#great bunch of lasses

[themancorialist]

Piccadilly Approach, Manchester.

[eksvaized]

let's play a game

one-shot

John "Soap" MacTavish x reader

word count: 1251

You should’ve known better than to make a bet with MacTavish; your refusal to back down from a challenge made you an easy target for him - he knew just what to say and how to lure you into joining yet another one of his silly games.

The barracks were empty as you crept down the hallway, keeping your side glued to the wall, and trying to avoid bumping into closed doors. The constant need to check over your shoulder every few seconds revealed the overwhelming sense of being stalked, which engulfed your body, making your heart race with unease.

Despite your awareness that no actual harm awaited you, the sight of MacTavish chasing you induced a torrent of sweat and sent adrenaline coursing through your veins. The sound of pounding footsteps echoed in your ears, intensifying the palpable sense of urgency.

You could hear MacTavish’s voice taunting you, and you knew he was near. But you couldn't see him, and the knowledge that he could be anywhere heightened your anxiety, making you feel like helpless prey in the clutches of a relentless hunter.

Your goal was to elude him for thirty minutes. So you and he were playing catch because you didn’t want to agree that he was faster than you.

But now it has become clear that outrunning him was impossible, forcing you to shift your strategy and rely on hiding as your best chance for success. But you couldn’t locate any good hiding spots, so you were still aimlessly roaming around the empty hallways, attempting to drag out the time till it ran out.

“You can’t hide from me, lass.” You could tell by the tone of his voice, and despite not seeing him, he had the biggest smirk plastered across his face.

He continued speaking, his voice then getting louder, making you realise he was about to corner you. “I can smell that sweet perfume of yours… makes it easy for me to track you.”

The footsteps reverberated at the end of the hallway, heavy boots stomping against the tiles. You should have turned around and run, but your body froze and you couldn’t move your feet. Your eyes widened, your pupils dilated, and you sucked in a sharp breath, desperate to remain unnoticed by not making a single sound.

Still, choosing to stay put wasn't a viable solution since he would eventually detect your presence, and opting to run away wasn't a practical choice either since he would ultimately catch you.

You cautiously retraced your steps, each movement deliberate and noiseless. Your eyes remained fixed on the dimly lit corridor ahead, straining to detect any signs of MacTavish. Pressed against the cool wall, you could feel its rough texture against your side as you inched backwards. Nervously, your fingers clutched the fabric of your shirt, the material bunching tightly in your grip.

You were doing a great job of being invisible and not making a sound until you stumbled over your feet and crashed into a door.

“Fuck.” You murmured and straightened your back, your heart sinking to your knees.

“Ahh, here you are.” MacTavish said and your eyes widened when he stopped at the end of the hallway, revealing himself.

He folded his arms over his chest, creating a slight rustle of fabric. Tilting his head to the side, he revealed a mischievous smirk that slowly spread across his face. His eyes, intense and focused, locked onto you, piercing through the air with a silent challenge, daring you to run.

“The game is not over.” You pointed out, trying to stand straight and not tremble, hoping your appearance didn’t reveal how nervous you were on the inside.

A tangible tension had settled, ready to burst, but nothing appeared to happen, and you and he entered a long stare-off, standing at opposite ends of the hallway, watching each other, waiting to see who would dare to make the first move.

You expected him to chase after you, but he stood still, as if attempting to taunt you, wanting to prove that even with a head start, you can’t outrun him.

“We have ten more minutes, but I plan to be done with the game… and finish with you.. in the next five.” His arms fell back to his sides as he clicked his tongue. His blue eyes darkened, and his smirk became bigger. He took one step forward, his tongue running across his lips. “I give you three seconds before I…”

He didn’t need to finish the sentence since you had already turned around and started running, not daring to waste a second, knowing that you would need all the time you could get to get him off your tail.

You heard him chuckle, then a three-second countdown and boots thumping down the hallway as he chased you down.

Your heart raced as you pushed yourself to your limits, running, gasping for breath, and feeling the strain in every muscle.

You made your way through the never-ending maze of hallways. Each time you turned, your boots slipped over the tiles, making you slide and wobble.

You had to come to a halt eventually, but when you looked over your shoulder, you saw MacTavish wasn’t behind you.

You kept looking around, the hushed sounds of your breathing echoing in the silence.

He was gone.

You exhaled in relief. A little more and this game will be over.

Two arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you backwards, making a loud scream elude you, as your back collided with something solid. You were panicking for a moment, but when MacTavish’s laugh reached your ears, you calmed down and stopped trashing in his embrace.

“I told you.. can’t hide from me.” He whispered, pressing your body closer to his.

Your lips parted, but you said nothing.

You despised losing, and you hated letting him win even more, but you didn’t have time to dwell on your defeat because you were too distracted by him and being trapped in his arms.

While his one arm held you close, his hand moved upwards, coming to rest just above your heart, where he could feel its strong, rhythmic beats.

“I didn’t mean to scare you.” He said, his voice still merely a whisper. The moment his fingers grazed your shirt, it felt as if they were leaving behind a trail of heat, slowly burning through the fabric.

“You didn’t scare me.” You replied, but only because you had a bad habit of wanting to always disagree with him.

He laughed again, his laugh reverberating in his chest, making goosebumps run down your body.

With fear gone, your attention shifted to MacTavish's presence, his body glued to yours, and the undeniable sensation of something hard pressing against your backside.

His fingertips trailed down your arms, causing you to lean on him more.

“Since I won…” He dipped his head when his fingers curled around your hips. “What’s going to be my prize?”

Your tongue ran across your bottom lip as you shrugged. You were glad that you weren’t facing him, because you were blushing and your chest was flushed.

“Whatever you want it to be.” “Whatever I want, hm?” His breath caressed your skin, making you squirm.

You didn’t push him away.

“Yes.” You nodded your head before looking over your shoulder when you felt the redness in your cheeks cool off. “What do you want?”

His intense gaze held yours, and he leaned in, his nose nearly touching yours, creating a tingling sensation in the air.

“I want you.”

[the-fandom-is-now-my-life]

Over tea

Tea can either bring people together to enjoy it or start senseless fights. How interesting

Wc: ~900

Your liking of tea has always been one of the few things known about you by the public. Other than your face or name, nothing much was known.

A perfect blank page for anyone to dream about any scenario they want.

" I just know it! One of the secretaries spoke as she stirred her coffee " great sage YN and mister al-haitham MUST be an item! Totally confirmed" She blushed lightly, imagining one of the steamy book cover that she managed to buy in Inazuma

The rest of the group looks at her attentively, this is one of their common lunch talks. Paperwork, unreasonable workers, talking shit about their boss and gossip about their favorite pair

" Oh?" The golden eyes of one of the boys open wide as does his mouth, letting out a bit of food " how are you so sure even?"

" Hear this'' she leans towards the table as if she was about to tell a top secret " al-haitham was on his desk, as usual right?" The rest of the group looked at her with total attention, breaths hitched "I had to deliver a letter but when I was about to enter I saw the great sage next to al-haitham so obviously I didn't enter. I didn't want to ruin my OTP's moment-"

" You just wanted to eavesdrop but sure "

" Shush! So I stood by listening and they were really like ' oh, haitham, you should take a break from work for a moment. We could go to my office and drink some tea' all while being very touchy feely and al-haitham kinda smiles knowingly before going so I had to leave the letter in the door -"

" Ehem!" One of the matra touches her shoulder, quickly dimming the environment " care to repeat that?"

Jumping from her chair she looks wide-eyed at the matra followed by two other matras " I swear I didn't mean to eavesdrop it was only an acc-"

The blond one steps ahead crossing his arms ready to fight " that is the problem! The problem is lying blatantly about possible affairs from the great sage! Everyone knows great sage and cyno are in love

" Obviously! And you said you stood by the door? Then how would you have known they were touchy feely and if he smiled or not! Only lies!"

The oldest steps in, trying to calm the other two down, seemingly he is their senior " you two only came because you wanted to warn them about lying about a public figure. Either way, young lass, do you know how severe lying about this is?"

Grasping the fabric around her chest she stands her ground, facing against the supposed 'boss' " I might have exaggerated with the touching part but the great sage WAS inside mister Al-haitham's office and they DID offer him to drink tea at their private office".

The blond one jumps in place, an offended look on his face " even then! How would you ever think they would fall in love with such a straight faced dull man!"

Sara gasps looking at him " straight faced! That is flavorful coming from you! You mean to say Cyno, the general mahatma is more expressive than mister al-haitham! I'm so sorry but that is plainly untrue!"

" I have only seen your so beloved 'misteir il-haithim" frown! I know you low level workers don't know how hard the sages' work is they need someone reliable and comforting like Cyno!"

