#he was saying shit like how ‘id make a good date’ and ‘he feels young in his brain and always gets confused how his body doesn’t reflect

[sunlightfeeling]

Christmas Dinner Checklist:

Petted the dog ✅

Made some jokes ✅

Made some conversation ✅

Ate ✅

Drank about a bottle of wine ✅

Smoked up with the host ✅

Uh… ✅

Yeah ✅

[spaloonbabooguuscooties]

You could drink your whole life away and still never get that taste out of your mouth.

half commission for @salempie half completely self indulgent dreck pieced together from our insane conversations abt franke and elka. told myself id finally write a big explanation for all of the dum shit between these two for context so Thats Under The Cut.

so I already wrote some stuff about elka and franke's relationship back in whispering rock so feel free to look at that too . it goes over elkas blindness/‘seeing’ with clairvoyance and how her and franke started talking & all that good stuff

SO FOR STARTERS. a lot of thsi wont make sense without a big breakdown of elka herself. because elkas potential as a character is like insane to me. like just the idea of her in the long run of her life reads as something so potentially tragic; a young girl whos plagued with visions of doom and destined to be an outcast even in her own home for things she cant control and clings to the One vision of her wedding that she thinks is 'happy' even despite the fact she doesnt really love the person in it. im choosing to take the li-po doc as canon here because its funny shes the only one with backstory-

but my fucking god even the smallest look into what her parents are like is soo fucked up to me. and i do think elka especially gets a lot of influence from her mother; its funny how easily you can fit mabel doom into a box just from what elka says about her. knees deep in an avon-esque pyramid scheme and leaning into her daughters depressing ass visions & taking her to therapy at age 11 (which would be good if not for the kind of person you can already assume she is & so i doubt the therapist she has really does her any good. i think they share one). she reads as a very I Am My Daughters Best Friend type of mom to me and i can see elka being a centerpiece of the conversation when she has her Amway Girls over for drinks. wine-mom that lets her kid sip from the glass so she can feel like a big girl type deal.

and you can tell that elka is trying to hard to be too mature for her age even in her campster posts. how she writes letters to nils' mom and exchanges baking recipes with her and that feels like she really only interacts with middle aged women and not really many people her own age outside of camp (like her moms friends). which makes sense shed feel the need to ‘grow up’ early when shes probably had to process so many hard things at a young age bc of her visions.

theres a lot of filling the blanks here of course.

elka obsesses over nils to an overbearing degree even despite the fact he treats her like shit ('you promised no talking' and so on) and she treats him bad right back. she leans onto stereotypical heterosexual ideals like taking care of him and overblowing how Manly and Protective JT is and she admires romance stories like pride and prejudice and it feels like she Projects Soooooooo much of what she wants onto boys she barely feels anything for without knowing what its actually supposed to feel like. and clearly she WANTS that ideal future, a happy marriage, an actual romance- but according to nils even when they were dating she ignored him most of the time, which just seems Very Telling

like shes filling a role, overcompensating for emotions and lacktherof she cant digest quite yet, and it only makes more sense when you know shes had visions of their future together. how could that be bad for her? shouldnt it be like the books and movies? but she doesnt really connect the fact that her visions are only for Doomed futures, and if she does she certainly doesnt show it. Doomed relationships. it's been a part of her family for generations and she isn't turning out much different, is she? i dont think she even realizes thats all she ever sees yet, just that its Going to happen. that it's Her future, and it always will be

and like, her only reference for a real marriage so far has been her own parents, and she already Knows they have an affair, and theyre doomed to split, (and i actually like to think they were in rough waters anyway and elka was a child meant to mend a crumbling marriage but thats a whole other thing) and so without a framework for what an actual healthy relationship is supposed to be like she cant really grasp that her relationship with nils Isnt that and isnt ever going to be. she can only cling to this one happy idea of the future, and thats why she keeps chasing him, self fulfilling the actuality of her situation and creating and fostering the unhappy life they will inevitably live together.

and that bleeds into everything else in her life, of course, because as the years go on, as the visions grow in number it just makes sense for her to fall into the predictability of her life. she always knows whats going to happen, her visions are Never wrong- so why try to change things? shes had time to process tragedies days, weeks, months, years before they happen, shes had time to settle into every crack of her life. her parents divorce, her various break ups, her future with the psychonauts.

“and she's already seen so much of a future with [nils] she feels trapped almost. Like she has to be happy in it or else it just means her life is miserable. And it's a mixture of pride and fear of the unknown that keeps her clinging to the One thing she knows. BUT LIKE!!! She knows what's gonna happen! It's easier to grieve when she's been grieving for years... She wants so badly to be happy, But to do that she has to step into the unfamiliar. And that's more terrifying than staying the same miserable person she's always been.”

and thats where franke comes in— and yeah you Do have to take a lot of liberties for frankes character since it’s basically, like, all the info for her is just that shes a Supreme Baby Dyke but thats enough for me. i think she has protective butch itch in her . on campster shes defensive over other women evidenced in the way she keeps watch over the girls cabins for lili when elton is pursuing her . but shes also eager to please and constantly trying to make kitty laugh and also Very naive. but she tries! and i think it only solidifies more as she gets Older and really gets a hold of her feelings & her powers. this is incredibly franke to me

and i think as they grow older together— because i think franke and elka Do stay friends, both because elka is just pathetic and needs that positive connection even if she doesnt realize it and because i think franke is a very Loyal person & annoyingly persistent if you let her be . and i am also a kitty/franke truther. because kittys also important in this web we weave

because i think franke and kitty stay together after camp, to a point— theres a falling out facilitated on kittys end and they break up, but reconnect, and franke kind of... saves kitty from herself a little, from her strict military father whos love only extends thru finances , from her own stifling future , she drives all the way to bakersville in her shitty van handmedowned from her dad and they move in together eventually . they get jobs at the motherlobe , because it’s a pipeline to a decent job, because it’s whats easy, because franke doesn’t really have a future, because she’s never really been good at much, because shes never had much sense, because franke doesnt really care as long as she can live and help, sometimes, if she can, and because kitty’s there, and because elka’s there, and shes so used to being elkas eyes now and shes good at it. shes good at being the muscle of the missions when her colleagues lack it, when hypnosis and predictions arent enough. she likes it that way.

and elka appreciates frankes company. she listens, shes sweet, she does little things for her that no ones ever really put the effort for before; she likes her. franke is strong and bold and makes her laugh and shes always there but god elka cant let go of that future, of that box shes put herself in, that her mothers put her in, of being a Good Wife to a Loving Husband, of getting married normally and falling into unfailing familiarity. thats all shes ever wanted and shes not going to jeopardize that . not for franke, who may not be a boy but is handsome like one, whos always held her after every break up with nils and the men that filled empty days inbetween.

and elka is too stubborn to recognize those feelings anyway. too prideful to accept a way out. too set in her cycle no matter how much she hates it, her little self fulfilling tragedy of her own making, wallowing in her own doom. she struggles for control of her own life when she feels like every choice has been made for her anyway, she puts up her walls and carefully constructs what people see. but franke was always harder to trick, because while empathy isnt a particularly useful psychic power it’s certainly an inconvenient one. all franke has to do is get too close and all those carefully crafted walls fall apart, and elkas control is gone, and thats all she really has. and she tries to distance herself, really she does, but franke is also too persistent. and elka wears gloves, keeps contact that would make her walls crumble from happening as best as she can, but she cant really keep herself from the brief moments where she feels like someone actually fucking cares about her.

and that slightest lack of control, the need to wrestle it back is why she proposes to nils the next time theres a falling out— she knows how it happens, she plans every detail. and he accepts, despite everything. gets her a cheap ring and it feels like lead on her finger and its nothing at all like how shed thought it to be when she was a kid, theres no feather light feeling in her chest, only that dreadful reality that she cant turn this back. BUT WHAT CAN U DO LMAO

elka doesnt tell franke about this engagement until later, on their way back from a mission. late at night when neither of them can sleep, and franke invites elka to smoke in her van, because its been so long since theyve been alone like that, because elkas been so strangely absent lately. and because of everything, because frankes always so damn nice, because elka hates the feel of the ring on her finger, because she let herself get high alone with franke fucking athens whos always been so good at pulling her apart— the truth of it all spills out and its messy and emotional and she hates it, she hates the life shes made for herself, but franke makes it easier to bare and now shes here and shes so close and god she wishes she could see her smile again, she wishes she could see franke, thats all she needs right now and she cant but she can touch her and she can hold her and for tonight, she can be known, she can let those walls crumble, she can be something else just for once here with franke . she can kiss her here in this van, touch that happiness for just a moment, and forget the future that waits for her outside of it. franke begs her to forget the wedding, to just let herself be happy— and god, she wants to, but it means turning her back on everything shes known and everything shes saw to be inevitable, and franke has never been in her future, so if it were supposed to work out why hadnt she seen it and she cant, she cant take that risk but she can have this, even if its temporary, she can have it.

and just as soon as she gets a taste of it, its gone. after that night, after the missions over and theyre back at the motherlobe and have to pretend like nothing happened (franke doesnt, of course she tells kitty about it, she tells kitty about everything.) but that brief moment together haunts elka every time she sees franke, sees herself through frankes eyes, sees herself in her wedding dress because god its all franke can think about! of course it is! she knows how much elkas destroying herself she knows how much misery shes wallowing in that kiss in the van felt like an emotional punch to the teeth and she hasnt ever forgotten it and all she can do is sit and watch while elka throws herself into a loveless marriage. she can come to her wedding and see the way the bride and groom kiss with the emotional weight of a wet towel no matter how hard elka tries to hide it under a pretty dress and bouquets of flowers and meticulous planning.

and elka resents nils but she cant really hate him, its not his fault, not really. he feels trapped just like she does and his feelings of misery only cycle back into hers . they fight and gnash and wear away at each other and its a relationship thats crashed and burned a million times before elka even said i do. and its inevitable that she falls into her mothers habits, a sip of wine here and there to loosen up, until it turns to a glass, until it falls into a bottle on nights when whatever work nils does runs late.

but franke’s still there. shes always been there, hasn’t she? always trying to play knight, always trying to save her, dragging her home when shes stumbling over herself because god who else is going to do it but her? who else is left to care? certainly not nils. never nils. because franke knows her. because franke pities her. shes always pitied her. shes always known. and elka hates it, she resents it, but god in the same breath she’s desperate for it, she envies it to her very bones. elka is a mess but after frankes done with her she has someone to go back to that loves her. and god what elka wouldnt do to have that. to take it and keep it for herself because shes never ever got to have that movie romance shes always wanted.

so now comes this.

because elkas particularly miserable and particularly spiteful and she needs to get franke to understand, just for a moment, drink with her and get on her level and she needs her there with her no matter how her pity makes her feel. no matter how much it makes her shake with anger and envy and desperation, but god the way franke looks at her, the way she still tries to salvage what they have, the soft, slurred way she tells her that it’s okay but its not okay, none of this is okay, it never has been and she just wants franke to shut up and see that, and if she cant then she’ll show her, she’ll show her all the raw angry desperation, with too much teeth and hands that claw and grab and she’ll know why everyones always said she’s too much.

and she knows this puts her on nils’ level too. that this makes her a cheater, that shes no better than he is now. no better than her father and his affair. but god, she wants to be selfish. she wants to be in control. just for once. she wants to feel right and she wants to feel happy and she wants to feel loved. thats all shes ever wanted. and franke will let her have that, just for a little while, at the very least.

anyway. sorry. sorry for being crazy . this isnt even getting into the shit after the comic takes place . elkas stupid brainworld thag she has to overcome in order to finally be allowed in the polycule and live happily ever as worlds first lesbian divorceman

sorry for all the shit i make up instead of caring about actual characters with screentime . bye !

[kuni-is-daddy]

Going on a date.

Boss scara X bodyguard female reader

Fluff(Smut if you count kuni being touchy and horni)

Thank you for 130 followers! :)

Scara fic list. Part 1 of boss scara

1.21k words.

"But besides that ill keep this letter short for you Kuzushi', Ive heard word from Miko while i resided in tenshukaku about the wonderful things you've been doing for the Gakaden company, I truly am proud of you, and I hope you can continue to bring glory to our bloodline. Your aunt Makoto would be proud of you as well-"

The letter continued but Kuni couldn't be bothered to read the rest. Closing the lavender smelling letter within its envelope and resting his head against the window of the car. Could it be his coldness? He thought. Something about the letter just felt too good to be true. His mother never was that kind nor even asked about his personal life so why now? It felt as if his heart began to sink in his chest. But that feeling resided once he was tuned out his emotional daze by your smooth voice. "My lord- I mean kuni, we've arrived at Komore teahouse." You turned your head to look at him in the rearview mirror as he sighed and adjusted his tie. "Alright..Just pull over here."

Your routine remained the same. Always getting out of the car before your lord and doing a perimeter check of your surroundings. Dates are rare with scara even though you two practically spend every second together, its morally because he has to maintain the shoguns army from the shadows along with the gakaden company. Yet his creator is 'so busy dealing with inazuma.' So you wore a Kimono in honor of your Lords culture since this was so rare. And god did he love it. Scara would undress you with his eyes when he'd watch you walk around and open the door for him to get out the car. Looking you up and down while opening it. "Shit you look good..Say..How about we skip this and go back to the penthouse?" He said while whispering into your ear and trailing his hands along your waist. "N-No Kuni- you spent alot of money on our date! you're just going to have to wait master." And there he goes getting riled up, He loved when you talked back, either to punish you for it or just get turned on even more. "Oh yeah? What if master doesnt want to wait? Your gonna help me out like a good girl?" From that point your just flat out BLUSHING. You want to walk away out of embarrassment but try to stay formal as possible because of your job being his bodyguard. Meanwhile kuni is enjoying every second of teasing you. Even daydreaming about taking off ever piece of clothing your wearing and making you scream out his name. From the way your delicate hips swayed with the bow as you opened the door to the teahouse, To the badass way you'd sheath your signature weapon when you sensed danger just for him.

He walked towards you already fangirling over the luxurious spot he chose out himself for you to dine at with a beautiful balcony view of Inazuma's sunset. "This is AMAZING KUNI! We can walk out and feel the nice breeze and OOO. WE CAN TAKE SELFIES TOGETHER!!" You paced around the room like a child in a candy store while kuni gave a light smile at your childish reaction as he settled the payments again for your day out. "Ahem. Excuse me, Lord Scaramouche?" kuni reluctantly shifted his attention towards the servant. "Yeah? What do you want?" "I- sorry, I was just asking. Is this on official business with My Lord Kamisato? If so ill inform him right away and-" kuni cut him off and looked at the young servant with a purple glow in his eyes. "Hah. You think id waste this much time and mora on that Yashiro rascal? The audacity to even ask me that." the servant began to stutter "My apologies lord scaramouche ill-" "Go make yourself useful and fetch some tea for me. Get out of my sight."

Kuni took off his jacket and sat across you. Resting against the back of the chair with his hands in his pocket and observing how you looked out towards the sunset. "Dont think anyone's gonna try to attack me through 'the sun' Y/n." You looked at him and sighed. "Kuni...He's just doing his job, Why do you have to pick fights with everyone when we go out." "Hah. Picking fights? You make it sound like im a child, pet. I wasn't the one just fawning over a fancy room now was i? Even though you we're kinda cute doing it." he smirked as you blushed at his words. Resting your hands on your thighs over the suggestive nickname he had for you.

Throughout the date it would mostly be you initiating the conversations, Kuni didnt mind silence since he wasnt a really 'talkative person' ever since his mom left but with you it was so much different. Even though it looked like he didnt care, He was interested in anything you talked about even if it was something as mundane like your daily schedule or stories about your past experiences in natlan. Sometimes he'd even say things that would contradict what you'd say or believe in just to get a reaction out of you that would warm his cold little heart.

After finishing your meal, the both of you sat at the balcony watching the moon rise into the sky. "This is the part where you usually say 'finaLly aNOther boRing day drawing to a close." You'd mumble to him and laugh. But he'd have a completely different reaction. Raising his eyebrows then turning to look at the stars again. "Actually. I wish this day wasnt over yet. Wouldnt mind staying here with you if it meant it wouldn't." You give a shocked reaction at his shift in tone. Looking down to see his smooth fingers intertwined with yours. When you looked back up towards him, Kuni smashed his lips against yours. Trailing his hands under your kimono while hearing you moan out his name as you tried to catch your breath. "Hah..Kuni-mm Love you~" he parted the kiss, shifting his attention towards you neck as you leaned back in on the bench. "Say that louder for me baby." He said while biting and sucking on your neck. "Kuni~ I love you~ Mmm id do anything for you~" You tugged on his tie, Drawing his perked body closer to yours. "There's my good girl." He pulled away, leaving a hickey on your neck then Cupping your face in the palm of his hand to see your already wrecked expression while the dim light of the moon rested against the both of you.

As the night went on you sank into his embrace. Letting the steady beat in his chest and the smell of his cologne put you in a deep feeling of comfort. "Hey..Y/n.. i Love you. I know im..Not a saint but.. Im hard on everyone including myself, that's just how I am and I wouldnt ever hurt you-" Kuni then looked down to see you fast asleep on his shoulder. Ugh didnt the same thing happened before when you two visited the abyss? The pained feeling in his chest in his chest began to happen again making him give a confused look. He wasnt reading his moms letter nor did he think about her in the moment. He use to despise these emotions, Deeming them as a sign of weakness and the reason why his mom abandoned him..but at the same time she gifted him with a dynasty, The gakaden company. Along with meeting you. These feelings of his was like a double-edged sword. But he didnt care anymore or want to question it. He just wanted you, and this wonderful night to never end.

[matoitech]

don't recall if you ever elaborated but how long do blue's relationships usually last

ooo good question i dont think i have! id say typically as an average (so there were many that were shorter) prooobably a few months for actual committed relationships, anything casual can range longer bcuz there isn’t as many expectations for him lol. he’s not very good at committing or being there for people emotionally (or physically, hes gone a lot w his job) he’s not rly empathetic and he can get rly stuck in his head and self obsessed. he leans more towards casual relationships bcuz hes self aware enough to realize his behavior and wants in general w relationships r not conducive for healthy committed relationships but hes fighting thru a lot of conflicting instincts in them and it tends to bring up a lot of shit w his background or his own problems he doesnt want to deal with (and it inevitably blows up in his face)

his longest 'it went for at least a couple years without a breakup' relationship was with his bands original bassist but they were really young when they dated like, late teens, very early twenties, somewhere around there. she was his first relationship and a lot of shit happened though and he broke up w her and it kinda turned him off from serious relationships. im keeping it vague not only for spoilers but bcuz i know what kind of route i want to take with it but im not sure how implied vs very obvious i want to go with it yet

his longest relationship Now as an adult solidly in his 20s is probably his and elle’s on-again off-again thing, i dunno the exact timeline for the longest they’ve been together before they broke up again but id assume probably smth like six months to a year (a year feels like its stretching it but ill be generous), though they’ve had their Thing going on for a few years at least at this point though. on again off again yknow. theyve had months to maybe even a year in between seeing each other sometimes. but that’s not the norm for him bcuz when they get back together he does actually want to try to some extent, however long that feeling of wanting to make more of an effort lasts before they both get frustrated again lol

anyway hes like capable of longer lasting relationships just him or the other person/people didnt want it to/werent rly ready for it to get serious, or he makes bad decisions and he also makes bad decisions in who he chooses to date sometimes where they just dont Work and no amount of forcing it is gonna make it happen. or he loses interest in ppl or the relationship quickly.or he thinks damn i just wanted to have a fwb or something actually but now i got myself into this whole relationship and i dont actually want to date them. he also just isnt a very good communicator so to him smth that wasnt supposed to be serious can feel a lot more serious to whatever person/people he was with and he gets himself into shit for it, or vice versa bcuz other ppl r often not good communicators too, etc etc. so in tldr: USUALLY NOT VERY LONG. LOL

[gingersforeverbox]

can i request some proposal headcanons with jayce and a gn!reader ? hes such a sweetheart already, id love to see how he acts when hes proposing / being proposed to (*˘︶˘*)

Ok, I’m gonna say this right now, This man is a mess in both scenarios no matter what. He could (and would) plan everything down to a T and still fumble his way through like a blubbering mess. Just look at him and tell me he’s not big dumb energy when it comes to his partner. He looks like he would faint with a dopey smile on his face if you were the one to even say ‘I love you’ first. Anyways, thank you so much for this lovely request, and feel free to ask more!  have some headcanons my dear!

