and we know Hazel could be separated from them. Peri clearly knows this is a bad idea. Utterly incomprehensible to me.

"Icky Vicky" remix!!! Also, Dev handles rocket boots way better than Kevin Crocker did.

Dev "It's not a children's party; I'm a BIG KID!" Dimmadome - Dude, you just turned 10. I mean... That is double digits and you're just a little guy, so... good job.

I'm so glad I was right and that Dev isn't allowed to drink lemonade. That's hilarious. I'm obsessed. He wants it so much...

A.J., Poof, and Crocker sure changed a lot considering Vicky looks the same.

I love Dev covering Hazel's eyes so she doesn't see the partially naked money-covered mural of his dad.

The fact that this is even in the show is hilarious; it says so much to me. Dale "Obsessed with flaunting where I am now in life" & Dev "Instantly doing damage control so my BFF doesn't feel uncomfy or think I'm weird and ditch me" Dimmadome.

....... I said BFF, but I'm pretty sure Dev said Trev was his BFF in Episode 1 and now I'm wondering why we haven't seen them together at all. Hm. I'm gonna have to circle back to Episode 1 later; I might be misremembering.

Their names are Dev and Trev... Where is this silly duo? We're bein' ROBBED!

Peri's grown out of calling Wanda "Mama"- just "Mom." Good note for me in case I want to write something in line with New Wish's canon specifically, since I've always used "Mama" in 'fics even when he's older.

Peri watching his parents make innuendo jokes:

Oh, INSTANT panic on their end at the news of Vicky in the house. More so than with Crocker!

50 years of deep-seeded trauma... This would be a fantastic title card or redraw. Maybe I'll draw it someday.

Cannot believe Peri has been whiplashed back and forth by being snarked at, coddled, reminded of his Hocus Poconos trauma, and now he's facing Vicky trauma all within a couple episodes. It's been a long 4 months.

Peri @ Vicky: "She's REAL!? I thought I imagined her as a baby!!!" is he ok.

-> This is very funny to me because it plays into my headcanon of Poof growing up to forget most of his time with Timmy, including his name, and beating himself up about it.

I don't think Peri has gone one episode without going full panic mode over something. This kid's not lasting long as a godparent. Dev's gonna crack him like a nut and then Jorgen's going to wipe the floor with him.

omg, Dev needs his godparent to stand up for him against Vicky and Peri's having a MELTDOWN and hiding behind his mom. Um???

Holy cow, I've never seen him break like this, except maybe when he gained his fear of the dark in "Lights Out." That includes his many brushes with death and when Fairy Court unraveled his existence from the timeline.

-> I cannot believe I made a joke about how I wasn't sure how things could get more traumatizing for Peri than having to face the Hocus Poconos and yet here we are. Yeah, he's gonna put in his two weeks' notice like... tomorrow.

He ditched his godkid! Peri!!! You are a grown-up now! You can't do that!!

Okay, so Vicky is as tall as Cosmo and Wanda, so she can be an adult, sure. Also, Cosmo and Wanda finally getting the chance to stand up to her <3 I don't remember her tormenting them that much but maybe it's secondhand spooks.

-> Peri's meltdown continues in the background. That is some DEEP trauma.

Even if this was a non-Vicky person, would Peri be mentally equipped to deal with it? Because he's reacting badly for a guy whose memories are so wobbly, he can't remember if they were real. He's not there for Dev and he clearly has some issues to work out.

-> I think he needs more godparent training; he is NOT ready.

(Full moon!)

Ooh, Dev feels like his dad replaced him with Hazel... Dev out here like "Wait a sec, the reason my dad's not been around in 4.5 months is because apparently he's obsessed with you?" Oh boy... Those three expressions just tell it all (The horrified realization, the despair, the anger...)

omfg, Dev just found out Hazel "wished to become friends with him" ("I wish I knew why he acted so mean") and he feels like he's not good enough to be liked without a wish and everything was a lie, and he is CRASHING and screaming. Oh, geez louise. Terrible job, everyone!!! Everybody loses!!

I really like this night city skyline. It's so pretty. I love this decompression scene. Really good storytelling move and also nice to look at. I want to write with these vibes.

Man, Hazel's comforting herself and turning to Cosmo and Wanda for support (and making plans of how to make her evening better after getting yelled at).

I bet I know who's NOT about to turn to his fairy for support~

Dev: And where tf were you!?!?

"I was calling for you; why didn't you answer me? Why is no one ever there? Why does everyone else 'matter more' than me, even the people who are supposed to look out for me?"

Peri: D':

-> I like how the poof clouds still have words in them. Also, the scribbling scene is really well-done; Dev is losing his marbles.

Oh man... Thaaat's a big mess. Welcome home, child trauma show <3

Also, fanfic timeline notes under the cut:

[Contains a small timeline spoiler for Along the Cherry Lane, which is a 'fic I won't be starting for a long time. This is already in my Timmy's Timeline notes from the sideblog, though, so if you've already seen it, it's nothing new]

Wanda said it's been a "couple decades" since her encounters with Vicky. So... is Vicky like, 36?

I could've sworn Vicky and Dale were close to the same age; he has a teen body design in "Nectar of the Odds."

His age might've been adjusted though, or at least he may have started at a very young age. He told Dev in "Stanky Danky" that "when he was his age, he was working in a factory making lemonade every Saturday" and missed all the Saturday cartoons. This is Dev's 10th birthday, so maybe the thought here is "Dale started at age 9 or 10, then stopped at age 16 or 17."

If that's true, then yes, he's Vicky's age.

So. In that case, that screenshot of distraught Dev I put up in my "Battle of the Dimmsonian" post and captioned as "This is probably how Dale used to look at Vicky and then she kicked him down the stairs" is probably age-accurate too, and that's even worse.

Let's say it's been 2 decades and Dale was 16 then, now 36. That would mean he had Dev... Let's say around age 26 or 27.

-> That would jump us from 2002 [in my 'fics] to Dev being born around 2012, with New Wish taking place more or less around 2022. I think I'm okay with that- We saw in "Fearless" that the Enrichment Academy's most recent champion win was 2019 and they win every few years, so that makes perfect sense.

I think my 'fic Along the Cherry Lane ends with Tammy and Tommy close to age 10 in 2020? Let me see...

Riddle's Cloudlands AU notes: - Timmy parts ways with Cosmo and Wanda on October 15th, 2010 - Chloe parts ways with Cosmo and Wanda the night of March 20th, 2011. - Tammy is born September 2013 & Tommy February 2016 - Tammy and Tommy receive Cosmo and Wanda as godparents in 2023 (He's 8 or 9, she's 10 or 11)

Hmm... That's riding really close to Hazel's timeline. New Wish will probably be over by the time I'm done with my current longfics and ready for Along the Cherry Lane, so I won't worry about it for now, but it'll be nice to have these notes later in case I do want to try fitting this into my canon. We'll see if we get any hints about Tammy or Tommy in future episodes. I'd love to see Hazel meet Timmy with his kids, though I doubt we'll see that.

-> I also would not be opposed to kicking "Channel Chasers" out of New Wish's canon because it's not an episode I have attachment to and, well... we don't have flying cars or robot babysitters yet.

... If I were to keep everything, I feel like I'd rather take New Wish as canon and then put "Channel Chasers" after it (even if that violates the "20 years later" label) than commit to "Channel Chasers" and kick Hazel away. I was dreading worldbuilding a society that gained flying cars and robots within 20 years anyway, so I wouldn't be mad.

-> But I'll have to decide how much New Wish I want to incorporate into my canon, seeing as I usually prioritize the OG series in Cloudlands AU above spin-off media. Hmm.

Again, I won't be finishing this 'fic for a long time, so New Wish might be over by then and I'll have more information to work with.

Thanks for reading my liveblog!

[inky-evergreen]

Here's my redesign of Frida that's apart of my version/rewrite of the reboot. Frida is definitely one of my favorites out of the gen 2 clones buts it's sad that she doesn't have that much development and personality. Like you can describe the other clones personality in much more detail that Frida's which sucks. Like she doesn't really have that much flaws and flaws are basically a staple in clone high character so it just feels like the writers didn't really try hard. And the only times they really focused on her character are episode 2 and 8 from season 3 which breaks my heart as a Frida fan.So she's probably one I change the most(?). I just want to give her justice and give her the same appeal that the others clone have.So here's some info about my version of Frida

•Frida is a socially weird but chill artist who wanted people to accept her for who she is apart from her clone mother for so long that she gave up and started not caring about anything or anyone that isn't close to her.

•Frida likes the simple things like painting her weird drawings in her studio and observing nature.The only thing that she doesn't like being simple is her wardrobe where she feels like she could express herself other that her artwork.

•She also likes to keep to herself and doesn't really like to be in the spotlight. Like she doesn't care about half the people in the school so what gives. But her friends are Harriet and Confucius so that gets flown out the window sometimes. Like how Harriet convinced her to become class president with her so they could be popular together.