The other matra chimes in rising reasons why Cyno is better than al-haitham, to each of them his coworker nods, while their superior looks somewhat embarrassed " Cyno has a whole personality outside of his job! He likes card games, he is protective of his friends, reliable, funny!"

Tte oldest gives a broken smile " O-Oh well maybe that one…"

" UP FOR DISCUSSION! But either way the great sage YN always laughs at his jokes!"

" Huh?!

"As cynos unofficial big brothers we have to help him get his happiness! He only relaxes when the great sage YN is around. I will not allow you bunch to sully it with senseless rumors"

" Yeah, plus Cyno spent three weeks next to the great sage! Obviously there should be something there"

The chubby and meek girl stands up " Well most of that time was spent believing the sage was a criminal! I wouldn't date anyone who thought that of me!"

The lanky matra gets closer, visibility mad by the vein in his neck " Cyno was only doing his job!"

" And?! I don't think my trust could easily be built if his first impression of me was that of a criminal!"

Looking down the window you look at the busy streets beaming with light and sound " I'm happy everything is as calm as usual" you say softly as you lean against your lover's chest, faintly smelling the white tea from his mug and his mouth. You wonder, would his lips taste like white tea?

He nods before resting his head on your own, closing his eyes and wrapping his arms around you as if he was about to sleep with a teddy bear

No longer caring about making hypotheses, you give him a quick kiss, lingering around his face to notice any reaction. Looking carefully you see his lips turn the slightest upwards and his pale hair hiding the sprinkle in his eyes. Leaning down he gives a light kiss on your cheek

He tastes like tea, a lightly orange blossom taste lingering on the tip of your tongue. How much will the taste change if you add raspberries? Or maybe Jazmine? You will have to check then, surely your handsome lover wouldn't refuse any affection under the alibi of sharing a cup of tea

[blingblong55]

To drive or not to drive- 141

Based on a request:

can you imagine medic!reader where she's like super tiny and young like 141 was her third assignment and if anything she's like only 3 years younger than johnny but by GOD she looks like a kid. and everyone thinks she's like this poor little private O-1 who got shoved in here. and then one night she got invited with the group to go out and as they're sitting at the bar, Johnny's like...are you even old enough to be here? and shes like if im old enough to stick everyone here with vaccines, i think i can drink a fruity cocktail and everyone's like but you can't even drive and readers like i never learnt how and basically the whole team just realized that reader's age and experience does not match up. like they don't know how to drive a car but damnit they just drove a humvee to amputate a man's leg in the field??

F!Reader, Medic!Reader

As the current youngest member of Task Force 141 and the only one who isn't as tall as the men you work with, always get asked, 'How the hell did they think you'd be a great match?'. And with all honesty, you don't even know that yourself. Tonight, as part of them trying to get to know you, they invited you to have some drinks with them. To the better judgement of Laswell, you accepted.

"I tell ya, lass 'ere is such a wee 'ittle thing, I bet she can't even down a drink."

"False, I can...I'm old enough to do as I please, a matter of fact." You look at the men, and all amused you finally speak up. Soap was always the one to make the most comments on who you are, your knowledge and your age. "Yeah? 're yer sure yer can even be in'ere?"

"Yes...I may not be the strongest of the bunch or the fact I am no tall man with abs and weird veiny arms..but if I can make the decision whether or not you to inject morphine in your body is enough proof. To decide if I should ease the pain of a wound inflicted by the enemy should be enough to tell you I am not defined by my appearance." You take a sip from your drink.

Ghost is impressed by your words but will never admit that to you or anyone. Gaz never took your knowledge and the way you spoke for granted rather he licked it so much he could listen to you day after day. "Couldn't even work a car if asked.." his thick Scottish accent hinting at the defeat, he loved to mess with you because you were such an easy target for his jokes. "That is true, never cared to learn." You don't deny the fact you never learnt which only fed into Soap's jokes for the future.

The other men then understood that although you weren't as they were, tall, strong and dangerous men..you, in your own ways, medical-wise, were just like them. One thing did matter here though, your age and knowledge were so far off the other, 23-year-olds are so different from medics, with the precision enough to inflict pain if needed only to gain a soldier more time to live. You might not drive or be tall and have veiny arms that look like they'll just burst at any given moment, but you were one thing..split in two. A medic, capable of anything to save a life and a human...not afraid to tell others you didn't and haven't mastered or even dare learn to drive.

It was 2 o'clock, Soap in the med bay and you with a small smirk, satisfied he had to seek you after the injury he gave himself while walking back from the pub. Maybe if he learned to close wounds and you'd learn to drive, things would be different.

A/N: Pointless ig...but it's something I suppose.

[waitmyturtles]

THE MORNING AFTER: ONLY FRIENDS, EPISODE 2 ("I PROMISED YOU THE MOONSHINE") EDITION

Being a day late to watching and writing about Only Friends allows me a little airspace away from the gasps and dopamine of the collective community first watch of each episode, and lemme tell ya -- my dash yesterday was so hot, it was like melting Tupperware on a stove. Unfortunately for many in the fandom, the ships are going to sink. That shower scene got some folks wrecked. Many folks on my dash have a sudden disdain for Neo Trai (poor kiddo). For anyone who reads around here, you might remember my implored begging of the Tumblr family to watch Gay OK Bangkok before Only Friends premiered, and I still stand by it. The Only Friends team -- Jojo Tichakorn, Ninew Pinya, writers Den Panuwat and Best Kittisak -- are playing with a lot of concepts that I thought were just FABULOUSLY explored in this second episode, and these concepts ARE going to lead to further innuendos and endings that the shippers are just not going to like. (I think GOKB primed us for this.) And frankly, by the way this episode played out (as we were talking about a couple days ago, @lurkingshan) -- I think that's a hell of a point that the team is making in our faces.

I'm going to get to this more in a moment. Let me explain more, by way, of all things (!) -- plum wine.

So a bunch of us meta clowns (cc @ranchthoughts, @chickenstrangers, @lurkingshan) were talking about a theory I had on Friday regarding the theme of ephemerality in the first episode. How Cheum indicated to Mew that there's a lot in Thailand that'll bring them down, from pollution to radiation. She wanted Mew to nab Top -- she indicated that life is fickle, so what did her homeboy have to lose? Go get yer man, she said.

@ranchthoughts, @chickenstrangers, @lurkingshan and I took this conversation further yesterday (please read all the reblogs on this link, folks, it's a great conversation!), exploring the many more references to the ephemeral, fickle nature of time and life that Only Friends is referencing. @chickenstrangers clocked that Yo's bar is called YOLO. @ranchthoughts clocked that Sand's bag of plum wine read "you only live once." @lurkingshan noted that Jojo's played around with the ephemeral before -- in Gay OK Bangkok, examining the impact of HIV on Bangkok's gay male population.

The reblogs of the post linked above also capture some common mentalities about the "future" for our current crop of young folks today (I... am not young, lol), particularly for the young queer community. That through climate change, the slow-snail-paced fight for equity (like the legalization of same-sex marriage in Thailand) (and even comparing it to the roll-back of rights for the LGBTQ+ community in the States) -- as @ranchthoughts wrote, there seems to be a stronger sense of "live fast, die young," among younger cohorts than when I was a young lass, born in the 1980s, when a middle management career could get you everything you needed, with a unfettered retirement in sight.

To me, the most wrenching references to the ephemeral in this second episode focused on death. "Do you want us to die?," Sand asked laughingly as Ray played around in the car. Top can't sleep alone because after a childhood trauma, he's afraid he'll die alone. Ray's deceased mom is shown with a glass in her hand.

And how are these young folks behaving? In the face of literal death, as they themselves are referring to it: they're living life very riskily. Top's a player. So is Boston. We hope they're playing safe. (Gay OK Bangkok had condoms all over the place. I haven't seen any yet in OF.) Ray's blood alcohol levels are clearly through the roof. Sand's committing a crime.

Say what now? Committing a crime?

I hope folks clocked that. What's REALLY making me shake my head is how slick the non-sexual commentary was in this episode.

Going back to my original post on ephemerality that I let loose on Friday: I talked about the metaphor of plum wine and the passage of time -- how plum wine tastes sweeter and better as you let it age.

Sand was pissed that his bottles of plum wine broke because he's making it himself. That's why he wanted Ray to pay him back for the lost supply. Sand lost both product AND time.

Making and selling plum wine is illegal in Thailand. It's like the selling of rotgut during Prohibition.

SAY WHAT? For real. Thailand's laws around alcohol are wild, y'all. The display of alcohol logos is weirdly regulated (I laugh at how bottles are often blurred out in Thai dramas), brewing alcohol within Thailand is insanely complicated (some people brew alcohol in Thailand, then bottle it elsewhere and import it BACK into Thailand to skirt these laws), and -- you cannot buy alcohol from 2 pm to 5 pm.