Him proposing to you headcanons:

As I previously mentioned, he would want everything planned from the location to the time to the way you both were facing when he asks. He just wants it to be absolutely perfect because you deserve to have a perfect proposal in his eyes. 

He would try to be subtle about everything so you don’t get any ideas. He didn’t want you to think that he was doing anything important that would take his time away from you, so for a good few months out from the date he asks, he takes you to the spa on a regular basis. You just think he’s being kind (and he is because he loves how relaxed you look afterwards) but really he’s building up a pattern so that you get used to doing what you like at the spa so he can get you used to feeling at ease when it’s that time again. Do I think that he came up with this idea on his own? No, not at all. I think he asked either Mel or his mother for advice. 

SPEAKING OF WHICH: his mama LOVES YOU so much! She is so so happy for her handsome young man for getting such a catch and is already making arrangements to welcome you into house Talis as soon as you said y’all were dating, so imagine how excited she is when her son says he’s gonna propose!

The date leading up to the proposal would be surprisingly low key. He would take you to the to-go restaurant where you two had your first one-on-one study session together. He would order you two of your favorites so that you can put one in the fridge and eat it later at your shared apartment, you can’t tell me he wouldn’t.

Next, he would take you to the park to sit under the tree where y’all had your first kiss with a blanket for you both to eat on while he encouraged you to talk about anything and everything you could ever want. He loves it when you talk about things you’re passionate about after all.

As the sun set on the horizon, he would take you back to your apartment and insist that you go to the kitchen and put the leftovers on the counter for him to put away. While that was not normal of him to ask, you didn’t mind because there was obviously something going on that he wasn't talking about. As you went to the kitchen he all but sprinted to the bedroom to light your favorite candles and turn off the lights before opening the doors to the balcony to see the beginnings of stars blinking in the sky. 

He would yell for you to come to the bedroom because of “an emergency”, but he didn’t think that through because you immediately started running to help. Like full-on running. 

Just to see him knelt on the floor surrounded by your favorite flowers, holding a ring he forged by hand for you over the span of a few weeks to get just right. 

It took you a second to register what you were seeing, but as soon as realization hit you like a truck, you knelt on the floor in front of him, interrupting his speech with tears. When I tell you he panicked I mean that shit. 

“Oh god babe, I am so sorry. Is this too forward, I know we talked about marriage before but I didn’t think that you wouldn’t be interested right now I am so so-”

Your sobs turned to giggles as you cradled his face in your hands before explaining that they were tears of joy, not anguish. 

After reassuring him that you are ready for marriage so long as it’s to him, he abandons the speech to just ask the important question: “Will you marry me?”

After agreeing happily, he slides the ring over your finger, then stands to help you up before taking you to the balcony to talk about what the future holds. 

You proposing to him:

A lot of this will be dependent on your own preferences and how you want to woo our favorite handyman. 

I’m picturing you planning for months in advance!

Just imagine finding the perfect band (I imagine it being titanium or something else that is super strong and symbolic) and having it engraved with something sweet that only the two of you know about. A little inside joke, a sweet name, or even just a simple ‘I love you’.

I’ll tell you this much: this man will be FLUSTERED for sure.

You know how the sunsets in arcane are gorgeous to say the least? Just imagine the way it makes his skin glow as you kneel before him presenting the ring and your declaration of love.

Sorry this one is short as fuck my brain is fried but if you want more please let me know!

[goldentournesol]

Not in That Way

*gif not mine, found on Giphy*

(Spencer Reid x fem!Reader)

The one where Spencer’s TA falls in love with him.

Length: 3.3k

A/N: VAGUE SPOILERS FOR S15 AHEAD! AGE GAP (10 years). Read at your own risk everybody, very angsty. NO PART TWO’S WILL BE WRITTEN. enjoy :)

masterlist

It wasn’t hard, really. It wasn’t hard at all to fall in love with Spencer Reid. In fact, it was the easiest thing she’d ever done. It came so easily that it shook her to the core.

Really, what’s not to love? He is a badass FBI agent with a heart of gold, he can literally recite almost any book to her on demand, and it certainly doesn’t hurt that he looks like he’s been sculpted by a coveted artist.

She didn’t know though, she didn’t know how easy it would be to be completely enamored by someone. She didn’t know what kind of life she’d be stepping into when she’d applied to become his Teaching Assistant. She’d heard from her peers that there was a part-time professor who had been looking for a TA. She signed up without a second thought, desperate for any kind of connections that could possibly help her with her PhD in forensic psychology. When she’d learned that he was a certified genius whose other job was to be a real life superhero, she hoped and prayed he’d pick her application.

She was over the moon when she found out that he did indeed pick her out of all the students who had applied. This was an opportunity of a lifetime. She’d seen his university ID photo on the website and thought he was attractive, but seeing him in person was almost magical. The camera definitely could not quite pick up on the subtle gold flecks in his irises or the silky sheen of his hair. And that smile. She was sure she could drown in it forever.

After being chosen and going through a number of interviews, Y/N learned just how meticulous Dr. Reid was in everything he did. She helped him create the syllabus as well as build his lesson plans. Over the semester, she would go over his grading since he had the tendency to give students the answers instead of making helpful comments on the papers to make them think and reflect. She’d also learned about his particular aversion to technology, which meant they had multiple meet-ups when he was in town just so she can walk him through certain systems, like the university’s portal system as well as the email. She also showed him how to pose his answers as questions instead, explaining that sometimes, he shouldn’t answer their incomplete thoughts because it's an undergrad class. Also, with his unpredictable schedule concerning the FBI, she would often step in and teach his class whenever he was away on a case.

They’d become good friends outside of his office and classroom, probably closer than they should have been. He was just too likeable and she was always eager enough to hear what he had to say, thus a bond between them was born and reinforced each time they saw each other. He was so thoughtful, it shocked her. Once he’d heard her mention that she used to love collecting keychains when she was a child, and made sure to get her a new one from each state he’d visit thanks to his trips around the country. Her previous boyfriends were beyond disappointing in comparison to say the least, and they weren’t even dating. He knew her favorite coffee order by heart and often had it ready with a fresh croissant whenever they met at the university’s coffee shop and if they were meeting at his office, he’d take them to go. 

It was little things like that that made her fall in love with him. And she knew, it’s not like she didn’t, she just chose to hide it with every cell of her being. Crushing on your professor is pretty common amongst university students, but being a TA and being desperately in love with your professor was a whole different kind of story. 

She already admired his intelligence in class immensely, however hearing his stories from his time out in the field made her heart grow three times the size of normal. His stories ranged from being about geographical profiling, to action-packed anecdotes, and even funny moments with the team.

Was she constantly impressed by him? Yes.

Was she constantly worried about him? Also yes.

Which is why she’d practically made him adopt the habit of texting or calling her every time he landed in DC. They’d been chasing this unsub, Lynch, for months on end and he’d informed her that they were finally close to getting him. The last time they talked two days ago, he was feeling confident. But then it was just silence. He hadn’t texted her, he hadn’t called her. She didn’t even know if he was back in DC. Her mind took her places she didn’t want to go. He’d gotten so good with keeping her updated that this silence was turning her blood into ice water.

She’d left 11 missed calls so far. But she didn’t give up, she was determined to hear from him. The next morning she tried again, holding her breath and squeezing her eyes shut in a silent prayer.

“Hello?” Someone finally picked up, a woman.

“Hello? Who is this? I’m trying to reach Spencer Reid.” Y/N said into the phone, voice clearly on the edge of tears.

“Oh you must be Y/N Y/L/N. You’re Spencer’s TA. I’m Penelope Garcia, I work with Spencer.” She said into the phone evenly, calmly.

“Yes, I am. Did something happen to Spencer? He hasn’t contacted me in two days. Why do you have his phone?” Y/N worried into the phone. She could hear every heartbeat, loud and clear.

“Spencer is in the hospital. There was an explosion yesterday and he hit his head really hard. We found him passed out in his apartment this morning.” Penelope answered. Y/N’s eyes widened and she felt the tears slip from her eyes quickly. The panic began to set in.

“C-could you please text me the address?” Y/N managed to whisper into the phone through her tears.

“Of course, sweetie. He’s going to be okay. His mother is here, I’m assuming you know about Diana?” She asked tenderly.

“Yes, yes, I know. I’ll be there as soon as I can.” Y/N said, already rushing to put on shoes and looking for her keys.

The drive to the hospital wasn’t long, but Y/N felt like it took ages to get there anyway. Her breathing was uneven and her eyes were already swollen as if she’d been crying for days. There was a bad, bad feeling reverberating around in her chest. She’d somehow floated through the hospital like she was running on autopilot. 

She’d found the room and met eyes with a blonde woman adorning two identical blue puffs in her hair. She would have thought they were adorable if she wasn’t panicking her heart out. She spotted Spencer laying on the hospital bed with oxygen tubes hanging around his ears and inserted into his nose. The sight made her stomach lurch. Something about the way his usually pink lips were drained of their color made her want to sob until tomorrow came. Beside the bed on the other side sat Diana Reid, a tall woman with short blonde hair. She’d seen her in photos before. Diana merely stared at her with a hint of a smile.

She stepped in the hospital room, swallowing down the bile in her throat, “H-Hi, I’m Y/N.” She waved tentatively into the room, almost unable to keep with the tensity of the two women’s gazes. She wiped at her eyes and stood at the foot of Spencer’s bed, “Is he going to be okay?” She asked, staring at the steady rise and fall of Spencer’s chest. That way it was reassuring to watch him. She could hear her heartbeat in her ears as she stood.

“The doctors are hopeful.” Penelope replied, assessing the young woman who just entered. She was much younger than she previously thought she was. Although she had no idea what to expect when it came to Spencer’s academic life, he was always surprising her.

Diana sat still and silent in the hospital chair, a pensive expression draped across her features. Penelope sensed a tension in the room and looked towards Diana, “Hey, Diana, would you like to come with me down to the cafeteria to fetch some jello for Spencer to eat when he wakes up?”

Y/N sent Penelope a sidelong glance filled with gratitude. She tuned out the sounds of Diana telling Penelope the story of the first time Spencer had jello as they exited the small room. She immediately pulled up the chair closest to his bed and grasped his hand tightly. She let out a shaky breath at the contact. Cold, his hand was so, so cold.

“Oh, Spencer, you scared the shit out of me.” She whispered, pressing her lips to the back of his hand quickly, “I could have lost you today...and-and I wouldn’t have known what to do with myself if that would have happened. I know you probably can’t hear me, but I still have to say what I’m going to say. I have to. For myself. So here goes,” she pauses, taking a deep breath, “there’s nothing that scares me more than losing you, and that thought alone terrifies me.” She sniffled, wiping away her tears, “What I feel for you terrifies me, Spencer. I didn’t know I was capable of loving someone so deeply until I met you. And...I don’t know what to do with all this love, I want to hand it all to you, let you see yourself the way I see you, but I can’t do that. I can’t.” She held back an incoming sob, whispering, “I can’t ask that of you.” 

She bowed her head and rested it along his forearm, her silent tears soaking through the hospital sheets. The fear of grieving for him outweighed the fear of rejection. She’d never forgive herself if he died without knowing how big of a space he occupied in her heart. She didn’t know if she was brave enough to tell him to his face while he was awake, but this was a start. Solidifying her feelings was a start. And man, were they solid.

A few minutes later, her phone began to ring because of an endless stream of emails. There was a class today, and she’d have to teach it. She went back and forth from her phone to Spencer’s face and released a deep, heavy sigh from the pit of her chest. She stood from her seat and hovered her hand over his cheek before allowing it to rest timidly on his skin.

“I have to go, but I’ll see you soon.” She paused, chewing on her lip, “I love you.” She said softly, fresh tears making their way back to the brim of her eyes. She pulled away from him and exited the room swiftly. 

Spencer’s bleary eyes opened slightly to just barely catch the sight of her disappearing into the hallway from which she came. Seconds later, Penelope and his mother came marching in, seeing his open eyes.

Penelope set down the cups of jello nearby and Diana made her way to her son quickly. He could barely keep his eyes open for long enough. It was a small achievement but they both held onto it dearly. 

Hours later, he blinked his eyes open again as he heard his mother and Penelope conversing about his favorite type of cloud. Diana leaned over her son’s bed and set a comforting hand on his shoulder. He stared at her fondly.

“Am I alive or is this heaven?” He asked, smiling slightly.

“You are very much alive.” Diana smiled broadly at him.

Garcia had since gone back to the office to assist the team in finally closing the Lynch case. Spencer was just waking up from yet another snooze. 

Diana looked at him closely, sometimes he felt she was the profiler in the room, “She told you didn’t she?”

Spencer rubbed at his eyes slightly, “Who are you talking about?” He yawned.

“The pretty girl who was in here earlier.” Y/N’s name had slipped her mind the second she said it. Spencer stared at his mother incredulously, shocked at just how clear her mind was at the moment. Diana took his silence as an affirmative and nodded at him.

“You should tell her.” She said definitively. For a moment, he doubted if he understood just what she meant, but he understood.

“How did you know?” Spencer asked curiously.

“I told you, a mother always knows. And I saw the way she looked at you. She deserves to know, Spencer.” Diana said.

She deserves to know.

The thought tumbled around in his head for days after he was discharged from the hospital. He was on medical leave for the moment but as soon as he could see straight, he took the train to her apartment. He’d been there a few times, they’d had a few casual dinners there while grading papers together or coming up with future lesson plans. His hands were on the verge of trembling as he knocked on her apartment door. The numbers nailed on the door mocked him as he stood waiting for her to open.

She frowned at the sound, she wasn’t expecting anybody. She pushed her laptop to the side and stood to straighten her pajamas, making her way to the door. She ripped it open as soon as she saw who it was.

“Spencer! Oh thank goodness you’re okay! I’ve been worried sick about you.” She threw her arms around his middle tightly, making him stagger a bit from the impact, but he enveloped her in his arms anyway. The contact was very welcome.

“Hey.” He smiled into the hug, his heart spilling with gratitude over being worthy enough of her attention. They separated from the embrace and she stared at him with a look resembling wonder.

“What are you doing here? I thought you still had a few more days off until you had to get back to work. Come in, come in.” She moved aside to let him in. She also moved a plethora of blankets and textbooks off the couch to make space for him to sit.

“I know, I’m sorry for kind of coming over unannounced. I didn’t mean to intrude or anything.” He eyed her matching set of cartoon character pajamas as he took a seat, making a mental note that it was the most adorable thing he’s ever seen. She blushed under his gaze but shook her head nonetheless.

“Oh come on, you know you’re always welcome here. Can I get you something to drink? Some water or coffee, maybe?” She asked.

“Water’s fine.” He smiled, leaning back into the couch. She nodded and made her way into the kitchen. Spencer’s shoulders untensed for a moment and he hadn’t realized that he’d been carrying so much of his worries in them around her. She came back with the water and took a seat next to him, angling her body to face him. He muttered a thank you as he sipped from it, unsure how to approach the situation.

“I wanted to thank you. For coming to the hospital to see me. That meant a lot.” He met her eyes and saw a flash of panic dance across her irises. How did he know she was there? Penelope probably told him, right? He couldn’t have heard her.

“Of course, Spencer. It’s the least I could do.” She smiled sweetly. His heart cleaved in his chest as he stared at the sweet girl in front of him. 

What did he ever do to deserve her friendship? 

He fidgeted with the glass in his hands, a silence beginning to drape over them.

“Is everything okay?” She asked, noticing his fidgeting. 

He took a deep breath and set the glass down on the coffee table in front of them. He turned his body to face her and reached for her soft hands. Her breath hitched at the intimate contact, butterflies erupting in the pit of her abdomen.

“You are a remarkable person, Y/N. I’m so lucky to have you in my life. I see the absolute worst that humanity has to offer on a daily basis, but you have made it your mission to make my life easier. And you do, honestly, I wouldn’t know what to do without you.” He said with soft eyes and a half-laugh. She smiled back, she could practically feel the rush from his words directly in her brain.

“And it is an honor to be loved by you,” his voice hesitated to say the word, his eyes darkening with regret as he continued. Realization snapped into place for her as he said, “but I can’t give you what you need.”

He had heard her. He knew.

Her blood ran cold as she tore her hands away from his, as if the skin on his hands had the ability to burn her. He frowned as he watched her frantic eyes search his for any semblance of dishonesty. Her throat closed up over all the words that fought to surface. She opened her mouth to say something but nothing came up. Instead, tears sprung to the corners of her eyes.

“What?” She whispered, brokenhearted and momentarily in disbelief.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.” He tried to console her but she was past the point of consolation. 

“I-I understand.” She nodded painfully, tears cascading down her face before she even got the chance to wipe them away, “It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have said anything, it’s completely unprofessional.” She swallowed an incoming sob as best as she could.

“No, I’m glad you told me, but if I’m being honest, I knew long before it. This isn’t about professionality, I don’t care about that. But I care about you, a lot.” Spencer said softly, staring at the young woman in front of him. She shook her head, utterly devastated and doing her best to shield herself from his gaze. Thoughts escaped her as her heart took a deep-dive to settle in her abdomen.

“And I thought I should let you know how I feel. I love you, Y/N,” he paused, “just not in that way.” The soft voice he used was completely useless against the harshness of the words. 

She tried, she tried her absolute hardest to suppress the incoming sob, but those words just about broke the dam. She rubbed at her eyes, nodding. He tried to set a comforting hand on her shoulder but decided against it. She took a deep breath and stood up from the couch. 

That was enough humiliation for the day.

“No, no, I completely understand.” She said, voice wobbly and eyes ringed with red. He frowned up at her at the sight of her being so upset. 

“Will you be okay?” He asked as he stood up from his seat. She laughed slightly, this man had devastated her, broken her heart with a few simple words and still wondered if she’d be okay. That’s Spencer Reid for you. The question made her heart ache and long for him more. His simplicity and good intentions made her question why the world wasn’t kind enough to let her have him.

“No, I won’t. And I probably won’t be okay for a long time. Because I will keep meeting men and keep comparing them to you so, until I stop doing that, no, I won’t be okay, Spencer.” She answered with a surprisingly stable voice. He frowned and nodded.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered, stepping forward to cup her cheek and gently use his thumb to wipe the remainder of her tears. Her glassy eyes bored right into his, her lips wobbling at the contact. She then closed her eyes and leaned her cheek into his palm, soaking in his warmth one last time before he tore himself away from her completely and showed himself out of the apartment without looking back.

That was when she allowed herself to fall apart. He heard her heart wrenching cries from behind the door and hesitated, but decided to walk away anyway with a chest heavy with regret.

She will never be enough for him, she thought.

He will never be enough for her, he thought.

[steelycunt]

hey!! idk if you have answers this before, but when do you think remus’ and sirius’ realization of their feelings for each other happened? (like, in a magical universe). And do you think they would have dated (or tried to, anyway) other people or would they have been like “It’s always been you and it will always be you, but I will continue to be an idiot for a bit longer for x, y, and z”?