•Speaking of popularity Frida isn't the most popular person in school anymore that title belonging to Confucius. I mean people know her but she isn't the same popularity level such as her friends. Like if there was a rating between her Harriet and Confucius she would be last.She doesn't go out of her way to get to know everybody since she didn't want to know them in the first place.

•If Frida was a song she would be A Ballad of a Homeschooled Girl by Olivia Rodrigo

•She can't get a reasonably time of sleep for the life of her. She usually sleep between the times of 12 something pm through 5 am. But she sure does sleep during school mostly she sleep at things she doesn't find interesting.

•Doesn't like being compared to her clone mother and has a EXTREMELY complicated relationship to her clone mother. She also has massive identity issues.

• Absolutely do NOT talk about her middle school through freshman years cause she isn't to proud of them. Like if you tough she was weird and awkward now you just had to see her when she was 13.

•Like explained in Tophers info dump, Frida and Topher are mortal enemies for an unknown reason. She's more obnoxious in hating him though like calling him out publicly and accusing him of doing something that isn't woke.

•She changes personalities DRASTICALLY when she's around her friends. With her friends she gets to be herself and is more happy unlike when she's out in public. She's mostly dismissive out in public giving her a "cool" aura too her.

•Has a weird sense of humor like she finds stupid things and things that most people won't find funny funny (sometimes she's embarrassed ashamed about that fact though).

•Has very complicated feelings towards Cleo

• Basically the sudo "Gandhi replacement" out of the new cast since bro is still a popsicle in the timeline in my rewrite (at least for now hehehehehehe). And since Frida and Abe friendship is more apparent in my rewrite to that Abe kinda sees Gandhi in Frida sometimes. Like she act kinda similar to Gandhi just a calmer and less hypered out version of him. She also parallels him in her friendship with Harriet and Confucius (Like Harriet paralleling Abe and Confucius paralleling Joan that type of stuff).

• She can sometimes be rude and brutally honest to the point that it seems rude (but most of the time she means well). She can also selfish and disrespectful. Keeps huge grudges like her relationship with Topher. Acting a little childish and very impulsive, insecure and handles conflicts very poorly. She also can be judgemental of new people and imidetly thinks they have wrong intentions that resulting in acting dismissive towards that person.She has periods of times we're she acts irrational mostly of her bad sleeping schedule.

•But Frida is a pretty cool person if she cares about you. She's enthusiastic, extremely loyal, would give you solizied advice (even if it's harsh). Would always make you laugh and is fun to be around. Determined to be herself even if people don't like her. She usually stays quite and listens to either Harriet or Confucius rambling but when she gets excited for some she gets EXCITED. Like she would talk about that something for hours. She can be optimistic at times and would reassure you if your feeling down. She also playful and would playfully tease you sometimes as a sign of friendship. She cares and love her friends deeply and would move heaven and earth for them. She may look cold and "cool" on the outside but she's a loving and genuine person.

[ayanominitrash]

Dowdy Dowdy (Naoya Zenin x reader)

I first posted this on Ao3 here.

"I'm here to talk to Naoya-senpai." You say, hands behind your back while staring at the ground. You can't stop the heat coming from your cheeks, coupled with your beating heart. "My next words are for him and him only." "Oh?" You look up and see that the tall senior before you have an eyebrow raised, and a hand on his hip. Where Naoya is your bully, but you love him anyway.

₊˚ ♡

A student of Jujutsu High, you were alone. You had no friends. People already assumed you're an awkward person because of that. You have helicopter parents preventing you from going outside after school, so you would be alone in your room. 

But Naoya-senpai was the only one who gave you the time of day, even if he was doing it just to bully you. Imposing his misogynistic ideals and telling you how a woman should be. He'd purposely foot his foot out to trip you, and he'd smack anything you're holding in your hands, saying "oops" before he continues walking. He even went as far as dumping his drink on you because he didn't like it. You like him regardless because he was the only one you can really have a conversation with.

The others saw how badly you were treated but no one stepped up or asked you if you were okay. It's not like you were looking for pity, that was the last thing you wanted. But you find it odd that no one else seemed to join in on your abuse. They'd stray away from you when you try and approach them to ask a question. Was it because they were afraid that they'd be bullied by Naoya-senpai as well if he saw them interacting with you? He once saw a few boys plotting something sinister on you, but he'd sneer at them, making them run away in fear and never look your way again. Or, were you really that awful that your peers couldn't even stand to be in the same room as you?

That's why, your interactions with Naoya-senpai, even if it was demeaning, you valued every second of it.

You'd get to hear his deep voice, all mocking and condescending. Nitpicking everything he considers a flaw in you. But you'd listen with helpless watery doe eyes cast on the floor, wringing your thumbs together. Naoya-senpai would ask you questions, mostly about why you were like this, if you knew this or that, only to say how unintelligent you are. And yet, he keeps talking to you every day. As if it was part of his routine. As if, he was constantly thinking of you.

That's why you stay, and listen. And your beating heart races every second you spend with him. Out of fear? Or perhaps, out of fondness for the senior. 

Naoya-senpai was known to be strong, smart, and excessively handsome. He'd have a different girl around his arm every now and then, and he'd show her off to you if you happen to bump into him in the hallways. Telling you she almost resembles a proper woman. 

He waves a hand. "She's not much, but maybe try? At least."

And the girls around him were pretty seniors. Far from your appearance. But that doesn't deter you. Even if he was with them, he'd still talk to you.

So one day, you finally muster all of the courage you had and walk up to Naoya-senpai at his usual hang-out spot at the side of the school. Talking to him alone was probably better, but there wasn't a time when he isn't surrounded by his usual 3 friends. 

"Hey, Dottie," Naoya-sama calls you by your usual nickname. He calls you Dottie because it's close to the word "dowdy", something he and everyone would always describe you as. "What do you think you're doing here? Don't you know it's inappropriate for a girl to meddle with a group of men?"

"Hey Naoya, this looks like a love confession!" One of his friends snickers, shaking your beloved senior's shoulders.

"Oh god, Naoya pulled a nerd!"

"What a slut!"

"I'm here to talk to Naoya-senpai." You say, hands behind your back while staring at the ground. You can't stop the heat coming from your cheeks, coupled with your beating heart. "My next words are for him and him only."

"Oh?"

You look up and see that the tall senior, before you have an eyebrow raised, and a hand on his hip.

"What do you have to say? You're wasting my time, Dottie."

"You heard him, scamper away chick."

"Get lost."

"Naoya-senpai!" You force your voice almost breaking, causing the group of men before you to quiet down. 

Your hands fly from behind you and you extend them in his direction while you bow. 

"I -I love you, Naoya-senpai! Please accept my feelings!"

A pause.

You waited. You waited for him to say something, or at least, pick up the drink you were offering him.

It was his favorite matcha tea drink. The one he always gets from the vending machines.

Suddenly, you hear hysterical laughter and peer up, only to find his friends laughing, but not him. 

He has his beautiful golden eyes on you, a big hand over his mouth, tapping his index finger as if he was thinking of something. 

"Do you hear that, Naoya?! I told you it was a love confession."

"Yow, this is crazy!"

"I can't believe it myself if I couldn't see it with my own eyes and hear it with my own ears!"

"Naoya-senapaii, oohhh, I love you! HAHAHA, man, what a joke!"

Naoya chuckles at his friends' antics, or maybe even at you, "Enough.

"Dottie, did you hit your head?"

His friends laugh again and your face pales as you retract your arms.

"N-no -"

"Did you really think I'd settle for someone like you? "

You try to swallow the lump in your throat."T-then, why would you talk to me, every day? S-surely it meant, y-you wanted - "

"What?" He scoffs. "Revolting, seriously. You must be as dense as ever. No, Dottie. I'm not interested, but maybe my friends would like to take you up on the offer?"

"Gross, dude, no!"

"What is this? Giving us hand-me-downs?"

Hands gripping tightly around the drink, you fight back the tears forming in your eyes. "I -I'm not stupid! I know you call me Dottie because I'm all frumpy and dowdy looking, but my feelings for you are real! Because -and -and, why do you make sure everyone else doesn't pick on me?! What does that mean?"

He looks at you as he tilts his head to the side as if he was dumbfounded. "Frumpy and dowdy?" He smirks. "Is that what you think?"

"You told me!"

"Hmm? I don't recall."

"Naoya-senpai -!"

"Alright, kid. Stop bothering Naoya, you're starting to get annoying."

"Scram or I'll make you."

You shoot him one last pleading look, "Naoya-senpai . . ."

He yawns. "Get out of my face."

The drink drops from your hand before you sprint away, his friends' laughter gets smaller and smaller the farther you run away as your tears finally fall down your cheeks.

You weren't stupid. You knew what he'd say.

But, you were determined to get your feelings out there. To be strong like your Naoya-senpai. But, as the tears flow down your cheeks. . . 

You feel weak as ever.

After the confession, you'd think the students would laugh at you when you enter the hallways but to your surprise, they kept on walking. 

Did the seniors not tell say anything about your confession?

