#honorable mentions that i still very much plan to finish at some point:

[bearsizedant]

wip game

tagged by @brainworm-terrarium!!

i'm not that great at naming my wips but anyway—

writing:

•Sing To Me About The End Of The World- my Ji'vi fic about her life before going to the College of Winterhold (title is from Arise by Flyleaf which is one of my favorite songs)

• unnamed Handers fic- Ursula and Anders are on their way to Skyhold and they are having such a fun trip 🙃🙃

art:

• the Herald's Rest series (I have 8 parts planned in total, but who knows if I ever actually finish)

•Sera and Blackwall dick joke comic

•oc references

not sure who to tag who hasn't been tagged already, so I'm extending the invitation to anyone interested!!

[kakushino]

Lady in Red, Gentleman in Black

Tomioka Giyuu x Fem! Reader

Your boss had given you the responsibility of hosting that night. It led to something you didn't anticipate.

Tags: Mafia AU, mentioned character death, Yandere content, fluff, dub-con, smut, creampie, sub reader, mild bondage, mention of contraception/lack of it Word count: 6,8k

Masterlist

Your boss had given you the responsibility of hosting tonight; it was an honor to finally do an event solo - an important gala at that. Your boss had been secretive about the people who you were hosting though.

Makeup on point, hair styled to perfection.

You were ready.

At least once you found your neutral gray suit, you would be. Where was it? You swore you put it somewhere…

Oh, you were not ready.

You totally forgot to wash it. The suit of your choice was laying in the hamper, where you left it over a week ago. That meant only one thing… you had to wear the red dress your boss bought you for Christmas, or well, her money bought it - she’d given you a gift card to one of the fancier stores in the city so you had to make use of it. You’d planned to wear it to an event for fun not for work… it was even hardly suitable, with how low-cut the décolleté was. Had you not put on mascara already, tears of frustration would stream down your cheeks.

It was not going to be totally appropriate… but it would have to do. At least the skirt was flowy and not hugging your figure; it would have been hell on earth if you would have to be in a tight dress for the whole night. 

You quickly found a pair of comfortable low heels, grabbed your purse and went to catch a taxi to the venue. It was still some hours before the start, but you had to make sure everything was perfect.

And it was. You’d spent weeks planning it with the knowledge the client was important and was not to be displeased. All the specifications were assented to by your boss before you finalized anything, so you were pretty confident in the client’s approval. The catering was on point, waiters ready, bars stocked, and the opening went without a hitch. You kept up your rounds checking on each staff group to keep things running smoothly.

There was only one thing that was… not perfect.

There was a man behind you from the start, though he kept his distance.

He was following you, that much was obvious to you. A gentleman in all black - black suit, black dress shirt, black tie, black hair, eyes dark like the night sky-

“Miss?” 

You looked up from your flute of non-alcoholic champagne. A man in a dark blue suit with a green and yellow turtle-shell patterned tie approached you. “How may I help you?”

He gave you a friendly smile. “You just seemed lonely in your little corner. Thought you needed some company.” He grabbed a glass of wine from a passing waiter and raised it to you. 

You hesitantly clinked glasses together, a polite smile on your face as you both drank your drink of choice. “That’s very kind of you, sir.”

“You don’t have to call me ‘sir’. We’re all friends here, aren’t we?” 

You finished off your glass so you didn’t have to respond. He was quite forward, yet he hadn’t even given you his name. 

And you weren’t willing to tell him yours first.

“Do you live nearby?” he asked, swirling the wine in his glass, seemingly uninterested yet hanging on every word you were about to say.

You regretted chugging your drink. Setting down the flute on a nearby table, you were about to answer-

“May I have this dance?” 

You turned. It was not the man in front of you who asked. Instead, it was the gentleman in black who had been watching you the whole evening. His jaw was clenched, but expression was otherwise unreadable. His dark eyes were actually blue, and they pierced you with intensity you were not used to.

“Yes, thank you,” you shot an apologetic look to the man, who was speaking with you just moments before, and followed the gentleman to the dance floor. 

“The name’s Giyuu, Tomioka Giyuu,” he murmured as he took you into his arms, slow waltz starting to play. His frame was solid, offering you all the support a follower could want in a leader; it was as if he had been dancing for years and years, and the first few steps confirmed it - that is, if he wasn’t just crazy talented. 

You told him your name as he led you into a spin, making you feel like a princess as your skirt flowed in the motion. There weren’t many dancers on the parquet but you still felt very much alone there, with his warmth and strength leading you through the waltz. You didn’t want the dance to end.

Tomioka remained silent throughout the first song. 

Thinking it was a one time deal, you stepped back from him once it ended. However, his grip on your hand did not let up. 

“One more?” he asked quietly as a much faster music started to play. Yet another classic, a viennese waltz this time.

Though you weren’t sure if you could keep up with him, something made you agree. Perhaps it was the way he didn’t force needless small talk on you, or the way he offered you the support you needed to glide through the forms and figures of the dance. Maybe it was the way you two fit like a glove, or the way his darkness complimented your bright red dress.

Either way, you spent more time in his arms than out of it for the rest of the evening, orbiting each other like galaxies about to collide. 

You still had to do your rounds, and it surprised you he kept you company even then, guarding your back as you did so. As the night wore on, you started to actually talk in between the conversations with the staff and the many, many dances.

He lived at the edge of the city, he didn’t have any pets, he liked the color blue, his favorite food was salmon with daikon. 

You sat down for the first time of the night, moaning softly in relief. Your heels were comfortable, but not that comfortable. 

Though he wasn’t as animated with his emotions, there were minimalistic expressions on his face that you were able to catch because… well, you were looking. Giyuu was an attractive man, and you wouldn’t mind at all if he asked-

“May I have your number?”

You looked up at him as he stood by your side, a silent protector. You wondered why he hadn’t sat down at all. “Only if I may have yours.” You smiled, face feeling hot.

You went out shopping before your first date. He'd told you to wear something classy, formal. 

You were lucky to find a nice dark blue dress to your knees. It looked classy enough in the shop, but by the time it was five minutes until he was to pick you up, you were overthinking. 

Was it formal enough? Was your make-up too slutty or was it just right? Should you wear higher heels or-

The doorbell rang.

All your thoughts vanished. Giyuu was here.

And gods did he look amazing. He wore a dark blue dress shirt, which was only slightly off-shade to your dress, and black suit, no tie. 

Your face was flushed as he led you to his car - black and elegant, like him - while he complimented your dress.

Ever the gentleman, he opened the doors for you - the car, the restaurant - and pulled out the chair for you too. Chivalry wasn't dead.

The restaurant itself was fancy yet cozy, the type you thought you'd only see in movies. The tables were far apart to offer privacy yet close enough not to be completely isolated. It was situated in a high rise building, giving you a view of the city skyline in the sunset. 

"I hope this setting is fine with you. I admit it has been a while since I'd gone out," Giyuu told you softly. 

You smiled. "I've never been treated like this on the first date before. I think you're doing more than fine."

This seemed to please him, the corner of his lips quirking up a little. “Good. I didn't want to make you think I would harm you in any way… That's why I chose a public place to meet at first.”

Your heart squeezed a little at the quiet confession, touched and a little in love that he thought of your feelings about the subject. It was true - had your first date been somewhere isolated, you wouldn't say yes to it, the threat of… what happens to women, and men both, too vivid in your mind's eye.

"Thank you. I appreciate the thought, Giyuu." Your smile widened, your face feeling a little hot. 

He only nodded in response, his eyes flitting between you and the rest of the room, as if he were keeping watch. He'd told you during the gala that he wasn't much for crowded spaces, so this kind of date was perfect. 

"Have you been here before?" you asked when a waiter brought you the menus.

"A few times, yes." Giyuu opened his, more looking at you than the lists of food on paper. "I don't want you to look at the prices… I asked you to accompany me so I'm paying."

Chivalry was not dead indeed.

The conversation flowed smoothly, both of you relaxing in the push and pull of different topics, gentle waves on a calm sea. As you spoke, you placed your hand on the table, nearly touching his own. Second by second, you both inched closer unconsciously. 

Your hands met, as did your eyes. Your face felt hot but you were smiling, delighted at the show of comfort and intimacy with this handsome man. His own lips were set in a relaxed line, not quite smiling but close, the deep sapphire of his eyes bright.

The waiter came and went, collecting the menus and your orders, leaving you alone again. A glint of a gold bracelet on the hand of one of the other guests reminded you of something.

“Do you like art, Giyuu?”

He tilted his head a little, the only reaction you got before he told you, “Art gives me a lot to think about.” 

There was a deeper meaning to his words, but you could not decipher it just yet. His response was not negative however, and you latched onto that, hope budding in your chest. “There will be an art exhibition in town soon. It’s called ‘All gold that glitters’ - I don’t know if you’ve heard about it?” 

Giyuu studied you for a moment, the silence just a few seconds short of becoming awkward. “Most of the display will be Gustav Klimt.”

Excited, you said, “Exactly! Once I heard it would be here, I wanted to see his works up close… Though I don’t know if I will get in. A friend told me the tickets might be sold out already. The painter is very famous after all.” All your energy evaporated as you realized the futility of the situation. “The crowds would be too much too… I’m sorry for rambling. I don’t know what has gotten into me.” You tried to laugh it off.

Giyuu looked at you for a moment longer before nodding. “You aren’t much for crowds either?” 

You nearly sighed in relief when he accepted your diversion. It amazed you how receptive he was with these hints despite appearing stoic. 

You smiled at him, “Not really. It sometimes gets too much. Even at work I…”

Even with your brief stumble in the conversation, you both enjoyed talking to each other for a long while. The topics flowed from one to another again, there wasn’t ever a lull in you sharing your thoughts. The gentle atmosphere of the restaurant added to your ease.

You were comfortable with him. And that surprised you - how quickly you let down your walls in front of a… 

He could no longer be called a stranger. The time you spent together at the gala made you friends in your eyes. This outing was a date - could you say he was your boyfriend? 

The food arrived, interrupting your thoughts.

His salmon with daikon looked delicious, and Giyuu must have thought so too, for he dug in very quickly, barely muttering out an “Itadakimasu,” before he munched away. You slowly started eating as well, looking at him. 

Your face felt hot as you watched him. He looked so cute; he was clearly enjoying each bite, his cheeks full of the food. 

He looked up only once, and he spoke, but you were not able to understand a word he said, his words sounding like gibberish to your ears. You could only giggle; you had never thought a gentleman like Giyuu would do this. 

“Sorry, sorry,” you looked down at your food with a secretive smile. It was endearing to see him so unguarded. Though you had to say that he seemed relaxed in your presence, that pleased you greatly.

You ate in silence, each stealing glances at the other. 

One glance at him bestowed a gift upon you that you never thought you would see, yet again. Giyuu was smiling while he ate his dish. Not only that. He was a messy eater, little bits of the food sticking on his cheeks. He looked absolutely adorable. You were smiling wide and you had a sudden impulse - one which you acted upon.

Giyuu froze when you leaned forward, rising from your seat a little. The blue dress clung to your chest, trying to contain your breasts from spilling over, digging into your skin a little.

He forced his eyes away from your cleavage, staring you in the face instead, but you were focused on his lips-? Were you about to-?

You reached out, thumb wiping at his cheek gently, and sat back down.

“You had a bit of rice on your face,” you grinned and ate the grain off of your thumb.

His face was red, blush stretching all the way to his ears.

Giyuu realized that he was in trouble, because something happened - something he didn’t account for.

He fell, hard.

“Where are we going?”

Giyuu had picked you up at your apartment, dashing as always in his black clothes. You didn't know how he did it, but everything looked so elegant on him - even if it was just a short-sleeved fitted shirt and black pants. 

"You'll see."

He'd offered you his arm, ever the gentleman, as you walked to his car. 

The two of you were a study in contrast, he thought. Where Giyuu was the dark, you were the light. You’d chosen a white sundress today, loose and airy - innocent and pure. A white rabbit hopping around in its meadow of flowers, unaware of the presence of a predator hiding in the shadows - a starved wolf, ready to pounce and claim the rabbit for its own.

The analogy reminded him of the fact he hadn’t given you any flowers yet. Fuck. He should’ve gone and bought you some before this date. Would you even appreciate flowers?

The drive was filled with warmth, despite the near-silence. It didn’t feel uncomfortable to not talk, you both were very much content. 

Or at least you were.

Giyuu had an urge to place his hand on your thigh, but he didn’t want to overstep or break the atmosphere, the comfort you were both in.

In the end, his willpower won. 

The car pulled into a side street, and you drove through a steel bar gate, the gate-keeper nodding at Giyuu respectfully. It made you curious where you were going. A small part of you rang warning bells - you didn’t know where you were and you didn’t know what would happen to you. But you trusted him, despite meeting with him only twice so far - today being the third. You hoped your trust was not misplaced.

Giyuu parked and turned off the engine, quickly getting out of the car and locking it when you reached for the handle. You looked at him in confusion, but then he was on your side, opening the door for you. Like a gentleman.

Blood rushed to your cheeks as you smiled at him. How could you have doubted him? He was such a silly man, trying to be as accommodating as possible for you. Giyuu took your hand in his, a loose hold which you could get out of easily if you wanted to.

He led you inside through a clearly personnel-only door, making you curious what exactly he’d planned for you two. 

An employee met you there, guiding you through various halls filled with wrapped… things? It looked like paintings but you couldn’t be sure.

“Enjoy your time,” the employee said, opening a door for you two at last. The light in the room turned on, reflecting golden hues off of every piece in the room.

This was it - ‘All gold that glitters’ was in front of you. But- it was supposed to open tomorrow, and there were no more tickets left, you’d checked, so how-?

You’d subconsciously stepped inside, letting go of his hand. You slowly looked around in awe, tears gathering in your eyes. You felt as if your soul had been caressed by Giyuu’s warm hands. 

Here, illuminated by the professional lighting and surrounded by paintings, the only art he saw was you. You spun in a circle, your loose skirt flaring up a little, your eyes sparkling as you took in the exhibition - devoid of life, sans the two of you. If he hadn't fallen for you already, he would have now.

Giyuu closed the distance, taking your hand in his again, bringing it to his lips to kiss your knuckles. Your excited expression made all the trouble he went through to get you both here worth it. 

Nevertheless, he asked, "Do you like it?"

You beamed. "I love it!"

You tugged at his hand, nearly skipping over to the first piece, absolutely delighted.

Flitting from piece to piece, you eventually let go of each other, content to enjoy the art at your own paces. There was no rush, no one to interrupt you two, you were there alone; just the two of you and the art.

You stood in front of Fulfillment, admiring the patterns. Each painting, each art piece, had a meaning and was supposed to evoke something in the viewer. Staring at the embrace of the two lovers, it gave you the same feeling you had when Giyuu took your hand for the first time - today. Dancing with him didn’t count, the restaurant didn’t count, that was you reaching out to him. Today was him seeking you out. 

Butterflies danced in your tummy as you smiled.

“Enjoying yourself?”

You looked at him, your smile widening. “Yes. You don’t know how special this is for me,” you admitted, walking closer to Giyuu. Glancing to the side, your cheeks felt hot. He was standing in front of the arguably most famous piece by Gustav Klimt.

The Kiss.

Giyuu remained silent.

You took in the details of the painting - the flowers, the position, the intimacy. You wished you’d be kissed like that, at least once in your life. An image flashed in your mind’s eye - of Giyuu holding you exactly like that, of kissing you exactly like that - and you had to blink and look at him again to make sure it was just a daydream, and not reality.

He was staring, his focus not on you as a whole, but on your lips. Your breath hitched in your throat.

There was conflict in his eyes when they met yours. It seemed as if the world held its breath for the two of you. 

The distance closed slowly as you gravitated towards each other, separate galaxies a hair’s width away from becoming one. So close yet so far.

You closed your eyes. Warmth touched your soul.

The first kiss was but a peck to the corner of your lips; your head tilted back slightly, one of his hands cradling the nape of your neck, the other cupping your jaw. You exhaled shakily. The first became second, right on the lips, soft and feather-light; then third, the air shared between the two of you.