<33

hii!! oo fun question. i saw jude recently give a really good answer to a similar question to this that i definitely agree with here !! (hope u dont mind me linking ur post jude but i just loved ur take on this!!). i also know i sound like a broken record here but i love the moment of sirius' realization in gamesformay's atyd ..that fic is so so special n correct to me so i have to mention it xox under the cut for my rambling !!

i definitely think sirius always knew that he felt differently abt remus than he did the other two, even if he couldnt immediately label those feelings on the train at the ripe old age of 11. i feel like very soon after he sort of sussed out that he was gay, he began to identify what those diff feelings meant, which i'd say wouldve been around 13-15? so at the later end conceivably around one of their first full moons!! but i can also imagine him younger than that just sitting in the hospital wing waiting for remus to wake up after a moon alone n then he does and he looks at sirius and sirius just thinks shit, or something really brief and muted, like being 14 and in class and smiling at each other from opposite ends of the room over some inside joke, and it makes sirius feel hot and jittery and off-kilter except this time he sort of gets why. i remember having this like abandoned drabble id written abt everyone laying about out on the grounds after summer exams together, and remus is sort of half asleep and that's when sirius glances over at him and really realizes, and i definitely picture it as some sort of quiet, young, fragile, slightly mundane moment like that <3

remus id say was a bit older!! but by the time/once the prank happens he's definitely aware that he's in love with sirius and probably always has been. he might've dated other people when he was younger but we're talking like...very modest 13-year-old style 'relationships'--i really dont think either of them would've dated seriously. by fifth year at the latest neither of them are going to date other people, even if they're not with each other yet. the thing with remus is i feel like sirius very much believes that remus isnt drawn in by the cockiness and the charm and the looks the way other people are. but he like...very much absolutely is, lol, although he's also completely deeply in love with the softer, more vulnerable/tender side of sirius that other people don't get to see. he's a dumb teenager and its terrible n predictable but he can't really help being swept away by his pretty, turbulent, incendiary best friend. i can imagine them pulling a prank off in, say, third year and sirius wrenching him into a broom cupboard to hide and big red lurid sirens going off in remus' head like fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck. but i also really like what jude said abt him maybe having an idea of how he felt, but finally really placing it after the prank, because he's confronted with this terrible thing sirius has done to him and the most resounding feeling is: but i love him doesn't it matter that i love him. doesn't that count for anything doesn't he realize wasn't that enough to stop him from doing something like this to me? but it obviously wasn't. and remus loves him anyway.

[it-was-all-a-beautiful-dream]

Opposites attract (Paul Lahote x Reader)

Warnings: swearing? I don't really think there are any tbh. 

Word count : 2.2k

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Sweet as pie. That’s the way people tend to describe you. So why on earth did you ever think that bad boy Paul Lahote would ever like you? It was stupid really. You’d had a crush on him since you were little and it didn’t seem to stop there. It wasn’t a phase you grew out of. Everything inside you screamed when he was near. But he hardly noticed you at all. None of the guys on the res did. At least, you didn’t think they did. You’d given up hope a long time ago that he would ever see you more than just a little girl he’d grown up with. 

Leah Clearwater, your best friend thought you were stupid. She didn’t understand why someone as nice as you would waste your time liking him anyway. He was hot headed, a flirt and extremely unpredictable. Leah didn’t like him partly because he was a member of Sams group, they had always been friendly but something had changed within some of the guys on the res. They were closer than ever now, like a little gang. It wasn’t only the boys who had changed, you’d notice a change in Leah too, maybe it wad because of all she had gone through, you couldn’t put your finger on it.

Leah and Sam had dated for three years, one day Sam up and left, no explanation, leaving Leah lost and alone. Then he decided to reappear and instead of giving Leah an explanation, broke up with her and started pursuing Leah’s cousin Emily young instead. Let’s just say she didn’t really get along with the guys anymore, or Emily, who she used to be so close with. You were her rock and she was yours. You know she never wanted to see you go through the same heartbreak. 

It was summer break and you and Leah had decided to get away for a few weeks. Being surrounded by the same people day in and out got a bit much. Especially when you lived in the small community you did. You hadn’t gone too far away, only to Vancouver. It was just nice to have some freedom, be somewhere no one knew you. Leah was relieved to get away, it just meant she wouldn’t have to be around Sam as much. While you were studying a higher education, she had started a mechanic apprenticeship with the one and only Sam Uley, it was her best opportunity, even if she didn’t like to spend time near him, that’s what she told you anyway. 

It was your second week in Vancouver, you’d been sightseeing, visiting museums that would help with your studies but you also just took the time to relax. Everything was going amazing. Until that night.

The fancy restaurant had been your idea, you had both been enjoying your time away, but for some reason since arriving in Vancouver you’d been feeling off. Your mood swings were off the charts and you didn’t understand why, you never wanted to take anything out on Leah, you didn’t even have a reason to be moody, and yeah it was summer, but somedays you felt overly hot, like you had a fever and then it would disappear like it was nothing. This friend date was a way for you to make it up to her. She didn’t seem bothered by your change in attitude though, she seemed more concerned if anything.

You were both sat in the restaurant waiting for your food to arrive, talking about silly shit, laughing together obnoxiously, drinks flowing thanks to your fake ID, everything was going perfect until three men came floating through the front door. They were stunning. Absolutely beautiful. At this point you were sure you were staring, one of the men turned his head, caught your eye and winked at you flashing a toothy grin. You blushed and looked away, Leah kicked you under the table.

“What, he’s good looking, the red contact lenses are a bit strange though.” You titled your head to the side pondering the thought, not realising that Leah had gone extremely quiet. Then something weird happened. Your body started heating up like it had done in the past few days, your palms were sweaty, your hands shook a little and your head started to ache. You felt weird. You couldn’t focus. Leah was saying your name but you couldn’t really hear her, it was a little muffled and then…. then nothing. You were feeling alright again. You looked up Leah’s face one of terror mixed with concern. 

“Do you wanna get out of here? I saw a burger van on the way we could just go back to the room.” You nodded. Not feeling the fancy atmosphere anymore. Maybe you should see a Doctor. 

-Leah’s POV-

“Of all the places we could go, there’s leaches here too?” Leah was pissed, this is what she had been hoping to get away from but fate was a bitch. Not only that, but she was pretty sure her best friend was going through the change in front of her very eyes. She guessed she wasn’t the only female shifter anymore. 

At one point she had paused during the dinner. Actually at a couple of points. The first, when she had watched you sip two cocktails like they were water. She was impressed, goodie-too-shoes who? Second, when the leaches walked in through the very crowded restaurant, and third, when the pack back home had heard Leah’s thoughts, the boys were worked up. Sam being Sam, was ordering Leah back immediately, worried she would accidentally phase putting you at risk. Also, they were worried that you would shift for the first time. They all knew how unpredictable it could be. One little thing could set you off and BOOM, shift in front of hundred of humans. Leah being Leah liked to defy Sam, so it came as no shock that she refused to cut the trip short. She did have a valid point though, what would she tell Y/N? 

Leah was glad when she’d manage to persuade you to leave the building, burgers were actually sounding like a good idea right about now. Watching you sit and get wasted was fun, but she wished she could join in sometimes and not have to pretend. She was worried that the Vamps would follow after catching her scent. If they knew what was good for them, they’d stay away.

Leah kept on looking at you, she could sense something was wrong, she knew the signs having gone through them herself. One minute y/n was fine, the next sweating, the next she looked pissed, as much as Leah liked to handle things on her own, this was a big thing to deal with and she knew it, so it came as no surprise to her when Sam mind linked to say that a few of the guys were already on their way to your hotel to bring you guys home. She hated to admit that she was relieved. She looked to you again, now you were happily munching on your food, caught up in thought. 

“Hey Y/N, so uh, some of the guys from the Res are in Vancouver, how funny is that.” Leah laughed nervously, looking at your for any reaction. She watched as you screwed your nose up and then blushed. Her friends eyes widened. 

“That’s cool, Vancouver’s a big place though, I don’t think we have to worry about bumping into them. Weird how they ended up in the same place. I wonder if Paul is here…. I haven’t seen him in forever, it’s bound to have been at least 6 months by now.” Leah rolled her eyes and smiled at her best friend. She was still day dreaming over stupid Paul. She didn’t know what she found so fascinating about him. Sometimes you can’t help having a crush. Leah frowned. She knew all about how it could end up. 

“Who knows Y/N, fate is a funny thing, I wouldn’t worry about Paul, he’s normally caught up in his ego to notice other people anyway, if he didn’t notice you now he’s a lost cause, cause girl you look hawt.” Leah grinned and nudged Y/N with her arm, Y/N nudged her back and chuckled. It was almost 11pm by the time you made it back to the hotel lobby, you’d only just stepped in when you heard a noise from behind you. Leah turned around. Standing on the opposite side of the road were the Vampires that she’d seen only a couple of hours earlier. She growled lowly under her breath. Her mind focused on one thing only. Keeping you safe. 

“It’s okay Leah were almost there, just putting our clothes on.” Embry. His voice came through the link. Good, they were almost here. Hopefully when the vamps caught whiff of more shifters they’d leave for good. There’s no way they could shift in the middle of a city without being seen. 

Leah had told Y/N to wait at the bar for her while she “Took a call outside,” which really meant she was just waiting for the guys and making sure the vamps didn’t get through the door. When she turned her head she saw her friend chatting to the the bar man, flirting and sipping on more cocktails. She scoffed and rolled her eyes, god you were amazing. Not a care in the world. She frowned knowing soon enough your life wouldn’t be as simple. Her thoughts were interrupted when she heard growling, the boys had arrived and obviously the Vamps now got the memo because they ran off when they realised there was back up. 

Leah could finally relax, Embry, Quil, Jake and oh god.. Paul.. arrived just in time. Grinning at the she wolf like the idiots they were. 

“Took you long enough.” Leah smirked and elbowed Jake playfully. Paul was about to retort but he stopped and sniffed the air. The rest of the present pack looked confused. Leah turned around and noticed her friend walking towards them all with a shocked expression on her half drunk face. 

Then it all made sense. 

-Paul’s POV- 

God what a mess. Paul was pissed off as per. He’d had to cancel a date he had on his one night off to go and save Leah’s and Y/N’s ass’ in Vancouver. Of all nights. He obviously didn’t hesitate when Sam gave the orders, as much as it pissed him off he knew that if another pack member needed him he’d do everything he could to help, you were family. Not to mention, he as well as everyone else, didn’t need some new pup exposing the tribe secrets. Shifting in public would be good for no one. 

On the way the boys talked through the link, communicating with Leah periodically, making sure the Vamps had stayed well away. 

“So, when was the last time anyone actually saw Y/N?” Jake was the first to start the conversation. When was the last time Paul had seen you? He couldn’t remember, if he had to think about it, probably before her shifted, it had been a while, he knew you’d been studying higher education, and with all of the pack stuff, he didn’t tend to see anyone else other than his wolf brothers and sister. 

“I saw her not long ago, she was in the convenience store picking up groceries for her Pops, and damnnn she’s changed, not a little girl anymore.” Quil joked through the link, wolf whistling. Paul smirked, yeah right, he had always thought you were pretty, but you couldn’t have changed that much, you were still the little, younger dork that had grown up on the res. 

The conversation was cut short as they reached the outline of the trees, Sam had tied a bag of clothes around each of the wolves so when they shifted they could change instead of walking around in the nude. Maybe it would fly in the woods back home, but not in the middle of a city. They made light work of getting to the hotel and scaring the blood suckers away. Pussies. When they met Leah at the entrance. Paul wasn’t really focusing on the banter, he was too distracted by a familiar but heavenly scent. He sniffed trying to place it and then he saw her. 

Walking towards the group was Y/N. Her eyes a little glossy Paul could smell the alcohol, it wasn’t however, strong enough to cover up the heavenly scent he could smell radiating off the pup to be. 

"It's not like love at first sight, really. It's more like… gravity moves… suddenly. It's not the earth holding you here anymore, she does… You become whatever she needs you to be, whether that's a protector, or a lover, or a friend.” 

Jacobs words about imprinting ran in Paul’s head and his world suddenly tilted. The pack paused behind him, the wolves howling in his head through the bond. Leah looked shocked and the other guys just looked stupidly happy. 

Y/N was Paul’s imprint.

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As per usual, please let me know what you thought in the comments below and if you want to be tagged in future let me know xx 

PT2 --------------- click here!

[truglori]

Sneaky Link 🔗

Synopsis: Black Reader and Eric find each other online!

Pairing: Erik Stevens x Black Reader

Warning: Language, Smutt, Raw sex

Flopping on the bed Y/N found herself bored for the fourth Friday night in a row. This was supposed to be the season of hook ups and living her best carefree lifestyle that she had planned out but yet is was the exact opposite. Being on summer break from college Y/N had to come back home with the schools being closed. It was something she dreaded.

Home for her wasn’t the best place to be. Between her judgmental and nagging parents and older brother, Chris, Y/N was ecstatic when she discovered that she would be going to a school that was over three hundred miles away. Being four hours away gave her enough freedom knowing that she didn’t have any one breathing down her neck or snitching to her parents about whatever she did. With it only being her sophomore year Y/N loved the college lifestyle.

Getting up she went to her window to open it and put in her square fan. Her air conditioner that she always kept in her room was now being used by her brother so she had to settle for this. Turning the knob she felt the warm cool breeze coming through and taking up the room. Walking back to her bed she logged into her laptop going onto the web browser. Clicking the history she found the website she was searching for and tapped it.

Quick Link popped up on her screen. It was a site that allowed people to meet and chat with other people. Even though Y/N has been going on it for weeks now back and forth, she never met one person that she has chatted with yet. She was okay with talking to them online and even over the phone but the thought of seeing them in person scared her. With all of the Lifetime movies and ID channel she would watch, doing something as small as meeting up with them could be dangerous.

Y/N scrolled through her recent messages. She had over ninety-nine notifications. She knew that she wasn’t going to reply to them all, only the once she found cute. It was like a broken record being played. They all inbox her with the same messages, hey sexy! Y/N rolled eyes at the un-originality. To her it seem like the guys didn’t even try to put in any effort.

Tapping on the keyboard she began to text back the handful that she found attractive when she got two notifications. Hurrying up her sentence she exited out of the chat and clicking on her new direct messages.

HandsomeAssNigga👅- Y/N, what in the hell is yo ass doing on this shit...10:35pm

HandsomeAssNigga👅- And I know you still online. I can see the green bubble by ya picture...10:36pm

Y/N squinted at the name. Who the hell was this texting her like they knew her? The question alone made her stomach flutter at the idea of getting caught on a dating site by someone she knew or knew her. Clearly this person recognized her enough to boldly message her. Clicking on their username she went to their page. Her heart stopped and thighs clenched at the same time.

It was Erik fucking Stevens aka her brother’s childhood best friend. Chris and Erik were the same age and only three years older than Y/N. Growing up Y/N stayed crushing on Erik. It was his braids that he rocked back in the day that had her drooling over him but also how nice he was to her. Y/N remembered the time when she was a freshman in high school and Chris and Erik were both Juniors she would always get a ride with them every morning in his 2005 Honda Accord. He would steal glances at her through his rear view mirror that only she would catch but to afraid to ask him about it.

There would be times that she would find underwear from a girl tucked under the backseat. Y/N heard about the rumored that went around the school that Erik was a player. An experienced one at that. He was grown before his time and with the way the lucky girls who had a chance to sleep with him describe it, he gave dick like he was a grown man as well.

Hearing that did nothing but spark the flame that she felt about him. She wanted to experience it herself. But being the quiet and timid person she was then, she never did. It wasn’t until Y/N went to college where she lost her virginity her freshman and started having sex on the regular with her ex who was also her first. From the first few times they did it, she could never cum from penetration. Y/N thought it was normal and that every girl dealt with it until she shared a few stories with her friends and they would tell her about the way their guys would make them squirt.

Squirting was something Y/N always wanted to do but could never achieve with her guy. She loved feeling him inside of her stretching her open but he was a quick pumper. He came too fast for her and couldn’t last long enough to get her to nut. So after every session she would take her bullet and tortured her clit until she felt her cream escaping her hole. Not having sex since the last time she was at school had Y/N body extremely horny and hot and ready like a little ceasars pizza.

Clicking through his pictures had her clenching her thighs. After he graduated high school, the graduation was the last place she seen Erik. She wasn’t even sure if Chris and him were still close friends. But what she could say is that he grew up very nice. He now had dreads that hung over his eyes with a clean shape up to top it off. His teeth pearly and white accompanied by gold canines he was wearing in every other picture and last but not least his body was everything. Standing at 6’3 and looking like a solid 215 from her view Erik was fine as fuck.

Giggling and embarrassed with herself she replied back.

BlackBeauty- Erik omg...this is so embarrassing. How did you find me?...10:40pm

Biting the nail on her thumb she waited for him to answer her. To her surprise he wrote back fairly faster than what she expected.

HandsomeAssNigga👅- Noticed yo little ass on the explore page. I know you not on here meeting with these wack ass niggas...10:42pm

She laughed re-reading his message. To her it sound like it was possessive but she didn’t want to over think it.

BlackBeauty- Never!! I am not stupid. I haven’t met one person yet...10:44pm

Hitting the send button she rolled her eyes noticing herself getting desperate from his attention.

HandsomeAssNigga👅-Okay bet! I don’t wanna have to fuck you up youngin 😈...10:47pm

Biting her lip, she stared down the emoji. She wondered what that meant. She wondered in what way did he meant when he said he would fuck her up. At this point Y/N was dripping between her thick thighs.

BlackBeauty- What about you? I know you out here fucking these bitches you meet on here. Don’t lie lol...10:49pm

Y/N didn’t want to seem nosy, she was just trying to make conversation.

HandsomeAssNigga👅- Damn you cuss now? And second of all don’t be worried about what I do with my dick. I’m grown and that’s different...10:51pm

Bringing a hand down to her covered pussy Y/N caressed it. The warmth coming through her panties and cotton shorts. She didn’t know what it was but the way he was responding had her feeling a type of way. She wasn’t the shy young girl anymore he used to know and she wanted to make that clear.

BlackBeauty- I’m grown too Erik 💦...10:53pm

Her heart beat sped up when she sent the text not knowing how he was going to respond.

HandsomeAssNigga👅- To who? I know ya young ass ain’t out here fuckin yet. You was too shy for that last time I saw you. Even if you was, I know you ain’t getting know real dick...10:55pm

HandsomeAssNigga👅- What’s that emoji supposed to represent? Ya pussy or sum shit? Let me find out Y/N 👿...10:56pm

There goes that little devil that had her questioning herself again.

BlackBeauty- I get dick on the regular. Good dick! And yes Erik that emoji reps my pussy. Same young pussy that’ll be too wet for you to handle! I’ll have you drownin in my shit...10:59pm

Y/N could always talk a good game online. It was where she could be get as nasty as she wanted without actually putting in work. The guys who would hit her up loved her foreplay that she had spit over the internet and she was fortunate enough where they never pressed her to meet in person.

HandsomeAssNigga👅- Bring that pussy here and I’ma show you if I’ll drown in it. Stop fucking playing with me Y/N if you not gonna pull up. I don’t do this back and forth teasing shit. You tryna do a Sneaky Link or what?...11:02pm

Checking the hall Y/N seen that the lights were off. Her parents were most likely sleeping and Chris always worked Friday nights. This was the perfect time and opportunity to leave. She would have to sneak the keys from the key holder and use her dad’s car to get to his place. Y/N didn’t do this on the regular but because it was Erik she was curious. She wanted to see for herself if all of the rumors were true. Y/N was going to fuck him tonight.

BlackBeauty- Send me the addy..I’m on my way...11:04pm

________

After showering and preparing for her dick appointment Y/N successfully snuck out of the house. She put his address in her GPS. It was a twenty minute drive to get to his apartment. Putting the car in park and turning it off, Y/N felt the butterflies in her stomach grow while walking into the building. Taking her phone out she went to his message and looking up the apartment number he gave her. Apartment 3B.