You went on your school days as usual, alone. No one would talk to you and you'd absent-mindedly stare out the window or mess with your phone. The different thing about here is you avoid all the places you'd usually bump into Naoya-senpai. You'd eat lunch with the teachers in the faculty room. You walk the alternative path to some rooms. You'd skip out buying something from the cafeteria just to avoid him.

And when it can't be helped and you end up in the same space as him, you'll walk faster and purposely sidestep him, before he even opens his mouth. This happens a few times in a span of several weeks.

Until Naoya-senpai caught you on the rooftop after classes, under a golden sunset.

"Sorry, I'll leave."

The senior was standing in the doorway and immediately blocks your path. You freeze and you glare up at him, to which he just snickers.

"Oh? Where did that come from? Gotten a little strong since - "

"I'm sorry for bothering you. The rooftop is all yours."

You try to get past him again but he only leans an arm against the door frame, looking down at you.

"Knock it off, bitch. Can't you see I'm trying to talk to you?"

"I don't want to talk to you."

He smirks, "I thought you said you loved me?"

Your hands ball into fists at your sides.

"What's that? Do you want to hit me, Dottie?"

There's that nickname again.

"Please, I would like to leave."

"Why? But you love me. Why would you ever want to leave?"

"Let me through!"

You can stand his constant insults about your lack of intelligence and appearance, but you find it hard to stand there and hear him make fun of your feelings. 

It hurts too much.

So you try and get past him again, but he grabs both of your arms in a tight grip and pulls you close in front of him.

Too close.

And he was angry. His eyes were raging boring holes into yours. For the first time, you were scared of him.

"Did you say those words just to spite me?!"

"W-wha - "

"You were lying, weren't you? You were trying to make fun of me? Me?!"

You can feel his hot breath and a few of his spit hit your face as he shouts at you, deafening. The tears start streaming from your eyes and you start to sob.

"Y-you're hurting m-me - "

"You think it'd be easy? To fool me? You're wrong, Dottie!"

"I d-don't know what you're t-talking a -about -"

"You tell me you love me, then avoid me?! Are you dense?!"

Your eyes widen as you gasp up at him. His face was red in anger. The sunset's colors paint his face along with it.

And you think, even in his rage, he looks beautiful.

"Naoya-senpai. . ."

"What do you have to say for yourself?" He asks. He's finally stopped yelling.

"You. . .rejected my feelings."

With that, he lets go of your arms. You rub them, certain that they'll leave bruises. 

"You're so stupid. Of course, I did."

"And I know you'd do that." 

He raises an eyebrow at you. "How so?"

"How? Because you bully me every day!"

Naoya-senpai scoffs before walking towards the fence and sits down. You follow him and sit down next to him. The two of you let silence engulf the space around you. The sunset was turning to a chilly evening and you watch as birds flock in the sky amongst the clouds. You can hear the voices from below, and laughter from children and teenagers in the streets. The busy roads. The vendors. The sound of someone dribbling a basketball. 

You were listening to all of it with your Naoya-senpai beside you.

You turn your head a bit to look at him. His blond hair softly flows in the wind as he stares off into the sky. His golden eyes reflected the night's colors and what was left of the orange sunset.

He flicks his eyes down to you.

"What are you looking at?"

You immediately stare down at your lap. 

"Naoya-senpai... You said you... .wanted to talk to me."

"Hmm."

You wait for him to talk more, but he said nothing else. Only the sound of the breeze greeted you. 

After some time, he finally speaks.

"Gift of god."

"Huh?"

"In Greek, "Doron" means"gift" and "Theos" means "God".  Thus, the word Dorothea is equivalent to the 'gift of god.'"

You give him a confused look, to which he clicks his tongue.

"You're so slow. Do you even read any books?"

"I'm sorry, I'm having trouble understanding what you want to say."

"Dottie.

Dottie is a shortened term for Dorothea. Which meaning is also, gift of god."

You gasp.

At first, from his words. Then, what he was about to do next? 

He raises his hand to play with the end of your hair, almost absent-mindedly. And you can't help but feel your heart beating up in your throat.

"I have no excuse for my actions, but I do know I can't stand to end a day without speaking to you."

Your eyes widen at his words, rendering you speechless. 

"You're not just messing with me, are you?"

"What?" You blinked.

"When you said what you said."

"What I said?"

His brows furrowed in annoyance, letting go of your hair. "That you loved me."

"Would I have gone through that trouble?"

Naoya-senpai leans his head into his hand as he watches you. "You know, you ought to be careful, Dottie. You can't go falling for people who are mean to you." 

"Well, nobody else talks to me."

He smiles. "That's good then."

"That's good?"

He shrugs. "I have you all to myself."

You blush at his words and clutch at your chest. "Are you, toying with me again, Naoya-senpai? You can say anything about me all you want, but I can't handle you mocking my feelings."

"And what would convince you otherwise?"

You stay quiet.

"Oh? What a slut."

"I-I didn't even say anything!"

"I didn't even say anything either."

"But you -!"

"Settle down. Men don't like it when women gawk, you know."

"I don't care."

"You don't? You should if you ought to be with me."

You whip your head abruptly back at him "Huh?!"

He suddenly takes your hand in his and brought it up to his lips, placing a gentle kiss.

You felt like your heart could explode.

"Naoya-senpai. . ."

"I think you should know, that I'll only hurt you."

"I don't care." You stare up at him with determination, eyes glistening with newfound hope.

"And I'll keep being mean to you."

"I don't care."

"But I'll make sure I'm the only one who does that."

He lets go of your hand to place his on top of your head. 

Your eyes grow wider, this time with your smile, "Okay."

Naoya-senpai gives you a smirk before standing up and waits for you to get up too. 

You follow his lead and the two of you leave the rooftop. Before you descend the stairs, you take one last look at the scene behind you.

This is where. . .Naoya-senpai made the effort to talk to you alone. where he displayed a rare kindness towards you. At the same moment, his captivating eyes mirrored the color of the sky.

"Hurry." The senior beckons.

This was where your heart was wholly his.

And his was yours. 

⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖

(❀❛ ֊ ❛„)♡ reblogs and comments are appreciated//do not repost my work anywhere

//

i know naoya toxic and my writing and plot here was mid but I still love this anyway tbh

[matchavellichor]

Hi, I hope your day is going well when you read this!! I know you said you were currently taking a slight break from writing due to school, and first of all, I'm wishing you the very best of your studies! But I thought I would send a request just in case you do resume writing fics in the future, but feel free to ignore this! This seems a bit plain, but I was wondering if you could write an ominis x fmc where mc is terribly shy and avoidant to no one but ominis due to her feelings for him? Over time, though, Ominis observes her personality when interacting with other people, becoming fond of her but is left conflicted seeing how nervous she is around him, leaving him to wonder if she hates him or not. Since Ominis can’t see MC staring at him or how her cheeks go red around him, we could perhaps have Sebastian take note of this and act like the typical tease-playing wingman to set Ominis and MC up? It’s a pretty fluffy request, but you can lead it down any road you want, whether it turns out suggestively or not.

A/N: hi!!! tysm for the kindness <3 uni is still kind of hectic at the moment unfort, but i LOVED this idea sm so i decided to write a lil something anyway. ty for the request, hope you enjoy!

Great Expectations

Ominis x f!MC - Fluff - 3k words

Summary: Urged on by Sebastian's insistence that the reason for MC's evasiveness is that she harbors a secret crush, Ominis decides to take Sebastian's advice and find this out for himself.

Tags: Miscommunication, Wingman Sebastian, Clueless Ominis, Friends to Lovers, Fluff, Banter, First Kiss

"Some light reading?"

Ominis can sense the way she startles, nearly dropping the tall stack of books balanced carefully in her arms.

“Oh, uh…hello, Ominis,” she greets as she rights herself, voice oddly tight. “I hadn’t realized you were here.”

“Always am. The library’s practically my second home at this point,” he smiles warmly, making some attempt at small talk.

There’s an awkward pause before he clears his throat to break the silence. “I uh, I hadn’t realized you were such an avid reader yourself,” he tilts his head, waving his wand over the topmost title in her pile. “Ah, and you have taste! Dickens is brilliant. I’d love to pick your brain sometime about—”

“I apologize, if—you’ll um, if you’ll excuse me,” she suddenly interrupts, eyes trained at her feet, before she’s brushing past him in the tight corridor of shelves and exiting towards one of the more populated corners of the library.

Ominis frowns, brows knitting together in confusion and what’s beginning to morph into genuine offense at this point.

“Was it something I said?” he mutters under his breath, rubbing the back of his neck.

Ever since they had become acquaintances, any attempts at amicability on his part had been met with brisk dismissals, curt replies, and her avoiding him like the plague. At first he thought her simply timid, but after observing her behavior with the likes of Sebastian or Garreth or any of her other friends, Ominis had been seriously considering some innate character flaw of his own.

He had thought he had made some progress in their relationship at the last gathering they had frequented, a weekend get-together in the Slytherin common room, but it was quickly becoming apparent that he’d been sorely mistaken.