Remember we saw Ray sneaking some sips from a flask outside the hostel site? That's a major flag for confirmed alcoholism (drinking alone during the day). But also, if Ray wanted a drink during the hours of 2-5 pm -- he had to have the booze on himself to have a tipple.

We know Jojo does NOT shy away from political commentary. We saw it in spades during Dirty Laundry.

What I love about Jojo's work is that he's unafraid to call out the hypocrisy of these kinds of laws. The making of plum wine is ILLEGAL? In Japan, making umeshu is traditional. (It's also the easiest and most delicious thing ever, please try making it!). For many of us around the world, making umeshu is a hobby, and a perfectly safe one at that. Considering Thailand's economy is so dependent on tourism, and that Bangkok itself is a world-class city, you would think that the selling of alcohol wouldn't be so complicated, and yet... 'tis.

This leads me to what I saw as the second Big Theme of this episode, besides ephemerality: I saw a lot of hypocrisy in this episode.

We got the liquor laws bullshit. We got Boston. Boston strikes me as a hypocrite for setting up his friend Mew with Top -- all while Boston's still wanting to get with Top, to the point of sneaking into Top's shower.

And Mew strikes me as a hypocrite, too. He wants to "redo" the start of his relationship with Top?... on his own terms? So, they're not boyfriends anymore? After already....having dated? Believable, my dude. The guys are in a PatPran-esque battle of... something, and I don't think it's wits, because neither of them seem to have many wits about them. They seem to be more interested in just winning a goal that (except for sex for Top) seems wholly unclear. Does Mew not know that Top may very well NOT respect Mew? Is Mew aware that his read on Top may not be at all accurate? And.... does Mew actually care? I'm not convinced of it.

Live fast, die young. What does it matter to be a hypocrite if the future is unstable, if time is speeding by -- and if no one is holding these young folks accountable for their behavior, as I put into the tags of @ranchthoughts's post yesterday? As Nick says to Boston: "you're a rich guy -- you don't care much for things." What, exactly, would make these rich kids care about being ethical human beings?

Accountability is around the corner for this group. Nick is starting to catch feelings. Boston is wondering why he's getting rejected by Top. Sand's recognizing that Ray's sniffing out something between them (cc @neuroticbookworm) (and, who knows, as NBW first referenced in her post -- Sand might be catching feelings, too). All of these friends -- it's mindblowing! -- leave Ray alone, often, wasted off his ass, to get himself home, as Sand himself notes.

These characters are going to get hurt, and it's only a matter of time until we begin seeing it happen. At the micro-level, human to human, they will hurt each other. And society, Thai society, is doing these young people no favors by not helping to equalize the inequity between rich and poor -- as Sand has to take risks to sell illegal hooch, of all things, to just get by.

Wrapping this up with what I was mentioning up at the top about the jibbles that the fandoms are starting to feel towards the established GMMTV ships of this show slowly sinking. Isn't there a bit of hypocrisy there as well? This show is NOT going to be pretty for the ForceBook/FirstKhao established ships. What are we, as fans, going to do when that time comes? Will we condemn Jojo? Will we stop watching the show? Will we equivocate by way of blaming other characters?

This show should be celebrated already for the risks it's taking, and the risks it will take. (Remember: fans protested at the GMMTV building in 2019 when the KristSingto ship was broken for He's Coming To Me.) Only Friends deciding to take on the toxicity and hypocrisy of shipper fandom? Bring it on. We cannot only enjoy the performances of these actors when they're paired up with one repeating partner. As the life of Gay OK Bangkok depicted, as the life of Only Friends is depicting -- life is a whole lot more complicated than just a dreamlike, over-organized monogamy between two people (ahem, Mew). Life -- and TIME -- will bring complications and change, sometimes unwanted change, that we have to learn to handle and manage. I'm not colored surprised in the least that Jojo's making this experience for us jump out of the screen and into our own hearts, as we see our beloved actors take risks upon themselves by their breaking of their own ships. I am all here for it, and I hope the shipper fans can be, too.

(BIG UPS to the small meta army family -- @ranchthoughts, @lurkingshan, @chickenstrangers, @neuroticbookworm -- I'm so thrilled to continue being thoughtful with y'all!)

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Here's an interesting request. It mostly focuses on the reader finally making the perfect version of the Butcher Gang (Including Carley)

Whoever thought it was a great idea to "reverse-engineer" the Butcher Gang to fix their monstrous appearances was clearly an idiot.

It was sloppy work, only succeeding in making them look even worse than the first time they emerged from the Machine. And it never stopped cranking out clones of them, who eventually overran many parts of the studio and led to Lost Ones and all other trapped within fear them.

They weren’t even called their original names anymore..only Piper, Striker, Fisher, and Slicer.

It was quite sad that people like Allison didn’t remember their true names. You always knew them as Charley, Edgar, Barley, and Carly.

Yes, even you considered Carley to be a worthy member of the gang, a tough and sassy lass. You adored the idea of her in the cartoons, but unfortunately her creator’s dream was never realized, as both of them became the laughing stock of JDS.

After replaying Jane’s tape a few times, you understood how much this character resonated with her. It reminded you of Susie and Alice Angel’s connection, in a way, but you knew how that turned out--with them becoming one and the same, striving for beauty and perfection that was always somehow just out of their reach.

Though now that the studio’s power was in your hands, you could improve upon things within the Cycle. You were able to make significant changes that guaranteed a better life for everyone trapped inside.

Among them? Giving Susie the perfection she desired.

But then you wondered, ‘why can’t I do the same with the Butcher Gang?’

After all, you pitched the idea of bringing the crew back when Archgate purchased the franchise. Despite them being the show’s antagonists, you wanted them to have a sense of wholeness, too.

While you may never know what happened to Jane, you hoped to at least make Carley an official part of the gang; if not in the real world, then perhaps in this world it was possible.

But unfortunately, even she faced rejection here, as during your first trip in the Cycle, you found a Slicer shoved into a crate near that tape. She seemed dead, though the moment you looked away...she was gone.

True to her character, she was quite the trickster, with aggression to boot as she would startle you often. She’d lunge out at you when you least expected it, swiftly retreating to the ink pipes before you can catch her. And you’d have little time to think as irritable Lost Ones would come along to investigate the commotion.

Fortunately, you’re now able to anticipate her better, keeping the crate shut tight in some Cycles, while in other you tried out ways to contain her with little success.

But you finally devised a method, believing you could finally give her the life her creator wanted:

One with a perfect Butcher Gang quartet.

The first order of business was capturing the clones with the help of traps set up by Porter, Tom, Allison, Bendy, and Henry. Then you banished all the ones you could until no more could be found.

Back in the real world, you were at the drawing board--in a literal sense--and made a bunch of 2D references to run through the Machine, before returning to the studio to see what happens. 

It was just a series of trial-and-error. Some clones emerged as monsters, others far worse..and some even fused together.

You had no idea how all of those perfect Boris clones were created. Even the Ink Demon had doubts that you’ll succeed (though only because he still has that same grudge against them, akin to his toon counterpart).

Nevertheless, you refused to give up.

Then one day you visited Little Devil’s Lounge...and finally made a breakthrough:

At one of the tables sat four perfect Butcher Gang members right before your very eyes.

Charley, Edgar, Barley, and even Carley were all there. They were apparently gambling on slugs, as you heard the clinking of coins and laugher that sounded perfectly normal for their characters. Carley was arm-wrestling with Barley, as the other two cheered them on, applauding as she won the first round.

Your heart was soaring with joy, seeing them so alive and animated. 

You did it! 

After putting all of your blood, sweat, tears, and ink into this project...you made them real!

As much as you wanted to meet them right away, they seemed to be having a grand old time by themselves. You didn’t wanna startle them like you did when you saw Bendy for the first time.

Besides, considering they’re an actual gang, they might just bring you trouble, seeing as the toons here still didn’t take too kindly to their creators. You understood this as shared resentment over Joey, but it would be a while before they ever warmed up to you.

Maybe another day you’ll introduce yourself to them. You were satisfied with just seeing them in the inky flesh.

So you simply smiled and walked away without them noticing you, eager to tell your friends the great news.

‘It seems dreams do come true down here, after all..’

[aemiron-main]

why don’t u ever post about patty

?

Hey, anon!

So, I a.) have already posted analyses heavily involving Patty and b.) i have a bunch of drafts about her and i am slow to finish my drafts LMAO like i have. 600 analysis drafts on tumblr total right now (not including stuff thats in my google docs) and lots of them involve Patty/are focused on her.

I post about stuff when I have time- I'm generally a busy guy, I'm currently trying to get two huge ST youtube videos finished while also juggling art stuff, work stuff and other IRL stuff.