Knocking on the door. She held her hands together tightly. She was beyond nervous and rethinking her decision as her heart kept thumping. She couldn’t believe that she was really going to go through this. After so many years of fantasizing about him in her room she was finally going to see the real thing. Y/N only wondered if it was as good as she hoped.

The door swung open showing Erik sipping on a glass of dark liquor. In nothing but a tight wife beater that clung to his chest and his sweats that hung low Y/N could see the print poking through so visibly. It looked like he was free balling it.

“Damn ma. You wasn’t lying about getting grown. You look good as shit.” Erik sipped from his glass. He stepped aside inviting her in.

Y/N smiled softly going inside. She only took a few steps in and stood to the side waiting for him. She heard the door lock behind her as it caused her to gulp hard on her spit.

Erik eyed her with his low eyes. He chuckled seeing that she was clearly nervous.

“So that’s ya thing?” His voice was low and deeper than what she remembered.

“What’s my thing?” Her soft voice speaking up.

“Talking shit online but quiet it person.” He stated putting her on the spot.

Y/N smacked her lips and rolled her eyes. “Whatever.” She turned facing his livingroom.

“Nah ain’t no whatever. What’s good ma? Where that big girl energy go?” He walked up behind her pressing his body into hers. The hand that wasn’t holding his cup wrapped around her waist gripping the small pudge on her stomach.

Y/N shivered when she felt his dick on her ass. Her assumption was right. He wasn’t wearing any underwear beneath his sweats. She could feel the coldness of his chains on her shoulder when he leaned on her due to her only wearing a tank top. She grabbed his hand, not pushing him away but holding on to him.

“I’m here aren’t I?” She gazed at him over her shoulder.

He smirked at her smart remark. “You need anything before we start? A drink, blunt, something to help you calm ya scary ass down.” He teased.

She pushed his hand from around her waist and folded her arms. “I’m not scary Erik. If I was I wouldn’t be here.”

“Then why you barely saying shit?” He licked his lips.

Y/N shrugged. “It’s just been a while since I saw you. You look...different.” Playing with her diamond earning, she occupied her fingers.

“I may look different but I’m still the same Erik that used to jack ya brother up every time he fucked with you when no one was looking. Ain’t shit changed about me ma so you can relax. I’m tryna take care of you tonight.” He spoke stepping closer.

They were now face to face. Y/N’s frame staring up into his 6’3 one. When she would inhale she could smell his expensive cologne mix with the Hennessy he’s been sipping on since she got here.

“Okay.” She answered with a bite of her bottom lip.

Erik groaned at the action. Both of his hands behind his back now, he bent down to her level to meet her halfway. “C’mere.” He demanded a kiss with messy dreads hanging over his eyes.

Meeting him where he was, Y/N listened giving him one. The taste of the dark liquor transferring over to her taste buds from his tongue invading her mouth. The warmth of it made her melt under him and causing her head to lean back. She was already growing weak just from the kiss.

Erik reached behind her slapping her ass and gripping it with his free hand. “Fuck you doing all that for and I ain’t even do shit yet.” He spoke against her lips peaking through his eyelids.

“Hurry up then daddyy.” Y/N whined.

“That’s my name for the night? I like that shit.” He walked them backwards until they reached his room which wasn’t far away from the front.

Placing his glass down on his dresser he lifted her up by her thighs, picking her up. Y/N squealed from the unexpected action. She held onto his neck hoping he wouldn’t drop her. Erik chuckled playing with her ass cheeks before laying her down on the bed gently.

“You sucked dick before...miss grown?” Bringing his hand down, he massaged his print through his sweats.

Leaning up on the palm of her hands, Y/N nodded answering yes. She did it plenty of times with her ex, who she could make cum quickly off of head alone but the way Erik was grabbing his tool made her think differently.

“So what’s up then? Come show me what that mouth do?”

Kicking off her sandals Y/N got off the bed. His eyes stayed glued to her. Getting on her knees in front of him she tugged the sides of the grey sweats and pulled them down to his mid thigh. His dick sprung out almost hitting her in the face had she been centimeters closer.

Long and thick was what it was. A beautiful smooth brown texture covered his heavy package. Y/N felt her mouth watered thinking about how her cream and juices would look being all over it. This man was truly blessed and so far proving the rumors to be true.

Erik twisted his hips side to side wagging it in front of her. He lifted the wife beater up and tucked it under his chin so that he can get a good view.

Grabbing the base of his length Y/N eyed it. She was trying to figure out ways to be able to swallow this monster without choking. Sticking her tongue out she tapped his tip against it. A string from her saliva on her tongue being attached to his head every time they separated. With her prior experience and watching porn she grew to have her own technique.

Y/N allowed the spit to build up in her mouth when she sucked on his tip. No nigga likes dry head and she wasn’t going to start giving it today. She wanted it to be extra sloppy for Erik. Tightening her jaws she went up and down on his dick. Taking only about four inches of him and using her spit to stroke the rest of him. With just the little bit of his length she was able to take she could already feel him reaching her back.

“Fuck that throat feel good. Shitt!” Erik groaned gripping her tight kinky curls and putting them into a ponytail. He tilted his head watching her go stupid on his dick. He sucked in his lower lip when she began to swivel her head around.

Long drips of spit went falling down on her black tank top. Erik’s eyebrows scrunched up the moment he felt her take his balls in her mouth and suck on them lightly while stroking his tip. His stomach started to tighten and his toes dug into his carpet. This girl was trying to take his soul the way she sucking him up.

“Man whatchu doing Y/N?” Erik asked amazed, closing his eyes for a second. He couldn’t remember the last time he had head this good.

“I’m showing you that I’m grown daddy.” She answered coming up.

Now both of her hands were focused on playing with his balls while she sucked his tip and some of the few inches she was able to reach. Her eyes stared into his not stopping at all. She had him right where she wanted him. She could tell from the way his breathing sped up that he was getting weak and ready to bust a nut. Y/N tightened her suction to make it happen when she felt him pull her off by her hair.

Erik took one hand gripping her spit covered chin and tilted her head up to look at him. “Fuck is you doing sucking my dick like that ma? You tryna make me hold you hostage for the whole night?” He asked seriously.

Y/N giggled. “I just wanna make you cum Daddy.” She reached for his tip and gripped it making him jerk forward.

Erik smacked his lips annoyed that she had him feeling like sensitive. “Chill with that. Let me fuck you first before you suck this nut out.”

Helping her up and placing her back on the bed Erik slide off her biker shorts tossing them somewhere. Underneath them she had on some cotton hipster panties with little rainbows spreaded everywhere. Erik laughed when he seen it.

“Why you wearing shit like this ma?” He teased stepping out of his pants and getting on the bed.

“Because it’s cute. Why you worried about what I’m wearing instead of taking them off?” Y/N mocked his question.

Erik smirked bringing his hand up to the piece of cloth and ripping them straight down the middle and threw them on the ground. A gasp left Y/N lips as she was shocked from him doing that. Slapping his forearm, her lips went into a pout becoming upset.

“Erik, I just brought those two weeks ago.” She smacked the hand that was rubbing her thigh.

“You said to take them off. My bad. That’s the way I usually do it.” He lifted her legs by the back of her thighs while he consoled her as a distraction.

Y/N was frustrated at the fact that he ripped her new panties but also that she wasn’t going to have any to wear back home after this link.

“I don’t care how you do it, you shouldn’t have- ohh shiitt!” Her rant was cut off with the sound of moans leaving her mouth.

Holding her legs by the back of her knees Y/N glanced down to see Erik flicking her clit. The tip of his tongue felt wet and firm, in a good way. She really started to feel it when he took one hand and spread her phat pussy lips. Now her clit was out in the open and more accessible. Erik’s eyes met hers through his dreads when his lips wrapped around her bud and began to suck.

“Mm fuck...daddyy!” The sensation had Y/N’s hips thrusting to meet his vacuum like suction. So powerful and wet.

“I want you to cum on this fuckin tongue!” His words were muffled by the lips of her pussy surrounding his but it was enough to reach her ears. Taking a hand he smacked her outer thigh making his demand clear.

Her warm and slick juices ran out of her opening. It was something about the way he commanded her to nut that made her wetter and willing. Y/N liked to be dominated. Lifting up the tank top and pulling it up to her chest she tweaked and flipped her nipples adding to the stimulation. For her the feeling of having her nipples played with while getting her pussy ate made her orgasm a hundred times better.

“Eat this fucking pussy b-babyy-“ She whimpered feeling a tear slide down the corner of her eye.

Even though he noticed it, Erik didn’t stop. The juices that he caught in his mouth made it hard. He loved a good tasting ass pussy. Y/N definitely had one. Moving his assault from her clit he put his tongue in her tight opening. He began to fuck her with it. Erik put his hands under her ass cheeks and got a good cuff before bringing her back and forth on his stiff tongue. With the way her legs were still in the air he could see Y/N toes curl the second he started the action. She began leaking so quickly. Erik chuckled inwardly when he felt her walls squeezing on him.

“Mhm.” He moaned teasing her.

Y/N was cumming from the second time just off of his mouth alone. She reached down to rub her clit while he stuck his tongue deep inside her. She ain’t never got head this good before back at college. Her thighs began to shake as she felt another mini orgasm hit. Her pussy growing sensitive and overstimulated.

Grabbing his dreads she lifted his head up. “Daddy you was eating my pussy so good. Fuckk!” She moaned with a quiver in her voice.

“Now I’m bout to beat this pussy up real good too. Turn around. I want that ass from the back.” Erik barked getting on his knees.

Swiftly taking off her tank top, Y/N turned around like he said and got on all fours. She felt a firm smack to her right ass cheek. Moaning she rocked back and forth and twerked each cheek individually. Y/N looked over her shoulder behind her seeing Erik watching her move it so effortlessly. His hands went up to her waist and pulled her closer to him. Now she could feel her mound rubbing against his bare hard rock hard stick.

“Doing all this ass shaking, you better not try to run from the dick. I don’t want none of that.” He gripped a cheek spreading it watching her pussy lips follow.

“I’m not gon run daddy..I promise.” She reassured him softly.

Erik gripped the base of his length. Smacking it against her her clit he played with it for a while to warm her up. When he heard her moaning and seen her backing up against him he knew she was ready. Erik sent a drip of spit on the tip of his dick and rubbed it over it with a free hand. He teasingly dipped in and out of her tight hole. Y/N pussy was tight as fuck and he knew he had to work his way in. Getting deeper and deeper with each inch her warm wet walls clung on to him.

“Ooh fuck!” Y/N eyes closed not expecting him to feel like this. Erik was stretching her pussy out. Her arms sprawled out in front of her gripping his sheets.

“Tight ass pussy you got. What happened to getting dick on the regular? Hmm?” Holding her down by the small of her back Erik made her arch deeper as he stroked her slick walls.

Y/N’s mouth couldn’t close or make a sound. From the position he had her in she couldn’t move or run if she wanted to. Pinned down and made to take it. Erik was dicking her down. His heavy fat dick busting her pussy open and touching her stomach. Fuck that. He was putting it in her chest. Y/N reached behind her to hold on to his wrist while he pounded her pussy with precision. Her face smashed into the bed. His dick was too good for her.

“Ooh baby... Daddy don’t fuck me like this!” She shouted not knowing what she was saying. Y/N didn’t want him to stop but she couldn’t handle the pressure he was putting on her bladder.

Erik didn’t have just a big dick that could stretch a pussy out. He knew how to fuck with it. When he stroked he didn’t use his whole body he worked his hips and that’s what drove bitches crazy about him. Erik would fuck like he was trying to make a baby.

“I thought you came here to get fucked?” He asked lifting off her. He bended one knee and balanced his weight on his foot pressing it into the bed. His hand wrapped around her throat as he caught a rhythm making her throw it back on him.

The sound of skin clapping filled the room. Y/N’s arch was now the deepest it’s ever been with Erik choking her from behind and making her head tilt up towards the ceiling. Cramping in her stomach let her know that she was about to break. She was finally about to cum from penetration alone. His curved tip would press on a spot she didn’t know she had there causing her legs to convulse. Her whimpers and moans only encouraged him to keep doing what he was doing. Which was tearing her pussy up.

“Shiitt!!” She cursed grabbing onto her titty to have something to hold on.

Erik bit his lip seeing her ass tremble from her orgasm and feeling her squeezing his dick with a vice grip. He slapped her left cheek before pulling out to flip her over on her back. Looking down at his meat it was covered in her creamy juices. His dick jumped at the sight.

“Good ass pussy.” He mumbled in a trance.

Using the weight of his hips he thrusted finding his way back inside of her. The warm wet tunnel closing in on him. Erik lifted up the wife beater that was still on in the mist, and brought it up under his chin tucking it to move it out of his way. His hands found the back of her thighs and pinned them against her chest. He began stroking and getting deeper from the angle.

Being trapped from his hold that he had on her, the only thing Y/N could do was bring her hands to his hips trying to interrupt his movements. Y/N didn’t like this feeling. He was going too deep. Deeper than what she was used to. Shaking her head from side to side she pushed at his hips that only kept going due to her weak and trembling arms not being able to produce enough strength.

“Move ya fuckin hands.” He demanded while keeping his steady stroke. Erik cussed under his breath hearing the smacking sounds coming from her hole that could be mistaken for a pot of mac and cheese being stirred. That’s how good Y/N pussy was.

Her tight walls gripped his dick. Erik looked between their bodies watch the beautiful art being made. Her pussy following him whenever he pulled out to the tip just to be sucked back in. Pussy as good and wet as hers always got him to bust hard. He was close. Leaning down to her neck he kissed and sucked her skin while having her pinned down taking his length. Erik felt her walls slick up and knew she was about to nut again.

“Let that shit go mama.” He whispered in her neck.

Y/N’s nails scratched against his back. Her eyes wailed up with tears feeling the pressure in her stomach building up. She lost count of how many times he had made her cum tonight but she knew she was grateful and only prayed that this wasn’t the last time she got dick this bomb.

“Unhh.” She couldn’t produce any words. Her toes curled as she gazed at the ceiling feeling her body shake.

“There you go.” He pecked her neck.

Erik talked her through her nut while he continued to chase his. It wasn’t long before he felt his dick throb and grow inside of her. Pulling out he climbed on top of her holding his body up with one hand pressed into the bed as he stroked his dick with the other. Y/N opened her mouth and sucked his tip. She could feel his seed spilling on her tongue and traveling down her throat. She wasn’t usually a swallower but the way he had just fucked her he deserved to have his dick milked.

“Ahh shit!” Erik cursed caressing her jaw as he watched her suck him dry. She was cleaning both her juices and his nut off of his dick.

A popping sound escaped her mouth when she released him. Y/N’s body couldn’t move as she laid back staring at him with disbelief. Erik caught her face expression.

“What?” He asked standing on the side of the bed.

“Nothing. It’s just the rumors that I heard about you were all true. You do give some good dick.” Turning to lay on her side Y/N smiled.

Erik laughed. “Yeah well I could say the same about you.”

Her brows knitted in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“Little birdy that goes to your college told me about how good ya pussy was. Had to find out for myself.” He smirked at her.

“Erik what are you talking about?” Y/N sat up.

“I’m talking about your ex that you fuck from time to time is my second cousin. Nigga couldn’t stop running his mouth about you. Small world ain’t it?”

He paused watching the confusion clouding over her face. “Besides why else you think I had hit you up tonight? It damn sure wasn’t to reminisce over the past.”

Taking off the wife beater, Erik leaned down to kiss her lips before walking away.

______________________________________

Please excuse any mistakes!

Tag-List

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[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

HI i just wanted to say that i really enjoy your twilight metas (as those are the only ones ive read so far) and you're a genius. it's awesome to me how realistically you think about characters and the plot, which i have never been able to do because i always get confused. thank you especially for your post about jacob and how the fandom treats him bc ive always had mixed feelings! i love him (the fanon/new moon him ofc) but i also felt rly weird about the whole SA thing, especially as a brown boy thats been villainized (i didnt SA anyone i just realized how that sounds) i understood that it had racist roots but it still...happened, yk? anyways u put it beautifully and its alot easier to understand how i feel about him now. also like everything else u post about!! i despise the cullens w my every being but its so entertaining to see their dynamic and actions laid out. mostly bc it solidifies my hatred but anyways. they also kind of change my views on other characters, like i always kinda liked bella (i dont like alot of things she does but alot of the fan content i see on her made her feel rly relatable) and its rly interesting to see that she would be a kind of absent parent, bc id never considered it like that and it makes so much sense and woah. u have so much evidence to back up ur theories and opinions too--i tend to get lost in fanon but i dont rly do that w ur posts! even ones where ur spitballing its just muah chefs kiss i love. i write alot of self fulfilling fanfiction and tbh it does not feel the same when the characters r too ooc and ur posts have helped a fuck ton! ur super cool and i love ur stuff keep going :)

i do have some questions tho u dont have to acknowledge it at all and ik you tend to focus more on the cullens, but what do you think the wolf pack is like now that jacob, leah, and seth have left, and now that they have so many new members? do you think any other girls would have shifted and how would they be treated? ik leah was kind of alienated in canon not only bc shes a girl but also bc of her feelings, and i cant tell if the pack would be wary of her/treat her the same as leah, or if they would have learned their lesson.

have a good day!

Well first, thank you, I'm very flattered. I'm going to go ahead and acknowledge @therealvinelle here as well as she's I believe the one who originally posted the post about the very complicated topic of Jacob Black and his terrible choices throughout the series.

As for your questions there are a few pack questions in my inbox but it's mostly a matter that people keep asking questions about Bella and she keeps getting eaten.

Also, I'm not sure you want me answering these questions. Like all of Twilight, it's a bleak pit of despair.

But here we go

What About the Pack/Tribe After Breaking Dawn

There's a lot of shit going on in the tribe right now. Jacob leaving is just part of it.

They have an unprecedented number of shifters in the community and that's going to spell... a lot of issues in the years to come.

Namely, per Sam and Emily, domestic violence will be through the roof and kept very hushed up for the understandable reason of these people look like they were mauled by bears. This will also likely increase the number of deaths in the tribe, especially among those who are young. Accidents happen, it's not good, this is going to have a devastating impact on the people.

You also have a lot of angry, disaffected, young men who can no longer really be a part of society. They can't really attend school, can't even really leave the reservation for fear of turning into a wolf, they can't hold a job, at the age of nineteen or younger they each had their futures ripped away from them.

Some, Seth, handle this very well (possibly because he hasn't clued into what this means yet), others like Jake... do not. These people have had their lives turned upside down and in some cases utterly ruined: that's not good in any society.

Then you have the imprinting, lord, the imprinting.

To date, there's the Sam, Emily, and Leah disaster. The three of them handled it very well, but it still utterly destroyed Leah's life and emotional stability. Not helping, of course, is that Leah has had her very identity taken from her, has no privacy, and her only option of escape is to follow Jacob around which... we'll get to in a few paragraphs.

Added to that, you have the Claire/Quil disaster, in which the tribe is desperately trying to handle it by a) keeping it very quiet b) trying to make Quil just be the babysitter. That's unlikely to work out for them and is just angstfest all around and no one's fault.

And then, of course, Jacob/Renesmee. Jacob, having now imprinted, will follow Renesmee to the ends of the earth. He has no other purpose now. Which means that Leah and Seth, who are in his pack, get to follow along and uproot their lives. For the tribe this means they'll never be rid of the Cullens, not truly, and Billy has lost his son entirely. Not to mention it's guaranteed to go awful places.

Then you have the paternity questions this whole thing drudges up, the trauma of these children having to be sacred warriors and having slaughtered demons with human faces, many of whom were also once children and more.

The tribe and the pack are a goddamn mess.