Was he really so unapproachable? Dreadfully unlikeable? Did she simply have no interest in befriending him?

Ominis tries to pretend his ego isn't bruised by this notion, but fails miserably when his brain wanders to more woeful reasons as to why she would want nothing to do with him. His family’s notoriety and the rumors surrounding his person that are frequently pedaled around the castle undoubtedly have already reached her ears.

Filled with a strange sense of defeat, Ominis abandons any of his original plans of reading in favor of sulking in the common room alone. Less than two steps towards the library exit, however, and he’s bombarded by Sebastian.

“Ominis, you sly dog, don’t think I didn’t see you two warming up in the back shelves,” he grins, poking his friend in the ribs and waggling his brows.

Ominis frowns, swatting at the brunette’s hand. “Warming up is certainly not the term I would use. She despises me.”

“Despises you? Are you blind?”

“...Yes?”

“I refuse to believe you’re that blind,” Sebastian amends, scoffing. “Don’t tell me you really haven’t noticed.”

“Noticed what? The way she can’t bear to spend longer than a minute around me?” Ominis grumbles. “Trust me, I’m well aware.”

“Oh Gods, you’re just as hopeless as she is,” Sebastian groans, deeply pained. “She doesn’t despise you, she’s head over heels, Ominis,” he leans in with an all-too smug tone. “Take it from a man who knows the ladies.”

Ominis turns his head over his shoulder as if in search. “And, pray tell, where is this man?”

He receives an indignant smack on the arm. “I’m serious! Trust me, it’s obvious to anyone with eyes. I mean, why do you think she’s always so nervous around you?”

“She probably thinks I’m going to curse her or something,” Ominis mutters. “My reputation isn’t exactly the nicest, Sebastian. Are you forgetting who my family is?”

Sebastian barks out a laugh. “I’m sorry, Ominis, but anyone who takes even a second out of their day to speak to you will know you’re incapable of harming a lacewing fly. Trust me on this, she likes you.”

Ominis pauses for a moment, considering the possibility that had never before crossed his mind before. An involuntary warmth spreads over his skin, surfacing all kinds of unbidden feelings he doesn’t have much experience in handling. Noticing his contemplative silence, Sebastian peeks at the blonde.

“Oh, Salazar, you’re blushing,” he gasps, no small amount of delight seeping through his tone. “You know, for a while I was half-convinced you were incapable of it. Me and Garreth actually had a bet that were half-vamp—”

Ominis scowls, pushing Sebastian’s fingers away from where they were currently trying to prod at his flushed cheeks. “I am not blushing. Look, this whole notion is ridiculous, even for you, Sebastian. She can barely tolerate me, much less harbor some crush on me.”

“Fine,” Sebastian shrugs, feigning acquiescence. “Then flirt with her. See what happens, and if she truly despises you as you say, then no harm, no foul.”

Ominis sputters. “I will not flirt with her, don’t be absurd.”

“Why not? If you already believe she hates you, what do you have to lose?”

“My dignity? My already maimed ego? You’ve seen her in Defence against the Dark Arts, if we’re being realistic I’m probably in risk of breaking a couple bones as well—”

“Ominis, just try,” Sebastian groans, looking ready to rip his hair out. “If you don’t, I’m marching right back into that library and flirting with her for you.”

Immediately, memories of Sebastian’s past trysts with women and the sheer amount of crudeness in even his most tame chat-up lines come to mind. Ominis panics. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Oh, we both know I would,” Sebastian grins, stopping in his tracks and turning back towards the library doors. “Remember that one boiling cauldron line Garreth taught me? I’ll go up and tell her you begged me to use it for you—”

“Stop, stop, alright,” Ominis grits, fisting a hand in the back of Sebastian’s robes to pull him back. He sighs. “I’ll….I’ll speak to her, alright?”

Sebastian claps a hand over his shoulder, pleased. “That’s the spirit.”

//

As much as Ominis would have liked to postpone the inevitable as much as possible, fate was not on his side. He had the misfortune of running into her while on his way to the Great Hall for dinner, and with Sebastian by his side, he would have no chance of escape.

After urging his friend on with not so friendly threats, Sebastian made himself scarce, though undoubtedly somewhere within earshot so he could listen to disaster unfold.

“Just the person I was looking for,” he greets with as much warmth as he can manage, though his nerves are broiling a storm in his gut. “Have you gotten in any good reading today?”

Once again, she seems startled by his presence. “You were…looking for me?”

“Well, yes. I was wondering if I might accompany you to dinner?” he smiles. “Would give me a chance to bore you with my fascination with muggle literature.”

“Oh,” her eyes widen, looking almost excited before it’s washed over with anxiety. “I’m sorry, I uh, I wasn’t…going to dinner.”

“Oh,” Ominis frowns, noting how close they were to the Great Hall. “Where were you heading then?”

“The library,” she blurts out and Ominis tilts his head in confusion.

“But the library’s in the opposite direction,” he nods over his shoulder. “And haven’t you just come back from there?”

“I–I have to go,” she says, suddenly swiveling in the other direction and brushing past him. “Apologies.”

Once again, Ominis is left perplexed, and increasingly hurt. The only thing the interaction has done is given him a bigger headache, her behavior irrational in the face of Sebastian’s theory. Ominis finds himself even more convinced she hates his guts.

As if on cue, Sebastian ducks out from behind a tapestry shielding an alcove, an almost pained sort of grimace on his face.

“That was…bad.”

“Understatement of the year,” Ominis groans. “Do you see what I mean? She clearly doesn’t like me, Sebastian. All I’ve done is made a bigger fool of myself.”

“She’s nervous, Ominis. She was blushing the entire interaction. Look, maybe try being more direct? Girls like confidence! Tell her you will spend time with her and that you won’t take no for an answer.”

Ominis blinks at him. “Are you trying to get my bollocks hexed off?”

“While that would be deeply amusing, no,” Sebastian assures. “Look, she’s clearly just too shy to let herself spend time with you, that’s why she runs away. You can’t give her a way out, hell, incarcerous her if you have to.”

Ominis looks genuinely concerned for any women that have had the terrible misfortune of being the objects of Sebastian’s romantic interest. “How you’ve not found yourself in Azkaban yet amazes me.”

“Oh, shush,” he scowls before suddenly snapping his fingers, metaphorical lightbulb lighting up his face. “I’ve got it! Remember how Sharp gave her detention this weekend for sneaking ingredients for Garreth? Just muck something up tomorrow in Potions, and done! She’ll be forced to spend a whole evening with you.”

“That’s a terrible idea.”

“It’s brilliant,” Sebastian grins, far too proud of himself. “Everyone knows detention is the best place to snog.”

Ominis chokes. “There will be no snogging—”

“Oh, got bigger plans in mind, have you? Ominis, you dirty little devil—”

The tips of his ears burning bright-red, Ominis pushes through the entrance doors to the Great Hall before Sebastian can get another word in, thanking Merlin she’d foregone dinner tonight.

//

While sprinkling some erumpent horn powder in Sharp’s cauldron during a practical demonstration was easier than he’d thought, actually having to go to detention the upcoming Saturday evening was not.

Pacing his dorm room anxiously while he counts down the hours until he has to make his way down to the Potions classroom, Ominis can’t help but be besmirched by his own stupidity at how he inevitably let Sebastian talk him into this.

Like the devil, Sebastian pokes his head through the door, not even bothering to knock. He plops himself down on one of the beds, eyeing the blonde with poorly-concealed bewilderment. “What are you so strung up for?”

“Not helping,” he glowers. “What if she runs away again?”

“Relax, would you?” Sebastian rolls his eyes, standing to walk over and muss the blonde’s hair. Ominis scowls and swats at his friend, but Sebastian is nothing if not stubborn, pulling at Ominis’ neatly folded uniform tie until it drapes messily around his neck.

“Perfect,” he grins, standing back to examine his work.

Ominis frowns, attempting with great futility to smooth his hair back into place. “I look like a delinquent.”

“How would you know?” Sebastian raises a brow. “You look great. Girls like a bit of a bad boy, you know. And after your stunt in Sharp’s class you’re certainly starting to build a reputation.”

“You were the one who told me to do it!”

“I told you to get yourself detention, not cause a minor explosion.”

Waving a wand over his wristwatch to check the time, Ominis’ pulse doubles when he realizes he has to be in Sharp’s classroom in a few minutes.

Before he can talk himself out of it, Sebastian is dragging him out the door, blabbering terrible advice as if he’s sending his friend off to a first date and not detention with a grouchy Potions master.

“—And most importantly of all, compliment her, Ominis. I know you’re not very expressive, but for the love of Merlin, tell her she looks nice,” he practically shoves the blonde through the common room door, adding a final, “have fun! Use the contraceptive charm!”

Ominis is promptly left alone in the dimly-lit corridor, a heat involuntarily rising to his cheeks, praying some greater force will strike him down before he has to humiliate himself any further.