There was a mist inside your mind, your thoughts incorporeal yet comforting, encompassing you in a blanket of Heavens. It didn’t feel wrong, nothing about this felt wrong; it was just right, being with Giyuu felt right. Each kiss stole your breath and returned it to you in the same second.

Giyuu felt as if life was filling his lungs for the first time in forever. Your warmth was everything, absolutely everything to him. You were so receptive to him, eyes closed and completely pliant in his hands. It felt as if you were made from the thinnest layer of gold leaf and one wrong move, one wrong touch would crumple you up, eternally lost.

Only when you both were nearly gasping for breath did you pull away. Giyuu was cradling you in his arms tenderly, a bright blush on his face, and you were hanging onto him for dear life, your own cheeks flushed.

It was a moment of understanding that you stood at the edge of something great blooming between the two of you, and neither wanted to stop it.

Giyuu signed the death certificate, numb.

Urokodaki Sabito, aged 28, dead. 

The pen rolled off the table and clattered onto the ground but he didn't care. The slight incessant ache in his arm hardly bothered him, the ache where his heart was felt like a more life-threatening wound than a mere scratch.

Sabito had nothing to do with the Ubuyashiki family, except being the relative and a friend of its members; Urokodaki Sakonji's only adopted son and Tomioka Giyuu's very best friend lay dead, the corpse long gone cold in the morgue.

It had happened so fast too.

One moment, Giyuu and Sabito were talking about Sabito’s upcoming wedding, the next, both were diving for cover as bullets flew overhead. Sabito had had some training from Urokodaki, though he'd steered clear of the true depth of mastery despite his clear talent at it. He'd always been better than Giyuu, at everything.

So why?

Why was Sabito dead and Giyuu alive?

Why was Giyuu still breathing and Sabito's chest forever stilled?

More importantly, who targeted him - them? Why had they done so? 

Were they going to strike again?

Oh no…

Not [Name].

Anything, anyone, but her.

He wanted to shout, to scream - She has nothing to do with this! Leave her alone! 

He knew, however, that it would be in vain. Whoever targeted them had done so very deliberately. They knew who would be where and at what time. 

And they could get to you too.

No.

He could not allow that to happen. He'd just gotten his first taste of you, an ambrosia for a mere mortal. 

And it wasn't even by his own making. It had been Sabito who'd forced him to approach you that night of the gala. He'd noticed Giyuu was following you around like a lost puppy all evening. He'd noticed and acted on it.

Sabito's interference led to a few of his happiest days in his life - the gala itself, the dinner, the museum, and the days spent texting one another.

All this could be lost with a short crack of thunder, a bullet released from the barrel of a gun - so disgraceful in these parts, where family conflicts were best solved honorably, with swords. 

He could not allow it to happen - no, he would not allow it to happen. He felt an intense hunger, his teeth ached with the need to bite, to tear flesh to shreds of those who would even think of hurting you, of those who would even look at you.

Giyuu's mind spiraled, a maelstrom pulling everything in reach down to treacherous depths. Plans made and discarded, his hand reached for his phone before he knew it, dialing your number before he could stop it.

"Hi," came your voice. Giyuu closed his eyes, enjoying the simplicity of hearing you, the knowledge you were still alive and well making his heart beat like a drum. "What's up?"

"Are you home?" 

"Yeah. Why? Is something wrong?" Hearing the concern in your voice would have made his chest feel warm normally, but this time the warmth was brought by the fact you were home, home meant safety… at least for a little while. He needed to get you close, to hold you in his arms.

His eyes snapped open. “I have something planned for us.”

"Planned? It's so sudden… It is a little late now but-"

“You just have to trust me," he interrupted you. “Understood?” He'd never used this tone of voice on you, the mask of a killer slipping on subconsciously.

There was a brief moment of silence. "Alright, Giyuu… I trust you.” 

I trust you. 

He hoped you’d trust him with your safety and life too.

“Thank you, dear. Wear that red dress for me.” 

He hung up, texting you his address along with 'Take your time' in the same breath. 

Giyuu had some preparations to make, after all.

You got out of the car - a driver he’d called for you, making you wonder just what his job was to have these connections - and stared at the house. You checked your maps, and it was indeed the address Giyuu had given you. 

The house was much bigger than you thought it would be. Sure, he was an elegant man, always put together but nothing about him screamed fancy… Okay, maybe a little. But this was a whole another level of-

The door opened. 

Your heart leaped in your chest, a smile rising to your face. Giyuu looked- your smile wobbled a little - he looked like he carried the whole world on his shoulders. You hurried to his side, clutching your purse and the wine you found in your storage - you wanted to bring at least something when visiting his home for the first time. Now it seemed you’d be drinking away some stress instead of celebrating life.

“Are you alright?” 

Instead of answering, he pulled you close, hugging you tightly, as if you’d run away from him if he was just a touch gentler. He buried his head into your neck, breathing you in. “You look beautiful… As beautiful as a rose in a bouquet…” 

Yet another thing he failed to do… He didn’t prepare any flowers for you again. He kept ruining everything, didn’t he?

You hugged him back awkwardly, the things in your hands a bit uncomfortable to hold at the same time.

Giyuu took a deep breath and pulled back enough to guide you inside. He closed the door and locked it. You placed the bottle and your purse both on the shoe cabinet at the side and embraced him again. He seemed to really need it. 

A moment later, he whispered. “Maybe that’s a wrong metaphor. You aren’t just one of many. You deserve to be the sole focus of the beholder…” His hold on you tightened again. “The beholder being me.”

His tone of voice made you shiver a little. Giyuu seemed to still be out of it. You had never seen him being as clingy or heard him speak as possessively as you did now.

“You’re mine, right?”

The question was a bit out of character to how you knew him. He was usually so reserved and soft with you. You didn’t hate it per se, but it was certainly strange. “Of course.”

“That’s right, you’re mine. Never doubt that you’re mine and only mine.”

You were a little confused about why he was like this, but you stayed silent.

“You never know who you can trust these days.”

You shivered again. “Giyuu, maybe we should sit down, yeah? Where..?” 

He stepped back and knelt at your feet, one of his hands raising your foot gently, the other pulling the straps of your shoes loose. Both heels fell to the ground, and he left them there, laying in the middle of the hall.

He stood up and took your hand in his, fingers intertwined and grip tight as if he never wanted to let go. Giyuu led you inside in a hurry, taking you through a spacious living room and up the stairs to- his bedroom?

“Don’t be afraid. You don’t need to be afraid of me,” he said lowly. “I’d never hurt you, my dear.” The pet name made blood rush to your cheeks.

Giyuu sat at the edge of the bed, guiding you to the space beside him, still clutching your hand. 

“Giyuu, I know you’re probably going through something… You don’t have to tell me. But I’m here for you, you know that, right?”

He nodded. You both stayed silent for a time. Your thoughts kept looping back, trying to think of what could be going on in his head. You realized you knew him, but at the same time you knew nothing about him.

His voice interrupted your train of thought. “I worry a lot for you.” 

You tilted your head, looking at him, “I worry for you too.”

Giyuu’s face relaxed minutely. He let go of your hand, stood up and grabbed you by your waist, moving you up the bed to lay on it, as he hovered above you, supporting his weight on his left hand beside your head. “From all the people I met in my life, from the billions I could have had - you are the One, and you are perfect. You’re perfect for me.” His right hand cupped your cheek, caressing your skin with his thumb. His eyes half-lidded, he leaned down for a slow and soft kiss. 

The kiss was everything to him.

When he pulled back, you said, “I’m just me… I can’t be perfect.” Yet he made you feel like you were.

His eyebrows twitched, as if he held back a frown. “Don’t ever doubt your worth, lovely.” 

The next kiss was just as slow as the previous one, but deeper, more sensual. It stole your breath away and conjured a fog over your mind; all you could focus on was him.

Giyuu trailed his lips over your jaw, pausing by your ear to whisper, “Nobody else can touch you but me.” 

“Yessss…” you hissed lowly in a daze, arching your head back, allowing him to continue kissing down your neck unobstructed.

“I’ll have to warn you, my dear, I am the jealous type,” he murmured against your pulse point. You wondered if he could feel it drumming against his lips. 

Giyuu bit down hard. You cried out in a mix of pain and surprise, waking up from the dreamy headspace he’d lulled you into.

“Giyuu!” You tried to struggle, but he held onto you, licking away the ache his teeth brought. Where before anticipation made your heart race, now it was fear, but you could only tremble in his grasp. There was no escaping the wolf now, and the wolf was starving.

He knew the effect this had on you. He knew that he wasn’t being as careful as he should be. It made his heart clench but it had to be done. He had to show everyone you were his. “There is no need to be scared as long as I’m here, my dear. I won’t hurt you and I won’t let anyone else touch you.” He won’t ever let you go.

You tried to slap him when he pulled back enough but he just caught your hand by the wrist, pulling it closer and kissing your palm gently. He maintained eye contact all the while, trailing his lips to the pulse point of your wrist. Your heartbeat grew faster against your will, the sensuality and intimacy of his gesture not lost to you.

His other hand reached into the back pocket of his pants, taking out a familiar green and yellow turtle shell necktie. "Please, don’t struggle so much," he whispered. 

Giyuu placed the tie next to your head. 

"You don’t want to see me angry, do you?"

You shook your head, this new version of him scaring you and arousing you at the same time. It was intoxicating. 

Would you even be allowed to speak? Did that count as ‘struggling’? You didn’t want to test his patience.

“Strip.” He leaned back, sitting on your thighs and waiting for you to obey. 

You couldn’t deny him. You knew he was strong, too strong to fight off or resist. You knew he’d take what he wanted regardless of what you tried to do. It was hot, your body felt hot all over. You felt like a freak for enjoying this, shame burning in your stomach as you undid the zipper on your side.

Giyuu watched you, eyes dark, while he himself undid the buttons on his black dress shirt one-handed. He shrugged off the material just as your dress slipped off your shoulders, leaving both of you bare from waist up. 

He was covered in lean muscle, a few scars on his torso- his biceps was in a bandage, a bloodied bandage. Your eyes focused on it, but he was focused on something else entirely.

Giyuu took your hands and bound them to the headboard with the green tie. You tried to wiggle out of them but he only smirked, dragging the red dress off of your figure, leaving you only in your panties.

"I never do something halfway, my dear, and I do need to prepare you for me," he murmured against your lips, his hand slipping under the seam of your silky panties. You were wet since before he'd led you to bed, too excited at seeing him, too turned on by his voice and scent. Now it only made you feel shame, for it made things easier for him.

But you couldn't truly say you hated what he was doing, especially when his nimble fingers slowly pushed into you. You gasped at the feeling, and he stilled for a moment.

"Does it hurt?" You shook your head, spreading your legs wider.

Giyuu swept his thumb through your wet pussy lips to circle at your clit in soft and slow motions. He studied your face for any discomfort as he started to pump slowly. 

"How do you want me to fuck you? Hard and fast or soft and slow? I will do whatever you ask of me, my dear." He curled his fingers inside of you, trying to find the spot that should make-

You moaned, flinching away from the shock of pleasure.

Giyuu swore later that your moans were the sweetest sounds he'd ever heard in his life; they were the only art a killer like him could create, and he intended to make a masterpiece of you.

As his right hand worked you up, he leaned down to kiss and bite at your throat, the vibrations against his lips feeling like Heaven on Earth.

His fingers played you like a string instrument, each flick and movement and curl dragging you higher and higher against your will, your moans pitching and breaking and finally cutting off in a silent scream as you came all over his hand.

"Beautiful…"

Giyuu withdrew his fingers, glistening with your cum, and brought them to his face, studying how the slick created a gooey string between them as he spread them apart. You had to look away from the lewd display, making his eyes snap back to your face.

You heard his belt buckle open, his weight briefly disappearing from your side. When the bed dipped again, his rough warm palms traced a path down your body, from your breasts, over your stomach, thumbs catching the fabric of your panties and pulling them down, down, down… off.

"To say you’re special is an understatement, [Name]," he whispered, spreading your legs and settling between them. 

Your whole body trembled, your arms tugging at your restraints again, but you were too weak, your orgasm chipped away at any strength you had left to truly resist him.

“You don’t just make me want you…" His lips kissed along your neck with feather-light touches, breath hot against your skin. "…You make me need you.” 

…Fuck if his confession didn't make you clench around nothing. Your mind fought against your heart and body in a three-way war, each trying to one-up the other. Your heart told you how deep you had fallen for him, how this was as good as a love confession. Your brain warned you you were in trouble, your boyfriend had lured you inside and was about to use you. Your body sang for the future pleasure he would bestow upon you, his talented fingers proving his skill.

"I'm keeping you here… for your own good." 

What? No- and Oh yes, please-! echoed in your mind.

"You will stay with me, you will never leave me, you will be safe here."

Oh, but how could you fight this?

 "I love you."

I love you.

Giyuu kissed you on the lips, deeply and passionately, setting you on fire with his touch.

You could feel him - feel his cock - against your body.

You could only shake in his all-encompassing arms.

He realized you were scared - of him. "I won’t harm you… I won’t ever, ever even think of harming you."

He kissed you again. He kissed you as if he needed it, needed you just to survive, like he needed you more than air itself. It was like he tried to devour you, a hungry wolf and a sweet rabbit.

And then he was sliding in. He'd prepared you to take him; even then the stretch was nearly too much anyway.

Giyuu slurred out a curse against your lips, the feeling of finally being enveloped by your snug warmth too much. His mind was nearly breaking, he'd never felt so loved, so intimate, so close to someone than he did as he bottomed out inside of your sopping wet cunt.

"You're perfect," he breathed out shakily, resting his forehead against yours.

He started slowly, letting you feel him inch by inch. You swore you could feel him in your throat, each glide felt as if he was pushing your organs apart, rearranging you from the inside to his liking.

Oh, but was it a delight. Fireworks exploded behind your lids every time his cock brushed against your sweet spot, earthquakes rocked your world, waves of pleasure crashed against each nerve under your skin. He set you aflame and quenched you in the same stroke.

You sang pretty moans for him, Giyuu joining you in the duet of passion the two of you shared. Skin rubbed against skin, sweat beaded at your brows, air was shared - Giyuu tilted his head and kissed you again, and again, and again.

He stole your heart, he stole your pleasure, he stole your breath, he stole you and yet…

“Let go for me, my dear-” he ground out between his teeth.

You went out with a whimper. 

Toes curled, back arched, but all you could do was take it as Giyuu continued to thrust, chasing his own release inside your heat.

He kept staring at your blissed out face. "I'm gonna-" One, two, three slams of his hips and he released a shaky moan, spilling his seed deep into your pussy. "…stuff you full of my love."

The warmth of him inside, the firm muscles against your thighs, his scent, the dripping sweat- 

He hadn't even asked if he could cum inside. He hadn't asked if you were on the pill. He truly intended to keep you, didn't he?

"I love you, my dear."

Tears welled up in your eyes and fell one by one down your cheeks. But damn him, you loved him too. You'd fallen in love with him, and he'd become your captor. 

Giyuu slowly leaned even closer to embrace you. “Shhh, this was meant to be, my dear.” He buried his face into your neck. The kiss he placed there was wet with his own tears.

What was he crying about? You were the one he was going to shackle down. You were the one with no way out. You were the one losing everything but him.

“I know this will take some time to adjust to.”

How else was he supposed to keep you from harm? There was no other way. He couldn’t regret it, wouldn’t regret it.

“In the end… all you have left is-” he leaned closer to your ear, “me.” Giyuu buried his face in your neck again, taking in your scent and listening to your heart beat - steady and well. Alive.

You were far safer with him, under his roof - in your now-shared bedroom.

“It’s better this way.”

There was nothing he wouldn’t do for you. He would make sure you had everything you needed.

“Shhh, sleep now.”

banners by the amazing @/benkeibear

[sakurapika]

How the landfolk do their hair

Author's note: This, along with my previous short story, "Rose-Tinted Ego," are from an Azurido fanfic I started writing a couple of months ago. I'm not sure if I'll finish it (it's over 11k words long and I'm not even halfway done with what I planned), so I decided to post excerpts of a few of the parts I like the best for now!