But anyway, here's a list of my current Patty-centric drafts:

1.) Patty Newby vs Patricia Pulling

2.) Miss Mystery vs Mystra from DND

3.) In-Depth Analysis of The Catwalk Scene in TFS

4.) The Anomaly: What's Up With Patty? Why Is Patty The Anomaly? (ft Star Trek and The Matrix)

5.) TFS vs The Matrix and Patty Newby's Parallels to Both Neo and The Oracle

6.) The Resemblance is Uncanny: Patty Newby vs The Uncanny Valley

7.) His Great Shame, The Girl He Stole: Patty Newby, Changelings, Foundlings, and Stolen Children in ST

8.) A Few Steps From The Unexpected Edge: Edges, Mothers in ST, TFS and Patty Newby

9.) The Nurses Are Prisoners Too: S1 Newspapers, Donna Lass, TFS, Patty Newby and Henry's Cipher

10.) Doomed From The Start: Henry and Patty, Cujo, Hal 9000, and The Dark Of The Moon

11.) Then, Out Of Nowhere, He Walked In and It Was Like Something Had Changed (ft The Girl From Nowhere)

12.) Orphans and Small Women: Patty Vs Suzie, Orphan (2009), and NINA Being A Small Woman

13.) Mystery Meat vs Virginia's Meatloaf

14.) Magic Meatball vs Magic 8 Ball

15.) Three To The Right, Four To The Left: Patty vs Terry, Keys and Locks

16.) The World Is Full of Obvious Things Which Nobody By Any Chance Ever Observes: Patty's Sherlock Holmes Coat And Her Weird Connections To The Creel House

17.) It Wouldn't Be Make Believe If You Believe In Me: Believing in ST

18.) Patty vs The Wasp Woman

And im sure there's other drafts in my huge pile that I'm forgetting about right now because there always is! Not to mention all the notes I have re: Patty that I just haven't turned into actual drafts yet (see: TFS vs Nightmare on Elm Street 2 and Patty's parallels there) So, yeah! Those'll be up once they're done, anon!

[shyminmin]

༄𝐁𝐓𝐒 𝐗 𝐟.𝐑𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 | Fantasy, Mermaid AU | ༄𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 : 2.1k + ༄𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : Very mild angst and course language

Ok Y/n, you've got this!

All you've got to do is ask a bunch of strangers if they know anything about your tragic past. No big deal.

Nerves racked through my body as I stood, dithering outside the inn.

Looking up and down the street I sought out my first victim who would have to put up with my crazy, awkward self. Like yesterday, the town seemed almost deserted, the only company being the screeching seagulls flying overhead and the prickly innkeeper who I learnt was named Ms Jee.

I had attempted to ask her some questions first but she abruptly cut me off.

"Hun, I don't get paid to answer questions about this dingy old town, and the lowlives in it. Do I look like I want to be here?" She stared at me condescendingly.

Words were caught in my throat, not knowing how to reply.

Huffing she had waved me off and proceeded to continue doing her makeup, looking in her flip up mirror, all while saying "Life's a bitch, you can try but in the end, we all can't get what we want".

Sweat was dripping from my temples by the time I stepped outside away from her. A great start to my search indeed.

I slowly began to walk along the street hoping to come across someone. Luckily I wore a sunhat, otherwise the blistering rays of the sun would surely burn me to a crisp. Oh how you've got to love the summer heat. At least being right by the ocean gave me somewhat of a breeze.

I had been scanning the place for a few minutes thinking I was never going to find another soul until finally, up ahead, coming out of a building, I spotted a group of three elderly men. They were all carrying fishing poles and buckets, looking like they were about to go out and catch something. An easygoing conversation was getting tossed about between their raspy voices and every so often they bellowed over in laughter from inside jokes.

Maybe they would know, they seem like locals.

Mustering up some courage, I quicken my pace to catch up with them. They seemed friendly enough, so talking might be easier. The crunching of gravel below my steps alerted one of them and like dominos they all turned towards me.

"Good mornin' to ya lil lady, can we help you with somethin'?"

I blushed at their use of words, my shyness not letting me look them directly in the face.

"H-hello! Sorry to bother you. Would you happen t-to know where Mr and Mrs Yang live?"

They all looked between each other and back towards me gobsmacked, their eyes widening making sure I wasn't somehow messing with them.

"What would a young lass like you want with an old grump like Chinhae?" The one in the middle asked, lifting a brow.

"Well... I guess you could say he's the one who saved my life."

Silence fell upon the group, whether it was from shock or awe, I had no clue, their expressions too hard to decipher. The distant sounds of waves crashing on the shore was the only thing that could be heard.

I gulped, waiting in anticipation for a reply, wondering whether it would be positive or negative.

Then like a dam breaking, all three of the fishermen shouted out responses all at once.

"Oh dear Buddha, you're that baby!"

"You came back, you were so small, now look at ya!"

"Wow I can't believe that ol' Chin Chin sent you away!"

I stepped back, a little overwhelmed by their raised voices and comments.

"Y-you know about me?" I let out, baffled.

"Of course, my dear! A small town like this where everyone knows each other, my word we know of ya!" The one on the left said with endearment, a gentle smile adorning his wrinkled face.

"It's not everyday you find a poor lil baby washed up on shore in this boring ol' dump. Surprisin' how ya survived bein' in that cold water for so long! T'was a miracle."

Optimism was starting to surround my previous hopeless assumptions. Maybe finding the missing puzzle pieces to my life would prove to be easier than I thought. My heart pumped faster, eager to have every detail thrown at me right this instant. After all I have been waiting for a good 21 years, I think I deserve to say that I have been more than patient.

"I-If it's not too much to ask, w-would you mind telling me more about back then? Anything at all, it would mean the world to me." I was practically pleading at this point. Clasping my hands together, I did a respective bow.

Making out sounds of protest, I felt a hand draw my head back up so I was looking them in the face.

"Stop with this formal nonsense." The third man tutted. "It would be our pleasure to tell you what we know."

"As for getting the whole story, you were right in asking for Yangy boy. However I must warn you dear child, he doesn't take too kindly to company these days, not since he's been widowed."

"Oh..." my heart sank, "I had n-no idea."

All the newspaper articles and police reports only stated what happened at the time of the incident and the married couple who found me back then. I didn't take into account that they could've possibly moved or passed away.

God I'm so stupid!

"Don't fret lass, you couldn't have known" the elder pat my shoulder trying to reassure me.

"Ol' Chin Chin lives away aways north along the coast, about 10 kilometers yonder. If ye would allow, after our story tellin' we could give you a ride up there."

"No, I can't ask you to do that after you're already doing so much for me. A-And it looks like I've already interrupted your fishing trip" I said eyeing their gear.

"Well ain't ye the thoughtful one. Not to worry, our recreation can wait, not when a sweet damsel is in need of help. Lads don't keep the lady waiting and put our stuff back in the shop" The middle man ordered, making his two companions playfully scoff.

Splitting into groups of two we went our separate ways. The middle fisherman led me up the street a little further, eventually stopping in front of what I assumed to be a cafe of some sort if the name 'Seaside Chow' was anything to go by.

Being a gentleman he opened the door for me, ushering me in.

Sitting around one of the many tables in the almost empty establishment, the three men had called out to the waitress asking for their usual and insisted on paying for my order too, which consisted of a simple coffee and muffin.

I tried reasoning with them that they didn't have to but I guess it's hard to change older people's minds. They had firmly put their foot down and didn't even want to see me taking out my wallet.

The cafe held a relaxing ambiance, where anyone could come in and just turn off for the day if they wanted to. The same wooden theme that the whole town seemed to sport was showcased just as much within these calming walls, portable fans turned on to the highest setting as they tried to circulate the scorching summer air.

Once everything was placed on the table, I reached for my mug taking a sip of the bitter beverage, enjoying the sensation.

"Now where should we start?" The man who escorted me here asked to himself, rubbing his chin in thought.

"Ah yes, when Chinhae and Yeona brought ye down, the whole town pitched in to help, ye were a lil pint sized thing that's for sure, wrapped in all those blankets."

"Yeona, y-you mean Mrs Yang?"

"Ai, she was always such a caring gal, never understood what she saw in Chin Chin, he was always such a grouch. She was cradling you like her life depended on it when she came, handling you with such care. It was only natural that she insisted that they adopt you when your parents didn't show. She treated you like you were her own."

Clutching my cup tighter, I listened on, eager to learn more.

"As ye grew, we would always find you roaming around the town or carrying too many seashells that ye hoarded like anything" The middle guy spoke, making all of them chuckle.

"Yeona would always bring you with her whenever she came to visit the shop, ye were a quiet thing but you always had a smile on your face."