Jacob imprinting on the Cullen hybrid daughter and leaving the tribe? Yeah, it's weird and no one likes it, but that isn't even the peak of the nonsense these people have to deal with.

Would the Other Girls Shift?

No.

Leah seems to have won the genetic shitty lottery. In 600 years of shifting, there has never been another woman, and Leah has all shifting bloodlines in her veins.

It seems Leah was just very unlucky.

Were other girls to shift I imagine they'd face much the same situation. Suddenly teenage boys are witnessing them naked, all the time, they have no choice to become sacred warriors (a role not typically meant for women and which will very much feel like 'the boy's club') and I don't get the idea that anyone learned anything from Leah.

Jake certainly didn't, he just thought she was Uber Bitch until she begged him to let her in his new pack and reminded him she was a human being with feelings.

The concept genuinely had not occurred to him.

TL;DR Remember kids, Twilight is despair

[4dtk]

NCT 127: finding out you're older than them

“Hey, can I request an NCT127 reaction to finding out you're actually older than them when they thought you were much younger than them? (like you look really young despite your age lol)” thank u for waiting honey <3 ps i just used random years that are older than the members!

enjoy! this was fun to write ^^

→ TAEIL would have his mouth in an ‘O’, but more of a ‘ooh cool!’ way where he’s nodding repeatedly to nothing seconds after you’ve spilled the beans. it sinks in more later when he thinks of your birth years side by side and he’s like omg! i’m finally not the oldest and it garners a laugh out of you that you don’t mind being called old by him. honestly, you don’t mind being called old at all by the other members, since technically you are taeil’s s/o. the members are closer to the male, so when they call him old, you join in lol

“woah hyung/noona! i can’t believe you now take the place of oldest in our group,” mark says, although gets a smack from haechan for saying that.

“ack! sorry taeil-hyung and (y/n)-hyung/(y/n)-noona, mark’s mouth is a little big today.”

taeil waves it off, curling an arm around your waist to bring you closer as mark avoids eye contact. slowly the members crowd around the four of you, interested in the topic that’s taking place. it was well over 11pm in the practice room, and having just ended dance practice, they cooled down by taking part in the conversation.

“yeah! you finally can call someone else old!” another smack and a whine from mark accompanied by an apologetic look that wasn’t seen often on donghyuck.

“i’m sorry for them,” taeil whispers with a laugh, placing a kiss onto your cheek before taking a swig of water from his bottle. he takes your shaking head as acceptance of your new position of the oldest, pleased when you return his kiss with one to his lips.

→ JOHNNY is the one to pull a dramatic face lol. you know the one where his mouth is in a ‘O’ and his eyebrows are knitted. the expression is playful, but there’s a bit of genuine shock behind it. recovers from it quickly tho and jokingly calls you ‘daddy/mommy’ to annoy you. i can see him calling you the term later if you get married or have kids though, just in a third person kinda way - something like a running joke from when he discovered you were older years ago.

“no way, you’re born in 1992?” his jaw is dropped, eyes wide that makes you smile just a little, “holy shit you’re old,” there’s a fit of laughter when your hand lands on his back as a form of retaliation (“like you’re not!”), but you agree either way, shrugging nonchalantly at the year of birth.

“then maybe now i can call you daddy/mommy,” you groan at that, shoving him for real now as he lands on the sofa behind him and doyoung at the dining table contemplates whether he should interfere. he decides not to when you full on attack your boyfriend, although with half-assed punches as johnny continues to moan out theatrically in between attacks, “but for real though, next time, i wanna hear voices calling you.”

“the fuck? you mean in like a horror movie way?”

“nah, in the i wanna have a family way.” you gulp with a surprised expression and you launch a badly timed attack that hits him in the balls. you’re apologising with a fluster, johnny is groaning in pain. oh well, this could be story to tell your kids or adopted babies next time.

→ TAEYONG is making surprised noises. it’s so cute lol that you’re the one ending up teasing him about it. taeyong forgets it sometimes, so you have the pleasure of seeing him react like a couple of times bc it finally settles in his mind that you’re older than him. other than that, yong loves you all the same and sometimes acts like a baby just so you’d cave and take care of him. he argues that it’s only the right way! older s/o? you take care of me! i want to be babied.

“huh? you’re older than me?” taeyong asks, mindlessly digging through your stuff until he comes across your ID. he curiously sifts through the information on it, but the number of your birth year seemed to stand out the most.

you hum, placing the last bits of your mask on yourself as you turn back to your boyfriend with a similar look: hair band pushing his dyed hair back, with a mask like yours on his face.

a noise of approval spills from taeyong’s mouth, and you’re left giggling in confusion until he explains his reason for it. you nod through it, happy to give your boyfriend what he wants while he takes his place in your arms. “feels nice,” taeyong mumbles, loving the way you’re playing with his fingers before he asks a question with a small voice. “can we do this more often?”

“of course,” and now you’re glad for taeyong’s curiosity of your things, presenting you with the opportunity (and excuse) to hold your lover in your arms.

→ YUTA doesn’t care either tbh. he may be one of the ones to figure it out before the others - how? you don’t know either but i have a feeling he might’ve taken a look at your ID or something along those lines. mans just nods at the year. as long as you’re still yourself and don’t change how you act in the relationship obvi bc he’s dating you bc of how you’ve presented yourself so far. it’ll feel weird if you suddenly start to dote on him just because you’re older. still likes to take care of you <3

“hey babe? were you born in 1993?” yuta inquires one day at dinner, the whole table of members somehow going a little quiet at the revelation.

“mhm! how’d you know?” you tilted your head, placing a piece of fish into your mouth and ignoring the shocked faces on the faces of the different members.

“eehh- i just saw it on your ID accidentally the other day,” yuta smiles when wiggle your mouth around to feel for the fish’s bone, finally able to shoot your boyfriend a smile as you both go back to your dinner. your laugh is the one thing that’s heard across the table and the occasional clinks of chopsticks against porcelain, and you’re confident if you were on a sitcom, the camera would just have all the members staring into it in shock.

“is it that surprising?” you asked the members, some of them waving their hands and shaking their head, knowing that yuta would probably take it up to them if they happen to have a problem with it.

“so i actually needed to call you hyung/noona?! i’m so sorry!!!” mark exclaims, earning a giggle from you.

→ DOYOUNG would react a little intensely too, but more in a starstruck, quiet kind of way. he just has this wide eyed look that make you burst out in laughter at the discovery and his lips are making a funny shape. he nods it off calm and cooly, but inside he’s like oh my god wtf really???? why didn’t i know this holy shit are they going to leave me for not knowing you can see no thought behind his eyes but you know the man’s spiralling a little inside that you have to reassure him that it’s just a minor thing (he gets out of the dump pretty quickly). your age reveal doesn’t affect him much either.

“you’re- you’re older than me?” doyoung’s mouth dries, coffee cup hovering just below his lips as you drop the bomb without much care. it’s quiet in the early morning, having had just finished filming his relay cam, but you can practically hear doyoung’s thoughts. he’s brought of it when you place a hand on his wrist.

“babe, baby, it’s okay. i didn’t tell you anyway, don’t worry about it,” your smile is blinding, and it has doyoung smiling as well, agreeing along to your reasoning and slowly easing into his previous action of drinking his beverage before he halts again.

your head tilts in question. “what is it?”

your boyfriend waves it off with a shy smile, bringing your hand to his lips as he lands a kiss on the skin there, “nothing. just thinking about how much i love you.”

“did it change?”

there’s a blush on his cheeks when he says it, glad for the two of you being in the only ones awake. “no, not one bit.”

→ JAEHYUN would one way or another kind of know already, although he’s not 100% sure. he’s observant, sometimes content with watching you take care of the other members (poor guy gets jealous tho) or just cleaning up after him when he’s a little too tired to do things - like wash his hair and what not. even if you’re not a naturally ‘taking care of others’ person, jaehyun picks up on the things that he’s heard his friends talk about regarding their older siblings (since he’s an only child) or compares to how you act around the group that’s similar to taeyong or doyoung. i can see jaehyun being a little disappointed, but it doesn’t change much as long as he can keep the dynamic of the relationship (so him giving the affection with you in his embrace). jaehyun is a quiet kind of shock like doyoung.

“huh… you’re born in 1994?”

“sure am,” you’re filling out a form for a membership, pen scribbling with swiftness in order not to hold up the line. you pass it back in a minute as the cashier processes your membership, and you feel jaehyun squeeze your hand. “why, why? is it an issue?” you mumble a thank you to the cashier, heading out of the store hand in hand while you find a spot to talk to your boyfriend.

“no no,” jaehyun giggles, a low one that makes your heart flutter, and he leans down to place a kiss onto your lips. it lingers there longer than you expected and you feel his smile on your lips. “there’s no issue. it just kinda adds up, in a way. you’re such a natural at giving advice and taking care of the other members. i’m just… a little surprised, is all.”

you laugh at that, meeting his lips again in a loving peck, “okay, that’s good then!”

→ JUNGWOO says “woowww!” like video game commentary and claps. yes he claps, you’re not sure why either but he’s just so thrilled to learn of your birth year that he just nods along and gives you a thumb-up after. i can’t say he’ll be that shocked, more of like happy for you like you just told him you passed a test or something. when you ask him about it, he just shrugs and pats you on the back. it’s all part of his personality, though, and like taeyong/yuta, he wouldn’t care much apart from being able to call you ‘sunbaenim’ as a joke. sometimes calls you senpai LMAO

“woah, you’re older than me by four years?” jungwoo mumbles when you show him your old IDs, the topic of your birth year overriding the original goal of wanting to see your foetus pictures.

“hm? oh yeah, i guess i never really mentioned it, huh?” you continue with what you were doing, cleaning up the stray hairs sticking out from your hairdo before jungwoo comes back hugging with his long limbs and silky outfit.

“congrats!” he meets your eyes through the vanity mirror and proceeds to peck your cheek and your expression that follows next brings laughter to jungwoo’s chest. you can feel it move from behind you, hoping he wouldn’t mess up the hour you spent on your hair. “why congrats?” your lip is curled with a raise of your eyebrows as your boyfriend continues to hang off your shoulders.

he thinks, then replies with a dunno and leaves the area to settle back on the bed. the snap of his camera follows next, no doubt taking pictures of the serious face shots of your old ID cards.

→ MARK would be one of the ones that you think is over exaggerating, except he’s just that shocked. he would stumble over his words and texting johnny or whoever to tell him and be like “yoooo? huh? what?” mark would probably be the last one to make the connection and johnny is all like “yeah? u didn’t know?” and mark is like “HOW WOULD I KNOW THEY LOOK SO YOUNG?????!!” hysterical, this man. mark almost doesn’t believe it for a second and you have to take out your ID to show him lmfao

mark’s head snaps to you once he overhears you in conversation with the flyer distributor, catching your attention with something that was in line with your interests. mark tunes out the promoter explaining the features of the product, only coming back to earth when you mention your date of birth for a trial of their services.

“you’re WHAT? nah. no. no way, show me your ID.”

the other jumps back at the sudden exclamation while you just raise an eyebrow. sorry, excuse him, you mumble, and you’re dragging mark off to the side as you fumble in your bag to pull out your ID in exasperation. the timing is imperfectly perfect: mark bends down to inspect your birth year, you flip open the wallet a little too hard, it hits his head in a loud thwack!

“ow.” mark giggles, squinting his eyes to finally make out the fading ‘1998’ on your card, “oh! so the same as jungwoo hyung?” he giggles again, “he finally as someone to talk to!”

→ HAECHAN is shocked but would immediately mask it and go like “oh my! still so pretty, miss halmeoni,” he coos and you’re so ready to smack him. in a way acts like johnny but will not stop using the word on a daily basis (unless you tell him that you don’t like it). it becomes part of the pet names that he calls you, but he still likes the classic baby/honey/love. sometimes also like to whine with hyung/noona if he wants something, like a new video game or for you to buy food for him. other than that, haechan is pretty indifferent about you being older than him.

“hah?! you’re born in 1999?” haechan has his neck stuck out like a fish out of water, not posing that much difference since he’s just finished a shower. you make the bed with deftness, tucking in the duvet easily as your boyfriend approaches from behind.

he’s shocked, but before you can comment on it, he recovers quickly to deliver a quip through his toothpaste-filled mouth, “oh my! halmeoni, then you should take a seat!” your hands are on your hips, glaring at him while he only grins.

you indulge him, though, and take a seat on the newly made bed, relaxing into the softness of the sheets with elbows.

“if i’m considered elderly, then, you can do the housework for me, right?” the dread that slowly fills up haechan’s features make you explode into giggles, before pushing yourself up to come face to face with him.

“thought so,” you whispered, petting his head as you continue the clean-up of the room.

[supraveng]

Marvelous friends - part 6

Part 5 Series Masterlist Main Masterlist

Summary: Confrontation with Chris after his birthday party

Pairing: eventually Chris Evans x reader

A/N: I know it's short, but I felt like the issue needed to be addressed, and a bit of angst (sorry, not sorry)

Word count: 1187

Warning: use of profanity, angst, self doubt

graphics by @firefly-graphics

You did not sleep well that night, constantly trying to figure out what you did to make Chris change so quickly. He said it was a date, I know I heard him say that, was it because I told him to not spend the whole time with me?  

When your alarm went off Sunday morning, you knew you wanted to lay in bed all day, but that would just make you feel miserable.   So that is how you decided to make yourself miserable in a productive way, you got dressed and decided to go for a jog. 

You hadn’t yet taken a good look at the neighborhood you were spending the summer in, so you figured this would be the best way to find those hidden gems around town that only the locals knew about. 

Almost to your third mile and starting to lose your momentum, your playlist was interrupted by a phone call. Seeing Chris’ name pop up on the id used to make you excited, now it just made you feel inadequate and self conscious.  Deciding to answer his call  was the best way for you to move past this and get over him, right? 

“Hello?” you answered more out of breath than you realized

“Hey, it’s Chris, is this a bad time?” he asked, seeming to not want to talk to you when he was the one who called you, but whatever.

“No, I’m out on a jog and happen to slow down to figure out where I am, so your timing is perfect” responding and trying your best to sound normal

He chuckled at you “alright, well, I didn’t get to say goodbye to you last night and wanted to know if you had time to meet for lunch.  I have a flight out tonight and was hoping we could talk”

Ok, so he does want to see you, and talk….here goes nothing

“Yea, I could do lunch” 

By the time Chris showed up at your door, you were dressed casually and ready to get this conversation over with.  You weren’t sure what to expect, but you knew you didn’t want to drag this out any longer than it had to be, and apparently Chris didn’t either since he had a flight in a few hours. 

Opening the door, Chris looked amazing in a too tight t-shirt and jeans. “Come on in, can I get you something to drink?” you asked, trying to keep your shit together.  

"No, thanks, I'm good" he shook his head 

"So you wanted to talk?" you asked as you took a seat on the couch, Chris following behind and sitting next to you. 

“Yea…. I like you…... more than I anticipated I would, I feel like our conversations over the last few months have been incredible”  You are smiling at him but incredibly confused, so he continued “but after everything last night, I think it’s best we just remain friends.” 

“Uh huh”  the only thing you could think of that happened last night was that he met the waitress, so honestly what more could you say at this point.  “Well, I guess that’s that” you tell him as you start to stand.  “I’m not really in a lunch mood now, so I’ll walk you out” 

“Y/N, come on, I’m not judging you here, I think we can still be friends” he tells you but not moving from his spot on the couch. 

“Judging me?  What...you know what Chris, you just rejected me for someone else and I’m sure she’s great, but as much as I’d like to remain your friend, I’m not in the mood to sit across from you at lunch and hear how great she is.”  

“Someone else?  What are you talking about?” he looked at you completely confused. 

Staring at him, you sighed and walked back toward the couch “the waitress, cute, young, firm, everything I’m not, I get it” 

“Nothing happened with the waitress…..I had a few drinks and maybe flirted with her, but that has nothing to do with this, us” 

“Then what happened last night that brought you to my house today?” you asked him completely dumbfounded as to what this was all about.

“I talked to Tom, he told me about your…...relationship, and like I said, I’m not judging you, but it would be too weird to start a romantic relationship with someone who is 'friends' with my friend”  he seemed uncomfortable but at this point you didn’t care. 

“And what exactly did Tom say? Because he and I have been friends for years and I’ve been friends with Benedict longer and that didn’t seem to bother you” you were getting more agitated at this point. 

“Well, I guess I assumed you weren’t sleeping with your best friends husband, but who knows” he threw his hands up, seeming to be rattled by this conversation, but at this point you were almost speechless. 

“S-sleeping together?  T-tom said we're s-sleeping….together?” you were lost for a moment and started asking questions, mostly to yourself.

“Why would he tell you that? I.. what...why would he say that?”  you sat back on the couch in a daze trying to understand what Chris said and why Tom would say that.  It wasn’t true, and you’ve never known Tom to make up stuff for any reason. 

“Look, I’m not judging you” you looked up when Chris sat next to you and started speaking again. 

“Yea…. thanks Chris” you are eyeing him now because you honestly not sure how this day has turned into this “but I’ve never slept with Tom.  And since you already made up your mind, instead of asking me what’s going on, I’m still gonna pass on that lunch" you snapped beyond irritated.  

“You’ve never slept with Tom?” you shake your head no without looking up at him. “Then why did he tell me that?  He's been my friend for years, why would he lie to me about something like that?” 

You finally look at him and see that he’s not trying to clarify anything, he’s irritated that you are denying it “that’s not something I can answer for you” you shrugged then walked to open the door for him. 

This day had turned upside down and you didn’t have the energy to do any of this. Chris made his way over to you as you opened the door wider “I’m back in a few weeks, maybe we can try this friendship again” he spoke as he walked out the door. 

You looked at him not completely understanding the point now, he didn’t want to pursue a romantic relationship because he thought you were slutting around with his friend but he ‘wasn’t judging’ as he so nicely kept telling you, and he thought you were lying about slutting around with his friend.  Was there really any point in trying to keep a friendship with someone he didn’t trust? 

“Maybe” you try your best to smile at him, but what was the point.  

You spent the rest of the day drinking on your patio, you had papers to grade but not in the right mindset to deal with it.  

Part 7

[jeonqqin]

man up. [m] | pt.4

h. jisung x reader | netflix rom-com au

— ❝Even with classes, annoying brothers, and an unrequited crush, you still figured your first year of college was going pretty well. Until you managed to get your first boyfriend, and suddenly your brother and his stupidly attractive best friend were attached to your hip for the whole damn ride.

or alternatively;

Why did Jisung care about you so much, and had his eyes always been that pretty?❞

WORD COUNT: 5.4k

CONTAINS: brothers best friend au, teen rom-com au, sorta crack fic, love triangle au, college au

WARNING: future smut, language, reader being followed at night, not much, Chan’s sexy ass arms?

A/N: the big day!! also there’s a little scene for binnie’s birthday (even though it was yesterday)

▸ request

CHAPTERS:  01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 +

blog masterlist | ⟲ fic song

© jeonqqin 2020

—UNEDITED

Your mind was running circles around you, everything a blur.

Talking on the phone with Chan lifted your mood exponentially, but there was still something that ticked in the back of your head. With the way your conversation with Chan ended, you weren’t sure if you should’ve been jumping for joy or hiding away under your covers in hopes that no one would ever find you again.

“So, I was wondering,” His voice drawled over the phone.

You held back the urge to shiver in order to hear exactly what he had to say. Granted the wind had stopped, but the night air was slipping through the thin fabric of your clothes and making up for its absence.

“Yeah?”

You heard Chan chuckle—surprisingly enough it sounded nervous.

“Would you ever date a guy like me?”

And just with one question, you almost fell forward off of the swing.

“What are you saying?” You uttered, eyes staring out at the bright red slide in front of you that had been dulled by the darkness.

