#fury incorrect quotes

[marvel-master]

Nick Fury: What are these disgusting alien eggs? How do we get rid of them?

Nick Fury *later*: I love these kitties. I will keep these kitties.

[incorrectacotarblog]

Cassian: the word daddy has been so sexualized

Cassian: my kids are gonna have to call me bruh or something

[acomaflove]

Azriel: *sneezes and shadows come out of his nose*

Rhysand:

Amren:

Morrigan:

Cassian:

Feyre:

Nesta: ………So we are all just going to ignore that?

Cassian: Oh my bad; bless you, Azriel.

Nesta: THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT

[acourtofmishapandmistakes]

Lucien, trying to buy a Father's day card:

Lucien: Excuse me, do you have any that just say "You are my dad"

Associate: Well I-

Lucien: How about "You banged my mom"

Associate: No...

Lucien: You know what, I'll just get a blank one

Lucien, writing in the card: You are a father. This is a day. Here is a card.

[velidewrites]

Rhysand: We should get married Feyre: We've been dating for less than a month Rhysand: And I think I've shown incredible restraint waiting this long

[book-place-incorrect-quotes]

Nick Fury: Please sing the national anthem of the United States

Steve: *singing* Oh, say can you see, by the dawns early light-

Natasha: *singing* What’s so proudly, we hailed-

Bruce: *singing* At the twilights last gleaming-

Y/N: *singing* AND IIIIIIIIIIII WILL ALWAYSSS LOVE YOUUUUUUU-

[witchthewriter]

Cassian: I don’t think we can mansplain, manipulate or manwhore our way out of this one guys...

Azriel: Manslaughter it is then. 

[theydidntactuallysaythis]

kamala: i made you a friendship bracelet! carol, monica, and i have matching ones and i made goose a matching collar too

fury: you know, i don't really wear jewelry...

kamala: oh ok well you don't have to-

fury: back the fuck off this is mine im wearing it

[i-only-see-daylight]

*Having a family dinner*

Amren: Can you pass the pepper?

Cassian: What’s the magic word?

Amren: *Clearly not impressed*

Amren: *Starts chanting in the old language*

Cassian: *Panicking and shoving pepper into Amren's hands* JUST TAKE IT! TAKE IT, OH MY GOD!

[marvel-lous-guy]

Fury: Stark, you were way out of line last mission. You need to obey Rogers orders next time

Tony: I don't like being told what to do unless I'm naked

Fury: ...

Tony: And I'm assuming it's a hazard for me to be naked on a mission

Scott: I for one would be honored to be in your naked presence

Tony: ...Thank you Scott

[nam-ski]

Fury doesn’t knows who Spider-Man is, so the mission for the Avengers is to take him down, Tony gives zero fuck and continues the lab days, movie nights and sleepovers.

One day after Peter designed a new suit he swung around to see how it fits. The Avengers just hanging out in the living room than Spider-Man swings in makes himself a cacao and swings out.

In the meeting after this:

Tony: Oh, I just forget too tell you

Fury: I hate you, so who is he

Tony: I’m not telling you

Fury: [so done with all] I hate my life [walks out of the room]

Tony: There it goes

Fury: [from far away] but I hate you more

[ragingemini]

Bucky: Will Steve and I be gay lovers in this undercover mission?

Fury: No, as I said this is not neccessary.

Bucky:

[incorrectacotarblog]

Rhysand: who got an STD? I need you to fuck someone for me

Azriel: calling an STD hit is absolutely insane

Cassian: biological whorefare

[acomaflove]

Rhysand and Azriel: *walk into the room laughing*

Feyre: SHHHHHH! You’ll wake the baby.

Rhysand, whispering: I thought Mor was babysitting Nyx tonight?

Feyre: She is.

Rhysand:

Feyre:

Azriel:

Rhysand, LOUDLY whispering: THEN WHO IS THE BABY?!?

Feyre: *points to Cassian passed out on the sofa*

Rhysand: You did not just refer to a 500+ year old war general as a BABY.

Feyre: Correction: An Illyrian Baby.

[acourtofmishapandmistakes]

Nesta: You know, Rhysand gives Feyre flowers everyday. I wish you'd do that too.

Cassian: Okay.

Later that same day.

Cassian, handing Feyre flowers:

Feyre:

Cassian: I don't know, I'm confused as well.

[velidewrites]

Rhysand: My standards are very high, actually. I prefer well-mannered, graceful—

Feyre: *stumbles into the room, covered in mud and blood, wyrm carcass thrown over her shoulder*

Rhysand:

Rhysand: I want that one