They smiled reminiscing about back then, as they continued to ramble on about all the little adventures my child self seemed to go on, making me second guess if the person they were talking about really was me. I never would've thought I was that outgoing and careless as an infant, but then again, I didn't really know much about myself to begin with.

"Everyone adored you. You were like a fresh ocean breeze, having such a bright, young soul running about in this forgotten town."

"What's with those flowery words, I didn't take ya for a poet, Dong Dong" one of the middle man's friends asked. "All that seawater has gotten to ya head."

"Dong Dong..." I sat there confused.

"Don't mind them lass, old age is gettin' to 'em, the name's Dongha but all the folks have other plans in mind."

"Oh... right... I-I didn't catch you other sir's names."

"Sir? Please." The one to the left of Dongha let out. "Call me Myungsoo, and this fella is Sungwon" He said, patting the last man's shoulder.

"And if my memory hasn't failed me, you must be Y/n."

"Y-yes, C-Cheong Y/n" I stated.

Raising a scruffy eyebrow, Dongha huffed, utterly astounded. "Oh I see the bastard didn't even let you use his family name, his wife had to give you her maiden name instead." He said, shaking his head in disappointment. "O'l Chin Chin only let you stay because of his wife if I'm correct. Said something ridiculous about you being a bad omen."

"Now now don't frighten the poor child" Sungwon butted in.

"No no it's fine, I can handle it" I interjected, "Please don't hold off on account of me."

The three men looked to me in sympathy, clearly not wanting to say anything that may offend me or cause me to get upset.

"Well... when Yeona passed, ye would've been around 4 or 5. Chinhae was void of life, shouting out superstitious nonsense to everyone, blaming her misfortune on you." He paused looking to see if I was still ok, when I nodded he continued.

"Us and the other locals were concerned for your safety, you had shown up on more than one occasion with bruising. We were even more devastated to see that he gave you over to the welfare system. Any one of us would've gladly taken custody, however by the time everything was finalized you were already on your way towards a big city."

And the rest is history, I concluded in my head.

Gently placing his old, calloused hand on mine, Dongha made me look up towards him, no doubt trying to provide some sort of reassurance.

"Know this lass, whatever the reasons things turned out the way they have, it is far from your fault, and we'll be damned if ya or anyone else says otherwise. No child should ever have to go through all the stuff you did."

Surprisingly, I managed to maintain eye contact, his words striking into parts of my soul that I thought would forever remain cold and numb.

What was this feeling? I felt warm, lighter. Was it because someone other than myself was having my best interests in mind? Providing support? If so then I don't want it to end.

Letting out a shaky thank you, for the first time in however many years, my eyes grew hazy, filled with the saltiness of well overdue tears.

We took some time to get through our food and drinks, all the while the three friends chattered amongst themselves, trying to include me here and there. They were a little worried and shocked when I had erupted into silent tears, however I assured them as they grabbed a loose napkin for me to dry my eyes with, that they were from the surge of comfort that I was feeling all of a sudden.

I was staring off in a light daydream after they had finally stopped, when the chiming of the bell atop of the cafe's entrance went off signaling that someone had arrived.

I looked in the newcomer's direction, simply curious and having nothing else to do at the moment.

Oh, I certainly wasn't prepared for what I would see.

| 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 | 𝐏𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 | 𝐍𝐞𝐱𝐭 | ༄⋆

[ultramagicalternate]

ULTRAMagic Chaos Chapter 2

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Master Post

“And that’s my story,” Tusk said as the three passed a series of rock formations.

Mizuki was utterly amazed by Tusk’s history. “Well then… that uh, kind of makes my story pale in comparison.”

Razor kicked a stone off of the dirt road. “No it doesn’t. My father always told me that no matter how great or whimsical, woes are woes.”

“Agreed,” Tusk replied. “Spill the beans, lass. What’s your story?”

Lass? Did he just call her lass? Normally Mizuki would have given both of them a piece of her mind, but she did not as the two were growing on her. “I was pursuing a terrible and vile demon lord that had been plaguing my family and home land for generations. He fled into The Unlight after a fierce battle with my father and I went after him. Sadly I lost track of him and wandered for a long time. I came to the Realm of Chaos hoping I could get a lead on him.”

Tusk stopped to pick up a sign that had fallen down on the road. “Well I hate to rain on your parade, but that demon lord is either dead or lost to the sands of time, if you’ve been at it for long enough.”

Mizuki gave Tusk the weirdest look, indicating that she was wondering if he even knew what he was talking about. “Are you sure about that?”

He nodded. “You go around picking fights long enough in the Unlight and you’ll eventually bite off more than you can chew.”

Razor noticed that Mizuki was not pleased. “Hey, don’t worry, Mizuki. I’ll help you track him down when we’re done. Scully noses are some of the best in The Unending Forest. And if he’s dead, we’ll find his corpse for closure.”

The oni was a proud warrior, but even she had to admit that was sweet. “Thank you, Razor. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Curiously, how did you achieve your ULTRAMagic?” Tusk inquired.

Mizuki straightened out her mask and cleared her throat. “Well I started training with a woman named Gratiana Arlotti…”

“And she wasn’t with some sleeze named Milosh?”

“No?”

Tusk nodded, as if confirming something. “Alright, continue.”

That was strange. “Anyways, after she taught me what I know about combat now, I went off and began finding soul fragments left and right. The rest came naturally.”

“That’s awesome,” Razor congratulated. “Mine were a mix of asking my friends and finding them out in the forest.”

Tusk appeared to be pondering something. “If you met Gratiana before Milosh, then your demon lord is long gone, Mizuki. I’m sure of it.”

“Well if you’re so insistent about it, just how long ago was my meeting with Lady Arlotti then?”

“Lady?” Tusk laughed. “She didn’t tell you she was a harlot, did she? Anyways, that was a long time ago, possibly before I was born and I’m 32. We’re looking at at least 40 years ago.”

“Wait, how!? I saw Lady Arlotti a year ago!”

“Well that’s nonlinear time for you. Be careful if you’re coming from a realm based in linear time. You could easily leave one moment only to come back a hundred years later by complete accident.”

Razor nodded in support of Tusk. “He’s got a point, Mizuki.”

She took a second to ease her nerves. It did not work. “Okay, FINE! I’ll just go with you on your quest then!”

Tusk approached her calmly. “Easy, Mizuki. Let’s get to Droomopolis where you’ll be able to rest and get your bearings. Then we’ll figure out what to do. Sounds cool?”

Mizuki wanted to stay angry and protest, but she could not. She could tell Tusk had been through a lot in life and that he had her best interests in mind. “Alright…”

“Don’t worry, Mizuki, it’ll all work out. Say, if your demon lord is dead, do you want to join the ULTRAMagic Guild?”

“The ULTRAMagic Guild?” she questioned.

“Yes. Blood is getting together a bunch of mages like us to help keep the Unlight safe. I’ll be out and about, but I’ll be sure to send any ULTRAMagic mages I find his way.”

That sounded quite inviting. “And Blood-Wraith will be the leader of this guild?”

“Well a leader. Deimos is going to track down Tiberius Skull and Alexia Lavoie to also lead the guild.”

“Hey, Tusk?” Razor jumped in. “Can I join too?”

“Well of course you can!” Tusk cried. “Jeez, kid, what did you think I was going to do after this is all said and done? Send you to babysit my niece?”

Razor chuckled. “Sorry, stupid question.”

Tusk then noticed another sign post that was slightly off. Specifically it was pointing in the wrong direction. It shone in the afternoon sunlight once corrected, despite the metal being quite aged and rusted. The two could see Tusk getting excited.

“In the Realm of Chaos, you want your signs to be pointing in the right direction” the treeman eagerly pointed out. “Now come on, Droomopolis ain’t too far away.”

The trio picked up the pace as they passed by more hills and rock formations. As they traveled further, things became more civilized looking. The only strange thing was that any structure they passed by at a certain point looked techno-organic, but even that did not fully capture the nuances of the aesthetic in question. Regardless, the excitement was building as they passed by occasional houses along the countryside.

Passing by a great set of ruins full of floating platforms, the group noticed something was off. They could hear the sounds of clashes and fighting. Quietly climbing the outer wall, they peered inwards while being as silent as possible. At the center of a giant, stone arena were what looked like a demon and a dragon fighting someone.

“Any thoughts, Tusk?” Razor asked in a hushed tone as they hid amongst the large rubble.

“Hmm… The demon in the black and red jester clothes is most likely a devil. The Dragon? He’s a jabberwock, no two ways about it.”

“A jabberwock?” Mizuki was incredibly weirded out by the creature.

“They’re semi-bipedal, flat faced dragons” Tusk answered. “Native to the Realm of Chaos, they’re not common, but certainly powerful. Now as for the guy in the grisly, red armor? I want to see if they confirm my suspicions.”