//

The classroom is empty when he finally arrives a few minutes behind schedule, except for where he inevitably finds her scrubbing cauldrons in the back of the room. She tenses when he approaches, but doesn’t startle when he greets her this time. Ominis wonders if he can put it down as progress.

“Sharp asked me to tell you we’re not allowed to use magic,” she nods towards the stack of cauldrons perched on the workspace. “And, um that we’re only to bother him if someone’s bleeding, dying, or dead.”

Ominis nods, pointedly taking the space beside her and dragging one of the soot-covered cauldrons towards him to begin working.

There’s a tension between them that Ominis can’t ignore for the life of him, only the sound of scrubbing to cut through the painstaking silence. After a few unbearable moments, he clears his throat, remembering Sebastian’s advice.

“You look nice tonight,” he attempts, though his voice sounds oddly thick with nerves.

The sound of scrubbing stops. “Sorry?”

“I said you uh, you look very nice,” he attempts with more firmness, though his hands are white-knuckled around the edge of the table to stop himself from bolting from the mortification.

“Is that supposed to be a joke?”

“What?” he asks perplexed, forgetting momentarily a crucial reason as to why the compliment would seem absurd coming from him. “Oh dear Merlin, no, no that’s not how I meant it all.”

“Very funny, Ominis,” she takes in a sharp breath, dropping the brush with a dull clatter into the cauldron before she crosses her arms and faces him, all timidness suddenly replaced by a glaring frustration in her tone. Ominis isn't sure if it's an improvement, but at least she’s talking to him. “Did Sebastian put you up to this?”

“Sebastian? What? Of course not,” he sputters, desperately trying to amend. “I— Look, I’m—I’m sorry. Can I start over? Please?”

She raises an expectant eyebrow.

“You don’t look nice,” he tries, trying to suppress the wince that washes over his features. His only consolance is that Sebastian isn’t here to witness any of it. “I’m sorry, no—that’s not—I meant, I’m sure you do look nice, not that I would…know, but,” he runs a hand over his face, certain that if she didn't hate him before, she certainly does now. “I meant, you smell very nice. That I can tell, you…you smell very lovely, actually.”

There’s a long pause where she simply stares at him before her frustration inevitably only seems to double. “Is this what you find entertaining?”

“I’m sorry?”

“You’re taunting me,” she seethes. “You obviously know what I feel for you and now you’re making fun of me for it, aren’t you? You’ve been doing it all week.”

“What? Salazar, no, that’s not it at all—”

“Truly hilarious,” she scoffs, shaking her head. “Very mature. Maybe try being more subtle—”

“That’s not what I’m—”

“You can stop pretending you want to hang out with me all the time now—”

“Will you listen? I’m not—”

“Next time, if you don’t feel the same way, then simply—hmpph!”

Despite the blaring alarm bells that should be going off in Ominis’ head for doing something so painfully impulsive to someone who could hex his entire bloodline in the time it takes her to take out her wand, his mind blanks out into a puddle of warmth as he crashes his lips to hers.

She freezes, mouth unmoving against his in the time it takes awareness to seep into her brain and for her to realize he’s kissing her.

To his relief, when the realization does set in, she kisses him back.

She seems to melt just as much as Ominis, her body instinctively leaning into his, hands going slack at her sides before they instinctively come to hold at his forearms where he’s cradling her face so she can’t pull away.

Ominis pulls him towards her, and then, urged on by some coiling heat inside of him he’s admittedly not too familiar with, he crowds her against the workspace. He nearly topples over several cauldrons in his franticness to deepen the kiss, muttering sheepish apologies through heavy breaths, but he’s far too consumed to feel embarrassed.

His lips on hers are clumsy and impatient, and maybe far too hungry for a first kiss, but she doesn’t seem to mind. Her hands come up to thread through his hair, to drag down his scalp, and Ominis couldn’t stop the groan that leaves him if he had all the composure in the world.

He’s so far gone he doesn’t even care about all the soot they’re getting on each other, too preoccupied with trying to keep his knees from buckling, to press his body even more against hers as if it’s the greatest offense known to history that they’re not physically molded to one another. When he slots a thigh between her legs and she lets out a little noise against his mouth, he thinks he might just collapse.

Ominis skin feels hot to the touch, nerves prickling with want, with the urge to touch and taste and grind until he goes numb. She finally breaks the kiss, panting heavily against his mouth, eyes glazed over with just as much raw need. Though the loss is almost physically painful, Ominis is grateful for small mercies, because he was a few seconds away from tearing through her uniform top.

“You’re…” she swallows, trying to clear the breathlessness from her voice. “Uh, very committed to the bit, I suppose.”

Ominis can’t help the laugh that escapes him.

His shoulders shake, forehead dropping to meet hers, and when he glances back up he smiles, lips still raw and undoubtedly kiss-bruised. She returns his grin, until he can feel her smile against his mouth when he leans down to press his lips to hers again, because he simply can’t help himself.

They barely register the sound of the door to the professor’s office swinging open. Only when he clears his throat do they finally tear apart, and Ominis wonders if it’s possible to drop dead from sheer mortification.

Sharp lets out a long-suffering sigh, as if he’s accustomed to walking in on much, much worse by now and his hardly fazed.

“Just get the cauldrons clean,” he grumbles, grabbing a few texts on one of the adjacent tables. He hobbles back to the door, shaking his head and muttering under his breath. “Bloody teenagers and hormones, don’t get paid enough for this shit…”

He ducks his head out before closing the door, pointing a stern finger in their direction. “And not on my tables.”

[lurkingshan]

Unknown Episode 12

This the end beautiful friends. And I wouldn't say the show is going out with a whimper, exactly, but it's certainly not with a bang. This will remain one of my all time favorite Taiwanese dramas, but I will definitely be remembering it as being so so excellent for 10 exquisite episodes that built to such a beautiful peak and then inexplicably blew it on the dismount.

We already talked about episode 11 and the sex scene blunder, as well as some of the other missed beats there. Episode 12 moved on from the immediate aftermath of Yuan and Qian getting together to give us a sense of what their lives will look like now that they are together. One thing I definitely appreciated is that they aren't hiding this from anyone--they are taking the no shame approach to the change in their relationship, and I love that. I don't know that I entirely bought how brazen they were being, though. Making out in the open office space where Qian's employees could see seemed a bit much even if they weren't brothers, and given that the show didn't portray any awkwardness or any of Qian's expected discomfort with this big shift in their relationship, it came across a little silly and dismissive of how serious a change this should be for them. I would have really enjoyed Yuan threatening Qian with kisses if it had been a more private moment. And I deeply hated the top/bottom discussion amongst the fujoshi coworkers, that was just in poor taste and out of step with the tone of the show (can we just ban bls from doing scenes like this already?).

This final episode also failed to meaningfully resolve Qian's health issue in favor of introducing a new plot: Lili's accidental pregnancy. I have mixed feelings about this development. On the one hand, it helps to reinforce a theme of this family's resilience and ensures they will have a family legacy, and it led to hands down my favorite scene in the episode, which was the family discussion where they were moving between the bedrooms as Qian learned of the pregnancy, promised not to attack San Pang, and then immediately attacked San Pang when he stopped hiding. That was comedy gold and the cast was so excellent in every beat of it. On the other hand, I don't love this plot direction for Lili and I don't think the show really did anything to reckon with what a monumental wrench it will throw into her life plans (note that this is another departure from the book, where Lili ends the story a successful jet setting model who is still single and living her ideal life traveling for work). Lili wants a career in fashion modeling and entertainment; how exactly does having a child at age 23 fit with those goals? The show didn't even bother to consider her future in the way this story was framed. I would have preferred a time skip to do this plot at a more appropriate time for her; as it was this just felt a little careless.

In the end I am glad we got to see the family accept each other's relationships and Qian and Yuan settling into living alone together in the home they love, but I do wish the final two episodes had lived up to the promise of the rest. It felt like the first 10 episodes built so beautifully to a monumental relationship change, and then the show just kinda shrugged their way through the actual change in favor of random new plots and a list of ill-fitting Taiwanese bl tropes. After everything they went through, all tension evaporated instantly, no one was uncomfortable with the relationship becoming romantic, and there was no real nuance in the family discussion about it. They simply didn’t finish the story they started and given they had such strong material to work with from the novel, I will never understand why.

That said, even with a lackluster ending I will always be grateful that we got this gem of a show. Despite its flaws, this story contains some of my all-time favorite characters and relationships. Hats off to the cast and crew for delivering one of my favorite dramas of the year. And I want to also thank the folks on here who made discussion of this show every week so fun. We are a tiny little fandom but the love and devotion to this show was so lovely, and I am extra grateful to those who stuck to the weekly pact for the final episodes so we could keep posting and talking about this story for a couple more weeks. I hope we find another show to love together very soon!

[floralcavern]

My biggest complaint with SBG

Red sucks at writing Taylor, Ben, and ESPECIALLY Logan.