Chan cleared his throat, “Do you want to go on a date with me, Y/n?”

You had said yes too quickly, not just in the sense that it was embarrassing, but also because after you hung up, it really occurred to you that you would be going on a date with Bang Chan.

A date.

Had you even been on a date before?

You wrapped your arms around your body as you contemplated the whole situation. It was dark outside despite the street lights, and even then, they were too dim to really be doing their job. But you hardly noticed, too immersed in your own head to worry about the dark or the possibility of meat-heads roaming around looking for their next meal.

Your skin prickled, your subconscious attempting to warn you about the shadow that lurked only a few feet away.

The date. It should be easy; smile, talk to him without vomiting, and be sure not to make a complete fool of yourself in front of the single most attractive man you had ever seen. Piece of cake.

You mentally cursed Minho for possibly scaring you for the rest of your young life. Could you hold it over him if his years of desensitizing you turned you into a lonely cat-lady?

No—he’d already taken that title, and you weren’t sure if the universe was ready to support two financial tragedies within the same family.

The sound of footsteps fell to deaf ears, the lights of the dorms were able to be seen from your place on the street, and there wasn’t a shred of dread in your naive body. Not even when the sound of sneakers padding against tar got closer—too close for comfort had you been paying any attention. Maybe you were too tired, or your head was too preoccupied to focus on the approaching body behind you.

Not until there was a hand wrapping around your mouth and another pinning your arms to your sides. In your shock, you could feel the flex of your aggressor’s biceps—he was strong, and it had your heart stopping in your chest.

You wiggled the best you could in his grip, but the man’s hold was too constricting, and you suddenly wanted to cry. How stupid could you have been to let something like this happen?

Your heart pounded in your chest as you plead against the calloused hand, your legs shaking like jelly. He leaned closer, his lips brushing your ear—mint, the one thing you could focus on was that his breath didn’t reek of alcohol like you would’ve assumed.

“Wow…” He released a breath with a small chuckle, and your brows furrowed.

The voice was familiar—

“You really are stupid. Do you realize that you would’ve been so dead if I wanted to like—take advantage of you and dump your body in a river, or something?”

You squirmed out of the stupid stupid strong arms of your stupid stupid ex-friend, you eyes set in a harsh glare as you brought your fists down on his firm chest.

“You fucking pig!” You screeched with rage, fists clenched even when he grabbed your wrists in between fits of laughter. You actually wanted to stab a knife into his eye. “I can’t believe you did that! I thought I was going to die, asshole!”

Changbin snickered with a mocking coo, “I know. Poor baby...”

“You’re a sadistic bastard.”

“Just think—” he released your hands, only to block the oncoming smack that you sent. “You won’t make this mistake again, stupid-head.”

You huffed, wrapping your arms around your body again and continuing forward, your pulse more intense than it had been before. “What if I had gone into cardiac arrest or something? You would’ve been fucked in more ways than one. Do you know what they do to rapists in prison?”

“Y/n,” Changbin chuckled under his breath, meeting your stride easily. “I didn’t rape you, in case you didn’t notice.”

“But if I died, that’s what it would’ve looked like! And suddenly you’re in concrete hell.”

Changbin shook his head. “God—just be more careful next time you decide to walk alone in the middle of the night. Call one of us or something.”

Guilt nawed at your skin, and you sent him a sulky pout. He was right. If something really had happened, you would’ve been fucked. Unless the guy was thinner than a twig and had a shit center of gravity, your chances of getting out of that kind of danger was unlikely. Damn Changbin and his infuriatingly true points.

You let out a groan as the boy beside you casually slung his arm around your shoulders.

“Fine. You’re right. Happy?”

Changbin’s head turned to you and he released another coo, his forehead pressing against yours and successfully annoying the shit out of you. How everyone else dealt with him was a true mystery.

He was supposed to be older than you?

The pitch of his voice raised, “Of course I am.”

You wrenched out of his grip, swatting away his reaching hand and stepping out of his range.

Perhaps there would be a murder tonight.

“Stop being a creep and act like a normal person for once, Bin.”

Without even looking back, you could feel the pout on his lips. But he only let out a quick whine before following after you, his hands stuffed into his jeans.

You had hardly noticed before, but he was dressed strangely—he was in a torn to shit grey t-shirt, multiple splotches of something black plastered across his torso just above the ragged seam of where the shirt ended, holes scattered everywhere exposing glimpses of his firm chest. The jeans weren’t any better, almost completely colored black by the same substance on his shirt, baring rips at the knees and not the ones you get solely for fashion.

“By the way…” You drawled, twisting around to rake your eyes over him one last time. “What were you even doing before this?”

Changbin glanced at his attire and shrugged, the smallest glow of red covering his ears. “I’ve been working on cars for some extra money.”

Your eyebrow raised. “At night?”

“It’s the only time I have free between producing new songs and school.”

Nodding you faced back towards the dark street in front of you.

Changbin had never sparked you as a manual labor kind of guy, let alone someone who could fix cars and get paid for doing it. But after taking a moment to think about it, it made sense. He fit the scene, so to say, and it somehow added to the edgy look he already had going on for him.

You didn’t know as much about your friends as you probably should’ve.

“So you guys actually got the recording room done? Are you and Chan using it now?” You asked nonchalantly, a terrible attempt to slide Chan into the conversation. Changbin must’ve known a few things about Chan that could help you quench your nerves for the upcoming date.

Changbin sent you a sideways look, letting you know that you weren’t as slick as you thought you were.

“Ah, Chan…” He hummed, the two of you finally getting close enough to the university to discern the different buildings. “What’s up with you two?” He asked hesitantly, a hint of a frown on his brow.

“Well—I mean, I like him a lot.” You fumbled for the right words, though you knew that Changbin wasn’t one to rush you. As annoying as he could be, he was a good listener. “And he just asked me out—”

“He did?”

Well, you thought he was a good listeners

“Yeah,” you shrugged. “Earlier he asked if I wanted to go out on a date or something—”

“Or something?”

You shoved him to the side, though his heavy body barely moved an inch.

“Would you stop interrupting me? I’m serious.” You huffed, frustrated.

“I am too.”

You froze—huh?

Your eyes searched his for a moment, his words not as comforting as you wanted them to be, instead his questioning only made your stomach twist in more knots than they had been in before. You really didn’t know anything about Chan, and talking to someone who did only made you hesitant about continuing with this first date of yours.

Sure, you weren’t one to believe rumors about people you barely knew—but it was the fact that you barely knew Chan that made you so nervous.

“Well I’m a little surprised that Chan asked you out.”

You frowned. “Why?”

“Uh…” Changbin paused, searching for his next words carefully with a contemplative hum. “It’s nothing bad. I mean, Chan’s one of the best people I know.”

“But…?”

He stopped to wait for you to run your student ID along the sensor, listening to the automatic click of the door and using it as a stall for time. He was trying to find the right way to word what he wanted to say. He didn’t want to blindside you, nor did he want to sabotage his friend by telling you something that might steer you away.

He waited for you to take a step inside the dorms before continuing with a hushed voice.

“Chan is… very selfless let’s say. He doesn’t really take the time to date per se. He’s work oriented. Not to say he hasn’t had girlfriends before, but they never really—”

“Became anything?”

That was what you had been contemplating. If the date went wrong, could you talk to Chan afterwards? Would he still be that person you could call if you wanted to step away from the world? You couldn’t find yourself feeling upset if that happened to be the outcome.

But with the small look of suspicion that Changbin sent, his brow curling upwards, you quickly backpedaled.

“He mentioned something about it while we were on the phone.” You rushed to save yourself.

Taking your answer without question, he stopped. You were both standing outside of your room, the quiet hallway encasing the both of you and chilling you to the bone more than the night air had. Changbin bit his tongue.

“Chan is an amazing friend. But I’ve never really seen him as a boyfriend before.” He sighed, scratching his cheek. “And as much of a little shit you are… I care about you enough to want you to be happy.”

“Is this you warning me?”

“No.” His mouth formed a thin line, he really had no idea how to word anything. It was beginning to frustrate him. “Just be aware that he isn’t the most observant guy when it comes to himself, so be patient with the guy.”

Okay, that helped you none whatsoever.

You sighed, pushing your dorm door open and nodding finally for Changbin.

“Well, thank you, Bin. For walking me and all that…”

Your gratitude was pitiful, but Changbin smiled wide nonetheless, glad that he could help you out despite his advice being absolutely terrible.

“Anytime, Y/n.” He ruffled your hair before you could stop him. “But next time, call me before you decide to be stupid and walk alone agian, okay?”

You smiled.

“Yeah. I promise, Bin. Thanks—seriously.”

As you closed the door, you missed the way Changbin’s lip quirked, his ears once again shining a red in the dim lighting of the hallway. He chuckled, shaking his head.

He wished both Chan and Jisung luck—you really were a handful.

“So this is a date?”

You had absolutely no idea what to say, your nervous gaze on the road in front of you as Chan glanced over at you from his place behind the wheel of his beloved Subaru Crosstrek—he had gone on a cute spiel about how he managed to scrounge up enough money from producing his tracks to afford the down payment on the car. It was cute only because he giggled every time he mentioned some miniscule detail that wasn’t necessary for the development of the story.

He always apologized when he got off track, but those were your favorite parts.

And you still had no idea what to say.

“Yeah, Y/n. A date. Have you ever been on one of those before?” He joked, taking another turn into yet another neighborhood.

He had to have gone down at least four streets already—

“Does a slow dance at a mediocre prom count?”

“A what?”

You snorted, feeling the telltale heat of your cheeks reddening. You were such a loser, the best you could do was tell him about your failed relationships?

“I mean, Jung Wooyoung was pretty hot, so I guess it could count. Granted, Minho stepped in before he could kiss me at the end of the song.”

“You’re kidding.” He looked close to ripping his cheeks with how wide his smile was stretching.

His eyes flickered to you and a shiver ran down your spine at the way he took one hand off the wheel and leaned against the center console. You were either terrified of him crashing or really turned on by the way his biceps bulged at the movement.

You cleared your throat, “Minho was always really adamant about keeping me away from all the funny business.”

“You’re kidding.”

“Unfortunately not. My brother sucks.”

Chan burst out laughing. “That’s why he pulled that, ‘what are your intentions with my baby sister’ act?”

“He didn’t.”

“He did. But he backed off so quickly, I was convinced that it was a joke.”

You nearly choked, your eyes widening as you suddenly threw yourself around to look at him, unable to feel surprised at the way he was already looking at you with a charming smile.

“He did what?”

“Yeah,” Chan shrugged, shifting back to look at the road. “I asked him why it mattered and he just kind of backed off.”

That was right—Minho was scared of Chan.

You would never forget that fun fact for as long as you lived, and it was all thanks to Bang Chan. It really had you rethinking the whole reason why you were nervous in the first place. Chan was the only person in your life that had managed to get rid of stress rather than add to it, and you were obviously worried over nothing. Chan was amazing.

And you were crazy.

You laughed, catching Chan’s attention, his eyes flickering between your eyes and lips without you noticing. How you had managed to have him whipped within a matter of days was a complete mystery to him. But there he was, staring at your lips and risking his damn life while doing so. Chan was hopeful, he wanted things to go well this time, and he was going to do everything he could to make sure of that.

“Where are you taking me, you maniac?” You giggled in exasperation as he took yet another turn into a neighborhood, house stacked upon house.

Sure, it was nice to drive around with him, but you were beginning to get antsy. Even more so as Chan continued to look over at you and smirk, his smile as infuriating as it was attractive.

“We’re almost there, hold on.”

“That doesn’t tell me where—”

Turning down a dead-end, Chan lifted his hand to your mouth with an emphasized “shhh”.

Maybe he was a maniac and he was planning on killing you as soon as you reached the end of the street. You definitely wouldn’t be able to find your way back to the main road if he tried, so it was definitely a possibility.

“Don’t worry about it.” He hushed.

With a small scoff, you puckered your lips in a pout and they briefly brushed against the palm of his hand. With the action, your eyes widened as his head snapped your direction. Immediately, your lips pulled into a tight line, your stomach tying up in knots as he dropped his hand and let it fall to your thigh, causing your whole body to go ridged. What was wrong with you?

Chan chuckled, patting your thigh in an attempt to dissolve your tenseness, but it only proved to make your clothes feel much tighter than they had been before. You were physically going to melt into the seat with how hot you were getting, and you sure as hell hoped you weren’t sweating as much as you thought you were.

But the feeling of his hand wasn’t unpleasant—it was warm, but not so much that it was uncomfortable, which was surprising considering how your skin was close to melting off the bone. It simply rested there, occasionally he drummed a nonexistent beat against it with his first two fingers, though you suspected that he hadn’t even noticed that he had been doing that.

Without you realizing, he pulled the car into park, his eyes amused as he watched you stare at his hand for a little longer.

Something else—you definitely were.

“We’re here.” Chan said, lifting his hand away from your thigh to pull the key from the ignition.

You weren’t upset that he had moved his hand, but you couldn’t deny that disappointment had started to bubble up.

Looking out your window, you noticed that you were, in fact, at the end of the dead-end road. But instead of a dense thicket of trees or a mountain of concrete blocking it off, there sat a decrepit and grey building. The maroon of the bricks had been worn and chipped, and the large barn looking doors were rusted and close to falling off their hinges. You can tell that it had once been beautiful with the large stone bird watching over on a centered pedestal.

Chan opened his door to get out and you followed, despite how strange it might’ve been that he took you to an abandoned building in the middle of nowhere.

“What is this?” You asked, almost shell shocked at the sheer size of the building as you both stepped closer.

“It’s an old fire station.”

Old didn’t do the place justice—every new fire station you had seen was pristine and white, large open door garages lining the first floor. The one in front of you was nothing like the ones in town.

“I used to live in this neighborhood before I moved to Sydney. I was very young and don’t really remember much about it, but I do remember this place.” He smiled, looking up at the two storied building. “When I came back I never expected it to be still standing after fifteen years. I thought the two would’ve torn it down and built a convenience store there or something, but nope, it’s still here.”

It was nice to see his face light up while talking about something he cared about. It was endearing.

He then grabbed your hand with a small wink and dragged you forward, though you didn’t put up much of a fight at all. Every part of you screamed about how nice his hand felt around yours, how his palms weren’t too calloused to be rough but enough to want them all over the rest of your body. His pale skin pretty with the contrast of his raised veins. Veiny hands were nice… You really were just reverting back to your horny high school self, weren’t you?

You cleared your throat.

“But why did you bring me here?” You questioned, looking warily at the back of his head.

You weren’t scared, but you were almost certain that a building that was decades old wasn’t a normal date site.

“Why not?” Chan shrugged, hoping to god that you couldn’t see just how terrified he was.

“Maybe because I was expecting to go watch a movie or go to a restaurant?”

He glanced back with a raised brow. “Do you want to do those things?”

“I’d rather chew off my foot,” you admitted, catching him off guard for a moment. “But I’m trying to make you feel like the weird one here.”

Weird one indeed. He had spent the entire night before without sleep, not coming up with a new track, but thinking of where exactly to bring you. He contemplated how to explain to you the reason why he was so exhausted and jittery was because he didn’t want you to leave the date thinking that he was some average guy. Chan didn’t want you to think he was boring. So he could be weird if it meant you wanted to see him again.

You shared a smile, both of your nerves fading away with each passing second. Of course, Chan had nothing to worry about.

He proceeded to pull you through the old rickety door of the station, completely ignoring the way the visible slivers of his chest flexed when he tugged the door open with one good yank. Now that you were actually thinking about it, his outfit was one of the best you’d seen him in; a simple black muscle tee topped with a heavy denim jacket, and his jeans whitewashed and ripped.

It was simple but effective considering you couldn’t keep your eyes off the strips of flesh that peaked behind his jacket. If only the autumn breeze had taken a day off.

The further the two of you got into the building, the more excited Chan looked. His eyes lit up and there was suddenly a bounce in his step. Not to mention the way his grip on your hand tightened to the point where he was nearly cutting off the circulation. But it was nice nonetheless. You didn’t have the heart to be upset with him.

Your eyes flew around to all the different old contraptions that must’ve been shiny in their prime. With torn hoses all over the place, and precariously placed pipes, you had no idea whether to be amazed that they hadn’t succumbed to the elements or terrified that if you took one wrong step you would fall and get impaled.

Looking over at Chan, you giggled as he began to unravel a wound up hose, momentarily releasing your hand to act like a complete child.

“So what was your plan when we got here? Get me in a secluded place so you could tie me up and kill me?” You teased, offering him a smile.

Chan wanted to do two of those three things—that was for sure.

“What? You don’t want to explore this magnificent building with me?” He asked despite himself.

“So you didn’t plan some elaborate picnic with candles and fancy homemade French food?”

Chan paused for a moment, lips fighting a smile. You had built up quite the impression on him from the very moment you two met. The hours of preparation was for naught, and Chan could care less.

He hummed, “Well if you mean a blanket on the floor and take-out, then yeah. No candles though. I have a bad feeling that if we were to light any fire within ten miles of this place it would turn to dust. Which would be pretty ironic considering it is a fire station—”

“Are you rambling?”

Chan froze, mouth open to deny your question, but found that it wasn’t completely false and shut it.

“...it’s probably cold too.” He added lastly.

You smiled.

“Sounds good to me.”

You then proceeded to struggle your way up a flight of unstable spiral stairs with Chan close behind—so close that his arms were almost completely around you. He assured you that it was only so he wouldn’t be at fault if you fell. But it felt nice whenever his chest brushed lightly against your back, so you let his lame excuse slide.

The food was, in fact, cold. But it was still good since you really couldn’t go wrong with traditional Korean food.

And so the rest of the evening played out, the two of you sharing pleasantries and learning about one another, with many cracked jokes about your brother and his friends, only strategically avoiding Jisung all together.

Chan went on about his story, how he had two younger siblings back in Australia and a set of loving parents that believed in each and every one of his dreams as he grew up, and supported his pursuit of becoming a producer. You bit your tongue, keeping your questions of “do you miss them?” and “do you still see them?” to yourself. Still, Chan seemed happy enough, you thought. Considering you would be miserable if you had to spend your time with someone who complained and sulked the whole time. You were glad he could talk about his family without falling into a pit of missing them.

That date was pretty perfect, despite its oddities.

Who knew someone could be a by-the-book romantic and an original dork at the same time?

Your own thoughts had you chuckling into your water, almost making you cough, but thankfully Chan hadn’t noticed, his attention too zeroed in on all the food in front of him.

“Oh shit—I forgot all about that thing!” He suddenly exclaimed, his eyes locked on a rusty fireman’s pole that ran up into a hole in the floor. Chan hadn’t even finished his (second) bowl of food when he jumped up and ran up to the death trap. The thing didn’t even have any padding at the bottom to protect someone from breaking their legs, and he was excited about that?

Suddenly, you let out a laugh—it was the kind that comes out unexpectedly and makes a loud, unattractive noise and it surprised you both. Your hand clamped down over your mouth on impulse before your shocked expression broke, a swarm of giggles leaving your covered lips and forcing a pink tinge over your cheeks. Chan could only stare at you in awe, trying to think of everything else that could beat your laugh in the most beautiful sound he had ever heard, but he came up blank.

“Come down the pole with me.”

His words had you freezing mid-laugh, eyes wide.

“What? No way am I doing that. What if I get pole burn?”

“Here,” Chan threw his jacket over your shoulders, surprising you with the flood of warmth cascading around you. “Now you can’t get pole burn.”

You pushed your arms through the arms of the jacket, silently relishing in the warm weight.

“Ah, look at you Romeo. I see that you’re trying to make up for all the years I missed going on dates. How romantic.”

“I try.”

With a wink, he was grabbing onto the pole all of a sudden and wrapping his legs around it. You barely had time to stare at the image of his thick biceps curling around the pole before he was descending down it with a laugh of his own. You leaned forward to watch him hit the floor, his knees bending to absorb the impact. He smiled up at you, the sight blinding.