Over at the fight, the devil was unleashing a flurry of slashes from his dual blades with his enemy doing his best to dodge them. “Well you’re awfully nimble today, Karnage!”

“Mayhem, jump!” the jabberwock called out. Once he had a clear shot, he unleashed a torrent of plasma at Karnage.

The warrior created a shield made of a gruesome, red mass to block the blast. He then noticed Mayhem spinning down towards him in a buzzsaw motion, enveloped in blue and gold flames. “Ha, clever, but not good enough!” Karnage snarled.

Karnage leapt up, rearing his fist towards Mayhem. The devil noticed the attack, but could not respond to it effectively. To combat this, the jabberwock took off, flying in between the two. He caught Mayhem on his back and smacked Karnage to the ground with a swift flick of his tail. The sound of their foe hitting the arena floor was satisfying.

“Thanks for the save, Dragutin!” Mayhem said as he regained his bearings.

“Don’t mention it. I honestly thought we had him that time.”

Karnage was picking himself up as Dragutin landed and let Mayhem down. “Well played…” Karnage growled, clearly tainted by the venom of his anger.

“Uh oh, I think the general is angry” Mayhem taunted as he and Dragutin walked over.

“Bold of you to be out here, Karnage!” Dragutin pointed out. “Discordant War won’t save you if the Arbiters find out what you’re doing.”

“You are arrogant to assume I come here aimlessly, wyrmling…” Karnage could tell that he had offended Dragutin and smiled. “And even if the Arbiters come after me, they’ll just go after that blowhard Wulfric, making my work all the more easier.”

Mayhem pointed a blade at Karnage. “Then if he shall fall, I’ll take his place and kick you into the nearest pit!”

Karnage glared at him with utmost malice. “Petulant little whelp. You won’t be laughing when I get my hands on ULTRAMagic…” he then noticed some rustling at the upper levels of the arena. A maniacal grin stretched across his face. “How intriguing…” Karnage then sank into a rumbling, screaming vortex and vanished from the arena.

Mayhem sighed and put his blades away. “Sometimes I really wish Discordant War would just toss him into a pit of fiery spikes…”

Dragutin readied his leathery wings. “I must concur, Mayhem. Come, we need to tell Ealdhelm about this.”

“What about our audience over there?”

“Leave them be. If they’re heading towards Droomopolis, we’ll surely meet them there.”

“Alright then” Mayhem said as he hopped up on Dragutin’s back. “See you guys in the city!” He called out as they took off.

Once the two were gone, Tusk stuck his head up to see if the coast was clear. “Alright, we’re good,” he said as he sat down on a large brick.

“What was that, Tusk?” Razor wondered as he and Mizuki came out of their hiding spots.

“No doubt about it; that was General Karnage, Wulfric’s champion. He’s always up to no good, even back when I was training with the Arbiters.”

“Do we have any idea on what he wants? Given that he mentioned ULTRAMagic…”

“No idea, or at least, no idea at the moment.” Tusk looked incredibly concerned.

“Well surely the Arbiters can handle him, right?” Mizuki tried to reassure him.

Tusk shifted on his brick. “Yes, but it is the fact that he’s plotting in the first place that has me worried. It’s never a good sign when he’s up to something. His mere existence is never a good sign in the first place.” The treeman groaned and stood up. “I wish Cynneberht was here. He studies these kinds of tactics and whatnot.” He then led Razor and Mizuki back to the road.

Cutting the sight-seeing, Tusk and his companions quickly made their way to Droomopolis. The towering, imposing city was truly a sight to behold. All of it was made of a strange, techno-organic metal that seemed to be alive. Impossible towers were surrounded by great walls that kept the city safe from the unpredictability of the Realm of Chaos. Inside the walls it was a fairly normal city. It had all the hallmarks of the realm, but also a degree of structure and order to it. An eclectic collection of people from all walks of life were going about their daily lives and minding their own business.

Tusk was overwhelmed with happy nostalgia as he pointed out the sights and locations to Razor and Mizuki. Despite Mizuki having been on a quest to avenge her people, Tusk’s joy was infectious. She could not help but smile under her mask. Razor was amazed by the city regardless of the reason they were there. It was awe inspiring and he wanted to explore every inch of the city so he could see all that was possible. Upon walking past a food cart, someone called out to Tusk.

“Well I’ll be damned, Tusk Willfort!” The man had four arms, well kept hair, and appeared to be running a hot dog stand.

“Mr. Lyon, good to see you again! What’s all this? Did the restaurant not take off?”

“Things got a little delayed, so this is a side gig I’m on just to have a little extra spending money here and there” he replied as he began preparing some food. “I’ll concede that I got kind of hooked on this. You've been away for so long. What brings you back on this fine day?”

“Well to put it simply, Ealdhelm needs help and I’ve been sitting on my roots for too long. Oh, Mr. Lyon, these are my traveling buddies, Razor and Mizuki. Razor is Magnus’ son that I’m mentoring at the moment and Mizuki is a warrior we picked up on the road.”

After an exchange of greetings, Mr. Lyon handed each of them a hot dog. “On the house, guys. Welcome back, Tusk” he said as the two shook hands.

“Great to be back.”

“Thanks, Mr. Lyon” said Razor. “I’ll be sure to come around later and buy something.”

“Itadakimasu, Mr. Lyon,” Mizuki thanked as they walked away.

“He’s nice. I like him,” Razor stated in between bites of his food.

Tusk nodded. “Hank has always been a great people-person. Super polite and welcoming, he knows how to treat you and win you over as a regular customer. I’m shocked he hasn’t gotten his diner fully off the ground yet.”

“Some things take time,” Mizuki replied. “A lake isn’t formed in a day.”

“So where are we heading next, Tusk?” Razor inquired.

He finished his hot dog, wiped his face, and threw his trash in a garbage can. “City Hall. I have no doubt that the Arbiters are there. Ooh, I can’t wait to see Ealdhelm and the others again!”

Next: Chapter 2

ULTRAMagic Alternate © 2022 William Ford II (ChaoticTempleKnight)

Jabberwocky © 1871 Lewis Caroll

[lasudio]

VeronaHills, Round Five: McGreggor

The leaves were beginning to rust as Leod McGreggor's barn doors cracked open.

Jonah hung up the string lights and bunched fresh flowers into vases for the final touches, and with that, the McGreggor Market was officially open for business. Leod had long lamented that he could turn more profit from his crops if the Town Centre Grocery middleman was cut out. With Jonah's help, the old barn became a tastefully rustic store spacer. A more profitable period was (theoretically) on the horizon.

Unfortunately for Jonah, his physical prowess didn't translate to operating the till efficiently. One of their first customers was sharp in every sense of the word - faced, dressed, and toned. Jonah doubted she had even touched a cash register in her life, but she scrunched up her face at him regardless, incredulous that he would even dare to be new at the counter... and nearly furious that he wasn't good with numbers!

"Hey Jonah, I'm proud of you," Leod said. "That wasn't just any lass. That was Cordelia Capp. Runs a vineyard on the edge of town, a fancy one. I'm sorry she was hard on you, but try to think of the others who thought we did alright today... alright?"

With these warm and gentle words, Jonah realised the gruff farmer vibe was just one part of Leod. He was also a great mate.

[ameliedoree]

Mysteries of the Sith is Peak Niche Bullshit and I Kinda Love it

Fun fact about me: I play boomer shooters when I'm not doing well. This entire last week has been miserable for me, so I decided, "why don't I *finally* try and play through Dark Forces 2 and it's expansion?" It's a title I've had a love/hate relationship with, primarily because I've tried to play it on Hard mode and that SUCKS. DF2 is a miserable experience on that difficulty for a myriad reasons I will not dive into here because I don't have the mental capacity to talk in great detail about it.

But anyways, I've finally played Dark Forces 2, and it's pretty cool. Not great, but as the second entry in the first Star Wars FPS series, and probably the first 3D Star Wars game to let you wield a lightsaber, it's a fun pulpy ride that I feel is enjoyable by anyone who likes older FPS titles and doesn't mind a little bit of archaic design.

Mysteries of the Sith is not this.

Mysteries of the Sith is some bullshit.

MOTS is very clearly made for people who are completely deranged boomer shooter fans like I am; people like me who have been playing this genre since they were a wee lad or lass (I played FPS games when I was 3!) and know the genre in and out; people like me who can probably play multiple DOOM maps blindfolded, finds anything below Hard or Very Hard to be annoying and tedious in most FPS games, has twitch reflexes, and somehow enjoys maniacal puzzle solving and level design that has no human logic or reason behind it.

And I think I love it.

It's about as indulgent in 90s FPS design tropes as you can get. Levels are often sprawling but there doesn't seem to be any real world rhyme or reason to parts of their design; it's often weird and winding explicitly for the purpose of testing the players ability to apply made up powers for problem solving.