Allow me to talk about the dynamics of each character:

Ash and Aiden: Aiden saw a lot of his past self in Ashlyn, which caused him to want to be close with her, since he doesn't want her to be alone like he was. Ash, who is her own person, gets frustrated with Aiden because he can't seem to understand that she is fine, but over time, they both begin to understand each other much more, the two's bond growing over time. We see that Aiden sees her more as an actual friend then a target for him to cling to, and Ashlyn begins to appreciate Aiden more for how much he cares.

Ash and Tyler: Tyler and Ash are both very stubborn people who get annoyed very easily. Tyler, being the more upfront of these two, finds it very frustrating how she's the leader and he's not. Ash, not being a people person, doesn't want the leader role, but understands she is the most suited to the role. Because of this, her and Tyler often argue, but as time goes on, the two reach an understanding of why the other is the way they are and coming to their own flaws in that process. This comes to fruition when they meet again in the hospital.

Aiden and Tyler: Of everyone in the group, they are the most different while also being the most similar. Because of this, they don't get along at all. But despite the teasing and aggression, they are friends, and they do care, as we see when Tyler is in the hospital.

OK, let's see the other three's dynamics with these guys...

Ash and Taylor: They are friends, and I would even say that Taylor was Ashlyn's first friend. But.. we don't have a clear idea on why they click so easily. Most we can guess is that Taylor is very patient and empathetic, allowing her to understand Ash easily.

Aiden and Taylor: Um... we have nothing. All we have to go off of is official art on Red's Instagram. In that, we see they do loads of bestie dumb shit, but.. we have nothing in the actual comic.

Tyler and Taylor: OK, this one is actually easy! After losing their dad, Tyler felt like he needed to provide for and protect his sister and his mom, leaving Taylor guilty, but also without a brother and with more of a weird father figure. But they both do everything they can for the other to be safe.

Ben and Ash: Um.. they get along. They're both very quiet, so they probably bond over that. We know Ash lets him braid her hair...

Ben and Aiden: The cousins ever. Aiden shows genuine care and protectiveness for Ben, and in turn, Ben is kind of Aiden's wrangler, keeping him out of trouble. They're each other's first friend, I would say.

Ben and Tyler: ... They play guitar with each other-? (As we see in official art on Red's Instagram)

Logan and Ash: When they first met, Ash compares him to a puppy, and she later says she likes dogs, so that's sweet. She also wanted to help him learn defense. Um, what else...? In some official art on Red's Instagram, we see them cuddling in a shopping cart.

Logan and Aiden: ...Um, Logan seem intimidated by him..

Logan and Tyler: Tyler was ready to beat up Barron when he saw him bullying Logan.. so he cares. (Notice how for all of Logan's, I never talked about how Logan views them.)

Now, how these three see each other...

Logan and Taylor: We see them hanging out in the background of the comic, so we know they're chill.

Taylor and Ben: Ben is mute and represses his emotions, and Taylor is an empath, allowing the two of them to have a close understanding and feeling of safety, as we see in that one scene in the comic.

Ben and Logan: Um.. They're both super quiet and awkward. When Ben saw Logan getting bullied, he was ready to throw hands... but, then again, Ben hates bullies and would do that for anyone... hm.

So.. ya. Only a few characters have very strong bonds with one another. Red definitely plays favorites, and I would say that Logan is probably her least favorite. All we really have is official art and our own headcanons. And it sucks! The fun of having these big friend groups in stories is to see all the fun and unique dynamics. Think MLP, ATLA, or Dungeon Meshi!!

[ilikekidsshows]

Since you mentioned the name several times now I looked up who Nikki Maxwell is. From the basic description of her on her wiki page I can kinda see some similiarities to Marinette and now I wonder if you have some more in-depth comparisons between the two to share that would explain your remark on Marinette beeing a copy of her. I think the description of the character doesn't make her seem particularly unique and a character-type I'd expect to appear often in these kind of youth novels.

---

Sure thing! Here's some fun facts about the Dork Diaries series, one of the most best-selling kids’ books of the 2000s, that have been translated into 50+ languages, including French:

Nikki's iconic look is having her hair in pigtails.

She often babysits a small girl with pigtails.

She is a good artist.

She is, despite her poor self esteem, very talented in many areas.

She is extremely clumsy and prone to getting into embarrassing situations.

She gets overly embarrassed about the most inconsequential things.

She has a tendency for highly exaggerated panic spirals, where she comes up with imaginary scenarios that are full of fantastical events and are often illustrated in an anime/manga style.

She gets mad easily and it can take her a while to get over perceived slights.

She’s a bad liar but people believe her anyway.

She is a huge hypocrite, who often does things she claims to not do. (Unlike Marinette, her internal narration almost always points this out.)

She has a crush on a boy in her class, mostly based on the fact that he is nice, and her rival in school also likes him.

Brandon, said crush, is very popular but still a loner, and socially awkward.

MacKenzie, Nikki's rival, is a rich blonde bully who wears diamonds often (and very familiar-looking sunglasses at one point). Despite her vast resources, she always loses against Nikki in whatever they're competing in.

MacKenzie is a more classic “queen bee”, than Chloé, but does get called such canonically.

MacKenzie eventually transfers schools because she stopped having power and prestige over her classmates.

Nikki's biggest character flaw is a lack of communication, where she puts off telling people things she thinks they won't like hearing. (Unlike Marinette, she actually has to make it up to people when they find out she's been lying to them.)

A typical plotline in Dork Diaries is that, despite being well-liked, having devoted friends and caring parents, Nikki often hides her problems from them and struggles needlessly.

Nikki eventually gains a secondary love interest, André, who looks eerily similar to Luka in illustrations, in addition to having Astruc's favorite French guys' name.

Nikki's classmates include characters named Max, Chloe and Zoe, with Chloe and Zoe being closely associated with each other. (You know what I always say: two is a coincidence, three is a pattern, and we're now counting four same names.)

Many of these things are, to be fair, very basic school drama protagonist cliches. However, when it's this much similarity between two supposedly unrelated characters, especially with some of the highly specific similarities here, like the animesque imagine spots, it's a pattern and not a coincidence. Is the pattern that there's some template both Nikki and Marinette are based on (like how Vegeta and Hiei’s similarities are because they’re both based off the same older character), or did Astruc copy his protagonist from a mega hit of children’s, especially girls’, literature to try to copy that success? Who knows. It's not like we can expect Astruc to be honest about whether or not he copied Marinette's personality from literature.

I know Astruc hasn't actually read the stuff he claims to have read, so that's a point in favor of Astruc being a too lazy reader to copy someone else's work. However, he must have grown familiar with all these tropes somehow. You can’t hit this many hallmarks of a genre without being somewhat familiar with it, and this genre is the most prolific in literature, and there is research data showing that children often prefer either books or television, so he could reasonably expect the audience not to realize how copy-pasted Marinette is.

Miraculous and Dork Diaries share DNA. How directly they’re related I can’t tell, because I’m not that knowledgeable about the school drama genre.

[secondhandsorrows]

Keys to Crafting Characters Readers Will Root For (w/ some examples)

As a writer and while making up this blog, I’m quite adamant that characters are just as important (if not more) as plot. In the grand scheme of things, an active, relatable, and engaging main character is crucial for a novel's success. But how exactly do we make a character all these things? There’s many ways, in fact. It is up to us as authors to keep track and manage the developmental arc of our protagonist: primarily, who they are on the inside, and how they grow or change / adapt to the situations or people around them. 

Here are some examples and tips to help you develop a compelling protagonist (or all kinds of characters). Keep in mind these tips are at their most basic, essential level (there’s just so much that can be explored in each one), so I hope to go further into each point sometime in the future. 

~`* They have clear goals and motivations.

First things first: you’d want to clearly define your character's goals and motivations — and the sooner, the better. Proper and well-set goals and motivations provide a sense of direction to the narrative. They should be specific, measurable, and achievable — or perhaps, not achievable, at least to its fullest extent. This would ultimately depend on the type of arc or ending you intend to write for your story, but there should at least be some main goal the character is vying for, and a motivation that dictates how much they want or need it. 

For example: An aspiring actress hoping to make it to the stage and audition for the lead role in her favorite play.  —> Why does she want to be an actress so badly? What does it mean to her to act in her favorite performance? What does she have to prove, to herself or others?

~`* They are flawed, yet relatable:

I’m sure you’ve all heard this before… but I’m still going to reiterate:

Your character should have relatable flaws that readers can sympathize with. It’s no secret that flaws make characters human and relatable. Flawed characters help us remember that nobody’s perfect, and that we’re not alone in our struggles and in our plights (stay back, Mary Sues!). These flaws can be anything, from fears, limitations, biases, misbeliefs, quirks, shortcomings, or behaviors. It’s useful two have at least two: a minor flaw and a major flaw, where the former affects only the only character and nothing else, and the latter hinders the character and affects the plot. 

For example: A highly-knowledgeable yet socially awkward and oblivious professor who can hold a bar of soap better than a conversation.  —> Does this flaw make him out to be charming or weird to others? How can his social-awkwardness affect the plot… does it hinder him from connecting to his students or colleagues? 