“Your turn!”

“Did I ever mention that I’m kind of allergic to bad ideas?”

Chan snickered, leaning his hands on the pole and shaking it to show you just how “sturdy” the thing was. The wiggle and creak didn’t set you at ease, that was for sure.

“Oh, come on, Y/n. You just watched me do it!” Was his genius response.

The night was beginning to just become you counting how many times Chan said or did something that made you think he was a child.

“Okay, I just don’t understand why you want me to go down this damn pole! Is it some right of passage or something? Do you only go out with the girls who have the balls to do something this stupid?”

“Slide down here and find out.”

He got you there. You really did want to find out.

So you bit the inside of your cheek and wrapped your shaky hands around the rust crusted pole. How Chan managed to do so so easily without sleeves was baffling and a little sexy for whatever stupid reason. You had a thick layer of denim protecting you, and you still felt like you were going to be filleted open.

“Don’t think about it,” he encouraged with a soft voice. “Just jump. I’ve got you.”

And at the words of a poet, you squeezed your eyes shut and held your breath, taking a step off the wooden floor and letting gravity pull you down. You could hear the rust tug and catch on the fabric of Chan’s jacket, but only for a second, because it only lasted a second before you felt hands grab your sides and pillow your impact. A surge of adrenaline had you breathing heavy as Chan cheered lightly in your ear.

“There. You did it.” He poked your forehead with a chuckle, getting you to open your blown eyes. “You have successfully completed the initiation.”

Your heart felt heavy and beat hard against your ribs as he straightened you out, hands finding purchase in his jacket. Subtly he was admiring how you looked in his clothes, but he would never admit that sappy fact to anyone.

You smiled; admittedly shakily. “Ah, yes. Validation. My favorite.”

Chan admired how you could keep releasing quips despite your fear. You weren’t one to be deterred, that was for sure.

“You have an unlimited supply of sarcasm in you, huh?”

“I don’t know. It hasn’t run out yet.”

He smiled and you smiled, it was a good moment—the best of the day. A moment where you were glad you listened to him and literally took the leap. Ready to take another one, your eyes dropped to his lips and his dropped to yours.

And he finally leaned forward, pressing his lips to yours.

You weren’t completely caught off guard, but you definitely were. His hand that wasn’t preoccupied with fiddling with your fingers found your face, palm cupping your jaw and urging your head to tilt to meet his kiss better. It was gentle, as you had expected from Chan, and you were thankful for that.

His lips were softer than you expected and you prayed that the hand that held your cheek wouldn't be able to feel the way your face was burning. The way he intertwined your fingers was more intimate than the kiss itself and you couldn’t help but feel yourself getting light-headed. You lost yourself to the way your shared breaths echoed around the large room every time your lips separated only to reconnect again immediately.

Your first kiss—well, your first real kiss. Surely that one you had shared with Kang Chanhee back in your first year of high school didn’t count. You had only gotten away with it since Minho was home sick that day, anyway.

It was much warmer than your last kiss, that was for sure. His jacket kept you shielded from the cold air and his body secreted a natural heat that had you pressing closer, which in turn sent him a signal to push forward as well.

Suddenly, his teeth bit down on the sensitive flesh of your lip, pulling a taut gasp from your throat.

The noise had Chan withholding a groan, pushing him to break the passionate exchange, his hazy eyes meeting your wide ones.

“What’s wrong?” You asked, voice small and unsure.

He could see the way your lips shined with not only your spit but his own. In some sick and twisted way, he was pleased to see the redness that the kiss brought to your puckered lips. It was satisfying. It was a sort of claim, and he was proud to hold it.

"Nothing. Just admiring my work." He grinned.

You hardly had time to register his words when the hand wrapped around yours was used to yank you forward, Chan’s mouth finding yours once again in a quick peck, leaving you just about a hundred degrees warmer than you originally felt.

[heywardsarchive]

Home [Harry Potter]

Requests closed! Based on this request by nonnie : id like to request a harry x gryffindor reader. its the yule ball and harry wants to ask y/n. but the other boys are all over her and he barely gets a chance. so basically y/n is cho but she says yes XD

Summary: Harry recalls a time when he wanted to ask y/n to the ball but couldn't gather the courage to ask her out.

Pairing: dad!Harry Potter x female reader

A/n: I think this is my favourite Harry fic I've written! Im a sucker for dad!Harry, basically any Harry. I just love that man.

Warnings: none, just pure fluff

Word count: 1.9k words

Memories are in italics

******

It was bedtime on a snowy January night in the Potter household as Harry Potter tucked his oldest into bed. James, only eight years old, was an energetic young boy. He wasn't ready to sleep yet and he was determined to stay up. The only way he could do so was if his father told him a bedtime story.

"Daddy," he started pulling his dad's sleeve, "tell me a bedtime story."

Harry looked down at his son who was trying to look as innocent as possible. "James, it's time for bed."

"Please daddy!" He gave his best puppy dog expression, his eyes the same as the woman harry loved most, and Harry melted. Both mother and son knew how to use their eyes to their advantage.

"Alright fine, call Albus and Lily and I will tell you a bedtime story."

James excitedly jumped out of bed and brought his siblings into his bedroom.

"Alright kids, what bedtime story do you want to hear?" Harry sat down on the bed beside the three children. "Tell us about the first time you had a date with mummy!" Albus said and lily and James nodded in enthusiasm.

"Alright then. So the first time we went on a date was when we were in our fourth year in Hogwarts. Remember the time I told you about the wizard tournament I was in?..."

The triwizard tournament, a disaster for Harry. He had unwillingly got thrown into a game he wanted no part of. He managed to complete the first task but the hardest part was yet to start. He needed to find a date for the Yule ball. In his opinion fighting a dragon was easier than asking a girl out.

He knew who he wanted to take but he was yet to gather the guts to ask her. He saw her multiple times over the week but everytime there was a distraction. Whether it was her friends pulling her away or a teacher snapping at him to pay attention. Harry was unable to get to her.

Ron too was struggling, unable to find a date. "Mate, you fought a dragon if you can't get a date nobody can." He told him as they walked through the courtyard of Hogwarts. "Right now, I think I'd take the dragon." Harry sighed. Ron patted his back. Harry's eyes drifted toward the crowd of students, his gaze stopping on her. Y/n l/n, she was the nicest girl in Hogwarts and everyone was her friend. She and Harry were acquaintances, they weren't close per se. Harry had been crushing on her since the end of third year when she helped him in potions.

Harry, Ron and Hermione were sitting on a table doing potions work while everyone around them were talking about their dates to the ball. A boy sitting to Harry's right was whispering to his friend. Harry tried not to listen but potions was boring and he heard y/n's name and his ears perked up.

"Have you heard? David Arden asked y/n to the ball. She turned him down , do you think I have a chance?" He asked hopefully. The boy beside him, the friend he was talking to, scoffed. "She turned down David Arden, he's literally every girl's crush. What makes you think you have a chance? Besides she's turned down all the 5 guys who asked her out this week."

Harry returned to his work. 5 guys asked her out and she turned all of them down? What chance do I have now. He thought to himself. "Ron, do you think y/n will go with me to the ball?" He shook his best friend's shoulder. "You're the boy who lived mate, she'd definitely agree."

"She's turned down 5 boys this week ron! What if she turns me down too." Harry sighed. "You will never know if you don't try." Ron shrugged.

Harry made up his mind he was going to ask her out that evening.

"Did you do it daddy? Did you ask her to the ball?" Little Lily asked excitedly. Albus shushed his sister. "Let daddy finish!" Harry chuckled and continued. "As I was saying..."

Harry kept avoiding the fact that he had to ask y/n to the ball. He made excuses to do it later but the more he delayed it the higher the chance of him not getting to go with her higher.

As he returned from the great hall after dinner, he ran into y/n. The person he wanted to speak to. "Im so sorry, I wasn't looking where I was going." She apologized. "Don't worry about it, I wasn't looking either." Harry chuckled awkwardly.

"I'll be going then." She smiled, but hesitated a bit. "Hey Harry-" "y/n-" they started at the same time. They laughed. "You go first." She said.

"Uh sure, I uh wanted to ask you if you uh wanted to um gototheballwithme." He stuttered.

"Im sorry, what did you say?"

"Do you want to go to the ball with me?" He said, slowly this time.

"What did she say?? Did she say yes daddy? Did she??" Albus asked this time. "Ofcourse she said yes dummy, they're married!" James said to his brother.

Y/n bit back a smile. "Yes, I'd love to."

Harry felt a blush creep up his neck. "Uh great, that's amazing. Uh what did you want to ask me?"

"I wanted to ask you if you wanted to go with me but I guess you beat me to it." She smiled shyly. "I'll be going then, see you soon Harry." She kissed his cheek and walked to her common room.

Harry stood glued to the spot with his hand on his cheek a smile on his face. "You good mate?" Rons voice startled him, snapping him out of his trance. "Im brilliant, never better. I asked y/n to the ball and she said yes! Ron she said yes!" "Good job man, I knew you could do it!" Ron pat his best friend's back.

That night Harry fell asleep with a smile on his face.

"How was the ball dad? Did you have fun?" James asked curiously.

"Oh yes, we had the time of our life."

The day of the ball couldn't come faster. Harry's excitement was uncontrollable. He kept practicing his dance steps and talked to himself in the mirror causing Ron to shake his head and pass comments about Harry being 'whipped'. He didn't mind though, he was whipped.

Finally the day was here. Harry stood at the bottom of the staircase and waited for his date to arrive. He looked around the hall, it was decorated with Christmas decor, snow was charmed to fall, there were icicles on the ceiling and everyone was dressed up in beautiful attire.

As Harry was looking around, he felt a tap on his shoulder. "Hello Harry." It was y/n. She looked absolutely stunning in her dress. Harry forgot how to speak.

"Did you actually forgot how to speak daddy?" Giggled Lily. "It's a saying lils." James explained to his sister.

"You look beautiful." He finally got out. "Thankyou haz, you look dashing yourself." She poked his chest playfully. Harry blushed at the nickname.

"Potter! There you are. We are waiting for the champions. You dance first." Professor McGonagall said. "Wh-what?" Harry stuttered.

"Yes! Now go on we don't have all night." She hurried both the teens.

"I really can't dance, I'm going to make a fool of myself." Harry whispered to y/n. "It's alright, just follow my lead." Harry nodded in relief.

As the champions entered the hall, Harry's grip on y/n:s hand tightened. She squeezed back to comfort him. Everyone's eyes were on them and Harry was feeling self conscious. They stood on stage and Harry placed his hands on y/n's waist and she on his shoulders. "It'll be fine." She mouthed. Harry nodded. His hands were getting clammy and his mouth dried.

The music started playing and all the champions started to waltz to the sweet melody. Both if them swayed to the music and Harry spun her around. He was starting to enjoy it. At last the dance floor was open to all. The attention was off Harry and he felt much better.

Y/n pulled Harry's hands to a more open space on the dance floor and started dancing to the upbeat song. "Dance with me!" She laughed. Harry looked at her and smiled. They both danced badly at the songs, having the time of their life.

Soon they left the dance floor to go and have some refreshments. "You know, I thought you'd turn me down." Harry said sheepishly. "Why would you think that?" Y/n asked curiously. "Because I heard you turned down 5 boys in the same week and I thought you'd turn me down too." "I turned down the other boys because I wanted to go with you." She placed a hand on his cheek.

"I really like you y/n. Im glad we came together." Harry whispered, his face moving closer to hers, staring into her eyes. "I really like you too haz. Alot." She closed the gap between them.

It was blissful. Harry didn't feel the butterflies that others say happen on your first kiss, it felt like coming home, it felt right. It was perfect. When they pulled away Harry realised that he had found the one he wanted to be with forever.

"Would you like to be my girlfriend?" Harry asked her. "Definitely." Y/n said kissing him once again.

"Ewww." Gagged all the children when Harry mentioned that they kissed. "Daddy has the cooties." Albus said in disgust. "I think it's cute." James said proudly. Harry laughed and ruffled his hair.

"What's going on here?" Y/n entered the room. "Daddy was telling us about the Yule ball!" Lily exclaimed. "Was he now?" Y/n said smiling at her family. "It truly was a great experience. Maybe when you go to Hogwarts you'll have one too!"

"Alright it's time for bed now. Let's get you tucked in." Harry clapped his hands. James settled himself on the bed and Harry kissed his forehead and shit the door. He tucked Albus while y/n tucked lily.

Shutting the door, Harry pulled his wife toward him. "I love you. You've given me three lovely children and the best life I could ever imagine. You stood by md through everything. I don't deserve you." He kissed her forehead.

"Oh haz, you have gone through so much you deserve everything and more and you make me the happiest woman alive. I love you so much." She kissed his lips.

Just like the day of the yule ball, this kiss felt right. Harry was home and he never wanted to leave.

*****

[jihyuncompass]

Unexpected Changes

It’s time for a very special fic for a very special boy who lives in my head and my heart. Happy birthday Shawty I love you <3

I want to give a very very special thanks to my wonderful friend @otherlandshark​ for giving me this idea, your mind never ceases to amaze me and I love you so very much. 

I would also love to give thanks to everyone who has encouraged me or helped me with this fic. There’s several of you, some of which aren’t on here. But thank you all, from the bottom of my heart. 

Summary: You decide to surprise Shaw for his birthday, but some unexpected events get in the way. 

Shaw x MC

Word Count: 4.1k

Warnings: Some cursing, adult jokes. 

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Leaning forward you squinted at the calendar in front of you checking it, you confirmed the date, June 21st. The date was circled in a red pen, the little box for the date had Shaw’s B-day!!!!! Written in the same red felt pen. You smiled to yourself as you reached out to your phone left face down on the table beside you. 

You’d half expected a text from Shaw already, after all he usually was the one to text you first. Yet when you checked your notifications you didn’t see anything from him. You sat down at the kitchen table, considering if you should text him first, maybe he was sleeping in today, his finals should be done by now so maybe he was taking a day to rest. Even if that didn’t really sound like Shaw’s style. 

As it turns out, you didn’t have to wait too long to decide if you should text him or not. Your phone screen lit up with a text message, the contact image of a young lavender haired man. 

Shaw: Do you remember what today is?

MC: Oh I know this one!

MC: It’s monday!

Shaw:....

Shaw: Care to try again? 

MC: Ah fine, it’s the 21st of June!

Shaw: You’re not wrong, but do you know what else it is? 

MC: Hmmmmm 

Shaw: Hm?

You knew very well that Shaw’s birthday was today, but still you wanted to tease him a little bit. Maybe just to get back at him a little bit for his usual rounds of teasing you. 

MC: Maybe you should remind me what today is, since it seems I don’t know

Shaw: Or, how about we meet up? 

Shaw: With my finals I’ve haven't had the time to entertain you 

MC: Oh today? I’m not sure if I have the time…

Shaw: You can’t be that busy can you? 

MC: Shaw it’s Monday! I have a job you know 

MC: Buuuuut 

MC: It is a bit slow today, perhaps I could take the day off. 

Shaw: Meet me at the park.  Don’t be late. 

MC: Hey!!! I should be telling YOU that!!!! 

Putting your phone back down on the table you quickly rose from your seat. You had preemptively taken the day off, preparing for today weeks ago. Today was not only his birthday, but also right after his final exams for school. Both events in your eyes were worthy of a celebration. 

First, you got yourself dressed and ready, putting on the carefully chosen ensemble, an outfit more in line with Shaw’s personal style than your own, but one you knew he’d appreciate seeing you in. 

You pulled out the large picnic basket from your closet, putting it down on the table while you opened your fridge door to grab the neatly packaged and wrapped food you’d spent the night before putting together. Once you finished your personal game of picnic basket tetris you carefully snuck in a picnic blanket on top. 

The last step was the gift wrapped box sitting on the other side of your dining table, the gift was wrapped with the shark wrapping paper you’d special ordered on a whim the week beforehand. You slipped the box into your bag, trying to keep it at least a little bit hidden from view. You slipped on your shoes as you held your bag in one arm and the picnic basket in the crook of your elbow. 

The bright blue sky was the first thing you noticed when you stepped outside. The warm new summer air swaying the newly bloomed flowers on your path. The summer breeze was just warm enough that you felt a bead of sweat appear on your brow as you walked to the park you had arranged to meet at. 

Since the weather was so warm for the first time in what seemed like forever it looked like everyone in the city was outside today. Families walked into ice cream shops, groups of friends wandered into stores and restaurants. Couples holding hands walking down the sidewalk hand in hand. 

The park wasn’t any less busy, it took several rounds walking along the park to find the perfect spot to get yourself set up, after walking the perimeter for a while you found a good spot you could get yourself situated. 

Your phone rang just as you finished pulling out the last items from your picnic basket. Once the items were set down you reached out and quickly answered your phone without even really checking the caller ID. 

“Hello?”

“I’m almost there, where are you?” Shaw asked on the other end. 

“I’m sitting under one of the trees, just walk around I’ll wave when I see you” 

Shaw sighed on the other end. “You can’t just find me?” 

“Nope! You have to find me. I’m not moving.” Shaw dramatically sighed. “Just come find me. Trust me it’ll be worth it.” 

“Alright,” Shaw said. “I’ll find you, I can see the park now. Be ready.” He hung up the phone just a moment after that. 

Your eyes swept around the park looking for him. You looked for that familiar lavender hair or that patented leather jacket he seemed so very fond of. Still, it was hard to see through all the crowds of people, the way they crowded up the paths and sidewalks and made it even harder to see anyone specific. 

Once you saw that lavender hair sticking out of the crowd your hand was raised in the air, waving wildly to try and grab his attention, and as some of the people thinned out you could clearly see Shaw walking down the sidewalk, his eyes also looking around the park to try and find you. 

After waving your hands for a few more moments, Shaw's eyes met yours, a spark of recognition crossing his face, and then, his facial expression slowly changing as he noticed where you were sitting, and the assortment of food that you had put around yourself. All for him. 

He stopped just a few steps away from you, you could tell that he was trying to hide his exact facial expression. Trying to hide it with his classic cool and unbothered face, but his eyes didn't lie, and the way they seemed to be sparkling. 

"What's this?" Shaw asked as he looked down at the set up. You smiled and motioned to the blanket you had spread out on the ground. 

"Happy birthday Shaw." You said, his eyes looked like they were glowing. His pupils wide as he took it all in. His mouth was slightly open, like he couldn't quite believe what it was that he was seeing in front of him. "What are you doing just standing there! Come on, sit down." 

After a half a moment of him staring he sat down on the other end of the blanket. He still wasn't saying much, almost uncharacteristically quiet. 

"What do you think? I tried to make some things I know you like. It's no hotpot but I couldn't quite figure out how we could do hotpot in the park, but since the weather is so nice I figured that a picnic would be nice!" 

Shaw looked at you, and in the moment that he was staring at you it was like an instant change. He cleared his throat and let his usual cool and collected expression return to his face, looking cool, calm, and collected like he had been expecting this the whole entire time. 

“It doesn’t look too bad.” He finally said. You smiled at him, a comment like that from Shaw was quite the compliment. “You did all this?”

You nodded. “Yeah I made all this last night and this morning.” You handed him a can of coke and a can of pepsi, his two favorites. “Consider this a double celebration, we’re celebrating your birthday and you finishing your finals.” Shaw looked up and down at the picnic food on the blanket and you sitting on the other end of the blanket. 

Shaw’s usual smirk reappeared on his face as he popped the tab open on the can of coke, taking a long sip. “I suppose I can admit you made an okay show of pretending to forget today.” 

“I would never forget!” You said, “I’ve had the date written down on my calendar ever since I found out when your birthday was.” 