Dark Forces 1 was clearly meant to be a game with 'real' locations. Many levels make a pretty remarkable amount of sense, only confusing because cities and industrial landscapes can be confusing to outsiders, and any level obfuscation can be blamed on sci-fi bullshit.

Dark Forces 2 steered away from this, but it still made SOME sense; locations generally felt like they could be real, even if individual areas were kinda nonsensical for the sake of having goofy FPS platforming and shoehorned in traps. None of it ever takes advantage of the fact that you are A Jedi though; you're not gonna be Force Jumping or Speeding or Pulling around for anything other than a few secrets and mucking about with the enemies.

MOTS does not give two shits about this and has levels that feel vaguely real enough to make sense but are generally a bunch of wacky things chained together because it's entertaining. Said wacky things often expect that you're completely willing to use every bit of kit at your arsenal; it wants you to be zooming around at nauseating paces, hopping around like a jackrabbit, throwing switches with the Force, and persuading ancient statues in a forgotten forest.

Also, the game has some absolute fucking bullshit everywhere. Like, completely impossible to know ahead of time traps, secrets that requires absurd intuition to locate, enemies that can kill you in seconds... it ALMOST gets out of hand at points. But I feel like I was smiling along with the developers, thinking, "oh man that was wild, now why'd you put THAT there you silly gooses? Hehe~"

I think it's a pretty cool study in designing a game for people who are as In The Know as the hypothetical you, The Designer, are. I don't think anyone designing MOTS was a newbie to FPS game design; these were people who loved the genre and had probably had tons of experience working on it, assuming they weren't all rehires from the base DF2 team. I haven't checked, sorry.

But the game was absolutely not meant to be played by people who don't have the same level of brain worms that I do; so much of the level design I feel would be utterly alien to people used to Real Game Environments the same way I struggle to navigate games with Real Game Environments like The Last of Us.

I think it's also super cool how all of this does work into the game. Like I said, it expects you to be doing goofy force bullshit in the way DF2 didn't and DF1 most certainly did not because the latter doesn't even have Jedi and Sith shit going on. It's also rather different from DF3/4 (Jedi Outcast/Academy) because the game design feels much more *retro* than those two. It really does make you feel like a wild mystical super power user just by virtue of using those powers to solve things.

MOTS is a very goofy, self-indulgent game besides this anyways. The whole story references characters that NO ONE except massive extended universe lore nerds would care about, the protagonist is the apprentice of the protag from the first game, who you then FIGHT IN AN EPIC SUPER COOL DUEL AT THE END to save him from turning to the EVIL DARK SIDE.

This game was made for the small handful of people who love boomer shooters in all of their bullshit, and additionally, people who are like that AND love crazy fanfiction shit. That's me, I'm both of those; I don't really care deeply about Star Wars but I do love me some self-indulgent fanfiction.

This is a big rambly post, but the point is, MOTS is pretty awesome and I recommend it to people deep in the boomer shooter mines. It's a far better paced game than the kind of sloggish DF2, it's a more enjoyable FPS experience than the lightsaber-focused DF3 and 4, and it's a self-indulgent good time in every other way.

[alleksistrash]

The Stone On The Wall

Chapter 7 of (?)

Previous Chapter:

When Bilbo woke up the next day, it was to the sound of hushed giggles. He didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but he kept his eyes closed to try and listen to who it was. A loud laugh broke out, before they were hushed to keep their voice down. Bilbo couldn’t be certain, but he thought it was Kili laughing. This made his chest feel lighter, hoping that the other voice would be Fili or Thorin. He wasn’t necessarily disappointed when he recognized the other voice as the elf lass that helped Kili, but he had been wishing it would be Thorin. He opened his eyes to look over, watching the pair. Kili was still lying on his back, a bandage wrapped around his torso. The red-headed elf was sitting next to his cot, holding his hand while they had a whispered conversation. Bilbo let them have their moment before clearing his throat, alerting them that he was awake.

“Mister Boggins! Tauriel was just telling me how you woke up yesterday, I’m so glad to see it for myself!” From how Bilbo was propped up, he could see the bright grin on Kili’s face as well as the blush creeping up his neck. The elf, who he assumed was Tauriel, bowed her head at him in greeting. “Hello Mister Baggins, I have heard many great things about you.” Bilbo looked down at where their hands were still joined before making eye contact with Tauriel again, smiling at her.

Bilbo laughed as he shook his head, “Whatever nonsensical fantasies Kili has told you, please ignore them. I’m just a simple hobbit lacking in common sense.” Bilbo kept a small smile as he thought about the journey to Erebor, from the trolls trying to eat everyone to staying at Beorn’s. He winced as he remembered the goblin caves and trying to rescue the dwarves from the Mirkwood dungeons. This reminded him of the ring, which he scrambled to look for in his trouser pockets. He relaxed once he felt the cold weight of the ring in his pocket, turning it over between his fingers before letting it go. 

Kili squawked in protest at Bilbo, spluttering out a response. “You defended Uncle Thorin from Azog all by yourself! Then you somehow broke us out of the dungeons, sorry Tauriel,” he glanced at her with his apology, which she laughed at, “and then you found the keyhole to get us into the mountain! Not to mention you even stole the Arkenstone from Smaug, you’re braver than a dwarf Bilbo!” Bilbo blushed darker at every statement, his ears burning. He was never one to like flattery, especially when he felt as though it was undeserved. However, before he could speak up a fourth voice joined them in the tent.

“You’re being too loud, Kee, you’re givin’ me a headache.”  Everyone turned to face Fili, who had managed to push himself up onto his elbows to look at his brother. He had a bandage wrapped around his head, causing his hair to bunch up over it. The sour look on his face fell when he looked at Kili, before seeing who was next to him. He smiled at the duo, but it didn’t quite reach his eyes. Bilbo sighed, knowing it would be awhile for Fili to warm up to Tauriel, and even longer before Thorin would even think of looking at her.

Thinking of Thorin, Bilbo turned his head to face the dwarf, actually taking in how he looked. He didn’t give himself time yesterday to process what Thorin looked like, or what the extent of his injuries would be. He remembered Gandalf telling him how Thorin had been stabbed through the abdomen, and Dwalin had all but carried him back to the medical tent before he collapsed. He shook the image out of his head, forcing the tears welling up in his eyes to go away. He had to focus on the now, and how Thorin was still here, breathing and alive. He watched how the bandage wrapped around his chest rose and fell with his breath, the most peaceful look on his face that Bilbo had ever seen.

Fili coughed, getting Bilbo’s attention. He hadn’t noticed when Tauriel left, but he assumed it was to get someone to check on Fili. “You know.. Uncle was really worried about you Bilbo. We almost had to drag him away from your side when we got here, but Balin knocked some sense into him when he reminded him how angry you’d be if he stopped taking care of himself. He really cares about you. I mean, we all do, but.. It’s different for him, I think.” Fili rubbed the back of his neck, wincing in pain when he moved his head too fast. Bilbo felt his cheeks heat up, unable to believe what he heard. Thorin cared about him? How could that be true, when he barely even called him Bilbo? It was always master burglar, with the occasional Master Baggins.

Bilbo didn’t dwell on it for long, as the tent flap opened and Balin, Oin, and the elf who had taken care of him yesterday entered the tent. Balin seemed overjoyed to see both of the princes awake and alert, while Oin and the elf seemed disgruntled that they were already pushing their luck with their injuries. “Back down to bed with the both of ya! Can’t have ya rippin’ out yer stitches before they’re even close to being healed!” Oin limped his way over to stand between their cots, almost shoving Fili back down. Fili grunted in response, while Kili laughed at his older brother. He stopped when pain shot through his chest, causing him to hiss through his teeth. Oin scoffed at Kili, glaring daggers into him, royalty be damned. Bilbo laughed in earnest, relishing in the familiarity. He was glad to know that despite everything they had been through the past fourteen months, the company still acted like a close group of friends and family.

Next Chapter:

[privatelivebait]

Warhammer Fest 2023 Part 1

Attention Troops! Please enjoy this series of photgraphs from Warhammer Fest 2023 day 1. I tried to grab what I could but was rather busy. Overall the convention was a lot of fun. Was a little disappointed with the lack of talks/Q&A’s/panels/authors etc. but the folks who WERE there were a delight! Great seeing all the Golden Daemon entries, the other cosplayers (shoutout to the lads and lasses from Funhammer Cosplay, champions all), the full-scale Titanicus game, the game previews (Boltgun being my favourite of the bunch, I do believe I’m on their social media playing it.) and most of all talking to all the Imperial Citizens brave enough to approach and converse (many Krieg sympathisers out there, which was nice.)!! Alas I was not able/willing to stand in the 4 hour queue for the 10th edition preview games, but everyone I saw playing was having a good time for what that is worth. My collection of photos from day 1 are below the cut, please enjoy at your leisure and ask any questions!