Context: Over winter break, the Queen is hosting a gala and has specifically requested for the Rosehearts family to attend. Mrs. Rosehearts has come to NRC to collect Riddle, who she hasn't spoken to for months. Azul volunteers to come with Riddle, claiming that he would like to take the chance to learn magic from the perspective of a different member of the Great Seven. Is he coming for his own gain, or is he making an excuse because he is concerned for Riddle? Who knows? Mrs. Rosehearts agrees, pleased with the idea of another NRC student (one from a different dorm, at that) looking up to her son. At this point in the story, the three are about to set off.

One final note: Brief mention about Azul's dieting and Mrs. Rosehearts being strict about food. It's very mild, but I'd rather not make anyone uncomfortable, just in case.

Azul was nothing if not prepared for nearly every possible scenario. Although being dragged along on a whirlwind trip with his academic rival and his academic rival’s mom was not something he anticipated this winter, he still had some basic plans. “Floyd,” he said while collecting four of his best pairs of shoes, “You must keep everyone outside of my office. Don’t touch any of my personal belongings, or else I’ll make a big batch of unagi nigiri out of you.”

“You’re going to play at kingyo-chan’s house?” Floyd threw himself at the edge of Azul’s bed and began to bounce. “Without us?”

“What did I just say about touching my personal belongings?”

“Well, teeeeechnically, your bed’s the property of Night Raven College.”

“Oh, you want to be a little smarty-pants right now?” Sighing, he turned to Jade leaning against the door of his bedroom. “Jade, you’re in charge. Keep your brother in check, will you?”

Jade nodded. “That goes without saying.”

As he finished collecting his clothes, he retrieved a lengthy document from a locked drawer in his desk and gave it to Jade. It contained every single contingency plan for how to operate the dorm in his absence. There shouldn’t be much of a problem, given that most of the students were away for the break. Jade was fairly experienced as a vice-housewarden, so he knew that he was reliable. Floyd was…Floyd. If he felt bored, he could burn down the dorm for his own amusement. Azul hoped that he’d at least find students in other dorms, like Scarabia, to terrorize before such a dreadful thought crossed his mind.

After they had finished packing, Mrs. Rosehearts had immediately sent for another ferry out of Sage’s Island. It was seldom that such boats came to the island during the off-season, but for a woman with status, anything was possible. Realizing that the journey was long, Azul was almost going to mention the fact that they could easily teleport by magic mirror.

“Don’t,” Riddle grabbed his arm and whispered, “Or she’ll make me visit more often.”

The ferry had dropped them off at the Cite des Fleurs in the Shaftlands; from there, they took a first-class train all the way to the Queendom of Roses. The train was fast and impressive, traveling both on land and through a series of underwater tunnels. In the meantime, the passengers were served a complimentary dinner.

When the waiter approached Azul, he had said, “It is our deepest pride and greatest honor to serve the finest foods in all of the Shaftlands--please, be our guest!”

The hospitality was certainly memorable; the tableware was enchanted, and the train waitstaff cast spells to make the spoons and forks dance and sing. Throughout the whole affair, Azul was fiercely taking mental notes. Could they pull off something like this in the Mostro Lounge? The food, however, was abysmal, but that was his own doing. He had spotted a million lovely dishes on the menu, and ended up with the simplest salad known to man and merfolk. By all means, the ingredients were fresh and the dressing was well-made, but Azul had eaten plenty of salads every day, and they all tasted like nothing at this point.

“See,” Mrs. Rosehearts remarked, pointing to Azul, “he’s eating something nutritious.”

Riddle pushed around a chunk of aubergine in his ratatouille. His own meal was made of vegetables. How much more healthy was it supposed to get?

Although he kept silent, Mrs. Rosehearts continued to berate him. “Look at you, you’re using the wrong fork. That’s a salad fork, not a dinner fork! Have you forgotten your dining etiquette? And your meal simply has too much oil in it. You know what? I’m telling the waitstaff!” 

Mrs. Rosehearts took Riddle’s plate and chased down one of the poor staff members as he made his way into the next train car. Riddle looked at Azul helplessly and said, “I could have sworn I picked up the right fork. See, look, my dinner fork is where my salad fork should be. Maybe something happened during the dinnertime show.”

He looked so helpless, like a boy who was lost to this world. For the millionth time that day, Azul surprised himself by speaking up. “You used the wrong fork, huh? You know, under the sea, we don’t really have forks, or spoons. We mostly eat things with our hands, fins, tentacles, by phagocytosis…you get the idea.”

“Really? How curious. Well, I suppose that’s the etiquette there.”

“Yes, that’s just how it is. I didn’t even have a chance to see how landfolk actually use forks until I immigrated to…erm, the land. I used to go to restaurants and treat forks like complimentary combs! I collected a few and would sometimes use them to comb my bangs like this," he gave an exaggerated demonstration of curling the ends of his seafoam-white hair. "Jade didn’t know any better and collected forks for me, but Floyd…oh, that sucker, he knew this whole time and didn’t say a word, no matter how many times people stared at me! He never bothered to say, 'hey Azul, that's not how the landfolk actually do their hair.' I would even sing to myself while sitting in front of the vanity…good grief.”

Riddle allowed himself a small smile. “Wow, my mother would see you a bit differently if she knew that.”

“Just a bit?”

“You’re right. She’d chuck you off this train if she could.”

They laughed together, just for a nice, long moment, until they grew self-aware. What were they doing here, two students from an elite school, who were constantly head-to-head on the exam leaderboards? They weren't even friends. Aside from discussing classwork once in a while and attending housewarden meetings, their paths seldom crossed. Why now did Azul have to be so involved in something so embarrassingly personal to Riddle, such as his family’s affairs?

[stevethehairington]

Ship game 24 and 27 please

ooh thank you!! these are fun ones!! 💕

24. What are their favorite places to kiss on their partner(s)? What are their favorite types of kisses?

LOVE THIS ONE!! okay. so. eddie absolutely LOVES to kiss steve's freckles and moles. it's his favorite thing to do. the ones on his cheek, just beside his nose. the little triangle of them on his neck. the spray of them across his shoulders and down his back. the ones on the inside of his knee, the underside of his thigh. given the chance, eddie will take his time to kiss each and every one of them. his favorite to kiss, though, is the couplet on steve's cheek. the very spot that eddie had stared at as he leaned in close and called steve "big boy". he'd nearly done it, nearly taken the plunge and kissed him there for the first time, but he'd thought better of it at the last second and held back. when he did finally get to kiss it for the first time, he was delighted by the pretty, rosy color that bloomed beneath the freckles and made them pop as steve blushed. now, every change he gets eddie will swoop in to press a kiss there.

(also, honorable mention to the inside of steve's thighs lol. whenever they're in the bedroom and eddie's got steve laid out against his bed, he LOVES to kiss the inside of his thighs. loves to press his lips to the soft, sensitive skin there, loves to bite at it and suck bruises like secrets and smooth them over with wet kisses, with gentle kiss, with adoring kisses.)

steve's favorite place to kiss eddie is his pulse point, right there against the side of his throat. he likes to sweep eddie's hair out of the way, to gather it and push it to the side so he can duck in and press his mouth to that sweet sweet spot. he likes to feel eddie's heartbeat beneath his lips, strong and steady and sure. alive. here.

27. Who would propose? What would their wedding be like?

actually, i think it would be really funny and also really sweet if they both wanted to propose to each other, sort of around the same time too. except i think it would play out like this:

i like to think that steve bought the ring, like, a year after they started dating. he'd been that in love, that sure of them. he, of course, held onto it for all this time, because he knew a year of dating was way too soon to be bringing up marriage, and he knew eddie had a rocky relationship with the idea of marriage because of his parents, and honestly, steve sort of did too. but he'd had this gut feeling, and eight years later, it was still there. still there and stronger than ever.

steve wants to do something really romantic for the proposal, something that will truly sweep eddie off his feet (even though he's already done that). he wants it to be memorable, thinks eddie deserves something just as grand as he is. so steve spends SO much time planning it. he recruits robin and nancy (and even considers asking some of the kids for advice, but even though they're pretty grown now, they still don't know how to keep secrets from each other, so that's out of the question, he can't risk eddie finding out) and he has them help him brainstorm something good. it takes some time, but he finally comes up with a plan — the perfect proposal.

except, three days before steve's plan is supposed to finally come to fruition, eddie ruins it.

it's late in the evening, and steve is in the bathroom running through his nightly routine. he's got his hair pushed back with a bright pink sweatband, some sort of clay face mask goop all over his face (it had been a gift from robin — she'd made it herself, said it did wonders for her skin), and he's just finishing brushing his teeth too.

eddie's in the bedroom, already in his pajamas, but he's on top of the bedsheets as he leans against the headboard of their bed and reads.

steve spits the toothpase out and rinses his mouth. he's still got a few more minutes until he's supposed to wash the face mask away, but he doesn't want to sit in the bathroom, bored, so he marches the short distance to the door and walks into the bedroom.

eddie doesn't look up from his book, not until steve flops onto the bed beside him, then wriggles his way closer and pushes eddie's book aside.

"hey, i was reading that," eddie protests, and he looks like he might complain a little more until his eyes land on steve, and he promptly bursts into laughter — the deep, full-bodied kind.

eddie twists to face steve, pushes a hand flat to his chest so he can press him to the mattress and props himself up on his elbow to hover above steve, squinting at his face. "oh my god, what is that?" he asks in between his snickering. he swipes a finger against steve's cheek and collects some of the green goop. he holds it up and eye it, then gives it a sniff. he wrinkles his nose.

steve frowns at him as best as he can through the mask. "quit it," he whines, as eddie wipes the clay onto the side of steve's arm. "it's from robin, she said it's good for my skin."

eddie drops his forehead to steve's chest, still laughing. "i'm sorry, i'm sorry. it's just— you look like slimer, man," he says, and laughs harder.

steve makes an indignant noise, but he's laughing too.

and then eddie picks his head up again, catching steve's eyes, and he's got this ridiculously fond look on his face, something warm and adoring sparkling in his eyes, and he's shaking his head, smiling so wide, and then, "marry me?"

the laughter dies in steve's throat, catching on a soft, sharp inhale, his eyes going wide. "what?" he asks.

eddie doesn't even falter. "marry me," he repeats, not so much a question this time. this time, as it is a declaration.

"eddie," steve breaths, and his heart skips in his chest. then, "eddie." it's a little petulant, a little miffed, and it makes eddie's face screw up, that insecurity clawing it's way up for the first time since the words slipped from his lips.

eddie rolls off of steve, takes his hands off of him. "i— is that— i don't— look, steve—"

but before he can start to apologize or, god forbid, rescind the offer, steve rolls onto him, pins him to the bed. "i can't believe you just asked me that," he says, and he smiles.

eddie's brow furrows, but the sight of steve smiling must reassure him that he's not upset by the question. "should i— should i not have asked you that?" he asks, and he looks so confused that steve kind of wants to laugh.

so he does. drops his head to eddie's chest, just like eddie had done to him before, and laughs. "no," steve says, shaking his head. "no you shouldn't have," he lifts his head so he can meet eddie's eyes again, "because i was going to ask you that first," he finally says.

it's eddie's turn to be surprised. "what?"

steve nods. "yeah, i was going to propose to you in a few days. i had— shit, i had this whole thing planned out." he laughs again. "it was going to be so good. you were going to love it. there's no way you wouldn't have said yes."

a bubbly sort of laugh spills from eddie's lips. "baby, i would've said yes any way you ask me," he tells steve, wrapping his arms around steve's middle.

"except i didn't get the chance to, you ass!" steve complains, swatting lightly at eddie's arm. "i can't believe you!"

"i beat you to the punch," eddie says, grinning. "you didn't give me an answer, though," he adds, trailing off. he looks at steve with expectant eyes.

steve rolls his, then sighs. "ask me again," he tells eddie.

so eddie does. "marry me?" he asks.

and the smile on steve's face grows. it grows so wide that the clay starts to crack, and a couple flaky pieces fall off. "yes," he whispers. "yes," he says, and he dives forward so he can kiss eddie senseless.

(and at some point a little bit later, after the proposal and the acceptance has been celebrated and the two of them are lying together in bed, eddie will take steve's hand, twine their fingers, rub his thumb over the knuckle of steve's left ring finger. then he'll take the single ring he wears on his right hand from his finger and he'll slide it onto steve's. he'll tell him that that ring was his mother's — not her wedding ring, but still hers. and now it's steve's. his two favorite people. they never got to meet, but they still get to share this. to share this ring and eddie's love.)

Ask Game for Ships!

[marjansmarwani]

20 Questions aka. Oversharing on the Internet version 92840938

Thanks for the tag @welcometololaland! Maybe reviewing all this will get me back in the writing spirit? 🤞

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

147

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

749,567

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently just Lone Star, but I do have a Midsomer Murders fic in progress too

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

A Puzzle I Love to Solve (911 LS)

Friends Like These (911 LS)

Brother (I will hear you call) (911 LS)

Where You Go, I Go (a 911/Lone Star crossover)

tender-hearted sadness pulls me through the day (911 LS)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to! I love reading them. andI try to respond, but lately (aka the past year or so) I just haven't had the bandwidth for it

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

While about 85% of my fics are angsty, most of them have a happy ending. But not all of them. The obvious answer for this question is shut your eyes and fall apart (the one where I kill TK), but I think that my 2x02 coda - heavy from the hurt inside my veins - is a stong contender, especially with Nancy's section ending the fic. Honorable mention to time can heal, but this won't a 1x08 coda in which Carlos blames himself for TK getting shot.

Still, 3 out of 147 isn't bad.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of them do, and it's too hard to pick one.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Occassionally. If I do it's usually pretty mild and easy to ignore. I've only gotten really nasty hate once.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I do not.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I don't usually, the closest I have gotten to a crossover is a fic from the show crossover.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of, but I have had an OC stolen "borrowed." That was weird to encounter in another fic.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Not as far as I know

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Once, and @justaswampdemon and I have one started. Someday we might finish it.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Tarlos has a very special place in my heart

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

At this point? Any of them.

But in reality, I have some AUs I doubt will ever get past the outline stage, as much as I would like to see them done

16. What are your writing strengths?

✨Angst✨ But also, characterization and pacing I think.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Smut.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I think I have done it once or twice, but I think it depends on why you are using it. If it makes sense and it's not being used in a sterotypical or insensitive or fetishining manner, then I typically say go for it. That being said, personally I would only do it with Spanish because that's the only other language I feel comfortable writing in.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

In peak early 2000s teen fashion, Harry Potter.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

I can never decide, so here's a few honorable mentions:

You Can Learn to Love (Again) - Teacher AU

you can't hide from time - the one where I created the 252 crew

why can't I hold on? - my gwyn fic

I promise you that it's worth the risk - Amnesia fic

I am not what you planned - Dr. Reyes/Paramedic Strand

would've loved you for a lifetime

no pressure tagging a few people: @reyesstrand @justaswampdemon @moviegeek03 @morganaspendragonss @detectivecarlosreyes @kiras-sunshine @sunshinestrand

[crying-fantasies]

JJBA Masterlist

Different Realities

Reality 1: Enters Smith/Shamandalie/Zeppeli!

Pretty much the original story buy with reader in it.

Reality 2: Eyes of Heaven

The story diverges almost enterily, everyone gets a happy ending to some point, everyone survives and have a bright future.

Reality 3: Without sacrifice there can be no victory

Everyone felt the pain seeying their destinies, could you change the flow of history itself just to save the people that you got to care and love? Would you give your life and soul away? Did you stop yourself to think if that is what they wanted?, or where reader dies to safe everyone else.

Reality 4: There is light at the end of the tunnel

Could you finally have your happy ever after?

Reality 5: Saint Mary

Where Mary Joestar didn´t die in that accident, her sole presence changes all the way of the story, or where you end up married to Dio.

JOJOS

Jonathan Joestar

Run out of love (Part 1)(Part 2)(Part 3)

Status: Coming soon

Sypnosis: You loved him since the very first moment but decided to keep it to yourself, what would happen if you finally told him what your heart wanted to yell at him after so long?