~`* They have unique talents or interests.

Sometimes I read a story, and personally I have a hard time connecting with a character if all they care about from beginning to end is what’s happening in the plot. It’s like they exist for the sole purpose of the plot, and are nothing but a shell to see through the events or its challenges. This is understandable, especially when it’s an action-packed story or thriller. 

Personally, I can’t help but wonder what its main character does for fun. What they’re like before the events of the novel. 

I think it can be useful your character skills or interests that set them apart. This not only makes them interesting, but can drive the plot in unexpected ways. *Bonus points if they have a particular skill or hobby that conflicts with the way they present themselves to others, or if they hide it well if they are embarrassed by it or afraid of getting judged. Essentially, this is all to clue-in on the reader to the character’s backstory, their personality. It helps them seem more individualistic, like humans with their own sets of interests or ideas that give them more complexity and uniqueness. This can also be useful in creating parallels or connections to your story’s themes or your character’s arc. 

For example: A brave warrior with an aptitude for gardening and flower arranging.  —> Seems random, right? But what if this warrior had workin in their relative’s flower shop, and has kept the skill alive in their days of battle to see pieces of beauty around them, hope from fear and danger? They might dig graves of their fallen friends and leave behind flowers in remembrance. Just an obscure  example, but see all the possibilities something like this can open up?

~`* They have deep, complex relationships.

Sometimes we can get a better idea of a character when we see them interact with the people around them. It’s like showing vs. telling, where we get a firsthand look at how the main character treats his family members, how he accepts or refuses help from those he’s close with, what he appreciates most about his significant other, how he feels about the annoying neighbor next door. Who’s the one person they most admire and never want to let down? Who’s the one person they despise with all their body and soul? Whether it's friends, family, enemies, or romantic entanglements, complex interactions and relationships add layers to your character and in how they showcase themselves to the world. 

For example: An excellent, compassionate therapist with a strained relationship with his own family member.  —> How does this character feel about this kind of relationship? Does it stem out of shared family troubles, or something deeper? Is there a glimmer of possibility the therapist might reconcile with this relative, or are they dashed because of mutual pride or distrust? 

~`* They often face moral dilemmas.

It’s time to get philosophical. Human nature is full of paradoxes and tough moral questions, and so characters with conflicting qualities can be intriguing and relatable. Introduce moral dilemmas and conflicting values that force your character to make tough choices and confront their conflicting values. Do they have a friend with conflicting beliefs that challenge their own? Are they forced to act a certain way because of external pressures? Are they forced to choose between saving one person while destroying another? 

No matter how serious this dilemma is, you can also add a moment of clarity or self-awareness for your character. This can be a turning point where they acknowledge and confront the conflict within themselves, thus becoming face-to-face with their internal crisis and how they decide to go from there. Do they weigh the pros and cons considerably, do they fumble because they’re hesitant, or do they embrace the new changes? 

Despite conflicting values, make sure your character's behavior is consistent with their established personality. Consistency helps maintain authenticity and keeps the character grounded. 

For example: A scientist torn between protecting humanity and the pressure of making a groundbreaking discovery.  —> How does making this discovery very important to this character? What do they stand to lose… what do they stand to gain? Are they at the risk of becoming something completely opposite of who they were at the beginning of the story, losing their sense of morality or forced to choose a side? 

~`* They show their quirks and habits.

Introduce quirks or habits that make your character memorable. These little details can make the character more relatable and interesting, because just like talents or hobbies, this can also give a clearer sense to the reader of what kind of personality the character has and what they’re like. Not to forget, it also helps them to stand out from other characters on the page, giving them a unique voice with their kind of dialogue, their behaviors, style, and mannerisms.  

For example: A scholar who can focus only if she’s chewing gum or wearing her lucky ring.  —> How might’ve this character started this habit or tradition? Does it actually work? Does it not work, but they still do it anyways because it’s comforting for them? Also, where did they get this quirk from?

~`* They have a backstory.

Most of what we’ve been discussing in this post already leaves some framework for the character’s backstory. It’s important to have a meaningful backstory in mind that influences the character's present actions and explains why they are they way that they are. This adds depth and helps readers understand their fears, desires, and motivations better; not shallow and two-dimensional as cardboard cut-outs. 

Sometimes we don’t get a backstory for our character right away. Backstories takes time to brainstorm and shape — let alone into a complex or compelling one — but its helpful to trust the process. What you can do if you’re still looking for the right one, is to ask yourself questions  on things that matter to you most. This pertains to your story’s themes and other main ideas you may like writing about, such as grief or family matters. It all boils down to who your character is (the present), and where it stemmed from (the past). If we take this a step further: does this backstory guide them or force them to make changes within themselves, thus leading to their changed self at the end of the novel/series (the future)?

For example: A woman with a fear of marriage because she’s seen firsthand its faults, including her own parents’. —> Is her parents’ divorce still something she’s struggling to come to terms with? Is her misbelief equating marriage to constant conflict? Does she have a secret desire to get married, yet it put off by its pressures? Does she make up for this fear by focusing on other matters? Will this fear later be disproven?

~`* They are often vulnerable. 

Every hero needs vulnerabilities. Imperfections. Weaknesses. We’ve talked about strengths and flaws before, but giving them that dent in their armor, any little opening someone or something might get through, leaves a reminder that no one, especially our hero, is invincible. Nobody’s perfect, after all (side-eyeing you, Mary Sues…). Make your characters messy: adding vulnerabilities helps makes them more authentic and genuine, opening up chances for them to learn and evolve as the story moves along. 

It can also add a layer of suspense to the story, especially in conflict and tension. How will the character handle someone breaking their walls down, or a bad experience threatening to make them crumble and fall back to old habits? How do they handle their insecurities? How well do they hide their fears, and will they ever admit them?

For example: An old woman with bad eyesight and lives alone can’t tell that the reluctant robber breaking into her home is not her grandson.  —> This is a fun little example that opens up many possibilities. Her bad eyesight is a physical vulnerability, and so is her soft spot for her supposed grandson. The robber notices this, and he too may have a soft spot for any old woman who treats him kindly. Does he use this to his advantage to rob the house, or does he humor her for a while?

I’d definitely like to expand on these tips sometime. If there’s anything you’d like to share or add, please do so! I’d love to hear y’alls thoughts. Hope this helped!

[pheavampire]

Why does Alastor help Charlie?

I think there are two main theories that make the most sense.

The popular theory about Lilith - she owns Alastor's soul and ordered him to protect her daughter. Everything seems to fit: they've been both gone for 7 years, there's a rumour that Alastor was "in holy arms" (so probably in heaven with her), he fights Adam just to almost die and then he has a breakdown and sings that he is "hungry for freedom like never before". He even gives this particular look when he sees her in the family portrait in the pilot episode (he clearly looks at Lucifer first, then he looks at Lilith or maybe Charlie).

That would mean Alastor is a prisoner in the hotel and must protect it against his will.

As much as I like this theory, I don't really think this one is true. Mostly because he goes out whenever he likes. He was also able to run away from Adam after he lost the fight. If he had an order to protect Charlie at all cost, shouldn't he stay at the battlefield to the very end? Plus: I bet Lilith is super smart woman. If she knows Alastor, wouldn't she forbid him to make any deals with her naive, sweet daughter? Would she sent him to her without making sure he won't harm her child in any way?

To me Alastor acts like a man who does what he wants… for now at least.

Let's say he made a deal with Roo, Satan, Loa, even Lilith or other super powerful being - doesn't really matter. For some reason, this being restricted his power, making him weaker and "clipping his wings". Alastor watches the TV show with Lucifer's powerful, yet a bit awkward daughter and immediately knows she needs help. He goes to her and convinces her that he is very, very useful. He wants her to like him, to be on his side - to help him in the future, when he will have a chance to regain his freedom.

Then why he fights Adam, having no chance to win?

Well, to me he doesn't look like someone who knows he has no chance to win. He is super confident he will end Adam's "fucking life". The defeat is a surprise for him - that's why he has a breakdown in the finale. He realises the danger is bigger than he thought. He is "hungry for freedom like never before" because without it, he doesn't have his full power. Without the full power, he is vulnerable.

Now, are you convinced? No? Maybe that's good, because that being said…

…this theory has its flaws too. Mostly because he lost his power in the finale, when Adam broke his cane. It would be weird and kind of inconsistent if the writers made him loose his power twice - gradually.

But! Whatever his deal is really about, I think we can be sure Alastor has something to do with Lilith and that he tries to become Charlie's ally to use her in the future, when he will be finally able to break free from whoever owns him.

[weixuldo]

Allow me// ch 10

Vader x Reader

a/n: so in this Vader is just a lil delulu… he still thinks Padme didn’t love him fully, but its only cause he’s been under the manipulation of the emperor for so many years. also ngl this ch is a lil disorganized at the beginning oops: just lots of vader overthinking

Slight NSFW

warnings: cursing, kissing, grinding, premature ejaculation lol

_____________________

Vader found that the longer he held his position- the more trivial certain matters became.