[windynebula]

One more thing that I great about the Voyager experience is seeing them in Eurovision and interviews being all goofy (the Water Splashing Saga and that bit before their performance where Alex pretended to sing to the wrong end of the mic come to mind) and the whole Submarine music video, so you're like "what a bunch of Lads (and Lass) :)". Then you go watch their Old Old music videos and they're like

They were a serious band once but they just decided to Get Goofy With It.

[undertsums]

A bunch of Gyftmas times

Roman was so excited! She was finally able to convince all of her alternate versions and alternate Shadows to spend Gyftmas together.

Roman had all the gifts, her void was decorated, nothing can go wrong!

The first to arrive was FarmRoman(Crop) and FarmShadow(Cluck), Roman came up with the nicknames everyone needed. The two prepared food for Gyftmas, Roman always knew she was a good cook! As they set the table with the food another lot arrived that being SwapShadow(Swapy) and SwapRoman(Grey).

"SWAPY!" Roman yelled as she hugged Swapy tightly, he giggled as he hugged Roman back "Roman, thanks for the invite" he replied, Grey smiled as she watched the two talk. Guess she was to greet visitors now.

She looked over when she heard the sound of a portal and instantly got annoyed. It was FellRoman(Boss lady) and FellShadow(Mutt). "Hello" Grey greeted, Boss lady groaned "I'm only here for the food, I could care less about this...Gyftmas crap" she said. Grey smirked "good, was worried I was dealing with a different Roman for a moment" she teased. Boss lady growled "I'm also here because I heard we are going to have a fight" she replied.

Grey blinked confused "that wasn't in our invite" she said, before Boss lady could reply the portal opened and out zoomed a blaster.

"Ah Horror careful" a small girl said, she had dirty pink hair and torn clothes "oh, uh...HorrorJoyce?" Grey asked. HorrorJoyce looked toward Grey and nodded "y-yes" she replied. "Ah so-" "A blaster would be a great first fight" Boss lady said interrupting Grey, Boss lady ran for HorrorBlasterRoman(Horror).

"Ah, f-fight? Wait um please!" HorrorJoyce said running after Boss lady. Mutt and Grey stared at each other "I'm gonna get some food" Mutt said as he floated off.

Grey let out a sigh and then another portal opened and out walked a very tall skeleton "holy damn" Grey yelped out. PirateRoman(Captain) lifted up her hands "ah...S-Sorry matey, didn' mean to scare ye" she said. Grey let out a sigh "I-I need a break...Can you greet others when they come?" She asked, Captain smiled "aye lass, they'll get a pirate's greeting!" She replied.

Grey walked off needing a break from too much stimulation, a portal opened and Captain spun around "welcome matey!" She greeted. OuterRoman(Star) and OuterShadow(Galaxy) stared up at Captain "woah, I've never seen anyone as tall as you before" Star said, hopping excitedly but frowned when she realised gravity existed here.

"Aww...I can't float" She said, Galaxy smiled and lifted her up "better?" He asked, Star giggled then gasped "SWAPY, ROMAN!" She yelled, Galaxy floated toward where Star wanted to go.

Captain smiled and waited, the portal opened again, not just one however, it was three. InkRoman(Artist) came out of one portal, ErrorRoman(Glitchy) from the next and ErrorShadow(Crash) from the last "hey matey's!" Captain greeted.

Artist smiled widely at Captain "hi there, let's move away from here incase these two start a fight" she said dragging Captain away. Glitchy and Crash glare at each other "W-Wh-h-hat are yo-o-ou doing here?" Glitchy asked harshly, Crash huffed "j-juss-st want to-o-o enjoy the par-r-rty" he replied.

The two didn't notice that a portal opened behind them before a voice spoke up "oh my, are you two connecting?" Glitchy and Crash spun around spotting PerfectKidRoman(Perfection) there.

Glitchy and Crash both quickly backed away from her despite her small size "oh? I'm sorry for interrupting" Perfection said with a smile. Glitchy gagged "I'm gett-tt-ing away from this f-freak" she said walking away, Crash followed.

Roman only just returned and her eyes widened seeing Perfection "I didn't invite you" she said, Perfection giggled "oh I know, but this IS a Roman and Shadow party...Right?" She asked. Roman nodded, Perfection giggled again "listen, how about I promise not to steal any traits unless someone willingly plays my game" she offered, holding out her hand.

Roman stared hard "not shaking your hand but okay...Oh no that means-" She said before a very colourful portal opened up and out came FreshRoman(Fresh). Roman ran away quickly, Perfection stared at Fresh "not cool brah...No one greeting me" she muttered, Perfection smirked and held out her hand to Fresh "I'll greet you friend" she said. Fresh shook Perfection's hand, the two walking away, Perfection couldn't WAIT to take this one's trait, Fresh couldn't wait to see how this one reacts to their real selves.

Another portal opens and AngelRoman(Perseverance) came flying out with her brother ReaperShadow(Erebus) following behind "finally a break from our responsibilities" Perseverance said, another portal opened up as DreamRoman(Hope) and NightmareShadow(Guilt) came out "oh hey, you here for the break from responsibilities too?" Guild asks, Perseverance nodded "yes we are!" She replied with a laugh as the four walked off to go mingle.

This was a Gyftmas no one would forget.

[beck-a-leck]

I bit the bullet and posted the hyperfixation fic.

An Ill-Advised Journey - By TheBeckster; T, WIP, 1/?, 4.7k

When Bilbo Baggins left the Shire in the company of Thorin Oakenshield, she had not known she was pregnant. The thought of it being a possibility hadn’t even crossed her mind. She should turn around and return to the Shire. She should go home to safety and give up on this dangerous adventure. She should do a great many things. None of which are traipsing across all of Middle-earth with a pack of Dwarves. And yet...

If you've been here, then you know I have spent the last 2 months working on this story and honestly I'm just getting the Hyperfixation Fic out before I lose my nerve. (And really, I've only waited this long because I could not settle on a title, and darn it I'm still entirely happy with the one I picked)

Not entirely sure where it came from other than I've been doing a Tolkien deep dive recently, going through the books and rewatching the movies, which I hadn't done in a while, so the Hobbit was semi-fresh on my mind, granted it had still been like 4 months since I'd done the book and movies. And I guess I'm a creature of habit, and when things happen irl I guess I turn them into fics? Ya know, I love baby-fic, and I'm of an age where people in my life are having babies, and I guess when someone I know has a baby I end up writing baby-fic, because everyone deserves some soft baby cuddles. And then when I start new jobs, I guess I also write Rule 63 AUs, which also happened to me this summer. So the math works out, I suppose. Tolkien Deep Dive + Baby Fic Need + New Job Rule 63 AU = the most ill-advised road trip ever. (aka a fic for a fandom I've never been really into and never thought I would write, but current me is laughing at me from 3 months ago now) Okay look! Maybe I just wrote this story because I wanted to see the Company being all soft for a tiny baby! Sue me!

Snippet below the cut!

“Pregnant?” she echoed in disbelief. “At my age? Don’t be ridiculous. My courses are supposed to be ending. No, no that can’t be right. Besides, I haven’t –” the memory of that gentleman Hobbit from Bree sparked in Bilbo’s mind. “—Oh… oh I suppose I have. Oh dear. Oh my…”

Then she fell into a bit of a state, muttering to herself and thinking so deeply that she appeared to neither hear nor feel any attempts to get her attention.

“She gets like this,” Óin assured the Elves, “Give her a moment, she’ll either snap out of it, faint, or start whistling like a kettle.”

Bilbo did not start whistling like a kettle, nor did she utter one single “nope” before passing out. She did eventually reach the bottom of her mental spiral and reemerged to see three healers blinking patiently at her.

She laughed hesitantly. “I don’t suppose what you just told me a few minutes ago was all a hallucination?”

“That depends on what you believe we told you.” One of the Elves offered gently.

“That I’m pregnant?”

They all pursed their lips and shook their heads. “That’s real, lass.” Óin confirmed.

Bilbo dropped her head into her hands. “Oh, of all the times to leave the Shire unexpectedly. They’ll never believe that I… oh, dear. Oh, bother.” She looked up at Óin. “Did you know?”

“I suspected. Thought you were using us as an excuse to escape a scandal.”

Laughing just on the edge of hysterics, Bilbo shook her head. “Gracious no! If I’d known, I’d never have agreed to traipsing all across Middle-Earth with a bunch of Dwarves. That would have been right foolish, wouldn’t it?” Her eyes suddenly went wide. “Oh dear, I’ll have to tell the others, won’t I?”