Warning: Heart break, repressed emotions, angst (what´s new?), friends to lovers to strangers.

Joseph Joestar

1936´s winter

Status: Complete

Sypnosis: Some could say that you two reflected the bitter pair that never said what they wanted back in that cold winter, but those same words would be expressed years later by your own blood in a bizarre summer day.

Jotaro Kujo

The Star and The Love (Act 1)(Act2)(Act 3)(Act 4)

Status: Mini series Ongoing

Sypnosis: A little puppet show, one that shows that in many realities Jotaro decides to finish what he couldn´t even start and Star Platinum ends up showing what a broken heart looks like.

Warnings: Heart break, repressed emotions, angst.

Author notes: This takes place in reality 1, 2 and 3.

Keep Going (Let them go) (Will you?)

Status: Complete

Sypnosis: It was a sacrifice that he didnt ask for, it was happines that he didnt want to begin with, it was such a sorrow that he didn`t wish for anyone.

Warnings: Continuation on "Where is your soul" in Jotaro`s route, death, blood, description of body horror and massacres.

Josuke Higashikata

1999´s summer

Status: Ongoing

Sypnosis: Some could say that you two just were the typical young summer love confession, but you also admitted what others could never say back in a cold winter night almost 60 years ago.

SERIES (One character)

Walk with me (on this flowering path of fire and blood)

Status: Work in progress

Pairing: Dio Brando x reader

Synopsis: Your marriageable age finally comes to knock on your door, everyone expected the announcement of your engagement to Jonathan Joestar, but when he declines that same proposal in front of half nobility the Joestar family needs to save face and also save your honor, so in order to have you married into the Joestar family like it was planned both families go for plan B: where a pretty much aggravated Dio has to take the hand in marriage of a very much discomforted you.

Or in where you and Dio end up married, or in a world where Mary Joestar is still alive and Dio ends being less fucked up thanks to her.

Warnings: Arranged marriage, hurtful words, maybe too honest words without filter, Dio being a bitch in occasions (what's new?) Jojo being the honest to a fault meathead that he sometimes is, implied infidelity (not really), mention of guns and their use.

SERIES (Multi character)

What Am I to You? (JoJo pt1-pt5) (JoJo pt6-pt8)

Status: Complete

Synopsis: How they saw you, did they love you? Did they only liked you as a friend? Did they at least noticed?

Different kinds of love: JJBA Edition

Warnings: Heart breakdown, Unrequited feelings, character´s death, spoilers.

I Will Repeat All Again, Just Stay By My Side

Status: Complete

After Eyes of Heaven events...

Synopsis: In a present that was different, different choices were made, and so a different future is ahead.

Warnings: Spoilers of Eyes of Heaven, Canon divergence, character's death, the so called "good ending" (If you find my tears it's because, for me, this is how it all ended in the real show, I will die on this hill).

Though the chains of destiny may bind you...

Though you may be fated to fight...

Know that a noble heart is as strong as diamond...

And as free as golden wind in the sky...

Though you may be imprisoned in a sea of stone...

You can keep walking towards the light...

There's always a blessing waiting in the wings, and as...

Many signposts to guide you as there are stars in the sky... Go now, and journey beyond the stars!

Where Is Your Soul? (JoJo pt1-pt5) (JoJo pt6-pt8)

Status: Completed

Synopsis: Everyone can live, everyone can have a future, a brighter one if you give up your own.

Warnings: Character's death, suicide thought, self-sacrifice, angst, dismembered body, blood, mention of sexual assault, if you don't like this don't read, it's just me searching for some pain.

You and Me, in a Different Way (pt. 1) (pt. 3-4) (pt.5-6) (pt. 7-8)

Synopsis: Stands are the reflection of your soul, they show want you try to hide or feel, how do their Stands react to you or your own Stand? How would they react to your child, the combination of your bodies and souls?

Warnings: implied childbirth, parenthood and some problems that come with it, self doubt, very old music, some fluff.

[fluffypotatey]

Operation Merthur: Part 1

“You want me to do what?”

Malifer sighed. He really didn't want to repeat this again. Pinching the bridge of his nose, Malifer straightens his posture. He isn’t paid enough for this.

“Sire, I’ve told you this ten times.”

“Yes, yes, I understand that. But...why?”

The poor knight looked so confused and caught off guard. Fair. They did corner him with this request. Maybe Malifer should’ve gone to Sir Gwaine first. That knight always seemed more inclined to give them favors. But this was a special request. One that is not in Sir Gwaine’s jurisdiction. 

“We only ask, sire, is for you to ask His Majesty about...his opinions on his manservant.” Malifer prays for the first time in his life for Sir Leon to not ask him to repeat this request again. “See, we are only asking for the benefit of our dear friend, Merlin. Just in case, you know?”

Sir Leon's eyebrows furrow at the mention of Merlin’s name, but he still looked uncomfortable. Malifer understood why. Sir Leon was always a man who went by the book; very meticulous and always noble to a point that it was a little infuriating. Although, in Malifer’s humble opinion, Sir Lancelot takes the cake on being infuriatingly noble, but Sir Leon is second just for him always feeling the need to be so...virtuous. Great, now Mailer felt like gagging.

Fortunately, Charlie (think of him as Malifer’s second in command) saves Malifer from making a fool of himself in front of the knight. He wraps his arm around Malifer as an act of nonchalance. It’s an act mostly because they need Sir Leon to agree to this request for their plan to get in motion, and there was only so much a couple of nosy servants could do to meddle in the affair of something as important as this. 

“We don’t want you to…snoop, per say. More of”— Charlie made some kind of gesture with his free hand— “investigate the affairs of His Majesty’s heart. We understand that you are a very honorable man held by your code and by no means are we asking you to do anything treasonous.”

“I understand that,” Sir Leon gruffs. It seems this topic has made him flustered. Malifer is seriously ready to call it quits and ask Gwaine. “It’s just...don’t you think this is an invasion of privacy? I feel like we should just leave them to figure out themselves.”

Malifer groans. This isn’t going anywhere. Why did he think he could convince the ever virtuous Sir Leon into joining this operation? New plan: ask Gwaine and pray it works.

“Listen, Sire.” Malifer makes sure to stretch the sire out a bit to let the knight know how annoyed he is becoming. Merlin is a bad influence when it comes to decorum and proper etiquette. “In case you have been blind for four years, let me inform you that there has been no progress between those two imbeciles!”

The knight flinches at Malifer, referring to his two friends with such a name, but Malifer never gives him the chance to defend them.

“I don't know about you, but I am getting sick and tired of seeing them give each other those disgusting dopey eyes. Not to mention the amount of hours I have to hear Merlin talk about the King’s arms, face, hair, and--God forbid his fucking eyes, everyday--and always giving that sickly, sweet smile! I can’t take it, Sir Leon! And if you won't help me, I’ll meddle in these affairs by myself!”

He finishes looking straight at the knight. His chest rising and falling as he recollects himself. Charlie seemed to have grabbed him during his rant to ensure Malifer didn’t get all up on the knight’s face, but the damage was done. 

Sir Leon was at a loss for words. His face said it all. The shock was only a dream that vanished and his face became blank. Leon pursed his lips and crossed his arms. He looks back to the duo.

“You said you and some servants have created a whole operation?”

Now we’re getting somewhere.

-

Operation Get These Dumbasses Together (Gwaine coined the name Merthur but Malifer thinks it’s a stupid name and quite likes its original title, thank you very much) was a work in progress. It was actually an accident on how this operation got started. It was...after the whole fiasco with Mercia and Merlin being poisoned, if Malifer wants to really start at the beginning. 

Anyway, Merica had come for a treaty signing thing (Malifer isn’t exactly one who kept up with things like this, gossip was more up his alley), and everything went to shit the moment Merlin accused Mercia of trying to poison prince Arthur. Of course a servant accusing another kingdom of such an act was laughable and caused some arguments until King Uther (may his soul be forever facing its crimes in the afterlife) ordered Merlin to drink from said poisoned drink because who gives a shit about a servant’s life? Not Uther that’s for sure.

Prince Arthur did though, and would have drank it in Merlin’s stead, but of course that wasn’t going to happen. To sum it up, the cup was poisoned. Merlin, in critical condition of dying, was not doing so hot anymore. Prince Arthur, who had only known Merlin for...was it really only a month?! Wow. Anyway, Prince Arthur left Camelot (against his own father’s wishes) to find some flower to save Merlin. 

This, my friends, was the beginning of Malifer and Charlie’s delve into meddling in affairs they probably should have stayed out of.

It started out as a joke. Honestly, Charlie really was joking:

“Apparently, Prince Arthur left Camelot to save his servant.”

“Did he?” asked Malifer who was stuck cleaning the kitchens and missed all the drama much to his discontent.

“Yeah, it was really dramatic. Seems that the only way for Merlin to survive is to find this...flower of some sort? But the King was against the prince going to fetch it since, well,” Charlie’s face darkened as he remembered hearing the King’s exact words on how he felt about the servant’s fate. Such was the life of servants under Uther’s reign. Don’t be seen, don’t be heard, and never expect royalty to give a rat’s ass about you. Malifer stops his cleaning to face Charlie and his face falls grim in understanding. He reaches to squeeze Charlie’s shoulder. 

“Poor Merlin,” Malifer whispers, “he was quite a firecracker wasn’t he?”

Charlie snorts. He relaxes his shoulders then. 

“But the prince still left?”

Charlie smirks. “Yeah, went against his old man just to save his servant’s life.” A pause. “It must be love.”

Malifer chuckles at that. As if. It still made him smile. The prince and his manservant. Huh. The prince in love with his manservant.

The Prince...in love?

“HOLY SHIT!”

And that friends, is how Malifer dragged Charlie along to spy on the couple at whatever chance they could. Soon, Charlie’s stablehand friend, David joined, adding his own theories. Clara came next, then Greg, then Sean, then Maddox, then Mary, then...every single servant was in on this once small operation. A betting pool was made a month later. 

“I’m telling you! Gwen and Merlin are very close, so maybe—”

“Don’t even suggest that!”

“He did accuse himself of sorcery to save her life that one time,” someone murmured.

Silence.

“Goddamnit, Stephen!”

“What? It’s true! Prince Arthur even said so!”

“Oh please, can we really trust the prince for something like this? He could have assumed wrong and gotten jealous for no reason!”

“Merlin is very adamant on them being friends.”

“See! False alarm everyone.”

“But...don’t some people just say that because they’re in denial?”

Groans echo around the kitchen, their designated place to discuss and plan. A new pairing is added to the chalkboard under Arthur x Morgana (this of course would be later erased after the Lady is revealed to be Prince Arthur’s half sister). Grumbling ensues and later Merlin x Morgana is added as well as Merlin x Lancelot. That last one had a bit more of an uproar but was still added since it was mentioned (fucking Stephen) that Merlin forged Lancelot’s nobility and Arthur was totally jealous of Merlin’s attention not on him (bless you Mary).

When the servants found out about Gwaine, well…

“I asked Merlin about his last adventure with the prince and it seems he was very soft spoken about this stranger named Gwaine,” Melody told Malifer. 

“Really? Soft spoken how?”

“From what I heard, he helped them during a brawl in the tavern—” of course he did— “and got injured. Apparently, he’s staying in Gauis’s care which means he is staying with Merlin”

Melody looked pleased with her deduction. Malifer was not. This could put a damper on the operation’s plans, so Malifer went to find him on the excuse of curiosity.

When Malifer did meet Gwaine, he found him very charming. Gwaine was courteous, fun, and incredibly likable. Malifer felt a tinge of guilt over his quick dislike of such a charming man. He had half a mind to get Gwaine to join the operation.

Unfortunately, Gwaine’s stay didn’t last long, but it was fun while it lasted. In honor of such a charming man, the operation agreed to keep the pairing between Gwaine and Merlin since, admittedly, they would be a good pair for one another.

Skipping a couple more years, (after Morgana’s fall, Uther’s death, and other events) we find ourselves back to the present with Arthur as king, the Knights of the Round Table established, and there is still no progress on those two dunderheads.

However, that doesn’t stop those two from being so disgustingly cute. Malifer sometimes catches a glimpse of King Arthur’s longing looks, touches that stay longer than Charlie would consider “friendly,” and that fucking dopey smile. The servants know very well that Merlin is head over heels. Malifer is actually surprised that they have kept this operation secret from Merlin for so long. 

It’s actually Gwen that Malifer has to thank for that. She’s been in this operation for three years and knows front and center how far gone her poor friend is. It’s also Gwen who gives Malifer the idea of asking Sir Leon for help in these trying times.

-

“So, how did it go?” Malifer asks after Leon enters their agreed meeting spot to share information. He won’t ever admit it to Leon’s face, but having Leon agree to help Operation Merthur (fucking Gwaine) was a Godsend. At this point, Malifer was grasping at the seams because he, as well as every other inhabitant in this kingdom, knew Merlin’s feelings for KIng Arthur and he knew the feelings were reciprocated. Unfortunately, intuition isn’t enough to convince said manservant to confess his feelings (not to mention Malifer is in no way able to ask that of the king being as Malifer has never conversed with him).

“The general meeting we had went well,” Malifer rolled his eyes, “but the minute I asked about him courting anyone, he got agitated.”

Interesting. 

“This could mean one of many things you know.”

Leon then rolls his eyes at Malifer. Well then, sorry for stating the obvious. “I’m well aware of that, so I pressed on.”

“And?” Malifer raises his brow. What is with knights and theatrics?

“And, well,” Leon coughed his cheeks looking a bit more pink than usual. “And well, he’s not courting anyone, but then he started venting about the...silliness of Kings being expected to court someone so soon.” Malifer has a sneaking suspicion that the king didn't say silly, but he nodded along. The king ranting is good. He could let anything slip that he would usually keep well hidden, and this is Sir Leon, King Arthur’s most trusted knight and childhood friend. “He then goes on to say how he has too much on his plate,” Understandable, “and technically he’s not really interested because…”

Malifer frowns at the sudden pause and looks up to Sir Leon (why does he have to be so tall?). His mouth is shaped in a circle. Realization flashes in his eyes. Malifer huffs and crosses his arms.

“Because…?” He taps his foot while he waits for Leon to come back from wherever his mind went. Malifer stares while he waits (he has nothing better to do, really). Sir Leon isn’t wearing his armor today which is a little odd to see since that’s all Malifer has ever seen him in, but it's not...terrible. To be honest, the armor hid a lot of the muscles Sir Leon appears to have. His arms are also crossed so it’s easier to see the muscles flexed there and-- okay! Time to get back on track and not think any more about Leon’s arms, thighs, chest, neck….fuck.

Malifer clears his throat and that seems to get Leon’s attention again. He blinks at Malifer who’s now a little more than flustered to be held under the knight’s gaze. Maifer shuffles his feet and averts his eyes anywhere but at Leon.

“Well?”

Leon coughs and straightens up. “Right. Well, he said he wasn’t interested in courting any lady’s because, well, he stopped himself there. But I think it's probably because he was going to say that it’s because he’s already interested in someone.”

Malifer’s eyes widen and he smiles. Finally! 

“And he’s not courting them?”

“No, it seems not.”

“Hm,” Malifer smirks, “I wonder why is that?”  

Leon smiles. It softens his features. It makes him look-- Malifer shakes his head. That’s not the important thing here. The important thing is that Arthur is interested in someone, but won’t court them.

“Maybe it’s because they aren't technically noble?” He ponders mockingly.

Leon nods but his smile stays firm on his face since he is in on the game. “And this person may not exactly be a lady.”

“But it is very close to him for him to be that flustered.”

They grin at each other, proud they both reached the same conclusion.

“Merlin?” Leon’s eyes twinkle with mischief that Malifer has never seen on the knight before.

“Oh most definitely.”

-

That evening, Malifer wasn’t stuck in the kitchen (Charlie was and had half a mind to murder Malifer for throwing him under the bus to escape the cook’s wrath) and was enjoying himself. He interacted with the other servants, chatted with Gwaine and Percival on the importance of sleeves (“I’m telling you, Perce. It wouldn’t hurt, and someone might try to attack them since there’s no protection.” A huff. “I would get to them first.” “Perce, please.”), and watched the king and his servant float around each other. 