For years he had been hearing the same complaints and issues circulate through the ranks in different forms. It was old. 

He often let his mind wander during the frequent “highly classified” meetings; nowadays the main thing he would think about was you. He just couldn’t get you off of his mind, ever since that night when he showed you his face. 

He hadn’t removed his helmet since then but he still saw you as much as he could. Of course he already had an inclination towards you even before the reveal, but your reaction to him just kept looping in his head. 

You weren’t scared or disgusted, you didn’t ogle him as if he were some horrible specimen from another system. 

No. you continued to look upon him with the very same expression that you always had- you accepted all of his flaws… you accepted him.

Never in his time as Vader had he yearned for the attention of another being, but you were special. 

He knew the interest was obviously reciprocated but he couldn't tell to what extent. No matter how much you said you cared- how much of that was true?

It pained him to dig up memories of the past, but they were still a part of him- of Anakin…

He believed wholeheartedly that Padme loved him unconditionally and yet she still denied him. In the end her promise of everlasting love was just an empty one. 

But you seemed to care for him regardless of what he did- there was no hiding what he had done as Darth Vader, everyone in the galaxy knew his infamous name.

But even with all his controversial history, your eyes still lit up when he would walk by, your force signature still felt refreshing and flowery, you still found time to ask him how he was doing, you still invited him into your room…

He wouldn’t be able to bring himself to ask you the extent of your feelings until he was more certain of the answer, but of what he could see; it seemed that you were offering him unconditional admiration- something he had chased after all his life. 

Of course a while back you told him that you were his, but he couldn’t help but over analyze that phrase; did you mean you were his in the sense of his personal mechanic; professionally (and sometimes flirtatious sense)? Or in the way that you were really his?

And were you just saying that because you feared denial? No. You were more authentic than that.

So why could he not shake the feeling of worry that washed over him when he would imagine asking you how you saw the dynamic?

_______________________________

You entered his private sector with a warm signature; even inside of his chamber he could feel your electrifying presence. 

As soon as he finished his thought he motioned for the capsule to open so he could meet you halfway. He stepped over the mechanical barrier and straightened his cape before strutting towards the door that you were behind.

You reached for the button to open the only obstacle between you and the man you so desperately wanted to see. 

He slid the door open before you could, making you jump. 

“V!” you smiled, walking past him into the room he occupied. 

His watchful eyes trailed all the way down your body before responding.

“Y/N, how are you today, my dear?”

“I’m good, I got all of the work done so now I'm here to bug my favorite man in the galaxy”.

You and Vader had been exchanging more playful banter (flirtatious, even) and Vader felt like his awkward 19 year old self trying not to blush when you would say things like that.

“Ahh, I see, you just want to distract me from my duties- like running the empire…You must be a rebel spy, my darling” he quipped back. 

Your cheeks warmed at his playfulness; it was a rare thing to have Darth Vader sharing jokes with you. 

“Oh no, my dear” you taunted back using the name he often called you.

“I wouldn’t dream of attempting to infiltrate the almighty Darth Vader’s fortress of a mind…” you said with doe eyes and a stupid half smile. 

He stepped closer and tilted your chin to look into his lenses, “what if I told you that you already have”.

In a moment of pure need, you stepped closer to him and pulled his helmet down to face you and kissed him over the grated mouthpiece. 

You heard the familiar sound of his respirator work a little harder to keep up with his quickened breathing. 

A few weeks ago or even days, you would have completely freaked out and done damage control immediately.

You would’ve tossed out every apology in the book and asked if that was alright; but now you didn’t need to – you could feel his desire lurking in the force around you. 

He stood stunned for a moment before picking you up and carrying you towards his meditation chamber. 

“V, what are you-”

“If you want to kiss me, I should at-least give you a proper one” his deep voice boomed as the top of the chamber descended. 

Soon the air tight seal was in action and a claw-like mechanism from the ceiling came down to remove the helmet. It was only the second time you were seeing his naked face and you were even more excited than the last time.

When his face was finally revealed he blinked a few times, trying to get accustomed to the brightness, before his cerulean blue eyes honed in on you; your hair, your brows, your eyes, your nose, your lips…

“May I?” he asked, waiting for the signal to capture you in a deep kiss.

You nodded furiously and draped your arms around his armored shoulders, before his lips met yours.

Sparks flew.

Sure, the first kiss was a lil too soft and a lil odd, but after you figured out a groove with each other, the kisses became ravenous. 

When was the last time he had felt the sensation of another’s lips on his own? 

He couldnt help but rake his gloved hands up and down your back, pulling you closer to him. He was in heaven, nothing could beat this feeling. 

His insatiable need for you made your core ache for him. Maker, how you wanted to fuck him so badly. Your thoughts raced through your mind and you let a small moan slip against his mouth. 

Fuck. 

Vader felt his pants grow tighter and his dick throb. You were so enticing. It had been so long… so long. He felt like he would combust at any moment. 

He broke away from the kiss to keep himself at bay as he let the building sensation of an orgasm subside. Of course he was embarrassed that he almost got to that point by simply kissing; but to be fair, he had gone from no skin to skin contact in years, to…this.

You, on the other hand, had more experience with this thing than he did.

You placed a gentle hand on the side of his face and breathlessly asked, “Why’d ya stop?”. 

His eyes faded into the beautiful blue you had seen the other day before he attempted to answer; he was cut off by you starting to grind your hips into his, as you dragged your core against his codpiece. 

Vader’s eyes momentarily rolled back and an exquisite noise escaped him before he gripped your thighs tightly and began to kiss your neck.

“Oh, Vader- that feels so-”

Before you could finish your sentence he clawed his hands down your back (not hard enough to hurt) and plunged his face into the crook of your neck as his body jerked forward. Much to his chagrin, he couldn’t hold out any longer, not with you in his lap. 

He came. Hard.

He didn’t even know he still could; it felt weird… the burns of Mustafar made the familiar sensation feel a twinge different. It wasn’t bad by any means, just…new.

After the overwhelming feeling passed he exhaled sharply before tapping your thigh twice. 

You had no idea what just happened and if he was ok or not, so when he tapped your thigh you took that as a sign to get up. 

“Are you alright? Did I do something wrong?” you asked, genuinely worried. 

“No, I-I mean yes! Well no, you didn’t do anything wrong and yes I'm alright. I just remembered I was supposed to discuss a new tactical plan with one of the Moffs. My apologies my dear.” 

and without another word, he left as quickly as he could. 

Only you remained in the meditation chamber, feeling confused and a little sad. 

You worried you had been too forward and upset him- but he assured you nothing was wrong… So you ended up chalking it up to a loss and going back to your quarters with a walk of overthinking.

Did he not like you being like that with him? He didn’t stop it before though…

When you got back you decided just to go to bed- it was pretty late anyways.

_____________

Vader forcefully slid the heavy door to his private room closed and marched up to the platform where he dressed and undressed. 

He called upon the droids to begin undressing him and stood in shame as they disassembled him. 

When they removed the codpiece there was a damp spot on his pants. Great. 

He was glad the droids couldn’t talk (to him at least, they probably exchanged quips about him all the time). 

Since it was late and his duties were fulfilled for the day he opted for a bacta soak- he needed to get clean and to think (as if he weren’t already torturing himself with his thoughts). 

The droids strapped him into his harness and soon his body was submerged in the soothing bacta; the most relieving feeling.

He took a deep breath through the large oxygen mask covering most of his face; what the fuck just happened?

Obviously he knew he came- that was pretty damn evident. But why? (also evident).

He cringed again at the image of him cumming from kissing… was he really that pathetically desperate? 

You probably went back to your room laughing at him. Fuck. What if you thought it was gross?

He groaned and thrashed in his tank at the embarrassing scenes. 

Should he address it to you? Or just act like it didn't happen? Would you bring it up?

He attempted to enjoy the rest of his soak; it wasn’t successful. 

_____________________

You woke up to your details for today; it was an uncharacteristically complex task.

Of course you didn’t mind the difficulty, but what bothered you was that it wasn’t even one of Vader’s machines. In fact it was a totally different department deep down in the belly of the ship… probably the furthest from him. 

You thanked the messenger droid and got ready to go. Unfortunately, you couldn’t stop the intrusive thoughts from barging in; he must really be mad at you to not want you near him.

Did he think you were gross or shameless for what you did?

All you did was kiss… and he was the one who brought you into his chamber. 

He promised you that he wouldn’t let any harm come your way, so you weren't worried for your life; you were worried for your position.

Would he send you back to your own system or transfer you to another unit far, far away from him? 

Maker, what was going on.

***

a/n: ahhh yes, the ever loved miscommunication trope- both y/n and vader need to stop overthinking (also the way they’re both thinking the other thinks they’re gross lmfaoo). i was gonna make this ch longer but then i thought it was alr a little long 😳 ty for ur support and the patience for my shitty upload schedule!

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