Shaw’s face was unreadable, he hid his expression by sipping on his soda. Trying to keep his face away from you, as if by looking at you it would reveal something he wasn’t ready for you to see yet. 

Maybe you would have asked if he was okay, or try to say something to make him face you again. But before you could do anything about that thought your attention was broken by the raindrops that fell right on top of your head. 

The rain started to fall faster, dark rain clouds overtaking the whole no-longer blue sky. You looked up at the sky, as the raindrops started falling faster and harder. Within seconds it was pouring down rain on the once warm soil. 

It seemed to take Shaw a bit longer to notice the rain that was soaking his hair and clothes. Once he noticed his eyes went upwards to look up at the now darkened sky. 

Although he didn't say it, and neither did you, you had a very good feeling that you knew what had caused this sudden rainstorm. 

Looking around the park, the once happy families and couples were packing up their things, running for shelter or to their cars, no one seemingly prepared for any kind of sudden rain. Even you, who should have prepared for this possibility, hadn't even considered the idea that it could rain. Especially with the person you were with. 

"Shit, the food!" You quickly tried to repackage and rewrap the food you'd brought, trying to keep it from getting wetter and ruined. 

"It's just a little rain" Shaw said looking up at the sky, he must have known the rain's origin. There's no way that he couldn't have known what caused this. 

“I would say it’s a little more than a little rain!” You tried to shove them back into the basket. "Also I don't want all this food getting wet and soggy." You pushed back some of your wet hair as the raindrops ran down your face and neck. 

Quickly you put all the food back into the basket, and motioned for Shaw to stand up, the blanket below you was already soaked, and the mud started to stick to the other side. You bit your lip and you tried to fold it up the best you could. 

“Did you bring an umbrella?” You asked him, Shaw shook his head. 

“Didn’t think it would rain.” You glared at him. “What?”

“You don’t just keep one on you in case of sudden rain? That seems to happen a lot around you.” You hugged yourself to try and keep warm as the rain soaked your clothes. 

“I didn’t think I’d need it.” Shaw said. “Besides, it’s June.” You resisted the urge to remind him that not only does it rain in June but the time of year doesn’t seem to matter when you have an Evolver who makes it rain whenever he’s in a good mood. 

Trying to hide from the rain under the tree you held the picnic basket close. “How about we go back to my place, we can eat there.” Shaw picked up your other bag, the one with his present hidden in it, biting your tongue you tried not to make clear that you didn’t want him seeing the contents just yet. But he didn’t try to look. 

“Here.” Shaw shedded his jacket and handed it over to you. You took the jacket, wrapping it around your shoulders, the arms a little too long and the jacket not quite fitting, but it was comfortable, and you could feel the lingering warmth from his body heat on it. 

“I’ll follow your lead.” Shaw said casually, shoving his hands into his pockets. 

Looking out to the rest of the now deserted park you mentally mapped the quickest way home, the two of you would be soaked, no doubt, but at least you could get back. 

Together you took off into the rain, trying to walk beneath any kind of cover you both could find on the way back. You held Shaw’s jacket close, as you did the scent of peppermint and light cologne was easy to pick up, an almost comforting smell. 

Throwing open the door to your apartment building you both breathed a sigh of relief when you were out of the rain, so filled with relief it took a few moments to realize something wasn’t right. 

“Someone turned off the lights.” You commented looking at the dark lobby. Shaw punched the up button on the elevator, to no avail. No elevator sounds, no lighting up on the button. 

“The power’s out.” He said, pushing wet hair out of his eyes. “Probably the heavy rain.” 

You withheld the groan growing in your throat. “Seriously?” You tried the elevator button 

yourself, with no better result. 

Shaw didn't seem nearly as bothered as you did, or at least he pretended like he wasn't bothered. He looked to the door leading to the stairs up. 

"Come on. I won’t carry you up the stairs." Shaw said, pushing open the door. 

You followed up, slowly trudging up the long stairwell, your socks squelching uncomfortably in your shoes. Your hair dripping with the rain, Shaw's jacket being the only thing giving you the smallest bit of comfort at the moment. 

The two of you eventually made it up to your floor, and down your hallway to your door. You couldn't waste any time with sticking in your key and getting through the door. 

Your apartment was dark, just like the lobby, no lights on, not even the stove or oven. The apartment was completely dark beyond the small amount of light coming in through the window, and completely silent without the hum of the fridge or your computer. 

You set the picnic basket down on the table, rushing to the bathroom to grab towels. Grabbing the biggest towels you had in your cupboard. Tossing one to Shaw and using your own to dry your face and hair first. 

"I'm gonna change clothes." You told him. Then looked him up and down. “I’d offer you some of mine but I’m not sure they’ll fit.”  You racked your brain, there must be something you could offer him. “I could ask my neighbor, he’s a little shorter than you but maybe-” 

Shaw shook his head. “Don’t worry about it.” 

“But-”

“I’m not that wet.” Shaw said as he dried off his hair, the lavender strands still damp when he pulled the towel away. Shaw looked you up and down, that mischievous look reappearing in his gaze “You on the other hand-” He said with that tone that could have suggested anything. 

“Shaw!” You said as your cheeks flushed red. His smirk intensified at your flustered face, and you did your best to reel it in. After all that was the reaction he was hoping for. You huffed and pulled out a set of clean clothes from your closet. 

You left him in the living room while you changed clothes, drying your hair further in the darkness of the bathroom. You probably should have predicted a result like this, but it was too late to go back now. 

In dry clothes and sufficiently put back together you ventured back into the living room. Shaw stood with his shirt in his hands as he set it on your clothes drying rack in the corner of your apartment. 

Although his back was turned to you, you quickly averted your gaze from him as the flush returned to your face. You kept your eyes on the ground as you put away your other damp clothes to be washed and dried once the power was back.

“Oi.” Shaw said, You kept yourself from looking directly at him. “Why are you staring at the floor like that? Did you break your neck putting on a shirt?” Your face turned an even brighter red color as he spoke. 

“I-” You turned your head away. “I’m just thinking.” You tried to steer the conversation in a different direction. Maybe so he wouldn’t try and pull an even more embarrassed reaction out of you. 

Shaw’s slit brow raised up, his classic playful expression returning in full force. “What could you possibly be thinking about?” He said, walking towards you. Still feeling too flustered to look at him, you grabbed the throw blanket from the couch and tossed it at him. 

“You’re probably cold right? There’s no heating right now so you must be freezing.” Your words came out faster and maybe a little more jumped than you’d typically like. Watching him out of the corner of your eye he unfolded the blanket and placed it over his bare shoulders, relieving a little bit of your embarrassment. 

The picnic basket still left on the table caught your eyes once you felt calm again. The basket was still a bit wet, raindrops clinging to the top and sides of the basket. The bag with Shaw’s present is also just as damp. Glancing from the picnic basket to the blanket around Shaw’s shoulders, an idea formed in your head. 

“What’s going on in your head?” Shaw asked, poking your arm playfully. 

You smiled and looked at him. “The rain ruined my original plan but, I think I know what we can do to still celebrate.” You picked up one of the other throw blankets on the couch, and unfolded it and spread it on the living room floor. 

Shaw caught onto your plan pretty quickly, you handed him the picnic basket and pointed to the blanket. “You get this all set up, I’m going to go and find some candles so we can have a little bit of light.” 

You arranged your candles and flashlights around the blanket so there was at least some light overlooking your picnic food, even if some of the items had become slightly soggy from the rain. 

“Nice atmosphere.” Shaw joked. 

You rolled your eyes at him. “We can always eat in the dark.” 

“Nah.” Shaw said as he took a bite of the sandwich you’d made. “The dark is for other things.” He gave you a suggestive look as he said that, making your face turn red again. 

“Don’t be gross!” 

Shaw’s suggestive smirk only intensified. “I saw how embarrassed you were when you came out here. I know what I look like. You can-”

“Shaw stop it!” You said louder, trying to hide your flustered expression in the shadows left by the candles and flashlights. “I don’t care if it’s your birthday, I will make you go back out in the rain.” 

Shaw’s expression changed, but you still saw that mischievous spark, although that was just a regular feature of Shaw’s face. “You sure do get embarrassed easily.” He said as he took another bite. You ignored his comment, not interested in humoring his dirty mind further. 

“I’m surprised you didn’t have other plans today.” You said, looking up at Shaw. “I figured you’d go to Live House or hang out with the band.” 

Shaw shrugged. “Birthdays aren’t that big of a deal.” He said, sipping on the new can of cola you’d gotten him. “Besides, I knew you had something planned.” 

“Wait, how did you know?” 

“You’re not very good at surprises.” Shaw set the can of cola down as he picked at the side dishes. “I will give you one thing though, I wasn’t expecting this.” 

A smile broke across your face. “Do you like it?” 

Shaw looked back up at you. “It’s alright, you didn’t do too bad.” 

“Well,” you sat up straighter and leaned for the closed bakery box you’d set next to the picnic basket. “I still have a few surprises left in me.” You set the bakery box between you. Shaw’s expression changed as you opened up the top. Revealing the birthday cake you’d gotten for him. A simple cake frosted in blue with a dorky looking shark frosted onto the top, Happy Birthday Shaw! Written in black frosting below it. 

Shaw’s face shifted through a variety of emotions in a few seconds, at first confusion, surprise, and then he started laughing. Covering his mouth as he laughed. 

“What is that?” Shaw said between laughter. “It looks so childish.” 

You huffed, “It’s what the bakery had! And I figured you wouldn’t want a boring cake!”

Shaw managed to get his laughter under control as he looked at the cake again. “Let’s hope it tastes good for your sake.” He said, handing him a fork you both dug into the cake, not even bothering to slice it. 

The cake was sweet, and thankfully unaffected by the rainstorm, the cake flavor was fairly basic but the sweetness was enough to make it good. Shaw also seemed pleased with the flavor, taking bite after bite of the cake without complaint. 

Once the two of you had pretty much eaten the entire frosted shark you both considered that more than enough cake for the two of you. Now, it was time for your final surprise. 

Shaw was still focused on the cake when you pulled out the two gift wrapped packages, holding them out for him. 

“Your final surprise of the day, I promise.” 

Shaw took the two boxes, setting one down and unwrapping the other. You watched him intently as he ripped away the wrapping paper. 

A slight surprised noise came from Shaw as he looked at his gift. “A children’s fossil dig kit?” He held the box in his hands, the front showing two children digging in the play sand for plastic fossils. He gave you a bizarre look. 

“I thought it’d be fun! Little field work practice.” 

“It’s for children.” Shaw said. “Do I look like a child?” 

You reached for the toy. “If you don’t want it I’ll just return it then-”

Shaw pulled the box away. “Nuh uh, you don’t get to take a gift back. This is mine.” Shaw set the box down beside him, out of your grasp. You settled back where you sat, even if he wouldn’t say it, you knew he did like the gift. He picked up the second item, much smaller than the first, barely bigger than a stack of envelopes. 

Tearing the wrapping paper away, once again he seemed a bit confused by the gift in his hands. A stack of notecards, hole punched and held together by a binder ring. Each one with slightly different writing on it. 

“This is?” Shaw asked you, giving you a look. 

“It’s a coupon book, for my time and for favors. If you want to drag me along to a concert or an antique fair, you can use those, and I can’t say no.” 

“And I can use these for any kind of favor?” 

You nodded. “Yep! Anything at all.” 

Shaw looked back at the coupon book and then at you. A particular look in his eye. As he looked at you, you watched as the blanket that had been around his shoulders started to fall. 

Opening the binder ring he handed you one of the notecard coupons. “I’m using one right now, my first request.” Shaw scooted closer to you, so close you could feel the body heat radiating from his bare torso. “I want you to spend every one of my birthdays with me.” 

“Every single one?”

Shaw nodded. “Every single one.” Your eyes were locked together, your wide eyes against his slightly troublesome gaze. Still you weren’t worried about what was going on in his head. Beyond that troublesome gaze, there was also the softness in his face, the way he looked perfectly calm, and perfectly happy. “I think I have another idea for a coupon to use right now.” 

Smiling gently at him, you reached out to hold his hand, not breaking eye contact for a second. 

“I think I’ll let this one be a freebie.” 

Shaw leaned closer, until your foreheads were practically pressed together. 

“Perfect.” He whispered, closing the small gap between you. His soft lips pressed against yours he pulled away just a centimeter after one long kiss.

“This, I think, is the best gift I’ve gotten all day.”

[bippityboppitybibuck]

@valleydean As of the start of writing this it's nearly 3:30 in the morning, I am almost exactly 13 hours away from the minute I was born on this day 23 years ago and I am awake thinking about Dean fucking Winchester so here you go. As a weird birthday gift from me to you on my birthday, I present mild angst but also of course fluff. By the time you get this my birth minute will have passed and I will be 23 ((oh my god just like Dean and Cas AGS.)) As with all of my ags posting this contains spoilers for the story, you’ve been warned!!

Dean’s 27th birthday snuck up on him. Well, as much as a date that comes around every year without fail can sneak up on a person who also has a solid five people clamouring to remind him. Somehow even Jack memorized the date after he heard Cas talk about it one time years ago and now the kid won’t stop bringing it up, which yeah is cute as hell but also Dean’s never been one to make a big deal of his birthdays before.

But 27 fucks him up. And hard.

He’s officially lived longer than Dean Wesson did, which sure, he technically did when he made it to the end of December, but the milestone feels bigger now that he’s 27. He’s 27. Dean’s never been 27 before because Dean Wesson never made it to 27.

It shouldn't mean anything, Dean Wesson is as much him as he is, even more so now that there’s no door keeping the memories from the light of day, but as he'd watched the clock flick from 11:59 to 12:00 with Cas beside him ready to give him his first of 27 birthday kisses something within him had felt morosely finalized.

A chapter closed, one that he’ll never be able to reopen the same way he did the first time around. Dean Wesson’s story is over. Dean Wesson’s story is his, but a part of it, the largest, hell only, part of that story came to a close when those red numbers switched over.

He doesn't know what to feel. He doesn’t know how to feel the loss, he died so young, he died with so much life still to live, he died and left Sam to live his decades out alone. He was young.

It never registered, even back then, how young he was, and he’s sure that with every birthday he has going forward that feeling is only going to get worse.

He and Charlie spent the Halloween of their 21st year watching the clock in a similar way. Waiting for the moment they lived longer than the Potter’s did - Charlie's idea that Dean went along with without putting up a fight - and it felt like this did. A shock to the system, a race won that you hadn’t known you were running. The realization that they were barely adults and now you are there living past what they ever got to.

Except, this time, it’s him he outlived. He outlived himself. It’s different for Cas, or at least Dean thinks it is, because there was never that separation, that differentiation within Cas of his two lives because there was no distinct difference when it came to his knowledge and understanding of his old life - and therefore no disconnect from himself in that way. Cas’ disconnect came in another way but Cas has already outlived himself sorta… it’s hard for Dean to tell when technically Cas has only really been alive for a short time but still was resurrected at the age he died at. Either way, Cas never made a fuss about being older than his past self.

The clock reads 12:02 now, Cas is sitting behind him, arms wrapped around his middle and Dean can’t think of what to say. 27 isn't a big birthday milestone, there's no grand party waiting for him with cards that list his age or balloons or any of the hooplas that 30 or 50 gets but this birthday feels more momentous than any he’s had or will ever have. He just doesn’t know how to deal with that yet, so he just goes and grabs it all right by the horns.

“I’m older than he was,” he says into the stillness of the dark room.

“Who? - oh, yes I suppose you are,” Cas responds, dropping his chin against Dean’s shoulder and resting it there.

“You never loved me at 27 before, is it any different?” There's a fear there he can’t name, something brought forth from etches in his bones that whisper that Cas may never love him like he did Dean Wesson, shared memories be damned, years spent together be damned.

“Mhmm, no it’s not, I love you all the same. Maybe even a little more now. A little more love with every year we get together that we never got before. Also, I’m loving you right now, that counts as loving you at 27 doesn’t it?”

“Yeah, I guess it does.” He drops his head back against Cas’ shoulder, their cheeks brushing gently together with the ebb and flow of their breathing.

“Do you feel any different?” Cas asks lightly, tentatively, as though he knows Dean is struggling with this new reality.

“Outrageously so. But I couldn’t begin to tell you why. There's just this thought that he’s not there anymore, he doesn’t have any side-by-side memories now. I don’t have any memories anymore… I sorta got used to them always being there, following me through the things I experienced in real time. But now I’m going to do things and I won’t be able to think back to what I did before. He’s not felt so separate since before Dorthey and the manor and I don’t really know what to make of it.”

“You know you can mourn him Dean. That is allowed. You can mourn that loss of yourself. Grieve for the future you didn’t get before.”

“But why should I? I mean I’m here now, with you, Sam, Mom, Charlie, Kelly and Jack too even if they are thousands of miles away. I’m getting to live, I’m getting my future and Dean Wesson is getting it too because he’s me, I’m him. I just - he feels disjointed within me now and I want the peace back but I don’t know how I’ll ever manage to get it when from here on out Dean Wesson stops being there alongside Dean Winchester. I’m moving away from him and like everything that dies, he’s stuck perpetually at 26. He’s stuck and I have to leave him behind.”

Something thick coats his throat with the words, a darkness that seeps in and threatens to choke him if he’s not careful. Grief is such a finicky thing.

“You don’t have to Dean, same as you don’t have to leave your middle school self behind or your pre my resurrection self behind. It’s all you in there still. You get to pick what you carry with you for the rest of your life. If you don’t want to leave that part of yourself in your past, then don’t and keep it with you.”

Dean’s quiet for a while, thinking about a lot of shit, including how the hell Cas managed to get so good at this shit, because that little speech would put Dr. Phil to shame in an instant. But then of course Cas would probably have had to do the very thing he’s telling Dean now.

“Do you remember how we spent my first 25th birthday?” Dean asks.

“Hmm, I do, and I gotta say the frozen ass I got from the fence was completely worth it.”

Dean huffs a laugh into the darkness, picking his head up from Cas’ shoulder as he asks, “Do you think that for the first birthday he won’t have we could do that again? Fly back to Amherst, maybe see Kelly and Jack too?”

“Absolutely, but no smoking this time, even if I did get a rise out of you back then.”

“You bastard, I knew that was intentional!”

“You caught me,” Cas says, the phrase all but dripping in sarcasm. “Jack will be thrilled to see us again, Kelly too.”

He smiles picturing it. Cas playing with Jack, running around the backyard of the duplex Kelly bought only a year ago, smiles wide, Jack’s blonde hair sticking haphazardly out of his puffball touque, Cas’ hair tucked into a hat he’ll surely steal from Dean. Their joyful shouts echoing around them all. So like they used to all those years ago when Jack was barely five, and now he’s almost double digits and Dean can’t remember the years flying by until he looked back and they were already so securely in the rearview.

“I’m old now,” Dean says a little while later.

“If it makes you feel any better, regardless of what that fake ID you made says, my birth year is technically 1845 so… I’ve got you beat in the old age department.”

“Oh Cas, you don’t look a day over a hundred and twenty, you’re fine,” Dean jokes, Cas’ light mood rubbing off on him.

Dean gets a pinch to the ribs in retaliation and awards Cas an indignant squawk and a begrudgingly given laugh before he settles back against him, his eyes slipping closed though he wants not for sleep.

“What should we do now, I’m not particularly tired, and I feel certain in assuming that you aren’t either,” Cas murmurs lowly, breath dusting the shell of his ear soothingly.

“I dunno, maybe we should just keep sitting here,” Dean says, a memory playing behind his closed eyelids. In the heat of the room, frozen air bites at his skin just as it did back then.

Cas answers this time around, but instead of using words he pulls Dean in for a kiss - the second of his 27 birthday kisses - and within that press of lips Dean knows he remembers too.

Their skin pressed firmly together, neither move, their eyes kept forward, staring through the window at the still portrait of the winter stars.