Seriously, it was like they were in their own world or something. 

Merlin went to pour some water for Leon, who was next to King Arthur, but then Merlin must have said something to cause the king to tug on Merlin’s scarf pulling him eye to eye with himself. They gazed at each other for a while, forgetting that Leon was even there. Malifer saw his shoulders slump as he grabbed the pitcher to pour his own cup (it was not water). Malifer shakes his head in sympathy for the poor knight.

When the king finally let Merlin go, Malifer caught Leon’s eye and the knight only shrugged in response to Malifer’s raised eyebrow. The king seemed to catch their interaction and frowned looking between the two. He leaned in to say something that Malifer wouldn’t be able to hear. Whatever it was, it caused Sir Leon to flush profusely and hide his face in his cup while the king laughed. Malifer tilted his head in confusion then shrugged. It’s probably none of his business.

-

The next day saw Malifer's second plan go into motion: breaking Merlin. Many have tried to get him to admit his feelings, but all have failed. However, this can only work with the help of Lady Guinevere and Gaius, the royal physician. 

Malifer doesn’t know the royal physician personally, but he does know Gwen thanks to her lovely contribution to the Operation. With Gwen's help, they should be able to convince Gaius to help them in reaching their goal.

On the way to the physician’s chambers Gwen is skipping and humming in excitement while Malifer is shaking with nerves. It shouldn’t be that hard. It's Gaius, and Gwen assured Malifer that Gaius would definitely be all for this plan. While his mind is running through different scenarios on how this will pan out, he doesn’t notice someone else coming down the hallway and walks straight into metal. Fucking knights.

“Are you alright? Malifer?”

Malifer’s nose twitches as he looks up to who’s talking. Of course. Sir Leon in all his armor glory. He looks down at Malifer (seriously, Malifer isn’t that short!) his face looking concerned. Malifer’s nose twitches (winces really) again and he goes to touch it. 

“I’m fine,” he says, then winces after touching his nose. Leon frowns.

“I beg to differ.”

“Well, it sucks to suck. I’m fine, really.”

Leon still looks unconvinced but sighs as if resigned. Malifer reasons it must be because he knows other people who do the same thing.

“If you say so.”

Malifer’s lips purse. The nerve. He said he was fine. Leon doesn’t have to be concerned. He sniffs indignantly then regrets it.

“Well, I ran into you anyway, so...I’ll be careful next time.”

Leon chuckles. “I hope so.” His gaze stays fixed on Malifer and now he feels caught. Thankfully, Gwen comes to the rescue (bless her, really).

“We're sorry to have bumped into you. Anyway, we were on our way to see Gaius and it’s best to get to him before his work begins.” She gently nudges Malifer to follow her up to Gaius’s chambers. Malifer looks back to see Leon wave with a soft smile on his face. Malifer can feel his lips widen as he waves back.

“At least we now have an excuse to see him urgently,” Gwen says, but her eyes hold mischief in them. Malifer frowns. He doesn’t like where this is going.

“So.” Malifer can feel the floor escape from his feet as she turns to face him. He looks away. “You’re blushing.”

His head snaps back to her. “I am not!”

“Mhm, sure. So….” Malifer groans, already knowing where Gwen is going. “You and Sir Leon seem to be friendly.”

Malifer huffs and crosses his arms (he seems to be doing that alot). “Of course we are! He’s in on the plan. Just, he’s just here to help us get Arthur’s side just like how we’re using Gaius for Merlin! I mean, he’s not a bad guy. Isn’t snobby like some nobles and knights I know. I mean, he's no Gwaine but you know what I mean.”

“Oh? Gwaine?”

Malifer thinks his face just exploded. That’s not what he meant, and she knows that.

“I-I...I meant he’s not as down to earth as Gwaine. Gwaine’s charming, but he’s not my type.”

“And your type is…?”

Was it really taking this long to get to Gaius’s chambers? Gwen said they were close some minutes ago. He looks around avoiding Gwen and his obvious blush. He finds a sign to the chambers not long after and gives out a sigh of relief.

“Come on, the physician’s chamber is this way. I would like to get my nose treated, thank you very much.”

Gwen sighs and follows him up the stairs. Hoping that Gaius will help them in their plan.

-

“Of course I will!” Gaius exclaims.

Well, that was easy.

Gwen smiles and thanks Gaius while he continues to treat Malifer’s nose. He winces a couple of times but other than that he can feel his nose starting to recover.

“I’ve been living with that boy long enough to get tired of his obvious pining and the King-” Gaius rolls his eyes, “-I’ve been taking care of him since he was a little boy. Both of them are quite the pair aren’t they?”

Gwen and Malifer nod in agreement. Nobody is blind when it comes to seeing King Arthur and Merlin’s affections for one another. Now with Gaius’s help, they could find a way to speed up the torturous pining that this kingdom has been suffering from.

“So, what’s the plan?”

Malifer begins to explain his and other’s findings, as well as what Leon has been telling him. Gaius nods along and begins to share his own ideas. Gaius seems against anything that would be surrounded following Merlin, but concedes to confronting Merlin on confessing. Gwen adds that Arthur could be confronted on the fact of why he isn’t inclined to court anyone. 

It’s while they are in their hushed conversation that a tired Merlin enters the chambers. Gaius notices first and opens his mouth to greet him, but something weird happens. Malifer, who could have sworn that his eyes were deceiving him, watched as Merlin's eyes glowed gold and the chair near the shelf covered in potions moved closer to Merlin. Once it’s behind him, Merlin collapses on top of it. Malifer’s jaw drops.

“Merlin!” Gaius hisses. That seems to wake up the servant (no, sorcerer). He dazedly looks up at Gaius and smiles, raising his hand up to wave but freezes. It seems he notices Gwen and Malifer now. His smile falls.

“Well,” Malifer says, eyes still wide, “this complicates things.”

part 2

[gaslightgallows]

Hello! For the fanfic asks: 😈✅

Thank you!!!

😈 Has there been a point in a story where you did something just to be playfully mean to your readers?

Ohhh… I don't think so? Nothing's really springing to mind. There have been times where I stuck to my planned roadmap for a fic, against the wishes of some readers, but that's not quite the same thing.

✅ What’s something that appears in your fics over and over and over again, even if you don’t mean to?

Bathing scenes. As in, one person is taking a bath and their partner/best friend is sitting next to the tub, keeping them company, talking to them, usually reassuring them after some sort of stressful/traumatic event, possibly washing their hair or back. (It's about The Trust and The Intimacy, y'see.) I don't think this actually appears in much that I've posted (apart from Creatures of Stillness, which is… notable for this), but @meldanya44 can confirm that it turns up in a LOT of offline stuff. (I haven't posted much in the last couple of years and my style/themes have evolved, but this feels like it's stayed consistent. XD)

Honorable mention because I usually take this out before the fics get finished and posted, but I have a VERY hard time not giving characters offspring. I don't even like babyfic! What I like is continuance and massive family trees and exploring generational trauma. But that usually ends up veering very far away from a) the point of the fic and b) the actual canon of the piece of media I'm writing about, so out the offspring come. (Recent fandoms I've excised children from fic for: Miss Fisher's Murder Mysteries, The Magnus Archives, Good Omens. And Dark Shadows, but the offspring is staying in those fics because that show is already about massive family trees and generational trauma.)

Send me a fanfic ask!

[inkofamethyst]

April 24, 2023

The expectation of perfection is what got me to where I am, but it is, unfortunately, an impossible standard to reach.  One that becomes both harder to maintain and harder to relinquish with time.  (I am overreacting.  I forgot the deadline for one (1) online quiz assignment in cell bio which is entirely graded on participation and now I can’t even get partial credit EVEN THOUGH I LITERALLY FINISHED IT LONG BEFORE IT WAS DUE but I just didn’t submit it for some reason?? like an idiot gaaaAHHhhh this is even worse than forgetting to do the assignment altogether oh my god.  All I want is an A in this class so I can graduate with latin stinking honors (because for whatever reason my uni’s cutoffs are way higher than everywhere else’s it seems) and wear that special stupid special tassel and these dumb quizzes were easy points to buffer any “poor” exam performance (for the record, I have gotten an A+ on the two previous exams, but who knows what the third one might bring (ahem, I suspect Ctrl+F will be just as useful but WHO KNOWS)) but now I just have to be way more careful (it’s really funny to write this, actually, because I’ll read this back in a few years, smile, shake my head, and recognize that this is a very small thing in the grand scheme of things to be pressed about, like, odds are, I’m going to be just fine, I’m just feeling my feelings very intensely right now).)

And along similar lines, I also recognize that it is unreasonable to consider my attendance at the conference a failure based on the fact that I could not complete one singular goal despite the many, many positive things I did while I was there (I learned (so much)!  I caught up with friends/peers/colleagues/mentors (and made new ones)!  My presentation went well!), but I feel like a failure because I didn’t manage to introduce myself to the one person I knew I wanted to meet.  I had a plan and everything, but the singular dude I wanted to meet didn’t stay in the room after his talk so I lost him entirely.  I memorized his outfit and everything on the off chance I missed him after the session and I literally didn’t see him the entire rest of the day.  It’s like... I’m an adult and I couldn’t handle finding and introducing myself to one person?  Unreasonable amounts of self-doubt and disappointment are creeping in :/ (Realistically and logically, anything could have happened to make it so that we were somehow never in the same spaces at the same times, and this is unnecessary pressure to put on myself, but, as I mentioned before, I have these terribly high expectations (Great Expectations, if you will) and might be crushing myself under their weight.)

Anyway, I just feel a little out of control again, today.  And the worst part is that Life is just like this.  All the time.  I cannot expect to be in control of everything that will impact me.  Hate that.

But yeah.  The conference was good.  Not much to say on that front, really.  A little less exciting than last year’s (March 27, 2022) because it wasn’t my first and I was also presenting on something that I didn’t care that much about (the topic was interesting! just not a field I see myself going into, really).  Very thankful that I knew more people this time, though I still felt like enough of a relative baby in the discipline to feel really awkward while walking around sometimes.  It was nice to be invited out to places though :)

Thankful for the opportunity to attend a national conference two years in a row and present there as an undergraduate.  Invaluable opportunity.  Also thankful that I didn’t have to pay for travel or lodging because my current research advisor had enough funding to handle it for me.  Also also thankful to have not been the only student from my uni this year!!!  Also also also thankful that my current research advisor is a genuinely caring person and fought for us to all get home on time when our travel plans ran into trouble.

Can’t wait to present again at my uni so I can be done with this topic once and for all (and this upcoming presentation will be so much easier in comparison bc I won’t be surrounded by literal experts (I had like two literal experts come up to me and pester me (it wasn’t mean lol I actually really appreciated their input and poignant questions, as afraid of them as I was))).  I really am more of a bones girlie anyway.

Lastly, I mustered up my courage and wore a long skirt today!!  It’s one of the ones I thrifted (and it’s a lil busted in some places ngl), and I got a lot of compliments on it today which was lovely :)  I still need a slip, but this was a start.

[edit, one hour later: AAAAA ALSO ONLY THREE MORE WEEKS OF SCHOOOOOOL]

[ren-c-leyn]

Happy STS Ren! Okay so wait, there are TWO new champion duos in the Forgotten Gods universe?👀 A chaotic siren goddes and stuffy champion and a stuffy god with a chaotic champion? That sounds so cool! Would those two belong to the same story? Any more details about the characters? 👀 And a writing update so I don't miss on any cool project thoughts if any come around^^

@writingonesdreams

 Dreams! :D Always good to hear from you <3 You always have the best questions.

 Starting with your writing update since it is the quickest - Hope you enjoy the ramble @writingonesdreams

 I have been buckling down on Shackles of Time. I knocked out the final chapter of The Stormy Road Ahead arc! Just need to rewrite and schedule the last two chapters of that arc, and it’ll finished up in December. Then, I started a new word document with the next arc - A Prayer from the Past. It’s the first arc featuring the new team - Drusilla + her familiar, Lucien, and Azalea.

 You’ll be excited to know that their story is going to take them to a place from one of the first Shackles of Time rambles you got out of me - The Ivory Moon Island. The floating island with a temple to the moon God, and they’re also looking for a character whose been mentioned from the very beginning of the story but hasn’t made her grand appearance - Riya. So it’s all looping back together ^^ It’s like a dream come true! I get to drag in another of my legendary hero charries and run a team through a floating island ruin. *happy screaming*

 I’ll be alternating the teams’ arcs from this point forward, and will be adding occasional mini arcs like an important date for Glenn and Zephyr, some Time Keeper and Wyndulin scenes, ect. My goal is to keep the original trio at the main focus of the story, but plot elements have demanded a second team to start exploring some of the threads that I need to bring to the surface but didn’t make sense for the main trio to be involved in.

 Now onto your question -

 Yes, there are two more duos, but they are entirely unrelated stories since they are in different parts of the world. Actually the Siren Goddess’s black sea is on another continent entirely from the rest of the champions :D

 So for the original pair, the chaotic champion and serious god - This is the least developed pair at the moment. I’m only getting small snippets for them.

 I’m thinking that the champion is young, late teens early twenties, and has been in trouble for pretty much his entire life. I don’t think he really has a family, though the exact circumstances surrounding that are still a mystery to me.

 I’m thinking that someone finally got tired of it, maybe a priestess, and dragged him to the local temple of the God, I’m not entirely sure on domain yet but I’m thinking something along the lines of Honor and Valor, a God favored by warriors and like town guards; and so in an effort to turn this kid’s life around, the God decides to make him a champion.

 The problem with this plan is is now this chaotic little gremlin has magic powers and can do even more chaos, so babysitting the champion has become a full-time job for this poor God and their priestess, lol. I imagine it’ll be a story where we get to see a lot of direct interference from the God of the champion’s life, maybe even a quest in a desperate attempt to try and get this kid on the right track. The Siren Goddess and her champion - This one I do have more solidified and fleshed out, though I’m debating on if it’ll become spicy or if I want to keep the adult content out. It’d be something entirely new for me to write something spicy, but it would fit the theme of the Goddess in question. I guess we’ll see when I get there.

 The champion is a woman who is fleeing her past to another continent via ship. Everything in the journey goes smoothly until we reach the black sea. Singing starts catching everyone’s attention, a haunting bewitching song. The crew starts to panic and a storm starts brewing. The woman and other passengers don’t know what’s going on. The ship goes down and the singing gets stronger. Some even fall under it’s spell and start diving down. The woman is dragged under and is face to face with a siren who is pushing her down deeper and deeper into the waters while singing a different song. She’s struggling and fighting but as her vision is going dim, she starts to see something, someone else.

 The Siren Goddess makes her a champion, and when she wakes up, she’s on a blue sandy beach, the only survivor of the ship wreck, and every once in awhile she swears she hears faint singing on the breeze and wicked laughter in her ear.

 I think that there’s also a priest of the siren goddess, trying to guide her down their path, and I think that the story will be the struggle of her trying to fight her way tooth and nail onto her own path while the Siren Goddess of the Black Sea tries to drag her into her fold. It’s a push and pulling turbulent dynamic with corruption and temptation.

 That’s all I have on them at the moment. I’m keeping them vague until I know which story is coming next.

 Thanks for stopping by! I hope you have a lovely day/evening.

[daylandeangelo]

TOP TEN THINGS? MAYBE.

I don't really think categorizing my apples and my oranges by which are better is a very useful exercise. However, making lists is fun and reflecting is fun. So that's what I'm going to do here. This was originally going to be a list of top ten games of the year but I don't want anyone thinking I'm a gamer so I'm adding in ALL forms of art that I have consumed with my little brain. This year was filled with misery, but at least the art produced was good. So let's just get right to it.

HONORABLE MENTIONS

Okay. I am already cheating. And I will certainly cheat again later, but for now I want to throw some stuff in this section that I don't feel quite comfortable ranking in my mind because either I haven't finished them or there is some external psychic force preventing me from making a proper judgment.

