#he's just a human

[ghostlynimbus]

how the fuck did phil callahan somehow end up tagged as a participant in every event in my timeline how how how

[wasabi-gumdrop]

local ladies man’s signature move totally useless against autistic monster enthusiast. more on Kabru’s fumble era at 6

[chloesimaginationthings]

FNAF Pit bonnie considers himself a great dad!

[mist-the-wannabe-linguist]

Dunno how to put it properly into words but lately I find myself thinking more about that particular innocence of fairy tales, for lack of better word. Where a traveller in the middle of a field comes across an old woman with a scythe who is very clearly Death, but he treats her as any other auntie from the village. Or meeting a strange green-skinned man by the lake and sharing your loaf of bread with him when he asks because even though he's clearly not human, your mother's last words before you left home were to be kind to everyone. Where the old man in the forest rewards you for your help with nothing but a dove feather, and when you accept even such a seemingly useless reward with gratitude, on your way home you learn that it's turned to solid gold. Where supernatural beings never harm a person directly and every action against humans is a test of character, and every supernatural punishment is the result of a person bringing on their own demise through their own actions they could have avoided had they changed their ways. Where the hero wins for no other reason than that they were a good person. I don't have the braincells to describe this better right now but I wish modern fairy tales did this more instead of trying to be fantasy action movies.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Dog Meshi.

[roninkairi]

You can only reblog this today.*

*PLEASE READ THE TAGS

[yourangle-yuordevil]

That time in ancient Greece when Aziraphale needed a speedy horse and accidentally invented the pegasus

VS.

Whatever Crowley had going on in medieval times

[wanologic]

always good to keep a screamhole handy

[sonicman66]

DpxDc fic where Danny is just haunting the Bats and providing memes to the internet whilst being invisible

Because I read a fic ('the curious case of who lives in the walls' by RaccoonRobyn over on ao3) that has Danny chilling in the Wayne Manor's walls and commenting on the Wayne's habits and goings on and i just

Tl;dr danny has a twitter page where he invisibly follows the bats and documents their funny mistakes like a nature documentary.

One day a Gothamite spots a new twitter page on their feed. Its not got a lot of posts, but they're all pictures. And the first one is... Nightwing. Lying on the concrete, face-down, with another bat or bird very obviously laughing at him.

They think nothing of it. They compliment the photoshop for its realism, and move on. Except there's more pictures. All of them, every last one of them, has the Bats and Birds suffering from a trip, fall, a gaffe, a misstep, anything and everything.

And then they find a video

Its clearly a handheld or phone camera, pointed at Robin in an alleyway. Someone starts talking, in a very poor attempt at sounding like David Attenborough, narrating like a wildlife documentary. "Here we see the youngest of the Bat-brood partaking in one of its more private behaviors, unseen and unknown by its kin."

And Robin just. Steps further into the alleyway and gets swarmed by stray cats, all begging for food. He grins and starts feeding them, all whilst narration continues, talking about this like its an animal's behavior.

And they have more. So many more.

A video of Red Hood. He does a fancy gun twirl when nobody's around, bobbles it, and accidentally fires into the ground. He picks it up and acts like nothing happened. But the video sees all.

A video of Batman on a gargoyle on a skyscraper, with shaky footage from clearly around a corner, but on the same level. "Commentary on this specimen has been added in post, for reasons you will soon see. Batman, the patriarch of the Bat-Brood, is incredibly elusive to research, and for good reason." In the video, the camera jolts a little and Batman turns suddenly to the sound of rocks moving. The camera goes still, and Batman scans the area, seemingly seeing nothing. Then, his white eyes turn blue, and he looks directly into the camera. Footage ends.

The acc posts a screenshot of a dm that is very clearly an Oracle sockpuppet. She has sent something along the lines of 'how have you obtained this footage, this is dangerous,' etc etc. His response is 'i am in ur walls lol'

He is not aware of the level of Bat Paranoia this brings out.

[bet-on-me-13]

The cult of...Danny Fenton?

So! Way back when Danny first moved into his new neighborhood in Gotham, he had some trouble controlling his Powers. The different Types and Levels of Ectoplasm in the air when compared to Amity had thrown off his control.

He was used to being in places where his Ectoplasm meshed well with the Atmosphere, like a Water Balloon in a Pool, but in Gotham that analogy would be closer to a Water Balloon in the sewers. It was too different from what he was used to to fully control his Powers.

So it's understandable that he messed up a few times and his neighbors found out about his Abilities.

They took it well at first, Danny wasn't going to go Rogues or anything, and he never used them maliciously, but eventually they got curious.

They asked what his limits were, how he got them in the first place, and what the hell the Ghost Zone was. The answers "None Really", "I died and was reborn", and "A Collective of every Afterlife at once" did spark some interesting reactions from them.

Most importantly, a few of them joked about him being an Eldritch God that they needed to worship. He was good enough friends with them that at that point they felt comfortable pranking eachother, so they did just that.

Danny woke up one day on his birthday, and saw all of his friends and neighbors surrounding the makeshift Throne they had made and put him on while he was asleep. The entire day they chanted stuff like "The Great One requires Ms. Smiths Apple Pie for his day of birth!" And "The Great One Wishes for us to sing the Ritual Song! Happy Birthday to You! Happy Birth-"

After his birthday, they kept up the joke.

It didn't help that his powers had evolved Again! And now he could bestow abilities onto his friends. The jokes they made about their God granting them Supernatural Powers to rule the world with were insufferable.

Then, one day while he was just resting at home, watching a movie on his TV, he felt a Pull at his Core. The same kind of Pull whenever he was being summoned. But why would they summon hi- Oh Shit! It's Mr Jenkins Party today! He was supposed to meet them at the Warehouse they used for special events an Hour Ago!

He quickly accepted the Summoning, but was met with a suprising sight. His Neighbors all tied up in a pile to his right, a spilled table of party food to his left, and right in front of him, Batman and his Family watching him with wary eyes.

Slowly, he opened his mouth. "...so, did you come for the party or..."

[1001aus]

AU where Danny has spent a very long time in the Infinite Realms for one reason or another (time travel work for Clockwork, Ghost King business, fled Earth for some reason, decided he didn't jive with living under capitalism, realized he wasn't aging, whatever).

On his first trip out to the living world where he actually interacts with living people, he drops into a reality where the Justice League exists and gets curious about the Watchtower. It's definitely Earth technology, but it's way different than anything he's seen them build before. How cool! He has to check it out.

He gets intercepted. Danny's first introduction to the Justice League is Green Lantern, Superman, and Martian Manhunter. They're friendly enough when they realize he's just curious.

In the course of talking, his abilities come up. Danny talks about his ice and the time powers Clockwork started teaching him after AGIT.

Then one of them says something along the lines of "and you can fly."

Danny gives them a weird look.

"...and I can walk?"

Which is about the moment that they realize that, not only has Danny assumed that flight is normal for them (since all of the people he's met since showing up are capable of it), but he could have any number of abilities that he considers not worth mentioning.

[ceniwen]

zhongli please stop cosplaying as a human your adeptus has social anxiety and can't cope

[anbaisai]

Blep. (Sequel to the boop)

Or alternatively titled: Snake Jamil, but even larger noodle

The species that Jamil is based on here is called the Blood Python (special thanks to @kirexa for the information!), which can reach an average of 4-6 ft in length and up to 30 lbs in weight.

Bonus panel:

[chloesimaginationthings]

Michael Afton draws FNAF tape girl for Vanessa,,

[theyhitthepentagon]

post from my priv sorry i cooked

[ruporas]

need to exist in your warmth (id in alt)