THE LEGEND OF ZELDA: TEARS OF THE KINGDOM

Hey so. I didn't beat this game. I put like, 70-90 hours into it and completed exactly 1 temple. So, if I do the math there, that will be roughly a 400 hour game at this pace. I doubt it gets that crazy, but I do plan on playing this game for years to come so there's really no reason to try and chug it or force it on a list that I don't wanna put it on. It basically takes everything about Breath of the Wild and elevates it by a step or five, depending on the area. This one seems to have a much better fleshed out story too, so that's pretty cool. I will be making off putting contraptions and patrolling around the seemingly infinite depths for some time to come. Yippie! :)

BALDUR'S GATE 3

I did beat this one. Ruh oh. This would probably have made the top ten in some universe, and that universe is one where it didn't take me nearly 200 hours to complete it ONCE due to progression blocking bugs, character arc bugs, and so on and so forth. I am very tolerant of bugs and such, and I wouldn't say this is a bad game because of them by any means but I also can't pretend my experience, particularly in act 3, wasn't hampered by things either not working or not being fleshed out for one reason or another. I often play games like these for narrative or at the very least characters, so when that stuff starts actively breaking at the seams I start getting a little anxious. At certain points, it was hard to tell what was intended and what wasn't due to the jank of some of the narrative stuff towards the end.

I still love this game, I still will be playing this game, but I eagerly await the next couple of patches in hopes that they not only fix some of the bugs, but give more satisfying narratives to some of the party members who seem to just kind of get left by the wayside writing wise. Also I don't think the main story is very well fleshed out, personally. There is so much good writing in this game, but I think that most comes from the 'side' paths. The peak of the game, for me, personally was 'the' house in act 3. Legitimately incredible stuff.

Oh, also, I haven't played durge yet so maybe that would have put this higher on my personal list. Who knows.

STARFIELD

At one point I thought this might be my game of the year, or whatever. I haven't really cooled on it, per se, I simply don't think I've explored enough of the questlines yet to get a comfortable read on the whole thing. With Bethesda games, I find it hard to quantify how good or 'okay' they are until a few characters are made and a few routes are taken. Just personal preference, y'know.

That being said I think this game is a step up from Fallout 4 in almost every single way. No voiced protagonist, wildly different ways to TALK as your character, better writing, the list goes on and on.

I think Starfield does suffer from being a little to... sterile. It's a taste thing, sure, but Bethesda is going for a much more 'down-to-earth' version of space, which I know might not sit well with some people. I do think this has become the dogpile game of the year (because there always has to be one!) which makes criticizing the game, uh, not fun! There have been so many bad faith conversation points around this game that I don't even wanna say something mild like 'the companions are kind of weak overall' or whatever. It's a little tiresome!

That being said if you're in the mood for a Bethesda game with a slightly different flavor of exploration, this scratches that itch. It's very meditative in some ways, very interesting in others. There really isn't a game like it. You get in what you put out, I'd say.

DEAD SPACE

One that nearly got lost in the early year shuffle, especially considering another survival horror remake was right around the corner. But I HAVE to give this game it's due. A game that, by all accounts, didn't sound overly promising. I discounted any looks at the early footage, because I have half a brain and know how game development works, but I was still skeptical. After EA destroyed its own franchise, here it came—with a remake by a different studio. I try not to be cynical, but in this instance I was.

What I got was a polished, incredibly reimagined, and spruced up version of the original Dead Space that—to me—puts it nearly on par with Dead Space 2, one of my favorite games ever made. They heft of the weapons, exploring an open and interconnected Ishimura, and having Isaac be a character really brings up the overall experience.

The added flavor, altered sections, and rebalancing of the navigation (added backtracking and substantial rewards) makes this game an easy recommend for Survival Horror heads all around the world. I still haven't done my NG+ Run because Too Many Games came out, but I am genuinely in awe with how well this game turned out. Didn't expect EA to be the major western publisher to have the best track record of game releases, but here we are.

SUZUME

Okay, last Honorable Mention I swear. I said I would only do five, so I'm only gonna do five. Suzume I didn't see till late this year and might have liked it more than Your Name.? I'm not sure on that one, quite yet.

Good road trip vibes, light on a questionable age gap romance, and heavy on introspection about loss and grief. Very good, big recommend, incredible visuals and soundtrack. It's got the sauce. Also Shinkai's movies seem to have a slightly depressed older woman in them that makes me feel insane. Without fail.

I haven't seen Shinkai's full body of work or anything like that, but I don't think anything is topping his work on the OP for Falcom's Ys Eternal in 1998.

Okay. Now it's time for the real list. Where champions come to fight upon the Mountain Between Heaven and Earth that exists within my mind.

10. FIRE EMBLEM ENGAGE

This one kind of sneaked (hate that word, by the way) up on me. I forgot it came out this year just by virtue of it being a January game. It released early, this year was long, hell is real. I'm still more of a Three Houses dude, but a nice walk back towards the 'Awakening' style of fire emblem was nice because, after all, that was m first REAL experience with the series.

The game play is cracked in this one. I could leave it at that but that would defeat the purpose of this list, wouldn't it?

One look at this game and you can kind of tell what all it encompasses. The popping colors, the slick animations, and the wildly varying character designs (almost all of which bang, for the record) paint the picture of a game that is much more 'pop-y' than the previous entry in the series. This is not really a dark tale of war and tragedy, this is a fairy tale. And a damned good one. The main character, Alear, is a walking filter. Bright red and blue, accused of being a 'v-tuber', and a top notch freak. I love them.

It is the most snappy—did I already say that?--srpg I've played, while also having plenty of depth. I played on hard, which was hard, and constantly had to tweak and really dig into how my characters were built. This involved different classes, skills, weapons, and emblem rings to make each build feel completely unique. Though I think the support system—and overall narrative—was a bit on the weaker side, it still had a pretty great finale with one of the most satisfying 'says the name of the thing in the thing' I had witnessed all year. Top notch, all around. Shout out to Yunaka, who carried my entire playthrough.

9. BARRY SEASON 4

I love the show Barry. From dark comedy, to surrealist comedy, to surrealist drama? It's really hard for me to quantify how much this show changes, while not really changing all that drastically. It's a sort of slow crawl.

The pitch is simple, for season one. 'Hitman turns actor decides which life he wants to lead' or something like that. And we get that, sure. They could have easily kept that concept going for years but after season 2 finished, and season 3 started walking a certain way, I can't help but feel season 4 was inevitably going to be... strange.

However, I didn't expect to feel like I was watching several arthouse experiments crammed into a single season of television. I cannot help but wonder if the staff saw the direction HBO—and WB writ large—was heading, and decided to wrap it up as quickly as they could. To tell a complete story, instead of getting canned halfway through one for no reason.

So yeah, that Hitman sure did become an actor. And American society was deeply diseased all along. Sometimes people can't become any better than they were made to be.

8. FINAL FANTASY XVI

I almost didn't expect to put this on my list. I liked it a lot, even if I think it ended kind of weak. Not that it was a whimper, but I do not think it reached as far as its wings would carry it. With combat that becomes a little too simple and trivial by the end, and a story that shaves off much of what makes it interesting, I find myself dwelling more on the lows than the highs these days.

But there were highs. Highs that culminated in maybe my favorite moment of the year, a mission that involves the wildest ride of set pieces in the game—a high octane ride that reached so high it became an impossible task for the rest of the game to live up to it. And that's okay, truthfully. I love Clive, Jill, Cid, Joshua, and Dion quite a bit. It's a game that has, despite it all, stuck with me in a very impactful way. I still pray, every night, that they release an update that will juice up the combat JUST a bit. Because as an RPG or an Action game, it sort of fumbles.

But as a single-player MMO where you do big combo? It is very fun, cool, and interesting to think about. Final Fantasy games always sort of have that quality about them. For the good and the bad, they are always interesting experiences to digest and think about. Even one as 'safe' as this.

7. PLUTO

This might be higher, truly, but I wanted to write these feelings down as soon as possible. I had never read Pluto—I barely even knew it existed. I knew it had SOMETHING to do with Astro Boy, which I'm only really familiar with because I got really into Megaman a few years back and that naturally led me to the thing is is largely based upon. I knew about facets of Astro Boy, had seen SOME of the 2003 anime and such, but this would be the first piece of it I'd be comfortable in saying I properly digested.

And what a piece it is. Every hour long episode encapsulated a volume, a volume of beautifully crafted stories that ask just as much about human nature as it does the nature of robots and artificial intelligence. Also is has A LOT to say about the War on Terror. Which, especially for the time the manga dropped, is very salient. I don't think a single story moved me more than this one this year.

It has a more grounded approach to the world of Astro Boy, yet it doesn't dwell in cynicism or misery. In fact, it confronts it. Fights against it. And, by the time credits roll, it is asking you to ask yourself what you feel about these things. What do things like suffering and hatred mean to you? Violence and love? I don't have the answers, and neither does Pluto, but we will keep on searching for them, together.

6. JUJUTSU KAISEN SEASON 2

Okay here comes the first rule break. I've been watching this dubbed so TECHINICALLY I still have like two episodes to watch, so yeah. But whatever, Hidden Inventory alone would be enough to put this here. This might be the single most openly spoiled manga of all time, so I kind of knew what I was expecting walking into this.

Or, I thought I did. Sure some of the stuff people said happened, happened. But the way it was all animated, the sheer creativity on display, made me feel like I was experiencing it all fresh anyways. I hope MAPPA animators get rest. They have earned it.

Regardless of the wild and incredible visuals, the actually story of the two arcs within this season are peak Battle Shounen. I do wish that some of the main characters had more time to breathe before being thrown in The Perils, but at this point it feels like a nitpick.

At this point I think Yu Yu Hakusho is my favorite anime at all time, due in no small part to the Sensui arc. So, when I arrived at the Shibuya Incident, I was wonderfully greeted by a single premise. “What if we took the Sensui Arc, and sprinkled a little crack on it?” Every fight within this arc whips, cracks by at a lightning pace, and is narratively meaningful in one way or another. I have watched through 'Thunderclap' onward several times at night, just to watch fights again. I do Not do that. Like ever. A special show, that everyone warns me is going to get 'bad'. I'm not sure if I believe them :).

5. GODZILLA MINUS ONE

This was easily my favorite movie of a year. I can say easily, because I did not watch many movies. Still. I feel like between this and Shin Godzilla, we are in a new and wonderful era of Toho produced Godzilla films that both have something to say, and are creatively inspired.

Godzilla Minus One is a movie about life and living. Both of these things are important, and dying for one's country or cause is a sacrifice too casually made. We cannot devalue ourselves, we cannot devalue others or the impact they make. Because no matter how much you survived, there is always more to live for, in the end. The human spirit really is unbreakable.

I think I sort of forgot how good movies can be, in a way. Not to say I haven't seen NEW things that I enjoyed, I'm more talking about the artistry of it all. This felt like a blockbuster, in many ways, but one with heart and soul that you might often find missing from the disaster/big monster genre. I don't think it's necessary to drag other things down to prop this up, because even without those things this movie is a masterpiece, but I think it's important for my frame of mind going in.

I wasn't expecting to be on the verge of tears at every moment, I wasn't expecting to care about the human characters quite as much as I did, and I wasn't expecting to leave that movie with a fire in my heart that life remains undefeated. I love you, Godzilla Minus One.

4. ARMORED CORE VI

I like big robots. No, more than that, I LOVE big robots. I think they are cool, and the stories told within the genre are normally impactful in one way or another. So, when I finally played my first Armored Core (at least on my own, not rented or borrowed or at a friend's house) I was floored by just how much it felt like it was designed for robogooners everywhere. Building your mech, tweaking every little part of its design—from aesthetic to actual gameplay builds—and unleashing hell upon enemies was genuinely some of the most fun I had all year. It also helped me crawl out of the worst depression of my life, maybe, so that was neat.

The story itself is rather... good? Which I wasn't expecting! Not that I thought it would be bad, I just didn't think it would actually make me cry. There are no human faces in this game. Just robots, callsigns, and insignias. Yet somehow Rusty, Carla, and Ayre are three of my favorite characters of the year. I haven't got the 'true' ending yet, because I've only completed one route, but I can still safely put this in the top five of my list. At one point, I was convinced it was my favorite game of year.

Incredible combat, great characters and story, and music that will make you feel like you are ascending to the next plane. Sometimes, I still think about 'I won't miss' and feel my heart skip a beat. Play this game.

3. Xenoblade Chronicles 3: Future Redeemed

I have very complicated feelings on Xenoblade Chronicles 3 that I one day will finish writing about. Maybe I will even make a video, who knows. But for now I just want to say this. Future Redeemed was what I THOUGHT the base game was going to be. A narrative bookend, to the Xeno series as a whole, it has me extremely excited for the future of what Monolith might do, now that they are completely untethered to the saga they started in 2010.

It's bittersweet in a way, just how goddamn excellent it is to play Future Redeemed. It may be a little on the easy breezey side for me, but the act of exploring, questing, and fighting has been gamified here to the point where not a second felt unrewarded. The story is pretty fantastic, the music is fantastic, and the way it ties together all left over narrative threads had me more than satisfied.

One of those things that makes you grateful to be invested in the series as a whole. Cannot wait to run through it again, even if they don't mention Morag ONCE.

2. Resident Evil 4

Resident Evil has been on an insane hotstreak lately, and RE4 Remake did not change that in the slightest. For context, I never was a HUGE lover of the original game. I played the shit out of Resident Evil 2 original, Resident Evil Remake, and the old-styled games in general. I loved them. Zombies, inventory management, detrimental controls... what's not to love? So when 4 came out, and I was a dumb 9 year old baby, I just kind of... didn't love it. How could I have possibly understood the magnitude of the game I was playing? That it would change video games forever? I played a lot of mercenaries with a friend, played up to the castle a million times, and that was where what little love I had for the game ended.

Well, of course, I was there for the remake day one. From 7 onward, I don't think Capcom has put out a bad game. I expected this to be no different. And, it wasn't. It was of the quality of Resident Evil 2 Remake, only expanded outward into an action game that should make most other third person shooters blush a little.

Knife parries, gunplay, suplexes, and even a grapple gun (post DLC) make the combat feel like butter being spread over my brain. It's not often I run a game multiple times in a year, I'm normally the type to do a playthrough of something 'once a year' or whatever, but this game just kept me coming back. Over and over.

Everything about it is expertly crafted, and I think it deserves to be recognized as one of—if not the—best games of the year. Whether it's a remake or not.

1. THE LEGEND OF HEROES: TRAILS INTO REVERIE

Sometimes you just need to be fully honest with yourself. I really didn't think, for months now, that this game was going to top my list. I put off getting to it, because I had to drag myself through the Crossbell games first, and the aforementioned depression really put a damper on me doing, well, anything!

Besides, I had basically every aspect of this game spoiled for me to some degree by the most annoying people on the planet—so I assumed my experience would be somewhat hampered by that. It wasn't.

Though I knew the beats, I didn't know how much impact they would have on me. This is a series I've been with for like six years now, and I've played every entry up to this point. When game TEN serves as an epilogue to an arc, not blinking from the parts people supposed didn't like, and turning haters into believers—I think that's something special.

Rean Schwarzer is legitimately my favorite protagonist in the entire genre of RPGs, maybe even video games in general. The way he gets reduced online does bother me a little, but I let it slide—I can sleep easy knowing he is a wonderfully realized and layered character. Though he is only one of the three main protagonists in this game, it still is very much his game, and he is still very much explored to a degree even his own arc didn't. I felt such resolution by the end. The lessons he has learned, the growth he had undergone, it has all culminated in one of the best games in the series.

As for C, the less I say here about him the better. But just know I was always a believer and that paid off in SPADES. Just a wonderful look at what it means to live, to carry on a woeful legacy, and to truly 'atone'.

Lloyd was fine too, I guess. I like him—he is the shounen man. :)

I know this game TECHINICALLY came out in 2020 in Japan, but it's a new release here so it counts damn it. I won't leave it off my own list, with made up rules, just because NISA and Falcom make questionable decisions.

A game that you need to do some homework for, but a game that makes the homework all worth it. Cold Steel remains undefeated.

And. That's it. There's some other stuff I thought I would put on here, like Hi-Fi Rush and even Cyberpunk Phantom Liberty. But I guess I didn't! I was just winging it, and my feelings were my guide. If you read this, thanks for caring about what I had to say. I spent my entire New Year's Eve day writing this out, and I think it was fun and worth it. Here's to a good 2024! :)

[hegelundhong62]

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[softredrobin]

Rounding out our elementals with air, here’s Lasko! First of all I want everyone to know that my browser does not believe “Lasko” is spelled right, even when capitalized, and it has suggested Laski, Lasso, and the ever-hilarious Lasky as proper spellings. Admittedly I listen to Lasko the least of the three, but he’s still a special boi who gets a gold star in my heart. These two quotes are from Nervous Air Elemental Confesses His Feelings For You and the preview for his BA audio.

By this point I think you probably know what you’ll find below the cut: flowers and rambling! There’s also some extra goodies down there this time, plus a bit about next sets and such in this series.

These four flowers:

Peony: honor, love at first sight, beauty in all forms, bashfulness

Dandelion: overcoming hardship

Queen Anne’s Lace: haven, sanctuary, complexity, delicateness

Heather: solitude, beauty, admiration, protection

I listened to a not-mine playlist while doing this one, so if you’re interested you can find that playlist here. It’s a good one! As someone who loves Ricky Montgomery the fact that so many of his songs were included just fits my fancy, especially since I’ve always seen his music as a very Lasko-esque vibe :-)

Let’s talk flowers! First up for rambles is Queen Anne’s Lace. I grew up in a place where you could see a lot of QAL growing along the roadsides, bordering the fields (woot woot for rural areas and the abundance of farmland). This is the only flower I decided on before doing any research into its meaning, and only a little bit because I already knew about what it meant. Anyway, this paragraph is getting out of hand because I just want to recommend My Queen Anne’s Lace Bouquet by SincerelyWhistler on Ao3 for anyone who hasn’t read it yet.

Peony for the obviousness of bashfulness but also for Lasko’s confession, where he mentions that “I’ve had a crush on you for as long as I’ve known you, literally since the first time I met you, t-t-that first time you came into my office”, hence love at first sight. Dandelion with overcoming hardship for Lasko overcoming managing to confess and doing things even when they make him anxious or nervous, for FL’s difficulty with their first semester at D.A.M.N., and for their shared experiences with the humanborn experience. Heather for finding safety in someone you love.

And now an admission: I had literally never listened to Lasko’s BA before I needed to find quotes for this set... I listened to a part of the Lasko/FL/Gavin BA but that was it? I’m not really sure why because actually, it was nice, though to be fair I really only listened to the beginning (which is in the preview on YouTube). But! The quote I used from that one jumped out at me. Maybe I’ll actually listen to the whole thing at some point.

If you read this far, thanks for reading! I actually want to ask if anyone has any requests for the next set? I’m nearly out of characters I’ve planned anything for. I’d also appreciate quotes if you have a request since there’s always a chance I haven’t really listened to much of any specific character. 

I will say right now that I don’t plan on doing a set for Vega-influenced Ivan at all -- I’ve never listened to Sadism’s Hold, and I don’t plan on it. I’m on the fence about Regulus, so if I do that one it’ll be when there are more videos (both to pick quotes from and determine how I feel about the character). Characters like Geordi and Guy who don’t have many videos right now I will consider but it’ll depend on how I feel about the number of quotes I can get out of a lower pool of videos (I might want to wait until they have more). 

So far I’ve got a pool of quotes for Vincent, though if anyone wants a specific quote from Vincent I’d also love to hear it. Be assured also that Asher will be coming to finish off our wolf boi trio, I just have to go listen to his playlist for quotes (once again, any specific ones would be welcome). I also... well.

I had planned on doing a set for Caelum. I picked flowers and hand poses a while ago, and I was excited because it would really make the D.A.M.N. set complete. However, up until now, I’ve only done romantic interests with these sets. I had never even considered that the set might be interpreted in any way other than that platonic/familial context of the relationship FL and Caelum have, and so wasn’t concerned about that. But with the recent discourse, I’m worried about anyone interpreting it that way. Should I still do it? I love Caelum, he’s my buttercup and I was excited to do his set :-( Maybe if I put explicitly that I do not want my art to be interpreted in any way other than platonic and familial and to please not interact if you’re going to make it anything else? Let me know what you guys think.

[reidjumpers]

Here Comes the Sun: Dumplings

Spencer Reid x Reader

Warning: mentions of food, some curse words, domestic bliss, Spencer being a little anxious

Series Summary: a journey of going through parenthood with Spencer Reid

Chapter Summary: When Spencer woke up to you making dumplings in the dining table, he knew he was in trouble.

Note: welcome to the first chapter of dad!Spencer series! For those who have faint heart, fear not, because I am not mean and I write this so we can all have serotonin boost together. Enjoy!

prologue, next chapter, series masterlist.

Nobody in their right mind would ever call Spencer Reid a fool. He might have encountered people that underestimate him or didn’t think he was as smart, yes, but no one would ever call him a fool. Not even when Emily joked about his IQ getting slashed into 60 in the presence of a beautiful woman. He had to silently agree with that statement. How could he not? In front of him was a very beautiful woman that he had the luxury to call her his wife. His beautiful, gorgeous, very understanding, intelligent wife.

But right now he definitely felt like a goddamn fool.

When Spencer woke up to an empty bed and the apartment smelled distinctively sweet like the bakery, he thought he was waking up on a really good day. But when he walked out the bedroom and spotted you sitting at the dining table calmly, a hum of songs from the speaker played in the background, and a stack of dumpling skin placed on the table, he knew he was in the doghouse.

It was common knowledge that whenever you’re stressed or upset upon something or someone, when life seemingly wants to fucks you over and over, you’d channel it through baked sweets or as strange as it sounds, dumplings. He never knew witnessing you silently make dumplings on the dining table with freshly baked cookies on the counter would be such a terrifying and worrisome sight to see.

Spencer stood silently in the doorway, rocking on his heels forward and backwards. He was quiet and careful not to burst the bubble of your own world. His mind started to run a few scenarios inside his head over and over, trying to walk through every minute by minute of every event in his life that had led him into today.

“Hey,” he greeted you after two solid minutes of thinking and couldn’t come up with any answer. His voice was gentle to not startle you as he pulled a chair across yours.

“Good morning, sleeping beauty,” you teased. It was 11:15 AM, you were most definitely saying that just to tease him.

Spencer rolled his eyes at your jab, silently reached for the dumpling skin in front of him and started to fill it with the filling. He had done this thousands of times over to know the right way to make dumplings. Your first few dates with him consisted of homemade dumplings and sipping wine. He was honored when you showed him how to make dumplings the way your grandmother did it, grinning as you said it’s a family secret and he promised to keep it as one.

“Are we having a guest?” Spencer asked as he put his own dumpling carefully into the designated plate. His dumpling would never be as good as yours no matter how much he tried, but he was proud that it was passable enough to your standard.

“No?” you furrowed your eyebrows, glancing up from your own dumpling. “Why?”

“You make more dumplings than usual,” he pointed out.

“Oh,” your voice was soft, barely audible, and he nearly missed it. “Didn’t realize that.”

Spencer nodded, reaching for another dumpling skin to soothe his worry away. Study has shown that repetitive action proven to soothe anxiety and increase focus. He could recite the study in his sleep, forward and backwards without stuttering. But the damned repetitive action of making dumplings didn’t work for him right now.

He cleared his throat. It is now and never. He would have to kiss his husband of the year trophy goodbye if he couldn’t figure out for his life what makes his wife this upset. “Hon?” he called for your attention.

You let out a hum of acknowledgement, eyes didn’t leave your dumpling for a second. It made the corner of his lips twisted downwards.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” he asked gently, mindful not pressing you into telling him things. He knew you would never keep things away from him. You would tell him eventually, but he needed to hear it.

You, however, just scrunched your nose adorably in confusion. “Talk about what?”

“You bake cookies and make dumplings, and it’s just…” he craned his neck to take a glance towards the hanging clock above the cabinet. “It’s not even twelve yet.”

You blinked at his statement. “I’m hungry.”

“You do stress bake,” he patiently pointed out. Placing his yet another passable looking dumpling into the designated plate, he let out a sigh. “You also make dumplings when you’re stressed or upset. And now you do both first thing in the morning.”

“You know me so well, huh? You should marry me if you know me so well.”

“Already did, nine months ago,” Spencer rolled his eyes at your humor, but a smile graced his lips. “So, do you want to talk about it?”

You blinked at him again, nose scrunched up in confusion at his question. Spencer could feel silence slowly settling in, filling the gaps between you and him. His mind started to make a list of things that you like, making mental notes to make a short trip to a grocery store to pick up your favorite ice cream and take a reroute towards the flower shop he saw a week ago and picked up a bouquet of roses.

He was in the middle of mentally reciting his apology for fucking up when he heard you burst into a laughter. It took him a moment to register that the sound of you cackling so hard was not a mere figment of his imagination. He saw you laughing so hard, head thrown backwards overwhelming the small dining room.

“I’m sorry,” you hiccupped, wiping away tears from your eyes with your sleeve. Spencer would’ve smiled at the sight if he weren’t so puzzled. “Babe, are you really thinking I’m mad at you because I bake cookies and make dumplings?”

Spencer sputtered, “How could I not!” he huffed, throwing his hands into the air dramatically as you laugh upon his misery. “I was so worried! You always either bake or make dumplings when you’re upset, but never both! And now you do both and you keep dodging my question.”

“I didn’t mean to!” you said defensively between your laughter. You cleared your throat, not wanting to make the pout on Spencer’s lips even more prominent. “I guess my brain really associated cookies and dumplings as something comforting. I crave for some comfort food, and my brain just screams, ‘cookies and dumplings!’ I didn’t mean to make you worried, I’m sorry.”

“This much? You’re really hungry, huh?”

“Pretty hungry since I’m eating for two now.”

Spencer froze on his spot, his hand stopped midair before he was able to reach for another dumpling skin. He blinked. Once. Twice. Three times. “W-what?”

You just smiled cheekily at him. You got up from your seat and walked towards the kitchen, leaving him alone flabbergasted at your statement. You came back a minute later, a wide smile at your face and your hand tucked behind your back.

“Ta-da!” you cheerfully said, placing baby shoes on the table in front of him. Spencer let out a soft gasp, cooed at the sight of how tiny the shoes are.

“Are you…? Are we…?”

“Pregnant,” you finished his sentence for him with a wide grin. “I found out during our case in LA and I was meaning to tell you earlier, I swear! But the case got a little crazy and we’re whisked away into doing a lot of things at once.”

Spencer let out a shaky breath, staring into the baby shoes with eyes full of awe. The news still felt unreal for him, artificial, but the warmth blooming on his chest that slowly spreading through his system left him fuzzy. A small reminder that it was as real as he wanted to be.

You probably have mistaken his silence for something else as you shifted your weight from one foot to another. You started to fidget with the hem of your shirt, eyes not meeting his. “I know we agree to wait for a year, but–”

Spencer practically leaped from his seat and scooped you into his arms. His smile was so wide that his cheeks started to hurt. You let out a small yelp as he spun you around before he placed a tender kiss on your lips. “I love you,” he said between your kisses, grinning as he stole a few more small kisses.

You giggled between his kisses, your hand flew into his face and patted his cheeks as he assaulted your face with his lips. “I love you too, you big goof.”

“A baby, huh?” Spencer let out a happy sigh after he spared your life from his kisses. His hand nestled on your waist, gently swaying you in his arms. “We’ve got to start baby proofing the whole place, make sure there are no sharp edges,” he rambled.

“Spencer–”

“I’ll go to the bookstore and pick up some book about baby names! Do you think Jason is a good name?”

“I think–”

“Oh, we should start shopping for some clothes and socks too. Make sure they’re warm–”

“Spencer!” you interrupted his rambling with your hands squishing his face. You smiled at him as he blinked his eyes towards you slowly, a little fazed that you broke his train of thought. “I love all the planning ideas, but right now let’s just focus on making dumplings and feed three of us, okay?”

“Okay,” he breathed out, slowly collapsing into his seat again. “Okay. Dumplings…” he muttered to himself, grabbing the dumpling skin in front of him. “But seriously, what do you think about the name Jason?”

“It’s a lovely name.”

“Oh, common ground. I like that.”

====================================

Series tag list:

@measure-in-pain @wooya1224 @reidemandweep @manuosorioh

[jiminrings]

petition for stem koo to do all the things for oc he originally said no one does (make her lunchboxes, makes her cheerful...) bc i think that’s a beautiful redemption arc

cold senior!y/n x stem major!koo masterlist :D

jungkook's day one of his redemption agenda doesn't go that well in the end

"namjoon!!! my man. got any updates for me?"

seokjin strolls coolly on the way to his office, hair slicked back and his dress shirt definitely missing more than a few buttons

what's head admin gonna do??? dress-code him???

fire him???? PLS HE'D BE BETTER OFF!!!!

jin makes student affairs his bitch,,, not the other way around

"for the last time, i am nOt your secretary!!" namjoon stresses as he ceases his typing just to glare at him

he's the university registrar and everyone needs to go through him and at this point he's like a historical landmark from how he's made impact in less than two years

and he and seokjin graduated from the same batch!!!! they're the uncanny always pair for the subjects they shared together

it was definitely weird but functional lol cause one is uptight yet hardworking and the other's relaxed yet smart

sue them for working in the same place they swore they'd never go back to after graduation </3

"if you say-"

"some kid's been waiting for you even before i opened the office. made him sit inside but i just told him that he'd be expelled if he even tries to touch your coffee machine."

namjoon says even before jin could finish the sentence, clearly holding that in until the last minute

jin's obviously a lil annoyed because he's starting work as early as now but the way that joon laid all that out on him is a highlight for him

"thanks. knew you're a secretary for me first and a registrar second."

"no. i'm a national citizen before-"

alright alright he's not listening anymore

this bETTER be important because jin has to hold out his morning routine for whoever this kid is

"what can i possibly do for you today?" he rubs his eyes in preparation, intentionally dragging his steps because just looking at how near he is to his work computer gives him vertigo

"mr. kim!!!"

no

there is no way

there is no fATHOMABLE way that this has got to be happening to seokjin right now

"..... jungkook. what a pleasure."

he sits on his chair, voice gritted and monotone and he could just feel his eye twitching, his clenched fist under his deck now flipping off the kid in secret

it's a last-minute realization that he grasps that jungkook doesn't know you're his friend and it presents some really unique vantage points

like the time that seokjin recounted about a ridiculous student's filing for theft of his lunchboxes and he turned out to be your crush

or when he used his student affairs capabilities and pulled up resources left and right when jungkook broke your heart then seriously contemplated about messing up his academic record

or that time when he delivered a high and sleepy you to bed and then heard the entire conversation (if you could even call it that) between yoongi and this fucking nerd

"i need your help, mr. kim. you're the closest one to me i could ask!!" jungkook pleads desperately, the big doe eyes not really inducing an effect on him whatsoever lmao

"mhmm. i may not be the person for the job. counseling is right next door."

jin hums without even attempting to get jungkook to elaborate because for all he knows, his services aren't exactly open for people who hurt his friends >:(

(a guy once bumped shoulders with yoongi twice on the same day with aTTITUDE!!! and seokjin just dismissed the dude's concerns when a prof of his, who's a buddy of jin's, suddenly gave him an F)

seokjin IS student affairs

“no, no. you’re the only one who can help me!! you see, i-i just feel this brotherly connection with you and-“

“we talked once.”

god what did you used to see in this kid??

a crybaby aND an easily-attached personality to him? god it’s like jungkook’s just asking jin to pick on him

jungkook doesn’t seem to pick up how jin’s making it obvious he really doesn’t want to be of help if it has something to do with him

he likes interrupting and jin’s just the perfect match to interrupt him even earlier so now they just sound like one of those dubsmash snippets

“MR. KIM!!! how do you make lunchboxes? i don't know how.”

jeez where are his manners :O aren’t nerds like him supposed to worship the ground that admins walk on,,,

but what did pique his attention is the content of what jungkook just said

.... lunchboxes?

jin doesn’t want to give the kid benefit of the doubt because the last time he did that, you got hurt!!!!

if he has to hear hyeji’s name one more time, he’d really waste no time in stripping jungkook’s name from the honor roll

“remember that time i thought someone was stealing my lunchboxes?” he quizzes jin like it’s his job, clueless how he’s poking the bear even more with where he decides to go with this, “yeah. turns out no one was.”

was that not made clear the first time around!!!!!! he knows for a fact that a uni student would trade a classmate for a pack of gum but nO ONE would go for stealing a lunchbox

no one wakes up one day and decides that they’d steal a lunchbox. literally none

“but then this random girl claimed that it was hers a-and well i-...”

kook pauses to gauge jin’s reaction, clearly seeing now the one brow that’s raised at him

oh so if jungkook just asked him how to make a lunchbox, and he called h-word random,,,, then that would mean-

“i may have hurt the original giver of my lunchboxes at the process.”

.... that means he’s asking how to make a lunchbox for you

well that was a pleasant surprise

seokjin snorts briefly at that, dryly chuckling with his eyes widening to stress out his “non-threat” that’s pretty mUCH a threat

“wow. i might just give you a sanction for that.”

does he think jungkook’s a good person? lol he has to think about that for a month

was he wrong for hurting you that way? ultimately yes

but did he think at some point that jungkook’s completely heartless and wouldn’t try to redeem himself to his senior? no, not completely

but is he still on your team, regardless if the kid begs for mercy and you forgive him? yea a hundred percent :D yoongi and seokjin could never be brought out from your circle

"and you're doing this why?"

this is a no-brainer question for jungkook but the question still spooks him, feeling the chills at his neck that responding to seokjin is like a sTEPPING STONE when it comes to you

lmao if only he knew

"i uh, i just really wanna make this right. i messed up completely and it's pretty much unforgivable, but i atleast wanna try and give my best even if she doesn't forgive me, y'know?"

interesting

"mhmm. right, right."

???

he's still mad but he appreciates that jeon's doing the bare minimum of redeeming himself

speaking of, the poor kid looks like he's pissing himself because he may have just embarrassed himself with how long the silence stretches out

maybe,,, just maybe jin's gonna try and be a bridge this time

but like as soon as jungkook lacks for a fourth of a second, seokjin would BURN that bridge faster than a blink

"well first of all, you buy a lunchbox."

RIGHT RIGHT

:O

jungkook grabs a literal pocket notebook and jin pretends he didn't see that because WHO the hell does that!!!!

"of course... okay, proceed!! i'm taking notes," jungkook nods in understanding, jotting down the very important advice of not ordering from online because you can't smell the material through a screen

p.s. smelling containers before you buy them is a VITAL thing to do!! it already tells you about the quality at the first sniff

"are you buying one?"

"buying one for every day of the week. i'm thinking if i should get extras too-

"good idea. i recommend buying eight."

alright seokjin's mentioning some very specific colors and schemes and jungkook's not complaining!!!

MAYBE HE'S ONTO SOMETHING!!!

"what meals should i make? i don't even know what she likes!! and even if i knew what, how would i make it?"

why is his heart racing

yoongi may have taught you how to do your taxes but jin taught you how to cook food that's more than four steps!!!

he taught you how to not flinch at all when you're frying and that's the equivalent of raising you to be the woman that you are now <3

look at him and yoongi being your best friends!! teaching you about taxes and being unnerved at cooking oil and busting out a smoke ring or two <3

in fact, the lunches you've cooked for jungkook are all inspired and derived by seokjin!!!

the fact that jungkook's plan isn't bad and the way everything pieces together with his insight,,,, goosebumps luv

"....hypothetically? what i think she'd like?"

jungkook eagerly nods with stars in his eyes, fingers gripping onto his pen for dear life as he tries to channel all his listening techniques into this lecture

"get a bigger notepad."

:O

wow

"look at you!!" yoongi gushes the moment he sees you, waiting at you from the front door

you're going back to your classes again :D

you don't look as worse as you did four days ago!! you're not as sluggish and as animated too

"please don't," you snort as yoongi doesn't seem to stop looking at you like you've saved the world, giving no fight when he insists on carrying your backpack to your first class of the day

the past four days,, yeah they were undoubtedly rough

you slept as much as you could and for the moments you weren't dejected enough to be awake, you spent it surrounding yourself with seokjin and yoongi as much as possible

that's the beauty of hanging out them!!! you're not required to have a single thought lmao

except for the time when yoongi wondered aloud how eels even live and die (or if they even do???) in the first place and that sent everyone in a spiral and you didn't think of jungkook for a single seconds

you're not intimidated to go back to regular programming or with the fact that it's nOT unlikely you'd see a glimpse of jungkook in the hall and such

but that does mean that even if you're the bigger person, you're still gonna avoid him for as long as you could

speaking of!!!! you're looking for the person now that you're eager to find

"taehyung!!"

there he is :D you'd recognize that fluffy mop of permed hair anywhere

"y/n!!"

tae jumps over chairs in excitement to finally see you again after being so worried for you, engulfing you in a hug immediately

alright you see why yoongi thinks he's a golden retriever

you're clearly not a touchy-feely person but you'd let this one pass,, tae helped you (even indirectly) throughout your downtime anyways

"thank you so much for the cookies. i tried taking smaller bites just because i didn't wanna have them disappear that easy," you confess sheepishly, knowing how you had to pull the i just got my heart broken like two days ago multiple times so the two menaces would stop stealing from your stash

:D

jungkook's excited!!!! seokjin may have given him a tip that "he felt it in his gut" that you were gonna go to class today

he came a little late because he wanted to perfect the very loaded lunchbox that's in his backpack right now

oh weird

you're not in your usual chair

bUT jungkook sees a glimpse of your hair and he's certain that you're there and his heart may be beating out of his ribcage

a baby peach lunchbox with a sticker (of what seokjin said he thought you'd like) on the middle of the lid :D

pork katsudon with furikake rice aND coffee jelly pudding on the side!!! it was definitely pressure-racking to strictly adhere to jin's recipe but god does it look worth it

jungkook's only did miniature taste tests on it and he had to stop himself from devouring the lunch that he's made specifically for you

the lunchbox itself is tied neatly with a silk wrap, adding his touch of sewing your name visibly on it aND there's a scribble taped to the lid too

god jungkook really can't wait to make it up to you

sheesh that was one of THEE longest lectures you've ever felt you had

it was actually the same amount of time it's always been but maybe you've been out of practice from just staying at your dorm for days

tae's great company but he could be a little bit chatty!!! you just nod when you feel his voice go up and he apparently gets excited by that easily

.... he apparently also has a small bladder and he told you that within the whole hour of class

"hold on. i gotta pee before next period. go without me!!!' taehyung hurriedly slings his backpack to his arm, looking ridiculous in a rush

tae's sometimes unintentionally funny because you don't even share next period anyways

you're on your way to the exit when a shiny scarf catches the corner of your eye, having to squint at it because wow does it look pretty

is that-

is that your nAME???

you pick it up before you could even rationalize it, realizing then what it was wrapping when you feel the warmth on your hands

:")

"sorry i forgot my headband!!!"

taehyung stumbles back into the room, catching his breath to run back to his seat and fetch the headband he took from his hair to play with awhile ago

he looks shocked to see what's on your hands, flicking his gaze between you and the item but he doesn't think much of it

wOW that's a really shiny scarf!!!

"tae?"

"hmm yeah? what's up?"

he's about to jog back to the comfort room because he hasn't really relieved himself yet, not bearing to leave his headband in the room when anyone could snatch it up

you raise your lunchbox, a thankful gaze on your eyes that looks so close to crying which is why tae's mORE than lost now

"thanks for the lunch."

..

.....

jungkook could only helplessly watch.

[universalistotalis]

Stiff That You Love

Ushijima Wakatoshi (Timeskip!) x Female reader

Masterlist!!!

You never thought you'd see him again. You almost choked on the truffle pasta that you ordered in this café when a certain beautiful giant waved and made his way to you.

"Holy damn." You whispered underneath your breath as his strides made their way towards your table. You knew he was already a show stopper back then, but now???!

You were so sure everyone would drop dead at the sight of him.

"Hi." He greeted with his deep voice. "Do you still remember me?"

Surprise filled your expression at his question but you smiled politely and nodded your head. "How could I forget? How are you Ushijima?"

You swore you saw a glint of relief and excitement in his eyes but it immediately wavered as he motioned to the chair in front of you.

"May I?" He asked again, holding the back of the chair.

Is he really going to sit here with me?!

"Sure, of course." Your voice squeaked at the feeling of your heart bursting out of your chest. His greeting was enough to kick the air out of your lungs but a whole conversation?! You didn't know how long you would last in his ever- intimidating presence.

-

It was already the last year in college and you were so determined to graduate with latin honors. Every single minute of your life, you dedicated it to studies, friends and family. They were all that mattered. And so you stayed until the wee hours at certain café spots around the university or at the library inside the campus. You went to meet up with friends during the weekends only for a simple dinner or lunch. You called your family members every chance you get during free time. That was your life. And you were content.

But then this boy came in to the picture.

"You will be partnered together and I shall assign the pair. Make sure you finish the written output, video presentation, and oral defense at the end of the semester." Those were the words of your professor during one of your classes before yours and his name were called out together.

You swore it was fate. Romance was really not in the forefront of your mind but as they say, "You'll find it best when you're not looking".

AND MY GOD WERE YOU SO WRONG!

This man named Ushijima Wakatoshi who came out from nowhere, looking as good they come, had no ounce of romance nor funny bone in his muscular body. He was the most dense, most serious, most infuriating man you've ever met in your whole life!!! He was a whole perfectionist, always so blunt at his comments about the outputs that you showed him. He was also so strict with the deadlines, not considering that you had other classes than this that had much more weight and importance.

You were so close to giving up but...

"Y/n?" You knew that voice only belonged to the certain antagonist in your story right now.

Your hands trembled as you wiped the tears streaming down your face after your meeting together at the library.

"Ushijima, hey!" You pretended to be your usual chirpy self as you turned around to face him.

It was already late so the lights surrounding the university casted an unworldly glow on his face. He was always so breathtaking no matter where you put him but damn those looks! He was just as heartless.

"Are you alright?" He asked with a worried tone.

"I'm fine. I'll be going home now. See you next week." You excused yourself.

"Wait." His cold fingers caught your arm and that made you stop your tracks.

"Is there a problem, Wakatoshi?"

He bowed his head before slowly releasing you in his grip. "I wanted to apologize for my behavior."

"W-what?" You wanted to make sure if what your ears heard was right. He does not seem the type to apologize.

You heard another deep sigh as he looked at you. "I've always been told that I come off too much to others. I didn't realize it until recently when one of my friends told me."

"Oh, well..."

"I'll try to be better though. I'll be more careful from now on. And I'm really sorry if I ever hurt your feelings in the past." He said with all seriousness that you can't help but sigh and just nod.

"You can be really mean sometimes." You agreed and chuckled, letting a tear escape your eyes.

"You've been crying." He stated flatly as if he was reciting a trivia. "I'm still so sorry."

You giggled. "Yeah, I forgive you. Anyway, it's getting late, Wakatoshi. We have to head home."

"I'll walk you home." He said with a finality in his voice. You were again, surprised by his actions but just agreed because this was such a draining day.

And as you were nearing where you stayed, you were again surprised at how comforting his presence was.

--

You did find his presence after that night relaxing. He became more tactful and he started to insert jokes during your meetings which shocked you so much the first time that he felt a little offended. You became such close friends that his team mates in volleyball were again, shocked that he managed to get a friend outside the team. It was just a matter of getting used to, you thought to yourself. He's just so honest, mechanical, and straightforward to a fault and you got to master how to tell him off when needed. He also developed to trust you so whenever he needed advice, he would always go to you and trust your honest words.

Looking at him now, it made your heart warm at how far he'd come. It's amazing to have known him then. To have seen how he grew as an athlete, a student, and a person. He may still be a little stiff but that's just the Wakatoshi you've come to love.

"Soo..." He started while sitting back down again after claiming his coffee from the counter. "I am not disturbing you, am I?" He pointed at the laptop and papers next to you.

You laughed. "Not at all! I finished them anyway."

"How have you been then?" He asked. His elbows were resting on the table and his hands were holding on to the cup of coffee. The sight was a little funny considering his giant built was leaned onto a very small table.

You smiled gently. "I've been good! I got the job that I dreamed of having and I own some businesses too. Ho--"

"Your eyes sparkle the same way." He cut off.

"What?" You asked, surprised at his random comment.

"Your eyes..." He pointed out. "They sparkle the same way they did in college when you were talking about something you like."

"How did you notice that?" You laughed.

"I'm known to be observant." He smirked slightly, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Okay, Mr. Oh-So-Observant, how are your matches going? I've been tuning in since the first tournament and it looks like you're going to the semi- finals!" You cheered not hiding your pride and excitement for the country's national volleyball team. When you searched on how to watch the live games, you insisted that you were there to cheer for the country and definitely NOT to cheer and simp for a certain brown- haired, serious player. Definitely NOT!

"You've been watching our games?" He asked, eyes slightly widening at the thought of you cheering for him. What he didn't know was that you were always watching his games since college, not missing even one match. You were always there, crying at how proud you were of him. Also, crying at how much he could never be yours.

"Of course, I have, silly!" You chuckled and pointed at your laptop. "I've been watching here and you're just so amazing and strong!"

He suddenly paused at your statement, silently raising a brow at you and smiling softly.

"I- I meant that your whole team is amazing and strong." You clarified, a blush automatically painting the whole of your face and ears.

"Would you like to go tomorrow?" He blinked, setting down his cup on the wooden surface. "To the game, I mean?"

Your eyes widened at his offer. "Are you serious?!"

He chuckled at your reaction. "Of course! We're allowed to bring spectators for the games, I'll just give you the tickets."

"Wow, Ushijima, thank you so much! It's an honor!" You chimed excitedly, jumping a little on your chair.

"The honor's mine." He replied, grinning at you.

He already knew back then that you were one of a kind. No one ever really stayed and tried to understand his demeanor and personality but you did. You were so honest and kind and you always knew what to do or say to keep him at ease. You accepted him for who he was and he's so thankful to have met such a beautiful soul. Even when you were doing nothing, even when you're just sitting across this table from him, without you knowing, you already made up his entire exhausting day. Hell, you made up all those exhausting years of not seeing each other since you two graduated. He suddenly imagined if being with you would always be like this. So peaceful and just pure bliss...

"You've got to be shitting on me! Is that Ushiwaka?" The pair sitting next to the glass walls of the café was oblivious of the red- haired tower and group of men walking past the street. All of them were wearing coats and casual attires as they're planning to go for lunch at their favorite restaurant for a little reunion. The all powerful Shiratorizawa Volleyball Team, headed by Ushijima in high school, cowered like puppies at the name of their captain being mentioned.

"Where?!" Goshiki stopped and shielded himself from an invisible force. "He said he couldn't make it!"

"I guess our baby's growing up, look!" Tendou hummed and pointed at the two of you laughing and looking at each other with heart eyes. "I bet they don't know that they're shooting hearts at each other."

"I never thought he could smile like that." Semi whispered.

"Yeah well, he's been crushing on that girl since college." Tendou filled the silent wonder of the whole group. "That's why she looked familiar! He kept sending me photos of them together studying or something..."

"Studying, my ass!" Shirabu laughed as they continued staring and hiding behind a post at the same time.

They all burst out laughing and again Tendou chuckled. "No seriously, they were studying!"

"Yeah well, they look good together. I hope he'd have the balls to ask her out. Please god!" Goshiki put his hands together as if seriously praying.

"Bet you 10, 000 yen, we'd be attending his wedding two years from now." Semi challenged.

"Nah, I'll go with a year." Tendou offered.

The men casted their bets on how long you and Ushijima would get married. They knew their captain so well to be sure enough that he was serious with you. Safe to say, Semi won the bet.

--

Reblogs are appreciated! <3